#or maybe im not so ready but i’ll try and draw as much as i can

[quinn-pop]

yet another oc that only exists because i wanted to write something very specific

(middle is a little older, hence her scar healing. i like to think she gets a glass eye at some point)

anyway this is mira! (they/she) since that wip is almost 20k words and counting i won’t give away too much but long story short she’s the result of meta going “one last time, i promise” and adopting yet another kid

also galaxia kinda indirectly picked the name :)

i’ve mentioned before that i headcanon that pretty much all astrals are autistic and this is just kinda an extension of that. whereas meta tends to suppress his emotions and conform to others, mira…doesn’t. she gets uncomfortable and upset and lashes out at people easily, and working through their emotions is no small task.

the main reason i chose to write them that way was for the sake of narrative but i’ve grown attached to it because there’s a lot of ideas there i’d like to explore. stuff about navigating emotions and relationships when existing is so suffocatingly uncomfortable. it’s not something i could center around Kirby himself, but i think it makes sense with a post character development meta knight.

they are very loved (omg oldee cameo???)

kirby was definitely very excited to have younger siblings after being used to being the youngest in the room for so long!! (with the like. one and only exception being gooey.) he’s super affectionate with both of them and wants to have a close relationship one day, but for now mira is pretty unappreciative of that fact lol. they don’t like being pestered for hugs

everyone else is okay tho

(i know that’s hard to read. oops. “obvious bite marks”. siblings being siblings.)

mira also has a very love/hate relationship with the egg kid, being so close in age they kinda Have to get along but in typical sibling nature they also fight a lot. sure it’s probably rough for a while but i think in the end they’d be good buddies. maybe not as close as Kirby and Bandee but still.

anyway i have a lot of thoughts and am very busy but. i’m really enjoying writing about all this lately it’s been fun ^^

[sandara-and-coco]

I am ready Art Fight 2023 🐺

[dovveri]

tattoos and bad behaviour

synopsis: momo has been hiding her new tattoo from you and she’s finally back for you to see it.

warnings: strap-ons, vibrators, sexting, degradation, slight public sex, y/n is tied up and gagged, edging, they’re switches your honour! (but also dom!momo)

w/c: 5.7k

a/n: first this first that first smut :P been obsessed w lower stomach tattoos lately theyre so fucking hot its like my version of a happy trail on a woman 🤤

｡･:*˚:✧｡

your girlfriend momo was keeping her new tattoo a secret from you. she got it while she was overseas and everytime you asked her for a picture or for her to show you while you were video-calling, she refused and you were left imagining.

not today though. she was finally coming back from her month long work trip and you were determined to see the new piece of art etched onto your lover’s skin.

unfortunately you weren't able to greet her at the airport because she had a work meeting right upon arrival so you had to resort to waiting for nightfall, before all your mutual friends would head to the club for a reunion.

you slip on a short red dress that highlighted your ass and left little to imagination. you were midway through drawing your eyeliner when she texted,

m ♡ : baby what r u wearing tn?

y/n : why do u wanna know 😠

m ♡ : ur not still mad at me r u? :(

y/n : what do u think.

m ♡ : can u stop answering my questions with questions pls, i’ll show u tn baby 🥺

you scoff.

y/n : yeah along with everyone else. whys it so secret anyway? yk i love you no matter what if thats what ur afraid of

m ♡ : its not that baby ik u do and ily too 🩷 you’ll understand when u see it why i couldn’t show u

y/n : wtf is that supposed to mean 😠 wtv, u can see what im wearing when u see me later tn

you put your phone down in faux annoyance, letting her messages come through but not bothering to read them while you continue applying your makeup. you weren’t actually annoyed with her, maybe a little hurt that whatever she’s hiding her other friends had already seen on her business trip, and if it really was something she was ashamed of or regretted getting, which was totally understandable you’ve had your fair share of bad drunk decisions, you thought she knew you enough to trust you with these things.

ugh whatever. you weren’t trying to soil your night with something so small. you were also excited to see momo again after a whole month of being apart, so ready for her to pick you up and slam you against a wall with her lips against your neck whispering how much she missed you during her trip. god okay maybe you were a little horny too but who wouldn’t be after being completely untouched by their partner for a whole month. you rub your thighs together.

maybe you could put on an extra little something for momo. only to get back at her a little. show her you could play this game too. tease something she could only know, but not be able to do anything about.

you hum as you go towards your closet, searching for what you were looking for.

you smirked slightly as your fingers grasped the small bullet vibrator, grabbing its corresponding remote. you head back towards the bed, spreading your legs, finding yourself plenty wet already with thoughts about how hot momo would look desperate and thrusting fingers into you at an unbelievable pace.

you bite your lip at the thought, tracing the small vibrator along your outer lips, coating it in your essence, letting it catch at your clit and moving it back down towards your entrance before repeating.

you quickly grab your phone and snap a picture of the vibrator covered in your slick, sending it to your girlfriend.

y/n : sent a picture.

y/n : what im wearing tn

m ♡ : what the fuck y/n. im at work

y/n : you asked me what i was gonna wear 🤷‍♀️

you grin while waiting for her reply, knowing she was probably flustered with that adorable flush across her cheeks. you slip the vibrator inside yourself, clenching around it wishing so badly it was momo’s fingers or strap inside you instead.

m ♡ : you fucking knew what i meant y/n. you better not be touching urself rn. ur mine to ruin tonight.

you whimper slightly as you start tracing circles over your clit with the vibrator still off inside you.

y/n : so what if i am? u can’t do anything about it

m ♡ : you fucking brat u don’t wanna play this game with me rn.

y/n : oh but sweetie you started it. im just playing my move. maybe u shoulda given me what i wanted when i asked politely. now ur gonna have to spend the entire night knowing there’s a vibe going off inside of me while we’re with all of our friends.

you snap another picture, spreading your lips open with your fingers to show the vibrator inside you.

y/n : sent a picture.

you don’t bother waiting for her reply, hoisting yourself up and getting ready to go. you thought it’d be best not to get yourself off just yet, leave yourself nice and wet for her for when she’d eventually tear your clothes off.

｡･:*˚:✧｡

bass pounding, sweaty bodies grinding against each other, and flashing lights. all that was missing was momo. all your friends had arrived already, momo’s coworker saying she was kept behind a little late and would be here as soon as she could.

as much as you wanted to tease her you were also worried that she was taking so long. you were about to grab your phone and call her when she finally walks in.

and holy fuck.

hips swaying in low rise jeans that hugged her legs in the most delectable way. tits hidden in a hardly modest top that covered her belly button in a v shape and left her ab lines out in proud display. but most importantly… the fresh tattoo that adorned her lower stomach. if tramp stamps were hot this… this was a whole other level.

suddenly the vibrator in you that was at the lowest setting felt like nothing. you needed her pounding into you right fucking now.

she spots you and smirks, knowing exactly what you were thinking. god you missed her, your drenched state was proof of that enough.

she stalks towards you, your eyes never leaving those dangerous hips as they sway from side to side with each step.

you play it cool, leaning back against the bar, but feeling yourself clench at the sight.

“hey baby.” her voice is deep and raspy, fuck you’ve missed it. she closes in on you, placing her arms on both sides of you on the bar, trapping you in.

your fingers can’t help but grab her hips desperately, gripping hard. “so this is what you’ve been hiding from me.”

she leans in closer, speaking with that sexy husk of hers into your ear, “i knew you wouldn’t be able to resist me if i’d shown it to you earlier. you’d probably book a flight just to see me knowing how impulsive you are.” she tuts, “bet you wanna get down on your knees right now and get me off with your tongue. trace the tatt and make it yours. you don’t care that all our friends and the entire club would see. you’d like it actually, wouldn’t you? little slut, want the entire world to know how good you are with that mouth huh?”

you’re not given a second to respond as she pushes a thigh between your legs unceremoniously and you gasp at the sudden friction, whimpering into her ear.

“that good huh? how long have you been fucking yourself here for anyone to see? how many times have you cum?”

you can barely get out, “n-none, fuck momo i need you please- ” your eyes close, burying your head into her neck, humping against her thigh to give yourself any friction at all.

“so you’re a brat and a liar now huh? think you can get yourself off on my thigh right now?” she rips away from you suddenly leaving you gasping for breath, hands trailing after her hips, “gotta meet the rest of the gang baby.” she’s sporting a devilish look on her face as she grabs your hand and pulls you along, “this is a reunion after all.”

｡･:*˚:✧｡

momo is positively evil. she’s spent the entire night showing off her new tattoo, her outfit alone highlighted exactly what she wanted, and anyone who looked at her would follow the lines of her clothes and body down to where only you were supposed to have access to.

she also makes a point of teasing you to no end. grabbing your ass, pulling you down into her lap when you’re all seated and grinding you down into her thigh. you almost came then and there but she pushes you off of her at the last moment.

you’ve had enough.

you’re seated on opposite ends of the the booth now since she was catching up with some of her friends that you only really knew by name.

you make sure to catch her eye when you turn the vibrator in you all the way up. your legs clench and you have to shuffle in your seat as discreetly as you can.

she raises an eyebrow, eyes narrowing.

it doesn’t take much because you’ve been built up for so long and her gaze on you as you grab the table, knuckles turning white, combined with the risk of literally cumming in a public space next to all your friends gets to you.

pleasure washes over you, if only briefly as you cum, eyes closing and mouth opening slightly.

“hey y/n, you okay?”

your eyes snap back open as you turn to your friend, “y-yeah, just a little antsy i g-guess.”

momo’s jaw is clenched so hard you’re afraid she’ll break her teeth.

“oh! we should all get up and dance then! it’d be good to finally join in anyway.” another friend perks up and now everyone’s making their way to the dance floor, your post-orgasmic blissed self following them before your pulled back by a strong grip.

“what the fuck was that?”

you feel yourself dripping again.

you ignore her, pulling her along onto the dance floor, desperate to be closer to her.

“did you just fucking cum?” she’s relentless, pulling you into her hard, arm wrapped possessively around your waist.

you hum along to the music, grinding into her, “no.”

“fucking liar. i know what you look like when you cum. and now so does everyone else in this fucking club.” she’s snarling, hand moving down to grope your ass roughly, “that face is mine. this ass is mine. no one else should be able to see or touch what’s mine. and you’re gonna regret giving them that.”

you smirk, “make me.”

“one month away and you’ve forgotten your place. i’m gonna have to fix this new attitude of yours.” she’s slipping her hand into the hidden pouch of your dress, stealing the vibrator remote away from you.

“‘s your fault. you didn’t prepare me for this.” you run your fingers across her stomach, “if you had, maybe i wouldn’t be so needy. you should just take me home and fuck me right now.”

she growls, “oh no. you’re getting fucked like the slut you are. right here in front of everyone.” she flicks the vibrator up a notch, your hands grip her shoulders but she pulls away quickly.

hoisting herself up onto a small platform nearby, she grabs the pole in the center of it, and starts to dance.

her hooded eyes are on you the entire time as she drops to the floor, turning and bringing herself back up, full ass on display and you think you drool a little but you're not sure because she's somehow cranked the vibrator up again. whoops and cheers as she climbs the pole, spinning with sexy elegance showing off her core strength, abs flexing, breasts pushed together. she comes back in and grinds her front against the pole.

then, and you don’t even know how it happens because you’re so focused on not cumming, she’s suddenly upside down, legs clinging to the pole, cheeky smirk right in front of you as she yanks you in by the neck and kisses you for the first time that night.

you moan against her immediately, she's sucking your bottom lip into your mouth and bites, and you’re helpless against her as she ravages you. you can barely keep up, not even kissing her back just panting into her mouth with hot breaths as she licks into you, invading all of your senses, you're so close to cumming.

you're incoherent as you moan into her, she turns the vibrator all the way up, smirking against you as she feels your mouth go slack and you cum.

but just as sudden as it came, she switches off the vibrator, is off the pole immediately, tugging you through the crowd, yelling something at your friends that you can't make out, and hailing down a cab.

you're barely conscious and mourning the loss of an incredible orgasm. she let you come, but stripped it away from you just as quickly, it could barely classify as an orgasm.

her hand is on your thigh the entire ride back to your place, she's gripping you and inching her hand up your dress. the vibrator turns on again and you jolt, stifling a moan as the cab driver looks at you in the mirror in mild concern.

you grab her arm pausing her ministrations, whispering desperately, "f-fuck mo- c-can't, 's too much-"

she chuckles darkly, "you're the one who begged me to take you home and fuck you. you're gonna take what you get now."

the short drive feels excruciatingly long as her nails rake the inside of your thighs. finally you're home and you're pulling her out of the car and up the stairs to your apartment, fumbling with your keys as she moulds herself to your back, kissing your neck and nipping at your ear.

the door opens and you almost fall in but she catches you and slams you against the door again, closing it as she immediately latches on to your lips.

"fuck baby- god- do you know what you- fucking do to me?" she's mumbling between kisses as you wrap your legs around her waist, her hands immediately going to grip your ass as she pushes you into the door further, hips grinding against your core.

you're a mess, you need her inside of you now. "b-bedroom."

she doesn't take any convincing and lifts you up. your panties are absolutely soiled by now and she could probably feel it against her bare stomach as you grind along her abs.

she throws you onto the bed and crawls on top of you, lips attacking every exposed sliver of skin available to her. you moan as she hikes your dress up, knee pressing into your center.

hazily, you remember what got you this worked up in the first place. and with a glance down, you're overcome with a need.

surprising her with your strength, you're flipping her over and working at the zipper of her jeans, "need to eat you out now. please."

she moans, "fuck baby alright. you're gonna look so fucking hot between my legs, the new tatt crowning your head."

you’re kissing down her body after successfully undoing her jeans and sliding them down her legs. a free hand moves up to grope roughly at a breast and she arches into your touch. you stop once you reach her belly button, pulling yourself up a little to admire her new art.

she's staring at you with lust and rubbing her thighs together at the way you're devouring her with your eyes.

your fingers come down and lightly trace the sharp lines and shapes as she jolts up. you follow the lines on the left side of her lower stomach, tracing down to right above her pussy. you were obsessed. the twin patterns lead directly to her center, bringing your attention to the pathetic excuse for underwear still covering momo's pussy.

you lean down, licking along the tattoo, and her hands are in your hair immediately, tugging and pulling, trying to get you to where she needed you most. but you resisted, licking over every sliver of inked skin, biting down and marking her on the sensitive spot just above her hipbone.

"still can't believe you hid this from me for a whole fucking month."

she bucks up into you, "you woulda put everything down just to see me. and i couldn't have you doing what you're doing right now a month ago when it was still fresh. gotta protect the skin y'know."

you scoff, "coulda at least sent a picture or showed me on video call when i asked." you bite down again and suck, leaving a dark purple mark next to one particular stroke of ink.

"f-fuck baby. first of all- ah- tattoos aren't pretty when they're healing. they're all flaky and red and really gross. second, oh shit- i told you -mmf- i wasn't gonna tempt you to come to me, you have a life and a job but you don't care about any of that when it comes to me."

you get her panties between your teeth, and slowly pull them down her legs, admiring the way slick clings between the material and her exposed pussy. you fling them to the side once they're off. "yeah cos i love you idiot."

"and i love you too but you were not about to fly halfway across the world just to fuck me."

you hmph in annoyance, "guess i'll have to make up for it now then since you've kept this from me for so long." and before she gets a chance to reply you're diving in, licking long straight lines up from her entrance to her clit.

her hands fly to your hair again, keeping you there, gripping your head, thighs closing around your ears. you can still hear her moans as you suck her clit into your mouth and tongue it from side to side, releasing it with a pop and moving down to collect the gush that comes out of her.

oh how you've missed this taste. the heady scent of hers driving you insane as you take inhales through your nose while your mouth is at work.

you look up at her, back arched and head flung back onto the pillow, chest heaving as she crumbles around you. with the new tattoo crowning her pussy, you've never seen anything hotter in your life.

"please y/n. inside- fuck- need you- inside."

you hum against her pussy, the vibrations pulling another gush of wetness out of her as you tease a finger along her entrance.

she's grinding down desperately, "fuck- please- fuck y/n-"

you slowly insert your finger, moaning at how tight she is and how her pussy sucks you in, clenching around you. you don't give her a second to adjust as you start pounding away, sucking her clit into your mouth harshly, fingers pumping in and out of her with practiced speed.

she howls and her grip on your head tightens, you can feel her getting closer as it becomes harder to thrust in and out with how tight she's pulling you in.

"f-fuck! y/n! f-fuck. cumming!" she gushes as you keep thrusting into her, helping her through her high and licking back up to her tattoo, sucking another mark onto her pretty skin.

she relaxes as you pull your fingers out of her, bringing them to your mouth and sucking. you crawl back up kissing gently as she catches her breath, an arm thrown over her eyes. you’re kissing her neck when she abruptly flips you around, smirking down at you, hair cascading her face.

"you've had your fun now. i think it's time i teach you that lesson we were talking about earlier hm?"

her hands are lightning fast as she pulls down the zipper of your dress, slipping it off your body leaving you in your lace red bra and panties. a finger finds its way down to your crotch as she lightly presses down on your clit and you arch your back into her, moaning her name.

"so wet baby. now i'm gonna ask you again and i don't want you to lie to me this time. how many times did you cum tonight?"

"t-two!"

a hand comes down slapping your clothed pussy as you yelp, scrambling away before she yanks your hips back into place and holds you there.

"what did i just say about lying?"

"'m not lying- please!"

she breaks character for a moment, eyes softening as she looks at you with an adoring gaze, "y'know the safe word baby?"

you nod, "raccoon."

she smiles and leans down to peck you, "good girl, don't be scared to use it mmk?"

you nod desperately, "momo please- i'll be good please, please just fuck me."

her eyes narrow again, "it's too late to be good. let's count them hm? first you interrupt me at work, then you disobey me and touch yourself, even going as far as to make yourself cum in front of all of our friends. and let's not forget the bratty attitude you've been giving me all night. you're the furthest thing from good right now." her hands are back at your clit, circling and rubbing until you're squirming under her.

"didn't mean it! just wanted -ah- you to fuck me! not my fault you couldn't do that."

a hand comes down hard on your pussy.

"there's that attitude again. think i'm gonna need to gag you."

your eyes widen at the image, leaking onto her palm.

"you like that? such a slut, getting wet over the thought of being restrained. in fact, let's tie you up too so you don't get any funny ideas."

she's up and back in seconds, gag and silk ties in hand. she makes you strip completely and you feel yourself blush slightly as her gaze on you remains like a hawk.

as opposed to her harsher words, she's gentle while tying you up, making sure the ties are comfortable and not hurting you. your heart flutters at the care she takes and the constant checking in. once you’re all tied up and gagged, spread-eagled with limbs attached to all 4 bedposts, she makes you signal your safe action and as soon as she’s satisfied you’re comfortable with everything, she’s crawling over you again and spreading your legs. 

“so so pretty for me. look at you, dripping onto the sheets.” she runs a finger through your now naked folds as you buck up, pleading for anything.

"so much prettier now that we've shut that foul mouth up too. shame i can't kiss you anymore though." she pouts as she spreads your folds with both hands, blowing gently.

the cold air hits your clit and you shiver slightly in pleasure.

"gonna take this out now," she's pulling the vibrator out of you and you suddenly feel so empty even though the vibrator wasn't too big to begin with.

you're fighting against the restraints, muscles all tense and in anticipation.

"oh don't worry," a dark look passes over momo's face, "i'll fill you up soon enough."

a finger enters you agonisingly slow, and pulls out even slower. she's kissing up your stomach, and takes an erect nipple into her mouth as she repeats this.

you're straining and pulling but she's relaxed, sucking at your tit and kitten licking your nipple. the hand that's not inside you comes up to the other breast, kneading gently and you want to cry. you need things rough and fast and hard and she's giving you the complete opposite. she switches breasts, but doesn't up her pace at all, taking her leisurely time as you writhe underneath her, completely at her control.

your muffled words against the gag make no sense and she comes up and kisses the side of your lip, "shhhhh, baby relax. relax and enjoy it would you?" she continues her kisses to your ears, licking the shell and biting down softly on your earlobe. the hand that's at your breast pinches a nipple and twists. her tongue trails to behind your ear, and then down to the sensitive skin of your neck where she begins to suck lightly. her hand moves to the other nipple and twists it as well, the painful pleasure is driving you insane and you're clenching your jaw around the gag so hard you might just bite into it.

all while her other hand has been pushing in and out of you at the same slow pace she's started in. sometimes she'd be generous and brush against your clit but none of this was going to be able to make you cum.

"if you think you're cumming again tonight you're dead wrong by the way." she hums against your collarbone, "you've come however many times already so the rest of the night you're gonna lie here and look pretty while i take my time making love to every inch of skin i've missed for a month."

you curse internally, eyes tearing up as you subject yourself to her play. she's relentless and unforgiving for the next half an hour. teasing nips, slow licks, and slower fingering.

finally, it seems like she's speeding up a little. thrusting into you with a little more power wt every in, and pulling out a little faster with every out. the hand that has abused your breasts for the last 30 minutes starts gripping harder, pulling at your nipples and pinching them with vigor, twisting, sucking, and flicking her tongue over them and you're building up so quickly after being left stimulated for so long.

she hums against you, "so fucking pretty like this."

you moan as her pace picks up, two fingers pushing in and out of you, hard enough that your breasts start to bounce with each thrust and she adores that, pulling back to watch as the saliva-slicked mounds bounce with each thrust. a third finger enters and your eyes widen, her gaze set on you making you clench around her as you come closer and closer to the edge.

she's leaning down again and blowing against your wet nipples and you're so close to coming and-

fuck! she's stopped completely, hovering over you with a teasing smile on her face that you would give anything to wipe off right now. she coos, "awwwwwwh you look so adorable frowning like that. is my baby mad? mad she didn't get to cum?"

you nod, your eyebrows creasing together.

"well what'd i say earlier hm? you've had your share today. you're going to learn how to stop being so selfish and greedy after you've already come so many times."

she's sliding down your stomach now, grinning up at you from between your legs, before swooping in, tongue hot against your folds as she sucks and licks and bites.

you're writhing again, so easily built up and you come so close, so fucking close, trying your hardest to close your thighs around her head to trap her there but the silk ties prevent you from doing so. and she pulls away again. you want to pull your hair out in frustration.

she's looking at you in amusement. moving off and going to grab something you can't see because you're still tied to this fucking bed.

when she returns she's sporting an 8-inch strap on that bobs along as happily as she is when she skips over towards you. it's almost absurd how adorable she looks with a fake pink dick attached to her and you'd laugh but you just need her inside you so fucking bad you're crying instead.

she's on you again, dragging the lubed up strap along your folds, letting it catch at your clit before moving back down towards your entrance and repeating.

she giggles as you frown, "i'm gonna fuck you until i cum now. if you cum i'm stopping and riding this myself while you watch tied up. understand?"

you nod quickly, needing her to just get inside you already.

she pecks your nose and starts to slide in. you're already moaning at the feeling, pussy clenching and pulling her in deeper until she bottoms out, hips meeting, skin touching.

she lets out a low breath, "fuuck y/n. you have no idea how fucking good you look right now."

she watches in awe as she pulls out, strap even wetter than it was before it went in, and she pushes back in roughly without warning.

"mmph!" you're caught off guard, eyes rolling into the back of your head at the sudden combination of pain and pleasure that leaves you reeling.

she doesn't take her time this round. she's pulling out and pushing back in before you know it, setting a ruthless pace as she pants above you, eyes locked on the way she was splitting you open with every upward thrust.

your eyes drift down to her breasts, still trapped within her bra and you desperately wish you could free them, suck on her nipples or play with her mounds, or just watch them bounce up and down as she rutted into you.

she's huffing when she notices your gaze, "s-slut wanting- hah- my tits h-huh?" she stops for a second, hilted inside you as she quickly unclasps her bra and pulls it off, returning to her unforgiveable pace. "mm- there- fuck- you go. can't do anything about it because your tied up and gagged but you appreciate the view don't you?" she's smirking as she pushes herself upward, running a hand through her messy hair as she continues to plunge into you and you think you could die right now.

she brings a hand up to a breast and squeezes, nipple coming out between fingers as she pulls and twists it, moaning at the feeling, head falling back exposing her pretty neck. you're trying your hardest to focus on her and not how close you were to cumming and she's giving you the perfect distraction.

you falter though, as your eyes drift further down, reminded again of the tattoo that outlines her hips, clenching hard as the sight of her lower abs prominently drawing your attention to her strap.

"eugh- you're so fucking- uh- tight around me baby. fuck- are you gonna cum? it's getting harder to pull out with how hard you're -mmf- clenching."

you can't handle everything that's going on. the build up of the entire day creeping into a tight ball in your stomach.

and then she's pulling out again and you lurch forward with a cry. no! god you were so close again fuck!

but before you knew it you felt the ties around your limbs loosening and the gag being taken out of your mouth. you're flipped around onto your hands and knees and she's pushing back into you at an even rougher angle that scratched just the spot to make you see stars.

"fuck! fuck fuck fuck-" you can finally be vocal again as the sound of skin slapping skin fills the room, the bedhead thumping against the wall with how rough momo was pounding into you.

"yeah? you -ugh- like that?"

"fuck yes! oh fuck you're so deep inside me mo- please, please let me cum i need to cum around you, please,"

she moans pulling you up so you're only on your knees, "yeah? fuck- you think you -shit- deserve to cum after all this?"

you're crying as you feel a hand slip down your stomach and rub against your clit roughly, "yes please! i've been so good i- fuck- please! momo!"

another hand comes up and pinches your nipple, she's thrusting into you at an impossible speed, heavy breaths against your ear muttering curses, "fine. cum y/n. cum for me."

you let go with glee, falling down onto the mattress as her hands move back to your hips, pistoning into you trying to reach her own high. you feel her spasm and moan, falling onto your back, still lightly thrusting as the both of you ride out your highs together. you don't think you've had an orgasm this good since the first time she used the strap on you, the build up of your ruined orgasm at the club and the several times momo edged you tonight coming to climax.

heavy breaths fill the room as you both try and catch your winds again. she's the first to pull out slowly, and you groan at the feeling, pussy still sensitive from the fucking you got. she tosses the strap to the side, cuddling into your back, wrapping an arm around your midriff.

you turn in her arms, snuggling into her chest and breathing in her scent. her hands come up to brush through your hair relaxingly, and you're brought back to the world listening to her heartbeat slow down.

your hand comes up and lightly traces over her tattoo again, and she hums in pleasure at the feeling.

"good?" she asks.

you chuckle into her chest, "so fucking good i think i almost peed myself."

she snorts that loveable snort that you've missed and kisses your forehead. "speaking of peeing, c'mon, gotta get you cleaned up."

you whine, clutching her waist, "noooooo 10 minutes pleaseeeeee."

she rolls her eyes fondly, "you're going to fall asleep."

"'m not." but a yawn betrays you.

she laughs, "yes you will. c'mon."

you groan as she pulls you up, eyes flickering down again to her tattoo.

"i love it mo."

she smiles, "i knew you would you big idiot."

"don't keep stuff from me again."

"yeah yeah, you're a big girl and you can act mature, suuuure."

you stomp your foot like a child, blushing when she laughs at the action proving exactly what she just implied.

"fine you're right, but doesn't mean i like you for it."

"shut up dork, you love me."

you sigh, meeting her eyes, overwhelmed with the way you feel for her, "yeah... yeah i do."

she smiles dragging you towards the bathroom, "i love you too dummy. now let's get cleaned up before you catch a cold."

you sneeze and she laughs at you but you think you're probably the luckiest person alive to be able to be with your girlfriend.

[starysky1289]

I need more Toxic!Dark!Sorority Vanessa!!

That fic was just.. Chefs kiss. You write so well. 🥹

Thank you for the compliment it means so much. 😭😭🥺I took dark off it because to me toxic is just way more extreme dark.

Toxic!Soroity!Vanessa X Reader. The argument.

TW: DubCon, toxic relationship, drug mention, Pet play if you REALLY squint, slight abuse.

“ Vanessa please. Just sit down and study, you need to pass this test. “

“ I’ll be fine. My father will just throw some more cash at the teacher if I fail. I can’t belive I’m dating a fucking nerd…”

You sat on Vanessa bed, holding your rather expensive book on your lap, watching as Vanessa did her makeup in the mirror.

“ listen. Just do a little with me. If you do, I’ll go down to the frats party with you “

You got up and put your chin on Vanessa’s, as she pushed you off, mumbling to herself.

“ I’m not taking you out anywhere until you cut that hair. You know I hate it long. But fine, give me the fucking book…”

You sighed, and gently placed the book on her vanity, she flipped it open and read some random page, before closing it, going back to her makeup.

“ there, I’m done. Now leave me alone, I gotta finish getting ready for this party. “

You shrank into your skin, you looked at her through the mirror, your eyes starting to water.

“ your..your still going to the party without me? “

“ yeah? Who else is bringing the drugs. “

“ but..I can’t come? “

Vanessa groaned, standing up and heading towards her closest, looking through her multiple revealing outfits.

“ I said you’re not going out till your hair gets cut. And maybe if you loose a few pounds too. “

Your legs trembled, you hated when she brought up your weight, you had been working hard to try and loose some for her, but it was never enough.

“ b..but I’ll be alone in my dorm nessa…”

“ listen. You’re lucky we’re dateing, stop crying and get your shit together, I’ll drive you to your place. “

You grabbed your bag, shoving the papers and books you’d brought try and get her to study with you, it never worked. You froze, your hands trembling as you stared at the bright pink scrunchie around your wrist.

“ I can’t. TAKE IT ANYMORE VANESSA. “

She froze, staring at you in disbelief. You pulled the scrunchie off you wrist, holding it tightly in you hand.

“ I can’t take this abuse! I can’t take how you treat me like an accessory, I’m more than that! I’m sorry your father never loved you enough to give you a good life, but that doesn’t mean you can ruin mine. IM DONE. “

You throw the scrunchie in her small trash, grabbing your bag and storming towards the door. As you reached for the door handle, your wrists were quickly grabbed, and Vanessa shoved you against the wall, her eyes blazing with rage.

“ how dare you. You’d be nothing without me. NOTHING. “

She snarled in your face, her grip around your wrist tightened, you could feel her acrylics digging into your skin. She smirked, her eyes still starring into yours.

“ you wanna go to that party so bad? Fine. We’ll go, and we’ll make sure everyone knows your mine. “

She let go of you, and turned to her closet, throwing you an outfit. You watched as she changed her shirt skirt, tossing it back into the closet and going over to her vanity draws, before glaring at you.

“ don’t just stand there. Change. And if I fucking hear your complaining your dead. “

You quickly began to change, you had faced away from Vanessa, trying not to make much more eye contact with her. She had given you a pink tank top and a white short skirt, that barely covered your ass.

“ take the panties off. “

“ b-but nessa- “

“ do it. “

She growled at you from across the room, you reluctantly stripped them off, tossing them into the corner. You finally faced Vanessa. She wore a white crop top with a pink faux fir jacket, and a pair of tight black joggers shorts. You couldn’t help but notice the bulge in them, your lips quivering, you knew exactly what she was going to do with you.

“ now, let’s give you the last few changes~ “

She pulled your hair up with the pink scrunchie you threw out, putting it in a low ponytail. She fished around another cabinet and strapped a cold peice of leather around your neck. Looking in the mirror, you could see it was a pastel pink collar, you touched it gently, before Vanessa grabbed your wrists again, dragging you downstairs, and eventually out of the Soroity house.

“ your gonna listen to me. And if anyone comes up to you you’re gonna come find me, I don’t need another repeat of last time, do we? “

“ n..no nessa…”

She got into her car, you sitting in the passenger side, as she began to drive out.

“ one more thing. Im Mistress tonight, so if you need me, you’ll ask your Mistress, you got that? “

“ y-yes v-van-….yes mistress…”

Tears swelled in your eyes, as embarrassment flooded through your body. Vanessa glanced at you and scoffed.

“ again with the tears. Stop being such a crybaby, people don’t like it, I don’t like it. “

You wipped your face, and stayed quiet. Your heart raced at the thought of what she’d do to you. Eventually, you pulled up to a large red house, you could hear the music blaring from inside already. Vanessa stepped out and you followed her, she knocked on the door, and a tall, blonde guy welcomed her in, eyeing you down like meat as you followed her in.

People seemed to cheer as Vanessa came in and quickly sat herself down, emptying her purse, she had filled it to the brim with multiple baggies with white powder in them.

“ Y/N. You get the special job of counting my money. And if you do good I’ll reward you~ “

You only nodded, sitting next to Vanessa. You felt her fiddle with the collar, but you didn’t look.

“ alright fuckers, line up. Give the pretty girl your money. “

Dozens of people immediately lined up, digging through the pockets for wads of cash. You’d take it, count how much, and tell Vanessa, who’d hand them a bag worth the money. You couldn’t help but notice the glares you were getting, people eyeing you up and down. Even when they came up to get there shit they’d talk to Vanessa about.

“ pretty thing you’ve got there Nessa, what made ya bring her. “

“ she wanted you to throw a fit before i was gonna go, so i brought her along to help. Don’t worry, she’s got something coming. “

You stayed quiet when the line slowed down, and eventually everyone had gotten something. Vanessa pulled you into her, playing with something in her hand.

“ god…keeping you in a leash has been the best idea I’ve had. It really makes sure you know who you belong to~ “

You had finally noticed it, the black braided leash Vanessa had attached to your collar. You blushed and turned away, Vanessa only chuckled and pulled you in by it, holding you chin.

“ don’t be embarrassed. I think you got me a lot more money than I would off. I think that deserves a reward baby~ “

“ n-Nessa- “

“ mistress. “

“ mistress. Y-yess. I-I don’t wanna do anything in public like this..”

She chuckled again, spreading her legs, messing with her shorts and letting the pink strap pop out.

“ well, keep your mouth on it and no one sees. Easy as that. “

You stared at you, hesitantly moving down to sit between her legs. She held onto your ponytail, pushing your face against the strap.

“ pretty little thing…cmon. Get to work. “

You looked up at her once again, before slowly taking it in your mouth, slowly bobbing your head on it. She kept a good grip on your hair, you watched her look around the room, like she was making sure no one saw, but everyone could.

“ hey, Sarah, Bailey! No im not busy, get me a seltzer and join me. “

You flushed, those were the names of her closest friends. You tried to pull back, but she kept your head down, you reluctantly continued to suck on the pink silicone dick.

The girls sat on each side of her, you could see them looking at you, snickering behind their hands.

“ how’d she get in this predicament~? “

“ she wanted to run her mouth. And I couldn’t just let her get away with that. She threatened to leave me, Bailey, could you believe that. “

Vanessa finally let go of your head, you slowly pulled off, laying your head on her thighs. Sarah petted your head like you were a dog, snickering to herself.

“ can she do any tricks Vanessa~? “

“ mm..not tricks, but she’s a fantastic listener, arnt you baby~? “

“ yes..yes mistress…”

The girls all laughed, you burried your head in Vanessa thighs, you longed to go to your dorm and just sleep, but you had to run your mouth.

“ hey, baby. “

You lifted your head,Vanessa pulled the leash slightly, signaling you to sit on her lap. You felt so out of place there, the strap pressed against your pelvis, Vanessa’s arms around your waist.

“ you do one more thing for me and I’ll take you to ya dorm. “

“ w-what do you want…”

“ ride me. “

You burried your head into her shoulder, the girls giggled as Vanessa kissed your neck.

“ cmon baby, it’s just like at home. Only difference is we’re out. “

“ b-but I don’t like people watching..”

“ this isn’t a option, Y/N. You’ll do this, I take you home, I come back and get wasted. Maybe I should have let you walk out, you could have gotten kidnapped and raped on the way to your dorm. Then I wouldn’t have to deal with you. “

You quickly hugged her, tears forming in your eyes, before you pulled your face out of her shoulder and stared at her.

“ n-no please..d-don’t let me get hurt..”

“ then you gonna do it? “

You held her shoulders, taking a deep breath, before lowering yourself onto the toy, moaning softly. The tears slowly began to roll down your face as Vanessa gripped your waist, helping your ride the strap at a steady pace.

“ that’s it…my girl always comes back around to me, don’t you~? “

“ y-yes mistress, i do. I-I’m your girl..”

All threes of the girls laughed again. Vanessa would slam you down onto the strap, making your moans grow louder every moment.

“ m-mistress please- I-I’m gonna cum please~!! “

You felt the toy spread you, like it could rip you if it was any bigger. You slammed yourself down faster, trying to please her, trying to please yourself.

“ aww..dirty girl. Go ahead, cum…but your walking out of here by yourself, I’m not holding your hand~ “

You where to intoxicated by the pleasure to care, letting Vanessa thrust into your, before you let out one last defeated moan. Your walls clenched around the toy, as you let out heavy breaths. The music was still blaring around you, no one seemed to notice what had just happened besides the two girls and maybe one or two bystanders.

“ such a good girl..what do you say~? “

“..thank you…thank you mistress…I love you..”

Vanessa, for the first time, gently held his ur waist and helped pull you off, as she stuffed the soaked strap back into her shorts, letting you walk out toward the door.

“ I’ll be back in like fifteen, save my seat. “

Vanessa called to her friends, before you walked into the passenger seat, Vanessa pulled you into her, kissing you deeply.

“ oh i love you too…oh how lucky you are that your mine~ “

[toxic3mmy]

hiiii ive been rlly obsessed with pjo lately, and this idea's been stuck in my head sooo

a pjo au where reader is a child of eros, and accidentally shoots q with one of the love arrows while practicing archery?? and then he gets a puppy crush and starts following reader around, just a cute romcom :)

woah, this idea sounds awesome! thanks so much for the request babe!! i’ll try my best to satisfy your pjo obsession hehehe

(also, i tweaked some junk like powers of the children of zeus and stuff just to make it easier, JUST PRETEND ITS CORRECT PLZ)

(thinking of adding original art to this IDK GIMME TIME)

prompt: you’re practicing archery and shoot alex, child of apollo, with a love arrow which leads to an accidental crush on you

no warnings! super cute and fluffy and romcom!!

________________________________________

part one ~

[listen at each star *]

it was a quiet spring morning. you were up and ready for your day and you decided that it would be perfect weather to practice your archery skills. you collected your materials and head off to your usual practice area.

you spruce up your target on the beautiful willow tree trunk in front of you and you begin.

you put your things out on your practice table in a neat manner. you play some of your “weird” non mythological music and begin.

**

you relax completely, hold up your bow and with a deep breath in, you let go.

plonk

“god.. that’s just terrible” you mumble to yourself as you spot the arrow almost a foot away from the practice board.

you draw back again and let go.

plonk

“no wonder i need the damn practice” you’re a bit annoyed seeing the arrow land in the grass at the base of the tree but continue to practice.

you draw back again, feeling a slight tingly vibration in your fingertips, and you knew this was a good sign. you were going to hit it right on the bullseye. the moment you begin to exhale, your music makes an odd doppler effect-like sound and it freaks you out a bit. you still absentmindedly let go of the arrow but don’t see where it landed.

“puta madre!”

a blood curdling shriek escapes you. you frantically try to hide from whoever it was that yelled.

a boy with dark hair came up from behind the willow tree and as soon as your eyes met, he holds both his hands up in defeat.

“don’t shoot, please!”

“dude, what the fuck are you doing here?! i almost had a heart attack! ew what’s wrong with your skin?” you made a face of disgust at him

“huh? look, i was just trying to find where that music was coming from and you shot me! like seriously, can you help me get this stupid arrow out of my ass?! god it’s like really deep in my butt meat”

“okay firstly, ew. secondly, ew.”

“im serious, can you give me a hand?” he pleaded, and as you approached him you noticed way too many things at once;

one: his skin was seriously looking freaky

two: he was a child of apollo, a sworn enemy of your eros parents

three: the arrow was really deep in his buttcheek

four: ….

“oh fuck me”

his skin was literally glowing. like… with love and junk.

you look down at the arrow you just removed from him and… oh no, how?!

you shot him with a love arrow. that’s just your luck, huh?

“hey… come here often sweetheart?” he smirked and you seriously had to choke down vomit

“really, that’s what you call flirting? you are such a little virgin boy”

“maybe you can change that” he holds your hand in his and pulls you in closer “maybe you want to put something else in my ass tonight besides that arrow” he smirked once again

you couldn’t believe the words he was saying to you.

you began laughing uncontrollably at his poor attempts at being suave and hot. you bent over laughing, you laughed so hard your abdomen was in absolute pain.

“see? i knew you’d come around, sexy lady” he pulled you up to be chest to chest with him

you quickly pushed him off and dried your tears from laughing so much.

“shut up dude, what even is your name? never mind, we need to get you a cure because i am definitely not going to deal with you and this… love crush thing” you began to collect your things in your backpack and you reached for the same arrow the raven haired menace did, as he was trying to help you.

“my name is alex… but you definitely have permission to call me papi” he said as your touching hands were intertwined in his and you quickly yanked your hand away

“blegh! you seriously need help, you creep! come on, we don’t have time to waste! our parents will absolutely kill us if they see us together” you yanked his arm to follow you and your head snapped at him as you heard a lewd moan come from alex.

“oh yeah, i love it when you’re rough baby” he moaned even louder and you plonked him in the head.

rolling your eyes, you continued to drag him to the only person who could help you out with no hesitation.

it took about fifteen agonizing minutes of walking to your friend thalia’s home as alex would not stop flirting with you and it wouldn’t be that bad of an issue but the dude had absolutely no game so it was just a lot of secondhand embarrassment you were dealing with.

you knocked on thalia’s door and prayed she was in.

thankfully, she opened the door a second later with a sweet smile,

“oh y/n! what a lovely surprise and… um excuse me what the actual frick is going on here??”

you pulled alex in and closed her door hurriedly.

“look man, i was practicing my archery right?”

“uh huh…” thalia replied

“because i simply suck balls at it right??”

“no you don’t darling! you’re a natural beauty and not to mention a talented one at that!” alex sighed, admiring you and inch from your face.

you shoved away his big head with your hand, and continued,

“and well… I SHOT THIS DUMBASS WITH A LOVE ARROW! PLEASE GIVE ME SOME KIND OF POTION THINGY TO FIX IT, PLEASE!” you beg thalia

“oh no! my honey is in distress! fear not, sweet maiden—”

thalia blows a green dust in his face and alex plops down on the ground like a sack of potatoes and he’s snoring away immediately.

“oh my god, thank you so so much! you don’t understand, he was literally like moaning all the way here and he calls that flirting?! he—”

“okay girl, do you need some eepy dust too?? just take a deep breath okay?”

you nod and calm down

“okay, as much as i know you need my help and as much as i want to help you, i can’t. we literally just ran out of the potion for that yesterday and i can’t make any new batches because im missing the main ingredient”

“well that’s okay! tell me where to get it and i’ll go right now and we can fix this whole mess and get rid of the buffoon!”

“no y/n, you don’t understand… the ingredient we need isn’t something you can just go get…”

you looked at her with a really confused face

“the ingredient is uh… spider legs, really weird i know! but you know the all mighty zeus, my pops, yeah he’s not as big and bad as he seems. he’s actually terrified of spiders so he banned them here in our world and i don’t get any spiders in stock until christmas because that’s the only time i can get my guy out here and… yeah”

“are you serious? god damn your dad and his arachnophobia..” i pinch the bridge of my nose in frustration

“yeah well, it’s either wait eight months for this potion or… get your father to undo the love spell”

i sigh and put my head down in my hands, feeling really defeated. what the hell do i do now?

“well… on the bright side, that dust i used on him will have some good effects when used alongside a love spell” thalia offers and you perk up

“wait really?? is he going to stop being so creepy with me?”

“well, maybe? it differs from person to person. but i do know that it most likely will make him act more in tune with his regular personality when he’s into someone, if that helps?” she smiled nervously

“let’s just hope he stops moaning every time i touch him” i say hopefully

“so.. you should probably try telling your dad. it was all a huge accident and i don’t think he’s going to be too upset. yeah he’ll probably give you the old ‘you need to be more responsible’ speech thing but im sure he’ll help you… unless he punishes you by not helping” thalia laughs deviously at the idea

“well thanks anyways, man. also, how long til he wakes up?” you ask, pointing at alex on the floor

“oh, one sec” thalia moves closer to him and kicks him in the balls

alex immediately shoots his eyes open and groans in pain

you look at thalia and the two of you laugh together.

thalia hands alex a pain reliever lollipop as a parting gift and you say your goodbyes to one another.

now it’s just you and alex.. and you were nervous about the way he was going to act with you.

“hey.. i uh, im really sorry about the way i was acting earlier. i seriously was acting super virgin-esque huh? i kinda heard everything you guys were saying even though i was asleep and yeah… but hey, at least now i’m not moaning at you like a harlot right now?” he laughed softly

“that’s so embarrassing that you heard us… but hey, at least you’re somewhat normal again?” you asked and offered him a smile

“i uh.. i never even asked for your name”

“oh, its y/n” you reply in a quiet voice

“that’s a really beautiful name… did i ever mention what my powers were?”

“no actually, you didn’t” you shook your head

“well, can i borrow your bow?” he asks sheepishly

you hesitantly nod and hand him your bow and a normal arrow

he places the arrow in its rightful position and comes up behind you. he’s still holding onto it as he places it in your hands. his arms are completely around you and his head is right next to yours.

“okay, relax. now, you see that small red flag thing on the tree over there? imagine the arrow landing right in the middle. take a deep breath” his hands were atop yours as he pulled the bow back and he whispered almost seductively,

“let go”

you both let the arrow go and it shoots right where you imagined it to. you gulped at how close he was to you. he smelled of pine and cinnamon. it was wonderful..

“you just needed a little push.. you did great y/n” he said in a low voice, still holding onto your hands on the bow

why did you want to lean in and kiss him?

wait, what?!

you immediately pulled away, putting as much space between the two of you as possible.

“y-yeah.. um thank you alex. should we keep going now?” you ask, unable to make eye contact with him

“whatever you’d like to do y/n. i’m honestly just enjoying your presence right now. it almost feels like it’s just you and me here, doesn’t it?”

you didnt know what to say. you agreed completely. you wanted nothing more than to waste your time with alex and his handsome smile and his sweet way with words and—

“y/n? can i show you my other power?” her broke the scary thoughts you were having

“sure”

**

alex began to sing the same song in was listening to earlier, without missing a single beat. how did he even know this song?

he took your hand and sung his heart out to you. you felt a swarm of butterflies flutter at the pit of your stomach. it feels like you were the one that got a love arrow stuck in your butt.

“your voice is beautiful… how do you know that song?” you asked, continuing to walk alongside alex

“well, i heard it a long time ago. sometimes i can hear it in my dreams, too. it’s not music we can listen to here, it’s mortal music i think. how do you know it?” he asked curiously

“i’ve always had an interest in mortal music.. i was actually playing that song this morning when the whole incident happened, i think you may have interfered with the sound waves when you were trying to find where it was coming from”

“that’s right… i guess this is our song then, huh?” he stated, grabbing me gently by the arm as we stopped in our tracks

“yeah, i guess so” your face was gently raised up by alex’s fingertips, forcing you to look into his entrancing brown eyes

“y/n, are you sure you’re not a siren?” alex whispered, his lips practically touching your lips

“w-what?..”

“it feels like you’re luring me to my sweet demise.. and what’s a death sentence without me being given a last meal? please, let me taste your lips before you take my soul away. it would make me feel oh so complete in this bittersweet end” he claimed proudly

with a flutter of your eyes, you shut them softly and gently press your lips against his

you feel his arms wrap around you in a tight but gentle way, and you reciprocated by holding his torso tightly

your hands grip his shirt tightly in fists as alex deepens the kiss, a small whimper leaving his soon to be bruised lips

alex pulls away and says softly,

“i can die a happy man now, y/n”

you had no idea what just happened or how it happened or even why you let it happen???

there was just something about him that lured you in. you wanted to take him in in every way possible, because to consume him would mean to be one.

god, what the hell were you even thinking?

[TO BE CONTINUED]

[meetevieinthehallway]

please i beg of you to do a period comfort fic please please your comfort/fluff stuff is so amazing

maybe something where lovies in a lot of pain and is just super reliant on harry bc of the pain and he’s super sweet and gentle with her and comforting

PLEASE PLEASE

FIRST LIL WRITING AFTER A LONG WHILE!!! bear w me pls, im rusty :D

-

she doesn’t want to do this.

it could have been a worse time, she supposes— it’s not as if they were at one of harry’s a-list events where her smile would most obviously quiver from the pain and bring her abdomen to her feet, where his eyes would snap to hers with worry at the first strained sigh in her throat. but, what she does know is that she didn’t want this to happen, not now.

ever since she stopped flooding her body with birth control in a preliminary effort to try for a child, her periods have hit her like tidal waves. pain is not the word, but torture, even, and she is not one for melodrama but it all just feels so suffocating and burning and red and just god— OW.

the cramps are like knives to the skin and she’s even started to get lightheaded now between the pendulum of her moods and it all just feels so dramatic but she also knows that she’s not intending to be. and it’s exactly what she’s feeling now, because as she stands up from the oven she winces, flinches, as if electrocuted in her abdomen, and it’s a miracle that the pan had made it to the stovetop without scorching her feet as it hits the floor. and the heat from the cookies just laying there innocently is too much, all at once, and she lets out a hiss when another stab comes to her pelvis.

“fuck,” she mutters, throwing the oven mit next to the tray, her other arm coming to wrap around herself. she fumbles, clumsy feet moving to the bar stool closest to her, and just as she sits another hits, less harsh but enough to make the air in her lungs to run for cover outside of her heating body.

and of course, of fucking course, she has barely anytime to think—as if she could even attempt with the onset of a swirling vision and a pounding headache drumming at her temples—before harry waltzes in on light feet and a boyish smile decorating his face.

“ready t’go, bird?” by the time he finishes the question, his eyebrows are starting to pinch as he drinks in his wife’s expression: eyes closed, shallow breathing, her own brow furrowed in something of pain and anguish. her arms are glued to her stomach, too, which he recognizes immediately, and he clicks his tongue once. “you okay, love?” he moves to stand in front of where she sits, leaning down to meet his eyes to her closed ones. he brushes a strand of hair from her forehead, starting to dampen from the heat from her forehead.

“yeah, yeah.” she says softly, her eyes opening to meet his, glassy and pained against the green that looks at her with concern.

“y’feel dizzy? let’s get you upstairs and i’ll run you a bath?” he says it quietly, his hand coming to the top of her head in a gentle rub of her hair, and he watches her melt into the touch slightly.

“no.” she breathes, “no, no, we… we should be going soon.” her eyes open fully now, and start to pace themselves across his face and the kitchen.

“love, you are white as a ghost and as hot as the sun.” he says softly, “let me draw you a bath, kay? or would you rather lay down, hm?”

his voice melts her shoulders like butter, but it doesn’t distract from the pain threatening to shatter her to pieces.

“no, i-i, let’s go. i’ll take some midol in the car, and—”

“it’s okay, sweet. we’re staying here.”

“no!” she musters enough to say it stubbornly, and she watches his brow droop deeper and his frown widen into his cheeks. “i’m not missing your mum’s party. it’s— it’s just a stupid period, a-and it’ll pass—”. her argument weakens the more she speaks and the more waves of heat crash into her, breaking her syllables into sad attempts of words. he shakes his head at her, swallowing an endeared smile at his wife’s notorious stubbornness.

“c’mon, baby love. let’s get you comfy.”

he learned a long time ago that there isn’t a compromise when it comes to his wife’s periods. he’s never seen anything like it— the 4 full days of pain and whimpering and sleeping and bouts of eating everything or nothing at all— but he knows now what she needs. one faint in the too-hot shower a couple months back was all he needed to learn this time like memorizing a textbook. he feels saddened for her, too, as it strips her away from the world for a bit, and god does he wish he could soak that pain into his own pelvis and head just to give her a break. harry hates to see his own little love like this, crippled by discomfort.

“i’m so tired of this,” she sighs, eyes welling in an all-too-familiar hormonal emotion.

“i know,” he says, his hand coming to hold her cheek, pressing his cool skin into her blotchy face. “’s okay, though. mum will understand, i promise.”

and he’s successful in his knowledge, too, because she opens her fluttering eyes to gaze up at him sadly, a pout forming across her cheeks.

“but what about my cookies?”

he looks over his shoulder to see the pan resting on the stovetop, still steaming with heat and chocolate oozing out the sides.

“they’re her recipe. was so excited to show her.” her voice is defeated, and harry snorts.

“i am sure they will find a happy home in m’own stomach, bug. will make sure to send a yelp review her way.”

and at this she chuckles for a moment, before wincing, and it’s then that he scoops her up into his arms like a child, ignoring her soft protests. he kisses her on the forehead with a wet pucker as he moves to ascend their staircase, and by the time they reach the top she’s still attempting to convince him— can we please just go? i’ll be fine, i swear. i— ow, i-i, c’mon h… i really don’t want to miss it!

but his curls flop between his eyes and he smiles at her, softly shushing her panicked suggestions. she knows she has lost, though, because another stab comes through her stomach and she jolts, eyes watering. she sighs, letting her weight fall completely in his hold.

“bed or bath, little love?”

[bvannn]

Weekly update August 16, 2024

Well so much for taking a rest week? I ended up getting a lot done! I finished and released a song, took a good bite out of a few more, and finished up a comic page! I’m also rethinking a couple project plans.

So I’ve been on Newgrounds a bunch this week, since when I went to check how my song was doing, I saw they revamped their mobile layout, and browsing is fun again, especially browsing music! I’m not one to watch many movies on the site, but I’m hoping to change that soon. After getting one song done and getting closer to finishing up some more (plus OEB still being in the back), I kinda want to get a video out. The OEB video I have planned is a bit ambitious I realize, so I might put it on hold or can it completely in favor of some simpler videos. Probably just on hold, I’ll fiddle with the storyboards I have to see how bad they really are.

For the music itself, RR is completely tuned and just needs to vocals added to the mix, BATB is done and re-mastered and everything just needs vocals, I re-mastered WOTW and decided it will need new vocals but otherwise is good to go (and will probably be my next music video choice), plus some instrumental tracks. Two now are ready to go just need visuals, which I’ll try to do this week, I’ll fiddle with after effects again for those but won’t be full videos.

Comic going well, is now 27% done. I’m hoping this weekend I’ll get to go through my paper drawings from the last few months and import all the OEB storyboards and comic panels. Im really proud of how certain effects look in the panels, since I’m trying not to overdo it but still have certain things come across. Not every panel needs to be an illustration, most don’t actually. Also been rereading through the thumbnails and man this is going to be so fun when it’s all done! I’ll try to pick up the pace!

Epithet TTRPG stuff: balancing statblocks is hard because there isn’t a ‘monster manual’ to base them on, but I’ve been doing math about it and getting a good baseline for how to do encounters. I’ve wanted to do YouTube videos to give a tutorial on how to build characters in the system, if I do, then maybe I’ll do a dming guide as well once I test the encounters.

Tomorrow I’m planning to take a bit of a rest day again, just try importing a bunch of stuff I’ve drawn traditionally. After that I’ll try to get back to comic work with some animation stuff on the side. Might do a drawing or two tonight if I’m feeling okay after plasma. Last time I bled too much and had to go on a goose chase for a second bandage though so no promises!

[obsoleteozymandias]

heya! :D was wondering if id be able to get a matchup from resident evil pls c: i hope im doing all of this right lol

im a straight female (she/her)

appearance: im 5’7”. im a light blonde, occasionally I’ll whack some brown or hot pink through the underneath when I’m bored of the plain one colour. im v into fashion and what not but my style varies day to day. i like to experiment with it. that being said, im usually here for anything that fits in the boxes of emo or hyper feminine though, as much as they contrast one another. 🤧 i wear a lot of makeup, and i do that purely for myself lol. I hate when people say they can’t even tell I’m wearing it considering it takes me sooo long haha. i have glasses but most of the time when i go out i wear contacts.

personality: to sum it up nicely, i never ever shut up. im very loud and extroverted. (the only exception to this is if I’m tired, then i go dead quiet.) humour is a big thing for me to be able to get on with someone. i have a very very strong moral code. i have a tendency to jump straight to people’s rescue if i see something wrong and I’m told that sometimes that gets me into more trouble than it’s worth. i try to be optimistic but i can be a massively emotional drama queen so it occasionally does fail tbh. i don’t exactly like bothering people with my problems either. im a creative person first and foremost. however, i have some “theoretical” intelligence yet completely, totally lack common sense. if you believe anything to do with star signs you will not be surprised to know im a sagittarius ‘:D

i don’t think i have a specific type. im not physically affectionate with friends but definitely would be with a partner. i like someone who knows how to flirt a little, maybe? and just like someone caring because kindness is such a huge thing for me.

i draw a ton, i make ocs and stories, i’ll throw myself headfirst into any artistic hobbies at least once to try it really. also, massively into music. listening to it anyway, i can’t play any instruments or anything. i love rock / pop punk bands, i love pop & kpop, i just… love music. a lot. i do everything with my headphones.

i believeeee that is all :p thank you for taking my request!

👍

== Resident Evil ==>

I match you up with…

Carlos Oliveira

Extrovert x Extrovert type beat 

Carlos probably meets you while trying to stop you from throwing yourself into danger. He gets it, he really does, and he truthfully admires how you’ll fight tooth and nail for your beliefs, but leave the fighting to him for now, okay? 

Don’t worry, he’ll teach you all about fighting if need be. He can see the desire to do good and to stand up for yourself, and he’s admittedly a bit flustered by your passion (it’s very attractive). 

After getting in a relationship, he trusts you more to take care of both yourself and him, but he’s always on edge when you’re away, so you often come home to a big armful of man and his kisses and whispers about how much he misses you. 

He’ll be the street smarts in this relatiponship, constantly watching your back and keeping track of you. Yet you surprise him with your creativity and problem solving enough that it sort of balances out?  

He’s always ready to chat with you, whether it be about work or your thoughts and opinions on the most random of topics.

Carlos will enjoy time where just the two of you hang out and listen to music. I imagine you’ve got different tastes genre wise, but similar tonally. Sometimes you two go on a drive just to listen to some music and joke with one another. 

He’s your savior, in more ways than one, but the feeling is absolutely reciprocated.  

[specialagentlokitty]

Saul Silva/Farah x Student!reader - don’t need saving

Also, can I please get a part 3 to Don't Need Saving? Where they discover the reader so powerful, and just love training with her? ❤️❤️ - @casserole-from-dads-asserole 💜

Part three:

They wanted to know how powerful you were, so they took you to the river to figure out the true extent of your power.

“Can you freeze the river?” Silva asked.

“I can try.”

You held your hand out, clutching your fingers together to make a fist and there was a loud crack as ice started to spread across the water.

You watched as it connect from shore to shore, and you looked at both of the teachers.

“How deep does it go?” Farah asked you.

“Uhm.. I dunno.”

You looked down and lowered your hand walking over you placed your foot on the ice and it seemed okay, so you slowly stepped on it.

You slid a little, and you quickly found your balance again.

“I can walk on it.”

“So pretty deep then.”

Farah wrote that down.

You shuffled a little to stay stood up, but you slipped and you fell back with a thud.

“Are you okay?!” They rushed out.

“Im good.”

You sat up, rubbing your back and they both reached out to pull you back onto the shore, and you released your hold of your magic.

The ice slowly melted until it was just water again.

“You can make snow right?” Silva asked.

“Not so much snow, more really fine ice, it sets like snow though, buts it’s ice.”

You showed them more things you could do and there was one pressing matter in their minds.

“How much water can you summon?” Farah asked.

This was the burning question, the real test of your ability and what you could actually do.

You took a deep breath, closing your eyes as you moved your hands, the river behind you ripped, and the water rose from the surrounding plant life.

You guided the water around them, swirling it around, eyes closed as you focused on your breathing.

For this much control you needed to be focused, ready.

Farah and Silva looked at the water rippling against the sunlight as it got larger and larger.

It swirled around them and rose up, water still gathering in what could only be described as a funnel around them and it towered into the sky.

“Wow..” Silva breathed out.

“That’s incredible (Y/N), and you can still draw more?” Farah asked you.

“Yes, I can.”

She nodded and wrote it down, taking a few photos before she nodded to herself again.

“That’s perfect thank you.”

You slowly released the water back to wherever it had come from until it was all back and you opened your eyes.

You brought your hand up to your nose, and wiped a little bit of blood.

“It looks like you’re body isn’t quite ready for that kind of power yet.” Silva said.

He walked over and handed you a tissue and you thanked him as you cleaned your nose before looking at them both.

“I’ll be honest, I don’t know if I have anything I could teach you (Y/N).” Farah smiled.

“Well that sucks.” You laughed.

She rolled her eyes.

“Don’t get so happy, since we can’t teach you anything, maybe we could train you like I do with the specialists.” Silva said.

You looked at him a little confused.

“Sort of like defensive scenarios. We know you can attack, but you seem to run straight to the attack not the defend part of your magic, so we’ll work on that.”

“Oh, okay. When does that start?”

“Give us a week.” Farah smiled.

You nodded and padded over to the river, stepped on the water as you walked away and they rolled their eyes.

You were a show off and you knew it.

When it came to train with you, they explained what it is they wanted to do.

Silva had some fake arrows, they wouldn’t hurt, they would just bounced off you if they hit you, and you were to protect yourself from him.

It was pretty easy to do, you created barriers of water, ice and swept the arrows before they could reach you.

It only took a few days for the teachers to realise this wasn’t much of a challenge.

So then you had to protect Farah while he tried to hit her, but again, it was too easy and you were having no trouble keeping her safe.

So they had so come up with something else, and that’s what they did.

They rounded up some students and stood them in a large circle.

“You need to try guess and protect which one I’m going to hit, but you can’t protect them all at once, only one.” Silva explained.

“Okay, seems simple enough.”

It wasn’t simple, because he had the upper hand, he knew what he was going to do, you didn’t, so even if you thought you made the right choice it wasn’t.

“Focus on my movements (Y/N), watch what I do.”

You nodded your head, and you still kept missing.

“Just breathe, clear your mind.” Farah said.

She walked behind you and you nodded, taking a deep breath.

“There moister in the air, let it guide you, be your sense. When he fires that arrow, moves, you can feel it in the water under your control.” She whispered.

You nodded your head again.

Focusing on the water in the air, and on the ground, when he stepped you could it disturb your magic, and when he realised his arrow you threw your hands up.

The arrow bounced harmless of the ice wall in front of Sky.

“Yes!” You cheered.

The students cheered with you and Silva laughed.

“I was going easy on you.”

“Bring it Silva.”

He kept going, and you eventually got the hang of it, you knew where he was going to go, your magic helping you.

And eventually he couldn’t land another hit on any of the students.

“You learn quickly.” He said.

“I have some pretty good teachers.” You smiled.

The students were dismissed and they both smiled and nodded at you.

You would keep this training for a few weeks, then they would find something else for you to learn, and you’d kept to that for a while.

And they loved training with you, because you were a quick learner, and you were creative, you didn’t stick to the same things and you changed it up, making it harder for them

[specksizedgoddess]

anything bigger than a rodent would basically be a deity to you, since you’re so small!

you take shelter in an abandoned barn for the night and you’ve just found a comfortable spot when you see eyes shining down at you from the rafters. you get ready to run but before you can even stand up, something that looks like a stray cat jumps down, and you realize as she stalks closer to you just how big she is compared to you and how little she looks like a normal cat - the smell of smoke and glowing red eyes make it clear she has an air of magic about her.

it’s easy enough for her to pin you under a paw, flexing her claws into you just enough to stop you from squirming. she’s very amused by your frantic attempts to kiss her feet, and she thinks the way you yelp when she presses her claws into you, drawing just a bit of blood, is really cute, so she settles down, keeping you under a paw as she lays down in the dirt and eyes you curiously.

she tells you she will eat you no matter how much you beg, but not until you bore her, and you’ve been very interesting so far. her voice is beautiful, like running water and bells, and it’s dark enough it’s hard to tell where her black and white fur ends and her shadow begins.

you talk for a while before you run out of things to say, and she looks at you with a hungry glint in her eye. her tongue is wider than you and rough, and you feel every spine on it as she slowly tastes you, licking all the way up your body in a slow stroke that leaves you damp and begging for more.

she finds your reaction funny, so she does it a few more times, all the while talking about how hungry she is and how well you’ll satisfy her appetite. she won’t accept your desperate negotiating, though. tiny little creatures like you were just meant to be eaten, after all! you didn’t react fast enough or run far enough and now you’re dinner! that’s just how it works!

she can tell you’re enjoying being treated this way, and she promises you she’ll go nice and slowly when she eats you so you feel it all - and she’ll spend extra time between your legs with that tongue you liked so much! maybe she’ll even let you finish before she bites it off!

you seem surprised when she retracts her claws and lifts her paw a bit, but she’s not letting you go, just allowing you to run a bit, “to make it more fun for me,” she explains before leaning down and whispering in your ear, just before teasingly biting it,

“maybe if you make it fun enough i’ll bring you back and let you try to escape me again…”

I. I REALLY LOVE THIS IDEA ACTUALLY AGDHSHDGHSAHDA

Pinned beneath her... eagerly kissing her oaws as she looks at me curiously- eyes piercing into me like she KNOWS how obsessed I am... yelps devolving into moans as she traces her claws against me...

I can only imagine her amusement when I moan as she tells me what I'll be- how exited I am to be just a meal for her, her little laugh~

Telling her everything I can think of... trying to be a good storyteller, to keep her entertained- telling her all the stories of what an infinitely regenerating speck has gotten into over the years~

And. GOD. IM. IM SO NORMAL ABOUT THE UM "maybe she'll even let you finish before she bites it off!" comment you made~ I need to feel her rough tongue against my naked body...

I'll run, really... but she knows my hearts not in it. Waiting until I've almost left the barn, seeing how I falter- how I refuse to leave the barn... how I could have tried to escape for real, but I couldn't~ because I knew I was meant to be cat food~

and GOD we can't gloss over that first little line of yours- "anything bigger then a rodent would basically be a god to you~"

FUCK I need to worship ordinary critterls like gods~ teased and toyed with like this cat~

[diaborodevil]

Manaless

Beasts take on many forms some are disproportionate while others are oddly perfect some retain a humanoid shape while others have drastically different forms some even grow scales or feathers some even grow more limbs

Catherine:

Carlos: but a commonality between beasts is that they usually have a tail

Catherine: okay wait a what

(Catherine looks and sees that there is obviously a tail)

Catherine: oh great fathers oh great fathers I have a tail

Carlos: calm down calm down uh that’s the last thing you tell them

Catherine: ahhhhhhh

Carlos: hey hey uh look

(Carlos turns around lifting his robe to reveal a small tail)

Carlos: see your not the only one here with a tail

Catherine: why are you telling me all this stuff

Carlos: it’s to ease the fact that your now a different type of human

Catherine: give me a mirror

Carlos: what

Catherine: GIVE ME A MIRROR

Carlos: woah bad idea last time I gave someone a mirror they freaked out badly

Catherine: grrrr hmph

Carlos: okay your decision just don’t freak out

(Carlos proceeds to hand Catherine a mirror as she takes a long look at her reflection)

Catherine: GREAT FATHERS IM

Carlos:

Catherine: oh yeah no freaking out wait a minute am I ah don’t look at me

(Carlos proceeds to turn towards the cave entrance takes a book from his back and looks through the pages)

Carlos: hm what page was it aw there it is

Catherine: where what is

(Carlos turns around eyes closed and aims his staff)

Carlos: fabricate clo thing

(Suddenly a toga like outfit appears on Catherine)

Catherine: huh

Carlos: did it work can I look

Catherine: uh yeah why is it an outfit like this though

Carlos: beasts are random so beasts clothes are hard to make also being asymmetric makes it’s harder

Catherine: asymmetric

Carlos: all your limbs are different sizes

Catherine: are they

Carlos: enough chit chat (Carlos pulls his hood up) if you don’t want to get caught it’s probably best to follow me

Catherine: no I think I’ll stay in this cave

Carlos: they’ll find you eventually and there isn’t much

Catherine: where are you headed

Carlos: new leaf I got a horse and wagon there then it’s off to cyeris

Catherine: okay I’ll follow

Carlos: stand still

Catherine: what

Carlos: I can hear you reveal yourselfs

(Pan up to the top of a cliff some distance away)

Kyle: seems like someone beat us to the punch

Herry: do you really think he heard us

Kyle: no he’s probably trying to scare us

Carlos: hey stop the chitchat I can hear you

Catherine: wait are those oh hey there my friends maybe they’ll understand

(A fireball flys past her face)

Catherine: eep

Carlos: they aren’t currently your friends run

Catherine:

Carlos: RUN

Kyle: oh my god he must be insane thinking he can converse with a beast

Herry: then you better beat it out of him

(Kyle jumps down the cliff towards the bottom of the cliff and draws a sword)

Kyle: you are in our way from helping our friend

Carlos: how do you plan on doing that there’s only two options for beasts slavery or execution

Kyle: we’ll figure something out

Carlos: well I started helping her first so get in line

Kyle: you think your qualified

Carlos more qualified then you

Kyle: oh I’ll show you qualified

(Kyle tries to strike Carlos with his sword while Carlos keeps blocking it)

Kyle: just let me hit you

Carlos: no way pal

(Carlos tries to hit Kyle with his staff but Kyle keeps dodging)

Kyle: this is taking to long igneous burst

Carlos: oh so you a fire mage is that all you got

Kyle: it isn’t cocytus flow

(Suddenly a trail of ice forms causing Carlos to jump as Carlos lands his hood falls off)

Kyle: so it is true your mother is a beast

10 years ago

Kyle: I can’t wait once you become a mage you can pay for me to become one early

Grace: that’s right sweety it’ll be easy just wai

Arch mage: are you ready for the enlightenment process

Grace: I am

Arch mage: it should be a quick process

Grace: what what’s happening to me

Arch mage: uh uhhhh

(The arch mage passes out)

Kyle: mom mom are you still there

Grace: rawr rawr ruh rawwr

Kyle: don’t worry I’ll help you

Later

Arch mage: uh what happened wait did your mother

Kyle: yes she ran into the woods

Arch mage: I’m sorry at least you have your father

Kyle: yeah

A week later

Howard: if only you were still here grace I need you wait a minute I hear something in the shed

Grace: grawr

Howard: ahhh

Elsewhere

Herry: wow that’s a lot of guards

Kyle: yeah going towards the lower class section

Catherine: oh isn’t your dad supposed to be home early today

Herry: hey where are you going

Kyle’s home

Kyle: dad what happened

Howard: there was a beast in the shed but the guards were able to take care of it it’s okay

Kyle: yeah it’s okay

3 years later

Kyle: hey mom it’s me

Grace: grawr

Kyle: things have been going okay dad is still single says you were the only one for him

Grace: raw

Kyle: I’m trying my best but it’s hard to keep going on with you in here it’s hard

7 years later

Kyle: hey mom it’s it’s finally time for me to officially become a mage can you believe it

Grace: rawr

Kyle: I’ll I’ll let you know how it goes

Back to now

Carlos: are are you crying

Kyle: I I can’t imagine how it feels growing up with a beast as a mother your entire life

Five years ago

Carlos: are you sure it’s a good idea for me to become a mage what if they find out what I am

Sean: it’ll be fine I believe in yeah ain’t that right sweetie

Sera: reahhhhhhh

Carlos: your right mom I’ll do it

Sean: still so hard to believe you can understand her

Later

Arch mage: are you ready

Carlos: I am uh uhhhhhh

Later

Arch mage: I can’t believe it he’s he’s

Doctor: he’s half beast

Arch mage: that means one of his parents must be a beast

Later

Arch mage: look at this man procreating with a beast

Sean: no it’s not like that

Arch mage: and look at this abomination guards take him away

Carlos: augh

Sera: GRRRREAWWWWWWWWWWWWH

Arch mage: despicable take the beast away

Sera: reahhh

Carlos: mom

Sera: CARLOS

Carlos: mommm

Sean: run Carlos run

Present

Carlos: wait where did the other guy go Catherine *inhale* *exhale* enhance beast

Kyle: huh hey where are you going wait how does he know wait earlier he said can he wait he’s getting away uhhhh

Carlos: I am not failing another person I can’t fail any more people

Further in the forest

Herry: can we truly help her wait how is he moving so fast

Carlos: stay away from her

Herry: you don’t know what you’re doing

Carlos: neither do you

Herry: what do you mean

Carlos: you really think catching her is the best course of action taking away her freedom

Herry: she’s out of control so she must be contained

Carlos: wow the church really has you hypnotized

Herry: silence half beast

Carlos: do you know what beast I’m half of

Herry: what do you mean

Carlos: I am Carlos Mcklaine the prince of sheep

Kyle: Herry catch him

Herry: he’s he’s the

Kyle: the what

Herry: he’s the prince of sheep

Kyle: what does that mean

Herry: it means his mother is a strong beast

Kyle: that doesn’t change anything we need him him out of the way to catch Catherine

Carlos: take me on illuminos Maximus

Kyle and Herry: augh

Kyle: uh we lost them

Later

Carlos: hey are you in there

Catherine: yeah why would they

Carlos: normal people can’t understand beast I can but that’s cause I’m half n half but I uh got my wagon if your ready to start heading towards cyeris

Catherine: uh yeah I am

Carlos: it’s been a crazy day so you might want to get some rest

Westloft slave barracks

Kyle: hey mom I’m sorry for not coming yesterday it’s just things have been crazy but it finally happened I’m a mage now

Grace: rawh

Kyle: but my friend turned into a beast

Grace: reaah

Kyle: have you heard of the queen of sheep

Grace: rah

Kyle: well I met someone who might be son to a beast and I think he might be able to understand beasts

Grace: rar

Kyle: so hopefully I can save my friend and convince that guy to allow us to have a full conversation

Grace: reeah

Kyle: I’m sorry but it might be a while till our next conversation I love you mom

And that is that wew

[in-my-feels-probably]

im here to congratulate you on 1.5 followers, you deserve it and much more! 🩶 but also, id like to ask for an option two of your event for harry potter (marauders or slytherin boys, romantically) im a slytherin with intp personality. im 5'7 with wavy dark blonde hair and i wear glasses. so, im an introverted and easygoing person (but id say im in constant stress at this point 😭), i enjoy making people around me laugh - which include a lot of sarcastic comments - and have a good time. im loyal and independent, dont like giving satisfaction to random people. my likes include absolutally any type of art - and i practice some dancing, drawing and painting myself -, fashion - even though my style is not specific, it just goes according to my mood -, rock music, horror movies, plushies and nature. in a relationship the most important topic to me would be ✨belonging✨ - i have some trust issues, so its essential to feel that its genuine and mutual connection. also, my giving love languages are gift giving and quality time. (sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes, english is not my first language) thanks!

hi!

thanks for participating :)

i ship you with theo!

while i think theo can hold his own in group settings and act confident, i don’t think he’s that much of a people person. i think he has a short social battery, and he kinda checks out and is a little detached. he’s ambiverted for sure. i think he’d understand your sense of independence, and he’d know how important alone time away from the group to give yourself a chance to recuperate is. he’d be drawn to you purely based off that, but also because of your sarcasm. he’s SO good at banter and sarcasm, and he’d enjoy talking to someone on his level. he’d also love how you like to make people laugh. he could do with some cheering up, and knowing that you were actively trying to make his and other peoples day better would be a really sweet sentiment to him.

i feel like theo would be good at all types of art. he can probably draw really well, and he has a good sense of style. he’s got a good eye for detail and beauty, and he’d find your interest in it endearing. above any art form, i think music is his favorite. he’d get really excited if you listened to the same artists as him.

theo’s definitely got some abandonment issues. it probably stems from his family and home life, and he just never shook it as he got older. it would take a lot for him to trust someone and get comfortable, so he’d really value you opening up to him and being patient with him. you’d understand how he felt, and he’d really value having someone like that around. i think his main love language is also quality time, so he’d be happy to just be with you doing whatever entertained you.

—

after a round of exams, one of the houses would throw a party to celebrate. half the castle would come, and it would be really loud and crowded. as they headed to the common rooms, you decided to sit out for a while in the courtyard while it was empty. you’d draw to pass the time until you were ready to go back in.

theo would find you out there when he came to smoke. he’d sit next to you in silence, knocking his knee against yours.

“not in the mood for a party?” you’d ask, looking over at him.

he’d shake his head, putting his cigarette out. “and have firewhiskey sloshed all over me by those drunk dickheads? i think i’ll pass, love.”

you’d chuckle, turning back to your sketch. he’d shift to rest his head on your shoulder, watching as you continued your drawing. it would be peaceful for a moment, a comfortable silence between you both. finally, you’d set your things down, turning to him.

“i think one of us should go rescue pansy,” you said before clearing your throat. “she’s all alone with the boys. i feel bad.”

he’d chuckle against your shoulder. “pansy is never in need of rescuing.”

“maybe,” you’d say, standing up after gathering your things.

you’d offer your hand to him, making him let out a sigh. but he’d take your hand away, groaning as you helped him up.

“am i not enough company for you, love?” he’d ask, hooking his arm around your shoulders. “you’d rather have firewhiskey sloshed all over you than sit out here with me?”

you’d laugh, leaning into his side. “i’d rather it be firewhiskey than getting chewed out by pansy later.”

as you started your walk back to the common room, you’d reach for his hand again, giving it a squeeze.

“and, to answer your question—no. i wouldn’t rather have firewhiskey sloshed all over me than sitting with you. that’s why i’m dragging you with me. we’ll do it together.”

he’d squeeze your hand tight, grinning down at you as you walked together. “fine—but only because i don’t want you getting chewed out by pansy. no other reason.”

“sure, darling. sure.”

—

thanks again for participating! i hope you liked this :)

[tonberry-yoda]

Hi could I get a romantic matchup for Haikyuu

Pronouns are she/her and I have a preference for men. Could I also ask for a mini fic of any kind like whatever you think of. I’m not sure if it’s part of this specific event but it was on your matchup rules. If not that’s totally fine!

Also please let me know if I forgot to include something!

Ideal First date: My dream date is probably at an amusement park (Disneyland maybe) because it was the highlight of my childhood and allows me to not act like I have a stick up my ass all the time and have fun LMAO. I’d prefer it over just a dinner date or a movie because it’s more fun. I also just think amusement parks are romantic and in a sucker for cute fluffy cliche stuff. In general though I would enjoy any date that shows that he put thought and effort into it and actually values the time I’m spending with him. (Like instead of just saying “let’s hang out. What do you want to do”, be like “hey when are you available this week? Saturday? Ok be ready at 7 on Saturday”. I like that because it shows initiative and interest). Also if we are meeting each other somewhere don’t be late I will leave. So overall any date that’s fun, shows effort, interest, and shows that he actually took the time to think about my personality and what I’d like.

Personality: INTJ 3w4. I’m introverted and calm most of the time. I can be socially awkward but if I prepare myself or plan beforehand I can be very charming. I'm really analytical and am good at finding loopholes and working around problems under pressure. But I can also overthink a lot of things and plan out too much of my interactions with people. I'm not good with emotional support and can come across a little cold because of that but I usually try my best to understand the other person and their needs. I hate small talk and I like people who are blunt and logical but also have emotional intelligence. However, I cannot deal with overly emotional people who are extremely dramatic and make a big deal of their feelings when a situation can be logically resolved much more quickly and peacefully. I'm not that expressive (outwardly at least because I'm actually really emotional I just hide it well) and have a hard time relaxing or enjoying things because I've been conditioned to always consider how it will look on mine and my family's reputation. I'm a perfectionist and hold myself to very high standards and I can sometimes be very critical of others because of my high expectations. I constantly chase perfection for myself and try to be the most idealized version of myself but these standards cause me to be extremely hard on myself when it comes to falling short of my expectations or making mistakes. I’m very understanding, fair, and extremely loyal. I’d literally take a bullet for my friends but I also expect the same kind of loyalty in return. I’m very devoted to my principles and can often have a hard time forgiving people if they do something I find to be fundamentally wrong according to my principles. I have trust issues with romance but when I fall in love I fall really hard and I’m very romantic (im a songwriter so I’ll literally write lyrics about them and draw them and stuff). A lot of people don’t realize how deeply I feel things because I don’t show it on the surface. I’ve also been told I seem intimidating until someone gets to know me. Some of my dealbreakers are: misogyny (when people especially men undermine my intelligence and experience and end up making a mistake I warned them about only to listen when another man repeats the same thing l've been saying since the beginning), big egos with nothing to back it up, people who can't keep up with me (I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone whose hand I have to hold all the time. They need to be on the same level/wavelength as me and not drag me down), being a coward and not standing up for your own beliefs/motives, people that are way too nice (whoever I end up with has to have a mean streak because it shows they are able to take action when needed. How are they going to support and protect me if they can’t even stand up for themselves when needed.), being self absorbed and not considering the consequences of your actions, people who have a moral superiority complex that think they're better for not wanting to break rules to get what they want, and people who can't take responsibility for their actions. (I would respect someone whose honest about being a bad person a lot more than I respect someone who tries to come across as kind and caring all the time no matter what. It’s like that Jack sparrow quote, “I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly, it's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly stupid”. I fully agree with him. I also have a short temper when people act like the things I mentioned, or if I’m in a situation where people are being inefficient or wasting my time but if people communicate effectively I’ll be very patient and help them come up with a way to deal with their situation.

Hobbies/ Likes: I love music. I make my own music and music is probably the thing I love the most. It's really what I use to process the world so music is definitely the way to my heart. My all time favorite band is Buck-Tick and I love dark wave/goth music like Depeche Mode. However I literally listen to everything so it’s hard to say a single genre I like more than others. I can't play any instruments but I also make my own music. (Shameless self promo but here’s my new song) I'm a good artist but I don't like doing it on a deadline. I've gotten back into drawing recently tho. I've also been doing martial arts since I was 7 + fencing. I'm good at chess and poker and made money from playing/betting on games when I was younger. I also love reading.

I love fashion and ive been modeling since I was 14. I also did some pageants as a kid. As for my style, I can’t pick a specific vibe or aesthetic because I think I’m simultaneously goth, preppy, athletic, and nerdy. It just depends on how I feel. The only common trait is whatever I wear will always look great😌. I tend to wear darker colors though but I also really like y2k and I have a bunch of lavender juicy tracksuits and stuff (I love purple). I also switch between wanting to look more masculine and androgynous or more glam and feminine. Sometimes I think of a song I want to look like and pick an outfit based on the song. My style is very bold and sometimes flamboyant and I love being admired and complimented. I may not be very social but I instead attract attention with how I present myself. I’m Indian but a lot of people have said I look like Atsushi Sakurai when he was younger.

I don’t want to be paired with nishinoya, tanaka, or hinata I don’t think I’d get along with them that well.

notes 💌: GURL I LOVE YOUR CONFIDENCE OMG! I love seeing confident people like you and btw that song SLAPS! Cant wait to see what else you make in the future!! thanks so much for participating in my event and i hope you have an amazing valentine's day this year!! <3

THE CHARACTER CUPID CHOOSES FOR YOU THIS VALENTINE’S DAY IS…

KUROO!!

he's kinda the opposite when it comes to you being introverted

he is definitely not a shy guy

he's super social, but he will NEVER force you into a social situation if you dont want any part of it

he likes that you have a charming side. and he especially likes that you have that charming side around him <3

HE LOVES THAT YOU ARE SO PREPARED FOR SITUATIONS

like seeing you be this very prepares and thoughtful person has him head over heels for you

he finds that part about you very attractive

he will definitely encourage you not to overthink though

overthinking can be AWFUL and leave nothing but bad thoughts sometimes, so he sure can help when you think you've bumped into a really bad area in your overthinking journey

he is just always here for you

luckily, you dont really need to worry about his emotional health, he knows how to handle when things go downhill, but know that if he really needs your help, he will ask

he will support you if you do the same as a relationship should be

he very much has his shit together

he is very logical and emotionally intelligent so you have a good man on your hands

he is super calm about his feelings and again, knows how to deal with bad situations on his own

he knows that you have a perfectionist side about you and sometimes you two can butt heads because of it

mostly because he doesnt want you thinking that you need to be perfect

imperfections are what he loves and to see you hating on them makes him upset

so just know that you're getting a man who will show you A LOT of his love

he will be 100% loyal to you and to know that he has that in return makes him LITERALLY SO IN LOVE OMG

literally both of you are so in love fr

and if you wrote a song about him he would probably lose it tbh

like he cant believe that you love him that much, but he is so over the moon about it

he thinks it is super romantic that you are able to show your feelings that way to him and he's glad you have that outlet

so he 100% supports your music

he actually didnt think you were intimidating and that's why yall fit LMFAO

you two just liked each other right off the bat

you two definitely make fun of oikawa and his huge ass ego LMFAO

you two get through arguments and stuff very well

and very logically

it's wonderful and SUPER HEALTHY

like people around you are JEALOUS omg

sing to him or just play music around him

that's his comfort time for sure

he also loves how confident you are, it really makes him love and support you even more and means there's nothing that he has to do unless you really need it and he will latch onto you the moment you need help

he loves the way you dress and present yourself and wants you to help him dress just as cool lol

literally thinks your a stunning and wonderfully smart partner and wouldnt ask for anyone else <3

💌 HOW WOULD HE ASK YOU TO BE HIS VALENTINE??

simply, he would just ask you upfront. you would be doing some work and get an unexpected little kiss on the head from kuroo when he asks: "wanna be my valentine?"

💌 VALENTINE’S DAY DATE

"Are you open Valentine's day?" Kuroo asked you, looking at his own calendar, his computer open in front of him. You checked your schedule, the 14th completely free. "Yeah, why?" Kuroo smiled at you and walked over, placing a kiss onto your cheek. "Because you and I are going to Disneyland on the 14th." "Really?!" You exclaimed, feeling like a kid again. "Of course we are! I know how much you love it and you haven't been in a really long time, so why not? Plus, I've never been myself, so I think it would be a good time." "You've never been?" "Nope, not once." Kuroo walked back to his computer and ordered the tickets, getting excited. "Well, you're gonna love it. Man, it's been so long." You laid back on your bed and smiled at the ceiling. "Kuroo, you're the best." "Aw, you're too sweet, y/n." He ordered the tickets and walked over to you, pulling you into his arms. "I'm excited. Just the two of us and a really stupidly fun day." --- When you two ended up in Disneyland again, you couldn't help but feel overjoyed. It's like all the stresses of life disappeared, and here you were in the most magical place on earth. You showed Kuroo all of your favorite rides and ordered all of your favorite foods. Kuroo even ended up getting you something special from the gift shop. You showed him the best time that he's had in a long time and he did just the same for you. Hours passed and you couldn't stop all of the fun. Lots of small jokes from Kuroo and loving giggles from you. At dinner, the two of you were seated at one of the best places at the park to eat and a smile was stuck on your lips. "Thanks for taking me here, Kuroo." "No need to thank me. Thank you for having fun." A special Valentine's dessert came to the table and the two of you smiled. "Happy Valentine's Day." You said in unison. <3

~~~~~

mystery date rules | pinned post @tonberry-yoda

[rize-is-writing]

Hi could i get a Genshin impact romantic matchup?

I’m 20. She/her, preference for men

Ideal First date: My dream date is probably at an amusement park (Disneyland maybe) because it was the highlight of my childhood and allows me to not act like I have a stick up my ass all the time and have fun LMAO. I’d prefer it over just a dinner date or a movie because it’s more fun. I also just think amusement parks are romantic and in a sucker for cute fluffy cliche stuff. In general though I would enjoy any date that shows that he put thought and effort into it and actually values the time I’m spending with him. (Like instead of just saying “let’s hang out. What do you want to do”, be like “hey when are you available this week? Saturday? Ok be ready at 7 on Saturday”. I like that because it shows initiative and interest). Also if we are meeting each other somewhere don’t be late I will leave. So overall any date that’s fun, shows effort, interest, and shows that he actually took the time to think about my personality and what I’d like.

Personality: INTJ 3w4. I’m introverted and calm most of the time. I can be socially awkward but if I prepare myself or plan beforehand I can be very charming. I'm really analytical and am good at finding loopholes and working around problems under pressure. But I can also overthink a lot of things and plan out too much of my interactions with people. I'm not good with emotional support and can come across a little cold because of that but I usually try my best to understand the other person and their needs. I hate small talk and I like people who are blunt and logical but also have emotional intelligence. However, I cannot deal with overly emotional people who are extremely dramatic and make a big deal of their feelings when a situation can be logically resolved much more quickly and peacefully. I'm not that expressive (outwardly at least because I'm actually really emotional I just hide it well) and have a hard time relaxing or enjoying things because I've been conditioned to always consider how it will look on mine and my family's reputation. I'm a perfectionist and hold myself to very high standards and I can sometimes be very critical of others because of my high expectations. I constantly chase perfection for myself and try to be the most idealized version of myself but these standards cause me to be extremely hard on myself when it comes to falling short of my expectations or making mistakes. I’m very understanding, fair, and extremely loyal. I’d literally take a bullet for my friends but I also expect the same kind of loyalty in return. I’m very devoted to my principles and can often have a hard time forgiving people if they do something I find to be fundamentally wrong according to my principles. I have trust issues with romance but when I fall in love I fall really hard and I’m very romantic (im a songwriter so I’ll literally write lyrics about them and draw them and stuff). A lot of people don’t realize how deeply I feel things because I don’t show it on the surface. I’ve also been told I seem intimidating until someone gets to know me. Some of my dealbreakers are: misogyny (when people especially men undermine my intelligence and experience and end up making a mistake I warned them about only to listen when another man repeats the same thing l've been saying since the beginning), big egos with nothing to back it up, people who can't keep up with me (I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone whose hand I have to hold all the time. They need to be on the same level/wavelength as me and not drag me down), being a coward and not standing up for your own beliefs/motives, people that are way too nice (whoever I end up with has to have a mean streak because it shows they are able to take action when needed. How are they going to support and protect me if they can’t even stand up for themselves when needed.), being self absorbed and not considering the consequences of your actions, people who have a moral superiority complex that think they're better for not wanting to break rules to get what they want, and people who can't take responsibility for their actions. (I would respect someone whose honest about being a bad person a lot more than I respect someone who tries to come across as kind and caring all the time no matter what. It’s like that Jack sparrow quote, “I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly, it's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly stupid”. I fully agree with him. I also have a short temper when people act like the things I mentioned, or if I’m in a situation where people are being inefficient or wasting my time but if people communicate effectively I’ll be very patient and help them come up with a way to deal with their situation.

Hobbies/Likes: I love fashion and I've been a model since I was 14, I used to do pageants as a kid, I make my own music and music is probably the thing I love the most. It's really what I use to process the world so music is definitely the way to my heart. I can't play any instruments but I sing and make my own music. (Shameless self promo but here’s my newest song). I'm a good artist but I don't like doing it on a deadline I've gotten back into drawing recently tho. I've also been doing martial arts since I was 7 + fencing. I'm good at chess and poker and made money from playing/betting on games when I was younger. I also love reading.

Dislikes: Misogyny (when people especially men undermine my intelligence and experience and end up making a mistake I warned them about only to listen when another man repeats the same thing l've been saying since the beginning), big egos with nothing to back it up, people who can't keep up with me (I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone whose hand I have to hold all the time. They need to be on the same level/wavelength as me and not drag me down), being a coward and not standing up for your own beliefs/motives, people that are way too nice (whoever I end up with has to have a mean streak because it shows they are able to take action when needed), being self absorbed and not considering the consequences of your actions. People who have a moral superiority complex that think they're better than me for not wanting to break rules to get what they want. People who can't take responsibility for what they do (Everything I do is on purpose so even if it's a bad thing I'll admit to it because whatever happens as a result is no one's problem but my own). Although I will say there's sometimes an exception to these things depending on the person and situation.

--------------------------

(listened to your song by the way, really cool! It kinda gave me a bit of nostalgia, you are very good!)

I found your match! Come to meet them, c'mon c'mon!

While reading about your description, I couldn't help but think that you and Ayato could really be a power couple!

You and him have a lot in common personality wise, both of you can be charming, prefer someone blunt rather than to dance around the matter. Loyalty is also a quality that Ayato values the most in people, and maybe someone ready to risk how much as you do for those who he loves.

Something different about you two is maybe your ability to relax: for you is a bit difficult but for Ayato can be a bit easier (when he is not dying on a pile of paperwork and anything work related), with his little time on his hands, he has learned how valuable relaxing can be and so know how to help you. Mentioning the little time he has, appointments and a precise day to do everything is important to him given the tight schedule he has.

Ayato is a man of logic, rarely gives in emotions or so it seems: he knows how to wear his heart on his sleeve and is enough cool headed and rational to reflect and come to a right answer. He is observant and has learned to read the people around him, so I think he can easily sense the shift on your own emotions when you feel troubled despite not showing it: it takes a word, or simply an unusual action on your part, even the smallest, for him to understand. As a partner Ayato is a bit distant, at least in the pubblic eyes but I see him being more affectionate in private, for sure values the time he has with you like gems.

Would be for sure one to enjoy your music, probably even interested about it (and maybe give you some useless trivia or curiosities about it, but that's Ayato for you); for sure very endeared by your little bets on your younger days (but can you beat him on board games, he will tease). Also... Do you have any problems with sparring dates? Just asking, you know. For science. Ayato is a sword guy, and so some experience with new, more foreign, sword styles wouldn't hurt him. He is someone who values hard work, no matter who you are or your origins, and you strike me as someone who would for sure get his attention only for that.

Sometimes he can be a bit spoiled if we may say, being born as a rich prick, and his sadistic tendencies (save Thoma) can be a bit of a down back on this relationship, if we also consider him being slightly two-faced at the times, but he is one who sticks close with his ideals and is ready to risk something to chase them or to protect the one he loves. He for sure got your back there!

Hope that you enjoyed it and it reached your expectations! <3

[dashielldeveron]

OMG EARLY IM SO EXCITED. I HAVE TO CAST IN MY BETS ON WHO I THINK THE MYSTERY MAN IS BECAUSE IVE BEEN THEORIZING BUT IM LIKE SUPER BAD AT IT 😭😭😭 BUT LIKE I REALLY THINK THAT IT COULD BE KAMINARI 😭😭😭😭😭 I mean ok reasons being 1 - isn’t present mic, 2 - is kinda unlikable in prev routes (perv 💔), and as for new hints there are a couple of manga/anime shots focusing on him hands because quirk so maybe ?? nice fingers ??? Although I do doubt myself because even though I do love him I just don’t think he’s 60k words material, he is not that complex as a dude 💔💔 but if it is him (which it isn’t ) I’m totally ready to be absolutely SEATED to see wtf his deal is (in my head I was trying to brainstorm what a denki route would be and what I came up with is that its basically like a reverse bkg route where mc knows that he is their soulmate but absolutely cannot fucking STAND him, so they intentionally lead him down every wrong path so that he doesn’t find out 😭😭😭)

I’m trying to come up with other characters it could be and like I have 2 more srs options and like a couple crack ones. 1 is all might, I’m not sure if he’s even appeared but all might to me has a lot of presence in the anime that I just assume he’s a background character in fic even if he isn’t. Main reason why I think it could be him is because being that guys soulmate would definitely come with 60k words full of complications. Like he is an old ass man and the very public symbol of peace how do even find out that he’s ur soulmate…. But the more I think about it the more I think it’s probs not him because like why would we not like him that much??? I mean he’s old?? But that’s the only thing + I’m not even sure he even appears 😔😔😔.

Next guess is maybe midoriya, I love that man so much but I’m pretty sure he is WIFED 💔(I remember his appearance in the shinsou route (( to be fair seeing him be with another woman would make me kinda not like the scenes he’s in leading up to his route….thinking thoughts))) and his hands are also given incredible focus in the manga so points to sucklable fingers. Also his route would definitely have 60k words of complications because number 1 - the girlfriend and number 2 very public hero (number ONE) very busy he probably has no time to spend with his actual partner, let alone two + he’d never cheat to begin with. I’m probably reading too much into it because he’s most certainly paired up with someone else but I do love him ( trying to brainstorm a route idea for him like I did for denki and his would just be like thinking he’s ur soulmate but his ass is so busy that you can never spend enough time with him to know so mc resort sto getting into very weird very extravagant accidents so that they can spend more time together)

my more unserious guesses are like iida (has appeared but hasn’t done anything too unlikable to my knowledge) or sero (same as iida) or just by some miracle it’s shinsou again lolol. BUT THOSE ARE MY STAKES, ILL BE IMPRESSED IF EVEN ONE OF THEM IS REMOTELY CLOSE. I’m hyped for the sleepover event, fic comes out for me at like 7am so I’m setting my alarms!!!!! I can’t wait to see all the clothing choices and I’ll have like a million new scenes to draw!!!!!

have decided i'll post any speculation sent in......shan't respond. 👀

lololol are we on opposite sides of the world??? love that. love that this manga that is good but also bad has brought us together :) get some sleep!!! you'll have something to look forward to when you wake up!!!

[onedayatatime-please]

Thursday, Aug. 15th, 2024. 1:03 pm

I've spent the whole day with extreme anxiety. I did my breakfast sandwich, shower, and everything like I said I would, but in between has been spent doing breathing exercises to try and calm myself down as my heart has been racing. I have been sitting in front of my computer emotionally prepping for my therapy appointment only to get a call five minutes before its supposed to start telling me that its been cancelled because the therapist had some sort of emergency and is now no longer taking new clients. This is fine, shit happens. Im now just emotionally exhausted and a bit upset that I had to change the person I wanted to be my therapist, and the new person im going to do intake with seems good but not quite as good. Who knows, maybe im wrong and Im gonna end up loving them but Im so fucking tired.

Also I had a dream last night where I was back on Randy's farm and got to say hi to Bandito. He must be a very old horse now if he is still alive (I know his mother passed a few years ago), and in my dream his hairs were greying a bit, but he still had the white pattern around his eyes. There was a girl there working on the farm and we were flirting, and in the dream I was kinda hoping to get with her. Most of the dream was spent on the farm, but at some point it shifted to a desert scape and suddenly I was in a war zone and hiding out in some low mud buildings from a group of soldiers. As some point a soldier found me and the last thing I remember from my dream was crying and begging for my life as he pointed his gun in my face. Very weird to have those two things happen one after the other.

I woke up feeling like I had not slept at all, which has been pretty much how I've been waking up every day recently.

I'm gonna clean the house and get ready for my cousins to be here in 3 hours. I am also going to try and photograph some more drawings for my portfolio so I can work on uploading them when I am visiting with my grandparents.

I am not dead yet, I will do my best to keep it that way.

9:42 pm edit:

Dinner went well and now I am very tired. I had a call with 🪶. He’s going to another city on the same days I’ll be near him. I think it’s time I move on from him. I loved him so much, and it’s not his fault that his life is falling apart. I want to be there for him and I want to keep loving him because I love loving him but I know it’s not sustainable. A part of me feels like I should just go along for the ride, I’m twenty, it doesn’t need to be sustainable yet. But I don’t want a ride, not really. He does tho, he wants to do crazy shit and that would be fine if we could work together to sustain our relationship on top of that but that doesn’t seem likely. This has been coming for so long I don’t really feel sad about it yet, I just feel lonely. I haven’t felt like I’m actually in a relationship for a while. And he was the one who made me want a sustainable relationship in the first place. I was so set on being lonely, but then I met him and it made me realize that I really do want another person, I want to be married, I want kids. But he doesn’t want any of that yet and he probably doesn’t want it with me either way. I’m glad that we were able to love each other for the few years we did. I wish things could be simple, but they are not. I don’t want to break it off with him because I’m afraid of experiencing true loneliness again after knowing what it’s like to actually not be lonely. Either decision leads to me being fucking miserable for a certain amount of time and I keep doing this thing where I try to negotiate and find a middle ground where I can be kind of okay for a little bit but that’s not how all this shit is gonna work in the end. I love him and I know that he loves me but we are at a time in our lives where we cannot fulfill each others needs in a stable relationship and so instead we are probably going to part ways and never hear from each other again and the thought of that makes me fucking sick.

I feel like a coward for wanting to leave him when he is struggling even though he is actively pushing me away.

I Wanna be an Astronaut floating through space

And be tied to a ship by a cord and just be simple and quiet.

But instead I’m a dog.

I’m gonna go to the ocean soon, so I can float in the water.

I’m not dead yet, I will do my best to keep it that way.