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transpat · 3 years

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we weren't shown a lot of how pran was after the separation and so all we talk about is pat turned cold and harsh without pran in his orbit but i think pran's reaction after the kiss was the most telling of how he suffered during that period.

anyone else would be elated their crush of years liked them back but that incident became such a deeply seated trauma for him, his immediate response was to push pat away. he didn't think that they could lie, like he always has, that they could pretend, like they've always had to, that they could hide. he's such a thoughtful, rational person, he keeps his wits about him even when they run away, but in that moment where pat tries to change the natural of their relationship again, he doesn't think he runs away.

bc they've done this before. they tried being smth other than rivals, smth more than strangers. they tried to be just friends. and they were so violently separated. his mother reacted so drastically to him simply sharing a stage w pat. what if she caught him kissing pat just then? what if she noticed the meaning behind their shared gaze? what if found out pat loved him, what then? he lost pat once, he couldn't do it again, especially not now that he knew pat liked him.

i'd say he thought pushing him away would be better bc at least pat would remain in his life even if it was at distance. thou tbh i doubt he was thinking at all. when he ran from pat he wasn't thinking. when pat was banging at his door his thoughts were racing, incoherent strings of memories and emotions. when pat tried talking to him the next day, when pat came to his house, when he gave his guitar away, he wasn't thinking. he was on autopilot, the scar from three years ago reopened and all he was doing was trying to staunch the bleeding. the wound on his heart said: if u let him any closer, u'll lose him forever. and all pran was doing was tending to it, pushing pat as far as he could so he wouldn't have to lose him.

then pat wouldn't give up and followed him all the way to the beachside. there, removed from his mother and having had time to stop the bleeding, pran's head started to clear. there, alone w pat, he finally had space to breathe, to think. after he's pushed pat w all his might, after he's ignored him pretending pat was this insignificant little thing, after he's hurt pat as much as he's hurting, and pat still hadn't given up on him, pran slows down. the autopilot is shutdown, unrequired when he's alone w this boy, he slows down and finally thinks.

that's what u see him do during their impromptu date. bit-by-bit, pran is shedding his guard. bc last night he used his mightiest weapon, he drove it into pat's chest as deep as he possibly could, he thought now pat will give up, now pat will hate him, now things will go back to normal. but pat pops up again the next morning, unrelenting, unfaltering, unchanged. and pran's so relieved he loosens up subconsciously.

then he realizes that he can't do that either. he can't make pat hate him, bc that too would be losing pat forever. he can't take a step forward and its too late to go back, so he calculates his chances and lets pat in little by little. still scared of taking a plunge, still hesitant of rushing into a 'doomed' relationship, he instead uncovers the window to his soul. lets pat see. that he's not indifferent, that he's hurting as much as he hurt him, that he's just scared, petrified. pat understands what this is about and asks him if he hates him for the transfer. pran who knows how frightening the notion of pat hating him is to him says he was only angry.

after that pran continues to let him in, lets pat amble closer. they return back to their previous dynamic, but pran also lets him see he too is disappointed they didn't get to room together. pat obv knew who was the reason he didn't get beat up by the architecture gang that night. and when pat grabbed his arm, pran stayed w him.

now that he was thinking he had his doubts. how true pat's feelings were, how deeply they ran, what about ink? pat answered the former two w his actions and the latter w his words. he offered the bet, and now that pran was thinking he understood what this was about. understood what this meant for pat. for someone who always gets things done immediately to wait for pran, to offer him safe ground pran could back out of anytime, to hold back the confession he's clearly dying to spit. pran understands what it all means, erases any lingering doubts he had about pat's feelings. he needs what pat's offering rn so he takes it, but when finally takes a leap and changes the relationship, pran doesn't look back once.

#bad buddy #bad buddy series #patpran #pran parakul #pranpat #i think a pran w/o pat was probably less thoughtful and more impulsive #worrying about consequences is only when pat is involved #its only then that his mother acts up #all he has to do is steer clear of the too things his mother doesn't like (pat and music the only things pran loves)#and he doesn't have to overthink anything he does anymore #he can get into fights w/o worrying what comes next #tell his parents he met pat again bc pat's changed and he doubts they'll get closer this time #relies more heavily on others decisions and opinions instead of forming his own #then pat and him are close again and he has to worry #he has to be careful so he doesn't lose him again #pran's happy to scheme its fun for him #he stops sitting back and fitting the role his mother demands #and starts formulating his own plans #they both become passive participants of their own lives w/o the other #bc their parents raised them such that they only had to work to complete the other #but bc their parents can't stand the thought of them being together #they again transform into active roles to sneak behind their back #to keep their families and themselves happy #thoughts.txt #sorry this wasn't supposed to be this long i just can't shut up

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sontrini · 3 years

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✘ MICHAEL AFTON SFW ALPHABET ✘

a/n: !! michael! ik most of the fandom loves him (at least from what I’ve seen?? 😭) and u know what. so do i. i decided this would be a fun first post cuz it has a lot of space for content!

you can imagine him as pre-scooper michael or if u want u can do post too.

p.s I forgot that I could literally just call him Mike until half way through lmao

warnings: mentions of food, angst on some letters, implications and some elaborations of trauma (mike’s), self destructive habits

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Michael isn’t really the best in terms of verbal affection. He leans more toward subtle actions - hooking his pinky with yours and not saying anything about it, giving you snacks with no context and leaning on you whenever you’re near enough for the two of you to press against each other’s sides.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Generally, Michael doesn’t...make friends. You’d definitely have to be the first to approach, or both of you would somehow have to be forced to interact. He can come off as a bit rude and cold, but the more you get to know him the more willing he is to really interact and listen to you. Michael doesn’t really know how to care for people (not after spending so many years alone) but he tries. He likes asking you about your day and sending you things he thinks you’d like.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Michael likes cuddling to an extent - he has his off days, but for the most part he appreciates feeling soft blankets pressed against his back, and your body heat seeping into his from where you’re curled into his arms and laying against his torso. He finds himself running his hands up and down your back, an action he remembers faintly from his childhood.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Michael doesn’t know how to cook - between a bad home life as a child and no one to teach him once he grew up, he’s spent his life depending on cup ramen and microwave-able foods. Occasionally he’ll have to put something together, but he couldn’t name the last time he had anything made from scratch. He’s also never really been present enough in his own home to make much of a mess - every room beside his bedroom is decorated blandly, dust settling on them. Still, with you in his life he learns to try harder. He cleans his spaces dutifully, and helps you with the dishes when you cook. He’s never imagined having a family, to afraid to be like his father, though with you showing him how to really care for someone, he thinks having more people to care for and coddle wouldn’t be so bad.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Michael coming to terms with your relationship not working out is a brutal and silent inner-fight. You find him growing distant, now and bitter whenever he interacted with you. He became almost uncaring about your feelings, avoiding you at all costs and acting like he couldn’t hear you when he came home. When he finally tells you that you two are over, you’re not surprised. Still, you’re hurt. he could’ve saved you the heart ache. You understand it was his walls coming back up, trying to protect him after he realized he was unhappy, but you can’t help but feel bitter. You didn’t deserve feeling like nothing but dirt because he had a realization. When you finally move out, that’s it. You never hear from him again. It’s like the time you two spent together was gone, insignificant.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Given his father and watching his parents when he was smaller, he doesn’t like what marriage means. As he gets older he of course realizes that his family wasn’t exactly healthy, but the point still stands. Marriage does not equal happiness to him, and he can’t help but be skittish about it. He understands that it is an important symbol to most, but he cant bring himself to officially marry you, as much as he loves you. His fear of becoming his father is irrational, he knows, but just thinking about it sends him into a dark place.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Mike is as gentle as he can be physically. He’s afraid of hurting you, so his touch is always light and caring, despite his heavily scarred and calloused hands. Emotionally, he has a hard time understanding what boundaries mean at first. You’ll have to be very clear to him on what he can and cant do/ say. He’d hate to hurt you, but emotional vulnerability is something he hasn’t practiced in a very long time. It’s a process, just like every other relationship.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

HUGS! Mike at first is super hesitant, barely touching you in fear of you flinching or pushing him away. He quickly learns that your response is just to melt into him, wrapping your own arms around him and shoving your head into the crook of his neck or into his chest. he doesn’t initiate often, but he gladly complies when you open your arms and come closer to him. He likes hugging you close, feeling your heartbeat thrum against his body and letting his hands soak up your warmth.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

He thinks it more than he ever says it. The first time he says it to himself is when you smile nervously down at him, having woken him up while trying to drape a blanket over him from where he had fallen asleep on your couch. He’s too groggy to understand your whispered apologies and explanations, he only pulls you to him gently and hugs you to him, forcing you to meld against him. You still your flustered twitching quickly, and as he sinks back into the couch, eyelids heavy, he registers the unfamiliar warmth in his chest. He really does love you.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Michaels jealousy stems from insecurity. It doesn’t happen often, but sometimes he’ll catch himself grumbling about how much better you must like the friend you’re out with right now. When you get home, he hugs you and pouts silently, moping in your embrace.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Oh he’s an absolute sucker for kisses. He likes pressing soft pecks on the crown of your head or on your forehead, mostly while hugging you. Pecks on the cheek still fluster him, and he likes slow, soft presses against each other’s lips when you two have the time to lounge. He’s very soft for kisses pressed to his shoulder area, relishing in the warm short press of your mouth on his shoulder blades.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Mike hasn’t really been around kids ever since his siblings...passed. He doesn’t trust himself around them, either. He doesn’t want to hurt them, god no, but he also hadn’t meant to hurt others. He learns to indulge them, though. As awkward as he is, he tries his best to make children feel safe around him when he can.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Michael, as a result of heavy insomnia, is not a morning person OR a night person. On the nights he does sleep, he wakes up horribly ; it takes him so long to blink the sleep out of his eyes, and even longer to process that he’s alive and has things to do.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Michael doesn’t really like night-time. To dark for him to know where everything is, but he can’t afford to keep the lights on all night either. He often does not sleep, but nights with you go differently. While you can’t do much about his Insomnia and night terrors, you can keep him company while he calms down, and bring him his comfort items.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Michael most definitely takes some time to open up. He’s an acquaintance for a VERY long time, until he starts to open up just a bit more. He offers facts about himself easier, lets himself lose tension in his body around you, etc.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Mike doesn't get angry easy. He gets peeved, and he doesn't have the LONGEST of fuses, but when he does get angry it's cold. His face goes blank, voice tight and void of any emotion. His room is littered with plaster stains from having to repair holes he'd punched in the walls, but he had never once hurt you. Those were old anyway - results of rages he had when he was newly an adult, hurting and with no way to make it stop.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Mike does not know a single allergy of yours or your blood type but he knows your favorite club penguin puffle.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Mike often thinks about the first birthday you two celebrated together. You had been late, the clock striking 9 pm and no sign of you. It had worried him, but he consoled himself as best as he could. It was raining; there was probably some traffic, he reasoned. When he finally hears keys jingling from outside of the front door, he swings it open before you could wiggle the key into the slot. Your smile was tight, lips thinned sheepishly. You were absolutely drenched, coat heavy on your shoulders and sneakers glistening with rainwater.

“Hey, Mikey. I know i'm late, I'm sorry. There was so much left at work and then I got a notification on my phone so i had to go to the store and then there were like four car crashes so i took the longest route home in the rain," You huffed, clearly annoyed. Mike listened, relief flooding through him. You were shivering, but over-all safe and that's all he really wanted.

"But, anyway,"You continued, shrugging off your soaking backpack and letting it slump against the wall beside the front door. You stuck your arms out, and Michael realized you were holding something. “Happy Birthday, Michael!" You cheer lightly, mimicking a victory horn in place of a party horn. Michael stared blankly, hands finally coming up to grip at the offered package.

It took him a second longer to realize what it was. He felt himself grin...when was the last time he had a birthday cake? He couldn't remember...

He mouthed thank you, though he wasn't sure the movement was pronounced enough for you to recognize it. You stripped off your coat and shook off your shoes, Mike doing little but watching.

“Give me a second to shower and then we'll give you a birthday song alright?" You grinned, looking back up at him. He blinked, nodding gently. You cock your head curiously, smile dimming.

“You okay, Mike?" You asked, stepping closer to him. He nodded again, shifting the cake to one hand so he could yank you into a hug. You yelped, crashing into his frame. He whispered a thank you into your neck, nuzzling into your hold. You pat him gently, a hand coming up to comb through his hair.

"Michael, you're all wet now,"

He only held you tighter.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

hahah security guard Michael's lived with the people his father has screwed over trying to get to him his entire life, so he's quite paranoid. There's a total of four locks on his front door, and he doesn't think he's ever cracked open a window (who knows what who could crawl in at night).

Admittedly he's a little over protective of you. He likes knowing where you are, though its not something he requires of you. Letting him know when you're going out and having an idea of when you'd be back is enough.

Sometimes Mike gets a weird sense of fear, and he despises having you home. The pure thought of someone being able to hear everywhere he goes, every movement he makes freaks him out so much that he lays in bed, curled in a ball and tries not to breathe. You learn to find something to go buy, or to find a friend to randomly catch up with when you hear his presence in the house practically vanish.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Mike's horrible at remembering dates, so there's definitely been a few anniversaries he's missed over time. He tries his hardest to remember birthdays though. he gets you little trinkets, nothing huge but something to "remember him by", as he says. Everyday tasks get hard sometimes, regardless of him insisting that he's fine. Helping him out with tiny things, like putting stuff back where it goes or closing the cabinets he leaves open by accident is something you take up to make him feel just a bit better.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Michael picks at his skin a lot. It's been a habit he's carried for years, and it's not uncommon to see his face or fingers littered in bandages to hide the ache-y bleeding spots where he picked too deep.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Concerned...wouldn’t be the right term for it I think. Mike's only real concept of self-care for a very long time was showering and that was it. He wore dark colors to avoid any real effort that comes with style and occasionally he shaved his scraggly beard. His hair got quite long sometimes, and when he could bring himself to look in the mirror he'd hack at it until the strands at the back of his head were short enough to tickle at his fingers when he ran his hand over his hair.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Yes. You’re a very big part of who he is — he loves totally, relishes in the affection he feels for you. He can handle being apart, of course, but the thought of you leaving him (whether by choice or not) hurts. He doesn’t like thinking about it.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Michael likes origami. There I said it. You find random fortune tellers/cootie catchers around the house, and paper planes are all over your kitchen counters. It helps him with how stiff his hands are after work, it’s a nice, almost mind numbing activity after a long day.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

He doesn’t like being lied to. No one does, of course, but it’s a genuine deal breaker. Trust is a big thing to Mike and the thought of you not caring to tel him the truth or believing that he doesn’t deserve the truth hurts him.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Michael hums. I don’t make the rules. It’s almost creepy at first, cuz you think he’s awake at three a.m., but eventually it’s just another fun thing you know about him. (No, you never tell him. You don’t think he knows.)

buy me a kofi? :-)

#Michael afton x reader #fnaf x reader #five nights at freddy's #fnaf michael afton #Mike x reader fnaf #michael afton #afton family #afton fnaf #s.writes

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pinkpicket · 2 years

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How is namjoon doing?

Be ready for typos and shitty grammer bc im to impulsive to review shit ( adhd mind😭😭)

Okay hi before we start this reading i wanna clarify a few things:

This reading is about namjoon from bts

Im not a bts stan ( not anymore, the reason? Nothing specific im just older now and i dont see a point in stanning any celebrity)

Im doing this reading bc i stumbled upon a tiktok randomly a couple hours of namjoon and it genuinely made me so worried bc somethiing was sooo off, so im curious and i wanna see what's going on

Idk anything else beside this about this whole situation sooo... im gonna be %100 honest here bc I literally have no reason to not be plus i have no bias at all soo... imma be honest af.

Okayy so onto the reading ->

I asked a general question on whats going on with him right now and tbh things don't seem so bad? Like it's just mostly him working and being busy with so many things like basically overwhelmed by the amount of things he has to do (now this is interesting bc isn't bts on a hiatus rn??? Why does he seem so busy? This can be his own album maybe? Or personal things too tbh not just work), tbh it's more like " i have the potential to do all of this yet im not really doing shit so i feel so overweight" or at least that's how he feels bc what im seeing is kinda different from what he sees quite the contrary actually like he seems to be slowly and surely working on his projects and things, the only problem i see here is his how he views this when in actuality everything is actually pretty balanced but to him it's all mushed up together, almost like everything is blurred out from his pov.

His biggest problem has to be not being able to focus and he REALLY hates this ( no surprise considering just from this reading he seems like a VERY hardworking person) it's like he heels all the things he has mastered all over the years are just leaving. The cup that he has been filling up for years and years now is getting empty all over again. This makes him feel like his young self all over again and he doesn't like it one bit, tbh it sort of seems like ( unresolved) trauma from the past are taking a toll on him, like they're hunting him down. Im telling u this all is happening inside his mind, on outside everything seems fine.

Now how long has he been like this? For a couple of months now. But whatever this is it genuinely is affecting him a lot, doesn't matter how much i try to make it seem insignificant, to him at this moment is everything.

His problem specifically is he's not used to this now this can be about him sort of not being with the other members like before( he definitely is still in contact but not as frequently as before) and he seems to not like this or it could even be just the fact that nothing that's been happening lately is really worth celebrating orrrr it could mean whoever he's dating rn, they're not on good terms with each other oorrrr it could just be all of them packed together. Another problem thT i see is him not beinh able to balance whatever that's been going on( which like shouldn't he be used to this by now? Like he's a veryyy famous artist ofc he neglects some personal stuff but u see now that he has more time it's actually affecting him way more negativly " like shit i really neglected all of this? " and now it's all crumbling down on him).

The best thing he can do to fix this? lmaoooo okay okay hear me out i got the empress, now this can mean a few things:

He needs to fucking relax

Needs to focus more on relationships with women ( his mom, sister and his gf )

OR JUST HAVE A BABY LMAOOOO pls this man is desperate to become a dad and tbh becoming a dad will genuinely really benefit him as a person.

So i guess this is it, i dont really wanna get into more details just bc u know it's his personal life after all but since he talked about this publicly i wanted to do a tarot reading just bc i was very worried.

#free tarot #pac reading #tarot reading #bts tarot #namjoon tarot #namjoon #tarotonline #tarot

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yongtxt · 5 years

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hundred [johnny]

word count: 4.5k words

characters: boxer!johnny x doctor!reader

genre: fluff

warnings: blood/wound/stitches mentions, johnny hates hospitals but he likes the pretty doctor, [im not a doctor nor a boxer pls dont say that i have info wrong because I Know]

author’s note: i know this isnt long to some of u but to me it is and i havent written this much for so long im so proud of myself for finishing this:( it isnt that good but this is the first long fic ive written in a while and shhsdjk also i needed to get this out of my system ive thought about this au since that jcc came out where johnny and hyuck was doing muay thai plssss (i couldnt find a better gif tho) ok this is getting too long / feedback is appreciated tysm

Johnny Suh hated hospitals with a burning passion.

It wasn't from a past trauma nor was he afraid of it, it wasn't that serious. He wasn't exactly sure what the cause of it really was. If he had to make a guess, it was probably from the accumulation of the little things, the insignificant factors people would usually dismiss but bothered him enough that it contributed to the big hatred he built for hospitals.

Maybe it was the distinct smell of hospitals, it reeked of death and old people. Maybe it was the atmosphere of the fluorescent-lit hallways, always gloomy and heavy. Maybe it was also the fact that the fees were so expensive and yet the food they provide tasted horrible, even the coffee was a hit or miss. The only upside he could think of was people get better in hospitals, but even that wasn't assured.

Despite how much Johnny despised hospitals, he always finds himself coming back. If he wanted to get better, he had no choice but to go. He would endure the gruesome process over and over again whether it be to treat his wounds or to stitch his cuts.

With his jaw littered with small bruises and his lips busted at the corner, he sat impatiently on the hospital bed as he waited for his doctor. He was fiddling with his fingers, knuckles bruised the same way his face was. He looked beaten up, he always did.

The clothes he wore contradicted the state he was in, they were fresh and laid back. He looked like a college student from the way he dressed. A delinquent more like, if one considered his cuts and bruises. Before heading to the hospital, he always makes it a point to shower and make himself appear presentable to the public. Although no one really bothers to take notice of his effort, only him.

The sliding door opened and Johnny's attention shot up from his phone, his gaze meeting with yours. Your head popped in, peaking through the small crack you made. Your eyes lit up in recognition as it always did whenever you see him.

"Youngho-ssi?" You spoke almost as if it was a question, voice barely above a whisper to make sure you were in the correct room, about to tend the correct patient.

Johnny didn't understand why you always did that, call out his name as if this was the first time you were seeing him. At that point, you've been already acquainted with him enough due to his numerous trips to the hospital. Either way, he nods every time.

You gave him a small smile, widening the door enough so you could enter. You wore a white lab coat, a name tag pinned to your chest and a stethoscope hung around your neck. You were small, although anyone compared to him was bound to be comparatively smaller – that wasn't the point, you looked young and that never fails to astound him every time you go through the door.

You had a clipboard in your hands, scanning through what he assumed to be his condition that a nurse had written earlier after a quick checkup and disinfection of his open wound. Your lips were formed on a tight line, eyebrows furrowed. He continued to stare at you with such amusement.

"You don't have to answer my question, Youngho-ssi, but why are you always here?" You finally broke the silence, startling him in the slightest. You never bothered to ask before, always just offering smiles and small talks while you did your work; maybe his sudden regularity of coming to the hospital recently made your curiosity peaked.

He couldn't blame you. Anybody would be curious why a 24-year-old man keeps coming back to the hospital with no clear explanation.

He cleared his suddenly dry throat, he never liked saying his job. He said, "I box for a living."

"Ah, that makes sense!" Your eyes visibly glimmered, absentmindedly jotting down notes on his medical records. "My coworkers and I thought you were in a gang or something."

"I don't think I would be allowed to be here if I was." He chuckled, making you giggle as well.

"Seo Youngho, 24, minor lip laceration in need of immediate suture." You read of his data from the clipboard, almost comically. It was medical terms he was unfortunately already too familiar with, to him, it basically meant that he had a busted lip that needs to be sewed shut.

"You can just call me Johnny. Youngho sounds too formal to me." He said nonchalantly. You nodded your head to his simple request; it probably was best if you got to know him better since he frequented the hospital so much.

"Alright, Johnny. We'll start the process now, okay?"

With keen eyes, he watched you slip on a pair of surgical gloves. You grabbed a tissue from the metal tray that sat beside him and began folding it into squares. He felt his heartbeat quicken, he hated getting stitches or any form of medical treatments for that matter, but as morbid as it was, he thought of it as punishment for his recklessness in the ring.

"Isn't boxing just, I don't know, senseless violence?" You asked, tone dripping with pure innocence and unadulterated interest as you gently dabbed away the remaining dried blood the nurse failed to clean earlier.

"It's a sport, it's how I bring money to the table." He pursed his lips, ignoring the twinge of pain that surged through his nerves. He visibly relaxed when you placed a hand onto his shoulder to reassure him.

Ever since the first time you got assigned to him, the first thing he took note of was the softness of your hands. You handled him as if he was fragile glass, despite how he easily towered over you. He felt pathetic as a 24-year-old but your gentle touches would greatly help put him at ease.

"I guess. I didn't mean to be rude." You were hesitant, Johnny could tell but he was glad you didn't push on any further. He couldn't handle explaining his occupation when you were about to pierce his skin. "Okay, Johnny, now that your lip is clean and the anesthesia had seeped in, we'll start. I think you know how it goes by now."

"Make it quick, please." He nodded, squinting his eyes shut at the mere contact of a surgical pen grazing over his gaped lips. You were relieved that his cut wasn't too big, you couldn't stomach the idea of putting him in too much pain for longer.

As you picked up the tweezers and string of nylon, you couldn't help but laugh at the six-foot boxer in front of you who was clearly petrified of getting stitches, "This will be done as soon as you know it. You won't really feel it because of the anesthesia, remember? Now count to a hundred backward for me."

Once the numb feeling of nylon dragged through his lips, he swore he saw white spots flicker in his vision. His eyes immediately watered and he tried his best not to squirm under your hold, beginning to count to a hundred backward like you had instructed him to. You admitted it to him the first time you stitched him that it was a trick that you learned from your pediatrician friend. Despite it being for children, it helped to get him distracted while you focused on your job.

Minutes felt like hours, Johnny had been fighting the urge to punch something, anything, to release tension and nerves. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he took a peak and tried to take his attention away from what was currently happening on his lip. His gaze landed on your pretty eyes, how it was narrowed in focus and how your lashes perfectly framed it.

This wasn't the first time he'd observe you up close, there had been many occasions in the past that you had been too close for comfort in order to tend his wounds. It had been too many that it was almost as if he was close to memorizing your features. You were not only beautiful but you were also a smart and capable doctor.

Eventually, you finished and started to rub ointment on his sore lip — the finishing line.

"Try not to eat anything spicy or hard. You know the drill." You grinned at his suddenly pale features, ripping off your gloves as his eyes adjusted to the bright lights of the room. "You're good to go. Be careful next time."

He let out a shaky breath, clearly still winded up from the procedure, "I'll try. Thanks again, doc."

The punching bag felt great against Johnny's fists. There wasn't a feeling in the world that could compare to the impact of leather slamming against his skin. He could last hours mindlessly pummeling the bag if his stamina just allowed him to.

Hyunsik, Johnny's manager and personal trainer, drew away from the punching bag he held in between his arms. He let out a breath and held out a hand to motion that Johnny has done enough.

Johnny was hurting, Hyunsik could see that much. The bandages he had wrapped for the boxer's fingers were turning into a shade of red that they were all too familiar with.

Hyunsik clicked his tongue, "You should've used your gloves."

"How can I grow stronger if I keep relying on them?" Johnny rolled his eyes. His muscles needed a boost and this seemed to be the only logical way to strengthen them — a little blood never hurt anybody.

"Someday you're gonna fracture your hand and you'll be forced out of the ring. Remember that." Hyunsik huffed, his voice stern. "Take them off, I'll clean the blood off."

Johnny reluctantly did as told, unfurling the bandages wrapped around his fingers. The pain was excruciating when the fabric grazed along his tender skin, he winced at the unsightly view of his reopened wounds.

Hyunsik led him back outside of the ring to the benches where the first aid kit was. He made the boxer sit down so he could start cleaning off his wounds. It looked horrific, more so than it usually did and he had no choice but to break the news to Johnny.

"It looks really bad. You need to go get that checked in the hospital and have it sewed back." Hyunsik said, taking a wet towel and carefully dabbing it across Johnny's bloodied knuckles.

He didn't want to go to the hospital. Going to the hospital to have his wounds treated meant that Johnny would be medically required to take days off work to let his hand heal. Johnny frowned, "Don't you have an ointment or something that could help? I can't afford to lose a day of practice."

"Don't you think I know that?" Hyunsik rolled his eyes. "As your manager, I want you to be in top shape for your match next week, even if it means sacrificing a day or two for you to heal."

Johnny could only nod. He sat through Hyunsik's lecture on the changes he should make to his dietary plan and the exercises he should do during his temporary break. It infuriated him that he couldn't do anything about it but nod along.

The incoming match that was set next week would make or break his career as an underground boxer. He didn't have the option of missing it because of some measly reopened wounds. If he had to rest to get better, he had no choice but to suck it up. This was his fault anyway for pushing himself too much.

Johnny showered in the locker rooms and changed into nicer clothes that didn't reek of blood and sweat. His hands were stinging but he shook it off.

He ignored the concerned looks other boxers were giving him and begrudgingly made his way to the hospital to get himself checked in. You wouldn't be happy to see him all bloodied again, he thought.

Much to Johnny's surprise, it wasn't you who was assigned to him. It was a much older doctor with graying hair and a nose stuck too far up in the air. She was rude and condescending, her lack of politeness to her patients was quite appalling. If Johnny wasn't in such a bad mood, he might've complained already.

God, this day couldn't get any worse.

With a meek voice, Johnny asked where you were and at the mention of your name, his doctor gave him a narrowed look. She sneered, "She's handling much more important cases. Does she know you?"

"I think so." Johnny gulped, unsure of the answer himself.

The doctor's grip was tight and she was hasty. It was as if she was trying to speed through the process to just get it over with. Johnny wanted to cry because he was starting to get traumatized by this doctor's procedure, he didn't want to hate the hospital more than he already did.

He internally screamed for your name as he watched the doctor pull on the gloves. The sliding door harshly whipped open and there you were in all your glory, like an angel sent from above to save him from the devil incarnate who was about to pierce his skin.

You were panting and the sheen on your forehead made it obvious that you ran your way to his room. Johnny's heart leaped with glee.

"Unnie, I'll handle him." You said, unable to catch your breath as you made your way inside. "I think the ER needs you more than me."

The doctor seemed hesitant at first but you tried to convince her otherwise. She eventually agreed and left you with Johnny who had a cheesy smile on his face the entire time since you've arrived.

"So Johnny, what happened this time?" You asked, picking up the clipboard that sat next to him on the bed.

"I overdid the punching during training and it reopened some old wounds on my knuckles. It hurts like a bitch."

You pulled a face, "That's a bit intense."

He chuckled, "It's normal."

"Can I please see it?" You opened your palm so he could place his hand on yours. You observed his cuts and the scabs that were beginning to form around it, it was too deep to let it heal on its own so you made the verdict that he needed to get it sewed back together ⁠— as unfortunate as it was since he was a boxer and he needed his hands to box.

You tugged on a new pair of gloves and began the painful procedure, Johnny started counting down even without you instructing him to. You quickly got to work and stitched back his wounds with your lip in between your teeth

Johnny felt squeamish, he could never get used to the feeling of stitches. His eyes were glued shut and he mumbled numbers like it was mantra.

Once you were done, you smiled fondly at your work. You managed to get by with fewer stitches and you felt pride swell up in your chest. Johnny noticed and, as lightheaded as he was, couldn't help but smile as well.

"You're pretty good."

"At stitching?"

Johnny nodded with his cheeks flushed, he made a mental reminder to smack himself in the head later for such a crude comment. You probably thought he was an idiot now.

"I sure hope so." You chuckled, making him blush even deeper if that was even possible. "It's part of my job."

Johnny shook his head in embarrassment, his dark hair bouncing from how vigorously he did it. He mumbled, "That sounded really lame and not smooth, I'm sorry. Please forget I opened my mouth."

You could only chuckle as you apply the ointment around his knuckles. He wanted the ground to open up and just swallow him whole.

"Please let this heal completely, Johnny. Don't apply any strain on your injuries for a couple of days and refrain yourself from carrying anything heavy so that the stitches won't rip." You said, carefully placing down his hand back on his knee. You were gentle as ever, Johnny swooned. "Absolutely no punching for a while."

"I have an important match at the end of next week. Is there any way to speed up the healing process?" Johnny asked, his eyes were almost pleading at you and you blinked at him in surprise.

"Apart from what I just said, there's really nothing else you could do." You pursed your lips, watching his expression visibly deflate. "If you want to have even a sliver of a chance at winning your match, I suggest you do as I say. Your stitches won't take too long to heal, I promise."

If Hyunsik was there with him, he would've probably already scolded him but the point would be the same. He had always prioritized Johnny's health above winning.

"Okay, doc. I'll do my best." Johnny said, defeated.

"You know, I always see the aftermath of your matches and your training. I want to see you in the ring next time when you're not bloody and beaten up yet." You smiled at him and you swore that all the color that was previously drained from Johnny's face came rushing back. "If it's okay."

"Are you serious?" Johnny asked, almost dumbfounded. Did the pretty doctor he'd been crushing on for months really just asked if she could watch his match?

You nodded with the same hue of red now tainting your cheeks.

"O-Of course! It's on Saturday next week! Please come and cheer me on!" Like a little kid, he excitedly rambled on about the details about the upcoming match and you nodded with the same enthusiast as you wrapped bandages around his hands.

You weren't from his world so everything he said sounded foreign to you. The terms he said, the infamy of his opponents, the prominence of it all — you were eager to learn it if it meant seeing him this happy.

You've always known that he hated hospitals. It was clear from the way he acted during your first meeting. He was stiff and tense, the body language he exuded just screamed that he wanted nothing more than to get the hell out of there. As he visited the hospital more and more, you noticed the hatred never faltered. He only became better at hiding it from you.

To see him so relaxed and carefree within the four walls he hated with all his being, it was a breath of fresh air and the feeling you had in your chest grew stronger.

"You're good to go. I promise to see you in your match." You were jotting some last-minute details on the clipboard and you missed the way Johnny kept grinning like an idiot. "As much as I love seeing you here, I hate that you keep getting yourself injured. Keep out of trouble for me, Johnny."

You left the room without letting Johnny say another word.

Fuck, Johnny realized he hadn't asked for your number.

Johnny's match started in ten minutes. His heart was pounding in his ears, he almost couldn't hear what Hyunsik was shouting to him.

The underground stadium was filled to the brim with people, he felt more nervous than he did during his first boxing match. A lot was at stake for this win, he needed the belt. He was desperate for it.

"Johnny, are you listening to me?" Hyunsik raised his voice, aggressively slapping Johnny's cheeks together in his hands so he could focus on him. The boxer's mind was fleeting and it was his job to pull him back to reality now.

He hadn't seen you since last week and as much as he wanted to go back to the hospital to see you, he refused to badly hurt himself in the days that led up to the match. Johnny scanned the crowd for your face but he couldn't see it. You weren't there.

At the lack of your turnout, he failed to mask his disappointment. Hyunsik let out an aggravated groan and pulled the boxer on his feet to berate him further.

"Johnny, please for the love of all things holy, look me in the eye."

"I'm sorry. I'm okay now. I'm listening."

"Good because your match is starting soon and I need you to win this. All your hardships and sacrifices boils down to this match, you hear me?" Hyunsik bellowed, trying his best to keep his voice louder than the cries and chants of the audience. "Show them what Johnny Suh is capable of!"

Johnny nodded fervently, forcing himself into a state of serenity of peacefulness. He let out heavy breaths to even out his breathing as his team surrounded him, prepping him for what was about to come.

Hyunsik raised his hand at Johnny. He had five minutes left until his match started and he wasn't calming down.

"Can I please have some water?" Johnny asked and his medic stumbled on his feet to fetch him a bottle from the nearby cooler. He couldn't help but let out a shaky chuckle, his team seemed tenser than he was.

He downed the bottle as soon as it reached his hand. His hand was shaky. Goddammit, why was he so nervous?

At the corner of his eye, he saw Hyunsik making his way over to the barricade that separated his corner to the rest of the stadium. He arched his neck in a way that would let him take a peek what was so important that Hyunsik had to leave his side when the match was starting in a few minutes.

It seemed like Hyunsik was trying to stop a girl who was forcing her way in through the barricade. His stomach lurched at the sight of her familiar face.

As if he was acting purely on instinct, Johnny shot up from his seat and ran towards you. Hyunsik held up his arm to stop him from going any closer to you. You could've been a deranged fan, for all Hyunsik knows.

"Johnny-"

"I know her."

Hyunsik was startled at his response and started to profusely apologize to you. You looked nothing but smug and Johnny let out a breathy laugh that helped unravel the knots in his stomach. The boxer quietly motioned for him to take his leave and Hyunsik hesitantly did as told only after tapping his wrist as a sign that time was ticking.

You bowed at him apologetically, "I'm so sorry I'm late! There was this damn patient-"

"It's okay. You're here now." He cut you off, a cheesy smile on his face. You easily reciprocated it back.

"I just came down here to wish you good luck." You said with the usual confidence in your tone gone and now replaced with a sudden timidness and bashfulness. "Not like you need it or anything."

"Where are you sitting?" Johnny asked, noticing that you were struggling to keep your attention on his eyes. He peered down and realized that he didn't have a shirt on, he chuckled.

You pointed near the walls of the stadium and he strained his vision to see so far away. He pursed his lips and let out a noise of discontent. You said that it was the only seats available because you were so late.

"Why don't you sit here with them? They wouldn't mind." Johnny said, jutting his thumb over to his team who was furtively watching his interaction.

"Oh no, it's okay."

"I insist. I want you to see me win up close."

You blushed a deep shade of scarlet and Johnny grinned at his successful attempt at a flirt. Was it even a flirt or was it an ego stroke? Either way, it didn't matter because you were smiling at him. You were easing his nerves and you didn't even know.

"I got out of my shift early so I wouldn't be in the hospital later to stitch you up." You teased, softly prodding his shoulder blade.

Johnny playfully puffed out his chest, "I don't plan on getting too injured today, I wanna look cool in front of you."

"Whatever you say, Johnny."

"But I'm nervous. I'm actually really nervous today." Johnny mumbled as if he didn't want anyone else in on your conversation, gone all traces of his cockiness as his heart thudded erratically against his chest when he heard Hyunsik's call of the last minute until he has to go inside the ring.

You gingerly reached for his taped hands and gave it a gentle squeeze, "Just count back from a hundred like I always tell you to. You'll do fine."

"Wait for me after the match, okay?" And so you did.

Counting down the numbers, Johnny clambered inside the ring and the bell rang to signal the start of the match. Being in the medical field meant that you were against all forms of violence so you couldn't really watch the entirety of the match without feeling sick to your stomach. Johnny didn't care, he was just happy that you kept your promise and was cheering him on.

It was hectic and everything was happening all at once. It was loud and everybody was screaming. This wasn't your world, it was Johnny's and your heart fluttered at the thought that he was willing to let you in it.

Eventually, the match ended in Johnny's favor and the next thing you knew, you were being hoisted up in the air. You had the biggest smile on your face, similar to Johnny's who now had a shiny belt slung over his shoulder. All his hard work and all his trips to the hospital paid off.

"Congrats on your win!" You exclaimed, placing your palms on his chest to steady yourself.

"I wanted you to see me get the belt." He admittedly sheepishly, reaching out to hold your wrists in his bruised hands.

"Aren't you hurt in any way? We can drop by the hospital if you want." You asked, checking to see if he had any major injuries but true to his word, Johnny was inflicted little to no injuries during the match, exclude the few bruises on his jaw and a busted lip

"Actually, I'd rather we get some coffee instead." Johnny said, the small smile on his lips making you chuckle.

"I'm sorry, I don't date my patients." You smirked at Johnny's crestfallen expression, softly shoving his side to make it known that you were only joking.

Johnny pulled a face, releasing a breath he didn't realize he was holding once he realized your joke. He played along, "I think you can make me an exception, I don't usually invite people to my matches."

"So this is about getting even, huh?" You were teasing him and now your faces were merely inches apart but before Johnny could even think of leaning in, you spun around and grabbed his hand once more. "C'mon then, my treat!"

Johnny let out a laugh. A boxer and a doctor, who would've thought?

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maldito-arbol · 3 years

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SHDHHRHENS OKAY OKAY UUMMM

The part at the starT about red,,, oh god they have all gone through so much holy shit 😭 Anne,,, what was She gonna say Mal?? WHAT WAS IT? Omg all the stuff with the gems 👀 tbh I needed more of all three of the gems interacting in my life, what They need to do to converge is shhebebbsjejks SASHA AND THE PLANTERS, SASHA AND SPRIG, SASHA AND POLLY, SASHA AND HOP POP, I love them so much holy shit holy fuck “He’s so small. She’d known it before, but where small had once meant weak and insignificant, now she recognizes it also means young, too young to experience this kind of pain, to see his sister bleeding and dying before him when only a day ago she was holding him securely in her arms.” THIS LINE >>>> I love it but also ohmygod the angst Sprig, Polly and Hop Pop falling asleep on Sasha 💖💖💖 “Did She suffer” MAL,,,, why must you do this to me Sasha is the new queen,,, whatthefuck /pos Beatrix is an asshole (Affectionate) Grime being the best dad <3 Sasha is absolutely getting her ass kicked lmao Strength,, tbh I feel like its was royalty in a past vessel (Maybe froog? obv not king/queen status but close to it in some way) Yeaaa ivy and Sasha!! I love them <3 Strength with the speech,, it is def iffy Tbh I love this whole part with grime and Sasha,, it’s >>>>> Strength Is also an asshole (affectionate) WOO ANNES KINDA OKAY YEAH Heh Witney My beloved Tbh I wasn’t sure if you were going with 13 or 15/16 in this fic so that clears up stuff (although it could have been mentioned in one of the other 2 fics but my memory ain’t the best lol) Sashha and Marcy saying goodbye to Anne ughhrghh my emotions The fluff of sasha and Marcy going to bed >>>> I love it sm the crown,,,,, yeah, THAT ENDING THO, WHATS GOING ON WITH STRENGTH

overall a very good start to CMTO Also I’m wondering how many words this chapter was? I read it in like 34 mins-ish so I want to know how many words I read

Nothing like the color of blood <3

Oh myyyy what :) was :) Anne :) gonna :) say :) *checks notes* mother of god that doesn’t get answered for a while—

GEM INTERACTIONS WE LOVE TO SEE THEM ohh I HAVE to do more of these I have so much fun with them

SASHA AND THE PLANTARS WERE THE ONES MAKING ME CRY WHEN I WROTE THIS CHAPTER IM BLAMING THEM FOR EVERYTHING

Crowning Sasha Queen was SUCH a terrible decision on everyone’s part oh my god save this poor child— and BEATRIX. Beatrix my beloved 💜💜💜💜 SO excited to write her character going forward my god

Strength….oh Strength. It’s got some rather interesting experience that I can’t tell you about but it does have to do with the Froog :3

YEP ANNE’S FINE!! She’s a little Asleep at the moment unfortunately but she is Not Dead! Hold onto ur socks cause we’re gonna talk about her more in chap 3 👀

And OH, right, this is literally bc of the fact that they’re 13 in canon. I totally understand ppl wanting to headcanon them as older bc Braly wanted them to be older but AT THE SAME TIME it’s really fun calling attention to the fact that they’re so young when they’re being put through so much trauma :))) like I said before, I too was going through life-altering self-destruction arcs within the span of a week when I was 13 <3 I did mention it a few times before I’m pretty sure—the only example i can think of off the top of my head was in IBYBF chap 6 when the Toad Lords tried giving Sasha beer and Grime was like nOpe

Ain’t a mal fic if I don’t make u suffer over the girls watching the others suffer :)

The crown. Put That Thing Back Where It Came From Or So Help Meeeeeee (no it’s literally so unsettling to me the mere fact that it’s. Sasha’s trophy. And that it belonged to Andrias. *shudders*)

I wonder what’s going on with Strength….. :))

This chapter was a little over 16k words so—WOW ur fast,,,,,

THANK YOUUUU FOR READING AND FOR YOUR ASK 💜💜💜

#ask mal #CMTO #heeeeheeheeeeee #enjoying myself way too much when like one hour ago I thought I was gonna have a mental breakdown #MAN mood swings are weird.

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thewebcomicsreview · 4 years

Photo

Homestuck 2 has updated! Christmas is ruined!

Previously, on Homestuck 2: Literally nothing happened, and a non-trivial portion of the patreon supporters gave up and quit. Can this update pull a Christmas miracle and right the sinking ship of Homestuck 2? Probably not, but let’s find out!

youtube

We’re back in Candyland, having completely skipped over Karkat and John talking about Dave’s apparent death, because this comic is only interested in long conversations when they’re boring and not about anything at all. That’s alright, I got the gist of it.

When Karkat is finally gone, John still doesn’t move. It isn’t as though he has nowhere else to go, since there are quite a few places he might attempt to make himself useful, for better or for worse.

So, it appears to be morning now, meaning that John’s son has been missing in a war zone for almost 24 hours and I guess John literally forgot Harry existed?

Prediction: This conversation is going to end in some variant of “Where is our son?” “Oh shit!”

ROXY: hey john can u do me a quick solid

ROXY: actly idk how quick itll be but its definitely solid

ROXY: harry anderson says i just missed u being here but could u skip back on over?

What.

So, I went back and checked, and apparently nowhere is it explicitly said that Harry Anderson was also looking for the Vriskas, so I guess he....stayed home? Which makes sense, I suppose, but maybe a “Stay here I’ll go look for them” would’ve helped. I wasn’t the only one who thought Harry was out looking for Vriska too.

ROXY: sup

ROXY: follow me

ROXY: well were just going to my room so i guess technically u know the way

JOHN: haha ok.

John follows, trying to shake the ominous feeling he got from what she’d just said. He’d been in and out of this house a lot in the past few days. Why should this be any different?

Is Roxy....horny? Is the solid she’s looking for John’s dick? I mean, that’d make her saying Harry wasn’t available kind of weird, but I think this framing is a fake-out.

...

What the fuck is that lamp, Jesus Christ it’s awful. Just a cat’s asshole, facing the door.

ROXY: r u kiddin me rn egbert

JOHN: i’m not? unless you were, in which case yeah lets say i was also kidding.

JOHN: oh my god, i’m sorry, i don’t know why this making me freak out.

ROXY: i remember our past boot knockin with fondness but that is a situation im not interested in revisiting

Oh hey, it was a fakeout. Good job, Homestuck 2. You successfully implied something just through the art. Art which, by the way, looks a lot better than the last chapter. There are backgrounds and everything. I wonder if Chapter 15 was rushed out due to Hiveswap and that’s why it was so weak?

He’s almost embarrassed by how relieved he feels. So what if his ex wife wanted to hook up? Shouldn’t that be a situation he could navigate? Don’t people like to find solace in human physical connection during dire times? Why did the idea of it make his mind white out in panic more than, say, any number of the traumas he just experienced?

I’m not the biggest fan of the way the narration is going JOHN IS AFRAID OF SEX WITH ROXY LIKE HE’S A TEENAGE VIRGIN AGAIN (LIKE IN HS1!) AND IT DOESN’T REALLY MAKE SENSE PLEASE REMEMBER THIS IT’LL BE IMPORTANT LATER, but okay, noted.

ROXY: u said ur house is gone??

JOHN: yep.

JOHN: completely.

ROXY: jeez

Heh. I like Roxy, still.

JOHN: so i just sat there, watching, trying to figure out why watching my house burn down felt like i was being released from prison.

If this comic actually uses the phrase “home” and “stuck” in the same sentence I’m turning this blog around and we’ll go right back to Winnipeg.

ROXY: aight then no wind bending just use your mangrit

Roxy flexes, the corner of her mouth pulled up into a familiar grin. John feels his guts, so recently calmed, twist up into knots again. Her eyebrows shoot up and the smile loosens. He must have shown something on his face.

ROXY: ok or just like push when i push

ROXY: we both got sick muscles

ROXY: no other adjectives necessary

I feel unqualified to talk about how hard Roxy is pushing the June Egbert thing.

....Is that the fucking portal from Hiveswap under a tarp? Also hi Candy Callie, appearing in HS2 for the first time. One of the Calliope’s is nonbinary, I think, but I honestly can’t remember and I think it’s Meat Calliope?

JOHN: do i get to know what that big thing under the sheet is?

ROXY: hmmmmmm no

JOHN: oh ok.

JOHN: are you sure? i mean, it seems like a pretty prominent feature of the room.

JOHN: space.

JOHN: wherever we are.

ROXY: and a totally mysterious n COMPLETELY inconspicuous feature it will have to remain for now

ROXY: we r kinda in a hurry here fyi

ROXY: and by that i mean

ROXY: we are in precisely the amount of hurry that means im excused from having to a that specific q rn

JOHN: right, sorry.

JOHN: i will pay no attention to the object behind the curtain.

ROXY: u catch on fast egbert

Oh thing HS2 has not been great at is that it has a lot of plot mysteries that are supposed to keep us enticed but they don’t really get implanted into the audience’s head (Remember Vrissy mysteriously collapsing that one time? Probably not, she did it off screen and the boys kind of laughed it off). This one’s hard to miss.

JOHN: so... this is all downstairs?

JOHN: it seems like you had a lot of work done.

ROXY: well no not x actly

ROXY: were in the old meteor

It’s kind of weird how this meteor keeps popping up like this.

CALLIOPE: besides, hUman divorces are even more fascinating than i had ever imagined, and being able to witness yoUrs in motion was an honoUr.

This is an unexpected but not unwelcome direction for Callie to have gone.

CALLIOPE: ah right, right. yoU're probably a little cUrioUs as to where the dickens we are.

CALLIOPE: how much do yoU know aboUt black holes?

Oh, wow, we’re going right there, then. This does seem like a bit of a reaction to complaints HS2 wasn’t shmoovin’ enough, but maybe I’m reading too much into it.

CALLIOPE: no, i mean, what if oUr whole WORLD was inside a black hole.

JOHN: ok.

A’ight, that got a laugh out of me

JOHN: ugh, i fucking KNEW it!

JOHN: i'm so sorry.

JOHN: i'm so sorry that i put the earth inside a black hole everyone. ):

I like this conversation a lot.

ROXY: iirc at least part of y u got so weepy was the fact that u couldnt believe a version of earth existed where ppl got 2 watch more mcconaughey films than you

JOHN: listen.

JOHN: i simply don't think you all appreciated the gift you were given.

Quite a bit, in fact.

ROXY: ur not gonna enter a weird time vortex and change the trajectory of a little girls life with the power of love

JOHN: aw.

Roxy and John have a good dynamic.

CALLIOPE: bUt Upon her departUre, the rift closed for good. as far as i can see, there's simply no way for Us to commUnicate with the world oUtside the black hole.

CALLIOPE: i woUld certainly be very sUrprised to find oUt that anyone had managed sUch a thing!

JOHN: ...right.

John’s phone has very good coverage, since he was able to talk to Terezi in the epilogues, as we’re being subtly reminded of here with that ... before the “right”. I wonder if it still works after alt-Calliope left.

CALLIOPE: oUr exclUsion from the overarching coUrse of events which governs all reality means that oUr existence here is liable to dramatic and violent Upheaval.

CALLIOPE: to pUt it another way, becaUse nothing in here "matters", we are likely to be sUbjected to things which are a bit bats in the belfry, for no reason other than it's totally insignificant to the wider canon of reality.

CALLIOPE: and mUch thoUgh i am personally titillated by some of the conseqUences of this predicament, it is a degrading way for Us to live. u_u

Okay, so we are now being explicitly told that living in the black hole is fucking with the characters and is part of the reason they make such baffling decisions, like Rose not telling Kanaya about Yiffy, or naming her daughter “Yiffy” in the first place.

CALLIOPE: we need yoU to free vriska from the clUtches of oUr misgUided friend jane, and bring her here, to the singUlarity.

ROXY: weve been calling it the plot point

CALLIOPE: yes, the plot point is a key part of oUr plan

CALLIOPE: as far as we have been able to sUrmise, the only remaining method for escaping oUr grim confinement depends on leveraging the UniqUe properties of this location to create an event of sUch catalcysmic proportions that it simply cannot be contained within the black hole any more.

CALLIOPE: something SO dramatic, so hyper-relevant, that it becomes ontologically impossible for anyone to ignore it.

CALLIOPE: for that, we need an individUal of sUfficient narrative cloUt, so to speak.

CALLIOPE: and to liberate her, who better than the embodiment of the aspect of freedom itself?

So, the plan is literally for Vriska to be such a Huge 8itch that the black hole itself gets sick of her and yeets Earth C out of its own event horizon to freedom.

This is actually a great plan.

And that’s Hamsteak. This definitely feels like a bit of a reaction to complaints about HS2, but hey, I dig it, I guess? Definite improvement over the last chapter.

#homestuck #homestuck 2 liveblog

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kidical · 4 years

Note

Oh?? U are sharing hcs??? Slenderman. What is the tea on he.

- DAD

- i go back and forth on who the first creepypasta he took in was. sometimes its toby, sometimes its sally, sometimes its jeff, sometimes its creeps long before the cast we know now that are Le Dead, bleh blah bluh. it depends on what mood im in ❤️ but i guess its a blur for them as well at this point! after the first one hes like :) Actually i like this I like having kids :) I think ill do this more now :)

- he ends up adopting every single murderer, monster, ghost child, etc that he lays his eyes on. he has like 58 kids now

- hes divorced and his ex is zalgo 💔 zalgo wants full custody of the creepypastas and none of them want that. picture it as like, getting a really lame try-hardy step dad (zalgo), and then your guardian and step dad break up and the step dad thinks HES the one that gets custody. this is why theyre at war or something i dont know the actual beef between slendy and zalgo teehee

- hes a very passionate father. i dont mean this in the overly-supportive-dad-at-a-soccer-game type of thing (THOUGH HE DEFINITELY IS THAT TOO), but rather he goes out of his way to know what his kids interests are and he supports those interests and gives them room and tools to further EXPAND on them. hes a passionate father in that he has seemingly insignificant photos of them all framed. shit like clockwork just drawing on a tuesday, sally playing with a doll in the living room, toby sitting on the counter. everyday things, framed, because even those mundane moments are moments he cherishes!

- some kids are harder to get through to than others. they all process their trauma differently and some choose not to process it at all. he does his best to help them in a way that allows them to be as comfortable as possible :(

- his version of grounding someone is letting them get caught and spend the night in jail before he saves their ass LOL (JK HE WOULD NEVER)

- he makes sure to spend an equal amount of quality time with all of them! no one gets less than another person, no one is shown any less attention. he loves his kids so much ❤️❤️❤️

#creepypasta #slenderdad. thats what i want #ask #neerasrealm

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avvidstarion · 4 years

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🖊🖊🖊 for fisher, re, and Maude!!!

!!!!!!!!! thank u mina ily

Fisher is smart and competitive and but deathly allergic to hard work- they’re the kind of person who never did any homework but still got good grades, much to everyone else’s confusion. They have a profound ability to think outside the box and are very creative when it comes to figuring out how they can excel without having to lift a finger (ie, breaking into the aeon building and cheating on their entrance exam because they forgot to study, or spraying someone in the face with hot sauce rather than put in the effort to come up with a reasonable strategy). They’re simultaneously the best and worst person to partner up with for group projects- they put everything off until the last minute but they always come up with funny and off the wall project ideas. Sally is the only one who ever partners up with them bc 1) neither of them have any other friends to work with and 2) she’s the only one who knows fisher well enough to not get frustrated with their apparent lack of effort

Re gets a lot of scars over their time as an adventurer, and most of them are insignificant and only the result of random skirmishes or accidents. Two, however, are of note: they have a thick, ropy scar that spans across their entire stomach, and they have several slashes covering a tattoo on their ribs. They got their stomach scar in a Big Important Battle with a shitload of enemies and NPCs from the campaign they were in, including several members from the evil order of assassins Re was part of in their backstory. The second-in-command of said guild, who Re has been afraid of their whole life, knocked their best friend Thermador unconscious and offered Re an ultimatum: their life for his (really cool parallel th dm set up there bc the second-in-command had killed one of re’s other best friends in their backstory). Re offered their life up for Thermador’s and ended up taking a big ol battle-ax to the gut. In-game this didn’t kill them, they only took like 20 something damage (which is underwhelming) but the in the storyline in my head (which is obvs what I’ll go with if i do anything with Re), they were killed and their god brought them back. Anyway Re immediately beat the shit out of and decapitated the second-in-command, which everyone should be able to do to their abusers! The scars on their side were self-inflicted. Everyone in the order Re was part of has a tattoo of a snake coiled around a dagger forcibly branded into their ribs. Late in the campaign, the leader of the assassins found out that re’s only surviving friend from the order had been secretly helping them, so she cut off his head and sent it to Re as a warning. Re, overwhelmed with grief and anger, took a dagger to their side in an attempt to cut the tattoo off (it didn’t work). Fortunately, Re got to get their revenge- in the final session of the campaign Re got to beat the head of the assassin’s order to death with their bare fists! Again, something everyone should be able to do to their abusers!

Maude’s kind of a bitch and frankly I love them for it! They’re the mean popular girl from an early 2000s teen movie but with, like, mental baggage. Maude’s naturally a closed-off person, but lately they’ve become very angry and mean and bitter bc Trauma. They tend to hide all of their inner turmoil behind flirting and charm and projected confidence bc they’re not one to open up and express their feelings ever, but a lot of the time sometimes it leaks out. They lash out at others when they get overwhelmed with their headaches or with their feelings or with their fear (cop car by mitski is a very Maude song...they get mean when they’re nervous like a bad dog). They also link their self-worth with their appearance and their desirability (they’re the “i have to be the most fuckable person at x location” meme) bc 1) they lack bodily autonomy as a living porcelain and are desperate for any sense of selfhood they can get, 2) they’re pretty insecure despite the bravado (for all their flirting, they’ve never actually even been in a relationship), and 3) like with their projected confidence and charm, they try to look good to mask what’s goin on inside. This is a long-winded version of me saying Maude’s biggest stats are aggressive and charm and that they kin taako from the adventure zone lol

#thank u mina!!!!!!!#this reminded me I have Maude art that I forgot to post whoops #sorry this got so long esp w re!!!!#fisher wiseman #re aesthetic #maude okafor #asks #long post #kirnet

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nutbanana · 4 years

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haha whewwwwwww sis slap zimzalabim gays hello laid ease ! name is yuno title is local ghosting legend pronouns r she/her nd we are stuck with nutbanana until i come up w a sexie url <3 this is gna be new for those of u who know me but i’m gna be putting everything into a read more for now instead of slapping 3 links nd calling it a day so hold my hand 😳😳 and for those of u who don’t know me i have two hands for a Reason haha,, nd my disco is @ daddy yankee#7776 ! add me let’s go feral nd if u wna plot send me ur favorite heart emoji here or on disco <3

* // 𝙻𝙾𝙰𝙳𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙿��𝙾𝙵𝙸𝙻𝙴 … /𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝙼𝙰𝙽/𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙳𝙸𝚂𝚃𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽 : umeko saito, also known as hermes, is wanted for grand larceny. she is a twenty two year old female who has ties to the mastermind because of a charity event she was the face of. 𝙰𝚂𝚂𝙾𝙲𝙸𝙰𝚃𝙴𝙳 𝚆𝙸𝚃𝙷 : expensive fancy dresses, flirty stares from across the room, signing with red lipstick, a glass of champagne with diamonds in it. 𝙳𝙾 𝙽𝙾𝚃 𝙼𝙸𝚂𝚃𝙰𝙺𝙴 𝙵𝙾𝚁 : minatozaki sana.

01. background info.

pinterest board ─── umeko saito, twenty two, up-and-coming actress, doesn’t like to label her orientation, would definitely be part of cherry twitter

full list of aesthetics so far ( core to what shaped her ) : eating fruit on a balcony in your silk pyjamas, signing with red lipstick, strap of your dress snapping, flirty stares from across the room, a glass of champagne with diamonds in it, cherries seductively held between lips, expensive fancy dresses

umeko was born and raised into one of the most expensive neighborhoods in manhattan, daughter to a magnate and a socialité nobody thought would get too far together. luxury was the norm from the get go, and the low profile kept by her parents didn’t quite make their name go unnoticed among the elite of new york. summers were spent in the hamptons and on expensive trips, walk-in wardrobe stranger to everything below high-end and glasses of champagne coming in early

stardom was always in the back of her head. she loves being the center of attention, all eyes on her for as long as she can attrack them, and so the hunger only grew bigger the older she got. in her young, twisted mind, there wasn’t anything more eternal than the ineradicable link between character and actor, and she loves playing the role. the first real taste of fame came only a few years ago, and it became insatiable almost insantly. she’s been on the rise ever since and has scored quite a few big roles to be proud of

j came into the picture at a point in umeko’s life where she was having fun, but it wasn’t enough. something more exciting, more thrilling was missing. and so they met at a charity event where rich people feel like they’re contributing something to society by bidding big money for famous paintings where umeko was one of the faces of said event. she did not hesitate to join him. after all, it makes her feel like she’s playing an even bigger, more dangerous role

her code name has a lot to do with her as a person ! as a lil taste before getting to it, initially, it was going to be loki, the most infamous trickster, but she felt it gave too much away too fast, and although she felt it was the perfect code name, she opted for someone whose trickster label got overshadowed by more important duties, and so it came to be hermes, who, in a way, is also perfect for her

02. personality breakdown.

umeko is........ an experience. she may be fun she may be chaotic

umeko saito’s biggest role is life itself, and she will die a legend or risk becoming a fraud. she was born yearning for attention, and she was born a trickster. she has always been manipulative, loved fooling and playing with people and twisting the narrative of herself, enamouring ( trapping ) others, a strange desire to be the dream girl. and she took it upon herself to make the world her personal stage. and maybe she has played the role for so long she has lost a bit of herself on the way, who knows !

everybody’s sweetheart, looks like a saint ─── yet is the devil holding a halo above their head. she loves to stir shit up, always up to something. won’t hesitate to create a scene if it’s needed, asked of her or solely because she’s bored. a lot of her boils down to being, getting bored. she’s a bit batshit, a bit unhinged <3

umeko is flirty. she likes to flirt, it’s fun, it’s another way to fool people, it’s entertaining, it feeds onto this being the girl of people’s dreams thing. it gets her things and opens ways for her, and she thrives off getting people hooked on her, specially men who think they got a chance with her ( they don’t )

she acts like a bimbo and surely looks like it but may not be one. or maybe she is. she could be a baby bimbo. an oblivious bimbo who plays the role of bimbo in real life. you decide because i can’t JKDGVDS

she’s dramatic to the v bone in more ways than one, loves bringing attention to herself and playing dumb, playing clumsy, an airhead, and she’s a bit of everything ( dumb, clumsy, airhead ), but she knows how to exaggerate it to her gain. u won’t catch her calling herself any of that tho

there really isn’t a big scheme, a big story, a trauma behind umeko’s behavior, some people are simply born certain way and she thrives off being this antagonistic, trickster being just because

03. headcanons.

she lives by herself in a duplex penthouse located on the top floor somewhere in manhattan, she bought it with her first big paycheck. she also has a smaller ( to...... her standards ) apartment she got for her 18th birthday from her parents, and it’s where she takes flings or people who aren’t that close to her as not to disclose her real home

she’s the type to break the strap of her dress before walking out of a store with paparazzis waiting outside for her and pose like she’s marilyn monroe fighting against a burst of air with her white dress, and she’s like “omg no ! the strap of my snapped ! what to do ! don’t take pics or maybe do aha x”

most definitely checks tabloids and stuff after she pulls one of those numbers to grab attention so she can see the reactions And the pics. also probably has a neat instagram feed

she’s the epitome of “all girls do is 🥺🥺🥺🥺” and “girls always trynna ‘🥺🥺🥺‘ their way out of everything”. that’s her

loves cute two pieces pyjamas. silk ones, velvet ones, lace ones, and especially the see-through robes with fur you pair up with cute lingerie and pieces. when at home she’s usually in those, long robe big fur glass of wine in hand, and if not she’s wearing an expensive baddie dress she has no business wearing for no reason

she enjoys dating on and off, having flings, random sex. usually nothing too serious and without too many strings to get tangled in. would she be able to commit ? yes, probably, she daydreams about it sometimes, but it wouldn’t be so easy

despite umeko’s passion for creating a scene and stirring up the pot, she isn’t mean, nor is she someone who is found in conflicts or fights often, if at all. she tends to get along well with everyone ─── she’s playful, a bit crazy, and fairly outgoing. she’s nice despite all her antics. but there is one person that brings out the worst of her, though: nandy freda richardson, fellow new york city socialité with a shared feud going twenty years strong ! they have known each other since they were little and it has kept escalating ever since 💔 it ranges from petty, insignificant antics to more serious, real shit stuff. the catalyst ? nandy somehow managing to make umeko lose a minor role on a small movie she was really anticipating. umeko’s response ? selling her out to aspen when he came asking for more intel on rich people he could rob: she gave him all the information he needed, carefully crafted a foolproof plan then gifted aspen an all - expenses luxury vacation to a destination of his choice <3 umeko was like yeah ? ok i lose my role and you lose your safety money and that one of a kind dress i wanted aha x

when she was sixteen her then boyfriend cheated on her with some chick. the lad pulled the infamous move of playing single and messing with the girl’s heart, so she was unaware of their relationship and was left as mortified as umeko. umeko, though, felt humiliated and, above everything, disrespected, and she also felt for the other girl who was just as much a victim as herself. so umeko made sure he regretted even thinking of disgracing their worth and set for revenge: over the span of a few years she snatched five consecutive girlfriends, one after the other <3 she also kept a good relationship with the girl he cheated on her with

#nocte:intro #i always start writin my intros @ dick in the morning nd then This happens .#wht if i become a y*outuber nd make tht my opening line . what do we think ladies #i woke up this morning nd decided i hated most of wht i had written so i had to restart <3

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dreamy-stars · 4 years

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7/30/20

i’ve never felt this low in a long time, not even in sophomore year of college?? it’s like rly concentrated sadness and rly hit hard within the last month?

- i went through my first breakup, which affected me a lot more than i thought it would. it was so short lived i don’t even want to call it a relationship. i hate to admit it but it hurt so much bc it seemed like he wanted to be with me for a while. he has his reasons and he should take care of himself but i can’t help but feel thrown away without care? i wanted closure and he couldn’t even give me that. my self confidence went down the drain, and i kept questioning if there was something i could have done differently. i even contemplated if i was pretty enough XD can you believe i let a 5’6 man make me feel like this...pathetic...but yeah he rly has no emotional intelligence or something man cmon i wanna talk it out.. - it took me a while to get over him and now i dont miss him specifically, i just miss being wanted and having that connection? anyway my confidence was bad at this point and was feeling insecure in so many ways. maybe 3-4 weeks ago i started going down this dark hole, just questioning my purpose here. i’m not smart, pretty, or talented in any field. i felt kind of useless? just there... (even typing this im like tearing up hehe) comparing myself to ppl again..how i’m not good enough (in eng) just kinda wasting my parents money? and i think about if i were prettier i’d prob be treated better and those around me would pay nore attention to me? brings me to my next point :p - i feel SO lonely. it doesnt help that i went through a break up and the person i was talking to all day every day is suddenly cut from my life. my friends can contact me and stuff but i feel so left out sometimes. it’s not their fault, it’s just how my brain is ig lol. it felt like i was back in high school. i had acquaintances and was surrounded by friends but couldnt rly connect and be close to ppl. what i remeber most was being at the booth and being surrounded by girl friends and not adding to the convo at all. i felt so lonely and insecure i never want to feel that again. recently i felt it with my cousins who i have always felt close to. can u believe? i can’t rly explain it. but when sp brought her friends to the lake i felt ostracized. its so stupid for ne to feel that way, they’re literally strangers and i wish we could be like white folks that introduce each other right at the start of meeting new ppl U KNOW?? idk i’m so fucking sensitive LOL. like at least mai did it with her bf. I Am Nothing. like sp didnt introduce tp so why am i feeling like this. i guess its just me and my deep rooted trauma of being overlooked and forgotten! even when we went to the lake with just our cousins i felt SOOO SOOOOOOOO down and lonely, even more than before. i was sticking near ap bc it was kinda awkward still and i didnt want her to be lonely. i was just floating around and they played games and talked together and stuff and i felt invisible i felt so lonely even with so many ppl i love there. it didn’t help that they had sleepovers and hung out together so ich and never asked me. they even planned to sleepover later that night and didnt ask me. i wonder if it was bc i was neutral and stuck with ap? oh yeah i forgot that i couldnt go eat with them bc there was no room for me which is understandable but i still felt shitty and i think i cried that night :p it’s small insignificant things that build up for me and make me feel like an afterthought. it rly fueled my self confidence issue. AGAIN no one did anything wrong i’ve just been very sensitive and analytical of everything lately. it’s kind of led me to being distant with sp kinda like im testing her and seeing if she would reach out to me at all? its petty but i feel like she hates me fr 😂 might just be me. I Am Nothing...

ANYWAY ive been crying like pretty often just having these thoughts eat me up. it’s better now i think? it’s scary to admit but i’ve thought about dying so many times recently and i hate it. almost like it’s normalized to me now. it’s not that i would ever attempt but i understand what ppl mean when they want to disappear? i’m very blessed with loving parents and a healthy able body and a good living situation. i never want to put my parents and family through something that traumatizing. i haven’t properly expressed these feelings to anyone besides one watered down text to darwin. it was hard to even type the text, i ended up crying in the bathroom. i’ll have bad days and the thoughts creep up on me and i try to distract myself by watching stuff and it helps. i’ve been working out and dieting and i feel a lot better about myself and more positive. i’ve thought about therapy seriously but im hesitant still. if i still have issues i will, but talking through a screen and the risk of others hearing kinda turns me off. just processing my feelings and thinking about them extensively has helped me a bit but i think having a professional tell me about my feelings will make me feel better. idk how to bring it up at all, and i feel like my issues arent serious enough? but my brain been going cwazy :3

i’ve been having a rough time at home just doing a lot of nothing but being sad and working out.. i hope with school starting soon i can get out the house and be productive again! recently ive been dealing with the problem of “living for others” i notice that i care about the comfort of others and how i can satisfy them and appeal to others at my expense.. i’ve been thinking about how im not good enough for this type of guy to like me LIKE WHO AMMM IIII WHY DO I CARE...WEIRDO..... maybe im dragging myself too hard i dont think i do this much but i do be a nice comfy doormat for others :)

but overall i feel better than a few weeks ago i think! idk what that was about why is my brain like this....making irrational thoughts and hurting my own feelings...idk but it will be okay :)

#diary

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hawkinsschoolcounselor · 5 years

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noah schnapp said that will may have a separate storyline next season and that they’re filming elsewhere. do u have any theories on what that storyline may be? do u think he’s gonna be separated from the rest of the party majority of the season or it’s just gonna be a 1-2 episode thing? also when he says separate do u think he means just him or him with the rest of the byers?

I think I read that somewhere in my post-Season 3 media binge. Honestly though, I don’t put much stock into what the actors say about the future of their characters. Even if they do know, they wouldn’t be allowed to say much unless they were instructed to. I personally chalk that statement up to wishful thinking on his part. Let’s pretend it’s true, though, because I enjoy theory crafting for Season 4.

A logical continuation of Will’s story arc would be his struggle to accept himself and to find peace with his trauma. He may feel a need to pull away to do this, but I just don’t know where that would lead. I personally don’t like the idea of a purely solo story, as I didn’t enjoy it when they did it with El in Season 2. I felt the entire episode with the gang felt disconnected from the rest of the story. I wouldn’t want a repeat of that. Will probably would be apart from the Party, and they set that up by having him move away. Mike would hopefully be coming to visit, or vice versa, since it’s the holidays, but Will needs to find his place apart from the Party, as he literally finds himself in the background with them. I think his story would have to include El, as they’ve still not interacted after three entire seasons. I can see them bonding, acting almost like twins. Maybe some jealousy involving Mike causes friction at some point. Of course, I expected that in Season 3, so what do I know?

I do think we’ll get a focused Will story arc though, at least as compared to his background role in Season 3. I’m hoping for an X-Men type of thing where his powers fully manifest due to physical and/or emotional trauma. I’ve previously written how I think Brenner will take advantage of a de-powered El and capture her for further experimentation, bringing Will along as a bonus. Again, though, I expected him to show powers in Season 3, but all we got was a Mindflayer proximity alarm.

I think a nice plot twist would be for a rescue team to go in after him, only for him to have broken free himself and rescuing his rescuers. Will deserves his moment of glory after three seasons of pain. It could be the culmination of his struggle to find himself. Alternatively, Will becoming 012 could be the cliffhanger for a possible Season 5.

In the end, while I have fun theorizing about this, I’m a counselor, not a storyteller. I was right about a couple of things when I made predictions after Season 2: Nancy and Jonathan shutting down the lab would result in trouble, and a rift between Mike and Will would develop now that El was back. The first was right because the lack of a government presence allowed the Russians to set up their own lab in Hawkins. The second, while correct, was a conspicuously insignificant moment. I wasn’t able to predict pretty much anything else, aside from Steve being awesome yet again.

I would highly suggest taking a look at @kaypeace21‘s theories. I can’t even touch that level of detail, but we generally have similar ideas.

#stranger things #stranger things 4 #will byers

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momentofmemory · 5 years

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Steeeeeeeve do Steve.

bless u. just as an fyi i’m gonna stick to mcu!Steve for simplicity’s sake.

it’s still going to be absurdly long and i’m not sorry.

How I feel about this character

ahksdlfjsk

ca:tfa - fell in love with him. the movie’s a great character study until the montage of him as cap starts, regains its footing at the very end. the i had a date is the best and most heartbreaking closing line in the entire mcu. my favourite thing is that he just cares so much and his motivation is literally just that he wants to do right.

a1&2 - joss does not understand cap at all and i’m still salty about this. main positives are the brief depictions of his not insignificant ptsd. The text of the dream in aou is especially great even if joss doesn’t fully understand the meaning (steve does not fear going home because he doesn’t know how to leave war; he fears leaving war because he don’t know how to go home and this is an important distinction). fav thing is his consistent willingness to see the good in people/give second chances (bruce, clint, natasha, the maximoffs, etc.)

ca:tws - masterpiece. perfection. tearjerker. fight choreography. fav thing is that it highlights the power of friendship and believing in people in a spy movie of all things and i dig that. also the helicarrier scene makes me cry every time.

ca:cw - really annoyed me the first time i saw it bc a)the marvel fandom went NUTS and b)i didn’t think it was a cap movie so much as an avengers movie but you know what, it grew on me. fav thing is the fact that he honestly does try to explain his reasoning for his actions several times and i really wish this had been fleshed out more.

a:iw - listen. listen if you told me i was going to see steve literally just a)walk out from behind a train and b)hold back a shiny glove for like 30seconds and it would be amazing i would have laughed at you, but here we are.

a:eg - steve lifting the hammer and taking on thanos is my second favourite moment in cinematic history, but my favourite one come right after, when steven grant rogers, just a kid from brooklyn, beaten and broken and in no shape to win whatsoever, stands up to face the entire army all by himself. because that is why i love steve rogers. it’s not because he knows he can win. it’s because he knows he can’t, but he’s going to do it anyway. it’s all very samwise gamgee: “they kept going because they were holding on to something: that there’s some good in this world, and it’s worth fighting for.” and i resonate with that, you know? people lose for doing the right thing every day, and maybe it’s not enough to save them. but it might be enough to save the next guy down the line.

“you start running, they’ll never let you stop. you stand up, push back — they can’t say no forever.”

All the people I ship romantically with this character

don’t usually ship peeps so i’ll just go with canon, as i do think steggy works quite well. most of the other popular ships have enough implicit canon to support them so as long as no one drags peggy through the mud to AU their ship i’m pretty fine with that too (but lord am i ever done with people dumping on steve bc their ship didn’t get fulfilled… like dude, if you only love a character if they’re romantically entangled w a specific person you don’t actually love that character).

My non-romantic OTP for this character

u know it’s gotta be my girl natasha romanoff; pairing them up in tws is still the best mcu character decision to date. i just really really love how mutual their friendship is. they’re fully fledged characters on their own and clearly have lives outside of each other, and they acknowledge that they won’t always agree. they also read each other very well and respect the other’s opinion, two things i highly value in a friendship.

another facet i find really important is that they’re mutually vulnerable with each other?? like, nat has seen steve cry and steve has seen nat cry. nat has fallen apart with steve there and steve has fallen apart with nat there. it’s a level of reciprocity we don’t get in most of the other mcu friendships (also why i hate hate hate bruce/nat why the valhalla and hel is nat exposing her deepest trauma to make bruce feel better in aou??), so. basically they just embody the kind of friendship where having the other one around makes them both better people, which, imo, is pretty much the definition of what friendship is.

My unpopular opinion about this character

depending on what’s floating in the suggested tag i sometimes feel like liking him is the unpopular opinion. 😅uh but in seriousness my unpopular opinion is that he did not make the decisions he did in cw just because “but bucky uwu,” though that’s obviously a factor. the accords came out of nowhere with a 1000 page law right after he’s experienced a)the world security council try to nuke new york and b)shield being hydra, and that’s in-canon. real world events would include him coming right out of seeing the us impose japanese internment, discovering we nuked civilian cities in japan twice, vietnam and everything that was the cold war, etc. like, i definitely think the general concept of some kind of restrictions on super heroes makes sense, especially when it comes to respecting other countries’ borders. but do i wanted it to be headed up by general thaddeus “i want a hulk”? heck no.

also an unpopular opinion might be “it’s super possible to think a character is wrong about something without hating them.”

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

i don’t remember who said it first, but peter parker is very much the perfect combo of Steve’s and Tony’s best characteristics and i would have loved to see him interact with Steve more. training sessions, arguments about what counts as the better half of new york, run-ins with our favourite blind ninja, etc. just so much lost potential right there.

i would have also liked more closure between tony & steve than what we got in endgame, but eh. i’ll live.

#steve rogers #meta #mcu #marvelmeta #ca:cw #ca:tws #asks #personal #experimentaldata #long post #i'm so sorry this got so long you guys #i got an unexpected free hour at work and just #went off?#ahem

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parabellum-rpg-archive · 5 years

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N A M E: Thomas Young A G E: Thirty-Four O C C U P A T I O N: Negotiator L O Y A L T Y: Sinclair Crime Family

SOME RISE BY SIN, AND SOME BY VIRTUE FALL.

Whenever Thomas first met the‌ Sinclair family, he was a severely malnourished eight year old boy who had spent his entire life on the streets. Everything about‌ Thomas’s life before then had been devastatingly empty. Thomas had a family, somewhere. He couldn’t quite remember how he’d ended up homeless. He remembers an argument with his parents, one of them left, and everything after was just a blur. There was a long car ride, a cheap motel, and everything after that sort of got fuzzy. None of it mattered, anyway – because the ending never changed.

Warm meals were a luxury that Thomas could not afford. He didn’t even know what a real bed felt like. At such a young age,‌ Thomas was sure that he’d spend the rest of his life suffering. Because of his harsh upbringing, Thomas was elusive, distant from any person that tried to help. Life in Chicago had not been kind to him, and it made him weary of strangers and what intentions they might have. He was well accustomed to doing what he had to do to survive, which oftentimes meant digging through dumpsters for anything of value – mainly food. He frequented the nicer restaurants sometimes– not because of the food, but because sometimes, the patrons would offer him something.‌‌ Food, money– it didn’t matter.‌ It was all useful to Thomas in some capacity.

The first time that Thomas spotted Johnny Sinclair, he was in a brand new Mercedes. The suit he wore must’ve been worth thousands of dollars, at the very minimum, and Thomas imagined what it must’ve been like to stand in that man’s shoes. Even just for a second. Thomas didn’t know it then, but the Sinclairs would eventually become his true family.

Intrigued by the lavish lifestyle that they lived, Thomas would frequent the restaurants that Johnny and his family would visit. He always had his two sons not far behind, and one of them was actually close to Thomas in age. They didn’t spot him at first, but Thomas was always watching from afar. One day, Thomas was approached by a young Jackson Sinclair. Everything in Thomas told him to go running in the other direction, but all the Sinclair boy wanted was someone to play with for a few hours while his father tended to business inside of Sinclair’s.

After that afternoon, Jackson insisted that Thomas come home with the family. Johnny wasn’t a particularly good father, but he knew that Thomas could be molded into an honorary Sinclair. The family didn’t see him as a grimy, annoying kid. They took a chance on him, and before the sun went down, Johnny had sent some of his people out to look for Thomas and his family. Both of his parents were dead; Thomas had no one.

Rather than sending him off to foster care, the Sinclairs took Thomas in. After that day, Thomas forgot what it felt like to be hungry.

To say that Thomas flourished in his new environment would be an understatement. The family business inspired him, and he hoped to one day play a crucial role in it. Thomas was never formally adopted, but he was, by all means, a Sinclair. Thomas took on the name with pride. All of the suffering that he’d endured in the past was only a stepping stone for all of the luxuries that awaited him.

As he grew older, he was eager to prove his worth in the family business. Despite little to no schooling, Thomas had a desire to learn.‌ He was brilliant for a teenager, able to calculate cost effectiveness before Johnny could even get his advisors to sit down and actually do the math. At sixteen, Thomas was suggesting business models to further expand the Sinclair empire. Chicago was small, and the Sinclair name was so full of ambition.

As the trauma of his early life faded away, Thomas found himself a more confident, levelheaded individual. Time spent with his surrogate brothers helped Thomas find a happy medium – between Jack’s level head and Morgan’s impulsive thinking. Thomas decided against college. Immersing himself even further into the business seemed like the best route for him. And, by the time that he was in his mid-twenties, Thomas became a beloved and feared member of the organization.

Thomas was highly skilled in combat. He could easily disarm a person at a moment’s notice – but that wasn’t what set him apart. That wasn’t the path that Thomas chose. Instead, he took advantage of that brain of his. He was a quick thinker, observant, able to pick up on seemingly insignificant details. He held them in his mind for later use. Whenever the Sinclairs needed to finalize a deal, it was Thomas that they sent. He had a handshake so firm, most people were either intimidated or impressed right away. He was charming, calculated, handsome. The art of negotiation – that was Thomas’s true calling.‌ Whether it was legitimate business or criminal, it didn’t matter. Thomas always won, and by extension, so did the Sinclairs.

Thomas made himself an absolutely vital part of the organization. Nowadays, it’s hard for him to even remember a time when he had so little. The death of Paisley impacted him rather heavily. She, like the rest of the Sinclairs, were the only family that he ever knew. Losing Paisley brought back old emotions, to being a young, scared little kid. He didn’t like it. Following her funeral, Thomas developed a desire for vengeance that was almost too strong. He wanted blood. Two months after Paisley’s death and Thomas can’t seem to move on. She needs to be avenged, fairly.

Fair, in Thomas’s eyes, means every single Costello is buried six feet under.

CONNECTIONS:

— Relationship Status: Single — Siblings: Morgan Sinclair (NPC), Jackson Sinclair

FC: Steven Yeun

The role of THOMAS YOUNG is currently OPEN.

#lsrpg #lsrp #crime rpg #mob rpg #bio rpg #thomasbio

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