#pet/nick name said in a loving tone of voice is so funny to me get a grip loser /aff

[zaacoy]

fluffy fluff freenoodles cuddles for your tmblr tl todahyyyy they are so in love

[hearts4chriss]

Texas baby.

Angry!Boyfriend Chris x Needy Poc! Girlfriend

prompt: while Chris is filming with his brothers and Sam and Colby you send me a bunch of thirsty texts and images to distract him. Fortunately and unfortunately it works but at what cost?

Part 7

Contains: PURE FILTHY SMUT! humiliation, semi-public, balcony sex, ROUGH! CHRIS, degrading, hair pulling, dacryphilia, overstimulation, use of pet names, hair pulling, ass slapping, choking, photography, dirty talk, spanking, heavy aftercare

A/n: THIS IS DEDICATED TO THE AMAZING & TALENTED GIRL @luv4kozume I LOVE U SO MUCH MAMA ( my mother ) THANK YOU SOOO MUCH FOR ALWAYS BEING THERE IM SO GLAD I FOUND U AND IM SO PROUD OF YOU UR ALMOST @2k🤭🤭

Damnit Chris

Chris Matt and nick were here in Texas to film a collab w Sam and colby and he begged me to come along.

But since he left I’ve been feeling soooo horny for him, I haven’t been able to get him alone of course since he’s here for the collab and I wanted him to explore where I’m from ( surprise :) )

But it’s his fault, he’s been doing things in purpose.

The way he’d hug me from behind pressing his boner into my ass, the way he’d “accidently” grab my tit whenever I’d be out with him and his brothers since we got here.

Oh and his little flirty comments,

“Sorry sweetheart, my fault princess, you need something ma?, you look so pretty mama” all his stupid shit now has me wet and I can’t do anything for hours until he gets back

I had an idea. I was gonna make him pay

I knew how Chris felt whenever I teased him in public, which is exactly why I sent it. It would always end in really, really rough sex.

But we were in a hotel so I'm not sure how this would go but since he was filming with Sam and Colby I hope he doesn't get too upset.

Chris Pov

I was with my brothers and sam and colby as I had just seen the last of my girls texts.

My dick pressed achingly against my pants I swore I felt pre-cum in my boxers. those fucking pictures.

And it only got worse as I tried fixing myself when they weren't looking, just the though of her sitting on the hotel bed in a thong and a sheer black robe covering her made me almost nut in my pants.

I could not wait to bend her over the balcony and fuck her so good, let everyone know shes mine.

Throughout the rest of us filming, I began to get angry and even more pissed off with her sending me those.

She had me turned on, for hours, knowing I couldn't do shit about it.

I was gonna ruin that ass the second I got back. She wants to act like a slut? i'll fuck her like one.

1:27am

I was still awake, I had been laying on the bed before I heard the hotel room door open.

“Hey baby how filming.” I said turning around giving him a clear view of my plump breasts through the sheer material along with the thong hugging at my hips he tried to regain focus.

“You think that shits funny? Sending me that while im in public and making me hard hm?” He spoke in almost a growl his hand wrapping around my throat squeezing a bit and I shook my head and squeezed harder.

“N-no I-dont mphm think its funny-“ I choked out and he let out a scoff before releasing his grip.

“Outside, balcony, bend over.” Was what he instructed and I did so removing the robe walking outside as he followed me smacking my ass and I whimpered

“Faster, slut you wanna get fucked so bad I suggest you move quicker.” Chris said with a teasing tone as I scurried outside bending over and resting my arms on the rails the cool breeze hitting my nipples as they hardened.

“You know what's coming now baby?” Chris spoke in almost a baby-like voice rubbing his hands over the curves of my ass.

before I could speak he lays a harsh smack across my ass I jolt forward gripping onto the rail tightly.

“Don't make a sound yeah? Just be a good girl.” He speaks leaving a kiss on my neck before leaving another smack

“Your, smack, such, smack, a, smack, fucking, smack, slut, smack.” Chris said quickly through gritted teeth as I bit my lip from any groans or whimpers, also ignoring the way my pussy throbbed each time he smacked my ass.

“Fuck-“ he says under his breath fumbling with his pants undoing his belt letting his pants fall to the ground kicking them off before sliding down my thong letting his dick slap on my ass spreading the pre-cum a bit.

“You think you deserved to be fucked?” Think you deserve my cock hm? He said waiting for my answer as I tried to form the words he got irritated smacking my ass.

“You better answer me sweetheart, or you won't even get the tip.” Chris said in a mocking tone.

“P-please Chris- I'm sorry I-promise-“ I choke out my words falling out all over the place and he chuckles spreading my legs before forcing all of him inside me.

He normally would give me time to adjust but he was fucking pissed, he immediately began ramming into my pussy balls deep inside me, his hand grasping my shoulder making it easier to thrust.

“O-oh f-fucking shit Chris!” my jaw slack moaning his name loudly almost forgetting we were outside, but it felt so euphoric feeling him so far gone inside me.

“shit ma so fuckin tight on my dick, such a slut.” He grunted continuing to abuse my cunt letting it coat his cock easily sliding in and out, well pounding.

at the pace he was going, I could cum in probably a minute or two, and I knew chris was gonna make me his cum slut for my behaviour just a few hours ago, I was so fucked.

“shit shit- fuck!- feels so fucking good oh shitt!” I screamed biting my lip from my moans bound to has granted us a noise complaint but boy he did not like.

“Open your fucking mouth, you wanted this right? For me to fuck you like the whore you are?” He said smacking my ass again inserting his fingers into my mouth through my lips.

He continued his pace whilst I made a mess on his fingers from how hard and rough he was going I couldn't keep up as I drooled on his fingers, my ass slapping hard and quick on his pelvis allowing his cock to hit my g-spot every thrust, my stomach already gained the familiar sensation.

“Look at that, already about to cum so pathetic baby.” He chuckles removing his fingers from my mouth so he could pull my hair tightly thrusting harder making a clapping senation.

“FUCK im cumming f-fuck-“ cries of his name flew from my parted lips as my cum began dripping down his length allowing his warm thick load to shoot inside me, but he didn't even slow his pace allowing my eyes to shoot up from sensitivity.

“S-sensitive Chris!” I cried out gripping tightly on the balcony rails and feeling my legs already close in before he reached down spreading them apart leaning over to my ear.

“Nu-uh sweetheart, you wanted this remember?” He mocked leaving a lick on the sensitive spot on my neck making my breath hitch like he knew it would letting his cock ram deep inside me as our cum mixed creating a stick sound.

“such a dirty slut for me aren't you.” He sighs deeply allowing his eyes to roll back at the sight of me so fucked out on his cock.

“F-fuck yes yes- such a slut for you Chris-“ I cry out resting my head sideways on the rails and squeezing my eyes shut to let my mind drift away as it clouded it up from how he was fucking the shit out of me.

“Good girl, so fucking good f'me.” Chris's voice dropped an octave as he was so focused on fucking me till I saw stars it felt, thats when, The sticky sounding was replaced by a squelching wet sensation.

“Fuckk chris- I-“ I groaned my legs quivering as I began squirting over his cock and lower stomach, I could've sworn he would have stopped by now but he didn't

“oh god-“ I said feeling my eyes well up with tears as my legs nearly caved in at the overstimulation and he chuckle admiring how my wetness glistened in the faint light of the moon on the balcony.

“Love this fuckin pussy so much, fits so perfectly around me-“ chris moaned his brown locks sticking to his forehead as his arm wrapped around my torso to squeeze my tit making me whimper my legs began to shake a bit.

“come on ma one more, being such a good girl.” He praises his hand reaching down to rub my puffy clit chuckling at the heat of it as I squirmed tears falling down my face from the overwhelming pleasure.

Chris reached over to the hair grabbing phone putting it side ways and recording in front of me.

“Tell everyone how much a whore you were acting baby hm?” He said still thrusting deeply inside me.

“I-fuck- s-such a whore- for y-you-“ I said panting, almost like a dog my tears on my cheeks as I could hardly form a sentence.

Fucked her so good she can barley speak, fucked her dumb with my cock. He chuckled looking at the camera before setting it down as I could barley support my body weight at this point, my orgasm quickly was approaching.

“Oh fuck fuck I-its- so close-“ My toes curled into the ground allowing everything to entirely take over as I couldn't even process what was happening.

“fuck baby- cum, all over this dick.” He groans his teeth grazing over my shoulder as I shutter in his grasp.

“FUCK- C-cumming s-so fucking good-“ I squealed as I began to cream his dick for the 3rd time as he slowed his thrusts just enough so he could finish inside me again before slowly pulling out.

I try and hold my body up for a bit before chris pulls me into him, my chest heaving as my tears stained my face, our cum dripping out of my abused pussy and my body covered in a thin layer of sweat.

“F-fuck Chris-“ I shake against the balcony rails barely holding myself up before Chris rubbed my shoulder placing a kiss.

“Shh I got you baby.” He whispered in a comforting voice gently picking me up bridle style allowing my head to rest on his chest as he carried me to the bathroom allowing a bath to run for me.

He got a warm cloth pushing my legs apart cleaning my inner thighs first since I'd be more sensitive in between.

“You ready? let me know if it's too much okay?” Chris kissed my forehead and I nodded as he cautiously pressed the warm cloth to my heat cleaning me up being careful to not make me wince.

My bath was ready so he held me again placing me in as i sigh leaning against the back of his as He sat behind me.

“Want me to take ur hair out mama?” or do you wanna keep it in.

“T-take it out.” I sigh tiredly and he smiles grabbing the baby scissors.

He was precise and careful taking my weeve out, I made sure to teach him how to do it so he wouldn't cut my hair and he didn't

Once taken out he undid the braids underneath it beginning to givev my scalp a small massage and I rest my head in his hands.

Your hairs gorgeous baby. He says quietly and I look at him and smile.

Eventually he got me out the bath allowing me to dry off with some support, he carried me to our bed.

“Here you go.” chris smiles handing me a pair of panties and one of his T shirts.

“I'll be right back okay?” He says and I nod as he leaves the room and I’m confused but I’m honestly too tired to even think

I put my bonnet on and wait for him

around 5 minutes later chris comes back with two cokes and a bag of takis.

“I know these are your favorite snacks so.” He shrugs handing them to me before taking off his shirt climbing into the bed with me in his grey sweats.

Thank you. I smile at him

“Of course ma, come here.” He says and I get closer to him laying my head on his chest.

“Thank you for taking such good care of me baby.” I say tiredly and he chuckled.

“Oh don't thank me, it’s my job sweetheart to do that and make you feel so good and plus I think we woke everyone up anyway.” He chuckles

“Oh shit- probably.” I shake my head as we both errupted into laughter.

The rest of that night ( 20 minutes )consisted of us watching TV and eating my snacks before I drifted off to sleep 20 minutes later.

“Goodnight gorgeous.”Chris mutters leaving a kiss to my clothed shoulder turning of the lights cuddling me as we fell asleep.

Taglisttt

@mattsleftnipple03 @bernardsleftbootycheek @sturniolopowers @gdsvhtwa @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @worldlxvlys @chrisslut25 @princessbetsy123-blog @mattslolita @guccifrog @blahbel668 @mattsneezing @trickywritters @hearts4chris

@nonamegirlxsturniolo @luvmxtt @theyluv-meee @mattsnymphette @hoesformatt @luv4kozume @kikisturnioloo @itzdarling @pepsiimaxx @babyddolly @iiheartstef @junnniiieee07 @ratatioulle @ast3ro1dzz @sturniolowhore @st7rnioioss @emma4eva @braindead4l @ihearttsyouu @blondiesjailer @kqyslyho3 @sturnsfav @sunsetsturniolos @stqrnstars @dlyansworld @chrisloyalgf @soimightlikeoldmen69 @abbie13sworld @lacysturniolo @sturniol0s @chrissgirlsstuff @leah-loves-lilies @luhsexcbihh @nicksmainbitch

[oitommothetease]

Invisible String (9/?)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female reader (Modern AU)

Word Count: 2k words

You weren't a morning person, hell, you weren’t even a person in the morning. Therefore, when you woke up to two kids playing with your hair and jumping on your bed, you wanted to strangle them or shove them on the floor. But again, you loved those little demons so you just groaned loudly, clearly irritated and you decided to keep your eyes closed, hoping that your ignorance will make them leave you alone. You squeezed your eyes shut and didn't open them until you heard a familiar voice chuckling.

“Carol told me you aren't a morning person, but this-” James didn't finish his sentence, his lips breaking into a cheeky grin, and as much annoyed as you were at his teasing, you kind of thought he looked gorgeous. Who looked so gorgeous this early in the morning? A smile made its way to your face and you instantly wiped it off, feigning offense.

“Carol? You're already on a first-name basis with my sister?”

“Aw, don't worry, doll. I'm just trying to be friendly with your family or should I say my future family as your mother reminded me ten minutes ago,” he pestered, moving towards you to hand you the cup of coffee in his hand. Bucky winked teasingly when you accepted it, and you mumbled a ‘thank you’.

That pet name made your stomach do some somersaults and you didn't trust yourself enough to speak. It's not like the first time he called you ‘doll’, in fact, he had been calling you that the moment you started fake dating. But it was something about the way he said it as if the word was made for you and nobody could say that word unless it wasn't voiced by him for you. He didn't notice the flush in your eyes and even if he did, he didn't mention it.

“That’s it. You’re done hanging out with my family,” you articulated, “You are officially infected.” 

“Don’t be like that, doll. Come on, breakfast’s ready.”

At the age of 18, when you were finally a college girl, you decided that breakfast was a myth created by Satan. When you lived with your parents, the breakfast consisted of extravagant food like pancakes, waffles and fruits. Once you moved away for college, your breakfast shifted to coffee and maybe a toast if you had the time before your first lecture. And the second you were independent, coffee became your boyfriend, keeping you up at night and also, your best friend, keeping you up in the morning without dozing off in classes.

So, sitting again at a dining table with your family and fake boyfriend/boss was very awkward, to say the least. But of course, your sister had the magical ability where she took an awkward silence and converted it into an uncomfortable conversation.

“We hope we didn't wake you up last night. Nick and I tend to get loud sometimes,” Carol joked and you coughed, choking on your food, and James laughed awkwardly. 

James' hand instinctively came to your back, running calming circles with his palm and you shot a deathly glare to your sister. 

“Oh, we know all about that,” James teased, bringing your chair closer to him. Your eyes widened and you whipped your head towards him so quickly that your neck hurt. What was he saying? This man, your boyfriend, fake boyfriend was a completely different person than your boss (not that you were complaining). He was funny, charming, he made you feel comfortable and something else you weren’t ready to point out just yet.

You could see yourself falling for a man like James. No, he is your boss and sort of criminal. Get your shit together, you told yourself.

After the very awkward breakfast, thanks to Carol. Your mother told you to show James around town and you would have said no but that meant you’d have to stay at home with your family, which was worse. So when James accepted your offer to go to your favorite burger place nearby, you were relieved.

“This burger is amazing, but nothing compared to Barry’s,” James stated. 

You nodded your head, chewing the remnant of food in your mouth properly before speaking, “Nothing compares to Sally and her food.”

You liked being with James, everything about him made you want this, the real thing with him, not the whole faux boyfriend play. You wanted him and you were sure that he didn’t. One look at him was sufficient for anyone to know how handsome he was, and how oblivious he was to the waitress ogling him. He didn’t spare her a glance, he was probably used to the attention that he stopped caring about it. Of course, if you weren't overthinking at the moment, you would have noticed that he didn't care about anyone else - well, except you. 

“The waitress was totally checking you out,” you informed James. You were very jealous, but you wouldn't stop your crush on your boss to stop him from living his life. He had already sacrificed a lot for you, you didn't want to cock-block him on top of that.

“No, she wasn’t,” he huffed, looking at you for any sign that this conversation displeased you the way it did him.

“I swear she was,” you said, “You should ask her out. She’s cute.”

 “No, I’m taken.”

“But you’re not taken, James. This isn’t real,” you retorted and it hurt you so much to say. Sometimes you wished you could be a selfish bitch but you couldn’t do that to James. He deserves someone who would cherish and love him, not give him a faux relationship. “You should ask her out.”

 “Do you want me to?” James asked, his voice was laced with desperation that you couldn't understand. Why would he care about your opinion?

Bucky hoped that you would say no, he needed a sign to know that you wanted him too. His tone was despondent because he was hoping that this could be more. He really wanted it to be. But when you said yes, everything came shattering down for him. You didn’t want him and God, he was so frustrated that he could cry. What sick game was the universe playing with him? He felt like a rat stuck in a cage with cheese right outside, in front of him. Even though he was so close to you, you were still out of his reach.

“You know what?,” he pondered, “Now that I think about it maybe I should ask her out?”

“Like right now?” you questioned, taken aback by his sudden and unexpected change in demeanor.

“Yeah!” he cheered enthusiastically, “No time like the present, right? You can get home by yourself?”

He didn’t wait for your answer, already walking back towards the restaurant, and you murmured a ‘yeah’ which he didn’t even notice because he was already jogging towards the burger place.

When you reached home alone, tears welled up in your eyes, and you ran up to the bathroom to avoid stumbling upon your family. Maybe you shouldn't have pushed him, maybe if you didn’t then he wouldn’t have pursued the waitress. He wouldn’t have gone if you didn’t shove him towards the cute waitress. Why were you such a good person?

Your thoughts were brought to a halt with frantic knocks on the door. Instantly, you wiped your eyes and opened up the door to be met with your sister’s kids. Izzy and Alex didn’t give you any time before getting a hold of your hand and rushing you outside to help them set up the trampoline.

Your family was already out there, and you hoped your face didn’t say, ’I've been crying in the bathroom.’ Your sister and her husband were seated on a blanket which was spread out on the grass, sipping wine, and your parents were admiring their grandchildren.

“Auntie Y/N!” Alex exclaimed and Izzy added, “Help us fix the trampoline please.”

You agreed because those two were the only people in the world that considered you their friend without asking for anything in return. Moreover, it was a good distraction, if you stayed in a room thinking about James, then you would probably lose your sanity. So, once you started setting up the trampoline for the kids, it became somewhat fun, and you almost forgot all about James, and how he must be talking to that girl and how that girl must be flirting with him. You hoped he didn’t call her doll, you knew you were being unreasonable and immature, but you couldn’t help yourself.

Izzy and Alex made their way towards their parents and whispered something about you being so in love with James that his absence made you angry.

You ignored them and the way your sister smiled, you were so focused on fitting the trampoline spring that you did not realize someone was standing behind you until two strong hands came around you, taking the spring from your hand and attaching it to the corner. 

You knew it was James, no one would touch your hand so gently, any other man would have snatched the spring from your hold and mansplained it’s process to you. But James wasn’t doing that, he wanted to be near you, to have your attention fully that is why he took the spring from you. He didn’t undermine you. No, he desired you to notice him, the guy who has been trying all weekend to get you to like him. He wanted you to see Bucky, not your boss, James.

You could feel his head looming over your shoulder, you dared to crane your neck in his direction to find him already looking at you with a smile on his face. You were so dazed in his eyes that you didn’t notice that he was wearing a white shirt instead of the one he wore in the morning. You did not notice that he didn’t leave you to get the waitress’s number, instead he got a customized shirt that read 'I heart Y/N'. You only noticed him.

Furthermore, you didn’t care about anything else at the moment, just him. Bucky eyed your lips longer than he should have and leaned a bit towards you; a question. You answered his question by closing the distance between you and crashing your lips with his. His hands engulfed around your waist, flushing your back against his chest and he kissed you feverishly. 

The kids were right.

You were in love, and that love was reciprocated by the man who was holding you like you were his archer and kissing you like you were the source of his last breath. But both of you were too unaware to realize that the other felt the same way.

Everyone could see that, your mother looked over at your father and your sister looked at her husband, smiling, reminiscing the way they fell in love just like you and Bucky. The kids looked at you both with hope, aspiring to have a love like that in their future, the kind they saw in movies and in the couples around them.

What you didn't realize was that there was one other set of eyes watching you from a car in the distance. Rumlow finally found his rival's vulnerability, and he was going to do everything in his power to exploit and eventually kill Bucky’s weakness, his love, you. 

TAGS:  @bananapipedreams​ @akkinda10​ @rivers-rambles21​ @emmabarnes​ @valsworldofcreativity​ @boofy1998​ @marvel-3407​ @mybuck​ @priii​ @coffeebooksandfandom​ @ladydmalfoy​ @shaking-a-jar-of-bees 

[twatshag]

"Can I ask you something?"

♤ In which haikyuu boys ask you personal questions ♤

Pairings: iwaizumi x reader, osamu x reader, kuroo x reader All gn!!

Warnings: mentions of death(not the characters), suggestive topics, mentions of daddy issues, mention of past troubles, insecurities, mentions of exs cheating, crying

Genre: fluff, slightly angsty but still fluffy.

—----------------------------------------------—

A/N: In honour of mental health month I wanted to write this piece to make you guys feel loved by the boys ! You are loved and cared for and as much as I hated hearing it but things WILL get better. Stay strong I want you to fight.- Kira

—----------------------------------------------—

Miya Osamu

You and your boyfriend were cuddling against one another in your bed it was a routine you both loved doing on your free days. Basking in each others warmth while talking about your days and what the future holds.

Osamu's laugh rang through the bedroom walls while he played with your hair. "And then she literally drops her cake right onto my laptop and it freakin' broke it!!" "Ma god angel was tha cake that hard?" "You have no idea how much I wanted to punch her for one, baking a cake that was literally so hard if I ate a rock it would've been softer and two for breaking my freaking laptop !".

Osamu chuckled once again as he kissed your forehead and you frowning because of how can he find the awful events that you've been dealing with all week funny at all.

"There there angel A don't want ya getting forehead wrinkles from frowning too hard ya know." He chuckled while poking your ticklish sides earning a slap on his hand. "Jeez I think I'd literally cry if I ever got them." Osamu smiled against your hairline as the conversation came to a halt maybe this was the right moment to ask what he's been thinking about all week he thought.

"Angel can a ask you something?". You tilted your head to look at him while he gazed right back at you while popping an eyebrow at his question "is your question going to be 'can ya help me get off?' ? Because your answer is no."

Osamu chuckled and rolled his eyes at your so bold statement just a while back in your relationship you'd be blushing profusely if he made any type of suggestive comment wondering what happened to his innocent S/o.

"Nah angel I'm serious here". Noticing his serious features you decided to nod and see what he has to say.

Gulping he decided to ask away. "What made ya believe in love again? Ya know after yer ex had cheated on ya?" Your eyes widened at his sudden question earning a worried panicked look from him. Looking around the room to avoid this awkward situation he put himself into "Y-ya dont hafta answer ya know A- a Just couldn't-" "you."

His eyes met yours with a dumb founded expression you deciding to continue on since there was no backing down now. I mean you always knew that one day he'd ask you about it but it still made you sink a bit when he did.

"I mean sure of course there would be times where you smelled different or something and I'd panic or times you got so many notifications on your phone and i'd let my past get the better of me and snoop but after 3 months of dating, you told me something that just healed everything I've been through."

You smiled at him and he looked back at you with a curious look to what his so called healing words were.

"You told me you loved me. And I know that sounds so stupid" you laughed heavily releasing the lump in your throat.

"But the way you looked at me was like an unspoken promise to never hurt me like he did." You shrugged smiling at him and burying your face against his chest.

Osamu was dumbfounded by your response sure he knew he might be the reason but confirmation doesnt make the love sick smug grin on his face and the warmth rising to it any less effective.

He held you as tight as he can. "God angel ya really know how to get a man flustered say how bout ya help me get o-" "no" "Angelllllllllllll" you scoffed at him and hit his chest. "Shut up and sleep Miya" to which he laughed at the sound of his last name even when you were upset and you addressed him by his last name he can't help but smile at how beautiful it sounded coming from you. "Yer breaking ma heart here angel don't make me take yer cuddling rights." Chuckling as your grip around him tightened and drifting off to sleep together while he played with your hair.

Making mental note to always be the one who heals you forever because you were the one who healed him too and God did he love you so much for everything that you did.

Iwaizumi Hajime

Today was your regular late night drive throughs and talks about your life while stuffing your face with fast food with your beefy athletic trainer boyfriend.

As you brought the sandwich to your mouth and took a big bite you moaned at the heavenly taste earning a chuckle from the green eyed man next to you.

"Can't believe I'm not the one who's making you moan that way but a sandwich."

You rolled your eyes at his snarky comment while stuffing your mouth with the sandwich "shushth up iwa-chanth".

"Jeez who knew romance was dead L/n and I told you stop calling me that and don't speak with a mouth full last time you did you had to clean my car seat" he laughed earning an intensive glare his way from you.

You swallowed and thought about a good come back for a second. "I wasn't the one who threw up in my cup holder was I? Iwaaa-chaaaannnn" making sure to drag the annoying nickname out just to tease him.

He rolled his eyes at you "you're such a brat, doll and you know how I can't deal with spicy food who's fault was that?" You laughed "oh shut up, you loved me for the after care you got Hajime." "I'll think about it."

Smacking his chest lightly as you both laughed into the night.

Should I ask ? I really don't want to pry. I mean it's been weeks since they've told me about it and I dont want them to feel alone maybe I shouldn't ask them iwaizumi thought to himself while staring at the sandwich in his hands. But before he could decide he was snapped back to reality by your voice "not hungry Haji?" Before he could settle on a decision the words have already come out of his mouth.

"Doll can I ask you something?" You raised an eye brow at his sudden serious tone and you nodded "of course, anything haji-baby" feeling the atmosphere turn tense you decided to pull out the favourite nick name card and he smiled nervously.

"Do you miss her?" You felt your heart sink. Your friend had gotten into an accident talking with her boyfriend while driving resulting them in a critical state which lead to them passing away. You smiled weakly.

"Yes I do.." he stared at you worried that he might've crossed a line or broke a boundary but before he could overthink you opened your mouth to speak again.

"But you know, my care taker always told me something that always stuck to me about death. They said Nobody dies before age" he frowned confusingly. "What do you mean?" He asked eager to know what your statement meant.

"It means that when a person passes away they've served their purpose and they accomplished what they wanted to on earth so they go into their next step. A life even better than what they've gotten." You gazed at him smiling of course it hurt, alot but your friend was very successful and very happy when you went to the funeral and walked up to her casket the way she lied there was a peaceful sight. Slight smile on her face despite her body being cold.

As much as it hurt saying good bye you couldn't help but smile at how happy she looked to earn peace of an even better life in the next. Leaving her pain behind her.

Iwaizumi reached to hold your hand thinking he couldn't possibly be more in love how foolish he thought.

"You're really strong you know that?" You laughed heavily squeezing his hand while a few tears slipped out of your eyes. "Its a part of life you know its just it always hurts when they leave but it makes me at ease knowing that something better is out there for them."

You looked up at your boyfriend who was tearing up in front of you exchanging silent smiles and promises to never be sad when anything happens to you both individually because at the end of the day the light at the end of the tunnel is always brighter than the start.

Kissing in the dead of night as a confirmation to what you both were thinking and agreeing to your promise. While he held you in his arms remembering to always make you feel better because even though his job was draining coming home to you and embracing you was something that always, always made him feel better. Hoping that it would be your cure as well.

Kuroo Tetsuro

"Kitten! Come help me with this!" Kuroo whined as he was trying to hang up the drawn portrait of your pet dog on the wall. Today was just a normal lazy day in the kuroo & L/n household. "Tetsu- stop whining can't you see I'm busy here" you rolled your eyes at your 6'2 pouting boyfriend who's suddenly bad at everything he can do alone knowing damn well he just uses it as an excuse to be close to you.

Despite what everyone thought of Kuroo he sure was the clingy type in fact if you got up to the bathroom during the night he'd whine about how you don't love him anymore because you left his arms.

Walking over to you trying to put the portrait into different frames you had placed on the floor deciding which one would look the best on the wall. He crouched down to your level and hugged you from behind while resting his chin on your shoulder.

"Kitten don't use that sassy tone with me I'm still your senpai chibi-chan." You giggled and rolled your eyes at his silly nickname "you know that it's been 5 years since high school right ?" He smirked at you and kissed your neck earning a whimper from you at the warm sensation. "But you're still my chibi-chan" "whatever you say captain"

you smiled at his warmth while sliding the portrait out of the frame you put it in. "Say chibi-chan, why don't you start calling me captain in bed?" You looked at him with the best deadpan expression you could make while he wiggled his eyebrows at you as a way to say 'whatcha think???' "No". You answered back.

you stood up grabbing the frame you thought fit best on the wall and he followed you like a lost puppy "oooohhh come on chibi-chan, how would that hurt? You refused to call me daddy you know!" You laughed at his annoying smug grin and rolled your eyes at his pouty face.

"I'm not calling you captain testu- besides why isn't testu enough for you? Sex is supposed to be intimate why would I call you something that I don't like thinking about." You chuckled,

but he knew better than anyone that your chuckle wasn't because you thought it was funny but because you were hiding the slight pain in your voice.

If you had anything common with kuroo it was that your home wasn't as perfect either. Your father was indeed home and he lived with you guys but if he wasn't it would've probably been for the better. And he knew about that.

"Kitten can I ask you something?" You rolled your eyes thinking this was going to be another bribe for you to call him some nick name during sexual intercourse but decided to play along. "Aye aye captain ask away." Popping the cardboard open to place the portrait inside the decided frame you heard him swallow and he opened his mouth to talk.

"Is it because of him?" You almost dropped the portrait from your hands. Grip hardening on the piece of paper in your hold.

You looked at him sadness reflecting your eyes trying to hide it behind your weak smile. You nodded. "Yeah. It is".

You didn't notice how your hand started shaking becoming angry and over rushed with every negative emotion in your body tears swelling up your eyes not noticing how your boyfriend was already by your side placing the paper you held so tightly on to the side while pulling you in to his chest and relaxing as you softened against him.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked you that." You sniffles against shaking your head. "No it's okay, it's just.." he placed his hand on your head tracing his thumb against your hair lightly something that always soothed you when your sad.

"I just don't want to remember him, You know and I still feel like it's my fault that he's the way he is, maybe if I-" "no."

Kuroo cut you off by lifting your chin up to look at him worry and pain plastered onto his face. How can anyone hurt you he thought.

"It's not your fault kitten, if anything he's the asshole. You didn't deserve him and his shitty behaviour if I was in his place I would've made sure to protect you even from myself."

You laughed while he wiped your tears and you leaned to his touch "you just made this sound gross testu" he chuckled and pulled you into his chest once again allowing you to hear his racing heart that only raced for you.

"guess I'm gross for making my kitten laugh while crying" you giggled wrapping your arms tightly around him, enjoying his warmth and love for a few seconds before mumbling. "Captain sounds nice.." giggling to yourself and suddenly yelping as he picked you up bridal style and kissing your lips making his way to the bedroom

"Tetsu put me down!!! We still didn't hang the portrait yet!!" He chuckled as you squirmed in his hold "nope I'm sure the portrait could wait right now I have to take this new nickname for a test drive" as he closed the door to the bedroom leaving you and your worries behind.

You knew that at the end of the day kuroo would never hurt you. Unless it's in bed but that's beside the point.. he truly loved you and while you laid in his arms that night completely bare he vowed to himself to always protect you. Even if that meant from himself.

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A/N: I hope that you guys enjoyed this piece dedicated to mental health month! Please don't ever doubt your feelings they are valid and you have every right to feel the way you feel thank you all for being the way you guys are ! Much love to everyone! Stay strong

P.S: ILL UPDATE AS SOON AS I GET MY REQUESTS OPEN!!!

- with love kira

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[starlight-writes-stuff]

hello, can i do one of the song request things you wrote about a bit ago? she/her pronouns, with dream, and based on the song 'daisies' by ryan caraveo? also, if you're doing an anon list, can i be 🧿 anon?

welcome 🧿 anon ! i just have to say ,,,,,, this song is immaculate ?? so good ?? will be added to my playlist ?? the concept of this song works perfectly for a fic - i love it so much . thank u for requesting and i really hope u enjoy ((((:

daisies - ryan caraveo

AYO LOOK AT THESE : 2.3k wc , so much fluff ur gonna puke , but nothing other than that . reblogs are always appreciated ! <3

xoxoxo , starlight 

☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ☁  ���

she earned her grades and i finessed mine

but not so obvious, a c minus is just fine //

she planned for college, i schemed and plotted

---

her friends are pretty, my friends are goonies

but maybe it could all work out like in the movies

---

she like daisies, i'm like gloom

without my rain, she couldn't bloom

she need me, i need her, too

                                                     ☁ ☁ ☁

you and clay (or dream, really. everyone in his life called him that except for you; it was a nickname he couldn't seem to rid himself of) couldn’t have been more different- and yet, the sandy blonde boy had managed to work his way into your head and wasn’t planning on leaving anytime soon. every time he touched you, whether it was accidental or on purpose, you felt your entire body go up in hot, white flames. your nervous system seemed to light up around him; even the sound of his voice made your heart skip and stutter. when you thought about him, the world didn’t seem so dark anymore. 

when you moved to florida at the beginning of the semester, you’d made yourself a promise: no boys. no hookups, no flings, no situationships. you’d been hurt too many times, and you weren’t in the market to put yourself back out there. and then you met clay.

the two of you were dead opposites. he lovingly described himself as a stereotypical ‘teenage dirtbag’: a lowlife kid who’d struggled through school and had a shitty home life, but has somehow made it into college. he cheated on all his tests and didn’t do assignments; he’d rather skate all his problems away, surrounded by the pack of slobbering boys he called his friends. his idea of a good time was running from the cops. clay was everything that you weren't- carefree, blissfully clueless, and entirely too calm for his own good. 

your whole life you’d been the ‘good girl’: straight laced and perfectly dressed, an academic superstar and all around teachers pet. you came from a happy middle-class home, and your parents kept up with you in a family groupchat. you’d done just the right amount of  extracurriculars to rise above everyone else in your class, but not enough to make you look pretentious, and spent most of your time volunteering. on the off chance that you had an ounce of spare time, you wouldn’t be caught dead at a house party; no, no, you were practicing piano. 

your friendship made no sense, and yet, here you were.

being clay’s friend meant you were never bored. even while he was living through hell at home, he was funny and sweet and brave. he was the first to get you two into trouble and the one to talk you out of it. he was spontaneous and alive and had a good taste in music. once you started to notice the light he got in his eyes as he flew down hills on his skateboard, the way he laughed so hard his voice would dissolve into silence, or the way he would suck on his straw after getting slurpees, you couldn’t stop. then you started to notice every perfect thing about him and it only made it hurt that much worse when he would cry. you started doing anything and everything you could to protect that light in his eyes, to make sure no more tears would ever fall from them.

but you didn’t want to be clay’s friend anymore- you wanted him, in every sense of the word. you wanted all his time and attention and love and affection. you wanted to be that one that made him smile that stupid, crooked smile of his, and make him laugh until he couldn’t breathe. you wanted clay to look at you the way he looked at life- like a challenge, a puzzle that he wouldn’t stop messing with until it was solved. you wanted to call the lanky, troublemaking boy yours, to take him somewhere where he would never hurt again and love him until he wasn’t broken anymore. against all odds you had fallen for clay, hard, and you didn’t know how you were supposed to get up.

little did you know, clay was feeling the same way. 

                                                     ☁ ☁ ☁

it wasn’t odd for clay to just show up at your dorm. it was pretty common, really. he seemed to pop in more and more these days, sometimes with friends, sometimes without. you’d more or less been adopted by the group of boys; as far as you’d been told, they had all been friends since childhood. growing up together, the clan had earned the name ‘feral boys’- one that you didn’t want to know the backstory behind. as far as you knew, they were all loud and slightly aggressive but overall sweethearts, and they’d taken you under their wing once it had become painfully obvious that you had no other friends. again, it was an odd pairing; clay, george, alex, nick, karl and… you. but it worked, to say the least.

clay didn’t have any of the other guys with him this time, barging into your room unannounced. you’d been trying to get him to knock for forever, but none of your protests had stuck. 

“clay!” you exclaimed, throwing a pillow at him. you were sitting in your bed, typing away at a psych paper that had been plaguing you for days. “what if i had been naked?”

he fell onto your bed, shutting your laptop with one of his long arms. “then it would be my lucky day.”

scoffing, you rolled your eyes at him while you prayed that your flushed face wouldn’t betray you. his answer made blood swoosh in your temples, your heart skipping a beat before lapsing into an upbeat sort of rhythm. “yeah, sure- good to see you too. what do you need?”

the blonde boy grinned up at you. “since when do i need a reason to stop by? you like my company,” he boasted. clay wasn’t wrong; you loved every moment that he was around, even the most mundane ones. something about him made you feel more alive.

“are you working on something important?” he asked, his voice taking on an unusual sort of tone.

you lifted a brow at him- clay’s voice very rarely changed from his confident, over easy tone, so when he did, you were going to call him out. “no,” you mused, drawing the vowel out. “why? you seem weird.”

clay’s face morphed and fluctuated before he pulled a tight smile. “you really don't miss anything, do you?”

“nope,” you said brightly, transferring your laptop to the nightstand by your bed. clay was jumpier than usual, shifting his weight and repositioning himself three times before finally sitting up, leaning against your wall. he bumped his knee against yours and the slight, innocent touch sent butterflies out of your stomach, soaring into your chest.  

“clay, what’s wrong?” you asked, your voice taking on an embarrassingly gentle tone. you realized that he could be having issues at home again and your heart sank- that would explain his odd demeanor. your chest flooded with affection for the boy, your heart achingly soft as you grabbed one of his hands. clay quickly turned your palm over in his, playing with your fingers as he spoke.

“i want to talk to you about something.”

you froze for half a second, swallowing hard. your throat was dry as you opened your mouth to speak again.

“okay. what’s going on?”

biting at his bottom lip, clay’s face flushed with blood. his cheeks took on a rosy sort of pink tone, and he pulled his eyes from yours as he let out a long exhale. he allowed his gaze to settle on the ceiling, tracing the pattern of the old popcorn ceiling with his pupils. 

                                                     ☁ ☁ ☁

you secretly loved moments like this- moments where clay was too preoccupied within his own head to realize that you were staring, studying his face. he was the kind of boy you could only describe as pretty, all high cheekbones and bright eyes framed by long, golden-brown lashes. you stayed like this for a moment longer, drinking him in; you’d be thinking of him like this for weeks. every time you got a chance to look at him like this, you added another mental painting of him to your art gallery. in some paintings, he was surrounded by soft orange light, usually sitting on a curb or the lip of a halfpipe. in others, clay was painted on soft blue tones, shadows reinforcing the hollows of his face. 

there was one common thread in all the mental works of him, though: he was never looking back at you. in your mind, clay would only ever see you as a friend- the slightly odd girl that had fallen in with him and his groupies. you truly believed that he only perceived you in small quantities- only ever seeing you when you made a rather good joke or fed him something. the rest of the time- the majority of the time you two spent together- you thought clay seemed so enamored by his own mind, or that he was was too busy doing something else to pay you any attention.

                                                     ☁ ☁ ☁

clay pulled his mouth to one side, face scrunching up before he dropped your hand, letting it fall on the bed.

“i’ve been thinking about a lot of stuff lately.”

you blinked, then looked back at clay, unsure of what this meant. his whole body seemed to stiffen as you looked over him- he seemed uncomfortable, which never happened. you dropped your gaze to your duvet and busied yourself with tracing over the floral pattern, your mind seemingly exploding with thousands of thoughts per second. you, for the first time in your life, felt strained around clay, and it scared you more than you’d like to quantify.

“oh. what kind of stuff? do you want to… talk about it?”

“yeah. no. not really, but i’m going to make myself do it. this thing- the thing i've been thinking about- if i don't get it out,” he said, stressing the words as if they had some sort of deeper, more intense meaning, “will just… consume me. you know?”

you did, but you weren’t sure if it was in the same way that clay was meaning. “sort of.” clay groaned and tangled his hands in his hair, tugging at the roots before letting his head fall into his palms. he made another frustrated noise then pushed himself up and off of your bed, beginning to pace.

something was glaringly wrong; clay only paced when he couldn’t release in any other way. even so, his pacing was more aggressive than usual, more stomping than stepping. clay was quickly working himself into a hole, and you were watching him spiral. you knew that he would only rile himself up more, past the point of stopping himself now. 

pushing yourself to standing, you grabbed one of clay’s wrists- his skin was hot to the touch and you could feel his heartbeat, strong and erratic, thumping under his skin. 

“clay-” 

his lips were on yours, hot and rough and needy and the slighted bit desperate as he knotted a hand in your hair, the other cupping your jaw. you froze for half a second, shock flooding your system, before kissing clay back even harder. you were entirely overwhelmed and you could feel the sharp spurs of desire cutting through your blood, replacing it with the yearning you’d been suppressing for months. his tongue tangled with yours, quenching the thirst that you’d only been adding to with an ease, and a small whimper escaped your throat. 

clay seemed to realize how hot and heavy things had become in a matter of seconds and pulled away, running a thumb over your lips as he leaned his forehead against yours.

“oh?” he asked, his usual cockiness returning with a force. you weren’t able to form words- much less piece together a whole sentence- so you settled for pressing another kiss to his lips, answering him in the only way you knew how

                                                     ☁ ☁ ☁

the two of you stayed like that for a while, communicating through rough, sugary sweet kisses, hands on hips and chests and necks. after you’d kissed until your lips were sore and you were both out of breath, clay had given you a concerned sort of look.

“was that too much- or too one sided?”

“what? no!”

clay had laughed at the way you’d defended yourself, peppering your face with tender pecks. “so you really do like me, huh?”

“i do. i really do, dream,” you stressed, pressing a kiss to the boys scruffy jaw.

“ew,” he groaned, hitting you with the pillow you’d thrown at him earlier that afternoon. “don’t call me that.”

“why not?”

clay had readjusted, wrapping an arm low around your waist and pulling you to his chest, looking you dead in the eyes. “you’re the only person in my life that calls me clay, you know that? and for some reason, it fits. you and me just… fit. we work. we’re so different that we fit together like a complicated sort of puzzle piece.”

your heart swelled and you looked over clay with pure adoration. “we do seem to work well together.”

“ever since you came into my life, it’s like, i can't function without you. like you’re- you complete me, in a way?”

emotion seemed to drown you, and you pressed another kiss to his lips. “the yin to your yang,” you murmured against his neck, burying  your face in his shirt. 

“i will break up with you if you say that again,” he said, laughing, but you knew it wasn’t true: your story was just beginning.

[fatandnerdy30]

The Itsy Bitsy Spider 30(final)

Well, this is it...I hope it's better than my last fic's ending, and not so rushed. But, 30 chapters..Nothing I've written has been this long before! It's been a wild ride, and with readers like you, I have had the most fun writing this! You've encouraged me so much to keep writing, no matter how bad I thought this was, and how crappy I felt a chapter was. I just want to say thank you! Now, onto other things. I have decided to take a little break with Irondad to plan out my next fic and...my next original! This original won't be G/t, but it will have a supernatural element to it! I won't say anything, but it has to do with wolves lol. So, be on the lookout, okay? I'll be working on My Tiny Pet, and a few other things. And as always, if you liked this chapter, please leave a comment down below! I love each and every one of you, reader, commenter, and favoriter!

"Eyes on the target," Maria said, her deep voice serious in tone. "Permission to fire, sir?" Fury sat at the console, watching the small aircraft. He didn't know if the boy was on that plane, but, he couldn't afford to let Bloom go for any reason. With a sigh, he nodded, turning his head. Maria nodded once. "Fire!" she said loudly into the comm-link in her ear. Seconds later, two missiles were set loose on the plane. One just grazed the side, while the second hit the wing dead on. "Confirmed hit, sir! Permission to fire again?" This time, Fury shook his head. "No, they won't be able to get very far like that." At the moment, the plane started loosing altitude alarmingly fast, and that's when he noticed they hadn't just struck the wing, but the engine as well. "Follow them," he said and sat back to watch. "But, keep a lock on the plane just in case Bloom as something up his sleeve." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tony had been chasing the target for about twenty minutes when Friday's voice broke in. "You have ten minutes of air left, and Nick Fury is on the line." "Well why didn't you tell me that first? Put him through." Fury's face came up on the HUD, serious as always. "Stark...why is your position two hundred feet below the ocean?" "Because I'm hunting Moby Dick, why else? I'm trying to get Bloom before he gets away with one of my kids!" At that Fury smiled, like he knew something Tony didn't, and that pissed him off even more. "What do you want, Fury? I'm kind of busy." "Oh, just to tell you I found Bloom trying to make an escape on a plane thirty miles away from where you are." Tony came to an almost screeching halt, staring at the trail of bubbles. It couldn't be...were they following a dud? The man cursed under his breath. "Rhodey!" he called and the silver suit stopped, looking back. "Tony! Why did  you stop? We're getting close, I can feel it!" "Have you noticed, we've been getting close for the past fifteen minutes....and there's always nothing there. It's like we're following a ghost. Or," he looked around. "Friday, do a scan of the area." "I am detecting multiple devices that are made to make bubbles, boss." "Shit...you were right, Fury. He had us following breadcrumbs. Where are you?" "We're just passed Anacapa...in fact, I think I see where your house used to be." "Very funny...just don't do anything until I get there, Fury...I mean it." He gave the man a glaring look. "Are you giving me orders now? It doesn't work like that, Tony. I do what I want when I want." That didn't sound good to Tony. "Just don't hurt my kid," he pleaded, already breaking the surface and heading up as fast as he could go. "I'll try....I can't promise anything." Then in the background he heard 'permission to fire?' "I have to go." And with that, the line went dead. "Fury!? Fury, if you hurt him, I swear I'll kill you!" He tried calling the man back, but it was like he shut his line down, because didn't ring at all. "Dammit! Rhodey, we have to hurry!" "On it!" Came the colonel's reply and they broke the sound barrier together as they shot towards Fury. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Octavion was about to put the empty needle into seventy-three's abdomen when he felt what he thought was turbulence. Waiting for it to pass, he lifted the needle again and just started drawing out the boy's blood when the explosion shook the aircraft. "What was that!?" he shouted, looking towards the window and seeing nothing but smoke. "What have we hit?" Ward was at the pilot's door, speaking in raised volumes with him. "Well loose them!" "I can't, sir! They have us on lock and we're losing altitude!" "What's wrong?" Bloom shouted, covering the subject with a plastic dome, a hose attached to the top that kept pumping oxygen mixed with anesthesia in to the boy. "Why are we losing altitude?!" "A missile hit the engine!" the pilot yelled over the screaming alarms. The ocean, which had been hundreds of feet below the plane, was now hurtling towards them. "We have to get out of here!" Bloom rushed for the boy, hastily taking off the done and pushing him into the glass cage. "Hurry! Help me get my equipment!" "We don't have time!" Ward rushed for the parachutes, throwing one at Octavion, who dropped the cage, letting it clatter to the floor. "You idiot!" He threw the parachute to the ground and picked up the cage, then the parachute again. "You could have killed him! Then where would my experiments have gone?" He put the pack on and went to the now open door, looking down nervously at the incoming ocean. "What do we do now?" "We jump," Ward said. "What? Me? Jump into the air? No!" He shook his head,  backing away from the door, eyes wide. Ward grabbed the man's arm in a harsh grip and pulled him forward. "Yes, you. Now. JUMP!" He pushed the man from the plane, waiting a few seconds before following. He wasn't sure if there was another parachute for the pilot, and right now he couldn't care less. He was out to save his own hide right now. He checked on Bloom, not surprised to see him clutching to the case like it was a teddy bear and not paying attention to his rip cord. Well, like he'd said. Not his problem. But, it would prove useful to him if he could get the experiment away from Octavion, Ward would be able to able to take it apart and study it. With a sinister look, he pulled his own cord and was pulled up, all the while watching Bloom struggling to find his cord, but it was too late for him. Even if he was able to pull his cord, he would still hit the water too hard and it would be like concrete, snapping any and all vital bones that would be able to power through the waves to keep the man afloat. The only problem was if it was that hard, it would shatter the box. Ward would have to find experiment seventy-three quick so it wouldn't be lost to the waves. As predicted, when the scientist found the cord, by the time he pulled it, there wasn't enough air under the parachute to lift him and he was going too fast. With a crack, Bloom hit the blue calmness of the ocean. He bobbed for a minute with the buoyancy of the cage, but the cracks were too much for the water and the outside shattered, sending the scientist's lifeless body below the serene waves. Too slowly Ward drifted through the air, finally hitting the water hard enough to bruise a few limbs. Looking around, he saw pieces of glass drifting away. Where was the experiment? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I want people in the water now!" Fury yelled as soon as the plane hit the water. "Search and rescue! And remember, your target is small. First to find it, call me immediately. NOW MOVE!" He never yelled, but now he raised his voice enough for the crew to know he meant business. Dozens of SHIELD agents ran past him through the battlecarrier and to the subnautical vehicles held below. "Sir? Is everything all right?" Maria asked, her brows furrowed in concern. "Yes....just something in that plane that I need. I just hope we're able to find it." He wasn't too sure how small Peter was when talking to Bruce, only that he was tiny. A great description on his part. On a second thought, he stood and he pulled out his phone and sent a picture  he'd found after a quick search of the boy's name, to all the underwater subversive agents as he made his way to a boat, Maria following him. He hoped the boy lived, because Fury knew Banner hadn't been fully truthful about the boy, and Fury wanted to meet him in person. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Something wet was touching him, that was how Peter woke. Blinking, he stared up at the blue sky, sun beating down on him. But, something about the sky seemed different. It was almost like he was staring at it without a barrier. Suddenly  he shot up with a start and almost fell off the piece of reinforced glass he was floating on. What happened? The last thing he remembered was being in the cage banging on the glass trying to get free. Now, it seemed like he was out of the clear cage....was he dead? Had Dr. Bloom actually killed him? No, because if he were dead, he'd be on a cloud, not in the ocean, surrounded by millions of miles of blue water. Looking around, he saw the shore wasn't that far...well, to normal sized people anyway. The boy knew he had paddle, he had to find a way to the the shore. He had to get away, and find his way back to safety, to Tony...to his dad. "Okay, Peter....you can do this....." Taking a deep breath and not looking at the clear bottom, the boy used his hands to start paddling. But, he didn't make it too far before a something massive hit the water, causing him and to capsize. In his current state, it was hard for him to tread water, his lung size not enough to keep him afloat. But that didn't matter, for a hand was wrapping wrapping around him. When Ward hit the water, he'd found where the boy was and aimed for the glass he was using as a body board. Hitting the water caused enough waves to flip the glass, and Ward had removed his parachute before it dragged him down. Reaching out a hand, he grabbed the experiment, but instead of bringing him above the waves, Ward held the small thing just under the water. He grinned at the struggles he felt, so insignificant. It made him feel like a god, holding a small baby bird in his palm. The boy's struggles lessened, and the bubbles coming from his mouth increased. He was almost gone! Finally, this tiny being would be his to take apart and discover what secrets he had hidden in its blood! Suddenly, he felt something blunt rest against his head and the man froze. "Raise your hands slowly," a deep voice said into Ward's ear. The man did as he was told, bringing his hands, and the tiny being, above the water. "You're too late," he laughed, the limp form in his hand speaking volumes, when suddenly he heard a gunshot and nothing else as his body slipped beneath the water. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Floating. That was what Peter was doing at the moment. But, there was something persistent hitting him in the chest. What was it? "Breathe kid!" It was a stranger's voice calling to him. Who's was it? Slowly Peter's body came into focus, and through the haze, he saw a man above him, one of his eyes covered by a black eye patch. Peter would have cheered, but he could only cough as air forced itself into his chest, expelling water like a fountain. "Glad you could make it back, Peter." "Who," he gasped. "Who are you?" Salt water did not taste good coming up. "Nick Fury." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tony's mind was was thinking about fifty thousand thoughts at the moment, most of them not good. He thought about what Peter was going through right now, where he was. Was he scared? Was he hurt? All these thoughts just kept repeating themselves over and over, driving the man crazy. "Tony, you need to calm down, man," Rhodey's voice was firm in the comms. "Friday's over here annoying me about your blood pressure." The billionaire smirked at that. "What do you know, I did program her right if she annoys you. Good job, Friday." "Tony, I'm serious. You have to calm down. We'll find Peter and he's going to be fine." He wasn't so sure about that, but he trusted what Rhodey had said in the past, and it turned out to be right. "You're right...I just need to take a few breaths and think about something else." He inhaled deeply, eyes still stuck on the red dot that was Fury's location. "Have you heard from Banner or anyone back at the farm?" "Not yet, but I'm sure that means good things. Hopefully they're just busy getting what they need from the quantum realm, or whatever." Tony could only hope. "Yeah, I'm sure that's it." He just wished they would hurry and call. "Incoming call from Nick Fury. Should I put it throught?" Friday's voice interrupted. "Yeah, or else he's gonna hack my systems and get all pissy." "Damn right I will." The director's face popped up on the HUD. "And after all the trouble I went through to get you a present." Present? "Aww, and I didn't get you anything." "I'll bill you later. We're on route to your location now. Keep heading for us and we'll meet halfway." Tony nodded. "Whatever you say, you're the boss. But, does this mean you-" "Meet first, presents later," Fury had a knowing smile, then ended the call. "Damnit," Tony cursed and sped up, going through the sound barrier like it was butter. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Peter sat shivering on the control panel, curled up on himself as he watched the giant man with the eye patch hang up on Tony. It had been a harrowing adventure, but Peter wanted to just leap into his dad's hands and feel the warmth and safety the man provided. "Here," the man said and dropped something on top of the boy, cloaking him in a world of white. "Tony would kill me if you got sick." Finally he poked his head out and saw it was a white handkerchief. Shivering, he quickly wrapped himself in it, letting out a content noise. "Thank you." "Don't mention it. Now, explain again what happened to you?" The giant leaned back in his chair, crossing his legs and leaning his head on a hand to stare at Peter. Sure the boy had grown used to it by now, but there was something about this man's stare that was disconcerting. Slowly Peter went into the story of how he was turned tiny, putting emphasis on the parts of the story that even he thought were ridiculous, but true. Finally, he began to wind down to how one of Fury's men found him and the shivering finally stopped. "So now, I have to wait for Sean to come and fix me." He smiled at the thought of his friend. "Sean O'Cleary?" The giant then turned in his chair to see a screen, typing in the name. "I have heard of him...but it says here, he's deceased. Died a couple days ago...I'm  sorry." At first it was shock that made the boy go quiet. Sean was... "No," he whispered, head shaking. "No, they wouldn't kill him...he said it himself, he was too valuable...only he knew his research." If he was dead, then how was Dr. Pym going to fix him? "Does it...does it say how?" Fury shook his head and closed the file before Peter could see what was written. "No. The report said he was found in an abandoned laboratory." Big, brown eyes started filling with tears. Peter blinked away the burning sensation, looking away from the giant man. "Thank you," he said lowly. "For telling me." He had lost another friend. True he still had Ned and MJ, but he wouldn't actually have them until he was back to normal. He was going to be stuck as a freak for the rest of his life, destined to stay in a lab to be studied by Dr. Banner until he came up with a cure. Suppressing a sob, he threw the handkerchief over his head to block anyone from seeing him. "Sir, Stark is within radar." "Thank you, Ms. Hill. Keep on course, open the hangar." Peter could tell the giant glanced at him and huddled into his white cave, listening to the giant man chuckle. He wanted Mr. Stark even more now. He needed the man's comfort. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The nanobots weren't even done crawling into his reactor before Tony was storming onto the large heliship. He didn't acknowledge anyone, kept looking straight as he traversed the well known hallways of the airship. Suddenly, he saw something that got his curiosity. Hammer was being marched through the halls of the ship in handcuffs. He had a deep scowl on his face, but when he saw Tony, that's when he started fighting. "I had him in my clutches!" Justin screamed, his face red under the spray on tan. "I almost bested you, the great Tony Stark!" "Apparently he knows you," a guard said, stopping to hold the man still. "Were there any others?" Stark asked, bristling as he stared into Hammer's eyes. "No. The little guy with Fury told us this was the second man with Bloom, and he was also in the car with the one that hit the girl. He is the one who threw the girl into the car, though." Instantly Tony saw red. He stared at the man, moving towards him, fury written on his face. "So, you like taking little girls, huh? Especially my little girl?" He stared at the smirking man for a second before, faster than even he thought he could move, Tony brought his fist up and punched the other in the face. "That was for Morgan. And this," he brought his foot up and landed a kick between the man's legs. "Is for Peter." He wiped his nose and turned. "I'll let you get back to bringing this scum in. Thanks." He walked away, listening to the man's grunting and the guards snickering, until he reached the bridge. "Where is he?" Were the first words out of his mouth when he saw Fury. "Hello to you too, Tony. Nice to see you again." Nick stood. "Is that so simple?" "I am in no mood for this, Fury. I want my kid, now." The director's eyebrows went skyward. "Your kid? I thought you only had Morgan..." "No. Mood. Where is Peter?" Now Tony was starting to get annoyed, and the other man could sense it. He didn't want to play games right now. "Okay, okay, I get it. Don't poke the bear. He's right here." Fury stepped away from the console to reveal Peter, staring up at Tony with such adoration, it actually hurt to see the kid's face. "Pete." Tony lunged forward and grabbed the tiny teen in one hand, bringing him close, closing his eyes as he felt the slight weight in his hand. Every little heartbeat, every breath, Tony adored. "I thought I lost you, buddy." "I'm so sorry, Mr. Stark....I messed up. I was selfish and wanted to go outside for a bit, and I got Morgan hurt, and I hurt you and Pepper...I'm so sorry.." Every apology Peter made went straight to Tony's heart and tugged. How was this kid selfish? He was actually the most kind person he'd ever known. "No...none of it was your fault. It was nobody's fault." "How is Morgan? Is she alright? I know she probably blames me, and that's okay, because I-" "Peter, breathe. She's not angry. No one is. I'm just relieved to have you back..." He sighed and hugged the boy as close as he dared, bringing his other hand up, cupping the boy against his shirt. Peter breathed in the comforting scent of Tony Stark. Coffee, motor oil and cologne stuck to the man's skin and clothing and Peter thought it was the best smell in the world. He gripped as much of the man's shirt in his hands as he could, pressing his face into the cloth. "I...I thought I was dead," he whispered, not even sure if the man heard him. "I thought I was dead, and I didn't get to say goodbye, and that made me feel so sad." He pulled away and looked up to see Mr. Stark's billboard sized face staring down at  him. "I never want to leave you, Mr. Stark....I know I have aunt May, and it's going to sound selfish...but..you think maybe I can spend the summer's with you and Pepper? Maybe we could go to the beach or something...Dad?" Tony smiled down at the boy, his eyes misting over so much he had to blink back the moisture. "Of course, kid. I wouldn't have it any other way." He looked up at Fury, who was watching the reunion with  a slight smirk. "Thank you," was all he said and turned. "I owe you one." "You owe me more than one!" the man called with a chuckle. Peter didn't pay much attention, because Rhodey came out of the hallway, panting. "This place is huge! I got lost looking for you." "Well, good thing you found us, because we're leaving. There's a few people back at the farm who are waiting to see you." Peter's eyes lit up and he smiled, hugging Mr. Stark's thumb tightly. Suddenly the nanobots started crawling under the boy and he gasped at the feeling of them crawling past his skin, his body trapped in Mr. Stark's fist. "Um..." "Don't worry, kid. Remember that pocket I was making?" Mr. Stark's suit then opened a bit to reveal a space just big enough for Peter. "Finally finished it the other day. Hop in, let's take it for a spin." Peter nodded and slid out of the man's grip and into the chest pocket, the suit closing over him, wrapping him in a cocoon of warmth. It wasn't until a few seconds later he heard Mr. Stark's heartbeat, feeling it against his body and he felt safe. "You okay?" The man's voice rumbled through and around him. "Yes! This is perfect." It wasn't too hot, like the pockets on the man's suits, the metal kept him cool. "Okay. Let's go." Peter felt the suit take off. The rumbling from the thrusters and Mr. Stark's heartbeat soon lulled the boy into a deep sleep, his body craving it after the hectic few days he'd had. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Pepper was pacing after Tony's call, a sleeping Morgan in her arms while they all waited for the three to come back. It was late, but she didn't care. She wanted to see Peter, make sure he was all right, hold him in her hands. May watched her and after a while, the woman knew she needed to be comforted. Though she was a little sore about Peter calling her mom, but she knew Pepper loved Peter just as much as she did. Getting up, she walked up to the woman, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Hey, why don't you put Morgan to bed, and I'll make some tea. Sound good?" The strawberry blonde stared at May for a minute before nodding. "Yeah, yeah, sure." Pepper smiled slightly. "Thank you." May simply nodded and watched the woman walk off before letting out a breath and putting a kettle of water on. "I think what you're doing is very brave." Laura had walked up to her, setting down the phone after calling her kids at their friends houses, letting them spend the night again. "I don't know how I would react if the kids I raised called someone else 'mom'." May frowned and shook her head. "I don't know how I'm supposed to handle this. I've raised Peter since he was six...I don't know if I can handle it." Mrs. Barton smiled and took the kettle from the woman, putting it on the stove. The others were on the couch, all talking among themselves. "It can be hard to let someone else in. But, you're doing a great job with it." May had to laugh at that one. "You should have seen me the other night...I was ready to tear Pepper's head off when Peter called her mom." She took a deep breath and look to where the woman had gone. "But, then I saw the love in her eyes, as well as Peter's....and I knew in order for him to be happy, he needed both Pepper and Tony in his life." That was the moment she knew she had to stop being selfish with hr nephew and let someone else into the little circle she called family. "And that's all I want...is Peter to be happy." Laura smiled. "That's any mother's wish for her children. And though you're not his mother, you've been a great resource for him and you've raised him so well. You should be proud." With that, Mrs. Barton walked to the couch, joining in on the conversation. A noise had May turning to see Pepper coming down the stairs and she looked so weary. The woman walked over to the counter and sat heavily on a stool. "Pepper?" Said woman turned her eyes to May. "You do know everything is going to be all right, right?" May smiled. "I've been around Peter his whole life, and he's always gotten into some kind of trouble, but always he was able to pull himself out. Now, I don't particularly care for the method that he did it, but now, he's got more support than he ever did...and for that, I'm sure he's grateful. I know I am." And she truly was. It suddenly came to her, that as much a family as these people were to Peter, they were to her as well. "Thank you....I just want our boys to come home," Pepper said, her voice betraying how tired she was. "I know you do, too." May nodded. "Isn't that a fact. I just want to hold Peter and never let him go....when he first disappeared, and the police said he was dead, I was beside myself....I almost ended it all. But, there was something telling me that he was alive, and that he was coming home." "Oh May..." Pepper felt so bad for everything that they had done. True that in the beginning they all thought they were doing what was best, even Peter, but now she realized her mistake. "I promise, I won't ever try and take your place in his life. I really can't, because of everything that you've done for him. All that I can ask is to maybe let us be a part of his life? Share some experiences." The brunette nodded, wiping her leaking eyes. "Yeah, I can do that." "Pep, you there?" Tony's voice broke through the moment, making the two women jump. "Tony? Is everything all right?" "Perfectly fine. I'll be coming home with a tiny package in my pocket..who, Friday told me is asleep at the moment. The poor kid was bushed." "I can imagine. Just be careful, okay?" "Yes dear. I can see the farm now. Tell Pym I want to wait until the morning, this way Peter can get a bath before he does anything. The poor kid reeks like fish." Pepper and May laughed at that as they hung up, both women smiling at one another. Their family was coming home. !~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The minute Tony touched down, he was grabbed by his wife in a strong hug. He felt her warmth through the metal as he hugged her back, his eyes closing as his cheek rested against her cheek, his beard tangling with her hair. "Hey Pep." "Hey yourself. Are you okay?" She pulled away to look into his eyes. "Yes, and I know of a little napping teen who wants to say hello." He tapped his reactor, Peter's sleeping form revealed against the man's chest. "I guess he's not up yet." May was there in an instant, her eyes glistening with tears. "Oh, my Peter..." she held her hands out, accepting the boy gratefully. "I'll put him to bed." Tony watched the woman retreat. "Does Pym have everything he needs?" "Yes. He actually finished getting the particles yesterday. Bruce was very interested." "Hm, I bet he was. Come on. I want to check on Morgan. How's her face?" Tony was still pissed at the man now in Fury's care. He was also mad he hadn't found out what happened to Bloom...but, if he was out there, Tony would find him. "She's doing better. Told me 'it looks worse than it feels'. She's so brave." Pepper reached her arm across his back, her hand sliding into his back pocket. "I know she is. Look who had a hand in raising her," he waggled his brows and she laughed as they walked inside. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "You ready?" Hank was standing over Peter on the table, in his hand a needle. He'd unshrunk a lab from his pack for him and Banner to work in, promising Mrs. Barton that everything would be the way it was later that night....maybe. The boy nodded, thought his face was ghost white, staring at the long needle and shaking. "I-I-I'm ready..." Tony stepped forward, giving Pym a harsh glare as he put his thumb over the boy. "Just feel my heartbeat, Pete. Follow it." Morgan peered around her father's arm, giving her 'brother' a smile. "Okay..okay, you can do this....okay, just do it, Mr. Pym!" Peter squeezed his eyes shut and gripped onto Tony's finger with all his strength, making the man wince. Hank nodded and slowly inserted the thin needle into the boy's arm, watching what he was doing in the magnifying machine. Once blood started flowing, the man waited a few seconds before withdrawing and held a piece of a cotton ball to the injection sight. "You did great, Pete." He smiled at the teen and walked to Banner, putting the sample into the computer. "What's that? It have molecular specs?" Stark was peering over Hank's shoulder, watching every move he was making. "Oh, what's this?" He made to touch a scale and Pym slapped his hand. "Do I have to tell you to get out, Stark?" he growled. "Maybe." The man grinned, but backed away with his hands up. "Okay, okay, I break I bought it. I get it." He walked back towards Peter and Pepper, who was scowling at the man playfully. "What a grouch," he stage whispered. Hank simply rolled his eyes, continuing to study Peter's blood. "This could be tricky," he told Banner, who nodded. "I thought the same, even without knowledge of the makeup of Pym Particles. And like I said, Sean buried the makeup so well I couldn't even find out what the particles were made of." Pym studied the blood more and smiled. "Sean, you son of a bitch....you couldn't find the particles because he didn't use my particles....He developed a whole new serum...." He shook his head. Now it would be easy to find out what the late scientist had done. "I just need a molecular view of the boy's DNA." "Oh, I'm already on that," Stark said, phone in hand. "Aaaaannnnddd....I'm in. Friday?" "On it." The AI took the image of the blood sample and magnified it, making it a hologram in order for the whole team to see. "This is why I can't stand your entire family, Stark...you just do what you want. Just like your father." Stark glared and took a step forward. Bruce was in between the men in a second, a hand on each of their chests. "Guys, let's not do this here. Remember Peter here is key priority. You can duke it out after we fix him." Tony nodded. "Yeah, yeah." He backed up, sniffing indignantly. "The kid comes first." He turned and picked up Morgan, hugging her close. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hours passed and the two scientists worked the entire time in silence trying to reverse the work Sean had done. Finally, when they had just about lost hope, Hank clapped his hands. "I figured it out!" He ran to the white board. "Why didn't I think of this before? You remember when the Kosmosians were discovered? And they brought the bridge?" Banner nodded, and suddenly his eyes lit up. "That's it! Hank, you're a genius! All we have to do is inject Peter with a reverse serum, then attach the bridge to him in some way." "And I know the perfect way," Hank said, a glimmer in his eye. "Bill Foster had an adoptive daughter, who was a victim of the first Quantum tunnel explosion. She was affected by the quantum energy and almost died from her phase shifting. He had built her a sort of container...anyway, when we healed her, I opted to hang on to the cabin, just in case we needed it for her. But, the healing particles have been a success. And once we inject those particles into Peter, we can put him in the cabin and attach the brige." "Okay, I get that, but, how does that help Peter? The bridge, I mean." "The Kosmosians have been working on a way to send their realm's energy here to this realm for a project we're working on. And no, you can't know the name of it." "I wasn't gonna ask. But, you're saying, you have a way of transferring energy from realm to realm?" "Well, almost. It's really a finite amount at the moment, but it may just be enough to do what we need it to do." Hank went to his bag and pulled out a small container, placing it in the middle of the lab. "Stand back." He pressed the remote and instantly there was a huge glass-like chamber.   "I'll never get over that," Bruce said with a smile. "Now you sound like Scott," Pym complained and went back into his bag, taking out a tiny pin shaped object. "I need you to attach this to the tube in the cabin. I'll continue working on the serum." Banner nodded and took the little object from Pym, observing it. "And don't drop it." "Hey, I only sound like Scott," Bruce laughed and went to the cabin to begin his job. Bruce checked the bridge was attached inside the tubing leading from the cabin. May was behind him, holding Peter close to her chest watching every move Banner made. "Hey, Pete," the scientist said as he turned, smiling at the tiny teen. "Now, this isn't gonna hurt, okay? Just a little stick and an injection. It's gonna take time for the serum to work, so don't expect any miracles." Peter nodded and gulped, then looked for Dr. Pym. "Mr. Pym?" the boy called and the man walked over. "Is...is there any way for you to fix my DNA too?" Bruce had been waiting for this. He and Pym had talked about it while the team was searching for Peter and they exchanged sorrowful glances. "I'm sorry," Hank told him. "It would be impossible to change your DNA back. It's been too long and the spider venom they injected you with has had too much time to fully form with your genetic code." Peter just nodded, his lower jaw wobbling. "But, I did hear that Tony had asked you to come back to the compound to train, right? I bet that's exciting." The teen nodded, smiling, though his face gave his thoughts away. "Y-yeah...it'll be awesome...I just...I was just hoping to be normal." Hank crouched a bit to look the boy in the eyes, his finger going under the boy's chin. "Now, you listen to me Peter. There is nothing wrong with being different. If all of us were 'normal', we wouldn't have the Avengers, now would we?" Peter shook his head. "No sir...I-I guess you're right. Okay....I'm ready." "Good. Miss? I'll need you to give the boy to Dr. Banner." Hank stepped aside for Bruce to step forward. Since he had known Peter longer, it was obvious he would be more comfortable with the boy. May slid her nephew into the scientists cupped hands, giving him a water smile. "You're so brave," she whispered then covered her mouth. "He'll be okay, May. A couple of hours, possibly a day or two in the chamber, and you'll have your nephew back." He gave the woman a smile and turned towards the empty glass box. "Now, Peter, you have to understand a few points. While your body is absorbing the healing particles from the Quantum realm, there will be a little discomfort, but no full on pain, okay? And, you can not speak. Once we start the process, you can't use your vocal cords at all, do you understand? If you do, your throat will continue to grow, but your vocal chords will cease to grow and eventually be absorbed into your muscles, leaving you mute and do some major damage." The teen grew pale, but he nodded. "I understand. And Dr. Banner?" The man turned his eyes to the teen. "Thank you, for everything." "You're very welcome, Peter." He climbed into the glass chamber and set Peter on the floor, backing out. "All right. Here goes nothing. Dr. Pym?" The white haired man nodded and started the chamber. "I think it would be best for everyone to leave." He nodded to Pepper, who put a hand on May's shoulder. "Come on. You can see him once it's over." She smiled at the woman, who nodded shakily. "I love you Petey-pie," she called before the door closed, leaving the two scientists alone. "Okay. Chamber door, secured." Banner told Pym, who gave him a thumbs up, inputting code into the computer. "All right....Injection ready." The white haired man walked over to the chamber, grabbing a syringe from the table. "Peter, I need you to walk towards the tube to your right." Peter nodded and jogged to the spot, holding his arm out, not making a sound. "You're doing great." He slid the needle into the tube. "Hold still.......and done. Good job." He slid the needle out and closed the latch, securing it. "How's it going on your end, Banner?" "All good here. Ready whenever you are." Hank nodded and rushed to his console, opening the bridge protocol. "Bridge connection in three......two......one.....NOW!" He pushed enter and instantly the chamber was filled with a dull, almost black light with gold specks floating in it. "Wow....that's....it's beautiful." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The air around Peter had grown thick and the boy was finding it harder to breathe, but not by much. But, was it enough to affect his vision, because everything was starting to turn black. He felt his breathing increase as he panicked, looking around. "Peter," came Dr. Banner's voice. "Your breathing is getting a little heavy. Everything you're seeing is normal, and we can see the black smoke, too. We're almost done, bud. Just a little more and you can come out." The teen nodded, even though he was sure the giant adults couldn't see him. Peter took a few steadying breaths, remembering the breathing techniques Mr. Stark taught him. It worked like the other times and Peter's breathing came back to normal. When he opened his eyes, he was suddenly struck with the most beautiful sight. Gold specks seemed to dance in the black around him, almost looking like stars in the universe. He stared up at them, even reaching out to touch a few that danced by him, laughing silently when they broke apart and melted back together around his fingers. This was amazing. He only wished his aunt could see it.   He sat on the floor and crossed his legs and waited, imagining himself normal again, the image making him smile. The lights suddenly stopped and all seemed to congregate around Peter before all shooting towards the teen. He cried out as his body was pummeled from the inside out and finally passed out. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hours passed and May was getting antsy. She checked her watch. Five hours! "How long is he going to be in there and why couldn't I be in there with him? What if he gets scared?" She had always been the one to comfort the boy when he came home, crying from being bullied and having his glasses broken or had gotten a black eye. Especially after Ben had died. Those were the days where they comforted each other. "I'm sure he's fine," Pepper smiled. "If he wasn't, Bruce or Hank would come get you. Have you eaten yet?" The brunette shook her head. "Well, you should. It would help with passing the time." May knew the woman was right as she made her way to the refrigerator, Laura smiling at her as she passed the woman. "I can't wait to see him," Clint wrapped an arm around his wife. "I mean, really see him. So far it's been like trying to read those little dolls...what are they? Polly something. Hate those things. They hurt worse than Lego's if you step on them." His wife elbowed him in the ribs at the face May made at him, her skin white as a sheet. "I promise I would never have stepped on Peter, though! He was pretty much always in one of our hands...except Natasha or Steve. They thought he was a spy for the longest time." Steve actually looked at the ground, his face turning red. "I do apologize about that...Once I met you, Mrs. Parker, I knew he couldn't have been a spy for Hydra." He paused and glanced at the woman. "He's actually a good kid." "Damn right he's a good kid," May retorted adamantly. "I raised him right." She finished making her sandwich and slammed the fridge shut. "I wouldn't doubt that, and the proof is in the boy." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Peter? Are you okay?" A voice screamed, banging against the glass. The air was still dense as Peter slowly opened his eyes. His body hurt like crazy, but it wasn't anything he couldn't handle. He sat up and winced, a hand going to his head as a dizzy spell hit him. "Peter! You have to talk to me!" Dr. Banner was pressed against the glass, but Peter was able to see him. It was almost like a two way mirror. "Yeah," the boy finally answered.  He looked at the walls and noticed they were a lot closer than they had been. "I'm okay...is it smaller in here?" The scientist smiled. "It should be. Pym! Close the bridge!" Peter couldn't see the man, but he guessed this 'bridge' was finally closed as the lights and the black fog went away. Soon, the chamber was empty, leaving Peter alone....and naked inside. "Holy crap!!" the boy shuffled into a corner and curled up, staring at Dr. Banner with scared eyes. "It worked!" "I can see that," Dr. Pym came beside Dr. Banner with a large towel on his arm. "I'm guessing Clint can loan you some of his boy's clothes, if not his own." He opened the door and handed the boy the cover, both men turning away as Peter stood to wrap himself. "Whoa..not used to seeing the ground so far away." The teen raised his hand out and laughed a little, examining his own body like it was some wonder. Well, to him it was. He gingerly stepped out of the chamber, the two man turning to him. "Wow...I can see eye to eye with you." "Welcome back, Peter," Dr. Banner said, clasping his shoulder. "Let's go get you some clothes." The boy nodded and they walked from the lab and to the house. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Peter pushed open the door at Dr. Banner's insistence and stopped when several eyes landed on him. "Hello...everyone." Instantly May threw herself at her nephew, her tears soaking the boy's shoulder. "Oh Peter! My Peter!" She pulled away and grabbed his face, looking at him. "I missed seeing you like this." She pulled him to her again, squeezing him. "Well, kid. Looks like you're still short." Mr. Stark came over. "It's good to see you back to normal though. Just sorry it took so long." "No! Mr. Stark, I am so grateful for everything you've done! Thank you." The minute May let him go to find a tissue, Peter did what he wanted to do from the first week. Beckoning Pepper over with Morgan, he threw his arms around them in a strong hug, not noticing when Mr. Stark winced. "Peter," the man wheezed. "Let go, buddy..." Automatically the kid let them go, his face guilt stricken. "Maybe you shouldn't try hugs until the Capsicle can give you lessons on how to control your strength." "Sorry," Peter said lowly, playing with the hem of the towel. Clint came up behind the boy holding clothes. "Here. These might be a little big, but I'm sure you're used to that." He winked at the boy playfully and handed him the clothes. "Haha, so funny. But, thank you." Peter disappeared from the room to get changed. "Who knew Peter was such a cutie?" Natasha said with a glance at Bruce, who folded his arms in a pout at that. "But, I like green still." She winked at Banner, who smiled. Peter walked back into the room. "Everyone...I want to say thank you so much for everything...." He looked to Morgan, who was smiling, her black eye looking better, but still horrible. "You were all so brave...and I don't know what would have become of me if you hadn't come that day and rescued me. I'd probably be dead...." he wiped his nose. "So, thank you.." Steve walked up to the boy and offered a hand. "No thanks are necessary, Peter. We're just glad you're all right." The boy grinned at the captain and grabbed his hand tight, shaking it. "Now, what do you say about going out to eat? My treat," said Tony, who laughed when everyone agreed. "Moochers." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~                                 ---Three months later--- Peter sat in the back of the car, Happy driving him to the compound. Ever since he'd gotten fixed, Mr. Stark had invited him up for some training to control his new 'abilities'. He was a bit sad that Dr. Pym wasn't able to get rid of them, but they actually helped a lot in the long run. Even though the training hadn't allowed him to go back to his dance or gymnastics, he was learning a lot more, though it still freaked May out whenever he would walk on the ceilings. "You okay, kid?" Happy's voice entered his thoughts and Peter sat up. "Oh, yeah....I'm okay, Happy. Are we almost there?" The driver nodded. "Yep. You should see what Tony did to the compound, though," the man shook his head. "It looks like Christmas exploded all over the walls." Peter laughed. "I can't wait to see it!" He looked to the small pile of gifts on the seat next to him. With Mr. Stark helping May out with the food bills, there was a little extra money in the budget for him to do a little shopping for the holidays. It wasn't much, but he thought extremely hard what to get everyone. "Is dad there now?" "Yeah. He likes to come up every now and then. He asks about your training a lot." Peter blushed, pleased. "I'm doing good. I don't hurt May when I hug her anymore. I still break some things, like I broke a lamp the other day when I picked it up to move it." He chuckled at that. "May was angry...said it was her favorite lamp." The car fell into a comfortable silence until Happy pulled onto the road that lead to the compound. Instantly, Peter saw that the man wasn't kidding. There was still some snow on the ground from a storm that hit a few days ago, and that added to the winter wonderland scene that the compound was sporting. There was a giant inflatable Santa standing in front of the compound, waving in the wind. "Uncle Clint," he laughed and Happy nodded. "How'd you guess?" The man pulled up to the building and Peter jumped out, leaning to gather all the presents, Happy helping to grab some that fell. "Thanks! Two of those are yours, by the way. One from me and one from May." That made the man's face light up and he smiled as they walked. The minute Peter stepped in, he was surrounded by red and green everywhere. "Wow...you weren't kidding," he laughed, looking around. "Told you. If you want, Tony's up in his lab," the man said, handing Peter the presents except two. "Thank you, Happy." Instead of going up to the lab, Peter went to the elevator and went up to the common room to find a big tree sitting in the corner. Quickly, he placed the presents under it, but kept two of them in his hands. He turned and finally went to the lab, finding his kind of adoptive 'parents' standing side by side, the woman laughing at something her husband said. They turned when the door opened. "Hey Pete!" Mr. Stark said, joy in his voice. "Good to see you!" "Yeah, same." Peter hid the boxes behind his back, and leaned up on his toes. "So, how have you been?" "Kid, you act like we don't speak all the time on the phone. Get over here." The man held his arms open and Peter smiled, rushing over to give him a hug. "Hey, you're getting better at control. Hardly felt that one." "Yeah, Mr. Rogers is helping a lot, and so is Dr. Banner. He helped me develop a new webbing solvent that will work with the formula I created. It even fits in the new web shooters I designed. I was thinking of, you know....becoming a crime fighter?" He looked to Mr. Stark and Pepper for approval. "That's great, honey!" Pepper wrapped her arms around him. "I am so proud that you'll be using your abilities to do something good." "Yes, that is a good thing. Or else I would have built this for nothing." Mr. Stark stepped to the side to reveal a suit folded on the table. Peter stared at it for a minute before stepping towards it. He ran his hand over the mask, the web design around the eyes. Putting the boxes he held on the table, he picked it up and had to smile at the blue mixed in with the red. "It's perfect..." he whispered, tears gathering in his eyes. He bunched the material in his hands. "Thank you!" "Oh? What's this?" Mr. Stark had noticed the wrapped boxes and picked them up, shaking them. "For us?" Peter nodded, too emotional to speak. The man smiled and started unwrapping his, Pepper rolling her eyes, but doing the same. The minute Tony saw what was inside the box, he froze. It was an iron man plaque. He stared at the surface of it, reading the words "best dad ever" over and over, feeling his heart melt every time. He glanced at Pepper, who held hers up. It read "I love you Mom". The two put their presents down and went to their 'son'. "We love you, too, kid." Tony said and they enveloped him in a tight hug. This was the best Christmas they'd ever had.

@sparrowrider @midas-or-khaos @letsbeinspiredby @6inchicon @carttorchdeatth @ixlovexirondad

[turnyourankle]

Louis phone has blown up while he was sleeping, and he scrunches his eyes shut before scrolling through his notifications. From the tone of the messages it seems nothing serious was behind people reaching out to him. No, there's plenty of playful emojis and 'hahahah's riddling his notifications. Louis knows what that means.

Just Grimshaw talking smack about him on air again, getting the peanut gallery excited for a possible brawl, the texts and tweets and instagram messages Louis has gotten all egging him on to respond.

Louis grunts and rolls his eyes. It’s not ideal, this bizarre pas-de-deux that he and Nick are doing. To everyone else the two share a mutual distaste for each other, clever hotheads who enjoy the sparring and sharp banter. But Louis knows what Nick is doing. He’s trying to get Louis’ attention.

Yes, that way.

Nick’d told Louis it was exactly what he was doing a few months ago at a Brits after party. “My favourite Doncaster celebrity ambassador,” Nick had said, arm easily circling Louis’ shoulders. He pulled Louis into his chest as if bragging about his height advantage.

Louis hadn’t gotten a chance to respond with his face pressed against Nick’s open shirt. His perfume is strong and woodsy. Cerf Blanc, Louis knows, because Nick has talked about his love for it on his show.

(Yes, so what if Louis listens to him from time to time? It doesn’t mean anything.)

Louis hadn’t thought he’d enjoy the smell so much though, bracing himself against Nick’s chest to push away again. “Still haven’t gotten the key to Oldham?” Louis asked, flicking his fringe out of his eyes.

“I’ve got no use for a key, love, unless it’s to your heart,” Nick said, finger pointed against Louis’ chest. As if commanding Louis’ heart to beat faster.

Louis narrowed his eyes, too used to Nick’s jeers to take him seriously.

“Oh,” Nick’s face fell. He tilted his head up, chest opening as he rolled his shoulders back. “You think I’m having a laugh.”

Louis swept the rest of his beer, eyebrows raised. Nick’s eyes didn’t stray from Louis’ face. He was still unbearable close, his breath sweet from the liquor he’d been drinking. Mouth red, tongue peeking out of his mouth with every word.

“I’m dead serious.” Nick patted Louis’ shoulder, said, “You’ve got my number, Louis.”

Louis hadn’t believed Nick at first. But the way he’d said his name was charged, and Louis recognized the tone every time Nick spoke about him on air.

Inadvertently, Louis was paying attention to Nick more than before, a mawing inside of his chest wanting to hear what Nick had to say next about him.

Once, Nick alerted PETA to Louis’ dislike of avocados, saying they might want to get involved and educated fans that would turn their backs on the vegetable because of him.

Louis could picture Nick’s face as he would say it, the way his mouth would pull to the side just as it’d done when he’d spoken to Louis in person. It was childish, it was immature, it was juvenile but--

But it was working.

Despite the differences between them and Nick’s unfortunate habit of oversharing and poking the bear for controversy’s sake Louis couldn’t forget his tone, his physical presence when he’d made it clear he was actually interested in Louis.

Which leaves Louis eager to hear what Nick has said just now, just hours ago, a tiny flutter of anticipation at Grimshaw thinking about him.

It’s easy enough to find the clip, and Louis listens to it.

“What’s new, Grimmy?” Annie asks, a leading question of Louis’ has ever heard one.

Louis can practically hear the smirk in Nick’s voice as he responds, “I got one of those little news blurbs pushed to me, you know those, yeah? This headline reads, ‘Prince Louis steals show with clapping and waving’ and I’ve got to sit and ask which Louis they’re talking about.”

“The prince, they said so.”

“Right but was this about the actual prince or is this a fan article for friend-of-the-show, Louis Tomlinson?”

“Good question, that. D’you know?”

“No clue yet, maybe some kind listeners can fill me in. We can put up a Twitter poll. Which Louis is most likely to stun the crowd? I think we’d like to know the answer to that,” Nick signs off before the beats of Nicki Minaj’s ‘Anaconda’ filters through the airwaves.

Right.

Louis laughs, stifling the sound into his fist. Nick is absolutely ridiculous, but two can play. He quickly composes a tweet and fires it off.

It’s the first time Louis wades into the banter with Nick publicly, and he’s somewhat eager to see what will come of it. A date, perhaps? He bit his lip at the thought.

Louis refreshes his feed, replies filled with question marks pouring in.

Except from Nick who instead just tweeted,

Louis favourites the tweet and sends Nick a message, tongue pressed against the back of his teeth. surprised you knew what that word meant, perhaps we do share some common ground after all?

Louis tries to picture the smirk on Nick’s face when hearing from Louis. Louis hebites his lip, clasping his phone tightly as he prepares himself to hear from Nick, ready to verbally spar for a bit.

He expects to hear from Nick quickly; he’s never had an issue thinking on his feet when it comes to teasing Louis, but nothing comes. Not even after Louis’ message has been marked as sent.

It’s frustrating to say the least, and Louis is starting to wonder whether he’s been played for a fool. Perhaps Nick was winding him up all along, waiting for Louis to slip up and give Nick leverage…

Louis just can’t think of why he hasn’t heard from Nick yet.

-

The next morning there is a text waiting from Nick, one that leaves Louis blinking at his phone, wondering if he’s still asleep, or hallucinating or has developed an acute case of dyslexia because Nick’s message doesn’t make any sense.

Was Nick pretending like Louis had sent him to the clinker because of Nick’s tasteless royalty joke? Because it wasn’t funny, and it felt like he was making Louis the butt of the joke for finally engaging publicly.

Louis doesn’t think before responding, I know it’s not a crime to mock royalty, dickhead

He pockets his phone, not wanting to see any excuses Nick comes up with. He can deal, and does enjoy a good banter session but he won’t be ridiculed.

Oli is already in the kitchen, eating Louis out of house and home with three boxes of cereal in front of him. At least there’s a fresh pot of coffee waiting for him.

“Harry’s in the news again,” Oli said, mouth still full. Louis shrugged. After Nick’s shitty excuse he wasn’t in the mood for Oli insisted, “This is a good one, trust me.”

“Headline?” Louis prompted in a deadpan. The coffee is perfect and he closes his eyes, trying to ground himself.

“‘Styles’ Spider Saga: Where Do Lost Spiders Go?’”

That isn’t what Louis was expecting.

“Gimme that,” Louis says, gesturing to Oli’s phone. He hands it over and Louis quickly scrolls to the meat of the text.

Harry Styles and Nicholas Grimshaw may have a lot of ‘History’ but that all flew out the window last night when Grimshaw, 34, was apprehended on suspicion of kidnapping Styles’ pet arachnid, Bukowski.

“What the fuck,” Louis muttered to himself, grimacing at the insert close up of the spider. Was that really necessary? He scanned the rest of the article, which read more like a puff piece for Harry than anything else. Something about how a new employee of his didn’t realize Nick was supposed to watch the spider and had reported him to the police after he’d tweeted about being in trouble.

Which, he’d only done because Louis had poked fun at him, really. Louis bites back a smile, shaking his head. Perhaps he owes Nick an apology beer after all.

[simplyadorkable-blog1]

Season 6, Episode 17 - “Rumspringa”

Jess is nervous about starting her new role as principal, so Nick and Schmidt take her on a relaxing day trip to Solvang; Cece helps Winston try to finalize his divorce from Rhonda.

“Welcome to Big Dinner, where the news is big and the dinner is regular sized. Not be confused with Big Supper, where we eat dinner and we watch the movie Big.” Jess welcomes us to the episode and I welcome you to this breakdown. Let’s just ignore that they watch Big often enough that they have a name for when they do so. Anyways, Jess and Schmidt have gathered the remaining roomfriends to announce their new promotions and as Schmidt puts it, “celebrate [their] final weekend inside the chrysalis of professional mediocrity before Monday, when [they] burst forth in fully pupated positions.” Let’s all give Jess and Schmidt a round of applause for their new positions as Principal Day and the Director of Non-Television, Non-Radio West Coast Marketing, respectively. Congratulations!

Winston interrupts their proud announcement with an announcement of his own: he has to divorce his wife, Rhonda. To be honest, I totally forgot about her. But Cece clearly has not because she tells Winston that she hates her. “Hey, that’s my wife!” Winston growls back, catching me entirely off guard and sending me into a fit of laughter. Nick comments that it was, “Such a good Harrison Ford.” Great point. Nick then interrupts the celebration to complain that Raisin said his room is stupid. Schmidt is livid that everyone keeps interrupting with all of their common topics. This is why he proposed Common Lunch! Too bad nobody showed up.

Jess tries to put the conversation back on the rails. She points out that she’s so happy and has been preparing for this job ever since she was young enough to believe leprechauns were real. Nick interrupts again to argue that they are real, Winston caught one. Before they can get into the leprechaun debate, Schmidt declares that it’s time for the rites of passage. To the tune of Pomp and Circumstance, Jess presents Schmidt with a new set of business cards and Schmidt presents her with her principal’s blazer. The thought that these two had this entire performance planned out might be funnier than the actual act. It’s quickly made clear that her blazer doesn’t fit and we skip to the middle of the night when Nick finds a frazzled Jess crazily adjusting it.

The next day, Nick approaches Schmidt to get a second opinion on his bedroom. Schmidt agrees with Raisin that it looks like he lives in an abandoned daycare. Nick disagrees because he knows exactly what that looks like. Queue flashback of little Nicky left in an abandoned daycare which is totally plausible considering his dad. “Okay, we need to talk about that a lot more later,” Schmidt is alarmed, as if he was also transported into the flashback. Nick changes the subject to Jess and how she is freaking out about work because he’s still the sweet, attentive guy we know and love.

The pair check on Jess in the kitchen, where she’s still crazily working on her blazer. She unconvincingly tells them that’s she’s “gawd.” Concerned, Nick and Schmidt retreat to his room to figure out how they are going to help. Nick reminds Schmidt of when he helped Schmidt in college by taking him on boy rides Rumspringa. We’re also informed that Schmidt took an Intro. to Environmental Feminism class—what even? Anyways, the decide to take Jess on a little Rumspringa of their own.

Meanwhile Cece is at the bar with Winston and Aly as they wait for Rhonda. Aly cutely coos over her ring and Winston grosses us out by saying, “I love that ring on your finger. I want to bite it off, and swallow it, and then digest it properly. And give it back to you in a day and a half.” This moment is interrupted by Rhonda’s sudden entrance. She’s holding a baby. Hopefully everyone caught onto her prank immediately because if not, Winston’s, “Now you listen to me, baby. My father walked out on me, and I swear I will never do that to you,” line will break your heart. Hell, I even knew it was a prank right away and I was still in awe over Winston’s sweetness. Thankfully Rhonda doesn’t string Winston along and reveals her prank. As we know, Winston’s taste in pranks is terrible so he is the only one to laugh along with Rhonda. Rhonda explains that she borrowed the baby from her obstetrician cousin, Dave, who is also in the bar. Cece points out that that’s a felony, not the two police officers in the room. Aly tries to play nice and introduces herself to Rhonda. She congratulates the engaged couple, signs the divorce papers, and leaves. Can we all agree that despite how annoying her pranks are, her enthusiastic tone is hilariously perfect? Unfortunately, Winston opens to the folder to see that she used disappearing ink and effectively pranked them.

Back at the loft, Nick and Schmidt barge into Jess’ room where she has unknowingly added two additional sleeves to her blazer. How did that happen? Wasn’t she just letting it out? Anyways, the guys suggest a boy ride/Rumspringa to take her mind off of her first day jitters. Jess adamantly refuses, citing, “Rumspringa is a hallowed Amish tradition, not a one-day buddy comedy. Second of all, I don’t want to go to a casino or a sexual petting zoo.” Schmidt explains that’s why they’re going to an old-timey Danish town oddly located in California wine country called Solvang.

At the craft fair in Solvang, Jess continues to pout and tries to leave. Schmidt tells her he paid for all-day parking so she’s out of her mind if she thinks they’re going to leave. That statement is vaguely paternal so we better get a Schmece baby in season 7 (#reNewGirl). Nick encourages Jess to have fun and picks up a sign from a nearby vendor. “Look at this sign: “When has it become a crime to rhyme all the time?” So true! And it’s really funny.” “Somebody just thought of that,” Schmidt chimes in. Nick’s truly grasping at straws, but it’s so endearing, I wish Jess would open her unusually large eyes! Instead, she wants to go home and practice her morning announcement voice. Schmidt thinks she’s overthinking this and tells her to exude confidence all the time like him. Jess tells him he can’t skate by on confidence alone since he’s the boss now. This scares Schmidt so they’re both freaking out when Nick reappears with a folksy, old-timey reenactment guy. This somehow convinces Jess to stay—Nick knows her so well—and she springs into Leslie Knope mode and starts firing off questions. But if you ask me, I’m 99.9% that’s not the real Ben Franklin. Wait, what? Before she can get through all 87 of her questions, he offers them Aquavit, which is a flavored spirit from Scandinavia, according to a quick Google search.

I guess Rhonda is still close to the bar because she’s already back and laughing at Winston for falling for her disappearing ink trick. Aly is justifiably furious and demands that Rhonda grow up and stop acting like Dennis the freaking Menace. Rhonda thinks Aly’s dislike of pranks is basic and is worried about Winston marrying her. She goes on say she’s never going to give Winston a divorce and she’ll prank him for life. Winston tries to reassure Aly and they’ll figure something out. It turns out that that something is agreeing to help pull a group Rhonda so she’ll sign the papers with permanent ink.

At Solvang, Jess gets hammered on Aquavit and Nick buys a quilted jacket that he wants to make into a throw pillow. Nick is going full country-living. When Jess tries to buy more Aquavit, the vendor informs her that it’s 4:30 pm and they close early on Sunday. Nick tries to keep the party going by taking them to the Aquavit cellar and inadvertently locks them in. To be fair, he really does keep the party going. Jess immediately starts shouting out the tiny window in the door that they need to pupate. “They don’t know what that means. Say something more accessible. Help!” Yes, much better, Schmidt.

After over an hour of being trapped, Nick is still trying to distract Jess like the perfect boyfriend we all wish he currently was. “Our bodies are trapped in this cellar, but our minds can go anywhere.” He switches his attention to Schmidt, who’s shouting that he’s the Director of Marketing for Associated Strategies out the tiny window, and asks him to pick a number. Schmidt picks 23, which is wrong. Jess picks 19, which is right. Same wavelength, those two. Nick tries to entertain them by saying a bird is going to pop out from the cuckoo clock that is for some reason in the cellar. Jess rips out the bird in anger and yells at Nick that they’re adults and can’t handle their problems by forgetting about them. Nick finally cracks, saying, “You’re right. Maybe I handle my problems like a child. Maybe I decorate my room like a child. I mean, I even undress like a child.” His flashback of trying to kick off his pants has me in stitches. Does he do that every time? “I’m usually the rock of this group. Once you lose old Nicky Miller, the whole thing falls apart,” He continues and starts to drink a bottle of Aquavit.

We return to Rhonda’s prank where Cece and Winston, dressed as nurses, rush into a delivery room with Rhonda covering her face on the bed. Dave, our second favorite New Girl female health practitioner, is in the room and lifts up the sheet to take a look. Aly’s jelly-covered head is poking up through a hole in the cart and scares Dave. She deadpans, “Wah. I’m a baby. I’m coming out.” Rhonda then reveals herself and “Rhonda’s” Dave. Aly crawls out from under the cart and starts to freak out that her skin in burning. Winston rushes to Aly’s side, worried. Rhonda apologizes to Aly. Rightfully so, because she just got Aly’d. Rhonda is impressed with her prank game and agrees to sign the papers and gives the couple her blessing.

Back in the cellar, it’s now 4:00 am. The guys have been peeing in bottles for hours and Jess is sad that she’s missing her first day. Nick promises that once they get out, he’s going to start growing up. He says there’s so much he wants to do like try cilantro, figure out what NASDAQ means, and not shimmy out of his pants. He also apologizes to Jess for kidnapping her, he just hated to see her with first-day jitters. Can they just start dating already? Jess realizes she’s being silly, she’s been preparing for this job her entire life. Nick suggests they toast with a bottle of champagne, which Schmidt points out has a wire around the cork. He channels his inner Nancy Drew and picks the lock, allowing them to rush out. Upon arriving at their car, they realize that they’re all too drunk to drive. Thankfully, Schmidt exchanged numbers with the reenactment guy and he comes to the rescue with the promise of getting on The Price Is Right.

Cece, Winston, and Aly’s storyline wraps up back at the the loft. The divorce papers are finally finalized. Winston assures the ladies that they’re good since the longest disappearing ink on record is only 42 minutes. Shouts to the blog I follow who pointed out that Winston has that memorized. Aly admits that she actually had a good time pranking Rhonda and that they could get into it as a couple. They can prank, have sex, and pet the cat. #RelationshipGoals. Remember when Winston’s proposal included his complicated relationship with God? Well it’s true, because he goes off on a tangent about how we are pranks because God pranked the animals with us. Aly finds this endearing and they kiss. Meanwhile Cece notices that there are adoption papers among the divorce papers and that Rhonda adopted Aly in Liberia. I guess she got the last laugh…? I hope that’s just a throw away line because I’ve had enough incestual relationships this season.

Jess makes it to her school just in time for morning announcements, but when Nick encourages her to get out of the car and be principal, she suddenly gets nervous again. Nick, like the sweetheart he is, asks Schmidt for a minute alone with Jess. Schmidt exits, saying, “Sure. A grown man standing around a bunch of ten-year-olds, holding bottles of his own urine. What could go wrong?” Now alone, Nick tells Jess he knows what’s wrong with her. She’s scared that she’s reached her goal. Jess admits it’s stupid, but Nick disagrees. “And as a guy who has never had a path like that, I’m personally really excited to see what happens next.” Then they stare into each other’s eyes. Jess, freshly emboldened, gets out of the car. She takes a few steps before realizing she forgot her blazer. When she turns back to the car, Nick gives her his new, quilted jacket. “But I thought you were going to make a pillow out of that,” Jess tries to give it back. “Ah, it won’t fit in my room. It’s not a good style for me. It looks great on you.” Jess thanks him and says, “And, Nick, I… I like your room the way it is. It already has a style. It’s… it’s you.” They smile at each other again and my heart breaks that they’re not together yet.

Originally Aired 2/21/2017

[moviegeekandproud-blog]

In the same vein as Diary of a Wimpy Kid, another childhood favorite book series has been adapted for our viewing pleasure for the big screen. Captain Underpants come from the mind and illustrative skills of Dav Pilkey. It is about two fourth graders George and Harold, who have the best friendship anyone young or old would want and they both have a wild imagination that they channel to make comic strips. One of their biggest creations is Captain Underpants.

At school they have a love/hate relationship with their principal Mr. Krupp, a grumpy man who hates fun, happiness, and kids. Since George and Harold are known as the class clowns and for pulling pranks, Principal Krupp has reached the final straw and has made the decision to separate them and put them in separate classes. Which to a kid in elementary school that is the end of the world. In a way to fix this issue, they hypnotize the Principal that he is no longer a Principal and that he is actually the amazing Captain Underpants and fights crime with his superpowers. What they don’t know is that it actually worked and now they have a grown man running around in his underwear causing havoc Inspector Gadget style and the boys use this to their advantage. 

  There are some good qualities that I think makes this an effective children’s movie but for adults and parents, you are in for a possible disappointing ride depending on your sense of humor. Let me explain….

This story and two lead characters George (Kevin Hart) and Harold (Thomas Middleditch) break the fourth wall and address the audience a lot in narrating this tale. Again, with big imaginations like theirs, it’s no wonder they are speaking to the audience who are not apart of the story. With that being said, their way of telling the story is fit perfectly for a kid but can be very annoying for the adults who are watching. Not that its pointless or boring. Just that the movie, kind of goes at 100 miles an hour with its visuals and toilet humor. I mean what do you really expect with the comic relief being used in a movie with the title Captain Underpants. There are a lot of fart jokes, toilet humor, and childlike humor that appeals more to kids than adults. From the start this humor goes full force in your face and really doesn’t change its tone. There is a lot of self-aware going on and I believe this movie has that advantage going for them. 

This film is an A.D.D Eleganza Extravaganza

I found the voice cast in addition to Hart and Middleditch to be pretty good. Ed Helms is the one playing Principal Krupp/Captain Underpants and he does a great job of switching back and forth between an angry grump to a lovable childlike character with a great singing voice. Nick Kroll provides the voice of our villain that came out of no where. I would say he provides the most adult humor in the movie, his dialogue and train of thought speaks to the adult in the room that may find his obvious observation to be laughable. His introduction into the movie is a little out of left field but his mission and purpose in the film is sort of metaphor for bullying and also growing out of that child like manner that you lose when you reach a certain age. 

The animation is pretty good and it provides a lot of physical comedy. The movie wasn’t as funny as I thought it was going to be and with such a cult following to the book I did have the expectation of something better than what I saw. As an adult who does like watching cartoons, I have seen better features than this one. Story wise I did enjoy this plot better than the latest animated movie I watched, Boss Baby, also from DreamWorks Animation. The jokes and comedy I think was a little disappointing. I did laugh out loud more than once but overall the movie was a little stale for my taste. 

Here is what I’ll say to the target audience, this movie is definitely for kids. Adults may enjoy how much fun their children are having but if you don’t like the humor that is being displayed right from the beginning, you may be put off a little bit throughout the film as the humor doesn’t change. I love the friendship between Harold and George a lot. Those two are #friendshipgoals that I think anyone would want to have. Of course any type of relationship between two different ethnicities I fully support. These guys would do anything for each other and hopefully that messages speaks louder than playing pranks at school, bullying or making fun of the kid who “doesn’t get it”. I see this movie turning into a Netflix series because this type of story has so many options they can run with. I also would have loved to have seen this be done as a live action movie. Even with the cartoon like violence and humor I think can be accomplished. Look at the movie Shorts or Spy Kids by Robert Rodriguez. This would be a perfect project for him based on his resume. 

3 out of 5

P.S. you will notice a kid named Melvin throughout the film. You may be able to recognize the voice talent of the other characters but Melvin was a complete mystery to me. Turns out the teacher’s pet, tattletale, know-it-all is none other than Jordan Peele.

I know right. Couldn’t tell at all it was him.  

  Review: Captain Underpants Provides The Fun and Joy Of Being A Kid. In the same vein as Diary of a Wimpy Kid, another childhood favorite book series has been adapted for our viewing pleasure for the big screen.