#petrus song

[anokha-swad]

Simon Peter there on the shore, without a catch after a long night, fisherman whom the unknown caller makes a fisher of men: pray that our gifts may also have purpose and measure in Christ, that your zeal may burn in us and our hearts may recognise the Lord. Simon Peter, often tormented by weakness, fear and failure, you, whose word and purpose are broken when the Lord chooses suffering: pray that we may feel remorse when we lose Jesus' way, that we may not trust our strength and look to Christ in the storm.

***

Simon Petrus dort am Ufer, ohne Fang nach langer Nacht, Fischer, den der fremde Rufer sich zum Menschenfischer macht: bitte, dass auch unsre Gaben Ziel und Maß in Christus haben, dass in uns dein Eifer brennt und das Herz den Herrn erkennt. Simon Petrus, oft von Schwächen, Angst und Misserfolg gequält, du, dem Wort und Vorsatz brechen, als der Herr die Leiden wählt: bitte, dass wir Reue spüren, wenn wir Jesu Weg verlieren, dass wir unsrer Kraft nicht trauen und im Sturm auf Christus schauen.

[pileojunk]

I am completely normal for this man

[woklaza]

Mafia Soukoku headcanon: Chuuya was forced to learn to play the piano by Kouyou so he has better 'mind coordination'. So in their apartment, there's a piano in the living room. Dazai, being Dazai, would hide stuff inside the piano until it finally broke one day.

Chuuya, practicing: Dazai, being a perfect pitch: Why did the song start with D instead of E? Chuuya: I guess the piano got old. *continues playing* A loud twang from inside the piano: Bwangggg Chuuya: What the...? *Checks the inside of the piano* Chuuya, abnormally quiet: Dazai. Dazai, all innocent-like: Yes? Chuuya: There are 12 cans of tinned crabs, a moulding sandwich, a pouch of diamonds, 40 bottles of painkillers and A WHOLE BOTTLE OF PETRUS-

The Petrus apparently broke the strings for being too heavy. Chuuya and Dazai decided to keep the broken piano and not discard it.

[lilacargent]

Here we go again,

Puzzles/ jigsaws would confuse Aliens so much

Set on the serpentine, beginning of the humans tenure

Important crew:

Primoz, captain -Limoyh a four armed species-Krag, second in command (brother of Primoz)

Kit, dokter -avian, bird like, she has feathers like a swallow-

Ortez, ASR (all species resources, human resources in space) -kiltak, insectoid species, think ants but exoskeleton-

Lugea, helmsperson (does the steering) -rock like alien-

Artex, engineer/mechanic 1 -also Kiltak-

And then our humans:

Kamari, navigator -Eritrean woman- (has cat named Sidra)

Markus, weapons expert (knows how to use them and upkeep, also shields) -Swedish man-

Petrus, mechanic/engineer 2 - Italian man-

Lilly, administrator/note keeper (learns languages for fun)-english woman-

~~~~~~~

Puzzles

The serpentine is on route between trading posts, this is currently the furthest route without proper jump point because of the static energy surrounding the dual planets castor and pollux.

Primoz is getting worried. The humans are becoming increasingly more jittery and Kamari looks like she a pinch away from punch someone, Markus has been ‘humming’ a song that annoys her greatly. Honestly the noises the tall man is making don’t seem that bad but every few minutes her eyebrows twitch which Ortez told him is a sign of frustration.

Before the captain can figure out how to keep them from doing something deathworld worthy, Lilly comes in with precariously stacked carton boxes and Petrus carrying a table. Setting the pile down the smallest human straightens out “look what i brought! Old earth puzzles! This one has a deer and this one has the old world wonders” immediately the humming stops and Markus is at the table with Petrus “oh yes Lilly you are the best! I wanna do the deer one, that is gonna be a challenge”

With the table in the corner of the bridge the tension among crew is nearly gone, as all species try to put the cut apart pictures together, Lilly brought 9 puzzles and at a certain point a competition was forming: after one of the human unit had finished a puzzle the other crew try to make it in less time. They have yet to win.

Looking at his relaxed crew Primoz grins at his brother who is trying to use all his four arms to put pieces together without much succes. Turning away from the competition he taps Lilly on her shoulder “how do you guys do it? Also why did you think to take these things with you.” Lilly looks up from her drawing (the crew bent over the table making the puzzle) “well i knew it was going to be a long trip, Kamari thinks Markus will be ‘professional’ but he can’t help himself” her soft smile when she puts air punctuation around professional makes her look much younger than she is “puzzles are something many humans enjoy, not everyone is as good at them as Markus, but he does this thing where he uses the shape of them more than colours. While he isn’t colour blind, he has real trouble with telling differences in shades. No idea why it works this well but it does, Petrus has already won three nights of free drinking on Castor from betting.” All of a sudden looking bashful Lilly ducks her head “ah eh yes sorry forget i said that we don’t bet on this at all!” Primoz just grins “nobody has broken anything this whole trip, im not going to disrupt the flow you and your unit created. Don’t worry.”

At arrival Petrus has won the whole human crew free drinks for the foreseeable future, and the crew in its entirety hooked on puzzles. While not all species see the colours the same way or understand the patterning in the pieces the feeling of putting in the correct pieces makes it such an enjoyable activity that Lilly brings new puzzles after every holiday back home.

~~~~~~~~~

This one was born out of the confusion my family had when we were making puzzles (jigsaws?) the pictures in pieces… this is where it becomes super clear English is not my first language. Anyway, we had two puzzles out and they were so surprised i could differentiate the positions the pieces needed to be in without context. I had to tell them that the pattern otherwise won’t make sense,

I have the same thing as Markus that colours are fine unless you put several of the same colours next to each other and call them different. This is why the deer one is super hard,

The two puzzles that were described:

[sonder-paradise]

𝐈 𝐊𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐞 — 𝐂𝐡𝐮𝐮𝐲𝐚 𝐍𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚

◊ ft. chuuya nakahara, gn!reader

◊ genre. comfort, birthday fic for the bday boy

◊ synopsis. just a night with chuuya, a couple minutes before and after his birthday. based off the song, Ég veit þú kemur.

I know you’ll come to me tonight, 

though we only met briefly yesterday. 

“We’re here again.”

Chuuya chuckles, sipping from the glass in his hands. He relaxes in your words, allowing himself to soak in the sweet tune of the jukebox in the back of the bar. It plays a lively tune with a young singer’s foreign tongue echoing out a pretty song. 

“We’re always here,” he comments, flashing an amused smirk at you. 

“Well, this particular bar is sort of…” you pause, leaning back in your barstool to ponder over the next words, “It’s sort of like our thing, you know?”

Chuuya seems to approve of your words, humming a sort of soft acceptance to them. 

“What? Do you disagree? I couldn’t think of a better way to spend your birthday.”

He clicks his tongue, raising his glass to summon yours. In an instant, you raise it, clinking it against his. He seems to find you amusing tonight. You want to say the same. But you find yourself lost in the subtle way he captures your attention. 

I won’t believe a word you say,

if the stars tell me otherwise

“No, you’re right. It’s perfect.”

You wonder how something like this could have occurred so quickly. You don’t remember what it was like not having Chuuya in your life. He fit into place so naturally. The words he said and the things he did moved so cosmically and even now, you lean against the bar counter, questioning how such a man came to be in your life. 

“Happy Birthday.”

Chuuya smiles, wrapping an arm around your waist. He smells briefly of sandalwood and something… familiar. You can’t quite place your finger on it, but you find it enchanting regardless. 

“It’s not yet my birthday though.” 

You glance up at the clock above the bar. “Ten more minutes.” 

“See?”

Laughter escapes your lips as you realize he’s technically correct. 

“Sorry. I’m just excited I suppose.” You pause, taking a moment to admire his features while he’s still here. Time is such a funny thing. Luckily for you, time has yet to change Chuuya’s features just yet. Your hand reaches towards him to cusp his cheek and he captures your hand in his own gloved one, kissing your palm gently. 

“Something on your mind, Darling?”

You blink at him, the feeling of his rough lips against your fingertips has the butterflies in your stomach fluttering madly. He’s too much sometimes, honestly. 

“Nothing. Just wondering if you’ll like my present.”

“You got me something?” 

And then everything will be as it was,

before you know it, you’ll know.

A childish sort of look seeps into his pretty eyes and you laugh, pressing your forehead to his. He chuckles, the sound is rough and somehow still smooth. It reminds you of wine and music. 

“Yes, I got you something. But it’s at home.”

He frowns slightly, clearly making a mockery of himself and the fact he’s being a bit of a child. But the sight has you shaking your head at him. 

“Do you want to guess what it is?”

Chuuya raises an eyebrow. You notice now that his cheeks are starting to flush a pale pink. As per usual, he’s never been good at holding his liquor, even if it is just a couple sips of his favorite wine.

“A new hat chain?”

“Nope.”

“Another bottle of Petrus?”

“Too expensive!”

Chuuya squints, now leaning his head against your shoulder whilst he contemplates the various objects you may have given him. His breath tickles your skin, sending shivers up your spine. 

“A dog…?!”

He sits up this time, clearly excited at this particular prospect. So much so, you sort of regret the fact that that’s not exactly what his present is. Then again, there’s time to change that. 

And this thing because of the bar

between us was left in peace.

At your contemplating silence, he seems to take that as his answer. His eyes widen then light up as he pulls away from you to stare in surprise. His mouth agape as if he can’t believe it himself. 

“Did I guess correctly?”

You shift uncomfortably in your seat. Well, it would be a shame to say no now… Staring at his expression, it pains you to potentially say no to this excited reaction. 

“Yup..!”

Chuuya sighs, flicking you on the side of the head and turning back to his drinks. His expression flattens as he clicks his tongue. 

“You can just say no, you know? I’m not gonna be upset.”

You shrink in your seat. You should have known he would read through you so easily. But seeing as he seems rather alright with this answer, you don’t press on it. Otherwise, you may have to take a quick trip to the pound later… 

And later, when the moon has 

wandered a long way,

As the night wanes on, laughter and drinks spill in between the two of you. Fragrant kisses escape through your lips and find sanctuary in his own. The clock’s hands have long since passed midnight and it finds the two of you stumbling through the empty streets of Yokohama, hand in hand. 

Your sole watcher is the moon and it shines down on you in an eloquent delight. Chuuya’s hand is warm in yours. His skin is flushed pink and oddly enough, tonight he’s simply tipsy. He remarks on your curious expression before pressing a kiss to your temple. 

“You’re warm,” he murmurs, leaning closer to you. 

“So are you.”

He smiles, and it’s the type of smile that’s eternal and utterly, desperately made just for you. And then comes the soft sprinkle of twilight rain. It tickles your cheek, tracing soft sensations on your skin. Chuuya takes note of it as well, briefly looking up at the sky. 

then we’ll walk about the dream

that we love, you and I.

The sprinkle becomes a gentle shower and the two of you take shelter under a striped awning. Chuuya drapes his coat over your shoulders without a second thought and you find yourself wrapped all the way back up in that sandalwood and familiar scent. 

“Didn’t think it would rain tonight.”

He looks up at the tearful skies before his eyes appear to light up with an idea. He offers a hand towards you and without question you take it. Your hand slots perfectly in his and a light feeling overwhelms your body. A gentle red aura surrounds the two of you and just like that, the rain slides right off you and down to the graying pavement. 

“How convenient.” 

Chuuya chuckles, squeezing your hand just a bit tighter. “I find it pretty convenient, yeah.”

Silence trickles between the two of you. Despite the chilly rainy atmosphere, there's a peculiar warmth in your chest. It radiates from the hand in your own as you continue your journey home.

Ég veit þú kemur í kvöld til mín

þótt kve��jan væri stutt í gær.

"Chuuya? Is there anything else you really want for your birthday?"

He takes a moment. It's a little adorable to see how seriously he takes the question. And even then, you can't help but admire just how he scrunches up his expression to think.

Then, his eyes soften and he seems to have a little 'eureka' moment. But he doesn't say it out loud just yet. Instead, he stops his steps, leaning over to you to steal a kiss from your lips.

Once again, all you can feel is this radiant warmth.

He tastes like red wine and rain and it's somehow so addicting. His hands find purchase around your waist and now it's just the sound of the rain pitter-pattering against the streets.

As you pull away, finding the moment to catch your breath and stare at him in mild confusion, he looks rather proud of himself.

"What was that for?"

A chuckle escapes his lips and your heart leaps and bounds as his answer tumbles out after.

"That was what I wanted."

Ég trúi ekki á orðin þín,

ef annað segja stjörnur tvær. 

Taglist: @todorokichills @alittlesimp @greenshirtimagines @darlinqserenity @nameless-shrimp @whorefordazai @requiem626k @kruven @nonsense-corner @kiyokoxd @jessbeinme15 @starglow-xx @shadyteacup @scul-pted @kuraxmasha @yochicoz @pompompurin1028 @trashykawahq @swrdemon @life-sus @foolishestchildofchilds @fyodorscello @planetxiao @dazaiaiko @chuuyasboots @allisonlol @questioningmyownexistence @sebtomm @nullified-kiss @nathansside @cuteflowers-101 @sigmafied @boombboi @scarletta-ruan @skgch @daz8i @httpsobi @dazaiscum @thekaylahub @luciferspen @dazaisfavgf @alice0blog @irethepotato @monastary @kageyama-i-want-tobiors @disa-ster @mastering-procrastinating @wonpielle @ay-chuu @killmewithafic @aestellia @goldenglow149

[pilferingapples]

   ah that bit in every Romanticist bio where we gotta get the who's who as the author sees it (all this is from the Fourth Musketeer)

At the Café de Paris, on the boulevard, Alexander breathed the air of the great world. There the celebrities of journalism, literature, and dandyism met.

...this gets long

That man with the warlike hat and blinking eyes' is Nestor Roqueplan who has now left his garret, his washbasin-clock and his pistols-candelabra for the comfortable offices of the Figaro.

OK was this before/after/during its time as an anti-Romanticist paper??

Next him is Jules Janin, who looks comfortably rotund but thinks only of snapping at his neighbor, and who will later fight a duel with Dumas about a wretched question of dramatic criticism.

JULES JANIN DUELED ALEX DUMAS?? ...JULES JANIN DUELES ALEX DUMAS AND LIVED?!?

That fellow by way of being a gentleman, dressed with the correctness of an English lord in a blue coat with gold buttons, a yellow waistcoat, and pearl-gray trousers, is the husband of Marie Dorval, Merle, one of the legitimist party, an epicure and an authority on gastronomy.

..wait, isn't that outfit a Werther cosplay? Am I getting the colors wrong?

. . Over at the long table, orating in a high voice, with his face awkwardly swathed in an enormous neckcloth to hide certain unpleasant scars, is Veron, nicknamed the Prince of Wales, actually the manager of the Revue de Paris, who pays Dumas royally, at least for the time being. With his high color, his greedy lips that look as if they were smeared with jam, and his gluttonous eyes, he seems at once an abbot of former times and a comedy valet.

This guy is way more important than you'd guess by how little he shows up in histories! Also he got his start in patent medicine, which is really jumping out at me post-Blue Castle read!

     That tall, thin, dark man, with hair cut brush-shaped and a prominent nose, wearing a velvet caftan and a cap lined with martin fur, is Adolphe de Leuven, librettist of the Postillon de Lonjumeau, who launched Alexander. By his side, flaunting a magnificent kidskin waistcoat and whirling his rhinoceros cane, is handsome Roger de Beauvoir, with a mop of curly black hair, the only one of Alexander's friends who is an aristocrat of wealth-Beauvoir who entertains six hundred people at the Hôtel de Pimodan, and who has just challenged Balzac for accusing him of being named neither Roger nor Beauvoir. Although Balzac took the trouble to send him "forty pages of excuses," the dandy will listen to nothing and proclaims: "I scorn M. de Balzac's prose, I want only his skin!"

holy shit Balzac you messed up??

     Here is Eugène Sue, very smart in his sea-green coat, with a rather vulgar turn of the nose that detracts from his good looks. Last, simpler and jollier than the rest, is that good fellow Méry who passes for a librarian at Marseilles, but who is always off on a lark to Paris; an amazing improviser who can compose correctly an act of a classical tragedy within two hours, and in the drawing-rooms describe the tortures of hell so vividly that the ladies beg for mercy.

Fun new party game: Describe the tortures of hell!

     Near these gentlemen, but on a lower plane, the madmen appear. "He who was Gannot" and has made himself God under the name Mapah, is a fop and a billiard player now fallen on evil days who sends out manifestos signed "By Our Apostolic Ruin."

The Mahpah is one of the wildest ...visionaries? religious ...somethings? movement leaders? of the time, love seeing him get mentioned (Wiki) (Nonbinary wiki)

Jean Journet, called the Apostle, goes about dressed as a begging friar and sells his verses unfailingly entitled "Songs" or "Cries."

...I have no idea who this is . Sounds like he's coping with poverty very artistishly.

Poor Petrus Borel imagines himself to be a wolf; at his house Alexander has eaten cream from a skull. . . .

excuse you he never said he was a wolf he said he was a werewolf and no one actually disagreed also man,you serve ice cream in skulls ONE time...

         ...you might see (Dumas) in the rue Grange-Batelière, in the salon of the dancer Marie Taglioni, "the sylph of sylphs," or at Delphine de Girardin's on the days when she recited her poems. But Alexander always grew sentimental near "the Muse" and asked her to receive him in private. "I love you," he said, "with an affection too selfish to share you with the world." Then, when they were alone together, she would interrupt him with questions about dramatic art. "Do tell me how one writes for the theater?" Dumas laughed at what he called "the naïveté of genius."      He was attractive to women, there was no doubt of that, even to the most distrustful of them. When Sainte-Beuve, who was fond of playing the rôle of intermediary, proposed to introduce Alfred de Musset to George Sand, she answered: "I don't want you to bring Alfred de Musset. He's too much of a dandy, we should never get along together. . . . Instead of him, do bring Alexander Dumas, in whose art I have found a soul, exclusive of his talent." Alexander came and Sand took a great liking to him.

Wow, imagine if George Sand had ever hung out with Musset What a disaster that would have been huh in that alternate world ><

[kaurwreck]

For the song ask game!!! I hope when you shuffle for this ask you get chuuya's character song or wake up call from the dead apple ost or something equally gay

full disclosure: with some semi-rare exceptions, I don't usually add OST or character songs to my playlists because part of why i make character playlists is to tease out my understanding of their characterizations and dynamics by extrapolating my understanding and applying it to noncanonical material. for playlists that are explicitly about a specific dynamic, i also generally avoid single-character songs. every song has to relate to who they are relative to the other character(s) or their relationship with the other character(s).

(i do love bsd's ost and anime sound design though, it's bop after bop)

okay for the ask game!!!!

Real Love Song, Nothing But Thieves

This is a love song, real love Dirty rip out the whole of your soul love I'll hate myself for days love Sitting all alone and listening to Nick Cave love ... This is a dark song, real dark Feral tear off your skin to the bone dark I’ll drink myself to death dark Do anything to feel your breath on my neck dark ... This is a sad song, so sad Aching like it's more than I can take sad I cried so hard I died sad Losing all that's making me human inside sad

in the timeline of their relationship, this song exists in the interim between dazai leaving the port mafia and the guild arc. i fully believe dazai fell first, fell hard, and fell semi-gleefully, but when he left the port mafia, he wanted to leave. his aches and traumas around mori and who he was then are tangled and messy, evidenced by the extent to which the port mafia makes him emotionally erratic and passively self-contradictory (the image he projects starts to glitch as his sincerity and uncertainty trip over themselves) during the guild arc. that suggests to me he hasn't fully processed and struggles to reconcile what was good and golden about his time in the port mafia (including chuuya) with his prey animal fear of it and his inability to become someone other than himself.

from his perspective, he shouldn't be having this problem. he fucking ditched the port mafia; he went no-contact, off the grid, full ego death and death of his prior self. it's something he's used to; it's what he seemed to have done when he found mori. dazai is comfortable ripping out parts of himself and leaving them behind.

however, he can't do it this time. he tried, he really, really tried. but he couldn't. he couldn't let go of who and what he loved in the port mafia, and chuuya brings that into sharp relief. dazai couldn't just leave without first telling chuuya (by setting his car on fire), couldn't just disappear without some assurance to chuuya that he'd gone on his own, by sending a message only chuuya could understand (setting his car on fire). (chuuya says "that was you?!" when dazai references it later, but the feigned ignorance is part of their intricate rituals; how else would chuuya know to open the 1889 Petrus.)

(the omake dazai in which chuuya drunk dials dazai is especially damning: he kept the cellphone he had in the port mafia. not only that, he kept the same number, and he kept it on and charged. he got a new one too, as he tells hirotsu, sure. but he didn't get rid of the old one, and he didn't even turn it off. because, after all, what if chuuya called him?)

and then, of course, as soon as there's the slightest excuse to spill his past into his present (and now that he feels almost secure enough to do so), he can't help but go see chuuya. he didn't need to get captured to get the info he wanted on atsushi's bounty. he wanted to see him. he's wanted to see him for four years, he's thought about him every day, he misses him and his reactivity and who he is and he's both very aware of it and sooooooo mad about it.

i fully believe dazai when he tells chuuya, "I hate everything about you too." because dazai is very self aware, he's fully clocked his inability to let chuuya go. chuuya's roots in him are inextricable and dazai loves him with a ferocity that he doesn't completely believe people can feel or reciprocate, and he hates it because it's exposing and vulnerable and makes him feel like raw meat instead of an intangible, untouchable anomaly. (i.e., human, it makes him feel human, and he can't trust that feeling because he's also convinced humans can't actually love (not with any depth) least of all reciprocate his love, creating a paradoxical spiral that could be resolved if he admitted humans can in fact love how he loves, and they can even love him like that too, indicating that he is also human. but. the mental diseases). he loves everything about chuuya, and because of that, he hates everything about him too.

(whenever love and hate are this entangled, it reminds me of what aphrodite says to helen in the iliad: ‘Wretched girl, do not tease me lest in anger I forsake you and grow to hate you as much as now I terribly love you, lest I encompass you in hard hate, caught between both sides, Danaans and Trojans alike, and you wretchedly perish.’)

Can I sing this to you? Got a thing about you And it won't go away, no It won't go away It won’t go away ... This is a love song, so what? Did it slide into your heart? I guess not I still want your love a whole lot Have you heard a better song? Oh, I hope not ... Can I sing this to you? Got a thing about you And it won't go away It won't go away And I just came to say That it won’t go away It won’t go away

so, dazai loves chuuya and hates him for how much he can't help but love him. but what's so special about the dazai we're introduced to, the current dazai, is how he's beginning to succumb to his love. his attachments to others were a threat, but repeatedly in bsd, he gingerly prods that threat, tentatively hoping it's a promise too. and repeatedly in bsd, he is assured that it is.

it's why he can flit back to tease chuuya, and why it didn't take much at all for him to abandon any attempt to separate who he is from his attachments in the port mafia. he came to chuuya and all but spilled his guts to say that it won't go away. that he wanted to see him, that he can't stop thinking about him, that he won't let chuuya rest either because he can't help it, and that he's stopped trying. so what?

(and no, he can't sing it to chuuya quite so explicitly, he knows what will coax chuuya and what will make chuuya violently demur; it took five flags holding chuuya at proverbial gunpoint to restrain him enough to affirm their affection for him overtly without getting slung through multiple concrete buildings.)

for me, this song encompasses a critical juncture in dazai's growth, the moment dazai began to yield to the anguish of adoring chuuya even though that meant yielding, also, to the reality that he was still himself, even after shedding his prior skin.

[peridotglimmer]

people i want to get to know better <3

tagged by @emily-prentits!

last song: Krystyl - Circles

favourite colour: pastels, but mainly pink.

currently watching: I'm not really following any shows right now. I watch dogdog on YouTube? and currently my grandfather is watching the football match between the Netherlands and Germany. Oh, I follow the opera competition show Aria on the Dutch channel NPO.

last movie: uhh I rarely watch movies. I think it was A Little Chaos (2014).

sweet/savoury/spicy: savoury. I have white girl spice tolerance.

current obsessions: I can feel myself drifting back towards Bridget Westfall, but right now it's Addison Montgomery still, with Diana Burnwood and ZombieCleo in the background.

relationship status: thankfully, single.

last thing i googled: "A Little Chaos Movie" because I wasn't sure on the title. Before that, "PKN Petrus".

tagging: @electricbluebutterflies @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels @mistchievous and anyone who would like to do it? I've done 4 tagging games in a row my brain has forgotten everyone I know.

[kanonavi]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

I was tagged by @hua-fei-hua, thank you much <3

~

How many fics do you have on AO3?

30, currently. I've had a few more in the past that I've since orphaned, and most of my stuff from old fandoms is archive-locked, but that's the total number.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

142,199

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently just Genshin Impact, though I've had a couple ideas for other fandoms that get to stay in the ideas box because I'm simply too busy for them. In the past the fandoms I've written most substantially for were Noragami, BSD, and Persona 5, and there are a few other random ones in there too.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

When Suikou Met a Little Bird (Genshin) - 287

The Nighttime Routine (BSD) - 257

The Petrus Will Taste Less Bitter (BSD) - 252

We'll Talk the Stars Down from the Sky and I'll Not Forget the Chaos in Your Eyes (Genshin) - 217

This Wine Pairs Best With Your Love (BSD) - 187

Considering that I'm not really attached to BSD anymore, it makes me so happy that one of my xiaoven fics has actually managed to top this list. (Also, another one of my xv fics, A Brief Respite from Lantern's Light, is a close 6th with 183 kudos, so if anyone wants to go drop a few kudos on it to get it back in the top 5........... jkjk lolol)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I used to not respond to comments because I was shy and was never really brought up in fandom to know how to interact with other community members without feeling awkward. But now I try to respond to every comment I get, because I know I always get serotonin when authors reply to my comments, so I'd like to hope that I can give that feeling back to others.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

The only fic I've ever written that had MCD was a BNHA fic I wrote based on the song Ghost Rule by Deco*27, so I'd say that one (but please don't go read it that fic is so old agh). I prefer happy endings, so I don't write stuff like that very much.

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of my fics don't have particularly high stakes imo, so it's a little hard to compare in this regard. If I interpret this as the most hopeful ending though, I'd say either Disambiguation, the Persona 5 fic I wrote for the 2020 Goro Big Bang, or The Petrus Will Taste Less Bitter.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Thankfully, no. I've gotten a couple of comments that offered unwanted constructive criticism or sort of pedantic corrections, and there was one person who commented on the collab fic I'm writing asking my co-author when she would update another one of her fics, which sucked. Largely though, people have been very kind about my fics, which means the world to me <3

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I have written smut before, but only for fun so none of it has ever been posted. I do hope to write some in the future though, so I'll leave what it's about as a surprise ;)

10. Do you write crossovers? If so, what's the craziest one you've ever written?

I'm not a big fan of crossovers, so I've never written one. I have written a fusion au of BSD and Persona though, which was pretty fun.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope, I've never hit it that big lol

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! I'm currently co-writing Talk the Stars with my lovely friend Miki, and I do also have a BNHA crack fic writing roulette that I wrote with a group of fandom friends waaaaay back in the day.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

There hasn't been a ship of mine that I would say has proved itself entirely timeless yet, but as of now my favorite ship is still xiaoven (Xiao/Venti) from Genshin Impact. If we ask AO3 though my most written for ship is still (unfortunately) soukoku (Osamu Dazai/Chuuya Nakahara) from BSD.

15. What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

My only current wip is Talk the Stars, and I want to remain optimistic about it, so take my entire box of ideas that I want to write but may never get to instead!

16. What are your writing strengths?

I've been complimented on my characterization in the past, which is always an incredible honor!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Actually writing- Joking, I'm joking! I feel like I've always struggled with the minute descriptions that go between dialogue. Like I'm good at dialogue and I can describe things fine when no one's talking, but I can struggle with the little movements and facial expressions that go between.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I don't mind single words or little phrases, I know I've attempted (to a questionable amount of success tbh) to use German pet names in Venti's dialogue, but they never really sound right, probably because I don't speak German and don't understand proper usage. The one place I really object is where people will write entire sentences in a foreign language in the fic and then not provide a translation even in the author's note, which I have encountered and is quite annoying.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

My first fic on AO3 was a little one-shot for Kagerou Daze!

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Call it recency bias, but my newest fic, A Mora for the Bard, Held Between Your Lips, is one of the best things I've ever posted imo. I put a lot into it, and I think the end product speaks to that. I don't think it'll be my favorite forever, of course, but for now it holds a special place in my heart

~

Tagging: @radellama, @stardustdiiving, @morkiiimoo, @mango-jpeg, @ghostofdiamonds

[snakeplantships]

Tag nine (9) people you'd like to know better!

@beskarfrog tagged me

Last song: Handel recorder sonatas, because that's the kind of nerd I am

Currently reading: A few things to get ready for the next semester, and also The Christian Imagination: Theology and the Origins of Race. Also loving a translation of the Apocryphal Gospels by Bart D. Ehrman. @beskarfrog I desperately want to hear more about this terrible "theoretic-practical theology vol 2" by petrus van mastricht lol

Fanfic-wise, I've been reading all the submissions (ha!) for the Sub Anakin Fest over the last day. And just read the new chapter of Redolent of You by @himboskywalker

Currently watching: Slowly making my way through the Clone Wars. Recently saw the 2021 Dune (finally, I was putting it off because I was afraid it was going to suck. I fucking love Dune), and I really liked it.

Current obsession: Star Wars primarily (OT, Prequels, the Mandalorian), but always up for conversations about Star Trek: TOS, Lord of the Rings, and weird religious subjects of all kinds.

People I’d like to know better (if you've already been tagged, ignore this freely and happily).

@moncuries @veelawings @veradragonjedi @urgirl415 @knivash @misovega @firealder2005 @thecrimsondandelion @kamsspice

[lafcadiosadventures]

Madame Putiphar Readalong. Book Two, Chapter XXII:

The banality of Evil

detail from James Gillroy's A Voluptuary Under the Horrors of Digestion

From Villepastour’s Castle to Putiphar’s lair we go. Patrick jumps to and fro like a pawn in a board game. No time to catch his breath from the intensity he just endured at Gave’s, he is already on his knees, kissing the hem of Putiphar dress, once again ready to kiss more of her, in order to get her not to deport his undeserving friend Fitz-Harris, who Putiphar affirms, should be more than happy to be set free (let us bear in mind that the man, despite his many flaws, had only sang a stupid song) He gives her what she wants. He needs all the powerful friends he can get (is he thinking also of asking her help in securing his position on the musketeers/clearing his slate?). The chapter is for now, almost a perfect refelection of Chapter XIX, but it skillfully lets reader expectations down. Those expecting another eroticosymbolist scene between Patrick and Putiphar, with the poetry of the kiss and Patrick’s both skilled and naif manipulation, will be disappointed: we are given something diametrically opposed to that. Farce.

Madame Putiphar is in Petrus eyes, the de facto queen of France. As Patrick comes to his appointment, ministers are leaving after a meeting with her, her desk full of maps, plans, treaties, etc. What is the actual king of France doing? Cooking.

The ridiculousness of the situation is evident. The man who is supposed to be the most powerful in France sends his mistress to do his work while he’s all messy, dressed as a cook (a typically femenine and proletarian occupation, even if cuisine was Alexandre Dumas’ hobby, he was seen as super extravagant for cooking for his guests)(If inversion of gender roles seem to be completely positive when it’s Debby and Patrick having qualities traditionally thought of as pertaining to the opposite gender, or the narrator remarkably stating the feminine education has only improved Patrick, the inversion is completely ridiculous and negative here)

After Pharaon’s farcical intervention (calling out for his beloved Pompon, dressed as a cook, not at all sure if the political council was over yet, not at all surprised at assuming Pompadour is with a lover, delighted at the prospect of her trying his eggs, proud at his subjects revering and recognizing him even while dressed as a kitchen boy (“emasculated” and de-ennobled too) we get not only a parody of the King, but a high parody of Patrick (we are not used to see the narrator mock his protagonists. But, just look at this:

“As soon as Patrick was outside, thick tears ran from his eyelids! sensitive and great, he had been shaken all the way to his entrails, seeing what had been done to his King.  And his heart broke, and his tears doubled, when as he crossed a gallery adorned with paintings, his eyes met Louis IX and Charlemagne!” (tr. via @sainteverge ) )

Patrick seems to embody here a parody of a belief many contemporary to Borel royalists held: that the olde monarchies were a lost golden age, and that monarchy fell because of bad execution (basically what Janin says in his review, defending la Pompadour from Borel’s “attack” only to condemn Louis XV, claiming the people didn’t like monarchy because it wasn’t done right to them!)(there is a right way to do monarchy according to those guys, you just have to look at people like Louis XIV, a big fave who Borel doesn’t mention, Charlemagne, and I guess Louis IX)

However, even if the narrator had not mocked Patrick before, he had always had elements of a Candide/Justine type of character. He’s the naif hero who still believes in the world as a lawful place, that the laws of the status quo exist for the greater good (despite hating imperial England’s domain of Ireland) still believes in the natural good of the crown and the church, only to be brutally disillusioned.

But back to the King and his de facto Queen. These are the people who manage the fates of an entire nation? This is how much attention they pay to matter of the state??? This are the super-villains who could snap the lives of our heroes out just like that if they wanted to? As in other romantic novels (can’t help of thinking of the Vautrin novels, where his mental and physical strength can do very little -on occasion!!- against the more inept and gray employees of the state who are his opponents) the personal qualities of the heroes can do very little against social roles, and sometimes their opponents are far less than them, and yet they will win. Patrick is an epic poem of a main character both in his qualities and his appearance. And his opponents are so terribly prosaic. So banal. So base. Completely devoid of poetry. They live to eat and fuck, and avoid work (Pompadour seems more serious about handling the state to be fair). And yet they are antagonists not really because of any personal qualities, they are as regular and vulgar as can be. But they wield tremendous amount of undeserved, unearned power, in louis’ case he only had to be born, and Pompon is the fruit of royal favoritism. Having them be like this really brings the point home -whether Borel agrees or not with the idea that the monarchies of old were better- that this isn’t about a single bad king, this is about power being inherited by people who have no calling/ability or interest to govern. And this prosaic couple can and will crush the lives of better people than themselves.

[friendshipgun]

9 people you want to know better!

thanks for tagging me @thestayathomedragon !!

last song i listened to: uh, well the last song i remember listening to was Everything Everything's Only As Good As My God which isn't my favorite of theirs but it's off my fave of their albums lol.

currently watching: nothing, i don't really watch much of anything anymore, mostly bc it's hard for me to just sit down and watch something without feeling guilty/like i need to be working on like three other things. but a month or so back i started rewatching In the Flesh so maybe that counts? do also intend to force myself to sit down and watch Nimona at some point.

currently reading: a lot lmao. been slowly working my way through Merlin Sheldrake's Entangled Life, which is a very readable intro to fungi written by Cosmo Sheldrake's (the musical artist's) brother. they wrote a theme song for the book together and everything. also in the middle of Ann Leckie's Ancillary Sword and rereading Maria McCann's As Meat Loves Salt and Dave Duncan's Sky of Swords (for funsies), and Elaine Scarry's The Body in Pain (for my dissertation). but also about 3/4s of the way through rereading this Loki-centric fic which is VERY GOOD.

current obsession: still stuck on Resident Evil and wintersberg lol. it is likely i'll be here forever. was also really getting into Greedfall (Petrus!!!!!) tho, i have Fic Ideas and everything.

tagging (no pressure tho, just if u feel like it c:) - @macgyvertape @mintymycelia @butterbee @thebisexualmandalorian @wisenwild @akianqel @moss-tea @tvversionperson @underlockv

[macabremayhem]

The role of music in «Nec Deus Intersit»

Our story begins with a scene of the concert, held by a mysterious unnamed singer. I — the author of the story, Lunatic Sun — have decided to leave this character nameless. The music is the most important thing here. But the singer has two very specific, well-defined prototypes, and the music isn't fictional either. Let me tell you a story about it.

There was a 2.000 word limitation for each story, so I needed to cut all the classical melodies descriptions short. I imagined that during the concert the singer would start with some lyrics at first, and then the orchestra would join him.

The first chapter of «Nec Deus Intersit» is dedicated to the memory of Klaus Nomi. I also added special thanks for the inspiration and gratitude to Jakub Józef Orliński. You may guess that these two personas and their voices are interwoven in the image of the fictional singer. I’ve wanted to pay tribute to the talents of both of them for a long time.

Klaus Nomi is noted to have a very tragic story and a huge talent. I'd love to think that in a world of the Arcana he would be perceived as a magnificent mysterious man, just like he was in his real life. I believe his talent was beloved even by such a demanding and old creature with an excellent taste in arts as Valdemar.

N.B.: I'm absolutely sure that Valdemar is completely charmed by the music. There is a mention of them singing as they leave the Dungeons in the Julian’s route.

If you'd like to learn more about Klaus Nomi's recordings and learn his story, you can visit his official channel or watch the documentary «The Nomi Song» (2004) by Andrew Horn.

Jakub Józef Orliński (Polish opera singer, countertenor) amazes with his vocal skills. Just like Klaus Nomi, he has a strong part of drama in his singing. You can find his official YouTube channel here.

***

And now let’s have a look at the music mentioned in the scenes, in the order of its appearance.

N.B.: I believe that Julian (looking to the Heartsong festival as a canon) with all his love for the opera wouldn't be able to stay untouched by this music.

Vivaldi: Il Giustino, RV 717, Act 1: "Vedrò con mio diletto" (Anastasis)

In my humble opinion, this particular performance of this Vivaldi’s aria is truly unsurpassed. Jakub Józef Orliński has a really strong emotional voice, and even if you are not familiar with the Italian language, there would be no language barrier at all. This is what I call a fabulous drama.

Vivaldi: Le quattro stagioni, Concerto No. 4 in F minor, Op. 8, RV 297, "Winter" (L'inverno): Allegro non molto

The second piece is «Allegro non molto» from Vivaldi’s group of violin concertos «Four seasons». Surely it has been performed numerous times before, but my heart belongs to Anne-Sophie Mutter due to her energy and agility. In her version you can feel all the expressiveness Vivaldi put into his work. In my perception of the «Nec Deus Intersit» story this masterpiece should sound just like that.

Henry Purcell: King Arthur, Act 3, Scene 2. "What Power Art Thou?" (The Cold Song)

Let’s have a look at the piece that sounded after the intermission and that excited Julian so much.

It's «The Cold Song» from the semi-opera «King Arthur» by Henry Purcell. The Cold Genius sings this aria when his eternal peace is disturbed by Cupid.

It was Klaus Nomi who made this song — originally performed by basso voices — so popular with the countertenors. Countertenors, in my humble opinion, added more drama to this song. Moreover, it made it possible to rethink the image of the Cold incarnation itself — instead of the ancient elder, as it was in the opera, there is an ancient, immortal and sexless being who rejects this world and prefers eternal sleep in the ice.

Here you can find a revolutionary performance by Klaus Nomi (particularly dramatic if you know his story).

And here is a performance by Jakub Józef Orliński.

Hasse: Oratorio Sacro in Due Parti: Sanctus Petrus et Sancta Maria Magdalena. "Mea tormenta, properate"

Furthermore, in the next chapter Valdemar mentions the aria «Mea tormenta, properate» from the oratorio "Sanctus Petrus et Sancta Maria Magdalena" by Johann Adolph Hasse. Here again — a performance by Jakub Józef Orliński.

Valdemar pointed out that the message of this aria suits Julian perfectly. This is not accidental, if you have a look at the text:

Mea tormenta, properate,

Ubi sunt flagella et caedes, ubi sunt flagella et caedes?

Crucem quaero, crucem date

Volo mori, o Deus in te, volo mori, o Deus in te, o Deus in te…

(Translation)

My torments, hurry,

Where are the scourges and their lacerating teeth?

I want to be crucified, crucify me,

I want to die; oh God, in you I want to die.

How would the entire concert sound? Every time I imagine it a little bit differently, especially if I hear the perfect (in my humble opinion) performance of some classical pieces. The concert may include "Adagio from concerto №3 in D minor, BWV 974" and "Sarabande" by George Frederick Handel, "From beyond" and "Death" by Klaus Nomi, "Music for a while" by Henry Purcell. But the works mentioned above are quite special and essential to this story. It was the music which was the main source of inspiration in some ways. So, if someone decides to listen to them, most likely, they will not regret.

I still pay my respects to Klaus Nomi and Jakub Józef Orliński.

art: Chilledoutbeast/LunaticSun (main line/back+colour)

[eahostudiogallery]

Life, still

Armand Pierre Fernandez

::

Robert Bosisio

::

Max Leiva

::

Alexey Kondakov - Song of Angel

::

Petrus Christus - Portrait of a Young Woman

::

Marisol - The Family

::

Daniel Serva - Seguir adiante

::

Gerardo Sacristán Torralba - Campesinos de Haro

::

Sam Spenser - Bloom

::

Lennart Pagel - New York photograph

::

Jiyen Lee - People climbing stairs, China

::

Joe Brainard - Untitled (Portrait of Joe)

::

Raphaelle Peale - Venus Rising From the Sea - A Deception (c. 1822)

::

Henry Moore - Four Grey Sleepers, 1941

::

Sarah Lucas - OOPS!

::

Yinka Shonibare - How To Blow Up Two Heads At Once (Gentlemen)

::

Sean Mundy

::

Sunday: Setting the table

[beskarfrog]

Tag nine (9) people you'd like to know better!

@limnsaber tagged me!

Last song: here's that rainy day, i've got my spotify on shuffle atm, i've been really digging the archer by adam melchor lately tho

Currently reading: for real books, i'm reading theoretic-practical theology vol 2 by petrus van mastricht. its for one of my grad school classes and its the worst books i've ever read lol

for fanfic, i'm reading made for this by tripmcneill on ao3. its legit the longest fic i've ever read and i'm close to halfway through. v cute codywan and general clone stuff

Currently watching: I've just stared the first season of Good Omens (figured i'd finally see what the hype was about) and I'm also starting Leverage: Redemption bc I loved the original Leverage

Current obsession: Star Wars in general, but mostly the prequels and the mandalorian, i'm just here for worldbuilding, ridiculous relationships, and space memes

People I’d like to know better:

@a-weisz @omgahgase @sol-insidious @onimi18 @snakeplantships

[burlveneer-music]

Ese & The Vooduu People - Tainted Love - the two covers on this EP are great, but the real standout is the original “How to Spot a Sociopath”

Ese Okorodudu – Lead vocal (1–5), Lead guitar (1–5), Backing vocals (5), handclaps (5) Jackson Baird – Keyboards (1–5) Indigo Pearce – Bass (2–5) Sheena Ross – Backing vocals (2–5), Handclaps (5) Mawulikplimi Dossavi – Percussion (3–5) Gareth Lockrane – Flute (1) Wilmer Sifontes – Percussion (2, 3) Anna Chai – Saxophone (2) Luca Boscagin – Guitar (2, 3) Jay Phelps – Trumpet (4) Tega Mendes – Vocals (3) Nicole Petrus Barracks – Violin (3) Evie Coplan – Cello (3) Myyora – Backing vocals (5) Toby Corton – Backing vocals (5) Shivone – Backing vocals (5) Kissangwa – Backing vocals (5) Radovan Brtko – Backing vocals (5) Carl Russ-Mohl – Handclaps (5) Q – Percussion sound engineering (5) All songs written by Ese Okorodudu and published by Quadrafon Music Industries Ltd, except "Home Is Where The Hatred Is" (written by Gil Scott-Heron, © Cayman Music, Bienstock Publishing Company, Carlin Music Corp) and "Tainted Love" (written by Edward Cobb © Equinox Music).