#pão de churrasco

[namariadicas]

Receita Pão de Alho com Queijo

[neiptune]

i'm gonna kiss you like the sun cw: 3k wc, female reader, suggestive if you squint, barely proofread, this is sooo self indulgent and warm and fluffy and i just love him to the moon and back like trigger warning he's perfect

Brazil really is everything Shoyo said it would be.

He wasn’t sure about bringing you to Rio at first, insisted that São Paulo alone would’ve been more comfortable, but you really wanted to explore the city that welcomed him for two whole years so long ago. You’re so glad he decided to accomodate the request: witnessing the stars in his eyes as you wandered around the city, feeling the emotion laced into his tone as he described special spots and introduced you to old friends in confident portuguese, getting to observe how perfectly tangerine curls caught the soft light of sunsets on flawless beaches… made it all worth it.

São Paulo was nice too: ever the cosmopolitan metropolis, it reminded you of Tokyo albeit in a completely original way. Shoyo was given a nice, comfortable apartiment in Chácara Flora but you spent little to no time in there, too busy exploring Ibirapuera park, different museums, climbing all the way up the Farol Santander building and enjoying oh so much good food. However, as much as you loved the city and its locals, Rio is different.

The sky is so big it hurts to look at, an impossible shade of blue makes one feel as if each morning nature paints it the most marvelous nuance just to make sure you’d spend a little extra time with your head tilted back. Colorful streets are filled with music at all times, bubbly enough to persuade complete strangers to attempt a few improvised steps on the way home or right outside a bar, on nights when the mere fact of being alive makes the world feel just a tad bit more magical. Your taste buds have been blessed with the most delicious servings of feijoada, churrasco, coxinha and pão de queijo, one of Hinata’s personal favorites.

The amount of love Shoyo has for Rio makes more sense now that you get to experience his deep connection with the city firsthand. No wonder he calls it his second home: the first real gift he bought for himself was a luxurious penthouse in Ipanema, complete with terrace, a gorgeous view on the beach and a private pool. He never misses the chance to fly his family or friends for a vacation, certainly happy to have a well-situated life in both São Paulo and Tokyo but equally joyous at the prospect of making additional special memories in the city that is still so dear to him.

It’s the first time you accepted to visit, always more inclined to simply wait for him to return to either Tokyo or the Miyagi prefecture. Flying is not exactly your favorite activity and 20+ hours of planes have always been a pretty convincing deterrent. Turns out, missing your boyfriend too much is an equally strong incentive.

And so you’re here, on one of the most beautiful beaches on the other side of the world, sitting on a  comfortable towel and still a bit jet lagged as you excitedly recount the latest gossip about one of your colleagues, secretly planning to propose to her girlfriend soon. Except it feels like you’re the only one hearing the story.

“Shoyo”, you pout, “are you listening?”.

“No”, he says right away, blunt in his honesty as always, gaze fixed on something distant above your shoulder, brows furrowed in worry “sorry, I’ll be right back” and just like that, he gets up from the towel you’re sharing to walk off toward a destination you can only pinpoint when you turn your head around.

There’s a beach volleyball court, because of course there is, and a group of boys seems to be having a good time playing. For some reason the teams are not balanced, it’s two against three, but they’re all laughing and having fun. All except one, a kid sitting on the sand not too far away from those you can only guess are his friends, scowl deep and brows furrowed. While the others look like teenagers, he seems way younger with those lanky arms and thin legs. From the way he’s begrudgingly observing the game, it wouldn’t be unfair to assume that he wasn’t allowed to play.

Shoyo approaches him with the wave of a hand and a friendly inflection in his portuguese. It doesn’t take long for the kid to replace a deeply wary expression with a more relaxed one. He nods at some point and your boyfriend sits next to him on the sand, at reasonable distance to make sure the kid is comfortable being so close to a stranger, baseball cap pushed further down as he observes the game. Your best guess is that he asked the boy if it was okay for him to watch the match with him, probably introduced himself simply as someone who’s passionate about the sport.

You observe as Shoyo’s lips move but his eyes stay focused on the court, comments and possibly suggestions mumbled to himself, a few claps and cheers for good measure. It’s the boy that wants to talk to him now, he’s probably asking a few questions and Hinata can finally accomplish what was probably his mission all along. They chat for a bit, then the kid shrugs and angrily shakes his head, utters something under his breath and you can see the disapproval in the downwards curve of your boyfriend’s mouth. He’s up again after a while, as he walks off the boy yells something you don’t understand after him. When Hinata is back shortly after, there’s a ball in his hands and a wide grin on his face.

It takes some convincing and putting a good amount of distance between them and the group, but eventually Shoyo is able to convince him to play. When the kid gets up from the sand, you can’t help but smile: he’s not nearly as tall as his friends.

It starts with some easy setting drills, then forearm bumps. You’re lying on your tummy now, book in hand but still a few glances curiously directed to where they’re enjoying themselves. You can hear Shoyo’s laugh and see his companion’s now relaxed features, smile beaming as he digs to try and catch your boyfriend’s spikes. He most certainly willingly misses a few of the boy’s ones, dramatically throws himself on the powdery sand now sticking to their chests and backs. Yet, they’re having a good time. While probably risking a sunstroke but still, they’re enjoying themselves.

And so you relax, focus on your designated beach read, content to finally have some time to digest a few additional pages. The main character decides to spend the summer on a remote island in the middle of the pacific ocean, meets a group of friends and begins a dreamy intimate friendship with one attractive, local surf instructor.

You’re devouring the chapter following their one night stand when the shadow of someone crouching down in front of your towel makes your gaze flicker up.

“Hey beautiful”, Shoyo grins, all flushed cheeks and glistening shoulders, “wanna go for a swim with me?”.

He doesn’t apologize for having left so abruptly and, as you push back some of the hair sticking to his forehead, it’s a relief to find yourself not as bruised as you'd feel at the beginning of your relationship. Shoyo has taught you that not every gesture or word carries actual malice: he has his own way of looking at the world and will leave in the middle of a conversation if he witnesses a kid being unfairly tossed aside. It’s what makes him, him. And you love him so much.

“That was very kind of you”, he downplays your compliment instantly, with a shake of the head. Shoyo doesn’t always apologize but he never fails to explain.

“It was nothing, we just played a little. Then one of his friends recognized me and asked for an autograph, so I think Marcelo finally felt more confident. He’s really talented, you know? I told him about all the people who never wanted to play with me either and that he should never allow anyone to tell him that he’s not good enough to do what he loves”, he smiles and then softly grasps the hand still gently running through his locks to press it to his lips.

“Should’ve told him about the little giant”, you grin.

“I did! But he didn’t seem too interested in gringos, was wary of me too when I approached him”.

“Well, I’m pretty sure this particular gringo has made his day”.

Shoyo’s chuckle is soft and you press a kiss to the portion of his knee that is not covered in sand before closing your book with a loud thud and shoving it back into your bag.

“Was I gone for long? Did you get bored?”, he offers a hand to help you stand up and you bask in the comfort of his sincere worry. He may get distracted easily but you’re never not among his priorities.

“Didn’t get bored. Did miss you”.

“Oh no”, a mischievous glint flashes in his eyes, “whatever we should do about that”.

A yelp is heard when he pulls you into him and picks you up in one fluid motion, laugh like a melody when you grumble some nonsense about how sweaty he is and the amount of sand that is now sticking to your body as well.

“See? Now we both need a good rinse” Shoyo kisses your pout away and smiles against the comforting curve of your lips when he feels your legs wrap around his waist.

“Can’t stand you” the good natured affront only makes him chuckle harder as he carries you toward the shore, precious cargo clinging onto him like a koala bear.

“Ah, you were standing for me alright this morning against the wall”.

You furrow your brows as you meet his playful gaze. “I think you’re spending too much time with the wrong Miya twin”.

Tongue in cheek, Shoyo shrugs nonchalantly and tightens his arms around you when you shudder as the water hugs his waist and your ankles. He doesn’t let go and is glad you don’t seem inclined to pull away either, satisfied with being held as you gently wash the sand from his chest and shoulders once your boyfriend settles where the atlantic is deeper but still shallow enough for him to stand.

Shoyo never thought he could’ve loved Rio more than he already does but having you there is an entirely new kind of magic he didn’t believe he’d ever experience. If he didn’t think he’d scare you off and if the rational part of his brain didn’t acknowledge that it would be horribly unfair, it wouldn’t take but a second to ask you to move there with him. For him.

His life is perfect but never complete so long you’re not there to share it. He wants you always, will need you forever, and for a fleeting moment his stomach squeezes when the feeble vision of a white dress flashes before his eyes.

“I love you”, he utters softly, “I love that you’re here”. So much.

He thinks of the sunflowers sitting all pretty in a vase right below his kitchen window, an apartment instantly made all the more special. He receives flowers from fans and his family but you’re the only person who regularly gets them for him. Not because it’s his birthday, not to celebrate or as consolation. The first time you went out for dinner he had some red roses and you showed up with an identical bouquet. Then grinned: I just thought you’d like them. He did.

Shoyo knows you like the back of his hand, so there’s no chance he’d miss the slight hesitation in your smile as you murmur that you love him back.

“Something wrong?”,  he searches your features for any hint of discomfort. You huff, offer some sarcasm to cover up your worries.

“Sometimes I’m not entirely sure it’s good to have such a perceptive boyfriend”.

Alarm bells ring into his head, albeit the sound is distant. If something serious was on your mind, surely you would’ve told him.

“Wanna talk about it?” he doesn’t necessarily want to make this about himself but also desperately wants to ask if it’s him who did something to upset you.

“It’s stupid”.

“It’s never stupid if it troubles you”.

It takes a deep breath and the gentle roll of the waves to gather the right words, one of his hands calmingly rubbing soft circles on your back.

“I just… sometimes I guess I find it hard to believe that you miss me”.

Shoyo’s face falls, hand halts its movements.

“What?”.

“This is entirely on me!”, you hope the quick clarification is enough to alleviate the torment written all over his features, “it’s not something I’m blaming you for! You don’t do anything wrong, ever”.

It doesn’t work. The shock melts into genuine heartache.

“Why would you think that?”, his voice comes out thin and low, a broken whisper. Fuck.

“Because I go through illogical moments and feelings. It’s not you who makes me feel like that, it’s just my brain”.

“Where does your brain get that assumption from?”.

You sigh, loosen the hold around his neck. It’s really hard to put your insecurities into words, especially to the one person who never gave you a single reason to doubt about his affection. It makes you feel like an asshole.

Even during such a disheartening moment, Shoyo thinks of you first. He has no trouble sustaining your weight and keeping you pressed against him with one arm alone, as his other hand gently cups your face to tilt it upwards.

“It’s because I’m happy here”. Not a question. He really does know you better than anyone else.

“You are. And I love that you are. I’m just being a jerk”.

Truth is, you miss him so much it feels unbearable at times. You’d go through such horrible days, hours long crying sessions, only to then open up your instagram and find posts and stories of him laughing, smiling, always having the time of his life. You’d never want him to feel miserable, he deserves everything he has and more. But you’d lie if you said it didn’t occasionally sting. You’d lie if you said you never felt like he didn’t need you after all.

Shoyo hums as he resumes his soft rubbing, thumb gently skimming over the skin under your eye.

“I am happy. I love living in this country and the people in it. I love my job. I’m lucky, my life is perfect”.

“I know. I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to-”, his thumb is now pressing onto your lips as a tiny smile stretches his.

“And yet. It’s only complete if you’re with me. Did your brain know that?” he tilts his head to the side “I always miss you. When I’m playing, when I’m not playing, if I’m out with the team, while having breakfast, as I go to sleep. If you’re not where I am, I miss you. I’m happy but I’m not whole. Tell that to your brain for me, yeah?”.

He chuckles when you just look at him, stunned.

“I’m sorry”, you whisper once more.

“Ah, man!”, Shoyo’s laugh is jovial, “I wish I could buy this beach. I wish it was just ours, no people around. Then I could show you just how much I missed you”.

“Shoyo!”, you click your tongue in disapproval.

His gaze softens, genuine affection oozing from a stare so sincere it makes your heart flutter. “I’d buy you this beach if I could. All the beaches. Hell, the entire country. You know that, right? There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you. I’d buy you the planet, the entire world, then break the news to everyone else. Too bad, guys, you have to leave! It’s ours now”.

“You’re so silly”, despite the smile, there’s a tiny quiver to your voice and you hope to fuck you don’t burst out crying in the middle of the atlantic ocean just because your boyfriend is in love with you. He means it, you know he does. If someone told him there was a way to buy the planet for you, he’d actually do it. Hinata says what’s on his mind at all times, never been one to lie or exaggerate: he’s just like that, hand-on-heart honest.

“Yeah. And I love you. Please don’t forget that or I’m gonna have to purchase the earth”, his grin is infectious and you can’t help but mirror it as you run a hand through his hair, dampening the shorter bangs into a darker burnt sienna.

“Don’t need it. I have you, you’re already my world”, the second the words fall from your lips you gag so loudly a few tourists turn to look, Shoyo’s mirthful laughter filling your ears and heart. “God, I was never this corny. Look what you turned me into, I think I’m gonna be sick”, your grimace is adorable to him and, judging by the pinkish hue emerging on tanned skin and among freckles, he’s not exactly opposed to sappiness.

“I think you should kiss me”, Shoyo mumbles, but it’s a formality really, because his hand leaves your face cold as he pulls you into a breathless kiss by the back of your head. It’s not entirely appropriate to kiss like that with people around but he chases you whenever you try to pull back, determination burning fiercely as he keeps you pressed against his body.

It feels more than perfect. It feels whole. It feels like everything he’ll ever need.

[kyuala]

oi diva kyuala só queria compartilhar que sonho todos os dias com o seguinte cenário: estar em uma casa de praia alugada com o enzo e alguns outros amigos, passar o dia na praia, depois tomar banho de piscina a noite, comer uma comidinha gostosa no jantar, beber umas caipirinhas enquando a gente dança mpb agarradinho sabe bem brasilcore bem namorada brasileira e seu gringo que já praticamente adotou a cultura porque ama tudo que remete a ela...é isso, indo chorar até dormir.

(ps: também fico que nem aquele meme do "queria fazer amor com o sr" pq imagina uma transa lentinha com o enzo depois de uma noite de caipirinha, mpg e chamego 😓)

ai tópico sensibilíssimo acho um dos picos do namoro brasileiro alugar casa na praia com os amigos e curtir tanto de casal como em grupo 😭 imagino mto ele nessa skin aqui ó 👇🏼

e ele tem uma carinha de quem ajudaria em TUDO (seria alugado pra ficar na churrasqueira em vários momentos e ficaria morrendo de amores quando vc vai lá fazer companhia pra ele, embora ele te fale várias vezes pra voltar pra piscina e pra rodinha dos seus amigos pra vc curtir também 💔) e, mesmo mais reservado, se aproximaria de todo mundo ali na viagem e ficaria todo coradinho quando percebesse que vc tá observando ele socializar com os seus amigos com um sorrisinho de orgulho no rosto 😞

ia amar comer comidas típicas de viagens assim (nosso churrasco, aquele macarrão com salsicha de lei e pão francês com presunto e queijo pra td mundo no café), experimentar todos os drinks que vcs inventassem (e tomaria até os que ele mais detestasse, contanto que tenha sido vc quem fez, pq ele não sabe dizer não pra sua carinha) e ouvir uma mpbzinha bem calminha no final da noite, ficando de chameguinho na rede no quintal da casa depois de dançar agarradinho contigo 💭

e daí na hora de dormir (se vcs dois estivessem dividindo um quarto sozinhos, pois ele ainda é um homem reservado ✋🏼) ele ia esperar vcs se arrumarem e estarem deitados bem juntinhos na cama pra começar a te abraçar, te apertar, deixar beijinhos no seu pescoço e te dar uns cheirinhos, tudo beeeem devagarinho e até letárgico porque pra ele vcs tem todo o tempo do mundo e ele quer passar ele inteirinho com você. a transa ia ser de conchinha mesmo, sem se mexerem muito do lugar ou saírem das posições iniciais, tudo pra desgrudar de vc o mínimo possível. faria bem lentinho e viraria seu rosto pra beijar sua boca quando conseguisse ou pelo menos ficar com as testas, os narizinhos bem grudados quando não. e quando ele estivesse prestes a gozar (e ele não sossega até vc gozar também, a mão não perdendo tempo pra se encaminhar corpo a baixo e massagear seu clitóris com as pontas dos dedos), só então ele aceleraria o compasso (e só um pouco), subindo a mão pra encaixar bem embaixo da sua orelha, apertando os cabelos da nuca onde os dedos conseguissem alcançar, derramando tudinho em vc, a respiração pesada ao pé do seu ouvido quando ouvisse ele comentar que teriam que levantar pra tomar um banho antes de realmente irem dormir agora - a risada e o cansaço na voz denunciando a mínima vontade de sair do mundinho de amor quietinho de vocês

e todas nós ficamos assi 👇🏼

tbm tenho coisas a dissertar sobre um enzo nesse cenário que não quer nem um pouco fazer amor lentinho mas fica pra próxima 💭

[brazilian-enigma]

Quackity, QSMP and Brazil

I've seen some people talk about this and I will too, using this account on Tumblr rather than Twitter bc I believe my range is higher here.

It has been made clear how important QSMP is to us, Brazilians, since the introduction of the CC's from our country into the server. Those five months have been bliss - to be in touch with so many other countries, communities and people. Learn their culture, their differences. Be respected.

But this trip they took to Brazil? I have never been so fucking happier in my life. Never have I seen someone from outside be dazzled with the country I was born in. Things I keep seeing in my everyday life are something extraordinary to someone else; Philza being enamored with Guaraná, a drink I love. Foolish absolutely demolishing churrasco and blue corote. Fit liking pão de queijo. Things that are so simple to me.

And yet - to them, they are new. Brazil, despite us joking that it is a completely fucked up place, is such a rich country in every single aspect. We are the fifth biggest country in the world. Our people are very diverse, never the same. The heart of nations. Still, continuously pushed aside. We are frequent victims of xenophobia, jokes and disrespect. Our identity is erased.

Then, think of me and Quackity's last stream. He is wearing a goddamn Brazilian shirt. A symbol that has been terribly distorted after our last political events. I don't see it as terrible anymore. Instead, I opened the biggest grin of my life. I thought of Richarlyson (miss him, btw). I thought of how lovely he, Quackity, looked. Mister Quackity, owner and creator of the first multilingual Minecraft server of the world… Wearing a Brazilian shirt with more pride than me. I teared up.

Since QSMP, I learned to respect my identity. My culture. My language. My country. I am not alone in this, I will never be alone in this. After all, we are a community, a very large community. Our voices will always be heard. Quackity just made sure that happened first.

[geniousbh]

galera, minha dyva babilonesca @kyuala já deu o papo sobre esse homem, e vejam bem esse video🔇😫😫😫😫 o tipo de maridinho que te acompanha nos eventos e fica mais atrás sabe, se apresenta só depois de você introduzir ele primeiro e quase nunca se produz muito, porque ele tem >gosto< por te deixar ser o centro das atenções. "sei lá, cara, você não fica incomodado que todo mundo queira conversar com ela? abraçar, dar beijinho no rosto?", e o pardella ri PORRA🥶 "já te ocorreu que ela me passa segurança igual eu passo pra ela?" ele responde simples mas com um fundinho de triunfo porque sabe que ali já calou o colega incoveniente, mas vai continuar "ela encontra comigo tudo que ela precisa, as contas tão pagas, meus sogros me amam e toda noite quem maceta a buceta gostosa dela sou eu"😅 como se tivesse falando sobre o tempo, dando de ombros.

este homem aqui te bancaria tudo, compra no supermercado, roupa nova, todo começo de semana é um pix no valor de um salário mínimo por mais que você seja toda independente, uma vez que é a mulher dele, você merece e deve ser mimada. nas viagens, nos churrascos, é ele que peita tudo. furou o pneu do carro? "eu vou trocar rapidinho, mô, fica aqui dentro, pode ser perigoso na pista essas horas", literal pau pra toda obra💪🏻🪵 não reclama de ficar na grelha preparando as carninhas e quando sai a que você pediu toda bicudinha pra ele fazer o agustin pega, faz um lanchinho com pão e vinagrete e leva até você falando pra abrir a boquinha!!! "ficou gostoso?", ele pergunta - tá todo suadinho do calor do fogo - e se curva pra te dar um selinho demorado dps que você confirma!

ele é tão viril fazendo tão absurdamente pouco, tem um perfume com notas amadeiradas, mas ainda fresco e a barba é toda limpinha porque ele cuida direitinho. é simplesmente O MELHOR🏆 com crianças e bebês o que te faz ficar com o útero coçando sempre que se encontram com amigos que tiveram filho ou quando algum menininho/menininha se aproxima de vocês num restaurante! ele troca o maior papo e ainda diz "olha que carinha maneiro" quando o pivete vai embora😵🥴🥴🕊🪦 fora que apesar de ele parecer visualmente estoico este Homem te entende como ninguém, se vc tá com cólica ele sabe o que comprar, não precisa falar, se você tá estressada ele te dá a opção de desabafar, mas se não estiver afim ele dá uma massagemzinha nos teus pés - te liberando a tensão e acabando por te deixar fogosa❣🔥🔞

enfim, era dentro demais esqueça tudo🤑🙅

[star-elysiam]

na minha mente o Enzo e o Pipe AMARIAM ir num churrasquinho de família com a loba, tomar uma brejinha, ficar assim 😵‍💫😵‍💫 olhando ela dançando pagode e depois ir (tentar) dançar junto com ela, sempre dando beijinho no pescoço e cheirando ela aiaiai 😭😭😭

Nossa sim 🥹

Eu super vejo o Pipe meio envergonhado no começo, indo todo arrumadinho e ficando mais na dele no começo. É educado e simpático com todo mundo, lógico mas no começo fica mais observando e entendendo os costumes da sua família.

Depois que se acostumar com sua família e ficar mais confortável (que não vai demorar muito), vai passar o dia sem camisa com a blusa do River no ombro o tempo inteiro, a correntinha que não sai do pescoço dele, vai usar um boné virado pra trás, uma bermuda, a havaianas branca que você deu de presente e a latinha de cerveja para terminar de compor o look para o final de semana com a família da namorada.

Vai querer ajudar com a churrasqueira e vai fazer questão de te dar os primeiros e os melhores pedaços que forem assados. Seu prato tá vazio? Aqui amor, toma esse pedaço de carne e um pão de alho. Que um suco, cerveja ou refrigerante? Desse jeitinho. E não pensem que é para impressionar sua família, ele só gosta de cuidar da amada dele.

O Enzo vai querer impressionar na roupa também, desde o primeiro encontro, lógico. Mas uma coisa é certa, desde o primeiro momento a papete vai estar lá.

Vai amar fazer alguns storys da sua família dançando e se divertindo. Vai postar com algum samba de roda mais antigo, pq é a cara dele

Vai se divertir com aquela pessoa da sua família que ama soltar piadinhas clássicas e que vai tentar ensinar ele a contar essas piadas também. Principalmente se chegar a hora da sobremesa e for pavê, aí você pode ter certeza que vai ouvir a clássica risada dele com a mão no peito

Ama aprender a fazer os acompanhamentos do churrasco, como a salada de maionese, vai ficar apaixonado por vinagrete e farofa, vai achar o molho de alho divino e vai querer comer sempre

E quando você resolve ir dançar? A única coisa que eles vão conseguir pensar vai ser um "Meu Deus, nena" e te encarar assim 🥴😵😵‍💫🤤

Eles vão te olhar dançar até alguém gritar "vai lá, dança com ela também" e eles vão. Porém se eles vão conseguir dançar já é outra história mas é certo que eles vão arriscar sim e vão se divertir horrores.

A parte favorita vai ser a possibilidade de ficar agarradinho com você, colocar as mãos na sua cintura (respeitosamente pq estão na frente de todo mundo) e sentir seu quadril se movimentar junto com a melodia

(eu quero eles no churrasco da minha família 😭)

[idollete]

diva infelizmente eles não podem comer a gente então quais comidas do brasil cada um deles iam gostar mais?

ADMKALKKSDJANDJASCAD NÃO AGUENTEI ESSA

agustín: adoraria as comidas do norte e nordeste (e isso é meio óbvio pq o divo já foi pro rn e EU ADORO ESSA TOUR DELE AQUI NO BR AFFFFFFFFFF), ele adoraria uma caranguejada ou um vatapá, ia comer até lamber os dedos

matías: um pratão de feijoada e uma coquinha bem gelada depois (eu sei que coca não é br mas esse é um grande combo)

esteban: galinha caipira e mugunzá (e eu não preciso nem explicar, ele é igual a menino do interior meio tapado meio lesado)

fran: coxinha, açaí, brigadeiro ou alguma coisa que vai em outro extremo, tipo pato no tucupi

santi: pão de queijo

simón: acarajé e biscoito de polvilho beeem carioquinha

fernando: arroz carreteiro

pipe: churrasco bem br, no espeto, com farofa e vinagrete (plus: ele ia ficar tão apaixonado que ia falar com a boca cheia, cuspindo farofa pra tudo que é canto KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK)

não faço ideia do que o enzo comeria, gente, mas vou dizer que qualquer versão vegana de pratos do norte/nordeste também

[amethvysts]

baseado nas vozes da minha cabeça, não consigo parar de pensar no pipe aparecendo de penetra na casa de praia que você e seus amigos alugaram. diazão de sol e churrasco rolando, todo mundo banhado a cloro de piscina e se abastecendo de cerveja gelada. o quintal é uma bagunça, cheio de isopor e bola de todos os esportes por todo lado.

conhecido do seu amigo, o felipe vai chegar lá com a maior cara de vergonha, sendo carregado pelos ombros. com as bochechas mais vermelhas que os detalhes da camisa do river plate que ele tá usando, o pipe só tem coragem de concordar com tudo o que seu amigo explica: "achei esse hermano perdido por aí quando eu fui comprar pão".

mas a cara de bobo engana, e muito. basta umas cervejas e um pratão de vinagrete com farofa (que quase empurram guela abaixo, porque ele fica de graça e recusa de primeira), que o pipe tá de pé e jogando uma partida de futevôlei na sua rodinha. com uma mistura muito doida entre português e espanhol, todo mundo se zoa, mas o principal foco é o argentino que não sabe dominar a bola direito. surpreendentemente, ele leva as piadas com bom humor, rindo enquanto as bochechas ficam coradinhas sob o sol quente – talvez até demais pra compensar o fato de que ele não quer fazer bico, principalmente na sua frente.

ele não é nem um pouco sutil com os olhares, mas as encaradas que geralmente te acuariam só alimentam seu ego; te fazem entrar na rodinha pra jogar bola, fazer passes pra ele, dando corda como pode. tentando te impressionar, ele tenta fazer umas embaixadinhas ou até dominar a bola de peito, mas felipe parece tão distraído pelo som da sua risada e pelo seu sotaque, que ele se embola todo. mas, pelo lado positivo, ele ainda tá te fazendo rir.

e quando você se afasta do grupo, se aproximando da churrasqueira, ele imediatamente vai junto. tipo um cachorrinho perdido que te escolheu como o humano preferido – mesmo que ele nem te conheça direito. felipe chega do seu lado, fingindo que vai mexer em alguma coisa por ali, até ganhar o seu olhar inquisitivo. é preciso muito autocontrole pra não ficar de boca aberta com o visual: seus olhos, de primeira, vão direto pros ombros, notando o quão queimada a pele parece ali. sobem pro pescoço, vendo a correntinha pendurada, até que finalmente param no rosto. os lábios vermelhos, assim como o narizinho queimado pelo sol.

"o que foi, garoto?" talvez seja ríspida demais na abordagem, mas ele nem parece se importar, te encarando com um sorriso no rosto. assim que ele abre a boca pra falar, com o portunhol arranhado e saindo com uma rapidez impressionante, você se sente até um pouco baqueada. "devagar," você pede.

então, assim que ele começa a repetir a frase, lento e gesticulando o suficiente pra não restar dúvidas, os seus olhos caem de novo sob a boca de pipe. e quase de imediato, o cérebro dele tem um curto-circuito quando percebe o seu olhar fixado ali. a frase começa a ser abandonada até ele cair em completo silêncio, esquecendo totalmente o que queria te perguntar. "como é?" a pergunta parte de você, que, inocente e distraída, nem percebe os efeitos do seu olhar.

existe coisa melhor do que reviver um blog empoeirado pra escrever sobre suas mais novas obsessões? fiquei tão feliz por achar uma comunidade tão querida e acolhedora aqui que meus dedos tavam coçando pra escrever de novo (e em português!). obrigada a todas as divas que alimentam as tags aqui do tumblr com esses conteúdos deliciosos <3

[anivi02]

uma hora dessas queria tá sentada no colo do felipe com ele me dando churrasco e pão de alho. a mãozona desse tamanho 🫸 🫷 na minha coxa ��😭

[ludovicagirl]

A CAIPIRINHA!

“Bruno, vindo pela primeira vez no Brasil, conhecer a família da namorada e ficando bebinho de caipirinha.” 

| Bruno x Reader

| Gênero: Comédia romântica

Você esperava ansiosa por essa viagem ao Brasil. Desde que começou a namorar Bruno, sonhava com o dia em que ele conheceria sua família. Afinal, apesar de toda a fama e glamour que o rodeavam, você sabia que Bruno Mars se sentiria em casa no calor acolhedor do seu país.

O avião aterrissou no Rio de Janeiro numa tarde ensolarada. Bruno estava deslumbrado com a paisagem da cidade vista de cima, o Pão de Açúcar e o Cristo Redentor, que pareciam tão próximos que quase dava para tocá-los. Ele sorriu para você, ansioso para o que viria a seguir. Assim que saíram do aeroporto, o calor tropical do Brasil o envolveu, e ele riu ao ver que você já estava se abanando com as mãos.

— Bem-vindo ao Brasil! — você exclamou, puxando-o para perto de si.

— Eu já tô amando esse lugar — ele respondeu, passando o braço em volta dos seus ombros enquanto caminhavam em direção ao carro que os esperava.

A casa da sua família era uma mistura de barulho e alegria, exatamente como você havia descrito para ele. Tias, primos, avós, todos estavam ali para conhecer "o namorado gringo da menina", como sua tia insistia em chamar Bruno. Ele entrou meio sem jeito, mas logo foi acolhido por um abraço que quase o derrubou.

— Seja bem-vindo, Bruno! — diz sua mãe, apertando as bochechas dele, algo que você sabia que ela faria.

Bruno ri, surpreso e encantado com o carinho da sua família. Seus primos e tios já estão se reunindo ao redor, curiosos para conhecer o homem que conquistou seu coração. Todos estão falando ao mesmo tempo, e Bruno tenta acompanhar o português rápido.

— Meu Deus, ele é mais bonito pessoalmente! — comentou sua tia, sem nenhum filtro.

— Você é menor do que eu pensava! — comentou um dos seus primos, em tom de brincadeira, o que arrancou uma gargalhada de Bruno.

— Eu sei, cara! Na TV eu pareço maior, né? — ele respondeu, rindo enquanto todos ao redor riam também.

Logo, vocês estavam sentados à mesa, rodeados de pratos típicos. Seu pai, que era um verdadeiro mestre em fazer caipirinhas, se aproximou de vocês com um copo na mão.

— Bruno, essa aqui é a famosa caipirinha brasileira. Você tem que experimentar.

— Ah, eu estava esperando por isso! — Ele respondeu entusiasmado, pegando o copo e dando um grande gole.

O sabor cítrico do limão, o doce do açúcar e o toque forte da cachaça fizeram seus olhos brilharem. Bruno sorriu, gostando imediatamente da bebida.

— Isso é bom demais! — Bruno exclamou, já se servindo de mais.

Você não pôde deixar de rir ao ver como ele estava se adaptando tão rápido. Conforme a tarde avançava, Bruno já estava no seu terceiro copo, e você percebeu que ele começava a ficar mais solto. As histórias que ele contava ficavam cada vez mais engraçadas, e todos à mesa riam sem parar.

— Essa caipirinha é poderosa, hein? — Ele comentou, rindo sozinho. — Eu... acho que estou vendo duas de você.

— Bruno, acho que é melhor dar um tempo nas caipirinhas. — Você disse, segurando o riso.

— Que nada, amor. Estou ótimo! — Ele respondeu, com a voz um pouco arrastada.

Ele tentou se levantar para pegar um pedaço de carne no churrasco, mas quase caiu de volta na cadeira. Seus primos, que estavam por perto, começaram a rir, e logo a risada contagiou todo mundo.

— Acho que seu namorado já tomou todas por hoje — Seu pai comenta, rindo, enquanto dá um tapinha nas costas de Bruno.

— Parece que o gringo não aguentou a caipirinha! — Seu tio brincou, arrancando mais risadas.

Bruno, sempre com um sorriso no rosto, olhou para você meio confuso, mas ainda encantador.

— Acho que subestimei essa bebida... Você acha que sua mãe tem algum café? — Ele perguntou, tentando recuperar a compostura.

— Claro, vou pegar um pra você. —Você respondeu, ainda rindo.

Enquanto você ia buscar o café, Bruno continuou tentando se explicar para sua família, misturando português e inglês de uma forma hilária.

— Eu... I mean... Eu amo... essa bebida, mas... acho que ela me ama mais, entende? — Ele balbuciou, arrancando mais gargalhadas de todos.

Quando você voltou com o café, encontrou seu tio sempre o mais brincalhão, puxando uma das músicas mais icônicas das festinhas de família:

— Pessoal, agora é a hora da "Barata da Vizinha"! — Ele anunciou com entusiasmo. Todos na sala começaram a cantar juntos:

— Toda vez que eu chego em casa, a barata da vizinha tá na minha cama...

Bruno, já um pouco tonto por causa da caipirinha, olhava ao redor confuso, tentando acompanhar o ritmo e entender o que estava acontecendo. Quando a música parou, todos se viraram para ele, esperando a resposta:

— Diz aí, Bruninho, o que 'cê vai fazer? — Perguntou seu tio, com um sorriso malicioso.

Bruno, com o olhar perdido e um sorriso bobo no rosto, piscou algumas vezes antes de responder:

— Acho... acho que eu vou... cantar pra ela!

Todo mundo canta junto:

— Ele vai dar uma cantada


Na barata dela,


Ele vai dar uma cantada


Na barata dela…

A festa continuou com Bruno tentando se adaptar às peculiaridades brasileiras, sempre recebendo dicas de você e rindo das situações em que se metia. Ele ainda arriscou uma tentativa de sambar junto com sua tia, o que resultou em mais risadas e mais uma rodada de caipirinhas.

Finalmente, quando a noite caiu e a festa começava a se acalmar, Bruno estava sentado ao seu lado no sofá, a cabeça encostada no seu ombro, os olhos meio fechados.

— Esse foi o melhor dia de todos — Ele murmurou, a voz arrastada.

— Acho que você gostou mesmo, hein? — Você respondeu, acariciando os cabelos dele.

— Eu gostei tanto... Mas acho que vou precisar de ajuda para subir as escadas — Ele confessou, rindo baixinho.

Você riu junto e o ajudou a levantar. Com cuidado, conduziu-o até o quarto onde vocês ficariam, ele tropeçando de leve, mas sempre com um sorriso no rosto. Ao deitá-lo na cama, ele puxou você para perto.

— Eu te amo, sabia? — Ele disse, de olhos fechados, antes de cair em um sono profundo.

— Eu também te amo, Bruno. E vou te amar ainda mais amanhã, quando acordar com essa ressaca. — Você responde, rindo baixinho enquanto ele fecha os olhos, já meio adormecido.

Enquanto ele dormia, você não pôde deixar de imaginar as histórias que contariam sobre aquele dia, sobre a caipirinha que quase derrubou o Bruno Mars.

[tf2heritageposts]

There is: (i got too excited and it's a bit long sorry)

What kind of brazillian foods/drinks the mercs would like the most

Scout:

He would love any kinds of street foods, his favorite ones would be coxinha, a fried snack stuffed with chicken; Hot dogs in the São Paulo way, they usually have mashed potatoes, corn, peas and shoestring potatoes above (with ketchup and mustard, of course) and pastel, a fried dough (the texture is similar to a puff pastry) that can have many kinds of fillings, the most usual one is mozzarella cheese. He also would love eat this while drink sugarcane juice (it's a classical combo).

Soldier:

This one is funny, bc in my head all the other mercs had to lie to him that they were getting 100% american food so he could at least try some, and he keep eating it without knowing the thruth. His favorite ones would also be ones of the most iconical ones, by irony of the destiny, such as feijoada and pão de queijo. He would also love farofa (is made either with corn or cassava, braised with oil and can have diverses other igredients too) but since Soldier is build diferently, insted of eating it as a side dish he just cook a huge ass pan of farofa and eat all of it with a spoon.

Pyro:

He would love brigadeiro, because is sweet as him (awwn). He would love churrasco (brazilian barbecue), so much that he, engineer and sniper would be the ultimate churrasqueiros of the team (however only engineer and sniper are alowed to touch on the grill since the incident). From the many things that can be made in a churrasco, Pyro likes garlic bread the most (because it gets burned at outisde really quickly but still ok to eat). The last thing from his list would be cuscuz paulista, recipe that blend corn flour and many other igredients, and that people from other brazilian states keep saying its ugly but THATS UNTRUE YALL JUST DONT KNOW HOW TO MAKE IT - me, a sad paulistana.

Engineer:

As said before, he would love churrasco, and any kind of red meat should be his favorite (picanha, striploin…). He would also like the local beer options and condensed milk pudding (pudim). No special rasion on the last one (besides giving all the mercs at least 3 itens).

Demoman:

He would LOVE drinking cachaça (alchoolic drink made with sugarcane) and caipirinha as well (drink made with cachaça, lime, sugar and ice). For eat, his favorite food should be torresmo (pork skin with fat cut into small pieces and fried until crispy), that is also a good side dish in brazilian bar's.

Heavy:

His first favorite option would be estrogonofe, wich is actually a brazilian version of a russian recipe (stroganoff), with some alterations. He would also enjoy virado à paulista (plate composed of a beans and cassava flour mix, together with pork chop, tuscan sausage, fried egg, braised cabbage and a piece of breaded banana), it's a really big meal to a really big guy. Finally, he would go for "caipiroska" for drinking, with is a caipirinha variation but with vodka in the place of cachaça (wich i didn't know existed until i started writing this kkkkkk)

Medic:

Cuca de banana (a cake with bananas and a sugar & cinnamon on top) would be one of his favorite desserts (it also has a germanic origin i also didn't knew kkkkkk). He also would like specific foods from Bahia, such as Acarajé (dumpling made from black-eyed pea dough, onion and salt, and fried in palm oil, can be stuffed with shrimp or other options of filling) and cocada (candy made with coconut), but I can't specify why yet bc it envolves a headcanon/AU i'm still making and i want it to be a silly surprise, i'll edit here once it's done.

Sniper:

The last one of the ultimate churrasqueiros, his favorite item would be chiken's hearts. Aparently pumpkings are very used in australian culinary, so i like to imagine he would also like doce de abobora (dessert made with pumpking). Finally, i guess tapioca (cassava gum, can be fried like a pancake and stuffed to taste, among other uses) just suits him idk.

Spy:

He would love Carolina (looks like a éclair, but is smaller, rounder, and filled with dulce de leche) and sonho (fried dough, usualy filled with vanilla cream and with sprinkled sugar above. The name of this recipe translate to "dream" in a literal form btw kkkkk). Ending this list, Spy would enjoy queijo com goiabada (a slice of minas cheese thogeter with a slice of guava paste).

Thank you for reading until here, and sorry if i made you fell hungry hihihi

holy shit this is so good

also i want carolina that looks so good

i also want the sugarcane drinks, please god i’ll do anything

[v-anrouge]

Do you have a particular favorite Brazilian dish or recommendation for someone who's never had Brazilian food? Finally have some time to cook for myself and want to expand my pallet (bonus points if spicy food)

ok i must make you aware u asked the worst brazilian for this because i rarely go out so my experience with brazilian food is the food I used to eat when i used to go out 🙏🙏 brazilian friends im sorry for being such a bad rep

my fav food is a brazilian dish called empada (ou empadinha) ive seen a few gringos describe it as similar to a chicken pot pie but i can't really confirm or deny that now if we're talking like brazilian food that we have for lunch and dinner there's obv the classics like feijoada (esp if u choose to make the feijoada combo which includes churrasco, farofa and vinagrete) there's another classic the estrogonofe, churrasco by itself is good but like eating it with other things is way way better, there's also multiple ways to make rice in brazil for an example the baião de dois, arroz carreteiro, etc if you'd like to pair it up with something that isn't just white rice. my grandma used to make something that i absolutely loved it was frango com quiabo (chicken with okra) it was so good seriously I miss it 😿

the classic cuscuz if ur looking for foods that we eat as breakfast or during the afternoon lunch (café da tarde) there's also tapioca, bolo de fubá, pão de queijo, carrot cake with brigadeiro, corn cake, there's also like something it's a bit like a cinnamon roll i guess? but instead of cinnamon it's topped with condensed milk and coconut and it's absolutely delicious i forgot the name though 😭 there's also sonho which i really like though that's more something you'd buy at a bakery than make at home ig

FOR SPICY FOOD surprisingly , brazil isn't a country that eats super spicy food, our food is well seasoned but like not a lot of ppl eat super spicy food, obvi, there's certain regions of Brazil where this changes and spicy food is very very common however i am from são paulo, so we don't have that here💀💀 the most i can think of is acarajé (which is delicious I super recommend) but unfortunately to find more spicy brazilian food you'll have to ask a person from the southeast <\3 ERM this is really long and im starting to wonder if it's actually any help at all help me but here's a list of 100 brazilian dishes homie<\3

[kyuala]

Penso muitíssimo no Simón Hempe tendo um filhinho de 4/5 anos com a namorada dele e levando o moleque (que é a cópia dele) para todos os lugares que ele vai 😔

Vai jogar uma peladinha com os amigos? Leva o filho! Vai pra praia desentressar? Lá vai eles dois. Vai andar de skate? O Simón vai ensinar as manobras mais radicais ao bebê 🤰🏻💭

MEU DEUSSSSS AMG VC FOI LUZ pq acho isso a CARA dele!!! e ele ainda ia ficar tão feliz do mlk ser a miniatura dele 😭 ia vestir o filho sempre no estilo dele, talvez não com roupas iguais, mas sempre combinando, dá pra ver que o menino foi vestido pelo pai. e ia ficar felizão da vida vendo o bichinho ter orgulho disso, pegando todos os trejeitos do simón 🤧 vc bufaria e reclamaria (brincando) que a mãe carrega 9 meses na barriga pra acontecer isso e ele só daria risada e falaria "gene do pai é forte, num tem jeito" 🙅🏽‍♂️

morrendo aqui pensando no simón carregando esse menino que é o orgulho e felicidade dele pra cima e pra baixo: levaria pro fut, pra praia, andar de skate, pra casa de parente, pro churrasco dos amigos, pro samba, até pra ir na padaria buscar pão ele arrumaria o menino e levaria junto 🤧 meu deus quero um filho dele q tristeza

[tastygoldentaters]

What's your favourite food?

you're my top social enrichment mutual, did you know that?

thank you ;-;

anyway. I couldn't pick just one, so here's a list of my favourites in no specific order:

mochi pringles haribo gummy bears churrasco gyoza macarons (but only TRUE macarons, made with almond flour, none of that wheat flour bullshit) pão de queijo moqueca de camarão cozido ice cream

I'm sorry I just love food

[sunrise-things]

Que bom que voltou meu bem. Entendo bem como é, eu graças a Deus já fiz a maioria das provas, mas na outra semana ainda tem duas, apresentei um trabalho semana passada e foi muito legal, até fizemos uma espécie de “teatro”, interpretando uma sessão de terapia, bem legal, curti muito.

 A sim, entendi, você deu mole nessa então kkkk, e que azar também. Confesso que eu não acharia essa história muito convincente, mas que bom que conseguiu inventar alguma coisa, eu não faço ideia do que falaria, com certeza eu ia me ferrar. Nossa, muito legal, fico feliz demais por ter encontrado alguém assim, que fizesse isso por você, tenho certeza que ele te ama, e isso de certa forma me conforta. 

 Que legal que mudou o horário, parece ser bom, eu adoraria que o meu fosse assim. Uma pena eu não chegar no escritório mais cedo, porque aí a gente podia se ver, mas geralmente às 7:20 é a hora que estou acordando kkkkk, não me julgue. Estou torcendo pra que tenha dado boa, mesmo que não passe, com certeza foi uma experiência legal. Eu estou de olho em vagas, e concursos, meu sonho é conseguir um emprego em que tenha uma carga horária legal e um salário bom, mas não é fácil.

Mas já parou, durou bastante né kkkkk. Entendo, realmente qualquer tempo a mais pra dedicar aos estudos faz diferença, eu estou tentando me organizar pra conseguir estudar.

Realmente, tem que ter muita força de vontade para cozinhar todos os dias a noite, mas eu estou conseguindo, às vezes eu almoço em um restaurante que tem pertinho do meu serviço, bem baratinho e muito bom. Não acredito que comeu pão no almoço kkkk, não faça isso com você meu bem. O dia que quiser vir jantar, pode vir, te mostro meus dotes culinários e faço um bife acebolado com batata frita, que é considerado por mim mesmo o melhor da região. Nossa, eu sou assim, adoro carne, churrasco, faz algum tempo que não vou numa churrascaria, preciso ir, é muito bommm.

Realmente, dificilmente vou conseguir uma vaga dessas com um salário bom, mas tô atento a novas oportunidades, porque realmente tô me sentindo muito infeliz no meu emprego atual, está me consumindo. Sim, também estou torcendo pra esse mês ser bom, afinal realmente é o meu mês, tô ficando velho já, falta exatamente uma semana. Nossa, você lembra de mim com 15 anos? Já me conhecia? Bons tempos né.

Vou te deixar curiosa por mais um tempo, em algum momento vou conseguir te contar, relaxa.

Nossa, que triste e trágico. Mas que bom que vai ganhar uma, estou pensando nos nomes, assim que achar um legal eu te falo aqui, espero que coloque mesmo.

Tá Bom, estou no aguardo pra ver os resultados, vamos ver se tem talento. Eu acho que você está dando uma desculpa pra não lavar a louça, que bonito ein, ta precisando de uma ajuda ai? Meu deus, que rotina, eu admiro muito o seu esforço, tenho certeza que isso vai agregar bastante na sua carreira profissional, eu queria ser igual você, imagino o quão inteligente e preparada está se tornando, que orgulho.

 Fui pra casa dos meus pais esse fim de semana, peguei ônibus e fui daqui até lá, sentado junto com a sua amiga, conversamos muito, sobre muitas coisas, e infelizmente nenhum assunto foi sobre você,  não sei se ela chegou a te contar?  Também vi seu pai sábado kkkk, ele me cumprimentou, não sei se lembra de mim ainda, acho que sim. 

 Estou triste, porque meus amigos vão todos pro beto carreiro e eu não vou conseguir ir por conta do trabalho kkk, minha namorada também vai então irei ficar sozinho, ser pobre é muito ruim kkkkk, mas pelo menos vou poder dar um ar pra mente. Vou ter que ir sábado a tarde pra casa dos meus pais, por que vai ter a porra de um treinamento la no meu trabalho e vou ter que ficar, que raiva. 

 Estou deitadinho, acabei de tomar um açaí, e agora vou tentar dormir. Obrigado por estar aqui, prometo contar mais novidades na próxima, se cuida meu bem, estarei sempre por aqui! Ainda que seja muito difícil, eu espero por sua volta todos os dias

-Ainda te encontro em todos os meus sonhos…

[panzershrike-pretz]

Hello mon amie!! I was interested, what’s some things you love about your country and culture?!

HEY LOUUUUUU!!! SORRY IT TOOK ME LIKE 2 MONTHS TO REMEMBER THIS!!! TIME TO YELL ABOUT BRAZIL!!

This will be long so have a read more

----------------------------------------------

- Food

A thing I notice whenever a gringo comes here id how they seem to love our food! We're very set on a good meal (normally rice, beans, meat and some sort of salad, It's a very common thing to find on the table of any brazilian at lunch or dinner), but we also have some more region specific foods! And we are damn PROUD of our stuff!

I LOVE FOOD! AND ABOVE ALL, THESE ONES! In order, they are: coxinha, pastel, pamonha, brigadeiro, pão de queijo, beijinho, feijoada, farofa e churrasco! Lemme talk a bit about them:

- Coxinha -> it's made out of shredded chicken amd enveloped into a dough, then fried and I SWEAR this is the best thing ever! When I was small, my aunt owned a food place and after I helped her around, she'd pay me with coxinhas xD it was lovely

- Pastel -> similarly to the coxinha, it's a tasty interior made out of whatever you want (can be cheese, any meat, veggies, fish or even chocolate and fruits!) and a crust. It's crunchy and I love it! You can buy the crust pretty much in any market (or make it at home) and then fill it up with whatever you want! After that, it's just fry and enjoy!

- Pamonha -> it's a boiled paste made out of corn and apparently coconut milk! It's enveloped on the corn's own husk and it can be sweet or not! One day, my auntas came together to make a GIANT batch of pamonha and I swear it was one of the cooles experiences ever! Pamonha is also a thing we use to call dumb people, tho xD

- Brigadeiro -> AUDHBRJWJW I LOVE IT!!! It's prettymuch homemade (you'll need butter, condensed milk and cocoa powder, then sprinkled chocolate to cover it up if you want!). It's sweet and good and normally can be seen in any birthday party (it's victim of the biggest trafficking scheme in the world called Hungry Children, and it's highly effective until an adult gets you sneaking brigadeiro from the food table at the party. I was a big trafficker).

- Pão de Queijo -> THE beloced cheese bread! I have no clue how it'sz made but I know it's fucking amazing, i'll tell you that!!

- Beijinho -> the name translates to little kiss!! It's like the brigadeiro, also a birthday party sweet, made out of condenses milk, grated coconut and rolled over either sugar or coconut! It's less sweet than brigadeiro but just as good! Sometimes, it's topped off with a clove, too, but you don't need to eat that xD

- Feijoada -> a stew of beans with beef and/or pork (sometimes veggies as well), served with farofa (more on this one down bellow), rice and other stuff.

- Farofa -> tasty sand. Litterally. It's made from toasted cassava. It can be found in any narket but also can be made at home! (My mom makes the best one with bacon 😭). It's not meant to be eaten alone as it's salty and fucking hard to swallow without something kind of moist!! It can be used alongside the feijoada, churrasco or even on your normal sunday family lunch siting common beans and rice!

- Churrasco -> I don't care if other countries have barbecue as well, nothing will ever top off south-brazilian bbq!! It's meat and garlic bread and it's ducking amazing????? Any kind of beef, sausages (either pig or chicken), chicken wings, chicken hearts, sometimes veggies, garlic bread! All of tgis. Together. IT'S THE BEST THING!!! My family has these almost every weekend and I love it so much! Now add lemonade?????? THE MEAT IS SO WELL SEASONED AS WELL LIKE!! GARLIC, ONION, A LOT OF STUFF THAT GIVES IT SUCH A GOOD TASTE AND IT NEVER IS DRY!!

This was me going crazy over my favorite foods :3 obviously there are others like acarajé, açaí and a lot of other stuff from the upper states, but I never had them so I can't give an opinion xD

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- Language

I'm entireky convinced that the brazilian portuguese is the best portuguese and funniest fucking language I ever saw. Maybe because is the only other one I speak but who knows KAKSKSKSK

I like our words. Compared to english and some other languages, I feel like portuguese is more soft spoken? I may be crazy but like... i get the vibe of that.

Our sayings are lovely and funny, especially when you're watching foreign movies with the brazilian dub (God bless Surf's Up). Here are some pf my favorite sayings and sounds and whatever!

- "Bah" -> common here on the south, can be used for pretty much anything, even as punctuation. It can mean whatever your heart desires depending on context (Bah...; bah.; bah???; BAH!; bah, [...]; I promise all of these mean different things and there's more that can only be use when soeaking irl xD). I use the bah all the time and I'm sure you saw it KSKSSKKS

- "Hit it waith a dead cat 'till it meows" -> I dare you to find a better way to say you're gonna shove some sense into a person. There isn't. This is my fave saying

- "Pila" -> our currency is called real (good ol' R$). But fuck me if you'll see a brazilian saying "i've got 10 reais". You'll see us saying "I've got 10 pila" (or "10 pau", can be that too. Pau can mean either wood or dick tho so use at your own risk. I laugh everytime I see the word pau :D)

- "Shove a set of teeth up your ass and smile to a dick" -> I think nothing needs to be said here, right?

- "To make the asshole fall from your ass" -> when something is unbelievable, I think. I love it :3 (de cair o cu da bunda, in portuguese)

- "É foda..." -> don't know how to answer anything? É foda... "Fulano, my friend got into a car accident!", "...é foda...".

AND WHILE ON LANGUAGE! Accents!!! I love accents and I think my favorite is the accent from Nordeste (or at least Ceará), tho I absolutely love our South accent (especially Rio Grande do Sul).

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- Fauna

Surprise surprise! I like animals!! I bet ya didn't know 'bout that one, did you?????? I don't think so!

In order: southern-lapwing (quero-quero), toucan (tucano), harpy eagle (harpia), sunbittern (pavãozinho-do-pará), potoo (urutau), brazilian tanager (tiê-sangue), oven-bird (João-de-barro), caracara (carcará), jabiru (tuiuiú).

DID YOU KNOW, the Harpy eagle is the largest species of eagle? Their talons can go from 8.6 to 12.3 cm (3.4 to 4.8 inches). They grab sloths out of trees like they weight nothing. Their paws are the hugest fucking thing???????? Fucking scary

Yes the lapwing has claws on its wings. Yes they are extremely agressive and territorial. Yes you SHOULD fear them.

In order: golden lion tamarin (mico-leão-dourado), tapir (anta), giant-anteater (tamanduá-bandeira), maned wolf (lobo-guará), bush-dog (cachorro-do-mato), ring-tailed coati (coati), jaguar (onça-pintada), marsh deer (cervo-do-pantanal), giant river otter (ariranha)

OK I NEED TO TALK A BIT ABOUT THEM!! You gave me the chance >:3

So you know the jaguar??? Good ol' big fucking cat? Yeah that bitch hunts crocodiles. They fucking love swimming and climbing. And do you know how those bitches kill crocs??? Giant fucking bite on their brains. Those FUCKERS kill CROCODILES with a bite ON THEIR HEADS

LOOK AT THIS???? ONE BITE. ONE. FUCKING. BITE. AND THE CROC IS DEAD.

Anyway wanna know about the ariranhas too? THEY SQUARE UP TO THE JAGUAR. THE SAME THING THAT KILLS ON A HEAD BITE. AND THEY'RE AGGRESSIVE TOO????? THEY CAN AND WILL ATTACK CROCODILES AND HUMANS IF NEEDED. THEY EAT PIRANHAS. THEY ARE SCARY.

Look at that face and tell me it doesn't look like a demon, I dare you.

YOU KNOW WHO ELSE SQUARES UP TO THE JAGUAR????? THAT ANTEATER. THEY OPEN THEIR ARMS LIKE RHE REDEMER AND PEI. FUCKING SLAPPED WITH GIANT CLAWS. Brazilian animals are a menace, lucky they live far from me <3 (i love them sooo muchhhhahrjqishsj)

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- The Views

Especially nature, man... this country us so unbelievably pretty. The beaches, the forests, the cities, everything... i love it so damn much. And it's not only Rio de Janeiro. In fact, there are much better, prettier and safer places.

In order: Blumenau (SC), Praia do Rosa (SC), Salvador (BH), Fortaleza (CE), Monte Roraima (RR), Floresta Amazônica, Gramado (RS), Tiradentes (MG), Caatinga

Look at all of this... omg those places are fucking amazing!!

Did you know the caatinga exists only in Brazil? Yep! We're original xD

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- Folklore

NOW I LOVE THIS!! SO MUCH!!!!!! FUCK!! WE HAVE SO MANY LEGENDS AND FOLKLORIC CREATURES! I'll talk a bit about them!

- Cuca -> A witch with the head of a crocodile known gor kidnapping kids! Shess became famous thanks to Monteiro Lobato, in a book (and went on to be the villain in a kid's show called Sítio do Pica-pau Amarelo. She's sometimes compared to the bicho-papão (same vibe of kidnapping and eating misbehaving kids).

- Boto-cor-de-rosa -> I already talked about this one but it's always fun to bring him up again! Legends says that at night, an extremely seductive man comes out of the waters to sleep with young girls. By the morning he flees,leaving them pregnant. Yeah, he's an amazonian river dolphin. It's a story told when girls appeared pregnant and din't want to tell the truth.

- rasga-mortalha -> rasga-mortalha (a.k.a. barn-owl) is a pretty common legend that says that when the owl flies over someone's house, someone there will soon die. She got the name rasga-mortalha because when she emits her sound, it's like when you rip that thing used to cover dead people on funerals (mortalha).

- Mula-sem-cabeça -> the headless mule is a popular one as well! It's a common mule but, in place of it's head, it has flames. One of the legends behind her is that if a woman had sexual relations with a priest, she'd be cursed and turned into the monster. When I was a kid, a common game was to race and say that the last one would be the priest's wife, meaning you'd turn into a headless mule.

- Boitatá -> a giant serpent of fire who protects the forest and it's animals against people that treat them badly. Some legends say that whoever looks at a boitatá turns blind and goes insane.

- Curupira -> a small boy with fiery red hair and feet turned backwards! They are protectors of the forests and some native people said they went after anyone who went inside a forest to hunt or deforest. Some even used to left gifts for the curupira in order to freely hunt!

- Caipora -> sometimes confused with thes corupira, the caipora is a mischievous animal protector who'd go after hunters who didn't respect the rules of hunting fairly (who took more than needed).

- Saci -> a black and mischievous boy with only one leg, that smokes a pipe and weaars a red hat that gives him magical powers. He's a playful boy that does pranks on people and their animals, like: braiding animal's fur at night, hide objects, change the salt and sugar pots, distract women so they burn the food and those kinds of things! He's also a guardian of medicinal herbs and confounds people that tryvto take them without his blessing. They can also moove in a tornado.

Those are only some of the brazilian legends, and I find them extremely cool! Obviously there are many others, but these ones are the most common and loved!