#paxton x ben

[doyelikehaggis]

I’m only just now catching up on season 3 & 4 of Never Have I Ever, and Paxton just immediately picking Ben up when he says he needs to go to hospital and carrying him out bridal style was Beautiful.

[blues-valentine]

Devi Vishwakumar is one of the best main female characters and I will deeply miss her.

I love how unapologetically messy and chaotic she was. It was a wild ride seeing her make some questionable decisions. It was great to see a woman of color allowed to be messy and entangled in romantic affairs. It was amazing to see Tamil representation and how it focuses on family relationships and how difficult it is to handle cultural and generational differences. Ultimately, NHIE is about a teenager navigating grief and such a traumatic event. Devi and Nalini’s relationship was extremely complicated but perfectly illustrates how difficult it is to raise your kid when you have been raised differently so seeing their relationship grow and evolve to such tender and supportive bond was such a beautiful journey to have witnessed.

Devi was messy, cringey, confused, frustrating but also funny, driven, smart, kind and deeply human. She was allowed to make mistakes and try again until she figures it out. Her growth this season was so brilliant to see and she’s going to make many more mistakes in the future but already has such great support system in her life. Has learned to value herself and her worth. I love she got to have her romantic ending, her dream school and loved for all of her messiness.

I will miss Devi and every character in NHIE, as a show is definitely one I will rewatch multiple times and I cannot wait to see what Maitreyi does with her future because she’s brilliant.

[newrcgime]

"how about you tell me to fuck and mean it? i can tell when you're lying, one of my many abilities." paxton hummed, poking ben in the stomach softly with his toes. "and how many times have i caught you staring at my ass?" the fairy quipped back, edges of his lips curved into a subtle smirk, studying the older mans features. he'd be lying if he said he wasn't very attracted to ben, because he was. he had been since one of the first times he'd seen him, it was one of the few reasons paxton came around so often, why else would he wanna be on a farm? "or did you think i didn't notice all the times you eye fucked me? you're not very subtle."

Ben rolled his eyes. “You say that like I haven’t told you to fuck off before, yet here you are, still hanging around.” He raised an eyebrow as Paxton rested his legs on his. Although made no attempt to push or kick them off. The younger man had become something of a fixture in the Kingston household, carving out a soft spot in Ben’s otherwise cold, aloof heart. It was clear Paxton had a bit of a crush on Ben, which explained why he teased him so often—Ben had to have his fun, too. “I literally live here, and you’re my little brother’s best friend. Not like I have a choice. Besides, how many times have you ‘accidentally’ walked in on me showering or changing?”

[harmonizingsunsets]

when your love languages are both banter and validation

[livelovecaliforniadreams]

[livelaughsmut]

Ethan Morales One-shot

warnings: just smut fr‼️‼️‼️

I walked into the science lab because i left my textbook, as i look up i see ethan. damn he seems hotter everytime i see him.

“sup y/n” he said with a smirk on his face

“sup ethan what are you doing?” i said anxiously because just his presence made

me nervous.

i have liked ethan since we were young and we’ve definitely made out at a few house parties but i always was yearning for more than that.

“well i was about to skip my next class. what are you doing?” he looks me up and down and licks his lips. i could just pass out, i want him so bad.

“i just needed to grab my textbook” i stepped toward the lab table and began to pick my textbook up but ethan pushed it back down on the stack of books it was resting on. i looked at him confused. he put a finger under my chin and looked me deep in the eyes.

“i think maybe you should skip class with me” he starts tracing my jawline.

i gulp hard. “that’s bad, i’m trying to get a scholarship” ethan pulled away and walked towards the door closing it and locking it.

“one class won’t kill you” he says walking back to me. he puts his hand on the small of my back and pulls me close to him. he leans forward and whispers in my ear “i know deep down you like to be bad” i exhale slowly and put my hands on the back of his neck. he starts kissing down my neck and i gasp, i feel his smile on my skin.

i pull his shirt over his head and he is quick to help me take it off. he knocks all the books of the lab table and picks me up and puts me on it. he kisses me deeply and he pulls my tank top over my head and starts kissing down my boobs. he continues kissing down my stomach until he gets to the top of my jean shorts. he looks up at me while he’s practically on his knees and starts unbuttoning my shorts.

he pulls my shorts off my legs and starts kissing my thighs. it doesn’t take him long before he pulls down my panties and starts kissing my clit. he starts licking slowly and i gasp. i can just feel his amusement as he starts eating me out and i can’t help but start moaning super loud. “fuck ethan!!!” any other guy would prefer to not get caught but ethan doesn’t care.

i lock my fingers in his hair as he enters his fingers inside of me. my mouth hangs open and i am breathing heavily. i’m so close to cumming and ethan can tell by the way i’m clenching his fingers. he quickly pulls away and i get pissed.

“what the fuck” i sit up staring at him.

“i just wanna be fucking you while you cum” he says as he’s unbuckling his belt. he quickly pulls down his boxers and im shocked by his size. like actually shocked. he opens his condom with his teeth and puts it on. he steps forward and lines his dick up with my pussy. he starts rubbing my clit with his tip and i feel so on the edge i need him to fuck me.

i grab onto his back and pull him closer and he finally slides into me.

“fuck” i yell so loudly that someone had to have heard me.

he starts sliding in and out of me and i cant keep my composure. i start uncontrollably moaning and he starts groaning in my ear. it’s so hot. he picks up his pace and starts rubbing my clit with his thumb.

“im gonna cum oh my god” i scratch his back and he just keeps going faster.

“fuck fuck fuck” he says in my ear. “y/n im so close”

“me too” im holding onto him for dear life as he fucks the shit out of me.

i cum all over his dick and he cums inside the condom.

we’re both panting and are stuck in place. he pulls out of me and leans forward and kisses me deeply.

i pull away and our noses are touching and i can feel his breath on my face as i say “maybe i do like being bad”

he smiles “yeah you do” and starts kissing me again.

[ethanmorales]

Misconceptions

All Parts Now Posted - Masterlist

Part 1 - Ablaze

Pairing: Ethan Morales x reader 1.3k words Tags: make out, angst Warning: swearing

My fingers grazed against his chest and as I let my hand wander down his torso, I felt every muscle under twitch in anticipation. I looked up at his face and he was already looking at me with a mixture of lust and longing.

“I missed you,” he whispered.

Oh and I missed him. For what other reason would I have climbed through his window at 2:12 in the morning?

But I didn’t say it back. That’s what got us into this mess in the first place. Me caring. Me wanting him so bad it hurt. Me falling while he was always just having a good time.

“Babe?”

I looked up at him, pulled out of my thoughts by his inquiring tone.

“Just kiss me,” I demanded.

He only hesitated for two seconds, just briefly enough for his brown eyes to send a silent question, “everything okay?” But his mouth never asked; it was too busy connecting with mine in a blazing kiss that threatened to consume me, him, both of us together.

Everything was on fire. Everywhere he touched. Everywhere he kissed. My skin burned with his touch and for it. We barely paused for breath as he laid me down on his bed. He unlinked our mouths long enough to grab the hem of my shirt and help me out of it. Then we lit up again.

I glided my fingers in the soft waves of his hair as his mouth found the spot where my neck meets my shoulder. His teeth gently grazed against the skin, just enough for me to feel the pressure but not enough to cause pain and then his tongue followed. He started trailing downward to my chest with that same technique.

"Ethan." It was a half-whispered moan. I say half whispered because it was not as quiet as I intended it to be.

At his name, he looked up at me, smiling that damning adorable smile of his and placed a finger over my lips.

"My parents' sleep next door."

He was better at whispering than I was. Probably had more experience at this kind of clandestine middle of the night type of encounter. Before the bitter thought took full effect in my head, his mouth clashed against mine in another fiery kiss. Almost like he wanted to distract me from my own thoughts.

It was working.

The kiss that started like a flame scorching through us with intensity and desperation, simmered down into a heart wrenching slower tempo. Our mouths molded together, his tongue slow danced with mine in perfect unison... and I was lost.

Lost to the sweet taste of his lips. Lost to the movement of his pelvis against mine and the calculated motions building up the fire that he had awoken in me. Though we still had enough clothing separating us from the fusing of our bodies, it didn't dampen the ever-present ache within me.

With the way he touched me, you would think he felt the same.

So, I was lost. Lost in the depths of longing. Longing for this guy that could never ever reciprocate such feeling in return.

I pushed away from him as abruptly as I had the thought. I was met by a look that someone that didn't know him would think is concern. But I knew better.

"I have to go." My words practically a mumble.

"What?" he seemed disoriented in a way, his eyes searching for something in mine that I didn't want him to find.

"It's late," I said, "If we wake up your parents, they'll disown you for real this time."

Ethan's eyes though still confused, hid partially away by the appearance of his mischievous smile, "So what? They've disowned me like 50 times already. Just this year."

I rolled my eyes.

"You say that with so much pride," I whispered, simultaneously pulling myself out of his grasping hands. I heard him groan in protest behind me as I pulled my shirt over my head.

"Because the shit they say doesn't mean anything. They think that by acting like they're disappointed in me, I'll just magically turn into the son they always wanted. It's bullshit."

I shook my head at this rant and turned to face him. He had gotten up from the bed as well and was less than two feet away from me.

"If you really didn't care, you wouldn't' have shushed me earlier. But God knows you're too cool to admit to caring about anything so I'm not having this argument with you." I sounded defeated. He noticed the change in my tone immediately, his eyes narrowed.

"Why do we have to argue at all? There are way more fun things that we could be doing right now." Even as he said it, I could see that he didn't mean it. Something in his expression closed off at my previous comment.

"I have to be up early anyways," I said gently.

"Sure. Whatever." He walked towards his window. I followed behind until we were in front of it.

I looked up at him. He didn't seem to want to look me in the eye as he avoided my gaze. I gave up.

"Okay. I'll see you around then."

My voice was small, and I hated myself for it. This is where we end up every time. I understand that he has never claimed to be anything but who I've always known him to be, but can you blame me for wanting more? I'm only human. And I know... that's it's wrong that I want him to change for me. I should be accepting him as he is or staying away from him, but I can't. The harder I try, the easier it is for me to end up here with him. Stuck in this goddamn tragic loop of ours.

I shake my head to myself and throw a leg over the windowsill. As I push myself out and my feet touch the freshly cut grass of his backyard, I thank God he lives in a one-story home.

When I turn to close his bedroom window, he stops me with a hand over mine. I move mine away and he frowns. He proceeds to climb out of his window.

"What?" I ask, unable to keep the edge out of my voice. I was already too emotionally drained to hide my upset.

He blinks with confusion. "What am I doing wrong?"

I huff but say nothing.

He sighs, "How do I stop upsetting you if you won't tell me what it is that you're upset about?"

I snap. "You. You are the reason I'm upset!"

His eyes widen, "What about me? "

I want to tell him. I want to tell him everything. All the things he makes me feel; good and bad. My fears. My thoughts. But I can't. Because I know what he will say.

"I didn't sign up for this".

"We had a deal."

"Don't start getting clingy."

I've heard it all come out of his mouth before. Not with me. With the many girls I've seen him with. But still. I refuse to make the mistakes the rest of them did. I will never admit that I had fallen for him. Not now. Not ever.

I held his gaze for a second, but his beautiful brown eyes made my poor heart flutter uncomfortably in my chest. I look away.

"Nothing, sorry. I really gotta go. I get cranky when I don't sleep."

I start turning around to leave, but then feel his arm snake around my waist and pull me in against him, leaving no space between us.

I look up at him in a question. His eyes scanned my face for something, though I'm not sure what.

"Liar."

That's all he says before his mouth crashes over mine.

I didn't want it. The rational part of me knew that I should back off and walk away. But as soon as his tongue invades my mouth, the heat of our flame sears through my whole being... and we're back to where we started.

To be continued...

__________________________________

A/N: Haven't written in ages. But after watching season 4 of Never Have I Ever.... I had to. My goodness, Ethan got me feeling all kinds of things lol. Made a new blog just to write this without judgement. Let me know if you want a part 2. I feel like this might deserve another part. Or maybe I can turn it into a series? Let me know if you liked it and I'll write more :)

Update: will be doing a part two! Maybe 3... we shall see :D

[gredandforgeweatherby]

Forget About Him

Ben Gross x reader

WC: 858 Warnings: Swearing? Takes place during the dance in 2x10. Reader has envious/jealous feelings towards Devi, but no Devi hate

Ben was walking through the hall when he heard a sniffle. Confused, he poked his head into the nearby classrooms before finally spotting you in one. You were sitting at a random desk, dress flowing uncomfortably around your body in the same space between the table and your body. Your makeup had tear tracks through it, your mascara running down slightly with the tears that stained your face. Your face was warm and a bit splotchy from crying, your nose red.

If you had been in a more normal state of mind, you would have been upset that the person who found you was Ben. You and Ben had a slightly complicated relationship, sometimes being friendly while other times it seemed the two of you couldn’t hate each other more. It was different from him and Devi’s relationship; their relationship thrived on academic rivalry and one upping each other with insults. It seemed like when you and Ben were in a hate stage, you two genuinely hated each other. Though, the hate was one sided on your part, but you didn’t know that.

Ben slowly walked into the class, cautious of the fact that you could start yelling at him for talking to you while you were in this state.

“Y/n?” He asked cautiously. You looked up, confused as to why Ben was here as you weren’t expecting him. “What’s going on? What happened?” He walked over to you, sitting in the desk next to you, his eyes never leaving yours.

“Nothing, it’s stupid.” You said, looking away, “You’ll probably laugh at and insult me so.”

Ben was hurt that you’d think he would make fun of something that was making you so upset, but as he always played along with your “I hate you game”, he understood why you’d think that.

“Y/n, I’m not gonna laugh at you, or-or insult you.” He said gently, making you look back to him, “Seriously, what’s going on?”

You took a deep breath before speaking. “I got played. You know, I thought that someone wanted me when they didn’t and it sucks.”

Ben nodded, knowing how that felt. He decided to tell you about his experience to try and make you feel better about your own.

“Well, uh, I’ve been played too. Yeah you know, Devi played Paxton and I at the same time so, I know how you feel. And you’re right, it does suck.”

“Yeah I knew about that,” You said, nodding your head, “I’m sorry she did that. It’s shitty.”

Ben agreed with you, nodding his head when a quiet “yeah” slipped past his lips.

“I thought he liked me. He said he did so much and always would make me feel so… wanted and then he ditched me for someone else.”

“Look, whoever it is and whoever they ditched your for, forget about them alright?”

“It was Paxton. He ditched me for Devi, after he told me he wasn’t interested in Devi. She double times him and he wants her, I mean what does she have that I don’t?”

“Nothing y/n,” Ben shook his head, leaning his elbows on his legs to get closer to you, “there is nothing that Devi has that you don’t. You’re beautiful and smart and funny and really witty, trust me I’d know. Paxton played you and yeah, it sucks and it hurts, I know, but don’t think that it happened because of you. It’s his loss y/n, seriously.”

You looked over at Ben, sniffling. He was right, and somewhere in you you knew it.

“Thanks Ben. You actually made me feel a lot better.” A laugh slipped past your lips.

Ben chuckled too, “Yeah I often have that effect on people.” He said, smiling.

“You know if I had found you in this position I probably would have made fun of you. It wouldn’t be every day you see Ben Gross crying during a dance, so.”

He laughed, looking down for a second before meeting your eyes again. “I know.”

“But I’m glad you kept your word and didn’t make fun of me. It means a lot.”

“Of course.” He nodded. Suddenly he stood up, placing his hand out to you. “Come on.”

You stared at him questioningly.

“We are gonna clean your makeup up and then we’re going back to the dance, and you are going to forget all about Paxton and Devi and anything else that would make you upset, and you are going to have a great time. Maybe you’ll even save a dance for me.” He smiled at you.

You couldn’t hold back your smile as you stood, grabbing his hand.

He led you to the bathroom and waited outside while you tried to salvage your makeup through your tears, then walked back to the dance with you.

You and Ben danced all night together, getting along better than anyone had ever seen. That was the first night you began looking at Ben Gross in a different light, the first night he gave you butterflies. Ben, on the other hand, savored that night, not knowing how long the bliss between the two of you would last.

Good thing for him, that bliss never seemed to go away.

[awesomechocolatesauce]

"If I were Devi, I would've picked Paxton."

Well, you're not Devi. She didn't love Paxton and she moved on from him.

Paxton didn't pick her, either. He moved on from her.

Ben never moved on from Devi. Devi never moved on from Ben. They dated other people to distract themselves from each other, but they were always drawn to each other.

In the end, there wasn't a choice. There was only Ben for Devi and Devi for Ben. You don't have to like it, but that's how it is.

[joskyoung]

the amount of ben gross fanfics there AREN’T is disgusting and i’ll be waiting for u all to write them. thanks.

[mellarkably]

decided to lay out a few theories that have been solidified for me after watching the trailer!

1) nirmala is getting married. according to an article she has a love interest this season, someone who makes sandwiches, and considering all three vishwakumar girls are sitting on the side for the wedding, i think it’s basically confirmed. also, it’s supposed to be unexpected. can’t think of anything else more unpredictable than pati giving love another chance.

2) the ethan storyline will fizzle out by 405, 406 or 407 maximum. apparently, according to the writers, he has quite a temper, a classic bad boy of sorts. i assume he has something to do with the crude vandalism written on devi’s car after they break up.

3) paxton will give university a chance and decide it’s not for him in 403. i wouldn’t consider this as being regressive, as uni is not the path for everyone. he will work as a swim coach and advisor back at sherman oaks, therefore bringing him back into the love triangle (and also making things easier for the writers to keep him in the story).

also, #trexton4life.

4) ben and margot break up early on. due to the still of ben and margot below, i theorize devi may accidentally start a scene during this, and bring attention to their conversation. how? i’m not sure. 

i’ve never pegged margot to be the type of girl who tolerates any level of bullshit. so i don’t doubt she’ll take herself out of the relationship if there is ex mess involved. either way, don’t think they’re lasting in any way shape or form. mildly sucks because i loved her friendship with ben in s3 but whatever

5) ben and devi will not be on talking terms until 405. regarding why they’re still icing each other out, i’m assuming whatever incident happens in theory 4 above is why ben appears to be ignoring devi, and she is equally mad at him. the still below is from 403.

they patch things up during 405, specifically the scene at the bar when ben sees devi being harassed (?) and helps her out. maybe we’ll get a moment of devi icing ben’s bruise while they finally reconcile. they will NOT get together romantically this early, but will be back on bestie terms. refer to most of s3 benvi for dynamic.

6) eleanor pursues acting in new york and succeeds, which may drive a wedge into her relationship with trent. however, they will last. i also have a slight suspicion this is an eleanor pov episode.

she might also run into her mother due to that scene in the teaser where she is very visibly upset in the same outfit.

7) swimming will be the connection between devi and paxton, as maybe devi gives it another try. she’s said to be in her speedos in a leak during the middle of the season which i assume means she’ll join the swim team again.

this still below is in 407. they might have a moment of rekindling romance here. however, considering how different devi and paxton’s paths are and also the fact that he is now a staff member and she is a student, it doesn’t quite make sense for them to work out realistically or enter a relationship, more on that later. won’t make any guesses further than that, though.

8) devi, fab, and el will not make it to prom. the car crashes. they’re sitting on it while it’s night. that insinuates that they either make it very late or not at all.

9) ben climbs through devi’s window after prom to comfort her. he knows very well how much prom has meant to devi since they were kids and probably understands how much this must suck for devi. he’s also not in a suit which may mean he also could not go to prom. i won’t speculate the reason but it could be related to the altercation at the club if it was during a school field trip, maybe not. either way, they will finally have a proper conversation about their feelings. 

however a) i don’t think they will say their i love you’s here but either way, b) i have a slight feeling they might have sex, this time doing it because they feel it’ll work out and out of love, without any sort of miscommunication. the awkwardness from 401 will not be there post coital antics.

there is also the chance that this entire scene is a dream. i wouldn’t put that past the show because ben has never been the type to climb through devi’s window. however, it is sweet considering how willing ben is to step out of his comfort zone when it comes to her, so i choose to believe it’s real for narrative sense.

10) ben and devi have some sort of prom retry in 410, maybe in the last few minutes of the show, and their final love confessions happen here. the last scene maitreyi and jaren filmed was in a library, and she had a corsage on her wrist after wrapping. as mentioned before, attending prom meant a lot to devi and ben knows of this fact. as for the place, probably their college library, assuming they both go to the same place for post secondary education.

EDIT: it's also possible the library scene is a timeskip into the future. we shall see.

shows do film out of order, and the corsage could have been unrelated to onscreen plot. so as of right now, it’s just speculation

it is important to note that i do not want to assume who is endgame, as i try not to set any expectations. but personally, i don’t understand how devi and paxton would work from here if devi is going to university and paxton is staying at sherman oaks. her future seems to align with ben’s more. writing wise, and just logically, it would make more sense.

anyway, if i think of any more i’ll add them! thanks for entertaining my delusions ideas.

[sharkboy305]

One of the main reasons I'm a multi Shipper is because you can't just give me these types of ships and expect me to only choose one.

[blues-valentine]

The thing is, Paxton was a great first boyfriend for Devi but it was never meant to be. He represents a different Devi, the high school part of her that wanted to fulfill dreams for external validation. Dreams that she has simply outgrow and she can allow herself to admit that now because her dreams have evolved. In another life, one in which Devi didn’t idealize him, maybe they could’ve worked but Devi was not in love with Paxton. She was attracted to a romanticized idea of him. That’s always been the problem with their relationship, the fact she always saw him as a symbolic dream, her rise to popularity — a thing she thought would give her the self love and normalcy she craved. Once she dated him, lost him, got over him, got to do some evolving herself, and was able to date outside of her bubble, her feelings for him weren’t there anymore simply because they were not longer under those rose colored lenses. She was able to recognize what has been there the whole time. Devi wasn’t longing for Paxton. Not in the ways she has longed for Ben, because the Paxton she wanted was someone she made up in her head. And Ben has always been the real deal for her. Her nemesis, her academic rival, her friend, her ex, her boyfriend. Devi, just like Paxton, deserve someone that makes you feel all the emotions, all the stomach knots and that crazy passion.

As Devi said, Paxton was a good boyfriend, but a much better friend to her. I like their closure. I like that they were able to cherish the influence in each other's lives while moving into new things for them. Things that are better suited for what they want from life. Not all relationships are meant to be and that doesn't diminish it.

Then there’s Ben. If anything showed this season is that she loves him irrevocably, with all his good thing and bad qualities too. And Ben despite all his dumbness this season, he loves Devi. There's no one else for him. He could date all the cool girls and Devi would still be the one for him. They’re the type of love Trent described on Season 3. “We rile each other up and then we love each other.” Ben and Devi are soulmates. They fit in a way that they appreciate each other's drive, weirdness and unattractive qualities. Devi is so herself with him and Ben was never a fantasy, he was a very tangible person that has a lot of flaws and a lot of that grow (for her and Ben) had to be individual before coming together. And they'll continue growing together.

The romantic themes of the show have always been very clear. It's about what Devi thinks she needs to be normal vs the things she will realize she wants and fullfills her. She got all of the things she wanted in the pilot, the difference is that pilot Devi asked for those things to satisfy an external filter but she not longer craves that because she has grown. Devi ended the show happy and fulfilled with her life, in her dream school, comfortable with herself, her culture. Devi could've perfectly ended up alone and that would have been totally okay too but Devi loves love and I'm happy she got exactly that.

[fishyyyyy99]

OK, I seriously can't believe someone actually thinks this about season 4 of Never Have I Ever:

"In 2023, the message of the show suddenly turned into *"racism, white supremacy, patriarchy, and class inequity doesn't exist anymore. Devi did a Bollywood dance, got into Princeton, and a racist white guy said he loves her at the last minute, so everything is going to be okay (for Gen Z)."*

This is the opposite of the premise that the show started with in 2020, which acknowledged the brutal unfairness in the world."

Firstly, it wasn't a Bollywood dance. They danced to the Tamil dubbed version of a song that is originally Telugu. Tamil cinema is known as Kollywood, and Telugu cinema is known as Tollywood. Maybe people who comment so much on racism should learn a little more about not clubbing all of Indian culture together. As a Telugu woman who lives in Tamil Nadu, I'd like to say that I was really happy with the dance number. I was especially happy because it wasn't a Bollywood dance (season 1 just used Hindi songs, and that really annoyed me because Devi is Tamil).

The show literally acknowledged that Devi ("our little hothead from the valley") was happy in that moment. There was no claim about everything being okay forever. It's just that she is better equipped to deal with problems now. She will continue to grow non-linearly, just like she did throughout the show.

Of course, the show became less about dealing with intense grief as it went on - time heals. But they did portray that grief still lingers, despite that.

Also, the portrayal of familial relationships was great - Devi talking about how it's cool to live with three generations of women in her house, Nalini having to deal with empty nest syndrome, Nalini talking about her own struggle with having to start over in the US after being a top resident in India (but of course, the last season does not acknowledge how brutally unfair the world is /s) and how she was just trying to protect Devi from being devastated, Devi setting her mother up (showing how much she had healed and grown since season 2), Kamala being too attached to her family to move away and Nalini telling her that change is good (and even Kamala's coping mechanism of becoming overprotective of Nirmala), Kamala and Devi's sweet moments, the family's acceptance and joyous celebration of Nirmala finding love again, Nirmala calling Nalini out for being mean to Devi, and of course, the heartwarming scene of Nalini helping Devi pack and telling her she's proud of her. Devi's final monologue focused primarily on how much she cares about her mother. Did all of that mean nothing to some people?

Never Have I Ever is not an unproblematic show. But I still can't believe it's being reduced to this. I. Seriously. Just. Can't. Devi was so much more comfortable in her skin than when the show started, and was no longer obsessed with external validation. Her relationship with Nalini had improved greatly. She embraced her culture so much more. She was okay with not getting into Princeton, and realised that she'd always be connected to her father no matter what. I don't mind that she didn't completely give up on her Princeton dream. I don't think she needed to, to show that she had healed. She was able to tell her dad's story in a way that felt true to herself, and did not feel exploitative (she reclaimed her power from a racist white guy). She was truly happy when she prayed to the gods before leaving to Princeton. She was surrounded by people who cared about her and loved her, as she said. And she was happily in the middle of a fun game of Never Have I Ever before Ben showed up. She had learned to love herself and her life. The show having a happy (for now) ending does not equal them saying that everything is going to be okay forever. The world is still brutally unfair. Devi is just a little better at dealing with it.

I don't know who needs to hear this but Never Have I Ever had a TEAM DEVI ending! Just because Devi was not single at the end of the show/ended up with someone you dislike, it doesn't mean that the ending wasn't a win for team Devi.

TEAM DEVI FOR THE WIN! AND THAT'S WHAT WE GOT.

I'll acknowledge that there were issues with the show throughout all four seasons. But I can't see such an empowering show being dismissed in such a ridiculous way.

[vani-is-typing]

Devi Vishwakumar's journey has been a wacky one with statistically there being more downs than ups for her, but I believe I don't regret being there for all of it.

Yes there were a shockingly stupid number of moments when I wanted to drown in a pail or choke myself or wished to be put into a medically-induced coma so I wouldn't have to deal with the sheer second-hand embarrassment that came from seeing her high school years play out before me; but these moments are also the ones that have kept me entertained and always anticipating for what will happen next season.

It's bittersweet to see the chaos of Devi's life, and that of her friends and family and foes, come to an end. It's also hopeful. I mean, if Devi can manage to figure her shit out, so can I.

Right?

[livelovecaliforniadreams]