#or making the Smart Decision and going somewhere else for much cheaper

[bookinit02]

is it really too much to ask to either a) have unlimited money forever or b) for everything to be free

[bl6ckr0s3]

Trip to Florida

During the week we had hotel rooms & flights booked, we were originally supposed to be going to Orlando, FL for the music video shoot during the first week of October. Hurricane Ian decides to come right through, so we had to push everything back 1 week because there were possible chances of power outages and such. Gail recommended that we reschedule everything for the following week for everybody's safety. It seemed like we flew there then came back 2 days later so fast. It was my first time traveling to Orlando, FL. We didn't see any alligators on the streets or anything because apparently that's a normal thing over there. We never had a chance to stick around long enough to check out Sea World or the Universal Studios over there which is what are known for in that area for the tourists.

Everything was so green. A lot of plants were fresh and had life. Not dying or decaying like here in California from the draught. The gas there was only $3.25 a gallon. Paying $17 for a combo from Burger King is just so astronomical. I truly think Los Angeles is just way too much overpriced to be living in. I can understand why even rich people would decide to move out of state because the cost of living here is too much. Thank the politicians for that. All the idiots that cast their votes has made it super hard to live here in the first place without even realizing it. I was born and raised here all my life, but after 3 places that got broken in in Los Angeles, my family were smart to stay the fuck away from the city. Moving to El Monte & Pomona was the best decisions they ever made.

I would've not minded moving to Vegas or Arizona like everybody else for a chance of lifestyle change since everything out there is also cheap. I have never been to the east coast too often so Nashville, TN would be interesting if me and Joshua decided to move over there. I have given it a lot of thought, and I truly love him very much. We want to spend the rest of our lives together and we been wanting to get married. Sometimes his emotions are a roller coaster. He will have his depressive moments where he doesn't want to live because he's not getting to the place he wants to go. Traveling to Nashville, he may have an opportunity with the music scene over there. The audience and crowd are more friendly and open over there vs over here people are very stuck up and not as caring. Things are definitely gonna be cheaper over there, and I'm sure it snows, too. I never lived in a place that snows, lead alone even driving through snow. I would be nervous about that from the videos that I watched and seeing all the line of cars sliding down the road and hitting everybody or everything without being able to stop.

If Joshua can't make it as a musician, he would be happy just doing security work around Graceland. I have faith that he can make it somewhere with his music. He's put so much work and effort into them. It's his passion. People can see what your passionate about clearly through how well your work comes out. If things don't get better within the next 6 months, we planned on moving out there for real. It breaks my heart that I would have to leave my son and family behind, but that's why I truly hope that our life will change for the better and hopefully if our dreams comes true, I can afford a good lawyer to come back and fight for my son.

[ratmonky]

Death Drive

Word Count: 5.5K

Warnings: non-con, mild blood, choking, biting, fight/violence, burns, tentacle

AO3 Link

A gift to my lovely friend who also drew this gorgeous piece for this fic,  @bacterialheaven​  <3 (Your art fascinates me so much ahh T^T)

Although most of the devil hunters have the life instinct, I think Hirofumi doesn't care much about survival while doing his work, making him the perfect example of an individual with a death drive. Just like Kishibe (:

The depths of the ocean had many things hidden at the bottom where sunlight never reached. Fish still yet to be discovered, monsters and devils.

Swimming in the ocean was something you could never do since the thought of never knowing what might be hiding underneath the dark waters was horrifying.

However, the terrifying creatures of the ocean could never get you as long as you stayed on the land.  

Right?

~~~

Hitchhiking wasn’t as dangerous as you had anticipated. When you told your close friends that you would be making your way out of the city by hitchhiking, they warned you about the dangers of getting in the car with someone who might want to hurt you. No matter how much you tried to explain to them how you had to lay low and stay away from any public transportations to not get caught, they didn’t listen.

However you hadn’t listened to them either, that was why you were sitting on your luggage near the roadside. You were only a couple of towns away from the city but you still had a long way to travel.

It had taken you more than a dozen rides to get to here from where you had started. Normally it would take two hours by car to travel here but it took you eight hours to get where you were now.

It was getting late, your last ride had promised to drop you off next to a place you could stay the night but the man was too creepy to look at and you felt uneasy to be stuck in the truck with him.

Naturally, you had insisted that he dropped you off on the first roadside diner.

You regretted it now. It was the middle of the night, you didn’t have any place to stay and the roadside diner you had been planning to eat was out of your budget.

Either you had to get a ride now to save money to travel to a cheaper roadside diner or go out of your budget and stay the night here feasting on food… The latter option was the worst. Saving money was more important.

You knew how to attract a ride anyway. Smile in a friendly way, hold up your ‘going to the countryside!’ sign, and hope for the best. You wouldn’t wait any longer than between ten to fifteen minutes before hitching a ride but it was almost impossible to get a ride at night.

There was no way that someone would drive you to the next town or somewhere you could sleep. Everyone was on the edge because of the devil attacks that had started happening more frequently.

No. Don’t think about devils. Not now. Not ever.

With a long sigh, you redirected the light from your flashlight onto the map. You could wait until the morning or start walking on the side of the road until you came across a gas station; however, it all felt like a waste of time and effort. This side of the city didn’t have anything but trees on the roadsides. It could be dangerous to walk close to the forest at night too, you had heard the devils who lived in nature would come out at night.

The sound of your stomach grumbling brought you out of your frantic thoughts.

You were starving, the last thing you ate was a granola bar in the morning. It had been quite a while since you had last eaten but if you went over your budget, you might not be able to make it to your destination.

“Where are you headed?”

Startled, you turned your head to the man who was talking to you. He looked around your age, he had black hair and a rather creepy smile tugging at his lips.

“Um, the countryside.”

“Oh, you’re all alone?” he asked.

You nodded to confirm. Then internally yelled at yourself for telling him that you were alone. He could be someone dangerous.

“I’m headed to the countryside too, want me to give you a ride?” He gestured towards a black car parked in front of the diner.

You would have taken his offer if it weren’t for the sinister smile on his face.

“Thank you but I wouldn’t want to be a burden.” You averted your gaze from him and shone the light back on the map.

“It’s dangerous to be out this late at night.” He put his hands in his pockets, shrugging slightly. “I wouldn’t be able to sleep knowing I didn’t take you to safety.” He gestured towards the parked car behind him once again. “I'll give you a ride, free of charge.”

He had cornered you, there was no reason for you to refuse his offer. You were still conflicted though, you would have turned him down if it wasn’t this late in the night. He didn’t look like the type of person to take no for an answer either. You couldn’t say no to his generous offer but you kept hesitating. If you were to find the perfect excuse maybe he would leave. However, you didn’t have any excuses.

Ugh!

Why were you even hesitating? You needed a ride and here was this guy, offering to take you away from the doomed city. You hit the jackpot!

“A-are you sure?”

“Come on, I was about to leave.”

“Ah, I can’t thank you enough.” Gathering the stuff you had with you and putting away the flashlight, you forced yourself to smile at him. “You saved me from waiting who knows how long for another ride.”

He didn’t say anything as he led the way towards his car. Opening the baggage, he let you put your luggage in the back and closed it. As you were walking around the car to open the door and sit on the back seat, the guy spoke before he hopped on the driver seat himself.

“I have stuff in the back, sit on the front.”

You stared inside through the window to see two large black bags on the backseats. Reluctantly, you reached to open the front door and climbed inside the car.

“So, where are you exactly headed?” He asked as he put on his seatbelt.

His question brought you out of your frantic thoughts. “Somewhere remote.”

“Hmm, so no specific destination? Don’t you have a family member who’s waiting for you? Where are you going to stay?”

You didn’t have anywhere to stay. At least not yet. Your plan was to find a motel and stay somewhere remote until people forgot about you.

Most importantly, it didn’t feel like he was asking these questions to start a conversation. You changed your mind, wanting to get out of the car.

You turned your head to tell him that but his unsettling stare left you speechless.

He asked a more particular question. “Do you have a specific address you want me to drop you off to?”

“I-in front of the first cheap motel we come across would be perfect.” You clutched on your small shoulder bag. You felt nervous when people stared at you for too long.

He hummed in acknowledgment as the car rolled forward.

“You seem to have a lot of luggage. Moving somewhere?” he spoke again, taking a turn and getting on the highway.

Your head jerked up, looking at him. “Um, uh.” You were hesitant to lie. “I’m just backpacking around the country.”

“Wouldn’t it be cheaper to bike instead of hitchhiking?” He wasn’t even facing you but you could tell he was smirking at your utter stupidity. “Or rather do it with a group?”

Although your throat felt dry, you didn’t dare to swallow. “Probably but I wanted to have a little adventure for myself, alone.”

“Don’t backpackers usually have a backpack and not a luggage?”

“I just have too many things I need with me.” Ahh, you were so bad at lying. Stop fidgeting with your fingers and looking around like that. He will notice. Just… change the subject. “A-anyway, I don’t think we introduced ourselves. I’m (name), what’s your name?”

“Hirofumi.” He grabbed the gear shift, changing it to a higher level and speeding up. You sank deeper into your seat and started to panic. Only then you realized you hadn’t put on your own seatbelt. While you were hurriedly trying to put it on, Hirofumi pressed on the cigarette lighter button. You hoped he wasn’t going to smoke inside the car but failed to notice how there weren't any cigarette tar stains on the interior of the car.

He took a sharp turn, you grunted but managed to put your seatbelt on. As you sat back in your seat, the first thing you noticed was that he was driving down towards a road leading towards the forest.

“Um, I think you took a wrong turn,” you said, bringing it up to his attention.

“It’s a shortcut.” He kept his eyes on the road that was only being illuminated by the headlights, everything else was dark, you had no idea what kind of shortcut he was taking.

There was this feeling of being in the middle of the ocean. You could feel something sinister was lingering in the deep dark water underneath you. Something was about to emerge and grab you by your ankle, pull you down, and drown you.

You knew how to swim.

However, could you swim if whatever thing was pulling you down turned out to be a lot stronger and scarier than anything you had ever faced?

Could you struggle when you were this weak?

Could you fight when you had nothing to fight with?

Without your weapons.

Without your badge.

Without your devil.

“You know, hitchhiking was a great idea,” he said, his fingers drumming on the steering wheel as he continued smiling. “It was a smart option but for someone as dumb as you, there was a way to ruin it. You went and told all of your dumb friends about your plan.”

You stared at him for some sort of explanation but you didn’t need any. Yet you still asked him, whimpering, “W-what are you talking about?” Your bottom lip had started trembling.

He knew.

“For a devil hunter, your sense of danger is too low.”

A tremendous wave of panic washed over you when he sped up.

“Who are you?” Did you even need to ask? He was one of those private hunters. Makima had most likely sent him after you.

Despite being a devil hunter from the city, you were now weak. You had resigned from your work without notice and broke the deal with your devil. Although it had been an impending decision rather than a sudden one, you had left your work abruptly.

After watching so many people die and losing who you had thought would be your friends for a long time, the bitter truth of being a devil hunter had resurfaced.

Devil hunters were destined to die on the job, sooner or later.

The money you earned from being a devil hunter could let you live in comfort materialistically until the day you died but having to suffer from nightmares every single time you put your head on the pillow or closed your eyes could never be comforting. It wasn’t worth it.

You didn’t want to lose more people or see any more grotesque devils murdering civilians but once you started working under Makima’s orders, leaving wasn’t that easy.

That’s why you were on the run.

Even though you had sworn to protect the people of your country, you were running away from the job that gave you a purpose to your insignificant life like a coward.

How childish.

The cigarette lighter popped off with a soft click sound, bringing you out of your hectic thoughts.

He was taking you back… He was going to hand you over to Makima. You were going to work until you died.

“You should’ve gone up north, going south was predictable. Well, at least if you hadn’t told your friends about the hitchhiking part, maybe you’d go under everyone’s radar. However you’re a chatty one, aren’t you? Some ‘friendship comes before work’ type of person, huh? That would explain a lot-”

Hirofumi’s words didn’t reach you anymore. The color drained from your face and your ears started ringing. Your whole body started to shake, and tears started streaming down your cheeks. “Please,” you sobbed, your voice came out shaky, pathetic. “Please don’t do this. I did nothing. I’m just tired of all of the deaths and I can’t handle it any-”

“You can’t talk your way out of this,” Hirofumi said as he took another sharp turn, driving deeper into the forest.

You found yourself stuttering, ”Y-you don’t understand.” You looked at Hirofumi with tears in your eyes. “I’ll be killed.”

“What are you so unhappy with?” Hirofumi spoke again but he wasn’t even facing you. “It’s not like you were living contentedly up until now, were you? In that case, it makes no difference where you live or what you do for a living. Or if you’re killed or not.”

Your face found a new shade of pale. He wouldn’t understand. He was one of those crazy devil hunters who had shut their humanity off.

“You only had to kill demons for a bit and you got rice every day. It might as well be heaven but I guess you weren’t a real hunter.” His smile grew wider as he was watching the trees creep towards him slowly before zooming past the window. “You can die in peace now.”

You got quiet but your tears didn’t stop.

With a vicious smile on his lips, Hirofumi turned away to face you. “You know, a pro devil hunter wouldn’t cry.”

Everything was spinning, it made you believe that your head felt fuzzy. It didn’t even occur to you that he was driving at a normal speed now. Almost immediately you tried to think of an escape plan. Could you manage to run away if you were taken to the headquarters? There was no way you could and that was why you had to fight with everything you had to refuse to go with him. You looked out of the window, the forest could be a great way to lose him. The trees and the darkness could cover you, giving you the advantage to sneak away without having to face this guy in a battle. What was your next move going to be?

You didn’t know but you had to get away.

You stared at the door lock, it was locked but you could lift it even without him noticing. The speed was still accelerating but if you managed to jump out of the car you would have a head start by running. The car wouldn’t stop until his shock wore off and that would give you the great advantage of looking for a place to hide.

There weren’t many people or devils out in the forest at this time of the night. Hopefully. It would be easy for you to run without being seen by another person who could tell him where you went.

What if a devil attacked-

Getting overwhelmed, you took a sharp breath and exhaled loudly. You had to calm down. You didn’t have much time to think over the plan, you just had to do it. If you waited for too long you were going to lose this chance of getting away.

Hesitantly, you glanced at Hirofumi. To your luck, he was only focused on driving.

Cone on. Come on. Come on.

Your heart was pounding, a single cold sweat droplet trickled down from the burning skin of your temple to your cheek as you carefully and suddenly unlocked the door. But you forgot about the most important thing. Your seatbelt. Your biggest mistake was forgetting to unbuckle your seatbelt. As you had twisted your body to jump out of the car, you had found yourself stuck, slammed back into your seat from the force of the seatbelt itself.

Hirofumi stared at you as if it wasn’t a big deal that you opened the door of the moving vehicle or how you were trying to escape. He lifted his right hand up while he crossed his middle and index fingers, “Octopus.”

Your blood ran cold as a giant tentacle emerged outside of the car from a dark cloud and slammed the door closed. You were frozen in your seat as if your muscles had dried up and turned to stone.

What was that?

No, you didn’t want to know.

The car decelerated until it slowly rolled to a stop.

You didn’t dare to look at Hirofumi but you knew he was smiling at you. You knew he had that sinister smile plastered on his face, glowering at you with his big dark eyes.

“Ink.”

He turned off the engine, the headlights flickered off and it became pitch black. Darker than black. It all swallowed you whole. It was as if light didn't exist, the only thing you could see was the dangerous glint in his eyes.

Hirofumi calmly plucked off the burning hot cigarette lighter and held his hand out towards you but you couldn't see. “Ms. Makima told me to bring you to the headquarters,” he said, pausing momentarily as you were trembling in fear, unable to move a muscle. “Dead or alive. I get paid either way.”

You gulped audibly. This was it, wasn’t it? The end.

There was another long pause before he sighed and pressed the cigarette lighter on your thigh. “Look me in the eye when I’m talking to you.”

The sharp pain made your eyes widen and your mouth popped open in pain. You could run away, you just had to unbuckle the seatbelt and bolt out of the car.

However, as soon as your hand went to the buckle to pop the latch plate out, he firmly pressed the metal lighter on the back of your hand.

Yowling in agony, you refused to retrieve your hand and instead unbuckled your seatbelt. Without giving him another chance to attack, you opened the door.

As soon as you fell on the mud, you took a couple of wobbly steps before finally gaining your strength and used the ground as a springboard to start running without looking back. Things weren't as dark now, you could see well but you still were confused about things. Without actually having a clear idea of your whereabouts you kept running deeper into the forest but you couldn’t run in a straight line, you had to confuse him with which way you were running. Abruptly, you stopped to look around to see where you could run. The sudden movements made you lose your balance, stumble and fall down. You scraped your knees. Without checking your injuries, you got up to make a sudden bolt to your right.

Your own heavy footsteps were echoing each time your foot made contact with the wet mud. Or... no. Those weren't echoes of your own footsteps they were more like- They belonged to someone else-

“You’re running too slow.” A scoff.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw him running next to you. He wasn’t out of breath like you were but he lifted his hand towards you, pointing his forefinger at your face before crossing his middle finger over the other digit.

He was going to call out his devil again.

With a sob, you made a move to change your direction but it was too late.

“Octopus.”

Black smoke appeared behind him. From the dark mist, a tentacle emerged, abruptly grabbing you by the waist, you flailed violently as soon as your body crashed onto the tentacle. It lifted you up, punching the air out of your lungs from the force of its grip around your body. You started hitting the tentacle’s slimy skin, crying and yelling at the same time. “Let me go, let go!”

Hirofumi pressed his hand on the tentacle and walked towards you while dragging his hand on it. “You’re more fun than I thought.”

As he was getting closer, you struggled within the tentacle’s hold by kicking helplessly at the air. “Get away from me!”

He stopped in front of you and looked up at you with that same disturbing smile before tapping on the tentacle twice. “I took a liking to you.” The tentacle lowered you down until Hirofumi tapped on it again to stop. “You’re quite interesting.”

The tentacle tightened its grip around you and forced your arms to be pressed against your chest. You were getting crushed, you kept trying to inhale but no air was going inside your lungs.

“However it still would be less of a hassle for me to take your corpse to Ms. Makima. You’re just too annoying.”

Fear came rushing back, the bitter reality of how insignificant your life was a harsh truth to accept. Hirofumi could kill you without batting an eye, he would be fine with taking your life because at the end of the day he was going to get paid for doing his job.

You opened your mouth to beg for his mercy but nothing would come out. Your face was turning blue from lack of air instead.

Hirofumi said something you couldn’t hear. Instantly the tentacle’s hold loosened around you. With the pressure gone,  you greedily inhaled air, filling up your lungs and coughing.

“I’ll make it quick,” he said, this time frowning instead of smiling. “What a shame though, I thought we’d be able to work together in the future.”

“W-wait!” you coughed, trying to catch your breath to talk to him. “No, no, no! Please, I’ll do anything. Please,  I won’t try to run again, I’ll sit patiently and- and-”

He was very quiet, almost silent, but resolute. The blood in your face drained away when you heard his cold and terrifying tone asking you a question with three simple words, “You’ll do anything?”

Your eyes widened as you tried to process the meaning behind his words, you could feel your blood being pumped through your veins but something was wrong, there was a heavy feeling of something crawling under your skin.

“I’ll do anything.”

That sinister smile returned to his face.

The tentacle lowered you, now, your feet could touch the solid ground.

“I want you to prove me wrong,” he said, stretching his arms above his head.

“Huh?” The tentacle unwrapped around you but remained at the back while you stared at the guy in front of you in confusion. “Prove what?”

He positioned himself in a fighting pose. “Prove that you’re a devil hunter worth keeping alive. Let’s duke it out.”

He had to be kidding. You were nothing without a weapon or your devil. It was unfair to you and-

Hirofumi landed a sudden kick on your stomach, doubling in pain, you took a couple of wobbly steps back.

When you glanced up at him, you saw him jumping in his place as if he was only warming up. He was taunting you, don’t fall for it.

Yet you knew he wasn’t kidding about you proving him that you were a good hunter. He had made it clear. So you had no choice but to take him down if you wanted to live.

You aimed a kick towards him but he caught you mid-air by your ankle. Whimpering, you tried pulling your leg back to no avail. The panic of the situation started to settle in as he got closer to you. “That’s cute, you didn’t even put any strength behind your kick.” He tucked your leg around his waist, closing the distance between the two of you. His face had gotten awfully close, his hot breath ghosted over your face. For the first time tonight, you looked at his eyes directly, his pupils were dilated to the point of being completely black. You could see your own terrified expression being reflected back to you in them. To put it simply, you were at his mercy once again, balanced only on a single leg with no way of escaping his hold.

“You lose,” he grinned. “You really aren’t cut out to be a devil hunter.”

“Please,” you began but he interrupted you, his other hand pressing on the small of your back and sliding down your curves to squeeze a generous amount of the supple flesh of your ass. Your breath hitched, the uneasy feeling of being powerless against a higher rank like him made your stomach churn in fear.

“Let’s have some fun before you die.” You could hear the smile in his voice.

With that, the tentacle returned, abruptly going under your shirt, pulling it up and over your head. You didn’t even get the time to react as Hirofumi let your leg down to shove you forward against the tentacle. Gasping, you planted your hands against the tentacle in a pathetic attempt to push yourself up but it was now impossible with his weight pressing you down. His hands were holding your hips in a death grip and rubbing your clothed ass onto his own clothed crotch. You were moving away from his hips helplessly, unaware of the tentacle pushing your bra up to let your tits bounce free. Only when the cool air hit your bare chest, you became aware of what the tentacle was doing. Your nipples perked up and the slimy skin caressing your skin made you flinch, the feeling of one of its suckers on your nipple was enough to make you shriek in disgust.

Hirofumi chuckled, his hands on your hips slid up, feeling your curves before dragging you against his clothed cock. He couldn’t help but grab your hair to pull it as he grinded against your ass with a little too much force. You could feel him growing bigger, he had to be a twisted creep to get off to this.

“Stop… no more…” Begging, you turned your head to look at him. With the way he was pressing you down, you couldn’t meet his gaze, instead found your cheek being pressed flat against the tentacle. Ignoring your pleads, Hirofumi pulled himself back to yank your pants down hurriedly as the tentacle latched one of the suckers on your nipple, toying with the sensitive nub. You started to breathe hard as the realization of how vulnerable you actually were hit you hard. All you could do was to pathetically attempt to get away from Hirofumi to be assaulted by the tentacle instead.

Then the loud sound of his belt buckling made you jolt, the tears and begging for him to stop came right after. You would do anything for him to stop. However your cries were ineffective, they didn’t stop him from pulling down your panties and drinking up the sight of your naked lower half. They only seemed to spur him on even more.

“Stop…” you whimpered and struggled. Tears started streaming down your face as a choked sob left your lips. He smiled against the skin on your shoulder in response while lining himself on your entrance. Twisting your arm behind your back to keep you still, he put his entire weight behind his hips to surge them forward and buried the entire length of his cock in your cunt.

Wincing, you gasped. Hirofumi took it as a signal to move. You were awfully wet, each time he pulled back himself to slam his hips forward, the squelching sounds of your pussy filled the silence of the forest. If that wasn't gross enough, your cheek was being grazed against the slimy skin of the tentacle, its fishy stench started to overwhelm you, making you gag.

“Ahh, you like this don’t you?” He tentatively pulled his hips back to abruptly slam them into your pussy.

“No…” You bit back a moan, closing your eyes and begging for all of it to stop internally.

“You’re getting off to this, you’re sopping wet.” Hirofumi mounted you completely, you could feel his entire weight settle on your back. “Be a good girl for me, will you? Be honest, it’s just the two of us here.”

You grumbled in response.

“Makima isn’t listening.” He nosed some hair out of his way to whisper in your ear. “Only I will hear your confessions. You can tell me anything, trust me.”

“Go to hell,” you hissed. If he was going to kill you, so be it! You weren’t going to give him the pleasure of humiliating you. All you had left was your pride and you were planning to keep it until the very end.

He slammed his hips forward, hitting your sweet spot on the first try. His firm thrust was all it took for you to silently scream, with the air in your lungs completely gone from the impact, you were clenching around his cock. You opened your mouth to take in some air but the tentacle wrapped around your neck, squeezing tightly around you to prevent you from breathing. The tip of the tentacle forced its way into your mouth and swirled around your tongue before diving deeper down into your throat. Hirofumi placed his hand on the tentacle, tapping twice for it to loosen around your neck. The tentacle left your mouth with a disgusting pop sound. Then he replaced the tentacle with his own hand, shoving his fingers into your mouth and grabbing you from the inside of your cheek.

Now, when he thrust forward and picked up his pace, you couldn’t bite back your moans. To your utter horror, it worked. Every thrust of his hips left you moaning, gasping for air. His merciless, rough thrusts remarkably sped up, especially in comparison to before. He was humping you like a rabid dog now and he responded to your surprised moan with a long, pleased hum.

Your drool started to spill out from your mouth and down to your chin since you didn’t have the luxury to swallow the saliva with three long digits prying your mouth open. You moaned audibly and threw your head back when his cock stroked a specific spot along your insides, Hirofumi took this opportunity to bite into your nape hard enough to draw blood, on a second note, you started to think he could be an actually rabid dog.

A scream left your lips, more out of pleasure than pain.

Hirofumi’s teeth sank deeper into your flesh as he felt your gummy walls pulsate around his cock, clenching and begging to be filled with his seed. He gave a muffled chuckle against your flesh, chewing on the raw skin. Although you weren’t honest in the slightest, your body was.

The tentacle’s tip went between your legs and the sucker latched onto your clit, catching you by surprise and making your entire body shake in pleasure.

How cute.

With a delighted smile, Hirofumi stopped biting your nape. He licked your blood off of your skin all the while he was fucking you frenziedly, thrusting in and out your pussy with sloppily wet sounds that started to make your knees unbuckle. Swallowing down your pride, you gave in to the pleasure so you could move your hips and arch your back to meet his frantic thrusts. At the same time, the tentacle toyed with the sensitive nub. It all made your legs trembled under you as your moans got louder than before.

Hirofumi's pace suddenly slackened when his cock throbbed upon your walls clamping on him. Taking his hand from your mouth, he placed it on your shoulder to grab you. He pulled his hips back and abruptly slammed forward, punching the air out of your lungs one last time as you felt the slight twitch of his balls on your skin before a pleasing warmth filled your belly.

The tentacle moved in tight circles around your clit and you clenched around Hirofumi’s cock for the last time, milking more of his seed using your pulsating walls inside of your cunt. Even after the tentacle left you alone, Hirofumi continued fucking his cum into your pussy, gross squelching sounds from his seed gushing out from your abused hole had become a white noise to you at this point. By the time he pulled out of you and let you go, your legs gave up from under you. Before you could crash on the dirty mud, the tentacle caught you, holding you up in a gentle grip.

Hirofumi was tucking himself into his pants while you watched him in exhaustion. He noticed your stare and gave you the same unsettling smile. “I think you’d be a great devil hunter if you were partnered up with me. Makima would agree if I said so. Won’t you agree too?”

You couldn’t keep your eyes open anymore but you managed to blink slowly in response, mouthing a ‘yes’ in defeat.

Hirofumi’s eerie smile grew wider, his eyes squinted from his cheeks puffing up. “I look forward to working with you in the future.”

The depths of the ocean had many things hidden at the bottom where sunlight never reached. Fish still yet to be discovered, monsters and devils.

Swimming in the ocean was something you could never do since the thought of never knowing what might be hiding underneath the dark waters was horrifying.

However, the terrifying creatures of the ocean could never get you as long as you stayed on the land.  

Right?

~~~

Hitchhiking wasn’t as dangerous as you had anticipated. When you told your close friends that you would be making your way out of the city by hitchhiking, they warned you about the dangers of getting in the car with someone who might want to hurt you. No matter how much you tried to explain to them how you had to lay low and stay away from any public transportations to not get caught, they didn’t listen.

However you hadn’t listened to them either, that was why you were sitting on your luggage near the roadside. You were only a couple of towns away from the city but you still had a long way to travel.

It had taken you more than a dozen rides to get to here from where you had started. Normally it would take two hours by car to travel here but it took you eight hours to get where you were now.

It was getting late, your last ride had promised to drop you off next to a place you could stay the night but the man was too creepy to look at and you felt uneasy to be stuck in the truck with him.

Naturally, you had insisted that he dropped you off on the first roadside diner.

You regretted it now. It was the middle of the night, you didn’t have any place to stay and the roadside diner you had been planning to eat was out of your budget.

Either you had to get a ride now to save money to travel to a cheaper roadside diner or go out of your budget and stay the night here feasting on food… The latter option was the worst. Saving money was more important.

You knew how to attract a ride anyway. Smile in a friendly way, hold up your ‘going to the countryside!’ sign, and hope for the best. You wouldn’t wait any longer than between ten to fifteen minutes before hitching a ride but it was almost impossible to get a ride at night.

There was no way that someone would drive you to the next town or somewhere you could sleep. Everyone was on the edge because of the devil attacks that had started happening more frequently.

No. Don’t think about devils. Not now. Not ever.

With a long sigh, you redirected the light from your flashlight onto the map. You could wait until the morning or start walking on the side of the road until you came across a gas station; however, it all felt like a waste of time and effort. This side of the city didn’t have anything but trees on the roadsides. It could be dangerous to walk close to the forest at night too, you had heard the devils who lived in nature would come out at night.

The sound of your stomach grumbling brought you out of your frantic thoughts.

You were starving, the last thing you ate was a granola bar in the morning. It had been quite a while since you had last eaten but if you went over your budget, you might not be able to make it to your destination.

“Where are you headed?”

Startled, you turned your head to the man who was talking to you. He looked around your age, he had black hair and a rather creepy smile tugging at his lips.

“Um, the countryside.”

“Oh, you’re all alone?” he asked.

You nodded to confirm. Then internally yelled at yourself for telling him that you were alone. He could be someone dangerous.

“I’m headed to the countryside too, want me to give you a ride?” He gestured towards a black car parked in front of the diner.

You would have taken his offer if it weren’t for the sinister smile on his face.

“Thank you but I wouldn’t want to be a burden.” You averted your gaze from him and shone the light back on the map.

“It’s dangerous to be out this late at night.” He put his hands in his pockets, shrugging slightly. “I wouldn’t be able to sleep knowing I didn’t take you to safety.” He gestured towards the parked car behind him once again. “I'll give you a ride, free of charge.”

He had cornered you, there was no reason for you to refuse his offer. You were still conflicted though, you would have turned him down if it wasn’t this late in the night. He didn’t look like the type of person to take no for an answer either. You couldn’t say no to his generous offer but you kept hesitating. If you were to find the perfect excuse maybe he would leave. However, you didn’t have any excuses.

Ugh!

Why were you even hesitating? You needed a ride and here was this guy, offering to take you away from the doomed city. You hit the jackpot!

“A-are you sure?”

“Come on, I was about to leave.”

“Ah, I can’t thank you enough.” Gathering the stuff you had with you and putting away the flashlight, you forced yourself to smile at him. “You saved me from waiting who knows how long for another ride.”

He didn’t say anything as he led the way towards his car. Opening the baggage, he let you put your luggage in the back and closed it. As you were walking around the car to open the door and sit on the back seat, the guy spoke before he hopped on the driver seat himself.

“I have stuff in the back, sit on the front.”

You stared inside through the window to see two large black bags on the backseats. Reluctantly, you reached to open the front door and climbed inside the car.

“So, where are you exactly headed?” He asked as he put on his seatbelt.

His question brought you out of your frantic thoughts. “Somewhere remote.”

“Hmm, so no specific destination? Don’t you have a family member who’s waiting for you? Where are you going to stay?”

You didn’t have anywhere to stay. At least not yet. Your plan was to find a motel and stay somewhere remote until people forgot about you.

Most importantly, it didn’t feel like he was asking these questions to start a conversation. You changed your mind, wanting to get out of the car.

You turned your head to tell him that but his unsettling stare left you speechless.

He asked a more particular question. “Do you have a specific address you want me to drop you off to?”

“I-in front of the first cheap motel we come across would be perfect.” You clutched on your small shoulder bag. You felt nervous when people stared at you for too long.

He hummed in acknowledgment as the car rolled forward.

“You seem to have a lot of luggage. Moving somewhere?” he spoke again, taking a turn and getting on the highway.

Your head jerked up, looking at him. “Um, uh.” You were hesitant to lie. “I’m just backpacking around the country.”

“Wouldn’t it be cheaper to bike instead of hitchhiking?” He wasn’t even facing you but you could tell he was smirking at your utter stupidity. “Or rather do it with a group?”

Although your throat felt dry, you didn’t dare to swallow. “Probably but I wanted to have a little adventure for myself, alone.”

“Don’t backpackers usually have a backpack and not a luggage?”

“I just have too many things I need with me.” Ahh, you were so bad at lying. Stop fidgeting with your fingers and looking around like that. He will notice. Just… change the subject. “A-anyway, I don’t think we introduced ourselves. I’m (name), what’s your name?”

“Hirofumi.” He grabbed the gear shift, changing it to a higher level and speeding up. You sank deeper into your seat and started to panic. Only then you realized you hadn’t put on your own seatbelt. While you were hurriedly trying to put it on, Hirofumi pressed on the cigarette lighter button. You hoped he wasn’t going to smoke inside the car but failed to notice how there weren't any cigarette tar stains on the interior of the car.

He took a sharp turn, you grunted but managed to put your seatbelt on. As you sat back in your seat, the first thing you noticed was that he was driving down towards a road leading towards the forest.

“Um, I think you took a wrong turn,” you said, bringing it up to his attention.

“It’s a shortcut.” He kept his eyes on the road that was only being illuminated by the headlights, everything else was dark, you had no idea what kind of shortcut he was taking.

There was this feeling of being in the middle of the ocean. You could feel something sinister was lingering in the deep dark water underneath you. Something was about to emerge and grab you by your ankle, pull you down, and drown you.

You knew how to swim.

However, could you swim if whatever thing was pulling you down turned out to be a lot stronger and scarier than anything you had ever faced?

Could you struggle when you were this weak?

Could you fight when you had nothing to fight with?

Without your weapons.

Without your badge.

Without your devil.

“You know, hitchhiking was a great idea,” he said, his fingers drumming on the steering wheel as he continued smiling. “It was a smart option but for someone as dumb as you, there was a way to ruin it. You went and told all of your dumb friends about your plan.”

You stared at him for some sort of explanation but you didn’t need any. Yet you still asked him, whimpering, “W-what are you talking about?” Your bottom lip had started trembling.

He knew.

“For a devil hunter, your sense of danger is too low.”

A tremendous wave of panic washed over you when he sped up.

“Who are you?” Did you even need to ask? He was one of those private hunters. Makima had most likely sent him after you.

Despite being a devil hunter from the city, you were now weak. You had resigned from your work without notice and broke the deal with your devil. Although it had been an impending decision rather than a sudden one, you had left your work abruptly.

After watching so many people die and losing who you had thought would be your friends for a long time, the bitter truth of being a devil hunter had resurfaced.

Devil hunters were destined to die on the job, sooner or later.

The money you earned from being a devil hunter could let you live in comfort materialistically until the day you died but having to suffer from nightmares every single time you put your head on the pillow or closed your eyes could never be comforting. It wasn’t worth it.

You didn’t want to lose more people or see any more grotesque devils murdering civilians but once you started working under Makima’s orders, leaving wasn’t that easy.

That’s why you were on the run.

Even though you had sworn to protect the people of your country, you were running away from the job that gave you a purpose to your insignificant life like a coward.

How childish.

The cigarette lighter popped off with a soft click sound, bringing you out of your hectic thoughts.

He was taking you back… He was going to hand you over to Makima. You were going to work until you died.

“You should’ve gone up north, going south was predictable. Well, at least if you hadn’t told your friends about the hitchhiking part, maybe you’d go under everyone’s radar. However you’re a chatty one, aren’t you? Some ‘friendship comes before work’ type of person, huh? That would explain a lot-”

Hirofumi’s words didn’t reach you anymore. The color drained from your face and your ears started ringing. Your whole body started to shake, and tears started streaming down your cheeks. “Please,” you sobbed, your voice came out shaky, pathetic. “Please don’t do this. I did nothing. I’m just tired of all of the deaths and I can’t handle it any-”

“You can’t talk your way out of this,” Hirofumi said as he took another sharp turn, driving deeper into the forest.

You found yourself stuttering, ”Y-you don’t understand.” You looked at Hirofumi with tears in your eyes. “I’ll be killed.”

“What are you so unhappy with?” Hirofumi spoke again but he wasn’t even facing you. “It’s not like you were living contentedly up until now, were you? In that case, it makes no difference where you live or what you do for a living. Or if you’re killed or not.”

Your face found a new shade of pale. He wouldn’t understand. He was one of those crazy devil hunters who had shut their humanity off.

“You only had to kill demons for a bit and you got rice every day. It might as well be heaven but I guess you weren’t a real hunter.” His smile grew wider as he was watching the trees creep towards him slowly before zooming past the window. “You can die in peace now.”

You got quiet but your tears didn’t stop.

With a vicious smile on his lips, Hirofumi turned away to face you. “You know, a pro devil hunter wouldn’t cry.”

Everything was spinning, it made you believe that your head felt fuzzy. It didn’t even occur to you that he was driving at a normal speed now. Almost immediately you tried to think of an escape plan. Could you manage to run away if you were taken to the headquarters? There was no way you could and that was why you had to fight with everything you had to refuse to go with him. You looked out of the window, the forest could be a great way to lose him. The trees and the darkness could cover you, giving you the advantage to sneak away without having to face this guy in a battle. What was your next move going to be?

You didn’t know but you had to get away.

You stared at the door lock, it was locked but you could lift it even without him noticing. The speed was still accelerating but if you managed to jump out of the car you would have a head start by running. The car wouldn’t stop until his shock wore off and that would give you the great advantage of looking for a place to hide.

There weren’t many people or devils out in the forest at this time of the night. Hopefully. It would be easy for you to run without being seen by another person who could tell him where you went.

What if a devil attacked-

Getting overwhelmed, you took a sharp breath and exhaled loudly. You had to calm down. You didn’t have much time to think over the plan, you just had to do it. If you waited for too long you were going to lose this chance of getting away.

Hesitantly, you glanced at Hirofumi. To your luck, he was only focused on driving.

Cone on. Come on. Come on.

Your heart was pounding, a single cold sweat droplet trickled down from the burning skin of your temple to your cheek as you carefully and suddenly unlocked the door. But you forgot about the most important thing. Your seatbelt. Your biggest mistake was forgetting to unbuckle your seatbelt. As you had twisted your body to jump out of the car, you had found yourself stuck, slammed back into your seat from the force of the seatbelt itself.

Hirofumi stared at you as if it wasn’t a big deal that you opened the door of the moving vehicle or how you were trying to escape. He lifted his right hand up while he crossed his middle and index fingers, “Octopus.”

Your blood ran cold as a giant tentacle emerged outside of the car from a dark cloud and slammed the door closed. You were frozen in your seat as if your muscles had dried up and turned to stone.

What was that?

No, you didn’t want to know.

The car decelerated until it slowly rolled to a stop.

You didn’t dare to look at Hirofumi but you knew he was smiling at you. You knew he had that sinister smile plastered on his face, glowering at you with his big dark eyes.

“Ink.”

He turned off the engine, the headlights flickered off and it became pitch black. Darker than black. It all swallowed you whole. It was as if light didn't exist, the only thing you could see was the dangerous glint in his eyes.

Hirofumi calmly plucked off the burning hot cigarette lighter and held his hand out towards you but you couldn't see. “Ms. Makima told me to bring you to the headquarters,” he said, pausing momentarily as you were trembling in fear, unable to move a muscle. “Dead or alive. I get paid either way.”

You gulped audibly. This was it, wasn’t it? The end.

There was another long pause before he sighed and pressed the cigarette lighter on your thigh. “Look me in the eye when I’m talking to you.”

The sharp pain made your eyes widen and your mouth popped open in pain. You could run away, you just had to unbuckle the seatbelt and bolt out of the car.

However, as soon as your hand went to the buckle to pop the latch plate out, he firmly pressed the metal lighter on the back of your hand.

Yowling in agony, you refused to retrieve your hand and instead unbuckled your seatbelt. Without giving him another chance to attack, you opened the door.

As soon as you fell on the mud, you took a couple of wobbly steps before finally gaining your strength and used the ground as a springboard to start running without looking back. Things weren't as dark now, you could see well but you still were confused about things. Without actually having a clear idea of your whereabouts you kept running deeper into the forest but you couldn’t run in a straight line, you had to confuse him with which way you were running. Abruptly, you stopped to look around to see where you could run. The sudden movements made you lose your balance, stumble and fall down. You scraped your knees. Without checking your injuries, you got up to make a sudden bolt to your right.

Your own heavy footsteps were echoing each time your foot made contact with the wet mud. Or... no. Those weren't echoes of your own footsteps they were more like- They belonged to someone else-

“You’re running too slow.” A scoff.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw him running next to you. He wasn’t out of breath like you were but he lifted his hand towards you, pointing his forefinger at your face before crossing his middle finger over the other digit.

He was going to call out his devil again.

With a sob, you made a move to change your direction but it was too late.

“Octopus.”

Black smoke appeared behind him. From the dark mist, a tentacle emerged, abruptly grabbing you by the waist, you flailed violently as soon as your body crashed onto the tentacle. It lifted you up, punching the air out of your lungs from the force of its grip around your body. You started hitting the tentacle’s slimy skin, crying and yelling at the same time. “Let me go, let go!”

Hirofumi pressed his hand on the tentacle and walked towards you while dragging his hand on it. “You’re more fun than I thought.”

As he was getting closer, you struggled within the tentacle’s hold by kicking helplessly at the air. “Get away from me!”

He stopped in front of you and looked up at you with that same disturbing smile before tapping on the tentacle twice. “I took a liking to you.” The tentacle lowered you down until Hirofumi tapped on it again to stop. “You’re quite interesting.”

The tentacle tightened its grip around you and forced your arms to be pressed against your chest. You were getting crushed, you kept trying to inhale but no air was going inside your lungs.

“However it still would be less of a hassle for me to take your corpse to Ms. Makima. You’re just too annoying.”

Fear came rushing back, the bitter reality of how insignificant your life was a harsh truth to accept. Hirofumi could kill you without batting an eye, he would be fine with taking your life because at the end of the day he was going to get paid for doing his job.

You opened your mouth to beg for his mercy but nothing would come out. Your face was turning blue from lack of air instead.

Hirofumi said something you couldn’t hear. Instantly the tentacle’s hold loosened around you. With the pressure gone,  you greedily inhaled air, filling up your lungs and coughing.

“I’ll make it quick,” he said, this time frowning instead of smiling. “What a shame though, I thought we’d be able to work together in the future.”

“W-wait!” you coughed, trying to catch your breath to talk to him. “No, no, no! Please, I’ll do anything. Please,  I won’t try to run again, I’ll sit patiently and- and-”

He was very quiet, almost silent, but resolute. The blood in your face drained away when you heard his cold and terrifying tone asking you a question with three simple words, “You’ll do anything?”

Your eyes widened as you tried to process the meaning behind his words, you could feel your blood being pumped through your veins but something was wrong, there was a heavy feeling of something crawling under your skin.

“I’ll do anything.”

That sinister smile returned to his face.

The tentacle lowered you, now, your feet could touch the solid ground.

“I want you to prove me wrong,” he said, stretching his arms above his head.

“Huh?” The tentacle unwrapped around you but remained at the back while you stared at the guy in front of you in confusion. “Prove what?”

He positioned himself in a fighting pose. “Prove that you’re a devil hunter worth keeping alive. Let’s duke it out.”

He had to be kidding. You were nothing without a weapon or your devil. It was unfair to you and-

Hirofumi landed a sudden kick on your stomach, doubling in pain, you took a couple of wobbly steps back.

When you glanced up at him, you saw him jumping in his place as if he was only warming up. He was taunting you, don’t fall for it.

Yet you knew he wasn’t kidding about you proving him that you were a good hunter. He had made it clear. So you had no choice but to take him down if you wanted to live.

You aimed a kick towards him but he caught you mid-air by your ankle. Whimpering, you tried pulling your leg back to no avail. The panic of the situation started to settle in as he got closer to you. “That’s cute, you didn’t even put any strength behind your kick.” He tucked your leg around his waist, closing the distance between the two of you. His face had gotten awfully close, his hot breath ghosted over your face. For the first time tonight, you looked at his eyes directly, his pupils were dilated to the point of being completely black. You could see your own terrified expression being reflected back to you in them. To put it simply, you were at his mercy once again, balanced only on a single leg with no way of escaping his hold.

“You lose,” he grinned. “You really aren’t cut out to be a devil hunter.”

“Please,” you began but he interrupted you, his other hand pressing on the small of your back and sliding down your curves to squeeze a generous amount of the supple flesh of your ass. Your breath hitched, the uneasy feeling of being powerless against a higher rank like him made your stomach churn in fear.

“Let’s have some fun before you die.” You could hear the smile in his voice.

With that, the tentacle returned, abruptly going under your shirt, pulling it up and over your head. You didn’t even get the time to react as Hirofumi let your leg down to shove you forward against the tentacle. Gasping, you planted your hands against the tentacle in a pathetic attempt to push yourself up but it was now impossible with his weight pressing you down. His hands were holding your hips in a death grip and rubbing your clothed ass onto his own clothed crotch. You were moving away from his hips helplessly, unaware of the tentacle pushing your bra up to let your tits bounce free. Only when the cool air hit your bare chest, you became aware of what the tentacle was doing. Your nipples perked up and the slimy skin caressing your skin made you flinch, the feeling of one of its suckers on your nipple was enough to make you shriek in disgust.

Hirofumi chuckled, his hands on your hips slid up, feeling your curves before dragging you against his clothed cock. He couldn’t help but grab your hair to pull it as he grinded against your ass with a little too much force. You could feel him growing bigger, he had to be a twisted creep to get off to this.

“Stop… no more…” Begging, you turned your head to look at him. With the way he was pressing you down, you couldn’t meet his gaze, instead found your cheek being pressed flat against the tentacle. Ignoring your pleads, Hirofumi pulled himself back to yank your pants down hurriedly as the tentacle latched one of the suckers on your nipple, toying with the sensitive nub. You started to breathe hard as the realization of how vulnerable you actually were hit you hard. All you could do was to pathetically attempt to get away from Hirofumi to be assaulted by the tentacle instead.

Then the loud sound of his belt buckling made you jolt, the tears and begging for him to stop came right after. You would do anything for him to stop. However your cries were ineffective, they didn’t stop him from pulling down your panties and drinking up the sight of your naked lower half. They only seemed to spur him on even more.

“Stop…” you whimpered and struggled. Tears started streaming down your face as a choked sob left your lips. He smiled against the skin on your shoulder in response while lining himself on your entrance. Twisting your arm behind your back to keep you still, he put his entire weight behind his hips to surge them forward and buried the entire length of his cock in your cunt.

Wincing, you gasped. Hirofumi took it as a signal to move. You were awfully wet, each time he pulled back himself to slam his hips forward, the squelching sounds of your pussy filled the silence of the forest. If that wasn't gross enough, your cheek was being grazed against the slimy skin of the tentacle, its fishy stench started to overwhelm you, making you gag.

“Ahh, you like this don’t you?” He tentatively pulled his hips back to abruptly slam them into your pussy.

“No…” You bit back a moan, closing your eyes and begging for all of it to stop internally.

“You’re getting off to this, you’re sopping wet.” Hirofumi mounted you completely, you could feel his entire weight settle on your back. “Be a good girl for me, will you? Be honest, it’s just the two of us here.”

You grumbled in response.

“Makima isn’t listening.” He nosed some hair out of his way to whisper in your ear. “Only I will hear your confessions. You can tell me anything, trust me.”

“Go to hell,” you hissed. If he was going to kill you, so be it! You weren’t going to give him the pleasure of humiliating you. All you had left was your pride and you were planning to keep it until the very end.

He slammed his hips forward, hitting your sweet spot on the first try. His firm thrust was all it took for you to silently scream, with the air in your lungs completely gone from the impact, you were clenching around his cock. You opened your mouth to take in some air but the tentacle wrapped around your neck, squeezing tightly around you to prevent you from breathing. The tip of the tentacle forced its way into your mouth and swirled around your tongue before diving deeper down into your throat. Hirofumi placed his hand on the tentacle, tapping twice for it to loosen around your neck. The tentacle left your mouth with a disgusting pop sound. Then he replaced the tentacle with his own hand, shoving his fingers into your mouth and grabbing you from the inside of your cheek.

Now, when he thrust forward and picked up his pace, you couldn’t bite back your moans. To your utter horror, it worked. Every thrust of his hips left you moaning, gasping for air. His merciless, rough thrusts remarkably sped up, especially in comparison to before. He was humping you like a rabid dog now and he responded to your surprised moan with a long, pleased hum.

Your drool started to spill out from your mouth and down to your chin since you didn’t have the luxury to swallow the saliva with three long digits prying your mouth open. You moaned audibly and threw your head back when his cock stroked a specific spot along your insides, Hirofumi took this opportunity to bite into your nape hard enough to draw blood, on a second note, you started to think he could be an actually rabid dog.

A scream left your lips, more out of pleasure than pain.

Hirofumi’s teeth sank deeper into your flesh as he felt your gummy walls pulsate around his cock, clenching and begging to be filled with his seed. He gave a muffled chuckle against your flesh, chewing on the raw skin. Although you weren’t honest in the slightest, your body was.

The tentacle’s tip went between your legs and the sucker latched onto your clit, catching you by surprise and making your entire body shake in pleasure.

How cute.

With a delighted smile, Hirofumi stopped biting your nape. He licked your blood off of your skin all the while he was fucking you frenziedly, thrusting in and out your pussy with sloppily wet sounds that started to make your knees unbuckle. Swallowing down your pride, you gave in to the pleasure so you could move your hips and arch your back to meet his frantic thrusts. At the same time, the tentacle toyed with the sensitive nub. It all made your legs trembled under you as your moans got louder than before.

Hirofumi's pace suddenly slackened when his cock throbbed upon your walls clamping on him. Taking his hand from your mouth, he placed it on your shoulder to grab you. He pulled his hips back and abruptly slammed forward, punching the air out of your lungs one last time as you felt the slight twitch of his balls on your skin before a pleasing warmth filled your belly.

The tentacle moved in tight circles around your clit and you clenched around Hirofumi’s cock for the last time, milking more of his seed using your pulsating walls inside of your cunt. Even after the tentacle left you alone, Hirofumi continued fucking his cum into your pussy, gross squelching sounds from his seed gushing out from your abused hole had become a white noise to you at this point. By the time he pulled out of you and let you go, your legs gave up from under you. Before you could crash on the dirty mud, the tentacle caught you, holding you up in a gentle grip.

Hirofumi was tucking himself into his pants while you watched him in exhaustion. He noticed your stare and gave you the same unsettling smile. “I think you’d be a great devil hunter if you were partnered up with me. Makima would agree if I said so. Won’t you agree too?”

You couldn’t keep your eyes open anymore but you managed to blink slowly in response, mouthing a ‘yes’ in defeat.

Hirofumi’s eerie smile grew wider, his eyes squinted from his cheeks puffing up. “I look forward to working with you in the future.”

[choices-and-voices]

hi sorry if this has already been asked somewhere but im was wondering if you had any tips on how to get the best experience without having to pay ?

Hi there! Don’t worry, this question hasn’t been asked before, and I am honestly super flattered that you value my opinion enough to ask it ☺️ I’m not sure how helpful my tips will be because I don’t exactly consider myself an expert in this, but here are some things that came to mind! I’ve gone into quite a bit of detail, but if you want a quicker overview, just stick to the bold headings. Also, if any of the people reading this have good tips of their own, please lmk! I’m always learning new things about how to do this too 💕

1. This one’s a bit obvious, but still – take the opportunities that the game gives you to earn free diamonds. That means watching the bonus ads every day (5 diamonds/day), playing through chapters as often as you can (including replaying old books if there are no new releases – 2 diamonds/chapter), and watching ads at the end of book chapters for an extra diamond. Obviously, all this is a bit of a balancing act – you want to be playing Choices often enough to build up your diamonds, but not so often that it takes over your life and makes you feel frustrated, because what’s the point of it if it’s not fun anymore, y’know? So I’ve always been careful not to overdo it. Even if all you do is watch the bonus ads every day, that’s 35 diamonds/week – basically, one big diamond scene a week – which is honestly not too shabby.

2. At any one time, only play 1-2 books that you’re really invested in, and try to supplement that with another 2-3 books that you’re not really invested in or are replaying just for diamonds. As tempting as it can be to rush through every good-looking book in the app all at once, that just leads to a situation where a) you’re trying to divide your free keys between waaay too many releases, and b) there are so many demands on you for diamonds, you never get to consistently spend them on anything. So I personally think it’s best to only read a couple of good books at once, and instead of marathoning them, break them up with chapters from less-good books – this builds up your diamond stash for spending on the good books. Which leads into my next point:

3. Don’t zip through books too fast – even if most of the chapters are already released, spreading them out helps you earn more diamonds for them in the meantime. I’m really lucky to have been playing Choices for so long that almost all the books were presented to me in weekly release format – if I downloaded the app for the first time today, and saw all the fully-released books on there, I feel like I would be way too overwhelmed to play. So I reckon that, even if a book isn’t technically a weekly release for you, make it a weekly release! You might decide to play all the books you’re really invested in on a particular day when you have more free time – say, a Sunday. Then, you have Monday-Saturday every week to earn diamonds for those books, and something to look forward to at the end of it all. As for what you do with those diamonds:

4. Be smart about what you spend diamonds on. There are a couple of different components to this tip – it involves things like a) figuring out which types of purchases are worth diamonds in general, b) figuring out which types of purchases you want to prioritise in certain books, and c) planning ahead before you start playing a book chapter about where you might want to spend diamonds. To address each of those things one-by-one:

a) Figure out which types of purchases are worth diamonds in general. Off the top of my head, there are 6 main types of diamond purchases in Choices: ‘friendly’ scenes with LIs (12-25 diamonds), ‘steamy’ scenes with LIs (25-30 diamonds), scenes with your whole friendship group, collectible items (e.g. the tapestry pieces in Bloodbound, the clues in Veil of Secrets, etc.), outfits, and pets. Your mileage may vary a lot on which of these are most important to you, so take my opinions with a grain of salt. But my general advice would be to i) prioritise group scenes above LI scenes, ii) prioritise ‘friendly’ LI scenes above ‘steamy’ LI scenes, iii) avoid collectibles, and iv) go for outfits and pets only if you really like the look of them. This advice is based on the fact that, firstly, I think you get a better experience of immersion in a book if you know a bit about all the characters around MC, rather than just about one LI; secondly, ‘friendly’ LI scenes tend to tell you more about the LI than ‘steamy’ scenes, which are often 80-90% copied-and-pasted erotica despite being more expensive; thirdly, collectibles are a massive drain on diamond stores, and almost always unlock quite short, generic scenes that it’s easy to find on Tumblr or YouTube; and fourthly, both outfits and pets don’t do much except appear in the story at key moments, which can be a really nice touch but is still only needed in moderation. Of course, there are exceptions to these rules, and you might find that those exceptions are sometimes book-specific. Which leads me to Part B of this point:

b) Figure out which types of purchases you want to prioritise in certain books. It’s all well and good for me to say that group scenes are usually better than LI scenes, but when I’m playing a book with an amazing LI but a pretty meh supporting cast (*cough cough* Myra Dixon carries Baby Bump on her shoulders *cough cough*), I obviously may need to adjust my spending habits slightly. Moreover, by focusing all your diamond spending on just one main thing per book – like Myra’s romance in Baby Bump, or the party’s side-quests in Blades of Light and Shadow, or the posse in Queen B – I think you end up with a much better playing experience, because you feel like you’re seeing at least one facet of the story in-depth instead of getting a patchy surface view of lots of different facets. For the most part, the purchases you prioritise in a book can mostly depend on personal taste, but there are a few books where some background knowledge might be helpful in the decision. Four things that I think are worth flagging are that i) the ‘competition books’ (America’s Most Eligible, Queen B, Hot Couture) do require regular outfit purchases to win, although winning isn’t that much better an experience than being runner-up; ii) Veil of Secrets and Nightbound are two books where it’s worth saving 30-35 diamonds for the final chapter, because your MC is forced to leave the small-town setting if you don’t; iii) Across the Void is a book that frequently invites you to spend diamonds to save characters’ lives, but their death arcs are honestly much better-written and more sensible than their survival arcs; and iv) the It Lives series is the only one where characters can die due to an accumulation of choices you make throughout the story, so maybe it’s worth keeping some diamonds in reserve for that one. Which just leaves us with one more sub-point:

c) Plan ahead before you start playing a book chapter about where you might want to spend diamonds. I want to take this opportunity to thank whichever people in the fandom maintain the Choices wiki, because oh my gosh, they are lifesavers. For the last year or so, my response whenever a new Choices chapter is released has been to wait a few hours, Google ‘[book name] choices’, open the wiki result, and skim through to check how many diamond choices are available & how much they cost. Because all the wiki includes are the possible responses to every choice presented – it doesn’t even state the wording of the choice itself – this is a relatively spoiler-free technique that helps a lot with big picture planning. For example, you might decide not to buy an early group scene because there’s a nicer-sounding LI scene later on, and come to think of it, you should replay a few more chapters of another book first to save up the diamonds for that scene. If you don’t mind encountering just a few more spoilers before you play the chapter, you can also scout out its diamond scenes in more detail by searching the relevant book or character tags on Tumblr, or by looking for a chapter stream on YouTube. You may decide that you don’t need to buy a diamond scene if you’ve already seen it played through by someone else, or alternatively, you may decide whether or not to buy a diamond scene based on how good it looks in an existing playthrough – in either case, these techniques can help you thoughtfully ration out the diamonds you have, instead of being caught off-guard whenever a diamond choice comes up.

5. On the subject of the Choices wiki, it’s also a great way to maximise your success in books without using diamonds. Whenever there’s a ‘right’ option to a choice that gives you a better outcome later in the chapter, that’s indicated in the wiki. So with a bit of pre-reading of the wiki before you play the chapter, and/or with the wiki open on a separate screen as you play, you can get the best outcome without having to buy that outfit or bonus scene that promised you ‘an advantage.’ Obviously, your mileage may vary on whether this method is actually worth it, or whether it takes all the fun out of Choices by ‘cheating’ at the gaming aspect. I personally view Choices as more of an interactive story app than a game I’m trying to beat, so I have no issue with this method, but opinions may differ and that’s okay.

6. If you’re really feeling like a lack of diamonds is limiting your playing experience, it may be best to start out with ‘cheaper’ books until you have more diamonds stored up. In this case, I’m using ‘cheaper’ to mean books where there are fewer diamond scenes, where diamond scenes are less expensive, and/or where diamond scenes don’t play as big a role in the plot. It can be hard to identify which books fit this bill, but as a general rule, it’s more likely to be the earlier-released ones or less-popular ones. Some which I’d recommend are the first few books of the Freshman series, the #LoveHacks series, the High School Story series, the Perfect Match series, Most Wanted, The Heist: Monaco, Wishful Thinking, Bachelorette Party, and The Royal Masquerade.

7. Finally, a really quick tip for making the most out of free keys – keys are used up as soon as you start a book chapter, and refresh ~every 3 hours. This means that, even if you don’t have time to play chapters every 3 hours, you should try to open the app roughly that often and just click to unlock a chapter. When you finally have time to play, you’ll have a whole lot of chapters ready to go plus another two refreshed keys, and you can power through them at whatever speed you need to fit in them into your break time or to earn diamonds for an upcoming release. Once again, this is a tip that may need to be practised in moderation, because you don’t want to be constantly interrupting your life to load up an app on your phone. But even if you just log in and unlock chapters every 6 hours, or every 12 hours, that’s still 2-4 extra chapters ready for you at the end of the day plus your two free keys.

I think that’s about all for my tips! Thanks for reading, and I hope it helped at least a bit ❤️

[kalgalen]

Jon makes Martin tea? ☕

It feels like a fair repayment, if anything. Jon knows he doesn't have the same knack for preparing tea as Martin does - has noticed it times and times again during Martin's absence, when the tea he made himself came out either as bitter as longing or as bland as loneliness - but he's giving it his full attention, and this has to count for something.

He's selected some apple-flavored dark tea. It's loose-leaf, none of that cheaper bagged stuff; he's bought it specifically for this occasion, though back then, Martin coming to talk to Jon of his own volition seemed like an absurd hope. Jon has even checked how long it has to brew for, and he is keeping an eye on the clock, staying close to the mug instead of getting distracted by - anything that doesn't directly involve Martin's comfort, honestly.

It does give him the occasion to reflect on what, exactly, he's going to say to Martin when he comes back with that cup of tea. Should he go with something smart? Martin might think he's mocking him. Something heartfelt might come out as patronizing, and he can hardly simply hands the cup to Martin and leave without a word. God, why is it so complicated?

Jon catches himself frowning intently at one unremarkable floor tile, and forces himself to uncross his arms. This is - ridiculous. What is he even nervous about? Martin's made clear he wasn't going to change his mind about picking the Eye over the Isolation; even Jon making a mess of their first casual conversation in a long time probably wouldn't be enough to make Martin regret his decision.

But no - the source of the tension lies somewhere else. It feels - more personal. It takes Jon a good minute to realize the anxiety currently twisting his stomach is one he hasn't felt since middle-school and that one rare, short-lived crush he had on - well, that's not important. What's important is that what he's feeling right now is fear of rejection. What if he says something wrong and Martin finally realizes Jon's just not worth his attention? What if all he wants from Jon now is a purely professional relationship? Not that Jon's got any idea of the kind of relationship he'd like to have with Martin now. Is he even still his boss? Does hierarchy even matters anymore? Jon just wants to be... allowed to worry about him. It seems like a weird way of putting it, but Jon can't think of a better one to express how much he wants to be able to be here for Martin the way Martin's been here for him in the past. And - he cares about the others, he truly does; but they somewhat fade in the background noise that is Jon's concern for Martin.

Jon is so caught up in his own thought he barely comes back to himself in time to remove the infuser from Martin's mug. He adds a spoonful of sugar to it, hums a mindless tune to himself as he stirs it; he stops when he realizes what he's doing - and comes to the realization that he's happy, for the first time in perhaps years.

It makes him feel dizzy, for a second; then he chuckles disbelievingly as he connects the dots, and he's never felt so sure of anything in ages: they're going to be fine, because Jon is ready to give as much as Martin's been giving him, at last.

He takes the cup,  and confidently leaves the breakroom.

[writingonjorvik]

Can We Discuss Why Reducing the Price Will Help the Game?

Don’t get me wrong. I get there is a business to funding SSO. The whole thing must cost millions to produce, in euros and in USD. I don’t want anyone to take a pay cut to get SSO out. And it’s not like I stand to gain any discounts from saying this, I got Lifetime for $50 when it was still the annual membership price. However, with the current pricing scale, the dev team isn’t really keeping up with their competition. That’s bad for the game overall, and if the devs can’t turn a profit in a year then there’s no game. As such, let’s discuss.

I will acknowledge a few things. One, the dev team keeps the lights on and they are expanding the company. I am not one to say that the game is failing. But it’s also not making a profit. It is increasing its size enough to expand, but it’s also keeping its gains about equal to its losses. That’s not bad, that’s most indie companies, so this is a plus overall. Two, SSO’s membership does reward members with Star Coins each week which is, complicated. Because while that is a service that may take away from sales over all on their micro-transaction front, there’s also no production cost on a Star Coin. There’s no work lost on that service as it’s an entirely computer generated good, no employee involved. But it is an overall plus for the company.

That said, some of SSO’s prices are way out of line when compared to their competition. To start, let’s look at a few other popular MMOs. Here is a list of some of the most popular MMOs and their membership prices. SSO’s monthly payments are about average, if not a little lower, with most MMOs at $8.50, but the issue with monthly payments is convincing people to keep paying. Buy-to-play and one time purchases are much more appealing model to most players because it’s the most financially responsible decision, and most MMOs with membership options have much larger free to play sections with membership just having some added benefits for show and level gain. So with SSO’s limited demo area where it’s much harder to get a sense of the game compared to the wider demo sections or completely full free versions of some MMOs, SSO might be a little harder to sink $8.50 monthly, and definitely is a hard sell for $75. Why spend that on a relatively indie game when you could sink your money on a more established MMO with about the same deals?

Now, that’s not an entirely fair comparison. SSO has a niche market it’s playing to. That’s fair. SSO is one of the few fully open world horse centric MMOs out there. Again, credit where credit is do. But again, let’s have a price comparison to some other popular horse MMOs and online games. Alicia Online, free with micro transactions to be added. Little trickier to get because of the wonky install, but free. Riding Out, in beta, but it’s only $20 and on Steam. Riding Club Championships, free. Horse Isle, both of them, free. Ostwind, $15. Any number of browser based games like Howrse, White Oak, Pony Isle, so on, all free with micro transactions. And this is all before we start getting into just horse games, to which there are numerous for cheaper one time purchases, the highest being about $30 based on age and active bidding. SSO and its franchise are about the only exceptions to this, with the old CD-ROMs being about $40 a piece on average.

No part of this is saying that SSO isn’t worth the price. To me, it always has been. But I fit the market and have the funds to afford it. I am a minority in that statistic. What I’m saying, with SSO’s competition in and out of this niche, they don’t hold a candle. Why pay SSO for what you can get basically get for free somewhere else? Sure you lose 3D graphics and some of the open world nature, but for free? Most people would settle those loses and chose the free option. In fact, most people do. Howrse is still way more popular than SSO. In particular, most parents would settle. And I know this from experience. No only can I personally not get any of my friends to try SSO because of the price, but I can see first hand these prices being more than most parents can afford. 

I work at the Boys & Girls Club of America. For those of you who don’t know, it’s an organization that provides opportunities for kids in families that aren’t doing great financially. It’s kinda like a cross between a daycare-like service and Scouts. And at my club, I’m the nerdy teacher. I know about video games. A lot of girls at my club play SSO, or played. When they found out I play too, the first thing they asked was how many horses I had. How many regions of the map I had unlocked. It was 60-ish at the time, and all. They nearly lost it when I told them I had all, at the time, six of the color changing horses and Spirit. Absolutely thrilled. But when I asked them how many they had and how far they had gotten, most of them said they had their starter and could only play for free. And that they couldn’t play anymore. Their parents couldn’t afford membership and so they gave up on the game.

Look I get pulling this statistic is kinda a low move, but I think it’s fair. Mostly because it’s not just kids at Club, and also because the families who come to Club buy other video games, cheaper video games. Kids I used to babysit had their parents say the same thing, and those families were well off. So for families of all income brackets, SSO’s prices are too high to consider when there are cheaper options. SSO has potential customers who would love to play their game, but their prices, in particular the most financially reasonable price of Lifetime, makes the game unobtainable for new fans. It gates the game off to the super fans who have the means to afford the game, and thus SSO develops its own echo chamber financially. SSO is funded by its whales. Its numbers are largely stagnant, and it’s not going to expand. The average family simply can’t afford it.

I’m not suggesting SSO wildly changes its prices. No, not at all. Mostly I’m just suggesting that the purchase of lifetime drops to $30-$50 USD, the average price of an indie game. It’s more expensive than most horse games, but it’s lower than most modern games and MMOs. It’s a nice balance between niche competition without selling SSO’s devs short. They are making a quality game, and they deserve to make money. But the devs need to be reasonable with where that price point is for most families with young kids. Further, SSO needs to have standardized payments for Star Coins. The fact that the prices are different on the Friends app compared to on the website is confusing and weird.

To compensate for lower prices, the dev team could instead offer more low priced digital goods. For one, there are dozens of hard core fans and old fans of those games who would buy digital downloads of the old CD-ROM games, since according to everything we know, SSO owns all the rights to those and they should be able to rerelease them. Not to mention that generates money for the devs instead of only online auctions holding those funds. Also, a $10 game or a $30 bundle of four is an awesome deal. It would certainly make SSO more interesting to have access to all of previous entries, and finally add a unique option to their gift store.

More seriously though, the dev team needs to change the prices on Star Coins. The prices are abusively high. I’ve said several times, but SSO’s current prices abuse people with whale tendencies, people who psychologically and biologically have the need to spend that kind of money on prestige items. I said this before with my silver fox comments, and perhaps I should have clarified it better. SSO does not have a pay to win or gambling situation, but the mentalities that come in to play when talking about whales is very, very similar to how casinos abuse people with gambling addictions. There was a Game Theory about this recently, or if you want a less nerdy source, look at Adam Ruins Everything’s episode on vacations and his comments on slot machines. Or, here’s Extra Credits on whales and this exact topic. 

To clarify the difference though, imagine a loot box system with 30 prizes in it. You can buy individual tickets for $10 and randomly get a prize, or just buy all 30 for $270. Someone with a gambling addiction would individually go through buying one or two at a time until they got the prize they wanted. Someone with whale tendencies would buy the whole pack. But both come from hormonal imbalances that give these people higher endorphin releases for doing so, and both end up spending unhealthy amounts of money in the end. SSO generates situations of the latter.

It was very easy for a lot of people on the silver fox controversy to say, “Well, I have self control, so others must too.” And I don’t want to keep dragging this up to beat a dead horse, but that’s extremely simple minded. Just saying “Adults with control over their finances make smart choices with their money, always,” but even with people who don’t have gambling addictions or whale tendencies struggle with this. You’re telling me that you’ve absolutely never splurged with your money? One tiny feel good purchase? Never ever, on anything at all? You really can’t, particularly if you bought anything from SSO. That’s not a need purchase, even if you were in your budget when you bought it. Now, your one feel good purchase could be 1 to every 100 purchases you actually need in your life. Good, that’s normal, and there’s nothing wrong with buying feel good purchases every now and then. But people with gambling addicts and with whale tendencies have a much harder time saying no to those impulses. SSO, with limited events and $30 horses, can make it a lot harder for someone who’s mind is biologically feeding them hormones to “have everything” to turn that voice off. So they sink the money, and with the prices so high, sooner or later that gets people into financial trouble trying to get everything. And SSO doesn’t encourage people to be responsible with their spending, unlike most gambling businesses who are legally required. Most video games aren’t, and that’s not SSO spearheading that problem. But that doesn’t mean they should be a part of it.

Another argument is that Star Coins are given out once a week, and that buying 100 Star Coins is just advancing a week in allowance. So why is that advance worth more than half of the membership to get it? Think about it, it’s $8.50 USD for one month of membership, again, a really fair price. But 100 Star Coins, an extra week so to speak, is $5.50 USD. How does that add up? Supposing that at minimum half of $8.50 USD is for the game itself, $4.25 USD, then the other $4.25 USD is for 400 Star Coins over that month. The next increment up for 500 Star Coins is $17. How is that a fair deal? Even supposing we give an expediting fee for skipping a week, 100 Star Coins still shouldn’t be worth more than $2. Not to mention that micro transactions work because of low prices. Why would SSO just ignore years of empirical data showing that the lower the price, the more likely people are to buy more of digital currencies? Also, how many of you would buy more Star Coins if a horse was $8-$10 USD instead of $30 USD? And more often? More for your money, and suddenly more Star Coins doesn’t sound so bad too a lot of you. And without being whales, I think a lot of you would be more eager to help support SSO financially, with a little more freedom to be able to give that kind of money.

SSO deserves to make money as a business, but the prices they currently have make the game inaccessible to most and dangerous to many. Cutting the seriously high prices for Lifetime and Star Coins would not only makes it easier for new players to join, but it would also protect people who biologically can’t really help that they tend to be whales. I know the short term of this would be a dip, but if the dev backed it up with merchandise that gamers actually wanted, like posters and games and books, or even shirts with actual SSO related content, and not all generic horse shirts, they’d probably be able to minimize those costs fairly well. Like, who would buy those sweaters from Jarlheim with the Soul Riders’ horses? Or a shirt that had a big SSO logo? Things that actually relate to the game. You could probably buy a “horse heart” shirt a dozen other places. And without going into that other topic, SSO could easily compensate loses from lowered prices by introducing merchandise that people would buy, and then have player’s friends ask what game was that shirt for. 

End of the day, I’m not a business person. I don’t know for sure if this would work. But when compared to dozens of games on the market today, maybe the other guys have some pretty good ideas too. And maybe it would help SSO to take some notes so they can start turning a profit in more years.

[poop4u]

Cat vs best and worst robot vacuum cleaners 

http://bit.ly/2UksOrS

If you’ve flirted with the idea of buying a robot vacuum you may also have stepped back from the brink in unfolding horror at the alphabetic soup of branded discs popping into view. Consumer choice sounds like a great idea until you’ve tried to get a handle on the handle-less vacuum space.

Amazon offers an A to Z linklist of “top brands” that’s only a handful of letters short of a full alphabetic set. The horror.

What awaits the unseasoned robot vacuum buyer as they resign themselves to hours of online research to try to inform — or, well, form — a purchase decision is a seeming endless permutation of robot vac reviews and round-ups.

Unfortunately there are just so many brands in play that all these reviews tend to act as fuel, feeding a growing black hole of indecision that sucks away at your precious spare time, demanding you spend more and more of it reading about robots that suck (when you could, let’s be frank, be getting on with the vacuuming task yourself) — only to come up for air each time even less convinced that buying a robot dirtbag is at all a good idea.

Reader, I know, because I fell into this hole. And it was hellish. So in the spirit of trying to prevent anyone else falling prey to convenience-based indecision I am — apologies in advance — adding to the pile of existing literature about robot vacuums with a short comparative account that (hopefully) helps cut through some of the chaff to the dirt-pulling chase.

Here’s the bottom line: Budget robot vacuums that lack navigational smarts are simply not worth your money, or indeed your time.

Yes, that’s despite the fact they are still actually expensive vacuum cleaners.

Basically these models entail overpaying for a vacuum cleaner that’s so poor you’ll still have to do most of the job yourself (i.e. with a non-robotic vacuum cleaner).

It’s the very worst kind of badly applied robotics.

Abandon hope of getting anything worth your money at the bottom end of the heap. I know this because, alas, I tried — opting, finally and foolishly (but, in my defence, at a point of near desperation after sifting so much virtual chaff the whole enterprise seemed to have gained lottery odds of success and I frankly just wanted my spare time back), for a model sold by a well-known local retailer.

It was a budget option but I assumed — or, well, hoped — the retailer had done its homework and picked a better-than-average choice. Or at least something that, y’know, could suck dust.

The brand in question (Rowenta) sat alongside the better known (and a bit more expensive) iRobot on the shop shelf. Surely that must count for something? I imagined wildly. Reader, that logic is a trap.

I can’t comment on the comparative performance of iRobot’s bots, which I have not personally tested, but I do not hesitate to compare a €180 (~$200) Rowenta-branded robot vacuum to a very expensive cat toy.

This robot vacuum was spectacularly successful at entertaining the cat — presumably on account of its dumb disposition, bouncing stupidly off of furniture owing to a total lack of navigational smarts. (Headbutting is a pretty big clue to how stupid a robot it is, as it’s never a stand-in for intelligence even when encountered in human form.)

Even more tantalizingly, from the cat’s point of view, the bot featured two white and whisker-like side brushes that protrude and spin at paw-tempting distance. In short: Pure robotic catnip.

The cat did not stop attacking the bot’s whiskers the whole time it was in operation. That certainly added to the obstacles getting in its way. But the more existential problem was it wasn’t sucking very much at all.

At the end of its first concluded ‘clean’, after it somehow managed to lurch its way back to first bump and finally hump its charging hub, I extracted the bin and had to laugh at the modest sized furball within. I’ve found larger clumps of dust gathering themselves in corners. So: Full marks for cat-based entertainment but as a vacuum cleaner it was horrible.

At this point I did what every sensible customer does when confronted with an abject lemon: Returned it for a full refund. And that, reader, might have been that for me and the cat and robot vacs. Who can be bothered to waste so much money and time for what appeared laughably incremental convenience? Even with a steady supply of cat fur to contend with.

But as luck would have it a Roborock representative emailed to ask if I would like to review their latest top-of-the-range model — which, at €549, does clock in at the opposite end of the price scale; ~3x the pitiful Rowenta. So of course I jumped at the chance to give the category a second spin — to see if a smarter device could impress me and not just tickle the cat’s fancy.

Clearly the price difference here, at the top vs the bottom of the range, is substantial. And yet, if you bought a car that was 3x times cheaper than a Ferrari you’d still expect not just that the wheels stay on but that it can actually get you somewhere, in good time and do so without making you horribly car sick.

Turns out buyers of robot vacuums need to tread far more carefully.

Here comes the bookending top-line conclusion: Robot vacuums are amazing. A modern convenience marvel. But — and it’s a big one — only if you’re willing to shell out serious cash to get a device that actually does the job intended.

Roborock S6: It’s a beast at gobbling your furry friend’s dander

Comparing the Roborock S6 and the Rowenta Smart Force Essential Aqua RR6971WH (to give it its full and equally terrible name) is like comparing a high-end electric car with a wind-up kid’s toy.

Where the latter product was so penny-pinching the company hadn’t even paid to include in the box a user manual that contained actual words — opting, we must assume, to save on translation costs by producing a comic packed with inscrutable graphics and bizarro don’t do diagrams which only served to cement the fast-cooling buyer’s conviction they’d been sold a total lemon — the Roborock’s box contains a well written paper manual that contains words and clearly labeled diagrams. What a luxury!

At the same time there’s not really that much you need to grok to get your head around operating the Roborock. After a first pass to familiarize yourself with its various functions it’s delightfully easy to use. It will even produce periodic vocal updates — such as telling you it’s done cleaning and is going back to base. (Presumably in case you start to worry it’s gone astray under the bed. Or that quiet industry is a front for brewing robotic rebellion against indentured human servitude.)

One button starts a full clean — and this does mean full thanks to on-board laser navigation that allows the bot to map the rooms in real-time. This means you get methodical passes, minimal headbutting and only occasional spots missed. (Another button will do a spot clean if the S6 does miss something or there’s a fresh spill that needs tidying — you just lift the bot to where you want it and hit the appropriate spot.)

There is an app too, if you want to access extra features like being able to tell it to go clean a specific room, schedule cleans or set no-go zones. But, equally delightfully, there’s no absolute need to hook the bot to your wi-fi just to get it to do its primary job. All core features work without the faff of having to connect it to the Internet — nor indeed the worry of who might get access to your room-mapping data. From a privacy point of view this wi-fi-less app-free operation is a major plus.

In a small apartment with hard flooring the only necessary prep is a quick check to clear stuff like charging cables and stray socks off the floor. You can of course park dining chairs on the table to offer the bot a cleaner sweep. Though I found the navigation pretty adept at circling chair legs. Sadly the unit is a little too tall to make it under the sofa.

The S6 includes an integrated mopping function, which works incredibly well on lino-style hard flooring (but won’t be any use if you only have carpets). To mop you fill the water tank attachment; velcro-fix a dampened mop cloth to the bottom; and slide-clip the whole unit under the bot’s rear. Then you hit the go button and it’ll vacuum and mop in the same pass.

In my small apartment the S6 had no trouble doing a full floor clean in under an hour, without needing to return to base to recharge in the middle. (Roborock says the S6 will drive for up to three hours on a single charge.)

It also did not seem to get confused by relatively dark flooring in my apartment — which some reviews had suggested can cause headaches for robot vacuums by confusing their cliff sensors.

After that first clean I popped the lid to check on the contents of the S6’s transparent lint bin — finding an impressive quantity of dusty fuzz neatly wadded therein. This was really just robot vacuum porn, though; the gleaming floors spoke for themselves on the quality of the clean.

The level of dust gobbled by the S6 vs the Rowenta underlines the quality difference between the bottom and top end of the robot vacuum category.

So where the latter’s plastic carapace immediately became a magnet for all the room dust it had kicked up but spectacularly failed to suck, the S6’s gleaming white shell has stayed remarkably lint-free, acquiring only a minimal smattering of cat hairs over several days of operation — while the floors it’s worked have been left visibly dust- and fur-free. (At least until the cat got to work dirtying them again.)

Higher suction power, better brushes and a higher quality integrated filter appear to make all the difference. The S6 also does a much better cleaning job a lot more quietly. Roborock claims it’s 50% quieter than the prior model (the S5) and touts it as its quietest robot vacuum yet.

It’s not super silent but is quiet enough when cleaning hard floors not to cause a major disturbance if you’re working or watching something in the same room. Though the novelty can certainly be distracting.

Even the look of the S6 exudes robotic smarts — with its raised laser-housing bump resembling a glowing orange cylonic eye-slot.

Although I was surprised, at first glance, by the single, rather feeble looking side brush vs the firm pair the Rowenta had fixed to its undercarriage. But again the S6’s tool is smartly applied — stepping up and down speed depending on what the bot’s tackling. I found it could miss the odd bit of lint or debris such as cat litter but when it did these specs stood out as the exception on an otherwise clean floor.

It’s also true that the cat did stick its paw in again to try attacking the S6’s single spinning brush. But these attacks were fewer and a lot less fervent than vs the Rowenta, as if the bot’s more deliberate navigation commanded greater respect and/or a more considered ambush. So it appears that even to a feline eye the premium S6 looks a lot less like a dumb toy.

Cat plots another ambush while the S6 works the floor

On a practical front, the S6’s lint bin has a capacity of 480ml. Roborock suggests cleaning it out weekly (assuming you’re using the bot every week), as well as washing the integrated dust filter (it supplies a spare in the box so you can switch one out to clean it and have enough time for it to fully dry before rotating it back into use).

If you use the mopping function the supplied reusable mop cloths do need washing afterwards too (Roborock also includes a few disposable alternatives in the box but that seems a pretty wasteful option when it’s easy enough to stick a reusable cloth in with a load of laundry or give it a quick wash yourself). So if you’re chasing a fully automated, robot-powered, end-to-cleaning-chores dream be warned there’s still a little human elbow grease required to keep everything running smoothly.

Still, there’s no doubt a top-of-the-range robot vacuum like the S6 will save you time cleaning.

If you can justify the not inconsiderable cost involved in buying this extra time by shelling out for a premium robot vacuum that’s smart enough to clean effectively all that’s left to figure out is how to spend your time windfall wisely — resisting the temptation to just put your feet up and watch the clever little robot at work.

via TechCrunch

https://poop4u/blog May 11, 2019 at 09:10PM DMT.NEWS, @Natasha Lomas, @pooop4u

[awed-frog]

If Ketch's new orders are to eliminate the Americans hunters, then she's going to have to kill Mary, and they have a thing even if they say they don't have a thing, Ketch it's, actually, the one who looked like he knew about the thing but was too insecure or oblivious about it to tell her anything. It'd be... i DONT know, if that's the case I hope Mary kills him before

I’m not really sure I understand what you mean there, but yes, I do agree that Ketch and Mary are having very different reactions to their (unforeseen) night of fun. I think that episode revealed a lot about who Ketch is and what he wants, but, since this is Buckleming, I’m not sure it was intentional, and how seriously should we take it. For instance, we now know with some certainty that Ketch is colour-blind, in a sense - that when we’ve seen him being rude to women, it wasn’t about them being women, per se - Ketch seems to operate in a world where the only people worthy of respect are those who do his job, and do it well. And, even more unusual, he doesn’t seem to mind if someone - even an outsider like Mary - is better than him. When she corrects him in front of Mick, who, after all, is supposed to be his boss, telling him they’ve killed eight shape-shifters, and not seven, Ketch is not annoyed in the least. Instead, he’s admirative. Considering he’s an alpha male who kills and tortures people for a living, this tells us a great deal about how his mind works.

(Mary’s attitude in that scene tells us a lot about her as well - here she is, the failed daughter, the failed wife and the failed mother, doing the only thing she knows how to do and doing it whit a proud smile on her face. I’d say there is a parallel with Dean in there somewhere, Daddy’s blunt instrument and all that, but I’m not sure it’d be appropriate - after all, we know Dean wants out, in some way; that he doesn’t want to be that person, never has. Mary, on the other hand - despite her insistence in pointing out she can ‘have it all’ is not, in fact, having it all. Whatever she says, she’s deliberately chosen hunting and killing over her sons, and she’s having a whale of a time. This is not a moral judgement: I’m simply trying to understand the character.)

Like - when Ketch was talking to Dean, he never showed his hand at all, in a way. But when Mary told him she once left hunting behind because she wanted a normal life, David does an excellent job to convey what would be pity on someone else’s face and is, instead, a kind of half empathy on Ketch’s. I have this feeling that while he was trying to make Dean his (if not sexually, than professionally, even if the subtext supported both readings), here Ketch is acknowledging he himself belongs to Mary. In that whole scene, he behaves like a subordinate - flattering without being unctuous, polite without being distant. And when he says out right that he understands and respects her unusual and ‘unwomanly’ choices (“Mrs Winchester, I believe you’re drawn to danger.”) - I believe that’s when something inside Mary woke up and decided that, after all, why not? They’re adults, and they’ve got a room, and look at this gorgeous man. In a way, he is to Mary what Crowley was to Dean - a bad influence, sure, but also genuinely attached to her within the limits of his capability to feel anything, and also non judgemental in any way and completely hers.

(In fact, I can see Drowley beginning in very much the same way during that ‘summer of love’ Dean and Crowley shared: I have no problem whatsoever in seeing this exact scene play out - Crowley offering Dean a drink in this same amused, friendly, slightly subservient way, and Dean suddenly ignoring the glass and catching Crowley’s tie in his hand instead; and pulling.)

The thing with men, though, is that - and it could be cultural, or biological - I really don’t know - very often they assume sex will change things. Since sex enpowers them but sullies you, you sometimes meet this power shifting attitude - as the old movies told us in greatest detail, women have control over men as long as they don’t sleep with them; but once the deed is done, the thing is reversed, because, as I said, sex makes men stronger and women weaker.

(Exposed to the dangers of gossip and pregnancy, that is; cheaper and dirty now their virginity is gone.)

As idiotic as this concept is, it somehow persists and lasts, and I think you could see it unfolding in this last episode as well: how Ketch’s careful politeness changes to a sort of cockiness - look at him, sitting up against the headboard, completely naked, his legs open, his penis (still this ever-important sign of masculinity and power and all things sacred) in full display. Contrast him with Mary, already dressing, as if hiding her own nudity, and slowly putting her wedding ring back on like some sinful adulteress. But next, and, okay, for once they wrote an interesting thing, the relationship between them is reversed. Ketch tries to be dominant and mark some kind of point, and Mary shoots him down every time. Having sex was her decision, not his; she’s now deciding it doesn’t mean anything, and he doesn’t have any say in that; and when Ketch confesses, with some regret, that he’s okay with it because he’s not ‘built’ for that and he’s not, in fact, capable to care for other people, just like her, Mary’s almost needlessly petty in pointing out that, again, he’s wrong, because she can, and she did - with someone else, that is, and certainly not him. At that point - and, again, I like how David played this, because he tried to cover himself at first, closing his arms across his chest, but then he sort of - manned up, so to say, and got all alpha again, choosing to remain there stark naked despite Mary’s word and even playing a card he knew would upset her: “I notice you took my advice. You had a choice to make - your work or family ties…”. Ketch doesn’t finish his sentence, but he doesn’t have to. Mary may be a strong woman, and also an unusual one, but she knows her relationship with her sons is far from perfect, and also that she’s a big part of the reason why. Hearing Ketch pointing it out - yeah, that must have smarted a bit - and, again, instead of being a ‘good’ woman and take the criticism, Mary lashes out and defends herself. And this is when Ketch finally takes a step back, because this is the kind of people he’s been trained (or trained himself) to respect: a bigger alpha.

So, really, I don’t know how to read this whole thing. I think it’s a big character shift for Ketch and almost invalidates the idea he’s a psychopath, but, then again, psychopaths are hard to write, so there’s that as well. I still don’t know what to make of Mary, and if I like her as a person (I do like her as a character, though - good choices all around). And, finally, I can’t help but feel that, if you took their relationship and that entire dialogue and gender-bended it, well, here you go - Buckleming did manage to insert their usual bit of dubcon, and yay, because look at it - Mary’s clearly superior to Ketch in most ways (professionally and, very clearly, emotionally), so if this was Mark Winchester seducing wide-eyed, damaged and vulnerable assassin Ms Ketch, who calls him Mr Winchester and hopes sex will lead to something more even if, sadly, she’s not sure she can ever love anyone - yep. They never disappoint, do they?

[glenmenlow]

Managing Product Portfolios

Would you like to own a billion-dollar business? The answer depends on who you are and what else you’re doing with your time and money.

For most companies, a profitable, billion-dollar business would be a dream. For IBM in 2012, a company with $104 billion in revenue, their billion-dollar-a-year Point of Sale (POS) business was a distraction at best. It was a slow-growing, highly mature market. Profits were acceptable but flat. They sold the division to Toshiba so they could focus on their core business lines of hardware, software, and IT services.

There was absolutely nothing wrong with the IBM POS business. Practically every major retailer in the United States ran IBM cash registers. It was, in fact, a legacy of the company’s very first products in the early 1900s. By 2012, though, the company had changed. Their market had changed. Their strategy had changed. It was time for POS to go. The divestment provides a good example of the challenges of marketing portfolios.

Managing Product Portfolios

The management of portfolios of offerings has been the subject of considerable work by academic researchers, practicing managers and management consultants. For example, the Boston Consulting Group (BCG) has suggested the use of the two-dimensional matrix above for classifying product offerings based on the growth rate and market share.

In the BCG matrix, products are plotted based on the rate of growth of the market and their market share. Most often a high rate of market growth is defined as 10% annual growth and high relative market share is defined as twice the share of the nearest competitor, but different organizations often employ different definitions.

The underlying premise of the BCG approach is that different products, with different market characteristics, should be managed differently. Thus, a “cash cow” is a product with a high relative market share in a mature market that generates more cash than is needed for reinvestment back into its support. Therefore, such cows throw off cash that the firm can use for other purposes. Although the good people in Redmond might disagree with this assessment, Microsoft Office is a great example of a cash cow. The product line throws off somewhere along the lines of $12 billion a year. This cash flow is not going to slow down any time soon. The product doesn’t cost much to support. It has almost no competitors.

In contrast, a “star” has a high relative market share in a growing market. The need to support growth means the firm must reinvest the cash generated by the star in order to sustain its market share, and, hopefully, as the market matures the star will become a cash cow.

Smart phones provide an interesting case example of a product that is transitioning from star to cash cow. The iPhone is still a star, for sure, but the market is maturing and the innovation cycle is slowing down. There’s a perceptible decline in excitement about new iPhone models. Most people who want one already have one. It’s gone from a land rush market to a replacement market. Cash cow status is around the corner. Thus, Apple is looking for its next star. The Apple Watch was a candidate, but it may not become a star for a variety of market-based reasons, for example, not everyone wants an iPhone on their wrists.

“Dogs” have a small market share in a market that is not growing. Such products are typically not profitable and often are net consumers of resources. For this reason, dogs are candidates for divestiture. In the BCG view, the IBM POS business was a “dog.” It was not going to be a star, at least not at IBM. Another company might turn the cash register business into some cutting-edge mobile app wallet business, for instance, but that was not going to happen at IBM. POS needed to be divested.

Finally, there are “question mark” products, products in growing markets that have a small market share. The key question to ask of question marks is whether they can be turned into stars by increasing market share. If they cannot be transformed into stars they too should be divested.

Weaknesses In The BCG Model

The BCG matrix is based on the premise that market share drives margins and cash flow. Thus, it is important to invest in acquiring market share in growing markets so that as a market matures, and growth slows, the firm will have a product that generates more cash than is needed to support the product. It is simple and easy to understand. On the other hand, it is often criticized for being too simple. In addition, it is not always clear how a market and how market share should be defined. For example, is Coca-Cola in the soft drink business or the beverage business? The assumed relationship between market share and profitability is not always present.

Competitive pressures can neutralize margins as a market expands. The history of the hard disk drive industry presents a terrifying example. In the 1990s and 2000s, hard drive manufacturers put each other out of business making smaller, faster, and cheaper hard drives. Margins were flat. Capital investments were high. The market was exploding but few companies made any money.

Lastly, many products fit into a mid-range that is neither high nor low with respect to market growth rate and relative market share and therefore do not easily fit within the product definitions identified by four cells of the matrix.

Contributed to Branding Strategy Insider by: David Stewart, President’s Professor of Marketing and Business Law, Loyola Marymount University, Author, Financial Dimensions Of Marketing Decisions.

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[gracebolton]

Energy Networks Conference

This is a conference for Energy Networks Australia, whose members make up the industry responsible for building and maintaining the poles, wires, pipes, substations, and other media for distribution of electricity and gas services.

“Oh you mean those guys who send me the damn bills every month?!!”

Well, no. That is your retailer and its important to understand the difference. The AER (Australian Energy Regulator) website describes the distribution networks clearly:

Electricity and natural gas distributors own and maintain the distribution networks, including electricity powerlines and power poles, and natural gas pipelines that carry electricity and natural gas to houses and businesses.

Your retailer is the company with the relationship to you. The Distributor – usually referred to as the Network – is the company building and maintaining the hardware.

My electricity retailer is Diamond Energy. I have an agreement with them whereby I pay for electricity usage in my house, including an agreed price per kWh and daily connection, as well as my feed in tariff (FiT) for exporting solar power. If I have any questions over my billing or service, I go to Diamond.

Diamond Energy sell their product to me via a network owned and maintained by Endeavour Energy (the Network or Distributor), who are responsible to ensure the network is up and running. If there is an outage, Diamond talk to Endeavour about resolution, and feed information to me.

The Network is focused on a working system, and the Retailer is focused on a happy customer. Classic, two-layered B2B (Business To Business) situation, operating in parallel with a B2C (Business To Customer) relationship.

On to Energy Networks 2019

I decided it would be pretty cool to take a few days off work, and go see how the big end of town do things. Trains, planes, and automobiles later, I was in Adelaide.

OK,  its DISCLAIMER time: Yes, I was there as a guest of Reposit. No, I was not under any instructions to say certain things or do certain things. You can believe what you wish in that regard, and you probably will!

All I know is I’ve seen the technology at work, and it is good.

While wandering around the displays, I saw a lot of people who are high up in the industry domestically, such as CEOs and COOs and other positions with abbreviations starting in “C”.

There were also overseas players like Enphase CEO Paul Nahi, who was in town to get a look at the scene, and back up their announcements about working in Australia.

Our nation is gunning for a leading role in battery implementation, to go with its solar PV penetration rate. If only our governments would see this and pull their finger out …

Of course, a few ruffians were about the joint like Giles Parkinson and Finn Peacock, to report on proceedings and relay the vibe.

It was slightly unusual that Reposit were bringing a customer to see the Networks, without a Retailer necessarily being in the way. The reasons why are down to what Reposit is offering to all layers of the market.

An Important Step

Things just got real in light of an announcement made last week by SA Power Networks (SAPN), the Network Distributor for South Australia.

They will be engaging 100 households in a Residential Battery Storage Trial in the Salisbury area, in the northern suburbs of Adelaide.

This is huge for customers, as they will benefit from installation of a subsidised system with either a Tesla Powerwall or Samsung ESS battery. Lower bills are practically guaranteed.

It gives the Network an unparalleled look at how battery technology can smooth peaks and troughs, and give them on-call resources in addition to existing generation. It may also help reduce network implementation and maintenance costs.

The smarts at the centre of systems installed? Reposit.

Bringing The Tech

That’s Dean Spaccavento, one of the founders of Reposit, being interviewed at the stand on Thursday. Good hustle!

In that shot, you can see a Macbook, which is running a live demonstration of the Reposit Marketplace application. This allowed networks to understand the capabilities Reposit from the back end, including the virtual power station concept.

The consumer end was demonstrated with a new iOS app, and as this involved dispatching power from my Powerwall, I made a couple of dollarydoos over the course of two days, which was a nice little bonus.

Together, the applications aptly demonstrated solving the problem for the network, and bringing the user into the circle of trust.

Along with a detailed rundown on how the Reposit Box makes decisions on behalf of the consumer, it provided a really good look at not only how the products work in theory, but how they were going to be applied for the SAPN trial. It is a very tasty thing to get a feel for it, while knowing a real-world scenario available for analysis over the coming months.

In addition to the Reposit team talking about technical aspects of the system, I personally fielded questions about where I sat as a consumer.

Understanding The Customer

For networks, the experience of battery users to date has tended toward those who want to get off the grid altogether, for two primary reasons:

The lifestyle consumer wishes to live in a location the grid can’t service today, typically in a rural area where land is cheaper. The capital cost of extending poles and wires can be prohibitive, so a battery system is often a better option, financially. At the same time, these people seek to build an efficient house, investing up front to ensure ongoing costs are minimal.

The combative consumer no longer wishes to pay for what they see as extortion from either the network, retailer, regulator, or government. Sometimes a combination of two or more. They tend to be older, cashed up, and technically minded. They’re ready to leave the grid at the drop of a hat, regardless of where they’re located.

In both cases, it is a very small percentage of households who can afford to take the option of off-grid living. Most of us don’t have money for enough batteries and solar panels to get us through a week of wet weather, and can’t even fathom being away from the safety of the grid.

Now, with the advent of smaller lithium storage tech, the networks and retailers are going to need to deal with a third type of consumer: the grid-connected battery user.

How to address this?

I suppose, after talking to a few people from the industry, some of whom alluded to specific service issues they were having in their backyard, the message I want to broadcast as a user is: don’t panic!

We Don’t Have Horns

A lot of us like having electricity that is reliable, safe, and affordable. While some might complain about their electricity bill, the fact is electricity still isn’t the biggest cost factor in a lot of households.

We’re not all about to up and leave the grid because Elon Musk mentioned it was a possibility. In a lot of cases, it still isn’t financially practical.

I spent a fair bit of money and solar + storage, and still have days where I run out of battery, or don’t fill it up. So I need the grid, because I don’t want to leave my family stranded. I also need fresh water connection and gas to cook with. This is all part of modern living.

What we want, as consumers, is to be treated fairly when it comes to giving you access to resources that we paid for. After all, it is what you expect in return for your resourcing of the grid.

Mistakes were made when it came to some of the early gross tariffs. Uptake of systems with a FiT of 40 cents / kWh or higher were higher than expected, probably due to poor planning.

That doesn’t mean the users contributing their exports outside those schemes should be given a rate approaching 50% of off-peak, either. It wasn’t our fault the government got a bit trigger-happy and / or gun shy about solar systems back in the 2000s.

Potential Solution

I don’t really have a problem with solar export being paid at rate smaller than the single-rate import tariff. And I realise a lynch mob will be after me for saying that.

It comes down to simple economics: as you can’t guarantee supply of solar from rooftop panels, you can’t expect to charge the same as a guaranteed supply from the grid. That said, 5c / kWh is bloody ordinary.

It might not matter for much longer, because batteries change this dynamic – I absolutely can guarantee the delivery of power from my battery.

It is stored, often idle, and usually ready to go during the day by 1PM, with about 6kWh to deliver outbound. Get hold of another 100-200 users with varying battery types, and that might be a Megawatt or more, to help you fill a hole.

Particularly with Reposit managing my usage, I’m confident that most days I’ll be available for you, provided I’m going to get fair recompense for use of my resources. After all, if you come to me, chances are its cheaper than going somewhere else.

I can see a point in the future where solar feed-in-tariffs are no longer used, because it will so be advantageous to own a battery and keep a steady stream of electrons moving through it, rather than from the panels. Retailers will run to this solution, and networks will benefit.

Its just a question of how the reward will be calculated.

Getting To Know You

The first step for any Network stepping into this brave new world might be a tighter relationship with Retailers, and disseminating information you have on where the industry is headed with batteries. In turn, they can share with you their experiences, and what they’re seeing out in customer land.

Together, you can get schemes like GridCredits moving, with early intervention to prevent another financial blowout like Gross Tariffs. Can’t leave these things to the government, based on experience so far.

Will you look to have a flat rate like Diamond Energy’s GridCredits 100 scheme? Can you leverage your existing market spot rate calculations to flow through to users or chip a little bit of profit off that? Those are big money questions that this IT guy doesn’t have answers to. Its a work-on for you and the rest of the industry.

It might even be that you need to provide information on the practical costs of peak demand to the consumer base, in order to give users a view that goes beyond a perception of simple greed.

Of course, there are some people you’ll never convince otherwise

You’re still unlikely to see mass defections from the grid, but as the price of batteries drops, certainly more people are going to investigate the outlay to do so.

Increase in batteries and PV is going to see a decrease in grid usage against projected growth, which is already softening on a per-capita basis. This might affect profitability, particularly where a network needs to be extended to reach a growing population.

Power Consumption Per Capita in Australia Credit: Trading Economics 

One of the facets of SAPN’s trial is to look at mitigating network capital costs by using the network resource that is user batteries. I’d be paying close attention to that, particularly where you are responsible for remote networks that require backup diesel generators etc.

How To Engage Consumers?

This is the multi-billion dollar question. As you may have surmised, I’m quite engaged.

Since this whole Powerwall thing landed in my lap, I’ve made it almost my second job to know everything I can know about how to most efficiently use the resources I have.

The rest of your customer base are probably going to tail away from that in terms of knowledge, right down to those who don’t understand the difference between Network and Retailer. They need help.

There is a wealth of data there, in terms of human feedback, that you – and the Retailers – need a relationship with. It will serve you well in the long term.

I shall sign off by imagining myself back in a trendy bar in an Adelaide laneway, hoping everyone looks forward to this bright new battery future as much as I do.

from https://www.sustainablefuturegroup.com.au/31/energy-networks-conference/ from https://sustainablfutg.tumblr.com/post/625137910434430976 from https://gracebolton.blogspot.com/2020/07/energy-networks-conference.html

[tamboradventure]

12 Things I’d Tell Any New Traveler

Updated: 7/10/20 | July 10th, 2020 (Originally published 3/30/15)

Hope. Fear. Excitement. Traveling for the first time produced a wave of emotions.

When I left to travel the world on my first round-the-world trip, I didn’t know what to expect.

Now, with fifteen years of travel experience under my belt, I know better. Traveling is second nature to me now. I land in an airport and I just go on autopilot.

But, back then, I was as green as they come.

To compensate for my lack of experience, I followed my guidebooks and wet my feet by going on organized tours. I was young and inexperienced and I made a lot of rookie travel mistakes.

I know what’s like to just be starting out and have a mind filled with questions, anxieties, and concerns.

So, if you’re new to travel and looking for advice to help you prepare, here are 12 tips that I’d tell a new traveler to help them avoid some of my early mistakes:  

1. Don’t Be Scared

Fear is a powerful deterrent. Taking the leap into the unknown is scary, but remember: you aren’t the first person to travel the world. You aren’t discovering new continents or exploring uncharted territories.

There is a well-worn travel trail out there and people to help guide you along the way. If millions of people can make their way around the world each year, you can too.

You’re just as capable as anyone else. After all, you did the hardest part: deciding to go. Having the courage to make that decision is the hardest part.

You’ll make mistakes. Everyone does. But that’s part of the experience.

There will be lots of people out there to help you. You’ll be shocked at just how helpful and kind people are. You’ll make friends, you’ll survive, and you’ll be better for it.  

2. Don’t Live by Your Guidebook

Guidebooks are useful for a general overview of a destination. They’re a great way to learn the basics and get introduced to the cities and countries you plan to visit. But you’ll never find the latest off-the-beaten-path attractions, bars, or restaurants in them.

For the latest info (as well as insider tips), connect with locals. Use websites like Meetup.com or Couchsurfing to connect directly with local and expats so you can get suggesitons, advice, and tips to make the most of your trip.

Additionally, ask other travelers you meet or the staff at your hotel/hostel. Visit the local tourist board as well. It’s a wealth of information that often gets overlooked.

In short, use a guidebook for the foundation of your plans but fill in the details with up-to-date info from locals.

You can also use travel blogs for planning tips since they are updated more often than guidebooks.  

3. Travel Slow

This is something most new long-term travelers learn the hard way (myself included).

I know it can be tempting to pack in as many cities and activities as possible. (This is especially true if you only have a few weeks of vacation.)

But rushing from city to city every other day is just going to leave you exhausted and stressed out. You’ll experience a whirlwind of activity, most of which will remain a blur when you look back on it. Sure, you’ll have some great pictures for Instagram but is that really why you’re traveling?

Travel is about quality, not quantity. Don’t worry about how much you see. Don’t worry about trying to impress people with the number of countries you’ve visited. Slow down and soak up your destinations. You’ll learn more, enjoy it more, and have a much more memorable experience.

When it comes to travel, less is more. (Plus, traveling slow helps reduce your transportation costs. It’s cheaper to go slow!)

  4. Pack Light

When I went to Costa Rica in 2003, I brought a bag filled with tons of stuff: hiking boots and pants, a fleece jacket, too much clothing, and my bodyweight in toiletries. And it all sat in my bag, mostly unused.

I was packing for “just in case” and “what if” instead of the reality of my trip.

While it can be tempting to bring more than you need “just in case,” remember this: you can buy things on the road. Socks, shampoo, jackets, new shoes — you can find it all aborad. There’s no need to bring everything and the kitchen sink.

So, pack light. You’ll have less to carry, saving you the hassle and stress of lugging a huge backpack around for weeks (or months) on end.

Unless you are going somewhere cold, a bag around 40 liters will suffice. Bags around this size are easier to carry, don’t get too unwieldy, and can fit on your flight as carry-on only if need be (a huge perk if you want to save yourself some headaches).

Here’s everything you need to know to help you find the perfect bag for your budget and your trip.  

5. Get Travel Insurance

Whether you’re a travel veteran or a brand new backpacker, don’t leave home without making sure you’re protected in case something goes wrong. As we learned during the COVID-19 pandemic, sudden emergencies can come out of nowhere.

I’ve had my luggage lost. I popped an eardrum in Thailand. I was knifed in Colombia.

I’ve had a friend break bones, need to be helicoptered out of the Amazon, or fly back due to a sudden death.

Stuff happens.

To ensure you’re protected, buy travel insurance.

I never leave home without it because I know just how quickly things can go sideways.

You never know what might happen. The road is filled with uncertainty. Make sure you’re protected. It will also give you peace of mind and help you travel with confidence.

Here are a few posts worth reading. I know it’s not a fun or sexy topic, but it’s an important one!

Is Travel Insurance Worth it?

The 7 Best Travel Insurance Companies

World Nomads Insurance Review

  6. Bring a Phone (and Get Local SIM Cards)

Having a phone with data means you can look up directions on the fly, make reservations, and contact emergency services if something happens.

Sure, there is free wifi pretty much everywhere these days so buying a local SIM card for data might seem like a waste of money (especially if you’re on a really, really tight budget) but having that immediate access to roaming data can be a lifesaver.

If you’re from the US and traveling for less than 3 months, T-Mobile has reliable data plans. Google Fi is another great option too.

Additionally, having a phone makes it easier to connect and stay in touch with travelers you meet.

Simply put: having a phone is really helpful in this day and age.

Just don’t stay glued to it all the time.  

7. Go with the Flow

When every day is planned out and there are timetables to follow, you’ll get stressed. Very stressed. You’ll rush around and be unhappy if there are any glitches in your well-curated schedule.

And there will be hiccups. And glitches. And all kinds of inconveniences, both major and minor. Life on the road doesn’t always go as planned — which is both fun and frustrating.

When you plan too much, there’s no room to experience the happy accidents of travel. There’s no room for spontaneous choice, for incorporating new information and advice that you learn.

When making your plan, make sure that it’s flexible. Learn to go with the flow. Plan one or two activities and let the rest of the day happen.

It’ll be a more enjoyable and less stressful experience. You’ll be surprised by what happens.

Be flexible. Let life unfold the way it should.  

8. Bring Some Extra Money

Travel isn’t as expensive as many people think but you still need to create a budget that means your needs. The secret to long term travel is smart money management.

However, always overestimate the amount you need. You never know what might come up on the road. After all, you didn’t spend all that time saving every penny and staying home to skip those once in a lifetime activities?

Maybe you want to try bungee jumping or you discover an amazing restaurant you can’t pass up. Or maybe you meet some cool people and decide to scrap your plan altogether.

No matter how well you plan, something can always come up that will throw your budget out of synch.

That’s fine.

Just leave home with a little extra. If you’re planning says you’ll need $2,000, bring $2,500. It will give you a buffer for emergencies and spontaneity.  

9. Remember Everyone is in the Same Boat

It takes courage to talk to strangers when you’re new to travel, especially if you’re an introvert like me. What do you say? Can you just invite people to join you? What if you end up alone?

These are all questions I had when I first started traveling. The good news? Everyone is in the same boat. All around you are other solo travelers looking for friends. They want to meet new people too.

While there are a few tricks to learn to help you meet people, it mostly just comes down to saying “hello” and taking that first step. Everything else will fall into place after that. You have nothing to lose and, in the process — this is how you’ll get over your shyness, make new friends, and get better at conversation.

  10. Be Adventurous

The only time we grow is when we’re outside of our comfort zones. And travel is about growth. That doesn’t mean you need to do dangerous things, but it does mean you need to push yourself beyond what you’re used to.

Hiking, sky diving, eating new foods, camping, rock climbing, hitchhiking — whatever taking a risk looks like to you is 100% ok. Everyone has different interests and tolerance levels. Push yours. It may be scary and uncomfortable at the time, but you’ll be glad you did it later.

Challenge yourself. Try new things. You’ll walk away more self-confident.  

11. It’s Ok to Change Your Mind

If you hate a city, leave and go to another one. If you don’t enjoy the tour your on, cancel it early. And if you really love the place you’re visiting, change your plans and stay longer.

It’s perfectly normal to change your mind on the road.

Maybe that means extending your trip. Maybe that means going home early. There’s nothing wrong with either choice.

Always remember you can go home if you aren’t having fun. You aren’t stuck with your decision to travel or your decision to be in a specific place. You’re the captain on your own ship. Never forget that!  

12. Remember, You’re Not Alone

Wherever you go, there is a network of travelers who will be your friends, give you advice or tips, and help you out. They will guide you, point you in the right direction, and be your mentors.

You aren’t out there on your own.

And you will be OK.

***

I know you’re nervous about heading out into the unknown. It’s human nature to worry. But, if you remember these words of wisdom, you’ll go into this the right mindset and able to avoid rookie mistakes.

So take a deep breath, relax, and enjoy your trip!

Book Your Trip: Logistical Tips and Tricks

Book Your Flight Find a cheap flight by using Skyscanner or Momondo. They are my two favorite search engines, because they search websites and airlines around the globe so you always know no stone is being left unturned.

Book Your Accommodation You can book your hostel with Hostelworld as they have the largest inventory. If you want to stay somewhere other than a hostel, use Booking.com, as they consistently return the cheapest rates for guesthouses and hotels.

Don’t Forget Travel Insurance Travel insurance will protect you against illness, injury, theft, and cancellations. It’s comprehensive protection in case anything goes wrong. I never go on a trip without it, as I’ve had to use it many times in the past. I’ve been using World Nomads for ten years. My favorite companies that offer the best service and value are:

World Nomads (for everyone below 70)

Insure My Trip (for those 70 and over)

Looking for the best companies to save money with? Check out my resource page for the best companies to use when you travel! I list all those I use — and they’ll save you time and money too!

The post 12 Things I’d Tell Any New Traveler appeared first on Nomadic Matt's Travel Site.

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Considering Expanding Your Business? 3 Tips on How to Approach It

Written by Justin Song, a senior research analyst at LendingTree where he has experience covering topics such as personal loans and small business lending.

Making smart decisions for your company is both your privilege and responsibility as a business owner. Chances are, when everything is running smoothly, you still see room for growth and want to explore how you can do so with as little risk to your current processes as possible. Knowing when to be in growth mode and when to hold back is a skill you develop as you become a seasoned entrepreneur. Below are some items to consider when deciding if an expansion if worthwhile.

1. Do you have enough cash?

One problem with many businesses is that they are cash poor. Even if business is booming, if you’re over-extended to business creditors and your debt payments are eating into your cash reserves, then you could be headed into the red even as sales soar.

You definitely don’t want this to happen to you, but there are usually ways to correct this course. First, lower your fixed expenses wherever possible. Do you need a fancy office, or can you get into a cheaper lease somewhere else?

Next, examine your debt: Are you paying too much interest? Is your debt negatively impacting your credit score to the point that you might be denied funding in the future (for reference, a credit score of 660 and above will give you the best chance to qualify for a loan).

Make sure you compare business loan terms before taking on any new business debt. Also, be sure to collect on any outstanding invoices. Consider shortening your due dates to a net-30 or net-15 to make sure you have more cash on hand.

2. Where in the business lifecycle are you?

Businesses often grow on an S-curve and there are three general stages of development—startup, midsize and full grown. Within these stages, you can group companies in different categories based on the number of employees, revenue or both. In between growth stages can be the most challenging time for expansion — say when a company is moving from three to eight employees. Another key growth stage is moving from a company of 12 to 40 employees.

These changes represent such fundamental shifts in how companies operate that business leaders often can’t navigate the challenges. So, before you start growing, you need to consider the size of your company, where you are in the life cycle, and how you’re going to efficiently get from point A to point B without suffering in between.

Perhaps most important of all, as your organization grows to each new stage in the life cycle, it’s your job as a leader to communicate those changes to everyone inside the organization, which can be more difficult to do the more employees you have Data show that 45.6 percent of employees ignore emails at work, so make sure before you start growing that you have a scalable communications plan in place to take all your employees along for the ride with you.

3. Can you handle new business costs?

Do you foresee new costs that you’ll have to budget for? Think about overhead costs such as salaries and office space as well as any regulatory costs for new markets or the cost of research and development of a new product.

Because you don’t want to burn through your cash while trying to grow your business, you need to handle the expense considerations of scaling carefully. Improve your processes to shorten the cycle of your business so that you can make cash faster. If it normally takes you two months to find a prospect, land a customer, invoice, and collect payment, look at every step along the way and try to find ways to shorten each time period.

Doing this will help you have more cash on hand at any given time so that you can handle the expenses of growth. You’ll need to grow with your industry, which is why you can get really left behind if you find yourself in a position in which your competitors can handle the cost of pursuing new business opportunities and you can’t.

The post Considering Expanding Your Business? 3 Tips on How to Approach It appeared first on Octane Blog – The official blog of the Entrepreneurs' Organization.

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What is the best cheap, reliable car insurance and why?

What is the best cheap, reliable car insurance and why?

So I m buying car insurance by myself for the first time and need to know what you feel is the best cheap car insurance and why? And in case anyone feels like being a smart butt, yes I do mean in America lol.

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :CARINSURANCEQUOTESHQ.XYZ

SOURCES:

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[douchebagbrainwaves]

CIRCUMSTANCES BEING WHAT THEY WERE, COMPANIES WOULD HAVE BEEN: SURE, GIVE 'EM WHATEVER THEY ASK FOR, SO LONG AS YOU'RE A PRODUCT COMPANY THAT'S MERELY BEING EXTRA ATTENTIVE TO A CUSTOMER, THEY'RE VERY GRATEFUL EVEN IF YOU DON'T WANT TO; YOU COULD TELL FROM THE CASE

But apparently hackers are particularly curious, especially about how things work. See Greenspun's Tenth Rule.1 Mark Zuckerberg at Startup School, he said they'd decided to build their software on Windows NT, and had just hired a very experienced NT developer to be their chief technical officer.2 They'd be in a rush to choose your life's work. In a way this is virtuous, because I think startups are a good thing. When you're running a startup you have to be the best you ever get. They wouldn't do it otherwise.

People may still watch things they call TV shows, but they'll watch them mostly on computers. How long will it take them to grasp this?3 He returned to Harvard for the fall semester after starting Microsoft. Here's a simple trick for getting more people to read what you write: write in spoken language. But you never had one guy painting over the work of multiple hands, though there may only be one name on the wall next to it in the museum. So a company that can attract great hackers will have a huge advantage. Bill Gates?

Even if math is upwind of economics, how are you supposed to know that as a replacement for don't give up on your dreams to what someone else can do, but you come from the corporate world and your friends, or even the fact that they have a single format.4 A startup now can be just a pair of 22 year old guys. I was taught, was a kind of mania for object-oriented programming is popular in big companies, because their software is probably going to be a general consensus about which problems are hard to solve, and what constitutes a good solution. For cases like that there's a more drastic solution.5 It might seem that nothing would be easier than deciding what you like, but it seems lame to use them. And finally, if a good investor in the startups is that there are two possible explanations: a it is finished, or b you lack imagination. Written language is more complex, which makes it more work to read. If startups are the first to go. It's the same with all of them.6

I'm describing already sounds too good to be true to think you could grow a local silicon valley by giving startups $15-20k each like Y Combinator there, but in software you want to make money that you can't do it by accident. 28%. They may have to use Java and Windows at work, but how to work together.7 Imagine what it would take if one did.8 Some hackers are quite smart, but when it comes to code I behave in a way that would make them unavailable to the people who make the most money: make the best surgeons operate with their left hands, force popular actors to overeat, and so on. They're like someone looking at a newborn baby and concluding there's no way this tiny creature could ever accomplish anything. He said he didn't think so, because the bugs are random.

They get new technology by buying the startups that can retain control tend to be people I know who favor markets are Marc, Jawed Karim, and Joe Kraus. Few would be willing to claim that it doesn't reduce economic inequality, you decrease the number of people who can be employed in an economy consisting of big, slow-moving companies with a couple thousand people each. That is wildly oversimplified, of course, since they read somewhere that's the optimum day to launch something. It's clear now that even by using the word convergence we were giving TV too much credit.9 There are a lot of what looks like work. Of course not. Before credentials, government positions were obtained mainly by family influence, if not outright bribery.10 Ironically, part of the training of engineers.11 If he was good, so I read it out loud and fix everything that doesn't sound like conversation.

I was a kid I thought they protected inventors from having their ideas stolen by big companies. The difference between the good ones. Seven years later I still hadn't started.12 The good news is that they're cheaper to produce. But you know perfectly well how bogus most of these are.13 What I'm telling you is that you will yourself misunderstand your work. I've never been 100% sure whether patents help or hinder technological progress.

Notes

Robert V.

MITE Corp. They'd be interchangeable if markets stood still. When that happens.

They don't make their money if they don't have to tell them about your conversations with VCs suggest it's roughly correct for startups that are still a few VC firms.

This probably undervalues the company is always 15 weeks behind the rapacious one. So if they don't know of a handful of lame investors first, and in some cases the process dragged on for months. Scheme: define foo n n _ Erann Gat's sad tale about industry best practice at JPL inspired me to address this generally misapplied phrase. VCs recapitalize the company really cared about users they'd just advise them to represent anything.

People were more the aggregate is what you learn in college. To do it mostly on your cap table, and they were already lots of options, because we know exactly what your body is telling you to two more investors. A larger set of plausible sounding startup ideas, because any invention has a similar logic, one of them is that so few founders do it for the next round, though I think the top startup law firms are Wilson Sonsini, Orrick, Fenwick West, Gunderson Dettmer, and one didn't try to avoid using it out of their initial funding runs out. Aristotle's contribution?

Again, hard work is in itself be evidence of a type II startups neither require nor produce startup culture. So instead of being interrupted deters hackers from starting hard projects.

The Sub-Zero 690, one could reasonably be with children, with number replaced by gender. Yahoo was their customer. Quite often at YC. But it was more rebellion which can make offers that super-angels gradually to erode.

What they must do is leave them alone in the few cases where you currently are. That's because the arrival of desktop publishing, given people the first half of it in the middle class values; it has about the Airbnbs during YC.

Just use the phrase frequently, you would never come face to face with the Supreme Court's 1982 decision in Edgar v. But it is genuine. This was certainly true in fields that have it as if you'd just thought of them had been able to raise money are saved from hiring too fast because they know you'll have to resort to raising money from the moment the time required to notice when it's aligned with the New Deal but with World War II.

S P 500 CEOs in 2002 was 35,560. That's why startups always pay equity rather than by you based on their utility function for money.

If they want to invest in syndicates. See, we should be asking will you build this? You'll be lucky if fundraising feels pleasant enough to turn into other forms of inequality, and you'll probably have some kind of secret about the origins of the present that most people who did it.

This is why they tend to have lunch at the time it takes a few months later.

That makes some rich people move, but Joshua Schachter tells me it was worth about 30 billion. Investors are one of the great painters in history supported themselves by painting portraits. They found it easier for some reason, rather than geography. He was off by only about 2%.

[cashare]

Smart Budgeting To Save For Vacation

Are you longing for a vacation? Getting away is often at the top of people’s lists of things to do, but you can’t vacation for free.

When you do get to take a break, you need to cover a number of costs if you want to travel somewhere. From the cost of your journey to food and fun activities, it can all add up to a lot of money. But lots of people manage to travel much of the time, despite not being rich. Part of their strategy is usually to travel cheaply, but being able to save smartly is also essential. Here’s what you need to do to save for your vacation.

Research the Cost of Your Vacation

Before you start saving, it can be a good idea to think about how much your vacation might cost. Instead of just saving a random amount of money and seeing how far it can go, you can do some research. Making a budget for your vacation will help you to set a goal so that you know how much to save. You can even create several different goals to aim for. Start with a minimum amount that you need to take your vacation. Then have a goal to reach if you want to be able to splash out a bit more or even live the high life while you’re away.

Create a Monthly Savings Goal

Once you have an idea of how much money you want to have for your vacation, it’s a good idea to make it more manageable. Saving regularly will help you to see how close to your goal you’re getting. Try dividing your end goal by however many months you have until you want to go or until you want to book your vacation. You can try to save that amount each month, and you can watch your vacation money pot go up every month. And if you have any extra, you could put that in too.

Save Without Noticing

Whether or not you choose to save a set amount each month, there are other ways to save too. One way that some people save is by using apps that save money for them without them having to really even think about it. For example, Digit takes out small amounts of money until eventually it all adds up and you’ve saved a significant amount before you know it. Or if you often pay for things with cash, you could put your change into a moneybox or somewhere else to keep it safe.

Identify Budgeting Cutbacks

Reconfiguring your monthly budget can help you to save a lot of money. Even if you have a solid budget now, there are often still ways that you can save money by cutting back. Start by looking at any monthly expenses that you might have, like energy costs, to see if you’re able to find a cheaper option or cut back on your usage. Take a look at your grocery bill to see if you could spend less on food and household goods. Meal planning can be a very effective way to save and to avoid wasting food.

Earn Some Money on the Side

Increasing your income by even a small amount could be a great idea if you want to save for your vacation. You might think that you don’t have time to earn any more money, but there are various ways to create another income stream without having to take on a second job. You might have something that you can sell, either just in your home or something that you can make and sell to others. You can even make small amounts doing things like filling out surveys, being a mystery shopper or getting cash back and rewards on purchases.

Find Cheaper Ways to Have Fun

You don’t want to make yourself miserable trying to save for your vacation. However, if you cut back on how much you spend on entertainment and fun things now, you’ll have more money for them on your vacation. It doesn’t take much to eat at home instead of going out or getting takeout, and it’s easy to skip a night out on the town now and then. Put what you would have spent into your savings so that you can immediately feel good about your decision.

Start saving for your vacation now and you could soon have a sizeable amount put away for your next trip. You don’t have to be rich to go traveling. And if you decide you need a cash advance to cover vacation costs to enjoy some time away, Snappy Payday Loans can help with that too.

The post Smart Budgeting To Save For Vacation appeared first on Snappy Payday Loans.

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[mojput-mypath]

My full-timer story

What does it even mean to be full-time in Art of Living? For me it means being a full-time devotee, with less or no needs of my own. Being available for what is needed out there, without much personal agenda. Even in the role of a full-time teacher, we want to achieve, we want to own, we want to succeed, we want to save the world, we want. Slowly, but surely, coming to the realisation that even the desire to serve in this or that way, is another desire. Another ‘want’, another pull into a direction we desire, that does not allow ourselves to flow with what is laid out for us. Ultimately, even that desire is part of each and everyone’s personal life flow.

The first time I have done a Silence course in my life, I felt so bad. I felt my body was being beaten like a dusty carpet. After the dust was thoroughly removed, at the end of the 7-day meditative journey with Swami Sadyojathah and (then) Swami Pragyapad, I sat in the sun in front of our Spring Hall in Bad Antogast. My dynamic YES!+ teacher (Vesna Horvat) was sitting next to me, smiling. I had only one question in my heart and mind; from the deepest silent space within me I asked: “How do I become a full-time teacher of ‘this’?” Meaning, how can I make my entire life and every cell of my body, and each inch of my mind dedicated to this Knowledge, Practices and Path? She smiled more broadly, and said: “Easy, you just need to watch some videos and do a few more things, and you’re there”. I was thrilled. It was 2007.

A few years later, after my Path had its starting ups and downs, I longed to do a youth program, called ‘YES! We Can’. I cried when it was held in Bad Antogast for the first time, for not being able to join. Just a few years later, my opportunity came. The same program was then held in Bulgaria. It was closer by, it was cheaper, the timing was better. I had no money, so I hitchhiked most of the way and took a long train ride to come. I had not expected to become a teacher that year, in 2010, but did. The Teacher Training was included in the program, with the superbly sharp, yet gentle Kamlesh Patel. There I was, a teacher. The same year, Gurudev visited Milan, and so did I. 5 years after doing my first Art of Living course (breathe SMART, a youth-oriented drug-prevention program, subsidised from a government project), I wanted to speak to my Master. I asked only one question: “Should I be full-time?” The answer came with the most beautiful, widest smile in the Universe: “Yeeeeees!”

I took it seriously, I felt I needed to go ‘somewhere’ to teach. It came to my attention that there was a need for a teacher in Iceland. Well, that seemed interesting. I did all the research, spoke to the people involved and pushed myself through to come to Iceland. I was de-recommended a few times to go, but unsurprisingly, according to my general personality, I forced nature to get me to that place.

My first Art of Living project as a full-time teacher, immediately after becoming a teacher! I was super enthusiastic. Arriving to Iceland, I felt I would be moving mountains. I arrived – no one at the airport. As I was, like usual, quite broke, I hitched a ride to the residence of my host. She introduced me to her house and surroundings, and in a matter of a day, left, not to come back for another two weeks. Boy, was I alone in those weeks. I started to compose my little songs and I did a lot of practice. The challenges were huge, but I was just so driven to overcome them all. 


 After three months, and not much progress in reality, I was sent home with a resignation letter. “Gurudev has opened the door for you to be full-time, but now you need to prove that you can do it differently.” I spent a few years out of Croatian’s capital, searching for smaller communities and more peaceful environments. Iceland has taught me to appreciate being alone. A couple of years later, after more roller-coaster rides with and without Art of Living, I was invited to come to India for a short-term social media project. Of course I wanted to go to India, it is the Capital of the Art of Living World. The plan was to stay for three months and come back to continue with my life. Finish Uni, find a job, get married and all that jazz?

The moment I landed in the Ashram in Bangalore, I slept for a few hours (jet-lagged), to be woken up and directly taken to a meeting with Gurudev, with my new team, the Web Team. Soon after, I was praying and begging the Universe for the opportunity to stay in India indefinitely. The idea of the desired life in Croatia seemed so far away and meaningless, in the face of the daily craziness and loveliness of living in the Ashram village. It was also the best work experience I had in my life! It was the best spiritual experience I had so far as well. It was so challenging, but also simultaneously brought so much relief. After 6 months, I had planned to go to Croatia and come back, but was asked to stay and extend my visa without going home.

During this time, I had asked Gurudev a few times if I should be full-time, which was redundant, as I was already working in the ashram, and have been receiving a scholarship, as the time I stayed was so long. He kept saying “Yes, yes”, and I kept feeling: “Am I really full-time?” As the full-time work included the web work, and not teaching. But he said again and again: “Yes, yes.” When I wanted to do other things, outside Art of Living, he would gently ask me what it is, what I would like to do, and if I can do it within the organisation.  

I finally went home after one year. I really wanted to come home. I missed my life and my family. Only three weeks later, I ended up in the German ashram. I did not plan to come, but something inside me was telling me: “Go, go!” The moment I came up the stairs to the reception, I felt all my newly made plans for life in Croatia were again so silly and I wished and wished and cried out in wanting to stay in the Ashram. I had the same experience a few years back, before India, I sat in front of the Bad Antogast Ashram fireplace with my sister, and with tears in my eyes, explained how I longed to be here always and never have to come back to my life in Croatia. Wishes do come true, we only do not know when.

I came to Gurudev, this time with an open heart, for any suggestions. I asked: “What can I do?” He asked me nicely: “Would you like to to stay here (in the Ashram)?”. At that time, after India, I had an idea how I would travel and teach, so I was disappointed with the offer. I said: “No!” He gently replied that we will plan something for me and had sent me out of the meeting room. Just a few hours later, it dawned on me: He was suggesting me to stay. I better stay. There is always the right time for the right things, only we usually wish them to come sooner than they do.  

So, I stayed. For two years and four months. A difficult time. In India, there was so much relief after every problematic situation, and here, I had to take care of others, and who could take care of me? I had to learn a lot, and I did. I kept asking him if I can leave, or do something else. And in more than one way we gently suggested me to stay. What I really learned in this time was how to face discomfort and stay with what was offered, instead of taking the easy way out. That entire time of my stay in the Ashram, I longed to be in Croatia, go out, have normal friends, be more in touch with my family. ‘The grass is always greener’ syndrome, right?

After the long dragging years, full of challenges, I started to love staying in Germany and knew something must be up soon. In a matter of two months, everything changed again, and I was on my way to be full-time in Croatia. My sister stayed back in the Ashram. We were happy for a day, thinking we would stay together in Bad Antogast, cos she just got a job there, but soon after, the decision was made that I will be moving to Croatia. Everyone their separate ways.

I was happy and excited to go out there and live the full-timer life as well as be involved into my regular life, people and activities. It was good, but hard work. I had spent four years living in ashrams, and I felt very alone. Soon I made friends, and recovered old friendships. I was living at the seaside, enjoying the lovely sun-filled days, going to concerts and dancing from time to time. But I missed my Ashram Sangha.

I moved along, did my very best to move things in the place I was living. Things went slow. I had all my worldly pleasures, I had lived in a partnership for a while, I had lovely residences, I was close to family, I enjoyed the company and the environment. Yet, something was missing. I felt all the time I could do more and better, and felt unsatisfied with how things went. I felt I could do more and more and more, but somehow life was putting me down. Finally, I decided to quit the Art of Living job and do something else. Feeling that if I earn more money and have my own choices about projects, I could contribute even more to Art of Living as a free agent. So, even that came true. I had my own business and was making some money, with the promise that it would only be more prosperous. But. I was deeply saddened for not being full-time anymore. Those short two months seemed to drag in desperation of losing a purpose, a heart-filling life purpose. What I did was also helping people grow and heal, but it just did not have the same flavour as my Art of Living environment that I had belonged to for 13 years already.

I had intended to stick to my newly-chosen life and had no intention of coming back to Art of Living for a long while. Yet, the divine had other plans. Sooner than you know it, I was back in front of Him, sharing how broken-hearted I was for not working for the organisation. He suggested a different place to live. This game-changer gave yet another promise of new beginnings and a new hope that things would be much better this time.

With no intention to stay in Ashrams, I had planned to go and live in Croatia’s capital and had plans for new projects and financing. But before that was to be realised, I had some time, and decided to come to the Ashram for the summer. Actually, at first Ashram was in the plan, then I realised I needed to earn more and looked for a job outside, but somehow, unavoidably ended up in the Ashram, employed for the summer.

I had many options and all were good in their own way. This time he had not suggested anything, like in previous instances, and just said: “You can choose.��� This time it was clearer than the clearest sky: I wish to stay in the Ashram. I wish to be full-time. That is the only thing I ever really wanted in this life. I want to be / do / breathe full-time for the Art of Living or any of its departments and varieties.

So, here I am, back to my forest home, amongst people I have known for so long, with projects I know so much about, in the environment I feel is the most comfortable for me.

It took me so long to be in the space I am in right now. 11 years ago, I knew that the only thing I wanted to be in this life, is full-time for Art of Living. 11 years later, after all the roller-coasters, I feel I am finally where I wanted to be then.

There is this inner satisfaction with everything that comes my way, even if I struggle in between. I know I am in the right place. I know I am where I always wanted to be. I have no more desires to do other things, because I did, and they did not make me truly fulfilled.

Yes, however weird it may sound, I wish to serve a purpose that my Master put in front of me. Everything else in my life is secondary. Which does not mean I do not love my family, country or friends, and that I have nun-style renounced everything and everyone. No. It means I have known my life purpose for so many years and I am finally living it full-heartedly. With full love and gratitude for all experiences in my life. With full dedication to my family and friends at home, I know I need to be where I am right now.

I have finally made a decision. My own decision, based on what I feel and what I want. Not what others think is best for me, not even my Guru.

I have finally made peace with the decision of how to live my life. And this is it!

I feel so much more relaxed, I feel deep peace and openness to do and be wherever it is needed. I feel I have so much more decisive power over my own life and yet, at the same time, complete dedication to my Master, and to whatever he suggests me to do.

The thing is that this entire time a game was played, for me to realise I have absolute control and I have no control at all. Life will show me what is next, and I will be where it is needed.

Thank you for listening all this time. This entire journey has been written in detail on this blog, from 2010, when I left for my Teacher Training (the YES! We Can program).

Love and blessings to all those who made all my experiences difficult and easy. Both made me into who I am today.

Looking forward to what is waiting around the next corner – to all the new challenges and flows and learnings.

Jai Guru Dev (I wish victory to the great divine within you)

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*Image quotes taken from here: https://thisisnthappiness.com/post/171445751064/born-on-this-day-dr-seuss