#our grand plan to change the world by changing absolutely nothing at all

[juney-blues]

it's simple, see, we just have to never hold our allies up to any kind of standard because they'll stop being allies with us the moment it becomes even slightly inconvenient for them

[quimichi]

₊❏❜ ⋮ MEETING THEIR FAMILIES -HEARTSLABYUL VER.

warnings: bad treatment towards reader (Riddles part), bad writing :3

summary: You meet their families

characters: Heartslabyul x F!Reader

word count:

a/n: I originally planned to do all in one part but I decided not to since it's so so much and I'm currently having a writers block but I wanna make you guys happy so-its in parts :(

Riddle

Riddle's mother is a strict woman, and she does not hide her dislike for you. She frowns the moment she sees you and crosses her arms. The situation is tense as she watches you, her gaze sharp and unblinking. She seems to be considering your motives with her son, but it is clear that she has a low opinion of you for some reason.

Riddle is nothing compared to her; he has no power, he's weak standing beside you. Yet, he stands proud, he loves you and no matter what his mother will say, his mind won't change. "Mother," he begins. She shoots a hard look at him. With that stare, she seems to say 'do. not. talk."

Riddle goes silent. He knows that if he does talk, it might ruin her approval...if that will ever happen. But you decided to speak up, nervously, "It's a pleasure to finally meet you! Riddle has told me so many lovely things of you!" you bow down, showcasing your respect. His mother's expression does not change. She seems to consider you for a while before speaking:

"Do you think yourself worthy of my son? Do you think you are a good match for him?"

It's clear that she is sizing you up, and her gaze is piercing.

"Yes." Riddle grabs your hand and gives it a tight squeeze. Showing you his support, no matter what he won't back out either, cause he knows whats coming. Your words only draw a frown from his mother. Her expression turns sour.

"I do not think you can give my son the life he deserves. You are too low class for a nobleman. It is clear why you would date him, but what do you have to offer us? It would disgrace his name and our family to wed a commoner. A magicless commoner!" She continues to size you up. She is relentless. Her frown only hardens with every passing moment.

"My son is a nobleman. He deserves a woman of nobility. Riddle dear, I know the perfect girl for you she-" "No!" His voice rings through the halls with booming thunder.

"How dare you," he shouts, his eyes like daggers. He looks as though every muscle is about to tense up so hard it'll burst. "She is good enough. She is worthy of my love. There is no one in this world who I will ever love and admire more! If you don't agree with this relationship then-!...Then I might just leave.

Riddle is standing protectively in front of you now. His heart is thrumming so hard he can feel each pulse. His last words were spoken unsure, timidly, but it's the truth.

"...Then do."

Trey

Trey's parents are thrilled to meet you. The moment they saw you at their doorstep, they took you into their family. They are gracious hosts, offering you food and drinks as soon as you step into the house. Everything is warm and welcoming. Not to mention the cake they baked for you!

The afternoon tea goes smoothly, with conversation flowing as easily as a river. "Again, thank you so much for the tea and cake! It was absolutely delicious!" "It was nothing," Trey's mother says as she refills your mug. She smiles warmly, keeping herself composed with effort. She has heard a lot about you, after all, and the impression she has received so far has been wonderful. Its hard for her to contain her pure excitement, she might explode. All her husband can do is calm her down with a hand on her shoulder, smiling both at you and his wife.

Trey doesn't dare say anything, his lips pressed shut in a smile as he watches from his place. He doesn't want to draw attention to himself, content to watch you and his parents interact.

"BROTHER!" You hear two voices yell from the hallway...seems his siblings arrived from school. Trey's young siblings finally make their grand entrance, their voices filling the room with an unexpected cacophony of excitement and joy. The scene is a chaotic one, but in a good way.

His younger brother runs up to you immediately, "Oh-Oh-! You're the pretty girl-!" Before you can question anything his sister also tunes in, "Ohhh-! She really does look as sweet as gum drops-!" "You two, shush immediately-! I'm so sorry-!" Trey's mother apologizes for the behavior of her youngest children, but you shake it off. How could you ever be upset about the honesty of those sweethearts. You definitely will have a word with Trey once you get back...

Cater

Cater never kept it a secret, how much he despises his sisters and mother sometimes. More than once he told you stories. But he has also told you that slowly, the relationship gets better...slowly.

Cater's mother is especially overbearing. She tries her best, but she seems almost incapable of not adding only their favorite sweets to the tablem. She is a bundle of nerves, and she often dotes on Cater. It's as if she finds comfort in treating him like a child, because he is so quiet and calm. Yeah, quite and calm, if only they knew who he truly was.

"Thank you so much for having me." a genuine smile sets on your lips as she pours tea into your cup. "We are so glad to have you," Cater's mother says with genuine warmth.

His sisters continue to prod you in both questions and comments, being too forceful and tactless at times. They think they're being endearing and curious, but don't quite realize that they're over stepping. Cater sits beside you, his eyes darting back and forth as the questions keep flowing. Hes annoyed, of course they will ask inappropriate questions and take the attention.

"Where was the first kiss?" "Ohhh my god did he use his tounge?" "Cater, your hair today looks frizzy." "You look cute but...that top with those jeans...i don't know. Cater you should really watch what your girlfriend wears!" "Yeah! Spend some money on her, damn." "Bad boyfriend."

The constant barrage of questions and comments from his sisters would make even the most stoic people wither. You are not one of those people - you are more patient than you ever realized. You smile through the barrage of words, answering most that you can, ignoring the rest. It hurts, some hurt. You get Cater now to 100%. Your calm demeanor and soft eyes would calm anyone's heart, but his sisters are a bit too persistent, their endless questioning seeming to have no end.

This goes on for some time, until Cater is visibly agitated. "Stop," he says under his breath. He is usually calm and collected, so it draws everyone's attention, even his mother's. "What?" One of his sisters finally asks, feigning innocence.

"Enough," he says simply, but his tone is enough to get them to back off.

He takes a few breaths before giving his mother and sisters a smile. The situation diffuses, but you can sense that he is annoyed. "I just wanted to introduce you to my girlfriend, we didnt came here for an interview. Her outfit is perfect, and I'm NOT a bad boyfriend! I know I'm not..."

Ace

Ace's older brother is charming, witty, and well-liked by everyone. He teases his little brother without any cruelty, making lighthearted jokes at his expense. He is very protective of Ace, he just wants his little brother to be happy. And obviously he wants him to behave in this relationship too.

"He has spoken of you a lot," the older brother comments, his tone teasing. His brother wiggles his eyebrows towards him,  "A bit too much, it seems," Ace says, keeping his voice low, but you hear the annoyance.

"I can't help but hear all about you whenever he's calling me... how much he cares for you, how he's so lucky to have you..." his brother's tone is good-natured. He's just having fun, and hes so glad his brother found true happiness. "Ohh, what else did you say?" Ace can hear the teasing in your voice, no way you're going into this too. "Shut up-!" "Oh, you know," the older brother laughs. "He says you are the sweetest, most beautiful being in the whole wide world. You're an angle with the patience you have for him. He would do anything for you without a second thought. He swears he has never loved another as he has you."

"What a mushy little guy my brother can be," his older brother says, sounding amused.

Ace is turning red. His voice comes out slightly strained, cracking. "I-! I NEVER-! Shut up I never said anything like that, that's way to sappy!" "Mhmmmm, sure bro, sure" His older brother smiles, genuinely.

"I've never seen him so happy," he says, "He's truly a good guy, he just has some rough edges. I'm glad someone like you took their time to get to know him...Take care of him for me."

Deuce

His mother beams. "Oh! This is the one you've been telling me about? You've done well. She is a beauty!"

Deuce's face is tomato red. He is the picture of nervousness, his eyes darting about the room with his mouth clamped shut for fear that he will say too much or too little. His mother's enthusiastic and effusive approach is overwhelming him. He wants to sink into the floor, damning himself for telling his mother and grandmother about you so much. "We are so delighted to have you here. Please," his mother continues, offering you her seat. "Sit, sit! No need to stand around!"

She smiles widely at you as she gestures to a plush chair across from them. A low table separates you, and the three of you are arranged across from one another. Deuce's grandmother walks slowly behind his mother, bearing a tray of tea and pastries in her hands. Without a word, she sits down and quietly offers one of the small cakes to you.

She doesn't take her eyes away from you, smiling wide. You can't help but smile back at her, but before you can thank her she leans closer to Deuce mother. "Perfect aren't they? I knew someone wil eventually see that our Deuce is a catch." She wasn't as discreet as she thought she was, but you can only agree with her, Deuce is a catch.

"Thank you so much-!" "It's nothing, dear," she says, her voice soft as velvet. His mother breaks the silence, leaning forward in her seat. "Now then, tell us all about yourselves. We have heard plenty from our son, but we want to hear from you."

Deuce is paralyzed. He has nothing ready to say. His mouth is dry and his heart is pounding in his chest. Although he is more than happy both his most loved family members love you, he is still nervous. It's embarrassing! "Wait-!" His grandmother immediately stands up from her seat. She disappears and reappears with a thick photo album. She settles back down and opens it.

"Now, let me show you my handsome boy when he was young. I think this is a much better idea!"

Deuce's head falls back, someone kill him. His heart stops at the pictures of himself....fuck...he's naked....

[ananashart]

"You're going to miss the falling stars if you keep looking at me"

Remus Lupin x Hufflepuff!Reader

Summary: On winter break the sky reserves a surprise for you. Or, Remus and You sneaking out of Hogwart at night.

Word count: 3 488

CW: the grammar is dead / eng isn't my first language

Quick note: I wrote that for a friend of mine who's a Hufflepuff, hence the Hufflepuff!reader. I wrote while knowing absolutely nothing about Harry Potter, haven't watched the movies nor read the books. My only knowledge on this Wizarding world is what I searched, what I was told and the little time I played hogwart mystery on my phone to kill some time (Charlie Weasley my beloved) to say I deeply apologize if some things seem out of place or even worse, occ. But if this can be comforting, my friend validate the os, even saying it seemed like I knew the universe.

The small white dots falling from the sky indicated that winter had arrived, and with it, so did winter break. Students of all years had prepared their belongings for the two weeks off the school. But not you. You weren't going back home for the holiday. At the beginning of December, you had received your monthly letter from home, the same one indicating that your family was facing troubles and other issues you didn't have the heart to be a part of. Which was why, while writing your answer, you had decided to not go back this year. Preferring to stay at Hogwart to focus on your magic studies. That had been your best lie of the year.

To you the situation was kind of sad, you wanted to go home as you were feeling nostalgic and pretty homesick. A hint of regret was settling within you, you were going to miss out on most of your family, ones you hadn't seen in a long time. Worse, you were going to miss out on your parents’ homemade Christmas cake, and that was the real tragedy of it all. The happy faces of your cousins, aunts and uncles flashing before your eyes.

Alone in your dorm room, swinging on your chair, you let a sigh cross your lips. You were bitter, bored and in need of a change. So you put on your shoes as well as your black and yellow scarf around your neck, while you gathered your book in your arms.

Each of your steps was echoing against the stone walls of the almost empty castle. It was eerie, in a good way, how empty the chilly corridors were. Everything seemed higher, more grand, nearly intimidating and scary.

Readjusting your scarf, you walked to your favorite spot near the Quidditch pitch, behind an old tree. Since your first year, the place had strangely grown on you. It was calm but not silent, perfect for you. So naturally, needing a change of scenery you went there, as you slowly but certainly grew tired of the dorm wall. Setting a foot outside, you immediately get hit by a swirl of fresh air, filling your lungs, making you feel instantly better.

Luckily for you, it wasn't snowing at the moment nor raining. It was just wendy and cold. Arriving at the old tree, you settled yourself, putting down an old blanket you had used previously for picnics with friends. In all truth, you had half lied in your letter, you really wanted to get some work done. And the peace and quiet the place was offering was the best way to achieve it. And quicker than ever, you engulfed yourself in your books.

It took the abrupt crack of a twig to tear you out of your head space, making you aware of your surroundings again. Too immersed in the book you were reading, you didn't hear the three Gryffindors coming your way. Being on the other side of the tree, they didn't know you were there as well.

"Why come here when you could've told us your oh so great plan in our dorm?” Had questioned one of the three, sarcasm dripping from their lips.

"Because people can snitch on us.” Answered another voice like it was the most obvious thing to exist. “And I don't want this old bag of Filch to hear us.”

Putting your book aside, you tried to concentrate on the different persons on the other side of the tree. You couldn't quite place the voices, but that wasn't the first time you were hearing them, you were sure of that. Furthermore, the mention of a ‘great plan’ made you curious, very curious. You knew you shouldn't be eavesdropping, but that plan, whatever it was, had picked your interest.

“So? What's your plan?” Inquired a third person, more calm and composed than the other two.

“Let's sneak out tonight, and go to Hogsmeade.”

The silence was deafening, but to you the idea was an interesting one. It would be lying saying you had never dreamed of exploring Hogsmeade and the surroundings at night.

"Sneak out to go to Hogsmeade? Like we do almost every month.” Taunted the first person who had spoken. “ Really Sirius?"

When the name dropped, everything clicked in your mind. Sirius, like the famous Sirius Black. Which meant the other two were James Potter and Remus Lupin. The troublemakers Gryffindor trio. However, at the back of your head, you were sure someone was missing. You couldn't replace his name. Not that it was important anyway, you had a more pressing matter at hand; the boy with the scars across his face.

You were familiar with the trio, not that you were a part of their friend group no. You talked, here and there. You mostly conversed with Remus as you were sharing some classes with him. The first time you engaged, you had requested his help, not sure you had understood well a part in the transfiguration class.

“Why me?” He had uttered, hint of self-defense in his demeanor.

“I noticed how easy it seems for you.” You had simply answered, shrugging your shoulders. “Also, you pique my curiosity.”

You were being authentic, and knowing that someone was genuinely interested about him made a warm feeling spread through his entire body. So he gladly helped you. And the feeling intensified the next day, when during the lunch break, you boldly sat down next to him proposing to pull a mean joke on the dumb guy who had dared mock him in the morning.

The persons who were willing to get in trouble for him were few. He could count them on his right hand only.

It was the voice of Sirius that brought you back from the depth of your mind. “You didn't let me finish Prongs. I've heard the teachers say that something was going to appear in the sky tonight.” He exclaimed, excitement in his voice.

“Then why not just go to the astronomy tower?” Proposed Remus, calm as ever.

"Where's the fun in that Moony?" Answered Sirius, as a smirk was shaping his lips, you were sure of that.

Processing the new information, it was when James and Remus agreed on the plan that you decided to show yourself, standing up in a hurry. “Can I go with you?”

Your sudden appearance has the trio stuck in place, silent. “Y/N?” Had questioned the one you considered the most being your friend.

Nodding, a shadow of a small smile was dancing on your face. Looking at the two others, you saw how they carefully studied you, dissecting every parcel of your skin under their eyes.

It had been James who spoke first, while Sirius had, oddly enough, stayed silent one eyebrow raised. “You're spying on us.”

Their septic attitude was laughable, funny to you, considering how harmless you were. But you complied, explaining yourself to them why you had been hiding behind the tree. Not without forgetting to mention you had been there first.

“But about your little excursion?” You focused back on the discussion, the smile fully drawing your lips, almost showing your teeth.

“Well,” started Remus, turning to his friends for their approval. “I can't see why not.”

There was no reason for them to refuse, as you weren't one of the students they bullied nor a Slytherin. Furthermore you were friends with Remus, and they already knew you, quite well for that matter.

Sirius’ gaze went back and forth between Remus who smiled at him, and James who only shrugged his shoulders, agreeing. “Sure, whatever.”

With that settled, he continued to reveal the plan for tonight. It was fairly simple, sneaking out of your respective common rooms then meeting in front of the stairs to the fourth floor and going straight to the secret passage behind the mirror. Your only issue here was knowing how you were going to leave your dorm without getting caught. It was crystal clear to you that the boys were going to use Remus’ prefect status to get out without much trouble. But you choose to not voice your problems as you already felt like you were already imposing yourself to them. You didn't want to add more to the list.

Once the evening came, you all decided to eat together, chatting and gossiping about students and professors. Eventually, the discussion turned onto why the four of you were still here instead of back home.

“Everyone has their reasons.” Had said Sirius, a somber tone in his voice that no one dared questioned or pushed further.

Done with your meals, you all went back to your respective dorm. The boys' attempt at fooling everyone by waving at you goodnight had you wholeheartedly chuckling on your way back. It was your own way to distract you from the warmth in your cheeks, remembering Remus who had decided to throw you a knowing wink.

At the entrance of the common room, while automatically knocking rhythmically on the barrel, you searched through your mind every spell you knew that would help you sneak out. Why choose the curfew hours in the first place? It wasn't making a lot of sense to you. Why not do it while everyone was still eating, being busy with their meals. Those were questions for later, right away you needed a way out.

Inside, you made a beeline to your dorm room, preparing a small bag with what would eventually be useful for your night out. Looking around the room, your eyes lingered on one of your roommates bed, that was when it struck you. You were going to use their Dungbombs to have everyone hurrying out of the common room, and use the disorder at your advantage to disappear.

Once curfew hours hit, you got the case out from under your friend's bed, pinching your nose as best as you could before opening it. Quickly you gathered two Dungbombs in your hand, going to the common room to throw them. They were quick to diffuse their horrid smell, and quicker than ever, the remaining Hufflepuffs were out.

And just as expected, the ruckus was the perfect moment for you to leave. On your tiptoes, you kept your eyes on the crowd until the first turn. But you didn't get that far as your back bumped into someone. Turning around, you expected anyone but one of the Gryffindor prefects to be here. Luckily for you, it was none other than Remus Lupin.

Readjusting your bag on your shoulder, you jogged with him away from the possible prying eyes. You were surprised to see him here when he was supposed to wait at the stairs with Sirius and James. You didn't wait to question him.

“What are you doing here?” You whispered, “Not that I'm complaining.”

Your simple comment brought a smile to his face, instantly illuminating it. “I was worried, so I decided to come and wait here.” Looking around the corner for a few seconds, he continued, sparkles of mischief hiding in his eyes. “But I was worried for nothing, you handled the situation well.”

His smile was everything, and knowing he was suppressing a laugh made you wish he hadn't. You had heard him laugh a handful of times, it truly was music to your ears. You could never get tired of it.

“That's very sweet of you, but you left James and Sirius alone?” Watching realization drown onto him made you suppress a laugh on your own. “Not a very prefect attitude off of you dear Remus.”

“Let's hope they can behave themselves.” Hearing noises coming your way, the brunet took your hands in his, leading the both of you away. “But I have to admit that's pretty reckless of me. Which is why we better hurry.”

He was amused more than anything, peeking behind him to look at you. He was sublime, a dazzling smile you wanted to frame. You wish he could be this happy and free more often. Those were definitely feelings that were suiting him perfectly.

Carefully, you ran hidden in the shadows, only for the ghosts and awake painting to see your nightly escapade. All the way to the stairs, he never once let go of your hand. Strong and warm hand securely wrapped around your own, less calloused than what you could have expected. And somehow, it wasn't odd.

On his side, Remus was debating with his inner self. Was he supposed to let go of your hand? He didn't want to, but for all he knew you were uncomfortable. But surely if you were, you would have separated your linked hands a long time ago. That was the only reassuring argument he had found to keep your hand in his. It was a selfish action, the only one he wanted to keep doing. In all his turmoil, he could feel his cheeks getting warmer and warmer by the second.

After surviving each floor, you both finally reunited with the two impatient Gryffindors, waiting at the stairs.

Sirius, who had been previously pacing, stopped upon your arrival, throwing his hands to the sky. “Merlin, finally!” He almost shouted, earning a nasty look from James, who was sitting down at the beginning of the stairs.

Standing up, he dusted his trousers before starting his way to the fourth floor. “Come on, we're going to miss out on whatever is in the sky.”

Not needing to be told twice, Sirius followed shortly after, quickly joined by Remus and yourself. And before you knew it, you arrived in Hogsmeade.

The streets were faintly light, busy with people, more than usual. It was nothing new for the boys, but for you it was all very new. So you took in the scenery playing in front of you; the sweet smells in the air, the loud chatting of every passerby, the sudden heat hitting you.

The Gryffindors noticed right away it was your first time here at night. The sparks in your eyes alongside your silence being a huge give away for them. You were mesmerized. Knowing it was because of them made them feel kind of proud of themselves, exchanging knowing gaze at each other. The proudest of them all was most definitely Remus, an adoring look fighting to be seen in his eyes. At that moment, he only wanted to keep you close to him.

James' abrupt yelling brought everyone's attention back on track. “Now what?” He questioned, directed to Sirius.

"What do you mean now what?” He had questioned back, furrowed eyebrows, not sure about his friend's request. “We have fun, that's what."

"I think James wants to know about the sky event." You had intervened, taking a step toward them to be heard.

Remus, still by your side, wasn't listening at all. Too focused on the sensation of your hand still in his, he couldn't. It was a perfect fit, like his hands had been sculpted to be wrapped accurately around yours. He was supposed to be the most mature and responsible one of the group, he should be taking the lead, telling his two friends to not do anything stupid. But he wasn't. Too hypnotized by you and how you looked under Hogsmeade low light. Maybe the sirens of those Muggle's legends were real, and you were one of them. With the sole purpose to distract him from everything.

It was you pulling on his hand that broke his trance. "You're coming?" You asked, head slightly tilted to the side. It could have been an order, Remus would have followed all the same.

Walking through the crowd, you all watched for anything interesting. The two troublemakers in front, trying to get themselves in trouble, arguing about why going to the three broomsticks wasn't a good idea.

After some time, it was easy to see the crowd walking in the opposite direction from Hogwart. Kids, who should have probably been asleep, were running through the passerby, talking about ‘falling stars’. At that, you all exchanged a look before running along the kids, wanting to have a good place yourself to witness the event. That time, you had been the one leading the way for Remus. Weaving in and out of the crowd, hand in hand, like it had been since the start of the night.

Arriving at why you had gathered was the place, it was James who found a spot. It wasn't front row like you would all have wanted, but it was good enough to admire the night sky. The only thing left for you to do was to wait. A torture for Sirius, who had already started complaining about his neck hurting. Maybe going to the astronomy tower like Remus had suggested would have been better in the end.

But as soon as the few remaining lights on the streets were blown shut, you were able to see one dot running through the sky. Soon followed by another, and another, and a thousand others. They were all, indeed, falling. It was majestic. The four of you were fascinated by the show happening in front of your eyes.

All of those dots raining on you reminded you of something you had read about the Muggle word. A tradition they had about making Wishes for falling stars. So you made one only for the stars to know. Wishing for this moment to last forever. Wishing for Remus to stand by your side as long as he would allow you to do the same. And you made your wish known to the sky, your grip tightened around the brunet's hand. A gesture he mirrored.

Unfortunately, the show of stars raining into the horizon came to an end. Meaning for the four of you it was time to sneak back inside the prominent castle. Making your way backwards, none of you talk, all feeling content about what you had just witnessed. Behind the two troublemakers, neither Remus nor you found the strength to let go of each other's hand. Even if removing your hands was as simple as lighting your wand, it was just as easy to keep them linked.

Walking behind his two friends, Remus knew he was doomed. He had seen the mischievous glances they had shared during their trip back. Of course they had to notice how he never once tried to detach his hand from yours. But in his defense, you as well didn't try, neither did you voiced your discomfort or your desire to have your hand back. What was he supposed to do? He was a mess, letting his selfishness take the upper hand because of you. But strangely, it was a Welcomed feeling.

Getting back inside your school, you were unhappy. You didn't wish for the night to end, you didn't wish for Remus to remove his hand from yours. You were brooding and it was showing as you all climbed down the stairs in pure silence. The brunet, feeling all the same, decided to extend your night, even just a little.

"I think it'll be better if I take Y/N back to the Hufflepuff dorm."

Processing what he had just said, your eyes went wide. Never once in your life have you felt this lucky.

On the other hand, the two troublemakers didn't try to taunt their friend with his statement, both grinning at Remus silently coming to an agreement that they were going to tease him later. So they said goodbye to you, for real this time, before disappearing.

Seeing as none of you was ready to move, you tried. "Shall we?" You offered with a smile, extending your hands, hope glittering in your eyes.

Linking his hand back, he returned the smile, a fond smile that made you melt on the spot. He was the sweetest and you couldn't fathom why people weren't, wouldn't, see it. Since you introduced yourself to him, your days have been funnier, better, colorful. And knowing he was going to be stuck here with you for the holiday made you selfishly feel better.

The stroll back was slow, quiet. And too rapidly for you, you were back in front of your dorm.

“Well, this is it.” You spoke first, breaking the comfortable silence. “Thank you for the trip, and the escort.” And at last, with an aching heart, you let go of his hand.

Smiling softly one last time at you, Remus turned back on his heels, ready to make his way back to his dorm, ready to leave you. But you didn't want the night to end like that. So you called back for him, strolling back to catched up with him. At his level and without giving him the chance to question what was the matter, you kissed his cheek.

“Good night Remus.”

By the time he processed what had happened, you were already back in your dorm. Leaving a Bashful Remus behind you.

Is it that hard to reblog?

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

Doctor Who, but Chronologically 29ish

Fun fact! When we started this project, some Whittaker episodes did not exist, and we’ve skipped one! So Let’s hastily go back in time to 1807. We’ve just seen Tennant make eyes at Madame de Pompadour, we’re about to see Capaldi finally be a good guy and take Bill to the last London Ice Fair. Where are we this episode?

China! 1807 China, a little fishing village that gets annihilated by Sea Devils.

I was rooting for this episode, you know. It sounded great. The guest cast is smoking hot – when Crystal Yu turned up as Mistress Ching the Pirate Queen, I said “Oh no” aloud. When Arthur Lee turned up as Legendary Pirate Ji-hun, Steff said “Oh no” aloud. We are bisexual and week. Also, return of Sea Devils! And a Chinese episode! The TARDIS team is Whittaker, Yaz and Dan! Sounds great!

It’s crap. It’s just crap.

Good points: the banter between the characters is lovely, and I laughed many times. I suspect this is an actor-director. The start makes clear something I already suspected from the Flux stuff we’ve seen – that Dan is actually Yaz’s companion, not the Doctor’s. There’s a very fun scene where they all step out of the TARDIS, and Dan is dressed like a pirate. “What are you wearing?” the Doctor asks, incredulous. “Yaz told me to!” protests Dan. “Yaz!” says the Doctor. “Did you dress Dan in that?” Love it.

The sci-fi plot is okay. The Sea Devils have Team Aqua’s plan to flood the world and make more habitat for Pokemon Sea Devils, which they aim to achieve by swapping the magnetic polarity of the Earth’s poles. “I see!” exclaims a character. “That’s why all the constellations physically changed in the sky!”, a sentence that gave me 50 points of psychic damage and necessitated a quiet lie down.

The absolute worst part is that, continuing a grand tradition of Doctor Who writers trying to use Sea Devils, Silurians or Ice Warriors, these writers didn’t understand the story they were telling. We therefore ONCE AGAIN have an allegory of native people trying to commit genocide to reclaim their stolen lands and needing to be stopped. I am 100% certain that was not intentional, but fucking hell, lads.

But the second worst part is that this episode is absolutely atrociously badly shot. It is appalling. I spent half the episode trying to fucking see, because even in static scenes of two people talking to each other and not moving, the camera would just… slide off the characters, even while they are talking. And this is our second swashbuckling pirate episode featuring swordfights where they didn’t bother getting a choreographer, apparently, and thought they could make up for it by putting the camera in a bag and swinging it about in a windmill to cover the gaps.

At two separate points, two separate scenes, the Doctor offers a hand to Yaz to pull her somewhere. In both, the hand is partially-to-entirely out of shot, making the action unclear. And that is a problem, because THIS IS A DOCTOR/YAZ SHIPPING EPISODE HOLY SHIT????

It turns out Yaz has talked to Dan about this, and he has possibly talked to the Doctor, because there’s a lovely bit where Yaz fully embraces the Useless Lesbian Trope and begs him for details (“What did you say to her?? What did she say to you??? Omg tell me her exact words –“). Towards the end, while the Doctor saves the day and Yaz as ever fails the Sexy Lamp Test, the Doctor gives her a heartfelt confession.

“I can’t do relationships,” she says. “There’s no time. But if I ever did, it would be you. I’ve never felt like this, not since my wife, and I was a different man then.”

PLOT TWIST!!!!! Whomst is her wife??? How exciting. What mysteries are arising this episode.

Interesting, though, because so far, as nice as Yaz is, she’s super bland. Just nothing to her. Even episodes where she’s appeared hyper competent, she’s actually just been doing pointless busy work; she routinely fails the Sexy Lamp Test as standard. I wonder why her? Intriguing. Perhaps she will improve.

Anyway, at the end of the episode they agree to just stay friends and mutually Yearn for each other, and then the Doctor skims a stone INCREDIBLY badly (no srsly tho Jodie does Huddersfield not have a river or something you have to get LOW)

So! Let’s update!

“She” (an unknown person) is returning (perhaps River returned as Missy. Maybe Me? Maybe Clara???!)

There is something on Donna’s back

An entire planet, Pyrovilia, just… disappeared, somehow. (Maybe because the TARDIS is exploding??? Saturnine was also lost, and that WAS because of the TARDIS exploding. The lion man’s planet was also lost but he was a bit of a knob about it if I’m honest.)

Amy is maybe dead (she’s not)

The Doctor has been cubed (he’s out, but how?)

River is possibly blown up  (unless she’s Missy)

The TARDIS has blown up  (It’s fine now. Except it’s sort of melting now because it’s corrupted, but it’s fine again)

The universe appears to have ended  (the universe is back again)

The Doctor has employed(?) Nardole

(And Nardole was “reassembled???” Nardole had glass nipples and invisible hair?? WHAT THE FUCK IS HE)

There’s a vault in the TARDIS and it contains Missy but we don’t know why (sometimes she knocks for the bants)

What has happened to all these companions and where are the new ones coming from?

There’s an immortal Viking girl now. Her name is Me and she’s now looking after the people the Doctor abandons

What’s With The Silence?

Why was Rory entirely unconcerned by the entire world suddenly going silent when that is Not Normal and should have been, at the very least, extremely disconcerting?

What did the Doctor do to Queen Lizzie One?

Who is Captain Jack Harkness? (Is he the one who gave the companions a warning about the lone cyberman?)

Why is Amy seeing a one-eyed woman in a vanishing window?

What’s with the Doctor’s future involving getting shot by an astronaut?

Is Amy pregnant and why is it inconclusive?

Who is Sarah-Jane Smith?

How is the Doctor Bill’s teacher and why/where does he have an office?

What is going on with the Cyber War and the Cyberium???

Who did the Doctor lose to Cyber Conversion?

What happened with the Other Cyber War?

What happened with the Third War that deleted the void?

Why does Rose seem particularly important?

What’s with the Weeping Angel statues, and why can’t you blink at them?

What order do these Doctors go in? (Eccleston, Tennant, uncertain, Smith, Capaldi, Whittaker)

Which companion just… forgot the Doctor, and how?

Yaz and Vinder are about to die as Mori/Mwri/Muuri

There is a Lupari shield around Earth.

What’s a Time War?

What’s the Rift?

What’s Bad Wolf?

What happened with Amy’s pregnancy?

In which war did the Doctor become a war criminal, and how?

Who is the Master?

Why has Amy forgotten Rory?

Is Rory plastic or not?

Why is the Doctor sulking on a cloud?

How exactly does the Doctor have a cloud?

What exactly happened with Strax to, uh, tame him?

Which friend killed Strax?

Which friend brought Strax back?

Where did this lesbian lizard and human couple come from?

What happened with Clara as Souffle Girl and the Daleks?

How does Clara actually join?

Why so many Claras?

Why is Missy apparently in robo-heaven?

Why is probably!Missy pushing Clara and the Doctor together?

What is Trensilor and what happened there?

Who is Handles?

The Doctor is about to be dissolved by a beautiful geode man

The universe is being crushed by the Flux

Will the Doctor open the fobwatch?

Sontarans are invading Earth again

Who is Kate?

Who is Osgood? Another name of Clara’s again?

The fuck is the deal with the Grand Serpent

Does Martha get to go to an ice cream planet with 12-fingered massage aliens?

How did the Doctor forget Clara?

Who is Bill’s puddle girlfriend Heather?

How did Nardole die?

When does Bill get Cyberman-ed and die?

When does the Doctor shrink and enter a Dalek called Rusty?

Whittaker is falling to her death rn

Was that ring relevant?

Does anyone know the Doctor’s name?

When did Yaz talk to Dan about fancying the Doctor?

When did Dan talk to the Doctor about fancying Yaz?

Who was the Doctor’s wife?

[invested-in-your-future]

How different do you think the story would be had RWBY told Ironwood Salem is immortal from the get go?

Honestly? I detest the entire subplot.

Everything about Salem's(And Ozpin's) Big Secret is such a contrived nonsense. "Oh no, Ozpin has no plan against enemy that we thought was just eternal part of our world till just now?! What a monster! He gave someone ability to turn into birds? BAD PERSON!" Everything about the Fall of Atlas is such a contrived nonsense overall too.

Salem's secret would somewhat work if Creatures of Grimm was a somewhat recent thing. Maybe a decade or so. But no, this is a world that, since it's foundation, has been built on the Grimm being there.

Why are people EXPECTING her to be mortal or defeatable when the world spent HUNDREDS if not thousands of years just dealing with Grimm as inescapable permanent threat that never goes away?

Also why does so many characters stories tie to her directly? Raven ran away? Oh she's afraid of Salem. Ironwood is doing things? Salem! Lionheart is afraid and got coerced into nonsense? Because SALEM!

It feels like the show is trying extremely hard to prove how much of big and dangerous enemy she is. Everyone talks about her, everyone's motivations are affected by her, every single bad thing that happens is because of her. Instead of making her scary it makes the world feel small. Nobody is allowed to make good or bad decisions, fail or make mistakes without Salem being involved there somehow. Let characters have motivations and make decisions that don't instantly tie into big evil notsatan sitting somewhere in the distance. Let Fall of Atlas happen because of Atlas and the mistrust and the different points of view - don't involve Salem or her crew with this. Trying to mash both Salem's plan/attack and the Ironwood subplot into one just ends up a mess.

IF to go back on-topic, the dumb subplot just makes no sense. If they tell him, they are all in the exact same position as they were as RWBY would absolutely not go along with Ironwood's ideas at that point - the overall plot DOESN'T change - even if that one detail changes, the endgame is still conflict, just with all sides having all the information - Team RWBY would still go with same plan and Ironwood might modify his but would still refuse their's and would still be in a bad place psychologically(just for different reasons).

The only point in NOT telling him is for narrative to muddy the waters on who is right and wrong, but then the show just treats it as the right thing to do anyway and assumes the position that there's nothing ambiguous in this situation? As much as RT can harp about how its "the trolley problem" and all (its really not), the show itself absolutely doesn't treat it as such. There's no questioning of the outcome, none of narrative highlighting the ambiguity of situation or how it could have turned out differently. What's more a lot of it is redundant - "telling world about salem is will cause panic a…whoops it did not cause panic oh well". Its the good ol' RWBY tradition of filling a volume with things that are ultimately irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.

The whole thing just feels like the writers wanting to create a surface illusion of there being "character conflicts" and then hurriedly clearing them up because they don't want to actually write the said conflicts. A lot of Atlas arc conflicts end up being redundant or pointless.

Coincidentally exact same issue as Volume Nine - "Ohhhhh she's having a character confl- NEVER MIND SHE'S FLAWLESS AND TRAUMA ISN'T REAL"

[go-to-the-mirror]

Weaver time! I really do like this episode. If I'm being honest I like every episode - bar a couple stranger ones in season 3, they just weren't scary to me - so that isn't much of a surprise, but it's a pretty good one.

I'm also pretty tired, so... yeah? After this I'm going to go to sleep.

@a-mag-a-day

The concept of free will gets me pretty excited so enjoy the words!

This includes: love of Jon Sims, looking at Jon's life through the lens of "this guy ADHD", cat photo, musings on free will (good words), how are the tapes turning on, what does Annabelle mean about the statement summaries, musings on what the web is and "The Spider & The Eye" by pocketsizedquasar propaganda, discussion of Enid Blyton books, among other things.

DAISY (Quietly) Perhaps they bugged out. ARCHIVIST Was that a joke?

Asjdjshfhsjh I love him so much your honour. I want to shake him a little bit.

MELANIE I'm fine. Uh, a-and please don't call me Mel. DAISY What? Since when? MELANIE Always. I’m trying to be more open about this stuff.

Hnhrnhrh Melanie my absolute beloved <3 I'm glad she's getting better, that's good for her, you know. Being ok is really great actually.

ARCHIVIST I'm sure the flares will work fine. I mean, unless it's all some elaborate plot to have us burn this place down again. BASIRA So what if it is? ARCHIVIST I don’t follow. BASIRA I mean, anything we do could be part of the grand master plan. So, what, we do nothing? Just sit on our hands and hope that's not what the spiders want?

Jon's either incredibly impulsive or incredibly indecisive, which... A) Attention Deficit Hyperativity Disorder (the name is a misnomer, not a deficit, etc, i mean he's adhd though) and B) I mean like... that's sort of partially why he ended the world? I mean like grabbing this kid, dead parents, granny doesn't care about him - and yknow, a shitty childhood affects you, and with this Extra trauma, he'll be alienated from other people, due to the mundane things and because... you can't tell anyone about the spooky stuff.

And then he's already probably predisposed to be impulsive, to not think things through, and then ADHD it's... not a Great Time. Because of other people. You know, you're either too much or not enough, no one's ever going to like you so why try. With him it's like "I was an annoying child." "I was hardly an easy child to deal with." Like, not to sound like a broken record, but I see myself in that. It's not always malicious, but yeah, when you're always too much, too loud, too annoying, you internalize it, think there's something wrong with you, cut people off, don't... try.

Like, Elias's plan sort of depended on the Archivist and the Archival Assistants being... isolated. No one'll notice, or care when they die, or go missing, or change. And, I mean, yeah. He was pretty much alone. Is it an ADHD thing to have no best friends? Is it an ADHD thing to never wonder why you're alone? Like, he was closest with his assistant, who he suspected of murder, and his ex-girlfriend who he hadn't talked to in years. His work-life balance was terrible since before he discovered he'd work for life. Also ADHD ppl usually have a higher rate of substance abuse and addiction, because of the whole less dopamine thing.

This is getting so bloody off topic. Jon's combination fear of being manipulated and his impulsivity and inability to think things through, in addition to all the other things detailed above make him a great candidate for ending the world.

Sasha's too friendly, and we don't know enough about her to really draw any conclusions about how good of a (spooky) Archivist she'd be. I'd say she'd be a better mundane archivist but none of those people had anything even resembling a library science degree, and she was stapling things. Apparently you're really not supposed to staple things.

Melanie, I think, would be a great (spooky) Archivist, mostly because she's so similar to Jon. What with the whole chasing after War Ghosts thing, and being pretty prickly, and I think that she could have been an Archivist, Archivist!Melanie guys, come on, think about the possibilities! Also this leaves the door open for Flesh!Jon and I fucking love Flesh!Jon, but now is really not the time to get into that.

ARCHIVIST Yep. Official Institute paper and everything.

Official institute paper should be available as merch smh.

WHAT IF THEY HAVE PENS?? DO YOU THINK THEY HAVE OFFICIAL INSTITUTE PENS? THEYVE GOT TO RIGHT? OH THE POSIBILITIES OF NOVELTY STATIONARY!!

Free will is a funny old thing, isn’t it, Jon? Can I call you Jon? I’m going to call you Jon.

I mean, hey! It's an improvement on the other Avatars! He gets to be called a name! Lovely jubbly!

With any other animal, we talk about instinct, we talk about training. Perhaps, if we have spent enough time with them, we talk about personality. But we never talk about choice. We never look at a dog racing wildly after a thrown ball and think, ‘What an odd decision that dog has made.’

My cat, Marble, chases after things like a dog. He's so odd /pos, I love him so much.

Cat Anecdote (Catecdote?): Ereyesterday, early in the morning - so early to be basically still the day before - Marble climbed onto my bed and lay right beside me, and as I stroked him I realized how small he was - Marble's a mainecoon so he's a LOOONG cat - but, I realized that he's still just a cat, and as he purred as I fell asleep, I knew that I loved him more than anything else in the world. I love him so much.

[ID: A photo of a cat, sitting down with one paw raised, looking at something above the camera. He's a tabby maincoon, and is dark brown, light brown, and grey. His legs are mostly dark brown, his stomach grey, and the rest of his body a mix of dark brown and light brown. /End ID]

Look I had to include a photo of him. Sorry, this was so irrelevant.

Of course, people are so very different from dogs. Our brains are larger, more complex; so many more little factors and wrinkles to push us and pull us. But does any of it actually constitute free will? Free of what? We all have forces that drive us, circumstances that direct us, and even if we choose to ignore these and act against all logic just to prove that we can, is that not simply allowing the existential terror of our own powerlessness to control us instead?

!!!

Look, okay, if someone knew everything, knew everything about you and everyone else and the world and everything, then theoretically, they would be able to know exactly what you'd do. We're all pushed and pulled by forces in our lives, no matter how unpredictable you are, there's always an underlying reason, and if there isn't... well there's your reason.

I was baking a while back, and thinking about this episode, and I realized that every moment in my life had lead to me, standing in the kitchen, thinking about The Magnus Archives, and looking for some kind of measuring cup, and I realized that whatever decision I made, if I took one from the drawer, or from the dishwasher, or left the kitchen entirely, that choice was not my choice, none of them were, my whole life has been preordained from the very beginning, not in some fate way, but in that everyone is affected by the circumstances around us, and this just makes what happened happen?

Yes, we're responsible for our own choices, but are they really our choices? If knowing everything makes them not - which I believe, it makes sense - then they are and were never our choices, free will is ignorance.

Not only can free will and omniscience not coexist, but free will has never existed, it's just a lie we tell ourselves, because it makes sense to us. Why am I lying on my bed typing this out? Because I wanted to. But no. It's because Sixteenthdays wrote The Hermit Archives AU, it's because my sister got into an unspecified university, it's because Ashes started a mag a day, it's because the pandemic happened, it's because I was curious about hermitcraft fandom demographics, it's because I have a computer, it's because of so many things, and none of those things were done randomly either. I presume Sixteenthdays is writing THA because they like both TMA and MCYT. A mag a day was started because The Magnus Archives was created, because the mods wanted to re-experience the community created from the episodes initial airing. My sister got into the unspecified university because we moved to unspecified country. And that's only a fraction of the factors that lead to me, here, talking about these factors.

Terrifying to think about, isn't it!

He ultimately decides that, if all the millions upon millions of factors and influences that weigh upon our choices were fully and completely known, then all could be foreseen and predetermined. But, he argues, it is quite impossible for the human mind to comprehend even a fraction of these, and in that vast, dark space of ignorance lies ‘free will’.

Come onnn Jonny, we had an omniscient character who's bloody terrified of being out of control, I really really do wish that we'd gotten more of this sort of thing in season 5.

Like I get why not, his omniscience has limits, we're more focused on other things, but there was a missed opportunity there, I feel.

Where would it fit in? Idk!

I think that one probably comes down to whether or not you’re choosing to continue reading this statement out loud. You didn’t mean to, did you? No, I’m sure you told Basira and Melanie that you were going to glance it over and report back. Perhaps they asked you if you were going to record it and you shook your head. “Maybe later.” That sounds like the sort of thing you’d say.

!!!!!!!!! oh boy!!

Do you think that's... exactly what he said? Because I think it's exactly what he said and he's just like Oh Boy!

But think about it, Jon, when’s the last time you were able to read a statement quietly to yourself without instinctively hitting record and speaking it aloud? Is it just instinct, habit? Or is it a compulsion, a string pulled by the Ceaseless Watcher or the Mother-of-Puppets? Or both?

That raises the question - are the tapes turning on by themselves, or is Jon (and by extension Martin and co.) turning them on unconsciously. The Web has shown an ability to... distract... people what with Jon and his lighter. Jon's also been shown to forget to turn tapes off a lot of the time, and Tim did mention that Jon was just reaching for the tape recorder when they were talking (MAG 98). I feel like that's actually more plausible to me than them just... turning on by themselves. The Web's all manipulation and stuff. Alternatively, it's Annabelle Cane hiding under Jon's desk /j.

I know the summaries have started to confuse you. Where do they come from when you read a statement fresh? How do you just sort of know what it’s about before you even start to read it? But by then, you’re away, the rollercoaster is dropping and you’ve no real choice but to hold on and hope that I don’t crash you.

I'm guessing this is referring to statements that haven't been read before, like MAG 123 - Web Development. That raises the question, though, what about the statement of Hazel Rutter? I mean, he obviously didn't know what was going to be inside that, and The Eye can't lie.

Actually, I think Elias, you know, he just put the summary there so it wasn't one of the spooky ones, but like he's already... tied in by the point where he's reading the summary. No turning back, already too deep.

Also that line, just, "hope that I don't crash you." Hmm. Oh, Jon, there really was no way to avoid it.

Of course, I learned many of my skills from my mother, who could wield guilt like a rapier and anger like a scalpel. She never simply screamed at you. She was always aware of exactly what kind of fury or disappointment was needed to make sure you regretted ever catching her attention.

Sure! Did Annabelle grow up to... sort of be a part of The Web? Yes, she did. Sure, maybe it's manipulative, but you know what? I've been called manipulative, I've been worried I'm manipulative, and if The Eye can be the fear of being both Watcher and Watched, The Slaughter the fear of the one getting hurt and the one hurting, The End the fear of the one who stays alive forever and the one who knows when they will die, then The Web can be the fear of the one being manipulated and the one afraid of being a manipulator.

She might not have been afraid, sure. What we know of Annabelle's childhood is from the perspective of her fundamentally changed - in more than just the regular way - from that. We just don't know what she was feeling before, we barely know anything about her.

Just read "The Spider & The Eye" by pocketsizedquasar, it's really good, the first lines of the summary live in my mind rent free.

Annabelle Cane has a choice to make. (Annabelle Cane is not sure what choice is anymore).

Like! Aa! Sahar has great words.

She had eight children, yet weaved that life around herself in such a way that she always seemed both the victim of it, yet curiously divorced from any responsibility. In many ways, she was the victim, at least of my father, whose pathological absence spoke of a man who had no interest whatsoever in engaging with the life where he had trapped his family.

Uh nothing to say, just highlighting it. Hmnhrnh good words.

My biggest attempt to assert some form of influence over my family was when I decided to run away.

I've actually packed a bag to run away before and let it be known I was much worse at packing than Annabelle asjdssjfg

and the only book I could say belonged to only me: Five Go Down to the Sea.

I was always more fond of The Five Find-Outers and Dog, and The Adventurous Four, though I did like The Famous Five. I also really liked Mallory Towers. George from The Famous Five is definitely the reason I'm trans.

I will simply say that when a spider reaches a certain size, it is not entirely made up of spider anymore.

Hey, what the fuck does this mean! :D

So, how much free will was involved in that story? What could I have chosen to change? Would a different path have been possible? I felt no loss of control – no puppet strings guided me – and yet the Mother got exactly the result she no doubt wanted, one that would lead to a fear of spiders so acute that would later have that horror focused and refined into a silk-spun apotheosis.

Isn't it more terrifying to not know for sure whether you're being controlled or not? To be frozen in terror and indecision, unsure of which action you will willingly take will be the one they want you to take?

The Mother is the fear of manipulation and lost control made manifest, so perhaps it is our fear that projects her influence on everything that happens, like the mind retrospectively assigning reason to our actions, so we fit whatever occurs into the neatest pattern we can and declare her web both intricate and complete.

But, the mind of the dreamer affects the dream, so perhaps she wasn't weaving her own web, but the fear of her weaving her web made it so she could and did! Aaaa I love this podded cast!

Or perhaps I am simply telling you what you need to hear in order to behave exactly as the Mother wishes you to. Perhaps I have never even seen a beach.

THAT ENDING!!! OH WOW THATS A GREAT ENDING!! I LOVE IT SO MUCH! JUST dont dont drop the mic it'll damage it, BUT DO SOMETHING TO A SMILIAR EFFECT!

(Shaken) That was, uh… I d-didn’t like that. I couldn’t…

Fuck, dude, he really is shaken.

Ahhh it's only going to get... worse.

I can’t say I’m sad to have another ally allegedly on our side, but I don’t like the idea of being important to The Web. That’s a really bad place to be.

IT SURE IS! Aaaaaa... :(

Annabelle’s right, though. I mean, I can’t trust anything she says to not be another lie to further manipulate and manoeuvre us, but deep down, I think she’s right. What I’ve been doing to these people, it hasn’t been because I was puppeted or controlled or possessed. I wanted to do it. It felt good. But at least I know I can stop. I just... don’t know how. I don’t want to stop.

Hey, I mean! Good for him right, he has all these people around him to help! They're going to be nice about it and not threaten him with murder, right!

Right?

No but, I mean, I'm not really, I don't really feel right talking about this, I don't have any experience related to it, I'm just pointing to it. Great words! Yeah!

Well, that's been a little ramble! Hope you enjoyed the cat picture if nothing else. He really is the light of my life. See y'all tomorrow I guess?

[dirgeforthedead-s]

Prayer for Forgiveness headcanons // @dirgeforthedead // Part ???

It's the fact that I just found the 'Prayer for Forgiveness' for the first time a couple of nights ago and…

Dirge is very intelligent, obviously. She has to be in order to be the caliber of assassin that she is. But she has also been raised in such a way that her value was in action and in following orders, not in chiming in or giving her two cents or questioning. In some ways, at least, with my version, she is very much almost non-verbal for many years.

Now, in plotting with one of my friends who isn't on tumblr, we realized it isn't until meeting Enver that starts to change. For the first part of their acquaintance, it was very much Enver being kind of fascinated/intrigued by her and talking at her about things… and then eventually she started speaking, and she, in fact, credits Enver with helping her find her voice…

So I was reading the letter last night when I found it and I realized something interesting.

' Forgive me, Father, for I cannot help but admire the Chosen of your sworn foe: Enver Gortash's genius will take us far, but fear not — those of Bane always fall to the same folly: they cannot see the beauty of obliteration. The Absolute hoax will garner false love from new slaves, but once I've built a large enough army, I will use our hold upon the Absolute's slaves to begin this vile world's end.

I can see the path through Gortash's brilliant plan. Gortash, Ketheric and I will seize the Netherese relics that control the Crown, and then use the Crown to command the illithid Grand Design. The Dead Three, age-old foes, our dire patrons, will be bosom friends for a time.

Father, you created me to be the last soul alive. When the time is right, and my power is assured, I will slaughter Gortash and Ketheric upon your altar, where I myself hope to die when the world itself is gasping its last.

At the end of this all, Father, there will not be a single creature living. Everyone will die. Everyone will die for YOU. I will make you proud. '

[ note appended at bottom of page in a different hand ]

Ha! Orin was right about her sibling. — Balth.

What occurred to me… is that sections of that note almost sound like Enver's over the top, very particular way of speaking? Because, honestly, his speech pattern, the diction�� The way he speaks isn't exactly common, in my opinion. So when I say that he helped her find her voice, I guess I also mean that she emulated him in some ways.

I also find it interesting that she calls Ketheric by his first name, and Enver by his last. Almost as though she was overcompensating by trying to make him seem less important, less personal. If she uses his last name, it's all just business, right? Professionalism. See? Nothing to worry about because she has this totally under control.

[ask-narratordoe]

7-A: Howdy, Doe and co! Weird question about portals, if you don't mind? It's clear you've managed to make a connection to a version of Equestria, but not specifically ours. We know how to create a very short-lasting portal about anywhere, but how would you recommend we plan a visit?

Novi sent by @ask-the-prototypes and @ask-summer-epos

Woah, okay, lots of questions about the portal. This is a lot of information, so let’s break it down.

Where are the portals?

The portal on Lumerde’s side is underneath the capitol’s castle, where Queen Hestia and her father, former King Solaris, live. The portal is contained in a room that sets a cap on all forms of magic. The most you can do is pick up items with your hooves, but most anything else is disabled. If an alicorn were to enter this room, since their bodies partially rely on veriam, they would feel weakened. This also applies to shapeshifting, cloaking, or appearance changing magic: if it’s an active spell, like a changeling spell or an invisibility spell, it will be dropped upon entry. An Equestrian changeling actually tried to pass through while masking as a different pony once, but the illusion dropped and they were sent home.

What is the portal itself like?

The portal itself is very swirly and bright! (But not so bright that you can't look at it.) It’s covered in engravings and symbols. I’m sure you recognize the little musunovi on the middle sections. The top of the portal had a gem embedded in it called an “amulite.” The amulite keeps the portal stable, and it’s the only magic that works at 100% power in the room. It's the only amulite LHK has, but we used to have more... When you walk through, it doesn’t feel like you’ve walked through anything, aside from the change in temperature. Sometimes the portal does leave residue, but it’s nothing more than a couple of specks you can easily brush off.

The Portal Realm

Beyond the portal room is the portal realm. It looks kind of like a grand hallway; a realm between realms. (Sadly I don't have a picture!) This is where the musunovi come from, so it’s typical to see a few playing together. The novi are still colorful, but their colors shift as they see fit. I don’t like staying in this realm too long; you never know who-or what-you’ll see, so it’s best to move on quickly. There are multiple Equestrias, I think. The one I most often visit is directly to the right of Lumerde’s portal, but luckily there’s a directory in the middle of the room. Equestria TM8LR has three doors: A secluded spot just outside of Ponyville, underneath the castle in Canterlot, and a small home in the Crystal Empire. From those points, it’s easy to travel from place to place, and I usually pick Ponyville for my trips. There used to be only one Equestria, with only one exit under the castle, but plenty have opened up recently.

Planning a Visit

If you want to visit, you’re absolutely welcome to! In terms of making your own portal, any portal you make will simply generate a door to the portal realm. Just put it wherever is most convenient! I don’t know the exact details about how to locate the portal realm… but I’m sure you’ve got that part figured out. When you enter Lumerde, there’s information on the legal stuff, like currency conversion, IDs, and other things. To the left is the tourist station, with a briefing on Lumerde, our culture, and a list of major attractions alongside a map to other tourist stand locations. There’s one tourist stand minimum in each major city, with more specific information on the local events, sights, and attractions. Then right through the middle is more security, for bag and ID checks. I recommend taking a day trip, or even staying for a week if you want to see absolutely everything in the capitol.

Security

In terms of security, it’s pretty tight, since the portal does expose us to so many other worlds. Of course, bags are checked, and you do need an identity certificate. If you’re from other realms, usually a piece of mail from your local governing body or any official service, such as banks or doctor’s offices, is good enough for a single visit’s clearance. But if you want to make frequent visits, it’s best to register for a visitor’s ID, which does require some form of birth certificate. Resident’s IDs and visitor’s IDs look a little different, but have much of the same info. If you’re under 14 years old, you need a parent or guardian to help with getting an ID. The guards are actually quite friendly to anyone who approaches them to ask questions. The portal room has 8 guards stationed: two at each door, and four by the portal itself. They leave quite a bit of space for ponies to walk through, but it can still be kind of intimidating. I believe they’re armed, but there haven’t been any incidents that require intervention. I would still recommend tying up your hair for a visit. I wouldn’t want it getting stuck in the portal!

[teacherintransition]

Crisis of Confidence

Life lesson day 1: things rarely go as planned…Transitions in life are by their very nature CHANGE.

When obstacles come, keep driving forward, alter your path, but for god’s sake don’t ever, ever, ever go back!

“The best laid plans are …,” …100% reliable? …are easy to put together? …will often go sideways? …unnecessary? Which are most accurate? If you chose, “unnecessary,” go to the back of the line and cover yourself in bubble wrap… cause you’re gonna get beat the hell up by life. Bring Tylenol. The other answers are all possibilities with “total reliability” being possibly 0.0001% likely. Truly, how often do grand designs go off without a hitch? Not often, but there has to be a goal. I absolutely love the line from George Harrison’s song, Any Road, “But if you don't know where you're going

Any road will take you there!”* George was the man. You pick a road, but for damn sure you can expect bumps, potholes, detours and even a fender bender. The ticket is not to give up and turn back.

We made the decision to retire, I set my personal goals and we set goals for us, we envisioned where it would end up; and very little of what we’d planned turned out the way we saw things happening. Death and loss due to Covid…. nuff said. I never planned to write a book, we never planned to have to cancel travel plans, we never planned for the selling of the hospital where Kim worked for thirty three years to a soul crushing entity, we never imagined living in Alexandria, Louisiana or Granbury, Texas… but here the hell we are. Not what we expected, but we are still headed in the same general direction. The lives of our sons took extremely unplanned trajectories that affected our path and delayed some of our plans. Detours and delays have been in abundance, but the overall outcome is still doable.

This series of articles has always pushed encouraging words and a positive outlook during a period of major life transitions. It ain’t always easy… disappointments abound; and despite the freedom of the pressures of time philosophy I push, one is acutely aware that there’s more behind you than ahead of you. The diabolical “what if’s “ begin to surface: what if I don’t get this or that done? What if the place we go isn’t what you expected? What if time runs out? Heavy thoughts to ponder; and if disappointments occur with some regularity, any number of less than positive outcomes can occur. It can just seem easier to go with the flow of less resistance. In other words…compromise. During this period of life that was to be filled with calm, peace and dreams can often start to resemble the stressful struggles of the work world that you tried to leave.

My oldest son is a Marine and their famous motto, “ADAPT, IMPROVISE, OVERCOME,” has more depth that it might appear. I’ve had to adapt what end goals might look like in the end, but still recognize the spirit of what I wished to attain. Creative, quick thinking or improvising is essential. The free spirit mentality I try to promote when writing lends itself to goal improvisation. All sorts of metaphors come to mind and references to “Roads less traveled,” when finding confidence in an altered path and an open mind can reveal attainment of dreams that might go unnoticed. We’ve always wanted to live in a city and through Kim’s travel nursing job …we did! We have also wanted to live in the Hill Country, and now we are …temporarily. These were dreams that had been buried and forgotten; but zig was the path instead of zag, and we received a major surprise. Overcome: plain and simple, don’t let unwanted circumstances rob you of what you are wanting to do. Putting things off is ok, but giving up on them isn’t.

Nothing looks like you thought it would, but that doesn’t make it a failed attempt. The key is to not let struggles turn into stresses …this is your time. You should see the process as your adventure not the burdening obligations that retirement/transition was to free you from in this path. To paraphrase George’s earlier referred to song lyric; “If you know where you’re going, there’s not just one road to take you there!”

*Harrison, George; “Any Road;” Brainwashed; Parlophone, Dark Horse Label; 2003

[see-arcane]

Final Thoughts

I honestly don’t know how to feel about it. On the one hand, it wasn’t The Absolute Worst version I could have dreamed up. On the other hand, it felt a lot like getting a bullet to the head rather than the expected slow agony of a Jigsaw trap. On the third hand, it just...

Well, yes, it was always going to be a tragedy. But beyond a satisfyingly curt [SOUNDS OF BRUTAL PROMOTION] on Jonah Magnus, Jon and Martin didn’t get anything at the end. No last second victory, no salt-in-the-eye to the Web. Nothing. We get to see exactly why the Web made Jon so forgetful of the lighter--blanking on Georgie taking it the episode before--and whatever Jon might have been planning against the Web, against the Big Fear Move, it was all torn away before he could even try anything.

The Web has presumably won its apotheosis. And it never, ever suffered a single consequence. We can guess that it likely never will. Which really is incredibly on point as far as existential/cosmic horror goes. The Cthulhu Mythos and similar flavors of grand scale horror are fearsome on a solely supernatural and unfathomable level. But this?

This we can and do fathom. We know exactly what the Fear(s) wants. We know what it is capable of. What it will do. And that isn’t where our misery comes from: it’s the fact that there was no way to win. No way to change anything. Nothing to do but pass it on to the next victim; or victims, plural. That’s what makes me sit back in agonized awe of it. Not any of the phobias made solid. Just the pure crushing defeat of it all. It’s a deflating, stagnant recognition of helplessness that twists the knife far worse than any mere bogeyman. 

Jon did everything he could and failed. The only plan that ‘went right’ was the one the Web decided upon, which was designed to inflict itself and its kin on other worlds. The Only Success Allowed is the Success of Your Tormentor. 

God. God. 

I will say I liked the implications of that last scene; that Simon Fairchild and the rest of the depowered sadistic avatars got what was coming to them. (Much as I still love her, I honestly hope Annabelle Cane suffered some severe Mastermind Buyer’s Remorse when she realized she was left high and dry by her patron. Whoops. (For Oliver’s sake, I hope he was either spared or was finally allowed to die peacefully.))

Much as I loathe all the “Hope-hope-hope-Let’s-make-ourselves-feel-better-by-pretending-we-don’t-know-we-willingly-fucked-over-another-infinity’s-worth-of-victims-hope-hope-hope-!” talk from the survivors, I do appreciate the fact that it is an ambiguous “end” for Jon and Martin.

No bodies likely means they went with the Panopticon down the drain. Martin had to kill Jon to make that happen. Which can mean one of two things.

1) Martin is with the Fears alone--hello brand new Lonely avatar status--unless he found a way to end himself too. That’s the short version. Very neat.

Which makes me doubt it. So we turn to:

2) Jonathan “Too Inhuman to Stay Dead” Sims bounced back again. This isn’t just wishful thinking talking. Not counting his survival post-Unknowing, he was still the most powerful thing on two legs due to the Eye and the Change ritual. Martin being able to kill him made nightmare logic sense--but in the presence of the Fears, sans Terminus, death remains a temporary state. 

Jonah absolutely fucked off to the Corpse Roots in those final moments, may he rest in piss.

But Jon? Jon who was willing to sacrifice everything of himself since day one and was long past fear of dying? Jon who is the Eye’s Chosen Pupil? Jon who I’m sure in my bitterest heart of hearts is still far too ripe for torment for the Web to just let go, free from its strings at last?

I think this ‘death’ was as permanent for him as hitting the off switch on a tape recorder.

Which is all a long way of saying I think Jon is still alive with the Fears in their new playground, along with Martin. I honestly believe that. I believe this without any of the bells and whistles of wishful thinking. Because I frankly can’t tell--or don’t want to tell--if survival was a good or bad thing. Just that it’s very likely.

Thank you for the nightmare, Jonny Sims. It was horrible. I loathed it. I feared it.

I cannot wait to listen again. 

Supplemental:

For what it’s worth, Jon did confirm one important thing for us post-Pupil. The Web is making assumptions. Theorizing about what waits for it on the other side of Hill Top Road. It is likely we and all our interdimensional neighbors are there, true. But I do like to think that the fact of its obliviousness to what’s actually waiting there means it will meet something unexpected. 

To borrow one of the Web’s favorite words, perhaps it is another smorgasbord of waiting victims, free for the taking.

Perhaps not. 

Perhaps the Fears are not alone. 

Perhaps, even if we do not get to hear it, there is some catharsis waiting on the other end of the chasm. A frightful realization made too late that perhaps the Fears were only ever a big fish in its own small pond.

And now that the Web has swam the Fears out into the open ocean with no way back, perhaps now is when they realize they were never the apex predators they thought they were. Only a schoolyard bully faced with the sudden presence of a threat, or threats, infinitely greater than themselves.

Perhaps they have finally knocked on the wrong door. And what lurks on the other side has happily, hungrily welcomed them in. 

[luimagines]

Hi! I have a request, but first i wanna say your writing is absolutely amazing! The length + amount of time you put into these prompts is insanely good. Now! Onto the request, how would the boys react to a reader from a more modern era? Maybe a more modernized hyrule or our current point in time?

Masterlist

Thank you so much for the compliment! I'm happy to see the response even if this blog is still relatively new.

I hope I do your prompt justice.

I probably could have done a headcanon list but I was hit with inspiration.

I also might have given Reader some backstory.

Scenario below the cut! It’s long, take caution.

It was a cool night, but you didn't mind. Your bed was warm, the WiFi was fast and even if it was three AM on a school night, you managed to keep yourself giggling with cat videos and blursed memes until the words and colors merged.

A night well spent.

But it led to questionable decisions.

Even if the shredded cheese in the fridge was beginning to seem a more and more enticing snack, your body was tempted to succumb to slumber.

Until a large purple light encompassed the entirety of your window.

Something was in your backyard.

Aliens. Your tired brain supplies and you sprint to the glass and push away the curtains. Is this it? Is this where I'm kidnapped and never seen or heard from again?

You pull out your phone and open up the camera.

"Pics or it didn't happen." You remind yourself and snap a few before showing your face.

What you see isn't what you're expecting. Instead of a flying saucer in the sky beaming down a laser or a weird pear shaped space craft on top of the grass, there's a single panel of glowing light, swirling with black accents that creeps in a circular motion.

"Cheese and crackers...." You gasp and begin to blatantly stare at it with no regard to whether something may be coming out of it.

You wait and nothing happens.

You wait some more and nothing happens.

You spend an hour watching this portal that has appeared out of nowhere, waiting for something to happen, willing for something to happen. But you get nothing.

The unknown stares right back at you, unblinking and unchanged.

Go through it. A voice tells you. What if there's something on the other side?

"I'm going to die." You gulp and take a deep breath.

Who else gets a chance like this? The voice talks again. This could be a grand step towards a more modern society. A whole new world could be on the other side, waiting, reaching out, calling to humanity!

You think you a see a shadow move behind the portal and out of sight but it’s gone before you can even process it.

"Should I call the police?" You step away from the window, ignoring the thoughts, the voice- you're too tired to know if it's your own any more. What's the plan? How does one go about something like this?

Where’s your sense of adventure? Pack a bag and go! What if it goes away?

That last thought seems to get through to your tired brain and for a reason beyond your understanding, it latches onto it.

Now you’re excited.

You run to the closet and take out your old backpack. It used to be for school but it was fancier since it was the only one you could get. The bag had a replaceable water bag with a plastic straw connected through the back of it and the straps have just worn down enough to where they’re actually comfortable. It doubled as a hiking backpack and came with its own insulated lunch box that clasped on the back of it.

It’ll finally serve its purpose.

You quickly roll up your favorite blanket and strap it in tightly beneath the lunch box. You’re quick to take out two extra outfits and pack them as well as change out of your pajamas.

Ok. What would you need? You don’t know where you’d be going so this has to a catch all kind of deal.

You pack away your swiss army knife first for good measure. A solar powered charger for your phone and an extra pair of socks follow suit even after you’ve picked out the extra clothes.

You take out the water bag and run to fill it all the way to max capacity as you think of any other necessities.

You’d need food. You have a small jar of peanut butter and granola bars that can fit in the lunch box. You can bring your extra water bottle and put in the side pockets of the backpack, and maybe bring some of those powered flavor packets your brother loves so much. You think he has lemonade and some green tea ones.

Those would be great. He won’t mind, hopefully.

You let the bag overfill momentarily before running back to shove it in your bag. with the lid screwed tight.

Next you run to the kitchen, grabbing the first things that you thought of already and begin to look around for more.

You grab an unopened pack of beef jerky, a bag of veggie sticks and a half eaten bag of dried mangos.

During your search you grab the water bottle and fill that too.

You return to your room with your bounty and begin to carefully put everything in the box. With some more deliberation, you run back to the kitchen and make yourself a quick sandwich, eat it, make another one and pack that as well.

You look out side the window and the portal is still there.

The sun is beginning to rise now so you’re trying to go as fast as you can, unless you want to neighbors to think something is going on.

Even if it is.

You’re about to leave but in a stroke of brilliance, you run to pack sunscreen and bug spray as well. You see a small first aid pack that was bought recently for when you would take your family vacation but you reason that it might one of the most important things you’d have if you got hurt.

Into the bag it goes.

You grab your hoodie before you leave the door, wrap it around your waist and pocket your phone, your headphones and your wallet.

You feel immediately under packed when you step outside and see the portal up close.

It’s weirdly triangle shaped, you think and step closer.

You reach your hand out and try to touch it. It feels as if you put your hand through a humidifier but it’s not wet. It’s misty and cold but not necessarily unpleasant.

An idea hits you right before you take your first step through.

You pull up one of the earlier photo’s you took and send it to your friend’s group chat. It showed up in my backyard. I decided to make a bad late night decision and I’m going through. If you never hear from me again, I want you all to fight over my electronics. Winner takes all. Godspeed.

And you step through.

You had first assumed that it would merely take you tot he other side but very quickly realize that you have to walk through it.

The first part still had a little light but with time, it got darker. So dark that you couldn’t even see your hand in front of your face.

You kept walking.

As fast as the light disappeared, it came back and you stepped into the light of an open field, right in front of one, two, three, four, nine males that had appeared to be traveling towards you or rather, towards the portal.

The portal disappears in the process.

“Oh so we didn’t have to go through it! We had to gain another member!” One of them yells. “Would have been nice to know before we packed everything up!”

“Ho boy, where am I?” You ask and tighten your grip on your backpack. Why didn’t I bring a weapon?

They all had long tunics and swords on their backs. Old fashioned leather boots and hand bracers were the norm in this group and you realized very quickly that your jeans and t-shirt had wildly missed the memo.

“Dang, I didn’t think I’d walk into a LARP group. Sorry about that.” You sheepishly smile. “I had no idea where the portal was going to take me. But if you would be so kind-”

“Wait, what’s LARP?” One of them speaks up. He was a dirty blond and somewhere in the middle of the group height wise. He wore a white cape like thing with blue designs on the back but you didn’t recognize the symbol.

“Live Action Role Play?” You tilt your head. “It’s why you’re all dressed like that? Right?”

“This is just our clothes.” What appears to be the youngest bounces up to you. “What are you wearing?”

“First I could grab in my closet.” You admit and look down on it. It’s one of your comfiest shirts and best looking pants. You’re a little proud of yourself for finding those in the dark.

“Weird.”

“We’re heroes. We’re all named Link.” Cape guy speaks up again. “Is it safe to assume that you’re in the same boat?”

“Heroes?” Your eyebrows furrow together. “I’m not a hero and my name’s not Link.”

You’re quick to tell them your name and you watch as the confusion covers their faces. “My brother’s name is Link though if that helps anything.”

“Oh we needed him!” The youngest groans and it instantly irks you.

“What would you need with a five year old?” You deadpan and cross your arms. 

The information stuns the group.

“The portal showed up in the middle of the night and I’m the one that went through it. I’m pretty sure I was the only awake to even see it. Are you telling me that it was for my little brother?” You’d be lying if you said that you weren’t a little pissed. “My baby brother was supposed to go through it? He was asleep! He’s five. What kind of logic is that?!”

“Well...” The biggest and oldest of them runs a hand over his face. You think he has some cool tattoos and sick scar going across his eye but he looks about as angry as you feel, so you don’t say anything. “It appears the gods truly do not care for the hero’s maturity, only his existence.”

“Ok...What’s with all this hero talk?” You bite back. “What did... Where am I?”

“Hyrule.” The second with cool face tattoos speaks up. He’s got a large fur pelt around his shoulders and you have to tighten your grip against your backpack again to keep from reaching out to touch it.

Even so you feel yourself deadpan even more. “Hyrule? Like the ancient empire? The one that collapsed more than two thousand years ago? That Hyrule?”

You’re inclined to not believe them and write all of them off as crazy... but you also walked through a portal. And your grandma did say that magic existed in the strangest forms.

They all share looks of concern and some begin to murmur quietly amongst themselves but you’re too far gone to even notice.

“Did I time travel?” The idea hits you like a bus and you feel your eyes widen as you stare beyond the group. You quickly take our your phone and unlock it.

No signal.

“Is that a type of Sheikah slate?” Someone asks you.

“I don’t know what that is.” You reply automatically. “Wait, hold on, what year is it?”

“Why don’t you tell us what year you’re from and we can start from there?” The darkest brunette of the group speaks up.

“202x PC” You say robotically, not really processing the world around you anymore.

“That’s...” The blond with a long blue scarf speaks up with a slight hiss. “...Beyond any of our timelines. You see, we all come from different worlds and eras of Hyrule’s history.”

“I don’t think you’re the farthest down anymore, Wild.”

“This would then make them my successor, right?”

“It would make their brother your successor.” Someone amends. “I think they just jumped in his place.”

“Leave my brother alone.” You snap back into the present, pocketing your [hone again. “Ok, you know what, screw it. I don’t know what you’d want my brother for but I’m here now. I’d gladly take his place if it means he gets to stay home!”

“Hey.” A boy with pink hair stalks up to you looking a little more serious than you’d like.

“Nice hair dude, way to defy the gender norms.” You smirk a little before genuinely grinning, hoping to quell the tension. “What product do you use? It looks like Artic Fox but not every place sells their brand.”

“...I have no idea what you’re talking about but what happened to Ganon in your world? How have you been handling it?” He snaps and places his hands on his hips.

“Ganon? Like my old principle? That’s a name I haven’t heard in forever.” You’re confused again. “Last I heard he joined the police force only to be reassigned out of state. I don’t know what’s happening with him. Kinda hope he gets fired though. He’s not a bad guy but he’s not someone you’d want in that kind of position of power, you know.”

“Police force?”

You blinked and look them all over. They look very medieval. “Oh... You don’t have that...”

You begin to think about your history lessons and what they might be familiar with if they’re telling the truth about being from Hyrule.

“Ya’ll got knights?”

Many, almost all of them nod, a few with face of despair already on them before you finish speaking.

“It’s kind of like that. Mixed with a towns guard position... kinda. They enforce laws... at least they’re supposed to but the whole system is flawed and racist and really needs to be dismantled for the abuse of power that they have-”

“Abuse? Of power?” You have their attention again.

“It’s stupid and it won’t really make any sense if I try to explain because I doubt you have anything similar but it’s basically a group of people given the right to treat the public in anyway they like for their own benefit because they have no one telling them that they can’t.” You groan and slowly begin to feel your lack of sleep catch up to you. 

You slowly reach to behind you and sit down on the dirt, looking at all of them. “Mr. Dragmire wasn’t like...Demise or anything but he was a huge jerk. No one liked him. He liked me though. I remember that. I was the envy of the whole school because I somehow got on his good side while everyone else wants to strangle him. I think he was transferred for some misdemeanor or something like that... like he might have been throwing hands with someone he wasn’t supposed to. I never heard all the details. I didn’t really care for it when it happened either. I’m pretty sure he lost that fight though. The dude looked like a blast of wind could have knocked him over let alone someone’s knuckle sandwich.”

“I would love to hear more about this.” The youngest sits next to you with a large grin on his face. His eyes are bright and his body language reminds you of your cousin Zelda. You instantly think they’d get along like a house on fire. “What are your monsters like?”

“Monsters?” You tilt your head. “Be a little more specific bud, it depends on where you’re from.”

“You have that many?!”

“It depends on if you believe they’re real or not.”

“Speaking of monsters, can you fight?” The shortest walks up to you. You like that his tunic is stitched up with multiple colors and designs. It gives it personality, you think. “Do you have a weapon you’re more comfortable with?”

The question throws you off your rhythm and you don’t fight your wince. “What would happen if I say that I do not, in fact, have any sort of weapon on me?”

“I wouldn’t believe you.” Pink guy speaks up again. “That pack is huge, there has to be something in there.”

“It’s food, water and extra clothes my guy.” You lean back against said backpack since it won’t let you lay down with it still on. “Not a lot of space for anything else. I’m pretty good at hand to hand combat though. Karate’s a good way to fight out stress.” 

“Your bag’s not magic?”

“Why the hell would it be magic? ...Are you trying to tell me magic actually exists?” You raise an eyebrow as your eyes begin to close against your will. “I know my grandma said it does but I thought she meant like fairies and shadow demons.. and bigfoot. Can’t forget him, he’s the real MVP... You know...Children’s bedtime stories and stuff like that, it’s not real. But like magic magic? Magic items and the like? Find me Tinkerbell and I’ll show you Neverland, that’s what I say.”

“Are you serious?”

“Second star to the right, straight on till morning.” You respond.

There’s a moment of silence as the group in front of you processes your words. It’s hard to tell their reaction since you’re not looking at them but you no longer have the energy to do anything else.

“Are you falling asleep right now?” It’s the one they called Wild.

“I...” You try to open your eyes. They don’t budge. “I haven’t slept in nearly 20 hours... I think. I might have past 24 hours a while ago actually. Portal showed up at like four in the morning... I had to get up at six and I didn’t sleep at all before then.”

More silence.

“Great another one.” Someone scoffs.

You snort.

“Why did we pack up camp again?”

“No one kill me.” You say right before you lose consciousness. “Please and thank you.”

“They’re doomed.”

“Have some faith Vet. They stepped in for their little brother. That has to mean something?”

“They’re in for a rude awakening, and that’s all I have to say about it.”

[euterpessi]

Romance Manhwa/Manga Recommendations:

Historical Manhwa/Manga:

Death Is The Only Ending For The Villainess

I’ve reincarnated as the reverse harem game’s villainess, the one and only adopted daughter of the ducal Eckart family.

But the difficulty just has to be the worst!

Everything I do will only lead me to death.

I must be paired with one of the main male characters from the heroine’s harem before the ‘real daughter’ of the duke family appears!

Two older brothers who always pick a fight with me on every little thing.

The insane crown prince whose route will always lead to my death.

‘I only see the heroine and no one else’s wizard, and also her loyal slave knight, too!

‘First, let’s take some of them which I see no hope in, out of the list!’

“I didn’t know my place up until now. From now on, I’ll live as quiet as a mouse so you wouldn’t care the slightest bit!

But why do their interests in me keep on rising every time I draw the line?!

The Villainess is a Marionette

Cayena, the Imperial Princess, was known as the most beautiful woman in the Empire. She was a woman who knew nothing but evil and luxury.

However, she was destined for ruin: she would be used as a chess piece by her younger brother to secure his throne and killed by her crazy husband.

“I’ll make you the Emperor.”

“… Sister, are you referring to me?”

“In exchange, give me freedom.”

She had to change things before she became that Cayena.

The Reason Why Raeliana Ended Up At The Duke’S Mansion

Poisoned to death by her own betrothed?! Eunha didn’t wake up in a novel’s story just to get killed off again as an unfortunate extra! To change her story she needs a cover… 6 months pretending to be the fake fiancée of the novel’s male protagonist, Duke Noah Wynknight. But will this cold-hearted, angel-faced demon of a man really help her avoid another ill-fated ending?!

Your Throne / I Want to Be You, Just For A Day

The story follows main characters Medea Solon and Psyche Callista, who become archenemies after competing for the position of crown princess of the Vasilios Empire. On the day of the Yearly Prayer, Medea and Psyche accidentally switch bodies.

The Remarried Empress

Navier was the perfect empress, however, the Emperor wanted a wife, not a colleague. And so, the Emperor abandoned Empress Navier and placed an enslaved girl beside him. That was fine until Navier heard the Emperor promise the slave the Empress’ position. After many ups and downs, Navier decided she would accept being the Queen of the neighbouring country and remarry.

Kill The Villainess

Eris Mizerian was the villainess of a novel. The only daughter of a marquis, she got executed after scheming against the pure and lovely protagonist, Helena. My only goal, after possessing her, is simply to leave this world and go home. I am prepared to face even death, but the laws of this world keep stopping me.

A changed Eris begins to draw the attention of three men who once loathed her; the Crown Prince, the High Priest, and the Knight.

"It doesn't matter. I will never be able to love this world."

Even if the only way out is death,

even if the only way out is make a deal with a witch...

I will absolutely leave this world!

This is the story of the villainess who defies fate, Eris, and her escape from this world!

The Way To Protect The Female Lead's Older Brother

I accidentally took possession of someone in a 19+ reverse harem novel.

The problem is that I became Roxana Agriche, the older sister of the sub-villain. My damn father kidnapped the heroine’s brother. Now, is the only thing left to meet a terrible end from the vengeance of the heroine?

But what if I can avoid that horrible development?

“I’m also interested in this toy.”

“I’ll protect you until you can get out of here safely.”

The heroine’s brother, Cassis Pedalian, will definitely be able to pay me back later.

Shadow Queen

“Can you be my daughter for me?”

By his offer, Elena became Duke of Franceschi’s fake daughter.

She became the queen and gave birth to Crown Prince’s son.

Then suddenly, Princess Veronica who was assumed dead came back.

She was only just a toy.

But eventually, Elena gets her son taken and is murdered.

However, she went back to the past.

“I’ll destroy all of you.”

I’ll never live as a toy again.

Elena decides to seeks revenge.

Under the Oak Tree

The daughter of a duke, the stuttering Maximilian, married a knight of lowly status at her father’s coercion.

After their first night, her husband departed for an expedition without another word.

He comes back three years later, this time as a famous knight in the whole continent.

How would Maximilian face him on his return?

"The more I think of you, the more lonely and lonely I become. I don't know why I can't quit even though it's so painful."

I'm Stanning The Prince

Angela’s fanfic became such a sensation that it even reached the Imperial Family, leading her to get arrested on charges of treason. Nevertheless, her fanfic improved the First Prince’s image, and his sister, the Princess, decides to take political advantage of this and keep Angela by their side. 

The heroine who can now fangirl to her heart’s content, and the Prince who doesn’t know how to act around her. As they bicker back and forth, they start growing closer…

Miss Not-So Sidekick

Hyejung loved to read to escape her daily stress. But that’s before she woke up inside the bizarre world of her favorite novel! Instead of the main heroine who courts three eligible men, she is now Latte Ectrie – a minor villain that everyone hates?! One way or another, it’s a chance to live out her most beloved storyline, with popcorn in hand to watch all the drama! Taking charge of the narrative takes on a whole new meaning!

Even Though I’M The Villainess, I’ll Become The Heroine!

I wasn’t able to overcome the harassment and took my life, but I was reincarnated with the perpetrator? The perpetrator is the heroine, Florre, and I am the villainess, Dahlia, who’s going to die horribly.

“They said you are a villain with neither blood nor tears, but unlike the rumors, you often shed tears.”

“Your Highness must believe all the nonsense the idiots are talking about, huh?”

Grand Duke of Cervian, the half brother of the Male lead and who will be punished for treason afterwards. He approached me. I can’t lose the man who will be my greatest ally.

“Your Highness, would you marry me?”

“Now…… what did you say?”

“And take revenge together.”

A similar situation, a fixed ending. The heroine is not the only one who knows the ending of the novel. I took a long and arduous path of revenge.

Who Made Me A Princess

The beautiful Athanasia was killed at the hands of her own biological father, Claude de Alger Obelia, the cold-blooded emperor! It’s just a silly bedtime story… until one woman wakes up to suddenly find she’s become that unfortunate princess! She needs a plan to survive her doomed fate, and time is running out. Will she go with Plan A, live as quietly as possible without being noticed by the infamous emperor? Plan B, collect enough money to escape the palace? Or will she be stuck with Plan C, sweet-talking her way into her father’s good graces?!

The Villainess Reverses the Hourglass

With the marriage of her prostitute mother to the Count, Aria’s status in society skyrocketed immediately. After leading a life of luxury, Aria unfairly meets death because of her sister Mielle’s schemes. And right before she dies, she sees an hourglass fall as if it were a fantasy. And just like that, she was miraculously brought back to the past.

“I want to become a very elegant person, just like my sister, Mielle.”

In order to face the villainess, she must become an even more wicked villainess. This was the new path Aria chose to take revenge on Mielle who murdered both her and her mother.

The Evil Lady's Hero

Junipe Magnolia, a villainess friend of the heroine in this novel called Rael Cania.

The Junipe inside the novel has always loved the male lead, Iseed. To the point where she harassed Rael out of jealousy because she's loved by Iseed.

And thus, Junipe is destinied to die in the hands of the male lead of this novel.

But one day.

"Why did I become Junipe?!"

But let's think about it, it's still one year away from the time Junipe is going to get killed by Iseed. So, I have to meet Iseed and Rael first, I'll be able to find a way out of my death if I do so.

Yeah, let's meet them first!

But, this man is just so tender-hearted and kind. Would Junipe be able to escape from this man?!

I Tamed a Tyrant and Ran Away

God gave me a chance to relive my life. Before the rebirth, I had been used for the past 400 years as the empire's sword. And so, I swore to destroy the empire. I found the young prince of the country and became his teacher. I taught him how to become a tyrant and asked for the country.

"I will do the lady's will."

He conquered the whole empire for me, and I ran away.

"I came to take you, Charlize Ronan." Dylan became a perfect tyrant and searched the entire empire for me.

"You tamed me, so why did you run away?"

Untouchable Lady

“Please, Hilise. Please die in place of Gabrielle.” My always dignified brother begged me for the first time. He wants me to die for our stepsister, whom we don't even share a drop of blood with. “For the first and last time, I ask you this.” I've always been miserable, and there is no exception this time. The seventh time that I was betrayed and killed, I was completely free of lingering feelings. “I'm glad that you're a scumbag until the end.” I won't be swayed by love anymore. It's my turn to abandon them first.

I’ll Live On As A Villainess

I reincarnated as the villainess in a book!

The one who dared to commit attempted murder on the heroine is the owner of this body?

Let's just live in a quiet place where we have fun and eat! That's what I thought for a while.

It was so, so, so cold here in the north, where I was kicked out as a punishment.

Before I froze to death, I called the Great Demon of Fire and set fire to the fireplace but...

Why isn't he going back? If you've done the job, shouldn't you go back?!

I was flustered to find out that I had signed a life contract with a demon just to start a fire but to think that I'd be responsible for relieving his desires!

The bickering romance between a big puppy demon and a small villainess lady!

It Looks Like I’Ve Fallen Into The World Of A Reverse Harem Game

When I opened my eyes, I was in a different world. I had become the game’s villainous princess who was feared by all. Not to mention… Completely naked men I didn’t even know were approaching me left and right! “Are you cold? Shall I warm you up with a hug?” “Oh? Have you not had enough yet?” Seriously, what’s up with this situation? And just how the hell am I going to get out of this freaking game?!

Father, I Don't Want to Get Married!

I’m Jubelian? The daughter of the duke and the villainess of this novel?

I managed to avoid my death with some previous knowledge about my life, as this was my second time at it. Now, I should be able to live a peaceful life!

“I’m not going to marry a man unless he has everything. I want the most wealthy, famous, and competent man there is.”

I dreamt of a glamorous life as the daughter of the duke, but my father tells me the Crown Prince who is known to be a lunatic is to be my husband! As an extraordinary measure, I couldn’t help but start a contract relationship. That is, with a handsome side character that looks better than the main one.

“Why are you trying to avoid being engaged to the prince?”

“He’s scary. I heard that he even kills his own entourage if he doesn’t like them.”

A few days later, the prince sent a terrible letter to me.

“I will not kill you.”

Oh no, did I set up another death trap for myself?

Like A Wind On A Dry Branch

"Hi, You."

Count Casarius fell victim to a plague and died suddenly, leaving behind a will stating that Rietta, his beautiful young widow of the manor, whom he tried to use as a concubine, be buried alive alongside him. Just before Rietta is buried, Archduke Axias, rumored to be a cruel tyrant, arrives at the funeral to collect the enormous debt Count Casarius still owes him.

“Everyone here seems to feel sorry for her, and I still have a debt to collect from Casarius… If I take her instead of debt, I think all of you here should be happy," he smiled.

"Hello, Temptress."

Everything was a Mistake

Roa Valrose reincarnated as villainess in the book. In order to avoid the fate of being burned at the stake, she approaches the hero, Nocton Edgar.

It hurts every time she gets closer to him. Nevertheless, for her survival, she does everything he wants her to do.

“Come again, Valrose.”

The mysterious Nocton unexpectedly sought her out every day.

Then one day, her friend for 10 years says something unknown to her.

“Actually, I have a dream. The Duke of Edgar is a terrible villain!”

He is not the hero, but the villain?

As soon as she realized that she had misinterpreted the role, she decided to get away from Nocton.

“Let’s not meet anymore.”

But the villain’s reaction was strange.

“Don’t go. You’ve always been special to me.”

She was suspicious of his sudden change of attitude.

Will she able to get rid of Nocton safely?

I Became the Tyrant's Secretary

I became the secretary of a tyrant in place of my clumsy brother to survive.

But I have so much potential for it. I’m so darn good at my job. Because I served the tyrant so well, ‘Everyone has a happy ending’.

Well then, shall I quit being a secretary and live a leisurely life now?

“Rosaline, tell me what you want.” He asked as he stepped down from his chair.

“I want to quit.”

His eyebrows twitched slightly.

“Do you want to die?”

Your highness, you never hold on to people who want to leave, so why’re you being like this to me?

Seduce the Villainess Father

After being in a bus crash, I woke up to the world of my favourite web novel.

Not only that, It was before the protagonists were born, to their parents’ world!

To stop the incoming multiple bad events.

I tried to prevent the kidnapping of the sister who is pregnant with the female lead!

But I got kidnapped instead?!

It's depressing to be kidnapped, but my body couldn't handle the mana and became a sunfish-like state

But... if I am next to the emperor who kidnapped me, my body becomes normal!

Right! The way to save that man from marrying a witch and getting killed by his son, and for someone who is vulnerable to mana such as myself to live, is for us to get married!

The Villains Savior

Set on a path to tragedy and misfortune from a young age, Aseph Randell is doomed to die a villain. That is, until the mysterious Elzay Tiathe appears in his life with a promise: "I can save you." After having vivid visions of him for so long, can Elzay untangle the twisted fate tied to Aseph... or will they both be dragged down together?

Contemporary Manhwa/Manga:

Night Crying Crow

This woman; who is she?

If something was action, it'd be action. If something was romance, it’d be romance. The A-list actor Cheon Woo Kang, who's great at every (genre), had his heart stolen away by an unknown woman who’d broken into his house!

“We'll meet again.~"

Woo Kang contracted an over imaginative illness as he drew the woman, whose name he didn't even know. In front of Woo Kang, she reappeared as the police officer Park Tae... Could the shadow of the crisis that appeared in front of them be a coincidence?

Raise wa Tanin ga Ii

Yoshino Somei would have been a normal high-schooler if not for the fact that she is the granddaughter of the leader of the Osaka-based Somei Group, the Kansai region's largest yakuza organization. One day, Yoshino hurries home after hearing of the news about the unification of Kansai and Kanto's biggest syndicates, the Somei and the Miyama groups. This, according to the article, will result in a marriage of the leaders' grandchildren—one of whom is Yoshino herself! Despite her best efforts to annul the arrangement, Yoshino has to go to Tokyo to visit her fiancé, Kirishima Miyama, who is unexpectedly nice and charming.

During their first meeting, Yoshino is swept up in various events and becomes unable to refuse moving to Tokyo, which is why, half a year later, she now lives with the Miyama group. At school, she soon realizes that Kirishima is very popular, so her relationship with him garners the hate of his fangirls and subsequently results in bullying. To make matters worse, Kirishima could not be further away from her prince charming since he, after all, was born to be a yakuza member.

Raise wa Tanin ga Ii follows Yoshino and her new life in Tokyo that is filled with nothing but troubles connected to the underworld. However, though she wishes to be as far from it as possible, this isn't Yoshino's first time dealing with the world of the Yakuza...

Positively Yours

To Hee-won’s dismay, the BFF she crushed on and her other BFF are now dating! Seriously bummed, Hee-won decides to go wild just one time, and find solace with a handsome stranger. A very satisfying one night affair has now turned into more — she’s pregnant! Fate brings them together again, and now the regimented Doo-joon is determined to do the right thing and marry her. But they’re basically strangers! Except... their bodies have been very intimately acquainted. What’s this mother-to-be to do?

True Beauty

After binge-watching beauty videos online, a shy comic book fan masters the art of makeup and sees her social standing skyrocket as she becomes her school’s prettiest pretty girl overnight. But will her elite status be short-lived? How long can she keep her real self a secret? And what about that cute boy who knows her secret?

Cheese In the Trap

Hong Sul is a ordinary college student. Yoo Jung is the school's most popular upperclass man. He's good looking, rich, smart, and even nice. However, Hong Sul thinks there's more to Yoo Jung than what meets the eye…

SPY x FAMILY

The master spy codenamed has spent his days on undercover missions, all for the dream of a better world. But one day, he receives a particularly difficult new order from command. For his mission, he must form a temporary family and start a new life?! A Spy/Action/Comedy about a one-of-a-kind family!

Doppio Senso (18+)

“What are you thinking about?”

“I’m thinking about a guy.”

KyungHyun stopped in the middle of a deep kiss and sighed. His lips began to form a smile, but his fierce glare said otherwise. Possessiveness and jealousy spread across his sculpted face.

“Will you tell me his name?”

His easygoing and languid voice reached her ears.

“Why?”

“So that I can shoot him down.”

[paperpocalypse]

white rabbit.

50 Wordless Ways to Say “I Love You”: 2. Tucking the sheets around them when they stir during the night.

Pairing: Five Hargreeves x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 1,874 words

Warnings: Swearing, panic attack

His idiot siblings are going to give him a goddamn aneurysm.

The hum of the Commission briefcase – which is now in 2019 without a single person attached to it – rings in Five’s ears, mocking. He resists the urge to scream and tear all of his hair out. All that work – wasted!

“Now what?” Luther asks as Five paces up and down the alley.

What do you think, you doorknob? “Now nothing, Luther, all right? Make your peace with God.”

“What? What about Allison and Vanya?”

“Screw them both. They should have been here.” Five’s irritated pacing turns into a run, and he furiously kicks a cardboard box. God, the alley smells like vomit and shit. Everything is shit! “Ugh!”

“What about Diego?” Klaus slurs out his two cents from his place on the ground. Useless puke bag. “He's quite a responsible young man, no?”

“Something must’ve happened to them,” says Luther.

Fuck that. Wherever they are, they’ll be dead soon enough. Does nobody understand that? Dead! Dead! Dead!

“Screw Diego, all right? Screw everybody!” Five seethes. “[Y/n] and I were better off in the apocalypse.”

He turns on his heel, trying to suppress the rising panic in his bones. Something catches his arm.

Your brow is furrowed when he meets your gaze, mouth set in a thin, worried line. “Five,” you murmur, voice soft.

A tiny sting of regret worms its way into his chest at your expression. But then he thinks of the briefcase, and the Handler, and he quickly looks away.

“Five!” Luther admonishes, casting you a concerned glance. “Come on.”

His brother’s tone grates on the last of Five’s nerves. Gritting his teeth, he advances on the large man. Your hand slips away.

“You know what, Luther? It's every sibling for himself now.” Five throws his arms out in a grand gesture, then makes his way over to the door. “How ’bout that?”

Yanking the door open, he storms into the building.

Five tries to think as he stomps up staircase after staircase, but he can’t hold onto a thought for more than a few seconds before it disappears into a muddle of static. Concentrate. He just needs to get to the flat and think of a new plan, yeah, again, and try to save the world for the millionth fucking time – he stumbles over a step and then rights himself, legs numb. His chest feels tight. Come on. Keep moving. Think, think! God!

You’re calling his name. He doesn’t answer.

There is another way. A Hail Mary. But what if they waste that last chance too?

He swears underneath his breath, heart pounding. Blood roars in his ears. He tightens his grip on the railing and tries to even out his breathing.

Shit. Now is not the time. He needs to get out of this stairwell. Everything is so cramped and it’s not helping at all –

“… Five.”

You’re behind him, and then you’re in front of him, and Five meets a blurry set of eyes for the second time. Breathe. Breathe.

“Do you want to go back outside?” you ask softly.

No more stairs. “Flat,” he manages to reply, gesturing messily at the door a few feet away. Just somewhere with some space. In. Out.

You nod.

Several minutes later, he’s sitting on the bed in the room that Elliott had given him, blazer folded over the footboard, face damp with sweat and tucked into the crook of your neck as he completely breaks down.

Your hands treat him gently, rubbing circles into his back and wiping his face. He grips your shirt until his knuckles are white.

“You can get through this,” you say to him. “Just breathe with me, okay?”

Five tries. He really does. A shudder wracks his body. You inhale. He inhales. Exhale. Exhale.

“Good job.”

Something wet runs down his cheek. Fuck.

Both relief and shame fill him when you dry his cheek with your sleeve.

It’s absolute shit, however long it lasts – Five doesn’t know how long. Too long. But you’re there the whole time, holding him like you’ve done before, and it helps even though he’s too embarrassed to admit as much. You help a lot.

As the hammering in his chest finally slows to dull thuds, he takes in another deep, slow breath, and loosens his grip.

“I’ll get you some water?” you ask. He moves his head in some semblance of a nod. “Okay. I’ll be right back.”

Carefully, you detach yourself from him; the mattress creaks as you stand up and leave. Five swallows, staring down at his hands. The air feels slightly chilly on the side of his face that had been pressed against you, and he uses the comforter to quickly scrub away the dampness. His eyes ache.

You return soon enough with a glass of cold water. He sips slowly at first, then gulps the rest of it down. You put the empty glass onto the nightstand and brush his hair away from his eyes.

“You need to rest.”

The word brings a brief wave of longing. Then stress follows soon after, and Five steels himself. “I need to come up with another plan,” he mutters.

Even though he’s not looking at you, he feels the sudden burn of your gaze as you put your hands on his shoulders. “After you rest.”

“The apocalypse –”

“Is still a few days from now.” Your words take on a honeyed, coaxing tone. “There’s not much else we can do today, so sleep. Please. I’ll take care of things while you’re away.”

You press down, and despite his previous protest, Five doesn’t resist.

“… Thanks,” he vaguely hears himself mumble.

When his head touches the pillow, it feels as if all his muscles give way. His eyelids immediately feel heavy.

The last thing he’s aware of is you taking off his shoes.

—

Five is thoroughly conked out by the time you pull the blankets over him, and after giving his forehead a tender peck, you tiptoe out of the bedroom and shut the door with a quiet sigh.

Now on to business.

The rest of the Hargreeves siblings, as well as Sissy and Harlan Cooper, sit up slightly as you stride into the living room. You make a point of looking at each one of them individually, cross your arms, and then speak.

“I believe explanations are in order.”

Diego is the one who speaks first. “I ran into Lila,” he says, maintaining eye contact with you. “She tried to drag me to the Commission while I was burying Elliott.”

“I see,” is all you say. “Allison?”

“Some men came in and attacked Ray and me at the house,” she explained. “Otherwise, I would have been on time.”

“Did you kill them?”

“I made them leave.”

“All right. Vanya?”

“Carl called the police to stop us on the way here. I had to deal with them.”

Sissy and Harlan are not supposed to be here. Based on the hard look Vanya is giving you, she knows that. You close your eyes and breathe out softly.

“All right. Well, I can’t change the past, and the briefcase is already lost, so I’m not going to shout about how everything should’ve gone,” you eventually tell them, eyebrows drawn. “I just want to talk to you about Five.”

“What's wrong with him?” Diego asks.

Klaus answers for you. “He’s pissed.”

Luther agrees solemnly. You frown.

“He’s stressed. Yes, he’s angry, but he’s mostly stressed and worried sick.” You uncross your arms. “Do you know what he did to get that briefcase?”

The siblings blink at you.

“He assassinated the board of directors,” you say. “I know you don’t know much about the Commission, but what he did was a big deal and very dangerous. And he did it for you. He does everything for you, because you’re his family, and he cares about you.”

“He has a hard time showing us,” Diego mutters.

“And you guys seem to have a hard time showing him,” you return. “It just … it feels like you see the apocalypse as Five’s problem. And maybe mine as well, but not yours. I understand that you’ve had to adapt and make a life here, but none of you except for Sissy and Harlan belong in this time. Whatever we’ll have to do from now on will require all of us to stay together. We can’t risk another doomsday.”

“Doomsday?” Sissy speaks up, alarmed. “What’s this about a doomsday?”

Vanya shifts. “It’s …” She touches Sissy’s hand gently. “It’s kind of a long story. I’ll tell you later, okay? You and Harlan don’t have to worry about it. We’ll fix it.”

“We will,” you confirm, nodding at the pair. “As long as everyone does what they’re supposed to.”

Luther looks at you curiously. “Why are you telling us all of this and not Five?”

Why, indeed. Glancing back in the direction of the bedroom, you think of Five tucked away in bed for the first time since he landed in Dallas. Hopefully, he hasn’t snuck out. You’ll have to check on him soon.

“He’d be too stubborn to admit it. It took me a long time to find out how much he sacrificed to help me in the apocalypse. And the Commission.” You smile frankly. “What’s more, he’s resting now. It’s been a long two weeks.”

“Shit,” Klaus mutters. “I forgot about the time thing. The old man must be one apocalypse away from a heart attack.”

“Yes. He’s not invincible.”

Everyone looks down awkwardly.

“We’re sorry for not making it. We didn't know. And we’ll tell him that.” Allison folds her hands tightly in her lap. “So what do we do now?”

Again, not much. Shrugging, you gesture to the couches and chairs that they’re sitting on. “Rest. Get cleaned up. Five and I will need to explore our options once he’s awake.”

With that, you turn and start making your way back to the guest room.

Vanya’s tentative voice stops you when you’re halfway through the kitchen. “Let us know when he wakes up?”

The other siblings voice their agreement. A genuine smile touches your lips. “I will,” you answer, pleased.

The murmuring in the living room fades as you continue walking. When you reach the bedroom, you gingerly open the door and poke your head inside.

Five is exactly where you had left him, tucked in with the blankets up to his chin and dead to the world. Soft snores reach your ears as you creep closer. Good. Seating yourself at the edge of the mattress, you run your fingers through his hair.

For the rest of the evening and most of the night, you watch over Five, keeping quiet and re-tucking the sheets around him whenever he stirs. He doesn’t open his eyes once. His siblings drift in occasionally, individually or in pairs, each of them looking every bit like they’re entering a lion’s den until you smile and beckon them closer. None of them speak, but they don’t need to. You can only hope that Five won’t be too angry with them in the morning.

A lot of work will need to be done then. But for now, your partner needs to sleep.

[doctorstethoscope]

Moment || Aaron Hotchner x gn Reader

A/N: hiiii besties expanding on a lil prompt from the weekend due to popular demand! Thank you to @the-modernmary for  helping me with it!! If u liked this teeny bit of angst u will love her fics!!

just a little note for those of you who read The Right: I am going on vacation this coming Saturday-Wednesday. I will have the chapters queued to post for y’all, but I will not be able to respond to taglist requests or update the masterlist until I come back! Still let me know what you think about the chapters though, they’re some good ones! ok onto this fic.

contains: slight cursing, alcohol consumption

wc: 1.7k

You take a deep breath as you walk out of Strauss’s office, taking exactly one beat to regain your composure before hastily making your way over to Hotch’s office, letting yourself in without knocking. 

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me,” you said by way of greeting as you crossed his office and settled into one of the chairs across from his desk.

“Tell you what?” Hotch asks, looking up from his paperwork with confusion knit across his brow. 

“That Strauss was going to harangue me the second I walked into the building this morning. I seriously didn’t even make it past security before she nabbed me.” You told him, disgruntled. 

“I didn’t know. What did she want?” Aaron asks, and you look up and see that he’s telling the truth-- he really didn’t know. 

“Oh… I assumed she would have cleared it with you before she asked me.” You said, your boisterous energy deflating the longer you sat in the chair. 

“Is she pulling you for undercover work? She always does that, and she never asks if we have anything coming up or what your consult workload is--” 

“No, Hotch. She’s, uh, she’s not pulling me for undercover work.”

“What is it?” 

“She said the director tapped me to lead the field office in Vegas.” You confessed, looking up and seeing the air leave Aaron’s chest. 

“Wow.” Aaron says, blinking. 

“Yeah,” you agreed. 

“And you’re going to take it?” He asked. 

“I told her that I needed some time to think about it.” You answer him.

“What’s there to think about?” He wonders. 

There’s a moment where you think you might actually roll your eyes at him. There’s a moment where you consider begging him to give you a reason to stay. There’s a moment where you consider crossing the desk and depositing yourself in his lap, kissing him with the weight of all of the feelings that had you wanting to stay. 

But, after a moment, you realize that none of that’s happening. He’s sitting across from you, looking at you like you’d be the biggest fool in the world not to take advantage of this opportunity, and maybe he was right. Maybe you would spend the rest of your life wanting him one-sidedly, wondering what good you could have done for the world if you had simply accepted that he’d never love you back. 

“Nothing,” you answered, after a moment. “There’s absolutely nothing to think about at all.”

****************************

Aaron’s barely even distracted when you swing his door open and plop yourself into one of his chairs first thing in the morning. He’s used to it, by now. He may have been a less-than-willing participant in your friendship at the beginning of your relationship, but now he was glad to call you someone he was close to. His closest friend, really. 

His ears perk up when you mention Strauss. “Is she pulling you for undercover work?’ He starts to rant, already planning the tirade he’s going to deliver to Erin when he notices your demeanor change. You’re… shy, all of a sudden. You’ve never hidden from him before. He doesn’t like it. 

“She said the director tapped me for the field director position in Vegas,” You revealed. The sentence hit him like a punch in the gut.

“Wow,” is all he can manage to get out, fighting the way his throat threatens to close up. “And you’re going to take it?” He asks, although he knows the answer will break his heart. 

“I told her I needed some time to think about it.”

“What’s there to think about?’ He asked, allowing himself to hope for a moment that you’ll make some grand confession, to imagine for a moment that you might possibly feel the same way he does, to believe for a moment that he’s worthy of your love. But he’s not.

“Nothing. There’s absolutely nothing to think about at all,” you tell him, standing up and leaving with a forced casualness. 

Aaron had been married long enough to know that that tone and those words together mean the exact opposite of what they are supposed to mean-- but he was still confused. What could possibly make you stay? And how could he find it before you left? 

*****************

The following days between you and Aaron had been chilly, to say the least. You didn’t bounce ideas off of each other on cases like you normally would. You came to the opposite conclusions at every turn. You were out of sync, and everyone felt it. So when the case wrapped up on a Friday afternoon, you were more than happy to rush home to a bottle of wine, a pint of ice cream, your moving boxes and some trashy reality television.

You’d given up on packing after about an hour. Your heart just wasn’t in it. So instead, you lounged in your pajamas, sipping at your wine in the hopes that it would guide you to your first full night of sleep since you’d spoken with Strauss. You’re just about to head to bed when there’s a knock at your door. You swing it open, revealing Aaron, holding a bouquet of flowers in one hand and a bottle of champagne in the other. 

“I was an asshole.” He offers. “Am I interrupting anything, or?”

“Just packing,” you say, wanting to twist the knife a little bit even if it wasn’t truthful. Aaron is undeterred, and steps inside anyways. 

“I didn’t want you to leave with us still in the middle of the fight. You can be as mad as you want in the morning, but have a glass of champagne with me?” He asks, with those big brown eyes you could never refuse. 

“Fine,” you sighed, still easily won over by him, even when you were heartbroken and mad. 

“Here, you open it. Congratulations,” he tells you, handing over the bottle. You start picking at the foil, and he speaks up in the silence. “Things are going to be different without you, you know. I like that our team is structured the way it is… as a team, but you know, in a lot of ways, it was nice to have a partner in you.”

“You know, come to think of it, I’m not sure if I even have cups. They might be packed away,” you say, still picking at the foil and decidedly not looking Aaron in the eye. He chuckles a little at your comment.

 “I don’t know what I’m going to do when you’re gone. I mean, who else can rein in Derek, or get to see me the big picture, or talk Emily off the ledge when I’m sure she’s about to go rogue?’ 

“It’s going to be okay,” you tell him, setting the bottle on the counter, still unopened. Aaron heaves a sigh. 

“You should stay.” He says, after a moment. 

“What?” You say, blinking, because surely you must be drunk or dreaming or something else. 

“You should stay here. You don’t have to take the job in Vegas.” 

“Haha, very funny,” you joked, bringing your attention back to the bottle to avoid looking him in the eye. 

“I’m serious. Listen, I know I said there was nothing to think about, but I changed my mind.” 

“Oh, did you? And what if I haven’t changed mine?” You asked, getting angry now. 

Not able to hold back for another second, he takes your face in both of his hands and kisses you. “Just, think about that before you board a plane. Okay?” He says, and before you can even speak, you hear the door swing shut behind him. 

Damn you, Hotchner. 

You don’t sleep a wink.  When 8am finally rolls around, you pull yourself out of bed and get dressed, heading over to Aaron’s. As you buckle your seatbelt, you realize that you know you have to go over there but you have no clue what it is you even want to say to him. You hope you’ll figure it out without sounding completely insane as you knock on Aaron’s door, and he swings it open, still in his sweatpants and incredibly surprised to find you on his doorstep.

“I’m even more mad at you right now than I was last night,” you tell him by way of greeting.

“That’s understandable. I haven’t been very fair to you,” he agrees, and the fact that he’s being so reasonable only makes you angrier. You slip past him and step inside the apartment. 

“I don’t get it. You couldn’t just let me move on, start a new life and forget about the torch I’ve been burning for my boss the entire time I’ve worked here? You had to have the last word, even if I was leaving forever.” 

“No,” Aaron says, and you bite your tongue, trying to allow him a moment to respond even if you weren’t feeling all that gracious. “No, I couldn’t let you move on thinking the torch you were carrying ws unrequited.”

You’re struck by his words. “What are you trying to say?” 

“I’m sorry, it doesn’t matter. It’s a great opportunity for you in Vegas. I’m happy for you, and you shouldn’t let this--” 

“Hotch, what are you trying to say?”

“Just that I’m proud of you, and I know that you’ll do excellent work, and--”

“I don’t understand what you’re trying to hide from me.” You call him out, and he looks at you for a moment. This time, you don’t break his glance. 

“I’m not trying to hide. I’m just too late.” He tells you, looking down at the floor. 

“Tell me, Hotchner. Tell me, please.” You beg of him, shifting to try to get him to look you in the eye.

“I love you, and I figured it out too late.” 

You draw in a sharp breath, and he’s sure he’s ruined any vestiges of friendship that still existed between the two of you in this moment, and that you’ll board your plane to Las Vegas and he’ll become a creepy old boss that you never think about again. He takes a moment to look at you, a moment to mourn what might have been, a moment to remember the way your laugh made him smile while the memories were still fresh. He takes a moment, and then you speak up.

“No,” you correct him. “You figured it out just in time.”

tagging: @choppa-style @wanniiieeee @zheezs14 @torykjamie @maureen4y

@ssavanessa22 @isthatme-thatsme @g-l-pierce @ssahotchie @infinite-tides

 @itsmytimetoodream @averyhotchner @msmarvelsmain @hotforhotchner11 @hotchinkevlar

hi besties I tried to tag everyone who said they wanted to be on my regular hotch list and a few of y’all who regularly interact with the right but if i made a mistake/u want to be removed u can lmk I will not be offended!!!

[forever-rogue]

Hi! If you're taking requests can I please request a fluffy piece of where Javi and his f!partner fell in love and Javi brings her home to Texas for the first time to meet his Dad. And at some point his Dad sees them being so cute and sweet with eachother and he's never seen Javi so happy before.

A/N: Enjoy some fluff and softness!

Pairing: Javi x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2.3k

Warnings: mentions of pregnancy

MASTERLIST

JAVIER MASTERLIST

»»————-　♡　————-««

“You’re nervous,” Javier’s tone was filled with amusement as he walked into the bedroom to find you in front of the mirror, holding up two different outfit options. The look on your face was nothing but pure distress as you realized that one outfit was too formal and the other was almost too informal. Sighing, you turned to him with a pout on your lips as held up the outfits, “Dulzura - what’s going on?”

“I’m not nervous!” 

“I’ve known you for years, I know that look on your face,” he came over and took both hangers from your hands and tossed them on the bed. Large, warm hands found your face as he pulled you in for a gentle, saccharine kiss, “calma, mi alma.”

“I’m not nervous, Javier,” you scoffed indignantly as he quirked a brow in question, "I'm fucking terrified! I'm meeting your whole family today for the first time! How am I not supposed to be nervous?"

"It'll be fine-"

"At your cousin's wedding-"

"They're going to adore you-"

"They're meeting me - your fiance - for the first time. At a huge wedding. With your entire family there,” you huffed, feeling your churn at the mere thought of it all, “it’s a little scary, Javi. And I don’t want them to think I’m trying to take away attention from anybody. I don’t want to be that person.”

“You’ve taken down Escobar and Cali,” he laughed warmly before pulling you into his arms as you buried your face into his shoulder, “and you’re nervous about a wedding?”

“Much scarier,” it was a pathetic whimper in protest.

“They already know about you,” he reminded you gently, “it’s not like this is the first they’re hearing about you.”

“I know,” pulling back, you cast a dismal glance at the outfits that were unceremoniously dumped on your bed, “I just want them to like me. It’s your family, Javi, they’ll be my family too.”

“They’re going to love you,” he insisted with an air of finality before pressing a kiss to your forehead. You couldn’t help but grin at him; the two of you had been through so much together and apart, and you knew that you really could handle anything life through you at the two of you, but this seemed...different. Insurmountable. 

Gone were the days of chasing after criminals and bad guys through the streets and jungles of Colombia and in were the days of quiet, domestic bliss. You’d already started building a home in Texas with him, and taken on the simple life you’d been dreaming of for some time. Nothing was going to take that away from you and get it still terrified you. 

“I love you,” you whispered as he offered you the grin you had fallen in love with so long ago. His soft brown eyes crinkled in the corners as his single dimple made its appearance, “Javi.”

“I love you,” he promised, “come on, let’s finish getting ready and get this over with. I have a few plans for you tonight.”

“Mhmm,” you rested your hands on his broad chest before lightly pushing back, causing him to jokingly pout at you. As soon as you heard the world plans, something sparked within you and you immediately knew what you wanted to wear. Turning towards the closet, you offered him a cheeky wink before pulling out a lacy red dress. His eyes instantly widened at the sight of the dress; it had always been one of his favorites on you, “what do you think? Too much?”

“It’s perfect, Dulzra,” he had to work to hold back a groan as he pictured you in it, “you’re going to knock them dead.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

Of course, Javier had been right. His family had taken to you like fish to water. Almost as if they could sense that they might overwhelm you all at once, they came over in small droves to introduce themselves and welcome you to their family. Honestly, you didn’t even have to say much as they were happy to do all the talking and Javier was more than happy to talk - brag - about you in detail and tell them everything about you. You were practically glowing from the praise, and found it easy and effortless to find your place within it all. 

But the singular most important person was Chucho - Javier’s father. You hoped he would like you, hoped he would think you were good for his son, hoped he would know how much you loved Javier. 

You were sitting at the table, eating some dessert and chatting with one of Javier’s cousins, Adrianna, when you heard a throat clear from behind you. Turning around, you found Chucho offering you a small smile and extended his hand to you.

“Do you have a moment, mija?” he asked softly as you nodded. Of course you weren’t about to turn him down. Your heart thumped nervously as you nodded and stood up, taking his hand while you tried to calm your racing mind; this wasn’t anything bad, this was good and you had nothing to worry about. Still - it felt like a huge task. 

“Of course,” you offered up a nervous smile as you let him lead you outside of the small reception hall and out into the gardens. You had spotted Javier talking to a few people, a beer clutched in his hand, and a megawatt grin on his face as he laughed at something. It was enough to suck the air from your lungs as you realized just how much you loved this man. Your longing little glance wasn’t lost on Chucho, who simply laughed to himself. As soon as you stepped outside, you took in a long breath of fresh air. You were glad you had come to Texas with Javier; it was beautiful here and you were happy to build a home, a family - a life here. 

“You really love him, don’t you?” he asked as he sat down on one of the benches and beckoned for you to join him. A flush of warmth rose up in your chest and cheeks as you nodded and sat down next to him, “I can tell. He loves you too - won’t ever stop talking about you. And the way he looks at you...I’ve never seen him look at anyone like that before.”

“Not even-”

“Not even Lorraine,” he explained as you let a small sigh of relief as he laughed at you, “you have nothing to worry about, mija. Javier’s not going anywhere. Do you know about the first time he told me about you?”

“No,” you cringed slightly, remembering the beginning of your relationship - just your work relationship. Needless to say it was not love at first; the two of you were constantly at each other’s throats, always having to have the last word. It was a slow progression from rivals to friends to lovers; but when you started falling in love with him, it was fast and hard and there was no stopping it.  You never really believed in soul mates, or someone being the one, but with Javier...you just knew. He was the one and only for you. Just like he had changed your perspective on many things, you had caused him to completely change too. You made him in the best possible version of himself, he always claimed.

“Oh mija,” he laughed as he took a sip of his beer, “he called me and he was absolutely livid, he went on and on about the new partner he had, how he couldn’t stand her, how she was too much and he was positive she wouldn’t last.”

“Yeah, that sounds about right. Javi and I didn’t like each other for a long time,” you laughed; you still remembered the look on his face the day you had met him. It was anything but love back then, “we were at it for a long time. I didn’t know if we’d ever get along but...obviously things turned out very differently. I love him, a lot. More than anything really.”

“It’s obvious,” he agreed, “I can just see it in the way the two of you look at each other. He’s different now - better, more himself. You’ve helped him more than now.”

“He’s helped me too,” you admitted softly. The two of you had been through so much both separately and together - more darkness and demons than many people have ever seen. But it was like you always managed to chase the darkness away from one another, bringing in some light and love into each other’s lives in every which way,  I really don’t know what I’d do without him. I hope...I hope I have your blessing to marry your son. Nothing in the world would make me happier.”

“Of course,” he took your hand and gave it a gentle squeeze as you sniffled lightly in an attempt to hold back your tears, “our family is yours. Javier made the best choice ever with you.”

“You have no idea how much that means to me,” you grinned at him and suddenly the whole world seemed lighter. You knew that in the end you would stay with Javier, no matter what happened, but knowing you were so welcome in their family and already so loved made everything better, “I was so nervous at first...I know how much you mean to Javi, and it means a lot to me too.”

“You’re very important to us too,” he promised, “we’ve been looking forward to meeting you since the day he told us about you. Will you tell me one thing? And if Javier doesn’t know yet, I promise I won’t breathe a word to him…”

“What is it?” your heart leapt in your chest as you wondered what he could be asking you, although you had a feeling you knew. 

“When is my grand baby coming? When are you due?” as soon as he asked his question your jaw dropped and you looked at him with wide eyes. You weren’t even showing yet, and didn’t think it was that obvious, “oh come on, I had a wife once, and she had Javier. I’ve been around enough pregnant women to know when someone is expecting. Plus you didn’t touch a drop of alcohol - and that’s kind of apparent at a wedding. He doesn’t know, does he?”

“I found out a few weeks ago,” you admitted sheepishly, a hand subconsciously going to your belly, “I’m almost three months along. We weren’t planning it or not planning it, and it just happened. It took me by surprise too. But I...I’m so excited. Javier is going to be a great father and I’m so excited to share all of this with him. I never thought I wanted all of this - a husband, a child, a home and a family but...I do. With Javier. Sure, things aren’t always perfect, but I wouldn’t want anyone else.”

“Kids in love,” he laughed lightly as you shrugged in agreement, “when are you going to tell him?”

“Do you think I should tell Javier now?”

“Tell Javier what?” at the sound of his familiar voice, you turned around and found Javier walking up to the two of you. You looked nervously at Chucho for what to do, but he just jerked his head in Javier’s direction and nodded, “what’s wrong, Dulzura?”

“Javi,” you stood up and reached for his hand, which he eagerly took and laced his fingers together with yours. You kissed his cheek before softly whispering, “I have something big to tell you.”

“Something big to tell me?” he asked with a raised eyebrow, “what - you’re nervous again...it’s not like we’re going to have a baby or anything!”

At his declaration, your mouth dropped and you gaped at him like a fish out of water for a few moments. Noticing your hesitation, his face went through a series of expressions, “umm...Javier? You’re going to be a father, my love. So yes, it is like we’re having a baby.”

“Seriously?” he asked in surprise as his hands went to either side of your face and he wiped away the few tears that had rolled down your cheeks, “Dulzura…”

“Surprise,” you grinned at him before he kissed you, “are you happy, Javi? Please tell me you’re happy.”

“I am perfect,” his reassurance was gentle and soft as he nuzzled his nose against yours, “this is everything I never knew I wanted. I love you so much.”

“I love you too, Javier.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

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[tomorrow-and-tomorrows]

SNK 139.5: Towards the Final Pages with no Final Answers

The final pages of the updated ending are bold, but I think ultimately more evocative than the original preliminary ending.

Even after the intensely polarized reader reception that took issue with the lack of storytelling precision and clarity when it was most needed, SNK chose to end with a decisively ambiguous symbol. In literature, a symbol is something that clearly means something -- but with the most "literary" symbols, their meaning cannot be absolutely defined; any attempted answer as to what a symbol represents has no finality or certainty, and interpretation will remain ever open to debate. A symbol both invites and resists interpretation.

Naturally, the immediate response to the symbolic tree on the final page is to try answering the invitation to the question, "What does it mean?"

One prominent answer I've seen is that it symbolizes the continuation of the cycle of war and violence either because a) of the symbolic parallel to Ymir or b) on a more literal level, that it implies the actual potential revival of new era of Titans. A reasonable interpretation either way, but also, I think, an incomplete one.

The first reason for this is that "the endless cycle of war" was already clearly and powerful represented in the preceding panels:

The cycle of war was already continuing in the decades or centuries before the child arrived at the tree. A culminating image symbolizing the persistence or resurgence of an era of war as the final panel would thus arguably be redundant and unnecessary.

Furthermore, the chapter is entitled "Toward the Tree on That Hill." If the tree were simply a symbol of war, by implication the chapter could equally be called 'toward the endless cycle of war'. But such a relentlessly bleak and tonally flat ending sentiment would be firmly incongruous with the story's recurrent conviction in the equal cruelty and beauty of the world -- a conviction that I believe it has been faithful to all the way to its end.

The Long Defeat

But while on this topic of war, let's linger a moment on the "cruelty" side and the consequence of this wordless construction and subsequent destruction of a city -- the most bold and possibly controversial additional panels that are also my personal favourite additions.

One objection that has emerged against this brief sequence of Paradis' apparent destruction is that it renders the entire story to be "pointless". Eren's 80% Rumbling, Armin's diplomatic peace talks between the remnants of the Allied Nations and Paradis, and before that, the proposal of the 50-year plan and Zeke's euthanasia plan... everything, to the very beginning to the Survey Corps' dreams of some kind of freedom; was it all for nothing? All that striving, that hope, that final promise bestowed upon Armin: was it all a pointless story? Even more radically, is the story suggesting that Eren might as well have continued the Rumbling to 100% of the earth? Was Zeke's euthanasia plan the cruel but correct choice all along? What was the point of rejecting the 50-year plan if that had a greater chance of success at preventing this outcome?

I think Isayama suddenly pulling back to such a long-term view of history to the scale of decades or even centuries into the future calls for a reorientation in attitude towards exactly what kind of story we have been reading. Yes, if the metric is Paradis' survival, maybe it was indeed all "pointless". But that's also to say that, on the broadest scale, SNK is a story about futility, that it is a deliberate representation of the struggle to make one's actions historically meaningful.

In the long view of history, all the events, from Grisha running beyond the wall to see the airships and the first breaking of Wall Maria to Erwin's sacrifices, Paradis' discovery of the outside world, and finally to the Battle of Heaven and Earth, it would all merely be a handful of chapters in the history textbooks of the future. A future in which war and geopolitical conflict will continue even without Titans. That does not mean that all paths to the future are equal -- the 50-year plan would not have put an end to Titans, and Zeke's euthanasia plan distorts utilitarian ethics into just another form of oppression; there are better and worse decisions that lead to more and less degrees of suffering, but no decision can ever be the final one.

The additional panels remind us that in history, there never exists a singular "Final Solution". The reason there are readers who vehemently support Eren to have flattened 100% of the world, and the reason the Paradisians supported the oppressive, authoritarian, proto-fascist Jaegar Faction under Floch and even after the Rumbling, is that because they want to believe that a Final Solution to end conflict exists and will work. They resist the fundamental uncertainty and complexity of the situation, instead preferring a singular, unified, and coherent Answer to Paradis' struggle to survive. I'm reminded of the scholar Erich Auerbach's theorization of why fascism appealed to many people during periods of political and social crisis, change, and uncertainty. Writing in exile after fleeing Nazi Germany, he observed that:

"The temptation to entrust oneself to a sect which solved all problems with a single formula, whose power of suggestion imposed solidarity, and which ostracized everything which would not fit in and submit - this temptation was so great that, with many people, fascism hardly had to employ force when the time came for it to spread through the countries of old European culture." (from Mimesis p. 550)

This acutely describes the Jaegar Faction's rise to power and continued dominance in Paradis. But their promise of unity, of a single formula to wipe out the rest of the world either literally through the Rumbling, or to dominate them with military force, is a false one. Even if Eren had Rumbled 100% of the world instead of 80%, history would still go on. The external threat of the world may have been eliminated, but internal conflict and violence would still continue onward throughout the generations born on top of the blood of the rest of the world. Needless to say, out of all the options, Eren's 80% Rumbling is the very epitome of perpetuating the cycle of violence as it creates tens of thousands of war orphans like Eren once was, and it would justify employing violence for one's own self-interest to an extreme degree. For the generations to come that would valourize Eren as a hero, it would set a dangerous precedent for what degree of destruction is acceptable for self-defence -- nothing short of the attempt to flatten the entire world. It is no surprise that Paradis would meet a violent end when its founding one-party rule of the Jaegar Faction has their roots in such unapologetically bloody foundations.

Neither the 80% Rumbling nor the militaristic, ultra-nationalistic Jaegar faction that come to govern Paradis are glamourized as the "correct" solution to ensuring Paradis' future. (This can also put to rest any accusations of SNK's ending as "fascist" or "imperialist" propaganda, since the island's modern nation that they founded ends in war. All nations must fall eventually, but not all do in such blatant destruction). Importantly, neither is Armin's diplomatic mission naively idealized as that which permanently achieves world peace. No singular or unifying formula can work because reality is complicated. Entrusting oneself to seemingly simple Answers is simply insufficient, even if they are ideals of peaceful negotiation; that method may work given the right conditions, but the world will always eventually complicate its feasibility.

After all in the real world, there's the absurd irony that some in the West had called the First World War "The War to End all Wars". These days, WWI is merely one long chapter in our textbooks just a few pages away from the even longer chapter of the Second World War that is followed by all the rest of the conflicts that have followed since then even with the establishment of diplomatic organizations like the United Nations. In this sense, showing Paradis' eventual downfall is perhaps the only way to end such a series that is so concerned with history, from King Fritz's tribal expansion into empire, the rise and fall of Marleyan ascendency, and finally of the survival and apparent shattering of Paradis.

From its beginning to its end, SNK has poignantly evoked J.R.R. Tolkien's conception of history as The Long Defeat. In one character's words, "together through ages of the world we have fought the long defeat". That is to say, "no victory is complete, that evil rises again, and that even victory brings loss".

No heroes, only humans

Eren's desperate, fatalistic resignation to committing the Rumbling, along with the characters' rejection of all the rest of the earlier plans to ensure Paradis a future, are merely the actions of human beings to that began with the need to find not even necessarily a Final Answer, but at least an acceptable and feasible one for the time being. But the characterization of Eren's confusion, childishness, and regret in the final chapter is startlingly real in how it demonstrates how, all along, we have been dealing not with grand heroes, but simply people who have no answers at all. SNK has always been about failures - and often ironic failures; it has always been a story about painful and frequently futile struggle.

People make mistakes, they can be short-sighted, selfish, biased, immature, petty, and irrational, and I think the ending follows through with depicting the consequences of that.

Erwin's self-sacrifice before being able to reach the basement (and his regression to a childhood state in the moments before his death), Kenny's futile chasing after that universal compassion he had seen in Uri, Shadis never being acknowledged by history despite his final heroic action, and so on -- these stories of ironic, futile failures are still meaningful in their mere striving. Eren's ending and Paradis' demise despite Armin's endeavour to ensure them a peaceful future are entirely consistent with this.

SNK certainly follows the shounen trope in which young individuals are bestowed great power and correspondingly great responsibility, and must then reconcile the burden of possessing that greatness on which the fate of the world depends. Yet it is equally defined by its representation of the state that us normal human beings confront everyday: the struggle against the apparent powerlessness to enact any meaningful or lasting change at all. Simultaneously, this helpless state does not exempt us from the responsibility to act in whatever small capacity we are able to resist oppression, ideological extremism, and the perpetuation of violence.

Towards That Symbol

That was a rather long but vital digression about the additional "construction and destruction" pages. To return to the issue of the symbolism in the final panel, here I will turn from seemingly affirming the tree as symbolizing the cycle of violence, towards what I think is the greater complexity of what the tree might "actually" symbolize.

As I've said above, I don't believe that the final chapter title is synonymous with 'toward the endless cycle of war'. In tone, theme, and characterization, SNK has always been defined by the tension between cruelty and beauty, the will to violence and the underlying desire for peace, and the rest of the contradictory impulses that all simultaneously coexist. The end of SNK as a whole commits to a similar lack of closure, ambiguity, and interpretive openness.

So far I have rambled on about only a view of the perpetual "cruelty" of history. Where, then, is the "beauty"?

In short, the "tree = cycle of violence" interpretation is obviously based on how that this tree recalls the original tree in which the spine creature, as the source of the power of the Titans, resided. But it's worth first considering, what exactly is this creature? We seem to get our answer in the chapter that most precisely crystallizes the dual "cruelty and beauty" of the world:

The spine creature might be said to be life itself. Or more specifically, the will of life to perpetuate itself, for no reason at all but for the fleeting moments in which we feel distinctly glad to have existed in the world.

The creature at the source of the Titans, and in extension the Titans themselves, is neither inherently a positive or negative, "good" or "evil", creative or destructive force. It's both and all of those at once. As with any power, the Titans were merely a tool that was put to use to oppressive ends.

So as I now suggest that the tree at the end is symbolically a "Tree of Life", I don't at all mean "life" in the typically celebratory or optimistic sense: rather, I mean it in the ambiguous, ambivalent, uncertain, and complex sense that has been evoked throughout the above discussion of the inevitable continuation of war.

The title "Toward The Tree on That Hill" is derived from its associations with Eren and Mikasa, but more specifically of course, from Armin's affirmation of existence. However, the tree as a symbol of existential affirmation is undercut with the revelation that, despite Armin's diplomatic mediation between the Allied Nations and Paradis, the island nation never escapes war just as no nation in the history of the earth has ever fully escaped war.

The image of Armin running toward that life-affirming tree by the end becomes twisted and complicated, as the image of the anonymous child approaching the Tree of Life evokes both awe at its beauty and grandeur, and a deep dread at the foreboding of its cyclical return to Ymir's tree that signalled the beginning of a bloody era.

And I think that is precisely it: Life is not some idealized, beautiful vision that we always want to run toward; it is also ironic, complicated, and dreadful. It is ambivalent. Like a literary symbol, the meaning of life cannot be pinned down absolutely. The tree therefore becomes itself a symbol of uncertainty, of an open future that is cyclical both in its beauty and war.

As a final observation, it is surely no coincidence that, the small, black, birdlike silhouettes of the war planes destroying the city from the sky is replaced by the similarly small black silhouettes of birds in the final panel.

If the birds represent freedom from war, the irony is that the immediately surrounding land appears to be one completely empty of people save for the exploring child; it is a freedom attained only without people's presence. Yet at the same time, a child from some existing civilization has reached it; perhaps it is freedom that they have reached, perhaps it is something else that they see in the tree. What is it that they were looking for? What does the tree and its history represent for the child, and what does it mean for their future? Alternatively, does the child-in-the-forest imagery negatively recall the warning that the world is one huge forest of predator and prey that we need to protect children from entering?

Rather than providing answers, this tree embodies all of the potential questions, and all of the potential answers. These possibilities will unfold themselves into an uncertain future beyond the chapters of history that Eren, Armin, Mikasa, Zeke, Erwin, and all the rest of the characters were part of and left their mark on; and whatever future this child will witness or create, it will similarly be one of the struggle against futility, as the journey begins anew with each generation in every new era. Neither - or both - hopeful or despairing, the final image of this tree, just like life itself, contains those innumerable irresolvable tensions as it gestures towards all possibilities, both oppressive and free.