#or just something related to the past in general
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Messages From Your Forever Person
Pile 1 - Pile 2 - Pile 3
Remember, this is a general reading and it may not resonate for everyone or completely. Tarot is a tool to help guide but you are responsible for your actions and life, you choose your path.
Just a note!: I don’t like doing general love readings because I don’t feel like they are as personal as, well, personal love readings, but I had the urge to make one. Your forever person can be what you consider your significant other, long-term partner, or future spouse.
Tips!
|Pile 1
Tarot: King of Pentacles, The Fool, Ace of Pentacles, Three of Pentacles, Black Numen, Six of Wands, Knight of Pentacles, Three of Swords, Ace of Swords, The Star, Ten of Cups (Bottom of the Deck:
Oracle: Uplift, Forgiveness, Consistency
You know how the planet Jupiter is the defender of our solar system? How Jupiter pulls asteroids away from Earth and even take the hits itself? That’s the energy of this person. As soon as I pulled the cards, I got the feeling of comfort from a strong and stable energy. I must say, this person also has a comforting smile and as soon as you look at them, your nerves will instantly be soothed. They feel like they are standing beside me, hands in pockets, as they watch me write this. They could have a favorite cream cable knit sweater that they like to wear as soon as there’s a chill in the air.
They are very patient and have the mentality of “it doesn’t have to be perfect, it just has to be done”. You could suffer from anxiety, but I feel this panicked and shaky energy coming from you. I don’t know if you used to be yelled at or punished for doing something wrong by a parent or partner, but it feels like you are terrified of doing anything around your forever person at first. And there are cards here that are telling me that you have been hurt in the past. It seems like this could be the first safe and healthy partner you’ve had. This could just be the first partner you’ve ever had and now you're 20/25+ years old and you don’t know what you’re doing, which brings out this anxiety towards this relationship. But your partner here holds a lot of patience and comfort for you! They really love you. Honestly, this is really fucking close to unconditional love (which is rare). They hold no judgement towards how you operate now because of your past, absolutely not. And they want you to know that. It’s like they have told you this but you continuously don’t believe them, which does hurt them a little ngl. The Jupiter reference could be what this was for. They will take the small hurts you do but persistently and consistently show up until you believe in their love for you. And it’s not that you don’t know, but there is a voice in your head that makes you doubt often even if there isn’t proof of those thoughts.
God, pile 1, they love you. They are such a steady energy. They are also very stable in the physical and spiritual realms. They are a very hard worker and would do anything to help your dreams become a reality. Your dreams are their dreams and vice versa. They really just want a peaceful home life with you honestly; they like the simple things. I think a good personality reference would be the husband to the pregnant wife in Kiki’s Delivery Service.
They really want me to drive home the message of forgiving yourself, pile 1. Sure, your actions or thoughts do hurt them sometimes, but they don’t really want that to be the focus. They want you to be aware that they do but in a way to help you heal. They aren’t your past partner, they aren’t going to react like your parent, they aren’t playing you just because you haven’t had a partner. It’s heartbreaking that you would dare to even compare them to others. Maybe this person hides a lot of their hurt not to upset you and this is a hurdle that they have to work through. It’s only really coming out towards the end so that’s why I want to say that.
I think this message was to let you know how the beginning part of your relationship will be like. They just want to make you aware of it, maybe so you can comfort the insecurities you have so the beginning won’t be as difficult.
|Pile 2
Tarot: Ten of Swords, Queen of Pentacles, Six of Swords, The Hierophant, Three of Pentacles, King of Cups, Three of Cups, The Sun, King of Pentacles, Seven of Pentacles, The High Priestess, The Moon
Oracle: The Moon (again!), Wept Breath, The Chariot, Vulnerability, Divinity, Sacred
Before I pulled the cards, I heard six months to a year or eight weeks. I don’t like to do timing but that’s what I heard. So if that feels right to you, then take it. Or somewhere between a waning crescent and a waning gibbous moon.
Honestly, they are just happy to be here. I think they were ready to give up on love after so many failed attempts and heartbreak before you came along. And you honestly could’ve sworn off love too but you saw them and was like “I want that one.” This is the black cat, golden retriever pile. Raven and Beast Boy, Maleficent and Diaval, or Roger Rabbit and Jessica Rabbit.
The vulnerability oracle strongly comes from your side. It does come from theirs but they admit that they were practically enchanted by you. “The idea of giving up on love was a stupid idea on their part, sorry your highness, that was my bad.” They just folded and they would happily fall under any love spell you send their way. They are obsessed with you, in the most healthy way possible. They are banging the table with their fist, credit card in hand. There’s an energy that you were in the same room with them and kept your eye on them because you were drawn to how “pathetic” they were. You couldn’t help yourself so you gave in. There’s also an energy of “of course, you’re the fated one to be with me.” You two end up talking and you could kinda bust their balls a little, tease and be a little sassy, but they keep up with you and “pass your little test.”
I don’t think they were necessarily a player in the past but they had quite a few lovers and most of them played your person. They could have the vibe of one just from how cheeky and flirty they are but those thoughts are soon squashed with you seeing how pathetically devoted they are to you. They are just a lover at their core, they like to keep things light and fun, but they also know how to be serious and fix any issue that comes up in the relationship. They would truly do anything for you. This could come from an insecurity of not getting the love they needed from their past partners so they are overcompensating to keep you in love with them. :(
Are these the older daughters/siblings that I usually get? There could be something here that they have a pretty put-together family and you’re the first partner that the family actually loves. You could honestly get the love and care that you missed out on with their family.
God, I keep seeing your partner looking at you with the biggest heart eyes and they do this all the time, which could make you so flustered. This could be one of the things about them that honestly gets you to melt a little and lower some walls you have up. This feels like a love that you probably didn’t get to experience in your teen years but this will span on until you're old and wrinkly. They will carry the “honeymoon phase” through the rest of your lives. You know those videos that people make of their parents being in love and fooling around? That’s you two!
There’s just an overall feeling of excitement coming from them. They could talk about you a lot to their friends and family, but not in a bragging way. They are just so happy with you and thinks you’re the most beautiful person they have ever seen. I heard “A wish I didn’t know I was wishing for.”
|Pile 3
Tarot: Two of Cups, King of Swords, The Hermit, The Fool, ? Dreamworld (reconnection), Six of Wands, Two of Wands, Four of Pentacles, Five of Cups, The Chariot (rest, feeling at home)
Oracle: Serenity, Sincerity, Respite, Surrender
If this resonates, this could be a lover you had that had passed away.
For others, this pile is for the ones who believe in lifetimes before the one you’re currently living. Energy is recycled after all. This is the more mystical pile.
Your person here has a large energy and could come off as cold and intimidating. They have come to me wearing all black, leather boots, and darker hair. They have very muscular arms and a broad chest, very tall. They could be goth. This could’ve been them in the past life or that is how they show up in this lifetime. They have their head down as they stand beside me and there is an energy of wanting you to know they are here. Their soul does watch over you and guide you but they may stay quiet and don’t give you many signs or messages that they are around. But I suppose they came through today to say hi!
They are very protective over you and they think you’re a ray of sunshine that graces their life. They aren’t one to show many emotions nor really speak them out, but you accept this and know that you are deeply loved. They know you doubt that they even exist or if they are coming or if they love you and so they are very hesitantly showing up through this reading to say that “I’m on my way” and “just sit tight.” They could have a deeper voice. They could give you reassurance if you ask for it, by the way! They want me to specify that so they don’t come across as heartless. I think you’re the only one that they truly love with their whole being and they do make it known, but if you need a little verbal reassurance, all you gotta do is ask. They are a cat person.
There is something here that you may have lived in timelines where they never got to exist in, like it has been a long while since you two have been together. I heard, “I waited for the right time.” There could’ve been timelines where your lives probably wouldn’t have worked together or it was going to end in tragedy “like the one I met you in.” So they had to wait. And they watched over you through each timeline. Everytime you didn’t get to live a happy lifetime or if your partner of any lifetime didn’t treat you right, it would make your person terribly upset and they couldn’t do anything about it. They are very upset while they show this to me, angry and frustrated. But this lifetime is the one where you two will finally be together.
You could feel like you are meant to be someone, like a little void spot where your soul is…and you could be waiting out until you meet this person. You actually could’ve done this for the past three lifetimes (which you probably lived more happily than others). And this could’ve been a lifetime where you planned to do the same thing, but your person is coming in. You will be suspicious but you will probably be very enamoured by them. They are different than others and stand out to you. I think they like to rub your back because I just got the feeling of someone doing that to me. They let you be your bubbly and lively self and actually love that about you. They have complete trust in you. They may be on the more quiet/shy side but you two work together perfectly. You two can rest easy in this lifetime.
Dividers: @inklore
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my favourite character exchange of all time between the hoo gang will always be this particular line from jason to nico in house of hades.
“Nico, you do choose how to live your life. You want to trust somebody? Maybe take a risk that I'm really your friend and I'll accept you. It's better than hiding”
jason doesn't say something like 'i'll make sure to prove myself to you' or 'i'll do everything I can to make sure I earn your trust' because they are empty words. especially considering that this was before jason knew about nico's past, he can't exactly do anything to make nico trust him, apart from offering support, because in the end, it was nico's choice whether to trust him or not.
yeah, some people might think jason was being 'cold' and 'shallow' for saying this, but jason genuinely MEANT well. he told nico that he's WILLING to be his friend even before he knew nico's past. this was before jason knew an OUNCE of nico's backstory. he gave some slightly harsh but brotherly advice to him.
jason didn't deliver any false promise to nico that everyone will love him no matter what and that everyone will always be kind to him in camp half blood (this strangely parallels w percy deliberately choosing to NOT promise nico that he'll keep bianca safe because percy knew that death is a possibility and didn't want to make any fake promises just because nico is a kid, percy tried his hardest to be honest with nico, that certainly caused problems of course, but we can see the pattern between how percy and jason both hated fake promises.)
also, in boo, will says “Oh, please. Nobody at Camp Half-Blood ever pushed you away. You have friends or at least, people who would like to be your friend. You pushed yourself away. If you'd get your head out of that brooding cloud of yours for once”
i know I've seen alot of people use this excerpt as consensus of saying that will is super 'tone deaf' and 'insensitive'. but can you guys see the pattern here? will came off a lot more agressive bc of his romantic feelings, but we can see how will, jason and percy were sort of 'reality checks' that nico NEEDED. he had an inferiority and victim complex (which is very justifiable and valid considering how much trauma he faced, I quite related to nico a lot when it comes to the personality sometimes so jason's words definitely struck a nerve for me) but nico was always drawn to honesty.
nico had some of his earlier memories washed away by the river lethe to 'protect' him from more trauma, and nico was so attached to bianca that the thought of her leaving for the hunters of artemis felt like a personal betrayal. he was made to beleive that he and his sister were safe in camp half blood, and combining that w the whole lethe thing and hades generally trying to protect the di angelo family from the gods, you can see how much nico needed honesty and not coddling. because coddling and sheltering ruined his life and took away his light.
jason saying that nico needed to take risks as it comes with the package of love and friendship, and overall giving him authenticity, telling him that heartbreak and family can coexist, causes nico to be drawn to him and genuinely have him an eye opener.
jason knew what it was like to be held with fake promises his whole life, and even mentions it as a reason as to why he made sure he kept the promises he made. because he would never turn out to be like his two faces mother beryl.
I'll always believe that jason played a huge part in nico's overall character, and his death even more so.
#I'm back at it again w my weekly dose of analysis#jason is so insightful to me. people find his honesty cold and conceding but it's my favourite part of him.#pjo#percy jackson fandom#percy jackson#percy pjo#percy series#percy jackon and the olympians#heroes of olympus#hoo toa#pjo hoo toa#jason grace#rrverse#hoo#hoo fandom#pjo hoo#nico di angelo#house of hades
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So I wrote this post the other day about my feelings on the handling of the BuckTommy breakup (which you can read here if you want). And @parrishjeanna reblogged with a link to an article from Tim. I wrote out a reply to it but it became so long I needed to put it in a separate post because it’s over 3k and I need to put it until a readmore.
Okay so I did read that article thank you @kawaiifacesong for linking the not generating revenue clicks because I don’t like reading any articles for 9-1-1 because it’s literally all buddies who can’t ask anything about the show. (Case in point, in this particular interview, the interviewer brings up “The Couch Theory” because Buck and Eddie sit on a couch.)
So this interview was trash for many reasons but I’ll narrow it down to three for the sake of this response: Biphobic nature of the breakup and aftermath, what’s being said in interviews isn’t what we’re seeing, and Tim writes as he goes so there’s no actual plan going forward.
First: The Biphobic Nature of this breakup is still moving full swing.
The idea that Buck is “still figuring himself out” and needs to explore is insulting in so many ways—especially to myself as a bisexual lady in my 30s. Firstly, being in my 30s, the idea that you need to figure yourself out still is absolute bullshit. Yes, you can still find new things out about yourself and make some changes, but usually by this point in your life, you have a pretty decent handle on who you are as a person. Which Buck does have… and we’ve seen that? So it has to be a reference to his newly discovered and realized sexuality.
Which, AGAIN is so biphobic and plays into incredibly harmful bisexual stereotypes that bisexuals need to “explore” to figure out what or who they want. This means either they need to fuck around and make sure they’re really bisexual. OR they need to get enough experience with their same gender to then be able to have a same-gendered relationship. Both of which are insulting and harmful. This idea that Tommy couldn’t possibly be a lasting relationship because Buck just came out as bisexual is wrong. It’s fine if they didn’t want Tommy to be a long-term love interest or even an end-game love interest, but why couldn’t they have done it differently, to hopefully not play into these harmful stereotypes that are still incredibly prevalent today.
Now do I think they fully intended it to play out as biphobic as it is? Not really, but I do think that the heart of what they wanted—Buck exploring his sexuality—is inherently biphobic because of the way they have chosen to go about it. There’s a world of difference between having Tommy break up with Buck so Buck can go exploring and having OS and TM saying similar things in interviews and Tommy and Buck breaking up and Buck getting back out there and dating around. Which if they had given it just a smidge of thought, I have to hope they would have come to that same conclusion and maybe gone about it in a different way.
Second: What Tim’s saying in interviews about what’s happening on the show and in these storylines doesn’t match up to what we’re seeing
I’m going to paste the few paragraphs related to BuckTommy break up here, just to read. I have bolded what I thought was important and what I’m going to talk about after it.
“Look, I think the breakup was premature, but that was by design. For me, the story that I was trying to tell was here’s a guy, Tommy. He’s not a main character on the show. We haven’t done ‘Tommy Begins’ or something. But you do see him in the ‘Begins’ episodes, in flashbacks, and by the time he leaves in ‘Bobby Begins Again,’ he’s turned over a new leaf. He’s feeling more comfortable. He’s hanging out with the new people at the 118 once Bobby takes over, and they throw him a party and bake him a cake when he goes off to his new post. There was even a reference in Broken when Chimney calls him to do the water drop,” Minear explained. “But Tommy’s a guy who’s in a different place in his life than Buck is. And I think what Tommy realizes is exactly what he said, which is, ‘I’m not your last. I’m your first.'” Minear referenced the coffee shop scene in Season 7, where Buck asked Tommy to give them another shot and come to his sister’s wedding, as a point when Tommy thought, “Alright, this guy’s kind of great. He’s super hot and he’s sweet. And this will be nice. And I’m going to be vulnerable for this.” As the relationship grew stronger and the stakes grew higher, however, Tommy reevaluated things. “I think Tommy, in the end, understood that this was not forever — that Buck is exploring himself. He’s still figuring himself out. And even if Tommy doesn’t know it, he might sense the fact that Buck likes to jump in with both feet a little bit precipitously,” Minear mused. “So was the breakup premature? Yes. Because Tommy was put in a position where he had to be honest. And once he speaks the truth, which is, ‘I think I know where this ends, and I can’t move in with you,’ he’s kind of breaking the spell — the spell of that honeymoon. Tommy even says, ‘I didn’t see this coming either.’ I don’t think either one of them did.”
Okay, lots of things happening in this quote but ultimately there’s a massive disconnect in what TM thinks is happening or what he’s saying is happening and what is actually on screen—and that’s a huge problem. You can’t rely on interviews to explain things, it needs to be in the actual text of the episode.
I think the real crux of the issue is this: “Tommy’s a guy who’s in a different place in his life than Buck is… Tommy, in the end, understood that this was not forever… he’s kind of breaking the spell—the spell of that honeymoon.”
Let’s break this down a bit. Tommy being in a different place in his life than Buck… How? Buck has, since the pilot episode, been looking and searching for a stable romantic relationship—he’s always craved that and wanted that. Even in the breakup, he was thinking about their future and marriage and moving in with Tommy. Is that not what the next logical step of a relationship might be? So doesn’t that—regardless of whether it was premature or not—prove that Buck and Tommy are in the same place of clearly wanting a long-term, committed relationship? So if this wasn’t the case, why didn’t you show that? Show them having that disconnect or make it clear that Tommy’s dropping hints about their future and Buck is not in the same place so he’s not picking up on them at all. Because what we saw was Buck wanting and seeing a future with Tommy and Tommy basically telling him that the doesn’t actually.
“Tommy, in the end, understood that this was not forever — that Buck is exploring himself. He’s still figuring himself out.” This is my villain origin point—for real. Because this is also not what we saw! What we saw, was a Buck who was so secure in himself and his relationship, arguably for the first time on this show, that he didn’t panic or second-guess anything really. He was all-in with Tommy and enjoying himself and being with Tommy. He even said that being with Tommy makes him more comfortable with himself—aka what a lot of couples say when they’re in committed and reciprocal, healthy romantic relationships—that being with you makes me happy being me. (Paraphrasing here, but hopefully my point gets across.)
Because what is there for Buck to figure out yet? He knows he’s bisexual and incredibly into Tommy. He’s happy and content with his work life and seems pretty happy with where he’s living. His relationships with his friends and family are all as good as they usually are. So what is there for Buck to still figure out? I’m left to assume that this is again only about his sexuality, which just keeps adding more to the pile of shit that makes me feel crappy and uncomfortable with this storyline.
Also, why couldn’t Buck and Tommy last? Why is that assumed to be the correct conclusion to come to? How many high school sweethearts get together and last? How many people who don’t date until they’re in their 20s-30s find someone right away and stay together? How many people come out as queer later in life because they have found someone they click with and it just makes them see more of themselves and they stay together? Sure, this is not the case with every single person in these situations, but it’s not unheard of. To me, this just feels like the show and Tim are acting like Buck is a young, 20-year-old child and now a grown man in his 30s…
What we actually saw on our screens, was two people who genuinely seemed to enjoy each other and spending time together. That had an easy and sweet relationship, where they both felt settled and comfortable together. It’s why the weird change in 806 felt so abrupt—what do you mean these two people who had amazing communication up until that point, have not talked about their past relationships at all? I think that was done as a shortcut for the writers and TM to say, “Look, see, they’re not compatible, they can’t last because they’re not talking about anything serious.” But again, my point is: then you should have showed us that beforehand, given some foreshadow or lead up to it. Instead, they chose to blindside the audience for the “shock value” and it didn’t work. Shock value for shock value’s sake never works for the audience. They don’t want the rug to be pulled out from under them, they want to see you building something and only after it’s built can they see what you were doing the whole time.
Now, I understand that they just wanted to break them up for “story” reasons (which I have no faith is going to be anything good). While I personally hate that because I feel like there would have been much more storylines and things for Buck to be involved in and it would have opened up a lot more potential stories for the future, I get that it’s not my decision to make. But why couldn’t they actually make this make sense in the actual context of what we’d seen already? If you wanted to break them up because they’re in different places, then having Buck ask Tommy to move in could have caused more of an argument of Tommy saying that Buck doesn’t really see him and doesn’t seem to understand that Tommy has a whole life outside of Buck. O Tommy could have been the one to propose moving in together and Buck freaks out because it’s too soon—which leaves Tommy to come to the conclusion that they want different things right now and he can’t just sit around and hoping Buck will catch up because it would be too hard for him to let go of Buck later. Or have Tommy literally going to a different place—whether temporarily or permanently—and so they have to break up because Buck has a whole life here and Tommy wasn’t about to ask Buck to uproot himself for Tommy…
There’s so many other ways this breakup could have gone instead of the route they went—and they would have made much more sense contextually. Instead, they went this cheapest way possible and have Buck now acting like a child about calling Tommy, when in reality and with the growth we’d seen of Buck in the past 8 years, he would have reached out to Tommy already. At least to talk things through. The baking thing was cute for an episode and it would have been okay for longer, but I’m just sitting here wondering exactly why Buck can’t call Tommy… If it’s because he’s hurt, then they needed to say that because right now, it just seems like Buck is literally being forced to not call him but the audience isn’t really sure why.
All this brings me to my biggest point. Third: I don’t trust anything that’s being said in interviews or by TM because he doesn’t write in advance and that’s a major problem
Before we get into it let me make a disclaimer: I’m gonna need every single network and studio to start requiring all the white men who write for them to actually be getting them scripts. We cannot rely on their “genius” to make sense because these scripts—especially season 8—should have had a few more passes before what we’ve seen. The only episode so far that actually felt like a complete episode was the Halloween episode.
And if this season has taught us anything, it’s that Tim not having any real plans or anything written is actually a massive problem for this show.
Now me not believing TM is not me saying that I 100% believe Tommy is coming back (though I feel like the chances are higher now with the reaction from the GA for ABC to suggest some things or at least give a closure beat to this character and relationship) This is more, nothing that TM has said in interviews up until this point for season 8 has really actually happened on screen except for Eddie shaving his moustache… Granted, I don’t read every single article with him so I might have missed something, but I just feel like he’s got no interest in setting anything up and actually paying it off in any real way.
So many people were so excited for season 8 because it was the first season in years where we actually knew so many storylines going into 8—that weren’t told to us in interviews; they were introduced in the actual show! We had Bobby/Athena’s house hunting, HenRen fighting Ortiz and trying to get Mara back, Madney fostering Mara in HenRen’s place, Eddie dealing with Christopher leaving, and Gerrard back at the 118. Any one of those storylines would have been so amazing to really see explored and fleshed out. Instead, everything was basically settled and done by episode 4—apart from Christopher and Eddie resolution and Bobby/Athena actually moving in / building. To me, as a writer myself, that decision to rush though those other stories was a massive massive misstep. There was so much there to explore and delve into that could have been so satisfying to watch and really reap the emotional payoff.
Instead, we had like 2-4 minutes max of processing HenRen not being able to see Mara again before they were all reunited. Not that I wanted to see HenRen struggling again in this way, but it would have been different and they could have put some humor into it with Karen suggesting they tail Ortiz and try to find things out about her—or Hen comes back from a shift to find Karen has stayed up for 38 hours tracking every single facebook post from Ortiz and her family to try and find something they could use and she’s the one who uncovered the link between Ortiz and Gerrard, which then promts Hen to ask Buck as Gerrard’s specialist boy to ask for a favor or try to convince Gerrard to help them deal with Ortiz.
And Maddie and Chimney having Mara would have been so interesting to see them actually having conversations about what they want for their family going forward—do they want more kids, do they not? Are they wanting to try naturally or adoption? And then Mara being with Chimeny could have also added another layer of tension between Hen and Chimney with Hen being jealous that Chimney is raising her daughter.
I mean Eddie… the fact that it took 8 episodes (basically) for him to actually acknowledge that he needs to do something to be a part of his son’s life is a major problem as well. It makes me not want to root for Eddie to reconcile with Chris because he has shown hardly any initiative in actually confronting what he did and the actual reason why Chris is so upset and feels betrayed. There was a little in 6, but that’s sort of it.
Bobby and Athena, they just don’t seem to know what to do with them anymore. And that’s a shame because there are so many things they could do—namely my favorite thing which is give them more comedy to do! They are so funny together (cruise ship is one of my favorite things). Or they could have had the first few episodes be them sort of couch surfing through the firefam and be a fun little runner of “we really need to figure out what we’re doing.” Even their storyline of their house burning just doesn’t seem to be a thing anymore.
Buck, it would have been so amazing to see him dealing with the work stuff more and having Tommy to lean on, to see Buck who’s been pretty secure in his work for the past few seasons now dealing with Bobby being gone and Gerrard there, just really gets him thinking about the future. Or even the comment about budget cuts, why was that never brought up again? That would have been so interesting to lead up to the midseason finale, which of the 118 is going to get laid off? And Buck being in such a secure spot maybe he volunteers because he wants to explore something outside of firefighting and/or because everyone else has kids and a family and he knows it’s easier for him to not have a job? And then he’s saying his goodbyes and the midseason act out is Bobby announcing that Eddie is going to be leaving them instead.
Instead of really exploring any of that, it’s all been rushed through to move on to the next thing, but the honest truth is: I don’t trust what TM’s great next thing is because he absolutely squandered all the potential he had going into season 8. So all these “amazing things” he has going forward I just don’t trust they’re going to happen or even be slightly interesting. Instead, I assume they’re going to be something that’s like an episode opening and then never mentioned again if they do happen.
I just don’t understand what is going on in his head other than ego right now and I’m just… I deal with too many egos in my life to deal with another one like this.
#didn't expect this to end up as long as it is but i guess i had a lot to say and honestly still have a lot to say but mentally need a break#but this has just made me want to get back into actually writing and maybe writing my own version of season 8#one day I'll move on but it took me months to get over magicians and this is bringing those feelings back a bit#bucktommy#911 critical#911 season 8
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Im just gonna say it: the exact same argument about series 11 having a woman playing the Doctor but w/ inconsistent politic & fake activism applies to series 14 & a lil of RTD2 in general but in Black. Respectability politics & flimsy anti racism all over the shop
It thinks futuristic racism corrects racism "being a thing of the past" but then actively erases said racism of Britain's past. Twice. Not only that but it glorifies the 60s & regency period. Does "powerful" white supremacy commentary then slaps a regency wig on 15's head 😭
It should go without saying that 1960s & 1800s Britain wasnt some post racial utopia. The show would rather make these periods more progressive than they really were instead of telling the stories of the POC living there or hell, show us history outside of 'the West'
It treats the dehumanisation of Black people as an inevitable part of future society. Fifteen has to be a perfect non violent victim of racism but can fridge the goblin king & the chuldur easy. Racism can/must exist but fighting back or having any reaction to ur oppressor can't.
The gag is RTD understands racial oppression when it affects *him* tho. The oppression of the Welsh is acknowledged in present day Earth bc it's a real part of history. Its addressed again in 2046 bc it's still relevent in the future. & did Ruby save Roger? No she got him gone!
It sanitises its own history. The Doctor has called out racial supremacy, human or not since day. And no they didn't always save *everyone*. Against the establishment to begging it & partying with it too apparently. Rosa has issues but at least it was hopeful...
It treats Fifteen as a white character made Black which has weird implications for a non human being from a "post racial" society. Thirteen wasn't a "human woman" but she still had the agency to call out every misogynist she met. Lawd forbid she cried over Jack Robertson 😭
Despite having a Black Doctor they're written for a white audience. 'It's not about Black people, its about white people' sealed the deal. It treats their Blackness as circumstantial & not something they'll have to deal with regardless of time period playing it safe & palatable
This 1 should be self explanatory. If Donna's seen the Doctor's mind then she knows Fugitive Doctor exists so yes the Doctor comes in a range of different colours 🤪🤪 And again if he's not a human Black man but an alien then why is it a surprise that he can change race? Ugh...
Isaac Newton wasn't that deep bc he's only there for the mavity gag but it opened a fuck ton of racism towards Nathaniel Curtis & antiblackness bc the racists camping the tag thought he was Black. 'Owning the right 🤪' at the expense of POC in the show & fandom. Great job there..
RTD made the point of the Toymaker being racist then keeps him anyway? Takes a jab about cultural appropriation in Pyramids of Mars then based the finale on it anyway w/ Sutekh? Not even entertaining the Black Guardian ting. Like what's the point of any of this? It feels so fake.
Carla's not as egregious as the previous but apart from RTD copying & posting her name from Clyde's mum in SJA, she doesn't get a lot to do outside supporting Ruby's storyline. S14 then ends with Ruby calling her bio mum her "real" mum so her serving role didn't mean much anyway
The Giggle was the 1st flag bc it conflated all political related anger as bad bc it's anger instead of love 😫✊🏻without *single* look at why the current political climate is the way that it is. Pandemic, genocides, climate change & govt corruption yh ppl will be angry Russell 🥴
Series 11 at least gets to gas itself up for having women write for the 1st female Doctor and having Black and South Asian writers for the first time in the show's history (which isn't a great achievement but ah well)
Series 14 doesn't have that to its credit.
Black woman who only exists to boost white characters stories, racism stories that don't give their Black characters full agency & 0 follow up of their experiences only this time w/ no Black writers. Same tings different font. What improvement was made exactly?
Tl;Dr - We have the 1st Black Doctor in the main lineup but this series handles race and racism poorly. There's barely any improvement from how race was handled in RTD1 and his handling of Black characters in Years & Years and It's a Sin hasn't been brought over. 🥴
#doctor who#fandom racism#fandom antiblackness#antiblackness#racism#show analysis#doctor who analysis#rtd2 era#rtd2#rtd critical#anti rtd#rtd#chibnall era#performative activism#wild blue yonder#73 yards#the giggle#dot and bubble#rogue
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KINTYPE LIST!
over the past year, ive experimented with multiple labels and identities. this is to update yall on the creatures i feel connected to and identify as/with!
1. Red Fox
this is my strongest type, and is my main hearttype. i experience phantom limbs, specifically a tail, ears, fangs, muzzle, and being the size of a fox. i also experience the most species dysphoria in regards to my red fox kintype. this has been my longest-lasting identity as well! i own quite a bit of gear for this type, including a tail and multiple self-made masks. for me, red foxes teeter on the line between identifying *with* and identifying *as* one. so far, though, i do consider myself foxhearted! i experience longing for forests and fields, and a burrowed den. i also enjoy collecting and hoarding small items and food, similar to a fox. i specifically know that i have red fur, black paws and ear tips, and a white tail tip with green eyes.
2. Grey Fox
this is much more recent! a few days ago, i did a moodboard for someone regarding a grey fox, and i felt an instant connection. this is definitely a hearttype for me. something about looking at images of these critters makes me feel like im looking at family. grey foxes are most active at dusk and dawn, which i identify with strongly. grey foxes are unique in their ability for climbing trees, which i identify so strongly with! i love climbing up and just perching in a tree, watching people below me. it makes me feel safe and at-home. looking at this image feels like looking in a mirror, honestly. i believe that grey foxes are a strong hearttype for me, and may also dip into kintype territory!
3. Ocelot
again, this is very recent. i made a moodboard i believe just yesterday with these critters and something just clicked. i have experienced multiple feline shifts/behaviors, but i thought they were just cameo shifts. now i know that this is me!! ocelots are nocturnal, extremely territorial, and spend time in dense brush or trees-- all things that i identify with. ocelots mainly live in coastal marshes, mangrove forests, and tropical forests. i feel SO connected to this critter, it's absurd. this is definitely a kintype for me.
4. North American River Otter
our first linktype! i identify voluntarily as a river otter. ive always thought they were really cool and i feel a strong connection to creeks and rivers. i also exhibit multiple otter behaviors, some intentionally and some unintentionally. swimming is also quite euphoric for me! i don't feel entirely aquatic though, and i know i have paws and fur while in the water. this was my first linktype i chose! to me, this is a funlink.
5. Wild Rabbit
this is mostly behavior-based. i experience intense prey instincts, remain alert when outdoors, feel the need to burrow and make a safe place for myself, prefer to be solitary, make nests, and dig! i have quite a few rabbits in my neighborhood, and i feel a strong relation to them. im not quite sure what label fits my experience-- it's not intentional, but doesn't feel involuntary either. more like learned behaviors. i don't feel that i am a rabbit, but i am very much so like a rabbit. i dont identify with rabbits, but i do act and feel like one. it's strange! but burrowing and nesting makes me feel so euphoric :33 i believe this may be a form of copinglink, alongside a deeper involuntary identity.
6. Wolf
this is a copinglink/involuntary identity. again, it's behavior-based. this type feels the strongest whenever i am alone or with another person i care about, especially when in dangerous situations or areas. this is a very general wolf/canine type, as it's not specific to one kind or breed of canine. grey wolf seems to be the strongest, but i also feel shifts and identify as/with black wolves, coastal wolves, dobermans, german shepherds, and other canines! i believe this does partially stem from trauma, as i feel like a feral dog let free from confinement. however, i still identify on some integral level as a wolf, or as someone who was raised by/should have been one.
thats all for now! ill come back and edit this post whenever i see fit to add/remove information and kintypes ^^
#otherkin#alterhuman#otherkinity#alterhumanity#therian#therianthropy#therianthrope#otherheart#otherheartedness#otherhearted#otherlinked#otherlinker#otherlink#other link#copinglink#coping link#copinglinker#funlinker#funlink#fun link#kinpost#kinlist#otherkin list#alterhuman list#hearttype#hearttype list#linktype#linktype list#kintype#kintype list
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Right, here’s some more info!
Under the cut to keep it tidy.
There are five states that The Decider can be in, starting from the first formation of existing. As a player would go through a full run of the game, they would gain opportunities to metaphorically ‘poke’ The Decider into speaking, which would further their development into being something that exists.
The first event is the one that is necessary to start forming them. This is the most specific to achieve as the TPatD alt path is the only way that the voice can be formed. As stated before, the conversation can lead to The Princess, and what could become The Decider, to ponder the existence of them.
After this, the player can choose whatever routes and choices (that don’t avoid interacting with VotD) they desire.
The second time (and the rest up until the final fifth time) can seem like a regression. They’re just about as silent as when they were less than a possibility. At this stage most of the interactions are acknowledgment of Decider’s existence. The other voices will also have comments, mainly the Hero, as he’s always there, and the Skeptic, because of obvious reasons. Overall, their minuscule reactions generally follow the emotional state of the collective of TLQ, but mostly TLQ himself.
The third route is a pivotal point, as it is where VotD shows signs of cognizance. They speak in single words or simple sentences, and actually respond to being talked to, or the situation at hand. Here, they start to offer their own thoughts without prompting, even if simple. Nothing they say is too profound, though.
The fourth princess-vessel collection is a midpoint. It’s when The Decider develops more into someone rather than something. Though they still have their bouts of silence, they now actively participate in Voice Conversations. They tend to add on to any given statement by any voice (with some exception to The Opportunist), rather than have their own comments. They do have their own things to say sometimes, but most of it relates to them feeling like they’ve seen things before.
The fifth and final run is when they are fully formed. They function like any other voice, and have a more extensive vocabulary than before. Unlike Voice of the Hero and The Long Quiet, they remember past routes to some degree (Mostly the fourth run). At this point, VotD can offer a few additional solutions in some situations. Most would lead to a variation of an existing route, but they would offer a few totally new ones.
What happens to The Decider after five vessels are collected, depends on when The Decider is first collected, and how many runs they’ve been on since. If you’ve only collected them, or if you’ve collected them and only actualized them once, they will not have a strong enough identity to withstand the confrontation with The Shifting Mound, and will simply fade back into TLQ. If you interact with them two or more times, they will be able to survive the confrontation—given that you do not try to get rid of them yourself.
What they’re like in the confrontation depends on how many successful interactions you’ve had with The Voice of the Decider (which would be roughly once per death in a route, with exceptions to ones like The Razor) beyond the necessary TPatD route and the second route you chose. To put it simply, they’ll be however cognizant you’ve made them before the confrontation. This means they’re either grasping at the threads of sentience, a full, separate being, or somewhere in-between.
Now that I’ve explained how they come to be, I can talk about VotD themself! Though it will be in a separate post. Additionally, I have some more Original Voices, though since they work like one of the usual 11, I won’t put them under an AU. I could talk about them, if someone’s interested.
There’s been some big storms lately, so I haven’t gotten much done lately. However, I’ve decided (hah) on what the name of the AU I’m making!
Introducing:
The Voice of The Decider!
The Pristine Cut Spoilers below!
The Voice of the Decider is an AU where a 12th voice is created via an alt path in The Princess and The Dragon!
How is The Decider created on this alt path? What is this alt path?
Well, for starters, the path starts when the option ‘Cut her free on your own’ is chosen. However, when you are put back into the Princess, there is an option (perhaps quicktime, but maybe not) to make the first move before The Opportunist takes the opportunity to kill you.
This action causes You and the Princess to knock the knife out of Your original body’s hand, giving You a chance to escape.
Disregarding my divergent scenario of this alt path, You and The Princess make your escape out of the cabin. You’re taken into the abyss, and, before Shifting takes the new vessel, you have a chance at a conversation.
In this conversation, You and The Princess discuss your situation at hand. You talk about things such as The Voices, and Yourself. She asks about ‘You’ being named The Decider. It’s not something ‘You’ have ever considered, being a voice just like those others.
Something stirs, but, before you can discuss more, your connection is pulled away, painfully. You are subsumed back into your original body.
Might reblog later with more!
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I am actually. I am so emotional over the Salazar parents and I need to share this to tumblr too.
A lot of stories where the MC is adopted I feel. Either dismiss the biological parents and the impact they have on the kid's life, or makes them evil and abusive, framing the loss of the bio parents as a good thing, or at least something we shouldn't think about just look at this new family.
But Genrex doesn't do that. From the start, Rex wanted to find out more about his parents - it's one of his primary character motivations, next to helping people. He loves them, even though he doesn't know them.
And the more he finds out about them, the more he realizes they loved him. Rylander is consumed by guilt but as Rex's first connection to his pre-Event life, the first thing he does is hug him. And when he tells Rex about his parents, the two things Rex knows is that 1) they were scientists, and 2) that when he was in danger, they were desperate enough to use their secret, experimental technology to save him. Technology built from their desire to help the world, to save countless lives and end countless suffering.
And then. When he finds out that they were dead, he doesn't stop caring. It'd be so easy, too, to tie it up there - his parents were good people, he got his answer about them, the end. But they don't. He doesn't. Because the show is saying once again that they are his parents. He still calls them mom and dad, even as the show makes it clear Holiday and Six adopted Rex as their son. Even as the show even parallels Six and One with Rex and Six (and I will talk about that more later if I don't forget, trust me), to really drive home how much they're family. Rex even says he considers the two of them family, and later that he considers Noah, Claire and Annie family.
He has new family, the show tells us, but his old family still matters to him. He's upset that he never has the chance to meet his parents, that everything he hears about them, about his time with them, is secondhand knowledge. It tells us clearly that not only does Rex still love them, but that he still wants to know them. And everything we find out about them reinforces the love that they had for each other.
We see Abuela and the family in Mexico, who connect him to his birth family and tell him that he was so loved back then, and still is now. We see their office in Abysus through Rex's eyes. The picture of him and his dad on his desk. The drawing Rex drew, proudly pinned to the wall.
We see it in the familiarity of the drawing. That that robot, that build, was what Rex created when he was lost and scared and alone - that it was made to keep him safe. That it first appeared in his mind in a place he felt safe.
The show says, tenderly and softly, that the love is still there. That the fact these people died was nothing but a tragedy, that their love is a big part of what made Rex who he is today - that every molecule in his body is filled with their final gift to him. That every time he cures someone, every time he uses a build, every time he makes a machine - we see the love that they had for him.
And the way he quietly absorbs his father's face. The way he freezes and whispers "Mamá?" when he finds out Zag-Rs has their mother's voice. The fact that she even has her voice as a testament to Caesar's love, too - that it was meant to bring comfort and safety. The way Rex yells at Caesar when he finds out they have a family property, a connection to their past, the way he fights to protect it.
And, none of this takes away still from Six and Holiday being Rex's family too. None of this removes the work either set of parents did for him, the love either set has - the show says that it was unfair that the Salazar parents were lost. That Six and Holiday are not replacements, that they still love him as parents but play different roles in his life. They can not, and have no desire to, replace the Salazars. But Rex needs parents, he needs protectors, and so they will do what they can for him - at first out of necessity, to keep this kid they barely know safe, but then out of love. They aren't replacing what was lost, but are doing their best to do what Rex's bio parents would do. And they do mess up in it - they mess up in ways Rex's bio parents might not have. Six is clearly bad with showing affection, affection we saw the Salazars give Rex so easily, and Holiday is overworked and stressed constantly, sometimes breaking under the pressure and snapping at Rex and Six, things we never saw the Salazars do.
It's just. It's about how sometimes things will not be the same. They will be different. That doesn't mean the people you lost aren't still with you.
#This is also. Why I dislike the 'Rex was secretly made for the nanite experiments the accident was a lie' theory so much#Bc it assigns malice where the show says over and over again there was only love.#That this was only ever a tragedy of good people whose good intentions were manipulated and twisted.#And I think giving them something shitty to have done in the past especially goes against the message of the show's perspective on adoption#The family we choose is not always stronger than the family we are born to. Sometimes they are equal in different ways.#Rex's bio parents are gone but not replaced. They have also shaped who he is#Six and Holiday are just picking up where they left off. Because they have to.#Also I don't like the theory that Rex's parents are EVOs somewhere bc I think it diminishes the impact of the tragedy too.#I get. Wanting them to have a happy ending. But I think it's important to realize that this is the closest they can have to a happy ending.#Some things cannot be replaced. Or fixed. Sometimes life takes what we love and what loves us. And that is okay.#It is okay to be upset at that and it is okay to never fully move on.#'What about Caesar?' I have. Another post's worth of thoughts about him.#But I think he's also a character who is defined more by Rex by their relation and defined by the story by his guilt#I think he is the closest thing Rex has to a shitty bio family member and he is shitty in plenty of ways#But he's also a parallel to Rex in a lot of ways. He fails where Rex succeeds bc of it.#generator rex#genrex#Anyways. Sorry for the big post.
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I know this is a very unoriginal observation (much like any other), but I'm finally reading The Great Gatsby, and even I wouldn't describe men the way Nick does.
#queer#lgbt#lgbtq#i did watch the 2013 film for my ap english class though (i think they didn't have enough time left for us to actually read it)#like the way he described tom was very. superfluous in my opinion. something you want to tell the class NICK (joking)#i find myself really partial to the general writing styles of that time though#i haven't even gotten that far in the book either i'm just barely past the part where daisy is introduced#so nick is just waffling about his family history and how he rents for $80/month#which is relatable when you consider inflation. nick i hope you eat you landlord#i can see why people don't like this writing but i am endlessly fascinated by the prose#maybe i should just free myself from the impulse to hide behind layers of self-censorship and live like nick does#tbh tho i still prefer non-fiction and textbooks BUT fiction is valuable and is useful#fiction is like play - it lets you explore different possibilities and thought in a safe environment
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i have officially returned. ask me anything.
#random thoughts#i'll probably answer it tomorrow because i'm tired. i don't know why.#ciel if you see this i've been nicer to myself these past few days following your birthday. taking care of myself in general aspects.#which i sort of hate myself for but it's okay because. uh. i won't be like this forever. i'll be better at what i'm trying to do i promise.#new year's resolution is not fucking with me.........#oh also!! i've been sort of feeling like a dead person at times. and also like a cockroach. i have had to repeatedly tell myself that#i'm not dead i'm not dead!!!!#because i'm not. obviously. and i know i'm not. my brain is just silly. it likes to tell me i am things i am not like book characters.#and recently my mother got me my own rosary and we've been practicing praying together with my brother.#can you imagine how bad it must be for me to turn to christianity as a coping mechanism? not even when i was terrorized with death thoughts#not even in august for fuck's sake.#but it's actually not that bad. though i think i like the idea of organized religion more than i like being a part of it.#also i feel like my being catholic (mostly non-practicing) is betraying the queer community somehow. like. queer people have suffered#so much because of the christian church in general. so it's like. being christian is weird when i'm also queer.#but also then i feel weird when i try to do things in relation to christianity. like. put saint in my artist name.#that feels blasphemous i don't know. is it?????? it's not that serious either way but. augh.#i am going to write a song about this. also fellow christians is it okay to use the lyric 'uselessly clutching her rosary' or is that bad?#because i mean. technically. the she i'm referring to sort of is. because god isn't solving any of our problems.#he's just fucking. watching. if he's even real.#(and no my disappearance isn't related to the catholicism thing it's something else. as in the one thing i haven't told anyone else but cie#and an irl friend. if you are ciel then i am completely open to talking about said thing.#otherwise i will continue to drop cryptic little notes on my blog because I AM SILLY. {: )#going to play roblox now and maybe say hello to you fuckers on discord for a bit of fun. goodbye.
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This got away from me a little bit because I saw archetrope and got excited to talk about it. The proportion of importance this has to my life/identity to the recognition from the wider alterhuman community of this label is... low
I think of it as its own thing, but it doesn't mean that an archetrope identity can't also be an otherkin one at the same time or have overlaps, especially if someone identifies as an inherently nonhuman archetype, right?
IMO it usually comes down entirely to the individual's internal self-perception, the way they think of the 'type and what it is to them to "be" that. To use your example, I guess the death conceptkin might be more drawn to a 'kin label because on some level they feel as if their species identity is Death, whereas the death archetrope feels like they embody the archetype of death as it appears in culture or fiction, regardless of their own species—any animal can die, right? Perhaps a death archetrope is also a rat therian and relates the most to Death of Rats from Discworld :P
I guess someone could be an archetrope because they feel they had a past life as a knight, but I don't really think know if it can be a "past life thing," because either way, a knight archetrope would be someone who identifies as a knight NOW in some way, and finds ways that their life reflects this. When I say I am a wanderer archetrope, it is not a character; I just am a wanderer, which makes me an archetrope, not the other way around, so I guess the guy I'm identifying as is "me" or even "me, but happy" lmao. But again if the person in question doesn't see that distinction for their own archetype and also considers it a sort of fictotype, who am I to say "that's not how it's done"
Idk what's meant by character tropes exactly but I have a general idea and I do think by identifying as a time loop archetrope someone would be implying at the very least that they consider the time loop in fiction to be a conscious, decision-making agent in the story. Which isn't entirely WRONG but I guess is subjective. Fantasy aside, I don't think it's just "anything that would be found in a story," because most things would
If it is for you, it is, like I said but I do NOT think you can have memories of your archetype, I think those would just be past life memories, because your archetype is something that you are now, not really its own being. So even if those feelings are due to a past life, it would probably be more like a theme that has followed you, not something like still feeling mentally a [species/concept/etc.] because in a past life your soul was in a body of that shape. As for shifts I've never heard anyone say so before and I certainly never have, unless you'd count wanting to do something affirming and then doing it or feeling frustrated if I can't. I never feel more or less like a wanderer. I'm just a wanderer because I tend to do that, usually very literally, and the label follows that reality. Not to say all archetropes live up to their archetype constantly or you have to to be one but the general idea is that that lifestyle is how you see yourself.
YES and YES. Oh my g-d do I. I'd kind of always like to be doing things that make me euphoric as my archetype long-term and if I couldn't even be convinced to stay in the same geographic region for over 3 years then I don't know who still thinks that I can be convinced to stay in the house when I could be in the woods or park or river and haven't been chained down yet. But like... it's not quite the same feeling as species dysphoria? Species dysphoria, and gender dysphoria is kind of the same way, comes from not being seen the way I know that I am. Gender dysphoria was being told "you don't do that, you are a woman." Species dysphoria is being told "you don't do that, you are a human." No one who knows me for more than a day would say "yeah, you're a real homebody huh? You never seem to change or move around a lot. You don't do that, you aren't exactly a wanderer at heart!" Archetype dysphoria doesn't usually come from other people's perceptions or judgments, not in a way that (for me at least) can't be instantly confirmed inaccurate in less than a conversation. Even people who'd still call me a woman 4 years on T wouldn't pretend I haven't lived in like 4 places in 3 years and seem physically incapable of just standing still somewhere. That feels good, but it also feels 100x worse when I do have to stand still than not being seen as a bird in everyday life does.
ive been reading about archetropes lately, mainly because its an interesting identity and also because im questioning being one myself. so, i have some questions for the community if thats okay!
does archetropy fall under the otherkin umbrella? or is it just alterhumanity?
what is the difference between archetropes and conceptkin? why is, for example, being the concept of death conceptkin, but being the character trope "Death" archetrope?
is there a difference between being an archetrope and being OCkin (or even being fictionkin)? if you are, for example, an archetrope of "the Knight" does that mean youre a specific knight? (i only ask this because ive seen one being in the archetrope tags making a moodboard of their life as a knight)
are archetropes only for character tropes? like can you just be the trope of "Time Loop" or do you have to be a character that is trapped in a time loop? and if you can, what would be the difference to just being time loop kin?
is being an archetrope connected to past lives? can you have memories of being your archetrope type? can you have shifts (mental or otherwise)?
how does being an archetrope affect you on your daily life? do you do things that make you euphoric as your type? can you have dysphoria for not acting like your type?
you dont have to answer to all these to respond! if you dont know or dont want to answer a question feel free to skip it /gen. thank you!
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heeheehee
#this was inspired by#a moment in cater’s#halloween story I think?#where he is telling lilia and Kalim about having to move around a lot and he never formed permanent connections because of it#and lilia says something along the lines of ‘I can relate’#and I don’t remember how cater responded but later while watching lilia interact with diasomnia and call them his family he thinks lilia is#a hypocrite and that he could never understand how cater feels#and in general just feels pretty bitter towards lilia#and I think that’s one of his defining character moments for me#an i just think it’s funny lol#plus it’s not like this is something cater would actually post because than people would see past his carefully constructed persona#and I do think that he genuinely wants other people to be happy and likes other people#but also#I just feel like he holds a lot of resentment in his heart#for people getting things he envies and not seeing through his facade enough to help him#despite doing nothing to reduce said facade…#anyways this is a lot of character thoughts for what was supposed to be a funny meme redraw#twst#twisted wonderland#cater diamond#my art#meme redraw
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I love writers I love when they ramble on abt characters and their motivations, their core values and the reasons why they react to things in certain ways and having character interactions work off of each other due to their differing ways of viewing the world and in general I just love character analysis
#as someone who loves humans and human behaviours and figuring out why people react to things the ways that they do#uhhh I'm actually surprisingly really bad @ writing characters with those same traits 😅#unless it is smth I can connect to on some sort of level like a few of my characters have issues that I specifically relate to#thereforee I can understand the ways they act in certain circumstances#BUT when it comes to characters that are like almost entirely outside of my wavelength it's pretty hard for me to understand how they work#and it's pretty basic habits and behaviours I just fuckin lack them in general#like the concept of clinginess or abandoment issues or wanting to stay around people who treat you badly or jealousy or missing people#also love like I understand my type of love but my type of love isn't typical from what I've seen from others#even some of my own past issues like dealing with trauma have kinda been lost on me especially bcuz I'm the type to ignore stuff#like I just ignored it til it came back to bite me in the ass and had to just kinda struggle with it and go completely numb#until I got tired of feeling that way and pulled myself outta it step by step and my various negative ways of thinking elude me#since I just gradually built myself up and rearranged my brain so that all negative thinking eventually turns into dust#whether be positive or purely neutral until I'm able to handle it better#REGARDLESS I try to get a sense of what these other traits are like and how exactly they work for people but it is VERY difficult for me#bcuz the stuff is just such an alien emotion to me like people get REALLY emotional about things that simply aren't a problem for me#and I wish I could understand why and what goes on in the brain that causes that but my brain just doesn't work that way#SOOO me trying to make characters of typical issues I see people having DOESN'T really work when I have no idea what's going on#like IN GENERAL my characters need to have more emotion behind them but the emotions I need them to have are#like I said before. something I totally lack ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ so I have no idea how to do it#I mean I think I need like a check list I need to make a list of traits my characters have in general cuz I never write anything down#it'd be easier to figure it out if I had words to go along with it and then I could figure out the behaviours behind those words#plus I need to draw my characters cuz I'm very much a visual person I can't get as good of a feel without some visuals along with it
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Actual photo of me attempting to piece together all the new info and lore from totk with what we learned in botw with the rest of the franchise's lore and my own headcanons so I can RP a character I've been building for 10+ years, circa 2023:
#ooc tag tbd#this will forever be one of my hangups with these two games in general#its like they want to start over and do something related but different#in like an au or something#but they keep putting in these concrete nuggets of info that indisputably link these events to ones from the other games#without really linking them to anything going on in this era with anything real solid#that we're just left hanging with this thing that feels completely COMPLETELY separate but also not#and its very frustrating#like i like what theyre doing#but i wish they would pick a side#either do something new#or do like the other games did in the past#where they might not be direct sequels but the threads linking(heh) them still make them feel solidly related#and they obvs didnt do this perfectly but#anyway rambling
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Hate being forgetful actually
#got a good concise title for my topic and managed to procrastinate writing it down and FORGOT#you know what. first-generation immigrants' struggle with identity will do. it feels like i'm missing a modifier but it will do#as long as i have something to present it doesn't matter i don't care if i pass anymore i just don't want him to yell at me again bc i#have been such a crybaby these past few weeks i have been crying on and off for the last five hours and if he so much as raises his voice#at me tomorrow i will probably break down and that will be so fucking embarrassing#i don't wanna cry in front of others least of all in front of a prof#esp so bc i've seen people break down into tears in front of him before and he gets so grossly gentle and apologetic and does his best to#comfort them and well !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not a fan of being comforted by most people especially by those i don't feel close to#and on the spectrum of closeness people in authority are on the far end of ''you are not my friend'' you can address me with the formal you#all you want but i know what the hierarchy looks like and i won't be caught dead accepting close relations to authority figures
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Not Muu waking up and deciding upon himself that he may very become not so tiny Ten's partner in crime to do away with Little Lyric. First giving him secondhand snacks, and second for an even greater misstep than that.
"Hey. That's my.. big brother.."
#; ♡ ; crack#There is also something very distinguishing of muu in relation to other people#as ofc most people are capable of acknowledging when someone is deemed Physically Attractive#muu on the other hand really doesn't have that accept for what would be his version of 2D people funny enough#Prior to developing attraction by spending quality time with people and LATER LATER finding a desire for romance#he lowkey be putting people in categories based on dynamics he had in the past#or really of just can this person care for me in general or do I believe I can make them do so#just as I've tried and absolutely failed at those strategies as well by past attempts
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GENUINELY so funny AraSawa occurred to you too for the hanahaki tags, but thinking about it, I appreciate both scenarios for different (but related?) reasons.
Because I've personally always found the base concept of hanahaki aesthetically immaculate, but impossible to relate to or take seriously. They don't love you back Specifically In A Romantic Sense so your options are either to DIE or have a surgeon come in and delete love.exe? Lol. Lmao even. Couldn't be me. Of course, to each their own, but sort of like what you were saying with Aoki and Yumeno, it's just not something I'm ever going to "get."
With MineDai, something I love about the canon dynamic is that I really don't get the impression Mine's even pressed about Daigo loving him back. Of course, there's a degree of "pining" as shown in his first character story, but it's also immediately subverted in that what Mine was pining for is a simple workplace friendship that would be more reflective of their status as oath brothers in his eyes. Like, fair enough, all things considered, right?
And in spite of the arguments that could be made here, I honestly do believe him overall when he says his love for Daigo is selfless and without ulterior motives. Even with his desire for friendship, it's super important to me that he resolved to never impose that upon Daigo unless it was what Daigo wanted. That's why Daigo had to be the one to initiate their friendship instead.
It's just refreshing, because often the execution of these types of concepts feel sort of adjacent to incel rhetoric in forcing two people together inorganically to lessen the "suffering" of one. Especially with the life-or-death nature of hanahaki played-straight pushing it to an extreme, and especially with the enormous backlog of fan-content where Mine is primarily only concerned with his own desires. But for Mine, because it doesn't cause him Suffering to not be loved back romantically (at least as far as he knows), "the problem of hanahaki" would not about The Pain of Unrequited Love, but a physical manifestation of extant problems.
It'd be about obliviousness, it'd be about miscommunication, it'd be about saying he's fine when he's not, it'd be about how the emotional barriers he puts up only serve to hurt him when his needs are unmet (kind of what we were talking about RE: Katase and past relationships; super excited to dig in and reply btw, I'm just rushing the Yokoyama clip for tomorrow), it'd be about workaholism and the need to overachieve in order to feel accomplished, loved, and wanted, and how all of that might intersect with physical illness.
That I can relate to and take seriously, because ignoring symptoms and keeping them to yourself so as to not inconvenience others really can kill you. Your crush not liking you back? Uh, not so much. But it's certainly not all gloom and doom either, because all of those things can be as comedic as they are tragic. So I think the Short, Sweet and Funny approach would be perfect.
And with AraSawa, it's kind of Just Works, right, precisely because it's another thing for Jo to endure in silence and make excuses for. "Just pretend it didn't happen. Brush it under the rug. That's what you do with secrets." It's so good as a representation of guilt and secrecy. And this is pretty much rehashing something my friend said (not about these two specifically) but if he just came clean, it might stop, but instead he continues to hurt both of them. The flavor.
In the case of Hanahaki for Mine and Jo, I do think and agree it would more be a matter not of their 'beloved' not liking them back, but just the fact they themselves either refuse to openly acknowledge the feeling, or don't try to confront the feeling and do something about it. It's more so an issue of themselves being so focused on being useful and overworking themselves that they give themselves sickness (that sickness spurring from that unspoken of love and the inability to express it because they don't know how to and whatnot)
Maybe it's just because I generally try to see things silly and funny, but yeah I dunno: letting your own overthinking or not wanting to be a disturbance just feels better than what's traditionally done with Hanahaki
#long post#snap chats#oh lord i was gona say something but i forgot OOPS#timing so funny i was just about to make a goofy arasawa post LMAO#BUT YEAH NO thats generally something i squint a bit with minedai too#im sure ive done it in the past as i was getting used to their characters and their dynamic#but mine really isn't like. super pushy. he's persistent but not without a basis yeah#like when daigo extends his kindness to him THEN he has the greenlight to dedicate himself#BUT i also dont think mine wants to inflict harm on daigo or inconvenience him#yk. while he's conscious of course. when he's comatose that's a lil different and then the mental illness takes over#OH I REMEMBER like mine really does seem as though he would just be content even with daigos friendship#anything beyond that's just like. an unimaginable bonus yk#but yeah. hanahaki where the problem isn't that they don't love X back but they're just so shut off not only has the potential to be funny#but it's just more interesting and more appealing since it's a more relatable feeling#even beyond just romantic feelings right. like i can think of a lot of times where i shut myself off from other people#or i just felt like i couldnt open up to other people not because of anything they did but just because of Myself and My feelings#and that's a lot more painful (or at least more understandable to me) than someone not liking me back#and that's not even jumping to jo's scenario where it does tie back to his tendency to run from problems#(despite his instance he's different now amirite) like it just ties of perfectly for these two#i dont really look into aus or tropes because like. my brain is very small so i just forget or dont relaly tihnk about it#but yaya hanahaki can be very funny/interesting in regards to these blokes#now i have a post to make. i'm excited to see your yokoyama post when you get to uploading it!
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