#part of me is like. 'hans is a professional but man if he isn't trying to earn brownie points' alsdkfn

[sarah-denial-cq]

What makes you enjoy slave Leia so much? Merely a strong woman in a humiliating, revealing costume, or is there anything more to it?

Slave Leia fixed me.

I don't think I have a lot to say about it that isn't obvious, since I'm kinda stupid. But it's more than just a strong woman being put in a humiliating revealing costume.

First is the in universe concept (uh, I guess, spoilers for like a forty year old movie). It's not just that Leia is captured and put in the bikini. She's captured while in the process of thinking she can be strong and capable, that she can save someone. The outfit and voice changer she used while trying to rescue Han covered up her sex and her weakness. The contrast with that is immense. And when she's caught, people *laugh*. It's a big *joke*. It's not a serious she did a good try but jabba's crack team of security were better. It's like a surprise prank that they all pulled on her. Compare the defiance from when Vader first captures her on the blockade runner in EP IV, when she is strong in the face of capture after a battle well fought, to the face she makes when jabba catches her. No defiance. Just embarrassment, disgrace, weakness, confusion, stupid girl. Sorry I'm kinda masturbating while writing this.

And then she is stripped and put in a tacky bikini with arm bands and hair bands and a collar and leash. Fine. But she is exposed in front of Luke. The one who she was trying to be all tough girl equal around in EP IV and v. He is calm, composed, powerful, which just makes her weakness and stupidity more evident. Of course she couldn't save a man. But one could save her, at the price of seeing her stripped down to a waist and pair of tits.

And that's edge edge that's what brings this into the real world. It completely destroys Leia's character for the entire series. Ask any man who's watched star wars to describe the most iconic scene for Luke and it's idk his training with Yoda or his blowing up the death star or whatever. None of them will say him shirtless and weak and vulnerable in the bacta tank. But ask the same question about Leia and you will get one answer. If it had been her character from the start it wouldn't wreck me quite so much. But it isn't, it's two movies of.building her up as a badass strong independent woman and then haha no you stupid girls who thought this universe took you seriously this is how everyone sees you. The fact that it took away and overwrote and deleted and replaced oh god everything that she did in the eyes of the male audience the film was marketed.to edge is she's literally on a chain looking up at the guy she was pretending to be an equal to just like how I have to be lower and beneath and

And on top of all of that was Carrie's discomfort real world with how revealing the costume was to her professional colleagues it's literally wear this bra and skirt with no panties in front of people you pretend edge are workplace equals wet and pose while kneeling in it for the official promotion materials bark and inspire generations of girls to think that when they attend conventions about their hobbies they should dress up like subservient edge sluts and pose in huge undifferentiated groups for photos and anyways that's part of why I like slave Leia so much thanks for the ask.

[meltedbluecaterpillar]

Leona Kingscholar - Smut Alphabet

A/N: These are my personal thoughts and Headcanons. You don’t have to agree with me. The original alphabet is here.

A - Aftercare = (what they're like after sex)

Leona may seem like he doesn't give a damn but I promise he does in his own way.

He will press kisses all over your face and make sure you're okay. This is a rare situation where he makes you something to eat. He doesn't ask Ruggie! Mostly because this is intimate between the two of you, involving someone else feels strange... He will give you a wipe down if you need it but his animal brain says he should use his tongue. But he won't.

He is a gentleman and a prince and he knows to be polite even if he appears to be an asshole. But Leona is expecting you to clean him up too. It goes both ways baby!~!

B - Body Part = (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partners.)

Leona's favorite body part of his isn't actually a body part. It's his hair. He takes good care of it and he loves the feeling of your hands running through it. Twirling a finger around one of his braids or even when you tug on it during sex. He loves it a lot it makes him horny when you play with his hair. Or even just more in love with you than you might expect.

His favorite part of you is your mouth. How your lips get puffy and wet from kissing. Your frowns, your smiles, your nubby teeth, your pink tongue. The words that leave it and of course the things he puts inside. Leona loves getting head from you, he won't say it. But he is expecting it every time he sees you.

C - Cum = (anything to do with cum basically)

Leona says he doesn't want kids constantly but he is allergic to the pullout method. He is a beastman, it's hardwired within his brain to mate and mount. It feels much better when he finishes inside.

If you do dislike it (beastmen/fae/mermen don't tend to believe in condoms due to genitalia differences and its a hassle. Also most men just don't like condoms) Leona will agree to cum on your skin. He prefers that little spot just below your belly button and he lazily just drops his cock against you. How naughty.

D - Dirty Secret = (a dirty secret of theirs)

Leona will take this to the grave. Or maybe he'll tell you years later if he feels comfortable. But... He does like breeding. With the intent to make a baby.

He cannot fight his instincts to mate and breed and he despises it less than he claims. Leona loves you a lot and he does adore his nephew. And the moment you dote on Cheka he suddenly starts picturing little versions of the two of you.

Leona would never force you to have his baby. And even if it isn't physically possible between you two he would love to adopt. But he can't tell you this stuff. You'll get sappy and gross, mentioning how big his heart actually is. He can't stand it.

E - Experience = (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

Leona is a very handsome man but he was raised as a gentleman first. I like to imagine maybe when he went home during a break he had an entanglement with a servant or maybe there was a 'Royal Bedwarmer' hired. But I don't think he's a virgin. Honestly with all of his confidence I would be shocked. But he's also not an idiot and he is very good at asking indirectly to get the things he might want from you.

So he'll try different positions with you, teasing you with a smirk or even mumbling in your ear; asking if it's good for you. If you like it or if you would feel even better in a different position. He does read books and watch porn with humans in it. A beastman body isn't the same as a human's. Not quite. But he learns quick. Leona is a prodigy after all.

F - Favorite Position = (exactly what it says)

Save a horse, ride a lion.

Leona is a professional when it comes to getting out of doing something that requires him to put in unnecessary effort. He loves when you crawl into his lap and ride him. Giving him the perfect view of your face when you roll your hips and steady your hands on his abdomen for support. Even when you get tired and lay against him, it's perfect for him to hold you in place as he jerks into you. Feet planted on the bed as he makes you take him all the way.

Reverse cowgirl is good too, but he would rather see your face and how you look so in love as you orgasm.

G - Goofy = (are they more serious in the moment? are they more humourous?)

I think Leona can have a little laugh during sex. But it's very uncommon. It can be a mood killer or distracting so the sex won't even be something he's interested in anymore.

He can move things along just fine, but if you're goofing around too much he'll end up going soft.

H - Hair = (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes?)

Leona is a beastman so shaving isn't really something he think's about. My Leona that lives in my mind tends to have stubble. A scratchy face that tickles you when he kisses you. If he has to attend something important he will shave but usually he has a little facial hair.

Below the belt? Again he is a beastman. Shaving is pointless. He does have a nice dark happy trail unless he decides to shave/he's in the mood/you dislike the amount. He doesn't let it get unruly but Leona never minded having a ton of hair. So he lets it grow until he thinks it's too much or if you tell him you don't like how much of it there is.

I - Intimacy = (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect?)

Leona can be such a Cupid, it's unexpected. Usually he's viewed as rough and carnal but Leona seems very into closeness. This doesn't mean you only get slow lovemaking with Leona, he can give it to you however you want.

You prefer roughness? Of course my liege. He'll give it to you in the nastiest way possible. His hand around your throat as he belittles you. A weak willed Herbivore. Some cheap bitch he snagged off a corner during a night drive. You're just free hole, so moan and cry and show him a good time. (If it gets to be too much, he'll stop at any point!~!)

I personally like a softer Leona. He rubs his hands all over your body as he whispers in your ear. Telling you how good you make him feel. His cock buried inside with slow ruts of his hips. How attractive you are and how he's so happy to have you all to himself. Kissing your face and maybe a gentle bite or two.

J - Jack Off = (masturbation headcanon)

Leona will masturbate if he's in the mood but it's not often if he has you around. Why use a toy or his hand like some Neanderthal when you have a perfectly good mouth he can put to use? Of course if you deny him he will pout and sulk... But he will retreat. You'll end up with a short string of frustrated messages of him telling you that he's horny and what he wants to do to you.

K - Kink = (one or more of their kinks)

Breeding (because Mother Nature has cursed him) and power play. Please, lower your torches and pitchforks I can explain.

Power play is something that does require a lot of trust exercises. It falls under a form of BDSM but it's the very top layer. I see Leona's preferences falling under him being in charge in one way or another. He was always overlooked and second best so in the bedroom he get's to be your king. He likes when you submit to him sexually, or even 'forcing' you to submit. Brat taming would be somewhere on his list but he prefers you face down ass up, telling him how badly you need it. No fight necessary. Since you love him so much, of course you want to offer up your hole.

L - Location = (favorite place to do the do)

He loves the Botanical Garden's or his room. His dorm or at the palace. Leona is very possessive over you in his own way. I do think that Leona would be very irritated with someone watching so he tries to pick very secluded spots. Everyone knows the Botanical Garden's is his favorite place. So Leona will lure you there with a flick of his tail and soft promises for a good time. Quickly folding you in half with your feet facing the sky. Only the flowers and moss know what kind of naughty things happened in there...

His bedroom is also just his favorite place to be regardless. He has a very big bed. His scent is on everything and he likes it when you're wrapped up in his sheets with him. There could be a circumstance where he catches someone watching and he might entertain. But only if you don't seem to mind it. You come first.

M - Motivation = (what turns them on, gets them going?)

Lions are actually very social creatures. But Leona is a big loner type. When you show him you're interested in being closer, just twirling a finger in his hair or sitting on his lap... It makes him excited. The thought of you being interested in his company is what get's him going.

Even if your intentions are innocent and you just like being around him or touching he can't help the way it makes his cock throb in his pants.

N - No = (something they wouldn’t do, turns offs)

Leona does not share. So do not ask him. The idea of a threeway or anything like that pisses him off. "Am I not enough?" It's a big ego bruising for him since his whole life he's played No. 2. He would be okay with magically cloning himself and giving you that kind of fantasy. But if you mention wanting to bring in Malleus or Vil he most likely would break things off with you.

Lions in the wild are polyamorous yes. But Leona is a greedy man.

O - Oral = (preference on giving or receiving, skill, ect.)

Leona loooooves when you gag and spit all over his cock. How it juts against the side of your cheek and how you have to stroke what you can't swallow. He holds the back of your head to mindlessly guide you or he'll just grab you and piston in and out of your throat. Making you enjoy the taste of his thick sperm on your tongue. If he's in a bad mood; he;'ll pinch your nose and stop you from breathing. Forcing you to swallow it all down.

Leona will give you oral if he's in the mood. Or if you're confident making a suggestion that you would like it. His tongue is rougher than a human's so that is part of the reason he hasn't tried. He isn't skilled in giving because he has had a single partner before you. And that didn't require him to reciprocate service. But that doesn't mean he can't figure it out. Leona will surprise you one day by offering you a 'reward' of some kind. One that requires you to take your pants off.

P - Pace = (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual?)

Leona usually has you riding him, so you would set the pace. He does have a preference for faster strokes that rub against your insides and make you scream. But he won't mind following a request of yours.

But there are times where he does what he wants. He could punish you with slow deep strokes that drive you insane or he treat you roughly while rewarding you with something aggressive.

Q - Quickie = (their opinions of quickies, how often, etc.)

He likes them but not as an often thing. Leona will try to mount you when he's in the mood, and you're free to do the same. Sex isn't always something that involves romance.

Humans are technically animals to. The urge to fuck is just something that happens.

R - Risk = (are they game to excitement? do they take risks, etc.)

Leona will listen to your requests and ideas but he is firm with whatever answer he gives you if he views it as unsafe in anyway. He will lightly choke you and manhandle you, but he isn't going past that violence wise in bed. He cares about you a lot and also he is a prince with a shitty enough reputation. Being caught fucking in an odd place is something he is conscious of. As often as Leona says he does what he wants; he isn't stupid.

S - Stamina = (how many rounds can they go for? how long can they last?)

Lions have great stamina but Leona is a depressed person. So we need to be realistic. I think he would be satisfied with 1 or 2rounds before going to bed. Lots of foreplay.

However if he is in a rut that will change. He is insanely horny regardless of his usual stamina and the number grows and grows. I would say maybe... 6 to 8 rounds? You are a human and that kind of exhaustion can be unbearable. By rounds, I do mean times Leona can orgasm before starting again. So it doesn't have to be penetration, but you have to keep up if you offer to help him out one of the days. Tapping out can be very difficult when a beastman is out of it. Be careful.

T - Toys = (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themself?)

This was inspired by a friend but Leona is rich. Unlimited money hack. I think he would have maybe two different fleshlights. One he bought so he didn't have to use his hand like some cave man. The second one is custom to be modeled after you. The same skin tone and everything. He does of course have lube, and he isn't against using it. But the kind that heats up. Adding a newer stimulation that's wet and hot. Very arousing.

He would buy you a toy if you asked him. But he also wants to see what it is. And Leona wants to use it on you. A lion dildo? Barbs and all? Leona will work it in and out of you until you can't take it anymore. You wanted it so badly, make good use of it.

U - Unfair = (how much they like to tease)

Leona loves to tease you. Your reactions are so, so yummy. He isn't the type to beat around bush for something he wants. So he'll tell you directly with a low growl how he wants to split you open like a fresh peach.

He does like when you become needy, pawing at him and making suggestive comments. Leona sees how hungry you are for some adult intimacy and he likes making you wait for it until he's ready. Just because he's an asshole.

V - Volume = (how loud are they? what sounds they make, etc.)

Lions in the wild will roar while mating. They do this to tell other males to stay away! A form of possessiveness. I think Leona starts quiet and he does have the ability to be quiet, but depending on his mood he may stop caring.

He loves knowing that he's the one that makes you feel good. No one else can do what he can. Leona moans in your ear, grunts and growls, very 'beastly' when he's on top of you. In a situation where you're riding him, he usually will throw his head back into the pillow and tell you how much he loves you bouncing in his lap. But he isn't very chatty normally.

W - Wild = (a random headcanon on the character)

Leona has a preference for a human partner. But he really isn't picky. He does watch porn and usually his searches are related to his own species but one day he stumbled upon 'Lion x Human' videos.

He hasn't been with a human prior to you so it was a little shocking for him to see. Of course, it's all acting but interspecies dating isn't something that usually happens. So when he watched the video he didn't know that humans liked this or that. So after getting some Post Nut Clarity he realized he had an attraction to humans over his own species. He wants to see those faces and learn about there erogenous zones. He loves the contrast between himself and a human and how different yet so compatible your bodies are.

It's erotic to think about...

X - X-ray = (lets see whats going on under those clothes)

A wise man once said; "If his dick slaps his thigh when he walks, I shall listen when he talks.

Leona doesn't realize he's that big because he's lived with that monstrosity since forever. It's nice and big, too big honestly. A pleasant thickness that stretches you with a delicious soreness. Barbs lining his length in a uniform pattern that rub and stimulate your insides until your almost screaming from pleasure.

At first you balked at the size. Shaking your head in refusal at the idea of trying to force something like that inside of you. But you were pleasantly surprised by Leona's dedication towards something he actually wants.

Y - Yearning = (how high is their sex drive?)

I put on my nerd glasses for this one. So lions have their mating season in the 'cooler and wetter season'. Which is late November until about February? Lions live in the savannah so they don't have to worry about snow of course. Lions also will mate on occasion through the year but they can copulate up to 50 times a day. Every 20 to 30 minutes they're fucking.

Leona is a beastman so lets shrink that number down. I think that Leona has a moderate drive, it was very low in the past since he had no interest in that sort of thing before you came into his life. Now he does enter a rut, but he's not a crazy monster for a week. Think of it like... Leona is doing the male version of ovulation from late November until Valentine's Day.

He rubs his head against you and bites your cheek. Pawing at your chest and rubbing his hips against your ass, telling you how badly he wants to be inside of you. But after February it's like nothing ever happened. Leona is cured.

Z - Zzz = (how quickly they fall asleep afterward)

Leona has no reason to stay awake once you say you're fine. Sex is exhausting enough, nap time is required. Lions are very social and shockingly cuddly big cats so he wants to sleep beside you. He won't mind staying up and talking for a bit but he's ready to rest and pull you close.

The first strike is him turning so his back faces you if you won't shut up for the night. The second is him commanding bed time. The final strike is a walk of shame back to Ramshackle.

But he would rather have you stay in bed with him. He won’t be interested in a shower depending on the situation but he will wipe you down if you need to.

[0a5-the-glue]

Scars To Your Beautiful

Pairings: Lee Minho x Han Jisung x 9nth member! Amab! Reader

Genre: Angst, friends to lovers

Synopsis: You are the one that every members praised for being strong, for your unshakable optimism. You were the one that usually helped the other's out. You were the one that they considered as the shoulder they could always cry on. But how do they react when their strong and brave members becomes the shell of the man he usually was? When he's the one that needs a shoulder to cry on?

Warnings: !!SA!! (Talk about it, mention the use of a blindfold but don't go into the details.) !!MDI!!

Words: 2.2K

A/n: English isn't my first language, so there's risks of mistakes for the use of a word or how to write it. I'm not a professional author, I'm just writing as a hobby in my free time. And yes, if I keep on posting, there are high chances that I continue abording heavy topics like this one. I use the subject about S.A, I don't think I used it badly, but I apologize in advance if I was in any way offensive about it.

___________________________________

Chapter 1- Secret's out.

As an Idol, you had to be happy the second there was a camera was pointed toward you. It's part of the job.

At first, you didn't worry about, you are a person that likes smiling and laugh around. The Stays called you, along with Felix and Jisung, 'The Sunshine Triplets'.

But these days, you lost all that sparkly energy your fans and friends always loved. You have been quieter that you've ever been, of course the boys noticed, but they thought it was just the pressure of the job that was getting to you.

That wasn't it at all. A couple weeks ago, you were sexually assaulted. And you didn't tell anyone, deciding that you'd keep it for yourself. To avoid being a burden for the group.

But that decision led to your negative thoughts taking over any rationnal ones.

Looking happy became straining. You masked your pain and doubts, became the perfect Idol everyone thought and expected you to be.

The nine of you were sitting in a living room, on live with any Stays that were available to attend, but you kept on spacing out.

You thought no one would notice, but Minho saw right through you. "Come on," he says in his usual annoyed tone, taking your hand in his, dragging you along with him.

You hum and follow him, still lost in your thoughts.

He stops when he's in a place where no one could see you or hear you two talk. He lets go of your hand before turning around to face you. "What's going on? You've been spacing out since the beginning of the live." He crosses his arms, staring at you in the eyes, seeking for an answer.

"Huh?" You ask, finally concentrating on what's in front of you. "What was that Min'? Sorry, I was thinking." You let out a small laugh.

Minho doesn't wait and grab your hands, squeezing them gently. "Look," he breathes in and gives you a small smile. "You keep on spacing out since the beginning of the live, you're not that bad usually. Tell me what's wrong. Please?"

You tense and force a smile on your lips. "Just a little insomnia Min'! Nothing that I haven't dealt with before!" You laugh it off.

Minho looks at you with a annoyed expression and sighs. "Stop making excuses, please. There's more happening and we both know that. Don't lie to me, you know I won't judge you, no matter what it is."

The calm, but direct words coming out of Minho's mouth makes you freeze. You turn around, trying to walk back to the boys, ignoring Minho's question. The boy understands soon enough what you're trying to do and grabs your wrist, stopping you from walking away. He makes you turn around so that you face him. "Don't avoid my questions. I just want to help you." He sighs. "How am I supposed to help you if you won't tell me what's wrong?"

"I'm not answering anything that I don't wish to answer. Let me go." You say in a sharper tone then expected, trying to move your arm away from his hold.

"Answer me and I will." He shrugs, tightening his hold slightly. "Stop avoiding and answer, it'll be easier for both of us this way."

When you feel the hold tighten around your wrist, you let out a small cry of pain, you try to get away from his hold, avoiding harsh moves, careful to not hurt yourself more. You hear a small intake of breath coming from Minho before he loosens his hold.

"Why won't you tell me what's going on? Spit it out." He groans. "You know that I don't like when you act like that, I'm here to help Y/nnie." He says with a harsh tone, but his thumb betrays his real feelings as he rubs it against your wrist as if you were made out of glass.

Even though the touch was gentle, the pain was still there. You hiss, placing your free hand on his, pushing it away. Tears are filling your eyes, blurring your vision.

The instant Minho sees the tears in your eyes, his hard and stern expression falls. You can easily see the guilt taking over his features. "Shit." He curses under his breath, "I'm sorry, I didn't know I was holding that hard, sorry." He lets go of your wrist, choosing to grab your hand instead in a delicate hold. He brings your arm up, trying to look for any signs of injuries left because of him.

You try pulling down your sleeve when he places his attention to your wrist, trying to hide the marks that are hidden not that higher on your arm. Of course, the man notices and squeezes your hand tighter. "Let me see." He says in a concerned tone. He places his hands ever so gently on your forearm to lift the sleeve up.

You, on the other hand, started to hyperventilate in panic of him actually seeing what was hidden. You wouldn't accept looking weak in front of your group, your members that always said you were the strong one. "N-no! Minho don't-" Your voice get stuck in your throat, you close your eyes tightly, trying to keep the tears at bay.

Minho's eyebrow furrowed. But the second he saw your panicked state, his eyes widened. You can see that the realized that this was a subject way more serious than he originally thought. "Hey, slow your breathing down, Y/nnie." He murmurs. "Follow mine," he instructs. "Inhale," he takes a deep breath in. "Hold it two seconds for me, and exhale." He puffs the air out.

You look at him panicked, hissing at the pain that you’re feeling now in your entire arm. You silently follow his breathing as you try to pull away and wince when you feel the pain it’s causing. You stay still and look at your arm, not daring to look at the boy standing in front of you. The tears are finally rolling down your cheeks, but your breathing has returned to normal.

The dancer sighs, pushing your sleeve higher. You stop moving your arm around, but you’re more tense than you’ve ever been around him.

Minho could now see the entire length of your arm, covered in bite marks, scratches and there was an imprint that was now purple, shaped like a hand, close to the place he was previously holding. You look at the floor, not ready to face his expression and stay still.

You flinch when you feel his fingers tracing over your wounds and take in a sharp breath. Finally drifting your gaze to him. You could see nothing but pure pain and horror in Minho’s facial expression. You try to say something, but no sound wanted to come out.

“Jesus fucking Christ.” He utters under his breath. 

The silence takes over you two, you could hear the boys still talking in the background, trying to keep the entertainment for the Stays, even though two of their members went missing from the video.

“Minho,” you break the silence with a small and vulnerable voice. “Stop it now.” You take in a sharp breath. “I’ve had enough, please.” 

The boy just let out a broken pained sound, not letting go of your hand. You could see that he was feeling guilty, and that’s what you didn’t want. Everything but that. You were about to say something, but Minho looks at you, the sight breaks your already sore heart. He sees your tears, he lets go of your arm and apologizes.

You back up until your back hits the wall and let out a small breath. You knew that thousands of questions were running freely in his head. But he kept silent. You take that opportunity to slide down the wall, sitting down on the floor, trying to calm yourself down for the upcoming conversation you won’t be able to escape. You find yourself hugging your bent legs, chin on your knees.

“Who..?” Minho asks, looking everywhere but you. 

“I knew only one of them,” You nod, scolding yourself internally for already saying that it wasn’t only one that caused your bruises. “And you know only one of them too.” Your voice was broken, but you didn’t let that stop you. He was right, he needed to know what happened. All of the boys did. 

You look at his reaction and smile sadly when you see him tense. “I’m sorry,” you whisper. Your eyes drift to the boys again and keep your gaze on them as you prepare yourself to let out the words you never thought you’d say one day. You swallow down the lump lodge in your throat before pronouncing the words in a fake careless tone. “I was raped, three weeks ago.”

You can’t see Minho, not ready to face him, but hear his breath quickening. Then there’s some ruffling sounds, before there’s a weight on your left shoulder, Minho’s hair tickles your cheek and neck, his hand hovers one of yours, delicately grabbing it and bringing it to his mouth. His lips tremble as he presses a kiss to the heel of your hand before placing it against his chest.

A small, sad smile forms itself on your lips when you feel his mouth against your palm. That was a thing he always did when he wanted to comfort you, when he was at a loss of words. A silent way of saying that he cared about you and that he’ll stay by your side whenever you needed him.

The slow beating of his heart is bringing you peace and you rest your head on top of his. You shift your weight slightly so that you can lay against him. You move your hand that he was holding so that your fingers could interwine with his.

“You know,” You whisper and clear your throat to keep your voice steady. “I was preparing dinner for you boys when it happened.” You turn your head to look at him. “I asked, y-you know, Eric to help me out.” You stutter slightly but continue, “at first, nothing was weird. I mean, it’s just a friend helping a friend, right?”

Minho squeezes your hand, letting you know that he was there and to take your time. His gaze focused on the side of your face.

“Then you boys called me to say that you’d come home later due to JYP wanting you to train longer. I made the mistake of telling Eric about it.” You swallow thickly. “It’s like he had already planned everything," You bark out a forced laugh, "he just grabbed my waist, pulling me into the living room and opened the door to let two of his friends in.” You murmur. “One of them blindfolded me, and then…” You stay silent, not able to say the next words.

“Y/nnie, I-”

“Please don’t apologize.” You cut him off. “Can we talk about the rest later…?” You ask in a calm tone, your eyelids getting heavy. You lean against the boy a little more until you could place your head against his chest. “Feel so sleepy, haven’t slept in days.” you admit, “feel safe here.” You mutter before slowly drifting to slumber.

_____________

Minho’s P.O.V

He brings his free hand to your head, playing with your hair in a soft touch, humming a song. He looks at the rest of his group, sitting on a couch and talking to the fans, smiling softly.

The boys bid their goodbyes to Stays, waiting for the live to end before rushing to both of you with concerned gazes. Minho raises the hand that is on your head, places his index finger against his lips.

With difficulty, he unties his other hand from your tight grip, watching you intensely to see if you showed any signs of waking up. He takes his phone and texts the boys to make sure their voices won’t wake you.

Min I won’t speak for Y/nnie.  Min But he isn’t feeling well at all. He’ll tell you about it when he’s ready. So don’t shower him with questions when he wakes up.

The boys all look at their phone and frown at Minho’s messages. Chan was about to say something, but the second oldest just shakes his phone, point in it with his free hand.

Channie Alright, I believe your judgment Min. Sungie Okay, do you want me to pick him up to get him to the car, hyung?

Minho smiles softly at the younger boy's offer and nods slowly. Jisung bends down to your level and picks you up slowly, cradling your head to his shoulder. 

Minho gets up and looks at the boys that were staring at your shape with confusion and concern all over their faces. Seungmin looks at him with tears in his eyes, Minho smiles sadly and opens his arms. Seungmin doesn't hesitate to hug him tightly. The boy knew deep down that Seungmin was as observant as he was himself. So if he had a doubt of what really happened to you, Seungmin just got his proof that he was right on the option he dearly hoped was wrong.

“Come  on puppy, we got to go now,” Minho says, his voice wavering. He wanted to stay strong for the younger ones, trying to pass on the message that everything was going to be fine. But how was he supposed to make the other believe it, when he wasn’t even sure himself?

----------------------

Thanks for reading!

[drawbauchery]

The Second Session

fic by cartoons-tothemoon

“So, let’s review, last session, we broke you down to many of your core traits and neuroses.”

“Thanks for reminding me, it’s not like I have the capacity to remember last week.” Skipper muttered.

“Well, now we’re here to build you back up, and work from that onwards.” Hans said. He had his hands folded plainly in his lap, and he’d changed the lighting in the office. Skipper hated it. He hated having to sit across from a smug as shit Hans as he waited calmly and quietly for Skipper to begin talking, with that terrible, blinding light that gave off a strangely clinical feel that makes him more uneasy than anything else. He wonders if Hans would let him sleep for the hour he was meant to spend here. Sure, he’d be paying $35 for a nap, which was crazy in of itself, but he knows from experience that sometimes all you need is a good nap to be a functioning person again.

“I’m not in the position to really diagnose you with anything, and even if I was, I’d still need more time to get to know your mind before I could really prescribe anything for your current conditions.”

“Conditions?”

“Plural. Like children trying to sneak into a cineplex in a trench coat, what was once one turned out to be two or more disorders standing on top of one another’s shoulders. Bouts of aggression and insomnia tied to intense paranoia, a complex that comes from being a leader, and a fear of depending on others. Abandonment issues, repression-“

Skipper waved his hands in a forceful sort of wave, “yes, thank you. Just tell me what to do about it already.”

“What?”

“Just fix me already.” Skipper seemed frustrated. “You’re the one who thinks I’m broken in the first place, the only reason I’m here in the first place is to prevent any future surprise tea parties.”

Hans sighed. They were barely even 5 minutes in, and Hans just knew he was going to be spending the rest of the session constructing arguments for statements Skipper constructed in seconds.

“If this was only to prevent any more…surprise visits from moi, then I would’ve been fine with just the first session. And I think you know that.”

He did. He did know that. Hans suggested the idea of a second session, and so did Skipper, in the way that you do when you’re bonding with people you have a rather hostile history with. No commitment was really stated, which left the ball in Skipper’s court, but what was he supposed to do after that thorough deconstruction, let it simmer in his soul for the rest of his known life?

He couldn’t even let it simmer for a whole week at this point, after all, he was already considering asking RICO of all people if he was too arrogant a leader and intentionally pushing people away.

RICO.

It made sense at the time, Kowalski would question where he was learning such jargon and be able to draw conclusions based on his recent absence, and Private would do nothing but validate him. Because he was just that nice, he supposed.

“Second, it’s not about being “broken” or “fixed” or what have you, the fact of the matter is that you have the most high-stress job in your already high-stress career. As much as I enjoyed our battles in the fish markets of Denmark, it’s not like the experience hasn’t done something to me, or you for that matter.”

Hans sighed, he was already just so exhausted by this…session. He’d even revealed that he too shared in mental health struggles if Skipper was willing to pick up the scraps left behind for him. Skipper looked a little surprised, sure, but fell back into an understood complacency sooner than later.

Was this the closest they were ever going to get to a true understanding of the other?

He supposed he’d have to take it.

“And lastly, I can’t tell you how to “fix” yourself. I’m a therapist, not a life coach. I’m not here to give advice, I’m here to examine your trauma, and give you a better perspective on how to move forward. However, I can’t take those steps for you. You kinda have to figure out a lot of those things on your own.”

Skipper looked positively moody about this, but less in a spoiled, petulant five-year-old sort of way, and more…accepting of it. He looked tired, and less because it was barely just a quarter past 1. It was an abstract tiredness, one not born of resting or restlessness, but a thing all its own.

Skipper sighed. “Then what am I supposed to do?”

“This is a timely process for a reason, Skipper. Many people can spend years in therapy trying to handle these exact issues.”

“I didn’t realize this was a life sentence in the making.” Skipper muttered.

God, this was already such a process. Hans could tell that Skipper couldn’t stand the vagueness of this all. He was an action guy, he wanted an easy solution of doing task A to accomplish thing B, and achieve reward C, and go on with his life.

No, not even an easy solution. A clear solution. Skipper was a problem solver. All of this was already so abstract, and he didn’t even know if he was so vehemently against this whole process just because it was him, or just because it was therapy at all. He even had a client who after a bad experience with a therapist in middle school decided to turn her sessions into stand-up, just because she was already so familiar and so bored with the process.

Maybe that’s what he needed to channel. Therapy in of itself was at the best of times uncomfortable and at the worst of times boring. He was already dealing with a high energy, high stress client, who was uncomfortable as all hell with being there. If he put him back into a comfortable situation, he may or may not get something out of him, and if he doesn’t, at the very least make him more comfortable with spending time with him at all, off the clock, at least.

“What do you like to do, Skipper? In your free-time?”

Skipper eyed him suspiciously. “Uh, why?”

“I’m trying something. Trust me here.”

That could’ve been phrased SO much better, from nemesis to nemesis, but Skipper seemed willing in the moment to run with that trust. “I like working on my combat capabilities, driving around, sometimes I watch TV and movies, I help Private bake when he feels like it, I nap, I gamble…”

Skipper seemed to be drawing a blank for whatever reason. Surely, he had things he did in his free time, right? It wasn’t like he was ALWAYS on the clock, he just never really thought of certain periods of time as…free. What even counted as free-time anyhow? Was it just time that wasn’t spent doing other things? Under that definition, no time was free.

“Can I say this to you as both a friend, an enemy, and somebody who’s known you for quite a few years at this point?”

Skipper nodded hesitantly.

“Jesus Christ, you need some hobbies.” Hans stated, matter of factly. “Working on your “combat capabilities,” as you put it, seems to be a literal constant considering your job as…however your job is defined, so it’s less play and more work than anything else. You mentioned helping Private bake “when he feels like it,” and I wouldn’t exactly call napping a hobby, or gambling a healthy one.”

Skipper shrugged. It’s not like “Stomp the Wombat” ever left the confines of the lair, anyhow.

“It just feels like you don’t have a lot of things you do just for yourself, you know? Driving around and watching TV are the only hobbies that feel wholly your own, something you don’t do for work or for others. Keep in mind that you can keep doing these things you enjoy, but perhaps you should find other things for yourself. Like an instrument, or a cooking class.”

“I told the boys that I joined a bowling league just to be here.”

“And did that seem believable enough for you to do to be here?”

His silence told Hans everything, but not the literal everything of Skipper “going to bed” at 8 just to climb through his window at 12:30, shimmy down the fire escape, and walk to Hans’s office.

But he probably could tell anyhow.

Of course, this kind of put a blight on Hans’s plans to make Skipper more comfortable while being here, and as he told him such, Skipper proceeded to lay down on the couch. Hans couldn’t tell the exact reason for the action, but it did seem to be a point of exasperation for him.

“Well, damn, sorry I “foiled your plot” to make myself comfortable in the den of the beast.”

“Skipper, you insult me. You really think I’d decorate my den with wooden sailboats? Absolutely criminal.”

“You seem to forget that.” He muttered. Hans ignored it.

“Although the hobby talk didn’t exactly lead where I thought it could…It did lead me elsewhere.”

“Goddamn it.”

“What skill have you always wanted to learn? What’s something that you’ve wanted to try for just, so long, and never got the chance to?”

Skipper began to pick at his lip. This whole talk already made him nervous, but now what was he supposed to say? That he figured he’d be in the back of a truck with is hand hanging out the taillight since he was 14, for whatever reason, so he didn’t even bother considering his top 3 colleges, let alone any future ambitions?

Still, if he was quiet for too long, either Hans would judge him, or he’d render his lips a bloody mess, and that’d be a whole different thing to deal with.

“…Archery sounds fun.” He said. Hans nodded.

“That’s interesting. It’s closely related to your pre-established interests but it’s closer to a sport now than something to be used in an actual combat situation, which sort of allows it to be separated from your work.”

Skipper nodded as well, allowing Hans to believe that that was his thought process from the start, and more of just curious to see if he could shoot a flame off a candle like Annie Oakley.

“You mentioned you liked baking with Private. Do you like the idea of baking itself, or just doing it with another person?”

“Food is meant to be shared?” Skipper seemed to be asking, but also stated in a very definitive way. “It’s a process. It’d be weird not to help in the process.”

Hans pulled his hand away from Skipper’s mouth, where a few small cuts were beginning to form. “If you’d like to have a session where we did a low-stress activity you wanted to do, and we talked while doing so, I think it’d put you in the best conductive environment possible to actually combat the problems that seem so visible to me. This was a good first development, though. I just don’t know if I can expect on accidental issues to identify and attack every time.”

Hans sighed and got up from his chair to stare out the window. Skipper didn’t know why he did this, outside of being a dramatic bitch, but it got him to look anyhow.

“It’s so incidental, many people struggle with balancing work and life as is, but this could easily be one of the main causes of your paranoia, as well as causing a level of detachment and depersonalization, which relates to how you relate to others.”

And well, damn. What was Skipper supposed to say to that?

“Our time’s almost up.” Hans said, checking his watch. Skipper was coming to realize how strange time in therapy was. It simultaneously felt like hours and seconds passing all at once. Perhaps it was because there were no clocks, like a casino. Or maybe it was because going to therapy at 1 in the morning didn’t exactly give you a sun to follow in terms of time. Hans handed Skipper a weird sort of rack with string on it, along with some tissues.

“It’s a loom. Fidget with something that won’t bleed for the next five minutes, if you would.”

Skipper glared at him for the snide comment, but Skipper didn’t exactly put it back where Hans had stored it originally. Picking at the strings inanely didn’t feel as satisfying as his usual fidgets, but it would work until he lost focus and the skin had time to heal.

“I’m giving you three assignments until our next session.” Skipper would’ve originally rolled his eyes at the idea of homework, but there was something that felt already strange about this session. Last session, he was so thoroughly antagonized and owned in such a way that his entire psychological history had been exposed, but this made last session feel like…a misstep. It was almost like Hans was trying to give the rug back to Skipper after it had already been so unceremoniously swept away from him.

He seemed as unsure about this as he was, he even confided about the state of his own mental health, something he probably wasn’t supposed to do. Which, honestly, made Skipper feel better about the whole thing. He didn’t like being guided, and as much as he detested having to do this whole thing with Hans in particular, the idea of having to figure out a stranger at the same time they were trying to figure out him sounded like a nightmare. More than this already was.

The whole session felt off, sure, but it wasn’t as off as it could’ve been, and he knows it could only be worse.

“I want you to begin researching archery, if you really want to pursue it as a hobby, you should try to learn what you can about it before jumping in and figuring out it isn’t what you thought it was.”

“I want you to pay a compliment to each of your team members in a casual way, this’ll strengthen your bonds with them, in a way that allows you to affirm that you appreciate them, as much as they appreciate you.”

Okay, that sounded like hippie nonsense, but who was he to judge at this point.

“And finally, I want you to pick out a recipe to prepare during our next session.”

“Wait, what?”

“A recipe. Something that’ll take less than an hour. I have a friend who’d give me access to their kitchen in the middle of the night, so we’ll be on neutral ground, and I’m sure it’ll be more believable to your “boys” that if you really are doing something in the middle of the night, that you have physical proof of it. Considering how weirdly secretive you are already, the idea you covered up secret cooking lessons with a bowling league doesn’t sound too far-fetched.” Hans was muttering at this point. All these things answered questions he figured he’d have, but nothing that helped with where he was NOW.

“I know it’s a weird idea, but the clients who have had the chance to do different, vaguely active things during our sessions tend to be more open and honest with me about things that they’re worried about, things that they struggle with, and they can make for more engaging sessions where you actually take in what I’m telling you, and makes it less of a lecture.” Hans sighed. “If you hate it, we never have to try anything like that again, but, I do really want you to give it a try. This is a two-way street, I can only give as much as I myself get. I just got lucky this week.”

Skipper stopped strumming the loom.

“Text me the address.” He said, and Hans would have burst with joy if such a thing was appropriate in present company, until he realized.

“I…don’t have your number?”

“Oh, no, session’s over! Wow, how did the time fly? Guess you’ll just have to figure that out for yourself, what a swell talk we had, doc,” Skipper yelled as he headed out the door.

“Pay at the front desk!” Hans yelled back before relaxing into his chair. Skipper was never going to be an easy client to deal with. Maybe he wouldn’t ALWAYS dance around the issues at hand, but he was never going to REALLY come clean about it. There may be things they never talk about, the same way Hans did.

And that was fine. Maybe it made what little he did learn all the more rewarding. Maybe it made what little he learned all the more meaningless if Skipper ever reached a point of complete and utter honesty with him, a fantasy he knew would never see come to light.

But who was to say, really?

It was all a matter of time.

After all, this was only the second session.

(Ahh! I can’t believe I didn’t post another fic for a whole! Month! I think it’s just because I didn’t really know what to do for the second session, and I think you can kinda tell, considering it’s not like Hans knows what to do either. Do you guys really want a whole fic series about Skipper going to therapy? I have no idea. It’s pretty fun, though. I don’t know how Hans became a therapist, either, but I guess that’s just what the dude does now. By the way, the client who turned her therapy sessions into stand-up comedy? That was just me in high school with my mandated therapist. I once gave a funeral to a squeaky toy I broke in the middle of the session. It was simultaneously so sad and so funny at the exact same time.

This fic will be up on my ao3, https://archiveofourown.org/users/tadstrangerthings, as soon as @drawbauchery posts it!)

[letsbeoutoftouch]

Back in December 2016, during a sleepover, my friends and I decided to watch EXO's Chanyeol's most recent movie, "So I Married an Anti-Fan". It effortlessly became one of my favourite movies, so much so that I rewatch it —at least— once a year.

Therefore, when it was first announced that South Korea was going to produce a drama based on the same story, I was thrilled. The feeling only increased when I found out that the male lead was Choi Tae-Joon, whom I loved because of Suspicious Partner. Later (to be more precise, this year), I discovered that the other lead was the one and only Sooyoung from SNSD!

The drama was filmed back in 2018, and it was supposed to air a loooot sooner, but it had a few problems and it finally came out this year. Since I don't like waiting for episodes to come out each week, I waited until it finished airing to watch it... And, today, I finished it!

So, here's my review, fresh out the oven!

· · ·

So I Married an Anti-Fan is a 2021 South Korean drama, featuring Choi Tae-Joon, Choi Sooyoung, Hwang Chansung and Han Ji-Ahn. It's based on the novel "그래서 나는 안티팬과 결혼했다" (So I Married an Anti-Fan), written by Kim Eun Jun and published in 2010.

· · ·

♡ PLOT:

The story revolves around Hoo Joon (Tae-Joon), a well-known idol, and Geun Young (Sooyoung), a magazine reporter. They meet during an event, where a series of misunderstandings leads them to have a bad impression of each other.

For this reason, when Geun Young loses her job, she's under the impression that it was Hoo Joon's doing and is therefore keen on "reveal" Joon's real character. However, her retaliation backfires, and she attracts a lot of attention as his "anti-fan".

Later, a TV producer approaches them both to star in a reality show. Geun Young and Hoo Joon accept and think to give each other a hard time on set. But, as time goes by, they get to know each other better and better.

· · ·

♡ EPISODES:

It's made up of 16 episodes, running for an hour each (i.e., your typical k-drama).

· · ·

♡ CHARACTERS:

-Geun Young (FL): She's the best character, hands down (I swear I'm not being biased because I love Sooyoung).

For some reason, I've seen a lot of bad comments about this character. I don't truly understand why some people said that she didn't stand up for herself or that she was so-so, when she dealt really well with everything that had happened to her. I'd like to see all those people in her shoes—I bet they'd have cracked up quickly.

Also, she's like the least toxic character I've ever come across in a drama. She waits patiently for Joon to deal with his problems and doesn't jump to conclusions regarding his relationship with In Hyeong and Jae Joon. She lets him do his thing, is an independent woman, and tries to be as little of a burden as she can to the people she cares about. So, props to her!

▫ ▫ ▫

-Hoo Joon (ML): Although I overall liked his character, I admit that if I hadn't previously watched the movie, I'd probably be wary of him at the beginning. But, don't worry: as the story progresses, you get to know him better. He's patient and thinks of other people's feelings and well-being a lot (sometimes, a little too much for his own good, but he's a good boy).

I felt the need to include that there was this one scene where he acts... In a way that I didn't find appealing. Fortunately, he isn't like that all throughout the drama. Also, he isn't toxic like a lot of the male leads in drama-land. If you're wondering which scene I'm referring to, here's a spoiler: *SPOILER ALERT* When he and Geun Young start dating, they are requested to film an advertisement together. In the filming, he acts all "jealous" because the dress she was wearing was too short for his liking. I'm sorry, but she's the only one who has a say on how short a dress she's wearing is—not you, not even if you're her partner *END OF SPOILER ALERT*.

▫ ▫ ▫

-JJ/Jae Joon (SML): Jae Joon is the second male lead, and he was portrayed by 2PM's Chansung.

I'm sorry, but I never could come to terms with this character, not even during the last episodes. If the writers' intention was for me to hate him, they (and Chansung's acting) totally achieved that purpose.

He is incredibly selfish and keeps this attitude up to episode 13/14. Towards the ending, the story tries that the audience feels some sympathy towards him—it is shown why he acted the way he did. Nevertheless, in my opinion, while his past may explain his actions, it doesn't justify any of them. That's why I couldn't bring myself to feel sympathetic or empathetic towards him. *SPOILER ALERT* In fact, I think Hoo Joon was too nice to be there for him in the last two or three episodes. *END OF SPOILER ALERT*

He's also outright abusive. *SPOILER ALERT* I mean, he slapped In Hyeong and broke her laptop ¿?... Even though I didn't like her that much, nothing justifies that kind of violent behaviour. *END OF SPOILER ALERT*

▫ ▫ ▫

-In Hyeong (SFL): She's the second female lead, portrayed by actress Han Ji-Ahn.

Oh, man. I had a hard time trying to wrap my head around this character. I was just going to say that I couldn't stand her because she was always purposely putting a spanner in the works, making everyone's life difficult.

However, as I was drafting this review, I began reflecting on the character and felt sympathy for her. She was in a vulnerable place—leaving aside that she felt abandoned by her first love, she had trouble trying to make her career take off, and she was in a really abusive relationship. It could be argued that JJ and In Hyeon were both toxic to each other, but it was clear that he was the one with the upper hand (he was the CEO of her new agency, which brings a real disbalance of power).

Moreover, it was hinted several times that all she went through took a toll on her mental health (*SPOILER ALERT* she was always taking pills to calm down, and she freaking tried to kill herself!!!!!!! *END OF SPOILER ALERT*). I believe she needed professional help to put herself back together, so she could let go of her past and finally leave that abusive relationship.

· · ·

♡ COUPLES:

Since this drama mostly gravitates towards romantic relationships, I'm including this section.

▫ ▫ ▫

-Geun Young x Hoo Joon: They are your typical enemies to lovers.

In the beginning, their relationship was tainted by a lot of misunderstandings, which led them to hate each other's guts (but, where's the charm in a k-drama that isn't filled with misunderstandings, am I right?). Once they started to spend more time together, they began understanding each other better. In time, they were able to leave their pride aside and got rid of their prejudices (yes, the story gives Jane Austen-ish vibes, so much so that "Pride and Prejudice" is mentioned a few times).

Their chemistry was alright. I would have changed some parts of the script that made a lot of scenes to be super cringey—especially, before some of their kisses (like, what a way to ruin such an awaited moment!).

The thing I liked the most about them was that neither of them was toxic, and they knew how and when to give the other person space. They were sweet, but not unbearable sweet—just the exact amount.

▫ ▫ ▫

-In Hyeong x Jae Joon: I don't know if they can be considered a true couple, but I'm adding them here just to repeat that I HATED THEM TOGETHER.

· · ·

♡ SOME PERSONAL INTERPRETATIONS AND THOUGHTS:

For me, the story tries to show the two sides of the same coin: things that may seem completely different, but are essentially the same. You can see it with Hoo Joon/Geun Young, their friends, and even with Hoo Joon/Jae Joon. Of course, this could be argued—it is just my personal impression.

Also, while the drama condemns some of the toxic fan behaviour, it sometimes romanticises it. *SPOILER ALERT* one fan freaking kidnapped him, and everything was suddenly alright ¿¿ Nuh-uh *END OF SPOILER ALERT*

· · ·

♡ DRAMA VS. MOVIE:

As I mentioned above, there's a prior Chinese movie from 2016 that was based on this novel. It features EXO's Chanyeol, Yuan Shan Shan, SNSD's Seohyun, and Jian Chao.

For obvious reasons, the story is shrunk down in the movie. There are a lot of things that weren't included in the movie, other things were overly simplified, and some stuff was missing and/or changed.

If you want to have a good laugh, then I recommend you to watch the movie. It's filled with non-sensical comedy that, in my opinion, China excels at. However, if you are more inclined towards drama, then the South Korean version is the one for you (you'll laugh, too, don't worry).

· · ·

♡ SUMMARY:

This is, basically, a sweet enemies-to-lovers, famous-person-and-normal-person story. If you like any of those troupes, then you're in for a treat.

It's a really lighthearted story that will make you laugh. Don't expect a complicated plot because there won't be one. It's ideal to have a break from all those dramas where you can't miss a single detail because you'll get lost, or from those dramas which plots are so heavy they end up tiring your mind out.

I loved the cast, and their acting was great (especially Chansung's, because he made me hate his character with a passion, lmao).

ALSO, if you like Sung Hoon (My Secret Romance, Oh My Venus) like me, then WATCH THIS DRAMA, lol. He has a guest role in some episodes!

· · ·

So I Married an Anti-Fan is available on VIKI!

· · ·

If you read the whole review, thank you very much! I hope you liked it.

[balenciagastones]

hi im kinda new to this can you pls explain to me why everybody hates lauryn? all i know is she wants kyle to be a dad and he isn't

here we go! putting this under the cut so i don’t flood people’s dash who don’t care <3

okay so bit of backstory first cos im gonna try and do this in chronological order, she is chloe goodman’s sister and she used to go out with marcus rashford’s brother, apart from that she was pretty much a nobody. i also dk how much you know about kyle but basically he’s been with annie for agessss and they have 3 sons together. at the start of 2020 it came out that lauryn was pregnant with a mystery england footballer’s baby and it was kept a secret who it was for ages and just said that they were in a whirlwind romance and the baby was a miracle because she has endometriosis and pos meaning she would struggle to conceive naturally. it was outed cos of pap photos that have been said were staged by her, pretty much the whole of this has been staged by her tbh but it was later announced that the baby daddy was kyle walker and all hell broke loose tbh.

all throughout her pregnancy and a bit after the baby was born she wouldn’t reveal the gender but constantly baited it and hyped it up and drew a lot of attention to the baby’s gender (a little bit of backstory to this is that annie obviously has 3 boys as we said before but she always always wanted a girl and has always been v public with that fact, she also had a miscarriage which wasn’t talked about until after the baby was born but hindsight makes this whole gender situation worse but back to the story). her sister was also pregnant at the same time as her and was public saying she was having a girl so lauryn used to post stories with girls’ baby clothes and pink things in basically to just bait she was having a girl when she knew all along it was a boy, there’s literally no reason for this apart from her wanting to spite annie and imply that she was having a girl baby with the man she loved to hurt her for no reason.

cut forward to when the baby is born and she starts to promote these bracelets which have different ones for different situations, so she has one for anxiety, one for sleep, one for fertility (you can see where this is going) and there’s a few points with these scam bracelets. first off she came out and said she was wearing one at the time she slept with kyle so this baby perhaps wasn’t so much an accident on her part as she was manifesting fertility and that she’d become pregnant basically, take from that what you will but it was clearly her intention to fall pregnant with his baby when she knew he was with another woman long term and had 3 little boys with her. and the second part to it is just what an absolute scam those bracelets are, they’re not cheap and they target vulnerable groups of people and profit off their struggles which is obviously so immoral and disgusting when a fuckin bead bracelet clearly can’t make you fertile or make you sleep better or any of this shit, it’s taking advantage of people in desperate need and taking money from vulnerable people, it’s awful.

so now the baby is born and she’s said it’s a boy but hasn’t announced the name and allegedly didn’t pick the name until he was 4 months old or something, but she decides that they need a name to call him so decide to say his name is junior. now you can immediately see the issue with this, she’s been banging on for the whole of her pregnancy that she’s a single mother and he’s not involved blah blah blah then calls him junior, which ofc people asked if the name was kyle junior and she as much as said it was and started referring to him as junior until she posted a video of the baby holding a necklace that said KW. obviously calling your baby junior implies that they have the dad’s name and are the jr version of the dad so when she posted the KW necklace alongside a caption that said ‘for those asking why it doesn’t say JW, KW are his true initials’ ofc everybody assumed his name was kyle walker junior, and she let this go on for 6 MONTHS. she wore this necklace that says KW everywhere it’s lit in all of her instagram photos, it literally came across as a trophy just shouting that she got knocked up by kyle walker and just using it as a constant reminder to anyone and everyone that her baby was half famous footballer kyle walkers regardless of whether he was involved or not, baring in mind in the same breath she’s continuing to go on about how she’s a single mother and doing it all on her own. her saying she’s doing it all on her own is a load of shit too because her family helps her constantly and she always has someone looking after him with her and she lives in a big fancy house so she’s putting across she’s struggling and a single mother out on her own but that’s not the truth.

she also kept giving questionable parenting advice out on her story and endorsing products and methods that weren’t the most effective and weren’t recommended, even a blanket method that im sure was said to be harmful and she’s promoted many products that she shouldn’t have just in the name of money and fame and clout, she isn’t qualified to be giving out parenting advice to the scale she is and i understand she’s gotten experience but she talks like she’s a professional and holds q&as giving advice she’s not qualified to give and considering she promotes half dodgy products, it’s not the best situation. two more random things before we’re caught up to what’s happened today, she put the baby in a city jersey then the next week put him in a liverpool jersey just to spite kyle LMAO and they all went on holiday to dubai and im pretty sure paparazzi isnt allowed in dubai that’s why all the celebs go there but she was papped there so she must’ve set that up too lmaoooooo. but now we’re at today.

basically it started by kyle posting a picture of his own personal football boots that he played in for the final match of the season im sure, and he had printed on the names and dates of birth of all 3 kids he had with annie, and as you can quite imagine, lauryn wasn’t very happy with this. so she went straight on her stories preaching how horrific it was that he didn’t include kairo’s name on his boots and he’s done nothing but he cute and innocent and kyle was ‘bullying’ his own son which is obvs the wrong word to use but she’s daft and has been throwing around the word bullying, and talking about how she won’t let their son be left out, baring in mind she constantly says how she’s a single mother and prides herself on that she doesn’t have him involved and that he’s a horrible person etc etc. so all of her little minions who love her started replying to her story saying he was disgusting blah blah blah and decided as a collective with her encouragement to spam his page with kairo’s name and demand justice for kairo or something so after he got a few comments he turned the comments off from the post about the boots so they went to his first post before the boots which was a memorial post for the victims of the manchester arena attack. fully grown women commenting on a memorial post for such a tragic event demanding to know where kairos name was or spamming his name letter by letter, first off it’s just batshit crazy but second off how disrespectful?? from lauryn as well to encourage it and think of nobody but herself and want the attention because realistically it wasn’t gonna achieve anything but slightly irk him that he had to turn the comments off.

she’s also been encouraging people to email puma themselves and demand to know why they did it as if they had any input on what kyle had on his personal boots, puma probably had no idea about any of this and certainly didn’t do it on purpose to cause a storm so there’s no reason for them to be complaining to puma. she posted a list of what she wanted to happen including kyles post to be removed, the boots to be pulled (i don’t think she realises they were just personal boots for kyle and not a product for the general public to buy), a public apology to kairo and a public statement to be put out, none of which would solve the greater situation or help the situation that’s already been caused.

she posted saying kyle was bullying the baby and mentally abusing him which is disgusting to be throwing around when that’s not the case at all cos in reality kyles just trying to mend his relationships with annie and his family while keeping lauryn and the baby out of it like she keeps going on about, but then when it comes down to it she uses his surname, posts about it 24/7, wants his name on his boots, uses him for clout, walks around with a KW necklace on etc etc etc. most recently she’s created a petition to get pumas attention to do all of what i listed before and i think about 600 people have signed it so far.

i think that’s all although im sure anons will chip in if ive missed anything, that’s if anybody’s actually read this far 😭 so yes, more than you bargained for probably anon! story time with han! xx