#or u get away with a lot of shit and ppl tolerate u because of ur money and status

[wttcsms]

arranged marriage au but both you and character don't want to get married. however, in order to receive your inheritance, you have to agree to try your best to make this relationship work + because of similar familial pressure, character is also compelled to see this marriage through. however, your family does understand that if it's character that breaks off the engagement, they'll understand that you tried your best and you get full access to your trust fund and you don't have to tie the knot. for character, if you break off the engagement, he's in the clear, too.

so now, it's a competition between you two. unbeknownst to the other, y'all are both actively trying to get the other to get so frustrated that you'll send the loser running for the hills, crying to get the engagement broken.

[rawbin-hsr]

The previous anon articulated it so well bc I just saw what they're talking about and I'm honestly confused why they thought u were saying anything wrong like 😭😭 are we sure we have the same guy here? Aventurine while yes knows what being loved feels like, he's gone through enough things and changes in life that that little frame of reference won't serve him well, especially within a romantic context bc he doesn't have ANY reference.

I read what you wrote as him not really meaning to (even reread) and yeah, he wouldn't Purposely want to be abusive to his romantic partner, but it still borders on it. What a lot of ppl get wrong is that, emotional abuse doesn't have to always mean the perpetrator is fully aware of it themself.

Maybe bc I myself have bpd, but it's so easy to see. When someone's avoiding negative feelings they have about themself (jealousy, insecurity etc) they can easily externalize this blame (and for him, that's so much more likely, it's literally a defense mechanism) or even, projecting his own view of himself on how you view him only to end up upset. (And then, the random clinginess that comes after this pushing away, why would it happen if not for trying to convince you to stay even though what he keeps doing is generally not a good thing to do in a relationship?) He wouldn't have known healthy attachment, didn't grow up with a safety net to be comfortable with that, hell, he thinks people closest to him (in canon) are sort of "tolerating" him. Are we really surprised?

Like, you never said aventurine is doing it with intent or even awareness bc yea he isn't!! He'd realize some of his actions sure, but stuff like "pushing you away" is probably shit he genuinely considers good for you, and it's not even like completely wrong he's in a high and risky position. Doesn't mean it wouldn't hurt like a mf, and I think that's the biggest tragedy of it all, because he doesn't fully realize how bad his actions are from another pov, and it's not like a single Convo can get him to understand that.

Anyway, sorry that was a lot more incoherent than I thought and I was firmly stating a lot of things bc I can pull up stuff to back my claim but ALSO bc they pissed me off if u don't like something just scroll I've been doing that for years on this app I never felt the need to go yell at someone bc I don't agree with how they interpret a character 😒😒😒😒 I hope ur feeling better, rsd sucks ass I always get so overwhelmed whenever I experience it but ur intent came across very clearly actually dw

I’m literally in tears I’m so grateful multiple people are taking the time to reassure me thank you so much 🥹🥹🥹 I was really doubting myself and my own take on him, it makes me feel so relieved I’m not the only one who has this specific take on him haha I was lowkey worrying I was a terrible person for a moment there 😭

And yes, exactly !!!! I think you were very coherent in this, in fact I think you formulated what I meant to say better than I did 😭😭 Like there’s a lot, a LOT of nuance to it !!! He never does it out of malice. He just doesn’t know any better. He tries to do what’s right and what’s best for you, he’s just… kind of not good at that because his whole perspective is skewed.

I do still think they were right that I shouldn’t have used the word ‘abuse’. It’s a very loaded term, and I think abuse requires a power dynamic, which is something I think he would try to eliminate in a relationship. Like, yes, he is a powerful man and he sort of needs some leverage to stay in control (of both his own life and his relationship with you), but I think he fucking hates the idea of being “above you” in any way. (Though to be fair he still could unintentionally create an uneven power dynamic — he’s the one mostly in charge of when the two of you interact. I think he loathes himself even more when he realises that.) I think it would be best to stick to the word “toxic” because it feels most fitting from my pov

[txxfiles]

hello?

I don't know what to write about this month! so I’m just going to stream of consciousness and see where we go. 

I was going to write about my holiday but I started a travel journal and did like 2 days and then was so exhausted every night that I didn’t do it! It was an amazing holiday tho, like once in a lifetime sorta shit. it was a bit hit and miss if we would even go but we did and it was wonderful and I appreciated having so much time with my brother as I miss him. It was so full on tho like it was a group tour thing and it was like go go go and we walked 20 thousand steps one day bc my brother and I were like ‘Yeah sure we’ll climb that mountain with u no stress’ and then basically got lapped by the American women over 60 who came with us lmao. I was so careful as well with putting on suncream and shit and I STILL got burnt!!! the curse of being so fair burdens me every day. I am mostly nicely tanned and the redness has gone down so we chill but it’s so funny bc everyone else in my family is so nicely tanned and then there's a tomato girl walking around with them. my freckles have come back tho so that's nice. 

it gave me a lot of time with my thoughts tho, which I hate. Also being forced to spend that much time with my parents is always interesting. the other people in our group were telling them how good of a job they did raising myself and my brother which always makes me feel weird. I don’t think the good parts of my personality have come from my parents, I often value all the bad things about it to them which may seem harsh but my instinctual politeness and willingness to help wasnt fostered by them teaching it to me, it came from fear of getting yelled at if i wasn't this way and getting in trouble for doing anything other than cutting myself in half to do what was asked of me. I hate the person I become when I spend so much time with them as well like I become so angry and snappy and my tolerance for shit just plummets and I come home and it’s like a wave of relief because I feel so much calmer instantly. And then the next minute I feel awful for not seeing them very often and like guilty for having my own life and actually enjoying not seeing them very often. My mother makes a point of talking about not seeing me and missing me and I struggle to wrap my head around the idea of them missing me because when I see them they don’t talk to me! they don’t ask me shit they just take it in turns complaining about the other to me and I’m sat in the middle with my head in my hands wanting to die! I told them both at separate points that I wasn't getting involved and then got the silent treatment and I was just soooooo doneeeeeeee. I’m so grateful I could go on the trip and the highlights totally outweigh the bad bits but it’s hard to remember the good parts when the last 4 days were spent in a state of tension and arguments that I couldn't walk away from because there was nowhere to go! it’s like a constant battle of being grateful and then being annoyed over and over again and I don’t know how to deal with it so I just don’t! 

Going away with your family at my age is weird as well. my brother and I look very young so everyone else in the group very much assumed we were younger than we are which was funny and I guess a blessing. no shame in it but one of the other ppl in our group wasn't much older than me and she’s married with a house and a stable job and I just sat there like ahahahahahaaaaaaaaa. I know it’s bad to compare yourself to others and I’ve gotten better at not doing it but in situations like that, it’s hard. I said last time how I feel like I’m behind everyone and that's still stuck. I’m not doing bad per se but I’m not really making any money and I’m no closer to starting the career I want and that’s not for lack of trying like I keeeeeep applying for jobs and getting turned down on no response at all and it hurts. I worked so hard for my degree and some days it feels like it was for nothing. I know something will come up soon but the waiting is slowly killing me. 

I didn’t smoke the entire holiday either as I couldn’t because my parents don’t need another reason to be disappointed in me and now I’m back in the UK I can’t afford to buy any cigs but GOD DO I WANT SOME PLEASE. I know it’s bad for u and shit but I just want a little treat. I didn’t miss it when I was away and because I literally couldn't get any it didn’t even really cross my mind bc I was so busy but now I’m back and the corner shop is 5 minutes away i’m like uwu yes pls gimme the lil death stick. I think that's one of my biggest issues, if something is within my reach I literally cannot deny myself it. goes for food, people, drinks whatever, if I can get it I’ll have it even if it’s not a sensible thing to do within the budget I have. I think it stems from my childhood but I’m not getting into that right now. 

In other news, I’m actually having a birthday party for the first time since I was a kid!!! wooo!!! hopefully, I won’t cry this birthday other than from happiness!!!! everyone I’ve asked is well keen as well so I was like yay amazing! and then one of my mates whom my relationship with is so complicated I wouldn’t even know where to start was like ‘Yeah sure I’ll come’ and I was like fab ok and then the NEXT TIME he messaged me he was like ‘oh it’s the FOOTBALL FINAL SO I DON’T KNOW IF I CAN COME’?????????????? HELLO???????????? I’m honestly fuming. I get it, your team might not get to the final again fine whatever but the matches are like in the afternoon so u could still come after???? oh my apologies for thinking I, your friend or whatever whom you have been through an insane amount of shit with, might be A BIT MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE FUCKING FOOTBALL???? I hate men oh my god I’m actually mad and maybe that's selfish but what the fuck. I’m currently leaving him on delivered because I’m not about to start shit between us for the millionth time but considering the conversation we had about new years and how he had fomo you would think he’d wanna come but no. If he does end up changing his mind I’m so tempted to be like ‘nah don’t bother’ but that goes against every single particle of my being so WE’LL SEE. if he tries anything imma whack him (probably) but regardless, it should be fun and it’ll be nice to see all my friends in one place and shit. I’m very nervous about it bc I’m convinced no one will come but everyone I’ve asked has been enthusiastic so hopefully, it goes well. hopefully. I don’t want another birthday where I end up feeling upset or like a burden or whatever. thinking about it reminded me of one birthday I had where my so-called friend made out with the guy I liked when we were in the cinema knowing full well I liked him. good vibes!!! 

anyway, that’s me! once again not particularly positive but I’ve realised I use this as a way to get things off my chest I’m not sure how to properly talk about in person. which I think is kinda the point of this anyway. but regardless, I’m tanned and travelled and back to the grind like the alpha male I am. 

peace out homies

eucalyptus ᡣ • . • 𐭩 ♡

[cutemeat]

What up I haven't watched any sunny for like 3 months so my mind is a perfectly smooth blank slate - what seasons/eps are you poking around at most rn, I'll go watch them too :)

!!!! OOO yes ok i have a few eps ive been specifically fixated on esp since s15 came out...

i have been dissecting "The Gang Tries Desperately to Win an Award" and "Gets Quarantined" because they really reflect the writing of season 15 and I think its probs intentional.. mostly the way the gang describes 'playing the game' in the Award ep with the bright lights, fun colors, and funny banter... reflects the visual/surface-level aesthetics and writing of s15 and the subtext of Gets Quarantined (I wrote up an essay on this but forgot to post it so hopefully ill get around to that soon LOL) is very useful when reading s15! so I've been rlly into those eps ... I ESP RECCOMEND COMPARING THE ENDINGS OF "GETS QUARANTINED" AND THE S15 FINALE IF U WANT.. the whole thing abt 'creating a visual harmony' and how the gang does exactly that w audio/visuals at the end of Gets Quarantined and how they Very Much Do Not attain harmony at the end of s15 despite the framing making it seem that way at first glance is just so... so good. mwah.

but also s3 as a whole i have been rlly into the past few months! it's just so great cuz I think s3 perfectly captures most of who these characters are at their core, obv not EXACTLY cuz they were always hiding shit but its so so close... esp when u watch s3 then jump to like s15 u can see so clearly the kind of ppl they're PRETENDING to be in later seasons compared to who they really are in earlier seasons... but also how frank is basically the opposite cuz while the younger half of the gang builds up their facades over the years, frank's facade fades away!!!

and ive also been rlly diving into s13 lately... like oh my god there's so much to that season that I feel like I never see anyone rlly talk abt?? like.. i think its just a time thing. like an episode from season 7 is gonna be a lot more beloved than an ep from s13 by default I think cuz we've just had more Time with it... but man s13 has some rlly good depth in a lot of places. also I just have a good tolerance for 'bad writing' ig so I don't care </3

and lastly ive been obsessed with 'Mops Twice' !!! I've been trying to rlly get a good reading done on that ep... currently, I'm rlly fixated on the ep's use of the color red and esp how its used on the lips of both female characters?? wondering if its sort of a play on the concept of a 'red herring' esp since the color red was used in that kind of way in The Sixth Sense which mac n charlie make a big deal over in s5... idk I just feel like that's another instance where newer seasons don't get as deep analysis but there's a lot there to pick apart!! (my main theory is charlie is an extremely unreliable narrator who makes himself out to be the underdog/hero/victim in a similar fashion to how the narrative of Fight Club can be read... n he makes everyone else out to be the villains in very stereotypical ways complimenting noir tropes.. like deetress being the sorta femme fatales.. macdennis being queercoded villains... idk there's just a lot LOL)

TL;DR... "The Gang Tries Desperately to Win an Award" & "Gets Quarantined" from S9, Seasons 3 & 13, and "Mops Twice" from S14 have been my main focuses as of late!

[rein-ette]

Artie HC cuz even when my brain empty he takes up 60% of it

So I wrote like a 3 paragraphs before I realized I have to premise this with a couple things:

WHY DONT WE CALL ARTIE'S RELATIONSHIPS FOR WHAT THEY ARE. He has friends. He has acquaintances. He has lovers, and kids, and colleagues. Who falls into each category is obviously up to personal interpretation and changes over time, but can we pleaaaaaseeeeee stop pretending Arthur doesn't have friends and that his world is, like, just divided into "me" and "hostile beings".

Okay, having said that, these are the people who I believe fall into each group in 2021:

1. Close Friend Circle: (their relationships are complex, but they're friends, they are, ik arthur has problems with denial but we can call it for what it is) France, Spain, Port, Prussia, Belgium, Ned, Belgium, sometimes Denmark, also Hungary and Austria but they're not really close with artie so much as close with others in the group

2. Personal Friends (they're close with Arthur, but they don't share the same social circles): Norway, Japan, Malta (< so done with Arthur's shit but they frends), India (they were closer before...u kno), former states like Hessen, Saxony, Hanover

3. "Kid"-Friends: Alfred, Matthew

4. Mostly just kids: Zee, Aus, Singapore, HK, Seychelles, etc etc etc etc i can't list everyone

5. My Friend's Kids So I Share Some Responsibility and Can't Bully Them: Brazil, Macau, pr much all Portugal's other former colonies, and Ludwig.

6. Everyone Else: some shade between "i dunno you" to "i wish i didn't know you"

oKiE now the actual hc lol

Arthur's demeanor changes when he's interacting with nations younger than him (groups 3-5) versus his close friends in Europe. This isn't noticeable at meetings or situations where both are present, such as G7 meetings, because he just defaults to factory settings. But it is more pronounced when he's alone with either group. When alone with his kids/younger nations he feels some sort of kinship towards, he's more patient, calm, even tolerant. He's more likely to roll his eyes and brush things off, or let them get away with teasing with a half-hearted glare or a raised eyebrow. He's also quieter, content to listen to the kids chatter while he does something else or just zones out.

However, with Europeans -- especially countries that are considerably older than him like France, Portugal, Spain, Denmark, German states etc. --- he pulls out all the bratty stops. He's a lot snarkier, mischevious, even whiny if he feels really comfortable with the person. He's also more tolerant of physical contact and possessive gestures. For example, if he's with Mattie, Zee and Aus and Alfred puts an arm around his shoulder, he'll shrug it off. If someone tries to tease him about a romantic relationships at a Commonwealth meeting, he'll pretend he didn't hear them. But in the dinner parties after EU meetings, when its just him and the gang, he'll let Francis drape himself all over him, let Bella whisper in his ear, will even curl up with Port on the couch out of his own volition. Even with people like Denmark, Spain, Ned, or Prussia, he's more likely to slap/punch them playfully or go along with flirtatious jokes whereas he normally wouldn't touch them on his own initiative.

This comes as a surprise to a lot of Artie's kids, especially the ones who haven't seen him interact with the European nations on a personal level (mattie, having spent quite a bit of time shadowing Arthur in the 19th-20th centuries, is less surprised). And this is no coincidence. I hc that Arthur tried very damn hard to keep the two spheres of his life (his empire vs other empires) separate, to the point where in his old Victorian estate he would make sure the kids only stayed and played in the West wing while he recieved guests in the East wing, and no one was allowed to go to the other side of the house unless otherwise given permission. Of course nowadays they know that their dad brought lovers home and had some *interesting* relationships, but even when the sex part of diplomacy became normalized for ppl like Al or Matt, they still wouldn't often see Arthur be affectionate or accept affection from anyone, platonic or otherwise. In fact his kids probably knew more about the people Arthur hated than the people who loved him, because the closer he was with someone the more obsessive Arthur was about keeping them away from his kids and never talking about them. This probably stemmed from a semi-conscious fear that if the two worlds ever mixed one person might have too many cards to play against Arthur, ex. Port close with him and with his kids? = dangerous; Mattie being an sweet little baby angel but also knowing all his dirt? = danGerouS (he ended up knowing anyways). And was he wrong? The Alfred-Francis combo f*ckin ruined him, so. Some precedent there, for sure.

But yeah, because of that compartimentalization now when Arthur's kids happen to see him pull out the impish smirk or whiny pout with his friends, which is still exceedingly rare, they react with varying levels of shock plus anything from mild disgust to awww uwu.

From the other perspective, I think a lot of England's friends are still surprised by how gentle he is with his kids when he's not angry with them. I don't think countries like Spain, Ned or France had very loving relationships with their colonies at all -- it was mostly a cold distance or calculated affection. Of course Arthur was also far more strict in the 19th century, but even so there's an undercurrent of tenderness that, except for Port, I don't think the other European powers managed to create to the same extent.

[harvestdew]

I love your character dynamic posts! Could you do one for cleo and sebastian or haley and Cleo?

aw thank you so much! i was struggling to pick which one to do but i'm gonna just do haley and cleo because i've been itching to flesh them out besides "haha prep goth gfs"

haley + cleo

cleo and haley are initially catty towards each other. they had a bad first meeting where cleo bumped into haley and made her drop her camera - which is a completely valid reason to be angry at someone, but cleo is a moody young adult who ran away so she doesn't say sorry

so before they were getting along haley just grit her teeth and pretended to be nice in front of kiki. cleo doesn't even try though even if her cousin gets on her case about it. otherwise, haley would toss insults or even her typical backhanded compliments. then cleo would get mad and start arguing with her for no reason in the town square. alex has probably made a comment like "you guys bicker like a married couple lol"

IDK how to explain how they started dating. it happens cuz i'm cheesy 😭 i took a little inspo from this one "to all the boys i've loved before" haley prompt. emily finds a box of letters that haley wrote to theoretically send to people she was into including alex (even when that crush is probably comphet), and sends them out. alex is about to confront haley about it and she can either a) have the most awkward conversation with alex or b) literally do anything but that. i figure alex is one of her closest friends if not one of her only ones so it's not really worth risking over what she thinks is gonna be her rejecting him? so when alex tries to say smthing to her about is and haley just lies and says "i'm going out with the new girl" hoping it'll deter him. the only reason why cleo agrees to this is because she hates alex, which is why she feels bad for haley pleading her case to her. it's not supposed to go on that long but haha 😳what if we were both girls and we pretended to date and then fell in love

fake dating period is awkward at first! they're forced to hang out with each other more to make it look like they're dating and for a bit it's like forcefully tolerating each other til haley gives in and says "we're just making ourselves more miserable" and they GUESS they have to know each other. it's kinda smug at first and they probably can't get through a single convo without scoffing at each other. but then it reaches a boiling point where they realize they have a lot more in common than they think

haley definitely catches feeling when she goes through pictures on her new camera, where she finds some she took of cleo and thinks "oh. shit lol"

somewhere along the way they do become friends. it's full of a lot of high-fiving to make fun of ppl, anticipating each other's needs, and hanging out with each other willingly and having fun w/o realizing. haley continues to mock cleo but more lovingly

that one pic of the girl sitting on the other girl and doing her makeup is them. that's it

cleo and haley don't trade clothes but cleo gives in and lets haley style her. haley is surprisingly good at understanding her style, but sometimes dresses her girlfriend up in shit she hates. in any other scenario she'd be peeved but she's okay with it if haley thinks she looks cute </3

cleo hates modeling and probably won't be working in the field anymore but models for haley and emily's clothing business for free. more generally, she grows accustomed to helping haley with her photography even if it means going to lengthy means to get exactly what haley wants. haley could spend 4 hours taking pictures on the beach and cleo would be passed out on the sand waiting for her

haley flicks kiki's head but cleo doesn't let haley do it to her. she does it to haley instead LOL (lovingly ofc)

haley is fine and maybe (?) even revels in pda because she likes bragging about her partner. cleo hates pda only because she doesn't like people in her business and feels like everything it happens she will implode

haley is super supportive of cleo being in sam's band even if she doesn't like the genre of music. she reminds me of knives in scott pilgrim fangirling over sex bob-omb and passing out from excitement. but definitely a supportive gf who wears band merch and unashamedly promotes her partner's band! haley is also the one who encourages her to get back into music and pitches the idea to sam to get cleo a new bass (she got upset and broke hers before coming to pelican town) as a gift :')

both are equally aggressive and overprotective of each other. it's hard to say which one is more since i do think cleo OR haley can usually handle themselves. but if haley is upset because of alex or someone cleo will go for the kill

and that's it :D there's probably more i'm remembering but thank u sm for the ask!

[thefreshchannel]

What do u think ur fav td charas would be like drunk

I’m gonna do some of my favs and whether they drink or not

I already talked about courtney being a lightweight and a crying drunk like she gets giggly at first and likes to sing out of the blue but then she just remembers her party’s probably watched total drama and cries and projectile vomits because she can’t hold her alcohol. Super embarrassed about it the day after and reports any videos of her wasted on social media only to be met with “if u dont like this untag urself” and she threatens with lawyers. Obviously she’s not gonna follow through with that but it enrages her lol

Heather pretty much has a high tolerance for alcohol and will start getting a little buzzed after many drinks. She starts yelling probably and brings up stuff that was supposed to be a secret and laughs a lot like “hey leshawna remember when u told me this? Oh that was supposed to be a secret hahaha oops!” (I like to think she likes to go clubbing with leshawna bc fuck whatever happened in tdwt theyre besties)

Alejandro also has a high tolerance. He only allows himself to feel a bit buzzed for fun, probably refuses to let himself get too wasted or a mess. Probably laughs a lot and stumbles over his words and mixes a lot of his spanish with his english. Can start dancing a lot with the bros and singing.

Trent likes to drink as if he was a famous musician at parties and attempts to get lit but becomes an emotional drunk. He’ll obviously bring his guitar to whatever party he’s invited to and like perform but the moment he gets to an emotional song he’ll start crying and then ppl go like “geoff man this guy’s bringin the party down” and geoff has to get trent like “bro it’s cool take a lil break” and gives him water. Trent then knocks out and falls asleep and wakes up with a massive headache and without any memory of the events at the party and likes to think he was very much a party animal. Geoff doesnt have the heart to tell him otherwise.

I wanted to be like uwu owen dont drink but realistically this man loves craft beers. He has a high alcohol tolerance as well and is mostly the laughing drunk and life of the party. Once he is fully wasted he would probably take his shirt off and dance and pass out and not remember anything the day after, but that would be after many many MANY drinks. I’d like to think he started drinking young like maybe geoff would invite him to parties and sneak alcohol in and at first owen would be like “but we can’t drink alcohol :0” but then let loose and join the fun.

Noah likes to drink in moderation. He can also make some fancy drinks like bartenders do? Probably gets home after work and has a little drink of wine. Never lets it get past one or two. He knows his limits and how much a lightweight he is. When he’s drunk he’s also a laughing oversharing drunk and very VERY clumsy and constantly tripping over things. Owen has to care for him when he’s in this situation which is when noah gets clingy and kisses him all over and goes like “big guyyyyy carryy meeeee :(“ the next day he definitely feels it and can barely get up. Also a puking disaster.

I’d like to think eva either doesn’t drink or does drink but very moderately and would have a high alcohol tolerance anyways. Izzy does drink however, and despite having a high tolerance for alcohol she drinks so much when she’s at parties like she probably would do shots and beer pong games and do the stand up keg thing and probably shotguns beers and keep joining drinking games after that. And she wins all of them lol. She’s twice as crazy and giggly when she’s drunk but just moves a lot slower and clumsier. Tries to put stuff in her mouth that isn’t edible. Blacks out and wakes up in another location and walks away as if nothing happened. Whenever eva is invited with her eva ends up babysitting and being the DD.

Rock and spud are party animals. Definitely have high alcohol tolerance so it takes a lot for them to get drunk but they will still aim for that anyways. Spud for the most part can chug many drinks and his delayed reaction would make it so he starts getting drunk moments after which is why spud tends to think the alcohol isnt having effect and keeps on drinking. Both reckless drunks. Destroy shit, lose clothes, drink more, party hard, spud goes on to do stupid dares that rock’s too drunk to stop him from doing, black out, wake up somewhat buzzed with their heads pounding and random tattoos they dont remember getting on them. Spud feels the headaches much later so he’s always laughing and talking about what a good time they had.

Leshawna likes to think she has high alcohol tolerance much like she likes to think she knows how to dance, i feel like her and heather would have drinking nights at clubs and leshawna would lose herself fast and become a huge giggling mess and dances much worse than she usually does but the club loves her. Constantly tells heather stuff like “yknow...u are so fuckin toxic but ur my friend....u suck but i cant hate ya...u showed ur tits to someone i liked at the time...:ur a wh*re...ur my wh*re friend...” and obviously heather being a bit buzzed finds this hilarious and tries to get leshawna to stop drinking. Calls people and says personal stuff. Can get emotional at times. Mostly just giggly, loves to dance. Calls harold constantly like “u remember back in tdi...” and harold has to drive all the way to leshawna to get her before she gets any worse or lets more stuff out. Leshawna gets hangovers bad tho so the next day she’s practically dead. I’d like to think her and gwen become roommates before gwen dates courtney in my future au so gwen’s the one caring for leshawna being like “i told u heather has no control with drinks” heather obviously calls to make sure leshawna’s alive and harold checks on her constantly.

[angeltrapz]

SAW ask time 💚 wld love to hear abt chainshipping + Adam bein autistic— maybe like what Lar notices abt Adam’s stims, things he does for him/ways he helps when Adam needs it. Also for Eric/Adam, maybe any thoughts on Eric finally like.. realizing he’s got a special interest?? ik we’ve talked abt how hard he masks but bein around Adam (n Mallick) helps him relax abt that, so like maybe how does he react + what is th special interest? anything u wanna dish abt!

thank u it’s always SAW ask time in my heart <33

!!! I was just thinkin abt tht!!! our minds 💫

I think th first time he rly sees Adam stimming (i.e. flapping his hands) he’d be like “what’s that?” but not in a rude way - genuinely a tone of “I want 2 know more abt this thing, pls tell me” rather than anything anywhere near condescending/annoyed/mean-spirited like Adam has dealt w fr YEARS at this point. so he’s definitely put on edge a lil bit bc he can’t help it, maybe he starts to like wind down and force himself into quiet hands, but Lawrence is immediately like “no I wasn’t making fun of you!! u don’t have to stop doing it!” which kinda stops Adam short like. what r we doing here. usually when ppl ask me tht they’re also telling me 2 stop. finally Lawrence says “I was just wondering what kind of stim tht was,” like he didn’t almost (accidentally) uproot Adam’s whole shit + is currently Doing So Now by using actual terms tht Adam didn’t know he knew, n so he like takes a moment to absorb tht comment n then he’s like. “oh. it means I’m happy or excited?” and honestly? when Lawrence hears tht? he’s like “oh... so then you’re rly happy? 🥺” n it’s just like. a moment fr both of them lol. (Adam feels Much safer discussing things after tht too, in several ways. it definitely helps w building trust between them!!)

after that though Lawrence definitely takes notice of more things! he’s not afraid 2 ask questions, so tht’s smth tht’s rly good fr them - Lawrence being able to seek information (he also does his own reading + research) to better understand, n not in tht shitty mommy blogger “I know yr in there somewhere” way. he doesn’t want 2 change Adam. he wants a better grasp on wht Adam’s experiences r like so he can help n minimize stress abt certain things. fr Adam tht’s definitely like.. foreign territory, bc as u’ve mentioned b4 + my personal hc as well, his parents didn’t really care 2 get him formally diagnosed + even acted like there was No Way he cld be neurodivergent in any sense, so 2 have some1 who is interested n respectful is So important 2 him. (personal hc time: I hc Adam as both adhd AND autistic like me so there’s tht!!)

so like he takes notice of th way Adam likes 2 roll things btwn his fingers (shirt sleeves, shirt hems, hoodie drawstrings, blankets, soft fabrics he likes the texture of, etc.) n is just like Oh Idea. I like 2 think he gets Adam one of those bead lanyards (like this one, which I also have!) fr him to fidget w n he kind of presents it like “I thought maybe u wld like smth like this?” n honestly he’s a lil nervous abt what Adam is going 2 say. but Adam takes it n holds it fr a minute, rolling th beads n messing w th lanyard itself 2 kind of test it, n he just looks up n smiles n he’s like “I love this. u’ve been paying tht much attention??” n fr Lawrence it’s just like “yes? of course? bc I love u?” like it’s th simplest thing in th world n Adam’s just. Huh. no he does Not tear up, if Lawrence told u tht he’s lying. he’s just Rly not used 2 ppl who want 2 know more without wanting to “get inside his head” or belittle him fr it (ties into my hc tht fr th most part, Adam hasn’t rly had any Good friends...) so it takes a lil getting used to.

another thing!! Lawrence does is ask 2 listen 2 Adam infodump abt his special interests - esp photography!! like they do this thing where if it’s not too late at night by th time Lawrence comes home frm work, Lawrence will take a quick shower n then get into his pajamas n into bed (just fr some quiet quality time b4 they go to bed, bc he still tends 2 come home a bit late), n he’ll have Adam sit next 2 him n he’ll be like “what do u want to tell me?” bc tht’s another thing tht Adam was entirely unused 2 - having ppl who didn’t just tolerate his infodumping, they wanted to hear it. Lawrence might be th first person to not actually give him shit fr it/tell him he’s being annoying/shut him down completely. again, it takes Adam a lil bit to b fully comfortable w it, but once he is he adores having tht time to be excited abt things w another person! who he knows Wants to listen!! (if we’re going th route I personally like 2 think abt sometimes too, where Lawrence is autistic as well, I feel like they infodump back n forth abt photography n medical stuff. do either of them rly know what the other is saying? not rly. are they listening happily bc that’s their partner n it’s smth they’re excited abt? oh absolutely!)

I think Adam has a tendency to eat a lot of th same foods bc they’re safe n he knows he likes them/doesn’t mind their texture (which is a big issue w trying new foods fr him), which is smth tht Lawrence also takes note of and as such, he likes 2 make sure they’re regularly stocked up on at least some of tht stuff. it’s not even smth he tells Adam he’s doing, bc it’s rly tht simple 2 him - Adam likes these things n therefore we shld have them at th house - but fr Adam it’s just One Of Those Things, y’know?? he got so much shit as a kid fr being such a “picky eater” n got shit fr it as a teenager too bc “why don’t u ever try anything new??” was smth his friends/parents Loved 2 say. it’s th fact tht Lawrence rolls w it so easily, doesn’t poke or prod for reasons he eats th way he does, and doesn’t get upset w him fr it/try 2 force him into things he isn’t comfortable w. it means a lot to him, more than he’ll ever have words 2 say (but he does always kiss Lawrence’s cheek when he gets back frm th store n he sees some of his same foods, which is just as good). it’s loving tht he’s autistic because it’s a part of him, a fact, not despite or in spite of. tht’s what’s so nice n kind of healing abt it; feeling safe 2 express yrself as u are w a partner who u know u can trust. who maybe words questions a bit funny sometimes, completely unintentionally, not out of malice (where allistic Lawrence is concerned, anyway). Adam feels Safe, n tht means a lot 2 him.

as fr ways he helps him!! a big thing is tht Lawrence is observant, esp as they spend more n more time together. a lot of th time, even when it’s just th two of them alone, Adam might have trouble maintaining eye contact fr an extended period of time, n Lawrence might not know how much it Actually helps, but he doesn’t mind tht Adam doesn’t always look at his face when they’re talking. it’s smth tht takes a little getting used 2, but he was never shitty about it w Adam. the way he sees it is if it makes Adam more comfortable, why shld he get upset abt it? it’s not like he doesn’t know when Adam’s talking 2 him anyway, or tht he can’t tell if Adam is listening; Lawrence knows both of those things, so Adam not making eye contact isn’t a problem, y’know? it’s okay. n I rly don’t know if Lawrence is fully aware of how much Adam appreciates tht.

another thing is he’s patient + understanding when Adam is nonverbal, whether it be bc he’s having a shutdown/meltdown, sensory overload, or just plain Difficulty w speech. it kinda depends on what I’m writing at th time, but I feel like Adam might have picked up at least a lil bit of sign language here n there; mostly simple phrases tht get th point across. I like 2 think Lawrence learns what they mean so he can take tht stress off of Adam’s shoulders, but most times, Adam is just comfortable sitting in silence w someone he cares abt.

OH brief thing Lawrence is RLY good at helping w pressure stims. he gives amazing bear hugs n I feel like he’d also probably let Adam lay on him if they’re on th couch/in bed. I just Feel It.

-

OHH I think abt Eric finally developing a special interest now tht he feels more comfortable w doing so a lot. honestly I kind of rly like th idea tht his special interest might be info abt rats! it kind of hits him when he catches himself writing down lil facts (tht might not even be related to pet care!) in his notebook so he’ll remember them + always being excited 2 learn more n share what he’s learned. it makes Adam SO happy to see him being comfortable w tht aspect of himself, esp now that he’s safe to explore it w ppl who understand n who won’t discourage him/belittle him for it,, Mallick too of course, but Adam knows how much Eric struggled w tht kind of thing for such a long time so he’s just. Ah. 🥺🥺

like they’ll all b chilling on th couch (Eric, Mallick, n Adam) n Eric will have his head against Adam’s shoulder while his hand is on Mallick’s chest, who has HIS head in Eric’s lap w his legs dangling off th armrest, n he’ll be like “did u know tht when rats r happy, they grind their teeth together? it’s called bruxing n then sometimes their eyes move in their sockets rly fast while they’re doing it. tht’s called boggling.” n Adam will be smiling so wide when he says he didn’t know tht but it’s rly cool!! n then Mallick will start asking questions n he n Adam just listen while Eric infodumps fr probably th very first time since he was very very young, before it was masked out of him by his parents. n he finds tht he Doesn’t feel so bad abt it anymore, not when he’s around ppl who want him to be happy and want to see him be happy - esp ppl who encourage it n let him know it isn’t smth he has to hide/keep locked away. it’s hard 2 b ashamed of himself when Adam n Mallick r looking at him w genuine interest in their eyes n so so much love.

he might still like, slip back into masking behaviour every now n then, bc it’s something he’s still dealing w n learning 2 leave behind, but after he discovers his first special interest it gets a little easier, letting go of that way of life. it was smth he was forced into by adults who didn’t actually want th best for him like they said they did when they put him through “therapy,” but w partners he knows understand n who are even autistic themselves, Eric slowly learns 2 be more comfortable w it. it’s slow, but it’s progress. bit of a learning curve. he’ll get there.

[whiterbone-a]

i wanna know what your take on the nanami / gojo relationship is ?? cause a big part of me is like nanami isn't someone who really talks , like you won't get inside of him and he'll make jokes here and there with the whole work is shit thing . but i think he lost his heart and happiness alongside yuu and i think he even said this wasn't a mission first years should be on and the fact that yuu looked up to getou and gojo so much and still got killed was like a fucking blade to the stomach.

i mean do you think there is a romantic possability , i do play around with it but at the same time do you think it would be comforting ?? like i know the big ship is gojo and getou because of how close they were but what is nanami to gojo , a tool and a function or a friend and possible lover ??? and how will his death effect him ???

also were gojo actively smiles , nanami only smiles when death is around the corner and i am like red flags here and there . but sorry this got so long and please feel free to ignore it .

hello and welcome.  take a seat and thank you for joining me.  if this doesnt make sense just pretend u know what im talking about, its the adhd for making my thoughts so scattered everywhere

so in concept the nanami and gojou ship in a romantic concept is rly cute in concept like u have an ex - salary man whos serious doesnt allow himself the luxury of acting his age but on the other end u have someone who still acts like hes a child and never takes anything serious even when hes fighting.  they both endured the trauma being a jujutsu sorcerer entails yet they have nothing in common -- gojou dresses like hes a reflection with the moon and nanami, the sun.  also the fact that gojou thinks that he, himself, is ascended above all he works with while nanami is just a human living his day to day, and lot of ppl use this as nanami to bring down gojou to his morality just like a nudge or a friendly reminder.  he even tolerates and puts up with him a lot more than he should.  hes very patient but very honest.  a lot of the fanart of them is SO CUTE esp when theyre married and living happily with one another.  i even ship them, its actually one of my top ships next to satosugu but like in reality its not so great unfortunately

honestly?  theres a small slim of a possibility but due to the nature of the clash of personalities and what their job its like ... not rly possible

nanami, even out of being a salary man, fully treats being a jujutsu sorcerer as a 9 - 5 job and refuses to work overtime. he has small luxuries like he enjoys reading and eating left overs after a day of working hard like who wouldnt and not to mention hes the type to keep his relationships strictly professional. gojou has probably asked him several times to take him out for drinks after work (altho work never ends with gojou which is ironic) and has said no.  it’s funny now that i think about it,  shouko probably asks him for an occasional drink after hours and he accepts because at least he likes shouko and he knows theres no ulterior motive from her just a couple of coworkers doing some heavy drinking but nothing ever more than that -- hes even said that he wants to get married but when hes no longer a sorcerer

sucks tho, because like everyone else, nanami sees gojou as someone who is extremely powerful and only sees him for his techniques except more like hes a nuisance and extremely annoying, even to the point of having absolutely no respect for him.  he realizes, yeah hes strong but as for the full package that is satoru gojou?  there’s absolutely nothing to respect about that man

and while we’re talking about gojou, i’ll say it, he’s mentally unstable.  i mean, we all knew that -- hes got a couple of “screws loose” as he puts it inside that rattling brain of his.  on the opposite side of the spectrum, hes not capable of handling a romantic relationship.  hes always always busy, its rare that that he gets a breather for himself.  hes always being sent out on missions out of country and ive always portrayed gojou as the type of partner thats not even gentle on his partners in terms of being playful, childish, and being a nuisance.  his mental health is absolutely terrible (i’m not saying nanamis is any better but) hes always acted much younger than what he is altho i do blame his upbringing for that.

and gojou treats everyone as good friends but does like to particularly pick on ppl who take themselves too seriously (nanami and utahime), mei mei and yuki are exempt from this.  he also doesnt rly care for ichiji but like, that doesnt matter LOL.

i do see nanami eventually giving in for one (1) after dinner ‘date’ after work but when gojou is actually less himself, hes tolerable to be around which isnt saying much tbh.  you should def listen to the nanami and gojou drama audio if u can!  they’re so fucking funny as a pair, which solidifies them as being cute but were not talking about that rn.

in terms of being ‘what are they’ to each other, its hard to tell.  i talked about it briefly as nanami reminding him of his morality and being his humility tho gojou doesnt act like it, he fully believes hes above all and everyone, lovers and close friends are included in this.  i read a lot of nana/go fanfics and they portray nanami as someone to push down his ego;  to remind him hes actually Not all that great, a child in an adults body, etc.  he’s a brutality honest man and gojou can take critic and criticisms to his person but that doesnt mean hes going to listen (and he doesnt, hes even self aware that his personality sucks ass but does he bother to change?  absolutely not and he wont start now nor for anyone else).

yuu did definitely help nanami change and shift his ideas about the world, esp hating the jujutsu society afterwards.  like, i dont blame u king, it sucks ass.  tho, i dont think nanami looked up or cared for gojou and getou that much.  getou he looked up to more so because at least hes as a respectable guy, strong, good looking, and stimulates intellectual conversations.  gojou?  not so much.  nanami probably thought that it doesnt matter if u have techniques that is extremely rare to acquire and even more so to master but u suck ass and u dont stimulate joy to be around.

nanami is a good friend and high school buddy to gojou and nanami would definitely call him ‘coworker’ or something along those lines when hes annoyed him too much or doesnt want gojou to benefit too much from simple acknowledgement.  gojou thinks hes an ascended being but he definitely respects and finds nanami to be a strong sorcerer and was rather surprised when he took the 9 - 5 job but it was definitely safer.

death ... ah, i think about this all the time.  it’s like losing suguru all again except he didnt go rogue and kill a whole village.  hes absolutely confident in nanamis abilities to fend off curses and hes too stubborn to let himself die as well, so the idea of him dying doesnt ever cross his mind.  thats a true stab to the gut to hear that nanami has died, maybe a moment of truly being unhinged and a darker nature but we wont rly know until it happens in the manga, which i cant wait.  i mean, at least mei mei, utahime, and shouko are around but this is nanami were talking about.  if this was in terms of a romantic relationship rather than a simple seemingly one - sided friendship of enjoying of being around that person but that person just tolerating him and hoping he goes away eventually.  i can’t say, i can’t say!  just take these thoughts with like a grain of salt.

also that last statement in the ask, gojous smiles are fake and a mask while the rare times nanami does smile, its genuine.

regardless of what i said, i think it can be a comfy ship!  this ship isnt toxic but any means (unless u make it toxic then well, thats a you thing) so just enjoy it!  i know i do i think as long as u recognize that maybe neither of them being a relationship would benefit the other then go stupid go crazy, i know i will.

[alukaforyou]

and ALSO sry to post bs on main im mostly just talking to myself in my personal tag half the time so yolo, no need to respond to this or reassure me or whatever but these days i licherally question how much of my - sry to sound like a broken record - bs is dépression or just my shité mentality, like i rly was not designed to last, huh? physically or mentally? lol. like who gets motion sickness on swings lmao anyways. i think i give up too easily. theres a bunch of reasons y but i dont feel like saying. its a different thing to kind of kno something, and to admit / speak it (confront it). i could psychoanalyze myself all day and tell u exactly why some things are the way they are but its too unpleasant to neatly state stuff like that u kno?? like... *i kno* but im not gonna say i kno. anywho, i digress. so i give up easily and kind of have a defeatist mentality too, its so exhausting lool. actually its weird cuz duality of man, i'll be rly determined / stubborn abt doing some stuff and not care abt fear of failure with certain things but when it comes to My Life / My Future i just think i cant rly do anything? i mean that literally like i got no skillz *laugh crying emoji* not particularly good at anything, and art - the only thing im maybe arguably ok at - i dont wanna do as a career, that is art therapy for me i dont feel like commercializing it. not interested in working in my major, maybe things wouldve been different if i went to culinary or cosmetology school?? that sounds fun. or if i majored in bio cuz i was so good at that, or even if i majored in japanese language or literature or idk. but no regrets tho cuz i learned a lot abt drawing in art school which i can use for myself. and hmm i like staying home and not rly going out of my way to meet new ppl so connections what? i h8 hearing how most opportunities come through the ppl u kno cuz its true and ik like 10 ppl tops so hm very sexi of me :^) i just feel like im p much f*cked and it rly doesnt help that i have no functional dreams, goals, or aspirations nor the confidence and drive to work towards anything so ah ok cool. u kno suga's songs "the last" and "so far away" ? that p much sums up my feels minus the part abt having to deal w fame obviously LOL. its so easy being a student (for me at least) but being a good student isnt really worth a whole lot in the """""real world""""" and the current education system doesnt even rly prepare u for reality or w.e like Deep Sigh also the political climate rly lookin like shité out there like hmmmmm do i even wanna try so hard to be here anymore tho??? also going back to the self confidence thing, ya idk her LOOOOL like it doesnt very much bother me tho? i really, honest to god have no idea what my redeeming qualities even are. being nice? and my mindset re - tolerance and compassion for others, etc, ya im rly proud of that actually but besides that i mean like what can i Do tho like hm im not particularly good at anything also im hideous like uglee but thats ok too like none of this Bothers me, thats just literally how i Am so ok fine, but i feel like it makes it hard for me to exist in the world i happen to be in??? and i realize im speaking with a huge bias here cuz my brain is totally out of whack im p sure if some1 saw me / read this they would lit be like um u literally do not have it hard girl, which is fair ur kinda right actually from an objective pov, probably? its amazing how um. hard? of a time my brain is having given my relatively ok circumstances but thats just how it is ig. and if i may quote shakespeare - o full of scorpions is my mind. and its weird cuz duality of man - i actually have a lot of good times w friends and whatever i have a lot of fun, im not even very Sad or in Agony its all very a mild? sensation? but that might be because my plan b is to simply *** so nothing rly fazes me anymore lool.

its usually a v confusing emotion, im either feeling happy, or if not that, very ???? im literally that duwang quote get a feeling so complicated its just "ajdjsjsja" idk its not overly repulsive and upsetting im like :s LOL u kno wat at this point idek what im even saying anymore but its good that im writing whatever cuz im gonna need to look back on this later and organize my thoughts for presentation cuz remember i have a s.o now???? i wanna let them kno so we r on the same page, and i dont feel like im tricking them, i thought it over more and there are like 4? major cards i wanna lay out on the table early on and they are 1. im not that close w my family emotionally so do not seek their approval or expect to deal with them much. 2. personal ideology / political views like im bi lmao and pro lgbt if that wasnt obvious also i dont rly wanna be around racists / terfs etc and if ur right wing or not on that respect women juice uhhh bye.. 3. my weak ass mentality how i might Maybe *** in the future like no promise but errrr theres one more but its a little more negotiable and also too early to discuss so i wont mention it but i already got the first two outta the way so ya. theres the most troublesome of all, #3. the last thing i wanna do is traumatize someone that loves me (and i love back) with that kinda thing, its too late for my dear friends whom i love, sorry i didnt kno i was gonna be like this LOL yall already got attached but its a little different with my s.o cuz i feel like its not too late to uh.... stop getting as attached LMAO like dam i've known my girls for almost 10 years whereas i've only known my s.o for like a month.

and this is totally not gonna come across right but if my s.o very understandably desides to dump me id be SO RELIEVED LIKE WOOOO ok cool cuz like essentially what i'd be saying is you are getting attached to someone who's future is not as stable as other people, including u. *huge exhale* from the bottom of my heart, my bad lol. and then i probs wont ever get involved w. a s.o again, sorry to reference snk in 2020 but remember how e*win smith is single cuz he doesnt kno when he will ***? big mood. i have never acted out on my interests before but i was like ok for once lets go off the shits and do smth ooc, i uh... didnt expect for it to actually go anywhere tho so now im like ???? i shouldve thought it through more tho, like i felt low key irresponsible af and selfish and dumb for getting involved w. someone even tho i Know how I Am like...... Also i just lov being single and staying home and chilling alone lmao like i seriously...... never get loney....

ok so what was i talking abt? how the passage of time makes me nervous cuz idk how i can manage to keep up w it??? how i feel like i cant do jack shit???? that life is hard???? and maybe a bih just wants to rest? permanently?????? i think the most irritating part of all for me, like what i am most mad about at myself is that i have no dream. yikes. naruto, do u think thats sad? well yoongi said its okay, and what counts is just being happy, so i will console myself and forgive her and idk just try my best for the time being??

[viclents]

me  :  comes  up  w  a  witty  intro  tagline

u  :  is  intrigued

u  :  wants  to  plot  w  me  and  my   ~ 𝖟 ó 𝖓  ~

me  :  😏😏😏

               *        chicago’s very own     ( zion kang )      has been spotted on madison avenue driving a     ( triumph bonneville t120 motorcycle )     , welcome ! your resemblance to     ( charles melton )      is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your      ( twenty-fifth ) birthday bash  . your chance of surviving new york is uncertain because you’re      ( tempestuous )    , but being     ( formidable )      might help you . i think being a     ( leo ) explains that .  3 things that would paint  a  better picture of you would be        ( the insomniac’s giveaway of dark bags beneath tired eyes ,  violently bared teeth to keep the world at a distance , all black everything . )     ( i grew up a victim and eventual perpetrator of gang violence and it was only through my sobriety and a plea arrangement that i’m staying out of prison . )       &       ( cismale  + he / him  ) +  ( toby , 18+ , she / they , pst )

                *   𝖇𝖆𝖈𝖐𝖌𝖗𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖉  

001 :  this  is  zion  !  his  mom  had  him  at  an  undetermined  young  age  and  his  dad  was  some  good  for  nothing  gang  banger  so  he  was  already  not  dealt  the  best  of  cards  :/

002 : his  maternal  grandparents  took  him  in  to  give  him  some  shot  at  having  a  normal  life  !  his  grandpa  was  ex  military  and  his  grandma  was  a  religious  fanatic  so  this  was  maybe  the  opposite  of  what  he  would  have  ended  up  w  ,  is  it  possible  to  have  TOO  structured  of  an  upbringing  ?

003 :  his  mom  would  stop  by  to  see  him  every  few  months  ,  bringing  little  treats  and  murmuring  questions  like  ‘  where  does  grandma  keep  the  jewlery  ,  z  ?  ’  in  her  sickly  sweet  voice

004 :  zion  ,  young  and  starved  for  the  affection  his  grandparents  witheld  from  him  ,  was  v  easily  manipulated  by  his  mom  :/  poor  bby

005 :   he  ended  up  having  a  LOT  of  behavioral  issues  w  his  childhood  being  kinda  shitty  n  acted  out  a  lot  in  school  !  it  got  to  a  point  where  the  school  psychiatrist  was  like  dear  god  lemme  look  @  this  kid  fr  and  diagnosed  zion  w  bipolar  disorder  and  oppositional  defiance  disorder  aka  he  was  NOT  fond  of  bein  told  what  to  do  !

006 :   he  was  p  much  NOT  abt  to  graduate  high  school  after  getting  involved  in  a  bunch  of  bad  shit  ,  drugs  ,  alcohol  ,  vandalizing  shit  ,  fights  ,  gang  activity  ,  the  whole  nine  yards  when  his  grandpa  passes  away  of  a  heart  attack  v  suddenly  .  his  gma  ,  heartbroken  and  hurt  ,  snaps  at  zion  and  tells  him  its  bc  of  all  the  shit  he  put  their  family  thru  and  that  hits  z  ,  hard

007 :  he  finds  rap  music  as  his  comfort  ,  since  his  gma  all  but  ignores  him  in  the  house  now  ,  and  starts  turning  to  art  and  music  as  his  new  outlet  for  his  energy  .  finally  APPAEARS  to  get  his  shit  together  when  he  joins  a  group  and  shoots  to  stardom  w  his  rap  group  (  vc  BROCKHAMPTON  )

 008 :  his  music  gets  him  out  of  the  slums  and  barely  through  graduation  but  he’s  still  got  a  lot  of  pent  up  anger  and  hostility  !  moves  out  of  his  grandparents  house  but  gets  sucked  into  some  gang  nonsense  from  his  past  and  nearly  ends  up  in  prison  if  it  werent  for  a  plea  deal  and  a  V  discreet  lawyer  that  kept  his  business  out  of  the  tabloids  !  

009 :  he  wants  to  keep  it  that  way  so  he  doesn’t  risk  his  past  comin  back  to  bite  him  in  the  ass  now  that  he’s  in  a  decent  place  in  his  life  ,  living  w  money  finally  and  being  in  control  of  what  he  wants  and  how  he  wants  it  !

010 :  now  is  rlly  famous  from  his  rapping  (  i’m  debating  between  a  matt  champion  or  a  joba  vc  so  cast  ur  votes  to  help  a  girl  out  pls  😤  )  and  also  has  dabbled  successfully  in  music  production  ,  which  is  his  main  focus  at  the  moment  !

               *    𝖆𝖇𝖔𝖚𝖙

001 :   personality  wise  ,  y’all  know  how  this  eboy  movement  is  kinda  taking  over  ?  

002 :  imagine  an  e-boy  that  ur  actually  AFRAID  of  n  that’s  zion  !

003 :  FORREAL  THO  the  mans  is  like  6’1  of  pure  untamed  aggression  ,  he  has  absolutely  0  filter  and  will  not  hesitate  to  make  an  enemy  of  someone  just  bc  they  looked  at  him  wrong  .  he’s  naturally  hostile  and  has  a  resting  bitch  face  but  that’s  just  to  warn  u  of  the  broody  angry  boy  that  the  face  belongs  to  !

004 :  he  gives  ZERO  shits  abt  how  he’s  perceived  bc  he  knows  he’s  talented  and  has  worked  for  the  fame  he  has  and  cherishes  now  .  he  doesn’t  take  critiques  well  n  has  a  naturally  aggressive  /  sarcastic  disposition  that  makes  him  ,  quite  frankly  ,  an  asshole  !  

005 :   unpredictable  temper  ,  seriously  effin  volatile  n  ready  to  SWING  when  needed  ,  honestly  probably  only  has  a  circle  of  like  2  ppl  bc  most  ppl  don’t  tolerate  his  broody  aggressive  antics  long  enough  to  get  to  his  slightly  softer  side  

006 :    if  u  can  brave  the  aggression  and  the  temper  ,  u  see  a  deeply  creative  and  considerate  individual  who  would  give  the  clothes  off  his  back  for  the  ppl  he  cares  abt  .  nobody  would  believe  he  has  something  even  RESEMBLING  a  soft  side  bc  he’s  so  gd  ANGRY  most  of  the  time  but  any  of  his  exes  or  best  friends  can  attest  to  the  big  bad  wolf  having  a  gentle  caring  side  !

007 :  he’s  intense  n  deeply  passionate  and  as  long  as  u  stay  in  ur  lane  he’ll  stay  in  his  ,  he’s  p  professional  and  has  a  v  composed  aesthetic  bc  he’s  v  particular  about  himself  n  his   #Brand

00?  :    quick  hc’s  :  he’s  left  handed  ,  if  he  wasnt  a  musician  he’d  be  a  tattoo  artist  ,  u  will  NEVER  catch  him  wearing  any  shade  of  not-black  in  his  official  public  appearances  ,  has  a  lowkey  stupid  sense  of  humor  despite  being  so  gd  SERIOUS  all  the  time  ,  n  he’s  living  straight  edge  besides  the  constant  cigarettes  he’s  puffin  on  even  tho  he  still  raps  abt  drugs  n  shit  !

[kosmicdream]

Long time reader, first time questioner. What type of life did Knife, Spoon, and for the last chunk of it Fork have together on the more civilian end of things? Like, did they have a house, apartment, move around a lot, was the money from agenting enough to make them rich or just middle class, who bought the groceries, etc. Thanks!

Oh my GOD thank you i absolutely adore this kind of question because i maladaptively daydream the mundane life of my fav cutlery trio on a daily basis so this gives me an outlet.

As far as the living situation it went a bit like this. Knife has an apartment on thumb HQ, I’d say he’s been living in that building for hundreds of years as its one of the oldest buildings on that moon. He used to jsut go where he pleased but he’d eventually start to gather his crap there and eventually it ended up being where he lived. Originally that building was not even made to be an apartment but as the population grew (and also because he was living there) it was remodeled and the area around it also became more of a city.

Spoon first lived in the same building but a diff floor when he was first starting being an agent, but eventually Knife invited him to room with him and this was when Knife finally put the moves on Spoon which was funny bc at that point Spoon had resigned to just being Totally in love with knife but never having those feelings resupricated.

As spoon lived with knife he noticed how badly knife took care of himself and the apartment and started to get very Domestic and learned how to cook for him. Id say he did a lot of the groceries but eventually he was comfortable enough with making knife do it with a shopping list or going out together ofc. but knife at first was kind of a chronic shoplifter bc he just kind of would put things in his pockets and forget that things, ALL THINGS IN THE STORE, must be paid for. money has always been kind of a ????? whatever concept to knife but spoon has always taken money matters very seriously which u wouldnt expect by how much he spends. (at least he has taken it seriously once he became an agent and was like.. earning HIS money from what he was DOING vrs hiding under a fake alias or whatever. once he was making it himself thru his actual job he worked hard at doing, it became something he valued.)

Knife appears to not get paid very much as he doesnt want many things and sort of just takes what he needs at times, since no one can really stop him. But he is actually incredibly wealthy. He knows money is a tool to humans but he also knows its important to make sure no one knows how much you have really, since that makes it easier to be stolen if they do know. So he acts like he doesnt care about it and doesn’t have much at all. If he decides to flex it its for very rare occasions or when hes accidentally destroyed simons car for the 50th time and has to pay for repairs or simons going to cut his favorite coat up for REAL THIS TIME IM WARNING YOU

After simon was kicked out, Knife and Fork lived together for quite a long time until fork grew up and realized that bringing dates over kind of didnt work out well with knife around. Knife kills all moods. especially when its his son’s date. he literally will not tolerate any of that shit under his roof. So fork moved into a new building so they could have some space, they still lived close by however. To this day Fork still lives there.

Simon moved into a new apartment when he got kicked out and it was like incredibly lavish and huge so he could host giant parties at and pretend he wasnt sulking over not being at Knifes anymore. He later blew up that entire building (lol) and now he lives in the same building Fork does now and has resided there to this day.

So i guess they didnt really move around a lot, although for spoiler reasons i cant discuss the sort of secret honeymoon spot that simon and knife also lived at when they had secret romantic vacations. Knife also has a spaceship that he, spoon and fork have all spent time living in off and on, which appears in chapter 8 during the flashback scene. When he “died” kurt legally inherited it. its basically like a flying apartment. Knife personally finds woodsy areas uncomfortable and so he feels much more happy near cement and buildings so thats why he doesnt like, own a cabin. Beaches are cool tho.

Oh right when fork and knife lived together theyd play rock paper scissors (ha) to decide who would go grocery shopping bc they both hated doing it and then would just order take out for a week. knife was very good at taking care of kurt when he was a kid but as soon as they both became adults they just became true slobs and knife couldnt really keep up the ‘cleaning the house and taking care of chores’ parent thing anymore.

when fork lived on his own he realized his dates judged that all he had was ketchup packets in his fridge so he started to work on being better at that stuff.

knife’s apartment was incredibly flithy when he lived alone with both fork and simon moved out, and wouldnt let anyone visit which made fork concerned. when it was discovered that knife died and ppl went into his apartment, they found it was covered in discarded skins. like. knife’s bad habit for hygiene is to just cut off his skin instead of showering and regrowing it so when he was left alone in his bad depression he just did that constantly so it was probably pretty disturbing to see the floors cluttered with his shedded skin like he was a snake LOL

anyway the three of them are rich. simon is the only one who really tried to ~act~ super rich tho and do like.. flaunt his richness by having..  parties on a yacht thing. (when he was single and no longer valued all his hard earned money lol BURN IT ALL AWAY HUH SIMON) then when he exploded he had to pay so much fucking property damage and medical bills so he really lost like. everything. HAPPY NOTE TO END THIS ASK ON YAYYYYYYYY 

[astereaholloway]

- ̗̀ * ( sophie turner + cisfemale + she/her ) have you seen ( aster holloway ) walking around campus ? they are a ( twenty-one ) year old, studying ( botany + entomology ). we hear they are in ( theta sigma eta ), and can be ( opinionated & daunting ), maybe it’s because they are an ( aries ). they sort of remind us of ( abandoned greenhouses, spinning bike wheels , iridescent pocket knives ), maybe we can find out more ! *  ̖́-  + habitat

i yeet’d holliday for this child o’ mine pls love her bc i love her sm i’ll prolly change her fc to sophie turner as soon as i get tired of cropping gifs of saoirse but enjoy her face for now sksksk. like this n i’ll come to u!!

tw: fire, death, cancer, etc. etc.

gen. info

full name: aster holloway

nickname(s): n/a, give her one n she’ll cut you probably

b.o.d. - april 1st.

label(s): the hellcat, the minefield, the connard, etc. etc.

height: probably like 5′7″ or 5′8″ tbh

hometown: inglewood, california

sexuality: chaotic. lesbian.

bio. info

hasn’t had the most......stable, life

born to dahlia verbeck, a botanist, wildlife conservationist, and volunteer firefighter whose presence was very well known in south california’s environmental scene

to keep a long story short, she married maverick holloway; a sleazy low-rank cop with a smoking problem and an obnoxious personality when she was 19. he was nearly twice her age. nobody knows why she married him, or why she tolerated him

the relationship was by no means abusive, but it was lackluster

this led to dahlia having a one night stand, and baba boom baba bing, aster was conceived

 the only one who knew that the child wasn’t maverick’s was dahlia’s twin brother, donovan, whose career was p much the exact same as dahlia’s

they were basically both mad scientists; when dahlia started slacking because of her pregnancy, donovan would kick it up

like ykno the twin scientists in bioshock infinite ?? that them like they were eerily alike, always finishing each other’s sentences. nightmare fuel.

the only difference was that donovan was considerably less intense than dahlia b/c dahlia was the kinda lass who would set fire to your car

anywAYs so aster was born and everything was fine n dandy until she got a lil older and it suddenly became clear that this child was absolutely not maverick’s at all because they looked. nothing alike. like u know when u can just tell ?? yeah. yeah u could tell

maverick left dahlia afterwards and it was essentially up to her to raise aster alone. donovan had his own wife and kid to take care of and sort of backed down from his career to do so. house dads ftw

aster grew up knowing her dad as some ‘deadbeat no good’ simply bc dahlia was bitter

also grew up as the kid who would hold worms over another kid’s face and taunt them w/ it. so like, playground bully. that was aster. she’s not ashamed of it

she was often left on her own to do her own kinda shit b/c her mom was always busy out in nature n’ shit but aster never minded; loved her mom a Lot

aster’s life changed when she was nine

her mother had been doing research out in the ~wilderness~ with donovan, after months of convincing him of doing this one last project with her~ when the wildfires started

it spread so fast, and they were already too far away from the road

it took them two months to confirm that the twins were dead

rather than leave aster to maverick, elaine--donovan’s wife--took her under her wing and moved across the country to boston alongside myra, her daughter

elaine always held a resentment towards aster because of her mother, but never did anything about it--it was just always, sorta, implied ?

but myra and aster got along swimmingly despite being polar opposites

aster was p much a feral child, and myra had been receiving etiquette lessons since birth, practically--like, literally

elaine put them in the same hobbies but aster always found ways to be wildly different from the ~standard~

myra learned cello and flute, aster started up on bass and drums (breaking both instruments, repeatedly, for many years)

elaine forced dance onto the both of them, and whilst they both excelled at ballet--aster switched over to a more free-flowing dance as soon as she was able to

(that and when elaine tried to put aster in sports instead of dance--figuring her fiery nature would be put to good use--aster managed to get kicked off of every single team of every single sport she tried b/c of her aggression. theyve had to fight a few lawsuits after aster’s broken a number of noses and sporting equipments)

myra was learning two languages, aster? dyslexic and could barely read english as it was; science made sense to her, however. plants? especially.

people confused myra and aster for twins nearly all the damn time, despite only being cousins, they were so alike and yet so opposite

that was, of course, until they got into a nasty spat when they were seventeen

it was something about dead parents and resentments and yadda yadda; it didn’t end well

aster wound up running away......all the way back to los angeles.

n i mean like......homegirl literally managed to run away across the gd country w/o getting caught or murdered

by the time she arrived in los angeles her aunt was sort of like ‘fuck it ur almost 18′ b/c....aster was nearly 18 by the time she arrived in the city, and elaine contacted maverick who in which found aster

aster did not want to go with him, after hearing stories about him just being no-good

but at that point, maverick was one of los angeles’ head detectives with a beautiful apartment and a beautiful wife and a beautiful dog and just kind of living his best life ?? after dahlia’s death he had really cleaned himself up y’kno

aster still kind of resented him but that was more of an inner thing

anyways she started attending ucla b/c her mother attended ucla, but her mother wasn’t a part of a sorority

it was one of those spur of the moment decisions and like nobody knows how aster ended up in theta sigma eta b/c she’s like a grumpy grandmother

but like she dun’ did that

we stan

a year ago maverick was diagnosed w cancer and has been in the hospital battling it ever since, aster is admittedly effected by it but like would never tell anybody ever

she doesn’t really tell anybody anything about her life, like, it’s a gd mystery

uuuuuuuuh aster works in a floral shop as a florist and grows her own shit ranging from fruits, vegetables, weed, shrooms, uh opium poppies yeah she Does that

it’s organic n fresh n shit like the devil works hard but aster works harder

she doesn’t really ~sell~ too often b/c she’s kinda selfish w her stash but it’s some top notch shit when she does 

no she doesn’t grow in the floral shop she’s not Stupid

aster inherited some of her mother’s properties Out There so she drives up almost everyday to take care of her plants

uuuhh fun fact, aster’s part of a dance like...company, kind of? but not really ? outside of ucla b/c she hates being involved in school shit besides habitat for humanity

personality

v v v harsh tbh

she won’t beat around the bush, usually...brutally honest, tbh?

like lbr she’s kind of a bitch too

just v offputting at first b/c she tells it like how it is n doesn’t rly care abt ur problems

doesn’t go around lookin’ for new friends but if you’re tight w her then she’ll probably die for u like she’s v loyal

but if u wrong her like even once she’ll drop u and treat u like right shit

she either feels intensely or nothing at all n that���s like. smth u have to deal w/

she’s v v v chaotic neutral, bordering evil--really works in her own favors

became a botanist after her mother bc she admired her mother more than anybody else

not saying that being vegan is a personality trait

but

aster’s a vegan

n just super hardcore into saving the earth n shit?

litter and she’ll break ur nose, basically

v into sustainable living n shit. rides her bicycle everywhere if she can, rly rarely drives, doesn’t do fast fashion at ALL

v v passionate, will argue w/ u until u admit she’s right even if she’s painfully wrong

like super stubborn, v opinionated, assumes the worst of u immediately

a lil cynical, but is more realist than pessimist

BIG FUCKING GAY

like so gay

she’s not Out-Out but she definitely doesn’t hide it, just doesn’t think it’s necessary to be like ‘im gay’ every 5 minutes n doesn’t think it’s necessary to let ppl kno she’s gay b/c shes just like....its my business

kinda bitch to flirt w dudes for fun in order to lead them on, get them to do things for her, etc. etc. just to disappoint in the end

this is big dumbass energy b/c that’s how u get stabbed

unless aster stabs u first

kinda gal who’ll key ur car if u piss her off during a class debate, but will also stick thumb tacks into ur wheels n shit too

like.....i said she’s spiteful, right? b/c she can b so spiteful

really, genuinely, has no regard for other ppl’s feelings

her music taste is either heavy rock or straight up like grimes/die antwoord there is no in between (prolly listens to billie eilish tho)

owns a pet tarantula n yes she has it in her dorm n Yes she brings it out n plays w it n shit her name is stevie nicks n u better respect her

big slut

would never cheat on u but also probably wouldn’t date u in the first place bc she’s scared of like....being in a relationship b/c all of hers are p much on the rocks

probably carries around a pocket knife at all times

probably bought said pocket knife from a dude in an alleyway for like $5 

myra also goes to ucla and theyre 100% still not speaking but that’s bc they’re both too stubborn to go to each other but like lbr aster misses her cousin

v unruly, nvr brushes her hair, usually got dirt on her clothes bc she’s prolly been digging in gardens or stealing flowers or some shit

bright side is tht she always smells like flowers

theta sigma eta is lucky b/c she cooks her own meals w her own fresh veggies n shit n she always makes too much food n like ? so good

but anyways she’s also got like no manners okay she’s so impolite

uuuuuuh god i dunno what else

wanted connections

ride or die

other friends of varying closeness

ex-friends ???

...like somebody she’s into but also...not into? v conflicted feelings

on-and-off-agains bc their relationship is awful n probably toxic but it just. hurt so good

ex-gfs

ex-hookups

boys she’s led on

boys she’s currently leading on

flirtatious encounter gone wrong [not clickbait] ??

enemies

enemies but gone sexual [not clickbait]

buyers of her products - either weed, shrooms, or opium teehee

roommate

give her somebody she was a uwu soft crush on but would nvr do anything abt bc gross romance !!

alternately, unrequited crushes of any sorts

fellow gays b/c gays always end up knowing each other

party pals

frenemies ??

sdfgh give me her dad’s trophy wife pleathe....it’d be so funny

childhood friends tht knew her b4 she moved to boston so like...ages 0-9

childhood friends tht knew her after she moved to boston so like...ages 9-17

or acquaintances bc she was....a mean one

A TUTOR just b/c she can rly struggle w her dyslexia

[frdknsll-blog]

imagine the most serious character you know

now imagine them getting scared by the toaster going off as they walk by

⋆ ◦ ° ☾ joel kinnaman + male + he/his — have you met ford kinsella? they are thirty eight years old known around town as the bodyguard. they’ve been in the gang life for fifteen years, and currently work for the gang as a soldier. they are a pansexual virgo, which means they are practical + observant, as well as harsh + inflexible. rusty metal crow bar, beech forest in the winter, messages on read.

BIO:

born in valdez. his crackhead mom named him ford because she found him in the boot of a ford fiesta whilst she was robbing it. he was a one way ticket to claim some golden benefits.

had a string of men come in and out of their home like a revolving door who were just as bad as her or worse. ford was still protective of his mum, despite all her shit, and he paid for it.

grew up in a lil trailer park in some dodgy area. a real small community. guy ritchie snatch vibes. he heard stories of kids at school playing ball in the garden but the kids from the trailers fought each other for fun.

he only knew the difference bc he actually went to school. occasionally. he enjoyed learning and thought he’d be able to get on the right path. rip. kept to himself at school, quiet. never threw the first punch but his first was always the last.

the community attempted to overthrow the ‘monsters’ that controlled valdez. stupid.

resulted in one big throw down betw the two groups on ford’s home ground. by the time the caito’s gang were finished - mind you it didn’t take them long - the majority of the ppl ford grew up with were either dead, in the back of police cars, or on the run...

at the age of nineteen, he was thrown into jail. had already gone to juvie a few times. after he’d established his reputation as someone that didn’t like being started on bc it meant he had to finish them? it wasn’t too bad. he got to read, smoke, and read more.

one night, he’d saved the life of a guy who’d been cornered by some inmates. turns out he was the son of a guy pretty high up in the gang. he offered a ‘get out of prison’ card to ford but he declined. the outside world didn’t appeal to him.

until news reached him that the gang had found his girlfriend. immediately he asked to be let out. it took a while but by the time he got out things weren’t how he expected.

she was too far gone. a splitting image of his mother. when he found out that they had a kid, and that the kid was no where to be found, he thought it’d be the end of their relationship. but he couldn’t bring himself to give up on her.

she was a hooker and he’d spent his days trying to protect her, save her from herself. until one day it all got too much and he drove himself mad. a customer laid hands on her and ford murdered him.

caito and his gang came to ford’s protection. but everything came at a price. he began working for the gang officially and it only felt natural to do so - he couldn’t find a job anywhere else, and since his release he’d been doing small jobs to get by here and there.

she died from an overdose not long after. we don’t talk about it.

now he mostly works as a guard to the escorts/strippers. and the odd job here and there during the day. he prefers working on his own.

PERSONALITY:

he’s not angry. or sad. or anything. he’s just tired and pretty over it.

not a man of many words. talks with his eyes and incoherent grumbles: stop talking, step away, can you pass me the salt, this coffee is too hot, do you want my jacket, are you okay...

one cool, calm, collected, callous, cold c*nt. all the c’s. oh and a clean freak.

doesn’t get drunk, doesn’t do drugs. what a bore. v strict with himself. has a set of rules and sticks to them, expects others to do the same or at least respect them.

v patient but has zero tolerance. no manners, raised by rabid dogs lbr.

has a 2g phone. seriously a granddad. likes quiet, peace, serenity. wants to get things done as quickly and as cleanly as possible. doesn’t actually like having to resort to violence but it’s rly the only thing he knows.

likes wood carving. has a collection of ornaments he’d carved. honestly would probably even like knitting if he’d give it a chance tbh.

has just learned to detach himself from everything. lowkey dissociating half the time. honestly has no sense of humour.

super private. u aint gettin anything out from him about his past or personal life. loljk he has no personal life.

POTENTIAL PLOTS:

he doesn’t rly have friends. ppl he’s used to maybe. ppl who understands he likes his space and the way he works. fellow soldiers that just like to get the job done? not sure how long that’ll last bc we lov begrudging friendships in this house.

pls gimme ppl that will annoy the heck out of him. leon and matilda vibes. he’s a baby sitter lbr.  

he ain’t no ho but he still got needs. one night stands onli. feel like he used 2 fuck ppl in the gang but has made a rule not to anymore cos he cbf for messiness. (we’ll see)

someone that is able to get him to him maybe? bring out the fire in him, make him lose his shit bc when he does he loses his control. and he likes being in control of himself. hence no drinking 2 much.

enemies - anyone who’s a bit psycho and trigger happy, he ain’t gonna get on with u. i feel like he’s sent on jobs to keep them lot in check. 

someone that can actually get him to talk? they could have nice simple random conversations about absolutely nothing but will take a certain character (iono what that is yet pls i’m useless)

if you’ve made it this far then i’m sorry. it’s obvious i just have no idea whAT IM DOIN AND IONO Y U CARRY ON WIT THIS MESS OF A RAMBLE.

if u wanna plot like this post and i’ll message u :D or if u wanna message me first that’s grand too >:))))

[steponmepinkjun]

ok replying to the last ask from the shortie convo: i have decided that the issue isn’t my unintimidating appearance nor any lack of badassery in my chart, i simply need to start snapping on bitches. no more making excuses just committing a straight up murder, verbally, or maybe i’ll just start swinging. who knows. i Could be giving off that energy you describing but i’m clearly not so it’s probably just that i’ve been holding myself back. fuck that, it’s been too chummy over here i’m gonna start summoning demons n shit. haunting people via the astral plane. going to their house and moving all their furniture an inch to the left so they bump into everything. swapping their lube and laundry detergent. stealing peoples bank account numbers. selling their organs online. fucking their mans. nt’s who wanna try me aboutta catch these HANDS! YALL WANTED TO SEE A SCORPIO YALL GON GET STUNG BITCHES

i’m definitely taking this ego boost and running w it tho. ur right tho us scorpios go hard. in theory i’m like “yeah i’m a p selfish person i always put myself over everyone else even those i care about” when in reality if someone even Breathes incorrectly at any of my like 4.5 people i’ve decided are My People they aboutta feel the wrath of a GOD. i just been cast away too many times to put in that energy for most people tbh it’s hard bc i’m an extrovert snd i Want lots of friends but i’m picky w em. if i find them boring they’re getting left on read. if their sense of humour doesn’t bounce off mine like a motherfucking bouncy castle that you can safely do a triple backflip on, i’m not having it. if they can’t take my roasts with their head held high they ain’t lasting long. this criteria narrows it down to just abt everyone who don’t want me, apparently, and some randos on the internet. LMFAO. then again i’ve had people i just thought were ok and not fun enough to stick around for, be the ones reaching out to me n put the effort in to be my friend and i just 🥺🥴🤩🥺🥺 i’m gonna roast them shitless but if anyone else says so much as a single hair on their head being off i am annihilating their entire bloodline down to the 9th generation. you best not go around telling ppl how soft we are on the inside tho hoe i do Not strap a switchblade to my thigh for people to find out about my romanticism or how i daydream abt just hanging out w my best friends n doing The most domestic and normal things just bc i want to spend more time w them, no, shhh. keep it on the down low. also aquarians tend to scare me in terms of genuine friendships bc y’all so flaky like aquas would tell me “i love u so much ur like my favourite person ever” then ghost my entire existence until i ask them for a tbh on their insta story and turns out they thought i was too much and their friends all hate me, like, i love yalls sense of humour but OUCH. u may projectile vomit at ur taurus moon but that’s like Exactly what u need to balance that shit out cause taurians to be ride or die. like yeah they’re arguably “lazy” by generalisation but that’s just bc their motivation is Extremely tunnel visioned towards whatever makes them happy and if that’s you you’re getting Showered in love n affection and attention and yall stubborn as a brick wall but loyal to a fault. us scorpios need thst shit bro we need that Stability taurians provide, esp since they’re so sturdy they tend to be able to handle our intensity well without being scared off. no taurus slander in this household will be tolerated unless it’s from me 😤😤😤 -felix bi anon

I'm tellliiiing you, you need to start smackin bitches. Cause I've met baby scorps that don't realize they literally are The Babe With The Power, and then full scorps who know that smackin tf out of someone is ONLY A PROBLEM to bitches who know they do shit they deserve to get slapped for 😂

I'm always honestly confused when people say Aquarians are cold or detached or unemotional ☹️because I genuinely don't get it 😭 like, we are some of the most emotional people on fuckin planet earth, to our own detriment—I think we just have an ego problem and we also tend to be extremely contrarian, so whenever someone thinks they know us or what we're about, we pull the rip cord because no one could EVAAAAA, and it's insulting that they think they could 😂 But I've always known Aquarians to be some of the most sensitive bitches, we just don't externalize it because our world is internal, we don't share w the world, we create our own. We are flakier than a fresh baked fuckin Popeyes biscuit tho, that is the gods honest truth. We will decide on the drive to ur place that we're no longer invested and just up and turn around and go back to bed without a word. I think what the outside world intercepts as being cold or aloof in Aquarians is actually just the fact that we really struggle with Casualness and take everything WAY too seriously and are extremely idealistic, and we're so used to being made fun of for being too serious or too passionate that we just like. Stop showing up mentally to a lot of spaces. Especially if what we're excited about is something other people find weird, we jsut go "okay I won't share joy with you anymore cause you're a bitch." I've also never known another Aquarian who doesn't feel an extremely strong sense of intuition, coupled with a really black and white thinking, that makes us quickly gauge how compatible someone's values etc are with ours and if we have an inkling it's not gonna work, we just dip. I'm totally guilty of thinking someone is my kindred spirit and then they say one thing that makes me feel differently and I just cut ties, cause I know that they won't change and I can't abide by our differences, so it feels like an insurmountable problem and we just shut it down and move on. We think too much about shit lmfao. My problem with Taurians has always been that, in my experience, they have this deep emotional capacity because they think of their life through the lense of classic film, so being the hopelessly devoted friend or the lovestruck ingenue is appealing to them for that reason, so they can picture their actions from a 3rd person pov and feel that the audience will react positively to their character. To people/signs that are internally motivated rather than externally, that can read as not being genuine, and that's been my large experience with taurus. I don't hate Taurians, I have a lot of them in my life, but the Taurus in my chart only exacerbates the natural dramatic nature i have and makes me unbearable a lot of the time lmfao. I'm idealistic enough as it is, my moon in taurus just makes me INSANELY emotional about romance and friendships to a degree that keeps me from having them because I NEED it to be storybook, it has to be perfect or I can't handle it. I'd sum up the taurus/Aquarius dynamic as us feeling uneasy about them because they're very driven, but we feel it's for the wrong reasons, if that makes sense.

[losvcr]

mike hanlon as a poc

a/n: okay so, as a black female, i really wanted to add on some headcanons for mike as the only black male and poc in the losers club. i know he’s a human guy just like anyone else, but african americans have culture too so hope this doesn’t offend anyone! i think most of the headcanons can overlap but if i’m talking specifically abt book/movie mike or a modern day mike i’ll clarify. i haven’t read the book yet so if smth is wrong sorry!

sunday dinners were always a thing for the hanlons. i haven’t read the book but it seemed like mike was close to his parents from what i’m getting

one time mike invited all the losers over for sunday dinner and they got to taste soul food for the first time

mike’s mom made a huge feast for the losers and even made them plates to go home so their parents could try it, etc.

richie is the loser who tends to come over a lot for sunday dinners after that bc u kno.. his fam sucks. and the hanlons welcome him w/ open arms

personally i imagine mike to have the most diverse music taste

he liked rock n roll just like the other losers (and punk rock n the 80s)

when he’s with his fam there’s a lot of smooth jazz going on but also a lot of r&b

the jackson 5 and michael jackson was a household staple

there was a lot of motown too

and i think who he talked abt that the most with was ben because ben also has a very diverse music taste. whenever a motown record came out ben would just rush over to mike’s and is like ‘let’s play this smokey robinson song 12 times’

in modern day he would listen to a lot of soft rock but also a lot of r&b/hip-hop too. lauryn hill is his hero and he argues that her album is the best hip hop album to date

as much as his parents love the other losers and the fact that they took him in as a friend, they tell him to be careful

bc he’s the only poc and they can get away with stuff that he wouldn’t be able to get away with

but in all honesty mike wouldn’t be super worried bc he knows that his friends got his back. shit, they saved him from bowers when they didn’t have to

i think mike relates with bev the most tbh.

when they’re out together i think mike and bev gets the most shit from other people bc of their race and gender, and they just kinda hold hands and collectively tell said ppl to fuck off (hahaha and then eddie comes in with some choice words and mike just finds it amazing bc eddie rlly won’t tolerate that kinda hate)

when mike develops feelings for bill and stan, and vice versa, he’s incredibly scared to tell his parents that they’re his new boyfriends

bc in a lot of black families homophobia is rampant and he already knows that his race + his sexuality is a bad combination

but stan and bill are so patient with him and give him cuddles and kisses and tells him to only say something when he’s ready and that they’ll be there with him if he wants them to

when he does tell his parents it’s not looking good at first. his mom cries and his dad has some denial over the whole thing

and it makes mike so sad that he cries when he’s alone with the losers (and they comfort him ofc bc they all fucking love mike with their whole hearts (esp his boyfriends))

but eventually his parents come around because they love him and want him to be happy!!

they just, ofc, tell him to be careful

i felt like i had a thousand more but i’ll add when they come back. FEEL FREE TO ADD TO THIS THIS IS IMPORTANT.