#or that despite how dirk feels like he deserves her walking away he would freak the fuck out if hal was like ok im moving out for a month

[conceptofjoy]

[protecticarus]

Hey, there! I saw you're busy so I'm not sure when/if you'll see this and if you'd even want to fill it, but I have this idea and I'm sure you'd give it justice: what if Dirk, after seeing how quickly Ken turned away from his friendship with Bart to join Blackwing, started thinking Todd would do the same, if offered? And him being really insecure, he would believe he deserved it, too... and maybe, in some way, Todd finds out? And he's a little pissed but mostly just wants to comfort his friend

yes I want to fill it! it’s a good prompt!

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Finding out about Ken working for Blackwing had been like a slap in the face for Dirk. Sure, he didn’t know Ken well, or at all really, after all he’d only met the man once, but he had been one of the good guys. He’d been Bart’s friend. Bart, who Blackwing had captured, just like Dirk. Bart’s friend Ken had teamed up with the people that ruined Bart’s childhood.Every time Dirk thought about it, his heart dropped into his stomach. He knew there were bad people in the world, he’d sure met his fair share of them, but he’d never thought someone could just… Turn bad? Again, he barely knew Ken, but he did know Bart, or at least he understood Bart, so seeing someone she trusted turn on her like that made Dirk feel hopeless.He felt sad for Bart. Just like Dirk, she didn’t have many people in her life. Her first real friend had betrayed her. Dirk’s heart went out for her.More selfishly, Dirk suddenly felt very unsure of himself. Had he been foolish in trusting the people he’d befriended? They were all nice people who had helped him a lot, but wasn’t that what Ken had been for Bart? Blackwing had a way of manipulating people and Dirk wasn’t exactly the easiest person to be around. What would it take for his friends to turn on him? Todd hadn’t exactly been excited about Dirk’s entrance into his life in the first place. How much of his shenanigans would be too much for Todd to handle? Would he think it’d be easier to work against Dirk instead of with him?A while ago Dirk wouldn’t have even entertained the thought. Blackwing was pure evil. Todd wasn’t. But Bart hadn’t thought Ken was either. Yet, Ken chose to betray Bart in the worst way possible. In the end, it worked more to Ken’s benefit to ditch Bart and lock her up.What did Todd really benefit from being Dirk’s friend? Nobody wanted to be in constant danger? Nobody wanted an uncertain future? Nobody wanted to spend all their time with someone who caused those things? Nobody wanted to spend all their time with someone who annoyed them?

These thoughts wouldn’t leave Dirk alone, no matter what he did. Todd and Farah didn’t seem any different since the Cardenas case. Todd was his grumpy but caring self as Farah was her guarded but kickass self.But Dirk looked at them differently. More than once he had woken up in the middle of a night from a nightmare where Todd smiled at him fondly only for his expression to turn into a chilling, evil grin as he locked Dirk in his Blackwing cell.Dirk felt lonelier than he’d ever felt. He was with his friends, but he felt completely isolated. He didn’t know who to trust and what to think.It was like he was waiting for the other shoe to drop.Which eventually resulted into a whole debacle and a very worried Todd.Dirk had fallen asleep on Todd’s couch. Dirk wasn’t one to fall asleep in places other than his bed, actually falling asleep just like that in his bed wasn’t very common for him either, but he had been very exhausted recently.Todd had just gotten a call from a client with important information about their current case and went to wake up Dirk.Which is when Dirk freaked out.“Dirk?” Todd said and went to shake Dirk. “Come on, we have to go.”In the middle of yet another dream about evil Todd, Dirk’s eyes shot open and he jumped up from the couch.“Woah, Dirk, calm down, it’s okay. We just have to go now..” Todd tried to calm him down.“No.” Dirk said in a shaky voice and stepped away from Todd.“What?” Todd questioned.“I’m not going. I’m not. Going.” Dirk responded firmly, but his hands were shaking.“What? We just need to go-““No! I won’t go back! Not even if YOU ask!” Dirk yelled.“Dirk! Calm down! Mrs. Danes called with more information about the Hello Kitty clock? We’re supposed to go check it out?” Todd explained and carefully tried to walk towards Dirk.Dirk stared at Todd. His anxiety slightly decreasing. The case. They were on a case. They were in Todd’s apartment. Todd was talking about a case. Oh god.“Case. Yes.” Dirk whispered.Todd gave him a worried look. “Are you okay?” He asked.“Fine.” Dirk replied, rather unconvincingly.“What just happened?” Todd asked.“Bad dream.” Dirk said. Todd waited for more information but none ever came.“You sure that’s all?” Todd asked. Dirk simply nodded. Todd sighed.“What did you mean by ‘even if you asked’?” Todd asked. He didn’t feel the need to ask where Dirk was afraid of going back to.“Nothing.” Dirk whispered.“Bullshit.” Todd snapped.Dirk looked down at his feet, unable to deny Todd’s accusation but refusing to explain.Todd sighed again. “I don’t wanna push you, Dirk, but… You’ve been acting weird for a while and I’ve never seen you freak out like that?” He explained.Dirk remained quiet.“Have I done something?” Todd asked.“No.” Dirk replied immediately. “Not yet.”Todd raised his eyebrows questioningly. “What?”“Nothing. Nothing.” Dirk was quick to reply.“Dirk. Talk to me. Please.” Todd pleaded.Dirk took in a deep, shaky breath.“Please… Please don’t make me go back.” Dirk whispered.Todd frowned. “Dirk… Why would I make you go back… There?” Todd asked, somewhat offended by Dirk’s implication.“Ken did.” Dirk replied.“What?” Todd asked.“Ken was Bart’s best friend. He was all Bart would talk about. She trusted him. He was all she had. And then he went and took over Blackwing. He runs Blackwing now. He’s the main bad guy. He locked Bart in Blackwing. He was her friend and he did the worst possible thing he could have done to her.” Dirk explained.Todd stood still and quiet for a while. He didn’t know what to say. His first reaction was anger. He felt it flare up all over his body. How could Dirk think he’d do something like that? Todd knew he wasn’t the best person but to force Dirk back to the place and the people that ruined his childhood? How could he even humor that idea?Before he could explode in anger like he usually did, another thought occurred to Todd.Blackwing had hurt Dirk. Hurt him bad. Physically and especially mentally. They made it so that Dirk had a hard time trusting anyone and viewed himself so terribly negatively. They messed him up.And then Ken happened.The best friend of another Blackwing victim had done the worst possible thing Dirk could think of. He had teamed up with Blackwing.The thought of Todd doing so was insane, but surely Bart didn’t expect Ken to do so either.It made perfect sense for Dirk to doubt him, to doubt everything. After everything Blackwing had put him through… After Ken, not even his friends seemed safe to be around.It all broke Todd’s heart.He walked closer to Dirk who flinched away right away.“Dirk.” He said as softly as he could. Dirk finally looked up at him.“I understand why you’re scared. What Ken did… No one saw that coming. How could we have? What he did was… Fucking terrible. I can’t imagine how Bart must feel? But Dirk… I would never and I mean EVER do that to you. I wouldn’t.” Todd explained.Dirk sniffled. “But-““No.” Todd interrupted. “I get it. I get why you’d be worried. You’ve been through hell with Blackwing, you and Bart both, and Ken’s betrayal is… Really unbelievable. But I am not Ken.” He explained.“I can’t even begin to understand the shit you’ve been through and what kind of trauma it must’ve caused but I understand enough to know that you didn’t deserve it. No one does! I would never put you through that. I may be an asshole but I’m not sadistic. Nothing they could possibly offer me would be enough to get me to do that to you. Nothing. Okay?” Todd said. “I wouldn’t do that to anyone, let alone my best friend.” He continued. “I’m your friend, Dirk. And I know, Ken was Bart’s too, but they’re not us. We’re… We’re real, okay? I promise. I’d sooner have a pararibulitis attack for 24 hours straight than put you through Blackwing again. It hurts me to think what they did to you, I couldn’t live with myself if I was the cause of that. I promise, Dirk, you’re safe with me. I know you haven’t felt safe in a long time, but I promise, I will make sure you feel safe again. Eventually.” Todd finished.Dirk stood completely still for a moment before bursting into tears. Todd took the last remaining steps between them and Dirk basically collapsed into his arms.“It’s okay.” Todd whispered and rubbed Dirk’s back. “You’ll be okay.”Dirk sobbed out something that sounded like ‘how could he’ and ‘poor Bart’ before continuing to softly cry into Todd’s shirt, holding firmly onto Todd’s shoulders.Todd held his friend and prayed that his pain would fade. If not with Todd’s reassurance, at least with time. Right now, he wanted nothing more than for Dirk to be okay. He knew Dirk had suffered, he knew he was broken, but nothing hurt more than knowing Dirk felt so alone and unsure even around Todd. He promised himself he’d do his best to show Dirk that he was there for him.Todd’s thoughts turned to Bart. She had no one. She was in Blackwing. Put there by her friend. Todd’s blood boiled. Everyone in Blackwing was rotten to the core. And now Ken was one of them, despite knowing what they did to their ‘projects’?Todd wanted to burn Blackwing to the ground.But for now, his priority was Dirk. He would convince Dirk of where his loyalties lied and eventually, they’d take Blackwing down.Together.

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if you have any fic ideas, send me prompts! I’d be happy to write them. my inbox is open! x