#personally though i think that benrey is the one to be held in arms like a pathetic wet kitten

[chalc0]

NAILS & BALLS

[waitineedaname]

Benrey knew about bouquets theoretically.

They were what the winners got in some sports games, and they were bought by sitcom boyfriends when they’d fucked up with their girlfriends. They were bundles of flowers that held some kind of meaning that was really beyond Benrey.

The thing was, he never saw one in person until months after they’d all made it out of Black Mesa. They were all at the Boomer household, throwing them an anniversary party. No one was quite sure if it was their one year anniversary or fiftieth anniversary -- neither of them would give anyone a clear answer -- but Bubby had presented his husband with an enormous bouquet of flowers, trying and failing to appear like anything but a sappy fool. 

Benrey was fascinated by it.

Xen didn’t have flowers. There were plant-adjacent things, sure, but most of them tried to stab passersby or emitted poisonous gasses. Benrey was sitting on a barstool next to the bouquet in its vase on the countertop, and he had yet to be stabbed by the dethorned roses, and the sprigs of lavender didn’t emit anything except a soothing scent that reminded him of the hand lotion Gordon wouldn’t let him eat. He gently ran his fingers over the layers of carnation petals while Coomer spoke beside him.

“-language of flowers was introduced to England in the early 18th century by Mary Wortley, Lady Montague, whose husband was Ambassador to Turkey. By the Victorian era, almost every-”

“Flowers have a language?” Benrey said, looking up and zoning back into the Wikipedia infodump. 

“Yes!” Dr. Coomer informed him brightly. “Floriography (language of flowers) is a means of cryptological communication through the use or arrangement of flowers. Meaning has been attributed to flowers for thousands of years, and some form of floriography has been practiced in traditional cultures throughout Europe, Asia, and Africa. In Western culture, William Shakespeare ascribed emblematic meanings to flowers, especially in Hamlet, Prince of Denmark. Similarly, in a scene in his Henry VI, Part 1, English noblemen pick either red or white roses to symbolize their allegiance to the Houses-” 

“So different colors have different meanings? Like, uh. Like Sweet Voice?”

“Yeah!” Tommy answered him this time, Dr. Coomer too busy telling the rest of them about Victorian flower meanings. “And- And each kind of flower has a different meaning too. It’s like a whole language!”

Benrey stared at the bundle of flowers in front of him. He sang out a Sweet Voice note the exact shade of one of the scabiosas and smiled.

He didn’t tell anyone his plan when he started. Something told him that would ruin it somehow. It felt more meaningful to have it be a surprise. He did his research in private. Wikipedia may be gone, but there were still plenty of websites eager to inform him of all the strange meanings Victorians applied to flowers. (What the hell was “assiduous to please” supposed to mean?) He stayed up after Tommy and Gordon had gone to bed, and sang notes of Sweet Voice as softly as he could, searching for the right correlations between flowers and Sweet Voice colors.

A bouquet arrived on Bubby and Coomer’s doorstep first. Cheerful American starworts and chrysanthemums wrapped in convolvulus, accompanied by sprigs of larch and black poplar. (White like sagebud to misty golden, you’re a bold one. Morning glory, I’m glad you got through this story. Black poplar to yellow larch, I’ll follow where you charge.) Bubby was wildly confused by its appearance, but the next time he saw them, Coomer took Benrey under his arm and gave him a noogie that would’ve drilled a hole into anyone else’s skull.

Gordon and Tommy’s came next, and Benrey made sure they arrived at the same time. Gordon was the one to find them, having opened the door to two bouquets addressed to the two of them. “Uh, Tommy?” He called out over his shoulder, picking up his bouquet and examining it. Bright Peruvian heliotropes peered out from between hundred-leaved roses and pencil-leaved geraniums, all surrounded by southernwood and Irish ivy. (Purple as heliotrope, you give me hope. Geranium to rosy pink, I’ll love you forever, I think. Green as ivy and southernwood, for you, I’ll be good.) “Do you know anything about this?”

“No,” Tommy said, walking up behind him and peering over his shoulder. When Gordon stepped aside for him, he scooped up his bouquet too. His was entirely made of flowers, a bright splash of color: the warm colors of the red periwinkles and scarlet lychnis offset by the American cowslips and traveller’s joys. (Scarlet, with you, my worries I forget. Purple like cowslip, I think you’re smart as a whip. White, you make my life bright.) “Benrey, do you- did you do this?” 

“Nah, man.” Benrey shrugged, hands in his pockets. “Y’all must have, uh. Some kinda secret admirer, or something.”

Tommy stared at him for a long moment, and Benrey could swear he saw the wheels turning in Tommy’s head, but if he was going to say anything, he was distracted by Gordon ushering them into the kitchen to find vases.

He was hunched over his laptop that night again, trying to figure out if he could feasibly make a tiny arrangement of sorrel, bearded crepis, and juniper to put on Joshua’s bedside table (Green to juniper blue, I’ll protect you. Yellow, I’m proud of this tiny fellow) without Gordon accusing him for bringing weeds in the house, when a voice broke the relative silence of the living room. 

“Ben?” Gordon said groggily. Benrey jumped in his seat and sang out a string of surprised teal. “You’ve been coming to bed late like every night this week, what’s up.”

“Uh, nothing. Just… browsing. Making deals on… eBay.” Benrey bluffed. Gordon squinted at him, clearly not believing the lie, then glanced at the laptop screen.

“Are those flowers?”

“...What are flowers.”

Gordon snorted and draped himself over the back of the couch. “I fucking knew it. You’re not sneaky, dude.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. What are flowers.”

Gordon flicked the side of his head. “Why were you keeping the bouquet thing a secret?”

“I dunno.” Benrey looked away, embarrassed. “Thought it’d be a fun surprise.”

Gordon chuckled and leaned in to kiss his cheek. “I never expected you to be the sentimental type.”

“Didja like them, though?” Benrey looked up, hopeful.

“Obviously. I put them on the kitchen table, they’re beautiful.” Gordon straightened up and reached for Benrey’s hands. “Now c’mon, Gordon want cuddles.”

“Gordon want cuddles? Cuddles from Benrey?” Benrey teased, taking Gordon’s hands and standing. “What about Tommy?”

“Tommy also want cuddles. He’s the one who told me to go get you.” Gordon said, pulling him up the stairs to their room. “Also, he figured out the flower meanings. Why the hell is there a plant for bantering?”

“The Victorias knew banter is important to any relationship, man. It’s like you don’t even understand enemies-to-lovers, smh.”

“Stop saying abbreviations out loud.” Gordon laughed, shoving him into bed, where Tommy sleepily grabbed him.

The following afternoon, Benrey found a vase of roses addressed to him, alongside several seed packets.

[year2000electronics]

PIXELS: Earth but the Video Game Aliens are Self-Aware

In the year 1982, a video game tournament is held. The reason? The victors will have their footage included in a series of tapes being sent to space. The winners and losers of this tournament is where our story begins!

Gordon Freeman, who came second place in his final match (Donkey Kong), is now your average run-of-the-mill geek squad guy. He works to provide for his son, Joshua, who’s a fan of modern video games (”you pretend you’re the guy and you don’t wanna die!”) 

Gordon goes to Dr. Darnold Pepper’s house to install a new TV. The two of them hit it off (they do because the original movie hates women and I do not.), but Darnold thinks Gordon’s following him when they both head to the White House.

He’s still friends with his childhood best friend, Tommy Coolatta, who’s now the President. (Bear with me here.) Tommy calls Gordon to the White House because their base in Guam was attacked last night, with alien formations that look remarkably similar to Galaga! 

Gordon gets excused from the meeting about Guam thanks to general tomfoolery. As he’s heading home, he realizes there’s a new guest in his van.

Forzen, nicknamed “The Wonder Kid” when arcade gaming was in its prime, was a boy genius whose skills rivalled Gordon’s. Unfortunately, he’s an even bigger loser nerd than Gordon and enjoys taping Baywatch reruns and Irate Gamer videos. Also, he hid in Gordon’s van because he’s quirky like that.

He shows Gordon a prerecorded video that interrupted his channel surfing.

Apparently, a race of aliens have received the tapes, and they wrongly believe that the footage of video games are footage of real warriors, and therefore a declaration of war. They communicate exclusively using old 80s VHS tapes, the only unifying element between them being a threat of war and a few cameos with a strange-looking man in them.

With another attack being launched on the Taj Mahal, Gordon and Forzen realize what’s going on. The aliens have given them 3 ‘lives’- and they’ve already wasted two. 

Since the games are the specific 1982 versions, Gordon and Forzen are the only ones who know the patterns well enough to teach the Navy. (..Ignoring the obvious power fantasy here).

Darnold shows off to Tommy, Gordon and Forzen the new light cannons he invented, which can dissolve the light cubes the game warriors are made of. 

The fight is taken to Hyde Park, where the Navy tries and fails to fight Centipede. Gordon and Forzen take the front lines, successfully winning and getting the humans a trophy of their victory. (...It’s Duck Hunt, and some random old man gets it.)

Now that Tommy’s realized the loser nerd gamers are the only ones who can possibly stand against this alien menace, they give them cool jumpsuits and call them Arcaders. Also, they need to talk to the man who beat Gordon at Donkey Kong all those years ago.

Bubby is an old man. Gordon is a normal man. An adult bragged about beating a teen in video games.

This says a lot about the type of person Bubby is.

He calls himself “the Fireblaster”, and says he’s still the best, calling Gordon “second place” all the time.

The three of them (along with Darnold because the original setup was the creator of Pac-Man was there too but I think Darnold should have fun.) head to New York City, where a giant Pac-Man is destroying the city. To defeat Pac-Man, you need ghosts, so the four of them used modified Mini Coopers.

Gordon gets his arm bitten off by Pac-Man because he tried to reason with it like an idiot, which leaves him hiding in an alley for most of the chase. Forzen gets taken out when they realize Pac-Man has access to power pellets, as does Darnold, but with Bubby’s lightning-fast driving skills, he manages to beat Pac-Man. Unfortunately, he drives into the river, leaving only Gordon. Gordon fakes Pac-Man out by driving up a parking garage and waiting for Pac-Man’s 10-second power pellet to run out.

They won! As a gift, the aliens bestow a fighter from Punch-Out!! (Dr. Coomer. He’s not really in punch out but work with me here) upon them as their second trophy. 

The president throws a celebratory gala! Forzen gets to sing his heart out, Gordon and Darnold hang out, Tommy decides Coomer is the most powerful old man...

But then the aliens come on screen, enraged. Apparently, they ‘broke the rules of warfare’, therefore forfeiting, and they say they’ll come to destroy Earth.

Everyone is confused, and we learn thanks to Joshua, Bubby wrote cheat codes on his sunglasses and he’s a big fat cheater.

...Unfortunately the aliens also take Joshua as a Trophy.

Bubby skips town, and the world has gone to shit. 

Everything looks shitty, until Tommy saves Gordon from a Creature with his crane game skills of old. He’s suited up to become an Arcader himself!

Forzen volunteers to fight the aliens on the ground, as does Bubby, when he comes back, but Darnold, Tommy, Gordon and Coomer go to face the mothership. In there, they learn that the aliens have a boss who’s taken a human form and calls himself Benrey (he mostly takes the form to mock the humans, though, also he’s been appearing in the little 80′s clip shows the aliens use to communicate). He challenges Gordon to a final match- Donkey Kong. The irony.

Gordon manages to beat Donkey Kong, saving the world and also getting his son back! Cool. 

Tommy makes a peace treaty with the aliens, who agree to leave, but Benrey and Coomer decide to stay on Earth, because it’s cool and funny. 

Cue 80s ending track.

[purplecatghostposts]

Omg PLEASE write a part 2 for the Pining Gordon snippet you did, if you want! It was sooo cute and so fun to read them banter!!

Hell yes.

Continuation of This

There’s two requests for a part 2 so this is Part Two and THEN there’s gonna be a part thREE.

Unlike most of my shorts/drabbles, I actually came up with a title for this one. It’s called ‘Lights Out’

Edit: Adding a lil ‘Keep Reading’ thing since this got kinda long

——

Gordon’s first mission of ‘Don’t fall in love with the security guard’ failed. Now, his second mission of ‘Don’t flirt with the security guard’ is on the same downhill path.

In Gordon’s defense, it’s been a while, okay?

Before the Resonance Cascade, Gordon’s life was pretty cut and dry. Wake up, take Joshua to kindergarten, double and triple check that his babysitter would pick him up afterwards and if they couldn’t, contact the backup babysitter, and worst comes to worst, contact his ex.

Once he knows Joshua is in good hands, Gordon goes to work, spends most of his day there with the occasional bathroom and lunch break, might catch up with a few coworkers and have to turn down any offers to go out, then head straight home, cook dinner, ask Joshua how his day was, probably draw or watch TV with Joshua, put him to bed, go to sleep, and it starts up all over again.

Rinse and repeat. Being a single dad takes up most of his time, he hasn’t gone on an actual date since Joshua was born and Gordon and his partner decided to split, much less flirted with anyone. Not to mention, nobody’s flirted with him much either.

This isn’t new or unfamiliar territory but... Gordon kinda forgot what it was like to have this feeling in his chest.

Benrey yanks him out of the sight of a turret and when Gordon nearly falls, Benrey catches him just before you hit the ground. Gordon must look as bewildered and flustered as he feels because Benrey can’t hold back a snicker. “What, got two left feet or none at all, Gordon?”

“I’m gay- GREAT, I said I’m great.” Gordon sputtered, quickly standing up straight. Benrey must’ve not heard him because he looks more confused than smug, and Gordon knows he would’ve looked smug if he heard him.

“Whatever you say.” Benrey shrugs, letting it go.

Gordon got off the hook this time but he’s losing it. The latch on Benrey’s helmet broke so Benrey has been wearing his helmet less and less as of late and all Gordon can think of is the fact that he so badly wants to touch his hair.

The idea of asking embarrasses him. How is he supposed to defend himself? Or worse, Benrey is chill enough to where he’d let him. What is Gordon even supposed to do if he says yes? He hasn’t even got that far, every time his mind tries to imagine it, Gordon’s heart palpitates and he has to chill out before Benrey notices.

Assuming he hasn’t already. Benrey’s not an idiot and Gordon’s not a great actor. The inevitability of him putting two and two together is there and it looms over him.

The longer they spend time alone, the longer Gordon can feel himself becoming more and more comfortable with him.

They settle down in a quiet corner of Black Mesa, an office that’s a little worse for wear but it has a door meaning they’ll hear if anyone comes in. The heat must be broken around these parts because Gordon finds himself shivering for once.

A hand reaches over and flicks his nose, because Benrey can never get his attention the normal way, can he? “How are you cold? This... ‘S nothing. How have you even survived this far if this makes you shiver?”

“We’re in New Mexico, Benrey. I’m used to it being hotter.” Gordon shoots back. There’s no bite in their words anymore. With the rest of the Science Team still missing, they’ve fallen into a rhythm. The teasing is still there but... Well, it’s just between friends now.

“You haven’t seen real heat until it’s 170 degrees outside.” Benrey releases a short cackle. Gordon rolls his eyes but the ghost of a smirk betrays him.

“Stop trying to one up me in every conversation with stories about your planet. I get it, shits intense there and you’re like a... Alien god or whatever.”

“And don’t you forget it.” Benrey grins. It falters for a split second when Gordon’s shivering gets a little worse. “Hey uh... Since you’re a loser who can’t control your body temp at will, c’mere. Would be... Would be pretty lame if I just let you die.”

Gordon feels his heart stop, but by some miracle, he inches closer and leans against Benrey. He’s cold, but only for a second. Then he suddenly feels like a heated blanket and Gordon stops thinking. He lets out a breath of relief and without meaning to, drops his entire body weight on Benrey.

Benrey luckily doesn’t budge, nor make much of a fuss. Gordon buries his face into his shoulder. “How..?”

“Huh?”

“You can just... Heat up like that... How are you so lucky? Not fair.” Gordon tells him in a muffled voice. Benrey stifles a laugh.

“I wouldn’t call myself lucky but-” Benrey’s abruptly cut off as his voice turns into a pleasant song. Gordon turns his head and gets a look at pink and golden balls floating in the air. He sits up, staring at them curiously.

When he looks at Benrey again, his face is a deep red. “...As- as I was uh, saying before I was rudely interrupted-”

“What’s gold to pink mean?”

“It’s pink to gold- fuck.” Benrey quickly shut his mouth. It did nothing to sway Gordon’s interest.

“What’s pink to gold mean, Benrey?”

“Look... Do you want the translation or the heat because you’re not gettin’ both. ‘S not fair.”

Gordon groaned and didn’t answer. They both knew what his answer was going to be- he wasn’t going to give up the heat. “...Do you sleep at all or is that another perk of yours too? Don’t think I’ve seen you actually sleep.”

Benrey made a noncommittal noise. “Kinda. It’s less ‘Unconscious’ and more ‘Hitting pause on a video game and taking a snack break’ you feel me?”

Gordon wasn’t entirely sure he understood what that meant for Benrey physically but he nodded anyways. “Think everyone else is okay?”

“Huh? Yeah of course.” Benrey snorted. “Not a single one of ‘em are fully human like you, they’ll be fine.”

“Right.” Gordon’s eyes drooped.

Benrey must’ve noticed because the next words out of his mouth were, “You gonna become Gordon Sleepman?”

“Maybe...” Gordon mumbled, eyes closing and refusing to open again. Benrey laughed but it got further and further away until Gordon slipped into a dreamless slumber.

—

Fighting by Benrey’s side took some of the usual stress away. Gordon knew that Benrey had his back, it became easy to relax a little and focus with him there.

The assassins were tough but with their power combined and a few explosives, it wasn’t hard to drive them away. Gordon had to take a breather afterwards, leaning up against the wall, but there was a smile plastered to his face. They were really doing this- they were going to get out of here alive.

God, Gordon couldn’t wait to see Joshua. He’d get an earful from his ex but he knew they meant well and would only be worried about him. Not to mention, Gordon wanted Benrey to meet Joshua. Something told him that they’d get along and Gordon wanted Benrey to be apart of that life.

“You good?” Benrey was looking over him carefully, eyeing a particularly nasty looking wound. “Lookin’ a little red there... In the face too.”

Gordon shook his head. “Just need a breather. And possibly a first aid kit.”

“I know where one is.” A new voice told them. Benrey and Gordon blinked and turned to the source. Gordon’s jaw dropped and his eyes lit up.

“Bubby! Dude, where- where have you been?”

Bubby seemed to shift in place. Something about him looked off, the look in his eyes, his arms crossed, the halting way he was talking- did he actually swallow before speaking? “Around.” Bubby said simply.

Gordon blinked. “You... You good, dude? You don’t seem yourself.”

“I’m fine, Gordon. Do you want a first aid kit or not?” Bubby snapped at him but his shoulders were tense.

Carefully, Gordon made his way over to him with Benrey on his heels. “That’d be great, thank you, Bubby.” Gordon paused, determining that stress seemed to be the answer and offered Bubby a hug.

Bubby took a step back. Gordon refused to take it personally. The guy looked like he was having a bad day. If he needed space, so be it. Gordon would be here when he was ready.

Benrey’s eyebrows raised at Bubby. “Where’s Coomer ‘n Tommy?” He asked slowly.

“...We got separated.” Bubby turned his back to them, moving forward. “Let’s just go already.”

The lack of expression alarmed Gordon. Did something happen? Why was Bubby acting so... Distant.

“You can tell us anything.” Gordon told Bubby. “We’re a team, no matter what.”

His offer fell on deaf ears.

Bubby stopped in front of what looked like a supply room. At the very end of the room laid a first aid kit, just as Bubby said. Gordon turned to Bubby and gave him a smile. “Hey. Thanks. I appreciate it.”

Bubby’s face dropped and while his mouth opened, no words came out.

Gordon entered the room, with Benrey following behind and Bubby in the back.

The lights went out.

—

The lights going out temporarily surprised Benrey until his night vision kicked in. Not a moment too soon either as soldiers suddenly surrounded Gordon and his stomach dropped.

Benrey was ready to lunge forward but arms wrapped around him and held him back. Benrey struggled until there was a voice in his ear.

“Don’t interfere or you’ll get hurt too.” Bubby hissed.

It wasn’t hard to figure out what had happened. Benrey turned his gaze to Bubby furiously, though Gordon’s cries in pain pierced his heart. “You- you did this?”

“I didn’t have a choice!” Bubby’s grip on him was tighter than iron. “You don’t know what they would’ve done!”

“I wouldn’t betray a friend, even if my life was on the line.” Benrey felt his form start to shift, getting less humanoid and more monstrous in his anger.

“It wasn’t my life!” His arms were shaking now. Benrey stopped.

Oh.

“How-” Benrey tried to say but Bubby cut him off.

“It doesn’t matter how.” Fear and fury leaked into his voice. “But I didn’t. Have. A choice.”

Benrey wanted to argue- he would’ve- but something else stopped him. Stopped them both in fact.

There was a soldier with a hunter’s knife and Gordon was screaming.

Bubby’s grip loosened enough for Benrey to break free, but Bubby didn’t seem to care when he did. Instead, his eyes were paralyzed. “I... They never said they were going to... Bastards.”

Benrey felt his form shift and grow before finally he made his attack.

He was too late to save Gordon’s arm but Benrey wrapped him in his own arms and bolted out of there. He looked back, only once, to watch Bubby burst into flames.

Benrey let his instincts guide him- out of Black Mesa, into the sun, and away from the soldiers. Nothing else around them except for a headcrab but Benrey sent one dirty look to it and it ran.

Gordon was bleeding- a lot. Too much- and missing an arm. Benrey could regrow those but Gordon was too human to do the same.

“G- Gordon?” Benrey said carefully. His breath hitched in his throat when his eyes cracked open, squinting. “Hey uh... You’re- you’re not gonna die, are you?”

Gordon paused for a long moment. Then he laughed to himself. “Benrey... Thanks. For getting- getting me out of there.”

“You- you’re good, right? Thinkpan still working? Got- got a lot more blood than this, right?”

Gordon blinked before nodding slightly. “I... Think so? It’s- it’s really hard to think right now. I think I should sleep... Man I- I really need a first aid kit now, huh?”

He laughed again. He kept doing that but Benrey didn’t get what was so funny. “Gordon?”

“You look- you look beautiful, you know that?” Gordon’s one good hand reached up and cupped his face. Benrey didn’t know how to deal with that, his mind was moving too quickly. “Your hair... You should take off your helmet more.”

“You- you don’t know what you’re sayin’...” Benrey stuttered.

“I mean every word.” Gordon stifled a snicker, eyes looking far away.

Benrey shook himself. He didn’t want to go back into Black Mesa but he needed to patch Gordon up before he passed out. Benrey was afraid of what would happen when he passed out. “Keep- keep on chattin’, okay? Stay with me, Gordon.”

Gordon laughed again but this one was softer. “You- you know, I really like it when you say my name. Sounds good when you- when you say it.”

Not actually flirting with you, he’s just delusional. Benrey told himself, keeping his focus as he carefully entered Black Mesa through a pipe. “That’s- that’s cool, Gordon. Uh, what else do you want to talk about?”

Gordon went silent. Benrey panicked. “G- Gordon? C’mon, stay with me, man.”

“What’ssss... What’s Pink to Gold mean?”

Benrey swallowed. Anything to keep him awake, right? “Pink to Gold... Means you’re a sight to behold.”

“Oh. Ohhhhhhh!” Gordon got a stupidly, cute grin on his face. It would’ve caused even more pink and gold sweet voice had Benrey not been stressing like he was. “Benny... Do you loveee me?”

“...I mean, isn’t it obvious?” Benrey thought it was. He was so very certain that Gordon knew. He finally spotted what he was looking for and sprinted over to it, setting Gordon down against the wall and taking it apart. “Stay still- I’m gonna help you, alright?”

Gordon didn’t resist but he did keep talking. “What’s obvious?”

“...I uh, care about you a lot, Gordon?”

Benrey wondered what Xen would say about him if they saw him now. The Great Benrey, running away from home and falling in love with a completely regular human. Except Gordon wasn’t really ordinary- he was... Everything. Funny, kind at heart, protective- a little stiff at times but he loosens up when he can relax. Not to mention, the guy had a great laugh and an even better face.

A face that had such a kind smile on it right now. Benrey wanted to protect that smile- no matter what. Gordon deserved to get out of here safely.

“I- I care about you too, Benny.”

Benrey swallowed. If it weren’t for the fact that Gordon wasn’t looking so hot right now, he might’ve really liked that nickname. Another time- if Gordon ever called him that again, that is.

“I’m gonna wrap this up, okay?” Benrey gestured to where his right arm used to be.

“Okay.” Gordon was still smiling, eyes half lided. “I trust you.”

Those three words went a long ways for Benrey. He shook his head and got to work. As soon as he was done, Gordon promptly passed out, his head against Benrey’s shoulder.

Gordon needed the rest. They’d figure out what came next later. Benrey would take care of him until then.

——

So. I might’ve gone a bit wild with the plot because I couldn’t stop thinking about how differently thing’s could’ve gone with the events in this AU so yEAH!

Hopefully it was good though! Made sure there was some softer moments as well as the darker one. How well I balanced it is up to y’all I suppose!

Thank you for the request! Hopefully Part Three won’t take as long!!

[ten0rreaper]

What Stays In Vegas

Summary: By all accounts, today should have been the happiest day in Gordon’s life, and he was spending it sobbing his eyes out on the floor of a dirty saloon room in his wedding dress.[takes place in @toonhlvrai on tumblr during season two in the part where everything goes wrong]

Notes:  So toonhlvrai ripped my heart out and stomped on it the other day and even though we've got some good things since this has been stuck in my head so I fuckin wrote it. Intended to take place between the end of the Uno game and Gordon's first appearance in his wedding dress. Title taken from “What Stays In Vegas...” by tumblr user @w1tchysounds, which I listened to on loop while writing this and which helped inspire it. Crossposted to ao3- link will be added in reblog.

Today, by all accounts, should have been the happiest day in Gordon’s life. He was deeply in love; he had proposed and been proposed to in return; he was getting married. His son was out there, ready with a ring to put on his fiancee’s finger, his father figure was there ready to wed him. Really, he wished that more of the people he loved could have been there, but thinking about that only made him sob harder.

Yes- by all accounts, today should have been the happiest day in Gordon’s life, and he was spending it sobbing his eyes out on the floor of a dirty saloon room in his wedding dress. 

In a way he felt rather detached from the whole thing, like it was happening to another person. It was hard not to feel like the world was horribly unreal, with the darkness outside and the stark purple light, the cartoonish recreation of the wild west, and a shotgun wedding. It will have happened to another person soon, Gordon thought vaguely, and his sobs turned hysterical. What would it feel like? Was it dying? Was he dying? Because it felt like it, the way he could barely choke down a single breath before it came heaving out in a strangled scream, the way his lungs burned and his throat crawled and he couldn’t stand if he tried as he attempted to pull on his pretty white (dust-stained) gloves with violently trembling hands. He could barely keep himself steady enough to begin to get his hand in, and something in that was hilarious. He was just glad that the room they had rented didn’t have a mirror, because he could picture easily what he looked like- a blubbering mess shaking like a child, face dark and blotchy and so far gone makeup couldn’t help if it would stay on, eyes red and swollen, dress and gloves and veil ruined with dirt, the hair he couldn’t tie tup properly falling all over his face, hunched over and holding on to himself for dear life- it would’ve just made him cry harder, somehow. He was keeping everyone waiting, he was wasting time, every second ticking away alone was a second he couldn’t afford to waste-

A gentle knock sounded on the door, so careful that it had Gordon freezing up, trying to draw in the breath to defend himself until he saw Coomer, peeking in sadly. 

“Hello, Gordon,” he said, as if approaching a grieving child. In a way, he wasn’t wrong. 

Gordon sucked in a breath, tried to force his throat to work, but all he could say in response was a pathetic, needy groan. 

Coomer didn’t need more prompting. He closed the door carefully, quietly behind him and kneeled at Gordon’s side, putting an arm around him. “There, there, Gordon,” he murmured, and wiped at Gordon’s eyes with a sleeve. “You’re not getting cold feet, are you?”

Gordon laughed. It was short, violent, felt like a sob, and likely sounded like one too, but it was a laugh nonetheless. “I wish,” he croaked, closing his eyes and leaning into Coomer’s touch. 

Coomer didn’t ask what was wrong. He didn’t need to. “Would you like some help?” He offered, and didn’t bring up even a single playcoin. Gordon sniffed, loud and ugly, and nodded. Fuck, yes, he needed help, he wouldn’t be able to get off this fucking floor without someone else there. Coomer simply nodded and got to work even as Gordon cried, carefully rolling his gloves up his arm, pulling his hair back into a bun with steady hands, fastening the collar around his neck with a tenderness Gordon wasn’t accustomed to seeing from any member of their team, much less Coomer. It was unnerving. It was everything. Coomer brushed off Gordon’s veil with useless determination before situating it into Gordon’s hair. He leaned back, brought a hand to his chin, and nodded. “There we are. You’re perfect, Gordon.”

“No I’m not.” Gordon tried to smile, but it strained and stretched on his face unnaturally. “Thanks anyway.”

Coomer puffed out his chest and crossed his arms in a shadow of his usual bravado. “Nonsense! What makes you say something like that?”

Gordon snorted, then sniffled. “Uh, my face? I can’t stop-” he laughed weakly and wiped at his face. “I can’t stop crying.”

“And what’s wrong with that?”

That startled the sobs into stillness for a moment. “Everything, Dr. Coomer. It’s- it’s my wedding day, and I want to spend the last time we have fucking enjoying it, with each other, and making these memories good, but I just- I can’t stop crying.” Gordon hunched in on himself once more, struggling in vein to keep his lungs from heaving once more. He would wipe his face, but that would ruin the gloves. They were already tainted enough with the dust. So much dust.

Coomer settled his hands lightly over where Gordon’s were balling into the skirt of his dress. “You don’t have to put on a strong face, you know,” he said. “I doubt there will be a single dry eye in the building. You don’t have to pretend it’s alright.”

“You seem pretty okay.”

“Oh, I’m definitely not!” Coomer grinned brightly. “But, well, I’ve dealt with a feeling quite similar before. Pretending it’s not there… it won’t help, Gordon. If you’re sad, and full of dread, if you’re around the people you love at least you can be sad together. It’s comforting, Gordon. Sometimes love is, well… sadness and comfort.”

“...I don’t want to forget,” Gordon whispered. “I don’t want to die. I want to, to grow old with Benrey and raise Joshua and- fuck, I just want to be happy. But we won’t get that. We don’t even know what’ll happen to us, or if we’ll even be us once this is all over. And I hate that I can’t even know.”

Coomer said nothing- because, really, what was there to say? He just reached up to lay a hand on Gordon’s cheek, then pulled him into a hug. Gordon collapsed into it and held on as long as Coomer would let him, until his violent shaking was reduced to shivers and he could breathe through the tears and something in him felt warm again.

“I’m sorry I failed,” he said.

“You didn’t,” said Coomer.

With that, Coomer stood and pulled Gordon to his feet. “Now, off the floor with you! Between you and me, I heard that dress cost a fortune, and it wouldn’t do to ruin it!”

Gordon snorted. “I think we’re well past that.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about!” Coomer smiled and held his elbow out to Gordon. There had been no plans to walk him down the aisle, but, well, Gordon’s legs felt weak and still trembled like a newborn deer’s, so he looped his arm around Coomer’s and smiled back in thanks. If he was going to die, ego or soul or body or mind, Gordon was going to die surrounded by his family with a ring on his finger and a kiss on his lips. And maybe, said a weak ember of hope sheltered deep inside of his heart, maybe it would be enough to lead them back to one another after the final day ended.

[lakesandquarries]

Baby Shoes - Chapter 2

Bubby has been a doctor at Black Mesa for 20 years, living there for 50. He’s been bouncing around from project to project, working on whatever needs most help. He doesn’t have any opinions on his work or his coworkers or anything like that, preferring to keep to himself.

Then he meets Black Mesa’s newest project.

AKA: Bubby is Benrey’s dad au.

title from “Baby Shoes” by Bad Books.

AO3 Link

He stays away from the Biological Research department for three whole days before curiosity gets the best of him. Work is the only thing that’s a suitable distraction, and his current work is frustratingly easy. He’s supposed to be moved around departments, placed on whatever project is most difficult, but currently he’s just helping design a new line of robotic limbs. It’s almost an insult, frankly.

He tests the springs on the arm one last time, determines that there’s nothing more he can do today, and leaves.

The trip to Biological Research is a short one, but once he’s there he’s reminded of how confusing it is. The scientists seem less frazzled today, at least. He winds up in a hall filled with desks, some kind of office space perhaps? Most of them are empty or occupied by very stressed looking scientists, but he spots one young man with blond hair sitting at a desk playing with a slinky, and makes his way over.

“Excuse me,” Bubby says, clearing his throat. The young man straightens up, accidentally launching his slinky across the room.

“Oh, shit,” he mumbles as it narrowly avoids hitting someone.

“You might wanna pick that up before someone trips on it. Or, don’t, it’ll be good entertainment.”

The man snorts as he stands up, grabbing his slinky and dusting it off. “Maybe. Not worth risking my job if the wrong person slips.” He holds his hand out to Bubby. “Dr. Dekkard.”

Bubby shakes it warily. “Dr. Bubby.” Dekkard’s eyes widen, and his grip tightens.

“Oh, shit! You’re the -”

“Ultimate Lifeform, yes.” He smiles at Dekkard, showing off his slightly sharper than average teeth.

“Damn, what - what are you doing here? I was told you were working in the Robotics Department.” He releases Bubby’s hand, shoving his own into the pocket of his lab coat, the other still fiddling with the slinky.

“I am. I get curious.”

“I dunno, most of the sh - uh, stuff here is pretty boring.”

“You can swear, Dr. Dekkard. We’re all adults here.” Probably. Dekkard has the look of someone too young to be working at Black Mesa, still innocent and excited about the possibilities of science. The spark in his eyes will be gone soon enough. “I had...an encounter here, the other day. There was a subject that escaped, apparently?”

Dekkard nods. “Yeah, XEN-3. Don’t know much about it - some kinda shapeshifting alien? It’s supposed to be really dangerous, though. Bit a scientist a while back and nearly killed the guy.” He shrugs, taking his hand out of his pocket so he can move the slinky between both hands. “I only started here a month ago, I don’t know much about it. It keeps trying to escape though, the guys in charge are pretty pissed.”

Bubby purses his lips, thinking. “Maybe they need a new perspective. A better perspective. Who’s in charge?”

“Dr. Zeki. She’s - I think she’s free right now? I can show you where her office is.”

“Yes, please do.” Bubby straightens his lab coat. Dekkard drops the slinky on his desk before leading Bubby down one of the many identical corridors. They stop after reaching a door with a plaque attached to it.

Dr. Amelia Zeki, Head of Biological Research.

Dekkard knocks on the door. “Dr. Zeki? I’ve got someone who wants to see you.”

There’s a sigh on the other side. “Send them in.”

“Alright, well. Good luck. Uh, nice meeting you. I’ll see you around?”

“Maybe,” Bubby says. He hopes he doesn’t. He hopes Dekkard quits within the next 20 minutes and finds somewhere else to work that isn’t this shit hole.

He opens the door to Zeki’s office.

Behind the desk, looking over a stack of papers, is the same woman he saw the other day. The one who shot Benrey in front of him. This is the same person in charge of their well being?

“Well?” Zeki asks, looking up at him. “I assume there’s a reason you’re here, but I’m busy. I don’t have time to wait for you to say something.”

“I had a few questions. About the - the subject I encountered the other day.”

“XEN-3?” She puts the papers down. “Did it bite you or something? If so, you’re gonna need antibiotics immediately, it -”

“It didn’t hurt me,” Bubby says sharply. “I only encountered it briefly, but it seemed perfectly docile.”

“You’d better hope you don’t encounter it again, then, because I doubt you’ll get that lucky twice.”

“That’s what I came here to ask about, actually. I’m - well, the current project I’m working on is far below my usual standard. I’m hoping to find something more...challenging.”

Zeki raises an eyebrow. “And you want to deal with the violent shapeshifting alien?”

“It’s certainly a challenge, isn’t it?”

She looks back at her papers, tapping her chin thoughtfully. “We have it pretty heavily restrained at the moment, and it would be nice to have someone who can interact with it without getting attacked.” She pushes her chair back from the table and stands up. “I can’t believe I’m doing this. Fine. You can come see it.”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet.”

How does anyone find their way around this place? The hall Zeki takes Bubby down is identical to every other god damn hallway in this shitty department. She leads him into a room with a large glass partition, separating the subject from the scientists. One-way glass, he assumes. Bubby steps forward to get a better look, and his blood goes cold.

There’s no cage like he’d seen a few days ago. This is an entirely new enclosure, a different room than before.

It’s worse. They replaced the cage with heavy chains and shackles. The presumably cold metal clamped around Benrey's wrists, ankles, waist, with even their tiny neck being held by the restraints They’re flopped over, the chains the only thing keeping them upright, and their eyes are open but vacant.

“Are - are they alive? ”

Zeki nods. “Thing won’t stay dead. No matter what we throw at it, it just heals itself. Total reset.”

“I -” he wants to strangle her. He thinks back to just a few days ago, Benrey clinging to his shirt, impossibly grateful for the simple gift of a name.

“It’s not sentient,” Zeki says. “It just imitates what it sees. It’s not like you , Dr. Bubby.”

But it is. It’s exactly like him. He remembers days spent floating listlessly in his tube, wishing for something, anything to happen. Even some kind of experiment, because at least then he wouldn’t be alone. Days spent slamming against the glass in a feeble attempt to break it.

He swallows down the words he wants to say. “If they’re a shapeshifter, how are chains supposed to keep it in place?” Bubby asks, stepping away from the glass and forcing himself to look away.

“It’s not impossible, but it’s harder. We keep the cuffs tight so it can’t expand without hurting itself, and getting smaller seems to be more difficult somehow. It’s only a temporary solution, though. We’ve been hoping to study the shapeshifting better, but it’s tricky.”

“I understand you also have an...escaping problem.”

She clenches her jaw, muscles in her neck twitching. “Only a few times.”

“Over how long?”

“Five. Five times in three months.”

“Hm.” Bubby steps forward, touching a hand to the glass, then walks a slow circle around the room. “There might be a better way to prevent it from escaping.”

Zeki sighs, rubbing her temples. “Fine. Let’s hear your idea.”

“You could always try to improve its living situation. Give it some incentive to stay.”

She shakes her head. “Its first cage was fine . It’s just being difficult.”

“I know you said it’s not sentient, but -”

“It’s just mimicking us. It doesn’t understand what it says, or what it does, or any of that. It’s from Xen. All it wants to do is kill and eat, and sometimes that means a little bit of acting.”

“It must’ve chosen this form for a reason. Humans are, to put it plainly, shittily designed when it comes to killing and eating. So why not try treating it like a human?”

Zeki eyes him again, studying him as intensely as he’s seen her stare at Benrey. “You’ve got some kind of attachment to it.”

“I find it interesting. It’s more of a challenge than robotic arms. ”

Another long moment as Zeki stares at him. “You know what? Sure. Fine. I’ll clear it with the head of Robotics, see if we can borrow you over here. I’ll give it a try. But Mr. Bubby, I do hope you remember your place here.”

“That’s Doctor Bubby,” he snaps, straightening up to his full height. He’s nearly a full head taller than her, yet can’t shake the feeling of being looked down on.

“Like I said. I hope you remember your place.”

[newtafterdark]

Taste of Metal - Chapter 8: A Lecture on Trespassers

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26157634/chapters/65517814

Summary: What if the overwhelming VR experience Gordon went through, had a deeper purpose than just being a simple simulation & a freelance debug job for him?

But most importantly- what if Gordon Freeman listens to Metal & used to be in a band? aka. the “Metalhead Gordon AU”

- - -

Gordon had to admit that it had been a while since he organized such a big breakfast. It brought his years at MIT back to mind where he and his roommates somehow collectively managed to keep each other on their feet, food included.

 But his worries over the possible mediocrity of what he, Dr Coomer and Bubby might have created - with him being the only one who had actual physical experience with cooking - went right out the window when he saw the looks of amazement and gratefulness at the table.

 Despite having said that he needed neither sleep nor food, Benrey had stacked his plate with a bit of everything that had been brought on the table. If he had been any other person, Gordon would have been concerned. But it was likely that everyone at the table either hadn’t had a proper meal in quite a while or had never had the chance to have one before.

 So when Benrey was carefully layering a pancake with ham, a fried egg, cheese and peanut butter, Gordon just watched with a soft amused smile. 

 Meanwhile, Tommy was losing his mind over the concept of Nutella-Banana toast.

“I-I can’t believe I missed out on this! They never had anything like this at the Black Mesa cafeteria!”

 Gordon chuckled.

 “Doesn’t surprise me, bud. But now you can have that every day if you want.”, he added with an assuring smile.

 Tommy nodded in excitement, already in the process of making another Nutella-covered toast, exchanging his left-over banana slices for Darnold’s strawberries.

 Darnold added the banana to his honey wheat cereal in thought, then looked up to meet Gordon’s gaze.

 “Apologies in advance for prying, Gordon… but I do have a question, If you don’t mind.”

 Gordon blinked over the edge of his mug, cutting the sip of hot cacao short.

 “Sure, man! What’s up?”

 “Well… I recalled your reaction from last night when Bubby talked about exploring the world outside. You seemed… alarmed. Why?”

 Gordon set his mug down, brows furrowed as he looked at his plate. He figured he’d have to tell the Science Team about the outside world eventually...

 “It isn’t as safe as you’d think, guys.”

 “No place is ‘safe’, Gordon.”, Bubby scoffed while cutting his omelette into bite-sized pieces.

 “I am aware, but this is… simulation levels of ‘not safe’.”, Gordon clarified.

 “What do you mean, Gordon? D-Do you guys had natural disasters recently? We understand! We can deal with stuff like that! No worries-”, Tommy threw in, but Gordon held up his hand. 

 “Let me… go get my laptop. I need you guys to know what’s going on.”

 With that said, Gordon got up and went into his bedroom, missing the confused glances the Science Team exchanged among each other. 

 When he returned, Gordon set up his projector and plugged the connection cable into his laptop. He let out a sigh, then opened a folder on his desktop.

 “Alright, welcome to class 101 of ‘Gordon explains what the fuck has been going on on Earth that shit’s fucked up outside’...”, he said, adjusting his glasses and getting into lecture mode. 

 He watched as the Science Team huddled closer to each other at the table, curiously looking at the projection on the wall… but still keeping at it with the breakfast. Gordon smiled softly before reminding himself of what he was doing. 

 “... August 10th, 2013. San Francisco. We thought it was a 7.1 earthquake at first. Bad enough to begin with… but then the video feeds and photos got to the news...”

 The Science Team watched with high attention as Gordon opened up a video file of a news recording. 

 The Golden Gate bridge was swinging dangerously in clear view- until the camera focused on something else.

 Something huge. 

 Something absolutely massive. 

 What emerged from the waters could only be described as a leviathan of a monster. It tore the bridge down with ease and almost instantly made its way towards the city, dragging itself through the water completely unphased by the military attacking it with comparably small aerial strikes. 

 “We called it “Trespasser” since it was the first of its kind we were forced to face.”, Gordon added, his voice sounding heavy with memories.

 The video ended and Gordon turned back, facing his friends. 

 Tommy had his hands covering his mouth in shock, Darnold was holding Sunkist oh-so-gently with horror in his eyes, Bubby was clawing at the table as he stared with wide eyes and even Dr Coomer sat there with concern in his face. 

 The last person Gordon expected to be shocked by this though, was Benrey, who looked positively mortified. 

 “Dude, w-what the FUCK?”, he managed to stutter out.

 “Y-You say it was the ‘first”? There were m-more?!”, Tommy asked.

 Gordon just nodded at that. 

 “The next one arrived 6 months later in Manila-”

 “Six months… that was barely time to rebuild the other city...”, Dr Coomer mused, more to himself than to the others.

 “Then came another one 4 months later in Cabo San Lucas-”

 “They were arriving faster???”, Bubby exclaimed with horror.

 Gordon nodded, pulling up pictures after pictures, playing videos to put emphasis on the seriousness of the whole ordeal. 

 “It was a disaster… We faced smaller ones than Trespasser occasionally… but the big ones got even bigger over time. We faced several each year until only recently. As you can imagine, Earth is still very much damaged in a lot of places because of this. Some areas are completely uninhabitable because of the acidic and poisonous nature of the Kaiju remains-”

 Benrey almost chocked on a piece of bacon-

 “You guys called them ‘Kaiju’??? Like, uh- Godzilla? Big Lizard???”

 Gordon let out a soft chuckle.

 “Yeah… one of the lead scientists behind the research of these beasts is a massive nerd. At first, he only called them that at work to differentiate the samples he got… then the names actually stuck over time in the official reports.”

 Coomer raised his hand.

 “Gordon, how did humanity fight these beasts? It looks like the military was once again absolutely useless!”

 Gordon clicked through his files, looking positively excited to show off whatever humanity's defence system had been- 

 “So, uhm, before I click play… basically humanity got together and formed the Pan-Pacific Defense Corps or PPDC for short. Within the PPDC was the research division… and that included the scientists and engineers who worked on these-”

 What the team saw next in the projection, made several of them gasp in excitement and astonishment.

 The video showed a dragon-like kaiju getting absolutely wrecked by what could only be described as a massive robot.

 “ARE YOU KIDDING ME???”, Bubby exclaimed.

 “Yooooo, what the fuuuuuuuck, man...”, Benrey added, holding his head in his hands, eyes still glued to the projection.

 “This… h-how-”, stammered Darnold, staring in awe.

 “Oh, that is quite the fine work of robotics, Gordon! Very sturdy by the looks of it!”, Dr Coomer observed, giving an approving nod, “So you used these to defeat the kaiju in one-on-one fights?”

 “Well, if we could, we had more Jaeger facing one Kaiju- and yes, my nerd buddy at the PPDC also named the class of the robots.”, Gordon clarified with a chuckle. 

 Tommy perked up at that.

 “That man is your friend, Gordon? Can we meet him?”

 “Well, I haven’t talked to Newton in quite some time… and not with Hermann either… I could e-mail them and ask where they’re stationed so we could meet and catch up? Heh… yeah, I should do that. Newt especially would love you guys!”

 Meanwhile, Bubby leaned back in his chair, arms crossed and glaring at the images still being projected.

 “So… the reason it’s dangerous outside is that these things could pop up anywhere at any moment?”, he asked.

 Gordon made a so-so motion with his hand. 

 “Not quite. The Breach, that’s what we called the portal to their world, was closed not too long ago… but we still deal with the damages and the toxic kaiju remains...”

 Gordon pulled up a photo of an entire coastline glowing in an unnatural blue in broad daylight. 

 “We call this ‘Kaiju Blue’... the closest comparison I could make is that it’s… like acidic oil-like blood. Basically don’t get near any of this at any point. Compared to it, the Green Sludge back in Black Mesa was just a glow-in-the-dark kiwi slushie.”

 That comment earned Gordon a few chuckles and amused huffs.

 “But yes… this is the main reason I want you all to be careful when we go outside. The PPDC still studies what the fuck this stuff can do to a human body… and I don’t want to find out what it might do to you guys. Just… no slurping the toxic alien juice, please?”, Gordon pleaded.

 To his surprise, the team gave him assuring nods.

 “Gordon, normally I would say that you’d be a party pooper… but since we’re all new to this terrifying information, be assured that we will listen. After all, you’re now the specialist!”, Dr Coomer said with a smile.

 Gordon’s tense shoulders relaxed at the reassurance. This was a welcome change from what he had been used to from the Science Team in the simulation.

 “Thanks, guys. I… I know this is a lot to take in- and please take your time to process it! - but I just… I needed you guys to be aware.”

 “Oh, it’s alright, Gordon! I-I think it will slowly sink in over a few days, right guys?”, Tommy asked, turning to the others at the table.

 “I’m already done processing… but we need your laptop for more research, Gordon. I want to know more details on that whole disaster before I take even one step outside.”, Bubby muttered before sipping on his now cold coffee.

 “Of course! And don’t be afraid to ask me about anything, related or unrelated to all this! Honestly, the more I can help with you guys being prepared for the outside world, the better I feel about our whole situation.”

 Gordon turned off the projector for the time being and sat back down at the table.

 “And, uh… thank you all for listening and letting me explain? I’m not used to that from you guys… but yeah, thanks.”, he said with a weak but grateful smile.

 Darnold reached over, putting a hand on his shoulder, while his other hand was still gently petting Sunkist. 

 “Hey, know that we’ll always listen to you from now on. The simulation was one thing… but this is reality. I think I speak for everyone when I say that while bantering with you is álways fun, we won’t push your buttons to a frustrating level anymore. Especially while you’re still recovering.”

 Gordon simply nodded at that, playing with the rim of his shirt. 

 Suddenly, he stood up once more, startling Darnold slightly.

 “Gordon, a-are you okay?”, the mixologist asked.

 Gordon nodded, looking quite serious all of the sudden.

 “I… I want you guys to meet someone.”

 Benrey visibly perked up.

 “Oh shit!- is it son time? Haven’t seen him around so… uh… road trip to go see Gordon Jr?”

 “I can’t wait to meet your son, Gordon!”, Dr Coomer chimed in.

 “W-Well, we don’t need to go anywhere to meet him… uhm… give me a second, I just need to go get my closet key-”

 “CLOSET KEY???”, gasped Tommy in shock.

 “TOMMY, DON’T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT IT WILL MAKE SENSE IN A SECOND I SWEAR!”, Gordon yelled back while he was scrambling to find his keys.

 The entire team watched in a mix of judgement, curiosity and excitement as Gordon unlocked the storage closet that Benrey had sat on top of earlier that morning. 

 They saw his anxious expression completely melt away to make way for a loving gaze as he pulled out something orb-shaped from within the closet depths.

 A sleepy chirp-like sound suddenly emerged from what Gordon was holding.

 “Hey… ‘morning, bud. Dad’s finally back home...”, Gordon said with the most gentle voice any of the Science Team members had ever heard him speak with.

 Another chirp, this time a bit louder-

 “....dad? DAD! YOU’RE BACK!!!!”

 Suddenly the orb-shaped object launched itself out of Gordon’s arms and flew in rapid circles around him, making the man laugh. He reached out and pulled the orb out of the air, hugging it close. 

 “I am! Hey, uhm… dad brought some friends over. They are really excited to meet you. Do you want to go say hello to them?”, he asked gently. 

 The Science Team watched in anticipation as Gordon walked back to the table, arms wrapped protectively around something that was as big as volley-ball.

 Tommy gasped softly as he leaned over to get a better look.

 A small screen on the orb slowly came into view, displaying a curious little face consisting of numbers and symbols. 

 Two appendages, seemingly constructed in part out of computer mice, pulled the small being further up as it looked warily over Gordon’s arm at the Science Team.

 Gordon smiled proudly at the display of mutual curiosity. 

 “Everyone… meet Joshua.”

[froggycatvest]

Title: Family means no one gets left behind Word Count: 2000 Ship: None Warnings: None Characters: Gordon, Benrey, Bubby, Dr. Coomer, Tommy

Gordon couldn’t believe he was doing this. Every other time Benrey had died, the group left him behind. Carrying around dead weight--literal dead weight--maybe wasn’t the best idea.

“Hey, maybe this wasn’t the best idea,” he said, a forced cheerfulness in his voice as he stopped his stride when he felt Benrey’s dead body sliding off his back to one side. Gordon huffed and adjusted his grip to keep him on.

“But Gordon,” Dr. Coomer replied, running in front of him to face him, “It’s for science, you said.”

In exasperation, Gordon immediately groaned out, “I know I said it was for science.”

Maybe he sounded like he was whining, but it had been the only way he could convince them to let him bring Benrey along. Not saying it didn’t become funny after a while hearing Dr. Coomer and Bubby be so flippant about the man dying after so many times, but...wasn’t anyone curious?

Sometimes, Benrey came back immediately, running after them around a corner. Sometimes, they didn’t see him for hours. Asking him how or why wouldn’t net a straight answer, so he had to see for himself. So the next time Benrey had keeled over like a ragdoll, Gordon hauled him with them.

“Any of you want to take a turn?” he asked jokingly. The suit helped give him the strength to trudge around with extra weight, but there were aliens and radiation and obstacles, and, really, he just wanted to rest. It probably hadn’t even been twenty minutes, but Gordon was ready to order a sit down with everyone to wait this out with Benrey.

Dr. Coomer broke through his thoughts with a hum. “A man resting on my back?” He crouched and began to shuffle away, lost in thought. “Oh, that takes me back.” he said with nostalgia. He had gotten too far for Gordon to respond to with more than a confused noise in his throat.

Then he felt Benrey breathe.

The chest against his back moved, and the air against his shoulder was warm.

Oh. So he did just come back in the same body. It wasn’t like leaving a trail of dead ones behind like some sort of messed up breadcrumb guide. Gordon was happy, though. Even if Benrey was the worst--antagonistic and able to press his buttons like no one else--more manpower was always a plus, and sometimes the man was amusing, his dumb comments cutting through tense moments and making him laugh.

Gordon tilted his head in an attempt to speak directly at him. “Are you good?”

His answer was an immediate groan.

He grinned. “Yeah, that sounds about right. If I let you go, can you stand?”

The groans continued on into a lower guttural rumble like he was dying all over again.

“...All right, someone get him off.”

Bubby rushed in, weapon drawn, and Gordon sputtered out at him, “Would you put your gun away?”

“You said off him.”

“I said--” Gordon stopped and sighed. Why bother? They were always twisting his words and refusing to listen to him correctly. “And if the bullet went through to me, too?”

“You’d be offed,” Bubby said matter-of-fact, running away.

Gordon watched him go, a blank expression on his face. It was really the way the other man made it sound like he was an idiot for not knowing the obvious when he was actually being sarcastic--which Gordon knew was on purpose since Bubby was the most sarcastic of the bunch.

He couldn’t help but point that out. “You’re a...you’re kind of a smartass, aren’t you?”

Bubby ran up to him again with his gun outward. “What was that?”

...Yeah, all right. Maybe he was a bit of an idiot to insult Bubby, of all people. And the way he was just so nonchalant about having his finger on the trigger at all times didn’t help.

Gordon gave him a placating smile. “You’re…so smart, Dr. Bubby.”

Bubby nodded, his gun disappearing. “Dang right.” He moved to grip one of Benrey’s arms, Tommy rushing in to his other side.

“Careful. Legs don’t work well when you’re dead.”

Bubby raised an eyebrow. “What are you talking about? They don’t work at all when you’re dead.”

“Guys, guys. He’s not dead.” Gordon slowly let go of Benrey’s legs one at a time in case he was still waking up. It was strange that he hadn’t moved yet, but it was probably for the best. Hearing his mocking words was grating enough, but if he had to hear it right in his ear, he would absolutely lose his temper and drop him.

“He’s fine now. Aren’t you, Benrey?”

The weight abruptly left his back with the sound of someone stumbling, and Gordon whipped around in case he needed to help catch him, but the other two held him up.

“See?” Tommy said with a smile and a knowing look towards Bubby. “They don’t work well.”

“Shut up, Tommy.”

“Hey, hey.” Gordon waved his hand at Bubby. “Be nice.”

It seemed to take a moment for Benrey to realize what was going on and to stand fully on his own. When he did, Bubby bounded away, muttering something about being nice. Gordon sighed. “Thank you, Tommy.” When the other man ran off on his own as well, Gordon glanced over Benrey. “Just like new then?”

Benrey stared like he always did, before his eyes narrowed, palm coming up to rub against where his face had been pressed into Gordon’s shoulder.

“Oh what happened?”

At least he sounded the same as he always did. Gordon nodded, satisfied.

“Just a little detour. We’re ready to move on.”

But Benrey didn’t move, didn’t stop staring, didn’t take his hand away from his face. “Yeah what happened?”

The unbreaking eye contact usually got to him, making Gordon shift on the spot. “It’s nothing.” Hey, if Benrey didn’t realize he had been piggybacked around for a bit, then he didn’t need to be told. “You’re imagining things.”

Dr. Coomer sprinted into the conversation. “That’s because we carried you around like a sleeping princess.” He began to crouch-walk away again, lost in thought. “Oh, that takes me back,” he said with nostalgia.

Gordon opened his mouth, but wasn’t able to decide whether to quickly deny the true claim or address whatever the heck Dr.Coomer was talking about concerning his...whatever the hell it was. Bubby helped to make the decision when he spoke, voice raised from down the hallway.

“It was Gordon’s idea. Wouldn’t let us continue on without you. I don’t understand why.”

“Bubby,” Gordon whined. They were ganging up on him. This wasn’t fair. “I told you before. It was for--” He broke off when Benrey pushed his words into the conversation.

“You were doing bad?”

Gordon felt the air sucked in through his teeth and tightening up his chest. Benrey sounded so innocent there, as if he were genuinely confused and asking if it were truly true. But Gordon had heard it so many times before that he was on the defensive immediately, full attention on the other man, and his voice coming out in a rush.

“Why do you always think I’m doing bad?” he demanded, and then pointed at him, shoulders raising. “When are you going to get over your neverending suspicions of me? Out of all of us, I have nothing to hide!”

Benrey stared at the hand in front of him. “Huh?”

“You know what?” Gordon breathed out, waving him off, already drained and stance falling. “I was just doing something good, something nice. Keeping you safe. Bubby was right. I don’t know why I would do that.”

Bubby apparently agreed. “I’m always right.”

Gordon called out to him. “And I will listen to you from now on, because--”

He stopped when Benrey began to step here and there, strafing into his vision at his side while muttering something. Gordon could get mad easily, but he could also calm down just as quickly, whether something distracted him or something confused him or someone was moving around near him.

He held a hand up to motion him to stand still. “What?”

Benrey faced him. “You’re always.”

“I’m always what?”

“You hide things.”

Gordon was going to walk away. He had turned to address the others, ready to say they were heading out right this moment, but Benrey spoke over him quickly.

“You didn’t answer me earlier. That’s hiding things.”

...Well...Dang it. That was true. All right, all right. He was man enough to admit that.

“Maybe you’re right,” Gordon said, his arms crossing before he shrugged his shoulders. “But it’s not a big deal. I was just going to say we carried you around for observation.”

The change in Benrey was immediate.

Benrey’s stride brought him unnervingly close. “Observing? You’re observing me?” And Gordon had to take a step back, his hands up and protesting at the sudden accusing tone.

“You make it sound bad,” he complained. It always caught him off guard the way he did that, the way he apparently didn’t understand personal space, the way he followed and just would not stop.

“Oh, yes,” Bubby called out to Benrey. “Like a little microscope specimen.”

“That makes it sound worse!” Gordon cried out, using the opportunity to round on the scientist, stalking up to him and putting some distance between himself and Benrey. “Should we have left him dead and alone instead?”

“That’s what we said to do,” Bubby quipped as he sat down and stared up at him. “But you don’t listen.”

Gordon made a noise of amusement. “I don’t listen?” That was a good one. Did anyone listen to anyone else around here? He gestured around him. “Every single one of you--I mean, god, he’s right there.” His hand swept towards Benrey. “You’re just going to say we should have abandoned him right in front of him?”  

“I died?”

Benrey hadn’t moved, but Gordon was thrilled that maybe they would get somewhere in this conversation. “Yes. Yes, you died. You die many times. Shot at, blown up, electrocuted. I’ve lost count after a while. ”

When the silence in the area stretched for more than the usual time it would take to get a response, Gordon frowned and asked carefully, “Did you not know?”

Benrey broke eye contact, looking around at the walls, the floor, anywhere but at him. Normally, he’d have something to say, even if it didn’t make sense. Or he’d walk away and run around to get away from him. But the way he stood so still...Was he actually thinking about this? Was this an existential crisis? Would Gordon finally not be the only one to have a breakdown in this godforsaken place?

When Benrey started mumbling something out, it was a bit of a relief. “Is that why it hurts?”

Gordon looked him over. “Where?”

“Everywhere.”

“Uhh, probably.”

Seeing as he never mentioned being in pain after coming back to life before, it actually might have been because Gordon had chucked his dead body to the ground a few times in a fit of desperation to defend himself when aliens targeted him in a scuffle. But he wasn’t about to mention that.

...Tommy, though. Tommy, though…

“No, that was when Mr. Freeman dropped you,” Tommy said helpfully, before his tone lowered, sounding a little sad for some reason. “He did that a lot.”

“Tommy.”

And Benrey was back to normal, getting all up in Gordon’s face. “Why did you do that?” He stepped in even closer. “Why would you do that?”

“Oh my god.” Gordon leaned away, exasperated. “Everyone else was right. I should have just left you dead on the floor back there.”

Tommy was the first to protest, “But that’s mean,” he said, as Dr. Coomer came up to admonish him.

“Now, Gordon. We’re a team. And we don’t leave team members behind.”

“What is wrong with you?” Bubby joined in sounding scandalized, and Gordon slipped past all of them, already used to...everything. All of this. Whatever all of this was.

“We really need to make up for lost time, guys,” he said, leading the way and already putting all of this behind him. “Let’s go.”

[goatbi]

The Riverbank Chapter Eleven

It was a quaint little coffee shop. One that none of them had seen before, though simply by having never been in the area. It was one of those places Tommy loved to take them all on dates, when they would hold a table for hours, only keeping from annoying the employees too much by getting drinks often, or cake pops that they had hidden. 

Of course, Darnold was here alone this time, one simple coffee set in front of her at the two person table, book up to her face. She wasn’t reading anything on the pages, unfortunately, but still turned the pages carefully as if she was. This is where she would sit for the moment, as it was the only place that any of them knew that the other stars would go. 

Hopefully they were right and they would come back. Darnold certainly hoped so. She also let herself hope that this would all be over soon enough, so they could come back here, make better memories than this, sitting here in silence and hoping that Benrey was still okay enough for this little trap to be worth it. 

Someone in the corner of her eye entered the shop. She barely glanced over, but they froze, before turning and leaving again. Darnold said nothing, hoping that that didn’t mean they knew and were going to leave, move spots, ruin this on the second day of trying to get them in. 

Three page turns later, someone sat down in the chair across from her. She didn’t look up for a moment, but lowered the book carefully, eyes darting towards it. 

It wasn’t the same person that had come in before. She knew that well enough. It stared back at her quietly, eyes narrowed, before the world went grey around them. Darnold’s eyes flicked across it’s face, noting the bruise blooming across it’s cheek. Yellow eyes bored into her, and finally, finally, she made eye contact. 

“Capella.” Careful, measured. It knew what it was doing giving it’s name to her. Darnold simply smiled back. 

“Darnold.” She replied instead, setting her book down on the table in front of her, pushing the forgotten coffee to the side in order to do it. Capella stared at her quietly, unblinking. Darnold simply stared back. She was used to G-Man’s slightly off existence, not to mention she was dating Tommy. It wasn’t like the unblinking thing freaked her out anymore. 

Capella frowned after a moment, seeming to realize this, and sat back, pushing it’s feet against the table legs to balance on the back two. “So. Who knows you’re here.” 

At this Darnold looked away, trying to look nervous. It must have worked, as the chair clunked back to the ground. 

“No one?” Capella seemed to purr, and Darnold glared at it, halfheartedly, then shifted to look closer, eyes focusing on the bruise on it’s face. 

“Are you alright?” Capella jerked back, eyes going wide. “I mean, that looks pretty bad. I thought that... stars could heal that sort of thing.” Darnold tilted her head slightly, almost innocently, and Capella glared at her. 

“Fuck off.” 

“It was just a question. I didn’t... mean to upset you.” Not to that extent at least. Darnold wondered idly if stars could fix damage done by other stars. Maybe that was it. Dissent in the ranks perhaps? Or... something worse. She shook it off, and Capella leaned forwards again. 

“Is this a negotiation? For your little abomination back?” Control. That’s what it wanted here, but even so, the name that it gave Benrey brought a tidal wave of anger. 

“Perhaps the people of earth see you as the abomination.” She said instead of screaming, lifting her cup to take a sip carefully. “I know they aren’t, however.”

Capella seemed to give up then, standing and grabbing Darnold’s arm with a burning grip, dragging her bodily from the seat. The coffee teetered for a moment, but steadied, as it and the book were left behind. Darnold stumbled behind it for a moment, but managed to find her footing, putting up a struggle, though knowing that she couldn’t break free from it’s grasp. She was dragged through the portal, all without Capella noticing Bubby and Coomer stationed across the street. 

It dragged her through, and she stumbled into a building, almost warehouse like. Her eyes darted around quickly, trying to take everything in at once, trying to see it all, in order to tell them later, as Capella dragged her through the building. 

“Acrturus! Guess what I found!” It called, and stopped just outside a door. When it opened, Capella didn’t go in, but instead, Arcturus stepped out carefully. With the pure white eyes, Darnold couldn’t tell who he was looking at, but she knew it wasn’t good, even before the grin split across his face. 

“Oh wonderful. Looks like you haven’t failed me after all.” It hit Darnold all at once, eyes flickering between them, but she didn’t speak, as Arcturus carefully cupped Capella’s face, right over the bruise the same size. “Good job, darling.” He turned his head, just barely, to look at Darnold, then moved his hand from Capella’s face to hers, thumb on her chin, forcing her head up to look him in the eyes. “Another of their little group, I assume?” He asked, and Capella nodded. 

“I think so. Seemed to know the abomination.” Darnold held back the snarl, kept herself calm. Arcturus seemed to be searching for something, and whether or not he found it was something Darnold didn’t know. He simply drew back, hand falling from her face, the spot he touched burning. 

“Put them together. It might be nice to see what we’ve done to your precious nuisance.” Capella dragged her off, and Darnold stumbled to keep up with her, forcing her gaze away from him. 

When she was pushed into the room, she chose to land on her left, crashing to the floor, hands curled around her middle. Her upper arm, where Capella had held her, also burned, and, when Capella left, and Darnold sat up to look, the cloth of her dress was melted to her arm. 

“Darnold?” 

At the sound of her name, her eyes flicked up to the corner, catching the barely glowing eyes of Benrey huddled there. The damage looked extensive, as Benrey’s clothing was mostly covered in blood, the original color lost at this point. His left eyes was swollen shut, though a second peeked out from under it, granting him the normal full range of sight. His lip was split, nose at an odd angle. They were favoring one arm, curling it close to their chest, and, when Darnold got a closer look as she moved towards them, there was bone peeking from the skin, around which had been sweet voice healed. One leg was tucked under daem, the other stretched out in front of daem, covered in various burns and cuts. It seemed a theme with them, the burning. 

“Hey.” Darnold kept her voice soft, settling next to daem carefully, wiping away a tear before it could fall properly, Benrey turning his head to look at her. 

“How... You shouldn’t be here.” He muttered, and Darnold smiled, reaching into her pocket. 

“Yes I should. I did this on purpose.” Out from her pocket came a vial. Inside was two liquids stacked on top of one another. The bottom was dark, sucking in the light around it, while the top was bright and shining. “I can get the others in here, and Tommy and G-Man aren’t gonna be powerless cause they were... invited. This was a trap and they fell right into it.” 

Benrey stared at the liquids quietly, eyes wide. "Is that...” Darnold nodded slightly, lifting the little vial a bit closer to Benrey’s face, so that he could see G-Man and Tommy’s blood begin to mix within. 

[pinnithin-writes]

Good Jokes

Chapter 6

Tommy was starting to get sick and tired of monsters.

The creature with blades for arms was effectively incinerated by the rocket thrusters in the launch room, taking Bubby out in the process. Tommy had grown to expect a quick reappearance from both of their elderly companions anytime they were wiped out. He wasn’t sure what kind of spatial fuckery had been added to their cocktail of enhancements, but it was definitely coming in handy. Especially once they escaped the clutches of one monster and promptly ran into another monster.

Oh god what the fuck what was that? What was that?

The whole team wasn’t sure what to do with the lumbering, twelve foot tall beast with lasers for hands. It reverberated the very chamber they stood in as it swept its incinerating beams in a wide, burning arc. The scientists scattered while Benrey slouched out of the way.

“I actually don’t know if you can help. That looks like hell,” Bubby commented once they had all found cover.

Tommy, pressed against the wall next to a frightened Dr. Coomer, eyed the thing in the next room. He cast a line out in his brain for something, anything familiar. Oh, well, there was that one thing.

“I’ve never seen something like that - they don’t - there’s no article about that on Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia!” he called.

Coomer parroted him instinctively. “The free online encyclopedia that anyone can edit?”

Across the walkway, Gordon barked out a laugh. The creature swung its attention to the three of them and they bolted.

Benrey actually managed to surprise Tommy by luring the monster into the arcing shock of a defunct generator, effectively frying it. With an ear-shattering screech, it disintegrated, leaving the group to stare at a solitary figure cruising leisurely out of the chamber. Benrey looked like he was on a stroll in the park.

Bubby pumped a fist in the air. “Gordon, we’ve defeated the creature!” he announced, an excited gleam in his eye.

“Thanks to Benrey’s song of death,” Tommy added. He caught the entity’s eye and lifted his chin in acknowledgement. So he could pull his weight and help out if he wanted. That wasn’t so bad, was it?

Benrey flipped him off and kept walking.

Tommy scoffed. He didn’t know why he bothered.

Dr. Coomer strode into the chamber to investigate a residue that was left behind. Gordon, panting and leaning heavily on the doorway after his most recent near-death experience, cast the scientist a concerned look.

“Don’t drink that!” he called. His voice was like a barbed wire fence, rusted and strained.

Before he could get himself any more worked up, Tommy took Gordon by the arm and pulled him aside to a quiet hallway. He needed to calm down. They both did. Tommy was relatively used to avoiding mortal injury, but getting bisected by an extraterrestrial laser wasn’t usually on his list. Tommy spoke to him slowly and evenly, watching the tension in Gordon’s neck gradually ebb as he caught his breath.

“When we get out of here,” he told him, mouth quirking with mischief, “I’m writing the Wikipedia article for the thing we just killed.”

Gordon’s laugh was more of a stumbling exhale. “What was it - what was it named?” He asked between breaths. He looked utterly drained, but he still chose to humor Tommy. “Y-You mean, you - I guess we’re the - the fuckin authorities on this. We’re discovering these things.”

Tommy leaned his shoulder against the sheet metal wall, facing Gordon as he thought. “I’ll call it…” What was the dumbest shit he could think of? “The Black Mesa Golem Ape. And I’ll write it down and put it on Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.”

The tired laugh Gordon let out felt like a gift just for him. Tommy found himself chuckling softly along. The dim glow of the industrial lighting reflected off of Gordon’s glasses as they held each other’s gaze. The lenses needed a good pass with a cleaning wipe, clouded as they were with blood and grease. Impulsively, Tommy reached up and removed them from his face with careful hands.

Gordon froze. Stopped laughing. Retroactively, Tommy tipped his head in a question. May I?

After a pause, Gordon nodded. Tommy could feel the weight of the other man’s gaze on him as he passed a hand over each lens, polishing them to perfect clarity with just a thought. It was quiet except for the latent hum of electricity from the lights.

“So I can’t wait to read that article,” Gordon said to fill the silence. “It’s gonna be great.”

Tommy’s smile pulled wider, but he didn’t say anything. He had hoped a gentle, private display of his power like this wouldn’t spook Gordon, and he was glad it was being received well. Tommy raised the frames to inspect them in the light, even though they were spotless.

He slid them delicately back onto Gordon’s face, his fingertips touching his cheekbones just barely as he withdrew.

“Um, yeah,” Gordon went on. “After this, I think I’m going to sleep for like, five days.” He raised a hand to push his glasses more securely up the bridge of his nose. His eyes were so dark and lovely. Like pools of rich ink. “Maybe get like a… Big Mac or something.”

Tommy could go for a Big Mac. He lifted his eyebrows expectantly, curious as to where Gordon was going with this line of dialogue.

Bubby chose that moment to stick his head around the corner. “What are you doing back here, Gordon?”

Tommy angled his chin to get a good look at the scientist, who wordlessly passed a glance between the two of them. He didn’t ask. Tommy didn’t answer.

“I’m relaxing after the-” Gordon flicked a look to Tommy. “What did you call it? The Black Mesa Golem Ape? After that incident.”

Tommy listened to Gordon explaining the concept of adrenaline to Bubby while Dr. Coomer caught up to them. This guy really was the only member of their party who was purely human, having to push himself harder than anyone just to stay alive. Tommy couldn’t help but feel a prickle of admiration for Gordon. If Tommy’s heart had been leaping out of his chest every minute for the past day and a half, he wasn’t sure he’d still be able to stand upright.

“When I come out of that,” Gordon finished, “I feel like I’m about to crumble to pieces.”

“Oh, dear, Gordon,” Dr. Coomer piped up. “That sounds serious. You may have come down with a case of The Crumbles. I read about it on Wikipedia, the free online encyclopedia that anyone can edit.”

Tommy had to clap a hand over his mouth to stifle his laughter.

Gordon, bewildered, glanced between Tommy and Coomer. “Why are you guys being like - why are you being so verbose about Wikipedia?”

Dr. Coomer offered no clarity, instead choosing to announce, “we’d better get a move on,” and disappear around the corner with Bubby.

Gordon’s questioning gaze hung on Tommy. He just grinned apologetically and shook his head. They followed the other scientists out of the hallway.

Rounding the corner, they found Bubby reclining in a metal folding chair that looked more uncomfortable than it would have been to simply stand there, with Coomer hovering next to him. The scientist’s eyes flashed with an almost feral glint when he saw Tommy and Gordon. Bubby had a pained look on his face, as if he’d been coerced into this.

“While you were out working,” Dr. Coomer informed them brightly, “we took a break on this luxurious chair. A chair is a piece of furniture with a raised surface supported by legs, commonly used to support a single person. Chairs are supported most often by four legs and have a back; however, a chair can have three legs or can have a different shape. Chairs are made-”

Tommy had never broken a bone in his life, but he felt that maybe one of his ribs would fracture from the sheer force of his laughter. He was delighted that his panicked, throwaway line about Wikipedia had evolved into such a tremendous gag. Sure, he’d read every line on that website, and sure, Black Mesa was maybe probably definitely funneling funds from the organization, but the tenacity with which Coomer jumped onto the joke was incredible.

Did he have that article about chairs programmed into him? Did all the clones come with secret Wikipedia articles? Were they all about chairs or did they each get their own unique knowledge?

Tommy giggled madly while he speculated. Gordon looked confused. Dr. Coomer looked pleased. Benrey looked like he was about to throw up.

---

They went deeper into the facility, following the vertebra of an extensive railway system. The army paratroopers had somehow found their way down there as well, and it felt like every corner they rounded hid a soldier on the other side. Tommy nudged the team in what he hoped was the right direction, drawing on his memory of the time he scanned the building layout in a manual he’d read a while back. It was questionable intel at best, but it was all they had.

Benrey was being refreshingly cooperative for a change. Okay, cooperative was a stretch, but he at least wasn’t actively hindering their progress. At times he was running with the team, mowing down infantrymen alongside them, other times he would disappear completely. It was during one such time that they encountered a sandbagged barricade, walling off a mounted turret. The barrel was pointed directly at a soldier in a maroon beret, who appeared to be in deep discussion with a man in a security uniform - wait.

“Is that Benrey?” Gordon asked, peering at the two figures on the other side of the tracks.

It wasn’t Benrey for long. The soldier put a bullet in his skull as soon as the group of scientists announced themselves.

Gordon, hopping the rails immediately, interrogated the man at gunpoint. It was admittedly not a good look for him, threatening the life of another in such a contentious way, teeth bared and trigger finger taut. The intimidation was forced and unnatural, and Tommy could see by the whites of his eyes that Gordon was nervous. He stepped neatly over Benrey’s latest corpse and backed Gordon up, anyway. He did ask nicely, after all.

The man identified himself as Forzen and, aside from being excessively agitated and jumpy (acceptable - he had four firearms pointed at him), appeared to be an ordinary human. Every word that came out of his mouth was either a clear lie or utter nonsense, and Tommy seesawed between respecting the guy for shooting Benrey point-blank and mistrusting him for associating with Benrey at all.

The soldier then chose that moment, apropos of nothing, to unload three consecutive clips into a nearby body.

Well, uh. Sure. Okay, dude.

Crossfire drew their attention long enough for the hostage to slip away. Gordon pelted after him, the rest of the team close behind. Tommy dragged his thoughts behind him on a string while he ran. What was this deranged man doing with Benrey? What made him decide to kill the entity? He suspected, somehow, that this particular paratrooper was not here simply on orders.

They found him hiding behind a crate minutes later, perched at the top of a precarious, ten story drop. Coomer and Bubby flanked Gordon and aimed their weapons. Tommy mirrored them passively, examining the soldier. Forzen, was it? He had that wide-jawed, high and tight, mass-produced soldier look, strong and anonymous. It made the fact that he was almost pouting all the more noticeable.

Bubby misfired his AR, startling everyone present.

Gordon recovered quickly. “We’ve got a couple of loose trigger fingers here,” he warned the soldier. “A lot of loose trigger fingers here.”

Tommy heard Bubby mutter “I think the trigger is loose,” under his breath and barely held in a snicker.

Forzen scowled. “Sounds like you guys don’t know what you’re doing.”

“I tried explaining to them about thirty times,” Gordon sighed. “This one’s a kid.” He tossed a gesture at Tommy.

Ouch. Was that payback for pointing his gun at him earlier today? Tommy pitched an inquiring look at Gordon, but he wasn’t paying attention.

Forzen passed Tommy a leer, eyeing him up and down. “You’re a kid?” he asked.

“I’m thirty six,” Tommy clarified testily. He didn’t feel weird about pointing a gun at him anymore.

“Oh,” Forzen uttered. “You have a - d’you - you have any - uh, you want a Beyblade?”

Tommy’s mouth opened wordlessly at the sheer audacity of this man. A Beyblade? Forzen was seriously trying to sell him on a child’s toy? He straightened, keeping his aim steady. He was beginning to suspect that him and Benrey’s proximity was no coincidence.

Actually, y’know what? Fine. He’ll bite.

“Yeah,” Tommy answered flatly. Gordon’s subsequent laugh was more of a startled choke.

“It’s - it’s downstairs,” the soldier went on. “Let me go get it.”

“No, no, do not listen to him,” Gordon said, the seriousness of his warning diluted somewhat by his giggling.

Dr. Coomer rolled a sardonic look between Tommy and Gordon. “I think we should let him get the Beyblade,” he suggested.

“Why do you need a Beyblade?” Gordon asked shrilly.

“Let it rip,” Forzen intoned. His sneer was mocking, now.

Tommy stared at him. He was actually starting to feel angry. Of all the fucking things he had to put up with on this nightmare hike through Black Mesa, infantilizing remarks from a gun-toting maniac was not what he had the energy for. He was about to commit an act of violence.

When Tommy pleaded, “Mr. Freeman, what should I do?” he was really asking, “Mr. Freeman, can I kill him?”

Gordon caught the dangerous edge in Tommy’s voice and threw him a warning look. “Don’t fall for it, man,” he said. “This is a fucking US military strategy. This is a US military strategy. Listen-”

“He’s infiltrating my mind!” Tommy’s words were dripping with so much sarcasm he suspected he could drown someone in it.

“The US military is getting crafty, Gordon.” Coomer remarked, his stare hard as he kept his gun aimed on the hostage.

“What d’you think, Bubby?” Gordon slanted his attention to the old scientist.

Bubby hadn’t said a word this entire exchange, aiming his weapon pensively. Gears were turning in his head, judging by the expression on his face, but he said nothing.

Gordon glanced back to Tommy. “Tommy,” he said seriously. “Stay strong.”

Fine. Since Gordon asked. He stayed strong as long as he could. Tommy didn’t have to worry about his own self restraint much longer, however, as Forzen went on impishly about the Beyblade. Gordon finally knelt so he was eye level with their hostage, pointing the barrel of his weapon straight at the soldier’s head.

“Listen,” he said. “Give me one piece of information that might get us out of here a little bit faster, and I won't blast you in the skull.”

Forzen, effectively cowed, spat out, “Benrey knows the exit.”

Tommy and Gordon exchanged a glance.

“Benrey knows the exit?” Gordon echoed, narrowing his eyes at Forzen. “You killed Benrey. That man’s - What do you know about Benrey? How do you even know his name? Why do you know who Benrey is?”

Tommy was staring at the paratrooper very intently now. This was orchestrated. Wherever Benrey was, whatever the entity was doing, this person was in on it. He stood very, very still at the realization.

“Because we’re best friends,” Forzen continued. Then he faltered, correcting himself. “We were best friends.”

Gordon peered up at Tommy again. Benrey had friends?

The loudspeaker, which had been pealing overhead like an omen for the past hour, chimed in. DOCTOR. FREEMAN. GET. OUTSIDE.

“I’m not gonna listen to the fucking intercom!” Gordon hollered at the ceiling hotly, springing to his feet. “I can’t trust anything!”

Tommy did not miss the way Gordon’s voice cracked when he said those last few words. He really thought he was an island in this haunting black sea. Tommy gazed heavily at him. He ached.

“Listen,” Gordon said to the hostage. “We’re going to point guns at you. You’re going to walk to the Beyblade.”

Forzen pulled himself languidly to his feet, eyeing the barrel aimed at his face. He passed a look between the scientists present, hovering with hesitance. Then he strolled to the edge of the vast pit and stepped right into it.

Gordon, stunned, stared after him as his form disappeared into the blackness. He cast a nonplussed look at his companions. “Don’t follow him,” he cautioned, his eyes snagging on Tommy in particular. “Do not f - Tommy.”

Tommy leapt down after the soldier, ignoring Gordon indignantly calling his name.

At the bottom, Forzen stood waiting, staring at him keenly. “Let’s go,” he said.

Yes. Let’s. Tommy flicked his fingers. The soldier disappeared from the plane.

---

When Tommy materialized at the top of the ten story shaft, he was surprised to see that Gordon looked legitimately worried.

“You’re back,” he sighed shakily.

Tommy held his gaze and inclined his head in a reticent nod. Of course he was. He’d always come back. As long as the world was crashing off its axis, Tommy would return to Gordon’s side. This was a matter of trust, and trust wasn’t something to be fucked around with.

Gordon cleared his throat. “Did you get the Beyblade?” he asked, attempting to be cheeky but failing.

“No,” Tommy answered evenly. “He ran off.”

Chapter 5 <-----> Chapter 7

[sephythespooky]

reader insert: back in black mesa

PART 2

Passport acquired, but what now?

words under cut

“Here,” Tommy gently pressed the document into your hand. “Show this to Benrey. I’ll handle e-everything else.” Seeing how pale your lips were, he frowned, then hugged you tight. “It’ll be o-okay, friend. W-we’re the science team! We can do any-anything!”

Reluctant, you stepped out of the hug when Tommy released you and held out your passport at Benrey, whose bright eyes hadn’t left you since you picked it up. “yo, man....that seriously you? you look, uh....look a bit shit in that photo, not gonna lie.”

You look at the photo and snort. It’s your school photo from years ago, the one you hated most. “Yeah, yeah I do.”

Agreement, that was something you knew Benrey didn’t get a lot of from Gordon. But he seemed to like it, grinning with his razors before gently shaking Dr. Coomer out of the repetition of what you now realize was the Wikipedia article for lockers. “old man, like, i get it, but we gotta, uh, gotta do stuff now.”

The white haired scientist shook his head, turning to you and lighting up, “HELLO PLAYER!” He called, then seemed confused. “I should know your name. Why don’t I? Hm...”

Tommy interjected as Benrey began circling you, tilting his helmet this way and that as he analyzed your form, “Dr. Coomer, w-we don’t know them yet. We’re supposed to be waiting for Mr. Freeman!”

“yo, feetman? where’d he go?” Benrey asked, suddenly more interested in what Tommy had to say than in you.

You watched as Dr. Coomer looked between them, then snapped his fingers, “Oh! that’s what I’ve been wanting to say! HELLO GORDON!” He grins, then slumps a bit, “Oh...but he’s not here. I still have to give him his interest playcoins.”

“Dr. Coomer?” you ask softly, almost afraid to speak up, “How did I end up here? Gordon finished the game. You guys should still be with him, but now you’re with me?”

The older gentleman chuckled, “Not to worry, Not-Gordon, we will figure this out. I do love a good puzzle! Let’s get Bubby and have a good ol’ chat about it.”

“least i don’t have to watch you. like i did him. you’ve got your passport,” Benrey still pushes you ahead of him and you squeak, rushing forward to hold onto Tommy’s sleeve.

Tommy moves so you can hold hands, and he swings his arm a bit, sunny smile in place, “We’ll be careful with you, I-I promise! Nobody will be doing any OSHA violations with me on the-the case!”

His presence was comforting, even if you were more than aware of his lack of gun-safety training. But there weren’t guns right now. At least besides the ones you could access.

The closer you get to the test chamber, the more tense you get, so you yelp when Benrey TELEPORTS in front of you and stands in the doorway, “dudes...these are the guys. i told you about them. not thinking about....about anything besides froot loops.”

The basic guards are unaffected, and the door opens behind Benrey with no other fanfare. Dr. Coomer laughs, “Well, I do love sugary cereal with colorful mascots. I prefer Frosted Flakes, though.”

“you would, old, old grampa man.” and then he’s gone, running ahead of you with that cackle that shook a nervous laugh out of you when it used to make you happy.

“Um...would...would petting Sunkist help you? He’s a good boy, and I-I always feel better when I pet him,” Tommy offers and you nod before he can even finish. Sunkist is immortal, and well trained. You’d pet the dang JPEG but you have a feeling things will be different for you in here.

“Okay. I’ll call for him once we find Bubby,” you’re getting close to his room, you think, but being so very near the test chamber is enough to make you jitter.

Your group enters the room with many scientists and you hear Bubby, “GOOD GRIEF! Not only are you late, but you brought an entourage. What kind of bastard are you?”

The yelling makes you flinch, and Dr. Coomer says helpfully as he takes hold of Bubby around the waist, pinning his arms, “Hello! We’re here to fetch you for a confab. We have to figure out how we help our new friend here and then get back to Gordon.”

“Gordon?” Bubby questions, his struggles against Coomer slowing until he’s finally released. “Wait. That’s right! Then why are you wandering around with that fucking idiot Benrey?!”

“bro, not cool.” Benrey hides behind you and blows a raspberry at Bubby. “came here tryin’ to be a great cool and you’re being mean. dr. mean man.”

“I live mean, and you tried to kill me! And everyone else!” Bubby huffs, waving his arms around and fire glinting off the tips of his fingers. “Someone explain this to me!”

Tommy takes a deep breath before he speaks, “Bubby, I know it was scary, but Benrey’s our friend. He only acted weird on Xen because it amplifies negative emotions. That’s why we felt so afraid and hopeless, otherwise it’d be pretty funny for Benrey to be so big, right? And, and fun to jump around like Moonshoes!”

“He has a point, Bubby.” Coomer takes a seat, and you follow suit, even if Benrey does leave and go sit on top of one of the other scientists who, for some reason, are not paying attention to your group. “I would have loved to see how my Power Legs did with the low gravity.”

“Well...I guess a little murder between friends isn’t that big a deal. And we didn’t die so we’re good for now. Maybe,” Bubby makes the hand sign for ‘i’m watching you’ toward Benrey, who is too busy tea bagging the scientist in mid-air to notice.

“Have,” Tommy looks at you hopefully, “Have you seen Mr. Freeman since my birthday party? Dr. Coomer tried to send him a message, but we’re not sure if he received it.”

“I have,” you say, closing your eyes to try and relax yourself, “Gordon Freeman is a streamer on Justin TV, like I am. I actually was...streaming myself doing this!”

“Good for him, he lived his dumb dream,” says Bubby.

“you’re streaming this, friend?” Benrey hops off the scientist and shuffles over, “you ever stream heavenly sword?”

“I haven’t yet,” you admit, “but I only heard of it through you talking about it to Gordon, so it took me a while to get hold of the game. I was planning on doing that next week.”

“nice,” the guard flops on the ground, just spread out all over. “m’gonna take a nap now. it’s boring without feetman here to bug. no offence, bro, but you’re too nice.”

“None taken,” you huff, very cautiously giving a pat to his helmet. You get a chuckle out of it.

“I hate to admit it,” Bubby isn’t looking at any of you, picking at the sole of his shoe, “but Gordon’s at least somewhat competent a leader.”

Tommy raised his hand, and Coomer gave him a nod to continue, “Mister....Mister Freeman might know what to do so we can get our friend out of here. But how do we tell him we-we need help? Oh,” he remembered something, then called out “SUNKIST!!!”

A woofing came, and you were suddenly bowled over by a large golden retriever.

“Good dog! Sunkist, you should let our friend up and sit with them. They’re, they’re very nervous.” Tommy giggled sweetly as Sunkist backed up and let you right yourself before laying his big head in your lap. You gently rub your hand down from his head to his shoulders, finally glad for your ability to touch things here. Even through your gloves, you felt how soft Sunkist’s fur was, how warm and strong the body beneath. Tommy had been more than right that Sunkist would make you feel better, and you murmur soft nonsense to the sweet pup.

“Can,” you’re nervous as you begin, “Can I ask why the other scientists don’t seem to notice us? They didn’t seem to really interact with Gordon, or you guys either.”

“I don’t know,” Bubby says as he waves a hand at the folks near the computer in the corner, “Somehow we’ve woken up and have some personality. These goons are dull as dishwater and twice as boring.”

“guuuuuuuuys,” Benrey whines loudly, “unless you know something about games or how to talk to freeman, i don’t caaaaare.” You pat his helmet again, getting a grumpy hurmph and a heavy hand falling on your knee.

“Why are you asking me? I don’t know! It’s not like I have his phone number!” Bubby snaps in response.

Dr. Coomer said with a perk of his head, “Our friend is a streamer, though. Does that mean you and Gordon work in the same department?”

“N-no,” you giggle a bit at the idea. “We all work in our own homes, or in office spaces we rent with others in small groups. Gordon has no idea I exist. He’s far too popular to bother with me.” But an idea comes as you speak and feel the steady, gentle weight of Sunkist on your lap, “But maybe my chat could go raid him? He might be streaming now and if they would go talk to him about this....maybe he’d listen?”

The team nods, and Tommy questions, “Didn’t you say you were streaming before you came here? M-maybe they’re still listening!”

“Might as well try,” you take a deep breath, “Guys in the chat, if you can hear me, go find Gordon Freeman on here. Message him, donate, do anything you can to get his attention on this stream! We need his help or....or I might never get out of here.”

You could only hope that your words got through...and that Gordon was in a mood to listen.

[blossomdriver]

Title: I keep hearing you're concerned about my happiness Author: Ambercreek Characters/Pairings:  Benrey/Gordon Freeman Warnings: Major Character Injury Fandom: Half-Life VR but the AI is Self-Aware Summary: Gordon can't sleep and Benrey helps him take care of his wounds

[AO3]

Gordon felt light-headed, uncertain if it was to the fact he'd lost a lot of blood over the day or his body started to come out of shock.

That was the least of his worries right now. For right now, he can't trust himself sleeping. Having an underlying concern of dying while sleeping.

Gordon found a corner to rest in a few feet away from the Science Team - who were all sleeping soundly. Watching as the room spun in such a way that made his stomach churn. Squeezing his eyes shut to keep the nauseous feeling down.

He keeps his eyes shut for a few minutes, taking in deep breathes - hoping it’s enough to keep from throwing up all over the ground. A few more minutes pass before Gordon feels confident in himself to open his eyes again.

So Slowly, Gordon re-opens his eyes and when the room is no longer spinning in circles. He lets out a heavy sigh.

On the other side of the room, Benrey sat unmoving on one of the plywood crates. Staring blankly at the wall in front of him.

Never once had Gordon catch Benrey sleeping. Thinking that perhaps he was one of those people who slept with their eyes open. It didn't feel too farfetched for the anomaly that Benrey was.

Gordon opens his mouth to say something but quickly snaps it shut when he sees Benrey turns to look at him.

“Why are you staring at me?”  Benrey asks in his usual dead-panned voice - brows furrowed. And Gordon blames his blood loss for the reason a shiver runs up his spine at the words.

“I'm not!" Gordon snaps back - quietly as to not wake up the others.

“You trying to start a fight, huh?" He says, making Gordon roll his eyes. "That's gonna be hard when you only got one hand.” Benrey taunts.

If Gordon wasn’t so tired and drained, then maybe he would fight back. But he’s come to learn that it was hopeless trying to say anything back to him. His words most of the time falling upon deaf ears.

“Whatever,” Gordon muttered under his breath, waving his stumped hand in the air. “Just go back to whatever you were doing.”

Benrey doesn’t say anything in response. Instead, he kept his eyes on Gordon and it was starting to bother him. The uneasy feeling like he needed to scratch himself to making the itching feeling of having the other looking at him stop.

“What do you want!” Gordon asked harshly.

“Huh?” He replies, breaking out of his train of thought.

“Why do you keep staring at me like that!” Gordon added.

“Like what?” Gordon groaned and placed his face in his one good hand. “This is hopeless.” He muttered bitterly into his palm.

“That looks like it hurts.” The words made Gordon lift his head. “What?”

“That looks like it hurts.” He motions with his head to Gordon’s missing hand. That prompts Gordon’s face to twist into a scowl. “Yeah, It hurts, no thanks to you dickhead.”

“Wow, rude.”

“You know, I could be nice and help stop the pain.”

“Oh yeah, and how?” Gordon was cautious of where this was heading.

“Only will do it if you show me your passport.” And never in this entire journey had Gordon wanted nothing more than to shoot Benrey in the fact than in this very minute.

“Fuck off,” Gordon says in defeat. Slumping his back against the wall, making a clicking noise with his tongue.

As Gordon had made himself comfortable against the cold concrete wall, red hot pain bloomed in his wrists. Bitting hard at the inside of his cheek to keep from screaming out - hard enough that he could taste copper in his mouth.

His knuckles turned white from the tight grip he had on his forearm. Cradling his arm against his chest as he curls into a ball.

It felt like his hand was still there, free to bend and rotate his wrists and fingers as nothing happened. But the pain that came with it was excruciating and Gordon wanted nothing more than it to be gone already.

The outside world beyond his labored breathing and the blood rushing in his ears was blocked out. Unable to take notice in the sudden creaking of wood with lack of weight or footfalls upon the ground.  

The only thing that managed to snap Gordon out of his personal moment of pain was the feeling of something touching his shoulder. His body instantly tensed up at the contact - seeing it as some sort of threat.

Blurry tear-filled eyes lift to see Benrey hovering over him. The tightness in his chest worsened as he braced himself for the worse.

However, what occurred instead isn't what he was anticipating.

Benrey knelt in front of Gordon, taking the wounded arm tenderly as he could in his hands. Pulling it out and away from Gordon’s chest.

Gordon was shocked - seeing how carefully Benrey was being. While also not lingering on the uptick of his heart-rate.

Benrey opened his mouth and teal orbs spilled from his mouth in a low waterfall hum - onto the opened wound.

Gordon watched in horror - feeling himself start to panic. Desiring to understand what the hell Benrey was attempting to do. Failing to push himself away from the other man. Sensing a feeling of entrapment between the wall and Benrey.

It stung as if someone dumped an entire bottle of hydrogen peroxide over the open wound. Gordon bitting back a scream the pressed against his teeth. Still trying not to wake up the rest with pain-filled cries.

Yet, just as swiftly as the pain came, it was gone.

Blinking a few times. Gordon's eyes trailed down to the amputated hand. Witnessing the teal color dissipate into the air. All while Benrey still held onto his forearm.

Neither of them knew what to say next. Just sorta sitting there in the silence once more as both of them stared at each other.

“You know, you’re an idiot for getting your hand cut off,” Benrey said in a poor attempt to deflate the tension in the room. It just furthered cemented Gordon’s hatred for the other man.

“Way to ruin the mood.” Gordon comment as he pulled his arm away from Benrey, letting it rest limply in his lap.

Barney leaned back on his heels, though not once taking his eyes off f Gordon - who still found it uncomfortable.

“Can you two lovebirds keep it down, some people are trying to sleep!” Bubby’s voice pipes up and it scares the shit out of both Gordon and Benrey. Causing Gordon to jump and whip his head to the side - in the direction of the sleeping scientists.

“Isn’t young love wonderful!” Dr. Coomer adds to the conversation. Even when he was still asleep.

Gordon groaned and buried his head into his hand once more. To shield his burning cheeks from any prying eyes.

"God damnit!"

[confusedunit]

Universe of Unreality - Chapter 5

Chapter 5 -  "Tommy what the hell are you talking about?" The Science Team is together. Tommy, Harold, and Bubby talk. Benrey learns something important. Dr. Freeman realizes something. Gordon wakes up.

Tommy sighed quietly, wringing his hands before returning to sifting through the contents of another Coomer clone's locker. When the other two had shown up with such a battered Dr. Freeman, Dr. Coomer had taken him to get settled comfortably by the medical station, while Bubby and Tommy had started looting lockers for any spare medical supplies. And the amount they'd found had been staggeringly low. Dr. Coomer's own locker had contained a few batteries, while Bubby's had held two medical packs, the other lockers being frustratingly empty of anything useful. And this locker was no different. For a moment, he wanted to slam the door shut, vent some of his frustration. But he didn't want to wake the resting physicist. Sleep was important for humans to heal well, and Dr. Freeman needed all the help he could get.

He closed the door quietly instead, running a hand through his hair to try to calm down. His other hand twitched with pent up energy, as he turned to look around the room. He flinched, startled to realize that Bubby had been right behind him. "Oh! Bubby-"

Bubby held up a hand to stop him, before he shook his head. "Sit down already. You're on edge, and none of those fucking things have anything in them that matters."

"I suppose they didn't trust the clones with anything." Dr. Coomer sat cross-legged on one of the benches in the middle of the room, rubbing at his right arm. "Maybe they thought I would snap and use them to kill someone."

"To be fair, Harold," Bubby walked over, sitting next to him. "You did try do that."

He relaxed quickly, once Bubby was at his side. "I did try to do that."

Tommy sat on the floor in front of the two of them, rubbing at his temples. While he understood what had happened before now, the new situation...confused him. It didn't fit into his previous data. "It just...It doesn't entirely...make sense." He mumbled to himself.

"How so?" Dr. Coomer held out his hand to Tommy. He was always such a comforting presence, even if he was struggling on his own. Always a protector, Tommy knew that well. It was why Black Mesa had never truly trusted the older man, an urge to protect and help wasn't always a positive when tests needed to be done.

"Yeah, nothing fucking makes sense, Tommy." Bubby huffed, glancing across the room towards where Dr. Freeman was resting. Bubby was protective too, in his own way, but he was more self preserving and angry. Defensive, more than outright protection. Burn first, ask questions never, get the fuck out of danger always. No time for self sacrifice in his mind, either he gets out, with you in tow or not, or dies trying. He wasn't angry with the Science Team, or Tommy. He was scared. Tommy could understand that, even if the other didn't want to admit it.

"Bubby." The older scientist sighed. "Let him speak." He turned back to Tommy. "What's gotten stuck in your mind?"

He sighed too, wringing his hands together as he thought. "...I know more than you think."

"We know you're very smart, Tommy. I hope we haven't given you the impression that-"

"N-no, Dr. Coomer, you haven't. That's...that's not what I meant." How did one go about this? They wouldn't be able to handle most of what he knew, not when they were in such a fragile state. His father had told him to be careful sharing information before their exit was ready, but...he couldn't really hide this any longer, not if they actually remembered for once.

It was always easier to hide something if no one remembered the truth.

Bubby adjusted his glasses, looking at the scientist on the floor. "...Tommy, are you okay?"

"I am. I don't...know if you will be." His shoulders slumped, and he rubbed at his forehead this time. "It's...difficult to- to process. If you're...not ready."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Ah, there's the fear-anger again. It's not personal, but it's expected, and it actually makes him feel a bit better.

Dr. Coomer lowers his voice. "...Is this about the AI thing?"

That threw him for a loop. "What?" He'd heard Dr. Coomer mumbling things about a game, and if life was real, but he...never thought the man had believed it. Shit, that was going to make things much harder to explain to him.

"The AI thing. That we're not real."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" A bit of concern leaked into Bubby's words. He must have been severely worried, to let his walls down enough to verbalize. "It's just a fucked up Tuesday at work."

"But none of this is real, Bubby."

"No, that's bullshit. I bleed. You bleed! We fight, and we remember, and we lived. All this shit is real."

Dr. Coomer pressed at his head with his hands, closing his eyes. "No, Bubby-" He shook for a moment, before he was quiet.

Tommy gestured to Bubby, before moving his hands slowly in sign. They had all learned years ago, after the Science Team had collected together, for days when Dr. Freeman just could not handle speaking, and it had proved useful whenever they needed to speak without speaking. Tommy was a fan of using it, especially. Easier to be clear with his words when his vocal pattern didn't get in the way. Thanks, Mr. Coolatta, for that. Very cool.

He kept an eye on Dr. Coomer as he signed the words. 'Let this one go. He's not ready to know the truth.'

Bubby grit his teeth, angrily signing back. 'He needs to fucking know!'

He took a slow breath, signing again. 'We can tell him when he can handle it. Right now, it will break him. Again.'

The other scientist looked over to Dr. Coomer, hands clenching as he realized Tommy was right. He shook out his hands, before resting an arm around Dr. Coomer's shoulders. "Harold, it's okay."

"It's not..." He sighed, resting his head against Bubby's shoulder.

"...I can't...explain everything. B-but, uh- …If you ask me a question, I can...try to answer it?"

"Okay, here's a fucking question then. What the hell is going on?"

He could feel a headache building. "I can't answer that question-"

"God damn it-"

"Because I don't...know what's going on."

"...May I ask a question?"

Tommy nodded, looking back up. "Of c-course, Dr. Coomer."

"...Things are happening again?"

Oh thank God, an easy question. "Yes. Not the same- same way, but yeah."

"And things have happened multiple times before?"

Well shit, that one was harder. "...Sort of. Not- not always the...same test, though."

"So, what," Bubby spoke again. "this is some kind of Black Mesa experiment?"

Hell yes. "Exactly." He nodded quickly. "It's multiple, all at once."

"And how long have they been doing this? Without us noticing?"

"You noticed, once." The words fell from his mouth before he realized it, and he shut his mouth so quickly his teeth clacked.

Bubby stared. "...What did you just say?"

"...I've- known the- the whole time. …Not t-the whole time. It's... You- you noticed once. Dr. Coomer...h-he noticed once."

"Do you mean the most recent time, Tommy? With Gordon?"

"No, Dr. Coomer."

"So we-"

"And years." He wrung his hands again. "...It's...it's been years."

Bubby's look turned icy. "...How many years."

"Bubby, I didn't-"

"I know the fuck you didn't, but what fucking year is it."

"It's-"

"2020." Dr. Coomer's tone dropped, before it bounced back up. "But that can't be true, because it's 2004."

"No, it can't be either of those, because it's fucking 2003."

"No, my dear Bubby, I'm afraid I remember it being 2004."

Tommy groaned, pressing his hands against his eyes. He could feel the glow, and he just needed to calm it down. Yellow like the sun, means guidance and protection. His eyes were always yellow, but the glow needed to go. "You're- you're going to g-get a different answer, who- whoever you ask!"

The other two quieted, looking down at him.

"...The last time I- I saw a calendar, it...was 2005.

"what's a calendar?"

All three of the scientists startled with noise, turning quickly to look over at Benrey. The man was once again wearing his helmet, and didn't look even the slightest worse for wear.

"Where the fuck have you been??" Bubby leapt to his feet, stomping over to the shorter guard. "You just abandoned Dr. Freeman in the test chamber, with your helmet? He was half dead by the time we got him up here!"

"bro how the fuck was i gonna help him if i'm a skeleton. he would have flipped." He crossed his arms, staring up at him. "and yeah i left my helmet with him. so what was it doing on the floor over there?" He gestured towards the place they'd last seen Dr. Freeman.

"...Benry, what do you mean the helmet was on the floor?" Dr. Coomer started to rub at his arm again.

"i mean it was just there, next to the blood. no gordo, no freeman." He shrugged. "you let him wander, or something?"

The three looked at each other, before they scrambled for the door.

"Split up and find him!" Dr. Coomer took charge. "That means you too, Benry!"

"i can't believe you lost him. tommy i gave you one job." He slowly followed after the others.

-

God, it was always heart to hearts, wasn't it? Always caused problems.

Benrey wandered through the halls, every once and a while letting out a few bubbles of calming Sweet Voice, to see if Dr. Freeman would call out or something. But no voice came. Well, the VOX kept calling out, asking for scientists to respond or whatever, but no actual people.

And no people were left behind, every guard he passed down on the floor as he went. He didn't trust any of them. He never had, and he definitely didn't now. Any guard that wasn't him was a threat, and any scientist that wasn't the Science Team was on thin ice.

Except Darnold. Darnold was cool. He played games with Benrey sometimes, and even if he was super protective of his data he was still good enough to seed his torrents. Benrey liked Darnold, he could stay.

…What was he doing? Right, finding Freeman. And right there, as he turned the corner of the hall, he found him, but whatever comment he was about to make about the guy running off was cut off by the realization of what was going on.

Dr. Freeman was slumped against the security desk, one hand holding a phone against his ear, the other pressing at his head. "It's- hello? Can anyone hear me this time?" His voice sounded frantic. "My name's Gordon. G. Freeman, I'm- I'm Sector C. Please-"

A headcrab wandered along the floor nearby. He didn't want to hurt it, they were actually pretty cute when they weren't bloody and couldn't hurt you. But he watched it notice Freeman, and watched it crouch and wiggle. The second it was in the air, he popped it once, sending it flying across the room.

Dr. Freeman screamed, dropping the phone and spinning around, covering his head. "I'm not a threat! I work here!"

Benrey looked down at the shattered plastic of the phone and put his gun away, moving over to his side. "bro, it's just me."

He let his arms drop, watching the guard. "...Oh my God, you're alive..."

"yeah, sorry. had to take a little siest- AH-" He tensed up, before he realized he was being hugged. "...you okay, man?"

"I thought you died, Benry..."

Right, that was the first time he'd seen him die. He wasn't Gordon, he was Freeman. Fuck, he'd forgotten. "sorry." He slowly attempted to mimic the hug, unused to the movement. He started hugs, he didn't get hugged. "old benny's all good, man. just needed a bit to feel better."

"...Right..." He took a quick breath, before pulling back. "...Not human, right?" He tried to smile, but the look fell flat.

"can't die in a way that matters." He grinned, sharp teeth glinting in the busted lights.

Dr. Freeman shuddered, turning back to the desk. "Oh fuck- the phone-"

Uh oh, was he gonna freak out because he couldn't contact anyone? The VOX echoed above them, once again asking for a reply. He put a hand on the younger man's shoulder. "uh, coomer said comms are down. no mics." He'd said something like that the previous go around, right? Probably. If not, Dr. Coomer would back him up anyway, he was sure.

"Fuck...then what do we do, Benry?" He turned around again, leaning back against the desk. "...We're trapped in here. And...can I be honest for a minute? While the others are away?"

"go for it."

He shifted a bit, before reaching up to press the lambda on his chest.

"User health, 73%." The HEV suit reported.

"I was just at 75 when I took a nap."

The suit continued. "Warning! Internal damage, detected!"

Benrey tensed up. "...didn't heal you good?"

"I think I'm wounded in a way the HEV can't fix, Benry." He looked off to the side. "...I need medical attention, and...I don't know how to get out of here. I don't know what's going on. I'm having memories I can't possibly have, while also looking at all of this bloodshed and compartmentalizing it because I'm in survival mode." He gestures to a guard, slumped down, across the room. "I just talked to Freddie this morning, and we made jokes about luck. And now, I'm here, and he's not." He moved his hands to his head, digging them in. "I feel like I'm hallucinating. None of this is happening, right? Gotta...gotta be a bad dream after the Resonation, right?" He let out a bit of panicked laughter. "Am I dead?"

Benrey had no idea what to do, and felt an immense amount of gratitude as he heard the Science Team run into the room, saw them move to Freeman's side and start to talk. He didn't hear any of it, mind focused elsewhere. He knew of only once place that could help Dr. Freeman heal, entirely. But he didn't know how to get him there. He'd...have to give that more thought.

It was the only thing he could do.

-

Gordon hadn't slept well, he could tell from how long it took him to wake. As he slowly started to stretch and become coherent, something collided with his face, and his blood ran cold. Fuck, under attack, where were the Science Team, where was the threat- he quickly raised his right arm, using the left to pull the object from his face, and...stopped, as he felt that the object was squishy.

Oh, it was a pillow.

He looked over to his right arm next, seeing that he'd remembered to take off his prosthetic that morning before he'd gone to sleep. No gun, no can of soda being tossed, no life or death situation. Just being woken by having a pillow thrown at him.

…Oh shit, that meant he was running late, didn't it.

He sat up, making himself continue with his stretch and an overly dramatic yawn. "Who could be throwing objects at me?" He asked, making a show out of looking all around the room. "I don't see anyone..."

Another pillow flew up from the side of the bed, catching him in the arm this time. "Boo!"

"Ahh!" He threw himself to the side, still dramatic. "Oh no, I have been slain...who will make breakfast now..."

"No!" A young boy scrambled up the bed. "I can't make pancakes..."

He sat up again, pulling him into a hug. "Sorry I'm taking a while, Joshie. Couldn't sleep."

Joshua looked up at him, with a worried look. "I woke you from a bad dream?"

"N...well, kinda. But that's a good thing, bud." He let him go from the hug, with a smile. "Why don't you get the living room ready for breakfast with cartoons, and I'll be out soon to make pancakes. Sound good?"

The kid grinned, pumping his fists into the air. "Gordie's the best at pancakes, even dad said so! He said one day you're gonna teach me pancakes."

"I will, bud, but when you're a little older. Hot pans are dangerous. Now go on, the sooner I get up, the sooner you can have pancakes."

Joshua left the room as quickly as his legs could carry him, with a call of 'thank you!' and a wave over his shoulder as he shut the door.

Gordon flopped back on the bed with a sigh. Maybe...could they wait a day? While he just spent time with Joshua, and settled back into what was real and normal? And then he'd get back into it. Just one day should be fine, right...?

The sudden ringing of his cell phone startled him, and he reached for it with his right arm before he realized his mistake, flailing to grab it with his left hand and hold it to his ear. "Uhh, hello?"

"Gordon! I'm surprised you're awake this hour."

He relaxed immediately. "Hey, dad. What's up?"

"Can't I call to talk to my son?" The older man teased, a hearable smile on his face.

"You can, but not usually at..." He looked over to the clock, doing a bit of quick math. "...7 at night."

"Well, I had hoped that if I called you at 11 in the morning, you would have a higher chance of being awake." He was floundering for a reason, he could tell. His dad was never a good liar.

"What's going on, pops." He sat up again, sliding off the bed to his feet.

"...Well, Josh's mother called me..."

He groaned, closing his eyes in frustration for a moment. God, he hated her. "Oh yeah?"

"And said that you blocked her number."

"For a reason." He stressed the words, moving across the room to his closet. He put his phone between his ear and his shoulder, to sort through what he wanted to wear. "And that reason is because I am unable to hold a civil conversation with her."

"I know, son. I'm sorry you're in this position." He really did sound apologetic, and he knew that was the truth. With his dad out of the country, he ended up sort of being the fill in dad for Joshua. Including having to talk to his mom. He hated it.

"So what does she want, then?"

"She's saying that since she hasn't gotten to visit with Joshua, she wants a full week with him. And wants to arrange that with you."

"A week??" He can't keep his volume, and almost drops his phone. "That's such bullshit!"

"Please, Gordon...I need you to talk with her. Do what you want when you talk, but she won't stop calling me."

"..." He sighed. "And let me guess, she doesn't care about the time zone difference."

"Got it in one..."

"Okay, dad. I'll call her after breakfast. And I'll unblock her number. Hopefully that will keep her from yelling at you."

"Thank you, Gordon." He smiled again, Gordon could tell. "So...have any plans this weekend?"

"Gonna...hang out with some friends. We're going to try to meet up, or something. Not sure yet." It wasn't technically a lie, the Science Team were his friends. …He felt so, at least.

"Well, I wish you good luck! I...really need to get to sleep."

Gordon smiled a bit. "Thanks, I think I'll need it. …Sleep well, dad."

"Have a good day, Gordon. I love you. And Joshua too."

"We love you too." He hung up the phone, lightly tossing it over to the bed, before he groaned.

This was gonna be a hell week, he could already tell.

[goatbi]

The Riverbank Chapter Twelve

As the world returned to color, the two felt their bodies unfreeze, as the world resumed around them. Despite being frozen, they had been aware the entire time, watched as Darnold was dragged through the portal into the other world. Bubby kept xyr eyes on the alley for a moment, but no one seemed to notice anything. Harold sighed softly, then stood, Bubby following moments later. 

They went across and got her book before going home. 

Harold pushed open the door, eyes darting to the couch, where Gordon lay on Tommy’s chest, the two of them sleeping quietly. G-Man sat carefully on the other side of the couch, cutting Tommy’s glow down to a more tolerable level, as it was obvious his emotions were causing him to lose control of, at the very least, that. 

The small burn on the floor showed it wasn’t the only thing that Tommy was losing control of, though, Bubby couldn’t fault him for that. He wasn’t the only one in the house with powers that fluctuated with emotions. 

G-Man looked up as they entered. There was a pause, as Bubby shut the door behind him with a sharp click, and G-Man nodded. “She’s been taken?” 

“Didn’t take long. Wasn’t the same person that Tommy saw, I don’t think.” Harold said, setting Darnold’s book carefully on the coffee table, and sat down next to G-Man. Bubby hovered, full of too much nervous energy to sit. “Also not Arcturus from Gordon’s first memory.” 

Gordon had gotten a few more memories of that week, all short usually panic inducing. He had also stopped telling them what happened at all, no ideas of what was wrong, though they could guess as his hands found injuries, as if checking them to confirm what he had seen was real. 

“I do not... believe that he would leave. His own dimension. It’s obvious... that he’s the one in control.” G-Man wrapped an arm around Harold, eyes tracking Bubby as he paced in front of the TV, chewing on his thumbnail. 

“Will you know?” Bubby asked, despite having asked that same question multiple times. G-Man nodded patiently, and Bubby nodded along, still pacing back and forth. “Still don’t like it.” 

“I know.” 

They fell silent. The only noise was Gordon’s stuffy breathing from the side, as the two of them slept on. Eventually, Bubby sat on G-Man’s other side, leaning his head onto G-Man’s shoulder, closing his eyes, arms wrapped around himself, and thus, began to wait. 

--------------------------------------------------------

“Take it for a second.” Darnold said softly, and Benrey lifted a hand, carefully taking it and pressing against his chest, as Darnold rolled up one of the sleeves of her dress, revealing writing across her forearm in what seemed to be silver sharpie. Benrey raised an eyebrow, and Darnold laughed softly. “Tommy.” 

“Of course.” He murmured, and Darnold took the vial once more, shaking it carefully. Benrey raised an eyebrow as she did, and she held out her arm for them to read. Benrey’s eyes gazed over the silver writing in Tommy’s familiar handwriting, including the little heart periods that he used. Benrey found himself smiling, and Darnold snickered, uncorking the vial carefully. 

“He thought you’d be happy to see that.” Darnold said softly, dipping a finger into the mixed blood, which glowed and went dark intermittently, almost memorizing as it did. “When I’m done, can I move you over to hide it? It’s not exactly hard to see with it glowing like this.” Benrey nodded, watching as Darnold dragged the bloodied finger alone the wall, eyes darting down to her arm every once in awhile to follow the guideline of what to do. 

Benrey watched quietly, as Darnold slowly got through the sigil, recorking the bottle and wiping the excess blood off her finger onto the floor near Benrey. Then, carefully as not to disturb what, with closer inspection, looked like a dislocated knee, not to mention the other injuries Darnold probably couldn’t see, they shifted over, Benrey covering the slightly glowing mark. 

“It’ll take a minute to work, I think, but, until then. I’m here.” Darnold held onto Benrey’s hand, smiling, and Benrey smiled sadly back, pulling her closer long enough to press a careful kiss to her forehead. 

“No... you’re not.” And Darnold felt her head light on fire. 

[froggycatvest]

Title: There’s a cafeteria? Words: 1200 Ships: None Warnings: None Characters: Benrey, Gordon, Tommy, Dr. Coomer, Bubby Part 5 of 5 Part 1 HERE

----

...when Benry went to follow, Gordon stepped in front of him with a firm, “Not you.”

He had held up his hand to stop him, but Benry walked into it instead. He wanted to see things get burned. Gordon was strong, though, and the hand against his chest stopped him.

“That was a lot of keys you had.” He sounded suspicious. “What are they for?”

“Doors.”

“What kind of doors.”

“Locked doors.”

Gordon suddenly made an angry noise, gripping hard at Benry’s vest. 

“I’m going to--!” He stopped and took in a deep breath, eyes smashing shut. When he opened them, there was tenseness to his jaw. “Look. All I’m saying is those had better not be keys to unlock the sheer multitude of locked doors we encountered the entire way here, because if I have to hear that we could have escaped way earlier than this, I’m going to just--” 

“You’re gonna what?” Benry goaded him, tilting his head to stare at him, eyes half-lidded. “You wanna fight?”

Gordon exhaled, showing teeth. “Yeah? You wanna go? Is that it?”

There was something in his eyes that made Benry feel that he would. That he’d fight. If pushed further, maybe. Benry didn’t want that.

“You shouldn’t if you’re hungry.”

Gordon blinked at that, then looked over his shoulder at Dr. Coomer stirring the pot, Tommy sitting on the counter, and Bubby standing on it to scrounge through the cabinets. Tommy waved at them.

“It’s almost done,” he called. “Stop arguing.”

All the tension drained from Gordon instantly as he whined out, “He started it. And you knew he had those keys the whole time, Tommy.”

“He’s our security guard, Mr. Freeman,” Tommy said patiently. “He Guards and Secures important things.”

“I mean, yeah, but.” Gordon gravitated towards Tommy, only able to focus on one person at a time as he left Benry behind. “You really trust him?”

“Of course.”

“Just like that, huh?” Gordon replied in wonderment. “You gotta tell me what you see in him.”

Tommy tilted his head a bit. “But you’re nice to him.”

Gordon’s face cringed like he was in pain. “Don’t remind me,” he complained. He took a breath. “Aren’t you mad at what he did? He left you to fend for yourself. He put you in danger.”

Tommy’s eyes lowered. “Yeah…” He perked up. “But he helped turn off the alarm. And he found the cafeteria. We get to eat now.”

Dr. Coomer clicked off the stove. “Baby steps, Gordon,” he said gently. “We all have to do that for you, I believe.” A pause. “If you want, that is.”

Gordon’s face scrunched up again, for a different reason this time. “...Guys.”

Bubby stopped what he was doing to frown at him. “Are you all having a moment down there?”

Gordon gave a laugh like he was just realizing how ridiculous the whole situation was. “Sure,” he said, holding out his arms like he wanted a group hug. “Want to join us?”

Bubby looked around at all of them. Dr. Coomer held up his arms with an encouraging, “I’ll catch you.”

“I can get down myself,” Bubby insisted, while Tommy got excited.

“But it’s more fun to Jump,” he said, straightening up, and Benry shouted.

“Do a stage dive!”

Gordon gave Benry a look, before shrugging. “You know what?” He turned back to grin at Bubby. “Sure. We’ll catch you.”

Dr. Coomer kept it up, smiling. “Only a few people have died performing a stage dive. The odds are in your favor.”

Bubby crouched down. “I don’t think so. I’m not taking the chance before I can get something to eat.”

He brought down some bowls and handed them to Dr. Coomer, while Tommy let out a disappointed aw.

Benry joined them, mimicking how Gordon and Dr. Coomer had their hands up. “Tommy jump.”

Tommy immediately stood up on the counter, towering over everyone. “Are you sure?”

“Tommy,” Gordon said with concern, offering him his hand. “I know you trust him, but I really don’t think he’s strong enough to hold you up.”

“No fun allowed,” Benry complained, eyes boring straight into Gordon’s, while Dr. Coomer nodded.

“A fussbudget, one would say.”

“Someone has to be!” Gordon pointed out as Tommy took his hand and hopped to the floor. “I’m trying to be a responsible leader here.”

No one said anything.

“I’m doing good, right?” Everyone stared, unmoving, and Gordon gave an exasperated look. “Guys.”

“The food is ready,” Dr. Coomer said brightly, ladling soup into bowls.

Gordon spoke to himself as he went back to his box of cereal. “Well, I think I’m doing pretty good.”

Benry approached him at the counter where he was pouring the cereal into the two bowls from earlier. “You’ve got, uh…” He pointed at the bowls. “You’re eating for two, huh?”

Gordon looked him dead in the eye. “One. Is. For. You.”

“Oh I don’t eat.”

“You don’t eat.” Gordon sounded like he just accepted it as fact. “You don’t eat. You don’t sleep. You don’t die. What else can you do?”

Benry ignored him to tear open a new milk carton.

“Oh?” Gordon had such a smarmy smug expression as he held up his bowl to him. “Being nice? Is that a thing you can do?”

He was just going to pour milk. To calm him down. Milk calms down people. Warm from the microwave or something. Why was he being so rude?

“Dude, dude!” 

Benry’s eyes focused back to the moment. The first thing he noticed was Gordon’s incredulous expression. Next, the bowl overflowing with milk in the other’s outstretched hand. His own bored tone reached his ears. 

“Oh bro. You spilled.”

Gordon snapped at him. “You were the one pouring!”

“Gordon,” Dr. Coomer chided. “Don’t waste. The rest of us want some, too.”

And Benry chimed in. “You have to pay for that.”

As expected, Gordon shot him a look, mouth working around many things he probably wanted to say at once. “I--why do I have to pay for it when you spilled it?” His mood changed immediately as another thought hit him. “Wait, do we even have to pay? Aren’t the meals here free? Aren’t we government funded?”

“That's the government for you,” Dr. Coomer replied cheerfully. “Nothing is free. Same as your hev suit. It's not yours, after all.”

“Right.” Gordon pointed at Benry. “See, if you got milk on this and damaged it, you'd have to pay for it.”

“Too bad.”

“Too bad? This suit is expensive. Probably more than what you’re paid in, like...an entire year.”

Benry kept quiet, looking around the room. It was probably true. It was probably true of every piece of equipment in Black Mesa. He didn’t need to be reminded that he wasn’t paid well. 

Benry found himself turning his back to him, his words coming out quick with a click of his tongue. “Yeah so?”

There was a pause between them, and when Gordon spoke he sounded genuinely apologetic. “Did I hurt your feelings? Oh, jeez. Benrey, I didn’t mean it. Look, I bet it cost more than my paycheck, too. I don't even know what I get paid.” 

He approached, patting Benry on the shoulder, being all friendly like he always did, always doing that encouraging talk of his. “Hey, fight the system. Demand better pay. Especially now, you know, considering all this...aliens and shit. Don’t you get hazard pay?” 

Benry glanced at the hand on his shoulder, but let him keep it there. “I think you’ve been the hazard.”

Gordon shrugged. “Yeah, I guess so. Danger just follows me, huh?”

He patted him again, before sitting down with the others at the table. He waved him over.

“Come on. Sit down and eat.”

[confusedunit]

Universe of Unreality - Chapter 2

Chapter 2 -  "Benry, you gotta stop telling people I'm dead, man."

Dr. Freeman paused for a moment in the 'airlock', catching his breath as he waited for the door to open. He was so late. Why did they always do this? Change tests around at will, change times and alert him via pager at 6am. Couldn't they just pick a time and stick to it? It had originally been a 10am test, and it looked like now it was gonna be that anyway.

God, he needed to have words with his boss. He designed his test, let him get to pick the times he runs it. He's always two weeks in advance with his test prep anyway! There's time to prepare for the energy usage at those times! There's even less time to prepare if they shift times around three hours before.

He sighed as the door finally opened, adjusting his glasses as he hurried over to the front desk. He reached up to pull his hair into a small ponytail, missing the length his hair used to have. Stupid dress code, with it's 'professional hairstyles' requirement. He kept it long enough for the smallest ponytail out of spite.

"Hey, Mr. Freeman. Looks like you're running late." The guard looked up at him with a grin. "Again."

"Wouldn't happen so much if they kept their times straight. You'd think they would have learned by now." He smiled a bit, letting his arms fall from his hair. "Didn't I tell you to call me Gordon, Fredrick?"

"Didn't I tell you to call me Freddie, Gordon?" Freddie smirked, giving him a shrug. "Anyway, I had some messages left for you I think. Guess they didn't think to email you. But there's been system issues all day, so I don't know where they are now. I'll forward them to you if we find them?"

"What, none of them thought to use a pen and paper?" He snickers. "Sounds good, Freddie. I'll check later."

"Good luck with the test." He waves him off. "With how things have been today, you might need it."

"Keep your luck, man. I've got enough of my own. Promise." He grins, before quickly jogging down the hall.

-

Tommy didn't know what he had been expecting, when he had turned the corner away from the break-room. But hearing someone call out down the hall 'Good morning, Dr. Freeman.' hadn't been one of the things. Hearing a reply of 'Hey, sorry, running late.' was even less expected.

He knew that voice. Oh God, he knew that voice. He'd almost forgotten it, but he knew it so clearly. He spun around quickly, sprinting back down the hall, and barely skidded to a stop in front of the man walking in.

Dr. Freeman looked up at him, startled, before he grinned. "Hey, Dr. Coolatta!"

He barely held back tears, as he lunged forward to pull the shorter man into a tight hug. He hadn't...he hadn't known Dr. Freeman was even still alive, what with...everything Black Mesa had been doing. He'd thought the man was gone. He hadn't even looked...God, he hadn't even looked...

Dr. Freeman returned the hug, though he seemed a bit confused. "...Uh, Tommy? You okay, bud?"

He wondered how much the MIT grad knew. How much he remembered. God, how long had he been awake, and...no, he couldn't...he couldn't blame himself. If he couldn't find Dr. Freeman, and Benrey couldn't find Dr. Freeman, then they had to have hidden the man somewhere hard to find. Somewhere none of them would have looked. Or been able to look? He didn't know.

"...Tommy, you're holding me a bit tight there-"

He flinched, pulling back from the hug. "I'm- I'm sorry, Dr. Freeman!"

The younger man held up his hands, smiling a bit nervously. "It's fine, you didn't hurt me or anything. I'm just- ...You okay? You're acting like you've seen a ghost."

Oh, if only he knew how true that statement felt. "I'm fine. Didn't...didn't sleep well, is all. And I missed you!"

"I know I was gone for a few weeks, but it was just a flu. I'm feeling better now." He gave a smile, as if to convince the other that he was fine. He didn't...look entirely fine, though. He looked drained, tired. Still recovering, he'd probably insist.

"Right..." Tommy took that information and sorted through it. He still thought...if he thought this was his return from when he was sick...that complicated matters a lot. But it also explained several things, to him. "Sorry, Dr. Freeman. I was just...really worried..."

"I'm okay, promise. Still..." Dr. Freeman shifted from foot to foot. Okay, so he knew he was lying a bit. "...Okay, so I'm still feeling a bit lethargic, but other than that I'm okay. Got cleared to come back, too! Paperwork's in order, I'm not contagious." He startled, as if just remembering something. Difficulty remembering things as well...? "Which, right- sorry to cut this convo short, Tommy, but I'm, uh- I'm like...half an hour late for my test. Gotta run!" He waved, as he started jogging away again.

Late? For a test? Oh, that meant that today really was- Oh no. No, he wasn't going to let Dr. Freeman go through that. "Wait!"

"Sorry, I'll talk with you at lunch!" Without another chance, he went around the corner, and he was gone.

-

It was a strange sensation, to be within the locker rooms while feeling only one set of eyes. Dr. Coomer hadn't experienced that in...a very long time. He couldn't correctly remember the amount of time, but he knew it had to be long. The clones had been around for years, after all. ...Even if, chronologically, that didn't make much sense.

He'd sat down on the floor, staring at his locker, and gotten lost in thought. His, not a clone's. They each had their own, but this one...this one was his. He knew this. This was one distinct fact that he had exact evidence for. It was other things that were much more complicated. Such as the paradox of years. According to all the information he had, these had to be false memories. Gordon had admitted this had been a game, correct? Which meant...his memories had to be false. Lies. Fabricated backstory for an AI to parrot to a player that he was programmed to be compelled to follow.

And that had been easy to take to, and understand, during the Science Team's time with Gordon. But now...now that data itself seemed flawed. Incorrect. Because according to his memory, Gordon was the first person to have 'played' through this scenario.

And yet, he remembered very clearly, waking up earlier than he had when he went to see Gordon. And he'd slowly started to remember a few other things, as he'd sat there, undistracted for once in a long time. Remembered wandering around Biological Research. Remembered a group game night at one of the laundromats in the Level 3 dormitories. Remembered combing through databases, for something-

He winced, rubbing at his head. Perhaps whatever had caused this 'restart' of sorts had messed with his memory code. None of these memories were making sense. He liked when things made sense. He wanted to think about literally anything else, other than that his own head was confusing him severely.

"In psychology and logic, rationalization or rationalisation, also known as making excuses, is a defense mechanism in which controversial behaviors or feelings are justified and explained in a seemingly rational or logical manner to avoid the true explanation, and are made consciously tolerable—or even admirable and superior—by plausible means. It is also an informal fallacy of reasoning-"

He clamped a hand over his mouth. He hated that he'd started doing that again (again?), his unconscious mind seeming to attempt to tell him what he was avoiding by accessing Wikipedia articles and forwarding them directly to his mouth. He could handle his normal info-dumping, such as the chair incident when he'd attempted to cheer up Gordon after such a time of stress. But this kind, where he seemed to be calling himself out, was really grating his nonexistent nerves.

He slowly stood, blinking as he heard the door to the locker room. He turned, with a smile. "Ah, hello-" He stopped, hand raised in greeting, as he stared at the person entering the room.

Dr. Freeman blinked in return, before he smiled. "Oh, hey Dr. Coomer! Sorry, I know, I should be in the test chamber already, but I'm running late." He waved, before quickly moving past him. "Hopefully it won't be delayed too much longer! I just gotta get the HEV suit on." He hurried to the back of the room, before moving through to the area where the suits are stored.

Coomer very quickly sat down on one of the benches, hands clasped together in front of him. Because he knew that man. Dr. Freeman, the actual Dr. Freeman, not Gordon 'not Freeman' that had just played through the game. But that was...impossible, wasn't it? ...Why would they have an actual version of the person that a player was supposed to play as? That seemed...incorrect. Like everything else he'd thought about so far that day.

Even more than that, was the fact that he knew Dr. Freeman. He'd consulted with him on a few of the younger man's theories for his resonance tests. Dr. Freeman had called him his mentor. But how could those memories be correct if he was just...a chunk of code? He vividly remembered, sitting down outside in an outside break area in Sector B, eating pizza that had been bought for him while Dr. Freeman rambled on about his teleportation theories, and his thoughts about frequency tuning. 'Like a radio,' He'd confirmed with the younger man, finishing his slice of veggie lover's pizza.

But...why would he remember so clearly what someone would have left as a footnote in his backstory file? Was this kind of thought why they'd split him into three hundred clones? Was it to protect him? That would be a first, from Black Mesa, doing something to protect someone else...

He barely noticed Dr. Freeman leave, only able to give him a wave in return. He slowly looked up again, when he heard the door open once more, Tommy Coolatta standing there. He gave him a look, and the other had walked over to sit with him, pulling him into his arms. He closed his eyes.

-

Benrey shifted from foot to foot, trying to pretend like he totally wasn't anxious. He was sure it was working, and the guard across the hall from him was just snickering because...he didn't know, maybe thinking of Fruit Loops or something? He'd heard once that people aren't them when they're hungry, or whatever, and he's pretty sure that that guy's job was to mind his own business or whatever.

He reached up and fidgeted with his hat, which earned another snicker. Oh man, if that guy kept that up Benrey was gonna...do something. Kinda thought throwing him down the hall would be fun, but apparently that's 'frowned upon' and 'hurts people' or whatever. So that was a no on that one. Rude, then, for the guy to laugh, if he couldn't retaliate. Hmmph.

...What was he thinking about? Right, all he had to do was wait for Gordon. Gordon was gonna come around that corner any minute now, and yell at him for messing everything up even though he totally hadn't because he'd thought he was helping, and they'd figure out how to fix it even if that meant going through the whole scenario again. Easy peasy.

Except the man who came around the corner in the HEV suit wasn't the Gordon he'd just spent three days tormenting.

"oh holy shit-" He pushed off of the wall immediately, sprinting down the hall. "freeman!" He lept towards him.

Dr. Freeman let out a yelp, turning quickly to catch Benrey against himself. Their momentum sent him backwards, slamming into the wall.

"bro! bro!! it's been, like, five-ever!" He laughed, knocking their heads together.

"Hey, Benry. I know I told you I was sick, and that's why I've been scarce." He slowly set him down, before starting to walk. "Have you been telling people I've been dead or something?"

"what? no way, that's not a cool joke. you told me that." He followed right at his side. "why? do you want me to?"

"No!" He laughed. "I'm just trying to figure out what's going on. I've been getting weird looks."

Benrey blinked slowly. "what kinda weird looks?"

"Just Tommy and H- Dr. Coomer, I guess. But they both stared at me weird. Tommy looked like he thought I died, and Dr. Coomer looked like he was having a mental breakdown." He shrugged, as if that was normal. "Was just wondering if one of your pranks had gotten out of hand again."

He thought about that for a moment. That was good to know, at least. He figured Tommy would remember what had gone on, but...Dr. Coomer sounded like he remembered some stuff too. So that was...weird? But sounded good. Then they wouldn't have to have like, some kind of emotional talk where they all figured out what the fuck was going on. He liked that. Because those talks were always awkward, and he was never invited.

But wait, put that thought on hold, he had work to do. "hey, uh, you got ID?"

Dr. Freeman raised an eyebrow. "Earth to Benny, come in Benny." He gestured to the ID he was already showing the other guard.

The other guard snickered again, opening the door.

"Are you sure you didn't prank anyone while I was gone?" He walked through the door.

He hurried quickly with him. "uh, nope, no pranks here." Did the arm thing count? Shit. "...okay one prank, but it wasn't that. or any of them. i keep my word, bro."

He smiled a bit. "I know you do. Now, I gotta get downstairs. I'm late."

"uhh, I gotta come with you. you, uh, you got...passport?" He grins. "gonna need your passport."

He shook his head with a chuckle, starting down the hall. "I've got my old one in my locker, but it's expired. My new one's on my kitchen counter back in my dorm room. ...Shit, was the policy change today?"

"'fraid so. looks, uh, like i'm just gonna have to follow you, then."

He walked into the elevator, holding the door open for him. He smiles. "Well, come on then. I'm already late enough as it is."

He skipped into the elevator, grinning back. "missed you, bro." He's not lying, he just hadn't realized how much he'd missed him while he'd been gone. Time always passed differently for him, but he felt like it probably had been a while.

"Missed you too, Benry." He pressed the elevator button. "Missed you too."

-

Bubby didn't know how the fuck to handle everything that had just happened.

He'd been checking some machines, not trusting that the other scientists wouldn't fuck up worse this time and kill Gordon for good, when suddenly Benry had come around the corner and brought Dr. Freeman with him.

He knew Dr. Freeman, he'd seen him often with Dr. Coomer, and had intentionally gotten into as many arguments as possible with the young theoretical physicist. So why had seeing him come as such a shock? He wasn't Gordon, not the Gordon from the last few days anyway. And now that he'd thought about it, that should have been obvious. The language, the irritation and confusion, hell even the hair had been all wrong since it'd been way longer and a bit unkempt.

He was supposed to be perfect, but this had slipped past him. What the hell was going on?

The two had left, heading off towards the test chamber, leaving Bubby to stand there confounded and alone. He was glad when he heard the doors behind him open again, and heard two sets of steps approaching.

"Uh, h-hello Dr. Bubby." Tommy spoke quietly as the two approached.

He turned. "Hey, Tommy. Dr. Coomer." He crossed his arms. "Do you know what the fuck is going-" His arms fell immediately. "...Dr. Coomer, are you alright?"

"I'm...yes, professor. I am normal." He sure didn't look normal. He looked stressed, freaked out, like a single breeze would knock him over. Dr. Coomer never looked so small, so weak.

"That's not the question I asked." He rested his hands on Dr. Coomer's upper arms, before looking up at Tommy. "...What's going on with him?"

"He's...having a bit of a crisis. From..." He gestured around them. "...All of it."

"So you remember, then? Both of you?"

"...Yes."

"Hmm." He glanced towards the door. "...As much as I wish we could stand here and try to figure out what's wrong, Harold, I think we all know what comes next."

Dr. Coomer tensed. "...He might..."

"Maybe we can, uh, try to...stop them?" Tommy glanced around, nervously. "Call it off, maybe?"

"We can sure as hell try." He adjusted his glasses. "Come on, we've got trouble to brew."

Dr. Coomer seemed to finally relax a bit. "I'd much rather have tea brewed...but trouble will do for now."

"Then lets hurry, we've only got a few minutes before- before he gets down there!"

The three quickly scampered down the hall, after their friends.