#otherwise i'm just going to keep marinating forever

[sayheykid]

i genuinely don't think a story's worldbuilding and lore has ever drawn me in the way that check please did. it's been years and i still think about it every day. the characters and plot were always superb but i think what has stuck with me the most is the depth of the settings and how everything feels so lived in and tangible. everyone wants to make a fake world and town and university but no one else has EVER done it that well

[3cremepie3]

Airhead pt. 1

Synopsis - Riddle Rosehearts x fem reader. Y/n is an idiot and needs help with studying from Riddle! She wants to pay back his kindness in the only way she know how.

Warnings - innocent riddle, lose of innocence, graphic mentions of head lol, premarital sex, cursing, spit, roughness, slutty y/n, bimbo y/n

A/n - I was supposed to start this series so long ago but I got caught up in request. I found this so fun to write and I will be continuing it!

“Hey riddle,” you exclaimed. You pulled him in for a big hug he deserved it for being so generous. He was helping you study for free! “There’s no need for that.” His words were harsh but his smile said otherwise. Whatever you let him go and plopped down on his bed.

“Wow, it’s so soft I can lay here forever.” You will not now up at once,” he demanded. “In order to get optimal study results students sit at desks. I have a perfectly organized one here.” You sighed getting up to sit at his desk. The chair was cool against your ass cheeks that hung out your dress.

It was uncomfortable and for some reason forced you to sit up. “Now let us begin I have tea time to attend to and I’ll leave you for independent study time then.” Okay,” you accepted. The session didn’t even start yet and you were bored. "Yawning already? Did you not get a good night's rest?"

"No, I stayed up all night waiting on a flash sale." Well, that was idiotic,' He claimed. "When your dorm has no AC you make do with what you can get, look isn't it cute."

"My god," Riddle gasped. "Isn't that lingerie women wear that for their husbands and as far as I know you aren't married." You erupted into a fit of giggles. God, he was over dramatic! “Riddle you're too innocent for your own good," you laughed. "I'm just wearing it to bed what's the harm in that?"

"You're right." He cleared his throat and stepped away to grab a hefty text book. "Hand me your phone there must be no distractions." You were hesitant but handed it over. Riddle grabbed a chair and scooted over towards you. Your body moved closer to his wanting to marinate in his scent. "Wow, you smell so nice Riddle like roses."

"Well thank you I make sure to use rosemary oil and- what are you doing get back to reading at once!" He pointed to the paragraph your eyes finished scanning. "I already finished," you pouted. "Fine then let's get started on this written response."

"The teacher wants you to write this in a formal format so no personal perspective." He continued to yap on and on about something that you couldn't bother to hear as you were distracted by the flamingos running across the yard. "Get him." You cheered leaning out the window to watch the mayhem between students and flamingos concur.

In an instant, you flashed him the short dress that you wore hiked up your back. “You mustn’t lean over like everything is showing,” Riddle yelled. He covered his eyes wanting to keep your privacy. “Ace he went that way,” you pointed. You felt the air on your ass and quickly realized what Riddle had been yelling about.

“Oops my ass was out,” you giggled. “It’s not funny Y/n!” Come on Riddle you act like you’ve never seen anyone’s panties before.” He stared at you blankly. “Wait you genuinely haven’t?” His face became rosy red at your question. “Well, not in real life of course.”

“Christ how is anyone this pure,” you wondered. “My mother kept me very sheltered from a lot of things.” So you’ve never watched porn?” He held his head low not meeting your bright eyes. “ How is that your first thought no I have not.” We’ll have you ever had a girlfriend or a side hoe or a hookup?”

“No I don’t have time for any of that,” he admitted. “I guess remaining top student comes with its downfalls.” You frowned for Riddle. You couldn’t imagine not getting laid. Just then you thought of something. “Well, Riddle since you gave me your time helping me study I’ll give you mine in bed?” You watched him awaiting his answer. “But mother says only married couples do that.”

You slapped your forehead out of frustration. “Mother means married couples stick it in. No one said we have to do all of that.” I suppose there’s no harm since it’ll be a fair exchange and as long as it’s done before tea time.”

“Yup just the perfect pace,” you gleamed. Now why don’t we get on the bed,” you suggested. “Alright.” Oh wow Riddle I’m surprised you’re agreeing to this.” Well, you only live once they say.” He propped himself up on his elbows wanting to face you.

“This process is for relaxation you can lay fully down.” He laid back sinking into his many pillows. “Good boy now take off your clothes.” You heard his breath hitch at the thought but his hands were eager to make them come undone. He stopped at his underwear, however. “Need help or something.” Your hand graced over his bulge and then to the band of his boxers.

“I think that would be best,” he admitted. You couldn’t help but notice his hands shaking. “Aww Riddle don’t be nervous. You sat up to give him some kisses on his burning torso. “It’s just a little dick-sucking,” you reminded. “I know but I’ve never done anything like this before.”

“Well, then I’ll take things slower if you need it.” You began to kiss him softly he was a beginner after all. The first few were awkward teeth colliding but cute as you shared drool. The next ones were better since you took control catching his tongue in yours. You broke apart letting him catch his breath.

His hands tangled themselves in your hair pulling you back in. You balanced yourself on the bed before pulling your hips over his. Now you straddled his lap and could feel his heat against you. Riddle pulled up your dress which caused a gasp to come from your lips.

“Are you eager now?” Yes.” You looked up to see a riddles face flushed in a shade of scarlet. “Fine then I’m gonna go back down here. You crawled back to his legs making sure to land in an arch. Riddle thought he would lose his mind seeing the peak of your ass on full display. You pulled down his boxers to clearly see his mental state.

“Aww look at you dripping,” you coddled. "You can touch it i see you staring." Oh okay," he hesitated. You felt a hand collide with your ass cheek. He rubbed the flesh gently afterwards although it was an apology. You were gonna let out a protest but his focused face was too cute to pass up. You let a glob of spit coat his tip. You scanned his reaction as it slid down to his base.

His breath hitched at the warmness. Soon your mouth would follow the direction of the spit swallowing him down until you gagged. You exited with a pop making his toes curl. "So how's your first time getting head feel?" Good now continue," he demanded. His hand pushed you down onto his waiting dick.

You felt it twitch in your mouth as your tongue followed every curve every vein its entire being. "Oh my god," Riddle huffed. "Your cocks so cute look at it shake for me." You let it rest and spasm on your cheek. Your face had become wet with spit and his pre but you didn't mind. "Taste so good baby," you mumbled. Riddle could only bite his thumb down in response to holding his moans.

Your hand left his thigh to assist you in pumping him. Your grip was strong bringing his balls to tingle. Your lips noticed as you licked against the masses. And it intensified as you juggled them both in your mouth. He looked down on you astonished at your sinful actions.

Your dress was soaked but you were only just getting started. "Change of plans I want you to throat fuck me." Riddle looked at you like a lost puppy. "What does that mean." After quickly giving him a rundown he got into position. "So like this." He asked while pushing himself into your pulsing throat. Your hand linked themselves on his hips bringing him to push himself even deeper.

Riddle let out a grunt at the sensation of you squeezing around him. "Fuck it's like you're sucking me in." You chuckled you'd never think you'd get to hear Riddle RoseHearts curse. His hips buckled back and forth drilling themselves into you. But you still felt as though he was going to be soft on you.

"Riddle here's your chance to ruin me, to take all anger and stress out on me, to manhandle me. You're a man right then prove it to me." You spoke while scattering cock kisses. Riddle scoffed he was tired of everyone second-guessing him because he was small. "While since you give me permission I shall do my best job at it."

His smile twisted into a cruel smirk. You could tell in his head he had felt as though he was back in charge of the monarchy. While really you were still the dominant you just loved getting throat fucked. His hands raced to grab your neck forcing you to collide with the end of his shaft. You felt his hair tickle your nose while you gagged heavenly.

Riddle couldn't get enough of the vibrations against his core and forced you to stay until he watched your eyes roll back. You coughed greatly after being freed but stars were in your excited eyes as the same fate occurred. You watched Riddle lose himself in the contractions of your throat.

He moaned loudly as he pumped you like a fleshlight. They became whimper and he let out mewls that sounded as though he was crying. It was music to your ears especially when his voice that was sure to go raw yelled "Y/n" a dozen times. If he kept this up your throat would organize his shape forever.

And you wouldn't mind as long as you heard his whimper audio. "So good I think I'm gonna." He tried to give you a warning but it was too late. His cum poured down your throat leaving you to swallow the best you could in the short amount of time you had. The excess liquid spilled down your face and his now empty balls. He finally let go of his grip which allowed you to move away from the monster that was his cock.

You had 100% slayed that beast as he softened in front of your eyes. You pulled the bottom of your dress down ignoring the wet patch your essence had left on his bed. "Now we both held our fair end of the exchange." You spoke your voice raspy while removing your dress and stealing one of Riddle's shirts.

"Yes if you ever need help again be sure to let me know," he exclaimed. "Mhmm I'd love to push things even further. What your mother knows doesn't hurt her Riddle. It's not sin if its secret!”

[kit-williams]

I'm finally playing a Black Crusade Game

SO yesterday we finally started a Black Crusade game from our forever DM! Whom hates Black Crusade... but he was feeling 40k.

So the game is Me, my husband, and our other mutual friend who in the game is named Mec. Mec isn't a fan of 40k rpgs we (me, my husband, and our friend) all got introduced to warhammer via Warhammer Fantasy 2e (so we're all biased)

But this is the game i was going to be a space marine but no this isnt the Dog Centaur night lord this is Khornite Blood Angel! Angelos! errr Angela.

See Mec wanted a few concessions since we're going to be dealing with a lot of space marines that why can't there be female space marines so I was given the option to swap Angelos to Angela which I did (Hubby has filled my DMs with Mommy Angela) (also cuz he is a DM who will genderlock stuff but he will also allow you to do very interesting stuff with gender like allowing my one Fantasy character to be genderfluid but it also made sense due to how Fantasy Norsca works and because of how actual viking society worked) [reeling in the tangent!]

SO I'm a Khornite Berserker [Tome of Blood Starting Class] Fallen Blood Angel named Angela

I made a great first impression in the chaos city we landed in and thus scaring away the "welcoming committee" by watching one man get shot and then going over to the dying man and ripping out his throat and drinking his blood.

I got bullied by an Ancient Night Lord (which I failed the test to id him as being either a Night Lord or Alpha Legion ((Which to be fair is a safe guess))) who basically outed me as a Blood Angel and told everyone to be aware of me (aka I have the Betrayer Talent) did the whole "You keep my father's name out of your dirty mouth" but otherwise was hissy at him I'm around 200 years old I am a baby to that man I wasn't going to fight an established Night Lord.

But after getting bullied everyone in the Eye of Terror(?) got a vision that on this planet was the keys to the next crusade which will happen in the next century. So everything exploded into violence!

So at the moment we are gathering troops right now we've got some gangers and mutants but I am the Warband's only Space Marine which we will have to fix as well as getting us a ship too

We're going to play again tonight because we had a lot of fun and our DM wants to get us off planet.

ALSO

We've been playing Warhammer Fantasy 4e which has this cool Advantage mechanic which for normal Cubical 7 games if you do a successful parry no matter the degrees of success you just avoid it completely... this leads to Black Crusade and Dark Heresy and I think also Rogue Trader combat to fucking DRAG ON. We introduced the advantage system which means that if you attack me with only 1 degree of success but I parry with 1 or more degrees higher THEN I avoid the attack. But if your attack has more degrees of success than my parry then in fantasy I'm allowed to reduce the damage. But we're just using advantage to speed up the combat and it worked.

Anyway I'll give you an update on the Harbingers of the Apocalypse on our quest to be amazing.

As long as there are no Iron Warriors thrown my way I should be fine

[omegathetaone]

Welcome to the Omega System ｡･:*˚:✧｡

Hey! We're the Omega System (also known as ΩΘ1/Omega or Theta in short), and we are a self diagnosed traumagenic system. The full DNI list will be written below, however note that we are expressly anti-endo/tulpa as they make us very uncomfortable! Below you will find our DNI list, frequent fronters, sign offs, and more! Please, please give it a read before interacting with us! Especially the DNI list, if nothing else!

This post is subject to updates at any time, so make sure to check here to keep yourself up to date! (Long Post under the cut <3)

The Basics & BYF

We use we/us and I/me interchangeably We are autistic, a minor, and bodily a trans man We are a self diagnosed osdd/did system but we can't tell which kind of system we are even after extensive research (we are leaning towards OSDD-1b)

We are a fictive heavy system We are a masc-identity heavy system The majority of our system is queer

We collectively go by Omega or Theta online. Outside of that we use the body's name (we will not be sharing it here) We collectively use He/It pronouns, so if you don't know who's fronting or are referring to us in general just use those pronouns

We block very liberally

We will delete posts as we so choose. One day you might see it, the next it could be gone. Sorry if this causes any confusion!

We struggle with self-acceptance at times to please be patient with us. We're doing our best to get out of that mindset but it's not an easy process

Don't be afraid to let us know if someone is problematic! If we reblog from someone unknowingly then letting us know would be greatly appreciated so we can block them and correct our mistake!

Boundaries

We prefer to interact with people who are at least 16, so if you are younger than that you will be on thin ice with us unless if we're mutuals.

General rule, please don't refer to us as "plural" or to our headmates as "parts". We don't feel comfortable with these terms.

We are open to most questions about being a system, how our system works, or anything else that might be on your mind! We love answering questions (though don't expect this from other systems online- they don't have to share anything if they don't want to).

Our DMs are open unless stated otherwise. If another system needs someone to talk to or is looking for a system friend, then you can come to us! Keep in mind though- we will stop communication and/or block you if we feel super uncomfortable!

We aren't a roleplay account. Please don't try to roleplay with us unless if it's a fandom thing we agreed to and not "oh you have a fictive of x character!", because it makes us uncomfortable.

Interests

Some Media/Shows/Movies that we really enjoy!

Star Wars: The Clone Wars (+ TBB)

Heartstopper

Transformers

Demon Slayer, Naruto, + many more

Detroit: Become Human

Resident Evil (Video Games, not movies)

Subnautica

Destiny (Video Games, both 1 and 2)

Arcane (The Show)

Hades

Red Vs. Blue

Some more obscure ones are...

Orwell: Keeping an Eye on You

In Sound Mind (Video Game)

Firewatch

Some of my other interests include...

The Horror Genre

Cryptids, SCPs, Analogue Horror, and other things of that nature

Music + Composition

Sound Design

Art

Chemistry

History

Geography

Marine Biology

Marching Band (Marching music my beloved)

Learning new instruments (I'm up to 5 now I think)

Writing (I blame fandoms for this)

Of course some of these can vary depending on who's fronting but they are generally pretty consistent? For the most part anyway.

Favorite current songs...

Mayday mayday! by Biometrix

Downfall by NEONI

Outlaw by NEONI

Wonderland by NEONI

Big Guns by NEONI (can you tell we like Neoni?)

E.T. cover by Rain Paris

Beautiful is Boring by BONES UK

THE DEATH OF PEACE OF MIND by BAD OMENS

Underground by Unlike Pluto and 8 Graves

There's more, but the list would be going on forever lol

DNI

You are free to interact if you aren't anywhere on the list below (and if you don't break any boundaries of ours). That being said, DNI if you are...

endo/tulpa or a supporter

transphobe/homophobe/bigot

fakeclaimer

anti-mogai

anti-alterhuman

anti-neo/xenopronouns and genders

transid/transage/transrace

gendercritical

anti-informed self dx

zoophile/MAP/pedophile/proship etc.

anti-semetic

white supremasists/nazis

syscourse

racists of any kind

pro-life/anti-abortion

Anti-Paraphilia recovery

terf/swerf/radqueer/radfem, etc.

Other things to note here:

If you participate in cringe culture, or harass/call other people 'cringe' for doing what they like, I don't want to see you on my blog.

I will block blank blogs because of tumblr bots, so if you don't want that to be you then please make your blog look HUMAN and not a part of that mess.

I do not want to interact with HP fans/stans. Based on the rest of my DNI, the reason should be obvious. If not, just leave, y'all make me uncomfortable.

If you think that all systems have to sign off on every message and/or constantly let you know who's fronting, realize that just...isn't true. We like signing off a lot of posts because that's how we roll, but that doesn't mean other systems have to give you that window into themselves. Hell- we don't have to either if we aren't feeling it.

Once again, don't bring syscourse here. It makes us very, very uncomfortable.

Frequent Fronters

Max (He/It) - Host

Desmond (He/Him) - Co-host

Charlie (He/Him) - Sexual Protector (Kind of? He's our resident romance king)

The Omega System Member Sign-Off Legend

This isn't everyone, but it's the main ones who like speaking on tumblr and social media in general (for the most part)

✧ 🌌 - System tag

✧ 💤 - Max

✧ 💼 - Desmond

✧ 💌 - Charlie

✧ 💕 - Charlie (aka Char)

✧ 📜 - Alexandre (Aka Alex)

✧ 🩸 - Aurelius (aka AZ)

✧ 🎧 - Axel

✧ 🪀 - Chris

✧ 🔪 - Felix

✧ 🌗 - Domino

✧ 🐻 - Harley

✧ 🔥 - Kyo

✧ 🌠 - Sam

✧ 👑 - King

✧ 💣 - Fuse

✧ 🦋 - Kode (Pronounced Cody)

✧ 🐕 - Nick

✧ 🌹 - Nines

✧ 🐏 - Sebastian (aka Seb or Sebs)

✧ 🕷 - Weaver

✧ 🕸 - Xeno

✧ ✈ - Aileron

✧ 🖤 - Vox

✧ 🌧 - Apollo

✧ 💿 - Taz

✧ 🌙 - Soren

✧ 👻 - Talon

✧ 🧊 - Melvin (aka Mel)

✧ 🕊 - Marcel

✧ 🎵 - Liam

✧ 🎮 - Mustard

✧ 🌳 - Aspen

✧ 🌑 - Anakin

Userboxes

(from @/sysboxes)

(from @/sysboxes

(from @/sysboxes)

[smallblueandloud]

20 questions for 20 writers

@arithmonym didn't tag me explicitly in this meme, but i thought it was really cool, so i'm gonna do it too! you can read emma's answers to the meme here.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

72! in reality i think it's 73, because one of my fics is currently anonymous (i just didn't want it attached to my account -- it's not hard to track down via my blog). considering making a few more anonymous, we'll see.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

298,580! my next fic will probably push me over 300k

3. What fandoms do you write for?

oh god. it might be easier to ask what fandoms i DON'T write for. currently... a lot of doctor who, star trek, star wars, and x-men. not too surprising if you know me and my interests. i have ongoing series for the west wing and MCU that i keep returning to, although i don't write for those fandoms very much otherwise.

speed round of fandoms i'll probably write for again at some point: leverage, librarians, locked tomb, steven universe, the muppets (maybe?), and les mis.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

i'll take your part when darkness comes (Doctor Who, 2018): dimension hopping!rose fic, nonlinear narrative, eventually ended up being a journey's end fix-it. this is one of those fics i'd love to rewrite if i ever had the time, just so i got to spend more time in its world.

ain't water under the bridge (Doctor Who, 2018): series 5 rewrite where 11 talks about rose just as much as 10 talked about her, with a fluffy ending. this is one of my oldest fics, so i can't bring myself to reread it, but i'm still very fond of the concept.

in blackwater woods (Doctor Who, 2020): 6x11 "the god complex" rewrite where we find out what 11's worst fear is and it's rose. for such an old fic, i am still really proud of this one -- i think it turned out really, really well, even considering how long ago it was written, and i like how canon-adjacent it was.

good times never seemed so good (Doctor Who, 2020): 11, amy, and rory run into 10 and rose and amy and rory realize that the doctor loves rose and always has. lol are you noticing a pattern

sit there in your heartache (Star Trek: Strange New Worlds, 2023): mariner and boimler are Not Great at hiding the future existence of spirk from spock. i wrote this RIGHT after the time travel episode came out so i really rode the wave of post-episode enthusiasm. this is my first (and only!) fic to get podfic'ed!

it is SO INTERESTING to me how all of these are outsider POV fics. the top 4 being doctor/rose doesn't surprise me at all. none of their premises are super original, especially #1, 2, and 4 -- i have read a billion fics with the exact same premises and i would read a billion more. we have consistent taste, the doctor/rose fandom does.

5. Do you respond to comments?

yes! i try to get to them within a month, although that often doesn't end up happening.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angiest ending?

rose dies at the end of just look and you will see, so, y'know.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

oh, man. many of my fics are really fluffy. i would say... don't wanna see you go (but it's not forever), which is a mockumentary-style exploration of the x-men's 20th anniversary, inspired by the starkid 10cumentary. i just want them all to be safe and happy!!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not generally, knock on wood. i did get someone accusing me of biphobia for calling the spock/christine romance in SNW comphet, but the fic had spock himself recognizing that he wasn't actually attracted to her, and also the comphet was in the tags, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ what are you gonna do

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

nope!

10. Do you write crossovers?

yes!! LOVE writing crossovers. my favorite one i've written so far is the one where guinan and jenkins make friends. i'd love to write more in the future!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not to my knowledge!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

not to my knowledge, sadly.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yes, but nothing that ever got published! finx @aethersea and i worked on a leverage/librarians crossover together FOREVER ago but it didn't get very far. i would love to give it another shot someday but we'd have to have writing habits that mesh well.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

oh dear. i'm also a pretty strong multishipper. i think i'll say ONE of my favorite ship DYNAMICS which is a divorced/otherwise broken up couple who still love each other dearly and know each other so, so well and wish things had been different but understand why they can't be. you guys can imagine how my eyes lit UP when the muppets ABC established piggy and kermit's breakup.

15. What's one WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

...sorry guys.

16. What are your writing strengths?

uhhh. i guess... i like my characterization? i like the work i put into making sure that characters are acting in-character and for a good reason. i'm also very proud of my dialogue.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

pacing remains a struggle. i always have a lot of ideas and thoughts and i try to cram them in and It Gets Bloated. i also struggle to communicate real-world movements, expressions, etc -- i feel like i always end up like that one "she sighed" "he sighed" "she inhaled" "he exhaled" post.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i'm generally against writing it, at least in this point of my life. i think it's very cool in contexts where you have a bilingual audience (i love you, ¿qué pasa USA?), but i don't like the idea of having to do footnotes or something else to translate dialogue that is readable to me. i HATE when english language fics have their non-english lines in italics, it feels so othering.

i'm writing a fic rn that has a lot of spanish dialogue and i'm experimenting with translating the dialogue but not as direct quotations -- we're getting the meaning through the narration of the POV character, who's doing the translating herself. i think that's my favorite way to get around it right now.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

doctor who, surprising no one! afterimage was the first fic i ever wrote and i immediately posted it on fanfiction.net. i have never changed.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

wow saving the hard questions for last. uh. i've generally been really happy with the fics i've been posting recently. i think will you meet me there? is my favorite right now, just because it turned out EXACTLY how i wanted it and i got to write so many of my favorite xmen characters and dynamics. ororo <3 ororoscott <3 stormfrost <3

not gonna tag anyone, but if you want to do this yourself, go wild!

[areyouafraid]

ocean ask

i can't find the original poster for the life of me but i found this in my bookmarks somewhere and wanted to do it

pearl: if you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go and why? i'm not sure! i'm in this weird headspace where i kinda want to travel but i don't know where to. i've never actually gone outside of new england at all. it can be really expensive and honestly depending on what you're doing it can be exhausting. like i couldn't imagine going to see like the eiffel tower and waiting in traffic forever and planning everything and then you get there and it's crowded and you're waiting forever... it just sounds not fun. but i do want to see the world i just don't know what that means to me yet

sails: describe your perfect partner. IDK. someone i can relate to

lighthouse: how much makeup do you wear? i never wear makeup. when i do i feel like i just look weird

shells: would you prefer to be a vampire or a werewolf? i was a vampire kid but i think being a vampire probably imposes more restrictions on your lifestyle. do you turn into a werewolf whenever the full moon is out or just whenever you look at it? i think i could handle being a werewolf and still like live normally

mermaid: most embarrassing moment? i will not answer this

turquoise: weirdest dream you’ve ever had? one time i was in an abandoned stable or pig farm and a little horned black goat told me in a high pitched voice that "it's so much fun playing with [me]". one time i read someone's fiction website and got transported to a demonic version of my street. one time i was a member of a cult that spoke entirely in french and latin and took part in a ritual sword-fight-to-the-death with the daughter of the leader. one time i was a child being escorted through a suburb by a man in a cloak and there were dead, mutilated dogs on the roofs and lawns and he was telling me not to look at the dogs. one time i picked up a teddy bear on the side of the road and was teleported to an endless garage inhabited by a demon. one time i worked in a deli with cell from dragon ball. one time i was trying to have sex with a robot but his arms were made of like pop tubes or slinkies and it was super weird

waves: favourite season and why? i used to hate the cold season but after how bad these last few summers have been i've made amends with it. i love winter now

breakers: would you ever consider getting married? i always thought the concept was weird. i mean i would if my partner wanted to but it just seemed like... it's just so much to go through and it doesn't really change what you are to each other. in my head, you don't love a "girlfriend" less than a "wife". they're the same thing. i guess there's like a financial benefit to getting married or something, but it's just. you know weddings are so out there and they're this whole... thing, and then if things ever don't work out or go south between the two of you, divorce is this whole process that can take fucking forever and i feel like the process of getting divorced can take a breakup that would otherwise be fairly amicable and just make them hate each other by the time it's through. i just dont really. get it

seafoam: describe your ideal summer vacation. probably to fucking antarctica or greenland if i'm going to be completely honest. summer is a terrible time to do big things

rain: if it were possible, what exotic animal would you keep as a pet? i wanted a giant african millipede at one point. i also wanted silkmoths and yellow mealworm beetles. if i had to go for something really ostentatious i'd say me and an octopus probably have a lot in common

sunlight: least favourite song? i don't know i don't really listen to music i don't like

marine: would you ever consider plastic surgery? i have considered it before. body troubles can make you consider a lot of things you wouldn't usually. but normally i would say no. still sometimes you have days where you think... i need lipo, i need my boobs cut off, i need leg extensions, i need this i need that etc

sea glass: what do you consider to be your best physical feature? maybe my eyes or my nose. idk

storm: do you like piercings and tattoos? Why or why not? i liek both

boardwalk: who is your favourite fictional couple? i dont kneeeowwwwww. idk... shin and noi, c-3po and r2-d2... honestly those are the first two that came up when i thought "fictional pairings that i like". im not really into shipping

coral: if you had to describe your personality as a food, what would you be and why? i wrote the answer for tidal b4 this one. ummm... probably something like salt or chili for the same reason. they can be good notes when they're subdued, but when they're prominent they can be overwhelming

nymph: old-fashioned or modern decor? i can't decide. they kinda feed into each other

seawater: scariest movie you’ve ever watched? not sure

siren: in a fantasy setting, would you be a warrior, rogue or mage? i obviously can't be a warrior... so either rogue or mage. being a mage would be cool i think

tempest: your favourite Pokemon? ummm... sawk gliscor flygon gyarados mightyena breloom emboar electivire hypno mr mime mewtwo granbull and others

tropic: what is your least favourite thing about your appearance? never ask me this

aquamarine: describe your dream date. i don't know! i don't think about this a lot. what defines a date? what gives it value? i'd say that any time you spend with someone you love has intrinsic value, it doesn't have to be an occasion

brine: gold or silver? hmm... im inclined to say gold but i can't imagine a gold wallet chain so that's a bit of a deal breaker

tidal: what is a colour that best describes your personality? my personality? ummmm i've been told that i have a "mature" or "organized" air, and i do try to remain calm and rational when faced with a challenge, but i know personally that i tend to be very obsessive and i panic when things don't go according to plan. my own desire to live in the moment and not care is undermined by that 1. i tend to fixate on the potential risks and outcomes of something INSTEAD of whether it would make me happy and 2. i do care about what people think of me / how people perceive me / how something will impact the future. maybe green or red. deep or faded tones can give a sophisticated and professional impression, but bright tones can be bold and produce a wild and jarring image

azure: what is something that you do that makes you happy? i liek video games and listening to music

fog: describe where you think you’ll be in five years. hopefully alive and well

coastline: what is your favourite flower? hydrangea perhaps. or the utilitarian dandelion. or lilacs!

shallows: what is your typical Starbucks order? IDK

voyage: what are your favourite names? like for people? or for animals? nicknames or given names? i don't know man

shipwreck: do you have an OC? If so, describe them. i have many. but eek im embarrassed

cerulean: do you believe in true love? idk. define it

shoreline: if you could become fluent in another language, which would you pick and why? i did french in middle and high school and fell out with it. in 2022 i learned some russian but also just stopped making time for it. since i already know the cyrillic alphabet i've considered ukrainian. my grandparents were ukrainian so i feel kinda like i have a ... responsibility? i don't know. i also feel like i should at least try to reach fluency in french because ... i spent that money on the dictionary and i spent the time in the classes and i should at least finish the job

tsunami: describe a dream outfit of yours. ONE THAT LOOKS GOOD ON ME

riptide: are you introverted or extroverted? Are you happy with this? i suppose i would be an "introvert" bc gatherings and stuff tend to make me feel drained after a while. it's certainly... a source of inconvenience, but i don't necessarily think it doesn't work for me because i generally don't maintain large circles

hurricane: describe a strange habit of yours. i make a lot of html files. just like... simple lists and bookmarks and stuff like that. like for example i don't have an account on etsy or anything like that so my "wishlist" is just an html file with links to things from online stores i'm interested in. it makes sense to me but saying it aloud it definitely sounds weird lol. i'm a little worried that i might die and someone will get access to my computer and think "wow. what the fuck was wrong with her"

[tamamita]

As an Asian American citizen, I gotta say that that one guy has a point. It's not that I support the military, I would love to see it die horribly actually. What can't be denied is how the US gets their soldiers and marines. The state of propaganda in the US along with how predatory the military recruiters are, it's very easy to take these young, unknowing, and often poor kids and bing bang boom you have soldiers that are barely 18 with some of the worst education in the developed world. I knew kids growing up in middle and high school that took part in ROTC classes, they didn't know what they were doing, just going because they were told to. What does a kid know of leaving, these kids are told daily their will is not their own. Scholarships from that are worth tens of thousands of dollars, money that I have only dreamed of seeing. All I'm saying here is military recruitment is a relentless and voracious beast, and begins when kids are barely teenagers. Practically brain washing our youth. Did you know any better when you were in school? Yes, because you didn't grow up in the US.

Nobody denies that the US army make use of jingoistic propaganda to recruit people, this doesn’t even pertain to children, even disenfranchised adults are easily persuaded. That is why I don’t empathise with them. You guys are always trying to use propaganda and implicit bias as a scapegoat for their contribution to the death of PoC and neither confronting the thought behind your bigoted actions/inactions, which. is. a. choice. And no, they are not often poor people, c’mon.

Whether you had the agency to make your decisions or not, you make it very clear that by the virtue of them being children (17 year olds), any killing they do absolves them any guilt. This is a piss poor take and I could’t give a flying shit about their social position. The U.S has a proportionally better educational system than most third world countries, and for you to centralize the issue on one particular front, while completely neglecting the issues WE face, you continue to perpetuate the benefit of the doubt for barely 18 y/o kids, who then return to achieve a fuckin medal, a college degree, a nice house, a hun and some children. Blood is on their hands; guilt will forever be a part of them. They do not deserve any empathy nor are they entitled to it. Especially by us. 

What my issue is and will forever be is that a bunch of invaders trod upon our lands with full convinction that they had the right to take lives. They do not have to show up at some tribunal for what they did, they are instead sent home for a hero’s praise. You keep concerning yourself with how they fell prey to the system, but never the blood stained on their hands while you keep neglecting the lives of millions of children who were already living in destitution. I get you, they were brainwashed, they were victims of the U.S war machine’s propaganda, but unfortunately, once you’ve taken an innocent life, you no longer deserve any empathy nor are you entitled to it.

I did know better, because I’m a victim of imperialism. Knowing that my country is in shambles and have no means of recovering says a lot about how much of my roots have been completely destroyed. You wanna vouch for these kids, then I give you guys the task to go on a mission stop their brains from being eaten. Otherwise, if you’re gonna do nothing about it, I don’t need to hear more from you.  

[morimallow]

Dive With Me

⚠ : slight (?) NSFW in the beginning.

pairing: Hoshiumi Korai x reader because he be second to my Morisuke.

HOLY SHIT, I FORGOT. THIS CONTAINS SLIGHT SPOILERS ABOUT THE HAIKYUU MANGA.

“K-Korai..!” you called out his name as you tightened around his dick. “Slow down.. a-ahh..” You grabbed the edge of the headboard to gather some strength because he was pounding into you real good. He was filling you to the brim, hitting the exact same spot over and over again.

He leaned closer to you with his mouth dangerously near your ear. Hearing his soft grunts and heavy breathing just turns you on even more than before. “If you want me to slow down, you have to beg,” he pulls out his thick cock until only the tip is in, he continued, “louder, for my name,” he thrusts in you in one swift harsh move, “and harder, my darling.” You clenched your dripping pussy upon hearing that endearment he only uses in bed.

You moaned and screamed his name as he thrusted in and out of you harder and faster. “Fuck, baby. Are you trying to milk me, huh? You feel so fucking good.” Without a word, you squeezed him inside you as you ride out your orgasm prolonged by your boyfriend's hot groans and marks by sucking your neck. Korai followed you and came inside, his thick cum filling up the condom haha u thought practice safe sex.

After resting for a bit, he stood up in all his crowning glory I mean dude he's seriously hot threw the condom in the trash bin and went back to the bed spooning you.

He placed soft open-mouthed kisses on your shoulder and nape, secretly trying to look at your phone screen.

“Korai, love,” you started and he hummed in response, his all attention on you. “Can we adopt?”

He moved his hand from your waist down and started drawing soothing circles on your stomach. “Why? Is one of us infertile or something? We can just make one. You should've told me to stop using con—” You cut him of by your hysterical laughter.

“Fuck!” You continued laughing, grabbing his hand tightly around your stomach as it starts to hurt. Then finally, you said, “But we can't make a whale, babe. I want a whale.”

Right then, you were now laying on your back and you see in your peripheral vision that your boyfriend is staring at you— blankly. After a while, he said breathlessly, “Are you serious right now? You're unbelievable.”

“But I really want a whale. Midnight is so cute!” you tried to reason out to him. You had your obsession with whales when you were in junior high. These large mammals roam in vast and calm oceans that you just wanna swim with them forever. You were a professional diver even before you started college and graduated from a prestigious school, earning your bachelor's degree in Marine Biology and now you're taking up Cetology for further studies.

Seeing that your boyfriend is still not convinced, you straddled his stomach, completely forgetting that you're butt-naked. Placing one of your gentle hands on his hard and toned chest, you gave him your puppy eyes, “Just look at him!” you exclaimed as you held out your phone to him, picture of Midnight's tail above the water.

And with that, Korai almost gave in to your charms like he always does. He placed his rough and calloused hands on your hips, “Baby, we can't possibly home a huge ass whale here—” and you snapped. You know Korai doesn't share the same love for whales as you do but he should at least know it's illegal to take whales from their natural habitat.

You got up and stood by the bed and said with such disappointment, “Home a whale? That's what's impossible. It's an adoption! It's just a certificate but the staff would take care of him. They'd just send us pictures and videos of our baby and that's it.” You stomped towards the bathroom, with your back facing him, you said, “You should've at least known that I'd never adopt a whale to live in our house but to help them,” entered the room and slammed the door at his gaping face.

Feeling irritated at your actions, Korai decided to share this to his team and get their opinions.

“Even you, Kageyama? Seriously,” he scoffed and went out for his early morning run. You usually go together but you're both irritated so Korai decided to just ignore you.

Walking out of the bathroom, you saw that Korai was no where to be found. Maybe I hurt him..? You tend to not think of someone's feelings when it comes to whales. Guessing that he won't be back until lunch or probably until dinner, you went to your university to continue your lab research. If he'll ignore you then might as well ignore him too.

You couldn't concentrate on your research and your professor suggested you go home early and come back when you feel better. You agreed, thinking that your boyfriend was waiting for you to come home and you'd make your dinner together but when you got home, it was empty. It was cold and just.. dull. He's not here. It's just a house.

Trying to be optimistic, you started to make dinner. Since your boyfriend is an athlete, you made him something which is low in carbs and high in protein. You were always thoughtful and observant — keeping tabs on every little detail about him. Like how he crunches his nose when he blushes, how he kisses your forehead when he has early morning practice, the way he moves making the smallest sounds possible because he doesn't want to wake you up..

An hour passed. Two, three, four..

You lost count and fell asleep in the dining room.

You've had enough. Alright, Y/N, you're going to the university, finish Chapter 4, pass it to professor, continue your experimentation, go for an evening jog and don't think of Korai. Who cares if you're getting busy the day before your birthday? Not like your boyfriend will throw an unexpected party or at least come home, right? You're pathetic. And you did just that.

Sun shining through the window, you slowly opened your eyes. You looked at the clock and it was already 11AM. Maybe he's home. You ran towards the door, with the biggest smile on your face, to see if his shoes are there. And they weren't.

You came home at around 21:32 and you're beat, so, you took a quick shower and went to bed, not bothered by the fact that he didn't come back.

The soft mattress of the bed left your back and was replaced by two strong and muscled arms. It was warm. It was home. It was Korai. You didn't believe that he was here carrying you to who-knows-where. But even so, guilt was eating you up and you said to the dream Korai, “I'm so sorry, love,” and you sniffled a cry. The dream Korai kissed your forehead and then a peck to your lips. “I'm sorry too, my love, but I need you to go back to sleep, okay?” He's not real but you muttered an okay back anyway.

When you dream, you always end up waking up on the floor not unless Korai is holding you in your sleep but you didn't expect that you'd wake up in a different.. soft bed. You slowly sat up because you were kinda dizzy. Maybe you did fall off the bed but the small window inside the room said otherwise. It was still dark out, probably dawn. Your boyfriend's Adlers jacket caught your eyes. It was hung beside the window with a pair track pants and your favorite shirt from Korai's closet. Feeling a little chilly, you wore the given clothes and tucked your hands inside the pocket of the jacket. You felt a paper and took it out. It read: Come to the upper deck, baby. There are signs so you won't get lost. I'll be waiting.

You saw him leaning slightly over the railings. With the strong wind and waves crashing against the ship, he couldn't hear you walking towards him. You placed your arms around his torso, placing your hands against his rock-hard abs to keep it warm. “You weren't a dream after all,” you whispered more to yourself as you tightened your grip around him.

“I'm always real,” he replied as he took one of your hands and putting it up to his lips to kiss it. It was warm. It was real. Clenching your hand to a fist, you pressed your forehead against his back and held back the tears. “You're here. You came back..”

He turned around and held your chin with his thumb and index finger to look into your eyes. His features softened even more as he saw your tears. He cupped your cheek and held you by your waist, pulling you closer to him and pressed his lips against yours. You missed this. You missed him. The kiss was slow and passionate. You pulled for a brief moment to tilt your heads and came back to each other's lips. Eyes closed, bodies in one big bubble, and hearts connected. He pulled away and you chased his lips and slowly opened your eyes. He has this mischievous glint in his eyes. You know he saw you wanting for more and you blushed looking down.

“Fuck this,” you muttered. You wrapped your arms around his neck, standing on your tip-toes, and kissed him again. This time, longer.

He snaked his arms around your waist and backed you up against the railing. He bit and nibbled on your plump lower lip as he pulled away, out of breath. He placed an open-mouthed kiss on your exposed neck and you moaned at the warmth.

“Let's go back to our room, yeah? It's quite cold,” he stated as he ran his hands through your hair.

“Carry me? You're warm,” you showed him your puppy eyes and super pouty lips, result of your intense kiss.

He shook his head and smiled at your cuteness. He spread his arms and said, “Jump,” and you did. He immediately supported your body as your wrapped your arms and legs around him, burying your head in the crook of his neck and dozed off.

You woke up again in a moving vehicle but this time, you were blindfolded.

“Korai! Are you fucking serious?!” you shouted because you have no idea where your boyfriend is seated or whether he is in the vehicle.

Series of laughters and uh-oh's erupted as someone chuckled beside you and kissed your cheek. “Don't worry, love. We're close. I just hope you're ready for this.” You scoffed, said fine, and squeezed his hand.

After a while, the vehicle stopped. The door was opened and Korai tugged your hand. As soon as you were outside, you asked, “The ocean..?”

Korai guided you to an office. You heard him say, “Mr. Hoshiumi. Yes.. yes. Thank you.”

“Ko-chaaaaaan, tell me what's happening. Take of—” And he really did take off your blindfold. He handed you a paper bag and instructed, “Go change into that. The changing room is up ahead to the right. I'll wait for you here.”

In less than 3 minutes, you came back to the spot and screamed, “I'M GOING DIVING?!” with so much excitement that the staff started to laugh quietly. You eyed your boyfriend. The wetsuit hugging his toned body and it occurred to you.. “YOU'RE DIVING WITH ME?”

Double-checking whether your gears are properly secured, your eyes caught a whale, leaping out of the water. You're frozen in the spot. “Korai..”

“Hmm?” he replied, busy with the equipment.

“I saw Midnight,” you said to him. Then, you turned to the staff who was with you and asked, “The whale who just leapt. That was Midnight, right? Tell me I'm right.”

As she was about to answer, the sound of a whale diving back into the water entered your ears. You whipped your head and just saw the tail. Your eyes widened. “Holy fucking shit, Korai! It really is Midnight!” you whisper-shouted to him.

His eyebrows furrowed and confusion was clear on his handsome features, “How do you know? You just saw it's tail.”

“Exactly!”

“What? Don't whales all look the same?”

You can't help but roll your eyes at his question. “Of course not. Whales are identified and and named by their tails. His name is Midnight because his whole tail is a dark shade of blue.”

“Oh, good. Now I can identify my son as well,” he said to you smiling. You melted at the sight but then you realized..

“Son?! You adopted Midnight?!” you whisper-shouted at him again.

“Yes, and why are you whisper-shouting? You can just voice out your excitement, you know?”

You glared at him, “Excuse me, Hoshiumi Korai. You must know that whales could be gravely affected by noise pollution.”

After diving into the water with Korai and the staff, who is holding a camera, maybe for documentation of something, you quickly searched for Midnight.

With your keen eye, you spotted him and quickly swam towards him, Korai and the staff followed behind, so you could bond with him.

While swimming with the adopted whale with so much joy, Korai grabbed your hand and made you face him.

You gave him a questioning look and it was answered the time he pulled out a small box and opened it. You were shocked.

You pulled the him upwards, heads now above the water. You quickly took off his mouthpiece and goggles. As you locked eyes with him, he knew the answer.

He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you close, he held the box tightly in his hand and you wrapped yours around his neck.

Your lips met. The saltwater or probably tears joining in your mouth. He pulled away, pressed his forehead against yours and held your left hand. As he slipped the ring and kissed you once again, Midnight leapt just behind you. And the staff captured this perfect moments.

After getting the certificate of adoption and the whale brochure, you were now in the upper deck with Korai by your side, enjoying the full-blown formal engagement party planned by your fiance's rivals and now friends back in his highschool days.

With a drink in his hand, a light brown-haired man approached you. You recognized him as one of Korai's teammates in the Japanese National Team.

“Congrats, man. I was gonna let you pay double for the rent if Y/N-san here didn't accept your marriage proposal,” Yaku-san said and laughed lightly. He acknowledged you by bringing his cup of wine lightly towards you and you did the same.

“Thanks and as if I'd pay double. Go away. Shoo!”

“Oh, you're dissing the owner of the ship now? How bold, Hoshiumi-san,” then Yaku started to walk away. When he was near the door, he shouted, “Pay triple, you fucktard!”

As Korai was babbling incoherent words, probably insults, you grabbed him by the arm and pulled him towards the side of the deck where no one can see you. Looking down and pinching his blazer, “Give it me.”

“Give to you what?”

“Your coat! Let me wear it.. ”

He hugged you tight and placed his chin on top of your head, “Why, my fiancee? Want to show your possessio—”

“My nipples are hard, goddamn it, Korai!” you said it directly at his chest. He pulled away looked at your body. You looked extra ravishing tonight as you wore a red silk dress—low cut to show enough cleavage, a slit up just below your hip, spaghetti straps and your lower back fully exposed.

“You're so perfect I want to pound into you until you can't attend university for your degree but I'll deal with you later,” he said as he took of his coat and draped it over your shoulders.

“Let's go greet some more guests,” he said and started to walk towards the crowd.

Feeling a little bolder, you grabbed his tie and pulled him towards you, nose touching.

Maintaining eye contact, you licked his upper lip and said seductively, “Can later be now, darling?”

He groaned into the crook of your neck and replied, “I'm gonna give you the best birthday present yet.”

M. List

[rieson]

@sanjis-simp submitted; Hi! Can I get a matchup for One Piece if you’re still open for them? Please and thank you! I’m 5’5 and am a plus size girl. Super pale with dyed black hair with straight bangs and hair to my shoulders. Personality wise I’m an infp or 6w5. I I’ve been told I’m kind but I’m also very opinionated especially about civil rights, politics, and how people are treated so I can come off bitchy to some people. I do curse a lot and will absolutely obsess over something until I learn all I can or until I get bored of it. I’m a big homebody never really go to parties or anything like that. I’d rather stay home and watch tv or read. Thanks again!

hello ! thank you so much for requesting love, i match you up with . . .

word count; 1,440

Donquixote Rosinante / Corazon !

Now, let me start with the usual height difference between you both; I'm sorry but you look like a dwarf standing next to your 293 cm boyfriend.

Like, an absolute DWARF. (Why is he so tall god dammit)

It's embarrassing but, he first met you when he stumbled down the stairs trying to deliver paperwork to Sengoku's office ─ you were coincidentally trying to go up the stairs so Rosinante ended up kissing your shoes.

If one were to ask 10 year old Rosinante where he would see himself 10 years in the future, the answer was probably going to be something he always wanted to do; "helping people" and NOT tripping down the stairs ─ face planting and possibly kissing someone's shoes right now.

"A-Am i dead..? Am i in heaven?" He mumbled groggily, looking up to see a blurry pale figure with dark hair, "Are you an angel...? P-Pretty ...Pretty angel" The words seemed to slip out of his mouth unconsciously, but it still made you blush.

You cleared your throat, blush still visibly apparent in your cheeks, and you handed out a hand for the stranger to take, "Are you okay? Here get up"

The stranger seemed to snap out of whatever daze they were in, finally processing what just happened.

His lips pursing, he stared at your hand ─ and stared at you ─ and back at your hand ─ and then back at you; you stare at him back.

His face visibly flushed, he opened and closed his mouth repeatedly; before deciding to close it and avert his gaze to the floor that seems oh so interesting now.

"I..Uh....Are you gonna get up? You looked like you were in a hurry" You spoke out; voice so gentle yet it was clear that you held alot of confidence.

The stranger finally deciding that the floor wasn't interesting after all, looked up at you with soft hazel brown eyes, and accepted your hand.

You pulled him up; startling him as if he didn't expect to get pulled up, and he stumbled yet again ─ but this time, he was stumbling forward.

Towards you.

You immediately wrapped your arms around his torso, stopping him from falling down again and possibly bringing you down with him.

To others, it looked like sexual harassment but honestly, the stranger just seems to be really clumsy.

Your whole body was dwarfed by his unusually tall, freaky height, making it a challenge to keep him stable but you did it anyways.

"Whoa! You okay?" A chuckle escapes your lips, "You're really clumsy"

The man flushes at your comment and nods hastily, and stands up as you unwrap your arms in his torso.

You got a good look at the man, he was tall. Like TALL tall, perhaps even more than 250 cm? You couldn't tell.

The man wore a white, short-sleeved shirt emblazoned with the Marine emblem; a simplified gull with the word "MARINE" underneath it, on the back; a blue neckerchief; dark blue trousers and above his shoulders wore a coat, "Justice" on the back. He wore the coat like it tends to be worn like a cape, draped over the shoulders with the arms not in the sleeves; indicating that he was indeed, an ensign.

His unruly blond hair seemed to go towards every direction, making it (if not) tangled.

The man finally spoke out, "Y-Yeah sorry about that.." his voice was a bit deep and husky.

"It's fine, you looked like you were in a rush" You answered kindly, crouching to gather his scattered papers he dropped.

He seemed to notice this and started to panick; arms flailing around.

"W-Wait! It's okay I can pick it up!" He sheepishly spoke out, finally taking a look at you and panicking more as he saw that you were a Rear-Admiral.

"No, No it's fine." As he was about to stop you, you were already done gathering the scattered papers, handing it to him with a smile.

"You're in a rush, aren't you? I understand, i also tend to get a bit clumsy and panicky when i wasnt in time." You chuckled.

"Y-Yeah! Thank you ...once again" He took the papers from you, and bowed.

"It's no problem! Please don't bow to me it's a bit awkward haha.." You nervously trail off.

"I- IM very sorry! I didn't mean to- I mean- I-"

"It's fine, it's fine ! You're going to Sengoku's office right ? Better be fast then" You gave him a wink.

The man blushes, "R-Right! My name's Rosinante ma'am" He gives you a shy smile.

You gave a smile back, "Chanae."

And that's practically how you two met; cliche yikes but it's fine !!!1!#!

You both kept accidentally crossing each-others paths and decided to atleast be friends because it was starting to get awkward with the short "hi's" and "how are you's"

As you got closer to Rosi, you found out that he was indeed, an extremely clumsy dork.

Its pretty comical actually, despite you hating the amount of bruises he gets from his clumsiness.

Rosinante grew up and up the ranks; finally reaching the marine commander rank.

While you, only going up to Vice-admiral, just like garp.

You've been offered the title 'Admiral' quite often but you declined, not wanting such a heavy title to be put on your shoulder.

Rosinante was disappointed to say the least but he was supportive with your decision.

Over the past few years of doing missions with you, Rosinante gained a not so small crush on you.

Scratch that, he mf loved you.

He wanted to confess how he felt to you; even if you dont return the feeling back ─ he can relax knowing he's confessed already.

Hence, that's why he's outside of your office, bouquet in hand, as he thinks of a thousand scenarios that would happen when he knocked the door to your office.

Taking a deep breath, Rosi finally gathers enough courage to knock on your door.

And so he did.

Knock.

Knock.

A door creaking could be heard, your head peeked out of the door, face visibly displaying confusion.

"Uh- Hello Chan!"

"Rosi..? What are you doing?" You narrowed your eyes at the suspiciously acting 9 foot tall man.

"Uh..I....I wanted to tell you that I like you!- I-Uh- M-More as a friend..And i was hoping if I could take you out on a d-date...?" He trails off softly, his gaze glued on the floor, face flushed.

Your eyebrows raised in surprise, flushing lightly before shrugging, your mouth forming a smile unsconiously "Sure!"

You both took the relationship slowly; not wanting to rush and make one another uncomfortable.

You and Rosi has alot of things in common; including civil rights.

Rosinante was raised to not be like other celestial dragons; he was truly kind.

And you wanted to make sure people were treated how you think is right.

You both hate celestial dragons; you more than Rosi.

Often, when someone gets offended by you cursing your mouth off, Rosi will usually be the one who will apologize profusely while you continue throwing profanities at the celestials.

Rosi also admired your hunger in knowledge; he knows a bit but he isn't as extreme as you.

Rosi HAS to drags you to sleep sometimes otherwise, you'll loose your sleep because you were focusing on learning too much.

Rosi doesn't like to go on alot of parties either, he instead just likes to be alone with you; either cuddling you or watching you read with a lovestruck gaze.

He absolutely loves the fact that you're plus size! He doesn't care what other people thinks, it makes you supper huggable and Rosi loves it.

Likes to shower you with kisses everywhere. Literally, everywhere !!

He can and will send death glares at disrespectful men that keeps checking you out; you don't need to worry about creepy men from now on. (Rosi drinks his respect women juice !! )

Both marines, you don't have much freetime so Rosi usually buys a dozen of books to give you whenever he sees one that he thinks you'll like; it's his way to remind you that he loves you and also because he loves the way your eyes shine everytime you learn something new.

If you're both not busy though, he'll take you out on nice picnic dates !!

You tried doing a pottery date but that ended up horribly as he kept accidentally smashing his creations and kept slipping on the clay.

Rosinante absolutely adores you and your flaws; he forever will and no one could ever replace you ─ same goes to you for him.

[ Runups : Sabo )If Rosinante doesn't pair well with you.) ]

i...i think i went too far ?? i'm sorry i just love this dork alot.

sorry if Rosinante isn't the most compatible with you, although this is only my take on who would balance well with you.

note; not proofread ! sorry for any grammatical errors.

[iammarylastar]

9. FAREWELL

"So, you're leaving without saying goodbye?"

She said, her voice like a ghost.

Shit.

Cal leaned his hand on the door frame, his forehead followed and he closed his eyes. He could feel Jess trembling behind his back, he could foresee her face soaked in tears, her sobs stuck in her chest.

Shit.

Leaving her was the hardest thing he had ever done, he doubted he could gather the strength to walk out the door, but now she was awake, crying, he knew it would be impossible.

Yet, he had to.

"Chris?" She begged.

He had planned everything, every little detail, like he already had, to break Oyster out.

He got all his stuff ready: a car fueled up, the maps with all the secondary roads highlighted, 4 different options to cross the Canadian border. His backpack, enough military rations to survive for 2 weeks, in case he'd have to ditch the car and cover the distance by foot. A compass. An extra pair of trekking shoes, just in case. Water. Lighter. Headlamp. Emergency kit. US dollars. Canadian dollars.

No phone. 

No pics, not even one of Jessica. He wouldn't risk to get caught and have her involved. Beside it would be too painful to look at her beautiful face. Dealing with her memory would be hard enough.

But he had no choice. More than 3 years he hadn't see his brother. 3 fucking long years he hadn't heard his voice. Teddy, his little brother, the reason he had kept living after their mom died, the one he had fought for. And kept fighting for.

He'd all planned in his head, playing every scenario again and again at night, all those sleepless nights, Jess cuddled against his chest. Looking blankly at the ceiling, on the hunt for what could happen, what could turn wrong, and come what may: keep walking.

Until he reaches Lac-Sainte-Marie, Quebec, 260 miles from here. Until he meets his brother again.

"Chris!" She yelped, like she was drowning.

For a millisecond, he thought he could just give up: forget his little ass of a brother, forget his oath to his mother, forget his responsibilities, drop on his knees and beg Jess to marry him, give her 3 kids, get a pet and live happily ever after. Why not? He deserved a little of happiness, didn't he?

"What is happening?" she whispered, her voice torn by sobs, like stabs in his back.

What the fuck was happening, good question. He was happening. That fucking deceiving Cal was freaking out and ruining everything again. Like it was meant to be.

Like he was meant to screw up every chance of happiness.

"I have to see him. Jess, he got back in touch with me. Those postcards. There must be a reason." He said under his breath, not daring to glance at her.

"Chris, you're still in probation! A single step out of the State and you're in parole violation! You're going to get caught and thrown into jail again!" She knew this argument wouldn't work with him, but she was a lawyer, well almost, she had to plead for her case.

"I know..." Chris whispered. The next words would be excruciating to pronounce.

"That's why I won't come back..."

"Noooo!" She totally broke down.

As he listened to her heart shattering into pieces, taking his own heart down, he couldn't help thinking about time.

It took her days to tame his fears, weeks to heal him for his trauma, months to forge deep, trustful ties between their hearts.

Ties they both thought were unbreakable.

And as it took a heartbeat to fall in love with her, he'd been quick to break her heart.

Now he was running out of time. With her. For Oyster. Fuck.

"At least wait for your probation period to be over! You'll be a free man and you could go wherever you want!" She begged.

Like he didn't know. Like he hadn't spent the last days counting how many days it would take to be reunited. Like he hadn't thought of it from top to bottom. Like he hadn't been obsessed and torn about that fucking choice he had to make.

"Three more years! Jess, I can't leave him alone for 3 more fucking years! He needs me!" He let his anger flow out of his chest.

"What about me????" She thundered, gripping her nightie where her heart ached, then pointing a furious index finger out.

"He's not a kid anymore! He made his choice! You don't owe him anything anymore! When are you going to start thinking about yourself? About us?"

Touché.

Cal wavered at her words. The more she spoke, the more his determination weakened. He had no choice but cling to his same old song.

"I'm his legal guardian, I promised mom I'd take care of him. I can't break my oath. Not again..."

It would have been easier if Chris was the selfish type. But he didn't choose Marine corps and law enforcement by mistake. He was a man of principle, loyal, honest, trustful. A man with Semper Fidelis inked in his flesh forever.

"Chris!!" Jess was burning with rage and desperation. She was fed up with his sempiternal lame excuses.

She would have slapped his face full force if she could have moved, again and again until he got it, but violence never fixed anything, she was dead certain of this.

Chris’ childhood to adulthood, his former job in the Marine corps, his time in jail, his whole damn life had been nothing but violence, he deserved better from her.

She breathed in and out slowly to calm her nerves down and regain control of her thoughts.

Give him what he needs, that's the only way...

"You're strong Chris. You're a good man! Why can't you see it?"

Cal shook his head, tears threatening again behind his lids.

"I failed. I failed to keep my mom alive. I failed to protect my brother. To serve my country... To make you happy. I don't deserve you..."

"When are you going to stop punishing yourself for things, you're not responsible for? Jesus, your mom died, who's to blame? Not you! You struggled to provide for your brother though you were barely an adult, Chris, you did your best! Oyster made some bad choices, his choices, he fucked up but it was not your fault!"

Gone his sweetheart of a girlfriend, he was facing a new, fierce, unstoppable soldier ready for anything for her love.

Anything. Maybe, even ready to throw everything away for him.

Cal slowly extended his hand to a trembling Jess. This gesture was a dangerous step back, he had promised himself not to touch her, not to smell her nor to get too close. No way he could leave this place without her if their hands were linked.

Jess nearly jumped forward to take it, intertwined her fingers so tightly with his, their knuckles turned white. She closed her other hand over their clasped ones, then pulled them against her cheek, nuzzling against the slightest piece of his skin she could.

The contact of her skin against his made him jolt. His plea slipped through his lips before his brain realized their impact.

"Come with me. I hate to put that on you but... Jess, come with me. I don't want to lose you..."

His words were like slaps in her face. Her jaw dropped down and the look she threw at him slapped him back.

Shit.

She thought she had won. She thought he had heard her words. She thought he would stay. Why would he have offered his hand otherwise?

"Wh..? But... Cal, what are you doing?"

"Come with me Jessica. Let's start a new life in Canada. I love you. I love you!"

His turn to wrap his hand around hers and pull her closer, so his gaze pierced hers, his taut body hovering over her. This could fix everything.

Say yes! Say yes! Say yes!!

Jessica froze in shock, her pupils widened. She would have left all she had behind to follow him. The solution was easy: just go with him!

Just go with him, and become an outlaw. Say goodbye to your family, your career, your dreams, your life. On the run forever with the man she loved. With no future but hiding and lying.

"And you saved your first 'I love you' for the day you leave me..." Jess whispered under her breath, defeated. He killed her hope the second before, and kept doing an excellent job to trample on her heart.

Her whole body slumped down; Cal had to tighten his grip on her hands to get her upright.

Her pale complexion and her trembling voice made her look like a ghost.

"No. I can't. You can't... do that. You can't drag me into a runaway and make me a fugitive. I... I'm... My family is here, my career is here, my life is here... with you!

If you really love me, STAY!"

Chris wobbled, his knees weak under him. She was right, he knew it. He was wrong, doing all wrong, as he always had done. Jessica saw her chance in his hesitation, and played her last card. Faithfulness, Chris' obsession.

"That's not what you promised me. Chris, you promised me..." she burst into tears again, clinging onto him like he was a lifeline. Their love was like the Titanic, they thought it beautiful and in submersible, but it was irremediably sinking in the middle of nowhere and will end up broken shipwreck.

Hold on Rose, you have a chance.

Sorry Jack, you're screwed.

Shit.

He promised her, that day he talked his heart out, in the wee hours of a beautiful day, lying in bed, slowly brushing her delicate face with his fingertips. That day he told her about his plans for the future, their future. Openly daydreaming of his will to marry her, build her a house, have kids with her, three he said, if she agreed. Plus, a dog. One day, he promised, when she would graduate and he would have a better job.

He solemnly promised her to make her happy, happy ever after.

"You deserve to be happy, Chris. We've been so happy together. For fuck sake, why couldn't we just be happy?"

Because happiness is not meant for me.

"Jess, I miss him so much... I have no choice."

"There's always a choice... Let me help!" She begged a last time, squeezing his hands even tightly.

Chris closed his eyes, his sigh shaky through his tight throat. Just do it. Say it.

Now.

"No. Not this time... Let me go, Jess, please..." Chris grudgingly untied their fingers but Jess kept gripping at him, his wrists, his arms, his hoodie. He patiently unhooked each of her attempt, gently but firmly holding her wrists together.

It was so hard, Jesus, to see her face, desperate and drowned in tears, to hear a plea, to hurt her so deeply. But it had to be done. Like ripping off a band-aid. Just do it.

"No, no, no, no, Chris, please, nooo!" She begged, she would have given anything, everything to have him think, find another way, change his fucking mind. To have him stay. Choose her.

All her expectations vanished when Cal took her hands in his large palms, bent to kiss them but just leant his forehead on them, shaken by both their sobs and cries. He knew he couldn't leave if his lips touched her skin again. She knew it too.

Slowly, too slowly, he extended his arms until her fists laid on her chest, her fingers writhing in pain, and stepped back. Unable to look a last time in her eyes, Cal turned his heels and grabbed the doorknob.

"What if I'm pregnant?"

He froze, like punched in his guts.

"What?" His world collapsed. He had all the scenarios figured out, even the worst, but not this one.

He had made love to her earlier that night, knowing it'd be the last time. He made it last long, savoring each second with her, kissing each piece of her body, learning each of her curves by heart with his fingertips. He made it sensual, passionate, beautiful. He had given her all, all of him.

He had laid on his back for hours, his love cuddled on his side, her arms around his chest, like to keep him from running away. Like she felt it.

He had stayed like this forever, staring at the ceiling, listening to her deep breathing, feeling her, smelling her, until he was drunk from her.

"I said, what if I'm pregnant." She stated again, interrupting his thoughts.

"Are you?" He blankly asked.

She might be. From tonight.

She could be. They've been careless for a couple of weeks, their desire so strong they skipped to put a condom on. They both silently agreed, since they had a talk about it: they wanted to spend their lives together and grow a family, one day or another...

Jess had tried the pill, but it hadn't fit her. She tried 3 different brands but every time something went wrong. Cal hated seeing her with cramps or moody and IUD was a big no no due to her young age, so he decided to take the responsibility of the birth control, and simply pulled out at the right time.

Which was, according to Jess, like a firework without the final. Several times, half of the time in fact, she trapped Cal between her legs so he came inside of her. She found it so sexy and powerful.

Sexy but likely give rise to a baby.

Their baby. His.

"You won't stay for me. Would you stay for your child?"

Bitch. She knew how push his button, where it hurt the most. Given what he was doing to her, it was fair.

His guts twisted painfully and nausea invaded his throat at the thought. His deepest nightmare resurfaced: a kid with no father to take care of them, ruffle their hair, tickle them until they're breathless from laughing, play football with them, hug them tight when they're scared or sad. A kid with no dad to love them. A kid like he'd been, grown up before his childhood even had started.

A missing father. That was what he would become if he left now. The worst of the worst. A man he promised himself to never be. Fucking never hurt someone like he'd been hurt.

He unsuccessfully was trying to clear his mind from sadness and anger to redo his math and remember when was her last period. Calculate the odds of a pregnancy. Rate his chance to stay.

Zero.

He sucked. He wasn’t worth anything.

Maybe living was the best he could do to save this child from himself. He was no better father than his own, unable to make a good decision.

Chris dropped his head, his hands tightened in fists, his eyes closed in a frown. He stopped breathing for a long time, until he made his decision.

"I'm sorry." He muttered, grabbing the doorknob.

That was it. She couldn't go, he couldn't stay. I guess that's just the way the story goes.

Such a waste.

Chris pushed the door open, wiped his tears with his sleeve and walked out, without a last glance at her.