#or it is odysseus' anxiety and hope to finally find a way home | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

hearteyes-candyskies · 4 years ago

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Odysseus

yandere shouto x reader, background shinsou x reader

summary; im a lil too obsessed with greek myth and purple prose and shouto’s too obsessed with u. peep the title if u still dont know what this is abt

tw; blood, death

word count; 2.6k

the cast

of course, we have our brave and guileful hero, Todoroki Shouto, as Odysseus himself, Nobody, King of Ithaca, and Son of Laertes. you play the role of sweet Penelope, Helen’s pretty mortal cousin. brash Antinous is portrayed by Yoarashi Inasa. and Shinsou Hitoshi is our silver-tongued Eurymachus

the first glance

Shouto first comes for the hand of your demi-god cousin, Helen, who is said to rival Aphrodite in beauty. you don’t like this farce your uncle puts on, summoning men from all over Greece to compete for Helen’s hand in marriage; she is still a child, only 16, and with no say in her future. still, you think, rather guiltily, better her than you. you do your best to avoid the suitors who come in hope of Helen’s hand, lest the see you and decide that they would like a consolation prize. downward gazes, veiled hair, and thick, draping robes all help to deflect attention, and you mange to pass unnoticed for the first couple weeks. all of this changes when he arrives. it’s said that nothing escapes his watchful gaze, and when his icy eyes sweep over you, you can feel yourself freeze as you pull your shawl just a little closer. he pauses for a fraction of a second, and yet you are unimaginably relieved when he moves on to inspect the crowd of nobles gathered in the corner

the pursuit

that night, you appear only as needed for the festivities before hurrying off to your rooms to weave. you’re rushing through one of the more abandoned hallways, preferring to walk a little extra rather than run into a drunk man, and when you turn the corner, room in view, Shouto stops you. maybe stop is too vague of a word; rather, he cages you in, not only with a casual hand against the wall, but also societal niceties. you desperately want to push him away, run for the refuge of your room, but to do so would be to slight all of Ithaca and bring his wrath down on your father. Shouto knows this, too. he tries to woo you first, honeyed words and a silver tongue, but you’re the daughter of a king. you’re used to gold. he tells you that the minute he saw you hiding away in the corners of shadows that his heart would beat for no other, and that he had to have you no matter what it took.

‘such a delicate thing, whose humble beauty is overshadowed by your cousin’s,’ he says. it doesn’t escape your notice how docile he makes you out to be, and while you were raised to be demure and refined lady, if Shouto really thinks you’re going to sit back and let him take you away, he’s wrong. he seems to sense the little fire of rebellion deep within you, but rather than putting him off, it only stokes his desire. lust flares in his eyes, and from that moment onward you know that you’ve trapped yourself in an obsessive relationship

the snare

Shouto leaves Tyndareus’ house with an alliance of the Greek city states and your hand in marriage. his quick wit and silver tongue allows him to secure the visiting nobles into a united agreement; Tyndareus will choose a husband for Helen, and all other men must leave without quarrel, and come when called upon. in return, Tyndareus will support Shouto in his pursuit of you. you know who the man is before your uncle even speaks, for in your agreement to marry Shouto, you asked that he might provide a kind and worthy man as Helen’s spouse. once again Helen lords over your life, but you cannot find it within yourself to hate her for it. after all, she is but a mere child, still too young to understand that her beauty is not really hers, that her life will always be in the hands of other men. still, one could argue that you are but a child, too. the ceremony is beautiful; you wear a dress of the finest fabric, a material softer and finer and lighter than any sort of linen you have ever encountered but one that Shouto assures you is worth it’s weight in gold. if he thinks to buy your love with material goods, you’ll allow yourself to be spoiled but you will never part with your affection willingly. at least, that’s what you think. Shouto has other plans

the early years

even from the beginning Shouto’s love is overbearing and extreme, but he’s a powerful king who treats you well and kept your cousin safe so there’s not much you can complain about. you’re just barely out of childhood, children who have been burdened with great power and yet the love and devotion he looks at you with is unparalleled. you have a feeling that he would fight even the gods to keep you. he’s kind and considerate; for the first two years of marriage he neither beds you nor tries do, despite the pressure he must feel to produce an heir and the weight of your family’s expectations. these gifts, these personal liberties he allows you to have, the way he lets you roam the island at your own leisure, this is why you fall in love with him. it’s odd; you never thought you would love the stoic king of Ithaca, but it seems that Aphrodite has other plans for you. on your twentieth birthday, you welcome him into your bed for the first time, and less than a month later, you discover that you are with child. it’s the next turning point in your marriage

the worse years

after the birth of Telemachus, Shouto’s love changes once again. once forgiving and relaxed about your interactions with others, he seeks to hide you away for only himself to see. the worst is when men approach you. it does not matter what their intentions are, nor their age nor stature nor standing; Shouto claims that his heart beats only for you, and thus yours should beat only for him. his demands to know where you’ve been and who you’ve talked to become more and more intense, until the island loses it’s queen. you are a prisoner in your own home, with Shouto smothering you in love, spending the whole of his day just lounging with you while he addresses kingly matters. bitterly, you think how you have never had any power to your name, not the way that men do and not the way that Shouto does. your rooms are nothing but a gilded cage, and you are almost glad when he is summoned for war. almost. after all, you do love the soft, kind boy that he once was

the war

throughout the war, you hear of your husband’s exploits. his bravery, his cunning, his skill. whenever you do not hear about him, your heart aches in fear, though you do not know if you wish him alive or dead. a year after the way has ended, when Helen has been reunited with Menelaus again, when Agamemnon is dead and Cassandra gone, when Aeneas has set sail for New Iliium, not yet Rome, the suitors come trickling in. at first, you do not know what to do, for festivities and mean both ceased to exist within the palace walls after the birth of your son. two catch your eye, bold Antinous, known as Inasa, sweet beyond his brash exterior, and sly Eurymachus, whose wit you see in your husband and whose charm is only his own. by the end of the second year after the fall of Troy, it is obvious who your heart beats for. the sight of purple sets your heart alight, and his small smiles are as sweet as the finest honey. you wonder if this is how Odysseus felt when he first saw you.

‘call me Hitoshi’, he says, and the way it rolls off your tongue is a sign that this love was meant to be. he asks for your hand in marriage three times. each time a flash of red and white causes your throat clog with fear, and though you know that you deny him out of protection, it makes the tears no less painful. even the loss of your husband cannot set you free

the reprieve

after Hitoshi’s third proposal, you set about weaving a shroud for your vanished lover. each day you weave ten rows, and each night you unravel five more. the sun-drenched days you spend with your violet-haired lover only fuel a blazing passion within you, but when he is gone, when you are alone in a cold room meant for two, the icy gaze of your husband haunts you, and you cannot help but delay the inevitable once more. you will bury your love, one day. you just cannot find the courage now. in the end of the fifth year after the fall of Troy, you finish the shroud.

Hitoshi is too respectful to rejoice, but you can see the relief in his eyes that you have finally put the memory of your husband to rest. plans are made, friends contacted, and suitors long vacated return to your halls in preparation of a beautiful wedding. the palace swells with life once more, the boisterous laughter of the men filling the halls and driving away the cold of the night. when night falls, you rest your head against Hitoshi’s chest, his arm slung carelessly across your shoulders, and you listen to the steady sound of his heartbeat, and rejoice in the constancy of his love.

where Shouto is the sun, bright and brilliant and life giving, but prone to flares of temper and burning those his affections focus on, Hitoshi is the moon; silver-tongued and soft, reflecting the radiance of others and giving the world a gentle glow. yet, despite your happiness, despite the love and life that is promised, you cannot help but feel a pit of worry in your gut

the unraveling

not more than a week after the former suitors’ arrival, your anxieties are confirmed in the form of a beggar. he is naught but an old man, merely claiming to know of the great king Odysseus, yet you cannot help but lean away from Hitoshi, your lover, and sit as if unhappy with the festivities. something about your mysterious visitor doesn’t sit right with you, and when he proclaims that Odysseus has escaped death, you know why. Inasa laughs, the scent of wine and honey heavy on his breath, and declares Odysseus dead.

‘his wife has burned the shroud she wove, not more than a month ago. dead men do not return five years after their fall.’ you want nothing more than to silence him, fear brewing in your stomach, and you are too busy giving panicked glances to your dear friend to notice how the stranger’s eyes train on you alone. a curt nod affirms Inasa’s statement, and your voice is steady when you answer.

‘less than a moon ago I laid the memory of my husband to rest. it has been ten long years, five years too long for a living man to return.’ you say this, and yet, you cannot wonder if this is a test . who is this man who claims to know of your husband, whose eyes burn like ice against your skin? you have to know, and perhaps it is your curiosity that causes your downfall

the slaughter

when the guests wake the next day, you propose a challenge. it’s selfish of you, borne out of a need for reassurance, a need to know that your husband truly is dead and that your love lives and will remain living. the great bow of Odysseus, only to be strung and shot by the man himself, is brought out, and forty axes are planted in the great hall.

‘this bow was my husbands, may his soul rest in Hades, and it was said that only he could wield it. who among you will try?’ man after man step up, failing good naturedly and patting Hitoshi on the back when he too does the same. you don’t mind his inability to wield the bow; in fact, it comforts you that your husband has been laid to rest, that his memory will not live on even in his weapons. then, the beggar from last night comes forward, and though you know that the decrepit body of his will be unable to sustain the force needed to even string the bow, fear runs thick in your blood. it is like you have been struck by Zeus, watching as the stranger strings the bow with ease, before launching an arrow straight through the great axes in the hall. your husband stands, and shakes off the illusion like a fur coat.

‘my love’ is all he says, and before you can react there’s an arrow buried in Agelaus’ heart and an expression of horror burned into his face. he orders you to the bedroom, your shared bedroom, but you stand still in shock, unable to move as he slaughters the men you have called friends in the very place you once called a prison. soon, far too quickly, there is none left save for brave Inasa and your lover Hitoshi. the look of disgust on your husband’s face as he rounds on Inasa, sword drawn, is unimaginable.

‘you come into my house, flaunt the rules of xenia, court my wife, and desire mercy? you will have no justice except for the bite of my blade.’ Inasa dies inelegantly, loud voice lost in a fountain of blood pouring from his throat. as Shouto stalks towards Hitoshi, it as all you can do to throw yourself around your lover, despite your please, Hitoshi steps out from behind you, hands placating and silver tongue spilling words of peace and goodwill. you want to tell him that silver tongues fail against tongues of gold, but it is too late and in the end all you can do is hold your love as the life bleeds from his eyes, forgiving and gentle to the very end

the ruins

the hem of your fine silk dress is soaked in blood when Shouto pulls you into his embrace, and you call brokenly for the servants to keep your son from seeing the carnage. he should never have to know the monster that his father is. as you look into his face, worn by the horrors of war and lined by time, you cannot help but hope that this is not your husband who has just perpetuated such a crime, that the soft red and white haired boy you once knew is dead, and a god holds you in their arms instead.

it’s a desperate, last ditch attempt to save the face of a man who once brought the life of Ithaca to you, and when you ask him to prove that he is Odysseus, that he is Shouto, your husband, you hope that he cannot speak anything but lies and half truths. he asks what you would want to hear from him, and you tell him that you have tired of sleeping alone and would like him to move to the bed in your bridal chamber, as only Odysseus himself would be able to lift it.

Shouto smiles, the years slipping off his face, and for a second you’re staring into the eyes of a man who helped your cousin, a man who waited two years to even touch you because he wanted to respect your decision to love him at your own pace, the man who gave you your greatest joy, Telemachus. he strokes your hair, love clouding his beautiful eyes, and tells you that it cannot be done, for he built the bed himself around a living olive tree. your heart sinks in disappointment, and you know that no divinity stands before you, only a god of a man. as you fall into his arms and sob, he holds you close, arms just a little too tight as he whispers soft comforts in your ear.

‘I am home, my love, and you have been here, waiting faithfully for me’

#yandere shouto x reader #yandere #tw: blood #tw: death

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okimargarvez · 6 years ago

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HEAVY EYES AND WOOLY GLOVES

Original title: Heavy eyes and wooly gloves.

Prompt: Penelope knits.

Warning: none.

Genre: romantic, soft, fluff.

Characters: Penelope Garcia, Luke Alvez.

Pairing: Garvez.

Note: oneshot, part 32 of 365 Garvez canon Life.

Legend: 💑😘🐶.

Song mentioned: none.

GARVEZ STORIES

HEAVY EYES AND WOOLY GLOVES

Penelope Garcia loves Luke with every part of herself; with all her heart, soul, body; it's a crazy, overwhelming and often exaggerated love. And despite this, someone could not believe her if she said that there are more than one things that bother her. Or at least, so it was at the beginning of their relationship. By now, she realizes how lonely she feels when he is far away, on the jet, already theoretically safe, in the direction of Quantico... now she loves even the one thing that once it drove her crazy, and she doesn't know if this is necessarily a good, or perhaps a bad thing, how much this has changed her without even noticing it.

And to these conclusions comes especially while she is intent in a particular activity, a hobby that, with all the bad things that had happened, since Morgan had left, she had set aside, but that she rediscovers just when she starts to attend Alvez home... before it also becomes her permanent home.

Hands that move skillful, making literally dancing knitting needles, advancing, slowly, with the passing of the months, eating threads of cloth and producing something that still appears shapeless, but soon begins to realize the final goal. And the choice, after all, was obvious, almost easier than not to accept going to live together.

Gloves. A pair of wooly gloves. In honor of the time when she had decided to mint a new nickname, which he hadn't forgotten afterwards. Rather. Even after more than a year of relationship, when happens that she shivers under his precise touch, he teases her, asking her if her hands aren't too cold. But they aren't at all, almost never.

The whole body of the Latin is a wood-burning oven, it's her personal stove, her water heater and curl up against his body, especially now that the temperature has dropped, that the sky begins to predict the first snowflakes, is among the most beautiful things that exist in the earthly world. Luke's hands are like fire, and when they touch her, they turn her body into wax.

But any source of heat needs to be cured, preserved.

Here then is the brilliant idea.

The choice of color was equally obvious. Red. But making a simple pair of plain-colored gloves would be too easy, for this she adds a white writing, a phrase, a nickname, definitely challenging to embroider.

Cool hand Luke.

And as she goes on with her work, the closer she gets to the end, the more she can imagine his expression when he will see them for the first time, when he will read those words. But especially when he will realize that those gloves aren't just gloves, because in that case she could have made him a scarf, or a cap, why not some pretty socks? Or worse, a sweater. No, all the worries, the anxieties, the desire to hear the phone ring and then his voice warning her that he's parking... and so on, quickly hide her work. And not being able to mention anything, keep a secret, right her, the one who was so teased for this thing.

But above all because when her mind focuses on cross-stitching, time seems to run faster.

So much so that she feels a bit sad, when she realizes that she has finished her work, not to be able to add anything, except to emulate the patient Greek wife of Odysseus, undoing her canvas to continue her play.

Instead, she decides it's time to share the result with him. And she starts counting the hours, minutes, seconds that separate her from the moment of truth. Since there is a possibility that she has hardly considered, in all these blank nights, to knit.

What if he did not like it?

Penelope knows rationally that it's basically just a pair of gloves... but also something more. That's why her heart beats when she sees out of the window his... their car; while she watching him park. While she hears the usually comforting sound of his footsteps along the stairs. Finally, that of the key in the lock. And the door opens wide.

She lets Roxy welcome him first, as it is by tradition. On the threshold of their bedroom, she watches the dog jumps on him and covers him with kisses, as if she knew how many risks he faced, every time he comes out of here. But it is obvious that she knows it, because she once faced them too. Then follows Sergio, who, much more aristocrat, is limited to rub between his legs and to allow him to stroke him only once on his back. So, finally, Luke looks up at his girlfriend's, and when their eyes meet, there's the same intensity in the air as the first time.

-Hey.- he says only, walking towards her calmly, despite the immense desire to immediately enter in contact with her, to be one thing, because even if they were only a few days, if they talked at the phone until a few hours ago, and even that he could see her while she was giving them the right information to find the unknown subject... he missed her immensely.

-Hello.- she greets him, the shy and insecure tone, even the uncertain look. The man wonders why. He is already amazed to see her still up, because he usually found her in an uncomfortable position, with the light of the lamp still on and a book on her face, along with the glasses crooked on her nose or on the sofa, with the television on low-volume that lit her face intermittently. The indicator that she had tried with all of herself to wait for him, but in the end, she had to give in to sleep. And it was nice to lean over her, turn off the lamp or TV, take the book out of her hands or carry her to the bed... and wake her up with a kiss.

He takes her face in his hands, brushing her hair back, lingers a bit lost in her big brown eyes, then lays his lips on hers, before asking her the question. -Why are you still awake?- and he sees her looking down, at the slippers with the kittens she wears. And then she take his hands in hers.

-Weren't you cold, tonight?- Luke senses that there's more behind this question, but he doesn't understand what.

-Well, a little.- he shrugs. -Why?- and she imitates him, then drag him to the bed, lifts his pillow and shows him... a package. He looks at her for a moment, before opening it, and feels the hope in the air. His eyes widen when he understands what it is and a sweet, mischievous smile full of love shapes his mouth. -When?- he asks only.

-Every evening and night you haven't been here.- he follows her reasoning. -You... do you like them?- Luke decides that the best way to convince her is to try them.

-We can say goodbye to Cold Hand Luke.-

TAGS: @theshamelessmanatee @arses21434 @kathy5654 @martinab26 @reidskitty13 @jenf42 @gracieeelizabeth27 @silviajajaja @smalliemichelle99 @charchampagne14 @thinitta @myhollyhanna23 @garvezz @mercedes-maldonado @shyladystudentfan

#garvez #penelope garcia #luke alvez #criminal minds #penelope x luke #luke x penelope #alvez x garcia #garcia x alvez #cm

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elleberquist6 · 6 years ago

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Play Upon Me Like This Piano - chapter thirty-four

Summary: In many ways, Phil’s life is perfect: he loves his life in London, he has a wonderful brother and parents, and he has a great job as a radio DJ for BBC Radio One. There’s only one thing missing in his life… A rumor reaches an executive at the BBC about a talented local piano player named Daniel. The executive decides that Daniel would be the perfect guest on Phil’s radio show, so she sends Phil to speak with the evasive and mysterious piano player.

When they finally meet, Phil starts to think that he has found the person who will make his life complete. Unfortunately, Dan has a secret that will make getting close to him difficult.

Rating: Mature

Word Count:2935

Warnings: Smut

—

Siren fact: During his ten-year voyage home, Odysseus passed by the island where the Sirens lived… so as his ship drew near the rocky coast, he ordered all of his sailors to pug their ears with beeswax. Odysseus, however, was determined to hear the legendary music of the Sirens—and live to tell the tale. With this goal in mind, he ordered his sailors to tie him to the mast of his ship. He then gave orders that he should not be untied, no matter how he begged or threatened them…Odysseus heard voices, unimaginably high and clear, calling to him,“Come hither, renowned Odysseus, hither, you pride and glory of all Achaea! Pause with your ship; listen to our song!”

Odysseus was, understandably flattered, and he began to wish to meet the beautiful women who sang so sweetly to him. After a few more lines of the siren music, Odysseus was in a frenzy to be released. He raved at his sailors—who, fortunately, could not hear him since their ears were full of beeswax—and strained at his ropes until they cut into his skin. But the ship drifted on, and in an hour, the island was behind them and the spell subsided. [https://mythology.net/greek/greek-creatures/siren/]

Dan leaned against the bar to watch as Robert climbed the stage. While Robert fiddled with the mic stand to adjust its height, Dan took his phone out of his pocket to check his texts. There was a message from Phil, which said, Hey Dan, I’ll be leaving work soon. I should be there in time to see you get on the stage <3.

Despite his anxiety about the coming night, Dan couldn’t help smiling at Phil’s words and the fact that he would be seeing him soon. He sent Phil a heart and returned his phone to his pocket. As the microphone hummed with sound, the room quieted as everyone including Dan looked up, giving Robert their attention as he tapped his fingers nervously against his guitar, the hollow wood reverberating with the rhythm of his anxiety. He took a deep breath, and soon the fingers started tapping with a steadier beat and Dan knew this had to be the song he was about to perform.

Robert leaned into the microphone and said, “Hey there, I’m Robert. I’ve got a great show planned for you tonight. I’m going to be performing a song I love, and I hope I can do it justice.” Then he started strumming his guitar in the familiar tune of “Havana” by Camila Cabello. He leaned into the microphone and started singing. Impressively, he sung Young Thug’s lyrics as well, blending them seamlessly into the cover. The audience was on the edge of their seats and clapped enthusiastically as he strummed the final chords on his guitar.

Dan joined in the round of applause, and he beamed at Robert when their eyes met across the room. In his time away from the bar, Dan had started to forget how gifted Robert was – he was a truly talented musician. It made Dan almost jealous, seeing the way Robert had the room captivated by his natural talents and his skill honed by practice and hard work. Robert didn’t need a siren’s voice to entertain this room, and he deserved every clap the crowd was giving him.

As Robert’s set continued, a movement at the door caught Dan’s eye, and he looked over to see Phil entering the bar. The ocean eyes roved the room until they settled on Dan’s face, and he smiled. As Phil made his way across the room as fast as he could push through the crowd milling near the bar, Dan tried to compose his face – there was no reason to spread his panic Phil, just because Dan felt like his world was falling apart.

By the time Phil had arrived at his side, Dan had slid off the bar stool and he took Phil by the hand. He leaned in to say in his ear, “Come with me.” Phil didn’t protest as Dan led him by the hand to the side room and shut the door behind them. Dan leaned against the door, the sound of Robert’s voice now muffled as his performance continued outside this small back room. Dan took a deep breath and looked at Phil.

Phil’s brows were creased with worry. “You alright?”

Dan shrugged, unsure what to say.

Phil took a step closer and cupped Dan’s cheek. “Do you have stage fright? It’s going to be fine, Dan. You’re a brilliant performer. I know you’re going to be perfect. And I’m going to be right there to cheer you on.”

“It’s not that,” Dan mumbled as he reached into his pocket. He pulled out a small cardboard box and showed it to Phil. In a stronger voice, he said, “Hey, do me a favor and put these in your ears.”

Phil moved his hand from Dan’s cheek to take the box, which he then just stared at for a moment. He looked up, his head tilted to the side as he stared at Dan. “Wax earplugs? Why? I thought I came here to listen to you.”

Dan bit his lip, trying to think of a way to explain. Finally, he said with a shake of his head, “I didn’t invite you hear to listen – I asked you to come here tonight to look. Phil, tonight you’re going to see what I am, but first you have to put these in your ears. I promise it will all make sense soon.”

Without further complaint, Phil removed the wax earplugs from the box and inserted them into his ears. “There!” he proclaimed once done, and his eyes widened. “Oh, that’s funny hearing my voice all muffled like that.”

Despite his anxiety, Dan smiled at the look on Phil’s face and couldn’t resist leaning in for a quick kiss. When he leaned out of the kiss, Dan moved his mouth carefully so that Phil would be able to read his lips, as he said, “I love you.”

“I love you, too!” Phil shouted, still thrown off by not being able to properly hear himself.

Dan chuckled, but then heard the crowd outside clapping as Robert’s set wrapped up. He swallowed heavily, tasting bile in the back of his throat. “It’s time…” He nodded in the direction of the door so that Phil would understand. “I have to go on stage.”

As they left the back room, Dan stiffened his spine and held his breath as he walked to the stage. Robert was just stepping down from it, and he noticed something off about Dan’s expression that made him whisper, “You okay?”

Dan nodded, but couldn’t find his voice, so he shuffled past Robert and up the short staircase to the stage. His piano waited there, offering comfort and familiarity like an old friend that would never leave him when he needed it. He sat on the bench and poised his fingers above the keys, knowing that if he waited too long he would start thinking again and he would hesitate and think about the fact that maybe he was throwing away Phil right now, and then he would run screaming away from the stage.

So, without waiting a moment longer, Dan started running his fingers across the keys. A fast-paced melody poured out of the piano, the tempo seeming to match Dan’s racing heart as he had yet to calm down. Nervously, his eyes flicked up to the room. He usually started his sets with something simple and soothing, so he was used to seeing his audience look serene and subdued – this was very different. The quick jazzy melody he was playing had captured their interest, and the audience was giving him their full attention. Interesting… he usually had to sing to make them look like that.

Finally, Dan’s roving eyes located Phil, leaning near the wall not far from where they had parted at the door – he had wisely picked a place where he would have a view of both Dan on the stage and the audience members who were seated at the tables, though right now his ocean eyes were fixed on Dan. He was smiling. The sight broke Dan’s heart, knowing that Phil’s smile would falter before the end of this performance.

Fuck it, if Dan procrastinated too much longer he wasn’t going to be able to do this. As the melody reached a spiraling crescendo that seemed to have climbed to an unsustainable height, moments away from collapse, Dan leaned into the microphone and started to sing. He wasn’t looking at Phil anymore because he was too scared to see his face, but he glanced at the audience since he wanted to know what Phil was witnessing.

Across the room, people were falling under the spell of Dan’s siren voice. A moment ago, Dan’s audience had been watching him with a multitude of expressions. The people sitting closest to the stage had mostly been politely reserved in an attempt to not distract the entertainer, while the people sitting a couple rows back were rowdier (still listening, but their faces were animated and they had whispered conversations with friends), and then the people at the back by the bar had glanced occasionally at him but were more interested in their drinks.

Once Dan started singing though, everything changed. For a couple heartbeats, the people in the bar collectively held their breaths. Pupils dilated as all eyes turned his way. Faces became immobile. Someone dropped a glass that shattered, but no one turned to look that way. The people in the bar became still as stones. And then they all sighed as Dan’s song released a flood of endorphins in their brains. Dan continued singing for them as they barely twitched a muscle for the rest of his set. As he did, his eyes flicked to every face in the room except the face he wanted to see the most. He just… couldn’t. He couldn’t look at Phil yet.

Before, Dan hadn’t wanted to see Phil’s face and know if it was over. Now though, the longer he performed, the more he didn’t want to see Phil for another reason. As Dan sang for a room of drugged people with artificial bliss on their faces, he was ashamed and disgusted with himself. He was sure that Phil was going to feel the same, and he wasn’t prepared for that yet.

This was torment though. He would usually stay on the stage for the length of one more song, but he had been up here for as long as he could bear it. His voice died in his throat, he leaned away from the microphone, and his fingers flew through one last erratically spiraling melody before he took his hands from the keys, notes ringing in the air like the song of a wounded bird. Dan sucked in a deep breath, but it didn’t help anything. He stood from the bench and kept his eyes on his feet as he moved across the stage, unwilling to look up at the people who were now shaking off the effects of his song.

Dan knew that he was a coward, but he wasn’t going to run from this obligation – he headed to the spot by the wall where he last saw Phil, half expecting him to have already left. He saw Phil’s shoes first, the distinct fabric of them patterned with a galaxy, which only Phil could unironically pull off. Summoning every ounce of courage he had, Dan looked up. Phil was staring at him as he removed the earplugs from his ears. Seeing Phil’s red-rimmed eyes, he whined, “Phil?”

Phil just shook his head, hiding his emotions behind an unreadable expression – that uncertainty terrified Dan more than anything else. As Phil’s eyes welled with tears, he sucked in a breath to hold them in. The silence stretched on between them, and Dan decided that he wasn’t going to be the one to break it, since his voice had gotten them into this mess; this was Phil’s turn to say his part. After seeming to gather his thoughts, Phil said, “You… you’re a siren.” Dan nodded. “Those people… your voice did something to them.” Dan nodded again. “You did that to me, too. On the day we met. And after that also.” Dan bit his lip, and Phil sighed, as it seemed that was answer enough. He shook his head, saying, “Dan, I… I don’t know what to say. I… I really don’t know what to say.”

Dan nodded and whispered, “You don’t need to say it. I already know what you mean. This is it, right? You’re ending it?”

“Fuck, Dan,” the words were muffled as Phil rubbed his face, making his eyes redder and smearing the tears that hadn’t fallen yet. He shook his head as he said, “No, not that. Just give me a moment to think. I don’t know what I’m saying. I need to go somewhere and think. I have no idea… I need some time.”

Dan’s eyes squeezed tightly shut as he remembered something he said to Phil once, Phil, you said that we are going to find the word to describe what we are to each other. I think with time, I’ll find the word for this feeling, too. Phil, can I have the time to find it? Now that he knew how he felt about Phil, it seemed like it was all too late – soon Phil was going to find the words to end their relationship. It was nothing that Dan hadn’t expected to hear though, so he opened his eyes and nodded. He choked out the words, “Okay. Time.”

Phil opened his mouth but hesitated. He leaned forward, looking like his instincts were telling him to kiss Dan, but he pulled back. Sighing, he said, “I think I should go.”

“Okay. Bye,” Dan said, wondering if this really was goodbye. He watched Phil leave the bar, walking slowly like he felt it was all really a bad dream. Then he was gone. Dan’s shoulders slumped and he made his way to the bar, not paying attention to the people around him except for Johnathan as he ordered a whiskey from him. Dan was debating just putting his head down on the bar as he waited for his drink.

“So, you’re Daniel Howell?” a woman asked. “I’ve been waiting a long time to speak with you.”

“What? How do you know my name?” Dan turned to the blonde in her 40s who was sitting in the stool at his side. The question was instinctive, though perhaps foolish since he was sitting in a bar following a performance where his name was announced.

She didn’t give the expected answer though – she pulled up something on her phone and slid it across the bar to him, displaying a news article. Dan read the headline and the blurb, which seemed to be about BBC Radio 1’s Phil Lester, who had ‘a harrowing weekend with his boyfriend, after surviving a dangerous storm’.

Dan looked up from the article. “Are you a reporter? What’s this to you?”

“No, not a reporter.” She chuckled. There was a glint in her blue eyes that he didn’t like. “I told you, I’ve wanted to meet you for a while now. I’m Regina Hans, you can call me Gina. I work for BBC Radio 1. You might recall my name from some letters I sent you.”

The name didn’t ring a bell and he wasn’t sure why she was here. He asked, “You work with Phil?”

She nodded as she took a sip from a glass of red wine. “Phil works under me. I’m the one who sent him to speak with you, offering the spot on his show. I’m the one who he reported back to, relaying your message that you weren’t interested.”

“You got my message then,” he said in a harder voice. “You know I’m not interested.”

The glint blazed again in her eyes, making her look obsessed and dangerous. “I didn’t come here to pressure you about that. I accepted it when Phil told me that you weren’t coming on the show, and I only came here tonight out of curiosity. I wanted to know what the fuss was about. But now that I’ve heard you, oh!” She laughed and her eyes looked almost as mad as the man who had dragged him into the alley, and Dan knew that she wasn’t going to be rational – his voice had done something to her. “Mr. Howell, I’m not going to let this go. I must have you on the radio show.”

“I already said ‘no’,” he said in a soft voice, though a sinking feeling in his gut told him that this wasn’t going to go well.

Gina shook her head and she tapped her phone with a pink polished fingernail. “I’m not hearing it. Daniel, you are coming on the show. I don’t care what I have to do. Even if it’s something to Phil.”

He felt his face pale. “What would you do to Phil?”

She shrugged. “I can think of something. You see, he never told me that he was seeing you. That’s something relevant to his job, I think. If he slept with you instead of contracting you as I’d instructed, that’s very unprofessional. It’s grounds to terminate his employment – something that is within my power. So, Daniel, are you going to come on the show?”

He felt sick.

#phandom #phanfiction #phanfic #dan and phil #dan x phil #siren #merman #mermaid

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foolishone-downbad · 6 years ago

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Degree Trek: The Final Commencement

(I had to write an autobiographical literary response essay to The Odyssey for my World Lit class this summer. I went....a little over the max word count of 600 [1100 words total LOL]. Thought I’d share here cause creative writing..ish. I haven’t written anything in a creative fashion in a long, long time.)

In Homer’s The Odyssey, the protagonist Odysseus encounters many challenges that test how strong he can be intellectually, emotionally, and physically. His setbacks are thrust upon him through both the will of the gods, and his own folly at times. Although no modern day person can claim to have faced some of the same challenges (such as Polyphemus, Calypso, or his crew releasing the last of the winds from Aeolus) literally, every one of us can reflect on a challenge that may have felt like they were up against a figurative version of the same obstacles. My personal story begins in August of 2007. I was fresh out of high school, and decided to start the progress towards my Bachelor’s Degree at the North Harris Montgomery Community College District campus on Barker Cypress. I lost a few minor battles in the war that was gaining my Associates Degree, but ultimately I won the war as a veteran with honors. I graduated with my Associate of Arts in December 2009 as part of Phi Theta Kappa – the community college honor society. It was a milestone, but only a step on the way to my larger goal of a Bachelor’s Degree. I had no idea of the storms brewing ahead throughout the rest of my journey, or of the intellectual and emotional excellence that would be required from me on the arduous road ahead.

The journey from my Associate of Arts to my Bachelor of Arts seemed to be off to a strong start. However, I quickly found myself having to work harder than ever to keep financially afloat, which brought a new burden that would make it harder to stay afloat on the academic waters. I got far too self-confident at the amount of work which I could handle on both ends, almost screaming at life as if it were Polyphemus, “I am Amanda Pfluger! In the end, you will know that it was I who was able to defeat your challenges and come out on top.” Like Odysseus, I was punished for my cockiness with more difficult challenges. My father was sent to prison just as we were rekindling the close relationship we had not had in years. The sudden ripping of him from my life caused me to waver, and had it not been for one of my professors I would not have been able to push forward. She was my Aeolus, giving me the wind I needed to fill my sails with emotional strength and steer forward on my journey…until I fell asleep at the helm.

Fall of 2014 was an exciting semester for me: I was getting married in September, and anticipating graduation in December. I was continuing to struggle with my mental health, but felt like I could handle it on my own. Then something happened that rocked my world. One of my heroes committed suicide the day before my birthday, and unbeknownst to me set the tone that would encompass my life for the next four months. His death triggered a sense of despair and hopelessness inside of me: if someone with such a public air of lightheartedness and comedy, and so far into their life, could succumb to their inner demons then I didn’t know how I could possibly avoid ending up with the same fate. This entire situation exacerbated the depression and anxiety which I was already fighting, and left me listless for weeks. Eventually I was able to find the emotional strength to search for aid so that I could work towards getting better. It took me two months – until October – to get in with a doctor. When I went into their office for the first time I felt relief wash over me like waves on the shore. My husband, however, was less than supportive. He had a toxic attitude that did not believe in “invisible” illnesses, much less working to help lift a struggling person through emotional support. As our new marriage became more strained, my mental health did also. This translated to extreme difficulty in keeping up with my studies. December came, and I found myself failing in school. I also found my marriage failing.

I was expelled from the University of Houston.

I was handed divorce papers on Christmas Eve.

Like Odysseus who was suddenly forced away from the shore of Ithaca by the unleashed winds of Aeolus, I suddenly found myself many steps back from my degree. It felt as though there was no longer any hope in my journey. I had seen the light and had it abruptly taken away from me through my own missteps. My confidence was shattered on many fronts, and I was convinced I was not smart enough or good enough. It took a few months, but eventually I began to regroup and find the emotional strength to move forward and prove that I was good enough, and that I was smart enough. I threw myself into excelling at my job at an oil and gas company through learning new skills. The job became my Calypso. It was nice to step away from my journey and relax to contemplate the “immortality” of being able to move up the ladder at the company without a degree. After much contemplation and health issues, I realized that the potential for a well-padded bank account meant nothing to me if I wasn’t happy. I longed for a full heart that enjoyed what it did day in and day out. I escaped the island by way of finding employment at an elementary school. Working in a school revitalized my emotional strength, and caused me to want to push on again towards my original end goal of a Bachelor’s Degree. I began to look into new schools where I could pursue this, and decided to apply to Sam Houston State University.

Finding my way to SHSU was in many ways like Odysseus landing among the Phaeacians. I wasn’t home, but welcomed and offered much-needed assistance as if I were. I was able to regain the last bit of emotional and intellectual strength I still needed to prove that I could make it through to the end, with the help of encouraging professors and department staff. Through them, I have been able once more believe in my emotional and intellectual strength, and to once more catch a glimpse of the much more stable light at the end of the tunnel. In total, the journey from the victory at my own Trojan war to landing at my final destination will have taken me eight years of travel – two years less than Odysseus’ adventure.

------------------

On a funny side note for ANYONE WHO GETS IT:

My professor said the 600 word count was a loose cap, and that he’s with us until about 1000 words, but we’ve “probably lost” him at 1200.

I started panicking at 1000 words and MY DAMN FERRET (WHOSE NAME IS ATHENA BTW) came over and stood on my backspace button when I wasn’t looking.

GIRL THIS ISN’T THE REAL ODYSSEY, I DON’T NEED YOUR “HELP” ON MY WORD COUNT.

#odyssey #homer #greek mythology #personal essay #autobiography

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writerloading · 7 years ago

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BELLAMY BLAKE IS UGLY!

I’m kidding. (He’s not ugly) Now that I have your attention… I recently watched the CW show The 100 and just wanted to do a (really really long) review/reflection post about what I thought of everything. I will break this post down into seven different categories to fully and thoroughly analyze the plot and everything within. The seven categories are: Characters (their weaknesses, strengths and liabilities), Metaphors/Symbolisms, Ships (non canon/canon + gay representation), Storytelling/Writing, Overall basis of the show, The Hero’s Journey, and finally Continuity errors/180 Degree Rules. Disclaimer: Anyone who reads this doesn’t have to under any circumstances agree with me or disagree with me. You think of this post however you want, this is just my opinion. Let’s start with The Hero’s Journey.

1. The Hero’s Journey (Not all the steps, but most):

There are many heroes in this show, but let’s start with one first.

Separation/Departure: In a story, one of the first points that appears is this. The first section of the hero’s journey story is about the separation of the hero from the normal world. Separation has a symbolic echo of the infant transition away from the mother. This may imply some sort of separation anxiety. - The first episode shows our main character, Clarke, getting separated from her mother, Abby, and being sent to the ground to see if the Earth is now survivable.

Separation/Departure pt. 2 (The Call to Adventure): The hero starts off in a mundane situation of normality from which some information is received that acts as a call for the hero to take up a sword (literally or figuratively) and head off into the unknown. The information may be a problem, a challenge or request. It critically acts to trigger desire, whether this is to win the love of someone, recover a lost object, or defeat a villain. -There are many situations in which this occurs, but one of the first calls to Adventure is when Jasper gets taken by the grounders and now Clarke decides it is her job to head off to the unknown and defeat the villain.

Separation/Departure pt. 3 (Refusal of the call): The hero, hearing the call to adventure, initially may hesitate, reluctant to leave the comfort and tasks of their everyday existence. - A couple examples is when Skaikru is afraid to leave Mount. Weather because of what might happen to them. Or when Jaha leaves with Murphy and his crew to find the city of light.

Separation/Departure pt. 4 (Acceptance of the Call): After having perhaps first refused to accept the call to adventure, the hero finally gives in, realizing that there is nobody else who is better qualified to accept responsibility. This acceptance may come after reflection and persuasion following the refusal of the call, or the hero may be convinced by a mentor who provides aid. - When Kane tried to become chancellor, everyone turned on him and he realized that Pike is the one who gained the authority to take his place. Kane refused to accept the call to adventure to go after the grounders and finally gave in when he understood he had no choice.

Separation/Departure pt. 5 (Crossing the first threshold): The crossing of the threshold is the point of no return as the hero sets out on the journey. It indicates commitment change, leaving behind the old and accepting the new. - Jaha set out on his journey with Murphy and didn’t give up no matter what. He found the city of light, hence leaving behind the old and accepting the new.

Separation/Departure pt. 6 (Entering the Belly of the Whale): The hero enters the zone of danger. This may start immediately after the first threshold or may require some travel. - Bellamy enters a zone of danger when he snuck into Mt. Weather to save the prisoners and stop the acid fog. Jaha becomes a danger to himself when he ends up on the island of the place where Alie was located.

Initiation (Road of Trials): Having left home, the pathway to and through the adventure now lies ahead for the hero. The road may be long, but it is not dull as the hero faces many adventures along the way. Each trial may be more difficult than the last as the hero grows in confidence and capability. - Jaha’s confidence grows as he gets people to join the COL. He begins to become a different person because of Alie’s control of him.

Initiation pt 2 (The Meeting of the Goddess): On the road, the hero may meet a powerful female figure with whom he finds unity and bonding of some kind. She may be an ordinary woman with whom the hero gains support and synergy. - Jaha and his relationship with Alie.

Return (Rescue from without): The hero is rescued from a final plight from an unexpected source. The rescuer may be someone who had previously abandoned the hero or even someone the hero does not know. - Clarke becomes a nightblood and goes into the COL to turn off the kill switch from the inside.

Return pt 2 (Master of the Two Worlds): Having completed the journey out and back in, the hero is now a master of both the domestic and alien worlds and can pass over the threshold between the two without further aid. Having conquered her own fears in the quest, the hero is also master of the world inside them as well as the eternal world. -Clarke’s journey through the COL and how she was able to master into the world and be able to shut off the kill switch, gaining further information about the future of the world and now being able to control it once again.

2. Continuity errors/180 Degree Rules:

A continuity error I noticed is during the scene in season 3 after Lexa and Clarke had sex. Clarke was looking at Lexa’s back and saw her conclave circles. Clarke saw 7 circles and said how she thought there were 9. In another episode said said how there were 8 circles.

180 degree rule - when two people are talking, if person A is on the right and person B is on the left, then A has to stay on their right side at all times during the convo and B has to stay on the left. If A appears on the left at any moment of the convo, then the 180 degree rule in film is broken. - In episode 3x13, Bellamy and Clarke are standing on the beach and having a conversation. As you can see Bellamy is on the right side:

Clarke is on the left side:

There positions should not have moved through the entire convo. But after a few sentences, they do move. Bellamy is now on the left side, and Clarke on the right.

The 180 Degree Rule is now broken.

3. Metaphors/Symbolisms:

The opening sequence/intro shows 2 zeros crashing together. Those two zeros are two ark stations crashing together as you can see.

The infinity sign for the COL representing immortal living or living forever in bliss.

Incorporating (greek) mythology and also carrying it on through their characters. Gaia, Indra’s daughter is the name of a Goddess that is the goddess of earth. Helios, Octavia’s horse. Helios was a titan that was the personification of the sun. Helios flew a chariot of the sun across the sky as it was pulled by his horses.

Bellamy being like Odysseus and having to do certain things and stand by people (bad people specifically) so he will be able to survive through his journey.

For a while the intro appeared to look like this:

Once Praimfaya was on it’s way, it was like this:

I like how they incorporated the story into their opening. Gave it a lot more purpose instead of it just being a cool sequence.

The show also contains two famous movie references. One of them is Metropolis. Metropolis’s story contains a tower. The tower of Babel. In the plot, the tower is named Polis. The Metropolis tower vs Polis -

The second reference is the Matrix films. In the Matrix the characters “plug” themselves in from the back of their neck, going into another world. Similar ways that Clarke put the flame behind her neck to go into the city of light after she took the key.

4. Storytelling/Writing:

Season 1: The Exposition Season 2: The Rising Action/Crisis Season 3: The Climax Season 4: The Falling Action/Denouement

Season 1 and 2 are the setup. Season 3 and 4 are the confrontation. And Season 5 will possibly be the resolution.

Season 3 felt as though everything we’ve been building up in season 1 and 2 is what led us to the actual plot of the story. Before I wasn’t sure what the 100 was really about. Yes it was about these kids who were sent down to Earth to find out if it was survivable. And season 3 told me that.

When the 100 first came to Earth, they believed they were able to survive and that the radiation didn’t affect them. In season 4 it has come full circle (a symbol that is commonly used in the show) and now they’re affected by it.

In the beginning the adults were preparing to send the kids to the ground because of the lack of oxygen and now the kids of the group are trying to find a away to save themselves because of Praimfaya. The roles have switched.

According to @vintage-bellarke as well, there’s going to be another plot in season 5 - where the roles have switched. There is going to be a new group of people coming to Earth and now Clarke is the grounder fighting for her land.

They started with 100 and chose to pick 100 for the list for the ship/bunker. They also started with being on the ark and ended up back on it at the end.

5: Characters (Most of them):

I feel like Jaha has had the most development. He’s changed as a person throughout each season. He became someone different mentally and physically as each season passed. He begun as a leader who was strong and knew what he was doing and ended up as someone who lost all the hope he came to build up. To someone again who’s rebuild that hope and returned to being the leader he wanted to be. (Hence finding the bunker for the people)

Indra, Bellamy, Octavia and Murphy are other characters who’s development changed the story’s perspective.

Let’s talk about the list. And how Bellamy put Clarke’s name on it. One thing that bothered me is I understand Bellamy cares about Clarke, but there’s a point in someone’s life where they have to choose between love and what’s right. If I was Clarke I would tell Bellamy I’m not putting myself on the list. You can either agree with me and be on the list or suffer like everyone else. Because I’m dying too. It’s like when someone wants to go to college really far away and the person has to decide whether they want to stay with their SO and let their dream down or go to college and break up. If that person cares about them enough then they’ll not be selfish and let them go to college. That’s what Bellamy has to do. If he loves Clarke he needs to respect her decision about her being hesitant in putting her name on the list. I know he cares about her but at the end of the day, its still her choice.

I know there’s a lot of people who disliked Jasper because they thought he was annoying, but people need to understand something. I’ve seen so many comments about Jasper saying that he should die. Why do you want him to die? Because he’s an inconvenience to you? He’s depressed and suffers from PTSD. You can’t always have a happy character. What makes a good character is what that character goes through. The struggles they face. The development they undergo. And also the happy moments they have. All Jasper needed was someone to be there for him. And I think that when Jasper saw his name wasn’t on the list, it was like giving him the benefit of the doubt. He wanted to die anyways and when he saw that he wasn’t on that list, it made him feel worse. Like he wasn’t worth living. Even to his friends. If he saw his name on it I feel like he would think he was at least worth something and it would give him some hope.

I hate how when Octavia was hurt, she needed Bellamy. So he matters now because you’re hurt but he didn’t matter when you were beating him to death? And then she tells him he’s worth nothing to her five minutes later. That line in season 4 when Octavia was the winning champion and she said “We will survive Praimfaya together.” She was a terrible character the entire three seasons or so and then changing her attitude at the last minute isn’t going to make you a good character all of a sudden. The character has to earn their good. Now that’s just bad writing.

It also really bothers me how Skaikru is so selfish. I get you wanna live, but you can’t all save yourselves. Just because you hate the other 12 clans, doesn’t mean you have a right to be superior than them. All those other 12 clans want to live too. They all value their life. Like you think they wanted to pick only 100 of their people too? I’m pretty sure they all wanted to live as well. But they cooperated and did what they could. Especially Jaha. I thought he was better than that. He sent 100 of HIS people to Earth at first. You’re trying to save them now? Were you thinking about your people 3 seasons ago when you sent them to Earth? I’m not saying you’re a hypocrite, but..

At times I feel pity for Emori because she feels cast out from her people because of how she looks, of how she’s been treated, but then I remember she only cares for herself and is a bad influence on Murphy. Murphy seems better suited with Raven from the interactions that I’ve seen between them.

Making Octavia try to kill herself doesn’t make her seem that we should feel bad for her. She’s just trying to make herself feel like a victim even though she’s not.

Bellamy needs to give himself more credit. He has one failure and he thinks he’s failed everything. Even though he’s done so much to help everyone. I also know Bellamy just wants to save Octavia because he’s her brother but someones even your blood isn’t worth your time. You don’t need to be someone’s family if they don’t want anything to do with you. Like Kane said, “You can’t save someone who doesn’t want to be saved.”

Murphy is the kind of person who wants to be a good person, but is too afraid to show it. He hates himself so he believes it’s okay for other people to do the same. He hides his emotions so he doesn’t have to care. He needs to make peace with himself, like Luna said.

6. Ships (non canon/canon + gay representation):

The actors for Miller and Bryan don’t work well together. If they want the audience to believe they love each other, they’re not very good at showing it. They act more like brothers than boyfriends. And it’s more of the actor for Bryan. Every time Miller tries to show affection, Bryan acts like Miller just killed his dog or something. He’s not a very good actor. If you’re going to have two gay characters, at least cast a good actor. Or someone who’s not afraid to play the role. It annoys me because it’s bad representation. Miller seems to have a lot more chemistry with Jackson. Jasper and Monty acted more like boyfriends than Bryan and Miller. And they weren’t even dating. (Wish they did)

Clexa vs. Bellarke - I don’t understand how people can ship Clarke and Lexa. First of all, they have no chemistry within one another, and their relationship was badly written. It also had no development. Which is another example of bad lgbt representation. (And please don’t go calling me homophobic Clexa shippers because I’m gay as well and I’m not bashing on them, I’m just stating the facts) Through their entire relationship, if I didn’t know Lexa was gay, I wouldn’t have known they were going to kiss in the first place. All Lexa and Clarke did was try and keep their own people safe and hope one of them didn’t kill each other. And then suddenly they kiss. Niylarke (Niylah x Clarke) had more chemistry than Clexa. And it seemed as though they cared for each other. It was genuine love. Instead of the kind of love where you just feel like you’re in love. Clarke feels burdened by the fact that she wasn’t able to save Lexa. She slept with Lexa once and then she died and now Clarke thinks she has to be this big leader because that’s what “Lexa would of wanted” but what she forgets is that Lexa chained her up, took her hostage, almost killed her and her people, and betrayed her in Mt. Weather. Also Clarke spit on her. I know people want representation, but not when it’s bad representation. I rather have no representation at all than bad representation. Clarke saying she loves Lexa is like not being really good friends with someone and then after they die, all of a sudden they mean everything to you just because they’re dead. One example is in the Netflix show 3%. A character named Ezequiel had a wife named Julia. Julia was depressed and unstable because she wanted to get her son back. Ezequiel told her that she should just forget about her son because it was impossible to get him back and it doesn’t matter. Because of her sadness, Julia killed herself. After Julia’s death, Ezequiel went to connect with her son and began helping him. So he didn’t matter then when Julia was alive, but now that she’s dead, she matters?

Another example of bad writing was that Abby, Luna and Murphy all told Clarke that “They knew how much Clarke loved/cared (for) her (lexa). Which is kind of ridiculous with the fact that they’ve never met her or saw Clarke’s toxic relationship with Lexa.

I am neutral with Bellamy and Clarke. I would be okay if they got together, and if they didn’t, I would be okay too. But I can still see that they have wayy more chemistry and development than Clexa.

7. Overall

Overall, the show has great characters, good writing, and a strong plot. Sometimes that writing slips up here and there, but they always pick themselves back up. If you’re into post - apocalyptic sci-fi drama, here’s the show for you.

I give this 7/10 ★★★★★★★☆☆☆.

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survivoremathia · 8 years ago

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Rites of Passage

Ali: We never got to play together, but I hope we can do so in the future and align, or more appropriately align-us :)

Trevor: My robbed child. I was really hoping I would get to play with you.

Lydia: It's a bummer you were the first boot, I'd heard a lot about you

Owen: MY FRIEND. Coming into this game after having recently hosted you I really did want to work together. Unfortunately you weren't really around the first few days and that didn't work out. I hope we get a second chance soon!!

Ali: I never got to talk to you that much about why you quit and I was sad when you did! I hope someday in the future, you’ll have more time to commit to a game, and will be able to experience the wild and wonderful ride that I never expected to experience, as a GB Survivor fan. Trust me, it’s worth it.

Lydia: It's a shame you didn't have time to play, you should come back when you have more.

Owen: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Ali: The mysterious quiet person in the Odysseus tribe. I hope everything is okay, and that whatever the personal reasons were that were preventing you from being able to play have subsided. You were the only person alphabetically before me on the wiki, and when you left, you gave me such consistent anxiety, as I’d open the wiki and on the cast list with placements, I’d always be right underneath the previous boot and thought I’d gone home :)

Lydia: I hope that everything worked out for you, and life is going a bit easier now.

Owen: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Ali: Whew. We probably jumped the gun in voting you out, you were the scary mix of quiet but strategically intimidating. I was keeping up with ‘Great Lakes’ and was SO proud to see you kill it all the way to F6! If you had to be taken out by a 3-2-1 vote, it shows the threat you’d become. I’d love to play with you again and I hope to fulfill the prophecy you said in your last message, that a ‘newb will bring it home’.

Trevor: You already have a reputation even though you had barely started your first game when this one started. You were too much of a threat to have around so we took you out while we had your fate within our grasp.

Lydia: Our few short conversations were pretty fun. You're certainly a kid with an abundance of character.

Owen - Good job in Great Lakes you're in the sixth place fam now :')

Ali: I never got to play with you either, would’ve loved to though. All I can think of is some joke to do with ‘c-hole-in-one’, but I don’t how to put a golf joke into this? How can I put it… Or rather, PUTT it. Problem? Solved.

Trevor: Colin!! I really loved getting to meet you. I felt we connected well on our original tribes and I'm sorry to have abandoned you. I was shocked when you were voted out but it was a HUGE sign to me and helped me know how to play later in the game.

Lydia: We never really got to play together, which is a bummer because I'm still dying to know what a Space Gay is. Also you had a+ taste in survivors. Maybe next time.

Owen: YOU WERE ACTUALLY ROBBED IM SORRY THEY DID YOU DIRTY LIKE THAT!?!? Another angel fallen TOO SOON wow. Bring Colin back for all stars.

Ali: Eddie, I still feel so guilty for what I did to you! You need a Survivor Athena r-ed(die)-emption. That was a stretch, I apologise for that lmao! :) Thank you for being apart of one of the craziest tribals of my whole experience (and arguably my favourite). Please don’t hate me, you seemed super nice :)

Trevor: You're A scary player. Our talk before the mutiny was a big part of what led me to leave the tribe. I could tell you weren't being completely honest and I knew after that I may be in trouble on that tribe. Glad the game didn't harm our repaired friendship though.

Lydia: My only regret in this game is that I didn't get to vote you out myself. Sucks to suck.

Owen - I was never on a tribe with you but I hope you have a nice day.

Ali: Welp. We never got to speak all that much, but you seemed super nice. You may not’ve won the Pictionary you were playing with your family, but you won a place in my heart :)

Trevor: I still don't understand why you didn't talk to people. You doomed yourself. #TheLastEasyVote

Lydia: I wish we could have talked more! I never seemed to be able to catch you at a good time.

Owen - I WAS on a tribe with you but it never felt like it!!!!! Thank you for being an easy vote for us and I hope everything is alright.

Ali: I never got to play with you either, and it sucks that you went premerge as a former winner, but it’s indicative of the threat you were. If an All Stars series happens, I’d love to see your third chance, or really second chance, as your second game wasn’t a second chance, seeming as you won the first time , but your third game would be your second chance on your second game whew. That explanation? Pretty unnecessary, but anywho :P

Trevor: Coming into this season as a former winner you had a huge target on your back. I did enjoy getting to play with you and I think we could have actually worked together for a while. But knowing the merge was coming I did not think it would be good if you and Duncan were able to team back up.

Lydia: I was excited to get to play with you! Which is ironic because I know I voted you out, but you felt incredibly well connected at the time which made you an unquestionably dangerous, but also speaks to you as a player.

Owen: Wowowowowowowow I think you were the only former winner on this cast and that should've made you an instant target but you survived for a while. I think that and your relationship with Duncan probably did you in. I'm glad we are hosting together tho and we are still pals!

Ali: Like I say, you were rob-bed. I am so sorry you went home premerge, one of my few regrets in my game. I’m pleased you made jury, and really good luck with hosting ‘Death Valley’. I’ll CERTAINLY be watching :)

Trevor: Coming in from only knowing each other as Lake and Geo I didn't know how we would work in this game. Ultimately we didn't really get to play together at all but I was glad to see you go before the merge because I saw you as a huge threat to my game.

Lydia: We were never on the same tribe and don't think we ever had a conversation, but I hope you're having an excellent day!

Owen: I don't think I ever met you either that was all the sketchy idol and stuff I don't know but Rest In Peace.

Ali: I was in exile when you quit the game, and was really sad to hear that you quit when I came back :( I think after I played Guess Who with you and Sam at like 3am my time, I was bonded to you forever! Your memes will be in my memeory forever! :)

Trevor: I was probably most pleasantly surprised by you in this game. I loved getting to work with you and I'm glad I was able to convince you to mutiny with me. When I saw you left the game I knew I was losing a true ally but I hope everything in your personal life is going better now.

Lydia: Whatever reason had you leave this game I really do hope it's all sorted out now. I know you were overall a really loyal but risk taking player and I gotta say I appreciate that.

Owen: I don't know the terms surrounding your quit, but if something happened I hope it is better now and if you were just busy I hope you're finding time to relax real life is important!!!!!! Cool.

Ali: My second British comrade! We didn’t talk that much either, but you should be super proud of surviving the two swap tribals you attended, when you were seemingly an obvious target! I hope, like George, you’ll be able to play another game, where you can dedicate more time! I will try and represent Team GB, but hopefully not like in the Beijing 2008 Olympics, where GB came fourth medals wise. I don’t wanna curse myself like that!

Trevor: Ooooo scott. Wow. It took about three rounds of being on the same tribe before you finally talked to me lol. I knew no one else was talking to you so I used that to my advantage to steer your vote where I wanted for the next two rounds. Then at merge you disappeared again ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. With the amount of strikes you got I hope you're not a baseball player.

Lydia: You were honestly a really likable person, I think if you had been able to really get your focus here you could have been a force to be reckoned with.

Owen: HSJSHSJSJS WHAT AN ICON?????? I think we all knew you'd be removed and the strategy actually became like....working around your inevitable med evac rather than working around/with you as an actual player. Thanks for writing my name down at that one tribal :') rock on

Ali: Whew, Matt. One of the major tribals of this season was your vote out. You came into this game with such (m)att-ack and fire, that you were quite scary! Even though you went first post-merge, your impact on the merge game certainly never died out! Even now, people are talking about what you said and the things you told the players about who are threats, come F3. Holey ‘Moly’ (too soon?), you certainly left your mark!

Trevor: Coming to the merge I really didn't know if you being there would be a good thing or a bad thing. I felt like our friendship would be something that would bring us together but I wasn't sure where your head was at game wise. After talking a little I felt like we were on the same page and that we could maneuver the votes as a pair at least for a few rounds. once I heard you were coming for me, the head of the snake had to be cut.

Lydia: This is going to sound so fake but I swear I really mean it. Deciding I wanted to vote you out was actually very difficult for me. You were one of the first friends I made outside of my first season in this community and I had wanted to play a game with you for awhile. But then All Stars happened and that was rough, and this just really felt too soon afterwards to really build trust or play well together. Maybe that was a misjudgment on my part, and believe me, I'm really sorry if it was. It's not your fault you scare the shit out of me in games, but you play with such ferocity and unpredictability that I feel like you are always a serious threat to me.

Owen: I'm not sure why we never seem to click in games but I've known you/known of you for a long time and you're a legend!! Sorry we ended up on different sides of the battle once again.

Ali: Welp, we really spoke all that much, except for me giving you the number for that password challenge, when I said what rhymes with four hundred and eighty knee. Well, what rhymes with purer slumber door shoe gauze mobbed and that’s my thoughts :)

Trevor: I'm looking forward to confessionals to see if you really were playing under the radar or if you had a lot more going on. I felt like after lying to you about the Jay vote that you just would not trust me again. Plus you tried to vote me out :P. Your connection to Ryan was scary and that is a main factor in your ultimate downfall.

Lydia: Remember when I was so siked to finally officially meet you and play a game together? I really didn't take advantage of that. Unfortunately if I didn't have people target you, they would have targeted Ryan and I was captain of #TeamSaveRyan at that point. I know we didn't talk very much but I still feel like we had some good moments.

Owen: I enjoyed working with you in the beginning and actually getting to talk and play together for once!! I'm forever mad at Trevor for declining TAR All Stars bc you're a cool host and a cool dude. I think our trajectory was similar to mine and Matt's where we ultimately ended up separated. But I liked the few conversations we were able to have!

Ali: It was tragic that you went home. You bequeathed me an idol, that I fudged up with (sowwy!)! You’re one of the people I really hope to be friends with postseason. Like I said to Isaac, playing ‘Guess Who’ at that ungodly time bonded me to y’all forever. I hope the tribe’s overall prophecy is correct, and you do play on the real Survivor some day! :)

Trevor: I'm writing this one last because it is definetly the hardest. When the game started you were the only person on my tribe that I felt good about. I knew we had a little rocky history but you were still one of my friends and I just had a feeling I could trust you. I always pick one person in these games that I tell everything to, and since I didn't know if I would ever meet up with owen or Lydia, that person became you. I was relieved when we still ended up on the same tribe after the mutiny and you were still the person I told everything to, even with picking up Lydia on the new tribe. When I found my idol you were the first to know because I was giddy and so excited to tell you. I feel like this game repaired any cracks that there may have been in our friendship and I don't see anything changing after the game. You're an amazing person and I want to say thank you for giving me a chance to prove I'm not an asshole. Voting you out sucked and I hope you'll understand why it was necessary. Talk to you soon.

Lydia - I had heard so much about that I was so excited to see you cast! And holy shit did you leave you mark on this game. I really thought that you and me were going to be teaming up but it just didn't seem to be working out that way. I think we both were fighting for the same allies and that put us in opposition. I really did like talking to you though the few times we were really on together. You've got a very magnetic personality and if our roles were switched I would have enjoyed watching the rest if your game play out. If I see you playing in anything else you know you've got a stan in me.

Owen - MY OTHER CHILD DHDJDJ WOWOWOWOW I wanted to work with you more than anybody else in this game and I told you that as soon as we merged. I don't think you ever fully trusted me though because whenever we talked game you gave zero information except for the one time we were both being fake af lol. I imagined us going further together than we actually did. Still, you're a great player and a great friend and I can't wait for our band to become famous and we can leave all these survivor nerds behind. Looking forward to seeing you on tv in the fall for Survivor 35!!! Xoxoxo

Ali: Whew. I’m really sorry you didn’t make F3 this time :( You were a major power player this season though, and I really feel like if it wasn’t for the live tribal craziness, you would’ve gone all the way once again. I really appreciate all the advice you gave me during the season, and I’ll make sure to apply it, for when I play again!

Trevor: If I had to pick one word to describe our game together it would be: awkward. It started when you said you would only align with me for Owens sake. And went on to you saying things like when I thanked you for not voting for me and you said "I didn't do it for you" lol. I always found it laughable because it seemed like things you were thinking but shouldn't have said aloud. I knew I was never really part of your plans and eventually the fact that I knew everything you were doing through owen wasn't valuable enough for you to stay.

Lydia - God it was so great meeting you for the first time in this game. Getting to know you was like reuniting with an old friend from this past summer who I hadn't talked to since. Strange. Anyways, it's always really unfortunate when someone gets voted off simply because they were friends with a threat. Honestly, I really didn't want to be a part of this vote but logically it was the most reasonable thing to do besides voting out Owen, which believe me, I tried to sell that. It's safe to say that in both games we played together you ended up being one of my favorite people, you are a really enjoyable energy to have around. I hope we gave a third chance and can really team up for once.

Owen - I dreaded the day that I would have to either side with you or side with Trevor. I hope I proved to you through my actions at the final nine that I really did put everything I had into keeping you here as long as I could. Even though you kick my ass at 8 ball on the daily :'( I'm sorry that it was you and not me that became the causality of our alliance. Thanks for having my back again this time around and know that one day we WILL make a final two together. <3

Ali: After ‘Tea Time with Ryan’, I thought I’d never EVER want to play or even talk to you again. Having said that, by the time you went at F7, I’d had a complete 180 with you. That’s sorta why you had to go though, that’d happened with lots of people! Your gameplay and the underdog narrative you would’ve had at F3 were super scary! I hope to experience another ‘Tea Time with Ryan’ in the future but hopefully I’m not on the receiving end this time :)

Trevor: I admire you. I've always looked up to you a lot as a leader outside the game and try and emulate a lot of your dedication to the community. For the last little while I always felt like perhaps maybe I bothered you and I had trouble knowing if you actually liked me or maybe I just misinterpreted things you said. When the game started and we were swapped to the same tribe I was excited to work with you. And I felt a nice change from our conversations outside the game. We talked more and I truly felt like you were excited to talk to me. When I found out you were working with matt to plot my demise I was slightly hurt because I REALLY wanted to trust you. After that all went down I didn't know if you would even want to talk to me anymore. I'm glad we had that talk we did at final 9. And it was also nice when we brought the fam back together. Your vote off was a really low point in this game. I hope we can still be friends when this is over.

Lydia - Ryan Titty Palmer- I'm still SO MAD. No one believes me when I say this but you actually were my closest ally in this game and the one I had the most fun working with. We should be here together rn, this is a fucking tragedy. Our few calls were probably the highlight of this game for me (just in terms of enjoyment, not really success because...obviously). Anyways I'm glad we finally got to play together, I know you've played like 100 but since this is probably the last one for both of us for awhile, I just feel blessed. I know you already know it, but you're the best Ryan. You have the best attitude about games and kept me laughing every round even when you tried to fuck me over. You're a fighter. Honestly, lets be best friends????

Owen - Wow my dad!!! You're another person I wanted to play with since we have been friends for a while and we haven't gotten to be together in Survivor. It was truly a wild ride :') From siding together through premerge to making the fam to your going rogue and then back to the fam and then ultimately the round we went different ways, I'm glad we had our own SURVIVOR STORY to share and I hope we can keep talking in our draft chat after the season is over.

Ali: You went on such a journey this season. Be that with your gender identity, that you beat your Survivor record and that you lasted 7 more rounds, after all the other attendees at the 4 person Olympus tribal had gone home. I’ve learnt SO much from you about gender identity and I wish you luck at school and in your future. I have LOVED meeting you, I think you’re truly so inspiring. To end with a tennis analogy, you served it up this season! :)

Trevor: We came into this game with a rough history. But I wanted to get to know Logan. After leaving our starting tribe and then not meeting up again until merge, we never really got to start talking until merge time. I was mildly surprised when we worked well together and weren't actually targetting each other. After a certain point in the game I really thought we would go to the final 3 together but that all ended at final 7. It still kind of saddens me that you never even answered my messages after that vote. Hope you're doing well, bro.

Lydia - I am really sorry you got caught in the middle the way you did. It's not what you deserved or what I wanted to happen. Unfortunately, it was my idea and my push to go that direction because I believed it was the safest decision, so I am truly sorry for that. I feel like you are one of those rare people that cares more about making friends and relationships in these games than winning, and there's nothing wrong with that. In fact you deserve credit for it, it's not always easy. You are just honestly a kind and good person. I feel like that might be why we have some communication hiccups because I'm a disaster of a human and in general an asshole. Anyways, people like you are rare and we should protect you.

Owen - I think coming into the season we both maybe had some pre-existing misconceptions about each other based on what we had heard in the past or our different relationships with Trevor. I'm really surprised at how quickly we were able to find a place with one another and rock it out for a few rounds. I got to see a side of you in this game that I don't think a lot of people realized. You strategized just as much as others, you had a plan and helped make decisions and carried out things you had in mind. We constantly bounced ideas off of each other and I don't think either of us couldn't have gotten as far as we did without the help of the other. Thanks for being my main dude the last few rounds! We did that :')

Ali: My F2, my ride or die. I was so crushed to see you go last tribal. We’ve had quite the bumpy newbie ride this season. You were the one I trusted most, that I talked all about strategy with, that I would joke with and I almost wish you were here at F4 instead of me. It’s been a distinct pleasure to play with you this season and I hope we can stay friends in this game and beyond.

Trevor: My Canadian buddy! You welcomed me with open arms when I mutinied to your tribe and I am still very thankful for that. Our alliance is still my favorite of the game and it was a shame when I realized that it was falling apart. I was honest with you until that point, always was, because I didn't want to lose your trust. I'm glad we were able to mend fences before you left. Good luck in your future games :)

Lydia - Well...we had a roller coaster of a relationship didn't we? I know it probably felt like it was easy for me to do what I did but it wasn't. I did take my role as your mentor really seriously for the first half of this game and I loved watching you and Ali take my advice, and grow. Maybe I just hated watching you two making moves for yourself. I know that we fundamentally disagree about a few things, and I believe there is some legit miscommunication between us in terms of what happened and who made who feel what. But I never lost respect for you, and I never wanted to make you feel disposable as an alliance member. I'm grateful that I got put on your tribe and got to meet you, and really do hope that we can be friends after this game.

Owen - Both you and Ali were a breath of fresh air in this game!! To me, a lot of Survivor is about creating bonds with new people and actually getting to make friends and relationships. There's no prize money so what else is there to get out of it?? We didn't talk much until the end but like I said, I appreciated our last minute twenty questions session and I'd like to do it again some time. Thank you for being there for me when things got a little rough.

#allianceofone #rites of passage

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