#people are so weird about writing as an art compared to other visual arts :/
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once i was in a creative writing class in college, and in a bit of humor i wrote the line:
"Um," I said, eloquently.
And my teacher was so adamant that I had to remove it because "um is not an eloquent word, so it makes no sense" and i was like my brother in christ it's called Irony
#she was so so adamant about it like.#ma'am.#specifically i did it that way because i wanted to express the fact that the character felt particularly foolish#like their brain being all like 'oh nice job what an eloquent way of putting it dumbass'#but without writing all that out ya know.#but no it was 'wrong' and it had to be removed :/#creative writing courses have never done a damn thing for me tbh#i know there has got to be a better way to teach it so that it doesn't quash someone's creativity#but i have yet to find one that does so#people are so weird about writing as an art compared to other visual arts :/#lulu talks
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Hey Devon. This is related to community-building ask, as I feel it kinda hit something in me, and that is my frustration with my local queer "main community", who is mostly made up of people who can work/hang together (people in visual and performative arts, LGBT NGOs, event organisers and so on). It's so closed off and so circlejerk-y that it's demoralising. I've been trying to fit in ever since I started being an adult, almost ten years ago, but I have never made any progress on getting to any of its members. I have made queer friends who are wonderful people, and as you said in the previous ask, that is enough and makes a community of our own already. Nevertheless, it is frustrating for all of us to go to a queer space/show/event just to see that the crowd there is made up of people who know each other and talk to each other and make big groups, while we're just sitting there. It brings us down to know that for queer political events like protests (which are ofc organised by them), we have no one left to fall back on except us. It makes it weird when only one of us is able to go protest, they'd rather not go because it feels so lonely to be sitting around all those people who just know each other, who have been passing by us for so many times over the years, and yet never take interest in even saying "hi" or whatever. It makes us think that they're fucking disingenuous and their "community building" is a load of crap. And I don't really want to feel like that about my people, but look at me, after almost ten years in my city, I fucking do.
Hi there, thanks for your message.
Let me just say that while I understand where the perception comes from, the queer people who put on shows, run nonprofits, and go out clubbing are not "The main lgbtq community" in your city. They're just a bunch of cliquish, careerist, young, privileged people who market themselves as such because they've been convinced that's what the "queer community" is and because doing so helps them get butts in seats at events.
I've seen theater kids, drag performers, DJs, comedians, party promoters, and other various people of the attention-seeking arts (said neutrally) do this all my fucking life. They stake a claim on building "feminist spaces" and "anti-racist" spaces, too, among other things, and use those higher values to sell tickets to their shit too. It's a way to make every tragedy that strikes oppressed people into an advertisement for their burlesques and shit. Don't let the self-important myopia get to you.
The real queer community? In any given city? Well, it's not any one thing. There is no singular "queer community". What people often refer to as the LGBTQ community or the queer community is a demographic, not an actual community. That demographic is marketed to, including by fellow queer people, but that does not a community make.
A community consists of people who know one another, and have enduring bonds, and who have shown up for one another mutually in multiple ways. A lot of these hot cool stylish young queer people are actually merely colleagues of one another. When there's a conflict, or a cancellation, or a venue that closes, they will be tossed to the wind like so many dandelion seeds. Compare that to you and your friends, who can and do remain in contact as the seasons of life change.
It is demoralizing to see so many people who talk a big game about community fail to show up to do activist work that is meaningful to you. I can't deny feeling the same way. For many years, I dated an actor who was very plugged into the local scene, and while his theater company had a reputation for being progressive, trans inclusive, even left-leaning, almost nobody in that collective did anything for the broader 'community' at all. They were all too busy being overworked five nights a week for like a $200 per week stipend, writing plays in which they repeated leftist platitudes but did relatively little.
I'm being a big overly cynical here -- the theater did just put on a big pro Palestinian fundraiser -- but the fact is that running a club, a theater, a local education org, or a regular drag show is a business, and in the end the business always comes first. Even when the members of that business might not want it to. They're often extremely exploited and underpaid, which is part of what makes them so hungry to market themselves and maintain their careers. I have sympathy for it. But meaningful social connections and local impact it does not make.
All of which is to say: please try to remember that these people presenting themselves as the symbols of the local "community" are just a bunch of artistic kids who are trying to make a living doing what they love. They're naive, exploited, a little self-absorbed yes, but they're ultimately not that important. they just deal in a very self-important line of work.
There are SO many queer people all around you who never go to those fucking clubs and shows and aren't even on instagram. The "main" queer community, demographically, is more like the nerdy 40 year old gay couple that lives down the street from you who goes out to the movies once or twice a month and holds board game nights with their friends. The "main" queer community is volunteering at the zoo, going camping with their fraternity brothers that they met 20 years ago, working at the car dealership, planting tomatoes at the local community garden, taking care of elders with dementia, organizing weekly running groups.
You can find people like this -- total normies -- who will care about causes greater than themselves and want to contribute to community building efforts. Many of those people are already doing a ton to make community. It's just less sexy and less self-consciously queer than like, the dance parties. It's also more diverse, accessible, and capable of meeting people where they are at.
It does sound like you would like to meet more activist friends / politically engaged friends, and for that I'd say try looking at pro-Palestinian (for example) events and spaces and seeing who turns up there, checking out a local food not bombs chapter, looking up local mutual aid groups or buy nothing groups, getting involved in hyper-local initiatives, and putting what feelers you can on local forums and personals boards (like Lex, local Facebook groups, local Meetup groups, etc). You probably wont find a perfect space, but you will find worthwhile people scattered everywhere you look!
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I love your art! It’s so nice seeing trans art by a trans person about happy trans people :))))
Any tips for a beginner artist? What to draw, how to stay motivated, etc.
Thanks! I hope you have a wonderful day.
Thank you so much!! w I wouldn't know what to say, the usual "keep practicing" doesn't look like much of a help x) but sadly, is the only thing that will make you better as an artist. I always say that a good sign is that, a while after you've finished a drawing, you start finding imperfections, mistakes, and things that can be improved. Don't be obsessive, and be aware that your drawings won't be perfect, don't think that it means you're useless or anything, is part of the process. Don't hate what you do if it doesn't look as nice as you'd like, that won't get you anywhere, but is fine if you don't like old drawings after a while. That's a sign that you're growing and getting better. You're now able to identify what you can do better, I would worry if after years you still think your drawings are perfect, that means you're stuck there. However, when you become aware of one of those things that can be improved (for example, you realize that in a previous drawing, hands looked weird), try to do it better next time. Don't say "I can't draw hands", just try it x) And you won't suddenly make them perfect, but now you know what you have to work on.
Use references, DON'T copy or trace, but as a visual artist, you have to be very *visual*, so, look at the way others have made their own art, and see what you like about different styles. Search for pictures of people doing activities you want to draw, doing different poses, etc., Is like writing or composing music, you need to read or listen, even if you will create something new, it's great to have references and guides. As for motivation, that's more difficult ^^ It is completely different for each. For me, the motivation at first was creating characters I could surround myself with when I was feeling awfully lonely and depressed, you know, to give them their own lives to get myself distracted from my own. Now my motivation comes more from knowing other people have found themselves in my characters and stories, and that somehow what I create has helped them, even if just a few, even if just a little. I like to compare my old drawings with the newer ones, just to see how much progress I've made x) This is my first digital drawing from 2012, versus one from 2024 (Some people improve a lot faster, I just took a lot of time because the first years I didn't draw as much, in 2018 I only made 3 drawings)
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Was that art of 'Blood and Gold' with little Tom AI-generated? 🥺
What are your views on AI, Pen?
ugh yes it was. Someone messaged me about it, I had only looked at it quickly on my phone and didn’t realize. I apologize for sharing that. Short answer: extremely against AI in all forms when it comes to art and writing; possibly against it everywhere.
Long answer: I’m sure my view is shared with most people here, but I am not a fan of AI anywhere, for any reason. I may be able to be swayed in certain areas, but where artwork is concerned, I only see it as a huge NO. Even if it were based on artwork from all consenting artists, I’m against it. Ruins the purpose of art imo. It’s not just horrible for artists and the potential growth of most people, not to mention it’s often super weird and inaccurate (for now), but the environment. No thanks.
As it is now, obviously, artists aren’t consenting, they’re being robbed - and I so get it! A lot of people here may not know but I’m a visual artist, even though I’ve put that major major part of my life on hold for now. I know exactly how much work goes into making a huge, intricate drawing or sculpture or video. To see other people posting similar things where they didn’t go through ANY of the (very meaningful, very pivotal) stages of growth to achieve something similar because of the work other artists have done is, in a word, Bad.
This goes for writing too ofc - I’ve had more than a couple people, anonymous and not, tell me that there’s this other tomione work out there that looks like it was written using AI, and that it looks a lot like B&G is in there. Idk if that’s true or not but getting sent screenshots and messages about it and the conversations people have had around it is really frustrating! Mainly because I don’t want to hear about this fic! I don’t want my story being compared to it whether it’s AI or not, but knowing that it might be does feel like salt in the wound. But whatever, I don’t think there’s a way to prove that and even if there was it doesn’t really matter. I’m only mentioning all that here just to say I GET it, I’m sorry I shared that work without examining it more closely, and if you’re going to make works using AI (you shouldn’t), TAG IT.
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ok i've decided i want to infodump about vee and nova a little after all! because uhh not only am i impatient because autism but i also. want to dip my toes into talking about this. just days ago i was still terrified but now i am Tentatively Brave... if i can talk about it here casually like this then i should be able to write a more formal summary later some other time
i've tagged this post appropriately (at least i think i have, feel free to suggest if i should add more) but also a heads up here too before i keep talking that while i'm not going into graphic detail on anything there are STRONG themes of organized sexual abuse of a child, sexual abuse of animals, and grooming! (there are no disturbing visuals in this post, just text)
IF YOU CAN'T READ THIS POST THAT'S OKAY I STILL LOVE U
takes a deep breath alright so the deal with these two. back all the way in 2021, i decided i wanted to make "vent ocs" as in i just wanted some concrete/consistent designs i could use in vent art drawings that weren't a direct reflection of what i envision myself to look like or whatever. i was going through a lot in 2021, in december 2020 i had just gotten my first big repressed memory back and my life was in a whirlwind of change and heavily increased PTSD and DID symptoms, so i was using art a lot as an outlet. in the end i settled on this drawing, based on the design taste i would have had as a young person (god the quality is so old now LOL i've improved a lot but anyway)
i was intending for these two to be just visual designs and nothing more than that but i got attached and actually ended up giving them a whole storyline and everything, which is something i admittedly hadn't done in a long time up to that point so that's cool.
the reason i preface explaining the premise of the storyline with this is because i think it's important to acknowledge that these two are intrinsically tied with my real life and the feelings i experience as a CSA/OA survivor. not because i think someone has to go through awful things to write or draw about them necessarily, but because i am passionate about expressing myself. it's important for me to be seen in some way, to be heard after years of silence. it is not safe for me mentally to share the exact details of my abuse online rn (and please don't ask for them!) but i also don't want these two to be removed from the message that i survived something and this is me making art about that in an abstracted and magical way with a fictional universe that brings me a lot of comfort. i hope this makes sense lol
oh and also with that in mind if you think for even a second any of this is a weird sex thing for me or some shit please stop reading this post and go do something else with your time. this is my trauma expression and i don't need to be compared to the people i was abused by when i was a literal toddler thank you!
AANYWAY so! premise! gonna be point blank with it! vee (not her original name but shh) is born as a normal 100% human girl, aka without the eevee ears and tail. she is groomed from a very young age (like, toddler age) and eventually abducted by her groomers which happen to be members of... well right now it's team rocket because i haven't spent the time to worldbuild a new villainous pokemon organization yet. roll with me here. she is taken to a remote facility out in the middle of fucking nowhere and is never returned to her previous life or family.
Why? well i'm glad you asked! the org is running a bunch of different experiments in this facility and one of them happens to be trying to enable humans reproducing with pokemon. this doubles as both a money thing and a power thing. they seek out a child as the victim of these horrible experiments because children are easily malleable. way easier to control a child than an adult who already has a firm identity/self.
vee is the child they chose. surgery is forcibly done on her to give her working eevee ears and tail, and also like, fuck with her body chemistry and stuff. she's biologically part eevee now. yes this is bullshit pokemon magic science LMAO but she is kept in this facility and chronically sexually abused for a few years by pairing her with various mons and trying to get eggs to happen.
the experiment isn't working though so they hypothesize that giving her a dedicated partner, especially of the same evolutionary line, would help, and they raise nova from birth as an eevee to take on that role. eventually the two of them are paired together. despite the acts they are forced to commit on each other and the abuse they endure, they actually become inseparable very quickly cause like. they don't have anyone else. and also they just genuinely care about each other. additionally at this point nova has evolved into an espeon and has telepathic powers, so him and vee can communicate linguistically with each other, so you know that helps
generally my current focus of this story is in the early years, when vee is 12 and younger, before they start realizing that shit is fucked up and they need to escape (up until that hypothetical point they have been successfully groomed into believing everything happening to them was not abuse/was normal). i have left out a metric fuckton of detail here just to get across the basic premise. i am constantly exploring vee's psyche, nova's psyche, it's like an in depth exploration of the mind of an abused child in horrific circumstances and god it's cathartic. i love these two so fucking much
btw i guess this art has more context now huh haha after i infodumped off the plot to my sister they looked at this art again and was like. OHHH THIS IS EVEN MORE OMINOUS AND HARD TO LOOK AT WITH CONTEXT. AND I WAS LIKE YEAH!!!! YOU SEE THE VISION!!! THE SYMBOLISM!! ETC!!!!
uh yeah if you read this far thank you and i just wanna say i've been building up the courage to talk about these two for GENUINELY two years, it has been over 2 full years since that initial drawing, and i am nervous and jittery posting this but i do not want to die without having shared my work with the world and i'm willing to take the risks to get my voice out there. so you reading it is very much appreciated ur like my first step into being more confident as a survivor lol
oh and fwiw despite these guys being so correlated with my trauma it's not offensive to make headcanons or ask me questions about them or compliment darker art of them however you want, in fact i love that shit!! please i've been holding these guys back for two years i have so much to say that hasn't been said. as much as i am nervous i am EXCITED
#sa tw#mind control tw#csa tw#oa tw#abuse tw#this post is a bit of a mess sorry!#this is why im sort of “drafting” my summary as a stream of consciousness infodump#i need to tackle having the confidence talking about this first#just get it out no matter how messy#and THEN i can clean it up and present it in an artistically pleasing way#kiki was here#kiki.txt#vee & nova
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hi, i've been following you since 2019 when the first Joker movie came out and being able to analyze Arthur, write about him and read what other people write about him (especially your writings in particular) has been a very rewarding experience. i don't think i've ever immersed myself in fandom like that before. so thank you so so much for dissecting every little bit of Arthur and for making me consider things i'd never considered about a character (and real life people in general) before ♥️
anyways, my question is: how did you cope with Arthur's canon death? i know characters live forever, in a certain way but seeing him dead in canon felt so melancholic. he really felt like an old friend to me, as weird as that sounds. thank you for answering and thank you for sharing your art and your thoughts with us for the past 5 years
Thank you so much! I am pleased to know you've enjoyed yourself with Arthur… That what I make inspired further engagement is wonderful. Fandom is an interesting creative space. We are all rubbing against one another's preferences and interpretations and this can be seen as either a benefit or a downside. I really enjoy being made to see a character in a light that is outside my scope or personal interpretation, even if I disagree with it, and I am happy knowing that others are out there who are also drawn to new or different perspectives. Vacuuming up a large collection of character interpretations feels beneficial… it feels additive.
As for the meat of your question:
Learning that Arthur dies convinced me to see the film. I had no intention of seeing it until reading a synopsis.
I personally like stories where main characters die, especially when that death is narratively, emotionally, or visually satisfying. Arthur dying was pushed toward and hinted at in the first film (it could be said that he metaphorically died before his physical transformation into Joker) and the story consistently argues that Arthur is incapable of surviving within a society that is hostile toward him. The sequel takes this idea further by being creatively antagonistic, attacking Arthur physically and mentally in precisely targeted ways. He gets everything he wants but everything he wants torments him until, ultimately, he resigns himself to being himself. The worst fate of all; it represents a relinquishment of hope for something better.
The way it is shot is sadistic compared to the more sympathetic framing of the first, we aren't given much opportunity to be in Arthur's shoes, we're positioned as bystanders or even as participants in his abuse. This is most obvious when contrasting the subway car attack to the prison rape (these are twin scenes: Arthur is stripped of an identity and assaulted). And, importantly, Arthur does not fight back. Arthur accepts absolutely everything that is done to him very passively as if he deserves it, including his own death.
I loved the ending. The mystery visitor suggesting new connections that are immediately made irrelevant. The prolonged, silent, struggling bleeding out. I've always felt that Joker should have ended in graphic public suicide, but that couldn't happen because the film is weighed down by its primary narrative intention being an origin story. I'm happy they found a way around that. For me, part of loving Arthur also involves the undiluted themes and arc of his story, so the missing piece that was his (suggested) death felt like I was being denied something important. But now he is actually dead… what is there to hope for next?
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I have seen maybe half a season of TUA and didn’t read the comics so let me tell you seeing those panels where Vanya is yelling “We belong on that stage” (and in reference to herself and her taller blonde bass-playing brother) drawn in profile with literally Gerard’s haircut and outfit was a big shock to the system. I never even considered that he’d inserted elements of himself and his bandmates into TUA except for a bunch of weird edits people made comparing how much Aiden Gallagher looks like Frank but now I feel like I really need to read it.
im really looking forward to rereading all of the comics after this semester's over because i haven't done that since volume 3's run ended and i'll definitely make more coherent posts about it then but like. it's really really interesting to compare to all of gerard's other art because he is just...so distinctively him, even across different mediums and genres. tua and mcr and hesitant alien and kjna and his visual art etc etc etc like his artistic fingerprint is stamped so boldly and unapologetically all over them and that's something i really love about him. like his art, love it or hate it, is sooooo genuine always. even when he's purposely imitating other artists, he's very consciously doing it in his own voice, putting his own spin on it.
when i say tua and mcr are completely separate projects i mean it - i don't think one should only ever be discussed in relation to/in the context of the other - and, above all, tua is certainly not like...autobiographical, or a direct representation of real people/events. it's led by gerard but it has a different creative team than mcr does and that really shows as well - i definitely wanna talk ant this when i have more time but part of the reason im not sold on conweap as an album is because it's too umbrella academy - it's really evident that gerard was working on both of them at the same time, and letting one influence the other too directly. mcr's a band, not a Gerard Project, and umbrella academy is largely a duo (w gabriel bá), so they can't just be transplanted onto each other yk.
anyway I'm rambling but all this to say - tua isn't meant to be "about" mcr any more than bullets is "about" 9/11. but gerard's life was changed and shaped by his experiences in the music scene throughout his life, by dropping everything and living as a penniless artist, by becoming suddenly (in)famous, and that really shines through in tua. he says he drew inspiration from touring band life to write a dysfunctional family, and the dehumanising effects of fame and attention, and of being categorised and scrutinised on a private or public level, are huge themes - as is addiction, mental health, complicated grief.
like...i actually got into mcr through the tua comics lmaooo. i read volume 1 because of wonderful @blackmoldmp3 talking about it and immediately said oh. i need more from this dude's brain right now. and i was soooo not disappointed haha. i really am obsessed with quite a lot of the things gerard is also obsessed with as an artist. the particular themes and imagery and scenarios he's fixated on are really very consistent throughout everything he does - only the way they're discussed or portrayed does change over time. i don't rly subscribe to the idea of gleaning specifics abt artists' personal lives from their works because, beside all else, it just does them a huge disservice (that's my number one gripe with the popular talking pounts around hes alien and frank's solo work in particular; however "confessional" you wanna read art as, it's still art that was created with skill and intent.)
anyway that's way off topic dkfnfj. what i do love about this kind of thing is looking at distinct creations in the context of the rest of an artist's body of work. like...yeah, gerard's said there's a lot of mikey in klaus. has dressed similarly to vanya and the kraken and the seance at times etc etc. has compared himself to the rumor, because she's the one he relates to most. puts a lot of his familiar ideology surrounding music and performance into vanya. puts angry teenage vanya in a shitty punk band with her disillusioned teenage brother on bass, and puts a classical music prodigy in a punk band as an excellent guitarist, writing songs about killing the president etc etc. i could go on! because these things are just scattered everywhere through the comic, just like all of gerard thematic and aesthetic and ideologic fingerprints.
so what's reallyyy interesting to me is looking at umbrella academy as something gerard wrote on the road with mcr across multiple years. volume one was released while the tbp world tour was ongoing, and volume two only a few months after. the progression of parade -> tua -> conweap -> danger days is SOOOO fascinating to me, especially because one of the things that really works about danger days imo is the way it kind of shakes off some of the tua-style gritty cynicism and returns to mcr's defiant, extravagant theatricality. if you go through tua with a fine-tooth comb you'll definitely find the most direct comparisons to conweap, in terms of mcr. the way dd approaches the themes it has in common with tua is just.....so different, and so so mcr. and then you can see the at times self-referential development on those things in hesitant alien - AND THEN VOLUME 3 COMES AROUND AND LIKE. AUUUGGGGHHHHH the change and growth there is SO apparent. btw i don't mean "growth" "progression" etc in this post to mean "improving" - i just mean change and development in a neutral sense, bc it's so interesting to see it laid out there in an artist's body of work. but like. man it makes me crazeeee actually the way gerard picked tua back up....almost certainly around the same time mcr started discussing a potential reunion. and the way that foundations revisits and reconceptualises mcr's existing catalogue is paralleled in the way vol 3 of tua is, like...........like there's so much life lived there, between those things. gerard's even said he's changed his plan for the ending (if we ever see it 🥲) because he has more compassion for his own characters now and doesn't want to see them broken down for good. he says he's gotten better at listening to other people - for starters, he's a lot more conscious of his own subconscious racism/whiteness that came through at times in the original run and has expressed regret for that (namely, the entire main cast being white, with a couple of side characters being uncomfortably stereotyped).
but just like. augh. im not gonna lie man i have no idea what i've just typed im sorry it's probably so rambly bc I'm so dizzy rn and definitely am not gonna proofread it or whatever skdjfj but. I LOVE ART! I LOVE ARTISTS! I LOVE DIVING DEEP INTO AN ARTIST'S BODY OF WORK AND WATCHING THEM REINVENT THEMSELF AND/OR DOUBLE DOWN ON THEMSELF (SOMETIMES FOR BETTER, SOMETIMES FOR WORSE). obvs this fandom genuinely does have a big issue with invasive/un-self-aware parasocial behaviour but there's a difference between that and like. getting obsessed with a particular artist. that's so normal and in fact necessary to life imo. i think every artist literally has to have ppl like that i can't imagine any other way to live it's just a specific type of human connection at a distance baby. don't get me wrong tho i also wanna chew on his thigh. anyway.
my god. how did i get here what even was your question. tua. yes it's crazy. it's not for everyone for sure but it has enough of the shit that makes me crazzzzyyyyy that it got me into mcr which made me crazierrrr so. yes i can recommend. especially if ur like me and lovvvve stories that are a little bit fractured by design. that dance around big parts of the story, where there's as much significance in an absence or in a tiny background detail than there is in any dialogue or action scene. most of the criticism i see of tua is about the pacing but like. to my tastes it's a really great use of the comic medium yk? lmk if you want content warnings or something there are plenty skdjfj.
#how was i completely braindead today and then too dizzy to read text. and then somehow type this shit on my phone with my eyes half-closed.#am i literally just lazy or is a hyperfixation strong enough to kvercome any illness lolz#sorry if this went in a billion circles but the room im in is also spinning a little so. skfndkfndjdjfjdj#umbrella academy#tua#mcr talk#*#answered
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hey girl write down your top 7 (this is nice number😋) of js's fav photo shoots, images
THIS IS SUCH A GREAT QUESTION AND 7 IS INDEED A VERY NICE NUMBER BUT IN THIS PARTICULAR CASE IT MIGHT BE A WAY TOO SMALL ONE LIKE HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO PICK ONLY 7 PICTURES FROM JIMMYSEA PHOTOSHOOTS WHEN WE GOT SO MANY JUST THESE PAST COUPLE OF MONTHS ✋😭
i mean of course im still gonna try to do it, but know im throwing up all the blood in my body every step of the way and that if you ask me this question again in a couple of weeks the answer might be different ;;;;;;;
ANYWAY HERE GOES NOTHING!!!!!!!!
1. the chemistry in front of this fish tank is astronomical from LEMON Magazine. sorry idk what else to say except that they're literally just looking at each other and yet every time i so much as barely glance at it i still find myself in a dead faint in front of my screen drowning in the sheer incomprehensible levels of magnetism electricity tension vibes oozing from this one (1) single still image. like i know maybe it's weird to put it in first place since it only has their faces and nothing else but it really makes feel in dire need of a mental health crisis intervention team THIS IS WHAT THE WALLS OF MY PADDED ROOM LOOK LIKE
2. forehead touch from Starry Magazine. WHAT CAN I SAY IM NOT IMMUNE TO FOREHEAD TOUCHES. they're giving such effervescent 'we are so deeply intertwined and enthralled by each other that everything else just falls away' vibes that i can even look past the school boys attire this picture is just THAT beautiful. also the tenderness!!!!!!!! the sunflower!!!!!!!! I AM BUT A WEAK WOMAN
3. cuntitude Xtreme100 from ViVi men. invented maximizing their joint slay and serving so much coquettecore cuntism it makes me act deeply unwise. idek what's the worst (read: best) part of it all if jimmy's bold jewelries or sea's outfit that exposes the mole on his chest for the world to see or how fluffy their hair look or the way jimmy is resting his arms on sea's shoulder while sea's head is turned just enough to brush against jimmy's all i know is that whoever styled them for this shoot deserves a raise and a kiss on the mouth.
4. interconnectedness from PRAEW Magazine. look me in the eyes and tell me this doesn't belong in the louvre with a little tag on display under it that shows this exact title like with all due respect to my man leonardo but the mona lisa ain't shit compared to this picture. it should be studied in art classes all around the world for its lines and composition and contemporary figuration and how the intertwinement of the bodies is a metaphor for the mingling of souls throughout lifetimes. OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
5. whole face economy in one image from Mint Magazine. never in the history of the whole entire world have two people looked more stunning like the visual excellence displayed here never fails to propel me into an entire different reality. the other reason i love this one so much is that this is their usual pose but for once sea is the one holding jimmy and that truly makes me feel some type of way, the photographer really was on some galaxy brain shit for this one.
6. sea's oral fixation from ViVi men. at first i didn't want to put two pictures from the same shoot on the list just to give more variety but im currently too rabid about this one to leave it out. im not sure what compelled sea to put one of the strings from jimmy's hoodie in his mouth but that sure was. A CHOICE. i also love jimmy's smile and the more casual clothes and sea's silly goose vibes and how warm and huggable and comfort shaped they look.
7. high fantasy concept from LEMON Magazine. once again i didn't want to put two pictures from the same shoot but i think this ones deserves a place on here even just for how original it is like THE VISION THE TASTE THE FLAVOUR THE STYLE THE INSPIRATION THE QUALITY THE VIBES CHINESE MAGAZINES TRULY ARE ON SUCH A COMPLETE DIFFERENT LEVEL OF CREATIVITY GMMTV WISHES IT COULD COME UP WITH SUCH INCREDIBLE OUT OF THIS WORLD IDEAS.
#CLAWING MY FACE OFF BECAUSE I HAD TO LEAVE OUT MY OTHER FAVORITE FROM STARRY MAG AND THE ONE FROM ELLE THAT I ADORE#BUT AT LEAST I DID IT I GUESS#[THROWS UP BLOOD AND DIES]#ANYWAY. this was incredibly hard but also so much fun so thank you for asking anon!!!!!!!#also sorry for the small text but i wanted to save some space ;;;;;;#hope you're having a wonderful day!!!!! 💜💜💜#jimmy jitaraphol#sea tawinan#jimmysea#m: ask
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I was just wondering, are there any particularly good Elseworlds or AU stories that involve Two-Face/Harvey in them? Are there any in particular that you'd recommend actually picking up and reading? (I've been thinking about actually reading Masque and Two Faces lately, but was wondering if there were any others worth checking out!)
Ah, Elseworlds,: DC’s venerable AU imprint. As is the case everywhere else, these were a mixed bag of good, bad, weird, and forgettable, and Harvey’s appearances in them was no exception. The two you cited are perfect examples (in addition to being his two most prominent Elseworlds stories):
Two Faces is, pound for pound, the very best Harvey Elseworlds story. Not surprising, since it comes from one of the greatest comic-writing teams ever, Abnett & Lanning! Bruce is a Jekyll figure who “Hydes” himself in the name of finding a chemical cure for Harvey, who has become an airship-flying, bowler-hatted Two-Face.
It’s great, and the conclusion has long been one of my favorite looks at their friendship and the lengths they’ll go for one another. How I wish we’d gotten a sequel with that particular Batman. In terms of Victorian Batman stories, I vastly prefer this to “Gotham By Gaslight,”which I’ve always felt has been rather overrated.
Masque, by contrast, is not very good but still worth reading. I think of Mike Grell as an artist who sometimes writes, and this is very much an artist’s story, using both Bruce and Harvey as Phantom figures with the opera swiped out for ballet, presumably for the purposes of comics being a visual reading medium.
But as both a story and a Phantom tribute, it’s rather thin, with little to say. Still, it has Harvey as a flamboyant, romantic, murderous ballet danseur, so that’s worth checking out on its own.
Beyond those two, there are a few other Elseworlds worth tracking down. The first is in the vein of Masque, in that it’s a thin take on Harvey that entirely coasts on his concept and physical appearance.
In this take on The Scarlet Pimpernel, Harvey is the French Revolutionary Hervé Deinte, who clashes with the mysterious Bat-Man seeking to fight against Robespierre.
Mike W Barr has never been a good writer of Two-Face, but Jose-Luis Garcia-Lopez’ incredible art more than makes this worth reading, especially for the unusually dashing and dangerous take on Diente.
The next recommendations are a pair of noirish tales that came out around the same time. The more famous of these is Nine Lives, which was published sideways to presumably replicate letterbox cinema format.
Harvey in this story is Bruce’s friend and lawyer, but get this: he’s two-faced! In that he sells out Bruce to try getting rich with the Joker stand-in. Plus he uses his coin to con people, not a fan of that.
Still, his face-turn (pun not intended) at the end to save Bruce helps redeem these flaws, and the story is pretty solid noir all around, albeit a bit dry for my tastes.
I strongly prefer the other noir Elseworlds, Gotham Noir, by the impeccable team of Brubaker and Phillips. It’s more hard-boiled (more like pulp compared to Nine Lives' literary noir), and not afraid to be a bit more outlandish, and I love Harvey’s role here as the DA, which is more in line with his role in Year One. Brubaker also gets to play with a concept he introduced elsewhere, that Batman is credited as a myth that Dent cooked up to scare criminals.
Next up are two Lovecraftian takes on Batman with prominent Harvey roles. The first and far more famous is Mike Mignola’s The Doom That Came To Gotham, which somehow manages to make Harvey suffer even more than usual.
It’s a rare take on a Harvey Dent who is purely good and purely a victim, where even his transformation into a Two-Face of sorts is just… sad. It’s great!
“The Crawling Hand,” however, is far more obscure and for good reason: it was included in the infamous Elseworlds 80-Page Giant which was initially scrapped and pulped before release because of Kyle Baker’s story about Superman’s babysitter. As a result, this story is still a little-known curiosity with Bruce and Harvey trying to survive eldritch takes on DC’s stretchy characters, with Harvey ending up as a surviving casualty lost to madness. Fun!
Finally, the last Elseworlds I’d recommend is one that has no reason to be an Elseworlds at all: the Daredevil/Batman crossover. Seriously, why the hell was this an Elseworlds? No one dies, there’s nothing to indicate an alternate setting… literally the only reason I can even imagine why DC slapped on the AU label—seemingly at the last second!—is because they didn’t want it canon that Harvey and Matt Murdock were rival-friends back in college!
Granted, it IS a bit weird to have a story with Matt being the one who believe in Harvey Dent while Batman is a hardline jerkass who hates Harvey, but that was hardly out of place in this era of Bruce being a grim prick. I’m baffled as to why it’s an Elseworlds at all, but hey, it technically counts! Definitely worth checking out either way!
All in all, a mixed bag of good and interesting. Seeing these again makes me long to see the Elseworlds imprint revived, especially now that we're getting new Elseworlds projects in film and TV thanks to James Gunn. Maybe we'll finally see some cool, interesting new takes on Two-Face in the near future!
#apologies for any typos or errors this was a nightmare to compile#neither the app nor desktop tumblr liked me making this post for some reason
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Writer Q&A Tag Game
Hello. I got tagged for this by @squarebracket-trick on this post and I thought it sounded super fun. So, here we are!
1. What motivates you to write?
I started out as an artist, but I began writing once I realized that visual art as a medium wasn't enough to tell the stories I wanted to tell - it had no way of codifying lore, defining character traits, or even just easily telling a long story. I think it's still largely that, in a way. I come up with all these stories and I "get them out" through writing because I sure as hell can't keep them inside my brain for eternity.
2. A line/short snippet of your writing that you are most proud/happy of. If not maybe share a line of someone else's work you love (just please credit them)
This one is pretty recent, from a few chapters ago in DoS, but I'm really proud of it. I just feel like it emphasizes how much Seth's experience with souls connects with the body, which is the Goddess of Time's domain. A lot of metaphors in this story centre around bodies and physicality because of this. Here's the snippet:
And yet, there was Theo, with her soul so unwound there was no fixing it anymore. The most she could do was keep healing and healing, covering the cracks of the bowl with her own hands in the hope that they'd go back to normal. Keep filling the ocean so that, no matter how many holes lined its bed, it would never be empty. [...] She held her so tight she thought her hands would fuse to her skin. As if she could cover the cracks of her soul with her own body.
Idk, I just vibe with it.
5. What part of writing do you think you are the best at? (Yes stroke your own ego it's okay)
(what happened to 3 and 4? where did they go?)
I'd say back-and-forth banter, probably because of my time in theatre, but also horror description. It creeps up on me. I keep writing horror on accident. And I always really like it. Just something about describing something weird and spooky.
6. What do you enjoy most about the Writeblr community?
Mostly the fact that there's all these other writers who have cool stuff and also wanna see my cool stuff. I already loved writing on my own, but knowing that there are people Out There who also care about my stories just feels amazing.
And also, the casual friendship between people. You interact with someone's blog, they interact with yours, and you suddenly feel like you're friends, kinda. I can only compare it to making quick friends with someone on the playground as a kid. I like it <3
7. A writing tool/device you use that helps you with writing? (It could be speech-to-text, a writing program etc)
I am a very ✨analogue✨ person, so my best writing advice in this scenario is always: put that shit on paper.
Feel unsure about a scene? Put that shit on paper. It's like a 0.5th (hehe "halfth") draft that you will copy onto your document and you will always improve it with that second look.
Worried about perfectionism? Put that shit on paper. Even pencil, at least to me, feels hard to erase. It's mostly about living with the stuff you've written and not looking back - erasing is such a pain in the ass that you might as well just keep going forward.
Wanna write secretly during class/lectures/whatever where you're not allowed to have a device? Wadda ya know, the answer is also paper.
Wanna edit? Printing stuff out helps you get some distance from your own writing and it also makes you see it more as a book than as just something you've made.
It also generally makes you feel less bad about changing stuff later in the document, because you have a solid, physical record of what you've written before.
Put that shit on paper. It works well.
(sorry for the rant sbdhagjk)
8. A piece of worldbuilding that you like in your own story? (It could be the magic system, a particular place in the story, a law etc)
I once made a post about the art movements in the world of the dystopia WIP (yes, seriously) but I can't find it anymore. I'm not gonna explain it again, it was stupidly long the first time around.
I guess, outside the dystopia WIP, I'm pretty proud of the whole Three Sister Goddesses thing from DoS. I have drawn designs, but I'll make another post sometime. I'm also proud of the relationship between the Goddesses tho.
They're at war with each other, but they're just doing it for entertainment. They kiiiinda hate each other but not as much as their desire to have fun. Like, they will send their daughters to decimate each other's armies, but they'll also hang out together in the Plane of the Gods. The war is kind of like a decades-long game of Monopoly they're having at the family function. And I just think it's cool. Goes into that whole thing about mortals being like ants to uncaring gods that I like.
9. What piece of advice would you say to encourage others to write if they are having a rough patch?
Kinda cliché, but I'd say this: it happens to everyone, dude (gender neutral). Everyone has periods of time when they feel bad and can't write. Or where they feel like their writing is terrible. Doesn't make you less of a writer.
Even if you're not as productive as other people: who cares, honestly? As long as you're having a good time and doing something you love, it doesn't matter how much time you need or don't need to finish something. Even if you never finish anything. And if you feel like you're not as good as other people: who cares either, you know? Everybody starts somewhere. And everybody has different strengths. You'll get better. You always do.
At the end of the day, we're all just doing this because we love it. Don't force yourself. The time will pass anyway.
Ooooookay that last one was a bit more serious than the rest. Anyway, I wanna tag, no pressure, @fleurtygurl @stesierra @cheeto-flavoured-pasta and @sarandipitywrites
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Hi I saw you were doing matchups so I wanted to you try it out lol!
So some basic stuff I go by Aj I’m a trans guy who uses he/they pronouns, while I do have a small preference to girls or well just anyone falling under a feminine label I am open to about anyone! I want the matchup to be romantic and would prefer Husk and Angel to be excluded (I picture Husk as a father and I ship him and angel so be kinda weird lol)
For personality and what not I’m similar to Niffty in the whole absolutely chaotic kinda way but only with the people I know and trust, I’m very kind and while I’ll jokingly make fun of people I make sure they’re okay with it and aren’t actually uncomfortable. At first I’m very quiet and reserved (at most one or two comments) but after opening up it’s hard to get me to stop talking lol I’m also very sarcastic and make a lot of dirty jokes. Likes and dislikes is kinda hard, I like collecting plushies like a lot I could be compared to the “weird kid” (I love fnaf, batim, Beetlejuice, tadc, a lot more) I will say I absolutely love like physical touch and what not though I hate asking for things or starting something. My hobbies mainly include making art and what not I focus on visual art though I do like writing and acting a lot as well, I also love picking something up like a book or movie and just never finishing it lol! Tbh I don’t really have a type besides “sad but bad boy” and even then that’s not really a type lol. But yeah I uh think that’s it have an amazing day/night!
Hey Aj! Thank you for requesting a matchup! We have something in common, I also have the tendency to pick up things and never finishing them ahah; anyway!
A hug is coming your way, as I match you with...
Charlie!
Charlie is sunny, optimistic, and just the right person who would allow you to come out of your initial shell. She loves both your kindness and how chaotic you are, and I’m sure she would be very proud of herself for being able to let you open up quickly and witness your true personality; she loves a talkative and affectionate friend, even more so if they end up becoming her partner.
I’m sure she wouldn’t mind your sarcasm at all either, as long as you don’t get too rude with her; she chuckles at your jokes a lot and sometimes tries to be sarcastic back, resulting in her stammering on her words slightly as she admittedly isn’t the best at this kind of thing. It’s endearing to you though, really, and you reassure her that she doesn’t need to match your personality all the time, you find her lovely as she is – her eyes sparkle at that, finding you very romantic -.
She absolutely loves the fact that you like collecting plushies, in fact she’s a big fan of them herself! She insists on giving a name to each one of them, and if they already have one she wants to know the story behind them at all costs. She also surprises you with one of them from time to time, I feel like she would be at least a bit into gift-giving, and when you inevitably end up sleeping in the same bed she doesn’t want to exclude any of your plushies, resulting in you two sleeping completely surrounded by them!
Charlie is quite the creative person herself, in her own way: she likes musicals and singing, so if the things you’re into have some sort of fan songs or anything like that, she would enjoy learning them and getting into your own interests in general. She also loves anything that you make and showers you in compliments each time you show her one of your creations, which makes you blush a little. She also insists on showing the other residents of the Hotel, but it’s up to you if you want to do that or not, she totally understands if you’d rather keep your art private and in that case she’d feel honoured to be one of the lucky ones who gets to see it.
She encourages you to finish the things you start watching or reading, too! Mostly because she loves doing these activities with you, and she really wants to know what happens at the end...but she also feels guilty finishing them on her own, so if you’re looking for somebody who keeps you excited and entertained when you get into anything, she’s the right demon!
She’s also quite affectionate, hugging you, holding your hand and kissing your cheek whenever she gets the chance, so she doesn’t really mind that you’re not into initiating these kind of things as she will do it herself, as long as you let her know you enjoy it!
All in all you and Charlie definitely have a best friends to lovers kind of relationship, and if you’re wondering how this affects Vaggie (in case you’d be comfortable being in a poly relationship) I can actually see you two being on good terms, she agrees with you and Charlie dating wholeheartedly as I see you two getting along quite well, too!
#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin x reader#x reader#charlie morningstar x reader#charlie x reader#hazbin hotel matchup#hazbin matchup#matchup#matchups#hazbin hotel matchups#hazbin matchups#charlie morningstar
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I need motivation and tips for continuing art. I used it do it so much as a kid but stopped doing it as much for a stupid reason. Someone who I became friends with was a better artist. I was never popular but I had used to kind of be a smidge known in my classes for decent art until she came along and everyone admired her more. Now obvs that wasn't her fault and we actually became friends for a while (until she changed and pushed me away down the line in middle school and high school, but that's neither here nor there). Either way, I didn't do it as much and only did it here and there.
I never really had my own consistent style either. It was all just kind doodles and some full sized drawings. I never did well with humans but did decently with like animals and objects. This was all in a traditional sketchbook too. I eventually started some digital art too as my friend did and she had a natural affinity for it. Once again, seeing myself get outdone. I have a bad habit of feeling like a failure when I am not immediately good at something I try, especially when it is something I really really want to do. Over the years I would have random surges of doing art again but would often get distracted by other things and feel too overwhelmed to pursue the hobbies I like, especially in high school and me now at 21 in college.
I am pursing a degree in animation but haven't even started the actual animation class itself, mostly just the general education requirements and then some other art classes. I finished 2D design, 3D design, drawing, and life art. I feel like my art has gotten decent for objects and animals still, but I struggle with humans. And unfortunately my life art class was pretty awful with the teacher mostly focusing on a few things regarding the body (which don't get me wrong, was helpful at first) and just assigned busy work like 20 skeleton sketches or 10 skulls and 5 full skeletons or whatever and every single class was gesture drawing of the nude models we had and progressing to shading. Again, don't get me wrong, those are definitely important and helped me with improving my skills, but what bugged me was not only how repetitive it was (it felt like my progress plateaued very early into the class as it just became the same thing every time with the teacher not being super engaging), but the fact we never got into the main thing I struggled with when drawing people; the human face.
I am trying to reteach myself how to draw now, having done that life art class like 2 years ago now. I am watching tutorials which have helped a bit, but I think my main issue is not practicing as consistently. A huge factor being motivation. I often get busy so when I have down time, I'd rather do something mindless instead of intentional work like practicing art that I am not gonna like. And when I do draw, even the things I used to think I was decent at like animals and objects and sceneries, I hate them. They look so flat and lifeless and they look super inconsistent style wise when you compare the different aspects of the drawing. It makes me feel unmotivated and scared about my future.
How can I be an animator when I can't even be happy with a still drawing I have made? I adore 2D animation. I adore art. I have so many ideas I can fully visualize in my brain but as soon as pencil touches paper or stylus to tablet, it's like I am a toddler learning how to write. Especially on digital art because I always feel like I am doing something wrong or in the most inefficient way possible. Don't even get me started on the fill bucket tool on drawing programs never actually filling in the full space I want them too and lines never being fully solid and having weird fuzzy edges that make coloring in weird. Even when I try to look up fixes for this it never seems to work (I swap back and forth between drawing in the free program Krita and Adobe Photoshop I have temporarily while in college).
There is the part of me that wants to give up, but then the strong part of me that refuses to because I know this isn't just some random ADHD hyper-fixation I have gotten. It has been a consistent interest of mine since I was in elementary school, fluctuating based on motivation and other external factors, but never something I stopped being interested in. I dunno. I guess I just needed to rant. I need to keep practicing, I know, but I wish I had someone directly next to me at all times giving me the perfect advice and helping me immediately see where I am messing something up or whatever so my improvement can be faster lol. Idk who will even read this. But oh well.
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love and eros may have actually been the best jdrama ever
my lovelorn for lost underapreciated japanese media may stick with me til the end of time I'm afraid. It's how unknown it is that really makes me love it even more. I actually don't know how I feel about the best art getting so little attention and being lost to time. On one hand I like it but then again I wish the people involved would have been able to get recognition. But the again it's possible the Japanese purposely didn't want their precious gems to be given to the west because it would have been changed and altered to fit a wider audience and then it would no longer be art. It would just be a product for mass consumption. I kind of want to write a whole series of my favorite J ent pieces. It's so interesting that Japan actually went out of their way many times to make sure their works wouldn't be spread to those who don't appreciate it. Anime was...as hayao miyazaki would say A MISTAKE. It's the only piece of Japanese media that became heavily focused on reaching a global audience and making a ton of money from it. It's their K-pop. Though with Anime it's just cartoon pictures being objectified and commodified but with K-pop it's people. Still both had a great effect on the economy and a terrible influence on the culture as a whole. The otaku's in Japan and the fan culture in Korea both swirled out of control and ended up having a hand in lowering the birth rate. So art truly is a powerful thing.
This work was one I actually stumbled on when I was on a j ent binge, this and a few other japanese 90s dramas really fascinated me. This one was intriguing and memorable because it was the first time I was aware that whatever Korea had continued with using idols in drama's to boost the rating Japan had most defintely started.
Nagase Tomoya was a hearthrob no doubt and it is also hard to even find someone comparable to him in the current era. In japan being an idol is just a stepping stone and everyone knows this. There aren't really leaders like in kpop. In fact it's usually the visuals that are just in charge or speak for the group. They are the front men or women and it's normal for them to be the face and do interviews alone in the group's stead. No one is ever super emotional when these visuals become actors nor is there an uproar that they are betraying the group. It's natural and they usually are asked to get into different projects because this will eventually get the group more attention in the end. Japanese groups in some cases have EXTREME longevity. Some groups lasting decades. It isn't always the case but the most popular groups it's moreso a question of dang when are they going to disband. This is because the attitude towards idols in japan is different. There are some cases where idols from fanservice heavy groups do get in trouble from dating but its' important to know in Japan it's more of a hierarchy of groups because idol culture has been around for so long. There are some groups that are more dependent on heavy fanservice to survive and there theme is catering to there fans whereas some groups are more..free. It's clear to see these differences when you see some groups that are very free and others that are very not. In korea although I see that all groups are treated like how fanservice heavy groups are in japan. No matter what age it is weird and not acceptable for them to act in romantic drama's or date. The companies and contracts pretty much all around reflect the mindset of the public towards idols. Where in recent years traditional idol culture in japan is kind of slowly dying and because of that celebs dating is seen moreso how american celebs dating. In korea strangely enough it's like things are regressing. The fanservice is becoming even more intense even though kpop is gaining global fame. More money is being made but it's being made by going super jhorror virtual boyfriend/girlfriend parasocial paralysis demon. It's quite concerning. It could be that in Japan they stopped focusing on real people who eventually would date or get married and leave idol life behind to focus on more vulnerable animated or fictional characters who really couldn't speak or fight back.
I still find it interesting to look at the cultural remains of Japan's idol industry.
I don't even want to get into the tradgedy of Johhnny's boys and what happens when young children are commodified off their looks and sex appeal from a super young age because..it speaks for itself. It was terrible what happened and I do feel that overall it's definitely what is happening in kpop but because of the current hype and popularity honestly nobody cares. Similar to how nobody cared about what was happening in america with the many disney stars who would years later open up about how the trauma they experienced being a childstar would later cause them to become drug addicts or commit self harm. People may feel sorry for them now but the truth is at the time when it was happening nobody cared and that is what made them feel so alone. It doesn't help to pity them after the fact when they have healed and gone to therapy.
Although I think it was rather unfortunate what many of child stars go through I do think the art they leave behind should be treasured even more so because of it. Tomoya was a fabulous actor and I see in him many of the current idols of today that are treasured.
I believe he was extremely lucky given that he was able to stay in a band that spanned decades and have a very successful acting career. When I watched this show not only was I interested in the plot but I also was wondering why were so many idols barred from also having similar opportunities. Some like him were able to act in various projects playing different characters but others were stuck in a box because their fans weren't interested in seeing them any differently. I believe he was such a compelling performer that it allowed him to be accepted by the public as an actor.
but I can't lie Johnny kitigawa's connectiong probably helped as well..also his face plus the fact that he aged well probably helped. Many idols get copius amounts of plastic surgery that does not age well at all
but there are still other decent looking idols that never kept up with the changing tides of the ent industry. On an old translated forum some people were arguing why he wasn't as famous as Takuya Kimura
but I think it's because the japanese love androgyny like over everything Tomoya was just a tad bit too masculine.
In this show though and others like it he starred in he was a silent brooding type so it worked. I don't want to spoil it and this isn't a review basically it's a comparasion of different types of love. Which is ..kind of genius. His character is in a eros or romantic type of love with a woman engaged to his brother. Who has a much more friendly type of love with her. It's probably a metaphor for something but..hmmh oh and it has the iconic Hosho mai
her role isn't that big she is toted as mostly just the tagalong girlfriend but really as the show progresses you start to like her more than the main love interest.
anywayz its a good show very deep if you watch it closely.
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3, 11, 13 and 14 for the Fire Emblem ask game?
3. What titles have you played? So far I've only been able to play the newest titles, Awakening, Fates, Echoes, Three Houses (and it's Warriors spinoff), and Engage, although I've technically played the DS Shadow Dragon remake via an emulator bc my DS copy got sold but I just uh, got bored and have never finished it. Also playing FE on a computer emulator's a...really weird experience and I prefer using a console, so I've had a hard time getting into the older games (although I did read the entire script for Path of Radiance and part of Radiant Dawn, and one of these days I'll watch playthroughs of both games if IntSys doesn't remake them or port them to a system I actually have).
11. A character that deserved better? Oh where to start. I feel like a lot of the Fates cast suffered in the characterization department bc there were so many characters and the writing team got stretched way thin, and so there's a lot of playable characters that get ignored by both IntSys and the fandom who I think are a delight if people would just look past their joke trait for five seconds, but for unplayable characters I think Lilith could have benefited from more attention bc she's very cool but there's so much going on in Fates that she's kinda...sidelined too. (Also I have a Lot of thoughts about Ikona as a character despite her being very dead, never getting a design, and barely having any story significance, but that's probably more a me thing).
For Echoes definitely Faye (rip) bc damn if the writers and fans didn't do her dirty. Like Fates, we'd be here all day if I listed every grievance I had about every 3H character, but my guy Cyril deserves the world and not the treatment he got from the writers (mostly for the spinoff) and especially not from fans. For Engage, which I am fairly happy with overall, well...Marni, you would have loved Alear's giant friend-family-group if only the writers loved you as much as I (and a few other fans) do.
13. What do you like most about Fire Emblem? Oooh, there's a lot, I mean I keep coming back to the series for a reason, right? I really enjoy the overall gameplay but especially some of the weird mechanics that make it so I can do wild things every playthrough despite usually sticking to similar strategies overall. Narratively I love, love, love the characters and especially the supports, there's always such a wide variety. It's also really neat to see the art style change every few games bc it means there's never really one "look" to FE (even if I'm way biased bc Hidari has been my favorite lead illustrator so far; I really do enjoy seeing all the different art styles, it's so fun). Also the music is always excellent, and I've actually quite enjoyed the full voice acting the past few games
14. Something you really don't like about this series? The fandom. I mean, okay, yes there's lots of things I could complain about for the games themselves (I'm not fond of the loli dragons as a visual design trope, I think a lot of the fantasy racism is handled in poor taste, I'm not a huge fan of the split-routes as a gameplay or story mechanic, the gender-locked classes are so stupid to me, etc. etc.), but like? Honestly more so over the past few years than when I first got into FE, the fandom's been a really exhausting experience bc any problematic tropes that get used in the narrative are nothing compared to the actual issues I've come across in the fandom (i.e. some fans are racist--and specifically antisemetic--towards other fans over these fictional characters, and honestly I think real live people getting harassed over some fiction media is way scarier than the issues of race being handled poorly by the writers).
Like, yes I still haunt the FE tag bc I have half the fandom here blocked, but it's exhausting to have to keep updating my blocklist after so many years. Anytime I talk to someone in-person about FE I always add the "but listen the online fandom sucks, so maybe avoid it". Like, sure the fandom's not as toxic as what I've heard about some other games, but damn.
Not to say the fandom's all bad--I never would have found your blog if not for FE, and there are so many fans who are chill and fun, and I love seeing all the fanart and headcanons and theories and other fun things, and I do enjoy reading a good critical analysis when I can find one too as well as just general analyses like when people look at the Buddhist themes in the games or the recurring narrative themes (brings me back to reading research papers in college if they're written a certain way), and I still love making my own art stuff for FE and coming up with my own silly headcanons and theories and analyses. Because despite everything my experiences with the negative side of the fandom have somehow, miraculously, not withered my deep love of the characters and series overall. So like, there is a lot of good here too, and I try not to focus so much on the negative aspects of things I enjoy bc it doesn't do anything for me. But sometimes I am Very Tired, y'know?
#unsuspecting-person#ask game#I still don't have an ask tag#for context the fandom was already a bit exhausting before 3H bc of Fates but 3H kinda was my breaking point regarding the fandom#like I didn't start liberally blocking blogs until the batshit fandom nonsense of 3H#but I still love the series a whole lot and those fans who are chill and kind and I will continue to be insufferable about FE bc I love it
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As someone who has watched too much tv for a long time i thought i should share with the group.
TV recs for the upcoming drought:
Some of these are harder to find, the tone and quality vary wildly, they're in no specific order. I tried for not too obscure, but not too obvious. Some are still airing, some are 20 yrs old. I swear I have a life.
Slings and Arrows. Early 2000s Canadian dramedy about theatre and shakespear. Fun without being shallow, aged ok, lovely performances, great writing. nuclear grade comfort watching.
Halt and Catch Fire. 2014 - 2017, US drama. Follows four characters through the 80s tech industry. First time I got the hype around Lee Pace. S1 is ok, but nothing special, s2 is a lot more interesting but kinda goes round in a circle. S3 and 4 and some of the best tv I've ever seen.
Somebody Somewhere. This is actually a new show, but has 2 seasons out if u want a gentle but never shallow comedy. Fills my sad gay heart with joy. And if want more new tv with middle aged gays Deadloch is streaming on amazon atm.
The Expanse. Finished recently. The sci fi I've always wanted. Big and scary and wonderful and pew pew pew space battles and adventure. Balances the grim with a surprising amount of hope? Has repeated themes of redemption. Also a whole book series should u need more.
This Is England. UK drama. A film and 3 mini series set from 1983 through to 1990. Grim, sad af, also funnyand sweet? And characters that I love. The start of my undying love for Vicky McClure. Big ol CW for violence, sexual violence, and era specific racism (esp the first film). Very good, but very hard tv.
Kingdom. 2014. Can be a pain to find because so many shows are called Kingdom. About MMA fighters having drama. Also families, mental health, addiction, etc. Excellent performances. Both a very dumb and very sweet, painful show.
Animal Kingdom. Legit only watched it because I was searched Kingdom posts and AK was out around the same time. Awful family having drama and heists. Adaptation of an Aussie film into a southern California TV show. Kind of a mess? but very compelling mess.
Obligatory Succession (Kardashians for annoying people, aka me. I am the annoying person. this is my perfect tv show), The Bear, (hospo stress and family grief show) and Severance (people talk about workplace horror, but tbh it also gives big mega church horror vibes too)- new shows that live up to the hype, esp if you like sad people. I don't think they really need recs, but i really liked them.
The Thick of It. 2000s UK political comedy? Tragedy? Though these days it looking fuckin utopian compared to UK politics now. Feels a bit like a partial villain origin story for Succession. I like how sad and broken hearted it is.
Outrageous Fortune. 2000s nz dramedy that is the source of my love of family crime drama. Aged badly in places, but still very good character drama. Also, for The Boys fans, Antony Starr at his absolute best. It's a big nostalgia fest for me now. Cheryl West is a forever fav.
Justified. 2010 - 2016ish. i'm lazy i'm not looking stuff up. Yes a cop show, yes a dad show, but also rock solid tv writing and timothy olyphant in a hat. I've watched it so many times, and every time it rewards. and yes, am watching Justified City Primeval atm.
White Collar. A dumb, total fantasy art crimes and capers show. Shit, but if you need to not think and also have Matt Bomer do a shirtless painting montage for vague plot reasons then oh boy there is no other.
Being Human UK. A ghost, a vampire and a werewolf share a flat. it's sweet and agonising and 10+ years later I still love these characters so much.
Legion. 2017 - 2019. Why make tv comic adaptations that are trying for realistic and boring? When they could all be like this? Why make anything that isn't as visually interesting as this?
Doom Patrol - same for doom patrol - superhero tv that cut out the boring bits and just went for the weird and painful. I read a couple of random doom patrols years ago and was so surprised and delighted and loved them. the tv show has the same effect.
The Boys. new, and still going, as far as I know. but two kiwi leads means under nz law i have to be a fan? also it's awful, pulpy vicious popcorn viewing. appeals to the shithead 12 yr old in me. yes, it's vicious anti corporate thing is deeply ironic for an amazon show, but considering amazon saved the expanse with no sense of irony at all I figure take all their money and keep yelling.
Preacher. Another comics adaption. The Boy's weirder, less obscene, more disturbing cousin. Tulip is another forever fav tv character.
Banshee. Continuing the tradition of heth and i starting dumb Dude TV and then getting overly attached. kinda pulpy trash, but if you can stomach the violence it's surprisingly good.
All Star Treks. I love them so much. They're so weird, and uneven, and dumb, and they're all the best and I love them.
One season wonders -
Trust. about the John Paul Getty III kidnapping. also about italian countryside.
State of Play. UK. the tv show, not the film.
I dunno. I could do a whole separate post for sit coms and brit coms and the weirder, more obscure shows and movies, but ffs this is so long.
#tv recs#see my justification is that i can draw while watching#this is my list so i doubt everything on it would appeal to anyone else#but some of it might#i fuckin love me some dramedy#i have a lot of thoughts and feelings about tv#as a medium and it's role in my weird life
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A post about Brutal Doom
I was thinking of when i could repost something i wrote before on this blog and now it seems Midnight made a video about BD drama.
You know what? Might as well do it.
This post might still be flawed but i tried:
What is Brutal Doom? A popular Doom mod, maybe the most popular. A mod that makes Doom "crazier" by making its gore more complex and including an ability to perform Mortal Kombat inspired “fatalities” on enemies. It also has features comparable to modern FPS like reloading and ADS. And a bunch of other stuff added for the sake of immersion and insanity (Whether it's intentional insanity or not depends). To some people, it’s “what id Software wanted to make back then” or “the best and only Doom mod ever”. Its popularity and critical acclaim almost paint a blurry image of the mod and so does some of its negative criticisms and drama. Doom is always hit with misinformation and half memories due to Dunning Krueger/osmosis/second half info/game of telephone/Mandela effect tier stuff going on. Brutal Doom is probably the biggest example.
What are its actual flaws? Any mod has its own differences and design decisions from base Doom and aren’t inherently bad just because they’re different; In fact, some mods are great because of what they are, even if they can be better on some maps than others. BD, despite being the “default Doom” to some people, had its issues and some probably weren’t intentional (But might be fixed as of me writing this, so this list is outdated).
The balance was known for being odd, so the shotgun would be OP during ADS and render the SUPER shotgun useless. You could defeat the Cyberdemon with 7 rockets or 3 SSG blasts. Headshots based hitboxes were once placed above enemies, so you had to shoot above a Baron. Some enemy radius were changed, so Cyberdemons and Arachnotrons could be stuck in some places. The player’s voodoo doll was modified in a way that affected some wads like Scythe. A feature of automatically adding props/features to maps (To make them “realistic”) had an issue where iron bars would block main paths and enemy projectiles could go through them but not the player’s) The art direction was also inconsistent, as some blood splatter effects had different resolution from other effects in the game. Sprites of picking up enemies as hostages looked weird and a HUD face for a playable female option had a weird looking face (To be fair, some female mugshots in Doom mods looked weird too). You also had a HUD so disorganized, where a totally different font was on top of the ARMS section in the base old Doom HUD and a grenade counter icon was set outside the HUD (Some weird stuff here and there, with no coherence or direction). And in Brutal Doom 64, chaingunners were invisible.
It’s normal for mods to have these problems because they’re fan projects, but some of these problems were either unique to BD or not that common, while a lot of other mods tried to avoid these things. BD is also said to have “spaghetti code” to the point that a version broke with GZDoom because Mark wrote the letter L where a 1 should have been.
But even then, BD is not so much judged on technical flaws, because of other things like drama including its creator. Even then, worse mods exist. I think ProDoomer for example is notorious for its problems.
How did it got popular? Game journalists giving the mod credit for features that existed prior in other mods and Youtubers (Markiplier and TotalBiscuit) are obvious examples. But there’s also a popular BD based mappack which borrowed FreeDoom maps and it’s how some people got into Doom. The amount of misinfo, its basic appeal (More gore, “modernized” etc) and the influence from the Doom comic are also noticeable. BD was also liked because of its "feedback" (As in how satisfying it felt to play to its audience), even if you think some sounds are too loud or visuals are too flashy (But people loved that regardless). The mod was popular among people that didn’t delve that much into Doom and its modding scene, so BD had its own subculture with submods and off-shoots content. It was essentially like a fanfiction treated as canon (In a series whose fanbase already touched how we talk about/look at/remember/play the games to begin with). John Romero once said that if Doom came out like BD, it would have “destroyed the industry”; He was commenting on the absurdity of the mod but people thought he was saying "it's how we wish we did it". BD64 was also nominated in a “best fan projects” section from 2016’s VGA’s and won.
On a bright side, BD did brought some people into Doom and other mods, so they don’t just stop at BD. There’s even BD inspired mods that try to “fix” the mod or are liked by people that don’t like the original BD.
(Boiled Doom, BD Johnny, BD Lite, Burl Tumd) So for all the "Doom illiteracy", there's some people getting deeper into the Doom iceberg/rabbit hole or whatever term you'd use.
Plus, there's a few other mods that got big enough to have their own subcultures. Complex Doom also has its own addons/submods and fanbase: Megaman 8-bit Deathmatch has its subculture, even if it's mainly because it's based off another game series (But Doom is no stranger to crossovers).
And right now as of editing this, MyHouse had its impact but it might aslo be related to things like the "Liminal Spaces" stuff, so who knows what weird impact it could have.
Historical revisionism (sort of) BD was given credit for features that existed in other mods and source ports, since its audience were people not too knowledgeable on Doom modding in general. Romero likes the mod but he never saw it as “what Doom should be”; His comment on “destroying the industry” was about the absurd gore. But various sites and content online still kept mentioning BD like they had too. Like the Doom version of someone who wants to talk about Tomba and another guy feels the need to mention that one popular SGDQ 2014 stream because of the memes around it.
(The internet is a reverse to a real party where a guy ruins the mood by bringing up something awkward, so instead everyone brings up the awkward thing and one guy is left alienated and in an awkward mood)
BD’s popularity meant people had certain ideas of the games and their mods that were misguided and not really true. I honestly think BD is just a microcosm of a fanbase that, for better or worse, “owned and readapted” a series in a way that can’t easily be separated from fans.
The community’s reaction and drama It’s not true that BD is only hated because “purist boomers hate anything new” or “modders were jealous of its popularity”. Some modders did however made it so their mods were incompatible with BD and pulled off goofy pranks: This is not just because of drama, but also because BD fans were asking other modders to make their mods compatible with BD and because SgtMark’s code was notorious for being sloppy at the time.
But the reasons why people hated Mark was because of how he behaved at the time. One instance, someone discovered a racist joke in the code (Something to do with the Plasma Rifle being described as “being so hot, it turns a white guy into a ** than rap music” or something like that). Another instance was a user claiming he was feeling depression and Mark replied with a Wikipedia article of suicide. These 2 in particular were seen as the worst cases and lead to Mark being banned on most Doom forums. Other drama includes Mark not properly crediting artists of the sprites used in his mod.
These are things that did happen, however, most people never post links or screenshots of them. This is the reason why people think BD drama feels fake at times: For someone that has an infamous history in a community, rarely do people post evidence that this ever happened. In turn, some people think Mark is being falsely accused.
One video that showed off BD’s glitches did use screenshots based on some events, but this video has an interesting story: You know the site Encyclopedia Dramatica? They used that video in an article about Doom. While most people saw Mark as an edgelord, ED treated Mark like any “loser lolcow”. This is surprising because, considering their nature, you’d think they would praise Mark for being edgy.
Maybe in some chan sites, people like that Mark was edgy (Or hate him for not being edgy enough). 4chan’s /vr/ board can be critical of Doomworld and ZDoom Forums but they also were critical of Mark’s personality and (At least in 2017/18) were the ones that most criticized BD for its gameplay and code problems. While most people heard stories of Mark’s character, /vr/ posted screenshots and webms of BD’s glitches and problems. Some even see BD as “Doom’s own Yandere Simulator”.
But there are also times when Mark wanted to stay away from drama: I think there was a version of a Project Brutality mod that had some patch to make it unplayable and crash someone’s game if mixed with BD. I recall this being an instance where Mark was getting tired of drama.
And like many other people in the community, even SgtMark criticized an update of WolfenDoom Blade of Agony that was going to a direction people thought was too far for a mod. (Something to do with a Wolfenstein inspired by trying to have specific real life references in the setting: This lead to Realm667 being down for a while and Tormentor distancing himself from the community for a while: As of writing this, maybe this drama is also waters under the bridge). Plus, Doom’s fanbase always had its sorts of drama. Let’s not forget Graf Zahl having to take a break from GZDoom development because he didn’t like that Lilith PK3 won a Cacoward.
And as of currently, a majority of people left the ZDoom Forums due to MarisaDesu and how others handled the situation badly.
More on SgtMarkIV Despite what happened, he is unbanned on Doomworld, he occasionally collaborates with other people and doesn’t get into drama anymore. It’s possible that Mark grew from all that mess, since people can change and other people in the Doom community had their own dramas and controversies.
Maybe one could also point out that he’s from Brazil, so consider the troubles of living in that country. Plus, a lot of edgy people in the internet come from countries within that middle/south American zone and/or with Latino-adjacent languages.
He also made more than just Brutal Doom, since Doom modders tend to be involved in different projects. He even made maps that were liked by people who otherwise dislike BD. Some modders and other people also had positive interactions, including Nash who did a gore based more before BD.
Did BD inspire Doom 2016? Being the most popular (And a bit forced/astroturfed) Doom mod, this seems believable at first. Hell, Doom Eternal has some enemy designs (Fire Baron, Stone Imp, Riot Chaingunner) that can be traced to Realm667 designs. But BD’s premise was based on some basic ideas that probably existed before (Nash for example did a gore mod that predates BD). 2016 claims its inspiration from the “meme” Doom comic, which was popular among fans, even if it was originally panned at the time.
But it’s more than the comic, 2016 is based on other parts of the fanbase. Death Battle made a popular video where Doomguy faces Master Chief and loses; Doom fans were upset because they think he should have won and even Halo fans thought the fight wasn’t truly faithful to either of the series’ gameplay or lore. You could even point out Doom fans being jealous of Halo “ruining FPS” and having a green armored soldier, hence the comparisons between Master Chief and 2016’s Praetor armored Slayer. Plus, when did a blank slate whose face bled on the HUD and was shown hurt in the iconic box art was seen as “being stronger than he actually is”? 4chan had one or two meme copypastas where someone described how strong Doomguy is and most of it is just basing Doomguy’s “Power level” on gameplay factors and the games’ little lore it had. Chances are some of this was ironic since one post even compared Doomguy to a generalized idea of “JRPG teams who kill God with the power of friendship” but some people took it seriously. It’s like Chuck Norris memes but based on a specific character and you wonder how much comes from jealousy over a certain other character.
Either way, the Doomslayer can be seen as fanservice to some fans but still with its own ideas and concepts. Besides, both Doom 3 and FPS during 7th gen were seen as presenting ideas that contradict the values of classic FPS, so 2016 was a “responsive” type of game. Hell, 2016 had no reloading, which once became default for FPS games in a while. Doom is associated with speed, even if it’s because of Quake and the presence of ALWAYS_RUN in source ports.
Doom fanbase status Not everyone into Doom is a modder or anyone that cares about wads. But i do believe that anything around mods, wads, ports, documentation and so on could be seen in a high regard. Because ever since 2016 and Eternal, the fanbase has grown and you can see different “layers” in a way.
This results in people hating Brutal Doom based on poorly received and limited information. They know the community hates it but have no strong base around it. Between Youtubers that came around 2020 and people who make Animal Crossing crossover fanart, it feels like they want to impress the old guard. Meanwhile, /vr/ actually used to show BD being buggy and awkward. And /vr/ had fans of more niche/demanding mods like Hideous Destructor. I feel like people could at least research these stories about BD or ask someone for better proof, but also know that Mark may not be the same guy he was in those times.
Personal takes I tried to be a bit “diplomatic” because BD discussion is a bit of a mess and there’s a lot to be said from various prespectives. Even if i stole opinions or perspectives of others, i tried to go for more obscure ones (People say Doom fans repeat the same jokes, when i see people repeating statements and other stuff). There’s a lack of objectivity and verification from “both sides, even the middle” and i tend to explore different corners of the fanbase to add a bit more sense. Especially in a series that was manipulated by its fanbase in ways that even the old guard doesn’t realize.
The reason why i think other mods should be acknowledged besides Brutal Doom is because Doom modding is a greater universe on its own and it shows how much can be done with the iconic FPS. Part of why i think there could be other award events besides Cacowards and that any time someone disagrees with changes of a certain source port, they should be free to make their own fork of it and base it on their personal preferences or interests of potential target audiences.
Doom modding is a product of freedom and expression from fans, given by John Carmack being influenced by “hacker culture”. Think of topics like being pro consumer or videogame preservation and documentation. Doom has a lot of things that other videogames could benefit from in terms of fanbase interaction. Even with Quake: I like that single player mods are getting popular, but i hope it doesn’t kill off Q1 multiplayer and any interest for Quake 2 or other games. Even if you dislike a game or something related, don’t let it die. Elitism over what you can/can't do feels out of place in modding and open source scenes or even hacking.
This whole post could have been done by someone that knows better and could present it in a better way than i did. In fact, i say this about any Doom “blogpost” i wrote. However, discussion around BD is so messy, i even question some otherwise wiser figures. Maybe it’s from an OCD mindset of trying to make sure everything is clear and fair. The truth is complicated and people prefer shortcuts for answers. I know “let’s all get along” is a boring, cliche thing to day. But Doom has a special fanbase and for all the faults and dramas, i think there are things to learn and some solutions that should be fair to more people.
Regardless of who you are, if you're reading this, you have some things you’re really good at and that’s something to be proud of. And it’s also nice to do new things and enjoy the works of others or collaborate. I dunno what else to add. I made too many Doom blogposts, i should actually make a map or real content.
But i still want to post stuff, since i haven't reposted the actual "Doom fanbase status" and some other stuff like Doom and Halo or whatever.
A post i recommend checking out (Could even inspire an interesting Youtube video) is this one about things that can be traced to Doom fans.
#doom#modding#doom modding#classic doom#id software#opinions#fandom#fanbase#brutal doom#doom 2016#doom eternal#john romero
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