#or you're on the outside looking in
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The urge to interact online while simultaneously not wanting to interact out of fear of being annoying or because you feel like you don't belong. 😂😭
#navybrat rambles#this is my brain#i can't explain it some days#this isn't a constant feeling#just sometimes#but i see some people interact and it's both lovely to witness and isolating#because sometimes you try and you get shut down#or you're on the outside looking in#but you keep trying#some days it's all you can do#personal#ramblings#are you reading my tags?#go drink some water#stay hydrated my friends#but also#why did i post this
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I found an extremely dope disability survival guide for those who are homebound, bedbound, in need of disability accommodations, or would otherwise like resources for how to manage your life as a disabled person. (Link is safe)
It has some great articles and resources and while written by people with ME/CFS, it keeps all disabilities in mind. A lot of it is specific to the USA but even if you're from somewhere else, there are many guides that can still help you. Some really good ones are:
How to live a great disabled life- A guide full of resources to make your life easier and probably the best place to start (including links to some of the below resources). Everything from applying for good quality affordable housing to getting free transportation, affordable medication, how to get enough food stamps, how to get a free phone that doesn't suck, how to find housemates and caregivers, how to be homebound, support groups and Facebook pages (including for specific illnesses), how to help with social change from home, and so many more.
Turning a "no" into a "yes"- A guide on what to say when denied for disability aid/accommodations of many types, particularly over the phone. "Never take no for an answer over the phone. If you have not been turned down in writing, you have not been turned down. Period."
How to be poor in America- A very expansive and helpful guide including things from a directory to find your nearest food bank to resources for getting free home modifications, how to get cheap or free eye and dental care, extremely cheap internet, and financial assistance with vet bills
How to be homebound- This is pretty helpful even if you're not homebound. It includes guides on how to save spoons, getting free and low cost transportation, disability resources in your area, home meals, how to have fun/keep busy while in bed, and a severe bedbound activity master list which includes a link to an audio version of the list on Soundcloud
Master List of Disability Accommodation Letters For Housing- Guides on how to request accommodations and housing as well as your rights, laws, and prewritten sample letters to help you get whatever you need. Includes information on how to request additional bedrooms, stop evictions, request meetings via phone, mail, and email if you can't in person, what you can do if a request is denied, and many other helpful guides
Special Laws to Help Domestic Violence Survivors (Vouchers & Low Income Housing)- Protections, laws, and housing rights for survivors of DV (any gender), and how to get support and protection under the VAWA laws to help you and/or loved ones receive housing and assistance
Dealing With Debt & Disability- Information to assist with debt including student loans, medical debt, how to deal with debt collectors as well as an article with a step by step guide that helped the author cut her overwhelming medical bills by 80%!
There are so many more articles, guides, and tools here that have helped a lot of people. And there are a lot of rights, resources, and protections that people don't know they have and guides that can help you manage your life as a disabled person regardless of income, energy levels, and other factors.
Please boost!
#signal boost#please reblog#I'm so so glad this has gotten the traction that it has!#chronic pain#chronic illness#disability#fibromyalgia#cfs#chronic fаtiguе ѕуndrоmе#actually disabled#spoonie#me/cfs#cfs/me#long covid#important#invisible disability#ehlers danlos syndrome#lyme disease#chronically ill#cpunk#cripplepunk#it's a bummer that it's so US centric but if you're outside of the US you can look into similar programs#I hope that other countries have options like these#the US seems so behind when it comes to medical care and disability resources. and i mean it is#but it's good to know all of your rights as a disabled person or if you ever become disabled
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before october 7th this blog was a meme page btw.
#don't you think it's so odd how so many palestinians on tumblr were just minding their own business and having fun#and all of a sudden the genocide started and we started dedicating all our time#to helping and start educating people#only for people to start questioning us and harassing us in the most parasocial ways#and now about half of us are deciding not to share about our personal lives or our interests anymore#because we can't be granted the opportunity to actually have personalities outside of our suffering.#a look into our personal lives is a privilege and all of you abused it#all of this is due to the fact that none of you consider us as actual human beings#even if you're “allies” to the palestinian cause. you still dehumanize us to hell and back#i wish you all could see me as someone who is just like you.
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i wrote an interactive poem for my girlfriend in 3 parts. she said you need to read it.
go here: take only the final quiz or take all 3. i don't mind. it's sad, though. this is a poem about choice. about fate and mental illness and how love fits inside of all of it. this is a poem about a long dark hallway. mostly this is a poem about mango sushi rolls.
good luck. i love you. despite it all, i'm hopeful.
#uqiz#she said i need to put it up here lmafo#something something feel free to send me 5 dollars towards my next sushi roll run#poetry#experimental poetry#there's no specific like warning on this except that im not doing well n therefore it LEAKS into my writing lol#the realllll shit as an author is like ohhhh fuck i write so much better when im mentally unwell lol#:( why cant i be sane AND rational. why does my creativity gotta stem from suffering.#(bc when im not suffering im outside saying YIPPEE and kicking my heels lol)#IF YOU SAW THIS BEFORE I CLICKED THE RIGHT LINK NO YOU DIDNT#hey btw if you're experiencing an error idk what's up with that bc it still loads on my end.#i'll look into solutions but sorry :(#hi friends: i have no idea why sometimes the links break for random people.#it might be a chrome/firefox/etc thing but i will say that the links still work on my end AND i still have people taking each quiz.#so i know it works .... i have no idea what the exact solution is - maybe reload it if urs isn't working?#sorry im not good at coding :(
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the more I play the more I think lucanis basically knows it's illario who betrayed him right from the beginning (he's had a year in the ossuary to think. not that many people knew where he was going. when you ask him 'did Illario know you'd be on that ship' his only answer is the hardest flattest 'yes' you ever heard). so it's not so much about figuring out who the traitor is (because that's ludicrous. we all know. immediately. they didn't really bother to hide it lmao) as about methodically closing off every single avenue of denial lucanis has clung to that whole time with as much or little gentleness as you might prefer until he has no choice but to admit it. because the moment he has to admit it, he'll have to do something -- feel something -- about it. and that's such a catastrophic event in lucanis' inner landscape (he has had TWO people in this whole entire world up until now and will do anything to hold on to them with a heartbreaking child-like desperation, even at and especially through the detriment of his own self) that he'd rather just. not. what if we quite simply. didn't. what if we just stayed here in the emptiness where we can both pretend you didn't hurt me in a way I should never forgive. I have so much practice in that with caterina already it's always worked out great for everyone so far. (press x to fucking doubt but that's trauma logic for you lol)
after everything illario did, so much of the storm of lucanis' emotions around it is 'what the FUCK did you get yourself tangled up in this time and how do I get you out of this mess safely'. what's worse: the fact that your brother murdered you, or that he put himself in horrible danger doing so and thus exposed you to the risk of losing him forever. lucanis' heart certainly has an opinion here and it's fucking unhinged (affectionate)
the themes of dissociation in lucanis' character in general makes me feel nuts. allllll these contradictory messy things he needs to cut off from each other because they can't coexist or be easily reconciled inside him. but all remain stubbornly true separately anyway and will have their due one day. love and resentment. tenderness and fear and rage. terror and longing. love and freedom don't coexist. the burned out golden child anthem is playing in the background. he was always caterina's favourite and he has to keep striving to deserve that dubious honour with every breath he takes and then, presumably, mercifully, some day he will die and be excused and can rest. and until now he's suppressed all the -- natural, healthy, protective! -- negative feelings that threaten the few attachment relationships he actually has, at the cost of ever actually having his needs for connection and safety met and leaving his core self imprisoned and compromised. and spite goes 'what. no. that's dumb fuck that' (*spite voice* I do not understand that and even if I did I would not respect it) and does not allow him to fall back into that, which I think is what saves his life, ultimately. it took being possessed by a demon for lucanis to even contemplate telling anyone he loves 'no' in any way, but hey. whatever gets you there right lol
lucanis is dealing with the freeze response allll the way down baby. and he was even before the ossuary, that just turbo powered it and brought it to a breaking point way before it could happen naturally. but something was going to break eventually no matter what, and I'm just glad that in the end, through the power of friendship and also pure spite, it doesn't have to be him
#I am worried about him all the time. but also: his found family of godslaying maniacs and also the power of love. there are reasons to hope#when there was only one set of footprints in the sand that was the veilguard party holding lucanis in their arms#and going 'excuse you he said no FUCKING pickles!!!' while he's like '🥺should you guys really be -- ' 'YES'#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age meta#there's some messiness to his arc but what mary kirby managed to capture here about how this works. is everything to me#he is so exactly for me. I'm sorry for all the people he turned out not to be for. but not for him being for me#the gift of looking at him and hearing 'you're more than what you're going through' and be forced to annoyedly go 'okay#MAYBE that could be also be true for me. maybe.' he's going through it. and also so much more and the funniest person in the world#he's so worth it to still have in the world!!!!#I'm so glad we don't get to 'fix' his relationship with his family and especially caterina actually#that is stuff that would need to happen on a time scale waaay outside of the one in this game#and there's Something very real in having to go 'this is not for me to decide for you. who you love and what you do about it is yours'
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All this aroace character shipcourse has proven to me that a majority of people that interact in fandom cannot actually interact with characters and media outside of shipping and genuinely I believe you need to learn how to interact with media outside of shipping.
#text#fandom#aro#ace#aroace#aromantic#asexual#this became extremely obvious with Encanto - where the main message of the movie was ignored#and people were so desperate for shipping they started shipping background characters or even the family members....eugh#like at some point you must understand your inability to interact with media outside of a narrow romantic scope is an actual problem#at some point you need to accept you don't ACTUALLY like the media you're interacting with#like genuinely can you say anything else that you like about a piece of media besides the fact you want two characters to kiss?#genuinely i do believe the way some of you interact with things needs to change because it's made fandom spaces literally unbearable#also it has severely limited some of your guy's critical thinking skills#if you want content based around shipping then look at the romance genre it's literally right there for this very reason#shipping just needs to stop dominating fandom discussions and interactions. shipping should not be the main focus of every genre ever ffs#that or y'all need to literally start tagging your shit so that people can actually block it out and find the posts that they want to see
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will peter be like an older brother to miles in lof ?
absolutely he is
there's about an 11 year difference between them (Miles is 14, Peter is 25), so it's a lot more like the older brother type of relationship that Peter has with Tim (despite Tim being his uncle). Peter has mentored(ish) other young heroes by this point (mostly in the Bats' universe) but since Miles is another Spider-Man, Peter takes up most of the responsibility in making sure Miles is safe and teaching him the ropes. That's HIS sassy child genius, thank you, and he's not a sidekick, he's Spider-Man.
He was also adamant that Miles tell his parents immediately, and gets along great with Rio and Jeff.
Which is HILARIOUS to me because at this point in time, Peter has built up a persona for the public eye just like the Bats did. In Rio and Jeff's eyes, they're gobsmacked that the clumsy, scatterbrained, and "scaredy-cat" kid that Tony Stark adopted a while ago is Spider-Man. (Technically, none of this is a lie. Because Peter is a terrible liar unless it's For the Jokes, and often comes across this way even if he hadn't meant to.) They're wondering how he pulled that off since he's the same age as Spider-Man, who is known to be an Avenger, and associates in the same circles as Peter. It helps that Peter and Spider-Man have been in a social media war, and that Peter works at the Daily Bugle that is known for disliking Spider-Man. Peter's been taking lessons for years atp to keep his identity safe. Which is also bonus points to Peter, because the two can tell that secret identities mean everything to him, but he told them who he was in a heartbeat (literally the very first thing he did when he found Miles).
In other words: Peter was ecstatic to become a teacher for his own matching superhero kid and it's one of the most important bonds in his life. That's his baby brother now!!
#erinwantstowrite#ao3#ao3 fanfic#leap of faith ao3#peter parker#leap of faith catch me if you can#leap of faith#miles morales#peter parker is a GOOD mentor#a great one even#he takes that shit so seriously despite it looking like he's always just telling jokes from an outside perspective#you know those folders you go home with when you're a kid#the ones where your teacher puts stickers and talks about how your day/week went and your homework#peter has one of those that's really just a journal written to make it look like miles is taking after school classes with him at SI#and miles has to give it to his parents to look over#“You got three gold stars today!”#“yeah 'cause i didn't get blown up :)”#“that's my boy!”#rio was like “wtaf” at first but she quickly was like “oh so if anyone is gonna help miles stay alive it's this kid”#thank you for the ask!
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I love that Shiva meets Duke and decides that she has another kid now
Genuinely the Shiva-Duke interactions were so good in Outsiders I desperately need more of them. It's funny because she gets invested in him after the panel below, like look at her face:
She's like 'wow this kid is hilarious I'm going to adopt him now'. On a more serious note, I love that she is the alternative to Batman throughout the series, but she's not automatically the worse option just because she's a) not Batman and b) a woman of colour. She represents choice and agency, a choice and agency Bruce cannot give because of his White perspective:
And Duke sides with her immediately (the below panel is actually before Shiva makes her offer):
This is lowkey peak Duke characterisation because he's the person who calls Batman out, who doesn't have a personal stake in Bruce being right. His sense of justice has never been imparted through the Bat symbol, which honestly should mean very little to him. Shiva recognises this. Bruce offers him safety - Shiva offers action. Because she knows, without hesitation, that Duke Thomas will always choose action.
#duke thomas#lady shiva#bruce wayne#ask#on my knees begging for lady shiva to drop into wfa and kill wfa duke#she would look at him and be like ??? you're not duke thomas#um anyway read we are robin and batman & the outsiders 2019 and you're literally set on duke for life#batman & the signal/cursed wheel is extra (i have my gripes with them tho they're mostly good and important)#if you can't imagine your duke thomas cussing batman out that is NOT duke thomas
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*sigh* thoughts on Nintendo's botw/totk timeline shenanigans and tomfoolery?
tbh. my maybe-unpopular opinion is that the timeline is only important when a game's place on the timeline seriously informs the way their narrative progresses. the problem is that before botw we almost NEVER got games where it didn't matter. it matters for skyward sword because it's the beginning, and it matters for tp/ww/alttp (and their respective sequels) because the choices the hero of time makes explicitly inform the narrative of those games in one way or another. it matters which timeline we're in for those games because these cycles we're seeing are close enough to oot's cycle that they're still feeling the effects of his choices. botw, however, takes place at minimum 10 thousand years after oot, so its place on the timeline actually functionally means nothing. botw is completely divorced from the hero of time & his story, so what he does is a nonissue in the context of botw link and zelda's story. thus, which timeline botw happens in is a nonissue. honestly I kind of liked the idea that it happened in all of them. i think there's a cool idea of inevitability that can be played with there. but the point is that the timeline exists to enhance and fill in the lore of games that need it, and botw/totk don't really need it because the devs finally realized they could make a game without the hero of time in it.
#i really do have a love-hate relationship with this timeline#because it's FASCINATING lore. genuinely. and i think it carries over the themes of certain games REALLY well#but i also think it's indicative of a trend in loz's writing that has REALLY annoyed me for a long time#which is this intense need to cling to oot#and on a certain level i get it. that was your most successful game probably ever. and it was an AMAZING game.#and i think there's definitely some corporate profit maximization tied up in this too--oot was an insane commercial success therefore you'r#not allowed to make new games we need you to just remake oot forever and ever#and that really annoys me because it makes certain games feel disjointed at best and barely-coherent at worst.#i think the best zelda games on the market are the ones where the devs were allowed to really push what they were working with#oot. majora. botw. hell i'd even put minish cap in there#these are games that don't quite follow what was the standard zelda gameplay at their time of release. they were experimental in some way#whether that be with graphics or puzzle mechanics or open-world or the gameplay premise in its entirety. there's something NEW there#and because the devs of those games were given that level of freedom the gameplay really enforces the narrative. everything feels complete#and designed to work together. as opposed to gameplay that feels disjointed or fights against story beats. you know??#so I think that the willingness to allow botw and totk to exist independently from the timeline is good at the very least from a developmen#standpoint because it implies a willingness to. stop making shitty oot remakes and let developers do something interesting.#and yes i do very much fear that the next 20 years of zelda will be shitty BOTW remakes now#in which botw link appears and undergoes the most insane character assassination youve ever seen in your life#but im trying to be optimistic here. if botw/totk can exist outside the timeline then we may no longer be stuck in the remake death loop#and i'm taking eow as a good sign (so far) that we're out of the death loop!! because that game looks NOTHING like botw or oot.#fingers crossed!!#anyway sorry for the game dev rant but tldr timeline good except when it's bad#asks#zelda analysis
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To terminally-ill disabled people: you aren't going to be forgotten. You deserve a space here in this world no matter how long you'll be here. You deserve every chance to be happy, to be welcomed, to be understood, to be accommodated, and to be taken care of to the fullest extent. You haven't "given up," you are so incredibly important, and it takes so much to be in your shoes. I hope you can find pride in who you are. Your existence is meaningful.
#disability#watched a video about a terminally-ill person and... though he's gone i could tell he's such a bright light im this world#the whole 'dont give up!' mentality is just... disheartening. you haven't given up; you have already done enough#if you cannot stay on this earth for long just know that you aren't bad for it#yes it can be tragic and horrifying but... you aren't terrible and you have tried and i know it#whatever you're feeling is only natural and there is no shame in it#i know this is an outsider looking in but i hope that maybe this could help in some tiny miniscule way? maybe that's hubris huh
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Kingdom Hearts 3 - Arendelle
#kingdom hearts 3#kh3#arendelle#scenery#my gif#it's nighttime when you first arrive in this world and you get to see the auroras shimmering in the sky#it's very beautiful but once you reach a certain point in the game it becomes daytime and you're not able to view this world at night again#that's pretty unique and i can't think of any other worlds that are like that#except maybe the kingdom of corona when you see the lanterns fly at night but that's just for a short segment#at least san fransokyo gives you a choice to view the city during night or day#anyways i'm glad i had an older save file that i was able to return back to so i could get shots of this world at night#i would have included elsa's castle but every angle i tried looked really awkward and bad lol#i don't use mods when collecting footage so some things are out of my hands when trying to get a nice shot#how sad is it that the interior of her castle is fully modeled (you can see right through the front doors) but you can't go inside#all of the characters stand in a line outside the castle and i wonder why they couldn't just hang out indoors#let me in. let me innnnnn
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as someone who has sabred open one (1) bottle of champagne in her life, I am taking the firm stance that dedicated Champagne Sabres spoil the fun
either use a sword (looks really cool, the whole point of the exercise in my opinion) or use like a butter knife (economical, very impressive because most people don't realize that you use the dull side of the blade anyway so they'll think "whoa, this person can slash open champagne WITH A DULL KNIFE???")
there's nothing cool about doing it with a knife that's clearly not a sword, but also not a kitchen knife that you just happen to have lying around for other purposes and casually use to show off your sabrage prowess
#also how often do you really have to sabre open champagne in your everyday life#if it's every day I think you may have a drinking problem#you're supposed to do it outdoors anyway so what you take everybody outside and you carefully take out your Special Champagne-Only Knife#and then you open it and everybody applauds politely and you take your special knife back to the cupboard for another month or so?#now a sword can serve other purposes#even if it's just there to look really cool#champagne sabres don't look cool. I looked them up. they're sad tiny baby sabres#and expensive! like just get a real sabre at that point! a decorative repro will do and probably be cheaper!
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Words on Chapter 120
“You became what you hated most.”
Point Nr. 1: When Teru attacked Kou with spirit lightning to save Nene, Kou was already a ghost.
I am going to throw out a seemingly controversial take here immediately: Teru did NOT KILL Kou and additionally, there are NO PARALLELS between him and Hanako/Amane within the current events and arguably most of the entire manga. Especially not in relation to his hate of Hanako for having killed his twin brother.
This is going to be a very detailed and long one, so have fun.
In chapter 118, Sousuke and Kou are dragged into the exact same door, next to which Aoi later finds Nene's hair clip laying around. We know from the current chapter that this door leads to the basement of the Red House and the opening of the well. We also already know what purpose this well had, since it was established in chapters 68 and 80, that this is the well leading into the pit to which the Kannagi were sacrificed as offerings to a god.
It's a pit of sacrificial corpses, which due to the events of chapter 118 where Sousuke and Kou were dragged into that door and down to that basement, as well as this current one where Kou's possessed spirit tries dragging Nene into it, is clearly a spot still piled up with sacrificial bodies, nowadays the victims of the Red House. And those two boys were both thrown in already.
So now back to the scene where Teru attacks Kou!
Teru specifically uses his spirit lightning to slash at Kou’s hand gripping onto Nene. His sword blade never comes anywhere near Kou's body and we know for a fact that, while spirit lightning can hurt humans who are to some degree supernatural-
It has never been shown to go so far as to chop off limbs or leave very long lasting damages. (Which again, Kou’s hand being chopped off wasn't from Teru's blade either, it never came anywhere near Kou or Nene.)
After the attack, Kou's entirely blood and gore-free wound is shown and he suddenly starts crumbling into mist, exactly like most of the supernaturals did throughout the manga, showing us that this is exactly what a supernatural looks like when they’re exorcised!
Point Nr. 2: Teru knew Kou was already dead.
Alright, buckle in.
When we see Amane kill Tsukasa in flashbacks, it is bloody. He's got him pinned to the floor, using a knife to stab him in the torso, clearly spaced out in some way but committing a very real murder on a very real, living person beneath him.
Without even fully getting into just how completely different Teru's and Kou's dynamics are with each other, in comparison to the situation Amane/Hanako and Tsukasa have going on, you can't just claim that two characters are “parallels” to one another simply because they both happen to have siblings? Tsukasa and Amane were twins, Teru and Kou are not, they’re not even each other's only siblings, they have Tiara there too. Amane was never the one to sacrifice his childhood and future for Tsukasa's wellbeing, he killed him. Teru didn’t take his brother's life, the Red House did.
Tsukasa and Amane always had a very strange dynamic, glued by the hip and overly dependent on one another, Tsukasa even sacrifices animals and later himself to the wishing entity to grant Amane a chance at life without constant pain and illness. For several reasons Amane wants less and less to do with his brother as time goes on, they're still close, but Amane’s keeping his secrets from Tsukasa, and he in turn even accuses Amane of wanting him gone again. Amane immediately refutes that, yet still through a series of still somewhat unclear events, Amane later ends up brutally killing his own brother with what looks to be a kitchen knife (so very likely at home) on the floor, very dazed, but clearly intending to hurt Tsukasa.
Now back to a member of the “I professionally catch strays from the fandom” trio.
I’m going to remind everyone of the fact that this isn't the first time Teru has attacked Kou with his spirit lightning within the last few chapters. A couple chapters prior, when Sousuke invites Kou to search the school for his missing upperclassmen, they encounter the Red House. Aka Tsukasa's possessed soul most likely, since it only seems to take on the appearance of victims it already devoured and we know from the Yugi family photo in chapter 119 that Tsukasa must have died either before or after he went into the red house as a 4 year old, since he doesn't show up in the photo even when he would've still been very young. (This is a bit of a timeline discrepancy, considering the clock keepers went back to 1968 and not 1959 when Tsukasa first goes into the Red House, but I won't get into that right now.)
After this encounter, Kou gets possessed from chasing the entity around and right as he's about to seriously hurt Sousuke, Teru interrupts them by blasting Kou with spirit lighting, a thing he acts VERY CALM about (keep that in mind!). His stance is measured, he's clearly using a lot of force here too despite not using his preferred weapon, it even leaves Kou knocked out and a bit charred on the ground, but clearly not severely hurt in any way.
When even Akane points out how this was a bit overboard, Teru basically assures him that this wouldn't actually hurt Kou, he consistently has a ton of confidence in his brother's toughness.
This also shows he has experience with also using spirit lightning on possessed people and that it proves severely damaging or even fatal on supernaturals, but seemingly never on living humans.
And yet, attention back to the moment it all goes down: Teru is clearly screaming Kou's name in distress, moving to slice the space BETWEEN him and Nene, intending likely to merely free Nene from Kou's grip. If his intention was to just exorcise the entity possessing Kou’s body like he did earlier (in a very calm manner), why didn’t he just blast Kou with spirit lightning again? Why was he screaming his name with a face of agony before even making his attack?
It's because he already knew by this point, that wasn't Kou's living body, that was his ghost. Kou was already dead. He was too late to save him and now all he can do is stop him from dragging another victim down into the well.
Point Nr. 3: But how did he notice?
We can guess Teru has almost completely different senses from anyone else in the cast. He feels and notices things even Kou, Nene and Akane, all of whom can see supernaturals, don't notice. He mentioned seeing literal cracks between the near and far shores in chapter 73, he saw Hanako looking like that on the rooftop, he was the only one to immediately react to Nr. 6’s ambush attack and he is the ONLY ONE in the red house to feel a cold dread and fear of something powerful overcome him, a sensation neither Kou, Akane or Nene felt at all in the house. And again they can all see supernaturals, but they're not attuned to them like he is.
He could see down that well in complete darkness, immediately knowing that what he was looking at were the corpses of Kou, Sousuke and countless other victims. Akane needed a flashlight to get even a glimpse of what had made Teru collapse at the sight, he couldn't see it immediately, no one's eyes are as sharp as Teru's.
He knows supernaturals, he knows the clear difference between a ghost and living human, even when others can't see those. He knew from the moment he laid eyes on his little brother standing on the edge of that well, that he was already dead, a spirit walking without a living body.
He never “killed” Kou, there is no parallel between him and Hanako. He exorcised the shackled spirit of his beloved brother, possessed and puppeteered around by the red house to lure in more victims, because it knew they'd let their guards down around the sunshine boy Kou. He was one of Nene's best friends after all.
Kou didn't want this, he would have never wanted to hurt Nene or lure anyone else to the same fate he and Sousuke endured here. In his very last moments, there was no anger, no blame towards Teru for attacking him to stop him from dragging Nene down. And none of the morbid fascination and happiness Tsukasa felt at being killed by his own brother.
All he felt was glad that Nene was safe now, hoping he'd get to see her again when the world turned back to how it once was.
Endword!
So there you have it. Usually I don't make these kinds of commentaries for things I read, because quite frankly I don't care and I’m too busy to make these, thank you for sticking with me through this because huuhhh it took hours to make dear god. Props to everyone who makes these more often, solid troopers fr. I’ll make an exception for TBHK this time (and maybe if I’m asked to again)- solely because I see so many takes that I find are just very strange or completely wrong and that last chapter had me actually super interested in this series again.
I will take this is due in part to the very young average age of readers for this series and the fact it is often (as much as I enjoy reading this hot garbage, find its worldbuilding super fun and love the characters in it), just genuinely not a very well written series. It has an immense amount of plot holes, inconsistent character writing, situations for the sake of it with no proper set up and lets down on a lot of mysteries it builds up because it never resolves them, even several arcs later.
Anyways, if you disagree with my points and/or want to add something to this, feel free to comment, reblog or send in an ask about it. I think discussing stories does the best job at letting people realise things they never noticed before, so I highly encourage doing that lol. Also you made it to the end of this, you get a cookie. If I could bake cookies..
#This analysis is by the main artist Silv btw#since there are 2 people running this blog#When will I manage to finish the stranger things au and other art? Who knows#when my winter vacay starts maybe#If i don't get swarmed with work cause of the winter season#Do u guys know how fun it is to patrol outside at 1am in -10°c?#Not fun unless you're norwegian ig (looking at you Maple)#jibaku shounen hanako kun#toilet bound hanako kun#jshk#tbhk#aoi akane#minamoto teru#tbhk kou#jshk kou#minamoto kou#jshk hanako#hanako kun#tbhk amane#yugi amane#tbhk tsukasa#yugi tsukasa#tbhk nene#yashiro nene#tbhk akane#akane aoi#tbhk aoi#tbhk teru#mitsuba sousuke#tbhk sousuke
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3.13 | ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀꜱᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ʟᴏʀᴅꜱ
link to the post I accidentally wound up prattling endlessly about in the tags 💀
#doctor who#tenth doctor#martha jones#david tennant#freema agyeman#(good god. without even meaning to I went into 'psycho stream of consciousness tagging' mode. whoops)#always thinking of that one post#where OP mentions how the writing tries to make it seem like Ten looked right through Martha/etc#which is a good concept for demonstrating his grief. but also isnt what we really see throughout S3#(not saying he wasn't a grieving MESS because he was. but he's a multi-faceted character and he can grieve AND value Martha simultaneously)#but we see such fierce protective instinct+trust; a bond between them that obviously isn't some one-sided affair#+ his clear intent to impress her/be admired and respected by her (apropos the post that inspired this sentiment)#but RTD obviously isn't the most infallible of writers#*cough* [list of reasons I cut down b/c long] *cough*#He can make Martha say “he's not seeing me/he doesn't look at me” but then you just watch with your eyes and you get a different story#It's like the opposite of when Moffat tries to make you believe someone is super important through bold claims without showing his work#instead RTD tries to make you believe Ten is functionally blind to Martha's existence while showing numerous examples of the contrary#then bring in the novels+myspace blog+cartoon that he all signed off on. Which tie together to create a canon backdrop#basically I said all of that to say this—#it's the whole reason I had to make this blog to get this sort of stuff off my chest (even if it's just for me sometimes)—#Ten not only SAW Martha—he trusted+respected+enjoyed+adored her. And it's a good thing#it doesn't cheapen his grief. I feel like people must think it does which is why I constantly see bad unnecessary takes about them#it just means that Martha was SO important to him and it's ok. they had a killer friendship outside the unrequited minutiae and it's ok#there's even a comic where 'someone' makes him believe she's Martha and he makes her change her appearance because “it's still too raw”#Just saying you don't say that sort of thing about someone whose existence you're all blasé about#Martha already gets fucked by the narrative in enough ways without people totally missing her significance in the Doctor's life#you don't have to ship them to appreciate them on a deeper level#anyway. fuck. if you actually read all of these then I'm so sorry#creating this blog has taught me that there are only like two people who feel the same way about tenmartha matters and it’s fine 😂#but if I didn’t give myself an outlet it would probably form a tumor SO there we are then
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no, but really, we need to talk about the casual objectification that has become the fallback discourse of the internet: if you're pretty and dressed nicely, you're a slut. and if you're even vaguely outside of their body standard, you're fucking disgusting.
too-frequently, people position sex workers as being "the problem". they sneer you're addicted to pornography, you don't know what a real woman looks like. but real women are in pornography. the real bodies on display are not the issue here: the issue is that other people feel extremely confident when commenting on someone's physique.
2000's super-thin is slowly worming its way back into the public ideal. recently i saw someone get told to "go for a run", despite the fact she was on the thinner side of average. not that it would ever be appropriate to say that: but it's kind of like sticker shock when you see it. people think that is fat? holy shit. do they just have no idea about things?
but what are you going to do about it? that's the problem, right. because chances are - you're a normal person. we can say normalize carrying fat on your body, but we are not the billion-dollar diet industry. we are not the billion-dollar fashion industry. we are just, like. people. who are trying to make content on the internet, without being treated shittily.
as someone who has been on both sides of things: you are treated better when you are thin and pretty. this is statistically correct. i am not saying that you cannot be bullied for being thin; i'm saying there are objective institutional biases against certain bodytypes. there are videos of men and women who lost weight all saying: i now know for a fact exactly how much worse you're treated. in the comments, some asshole inevitably says something akin to you deserved to be dehumanized when you were fat.
which means that ... the easiest thing to do is be pretty and thin. it is the path of least resistance, because of course it is, because any time you post a picture of yourself without a thigh gap, someone immediately comments something like you need to try a diet.
the other half is also dehumanizing though, huh, just in a different way. when i put on makeup and nice clothes, i am told i slept my way to the top as a professional. do you know how many women in STEM have told me they purposefully dress to "unimpress" because they already struggle to be taken seriously and if they're ever considered pretty - it for some reason takes away from their authority.
so they make it seem like it's your fault. you, existing in a body - it's your fault! if you didn't want shitty comments, don't have a body. they position us against each other like chess pieces; vying for male attention we don't even need.
and i can be an authority on this unless you think i'm fat and unattractive. when i am pretty and thin, i'm an activist. when i am just a normal person who makes a good point: i am immediately dismissed. nobody fucking believes you if you're not seen as attractive. you literally lose value. you cease to exist.
but the whole time, it feels like - is anyone actually grounded the fuck in reality? the line of "pretty and thin" keeps shifting. nobody seems to understand what "a normal weight" even looks like, because it's not something that exists - you cannot tell a person's health by looking at their body. even if you think you could tell that, even if you're sure a person is dangerously overweight - people are not your dolls. they do not need to be dressed up or displayed properly to soothe your aesthetics. you aren't concerned for them, you're stealing their agency. you don't get to say if they're "allowed" to take pictures and post them on the internet - you don't get to tell them how to exist.
people hide behind "the obesity epidemic" without any actual qualifications. they crow things about "normalizing unhealthiness".
but it's bullshit. i have visible abs. there is a pair of parallel lines on my body, even when i'm relaxed; where my obliques meet my abdominal wall. i am proud of this because it means i'm strong, because i overcame an eating disorder only to be ripped as fuck. it is genetic and physical luck that i even get any definition, i'm pleased as punch.
but it does mean that my abdominal wall sticks out a little bit. the other day i posted a video of myself dancing, and, for a moment, my shirt slipped. you could see a little bit of my stomach. i was cartwheeling to the floor. moments before this, i'd had my foot over my head.
a guy slid into my DMs. a row of vomiting emojis prefaced: you should really lose some weight before you think about dancing.
i stared at it for a long time. there was a time when i would have been triggered by this, where it would have encouraged me to starve myself. i would have ignored the fact i'm flexible, agile, good at jumping: i would have lost the weight for a stranger's passing comment. i would have found myself and my body fucking disgusting.
and for what? to please what? because why? so that he can exist in this world without an unchallenged eyeball? what would my self-hatred even accomplish? usually i write paragraphs. obviously. on this particular occasion, in this body i've been at war with for ages: i just felt exhausted.
it shouldn't be even worth saying. it shouldn't be hard to explain. all of this emotional turmoil when he cannot even comprehend the most basic truth: i am not an object on display for him.
#spilled ink#writeblr#warm up#like if im getting fatshamed. babe......... wake up#is there fat on my body? yes :)#btw this behavior wouldn't be okay even if I WAS overweight!!! that is my point!!!#it is both that people have no idea what weight is supposed to look like#and even if they DID... they do not seem to understand that PEOPLE ARE NOT DOLLS#YOU DO NOT GET TO TELL THEM HOW TO EXIST#if you respond anything akin to ''but raquel there IS an obesity epidemic''#you're blocked and reported.#go fucking DONATE TO A FOOD BANK THEN. volunteer in a food desert. start a free fitness program#GO GET A DEGREE AS A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL AND PRACTICE IN NUTRITION IN UNDERPRIVILEDGED LOCATIONS#FIGURE OUT HOW TO LOWER FOOD COSTS. FIGURE OUT HOW TO NORMALIZE AND STANDARDIZE#ACCESS TO FARM-FRESH FOOD. PROVIDE ACTUAL FREE ACCESS TO OUTSIDE ACTIVITIES#FIGURE OUT HOW TO TEACH PEOPLE HEALTHY CHOICE MAKING WHILE ALSO LOWERING THE COST OF MEALS.#THE AVERAGE GROCERY BILL OF THE AMERICAN CITIZEN HAS QUADRUPILED IN THE LAST YEAR.#SHUT. THE FUCK. UP!!!!!!!!!#you don't want to help these people!!!!!#you want to bully them but still feel like a good person!#you want to be justified in your hatred of an entire CLASS of people!!!#you don't give a fuck about how it makes them feel!!!!#you care ONLY about whether or not YOU get to VIRTUE SIGNAL that YOURE so thin and pretty!!!!#it is BECAUSE of people like you#and the fact you tolerate fatphobia - BECAUSE of that normalization. that men like the one who called me fat#feel like they can get away with it.#bc there's a line for you where you WOULD be okay with it. where if i WASNT thin you'd be okay with it.#which means the line can always be pushed in a certain direction. and it's always going to appeal to male aesthetics.#''well you didn't deserve it'' maybe fucking NOBODY does babe. maybe we should just all agree not to comment on ppls bodies!!
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Hi, sorry to be anon, but can I ask to see the Vargas family post trick or treating? Divying the goods, or just being tired from the event? Thank you and Happy Halloween!
Day 30 - Fine, but you're taking nightmare duty
#Requestober#My art#Vargas#Scriabin#Edgar#Todd#Shmee#Called it on being late today lol - not bad for the first (and hopefully last!) of the season tho!#Also no prob on the anon :) As long as you're following the rules it's all good! Anon's there for a reason <3#And Happy (Almost) Halloween! :D#They're back from Trick Or Treat! Edgar and Scriabin in this year's featured costumes haha <3#Once again refusing to show them outside the apartment lol it's just a reliable setpiece!#And since I didn't get any ISaT reqs this time around I decided to throw in a reference myself lol#Toddfrin hehe little guy <3#The adults are very tired from all the running around - Scriabin especially haha his lack of impulse control and being new#Looks like he managed to keep his costume on the whole night tho good for him ♪#Even exhausted he's still going to find some way to poke at Edgar just his nature haha#Todd was going to listen! He's a good kid <3#We all know there's no way Scriabin's getting up after all the excitement haha barely holding onto the back of the couch#We'll just have to pretend Todd gets perfect sleep and nothing spooky happens :') It could pan out that way! Maybe!#I always enjoy this midway-to-chibi style hehe it's cute! But still a little lanky#Little bit quicker and good and cute ♪ Enjoyable
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