#pathetic Dean

[seasononesam]

You gotta send us back.

[hhoneylemon]

𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘯 𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳

headcanons

Love Languages

acts of service

he’s the one post that’s like my love language is acts of service but all i know to do is kill

he will murder anything that hurts you. he is very protective but it’s cause he loves you, ‘kay?

does little things; picks you up your favorite snacks and drinks when he gets supplies, always makes sure there’s enough coffee for you.

he’ll bother making sure the impala always has a blanket or one of his jackets for you. he likes making sure you’re comfortable!

physical touch

please please please cradle his face it brings him so much comfort. he melts into it and gives you these big sad eyes and all you can do is kiss his forehead or just utter a ‘i love you’ or ‘you’re so pretty’

likes to just lay with you. he’ll take naps while you research, head plopped in your lap and body splayed across the bed. maybe instead he’ll rest his head on your shoulder and throw an arm around your torso. you get the point.

sometimes boots sam into the backseat so that he can have his passenger prince(ss). hand holding yours or holding your thigh, his mood automatically better than when you’re in the backseat.

words of affirmation

now, he himself does not convey his thoughts and feelings into words often. something something toxic masculinity.

he does, however, seriously appreciate when you tell him how you feel.

he’s a puddle in your hands as you remind him that you love him and that he’s so good to you and that he’s soo handsome. he’s looking at you with puppy eyes and his lips look so soft it’s not your fault if you give him a little kiss.

Dates

drives in the impala. he’ll drop sam off back at the motel or at a bar or restaurant and will just drive around with you. holding your hand, his music playing through the car. whenever you stop at a red light, he turns to you and gives you a soft look and sings a line of the song to you.

crappy diners. there are millions in the us, you make a list of your favorites just for fun. it’s just eating food and talking while doing so, it’s so simple yet so rejuvenating. he loves doing this with you, escaping his life for the hour you spend together.

watching tv or movies from the motel tv. cuddled in bed, he’s wearing his sleep shirt and a pair of boxers, arms around you and head on your shoulder. you could be watching anything from children's cartoons to horror films, he doesn’t mind as long as you’re in his arms.

coffee shops. on an off day, you two can actually sit in a coffee shop rather than grabbing a coffee and running off to investigate people. feet touching under the table, sipping coffees while people watching outside. he tells you that you two could’ve still been in bed, hearts replacing his pupils.

lying in bed talking. this technically doesn’t count as a ‘date’, but i’m putting it here; he’s wrapped you in his arms and is resting his head on your chest. speaking in whispers so that you don’t wake up sam, you’re pouring your hearts out to each other. you could also he arguing about whether or not a hot dog is a sandwich or not, the conversations are endless.

concerts. it was said the brothers would catch a few on their off days, so why can’t you two? he looks to see which artists you both like are touring and where, then just takes you out of the blue. never tells you so that he can see the surprise and then the excitement. he sings along loudly and terribly, but he holds you close and sways you and kisses your temple, so you don’t mind.

Kisses

he loves kissing you. he loves your skin against his lips. he loves you <3

unsurprisingly his favorite is kissing your lips. melting into you while sitting, making out with you in the car, small kisses to wake you up. he doesn’t appreciate pecks. if you give him one he’s chasing you and giving you a proper kiss.

his absolute favorite kinds of kisses are the ones where you’re both desperate for each other. teeth clinking, lips melding and breathing heavy as you break apart, noses bumping together if you lean in too quickly. it reminds him you want him just as badly as he wants you.

kisses your forehead after he comes back from a hunt, then hugs you. he just needs a moment to ground himself, and then he’s kissing the top of your head and sighing into your hair.

cheek kisses are greetings and goodbyes. you bring him coffee in the morning while he’s talking to sam, he gives you a cheek kiss and a small ‘hello’. he’s about to leave to pick up food for everyone, he kisses your cheek after getting your order. the only time they aren’t hello’s/goodbye’s are when he’s leaving and coming back from a hunt. then it’s a loving kiss to the lips, slow and meaningful.

something he likes, kisses to the knuckles. they have freckles on them, like his nose, so of course you have to show them love. you press a kiss to each, then in between. then, of course, are the knuckles on his fingers. then the back of his hand. makes him so giddy, he’s smiling and blushing and gazing at you like you’re the whole world.

he would also love the one trend. i’m sure he’d love you kissing his bicep while wearing lip gloss/lipstick of some sort. a. it makes him feel strong and b. it makes him feel loved <3

Random

if anything bad happens to you ever he’s so so sad and it’s automatically his fault and his duty to make it up to you. kisses your cheeks and holds you to his chest and cradles your head and he’s mumbling about how he’ll make it all better.

gets so flustered if you press the right buttons. if you can respond to his flirting with a witty response or a better line he’s blushing and looking at you with awe. he’s fallen for you at least three times already.

he’s a mean fighter. gets defensive, yells and gets angry. if he gets mad enough he’ll throw or punch something. after his initial burst he takes one look in your eyes and feels a wave of terror and he’s mumbling apologies and trying to breathe calmly. he’s got tears pooled in his eyes when you hug him and forgive him. he’s never wants to upset you.

he’s still a kid at heart. when sam’s out at the library or getting food or spending the night elsewhere, the two of you settle into the motel bed. cuddled together, dean’s head on your chest as he watches the tv. some cartoon is playing, maybe it’s scooby doo, maybe it’s gummi bears, maybe it’s ducktales. please humor him, it makes him feel so warm and cared for.

has made you multiple mixtapes. one is his favorite songs, one is songs that remind him of you, one is songs that are “written for us”, one is songs he knows you like. blue oyster cult, led zeppelin, van halen, aerosmith commonly adorn them. the thought is sweet and the fact that songs are rarely put on multiple tapes is lovely.

his favorite photo he’s taken on his phone is of you sitting on the impala’s hood. “it’s my two babies in one, c’mon”

please let him small spoon. it means everything to him to be able to trust you with being vulnerable like that. he likes hugging your arms while they’re wrapped around him, he sleeps harder than he ever has in his life. does like to spoon you though. sometimes he just needs to remember you’re real, or he feels like he needs to protect you. holds you close to his chest and curls around you to keep you safe.

following that, i feel like there are some nights he doesn’t want to cuddle. he just needs a moment to himself to recharge and feel better. he’ll lay on one side, arm hanging off the bed. he sleeps well with you just beside him, he can feel your heat trapped in the blankets. sometimes he’ll wake up from a nightmare and just roll over and hold you, sometimes you’ll wake him and he just rolls over to hold you.

honestly a bit of a bully. it’s all lovingly, but there are times he calls you stupid or another softer insult. he is kind of a jerk so he’ll say something to rub you the wrong way and when he notices you seem put off, he’ll think over what he said and frown and apologize. he doesn’t mean to come off that way, he’s so sorry :( please forgive him with all the little smooches he’s giving you.

[eggchef]

stanford era dean + later season cas...

[cthulhum]

no because cas was seriously onto something with his whole speech like dean IS the most caring man on earth and the most selfless loving human being and knowing him has changed me too

[sky-is-the-limit]

Nah because if I was Dean-

[jerksbitch]

supernatural rewatch 2.14

my mouth is watering over this whumpy little dean from 2.14 .. hes so pitiful....

[winchestermylove]

my favorite thing ever is if sam and dean somehow get through their entire lives without crossing the line into sexual acts, until they move into the bunker.

like maybe sometime from s11-s14, they've been toxic codependent freaks since childhood but they haven't kissed, fucked, or done much else beyond a slightly-longer-than-normal hug after a near death experience.

but one night they're in the dean cave watching reruns of some show from when they were kids, both slightly tipsier than they'd like to be.

sam of course being the lightweight of the two, gets touchier and cuddlier in the darkness of the room, just the two of them, and all is right with the world.

sam doesn't know what comes over him, but he looks at dean, the light from the tv illuminating his face, and leans in. surprisingly (or not so much), dean follows suit.

their lips press together, ever so lightly, just a graze at first because both of them are still hesitant. but after a second or two, dean takes the leap and fully leans in, reaching up to rest one of his hands at the nape of sam's neck and the other on his hip. sam grips onto deans flannel, fearful that he'll pull away.

it's as if the final puzzle piece is falling into place. dean feels at peace for the first time in over a decade, and sam is overwhelmed with emotion, his eyes welling up as he reluctantly pulls himself away.

"dean," sam chokes out.

"sammy..." dean pulls sam even closer, pressing him up against his front, and brings his right hand up from his neck to push some of sam's bangs out of his eyes.

"i-i'm so sorry, dean-i didn't-"

"sam, sammy, shhh. it's okay, i know. you don't h've to say anything, i know." sam's eyes are shining with unshed tears, and dean notices he's ever-so-slightly shaking, so he pulls him in for a second sweet press of their lips, this one only barely longer than a peck.

"it's just you and me, sammy. we don't have to talk about it."

sam closes his eyes and leans his forehead against dean's, bringing both of his hands from dean's chest to cup his cheeks, "are you sure, de?"

"why didn't we do this sooner?" dean asks as he leans in once again. sammy is dean's everything, the one person that he would choose over everyone and everything. their lives are already fucked up, so why not one more thing to add to the winchester resume?

it's the most natural thing in the world; they already own every other part of each other, so sharing a kiss or two here and there is rightfully the next step.

but of course, it doesn't stop at kissing. sam and dean curl up next to each other on the couch for the rest of the night, and they haven't slept in separate beds since.

[wombpala]

I miss meg so much oh my god what we could have had. I hate this show. where is my wretched irredeemable brunette crazygirl who fell for the fail angel so bad she got a job as a nurse. not even to be nefarious just to set up lamps for him to explode

[lambmotifz]

sam’s “you wanna take another swing? go ahead, if it’ll make you feel better” “you saw what i did, come on, stop the car, take a swing!” “you satisfied?” “look, dean, it’s fine. you can unload. that’s kind of what i’m here for.”

he’s so willing & wanting for dean to take out his pain/anger on him. i’m going feral

[unholyyconfessions]

Dean trying to find people that look like Sam bc i love that concept

When he was young he remembered to look more at models in magazines with little waist and skinny legs when Sammy hit puberty. Jerking off at the sight of little buts and coming so fucking hard thinking about big hands and long fingers around his cock.

He lied about his first time. It wasn't with a tall blond bimbo with big tits (don't misunderstood, he really likes a good fuck with a blond bimbo) but it was with a skinny brunette with a cute pixie cut. She didn't have so many curves and her tits were small. And those weren't the only things that attracted him to her. She had big eyes complemented by long eyelashes and a beautiful smile that showed her dimples.

As soon as they finished, she lay down next to him to cuddle and it felt so... wrong. Her body didn't fit with his as it should, she didn't feel right. She didn't feel like Sam.

After that night he tried to stop, no more brunettes, no more skinny limbs, no more big hazel eyes or smile with dimples. No more girls that looked like Sam. Even if he wanted so badly to sink in the fantasy.

Seeing Sammy should be enough. Sammy pouting when Dad denied something to him and his smile when Dean secretly gave it to him. Sam showing his long legs in summer days and him wearing Dean's hoodies in autumn. The way he breathed in the training, how his cheek painted red. His pink nipples that Dean had the luxury to see when Sam was out of the shower. The warmth of his body when he cuddles with Dean on winter nights. Yeah, that should be enough. It has to be enough.

It was.

But when Sammy ran away something switched inside him, the hollow inside his chest, in his /heart/ was to big to care about what was right and wrong.

After some time the girls weren't enough so his gaze drifted slowly around the boys. It was the closest and at the same time the furthest thing from Sam. It was fatal.

Dean really wanted to me make it work, close his eyes and imagine /him/ right there with him. But some boys had hazel eyes but didn't look at him right. Some had the perfect mouth but the voice wasn't right. Some had the skinny complexity but the skin was too cold or too warm. They weren't right no matter how much he wanted them to be.

But then Dad disappeared and he felt more alone than any other moment in his life.

He almost choked himself with his spit when he saw Sammy under the light of his dorm.

Of course he saw Sammy when him and dad checked on him. But it was at a considerable distance, Sam was a good hunter and they should not be detected. He couldn't see the changes so far away.

He was massive. He felt it when they struggled on the floor but saw it? His brain short-circuited. Strong arms and big shoulders. Tall and with a defined body for sure. And his chest? Those tits were huge. Dean tongue felt so dry, his hands were itchy because they wanted to feel and he couldn't take his eyes away.

Dean couldn't get hard right now, he shouldn't.

Then Jess appeared and he tried to play it cool when he snapped to reality again.

After the tragedy Dean knew he shouldn't have felt this happy but he couldn't help it, no when he had his Sammy around once again. But it didn't last, just as he was happy he also felt miserable.

He almost forgot how hard it was to live with Sam again. His desire was always slow burning inside of him, sometimes taking the best of him out of missions, but with Sam next to him Dean felt like he was set on fire. Everything burned and nothing -nobody- give a real release.

Sam looked at Dean and him felt so /right/ that he felt his heart beat so strong that was painful. His voice makes Dean feel tingling all inside. When Dean made Sam laugh he felt so proud that his chest couldn't contain it fully. To his horror it wasn't enough anymore.

He wanted-no, he needed more, he needed to felt his hands caress Sam's long hair, he needed to memorize Sam's body with his hands with his eyes with his mouth. He needs to kiss, to bite, to swallow every little thing from Sam.

Finding someone new wasn't on the table anymore because he can't deny himself anymore.

Idk where i wanted to get with this but yeah

[nebulastarss]

As a tumblr user who isn't in the fandom, sometimes ill see the name Castiel and get confused cuz I'm so used to seeing the ship name.

[strawlessandbraless]

don't have any spn screencaps but i hope you feel better<3

This is perfect, and I’m somehow feeling better all of a sudden. The Jensen in a hoodie effect I guess. Thanks so much, you’re a star 💫

[kacievvbbbb]

Something about the fact that the Winchesters never really acknowledge the fact that this might be hard for Castiel. Not even in the physical all angels are continuously brainwashed to never question authority level but just on the level that the angels were his family. And hey it might have just been a little bit hard to have my whole world view upended and now I’ve killed my family in droves all for you but you don’t even care that it might have been just the tiniest bit hard for me. Just as long as you don’t gave to kill your little brother right?

What’s even worse is that the narrative bends over backwards to justify it. Like why should the Winchesters care that these are essentially Cas’ siblings when they are objectively evil? The angels used to be complicated with frustrating and contradictory motivations now if you’re not Cas or Lucifer or haven’t magically completely escaped centuries of brainwashing and devotion and family then fuck you I guess and even when you do fuck you still cause your name isn’t Sam or Dean Winchester

Even fucking Michael, objectively the most brainwashed of all, like I know Michael’s not squeaky clean but come on the Winchesters and Cas have done so much worse to earth and heaven, than Michael ever managed too. They literally have no higher ground. But yet their whoooooole plan revolves around Michael going back to his father and it’s this big gotcha moment and not two traumatized adults exploiting the very real traumatic devotion maintained by years of abuse in a moment where Michael literally had the only other source of stability he had for years snatched away from him and it was looking like his only options where to spend eternity in the company of those two clowns. You do this after he literally already helped you and just fought his brother for you? you don’t even try to come up with another plan? Honestly, It just feels malicious. As if Dean can’t understand running back to your father when every other sense of stability has been taken away from you.

Supernatural has shown over and over again that family is only important to Dean and Sam when it’s their family. Because fuck anyone else that tries to pull the same bullshit for their family you’re objectively wrong and Winchesters have the moral high ground and the right to stop/kill you. they are only ever called on this twice in 15 seasons. But come on not even fucking Cas? Cas?

[shadystranger]

I love seeing gifs of Dean winchester looking absolutely miserable, teary eyed, desperate, broken and utterly shattered. One look at his face alone and it's like someone grotesquely ripped his heart out of his chest. And I know damn well the reason behind every single instance he's looking like that is because of sam. pure acid trip.

[walk-to-gallows]

You gotta hear the unholy screeching I produce when any spn character interacts with any other spn character

[castielhoney]

here's some destiel poetry I've probably posted before but I don't remember<3

My fervent desire to be good

is constantly battling

my desire to love you.

You,

the ending, the beginning, and the middle

of everything good

and everything evil.

Blood on the perfect white snow.

Bound in chains, through these calloused hands,

The knife twists ever still.

I will hurt for a while.

Excruciatingly so.

I will bleed until I scab over

And then I will bleed again.

I will ache until I heal

And then I will ache again.

I will love you until once more we meet

And then it will not quite be the same.

Until then I will hold onto this pain

Like a wilting flower in my hand.

At the heart of it, my poetry is this:

I have loved you. I am still dealing with that.

I’m sacrificing at the altar:

Everything else is damned.

I found my salvation

because, ever since I met you,

I have been holding my love in both hands

instead of balancing it at my fingertips,

Praying it did not touch more

than a few centimeters of my skin.

Maybe this is the sole flaw of our humanity.

The reason Hades was condemned so;

He loves Persephone so neurotically

That it doesn’t matter who gets hurt when she leaves

As long as she is with him.

What we live for,

Like metal driven into our bleeding craniums,

Will guide us to our selfish ends.