#or that nobody trusted him with that much power
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gay-dorito-dust · 1 day ago
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Jason will forever be my comfort character, forever and always
Jason knew from an early age that love was conditional. This was especially more so if you lived in Gotham, and if that was the case then love was more or less something that’s purely transactional. The moment you lose the ability to give anything to someone else, you’re more then likely left to die in an alleyway or in a far away abandoned warehouse that was rigged to blow up.
Love was a weapon utilised in every possible way then what it was meant to be used for, and so Jason didn’t grow up with a very good experience with love or what others claimed as love.
Yet he read books where love was pure, love was powerful and empowering to the people who had the chance to experience it, love was scary and brutal as it was beautiful and something everyone desires to have in their life; whether or not it was real for everyone will chase after it blindly and carelessly as though their self worth was dependent on such an emotion.
He’s read books where love could break someone so badly that they can’t get up, where love can cause more cuts and wounds than knives and other weapons could ever inflict. He’s read books where love has left people wonder their self worth and if anyone else could love them as deeply and truly as the person who had just walked out of the door.
However Jason wondered that if people did love that deeply, wouldn’t you want to stay with that person even through the toughest times of their lives? Help them pull through instead of abandoning them when they were in the most need of their life? To Jason that didn’t sound like love at all as he couldn’t help but see himself in these characters that only saw the worst in themselves, truly believing that love wasn’t for them nor ever will in how their entire lives was the biggest example of such.
However all that changed with time the moment you entered his life and for good.
Jason was on the defensive as his eyes wouldn’t leave you as all you did was simple things for him unprovoked, unwarranted, as though you wanted to do these things for him. You would care for his books as though they were irreplaceable while rearranging them in alphabetical order, clean his weaponry and armour before he could early in the morning, and even would him breakfast in the morning when you noticed that he didn’t eat nearly as much as he should to properly function.
Jason didn’t know how to feel, nor how he could repay you back in response and even when he did, you would just brush him off and tell him that you could handle it, telling him that he shouldn’t worry about doing anything for you purely because you did things for him one day.
‘I just wanted to do these things for you.’ You tell him with a smile. ‘You’re a busy man and you don’t have nearly enough time to catch up to everything and I merely wanted to help clear your schedule somewhat while you’ve got your hand full.’ You add and Jason could only stare at you.
‘You wanted to?’ He said with a raised brow. ‘Sweetheart, there’s no such thing as people doing things for others out of the kindness of their heart, everyone wants something in the end as nobody is above their own desires.’ He then crossed his arms over his chest as a look of unconvincing overcame his face at your words.
You frown at this but didn’t hold such views against him, Gotham wasn’t a city where love was genuine and not corrupt nor unhealthy to some extent, if anything your heart ached for him as you could only imagine a young Jason having to learn this cruel lesson in the worst possible way; one that left a permeant scar upon his heart that would ache painfully as a reminder that in a city of Gotham love didn’t exist unless it was for transactional or conventional purposes for even more corrupt figureheads.
‘Love shouldn’t be used to hurt people, it should be used to help people and allow them to gain the strength to let others into their heart and trusting that person to not stab them in the back, love should be used between friends, family and lovers and no one else who could corrupt an innocent emotion such as love.’ You stepped closer to him as you watched his eyes and the flickering of emotions within them as his jaw clench and he would straighten his posture as though he was trying to scare you off with his height, it wasn’t working.
‘Love should help you realise that the love you’ve been receiving is not love at all, Jason you deserve love much like everyone else, for someone will look at you and see a beautiful man with scars that tell stories that they can only hope you’ll be ready to share with one day at your own comfortability.’ You finished as you rested your hand upon his bicep, feeling the muscles tense beneath your touch, as your thumb caresses a faint scar of his. It wasn’t a touch tender as anything Jason had experienced before and it both frightened and intrigued him at how much he needed this.
Had he found the love that the books he’s read in the past promised? That child in him said yes with such an eagerness, but he was still uncertain but knew that he felt safer with you than he did anyone else, and that was certainly a start in his eyes.
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mscresta · 2 days ago
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Finnick x tribute reader?
First meeting.
Finnick x reader.
Sfw !
Cw// Reaping, mention of death, panic attacks, comfort, social anxiety.
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As soon as you heard your name called at the reaping, everything started to blur. Your old life—your parents, your friends—faded into the background. The second your name was spoken, it no longer felt like it belonged to you.
On the train, you stared out the window, barely registering the scenery rushing by. You didn’t bother talking to the other tribute; the idea of forming any connection only added to the already unbearable weight in your chest.
You didn’t even notice your mentor enter the room until he sat down in front of you. “Hello there,” he said with a smile, as if this was all completely normal—as if, in just a few weeks, you wouldn’t be fighting for your life in an arena designed to kill you.
You were too nervous to respond. Your throat felt tight, and a heavy pressure pressed against your chest. It was like you were teetering on the edge of a panic attack. The walls of the train car felt closer with every passing second, and you couldn’t stop fidgeting or catch your breath.
“Breathe.” His voice cut through the haze, steady and calm. He placed a hand on your shoulder, grounding you. It was clear he’d seen this before—panic, fear, helplessness. “You’re safe right now. I promise you, by the time I’m done training you, you won’t have a single doubt in your mind that you can win.”
His words were soothing, but it wasn’t until you forced yourself to meet his gaze that something clicked. This was Finnick Odair. The man whose name was whispered like legend in District 4, the youngest victor in history.
Your stomach tightened, and your nerves surged again. What could you possibly say to someone like him?
“I-I don’t think I can do this,” you finally managed to whisper, your voice barely audible over the hum of the train. “I’m not like you. I’m not… strong.”
Finnick leaned back, crossing his arms, his expression softening as he studied you. “Nobody thinks they’re strong when they start this. I didn’t either.” His voice lowered, almost conspiratorial, as though sharing a secret. “But strength isn’t just about muscles or weapons. It’s up here.” He tapped his temple. “Survival is about your mind, your instincts. And trust me, you’ve got more of that than you think.”
You wanted to believe him, but the lump in your throat remained. “How do you know?” you asked, your voice shaking.
“Because I’ve been where you are,” he said simply. “And I came out the other side.”
For a moment, the weight of his words silenced the storm in your mind. Finnick Odair had been you once—terrified, uncertain, thrown into a nightmare. And yet, he had survived.
“Here,” he said, pulling a small wooden trinket from his pocket. It looked like a tiny carved fish, smooth from years of handling. “This was given to me when I was in your shoes. It doesn’t have any magic powers, but it reminded me that someone believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself.” He handed it to you, his smile soft but earnest. “Keep it. You’ll need reminders of home.”
You took it hesitantly, running your thumb over its smooth surface. It wasn’t much, but somehow, it made the panic ebb just a little. For the first time since the reaping, you felt the smallest glimmer of something you hadn’t dared to hope for—hope. You turned the small carved fish over in your hand, feeling its smooth edges, the tiny grooves where someone had painstakingly etched out its details. It felt warm, like it carried a little bit of home with it. The thought stirred something deep in your chest, and you swallowed hard to keep the tears at bay.
“Thank you,” you said quietly, your voice still shaky but sincere. It was the first thing you’d said with any certainty since the reaping. Finnick smiled, not his earlier casual grin, but something softer, like he understood the weight of the moment.
“Don’t mention it,” he said, leaning back in his seat and stretching out his legs. He looked so calm, so unbothered, like he wasn’t sitting across from a tribute destined for the slaughter. “You’re stronger than you think,” he added after a moment, his tone lighter. “Besides, I have a feeling about you.”
You looked up at him, surprised. “A feeling?”
He shrugged. “Call it a mentor’s intuition.”
Before you could ask what that meant, the train slowed, and the intercom crackled to life. “Approaching Capitol Station,” a mechanical voice announced, cheerful and detached.
Your stomach twisted. The Capitol. It had always been this distant, almost mythical place—bright lights, extravagant people, larger-than-life screens showing the Games. But now, it was real, and you were being brought there like an offering.
Finnick must have noticed the shift in your expression because he leaned forward, his voice dropping to a near whisper. “Look, I know it’s overwhelming. The Capitol is… a lot. The people, the cameras, the way they’ll treat you like you’re some shiny new toy. But you can’t let it break you.”
“How?” you asked, the word coming out sharper than you intended. “How am I supposed to pretend I’m okay with all this?”
“You don’t have to be okay with it,” Finnick said, his tone firm but not unkind. “You just have to play their game long enough to survive. They want a show, so give them one. Be memorable. Make them love you.”
The thought of standing in front of the Capitol’s citizens, smiling and pretending, made your skin crawl. But you knew he was right. If you wanted a chance—any chance—you’d have to play along.
The train came to a stop, and the doors hissed open. Finnick stood, smoothing out his shirt before glancing down at you. “Come on,” he said, offering his hand. “Time to meet your audience.”
You hesitated for only a moment before taking it. His grip was steady, grounding. As he helped you to your feet, you realized just how much taller he was, his presence both intimidating and reassuring.
The station was blinding, a whirlwind of lights, colors, and noise. Capitol citizens were gathered, their outlandish outfits glittering under the fluorescent lights as they clapped and cheered. Camera flashes erupted in quick bursts, and you instinctively shrank back.
“Stand tall,” Finnick murmured, his hand briefly brushing your shoulder. “They’ll smell fear if you let them.”
Drawing in a shaky breath, you straightened your spine, forcing yourself to lift your chin. You felt the weight of a hundred eyes on you, but Finnick’s steady presence at your side kept you from completely unraveling.
As you stepped off the train, you realized this was only the beginning. The Capitol, the Games, the fight for survival—it was all ahead of you. But for now, you focused on putting one foot in front of the other, the carved fish still clutched tightly in your hand.
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reblogs and likes are greatly appreciated!
Read part 2 here; https://www.tumblr.com/mscresta/770879367841759232/tribute-parade
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hakugreenfinch · 2 days ago
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i actually firmly believe that even if for the wrong reasons, curly was right to not give anya the captain gun.
im basing this on the assumptions/readings that a) jimmy was abusing both curly and anya in different ways, b) he assaulted anya in her sleep (i have several reasons to believe so) and as a consequence c) curly did not realize things were that bad until it was way too late (obligatory "even though yeah he should have taken anya seriously from the first report of 'hey jimmy was in my room last night'") but neither did anya really grasp just how badly she was being abused until after the dead pixel conversation (i think this is important because it shows just how careful jimmy was in his machinations).
the thing is we want to believe that oh sure if anya had a gun it would have been fine. but the other thing is that if you have a weapon in self defense - your attacker also has that weapon. giving anya the gun would have been as good as giving jimmy the gun and cocking it for him too - not to mention we actually experience that the gun isnt easy to fire, thus making it less reliable in the case of an emergency than one would think.
anya assumed curly wouldnt have given her the gun because she knew his relationship with jimmy, she knew curly would be worried she would hurt herself with it and she knew the company sucked and would have penalized them all if the gun got out of its case for reasons they dont deem "justified" - they didnt put locks on the sleeping quarters, i doubt they would rule anya's personal safety as reason enough. i think her assumptions in that were correct, curly isnt super strict as a captain but hes not "sure heres the super locked safety gun" lax. he trusted swansea with the axe because he trusted swansea to use it appropriately, he wouldnt have trusted anya with a firearm if she was in mental distress.
i dont think those were the good reasons to not let anya protect herself in this way ("corporate/jimmy will get mad" just is not it). but i do believe if he did give her the gun it would have been a matter of time before jimmy gets ahold of it and shit goes south a lot sooner. i believe jimmy isnt brave enough to do anything to anya while she could ask for help - his entire tactic is based on only letting anyone else notice small things that he could make excuses for. he probably would have taken it from anya while she was asleep, when she didnt have it right in her hand, when she looked away for a moment. it doesnt really matter, he would have found a way, boom, jimmy has a gun now.
why i think that would have been a lot worse than him acquiring the gun as late as he does in the game is that jimmy is pretty much fueled by a hunger for power and control. he gets those once curly is out of the picture as someone capable of running the ship but before the crash? hes very sneaky about his manipulation. he goes after anya physically when nobody can catch him because he can overpower her but he wouldnt try something like that with curly who is likely physically stronger than him (curly weight lifts in his free time!) which is why he puts pressure on him emotionally. the crash is actually very convenient for jimmy, he gets to usurp the title of captain without having to actually do anything to curly himself (as in, with his very own hands and with the intent of getting him out of his way). i just truly think if he had gotten his hands on the gun while curly still fully believed he was his friend and could fight back things would have gotten very ugly a whole lot faster.
tl;dr i think "anya should have had the gun" is something we want to believe would have saved the entire crew but considering jimmy's methods of exercising power over his crewmates proves otherwise. curly had the wrong reasons to not arm anya, but ultimately the longer the gun is out of jimmy's view the better.
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pintrestgrl · 2 days ago
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Stop I’m being messyyyyy but I need a crossover between precious and rafey boy. eek omg imagine rafe fucking her behind Barry and Roxy’s back
I mean think about it she’s superrrr cute and desperate for attention
no one ever knows anything for like YEARSSS (Roxy’s freinds swear they saw precious at tannyhill more than once when Barry was delivering drugs a town over and she was at a family gathering on the mainland but she doesn’t think he’ll stoop that low + she believes Barry has his girl “under control” ) until Roxy goes through rafes old trap phone and finds a secret folder of precious getting fucked by him throught the years starting when she first dropped out. But by then Barry and precious have already gone MIA
I think it makes sense idk tho you call the shots.
ok i def wanna write this … but i fear precious is NOT attending a family reunion.
all her families dead or on drugs , however i can see barry allowing rafe to come to the trailer in georgia bc he trusts him enough.
however he’s not getting in that trailer w precious alone. nobody ever will. however i can see rafe breaking into the house when barry’s not there and finding her asleep !
obv she’s naked bc in what world does precious have clothes on when she’s sleeping.
he would take all these photos of her tits and her pussy , steal a pair of panties and maybe a used pair too.
and then holding her down until she screams as he literally shoves himself inside her .. he recorded it too bc he knew this was a one time chance and wanted something to jerk off too.
precious was literally sobbing and confused and crying as he did it too. all she was doing was screaming for barry , n a part of her almost thought he set her up but gave it a second thought and realized he wouldn’t allow that. however … a part of her did like it but more in a self deprecating way bc she hates herself.
that’s why she never told barry bc she’s a terrible liar and she knew he would b able to tell that she kinda liked it.
this was in the beginning of precious n barry in georgia, n foxy found the vids like 2 yrs later. however 2 yrs ago was the longest her and rafe went w out breaking up which was like 6 months so they were very much tg when he did that.
and the reason he did it really was bc rafe wants to b barry lol. he always has wanted to have as much power and authority as barry does over everyone. it really was all a mental game and mindfuck.
this is so dark and twisted omg … let me know if we want a full in depth drabble ab this !
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starbuck · 2 years ago
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SO, as my fellow BrBaBCS friends may remember, it’s been my theory ever since I started rewatching BrBa that the timing of the DEA going after Tuco RIGHT after he started selling Walt’s supermeth was too coincidental to be true… that it would make sense if Gus was somehow involved considering he was about to secretly launch his own meth business and did NOT want competition from the cartel and ESPECIALLY not a Salamanca.
Eventually though, this theory seemed to be proven false by my being reminded that the DEA found Tuco’s bloody fingerprint on No Doze’s body, giving them a perfectly legitimate excuse to go after Tuco without any outside involvement necessary. That’s what I *thought*… But then this morning I realized that I had overlooked one crucial detail: HOW did the DEA find No Doze and Gonzo’s bodies so quickly in the first place?
They were tucked away in a junkyard SO secluded that a man could be murdered in broad daylight with no one taking notice, but I’m supposed to believe that some random person found Gonzo RIGHT after he died and reported this not just to the police, but to the DEA? A likely story… Instead, let me tell you another story…
Tuco had already been selling Walt’s meth for at least a week prior to the junkyard sale… A new, super-potent strain of meth goes on the market in the ABQ territory and OBVIOUSLY Gus is gonna take notice and be displeased. So what does he do? Well, first he’s gotta figure out where Tuco is getting it from. He has someone (probably Mike) follow Tuco to the junkyard sale and watch the whole thing with binoculars from a distance. He watches Tuco murder No Doze and dispose of his body. Interesting. They’ll put a pin in that. In the meantime, they’ve gotta figure out who these guys Tuco got the blue meth from are.
Canonically, Walt and Jesse are both spied on in the days following the junkyard sale and both assume the culprit to be Tuco, however, I went back and checked and was validated by the fact that, as expected, the car that pulls away from Walt’s house in 2x01 is NOT the same car that Tuco drove to the junkyard. Additionally, Tuco seems surprised to learn Walt’s real name and that he has a family in the following episode, things which shouldn’t have surprised him if he had already been spying on Walt’s home. No, I think a better explanation for all of that was that it was Gus’ guys scoping out the competition (but also happy to let Walt and Jesse THINK it was Tuco because anything to make that relationship more fraught than it already was is to their benefit).
And so that all brings us to the question of who tipped off the DEA… Just as Gus had guys watching Walt and Jesse, someone also must have tailed Gonzo back to the junkyard, watched him die, and, with Tuco now entirely defenseless, decided that this was the moment to strike. They left an anonymous tip with the DEA and then let the law do the rest of the work for them. The way things ultimately went down for Tuco was obviously unplanned… I’m sure the original plan was just to have him imprisoned again, but I can’t imagine that Gus was too unhappy about Tuco’s death, even if he didn’t exactly orchestrate it himself.
This is all heavy conjecture, obviously, but I think it makes sense and I like how this reading lets it mirror Tuco’s going to prison in BCS where, on the face of it, it’s Tuco’s own inability to control his temper fucking him over, but, in truth, he’s also being set up by outside forces he has no knowledge of. Really adds to the tragedy of it all, in my opinion.
#tuco salamanca#the tuco tag always needs more posts so i’m giving it a present#breaking bad#i’m still like. i can’t BELIEVE i never thought about this before#and - for the record - i don’t care if this is ‘actually true’ or not#i do absolutely believe that it was Gus spying on Walt and Jesse in 2x01 and not Tuco#but otherwise i’m 100% content to just let this all be my little pet theory#i do not require authorial validation… it’s true in my brain because i decided it is#i ALSO still enjoy the idea that Bolsa and Eladio also wanted Tuco dead and that Gus secretly had their blessing to do Whatever#either because Eladio felt threatened by Tuco taking on such a profitable deal without running it by him first#or that nobody trusted him with that much power#and meanwhile Gus had his own motivations and was like :)))))))))))))#i just like the idea of the cartel eating itself alive#and it also adds credence to my Bolsa Is A Fake Bitch thing#which - again - is true regardless but this Adds To It#i like that - again - you can draw parallels between BCS where he’s like ‘Hector we obviously respect you so much’#and then after Hector’s stroke he’s like ‘he totally deserved that amirite? lol’#vs. him telling Hector and the twins that their revenge is VERY important to him and the cartel as a whole#while he secretly had given his blessing to Tuco’s demise#it’s all just *chef’s kiss* excellent tragedy all around#anyways i’m very tired so i’m done for now#but feel free to talk to me about this and i can say more in the morning#brba#long post
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dailyloopdeloop · 7 months ago
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loop and mirabelle. That's it that's the ask
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DAY 84: enrolled in the gossip wars
#codacheetah#isat#loop isat#mirabelle isat#isat spoilers#vaguely. mostly for the tags#i think it'd be sooo funny if like. loop and mirabelle postcanon.#loop has rejoined the party somewhat recently and they are not at all adapting. to be honest. reunion probably happened too soon#bc they are a siffrin which means they are disgustingly sentimental. their ass is not taking the time to discover themself as a new person.#do you really think loop is gonna take their own advice.lol.#lmao even#Ok so anyways i think the party and loop would have a weird thing going on#like theyre all extremely grateful to loop. and they trust loop through the general basis of theyre apparently very dear to siffrin#but fucking nobody knows what to make of this bitch. odile knows they are hiding Something but she has no certain evidence to pin it down.#isabeau can't catch loop alone for more than 5 seconds. has the distinct sense they're avoiding him and he does not know why#bonnie....well tbh i think they'd vibe with loop. bonnie win.#mirabelle. i think she wouldn't really like loop? not at first anyways#do you remember in sasasap mirabelle telling siffrin(loop) that for a long time she thought they were a callous sort of person#bc they never took anything seriously at all. like the whole journey didnt mean anything. until they took an eye for bonnie#i think mirabelle would catch a similar vibe towards loop(lol.) bc like#like loop's main presence in the group is negging siffrin and being weird and dodgy around everyone else#i don't even think they'd be mean to the others but they would do everything in their power to throw the party zero bones#so all mirabelle has to go on for loop is that they're kind of a dickhead to her friend and that they're not receptive to normal group#social activities. i think being on the receiving end of mirabelle's kindness would make loop kind of sad and she'd pick up on it#but like. loop is inexplicably important to siffrin. she doesn't know the details bc neither of them want to talk at all about the loops#and i think siffrin would be especially dodgy abt talking about loop in the interrim between them rejoining and them being Presumed Dead#so mirabelle tries a new strategy to bridge the gap between her and loop. the power of Mutual Haterism#more specifically i think mirabelle would get the impression of loop as being much more of a bitch than they actually are#due to the aforementioned siffrin negging#so like. maybe that's just how they socialize maybe they'd be down to talk about hot takes and gossip a bit
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vashtijoy · 1 year ago
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"why not join me instead?" akechi's "invitation" in conf 7
People come and go on whether this question of Akechi's is genuine or not. Opinions run the gamut from "I hate him for trying to take you away from your friends" to "Akechi wants Joker to be his accomplice".
Myself, I don't think Akechi means this as a serious question, for a number of reasons. I think this question is rhetorical.
Quick summary:
Conf 7 illustrates the similarity between Joker and Akechi, and that they're both committed to the showdown between them;
Rather than being an invitation, Akechi's question again illustrates that parallel—that neither of them will give up the things that matter to them to join the other, as Joker has asked him to do;
"I'll think about it" does not count towards the third awakening—and I can prove it. Rather, Akechi can't conceive that Joker would ever abandon his friends, and uses it as an outrageous example of something Joker would never do;
Joker's loyalty not only to his principles but to his friends is something Akechi values so much that he won't let Joker sacrifice it;
Akechi is not so much offering Joker a way out in conf 7 (there is no way out) as he's confirming for his own sake that Joker is still in the game. Is this still a battle between rivals, or is it an execution?
Let's take a look.
what is akechi really asking?
[long post is long]
Look at this line. Look at the question he's posing:
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Akechi いっそ君がこっちに来るってのは?⋯今の仲間を捨ててさ。 isso kimi ga kocchi ni kuru tte no wa?... ima no nakama o sutete sa Why not join me instead...? All you'd have to do is abandon the teammates you have now.
It's very easy to focus on the first half of this question and miss the second. But that second half is the important part, the sting in the tail. The Japanese is a great example of wa building suspense: "Instead, what if you come over to my side, (AND THEN WHAT, AKECHI???????)"
The sentence is left hanging, with the weight of it unspoken (since wa emphasises what comes after it); Akechi is obviously not done speaking. And indeed, when he continues, it's a doozy:
"though, of course, you'd have to dump the friends you have now." (Yes, I think "friends" is often a much better translation of nakama than "teammates", fight me; it's even often translated as "friend" in P5 itself, or indeed, awkwardly, as "teammates and friends".)
Akechi is using the same verb, suteru, that you use for tossing something in the trash; the parallel meaning, "ending a relationship", exists in Japanese too.
Ryuji, Morgana, Ann, Yusuke, Makoto, Futaba, Haru, everything you've all gone through together and everything you've been—Akechi is suggesting you toss them aside like garbage. For him.
Now, I think part of Akechi would very much like Joker to do that. But he also knows better than to expect it. Because he knows Joker so much better than that.
Akechi has seen firsthand how loyal Joker is to his friends—remember on 1/2 how he says he investigated them all? He's seen some of the things Joker will do for them. He expects that blind faith to lead Joker to his death, much as Yaldabaoth does. But he also respects it.
This boy who's never had a friend, who's convinced himself the whole idea is stupid, is still drawn to the loyalty he sees in Joker. Even as he's preparing his own ultimate betrayal, Akechi recognises Joker's commitment to others. He understands treachery is bad, even though he himself is a traitor—just as he understands that murder is bad, and that doesn't stop him, either.
This question of whether or not Joker will betray his friends (and Akechi specifically) comes back on 2/2, of course—and in force.
so why does he ask
Akechi is not proposing that the two of them run off together. He's not asking to see what Joker will say. He doesn't impulsively make the invitation, and then run away when Joker says yes. He is, in fact, not even asking. He poses the idea of Joker abandoning all his friends as a counterexample. It's supposed to be something Joker would never consider, something he will find morally repugnant.
Which is why, if Joker says yes, Akechi is shocked, and essentially tells Joker not to make such stupid spur-of-the-moment decisions. Akechi is making a rhetorical point about what Joker is asking of him.
Remember Joker's statement that leads into Akechi's question:
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Yeah. Joker either suggests that Akechi should give up everything he's doing and everything he believes in (even as Akechi confabulates about what those things really are), or he suggests, with the top option, that he's already done it.
And in return, Akechi says that Joker should join him... and throw away his friends and everything he's working for and everything he believes in, of course.
It's the second response to his question, where Joker turns him down flat, that makes it most obvious that this was what Akechi meant:
Joker それは無理だ sore wa muri da I'm not doing that. No way in hell. Akechi だろうね。 darou ne I thought as much. Akechi 分かるだろ、誰だって今の立場を簡単に捨てられやしないんだよ wakaru daro, dare datte ima no tachiba o kantan ni suterare yashinai n da yo I'm sure you understand. We all have our parts to play, and we can't simply leave those behind.
See what he's saying? ima no tachiba o kantan ni suterare yashinai—"we absolutely must not lightly set aside the positions we hold now".
Incidentally, yes, that's that same verb suteru that he used before, for casting aside or throwing away. Akechi is drawing a parallel between Joker's friends and his own goals—between the things each of them holds most dear, which neither of them will sacrifice, even to save the other. (Assuming you think Akechi would even be down to save Joker—but I do think conf 7 suggests that at this point, he might not be opposed to the possibility. It's just that it doesn't exist.)
the phone call
This parallel returns in the phone call afterwards, if you again tell him that you're rivals:
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It's a little hard to tell from the localisation what Akechi is getting at, so let's take a close look:
Akechi 僕らにはお互い譲れないものがあって、そのためにも負けられない。 bokura ni wa otagai yuzurenai mono ga atte, sono tame ni mo makerarenai [lit. for both of us, these are things we cannot compromise on, and because of those things we cannot suffer losing.] Neither of us can afford to lose, because we fight in service of our principles. It's the same for both of us. Neither of us can afford to lose, because of these principles we won't concede. Akechi ⋯だからこそ、もしも君が自分を曲げたりしたら絶対に赦さないよ。 ... dakara koso, moshi mo kimi ga jibun o megetari shitara zettai ni yurusanai yo [lit. that's exactly why, if you were to warp yourself [that way], I would absolutely never let such a sin (t/n: note the kanji) pass.] And that is precisely why... I cannot allow you to change. ... And that's precisely why, if you betrayed yourself that way... I couldn't allow it. Akechi だって、僕が負けたくないのは『君』なんだから。 datte, boku ga maketakunai no wa "kimi" nan da kara [lit. it's you as you are now who I do not want to lose to.] As you are now, as you think now... I cannot allow you to win over me. The person you are now, with those principles, and that determination—that's the one I won't ever allow to beat me.
Here's my attempt at a translation again, so you can see it all together:
Akechi: It's the same for both of us. Neither of us can afford to lose, because of these things we won't concede. Akechi: ...And that's precisely why, if you betrayed yourself that way... I couldn't allow it. Akechi: The person you are now, with those principles, and that determination—that's the one I won't ever allow to beat me.
It turns out that this phone conversation, that was originally quite mystical-sounding and hard to follow (what were you trying to say, Akechi?) is quite straightforward. It ties into to his original question. "Will I join you, Joker? Well, what if you join me instead? Just throw away all your little friends for my sake? Of course you won't—because we're the same. Both of us have things we can't give up, no matter what—and if you tried to do that, I wouldn't let you, because I value you as you are...."
This parallel between the two of them is what conf 7 is about, from the text message that opens it to the phone call that concludes it:
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It's the same thing again: neither of you can afford to lose, because you're fighting for your principles. The billiard table is the stage for this wider discussion.
The billiard scene, of course, is interesting for another reason—Akechi is giving Joker a chance to back out; he's testing his commitment, and perhaps hinting that he never intended to be quite where he is, either. He states at the outset that he's being indirect, that what he's saying is a metaphor—and then closes that metaphor with a very direct question: "Do you still intend to play this game?"
Akechi それでも君は、このゲームを降りる気はないの? sore demo kimi wa, kono geemu o oriru ki wa nai no? Even then... do you still intend to play this game? But despite all of that, you still won't fold, will you?
The Japanese is even more specific: Akechi asks Joker if he intends to fold—not whether he still wants to play, but whether he means to give up entirely! "This can't be what you expected, so how about it? Will you just give up? Does this mean as much to you as it does to me? Is this a game we both choose to play, or are you just a victim?"
How much of this is Akechi blowing smoke up his own ass?—casting the fact that he's about to murder the boy in front of him in a glowing, romantic light? Pretty much all of it, I'd say. He's dreamed of having a rival, someone to compete with who challenges him, but what he's got is quite a bit more than that.
Again, the rival imagery is what allows Akechi not only to accept this close relationship, but to frame it as a life-or-death contest that only one of them can win. It confirms to him that what Lavenza describes as "a truly unfair game" is actually fair. It's about making Joker's murder seem as much Joker's fault as his own.
but what happens if you say yes?
Despite all of this, you can choose to have Joker consider Akechi's "offer"—to discard Ryuji, Morgana, Ann, Yusuke, Makoto, Futaba and Haru like trash, and assist Akechi instead. It's tempting, I know.
I don't personally get the impression that Akechi likes this response, for a number of reasons. None of the three responses to his offer score confidant points, but there's something else in play: only one of these responses unlocks his third awakening.
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See the F code highlighted in yellow? Only one of these three responses has it. "You're my rival" counts towards the third awakening. Rejecting him, with "I'm not doing that", does not—but more to the point, offering to be with him, with "I'll think about it", also does not!
The issue is confused because a number of us have taken option 1 (or indeed option 2, like me) and still got the third awakening on 2/2. It seems like you need some of the flagged responses, not all of them. But it remains the case that "I'll think about it" does not make Akechi more likely to have his third awakening.
What happens if you take this option?
Joker 考えておく kangaete oku I'll think about it. Akechi へえ、考えてはくれるんだ? hee, kangaete wa kureru n da? Oh? So you'll think about it, at least? What? You mean you'll consider it? Akechi ⋯でも、そういうその場限りの情はやめた方がいい。 ...demo, sou iu sono ba kagiri no jou wa yameta hou ga ii ...But I'd advise you don't say these things without their due consideration. ... Still, it would be better if you didn't trust such fleeting sentiments. Akechi 出来もしない約束はするものじゃないよ。 deki mo shinai yakusoku wa suru mono ja nai yo You shouldn't make promises that you can't keep, anyway. Don't be the sort who promises the earth and walks away.
A few grammar points:
んだ n da on a question demands an explanation; Akechi's question could almost be rendered "Why on earth would you need/want to think about it?"
そういうその場限りの情 sou iu sono ba kagiri no jou—"sentiments that only matter here and now". Essentially, "sentiments that won't last"—or that are makeshift or ad hoc; Joker is making a stupid spur-of-the-moment decision.
yes, 出来もしない約束 deki mo shinai yakusoku translates idiomatically as "promising the earth". The point is not that Joker should not promise; the point is that he shouldn't be the sort of person who promises so much—and then doesn't follow through.
Again, this confidant is all about Akechi's expectations for Joker. It's about the weird belief he has in him, like the belief he has in Shido—that Joker has principles and friends and will stand by them, that those things are important and matter, even if they're diametrically opposed to Akechi's principles and the things he wants.
The fact that they foil each other in this way is a large part of what makes Joker such a worthy opponent for Akechi. So if Joker turns around and says, sure, Akechi, I'll dump all my friends so we can make out?
Akechi does not like that. He thinks better of him!—he loses respect if Joker offers this. Even if that little line about "promising the earth" suggests that, actually, yeah, he would quite like for the two of them to run away together—if only they lived in a world where it was possible.
what about "you're my rival"?
I've discussed this line before, but let's go into it for completeness.
Joker 明智は好敵手だ akechi wa koutekishu da You're my rival. Nah, you're my worthy opponent.
Do you see that Joker names Akechi there? He doesn't just say, "we're worthy opponents", or even "you're my worthy opponent", koutekishu da yo.
No, he picks Akechi out by name, and then tells him exactly what they are to each other. Because wa builds suspense. Akechi wa... (what?! what is he?!) koutekishu da. "I can't run away with you, because I need you to be this to me instead".
And this is the line with the F-code. This is the line that, if you choose it, will build towards Akechi's third awakening—which is centred on his trust in Joker, on the fact that Joker is worthy of that trust.
And how does Akechi respond?
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He's astonished. He did not expect this at all, look:
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On the left, the top screenshot where he's waiting for your answer; in the centre, the moment of shock, where he's pulled away and dropped his hand and his eyes are wide; on the right, a comparative overlay just to demonstrate that he pulled back.
smiles that aren't smiles
I have a half-assed theory that you can tell when Akechi is really smiling—because the model will smile with him. If you watch, for instance, Ryuji, the model's expressions match the sprite's almost exactly. But if you watch Akechi? Nah, not so much.
Here's an example. Akechi appears to smile quite often through conf 7—but if you glance away from the sprite and textbox to the model, the model is pokerfaced. Five smile sprites on the optimal route through conf 7, and not one of them—not even "you truly are fascinating"—matches the model:
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But when you pick "You're my rival"? Suddenly the model's face springs to life:
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It's obvious from everything else that this moment is of deep significance to Akechi. But this little detail with the smiles suggests we can confirm it.
and what does he say?
It doesn't take long for him to pull himself together:
Akechi 同意だね、僕らにはなれ合いより対等な関係こそふさわしい。 doui da ne, bokura ni wa nareai yori taitouna kankei koso fusawashii I agree. I think a relationship of equals suits us better than being co-conspirators, anyway...
This is another one that I find unclear in the localisation, so let's have at it.
nareai suggests an illicit or unduly-close union. It suggests "being in bed together" in the business sense—cosying up, colluding, conspiring. It suggests they're working together when they shouldn't be. Jisho uses the screamingly-outdated term "common-law marriage" (what we call "living together") as an example. Essentially, it suggests they're too close—or even co-dependent, in a way that corrupts them both.
In short? Akechi's "co-conspirators", nareai, means "accomplices"—what we might call "murder boyfriends".
taitouna kankei—literally, "an equal relationship"—is a set phrase, and we know what it means. It suggests a relationship where nobody is being cheated; where everyone gets out what they put in. Where the two of them compete on equal terms.
That's a very Akechi way to look at relationships. But it's also a relationship where nobody is in charge; nobody is dominant, and everyone has self-respect. Nobody is chasing after anyone or sacrificing unduly, as either would be if they joined the other. Everyone can be who they are and say what they want. Everyone can say no.
It's the sort of relationship Akechi very notably does not have with Shido. Is it the sort of relationship he has with Joker, when the two of them are hiding so much from each other and lying so much, and there's so much, like, murder going on? Nah. But as an aspiration, as a suggestion of the sort of relationship Akechi would like them to have, alongside everything else he's told us about how he sees the two of them—as similar, as equals and opposites, as bound by their principles, as destined to fight—it's almost touching.
and what does joker think?
Akechi ⋯たとえこの先、何があろうともだ。 ...tatoe kono saki, nani ga arou tomo da ...No matter what else may change. ...No matter what might come next. Akechi それだけの事を言ったんだから、逃げないでよ? sore dake no koto o itta n da kara, nigenaide yo? In any case, what you just said carries great weight. Remember what you decided, and don't run from it. All right? [lit. don't run away just because of what [I/you] said, all right?]
I'm not sure about this. It feels like it should be referring back to Akechi's last line—"don't get cold feet and run away just because I alluded ominously to whatever's coming next, okay?". I guess it could be referring to Joker's commitment, with "You're my rival"? IDK, I'm out on this one, so I'm inclined to give the localisation the benefit of the doubt.
But it doesn't matter. Because the significance of what Joker does next doesn't change:
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He nods. Akechi spends the whole confidant hinting that something ominous is coming, and that the two of them are heading to an inevitable confrontation, and Joker nods.
I don't think this is really consistent with interpretations where Joker is a meek little sheep in the interrogation room. Joker might not have chosen this, he might not have wanted it, he might have by far preferred to avoid it. He'd happily back out if Akechi would just drop the whole thing and agree to act sane. But he's committed to it. He agrees to fight.
Remember, conf 7 takes place after Joker hears the murder phone call. He knows what Akechi is. He knows what he's planning. He knows the stakes—and he agrees to play, to face Akechi down.
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To quote @nardaviel, that's no sheep. That's a full-on "Phantom Thieves win again, motherfucker" smirk. Joker played Akechi's game, with everything he had—and he played to win.
#persona 5#p5 meta#japanese language#shuake#goro akechi#ren amamiya#almost the worst part of this is that akechi respecting joker for his loyalty tells you how little he respects himself#also! 'i'll think about it' CANNOT POSSIBLY unlock the third awakening#because the third awakening is *all about trust* and saying yes to akechi proves that you're a traitor#and that 'i won't forgive you if you betray your principles' on the phone? also 2/2. this is exactly what he does if you take the deal#also!! joker makes a third option to akechi's question with 'you're my rival' and this is what astonishes him besides the thing itself#also! (per leonawriter) the maruki deal ending is essentially the nareai relationship#where akira has all the power and akechi..? well#nobody is themself or choosing for themself#also as regards whether akechi is lying he proves himself through action#'i won't let you betray yourself' - he did that already if you tried to take the deal#ALSO? that 'megeru' for 'i won't let you depart from your principles comes back on 2/2#as joker's 'i won't fold'#and ofc it's ALSO akechi's 'you'd fold over...' that precedes that. it was set up in conf 7 if you took the rival route#so tldr it's plausible that 2/2 is as much akechi fighting for his vision of joker as for his right to die. help???#ALSO. did you wonder why it's *awakening* akechi who comes to leblanc? the one closer to you who believes in you more?#this is exactly why. awakening akechi has faith left in you to lose. non-awakening akechi already lost that faith. BYE
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bo0zey · 2 years ago
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being the oldest daughter raised by a narcissistic emotionally abusive father is just…👩‍🍳👌💋
#i don’t know why i always end up crying when i know exactly what to expect from him#the constant belittling then turning around and crying victim on how i ‘hurt’ him bc he can’t accept the fact that he did something wrong#i know i shouldn’t expect anything from him but it’s like this stupid fucking useless part of me during these moments is just#so heartbroken and frustrated because it’s not fair the child in me just wants to have a dad that cares and sees her as a human#nobody fuckjng cares if they hurt me and i don’t care if they hurt me either that’s why i hurt me too#he’s supposed to be my dad he’s my only parent left and he never should’ve been a parent to begin#i can’t believe how easily he turns things on me saying it’s my fault i never come talk to him and it’s like how the fuck#you were barely basically nonexistent the first 5 years of my life then barely there from then on out#how could i ever come to you how could i trust you just because i’m your daughter by blood doesn’t mean you’re not a stranger to me#you’re supposed to be the adult you’re my father you’re supposed to come to me and guide me why are you such a helpless fucking child#i do everything on my own i have nothing to say to you just like you have nothing to say to me#small talk only does so much i don’t want to talk to him i don’t care about our relationship#i’m just literally flabbergasted at the audacity he has to gaslight and manipulate me and ply victim when i’m the one he keeps hurting#it just reinforces the idea that my feelings are invalid my feelings have been invalid to him for the past 23years#i wish i was emotionless and unfeeling i wish he didn’t have the power to affect my emotions so strongly#i’m such a little kid i wish my mom was here i wish someone wanted to protect me and talk to me and at least try to understand me#i can’t wait to be dead i just want this to be over i’m just wasting time taking up someone else’s space#i think the only time i’ll be genuinely happy is when i’m dead#i don’t remember the last time i was actually happy unless i’m distracting myself#i’m constantly maladaptive daydreaming and when i’m not i’m at work trying to be a functioning an adult#but as soon as i’m home i’m back in my dream world where i don’t have to think about me at all#when gerard said When i grow up i want to be nothing at All that man read my my mind#ramblings#vent
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thedreadvampy · 1 year ago
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thought too hard about my adolescence made myself sad 🥲
#red said#the thing is that i was talking to mum about a time when i was 17 when i almost left my ex but didn't#partly bc i was too scared cause it was 3am and i was in another town and i was either going to have to wait 3 hours for the first bus#or call home and wake my dad up and i thought he'd be so mad at me and i wouldn't know how to explain#and like with the power of 30 year old hindsight. he would not have been angry.#like i know that NOW. NOW i know his whole family history involves a lot of domestic violence and he'd be there to protect me#but i didn't know that when i was 17 i didn't know that he'd understand i was Just Scared#so i stayed and i stayed in that relationship another year and it got a lot worse#but some of it's like. how much of nobody coming to get me was that? would people have come if I'd just asked???#and some of it's like. even if I'd known i could trust him i still couldn't have called my dad. cause i didn't trust myself.#like if I'd called anyone or left in the night at some point i would have had to explain. and he Barely Hit Me At All at that point#and i didn't have the vocabulary to frame the main stuff he was doing as abuse cause it wasn't overtly violent#even though it was. definitely. rape and emotional abuse.#so like i never left bc i couldn't construct a good enough explanation to myself of why i needed to#and i just stayed and got sadder and more withdrawn and more tired#and that sucks. like it's not even just that i didn't reach out for help it's that i COULDN'T#it took me until i was like 25 to even figure out that i COULD#and that's sad cause it's not even that i was it there alone. people would have come for me if i knew how to get off the island
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konigsblog · 3 months ago
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OCTOBER 1ST — DOCTOR!KÖNIG. Being drugged and used relentlessly by someone you thought you could trust. (NON-CON)
2024 KINKTOBER MASTERLIST. (DAY 1)
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König had everything planned out, ever since he laid his silver eyes on your face — his newest patient. He was fixated, completely and utterly obsessed with you.
He had spent hours in front of a computer studying nonstop so that he could earn himself a degree in medicine and have the perfect and perverted opportunity to take advantage of and intoxicate oblivious and beautiful women inside of the privacy of his office, to force vulnerable and drugged patients to become his personal sex slaves under the guise that he was just doing his job, taking proper care of his patients in his own special, unique way that would forever morph and change their brain chemistry. A sick individual looking for any chance to feel a woman's touch, to feel their blood soak and coat his hung, painful cock.
He put on the façade of a caring and gentle doctor. His touch was soft and his words were reassuring and full of concern. Nobody would dare accuse König of rape. You had no reason to feel afraid of him. He would rut into your soft and slick folds ruthlessly, with one large gloved hand cupped over your mouth, silencing your mumbled, incoherent, and drowsy pleas. Your eyes became half-lidded, hazy and bleary, with a lone tear slowly wandering your cheeks at the growing, throbbing, and pulsating sensation that only worsened between your legs.
“Wie kann ich dir widerstehen, Kleines? So ahnungslos, du hast nichts geahnt.” [How can I resist you, little one? So clueless, you had no idea.] König growled out quietly, his touch feeling much more sinister than it ever had.
He gazed down at you through the thin lenses of his glasses, his large and hefty cock splitting you open agonisingly slowly with his creamy tip prodding against your gummy cervix. König knew he had full control and final authority over you, especially in your vulnerable and drugged state, where you clung to him, falling in and out of consciousness, forced to rely on him. The desperation in your kicks and slaps tugged at his heartstrings, yet, not enough to convince him to stop. His pace never faltered — only intensified.
He found joy and entertainment in the power he had, especially knowing that he could easily hold you down and ruin you if he truly wanted to. You wouldn't remember a thing. Your speech was slurred and broken. The intensity of the drug was overpowering, leaving you unable to protect yourself — not that you'd be able to resist König, anyway. Your attempts at fighting back were fruitless, impossible to fight back against the sickening, harsh pervert hunched over your form and bruising your hole.
König didn't once fear the repercussions for his criminal and taboo acts. After all, who would believe you, a miserable and drugged patient, over König, a respected doctor, and with his powerful reputation?
His tone was condensing and playful from what you could manage to remember through unconsciousness. It felt as if he was toying with you, fuckin’ with your head, mocking you for being so trusting of him. You could feel everything; the way he was splitting you open, spearing you on his large, swollen length. You could feel him leaving your skin filthy, staining you with his dirty, grubby touch as his hung balls smacked against your rear repetitively, his pubes grazing against your smooth, supple skin.
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i2sunric · 4 months ago
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𝐖𝐀𝐑 𝐎𝐅 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 (p.sh)
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PAIRING: knight!sunghoon x queen!reader (f)
SUMMARY: after your parents death, you were forced to be crowned queen of the north realm and decided to take a young sergeant as your personal guard. however, you can’t ignore the evident tension between the two of you, that will lead to some… illicit affairs. well, it never happened if nobody knows, right?
WARNINGS: 1800s au. mentions of war and death, fencing terms, sexual tension, unprotected sex (they didn’t have condoms, did they?), masturbation, dirty talk, missionary, fingering, cream pie, angst if you squint (like, really squint), mentions of scars, pet names (sweetheart), i abused the world ‘would’. i know. lmk if more. NOT PROOFREAD.
PUBLISHED: 20th August 2024
WC: 6k
TAGLIST: (permanent) @stolasisyourparent @jaeyunsbimbo @jwnghyuns @bangtancultsposts @shawnyle @jooniesbears-blog @skzenhalove @ro-diaries @onlyhyunjin @xcosmi @strawberrhypen @heeheeswifey y @destinyhoon (oneshot) @indigoez @astratlantis @shuichi-sama @skaterhoon @simsungsims @hoonatic @sammie217 @hoonics @kissesforthefangirl @woorcve @laurradoesloveu @capri-cuntz @whateverhoon @woninluv @cyjhhyj @alienqbrain BOLDS COULD NOT BE TAGGED.
NOW PLAYING: War Of Hearts by Ruelle
a/n: honestly, i don’t like it. the idea was good, the outcome not so, but let me know your thoughts. i literally don’t know old english, my knowledge comes from pride and prejudice and bridgerton, im sorry (i gave up by the end and it shows). please LIKE & REBLOG (or don’t, cause this is the worst fic i’ve ever written lol)
You hadn’t realised just how drastically your life could change overnight until you woke up to the news that your father, the ever so powerful king of the North realm, had died in war.
Soon, your teachers were making you learn about strategies and alliances, not about history anymore, your legions kneeled before you, ready to be at your service.
You had to watch your mother, the woman you looked up to, being consumed by the grief of her dead husband until the grim reaper decided to make them reunite.
Leaving you all alone. Helpless, bearing a burden so heavy it crashed your shoulders.
In just the span of a month you found yourself leading a kingdom through war, sending hundreds of warriors to their death sentence.
The crown weighed significantly on your head, your desk was full of scrambled letters and quills dripping ink, and if it wasn’t for your most-trusted maid, Ella, you would’ve certainly already died of hunger, leaving your people without a ruler.
Fortunately, the same day of your coronation, the first day of you being a queen was also the first day of a young sergeant.
He was the youngest of all, just like you being the youngest of the monarchs, and was leading the loyal legion.
Doing a better job than you, you had to say. He was diligent, perfect in his tasks and polite whenever you interpellated him.
His name was Park Sunghoon, and it didn’t take much for you to nominate him as your personal royal guard.
He was an attractive man, barely a couple of years older than you but he indeed towered you by much.
Sunghoon’s face was sharp, with a defined jawline and hardly any trace of baby-fat left.
Despite his frail appearance, you knew he had defined muscles hidden under his white guard uniform, you had seen it.
Even if you were busy with your tight schedule, especially after your coronation, you still found the time to peek at him.
In the morning he’d train the royal legions, helping new warriors. In the afternoon, he would follow you through your travels around the realm, visiting villages and other castles.
The days you stayed at the castle he’d occupy his afternoons by doing some training alone and some evenings he would stand out of your bedroom to guard.
And Sunghoon? Well, he was as attracted to you as you were.
It always sent jolts of excitement whenever he was around you, walking you to your activities and always keeping an eye for possible harms.
Especially one day, when Ella ran towards him with a bucket full of water when he was guarding your bedroom “Sergeant!” She panted, “Please, would you be so kind to bring this into her majesty’s room? I need to get another one.”
Sunghoon was quick to nod “Of course.” He replied politely and took the heavy — for her, not so for him — bucket from her hands.
Ella sincerely thanked him and hurried away to complete her task while the young guard opened your bedroom door.
When his eyes raised to your figure, he saw you standing there… naked. Probably expecting your maid to enter and certainly not your personal guard.
Your hands quickly shot to cover your dignity, your cheeks tinting a deep shade of pink as you breathed “Dear lord.”
Had he been more reckless, he would’ve dropped the bucket, but he managed to keep his polite demeanour.
“My sincere apologies, my lady, I should’ve knocked.” He turned slightly to the side so as not to look at you, but still managed to peek from the corner of his eye.
“D-doesn’t matter..” You murmured, reaching for the nightgown on the chair of the desk and quickly slipping it on “I just didn’t expect it to be… you, sergeant.”
Sunghoon nodded, “Where do you want me to place this?” He asked, raising the container of water.
You stepped aside, hugging your arms like you were afraid your nightgown could reveal your body to him once more. Not like he would complain.
“Inside the tub would be great.” You replied, watching as he lifted the bucket and dropped the hot water in it.
Sunghoon dared to look at you only then, bowing his head slightly “I apologise again. I did not wish to make you uncomfortable.”
You let out a small breath and offered him a warm smile. You were always so kind and thoughtful to everyone, it made him want to lock those who dared to criticise you in the dungeons and make them all perish.
“Worry not,” Your voice was gentle, like a ray of sunshine through the storm “I forgive you, after all, it was an accident.”
Sunghoon thought that if he ever had the chance to take a glimpse at your perfect, naked body, he would���ve taken it right away.
But he chose against letting you know and opted for a “Thank you, my queen.” He bowed, “Anything else you need for me?”
“No, thank you.” You said “You can go back to your duty.”
He nodded and headed to the door, hesitating for a second and then walked out.
The image of your naked body was hard to remove from his mind. Sergeant.
Your curves, your dips, the colour of your skin, your breasts and your pretty pussy… Sergeant?
He wondered what you would feel like if he touched you, tasted you— “Sergeant!”
The voice of one of the royal guards snapped Sunghoon out of his thoughts. He cleared his throat “Yes?”
“It’s my turn,” He said, his eyes blinking faintly “Are you feeling alright?”
“Yes, worry not.” Sunghoon nodded and gave his farewell to the guard before walking to his chamber.
Since you had labelled him worthy of being your personal knight, his bedroom was in the same wing as yours, unlike all the other knights in the legion that stayed in the West wing.
He entered his chamber and closed the door behind his back, the room was dark except for the moonlight shining from the window.
It was better that way, he enjoyed the natural light, rather than the artificial one from the candles that also smelled bad and spread smoke in the room.
Sunghoon sighed, quickly removing his uniform to put on some more comfortable clothes, some black pants and a white, sleeved shirt.
He dropped down on the bed, another quiet sigh leaving his lips.
He rested one of his arms behind his head while he played mindlessly with the laces of his shirt.
It was stronger than him, his mind kept replaying the same scene over and over again.
Your body.
Perhaps, it was that you were so modest, despite literally being the ruler of the kingdom, or it was the fact that you were literally his type.
But he was drawn to you, the same way a donkey was to the apple in front of him. Maybe not the best example, but you get it.
At the thought of your flushed face, he felt his pants growing tighter. At your plump and tender lips, he palmed himself to soothe his growing desire.
At the memory of your perky nipples and your breasts, his hand slipped inside his trousers until he pulled them down to his ankles.
Sunghoon knew he couldn’t be loud, but the soft whimpers and groans that left his lips weren’t contained.
He imagined it was your hand, the one providing him relief, that you were down on your knees, batting your eyelashes at him.
“Oh yes, you’re so good.” He whispered, squeezing the base of his thick cock, it twitched.
The tip was angry red as he heavenly stroked it, never focusing on one place more than the other.
If it were you, would you lick his tip? Would you squeeze his balls and take him in your mouth?
Would you ever fit him all?
“Take my cock,” He groaned, thrusting his hips upward to fuck his fist “Take it like a good girl.”
He pressed two fingers on the tip of his length, edging himself “You like to tease, my lady?”
So many filthy scenes played in his mind, keeping him company as he felt the sweet sensation in his lower stomach.
“I’m so close, sweetheart.” He groaned, moving his hand so fast it almost hurt his wrist “You want it on your breasts? Of course.” He kept moving until he saw white, “Take it.”
He was left spent, dirty white all over his sheets as he tried to even his breath.
Sunghoon fell asleep with a smile on his face that night, and he woke up even better after you visited his dreams and showed him how much you wanted him.
…Too bad it wasn’t real, right?
𓆩♡𓆪
After your little and awkward interaction with Sunghoon, the previous evening, you decided to go find him during his late afternoon training.
You would’ve lied if you were to say it didn’t turn you on, the thought of being seen by him in such an intimate manner. But that, he mustn’t know.
He was wearing a black sleeved shirt and a pair of trousers of the same colour, a great contrast with his skin.
You quietly tip-toed, walking towards as he stroked in the air with the fencing sword.
His movements were calculated, precise and so mesmerising you hadn’t even realised you were right behind him until the blade stopped right beside your jugular.
You gulped “Good evening.” Sunghoon widened his eyes and quickly placed himself into a more polite position, removing the swords from your neck “I'm so sorry, my lady, I didn’t see you coming.”
You just smiled at him “You seem excellent at fencing.” You commented, your fingertips trailing the blade of the sword, careful not to cut yourself.
“Fencing is one of my favourite parts of training, my queen.” He replied, his tone serious.
You hummed “Is that so?” The way the sunset kissed his skin, how his hair was perfectly combed and matched with his fit looked straight out of the erotic novels you hid under your bed.
“I’ve always wanted to learn this type of art.” You informed him “Though, it would be too scandalous for a woman to do it, wouldn’t it?”
Sunghoon’s gaze was soft as he commented “There’s nothing scandalous in wanting to be able to defend yourself.” He threw you a french sword “Even if you have a whole legion before you.”
You swiftly caught it, circling around Sunghoon while he did the same.
“Nah ah,” He was quick to correct “Eyes on the enemy’s, never on the sword.” You diverted your gaze from the sword to his chocolate, warm eyes.
“Great,” Sunghoon praised. “You must study your enemy if you have the time, watch his body language.”
He stroked again and you barely missed it. A second time and you docked it.
At the third, you blocked it “You slightly blink your right eye when you strike.”
Sunghoon smiled proudly, “Yes, that’s right.” You squealed happily, making him slightly widen his eyes.
If it wasn’t the best sound he’d ever heard.
“Now, your strike isn’t bad, especially in second and third, but your position can be better.” He dropped his sword and walked behind you.
“Bend your knees.” He commanded and you obliged again, following his instructions “Your arm shouldn’t stay that far… tilt your elbow.”
“Your back is already straight,” His fingers trailed the laces of your corset, feeling your spine underneath them “But your chin should be tilted… like this.” He tipped your chin up with his index finger.
“How about how?” You whispered breathlessly, feeling the coldness of his skin against your burning one.
“Better, but not perfect.” Sunghoon replied and quickly put space between the two of you “Still, you’re one of my best students.”
You smiled happily and was about to reply when Ella called you from afar because dinner was being served.
You sighed “I must go.” You said, slightly hoping he would keep you with him.
However, obviously, he just nodded and bowed. “It has been a pleasure, my lady.”
As he watched you walk away, he hoped you hadn’t felt the proof of his desire pressed against your back when he fixed your position… the proof he had to fix before anyone could notice.
𓆩♡𓆪
Sunghoon’s footsteps echoed through the dark hallway as he made his way to your room. He wasn’t sure about the reason as to why you called him, given the fact that he was supposed to be patrolling the main gates, but it seemed clear when he noticed you had already sent the guard outside your room to rest.
He stood in front of your bedroom door, the hallway only dimly lit by the few candles on the walls.
There was something in his mind that told him he was still in time to turn his heels and simply ignore your late-night visit request, even if it would eventually get him in trouble.
Still, he aight and placed his hand on the doorknob, quietly opening your bedroom door and entering.
Out of precaution, he locked the door behind him and made a few steps towards you, nevertheless keeping some distance.
“My queen,” Sunghoon began, “I thought you’d be asleep by now.” His tone was quiet, almost concerned.
You were standing in front of the large window that gave you a nice view of the royal gardens, the moonlight illuminating the room as well as a few candles on the tables.
Despite the late hours, you were still wearing your pistachio green gown, your favourite one. The one that once belonged to your mother.
It gave you a sense of comfort, reminiscing the days where you would drown in the fabric as you played queen and princess with her.
You deeply wished it was still a game.
“I’ve been having trouble sleeping.” You replied, still giving him your back.
Sunghoon cleared his throat. Yes, he’d seen you in that gown the same morning, but now, in the intimacy of your chamber, it made him want to drop to his knees.
He made his way so that he was standing just a few steps behind you “Any particular reason for your lack of sleep?” He inquired.
You sighed softly. The moon made your doe eyes sparkle, as if they held the stars in them, “Perhaps, thoughts of the upcoming war.”
Sunghoon’s hands hitched to hold yours, to give you the comfort you needed without any paternal figure to rely on.
Still, he kept them clasped behind his back. The need to be respectful of your position was still in the front of his mind.
“It is not confirmed yet,” He tried to reassure “The other kingdoms may decide not to attack anymore.”
You tried to find reassurance in his words, but even if your people thought so, you weren’t naïve. “They killed my father,” You gulped. “It’s just a matter of time before they come at me next.”
And that was true, everytime you ever tried to close your eyes to seek some rest, your mind would play any possible scenario.
You being slayed, you being beheaded… your kingdom going in flames.
“No one will touch you,” His voice was soothing, like a hand pulling you out of deep water, preventing you from drowning “Not while I’m here.”
You finally allowed yourself to look at him, afraid that if you did it the second you heard the key of your room twisting you would’ve kissed him.
His hair was still perfectly in place, his forehead in sight. His porcelain-like skin glowing under the rays of the moon, caressing his cheeks.
You offered him a polite smile “You seem confident, sergeant.”
Sunghoon let the briefest of a smile form on his lips “Confidence comes with the job,” He said, softly “It is my duty to protect you, my queen, and I take that very seriously.
“What else does your job offer?” You asked, fully turning your body towards him “Apart from private fencing lessons and a twenty-four-seven guarding.”
His breath hitched slightly when you stood in front of him, he hadn’t even realised the vicinity you two had until he had to tilt his head down to stare at you. It would be so easy to reach out and touch you, to feel your skin against his hands.
Sunghoon’s gaze slowly dragged from your chest up to your face. “That’s it, mainly,” He said, his voice a little rougher than before. “Though… my duties extend to anything you ask of me, my queen.”
“Anything?” You murmured quietly, your eyes widening.
He wanted to touch you so badly, to pull you against him so he could kiss you and touch you anywhere and everywhere. But he had to keep the professional veil going, even though he knew you were baiting him.
He nodded, his eyes on yours “Anything at all.”
You batted your eyelashes, trying to seduce him without boldly doing so “Is that so, sergeant?”
Sunghoon’s jaw clenched, struggling to keep his composure and hoping you weren’t able to see the effect of your presence.
He took a deep breath before replying “Yes, anything you ask of me.”
You gulped, your heart pounding in your chest as you gathered the courage to put into action your plan “I believe I need to unwind,” You stated “Any ideas?”
Sunghoon’s mind was immediately flooded with ideas, most of them very, very inappropriate for the moment. He bit his lip and tried to keep a straight face.
He considered keeping up the professional front but quickly decided against it. He was tired of forcing himself to maintain control.
“I do have a few ideas, my queen,” He said, his voice a low rumble. “Mind sharing them with me?” You asked.
Sunghoon stepped closer to you, so close that your bodies were almost touching. “My ideas may not be entirely appropriate, my queen,” He replied, “Would you like to hear them anyway?”
You closed briefly your eyes, just the brief feeling of his body near yours sending jolts of fire through your veins “I’m all ears.”
His eyes roamed over your face and body, taking in every single detail. He was practically salivating, desperate to touch you in any way possible.
Sunghoon leaned even closer, his breath now hot on your skin. “I have things I'd like to do, my queen,” He whispered in your ear. “Wicked things, to distract you from your stress.”
You let out a shaky breath, shivering from head to toe “Wicked?” You questioned.
Sunghoon felt his control slip as chuckled slowly, “Oh, very wicked, my lady.”
He brought his lips to your neck, planting soft kisses up and down your skin, taking you by surprise.
However, he kept his hands firmly by his sides, restraining himself from wandering. “I want to do things that would be highly inappropriate for a sergeant to do to his queen.”
“And who says so?” You breathed out, aching for him, your eyes flattering closed.
Sunghoon hummed against your skin, his lips moving to your collarbone. “That would be the royal laws,” He replied quietly, “Among other things.”
“I could get punished for this, you know.” He said in between kisses. “My actions are considered disrespectful.”
“I could change the law,” You replied, hooking your arms around his neck “For the night.”
His hands immediately went to your hips, grabbing you and pulling you even closer to him. “Just for the night, my queen?” He murmured against your skin, his lips trailing kisses up your jaw “I might want more than just one night.”
You chuckled lowly, “How do you know so already, sergeant?”
sunghoon’s hands moved from your hips to your thighs, caressing them through your nightgown, his thumbs tracing patterns against your skin.
Sunghoon pulled back to look at you, his eyes darkened significantly. “I'm quite sure, my queen,” He said, “The things I want to do to you are not something I can do just once.”
You shivered at his words, and the hungry way he was shamelessly looking at you. It almost seemed unreal, the polite soldier losing his cool in front of you, “How about you show me what you can do tonight, first?”
He looked at you, his gaze dark and intense, before leaning in and pressing his lips against yours in a rough kiss.
You moaned and gripped his shoulders tightly and he deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring your mouth desperately, like he was starving.
You tip toed, desperate to reach for him, to feel his lips on yours and make you forget all the duties you had.
Sunghoon chuckled against your lips, amused by your struggle to reach his height. He pulled back, a smirk on his face. “Too short for me, my queen?”
Without warning, he lifted you up with ease, and he continued the kiss.
You wrapped your legs around his waist to steady yourself, thanking yourself for not having worn an underskirt that would’ve made it impossible for you to straddle him.
Sunghoon groaned against your mouth as you wrapped your legs around his waist, the kiss becoming more desperate and rougher.
He moved his lips from your mouth and attacked your neck, leaving a trail of kisses and bites as he went. One of his hands moved from your thigh to your butt, squeezing it appreciatively.
You groaned and let your head fall back, goosebumps filling your skin in reaction to his lips.
Your fingers tried to tug his blue uniform jacket, desperate to remove any clothing between the two of you.
He gently helped you to remove it, chuckling against your neck at your eagerness.
You rocked your hips, needing to feel him, to soothe the aching sensation between your legs.
He pressed his own hips back onto yours, you could feel the proof of his desire for you, secluded in his pants.
“You have no idea how hard it is not to take you right now,” He thrust upwards, making you gasp.
“What’s stopping you, sergeant?” You asked breathlessly, you knew he was trying to restrict himself, to draw a line that shouldn’t be crossed.
But you didn’t care, all you had in mind was how good his touch was on your skin, his lips on yours and how better it would’ve been if he was inside you.
“Nothing,” Sunghoon whispered in your ear, his breath causing your body to shiver “Absolutely nothing, as long as you’re not opposed to it.”
You chuckled, looking down at yourself “Does it look like I’m against it?”
Your sweet laugh only made him madder and he kissed you, tasting your lips “No, not at all, my queen.”
“Then, take me.” You whispered on his lips, your hand caressing down his arm, still clothed from his sleeved shirt.
Sunghoon shivered under your touch, your words breaking the last strand of self-restraint he had. He grabbed your hips, suddenly carrying you to the bed and dropping you down on it.
He quickly dropped to his knees between your legs, his hands on either side of you, trapping you in “You won’t be able to walk tomorrow,” He warned.
Your hair formed a halo around your head, spread around the mattress. Your chest was heaving up and down as you replied, “That's fine by me.”
Sunghoon hummed appreciatively at the sight of you splayed out on the bed underneath him. You looked divine, like an angel sent to drive him insane.
He connected his lips to yours once again, his hands moving behind your back as you propped yourself on your elbows.
His skilled fingers worked on the laces of your corset, undoing them.
You frowned, pulling away “Experienced much?”
Sunghoon chuckled softly as he got the corset undone, pulling the fabric off you and discarding it on the floor.
He shook his head before replying, a smirk on his lips. “Just a few,” He said. “and I have been fantasising about this moment for a while now.”
“Have you?” You whispered, your hands caressing his chest, where the v-neckline of the shirt exposed it “Have you thought about me late at night, sergeant?”
Sunghoon sighed softly, his eyes closing briefly as he confessed “Yes,” He said “Every night I’ve wondered what you would taste like, how soft you were, what your moans sounded like.”
His words only made you bolder. “Have you touched yourself wishing it was me?”
Now that the corset wasn’t restricting your air capacity, it also made the dress fall down your shoulder, exposing them to him.
He leaned down and pressed gentle kisses on your skin, trailing them up to your ear “Yes, my queen. I’ve touched myself wishing it was you, craving your body and soul.”
You let out a shaky breath, the sweet sensation warming your lower stomach “Perhaps, I have done the same.”
Sunghoon groaned loudly against your skin, his body shuddering at your confession “You’ve touched yourself, thinking about me?”
You flopped back onto the mattress and hummed “Yes.”
He was completely losing it, the thought of you touching yourself, thinking about him, driving him crazy. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to regain some composure.
“Tell me more,” He rasped, his voice a low rumble. “Tell me what you've done, what you've imagined."
You bit your bottom lip, afraid to voice out your late night secrets.
“Go on, my queen.” His voice was soft and soothing, his hips just barely pressing against yours “I won’t judge you, I can’t… Can I?” He let out a quiet chuckle.
You breathed out “I’ve thought about your fingers,” You gulped “Touching me in places no one has touched before.”
“Where?” He whispered, his nose grazing your cheek “Tell me.”
Instead of speaking, you took his hand and slowly guided it down your body, you were still covered by your dress but he could still feel your core beating under his touch.
So, in one swift movement he placed his hand under your skirt, feeling just how damp your underthings were, making you gasp.
“You’re so wet for me.” He murmured, “Is this how you are around me?”
You nodded, all drops of self awareness down the drain.
Sunghoon smirked, taking your hand with his free one and placing it on the front of his pants, making you feel his hard on “That’s what you do to me.”
Amazed, you started to palm him, letting your hand feel “I do?”
“Yes,” He whispered, his hips bucking against your touch “All the time.”
“Please,” You pleaded, “I can’t take it anymore, I really need you.”
Sunghoon sighed “There’s no turning back from this, my queen..”
“Y/N.” You blurted out, eyes taking in his reaction.
Without having you to explain, he knew what you meant. You wanted him to call you by your name, crossing a boundary that would be hard to build back.
Still, he reached behind your back and unzipped your dress, slowly slipping it down.
You laid underneath it, the only thing separating you from him was your lace underwear, your upper body bare for him to see.
Sunghoon rested his chest on yours, his fingers grazing your clothed core as he whispered in your ear “Y/N.” Making you moan.
You nodded, your arms wrapping around his neck to steady yourself “Sunghoon.” You breathed back.
“Y/N..” He murmured, slipping your panties to the side and teasing your entrance with his digits “My pretty, pretty girl.”
Your eyes flickered closed, senses awakened by his single touch.
“You’ve never done this?” He questioned, gathering all your juices in his fingers, your pussy clenching around nothing.
You shook your head, your mind already a puddle of nothing “No.”
“Then I need to get you all nice and lose, mh?” Sunghoon murmured, inserting one of his fingers inside your wet folds.
You gasped, your back arching against him at the intrusion “Oh lord.”
The sensation was so new but so welcome, you had never really dared to finger yourself, your orgasms were given by clit stimulation only, so when his digit thrust into you, your body jolted with each one.
Sunghoon’s lips attached to your left breath, tongue swirling around your nipple and you thought you couldn’t feel any better until he curled his fingers and found your sweet spot, making you moan out loud.
“Shh,” He cooed, pressing one hand on your mouth while his teeth gently grazed your abused nipple. “You don’t want anyone to find out what we’re doing, don’t you?”
You were quick to shake your head, but as he thrust a second finger in your pussy, you grunted.
One of your hands went to the back of his head, your fingers knotting his perfectly combed hair “S-sunghoon.”
You bucked your hips up, needing him to stop and continue at the same time “Feels so good.”
Sunghoon chuckled lowly, both his fingers brushing against your sweet spot “I know, Y/N.” He murmured “Let me take care of you.”
You nodded mindlessly; you thought that even if he asked you to hand over the kingdom you would’ve nodded anyways.
You whimpered, your other hand digging in the flesh of his shoulders from the amount of pleasure you were feeling.
“I’ve got you.” He whispered, brushing his thumb on your bundle of nerves “Relax.”
You could feel the knot in your stomach tighten with each thrust of his fingers, just a brief pain from the intrusion making your head spin.
“Oh lord,” You breathed out, “I think I—“ Another broken whimper left your mouth.
Sunghoon nodded, understanding you and crashed his lips on yours, drowning your moans in.
Another thrust of his fingers got you falling apart under him, your whole body trembling.
It took a good couple of minutes and his soothing words to calm you down, your breath still laboured but at least you could keep your body still.
You opened your eyes back and met his own, he offered you a sweet smile “You’re perfect.” He whispered, kissing your forehead.
You smiled back at him, slowly releasing your strong grip around his neck. “This has been… amazing.”
“I’m glad, my— Y/N.” Sunghoon quickly corrected himself, “But… we don’t have to do anything more.”
You frowned, worry coating your features “Was it because you didn’t feel good? I can help—“
He was fast to shake his head. “No, of course not.” He caressed your cheek “I just don’t want to overwhelm you.”
“You will not.” You sat up, looking inside his eyes to convince him “I want it, Sunghoon, I want it with my whole body and soul.”
He closed his eyes and dropped his head, as if he physically restrained himself from reaching out to you and take you in all the ways someone can be taken.
“I want you so much it’s driving me insane,” He breathed out, resting his forehead against your chest “My sweetheart, I would love to make you mine… will you allow me to?”
You nodded “Yes, please.” You tugged at his shirt, needing him to remove it.
Sunghoon complied, tossing it to the floor as well as his trousers, leaving himself bare to you.
At first, you hadn’t understood why he was so reluctant to be intimate with you, but as soon as your eyes met his bare chest, you did.
Your breath hitched at the sight of a wide scar all across his chest, looking like half a cross.
“Sunghoon…” You whispered, your fingers trailed over it. He flinched but quickly relaxed under your gentle touch “What happened to you?”
His eyes were so vulnerable and he looked like a lost boy, not like the sergeant of a legion. “I will just say that I had a close contact with a blade, back when I was still training to become a knight.”
He gulped “I understand if I repulse you—“
“No,” You quickly took his face in your hands “No. You’re beautiful.”
He frowned, as if not understanding what would you ever find beauty in such a scar.
Seeing that he wasn’t believing you, you laid on your back and wrapped your arms around his neck, taking him down with you.
Your hand reached to pump his shaft and it was as if he died and came to life again, nothing like those nights he touched himself thinking about you, could prepare him from this.
You slowly aligned him with your folds and nodded, wanting him to make the first move.
He let out a pained sigh and gripped your waist, finally pushing in you.
You were still wet from the foreplay and as well as your cum, but it didn’t mean you didn’t feel some pain from his thickness.
He moved slowly, his breath fanning your cheeks while he brushed his nose against your skin.
“How does it feel?” Sunghoon whispered in your ear “Mh? Tell me, Y/N.”
Your skin was sweaty and hot, “So good.” You murmured back, tightening your hold on his neck “Faster, please.”
You begged him so sweetly and politely he couldn’t refuse, his hips moving against yours slightly faster “You want to make love?” He questioned “Or do you want me to take you like how I’ve wanted since I laid my eyes on you?”
“Take me.” You choked out, your eyes squeezing from the pleasure “Hard, I don’t care.”
Sunghoon circled your waist with his arm and held you tightly against him, you could feel the shadow of his scar on your chest.
His hips snapped on yours so fast even the bed started creaking, and you secretly hoped no servant was walking by to hear your show.
“Open up.” Sunghoon said and you obliged, opening your mouth.
He gathered some saliva in his mouth before spitting in yours, watching as it went down your throat.
You hummed, gulped it, tasting him “Jesus Christ.” He shook his head, his cock twitching inside of you.
“I don’t think I can last longer.” He squeezed his eyes, his fingers digging in your hips as he tried to restrain himself.
“Don’t you dare unless I cum again.” Your fingers went to stroke your bundle of nerves fast “Together.”
Sunghoon hummed, his own movements getting sloppy but never faltering as he chased his high.
“Y/N.” He groaned, one of his nails piercing your skin, adding just the right amount of pain to send you over the edge.
“Now!” You cried out, your body shaking with your second orgasm of the night.
Sunghoon let out a deep growl and emptied his seed in you, coating your clenching walls.
“So perfect.” He kissed the top of your head, his voice soothing after the intensity of the night “You’re perfect.”
He got up and took a napkin from your table, carefully cleaning your legs while also prepping kisses on your inner thighs.
You were sure that if your body wasn’t tired you would’ve mounted him.
Sunghoon reached into his clothes but your hand darted out to stop him “Stay.”
His eyes softened, pondering between staying or leaving. He opted for the first.
You had never felt happier than falling asleep with the sound of his heartbeat next to your ear, aimlessly hoping it wouldn’t be the last time.
But your relationship made it so that he was forced to peel himself away from you when he thought you were asleep, gathering his clothes and quietly slipping out of your room.
And it was the best decision, soon, you would’ve had to find a husband, make an heir for your real, rule it with all your attention.
Good thing, late night was made to unwind, and it never happened if nobody knew… did it?
1K notes · View notes
cathnospam · 22 days ago
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SFW BoyfriendAlphabet for Postimeskip!Katsuki Bakugo
MHACollege AU!Bakugo, Black girlfriend reader in some parts, fluff
A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)
Believe it or not he warms up to affection relatively fast into the relationship I see him as the type that only dated someone he has already known a while so he already had a few moments of affection with you anyway. Opening the door for you subconsciously, saving your ass from villains (or falling because you’re so clumsy), he mostly uses acts of service and quality time to express his affection. Whatever you need/want, boom you got it. Some nights he’ll just come to your dorm to relax and stay quiet for majority of the time. It’s a comfortable silence but you love it because he’ll still be silent watching you play your switch as you lay on his lap.
He may not be a lovely dovey kind of guy but his love is always shown his own way through aggressive words of affection or keeping you close beside him, squeezing your hand/thigh from time to time.
B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)
If anything he gives Childhood friends or Academic rivals to lovers so if he was already your friend as a kid it begins to blossom more throughout middle school, but you couldn’t tell because he was a little shit during that time so it’s not noticeable until high school lmao.
Bakugo as your best friend is like having a hard headed brother/son to take care of. He pretty much took YOU in declaring at a young age you were just his sidekick but here you are damn near his equal, not just in fights or power but academically and supporting one another.
Best friend bakugo is ALWAYS who you can depend on and whether he says it or not he wants you to. He wants to feel needed. Especially by you.
C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)
Bro loves to BE held. Only in private though. PDA isn’t his strong suit but when it’s just you both hold that man or he’ll turn into a lil pissy boy.
By pissy I mean giving you the silent treatment or acting passive aggressive until you take charge and grab him into your arms. It’s kinda cute.
He will be more cuddly when he’s tired or feeling uneasy, he still has his panic attacks and moments of overstimulation so he’ll actually hunt you down and if you’re in your dorm in your bed he will move whatever is on your lap and spread your thighs to lay on your chest or tummy just to get away from the world for a second. He squeezes very hard so be prepared.
D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)
Bakugo doesn’t give “casual” or even likes the term “situationship” you guys are either together and going to get married or nothing. He does in fact date to marry because he doesn’t want to consistently waste his own time with multiple people every few months. He’s either ganna be married with his one and only or nobody at all so you’re his first, last, and only.
He’s a pro hero in college but he always gave househusband. Whenever he comes to your dorm he will tidy up, throwing a few “Why is there so much shit everywhere.” When all there is is a few empty bottles on the floor. It’s cute and sweet how he makes sure you’re clean.
He will cook for you, and has no problem doing it every single time he visits, he loves to show off his talents to you, so shut up, sit and look pretty as he makes you some of your favorite meals. BONUS points if it’s a home/childhood meal he’s never heard of and you teach it to him.
E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)
I believe if any reason bakugo would break up with you it’d be for a valid reason, I.e. you cheating. If he found out you cheated he’d of course upset, angry, but more betrayed. It takes a lot for him to gain that level of trust in a person and for all those moments of vulnerability and love and laughter with you to be thrown away will cut him deep to the point he wouldn’t ever focus on a relationship again. It’s painful for him to know that the thoughts of once sharing his whole world with you are now a painful faded memory .
F = Fiance(How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)
He doesn’t seem like the type to have super long engagements, at most 1-2 years and that’s even pushing it. He has money for days and Bakugo is a man that if he wants it he will get it so the moment he decides you’re going to be his wife(which is most likely after the first date) he is preparing to propose. He does not mind being a husband.
G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)
Now I’m not going to say he’s just a complete soft baby boy when he’s with you. Not necessarily, He can still be brash with his words, but he never once harmed you physically. Ever. Down to how he grabs your arm when rescuing you.
A few examples of gentleness he expresses is when you lay on or beside him, his scared hand rubs against your cheeks and sides, he kisses your forehead every once in a while and even before he gets up to grab you both a snack. Bakugo tends to examine your body after a fight, even a simple run in with low life villains he rushes towards you after, he has been doing it since high school, after sparing, training, whatever he caresses your face (a few times a big rough than usual if he is impatient) and critiques how you did as if he was a teacher, but all the while he’s praying in his head thanking God He kept you safe.
H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)
You initiate 90% of the hugs, and He grew to like YOUR hugs, but he says he doesn’t. When you first hugged him he instinctively pushed you away, but you didn’t let go. For a few years he never hugged you back because hugs wasn’t a common thing for him and they were awkward, but one day after another fight with the league of villains he seen you, bloodied up and limping towards him he finally grabbed you and surrounded you in his sweaty arms. You nearly couldn’t breathe for how tightly he hugged you, but you felt your body relax, mostly because you fell unconscious on his shoulder for a second. He didn’t let you go until you were on a hospital bed.
Bakugo’s hug feel safe and warm, one arm around your waist and another holding the back of your head. Almost like a cradles you. He never does a regular side hug with you it’s either a bear hug or nothing else.
I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)
Does NOT say it a lot . It’s HARD, his actions show it so much though that it’s not to the point where you question, but he does say it at the most random or intimate times.
The first time he said it was when you both were taking a shower together and you were scrubbing his back and playfully said “I love you, jackass.” Mid conversation and he was in a sligghttllyyy good mood so he chuckled and said “I love you too, dumbass.” You knew if you pointed it out he’d get red as a tomato so you tried not to make a big deal, but bakugo felt your pause briefly and knew he finally said the world you been wanting him to say for the longest.
He’ll say it after and during sex a few times, and before going to work. Instead of a goodbye it’s “I love you, see you later.”
Because he never wants to experience telling you goodbye
J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)
His jealously is loud, but not verbally. It’s with glares and action. He trust you he just don’t trust other men. It’s not OFTEN but it’s enough that when it happens you never forget it.
He usually gets jealous when another guy is too close to you for comfort and makes you anything above happy. Why the hell are you happy with them? You have Katsuki Bakugo as your man he’s the only one that should make you happy?
He’s a little delusional in the head but it’s okay.
K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)
Goodness his kisses are slutty. It’s not even on purpose the dick just loves dominating everything. He tends to always initiate when you both are alone, and brace yourself because when he kisses you he goes all out. He has a habit of staring at the location as to where he wants to kiss you, usually when you’re rambling he stares at your lips, almost annoyed liked until you stop and that’s when he dives in, it’s almost like he is pushing you from the force but he slowly moves his mouth in tandem with yours, by default he uses his tongue a lot. He is also a buyer to prepared for little nips at your bottoms lip. He barely allows either of your to breathe so you are usually the one to pull back first which leads to a pissy Blondie, but it’s not even a second until he pulls you back in by your neck. You can always feel his thumb rubbing your throat or cheek as he nearly swallows your tongue, his lips are always soft and his breath super minty or sweet from a candy he popped in his mouth earlier.
He loves your lips. He does, but next to that you always catch him kissing your shoulder. Bakugo will ends his days or just pause
L = Little ones (How are they around children?)
…I’m sure you all know how he is with kids.
M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)
Okay so it depends if he has to work or not so let’s start off on his off days; for one, He isn’t an actual early bird. I know a lot of people say he is because he went to sleep early but if you all remember his own mom pointed out he wakes up around noon, so if it’s his day off he is snuggled in bed with you for while drifting in and out of sleep. Legs and arm stretched over your body OR you’re on top of him, if he wakes before you he will place you comfortably on the middle of the bed, a small forehead kiss and head to clean the room a bit. He often cooks breakfast while you sleep so many mornings you wake to his famous pancakes and bacon. Casual mornings are quiet, nonverbal communication between you both with him giving you a glass of water and OJ, sometimes letting you taste test different pancakes flavors he has made, and comfortably eating on the couch watching the news/yall favorite show.
If he has to work he usually sets out a bottled water for you and have your coffee already brewing to your liking. It sucks to wake up to a cold bed, but when he gets home he makes it up to you.
N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)
A mix of settling down but in the most chaotic way. Surprisingly some days Bakugo wants to stay up late and you go to bed with him, so you try to convince him to just watch TV in your shared room. Some nights he working out and you would rather lay with him and be lazy. Some nights it’s vise versa. However it’s always ended with cuddling and relaxing in bed while eating the most unhealthy snacks. Bakugo doesn’t like to admit it but he definitely gained a few pounds since dating you due to this.
O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)
I believe the first time he opened up to you was after the war. He had his few moments of TRYING to be more vocal about himself and his feelings towards you, but his heart softened more after he woke up from the hospital. It was when you were helping him during his time in rehab and he was making such fast process you told him how proud of him you were. That’s when he finally spewed as much of what he could out before shutting down a gain.
He told you about how he felt about you, how he thought about you in the moments you weren’t there, the way he’d always hope you come back sooner rather than later when you left, he spoke about his insecurities with you and even though it wasn’t worded THE BEST, you understood. Since then he became more comfortable with telling you certain “secrets” he kept from you. How he likes hearing you laugh, how he enjoys watching you switch up your hairstyle every other week, he especially loves when you wear braids.
P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)
….its bakugo. He usually has just enough patience with you that’s noticeable to others, but he still gets irritated. It’s kind of his default mood at this point. With you though it’s somewhat different, he doesn’t scream at you in genuine anger instead he pouts, grumbles even like a hardheaded child. Sometimes even give you the silent treatment, but it doesn’t last long when you baby him.
Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)
Yall talk about Deku being the observant one, have you seen his bestie Bakugo???? He remembers a lot and He’s nosey too! He remembers things you don’t even notice, like how your face grimace when you eat something too sour, or the look in your eye when something clearly annoys you but you don’t say anything. Bakugo pays attention to body language above anything else about you. He subconsciously uses it as mental notes to learn more about you. It’s kind of attractive in its own way.
R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)
He wouldn’t tell you but he loved yall first date. It was in a small village you two happen to find after driving to the original date place but his car ran out of gas and their gas station was the nearest one. You wanted to walk around because it was so pretty and even had a sunflower field to visit. He stole a few pictures of you while you wasn’t looking in the field and you looked ethereal to him. He has it as his lockscreen.
It was his favorite moment because you really showed your true self around him, your corny jokes, yapping about your latest fixation to him. It was endearing. But most of all it was just you both. In a place nobody knew you both so he felt more comfortable himself. Bakugo even remembers the old lady that called you both a beautiful husband and wife and you didn’t correct her. He didn’t either.
S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)
You have a personal guard dog with this one. Pro hero AND naturally strong? Girl you’re winning. He literally has told his classmates he will protect them so what makes you think he wouldn’t go even further for you? You can quite literally turn off your mind when you are with him. He got you.
Bakugo doesn’t necessarily need protection but he likes to know you have his back too, villains, fan girls, or even tripping over his feet you’re right there to help him. And he loves that.
T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)
At first he would just do whatever you wanted to do honestly. But if it’s true he reads romance mangas then he definitely would try to recreate some dates with you he has read.
U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)
If you had a boyfriend before him he’d probably have an insecurity about it. Bakugo would constantly compare himself to your ex even if you never speak about him. So if you can. Try to reassure him every single time that he is not your ex and that’s exactly one of the many things you love about him.
V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)
Bakugo genuinely did not care for his looks until you kept giving him compliments. He knew he wasn’t UGLY but hated to be called pretty. You however stroked his ego, you called his lips soft so he began doing more lip scrubs in his routine, you talked about how good he smelled naturally he began to buy more hoodies for you to steal after he wore em, you talked about how nice his arms are he started walking around your dorm shirtless and wearing more sleeveless shirts, every compliment you gave him was something he adored…he may have a praise kink.
W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)
He wouldn’t admit it but he would feel empty if you left him. I hc one of his fears is being alone after he has already has someone to be with which is probably why he didn’t want any interest in dating until you came along. He didn’t want to grow a bond that would eventually fail, but knowing you he has no intention on leaving you so you can’t leave him.
X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)
Bakugo was born in Germany, but moved to Japan when he was one, growing up his mother would switch from speaking English/Japanese/German so Bakugo could be bilingual. And he is he can fluently speak all three.
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lilahisntsadanymore · 1 year ago
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Growing up with a deatheater father doesn't teach you much about emotions, so when Theo finds himself developing an infatuation with a muggle-born, he thinks she gave him a love potion.
Pairing: Theo Nott x granger!fem!reader
Words count: 1.9k
Warnings: jealous Harry
There is a 2nd part!! <3
≫ ──── ««•◦ ✪ ◦•»» ──── ≪
Unveiled Desires
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It was strange to him. So strange how he went from mocking, annoying and occasionally bullying her every step she takes to secretly wanting her. Wanting to have her, or even needing her.
He didn't know how or when it happened, but one day he realized she was constantly in his head. It creeped up on him in small steps and eventually he had developed an infatuation for the girl.
Of course nobody knew about it, Theo wouldn't dare telling anyone. He just kept with his antics, hoping the obsession will somewhat disappear one day. Unfortunately, the more he tried to get rid of this feeling, the more he gave it power, the more it grew.
But he couldn't be with her. He couldn't be with a mudblood.
But he wanted to be with her. The more he thought about it, the less he cared about the blood status. He cursed at himself for these thoughts. Raised by a deatheater father, he would get disowned for dating anyone who wasn't a pureblood.
"Granger, can I talk to you for a second?" A question left his mouth as he approached the Golden Trio. Who was better to talk to about Y/n than her older sister?
The three Gryffindors looked at Theo as if he wasn't good in the head. Just casually wanting to have a chat, a normal chat, with someone outside of his social circle. Pretty unusual for a Slytherin.
"What is it?" Harry asked protectively.
"I was talking to Granger. I need to talk privately."
Hermione looked at Harry and Ron, exchanging suspecting glances. Eventually she spoke, "Alright, but make it quick."
"Great, let's go." Theo started walking, but Hermione stood in her place.
"Where are you going?"
"Somewhere they," he gestured to Harry and Ron, "aren't gonna eavesdrop."
Hermione crossed her arms on her chest, a knowing expression on her face.
Theo raised his hands, "It's not a trap again, I swear."
The girl sighed and walked after her rival.
Hermione and Theodore weren't fond of each other not only because of their houses and their blood statuses, but also because they were academic rivals. Both of them were extremely competitive. Since first year they aspired to be better than one another in pretty much everything.
"Can we stop already?" The girl asked. "I'm pretty sure they won't ear us from here."
"Alright, alright." Theo agreed. "But I need you to promise me you won't tell anybody about it."
"Why me? Why would you trust a Gryffindor with keeping a secret for you?"
Theo lowered his voice to a whisper, "Because it's about your sister."
"What?!" Hermione's voice was the opposite of a whisper. "What have you done to her?!"
The boy gestured telling her to lower her voice. "No, I didn't do anything. She has done...something."
"What on Earth could that possibly be?" A little more quiet, but still unpleasantly surprised, she decided to listen to him.
One last time, Theo looked around to make sure there's nobody there who could be a witness to what he was about to say.
"She used some spell on me." He accused. "Or put something in my food, my drink."
Hermione scoffed with laughter. "You must be joking. You bully her for whole five years, but one time she pays you back for it, it's an issue?"
"Not like that." He took a second to gather his thoughts. "Granger, do you remember how we learnt about amortentia few weeks ago? I think Y/n gave it to me."
Hermione started at the boy for a moment and then burst out with laughter. Y/n wasn't the issue, there was no way a fifth year would be able to make amortentia. Not even Y/n Granger.
Theodore felt annoyed and offended by Hermione's reaction. He looked at her with disgust. "What is so funny to you about it, mu-, Granger?"
Noticing how he almost called her a slur, her expression immediately became serious. "Seriously? You know what, deal with it by yourself. I don't even know why you're telling me all of this."
"Why? Because you have to talk to her, tell her to do something about it! Tell her to stop it!"
Hermione got a brilliant idea.
"You know, I've heard professor Slughorn had a remedy for amortentia."
"Yeah, and I'll end up in the hospital wing like Weasley."
"It was poisoned mead, not the amortentia cure itself. You can ask him to make one from the ingredients in the classroom."
"I will," Theo scoffed, "look at you being useful for the first time in your life."
Without another word, Hermione walked away. "Boys..." She muttered to herself.
"Don't tell anyone I told you this!"
≫ ──── ««•◦ ✪ ◦•»» ──── ≪
"What?! He likes me?!" Y/n asked with blush on her face. "Theodore Nott likes me? The boy that has been bullying me for the past five years?"
"And the thinks it's because you gave him amortentia." Hermione giggled.
Y/n wouldn't ever think that he could be into her and the whole story that her sister had told her was simply unbelievable. But Hermione had no business in lying to her very own little sister, especially not about that.
"Does anyone else know about this?"
"Not yet, but I talked him into asking Slughorn for the cure! I suppose he'll do this tomorrow after class, as soon as possible."
"Who are you and what have you done to my sister?"
The girls were sitting alone in the common room and as Y/n laughed, Ron and Harry walked in.
"What are you two laughing about?" Harry asked, ready to hear that story.
"Can I tell them?" Hermione looked at Y/n. The younger Granger nodded. "Nott likes Y/n."
The girls and Ron laughed, meanwhile Harry stood there with his lips in a thin line, far away from laughing.
"The best part is," Hermione continued, "he thinks Y/n gave him amortentia!"
"What?" Harry spoke eventually, his voice a bit more surprised than it should be. "Y/n, did you give amortentia to Nott?"
"No, why would you accuse me of this?!" The youngest girl defended herself. "Is it that unbelievable that he can fancy me?"
"I mean... You're a muggleborn... And-"
"And what?! Does that mean I'm not worthy of that? We don't know him, maybe he doesn't believe in this whole blood purity thing."
"He does. That's why he hasn't asked you out. And he never will. Because they're all the same."
Y/n's eyes became a little glossy, the tears ready to start flowing anytime. "Are they, though? And you're saying this. You, whose godfather was Sirius Black."
"Sirius was different!"
"We don't know because we don't know what Theo is like!"
"Theo? It was Nott for the past few years that he was tormenting you," Harry put an emphasis on the word bullying, "now he fancies you and he becomes Theo?"
"I would actually give him a chance. It's not his fault that he was born into a blood purity obsessed family."
"Don't you think that's a little pathetic? Running into his hands the moment you find out he might fancy you meanwhile you had chances to date...other Gryffindors."
"Pathetic? You call me pathetic?"
"I didn't call you pathetic, I said what you do is-"
A sound of a slap filled the room, but the following silence spoke even louder. Y/n looked Harry in the eyes, a light red mark on his cheek that her hand left.
Harry could see and sense that it was too much, he said unnecessary words. He regretted them, but he just couldn't stop them from coming out.
The Golden Trio watched Y/n run upstairs. She was so glad nobody else was in the bedroom yet.
≫ ──── ««•◦ ✪ ◦•»» ──── ≪
"Excuse me, professor," Theo walked up to Slughorn after the class on the following day.
All the other students were slowly exiting the room, Harry's eyes fixed on the Slytherin standing by the teacher's desk.
"Yes, Theodore?" Slughorn asked. "Do you have some more bright insights you'd like to share with me?" He was clearly happy to have this conversation.
"I actually need help, professor."
The man's expression dropped. "Yes? Do you have a problem?"
"I'm worried that I've been given amortentia."
Slughorn's eyes widened. He was surprised or even shocked. "Are you sure? I remember seeing other people under the influence of several love potions and you don't quite match the criteria."
"There's this girl who I can't stop thinking about... I suspect she has given it to me."
"Who that might be?"
Theo waited until all the other students exit the classroom before he said the name.
"Y/n Granger."
Y/n stopped in her tracks just as he was about to enter the potions classroom. She was about to show the teacher a part of her project, wanting to consult the texts she has written. Instead, she stopped and decided to listen to the conversation.
"Ah, she's one of the best students in her year," Slughorn said proudly, "but I assure you - she wouldn't do that to you."
"How can you be sure, professor?"
"Well, could you describe your symptoms, Theodore?"
"Whatever I do, Y/n is on my mind," the boy admitted, "I can't eat, I can't sleep, I zone out thinking about her. It's not normal, I've never experienced it before."
The teacher gave his student a sympathetic smile. "My dear boy, you might be experiencing the actual feeling of being in love."
"What? And how could it have been caused? Was it a love potion, after all? Maybe a spell?"
"It's a part of muggle science, biology. The chemicals in your brain cause it and it's not something you can control. It happens when it happens. A truly beautiful feeling."
Theo's mouth twisted into a dissatisfied grimace. "Is there anything I can do about it?"
"You can talk to the girl about it, for example," Slughorn looked at the door and shouted, "come in, Y/n!"
Y/n cursed to herself in her thoughts. How could he know she was there?
The girl walked in shyly, holding a paper in her hands. "I wanted to show you my paper, professor," the girl spoke, "if there's anything you think I should change or... anything."
As the girl handed the paper to the teacher, she looked at Theo. They stood dangerously close to each other. The silence between the was so loud, Y/n was praying for the teacher to say something. Anything.
"Amazing, Mrs Granger," he spoke eventually, "although the Draught of Living Dead is an extremely difficult potion to make. I'm glad you're so ambitious, but I'd suggest you get help from someone more experienced."
"I'm pretty sure I can do it on my own." Y/n assured.
"Maybe Mr. Nott here could help you. The sixth year has been just learning about this potion, actually. Theodore, would you be so kind and help Mrs Granger?"
Suddenly, Theo's gaze somewhat softened. There was no more disgust in his eyes. When he stood so close to Y/n, he wondered why did he act the way he did. Why did he do all the mean things to her. Maybe he had always liked her, but didn't want to admit it, even to himself alone.
"Yes, sure," he said, "I can help."
Y/n felt happy. For some reason, she didn't dislike Theo for all the things he did. She secretly always liked him, he was attractive, and she would even sometimes daydream about the day he would finally talk to her like a normal person. Maybe the day has finally come.
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comicaurora · 3 months ago
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Do you think the main characters (in aurora)’s fatal flaws can be summed up in one word? If so, what are they?
Yes, but most of my answers only register as flaws if you squint. I think characters are most interesting if their admirable qualities are also what gets them in trouble, and anything becomes a flaw in the right circumstances.
Kendal is selfless. He barely registers himself as a person, so his acts of compassion frequently come at a severe personal cost. He has a massive blind spot for how much it hurts others when he hurts himself. He is kind and lacking in ego, but he has zero ability to advocate for himself. He defines himself by what he can do for others, and is only barely beginning to understand that he can do things for himself.
Alinua is paralyzed. She wants to heal and she does not want to hurt, and she's wrestling with a massive, terrifying power and responsibility that allows her to do both. She spent so long terrified of hurting anyone that she overthinks her actions unless she's running on pure adrenaline and impulsiveness can take over for her.
Erin is independent. He's quicker than everyone around him, and he has no patience for anyone who he sees as slowing him down. He is tremendously powerful and very intelligent, but he has absolutely no ability to work in a team, because that means trusting others to execute his ideas flawlessly, and from his angle, nobody can do that reliably except for him. It's not a logical conclusion, but he can always find a reason for why his plans were foiled by other people messing them up. Erin would love to be helped and rescued. He just knows nobody can, and nobody will.
Falst is loyal. Falst is also unbelievably lonely and, like Erin, has cultivated extreme self-reliance in the face of neglect. Falst loves being part of a team, but has absolutely no ability to trust that he is safe in it. He hasn't been wanted anywhere in a very long time. He's too proud to say that, and he's very angry at the part of himself that is hurt by that, which makes him very volatile in very specific contexts where that part of him is exposed to the air.
Dainix is insightful. He reads people too clearly, but has very little understanding of how much it's okay to plainly say about what other people are thinking and feeling. Where he's from, thanks to the magical influence of Fire, the seat of emotion, everyone can to a certain extent feel the vibes and temperature of the room and everyone is mostly on the same page about it. He is utterly unprepared for people like Falst who become extremely defensive at any insight that prods a sensitive spot, and he's pretty much hopeless at performing any deceit more complex than a half-truth.
Tess is free. She's the ideal of wanderlust, and living her truth is good for her, but it makes her fundamentally unreliable for everyone around her. She cannot be comfortable in stability, and she is ultimately following a selfish goal of pure self-determination that makes it impossible for her to stay anywhere long. She is disconnected from her surroundings and the people who love her. She doesn't like thinking of her loved ones as tethers holding her down, but if she stays anywhere too long, that's what they become.
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deerspherestudios · 7 months ago
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Small(or not) what if scene 👀 What if Mushroom Boy didn't have the ability to hypnotize people, but just read their minds???
Like an AU where his powers are different? I'll indulge since the scenario does seem interesting! 🍄
If Mychael didn't have hypnosis but instead read minds under cut:
Mychael's hypnosis is pretty much his main go-to for survival. As a pacifist (or at least he tries to be) the fastest way to de-escalate a hostile situation is throwing a hypnosis blanket over the threat and make them docile/non-aggressive. If it has a mind he can manipulate why go about it any other way? And keep in mind it's a one-way street. He can feed thoughts into your head but the only way he knows it's working is you reacting externally like with your words and actions.
But suppose he can't manipulate minds but only read them? I think it would shift his entire personality. Knowing people's true intent and what they think of him would change his survival behavior. Instead of placating the threat directly and just force people to accept his presence (albeit under mind control), he'd have to adapt on the spot more often.
He'd have to say and act in whatever way that would earn others' trust enough so they won't hurt him, or just turn and run if he feels like they're out for his blood. He'd be more manipulative, less open and honest, and wear several more masks than he already does now. He'd never give away that he knows what you're thinking at any time, since that's basically his only tool to survive so he wouldn't give up that information easily.
And I imagine after hearing "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT" over and over and over every single time he meets someone new, he'd just accept nobody wants him at all. So would he even begin to yearn for company? Absolutely not.
This was a really fun scenario so I made a quick doodle just highlighting their main mindsets:
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homunculus-argument · 10 months ago
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Random character dynamic: A ruler of a massive, mighty empire, and his pet wizard who foretells the future for him. The emperor has absolute, unwavering trust in the wizard's abilities, and never makes a desicion before consulting the wizard first. The emperor's wizard is of no noble birth nor formally educated, and the way they'll casually break courtly etiquette and speak like a peasant instead of a scholar is used to highlight their power - this is a true wizard, with powers natural born, not someone raised and trained to act like one.
Everyone knows the story of how the emperor encountered his wizard. The emperor's party was on a hunting trip in a distant region, and while going out to pursue some unusual game, they encountered a shepherd who warned them to not go this way, a storm will rise and kill the whole party. The emperor and his party ignored this warning and went after the beast they were hunting. A horrible storm came down on them and killed the whole party, save for the emperor.
As the sole survivor of this calamity that appeared out of nowhere, that nobody could have seen coming, the emperor suddenly remembered the shepherd, and realised that hold on, that strange hermit had foreseen this. Had we heeded their warning and not pursued the game, there would have been no storm. So he goes back to the village, finds the shepherd and goes holy shit are you a fucking wizard. And since only a true wizard would deny being a wizard, the emperor takes them with him.
Most of the things the emperor consults the wizard for are matters of common sense, that the wizard learns to weave into flattery - saying that the emperor's utterly idiotic idea would be a masterful move in any other time and place, but there is wisdom in knowing when to bide his time. Other members of the court and clergy start slipping the wizard requests of things that they should herd the emperor into doing, or not doing.
When the wizard admits to the other advisors that they don't actually have any kind of power of divination, they're told that the court already knows. This is how it has always been. The line of the emperors knows that the rulers who heed the warnings of their royal wizards tend to prosper, and the ones who ignore their sages or neglect to have one at all will fail.
This has been the case ever since the one emperor whose wizard had warned him to not let his wife drink so much while pregnant, or his heir's reign would be fated to be disastrous. The emperor ignored the warning and 30 years later, the aforementioned heir struggled to rule before being assasinated by his cousin, who took over the throne and whose line has ruled ever since, adamantly drilling it into every new generation to not ignore their wizards.
One might not be able to convince an emperor about things like "local peasants know how to predict the weather patterns of where they live" or "fetal alcohol syndrome is bad for your child", but they sure can believe in fate, and those with the power of divination.
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