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bbq-hawks-wings · 2 years

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HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS: Chapter 353-354

Hey, folks, we're finally at the end ready to review the latest couple of chapters after only... *counts* SIX full-sized posts in so many days.

By the way, kids, go look up what "scope creep" is some time. The knowledge might save your sanity some day, assuming you properly plan for it unlike me.

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming.

Shouto's victory over Dabi is an inspirational force among the heroes when the news rings out. All of the other heroes are facing enormous, existential fear on an individual level despite being more than willing to fight and that's understandable - they're only human. Nevertheless, a young, teenage hero who had barely received his provisional license faced his own brother - one of AFO's top fighters, nonetheless - and all but single-handedly took him down. It's a major morale boost which also understandably serves to rattle the opposition.

Btw, knowing that Spinner accepted AFO's offer to make him stronger before the strike, I really want to know how his story's going to play out. He isn't near Shigaraki, AFO, Dabi, or Toga, so this could be interesting to see him spotlighted alone once again.

I'm also excited to finally get some quality screen time with Tentacole whom I believe to be criminally neglected in the series as a whole. Rooting for you, Cephalopod Son!

The news of Dabi's fall reaches Endeavor and the other heroes facing AFO.

And now I'm so glad to have gotten these chapters all at once. Hawks knew going into it that AFO would taunt Endeavor specifically where he was sensitive exactly like he did, but I don't think he anticipated AFO being able to find any fodder that would actually get under HIS skin, and that will likely really come into play later, even if we don't see the results of the battle for a few more chapters, and that's where I predict anything new or unsure about Hawks and his feelings are going to come out.

Now, I love this interaction and series of events. We all know it was Hawks that rose me from my dormant state on this blog. Up to this point there's only so much we had to talk about, especially since what was being speculated in the discussions of leaks that I saw were really far off from what the official translation wound up to be.

The panel about him calling himself "crippled" when AFO tries to make him feel weak and Hawks just deflects it, AFO not getting anything out of him by calling him "Nagant's replacement", and the comment Hawks made about him making "a clean break" from his family history were very sensationalized and taken out of context when I saw them. So far, everything seems to be well within character for Hawks, and literally none of that stuff bothers him. He knows AFO is just the villain trying to get his way, and Hawks has already put on his armor for whatever he anticipated AFO to throw at him.

The only thing that AFO did that actually got to Hawks was wound Endeavor. Hawks' weakness far more than his need for prosthetic wings are those he cares about and his mission. And now, Endeavor has been impaled like the shish kabob.

Damn it, Endeavor. It's okay, though, this is actually the spot I wanted to catch up to, because this is where i think we get the best Hawks characterization crumbs of the chapter.

Up to this point, the main motivation for Hawks as a whole has been the same since he woke up in the hospital- "Finish the job I started as soon as possible because we're running out of time!" It's been weeks. Things have only gotten worse. The goal has never changed - only the logistics and limitations it took to reach that goal. He needs to end it yesterday. Hawks has long accepted that his death may be a necessary price in that equation, and he's at peace with that if it really will bring about the change he wants to see. Sacrificing himself so Endeavor can live and defeat AFO is more than reasonable to him.

These two, though. They weren't in the plan. They weren't in the calculations, ever, because unlike him these were never acceptable potential loses to Hawks. In the moment, he doesn't consider their abilities or the fact that they just saved his life. He can't risk losing them, so they were never a consideration in this fight before.

On the subject of mind games, I think it's safe to say that AFO is going to try to leverage Hawks' protectiveness of the kids to get him to slip up later on, but Tsukoyomi is the one who'll help him psychologically stay on task, while Earphone Jack plays more traditional power support. Tsukoyomi has experience keeping up with Hawks in real time, plus he has a good idea of how his teacher thinks. He also has known and worked closely with Earphone Jack as her classmate for more than two years now, and as she doesn't have to be the one maneuvering she can just focus on communicating with Tsukoyomi to set her up for success.

It's a clutch impromptu support team and one that only gets better if Endeavor is able to rejoin them. There's likely going to be bumps and hiccups, I predict predominantly on Hawks' end and difficulties keeping Jirou airborne, just because of the desperateness of the situation; but the actual important things here is we're going to hopefully get some real quality Bird Bros material in a moment and get to see the goths kids kill it out there. I'm here for it!!!

#bnha 353 #bnha 354 #she speaks #bnha chapter review #let's talk hawks

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chainofclovers · 3 years

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Ted Lasso 2x9 thoughts

It’s no secret that I absolutely adore Coach Beard; he’s one of my favorite characters on the show, and he’s so well-written and well-acted that somehow I tend to be both perfectly satisfied with the details we see and truly curious to understand more about the way he thinks, what’s really happening re: his professional and personal devotion to Ted, where he comes from and where he’s going. I don’t need to know his name beyond the name he wants to be called, but I want to know why we don’t have any other names for him. And I don’t need him to be a bigger focal point of every episode, but I very much needed this episode’s world-exploding reminder that every single character on this show has a rich inner life, full of joys and troubles.

“Beard After Hours” is like a movie, but one that scatters its climaxes and puts off its resolutions...because it’s not a movie. It’s episode nine of a twelve-episode season of TV. When the episode ended, I felt this almost frantic “But he needed to break up with Jane for good before the end of the episode!” feeling. I was so pulled in by the idea of being able to tell an entire story in one night, of going on an odyssey alongside a complicated hero, that watching Beard and Jane find each other in that club felt as intense as the fact that we don’t know if Ted responded to Rebecca’s voicemail and we don’t know what’s going to happen with Rebecca and Sam and we don’t know who isn’t getting married and who is having a funeral in 2x10 (I mean, I have my strong suspicions, but still!) and we don’t know if Richmond will be promoted back to the Premier League. And on and on. I didn’t mind feeling desperate for the story to resolve even though I understood after thinking about it for ten seconds that of course it couldn’t resolve yet. Or ever. Or yet.

I’m a big fan of the TL episode recaps/reviews Linda Holmes writes for NPR, and I have to quote something from this week’s directly because it so perfectly explains my feelings:

The power of the scene where Beard dances in the club isn't that it's a beautiful romantic climax. It's that it's an explanation of why he cannot seem to extricate himself from this bad relationship. What makes the worst relationships so dangerous is that they have elements that feel good that are very hard to get elsewhere. Beard knows that; he tells it to God. What's concerning isn't that Jane makes the world seem more interesting; what's concerning is she's the only thing that does. That doesn't take away from the joy of the dancing; it just tells you that even happiness is complicated.

I love Holmes’ perspective here so much, because it articulates something I was struggling to figure out: how it can feel so legitimate, like such a (temporary but nonetheless powerful) relief, for Beard to find Jane in that club and to have this moment of euphoria as his night nears an end. How it is possible to experience that relief on behalf of a character while fervently wishing it could end differently, because it’s so clear from the abusive text messages and the toxic calls and the manipulative interactions that Jane is terrible to him and they’re terrible for each other. But Beard knows this. He knows it when he hugs Higgins in the parking lot after Higgins is honest with him in a way Ted and Rebecca and Keeley have not learned how to be, and he knows it when part of his prayer includes the clear articulation that Jane isn’t the cure for what “ails me.” He’s inching closer to greater self-knowledge just as Ted is.

And the two big resolutions that really, really needed to happen did. I didn’t know I needed Paul, Baz, and Jeremy to get to wrap up their own night out on the pitch at Nelson Road, but I did. It brought actual tears to my eyes. And the other resolution was Beard showing up with the other coaches’ coffees for their meeting to watch the game film. As interesting as it would have been to see what Ted would have done if Beard hadn’t shown up, I’m so, so glad that he did. He’s got a messed-up face and some truly epic pants on, but otherwise this is just Beard showing up for work, showing up for his friends. It was incredible to realize that Beard and Ted haven’t been exaggerating when they’ve referred to his sex-and-drug proclivities in the past. The night documented in 2x9 might have been particularly scary and violent and euphoric and awful and meaningful, but this type of all-night adventure isn’t a foreign concept for this guy. In all the other episodes of this show, when we see Beard we’re seeing someone who might have been out all night, who might have spent the hours the sun was down desperately pushing himself closer to whatever edges he could find.

I don’t really want to touch upon all the allusions in this episode. They are abundant, they are well-documented, and also I haven’t even seen the movie After Hours. I enjoyed this episode for its allusive qualities and I enjoyed this episode for what it was and I feel like I have to be at peace with the fact that I’m never going to pick up on every single reference on this show and that is okay.

So, yeah, if this entry on my tumblr dot com blog seems remarkably devoid of references and allusions, it’s not because I’m not into it but because I find it too overwhelming to actually write about.

Very into the Misplaced and Discovered box at the Crown and Anchor. (That’s what Mae wrote on the Lost and Found box at the pub, right? Whatever it is, it’s so funny.)

Beard hallucinating Thierry Henry and Gary Lineker was truly upsetting and a great indicator not only of how broken things are between the Richmond coaching staff right now but also how deep Beard’s self-loathing might go. If you’d asked me before Thursday if I thought Beard loathed himself, I would say no. That deepening of knowledge alone makes 2x9 worth it.

James Tartt and his friends in the alley. Such a nightmare. I go back and forth on how much of the night was real, and part of me has decided all of it is, short of the images of Henry and Lineker. (And even that is real to the extent that it was a way of articulating what was in Beard’s head.) But watching Beard in physical danger brought on by the same abuser who had him so upset in the first place. It was a lot.

I’m so excited that Paul and Jeremy and Baz got some spotlight this episode. It was so wonderful to see them out of the pub. I love that they ended up telling the Oxford snots who they really were. They got to see Beard going to bat for them and smoothing over the situation socially, and that actually made it more possible for them to end up being truthful about themselves. Because they have nothing to be ashamed of, and they deserved the magic of that night. (And for it to end on Nelson Road. Every feeling. Oof.)

I feel like I barely have anything to say about the trouser-mending lady or the many places Beard goes or his key-dropping or the nightmarish feeling of wanting to be home and being unable to be home. It all happened and we all watched it and again, it was a lot. But I do feel incredibly moved and fascinated by the fact that Beard very obviously still hasn’t been home when he brings in the coffee. He’s had to sleep at the club for Jane- and key-related reasons in the past, and this time it’s not that he’s slept there but it still feels like a kind of homecoming he was robbed of for the entire night. Ted and Roy and Nate are there. He’s gotten their coffee orders correct. Ted is growing and evolving (he wants to learn from what’s happened, he’s insisting upon it even when the others resist) but he’s done a really perfect (almost romantic in its loveliness) thing by presumably spending his evening following a breakdown of his own speeding up the game film to 10x speed and adding Benny Hill. Ted is not OK and Beard is not OK and Nate is not OK and Roy is pretty OK but could very easily be not OK because he’s just joined a coaching staff with a whole lot of not OK. But they all showed up.

I am very into the realism of the lights being off in the club other than the coaches’ office (@talldecafcappuccino pointed this out!), and the way we’re seeing their desks from a different angle because this episode is unfocused on Ted. It really added to the mindset of being hungover and exhausted and unable to go home or even to know exactly what home should be; even this warm, familiar place feels off even as it’s a relief to be back there.

I am excited to return to our regularly scheduled programming with the full cast of characters, but I really adored this episode for what it taught us about Beard and what it illuminated about the humor, pain, and complexity of each person who inhabits this universe. Beard may not be loud about his long-standing beliefs or about the things he’s learned, but there’s a lot happening in there and I appreciated getting to spend 43 minutes with him and (in the case of the ticket he scrawls on a piece of paper so the pub guys can get into Nelson Road) the moments he sets in motion.

#ted lasso #ted lasso s2 spoilers #ted lasso 2x9 #meta by me #a lesbian watches ted lasso #coach beard

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gimme-mor · 3 years

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ACOTAR: THE LAST CURSEBREAKER

*I interrupt our regularly scheduled ship war programming to bring you this shitpost*

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Spring. Summer. Autumn. Winter. Dawn. Day. Night. Long ago, the seven fae courts lived in harmony. Then, everything changed when Amarantha deceived the High Lords, forced them into submission, and proclaimed herself High Queen of Prythian. Only a mortal, with a deep mistrust and hatred for the faeries, who freely confesses her love for Tamlin can save the court from its curse; but when the Spring Court needed Feyre most, the High Lord sent her back to the Mortal Lands. Weeks have passed and now the members of the Spring Court are Amarantha’s prisoners. And although Feyre knew she was at a disadvantage, she was willing to go Under the Mountain to win the freedom of the Spring Court. With the help of some unlikely allies, Feyre managed to break Amarantha’s curse and ended her reign, restoring peace to the fae lands.....for now.

#acotar shitpost #feyre archeron #my friend had accidentally said acotar the last airbender #and i just couldn't get the idea out of my head lol

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screensirenfic · 4 years

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GUESS WHO’S BACK BITCHES!!!

So after taking my extended holiday from posting, a fuck ton of work projects and 2 failed relationships; I’m pleased to announce the hiatus is over.

Menthol Cigarettes is going to resume its regularly scheduled programming come Saturday and hopefully keep coming up bi-weekly until we roll this train wreck into station.

I just wanna thank all you guys for your immense patience as you waited for the second coming, and take the chance to welcome aboard all our new passengers who jumped onboard whilst I was AWOL.

Peace, love and Lola

SS x

#stranger things #stranger things fandom #fanfic #fanfiction #jim hopper daughter #billy hargrove x oc #billy hargove x reader #billy hargrove x original character #Billy Hargrove #steve harrington #eleven sister #eleven #jane hopper #jim hopper #robin buckley #max mayfield

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book-of-charlie · 4 years

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Zukka Goes to a Ball

Hi, this was supposed to be a fluffy oneshot, but then i wrote out the bullet points, and if I write it later I will add a link to it here but for now it’s gonna be a bullet point fic lads, enjoy

(also I wrote this at like 2 am so I’m sorry for the inevitable spelling mistakes and slight rambling)

AU where Iroh took the throne after Lu Ten died, Ozai was cast out for disrespecting Azulon, Zuko and Azula and Ursa had the option to stay and so they did and Zuko and Azula (especially) are better for it, and so Iroh did all the good shit, opening up trade routes and rebuilding the nations and removing the laws that outlawed homosexuality

Aang is still found when Katara and Sokka are out fishing, but the village is being rebuilt, the men are home, and with the Northern Water Tribe’s help, the two tribes have pooled their resources and customs together to preserve the customs they have/had, but also listened to people like Yue, Sokka, and Katara to see what should be done/changed to help make the future better

The customs mean that Sokka and Katara now have the labels of Prince and Princess of the Southern Water Tribe, just like Yue

But the customs of arranged marriage and waterbending teachings are looser, so Katara is taught by Pakku, who marries their grandmother and they grow up with him as a grandfather

Kya is still dead, the last raid happened right before Iroh took the throne

Aang and Katara spent some time together, fell in love, have been together ever since

Yue and Sokka were engaged (and in love), until the moon thing happened; it happened bc Zhao was a follower of Ozai, and Ozai has gained a group of supporters who prefer Sozin’s, Azulon’s, and Ozai’s ways to that of Iroh’s - and Zhao snuck into the Northern Water Tribe and killed the fish, and Yue gave her life to save it

Sokka is devastated, and the Water Tribes are ready for war, but still hope for peace after so much devastation

Iroh, Hakoda, and Arnook meet to try and solve these things without war, and Iroh explains what happened in the past with Azulon and Ozai, and why the Northern Water Tribe was attacked

The three leaders decide that an all nations ball should be held, and that a union between the Fire Nation and the Water Tribes would be the best way to smooth things over, and to show solidarity

So its decided that either Katara or Sokka must marry Zuko or Azula

Katara is in love with Aang, and so Sokka knows he must be the one to marry into the Fire Nation Royal Family

He talks about this to katara, who thanks him like hell for not separating her and Aang (not that she expected him to, but it’s a relief)

Aang finds out and thanks him too, and tells him that as the Avatar and as the only representative for the Air Nation, hes been invited and that bc sokka is his family too he will smite Azula or Zuko if they hurt him

He knows Aang wouldn't hurt a fly (seriously, how is he a vegetarian in the freaking South Pole), but he appreciates that Aang and Katara will be there to watch his back

he’s not too upset about being the one to marry bc he knows his sister will be happy, but honestly hates that this is happening at all bc Yue is dead

katara and aang distract him from these thoughts by asking him wether he think’s he’ll be drawn to the prince or the princess (bc sokka is bi and both have known that for ages)

he’s not sure, say’s he’ll see

In the fire nation, Iroh talks to Ursa, and they both talk to Zuko and Azula

They dont know about Aang and Katara, so Zuko and Azula talk about both Katara and Sokka

Azula is still a bit manipulative, but is working on it, and Zuko trusts her enough to tell her that he hopes that he doesn’t have to marry the Southern Princess

Azula asks why, and Zuko admits he likes boys

Azula is silent for a bit, and then says that she hopes she wont have to marry either one of them because she, Ty Lee, and Mai are dating

Zuko swears that she won’t have to stop dating them, that he will be the one to marry

azula and ty lee and mai are v grateful and vow to back him up and kick water tribe ass if whichever one he marries hurts him

in other news, Suki is at the ball as Earth King Kuei’s plus one/bodyguard, and she and azula hit it off so Suki ends up eventually dating Mai and ty Lee and azula as well

back to our regularly scheduled program

Before the ball, Sokka is getting ready with Chief Arnook (Hakoda is getting ready with Bato bc they dating bc I said so)

Sokka says “i loved her, you know. And I will do this for our tribes, and even if I do learn to love whichever of them I’m to marry, I’m not sure I can ever stop loving her, and I want you to know that I did.”

And hes awkward about it, but Arnook hugs him, and says “She loved you so much, Sokka. And she would want you to be happy, as I’m sure you know.” Then he pulls back.

“I know we are technically two separate tribes, but I want you to know, I still consider you a son.” Sokka cries a little, and nods, happy that he has the blessing of the man who was supposed to be his father in law. Sokkas just happy that he can still have that, and smiles at Yue as she rises to look over the ball

Shes smiling cause she knows whats about to happen, and does indeed wish sokka to be happy as he can and will be

Hakoda and Bato come to wish Sokka good luck, bc Sokka and Katara and Aang already talked to them about how Katara and Aang intend to stay together,

Hakoda mentions how proud he is and sokka has to wipe a few tears from his eyes

Iroh and Ursa know the same thing about Zuko and Azula and Mai and Ty Lee, and both wish Zuko luck as well

Iroh makes sure to say how proud he is, and that Zuko is an honorable man

zuko def isnt crying, nope, but he wipes his tears away and carries on

So Azula and Katara are both planning on pushing Zuko and Sokka towards each other, but honestly there doesnt need to be any pushing

The ball attendees, excluding the royals of each Nation (and the Avatar), get to the ballroom, and the doors open for the royals (who are all announced by name), and of course everyone knows what the ball is for (security is quadrupled, from all the nations)

First comes Fire Lord Iroh, followed by Lady Ursa

Next comes in King Kuei

Next is Chief Arnook

Then Hakoda and Bato

Then Zuko and Azula

Then Aang

And lastly, Sokka and Katara

Zuko and Azula are standing by Iroh’s throne, and as the water tribe royals walk in, Sokka and Zuko make eye contact

And both are so smitten with each other

And at some point, it is asked that at least one of the young fire nation and water tribe royals dance together

And Zuko and Sokka look at each other and grasp each others hands and dance

its a slow waltz

And they just look so right together, the two princes

And they go out on the balcony and talk

Zuko says he wants to get to know sokka better, and sokka agrees

But is hesitant still, and asks zuko if he knows why the ball was happening

Zuko kinda shrugs, and says “there was an attack on the NWT, by firebenders loyal to my father, whos a huge asshole and im glad hes not on the throne. Uncle wanted to prove that hes not his brother, which leads to me having to marry, well, you.”

Sokka nods. “So they didn't tell you.”

“Tell me what?” Zuko asked, confused

“The attack on the NWT. The mission was to kill the moon spirit.” Zuko gasped, quickly checking that the full moon was in the sky, which it was. He knew what it meant, what would have happened to the waterbenders.

“They didn’t succeed, though, clearly.” He says, trying for comforting. Sokka laughed, harshly, without humor.

“They did, actually. Zhao - former Commander, now Admiral of Ozai’s followers - he killed it. My fiance, Princess Yue of the Northern Water Tribe, had a little bit of life from the moon spirit in her. To save us all, she decided to, according to her father, give it back.”

Sokka looks over to Zuko, who’s horrified

“So they’re expecting you to marry me? That’s kinda fucked up, especially if you loved her as much as it sounds like you do.”

Sokka nods. “Look, Zuko, I like you. I can tell already, I do. But,” and here he looks up at the moon, at Yue, “I will never stop loving her.” Looks back to Zuko “She will always have a part of me, and I need you to understand that if we’re supposed to marry each other.”

Zuko nods, understanding entirely. “It wasnt fair, and I would never ask you to stop loving her. I also can tell that I like you too, Sokka, and I’m willing to follow your lead on this. You clearly did love her, and I completely understand that you will continue to. I’m not…” Zuko takes a deep breath.

“I’m not going to ask you to betray your customs, your family, or any past love. I don’t want you to stop loving her, especially not when you clearly love her so much. And I’m willing to wait as long as you need and/or want to.”

Zuko’s nearly out of breath and hes being so honest it hurts, and Sokka’s crying a little so Zuko freaks out and thinks he said the wrong thing but Sokka is quick to reassure him that he said and did everything right

And they go back inside, together, and everyone looks at them, clearly expecting some kind of announcement here

And Sokka steps up, no longer teary eyed (mostly) and says: “I, Prince Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe, with blessings from both Water Tribes, ask for permission from the Fire Lord to court Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation.”

Hakoda, Bato, Arnook, Ursa, and Iroh are all by Iroh’s throne, and all of them step up. The guests had already parted the way. Katara and Azula are standing slightly to the side, but still nearby.

“I, Fire Lord Iroh, give permission to Prince Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe to court Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation, but only if Prince Zuko agrees to it.”

Both sokka and Zuko sigh in relief, smile, and nod at each other in agreement. Its Zuko’s turn to step up.

“I, Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation, agree to be courted by Prince Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe, with blessings from Fire Lord Iroh. I ask for permission from the Chiefs of both the Northern and Southern Water Tribes to court Prince Sokka.”

Hakoda and Arnook step up. Arnook speaks first. “I give my permission for Prince Sokka to be courted by Prince Zuko.” Hakoda is next. “I also give my permission for Prince Sokka to be courted by Prince Zuko, as long as Prince Sokka agrees to it.”

Sokka smiles at Zuko, and they hold hands to show solidarity between nations. And maybe bc they wanted to

Their sisters and (partners of said sisters) come up to them, smiling

Katara and Aang hug sokka, saying theyre proud of him, but also still thanking him

Azula punches sokka and says to be good to her big brother or else

Sokka says yes ma’am

Katara threatens Zuko, who also responds with a yes ma’am

Azula and Katara shake hands, which scares the ever living fuck out of everyone except Toph who laughs

Shes here bc shes a fuckin beifong

Aang trained with Pakku already (and katara of course) but has been looking for an earthbending teacher, and so convinces Toph to teach him bc bumi gave him the same advice here as in the show

Her parents aren’t entirely convinced, but Iroh offers to have the Beifongs stay (for business reasons, of course, winking at Aang and Toph), and that Toph will be safe here and can make new friends and future alliances between nations, which convinces them enough to agree to stay for a while

Sokka and Katara had to stay anyway of course, and Aang stays with Katara (and hey, wouldnt it be good if he could learn earth and firebending while at the palace), but everyone else went home

Shenanigans ensue

Zuko and sokka get closer as friends

And still really, really, really like each other

And of course theyre courting each other but soon they start like, dating dating

And fall in love

And live happily

Maybe Ozai tries to ruin their happiness but Toph punches him in his stupid face so its all good

#zukka #zukka fics #zuko #sokka

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margoshansons · 4 years

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Desperate Measures: 17/?

MASTERLIST

Summary: Y/N and Bellamy come across a survivor....and reunite with a familiar face.

Warnings: canon-typical violence, swearing, guns, gore

Notes: I am officially off of hiatus!! We will be back to our regularly scheduled programming soon enough, but I really wanted to post this today so enjoy! As always, I’m down to talk about any of it! Based on 2x04 “Many Happy Returns”

***

“Are we gonna talk about it?” Bellamy asked, dropping in next to her, his tone disapproving.

“Talk about what?” Y/N feigned innocence, really not wanting to discuss anything about what happened in the bunker. Bellamy pulled her aside, “You were ready to die for me.” He stated, hand growing tighter around her bicep, intense gaze never leaving her face.

She swallowed nervously, pushing down the butterflies fluttering as she ripped her arm out of his grasp, “Yes, I was.” She confirmed, moving forward so they didn’t fall behind. Bellamy chased after her, not wanting to end the conversation.

“I need to know why.” He pleaded, eyebrows raised, waiting for her answer.

She sighed annoyingly before dropping the bomb, “You’re more important than me.” She stated as if they were discussing the weather instead of their self-worth. “You’re a better leader, a better tracker, and you keep the rest of us grounded.” She began to explain, “You’re older, and have more experience, it’s simple logic.”

This time his grip refused to let up, grasping her wrist and turning her toward him so she could see the desperation hidden in his gaze. “That’s not true.” His voice cracked, throat bobbing up and down as he scanned her face, “The grounders respect you, you’re the best engineer we have--”

“Had” Y/N corrected, her mind wandering toward Sinclair, “The Ark’s down now. There’s plenty more engineers.”

“And you’re a damn good leader.” Bellamy continued to press, refusing to let her believe that her life was worthless. “I may keep the rest of the hundred grounded, but you keep me grounded.” He confessed, breath hitching as they moved closer. “I need you alive.”

Y/N threw her gaze up, sighing at the unfairness of her own words thrown back in her face. “That’s not fair,” She joked, playing with Bellamy’s fingers as they stood on the edge of a clearing, hoping Finn knew what he was doing.

“Are we finally taking a break?”

The couple inhaled sharply as Murphy’s voice interrupted their moment. Just as the two of them were about to answer, Finn cut them off. “No breaks.” The Spacewalker said, eyes still trained on the map, “We have to keep moving.”

Y/N moved forward, “Look,” She pleaded with her former friend, “I know you want to find them, I do too. But we need a minute or we won’t be in good enough shape to rescue our friends.”

Finn finally took his eyes off the makeshift atlas to meet her own, a snarl curled on his face, “No we don’t.” His gaze turned to Bellamy’s, “You heard the grounder, ‘they’ll outlive their usefulness’ we need to keep moving.”

Bellamy stepped in front of the anxious kid, “Y/N’s right,” He told Finn, hand pressed against the other kid’s chest, “Besides, you had a gun to his head, who knows if he was telling the truth.”

She stood there watching the two go at it, trying to find a peaceful way to resolve the tension when she heard it. A slight buzzing in her ear.

“Guys be quiet,” Y/N ordered, training her ear toward the buzzing, trying to discover the direction it was coming in, “Do you hear that?” “Hear what?” Bellamy asked, brows furrowing.

“I think your girlfriend’s gone crazy” Murphy sneered, a glare from Y/N thrown his way.

She followed the buzzing until they broke through the thicket of trees, the road beginning again as they found themselves near the edge of a cliff. But the fear creeping up inside her wasn’t because of the height.

Thousands of Arkers lay before her, the flies picking off what nutrients they could from their decomposing bodies, creating the buzzing that had drawn her here. Their crimson blood splattered against the tan ground, creating a grotesque painting that each delinquent viewed in horror as they moved through the clump of dead bodies.

When they reached the edge of the cliff she held up her hand, telling the rest of them not to go any further.

“Now we know why we never heard from Factory Station.” Bellamy stated numbly, a hint of sadness developing in his voice as the group stared at the debris in front of them.

“Rough landing” Murphy muttered and Y/N glared at the insensitive delinquent, her hand brushing against Bellamy’s arm.

Finn joined them on the edge, “There’s nothing we can do for these people.” The emotionless tone from earlier had returned and despite every bone in her body screaming otherwise, Y/N found herself agreeing with the now murderer.

Their footsteps were cut off by a scream coming from the bottom of the cliff, Bellamy stopping the group again, “Did you hear that?” Something akin to hope returned in his eyes as they peered over the edge, catching sight of a lone figure hanging onto a tree branch jutting out of the cliff, her feet swinging wildly.

There was a survivor.

“Please!” The voice called, female, “Help me!” Sterling joined the leaders at the edge of the cliff, “Mel?” He asked, disbelief written across his face.

“Sterling! Help me please!” Mel called, her voice desperate.

Finn stopped Sterling from grabbing his pack, turning toward Bellamy. “We can’t stop.”

Sterling pushed past Finn and looked back down at Mel.

“This isn’t a grounder Finn,” Y/N pointed out, her voice growing hard, “We have a rope. We can save her.”

“We can save our friends!” Finn countered, the anger coming back to play. “The longer we wait, the less we can save.”

Y/N wanted to scream in frustration, “We don’t know if our friends are still alive!” She finally brought up, knowing it was on everyone’s minds. Finn went silent. “What we do know is that there is someone here who needs our help.”

Finn looked about ready to snap, his lips thinning at her argument. The sound of rocks clattering caused the three of them to swivel around, catching Sterling’s blonde hair disappearing behind the cliff edge.

“Sterling what are you doing?” Bellamy asked, running forward, getting there much too late as Murphy joined the trio at the edge.

“Looks like we’re taking that break after all.”

Bellamy and Y/N shot another glare at Murphy and she watched his eyes widen at the synchronicity of the two leaders before they turned their gaze back to Sterling’s heroics, holding their breaths as he began to creep closer to the ledge that Mel was holding onto.

“I’m almost there!” He shouted up, “Once I have her pull us up!” A sigh came from Murphy and the trio as they released their breaths in relief.

“Well I’d say he’s heard one to many of your motivational speeches,” Murphy joked, relieving some of the tension.

“Shut up Murphy,” Bellamy responded, his eyes never leaving Sterling’s frame.

Y/N’s gaze moved from Sterling to the quivering rope beside her, watching anxiously as it began to shake more until she caught the rock the rope was tied to. The knot flew apart and her eyes grew wide. She jumped on the rope, trying fruitlessly to wrap the edge around her hand, only to watch in horror as it slipped from underneath her, sliding off the cliff and sending Sterling to his death.

His scream rang in her ears, only silenced by a smack as he fell limply against the ground.

Her breathing was ragged, muffled sounds unable to pierce through the cotton like substance in her ears as she replayed Sterling’s screams over and over in her mind, replaying it like the music Marcus used to play.

Suddenly, another scream entered her ears, Mel’s screams.

“We need to figure something else out.” Maria uttered, shaking herself out of her stupor. She owed it to Sterling. She owed it to Mel.

“We’re out of rope.” Finn spoke matter of factly and she knew what he was trying to do.

“So we make a new one” Y/N pushed, sending a small look toward Monroe, the other girl tensing up.

Finn moved closer, invading her space, “We don’t have time. We can come back to her after we save our friends.”

Bellamy exploded. “We don’t know if we could save our friends!” He moved closer to Finn the two men continuing their argument from earlier, “We’ve all thought it. But, Y/N was right, we can save this one girl.”

Finn clenched his jaw, sending a dirty look the engineer’s way before moving closer to Bellamy, “Just because the person you love is safe--”

Bellamy tilted his head, mouth tightening in anger, “I would be very careful with what you say next.”

Monroe stepped in beside the two leaders, “Sterling died to save her, and I’m not leaving until we do.” She spoke, determination hiding whatever grief she was feeling. “How do we do it?”

“We make rope from the wreckage,” Y/N pulled her gaze away from the two silent men, sliding into leader mode, “Seatbelts, wires, anything you can find.”

Murphy and Monroe nodded, the three of them going off to craft a new rope that was going to save Mel’s life. It had to.

***

“I’ll be fine.” Bellamy assured her, pulling tightly on the makeshift rope to make sure it was secure. “You made it.”

Y/N chuckled slightly to break through the unnerving feeling that something was going to go wrong. “You better make it back alive.” She told him, squeezing his hand as she joined the assembly line to lower him down, Murphy and her holding the front of the rope, watching anxiously as Bellamy lowered himself down.

The seatbelts cut through the skin of her palms, the knots in her stomach weighing her down. She hoped it actually added physical weight as well. She didn’t like this one bit, and she couldn’t shake the feeling that something awful was going to happen.

As soon as Mel latched onto Bellamy her prophecy came true.

A buckling sensation sent her lurching forward, the momentum threatening to send her flying off the cliff interrupted by a pair of hands wrapping themselves around her waist, pulling her backward as their feet slid against the rocky cliffside.

“Don’t worry Sparky” Murphy’s strained voice entered her ears, moving his hands from her waist to the rope, “You’ll get your chance to kill me.”

The two of them pulled, Monroe and Finn joining the pair, the four of them trying as hard as possible to keep Bellamy and Mel from falling.

“What the hell happened up there?” Bellamy’s voice rang up from cliffside, and Y/N forced herself to look down, the two Factory station residents swinging helplessly as he tried to find a placement for his foot.

Something buzzed past Y/N’s head and she turned just in time to see an arrow land inches from her.

“Grounders!” She heard Finn yell, “Take cover!” Monroe reached over to grasp her gun, leaning on one knee to protect the trio trying to lift up Bellamy and Mel to safety.

“Everybody pull!” Y/N shouted, having enough faith in Monroe to focus on the task at hand. The seatbelts burned against her palms, and the sweat dripping down her back refused to let up, even as the sun disappeared behind the clouds.

A scream pulled Y/N away from Bellamy as she watched Monroe collapse to the ground, gripping an arrow that had embedded itself deep in her thigh. She released her grip on the rope, grasping the gun in earnest.

“Get back on the rope,” She ordered Monroe, “Now!”

Y/N stood her ground, raising the scope to her eye, recalling Marcus’ lessons.

She pushed another magazine in, locking her eye on the trees above her, bullets striking true as grounders began to fall forward, the arrows slowly dissipating.

Except they weren’t.

Instead it felt as if she was battling an endless hydra. Whenever one fell, two more seemed to be there to greet her in their place. They only had so much ammo, and she knew they were running out soon.

It was only the sound of a foghorn that saved her.

She turned toward the thicket, searching for the familiar yellow orange clouds that could kill them at any second. Instead she found herself locking eyes with a familiar pair of green ones, a wide smile on their savior’s face.

“Octavia?” She breathed.

The two girls collapsed into each other, unable to believe that they were here together. That they had finally found each other.

Their reunion was nothing compared to the relieved one between her and her brother. The siblings refused to pull apart, almost as if they were afraid the other would disappear if they did.

“Where’s your boyfriend?” Murphy asked, the atmosphere growing sour as soon as he made any mention of Lincoln.

Octavia froze, and Y/N caught her gaze as she helped tie up Mel’s arm. “He’s gone,” the younger sister replied curtly, tying off Monroe’s leg as she held the arrow up to her vision.

Bellamy moved toward her, a regretful look on his face, “I’m sorry O,” He uttered, unsure about how to comfort his sister.

Pain shot up Y/N’s side as she stood back up, her knee buckling underneath her as Bellamy moved to catch her, setting her down on the same boulder Mel was on moments before.

“I’m fine.” She lied through her teeth, clutching onto her hip.

Bellamy shook his head, a smile reaching his eyes as she continued to deny her own injuries. “God, it’s a good thing we’re both stubborn as hell.” He muttered, untying the fresh bandages to glance at the wound.

The two of them stared in horror at the sight of blood staining the gauze, and a few stitches tugging at the skin, fraying as one popped open.

She almost thought she saw regret cross Murphy’s face.

“We need to get you back to camp.” Bellamy announced, “And don’t even think about trying to argue with me.”

This time it was her turn to smirk, “I wasn’t...dad” She threw in his face, biting her lip to stop her smile from growing any wider. “But you’re going with Finn and Murphy,” She whispered, her smile replaced by something more serious.

“No way,” Bellamy shook his head, not wanting to leave her, “I’m not leaving you alone.”

“You said it yourself,” Y/N inhaled sharply, “Finn’s a loose cannon, so is Murphy, you need to keep an eye on them.”

Bellamy shook his head, refusing to agree with her, “I just got you back, and I promised myself I’d never let you out of my sight again. Especially after you got injured. I’d never forgive myself.”

Silence stood between the two leaders as they examined each other’s faces, gazes locking onto the bottom half of the other’s face. The gap threatening to close.

Her chest constricted as the words ran themselves over and over in her head.

I need you alive.

She nodded her head slightly, turning her gaze toward Murphy before chucking her rifle at him. “Shoot me again, and I’ll kill you” She breathed heavily, a playful look in her eyes as she extended the olive branch between them. Murphy caught the gun, a smirk playing on his lips as he gave her a mock salute, following Finn into the bushes.

“Let’s go home.” She smiled, tilting her head up to meet Octavia and Bellamy’s gaze, the two siblings nodded.

She hoped she did the right thing.

***

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