#people who've lived this can speak for it better than I can. but I still feel a responsibility to call it out

[sky-scribbles]

I did Taash’s second personal quest today. And every single gender-related aspect felt right. I cried in real time as Taash talked about feeling how their mother had limited their ideas of what they could be. But then when Taash needed advice on handling their gender journey, the dialogue option came up to tell them to ‘embrace Qunari culture’ or ‘embrace Rivaini culture,’ and… what the hell?

It's not just the obvious. Taash clearly should not have to choose between two aspects of their heritage and identity. That is ridiculous. But what really, really gets to me is that to ask Taash what they want when it comes to their gender, I had to encourage them to ‘choose’ being Rivaini over being Qunari.

Here’s the thing. I’m a queer author who’s spent the last year and a half talking to queer people about their experiences (specifically in the aspec community, but these issues are by no means limited to ace and aro folks). And so many queer people of colour, and those from non-Christian religions, have told me the message they keep getting from white, culturally Christian queers is 'If you're not being accepted, just leave your religion/country/community/etc so you can be yourself!' As if their heritage is something that stops them from being themself, rather than being a part of them.

And I see the shadow of this in that dialogue wheel. This suggestion that Taash embracing their nonbinary identity means that they have to reject their Qunari identity. If they want to be out and proud and queer, they have to pull away from a part of the heritage that made them. It's especially uncomfortable to me considering that Bioware have explicitly referred to the Qunari as being Muslim-coded.

Portraying a character with mixed heritage as needing to choose or favour one or the other is bad enough. But that 'choice' should definitely not be conflated with them being able to embrace their queerness. Because that is fucked. Up.

[hoeleeheeseung]

Candy

genre: smut; dom! heeseung x fem! reader

synopsis: bumping into your school's basketball captain at your cousin's party; little did you know you would find yourself pressed up against him.

warnings:, marking, fingering, use of profanity, protected sex, just pure filth throughout.

trope: academic rivals!

a/n: just trying to explore different writing genres, suggestions and requests are accepted and comments are highly appreciated <3

mdni!!

_____________________________________

You drove to your cousin Sunghoon's party, planning to drown yourself in alcohol and hoping that it would help you forget all the drama that you had to face back in school that day.

Now that you think of it, you'd rather drop out of school, than walk back in there on Monday. The memory of that incident still haunts you, you keep having flashbacks

Flashback:

" You HAVE to come to the match, it's the finals!!"

" Lia, I don't think I can come, though. Our finals are coming up and I need to do better than Heeseung this time. Plus, the fact that he's the school's basketball team captain gives me an advantage, because he'll be too engrossed in all that basketball practice and--

" Yeah yeah, Heeseung is literally all that you talk about, why don't you just fuck him already? It's not like he's not attractive, girls would kill to fuck him, plus you'd gain more of a reputation in this school than to just be the sweet nerd who's nice to everyone."

" You're joking, right? There's no way I'm fucking him, besides, Heeseung looks like he has no idea where the dick goes during sex."

"Are you sure? I'm sure I can treat you well, princess."

you flinched, you felt his hot breath on your neck, as his tall figure stood behind you.

Heeseung pushed past you and winked at you before he made his way back to class.

End of Flashback

You sighed before you rang the doorbell, waiting for Sunghoon to open the door.

"Hello, piggy! How've you been?"

" Not in the mood, Sunghoon. Can't talk today, just need to drink through it."

Sunghoon immediately got serious, because he knew better than to fuck around with you when you're feeling low.

" Want to talk about it? I can fix you a drink"

You nodded as you walked into his penthouse, following him straight to the kitchen, as you prepared yourself to narrate the entire incident.

" It's a lot more packed today than the rest of your parties, Hoon, are you celebrating something?"

He shrugged

" Nah, not really, I just figured that there are a lot more people like you who've had a bad end to the week, so it's an open party for the people living in my apartment complex; anyways, what were you on about?"

You sighed, before ranting it all out.

" No way, why the fuck would you and your friend talk about such shit in public? It's like you WANTED him to hear your conversation.

" Don't lecture me about what I've done wrong, just help me. Speaking of the basketball captain, what the fuck is he doing here?"

Sunghoon stared at you in confusion

" What? who?"

You pointed at Heeseung, who was standing next to Sunghoon's lamp in the living room, talking to someone.

"That guy? That's Heeseung, he stays upstairs, and he's a sweet guy."

" Yeah, Hoon, maybe for you, but that's the guy I've been talking about and if he notices me, I'm dead"

As if the universe was against you, Heeseung made eye contact with you right after you said that, with a look of confusion plastered on his face.

" Great, now he knows I'm here."

Heeseung started walking towards you, as Sunghoon waited to see what would happen.

" Y/n? What are you doing here?"

You rolled your eyes at him

" Attending a party?"

He scoffed in response.

" I meant, how do you know Sunghoon?"

You wanted Heeseung to leave, if not leave the party, then at least for him to leave you alone, so you said the first thing that came to your mind.

"He's my boyfriend"

eww, why would you say that??, you thought to yourself.

Sunghoon spat his drink at your response, muffling his laugh.

"She's lying, Heeseung, I'm her cousin. I don't know why she said that. Anyways, I'll leave her to you, since you already know each other, I have other guests to attend to."

Sunghoon walked off as he said that, he knew you were going to get back at him for this one, but more than 75% of your problems would have been solved if you just talked shit out.

You stood awkwardly, cussing Sunghoon out for not backing you up.

" Sweet home Alabama, am I right?"

Heeseung cackled, someone had to break the ice, right?

" Go away, Lee, you're the last person I want to see today, or ever, for that matter."

Heeseung laughed at your futile attempt to make him walk away. He then leaned town to whisper into your ear.

" Really? I thought I should show you just how well I can use my dick; show you how well I can make you scream my name."

" Shut up, Lee."

" You brought it up, love. I'm just saying, the offer's still up."

" Don't you have a match to prepare for? Besides, we're at my cousin's place"

" The match has been taken care of, we're all set. Also, I live in the penthouse upstairs, so we don't have to do anything here."

He whispered again, his lips brushing against your ear, as he held a solo cup in his hand, wrapping his hand around your waist.

He slowly bit your ear, slightly licking it.

You felt yourself leaning into his touch, gripping on to the collar of his black button up, as he pressed you against the counter, his tall figure masking you from other people's gaze.

You felt his bulge against your inner thigh, feeling yourself starting to get wet.

" You came here to drink your problems away, didn't you, love? Well, guess what? I can fuck your problems away; you just have to say yes."

Now, you could feel your knees getting weaker, as you leaned more into his touch if it was even possible.

" Fuck you, Heeseung."

He smirked against your ear

" Do you want to, princess?"

You felt yourself nodding against his chest, sniffing in his musky scent.

" Use your words, love."

You let out a breathy yes, and that was all it took for him to discard the cup in his hand, wrapping his hand around your waist.

Heeseung walked out of Sunghoon's penthouse, with his hands still around your waist. He walked towards the elevator with you and smashed his lips against yours once you were both in the elevator.

Once you reached his penthouse, he slammed the door shut before pressing you against the door, as you moaned into the kiss.

He leaned back, to get a better view of your outfit, immediately going back in for a kiss, as his hands roamed around your body.

"Hope you've gotten good pictures clicked for the gram, darling, because I'll be making your mascara run down that pretty face of yours"

He had a way with words, and he knew it.

You kept trying to rub your clothed body against him, which made him grab you firmly.

" Now, sweetheart, be patient, let me do all the work, let me worship you"

He immediately kissed you neck, holding onto your waist, pulling you closer, as he licked and sucked the skin around your neck.

You felt your nipples harden, and you were soaking wet, by now.

Heeseung held the strap of your dress between his teeth, slowly pulling it down, as his hands reached under your dress to feel your wetness.

"mmh, so wet for me, aren't you, love? Let's take this to the bedroom"

you nodded, you were impatient, you wanted him to fuck you so bad.

"Jump, princess"

You immediately wrapped your legs around him, as his hand held your ass, and his mouth now kissing your shoulder blades.

He walked to the bedroom, with his thumbs rubbing against your clit.

He immediately pushed you against his bedroom door and finally pulled your dress down, now leaving you in your underwear and bra. He smirked at the view in front of him.

His hands roamed around your body, trying to memorize every curve of yours, as you kissed him impatiently.

You started unbuttoning his shirt, as he quickly got out of his pants.

He held you by the nape of your neck, as his other hand rubbed circles against your clit.

He slowly started to guide you towards his bed as he unhooked your bra and slid your underwear down. he started marking your neck and leaving hickeys all over your neck as he made his way down to your cleavage, licking and sucking whatever part of your body that he could.

You pulled his hair, moaning into his neck, marking his neck, licking his Adam's apple.

Heeseung leaned back for a moment

" You sure about this, baby?"

You moaned a yes out, as you pulled him closer to kiss him again.

" Heeseung- t-ouch me"

He smirked, as his chest pressed against your tits.

"I will, love, be patient"

He sucked your right boob as he intertwined one hand with yours.

Heeseung slowly slid his ring finger into your hole, moving slowly, giving you time to adjust to his thick finger

" Baby, you're so tight, are you nervous?"

he breathed

"Nu-nuh, want you to f-fuck!"

He quickly pushed a second finger in, still sucking your boobs as you rested your hands on his chest.

He moaned when he felt your hand grab his cock.

" A-urgh"

You pulled his boxers down, holding his sensitive cock in your hands, gently rubbing it, making him moan louder.

" Wan-t yo-u deep insi-de, lee-fuck"

You thrust into his fingers as you felt them go deeper in, his fingers had completely vanished into your hole.

Heeseung pulled his fingers out, as he grabbed a condom out of his drawer, placing the packet between his teeth, ripping it apart.

" Do you want to help me put it on?"

You snatched the condom from his hands and sat up to roll it onto his cock.

He snaked his hands around your waist as he buried his mouth into your wetness, licking it a few times before spitting into your hole.

Heeseung looked at you, maintaining eye contact

" Keep looking into my eyes, love. Scream ' RED" if it gets too much"

You nodded, as he finally started entering you.

You moaned, the feeling of your hole clenching against his cock was ecstatic.

" Bab-y you sound s-good,"

Heeseung pulled out of you, just to immediately thrust back in, maintaining eye contact with you.

" I make your-tits bounce so good-don't I?"

You moaned in response, not being able to form full sentences.

You suddenly rolled over, getting on top of him, slowly riding him.

You left him moaning, grabbing your boobs and squeezing them as they bounced.

He sat up, making his dick go deeper in you, as his hands roamed around your body, with him leaving wet kisses around your neck.

You rubbed your hands against his back, scratching every inch on skin on his back.

He thrust into you again, continuing to do so, making you moan louder every time.

" Hee, I'm close"

"Hold it"

Just as you thought you were going to come, he flipped you over and pressed you against the bed, thrusting into you from behind, as he held your hair with his hand.

" NOW!"

Both you and Heeseung came undone together as you moaned with the feeling of pleasure from the sounds of your juices mixing up.

Heeseung lay next to you

" You taste like the sweetest candy, love."

He pulled you closer before falling asleep with you in his arms.

_____________________________________

[blackpilljesus]

Can we not just stop birthing men like... women have to stop giving life to men.

I'm doing my part ✌️ and I agree but collectively most women wouldn't. I remember when there was discourse over a radfem having & celebrating giving birth to a baby boy. I've seen radfems praise lesbian couples adopting baby boys.

Tbh a lot of women are sellouts, they sellout other women & even betray themselves for love or having a slightly higher social status in society. When forced to cohabit with predators that have more power & essentially want to reproduce a copy of themselves, women giving them that could elevate or secure their status in society - it's an incentive & many would go for it.

Another thing to consider is that many women birth maIes to spare their lives, there's been cases where maIes would kill their partners & daughters for the woman not having a son (even though the sperm determines the sex). Part of me considers maternal instincts of women not being able to kill their maIe offspring bc that's still their child but then I think of post partum psychosis & cultures where daughters are routinely killed when they're born. If these instincts applied to maIe & female children I dont think things would've gotten this bad. Also a lot of women treat their sons much better than their daughters.

In a patriarchial society, birthing sons lets boymoms live out their power fantasies through their sons. They 'borrow' power from their sons or use their sons as a proxy for power. Like toxic mother in-laws treating their daughter in-laws like shit bc it's through the association that this woman is married to their son, women that cover up their sons sex crimes, in some cultures; boymoms look for women who've undergone FGM for their sons.

Bear in mind so many women still have faith in maIes as a collective, they think they'll raise the "good ones". This notion is popular in feminist spaces, women think they'll magically train & raise maIe allies. There's a saying of how several boymoms have emotional incest with their sons, they see there aren't good maIes in society so they want to create their own one(s).

However I think the biggest issue is that women are never going to be sociopathic or apathetic enough to moids. It would take a high level of apathy to abort maIe fetuses & refuse to birth another xy solely on the basis of their sex, to get to this point you'd need to have this feeling towards maIes generally and most women dont have this. MaIe survival is contentigent on female subjugation, women dont need to subjugate maIes to survive, we carry life, we can also provide for ourselves & maIes know it which is why they've set up societies the way they are and they're brutal about it because they and their bloodlines would be dead anyways if they dont have a system forcing women to rely on them to survive. That said; In the end despite everything, many women still want to partner with maIes, many women still love & believe in maIes. Most women wont disassociate with maIes collectively, catherine mckinnon goes into this in her book "the second sex" where she speaks about how women are scattered everywhere & identify with the tribes maIes put them into as opposed to seeing themselves as a sovereign group.

I personally dont think birthing another oppressor is worth it but people are different. Of course this can (& does) backfire against women but by the time the damage is realised it's too late. Ultimately for a shift in gender ratio & for women to refuse to birth maIes at any cost, they need to think bigger than themselves individually. Think of womankind instead of maIe supremacy & its structures but this will never happen & I wont kid myself otherwise.

[stephobrien]

Reminders for my fellow pro-Palestine peeps, because it sounds like some of y'all need this:

Being furious at Israel's government, army, settlers who are attacking Palestinian civilians and driving them out of their homes, and the protesters who are currently blocking aid to Gaza is absolutely legitimate. Taking it out on random Jewish people who are in no way complicit is bigoted, immoral, and counterproductive.

Israel =/= all Jewish people. Many Jewish people are actively speaking, protesting, campaigning, or otherwise acting against the current genocide, and have been protesting Israel's apartheid policies long before many of us became aware of them. There are also many Jewish people who are simply living their lives with no involvement in this conflict. Neither deserve to be lumped in with criminals who happen to be of the same heritage/religion.

Terrorizing innocent Jewish people will only make some of them more inclined to want a place where they don't have to deal with people like YOU, which is one of the ways Israel gets supporters. (The current Israeli government's treatment of Jewish dissidents, its history of propping up Hamas, and its insistence on antagonizing its neighbours make its claims of offering safety to Jews highly questionable, but that's a whole other topic.)

It's true that some people have used accusations of antisemitism to shut down legitimate criticism of behaviour that shouldn't be tolerated from ANYONE. It's also true that ACTUAL antisemitism is real and dangerous. Real antisemitism has been a problem for millennia, it's created serious generational and cultural trauma, and we shouldn't allow actual antisemites to use Israel's policies and the worst of its citizens as an excuse to harm innocent Jewish people.

There are genuinely antisemitic ways to voice legitimate criticism. If you criticize an objectively heinous action, while tying said action to the perpetrator's Jewishness or using it to invoke antisemitic stereotypes, you may be right to criticize the action, but you're still being antisemitic in the way you do it.

Jewish people are people whose lives and safety have value whether or not they advocate for Palestine. Don't treat their worth as human beings as if it's dependent on their advocacy.

There are probably more things that need to be said on this subject, but it's late at night and my brain's turning to fudge, so I'll leave it at this:

Call out crimes and lies, and advocate for Palestinian freedom and equality, but don't be a dickbag to innocent Jewish people about it. And if you see someone being actually antisemitic, call them out on it.

Also, if someone more knowledgeable than me would like to add any pointers on how to distinguish between Actual Antisemitism and Genocide Apologists Trying to Get Away With Crimes by Crying "Antisemitism," that would be great. I'm trying, but I know people who've lived on the receiving end of antisemitism understand it better than my goy ass can.

[jalwyn21]

The thing that pisses me off the most about Swifties talking about Joe using public transport as a British person is how oblivious they clearly are to how class even works in the UK. I know some other people have said this but it just really shows their ignorance. Joe is from what would be considered an upper middle class background which is literally just a couple of steps below aristocracy in Britain. If you actually look at his family history, he's got some very influential family members. Plus, his family is clearly in a position to support not only his but Patrick's goals of acting. In Patrick's case studying internationally. And I believe Tom went to Cambridge. That's three children from London (one of the most expensive cities in the world) who've had a very expensive education.

There is such a disparity in class in Britain and London especially. Generally speaking, the people that get to have careers in acting are the ones that have the resources to fund it as well as the connections. While there are certainly working class people who become successful in the field, most don't even get the chance because of the class disparity. James McAvoy has spoken on this. Now this isn't shading Joe or his family because they are clearly good people and Joe is very talented (and I'm sure Patrick is too) and has worked hard but the fact is they have had resources and privileges that many other British people don't have. So for these swifties who would obviously know what the Alwyn's actual financial background is and the connections they have (because they seem to stalk Joe's every move) to use him travelling on the tube as something to prove how poor he is and make fun of him, is truly offensive to me personally as someone who grew up working class. I like Joe and I have nothing against his family at all but it bothers me that these swifties would take what is a genuine issue that so many people in Britain deal with and apply it to a man that most definitely has not dealt with it for the sole purpose of making fun of him.

Also, for all Taylor likes to talk about having to move to a foreign country and live in a rental house, if her relationship with Joe is any indication, she obviously did not live the life a regular British person would live. Hell even if she hadn't been with Joe at the time, she wouldn't have experienced that regular life because while Joe at the time was just a normal person, she was still Taylor Swift.

I think swifties in particular but most Americans in general can't wrap their heads around the concept of Europe. Seriously, it's a thing.. 🤷‍♀️

And yes, Joe is lucky enough to have had a good life and a good family and the best education money can buy.

The thing with Joe, is that you don't feel it. You don't feel how privileged he is because he is not disconnected from reality and he doesn't rub it in people's faces.

He genuinely doesn't think he is better than other people. Joe knows how to be normal. You know the yogurt boy jokes? Yeah, it only shows that even as a teenager he was more grounded than she will ever be. He built character. She built billions. 🤷‍♀️

And to be fair about Europe.. the public transportation is not bad so I think everyone uses it, regardless of how much money they have. 🤭

But yeah, the Joe is poor jokes are very offensive and in the poor taste I've come to expect from swifties.

Also, bragging about someone else being a billionaire is not the win they think it is. Especially if you consider that the people who made her a billionaire are probably struggling with the cost of living... 🙄

[toujokaname]

Game master / Episode 21

Author: Akira

Characters: Aira, Rinne, Kohaku, HiMERU, Tatsumi, Mayoi

"I'm grateful, I honestly am."

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[ Read on my site for a better viewing experience using Ois~su ♪ ]

Season: Winter

Location: Matrix Stage

Aira: —Hwah?!

(H-Huh? Where... is this?)

(It's bright! My eyes are adjusting after being in the dark for so long, but somehow, after dodging those weirdos for ages, we've stumbled into this wide area!)

(What are these, fireflies? Stars? I can't tell, but there are so many lights floating around!)

(What's this mysterious space...?)

Rinne: Welcome.

Did you have fun with the test of courage?

Aira: Ah, there he is, the mastermind! Look, Hiro-kun, Kohakucchi, the culprit's shown himself! Now beat him up!

Kohaku: Right. But before that, mind clearin' a few things up?

What the hell's all this about?

Rinne: Gyahaha, what a dumbass question! "Teacher! I don't even know what I don't know!" That's literally you.

Kohaku: Shut up. I ain't in the mood to go along with your stand-up comedy, especially after havin' to play tag with those mysterious masked guys 'til just now.

Quit stallin' and fess up already, or I'll roll you up in a bamboo mat and plunge you into the sea, ya halfwit. [1]

Rinne: No wayyy, ever since getting involved with Double Face, my child's turned into a delinquent...

Kohaku: I've been a delinquent from the get-go~... If anythin', I've been gradually becomin' a good kid since then.

Rinne: Yeah. By now you must've figured I'm sketchy, and that Matrix has an ulterior motive, yet you've obediently played along until the very end.

To repay those feelings, I'm gonna show you guys something good.

This is—my real hometown.

Kohaku: Rinne-han's hometown...?

Rinne: What I've shown you so far is only the surface of our hometown.

Think of it like the layer that hides something important, the armor shielding something fragile.

To put it in extreme terms, unless we're talking about a completely different dimension—

Environments completely cut off from the outside world only exist, if at all, within specially treated equipment in a lab.

While our hometown may have a pretense of self-reliance, we still need to be connected to the outside world. For food, water, and other essentials.

Rinne: The Amagi Village you visited is a contact point set up for that purpose—it's nothing more than a bridgehead or a frontline base.

It's a fake Amagi Village, so to speak.

And this space, it's where the village meets the outside world, linked to our hometown—you could call it a gateway.

Look, you can vaguely make out a door in the back, right? Beyond there lies the real Amagi Village.

It's where we're from. After following a long, long tunnel from there, we reach the hometown where we were born and raised

Kohaku: Yeah, I see it. There's this faintly visible buildin' in the distance. Looks oddly modern—is that Rinne-han's real hometown?

Rinne: Yeah. To those expecting a stereotypical backward village from a movie, my condolences, but this ain't exactly the old-fashioned countryside that everyone imagines.

In terms of scientific power alone, we might be more advanced than you.

Making buildings levitate in the air with perpetual motion machines and anti-gravity is as simple as pie, unlike anything you guys can achieve.

HiMERU: Is this a story from a sci-fi novel?

Rinne: It's a story from reality. If I explain too much, even as the monarch, I might be held accountable, so I can't divulge all the details.

Well, mysteries are better in some ways, they let your imagination run wild ♪

Rinne: Maybe we're descendants of aliens who came from outer space. Or maybe we're underground dwellers who've lived in hiding on the other side of the earth.

Or maybe we're the descendants of a persecuted people, defeated by the Yamato Imperial Court and repeatedly driven into distant corners in ancient times.

Our origins don't matter. What matters is that we're intelligent beings who can talk and share our feelings with you.

Unlike insects or animals, we can do the same work as you.

We can live in the same society.

We can even become idols.

Tatsumi: It's clear that you, that all of you, are unfamiliar beings.

But if we share the same aspirations, we should be able to coexist. Isn't that so, Mayoi-san?

Mayoi: Yes, Tatsumi-san. That's why I, too, am shamelessly living here with you all.

Rinne: It's strange, isn't it, underground dwellers? We're people who may have different births and upbringings, maybe even different races, yet we wear the same clothing and sing the same songs.

And so, we can love and be loved by everyone. That's good, isn't it. It's a miracle.

Rinne: There's someone who taught me that such miracles really do exist.

Back in my teenage years, I longed for the outside world so much that I ran away from my hometown. After getting lost for a while, I ended up on some street corner—

And found someone singing and smiling.

It was an unknown idol, to the point where nobody knows his name anymore. Maybe not even Ai-chan, who loves idols so much, knows him.

A long time ago, he couldn't sell anything and ended up retiring.

And yet, that idol, who was nothing special at all and could be found anywhere—at the time, I was just some little kid and looked up to him.

When I seriously ran away from home and pursued becoming an idol, he helped me a lot. He was a kind guy who taught me the basics of how to be an idol.

His producer in charge was Akan-san, and when he retired and she was left with some free time, she decided to produce me too.

She managed to turn me into a proper idol, one way or another.

In the end, during my solo days, I couldn't keep up with the times, and I was left completely stranded when the bigwigs at my agency fell from power with "SS."

Even before that, I hardly had any jobs; I was essentially open for business but had none. That was just the final straw, or rather, the fatal blow.

Rinne: Despite being meant to disappear quietly like that, why is it that someone like me is still able to stand on stage even now?

It's all thanks to my benefactors who taught me how to live as an idol.

It's because of them that I've been able to love being an idol and still not be disillusioned.

I'm grateful, I honestly am.

[ ☆ ]

Kohaku's referring to "sumaki," a term associated with a method of execution. This method involved throwing someone wrapped in a mat into water, often resulting in death. While not a formal punishment for crimes, it was commonly employed in extrajudicial killings by bakuto, the predecessors to modern yakuza.

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[daandyli0n]

Which of ur aus would u says ur favourite (or ur main one)

i'd definitely say it's Blurred Lenses atm!

it also has a lot of au's that spawned from its canon timeline (if you wanna hear about any of 'em, i'd be glad to ramble!)

here's some fun facts about the MCI kids, because I Love Them, They're My Babies:

Susie:

full name is Susanna Diane Nichols

Birthday: March 3rd, 1973

Age (at time of death): 7

Death Date: June 13th, 1980

still the first. and the soul inside of Chica.

generally rather cheerful and upbeat!

really likes animals, but dogs are her favorite :]

her family is middle-class, and she's...pretty sheltered. not to an extreme extent, but still.

her dog's name was Peaches.

as a spirit, Susie is usually referred to by employees/people who've seen her as "The Faceless Girl." as the years went on, and Susie's identity issues worsened, she began to lose more and more of her facial features until all that was left was her eyes.

for Susie, the line between her and Chica's identity started blurring to where she couldn't tell where She ended and Chica began. it got bad enough that, if any of the spirits needed to talk to her, they'd have to do so Very directly by getting close to her and speaking in her face.

all of the memory and identity stuff scares her, by the way.

of all the spirits, she's the most terrified of William. she will quite literally avoid the fucker like the plague unless another spirit is with her.

autistic

Fritz (Jr.):

full name is Fritz Kennedy Smith Jr. he's technically also referred to as Fritz Kennedy Andrews, but he likes that name less due to Reasons (their stepdad sucks and is abusive)

Birthday: August 3rd, 1965

Age (at time of death): 14

Death Date: June 17th, 1980

the second! soul inside of Foxy

hoo boy...this kid went through a lot of shit. personality wise, he was rather lonely and just...kinda sad. he stays off to himself a lot, off to the side. he's Very determined, though, and has a bit of a temper. (kinda like his bio dad in that regard)

demiboy, he/they

a fun fact that, technically, i've only really told my bestie: Fritz is intersex.

their bio dad lives by himself and was a recovering alcoholic (wanted to better himself for his son; relapsed HARD after Jr. died). their bio dad didn't have a Lot of money, but was slowly working his way to living a comfortable life. he also worked as a car mechanic and would teach Jr. some skills on a few occasions when they'd visit.

Fritz, like his father, is Irish.

they are David's half/stepbrother

they were on the high school track team, and they showed a lot of promise! they were planning on being in track for all of high school. they like running in general.

Foxy was his favorite...and also his comfort character.

for reasons that aren't entirely clear, as a spirit, Fritz's wounds seem to release this red mist sort of substance, and their hair fades off into mist at the ends. due to this, Fritz is generally referred to as "The Misty Boy." the fact that Fritz generally likes hiding in the shadows doesn't help.

Fritz is one of the more aggressive spirits, along with Mimi and David. however, Fritz generally likes staying off by himself.

AuDHD (but with more issues with attention than with hyperactivity)

Gabi (Gabrielle):

full name is Gabrielle Angel Fitzgerald-Hernández

Birthday: June 20th, 1975

Age (at time of death): 5

Death Date: June 20th, 1980

the third, and the soul inside of Freddy.

really really energetic and bubbly!! absolute sweetheart :]

transfem! (doesn't 100% know that's what's going on with her gender, though. just kinda went 'hm, wonder what being a girl's like' and her parents decided to let her try out being a girl for a bit. turns out she thinks it's cool :])

she's Jeremy Fitzgerald's little sister!

her family's...struggling a bit, but they do the best they can for their two children.

her family's got a lot of nicknames for her. the main one (aside from Gabi, obviously) is Girasol, the Spanish word for Sunflower.

Gabi's father is black, and her mother came from Cuba when she was younger.

she's Mimi's best friend. they are almost Polar opposites, though.

she's generally known as "The Confused Girl," because she seems almost constantly scared with no idea of what's happening. she's surrounded by this garbled laughing/screaming sound, but almost always seems to be crying/sobbing.

she sticks to the shadows in order to "catch [William] by surprise." this works better than you think it would for a giant robotic bear.

AuDHD (with more issues with hyperactivity/impulsiveness)

Mimi (Jeremy):

full name is Jeremy Isaiah McKenzie

Birthday: July 22nd, 1975

Age (at time of death): 4

Death Date: June 20th, 1980 (lured with Gabi)

Mimi is rather quiet, but also smart for a kid their age. they're rather socially awkward, and not good at interacting with their peers. due to issues with tone, and speaking in a rather matter-of-factly fashion, Mimi usually (unintentionally) comes off as pretentious or like a smartass.

Mimi is, technically (due to not really knowing either of these terms specifically, but just kinda not giving a fuck about Weird Gender Stuff after dying), transfem agender. they/she/he (with the pronouns being preferred in that order. similarly, they're fine with being referred to as both Mimi and Jeremy, they just prefer Mimi).

Mimi's family is like. lower middle class, i'd say. dad's a teacher (specifically a science teacher at the high school), mom works at an office. has three siblings and is the youngest.

really really big interest in space. thank their dad for that one.

Gabi's their bestie...and probably Only friend aside from Cassidy (CC).

Mimi is incredibly cautious, and anxious. also had some mild anger issues prior to their murder...that Immediately got much worse after dying.

they're referred to as "The Aggressive Spirit." as you can probably guess, they're one of the more violent spirits. understandable, considering they got murdered with their best friend on said bestie's birthday.

they just stick with Gabi most of the time. wanna keep her safe and make sure William can't hurt her anymore.

autistic

David:

full name is David Miller Andrews

Birthday: April 20th, 1970

Age (at time of death): 10

Death Date: June 23rd, 1980

David's...odd. a bit eccentric, generally quiet and pissed off, and seems to be uncaring of others (this is due to them having low empathy, however, and not because they Genuinely Don't Care). they have a vibe of pure Bitterness and Distrust at the world. specifically, for the adults who failed them.

David is nonbinary (doesn't know that specific term due to Time Period), and uses they/them.

their family is...between Poor and Middle Class, but leaning more towards poor. a mom who always works, and accidentally neglects her kids as a result, and an abusive, alcoholic father who isn't doing their finances any favors with his habits. some days, they walk through the house as though on eggshells, others...well, What Happens, Happens, as David says.

they honestly view Fritz as the only good thing in that household. sure would be a shame if anything Bad happened to Fritz, then, huh?

...so David died (by springlocking) because they ran off to go find Fritz-

they're the Vengeful Spirit

David's really strong as a spirit due to Agony Reasons.

body got dumped in a lake by the Afton House; they're associated with water/drowning due to that, even if drowning isn't what killed them.

AuDHD (but with more issues with attention than with hyperactivity)

that's all for now!! just some fun things :]

[walkingstackofbooks]

DS9 4x05 Rejoined thoughts (I’m re-watching, so beware spoilers for future episodes!)

[28 June '23]

"It's a trick!" "Of course it's a trick!" Oh, Quark 😆

"Painfully shy, introverted, a slight lack of confidence, just the kind of person who might want to dazzle the world with his magical abilities." - Okay, new headcanon that Julian is speaking from experience from when he was younger - he decided magic tricks would be how he'd make friends at new schools.

Interesting camera angle from Sisko's window

"Am I that dispensable around here?" "We'll never notice you're gone." I love their easy friendship and joking <3

"I'll be fine." That waver in her voice though ~

I love that Kira is the one who extensively knows Jadzia's lives. And I love how it really feels like they are all - even Quark - really, actually friends now.

The way Kira breaks into laughter at Julian's trick, I love her smile!

Kira's little touch of his arm, I live for platonic displays of affection.

"The Trill feel very strongly that it's unnatural." "Unnatural?" I LOVE Kira! Her outrage is just SO cathartic

"I don't understand how two people who've fallen in love, and made a life together, can be forced to walk away from each other because of a taboo." I know DS9 could generally have hit harder on LGBT topics, but this is Actually Very Good

"Curzon was even late for his hundredth birthday party." "You're never gonna let me forget that, are you?" Interesting that she switched from Ben's use of Curzon to "me" - highlighting how much she is the other hosts as well as herself.

"I'll be fine," she says, while pinning her badge on upside-down. 😅

"What do Klingons dream about?" I love Kira's gaiety and curiosity here

Hah! Had forgotten Worf's "Things that would send cold chills down your spine and wake you in the middle of the night. It is better you do not know. Excuse me." Okay I do like his deadpan humour.

"Quite an audience." "Seems a shame to disappoint them. Maybe we should do something." Their entire conversation at the party is electric

That purposeful look away they both do when the guy leaves them alone on the bridge.

"That's because you were a pilot and it made me nervous. Made her nervous. Torias being a pilot made Nilani nervous." The mixing up of pronouns - I love how complex the whole situation is allowed to be

"And whatever part of me is still Torias is very sorry and wishes he'd listened to you." - Lenara's nod of acknowledgment.. ohhh, I knew this episode was amazing but I'd forgotten just how compelling and emotional the threads all the way through were

"Would you be interested in dinner? I mean, I'm having dinner with some friends and I thought you might like to go along." I've never seen Jadzia this uncertain of herself!

Pffff Jadzia you made all that up about having dinner with friends?! You've got it baaad

"Something tells me I should say no, but you know I won't." Oh, Julian. And that kiss on the cheek!

Julian's so sulky, my goodness, what a child (affectionate)

Their chemistry is SO - JUST - Y'KNOW

No, I can't even, his little face is so scrunchy! I'm sorry ladies, let's go back and rewatch you rather than Julian being too ridiculous.

"Curzon would be horrified I'm a scientist." I thought Jadzia was a scientist before getting joined so didn't he know?

"The irony is, you and I have more in common than Torias and Nilani ever did." And that is what makes a tragedy 💔

Julian's complete startlement when he's hailed on comms 😂

"I think he enjoyed himself... Maybe not." You think? Especially if you were going through the highlights of your life he's already heard :p

Lenara just giving her the earrings!!! Like it's nothing!!! Like it's not deeply romantic!! I cannot be normal about these two!!!

"There is nothing going on, alright?" But you wish it were, don't you, Lenara?

Jadzia's so pretty in her gown and hair down (she's always pretty shhhh)

"I don't want to do anything to hurt you." Guyssss

Jadzia's brief touch to Lenara's face and forcing herself to take her hand away I cannn't

"I missed you." Oh boy the first time watching this thinking they were going to kiss? But no, and being disappointed but not wholly surprised, it's the 90s BUT NO WHAT'S THIS, they actually DO KISS and it's just so tender. This episode has my entire heart o swear.

I hate that this reasoning why Jadzia should stay away - that the consequence of exile would impact Dax the symbiont - makes sense (even if the taboo doesn't). And that Benjamin can sound so reasonable in trying to dissuade her.

"But I also know I love her, Benjamin." MY HEART

"If you're sure, if this is what you really want, I will back you all the way." After all the other arguments, thank you Ben, that means a lot. <3

Actually, no - it's weird that Dax is seen as a passive part of this decision - the poor symbiont who'll die if Jadzia gets herself exiled - but it's Dax who also, as far as I understand, very much has feelings for Kahn and Nilani, just as much as Jadzia does for Lenara et al. So Dax should also have a say through their link woth their host if they want to choose love over exile.

Jadzia's striding down the corridor to rescue Lenara (and others, ofc)

"I don't want to lose you, not again." "Not again. Never again. Never again. Never." MY HEART, DAMN YOU 90S, WORF WAS NO REPLACEMENT FOR THIS

Jadzia getting down eagerly onto her knees as she asks Lenara to stay. She's so sure she'll accept! And why shouldn't she be!

"Everyone is trying to look out for us. Protect us from ourselves." THIS IS STILL SO RELEVANT

"I can always come back later." I can't help thinking, what if she did change her mind a few years later... Maybe in that 3 month window between season 6 and 7? ... Why am I making myself sad like this? 😭😭😭

The way their eyes meet. Fuck this episode. (affectionate)

God, Jadzia was a wreck over that phasing-planet guy - what she's going to be like over Lenara who she's known for centuries? I just wanna hug her

This is just such a good story though, like even without the gay metaphor and actual gayness, aliens having dilemmas over their society's morality is fascinating, and the Trill very much so!

[vastayan--vigilante]

Writing a background canon character - filling the gaps

Now, obviously, we know very little about Scar from the canon material - he only has two lines ("Hey," and "Firelights!') and has less than 3 minutes of screen time. As far as canon characters go, he's a pretty blank slate.

(Very cool design though. Definite blorbo material.)

Writing characters like this can be challenging, but it can also be fun, because it gives you significantly more creative license. Especially when you take into account all the little details from the show you can build off of. So, here's a list of a few little headcanons I've developed for my portrayal of Scar from Arcane.

Headcanon #1: Scar is an ex-addict

The basis for this is, essentially, that I got a little bug in my brain about when Ekko says to Vi:

"Everyone here was either an addict or a victim - they needed somewhere safe to start again."

Because when he says that line, the camera pans to Scar.

We see what Shimmer does to people in the show. We see how it can destroy them - whether it makes them monstrous supersoldiers for Silco, or deformed, desperate shells of their former selves. But we also see people using it casually in The Last Drop. We see strong, cunning warriors like Sevika using it as a combat enhancer. We see even it used as a medicine ingredient, when Caitlyn trades in her gun for a Shimmer-infused potion to save Vi's life.

So the effects of Shimmer use is clearly on a spectrum. We know the extreme end of Shimmer addiction looks like this:

This is what Silco has done to The Lanes. This is what Ekko is trying to stop - to save people from.

So, what about addicts who've managed to break their deadly Shimmer habit before it was too late, who managed to get clean? Well, technically, we've seen them too. Because by Ekko's own admission, there are ex-addicts in the Firelights. Ekko is doing more than just destroying Shimmer shipments; he is taking in addicts off the street, and helping them clean their act up, giving them a chance to start over anew.

Now, addiction is a very dangerous condition with a very high relapse/failure rate. Having a strong support system to help you is integral to maintaining sobriety - but so is seeing other people who have gone through the same struggle with relapsing as you, fought that battle, and won. And what better example to inspire people and show that it's possible, than the Firelights' own second in command?

Willpower and self-discipline is key to successful addiction recovery, and many recovered addicts have turned their lives around through making healthier lifestyle changes. We see Scar is physically very active and in amazing shape; he clearly works out regularly and at a high intensity. Also, we see him get back up to fight time and time again after taking a beating. That takes tremendous willpower and discipline.

As well as making healthier lifestyle changes, recovered addicts also commonly immerse themselves in community outreach to try and support fellow addicts, to provide support and awareness and help others in their recovery. As a Firelight, Scar is clearly actively invested in helping other Fissurefolk who've been harmed by Silco's operations, and in getting Shimmer off the streets by destroying shipments.

When sabotaging Silco's shimmer shipment, Ekko and Eve both have speaking lines, but Scar is silent as he surveys all the barrels of Shimmer. He also notably keeps his distance - sending other Firelights down into the hold to destroy any Shimmer below, taking up a vantage point in the rafters to cover his comrades while they deal with preparing to burn the barrels. He also chooses to attack Jinx head on without hesitation, in an effort to buy the other Firelights more time to do this. (Coincidence? Probably lmao. But it also works for my headcanon, as it could be interpreted that Scar is wary of handling Shimmer himself/still occasionally experiences temptation)

Ekko and Scar are tight. They are bros. There is a clear bond of mutual trust and respect there. We see them both save each other's life; we see Scar set Ekko's leg with care. What was it that garnered Scar's loyalty and established such a strong working relationship? We don't know. Could it be that Ekko saved Scar's life by helping him get clean and giving him a cause to fight for, to live for? Well, that's what I'm rolling with for my portrayal, since no one can tell me otherwise ¯\ _(ツ)_/¯

NOTE: I write my version of Scar as someone who's in advanced stage of recovery during the events of Act II/Act III in canon - meaning, he has been clean for years, and while he still occasionally experiences temptation, he is stable and has well-established coping mechanisms in place to avoid relapsing.

Headcanon #2: Scar is not his birth name

I personally reckon that "Scar" is a nickname that stemmed from the distinctive scar across his lip

I'm rolling with the idea that he prefers to go by Scar because:

a) It's a cool-sounding nickname, that I imagine he earned as an accolade after he split his lip open in a particularly nasty fight to protect his younger street kid friends

b) He carried shame about the person he used to be, and taking on this new name was one of the changes he chose to make in his effort to become someone better - someone stronger, who could fight and take hits to keep others safe, owning the fact that he had survived horrible things and not been broken by them (this also makes him an interesting narrative foil to contrast with someone like Jinx, who took on her moniker to embrace the worst parts of herself)

For my own personal reference I'm gonna jot down here that I headcanon his birth name to be Valkos (this may or may not ever come up)

Headcanon #3: Scar has a family

Okay, obviously it has been confirmed that he has a baby daughter

For the sake of my portrayal, his daughter is gonna be called Ahri

His daughter is very young, and I don’t see him being a single dad given that he very actively goes out on jobs with his fellow Firelights, putting himself on the frontline, and is likely kept busy with the duties that come with being Ekko's second in command - that's the behaviour of someone set on securing a safer world for his family even if it costs his life, not someone who is solo parent of a baby who needs caring for around the clock. I believe he has a living partner (who is probably also Vastaya/has Vastayan heritage, given just how much his daughter takes after him)

For the sake of my portrayal, I'll be calling that partner Zihnah (or "Zee")

Headcanon #4: Scar, Eve and Ekko were the Founding Members of the Firelights

This really just comes down to my observation of how the three of them operated as a tightly knit unit during the hit on Silco's shipment, implying that they've been working together for a long time and interacting as equals. They were clearly the ringleaders of the operation, while the other four Firelights simply stood by, awaiting orders:

(Look at them. They look like they're about to drop their latest album I love them)

Eve also gets a place of honour up on the memorial wall, right with Vander, Benzo, Powder, Vi etc - her portrait is just as large and detailed as those core faces, which speaks volumes about how important she was to the Firelights (and to Ekko.) I 100% buy that she and Scar were two of the core Firelight members, who helped Ekko build the community into what we see in the show

This also explains why Scar is not just Ekko's second in command, but why they have a significantly stronger bond than just a superior and his lieutenant - why they can communicate so easily without words, why they look out for each other so closely, and why Ekko trusts Scar to set his leg without batting an eyelid (likely because they have patched each other up before and are comfortable being vulnerable around each other)

(I'll probably add more headcanons to this thread as I think of them, but these are the core ones I'm starting out with, to give some more depth + context to how I write the character.)

[starrymused]

// Please note that Viktor can be interacted with outside of an Arcane setting! He will still be a scientist who works on finding ways to better the lives of those who need help. I also don't know anything about League of Legends other than Viktor's game profile and the House on Emberflit Alley story! I would be interested in adding his game verse in the future (because I like it, too!) but I will be focusing on Arcane for now as that will be my main verse.

Viktor is an idealistic, altruistic, genius with a passion for science and its ability to improve lives for the better. Growing up in the slums of Zaun as a poor, sick, disabled boy; Viktor understood the suffering everyday people had to endure by living in Zaun's terrible conditions. Viktor wanted to leave behind a legacy where he could improve the people of Zaun's lives and do good for all; he found a worthy outlet of this dream by pledging his support to Jayce's dream of bringing Hextech to the masses. Viktor would sometimes quarrel with Jayce when he felt he was being led astray or distracted from their shared dream of using Hextech to help people.

Viktor believes that people are in desperate need of the good that Hextech can provide and wants to make it accessible as hasty as possible. This sometimes leads to quarrels with Jayce and Heimerdinger, who've sometimes withheld Hextech from the masses or halted its development until they could establish viable regulations for the new technology. Viktor is very bold in his pursuit of scientific discoveries and often is willing to do dangerous experimentation to figure it out or go against the ethos of the scientific community to accomplish his goals. To Viktor's credit, he has faith in himself and the genius to back it up. Part of the reason he is so hasty to usher in a Hextech revolution is because of his short lifespan, and his dread that he will be unable to accomplish the meaningful good that his goals aspire to before he expires.

As a child, Viktor's disability prevented him from joining in playing with other children, which made him a loner. As a student of the Piltover Academy, he was an outsider who relied on his genius and grit to make something of himself. He often defers to Jayce to act as their spokesperson for public speaking events while he supports him from behind the scenes. Due to Viktor's inability to be a public figure, Viktor is often overshadowed by Jayce as a founding father of Hextech. Viktor seems content to devote all his time on developing Hextech and sees its progress and the popularization of the science as the most important use of his and Jayce's time; with socializing and other extracurricular activities taking a backseat. Viktor sometimes becomes so immersed in his work that he becomes a reclusive workaholic.

During his time as a non-augmented person, Viktor was a white skinned, amber eyed, and brown haired human with a slim build. Since his birth he had a deformity preventing him to walk unaided, needing a cane to move (later a walking crutch.) During his time exposed to Zaunite pollution, it would greatly worsen his health conditions and reduce his lifespan.

When he started to dabble in self-augmenting Hextech experiments, Viktor would slowly start replacing his body parts. First, magically altered by the powers of the Hexcore with the aid of Shimmer (his right leg and hand specifically), he would eventually transition into mechanical augmentations, completely replacing most of his body parts.

--- Important Notice!

I see Viktor as being interested in men and having casual flings here and there during his time as a university student / Heimerdinger's assistant but nothing that ever became full relationships as he was always too focused on his studies and work. My fave ship for him is Jayce but I am open to plotting and interacting with others! If he has chemistry with other male characters — including ocs or muses from other fandoms — then we can let them develop!

[frasermints]

Hey! The vast majority of non voters are people who are in such maligned, marginalized circumstances that voting has never materially benefitted them ever, but you've never given a shit about their circumstances because you're in a position where voting DOES effect you, and THAT is your privilege!

You calling the poorest, most disabled, most violently oppressed people in the US "at fault" for the political crisis for not voting is actually you being a disgusting classist racist! And also politically illiterate in what a normal voter turnout is under democracy. Genuinely hope you learn to extend empathy to people who've never felt any ounce of political power in their life and RIGHTLY so not trust the system to advocate for them, you vile piece of shit 👍

hey, listen. i know you're angry and probably very very young and likely wouldn't be able to sniff out a case of "not for you, rabbit ears" if it were staring you in the face. but voting does actually materially benefit you, always.

i understand recency bias has influenced a good majority of y'all that have just become eligible or just started to pay attention to ampol in a serious way either since oct 7 or since mid 2023 when campaigning started up again. but it shows your lack of attention, insight, and political knowledge to say that voting does not benefit people that are marginalized. especially voting in us elections.

i am one of those people. i grew up on SNAP and WIC and independently still qualify for SNAP. the only reason i am not on SNAP is because i live with my mother and washington state considers me a dependent with combined income. i have been multiply disabled for my entire life and have more medical debt than you can fathom. i am not white. i am visibly transgender. all of these things impact my ability to vote in person. but you didn't consider any of these things before you sent this, did you?

i also should not have to qualify these things when i make the point to stir and promote political engagement. the only point where i politically have a leg up is that i vote absentee, because my state has mail in ballots by default, and it's somewhat easy to register in washington state. that's it. that's the only part of this where i have it easier.

we all benefit from political engagement. voting is the most crucial part of political engagement. protesting is useless when it is illegal. writing to your representatives is useless when your representatives are fascists. sending money overseas is useless when you are legally no longer allowed to have a job or a bank account. making ragebait posts on twitter and resharing infographics on your insta stories does fuckall when you live in a country ruled by an 80 year old nazi. but you, hiding behind those cute anonymous sunglasses enjoying your time on the internet like the nineteen year old jobless nobody like you are, don't understand that. because you're angry, and you're taking that anger out on someone that is also angry instead of directing it somewhere productive. and here i am doing the same because of it. but i'm also gonna give you some fucking information at the same time. because you wasted my morning sending this to me.

project 2025 is going to happen if we do not vote blue across the board and at that point you will literally not be allowed any form of political engagement. life will be worse for you than it already is now.

also, just because "normal" during a midterm means "less than during the primaries and generals", doesn't mean the turnout we have during the primaries and generals is something good or something to strive for. we need to be better than that if we actually want to move past the stale fucking 80 year old center right democrats we currently have speaking for us. we need to aim for 100% voter turnout. i will not settle for less.

there are also plenty of things elected democrats have done that have materially benefited us. plenty of things the Biden Administration has done! but again none of you fucks are paying attention!

inflation reduction act and medicare - access to prescriptions for disabled people, highlighting insulin caps and the ability to negotiate even lower. we are paying significantly less than we were before this legislation was signed.

bipartisan infrastructure law - specific provisions for women and minority owned businesses, public transport, fish and wildlife, indigenous land.

bipartisan safer communities act - gun control legislation, expanding access to telehealth under medicaid and CHIP, expanding the medicaid and CHIP networks, allows NICS to look into potentially disqualifying juvenile records and closes the "boyfriend loophole", provides multiple grants for multiple mental health services.

respect for marriage act - defines marriage as any valid legal union between two people and

DEA rescheduling of cannabis - oct 2022 biden asked the DEA to consider rescheduling cannabis. reschedulings are rarely denied - deschedulings are rarely approved. this will almost guaranteed happen.

electoral count act reform (2) - makes it exceedingly difficult for another january sixth to happen

local democrats also codified abortion access and protections in michigan, ohio, and washington. local republicans have been a nightmare for it in florida and arizona. dook at what julie mccluskie has done for colorado.

and again, with resources like how to vote in every state, the excuse of "i can't" is lazy as hell at this point. people can literally show up at your door and help you fill out an absentee ballot or get to a polling station to vote curbside, people are allowed at the voting booth to help you with a language barrier or processing issue if you need it.

but. like i said. continue to be angry. continue to rage in my inbox, behind your anonymous sunglasses. continue to be disengaged. and then be all fucking shocked pikachu face when trump and the like-minded GOP get voted in, and everyone in southwest asia gets bombed to shit, and every queer USian gets legislated out of existence, and every latino not born here gets deported. continue to make this a me issue, and not a disengaged voter bloc issue. because this is all about me, someone that has voted in every single election since august 2018, and totally not about the youth vote that has notoriously been disengaged and fucking useless in american politics. sure babe.

[lauvra]

Do art about it, I can't emphasize this enough. Sure you should go for a long walk, lift weights, read stories, watch films, absorb creative works, scream-sing in the shower, get laid etc etc and I'm the first to say I agree that so much of our creative work comes from downtime activities and experiencing being alive and forming a perspective but just make art with whatever you've got access to. Some of the most game changing performers had rough voices as instruments. Don't call it uppercase art if feels like extra pressure, call it expression, call it a mindless useless time widdling exercise in futility -- this is your right, call it play. Great creatives make art using anything around them even if it's recycled garbage. When I had no money during the pandemic I stole a pack of crayons and sketched sad people to project my pain in vivid colour upon a canvas -- I'm no genius but the genius or muse will appear when called upon. If you think you're not very creative, feel threatened by the blank page but still feel a restlessness within to express -- which you find is unsatisfied by the typical avenues, you're probably an artist who just isn't doing it due to unrealistic ideas of instant perfectionism that aren't fair on yourself nor are they fair on prolific creatives who've worked so hard to learn what they know. You don't need high quality paints in the beginning, or the finest mediums or whatever else professional artists use to ensure their works last generations -- knowing anything about anything will come as you feed the muse who'll hunger for her better expression while you gain confidence in your ability to play host but getting started is the most important thing. I'm speaking to myself here too, because often I see a painting I quite like cracking as it dries and think "oh, another failure" where really is an opportunity to understand why and do things differently next time. I don't have vivid imagery in my head, it's loud in there, I tend to draw from reference: a solution to this is creating collages or taking my own photographs to reference -- that in itself can be a collaborative, connective experience for the more social of us. Even the most isolated people are desperate to connect, we resonate with works that make us feel understood in some way, how ever abstractly. I don't know how people get through life without some form of a creative practise, we'd live in a better world if everybody found their thing so don't take external factors outside of your control and use them as an excuse not to engage with this side of yourself if you sense it's there waiting to develop. Someone I used to know tore a bed base apart in the throes of emotion and built a frame for his sold painting from its planks and the buyer never even knew the piece on display in their living room had more meaning and emotion behind it than was seen to the eye and this, this is what an artist does and this is why I love art and artists: when they're dealt a shit hand, they market it. Passion is contagious, elicits more emotion often in many viewers than observable technique, no matter how much people want to tear apart abstract expressionists -- they persist and capture imagination (and hearts). An artist must do the thing. Do it gladly, do it and suffer or just suffer instead. I'm gonna just post this without editing and I hope it's read by whoever is Not Doing the Thing today.

[ifuckingloveryoshu]

I have Lesbian Thoughts for Ryoshu againt beacase there's so many Contempt Awe Ryoshu arts. Her collar jutting out, I want to reach and pull it close. That slick back hair, the white part shirt thing. I like her white shirt. I don't want to touch her white shirt but its just such a nice look on her. She just pulls off the whole look. What else can I say. Her smile on the art too, she's so cool. I don't know what to do, I don't want to touch her body, I want to touch her clothes and just stare in her face with this specifc EGO. If I were able to cup her face in my hands, I would start crying for her even letting me do it. Its precious. But why is it doing this to me? Everything about how Ryoshu makes me feel is unnatual. I've never felt these things about any fictional characters I like. I only feel this intense about one other person in my life. Its tearing me apart. The rest, if not all this post is, I don't know how to word it, thinking about thinking about Ryoshu. Nothing of substance.

Having any intense emotion for me is unplesent. Adoration and Hatred bring about the same twangs of pain because it's difficult to deal with them. It shakes me to my core everytime I see her. But she's not real. I don't need her to be real, it's way better she's not real. I don't know. I had a post before, I privated it because I felt embarrased, I felt like I shared too much personal information on that one. Undoubtily, my infatuation with her has gotten me out of my shell, altered my thinking and my day to day habbits. Im still stunned that ironically the introverted loner character got me to be more social and my obsession with her and only her keeps me away from dangerous people. Its only been four months? She's sucessfully been a part of my life longer than my previous ex. And excerpt from that previous post.

"Yeah, I appreciate the people around me but I feel like I don't show it good enough, but if I went out there and showed it, I might get too clingy or overwelming, off. Or from my end, it's superficial. I know what its like to feel abandoned but I still do it even if I don't mean to. But I don't replace people, I still think about the people who've left my life. Having and expressing these thoughts in this way makes me warry because my previous ex was like this. Ive been speaking a lot recently about being honest and truthful and open, its not, Ive been more open then I have the rest of my days living, absolutely too open, its still terrifying. I swear I know about privacy and keeping myself safe, just please let me keep this. Its the inbetween of not being too annoying to directly message, and no ones obligated to respond, or to read, or to do anything. Its void. Burry. No ones telling me to post anything I just don't know at times. I hate my own words."

Limbus Company and my infatuation with Ryoshu helps me cope with my traumas. Huh, is it like the bar friends senario where everyone is reliant on that bar and their drinks, and were all addicts. Time is finite and everything is temporary. This too one day will enevitibly pass like everything else, and that's scary to me but it doesn't mean I'm not enjoying my time here now. She's just neat. My eyes are watering. I didn't think or say anything deep or complex. Ha. And all it took was for someone to post an image of her I had already seen onto another server. How dull I am. Ha.

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 11/09/2023

Stickerbrush State of Mind

Season 1 Featured on: GilvaSunner's Highest Quality Video Game Rips: Volume 7: Part mm2wood Also on: SiIvaGunner: Starter Kit & Essentials

Ripped by wheel able

I'm going to be as upfront as I can be in today's post. I'm European.

I really don't have a good enough image of the impact of the 9/11 attacks on America, how it affected everyone involved, how its continued to haunt the nation since. I had a hard time picking which rip would even be apt for a day like this one, if it'd be better to just skip it altogether. Althesame, 9/11 was a full-on tragedy, and making light of tragedies of any kind is always a very touchy subject - One SiIvaGunner unfortunately dabbled in during its first year active. In hindsight, its absolutely no wonder that the "9/11 event" on Season 1 of SiIvaGunner was met with such immense backlash as to be cancelled midway through. To date, its likely the most hostile the fanbase has ever been toward the channel and the people behind it. SiIvaGunner's early years, as lighthearted, joyous, and oft emotional as they oft were, are still coated with a thin film of edgy, insensitive and downright hostile flavor of comedy. I'm at least glad that 9/11 day was one project the team knew to denounce, and its alternatives for the Seasons that followed the first have all been filled with the kind of joy I always associated SiIva with.

There was a different kind of sadness that hung over Season 1's 9/11 day in the fallout, however - not every rip made during the event really had hostile or insensitive intent. After the event's official cancellation, the entire day's rips were deleted from the channel, catching a group of genuinely excellent rips in the crossfire. Of these, I'm sure there's none more iconic to the channel than Stickerbrush State of Mind. It took until Season 3 for it to get reuploaded to the YouTube channel, but its lived in the hearts of all SiIva album listeners since it was first saved through the Volume 7: Part mm2wood release in 2016.

Stickerbush Symphony (sorry - that's the official spelling!) is already one of the most hauntingly beautiful tracks within VGM, and both it and its remix in Super Smash Bros. Brawl have been community favorites since Season 1. Stickerbrush State of Mind follows a similar track to what I described in Noonsummer Madness - it mashes this laid-back, calming piece of music with a piece of hip-hop music that would otherwise not quite fit into the meme language SiIvaGunner otherwise speaks. Empire State of Mind by JAY-Z has only been featured on the channel two or three times since this rip debuted it - and both of those instances were almost definitely inspired by the impact this initial time had on the channel's audience.

I'm not American, I'm not an avid listener of hip-hop, and I wasn't even avidly listener to the SiIva albums until a good while into my time following the channel. But Stickerbrush State of Mind has always stuck with me as a kind of time capsule, a reminder of the old times, and an anthem known to us who've been here for so long. To quote a comment SSB_Seal left on the video's reupload five years ago - "I am elated that this rip is finally going to receive the recognition that it has deserved in my eyes for over a year and a half now." It's on Starter Kit & Essentials, it's been safe on the channel since Season 3, and its still a banger - Stickerbrush State of Mind, despite me having so little connection to its joke, the tragedy it was so unfortunately tied to, and the time in which it was first released and archived in, is an eternal vibe and an all-time favorite.

[with-the-flickers-of-light]

I've seen some discussion of "what would it take to make fans (the ones who've stopped listening to her music, etc.) feel comfortable with Taylor again after this?", and I just want to throw in my two cents.

(To be clear, before I say anything else, it's completely okay if it would take something different for you to feel comfortable, whether that's more or less. And it's also okay if you're still comfortable listening to her music, going to her concerts, etc. even if she never says anything.

And she's also not obligated to do any of this ever. This is only about sharing how I feel.)

First up: timelines.

I've seen the concerns some fans have had about her safety should she speak up, given the stalking/lurking/not sure what to call it behavior of people at Electric Lady. And while I feel like denouncing things like Ghetto Gaggers should not be so controversial as to cause a security concern, that's not my field and I don't live in the US, so it's not my say. (Seriously, what is happening over there? On that note, this blog believes in abortion, gender-affirming surgery, the existence of drag, etc.) And even if it's not a big risk, I can understand the anxiety it could cause.

Anyways, for that reason, I'll personally be okay with it if she gives an official statement on this at a later date, such as at the end of the Eras Tour, to minimize safety risks and anxiety. And I'm definitely ok with it if she never says anything live (i.e. onstage, etc.) because it's complicated and it can be hard to put shit into words.

In the short-term, though, I would still need to either stop seeing Healy onstage at the Eras Tour, or get an apology/explanation from Swift and/or Healy. Again, not my field, but I wouldn't imagine that Healy not performing onstage at a Swift concert would be controversial enough to create a security concern.

(I also know that he's going on tour with The 1975 soon, so I guess he wouldn't be showing up then either way.)

In the time after the tour, when Swift has no obligation to appear in public, if she's still platforming Healy without an explanation, my hope will probably be dead.

What constitutes an apology/explanation?

I've already said on this blog that I don't feel Healy's past apologies have been acceptable ones. They've focused on "I feel a bit bad", "if you've felt offended", "it was just a joke", "it was misconstrued", "don't think I'm an asshole", "I'm embarrassed", and other turns of phrase that don't take real accountability. So what would I accept as an apology?

I think that for Healy, if I ever want to feel comfortable listening to his music, I would need an apology to include acknowledging the harm he's caused, accepting accountability for that, and promising to educate himself and do better in the future. And while I don't need to hear apologies for every single incident, I would expect something more than just "sorry for everything" or "sorry for that one time". I don't need to see a monetary donation to the groups he's targeted or outspoken political advocacy, but they would be helpful in affirming that he truly wishes to do better.

In Swift's case, I'd want an affirmation that she supports all the marginalized groups that Healy has targeted, and an apology for acting in a way that made her concerts and community feel unsafe. I'm not asking for her to become an outspoken BLM activist or anything -- I know she's a singer, not an activist, no matter what Miss Americana said -- but I would like her to address the things she's tacitly supported. Like Healy, it's not necessary, but given her net worth, putting her money where her mouth is would also be nice.

So, in the end, what I need to feel comfortable with Swift is one of the following:

Healy apologizes. Swift explains that in knowing him personally, she felt that Healy was no longer the piece of shit he was at the time of his crappy behavior. Swift apologizes for failing to realize the impact his past behavior would have on fans.

Healy apologizes for his actions OR Swift separates from Healy. She acknowledges her privilege in failing to realize how harmful his behavior has been and apologizes.

In the absence of either, I will be finding other artists to listen to. (I mean, I'm already doing that? But I mean she'll be permanently off my playlists.)

[torirocksonhere]

walk-in review; An Cailín Ciúin | part one

DISCLAMER: i work in a large retail cinema here in ireland. part of my work is doing temperature checks inside of the screens, and whenever im assigned to that duty on my shift, i do just that every half hour (while sneaking in a minute or two of watching the movie). the first part of these reviews comes from whatever i happen to see when i walk into the screen every half hour.

i dont get to see a whole lot, thus this first review comes purely from ~5 minutes of watchtime in random intervals of the movie, and talking to people before and especially after the movie. as you can imagine, it isn't really comprehensive

however i dont watch trailers for movies, even ones that i already want to see, mostly because all of them edit together the best bits of the movie, leaving me disappointed at the shortcomings that they hid behind the big moments. so i count this first review as a sort of "trial-by-fire trailer" for said movie. essentially; "can a couple minutes of watchtime and word-of-mouth alone convince me to watch a movie?"

first i want to preface this with the best thing to come from this movie; the people who come to see it. to put it simply, most of them are quite old, and they are so adorably sweet it makes me so happy ! they always have something nice to say, they never spend too much, and theyre so chatty and lovely and i love old people and WILL DIE FOR THEM.

anyways, the actual movie.

An Cailín Ciúin, from what i can tell, is a movie about all the joys of growing up in rural ireland in ~early 1960s. including, but most certainly not limited to;

abusive and compliant parents

abhorrently obvious middle child syndrome

extensive breaks to your grandparents

cars driving on what can barely be considered as roads

in all seriousness though, this movie has everything to do with observation. (An Cailín Ciúin is irish gaelic for "the quiet girl" and oh boy is our main girl siobhan quiet ! ) our story follows siobhan, a young girl growing up in ireland. if im getting this right, then her parents had a child, needed a break away from minding all the kids at home so they could focus on just one, and in a standard Irish parenting move, sent one away to live with relatives for a while. siobhan is initially scared by the prospect, considering how shy she is, and how scared she is being in a completely new place (autistic coded characters??? in MY irish indie film?????), but she does agree to go, i believe in large part to her abusive father. really standard bad dad. y'know the type. "arent i allowed to have a drink after a long days work?" type beat. it helps the negative connotations that he's the only one who cant speak irish out of everyone in the house.

as an aside; i do believe the father is an allegory for ireland and the irish still feeling the effects of british rule, a time of history that has irreversibly destroyed our culture; a culture that this movie attempts to keep alive, and which it does beautifully. talking to the people who've seen it right after, they said how they felt taken back to a time that was much simpler, a time that was in many ways much better than present time. it's such a shame this movie is being written off by the larger public as "old people movie for old people only no younguns allowed", when in reality this film is trying to show everything that we as the Irish are best at, and where we as a culture shine, and how that's very very quickly being completely eroded to make way for the English way of life. if anything, this movie needs to be shown to the younger generations. it needs to be shown to people that have never experienced the feelings of community that came with being irish, and the incredibly beautiful language that gaeilge is. this movie is the perfect time capsule of Irish culture.

i frankly never got to see a lot of the middle of the movie, there was a plot of siobhan going to a funeral for the first time, and her struggling at school? but the middle of the movie is something i unfortunately have not caught a lot of, and understood less of.

the end of the movie is absolutely heart wrenching, even to me as someone who hasn't watched the entire thing start to finish. essentially, siobhan goes home, her trip is over. her, her siblings, her mother, and her grandparents are all in her house, talking and waiting for her father to get home. when they hear his car pull up, siobhan's mother gets very spooked, with a very worried look on her face. (look if it wasnt obvious at the start that the dad is abusive it really should be now). her grandad tries to reason with her mother, asking her to seek help, which of course the mother refuses. after all, it could take away her children, it could make him angry, it could do all host of things she doesn't want. its easier to just be complacent and suffer. one thing leads to another, and siobhan's grandparents leave. she, along with her mother and father, watch them leave. as soon as father is satisfied, he just heads back in, but mother talks to siobhan, asking her what happened while she was away. they share a stare with each other. mother's filled with dread and despair, and siobhan's with desire. then, siobhan runs down the road, attempting to catch up to her grandparents.

this... hurt to watch. how much she clearly loved and enjoyed life with her grandparents, and how much she hates life at her house, how she just wishes she could stay with them forever. however, as she embraces her grandfather, she sees him. father. she just repeats that, over and over. father. father. father. father. and then the movie ends. the pain in my heart from watching that ending was... unparalleled. it knew exactly how to tug at my heartstrings and did it so well and i hate it for that !!!! (i love it for that)

now that the stuff about the story is over, i wanna talk about close second for the best part of the movie; cinematography!!! and oh my GOD THE CINEMATOGRAPHY

first, most of the movie is shot lower than typical, which is done for two main reasons; to reflect both siobhan's physical and emotional height. obviously because she's a child, she sees the world shorter than most of us, but she's also really, really timid, and shooting low shots further strengthens that feeling of anxiousness that comes from a child, especially a child as quiet as siobhan.

second, the film is in 4:3, which i think is used as a passive reminder to the audience that the film is set in an earlier time frame, since most CRT televisions of the time period were in 4:3.

third, film grain. it isn't present in every shot, but the shots it is present in provide this super lovely and cutesy vintage feel to the movie, which just adds to how much i love the art direction of this film

fourth, focus. focus is barely used in this film, and when it is, it's usually in a shot that siobhan isn't the focus of, which i believe is used to remind us that siobhan is just a child, and children take in a lot more information than us. plus, it adds to one of this movie's greatest strengths; discover, don't show.

...and to be honest, thats all i have about the movie. essentially a girl just wanting to get away, but being scared to. i really like this movie, how it looks and how it sounds and how it feels. it makes me proud of being irish, it makes me want to preserve Irish culture. i love it and i will go and see it. i will either update this post or make a new post when i go to see it, to see if anything about my review changes, what i got right and wrong, and any more tidbits i have to add

(ignore the poll i can't get rid of it im sorry)