#park jimin x reader angst
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keehomania · 3 months ago
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savior (구세주) — park jimin (박 치민)
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✧.* 18+
in the depths of forgotten realms, where the line between myth and reality blurred into a tapestry of whispered legends, you wandered through the veil of the supernatural. the air around you shimmered with an ethereal light, pulsating with a rhythm that seemed to beat in sync with your own heart. you felt it—an invisible thread connecting you to forces beyond mortal comprehension.
ancient trees, their gnarled branches twisted into elaborate patterns, whispered secrets of the ages. the leaves, imbued with an otherworldly glow, rustled softly, their sound a melodious symphony of enchantment. as you moved through this enchanted forest, you could almost see the faint outlines of fae folk flitting among the shadows, their delicate wings catching the moonlight like threads of silver.
water nymphs glided over the surface of tranquil lakes, their laughter like the tinkling of crystal chimes. fire spirits flickered within the hearths of ancient stone cottages, their flames casting a golden hue that warded off the encroaching darkness. in this realm, every creature possessed a touch of the extraordinary. the wolves that prowled through the underbrush had eyes that gleamed with intelligence far beyond the mundane, their coats shimmering with a spectral light. the owls that hooted from the treetops were the keepers of ancient wisdom, their gaze penetrating the veil of time itself.
you sensed the pull of ancient magic in the wind, a reminder of the great forces that shaped the world. enigmatic sorcerers and enigmatic beings, cloaked in robes woven from stardust, drifted through the shadows, their presence as profound as it was enigmatic. their eyes held the secrets of the universe, and their gestures wove spells of incredible power, shaping reality with a mere flick of their fingers. in this space between worlds, you felt an intoxicating sense of belonging and awe. the supernatural was not a distant concept but a tangible reality, intricately intertwined with the fabric of your existence. you had become a part of this timeless dance, where every element held the promise of wonder and every shadow whispered of ancient powers waiting to be discovered.
in the midst of the extraordinary realm, where every breath seemed to carry a whisper of magic, you stood as an anomaly��a solitary figure in a world brimming with the supernatural. the ties that bound you to this place were both intricate and fragile, like threads of silver spun in a tapestry that only partially embraced you.
you were acutely aware of your lineage, a lineage steeped in power and mystery. your parents, figures of reverence and awe, possessed abilities that transcended the ordinary. your mother could call upon the wind to shape it into messages of hope or warning, her voice an incantation that stirred the very air. your father wielded fire with a mastery that painted the night sky with flickers of crimson and gold, a spectacle of elemental artistry that held the gaze of all who witnessed it.
your brother, too, was a being of remarkable gifts. his capacity to shapeshift was the stuff of legends—one moment a swift and agile wolf, the next a majestic eagle soaring high above the treetops. he moved effortlessly between the forms, each transformation seamless and imbued with an elegance that spoke of deep-rooted connection to the magical forces that surrounded you.
yet, in stark contrast to the vibrant tapestry of powers that wove through your family, you stood untouched by the same magic that defined their existence. you were a paradox in this world of wonder—an individual deeply connected yet profoundly separate from the mystical realm. the very elements that danced and mingled around you, so effortlessly embraced by those you loved and admired, remained just out of your grasp.
your attempts to commune with the elements were met with a disheartening silence. you reached out to the wind, hoping to coax it into carrying your wishes or messages, but it responded with a benign indifference. the fire that roared in the hearths, so eager to share its warmth and secrets with others, seemed to dance with a will of its own when you approached, leaving you merely a spectator in its fiery embrace.
the animals, with their eyes aglow with ancient wisdom, regarded you with a curiosity that quickly faded into disinterest. they would not heed your calls or acknowledge your presence in the way they did with those who shared their magical affinity. it was as if an invisible barrier kept you on the fringes of their world, a reminder of the chasm that separated you from their effortless communion with nature.
in social circles where enchantment was the norm, you felt like a shadow among vibrant colors. conversations often revolved around feats of magic—stories of teleportation, shapeshifting, and elemental manipulation. you listened with a mixture of longing and resignation, acutely aware of your exclusion from these extraordinary experiences. it was as though you were a spectator in a grand performance, unable to participate in the very essence of the spectacle.
you had learned to navigate the space with a grace borne of necessity. you played your role with quiet dignity, offering support and companionship to those whose powers you admired from a distance. your place in this realm was a testament to the intricate balance between presence and absence, between connection and separation. in a world where magic defined existence, you were a poignant reminder that even among the most enchanted, there could be those who, despite their ties, remained untouched by the very forces that shaped their reality.
in the quiet of your room, illuminated by the soft, flickering light of a single candle, you faced your brother with a heart heavy with questions. his figure, a tapestry of shifting forms and shimmering energies, stood before you, embodying the very essence of what you yearned for. the silence between you was filled with the weight of your unspoken doubts.
“why don’t i have any powers?” you asked, your voice trembling with a mix of frustration and desperation. the words felt like an intrusion into the serene harmony of your brother’s existence. you watched as daehyun sighed, his gaze softening with a compassion that only deepened your sense of inadequacy.
“it’s not something you can control,” he said gently, placing a reassuring hand on your shoulder. “powers manifest in their own time. maybe yours just haven’t surfaced yet.” you nodded, but the words did little to alleviate the gnawing sense of unease that had settled in your chest. the promise of future potential did little to comfort you in the present. as the conversation waned, you sought solace from your mother, her presence a beacon of warmth and understanding amidst the cold uncertainty.
she embraced you with a tenderness that spoke of unconditional love. “i want you to know,” she murmured softly, her voice imbued with a quiet strength, “that not having powers doesn’t change how much i love you. you are just as precious to me as anyone with magic in their veins.” her words, though well-intentioned, only deepened the chasm of your sorrow. you tried to draw comfort from her assurances, but they felt hollow, like a beautiful painting covering a void. you couldn’t shake the feeling that her love, though unwavering, was a pale consolation in a world where power defined worth.
when your father came to you, his usual fiery demeanor was softened by an uncharacteristic melancholy. “i wish,” he said, his voice laden with a rare vulnerability, “that i could understand what it’s like for you. i sometimes wish i could be like you—free from the burdens of power.” his sentiment was meant to be reassuring, a gesture of empathy from one who knew the weight of extraordinary abilities. yet, his words only seemed to underscore the isolation you felt. his struggle to relate to your condition, while empathetic, highlighted your distance from the very world he inhabited.
as the day turned to night, you found yourself alone once more, your frustration boiling over into a silent plea. you gazed at the star-studded sky, your eyes searching for any sign of a higher power that might offer you some measure of solace or change. you groaned inwardly, your heart heavy with a silent prayer, begging for anything—an inkling of magic, a spark of potential, anything that might bridge the gap between you and the world you so desperately wished to be a part of.
unbeknownst to you, your mother, too, was engaged in her own private prayer, her heart aching for you in a way that transcended words. her plea was not driven by disappointment but by a deep-seated concern for your well-being. she feared the dangers and betrayals that could come from those who wielded power—the same dangers that had once threatened her own family. she prayed fervently, hoping that some semblance of power or protection might come to you, not out of a sense of inadequacy, but from a desire to shield you from the harsh realities of a world where power could be both a gift and a curse.
the hallways of the school were a continuous cascade of shimmering lights and crackling energy, each corner alive with the potent hum of supernatural power. it was a place where every student and teacher was marked by their own unique abilities, a realm where magic was as common as air. the walls, lined with ornate murals depicting epic battles and mythical creatures, seemed to pulsate with the essence of enchantment. amidst this tapestry of abilities, you were an anomaly—a solitary figure navigating a world of extraordinary talents with no powers of your own. the disparity was stark, highlighted by the whispers and sidelong glances that followed you through the corridors. everyone knew your status as the exception, a reality that was as inescapable as it was uncomfortable.
despite this, the teachers maintained their professionalism, treating you with the same respect they afforded every student. you were here because of your family’s legacy, a fact that some found difficult to overlook. you often felt like a mere shadow among the bright lights of your peers, your presence a reminder of the boundaries between the ordinary and the extraordinary.
haesoo was your singular solace in this enchanted world. she, too, had powers, though her ability to see into the future provided little in the way of physical prowess. this limitation made her just as vulnerable to the harsh judgments and insults as you were. yet, despite the ridicule, she remained steadfast in her friendship, a source of empathy amidst the sea of scorn.
you leaned against your locker, the cool metal offering a small measure of relief. haesoo approached, her eyes filled with a gentle concern. ahe took your hand in hers, her touch warm and reassuring. as she closed her eyes, you could sense the familiar yet elusive sensation of her power at work. you watched her face for any sign of revelation, your skepticism palpable. then, with a sudden gasp, haesoo’s eyes snapped open, her grip tightening on your hand. “what’s wrong?” you asked, a note of apprehension in your voice. “what do you see?”
“there’s a savior in the near future,” she said, her voice a mixture of awe and uncertainty. “expect the unexpected.”
you couldn’t help but scoff, rolling your eyes in mild exasperation. “the unexpected? like you ripping my hand off?”
haesoo’s eyes widened in realization as she noticed the firmness of her grip. she quickly loosened her hold, offering you a nervous laugh. “sorry about that. i didn’t mean to—” you chuckled, though your smile was tinged with weariness. “it’s fine. i just wonder if i’ll ever get any power at all.”
from behind you, a voice cut through the conversation with a sneering edge. “you could only dream of it.”
you turned to see taehyung, a smirk playing on his lips. his disdain was well-known; ever since he had learned of your lack of abilities, he had made it his mission to taunt and belittle you. you offered him a thin smile, trying to mask the sting of his words. “thanks for the encouragement.”
taehyung’s smirk widened. “wanna see something cool?” you shook your head, not in the mood for more of his antics. “not really.”
ignoring your response, taehyung used his telekinetic powers to lift you off the ground. you yelped in surprise as he began to sway you through the air, your feet dangling a few inches above the floor. haesoo’s face flushed with concern, and she called out, “taehyung, put her down!”
his eyes sparkled with mischief as he replied, “or what? you’ll read my future with a fortune cookie?”
the bell rang, and he reluctantly set you down, patting your head with a dismissive chuckle. “it never gets old,” he said, walking past you. you watched him go, a mix of frustration and resignation settling over you. the insults and jabs had become a constant, an unwelcome backdrop to your days at the school. despite your hopes for a reprieve, it seemed the mockery would persist as long as you remained a strong contrast to the powers that defined your peers.
the classroom buzzed with an energy that felt almost tangible, a living, breathing entity shaped by the collective powers of its occupants. each student seemed to manipulate the environment in their own unique way, creating a whirlwind of distractions that made focusing on anything else nearly impossible.
to your left, a girl with flowing dark hair effortlessly levitated her pen, guiding it through the air as if it were an extension of her will. she reached out with her mind, making the pen dance gracefully across her notebook. nearby, another student with a calm demeanor simply tapped her temple, and answers to the professor’s questions appeared on her paper as if by magic. her telepathic ability allowed her to glean the answers directly from the professor’s thoughts, a skill that left you feeling distinctly out of place.
you sighed inwardly, feeling the weight of your own inadequacies. you knew that while others could summon and control elements with ease, or glean knowledge without effort, you had to work diligently to achieve even the most basic understanding. the constant comparison to your peers’ effortless mastery of their abilities was a persistent reminder of your own limitations.
the professor, a stern man whose presence demanded respect, looked around the room with a discerning gaze. his eyes settled on you, an unspoken challenge evident in his expression. “what do you believe causes dreams?” he asked, his voice cutting through the cacophony of telekinetic murmurs and mental projections.
you furrowed your brow, trying to concentrate amidst the chaos. the hands of those with telepathic abilities shot up eagerly, but the professor's focus remained solely on you. taking a deep breath, you began, “i believe dreams are a result of the subconscious mind processing thoughts and experiences. they are influenced by brain activity, which creates a narrative from our emotions and memories.”
the professor’s eyes softened, and he nodded in approval. “a thoughtful answer,” he said. “correct.”
you felt a fleeting sense of accomplishment, but it was quickly overshadowed by the sneer you noticed from the girl who had been so eager to demonstrate her telepathic prowess. her expression was one of disdain, a silent judgment that seemed to cut deeper than any spoken insult.
as the day drew to a close, you found yourself in the bathroom, seeking a moment of solitude away from the relentless buzz of the school. you stepped out of the stall, your thoughts still lingering on the subtle sneer you had seen earlier. the bathroom, typically a place of mundane quiet, felt charged with an unsettling tension.
as you turned to leave, a girl blocked your path. her face was one you recognized from class—one of the telekinetics who had been demonstrating her powers with such ease. you looked up at her, a sense of dread mingling with resignation. “what do you want?” you asked, your voice betraying your unease.
ahe smirked, her eyes gleaming with a cruel delight. “i had an itching to use the toilet,” she said, her tone dripping with malice. without waiting for a response, she pushed past you and into the stall.
you stepped aside, gesturing for her to proceed. but before you could react, everything happened in a blur. she spun around with surprising speed, grabbing a handful of your hair and yanking you towards her. your heart raced as you tried to break free, but her grip was unyielding. you flailed helplessly as she maneuvered you towards the toilet. the cold, harsh reality of the situation hit you as she dunked your head into the bowl. the frigid water engulfed you, sending a shock through your system. panic surged through you as you tried to gasp for air, but the water swirled around you, making it difficult to breathe. the world spun in a chaotic whirlpool of muffled sounds and blinding wetness.
she pulled you up only to slam your head back into the toilet, holding it down longer this time. the sensation of being submerged was disorienting, and your head spun in a disorienting dance of pressure and damp. the mixture of the cold water and the overwhelming sense of helplessness left you disoriented and gasping for breath when she finally yanked you up again. “maybe if you had any powers,” she said with a sneer, “you could get out of this one.” her voice was mocking, her tone a harsh reminder of the gap between your abilities and those of your peers. she left you there, dirty, wet, and sobbing, the pain and humiliation of the encounter settling heavily on your shoulders.
as the door swung shut behind her, leaving you alone in the bathroom, the reality of your situation washed over you in waves. you were left with the lingering sting of her taunts, the sting of being powerless in a world where such power was the norm. the echo of your sobs and the coolness of the bathroom tiles were the only witnesses to your silent plea for solace in a place that felt both foreign and unforgiving.
the journey home was a blur of muted colors and heavy steps, each stride a reminder of the day’s harrowing events. as you walked, the chill of the wet clothes clung to your skin, and the weight of your soaked attire seemed to anchor you to the pain and humiliation you had just endured. the evening air, cool and unyielding, did little to soothe the ache in your heart or the cold dampness against your body.
you finally reached the front door, the familiar warmth of home contrasting starkly with the cold dread that clung to you. as you stepped inside, the sound of your wet shoes squelching on the hardwood floor was the only indication of your disheveled state. your mother was in the kitchen, her back turned as she prepared dinner. the comforting aroma of her cooking wafted through the air, but it did little to lift the gloom hanging over you.
she turned as you entered, her eyes widening in shock as she took in your appearance. “what happened?” she asked, her voice filled with concern. her gaze traveled over your dripping clothes and disheveled hair, her maternal instincts flaring into action. you met her eyes for a moment, the weight of your ordeal pressing heavily on your shoulders. the words you wanted to say seemed to catch in your throat, and instead of responding, you simply retreated to your room, your silence a painful testament to the day’s emotional toll.
the door to your room closed behind you with a soft click, and you sank onto your bed, your sodden clothes leaving damp impressions on the sheets. you stared blankly at the ceiling, the oppressive silence of your room amplifying the turmoil within. as you sat there, you could hear the muffled sounds of your mother’s distress from the other side of the house.
in the kitchen, your mother’s cries were heartfelt and raw. she confided in your father, her voice trembling with anguish as she spoke of her wish for you to be able to defend yourself. “why can’t they leave her alone?” she wept. “i just wish she could stand up for herself. it breaks my heart to see her suffer like this.” your father’s response was calm and comforting, his steady voice a balm to your mother’s fears. “it’s not her fault,” he reassured her. “she’s doing her best in a world that doesn’t make it easy. we’ll find a way to help her, i promise.”
you could hear his words faintly through the walls, a bittersweet reminder of the support that was available to you. but in your isolation, it felt distant, almost unreachable. when you finally gathered the strength to rise, you made your way to the bathroom. the cool, tiled surface felt refreshing against your heated skin as you undressed and stepped into the shower. you turned the faucet, allowing the warm water to cascade over you, mingling with the remnants of the day’s grime and tears.
as the water poured over you, you let out a shuddering breath, the steam and warmth offering a fleeting sense of solace. You sank to the floor of the shower, the water continuing to flow over you, masking the tears that streaked down your face. each droplet that hit your skin seemed to carry away a small fragment of the pain, but it did little to quell the deep sorrow that enveloped you. you wept silently, the sound of the water mingling with your sobs. the weight of the day’s events pressed heavily upon you, and you found yourself praying for a way out of the cycle of torment and helplessness. your whispered pleas for change, for the chance to be more than a spectator in a world of power, were drowned by the relentless rush of the shower.
that night, as you lay in bed, the exhaustion of the day’s emotional and physical toll was awful. the darkness of your room enveloped you like a shroud, offering no comfort against the cold fear that gripped you. you pulled the damp sheets around you, seeking solace in their weight. your thoughts continued to swirl as you drifted into a restless sleep, your mind haunted by images of the day’s events and the painful realization of your own vulnerability. the hope for change was a faint, flickering light in the depths of your dreams, a fragile ember that you clung to as you cried yourself to sleep, wishing for a future where you could finally find a place where you belonged.
the morning sun filtered through the school’s grand windows, casting elongated shadows across the hallways as you trudged through the familiar corridors, still feeling the weight of yesterday’s events. the usual hum of conversations and bursts of laughter filled the air, but today, the vibrant atmosphere did little to uplift your somber mood.
you glanced around, searching for any sign of hana, the girl who had humiliated you the day before. her absence was conspicuous, her usual spot in the classroom glaringly empty. you took a seat beside haesoo, the comforting familiarity of her presence offering a small measure of solace amidst the school environment.
haesoo looked up from her notebook as you settled in. her eyes, bright with curiosity, took in your demeanor. “have you noticed? hana isn’t here today,” you said, trying to mask the unease in your voice.
haesoo’s expression shifted to one of mild amusement. she shrugged nonchalantly, though her eyes betrayed a flicker of concern. “maybe the cops got to the bitch,” she said, her tone light but edged with discomfort. after a brief pause, she shuddered slightly and added, “i’ve got a bad feeling about this. something doesn’t sit right with me.” you stared at hana’s vacant seat, your thoughts racing. the possibility that something sinister had happened crossed your mind, but you quickly dismissed it. she could simply be ill, or perhaps she was skipping school. the pragmatic side of you struggled to push aside the gnawing sense of unease.
as the lesson began, you tried to focus on the professor’s lecture, but the absence of hana and the eerie implications of haesoo’s comment lingered at the edge of your thoughts. across the room, hana’s friend, mina, sat with a palpable air of hostility. her glare, sharp and unrelenting, made it clear she bore a grudge. you averted your gaze, feeling a familiar pang of discomfort. when the bell rang, signaling the end of the class, you stood up, gathering your things with a mixture of relief and trepidation. as you walked down the hallway, the bustling student body seemed to press in on you, the noise and movement creating a dizzying effect.
suddenly, you stumbled, your foot catching on something unseen. you brushed it off as a momentary lapse in coordination, but the next step was less forgiving. your legs gave way entirely, sending you crashing onto your back with a jarring impact. you winced as pain shot through your body, the hard floor feeling like a relentless punishment.
turning your head, you saw mina standing nearby, her lips curled into a smirk of malicious satisfaction. “why did you stop walking? do you wanna die?” she taunted, her voice dripping with derision. ignoring her taunts, you struggled to your feet, the effort exacerbating the ache that had begun to settle into your bones. you started to walk again, determined to reach your next class despite the throbbing pain in your head and the sting of her cruel words.
but as you continued down the corridor, an unexpected force slammed into you from behind, propelling you against the wall with a jarring thud. the impact was so forceful that you felt the wall tremble, a low crack resonating through the hallway. pain exploded in your back, sending waves of disorientation through you.
amidst the haze of agony, you heard mina’s laughter, a cruel, incoherent sound that mingled with the throbbing in your head. she sauntered over to you, her presence looming as she leaned close, her voice a chilling whisper. “that must hurt,” she said with a mocking tone, her eyes gleaming with a cold satisfaction. she didn’t wait for your response before turning on her heel and walking away.
the corridor seemed to spin around you as you pushed yourself upright, your head pounding with a relentless intensity. each step you took was a struggle, the pain radiating through your body with every movement. you made your way home, the journey feeling endless as the throbbing in your temples grew more insistent.
once you reached the safety of your room, you collapsed onto your bed, the pain and exhaustion overwhelming you. as darkness settled over the room, you tried to force yourself into a restless sleep, hoping that the respite of slumber would dull the ache and offer some escape from the torment of the day.
the pain persisted, but with each passing moment, sleep began to claim you, a dim, fleeting hope that tomorrow might bring a reprieve from the relentless cycle of suffering. as the world around you faded into the comforting embrace of sleep, you clung to the fragile hope that the dawn might bring change and relief from the unrelenting shadows of your daily struggles.
the next morning, you approached the school with a knot of unease settling in your stomach. the events of the previous day had left you feeling on edge, and the emptiness of the hallways seemed to mirror the unsettling silence that enveloped you. as you walked to your classroom, you found yourself scanning the crowd for any sign of mina or hana, but there was nothing—only the usual bustle of students chatting and shuffling to their next class.
you entered the classroom and took your seat beside haesoo, whose presence offered a small measure of comfort. the usual buzz of activity was noticeably absent, and as the minutes ticked by, the growing absence of hana and mina began to weigh heavily on you. you leaned in close to haesoo, trying to keep your voice low. “this can’t be a coincidence,” you said, your tone tinged with anxiety.
she squinted at you, her brow furrowed in thought. “it isn’t,” she replied, her voice carrying an edge of uncertainty. she hesitated, her eyes darting around as if seeking something just beyond her grasp. “but i can’t get a clear message,” she added slowly. “it’s almost like it’s out of reach.”
before you could ask her to elaborate on what she meant, the classroom door swung open with an authoritative creak. two officers stepped into the room, their presence instantly commanding silence. the room fell into an uneasy hush, the only sounds the shuffling of papers and the occasional murmur of curiosity.
the lead officer, a tall man with a stern expression, cleared his throat before speaking. “good morning, students. we are conducting a search regarding two of your classmates, oh mina and jung hana.” his words carried a gravity that made your heart skip a beat. the room buzzed with whispers as the announcement settled over the students.
the officer continued, his voice steady but tinged with concern. “both girls have been reported missing by their families. they have not come home, nor have they been seen anywhere in the vicinity. we urge anyone who may have information about their whereabouts to come forward immediately.”
the murmurs grew louder, a mix of shock and curiosity spreading through the classroom. your eyes widened in disbelief as the reality of the situation sank in. the officers concluded their announcement and exited the room, leaving a tense atmosphere in their wake. you turned to haesoo, who was looking at you with a mixture of concern and suspicion. “do you have anything to do with this?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
you rolled your eyes, a mixture of frustration and indignation bubbling within you. “are you serious?” you replied. “you know i wouldn’t—”
she shook her head, cutting you off. “no, it’s not that,” she said quickly. “it’s just, i got a chill when they mentioned it. i’ve never felt anything like it before. it’s unsettling.” her words only deepened the sense of unease that had settled over you. as you left the classroom and made your way home, the weight of the day’s events pressed heavily upon you. the mystery of mina and hana’s disappearance loomed large, and you couldn’t shake the nagging sense that something was profoundly wrong.
when you finally arrived home, the house was quiet, the usual warmth of your family’s presence replaced by an anxious tension. your brother, who was usually the epitome of calm, met you at the door with a grave expression. “did you hear the news?” he asked, his voice laced with concern. you nodded, feeling the day’s events catch in your throat. “yes, the police came to school. they were looking for mina and hana.”
your parents, who had been sitting at the kitchen table, exchanged startled glances. your mother’s face turned pale, her eyes reflecting a mixture of shock and a cold, hard resolve. “think of it as a blessing,” she said, her voice lacking warmth. “those girls were nothing but trouble.”
the coldness in her voice cut through you, leaving you feeling more isolated than ever. the idea of them being missing was unsettling, but your mother’s reaction felt almost dispassionate, as though their disappearance was a matter of indifference rather than concern. you could sense the undercurrent of relief in her words, a stark contrast to the unease that plagued you.
you lay in bed, staring at the ceiling as your thoughts raced. the disappearance of the two girls who seemed determined to make your life a living hell, combined with the cold detachment of your family, created a turbulent whirlpool of confusion and unease. the hope for answers seemed as distant as ever, and as sleep finally claimed you, it came with a heavy heart, filled with unanswered questions and a lingering sense of dread. the night enveloped you in its quiet, oppressive embrace. you stirred from a fitful sleep, tossing and turning as the day’s events replayed in your mind. with a groan, you swung your legs over the edge of the bed and padded softly to the kitchen. the cool, dimly lit room offered a brief respite from the swirling thoughts that plagued you.
you poured yourself a glass of water, the clear liquid offering a momentary sense of calm. as you took a sip, the coldness of the water seemed to contrast sharply with the heaviness in your chest. you returned to your room, hoping that the soothing effect of the water might coax you back to sleep. instead, you lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, the darkness of the room filled with your racing thoughts. “will i ever get powers?” you mused aloud, the question echoing in the quiet of the night. “why can’t i just be like everyone else?”
a voice, soft but clear, sliced through your self-reflection, startling you. “are you still thinking about that?”
you whipped your head around to see a man standing in the corner of your room. his presence was unsettling, a contrast to the soft illumination of the moonlight that filtered through your window. his face was partially obscured by shadows, but his eyes gleamed with an unsettling amusement. you gasped and scrambled backward, your heart racing as you screamed. the sound was strangled, caught in your throat as your mind struggled to make sense of the intruder’s presence. he remained motionless, his expression unreadable as he watched you with a hint of a smile.
moments later, your brother burst into the room, his face etched with concern. “what’s wrong?” daehyun asked, his eyes scanning the room. his gaze passed over the man without a hint of recognition, as if the figure were nothing more than a figment of your imagination.
you quickly composed yourself, forcing a shaky smile. “i thought i saw a bug,” you stammered, trying to sound casual despite the pounding of your heart. “it must have been nothing.” daehyun gave you a skeptical look but shrugged it off. “alright, if you’re sure. call me if you need anything.”
as he left the room, you turned back to the man, who remained where he was, his presence an eerie constant. “who are you?” you asked, your voice trembling with a mix of fear and curiosity.
he regarded you with an amused glint in his eye. “i’m your savior,” he replied smoothly.
you blinked, confusion clouding your features. “what do you mean? are you going to hurt me?”
he scoffed lightly, a sound that seemed to carry its own form of amusement. “hurt you? no, i’m not here to hurt you. do you recall the people who were bullying you?” you nodded, the memory of their taunts and cruelty still fresh in your mind.
the man’s smile widened slightly. “i got rid of them,” he said, his tone casual as if discussing the weather.
panic surged through you, and you stumbled over your words. “you didn’t kill them, did you?”
“no, nothing so crude,” he said, a hint of disdain in his voice. “i sent them to the underworld.” the terms normal people were exposed to were biblical, accurate, generic. heaven and hell. in your world, the underworls existed openly. it was an alternate dimension, one that wasn't as bad as hell, yet seemingly just as bad. those who were sent were sent alive, bodies and souls intact, where they'd be repeatedly punished—over and over and over—for their wrongdoings.
your heart pounded as you tried to process his words. “why? why would you do that?”
he shrugged, a nonchalant gesture that seemed to make his words even more chilling. “because they were bothering you.”
you gaped at him, unable to comprehend the connection. “and what does that have to do with you?”
he raised an eyebrow, as if considering how to explain something very simple. “you should be familiar with having supernatural powers, shouldn’t you?”
“i’ve spent my entire life without any powers,” you retorted, frustration mingling with fear. “what does that have to do with you helping me now?”
“this is your power,” he said, his voice taking on a serious tone. “i’m from the underworld, and i can attach myself to whatever i choose, giving them any power they need.”
your eyes widened with disbelief. “why me? why did you choose me of all people?”
he paused for a moment, a contemplative look crossing his features. “i did it because i wanted to. and,” he added, his voice taking on a mysterious quality, “nobody else can see me unless i want them to.”
you stared at him, the weight of his words pressing heavily on your shoulders. the reality of the situation seemed almost too surreal to grasp. he chuckled softly, the sound a darkly pleasant note in the stillness of the night.
“you look like you’ve seen a ghost,” he said with a grin. “my name is park jimin. and (y/n) (l/n), i’ll be seeing you around.”
before you could react, he vanished from sight, leaving behind a lingering sense of his presence. you knew he was still there, an intangible shadow in the room, but his form was now invisible to you. the chill of his departure settled over you, and the eerie silence of the room seemed to close in.
your mind raced as you lay back in bed, trying to make sense of the strange encounter. the idea of possessing a power, of having someone from the underworld attach themselves to you, was both terrifying and fascinating. you felt a strange sense of anticipation, mixed with fear, as you stared into the darkness, the night pressing in with an oppressive weight. sleep came fitfully, but the presence of jimin lingered in your thoughts, an unsettling reminder of what you could only assume was to come.
the morning light peered through your curtains, casting a pale glow over your room. as you slowly awoke, the memories of the previous night were still fresh in your mind, but jimin’s unsettling presence was gone. you scanned the room, half-expecting to find him lurking in the shadows, but there was no sign of him. a wave of slight relief washed over you, though it was accompanied by an uneasy thought—he could be anywhere, hidden from view, and you wouldn't even know it.
you dragged yourself out of bed, feeling the weight of exhaustion still clinging to you. your mother’s voice called from downstairs, breaking the silence of the early morning. “how did you sleep?” she asked with a note of concern in her tone. forcing a smile, you replied, “just fine.”
daehyun scoffed as he entered the kitchen. “you screamed like you were being gutted last night,” he said, his voice carrying a mix of annoyance and curiosity. your father looked up from his newspaper, his brows knitting together. “what happened?” he asked, his tone indicating genuine concern.
you hesitated, then shrugged as casually as you could. “i saw a bug. it was nothing.” your father’s eyes lingered on you for a moment, but he seemed to accept your explanation. “alright then,” he said, turning back to his newspaper. the conversation moved on, but the undercurrent of unease persisted, as if the previous night’s events had left a lasting imprint.
you walked to school with a heavy heart, the weight of the unknown pressing down on you. as you approached the school gates, you noticed the usual crowd of students, their faces a blur of familiarity and anonymity. the absence of hana and mina remained a topic of conversation among the students, but the discussions were tinged with a mixture of gossip and indifference.
inside the school, the hallways seemed more tense than usual. you found yourself at your locker, trying to go through the motions of your day, when haesoo joined you. she leaned against her locker, her face drawn into a thoughtful frown. “it would be a shame if they weren’t such sluts,” she muttered, her voice low. she closed her eyes briefly, as if trying to push away a troubling thought. curiosity piqued, you asked, “what’s the matter?”
ahe shivered slightly and shook her head. “i just got a chill,” she said, her voice uncertain. she seemed lost in thought, her eyes darting around as if searching for something elusive. you watched her, puzzled by her sudden shift in demeanor. “what are you talking about?” you asked, but she was silent, her gaze fixed on something you couldn’t see.
suddenly, her eyes widened in surprise, and she stared in shock. you followed her gaze, your heart skipping a beat as you saw what had caught her attention. there, standing in the middle of the hallway, was park jimin. he was dressed in the school uniform, his appearance disturbingly casual. his smile was both enigmatic and unsettling, a contrast to the surrounding confusion and chatter.
your breath caught in your throat. the sight of him, so out of place in the school environment, was jarring. his presence seemed to draw the eye of everyone in the hallway, though he appeared to be a spectral figure to most, his gaze focused solely on you and haesoo. his eyes locked onto yours, a glimmer of amusement dancing in their depths. he stood with an air of effortless confidence, his posture relaxed yet commanding. the contrast between his calm demeanor and the chaos of the school around him only served to heighten the surreal quality of the moment.
haesoo’s expression was a mix of disbelief and fear, her earlier chill now palpable in her wide-eyed stare. you felt a cold shiver run down your spine as jimin’s smile grew, as though he enjoyed the effect he was having on you both. in the midst of the busy school hallway, where students milled about oblivious to the strange encounter, jimin’s presence seemed to create a pocket of stillness. you felt the weight of his gaze on you, a reminder of the enigmatic power he had claimed to possess.
the bell rang, breaking the spell and drawing the attention of the students back to their daily routines. his figure slowly faded from view, his presence slipping away as the normalcy of the school day reasserted itself. haesoo turned to you, her face pale and her voice trembling slightly. “did you see that?” she asked, her words barely audible. you nodded, trying to steady your racing heart. “yes,” you said, your voice tight with unease. “i saw him.”
the classroom rang with the usual chatter as students shuffled in, preparing for the day’s lessons. you took your seat, your mind still preoccupied with the unsettling encounter with jimin from the previous day. the door creaked open, and the noise in the room gradually subsided as the professor stepped in, his usual demeanor composed but with a glimmer of something unspoken in his eyes.
“good morning, everyone,” the professor began, his voice commanding attention. “we have a new student joining us today.”
you looked up, curiosity piqued. as the professor gestured toward the door, your heart skipped a beat when him stepped into the room. he wore the school uniform with an easy grace, his presence immediately drawing the eye. his smile was as enigmatic as ever, a contrast to the standard school attire that seemed almost to constrict the rest of the students.
jimin walked to the front of the class, his every step measured and confident. “hello, everyone,” he said smoothly, his voice carrying a pleasant yet unnerving calm. “i’m park jimin. it’s a pleasure to be here.”
a murmur of surprise rippled through the room, but it was taehyung’s scoff that caught your attention. from his seat at the back of the room, taehyung’s disdain was palpable. “so, what’s your power?” he called out, his tone dripping with skepticism. jimin’s eyes met his with a chilling intensity. “anything you want it to be,” he replied, his voice a low, deliberate drawl.
the room fell silent, and you could feel a shiver run down your spine as the weight of jimin’s words settled over you. taehyung’s expression shifted from confusion to curiosity, but before he could respond, something extraordinary happened. with a fluid motion, the empty desks around the room began to levitate, their wooden forms moving in a synchronized dance. the desks flew through the air, converging on taehyung and trapping him against the wall. the desks pressed around him with a force that was firm but not painful, effectively pinning him in place without causing harm.
taehyung’s eyes widened in alarm as he protested, his voice muffled by the barrier of desks. “what? let me go!” the professor, typically the picture of professional composure, allowed a faint smile to curve his lips, clearly amused by the display. jimin’s gaze remained fixed on taehyung, his expression one of calm detachment.
“if you say so,” he said, his voice laced with a touch of amusement. with a flick of his wrist, he used his telekinetic abilities to lift taehyung into the air. the desks followed suit, returning to their original places as taehyung was gently deposited on the other side of the room, away from the wall.
jimin’s smile widened as he turned to the class. “never gets old,” he remarked, the lightness in his tone belying the impressive display of power he had just demonstrated.
laughter erupted from the students, a mixture of relief and amusement at the unexpected demonstration. you found yourself caught up in the laughter, unable to suppress a grin as you locked eyes with jimin. his gaze held yours for a moment, a silent understanding passing between you. he took an empty seat beside you, his presence both comforting and disconcerting. the room gradually settled down, the buzz of conversation resuming as the class prepared for the lesson. you leaned in, trying to keep your voice low amidst the chatter.
“what are you doing here?” you whispered, your tone a mix of curiosity and apprehension. jimin’s smile remained as he leaned closer, his voice barely audible. “i told you i was your savior,” he whispered back, his eyes twinkling with a hint of mischief.
his words hung in the air, carrying with them a promise of further intrigue. as the professor began the day’s lesson, you found it difficult to concentrate, the encounter with him dominating your thoughts. the reality of his presence in your school, the display of his powers, and his cryptic assurances all melded into a whirlwind of uncertainty and anticipation.
the cafeteria was a hive of activity, alive with the usual din of laughter, chatter, and the clinking of trays and cutlery. the scent of various foods filled the air, mingling with the chatter of students as they moved through the line and found their seats. the vibrant atmosphere of the cafeteria was heightened today, the energy buzzing with heightened excitement and curiosity following jimin's display of power earlier in the day.
as you and haesoo made your way to a table, you noticed the crowd around jimin had only grown. groups of female students swarmed him, their faces alight with admiration as they offered him water, food, and even the best seats in the house. jimin declined each offer with a charming smile and a graceful wave of his hand, his eyes scanning the room as if searching for something.
your gaze met his across the bustling cafeteria, and for a brief moment, his eyes locked onto yours. your heart skipped a beat as haesoo let out a surprised yelp. “is he really coming over here?” she asked, her voice tinged with disbelief. indeed, jimin was making his way toward you, his smile unwavering as he approached your table. he stopped in front of you, his presence commanding attention despite the chaos around him. “may i join you?” he asked, his voice smooth and inviting.
you nodded, still trying to process the surreal turn of events. he took a seat across from you, his posture relaxed yet assertive. the commotion around him seemed to fade into the background as he focused his attention on you, his smile never faltering. the surprise of his arrival was short-lived, however, as you suddenly felt a presence behind you. two hands settled heavily on your shoulders, and you turned to see taehyung’s smirking face looming above you.
“what do you want?” you asked, trying to maintain a tone of annoyance despite the flutter of unease in your chest. taehyung’s smirk widened as he replied, “i haven’t bugged you in a minute. besides, i have unfinished business here.”
before you could react, taehyung shoved you to the side, claiming the seat next to you with a casual disregard. he wrapped an arm around your shoulder, his grip firm and inescapable. you tensed, trying to wriggle free, but his hold was unyielding. “did you have fun humiliating me earlier?” he asked jimin, his tone taunting. his eyes were fixed on him, his smirk never faltering.
jimin’s smile didn’t waver, but his eyes narrowed slightly. “not enough,” he said, his voice carrying a hint of menace. he leaned forward slightly, his gaze locked onto taehyung. “let go of her.” taehyung’s grip tightened instead, pulling you closer into his side. “we’re good friends, aren’t we?” he said, his voice dripping with insincerity.
you turned to jimin, desperation in your eyes. he stood up abruptly, slamming his fork onto the table with a clatter that drew the attention of everyone nearby. he approached taehyung with a purposeful stride, his expression serious. “get up,” he ordered. taehyung’s eyebrows shot up in surprise, but he remained seated, continuing to pick at his food as if unfazed. jimin, however, was undeterred. he reached out and grabbed the collar of taehyung’s uniform, lifting him effortlessly into the air. the cafeteria fell into stunned silence, the usual noise abruptly ceasing as students gasped and murmured in shock.
taehyung dangled in the air, his eyes wide with a mix of fear and disbelief. “how can you do everything at once like that?” he demanded, his voice quivering. jimin’s expression remained composed, his gaze fixed on taehyung with a mixture of mockery and disdain. “would you like to be put down?” he asked, his tone dripping with sarcasm.
taehyung hesitated, his pride warring with his fear, before he finally nodded. jimin, with a casual flick of his wrist, threw taehyung back down onto the floor. the impact was jarring, the sound of him hitting the ground echoing through the cafeteria. you watched in awe as jimin returned to his seat with a casual grace. the room was abuzz with whispers and murmurs, all eyes focused on the spectacle that had just unfolded. your own gaze was fixed on him, unable to hide your amazement.
“how did you do that?” you asked, your voice barely more than a whisper. jimin’s smile broadened, a glimmer of satisfaction in his eyes. “already so impressed?” he replied, his tone light and teasing. “you should be.”
as you trudged home, the crisp evening air provided a slight reprieve from the sweltering heat of the day. the sky was painted with hues of pink and orange as the sun began to set, casting long shadows along the deserted sidewalks. the rhythmic sound of your footsteps echoed against the quiet streets, a comforting metronome in the solitude of your walk.
suddenly, you felt a light tap on your shoulder. you spun around sharply, your heart skipping a beat, but found only the empty street stretching behind you. you frowned, brushing off the sensation as a trick of the mind, and turned back around to continue your journey. however, the sight that greeted you made you catch your breath. jimin stood there, his presence like an unexpected burst of color in the dimming light. his sudden appearance was startling. you exhaled sharply and muttered, “stop doing that.”
a mischievous grin spread across his face, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “you’re pretty like that,” he said, his voice smooth and teasing. you rolled your eyes, trying to ignore the heat rising in your cheeks. “what do you mean by that?” you asked, only to find that he was no longer there. the sudden emptiness where he had been left you feeling slightly disoriented.
you turned around quickly, and there he was again, standing behind you. his grin was unwavering, his eyes filled with playful mischief. “like that,” he repeated, his voice echoing in your ears.
you frowned in exasperation, your patience wearing thin. “stop scaring me,” you demanded, though the hint of amusement in your voice betrayed your frustration. jimin chuckled softly, his laughter a gentle ripple in the quiet evening. “it’s amusing,” he said, his voice lingering in the air as if he were still beside you.
just as you were about to respond, you felt yourself stumble, your foot catching on an uneven patch of sidewalk. before you could fully lose your balance and fall, jimin was there, catching you with effortless grace. he held you steady, his smile warm and reassuring. “but saving you is much better,” he whispered close to your ear.
you looked up at him, a mixture of annoyance and relief in your eyes. “you’re insane,” you said, though your voice carried a hint of gratitude. “i was fine on my own.”
jimin scoffed lightly, his gaze playful. “how did you like the taste of toilet water?” he asked, his tone laced with a teasing edge. your eyes widened in shock. “you saw that?” you gasped, your cheeks flushing with embarrassment.
he rolled his eyes as if this were the most obvious thing in the world. “i see everything,” he said dismissively. you quickly covered yourself, feeling a surge of indignation. “pervert!” you exclaimed, your voice a mixture of mortification and anger.
jimin’s eyes widened in surprise, his expression turning thoughtful. “a pervert?” he repeated, as if he were considering the accusation seriously. after a moment, he raised an eyebrow and asked, “would you like to be sent to the underworld?”
you shook your head vigorously, the thought of such a fate making you shiver. “no!” you said, your voice filled with urgency.
jimin smirked, his expression one of satisfied amusement. “that’s what i thought,” he said, his tone light and mocking.
by the time you reached your front door, jimin was nowhere to be seen. you rolled your eyes, muttering under your breath, “i know you’re there.” the familiar thwack against the back of your head, like an invisible slap, confirmed his lingering presence. you opened the door and stepped inside, where your brother daehyun was waiting. he looked at you with a skeptical expression, his eyes narrowing slightly. “who were you talking to?” he asked, his tone laced with suspicion.
you shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant. “just talking to myself,” you said with a casual wave of your hand. saehyun stared at you, his eyes wide with disbelief. “maybe you really have lost your mind,” he said, shaking his head in awe.
you playfully smacked him on the head, his reaction a mix of surprise and annoyance. “shut up,” you said with a grin, before heading toward your room. as you passed by the kitchen, your mother called out, “you seem to be in a better mood today.”
you paused for a moment, contemplating her observation. it was true that something had shifted within you, a glimmer of unexpected excitement mingling with the confusion. you turned to her and gave a small, genuine smile. “yeah,” you agreed softly. “maybe i am.”
as you closed the door behind you, the click of the lock seemed to echo in the quiet room. you leaned against the door for a moment, letting out a deep sigh as you tried to shake off the day’s events. the room was dimly lit by the slant of moonlight filtering through the curtains, casting long, ghostly shadows that danced across the walls.
when you turned around, you gasped. there, leaning casually against the edge of your bed, was jimin. his presence was both startling and oddly comforting. “i told you to stop doing that,” you said, trying to keep the irritation out of your voice.
jimin rolled his eyes with a dramatic flourish, his expression one of amused exasperation. “you’re easy to scare,” he replied with a smirk that made your heart skip a beat. he tilted his head slightly and added, “you must not be used to having men in your room.”
the comment struck a nerve, and you scoffed, feigning offense. “i’ve had plenty of experience,” you retorted, though the blush rising to your cheeks betrayed the unease you felt.
jimin’s eyes sparkled with suppressed laughter, his lips twitching into a smirk. “yeah, right,” he teased, his tone dripping with playful sarcasm. he paused and then added, “i’ve seen it all, you haven’t gotten laid in eighteen years.”
the jibe made your face flush with a mix of embarrassment and irritation. “i’ll kick your eyes,” you threatened, your voice edged with frustration. jimin raised his hands in mock surrender, a look of exaggerated fear crossing his face. “really?” he asked, his tone a perfect blend of feigned terror and mischief.
you nodded decisively and reached out to slap him, but his reflexes were impossibly quick. he caught your wrist effortlessly, his grip surprisingly firm. you tried to free your hand, but he held it fast. he smiled, a glint of amusement in his eyes. “like that?” he asked, his voice a low, teasing murmur. stunned, you raised your other hand, only to find that he was already there, catching it with equal ease. his strength was undeniable, and no matter how much you struggled, you couldn’t pull free. “don’t hit me that hard,” he said with a teasing lilt, his smile widening.
you were about to retort when he suddenly moved with a fluid, almost predatory grace. before you could react, he had you pinned against your closet door. your breath caught in your throat, and you felt your heart race as his face came dangerously close to yours. the proximity was overwhelming; his scent was intoxicating, and the heat of his body pressed against yours made it hard to think.
his smile was both captivating and unsettling. he leaned in slightly, his eyes locking onto yours with a mix of curiosity and amusement. “why’s your heart beating so fast?” he asked softly, his voice a gentle caress against your ear.
you gulped, your gaze unable to tear itself away from his striking features. his eyes were mesmerizing, and his closeness made you acutely aware of how pretty he truly was. “because you’re scary,” you managed to say, your voice trembling slightly.
jimin scoffed lightly, releasing you with a dramatic flair as if your words had wounded him. “scary? you’re scarier,” he said, feigning offense as he took a step back, allowing you to breathe again.
you rolled your eyes, grateful for the distance, and waved your hand dismissively. “leave me alone. i have homework,” you said, trying to sound authoritative despite the lingering blush on your cheeks. his smile softened as he observed you, his gaze lingering on the flush that had crept up your neck. “homework, huh?” he mused, his tone carrying a hint of mock sympathy. he could clearly hear the rapid thumping of your heartbeat, and it only seemed to please him more.
you settled into your desk, the weight of the day's events still lingering in your mind. the room was dimly lit by the soft glow of your desk lamp, casting a warm, amber hue across the pages of your textbook. you had spread out your notes and textbooks with meticulous care, determined to tackle your calculus homework despite the whirlwind of emotions you were feeling. the air was heavy with the quiet hum of concentration, punctuated only by the occasional scratch of your pencil against the paper.
as you jotted down what you hoped were coherent notes on differential equations, you couldn’t shake the sensation of being watched. the hairs on the back of your neck prickled, and you glanced over your shoulder, half-expecting to see jimin’s mischievous grin. but the room remained empty, save for the clutter of your textbooks and papers. just as you resumed your scribbling, a voice broke the silence. “what are you working on?” jimin’s voice was smooth and casual, yet it carried a hint of amusement.
you jumped, nearly knocking over your pencil. “calculus,” you replied, trying to sound nonchalant as you continued to pretend to write notes. the subject matter, filled with complex equations and symbols, seemed even more daunting with his, once again, unexpected presence.
he strolled over with a lazy grace, his hands tucked into the pockets of his school uniform jacket. his eyes roamed over your paper with a mixture of curiosity and amusement. “do you actually have any idea what you’re doing?” he asked, his tone dripping with mock concern. you glanced up at him, attempting to maintain a facade of confidence. “yes,” you said firmly, though a hint of uncertainty crept into your voice.
jimin’s eyebrow arched skeptically. “are you lying?” he asked, his gaze narrowing as if he were scrutinizing every word you said. you hesitated, caught off guard by his directness. “yes,” you admitted with a sheepish grin, unable to maintain the pretense any longer.
he sighed theatrically, shaking his head with an exaggerated air of disappointment. “lying in the underworld is punishable, you know,” he said, his voice taking on a mock-serious tone. “people get their tongues cut out for that.” your eyes widened in alarm, and you gasped, “are you serious?” the very idea of such a gruesome punishment sent shivers down your spine, and you could hardly believe he was being genuine.
jimin stifled a giggle behind his hand, clearly finding your reaction amusing. “oh, absolutely,” he affirmed with a mischievous glint in his eye. you sighed, your shoulders slumping as you muttered, “i can’t wait to go to heaven.”
he raised an eyebrow and scoffed. “you’d never see heaven’s gates,” he said dismissively, a hint of derision in his voice. your eyes flashed with indignation as you retorted, “you have no idea what you’re talking about.”
jimin’s smirk widened. “you’re right,” he admitted, but his tone was far from apologetic. he glanced at your paper, his expression shifting to one of mild interest. “by the way, the answer to that equation is supposed to be squared,” he said, pointing at a particular spot on your paper with a casual air.
you let out a nervous laugh, feeling a wave of relief mixed with embarrassment. you quickly reached for your eraser, smudging out the scarily wrong answer you had previously written. with a trembling hand, you scrawled the correct answer in its place, hoping it would salvage your assignment. jimin watched you with an amused glint in his eye, seemingly delighted by the small victory of having helped you. his presence, though unsettling at times, had a peculiar way of making the mundane aspects of your life feel more bearable.
the clock on your desk ticked slowly as you fought against the drowsiness that tugged at the edges of your consciousness. your calculus homework lay spread out before you, the equations blurring together as you struggled to keep your eyes open. jimin’s presence was a faint, unsettling comfort in the periphery of your awareness. his earlier antics had faded into the background noise of your weary mind.
as you dragged your pencil across the paper, your eyelids grew heavier, and your head bobbed forward in a half-sleepy state. you mumbled aloud, your voice barely more than a tired whisper. “what are you doing here, jimin?”
a soft chuckle came from him, a sound that seemed to curl around you like a warm blanket. he leaned closer, his voice a low murmur that brushed against your ear. “do you really wanna know?” he asked, his tone laced with both curiosity and amusement. you nodded groggily, barely managing to keep your eyes open. “yes,” you managed to mumble, your voice trailing off as another yawn overtook you.
hia gaze softened, and he settled himself more comfortably on the edge of your desk. “well,” he began, his voice gentle and contemplative, “i’ve always wanted to live my life as a human, in the human world. i get to do that as long as i’m watching over someone.” you squinted at him through half-lidded eyes, the details of his face still fuzzy but recognizable. “why me?” you asked, your voice slurring slightly with exhaustion.
there was a moment of silence as jimin’s expression grew thoughtful. he seemed to weigh his words carefully before speaking again. “guess you were the chosen one, they sent me to you,” he said softly, as if the weight of the words carried a hint of destiny. his lips curled into a faint smile, though there was a touch of irritation in his eyes. “i wouldn’t have picked you if you weren’t so pretty,” he said with a hint of teasing in his voice. “all you do is cause trouble.”
you let out another yawn, your head nodding forward. “sorry,” you murmured, the apology barely audible as you fought to stay awake. you groaned softly, burying your face in your arms on the desk, too tired to respond. the relentless pull of sleep was too strong, and within moments, you succumbed to it, your breathing evening out as you drifted into a deep, much-needed slumber.
jimin watched you with a mixture of amusement and tenderness. as your breathing became steady and rhythmic, he let out a soft sigh, his gaze lingering on you with an almost wistful expression. he knew it was invasive, to watch you sleep like this, but he couldn’t help himself. there was something undeniably captivating about the way you looked when you were so peaceful and unguarded.
gently, he extended his powers, lifting you with a delicate touch of his mind. the process was effortless for him, and he guided you gently off the desk, ensuring you remained undisturbed. with a subtle concentration, he levitated you through the air, carrying you with the same care one might use to handle a fragile, precious object. he maneuvered you softly through the room, avoiding any obstacles as he floated you to your bed. as you were lowered onto the mattress, he took a moment to adjust the covers around you, tucking them in with a tender touch that belied his usual mischief.
he stood by the side of your bed, watching you with a soft, almost reverent gaze. you were curled up beneath the covers, your features relaxed and serene. the sight of you, so vulnerable and tranquil, stirred something within him—a curious blend of protectiveness and admiration. despite his role as a being from the underworld, tasked with watching over you and perhaps even unsettling you at times, he found himself captivated by your presence. the way your lashes rested against your cheeks, the gentle rise and fall of your chest with each breath, it all seemed to weave a kind of magic that he hadn’t expected to encounter.
as you trudged to school the following morning, the familiar hustle and bustle of the crowd provided a modest comfort. the sky above was a muted shade of gray, clouds hanging low as if mirroring the heaviness in your chest. the air was brisk, and you pulled your coat tighter around yourself, feeling the chill seep through despite your layers.
upon arriving at school, you approached your locker with a sigh, trying to shake off the remnants of sleep and the lingering unease from the previous night. however, as you reached your locker, you were startled to see jimin leaning casually against the row of metal lockers, his gaze fixed on you with a playful smirk. he seemed to materialize out of nowhere, his presence as striking and unanticipated as ever.
“slow for someone so thin,” he remarked with a teasing lilt in his voice. his eyes gleamed with mischief, a contrast to the gray morning. “do you ever eat, or is breakfast a myth for you?” you rolled your eyes at his casual tone and retorted, “i had breakfast this morning.” the words came out with more force than you intended, a small, defiant edge in your voice.
jimin’s smirk widened into a full-fledged grin, a flicker of amusement dancing in his eyes. “liar,” he said, his voice dripping with playful derision. “I can tell you’re lying.”
the truth of his statement was a bitter pill to swallow. you hadn’t felt the pangs of hunger as acutely in recent days, and your appetite had waned significantly since the bullying had started. the constant stress had left you feeling hollow, both physically and emotionally. the comment stung more than you’d care to admit, but you forced yourself to look indifferent.
his gaze didn’t waver as he continued, his tone now carrying an edge of mock seriousness. “there goes your tongue,” he said suddenly.
your heart skipped a beat at his words. Instinctively, you raised a hand to your mouth, your fingers pressing against your tongue as you felt a wave of panic. you bit down hard, testing to make sure your tongue was still there. the sharp, familiar pain confirmed it was, and you sighed in relief, though the discomfort of his words lingered. jimin’s eyes gleamed with an unsettling mix of amusement and mystery. “is it still there?” he inquired, his voice low and teasing.
you nodded vigorously, though the movement was almost imperceptible due to your anxiety. his sigh was almost theatrical, filled with a mock sorrow that didn’t match the amusement in his eyes. “it won’t be for long,” he said cryptically, and without another word, he turned on his heel and walked toward the school building.
you called out after him, your voice tinged with a mixture of confusion and frustration. “what do you mean by that?”
jimin merely waved a hand over his shoulder in a dismissive gesture, his smirk remaining as he walked away. the gesture was both casual and enigmatic, leaving you with more questions than answers. his cryptic remark about your tongue gnawed at your thoughts as you stood by your locker, the sudden absence of his presence leaving an unsettling void despite the childish teasing.
as the class droned on, you found it increasingly difficult to focus, the remnants of last night’s exhaustion pulling at your consciousness. your pen had been moving on autopilot, and before you knew it, you had fallen asleep, your head resting heavily on your desk. the soft murmur of your classmates and the occasional rustling of papers seemed far away, a distant backdrop to your restless slumber.
suddenly, a loud voice jolted you awake. “homework, everyone.” the professor announced, his tone authoritative. you gasped, the realization hitting you like a cold splash of water. the panic set in as you scrambled to recall where you had left off. the professor began walking down the aisles, and you could feel your heart pounding in your chest.
when he reached your desk, you fumbled with your notebook, your movements clumsy and disjointed. you retrieved it with a mix of shame and dread, handing it over to him with trembling hands. the professor’s eyebrows knitted together in surprise as he flipped through the pages, his expression shifting from curiosity to astonishment.
“did you really do all of this?” he asked, incredulous. his eyes were wide as he scanned the pages filled with neatly written answers, each question meticulously addressed and correctly solved.
you blinked, equally puzzled. “what do you mean?” you asked, trying to piece together what was happening.
the professor pointed to your notebook. “you’ve completed every single problem correctly,” he said, his voice a mix of amazement and disbelief. “this is impressive.”
you glanced down at the notebook and saw, to your shock, that every question was indeed answered accurately. a wave of confusion washed over you. you hadn’t remembered doing all this work, and the sense of accomplishment felt both foreign and surreal. as you tried to process the unexpected turn of events, you caught sight of jimin across the room. his gaze was fixed on you, and he offered a sly smile. he mouthed the words, “you’re welcome,” with a mischievous glint in his eyes. relief mixed with curiosity bubbled inside you.
the professor congratulated you, his expression softening with approval, and handed your notebook back. you muttered a thank you, still trying to shake off the disorienting sense of having accomplished something you didn’t remember doing.
at lunch, you headed to the cafeteria, hoping to sit with jimin. as you approached the table where you usually met him, your heart sank when you saw taehyung sitting there instead. he looked up as you arrived, and you could see a smirk forming on his lips. “what do you want now?” you asked, your tone weary but guarded.
he raised his hands in a mock gesture of surrender. “i promise i won’t do anything,” he said, a hint of playful mischief in his voice. “actually, i was wondering if you’d like to go out with me sometime.” you were stunned into silence. the unexpected proposition caught you off guard, leaving you at a loss for words. before you could find a response, haesoo opened her mouth, but her words were cut off by a commanding voice.
“move,” jimin said sharply, his voice cutting through the noise of the cafeteria like a knife.
all three of you turned to see him standing there, his demeanor suddenly shifting from relaxed to intense. his gaze was fixed on taehyung, and he took a step forward with a steely resolve. taehyung’s smirk faltered slightly. “go around,” he said dismissively, “i’m in the middle of something.”
to your shock, his expression darkened. he slammed his tray down on the table, the clatter of metal against plastic loud and jarring. he grabbed taehyung by the collar and pulled him close, his voice dropping to a low, menacing whisper. “unless you wanna be in the middle of nowhere, walk away.”
the tension in the air was palpable. taehyung’s eyes widened in surprise, and without another word, he backed away, his earlier bravado gone. he turned on his heel and walked off, leaving the space around you suddenly quieter.
you were left in stunned silence, your heart racing. jimin’s transformation from the charming, playful figure to someone so intimidating and cold was jarring. his capacity for sudden, intense aggression scared you, and you felt a shiver run down your spine. you tried to ignore him, focusing on your food and conversation with haesoo, not wanting to attract his attention or fall victim to whatever mood he might switch to next.
the walk home was eerily quiet, the usual chatter and clamor of the bustling streets muted by a heavy silence. the afternoon light was beginning to fade, casting long shadows that seemed to stretch endlessly along the pavement. you could hear the rhythmic patter of your footsteps and the occasional rustle of leaves in the breeze, but jimin’s presence beside you added an unusual tension to the otherwise tranquil surroundings.
he had been walking silently next to you for a while, his stride effortlessly matching yours. his presence, though subdued, was impossible to ignore. he seemed to be waiting for you to say something, his eyes occasionally flicking towards you with a hint of curiosity. finally, he broke the silence. “what’s wrong?” he asked, his tone casual but with an underlying edge that suggested he was genuinely interested.
you gave a dismissive wave of your hand and forced a small smile. “nothing,” you assured him, trying to sound more confident than you felt. jimin’s expression shifted to one of mild annoyance. “you must think i’m stupid if you’re gonna brush it off like that,” he said, his voice laced with a mixture of impatience and amusement.
you sighed, feeling a pang of guilt. “i was just thinking. thanks for doing my homework, by the way.” jimin’s lips curled into a faint smirk. “you’re welcome. i’m nice like that.”
you paused, considering his words. “but there was no reason to be so cruel to taehyung,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. jimin’s eyes narrowed slightly. “really? were you actually gonna go on a date with that asshole?” he asked, his tone dripping with disdain.
you contemplated his question, trying to remember how you’d felt about taehyung’s offer. “maybe,” you said jokingly. his eyes widened with incredulity. “your tongue’s on the verge,” he said, rolling his eyes dramatically.
you gasped in mock horror and instinctively placed your hand over your mouth, as if to shield it from his prying. “stay away from my tongue,” you pleaded with a blend of annoyance and playfulness. jimin merely chuckled. “no promises,” he said, his tone light and teasing. this caused you to walk with your hand still covering your mouth, a futile gesture that did little to ease the odd sensation his presence brought.
when you reached your front door, you felt a sudden tug on the hand on your mouth. you spun around to confront jimin, ready to give him a piece of your mind. but as you turned, he was gone. the sudden absence of his presence was startling, leaving you standing there with a mix of frustration and confusion.
“asshole,” you muttered under your breath, the word barely escaping your lips as you glanced around to make sure he wasn’t lingering nearby. the street was empty, save for a few stray leaves skittering along the sidewalk, and there was no sign of jimin. with a resigned sigh, you pushed open the front door and slipped inside, the familiar warmth of your home a welcome contrast to the unsettling events of the day. you walked straight to your room, the encounter with jimin still fresh in your mind. the door clicked shut behind you, and you leaned against it for a moment, letting out a deep breath.
the room was cloaked in the soft, golden light of the late afternoon, casting long shadows that danced gently on the walls. the steady hum of your ceiling fan created a comforting backdrop as you sat on the edge of your bed, your thoughts tangled in a web of confusion and disquiet. jimin’s unpredictable behavior had been gnawing at you. one moment, he was charming and helpful, and the next, he was cold and menacing. the abrupt change in his demeanor was unsettling, and the weight of it made you uneasy. you needed a distraction, something to take your mind off the troubling thoughts.
with a resigned sigh, you turned on the tv. the screen flickered to life, and you absentmindedly began channel surfing, your mind not fully engaged with the images flashing before you. but then, a news anchor’s stern face filled the screen, and you were abruptly pulled into the broadcast. “—tragedy that has shaken the community. the bodies of oh mina and jung hana, two missing students, have yet to be found, and authorities now presume them dead. the search continues, but their families are left in agonizing uncertainty.”
you froze, your heart sinking as the anchor continued with a detailed recap of the events. the broadcast went on to describe the search efforts, the emotional pleas from their families, and the growing sense of despair that had settled over the community. the words felt like a physical weight pressing down on your chest, and a surge of guilt began to eat away at you. mina and hana had been cruel, yes, but no one deserved this. the thought of their families—worrying, grieving, and facing a future without their loved ones—made you feel sick. you found yourself grappling with the dissonance between their past actions and the very real, very human suffering unfolding now.
as you absorbed the gravity of the news, a familiar voice cut through your thoughts, chilling and disturbingly calm. “they got what they deserved,” jimin’s voice said, as though he had materialized out of thin air. he stepped into view, leaning casually against the door frame, his gaze fixated on the tv screen. “it’s a shame they aren’t actually dead.”
you turned to him, your eyes wide with shock and disbelief. “how can you say something so cruel?” you demanded, the hurt and anger evident in your voice. “how can you be so heartless?”
his expression hardened, his eyes narrowing slightly. “it’s always been an eye for an eye,” he retorted coldly. “they were awful to you. why should they get any sympathy?”
a surge of frustration erupted within you. “and what about their families?” you asked, the words coming out in a rush. “do you have any idea how they must feel?”
jimin snapped, his tone edged with bitterness. “they should’ve raised them better,” he shot back. “maybe then they wouldn’t have turned out the way they did.”
you were taken aback by his callousness. “you’re awful,” you said, unable to keep the scorn from your voice. “i can’t believe how heartless you really are.”
jimin’s demeanor shifted abruptly. he walked over and sat down beside you on your bed, his movements deliberate and measured. he looked at you with an intensity that was almost palpable, his gaze piercing through your defenses. “i did it for you,” he said softly, his voice losing some of its earlier bite. “because i cared for you.”
you looked at him, struggling to reconcile this softer side of him with the cruelty you’d just witnessed. “i don’t need a savior,” you said quietly, shaking your head. the weight of the day’s events and jimin’s complex personality were starting to feel overwhelming. his face softened, and for a moment, his expression was filled with a kind of sadness that seemed almost genuine. he reached out and gently brushed a strand of hair from your face, his touch light and almost tender. in his eyes, you saw something akin to heartbreak.
“okay,” he whispered, his voice barely audible. “if that’s what you say.”
without another word, he vanished, leaving you alone in the dim light of your room. the silence that followed was heavy, filled with the echoes of the harsh words and the complexities of his character. you sat there, feeling the weight of his absence and the lingering discomfort of his presence. the room seemed emptier now, and you were left with a tumult of emotions and unanswered questions.
the night stretched long and restless as you tossed and turned beneath your tangled sheets, your mind an endless swirl of confusion and disquiet. your bed seemed to have become a cage, its confines growing tighter with each passing minute. the darkness of the room was punctuated only by the faint moonlight filtering through the curtains, casting fleeting shadows that danced unsettlingly on the walls.
you reached out in the darkness, searching for the comforting presence you had come to rely on. but tonight, there was nothing. no whisper of jimin’s voice, no flicker of his enigmatic smile—just an overwhelming silence that pressed against you like a heavy blanket. you called out his name, your voice barely more than a strained whisper in the stillness of the night. “jimin?” you croaked, the sound swallowed by the oppressive quiet.
the silence that followed was deafening. It seemed to stretch on forever, growing thicker and more suffocating with each passing moment. you strained to listen for any sign of him, but there was nothing—no rustle, no breath, no hint of his presence. desperation clawed at you, and you forced yourself to close your eyes, willing yourself to sleep, hoping that he would return with the dawn.
morning came, but with it, there was no sign of jimin. you woke with a start, the emptiness of your room a reminder of his absence. the space beside you on the bed was untouched, the air still and untroubled. you groaned, the reality of his disappearance settling heavily upon you. the morning routine was carried out on autopilot, the small tasks seeming to blur together as you prepared for school.
arriving at school, you felt the weight of his absence more acutely. the hallways, usually bustling with energy and life, felt hollow and empty. you walked through them with a growing sense of dread, your eyes scanning the familiar faces for any sign of jimin. but he was nowhere to be found. not in the crowded corridors, not in your classroom, not even in the places he had been known to linger.
you approached haesoo at lunch, a flicker of hope driving your steps. you needed to know if anyone else had seen him, if there was any chance he would reappear. “hey, haesoo,” you said, trying to keep your voice steady despite the anxiety you felt. “have you seen jimin today?”
she looked up from her lunch with a puzzled expression. “jimin? no, i haven’t seen him. why? you two seemed pretty close. he was kind of like your protector, wasn’t he?” you shook your head, trying to quell the gnawing worry in your stomach. “he isn’t,” you said, forcing a casual tone into your voice. “he’s my savior.”
the rest of the school day passed in a blur of gray and disinterest. the absence of jimin cast a shadow over everything, and you found it difficult to focus on the lessons or the conversations around you. It was almost as if the world had lost some of its color without him. when the final bell rang, you walked home with a heavy heart. each step felt like a step further away from the fleeting hope you had clung to. you tried to convince yourself that his absence was due to the lack of need, that perhaps he was simply giving you space. but deep down, you knew it was more than that. you had made him go away, whether intentionally or not, and the realization left you feeling hollow and uncertain.
as you neared your house, you saw haesoo walking beside you, her expression bright and expectant. “so, what do you think?” she asked, her eyes twinkling with excitement. “wanna hit the club tonight? it could be a lot of fun.” you considered it for a moment, your spirits lifted slightly by the prospect of distraction. “sure, that sounds good,” you agreed, trying to push aside the nagging emptiness you felt.
when you reached home, haesoo followed you inside. you found your mother in the kitchen, busy with the evening’s preparations. “mom, is it okay if i go to the club with haesoo tonight?” you asked, attempting to sound casual.
your mother glanced up from her task, her face thoughtful. “if she’s going,” she said with a dismissive wave, “you can go to the underworld for all i care.”
the words struck you like a chill, freezing the air around you. the mention of the underworld made your blood run cold, a sharp reminder of the dark and mysterious presence you had grown to both fear and depend on. you exchanged a look with haesoo, who seemed to notice the change in your demeanor but chose to remain silent. you forced a smile, nodding in acknowledgment. “thanks, mom.”
the evening was a muted whirl of apprehension and fleeting hope as you prepared for the night out. the room was dimly lit by the soft glow of a bedside lamp, casting warm hues over the meticulously arranged wardrobe. you stood before the mirror, scrutinizing your reflection as you adjusted the sleek black dress that clung to your frame. it was a classic choice, understated yet elegant, but tonight, it felt lacking—an empty vessel yearning for validation you could not quite grasp.
you turned this way and that, trying to find satisfaction in your appearance. the dress, with its delicate fabric and subtle sheen, was perfect in its own right. but it felt as if something crucial was missing. your mind wandered to the image of him, the elusive presence that had once been a source of comfort and assurance. the empty space beside you in the mirror seemed to echo with his absence, and the longing for his approval gnawed at you with an intensity that left you feeling hollow.
with a deep sigh, you slipped your heels on, their click against the hardwood floor a sharp contrast to the muted sense of resignation you felt inside. daehyun’s voice broke through your reverie. “call if anything happens,” he said, his tone carrying a hint of concern. you nodded absentmindedly, giving him a half-hearted smile before heading out the door.
the night air was crisp and cool as you caught a cab to the club. the city lights blurred by the window seemed to race past you, each passing moment amplifying the sense of anticipation and uncertainty that clung to you. when you arrived, haesoo was waiting outside, her excitement palpable as she greeted you with a bright smile.
the club was alive with an electric energy, the pulsating lights and thumping bass creating an intoxicating atmosphere. haesoo led you inside, her hand firmly clasped around yours as you navigated through the crowd. “loosen up,” she urged, her voice barely audible over the music. “have a drink. it’ll help you relax.”
you allowed yourself one drink, the cool liquid sliding down your throat and momentarily easing the tension in your shoulders. you clutched the glass tightly, savoring the brief reprieve it offered as you observed the throng of bodies swaying rhythmically on the dance floor. the music was a relentless beat, each pulse a reminder of the vitality you felt slipping away. as you sipped your drink, a tap on your shoulder broke your reverie. you turned around, half-expecting to see jimin’s familiar, mischievous smile. instead, you were met with the gaze of an unfamiliar man. he had a confident demeanor, his eyes appraising you with an intensity that set your nerves on edge.
“you’re a gem,” he said, his voice smooth and insistent. “would you like to dance?” you offered a polite smile, shaking your head as you replied, “no, thank you. i’d prefer to stay here.”
undeterred, the man pressed on. “come on, don’t be shy. it’ll be fun.” you declined again, but his persistence quickly turned into forcefulness. before you could fully react, he grabbed your hand with a firm grip, pulling you towards the dance floor. you resisted, trying to free yourself from his grasp, but his other hand reached out to grab your jaw. his touch was rough and invasive as he forced you to look at him. “you’re coming with me whether you like it or not,” he said, his tone brooking no argument.
panic surged through you, but before you could cry out for help or struggle further, the man was abruptly thrown backward. he collided with the wall across the room with a violent thud, the impact reverberating through the space. the music abruptly stopped, plunging the club into a stunned silence as gasps spread through the crowd.
your heart raced, but as you watched the man slump against the wall, his head hanging limply, a smile tugged at the corners of your lips. you knew—had always known—that he was still there. the subtle, yet unmistakable, presence that had become so familiar to you was now unmistakable in the man’s sudden, forceful removal.
the crowd was a sea of shocked expressions, their murmurs rising in a crescendo of disbelief. you stood amidst them, your gaze locked on the spot where the man had fallen, feeling a profound sense of relief and, oddly enough, satisfaction. you could not see him, but his protective presence was unmistakable, the unspoken assurance that he was watching over you even now.
the night clung to you like a heavy blanket as you made your way home, the darkness of the streets mirroring the turmoil inside your heart. the taxi dropped you off at the curb, the hum of the engine fading into the background as you stood before your front door, fumbling with your keys. your hands trembled slightly, the chill of the midnight air seeping into your bones, and you struggled to fit the key into the lock. after what felt like an eternity, the lock finally clicked open, and you pushed the door open with a soft creak.
the house was enveloped in silence, your family long since retired to bed. the only sounds were the faint ticking of a clock somewhere in the darkness and the quiet thud of your heels against the wooden floor as you hurried up the stairs. excitement surged through you as you reached your room. with a flick of the switch, the room was bathed in warm light, but your excitement quickly turned to crushing disappointment. the room was empty.
the realization hit you like a ton of bricks, the breath leaving your lungs in a quiet, defeated sigh. you had hoped, prayed even, that he would be there, waiting for you as he always had been. but the room was devoid of that familiar presence, and the weight of his absence settled heavily on your chest.
you let the door swing shut behind you as you sank onto your bed, the soft mattress barely registering beneath you as you buried your face in your hands. the tears came unbidden, spilling down your cheeks in hot, silent streams as you whispered into the empty room, “i’m sorry, i’m so sorry for making you go away.”
the words broke the silence, and you felt the sobs rising within you, shaking your small frame as you struggled to keep them quiet. you pressed your lips together, trying to stifle the sounds that threatened to spill out, but it was no use. the pain was too much, too raw, and it poured out of you in ragged breaths as you continued, “i’m sorry for saying i didn’t need you. i do, i really do, jimin.”
the room remained still, the silence that followed your confession only deepening the ache in your chest. you felt like you were falling into an endless abyss, the darkness and loneliness closing in around you until it was almost suffocating. you cried harder, the tears blurring your vision as you clutched your knees to your chest, rocking slightly as you tried to find some semblance of comfort.
and then, just as the despair threatened to consume you entirely, a voice—familiar and tinged with amusement—cut through the silence. “you’re ruining your makeup.”
your head snapped up so fast you almost felt dizzy, your heart leaping into your throat as you searched the room with wide, tear-filled eyes. and there he was, standing by the window, the corners of his lips curled into that playful smile that made your heart skip a beat. you couldn’t help yourself. you were off the bed and across the room in an instant, throwing yourself into his arms with such force that you nearly knocked him over. he let out a soft laugh as he wrapped his arms around you, holding you close as you buried your face in his chest, your tears dampening the fabric of his shirt.
“you must’ve really missed me,” he teased, his voice a gentle murmur against the top of your head. you nodded against him, unable to find the words to express the overwhelming relief that washed over you. “i’m so sorry,” you managed to choke out, the words coming out in a rush, desperate to make him understand. “i didn’t mean it, jimin. i didn’t mean any of it.”
he pulled back slightly, just enough to cup your face in his hands, his thumbs brushing away the tears that continued to fall. there was a softness in his gaze that made your heart ache, but his next words were laced with playful teasing, “i don’t know if i can forgive you,” he said, feigning hurt. your frown deepened as more tears pooled in your eyes, your bottom lip trembling as you whispered, “i’m sorry, i’ll do anything, jimin. anything.”
he peered at you from the corner of his eye, a sly smile tugging at his lips as he pretended to think it over. “anything?” he asked, his tone light but his eyes watching you intently. you nodded without hesitation, willing to do whatever it took to make things right between you.
a mischievous glint appeared in his eyes as he pointed to his cheek. “give me a kiss.”
you didn’t hesitate. you leaned in, pressing your lips gently to his cheek, the warmth of his skin grounding you in a way that nothing else could. but before you could pull back, he turned his head, and your lips met his in a kiss that sent a jolt of electricity through your entire body. he smiled into the kiss, and you couldn’t help but smile too, the weight of your earlier sadness lifting as you melted into him. the kiss was soft and sweet, a silent promise that you had been forgiven. but there was an underlying intensity that made your heart race, a sense of longing that neither of you could ignore.
when you finally broke the kiss, you looked up at him, your eyes searching his as you whispered, “don’t go anywhere ever again.” his forehead rested against yours, his breath warm against your lips as he replied, “i won’t, i promise.”
the words were barely out of his mouth before his lips were on yours again, this time more urgent, more demanding. you responded in kind, your hands tangling in his hair as you pulled him closer, the kiss deepening until you were both breathless. His hands roamed your back, pulling you flush against him as the intensity of the moment grew. the room seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of you in a world of your own creation, where nothing else mattered but the feel of his lips on yours, the warmth of his body against yours, and the unspoken connection that bound you together.
breathy gasps filled the air as the kiss became more intense, more desperate. his hands slid to your waist, pulling you even closer as the world around you continued to disappear. on that moment, nothing else mattered—no doubts, no fears, no regrets. there was only him, only you, and the undeniable pull between you that refused to be denied.
his fingertips trailed down your sides, reaching the hem of your shirt, and with one smooth motion, he lifted it over your head, tossing it aside to expose your braless tits. your nipples pebbled at the sudden coolness of the air, and jimin’s eyes darkened with desire as he took in the sight of you. “so beautiful,” he murmured, his voice a low growl that sent shivers down your spine.
you reached for the button of his pants, fumbling with the zipper as you felt his hands move to the back of your neck, tracing the skin with his nails, his eyes feasting on your naked tits. his gaze was hungry, and it made you feel powerful, desired. without breaking eye contact, you lowered yourself to your knees, your heart racing as you took his hardening cock into your hand.
his breath hitched as you leaned in, your hot breath ghosting over the tip before you took him into your mouth. jimin’s hands found your hair, his grip tightening as you began to suck, your tongue swirling around him, exploring every inch of his length. you moaned around him, the sound vibrating through him and making his knees tremble. his moans grew more intense, his words a mix of praise and demand as he guided your head, pushing deeper into your mouth.
his eyes never left yours as he watched you, the way your cheeks hollowed out, the way your tongue danced around him. “so good to me,” he murmured, his voice strained with pleasure. “but i know what you really want, don’t i?” you pulled back, panting, and nodded. you knew exactly what he wanted. without another word, you stood up, and together you moved to the bed, his hand never leaving the small of your back, guiding you, claiming you. your heart raced as you felt the mattress dip beneath you, his weight pressing you into the softness.
his hands were everywhere, exploring your body as if it was the first time, because it was. every touch felt new, every kiss a revelation. he pulled your panties down, his eyes never leaving yours as he exposed your vulnerable pussy to him. your cheeks flushed with a mix of excitement and nerves. he leaned down, his breath hot against your skin as he whispered, “no one else will ever have you like this.”
his mouth found your clit, and you gasped, your hands gripping the sheets as he began to lick and suck. the sensation was overwhelming, and you couldn’t help but buck your hips against his face, desperate for more. he chuckled against you, the vibration sending waves of pleasure through your body. “you’re so eager,” he said, his voice muffled against your skin. “it’s almost obvious you're a virgin.”
you moaned in response, unable to form a coherent argument as he worked his magic. your body tensed, the pressure building until it was almost unbearable, and then with one slick thumb sliding into your ass, you shattered, your orgasm crashing over you like a tidal wave. your eyes squeezed shut as you rode the waves of pleasure, feeling him licking up every drop of your arousal as your pussy spasmed around his thumb.
when you finally opened your eyes, jimin was hovering over you, his own pants and boxers a discarded mess on the floor. the tip of his cock nudged against your entrance, and he smirked down at you, his eyes full of mischief. “came for me just like that, huh?” he asked, his voice thick with lust. you nodded, unable to form words, and he pushed inside you with a groan that seemed to come from the very depths of his soul. you were tight around him, your body untouched by anyone else, and he took his time, savoring every inch as he filled you completely.
his hips began to move, slow and deliberate, and you could feel him stretching you, filling you in a way that was both painful and exquisite. he leaned down, capturing your mouth in a bruising kiss as he whispered, “i’m gonna ruin you for anyone else, you know that?” you didn’t care about the pain. you only cared about the way he felt inside of you, about the way his kiss made you feel alive. you wrapped your legs around his waist, urging him deeper, needing more of him as he broke through your barrier with a gentle but firm thrust. a gasp tore from your throat, but it was quickly followed by a moan as pleasure began to overtake the initial discomfort.
jimin’s eyes never left yours as he began to move in earnest, his hips sliding in and out of you with an ease that belied the tightness of your grip on him. you could feel your body adjusting to him, stretching and clinging to him like a second skin. the filth that left his mouth grew more intense, his words a filthy litany that had you squirming and whimpering beneath him. “fuck, i love you. only mine, no one else's.” he growled, his thumb finding your clit and rubbing it in slow, firm circles that had your eyes rolling back in your head.
your orgasm built again, more intense than the first. your pussy was slick with arousal, and with every thrust, he hit that perfect spot deep inside of you, making your toes curl and your back arch. he was relentless, his mouth moving from your lips to your neck, nipping and sucking as he claimed you in every way possible. and then, just as the tension was about to snap, he slammed into you, his thumb pressing harder on your clit, and you were coming apart, your body shaking with the force of it.
you felt him swell inside of you, his cock pulsing as he reached his own climax, filling you with his warmth. he groaned your name against your neck, his entire body tensing as he emptied himself into you. the sensation was unlike anything you had ever felt, a mix of pleasure and possession that had you clinging to him as if he was the only thing keeping you tethered to reality.
when it was over, you lay there, panting and trembling, your body still fluttering with the aftershocks of your orgasm. jimin kissed you softly, his breath hot against your skin as he whispered, “no one else will ever touch you like this, remember that.” you nodded, your voice a mere whisper as you promised, “only you, jimin. only ever you.” he pulled out, and you felt the sticky warmth of his cum trickling down your thighs.
he lay beside you, pulling you into his arms, your bodies entwined as the last of the adrenaline slowly drained away. your heart was still racing, but it was a good kind of scared, the kind that came from knowing you had just given yourself to someone who would protect you with every fiber of his being. you knew he was from the underworld, that he had come to protect you, and in that moment, you had never felt safer.
after a few moments of quiet, he smirked and broke the silence with a question that took you by surprise. “was that really your first time?” his voice was low, slightly teasing, but there was an edge of genuine curiosity there that made you raise an eyebrow. you scoffed lightly, still feeling the lingering warmth from the kiss. “yeah,” you replied with a hint of sarcasm, “my first time just happened to be with a demon from the underworld.” the words were meant to be a joke, but the moment they left your lips, you realized how bizarrely true they were.
jimin propped himself up on his elbows, feigning offense as he stared at you with mock indignation. “how could you be so cruel as to call me that?” he asked, his tone playful but with a glint of something deeper in his eyes, something that made you want to tease him further just to see where it would lead.
you couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped you, the tension from earlier easing into something lighter, more playful. “you’re right,” you conceded, your voice softening as you leaned in to plant a gentle kiss on his lips. the brief contact sent a familiar warmth through you, and when you pulled back, you locked eyes with him and continued, “you’re not a demon. you’re my savior.”
the words hung in the air between you, heavy with meaning. for a moment, you both stayed like that, the intensity of your earlier exchange lingering in the quiet space. his gaze softened, the teasing glint fading into something more serious as he studied your face, as if committing every detail to memory. he sighed softly, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips as he reached up to brush a stray strand of hair away from your face. his fingers lingered on your skin, tracing a gentle path down your cheek before coming to rest under your chin, tilting your face up slightly so he could look you in the eyes. “your savior, huh?” he repeated, his voice barely above a whisper. there was something almost sad in his expression, a hint of vulnerability that you rarely saw from him.
you nodded, your heart pounding in your chest as you held his gaze. “yeah,” you whispered back, your voice filled with a sincerity that left no room for doubt. “you’ve always been there for me, even when i didn’t want you to be. you saved me, jimin.” the admission hung in the air between you, the weight of it pressing down on you both. you saw the way his expression shifted, the playful mask he usually wore slipping away to reveal something raw and unguarded beneath it. his eyes darkened, the intensity in them making your breath catch in your throat.
for a long moment, neither of you spoke, the silence filled with everything you had left unsaid. then, finally, jimin leaned in, closing the small distance between you as he captured your lips in a kiss that was softer, gentler than before. there was no urgency this time, no desperation—just the quiet, undeniable connection that had always existed between you.
when he pulled back, he rested his forehead against yours, his breath warm against your skin as he whispered, “i don’t ever want you to feel like you’re alone again. you understand that, right?” you nodded, your heart swelling with an emotion you couldn’t quite name as you whispered back, “i understand.”
he smiled at that, a small, genuine smile that lit up his entire face. “good,” he murmured, his voice filled with a tenderness that made your chest ache. “because i’m not going anywhere. Not now, not ever.” you leaned into him, closing your eyes as you let the warmth of his presence envelop you, the steady beat of his heart beneath your hand grounding you in the moment. and for the first time in a long while, you felt at peace—like you had finally found the place where you belonged.
the two of you stayed like that for a while, wrapped up in each other, savoring the quiet intimacy of the moment. eventually, he shifted, pulling you closer as he lay back down, his arms encircling you protectively. you nestled against him, your head resting on his chest as you listened to the steady rhythm of his breathing, the rise and fall of his chest lulling you into a sense of calm. as you lay there, your thoughts drifted back to everything that had happened—the confusion, the fear, the overwhelming sense of loss when you thought he was gone for good. but now, in his arms, all of that seemed to fade away, replaced by a certainty that you couldn’t quite explain but knew to be true.
jimin was your savior. and as long as he was by your side, you knew that you would be okay.
✧.*
a/n: this was so cute can't wait to go back to jackson wang cameos and angst
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littlemisshyperfixation · 7 months ago
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Jimin Fic Recommendations
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a - angst f - fluff s - smut
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One Shots
I want to be with you (a s f) by @oddinary4bts ⊹₊⋆ moving to Seoul has always seemed like a good idea, until the bubble bursts when you realize your new neighbor is Park Jimin, and he's not the sweet angel you've always imagined him to be. Will the reality of Park Jimin forever be a nightmare, or will he turn into a sweet dream?
Ho-Ho-Home (a s f) by @jjungkookislife ⊹₊⋆ Golden neighbor extraordinaire, Park Jimin, is (unintentionally) stealing your spotlight this holiday season. Despite your one sided rivalry with him, all Jimin wants is for you to remember him, to remember your past and hopefully create a future with you.
Into the wilderness (a f) by @gukyi ⊹₊⋆ alright, so last summer’s camp was... disastrous. from the murky green showers to the wasps nests, it was all-around a bad time. but none of those things could be quite as catastrophic as the end-of-camp counselor campfire, when you told park jimin that you were in love with him. and if telling him was terrible, then seeing him again this summer, one year after your fruitless confession, just might be the death of you.
The Boyfriend Concept (f s) by @kpopfanfictrash ⊹₊⋆ Win a Date with a Porn Star! You saw the sign when you walked in, of course, but you had no idea your friend dropped your name into the raffle. Fast-forward to later that day, when you actually win. You are horrified, of course, with no intention of accepting and setting yourself up for embarrassment. But then you meet Jimin, and decide this might be worth a shot.
wanna watch a sex tape (s) (ft. taehyung) by @gimmethatagustd ⊹₊⋆ When Taehyung invited you over to watch a movie, you didn’t think the movie he had in mind would be your sex tape… And you definitely didn’t think his roommate would want to watch, too.
feel your touch (a f s) by @jimilter ⊹₊⋆ You have always known yourself to be a sexual switch in bed, flipping between exercising and submitting control according to different situations and partners. And this camboy you are addicted to, one that seems to kinda reciprocate your interest, submits so beautifully that you just want to command him. But when things progress to levels you never anticipated, you end up discovering pleasant surprises that might just change your life.
physical (s) by @ppersonna ⊹₊⋆ you cant seem to escape the sexy fitness instructor that seemingly is everywhere you turn. it’s enough to make you irrational.
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alessiamalfoyzabini · 24 days ago
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Howl at Midnight
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Pairing | werewolf!Jimin x human!Reader
Word Count | 7.5k
Warnings | +18, angst, smut, halloween theme, an apparently abandoned castle (don't trespass on other people's property 🤧), mentions of a pact made with the city's residents, poison, MC doesn't really have much choice 💀, forced nudity, dark themes and also yandere (?), underneath MC finds the situation exciting, bites and marks, sink the canines and drink blood, PWP, oral sex, pussy worship, dubcon, begging, virginity loss, unprotected sex (use protection!), vaginal sex, big dick, knotting, MC abandons herself to her fate (I think Jimin's supernatural nature contributes in MC's choices), eat cum, this is not for minors.
This fanfiction is dark and yandere, if you don't like the genre, don't read and if you are not of age, don't read.
I don't want to hear any complaints in the comments, thank you.
This does not reflect my way of thinking or living at all, it is just a work of fiction, it is like watching a horror movie, many of us love horror movies, but we would never dream of what we see in those movies happening in reality as well.
Simply put, this story was written for entertainment purposes, it should not be seen as a reflection of my values, opinions or morals. I absolutely do not condone such acts.
⤷ Summary | You always thought you lived in a quiet, small town. You never imagined that the locals would be able to keep such a secret for centuries, you fell into their trap… But it doesn't seem so bad.
➢ Author's Note | Hi, guys!!! 🥹
My best friend and I challenged each other to write a Halloween-themed story using the following keywords: werewolf - halloween - virginity - castle - poison.
I don't know why I came up with such a story, it was supposed to be something simple but my dark side took over WAY too much 💀
Anyway my best friend liked the story and suggested that I publish it, so here it is, I already apologize for any mistakes and for the plot which is not who knows what 🥺
Howl at Midnight was written for recreation, but I still hope you enjoy it ❤️
PS: I really didn't know how to classify this story, when in doubt I put the warning “yandere,” since there are behaviors that go a little beyond 😵‍💫
Permanent Taglist | @katherine-kookie, @btsuga-d, @reallygenerouskoala, @takemeaway5402, @velvet-stardust2002, @jimincrystal, @ke1k029, @kylafox09, @pantara, @themwordsblog, @angelicsmilesworld
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It's a rather dark night, you think, as the flickering lights of street lamps barely illuminate your path. You and some of your friends have decided to spend Halloween night roaming the more desolate streets of your small town, rather than attend the party of the school's homecoming queen, the most popular and at the same time most hated girl ever by you and your friends, a common ground that has certainly welded your friendship.
You are reminded of the afternoon you spent at Glenn's house deciding how you would spend Halloween night; Glenn's initiative had been rather unique, since he was not a fan of that holiday.
“It will be fun, everything is so scary at night, we might even meet a real vampire! I mean, not like Edward Cullen, I mean one who doesn't sparkle-” but Glenn's excited monologue had been badly interrupted by his girlfriend, Claire, who had hit him over the head with a book, and who knows why, said book was actually titled Twilight. You remember giggling, willingly accepting that idea, but now...
“We were simply supposed to go for a walk, Glenn,” you mutter ruefully, looking around, “Do you want to tell me where you're taking us?”
The red-haired boy snorts again, settling into his vampire costume bought at a thrift store stall, “Come on Y/N, what would life be without a little thrill?”
Claire, for her part, nods in turn with a euphoric smile, as if she knows something you don't, prancing merrily dressed as a red devil among black lace decorations and lace.
“Life would be as it has always been, wonderful,” you blurt out nervously, freezing suddenly.
The asphalt has run out and the streetlights have stopped dimly illuminating the entire street, you are at the edge of the most talked about lands in your town. When and how exactly did you get there?
“Here we are, my girls,” you hear Glenn say, satisfied with his feat.
“What are we doing here?” you swallow, far from cheerful.
Answering you is Claire, “It's an abandoned castle and this is Halloween night, what do you say?”
You grit your teeth, shaking your head, “You're crazy, I'm not going in there!” you take a step back, your heart stirring, but Glenn stops you in a single moment.
“Where do you think you're going? I promised your brother I'd keep an eye on you,” he tells you sternly, and you know he's right, you can't just leave on your own, the streets are empty but it would still be dangerous.
“Don't you want to see what it's really like inside, aren't you the least bit curious?”
Short answer? No.
More articulate answer? Fuck no.
“Come on, don't be a wimp now!”
You snort, casting a glance at the castle in question.
It is as large as it is gloomy; the older inhabitants of the town have always spoken of the presence of various monsters within it, which is why the lands surrounding the castle are so large, preventing the actual growth of the otherwise large and well-populated town. Some of the land had been ceded to keep the monsters quiet.
That's some bullshit. And you're certainly not a wimp.
What will you find in there, maybe overgrown spiders? You shake your head, certainly nothing up to the Acromantulae seen in Harry Potter.
“I'm not afraid,” you limit yourself to saying, Glenn and Claire seem satisfied with your answer as they begin to step over half of the downed iron bars surrounding the gates of the immense building. It bothers you that they haven't bothered beyond you, but it's Halloween night; you can't really spoil their fun.
You hold on tightly to one of the rusty old iron bars, lift one leg trying not to fall off because of the bulky skirt of your witch costume, and end up straight on the ground covered with dry mud and grass, thank the heavens that it hasn't rained in the last few days, otherwise goodbye costume, although more like an elegant medieval dress and nothing more than that.
“Guys, wait for me!” you exclaim as you turn toward them, but you find yourself rolling your eyes.
The darkness is almost completely pitch black, only the moon high in the sky gives you some brightness in that open space surrounded by green trees and uncultivated grass. Your friends are not there.
“Please tell me this is a joke, please,” you growl, turning only a few seconds to climb over the railing, “Glenn? Claire?”
A shiver of unease snakes down your spine, as if someone - or something - is watching you. But you immediately banish the absurd thought. The Halloween atmosphere always makes everything quite scary; your friends chose that place for that very reason.
Imagining that you simply find them in front of the castle's entrance, you also wander down the path that actually looks like anything else by now. You will meet each other there.
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The wind blows without worrying about your bare shoulders because of the dress's boat neckline; the cape had long since been taken away along the way. You bought it in an antique store and the elderly man seemed quite eager to get rid of it. He even gave you a discount.
The sound of falling leaves under the force of the draught is quite terrifying, especially now that you've discovered you can't use your cell phone. There is absolutely no service there, and isn't that how the best horror movies begin?
A frustrated groan leaves your throat, you don't have to think about it.
“Glenn?” you try to call out once more, but along the path echoes the hoots of an owl that is probably scrutinizing you with condescension, wondering why a silly girl like you is wandering around in such a desolate, godforsaken place.
When you arrive at the gates of the castle, you find yourself admiring the extraordinary Gothic architecture of the huge, ancient building made of stone and marble. The fact that it has survived over the centuries without any kind of restoration is a testament to the good materials that were used.
One by one, you walk down the stone steps, sudden thunder jolts you violently, and with fear in your veins you throw yourself toward the immense reinforced door, finding it ajar, a sign that Glenn and Claire must have already entered. You ignore the hint of annoyance, since they could at least wait for you, you must escape the sudden storm.
Wordlessly you notice the large, thick black clouds enveloping the sky, obscuring even the immense full moon.
You carefully close the ancient gateway, looking around the thick-walled atrium decorated with paintings that are surely worth more than your current home, not to mention the carpet you are walking on, though a bit worn, is definitely from the time of the castle's founding. You wonder which lord lived there and whether it can be traced in the history books.
“Claire?” you whisper, afraid of disturbing someone, but who exactly?
Sighing wearily, you really have no time or inclination to play along with your friends, you rest your hand on the wrought-iron railing of the staircase, beginning to climb so that you can find those two idiots as soon as possible and get home safely.
They say 'God makes them and then matches them up,' right? You mentally growl, well, you would’ve just wiped them out instead.
Between corridors that are not real corridors but dead ends, some narrow and some exaggeratedly large, you finally find the wing reserved for rooms, hating the enormity of that place.
“Hey, you ... are you here?” you ask, slowly opening a bedroom door with one eye closed and one only slightly open, fearing to find the two lovebirds doing strange things in the leto of an abandoned castle, because they would be perfectly capable of it.
But what you find is just a lavishly decorated bedroom absolutely empty of any other life forms but you.
“This is definitely a joke,” you chuckle mirthlessly, clutch your arms to your chest, and continue that unwelcome tour of yours, continuing to open rooms at random, with no more expectation of finding anyone in them, until you come to a rather large bedroom.
Quite different from the others, which up to that point had been yes, beautiful, but empty, lacking a soul.
This one was immense just like the castle itself, yet warm, thanks to the burning fireplace. The four-poster bed was adorned with red silk sheets, as were the velvet curtains tied to the solid wooden columns, on the walls finely decorated with gold paint were hung medieval tapestries, depicting hunting parties, running horses and wolves, wolves everywhere. One that particularly strikes you depicts two wolves and a woman in the center, they seem ready to bite her fiercely, you notice with discomfort.
High glass windows with curtains left open allow lightning to illuminate the entire room, followed by a terrible, howl-like rumble.
That horrible noise seems to awaken you from the sort of trance you fell into while admiring the surely master bedroom, and you finally take serious note of the burning fire. Why a working fireplace in a castle uninhabited for years?
“To many the night brings counsel, to me it has brought a lovely maiden, I see...” you gasp surprised and terrified, turning toward the silky, warm, yet slightly hoarse, almost growling voice.
A relatively young man watches you with his shoulder resting against one of the stained glass windows. You had not seen him. No. He was not there before, you are absolutely sure.
His dark, shiny hair has been grown down to his neck, some curling around his sharp, elegant jaw, the neck left bare by his unbuttoned, white shirt is a set of sinuous, sharp, powerful lines. The soft black pants do nothing to hide the wonderful figure of his long legs, his feet are bare, you notice. He feels perfectly comfortable, as if... as if that were his home.
“I-I... I'm sorry, it's Halloween and some friends of mine thought...” you try to explain with your hands clasped to the skirt of your dress, but you are immediately interrupted by the man's sophisticated, sassy giggle.
“They thought it was a brilliant idea to violate my property?” you pale at his question.
“We... the whole town believes the castle is uninhabited,” you reply with a shy breath, trying to justify them.
The young man breaks away from the glass window, slowly approaching you, you take steps back, inadvertently bumping into one of the pillars of the bed.
“And does it look uninhabited to you, little girl?”
Little girl? By the look of him, he wouldn't seem that much older than you, in fact.
Now that he has moved closer, standing only a foot away from you, you notice details of his face that you did not catch a few moments earlier.
He has high, pronounced cheekbones, and his lips seem so plump and soft that you blush at the thought of kissing them, his nose is well-proportioned and straight, while the peculiar shape of his eyes gives him a rather sweet and angelic air, although the fun written in them is anything but angelic.
“I didn't know, I'm really sorry, sir,” and it's true, the last thing you want is to be a nuisance to someone you don't even know, “I'll get my friends back and we'll leave right away, I promise.”
Dark eyes rimmed with long eyelashes watch you closely, before dropping to the rest of your body. Suddenly you remember the deep cleavage of your witch's dress, your skin burning under his watchful gaze.
“Right now there is no one else in the castle, except you and me,” he approaches again, you can feel his warm breath meet your neck, you shiver as the man clasps one hand above your head, around the pillar of the bed, doing the same with the other. This makes it clear how statuesque his physique is, compared to your more petite one, you also catch a subtle citrus fragrance, light and not cloying, is that him?
With a huge effort, you process his words, widening your eyes. No one else?
“But how-”
“In my opinion you made it all up, little girl,” he sneers, "Just admit that it was your curiosity that drove you here," but you shake your head, vehemently denying it.
“I really came here with friends!” you fret, you've never been good at handling pressure and this guy is not helping you at all.
“Oh, really?” a devilish smile makes its way across his soft, smooth cheeks, "So it's just a coincidence that you're wearing this dress?" you don't know how to answer the question, you can't, not when he lowers a hand over you, brushes the outline of your face with a finger, trailing down the delicate line of your neck to your cleavage, your rippling, shivering skin longs to receive his touch once more, you struggle to recover.
“Th-this dress?” you stammer in shame, his finger is still grazing your chest and you are doing nothing to push it away.
“Mh-mh,” he nods, pushing your cleavage down a few millimeters, enough to make you squeak with red cheeks, “How much do you know about this castle and its owners, little girl?”
Nothing, you'd like to answer, but your eyes already communicate your answer as he pulls back, finally letting you breathe. His scent still hovers around you, though.
“Year 1479, the people of the town of Howl enter into an agreement with the seven lords of Midnight, ceding a part of their lands to these noble lords and agreeing to send a virgin once every ten years, on the so-called Halloween Night,” he narrates, leaving you speechless, “In return, none of the townspeople would be hunted down and killed, does that ring a bell?”
“L-Listen to me, I really don't know what you're talking about, I definitely have to go now,” you nod at your own words, but the door slams shut along with a new and terrible rumble, an anguished cry involuntarily leaving your throat.
“The dress you're wearing is soaked in poison, little girl” the imperious tone terrifies you, automatically your body closes in on itself, as a kind of protection.
“This must definitely be a joke, it is Halloween after all,” you whisper to yourself with tears in your eyes.
“It's a security, for us. It ensures that the girls don't run away, because we are the only ones who can neutralize that poison” you don't know why the man started speaking in plural, you just know that you have to leave, even though something inside you is screaming at you not to. Because it could end very badly.
“You'd better take it off, your body might absorb more poison than is really necessary, the sooner we start the better,” he sighs, beginning to take off his white shirt, showing off a well-built, smooth chest and abs studded with thin scars lighter than his skin, swallowing without any more salivation, following long lines of black ink that weave across his pecs, forming some kind of mark, perhaps related to some cult.
“What are you doing!”
The man tilts his head, his soft hair following the movement meekly, and grasps the edge of his pants, running his forefinger and thumb over it defiantly as he watches you, “I'm taking what was given to me, little girl,” he sneers again, not at all impressed by your shock.
It was not uncommon for him and his brothers to be served girls who were totally unaware of their own destiny, they were tiresome at times, they would not stop shaking and crying, praying not to be deprived of their purity, but you smell so delicious that it might make him go beyond your dullness.
The fabric of his excellent quality pants slowly flows over the flawless skin of his toned legs, the blood rushes straight to your cheeks, and your heart misses a beat with a strangled “iiih” as you realize that the stranger has not only freely undressed in front of you, but is not wearing any underwear.
You've certainly never seen a naked man in person, but based on your anatomy books, that is definitely not a normal penis.
With a strange feeling of dizziness and no little embarrassment, you realize that even at rest, it is definitely big, with a swollen base almost as big as perfectly round testicles and such obvious purplish veins that you wonder if it is actually already hard, in its own way. Could that vibrant pink be an indicator? God, what the hell are you thinking?!
After a little dizziness your eyes fly to the closed door, you have to leave, run.
“Are you sure this is what you want?” he asks you, smiling with a hint of danger in his eyes, “Do you want to run? Run away from me? Know that this will only excite me more.”
You try to look away from his cock, with extreme difficulty, as he spoke, his cock had moved slightly, as if agreeing with the man's words. You ignore the slight jolt between your legs.
“If I can get through the gates of your property, will you let me go?” you propose almost shyly, staring into his sly eyes.
“Um... if I let you go, you'd die from the poison, but if that's what you want...” he shrugs, making you frown. The story of the poisoned dress might be bullshit to convince you to let him fuck you, but what if it's not?
You shake your head, it's all just a bluff. This man is clearly a pervert, maybe he gets off on fucking on such nights with stranger women.
“That's what I want.” you assure with a note of panic in your voice, the desire to escape is so urgent you can hardly think, “Open the door.”
But the man shakes his head, “Strip and I will leave you free to roam my lands until I find you.”
“I don't-!” the words die between your lips, his singsong expression gone, giving way to a sternness that clashes with his regal features, the difference making that contrast frightening.
“I like to play, little girl ... but I don't tolerate whining, don't make me angry, because I might decide to take you now, we have a bed available right here and now,” he hisses, clenching his fist against the polished wooden backboard of the four-poster bed. The more he looks at you, the more his balls throb fiercely; he's trying to control his desire; if his cock hardens, that's the end.
You're the first woman he's seen in 60 years, finally his turn has come, and there's no way he'll let you go. Do you want to play? He'll let you, but eventually you'll give in to his desires. The scent of your sweet virgin pussy makes his wolf growl, eager to get out to meet you.
Perhaps you sense something strange, because with trembling fingers you go to unbutton the side opening of your dress, a little sorry to him, the plunging neckline raises and shapes your breasts invitingly, though the stench of the poison with which it is imbued leaves him disgusted. An idea of humans to persuade chosen women not to flee, his eyes scroll over the ancient clock hanging above the door, the hands turn and you have just four hours to go before the poison takes effect, killing you. He would be sorry to see you die without having had a chance to taste you first.
“Tic-Tac, the clock is ticking, little girl... the slower you are, the more likely you are to die,” he informs you with a smile, your fear written all over his face igniting his loins; he has to restrain himself so he doesn't jump on you, and you're aware of that now, too.
Your eyes study his shoulders, they have stiffened noticeably, and with embarrassing speed you unfasten the last side button, letting the soft black fabric of your dress slip off like a veil, leaving you in your bra and panties. You start up under his eyes, which move to observe every nook and cranny of your body, from the soft breasts enclosed in the cups of the purple lace bra, going lower and lower, past the delicious curve of your hips to the tightly clasped mount of Venus covered by more purple lace. You yourself realize that for a man who wants to possess you, that kind of lingerie might make you look like a neatly wrapped gift in his eyes.
“Don't stop,” he tells you hoarsely, his eyes veiled with glowing lust.
The blood leaves your veins; if he were to take you, you would already be ready to receive him. As your fingers move to get rid of your bra as well, you realize you don't find it such a disturbing idea after all, even when you finally pull down the light fabric of your panties, showing off something no boy has ever had the honor of looking at, his nostrils flaring as if to inhale something in the air, you are aroused.
“You'd better start running, little girl, I'm going to give you exactly twenty seconds head start,” his voice comes out as a guttural sound, making you widen your eyes and really run, when the door suddenly opens wide.
You don't even wonder what strange contraption he used to close or open the door without having to physically do it, you just know you are definitely in danger.
Every nook and cranny of the castle is an unknown, he owns it, he may know passages unknown to you; therefore, you always try to wander the corridors with no visible openings. A tense, animalistic roar makes you scream in terror, with spirited eyes you look down the stairs, you are close to the stairs to the hall, the door has not been locked, you just need more time, you can make it.
You sling yourself barefoot down, almost tumbling from your haste and throw yourself out, skipping the stone steps and then to the wild path, short of breath and fear dictating your decisions, you remember it took you a good twenty minutes to get to the castle, but walking the whole path is out of the question, it would be too obvious and easy, you necessarily have to lengthen the path and consequently put in more time to get away from that terrifying place.
With horror you realize that you don't know where Glenn and Claire might be at all, would he hurt them if he found them?
Of course he would.
You don't know the man, but you have noticed all too well the bestial aura around him; he is someone capable of harm, and he will harm you if you cannot escape him.
Your feet step on scattered branches on the ground and you whimper trying to ignore the pain, another roar - or maybe it's a howl? - rips through the air, mingling with the howls of the rushing wind, and you stifle an anguished cry.
Scratches open along your body, trees ravaged by bad weather and never tended seem to want to block your way in every way possible, and the darkness certainly doesn't help.
Like a wounded animal you limp aimlessly, not imagining the hunger of the ravenous beast that sneers at the scent of your blood.
You feel tired, sluggish at times, your peripheral vision somewhat obscured, an excruciating doubt makes its way into your mind. Could it be that the story of the poisoned dress was true?
But why sell it to you, how could the seller have known that your friends would take you to that castle on Halloween night?
You begin to stagger, a sharp twinge in your head stops you, it is so painful that you collapse on the icy, muddy ground.
You realize you are screwed in every sense of the word when a weight suddenly crushes you to the ground, you scream in terror and wide-eyed, trying to shake it off.
Jimin doesn't think twice about clasping you in his vigorous arms, burying his nose on your neck damp with cold sweat, the accelerated beat of your heart rumbling in his own chest, driving him to moan with need. He presses himself against your soft curves, basking in your feverish warmth despite the stormy, icy night.
“Don't hurt me,” you shake your head with your eyes closed, trying to fight the unusual fatigue to plead with him, "Please, I was wrong, forgive me...I won't come back here again, I swear," the boy snorts against your flustered skin.
He reluctantly lifts himself up to allow you to turn toward him, you find some strength to open your eyelids wide, being invested by his sometimes divine appearance. His eyes, no longer as black as you thought they were, are tinged with an extraordinary shade of gold, he watches you from receptive pupils as you notice the grin on his mouth, a mouth larger than you remembered. There is something strange, not human, about him now. And despite the run he must have made to keep up with you, he doesn't have the slightest hint of fatigue in his breath, he's as fucking fresh as a newly bloomed rose.
“You're dying, little girl,” he hums, shaking some hair off your forehead, you lose a beat at the sight of long claws where once there were short, well-manicured nails.
The claw grazes your skin unhurriedly, you feel it scratch without hurting, you anxiously lick your lips closing your eyes, you are so sleepy that you even willingly accept your fate, Jimin snorts through his nose, almost laughing, before lowering himself onto your jugular.
It would be really easy for him to sink his canines into your flesh and bite your throat to rip it out, but fortunately for you he is not a vampire. All he wants is to sink his cock into your pussy and make you cum repeatedly, but if you died it would be hard to put his plan into action. He wants you alive and receptive.
He licks a long streak of saliva onto your delicate neck, heedless of the dirt that has stuck to your skin, before gently biting you. Your reaction is immediate, you start sobbing like a puppy at the feel of his fangs penetrating your flesh, you cling to his shoulders trying to move him weakly from you, and you kick awkwardly with your legs, legs that are locked in a vice grip by his. That way it is easy to feel something hard and heavy pressing against your belly, you try not to think about it as the man seems inebriated by the taste of your blood flowing straight down his throat.
The bitter taste of the poison is revolting, but fortunately your blood has such sweet notes that it counterbalances that horrendous taste in a balanced way, here, now he just has to lick your wound thoroughly. He collects the last rivulets of your blood with his tongue, before dripping his saliva into the tiny holes created by his sharp canines, little holes that begin to close with light smoke, cauterizing the wound and partly removing the poison toxins from your blood.
With no longer a grip on your throat, your head falls limply back to the ground, you gasp trying to fight off the shock of such an experience.
“Mpf!” his tongue invades your mouth treacherously, the taste of your blood making you squeal on his lips, so unfairly soft and pleasant to the touch. The hot and unusually long muscle pushes into your oral cavity eagerly, saving your life has as if awakened the more primal side of Jimin, one of the seven lords who unleashed hell in Howl's town. And the mating ritual has begun, but you cannot know this.
You break free by gasping for air, “W-why?” you stutter breathlessly, “You don't even know me!” you cry as you drive your nails into his forearms, triggering in return a reaction of possession in him, prompting him to grab your thighs and lift them onto his shoulders to your profound horror, he is so wild as he spreads your legs wide open to sink his face in between them that you can't utter a single breath.
As he runs his tongue along your pulsing, hot folds, Jimin realizes with nastiness that during your escape you got wet for him, he had smelled your arousal as he pursued you, on some people the quickened heartbeat has that effect, but the sweet and slightly salty taste of your juices are now a definitive proof for him. And you can't deny it, you love how he teases you by slowly sliding around your swollen clit, plays with it by holding it between his lips and then releasing it after sucking hard, almost biting it. He tortures it by pricking it quickly with the tip of his tongue and then returns to lapping your thick juices from the soft slit, which seems to melt every time that devilish tongue penetrates it, managing to lick and stimulate walls that a normal tongue could never reach.
You shyly move your pelvis against his face, your thighs stained with your arousal tremble against his cheeks, and a terrible heat makes you pant desperately. The man abandons your slit to push himself again against your unbearably sensitive folds, they are so moist that you can hear the noise they make every time that cursed tongue stimulates them to push a few millimeters toward your clitoris, never reaching to touch it.
“God!” you curse, suddenly reaching out an arm to grab his hair, not recognizing yourself when you desperately push him against your pussy, longing for the pleasure he was spoiling you with at first.
His arousal makes him grunt like a wounded animal as he sinks into your core with languid, sensual movements, rewraps your desperate clit with his lips and tongue before continuing with more direct, zigzagging movements, crushing it at times with the flat part of his tongue and then flicking it with the tip soon after. He would never stop kissing and licking you like that, his tensed cock vibrating each time he eats you up a little more, delightedly swallowing your juices, enjoying retrieving them each time they flow between your wide-open, rosy thighs. A clearer, liquid substance squirts slightly out of your slit, causing you to shake around his head, you clench your lower lip between your teeth with tears sliding down your flushed cheeks, you are instigating Jimin to pleasurably hurt you, and the funniest thing is that you don't even notice.
Finishing licking some of that shiny, transparent substance from your inner thigh, the boy moves up your body, biting slowly at the flesh of your belly and then higher and higher to the softness of your breasts, titillating a turgid nipple before pulling it between his lips.
“W-What are you doing to me?” you gasp, wishing he would never stop adoring and cuddling your body, why? Just moments before you were running from his clutches, why are you lifting your pelvis now, inviting him to take you as if you've been waiting for this all your life?
“Are you just...” he murmurs, before kissing your chin with his devilish lips, "Responding to your desire" he kisses your mouth again, an electric sensation forcing you to comply, chasing his tongue with yours, collapsing to the spicy taste that is now all over his mouth, your taste.
With half-closed eyes you realize that the dark lines of ink are moving, taking the shape of a wolf watching you, you have no way to comprehend the unsettling sensation that invades you. The man, with one hand pressed against your bare back, forces you to turn away without you having any say in the matter, you find yourself with your face to the ground and the wind blowing down your back, shivering under his fiery, golden eyes, your legs trembling from the effort to keep you on your hands and knees, fighting the sweet pain pulsing in your naked pussy.
“Now hold still, little girl,” he murmurs in your ear in a husky voice, sensuously pumping his cock with one hand, swollen veins pushing against his palm, which squeezes along the entire shaft to the base, then back to the thick tip from which he is already dripping his thick cum, "I need to get all the venom out of your pretty little body, am I right?" he sneers, positioning himself at your entrance.
You open your eyes wide, panic stifled by arousal, but it's still there nonetheless, clenching your fingers between the grass and damp earth, rubbing your knees against pebbles that make you moan in pain. The length of his cock begins to push against your slit, forcing it open for him, a choked cry leaves your throat, feeling your walls that, despite their wetness, struggle to let him in.
“You're still so tight,” hisses the man unfamiliar to you, "I must spoil you some more, huh?" he chuckles, sliding his hand between your legs, using his index finger to stimulate your throbbing bud, you gasp arching your back and raising your buttocks toward the man, who takes the opportunity to plunge his cock another inch into your entrance, which throbs and squeezes him rhythmically, almost making him lose control of the situation.
The sensation of the claw grazing your folds each time he presses and massages your swollen clitoris brings you almost to the edge, you feel a wild sexual desire, something you never experienced even during your teenage years, a crucial period of sexual development.
“Go ahead, please!” you exclaim breathlessly, pressing your forehead against the ground, every single millimeter that moves inside you without really penetrating you is like torture, your index finger moving languidly, and you're going fucking crazy.
“Are you really begging?” he teases you, you grit your teeth until it hurts, but finally you give in.
“Please... fill me, take me!”
“Do you want it?” he asks again, pulling the tip almost completely out, the only part he had managed to get in, you clench your legs desperately trying to recover what your intimacy has lost.
“Yes! I want it! I want your cock, I want it to fill me all the way, and I want it now!” you growl with an anger that burns under your skin, looking at him from behind, his face is an emotionless mask, but his eyes...oh, those never lie, you read the fire of desire in them, he's suffering that anticipation as much as you are. Bastard.
“You begged for it so well, little girl... I'll just have to satisfy you,” the cavernous tone clashes with his appearance, but it anticipates what happens next and leaves you breathless, abandoning your contracted clitoris he grips your hips tightly, almost penetrating your delicate flesh with his claws, pushing himself into you with a vigorous thrust, instantly breaking the thin membrane at your entrance, effortlessly. The burning that follows makes your eyes water, your body instinctively trying to escape the man's savage assault, suddenly realizing that you have lost your virginity that way, out in the open, sweaty and dirty, just like an animal.
The man on top of you hisses and makes strange deep sounds, inebriated by the sensation of his throbbing cock finally and completely squeezed between your trembling walls, trying to adjust to the abnormal size. You gasp whimpering, moving your pelvis trying to disentangle yourself from the overgrip, his claws are hurting you, but he doesn't seem to want to let go, not now that he is buried so deep.
With a grunt he thrusts out slightly, watching as your pussy instinctively clings to him, as your thick juices and virginal blood wet his entire length, lubricating him. Leaning toward you, he lets a long trickle of saliva fall back between your buttocks, slipping between them reaches the point where you are joined. He thrusts back into you forcefully, striking deeper and deeper, and you feel every detail of his cock penetrating you and thrusting higher and higher, touching points so delicate and sensitive that you howl meekly, like a she-wolf offering her whole self to her mate, the pain has been replaced by the need to be possessed, you move against his pubes with urgency, the thread of pleasure is getting thinner and thinner, you feel incredibly wet, practically soaked, and the sounds of your union are so obscene that you are shamefully aroused. Your walls flutter drunkenly with pleasure, at one point with the thick, red tip he manages to hit the entrance to your cervix with precision, you stiffen whimpering breathlessly, and Jimin collapses on top of you, continuing to move his hips tirelessly and with spellbinding sinuosity.
You take it so well that it is impossible for him not to want to have you again and again, throwing back his head to be hit by the moonlight that increases his desire, his pupils widen and he feels his testicles clench with urgency as the base of his cock swells, making him shake all over. Without a second thought, he begins to enter you with deeper and longer thrusts so that his whole cock sinks into you without any more constriction, he hears you panting and crying and this only causes him joy, you are completely abandoned to him and your sensations.
You're about to come, you're not so ignorant that you don't know what's happening to your body, you've even heard of intense orgasms, but this... god, this is going to be devastating, you know very well. It's nothing like the ones you had with masturbation, this one is deeper, snaking through your lower belly and you feel it in your uterus. You stiffen all over, trying to block the erection that keeps pinning you down between hard, sensual thrusts, every time it touches your cervix you risk going crazy.
“Don't stop me, little girl... It's here, isn't it?” he gasps at you, slamming into you once more, high up between the entrance of your uterus and another sensitive area that makes your clitoris and walls tear with intense pleasure, your toes curl and you can't help but nod desperately, "Alright, love," he replies without even realizing it, kissing your bare, sweaty shoulder, his knot is almost complete, but he wants you to come before he gives you his cum.
He teases a sensitive, turgid nipple with the tip of a claw as he reaches the point of your union, massaging your folds to help you come, though with a hint of naughtiness he doesn't dare touch your clitoris, he wants you to orgasm on your own, knowing that the intensity then will be greater and you will collapse weak and distraught in his arms.
“Oh, fuck-!” you widen your eyes, being hit by a pressing and beautiful sensation of jouissance, sucking him furiously into you amid tremors and searing waves of pleasure, the same clear liquid as before leaks from your slit, this time in a greater quantity, causing Jimin to grunt as he is run over by your jet, slamming into you almost brutally, streams of his cum fiercely fill your core, as if to mark you for life, and finally his knot swells completely, locking him inside you.
Although immobilized, he cannot stop coming, his testicles quivering violently, and only one thing could quell his aching desire. With his eyes now almost completely encompassed by the black pupil, he pushes your hair away from your neck, exposing your previously tortured skin.
“Why does this go on?” you ask feverishly, confused by the enormous weight widening your walls and locking his big cock into you.
“Sssh” he rubs the tip of his nose against you, making you shudder, "Just wait a little longer" his words are followed by an excruciating twinge, his grown canines penetrating like blades into your skin and sinking into your flesh amidst your shocked and submissive screams, your body surrendering to his force, instinctively submitting and waiting for him to finish marking.
Jimin loves blood, your blood, it pleasantly bathes his tongue with its density and sweetness, he moans with need as he loses himself in your scent, instinct commands him to move his hips once more, even though you are both locked together, with a weak moan you take in the last strings of his cum, resting possessively in your belly, you feel heavy and unbearably full, but at least he seems to be finished, you feel him relax as he once again licks the holes left by his teeth, healing them. He looks like a wolf cleaning up after his mate after mating.
“What are you?” you ask wearily, by now surrendering to the idea that the man cannot be a mere human, that probably everything he has told you, from the poison-soaked dress to the deal with the town, is real.
“Jimin” you hear him grunt at such a low frequency that if you hadn't been alone, you probably wouldn't have heard him. You snort weakly.
“I asked you what you are, not your name,” you murmur, the strange, heavy weight preventing you from moving, hissing as Jimin moves awkwardly between your legs, putting you in a more comfortable situation, letting you rest against his chest lethargically, occasionally kissing the back of your neck and licking your neck, or behind your ear.
You'd be lying if you said you didn't like all that attention; you feel a delicious bite around your heart as you cling to his embrace, protected from the evening chill.
You don't know exactly how long you spend like this, maybe forty minutes, maybe an hour, the fact is that finally that thing between your legs seems to melt away, making you sigh almost strangely.
Jimin gently untangles himself from you, leaving your warm shelter slowly and with a feeling of emptiness that stuns you, your legs finally relax and you try to move them to regain some mobility, you feel his cum pushing to come out and two of his fingers enter you, plugging your entrance. No claws, you notice as he slowly turns you around.
You hiss at the burning, your knees are completely ruined, but Jimin begins to sprinkle them with kisses and saliva, the man is back between your thighs again, you can see his long, wild hair shining as he licks and sucks your skin from time to time, all the way to his fingers, he moves them slowly inside you and you twitch involuntarily, closing your eyes at the warmth of his tongue licking a thick streak of cum and juices dripping roughly from you, pushing it down to your hypersensitive clitoris and you moaning in pain.
“Don't do it,” you gasp, closing your legs tightly, but he doesn't give up, grabbing your chin between two fingers and forcing your mouth wide open, your heart faltering with a strange emotion, you let him spit all his creamy load into your mouth, running along your tongue with a surprised cry.
“Swallow,” he orders with a gleam of interest in his eyes.
You do as he tells you, wanting to please him in every way possible, accepting him back into your mouth for a slow, intimate kiss. It is also dominant and sweet, intense.
“I'm Jimin, a werewolf and also one of the masters of the castle,” he explains pushing you against his bare chest, you hug him back as if it were the most natural thing in the world to be there, clasped to him on a bed of dry leaves, "You are my mate, it's no accident that you were chosen ... being a virgin at your age is unusual for humans, but not for us wolves, you waited for me," he emphasizes with fire in his eyes.
“But ... my friends?” you can't help but ask, which makes him chuckle.
“My people have learned to be among humans, they recognized you by scent and led you to me at the right time, they are fine,” he informs you with a caress, “In fact, you should worry about yourself,” he says with a note of reproach.
“H-How?” fear advances again.
“I've waited too many years for your birth, little girl... it's time to repay the wait,” he hums as something hot and hard returns against your belly.
“Jimin, wai-!” too late, the tip of his cock captures your entrance again, this time with more ease and the next thrust has you writhing against him with tears in your eyes, “Oh, shit!”
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© 𝐀𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐚𝐌𝐚𝐥𝐟𝐨𝐲𝐙𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐧𝐢 -  𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝. || 𝐔𝐧𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐳𝐞𝐝 𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝/𝐨𝐫 𝐝𝐮𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐡𝐢𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐝.
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hollyhomburg · 1 month ago
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Before I Leave You (Pt.76)
Summary: Your Pre-heat fever builds and builds and builds until it breaks.
Tags: forced caretaking, Preheat, scenting, nesting, mindless fluff, hurt/comfort, omega/omega content, possessive behavior, omegaspace, lactation kink, Jin's hormones briefly convince him that the m/c is his actual pup, breeding kink, pregnancy kink, tummy worship?, nipple play, manhandling, heavy petting, fingering, exhibitionism, jk gets a little pussy obsessed, slight jk focus, slick marking, a tiny bit of ass play, slight painplay, implied/foreshadowed womb fucking, hole check, gentle spanking, dom! namjoon, d/s,
W/c: 12.3k
A/n: so it's once again birthday pup time for me! i'm going to be turning twenty eight! i can't believe it's my birthday already! as with my usual birthday tradition- i have made a little amazon wish list. it's been three years since I first did this and my room is littered with the little things you guys have gotten me over the years. I still sleep under the big duvet you guys got me and it's my favorite thing <3 the love you guys give me during my birthday always leaves me feeling warm for months.
Previous part - Masterlist - First part
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Jungkook’s whole face is parked between your thighs, sweaty cheeks, chiseled jaw resting uncomfortably against your hip bones, Curling locks and all.
That’s the first thing that alerts you to the pack's predicament when you begin to wake up the next morning in the heat nest. There are raised voices nearby. Someone is upset, not angry. But upset.
A wide back rumbles behind you, and the uneasy scents dissipate.
All of your stuffed animals are piled around you, your jellycats and the special extra soft ones that Jimin and Tae got you. You can distantly remember reaching for them sometime during the early morning and whining. Yoongi’s voice pitched low and sweet.
“This one little lovely? How about this one?” a finger rubs against your cheek, running through your peach fuzz accompanied by a quiet hum of approval. “My broody little omega, just wanna keep all your small and cute things safe huh? So soft and little. Just wanna show the alphas that you can take care of small things in your nest, right?”
You remember whining and nuzzling, trying to tell him without words (words are so so hard in omegaspace) that you didn’t really care about showing the icky alphas resting too close in the hallway. All you care about is showing him.
Now as you wake, things are less simple. There are tense voices and scents all around you. A tangle of them no longer sour but still alpha. Jin has not let them into the nest yet but you're starting to need them- starting to think that even if they are icky you might as well just…be close to them. Something small and furry and desperate claws for them in your chest. For Namjoonie, Hobi, Jiminie, and Tae Tae Tae- in your chest. A need that had been quiet yesterday but is loud today.
The need for her rises up now like a rabid animal. Tae Tae Tae. All in your head. At least you think it might be all in your head- you can feel your mouth moving and someone coming close. A silky pant leg brushes your thigh as she starts to move only to get held back.
"You shouldn't- Tae- Jin will get mad."
Your instincts quiet at the sound of them and you begin to wake. You're not in heat yet. Not yet, but the fever is building. A slow drip starting to spill out around the edges. The surface tension in your being trembling and twitching. Burning through you and turning your mind crumbly and hazy at the edges.
“How’s her temperature?” You hear a distant voice ask. Joonie alpha. Your mind identifies.
You feel a wide familiar palm against your forehead. Your throat. “Still a little cold- thank you Jinnie- what a good omega keeping our pup warm.” More fluffy blankets get dumped on top of you and you feel like you’re buried beneath layers and layers of clouds. The shimmering delight on the edge of your instincts. a high keening sound and a low alpha growl.
They don't smell quite so rancid as they did yesterday but they still smell sour. You have a sinking feeling it has nothing to do with their pheromones or hormones and more to do with the moment. What they’re discussing.
But what could they ever possibly have to be afraid of? Your alphas are awfully strong and protective of you. In a nest so lovely and so soft there is nothing that could possibly hurt you. Jinnie made it so well you're half convinced it could keep monsters out.
You feel a hiss building in your throat at the idea of a particular monster. Distant in your memories but never far for long. The ickiest of alphas. Never. You rub your face harder into the object to your left. A sensation- a finger trails down your scent gland, touching where it aches. Nudging a whine from your throat.
But there is nothing at all bad here…Besides Kookie.
He's so sweaty and sticky that it's a little bit gross. It wouldn't be a problem if he wasn't laying all of his body weight into you and pressing his face anywhere your skin is bare. He clings, his hands sliding under your behind and hips to hold you close, face pressed to a spot that makes you shiver from the intensity, the sensitiveness, that every breath makes against your barely covered tummy.
Jungkook noses first into your navel and then lower. Little breaths of air and his chin tickling where you’re most sensitive. The scent of slick is cloying on the air, you have no idea if it’s his or yours or Jin’s.  
Huh, That's a little strange.
Jungkook's not usually so clingy with you in the morning. Usually, he reserves this particular trend of endless nuzzling for the alphas. He's holding you so tight that you couldn't even squirm away if you wanted to, rubbing his cheek over and over again along your thighs, your stomach, your pussy.
He rubs his cheek along the space between your thigh and hip and purrs. Loud and rumbly, vibrating against your front. You reach down sleepy, brushing his hair away from his face. You wish the alphas would let him sleep- but the sound of tense voices is making you feel sensitive and whiney.
"I can smell it hyung, don't tell me you can't- and look at the way he's-”
Jungkook turns and snaps his teeth at them and they fall silent. You lift up your head a little.
Jin's perched on the edge of the nest half in Namjoon’s lap. The pack alpha leans against the doorway as Jin dozes against his throat. Tae mirrors them on the other side of the pocket French doors. Wrapped in a duvet from one of the decoy nests and clutching a steaming cup of coffee.
A glass jug of electrolyte mix sits between them and a few cups of coffee leave rings on the floor. Colorful plastic cups stacked nearby. Steam rising in sweet ribbons. Hobi stands there in the doorway, stretches, and yawns. Revealing inches of toned tummy that your eyes fixate on.  Distantly you remember, "one sip of caffine isn't going to hurt Jinnie, Namjoon."
"Sorry pups- we didn't mean to wake you-" Tae is in bright red pj's, the kind patterned with small dark flowers, silky and impenetrable. You want them in the nest the second you see them. But- but-
You look down, and Jungkook's cheeks are just as red. Flushed and sweaty. His hips cocked at a weird angle; one leg hitched up in a position that looks wrong. He looks like he’s uncomfortable.
“Koo?” You ask, but he just lets out a small chirp. “What? Why are you-”
A hand in your hair makes you look up. Jimin is standing there, pursing his lips, looking down at you conflicted. Light streams in through a crack in the gauzy curtains, cutting across his waist, the spot where his shirt rides up on his hips revealing inches of honey skin and the line of his hipbones.
Your blunt omega teeth feel precariously sharp in your mouth. Two parts wanting and one part terror. Jimin, alpha, alpha in the nest. Alpha in the heat nest, alpha alpha alpha.
Jimin knows your terror, letting his shoulders slump and his scent spill out- unthreatening. Your panic eases away. “I was just fixing the curtains. They were making Jinnie uneasy.” The pack omega says nothing, settling up on Namjoon’s shoulder, looking like he’s falling asleep too. A strip of pale blue spring sky is visible only through the very top of the curtains.
“Minnie? What’s wrong with Koo? Why is he?” Jimin’s small smile falters, and you can tell he doesn’t want to say it. Whatever it is that the alphas were talking about.
Behind you, a warm chest moves, it's Yoongi. Soft and firm against your back. His chest expanding buffers you like gentle waves during a summer storm, gentle and lulling. It’s very hard to stay awake. So warm and so cuddled.
But Jungkook…
Your mate's voice is low in your ears, but his hand joins yours in pushing Jungkook's hair away from his sweaty face. Pinching his cheeks until Jungkook's tongue lolls out, licking Yoongi's fingers. It's lewd and it's hungry. You squirm back against Yoongi and at the smell of your slick.
So close to Jungkook's face, that you can't avoid it being scented on the air. A lax grin stretches Jungkook’s face, eyelashes fluttering, his smile dopey and out of it.
Yoongi's voice is rough from disuse, making your stomach swoop. Jungkook pushes against Yoongi's touch trying to get back to your stomach back between your legs. Chirping and trilling his displeasure. Trying to burrow and nuzzle through Yoongi’s hands unsuccessfully.
“Koo was feeling a little left out.”
“No,” you whisper, your stomach dropping for a whole other reason. Surprise making you lucid. “Really?”
Jungkook blinks, pouting. A little dazed. “I fucking hate cramps. Hyung- let go-” Yoongi lets Jungkook’s face go and he plants himself right back between your thighs. Nuzzling and shuffling until you let him closer. His face lowers to get closer to where you’re most sensitive. You try and stop him but Jungkook growls and you quiet.
The alpha’s watch as Jungkook nuzzles between your legs, nothing more than a thin layer of fabric to keep the smell of slick and all of where you’re most sensitive from Jungkook. Cheek squished against your pussy, soft breaths tickling your inner thigh. Jungkook settles and huffs.
Jimin runs a finger down your cheek but you hardly notice, still looking down at Jungkook, an upset pout already forming on your face.
"Oh," you're almost teary-eyed with it. You can't imagine Jungkook feeling as sensitive, as scared, as needy as you feel. It's upsetting, the fact that your nestmate is feeling so- so…and you can't- that he’s going into heat and you’re not-
You understand why Jin got upset yesterday. Having nestmates is different than having alphas or mates. There is a special corner of your instincts dedicated to taking care of them that hates this; all going into heat at the same time.
A smaller more wicked voice whispers other things, facts you dare not voice;
If alpha knocks you all up at once then you can all be pretty and round in the nest together. You can get all sweet with milk at the same time as Jungkook and Jin. It would be so easy- being pupped with Jungkook and Jin. Your sensitive sensitive tummy feels so unsafe, like this, Jungkook sleepily pulling up your shirt so that all of the alpha’s can see.
You shouldn’t be like this- you should both be belly down in the nest, you need to hide it from the alpha’s and leave it just for your nestmates to touch. Guarding you- that's what jungkook is doing. keeping your tummy safe from the alpha's until he deems you ready to be bred by them.
You want it. All of you safe and round and full, claimed by your alpha's in a way that sticks. You should stay close to him- make sure that alpha breeds him proper. All of them should breed Jungkook at least once just to make sure it takes.
Yoongi sets a hand over your stomach, and Jungkook tries to nip at it, to keep him away. Yoongi just pushes at his nose, a little playful. Jungkook grins, panting through his teeth. "Calm down pup, it's okay, Jungkook's gonna be fine. all three of your heats is nothing we can't handle."
Behind you, Tae snorts. hobi pinches her arm in repremand and she swats his hand away.
You nod wetly, but it’s hard to quiet your sniffles. Jimin leaves the nest, carefully stepping over the border so that he doesn't mess it up. Hoseok grabs his arm to steady him. Mindful of Jin’s boundaries that get momentarily tread over as Namjoon picks him up, helping with the aid of Tae and Jimin, to get Jinnie back into the nest.
With all of them looming over you, you feel incredibly small. looking and watching hungrily as they gently puppet the pack omega and lie him down. kind of on top of your plushie pile- but you don't mind- that's why you made it anyways. Jin sleepilly starts to tug them close, the soft and small things clutched to his chest.
The alpha's linger above you. looking down and watching. their feet depressing the nest where they stand.
Jungkook sighs against your thigh. "S'okay, at least now it's all of us together."
Omegaspace isn’t something you’ve seen on Jungkook as frequently as you would have liked. But there’s a childish pout to his lips. Cute, that you want to kiss at. Want to nibble. "Alphas don't even need to help- just Jinnie and me and Yoomi."
That gets a laugh out of the rest of them, Yoomi is a new nickname for your mate that leaves him smiling a little. You look up at him, eyes drooping and struggling to stay awake. You happen to agree but words are hard so you just settle for purring. Behind Jimin, you can see Hobi watching, smiling.
Jimin leans around the doorway and raises his eyebrow at Jungkook, as far as he dares to go into the nest room without permission. "You'll be begging for my knot later for that pup."
Jungkook huffs, "Won't, promise, not gonna ask for an icky-smelling alpha."
Jimin cocks head, "Is that so? Then maybe I should only knot Jinnie and her if you're so sure you won't need it."
Jungkook seems to second guess himself, "hyung wait- you can knot me just not-"
"I'm just teasing."
Jungkook huffs, nuzzling back between your legs, "meanie"
It feels strange, not necessarily sexual- having Jungkook's face pressed between your legs. There's a zing of pleasure at the touch, sure, but Yoongi holds your hips and keeps you still so that Jungkook can get comfortable. Holding you stationary so that you won't move against the feeling of his nose nuzzling over your underwear.
His low voice is husky in your ear as he whispers, “That’s it pup, let Jungkookie and then you can- there you go. No- No rubbing. Be a good pup and settle.”
You feel yourself clench weakly and when you open your eyes, Namjoon is watching you from the doorway. Eyes dark and scent unrepentantly sweet and musky. You don’t mind him watching. The sight of all of his omegas in a heat nest is one that he’s allowed to indulge in. Tae too- wraps around his arm with her head resting on his shoulder.
Every minute the alpha’s are allowed closer, last night they weren’t allowed in the doorway, now, one at a time in the nest. It’s only a matter of time before all bets are off and they’re all allowed here.  
Jungkook settles once he finds the right spot on your plush thigh. His warm breath easing away the remaining ache in your core. The cramps are better now but not entirely gone yet. Your body preparing itself for your alpha's, making room for their cocks and their knots.
You wonder if you'll be able to take Namjoon's unprepped. You're almost dizzy with the thought of it. You wonder what it's going to feel like- having him fuck you through your heat along with Jungkook and Jin. Namjoon's knot would be the best- the exact things your cramps need. Soon the cramping will fade and the need to be filled will take its place, you can already feel it a little.
Namjoon watches Jungkook nuzzle, you part your thighs further to show and-
Yoongi's teeth bite into the back of your neck, the same second Jungkook’s clamp on your inner thigh, not hard- just enough for you to feel it.
Yoongi's words swallow your whine. "Calm pup- not yet- not until the pack omega says you can." Not until I say you can.
Even having the alphas a little too close could trigger your heat too soon. They're doing their best, trying to stay away. With Jin and Jungkook the risk of triggering a heat isn't quite so scary. But with you, it’s a little unpredictable. The last thing they want to do is have it come too quick.
Jungkook is a good omega. He won't let any alphas come close until Jin says so. Literally guarding your stomach and womb from a knot. It's a little cute, even if it is a little lewd. He grumbles out something unintelligible before he huffs one final time and goes back to sleep. Shuffling his hips, a little, legs splaying like he's trying to alleviate the ache there a little.
There is some murmuring, the rest of them talking over each other while you look down at Jungkook and comb through his hair, Yoongi's fingers dancing across his jaw, hovering on his lower lip, and Jungkook returns to nuzzling into your stomach.
“Three omegas in heat- how are we going to do this?”
Tae's hand grips Jimin's, squeezing hard as they stand in the nest. Namjoon fluffs a blanket over Jin's back. the pack omega's hands deftly tangling with a stuffed bunny you have. ordinarily- jin would never cuddle with your stuffed animals like this- but it fills you with a sense of soft chagrined. The pack omega can want these things, can like these things, nesting doesn't always have to be about protecting- it can just feel nice too.
It doesn't have to be scary, it's feeling less scary already. you don't mind that the alpha's are here, standing around you three and yoongi.
“We’ll manage, same way we always do.” She turns, hair fluffing, she's taken it out of her rollers already and it falls in soft waves. She looks soft, looks like she belongs in the nest. You're glad she's here. You crane your neck and Tae notices, stooping slightly to touch your cheek.
"Mommy alpha? Please?" you start, and behind you, Yoongi mutters a curse.
Tae says nothing, a gentle smile spreading her cheeks, touch your cheek. They're doing alot of that- you wonder why? Your cheeks feel awfully pink and feverish, sensitive there.
The alphas are starting to smell nicer, very very nice, not sweet and cloying like Jin and Jungkook- but musky and tempting. You nuzzle into Tae’s wrist, nose searching for more of the scent. Her fingers itch towards the back of your neck. A scruff would make you so pliant and docile- and she wants to hear you squeak and purr more- like last night.
But Jungkook sits up, eyes beady, snapping his teeth. His hiss loud, "Mine" he's crouched low, prepared to pounce, mouth cleaved open in a snarl- guarding the nest and you. Tae's eyes go wide and Namjoon grabs her around her wrist.
"Kookie-" Namjoon tries to start, but Jungkook just hisses again.
You feel like you're further along than Jungkook is in your pre-heat, the restlessness in you quieted to a tired hum. You comb your hands through his hair as the alpha's make themselves scarce. Tae sends you a long look over her shoulder, mouthing "Sorry pup."
Beside you. Jin sleeps on, a big big big stuffed animal of yours that you might have scented in a daze half asleep (sleep nesting- similar to sleepwalking) pinned under his body. Jin stays asleep unaware of the snapping and light squabbles. Chest rising and falling underneath a cut of sunlight.
The alphas take it in stride, giving Jungkook space. You doze in between minutes, turning sideways to tuck your face into Yoongi's throat and hide from the sunlight. The springtime sunshine streams through the window all yellow and golden. You listen to the distant thunder of your alpha's speaking. Yoongi shuffles out from under and behind you and whispers softly that he'll be back in a minute. You only grumble quietly, and listen to his conversation with the others in the hall.
The soft smacking sound of kisses. "Sorry did we-"
Jungkook nuzzles into your stomach. Distracting you from the conversation in the hall. "No, just need coffee,"
You close your eyes and breathe and when you open your them you can watch the dustmotes swirl above you. Catching the light.
"Thank you- I'm sorry we didn't-" Jimin cuts himself off.
"It's find- Koo just-" Yoongi makes a disconcerting noise. Not a trill but a question without an answer. "You okay?"
If Jimin answers, you can't see it. The world slipping away under the guise of sleep.
"Koo's is hitting quick." that sentence gets no answer. No acknowledgment.
They’re unsure when exactly it will hit either by tonight or tomorrow morning if you’re lucky. You don’t need to ask what the alphas did last night, but as you listen to them in the hall- rolling up some blankets (a decoy nest sacrificed for a sleeping spot.)
You gather that either one or all of them slept outside of the door last night, guarding the door and keeping you safe from any potential intruders. The only people who are allowed to freely come and go is of course- Noodle and Yoongi.
You must nod off at one point, because the next time you wake Jungkook has pulled himself up a little, head resting just below your ribs and Jin is lifting his head up out from under your stuffed animal pile. Sighing sleepily he scents Jungkook’s preheat on the air, dragging himself close to rub a soothing hand down Jungkook’s back. Looking down at the other omega and biting his lips.
At the pack omega's closeness, jungkook's arms tighten around your waist. “They’re not going to hurt us Koo, you can let go.” Jungkook's arms only tighten around your waist further in answer.
“Can’t! Something bad is gonna happen if I let go!” Jin sighs, and you try and tell him with your eyes that it’s fine- that Jungkook can stay right here like this if it helps him, you really don’t mind. 
He leans over you, pressing his nose to your scent gland but you make a noise and pull away. “Your face is scratchy.”
Jin sits back on his heels, rubbing at his face almost angry, frustrated “God damn it.”
“Come on hyung you love my heats-”
Jin scoffs, “Yeah but you-“ he seems to get ahold of himself. He pulls himself over to your and Jungkook’s quiet cuddle. Your legs, Jungkook's, Jin's. You don't know why you're still so tired, even after sleeping the whole night and most of the morning away, exhaustion pulls you down like a lead weight.
The next time you come to your mate's hands pet through your hair and ask if any of you need anything. Yoongi feeds you sips of that electrolyte mix, rubbing across your jaw to get you to swallow down all of it. Clumsy with sleep, a bit of it dripping down your chin that Jungkook eagerly licks at. Lapping at the salt from your lips when you're done in reward.
But the three of you doze, three sleepy omega’s in a nest with little care to the world of the clattering outside in the kitchen and the smell of cooking food. Bread maybe? Pancakes?
Something sweet and syrupy eventually gets pressed against your lips, a strong arm around your waist, a soft croon- one of your alpha’s but it’s hard to tell who that says, “Open up- good puppy.”
Yoongi practices his massage on Jungkook- pushing aches out of all of you with his thumbs and his laughter. You and Jin share the heating pad after breakfast. Pressed first over Jin’s lap and then yours as you press closer and closer until your stomach is pressed up against Jin’s.
Nesting with them is sort of your favorite thing. You don't even mind that the alpha's have joined you in the nest during breakfast. They're still careful and they're still mindful. But it doesn't feel so scary- having them close.
To be pressed belly to belly with your pack omega makes you feel so small your eyelids droop further. Hands loosely tangled with Jin's shirt, his tank top too- one like Hobi's.
Hobi who gets up after breakfast, hair fluffed from a thorough scenting. Jungkook is really good at scenting, knows just how to rub his cheek into the alpha’s until they’re blushing and smelling musky. He’s very intent and particular with it and squirms closer and closer to them until Namjoon detangles him and tells him off.
Hobi sees a break in it and leaves the nest, something you're not allowed to do. Every time you even think to shift away from Jin, he tugs you closer.
“Pup, my pup,” Jin’s going in and out of lucidity, and he cradles you to his chest, eyes dark pools, pupils completely dilated. Hands grasping at your waist, your back, the back of your neck urging you lower, not too low- not in that way.
Jin stops around his heart, tugging you to his chest. Whining. “Pup too tiny, pup needs- I need-”
He holds you there, hand around the back of your neck. Your lips smushed against his skin. Your face pressed to his chest so close you can feel every thump of his heartbeat. You don't understand what Jin is trying to get you to do, at least not immediately.
Yoongi is there, it’s a good thing that he’s there. he takes Jin’s hands away from you and squeezes them. You blink blearily- unaware of just what Jin hints at, his whines of distress and near chirps that Yoongi shushes.
“Jinnie, baby- she is not actually your pup, you’re not-“ He sounds stressed. You want to tell him that you don’t mind but your words are hard to summon. Jin smells so good, his milky cream omega scent impossibly bright against your nose, almost citrussy.
“You don’t have milk sweet thing.”
You know that the instincts to protect and provide for pup and packmate get a little crossed in heats and ruts- but you never imagined that Jin would want to. Your toes curl, and full-body shivers erupt on your skin. Your eyes shoot open, immediately making eye contact with Yoongi- who looks stricken with something that looks an awful lot like arousal. Jin's chest heaves beneath you and he starts to tear up. Lower lip wobbling.
The heat beneath your skin bubbles up to meet him, and soon you'll melt away into nothing but sticky goey omega- you're sure of it. The embarrassment you feel at his urging is only quieted by the comfort you find in his touch, the way he holds you steady and tight. Almost captive. The idea of Jin- of your pack omega- doing that is-
Jin's big eyes are filling with tears, you have no doubt he’d be stomping his feet if he was standing if Yoongi wasn’t gently whipping those same tears away. Is this omegaspace? Is this what Jinnie looks like when he falls soft and sweet just as you do?
You have to help, you have to make him stop crying, filling the air with a rancid scent that's so different from his usual scent that it makes you want to cry too.
You nuzzle closer to his throat, where he's still sweet sweet milky. Lying your weight on his chest, he hisses at the sensitivity of having his nipples brush your shirt and you whimper too. Equally as sensitive there. Your hormones spiking wildly.
But you follow your instincts and the animal lurking beneath your skin that tells you to get your mouth on your pack omega and suck. Suckling on Jinnie’s scent gland, squishy and swollen under your teeth. Worrying away at it between your teeth.
That seems to settle him a bit, he goes lax under you almost instantly, sighing, coming up to cup the back of your head, urging you closer until you go dizzy with it. "Good omega- good little pup." Yoongi wipes a little saliva from your cheek, and your eyelashes flutter.
"The alphas- the alphas next- have to make sure everyone is taken care of- have to s'my pack, my pups." Jinnie babbles.
You wait until he settles and falls back asleep before you stop sucking at his skin and sit up. A little hazy at the edges. Pulling away. You've left several small red marks in your wake.
You’re starting to feel a little restless. Yesterday you’d thought that you could spend the rest of the month asleep and now? Now you fidget. Every time you try and leave the nest the alphas are there, corralling you back to it but you can’t help it. You want to look closer at Jin’s decoy nests in the hall, and the kitchen. You want to hunt down Noodle and maybe brush him a little. Brush him and give him treats and keep him closer and-
You hear the others smile when you say that, babbling mindlessly about this and that. And you know that it’s just your omegan nesting instincts, they’re the same instincts that you feel when you braid Jungkook’s hair, Tae’s too- perched on the edge of the nest. Keeping it away from their faces. Pressing your body along Tae’s side, hands guided by Jungkook, the three of you eat more breakfast to bulk up for the heat, for when you'll want little else but to fuck and be fucked.
But when your bellies are well and truly full, you roughhouse and play as pups do.
Jungkook pushes you down as you tease him by biting into his watermelon before he has a chance to steal the best bite, and he leans low to nip, imitating an alpha growl. It’s a way you’ve play wrestled before, an imitation of the way that Hobi and Jimin and Namjoon fight.
Only sometimes with Tae, less since she’s transitioned and she's deemed herself too delicate for alpha wrestling. You happen to agree.
She doesn't feel delicate when she drags you back by your hips, ignoring the way that they splay almost curious, when she lands a swat over your behind. Not that Jungkook gets any better treatment. Sides drawn over Namjoon's lap, giggling and squirming as half a dozen swats are dispensed over his behind. Just as zoomy as you are. Zoomy but sleepy.
The alphas are keeping an eye out for any sexual contact. “You’ll make it come too quick Koo- for both of you” Namjoon picks up Jungkook and put him back in the nest, away from you and not in the hall. Pouting up at your alpha.
"But hyung- we need to do something other than nap."
"Fine, you can go to the kitchen," Jungkook had perked up at that, "but not a walk Koo, I'm serious, if you were to go for a run right now, I'm not sure all of us could hold Jiminie back."
instincts chaff in strange ways. things that never would ordinarily irritate your alphas turn into grand offenses. like Clanging from the kitchen that comes with a loud shout and puttering feet. as if on queue jimin shouts from a room over.
"The mailman! The fucking mailman just put stuff in our mailbox! I should- I could-"
Tae leans out the door to shout down the hallway. Far away you hear noodle hiss- somewhat agreeing with Jimin’s frustrations.
"Jiminie- calm down, he's just doing his job, he's not here for our omega's."
Our omega's. You like the sound of that. You like the way Tae says it. 'Ours' has a nice ring to it. Relinquished briefly from your exhaustion and with permission- You and Jungkook are free from the nest- enough movement to sate your zoomies.
But not before a bath.
The alphas corral you one by one. You first, Jin second, and Jungkook last into the bathroom upstairs.
You're carried by Jimin and placed there (he almost drops you on the stairs because of how you nuzzle into his throat, his sensitive spot between his collar bones, and the skin over his pulse point is so tempting you can't resist a little nibble.) Tae follows close behind, watching the way your eyebrows pull together, peaking over Jimin's shoulder, teeth buried in his collar bones, and laugh. "Is Minnie yummy baby?"
You just bite down harder, and Jimin curses. His hands and arms remain firm and wrapped around you. Jimin would never drop you.
Huh, you should exploit that.
The shower is unexpectedly docile. Your wandering hands kept from wandering anywhere fun by Jimin's touch around your wrists. he holds you still no matter how much you whine and try to pull them out of his hands. You want to touch but they won't let you.
You try to peer at their knots but Tae picks up your chin and makes you look at just Jimin. You blink water out of your eyes. Jimin puts both your hands in one of his fists and then pushes his wet hair back from his face.
"If you look at us like that pup- what happens next won't be good. We have to make your heat come gentle."
"Gentle" you parrot weakly. Dazed. Shivering beneath the warm spray.
You whine and fight, but Jimin knows- senses you're doing it not to get away but because you like being held, like being manhandled and told what to do. You like the physical reminder that you’re not in control. It's like the play fighting- an imitation of something instinctual.
You squirm until you give in. Tae asks you to move and you move without thinking. Tae asks you to lift your arms and you lift your arms. Every “good pup” makes your brain hazy and your skin hum. Their pheromones are so thick in the air that you swear you can see them swirl. So close and confined to your alpha's your brain falls into a fugue state, almost trancelike.
Tae soaps up your body, cleaning you efficiently, trying not to linger, but it's hard when you keen at every touch, especially your chest, jolting in sensitivity. "I'm sorry pup- oh you're achy here? Mommy promises to kiss them better later." You like the idea of that. You curl close in Jimin's arms while Tae washes your hair. Hissing at every faint brush to your chest.
Places on you are sensitive that never were sensitive before. Your lower back, your chest, your throat. Tae drags the soap into circles and it feels like you spiral down and down. You know you'll be able to scrape together your brain later, but every time you go down into omegaspace it gets a little bit harder to come up for air. Your tether on your lucidity is flimsy at best. As effervescent as soap bubbles.
Jimin gives you light kisses for every order that you follow. his grip on your wrists slowly loostens until he's drawing your arms around his neck and holding you under your behind. "can't have you slipping pup." he says, voice low.
Jimin like you, has trouble speaking through his instincts. but when you open your eyes, he's watching you, keeping you steady and still for tae's touch.
and touch she does, indulging in it. soapy fingers dip low and scrub, inefficent but slow. a soft pleasure that warms you from the inside out, your stays perfectly relaxed. even as you mewl softly. jerking when tae uses the detachable showerhead to wash away the soap suds.
It feels sort of good- getting to scent and talk to and see Tae and Minnie one-on-one like this. Even if seeing them is more like falling asleep under the spray and talking to them is more like whining for your mommy until she gives you stupid chaste kisses to your cheek or forehead.
You tell her they're stupid kisses if they're not on your lips, and she rewards you with a raised eyebrow.
Omegaspace is deceptively hard to get out of, so you stop trying.
Eventually, the water stops falling around you and they help you out, drying off your body with your eyes closed. Arms loosely wound around Jimin’s neck. Tae pinches your cheeks, and you open your eyes before you open your mouth.
You feel like you're hearing everything through water. Yoongi is there and so is Namjoon, watching you with dark eyes, neither afraid nor hungry. tae says something that slips in one ear and out the other. Yoongi holds clothes for you. Just a single shirt, no pants or underwear.
Your body is too sensitive, and won't take or tolerate any more clothes than that- and only if it's his. It will get worse when you're in heat and your body won't be able to take anything touching it but the softest pillows.
Tae pinches your cheeks open gently. There is an orange bottle sitting there on the counter gathering condensation. Dark ink on the side reads 'for emergency uses only.'
You make eye contact with him as Namjoon puts the pill on your tongue.
Feeds you a bit of water, and closes your mouth, stroking your throat until he feels you swallow.
Bitter, It tastes bitter, rancid almost. Your body does not want whatever this pill offers- that you're sure of. You try to fight it, try to pull back, and spit it out. Jimin's rough fingers stroke your throat.
Namjoon puts a hand over your mouth so that you can and Namjoon growls low. "Swallow." You feel the command in your belly, your knees go weak, and you swallow without thinking. They let you go, Jimin sets you down, but still has to hold you up, your legs shaking like a newborn fawn.
"Was that?" You ask, dazed. Your words not making much sense. Yoongi puppets your arms through the holes of a shirt, pulling your wet hair out, stopping it from sticking to the back of your neck like he knows you hate.
"A contraceptive." Namjoon says, "We just have to be sure." You take greedy breaths of his scent. When he takes you from minnie, holding you up. Dizzy, unable to stand if he wasn’t holding you.
"I know pup, I know. Jinnie and Jungkook have to take them too." And when your whines don't cease. "One day" he promises. The rest of your alphas cast dangerously hungry looks over the top of your head.
But things like children, like pups, are not something you've discussed in any detail and with any certainty. Maybe with Yoongi and Tae every now and then. But you haven’t talked about pups like the rest of them have. Not lucidly. You're not thinking clearly right now, you only want pups because of the heat. No other reason.
Still, you pout up at Namjoon upset. Even while he carries you back downstairs, through the quiet house, past noodle sleeping belly up in his favorite window spot, past your shoes organized neatly by the door and to the heat nest. His arms hardly strain as he gets on his knees and then puts you down.
You keep your arms around his neck, looking at him, and Namjoon lets you.
“Mad at me?” You ask, eyes wide and worried, “don want Joonie to be mad at me.” You are so sensitive and sweet in omegaspace.
Namjoon is keenly aware of Yoongi behind him, he’s still a little angry about the car thing. But Namjoon just rubs his cheek against yours in an attempt at mollifying you. “Never mad at you- promise. Never.”
He tries to pull back but you don't let him. The nest is empty except for Jungkook, watching the two of you with wide dark eyes. You think Jinnie must be in the kitchen with your alpha's. You can hear them talk, hear Jin hiss, "I don't need you to carry me Minnie- yes I'm sure."
Namjoon cocks his head at you. Blinking softly. “Would a…” you nuzzle, and Joonie temporarily quiets, his scent thickening as you shuffle forward and settle onto his lap. “Would a punishment help?”
“Puppishment” Jungkook giggles from nearby, hair all ruffled and mused from rubbing his face into some of your plushies. He must like the way that the word fits in his mouth because he says it again and again, in a little singsong voice. “Puppishment pupishment pupishment” he giggles, and you join in laughing.
Namjoon smiles, looking down at the two of you, setting a hand on either of your heads and petting through your hair, you and Jungkook giggle and press your cheeks together. Your giggles quiet and you peer up at Yoongi in the doorway, sipping at a cup of something (coffee maybe? because he hadn't slept well last night- too busy watching over you) waiting until he nods. Giving you permission.
“Maybe? Gentle? just a little pupishment.” Namjoon hums, agreeing.
You go easily and without any squirming, draped over his lap. No need to pull anything down, no panties, nothing underneath your big shirt. At last one of your alpha's is letting you go belly down. You cling to Namjoon’s thighs, almost dizzy with it- the vulnerability and safety in your position.
You can feel yourself dripping, ever so slightly onto your upper thigh and probably Namjoon's leg. you are always so wet and now is no exception. Namjoon has to notice, his fists tightening for a second at the strength it takes him to hold back.
You can feel his restraint in every touch as he starts to rub, taking gentle handfuls of your behind in his big hands, groaning deep.
“Gentle huh? You just want it soft like that right? Soft like you are. thats why you let us do everything for you right? You just want everything soft and good and sweet like you.”
You suddenly cling to Namjoon’s thigh under your chest, almost looking back at him, tucking your face into the covers of the nest and breathing out at the intensity as he strokes over your behind, up and down.
The actual spanks aren’t anything like you’ve gotten before. Namjoon simply lays his hand against your skin a little quicker than a gentle touch. It makes more noise than anything else. And yet your fingers tangle weakly with the nest as he goes. He doesn’t even make you count them.
He doesn’t spend time touching you there or lower to tip you over into outright arousal although even with his restraint you’re embarrassingly close to cumming by the time he pulls back and sets his hand gently over your warmed bottom. Not even pink he’s been so gentle.
He flips you over, and you stare up at him, eyes dazed and glassy. It’s almost like he’s trying to make sure you don’t get too worked up. Despite the half-hardness you can feel first pressing into your stomach, and now, hard and long against your spine. Namjoon isn't rushing this.
Namjoon doesn't pull your shirt down yet, hiked up to just under your breasts. You rub your knees together and his nostrils flare at the smell of slick, he glances down, then back up at you. Your toes curl.
Jk lunches forward to nip at your ankle. Giggling softly. Jk leans his head between your legs and looks.
Namjoon sets his palm against your stomach, and you hiccup. Namjoon’s hands are so big his thumb and pinky stretch from hipbone to hipbone. Your waist is hardly dainty- not anymore- but you feel utterly small when Namjoon looks down at you, jaw rolling, growling out husky, “better?”
You nod, unable to speak or else risk something- some confession of plea that you’re not ready for. Your alpha continues to touch you, your soft belly, mindless swirls of his fingers. Until your heavy breathing quiets. Your alpha- touching you where you’re going to get bred, where he’s going to fill you. Makes you feel like a butterfly pinned to a piece of cardboard.
"Do you think you could tolerate a hole check without cumming?" Namjoon asks, looking conflicted.
"A hold check? Why?" You're still dizzy. "Aren't you going to be in my hole soon anyway?" Yoongi barks a surprised laugh and Namjoon's adam's apple bobs.
"With Jin and Jungkook we've done this enough that we know they've got like a few hours given-" Namjoon swallows, "how they are. But you've slept so much, we don't really know and-" Namjoon pets softly over your stomach. Yoongi is still watching from the door, hiding his smile with wordlessness from the door.
"Your cervix will start to open up so that you can take our knots extra extra deep. But it will only open if you're nearly there."
"Why- why check now?" you ask, you hiccup, sort of overwhelmed. "Not that I don't want to just-"
Yoongi answers from the door. "It means the difference between the alpha's sleeping in the nest or not tonight. That's why Namjoon is asking." He takes a sip, "We should also know, just like- generally- so that we're not surprised." You look at the window, almost dizzy when you realize it's already dark. You are losing time slipping out of your fingers.
You lift your head, shakey. Nodding, flipping back over onto your stomach, and giving Namjoon permission. Yoongi gets in the nest, and on the back of your neck rubbing soothingly.
Namjoon wastes little time. You sigh at the feeling of his fingers filling you- that- yes that is exactly what you want. "Good pup, relax for me" It's hard, and you whimper.
But Namjoon's fingers crook deep, past the first knuckle and all the way to the second. His fingers feel so long and thick inside of you. You clench a little, trying to pull him deeper. You're so tender and hot inside. Yoongi can see it on Namjoon's face the second it registers precisely what your heat feels like from the inside out.
You feel Namjoon Press against something usually hard that has turned spongey and pliable and so so sensitive. So sensitive that it makes your clit twitch against his pant leg, just a little. Jungkook laughs, and you realize he's ducking low, watching.
"Cute"
You whine and squirm and Yoongi whispers sweet nothings to you. Namjoon pets, moving his fingers. Namjoon presses again and after a brief moment of pressure, he slips through. "There we go pup- all nice and open for us, won't be long now."
The hole check is over before it really even begins. Yoongi crouches over you whispering endless praises as Namjoon asks Jungkook where he'd like your slick to go in the nest. It will be soaked with it in no time, but jk still asks for it to be pressed to his tummy.
You watch them, cheeks warming. Watch as Namjoon smears it over Jungkook's soft stomach. A claiming mark if ever there was one.
Jin teeters to the entrance, looking round and pink-cheeked and substantially plied with food. Waddling with Hobi close behind. Jin's gaze darts from you to Namjoon and back again.
"How long?" Of course, Jin knows, knows exactly what Namjoon has done and why.
"Tonight," Namjoon says. Eyes fixated on the pack omega. "probably not until much much later, we can probably sleep so long as nothing triggers her." He turns to Kookie. "You hear that Koo? No funny buisness, alright? You've got to be extra gentle over the next few hours."
Jungkook just blinks up at Namjoon, albeit coquettishly.
Jin goes for a shower next. But it takes significantly more finagling to get him upstairs than it did for you. You’d never imagine that you’d be the obedient one- given your biting and squirming and whining. But you watch them wrangle Jin as Yoongi goes and gets a towel and a brush for your hair. The two of you are gentle and quiet even if the pack omega is anything but.
The truth is, you and Jungkook are purely entertained.
Jin grips the door frame hard enough that the wood creeks, knuckles turning white. While Hobi and Namjoon both try to get him to leave the next, unsuccessfully. Jin’s body jerks and then his head as he lifts his lip and hisses. Somehow he manages to look cute doing it.
"Why you little- don’t you dare tickle me Hoseok." It takes all four of your alphas and eventually your mate to get him upstairs. You grin at them from the nest and watch them struggle.
“I swear to god Namjoon I will scruff you if you try and order me around.”
"Hyung, we both know you'd enjoy it."
Having Namjoon be the bait makes it deceptively easy to corral your plucky little pack omega upstairs to deal with his 5 o'clock shadow and messy hair. Namjoon runs and Jin hunts him down. You wonder if this is how Jin was when he was younger. All mouthy and bratty.
Jungkook usually doesn't feel his grooming instincts too intensely, but the trembling in his muscles stops once he gets the brush in his hand.
You get a little lucid, just a little- while the alpha’s aren’t in the room. the air clearing from their scent. Jungkook sits behind you and brushes your hair. Tugging you close until you're sitting in his lap. Jungkook feels very very warm behind you. Warmer than usual. The shivers and goosebumps on your skin is concerning and your body still isn't self-regulating correctly. but it's a distant worry with jungkook so close and so warm, pressed hard against your spine.
“What are your heats like Kookie?”
Jungkook just shrugs, dragging the brush through your hair gently, tugging out the tangles with a practiced ease. “I don’t know, just like fuckin and cuddling I guess.”
You laugh, cheeks warm, and you can feel the start of it. A subtle swelling need in your stomach, a feeling that has you wanting to protect it and get belly down in the nest where no one can touch it.
No one except Jin and Jungkook and your mate. They'd probably be safe. They'd probably give you belly rubs.
Jungkook’s heat is hitting a little quicker. His body fighting to catch up to yours and Jin’s. You sit in his lap while he combs your hair. Your legs out in front of you, socked feet pushing at the edge of the nest.
At least until Jungkook’s hands get curious.
They skim first over your shoulders, lightly combing your hair into a loose order, then down your back to your waist. The big shirt no pants combo makes you squirm when Jungkook’s hands go around to your front.
Your back arches into his hands, "Sensitive?" he asks, all but pinching your chest between his fingers, massaging gently, feeling where you're big and plush.
"Yeah- they're like- super tender." He hums behind you but doesn’t stop his pinching. Keeping your body taught. You let Jungkook do what he wants with you, dizzy and susceptible to your need to be good and feel good. He cups your chest in his hands, running his palms up and down them- feeling their weight and their give. You don't stop him, you let him touch.
This is what your omega nestmates are for. To check, to make sure your body is safe just like Namjoon did. You have no doubt that if any of the alpha's do anything that Jungkook doesn't like- he'll tell them.
But Jungkook does like it when you squirm and squeak.
You chirp when Jungkook's hands go greedy, rolling your nipples between his fingers. tugging on them gently. His brain is getting away from him- because Jungkook would never talk this way ordinarily. You know very well that he doesn't want pups and yet- his brain and instincts will temporarily convince him that he wants something different.
"Wanna see these swollen with milk for pups, want alpha to put a pup in you, want him to breed both of us so that we can nest together with our tummies-" He giggles, cute, in omegaspace but so lewd with it. "You'd taste so sweet here, I want it- please-"
The idea of having…milk, of letting your pack omega and nestmate feed from you- makes you feel hot and tingly all over. You don't know if Jin put this idea in your mind and jungkook's or if they're both always like this.
You squirm, trying to get away from Jungkook and tell him that this isn't being a good pup and you know it. But before you can- Jungkook's teeth bite into the nape of your neck. Scruffing you and turning you limp and doll-like against his front. Your head goes fuzzy and you stop squirming, completely boneless.
You feel dizzy, so dizzy at it. he doesn't stop his pinch and pull rythem and you wonder why you ever wanted to stop Jungkook, not when it feels so good having his hands on you, so warm. He lets go of your neck with a hum. licking his teeth when they pop free from your skin.
Jungkook's hands are free to inch lower- past the hem of your shirt and between your thighs. Past your tummy and past your pussy, down low. 
Lower than the alphas would like but there are no alphas here, just you and Jungkook and the nest.
You try to back up into him as his fingers tease, wet with slickness from the first brush.  You wonder if you're leaking a lot already- if you're going to get all wet and messy with your heat. You're already so much wetter than Jungkook and Jin get normally. You're glad that Jin put down some waterproof blankets on the bottom of the nest. It's so embarrassing.
(If only you knew. Jungkook's salivating and he's not even an alpha. Waring with the idea of keeping you close on top of him like this, or detangling himself from you to have a taste. To bully his way back between your thighs like he woke up this morning. He should have taken it while he had the chance. He wants to taste your sweetness, your willingness to be bred, the fertility of your heat hot and sweet on his tongue. He knows the alpha's will go crazy for it. They always do.)
“Can’t wait for Alpha to put his knot in your puphole and make you cry, you're so pretty when you cry, wish I had a knot too- it's so so so unfair.” His fingers continue to move, your toes scrunch, at the pleasure, back arching.
“Which one?”
"Which what?"
"Which hole," you ask shyly. About to close your legs until Jungkook pinches and squeezes at your thighs. His fingers dimple in the fullness there. Opening you wide and pinching until you leave them that way- open and ready for the taking.
You eye the door warily. From the sound of it- your pack is preoccupied with wrangling Jinnie upstairs. but the door is open, anyone could walk by and see your pussy spread open like this. like this- you are jungkook's to display and taunt the alpha's with.
Jungkook presses the pads of his fingers over your entrance. Pinky rubbing low until you squirm from a new kind of sensitivity.
“All of them. This one too.”
You squirm, and Jungkook’s fingers continue their small movements, it’s not like he’s fingering you, but his finger ghosts over your hole, then the other. Clean and soft and damp with slick from where your pussy dribbled down, both entrances sensitive and wet and achey.
His purr builds behind you as he feels and feels and feels. Exploring. His voice is warbly and deep from the purr. "I wish I had two pupholes like you do. Girl omegas are so lucky- can take so many knots at once. Knots are so cute and chubby, wanna bite ‘em."
You giggle and he joins you. Two omegas and a singular fever building between you. Neither of you are thinking straight. Neither in omegaspace nor out of it. "I don't think the alphas would appreciate that."
His fingers tread higher, pressing into your clit until you jerk, rubbing up and down it so that your happy scent bleeds higher and higher. Jungkook pinches, and you try to grab his wrist. Gasping and jerking forward.
Jungkook tugs gently, back and forth, just like with your nipples and it's almost like he's trying to milk you there. your socked feet push at the nest but jungkook holds you and you can't get away from it. it's too much. The pleasure pain need of it is so intense you see black spots in your vision.
You're a little panicked, “Koo- koo- can't- please- they’ll be angry.”
“Let them be.”
But after another tug, He lets your clit go and you jerk, resting back against his front. Hiccuping. Jungkook's fingers stay like that between your legs, urging little 'ah ah ah's from your throat. But he doesn't get quite so rough with you again. This time- Jungkook stays soft.
Wetness and the sweetness of slick slowly building and building- not just from you. Jungkook stops teasing you quite so bad and just leaves his fingers at the precipice of entering you. Plugging up the slick and keeping it from dripping out. Resting his fingers just there inside of you, almost like reverse cockwarming. Like he's keeping your hole warm and stretched around his fingers. Ready for the alpha's later.
It's a little maddening. Having him just touch but not move. Have him guard your holes and settle back. There's very little satisfaction in it.
Sweat drips down your temple, Jungkook leans forward to nuzzle it and lap at your cheek.
You're still like that, legs splayed so that Jungkook can play with you and on display When Namjoon and Yoongi round the corner into the nest room.
You jolt at the sudden surprise and try to close your legs, but Jungkook keeps them open with messy fingers. Slick turning your skin glossy when Jungkook holds your thigh open. Yoongi's chest heaves, and he curses low, "Jesus Koo you-" Yoongi actually laughs. Rubbing at his face, cheeks pink.
Namjoon is not amused, eyes going dark. Especially once Jungkook takes his fingers away and lets you gush, just a little. A barely visible trail of slick dripping from one hole to the other as they watch. Yoongi's Addams apple bobs as he swallows.
Namjoon's wearing a dark red mark on his collarbone (probably from Jin given once he caught him) The top of his shoulders crested with faint wetness like he'd unintentionally gotten stuck under the spray of the shower upstairs. But Namjoon looks…steamy. Steaming with anger once Jungkook’s fingers tread lower. He takes your slick and feeds it back up to your fluttering entrance.
It's sort of hot, you clench around Jungkook's fingers and both of them- both Namjoon and Yoongi look, watching. Yoongi covers his mouth, "fuck Jungkook you can't-"
You can feel Jungkook’s grin pressed to the back of your neck, you know what his eyes look like- owlish over the top of your head. Namjoon glares from the doorway, as Jungkook's fingers just barely tread inside and you mewl softly. jungkook spreads his fingers, Holding you open and showing your alpha and your mate how warm and wet you are. Don't they want a taste? Don't they want to feel inside? Jungkook can feel and it’s ////heavenly.
Namjoon's foot depresses the edge of the nest. “Touching what isn’t yours Koo?" Namjoon shakes his head, jaw rolling. "You know better.”
Jungkook does not go easily. Namjoon ends up having to call for backup. Jimin almost slips coming down the stairs. The wooden thud of his ass connected with a step resounding through the house.
Things go from being good to being scary to being good again so fast it gives you whiplash.
Yoongi helps you sit up on your thighs, still too shakey to stand. You don’t need to be held while Jungkook twists and rolls out of Namjoon and Jimin’s hold laughing all the while. The alpha's groan in frustration, unable to get their arms around him for long, unable to subdue him. Both of you watch, Yoongi leans down to kiss your forehead, "You okay?" you shift, uncomfortable. And he produces a wipe from somewhere a hidden stash of clean-up items in the rim of the nest. "Messy there?" he knows you so well. Hands it over rather than clean you himself. Although it's mostly a lost cause.
Jungkook laughs and rolls again while Namjoon curses. Cheek’s pink, scent sweetening while being chased. “Every time” Yoongi informs you, “every time- every heat- Jungkook makes the alpha’s chase him.” His giggle warms your back.
 Jimin tries to get his hands around Jungkook’s wrists but he twists and twists and twists.
You giggle from the nest, at their frustration, at how Jungkook’s clearly enjoying himself. Dodging their hands. But then there’s Tae, there by the door, Crossing her arms and waiting expectantly. All but tapping her slippered foot. Staring down at him completely unimpressed.
It takes them a second to spot her. Jimin does first, straightening up immediately once he spots her glower. Jungkook does not spot her as quickly sliding to the floor with his hands around Namjoon’s waist, grinning, cheeks pink and eyes hazy. Almost pulling his pants down with how tight he grapples with him.
"Jungkook.”
Jungkook looks up, face going pale, shooting to his feet in front of her. Not flinching when she reaches out and pinches his nape. Jungkook lets her and whines through it. “There we go pup, you just needed someone to make you listen huh? Come upstairs. Now.” Jungkook follows, as if in a trance. Unable to tear his eyes away from her. Obediently holding her hand, looking scolded and mildly scared.
Your mate huffs and leans over to scoop you closer, but you squirm. Remembering his promise to let you go outside of the nest once you'd showered.
“Tae is kinda scary when she wants to be.”
“Yeah,” you sigh, staring after her lovingly.
“Do you think you could eat some more breakfast?”
“Maybe.” You say, and Yoongi smiles sweetly. With his arms around you, it's the calmest you've felt, the gentlest you've felt all morning. It's not like omegaspace- although you know you're in it, as you whine against his throat.
Yoongi smiles, “I’ll take that. C’m on.”
You know what awaits Jungkook upstairs, a spanking over the clothes and not under because that would be giving in too much. And any more would surely send Jungkook hurtling straight past pre-heat and into heat.
Jungkook doesn’t understand what the big deal is, it’s going to be a shit show anyways, with three omegas in heat and only 5 packmates to help them through it. It means that no one will be offered a full heat spike of time in between knotting's. Even less because Yoongi doesn’t have a knot (obviously) and probably won’t be able to help as much with Jungkook and Jin like he used to.
Judging from the way you wrap yourself around his back and stubbornly refuse to go anywhere- he’ll be preoccupied during your heat. You stare at Yoongi as he guides you to the kitchen, bumping into the couch and the walls because you don’t want to stop looking. Hobi laughs, coming around you, guiding you away from the lamp. He doesn’t ask what you’re doing out of the nest. He already knows. He’s toting Jin behind him- who looks sleepy and soft and scrubbed raw.
He doesn't talk, probably can't with the strength of his purrs as Hobi sits him down at the kitchen island and starts feeding him. You stubbornly refuse to sit anywhere but Yoongi's lap. A predicament that Yoongi is only too happy to have himself in. Enough that Hobi leans over and teases you with a pinch to your scent gland.
“Huh, maybe you won’t even need us, just want your mate huh?”
“Jinnie and Yoongi and Koo- please Koo,” you parrot, feeling small. Eyes upturned at Yoongi, asking him so nicely for it that he can't help but squeeze around your waist extra tight. You let out a little squeak. As if on cue from upstairs, you hear a loud shout, a tumble, a giggle. Probably the alpha's manhandling Jk into the tub and Jungkook making them work for it.
Yoongi is quite plainly using your squishy-at-the-edges state to ply you with enough fruit to fill your tummy and hopefully tide you over. Getting you to eat over the next few days will be difficult, and he’s trying (and succeeding) to fatten you up in the meantime- just a little.
Most of the food and fruit- the pack's usual rut and heat staples, were prepped yesterday by the others during Yoongi's staring match with the street. The food is mild enough that it won’t bother your stomach.
You are utterly obedient whenever he holds out a piece of food, lips closing around his fingers, chewing and looking up at him, listless almost not blinking. The next time he feeds you- you bite down past the fruit and onto his fingers. Jin has to lean over to pinch your jaw to get you to let go. "Sorry," you say, licking your teeth. Aching and aching and aching. "Didn't mean to just-"
"It's okay." Yoongi just wipes his fingers on a nearby cloth, "You can bite me all you like."
"Can I?" you ask, almost excited for it.
"Of course, I'm yours." You purr, and park for face in Yoongi's throat, and really- it works against him, because now he can't get you to eat anymore, can't until he sighs and starts to pop the buttons on his sleep shirt. "There, happy now?" You suck hickey after hickey onto Yoongi's chest. Echoing each mark for a bit of food.
Hobi leaves because Tae calls for him, not upstairs but from the nesting room, leaving you, Jin, and Yoongi to eat. Eventually, you push at Yoongi's hands, nudging him to the pack omega. Jin eats slowly, eyes on you, pink-cheeked and slow. You're starting to burn a fever and Yoongi and Jin both know it won't go away.
"How will I know when my heat's hitting?" You'd asked earlier, "You'll know" is all Jinnie had said.
When the fruit is maybe half finished you start to hear it- some shouting from the other room. Not Jungkook, not even Hobi who returned upstairs to give Jungkook the remainder of his bath but is coming down now. Jungkook like you- had refused all but one item of clothing at this point. Is only in shorts. Yoongi does not let you scent him as you walk by. Joining the sound of Jimin, Namjoon, and Tae arguing in the other room.
It's a little silly when you see.
They've got the pack's sex toy boxes open in front of them, knots and cocks and dildos all laid out on the edge of the nest, big ones and colorful ones and ones with knotting attachments. The pack doesn't see these things as their replacement but as their best asset in heat.
And yet, they bicker.
"There's just no way- I know you want to do this heat all-natural hyung. But we won't be able to."
"Not unless we take fucking Viagra or something." Tae doesn’t laugh, a clawed hand over her face.
"No way, no one is taking anything. Mini- we can make due."
"My knot is gonna fall off hyung."
"It is not."
"Is too."
"Is not."
They're all overtired, instincts awake and exerted, just the same as you. Yoongi steps through you and Jin to go comfort them at the same moment that Hobi lets go of Jungkook's wrist. The rest of them are inside of the nest room leaving You, Jungkook, and Jin out in the hallway.  
Jungkook widens his stance. Just a little. Powerful thighs tensing.
(At the end of the day, your heat is less of a controlled burn, and more of an explosion)
His dark eyes are wide, tracking the alpha movements, you watch Jungkook watch them. Feeling the sluggish thump of your heartbeat. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Jin mirror him. Feet shoulder with apart, at the ready.
Your heart thuds loud in your ears as you watch the alpha's movements too. All of a sudden, you can't take your eyes off of them. They’re not a threat but not not a threat. You're closest but you still brace yourself.
You physically watch the hair stand up on Namjoon's neck, and the alpha's turn slow. Eyes narrowing. Jin's hand slides from your wrists to your hand, giving you a squeeze before he lets go. Jin's grinning. So is Jungkook- it's a little feral- but it feels it feels-
There is a heat under your skin, burning everywhere your body touches that's not them, like a brand or maybe like a freshly forged string of fate.
it feels Good, it burns but you feel free. Your instincts course through you like adrenaline only worse. You do not feel settled, you feel alive and wild. Strong and powerful. You feel ready. All three of your scents swell sweet, building and building on each other, you sway, a little unsteady. Teetering.
Namjoon's eyes are so wide they could be mini-moons. His chest rippled with a warning growl. "Omega." It's a warning, the lethal purr in Namjoon’s tone says no nonsense will be tolerated.
 Jungkook takes it as a challenge.
For a second, no one moves and no one breathes, but then you're scattering like the rats from Ratatouille. The omegas running and giggling down the hall and the alpha bolting after you, trying to catch you. Legs pumping, moving against the floor.
Yoongi bolts, anticipating your movement the second before you do. He's quicker than all the alphas and he goes for you first. Grabbing you and heaving you up as you giggle and kick your feet the alpha shoots past you.
"No! I've gotta!"
Omegaspace zoomies are so much fun, Yoongi is grinning, lets you down, lets you take another step before he's trying to scoop you up again. A cat playing with a mouse, letting it get a bit farther away before you pounce.
Only you have learned, you did learn from Jungkook earlier, because you twist out of Yoongi's arms.
"Oh no you don't-"
Namjoon lunges for Jin but the pack omega dodges and Namjoon's arms close around nothing. Jungkook is the fastest by far and Jimin's legs pump, almost sliding across the smooth polished floor to get to Jungkook. The omega laughs as he slips out of Jimin's grasp.
You try to follow them but you don't get very far, someone's hands around your wrist that almost tugs you clean off your feet but into a pair of arms. Several pairs of arms, sweet smelling and victorious surround you.
Really, you never had a chance.
There is something in your instinct settled by it, by being chased and restrained. Your alphas can’t have you unless they try- unless they try really really hard to catch you. they won’t be able to take the sweetness between your legs and do something with it unless they earn it.
You get dragged to the floor. Tae's dress feels silky against your shins. Yoongi's hands are rough on your shoulders. Hobi's touch- hard against your thigh. you laugh and try to roll again but this time- you are unable to get away from them.
You look up at them and whimper. Parting your legs in defeat. hot, you feel hot all over.
Yoongi doesn't hesitate, palms you blatantly between your legs. "is this what you needed sweetheart? A little bit of roughness. you're too delicate. too little for things like this. almost makes me think you don't want us to be gentle with you."
you're so hot you feel like you're burning, whimpering out something that sounds suspiciously like "please"
"you need to ask."
you can do little more but chirp in reply. but yoongi wasn't really expecting anything coherent from you at this point.
Jungkook gets the farthest. Almost to the end of the hall before Jimin bares down upon him, pushing him almost to the floor. Jungkook's mouth open in a soundless snarl. Face more animal than human as he paws at Jimin's body. Neither trying to hurt him or pleasure him. Needy and feral.
Jimin tries to turn him over, to get him to present but Jungkook won't. Not until he's in the nest. You should be trying harder to get away. Harder to get out of Yoongi's hands around your waist but you don't, too busy watching.
Namjoon and Jin are similarly wrestling. A little less far into the hall but still farther than you got. The pack omega is belly up, not belly down, making Namjoon work for it to try and twist him around. It's feral and it's a little primal. The way that Namjoon nips at his throat. Jin tries to kick at Namjoon's thigh but Namjoon grabs it and pulls him back by his ankle, Jin's whole body sliding on the floor. 
Tae grabs one of your wrists and Hobi grabs the other, yoongi hooks his fingers into your pussy, one hand around your middle and in a feat of strength that impresses you the small tiny corner of your brain that's lucid- he picks you up off the floor. Heaving you up back towards the nest. Towards safety. yoongi's fingers leave you and you want them back instantly. crying for it.
Jimin throws Jungkook over his shoulder. Namjoon and Jin keep fighting, too evenly matched. Another alpha will have to help him settle the pack omega. Once you’re in the nest, once you’re knotted and docile and fucked so full you can’t move.
You grind back against Yoongi's hips, feeling the hardness there, the cock that's yours yours yours. Almost giddy at the prospect of getting put in your place.
You grin and taste blood.
~-~
Come tell me what you liked about this chapter!
Birthday Pup list
Notes
this is another chapter of mindless fluff- mostly because i just could not edit it in time with the last chapter.
i feel like i need to warn you guys that the next chapter! the heat sex stuff! will not be able to be posted for at least another two weeks because i am going away next weekend to the west coast to help my older sister shop for her wedding dress. i wish i was one of the those people who could write on planes but i can'ttttt i have about 3k already written for it but! it's going to take me a minute and i'm sorry!
i didn't origionally intend for there to be so much body worship in this- but i think given the m/c's internal monolouge early in the series, a bit of tummy worship can't hurt.
m/c, me, and everyone looking at jk: i wanna knock him up.
i think i may have gone a bit far with the jin wanting to brestfeed the m/c thing, but i cant even help it it makes me feel so soft in like a horny sort of way i loveeeee it
i don't know why i love the idea of woumb fucking so much, like listen- i know that it's physically impossible in humans and like- that it's all just a fantasy but i love this fantasy.
there was surprisingly more smut in this chapter than i originally intended.
i am also usually not a fan of booty stuff but??? jk + booty stuff??? yes please give it to me, i love that he just plays the m/c like a fiddle.
maybe the use of 'puphole' is cringey but it's also so cute and lewd i like it. let me know if it squiks you or not.
i think i might...be into pussy torture a little...like when jk pinches her clit and is a little mean thats like- so my thing you know. jk goes so feral.
this chapter is a little less like "there are concrete things that happen" and more just me thinking of things i want to write and putting it in <3
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moonchild1 · 9 months ago
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park jimin fic rec list (Ⅲ)
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woah it really has been a long time since i posted but i am so glad to be back and to get back into reading i saw so many of my favourite authors have updated and i am beyond excited to start this journey again but in the mean time here's jimin rec list as promised it was so exciting finishing this list cause i got so nostalgic making it and reading all the old fics i had on my reading list ughhh i just loved it so much and it got me back into the swing of things and i cant wait to make more lists, i do have another jjk list ready and i will post it the day after tomorrow so i hope you enjoy this one and don't forget to show all the love and support in the world to these amazing authors they work so hard to create these fics for us and they deserve endless praise and love for the commitment and generosity they have so please do leave them a comment, heart or reblog a small comment can go a long way here and can make someone smile even bigger so dont don't shy away from making someone happy... as usual you guys know this fics i recommend contain smut so minors don't interact you will be blocked... i really do love hearing from you guys so if you do have a little fic you are super into right now and you just want to rant about how amazing it is feel free to send me an ask 😊🖤
a- angst s- smut f- fluff
series
plot twist by @xpeachesncream f s a
↳ jimin isn’t interested in fake dating, but he’s definitely interested in getting to know someone the right way. after all, he feels like he’s ready to put himself out there and give it all he’s got. so, he takes a risk in trying something completely out of his comfort zone and hops on the new, popular dating app - only to come across and get to know someone he didn’t expect to meet.
a remedy for mondays by @dovechim s
↳ all you wanted was just one day off work. but for that to happen, you need to invent a plausible reason. and then somehow, somewhere along the way, things get out of hand, and now people think you’re having a baby with your co-worker Park Jimin after a one-night stand. confused? join the club.
it’s okay, that’s love by @/dovechim f s a deals with deep subjects
↳ People are constantly making some kind of connection with each other- be it friendship or romance. But human bonds always lead to messy complications; commitment, sharing, driving people to the airport, letting them get up close and personal with the darkest parts of ourselves. And sure- it’s scary as hell to watch them cross those boundaries you’ve so meticulously drawn, but it’s okay, because that’s love.
so it goes by @/dovechim f s
↳ Park Jimin knows a lot about humans. of course he does, he studies them for a living. he knows that they say hello by holding hands, and when they say goodbye, they put their arms around each other. but this particular human, he notes, is unlike the rest- stuck in a slump, going about your day praying for the Universe to stage an intervention in the form of an alien abduction. when he decides to finally fulfil your wishes, he finds that you have a little something to teach him about what it means to live life on Earth the way you do: ugly crying, underwear and all. in return, he shows you the possibilities that abound if you simply adopted their mantra: everything is beautiful, and nothing hurts.
love again by @taestefully-in-luv f s a
↳ A friend of yours is eager to introduce you to her new man but what happens when Park Jimin, the man who broke your heart 5 years ago walks in through the door?
the other woman: the seduction and the illusion by @namjooningelsewhere f s a
↳ No one told you being the other woman would never be easy, No one told you that his love would be two sides to a same coin. No one told you he came to you because you were his escape to his demons. No one told you he would always call you his, but he would never be yours. And most importantly no one told you, He never loved you because you dont destroy the people you love.
FUTURE HEARTS by @jungblue f s a ft. jjk
↳ It was everything, from his tattoos, to his touches, to the way sweat rolled down his neck as he strummed into his guitar on stage; everything about him completely enthralled you. So why are you now, two and a half years later, on a train to Seoul, telling a complete stranger the recollection of how you became fated to forever have scars on all of your future hearts due to the happiness, but most of all the pain, that came along with falling in love with Jeon Jungkook. 
after the applause by @foxymoxynoona
↳ Jimin doesn't know how he would have made it this far after the shattering of his world without the support of his thoughtful, generous, helpful neighbor. Hanbyul has lived next to hottie Jimin and his adorable daughter for years now, long enough to remember the wife he was so devoted to and lost far too young. With each safely ensconced on their side of the brick wall of the Parks' grief, it will take an enterprising little scientist to set the stage for a second chance at love.
saved by @to-star-lake s a
rockstar au deep subjects read warnings
midnight memories by @hobipaint f s a
↳ there's drunk habits, and then there's drunk mistakes. What do you call meeting your friend - no, ‘former friend’ - at a bar, getting drunk with him and sleeping- 'accidentally' - with him? especially when everyone already knows that you stay away from him as much as the day does from night?
Easy. You forget about it.
heartbreak chronicles by @sugaxjpg s
↳ Park Jimin had it all — good grades, a place as the soccer team’s captain and, more than that, the broken hearts of at least half the campus’ population. Though, one thing he did not have was someone willing to break his heart and, after you were dragged inside a miraculous plan to play that part, the last thing counted on was the preposterous idea that, perhaps, you could fall for him as well. 
drifting by@hongcherry f a
↳ After being assigned different partners for your midterm routine, your and Jimin’s relationship starts to deteriorate when you both begin spending more time away from each other and with your assigned partners instead.
growing pains by @taleasnewastime f s a
↳ Growing up the daughter of the boss of a gang is never easy, but normally the problems are around being given too many responsibilities, or the risk of being connected to a gang leader, or wanting to escape but not being able to. But you’ve got a different problem, you want more responsibility, want to be like your brother who’s been named heir, want a role in the family gang. Your whole life you’ve been denied what you want, being born a female seemingly your main issue; perceived as weak, naïve, trying to step above your station. But as unsupportive and dismissive as your family is, there is always the bright light that is Jimin; the boy you love but can never have.
tuqburni by @solastia f s a ft.myg
↳ You’ve spent two years building a life with Yoongi who you loved more than anything in the world. Now, his ex-boyfriend Jimin is back in the picture, and Yoongi begs you not to make him choose between the two of you, offering the choice of a polyamorous relationship. Though your heart is shattered, you agree.
stardust by @venusjeon f a
↳ struck by your beauty, Jimin begs to paint you naked behind the world's back so as not to stain your influential family—his patrons—with scandal.
drift by @snackhobi f s
↳ You used to think that there was nothing better than the sensation of coming first place. However, your rival- the talented, gorgeous, dangerous Park Jimin- is more than happy to prove you wrong.
the deli diaries by @jimlingss f
↳ Working at a grocery store deli is absolutely unbearable (and you’re also perfectly aware of how dramatic you are). But it seems like something, or rather, someone might make the job a bit more manageable.
best of me by @xotoosweet f a
↳ when he tells the story of how he met you in a few years, he'll claim that it was meant to be. you'll laugh and call it a coincidence. it was a coincidence that on the first day of summer semester, he decided to go on a run (though he claimed he always ran in the mornings). it was a coincidence that he chose a less traveled path in the university arboretum that morning. and it was definitely a coincidence that you were there, sitting on the rail of the river bridge.
the ten days of ex-mas by @kpopfanfictrash f s a
↳ Three months following the worst break-up of your life, you finally feel ready to start moving on. The world, it seems, has other ideas when you pick up the phone and find your ex-boyfriend calling.
strip by @yoonia f s a
↳ Summary | Everything you have done has always been about surviving life and raising your child on your own. Having someone else caring about you was the last thing you had expected. Especially when that someone is the same man you have watched performing every night on stage and secretly admired. But will he run the moment he finds out about your little secret waiting at home?
falling by @/yoonia s a
↳ For Park Jimin, you are everything he will ever need—his assistant, his housekeeper, his task runner, his fairy godmother. For you, he is more than everything. You have dedicated your life for him and, before you even realised it, your heart belongs to him alone. The only problem is that he is never yours, and you are living in a world that your love for him is nothing more than a fairytale ending. As you are suddenly given a chance to wake up and face the real world, will you be ready to embrace it? Will he be ready to deal with the world without you in it?
wrapped around by @jjkfire ft. kth f s a
↳ Freshman year was a mess and sophomore year doesn’t seem to be looking too good either. You know boys like them are no good for you but maybe they’re just your kind of type
baby, baby by @hobiwonder f s a
↳ When you’ve run out of savings to continue on to the last semester of your Bachelors - you take an unorthodox route. Helping a desperate couple have a child and getting paid for it? Heck yeah. But what do you know - it wasn’t as easy as it sounds.
love at first touch by bagelswrites (ao3)
↳ The first time you meet your soulmate, it leaves a bruise on both of you at the point of contact. From then on, your body begins rejecting any sustenance other than the touch of your soulmate. The trick is, the bruises take a few hours to appear, so you have to figure out who you've touched and find them before you starve to death. But once you do, all you ever need is them. So what happens if you're an idol and you meet your soulmate at a fan event?
our little family by @nightbts f a
↳ you were living a simple life filled with simple dreams; combining your two most loved things in life, children and teaching, you were starting out your career as a teacher at the local pre-school. but little did you know, how one child and her very special father, would change your simple life into something extraordinary
one-shot 35
brand new eyes by @missgeniality s
↳ Jimin’s eyes had potential to ruin you, and tonight you test the damage.
waves by @shina913 s
↳ It's Valentine's Day and your boyfriend decides to spice things up with a little surprise for you.
failure to communicate by @gukslut s
↳ Enemies to Lovers/ College AU
physical by @ppersonna f s
↳ you cant seem to escape the sexy fitness instructor that seemingly is everywhere you turn. it’s enough to make you irrational.
good for you by @candlewaxandp0lar0ids s
↳ Jimin can’t help the way he drowns himself in you. Why should he anyway?
ho-ho-home by @jjungkookislife s a
↳ Golden neighbor extraordinaire, Park Jimin, is (unintentionally) stealing your spotlight this holiday season. Despite your one sided rivalry with him, all Jimin wants is for you to remember him, to remember your past and hopefully create a future with you.
100km/hour by @chateautae s
↳ what exactly happens when you and your friends have to pile into one car for the ride home after an insane halloween party, and you find yourself sitting in park jimin’s lap? especially when he’s dressed as an angel, and you’re in the sluttiest devil costume ever?
what it's like by @jimilter s
↳ You’ve always heard great tales about how good the infamous fuckboy on campus, Park Jimin, is in bed, and wondered if there could be any truth behind these claims when the guy looks like an angel with his cheruby cheeks and precious smiles. So when a new gossip starts to circulate about how ‘hard he hits’, you have had enough of the suspense and decide to finally sample him yourself.
feel your touch by @/jimilter f s a
↳ You have always known yourself to be a sexual switch in bed, flipping between exercising and submitting control according to different situations and partners. And this camboy you are addicted to, one that seems to kinda reciprocate your interest, submits so beautifully that you just want to command him. But when things progress to levels you never anticipated, you end up discovering pleasant surprises that might just change your life.
the prince’s cinderella syndrome by @/jimilter f s a ft jjk
↳ He shows up at Halloween, every year, dressed the same, and leaves at midnight like some Cinderella. You would think he was a prankster if his eyes didn't look like they contained all the sadness in the world. You don't know him - no one on campus does. You don't know why he appears only once a year. You don't know why he never smiles. But you can't help falling in love with him. Even if he breaks your heart when he abandons you at midnight, again.
scream your panties by @opaljm s a
↳ As your midterms have ended and Halloween has arrived, you are looking forward to a pleasant time relaxing and enjoying the festivities at your sorority and Jimin’s frat houses. Luck is not in your favor, though, because things keep going wrong like a trail of dominoes falling – the only upside to your slowly deteriorating day being that you get to end it with your boyfriend’s delicious self between your legs.
first snow, last kiss by @taeshobipop f s a
↳ He broke your heart four years ago; the old loving memories of your time together now tainted by pure betrayal. Yet in the haze of new snow, after returning home for the first time, the moments you had once convinced yourself were nothing but a lie, reveal themselves to be otherwise.
antifreeze by @winetae s
↳ Jimin participates in the school’s adaption of The Nutcracker for extra credit but doesn’t expect his new dance partner to a) be this bad at dancing and b) be this fucking cute
what she likes by @untaemedqueen f s
idol au husband au marriage au
only you by @personasintro f s a
↳  you’ve been always there for your best friend, even when he became a single dad 
sucker by @/personasintro s a
↳ You wish you'd pay more attention to Jimin. Like, how his eyes kept changing color. How cold his skin was, too unrealistically to be natural. Or one second, he flashed you with his sharp canines and the next one he didn't have any. How much he craved for you, but not the way you thought he was.
please, lie to me by @ressjeon s a
↳ "centuries of loyalty vs. only months of fucking, how could you miscalculate?"
summer synchrony by @seokkgenie f s a
↳ childhood friends to lovers
neon seoul @readyplayerhobi f s a
↳ It the city of New Seoul, another homicide isn’t newsworthy but instead just a statistic. But when the son of the mayor is murdered in an alley in a shady part of the city? Then it’s important. You and your partner, Detective Park Jimin, are given the honour of investigating the crime. Will you find out who killed him? Or will you fail?
serendipity by @btsracket s a ao3
↳ It's serendipitous. Jimin braces for darkness but finds his light instead.
the boyfriend concept by @/kpopfanfictrash s
↳ Win a Date with a Porn Star! You saw the sign when you walked in, of course, but you had no idea your friend dropped your name into the raffle. Fast-forward to later that day, when you actually win. You are horrified, of course, with no intention of accepting and setting yourself up for embarrassment. But then you meet Jimin, and decide this might be worth a shot.
Lovely Demons by @/kpopfanfictrash s a
↳ As penance for a crime committed long, long ago, the Witch Council banished you to the feared Tholoss forest. Your sentence was one hundred thousand days of solitude – or death, whichever came first. Your only hope of salvation comes from the demon names routinely sent your way; creatures who escape the inner circles of Hell and pose a threat to the mortal realms. For each demon you kill, days are removed from your sentence. For years you’ve existed, biding your time, until one morning you receive a name which throws your entire world into chaos: the name of Park Jimin, High Prince of Hell himself.
blue blood by @joonbird s a
↳ “Prince Jimin was born with blue blood. His coronation is rapidly approaching, but there are two requirements he must fulfil before becoming a king. He must have the skills to fight in battle, and he must have a Queen with blood as blue as his. You, a member of the royal guard, are assigned to teach Jimin the ins and outs of combat. You are not scared of death, of blood, or of battle. What you are scared of however, is falling in love with Jimin, the one man your blood decrees you can never have.”
i want to be with you by @oddinary4bts f s a
↳ moving to Seoul has always seemed like a good idea, until the bubble bursts when you realize your new neighbor is Park Jimin, and he's not the sweet angel you've always imagined him to be. Will the reality of Park Jimin forever be a nightmare, or will he turn into a sweet dream?
locked in love by @parkmuse f s a
↳ Getting locked in the mall on Christmas eve isn’t ideal, but getting locked in the mall with your brothers best friend that you haven’t seen in a while? Well, it might have been alright if you didn’t have feelings for him.
peaches and cream by @snackhobi s
↳ you wouldn’t mind your cute neighbour being such a shameless fuckboy if a) the walls weren’t so thin and b) he didn’t seem intent on adding you as another notch in his bedpost. 
reset by @/dovechim s
↳ We are made of the pieces of what we remember, and we hold in ourselves the hopes and fears of those who love us. As long as there are memories to call our own, there can be no true loss. But Park Jimin has no such privilege. 
the dark side of the moon by @/dovechim s
↳ falling in love at first sight is cliche, not until it happens to you on a dark night in a lonely alley. but you’re only human, while Park Jimin is Alpha of his pack; it could never work out. so you resort to pining for him like a wolf howling at the moon, but when Jimin goes feral, that’s when everything changes. 
Unconditionally by @kstopping s a
↳ Jimin constantly torments you. But you love it.
Instinct by @evangelene f a
↳ A lost child appears into your life only to bring you closer Jimin–a man that you’d thought you’d hated once upon a time. Now all you want is to be there for the child, and maybe his father–but only if his mother gets the hell out of the way.
eternal sunlight by @kidguk f s a
↳ “college and soulmate au where the first words your soulmate will say to you are tattooed on your wrist. jimin thinks he met his soulmate exactly four months after he met and fell in love with you. you can’t explain your attraction or your feelings toward him, even though technically you’re meant to be with other people. taehyung and jungkook helpfully suggest that the universe might be glitching.”
foul play by @kimvtae f s a
↳ Everyone loves a good rivalry, and the students at your university are no exception. Unluckily for you, the rivalry of the decade is between yourself and a furiously irritating Park Jimin. A top gymnast and a basketball star shouldn’t cross paths, but Jimin makes his way into your heart before you can put a stop to it.
lost and found by @/kimvtae s a
↳ The only thing bigger than Park Jimin’s ass is his ego. After one too many scandals, after one too many mornings stumbling back to the dorms drunk or ruining the reputations of other idols, Jimin is given an ultimatum: complete a rehabilitation program in America or leave Bangtan.
if we were a movie by @/kimvtae f s a
↳ Friends with benefits never worked in the movies, but you and Jimin had been friends for so long, it was bound to work for you. Until, of course, Jimin gets a girlfriend, and you fear you may lose your friendship with him for good.
the pull of the tides by @goldenscript f s
↳ The expanse of the deep blue sea has always drawn you in. Each ebb and flow of the tides never ceasing to take your breath away. And now, a boy with hair as light as the morning sun and a smile just as bright does too. 
hard to say by @floralseokjin f s a
↳you've had feelings for your best friend Jimin for as long as you can remember, but you always thought they were unreciprocated. What if it turned out they weren’t...?
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↬looking for pjm library or the other members check out my library
1K notes · View notes
chimcess · 27 days ago
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⮞ Teaser Pairing: Jungkook x Reader Other Tags: Hockey Player!Jungkook, Figure Skater!Reader, Hockey Player!Taehyung, Hockey Player!Jimin, Coach!Yoongi, Hockey Player!Namjoon, Hockey Player!Hoseok, Figure Skater!Jin, Genre: Hockey!AU, Figure Skating!AU, Olympic!AU, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Self-Discovery, Fluff, Angst, Eventual Smut, Slow Burn Drop Date: 01/20/2025 Summary: Y/N Y/L/N has always been destined for greatness as a competitive figure skater, her dreams of the Olympics sparkling like the ice beneath her blades. But when a devastating injury sidelines her, those dreams seem to melt away. Just when she feels lost, she unexpectedly meets Jeon Jungkook, a talented NHL hockey player.
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I never used to think about what came after. Why would I? It felt pointless, like trying to guess the end of a novel when you’re still tangled in the middle. Every chapter rushing by, barely letting you catch your breath. Sometimes, life dangled a dream so vivid, so close, you could almost feel it in your hands. But right when you thought you had it? That’s when life reminded you—pages stop turning. Lights flick off. And suddenly, you’re back in the grind, stuck right where you started.
Normal? No chance. I wouldn’t recognize normal if it jumped out of the shadows and hit me. Normal was for people who punched clocks and sipped lukewarm coffee in beige cubicles. My mornings started when the world was still dark—lacing up my skates, the cold air biting at my face. Stretch until the pain dulled, practice until my routines were burned into my mind like a broken record. The rink smelled like sweat, frost, and desperation, clinging to me as I chased that perfect moment, day in and day out.
That was my life. Until it wasn’t.
From the moment I took my first steps, the ice had been my escape. My personal sanctuary. Each time my skates touched the frozen surface, electricity sparked through me, alive in my bones. My mom, Emily, she saw it first. She recognized that fire in me and latched on, pulling me headfirst into the competitive skating world. She wasn’t just supportive—she was relentless, like a storm barreling down on me, pushing me to be perfect. To her, maybe that was all that mattered.
People whispered behind her back, saying she was living vicariously through me, chasing dreams she’d lost. But I didn’t resent her for it. Her ambition, fierce and all-consuming, burned like a fire. It kept me warm—even when it scorched me. It wasn’t the trophies or the standing ovations that drove me. It was the ice itself. Out there, I wasn’t just a name on a roster. I was free.
Emily had been a skater once, too. But life, cruel and chaotic, had other plans. Her dreams fizzled out, lost somewhere between time and circumstance. When she got pregnant with me, she married my dad, Jim, and watched her ambitions wither like dead leaves. Year by year, regret settled in, until all she had left was me—and the ice. I became her second chance.
She met Jim when she was still a bright-eyed girl in a small town, dreaming big. He came to Michigan for police training; she was restless, yearning for more. They fell in love—or something close to it. Soon enough, I came along, and after a quick courthouse wedding, our lives unraveled. Emily and I left Michigan for Colorado, chasing skating dreams. Jim drifted back to Olympia, Washington, sinking into his routine like it was quicksand.
I became the bridge between them, constantly tugged between my dad’s predictable world and my mom’s fierce drive. Stability—something I longed for—was never in the cards. Emily hated Michigan, so we stayed away. Jim became less of a father and more of a ghost.
The crackle of the intercom yanked me from my thoughts. My knee throbbed, a bitter reminder.
“Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain. We’re starting our descent into Detroit, where it’s currently five-eighteen p.m., and a frigid fifteen degrees Fahrenheit. Please secure your belongings.”
Michigan. I was back, but it didn’t feel like home. It hadn’t for years. And yet, here I was. Family wasn’t a refuge—not with Jim. He felt more like a stranger now, a shadow of someone I used to know. The home we once had? Long gone.
Monday, I’d meet with Dr. Jeon. People swore he was the best, but deep down, I already knew none of it mattered. The moment my skate hit that rough patch of ice, when my body twisted and the world flipped upside down, I knew—my skating days were over.
I could still see it. The rink, bathed in soft afternoon light, the sound of *Swan Lake* floating through the air. I wasn’t competing that day, just skating for the sheer joy of it. Emily and my coach were in the bleachers, discussing my next routine. I built up speed, heading into a fan spiral, when it happened. My blade caught. My leg buckled. I hit the ice hard. Everything went dark.
The plane’s landing gear screeched, snapping me back to the present. My heart raced, the memory fading like smoke. As the plane stopped, passengers scrambled for their bags. I waited, letting them pass, before grabbing my things. The crutches in my hands were cold, unfamiliar. I used to glide effortlessly across the ice, and now, here I was—struggling just to stay upright on solid ground.
At baggage claim, I stared at the mountain of luggage, feeling the weight of it all sink in. How was I supposed to manage with no free hands?
“You need a hand?”
The voice startled me. I turned and saw him—tall, with warm brown eyes that somehow felt like they saw right through me. Before I could respond, someone bumped into me, and my crutch clattered to the floor. I wobbled, reaching out to steady myself, but he was faster. He caught me.
For a moment, the noise, the crowd, everything blurred. It was just us, frozen in time.
“You alright?” His voice was soft, steady, his hands still gripping my arms. I nodded, heat flushing my face as I pulled away.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks.” I muttered. He bent down, picking up my crutch. As he handed it back, his eyes lingered on me, not with pity, but with something else. Understanding, maybe.
“No problem.” His smile was easy, casual, but there was something behind it, like he had more to say.
Around us, life resumed its frantic pace—people rushing by, voices bouncing off the airport’s high ceilings. But for just a second longer, it was still only us.
“Need help with your bags?” he asked, glancing at the heap of luggage. 
I hesitated, my pride prickling. “I’ve got it,” I said, even though I clearly didn’t. My knee throbbed in protest.
He didn’t push. Just smiled, unbothered, and shrugged. “Alright. But it’s no trouble if you change your mind.”
As I shifted my weight, feeling the twinge in my leg, I sighed. “Okay, yeah, I could use some help.” The words tasted like defeat, but he didn’t seem to notice.
He easily grabbed my suitcase, balancing my smaller bag on top. I clung to my messenger bag, determined to carry something myself.
"Is someone picking you up?" he asked as we walked toward the sliding glass doors, the cold Michigan air sneaking in like a thief in the night.
"No, I'll just grab a cab," I said, weaving through the crowd. His presence next to me felt steady, comforting, like a life raft I didn’t even know I needed. 
“I’ve got my car in the overnight lot,” he offered casually, like it was no big deal. “I could give you a ride if you want.”
For a moment, I hesitated, caught off guard by the offer. “No, it’s okay,” I said, almost too quickly. “A cab’s fine.” But something shifted in his face—just for a second. Disappointment? Or was that just my imagination?
We stepped outside, and the cold hit me like a slap, sharp and biting. I cursed under my breath for not grabbing my gloves. 
He noticed, his lips quirking up in a knowing smile. “Forgot what Michigan feels like in January?”
“Yeah,” I muttered, pulling my coat tighter. “Something like that.” I should’ve been used to it by now. I grew up on ice, for God’s sake. But standing there in the freezing wind felt different, like the cold wasn’t just outside—it was creeping inside me, gnawing at the edges of something deeper.
“So, where were you before this?” he asked, his curiosity genuine, his breath hanging in the air like smoke.
“Nevada. Before that, Colorado. We moved around a lot.” I don’t even know why I was telling him this. I didn’t even know his name.
“We?” He raised an eyebrow, the question soft, but pointed.
“Me and my mom,” I said, my voice quieter now. “She’s never been one to stay put. Wherever she went, I followed.”
He nodded, like he understood more than he should. “A modern-day nomad. Sounds... exhausting.”
I let out a small laugh, more out of habit than anything else. “Yeah, it can be.” But there was something easy about him, something that made this whole conversation feel less strange, less fleeting.
“You staying here for a while?” he asked, his dark eyes locking with mine, the cold forgotten for a moment.
“For the foreseeable future,” I replied, surprising myself with how easily the words slipped out.
“Good to know.” His voice softened, like he was letting me in on some secret only we shared. That crooked smile crept back, and I felt my pulse quicken again. He had no idea what he was doing to me.
I bit my lip, trying to steady the rush of nerves rising in my chest. What was I even doing? Standing here, flirting with a stranger in the dead of winter? This wasn’t real life—it was the stuff of daydreams. But somehow, with him, it felt real. Almost too real.
“Maybe I’ll see you around,” he said, his hand lifting to ruffle his hair again. The messy strands fell back into place like he didn’t care—like he knew exactly how disheveled he looked and leaned into it.
“Yeah, maybe,” I said, though I wasn’t sure I believed it. The airport, the cold wind—it all seemed to fade away, leaving just us in this strange, fleeting moment.
“You live nearby?” I asked, even though I knew I should’ve been hopping into a cab by now, getting out of this freezing wind and back to whatever was left of my life.
“Detroit,” he said, his breath fogging in the air like a ghost of something lost.
“Me too,” I said, a little too quickly. “Just moved there, actually.”
“Downtown?” He asked it casually, but his eyes were sharp, as if my answer might mean more than I realized.
“Royal Oak,” I said, nodding. “The old houses there... they’re beautiful.”
“They are,” he agreed, and there was something in the way he said it, like he was noticing things I didn’t even realize I was showing. His gaze flicked between my eyes and my lips, and for a moment, the air between us stretched thin, a fragile thread pulling us closer until a sharp gust of wind snapped it, jolting me back to reality.
"Welcome to Michigan," he said with a laugh, his voice warm against the icy air. Without warning, he reached down and took my bare hands in his. The warmth of his touch jolted through me, electric, racing straight to my core. For a second, I swore the ground shifted beneath us. Something unspoken buzzed between our hands.
“We should get you a cab,” he said, glancing down at my frozen fingers, his expression softening with concern. “You’re not exactly dressed for this weather.”
"Yeah, I probably should’ve planned better,” I admitted with a laugh, still caught up in the warmth of his hands, the way they made everything else feel just a little less cold. 
He waved down a cab with the ease of someone who’s done it a hundred times. I watched him as he loaded my bags into the trunk, every movement feeling like a countdown. And then, when he opened the passenger door for me, I hesitated. I stood at the edge of that moment, torn between the part of me that wanted to leave and the part that wanted to stay, just a little longer.
“Thanks for the help,” I said, looking up at him, my heart thudding hard in my chest.
“Jungkook,” he said, his voice soft, that crooked smile still tugging at his lips. “I’m Jungkook.”
“Y/N,” I replied, the name slipping out of my mouth so naturally it felt like it was meant for him, like it was always supposed to be said here, in this cold, surreal moment.
“Y/N,” he repeated, like he was testing it on his tongue, like it was something fragile and precious. He leaned in just a little, his voice dropping to a whisper.
"Y/N?" His hand hovered near my shoulder, his voice even quieter now, almost as if he was about to share a secret meant only for me.
And suddenly, the world around us—everything—fell away. The cold, the noise, the blur of people rushing past. It was just him, standing there with that crooked grin, making me wonder if maybe—just maybe—this wasn’t the end of whatever this was.
“Yeah, Jungkook?” I asked, my breath catching, anticipation curling low in my stomach.
“My friends and I... we hang out at this bar on Grand most Tuesdays. Billy’s?” He said it like a suggestion, but it felt like more. Like a bridge to whatever might come next. “Maybe I’ll see you there sometime?”
A thrill shot through me, quick and unexpected. This wasn’t just some random, fleeting connection. He wanted to see me again. “Yeah,” I stammered, my voice barely steady. “I could swing by. Once I’m settled in.”
“Great.” His whole face lit up, and it was like watching a door creak open, revealing something softer, something vulnerable underneath. "I’ll see you around then, Y/N." He stepped back, shut the door behind me with a quiet finality.
As the cab pulled away, I turned, craning for one last look. He waved, easy and casual, and I lifted my hand in return, my heart still racing. Part of me wanted to freeze this moment, hold onto it before it slipped away. But the cab turned the corner, and just like that, he was gone.
I slumped back in the seat, exhaustion settling in like a heavy weight. I rested my head against the cold window, letting the chill ground me. This wasn’t just some daydream—it was real. And yet, as the city lights blurred by, doubts started creeping in, shadows curling at the edges of my mind. Would I really show up at Billy’s? Or would I let this whole thing fade, convincing myself it was just a fluke? 
But then I thought about him—Jungkook. That crooked smile. And a small part of me couldn’t help but wonder... What if?
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Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!
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fics-lovebot · 4 months ago
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bts fic recs
main masterlist
· · ♡ · · tysm to the amazing creative minds of the writers for giving me sevaral moments of joy reading your creations
i´ll be constantly updating this list so make sure to check it out often for new recs
pls remember to reblog if you like any of my recs❤️
divider creds: @notaorbital & @v6que
LAST UPDATED: 14/11/2024
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here you can find jungkook ´s m.list
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poly / ot7
love octagon? - ( @whyse7vn ) this was just too funny to me fsdfhsd, i always read it when a want to lift my mood
lovesick - ( @angelicyoongie ) yandere ot7, soulmate au, stalking, harrasment, you got 7 soulmates you don´t know about the you deff know about you, this is an on going series, hopefully i´ll be updated soon bc i loved it
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seokjin
tba
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yoongi
yoongi joins you in your bath and you talk about your days - ( @borathae) fluffy, vampire!yoongs, this is so wholesome :(
bewitched - ( @borathae) smut, fluff, vamp!yoongi, witch!reader, you put a spell on him so he cant cum till you say so, ON MY SOUL I FELT THIS ALL THE WAY TO MY TOES, the smut is gewwwd and the fluff is amazing ughhh, loved it
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namjoon
namjoon loves creampies - ( @euphoricfilter ) smut obv, he is an ASS gUY as he shouldd, he luvs him some reverse cowgirl position, obssesed with watching cum dripping outta you, he´s just laying there thinking nasty stuff while watching you ride or die, its TEW MUCHHH
belly bulge -( @euphoricfilter ) ,,,,,do you even have to ask what this is about?, ITS A LOT GOING ONNNNNN, talking about big beeffy thick wide strong bear built namjoon and his big ol dicc, who wouldnt like this??, he jerks himself off throught your stomach...
forg_tful - ( @joon4eva ) established relationship, angstt, fluff, this one makes me cry every tIMEEEE, he forgets something important for the 2394823948th time so reader thinks he just doesn´t care, he doesn´t like being away from her :((((, but he owns it up bc he is a grown mature emotionally stable man, we love it
love language - ( @rmnamjoons ) soulmate au, mute!reader, non idol au. THE FLUFF IS BEAUTIFULLLLLLL, i love joons pov before meeting her, and the day the meet???? i died, it was so cute
blushes from a rose - ( @army-author ) fluff, supernatural au, popular witch!namjoon, shy forest nymph!reader, so like,,i need a movie of this asap
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tba
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split - ( @sombreboy ) smut, snake hybrid!jimin, he has a fORKED tongue and TWO cocks!!!! :D NOW THIS, i remember reading it a long time ago and thinking it was the best hybrid!jimin fic out there, i´ve read about him being a cat, a dog, etc but a SNAKE??? now that´s new, loved it
faded love - ( @jamaisjoons ) angst, fluff, cheating husband!jimin, ceo!jimin. "he doesn’t need to say it. because you can feel your husband, park jimin, falling out of love with you." ANGST FESSSTTTT, another one for my personal collection, i love this sm
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devotion - ( @borathae) smut, vampire!tae, period sex, multiple orgasms, period blood licking, its a LOT GOING ON I- wow, pls just read it
These Things Take Time - ( @laughing-with-god ) yandere! supernatural tae, gaslighting, gore, horror, ex bf jimin, this is written so well , ghost? tae but not really, doppleganger kinda thing, loved it
let love be enough - ( @jingabitch ) ex-husband!tae, cheater!tae, divorce au, you meet again after 20 years on your daughter´s wedding. YUPPP this is an angst fest right here, probably my favorite tae angsty fic out there, i LOVE IT
the curse of a crush - ( @army-author ) fluff, supernatural au, down bad witch!taehyung, witch!reader, he´s so in love with you he thinks you´ve cursed him with a love potion, SO CUTEEE
436 notes · View notes
divinelyparkjimin · 6 months ago
Text
— taste of you [m] | pjm.
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◦ summary ↠ getting yourself off to your childhood friend’s sexual escapades was definitely not on your radar, but seems like it should’ve been a long time ago.
◦ pairing ↠ jimin x reader
◦ word count ↠ 5.2k
◦ genre ↠ smut, fluff, angst-ish
◦ content warning(s) ↠ fuckboy!jimin, childhood friends to lovers, roommate au, suggestive/explicit content, dirty talk, thigh riding, penetrative sex, ejaculation, f. and m. orgasm, oral sex, fingering, vouyerism (?), masturbation, alcohol consumption
a/n: i put together another one for you guys! hope you enjoy <3
masterlist
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Sitting on the couch in the living room, you held a book in your lap, though you hadn't turned a page in the past twenty minutes. The soft glow of the late morning sun filtered through the sheer curtains, casting a warm light on the cozy apartment. The space was a blend of both you and your roommate, Jimin’s, personalities: your collection of plants thriving in the corners, and Jimin's eclectic mix of posters and musical instruments scattered about. A framed photo of the two of you at your high school graduation hung on the wall, a reminder of the years you had shared.
Your eyes kept drifting to the hallway, waiting for the inevitable sound of Jimin's bedroom door opening. The apartment was unusually quiet this morning, the calm before the storm. Sure enough, the door creaked open, and you heard the soft, murmured goodbyes. A minute later, a petite, pretty brunette emerged, looking slightly disheveled but clearly satisfied. She glanced at you with a polite nod, her high heels clicking softly against the hardwood floor as she made her way to the front door. The scent of her perfume lingered in the air, mixing with the aroma of fresh coffee.
Jimin followed shortly after, wearing his usual post-hookup grin. His dark hair was tousled, and his t-shirt was slightly wrinkled. There was a certain smugness in his stride that was both infuriating and oddly endearing. He stopped in the doorway, leaning casually against the frame, his eyes twinkling with mischief.
"Another one, huh?" you quipped, raising an eyebrow as you set your book aside. "Didn't you have a girl over just last night? What’s going on, Jimin? Suddenly in heat after being a big ‘ol virgin in high school?"
Jimin chuckled, running a hand through his messy hair. "Guess I'm making up for lost time," he said, flashing you a playful wink.
You shook your head, unable to keep the smirk off your face. "Never thought I'd see the day. The shy boy next door turned playboy extraordinaire. What happened to you?"
He shrugged, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "People change, you know."
As he sauntered into the kitchen, you followed, trying to ignore the flutter in your stomach. The kitchen was bright and airy, with sunlight streaming through the large windows. The small dining table where the two of you often shared meals was cluttered with the remnants of breakfast: an empty cereal bowl, a half-finished cup of coffee, and a plate with crumbs. Jimin moved to the coffee maker, his back muscles rippling under his shirt as he poured himself a cup.
"You sure you're okay with this?" he asked, turning to face you, his expression suddenly serious. "I mean, if it's bothering you, I can tone it down."
You forced a laugh, waving off his concern. "It's fine, Jimin. We're adults. You can do what you want."
But the truth was, it wasn’t fine. The more you tried to brush it off, the harder it became to ignore the growing tension inside you. Each night, as the sounds from his room filled the apartment, you found it increasingly difficult to sleep. The moans, the bed creaking, the unmistakable intimacy—it all sent a shiver down your spine, making your cheeks flush and your heart race. You’d lay there, staring at the ceiling, trying to push the images forming in your mind aside. But the curiosity and arousal were impossible to ignore. You started seeing Jimin in a way you never had before, wondering what it would be like to be one of those girls.
Mornings became a minefield of awkward encounters. You’d bump into his overnight guests in the kitchen, exchanging polite smiles and trying to mask your discomfort. Jimin, for his part, seemed oblivious to your internal struggle. He would flash you his usual bright smile, completely unaware of the turmoil he was causing within you.
One morning, as you poured yourself a cup of coffee, you couldn’t help but steal glances at the girl Jimin had brought home the night before. She was stunning, with perfect hair and a confident air that made you feel oddly inadequate. You wondered what Jimin saw in her, and whether he had ever looked at you the same way. The thought sent a pang of jealousy through you, but you quickly shoved it aside, forcing yourself to act normal.
This newfound awareness of Jimin’s sexual escapades was driving you crazy. You found yourself unable to concentrate on anything, your mind constantly drifting back to the sounds and sights that had become a part of your nightly routine. The more you tried to ignore it, the stronger the feelings grew.
As the days passed, your curiosity began to flourish further and further towards lust, which it was already quite a lot of. You started paying more attention to Jimin, noticing the way his muscles flexed when he moved, the way his eyes sparkled when he laughed, the way his voice deepened when he spoke to his conquests. You were seeing him in a completely new light, and it was both exhilarating and terrifying.
That evening, after a particularly loud night of giggles and thumping from Jimin's room, you found yourself in the kitchen, brewing a pot of chamomile tea in a desperate attempt to calm your nerves. The door to Jimin’s room opened, and you heard soft footsteps approaching. You stiffened, your heart rate picking up as Jimin entered the kitchen, shirtless and looking annoyingly perfect despite the late hour.
“Can’t sleep?” he asked, leaning casually against the counter.
“Yeah, something like that,” you replied, trying to keep your voice steady.
He grinned, clearly oblivious to the turmoil he was causing. “Didn’t mean to keep you up,” he said, his tone teasing. “Or maybe I did,” he added with a wink.
You rolled your eyes, though a small part of you couldn't help but appreciate the sight of him. “You’re impossible, Jimin.”
He stepped closer, and you could smell the faint scent of his cologne mixed with something uniquely him. “You know, if you ever need a distraction…” he started, his voice dropping to a low, seductive tone.
Your breath hitched. “Don’t joke about that,” you said, more harshly than you intended.
He looked taken aback, his playful expression fading. “Hey, I was just kidding. Are you okay?”
You sighed, turning away to pour your tea. “I’m fine, Jimin. Just tired.”
But you weren’t fine. You were far from fine, a potent mix of jealousy and desire taking root within you. It was like your body had a mind of its own, going into heat anytime you’d cross paths with him.
It felt strange to you, considering this was the boy you’d grown up with for such a huge portion of your life. You’d been by his side when he was an ultra nerd, when he wouldn’t dare make a move on a single girl. You’d never imagined you could ever see him as more than that, but here you were.
“Jimin, can I ask you something?” You felt your heart skip a beat.
“Anything,” he replied, his expression soft.
“Why do you do it?” you asked, surprising even yourself with the question. “All the girls, I mean.”
He seemed to ponder this for a moment, then shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s just…easy, I guess. No strings, no complications.”
You looked at him, trying to keep your voice steady. “But isn’t it lonely? Doesn’t it make you feel empty?”
Jimin shrugged, a nonchalant smile on his face. “Not really. I’m just having fun, you know?”
Your chest tightened, but you kept your tone light. “You’re not as invincible as you think you are, you know. One day, you’re going to meet someone who makes you want to risk everything.”
He laughed, shaking his head. “Maybe, but I’m not worried about that right now. I’m just taking things as they come.”
You nodded, though your mind was far from at ease. “I hope you find what you’re looking for, Jimin.”
He gave you a casual smile. “Thanks. And hey, don’t worry about me. I’m doing just fine.”
You forced a smile in return. “Yeah, I know. Just take care of yourself.”
And with that, you returned to your room, plunging onto the soft cotton sheets that covered your bed. The memory of his teasing words lingered in your mind. “You know, if you ever need a distraction…” His voice had dropped to a low, seductive tone, and though you’d laughed it off at the time, the suggestion had planted a seed in your mind.
Alone in the dim light of your room, your thoughts wandered back to Jimin. You couldn’t deny the magnetic pull you felt towards him, the way your body reacted to his touch, his voice, his presence. You found yourself imagining what it would be like to take him up on his offer, to let him distract you in the most intimate way.
Your hand drifted down your body, your breath hitching as you let your fantasies take over. You imagined the feel of his strong, thick thighs under you, the way they would flex and shift as you rode them. The thought made your pulse quicken, and you let out a soft sigh, your fingers tracing lazy circles over your skin.
In your mind, you could see Jimin’s intense gaze, feel his hands on your hips, guiding you. The way his muscles would ripple under your touch, the low growl of his voice as he whispered your name. You imagined the way his thighs would feel beneath you, strong and steady, the friction igniting every nerve in your body.
Your breathing grew heavier, your movements more urgent as you lost yourself in the fantasy. The thought of being with Jimin, of feeling him in such an intimate way, sent waves of pleasure through you. You could almost hear his voice, feel his breath against your skin, the heat of his body enveloping you.
It wasn’t long before your fantasies reached their peak, your body trembling with release. You lay there for a moment, catching your breath, your mind still filled with images of Jimin. The intensity of your desire surprised you, and you couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like to turn your fantasies into reality.
The next weekend, Jimin knocked on your bedroom door, poking his head in with a grin. “Hey, you got any plans tonight?”
You looked up from your book, raising an eyebrow. “Not really. Why?”
“I’m heading to the club with some friends,” he said, stepping inside. “You should come with us.”
You shook your head, laughing softly. “You know I’m not into that scene, Jimin. I’m fine here.”
He walked over to your bed, sitting on the edge. “Come on, you’re always sitting at home. One night out won’t kill you. It’ll be fun, I promise.”
You sighed, setting your book aside. “I don’t know. I wouldn’t know what to do there.”
Jimin smiled, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “Just let loose for once. Dance, have a few drinks, and enjoy yourself. I’ll be there with you the whole time.”
You hesitated, biting your lip. “I’m really not sure. It’s not my thing.”
“Please,” he said, giving you his best puppy-dog eyes. “Do it for me? I hate seeing you cooped up all the time.”
You couldn’t help but laugh at his expression. “Alright, alright. I’ll go. But if it gets too much, I’m leaving.”
“Deal,” Jimin said, standing up and pulling you to your feet. “You won’t regret it, I promise.”
You rolled your eyes playfully. “I better not.”
As you got ready, you felt a mix of excitement and nerves. Jimin was right—you rarely went out, and maybe it was time to change that. You put on a nice outfit, something that made you feel confident, and met Jimin in the living room.
“Ready?” he asked, smiling warmly at you.
“Ready,” you replied, feeling a flutter of anticipation in your stomach.
With Jimin by your side, you set out for the club, wondering what the night had in store.
The music was loud, the lights were dazzling, and the drinks were flowing. After a few shots, you felt more relaxed, the alcohol dulling your inhibitions. Jimin stayed close to you all night, dancing and laughing in a way that made you feel like you were the only two people in the room.
The club was packed, a sea of bodies moving to the throbbing bass that reverberated through the air. Flashing lights painted the room in hues of blue and red, creating an almost hypnotic atmosphere. You and Jimin had already downed a few shots, the alcohol buzzing warmly through your veins, making everything feel a little more vibrant and a lot less restrained.
You found yourselves on the dance floor, pressed close together by the throng of people. The music pounded around you, a sultry beat that seemed to dictate the movements of your bodies. Jimin's hands found your hips, pulling you against him, and you didn't resist. You’d never felt his touch in a way so intimate before. The feel of his body so close to yours was electrifying, and you let the music take over, swaying in perfect rhythm with him.
Jimin’s breath was hot against your ear as he leaned in to speak, his voice barely audible over the music. “You’re a really good dancer,” he murmured, his lips brushing against your skin.
You shivered, pressing closer to him. “So are you,” you replied, feeling bolder than usual. The alcohol had stripped away your inhibitions, leaving you more daring and less concerned about the consequences.
As the song changed to something even more sensual, Jimin's hands roamed a bit more, sliding up and down your sides, occasionally grazing the small of your back. Each touch sent a jolt through you, making your heart race. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him even closer, your bodies moving as one.
Your faces were inches apart now, and you could see the intensity in Jimin's eyes. There was something different about the way he looked at you tonight—something that made your pulse quicken and your breath hitch. His eyes flickered to your lips, and for a moment, you thought he might kiss you right there on the dance floor.
“You’re driving me crazy,” he whispered, his voice husky and filled with something you couldn’t quite identify—desire, perhaps, or something even deeper.
“Good,” you whispered back, the word escaping before you could think better of it.
The tension between you was palpable, a current that made every touch, every brush of skin against skin, feel like a spark. You weren’t sure how much longer you could stand it. The alcohol had dulled your fears but sharpened your desires, and all you wanted was to close the small gap between you and feel his lips on yours.
Jimin seemed to feel the same way. His grip on your waist tightened, and he leaned in even closer, his lips almost touching your ear. “You wanna head back?” he suggested, his voice barely more than a breath. “It’s feeling a little stuffy in here.” You nodded, simply wanting to be alone with him. You quickly bid your friends goodbye, before taking off.
Jimin took your hand in his, leading you through the crowd and out of the club, the cool night air hitting you like a shock after the heat of the dance floor. The tension between you was still there, simmering just below the surface.
The ride home in the Uber had been a blur, the tension between you growing with each passing second. You both sat close, his leg pressed against yours, the occasional brush of his hand against your thigh sending sparks through your body. You exchanged lingering glances, the desire in his eyes reflecting your own.
Back at the apartment, the door had barely closed behind you before Jimin was on you again, his hands on your waist as he backed you against the wall. The electricity between you crackled in the air, making every nerve in your body stand on end.
“You have no idea what you do to me,” he murmured, his voice low and intense as he looked into your eyes.
You shivered, pressing closer to him. “I think I’m starting to get an idea,” you replied, breathless.
He leaned in, capturing your lips in a kiss that was both tender and hungry, as if he had been waiting for this moment forever. You kissed him back with equal fervor, your hands tangling in his hair as you pulled him closer.
The kiss deepened, growing more intense as the pent-up tension between you finally found release. His hands roamed your body, sending shivers down your spine with every touch. You could feel the heat radiating off him, matching the fire that burned inside you.
Just as things were escalating, Jimin suddenly pulled back, breathing heavily. “I can’t do this,” he said, his voice strained.
You blinked, trying to process his words. “What’s wrong?” you asked, your heart sinking.
He shook his head, running a hand through his hair. “I don’t think I can do this with you.”
“What are you talking about?” you asked, your heart sinking at his words as your throat grew tight. “You do this all the time. Why is it any different with me?”
Jimin sighed, looking tormented. “Because it’s not the same. It’s... it’s different.”
You felt a mix of anger and sadness rising. “Different how? Were you not liking it?”
“No, it’s not that,” he said quickly, reaching for your hand. “I just… really care about you. And I don’t want to just have a quick, meaningless hookup with you.”
His confession left you stunned. “What do you mean?” you whispered, your voice trembling.
“I thought sleeping around would make it easier to stop thinking about you, but it’s never felt right.” Jimin took a deep breath, his voice tinged with regret. “I can’t treat it like you’re just another girl because you’re not. I’ve always wanted it to be you, but I knew I didn’t really stand a chance.”
You felt a lump in your throat, tears welling in your eyes. “So you’ve been avoiding me because you care about me?”
He nodded, looking both vulnerable and relieved. “Yes. I know it sounds messed up, but I didn’t know how else to deal with it. I didn’t want to ruin what we have.”
You took a step closer, your heart pounding. “Jimin, I want you too. I know I said it didn’t bother me, but it’s honestly been driving me insane. I couldn’t help but feel jealous whenever you’d bring all the girls in, you know?”
His eyes widened with surprise and relief. “You did?”
You nodded, feeling a mixture of hope and longing. “Yes. I wanted you, Jimin. I still do.”
The air between you crackled with unspoken desire as you closed the gap between you, your lips meeting in a kiss that was filled with all the emotions you had kept bottled up. This time, it wasn’t just about lust��it was about love and longing, and the connection you both craved.
As the kiss deepened, you felt Jimin’s hands on your back, pulling you closer. This time, there was no hesitation, no holding back. You both knew what you wanted. Jimin slipped his firm hands beneath your thighs, lifting you up in a swift movement, keeping his lips connected to yours. You locked your legs around his torso, arms placed around his neck.
His lips felt perfect against your own, the pillowy feeling of them pulling you deeper into the moment. You gasped for air every now and then, but were not given much of a break before the two of you were at it again, more passionate than before. Your fingers traced along the back of his neck as you were buried in each other’s faces, occasionally gripping at his hair.
“F-Fuck Y/N, I’ve wanted this so bad,” Jimin croaked, heavy breaths escaping his lips.
“Trust me, I have too.” You chuckled, pecking his nose before going back into his lips. You found yourself sucking on his bottom lip and had each other’s tongues periodically crossing the barriers between the two of you.
Jimin placed his hands at your ass, as if for a better grip on you, before carrying you over to his bedroom. The journey there was a shaky one, as neither of you could seem to separate from basking in the feelings of one another. Upon arrival, he set you on his bed, before pulling off his shirt and crawling atop you.
Your eyes followed him with delight, staring up at him with doe eyes that he couldn’t help but grin at.
“God, you’re so cute.” Jimin’s hand rose up to touch your face, his large thumb swiping along your cheek. He pecked the same spot, sending shivers down your spine. He then leaned back, his eyes taking in your form with a mix of admiration and desire.
Slowly, you tugged at the hem of your own shirt, pulling it over your head and tossing it aside. Jimin's eyes darkened as he took in the sight of you, and his hands quickly followed, exploring the newly exposed skin. His touch was both gentle and possessive, making your body arch into him with every caress.
Jimin's lips traveled down your neck, leaving a trail of hot kisses that made you shiver. He nipped at your collarbone, eliciting a gasp from you as his hands roamed over your curves. You felt his fingers fumble with the clasp of your bra, and within moments, it was discarded, leaving you bare to his hungry gaze.
“Beautiful,” he murmured against your skin, his lips finding their way to your breasts. He took his time, savoring each kiss and lick, driving you wild with need. Your hands roamed over his toned back, feeling his muscles flex beneath your touch as he continued his ministrations.
You couldn’t wait any longer. Your hands traveled down his torso, fingers tracing the lines of his abs before reaching the waistband of his jeans. You fumbled with the button, your eagerness evident as you finally managed to undo it. Jimin chuckled softly, a sound filled with both amusement and anticipation.
“Eager, aren’t we?” he teased, but his voice was thick with desire. He helped you with the rest, quickly shedding his jeans and boxers. The sight of him, fully naked and aroused, sent a jolt of anticipation through you.
He leaned back down, capturing your lips in a searing kiss as his hands made quick work of removing the last of your clothing. Now, with nothing between you, the heat of his body against yours was almost overwhelming. You could feel the evidence of his desire pressing against you, making your own arousal spike.
Jimin’s hand slid between your thighs, his fingers teasing your entrance before slipping inside.
“Fuck, you’re tight,” he muttered. “I guess you really haven’t gotten any in a while.” A sly smirk appeared on his face as your face turned into a face of shock.
“Hey—!” you began, before you were cut off by his hand covering your mouth.
“Shh,” Jimin whispered, his eyes darkening with desire. “Let me take care of you.”
You moaned into his mouth as he pressed further against your g-spots. Your hips bucked against his hand as he worked you with skilled, deliberate movements. Every touch, every stroke, brought you closer to the edge. His fingers thrusted inside you, curling to hit that perfect spot that made your vision blur even harder.
Your moans grew louder, the sound filling the room as your body tensed, every muscle tightening in anticipation. Jimin’s other hand slid up your body, cupping your breast and rolling your nipple between his fingers, adding another layer of sensation to the mix.
“Jimin, I’m so close,” you panted, your hips moving in time with his thrusts, chasing the climax that was just out of reach. He bit down gently on your earlobe, his breath hot and ragged in your ear.
“Come for me, baby. I want to feel you,” he growled.
The combination of his words, his touch, and the raw intensity in his eyes left you pooled with desperation. Your orgasm hit you with a force that left you breathless, your body convulsing around his fingers as waves of pleasure crashed over you. You cried out his name, your nails digging into his back as you rode out the climax.
Jimin didn’t stop, continuing to pump his fingers inside you, prolonging your pleasure until you were a quivering mess beneath him. When he finally pulled his hand away, he brought his fingers to his lips, licking them clean with a satisfied smirk.
“God, you taste amazing,” he said, his eyes dark with lust as he looked down at you. You were still catching your breath, your body humming with the aftershocks of your orgasm.
“Jimin,” you breathed, reaching up to pull him down into a kiss. Your tongues tangled together, the taste of yourself on his lips adding to the intimate connection between you.
He pulled back slightly, resting his forehead against yours. “Ready for more?” he asked, his voice a low, seductive murmur.
You nodded, your heart racing with anticipation. “Always,” you whispered, your body already aching for his touch again.
It was not long before his lips were back in contact with your skin, trailing kisses down your body which left a scorching path from your neck to your navel. Every touch sent shivers through you, your skin tingling with anticipation. When he reached your thighs, he gently spread them apart, positioning himself between them.
“Jimin…” you breathed, your voice barely a whisper. The sight of him, his eyes locked onto yours with such intensity, made your heart race.
“I’ve always wondered what you’d taste like,” he murmured, his tone laced with eagerness. He leaned in closer, his tongue flicking out to taste you. The sensation made you gasp, your hips bucking involuntarily.
“God, you’re perfect,” he groaned, his hands gripping your thighs to hold you in place as he continued his exploration. His tongue moved with expert precision, each stroke sending waves of pleasure through you. He sucked gently on your clit, making your head spin and your breath come in ragged gasps.
“Jimin, please,” you begged, your fingers tangling in his hair as you tried to pull him closer. The need for release was overwhelming, every nerve in your body on fire.
He looked up at you, his eyes filled with lust and satisfaction. “Not yet, baby. I want to make you feel everything.”
As the intensity between you reached its peak, you felt a surge of boldness wash over you. Breaking away from the kiss, you looked up at Jimin with flushed cheeks and a determined gleam in your eyes.
"Jimin," you breathed, your voice barely more than a whisper, "I want to ride your thigh."
His eyes widened in surprise, but a smirk quickly spread across his lips. "Hell yeah," he replied, his voice husky with seduction. “I didn’t know you were into that.”
You straddled his thigh, feeling the heat of his skin against yours as you positioned yourself just right. With a shaky breath, you began to move, your hips rolling against him in slow motions.
The friction was exquisite, sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body with each movement. Jimin's hands roamed your curves, guiding you as you found a rhythm that drove you both wild.
You threw your head back, letting out a low moan as the pleasure built to an almost unbearable level. Jimin's thigh provided the perfect amount of pressure, hitting all the right spots and pushing you closer and closer to the edge. Despite the immense feelings of pleasure, it didn’t seem to be enough, so you wanted more.
“I need you, Jimin,” you breathed, barely able to form the words as pleasure clouded your mind.
He didn’t need any more encouragement. Aligning himself with you, he slowly pushed his length inside you, filling you completely. The sensation was both intense and intimate, making you gasp as your bodies finally joined.
Jimin set a slow, steady pace, his movements deep. Each thrust sent waves of pleasure through you, building steadily until you felt like you might burst. His lips never strayed far from yours, kissing you with a passion that matched the intensity of his movements. The familiar sound of his headboard banging against the wall filled the room as his thrusts grew rougher. It was a noise you were used to hearing from the other side of the wall, but were now able to experience for yourself.
Your hands clutched at his shoulders, your nails digging into his skin as you rode the waves of pleasure. The rhythm between you was perfect, a dance of desire and emotion that brought you closer with every thrust.
“Jimin, I’m gonna—” you cried out, unable to hold back any longer.
“Do it, Y/N. Come,” he urged, his voice a low growl.
The orgasm hit you like a tidal wave, crashing over you with an intensity that left you trembling. Your vision blurred, your mind going blank as pleasure consumed you. Jimin continued to lap at you yet again, drawing out your climax until you were completely spent. Jimin held you close, his own release mingling with yours, the connection between you deeper than it had ever been.
Finally, he pulled away, crawling back up your body to capture your lips in a slow, tender kiss. As the waves of pleasure subsided, you lay there, wrapped in each other’s arms, your bodies still entwined. Jimin pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead, his breath warm against your skin.
“That was amazing, Y/N,” he whispered, his voice filled with contentment. In that moment, everything felt perfect, the years of friendship and unspoken desire finally culminating in something beautiful.
Jimin chuckled softly, breaking the silence. “So, does this mean we can make this a regular thing?”
You laughed, playfully swatting his chest. “Are you saying you can’t get enough of me already?”
“Pretty much,” he grinned. “I don’t I could ever get enough of this.” His eyes sparkled with mischief as they drifted down the length of your body.
You smiled, feeling a warmth spread through you. “Neither do I, Jimin.”
With that, you both settled into a comfortable silence, cuddled close, bare skin against bare skin. As the night grew quieter, the rhythm of your breathing began to sync, and you found yourselves drifting off to sleep in each other’s arms.
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a/n: feel free to leave a comment or slip into my inbox to let me know what you think! feedback is always appreciated :>
masterlist
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ldysmfrst · 6 months ago
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Welcome to American Mate's Master List! The Taglist is CLOSED for this story.
This is an OT7 x Plus Sized/Chubby Reader story. The story will have Mature Scenes. The chapters with these adult themes will have (M) in the chapter name, so please 18+ readers only. Within the chapters, at the start and end of the Mature scene will be the following banner, if you want to skip them.
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The Hybrid K-pop group BTS is on tour in America; of course, things don't start out the way they should, but after an encounter with Y/n, things change but will everyone follow Fate?
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Chapter 1 - Two Weeks Early
Let's introduce you to the world of Hybrids and Playmates. It really is quite simple until a VIP Potential Client's manager walks into your office two weeks early, and it's only a skeleton crew right now.
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Chapter 2 - The Playmate Meeting
Bangtan Pack arrives at Playmate Services Inc., USA Idol Division. It's time for the pack to meet the unsigned Playmates, but things don't go as well as planned.
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Chapter 3 - Following Instincts
Dealing with the aftermath of the accident, Bangtan Pack reacts upon instincts, some more than others. Y/n learns a few new things.
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Chapter 4 - First Case of Alpha Space
Y/n may call herself a Hybrid supporter but never has she dealt with something like this. Y/n gets to see firsthand some of what an Alpha is like when they get a little lost in their instincts.
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Chapter 5 - Heated Discussions (M)
Y/n didn't want to cause trouble, but that seemed to be all she did. However, Bangtan Pack thinks sometimes the trouble is worth it.
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Chapter 6 - A Proposition for You
Things get intense for Bangtan Pack and Y/n, but not in a good way. Meeting the doctor tonight has bigger implications than Y/n thought was possible.
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Chapter 7 - Is This a Joke
After proposing to Y/n the option to become their playmate, the Bangtan Pack struggles to convince her to accept their Prime Alpha's offer. Will Y/n be persuaded or will she run from Fate unknowingly?
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Chapter 8 - Time to Tell the Family Pack (M)
While the Bangtang Pack is excited to have Y/n join as a "Play"mate, that may not be the case for her family pack.
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Chapter 9 - Shadows of the Past (M)
It becomes clear that pack dynamics can vary from pack to pack. This sometimes leads to interesting reactions. It's where the past can be seen influencing the present that will shadow all.
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Chapter 10 - A Date in the Right Direction
After the visit from Dr. Blackwell, some of the Bangtan pack start behaving differently. Is it a good thing or a bad thing? Maybe the eldest Alpha has some insight. (This chapter is Seokjin-centric in honor of his coming home from the military)
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Chapter 11 - Just a Staff Member Part 1
Chapter 11 - Just a Staff Member Part 2
Y/n stands up for someone else, and everything starts falling apart. Last night was a dream but the reality of the situation finally hits.
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Chapter 12 - Everyone Deserves a Second Chance
It's time to make a choice that can make for an adventure or change y/n's life.
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Chapter 13 - Shall we?
It's time for the date with Namjoon. Getting ready becomes more fun than you think it could be with an unexpected surprise and new friends, but what happens as the night goes on?
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Chapter 14 - Does it Always End in Ruin?
Scenting in a car with the Prime Alpha goes better than expected, but once they return to the pack house, things take a turn for Y/n.
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WARNINGS FOR CHAPTER 15! This is a heavy chapter. Please read before reading the full chapter. Thank you 💜💜💜
Chapter 15 - The Pack Meeting and Troubled Pasts
Y/n shares her history with Bangtan Pack and finds she isn't the only one with a dark family life.
As a paid member of my Patreon, you can read extra spicy smutty scenes and additional content and have early release benefits for each chapter!
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TO BE CONTINUED...
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Reader Asks
Has the Bangtan Pack been with a woman before?
How would The Bangtan Pack react to finding Y/n dancing?
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Additional Content
Meet Alpha Giant Flemish Rabbit Jungkook's Family
Patreon Artwork Poll Results (1)
American Mate (5) - Extended Scenting Scene (M)
American Mate (8) - Extended/ Additional Scene (M)
Take a look at Chapter 12, Hobi's Fire Red Suit.
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frenchkisstheabyss · 6 months ago
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♡ Sympathy for the Devil ♡
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♡ Pairings: mobster!boyfriend!jimin x chubby!fem!reader
♡ Genre: mafia au/angst/smut
♡ Summary: After an arguement with your boyfriend, you set out to get back at him by bringing a date to the restaurant he frequents on a night you know he'll be there. It's a dangerous game, toying with another human life to get your way, but you do love danger, don't you? You wouldn't be looking to make a killer jealous if you didn't.
♡ Word Count: 3.2k
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♡ Warnings: appearance of other members (non romantic), dom Jimin w/ switch vibes sprinkled in, unprotected sex, vaginal penetration, rough sex, clit teasing, marking (hickeys), pet names (baby), you're feral for each other, fingering (f receiving), spanking, you give him a lil slap, choking, bathroom sex, possessiveness, jealousy, you're both kinda psychotic, implied murder, & that's it for the list of wholesome things in this fic.
♡ A/N: I'm such a sucker for mafia movies so I have the biggest soft spot for mafia fics. I want to thank @anyamaris for reading this first and encouraging me along the way when I was struggling with writer's block. Idk what I'd do without my #1 cheerleader for my dom Jimin agenda ❤️
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Some of the prettiest animals in nature are simultaneously the deadliest. Park Jimin is no exception...
It’s impossible not to be enchanted by him. His face is a heavenly mixture of handsomeness and beauty. The cadence of his voice is like a song you can’t quite get out of your head and just when you think you have it’s back again. It’s all enough to make a girl blind to the blood on his hands.
Falling in love with him made the rest of the world all fuzzy. It blurred out everything. Not just the money laundering or the drug trafficking. To love him, to be loved by him, makes everything else feel like background noise. You've never touched a hard drug in your life but, the way he makes you feel, he must qualify as one. 
That’s why you’re here doing the dumbest shit you’ve ever done in your life.
Arguments are inevitable in relationships. But arguments when you’re dating a mob guy? They’re different beasts entirely and it’s a bitch to tame them. Your last argument with Jimin led to you packing a bag and running off to your best friend’s place. In the beginning you never had to question if you came before everything else. You were special to him—at least you thought you were—and he’d stop anything to be with you.
But lately that hasn’t been the case. He’s been replacing his presence in your life with gifts, thinking he can make up for missed dates and lonely nights with designer bags. Maybe the other girlfriends are content with cuddling up to some ugly mink coat in place of their man but you aren’t one of them. 
He just can’t seem to get that through his thick skull so you’ve set out to make him. If the death stare he’s giving you across this bustling restaurant is any indication of how your plan’s going, it’s working like a charm. You spent hours styling your hair just the way he likes it. Elegant and sleek, marrying beautifully with the softness of your face.
Your manicured nails are painted a translucent blue that deepens the slightest bit when the light hits it a certain way. The dress you’re wearing accentuates your curves in all the places he loves which, let’s be honest, is everywhere. And your heels, the heels, somehow makes your ass look more perfect than it already is. All of this and you’re sitting at a table having dinner with another man. 
You spot Namjoon throwing an arm around Jimin’s shoulder, no doubt leaning in to give him one of his infamous pep talks. "Don’t worry about her” he’s surely saying, “It’s not worth it, man. See, sometimes love is just…” Joon goes on, doing his best to keep his younger brother from doing something stupid but Jimin’s hardly listening. How can he when his blood’s boiling hot enough to eat its way through his flesh?
Every Sunday night the brothers and their girlfriends come here for dinner. The owners, a sweet elderly couple, love them as if they were their own and give them the biggest table no matter how packed it is. This is the one night they get to pretend they’re a normal family. It’s tradition and you don’t fuck with tradition. Everyone knows that. You know that. 
“The thing a lot of women don’t understand is that men by nature aren’t monogamous” your date rambles between messy bites of dinner. The man’s not ugly by any means but god is he a pig, in more ways than one. Not that you’re complaining. It’s why you had your best friend set you up with him. Whoever you bought here was no doubt being led to slaughter. Who better than a pig?
A chill runs through you at the ruthlessness of your own thoughts, wiping the smile from your face. Looking up, Jimin captures you in his gaze, the death glare replaced with a look of childlike amusement. It’s as if the smile had fled from your face to find its new home on his, taunting you from afar. What’s he smiling for? You’re not foolish enough to think it’s for anything good. 
“I was thinking, it’s kinda loud in here. Wanna go to my place?” your date asks, his poor attempt at getting laid tonight falling on deaf ears.
Jimin stands up, slipping out of his suit jacket as he does so. Rolling up the sleeves of his pressed dress shirt, he leans to whisper something in Yoongi’s ear. Yoongi pours him a shot and he knocks it back like it’s nothing. The rest of the table watches on, concerned but doing their best to carry on dinner as usual. Their collective heart rate increases but none more than yours.
Maybe you hadn’t really thought this one out. Noticing the color drain from your face, your date reaches out to touch your hand. “Don’t!” you snap, jumping up from your seat. “I’m sorry. I just need a second.”  Jimin’s halfway across the dining room when you flee toward the bathroom, nearly knocking into some poor innocent waiter in the process. 
Navigating your way through the halls, you scramble to find a way out. You’ll tell the guy you’re sick. That’s it. Say you’re not feeling too well, must be the food or something, and send him on his way. Pretend this never happened.
“Beautiful dress, darling” an older woman smiles as she leaves the bathroom. You dash in before the door closes behind her, peeking your head back out to avoid being rude. “Thank you!” you shout after her, quickly shutting the door and hurrying to the sink to splash some water on your face.
“Snap out of it” you whisper, flicking specks of icy water at the makeup you worked tirelessly to apply. “Maybe…maybe he won’t do anything, right? We’re in public. He wouldn’t—” You force a weak, pained smile at the girl staring back at you in the mirror. “Who are you kidding?” you groan, burying your face in your hands, “He’s gonna kill him.”
“But you knew that already, didn’t you?” sighs a voice that is distinctively not yours. Your hands drop from your face and there Jimin is, standing in the doorway with that same smile on. The one he’d so brutally ripped from your face. And here you are, shivering like a child too afraid of the monster under the bed to make a run for it. 
In all your panic you could’ve sworn you locked the door when, in fact, you’d done no such thing. If he’d knocked you would’ve had to open it anyway—you’ve never been great at saying no to him—but at least you would’ve given yourself a fighting chance. Nothing to stress your pretty little head about. Jimin steps in, easing the door closed, and you hear a sharp click. It’s locked now.
The heels of his black Louboutin shoes tap against the polished tile as he approaches the sink. Your heart jumps with each tap, the sound growing unbearably louder the closer he gets. Jimin brings his arms around your waist, holding you as only lovers do, “You want me to hurt him, don’t you? Want me to break every bone in his body to show you how much I love you?” His full lips brush against your neck, soft tongue running along the surface of your skin like the head of a match ready to light up with dazzling flames.
Your eyes are glued to the mirror, watching helplessly as his hands skate up and down your body, fingertips ghosting your most sensitive areas. His touch is a truth serum, forcing you to betray yourself and lay your motives bare. “You protect the things you love, Jimin. I only wanted to know if I was still one of them. Even if that meant…” you shudder at the thought. “We get what we want by any means. That’s what you taught me, isn’t it?” 
Jimin grins, locking eyes with your reflection as he inches your dress up to reveal your pillowy thighs. “Aah but you already have me. I let you throw your little tantrum but I’ll never let you go. You know that.” His fingers dip between the warmth of your thighs, teasing your clit through your panties.
“So why?” he whispers, his other hand coming up to lovingly stroke your neck, “Why would you try to embarrass me?”
You part your lips to speak but your words are forced back down by the sudden pressure applied to your windpipe by his hand. All that escapes are broken words and hushed gasps for air. The light abandons his eyes, that boyish charm he so effortlessly wields burning to ash as you squirm in his grip. You kick your legs to get free but it only serves to give him the room he needs to tear your panties to the side, the pads of his fingertips dripping with your arousal as they glide through your folds.
He loosens his grip on your neck and you manage to rasp out “Mmm…sorry…didn’t mean” before you’re plunged back into silence. Curling his fingers against your entrance, he sinks one into your core. A single digit pumping into needy walls that are already clenching in anticipation of the next one. Snatching your head back, he kisses you like he hates you. Hates you so much that he loves you. Loves you so much that he hates you. A cycle, endless and all consuming, that neither of you can break from.
“Prove it to me” he demands between your lips, plunging another finger into you, “Bend over and show me how sorry you are.” Your back arches, bringing your soft ass flush against his bulge. You press back into him, feeling his cock twitch against your ass each time his fingers slam into your core. Jimin sneaks a glimpse at the mirror to watch the way your body jiggles from the motion. Thighs trembling, tits rocking in sync with the harsh movements of his wrist.
“Fuck, you’re so pretty, baby.” Jimin slips his hand away from your neck, drenched fingers abandoning your pussy to apply sharp, wet slaps to your ass.
Spinning around to face him, you land an equally sharp slap across his face, “Choke me like that again and I’ll rip your head off.”
If the burning of your palm is any indication, you know you hit him hard but he’s unphased. He's actually smiling, licking his lips at you like you’re the most delicious thing in this restaurant. He sweeps you off of your feet, setting you down on the sink, “So. Fucking. Pretty.”
The marble’s even colder against your bottom than it was your hands but you don’t give a shit. Jimin’s tongue’s down your throat as he pushes your dress up, ripping away what was left of your panties. That’s the only thing you give a shit about. 
“Jimin!” you giggle, tugging at the zipper on his pants, “You’re gonna make me fall.”
Hooking his arms behind your knees, he spreads your legs, pushing them to your chest. “Don’t worry, baby. I won’t let you fall.”
“Promise?” you pout, fingertips tracing the veins along his length.
They pulse and twitch as he raises his hips, dragging the underside of his cock between your folds. “I promise. I won’t—aah, shit, baby” he moans, his cock glazed in your arousal without having even been inside of you yet. “I didn’t know you missed me that much.” 
You grab onto his shirt, the cotton knotted in your fists as you bask in the feeling of the head brushing your clit. “I did. Missed you so much” you mewl, guiding him to your entrance. Jimin peppers your cheeks with kisses, pushing into you. Filling you. Claiming you.  “I, mmphh, missed, fuck, missed you too” he confesses, each word emphasized by thrusts that have you wanting to climb every wall in this bathroom.
When it comes to women Jimin’s told more lies than he can remember but never with you. He misses you and he means it, misses you so much that it hurts. Not just because you take his cock so well, somehow managing to look majestic when you’re being fucked up against this mirror. But because he feels incomplete without you.
Before you all he knew was violence and greed, constantly chasing power that would never be enough. Always needing more. He often wondered how much money it would take, how many buried enemies, to fill the emptiness that’s haunted him for as long as he can remember. And then you came along—the girl whose eyes twinkle as she stares up at him, your entire body calling out his name—and he had his answer.
All he needed to cure that emptiness, rid him of the nagging feeling that something’s missing, was you. But men like him have an image to maintain. In this world people come to know you for things, fear you for them, and you can’t let them think you’re soft. Not for a second. Not if you want to get what you want. “We get what we want by any means”. That is what he told you but nothing’s worth having if it’s by way of losing you. 
Dragging you to the edge of the sink, heart thumping out of his chest from how tightly you’re clenching, he whispers into your open mouth, “Come home. I’m in hell without you. Everything’s so…so empty. Just say you’ll come back to me. Say it.”
“I-I’ll come back home. Fuck, I’ll go the moon if you want me to” you pant, watery eyes sending mascara streaming down your cheeks. You tug harder at his shirt, sending a button or two clinking into the mirror. He’s in you so deep, hitting every spot like only he knows how, that you’re ready to explode. Implode? One or the other. Maybe both.
Jimin laughs, his tongue grazing yours, “You wanna go to the moon, baby? Hold onto me. I’ll take you.”
Knowing better than to doubt him, you throw your arms over his shoulders and hold on like your life depends on it. The sink creaks beneath you as he fucks harder into a pussy that just won’t stop leaking for him. You lose control of your body. All of it belongs to him, as it should. You make no attempts at denying yourself the ultimate satisfaction when it hits. Your lips crash together as you climax, your moans, bordering on screams, pouring onto his tongue.
He eagerly devours them, returning some of his own as your walls spasm wildly, milking the cum from his swollen tip. Your cunt wants every drop of it and he’s determined to give it to you. Fill you up until it’s dripping out of you, making your thighs warm and sticky with his seed. Your body gives out and he tucks an arm behind you, sticking to his promise not to let you fall.
Staring up at the ceiling, you’re sure you see space, stars twinkling before your eyes as you float there, completely weightless. Jimin’s lips meet your heaving chest, suckling at your silky skin to leave hickeys along your collarbone.
“Mine. All mine” he repeats, “Love you so much.” 
You run your fingers through his hair as he marks you, letting yourself get lost in the moment. “I love you too.” 
“Excuse me, sir. You’re holding up the bathroom” a comically high pitched voice says, tapping at the bathroom door. Jimin drags himself upright, knowing the voice too well. “You okay?” he asks, shuffling to make you both look presentable. He tries to fix your dress but there’s no use, he’s stretched it out more than he has you.
“Baby, it’s fine” you giggle, shooing him away, “I got it.” 
Jimin unlocks the door, snatching it open to reveal precisely who you both expected. “Thank god!” Jungkook cheers, rushing into the bathroom and over to the toilet. “Whose idea was it to have one bathroom here, man? I’ve had to piss for like—” Reading the look on Jimin’s face, he follows his gaze over to the sink where you sit buzzed off of the afterglow with your tattered panties at your feet.
Jungkook grins, looking you both up and down, “Safe to say you two are having a good night, huh?”
Jimin hits Jungkook in the back of the head, walking over to help you down from the sink. He holds you close to him, kissing you as he steers you towards the door. “Is it done?” Jimin asks over his shoulder but you don’t hear Jungkook’s response. It’s drowned out by the symphony of sounds that assault you as you venture back out into the restaurant, Jimin’s arms still holding you tight. Scanning the restaurant you spot the table you were at with your date but now there’s another couple there. 
“Long time no see!” Jin says, jumping up to hug you. His girlfriend follows behind, hugging you like she hasn’t seen you in years. “Come sit with me” she insists, noticing your disheveled appearance, “I’ll fix you right up. I have everything in my purse.” You settle into the chair beside her and she goes straight to work cleaning the mascara from your face.
Jimin sits beside you, an arm draped over the back of your chair, and watches attentively as you get your makeup done. “Nice to have you back” Taehyung smiles, pulling something from under the table and passing it to you. Jimin sets them down before you—your jacket and your purse. You’d forgotten them at the table when you fled to the bathroom.
“Uh, thanks, I—” you stutter, cut off by Hoseok’s sudden reappearance at the end of the table. You’d seen him earlier but hadn’t noticed his seat was empty when you returned. He tries to play it off, hide it behind a smile, but he’s out of breath, utterly exhausted from something. The men glance around the table at each other. It’s a silent conversation you know you shouldn’t be in on. 
“Jimin” you whisper, when you’re sure you aren’t interrupting, “Where’s…” 
Jimin casually pours you both a drink, presenting you with a glass of wine. “Where’s who?” 
“The guy that I was…”
“The guy that you were what, baby?” he asks, brow crinkling as he feigns ignorance. “You’ve been here with me all night, haven’t you?” He turns to the rest of the table who all seem to share his collective memory loss. “Hasn’t she?” 
“Absolutely.”
“Yeah.”
“Been here all night.”
“See? Now enjoy your drink and finish getting your makeup done” he coos, kissing you on the cheek.
Just like that, everyone resumes their conversations like it’s any other Sunday night dinner. You take a sip of your wine, the post-orgasm haze finally lifts from your brain, and all of the pieces come together in your mind. You shake the truth away, opting instead for the constructed reality necessary to pretend you just didn’t get a man killed.
What date? What guy? You’ve been here all night with Jimin. The man you came here with. The man you’ll leave here with. The man you love too much to ever run away from again. Unless, of course, you want to raise the homicide rate.
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littlemisshyperfixation · 7 months ago
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BTS Fic Recommendations
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I'll go back and add more fics as I find them! <3
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⊹₊⋆ Seokjin
⊹₊⋆ Yoongi ♡part 1 ♡part 2
⊹₊⋆ Hoseok
⊹₊⋆ Namjoon
⊹₊⋆ Jimin
⊹₊⋆ Taehyung
⊹₊⋆ Jungkook ♡ part 1 ♡ part 2
⊹₊⋆ BTS Favorites
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hoseoksluna · 29 days ago
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THE FUN DAY, pt. I. | kth ft. pjm
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pairing: idol!military!boyfriend!taehyung x f. reader (ft. best friend!jimin)
genre: fluff, angst — the sad kind
word count: 4.8k
summary: you've prepared a fun day for your boyfriend's military vacation. thank god he's here, right?
pin: f. / playlist: fun / taglist: join / discord: join
warnings: suggestive but not described themes of sex and alcohol consumption.
note: i'm so EXCITED to bring you this fic that i can't wait until tomorrow to post this. everyone welcome TAEHYUNG and JIMIN to the hoseoksluna universe. i have to tell you a secret. taehyung was my first bias when i first became army. taehyungie was the first one to save me from the bunch—literally to resurrect me because in him i found all the things i used to love and fell out of. jazz, poetry, the aesthetics and arts. it is an honor to write about him and i think i will write another taehyung fic next week. if you have any ideas, drop them in my ask box and i will use them for inspiration. this fic is dedicated to my baby ruru @tkslovechild, my tatlim @jjk7k, and the beautiful anon that asked me for a tae fic while i was already working on this one. i love you all so much. enjoy this beautiful piece. <3 mwah.
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𓂃 ౨ৎ .
I am much too alone in this world, yet not alone enough to truly consecrate the hour. I am much too small in this world, yet not small enough to be to you just object and thing, dark and smart. I want my free will and want it accompanying the path which leads to action; and want during times that beg questions, where something is up, to be among those in the know, or else be alone.
I want to mirror your image to its fullest perfection, never be blind or too old to uphold your weighty wavering reflection. I want to unfold. Nowhere I wish to stay crooked, bent; for there I would be dishonest, untrue. I want my conscience to be true before you; want to describe myself like a picture I observed for a long time, one close up, like a new word I learned and embraced, like the everday jug, like my mother's face, like a ship that carried me along through the deadliest storm.
𓂃 ౨ৎ . — I Am Much Too Alone in This World, Yet Not Alone by Rainer Maria Rilke
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It was your love language, to dress up like your boyfriend. 
Dress pants, shirts and jackets. Linen, silk, leather. Pointed heels or oxford shoes. Grays, browns, beiges and whites. It was something that made you happy—and it was something that represented a vessel, made of unbreakable porcelain, for your love that you carried for Taehyung. 
He’s sitting in the corner of your bedroom, on a wooden stool he specifically placed at such a picturesque place. With the ivory curtains drifting along the nape of his neck, sheer enough to expose the small vase of tulips that stoop in a private longing for his touch. He fondles them often to preoccupy his mind when you take your usual long showers and he waits for the fashion shows you give him. He’s the one who says yes or no. These shoes, love. Look, they’re just like mine. And right at this moment, the wine-yellow petals are caught between his slender fingers when you come out and he doesn’t let go of them—because you’re not holding up the outfit for the day as you always are. 
For the fun day as you’ve called it. 
You’re dressed in it. Low-waisted gray dress pants with a little, tight, white shirt. Black stilettos, black shoulder purse. Your trench coat is waiting for you in the hall, hung up and lonely, but other than that you’re matching him fully. It feels as though you’re fading into him, becoming a singular being that has his DNA and his beauty, and when he beams up at you, boxy smile on full show, spine straight and tall on the stool, long fingers gripping its rim, Taehyung, with his gray suit and a white shirt, somehow validates that feeling. 
Somehow, in that peculiar Taehyung way of his. 
He extends his hands towards you, asking for your closeness. There’s a mist of murkiness that envelops him, with the saddened clouds beyond the window, standing in the place of the sun. It moves through you, this image of him reaching for you in this landscape, and you think he deserves to be painted like this. With black charcoal and a little bit of soft carmine to eternalize the blush of his cheeks—the only trace of color in the sketchbook. Your hands don’t know the art of drawing, but your heart does and while you take those necessary steps towards him, you feel the scratches of that dark pencil over that grainy flesh. 
His palms find your curves and you consider it unbelievable, the fact he’s still so big, despite the size of the stool and the height of your heels. No matter how much taller you grow, he’ll always be that tower that protects you from the blazing heat of the sun. 
He’s the epitome of autumn. No longer a boy, but a man, whose lungs are perfumed by apples, leaves, cinnamon, pumpkin spice and the slight iciness of the seasonal wind. Whose eyes witnessed the growth of your form since you were a little girl with two long braids. 
Childhood best friends turned to lovers, favored by the hanging, twinkling stars. 
You always saw him the most in autumn. Chasing you down during festivities that your mom couldn’t not be a part of, grabbing a hold of one of your braided pigtails with his already long fingers, then tickling you until you gave up. Ever so easy to catch because of the length of your hair. You knew, even as a little girl, that he was not just a part of your life, but your life itself. More than a companion, more than a friend. You dreamed about having his babies and that dream would come to life through your imagination whenever he would chase you down, years later, in the grand halls of the east wing of his grandiose family home, where nobody ever comes, just to steal a kiss or two. It was the moment you realized that you were no longer kids, even though you acted as such, but that you desired little legs to follow you in the fun of it all. 
And that kiss changed every autumn from that year on.
Stolen glances, the blush of cheeks, quivering fingers that no longer grabbed your braids. Not until many autumns later. You gave him your everything, every bit of your newly-bloomed femininity, your dream of having his babies and he folded it into the vinyls of his favorite jazz music that he would play every night whenever he needed inspiration or whenever he simply needed you. 
Newly. Not just yet as adults and no longer as kids. Somewhere in between. 
And then the duties of adulthood came. The natural process of drifting apart settled between your bodies and you no longer played in the stage between. Taehyung, the saxophone-playing jazz singer, moving foreign bodies into his personal, heart-sung rhythm. Not yours, never yours for a long time. You, working a day job that never paid enough, not for the dresses you yearned to wear at those clubs he would play at. 
But what you didn’t know was that drifting apart meant coming together eventually. 
He might have become your Turnip Head, silent and distant, but you were Sophie—and you found him. You found him while looking for something, or someone for the lack of better words, and he helped you. Over a cup of coffee he didn’t drink, at a jazz bar you always wanted to come to. Your date was a hit and miss and the guy never came, and your Turnip Head didn’t help you find your Howl. 
He helped you find himself. And from that moment on, you never drifted apart again. 
Who would’ve thought that seeking a relationship that did not resemble your dream nor your childhood would make you find him all over again. 
In autumn, too. 
Taehyung paid for your dresses, your female suits, paid for your drinks. Kissed you underneath those dimmed, brown lights before he went off to play songs that moved your body at last. Dancing alone to his songs was your dream come true until he set down his saxophone and joined you. Let his band mates play his favorite Etta James song as he took your hand and drifted upon the dance floor with you. Those who danced before this song sat down, let you have this opportunity for yourself, and Taehyung kissed you, after a long time, after many autumns had passed, right then and there. 
And both of you realized that you could never drift apart again. You could only drift together. 
You moved in together. He bought you tulips of every possible hue every week. Played you his new songs for you on the saxophone. Took you to art galleries. Took you sightseeing, sometimes alone with you, sometimes with Jimin joining you. Shared your dream about having babies with you and talked about it all the time. Tried it out, seized it many times, though the outcome both of you desired never came. Had a beautiful life with you until…
Until he thinned out into his Turnip Head form and skipped away to fulfill his country duties. 
But he’s here. Oh, he’s here. Buff and big, apples, cinnamon and pumpkin spice. Brown eyes that carry the memory of your growth, hands that clutch your hips and that hold the silky memory of your still long braids. Hands that edge around your slightly, barely puffy tummy and that don’t know that you are with a concoction of a small him and you, a divine magical realism, a dream that came true without his knowledge right after the last hours of his military vacation were up and he had to go back to serve the country. 
The reason behind this fun day. 
The day of his second vacation, the day you tell him. 
“You look just like me,” he breathes, the width of his smile never lessening, hands skipping over the space between your hips and your arms and grabbing your hands. It gets to you still, the way his eyes never look up at you, the way they never have, and you feel so sweetly small. Even more so when Taehyung stands to his feet and slides his suit jacket over your shoulders. You become even smaller, a fawn taken care of. A pregnant fawn. “And now you are me.” 
Oh, he doesn’t know just how much. Not yet. 
He sits back down and gently pushes you to take a step back. On wavering feet, like that freshly-born fawn, you waver on your feet, but Taehyung keeps you stable, leaning forward to make sure you’ve caught your balance. A wisp of his dark hair falls over his eye that he, at last, flicks up at you. And the sensation from it, it is nothing that you ever felt before. 
It is a step forward. 
It’s something that tells you: go ahead. 
You planned to tell him at the jazz bar where he kissed you for the first time as an adult and made you his. But now, now it feels more than right, amidst this strange newness that you don’t think you’ll ever experience again. 
You open your mouth, brace yourself, but Taehyung is faster. Ringing fills your ears, the atmosphere around you feels gooey—as if you’re walking through a limbo. 
“Jimin will meet us at the park.” 
Oh, yes. Walk in the park, a warm drink to go, then the jazz bar. Jimin is having his military break as well, about to sing in Taehyung’s honor, you already knew this, knew he would join you, but being in the presence of your boyfriend, the detail slipped out. 
The newness leaves. Taehyung straightens. Towers over you. The normalcy flattens over the chemistry between you and him, the atmosphere lessening to feathery lightness and when you move your arms to give back his jacket, your arms feel as though they’re not your own. 
Your smile falls. 
Jazz bar it is. 
“We should go,” you prompt, turning around, having all the balance in the world as you go fetch your purse and reapply your red lipstick. 
Taehyung watches you in the mirror, his boxy grin on eternal display, warming your heart. You think about how you can’t wait until his baby witnesses that smile for the first time—and wonder if God is molding, at this very hour, the same one upon their little face. It brings tears to your eyes, ones that you quickly blink away, and instead you focus on lining your lips with the tip of the lipstick with utmost precision. 
In your vast collection of lip liners, you don’t have a red one. Truth be told, you always feared this vibrant color. It represented a stigma you never liked—that only promiscuous women wear that color, but to you it was never that. 
It was a color that meant you lose your girlhood, your childhood upon wearing. 
And now, it is a color that announces the next era of your life: adulthood, but different, painted with motherly instincts that are of these vibrant hues. Womanhood. No longer fearful, but brave. 
Right. 
You want your baby to connect this color to you and know that you made it. You waited your whole life for their father and gave it to him in one of the autumns as a child. Without knowing, without realizing. 
That color is a legacy. 
As if he could hear your thoughts, Taehyung kisses the back of your head, halting your motions. Wraps his arms around you as he props his chin on the place he kissed—and right here, right now, you’re looking at a family portrait in the mirror. 
A living, breathing one. With lifting chests in tandem, growing smiles and a growing baby in your womb. 
Magical realism in full effect. 
And then Taehyung is off to fetch your trench coat, holding it up for your arms to slip inside its sleeves. Grabs your hand and revels in the autumn weather outside, boxy smile never faltering. Sings in the car on the way to the park, makes eye contact as he mouths the lyrics—kiss me once and kiss me twice, then kiss me once again, it’s been a long, long time—because he could never sing over that part. It’s too precious to his heart for him to do so. 
The wind accompanies you and grabs your other hand as you walk down the pathway lined with half-barren trees and a still pond. Taehyung hums the Bing Crosby song that seems to be playing on loop within his mind and it is the only greenery that spreads around through his husky voice. All else—the pond, the trees and the last of their leaves that dance around you, the shrubberies and the clouds up above—are smeared with sullen blues and grays, to which Taehyung is everlastingly immune. 
Jimin is standing by an antique coffee stand, dressed to the nines in an outfit he most definitely must be cold in. Black dress pants with a jacket that stuns you. A matching Hussar one, with golden braiding. A military piece of clothing from another time. You think it suits the fun day quite delightfully, but not as much as it suits him. The golden detail goes hand in hand with his golden hair and you think he needs his picture taken. 
“Jimin!” you call out, making his confused little face turn in your direction, and he swivels his body to face you altogether. He holds two cups of coffee in both of his hands, one for him and one for you. You melt at that and look up at Taehyung to see his boxy smile ever so frozen and beautiful, pointed at his best friend. 
When you reach him, he hugs you. His cold skin stings you and you quickly warm him up with rubbing motions against his back. Scrunch your brows in puzzlement when he doesn’t hug Taehyung nor even look at him. 
But all is swept away when Jimin exclaims in discomfort and takes a rapid sip of his boiling drink. 
“Jimin, where’s your coat?” you ask him in pity, watching him shake and moan in pain once he burns his tongue. He uses the cup to warm up both of his hands. 
“I didn’t think Paris would be so cold in October,” he explains in a hushed, livid tone, drawing the rim of the paper cup back to his lips as if he didn’t learn his lesson. Typical Jimin. “But this outfit is for Taehyung anyways, so I’ll survive.” 
He talks of him but he doesn’t look at him. Makes heart eyes at the misting coffee, instead. Like Taehyung isn’t here at all. 
Strange. 
You shake off the thought. 
“Go stand by the pond before you freeze. I want to take a picture of you,” you say, softly, pulling your phone out of your purse. Glancing up, you expect Jimin to be ready with his pose, but he’s looking at you as if you said the most outrageous thing in the world. Eyes wide, mouth downturned in horror. You laugh and place a hand on his arm. “Go, Jimin. This is a special day and special days ask for special pictures.” 
Jimin sighs and nods, despite the fact he doesn’t really look like he wants to do it. 
“Fine, but I’m keeping the coffee in my hand.” 
Your tender laughter prolongs. “Fair enough. Go pose with your little heat pack.” 
Gazing out at the pond, Taehyung is already standing there. With his brown coat over his gray suit, he coalesces with the autumnal scenery and you think he belongs there. That a statue should be made of him right where his feet are planted, for people to remember and appreciate his beauty. You snap a few pictures of him before Jimin makes his way towards the stone bannister and stops right in front of Taehyung, who towers over him. Jimin lifts his cup and smiles a little tight smile, the mist from his coffee eclipsing over him like a soft fog. Switching to portrait mode, Taehyung is gone by the time your screen clears out and shows Jimin by his lonesome self, setting his coffee cup down on the bannister and turning around for some dramatic, aesthetic shots. Taehyung laughs in your ear, catches your slipping purse and places it back on your shoulder, and what he says next gives your life a whole new meaning. 
“Jimin is cute, but he’s strong and sane enough to protect you while I’m gone.”
You pivot back, piercing your sight right through him, not believing those words were just flung out of him like that. Taehyung never mentioned you having a protector while being in the military and even the whole concept of it confuses you even deeper as Jimin is serving as well. He might not be in the special forces like your boyfriend is, but he’s serving nonetheless. The systems are the same, no matter the department. 
Before you can ask him what he meant by that, the sing-song tone of Jimin’s voice reaches you. He calls out your name with a bit of alarm. 
“What’s wrong?” 
You gaze back and meet his eyes in full motion—he’s already taking long steps towards you and grabbing your arm, taking your confusion to another level.  
“What happened?” he asks, his pupils thin dots that ripple through your skin with stiff, panicky electroshocks. You glance back at Taehyung to discover that he’s not standing behind you at all, but behind Jimin, clutching his shoulder. 
You blink. “Nothing.” 
Jimin lets go of your arm and inhales the autumnal air. The pond, suddenly, heaves. 
“Let’s go somewhere warm,” Jimin suggests and you agree with him with a nod of your head. Pinpricks of iciness kisses your fingertips, despite the fact you’re still holding your own cup of coffee that Jimin bought you. 
A strange feeling seizes you. 
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The jazz bar is an embrace of snug heat that embraces your womb first before greeting the rest of your body. You can’t help but to touch your baby, say to her in your heart: this is your Daddy’s most favorite place in the whole wide world. And the feeling is so surreal that it washes away the strange sensation that clung to you so heavily. 
You’re the first customers to come. Jimin sighs in absolute relief and he’s standing in the middle of the dance floor, frozen in time, as he lets the warmth of the place defrost his bones. Your cup of coffee was long finished and discharged; Jimin’s drank his in long sips that took seconds to finish, too, and the whole ordeal was so funny to you that it’s given you a sense of lightness that you needed. 
Taehyung hasn’t spoken a word since you left your apartment. 
He sits at the bar stool like he sat in your shared bedroom. One leg propped on the footrest while the other is relaxed on the floor, one hand folded on the apex of his thigh, the other drumming on the bar while the band he doesn’t know is rehearsing their instruments. You take a seat right beside him and feel like the parents you’re about to become. Sophisticated, classical, sublime. 
The pretentious kind, but in a good way. 
That thought makes you smile softly until the bartender asks you if you’d like anything. You politely decline her, even though you’d love a glass of wine with the daddy to be beside you. You can’t drink, not for many months to come. You wait for her to ask Taehyung the same question, but she doesn’t even lift her eyes to his direction. She wipes down the wood of the bar and leaps away. 
Nobody fucking asks Taehyung anything. 
Amidst a hearty guitar strumming solo, Jimin notices the furrow of your brows, the downturned pout of your mouth that opens to ask Taehyung about the strangeness that keeps occurring today. But before you get the words out, Jimin calls out your name into the microphone, the vowels made sweet by the sound of his princely voice. He stands with the band behind his back, his Hussar jacket exquisitely fitting the dimmed background. He holds out his hand for you, a poignant glint perched on top of his irises, and he flattens his puffy, pink lips. 
“Don’t be sad. Tonight is for Taehyung and all sadness is prohibited,” he says with his feigned announcer articulations, the corners of his mouth rounding in a similar manner to yours, in sympathy. “We will have to kindly ask you to leave if you proceed in your sadness. Please, join me here.” 
You roll your eyes, but the smile gracing your features couldn’t be erased even with the force of the whole wide world. You stand to your feet and paddle your way to him, the heels of your stilettos clicking on the worn parquets. Jimin gives you a soft grin and places his microphone down, meeting you halfway on the dance floor and taking your hand. 
It is when he begins to sing, just for you, that you perceive that the instrumental song the guitarist played is one, which is contained in one of Taehyung’s vinyls. The ones he would play in the darkest of nights and sing the lyrics to your bare body. Tears prick your waterline when Jimin guides you into a gentle slow dance while maintaining the tones of the song with utmost perfection. 
And Taehyung is carried in every languid motion and in every vocal cord that is strained upon this hour in his honor. 
I’m in the mood for love, simply because you’re near me…
You gaze back at Taehyung, who sits still and smiles his boxy smile. Frozen and beautiful, but unbreathing. 
Still and unbreathing. 
Frozen. 
You halt your movements. 
Jimin stops the dance, ends the song with a deep hum that pulses through you along with the notion that something isn’t right, but very, very wrong. 
“I wish Taehyung were here,” Jimin says with a deep sigh, holding both of your hands, and an uncanny, perplexing feeling constricts your throat. 
Your breath shivers, vision blurry. “But he is here.” 
Jimin lets go of your hands and you lament his touch. You need to be touched because you feel yourself shrinking into a fawn most vulnerable that doesn’t know what’s real anymore. A fawn just born, pathetically ignorant of the world and of her loved ones.
“I know, but I wish he were here for real.” 
A cold sweat drips down your spine, paralyzing you. Your constricted throat dries up like a well and you can’t swallow. You can’t think, you can’t blink—your lungs can’t lift to inhale any air and they mirror Taehyung’s still ones, unbreathing. 
It is a surprise to you, the question that flows out of you. 
“Jimin, who is sitting at the bar?” 
A wrinkle forms between his brows as he sweeps his gaze over all those bar stools and doesn’t linger at the occupied space that you know is there. A perturbing energy thuds in his eyes once he returns them to yours, and that alarming potency in him rises once again. 
“Who do you see there?” he asks, carefully, leaving his mouth parted as he anticipates your answer. 
You peer back behind you and don’t find any bar stools occupied. Not single one. 
No Taehyung, smiling his boxy smile. 
No Taehyung behind Jimin. 
No Taehyung behind you. 
A sob rumbles out of you in unison with your realization that you were, indeed, very wrong. You catch your sob, covering your mouth with your fingers as your tears spurt down onto your cheeks. 
And then the memories arrive, the reality.
But Jimin ceases their flow with the warmth of his even more careful question. 
“Did you see him at the park, too?” 
You can only nod, but you can’t look at him. You stare at nothing in particular and it seems that what Jimin has ceased, he allows to stream through the pond of your thoughts, accompanied by his vocalized truth. 
“Taehyung isn’t here. He should’ve been here with us, but he had to go to North Korea. There was a conflict, remember? You know this.” 
Taehyung’s apologetic text message appears before your eyes. The letter that came first before his phone call, where he explained to you that he can’t have his vacation and visit you because he has to go and save his country. The real, known reason between the pair of you and Jimin behind this fun day. To honor Taehyung for what he’s doing. The day you wanted to share, as well, that you were pregnant. 
The aloneness has gotten to you, helped by your blessed state. Confused your mind to the point that you imagined him here when he’s not here at all. 
Jimin calls your name and you glance at him. Perhaps he can see the truth dawning on you by the way pity twists his features. He caresses your arm and leaves his hand there, his heat locking in the realization. 
“What has happened to you?” 
Another onrush of tears clouds your vision. Your spine bends. And you can’t. 
You can’t not tell him. You can’t keep it in. 
“I’m pregnant.” 
Jimin’s eyes widen and it merely takes him a second to envelop you in his embrace. He coos your name, rubs your back, a whimper resonates in his chest against yours as he holds back his tears. The music falls into nothingness—and nothing is said for a time that appears to be as long as the season of autumn. 
And then, somehow, you’re outside of the jazz club, sitting on Jimin’s Hussar jacket that he put down on the cold ground for you beside him. And the silence continues until it doesn’t. 
“Does he know?” he asks, and you feel his irises gliding across the side of your face that you cannot turn. 
It’s you who’s frozen this time. 
Still and unbreathing. 
With no smiling Taehyung at your hip. 
“I wanted to tell him tonight,” you say, quietly, with your hands helplessly in your lap. “On the day of his vacation that he looked forward to.” 
Jimin sighs, the sound full of that terrible pity. “How far along are you?” 
It’s a question that brings life to your numb hands and you take them to your belly. 
“Three months.” 
A beat of silence. 
You fondle your growing baby. Jimin seems to be watching you, considering his following words, but you fear to move your eyes. Lift them in expectation to see Taehyung only to meet the half-barren trees and the leaves on the ground that have absurdly regained their vivid colors. 
Lift them to look at Jimin and meet the outcome of your autumn-long aloneness. 
“He’ll be back in a month and I’ll talk to the Sergeant and offer my own vacation. I’ll give it up so you can see him and tell him.” 
A sob lodges itself in your throat and you tilt to the side, leaning your head on Jimin’s shoulder. He, in response, leans his against yours. 
“I don’t think your Sergeant will even hear you out,” you say, humorlessly, your personal pain still prickling the flesh of your heart. 
But then Taehyung’s words wash over you. 
Jimin is cute, but he’s strong and sane enough to protect you while I’m gone.
Jimin, Taehyung’s best friend, who’s been there for him through thick and thin, long before you came into the picture. Jimin, who stuck by your side when sightseeing, and took your pictures. Who devoured dinners with you and drank a whole bottle of liquor with you when Taehyung abstained. 
Jimin, your best friend, too. 
“Will you be here for me while he’s gone?” you ask, the sob in your throat enlarging, preventing you from speaking, but you push through. “So I won't get delusional again?” 
Jimin takes your hand in his, squeezing it firmly in your lap, his thumb brushing over your little, half-swollen belly. 
“It’s the least I can do. Let’s get you home.” 
And he does. 
He calls a cab. Walks with you up the stairs, lingers at the door, watches you take off your heels—watches the comprehension of this day being anything but fun take form on your face and posture, and he hugs you. Reassures you that he will be here the whole week until his vacation is over, and even long after that. 
And you nod. Thank him. Turn your head away when he clicks the door shut behind him. Walk over to the window and stifle your tears when you see him head over to the liquor store in front of your apartment and leave with a bottle of spirits hanging from his fingertips. 
And the tears rush out, despite your efforts, when your gaze cascades down onto the windowsill and onto the vase, where white wine-doused tulips stooped in yearning for Taehyung’s touch a few hours ago. 
They aren’t stooping. They’re flaccid, dead and withered. Like the fun day you prepared.
Because Taehyung hasn’t bought any newly blooming tulips in a long while. 
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𓂃 ౨ৎ LOVE-KISSED BABIES: @jjk7k , @tkslovechild , @euphoricmyth , @cinmmongirl , @ririkookiemonster , @perfectiondazesworld , @https-mei , @bangtansonyeondanue , @jungkoock , @cinmmongirl , @hoseokkie-caeks , @kam9404 , @fr0ggieth1nk , @parkinglot-nights
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BACK to masterlist | read part two
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writtenwhalien · 1 month ago
Text
a lover's redemption | chapter 1
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chapter 1. way down we go
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pairing ↠ mafia leader!park jimin x reader
genre ↠ mafia AU — romance/action (angst, fluff, smut)
summary ↠ Blood, business and betrayal is all that Park Jimin has ever known, but when you cross paths again, the stakes are raised even higher and he finds himself battling his conscience, and his heart.
word count ↠ 10k
18+ | warnings ↠ drinking, explicit sexual content, violence, all sorts of crime (please see the series masterlist for a complete list of warnings).
taglist is open – dm/comment/send an ask to be added <3
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notes ↠ please enjoy and share xoxoxox i'll confirm the release date of chapter 2 soon—this fic is a lot of work lol so in the meantime pls enjoy this longer chapter <3 and i used korean family names bc its a jimin fic and its hard to try and think of any other way that flows/to not use names, sorry not sorry, just imagine what you want xx
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14th September 2003
“That’s it, good girl, Y/N—ow!” 
Your dad clutched his leg after a particularly hard roundhouse kick to his thigh. 
“Haha, well done, Y/N,” your granddad laughed from the side, clapping his hands in praise of you which motivated you to keep going. 
Going in for another front punch, you dodged your dad’s punches – which he pulled to avoid hurting you – and then you came in with a sharp jab to his ribs. 
“Ah, gosh, okay, okay,” he chuckled, taking a step back off the mat. “I think we should finish for the day, I’m gonna be covered in bruises tomorrow.”
“Was I good?” you asked, eager to hear your dad’s compliments as always. 
“You were amazing, dear,” your granddad said, stepping forward and ruffling your hair. “You remember what I told you, yes?”
“Yes,” you nodded, stating the next words like a mantra. “Self defence is a state of mind that begins with the belief you are worth defending.” It’s what your granddad had told you since you started training last year at the age of five.
“Still got it,” your dad smiled, kneeling down to help you pull off your shin guards. “You can show Jae-ho the combination tomorrow, but for now, let’s go get ready for dinner before your mom kills me.”
Beaming, you ripped your gloves off. “Can we go again before class tomorrow?”
“Of course we can,” your dad said, patting your back, and together you raced out of the summer room and back into the house, as your granddad followed leisurely behind you. 
“Mom, I learned a new combination today!” you beamed, climbing up onto the stool at the breakfast counter.
Your mom smiled at you, her apron covered in flour as she puts a tray into the oven. “That’s amazing sweetie, I’ll watch it tomorrow when Jae-ho comes over, okay?”
“Okay,” you nodded, reaching over and taking an apple from the fruit bowl.
Taking off her apron, your mom walked around the counter towards you. “Ah, your hair is all sweaty, you must have been working really hard.” She took out your hair tie, combing through your hair with her fingers.
“Ow,” you grimaced, still munching on your apple. “It was really hot.”
She laughed. “I’m sure it was.” 
“There she is!” The sound of your grandma’s voice made you turn around. She smiled as she came towards you. “Let’s get you bathed before dinner.”
“Do I have to?” you grumbled.
Your grandma paused, sniffing the air. “What’s that smell?” 
Laughing, you hopped off the stool and ran towards the door. “It’s you, grandma!”
“What?!” She laughed with mock surprise, looking at your mom. “Is it me?”
“Hm…” Your mom paused and played along, sniffing your grandma. “Nu-uh.” She looked at you. “I think it’s coming from our pretty princess over there.” 
“I thought so,” your grandma smiled, before she and your mom proceeded to chase you through the house while you ran down the corridors and laughed gleefully. As you jumped on your parents bed, trying to make a beeline for their bathroom door, your mom caught you, cuddling you and smothering you in kisses before you eventually had to have a bath. Your grandma styled your hair in a ponytail with a pretty headband of your choice. You chose a blue one to match your dress and together you made your way downstairs. 
As you entered the living room, your dad turned around and behind him stood a tall man with dark hair neatly slicked back. 
“Y/N, honey, there’s someone I’d like you to meet,” your dad said, smiling reassuringly as he took your hand. 
You’d met a lot of your dad’s friends and they all seemed nice. But this man was different. He didn’t look kind at all. As you approached, your attention was stolen by a boy standing close behind the man. He looked around your age, with brown hair and brown eyes. His cheeks were round and rosy which gave him a playful and friendly appearance, except for the unmistakable fact that he looked scared. 
“This is my friend, Jihoon, and his son, Jimin.”
At first you felt nervous, looking between your dad and the big stern looking man beside him. Glancing at your grandma, you eased up when she nudged you and smiled. 
“Why don’t you say hello, Y/N?” she said.
Your dad kneeled down as you looked up at the man. “You can say hello if you want, sweetie.”
“It’s lovely to meet you, Y/N,” the man said, his lips curving into what must’ve meant to have been a smile — you thought it made him look scarier. “I’m your uncle Jihoon.” He extended his hand. 
Timidly, you shook it. Then your gaze fell to the boy standing behind him.
“Jimin.” Jihoon’s voice was suddenly sharp as he summoned his son to come forward. 
Looking up at his father in what you could only interpret as fear, he took a few steps forward and stopped in front of you. “Hello, I’m Jimin,” he said quietly, putting his hand forward just like his father did. 
“Hi, Jimin,” you said, reaching for his hand and shaking it once. “I’m Y/N.”
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6 years later 17th July 2009
Sunlight streamed in through the windows, bringing in ample light to the summer room. Arranged messily on the table were pots of paint and brushes with a few complete canvases surrounding you as you worked. The canvas in front of you was a mix of vibrant colours, some careful strokes and others wild splashes you had crafted as you concentrated hard, your hand gripping the brush as you attempted to follow your father’s lead.
He had almost completed his piece, after many days working on it. A black sky tinged with deep hues of blue, and a single spear of lightning emerged through dark, swirling clouds, casting a pale, cold light reflecting off of the tempestuous sea of violent waves.
“Oh no,” you frowned, sitting back to get a better look at your work. “I ruined it.”
Your dad glanced over, smiling softly. “You didn’t ruin anything. It’s just different now, which is good.”
“But it doesn’t look how I wanted. It’s messy now.”
Your dad paused, getting up from his position in front of his much more professional easel to come and look at your work. Then, he dipped his brush in one of the colours you created and added a soft swirl, then another. You watched quietly as he added more.
“Things don’t always turn out how we want them to, sweetheart. That happens a lot in life. But you can always choose what to do next, even when things get messy.”
“What do you mean?”
Your dad set the paint brush down and sat on the chair next to you. Lines creased his forehead, his expression becoming sombre. It was something you’d been noticing more over the past few years.  
“Y/N, there will be times when everything around us feels messy or wrong — like people are not being kind, or things not going how we planned. You can’t always change that. But what you can control is how you act, even when everything feels hard. Being a good person means doing the right thing, even when the world around you isn’t.”
You frowned, thinking hard. “But what if people are mean, or if bad things happen? How do I be good when that’s happening?”
Your dad smiled warmly. “It’s like painting. Sometimes, you’ll have dark colors, or you’ll make a mistake. But you get to decide what comes next. You can add light, bring in something beautiful, even if the first stroke didn’t go how you wanted. You don’t have to paint what’s around you—you can paint what’s in here.” Gently, he tapped your chest over your heart.
Looking down, you began to understand. “So… even if everything’s messy, I can still make something pretty?”
“Exactly. You can always choose to do the right thing, to be kind, to help someone, even if others aren’t. It’s not always easy, but that’s what makes it important. Being a good person isn’t about waiting for things to be perfect, it’s about being good, even when things aren’t.”
You nodded, picking up your paintbrush and adding a swirl of your own. “Like this?”
With a grin, your dad nodded. “That’s perfect. You see? No matter how dark or messy things seem, you can always choose to make it better.”
“I want to do that, dad. I want to make things better, like you do.”
Your dad smiled, pulling you into a hug. “You already do, sweetheart.” 
You hugged him back, smiling when you felt him kiss the top of your head. Pulling away, you hopped off the chair. “What about yours? Is it finished?”
“I think so.”
“Lightning…  is it a storm?” you asked, standing next to your dad in front of the easel. 
“Yes,” he said, ruffling your hair with his elbow as his hands were smudged with paint. 
“What does it mean?”
“Sometimes it can mean power,” he answered, turning back to the canvas in front of him. “But sometimes it can also mean punishment.”
You looked up, frowning.
He smiled. “Sometimes, too much power isn’t a good thing. If you’re not a good person, then it can be dangerous.”
“Oh…” You looked back at the canvas, admiring the deep shades of blue and black and grey he’d used to paint the night sky. “Who is it for?” you asked.
Your dad’s smile disappeared as he looked back at the canvas. “An old friend.”
You looked at your dad and noticed he looked sad. “Are you not friends anymore?”
He shook his head, a smile returning. “We are. Dad’s just being silly.” He patted your shoulder gently. “Come on, let’s go have dinner. All this painting has made me hungry.”
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Dinner passed peacefully that night with your parents and grandparents conversing as they always did, and you spent most of the time poking your mom’s belly to try to get your growing baby brother to respond. 
Then, as soon as your dad finished eating, he got a text. Everyone on the dinner table went quiet and for a moment, you were forgotten.
“It’s Han-jae,” your dad said quietly. “He’s asked to see me.”
Your granddad exhaled slowly and you saw how your mothers hand tensed around her fork. 
“I told you not to get involved,” she murmured, looking at your dad with worry. 
He reached for her hand, caressing it gently. “I had to, love, you know that.”
“Why you?” she implored, almost desperately. “Why couldn’t you ask someone else.”
“I don’t know who to trust right now, Jihoon hasn’t been himself lately.”
“Jihoon is the same as always, he’s a cold man,” your mother answered.
“Sae-yi is right. Jihoon has always been a heartless person.”
“Perhaps that’s why I can’t trust him with this."
“Then don’t." Your mom took your fathers hands in both of hers. “But do you have to go?”
Your dads face gave her the answer and she sighed, grip loosening on his hand.
“Honey,” he whispered, closing his hand around hers firmly again and leaning in. “I’ll have my men with me, we’ll be back within an hour, I promise.” Smiling, he kissed her on the lips. “I’ve known Han-jae almost all my life, nothing’s going to happen.”
Your mother’s worried expression didn’t falter. “He’s the one who’s changed. I don’t trust him, not after what he was going to do to Jiyoung.” 
“I know,” your dad said, moving his hand in to hold your mom's cheek. “And that’s why I can’t let him know anything’s up, Ji-young isn’t safely out of the country yet so I should go.”
Leaning into his touch, your mom sighed. “Your heart's too big for this world, Sehun.”
Your dad smiled, pressing his forehead against hers and placing his hand on her swollen tummy. “It’s just big enough for you and my beautiful family.” He looked across at you sitting beside your mother and took your hand too, kissing it softly. “Look after your mama while I’m away, and we’ll have some dessert when I get back, okay?”
You nodded, confused yet reassured by your father’s smile. Nodding back, your dad kissed your mother once more before saying goodbye to your grandparents too. Your mom and granddad walked him out while your grandma stayed with you and made you finish your dinner.
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The first half hour passed as normal. You stayed sitting with your grandma while your mom and granddad spoke privately in the kitchen. That was nothing new to you, you’d grown up with the adults having many private conversations out of earshot, so nothing felt off… until another fifteen minutes later.
Your mom wouldn’t stop pacing back and forth, her phone in her hand. “Neither of them are replying to my texts. He always replies, always.” You could hear the panic in her voice, the slight tremor that shook you deeply inside.
Then your grandma had the maid get you ready for bed, and you couldn’t hear what the grown-ups were whispering anymore. You were used to being sent to bed like this so you did what you always did — you sat by your bedroom window to watch the blacked out cars that usually come and go in the driveway. Except this time there weren’t any cars so instead you clambered on to your bed to read a book while you waited for your dad. 
As you grew bored, you remembered your dad promised to be back within the hour… glancing at the clock in your room, you realised he was late. 26 minutes late. 
A pit of worry grew in your stomach and you wished to be near your mom, so you got out of bed and walked to the door, your favourite book in your hand as you hoped to read to your little brother like you’d done so many times before.
Clutching it tightly, you walked out of your room towards the staircase, and then you heard it —  your mothers heart wrenching scream. 
At that moment, you knew your dad wasn’t going to be coming back home. 
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present day
“One cappuccino please, and a croissant too.”
Without looking up from where you’re still folding the tea towels, you respond to the customer. “To eat in or takeaway?”
“Eat in.”
“Coming right up.” You fold the last one, patting it down before turning to face the customer. “That’ll be 9000 won plea– oh.” You pause, looking at the man behind the counter. “Hello again.”
“Hi, Y/N.” He smiles warmly, pulling out his wallet from the pocket of his black trenchcoat. 
“Ah, you remember my name.”
“And you don’t remember mine,” he grins, nodding his head when you wince apologetically. “Seojun.”
“Seojun,” you repeat. “I’ll remember that now, I promise.”
He chuckles, placing a 50000 won note on the counter. “Don’t sweat it. And keep the change,” he says, turning around to seat himself at the closest table.
You pick it up, shaking your head. “Again?”
He folds his coat over the empty chair beside him before smoothing down the lapels of his suit jacket. “Yes, and don’t try to give me an extra muffin to make up for it.”
You deposit the bill into the till and put the change in the tip jar. Glancing at him, you see him looking over his shoulder out the window. “Did you at least like it?”
Seojun turns back and smiles. “Nope.”
“Hey!”
“I’m just being honest, I’m not a fan of blueberries,” he shrugs. “If you’re gonna give me anything, I'll take another coffee to go, iced americano this time.”
“Hmph, whatever,” you mumble, getting to work on his cappuccino. “I worked on that muffin recipe for weeks.”
“Try less baking powder maybe?” You shoot him a look when he says this and he puts his hands up defensively. “Or not.”
“Maybe if you weren’t tipping so much, I wouldn’t have to give you a muffin,” you say, steaming the milk for his drink.
“There’s a jar there for a reason,” he points out, nodding to the tip jar on the counter which you’ve kept there for your younger employees on top of the generous wage you pay them.
“Fair.” You finish preparing his cappuccino and plate up the croissant, walking over to his table. “Just don’t diss my muffins.”
“I’m sorry,” he says, doing little to hide the amusement in his voice. 
“Yeah, whatever,” you roll your eyes, smiling as you place his order down. “Here.” 
“Sit with me,” he says, kicking the seat out from in front of him. 
Pausing, you look at the only other occupied table. They seem fine, so you take Seojun’s offer, getting yourself a muffin and slipping into the seat while he looks over his shoulder again.
“Expecting someone?” you ask, breaking off a piece. 
“Hm?” He faces forward again, quickly shaking off the serious expression on his face. “Oh, no.” Smiling, he takes a sip of his coffee.
“How’s your girlfriend?” you ask, remembering the last conversation you had with him in which he told you all about his plans to surprise his girlfriend with a handcrafted bracelet made by himself. Apparently the diamonds from Tiffany’s just don’t feel special to him anymore. 
You smiled when he said that to you – it reminded you of your dad. It was easy enough to walk into a store and order the most expensive jewels, so he preferred to pour his time and effort into surprising your mom with paintings. He was good at it too, something you’ve grown to be envious of since you can’t say he passed the same talent to you.
Seojun smiles. “She’s good. Loved the bracelet.”
This makes you smile. “I’m glad.”
“How’s your grandma?”
“She’s great,” you nod. The last conversation you had with Seojun, was actually also the first. He walked into the cafe last week and immediately started a conversation with you. At first, you were slightly wary, but you’re always cautious so you went along with it. He’s a nice guy, and truthfully, you were glad for a change from all the college gossip you were used to hearing from your younger employees. They have a lot of drama, some of which bores you. 
Speaking with Seojun just seems familiar, like speaking with an old friend. 
“How’s her gallery?”
“Busy. She barely even calls me these days.”
Seojun chuckles. “Maybe you should visit her, I’m sure she’d like it.” 
At this, you pause, smiling. “I should. It’s been a while since I've seen her.” Your fork pokes aimlessly at the muffin. “I’ve just been a bit busy.”
“With the cafe?”
“Huh?” You look at Seojun, only to catch him looking back towards you just in time. That’s the third time he’s looked over his shoulder.
“I asked if you’re busy with the cafe,” he repeats, quickly looking down to take a bite of his croissant.
“Well, yeah,” you lie, also looking down. It’s a simple answer when the truth is more complicated. 
Seojun looks at you, eyes slightly rounded in concern. “It might be a good idea to take a break, no? Get out of Seoul and stay with her for a while.” 
This gives you pause, and you stare at him. “I don’t think I'll be leaving Seoul for a while,” you answer, watching him carefully. 
But before he can respond, you’re interrupted by your phone ringing in your back pocket. Pulling it out, you see your grandma is calling. Glancing up at Seojun, he’s now looking down at his half empty cup while tensely rubbing his thumb against the side of his tight fist.
“Excuse me,” you mutter, getting up and answering the phone. “Hello?”
“Hello, Y/N, sweetheart?”
You frown, immediately hearing something off in her tone. Looking back over your shoulder, you see Seojun looking through his suit pockets for something. You face forward again. “Yes, it’s me. Are you okay? You don’t normally call this early.”
There’s a pause on the other side of the phone as you hear your grandma let out a small sigh. “I’m well,” she says. “I just needed to make sure you’re fine.”
“I am, but you already know that,” you remind her. “I called you this morning.”
“I know.” There’s another soft silence.
“Did something happen?” you ask, an uncertain feeling brewing in your chest. Your grandma has never had any reason to call like this before. Maybe if she knew of the midnight runs you frequently went on, she would, but as it happens, she doesn’t. You’ve made sure of that by having Yoongi promise to keep it from her, and his own father, Min Hyun-tae who is the closest confidante of your grandma.
Eventually, she answers. “I heard there’s been some trouble with the Cheong’s and… ah, never mind. I was just worried.”
You frown – Yoongi should’ve told you this too. “Well, what is it?”
“Don’t worry about it, just stay out of trouble, okay?”
“Moni, what is it–”
“Y/N,” she interrupts, her voice suddenly stern. “Whatever it is, it’ll pass over in a few days.”
Holding your tongue, you exhale heavily through your nose. You know your grandma is only this protective of you to keep you safe and she has every reason to worry, which makes it harder that you have to lie to her so often. 
“Okay. Promise me you’ll stay safe too.”
Your grandma chuckles. “I’m living a quiet life here in Namwon, dear. Don’t worry about me.”
She’s safe, you remind yourself. Away from the memories and danger here in Seoul. “Okay, I love you,” you say softly.
“I love you too. Bye now.”
Ending the call, you can’t ignore the feeling that remains in your chest, and when you turn around, you’re surprised to see that Seojun has gone. All that’s left on the table is the dishes and his receipt. Drawing closer, you see he’s scribbled something on the back of it: She’s the only family you have left. You should stay with her. 
In the two conversations you’ve had with Seojun, you haven’t once mentioned any other family member, and he never asked, yet he seems to know that it’s just you and her left…
Suddenly, it occurs to you that maybe Seojun knows who you are. 
After your father was killed, your granddad went to great lengths to protect the rest of you, which included keeping your family information strictly secure – even now if you were to go down to a police station, they would have trouble finding much information on you except what you want them to know. Only someone who knows your family could know that it’s just you and her, because your mother’s medical records of her death following her cardiac arrest during early labour are completely unobtainable, as are your granddad’s after his pneumonia.
Looking out of the cafe window, you scan the streets and see no sign of Seojun anywhere. 
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You need to call Yoongi. That’s the first thing you need to do and after that, you’ll look into Seojun. Your conversation with him and your grandma is still playing on your mind, even now as you rush down the streets to get to your car. 
As you brush past people, you accidentally bump into someone.
“Oh, sorry,” you mumble, looking towards the face of the guy you just bumped into.
He smiles, shaking his head as he pats your arm. “Don’t worry.”
Pursing your lips, you nod and smile before resuming your walk. Another twenty minutes later, you’re pulling up towards the gate of your home. Although it’s a modest sized house (still slightly larger than the average), your grandma insisted on your extra security.  
“Good evening, miss,” your guard, Dani, calls out, smiling and waving as she opens the gate from her station.
“Hey, Dani,” you smile, slowing the car down next to her to talk through the window. “Anything today?”
She jumps up onto the ledge, shaking her head. “Nope. A camera around the back picked up some movement just a little while ago but Siho checked it out, was nothing...”
You’re barely paying attention to her as your mind still wanders on Seojun.
“Uh, Y/N?”
“Huh?” you look at her, slightly startled.
Dani smiles. “Long day?”
“Something like that.” 
Her expression softens. “Make sure you eat well tonight, hm?”
“I will,” you nod. “Let me know if you need anything.”
“Sure.” She waves you on as you drive further onto your property, parking in the driveway.
Dani and Siho are the guards you employed when your grandma told you to. They both have a past in the military but retired early for whatever reason (they don’t talk about it much and you don’t ask). In truth, you’re very grateful to them – some nights it’s easier to sleep knowing they’re helping to look out for you.
Grabbing your purse from the passenger seat, you get out of your car and walk towards the house. 
Everything seems normal as you unlock the front door, entering the wide hallway downstairs – you have no reason to notice the drops of blood by the kitchen door – so you take your shoes off and hang your coat and bag in the cloakroom as you normally would before heading upstairs to your bedroom. 
But when you get to the top, you halt, noticing something. Far less obvious than droplets of blood, it’s the sight of your bedroom door left slightly open. You always close your bedroom door. It’s just a habit you’ve always had to close the door when you leave…
Immediately, your senses become more alert, your ears perking up for any noise in the house.  It’s odd, you don’t understand how anyone could’ve gotten into the house as long as Dani and Siho have been guarding the house. Unless, thinking back on the day, you know you have good reason to be on alert.
So you tread silently towards your room, kicking it open and—
Nothing. Your room is exactly as you left it this morning. You relax after checking a few possible hiding spots and finding them empty. But still, you know to be more cautious than this, so you take the handgun from the drawer in your nightstand and check all the other rooms. 
The metal feels light in your hand, even though you’ve never actually used this particular gun since Hyun-tae gave it to you on the night of the only break-in at the home in Namwon. You were only sixteen, wide-eyed and terrified when he told you to stay with your grandma and not come out until he came back. 
The gun was a last resort, of course you knew that the many men guarding the house would intercept whoever was threatening what was left of your family, but even then, it made you feel safer, more sure of yourself. Just as it does now while you walk through your house, alert for any movements.
Your body freezes as you spot the droplets of blood on the floor. 
Now that’s not your blood.
Muscle memory takes over as your thumb moves to cock the gun. Your heart beats harder in your chest, every sense on high alert as you silently stand behind the kitchen door. 
Holding your breath, you can make out the quiet sounds of heavy, laboured breathing… you inch slowly towards the edge as far as you can to peer in and see no one from where you are. 
Exhaling slowly, you count down to three before stepping into the kitchen, gun aimed as you quickly scan the kitchen and then you see the intruder, the aim of your gun following your sight.
Collapsed on the floor against your kitchen wall, a tall man holds his hand against his chest where a deep red stain spoils the white shirt of his suit. He looks up at you, face desperate yet determined.
“Don’t shoot, it’s me.”
Flicking on your kitchen light, you stare at him for a second until you recognise him… “Seojun?” A knot of uncertainty and fear tightens in the pit of your stomach.
Immediately you uncock your gun, rushing over to him. “What happened? Why are you here?” You reach for his wound to apply pressure but his bloodied hand closes around yours, stopping you. 
“Y/N, I’m sorry.”
Looking up, you meet his gaze and the fear in his expression sends shivers down your spine despite you being confused. “Let me help you,” you say shakily, hands moving to his wound again.
Seojun weakly shakes his head, trying to reach for your arm again. “No, Y/N, you need to leave,” he says, voice firm despite his severe injury.
“You need an ambulance,” you say, ignoring the slight tremble of your hands. “I’ll call an ambu—”
“No,” he interrupts, pulling on your hand again before crying out quickly from the quick movement. “Your guards,” he breathes, “they’ll keep you safe, Jimin will keep you safe, you need to go.”
The sound of him in pain sends panic rushing through you and yet he still seems adamant about what he’s saying. “W-what are you talking about?” your voice is still shaky as you ignore the firm hold of his hand on your wrist to keep pressure on him.
Seojun cries out quietly again but still fumbles for something in his suit jacket pocket. He pulls out a small black flash drive, thrusting it into your chest. “Give this to Jimin, tell him to use it.”
Eyes wide, you take the flash drive from him and slip it into your back jean pocket.
“You can’t let anyone else get it,” he continues, breathing hard as he winces in pain. “No one except him.”
“Okay,” you nod, squeezing his palm gently to reassure him although your mind is still stuck on trying to process the bleeding man in your kitchen to even take in what he’s saying. “I promise, now let me call you an ambulance—”
“There’s no time, I’m sorry, they’re coming,” he says, desperately now. “I won’t be able to help you.”
“Seojun, what—“
The sound of a window being smashed at the front of your house cuts the words off in your throat and Seojun’s hand tightens around your wrist. 
“Y/N,” he says, voice firmer and louder than before. “Go.” 
You look back at him, heart pounding frantically in your chest as you hear multiple voices coming from somewhere in your house. Seojun starts to stand up, using you to help him. 
He’s leaning against the wall, the fatal wound to his chest forgotten as he pulls his gun out and grasps you tightly around the arm. “Now.”
The voices outside get louder, and there’s a voice in the back of your head telling you to listen to Seojun – you need to go. 
Closing your fingers around your own gun again, you nod, pushing down the part of you that wants to stay with Seojun. He’s injured and you know if he doesn’t get help now he’s going to bleed out. However, you also know a fatal wound when you see one, and so does Seojun.
He’s filling the barrel of his gun with bullets as the voices get louder and you know that he’s about to buy you the time you need to get away. Because of that, you do as he asks.
Blinking back tears, you step away from him and towards the back door of the kitchen while cocking your gun again. Before you even get there, the kitchen window is being smashed in and you coil instinctively to avoid the flying shards of glass.
From somewhere behind you, you hear Seojun yell your name but you’re now focused on the man who’s standing ahead of you with a hammer in his hand. Gun raised, you shoot at him but he darts sideways before swinging his arm towards you with the hammer.
He misses you by an inch as you duck and aim your gun at him again. But before you can shoot, he grabs the gun and tugs hard, pulling you into his body. With a loud grunt, he raises the hammer and gets ready to take another swing at you, except the sound of three shots firing pierce the air and his body falls to the floor beside you.
Head turning around wildly, you see Seojun still leaning against the wall with his gun aimed towards you. He just saved your life. Before you can even get the words out to thank him, two more men jump through the kitchen window and the voices from out in the hallway show their  faces.
There’s half a dozen of them in total and you have no way out now. Seojun pulls on your hand to keep you close to him and it dawns on you now that this isn’t like anything you’re used to – these men are trained fighters, not just some lousy guards put out to watch a warehouse or defend a shipment of weapons. You’ve trained since a young age too, so you know you could at least fight them one on one, but this is different. These men are dangerous and you have no doubt that they’re the ones who put the fatal bullet into Seojun.
As you look around at them, you find yourself staring at one of them… he looks familiar and it suddenly returns to you that he’s the man who bumped into you outside your cafe–
“Y/N,” Seojun whispers harshly, “help is coming so run as soon as you get the chance, okay?”
You nod subtly, watching as the men part for one of them, undoubtedly their leader, to step closer. He’s a tall man, butch and quite frankly, frightening. His eyes are focused on Seojun and his upper lip curls as he sneers.
 “...All of that, for nothing.” His voice is emotionless and laced with wickedness, as he seems to delight in seeing life leaving the once healthy body in front of him.
“Oh shut up, Minjun,” Seojun gets out breathlessly, grimacing in pain as he does. 
Minjun laughs hollowly, coming closer still. “I’d love to see Park’s reaction to this, his favourite little pup won’t be crawling back to him tonight.”
Your hand tightens around your pistol but you remain still – even you aren’t stupid enough to think you can shoot this man without receiving multiple bullets in return.
“Just shoot me then,” Seojun mutters, shifting on his feet as he struggles to stay standing.
Minjun scoffs amusedly. “Not just yet. I’ve got questions for you first…” He looks your way and an icy shiver runs down your spine. “Who’s this?”
“I don’t know, this is the first house I found for shelter,” Seojun answers, his voice laced with desperation. “Just take me, she’s innocent.” 
Minjun pauses, his eyes lowering to the gun in your hand. “Innocent?” 
“Yes, she knows nothing.”
“I’ll be the judge of that,” Minjun says as he walks forward again, closing the distance.
“Minjun,” Seojun says, voice raised. “I’m here, I know everything you want to know, not her–”
As though an invisible fuse has been cut, Minjun loses his temper and throws a heavy punch to Seojun’s jaw, flooring him instantly. 
“Seojun,” you gasp, kneeling beside him as a raspy groan escapes him. Fear travels through your body in waves as you see blood beginning to pool out from beside him.
When you meet his gaze, there’s a distant glassiness to his eyes which stand out against his pale, clammy skin. 
You’ve been in plenty of fist fights before, you’ve been in real danger and have had to fight your way out of it, but this – being someone you care about – this is something entirely new to you and for the first time in a long time, you’re frightened. 
“She knows nothing, hm?” Minjun scoffs. “She clearly knows you.”
Reaching out for Seojun’s hand, you look at the man towering above you, ready to beg. “Please–”
“Y/N!” Siho’s familiar voice fills the air and you freeze.
She appears at the kitchen door, glock raised as she looks around wildly at all the men who are pointing their own right back at her. She clearly wasn’t expecting anything like this and her eyes find you and she looks at you fearfully. “What–”
“Siho, go,” your voice trembles as you call out to her, but it’s too late. Two shots pierce through the air and you watch as your friend drops dead to the floor in front of you. 
A hollowness fills your chest. “No,” you whisper, mindlessly releasing Seojun’s hand to move to her but before you can get anywhere, Minjun is kicking you hard in the chest and you get pushed back to the wall. Only now do you realise how hard you’re breathing, the shaky breaths causing your shoulders to rise as you feel your back sink against the wall. 
“Something you should know,” he says slowly, inspecting the shaft of his gun as he crouches in front of you almost mockingly after he just shot your friend, before he looks right at you. “I don't like being interrupted. Now, tell me who you are, and don’t lie.”
Minjun’s gaze is terrifying and intense; you can’t bring yourself to look at him so you close your eyes and turn your head away from him.
But he doesn’t take well to that so he draws his hand back and it lands on your face with a sharp sting.
Despite being afraid, you manage to turn your head towards him and goosebumps prickle your skin when he stares at you. 
His face is marred with deep lines and red marks, some fresh and some old. Half of one brow looks as though it’s been burnt off and his nose is so deformed it looks as though it has been broken over and over. 
“Answer me,” he growls with a piercing stare.
Before you can even answer, you hear the sound of a gun cocking next to you. Seojun has his gun aimed at Minjun but he’s lost too much blood, his mind disorientated as he tries to press the trigger.
“Ha!” Minjun laughs, effortlessly taking the gun free from his hand. “What an idiot.” He shakes his head, looking down at the gun before shrugging and pulling the trigger. 
“No!” you cry, body jerking backwards as you become paralysed at the sight of Seojun’s body going limp, his eyes becoming lifeless as his head rolls to the side and he moves no more. A choked sob escapes your throat but you don't even have a second to process it.
“Come here, darling.” Minjun places his hand on your shoulder gently. His other hand rests on your face and you shudder when you feel the callused thumb swipe the tears off your cheeks. “Look at me.” He speaks softly but you know better than to fall for that.
His finger hooks under your chin and he lifts your head up to make you look at him. When your eyes meet his, you freeze.
“Just tell me what you know, sweetheart, and we’ll let you go,” he coaxes, nodding his head with a malicious grin on his face. 
“I–I don’t know any-anything. Plea–“
Mjnjun’s fist crashes into your face as your body involuntarily jerks towards the floor. 
Pain sears through you, blinding you and all you can do is gasp from shock, feeling blood trickle down your skin. 
“I told you not to lie,” Minjun growls, dragging you up by your shoulders. You have no strength left to lift yourself or even try to resist, not that you would. 
“Now tell me, what do you know?” 
He shakes you violently as he speaks but you don’t respond, still adjusting to the pain which only worsens as the salty tears silently stream down your face. Now your breaths are uneven and with each draw, you feel more suffocated, unable to even think past the image of Seojun’s lifeless body. 
Your silence serves as an answer for Minjun. He punches you straight in the ribs and watches emotionless as you keel over in pain. A cry escapes you, though you don’t feel it – your mind feels like a completely separate entity from your body. 
So when you hear the sound of feet scuffling and Dani’s voice crying out your name, you can only stay hunched over on the floor.
“Caught her trying to contact someone, boss,” one of the men holding her says gruffly, tossing her phone to Minjun. 
Dani looks across the room, her eyes doubling back to where Siho lies dead in a pool of her own blood. You can see the fear and regret in her eyes as she meets your gaze. “I’m sorry,” she mouths.
You don’t have time to do anything before Minjun gives a curt nod in the direction of the door, and then she’s being dragged away from you by four guards needed to restrain her. Seconds later, a single shot sounds. 
It leaves you feeling numb, unable to do anything as Minjun drags you to your feet by your collar. 
“Two guards and this one…” he kicks Seojun. “You’re clearly someone. What’s your name?” he hisses, his patience clearly having run out long ago – the three dead bodies in your home prove that.
Words don’t leave your mouth and your gaze falls helplessly to Siho’s body. Tears well in your eyes and a harsh sob escapes from your throat.  
“Fucking useless,” Minjun muttters, pushing you against the wall. “Search her,” he commands one of his men beside him.
At this point, you don’t even remember the little device in your pocket. You’re simply numb from everything that’s happened in the last ten minutes and when your eyes land on Seojun’s body and his glassy orbs staring emptily at the floor, you just want to scream.
But you don’t. You physically can’t. 
Hands pat you down, starting along your arms, slipping inside your shirt to feel under your arms, around your back, groping your chest, all around your abdomen, and up and down your legs. You remain entirely helpless as they do so. 
Then they start searching your pockets.
… Your gaze moves to the door, where Dani lies outside.
First your cardigan pockets. Empty.
… Across from you is Siho, the glock she was going to use to save you resting ahead of her.
Then your front jeans pockets. Empty. 
… Your head turns, meeting the vacant gaze of Seojun – you feel your stomach flip and a spark of indignation catches in your throat. Subconsciously, your fists curl.
Then your back jeans pockets. A hand pulls out the small black device and he holds it up in front of him, directly between you and Minjun who raises his brow in mock amusement.
“What a pretty little liar you are?” he snickers, stepping closer to take the flash drive in his hands. 
You don’t respond, but collapse to the floor as the men let go of you. From fear? Exhaustion? Grief? You don’t know. 
Then Minjun comes towards you, pulling a small knife from his back pocket. “You just wasted my time, beautiful…” He grabs you by your throat and pulls you up to your feet. 
The feeling of his strong hand pressing into your larynx returns you to your senses as the real threat of being killed looms over you. 
Minjun trails the sharp edge of the knife along your cheek, down towards your neck. He leans forward and speaks low. “I don‘t take well to that…” The stench of him fills your nostrils, and the knife presses against your skin. One more glance at Seojun, and suddenly, you snap.
Your knee comes up hard and you grab a hold of Minjun’s wrist, yanking it back with all your strength to twist his body in front of you. 
“Sir!” 
The voices of his men shouting drown out his low groans as he now stands, disarmed and held in a tight lock in front of you. You're holding him by his arm twisted backwards around his back and your other hand grabs the gun at his waist, a SIG Sauer pistol – it feels secure in your hand and you press the barrel to Minjun’s head. Adrenaline starts to surge through you as your mind races, completely forgetting about Minjun’s other hand hanging free at his side.
“Don’t move or I’ll shoot him,” you warn his men, backing up towards the window.  
Minjun chuckles a low chuckle. “Will you now?”
“Yes,” you answer through gritted teeth, moving back with him towards the back door. 
“Liar.”
“Don’t tempt me,” you hiss, anger swelling in your chest.
Minjun laughs again, coming to a stop despite your grip on him. “You think you’re smart, don’t you? I know you won’t do it.”
“Oh yeah?” Fingers digging tightly into his skin, you drag his head back and shoot him straight in the calf. “You don’t know shit about me.”
Minjun falls to his knees, a string of swear words leaving his mouth and his weight pulls you down with him. “Your first mistake was fucking lying to me,” he heaves, fingers grabbing your jaw tightly. 
A sharp pain shoots down your wrist. You cry out as Minjun’s blade cuts through your skin, the gun almost dropping from your hand as you grab your bleeding wrist.
He tries to retrieve the gun, struggling to get back to his feet but you step back just in time.
“You’re lucky I can’t kill you right here,” Minjun snarls, facing you as he pushes away the guards who try to help him up. “But once Lee is done with you, I swear I’m going to fucki–“
Bang. 
“FUCK!” Minjun staggers, falling backwards with his hand pressed against his shoulder, very close to his chest where blood spreads staining his white shirt crimson. 
Another shot sounds and one of Minjun’s men goes down. Then another, and another. 
“Park,” Minjun growls, pure rage flashing in his eyes. “I’ll fucking kill you!” Despite the two wounds to his shoulder and leg, he gets up and grabs a gun from the closest man. “What the fuck are you waiting for?!” he yells. “Shoot the bastards!”
Within a second, the air is filled with the sounds of shots firing and you drop to the ground, crawling as fast as you can out of the way. Their shots are returned from outside but the majority of your house is surrounded entirely by trees so you can’t see where they’re coming from. 
As you go, you spot the flash drive on the floor and Seojun’s face comes to mind. He died for whatever is on there. Reaching out, you grab the device without a second's hesitation. When you get behind the kitchen island, you quickly stuff the drive in your pocket. Pain still shoots down your arm and there’s blood dripping from you, staining the tiles. When you look up, you realise there’s blood everywhere.
“Show me your fucking face, Park!” Minjun rages, shooting all over the place, but he’s also bleeding heavily now, the front of his shirt rapidly being dyed red. His men are dying all around him as they shoot aimlessly out the window and you snatch a gun from the closest one, looking up just in time to see the last man fall. There’s only you and Minjun left.
He curses as the last man goes down, head whipping towards you. Drawing a pocket knife out from his waist, he lunges towards you but you slide backwards on the floor, aiming the gun at his head.
“Don’t,” you warn breathlessly.
His upper lip curls. “Fucking bitch.” He holds his gun up to you. “You’re useless to me.”
There’s no question that he’s about to shoot and you’re ready to do the same, but before that can happen, three men dressed in all black suits come barging into your kitchen and another two through the window. 
Minjun shouts in frustration, shooting at you which you narrowly avoid by sliding behind the kitchen island. As you go, you see the tallest of the three men disarm Minjun with ease. 
“You’re too late,” Minjun says, voice low as he turns around.
One of them steps forward, a man whose features look incredibly familiar to you. 
He aims his gun straight at Minjun’s head. The look on his face is fierce and his gaze is steady. “Where is he?”
Minjun laughs weakly, the energy slowly draining from his body. 
The man’s jaw tenses and he kicks Minjun's knee out from beneath him. His movements are sharp, agile — it’s clear to you that he’s done this many times before. 
Minjun falls to his knees, his laugh subsiding into a weak raspy breath. He looks up with no fear and no remorse. “I told you, you’re too late.” He looks in the direction of Seojun’s body, and the man’s gaze follows.
His mouth twitches and you can see the grief that fills his face as he stares at the body, but it only takes a few seconds for it to change into unmistakable anger. In a split second, his arm is raised and he shoots Minjun in his thigh.
At first, Minjun cries out, falling to his side as blood pools from him rapidly. Then he laughs remorselessly like a madman. “Which of your boys will be next, Park?”
Familiarity hits you there and then – Park Jimin. As you watch him step towards Minjun, you realise how different this man looks from the young boy you once played tag with in your home.
Jimin doesn’t miss his mark as he throws a hard punch across Minjun’s face, nor does he wait a second before punching him again… and again… and again. Your stomach turns as Minjun still laughs between each throw, almost taunting Jimin to keep going, even when he’s choking on his own blood. 
Gathering a fistful of hair, Jimin pulls Minjun’s head back and pulls out his gun. He holds it to his head.
Minjun coughs, blood spattering Jimin’s crisp white shirt. “Do it,” he rasps. “An eye for an eye, eh, Park?” Minjun chuckles, the sound getting lost as he coughs weakly again. 
Jimin however, goes incredibly still, gaze piercing into Minjun. 
“Your old man knew more than you ever will–” he coughs again, breaths slowing down– “it’s taking you too long to learn, boy. The Lee’s will come for every fucking person you care about, make you watch as they bleed out in front of ya,” he sneers, licking blood off his lips. “Then they’ll kill you like it’s nothing.”
Of the many emotions showing on Jimin’s face, fear isn’t one of them.
Unnervingly calm, Jimin speaks. “I’m not going to kill you.” Tracing the barrel of his gun down Minjun’s cheek, he pushes it under his throat. “No, that would be too easy.” 
Jimin holds out his gun and with immediate understanding, one of his men, with dark curls steps forward and takes the gun and place a small Gerber knife in his hand instead.
Grip tightening on on his hair, Jimin lifts the man and turns his head in the direction of Seojun, ignoring the grunts of pain from him. Looking away from Seojun, Jimin keeps Minjun’s head facing that way as he speaks.  “You don’t deserve an easy way out.” Slowly, he pushes the knife into Minjun’s shoulder and twists.
Minjun tries to keep down the pain but fails to do so, falling to his knees again.
“See?” Jimin looks down, eyes deadly focused on Minjun. “Just like this.” He twists deeper. “I’m going to cut you apart, and then piece you back together. And I’ll do it over and over.”
“Then what?” Minjun rasps.
Jimin pulls the knife out, throwing it to the floor in front of Minjun. Blood splatters on the tiles and Minjun’s head lowers. 
“You’ll see.”
With another wordless gesture, the two tallest men drag Minjun away somewhere and out of sight.
Once they’ve left, the room is silent aside from Jimin’s slow steady breaths. His gaze travels towards where Seojun’s body lies and you watch him carefully as he walks across the room, dropping his gun to the floor to kneel beside Seojun. 
Jimin’s expression softens and he gently takes Seojun’s hand into his own, and just like that, you’re reminded of the boy you once knew. He brings the back of Seojun’s palm to his mouth and he places a kiss on his skin. As he lowers his hand to rest over his chest, his round eyes water, but he blinks once and it’s gone. 
“Jimin.” One of his men, a tall, slender man with chestnut hair, calls his name. When Jimin looks at him, his gaze immediately lands on you.
You instinctively rise at the same time he does, raising the gun you hold in your hand. 
Yes, you knew Jimin once, but many years have passed and you’d be stupid not to be wary.
“Don’t come near me.” You swallow hard, having to press your back against the wall as you feel incredibly weak, but you can’t let this show.
Jimin says nothing as he takes a small step, eyes locking with yours and for a split second you almost lower your gun when you see something familiar in those brown eyes of his. 
Then one of his other men, a well built man with long dark curls held back in a bun, draws your attention. “Miss,” he says politely. “We just want to help.”
“I don’t need your help, just get out of my house.” Your voice tightens as you look at Siho’s body. You force your gaze away.
Jimin takes another step, watching you carefully. “You…” he murmurs, hesitating as a soft frown appears on his face before he shakes his head once. “Why did Seojun come here?” He asks, voice softer than when he spoke with Minjun, but the question is enough to anger you and you stare at him in bewilderment.
Pushing off the wall, you walk towards him and a loud click echoes in the room as you release the safety with your thumb.
In return, three guns are cocked and aimed at you. 
Jimin, however, doesn’t even blink. 
“Put the gun down, miss.” The same man addresses you calmly with his finger hovering over the trigger, glancing between Jimin and you. 
Now it’s you who doesn’t falter. “I don’t know why Seojun came here,” you say calmly, “and I don’t know who those men were. I’ve only ever spoken to him a few times and he never told me anything about himself. I know nothing.”
Admittedly, that’s a lie, but until you have more answers yourself, you’re not saying anything.
Jimin is quiet but his gaze is steady. “How do I know you’re telling the truth?”
“You don’t,” you answer quietly. “But it’s my word or nothing.”
A beat of silence passes and it feels like an eternity. Your gun remains aimed at Jimin and his men hold theirs up to you, but you know they won’t shoot – there’s something sure in Jimin’s gaze as you both stand there in the middle of the room staring at each other, something that tells you you’re safe. 
He doesn’t say anything at all as he looks past the barrel of your gun to hold your gaze, and for a moment you wonder if he recognises you just like you’ve recognised him, but it can’t be. 
In the years since your father died, your grandma has done everything to protect you, including changing your surname and moving towns. Jimin, however, had a foot in the limelight for as long as his father was alive which is why you still manage to recognise the grown man before you. 
Just as you begin to feel a wave of weakness pass over you again, Jimin looks at the man closest to him, a broad man with jet black hair. With the smallest shake of his head, his men stand down.
You let out a slow breath, lowering your own gun as Jimin turns back to you. 
He looks down at your wrist and the smallest wrinkle appears between his brow. “You’re bleeding.”
“I’ll be fine,” you mutter, hand closing over your throbbing wrist. 
“You’ve lost a lot of blood.”
You almost huff impatiently. “It’s not all mine.”
Jimin pauses to look down at your thigh. “You need someone to look at that–now.”
Confused, your eyes follow and your stomach coils when you see a gash on your thigh, the blood darkening the denim of your jeans. You don’t even know when that happened.
Clenching your fists, you look back up. “I said I'll be fine.”
Contrary to your words, when you turn away a little too quickly, everything blurs and spins. Just as everything starts to go dark, you stumble backwards and Jimin is moving towards you. 
The last thing you feel is warm hands closing around you, lowering you gently to the ground.
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note. thank you so much for reading! please share your thoughts with me and if you have any questions ask awayyy! (especially as it only gets more intense :) the action should take a bit of a break though as we’re introduced to and learn more about the characters 😋 (also writing action is hard 😭)
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hollyhomburg · 3 days ago
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Before I Leave You (Pt.77)
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(sneek peek) (Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)
Summary: Tae and Hobi help Yoongi during your first wave of heat.
Tags: heat sex, breeding kink, pregnancy kink, fertility kink, Dom! Yoongi, foursome, fluffy, no hurt just comfort, alot of smut but it's also very loving, coming prematurely, breeding kink, cum play, sleepy sex, mommy kink, talking her through it, dirty talk, exhibitionism voeyeurisim, teasing, flirting, biting,
W/c: 11.3k
A/n: thank you guys for being so tolerant of my brief absense, i didn't intend to take so long to update this but unfortunately sometimes living through historical events can be really tough to get through.
Previous part- Masterlist - First part
You laugh until you hiss, curling to the side just a little, a wave racking through you. Burning and stinging from your stomach outwards.
Yoongi stills, one hand on your knee the other pressed to your stomach flat, eyes wide. Tae lets your wrists go so you can clutch at your stomach. Holding your face through it. "oh my little honey, don't worry, we'll make it better, shh just-" She's a little more panicky than the rest of them are. Hobi's hand is just hard on your shoulder, knuckles white, expression stricken but unsure.
Yoongi holds your stomach too. Alarmed by your trembling. "Are you- do you need-“ a knot, hovers on the edge of his tongue.
But you just blink. “Yoongi- it's too much- it burns- Sore- so sore here” You touch your stomach gently, but it's so sensitive it still makes you hiss.
but after a moment you relax, stretching back out in the nest. breathing heavy until you aren't until the cramping, the aching need want filled need to be filled in your head quiets.
Yoongi's fingers swirl on your stomach, gently. it's sensitive, but it actually does make you feel better. “You ran, do you want us to wait for Namjoon or-" You’re already shaking your head no when Yoongi cuts off. settling back against the nest, letting your legs flop open so that he can shuffle forward closer.
You don't wonder why Yoongi mentions Namjoon. He's the pack alpha, and the right to breed you first in heat is his as dictated by old laws and rules and all manner or propriety.
But Namjoon is not your mate and he's not like that. He cares about your wants first. His own ego is very far down on his list of priorities (probably ranks just after Noodle's wellbeing in terms of Namjoon's pack alpha priorities. Dominance is its own kind of submission)
And, judging by Jin's snarling from the other room- he'll be preoccupied for at least the next hour. You don't know if you can wait that long. A whine drips out of you, a sound small and weak.
Hobi shuffles closer to you. Bare-chested, his red shorts looking tight. Looking unsure. "You did run, do you not want-" us, does not come out.
You shift, futile trying to get comfortable, it's impossible with the weight of your instincts pinning you down. “Nah, just ran cuz it’s fun. Not cuz I didn’t want you to fuck me.”
Yoongi huffs, his anxiety dissipating, fond with it, fingers itching up your thighs, parting them just a little so that he can shuffle forward closer to you. Until you can feel the heat from his tummy against yours.
You can feel so much. Your whole body one big nerve ending. You can feel the slight fluff and softness of the peach fuzz on his tummy dragging against yours as he gets closer. The feel of his slender but strong fingers circling your ankles. All of it.
You like this, you always like it when Yoongi's close.
“Glad we cleared that up, it’s not like I can’t literally see you slicking up but-“ you laugh and try and swat at him. He drops one of your ankles to catch your hand and tangles it with his for good measure.
A small smile hovers on the edge of his lips. He searches your face, smiling at what he sees- your dopey smile and endeared indignation. The heat might be new, but this is so familiar his heart aches with it.
“If you’re gonna tease me while I’m in heat can you at least make it good?” Your breath goes heavy. Warm and sweet, fluffing over him. Everything; the sweetness to your scent, the ruddiness of your knees and stomach, the messy fluff of your hair over the pastel pillow, the relaxed sprawl of your body, a siren song for Yoongi.
Above you- Tae and Hobi stay quiet. Just watching, Tae drags a lock of your hair away from your face. Patient while you and yoongi flirt. “I thought you liked my teasing.”
Your tone sounds petulant even to you, “I do just not-”
Yoongi presses your knees apart, up towards your chest putting you on display and bare. abrumptly cutting off your words as you let out a broken moan. He puts a bit more force behind it than usual, But you feel yourself clench and his gaze flickers down.
The smile on his face widens just a bit, and you hiccup through the shudder that rocks through you. Your body burns, your stomach churns, your skin simmers where he touches craving for more more more.
A breeding press. That's what Yoongi's just put you into. knees to your chest, your sensitive heat slit ripe and wet between your thighs, ready for the taking. a breeding press infront of two alpha's, infront of Tae and Hobi, watching with wide dark eyes.
“Hold her.” Yoongi’s command is not snapped or growled out but Hobi and Tae follow suit regardless. Hobi fumbles, grabbing one wrist and Tae grabs the other.
Boneless. Ready for breeding. Settled. It’s a bit of a strange show of dominance. But inside, Yoongi isn’t surprised that you needed it. to be held down and puppeted and propped. To know that they’re in control before you let your alpha's breed you.
He says your alphas- but he's the only one you're looking at. The only one you're whining for.
It’s hard to articulate your hands or your mind, tongue wrapped around a sound that can only be an endless whimper. Tae leans low when you try to squirm again. Her teeth nip at your ear, a shock to your system that makes you leak a fresh gush of slick half onto Yoongi's lap.
You have to be spilling and dripping by now. You try and press your legs back together and hide but Yoongi keeps you spread.
“No pup, settle.”
Coming Saturday November 23rd at 5pm EST (Time Zone Adjustments Below)
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namfinessed · 14 days ago
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and...cut! - p.jm.
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genre: fluff, very mild angst (13.6k)
summary: the last time you saw jimin, you were pathetically deep in a one-sided love while he wasn't even at the shallow edge, that was when you were on the stage, dancing and acting together for hundreds to see. now, you are grown, you like to think you're cool but when jimin comes back to your life, you are just as pathetically deep, once again, in a one-sided love.
masterlist masterpost
you were breathless when the lights cut out, the crowd immediately broke into loud applause and your teammates gathered around you to congratulate you but as good as all of it felt, your eyes searched for him, desperately, more desperately than you would ever admit to anyone else.
and when you finally caught him, he was leaving the stage, he didn’t turn back like you hoped he would, he didn’t congratulate you like you hoped he would and you swallowed your tears.
but it was okay.
it was going to be okay.
you would see him in class in a few days and everything would fall into place.
for now, you grab the friends around you and squeeze them, hoping everyone mistakes your tears for happy ones.
-
you like to think that you’re cool.
you didn’t cry when you broke up with your first boyfriend, you didn’t crawl back to him and never begged anyone for a second chance. you set a ten-minute timer to cry for your second boyfriend and when he called you right after breaking up with you to ask how you were feeling, you told him you were reading a book and cut the call.
so, yes, you are cool.
maybe a little too cool because now, you’ve been single for two years and your friends take more offense to that fact than you do.
“we are just worried babe, you don’t seem to like anyone,” mia whispered with her hands in her boyfriend’s hands, as if it was some big secret.
“you don’t have to be,” you gulp down your drink, ignoring all the looks your friends and their boyfriends give you.
they didn’t have to be, you were perfectly fine the way you were.
you were totally okay with sitting at the end of the table with an empty seat next to you, you were okay with listening to your friends be all romantic with their boyfriends, you were okay with everyone.
sure, sometimes you wish you had someone to call at night and talk nonsense with, and yes, it would be nice to have someone you can call yours and someone who would sit next to you as if any other place was unacceptable.
but those were all things you could adjust with, all things you have grown to get used to.
“but seriously, you don’t like a single person we set you up with, i know you have commitment issues but i don’t think you’re even trying,” megan, who you could always count on to give you a reality check, spoke up with you guessed it, her boyfriend’s arms around her.
next to her, faye pursed her lips and turned away from the conversation to say something to her boyfriend, you were at least grateful that she didn’t add to the advice.
“you were single till two months ago, don’t act like you’re some love guru,” you bite back and the whole table falls silent and you hate it.
you hate that you have to sit here and listen to them advising you as they’ve figured it all out.
you hate that you look bitter as fuck right now.
you hate that, just because you don’t have a partner, everyone thinks you’re miserable and lonely.
you hate that you probably are miserable and lonely.
“okay, let’s look at the menu, what does everyone want?” mia chimes in, the mom of the group, the problem fixer where glaringly you are the problem at this table, and everyone is gracious enough to follow suit, and check the menus.
except you.
“i think i’m going to leave actually, i feel pretty tired,” you pick up your bag and immediately everyone starts protesting, “you know i didn’t mean it in that way,” megan grabs your hand with softer eyes and you nod, “i didn’t either, i’ll meet you guys another time.”
and just like that, you’re not mad at her anymore.
“please stay, it’s been so long since we’ve met like this,” faye whispers next and you want to scream that it could’ve been just you and the girls, that you hated their boyfriends coming as extended versions of themselves but she did stay quiet, she didn’t encourage your friends shitting on you so you sit back down.
“sorry, i’m late,” your ears pick up on a new voice and you instinctively look up.
you almost kill yourself on the spot.
“hey guys, this is jimin, my friend, i hope it’s okay if he joins us,” noah, megan’s boyfriend gets up and hugs his friend who very gladly returns the hug and nods at everyone at the table as they introduce themselves.
but you already, unfortunately, know jimin.
just not from here, or from any recent period in your life but from a buried piece of school history.
and when he gets to you, you mumble your name and immediately look back at the menu.
what was he doing here?
did he recognize you?
you hope the fuck not because there wouldn’t be a bigger embarrassment than him remembering that he rejected you even before you could ever ask him out.
but when he sits next to you, you stiffen up, mutter out some dish’s name, and pretend to be very interested in the shape of your plate.
why did he smell so good?
“oh yeah, i think she went to the same school,” you hear faye’s voice and immediately, your hands clench on your lap.
“really?” and his voice isn’t familiar or unfamiliar, you know it’s been years, and voices, sounds, and faces change but jimin’s voice always had a certain warmth that no one else seemed to have.
and he still had it.
he carried that warmth everywhere.
especially in his eyes, which were looking right at you when you lifted your head up.
“i’m sorry?” you clear your throat and faye answers, “he’s from your school,” and you make a ‘is that so?’ face and quietly nod along.
“which year did you graduate in?” jimin speaks from your left, you swear he’s recognized you already when he leans into your figure, and god, if that didn’t make you want to shoot yourself.
“2015,” you say and then grab your wine glass, keeping it close to your mouth so that you don’t have to speak.
“oh same!”
you fucking know!
he is delighted of course and the smile on his face still makes your face red.
and that knowledge only twists your guts further.
“that’s great,” you dare to glance briefly to nod at him and then turn back to everyone else.
“okay.” he purses his lips and looks away.
fuck.
you were being rude.
it didn’t seem like anyone really minded cause they continued with their conversations but you and jimin were now deathly silent.
you had to fix this.
you can’t have him hate you in the present too.
“i know you,” is apparently the best you can do and you want to smack yourself when he raises his eyebrows at you because, from a supposed stranger, that was creepy and mildly horrifying to hear.
“oh?”
“yeah, you were in the cinderella play in school, the prince,” and it was out.
now you have to hold your breath and see if he laughs in your face.
“i was,” and then he cranes his neck to look at you.
really look at you.
you wait.
you know he’s going to hate you when he figures it out, you know that you’re going to kill yourself at this table.
but he keeps looking, eyebrows narrowing and dropping, eyes scanning your every feature, and you know he’s putting his earlier pieces together, that it’s finally clicking for him.
his smile disappears.
his eyes lose all warmth.
you can tell the second that it clicks for him.
“you were cinderella.”
you can’t hide, you can’t look away, you can’t run, all you can do is meet his cold and sharp gaze.
and nod.
he looks away, puts his head down, and lets out the heaviest sigh.
you try not to reach for the knife on the table.
-
the rest of the dinner was…awkward.
so painfully awkward.
once in a while, the conversation would turn to you both and you would force yourself to say a few words before going mute whereas jimin enjoyed the conversations only to fall mute whenever you spoke.
it was embarrassing, the hot kind of embarrassment that paralyzed your entire body, every movement you made felt unnatural and forced, every time your hand moved, jimin would jerk away and towards the end, you just folded your hands on your lap and refused to be mobile.
if anyone noticed anything, they didn’t say a word.
“we should still get a few more drinks,” megan insists outside the restaurant and you twist your entire face at her, “what?” she shrugs her shoulders and you look away, panic rising in your throat.
two hours beside jimin was torture enough.
any more and you would probably combust.
“actually, i agree,” jimin steps away from his conversation with noah and for a split second, you catch him looking at you but you turn away, though the split second still leaves your knees shaking.
“i would love to host you guys at my place if everyone is comfortable,” he offers graciously, a smile reaching his eyes, warmth so bright and inviting on his face but you know that the invitation didn’t extend to you.
and the same way you fell head over heels for him, you see everyone around you falling for him, their eyes soften, they all nod at him and start cheering at the long night ahead of them and you, well, you just want to go home, knock a few teeth out and escape from the country with a fake passport.
but everyone turns to you, your silence is a bit too loud in their chaos and you stammer as all of their faces pick up in anticipation.
“i’m gonna turn in for the night, you guys go ahead, have fun!” you raise your fists in cheer, cringe internally at yourself, swallow that shame, and start waving goodbye and turning around to leave.
and you were truly so close.
so, so close.
your cab was booked, the night was done and you exhaled in relief.
until you hear steps coming towards you, “come, it will be fun,” jimin’s voice was still new, a sound that almost knocked you over and you shifted on your feet, “you don’t want me there.”
“did i tell you that?”
“you don’t need to, jimin,” you hate how breathless you sound when you say his name.
jimin tilts his head at you, eyebrows furrowing again and you want to duck and crawl away from his sight, “i would lov-“
and your cab pulls up.
you clear your throat, “thanks for inviting me, but i have to go, goodnight,” and you step away towards your cab, not waiting for his response.
as your cab pulls away, you avert your eyes away from the pavement where he stands, eyebrows furrowed still, and eyes following the tires of the cab.
you take a deep breath in.
you would never see your first crush again.
and that was probably for the best.
-
sixth grade was life-changing for you.
it was the first time you realized you could feel so much for one person, even if you never intended it to happen that way.
you didn’t even know someone called jimin existed in school until he walked into your practice room, with a head full of thick, soft hair, with this smile that had you frowning, with this walk so confident which was uncommon in guys your age.
everyone was busy being cool, everyone was busy being something they were not but jimin was always just him.
when your drama teacher announced him as the prince in your drama, you nodded and looked away, passing him the script later and walking away.
liking jimin was never part of the plan, liking jimin wasn’t something you ever saw as a possibility, you always thought his personality was too much, too loud, and that he was a little too naïve and a little too bubbly.
but soon, he became your prince, as if every terrible cliché in the world had to come true, he became everything you would ever want in someone.
-
days passed, you watched the photos on your friend’s instagram from the night that you never ended up staying for, and you felt a jolt of joy every time jimin was in their pictures.
he still looked fucking gorgeous, he still smiled with his entire face, and he was still tall and moved with a confidence that guys, even at your age now, usually lacked.
it was a shame that he hated you.
you sighed, put your phone down, and waited for your nephew to burst out of his preschool class. as an aunt, you were constantly on babysitter duties, those duties included picking and dropping him places, taking him out to the park, attending parent-teacher meetings if your sister was too busy like she was today.
it was exhausting at times but your nephew was your baby too.
speaking of your baby, sunoo runs out the door full-speed, eyes darting everywhere before they land on you, you’ll always remember his smile as he heads straight towards you, your heart always picks up and immediately your arms are open to him.
“hey baby,” you mumble into his hair and he giggles, holding onto you tightly and you stand up, with him still koala wrapped around you.
when you look down again, a little girl is staring up at both of you with large eyes and you are immediately concerned.
where are her parents?
why is she alone?
“bubba, do you know your friend here?” you ask sunoo, who, to your relief, nods aggressively and signals to be put down.
and as soon as his feet are on the ground, he hands you his bag to hold her hand and your eyebrows jump up your forehead. sunoo was a very shy kid, he didn’t talk much to kids in the class, and his world was only your family.
so, when they both smile at each other with half their teeth still growing, your heart warms and you bend down to their height, “hello sunoo’s friend, can i know your name?” you hold out your hand and the girl shyly reaches out to take it, “arin,” she whispers before putting her hand back in sunoo’s and you giggle at the sight.
they were adorable.
“is it your first day here, arin?” you don’t remember seeing her and she nods, “this is my new school.”
“ah okay, sunoo, do you want to head inside for the meeting? arin can come in as well, yeah?” you look at them and hold out your hands to each of them which they happily take and you almost collapse when you turn around.
“you’ve got to be kidding me.”
jimin stood, a few feet away from you, with a pink backpack held loosely in his hands and your face immediately dropped.
this can’t be real.
this cannot be your tuesday morning.
this cannot be your life at all.
“what are you doing here?”
“what are you doing here?” you stare at him pointedly with your arms across your chest and he rolls his eyes, “that’s my niece next to you, she started here today,” and at that, you bend a little to see arin’s face and surely, the resemblance was there.
full cheeks.
and warm eyes.
god loved to punish you.
“oh.” and arin smiles at you, you smile back a little hesitantly and turn to see jimin who’s eyebrows have furrowed deeper than ever.
“yeah,” he looks exasperated at your presence and you try not to get hurt over it, “this is my nephew, by the way,” you point to sunoo, not knowing what else to do or say, and he waves at jimin with a toothy smile and like magic, jimin’s entire face melts into the most beautiful smile.
oh, fuck him.
he starts walking over and you clutch sunoo’s bag tightly, watching as his feet fall one after the other, watching as he completely avoids looking at you when he bends down to ruffle sunoo’s hair and press a kiss to arin’s head.
you hate when men are nice to kids, it makes it so much harder to despise them.
“oh, sunoo’s aunt! i didn’t know you came with your boyfriend,” you freeze at the sound of sunoo’s teacher coming from the hallway and jimin freezes too as she starts quickly walking over to you.
marjorie was an older woman who loved sunoo and you, she was the only teacher you trusted completely and she was also a bit chatty.
this was a live nightmare.
“he’s so handsome, good for you,” she slaps her hand on your arm while gushing at jimin and you, once again, wish to change your identity and immigrate to some unknown island.
“we’re not-“
“that’s not-“
and you both pause to glare at each other with pure venom in your eyes.
he may have been your first crush but he was insufferable and you didn’t need someone else to think that you were together with him and his horrid personality.
jimin probably thought you were enjoying this, people mistaking you to be a couple, just like in school, but he was so wrong, he wasn’t nearly as cute as he was in school.
marjorie clears her throat and stares at you with anticipation, you hate to break her bubble but, “i don’t know who he is marjorie, i think he’s related to your new student here,” you point to arin and she starts looking between the both of you in confusion and jimin extends his hand to her, “i’m arin’s uncle, i’m here for her parent-teacher meeting.”
she nods with a smile, taking his hand graciously, “oh that’s lovely, arin’s mom did say her uncle was coming today, come in, come in, you too, sunoo’s aunt,” and starts walking ahead of the both of you into the classrooms.
you and jimin follow her in, you watch as he takes in the school and the classrooms and smiles at the artwork made by the children all over the walls, you look away with an irritated scowl.
why did he pretend to be some children-loving, kind jesus when he was absolutely vile to you?
“by the way, you two look so good together, it’s a shame you’re not a couple,” marjorie smiles at the two of you and you both nod stiffly at her which seems to delight her as she walks into a room.
you and jimin glare at each other one last time before following her in.
-
sunoo is still holding arin’s hand as you and jimin awkwardly follow the two of them outside the school, the parent-teacher meeting was done, thankfully, only two other teachers assumed you were a couple but was that really a win?
“okay sunoo, why don’t you say bye to your friend and we can go home?” you step forward from the slow, uncomfortable pace set by you and jimin, sunoo pouts and tightens his hand around arin’s which makes you frown, and look at jimin who was also observing the scene in front of them.
“but arin,” he starts tearing up, his face scrunching up and your panic rises, “it’s okay baby, you’ll see her in class tomorrow and every day after,” you try to calm him down, “it’s saturday tomorrow,” he whimpers and you wince, “well, it’s only two days bub, i’m sure arin wants to go home too,” and arin starts pouting too, “no.”
wow, she looked even more like jimin when she pouted.
you look at jimin again helplessly and he also seems to be panicking, at least you weren’t alone.
“sunoo, arin,” he bent down, “you two are in the same class, you will see each other again soon, for now, everyone should go home after class,” jimin’s tone was strict but still soft enough not to trigger any tears but just when you think he’s a better guardian than you, arin huffs and throws her bag on the floor, “no!”
you almost join the bag to laugh on the floor at the shock in jimin’s face.
“she never does this,” jimin says with his mouth still wide open as he gets up and you raise your eyebrows, “i think she gets it from you, the drama of it all, it’s cute, don’t worry,” and he glares at you.
“kids, for today, we have to go home, another day, i’m sure we can do something,” you try to appease them and jimin scoffs next to you, making you narrow your eyes.
“wouldn’t you love that?” your mouth falls open as his eyes roll back in irritation.
the fucking gall this man has.
“shut the fu-“
your colorful words are interrupted by sunoo and arin, who are so in sync already, that they begin their sniffing and subsequent loud cries together.
you immediately shut up to meet jimin’s eyes in horror as both of you see the kids melt into a puddle of tears before you.
“okay, okay! what do you want?” jimin is the first to give in and you want to smack him on the head, you should never give in to kids, that was the rule, you should always wait for their meltdown to finish and then bribe them with something less than what they want.
“seriously?” you give him a dirty look.
“i hate to see her cry,” he whispers to you and if it were anyone else, you would gush, to be honest, you were gushing, but you were also hiding it really well.
“playdate!” it’s like they never cried at all, children were truly magical.
you stare at jimin, waiting for him to respond because if you guys agreed to the playdate, you were also agreeing to spend the next few hours together.
and you didn’t want to be the one to agree to that, it was bad enough that he thought you were getting a kick out of meeting him like this.
he finally lifts his head to look at you, you shrug at him with your heart beating thunderously against your chest, you almost place your hand on it to calm it down but it only gets louder when jimin smiles at you, “sure, that would be fun.”
-
“yay!” sunoo and arin burst into jimin’s house, throwing their shoes and bags at the doorstep to wander off into the house and you are left with jimin, who just like you, would rather be anywhere else.
“thanks for hosting, we’ll do it next time,” you mumble while shrugging your coat off and he smirks, “if you want to see me again, you can just say that.”
you throw your coat on his face and stomp into the house, letting go of any politeness or manners that you would usually have and his giggles float into the air around you, making you scowl.
if he wanted to behave like a pig, he would be treated like one.
“i meant it though, sunoo doesn’t talk to anyone so it was nice to see him bond with arin, but i won’t be the one hosting it, it would be my sister, so no one’s dying to see you, settle down,” you sit down on the sofa, keeping your back straight and legs neatly crossed over the other, and scanned the house that you’ve only seen on instagram till now.
it was a nice house, cosy and bright and definitely expensive.
“arin doesn’t usually talk to anyone either so works for both of us.”
“but what if i wanted to see you?” he joins you on the couch and you roll your eyes, “can you stop with that nonsense?”
“it’s not nonsense, just a question,” jimin shrugs, “tea or coffee?” and you’re appalled at his skills of diverting a conversation, “green tea, if you have it, thanks,” and he laughs, walking into the kitchen, “you know, you don’t have to be so formal with me, we know each other,” and you squirm in your seat.
“i know you’d prefer it if we didn’t,” and jimin pops his head out of the kitchen, “what makes you think that?”
“seriously?”
was he dumb or were you overthinking this?
you get up and walk over to the kitchen where jimin stands, in the simple t-shirt and jeans under his coat, and he looks unjustly attractive in that bland outfit.
“did you forget school or something?” you ask again and he shakes his head, handing you a mug of steaming green tea, “i haven’t forgotten anything, i’m very sharp in case you didn’t notice already,” and you have to let out a groan at his tone.
“i know you hate me, jimin, you don’t have to sugarcoat anything just because we’re older now,” you take a sip, appreciating the light sweetness in the green tea, “did you add honey?”
“nope, cinnamon and i don’t hate you, where the fuck did you get that?” he looks at you as if you’re insane, as if you’ve imagined the times he ignored you in school, as if you’ve imagined him smiling at everyone but you during drama practice, as if you’ve imagined him leaving the stage without even looking at you.
was this what people called ‘gaslighting’?
“um you were an asshole to me and an absolute angel to everyone else,” you try to sound cool and casual about the whole thing but you were dying a little inside about having to have this conversation.
“when?”
“always.”
“no, but when exactly?”
“are you really going to make me say it?” you raise your eyebrows at him, there was absolutely no way that he didn’t know that he was your first crush and that he hated being liked by you.
“i don’t know what you’re talking about.” and you force yourself to smile because if you didn’t, you might just throw the mug in your hands, onto his face.
“you look weird,” he frowns at you and you purse your lips, trying to keep your calm, “i really have no idea why you think i hate you, then or now.”
and you were done.
“during play practice! you smiled at everyone, talked to everyone, played along with everyone, talked to them even after the play finished but never to me! are you happy now that i’ve said it?” you push the mug away from you on the counter and fold your arms across your chest, looking away to some corner in the kitchen.
if there was a feeling more dreadful than shame, you were feeling it right now.
how embarrassing that you still remember every single detail about him, how your adolescent mind never really let him go, how your crush on him was so clear, so true that it never left you.
“y/n,” he calls out and your heart is in your throat.
his voice, even as a kid, was so soft, he always spoke so well, he always spoke as if the opposite person was the most interesting person in the world but somehow, that tone never came when he talked to you.
“can you look at me?”
“no.”
“no?” he laughs out, palms coming up to cover his smiling face and for a moment, you’re starstruck again, you can only stare at his smile that held the world’s love and warmth, from your periphery though.
“okay, don’t look at me but i never hated you-“ and just as you’re leaning into listen to jimin, loud stomps break the moment and you’re both turning to see who’s coming.
it’s sunoo.
and he’s crying.
“baby, what happened?” you get up from your seat to sit on your knees in front of sunoo, “home!” is all he says and you frown, “that’s no way to talk in a home that has invited us, sunoo,” you weren’t as strict as his mom but kids needed to be disciplined from time to time.
“it’s okay,” jimin sits beside you, “what happened, big guy?” he coos at sunoo who instantly falls into jimin’s arms and you’re left baffled, this wasn’t like sunoo at all, he never touched anyone until he liked them.
this was dangerous.
“arin’s not giving me her toys, i want to play too,” sunoo says between hiccups and whines and you straighten beside jimin, “those are arin’s toys sunoo, you should ask someone before you use their stuff, you know this,” and he falls silent.
“but arin should also share, right? she should know that too,” jimin rubs his palms on sunoo’s back who nods furiously, “i asked!”
“okay, let’s call arin and we can sort this out?” jimin suggests but sunoo shakes his head, “home,” he says again but with exhaustion instead of anger.
oh, the trials and tribulations of a 5-year-old.
and you know that once he’s tired, he won’t listen to a word, “i think we’ll head home, he’s tired so,” you scoop sunoo up in your arms and he immediately curls into your shoulder.
“i’m sorry,” jimin sighs and you let out a laugh, “they’re 5-year-olds’s jimin, it’s no one’s fault, and we’ll arrange something for them at mine or my sister’s, okay?” you don’t know why you’re trying to console him but it came automatically.
at the door, jimin casually wraps your coat around you, being careful to not disturb sunoo who was already dozing off, and you walk to your car with your hands and heart full.
“let’s talk sometime, yeah?” jimin says from next to you and you narrow your eyes, “why?”
“god,” he throws his head back with a delighted look on his face, “i just want to talk, jeez,” and you nod reluctantly.
“here,” he opens the door for you to put sunoo in carefully, you could’ve done it yourself but you didn’t mind the help.
“thanks…for today, it was nice of you,” you look at jimin and he nods with a teasing smile, “i can be very nice,” and you roll your eyes, closing the door and effectively creating a barrier between you two.
and you can finally breathe.
while you pull away, you feel your heart thud and thud and thud again.
seeing him with sunoo and spending so much time alone with him did a number on you, you’ll have to write down why you hate him to make sure that no lingering feelings surface but as you leave, he smiles at you through your side view mirror and you’re not sure you ever stood a chance.
-
it only took you a few seconds to understand what you felt, that it was against everything you had believed until then.
it was the first time you were so close to a guy, his hands were a little above your waist, your hands were on his shoulders, and his face was (so) close to yours.
you were practicing for the ballroom scene and when you looked at his eyelashes brushing against his cheeks, you felt your stomach drop with the realization that you liked him, this guy that seemed so ordinary some minutes ago, became something magical, something beyond you and your heart.
“come closer, you two,” your drama teacher shouted over the music and you mindlessly shuffled forward and jimin moved with you, hands tightening on you by instinct and your breath hitched.
you danced weakly, still reeling with the consciousness of liking him and he looked like he did any other day.
later that day, everyone left the practice room except you and jimin, you waited for him to look at you at least once, say anything, you would’ve hung onto any word but he scurried out of the room just as you opened your mouth to tell him what you felt.
“jimin, can we talk? i think i lik-” and he was out of the door.
as if he could sense what was coming next and wanted to avoid it.
and since then, you never brought back the courage to tell him anything.
you had to make peace with that, your buried feelings in your heart had to stay buried.
and you coped with that until the day of the actual play, until he looked like he wanted to say something too, right when the ballroom scene started.
but then, he didn’t turn back on the stage, and you were left warm from his touch, cold from his absence, hurt from his steps away from you, and hopeful from how he looked at you in the eye while you danced.
-
“are you sure that it’s the same guy?” your sister’s voice came from your phone’s speaker and you sighed, “unfortunately, yes, he is,” and she laughed an evil laugh that told you how much she loved this situation.
“this is golden, you used to be so obsessed with him,” she gasped, you were sure her mind was playing the whole reel of you gushing about jimin, “that was a long time ago, give it up.” you groaned and scrolled mindlessly through your instagram.
jimin had sent you a follow request after you left his house a couple of days ago, you almost fell from the bed when you saw it pop up on your screen but what was more embarrassing was the speed with which you accepted the request and sent one back.
“oh my god, i just remembered how you would go for that weekly school exercise thing just to see him! you used to bend forward, backward, to see him a few lines away, this is amazing, this is amazing!” she sang from your phone and you winced at that memory.
it was true, you only went to the weekly drill to see jimin, a quick glance of his face used to make you unexplainably happy.
but with your fingers scrolling through his posts now, you guessed that some things just don’t change.
jimin would probably be doing the same thing, no one sends an instagram request without the intent to stalk that person’s profile, right?
but maybe he has a life and you don’t.
sigh.
“can you send me a picture of what he looks like right now? also, what is sunoo doing?” she asks and you frown, “sunoo is sleeping and why do you need his picture?”
“i just want to see,” and she starts rambling about how she deserves it as your sister, you tune it out, getting up to answer the door when the bell rings.
“it’s just so crazy to me that he’s back in your life, like imagine meeting your first crush in your nephew’s school? i bet it’s only yo-“ but you’re not listening to her at all anymore because at the other side of the door, are jimin with arin, who have both now heard your embarrassing older sister.
“anyway, send me a picture after you’re finished stalki-“ and you cut the call.
“hello.” you clear your throat, and he waves his hand while arin beams at you.
“oh wait, please come in,” you open your door wider, watching with wide eyes as they both step in and take in your home, you are suddenly too conscious about your pajamas and hair.
you weren’t expecting visitors.
what is he even doing here?
just as you’re about to ask jimin, he turns to you with a guilty look which consists of sad, puppy eyes and a slight pout.
arin truly gets it from her uncle.
how is that look not turning you off?
you know for a fact that the same exact look on another man would have just pissed you off.
“sorry to come so suddenly, you mentioned where you lived in one of our messages and arin was killing me all morning about wanting to see sunoo, and i tried to calm her down, i really did but you know how it gets,” jimin rambles on and on, and you nod along, only half distracted by his long coat and ruffled hair.
he must have come in a rush too.
and yes, you were texting each other and no, it’s very casual and friendly talk only.
“i thought they were fighting?” you ask and signal jimin to follow you into the kitchen where you put on a pot of water to boil.
how did he look like he belonged in your space when he was in it for all of two minutes?
“i thought so too,” jimin laughs and you smile at the sound of his laughter, you loved it then, and you love it now, someone should shoot you to snap you out of whatever magic spell jimin has cast on you.
“arin baby, what do you like?” you turn to her and she shakes her head, “you’re not going to ask me?” jimin raises his arms up in question and you hum, “you take what i give you, park jimin,” and he’s laughing again.
wow, you must be some extraordinary comedian.
“sunoo is sleeping right now but i’m sure he would love to see you guys, i’ll just be right back with him,” you place a cup of green tea in front of jimin and start heading out of the room.
“honey?” you hear as you’re leaving, “nope, cinnamon,” you reply, ignoring the shiver up your spine from how he called out honey.
after a lot of struggle with sunoo’s blanket and begging him, he was finally out of the room and standing in front of arin with his arms crossed, you and jimin watched with interest as they stared at each other.
“what do you think they will do?”
“fight?” you offer and jimin rolls his eyes at you, “they’re kids,” and you shrug, “kids are very good at fighting.”
and your eyes snap back to them when arin hugs sunoo over his crossed arms, you and jimin look at each other with your hearts melting as sunoo tries to resist but soon, gives up and wraps his arms around her.
“they’re so cute,” he whispers, and you nod with your hand over your heart.
sunoo and arin then take off to the living room where his toys are laid out and they’re lost in their own world within the next five minutes.
you and jimin sit in the kitchen, sipping your tea and looking at each other, only to return to sipping your tea, words lost in your tongues and throats.
“was that your sister on the phone?” and you ignore it, staring at the cup of tea with much focus and interest, “hey, she was, wasn’t she?” his voice gets more teasing, more light, more carefree and you hate that it makes you smile, you hate that your cheeks still flush in his presence.
“i won’t tell anyone or will i?” he winks at you when you finally look up and you groan, slamming your face into the table and he giggles next to you, uncontrollably.
“i’m going to kill myself,” you mumble into the table and he brings his hand forward to push your face away from the table and…towards him, his face and you almost fall off a chair once again because of him.
“don’t worry, i stalked you too.”
-
it was scary, how quickly you could come to terms with the fact that you liked jimin again, how quickly your heart accepted him even if ages passed and even if you’ve both changed.
“why do you even like him?” this was a question that your friends had asked you then, a question that your sister asked you then, and a question you often asked yourself.
it was simple to you.
jimin was different.
softer than other men but stronger too.
more delicate but also more protective.
he could make you blush and burst into laughter, in all of two seconds.
he was always like that, even when kids back then were trying to be cool and tough, jimin carried a bright, easy smile with care for the people around him. even if it didn’t always extend to you, it was still there.
but you think that might have changed.
“and you’re sure you are free to pick sunoo up?” your sister asks and you nod happily, “absolutely, don’t worry, i got him,” and she thanks you before cutting the call.
and now, you’re standing in front of his school in a better outfit than you normally would wear, you’re giddy with sweaty palms and flushed cheeks, but you don’t hate this.
“looks like someone’s all dressed up,” you don’t stop yourself from grinning at jimin’s voice from a few feet away.
fine, maybe you’ve been picking sunoo up a lot more these days but that’s just you being the best aunt in the world.
“unlike you, people like putting an effort into their outfits and personal style,” but you’re lying straight out of your teeth, jimin had a very good sense of style but he didn’t need to know that and besides, when he laughs and bumps your shoulder with his, your heart lights up.
so, this is what park jimin is to everyone else.
this is what everyone else felt when they were next to him.
how did all of them not fall in love with him?
you couldn’t have been the only one.
you don’t think you’ve ever felt this sure of something in your life.
you like chocolates, but not in milkshakes or when they are dark.
you like reading books, but sometimes you get into a slump.
you like romantic comedies, but sometimes, you find them cringeworthy and unrealistic.
you like jimin.
but….nothing, you just liked him.
“should we go get ice cream after this?” you turn to see him and he raises his eyebrows so, you quickly backtrack, “sunoo keeps asking for it and arin would like it too,” and he nods at it, you nod fiercely with him.
what your nephew wants, he gets, of course.
“i didn’t ask for ice cream,” is the first thing that flies out of sunoo’s mouth when you tell him about it, you are frozen with your knees bent as jimin stifles a burst of laughter behind his palms and you know if you turn around, you might as well bury yourself six feet under.
“sunoo,” you warn-whisper and he just tilts his head at you, you drop your head, there is no point in blaming your nephew for this, you’ve done this to yourself.
you grab sunoo’s hand and speed-walk to your car without looking back, with red cheeks and shaky palms.
the universe seems to be hell-bent on making sure that you embarrass yourself in front of park jimin for the rest of your life.
“hey hey, where are you going?” jimin pulls you back with his hand around your elbow and you purse your lips, “did you not hear my nephew out me?”
he throws his head back in laughter, “i did but don’t be silly, let’s go,” and you frown, “go where?”
“for ice cream,” and you’re lost again, he’s tutting at you, “if you want ice cream, we’re getting ice cream,” and looks down at you with a grin that has you holding your smile back, “okay.”
at the ice cream store, jimin hovers around you, asks you your favorites, asks you if you like desserts, asks if you like movies or tv shows, and you answer each question with increasing fondness towards him.
god, you must love attention.
“you were so intimidating in school,” and your jaw dropped, “no, i wasn’t! if anything, you were intimidating,” and jimin shook his head, “no way, how was i intimidating? i talked to everyone.”
you wipe ice cream from the corners of sunoo’s mouth as you speak, “that was intimidating to me because i didn’t talk to too many people,” and jimin nods, “and for me, you were intimidating, i could talk to literally anyone and everyone but you.”
“but why?”
“why?” he looks up in question and you pause for a second, not knowing if you should continue the sentence, “but why was i intimidating? why couldn’t you talk to me?”
because i would’ve given everything to talk to you, stays deep in your throat.
jimin sits back in his seat, pondering for a few seconds and you almost take it back, you almost tell him to forget it but then he opens his mouth, “you were intimidating because you were always good at what you did,” and your eyes widen by their own accord, you had never heard that from anyone except your drama teacher.
“i don’t know if you remember but i was so lost in the beginning, i didn’t know anything about acting but you set this example that i could follow and it was easier for me, you were constantly checking on me too,” he laughs amusedly, as if that time was playing behind his eyes and you crack a smile too, though your heart just got warmer and warmer until it felt like it was catching on fire.
“you were good at it too, jimin, especially the dance,” he was taken for his dance skills first and he was bloody good at it, “i know, i was amazing,” and you’re throwing a tissue paper at him.
“but i wanted to talk to you,” he nods as he speaks and you can’t help it, “because you knew that i liked you?”
he stops himself from grinning, “that was the biggest shock of my teenage life, y/n,” and you roll your eyes, “i know, it’s hard for me to believe too,” he groans and slides into his seat, making you giggle.
“did you…really like me?” his voice is soft, unguarded, and he throws one arm over his eyes, you notice his cheeks are red too and you shift in your seat, the mood was shifting, you didn’t want to giggle and deny it like you probably would have if he asked that even some ten seconds ago.
“i did,” and he removes his arm, and stares at you unsuredly, as if he doesn’t believe you and you clench your hands on your lap to hold back from saying anything else.
“home!” a chorus from the kids you’ve forgotten about brings you back to life, a life where it wasn’t just you and jimin in it.
jimin smiles, “how about a refill?” and as they cheer out loud, he looks at you, and you know that look.
he had something to say.
-
you both got scolded by your respective siblings for giving their kids extra ice creams but it also meant that the kids loved you more, you and jimin had giggled about it on text.
it was a win-win for you.
but what was even more of a win-win was that jimin purposefully got them extra ice cream to spend more time with you, you are about 90% sure that’s the reason.
you spent about half the day in that ice cream parlour, and jimin asked you questions that no one else ever has and you asked him all those things you never got to when you were in school.
it was terrifying, to talk to him like that, to give him parts of what made you, you, and it was especially terrifying when you gave all of it away so easily.
“so, you’re coming to pick him up, right? like this isn’t an extra task for you?” jimin’s voice through a phone was different, lower, more serious, you loved it.
“definitely, don’t even worry about it, i’ll pick her up and bring her over,” you didn’t know what it said that he trusted you with his niece but it had to be something good, it made you feel fantastic.
“thank you so much, seriously, i owe you one,” and you can sense the relief in his tone, “you do owe me one, yes,” he laughs at your tone, “you get here, i’ll make it up to you very well.”
on the whole way there, you are so giddy that you can’t stop smiling.
you never understood why people got so excited over phone calls but if it was up to you, you would’ve never even cut the call with jimin.
when you get to the school, sunoo and arin are holding each other’s hands and standing obediently next to margaret.
“hi kids, today auntie is going to take you both home, are we excited?” sunoo and arin raise their hands up in joy and you resist the urge to pick them both up and give them one nice hug.
“her uncle called and said you would be picking her up,” margaret smiles at you knowingly and you roll your eyes, “it’s nothing like that margaret, we’re good friends,” and she scoffs at you but it only makes you giddier.
it felt good that someone, besides you, liked the idea of you two together.
you: picked them up, on my way over!
jimin: thanks again, see you soon <3
you almost throw your phone out of the window in happiness but for the sake of the kids, for them to think you’re not some insane person, you just grin and put your phone aside.
“okay arin, let’s go to your uncle’s place,” after checking them, you fasten your seatbelt and they both cheer again.
oh, you love these kids.
as you pull away, they instantly start rambling about their day, which picture they were made to draw, which teacher annoyed them, which toy was stolen, which color pencil they lost and you nod intently, offering dramatic reactions wherever you could.
“and then mummy told me that i had to throw away some toys but can you talk to mummy? i like my toys,” sunoo whines to you and you sigh, “you got it buddy, i’ll deal with your mother.”
“so arin, what have you been upto? anything exciting?” and she lights up, “i drew a castle today, do you want to see?”
“of course baby, as soon as we’re home, i absolutely have to see it,” your agreement only makes her happier, “our new home is nice, i like it, mummy and daddy made my room pink, and i even have a close friend!”
“is that so? who’s this lucky person?”
“it’s miss ana, uncle jimi’s girlfriend! she’s always over at uncle’s home and she likes me, i like her too.” and she goes back to swinging her legs and poking at sunoo until he laughs.
in the front seat, you are frozen and confused.
“your uncle has a girlfriend?” you try to sound casual and you hate that you’re asking a kid about this but you couldn’t help it.
“yeah.” she shrugs and goes back to sunoo.
you felt your stomach turn.
of course, he has a girlfriend.
of course, you had read it all wrong.
of course, you are the idiot again.
you kept your eyes steady on the road as the feeling of nothingness settled into you.
you would get over this, you got over jimin once, you could do it again and next time, you wouldn’t make the stupid mistake of thinking that anyone could ever like you for anything more than what you present them. you’ve gotten over first boyfriends, situationships, and dates which felt like they would lead somewhere and you would get over this too.
it was weird that you could still feel the same embarrassment of liking jimin, the same pathetic feeling you get when you overestimate yourself and what people feel about you, rises and falls in your chest.
but it was okay.
you’ll get over this.
-
“oh jimin! jimin!” you turned your face away from classmates who yelled his name.
somehow, the cat was out of the bag and everyone knew about your crush on him, your bets were on one of your play’s cast members but you couldn’t point a finger at anyone. your school was small and boring enough for this kind of stuff to spread quickly.
it was true, you did like him, a lot but you never wanted anyone to know, you only wanted him to know.
you were hoping to catch him alone, tell him that you liked him, and accept whichever response he gave you, he didn’t have to like you back but now, he knew, you knew that he knew, it was just not in the way you ever wanted him to know.
and then one day it happened.
the quiet rejection.
the annoyance of being liked by someone you don’t like back.
“look, look! they’re together” you were in the hallway, talking to your friends and jimin was just a few feet away, your friends were subtly pushing you toward him while you pushed back and his friends were pushing him.
that itself was embarrassing enough.
then, your back hit his back and you froze, skin tingling already but he immediately pushed away, and you heard him yell at his friends.
“how many times have i told you guys not to bring her up? how many?” jimin was a gentle guy, that was the first time he had yelled at someone and it was because of you.
and since then, whenever you were in the same room, he would look away with an irritated sigh, he would leave the room or he would glare at his friends until they shut up.
you took it all in, you really did, you just reasoned to yourself that you too, would be very annoyed if your friends acted like that.
but one day, you were alone in your art classroom, arranging some portraits and he walked in, your eyes met his and you were both too aware of how empty your surroundings were, for the first time in a really long time.
he immediately stepped back, his footsteps landed heavily as he walked away.
no one was there.
no one to make fun of him, no one to see or hear.
but he still pretended that you didn’t exist.
your feelings were more tender then.
your heart was a bit too soft and you had taken that as his reply, his response, his rejection and you buried your crush.
your chest was tight the entire day, you couldn’t speak without choking up because as much as you accepted his rejection, it didn’t make it hurt any less.
he never uttered a word to you since then.
you vowed to yourself never to like anyone too much again.
-
“how was school, guys? i missed you,” jimin hugged arin and sunoo as soon as they entered his home and you stood near the door frame with your heart in your throat.
today wouldn’t have been so hard if you didn’t have to see him.
they leave his arms and run into the house, their bags and socks left behind and you quickly collect sunoo’s stuff to put them aside.
“hey,” he appears beside you and you nod, keeping your eyes away from his face.
“i missed you too,” and you wish that you didn’t give in to seeing his face because as soon as you turn to face him, you are in front of his warm eyes and smile, the ones you were so jealous others could see.
but whatever feeling tried to creep on you, you shoved it away.
you nod again, swallowing and the warm scene fades and it’s replaced with a stiff awkwardness that both of you feel in a flash.
you see it go away, the warmth, the smile, the eyes, all of it drops and you hate that you feel terrible even if you didn’t do anything.
“arin made a castle drawing, it’s in her bag,” you say and jimin frowns before shaking his head, “of course, i’ll see it later.”
and your head bobs once again, the only response you could produce at the moment and when jimin steps forward, you step back.
“hey, is everything okay?” he asks, fingers reaching to scratch the nape of his neck confusedly, “yeah, everything’s fine.”
this time, he’s the one nodding and pushing his hands into his pockets, “i’ll make you tea, come on,” you have no choice but to follow him in, though you stay at least five steps behind him.
any touch from him would break your resolve, you couldn’t afford that, not anymore.
“honey or cinnamon?”
“honey.”
“alright,” jimin frowns once again, turning away to boil some water.
and you sit there, wondering if this is all you could ever be with him, wondering if both of you were always destined to be close and far, you feel scalded by the fact that he had never mentioned a girlfriend, you hadn’t asked but he shouldn’t have been texting you the way he was.
“you know, i owe you one,” he turns with a mug of steaming green tea and you stiffen in your seat when he hands it to you with a small, unsure smile, “would you accept dinner as me making it up to you?”
twenty minutes ago, you would’ve jumped up, spilling hot tea everywhere, and closed around him, your arms and heart giving even more way for him, but that was twenty minutes ago, now your arms and heart were closing in on themselves.
him rejecting you in school, you could handle.
him hating your presence, you could handle.
but this, you could only handle for about five minutes before you crumbled.
you should’ve never let your young feelings grow and stay.
“don’t worry about it, you don’t have to do anything, it was just one pickup,” you shrug, playing with the handle of your mug and you see jimin visibly deflate.
“okay, i don’t know what’s going on, is everything okay? did i do something?” the pleading in his tone was there, the sincerity in his face was there but you couldn’t believe any of it.
“nothing happened, jimin, it’s just that you don’t have to make up for anything,” you couldn’t bring yourself to confront his betrayal, to ask him about his girlfriend, you know that any answer would just hurt you more.
“fine, i don’t want to make up for anything, i want to take you out on a date, a proper date without anyone else around, because,” and he pauses, you release the breath caught in your chest, grateful and disappointed that he didn’t finish his sentence.
“i don’t think that’s a good idea,” you give a weak smile, feeling your bones tighten in your body, you would snap like a bowstring if this continued.
jimin looks away, chest rising and falling slowly, he squeezes his eyes shut and you see his hands shake as he whispers, “why?”
“sunoo is sleep!” arin’s yell makes you get up immediately, the distraction was welcome and needed, “also, see this!” she shoves her drawing into your hands and you smile at the messy green castle.
“it’s beautiful, arin, just like you,” you tap her nose and she giggles, you are all too aware of jimin’s stare on your back so, you pat her head and rush to take sunoo out of her bed and into your arms.
you held your nephew tighter to you, his sleeping form was the only thing keeping you stable, you never realized before how much you needed him the way he needed you but today, you needed him most even if he was just sleeping in your arms.
you don’t say bye to jimin on your way out, you only hug arin, ask her to take care, and leave his home with your mind so heavy that you feel like you could tip and fall over.
but as you pull away, you catch jimin in your side mirrors, he stands as if he’s lost everything, you almost turn back, break down in his arms, and ask him why he was so cruel to you, but you drive away instead.
-
“and you’re sure that he won’t be there?” you ask megan for the third time over the phone and she sighs, “listen, it’s his friend, i can’t tell him not to invite his friend but i did tell him that something happened, the rest is truly up to him,” and you bite your lip in annoyance.
it’s been two weeks, you’ve successfully avoided jimin at sunoo’s school, you’ve ignored his calls and deleted his texts without reading them, and you were only one more week away from mentally cutting him off completely.
but again, the universe hated you and noah’s birthday came up right as you were starting to forget that a person named jimin existed.
“you’re right, i’m sorry for being difficult and i’ll be there, noah is sort of my friend too,” you give in, you couldn’t be a bitch to your friends just because you were going through something, and megan hums, “but just know that i won’t judge you at all for not showing up, it’s totally your call.”
you thank her and close your eyes as the call goes dead on the other end.
what a fucking mess.
-
“happy birthday to you!” you sing with everyone else as noah shyly stands in the center with the birthday candles lighting up his face.
it was nice to see your friends again, you melted into every hug they gave you as you walked into noah’s home, you almost teared up at how much you needed them, you were annoyed with all of them just weeks ago but now, you saw clearly that you needed people who cared about you in your life.
“how are you feeling now?” faye put her head on your shoulder as you sat on the couch and you hum, “i’ve been better babe but i’ll be fine soon, i promise,” you squeeze her hand and she purses her lips, “i don’t think he will come, you know, it’s already been a while since the party started, everyone will leave in an hour or so,” and you know that she’s trying to make you feel better.
“thank you for saying that but even if he does come, it’s okay, it’s not like i’ll see him after this,” you shrug and she nods unsurely, “but it’s also okay if you feel shitty that he’s here, you know? you don’t have to pretend that you’re fine with all of it, it’s not a great situation, he lied to you and you’re hurt, you’re allowed to be hurt.”
you blink back tears as you try to rush some air into your lungs that tighten with each word from her.
“i love you, faye.” you whisper, “i love you more,” she smiles and pats you on the back before getting up, “now i’m going to get us some drinks so you stay there in that emotional mood,” you laugh at her and shoo her away.
maybe you weren’t fine now, you won’t need to be for a while but you’ll be okay at some point.
you sigh, you don’t want to be here anymore and pretty much everyone’s given you the green light to leave, you can always have drinks with faye another time so, you get up, surer than ever that you don’t want to be okay anymore, you kiss your friend’s goodbye, you thank noah for inviting you and you step out to the cold night.
right near your car, just as you feel relieved and light, you hear it.
“y/n?” and then quick footsteps.
a presence behind you.
his voice in your ears and bones.
and you freeze.
you hold the key to your car and your legs feel so heavy, they might as well be dead, and you blink, you do nothing but blink until he’s in front of you.
you almost cry at the sight of his face.
“you’re leaving?” jimin huffs out, his breath leaving white clouds in the night and you just stare.
how could someone so beautiful lie to you?
you only come back to earth when you feel him scanning your face and body, as if he was re-remembering what you looked like, as if he was savoring you in front of him but you knew it was all deceitful.
and you lose it.
“don’t you feel ashamed?” you breathe out, feeling every nerve in you tighten impossibly, your body was once again a bowstring being pulled, in front of him.
tight and so breakable.
jimin’s entire face falls, “about what, y/n? why haven’t you been answering my texts and calls? why are you suddenly ignoring me? what is going on? i tried to come up with so many reasons but none of them made sense, i thought we were heading towards something good?” and his face looks so pained, so sad that you almost break.
almost.
“i should’ve never fucking liked you in school, i should’ve never given you that ego boost, i should’ve seen you for who you are,” you angrily spit out as you fumble with your keys and open your car.
without looking at him even once, you climb in, leaning back once you are in.
but immediately, as you begin to start the engine, another door opens and jimin is in your car.
jimin is in your car.
“what the fuck are you doing? get out!” you yell at him, and he shakes his head, “i’m not going anywhere until you explain to me what is going on.”
“i don’t have to explain shit to you, get out jimin, or i swear to god,” you huff out, feeling your hands shake from the rage you felt, he doesn’t move an inch, “or what?”
“seriously?”
“yeah, if i don’t get out, what will you do?”
“i’ll fucking crash this car.” you level your glare on him and he sits back, “do it.”
“what?”
“do it, crash it, i’ll pay for the repairs, but i’m not getting out until you tell me why you hate me right now.” the calmness he had at that moment, the level in his tone never wavering, pissed you off even more.
“fine, we can sit here all night,” you shrug, desperate to match his cool, you switch off the engine, “fine by me,” jimin shrugs back and you clench your teeth to not groan at him.
minutes pass, you tap your foot against the floor of the car, he looks out the window, and both of you sit stubbornly without making a move.
you should be furious.
you should be still trying to kick him out.
but you slowly start to deflate, your anger fades bit by bit as the feeling of missing him, liking him even now, begins blooming in you again.
“who is ana?” you whisper, not trying to hide how sad just mentioning her name made you.
whatever his answer was, you would move on.
you never liked him for him to like you back, not then and not now, but it felt good to believe that somewhere, he felt the same desperate, pathetic love that you did, that somewhere, he was different with you the way you were different with him, that he too lost his cool and common sense when it came to you.
“what?” he frowns and you sigh, “please don’t lie to me jimin, just tell me who she is and why you never told me that she was your girlfriend.” you choke back the sobs building in your throat, and jimin immediately leans towards you, “hey, hey, what girlfriend are you talking about? i don’t have a girlfriend.”
you laugh bitterly through your tears, “so, you’re calling your baby niece a liar?”
“arin? what did she say?” he continues to frown, seemingly growing more confused by every passing second, which only makes you more confused, “that ana is your girlfriend? she’s always at your place?”
“ana? oh!” and jimin throws his head back on the seat, eyes closing in what you thought was relief, “ana is her new babysitter, y/n,” you huff out in annoyance, “believe it or not jimin but i’m not as stupid as you think i am, how fucking convenient is it that a woman your niece calls your girlfriend, turns out to be her sitter.”
and he gapes at you before throwing his arms up, “i’m sorry that the truth is convenient and fits with the situation!” he yells back at you and you glare at him, “oh really? then why is she over when you’re there with arin already? why does arin think she’s your girlfriend? do you have an explanation for any of that?”
“i do, but only if you’re willing to at least hear me out,” and jimin is back to calm, back to zen, and you want to push him out of the car, “see, i know it sounds bad if she just mentioned the girlfriend part but i’ve told you, arin is shy, she never talks to anyone, she doesn’t like sitters, she takes a lot of time to get used to strangers so i’m a buffer until she gets used to ana so, that ana can just babysit her at my brother’s place instead of mine.”
you narrow your eyes at him as you process his words. unfortunately, it made a lot of sense, sunoo was the same, that is why you always babysat him.
“okay, then why call her your girlfriend?”
“because she thinks friends if they’re girls are girlfriends,” he sighs out and you purse your lips, that also made sense, especially with kids as young as sunoo and arin.
“i see.” you whisper back, not knowing how to feel about all this, it made sense, you should be over the moon, falling into his arms, telling him that you feel everything again, that you like him again but you freeze instead.
you were so ready to move on.
you were so ready to never see him again.
and you were so ready to never know his response, to never know what he felt.
but you are here, in front of him, as he waited for you to speak with anxious eyes and you only felt overwhelmed.
“okay.”
“okay?”
“thanks for explaining, if you get off, i will go now,” you keep your eyes on the road ahead of you, refusing to look at him even through your periphery.
“seriously? do you need time or is something else wrong?” you hear the pleading in his tone, the desperation, you wonder if you ever sounded like that to him.
“nothing’s wrong, i’m glad you explained, and now, i’d like to go home,” this always happened, whenever your emotions got too much, whenever it seemed like everything would fall on your head and crush you, you slipped into robot mode, where you refused to feel anything, where you refused to be human, where your feelings were nothing but dust in the air.
it’s how you never went back to a boyfriend, how you never begged anyone for anything and it kept you protected.
“why are you doing this?” but god, the crack in his voice might just break your resolve.
“doing what, jimin? i just want to go home,” you try to reason and he huffs in annoyance, “that’s not what this is, you aren’t even looking at me.”
and you pause.
take a deep breath.
look at him.
and the warmth you missed for all your teenage life, lights you up, beyond his frown, his gathering tears, his clear sadness, his warmth peeked through and stared straight at you.
you knew you had to go, leave before you couldn’t but where will you go?
how many times will you turn your back on yourself?
how many chances do you have left with jimin?
and will he ever take those chances the way you will?
“you’ll never like me, jimin,” you start, unwilling but forcing yourself to pull through, he opens his mouth to protest and you cut him off, “you’ll never like me as much as i like you.”
and his mouth falls shut.
“and i’ll always know that, i’ll always know that you like me less than i like you, that you hated me at a time when i would’ve done anything for you, and by some miracle, it’s changed now, you might like me but never as much as i like you, my past of loving you as a kid, will always haunt me, and your rejection then will always hurt me,” you have tears dripping down your chin by the time you’ve finished and you know it will only pain you more if you look at him so, you stare at your lap.
you wait for him to get off, to go away, to finally understand why you two would never work out.
“so, please let’s leave this be, i’ll continue to bring sunoo around for arin, we can be civil for them but whatever this is, i can’t do it, not with you,” you whisper, hoping that it was loud enough for him to hear but he stays eerily still, staring into nothing and you wonder if he didn’t hear you.
“jimin, can you-“
“what about me?”
“now you’re just being childish,” your anger rises again.
“no, i never got the chance to explain my side at all, what if i like you more? what if i liked you way before you did?” your heart stops in your throat at his words but you shake it off, “this isn’t a competition, jimin!”
“fine, then this should just be a casual question, when did you start liking me? in school, when did it start?”
“seriously? what are you trying to prove here?” you turn to fully face him with a scowl.
“just tell me.” he sits just as rigid, just as fed up, and it only irritates you even more but your face goes red nonetheless at the memory, “ball room scene, dance practice.”
“i liked you when you gave me the script,” and you want to look away, ignore all of what he says but you only lean in further and he leans in too as if letting you in on a secret that no one else knows,  “i remember exactly how stomach-bottoming it felt, how scared i was because i thought you would never like me back.”
“really?” you’re leaning in even closer, so much more desperate to every other secret of his.
“really, and i’m not saying this because it’s a competition, i’m saying this because i couldn’t then, i didn’t have the courage, i liked you so much that the thought of you rejecting me, it would’ve killed me,” he laughs, both amused and horrified at the truth spilling out from his lips, but you see the fear too, the restrain in his breath, and it makes your own shoulders fall.
“then why did you act so annoyed whenever someone teased you?” you whisper again, embarrassed to ask the question because it made you feel like a kid again, the same kid who hid her feelings to make sure that he wasn’t inconvenienced by your heart.
he drops his head in quiet laughter, “imagine you like this person so much that your whole body fails you, and there’s some idiots making it even harder for me to look you in the eye,” he looks up at you as he says it and your spine weakens to fall on the seat behind you, every word of his puncturing itself into your heart.
jimin copied your movements and fell back too, sighing out, “i also knew how annoying it could be for you so i thought if i acted like that for a while, they would forget but fuck, they were persistent. honestly, i thought you would figure it out because of them.”
“figure out what?” you are breathless by the time the question escapes you.
“your crush was never one-sided, y/n, but mine was, at least for a little while.” you blush, not knowing what to do with your face anymore, you didn’t know if you were smiling or frozen or frowning but the numbness, the blind excitement left you gasping.
and jimin purses his lips, “i might’ve been this bright kid who talked to everyone then, but none of that helped me when it came to you, it was like every bit of confidence i had fell from me when i was around you and it was alarming, you know, it was so fucking scary to feel so different because of one person.”
and there it was.
the confirmation.
that he was different with you, that he too lost his head with you.
“what about later? when we met again?”
“oh that, i was trying to be cool, it didn’t work, right?” he winced and you couldn’t help the laugh bubbling out of you, “nope, not at all.” and jimin bangs his head against the headrest and you sit there, smiling.
it was strange, the elation and frustration you felt, it was strange to sit next to jimin and hear the words from him that you’ve waited for forever.
but you won’t hold that over him anymore and you were done burying your heart.
“i like you,” you say, twisting to face him and he smiles, not bothering to hide it, “a lot, jimin, i liked you then, i like you now, a lot and i’m scared.”
he leans forward to take one of your hands into his palms, you melt your fingers into his skin, and he speaks with a smile and with the world’s confidence and fear, “i like you, i’m sure that like is love too, it’s always been there and i’m scared too.”
“but i like you and i’ll continue to do that while i’m scared.” and any worry you had, flies out the window.
you feel brave.
you feel like you could fly and never see the ground again.
you stare at him for a minute or two, until his face is in your head like it’s your own face and you cross the barrier, in this case, the handbrake in your car to climb into his lap and you shiver when he buries his face into your neck.
you loved him when you didn’t know what it meant, and jimin loved you before he ever knew his heart could feel so much.
and that was enough for you to smile into his hair and wrap your arms tighter around his neck.
“i’ll do the same, jimin.”
-
jimin felt heavy with the love in his heart, with his arms on your waist, with his fingertips touching your skin, he felt overwhelmed, a bit crazy, and definitely scared out of his mind.
this was it.
the performance.
after today, you probably wouldn’t even look at him again, he’ll probably be just another guy who sees you walk down the hallway.
he knows when this funny feeling in his heart started, you had passed him the script and walked right past him to teach someone else how to do their scenes, and instantly he saw you, he saw nothing but you.
being the loser he was, he messed up any scene he could so that you could walk over, glare at him, and then, help him endlessly, help him until he was perfect (which he already was).
and he was alone in that pathetic-ness, alone in that feeling until one day, you looked at him as if he hung the stars in the sky and he didn’t know what to do with himself since that day.
but he had you in his arms, he had you in front of him, he had you in every moment of being on the stage and he knows he can’t just get off.
“and…cut!” jimin deflates, his arms that were so sure of holding you, weaken and fall from you.
then, the lights die and his confidence dies, and he feels ashamed of himself, so much so that he leaves the stage immediately.
he hears the cheers, the screams, the applause but none of that matters when the words he’s wanted to say die inside of him.
but he stops below the stage, looks up to see you hugging everyone on the stage, and hates himself a little but charges forward.
he would love you from afar.
but he would continue to love you.
189 notes · View notes
chimcess · 2 months ago
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Bittersweet || myg (2)
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Pairing: Yoongi x ReaderOther Tags: Grad Student!Yoongi, Undergrad!Reader, Grad Student!Hoseok, Uncle!Namjoon, Doctor!Namjoon, Grad Student!Jimin, Fuckboy!Jungkook, GradStudent!Jungkook, Boss!Seokjin, Yoongi POV Genre: College!AU, Strangers to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, kinda Student/Teacher but not really, Older!Yoongi, Fluff, Angst, Eventual Smut Word Count: 19.9k+ Summary: When a cynical graduate student meets an overly enthusiastic undergraduate, the air crackles with tension—though not all of it is good. Warnings: Mean!Yoongi, bitter grad student to the max, strong language, Jimin is still a snitch, possible wrong science information (i'm sorry i'm not perfect), sexual tension, Yoongi pining and being in love for almost 20k words, kissing at work, almost caught, graphic s*x scenes, non-descriptive smut as well, Jealous!Yoongi, i'm sorry but this JK is kind of a slime ball, Reader knows what she's doing, they're adorable, lots of bickering, drunk Yoon, drunk texting, they're both the biggest dorks on the planet, reader sleep talks, multiple sex scenes, oral (m&f receiveing), vaginal fingering, vaginal sex, handjobs, all things considered these two are very vanilla, some dirty talk, reader mostly takes charge, public sex, sex at work, shower sex, again they're still dorks even when they're in bed, let me know if I missed anything... A/N: Here's the second (and final) installment of this little two-shot. Thanks for reading!
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I decided not to make a fuss about the stupid recruitment party. It was just a way for them to shove fresh-faced recruits down our throats, anyway. Instead of hitching a ride with Hoseok and Serena, I opted to walk alone, letting the cool night air wash over me. The campus felt both familiar and alien in the twilight, the shadows stretching long and eerie across the cracked pavement. Walking had always been my way of clearing my head, but tonight it felt like a futile exercise.
As soon as I stepped inside the venue, the noise slammed into me—laughter, chatter, and the clinking of glasses mingling into a chaotic symphony of youthful energy. I scanned the room, and when my eyes landed on her, I couldn’t help but groan. Y/N was there, and she was wearing those jeans—God, they looked painted on, hugging her curves in a way that sent my pulse racing. Her legs stretched endlessly, accentuated by those unforgiving black heels that screamed danger. My throat tightened with the realization: she was wearing fuck-me heels.
Fuck me indeed…
I shook my head, forcing myself to look away, as if her mere presence was some twisted magnet pulling me closer. I made my way to the bar at the back, seeking refuge against the wall while I nursed a drink, pretending to be absorbed in the chaos around me. But it didn’t take long before my eyes betrayed me, drawn back to her like a moth to a flame. She was laughing with a group of kids—probably this year’s recruits—her smile radiant and infectious.
Then, like a bad omen, Jungkook sauntered in, drink in hand, striding over to her with that cocky grin of his.
“Yoongi’s here! Let the party begin!” Serena’s voice cut through my thoughts, grating like nails on a chalkboard. I grimaced.
“What took you so long? Had trouble matching that sweater?” Hoseok appeared behind her, donning a tie that screamed ‘pretentious.’
I shot Serena a look, raising an eyebrow, and she responded with a smirk, clearly reveling in my discomfort.
“Yeah… not all of us have the privilege of being dressed by our girlfriends,” I muttered, bitterness creeping into my tone.
“Come on… I kid, I kid,” Hoseok laughed, draping an arm over my shoulder.
“I’ll leave you two to your bromance,” Serena rolled her eyes, tossing her hair back. “I better go suck up to my P.I.”
“How are you?” Hoseok’s tone shifted, sensing the dark cloud hanging over me.
“I’m peachy,” I replied, sarcasm dripping from my voice.
“I see…” He glanced in Y/N’s direction. “Oh… I see.”
“Yeah, well, Jungkook’s trying to get her drunk,” I hissed through clenched teeth, watching as he leaned in closer.
“Right. Jeon’s all over your zygote’s business,” he replied, a knowing smirk on his lips.
I groaned into my beer, bitterness churning in my stomach.
“C’mon! More drinking, less brooding!” He smacked my back playfully, but it only deepened the pit of resentment growing inside me.
An hour later, I was still a wallflower, slouched against my corner, shamelessly staring at Y/N as she flitted around the room. Jungkook kept swooping in like a hawk, but she brushed him off, her laughter echoing like a melody in the air. That was a relief, at least. Yet, reality settled in like a thick fog: she hadn’t even noticed me yet.
Then, our eyes locked. Time seemed to freeze, and I swear I involuntarily smiled. She walked toward me, a small grin dancing on her lips, and I was struck by how her hair flowed over her shoulders, the softness of it almost intoxicating. “Is that a new sweater?” she asked, her voice sweet and melodic.
“Are you making fun of me?” I shot back lightly.
“No…” she chuckled, her eyes sparkling. “You look good.”
“You look good too,” I replied, the words feeling flat against the brilliance of her presence. Well, that was an understatement—she looked stunning.
“You shouldn’t be drinking,” I said, gesturing to the beer in her hand, feeling an unexpected rush of protectiveness.
“Why not?” She brought the bottle to her mouth, her lips wrapping around it like an invitation.
Focus, Min!
“Are you twenty-one yet?” I blurted out, curiosity getting the better of me.
“Are you the party police?”
“Very funny,” I deadpanned, annoyance creeping in as I waited for her answer.
“If you must know, I am twenty-one already, thank you very much.”
“You are?” I was genuinely surprised. She didn’t seem old enough to be a senior, not with that wide-eyed enthusiasm.
“Yep, I missed a year in junior high. No biggie.” She shrugged, casual as ever.
“Oh…” The admission surprised me, stirring questions in my mind. What could have caused someone as smart and driven as her to miss a year?
My distraction drifted away as my gaze returned to her shoulders, delicate freckles dusting her skin, catching the fading light.
“Oh! I haven’t met that one!” Y/N quipped, spotting another recruit. “Be right back.”
I was entranced, eyes glued to her as she walked away, her hips swaying like a pendulum, counting down the moments until she returned. I was royally screwed. Somewhere along the way, I’d transformed from oblivious to hyper-aware, every single action of hers magnified under the microscope of my attention. How could I go back to not seeing her when each new thing I noticed sent heat flooding through me?
Y/N returned, all smiles, clutching another beer bottle that she’d snatched from Jungkook. “Why are you so angry?” she asked, leaning against the wall next to me.
“Y/N, I’m not angry. I’m having fun.” I tried to sound calm, but my voice cracked like thin ice.
“This is you having fun?” she countered, gesturing to my slumped posture with her beer.
“Yes,” I insisted, though my gaze lingered on the constellation of freckles scattered across her nose.
“Standing in the corner, looking at everyone like you’re a bodyguard, or an undercover cop—that’s you having fun?”
“Yes.” I shrugged, clinging to some semblance of composure.
“You’re angry.” She tilted her head, her eyes narrowing in playful challenge.
“I’m not angry!” But deep down, the heat was rising inside me.
She laughed, the sound bubbling up like a mountain spring. “You’re frowning.”
“Because you’re driving me insane!” I inhaled deeply, trying to relax, but she was intoxicating.
“Why?” She stepped closer, her presence an electric charge in the air.
“Because you’re too happy.” And adorable…
“What’s wrong with being happy?” she retorted, her hand perched on her hip, radiating defiance.
My eyes drifted back to her, tracing the curve of her hip accentuated by those devilish pants. I closed my eyes, taking another deep breath to steady myself. “It’s extremely annoying.”
“Well, I’m sorry.” Her smile morphed into a giggle, and I groaned, feeling the weight of my frustration. “Do I really annoy you so much?”
She peered at me, eyebrows knitting together, a small frown blossoming on her face. I resisted the urge to look at her lips, afraid that if I did, I might just pull her in and kiss her right there.
“Yes,” I groaned, hoping my eyes conveyed that my answer was really “no.”
She held my gaze, and it felt like we were suspended in time, the world around us fading into insignificance. My fingers tightened around the neck of my beer bottle, anxiety coiling in my stomach. With a sigh, she shook her head and walked away again, leaving me alone with my turbulent thoughts.
Honestly, Y/N’s unyielding happiness, her enthusiasm, and all that radiance—it wasn’t annoying at all. It was refreshing, endearing, and it inspired me in ways I hadn’t felt in years. I couldn’t help but remember the excitement I once felt about starting this journey, how my heart raced at the thought of diving into research. What had changed? What did success even mean if there was no one to share it with?
So yes, Y/N’s happiness was far from annoying.
What was truly infuriating was that she made it impossible for me to keep my hands to myself.
“Jungkook offered to walk me home,” Y/N said, her voice slicing through the murmur of the crowd like a knife. I kept my gaze fixed on the throng, avoiding her bright eyes, filled with something I couldn’t quite decipher. “But I don’t know if that’s such a good idea.”
When I finally turned to look at her, a smile tugged at her lips, a spark of mischief lighting her features. “I think you might be right about him—he is kind of a tool.”
A snort escaped me, the tension in my chest easing just a fraction. “Plus I don’t trust him.”
“I don’t trust him either, Y/N,” I admitted, feeling the weight of my own words. It was the only reason I was here, shadowing her like a ghost.
“Can I lie and tell him you’re walking me home instead?”
Her gaze catches mine, and I’m momentarily swept away in the depths of her beautiful eyes, glowing softly under the dim lights, as if they’re hiding secrets just waiting to be uncovered. 
“You don’t have to lie, Y/N. I’ll walk you home myself,” I say, my voice dripping with sincerity I didn’t know I had. She looks down, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear, an unintentional cue for me to look away.
When she finally says she’s ready to leave, we exchange goodbyes, and she pauses at the door, rummaging through her bag. I can’t help but smile when she pulls out a pair of black Chucks. As she grips my arm to slide off her high heels, I catch a flicker of discomfort flash across her face.
“Are you okay?” I ask, concern bubbling up.
“Yeah, my feet are killing me,” she replies, a hint of laughter in her voice.
“I could go get my car.”
“Nonsense. It’s just ten minutes away,” she insists, slipping her shoes back on, and we begin our trek.
As we walk toward her building, she animatedly recounts stories about prospective students, her voice weaving a vibrant tapestry that pulls us closer together. It’s no wonder she’s so well-liked; anyone would be a fool not to adore her. 
“Can you hold these?” she asks, passing me her heels as we reach her building. A twinge of envy strikes me at the sight of those dainty straps that had just hugged her ankles.
She digs through her purse, clearly on a mission. 
“Shit…” Frustration laces her voice. “Shit, shit, shit, shit!”
“What’s wrong?”
“I don’t have my keys… I must have left them inside, in my other bag.”
“Oh…” I glance at the time. It’s past two in the morning. 
Should I offer her a place to stay? That’s what any decent person would do, right? But what if… what if I couldn’t keep my hands to myself?
“I’m so stupid!” she exclaims, smacking her forehead with the heel of her hand.
“Hey, relax… um… I have a bed. I mean, a couch.” 
She looks up at me, skepticism dancing across her features.
“Really, it’s no problem.” I shrug, trying to keep my tone casual, as if it’s just a simple offer rather than an opportunity for something more.
Her expression remains doubtful.
“That’s what graduate student mentors are for, right?”
A small grin appears on her lips, and I can’t help but smile back. If all else fails, maybe I could find a way to make her smile like that—nothing would make me happier.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah… it’s not like it’d be awkward or anything,” I tease, and her laughter lifts the tension in the air.
It takes us about twenty minutes to reach my apartment. Y/N talks a mile a minute, and I barely manage to squeeze a word in, but I don’t mind; her voice wraps around me like a warm blanket on a chilly night.
As we climb the steps of my building, I notice her wince again, gripping the railing for support.
“Y/N, are you okay?” Worry creeps in; she looks genuinely pained.
She takes a deep breath, forcing a smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “I’m fine.”
“Y/N, please, just tell me what’s wrong.” I reach for her hand, desperate to ease whatever discomfort she’s feeling.
“Can we just go inside?” She clutches my hand tighter. “I’ll tell you, I promise.”
I help her inside and guide her to the couch. She collapses onto it with a shaky breath, extending her legs and rubbing her thighs—a gesture that sends a pang of concern through me.
“It’s not a big deal,” she begins, trying to sound lighthearted. “Sometimes I get pain in my legs from an old injury.”
“Oh… can I get you something for it?”
“Just water is fine.” She digs through her bag and pulls out a bottle of ibuprofen, shaking it at me with a smile.
As I rush to the kitchen, unease coils in my stomach. She had been walking the whole time, and I hadn’t even noticed she was in pain. I pour two glasses of water, my hands trembling slightly as I hand one to her and settle down beside her.
“You should’ve told me you were hurting, Y/N. I would have gotten the car.”
“I’m all right.” She gives me a soft smile, glancing around my sparsely decorated apartment. “Your place is nice.”
Nice? It’s barren—like a forgotten room in an old house where laughter used to echo. I turn the glass of water in my hands, my mind racing. “Y/N, can I ask you something?”
She meets my gaze as I take a sip. “If you’re wondering if I’m a virgin, the answer is no.”
I choke on the water, caught off guard by her sudden candor. “Jesus Christ, woman, how drunk are you?”
“I’m not drunk at all. I’m just messing with you. What were you going to ask?”
I look at her, heat rising in my cheeks as the tension coils between us. “I was just curious about how you got injured,” I admit, my thoughts drifting to the whirlwind of emotions churning inside me.
“Oh, well… My mom and I were in a car accident. I broke my hip and both my legs.” She says it so casually, as if she’s recounting a minor scrape.
“What?”
“Yeah… it was okay, though. After rehab, I was as good as new!” She beams, her enthusiasm a stark contrast to the weight of her words.
“How long was rehab?”
“Long enough.” 
I remember something she mentioned earlier. “Long enough to make you miss a year in school?”
She responds with a grin and a nonchalant shrug. “Shit, Y/N. That sucks. I’m really sorry.”
“It’s all right. I’m actually glad it happened.” Her gaze drifts down to her legs, fingers tracing an invisible path over her thighs. “It brought my parents back together, just as they were meant to be.”
Her eyes return to mine, and the intensity of her words fills the air. “My parents got divorced when I was little, and my mom and I moved to Florida. But after the accident, my dad came to help, and they just… clicked, I guess. They’ve been together ever since.” She smiles proudly, and I sit there, stunned.
A strand of hair falls across her face, and I can’t resist the urge to tuck it behind her ear—an excuse to bridge the distance between us. With every detail she shares, I feel myself drawn closer, tangled in her life, as if I’m getting lost in her depths.
“Okay…” I set my glass down on the coffee table, the clink echoing like a heartbeat in the stillness. “I think you deserve the bed. I’ll take the couch.”
“Why?”
“Because I just made you walk—”
“It’s not your fault. I locked myself out.”
“Y/N, please…”
“Okay, okay… don’t get all grumpy on me.” She stands, and I hover over her, uncertain how to help, torn between the urge to support her and the instinct to maintain some distance.
“Hey, stop it.” She steadies herself with a hand on my arm. “I’m fine. I shouldn’t have said anything.”
I lead her to my bedroom, showing her where the bathroom is. I offer her some of my clothes to change into, but she declines, insisting it wouldn’t be the first time she slept in jeans.
She sits on the bed, and just as I’m about to leave, she calls out, “Yoongi?”
I turn, and she gestures for me to sit beside her, lying back on the comforter, vulnerability etched into her features.
I swallow hard as I lower myself next to her, the proximity amplifying the tension crackling in the air.
“I’m glad you don’t hate me anymore.”
I stare awkwardly at her, afraid to move and wake her up. Leaning back against the headboard, I let the silence linger, my mind racing with all the things I want to say. I want to know her—really know her—not just as the emotionally unavailable guy I’ve been until now.
Hoseok was right—I've got it bad for Y/N Y/L/N.
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I think I preferred it when Y/N was just a blurry thought in my mind, hidden behind a blindfold I’d created to shield my heart. Back then, I didn’t have to wrestle with the urge to kiss her or feel the tempting softness of her hair against my fingers. But now, the blindfold has slipped away, and so has my common sense. Here I am, a hopeless observer, lurking in the shadows as she sleeps, feeling like a total creep.
Her face is peaceful, like a canvas painted with serenity, only occasionally disturbed by the flutter of her lashes. Her lips form a perfect little "o," and the way her bangs fall delicately over her forehead sends my heart racing. I long to reach out, to push them aside, to bury my hands in her hair like I did before. Slowly, I lift my hand, inching it closer to her face, drawn to her like a moth to a flame.
“Jack!” Y/N suddenly cries out, her voice slicing through the silence like glass. My heart jumps. “There’s a boat, Jack!” The frown that creases her brow twists her serene expression into something frantic, as if she’s caught in a storm of dreams.
What is happening? Is she having a nightmare? Who’s Jack? 
Just as quickly, her face smooths over again, tranquility restored as if the storm has passed, leaving only a gentle breeze behind.
Isn’t it just my luck? Y/N talks in her sleep, and apparently, she’s got a soft spot for someone named Jack—maybe a sailor too. 
I could rent a boat. We could go sailing if she wanted. Maybe I could learn to sail. If Jack can do it, how hard could it be? Does she even like sailing? I’ll ask her tomorrow.
What am I even thinking? No, I’m not going to ask her tomorrow, because we aren’t going sailing. She can go with Jack for all I care.
I groan, burying my face in my hands, frustration and disbelief washing over me. I’ve seriously lost it. This is ridiculous.
“Fucking Jess ate my Chobani again,” Y/N mutters, jolting me from my thoughts. Jess? Who the hell is that? And what even is a Chobani?
I should go. I shouldn’t be here, lurking in the shadows, eavesdropping on this craziness.
“Jonah Rodgers thinks I’m sexy…” 
For the love of God! Is she trying to drive me mad?
Jonah Rodgers? The name sounds familiar. Do I know him? Is he that jerk who used to stalk her? 
The stalker. Damn it. If I were still T.A.-ing, I’d fail him for disrespecting Y/N in this way.
I can’t take this anymore. If she mentions another guy, I swear I’m going to lose it. I sit at the edge of the bed, ready to leave, but before I can move, Y/N speaks again.
“Does Yoongi think I’m sexy?” 
I do, I do, I do…
“Hmm… my Grumpy.” 
Her soft moan sends a jolt of electricity coursing through me, and I’m utterly unprepared—shredded, breathless, completely undone. 
Does she mean me? She called me Grumpy once, right? Said I was the only Grumpy she knew. Am I her Grumpy?
Shit, shit, shit!
I slump back against the headboard, the realization both thrilling and terrifying. 
Is Y/N dreaming about me? Is it wrong that this feels so right? That my heart is swelling with excitement at the thought of being part of her dreams?
I turn to look at her again. She’s frowning now, exaggerated and cute, her lips pouting in a way that tugs at my heart.
“Do not touch my samples, Becca!” Her voice is low and raspy. “Don’t be so happy, Becca!” And then she smiles, as if a hidden joke just crossed her mind. “Run, Becca! Run!” 
Oh, she’s definitely dreaming about me, just not in the way I had hoped.
She’s making fun of me—in her dreams.
Wonderful.
I groan, letting my head thud back against the headboard, staring up at the ceiling as disappointment settles over me like a heavy shroud. I shouldn’t be wishing for Y/N to dream about me; it would only complicate things. We can’t be together; this will never work.
In a year, I’ll graduate, and then it’ll be New York City, and Estelle all over again. Estelle and I had been together for four years when we graduated from Cornell. She wanted me to get a “real” job, to move with her to New York. She wanted me to abandon the chance for grad school at UW, to work at one of the top cancer research centers in the country. She made me choose, and I chose research.
And you know what? I have no regrets. Even though she didn’t know everything about my parents, she knew it mattered to me—she shouldn’t have made me choose. So when she said, “If you leave, we’re done,” I left. I figured I was better off alone, or as she put it, “end up alone and rot in lab hell.” It didn’t seem like such a sacrifice then—my relationship with Estelle was mediocre at best.
So, I dove headfirst into grad school and landed in one of the best labs in the program. I didn’t let any woman get in my way. I was focused, determined—until I woke up four years later, an angry, bitter shell of a man, nursing my bruised pride.
What a wake-up call that was! Suddenly, I started noticing everything—the things I fought so hard to ignore. I had worn blinders for so long, and I missed so much.
Honestly, I never expected to feel so unfulfilled.
Isn’t this what I wanted when I chose to leave Estelle? What am I missing? Why am I not enjoying my work anymore?
I glance at Y/N again. Her expression is peaceful once more, an angelic mask that makes me ache with longing. I can see myself falling for her easily—if I’m lucky, she might fall for me too. But then what? 
Then I’ll have to choose: my work, my life, what I owe to my parents, over her. She’ll make me choose, and I’ll choose science—cancer research—and it will shatter us both. This time, it would be the greatest sacrifice I’d ever have to make. And honestly, I’m not even sure I’d be strong enough to make that decision. If Y/N were to love me back, how could I hurt her like that?
I sigh, dragging a hand down my face, the weight of my thoughts pressing heavily on my chest.
Y/N is smiling now, giggling softly, her laughter a haunting melody in the quiet room. How someone can giggle in her sleep is beyond me. After a while, she calms, her breathing slowing even more. With a sigh, I close my eyes and wait, holding my breath for what she might say next.
I wake with a start, my neck and back screaming in protest from the unforgiving embrace of the headboard. I must’ve slept in the same awkward position all night, unmoving. Stretching my arms, I blink against the morning light, squinting at my watch. Seven o’clock. The realization hits me like a punch to the gut—Y/N is gone.
Rubbing my sore neck, I drag myself out of bed and around the apartment, searching for any sign of her. Her bag and heels are missing. An uneasy feeling churns in my stomach as I plod back to the bed, my mind racing with questions about where she could have gone so early. That’s when I notice the slip of paper on the nightstand.
Morning, Grumpy!   I had to leave to get my keys from the landlord.   Thanks for letting me crash last night.   Sorry for your sore neck.   Y/N. :)
I face-plant onto the bed with a groan, trying to drown out the hollow emptiness she left behind. Her scent lingers on the pillows, sweet and intoxicating, wrapping around me like a vise. I inhale deeply, the fragrance filling my lungs, but instead of comfort, it brings a gnawing ache. Grumpy... I’m her Grumpy. The thought claws at me, relentless and unyielding.
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Monday drags in like a slow, inevitable doom. I sit silently in the lunchroom with Hoseok, who prattles on about the success of the recruitment party. His voice is background noise, barely penetrating my thoughts. Thankfully, he hasn’t asked about Y/N yet.
“So, is Yoonji coming this weekend?” he asks, mid-chew of his sandwich.
“Yes. Friday,” I mutter, my mind elsewhere.
“Awesome! Oh man…” He swallows, excitement clear in his voice. “I can’t wait for next week! Spring Break: no undergrads, the gyms and bars all to ourselves!”
“Is it Spring Break next week?” My voice cracks, surprise jolting me back to reality. I had completely forgotten.
“Yeah!”
Great. My stomach twists with dread. Is Y/N leaving for Spring Break? She probably is, isn’t she? The uneasy feeling intensifies, so I shove a forkful of macaroni into my mouth, trying to silence it.
“What’s up your ass?” Hoseok asks suddenly, narrowing his eyes at me.
I shake my head, dismissing him
. “Nothing.”
“Nothing? Seriously?” His disbelief is palpable. “You look like you just downed a bottle of aspirin. Come on, tell me what’s wrong.” 
His eyes are kind, but they only intensify the frustration bubbling beneath the surface. 
I stare down at my plate, willing the irritation to simmer down. He’s my best friend—he deserves to know. But how can I explain this mess? The whirlwind of emotions swirling inside me? 
“Y/N…” I finally murmur, the name tasting foreign on my tongue. 
“Y/N? The girl you were with at the party? What about her?”
“Uh…she crashed here last night. She left this morning to get her keys from the landlord.” I avoid his gaze, my cheeks warming at the admission.
“Dude, that’s awesome!” he grins, elbowing me lightly. “So, you guys are getting serious?”
I scoff, shaking my head. “I don’t know about that.”
Hoseok’s smile falters. “What do you mean? You like her, right?”
“Of course I do!” The admission bursts out before I can stop myself, surprising both of us. I take a deep breath, trying to calm the tide of emotions swelling within me. “But it can’t go anywhere. She’s leaving, Hoseok. She’s probably going to some fancy college or… some fancy job.”
“So? You guys can make it work! Do you want to make it work?”
“I don’t know! I don’t want to hurt her. I can’t…” I trail off, frustration bubbling back to the surface. “I can’t let myself get caught up in this. I’ve worked too hard for my future to throw it all away for her.”
“Wait, what? Throw it all away? You really think you can’t have both? That you can’t just have fun while also focusing on your studies?”
I’m silent, my insides twisting again, a potent mix of anger and sadness at the thought of losing Y/N. “It’s not that simple,” I finally reply.
“Why not? You just told me she crashed here last night! You can’t pretend this doesn’t matter! You can’t keep running from it forever, Yoongi!” His voice rises, frustration spilling over.
“Why are you getting so worked up over this?” I snap, staring at him with incredulity.
“Because I’m sick of seeing you sulk, man!” His hands fly up in exasperation. “You can’t keep pretending like this doesn’t matter! Just tell her how you feel, for fuck’s sake!”
I shake my head, the weight of his words crashing down around me, the walls closing in. I feel suffocated, cornered. “What if she’s not interested? What if I scare her away?”
“Then at least you’ll know! At least you’ll have closure, and you can move on!” 
His voice rings in my ears, echoing through the tangled web of my thoughts. I look down, realizing he’s right. 
I take a deep breath, steadiness creeping back in. “You’re right.” I want to scream. “You’re so right.” But the truth sits heavy on my chest. 
But what if I’m not strong enough to risk everything again? What if I lose her before I ever get to really have her? 
When I get back to the lab, my phone beeps with a new email.
From: Y/N Y/L/N, ynyln(at)u(.)washington(.)edu   Sent: Monday, March 21, 2024, 1:18 PM   To: Yoongi Min, ygmin(at)u(.)washington(.)edu
Hey Yoongi,
Is it okay if I miss lab on Tuesday and Wednesday? I have midterms this week before Spring Break, but I promise I’ll make up for the lost time afterward.
Y/N
She’s leaving.
The thought crashes over me like a tidal wave, pulling me under, swirling with anxiety and dread. She won’t even be here this week. The uncertainty gnaws at my insides, promising nothing but torture ahead.
From: Yoongi Min, ygmin(at)u(.)washington(.)edu   Sent: Monday, March 21, 2024, 1:20 PM   To: Y/N Y/L/N, ynyln(at)u(.)washington(.)edu
Fine.
Yoongi Min   PhD Candidate   Kim Lab   Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center   1100 Fairview Avenue North   Seattle, WA 98109-1024
It’s official: I fucking hate Spring Break.
As soon as I get home, desperation drives me to call Yoonji. I tell myself it’s to find out when Y/N will be back, but really, I need to spill everything—the kiss, the night Y/N slept in my bed, the haunting thought of her heading to Cabo for Spring Break.
“Yoongi, I just don’t understand,” Yoonji says, her voice cutting through the fog in my mind. I’m sprawled on the couch, head tilted back, an arm draped over my eyes like a shield against reality.
“To be honest, I think what you’re doing is stupid,” she continues, her frustration palpable. “You’re miserable. I can feel it. Why won’t you give yourself a chance to—”
“To what, Yoonji? You remember what happened with Estelle.”
“Please, Estelle was an unsupportive bitch.”
“I don’t even know Y/N that well!” I blurt out, my voice sharper than I intended. The fear of history repeating itself looms over me like a dark cloud.
“Y/N won’t make you choose, Yoongi.”
“You don’t know that.”
“You said she’s incredibly determined, that she loves research even more than you used to. That doesn’t sound like someone who would oppose you continuing on this path.”
“I don’t know, Yoonji.” I sigh, running my hands over my face, feeling the weight of her words settle heavily on my shoulders.
“Give yourself the opportunity to get to know her. Don’t deny yourself the chance to be with her just because you’re afraid to feel something.”
“I’m not afraid of feeling anything,” I snap, though the truth is, I’m drowning in emotions already. “But I’ll be done with the program in a year.”
“So what? A lot can happen in a year. You know that better than anyone.”
I groan, conceding. She’s right. She’s always right.
“You’re hurting. You care about her, Yoongi. Why do you have to be so blind?” Yoonji’s frustration seeps through the phone, and I can almost picture her pacing, running a hand through her hair.
“What do you suggest I do? Ask her out?” I retort, the idea weighing heavily on my mind. “She’s my undergrad! I don’t even know if she’s interested in me.”
“Didn’t you say she kissed you back?”
“Yes. But she also said she didn’t want to jeopardize her experience in the lab.”
“That means she’s smart. You shouldn’t let your feelings affect your work, especially if she’s under you. But that doesn’t mean you can’t have a relationship outside of lab.”
The thought of being with Y/N outside those sterile walls sends my heart racing. I lean back against the couch, releasing a shaky breath I didn’t know I was holding.
“Have you talked about it again? Have you told her how you feel?” Yoonji presses, her voice softening.
“No. I decided to pretend it never happened.”
“Geez, Yoongi. For such a smart guy, you can be so dense.” Her exasperated sigh echoes in my ears, and I remain silent, letting her words sink in. “You need to talk to her, tell her what’s going on. See what she wants. Tell her what you want.”
Staring at the ceiling, I weigh the possibility of confessing my feelings to Y/N. The prospect terrifies me, yet the urge to be honest gnaws at my insides.
“Yoongi, do you know what you want?” she asks gently.
“Yes. I want to go to sleep.” 
Her frustrated sigh tells me she senses I’m closing off again.
“Do you want to be with her?” she probes softly.
“I’ve never wanted anyone more.”
The truth spills out, raw and unfiltered. Her squeal of excitement on the other end makes me rub my hands on my thighs, trying to contain my nerves.
“Then do yourself a favor and talk to her. I’d bet good money she’s already crazy about you.” Her enthusiasm is contagious, and I find myself considering it more seriously.
We end the call, but sleep eludes me. Images of Y/N in a bikini invade my mind, and there’s no chance of me sleeping tonight.
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When I step back into the lab on Thursday after lunch, I’m completely unprepared for the sight of Y/N. She’s there, smiling, and it catches me off guard, my heart racing like it’s just run a marathon. I thought she’d be gone by now, off to live her Spring Break fantasies. My mind has been a battlefield all week, flooded with images of her carefree adventures. Googling “Spring Break activities” had been a catastrophic mistake.
She’s not in her usual lab coat today; instead, she’s wearing a fitted sweater that hugs her figure just right, the V-neck revealing a tantalizing hint of her collarbones. The dark fabric contrasts beautifully with her pale skin, and my imagination betrays me, picturing that skin in a bikini. All I can see is red.
Thankfully, Jimin is nowhere in sight.
“I thought you had better things to do this week,” I say, my voice sharper than I intended as I walk past her, heading toward my desk.
“What do you mean?” Her smile vanishes, replaced by confusion.
“I didn’t know you were coming today. I don’t have time for this.” I wave my hand dismissively, trying to suppress the storm brewing inside me.
“For what? I—I don’t understand.”
These lies spill from my mouth uncontrollably. “Honestly, Y/N, sometimes I think you’re just here for the credits. This isn’t how science works. You need to be consistent.” My voice rises, and I see her flinch.
“Why are you yelling at me? Is this because I missed two days? I’m sorry, Yoongi. I had to study. I promise I’ll make up for it.”
I rub my forehead, frustration clawing at my insides. I know this isn’t her fault, but the anger bubbles over. “Have fun on Spring Break,” I grit out as I storm past her, my heart pounding in my chest.
“Yoongi?” she calls after me, but I keep walking, desperate for fresh air. The cool spring breeze feels like a lifeline, and I gulp it in, trying to calm the chaos inside me. I can’t keep doing this. This is madness.
I don’t get far before I hear Y/N’s voice again, breathless and firm. “Yoongi, what’s the matter with you?” I hadn’t realized she’d followed me. I turn around, and there she is—confused, hurt, and heartbreakingly beautiful.
There’s no point in pretending anymore. I can’t keep up the facade. “I don’t think you really want to know, Y/N.” I run a hand down my face, trying to keep my composure.
She crosses her arms, waiting, an expectant look in her eyes.
“I fucking hate Spring Break, okay? I hate the thought of you parading around with some frat losers, being young, drunk, and reckless. I hate it. I hate all of it.”
Her expression shifts from confusion to understanding, and she relaxes, placing her hands on her hips. A corner of her mouth quirks up. “What are you talking about?”
Is she seriously smirking?
“I’m talking about you going to Cabo San Lucas for Spring Break.”
“Who said I was going to Cabo?” Now she’s fully smiling.
“I don’t know, I just assumed… aren’t you all?” I mumble, embarrassed.
“You have some serious misconceptions about undergrads, Yoongi. We’re not all the same. And that’s not me at all.”
“So you’re not going away for Spring Break?” I ask, still staring at my feet, not wanting to look her in the eye.
“No, I’m not. I was actually looking forward to spending more time in the lab, making up for this week.”
Relief floods through me, but it’s tangled with a crushing sense of shame. “You’re not going away? You’re staying here?” My voice is barely a whisper.
“Yes. That’s what I said.”
I stagger back, feeling like an idiot. I can’t believe I snapped at her like that. As my anger fades, embarrassment rushes in, making my knees feel weak. I might seriously pass out.
“Yoongi? Are you all right?”
I let out a humorless laugh. No, I’m not all right. This is too much.
She steps closer, and I know I won’t be able to resist kissing her if she comes any nearer. I lift my hand in warning and take another step back.
“Yoongi?” Ignoring my gesture, she moves closer and stands right in front of me.
I close my eyes, the truth spilling out uncontrollably. “All I could think about was some punk with his shirt off, a baseball cap on backward, shoving beer down your throat... and it made me want to murder someone.” My hand clutches my chest, heart racing.
She giggles—at my agony? My eyes snap open, and her smile fades under my intense stare. “These past few days have been torture,” I continue. “I can’t get you out of my mind. All I can think about is you—your lips on mine, your legs around my waist. You drive me insane, Y/N. I can’t think straight.”
Y/N’s eyes shine with emotion, and she closes the distance between us, resting her head against my chest. My hand instinctively finds its way to the back of her head, fingers tangling in her hair. She pulls away slightly, and I lift her chin with two fingers, forcing her to meet my gaze. Her eyes glisten, her bottom lip caught between her teeth, cheeks flushed a delicate pink.
When our lips touch, the electric current between us is undeniable. I close my eyes, exhaling through my nose, and cup her face, my thumb brushing her ear, fingers caressing her neck. Y/N grips my shirt, pulling herself closer. When my tongue slips into her mouth, a moan escapes me at the sweetness of her taste.
I can’t stay away from her anymore. I’m not strong enough.
Y/N wraps a hand around my neck, pulling me even closer. My hand travels down her back, wrapping tightly around her waist. I know she can feel my arousal pressing against her, but I don’t care. When she whimpers against my mouth, I know she feels the same.
Is it possible she’s been yearning for this as much as I have? 
Tell her what you want, Min.
“Y/N, wait.” I gently push her back, keeping one hand on her face. She stumbles slightly, holding onto my arm, looking dazed. “I don’t want this to be another kiss you regret. I don’t want you to be swept away by the moment. I want… I want more.”
She gapes at me, panting.
“I’m sorry I’m being so blunt, but I can’t hide this anymore.” I drop my hands to my sides and step back.
“What are you trying to say, Yoongi?” Her confusion is evident.
“What I’m trying to say is that I want to see you tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow? I-I think I can come in the afternoon between classes.”
“Jesus Christ, Y/N! Would you listen to me? I don’t need you to come to the lab. I want to see you outside of the lab.”
I pinch my nose, trying to calm down, afraid my intensity will scare her away.
“Oh…”
“My cousin is coming to visit. We’re all going out for drinks. Do you want to come with me?”
She looks at me, and then she nods. “Okay.”
Okay… she said yes. Oh my god, she said yes.
I take a deep breath. “I’m sorry I snapped at you like that.”
“I know,” she replies, giving me a small grin that weakens my knees. My hand reaches for her face again, addicted to the softness of her skin as I brush her hair behind her ear and stroke her cheek. She stares into my eyes, cheeks burning, and I’m debating whether to kiss her again when I see Jin’s car pull into the parking lot, and I drop my hand immediately.
Shit…
Y/N glances back and sees Jin getting out of his car.
“I should go study, then…” She looks back at me, and I nod, feeling a mix of regret and anticipation. “I’ll catch you later. Call me about tomorrow.�� She brushes a timid finger down my arm before turning to leave.
I stay outside for a few more minutes, gathering my thoughts and waiting for my heart to calm down. 
I did it. I asked Y/N out... sort of.
Now what?
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Yoonji had turned into a shadow in my apartment, trailing me as I prepared for what felt like the most important night of my life. “Have you been using that stubble trimmer I got you?” she asked, her fingers grazing my jaw as if she were assessing a work of art. 
I nodded, feeling uneasy under her watchful gaze. Deep down, I was already regretting the group date we had planned. The thought of going out with Y/N sent my heart racing; adding my cousin and a few friends into the mix felt like a cosmic joke, and I was definitely the punchline. 
As I rifled through my chaotic closet, I tried to tune her out, running my fingers through my damp hair in a futile attempt to calm my nerves. 
“I think I’ve died and gone to heaven.” Leave it to Yoonji to treat every moment like a Broadway performance. I shot her a glare, barely suppressing my frustration as I swept past her in search of my jacket. 
“You’re wearing a polo shirt?” she challenged, disbelief lacing her tone. 
“What’s wrong with a polo shirt?” I snapped, slapping my hands against my thighs in exasperation. The anxiety gnawed at me, and her judgment only fueled the fire. 
Yoonji stepped closer, her expression softening. “Yoongi, my oblivious cousin, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that polo shirt. As long as it doesn’t have holes in it.” 
Relief washed over me like a tide, momentarily pushing my worries aside. I had never cared much for her opinion on my wardrobe; that had never mattered before. But tonight? It wasn’t Yoonji’s approval I craved—it was Y/N’s. I wanted to be more than the cynical grad student she saw in class.
“You look great,” Yoonji said, her smile coaxing a small, reluctant grin from me in return. “If just thinking about her has you acting like this nervous mess, I already know I’m going to love her.”
Yoonji had made it clear she’d ride with Hoseok and Serena so I could pick up Y/N alone. Now, I found myself parked outside her building, panic clawing at my insides. My palms felt clammy as I smoothed them over my thighs, my heart thumping violently against my ribs, and my mouth was desert-dry. It had been ages since I’d done anything like this. Estelle and I had never ventured out much together; I had buried myself in my studies while she lived her own life, leaving me utterly out of practice.
Despite the storm of anxiety raging within me, excitement bubbled up as I thought of Yoonji, Hoseok, and even Serena meeting Y/N. They needed to see how extraordinary she was—smart, caring, and hilariously funny. What thrilled me most was the prospect of spending time with Y/N outside the sterile confines of our lab, engaging with her as something more than just colleagues.
I banged my head against the steering wheel a few times, trying to settle my frayed nerves. My heart leaped when a knock on the window broke through my spiraling thoughts. There she was—Y/N, standing outside with that bright smile and a wave. I quickly unlocked the door, feeling like an utter fool. 
“Hey…” she said as she slid into the car. 
“I’m sorry. I was going to get you. Just… got distracted,” I admitted, feeling like an idiot for letting her down.
“It’s okay.” She shrugged. “Better this way anyway. I didn’t want Jess to see us.”
“Jess?” The name floated through my mind, familiar yet vague—wasn’t she the one from Y/N’s sleep ramblings? The one with the boat?
“Jessica, my roommate,” she explained. “She was in your class last year, and she knows I’m working in your lab… so I don’t want any rumors spreading, you know?”
“My class?” I felt disbelief surge within me. How could this be?
“Intro to Micro. Last Fall. You were our T.A.,” she said matter-of-factly.
“What?” 
“We were both in your class,” she added, unfazed by my shock.
“I was your T.A. last year?”
“Yes.” 
“Are you sure it was me?” I grasped at straws. How could I have overlooked her?
She turned toward me, eyebrow raised in that cute way she had. “Oh, I’m sure.” 
“I’m so sorry,” I blurted out. How could I have forgotten her? 
“It’s okay. You keep to yourself. I get it.” 
“Do we know each other from anywhere else?” My worry twisted into a knot. Had I brushed past her countless times, completely blind to her presence? 
So much time wasted. How incredibly foolish of me.
“Just that class in the fall. Unless you count all the times I waved at you at the gym or smiled at you every Saturday as you passed by my table at the library after getting your coffee.” 
She had been right there all along, and I had missed her completely.
“Shit, Y/N. I’m so sorry. I’ve been such an idiot!” I pounded the heel of my hand against my forehead a few times, embarrassment crashing over me.
“Hey, it’s okay.” Y/N reached for my hand, gently pulling it away from my face.
“No, it’s not. I was completely blind… and I feel like I’ve wasted so much time.” 
“Well, I’m here now…” She smiled, releasing my hand.
“You are.” 
“And you can see me now, right?” 
“You’re all I see now…” The truth swelled in my chest, echoing through me. Y/N was all that mattered, the only one who could unravel this tangled mess of a heart I had. 
“You see?” she said, clasping her hands over her lap. “When you say stuff like that, it makes it really hard to believe you can be such a grump.” She smiled, a shy yet bold thing, and my instinct was to lean in and kiss her, but I tamped down my urge for the sake of the group date.
“Well, no need to worry. I’m still very much a grump.” I offered a wry smile, taking a deep breath. “Shall we do this?” 
Y/N nodded, and I started the car. 
I didn’t mind being a grump, as long as I could be her grump.
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When we pulled up to the bar, I rushed to open Y/N's door, but of course, she was already climbing out by the time I reached her side. My gaze landed on the exposed skin of her collarbones, the freckles scattered across her chest—how had I missed them in the car?
Her white top hung loosely on her frame, the neckline dipping low enough to reveal just a hint too much. Luckily, she wore something underneath, but the sheer fabric let me catch glimpses of her silhouette. Apparently, I wasn’t the only one who noticed—some guy outside was staring at her like she was the last meal on earth. My hand found her lower back as I guided her inside, urgency propelling me forward.
Hoseok, Yoonji, and Serena were already at a table, and when Yoonji spotted us, her face lit up like it was Christmas morning. I half-expected her to pull out a camera.
“Y/N, this is my cousin, Yoonji. Yoonji, this is Y/N.” Before I could finish my introduction, Yoonji sprang to her feet.
“Y/N!” she exclaimed, pulling Y/N into an enthusiastic embrace. Her eyes sparkled with joy as she cast me a cheeky grin. “It’s so nice to finally meet you!”
“Yoonji, calm down,” I thought, but I couldn’t help but feel a flutter of excitement. 
“Nice to meet you too, Yoonji,” Y/N replied, her sweetness radiating like a warm glow.
“And you’ve already met Hoseok and Serena.” I gestured to the other two goofballs, who were now staring at Y/N like she was some kind of celestial being.
“Hi, Y/N! How’s life in the undergraduate world?” Hoseok teased as I pulled out a chair for her.
“Lotta drinking, lotta partying… you know, same old, same old.” Y/N shrugged, grinning, and I could see she had already charmed Hoseok.
“So… let’s get to the important stuff.” Hoseok waved a hand at me, a smirk growing on his face. I knew it wouldn’t take long for the teasing to kick in. I rolled my eyes.
“Oh! I know! Yoongi is wearing a polo shirt,” Serena piped up.
“I guess hell froze over, baby,” Hoseok snorted.
“I completely approve, by the way,” Yoonji chimed in, not even bothering to glance my way.
Here we go. I was about to shoot them all a glare when Y/N’s gentle touch on my thigh sent my heart soaring. My eyes darted to hers—she wore a smile that made everything else fade away.
“The cologne… maybe a tad too much?” I heard Serena say.
“Hey, I suggested that!” Yoonji shot back.
The banter continued, but I was lost in Y/N’s gaze, enchanted by the way her eyes sparkled when she smiled at me. The world around us dimmed; it was just her fingers entwined with mine, brushing softly against my palm, the gentle caress of her thumb sending shivers down my spine.
A moment too soon, Y/N turned to address the others. “Why do you guys talk about him like he’s not in the room?” Her words hung in the air, stunning everyone into silence.
I couldn’t believe it. In less than an hour, she had managed to charm my friends while cutting straight to the heart of the matter.
“Well, you’re with him now,” Yoonji finally said, a sly smile creeping across her face. “It’s our job to protect you.”
I would have preferred they protect me from their embarrassing stories, but Y/N seemed to revel in it.
“Protect me from what?” she asked, laughter bubbling in her voice.
“His awful sense of humor,” Serena said, her eyes dancing with mischief.
“Okay, I’m warning you,” I said, grinning back. “You may want to turn around and leave right now.”
Y/N giggled, clearly enjoying herself.
“Hey, if you leave me now, I’m going to assume you’re all crazy,” she said, her smile wide and infectious. 
I couldn’t help but smile back, knowing this night was going to be unforgettable.
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As night settled over us, the world transformed into a playground of laughter and playful banter, wrapped in a soft, velvety blanket. The drinks flowed like a tide, and my heart raced with the electric thrill of the evening. I watched Y/N mingle with my friends, and in that moment, something inside me sparked to life, hinting at possibilities I had yet to explore.
I leaned closer, our shoulders brushing, a daring move that sent butterflies fluttering in my stomach. “What are you doing to me?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.
“Just being me,” she replied, her tone light, but the glimmer in her eyes suggested deeper currents.
“Can I hold your hand?” The request slipped from my lips, fragile as a moth's wing.
Surprise flickered across her face as she weighed my words. “Yes.”
The moment our fingers intertwined, warmth rushed through me, narrowing my focus to the electric connection between us. In the distance, Hoseok's teasing banter continued, and Yoonji was lost in conversation with Serena, but they faded into the background. All that mattered was Y/N and the magnetic pull that bound us together.
Yoonji’s voice broke through my reverie. "I'm staying with Em and Serena tonight," she whispered in my ear.
“Yoonji, you don’t need to—”
“Nonsense!” she insisted, her grin stretching wide. “I love her,” she mouthed as she walked away, and I couldn’t help but smile, glancing down at Y/N.
“Oh, you’re not coming with us?” Y/N asked, her curiosity piqued.
“Nope! I need to help Serena pick an outfit for tomorrow. It was really nice to meet you, Y/N. I hope to see you soon!” Yoonji hugged her again, whispering something I couldn’t catch.
Before long, Y/N and I were walking toward my car. I opened the door for her, and she smiled as she slid in. As I drove to her apartment, she asked about Yoonji and our bond. I shared how I moved in with them when I was thirteen, how we’d become like siblings, grateful she didn’t pry into the reasons behind it. Tonight wasn’t the time for shadows of my past.
A comfortable silence fell between us, an unspoken acknowledgment of the fleeting moments we shared. Soon, we arrived in front of her building, and reality crashed in—I was running out of time.
“Can I be honest?” she asked, her voice breaking the silence like a warm breeze.
“Please… always.”
“I don’t want to go home just yet.” She looked at me through her lashes, and my heart raced, a wild beat echoing in my chest.
“Can I be honest too?” I asked, inching closer.
She nodded, biting her lip.
“I really want to kiss you right now.” I leaned in slightly.
Her breath hitched, and she let out a soft sigh. “Can I? Kiss you?” My voice was barely audible, filled with anticipation.
She nodded once, a small smile lighting up her face. I reached for her, brushing her hair back before gently cupping the nape of her neck and pulling her closer.
Our kiss started softly, exploring each other with tentative tenderness. But it quickly grew desperate, fueled by a hunger we could no longer deny. Her hand gripped my shirt, pulling me closer—just as eager. I let my hands roam, one resting on her thigh while the other tangled in her hair, my heart racing with every heartbeat.
“Y/N…” I breathed against her neck, fighting to maintain control. “You need to go inside now, or I don’t think I’ll be able to let you go.”
“Why don’t you come inside with me?” She pulled my face from her neck, her eyes shimmering with mischief and warmth. “Jessica should be gone by now. It’s Spring Break, remember? I might be the only undergrad left.”
The invitation hung in the air, electric and intoxicating. She wanted me to come home with her. Alone. My mind raced as I followed her into her cozy apartment, a space filled with personal touches and the inviting scent of vanilla.
“Welcome to Casa de Jess and Y/N!” she announced, her excitement infectious. “Do you want a tour, Mister?”
I grinned at her playful spirit. “If you’d be so kind, Madam.”
With exaggerated politeness, she led me through her apartment, showing off each room like a proud hostess. “And this is my bedroom.” When she opened the door, my breath caught. It looked like a whimsical explosion of color—pink and feathers everywhere, a bright pink comforter proclaiming “Little Princess” in white letters.
“Oh dear God…” I muttered, glancing around.
“What do you think?” she asked, a hint of seriousness in her tone.
I scratched my neck, searching for the right words. “Um… well… interesting choice of colors, Y/N.”
She burst into laughter, the sound bright and carefree, and I looked at her, puzzled.
“Oh my God! Your face! Priceless!” she exclaimed, doubling over in giggles. “This is Jessica's room!” She laughed so hard she had to lean against the doorframe for support.
“Oh thank God…” I exhaled in relief. “I don’t think I could sleep in here without having nightmares.” I leaned against the doorframe, smiling at the chaos.
But then, her expression shifted from playful to serious as she stepped closer. “Do you expect to be sleeping in my bed anytime soon, Mr. Min?”
“Shit… no… I’m sorry. That’s not what I meant.” I ran a hand through my hair, mortified.
“Hey…” She stepped between my legs, her hand resting on my chest. “I was joking.” She smiled up at me, and my heart raced. I wanted her, needed her, craved her.
I traced her lip with my thumb. “You know what’s the first thing I noticed about you, Y/N?” She shook her head, her gaze locked on mine. “Your smile… It’s beautiful.”
Her smile widened. “When you smile, you get all gummy and your face softens. Your teeth are small, too. It’s adorable.”
“Adorable? Here I am, telling you I love your smile, and you tell me mine is imperfect. I’m hurt,” I joked, placing a hand over my heart.
“It’s not imperfect. It’s crooked and mind-blowingly sexy.” She giggled, and I couldn’t help but snort.
“See? There it is.” She framed my face with her hands and pulled me into a kiss. Her lips were soft, and I tried to crouch down to level us, but it felt awkward. Instead, I lifted her by the waist, her legs wrapping around my hips. Y/N’s arms encircled my neck as she deepened the kiss. When her tongue slipped into my mouth, I moaned, pressing her against the doorframe where laughter had just echoed.
My breath came in desperate gasps as I pulled away, kissing along her neck, but the fire ignited within me burned too bright to resist. Her whimpers drove me wild, and there was only so much I could take.
“Next door to the left,” she whispered in my ear.
Holy shit…
I carried her to her bedroom, still wrapped around me. As soon as I opened the door, her scent enveloped me, divine and overwhelming. Trying to stay composed, I ended up slumping onto the bed with her. She squealed and giggled, pulling off my polo shirt. Her hand traced patterns on my chest, making me shudder.
Every cell in my body was on high alert, every touch amplified.
"Y/N…" I groaned when her fingers traced the button-fly of my jeans. "You make me feel like a fucking teenager."
She giggled as my lips found hers. Her hand slipped into my boxers, and when she grasped me, I groaned loudly into her lips. She stroked me tentatively, softly but firmly. After a few strokes, it was too much.
"Y/N, stop… please," I begged, panting into her neck. "I’m going to cum in your hand. I need to slow down."
"Sorry." She released me, sighing. "Too much… too soon?"
"Yes… No… I-I just need a minute." I pressed my forehead into her neck, trying to regain control.
"Okay," she whispered, her hand returning to my hair.
My hands found their way under her shirt, pulling it off. The sight of her, arms stretched above her head, devilish smile on her lips, took my breath away.
"Polkadots?" I teased as her hands flew to my neck, pulling me back into a kiss. Her kisses were eager, biting and pulling at my lip, straining my self-control.
I kissed her neck, my hand slipping under her back. "God, you are so beautiful…" I whispered, unclasping her bra.
Her bra off, I trailed kisses from her neck to her chest, my hands cupping her breasts. Y/N squirmed under me, her moans driving me crazy.
"Can I touch you now?" Her voice was raspy with desire.
"Not yet," I whispered, unbuttoning her jeans.
"Not fair…" she moaned as my fingers dipped into her panties.
My fingers found nothing but wetness, silkiness, and smoothness, a tantalizing blend that drove me wild with anticipation. My dick throbbed painfully as I ground against her leg, barely able to contain myself any longer.
“God, Y/N…” I murmured, my voice a strained whisper.
She whimpered beneath me, her body trembling as my fingers traced circles to pleasure her. I slipped one finger inside, then another, and her scream of my name filled the room, echoing in my ears like a symphony of ecstasy. The sheer joy of her response made me want to cry into her neck.
“Yoongi, please…” she panted, her hands pulling at my hair, desperate. “I want to touch you… please… I need to feel you.”
God…
In one swift move, I had Y/N completely naked beneath me, her chest heaving with gasps. I fumbled for the condom in my wallet, and in mere seconds, I was naked too, hovering over her. Wrapping her wrist in my hand, I guided her to touch me—every inch of me.
Her hand clasped around me, guiding me to her entrance, spreading her wetness. I kept one hand on her breast, the other gripping the blanket next to her face, my control slipping with every passing second. Our eyes locked, the intensity between us palpable.
“Yoongi, what are we doing?” Her hand still gripped me, her voice a mix of wonder and worry.
“God… I don’t know…” I panted, my forehead resting on her neck.
“Is this wrong?”
“Feels right to me.” I groaned into her shoulder as she increased the pressure with her hand.
“I mean… isn’t this against the rules?”
How could she be coherent right now? I was on the brink of losing it, and I wasn’t even inside her yet!
“I-I don’t know, Y/N… Honestly, the rules are very blurry right now.”
“I want you,” she whispered huskily into my ear.
“God, Y/N. I want you too… so fucking much.”
“Would we get in trouble for this?” Her voice held a clear note of worry.
I lifted my head to meet her gaze. “I don’t know… I don’t care… Do you?”
Please, please, please, don’t ask me to stop now. Please…
She shook her head, pulling my face closer to hers in a kiss, positioning herself for me to enter her.
Thank you, God.
Our eyes stayed locked as our bodies connected, the sensation of being surrounded by her utterly mind-blowing. I needed a moment to adjust, Y/N’s moans and the arch of her back driving me insane as I slowly reached the deepest part of her.
I pulled out as slowly as I could manage, then pushed back in. My eyes rolled back, hands gripping her hips, a moan escaping through my clenched jaw. Nothing in my life had ever compared to this, to being with her. No one came even close.
Our bodies moved in sync, and a new terror gripped me: the fear of not lasting long enough to satisfy her. I sought distractions in her breasts, her neck, her lips, but every part of her only turned me on more.
So, I distracted myself mentally, reciting the first thing that came to mind:
There’s antimony, arsenic, aluminum, selenium… And hydrogen and oxygen and nitrogen and rhenium... And nickel, neodymium, neptunium, germanium… And iron, americium, ruthenium, uranium…
The words spun through my mind, a desperate attempt to hold onto control, as I plunged deeper into the intoxicating feeling of her.
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It's Tuesday morning, and the sun hasn't even thought about rising yet. The lab calls out to me with its endless list of tasks, each one promising that today won't be long enough to tackle them all. I feel exhausted, bone-deep weary from days that have been both draining and, honestly, the best of my life.
Y/N and I spent the weekend wrapped up in each other, mostly on her bed or the couch. It’s a novel experience for me—taking a break from work on a weekend—but I still managed to squeeze in some research: exploring every inch of Y/N’s body, learning her curves, her soft spots, and the way she sighs when she’s lost in the moment. I’m hopelessly addicted, and I doubt I’ll ever get enough.
In between those moments of passion, she opened up about her family, her childhood, and the accident that changed everything. I kept my past hidden, deflecting the conversation back to her with more questions. I learned that I influenced her decision to join Jin’s lab; she remembered me from my time as her oblivious T.A. I teased her about being a little stalker, but the truth is, I loved hearing her talk.
Y/N could chatter for hours, and more surprisingly, I found that I could listen willingly and happily. She’s an amazing cook, and with each passing day, she feels more and more like a miracle. I kept adding to my mental list of quirky Y/N facts: her underwear is never a solid color—always striped or patterned, like the bra with little pineapples. She re-watches movies until she knows the dialogue by heart. When she made me watch a film about the Titanic, I laughed when I thought it was a documentary. After that, I decided against any sailing plans.
But Monday brought a harsh return to reality. Seeing her in the lab, just out of reach, was torture—pun intended. She wanted to dive into her experiments, and since I skipped the lab all weekend, I had a mountain of work to tackle. We managed to keep things professional, but the tension in the air was thick. Monday nights were reserved for her family’s Skype calls, leaving me alone, tossing and turning in my bed, missing her like crazy.
As I trudged through the hallways, still groggy, I spotted Y/N sitting by the lab door. With her earphones in, she was bobbing her head, lost in her own world. The moment she saw me, she pulled them out, a broad smile lighting up her face.
I swear I’ll never tire of that smile…
“God, Y/N. What are you doing here so early?” I grumble, struggling to match her morning cheer.
“I couldn’t sleep! I’m dying to see if the experiment worked!” she exclaims, bouncing on her toes.
Of course…
“Mhm” I mumble, fumbling for the keys. 
“It’s nerve-racking! A whole day of work, then waiting sixteen hours—sixteen hours!—to see the results?” 
The key sticks in the lock, and I jiggle it impatiently. 
“C’mon, c’mon…” she chants, practically bouncing.
“Y/N…” I groan, turning to her. “I haven’t had coffee yet. Would you calm down?”
Finally, the door clicks open, and she bolts inside, nearly tripping over me. She rushes straight to the incubator, while I drag myself to my desk, her excited chants of “YES! YES! YES!” echoing behind me.
I can’t help but snort. I guess her experiment worked.
She sets the petri dishes on the bench, and her squeal of delight fills the room. “They worked!” she cries, launching herself at me. I barely catch her as she wraps her legs around my waist.
How does she have this much energy? It’s not even eight yet!
“Jesus Christ, woman! What are you on this morning?” 
Her arms encircle my neck, and she beams at me, making my own lips twitch upward.
“Hi, Grumpy.” She runs a hand through my hair.
“Hi…”
“Good morning.”
“Morning, Y/N.”
Her lips find mine, and I’m a goner. I moan into her mouth as she tugs at my hair, ready to take her right there on the bench, on the floor—anywhere. But we’re in the lab.
“Y/N…” I whisper, kissing her neck.
“Hmmm?”
“Someone might come in.” I nibble her earlobe, making her squirm.
“It’s early,” she whispers, her voice husky as she pulls at my hair. 
God…
I set her down on the bench, clumsily knocking over some plates. “Shit... sorry.” I try to pick them up, but she’s pulling at my jeans, pressing herself against me, and I make a bigger mess.
“Did you touch my samples?” she asks, feigning anger, echoing my words from when I snapped at her earlier.
I smile, but the way she bites her lip and the hooded look in her eyes snaps my resolve. My lips crash into hers, and my hands slide under her shirt as I press her back onto the bench, scattering more plates.
Fuck, I’m going to ruin her experiment.
I lift her, her legs locking around my waist. I mean to move her to the unused bench behind me, but her grinding against me messes with my balance. I knock over a chair, slamming my back against the corner of the bench. Groaning in pain, I secure her in my arms.
“Are you okay?” 
The pain clears my head. Reality rushes back, and I realize what we’re about to do—in the lab, on a Tuesday morning, when anyone could walk in.
Just then, I hear rattling keys from the hallway.
Fuck…
I set Y/N down, and she stumbles. I steady her, stepping back just as Jimin walks in.
Y/N smooths her shirt, picking up plates, her face a vivid crimson. I run a hand through my hair, rubbing my sore back with the other. The pain is nothing compared to the throbbing in my pants, but there’s no fixing that now.
Jimin looks at us, eyebrows raised, then heads to his desk. I let out a sigh, glancing at Y/N—she’s still picking up plates, cheeks burning.
Could we be any more obvious?
Y/N and I were deep in conversation about her results, our voices low enough that Jimin, across the lab, pretended not to be listening. Y/N’s work was nothing short of exceptional, and while pride swelled within me, I needed to keep it grounded in reality. Success like this was rare; she needed to understand its value, to cherish it, but also to brace for the inevitable setbacks.
“Are you familiar with Murphy’s Law?” I asked as she finished jotting down her notes.
“Of course,” she replied, turning to face me, her eyes sparkling. “Did you know his first name was Edward?”
“What? No.” Murphy, as far as I was concerned, was just Murphy.
“Yep. Edward Murphy,” she said, her face serious as she began tidying up her workspace.
“You’re kidding,” I said, moving closer, disbelief evident in my voice.
“Nope.”
“How do you know that?”
“I watch Jeopardy a lot.” A small, embarrassed smile tugged at her lips as our eyes met.
“Why am I not surprised?” I muttered, watching her shrug off her lab coat. Her movements were effortlessly captivating.
“Were you going to say something about Murphy?” she asked, snapping me out of my daze.
“Yeah, right,” I said, shaking off the distraction. “Murphy’s Law applies to the lab too.”
“Oh, I know. ‘Everything that can go wrong will go wrong,’” she recited, her tone matter-of-fact.
“Exactly.” I nodded, impressed.
“But I don’t believe in that,” she said firmly, a spark of defiance lighting her features.
“Of course you don’t.” I had inched closer, almost beside her now.
She gestured toward her successful experiment, a triumphant smile spreading across her face. “Murphy was just a pessimist.”
“And you’re a glass-half-full kind of person?” I probed, towering over her with a teasing grin.
“Technically, the glass is always full. Half with water, half with air.” Her eyes crinkled with mischief.
“Are you trying to be a smart ass?” I leaned my elbow on the bench, bringing us face to face.
“That depends,” she said, her voice dropping, locking her gaze onto mine. 
“On what?”
“Do you like smart asses?” She traced a finger along my forearm, sending an electric jolt through my body.
I staggered back, giving her a warning look. She couldn’t be doing this to me—not now.
“Anyway,” she continued, taking a deep breath, “how many of Murphy’s laws do you know?”
Classic Y/N—always one step ahead. I sighed, admitting, “Just the one.”
“That’s it?” Her eyebrows shot up in surprise.
“Enlighten me, then.”
“‘Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse,’” she recited proudly, and I found her knowledge oddly attractive.
A glance at the clock reminded me of the work ahead. How inconvenient.
“That’s a good one. And it’s true,” I said.
“‘Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value,’” she continued.
I chuckled. “Also true.”
“Yoongi, you’re one of the grumpiest, most pessimistic people I know, and you don’t know any of these?” She placed her hands on her hips, teasing me with that playful spark in her eyes.
That was it. I straightened from the bench, glaring at her. She was provoking me, and God, did I want her.
“Last one, I promise,” she said with a smile. “’Hot glass looks exactly the same as cold glass.’ Learned that one the hard way.”
Our laughter mingled until Jimin cleared his throat behind us. “Can you keep it down? I’m trying to do science here.”
I rolled my eyes at Jimin, then turned back to Y/N, who was smoothing her ponytail, giggles subsiding. Her happiness was infectious, and I got lost in her eyes.
“Y/N,” I said, struggling to keep my voice even, “we should check on that gel.”
“What gel?” she asked, puzzled.
“The gel, Y/N.” I stared at her, hoping she’d understand.
“Oh… right,” she said, her smile turning knowing.
I followed her to the dark room, anticipation thrumming in my veins. Once inside, I switched off the lights, activating the IN USE signal. Y/N took a sharp breath, her excitement palpable.
“Are you trying to drive me mad?” I whispered, reaching for her face in the darkness.
“Maybe,” she whispered back, her breath warm against my skin.
My hands traveled to her neck, fingers sliding under her ponytail to release her hair. “Y/N… this isn’t smart. We could get caught.” I lifted her onto the counter, the cold bench pressing into my back.
“Not smart,” she agreed, her breath hitching against my neck.
“Do you know how hard it is to keep my hands off you when you provoke me?” My hand slipped under her shirt, cupping her breast. She gasped, and I pressed myself closer, making my point clear.
“Oh, it’s hard all right,” she giggled, wrapping her legs around me.
“You drive me insane, Y/N,” I murmured, biting her lip. She moaned softly, fisting my hair. “Please… can I?”
“Oh God, yes… Yoongi, please.”
She didn’t have to ask twice. I lifted her with one hand, fumbling with the buttons of her jeans with the other. In seconds, I was inside her, stifling my moans into her shoulder.
God bless a dark room.
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The weeks drift by in a blur of lab work and secret rendezvous. Y/N is a constant distraction—she teases me, contradicts me, drives me mad, excites me, motivates me, and challenges me all at once. I’ve never felt happier. Having her in my life has transformed my days from monotonous routines into a whirlwind of laughter and unexpected joy. I catch myself cracking jokes that aren’t laced with sarcasm, and I genuinely enjoy explaining new techniques to her, savoring our discussions and her insightful challenges. I never imagined mentoring could be so thrilling—or so fulfilling. Y/N pushes me to be better, to be happier, to have fun.
The lab buzzes with the unspoken tension of our secret. I’m sure everyone suspects something, but we maintain a facade of professionalism. Our attempts to date outside the lab are constantly thwarted by inconvenient encounters with colleagues. It’s frustrating as hell. I don’t care what people think, but the risk of getting into trouble with Jin or Y/N losing her chance to work in the lab keeps us cautious. So, we play the game, keeping up appearances, even though we’ve stolen away to the dark room eight times… not that I’m counting.
As the semester winds down, it becomes harder to heed Yoonji’s advice not to overthink the future. Y/N hopes to land a summer internship in the lab, but I haven’t had the heart to tell her how unlikely that is. Jin has never offered an internship after just one semester. I could vouch for her, but she’s adamant about not wanting special treatment. The thought of her securing an internship elsewhere, leaving for the summer, gnaws at me. The impending separation looms like a dark cloud, promising a long and miserable summer.
Tonight, Jin is hosting the department's end-of-semester party. I sit in my car, ready to drive Y/N there, trying to suppress my annoyance at having to pretend all night. We’re picking up Hoseok and Serena too, a cover to avoid suspicion. Waiting in the car like some kind of creep, I watch the building's entrance.
Then I see her, and all my irritation dissipates. Thank God for May weather—Y/N is wearing a skirt. She smiles at me through the window, and as she gets in, her lips meet mine, her hands finding their way to my neck. I encircle her waist, breathing in deeply, savoring her scent. Even after two months, my need for her is as urgent as ever.
“Hi…” she breathes as she pulls back, her fingers tracing patterns in my hair. I close my eyes, enjoying her touch.
“Hi…” I murmur, resting my forehead against hers. “You’re wearing a skirt.” I groan, my hand sliding down from her waist, over her thigh, and under the soft fabric.
“I am,” she says, her lips brushing my neck. I tease her inner thigh, each stroke inching closer to where I want my fingers to be. “What are you doing?” she whispers in my ear.
“I don’t want to go to this thing.” I nibble her earlobe. “Can we just stay here?” My fingers hover over her panties, but she traps my hand between her thighs.
“No…” she breathes, her voice shaky. “You promised we’d go. Jin invited me personally. Please.”
Her plea makes me relent, and I move back, our foreheads still touching. “But you’re wearing a skirt. You know what that does to me?” I caress her thigh again, unable to resist.
“I have an idea,” she giggles.
“I’m going to be hard and uncomfortable the whole time,” I say, trying to keep my tone light.
“I’ll take care of it afterward,” she promises. I groan again, starting the car.
“Thank you,” she whispers.
As I drive, Y/N fumbles with the radio, displeased with the music.
“Oh, I know!” She reaches for the glove box. “Can we listen to this?” She holds up my mom’s Carpenters CD.
My chest tightens, but I try to smile. I haven’t told her about my parents, and while she knows I moved in with my aunt and uncle as a kid, she hasn’t pried. She’s giving me time, waiting for me to open up.
“Not a chance,” I snap, slipping into our usual banter.
“C’mon, I want to listen to it.”
“Well, I don’t.”
“Why have a Carpenters CD if you don’t like them?”
“Y/N…”
I really don’t want to get into it tonight.
“Just one song, please?” Her eager eyes and smile make it impossible to refuse. I nod, focusing on the road. She opens the case and sees my mom’s note, and my chest tightens again.
“Oh…” she says softly. “You didn’t want me to see this.” She closes the case. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to pry.”
“It’s okay, Y/N. Just put the CD on. It’s fine.”
“No, Yoongi. This obviously has sentimental value. I’m sorry.” Concern etches her features.
“Hey, don’t be upset.” I reach for her face, my thumb brushing her cheek. “Let’s forget it. I’ll tell you about the note another time. Okay?”
“I’m sorry,” she repeats, eyes locked on mine.
“It’s fine.” I smile, pushing thoughts of my parents away. I grab my iPod, knowing exactly what will cheer her up. When The Police starts playing, her smile returns, and all feels right in the world.
I place my hand over hers on her thigh, the sensation of the skirt fabric under our intertwined fingers reminding me of the night ahead.
Oh God, the skirt, the party… this is going to be hell.
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“Hey, Y/N! Ready to mingle with the senior citizens?” Hoseok’s voice cuts through the chatter as he hops into the car and settles behind me.
“So, what’s the plan?” Serena chimes in, sliding into the backseat beside Y/N.
“Can we please keep this low-key? We’re just giving Y/N a ride, nothing more,” I say, trying to keep the irritation from seeping into my tone. Of course, they ignore me.
“Y/N, how about you and I walk in first? The boys can follow behind us,” Serena suggests, leaning forward to prop herself between our seats like a self-appointed traffic cop.
“Or… I could stroll in with Y/N, my arm around her shoulders. You know, start some fun rumors,” Hoseok pipes up, a cheeky grin on his face.
“Ow!” He yelps as Serena gives him a swift elbow to the ribs. “Come on, babe! I was just joking!”
“Seriously, Hoseok. That dog act is getting old,” I mutter, catching Serena’s annoyed glare in the rearview mirror.
“How is this not a big deal?” I groan under my breath.
“How about we all walk in holding hands? All four of us!” Y/N suggests, her eyes sparkling with mischief.
I turn to scowl at her. “You too?” She flashes me a grin, scrunching her nose playfully.
We finally pull up to Jin's house, and as we pile out of the car, I notice Y/N walking ahead, chatting with Serena. I fall back next to Hoseok, a knot of anxiety tightening in my stomach. 
Inside, Y/N glances back at me, then disappears into the crowd. I greet Jin and grab a drink, then find a spot by the back wall. Familiar faces from the lab are scattered around, some with their families. I find myself chatting with a few of them, even playing with a little kid in a sweater that says “Future Scientist.” I snort at the irony—here's hoping he grows up to be an engineer instead.
To my surprise, I’m not hating this night. I lean against the wall, stealing glances at Y/N as she lights up while talking to Prof. Tanner, one of the few female professors in our department. I’ve heard she can be a total nightmare, but she’s all smiles for Y/N. What gives? 
As Y/N mingles, I can’t help but wonder if there’s anyone who wouldn’t be drawn to her charm. Just then, Jungkook appears out of nowhere, planting a quick kiss on her cheek. My heart races, and I shoot up from my chair.
“She’s got it under control,” Serena whispers, her grip firm on my elbow as we watch Y/N step away from Jungkook, saying something before he wanders off. I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding, sinking back down in my seat. Y/N glances my way, her eyes briefly meeting mine before she moves on.
“Yoongi, you need to get it together. You’re staring at her like some creepy stalker,” Serena says, finally releasing my elbow.
I sigh, knowing she’s right. We bicker a lot, but beneath her icy exterior, she really does look out for me.
Hoseok appears, holding another round of drinks, and I begin to feel a little lighter. But when I find Y/N again, she’s deep in conversation with Jin. I can see the passion in her gestures, the way she lights up as she talks about her project. It fills me with pride to see how far she’s come this semester, how confident she is now.
Jin glances at me a couple of times during their conversation. I try to focus on my drink, but the curiosity gnaws at me. Is he proud of her? Does he see what I see?
“Dude, Jimin is giving you a death stare,” Hoseok whispers, snapping me out of my thoughts. I follow his gaze and meet Jimin’s dark brown eyes. He quickly looks away, a slight frown on his face.
I shrug, trying to shake off the feeling of unease. “He has a weird stare. You think he suspects something?”
“Probably,” Hoseok says. “I don’t know how much longer you can keep this charade up. It’s torture.” I rub my chest, where a tightness has been growing since Y/N walked away.
“Jeon can’t take a hint, huh?” Hoseok mutters, and I see Y/N accepting a drink from Jungkook.
Are you kidding me?
My hand tightens into a fist on my thigh as I down the rest of my drink, a wave of frustration crashing over me. Y/N smiles at Jungkook, and while I’m somewhat relieved to see it doesn’t reach her eyes like when she smiles at me, it still makes my blood boil. I want her by my side, to claim her as mine. I want Jungkook to back off.
“Dude, calm down,” Hoseok says, placing a hand on my shoulder. I turn to him, exhaling sharply through my nose.
My night is crumbling, and I feel on the verge of snapping.
“I can’t, okay? I’m going to take a breather.” I stand abruptly, forcing myself not to look for Y/N again. I know if I see her with him, I might lose it and drag her away like some caveman.
“Want me to come with you?” Hoseok asks, his concern evident.
“No, I’m fine,” I reply, but my tone lacks conviction.
I storm into Jin’s sprawling backyard, seeking solace in the shadows. I need to figure out what’s happening inside my head. Why does this pressure in my chest hurt so much? It’s ridiculous—I shouldn’t be feeling like this over someone. I should be rational. 
Sinking onto a bench, I rest my head in my hands. 
God, I’m losing my mind. Or maybe I’m turning into a hypochondriac… or both.
I just want Y/N. I need her. I miss her. I love her.
My head falls back against the bench. 
Is this what love feels like? 
Suddenly, I hear a soft voice. “Hey… what’s wrong?” 
I didn’t even notice Y/N coming outside. I lift my head and lean back, letting out a deep sigh.
“Nothing, I’m fine,” I say, but the anger slips through despite my best efforts.
“Yoongi…” She sits beside me and takes my hand in hers.
“This party sucks!” I snap, but she doesn’t flinch. She never does. Y/N knows me too well, understands my rough edges. I never want to take my frustration out on her.
“What sucks?” Her voice is steady, soothing. How does she do it?
“This stupid party…” I trail off, staring at our hands.
She laughs lightly. “Are you drunk?”
“No! I’m not!” Realizing I raised my voice again, I groan and try to regain my composure. “I want you beside me. I want to tell Jungkook to back off because you’re mine. I want to hold your hand, put my arm around you, keep you warm. I don’t want to hide this anymore.”
“I know…” Y/N reaches for my face, her fingers brushing my hair behind my ear. I lean into her touch, closing my eyes as her words unravel me. “I want to be beside you too,” she whispers, and it feels like the world has shifted. “But right now, it’s not smart for us. The semester is almost over. I’ll find an internship in a different lab, and then we won’t have to hide anymore.”
So I’m screwed either way. If she finds a different lab, we won’t have to keep this secret, but I won’t get to see her every day. And if she stays, we’ll be stuck in this limbo.
“Can we go soon?” I plead, my frustration boiling over. I want to escape this place, take Y/N somewhere safe where I can finally let myself be with her.
“We just got here,” she giggles, trying to lighten the mood. “Stop being so grumpy and let’s get back inside.” She rises, but I grip her hand tightly.
“You know I hate when you call me grumpy.”
“No, you don’t. You love it,” she counters with a bright smile.
I do love it. And I love you.
The words sit heavy on my tongue, burning to be spoken, but I hold them back.
I pulled her gently between my legs, my hand finding its way to her cheek as I brought our lips together. She kissed me back, soft and tentative, but then, with a push against my chest, she pulled away.
I groaned, rising from the bench. “I’ll go in first. You follow in a few minutes, okay?” I needed a moment to gather my thoughts, and the warmth of her fingers lingering on my chest felt like a whisper of reassurance.
“Yeah…” I breathed out, almost a whine.
“And try to have some fun.” She shot me a playful smile that sent a flutter through my chest.
“Yeeees…” I groaned again, turning to walk away.
“You’re being a big baby, you know that, right?” Her teasing tone made me roll my eyes.
“Y/N, don’t provoke me,” I sighed, tugging at the hair on the back of my neck.
“Okay, okay.” She giggled, her laughter lightening the air between us. “I promise to sit by you for a bit.” With that, she let me head inside alone.
I lingered outside for a few more moments, trying to cool off and collect my thoughts before re-entering the fray.
Just as I was about to step back in, Jimin stumbled outside, looking a bit worse for wear. “Yoongi! There you are,” he said, plopping down on the bench next to me.
“Jimin,” I greeted, not really in the mood for small talk.
“So… are you like social now?” he asked, his words slurred from the alcohol he’d consumed.
“What do you mean?” I feigned interest, though I really didn’t care.
“You never used to come to these things,” he pointed out, sounding suspicious, as if I’d committed some sort of crime.
I shrugged and stood up, feeling the urge to escape. “Are you sleeping with your undergrad?” he blurted, trying to whisper but failing miserably.
A glare shot across my face as I realized he suspected something. Jimin was definitely too drunk for this conversation. “Jimin, I think you should stop drinking,” I advised, and when he just stared blankly, I added, “I better get back inside before Hoseok thinks I left without him.” I didn’t wait for his reply as I headed back in.
Y/N was sitting with Hoseok and Serena when I walked over, and the moment she smiled at me, my chest tightened with a mix of longing and pride. I wanted nothing more than to reach out and touch her hand or leg, but I managed to sit back, trying to play it cool. 
I was surprisingly glad I’d come. I’d anticipated a dull evening, but it turned out to be quite enjoyable. Watching Y/N all dolled up, chatting with everyone, filled me with a sense of pride. 
Then, as Jin started playing Nelly, the atmosphere shifted. Seeing Dr. Amun-Kebi, bow tie and all, dancing to “Hot in Here” was an image that would be burned in my memory forever.
Later, Y/N paced nervously through my room in her underwear, her damp hair leaving a faint mist in the air. I watched her, my heart pounding at the sight of her anxious movements as she rummaged through her bag. The tension felt heavy, almost suffocating.
“Y/N, you’re going to do great,” I said, my voice still laced with sleep as I tried to offer her some comfort.
“You don’t know that,” she replied tightly, finally finding what she was looking for. 
“You know this stuff better than anyone else in that room,” I said, propping myself up on my elbows to catch her gaze.
“That’s not true. You’ll be there too.” She faced me, comb in hand, her worry evident as she began to untangle her wet hair.
“Exactly! So, you’ve got nothing to worry about.” I flashed her a reassuring smile, but it felt weak against her rising anxiety.
“I stutter when I’m nervous,” she admitted, her voice wavering as she pulled out her clothes and bent over, her vulnerability stark against the backdrop of my cluttered room.
“Then try to relax,” I said, taking a deep breath. “You’ve put in so much work, and you know your project inside and out. You’ll do amazing, Y/N.”
“What if Jin asks me something I don’t know?” Panic danced in her eyes as she placed her hands on her hips.
“You don’t have to know everything. I’ll be there too—this is my project too. Remember, it’s not a test. The point is to discuss the results together, nothing more.”
Slowly, her frown faded, replaced by a tentative grin. She climbed back onto the bed, straddling me, her wet hair dripping onto my shoulder. The scent of her filled the air, intoxicating, as she leaned in to kiss me softly.
I lay back, tracing the strap of her bra with my finger. “I know how to get you to relax,” I teased.
“Not a chance, Grumpy. We’d be late,” she shot back, rubbing against me just enough to send a bolt of desire through my body.
“Y/N, you’re such a tease,” I groaned, dropping my head back in exasperation.
“And you have a foul mouth, Min,” she replied, disappearing into the bathroom, her voice echoing playfully.
“Which, coincidentally, you love,” I called after her.
She poked her head out, toothbrush in her mouth. “That… I do.”
With a lazy stretch, I got up from the bed, dragging my feet toward the bathroom. She stood by the sink, brushing her teeth in her adorable smiley-face underwear, making me ache with need. “You’re going to pay for my blue balls tonight,” I murmured into her neck, eliciting a giggle as my stubble brushed against her soft skin. 
She bent over to rinse her mouth, pressing her behind into the growing bulge in my boxers, causing a deep groan to escape my lips. I playfully smacked her ass as she squealed, darting out of the bathroom.
“Don’t take forever, Grumpy. I want to be early to set things up!”
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Y/N and I stood in the seminar room, preparing everything for the presentation. The space was cozy, just big enough for the nine of us in our group, including Jin. After confirming that all the slides displayed correctly, I shot Y/N an encouraging smile and took a seat toward the back, keeping a close eye on her.
I could see the nerves bubbling beneath her composed exterior. We had gone over every detail last night, and I knew she was ready for this moment.
Jin kicked things off with some lab business, and then it was Y/N’s turn to shine. As she started her talk, she stumbled over her words just once at the beginning, but quickly found her rhythm, her confidence blossoming with every passing second. My heart swelled with pride as I watched her speak; she was absolutely incredible.
Jin seemed impressed too, prompting her to elaborate on a few points, which she handled flawlessly. But then Jimin jumped in with questions that felt a bit off-base, probing into unrelated techniques and approaches. Y/N stumbled over a couple of his inquiries, but she made educated guesses, maintaining her poise. Still, I could feel my irritation rising. What the hell was Jimin’s problem?
“That was all nice… uh… Y/N?” Jimin hesitated, clearly relishing the moment as he mispronounced her name. My blood boiled at his deliberate slight. 
“I just don’t see the point.”
“The p-point?” Y/N stuttered again, and it took everything in me to keep my temper in check. I wanted to tear Jimin apart for being such a jerk.
“Yeah, I mean… so you found two new toxin genes. How is that going to help anything?” Jimin shrugged dismissively, and I could feel my frustration reaching a boiling point.
Before Y/N could respond, I jumped in, my voice sharper than I intended. “Oh, I’m sorry, Jimin. Are you questioning the impact of my research?”
Jimin turned to face me, a smug expression creeping across his face.
“Yoongi…” Jin’s warning gaze made it clear I needed to rein it in.
“No, seriously. Please, tell me if you are,” I shot back, my eyes locking onto Jimin's, daring him to continue.
“Actually,” Y/N interjected softly from the front of the room, pulling our attention back to her. “I think I might be able to answer that question.” She glanced at me for permission, and I nodded, stepping back to let her take the spotlight.
“Please, go ahead,” Jin encouraged her, his tone supportive.
“Well… if these two toxins are, as we’ve shown, involved in the cancerous growth of stomach epithelium cells, then studying their protein structure and interaction will provide insight into the anomalous stomach pathology caused by H. pylori… and its possible cure.”
I couldn’t have put it better myself. My heart swelled with pride and something deeper. Marry me?
“Marvelous!” Jin exclaimed, while Jimin huffed, sinking into his chair in defeat. My annoyance at Jimin evaporated, replaced by overwhelming joy. I couldn’t take my eyes off Y/N as she smiled, tucking her hair behind her ears. I wanted to run to her, scoop her up in my arms, and kiss her senseless, but I managed to stay seated, a wide grin plastered on my face.
As the room emptied, I lingered behind with Y/N, pretending to help pack up the projector and laptop. It was just an excuse to stay close to her, to contain the waves of emotions crashing inside me. Jin congratulated her one last time before leaving, and I counted his steps, waiting until he was far enough away. My heart raced, and when I could wait no longer, I dropped everything and rushed to Y/N, cupping her face in my hands and kissing her desperately.
“You did amazing!” I said, my voice breathless with excitement.
“I was so nervous!” she admitted, her eyes wide.
“I know, but you nailed it!” I kissed her again, unable to get enough of her.
Still holding her face, I searched her eyes. “Geez, Y/N… you’re incredible. I—” I leaned closer, resting my hands on the table behind her, my lips trying to convey everything words couldn’t. It was more than just her success or my pride as a scientist; it was so much deeper than that.
“I want to cook you dinner tonight,” I said, pulling her into a tight embrace.
She smiled up at me. “You do?”
“Yes. We’re having a celebration date at my place.”
“Okay.”
“Okay.” I kissed the top of her head, reluctantly letting her go as we gathered our things to head back to the lab. My heart was full, my mind racing with excitement and a twinge of fear. I’d never been happier in my life.
Now the only question was: what on earth was I going to cook for Y/N?
We returned to the lab, the earlier tension between Y/N and me fading as we wrapped up our tasks. Her eyes sparkled with determination as she headed off for her final exam, and we agreed to meet at my apartment for dinner later. Just as I was about to slip out early to prepare, an email notification pinged in my inbox.
From: Seokjin Kim, seokjinkim(at)fhcrc(.)org   Sent: Friday, May 13, 2024, 4:27 PM   To: Yoongi Min, ygmin(at)u(.)washington(.)edu  
Yoongi,
We need to talk about your undergrad. Please stop by my office.
Jin
-
Dr. Seokjin Kim   Member, Division of Basic Sciences   Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center   1100 Fairview Avenue North   Seattle, WA 98109-1024  
Shit. A cold sweat broke out on my forehead. Jin had never summoned me to his office like this before. He usually came down to the lab if he wanted to talk. The email's terse tone sent a chill racing down my spine. There was only one reason he’d call me in like this—he knew about Y/N and me. 
That jerk, Jimin, must have said something. 
No point speculating now; I had to face Jin. My heart raced as I imagined the worst. He’d tell me Y/N and I couldn’t be together, that she wouldn’t be able to work in the lab anymore. The thought twisted my gut with regret. I should have been more careful, kept my feelings in check.
Shit.
I knocked on Jin’s door and stepped inside. He was facing his computer, barely glancing at me as I sank into the chair across from him. 
“Hello, Yoongi. Take a seat,” he said, his voice calm but layered with an undercurrent I couldn’t quite place. “Let me just finish this email.”
I watched him type, the sound of the keys echoing like a death knell. Finally, he turned, a smile dancing on his lips that didn’t quite reach his eyes. I nodded, trying to mask my nerves, my hands gripping the chair arms.
“I have to say, I was very impressed with Y/N’s seminar. She showed a broad knowledge of the project, answered questions confidently, and gathered an impressive amount of data for just one semester.”
“She is incredible,” I blurted out before I could stop myself.
Nice, Yoongi. Way to keep it cool.
Jin raised an eyebrow, nodding. “She does seem very mature, dedicated, and hardworking.”
“She is.” I couldn’t help but think of all the moments we’d shared, both in the lab and out.
“So, I called you in here for two things. First, I want to offer Y/N a position as a summer intern. What do you think?” 
My heart leaped. Jin had never offered an undergrad a position after just one semester. This was amazing! Y/N was going to be thrilled. 
“That’s… um… that’s great! She completely deserves it, and it would be an incredible opportunity for her. She wants to apply to grad school next fall, so summer research would be really beneficial.”
“I see… so you approve?” Jin asked, tilting his head.
The way he looked at me made my blood run cold. He didn’t need my approval. Something was off.
“O-of course,” I stammered, my instincts telling me there was more to this conversation.
“Well, that leads to the second thing I wanted to discuss.” He shifted in his chair, crossing his legs as if he were settling in for a serious talk. 
Here we go…
“It seems you have a very close relationship with Y/N. You seem very… protective of her.”
I knew it! Jimin must have spilled the beans. My fists clenched at the thought.
“Now, I understand it’s in your nature—her being under your care and all—to be protective. But there’s something else,” Jin continued, tapping his finger against his lips thoughtfully. “I’ve noticed the change she’s brought about in you. It’s fascinating.”
Geez… Jin and his fascination.
Before I could respond, he went on. “Of course, I would never ask if there’s something unprofessional going on because that would be tactless. However, you should know that involving yourself in a romantic relationship with an undergrad—especially if she’ll be getting paid for the summer—is completely unacceptable.”
Fucking shit.
My hands gripped the chair so tightly that my knuckles turned white. I couldn’t do this. Hiding my feelings for Y/N felt impossible, but I’d have to—for her sake. This was an incredible opportunity. We’d have to keep it up until she graduated. Damn, that was a whole year! Maybe I could graduate sooner, find a job in another lab…
Jin was staring at me, eyebrows raised, when suddenly he burst out laughing, the sound echoing in the small office.
“I’m just messing with you, kid.” He slapped his thighs as his laughter subsided. “Your personal life outside this lab is none of my business. As long as it doesn’t affect your work or hers, I have no problem with it.”
I stared at him, dumbfounded. Did he just say what I thought he said?
“You know, when I met Mrs. Kim, she was a post-doc in this lab.”
“I didn’t know that…” I exhaled, the tension draining from my body.
“Well, now that this is settled, I’ll offer Y/N the position.”
“O-okay.”
Still in shock, I left Jin’s office. Before I even reached the lab, my phone rang—Y/N, squealing about Jin’s offer. I didn’t mention my conversation with him; I’d save that for tonight during our celebration dinner.
Our celebration dinner… Oh God. What was I thinking? I couldn’t cook!
I definitely needed to stop at the grocery store unless I wanted to serve Y/N mac and cheese for dinner. Sighing, I realized I had no idea what to prepare. Time to turn to my all-knowing best friend: Google.
Search: What to cook for your girlfriend? Search Results: 5 Easy Meals To Cook For Her – AskMen.com
AskMen.com? Seriously? 
Chipotle Shrimp Kabobs…
What the actual fuck?
Sautéed Lemon Garlic Chicken…
Really, AskMen? Really? 
I groaned, frustration bubbling up. This was not going well. Maybe I should try again.
Search: Easy dinner for two Search Results: Cooking for Two Recipes – Allrecipes.com
Allrecipes.com? I think I’ve heard Yoonji mention this site before. 
Salmon with Raspberry Ginger Glaze…
Holy shit! And these are the easy ones?
I slammed my forehead against the desk repeatedly. Okay, maybe I should stick to something I already knew how to make… like grilled cheese. Or pasta! I could whip up some pasta sauce.
Search: Easy Pasta Sauce Search Results: Easy Vodka Sauce – Allrecipes.com
Now we’re talking. 
I jotted down all the ingredients and headed to the store, feeling a flicker of hope.
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I was chopping onions into tiny squares when my phone buzzed with a text from Y/N.
Undergrad: I’m done with the semester! Woot! Woot! Do you want me to come early to help with dinner?
Yes… please… no!
C’mon, I can handle this. How hard could it be? Just follow the protocol, Min.
Me: What? No faith in me, Y/L/N?
I typed quickly, trying not to let the onion juice splatter all over my cell. 
Shit…
Undergrad: I would prefer not to get food poisoning. I have an internship this summer! :)”
I couldn’t help but smile at the screen.
Me: You’re distracting me. See you here at 7. P.S. Smiley faces are lame.”
Undergrad: And you, my Grumpy, are adorable!
I chuckled, my heart racing with excitement. Maybe I could do this after all. Just as long as I didn’t burn the kitchen down.
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When Y/N knocked at the door, it was only a quarter to seven. I had the garlic bread in the oven, and the sauce still needed another thirty minutes to simmer. I’d hoped to squeeze in a quick shower before she arrived, but clearly, that plan was a bust.
I opened the door to find Y/N standing there, a bright smile lighting up her face. “Did you wrestle the tomatoes?” she giggled, tiptoeing in for a quick kiss. “Hi…”
I wanted nothing more than to pull her close, but I was covered in tomato juice and splatters from head to toe. “Give me a sec,” I said, retreating to my bedroom to change.
When I returned, she was by the sink, eyes wide as she surveyed the chaos I’d created. “Geez, Yoongi. How many things are you making?” She gestured dramatically to the pile of pots and utensils stacked high.
“Just the one dish, Y/N,” I replied, trying to sound casual while stirring the bubbling sauce.
“Did you feel the need to use every pot in the kitchen? Were you trying them all out?” She raised an eyebrow, a teasing smile on her lips.
“Okay, Y/L/N. You’re getting on my nerves. I’m trying to cook here.” I continued mixing, trying to ignore her playful jabs.
“You should use a wooden spoon,” she advised, inching closer with a wooden spoon in hand. “The metal one makes the sauce acidic. The metal reacts with the pH of the tomatoes—”
I shot her a glare. “I didn’t even know I owned a wooden spoon,” I grumbled, taking it from her. “I almost have a PhD, you know.”
“Okay… okay… Mr. PhD.” She waved her hands in mock surrender. “Can I play some music?” She reached for my laptop on the counter and gasped, laughter bubbling out. “Oh my gosh… you googled the meaning of sautéed?”
“Okay, that’s it, Y/L/N.” I pretended to drop the wooden spoon over the counter dramatically. “No dinner for you.” I pointed a finger at her, struggling to keep a straight face.
“I’m sorry!” she laughed, and I stepped closer, cornering her against the counter. “It does smell delicious,” she whispered, running a finger down my chest.
“And I haven’t even showered yet.” I dropped kisses along her neck, my hand sliding beneath the hem of her shirt.
“You do smell delicious too,” she said in a husky whisper.
“Liar. I stink of onions.”
“Only a little bit.” She giggled into my neck as I lifted her up onto the counter. “Thanks for making me dinner.”
“My pleasure,” I murmured, nuzzling her neck. She smelled amazing—like warmth and sunshine. I pulled back to look into her eyes. “Congratulations on your internship, Y/N. You absolutely earned it.”
“Yeah… about that,” she said, a nervous giggle escaping her lips. “I haven’t said yes yet.”
“Why not?” I asked, confusion painting my features.
“Well, I have to think about it.”
“Y/N, it’s an incredible opportunity. Jin has never offered an internship to a student after only one semester of work.”
“I know… but…” She bit her lip, trailing off.
“What is it?” I cupped her cheek with my hand, rubbing my thumb along her skin.
“Well… are we going to be okay if I join the lab for the summer? We’ll have to keep hiding this, and I know it’s been getting… um… difficult… for both of us.”
I sighed in relief, a smile creeping onto my face. It was sweet of her to include herself, especially when I’d been the one making everything complicated. The thought of her giving up this chance for us made my heart swell. “Yeah… about that…” I echoed her earlier words. She looked at me expectantly. “I’m sorry I’ve been so difficult about the whole thing… but it turns out, we don’t need to hide anymore. I mean, we should still keep things professional in the lab and all, but… Jin sort of knows.”
“WHAT?” She pushed me back with a hand on my chest, her eyes wide.
“I think it was becoming obvious, Y/N. He didn’t ask me directly, but he said our personal life had nothing to do with our work. As long as it didn’t affect our performance, he didn’t care.”
“He doesn’t care?” Her voice was still high-pitched with surprise.
“Apparently, his wife worked for him once too…” I shrugged, returning my attention to dinner. I stirred the sauce and tossed a pinch of salt into the boiling water before adding the spaghetti.
“That… that changes things,” she said slowly, her brow furrowed.
I stepped back between her legs, looking into her eyes. “What is it?”
“So, um… do you want me to take the internship? You won’t get tired of me?”
“What kind of question is that, Y/N?” I shook my head, feeling a pang in my chest. “I’ve been aching, physically hurting, thinking about you taking an internship somewhere else and leaving me for the whole summer.”
Her smile was radiant, brightening the dim kitchen. “You have?”
“Yes…”
“Well, it looks like I won’t be going anywhere,” she declared.
“Good. Because I have a lot of work to do, and I could really use an overachieving undergrad with some pretty amazing skills at the bench.”
“I’d say my skills go beyond the bench. Wouldn’t you agree?” she asked, a teasing smirk playing on her lips.
“I would…” I pointed the wooden spoon at her playfully. “But don’t distract me now, or I’ll burn your dinner.”
Dinner turned out surprisingly well. We ate as she excitedly recounted her classes, finals, classmates, and professors. I sat back, just soaking in the sight of her—how her eyes lit up when she spoke, how her mouth curved into a smile, the way her eyebrows danced with every emotion. Watching her enjoy life, so passionate and full of energy, felt like a precious gift I never wanted to take for granted.
Y/N was drying the last few dishes, the rhythmic swish of the towel against porcelain filling the quiet kitchen with a comforting cadence. I approached her from behind, the warmth of her body radiating toward me as I leaned in to kiss her neck. The familiar flutter of anticipation twisted in my stomach. “You want to show off some of those non-bench skills of yours?”
She turned to me, a playful smile on her lips. As I leaned on the counter, I caught a whiff of my own odor wafting up. “God, I stink…”
Her laughter bubbled up, light and teasing. “It’s fine.”
“Do you mind if I take a quick shower?” I asked, a hopeful lilt creeping into my voice.
“Can I join you?” 
A grin broke across my face, and I took her hand, leading us toward the bathroom. The air between us crackled with a tension that felt electric, urging me to shed my shirt and pants before we even reached the shower.
She kicked off her shoes, her fingers deftly unbuttoning her jeans while I turned the water on, steam swirling like ethereal ghosts in the dim light. “May I?” I asked, wrapping my fingers around her wrist. She nodded, her eyes shimmering with mischief.
With practiced ease, I unbuttoned her jeans, sliding them down to her ankles. As I knelt to kiss her calves, then her knees, and finally her thighs, her giggles rang out like music, lifting the weight of the world off my shoulders. “Your scruff tickles,” she said, her voice bright and breathy.
I lifted her shirt over her head, tracing my fingers along the delicate straps of her bra. Once our underwear was discarded like forgotten memories, I pulled her close, feeling her warmth envelop me as her legs wrapped around my waist. Our differing heights made this an all-too-familiar arrangement, a perfect fit for everything we were about to share.
She squealed as I jumped into the shower, icy water hitting us both and sending shockwaves of heat through my body. Her lips found mine, soft and insistent, and I pressed her back against the cool tiles, the world outside fading away.
“Put me down,” she murmured hoarsely into my ear.
I obliged, feeling the rush of her kisses trailing down my chest as she sank to her knees, a wicked smile playing on her lips. 
“Y/N…” I breathed, leaning against the slick wall for support, knowing what was coming. This was one of her non-bench skills—a skill I’d come to appreciate in ways I couldn’t quite articulate. The water cascaded over us, hot and cold, our bodies entwined in a dance as old as time.
She began slowly, teasing, her hands wrapping around me, her tongue swirling around my tip, and I groaned, the sound swallowed by the rushing water. My instincts told me to hold back, but the pleasure was too sweet, too intoxicating. 
“Y/N…” I rasped, the words spilling out like a confession, “I’m… shit…”
But she didn’t relent. No, she tightened her grip and quickened her pace, and as my knees weakened beneath me, I surrendered to the waves of ecstasy crashing over me. I grabbed at the shower curtain rod, but it shook under my weight. I couldn’t hold on anymore.
With a final, desperate groan, I let go, surrendering to the moment, the pleasure consuming me entirely. She rose from her knees, licking her lips, that look in her eyes making my heart race. “You are one talented woman,” I murmured against her neck, panting.
Still wrapped around me, I stumbled into the bedroom, a tangle of limbs and laughter. I collapsed onto the bed, her body beneath me, and kissed her everywhere, exploring the soft curves that felt like home.
I knelt beside the bed, pulling her legs over my shoulders, my hands wandering over her hips as I feasted on the sweetness before me. The taste of her was electric, sending jolts of desire straight to my core. 
“God, Y/N, you taste even better than you smell,” I groaned, losing myself in her as she writhed beneath my touch, her moans filling the air like a siren’s song. 
It was then that I realized bringing her pleasure was no longer just a thrill; it was my favorite pastime, a dance of intimacy that bound us closer than any words could express. I placed soft kisses along her body, the world outside fading into obscurity, leaving only us—lost in our own private paradise. 
“Mmmmmm… Yoongi…” she sighed, fingers tangling in my hair. “Very… talented… yourself.”
I chuckled, planting another kiss on her lips, affection bubbling up like a tide. I love you, I love you, I love you…
“Inside… now,” she commanded, breathless and eager.
“Yes, ma’am,” I grinned, knowing this night would linger in our memories long after the water had dried.
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“Y/N?” I gently comb my fingers through her damp hair, the strands clinging to my chest like the remnants of a storm.
“Hmm?” Her voice is soft, almost dreamy, as if she’s still wrapped up in the warmth of the moment.
“I… I want to tell you about my parents.” As I speak, she lifts her head, folding her arms over my chest, resting her chin there like it’s a pillow—a sanctuary amid the chaos of my memories.
A tiny grin dances on her lips, and she nods, encouraging me to continue.
“You probably guessed that they’re dead, right?”
She nods again, her gaze steady. “I know they’re not part of your life now… I figured something must have happened.”
“My dad died when I was four,” I say, the words tumbling out bluntly, like the beginning of a ghost story. 
“I’m sorry…” Her voice is small, fragile.
“I don’t remember him, except for pictures.” I shrug, trying to shake off the weight of the past. “He had pretty aggressive colon cancer—killed him in two months.”
“Oh my God, Yoongi… I’m so sorry.”
“It’s fine.” I attempt a smile, but it probably comes out crooked and imperfect, like an old photograph faded by time. “So it was just my mom and me for a while… but when I was eleven, she was diagnosed with breast cancer.”
Her eyes widen, a shadow of understanding crossing her face as she starts rubbing gentle circles on my chest with her fingers, an attempt to soothe the pain I’m dredging up.
“She was so strong, though. She fought it for almost two years, with the most eager and positive attitude you can imagine. Kind of like you, in a way.” I flash her another smile, hoping to lighten the moment, but Y/N’s eyes glisten with unshed tears, and she remains silent, letting me spill my heart.
“When she started getting worse, we moved in with my aunt, uncle, and Yoonji. My dad’s brother, Namjoon, is one of the best oncologists on the West Coast. But after metastasis, there was pretty much nothing else he could do.” 
“And that’s why you do cancer research,” she says, piecing it all together.
“It was Namjoon’s idea, really. He talked about how frustrating it was, being an oncologist, waiting for new therapies, new drugs, and discoveries. I figured it made sense to devote my life to that.”
“It does…” she replies, her tone soft but firm, a steady anchor in my turbulent sea of memories.
“I know it’s not a very profitable career…” I pause, the weight of Estelle’s words echoing in my mind, the sting of her judgment lingering like a bad dream—wasting my time.
“Profitable?” Her disbelief catches me off guard, pulling me from my thoughts. “What do you need so much money for anyway? You’re doing something you love. Something meaningful. That’s so much more important.”
Y/N renders me speechless with her insight, her understanding washing over me like a wave, leaving me breathless. I kiss the top of her head, the moment stretching between us until I decide to share the last piece of my story, the promise I made her before.
“My mom… um… she loved The Carpenters. She would make me sing their songs to her all the time. At the end—when she was breathing through a tube and couldn’t speak anymore—she wrote that note you saw on the CD.”
“‘I’ll be with Daddy soon’?” Y/N remembers, her voice barely a whisper, the words hanging heavy in the air.
“Yes…” I run a hand through my hair, staring at the ceiling as if the white paint might offer me some solace. I try to breathe through the lump in my throat. “I still miss her… so much.” I keep my eyes fixed on the ceiling, willing them not to fill with tears, blaming the onions and their cruel sulfenic acids when they finally betray me.
After a few deep breaths, I turn to face Y/N, who is sniffling, her hands trembling slightly.
“Y/N, don’t cry. Please.”
“I’m sorry. It’s just so sad. I’m so sorry.” She cries over my chest, and I run my hand over her hair, creating a soothing rhythm in the storm of emotions.
“I know. But I’m okay. I’m happy now.”
“You are?”
“Yes, because of you.”
Her sniffles dissolve into giggles, a beautiful mix of laughter and tears, and she never ceases to amaze me with her resilience.
“I love you, Y/N.” The words burn in my throat, raw and true, echoing in the empty spaces of my heart.
She lifts her head, staring at me through her wet eyelashes, and I know she can feel how my heart pounds beneath her. I’m overwhelmed by emotions, but I’ve never spoken truer words. After a moment, Y/N’s hand reaches behind my neck, and her lips collide with mine in a passionate kiss, her tears mingling with mine.
“And I love you…” she breathes in between kisses, her voice trembling with sincerity. “So… so… so much.”
We fall asleep like that, her warm body over my chest, the world fading away. I feel a profound relief, a weight lifting as she gets to know me in ways no one ever has. And even though shadows of uncertainty linger about our future, I realize I don’t have to solve everything right now. Like Y/N said, I would savor my time—my time with her, my time in school. As long as she was by my side, nothing else mattered. I was doing what I loved, and the person I loved was right there with me. It couldn’t possibly get any better than this.
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