#pain of multishipping when in one of them it sometimes feels like they don't even like connor

[areyoualive]

i do think it’s interesting that in circles where connor isn’t as popular, he gets left out of the “androids were forced to do things” narrative simply because of what he was forced to do. it still wasn’t his choice

[chaoticdelinqueerwithglitter]

Let me tell you now, you're the lucky one

(Enemies to Enemies Who Fuck)

(HaruKaku in Bonten timeline)

(some past-MuSan and past-KakuIza with a subtle RanOmi bc why not, it's my fic and I don't have self-restrain when it comes to multishipping)

(link to ao3 in case some one preferes to read it there)

Warnings: Dead Dove: Do Not Eat!

All of them. Bonten is their own warning. Substance abuse. Really unhealthy coping mechanisms. Depression. Mental health problems. Suicide. Major character death. (it's Bonten, they all want to kill themselves and some of them succeed, okay?) Mentions of unsafe sex, but there is no smut or graphic depiction of it.

I tried to not be too graphic with any of this topics, the focus is mostly on what the characters are thinking/feeling. But it's hard anyway, tbh the last scene was actually difficult and painful for me to write. So please, don't take the CW lightly and prioritize your mental health!

Angst and Hurt/No Comfort.

MANGA SPOILERS!!!!

Notes: HaruKaku came as an hilarious idea. Because they are hilarious, let's be real. Soulmates archnemesis, doomed to hate each other in every timeline. But then Bonten happened and of course, I ended up writing some angsty shit instead of focusing in all the other moments when they are hilarious. Kudos for me, yey! 🥲

This is canon complicit (again, is Bonten, beware!)

It alternates from Kakucho's POV to Sanzu's POV. I did that thing again of using "Haruchiyo" when he's in his most vulnerable state because for some reason I like playing with his name like this.

(English is not my first language, be nice please 🙈)

(the art is from @just-sp-in-inginthevoid who is in part responsible for the archnemesis brain riot, but mostly the hilarious part, tbh)

Is not that Kakucho enjoys Sanzu's company. Or that the pinkette gradually started to grow on him. Quite the opposite, to be honest. He hates him a little bit more every day, every shared mission, every time they had to spent hours together.

But with Sanzu, he feels. He feels intensely, he feels with passion. Even if it's twisted, at least he's not empty anymore. The void that threatens to devour him seems to disappear when he's around the other man. Sometimes, Kakucho wants to murder him, but he knows he can't. Others, he wonders what would happen to him if he also loses the only person that it's still able to provoke an intense emotion on him.

Hate is better than apathy, isn't it?

They hate each other passionately. Sanzu finds his reactions too funny for stopping it, always willing to go a little further, to push Kakucho to the edge. It's too easy to pick on him, making him forget about his allegedly righteous patience.

It's disgusting, how Kakucho thinks of himself like he was better than the rest of them. So Sanzu enjoys to proves him wrong, to show him that they are the same (even if he can't stand that fact either, seeing that burning rage in those heterochromatic eyes makes it worth it).

Now that he thinks about it, it was probably a matter of time, considering that his king denied them the right to kill each other, they needed to find a way of releasing all that build up anger. That's probably why isn't that surprising when it finally happens.

It looked like a regular night. Sanzu was high as a kite, trying to forget every one of his lives. Kakucho just seemed to be there, he can't recall exactly why, some type of report, but he didn't pay any attention to it at the moment, too intoxicated for actually caring for something that could wait until tomorrow.

“Why are you still here? You like me that much or what?”

The pinkette man says, slurring his words.

“Are you that high? You know I hate you.”

Is the harsh answer that he earns. It's brutal, but real. Kakucho's honesty has something that grounds him to the present. It's sickening. It's exactly what he wants right now.

“I hate you too, don't worry.” He laughs, finding his own words amusing. “Think about it, me and you. Just us, hating each other all night long.”

“You're crazy.”

“And you didn't say no.”

(If he was more honest with himself, he would admit that he was trying to find another way of punishing his broken mind and his body. But he's not.)

And oh, it actually feels good. Kakucho fucks him with the same brutality that talks to him. He couldn't bear any type of gentle touch (specially not from someone that it's so linked to Mucho, but he isn't thinking in that, he promised himself to forget his old captain a long time ago).

There isn't any type of care between them, only spite. Both men are too broken for having the ability to love someone again. Indeed, this was precisely what he needed. This is perfect.

The next day, Kakucho feels nauseated. How couldn't he? Sanzu was high as fuck, too intoxicated to give proper consent to do anything. So even if he was also a little drunk, even if it wasn't his idea, Kakucho feels guilty for what happened.

Until Sanzu just laughs at his poorly attempt of apologizing, mocking his morals once more. He was about to punch him in the face, but the lingering guilt doesn't allow him to do it. Not that one more bruise would make a difference, actually.

Both are covered in so many marks that more than sex, it looks like they tried to kill each other. Yeah, maybe he should stop feeling sorry for Sanzu, considering this. Maybe that was the best way to get rid of that not-so-pent-up hate.

And it works. At least for a while, it works. Until it happens again. And again.

Is not that they are lovers (Kakucho wants to puke with that idea). They just fuck from time to time. That's all. They hate each other, they wish they could kill the other. But they can't. So, sometimes, they fuck.

Their relationship is not pretty. At all. Or better. If Kakucho had to use only one word for describing it, he would say “real”. They don't lie to each other, what would be the point? Both are too able of seeing between the lies, they are too similar in so many ways. But that raw honesty only makes it worse.

Kakucho knows it's a mistake, that he shouldn't care about Sanzu's fate (he brought it on himself and he doesn't seem to have any complains). But Mikey is worse every day, the king is falling and his loyal dog is falling with him. Kakucho needs to do something, because the uneasiness he feels every time he sees them is now living rent-free in his mind.

That's why, one day, Kakucho tries. He's trying to find his clothes, dressing quickly, wanting to get out of this room that only makes him feel sick. Then, he looks at Sanzu, his pink hair scattered on the pillows, a lazy and satisfied smile than only appears after sex (and never lasts). There is some twisted vulnerability in how content the other man is while lighting up a joint, as if seeing these new swelling (all this pain) on his skin was something he wanted.

(Kakucho can't shake the feeling that Sanzu is using him as another way of hurting himself and that infuriates him so fucking much... Maybe that's the real reason why he decides against his best judgment and opens his big mouth.)

“Is not worth it.”

“Uh?”

Sanzu looks at the other, not sure if he actually heard something. He just wants to smoke and relax, to feel the post-orgasmic satisfaction while it lasts, to enjoy the pain in his body (one more of his little punishments).

“I said is not worth it. Dying with Mikey.”

If it had been anyone else, Sanzu would shoot him in the face just for saying this. Thinking like that, talking like that about his king is treason. It should be. But it's difficult to pretend Kakucho's isn't right about this when, unfortunately, it's the only one Sanzu trusts with Mikey's well-being (It's the one he calls every time Mikey is being suicidal again).

“You wish you could be me, you wish you had died with Izana.”

Sanzu spits his words, burning with all the rage he feels every time he has to acknowledge the reality of how is Mikey.

“That's not what this is about-”

Kakucho is unable to finish his sentence, turning pale in anger when Sanzu cuts him. 'Good'.

“You're a selfish bastard, aren't you? You want me to be like you, stuck here with no purpose, jerking yourself with the memory of a ghost. Pretend it's because of your high morals, that you're worried about me or some other bullshit. But you're just another selfish bastard. And you envy me.”

If it had been anyone else, Sanzu would shoot him in the face. But he can't (he wants to, oh, he wants it so much, but he can't disobey Mikey's orders). So, instead of bullets, he uses his words.

“At least Izana cared about me.”

Is the last thing he hears before Kakucho slams the door. Sanzu laughs maniacally, throwing the first shit he can find to the place the other man was a few seconds a go. He's momentary satisfaction long forgotten, replaced only by hate (and pain, but one that he refuses to see).

The worst part is that in a sickening way, he trusts Kakucho. They don't lie to each other, that makes it so much worse, because both of them know that what the other said is true. He hates him, he hates him with every fiber of his body. He doesn't want this words to be true, he can't accept that. He needs to keep living in this denial, to pretend Mikey is fine (to pretend he doesn't keep mixing this Mikey with that in his nightmares, to pretend they don't look so alike).

It's been three days. Three whole days since Mikey's death was splattered on the news (no one seems to care about Takemichi's death, even with all that footage of how the hero tried to save the most dangerous man in Japan). Kakucho cares, but he knows damn well that he wouldn't be welcomed within the hero's friends, so he would have to say goodbye in his own way (again).

During this days, Kakucho learned some things, like the fact that apparently everyone had some kind of contingency plan in case this happened (no, for when this happened, all of them could see that Mikey was more on the edge every day). But nobody spoke to him about it, keeping him in the darkness, the only idiot that didn't prepare himself for the end. Well, not the only, he knows that, of course he knows that.

(Sanzu would have killed them in the blink of an eye. Anyone who dared to imply that Bonten needed to be prepared to function without a king.)

Kakucho understands the need for secrets, of course he does. The idea of Mikey falling would be considered treason a few days ago, it was taboo to think like that. At the same time, none of them wanted to acknowledge it, like saying it out loud would make it more real. He can't even be mad when the Haitanis (obviously) thought about him on their own schemes, making sure Kakucho was also safe. Or as safe as any of them could be now that Bonten was crumbleling.

It's been three days. Bonten is crumbleling. Mikey is dead. And Sanzu disappeared the same day. Everyone knows he's dead, but they don't say it. Not in front of Takeomi, who's still desperately looking, going out in the rain for hours. Trying to find something, some clue that leads him to his little brother. Clinging to the hope that he's still alive somewhere. That he's going to find him, high as fuck, but alive (Kakucho thinks being able to find Sanzu's body at all would already be a miracle).

Only Ran is able to convince Takeomi to rest a little bit, promising that he and Rindou will help with the search as long as the older man gets a few hours of sleep. Takeomi just nods, mumbling “Today is his birthday, Ran. Is his fucking birthday and he's out there alone.�� while Ran drags him softly, a concerned look plastered in those violet eyes.

Kakucho hates it, hates having to see all this sorrow around him (again). He doesn't lament the loss of Mikey and Sanzu, he's incapable of doing it. Grief took his heart for hostage a long time ago, there is nothing more for him to mourn.

More than anything, Kakucho hates himself, because he's jealous of Sanzu. He knows he shouldn't, but he hates that the pinkette man was right about him. He envies Sanzu, who had the privilege of dying with Mikey, of dying with his king.

Kakucho hates the Mad Dog even more right now. But he's aware that once this hate fades away, he would feel empty again. So he clings onto this feeling, he needs this rage as a motor to keep moving.

It doesn't matter if this energy is fulled with rage, he needs it. He can't fail his friends, what's left of his family. Kakucho has to keep living even if he can't remember how being alive felt anymore. Even if he's more dead inside every day.

So, over and over... Kakucho would keep living.

The rain keeps pouring down without truce, Haruchiyo shrinks inside the leather jacket that was always too big for him. Now the only thing that makes him feel protected from that annoying rain (from the world). To be honest, he isn't completely aware how he managed to recover it from his penthouse, but it seemed important in that moment.

The jacket and the old picture that he's still clutching in his pocket, the only two things he cared enough to take. He doesn't even need to look at it to see the four happy smiles stained with watermelon juice. Two pink haired kids that could be confused by twins, one with a shy smile, the other with a cheerful one, happy to be included with his brother friends. Next, a fierce smile showing two small fangs, already a force of nature at his young age. In the middle, a blond kid with the most radiant smile Haruchiyo ever saw, capable of making everything shine just with his presence. Full of life, of dreams. Full of potential. Brighter than the sun, a true leader.

But that was a long time ago and, once again, Sanzu is the only one who remembers. The man staggering in the rain is now the only survivor from that photo. Only him, alone in this fuck up world where nothing and no one matters anymore. Not without Mikey. Even Bonten can burn from what he cares.

He keeps walking (it feels more like floating for him, floating in a cloud of pain and numbness at the same time). Until he finally reaches his destination, an abandoned bowling alley. Sanzu enters in some kind of trance, not sure if he's dissociating or too intoxicated. He doesn't care.

He sits down exactly in the same place his king sat down. How many days had passed since that moment? One? Two? Ages. It certainly feels like ages for him. Haruchiyo hugs himself, trying to make space for his legs inside the big comforting jacket. Completely curled up. And he cries, he cries like he hasn't allowed himself to do so in the last ten years.

He's starting to sober up, he can feel it. Because the flashbacks are coming back. Shinichiro jumping from that bridge. Mikey jumping from this exact building. Mikey falling from the stairs, that awful “clonk”. Mikey jumping again from this building.

Haruchiyo screams, holding his head with both hands, begging the images to stop, unable to continue reliving those memories. He needs everything to stop, to be quiet, his shattered mind can't take it anymore.

He takes out a small box from his pocket, looking at the content. Everything he needs is here, he knows how to do it, how to make sure he's not going to wake up from this trip. His stupid hands are shaking while he gets the syringe ready.

For some reason, he suddenly remembers Kakucho's words a few months ago. He hates it, he hates thinking in that fucker when he's about to die. But the other man was right, wasn't he? Mikey never cared about Sanzu, he spent years of his life trying to keep his king alive and it was all for nothing. Everything blew up in one night.

A manic laugh escapes between his whimpers. Of course is that, he's fucking jealous. Sanzu is fucking jealous because at least Kakucho got to held Izana's hand when he died, he got to comfort his king in his last moments. Sanzu didn't had that, Hanagaki was the one holding Mikey's hand. Always that cockroach, never him.

What did he expect anyway? Haruchiyo is just a failure. He never deserved to be the one making his king last moments less painful. Of course, he should had known. He failed everyone. He failed Shinichiro, unable to protect Mikey, to be the friend he promised he would be. He failed Mikey, watching him falling into the darkness, becoming the same empty shell he already saw in a past that never happened, and doing nothing about it.

Sanzu doesn't have anything left. He also killed his own chance of happiness a long time ago (he also failed his captain, didn't he?). The only thing left for him is to disappear, to follow his king. He's going with him, because he's being following Mikey for so long, that he doesn't see any other choice. He's going with him, because he doesn't deserve to keep living when he couldn't save Mikey.

But it's fine, the drug is already kicking in, his body feels more relaxed. Even his mind seems to be quiet, almost in peace. He looks at the old photo one last time, before drifting out of consciousness, looking for safety in the inner part of the leather, pretending it smells like cheesecake.

It's fine, because at the end of the day... Haruchiyo was just a failure.

[convxction]

SHIPPING INFO. answer the following for your muse(s) so people know how shipping works on your blog.

what’s your OTP for your muse(s)?

self love. jk. tbh i love all possible spouses for c.hrom because each of them is unique and adds to his personality and life. away from canons, i love my friends' ocs who are in relationship with him Rebecca, Takako, Lacie, Robin and Eira. My precious <3

what are you willing to RP when it comes to shipping?

Almost everything? I don't mind exploring any situation and plotline. I love exploring things, especially if it makes things semi realistic, as possible, not the uwu boy meets girl and now kiss~ nah fam.

how large does the age gap have to be to make it uncomfortable?

This is kind of question that gets you roll eyes no matter what you answer lmao. Personally, between 10 or 12 years as long as one of the parties are in the 20+. tbh i find some age gaps like 20 are cool to explore if the other is "old" and tired of life and suddenly upbeat and lively person be like hewo do you want to love life again? thats kind of cute the vibe of giving someone's life colors again. anyway yeah. as long as things make sense and legal lol

are you selective when shipping?

Honhon yeah. i no longer entertain everyone because I used to think everyone is fun and willing to write fun things and explore ideas and not just the 'imma book this muse ehe~' and bail out on me haha. we gotta have that telepathy moment lol. so yeah i want the good time not just booking muses so i can have their names in my relationship page like some sort of badge or achievement. dont get me wrong i understand what burnt out means. i dont want to control my partners' lives lmao. just be ...my friend too??? not just oh i lost interest in my muse, i will now proceed to ignore you. and yes it happened. a lot. and it is very annoying. ANYway, communication then communication then communication then just having fun. thats the key, yes.

how far do steamy moments have to go before they’re considered NSFW?

asking the person who sucks at writing it but uuuuuuuuh. when someone starts sliding dem fingers down the other's clothes and proceed to undress them. yep.

does one have to ask to ship with you?

I mean thats the way? unless you can say all the dwarven rules lmao then ask permission haha. jk. or is it? yeah i think of myself as friendly as a moogle. you are welcome to state your wish and we'll see if things can work out or not~

how often do you like to ship?

idk what to say 'how often'??? whenever a spark happens im not gonna shy away from trying out the ship. if it works then yey if it doesnt then thats a new exp for the both of us. and lets be real sometimes they can become the best of friends and it warms my heart to see we can still make out something in the end. HEY! even if they turn out to be rivals or heck enemies! thats kiss chef too dont think i dont support these relationships. i looooooooooove them.

are you multiship?

I guess so. I tried one time to make it a single blog and it was a painful experience when you pour all your heart into this ship that you missed potentially fun and interesting ships because you want to be loyal and then you get abandoned on a drop of a hat ahahahaaha. But yeah, I am not though I want to keep it single ship per muse portrayal. I won't ship with the same muse UNLESS all parties are ok but first and foremost your portrayal is different and gives new meaning for their relationship. i'm not here to horde everyone. been there saw that happened i dont want to do the same to others. its not nice feeling.

are you ship obsessed or ship more-or-less?

im here begging on my knees for people to befriend chr.om and not just ship wise but any sort of relationship. i dont want my blog to be ship centric anymore. i want FUN AND INTERESTING AND ANGSTY AND FLUFFY AND MIND BLOWING THINGS TO HAPPEN IN HERE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

what is your favorite ship in your current fandom?

a couple years ago id yell c.hrobinnnnn! now im too old for this war so forever and always ... Chrom and Shepherd pie. ask alm about it. jk. currently?? i dont have a preferred ship over the other; as i said above, i love them all. they each add something interesting about chr.om. tho in general i'd say ultimate ship is krumb and becca <3 we have built a lot over the years so basically it is kind of main ship at this point haha. rebecca my beloved <3

finally, how does one ship with you?

100 PUSH UP, 100 KILOMETER RUN GO GO GO. talk to me, really. i dont read minds. if you want to try something go ahead come and say yo what do you think? and i'll tell you lets go. lets see where this can go. but sometimes i know it does not work right from the get go so don't be sad or dejected if i said nah fam it wont work. sankyu kupopopo

tagged by: @gamenu [sankyuuuuuuu <3]

tagging: @isaaccecilbryant , @wayward-sword , @pieman1112 , @toestalucia +akira and anyone else if you wanna rant mwah <3, @psychcdelica (your pick), @dcviated (your pick), @coolrpblog , and you ! i tag you!

[badlucksav]

I'm fashionably late (as always) but today is Fanfic Writers Appreciation Day, so I need to gush about some very incredible, talented people, some of whom I'm very lucky to consider friends. This is probably going to be very lengthy, so if you don't want to see me scream about how amazing these lovely people are, I suggest you keep scrolling.

I've been in fandom for just over 2 years, and I've met some incredible people along the way. Here's what I love about them:

@neurologicaldamage as one of my oldest fandom friends, I have long enjoyed screaming excitedly at each other over new ideas or plot developments in existing fics. It was a thrilling ride waiting for each update of "These Scars of Ours". Your angst is the most exquisite type of pain I will gladly subject myself to over and over again.

@authorjoydragon JOY! My beloved multishipper. You are one of, if not the, biggest reason I have blossomed into the fully fledged multishipping trash that I am today. Your fics are like the sweetest, fluffiest piece of cake I can enjoy. I can't even remember the first fic I ever read from you. I definitely remember "Accidental Rendezvous" though, and I am forever honored you commissioned me for it! @orangepanic you took someone who wasn't even that into the LoK fandom and gave her a whole new OTP while she was on hiatus from Zutara. You are the captain of Irosami, and I am humbled to have become your first mate on this wonderful little ship. I have adored everything that I've read from you so far, but I am deeply enjoying "Hotman" and "Starvation Paradise", as well as your new gift for me, "There Was Only One Bed".

@homeagainrose Not only are you a talented writer, you are also an endless well of knowledge that has become invaluable to me (and many others, I'm sure). "Summer At the Swimming Dragon" is everything, and my excitement is palpable every time you update it. But of course, everything you write is superb (also a big fan of "Hello Sailor").

@asajjvxntress You were one of the first Zutara writers I stumbled across. It was "I've Got A Dark Alley" if memory serves, and definitely contributed to my love of modern AUs. I fell in love with "New Girl" and then watched the show, which is now one of my favorites and it's all because of you! Your output feeds our ship so well, and we are honored to have you.

@myargalargan O Captain, Our Captain of the lovely Sukka ship. Your writing is so darling. Sukka is so wholesome, but somehow it feels even more like that when you write them. You take a side pairing and make them a main pairing. "Our Little Remedy" was much anticipated, and I must thank you for introducing all of us to...you know *wink wink*.

@krastbannert My dude, the way you write is so...hauntingly captivating. Even on your happiest fics, there's always this slight air of melancholy that I just adore. The way you get into a character's head is so amazing, too. It feels like you've cracked them wide open and studied them to understand them as well as you do. "Brave Soldier Girl" captured my attention with just one chapter. @heavensenthearty you give 100% to everything you do with your writing. You have such a poetic way with words. It doesn't feel like first person works often with fanfic, but you always make it work perfectly. @its-sooz-again Where do I begin? The pairings, the topics, the characters you explore are sometimes things I never would have thought of, but when I read you writing (or look at your art) I think, wow, this just makes sense. I've always loved Jet, but you've given him such a profound sense of humanity for me that has deepened my love for our favorite traumatized orphan of war. "The Break in the Bend" lives rent free in my head.

@lone-star-ranger you write some of the best fluff! The way you seamlessly weave canon into AUs, AtLA with LoK, Azula with Star Wars, is incredible. You've gifted me so many wonderful fics and have truly become my first mate on the S.S. Yuten, for which I am always deeply indebted to you. "Perks of Matchmaking" is short and sweet, and I'm forever honored that my gift for you inspired a fic that you gifted to me. I've rambled on long enough, and thank you if you've made it this far. Here are some honorable mentions who deserve all of the praise, but I'll be here all night if I try: @siambre, @marijayne-writing, @barelyaware, @mycomfortblanket, @boomerangguy, @thatoneguy56fanfic, and so many others! Thank you for all that you do.

[brynfelan]

PFFFFFFT WAIT REALLY?! Listen hurt/comfort is my fav trope, I CAN KEEP GOING. NO LIES. Alright then here's another one! I think KuzuKomaHina would be interesting here, but if you're not comfortable with that then just Komahina is also great! (I'm a multishipper and my pain is immense. Gotta spread the love.) This could be either Non-despair...or Pre-despair depending on how much you wanna kill people. Heehee.

Hinata and Izuru are twins and both go to Hope's Peak, Izuru in the main course and Hinata in the reserve course. Hinata meets Izuru's hell class and they all warm up to him eventually, plus they feel bad for him. Izuru's an overgrown cat and Hinata's basically his babysitter, god bless his soul. Everything's somewhat hunky dory, because that Reserve vs Main course divide creates enough tension to be a problem. Then main class 78 is assembled, and Junko's batshit crazy and ready to drum up despair.

She still decides to try and break class 77, throw suspicion off of her and Mukuro, but there aren't any obvious cracks to be exploited within the class...until she sees the bonds they've all made with Hinata, Natsumi, and Sato. So Junko starts doing her despair schtick with those three, but mainly Hinata. I mean, mentally breaking the brother of the Ultimate Hope AND the boyfriend of one or two of the Ultimate Hope's classmates AT THE SAME TIME? That's the best first round of despair you can get, so Junko goes hard and all-in from the get-go with Hinata. She also starts with Natsumi and Sato, because their past is ROUGH and a great second round of despair for class 77.

But Hinata is her main focus. And when Hinata starts acting weird, class 77 don't know what's going on. Whether they figure out and save Hinata from Junko's plan or fall to Junko's game one by one is up to you...

multishipping is where it’s AT babeeey. i ship both hajime and fuyuhiko with ANYBODY that makes them happy, that’s it that’s my thing. and i like komahina. i like kuzuhina. kuzukomahina? that sounds IDEAL.

but oh man i love hajime and izuru being brothers? like, so much? and hajime as an honorary/adopted member of class 77b? my FRIEND this is too good.

izuru is 100% the first to notice what’s up. he lives with hajime, sees him all the fucking time, and on top of everything is the ultimate Everything. he doesn’t know WHAT’S up with hajime, but he does notice that hajime’s colder and spending less time with everybody. he blows off fuyuhiko and nagito (and they both take it VERY differently. nagito’s like “ah, it seems I’m not even good enough for a reserve course student, I am a bug!” and fuyuhiko is pissed off and basically yells at izuru to get his fucking brother in check), but then when they do see him he’s all weird and shit both fuyuhiko and nagito start hatching a plan to figure out what’s going on. izuru is in on it, because that’s his brother and he hates not knowing shit.

so uh, basically they start stalking hajime. they follow him around, take notes, like if this wasn’t his boyfriends and his brother this would be creepy as shit. slowly people start to ask where hajime is, or what’s up with him because like... dude’s usually one of the nicest motherfuckers out there and he’s gotten really fucking blunt recently. hell, sometimes he even gets mean, agreeing with nagito about him being worthless, that kinda shit and that’s when everybody really notices something is UP.

it ends up essentially becoming a class-wide thing, where they all report back to either izuru, nagito or fuyuhiko after seeing hajime. izuru is kinda the brains here, taking all the information he can get and analysing it, but it’s nothing he’s seen before ever.

and then one day, everybody’s wandering around the school grounds, and finds the stairway. when the walk through there, which is hajime’s idea, he disappears. like, off the face of the earth. it basically runs the same way as in the anime when chiaki is captured by junko, but instead he’s there willingly to show everybody he loves this beautiful thing called despair. he knows he’s going to die, and he loves it.

as shown previously though, izuru can’t be kept in one place if he doesn’t want to be there. ultimate escape artist who? anyway, when he hears junko’s voice, he knows what the fuck is up, he knows some shit’s about to go down if they don’t intervene immediately. the man manages to get them out of there, and starts running. everybody’s running with him (except for teruteru who’s complaining that he’s too short to go as fast as everybody else lmao). unfortunately, this is not anime izuru and he doesn’t know the layout of the place, but he does remember exactly where hajime disappeared and uses that to help him.

when they do find hajime, he’s basically bleeding out and he’s fucking pleased about it. he starts saying a load of really mean shit to fuyuhiko and nagito, how he hates them and shit, and it’s taking everything for fuyuhiko not to just deck him. yeah he’s dying, but he’s also being a massive douche?

most of the class carry hajime to the nurse’s office, so that mikan can stabilise him. izuru, nagito and fuyuhiko absolutely have more business in this building. using some logic that i am too tired to figure out because it’s nearly 6 in the morning rn they find junko, who blames mukuro entirely for everything going wrong. it isn’t mukuro’s fault, but that’s not the point here at all. she’s got the brainwashing video ready anyway, and starts going to play it when nagito just fuckin tackles her. this scrawy twink literally throws himself at junko at full force. fuyuhiko is restraining mukuro and izuru stops the video from playing.

back with hajime, when they were transporting him back to somewhere that he can be treated properly, juzo probably saw them and went in to try and find junko because they’ve got their whole thing. he walks in to find a skinny twink and a shortass restraining the Ultimate Despairs, and the human embodiment of a cat fucking with a brainwashing video. it would be hilarious if a student didn’t nearly just die.

either way, hajime gets stabilised but he’s still Royally Fucked Up and has to be basically restrained to stop him from trying to get back to Junko. Junko and Mukuro get fucking arrested (this will later cause media uproar because everybody loves Junko, but that’s not the focus here), and Izuru has to come up with a way to fix his brother.

I’m gonna leave that here because I need fukin SLEEP and maybe come back to it when I’m less dead but i am a sucker for a happy ending after a load of angst so for now ya get a happy(ish) ending, with everybody alive! for now!