#past/present because it's 10:30pm

[dstryvampres]

Come On Baby(Light My Fire) - Neil Lewis x Reader

MINORS DNI !!!!!

inspired by this song.(Light my fire by the doors)

Pairing: Neil Lewis x Reader

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: weed use, smut, p in v, unprotected sex, sex while high, reader likes the doors sorry I forced that on you

Summary: Neil always comes after his shift to visit you on your late night shift, today he decides to bite the bullet and finally buy a CD from the store, and also ask you out I guess.

A/N: I've been on a huge doors kick recently and I really just wanted to force it onto you guys, and also neil because I love him. love my two male wives neil lewis and Jim Morrison xoxo

Exactly on time, 9:06pm, is when Neil Lewis prances into your store. The ding of the bell on top of the store’s door, every Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, close to the exact same time of 9:00pm to 9:10pm, was always Neil Lewis. He got off earlier on those days, having one of his friends and co-workers able to cover the last three hours until midnight that Gumshoe was open. You, unfortunately, were stuck until past midnight at your family owned music store, which Neil seemed to take advantage of as much as possible.

“Hello,” Neil greeted you coyly, walking up to the cash register where you stationed yourself for the night.

“Can I help you with anything?” You ask Neil, knowing you absolutely cannot.

“Nope.” Same answer as always.

Neil seemed to have no interest in music at all. Possibly only ever coming in here for a brief chat with you, then a quick stop by the soundtrack area of the store, then the discount area, all while still trying to hold a conversation with you. He would leave around 10 to 10:30pm, only to be back again the next day he could. Sometimes, you enjoyed his company, the jokes he cracked were funny, and he understood your struggles of working at a very niche sector of business. Other times, you wanted to beg him to get out of the store as soon as he came in. Possibly the latter is the case tonight, his big ass head is blocking your view of The Doors: Live at the Bowl ‘68 currently playing on the TV.

“How’s work been going for you?” Neil asks.

“Slow.” Tonight you’ll entertain his presence.

“Really? It was quite busy for a Monday at Gumshoe,” Neil gloats, smiling to himself, far too pleased that his store was doing better than yours.

“Oh yeah? All five of the movie nerds in the city came over today?” You tease, rolling your eyes at Neil’s gloating.

“Actually, it was mostly new people today,” Neil says, turning around to look at the TV now.

“Oh great, just what this world needs, more Gumshoe regulars.”

“You say that like anyone who frequents this store is any better. All that TV plays is music for pretentious losers, like yourself.” Neil glares at you from the corner of his eye, annoyed, but the smile on his face makes his expression more teasing.

“Atleast people know The Doors. Everytime I walk into your store the TV’s always playing something no one’s heard about,” you retort, going back to focusing on the performance instead of Neil.

“I’ll have you know every movie I play at Gumshoe holds importance, and is something everyone should know, even if they don’t,” Neil sighs, “I’m looking to educate the public.”

“How noble.”

Neil scoffs at your comment before walking off to the discount section of the store, leaving you to watch the TV alone. Even on your busier days the store seemed to slow down at this time. Usually it is just you and Neil when he comes in, maybe an additional straggler present who came into the store knowing what they wanted already. Now that Neil’s at the discount section, you know he’ll be busy for a little bit and decide to step out from the cash register to do some cleaning for the night. Mindless work to help you go home quicker when the store finally closes its doors to the public at 12am. Your boots thump on the concrete floor as you walk around the store to put everything back to normal. Letting Neil do his rounds around the store.

Ding.

Turning around to the noise, you find Neil smiling in front of the cash register. Tonight, he’s finally buying something. You never thought the day would come. Neil, a paying customer, and not just a window shopper. You rush over to the cash register to ring him up, excited to see what he finally thought was good enough to buy here.

“Woah! Slow down, you’re acting like I’m robbing you instead of buying from you,” Neil laughs, putting the CD down onto the counter.

It’s The Doors self titled album. You look at him with a quirked eyebrow.

“The performance on the TV persuaded me,” he smiles, looking away from your gaze.

“You always striked me as a vinyl guy,” you take the CD in your hands and open it, making sure the CD isn’t scratched before scanning it.

“I am, I just wanted to listen to it in my car. I was actually hoping that – uh – you’d come listen to it with me after your shift ends,” Neil gulps, wringing his hands out.

“Sure. Why not?” You hand him the CD, “That’ll be 20 dollars and 65 cents by the way.”

“Really? I mean– great. What time do you get off?” Neil slides you the money, you can feel how sweaty his palms are just from the money.

“12:30am, sorry for the wait,” you respond, now leaving the change on the counter to avoid another sweaty palmed encounter with Neil.

“No problem at all! I’ll see you at 12:30 then!” Neil exclaimed, waving a quick goodbye to you, CD and change in hand, before exiting with a huge smile on his face.

୨ৎ

The last three hours of your shift went quite smoothly, a lack of customers allowing you to do most of your closing tasks before the store actually closed and at your own pace. You couldn’t tell if you it was because closing was so easy today or because you were seeing Neil after your shift, but your body felt weirdly tingly with excitement. Neil’s car was parked right outside of the front door of the shop, it was hard to miss because of this, and also because Neil rolled down his window and as soon as you stepped out of the shop he yelled your name and then motioned over. Quickly you lock the door to the shop and open the door to Neil’s car, sliding into the front passenger seat.

“Thanks again for coming out tonight,” Neil said, giving you a soft smile. He then reaches over to the glove box to pull out the CD he just bought and hands it to you. “Will you do the honours?”

“Of course,” you open up the CD’s jewel case and carefully slide the CD into the cars slot.

Neil started driving as the CD whirled around without any noise, before finally the sound of the soft percussion started the album off. You let the song settle into the car staring out the window as Neil drives around, seeming to drive around aimlessly.

“You want to go anywhere in specific?” Neil asks. He had let it get to the second song of the album before saying anything.

“Not really no…” you muse, biting your lip in thought for a couple seconds, “you know for my first time experiencing this album fully, I was high. If you’re not into that it’s no big deal, but, if you are, I have some pot back at home.”

“Yeah, that’d be good,” Neil sighs out, “Lead me there.”

You lead Neil through a stream of winding roads and suburb strips until you guys reach your apartment complex. Allowing Neil to park in a guest spot, he pops out the CD and puts it back into the jewel case. You lead him into the building, and up the elevator. Fiddling around with your keys at your door, before pushing it into the lock and letting the both of you in.

“It’s a little messy, didn’t know I’d have a visiter tonight,” you apologized, closing the front door behind you with your foot and putting the keys on the wall.

“Oh, it’s no worries. You should see my place,” Neil jokes, kickings off his shoes waiting for you to lead the way.

After working off your shoes you lead Neil to your kitchen. Squating down and rummaging through the back of a bottom cupboard until you find your stash in an air tight container. You pull it out of the cupboard, a couple prerolls and some edibles sit in the clear container. Good enough for tonight.

“Shall we?” you ask, standing up and grabbing your lighter.

“Take me away,” Neil says, you take his hand and lead him out to your small balcony.

Your CD player is still out here from last night, you were in a rush to get to the store after sleeping in and forgot to put it back inside. Luckily it didn’t rain and the player is in the same condition it was as before. Neil hands you the CD and you pop it into the player, in return you hand him a joint.

“Let me tell you, this album is amazing sober, but I dare say it’s even better high.” You light his blunt before lighting your own.

“I’ll be the judge of that,” Neil says, settling into the lawn chair.

The album starts up once again, ringing out between the two nof you. This time, you feel ths silence is less awkward.

“I’ve been wanting to ask you out for a while,” Neil admits, out of the blue.

“Really? How long?” You look over at him, a blunt in his hand as he stares out into the city.

“Yeah, about half a year now. I don’t come into that store because I like music, y’know?” Neil looks at you now, only you.

The lighting from inside your apartment behind him lights up his beautiful bone structure, the light of the fire of the blunt lights up his eyes, and the brief light from the city allows you to catch all the high points of his face. You didn’t realise just how beautiful Neil was until now.

“I mean I could tell you didn’t care for the music, but I just thought you were bored,” you take another hit.

“I mean the first couple of times sure, but I don’t know, there was just something about you that intrigued me. You’re funny, and hot, and so unique,” Neil admits, his eyes not leaving yours.

“Thank you.”

“I mean it,” he blinks slowly and then looks bacl out at the city, continuing, “What don you like about this album?”

“I don’t know,” you admit, laughing, “I had a weird Doors phase at some point in highschool and, I guess, the album stuck through even afterwards. What, do you not like it?”

“No, it’s great. I just want to get to know you better,” Neil says, shaking his head.

“Well, what music do you like?” you ask.

“Soundtracks, but you know that one. I really liked grunge in high school, I guess that stuck with me too a little bit,” Neil purses his lips together, coughing a little.

“Never pegged you as a grunge fan,” you say, raising an eyebrow.

“I’m full of surprises,” Neil jokes, sending you both into a fit of laughter. Something like that usually wouldn’t set you off like that, but for some reason, it was the funniest thing tonight.

The winding chords to Light My Fire started to hit when you both calmed down from the laughter, and when you’ve both started to reach the end of the rolls.

Neil reaches out his hand to you, “Want to dance?”

You nod and take his hand, putting out your blunt as you stand. You both push the chairs off to the side, before setting off into a weird unnatural dance together. It was barely together, the only thing connecting you is the brief stints in which you guys hold hands, maybe Neil spins you around when your hands come together. At some point you guys get so close that when you look up to Neil your face to face with him. He looks at you for a couple seconds before slowly kissing you on the lips, it’s soft and welcoming, allowing for you to reciprocate. Both of you break away quite quickly, another beat, your lips are pressed together again with his. This time the kiss is hungrier, you bite at his lips softly, and he slips his tongue into your mouth. 

“Do you, uh– Want to take this further?” Neil asks, breaking away from the kiss. His pupils are huge, and his hair is messy.

“Yeah,” you respond, before going back into the kiss.

Both of you stumble through the apartment and into your bedroom while kissing. You feel the back of your knees hit your mattress before Neil gently pushes you backwards onto the bed. You look up at him, he’s breathing heavily, blue eyes scanning over your body hungerily. His lips are on yours again, tongue searching your mouth, he fondles your breasts through your shirt. You could feel wetness pool in your panties as Neil started to drag his kisses down to your neck. His fingers grazed your clothed stomach before coming to toy with the hem of your shirt teasing pushing it up slowly, fingers ghosting over your stomach making you whine out. You lightly grab at his hair, tugging it to edge him on to take off your shirt already. Neil takes the hint and pushes you shirt upwards exposing your breasts to him.

Neil smiles looking up at you before taking a nipple into his mouth, sucking the bud and rolling his tongue over it. You moan out at the sensation, staring up at the ceiling, focusing on the pleasure Neil is providing you at the moment. Your body is hot, you want him to hurry up and fuck you. Alas, Neil takes his time with your breasts, toying with both of them using his mouth and fingers. It’s both agonizing and feels so good. He watches you the whole time, taking pleasure in watching your face contort in pleasure and frustration. 

Finally, Neil captures you in a heated kiss again, before breaking off and taking his own shirt off. He places your hands on his chest, allowing you to feel his body’s heat as well as his heartbeat. His heartbeat is fast, mimicking the rise and fall of his chest. You run your hands over his chest and down his arms to his hands, placing them at the top of your jeans, basically begging him to take them off. He unbuttons your jeans, slowly, like he’s done almost everything tonight. Pulling them down with your help to expose your panties, soiled with you wetness. He stares at the wet patch on your panties for a second. Grinning the whole time.

“You flatter me,” Neil says, sliding his own pants down his legs, erection glaringly present. He lets them fall into the pool of pants at the edge of them bed.

Sliding a finger up and down your clothed heat, Neil climbs back into bed with you. Diving back in to kiss you. You wrap your legs around his waist and your arms are his neck. His erection presses up against your heat, and he grinds against you. He only lasts about a minute teasing you this way before he’s discarding your panties and positioning his fingers outside your cunt.

“Please,” you whimper out, and within the same breathe his fingers have entered you.

It’s slow at first, a rhythmic in and out pace, stretching you out as best and he can, but your moans fuel him to move his fingers faster. Soon enough your gripping the sheets just at his fingers as they push on your gummy walls deliciously and feverishly. His other hand rubs up and down your thigh, watching as you twitch and moan on his fingers, watching as your pussy takes his fingers in so easily. You clench around his fingers, back arching at his work, and all the sudde his fingers are gone. You look at him with a look of betrayal, which is quickly settled when you see him slide his underwear off, exposing his cock.

“Can I fuck you?” Neil asks, like his swollen tip isn’t already pressed against your entrance.

“Yes please.”

It’s all Neil needs before he’s sliding into you, stretching you out so nicely as he pushes in. When he bottoms out he’s pressed up against that sweet spot inside of you, almost like his cock is made just for you. Both of you sigh of as Neil stays still for a few seconds before pulling out of you slowly. 

“Oh baby, your pussy ‘s so good,” Neil slurs, pushing back into you.

His hands find your waist as he pushes in and out of your pussy. With each thrust Neil’s speed increases, his once calculated and rhythmic thrusts becoming wild and irregular as he continues to fuck you. You scratch his back as he fucks into, moaning as your eyes roll back.

Who knew movie nerds were such good fucks?

“Can I flip you around baby?” Neil pants out, his grip on your waist tightened.

You nod and he slips out of you, allowing you to get on all fours before pushing back into you. He’s hitting further back in this position, stretching out and reaching parts of you that you forgot felt so good.

“Fuck, baby, you look so good, you feel so good,” Neil babbles as he resumes his pace.

You don’t think you can last much longer in this position, with Neil fucking a specific spot in you consistently. He reaches over a hand and starts toying with your nipple again, and thats when you feel the slip happening.

“I’m gon’ cum, Neil, gonna cum,” you whine, arms giving out and face getting shoved into a pillow by Neil’s thrusts.

“Oh– fuck, me neither, cum all over my cock for me, fuck please baby, god please, cum all over my cock,” Neil speeds up his thrusts, reaching his hand down from your boob to your clit.

Neil rubs quick fast circles into your clit. Steadily, but roughly fucking you into your own mattress.

For a moment everything goes black as all you can feel is the knot in your stomach come undone and a shiver run up your body. 

When you return Neil is slumped over beside you, both of you laying down beside eachother. He strokes your hair softly before kissing your forehead.

“Thank you,” Neil whispers, bringing you into his chest.

You decide to stay like this for the night, too tired to move. Neil covers up the both of you letting you fall asleep in his arms.

[kaisacobra]

Thank you for saying that it really means a lot, I actually used to write fan-fiction a couple years back and I’ve recently tried to start again but I’m very critical of what I write and how I write it so I’m incapable of producing a single chapter.

Keep it mysterious, I’ll be eagerly awaiting whatever you gift us ✨

Now that you mention it, yes I completely understand what you mean about R not being able to be extremely cold to Tara. R seems like the type of person who’d be hurt and disappointed, someone who wouldn’t necessarily be cold to Tara but would definitely hide from her. For R I’d imagine it’d be an internal battle of what she wants versus what she deserves, we already get a feel for that in the first chapter but it was easier for her to choose what she wants- which is to provide whatever comfort and happiness Tara wants because she loves her so much over what she deserves- someone who cares about her in a consistent manner and not only when it’s convenient (boo Tara😡). After Tara’s outburst I think R would have to force herself in every way possible to really process that she can’t put Tara’s needs above her own anymore, as much as she loves Tara doing that would reinforce the notion that everything Tara said is true. We know she always runs back but now that’s she’s been ridiculed for it she can’t.

The way she’s always there for Tara makes me wonder about her background. Maybe this is TMI, but I personally have experienced many relationships like this in the past. My father abandoned my sister and I at a very young age, so part of the reason I would always be there for them and never left first even when I should’ve but wouldn’t- was because I never wanted them to feel as unloved and unworthy as I did when my father left me. By the time I was a teenager I’d already forgiven him for all the abuse my family endured because of him, in my heart nobody could ever hurt me the way he hurt me- so I’d forgive them even though the people around me would expressively tell me not to, you know? But im older now and I stand my ground, i can leave when if its what’s best for me and not get too caught up in what’s best for them.

I’m from California by the way! It’s 10:30PM right now, you’re from Brazil though? That’s so cool! Did you grow up there? My parents were born in Mexico but they moved to USA in the late 1980’s, I wanna move to Mexico and live there for a couple years because my mother loves and talks about her hometown so much, the idea of seeing where she grew up in person and picturing her as a little girl warms my heart.

- ☘️ (I’m gonna use this as my anon tag from now on)

I feel like everyone is gonna be critical when it comes to their own stuff, like, I'm not kidding when I said i thought second best wasn't that good, specially because I used to be an essay tutor/monitor at school and my writing had to be more than perfect. Just remember that usually you're gonna be more critical of your work than other people and it doesn't mean that what you write is actually bad.

I'm so sorry that happened to you and I'm glad that you can stand your ground now!💪 I know this will sound oddly ironic but all the background information I have on R is about... Tara. In my head, R is divided by past (beginning of friendship, woodsboro), present (the current mess) and future (what's gonna happen) so, in a way, maybe her life is all about Tara😔

I don't think R's family are gonna make an appearance so I'll leave it up for you guys to hc whatever you want as R's reason for being so attached to Tara.

California seems so nice! And yeah, i grew up here and i wouldn't have it any other way🤭 Maybe this happens to everyone in their own home country but i just love my culture and history so much, I can't imagine living anywhere else.

Mexico sounds super cool! I've been wanting to go there, specially in 2026 because of the world cup (really wanted to see it live) but i dont think it's gonna happen😔 Either way it's a beautiful country i wanna visit someday and i definitely have to start improving my spanish.

[mischiefmanifold]

some things that have happened at work that I can remember because I need somewhere to put these and also I need to share them because what the fuck (under the cut bc this got long)

20 cheeseburger order at 11:30pm (after 10pm we typically have less than 6 employees in store, and usually get hit with huge rushes)

man says the order he placed and paid for wasn't his, then comes back 10 mins later and complains that the food he got wasn't right (because it wasn't what he ordered. he insisted he had a different order which led to me re-ringing in the order he took for the person who actually ordered it)

the lobby door lock broke (again) (essentially too many people yanked on the handle full-force which broke the latch) (one of the people who do this is another manager btw)

hammered homeless guy comes in and sits in lobby 4 hours after it closed and gets mad when we tell him he has to leave

people walking through the drive thru mid-rush to ask for water (huge pain in my ass bc if they get hurt I'm liable and people drive so fucking fast in our drive thru)

customer's car broke down outside the window which caused a 30-minute holdup while cars kept coming and the customer tried to start their car again

people placing orders just to drive away (this happens all the time it just seems like this past week has been really bad with that)

I dropped three clean tills on the floor and had to spend an hour after my shift cleaning up the mess and fixing the tills

4th of July we had cars wrapping around the building for six hours straight. it didn't die down until about 3am and by that point we couldn't get any of the cleaning and breakfast prep done

guy who we pulled to a parking spot came into lobby, complained about how he didn't see anyone actively making his mcflurry (spoons were being washed), then demanded a refund ONLY for the mcflurry, took the rest of his food that had just come up, and left

guy was seen walking around the building yelling and waving his arms for three hours after midnight (12-3am) with an only fem-presenting staff. police were called and they got him to leave, only for him to show up the next morning after the lobby had opened again to do the same thing

someone ordered something like 50 mcdoubles and then their order was messed up so they scheduled a pickup for when I was working, then didn't show up. we wasted so many sandwiches it was fucking insane

this lady who comes in between 2-4pm and always orders a hyper-specific iced coffee (iced caramel coffee with 9 cream and extra caramel, with at least 4 creamer cups on the side). she's really nice though

people who come during rushes and ask for fresh cookies (we usually throw a bag in the microwave, unless we're feeling generous or multiple orders need cookies. if you really want fresh cookies order the tote, they're always made fresh)

[copperdaisy]

Yu-Gi-Oh! OC Week Day 5 - Swap

This one is a little late because I immediately crashed into a four hour nap after work. Before I knew it, it was 10:30pm and I had yet to put word one on the digital paper, and then my net went down. Anyway, for this prompt I decided to go with a role swap AU. Never actually written anything where Sanura has an Item despite her being around since 2005.

(@ygoc-week)

(I am almost out of artwork and want to save the last piece for another prompt so, old design swap Picrew from a couple of years ago it is. As I understand it this particular Picrew no longer exists, otherwise I'd link it.)

Day 5 - [Role] Swap Word Count: 857 Characters: Sanura, Atem, Seth, Mahaad Rating: G

Most days at court were dry and uneventful slogs. Streams of petitioners filed in before the throne to plead their cases for special political or religious matters, or to seek justice for criminal charges that lower courts had been unable to pass judgment on. Pharaoh Akhenamkhanen listened to them all. It did not matter to him how petty or ridiculous or inane a request was. He was a fair man who did his best to guide his people and protect them. For that, Sanura could not fault him, even if she did think he was stretching himself thin. His health was not as strong as it had been when she became part of his inner circle. The stresses of fending off the invasions of years past had greatly aged him.

Still, there was strength left in him yet, and he was not slowing down. But that did not mean that he was not preparing for the inevitability of death. He had begun to take more obvious steps to preserve the peace and prosperity he had wrested from the jaws of defeat. More and more often days at court involved visits from delegations from the far reaches of the kingdom. Today was no exception.

Today was, however, special. Today was the day Prince Atem's betrothed arrived. It was not something that the Prince in question was excited about.

He already had his eye on someone. Sanura had sat through several venting sessions from her friend about it and had attempted to reassure him each time. The marriage was a political move meant to strengthen the ties between the throne and the far northern tip of the kingdom. It didn't have to mean that Atem had to give up all thoughts of marrying the person who he had chosen himself. He had given her the flattest look each time she pointed out that multiple marriages were not unheard of among the royal family. There were no doubts that he would go along with the marriage out of loyalty to his father and duty to the throne, but he still found the whole situation uncomfortable.

Atem was doing a remarkable job at hiding his apprehension as the northern party was ushered in. Standing on the dais next to Akhenamkhanen he appeared composed, his expression carefully neutral. It was his standard court mask that Sanura had come to recognize from him. His social skills were still rough around the edges but attending official proceedings had taught him how to hold his emotions close to his chest. He never wanted to embarrass his father.

As Akhenamkhanen rose to greet their visitors Sanura let her eyes roam over the assembled group. They were a mostly unremarkable bunch though none would question their social status. The representative that spoke for them was a thin wisp of a man with graying hair, dressed in crisp linen dyed a pale green and adorned with a near garish amount of jewelry. He nearly outshone the nobleman's daughter standing beside him. Her dress was a soft sandy shade trimmed in sky blue, a golden belt and a gem set bracelet her most obvious accessories. She was doing her best to present herself as confident but there was a bit too much fidgeting for the illusion to stick properly. Sanura found herself wondering if the girl had ever been so far from home.

The thought was short lived. As her gaze shifted to the man shadowing the girl a slight jolt ran through her. The Ring stirred around her neck, vibrating enough to lightly jingle the tines that dangled from it. From the corner of her eye she noticed Seth shooting a subtle glance in her direction. He must have heard it, or had seen her subtle change in posture. She ignored him and the Ring settled after a few moments. Whatever had triggered it must have been a source of interest, not danger. The Ring seemed to have a mind of its own and she had come to accept its odd quirks. It continued to hum in the back of her head as she reexamined the stranger that had caught its attention. The man was easily the tallest member of the party that had been let in. Broad shouldered, solidly built, dressed in simple plain clothing and trace hints of gold – the personal guard of the daughter, perhaps. He was observing everything with a placidity that spoke of strength and self assurance. But there was more than that, something that Sanura could not put her finger on. Judging from how Seth shifted his weight and narrowed his eyes when they met the stranger's she was not the only one who felt that way.

Whoever the man was looking at him put her on edge. But there was no reason to make a scene and interrupt the introduction of the nobleman's daughter. Sanura was certain that there was something potentially dangerous about him, but the same could be said about any guardsman. The Ring sensed no immediate threat from him. For now she would stay quiet and keep a close watch on him until she had him figured out.

[addictedtostorytelling]

Hello, I hope you're having a great day! Just wanted to ask a CSI season 6 episode 11 question about Sara and Sophia's interaction. Do you think that Sara is still mad about Sophia being close with Grissom. Or is something else going on? Thank you for your response.

hi, anon!

i hope you're having a good day—or night now—too!

if you're referring to the scene at the phone booth, i don't think sara is mad at sofia there at all (though sofia is definitely miffed at sara for being "late").

instead, i think what's going on there is that sara is being aloof because reasons.

check it out:

within the universe of the show, the events of episode 06x11 "werewolves" take place primarily on 01.03.06 and 01.04.06.

when the team is initially called in to process the victim's residence, it is, according the call log on the victim's phone, sometime after midnight on 01.03.06. they remain at the victim's residence processing until after sunrise that same morning.

sara is present for this action, as is grissom. however, thereafter, sara quickly drops from view throughout the middle part of the episode, during the remaining daylight hours, as does grissom (after he attends the victim's autopsy with doc robbins back at the lab). neither one of them then resurfaces in the episode again until after nightfall.

since both of them are conspicuously absent from the action taking place during the daytime hours at the lab, i think it's fairly safe to assume that they go home together at that time and remain there between approximately 10am and 10:30pm or so.

why they get to go home while the rest of the team is pulling a double, we can't say for certain; maybe they've both already used up all their overtime hours for the month, or maybe they were coming off a previous double from the day/night before.

maybe they'd worked the new year's eve and new year's day shifts while everybody else got those nights off.

in any case, during the hours while they are away from the lab, presumably during the afternoon/evening of what is regularly swing shift on 01.03.06, sofia tries to page sara to come process the payphone booth. however, sara does not respond to sofia's pages until sometime around the start of the next graveyard shift, circa 11pm on 01.03.06.

now.

in s1 and s2 of the show, we are shown that not only does sara always leap to respond to her pages, but she also sometimes shows up to work even when she hasn't officially been paged (like in episode 01x07 "blood drops," when she hears about the collins homicide over her police scanner and shows up to the scene of her own volition). only in s3, specifically when she is dating hank, does sara ever respond late to a page (see episode 03x03 "let the seller beware")—a marked change in her behavior, contingent on her for the first time ever having "someplace better to be" than at work. however, once she and hank break up, she then resumes her typical "always eager to show up to a scene" mo, as we see in episode 04x14 "paper or plastic?"

—at least until this episode, 06x11 "werewolves," takes place.

that so, the fact that sara doesn't immediately respond to sofia's page and buzz right over to the phone booth during her off hours in this episode is telling—and especially taken in conjunction with the episode timeline, as we've previously established it.

the subtle implication is that baby girl doesn't respond to sofia's page because she's got someplace better to be during her off-hours than at work.

she's home with grissom.

most likely at home in bed with grissom.

she's not answering that phone for anything.

the sara of the past would've come in early when called upon, but the sara who is secretly dating the love of her life and is blissfully happy spending all of her free time with him isn't going to show up until the start of her assigned shift.

not unless she has to.

not when she's, uh, busy.

of course, given the whole "secret dating" thing, she also can't tell sofia why she didn't drop everything to come in early to work—hence her aloofness during her and sofia's conversation.

all things considered, i read sara's interaction with sofia as follows:

sc: (annoyed) “i’ve been waiting for you.” 

ss: (evasive) “sorry. i headed out as soon as i got your page.” 

sc: “really? 'cause, uh, i left a voicemail several hours ago.” ss: (momentarily looks caught, then awkwardly sidesteps sofia’s insinuation sans comment, wearing a false smile) “what’s up?”

she isn't mad at sofia. she's just sidestepping the real reason why she ignored sofia's pages over the course of several hours.

his name is gilbert, and he's very distracting.

and to that end: i honestly think that by this point in the show, sara has gotten over whatever old jealousy she used to have for sofia anyway, because, frankly, at this late date, there's nothing really to be jealous of (if there ever even was something to begin with).

even if there had been some spark of attraction between grissom and sofia in the past—and it's definitely debatable if there ever was or if sara was simply reading signs where there were none—grissom and sara are now very much together and in love and sharing a life, with sofia nowhere in the picture.

the last bit of tension we see to that end between sara and sofia is in episode 06x08 "a bullet runs through it" pt. ii, which takes place, in-universe, several months before this episode does. thereafter, there are never any additional implications that sara still considers sofia a threat. their interactions are just neutral.

so anyway, that's my take: sara isn't nursing any kind of grudge with sofia in this episode; she's just trying to hide the fact that she had her phone on silent and didn't check her messages because she was at home getting absolutely railed by her boyfriend.

she's dodging, and not particularly gracefully.

thanks for the question! please feel welcome to send another any time.

[bleachbleachbleach]

2/12 - 2/18/2024

I usually have a couple 9-10:30PM meetings a month (due to timezone differences), but this last month I've had 9-10:30PM meetings like every three days, which I've absolutely hated. The big event they were leading up to finally happened on Friday, though! I am freeeee! But this week was not a great writing week, because of all the meetings encroaching on my fanfic time, and all the menal energy I had to expend on the act of collaborating closely with someone who takes years off my life every time we interact. 🥲

But I am very proud of myself because post-event I did still write things this weekend, even though circumstances are not ideal for different reasons (airplanes, airports, not being at home). I'm a huge proponent of "just fucking write it, do not wait for mythic 'ideal time' it is mythic," but I still find it difficult to actualize it because I don't like writing fanfic with other people are in the same room lol. But I did it! Only for like 700 words total, but I did it!

This story continues to be very non-chronological. Chapters 8/9/10 (the one I am writing now, Hisagi's, is Chapter 9) are definitely the most non-chronological across chapters, and I do think it's part of the nature of the thing; like, thematically, I think it makes sense. And I'm someone who is very open to things being extremely non-chronological. But as was also true when I was writing Hinamori's chapter (which has like four timelines in it, internal to the chapter), part of me is also like, why is it like this, though. For the most part, they're not even blocked-off flashbacks; it's just internal narration and/or dialogue that becomes some full-on scene in a different timeline. And I'm always a little wary of too many things told in retrospect, because it does remove the immediacy of them/risk tending toward summary rather than scene. I mean, I think summary is underutilized as a potent writing tool (employed appropriately), but the question is always, is THAT what's happening here, or am I just making the scene boring and worse, actually. XDD

As for the non-chronology, like I said, I think it makes thematic sense that this is how this fic works, but I also feel like I'm on storm watch for like "okay does this need to be THIS convoluted tho?" Right now Hisagi's chapter is like: [fake retrospective] [present] [actual retrospective] [atemporal sort-of flashback] [present] [future predictions] [present musing about past] [present] [present] [timeskip, later present]. Sooooooo we'll see how that ends up actually hanging together.

Aaaaand in writing this post I realized I need to go back and change all the "Renji"s to "Abarais" sigh rip as usual.

[hotarutranslations]

Today I Ate Pizza

Evening

Sorry for not updating yesterday!!! It makes you think, if she doesn't have time to update, she must have a lot on her mind.. right!

Its not like that at all!!!

Yaho!!! I'm fine!!!

I have a bit more than usual, To think about but, Nah, attempting..

I'm attempting something but! its just a bit more than usual

I have on thing to decide on now, I'm a bit late in doing that! And its been decided! Alright!

Without fail I watch Kajisak Channel every day, in addition to that, recently, I've also been watching the Tohoku Rakuten Golden Eagles Channel, and playing Tsumtsum too, while thinking, lets watch Reiwa Roman-san's live stream (the archive) today--🫶🏻, I'm continuing with my daily life as usual!

We're also having rehearsals,

There are moments that feel special, though..

After all for me, Since I've been doing this for a full 13 years, its a luxury but, it has a strong sense of being my daily life😌🤍

Ah, but, there are somethings that were different than usual!

Tsubaki-chan is also having rehearsals in autumn as well, I met with them~~~🤍

I didn't get to meet with them in Aichi, so I'm happy I met with them~~~🤍

The force of Tsubaki, made the studio shake a lot! lol We will also do our best again!

Today the Hello Station that was released,

Shimoitani Yukiho-san, talked about "Start Line"😌🫶🏻

The entirety of the Hello Con was released on YouTube but, Its only limited to one month, Because Yukiho-chan talked about it, the video will remain on Hello Station in a sense💜💙

Thank you..🩷

Definitely check it out during this time😌🤍

Thank you very much for the ceremonial pitch, at Rakuten Mobile Park Miyagi⚾️

Play▶️List

Debut song 48th Pyoko Pyoko Ultra~

I danced a lot on my own..

🕺

Graduation Announcement Blog🐣🪽

Hello! Station #531 I also talk about my graduation in this video

📺TV Tokyo "Premier MelodiX!" September 9th (Mon) 2:50~3:20AM Morning Musume '24 will be performing🤍 …and there will also be a talk🤍

📺The MusiQuest 2024 They're airing a live digest from that day!

̗̀📣 Over-Air Broadcast September 14th (Sat) 4:00~4:30AM~ ̗̀📣 CS Broadcast September 28th (Sat) 12:00~5:00PM 📺Sendai Broadcast "Ara Ara Kashiko"

I appear once a month as part of the AraKashi Family

The previous shows, and makings, are on OX VIDEO STORE!

📺Hello Pro Dance Every other Thursday at 11:30PM~

Thank you for following.. Instagram💙🩵

💿 August 14th new single✨ "Nandaka Sentimental na Toki no Uta/saiKIYOU"

🪩Sawayaka Goro Birthday Event September 8th on the day of Goro-san's birthday🎂 I'll be appearing as a guest at the birthday event🎂

🪩"Morning Musume '24 Concert Tour Autumn WE CAN DANCE!"

Its Ishida Ayumi's last tour💙 I'm looking forward to seeing you

🪩"ROCK IN JAPAN FESTIVAL 2024 in HITACHINAKA" September 22nd GRASS STAGE 10:30AM~

→Tickets are on general sale

📻Morning Musume '24 Morning Jogakuin ~Houkago Meeting~

Airs Every Saturday, On Radio Nihon at 12:00AM~

Past Broadcast Episodes Are Available →Program Details

I visited as a guest🪽 "Sayashi Riho and The Time From Now On" presented by Meiji Bulgarian Yogurt

📻I visited as a guest🤍 Harami-chan no Harami Fan Radio♪

Web The Television

see you ayumin <3 https://ameblo.jp/morningmusume-10ki/entry-12866248124.html

[prismaticpichu]

Fluffy Zack & Seph nonsense because I like going to bed feeling good!!!!

- Zack introduces his buddy to all kinds of food. Sephiroth’s not a (complete) idiot: he knows what ice cream is, but he didn’t know that people put them in between wafers and mimic sandwiches. What is this delicious sorcery??? (Everything in moderation ofc. Zack frequents the vending machines… frequently.)

- Having left for Shinra at age 13, Zack really only has a seventh-grade education. Never to fear! Sephiroth tutors him whenever he can, sitting at either his or Zack’s kitchen with an open textbook and one of those frilly pens. Sephiroth’s never been to school so he just teaches everything he knows, whiiiich includes the phases of mitosis, cellular respiration, and the quadratic formula (while also learning that Zack learns best when things are presented in a rhyming song). He tests him every Friday and if passed, they’ll watch any movie of Zack’s choosing.

- Zack falls asleep a lot on Sephiroth’s couch. Oopsie. He’ll usually fall asleep to the sound of Seph typing away at a report and awake the next morning draped in a blankie.

- Zack often steals the keys to the office so that Seph can’t go in past 10:30pm. It’s time to sleep! (He does this when Seph gets up for one reason or another- accidentally locking him in the office once was enough.) Sephiroth obviously catches on, but gradually adapts to the routine and finds himself wanting to relax when he’s finished all the paperwork. Sure, he can bite into tomorrow’s work…. but he’d rather bite into dinner.

- Sephiroth spends 25 minutes brushing his hair.

- Zack spends 30 minutes picking what cereal to eat in the morning.

- During troop training, Sephiroth spars with the SOLDIERs while Zack’s always ready with a first-aid kit.

- Whenever a bird flies by, black or white, they both make a promise that they’ll never leave the other’s side <3

[laresearchette]

Saturday, October 08, 2022 Canadian TV Listings (Times Eastern)

WHAT IS NOT PREMIERING IN CANADA TONIGHT? CURSED FRIENDS (Premiering on October 21 on Much at 10:00pm) THE DISAPPEARANCE OF CARI FARVER (TBD - Lifetime Canada) PUMPKIN EVERYTHING (TBD)

NEW TO AMAZON PRIME CANADA/CBC GEM/CRAVE TV/DISNEY + STAR/NETFLIX CANADA:

CRAVE TV 44 CATS (Season 2, Episodes 1-52) MECHA BUILDERS (Season 1, Episodes 1-26) THE RACCOONS SPECIALS THE RACCOONS (Seasons 1-5) SESAME STREET (Season 52)

GRAND SLAM OF CURLING (SN360) 12:00pm: National - Women’s Quarterfinals (SN1/SN360) 4:00pm: National - Men’s Quarterfinals (SN 360) 8:00pm: National - Semifinals

MLB BASEBALL - WILD CARD GAMES (SN1) 12:00pm: Rays vs. Guardians - Game #2 (SN) 4:00pm: Mariners vs. Jays - Game #2 (SN) 7:30pm: Padres vs. Mets  - Game #2 (SN1) 8:30pm: Phillies vs. Cardinals  - Game #2

PRE-SEASON NHL HOCKEY (SN Now) 2:00pm: Predators vs. Sharks (TSN4) 7:00pm: Red Wings vs. Leafs (SN Now) 7:00pm: Devils vs. Bruins

WOMEN’S RUGBY WORLD CUP (TSN) 2:00pm: Match of the Day (TSN3) 7:30pm: United States vs. Italy (TSN/TSN3) 10:15pm: Japan vs. Canada

CFL FOOTBALL (TSN/TSN3/TSN5) 4:00pm: Lions vs. Argos (TSN/TSN5) 7:00pm: Elks vs. Blue Bombers

W5 (CTV) 7:00pm: Royal Retreat; Smoked

MLS SOCCER (TSN4) 7:30pm: CF Montreal vs. DC United (TSN/TSN4/TSN5) 10:00pm: Whitecaps FC vs. Austin

ABSOLUTELY CANADIAN (CBC) 8:00pm: Hodan's Story; The Photographer:  Hodan Nalayeh returns to her birth country of Somalia to spread light; Faye Schulman survived the Nazis because she could operate a camera and became one of the only known Jewish partisan photographers of WWII.

CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE FIRST AVENGER (CTV) 8:00pm: After an experimental program turns him into a supersoldier, Steve Rogers (Chris Evans), now known as Captain America, leads the fight against Red Skull's evil HYDRA organization.

BIG FOOD BUCKET LIST (Food Network Canada) 8:00pm: Dutch Dutch Baby

YELLOWSTONE ROMANCE (W Network) 8:00pm: When Olivia learns her best friend intends to marry a breeder and leave the city, she decides to organize a bachelorette party at a ranch in the countryside. Fate soon strikes when Olivia finds herself falling for the owner of the ranch.

THE KILLER IN MY FAMILY (CTV Drama) 8:00pm/9:00pm (SERIES PREMIERE): Fred and Rose West committed at least a dozen horrific murders over two decades. Fred's brother and niece reveal how his heinous crimes affected the family. In Episode Two, Richard Ramirez raped and tortured over 25 victims and killed over a dozen. His niece tells her story and reveals how his terrible crimes affected the family.

AN AUTUMN ROMANCE (Super Channel Heart & Home) 8:00pm:  A woman tries to save a small, historic hotel from developers, but she soon realizes that the man she's falling for is behind the hotel's development plans.

SOUL ON ICE: PAST, PRESENT AND FUTURE (CBC) 9:00pm: The unknown contributions of black athletes in ice hockey.

SINS OF THE AMISH (Lifetime Canada) 9:00pm/10:15pm (SERIES PREMIERE):  A group of Amish survivors and experts expose the private world of Plain communities and the abuse fueled by their customs; forbidden from engaging with outsiders, one brave survivor reports family members to the police, which culminates in a trial.

WOLF (Crave) 9:00pm: Believing he's a wolf trapped in a man's body, Jacob and his animal-bound peers undergo increasingly extreme forms of curative therapies. However, once he meets the mysterious Wildcat, their friendship blossoms into an undeniable infatuation.

ZERO CONTACT (Starz Canada) 9:00pm:  Connected by their devotion to the late founder and tech titan Finley Hart, five people must work together to shut down his most secret invention, a machine that is either the solution to mankind's problems or the end of life on Earth.

THE RIGHTEOUS (Super Channel Fuse) 9:10pm:  Grappling with grief and struggling with his faith, a man encounters an enigmatic stranger who has sinister intentions.

PICTURE PERFECT ROMANCE (Super Channel Heart & Home) 9:30pm: Zoey Ross gave up on love and her passion for wedding photography after her fiance, Todd, left her at the alter five years ago. When a childhood friend insists that she be their wedding photographer, she reluctantly accepts and finds herself again.

[tsukkiseasalt]

Eyes That Won’t Wonder

2

“What, what!?” You shriek.

Another low laugh erupts from him as he leans against the door, his large frame blocking any potential view of the inside.

“I believe that is a compliment.” He mumbles his lips curling up into a sly smile. 

“Y-yeah, it was.” You stammer, words barely making themselves out of you as your stomach begins to do cartwheels.  

“As much as I'd love to stay right here and chat, you’d probably find it to be much more comfortable inside.” He says, smile fully present now, and you take a moment to admire the sight-storing it in your mind. He moves enough for you to slip right past him and pause the moment your feet touch the dark hardwood floors. 

The aroma is the first thing that invades your senses. It smells of pine and a rich tobacco, with slight hints of something sweet- maybe vanilla, you can’t really tell. The home is just as beautiful on the inside as it appeared from the outside. The dark hardwood floors complimented the ivory walls and dark rust colored trim. The living room was sparsely decorated though, it had only one couch, a chestnut loveseat and a matching recliner. He obviously doesn’t get many visitors. 

“Your home is beautiful.” You say breathlessly, eyes roaming the space in awe. 

“Thank you.” He exclaims, a large hand grazing the small of your back as he slips behind you and towards the kitchen. His touch makes your knees go weak and you steady yourself by placing a shaky hand on the door.

“Would you like something to drink?” You hear him call from the kitchen.

“Ah, water please.” You answer, taking a few deep breaths before you saunter over to the counter placing your folder in front of you. He slides the glass in front of you and you nod as a thank you before you begin to sip.

“I don’t think I ever caught your name.” He says leaning back onto the fridge, arms folded over his massive chest.

“Oh, uh, my name is y/n y/ln.” You mumble your index finger rubbing the rim of the glass. 

“Lovely, it fits you.” He says, eyes catching your own. You can't help the blush that arises on your cheeks. 

“T-thank you.” You manage to stammer out, silently cursing yourself for getting so flustered so quickly. He was a patient not some guy at a bar, you needed to get a grip and you needed to get it fast. “Uhm, you’re a bit younger than most of the other patients i have worked for. Is there actually anything wrong with you?” You quiz, but the words come out a bit harsher than you intended. “Oh goodness, I did not mean that in a bad way at all sir- Mr. Wakatoshi, oh my goodness. I am so sorry.” You exhale letting your head fall into your hands. Your words are all becoming a jumbled mess and you can't help the shame that creeps up your throat. Great, now he probably thinks I'm some kind of asshole.

“No, it's okay. I understand what you were trying to say. Two years ago I had to get a disc in my back replaced and it took a lot out of me. Though I can still get around pretty well, there are still certain tasks that I need help with. I am also set to have another surgery on my knee two months from now, so I thought it would be better to have someone get accustomed to me and my habits beforehands.” He says voice monotone. Is he angry?

“Mr. Wakatoshi, I am so sorry if I came off as rude earlier- I didn’t mean to offend.” You say feeling guilty. 

He shakes his head. “You’re fine sweetheart, I’m actually quite flattered that you think that.” Before you have a chance to relish his words he starts again, “I’m going to go put some clothes on, but here. I made a list- well a schedule really- of how my day usually functions. You can look over it and if there is anything that seems to be a bit much for you let me know and we will make alterations to it.” He says walking out of the kitchen and returning with a piece of paper. “Here, I will return shortly.” He says handing you the paper. Your eyes skim the page as you read the text.

7:30am- Arrive & make coffee ( I prefer mine black)

7:45am- Read the newspaper

8:00am- Feed Randy & Lyle 

8:15am- Pour second cup of coffee & wash dishes

8:30-9:30am- 2nd Workout (If you could have a bowl of fruits waiting that would be lovely)

10:00am- Post shower stretch (Help isn’t required but appreciated)

10:30-12:00pm- Take Lyle to the park (You are more than welcomed to join us) 

12:30pm- Lunch / with Aone* (*Mon. & Thurs. only)

1:00pm- Stop at farmers market

1:30pm- Arrive home & check on Randy

1:35-4:00pm- Varies (You may leave at this time or you may stay for dinner.)

4:00-6:00pm- Prepare dinner

6:05- 6:45pm- Eat then wash dishes

All that is required of you is bolded, the italicized text is completely voluntary, though I would enjoy your company.

“Goodness.” You mumble, placing the paper down. “This is even less than I did with Washijō.” You thought you had it easy then just checking his oxygen, helping him up, and taking him wherever, but you were basically an in-home barista.

“I hope it isn't too much.” The voice startles you as he appears beside you now fully clothed- well not really. He had on a pair of dark sweatpants and a gray sleeveless shirt putting biceps on display for all to see.

“Uh, no, not at all sir. I was expecting much more actually.” You admit eyes darting between the paper and his arms. 

“Oh, well I'm sorry to disappoint you.” He says voice low as he bends down to tie his shoes. “I’m sure that there will be more for you to do after my knee surgery.”

“Yes, and I'm not disappointed sir, I'm honestly kind of relieved. I haven't worked with anyone in quite a while, so this is a good refresher to allow me to get back into the routine of things.” You say words falling from your lips before you realize it.

“Is that so?” He asks standing back up to his full height, face full of curiosity.

“Yes, my previous patient passed away and I took some time off. He and I were close, friends even, and the death really hit me hard even though I knew it was coming. It still hurts ya know.” You exclaim as feelings of sadness wash over you at the thought of your friend. 

You didn't know what you were expecting when you told him that, maybe an ‘i'm sorry for your loss’ or nothing at all but it is safe to say a hug was not one of those things. His body was warm and his chest was solid- it felt good. You wrapped your own arms around his waist and closed your eyes. 

“I hope that one day you and I could be friends as well.” He says quietly pulling away. 

You don't fight the smile that graces your face, “Yeah, I feel like we will.”

The words seem to liven him because a large smile spreads across his face again. “Well I’m gonna go lift now, feel free to look around. There's food in the fridge and snacks in the pantry. Make yourself at home.” He says walking to the back of his home.

“Oh, Mr. Wakatoshi!”

“Yes love?” He asks, turning back around, a smile still lingering on his lips.

“Who are Lyle and Randy?” You ask looking back down at the paper, partly to hide the blush that you are now sporting. “Are they your children?” 

“Yes, they are my children. I’ll introduce you when I return.” He laughs before turning back around and disappearing into a hallway.

You sigh as soon as he is out of eyesight dropping your head onto the cool marble countertop, raising your head just enough to read the time on the clock that sits unwavering by stairs. 8:37. You had just under an hour to get somewhat acquainted with the home you would now be in for ten hours a day for six days a week. You decide to begin with the kitchen, opening and closing drawers & cabinets identifying the contents within them, occasionally rubbing a light hand over them. Next is the living room. The wide open space is mostly vacant and you take a seat on the loveseat sinking back into the cushions. “Nice.” You mumble.  

Pushing yourself up you wonder to every room opening the door just enough for you to peek in and see what it is. You hesitate though when you get to the room at the end of the hallway. It’s his. You could sense it, nonetheless you slowly push the knob down and peek inside. It’s clean just like the rest of his home. You don't linger and decide its best to close the door & move onto the next. 

By 9:15  you’d looked throughout his entire home, and it was more beautiful than you could have imagined. The ceilings in the bathrooms were high and had beautiful artworks painted atop of them, they looked as though they belonged in a museum rather than someone's guest bathroom. The spare bedrooms were just as lovely. Each had a shelf that was littered with books and knick-knacks that looked foreign. All of this just fueled your curiosity- what did he do & how long did he do it?

You shrugged as you went back into the kitchen jumping when you saw his large frame in the fridge. He was shirtless, again, but this time his hair was wet and clung to his head. The small gray stripes were clear as day against his dark olive locks.

“Oh, hi. I didn’t think you’d be done yet.” You say awkwardly scratching the back of your neck.

“Yes, I finished early and decided to shower & grab a snack.” He says waving the bowl of strawberries.

“I was about to prepare one for you.” You said.

“Oh, thank you. You don't really have to do anything today, just get accustomed to things.” He says popping the small red fruit into his mouth. 

“Would you like me to stretch you out?” You ask, remembering the list. 

His eyes shoot up to yours as soon as the question escapes your lips and you realize how wrong it sounded and before you had a chance to correct yourself he spoke. “You stretch me out, I mean i’ll try anything once but i’d prefer the opposite..”

His words startled you to say the least, and almost instinctively the words flowed from your lips, “I’d like to see you try.” 

His eyes widened at your remark and at that you began to spew apologies. “Shit, fuck, DAMMIT. God, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to say that, the stretching part I mean. Well I meant that, but not what I said afterwards. Ok, let me start over. What I meant to say is do you need help stretching considering you just got done working out. There, that's what I meant.” 

Your eyes are frantic as they lock with his. God, it's the first day and I'm already gonna lose my damn job. Just great. His lips are pressed in a straight line for a moment before he finally lets the edge of them glide up into a small smirk. 

“I’ve already stretched, but I suppose I could go a little deeper, maybe a little harder this time.” He says emphasizing the two words as he pops another strawberry between his lips smirk still evident.

“The stretches of course.?” You ask for clarification.

He hums and pops another strawberry between his lips setting the bowl down onto the counter stalking towards you, his large figure quickly engulfing your much smaller one almost instantly. “That’s not quite what I had in mind.” 

You can feel his warm breath on your lips as he leans down, “But if that is what you insist.” 

A loud bark bellowed throughout the kitchen causing you to jump. He smiled and wrapped a protective arm around your waist. “No need to fret, he was probably just getting anxious to meet you.”

“He?”

“Yes, my son, or at least one of them. Come on so I can introduce you.” He says guiding you down the hallway, to his room you assumed. You were correct, you realized as he pushed the door open revealing a large dog. 

“Don’t worry sweetheart he doesn’t bite. Daddy made him promise to be on his best behavior.” He whispers lowly into your ear. 

Fuck, this may be harder than I thought.

hiiiiii, this is the second chapter & you can just check the tag eyesthatwontwonder to read the first. anywaysssss i hope you enjoyed! likes and reblogs are always appreciated <33

[inevitably-johnlocked]

hello! i hope you have a happy holidays!! just a question: do you know any good crossover fics? :0 thanks so much! 🥰

Hi Nonny!! 

Thank you! My holiday season was great <3 Sorry for the delay on the reply, but your ask was a great one because I’ve wanted to do an update list to my “movies and books” list, so I’m updating it to just “crossovers” because I have more to add and that makes me happy!! 

This list ended up getting split across two asks, so for this one, this list is all my bookmarked fics. A part 1.5 with my MFL’s is coming shortly with another ask, and I ask y’all hold off to add your own suggestions to that list instead, please :) Thank you!

CROSSOVERS and FUSIONS (Feb 2021) Pt. 1

See Also:

Fairy Tales and Fantasy

TV, Movies, and Books AU (Fantasy Pt. 2)

Wonderful Life AU

Sherlock / Hannibal Crossovers?

Science Fiction / Fantasy

Faes / Faeries

Disney-esque Fics

Moulin Rouge AU

Crossovers & Fusions Pt.1.5 [MFLs]

It's After That Hurts by jonnyluvssherlock (T, 2,791 w., 1 Ch. || City of Angels AU || Fantasy, Fallen Angel Sherlock, Soldier John, Pining Sherlock, Friends to Lovers, Permanently Incomplete Fic) – Sherlock's an angel stuck as a guardian to danger addict John Watson. Everything is fine until he gets too involved. Now he has to make the choice, eternity alone or one life time with a man who may or may not love him.

Caffeine and Adaptive Programming by DemonicSymphony (E, 5,540 w., 1 Ch. || Androids AU / Bond Fusion || Android Sherlock, Coffee Shop AU, Pining John Hinted Bond / Q, Toplock) – Sherlock is a coffee shop android slowly falling for a regular customer. But he's not supposed to be able to feel emotions.

Captain John Watson, Genetics, and Other Crazy Things by cyerus (M, 5,581 w., 1 Ch. || Torchwood Crossover ||  Humour / Crack, Jealous Sherlock, Sexual Magnet John, Captain John, UST / RST, Three Continents Watson) – The explanation for John "Three Continents" Watson? Jack Harkness is his father. Sherlock doesn't know whether he's going to die from jealousy or sexual frustration first.

The Frost Child by twistedthicket1 (M, 9,994 w., 2 Ch. || Frozen-ish AU || Magical Realism, Christmas, Angst, Fluff, Powerful John) – In a world where people are born with a Gift of varying levels, simple John Watson is the last person one might look at when thinking of any strong Magick capabilities. Hiding comfortably in the shadow of Sherlock's brilliant deducing abilities, John is content to keep it that way...

London Gods by a_different_equation (E, 11,092 w., 5 Ch. || American Gods Fusion || Magical Realism, Sex Magic, True Love, PTSD John, First Kiss/Time, Marathon Sex, Sensuality, Genie Sherlock, Human John, Internalized Homophobia, Star-Crossed Lovers, Soul Mates) – Sherlock Holmes is a jinn who does not grant wishes. However, when Dr. John H. Watson, recently returned from the war in Afghanistan, gets into his cab by "accident", it might not even need magic to grant both men their deepest wish: love.

Equilibrium by augustbird (M, 12,351 w., 1 Ch. || Flowers for Algernon Fusion || Jealous then Worried Sherlock, Sick John) – At Baskerville, John is infected by a virus that turns him into a genius. But when the infection progresses into neurodegeneration, it's a race against time to save himself.

The Nutcracker by Odamaki (T, 13,758 w., 7 Ch. || Nutcracker AU ||  Christmas, Dark Magic, Dolls) – Sherlock is unimpressed with Uncle Rudy's present. A doll? What does he want with a doll?

Wonderful, Etcetera. by VictoryCandescence (T, 16,955 w., 3 Ch. || Wonderful Life AU || Alternate Timelines, Brotherhood, Homophobia, Suicidal Ideations, Mentions of Drug Use, Friendship, Different TRF, Sherlock’s Past, Victor Trevor is Past Boyfriend, Depression, Hallucination, Love Confessions, Christmas, First Kiss) – Sherlock thinks everyone would be better off if he had never existed, including and especially himself. When he finds himself in a world in which his wish has been granted, he begins to think perhaps even he could be wrong – but it takes an unlikely chaperone to make him not only observe, but understand.

Uncharted Territory by J_Baillier (T, 19,603 w., 4 Ch. || Dystopian Future / Black Mirror AU || Alternate First Meeting, Angst, Drama, Homophobia, Bisexuality, Technology, Humour, Romance, Near Future, Happy Ending) – The System puts people through a series of assigned relationships in order to determine who their Perfect Match is. John believes that it works; Sherlock really, really doesn't. One of them is probably going to be wrong.

Once Upon a Beast Becoming by antietamfalls (T, 24,042 w., 6 Ch. || Beauty and the Beast AU || Magical Realism, Folklore, Celtic Mythology) – An act of pride, a druid’s curse, an enchanted leaf; Sherlock’s torment has lasted an age. Hope arrives in the form of one John Watson, a man uniquely suited to break the spell. But with a single night to win his affections, Sherlock finds his carefully laid plans disrupted by a monstrous killer whose sights are set on the only thing he has left to lose: John.

Classified(s) by blueink3 (E, 36,153 w., 4 Ch. || Wedding Date AU || Fake Relationship, Jealous, PIning, H/C, Idiots in Love, Happy Ending, Mary is not Nice, Escort Service) – Clara's American father is the ambassador to some such territory that Great Britain probably used to own, but she (and Harry’s undying love for her) is the reason John is getting on a flight at 12:30pm, flying across the second largest ocean in the world, and pretending to be in a perfectly happy, healthy relationship with an undoubtedly perfectly coiffed stranger. See, Clara is not only American (and wealthy to boot), she's also best friends with John’s ex-fiancée. Whom she's placed in the wedding party. As Maid of Honor. And John just happens to be Best Man. Bloody brilliant.

The Boy Who Drank Stars by kinklock (E, 36,157 w., 4 Ch. || Howl’s Moving Castle AU || Witches and Wizards, Slow Burn, Magic, Jealous John, Happy Ending, Bed Sharing) – “I’m looking for a castle,” John informed the scarecrow. “A moving one.”Except that, as it turned out, it was not a moving one at all.

we have never seen a greater day than this by Lediona (T, 36,420 w., 7 Ch. || A Royal Night Out AU || WWII / VE Day, Prince Sherlock, Soldier John, Alternating POV, First Kiss, Bittersweet Ending, Homophobia, Dancing) – Peace. At long last. It’s VE Day and Prince William desires to join the celebrations. It is a night of excitement, danger and the first flutters of romance.

Malediction by MapleleafCameo (M, 36,680 w., 11 Ch. || Ladyhawke AU || Magical Realism, Romance, Curses, Eventual Happy Ending) – Cursed to a half-life, John and Sherlock must fight the forces of evil to be reunited once again.

Only To Be With You by SinceWhenDoYouCallMe_John (M, 40,768 w., 4 Ch. || Black Mirror / Future AU || Character Death, Future Technology, Sickness/Cancer/Illness, Heavy Angst with Happy Ending, First Person POV John, Pining John, Heart-Wrenching Angst) – I tell myself that next time I’ll come near this same place again. Wait around for the mysterious stranger in his coat to dash past me, hot on the heels of a new criminal in black. I think this all the way back to my Exit, planning where I’ll wait and what I’ll say when I see him. Scheming on how to get his name. It’s only once I reach the Exit Point door that I realize two hours and forty-five minutes have passed, and I realize that this won’t be the last time I Visit. It won’t be the last time at all.

The Curious Adventure of the Drs. Watson by ShinySherlock (M, 40,883 w., 14 Ch. || BBC & ACD Fusion || Victorianlock, Time Travel / Magical Realism, Friends to Lovers, Love and Kissing, Romance, Body Swap) – What if ACD Watson and BBC Watson switched places...  “Imposter!” Hands clenching the lapels of John’s coat, Holmes shoved him anew. “Yes!” John agreed, nodding, and then grimacing. “Sort of!”

The Soul Remembers by i_ship_an_armada (E, 43,636 w., 10 Ch. || Oblivion AU || Post-Apocalypse, Movie Fusion, Science Fiction, Action/Adventure, Angst, Dreams, Bittersweet Ending) – John Watson is the lone security repairman stationed on a desolate, nearly-ruined future Earth. His dreams are plagued by a tall, dark-haired man, and when his dreams meet reality, he will be forced to question everything he believes is the truth about his life.

Anchor Point by trickybonmot (E, 49,856 w., 80 Ch. || Truman Show AU || Psychological Drama, Suspense, Slow Burn, Dark Characters / Fic, Alternating First/Third Person, Protective John, Anxious/Worried Sherlock, Tender Moments, Love Confessions, Hand/Blow Jobs, Cuddling, Jealous John, First Kiss/Time) – The world tunes in nightly for Sherlock, the ultimate in reality TV: Sherlock Holmes, a real person with a legendary name, unknowingly lives out his life in a staged setting contrived by his brother. Things get complicated when a retired army doctor joins the show to play the part of Sherlock's closest friend. This fic borrows its concept from the 1998 film, the Truman Show. However, you don't need to have any knowledge of the movie to enjoy this story.

Coventry by standbygo (E, 52,020 w., 26 Ch. || Dollhouse AU || Case Fic, Slow Burn, Sci-Fi / Fantasy, First Kiss / Time, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, BAMF John, Falling in Love) – “Let me get this straight,” John said, wondering when his life had become a science fiction film. “Some guy orders up a personality, a person, to his specifications, and they program this into a real live person, who has consented to do this, and she goes to this person and acts as his wife, or lawyer, or Royal Marine, or Navy Seal or what have you, and she has all the skills, all the knowledge, everything? Then you say the magic words, and she follows you back to The House, and they erase it all until her next appointment?”

floating through a dark blue sky by Lediona (M, 58,966 w., 15 Ch. || Notting Hill AU || POV John, Celebrity Sherlock, First Date / Time / Kiss, Past Drug Addiction, Angst with a Happy Ending) – Of course, I’d seen his films and always thought he was, well, brilliant -- but, you know, a million miles from the world I live in. Or, when John is the owner of a travel book shop and the famous Sherlock Holmes stops in one day.

Perdition's Flames by i_ship_an_armada (E, 63,435 w., 21 Ch. || Treklock AU, Est. Rel, Genetic Engineering, Angst & Fluff, BAMF!John) – Sherlock would do anything to save him. Risk anything. Give anything. His money, his life. His soul. What he does, though, is change both of their destinies forever. Genetic re-engineering is the only option left. It turns out researchers underestimated the life expectancy and potential abilities of genetically re-engineered subjects. The British government and what would eventually become the United Federation of Planets, however, had not. Part 1 of PF Universe

This Thing All Things Devours by cypress_tree (E, 63,844 w., 15 Ch. || In Time AU || Science Fiction, Dystopian Universe, First Meetings, Action / Adventure, Romance) – In 2169, time is money—literally. Humans are genetically engineered to stop aging at 25, when the numbers on their arm start counting down from one year. When that time is up, they die. The only way to get more time is to earn it, borrow it, or steal it.John Watson lives day-to-day in the crowded slums of Zone 13. He never imagined living any differently—until he meets the practically-immortal Sherlock, and helps him on a case to track a local time-thief...

Being John Watson-ish by elwinglyre (E, 69,902 w., 17 Ch. || Bodysnatcher AU || Author John, Cranky Sherlock, Angst, Sexual Tension, First Kiss / Time, Falling in Love, BAMF John, Past Soldier John, Feelings, Inside Someone’s Brain, Shy Sherlock, Sherlock Loves John, POV Sherlock, Switchlock, Slow Burn, Internal Dialogue, Mental Turmoil) – When consulting detective Sherlock Holmes steps on one toe too many at a crime scene, he's consigned to a desk job in an archaic office on the seventh-and-a-half floor of the New Scotland Yard. It’s in this bleak office that Sherlock discovers a portal into the mind of renowned author John Watson. Grander than his mind palace, this new wonderland affords Sherlock new vistas of experimentation. To learn more about the mystery behind the portal, Sherlock seeks out and befriends Watson. But then it all goes wrong when others find the secret portal door—including the man whose brain he visits.

The Baker Street Nativity by SwissMiss (E, 99,662 w., 23 Ch. || Nativity! AU || Teacher Sherlock / TA John, Pining, Sherlock POV, UST, Angst, Christmas, Music/Song Fic, Anal / BJ’s, First Kiss / Time) – Fusion between Sherlock (BBC) and Nativity! (2009 movie starring Martin Freeman). Sherlock is a primary school teacher and John is assigned to be his classroom assistant. Together, they are charged with putting on the school's Nativity play. What could possibly go wrong? Part 1 of The Baker Street Nativity Verse

The Cost of a Wish by slashscribe (E, 102,493 w., 12 Ch. || xxxHolic Fusion || Spirits / Ghosts and Magic, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Soul Mates / Fated Lovers, Adventure, Immortal Sherlock, Powerful John, POV John, Frottage, Wish Granting, Angst with Happy Ending, Nightmares) – John has been plagued by a secret his entire life that has made him feel hopeless until he meets a mysterious, seemingly omniscient man named Sherlock Holmes who owns a wish-granting shop. Their meeting sets off a series of inevitable events that will change the course of both of their lives forever.

The Swan Triad Series by Pennin_Ink (T, 121,660 w. across 3 works || Swan Lake AU || Magical / Fairy Tale AU, Romance, Falling in Love, Pining, Psychological Torture, Transformation) – Sherlock and John grow up spending every summer together. Their mothers' attempts to play matchmaker only fuel their mutual resentment and scorn. But then, one summer.

Colors by Quesarasara (E, 140,537 w., 17 Ch. || Pleasantville-Inspired AU || Soulmates, Colour Bonds, Alternating POV, Angst, Fluff, Pining, Case Fic, Medical Procedures) – Everyone on earth is born with eyes that see in black, white, and an endless series of greys. When you meet your soulmate, you finally see the world in color. We're all searching for the person who brings color to our lives. John and Sherlock are no exception. Part 1 of The Colors 'Verse

Mise en Place by azriona (M, 161,004 w., 28 Ch. || Restaurant (Kitchen Nightmares) AU || Sherlock is Gordon Ramsay / Celebrity Sherlock, Restauranteur John, Harry Plays Prominent Role, Alternating POV, Mutual Pining, Cranky Sherlock, Bed Sharing, Slow Burn) – John Watson had no intentions of taking over the family business, but when he returns from Afghanistan, battered and bruised, and discovers that his sister Harry has run their restaurant into the ground, he doesn't have much choice. There's only one thing that can save the Empire from closing for good – the celebrity star of the BBC series Restaurant Reconstructed, Chef Sherlock Holmes. Part 1 of Mise en Place

Proving A Point by elldotsee & J_Baillier (E, 186,270 w., 28 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Me Before You Fusion || Medical Realism, Insecure John, Depression, Romance, Angst, POV John, Sherlock Whump, Serious Illness, Doctor John, Injury Recovery, Assisted Suicide, Sherlock’s Violin, Awkward Sexual Situations, Alcoholism, Drugs, Idiots in Love, Slow Burn, Body Image, Friends to Lovers, Hurt / Comfort, Pain, Big Brother Mycroft, Intimacy, Anxiety, PTSD, Family Issues, Psychological Trauma, John Whump, Case Fics, Loneliness, Pain) – Invalided home from Afghanistan, running out of funds and convinced that his surgical career is over, John Watson accepts a mysterious job offer to provide care and companionship for a disabled person. Little does he know how much hangs in the balance of his performance as he settles into his new life at Musgrave Court. Part 1 of the Care And Companionship series

[jobean12-blog]

After Class

Pairing: Professor Barnes x reader x Professor Blackwood (it’s a Professor party!)

Word Count: 1,135

Summary: The new semester starts and your first class is one you’re very excited about, turns out you have more than one reason to be. 

Author’s Note: This is for the HBC’s @the-ss-horniest-book-club continuation of drunk drabbles and the amazing prompt below sent in by the lovely @buckstaybucky This was way to fun and I just could write about these two ALL DAY FOREVER! I hope you like this and thank you all for reading! Much love always! ❤❤❤

Warnings: flirting, teasing, implied smut...

You stand outside the door and try to catch your breath, silently berating yourself for being late to the very first meeting of what you hoped would be your favorite senior seminar, Renaissance Literature. It was already 10 minutes past the start time, and you cringe when the door creaks loudly with your arrival. The classroom was small, only about 10 other students present, all their eyes turning your way when you enter.

With an audible swallow you look down at your feet and shuffle toward a desk in the front corner. The sound of a throat clearing gets your attention and you’re met with two pairs of piercing blue eyes, the men they belong to akin to something straight out of a fantasy. “And you must be miss y/l/n?” You focus your gaze on the professor who spoke, his hands on his hips and a slight furrow to his brow as he looks you over.

“Yes, sorry I’m late professor,” you say quietly, sitting at the desk. He completely ignores your apology and runs his fingers down the length of his tie. “I’m Professor Blackwood and this is my colleague Professor Barnes. We’ll be teaching your seminar this semester.” You nod and force a smile, your interest quickly drawn away when Professor Barnes speaks. “And we don’t tolerate tardiness. Don’t let it happen again.”

Nibbling on the corner of your finger you straighten your shoulders, “yes sir.” He seems more than satisfied with that answer, the corner of his mouth turning up ever so slightly as he fixes his glasses. “Very good. Now, where were we?” The rest of the class goes by painstakingly slow, but not because it’s boring. Oh no, far from it. They are engaging and energetic and have a clear love for what they teach, but you can’t focus on any of it, your mind consumed with lewd thoughts about them.  

You anxiously tap your pen to the keyboard of your laptop and your foot is bouncing on the bar of the small desk repeatedly. Professor Blackwood walks by, running his hand through his thick caramel hair before casually taking the pencil from between your fingers. He slides it behind his ear and gives you a wink. Your mouth hangs open, your head turning to follow his path down the row. A silky voice draws your back to the front and Professor Barnes is leaning over your desk. “You seem tense y/n. Everything ok?”

Without a care you let your eyes wander over the sharp lines of his jaw and the light peppering of stubble that coats it, the grays that are mixed in making your fingers ache to touch it. “I um, I’m just trying to keep up.” Dragging your eyes back to his you hear Professor Blackwood speak from the back of the room, but it’s muffled through the rush of blood to your ears. “Time to find a group darling.” He moves away from your desk so you can get up and you make your way toward the two left over students, shaking your head to clear it.  

You finish up your group work as the class winds down and go to gather your belongings at your desk. Professor Blackwood walks up next you and holds out the pencil, “I believe this is yours.” Giving him a meek smile, you take the other end and pull, except he doesn’t let go, causing confusion to wash over your features. “What do you say?” Professor Barnes walks over, and your mind goes blank. “I think he’s waiting for a thank you.” You let out a nervous chuckle, “thank you Professor.” He still doesn’t let go.

With your heart hammering in your chest you give the pencil another tug, this time bringing his face closer to yours. “Try again sweetheart.” Having his plump and perfect lips just a few inches away has you searching for your voice, finally managing a soft, “thank you. Sir.” Professor Barnes looks to his colleague, “I told you.” Professor Blackwood runs his tongue over his bottom lip, clearly assessing you. “You’re right Barnes, it sounds luscious coming out of that pretty mouth.”

He let’s go of the pencil and you nearly fall back into the seat of your desk, your eyes scanning the room to see that everyone else has already left. Long fingers grasp your chin and turn your head, “it’s just us doll.” Professor Barnes takes off his glasses and hangs them from his sweater.  “Now, you were late to our class, and we need to discuss why. Meet us in our office in 10 minutes.” With that the two men take their papers and head out, Professor Blackwood calling over his shoulder, “don’t be tardy.”

Checking your phone, you throw your belongings into the bag and run out, hoping to grab some water beforehand. You manage to make it there early, pacing outside the office and looking at your phone every 20 seconds. The door opens at exactly 4:30pm and Professor Blackwood waits on the other side, motioning for you to enter.

You see Professor Barnes seated on the couch at the other end of the room, his appearance relaxed but his clenched jaw telling you he is anything but. You spin on your heel when the door slams, coming face to face with Professor Blackwood. “Right on time. Very good.” His suit jacket is gone, and the top two buttons of his shirt are undone, your hands twitching at your sides, once again longing to reach out.

Professor Barnes pats his thigh and spreads his legs wide, “come over here and have a seat.” You place your things down on the desk and slowly walk over, shyly looking over your shoulder at Professor Blackwood. “Go on kitten.” You stand between his legs and sit down, unsure about what to do with your hands so you clasp them in your lap. Professor Barnes leans forward and brings his lips to your ear, “so tell us why you were late.”

Wringing your hands together and searching for an excuse you come up with nothing, looking between the two men while you worry your bottom lip between your teeth. Professor Blackwood moves to stand in front of you, running his thumb over the swollen flesh and pulling it from your mouth. “No need to worry, we know just how you can make it up to us.”

Shifting on Professor Barnes’ lap you hold back a moan when you feel the flex of his thigh muscle beneath your ass. His hand settles on small of your back, rubbing small circles over the fabric of your shirt. “I hope you’re better at following directions than you are at being on time,” Professor Blackwood purrs before resting against the edge of the desk and undoing his belt.

@aesthetical-bucky @auro-ora @bugsbucky @buckstaybucky @buckys-broody-muffin @buckys-minty-breath @breezy1415 @bucky-on-my-mind @book-dragon-13 @buckys-henley @buckosawrus @chuuulip @eurynome827 @hiddles-rose @hawksmagnolia @hailmary-yramliah @itsunclebucky @ikaris-whore @imgaril-lindru @jhangelface0523 @jewels2876 @loricameback​ @littledarlinhavefaithinme​ @littleredstarfish​ @lokilvrr​ @lorilane33​ @mushyjellybeans​ @addikted-2-dopamine​ @marvelgirl7​ @marvelandotherfandomimagines​ @nano--raptor​ @pinkdiamond1016​ @randomfandompenguin​ @sallycanwait68​ @softpeachbarnes​ @tuiccim​ @the-wayward-robot​ @this-kitten-is-smitten​ @yansi1923​ @emilylyoness​ @scarletsoldierrr​ @hopefuldreamers-world​

[soulmate-game]

is there a story behind the “twelve hours between 7pm and 7am” post? also do you have any recommendations for the tropes you said were your favorite?

Well, like, idk about you. But for me, it’s always been a normal thing to just expect people to be perfectly functioning for over twelve hours. You wake up, go to work or school for at least 8 hours on average, and are expected to continue to stay awake and functioning after you get home. An average workday is, what, 9 to 5? That’s including the time to wake up and get ready and commute. So let’s say that means you wake up at 8am, get ready in half an hour, and take half an hour to arrive at work. (Obviously this is nowhere near perfect, a lot of female-presenting individuals will take at least an hour to get ready, depending on whether or not they wear makeup and how much/little/how they apply said makeup. Not including commute time). So that’s being awake from 8am to 5pm, not including any time you might spend for breakfast or lunch if you eat those meals (I don’t eat breakfast but that’s a discussion for another day).

And then of course, you have dinner sometime after 5pm. This varies from household to household, area to area, and culture to culture. I live in central Texas, so I’ve known families who eat dinner at 5:30pm every single day, and other families who don’t eat dinner until 9 or 10pm. Personally, I think a good 7 or 8pm dinner is good timing. But that’s neither here nor there.

After dinner, you just hang out. Do hobbies, game, socialize with family maybe. This is the time for going out with friends, seeing the town and having fun. Most people don’t end their day and go to sleep until at least 10 or 11pm. Which means, from 8am to 10 or 11pm, they are expected to be fully awake and functioning and productive. That’s at least 14 hours of productivity. Or, if you are a night owl and stay up until around 1am— 17 hours. Yet we are also supposed to get “8-9 hours of sleep”—

When? Fucking when? Because this is not at all a normal schedule. Technically, what I wrote constitutes what should be a “normal day” and allows for that much sleep. But how many of us actually stick to that schedule? It’s much more normal for me to meet people who wake up at 5am and don’t go to sleep until midnight. And when they deviate, when they get more sleep, they make comments about being lazy or they get mad at themselves for not staying awake the “appropriate” or the “normal” amount of time. It’s frustrating. Because people normalize staying up from 5am to well past 5pm, but thinking about the difference between 7pm and 7am being only twelve hours brings into focus the fact that twelve hours is half of an entire day. The difference between super early morning and mid evening. The difference between dinner and breakfast. The difference between being firmly in today versus tomorrow.

We should be allowed to relax more. And keep weird ass hours if that’s what our schedule calls for. If you get up at 4:30am and your work day ends at noon or 1pm, you should be able to go to bed by 7 or 8pm and not feel “lame” or ashamed or “lazy” for it. If you don’t wake up until 10am or later for work, own the fact that you don’t go to sleep until well after midnight. You don’t have to feel ashamed or make excuses for being up until 3 or feel like something is wrong with you or endure being called insomniac if you aren’t.

Idk just idle wonderings of a random ass person.

[dacuslucy]

sup bitches, tumblr user xonar-verse has written lover songs as tflc characters/ships at 10:30pm and is presenting it to you for unknown reasons!! (copy and pasted exactly from her docs!!)

i forgot that you existed - idk why am i even doing this i hate everything

cruel summer - idk you tell me (in case you can’t tell it’s late and i’m writing this because i wANT TO)

lover: heah 💞

the man: hero. it’s hero.

the archer: tessa, i’d say?

i think he knows: bitch, they’re gay. idk.

miss americana and the heartbreak prince: calero, i don’t take constructive criticism. 

paper rings: look honestly this is jolly but since it’s tflc.. nope. jolly.

cornelia street: NOW I WANNA DO A HEAH AU TO THIS SONG- heah!!

death by a thousand cuts: probably heah right after the war started (after tessa’s funeral)

london boy: again they’re all gay

soon you’ll get better: platonic chase/tessa. i cry when i imagine it. i cry when i listen to this song. i cRYYYYYY

false god: heah..and calero? 

you need to calm down: all of them just bein gay and vibin the haters away tbh

afterglow: THIS IS THE HEAH SONG, THIS IS T H E HEAH SONG. THEEEEEEEEE HEAH SONG. AAAAAAAAAA IT’S THEM IT’S THEM IT’S THEM IT’S THEM

me: hmmmm calero!

it’s nice to have a friend: heah 💞

daylight: leahhhhhhhhhhhh and heroooooooooooooooooooo (but also jolly because. holly’s gold light. d a y l i g h t)

[thanatophobia-thoughts]

Daily life with Thanatophobia!

I was asked how to “cope” with Thanatophobia, and really, that’s what all of this blog is about. In particular, I was asked how to cope with the idea of eternity and non-existence. I don’t have a good answer for that. I wish I did. It’s my fear, as well. I just have tools that I use.

Perhaps the best way to show those tools is to compare what my life was like pre-November, to what it is now.

Pre-November 2020, between June and November (when things were really bad), my life involved going to work, sending messages to my health team, checking symptoms on WebMD, overreacting to anything my mom or dad experienced, worrying about all the things I hadn’t gotten to do yet, making plans for if I have a year left to live and realizing the pandemic is ruining all of them, suffering from the pandemic in general, and feeling as if I had no one to talk to because I couldn’t see anyone. I would occasionally distract myself with video games, but I couldn’t focus. I had difficulties sleeping and spent many nights crying.

November 2020, I start to break down and realize I can’t go on like this. There were other breakthroughs before this time, involving starting therapy, and starting to take birth control, which has substantially helped with pain management, thus helping my anxiety.

My weeks now have structure. I can start to make plans again. I have a routine.

My usual weekday involves: waking up, going about my morning routine, exercise (sometimes), start work, meditate either at 10:30am or 3:30pm for 10 minutes, lunch at 1pm, drink an average of ~60-70oz of water/juice/milk/latte/etc., get off work, exercise (if not in the morning), work on any writing I have to do, eat dinner around 7pm-8pm (working on getting it closer to 7pm), shower, turn on something to watch, and prepare for sleep.

Wednesdays I also do some errand running, and sometimes therapy.

Thursdays involve organizing my meal plan for the week and going grocery shopping.

Friday usually involves a treat, like curry, sushi, Impossible Whopper – food I don’t have to make. It also involves a few clean-up chores before going out to get food.

Saturdays and Sundays involve video games during what are weekday work hours.

I’ll usually find ways to work in reading comics or manga, though I’m behind on that. Sunday also includes making the meals for the week (Buddha bowls lately). I want to get back into just reading novels, but I still haven’t been able to do that since I started working from home.

The death anxiety hits in moments around sleep time, which is why I tend to keep the TV on. It keeps me distracted for a while. When it fails, I’ll resort to other things, like turning on a show that I haven’t seen before so I can focus on it. This delays sleep and I don’t enjoy this much. I also have melatonin supplements, ASMR, and things like that which can help.

It doesn’t always work.

I’ve found that restoring a routine, meditation, and getting back on track with taking care of myself have helped immensely.

Pre-November, I wasn’t thinking much about what I’d eat. I’d go to the grocery store without a list, or a list of comfort foods, and that was that.

I wasn’t exercising.

I would vary between days I went to get food at the grocery store. It wasn’t great. 

Routine has helped me, because it offers me the illusion of control. I know any day I could die. I know any day, this could be it. I could go to the grocery store, and get hit by another car, and die.

When I think of it, though���of course, I’m upset, but would I do anything different? Would I rather go back to having a life without routine, without this illusion of control, where I was suffering daily, for hours on end? No, obviously I wouldn’t.

My time of suffering has become limited and far more manageable.

There are still days of terrible sleeplessness and restlessness. There are still nights of crying. There are still frustrations with the things I haven’t done. And there’s the ever present fear of the End, that is the End. Not the end of a video game that can be replayed, not the end of a book that can be re-read, but The End.

The Experience is Over, never to be enjoyed again.

My cat Mashpotatoes will never experience life again. When I want it to feel real, I think of that. It’s as close as I can get to touching what that’s like. I have two other cats now, Tarkin and Eriadu, and I love them. Their presence does not replace Mashpotatoes, though. Not that I wish not to have them in my life, or would trade one for the other – far from it. I have enjoyed each of them, uniquely.

Tarkin is my fierce mouser who is timid and prances around the house. Tarkin is the cat we shame for getting stuck in vents.

Eriadu is the cuddly sadist who drowns mice. Eriadu has the loudest purr I’ve ever heard. Eriadu is bolder than her brother.

And Mash was the most affectionate cat I knew, but she hated all other animals. Every human was her friend. She had the most calming blue eyes, and a cry that sounded like an infant – though she was Siamese, so that’s to be expected. She was with me through school, and died shortly after I was done with it. She lived with me for at least fifteen years, though I suspect she was at least sixteen. 

And she will never live again. She will never return to me, or to anyone. She will no longer kill doves, or sleep besides me as I play video games. I will never hear her meow again.

I’m not okay with it, but I cannot change it.

Just as I cannot change that I was not there to celebrate Christmas one last time with my grandmother Mimi, and she will never know how sorry I am. She will never know anything.

How do I live, day to day, knowing this?

I just do.

I remind myself that they are indeed gone. I will one day be gone. And I will one day be nutrients for life. I go about my routine, and face these fears at night, and think of how nice it was to know them – Mimi and Mash. How nice it is to have my parents, for parents. How much I adore my Tarkin and Eria. I think of the preciousness of living now, with Star Wars and Lord of the Ring films.

I think of what good I know.

There is good I will miss.

But happiness, as a feeling, is the same. So is gratitude.

I am missing out on experiences in the future. I have missed out on experiences in the past.

That is our lot in life.

But we have gotten to live – and what a wonder that is.

I’ve found my way to help combat this dread in routine, in meditations, in thankfulness, and in not hiding from it. Yes, it’s terrible, yes it still makes me tear up, but it’s no longer ruling my every day.

This is the progress I’ve made.

This is the progress I am still making, because this is an EFFORT to stay true to these commitments to myself, when any day I could backslide because it’s easier to do less.

This is the progress I hope for you – I hope you find your tools in routine or spontaneity, in positive thinking, and in whatever else helps you.

I hope Death Anxiety ceases to rule your every day.

[hotarutranslations]

Hiru Nan Desu!-san

Evening

Nihon TV "Hiru Nan Desu!" I got to go on the live show💛

It was a lottt of fun for a full 2 hours

Nagashima Spa Land Definitely go! I'm definitely going! Everyone was like that on location, from the VTR, It was fun and charming🌻

UFO Slider.. I wonder how many laps I could do..

I think I have a strong core because I dance🕺

If we went together on a location shoot, I feel like I would slide the longest! that is, my mysterious confidence lol

With that, I really, Want to go! Its nice! It seems fun!

…that's how it felt🥺🫶🏻

Did everyone enjoy it too~~

Before, on Hiru Nan Desu Thursday! I got to appear on it but, (a food report with a dance, I did 10 kendama in a row, I really remember that it was fun🤍)

This time, on Hiru Nan Desu Wednesday! as well, It was warm, it was 2 hours where we laugh a lottt Also, it was 2 hours where I felt like I was on summer vacation the most!

It was overflowing during the show but,

This week, Hiru Nan Desu x Detective Conan Collab Week

…I'm really happy about the timing, I'll remember being able to make a guest appearance👓🎀

I love Conan and solving mysteries👓🎀

I'm excited to solve the mystery, with Conan's friends!!! Since I delcared it,

I'm nervous about solving the mystery~~😂⚠️

Thank you very much, for letting me answer one…!

I brought my plushies with me🤍🤍🤍 (I'm sorry for the chain covering Ran-chan's face..)

In the morning,

Fuji TV "Nonstop!" I got to introduce Morning Musume '24💚

Thank you very much💚

Tsunku Punchline…

That is already a power word…

lol

Introducing us in this way, I'm really happy about it thank you very much💚

On August 30th, At Rakuten Mobile Park Miyagi,

Ceremonial Pitch⚾️

I'll be doing it but,

Further, many other event appearances, have been announced today

Details are here

I can spin a lot of towels again!!

I can dance to the team song again!!

Ha--!! I'm happy!!

By all means, by all means, Please come hang out in support🥹❤️

Its August 30th (Fri)

I'll be waiting!

With today, I had a shoot after the live show,

it was reallyyy fun..🫣🤍

Look forward to it

🕺

Play▶️List

Debut song 48th Pyoko Pyoko Ultra~

I danced a lot on my own..

🕺

Graduation Announcement Blog🐣🪽

Hello! Station #531 I also talk about my graduation in this video

📺Hello Pro Dance Every other Thursday at 11:30PM~

📺Sendai Broadcast "Ara Ara Kashiko" Ishida Ayumi Goes~! I appear once a month as part of the AraKashi Family

The previous shows, and makings, are on OX VIDEO STORE!

Thank you for following.. Instagram💙🩵

💿 August 14th new single✨ "Nandaka Sentimental na Toki no Uta/saiKIYOU"

🪩Hello! Project 2024 Summer ALL OF US "Vega" "Altair" From July 13th~September 1st Traveling To 7 Cities Nationwide All Hello! Project groups are performing🔥

🪩Sawayaka Goro Birthday Event September 8th on the day of Goro-san's birthday🎂 I'll be appearing as a guest at the birthday event🎂

🪩"Morning Musume '24 Concert Tour Autumn WE CAN DANCE!"

Its Ishida Ayumi's last tour💙 I'm looking forward to seeing you

🪩"ROCK IN JAPAN FESTIVAL 2024 in HITACHINAKA" September 22nd GRASS STAGE 10:30AM~

→Tickets are on general sale

📻Morning Musume '24 Morning Jogakuin ~Houkago Meeting~

Airs Every Saturday, On Radio Nihon at 12:00AM~

Past Broadcast Episodes Are Available →Program Details

I visited as a guest🪽 "Sayashi Riho and The Time From Now On" presented by Meiji Bulgarian Yogurt

📻I visited as a guest🤍 Harami-chan no Harami Fan Radio♪

see you ayumin <3 https://ameblo.jp/morningmusume-10ki/entry-12864493589.html