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enhas-pov · 7 months ago

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prisoner

summary: mafia sunghoon is way too overprotective and possessive over his girlfriend, he wants to keep her all to himself

warnings: kidnapping(?), swearing, yandere behaviour, stalking

word count: 2.1k

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when i said yes to being sunghoon’s girlfriend, this isn’t exactly what i expected. i thought he would take me out on dates, buy me flowers, ask me to marry him and maybe even have his kids, but no. i’ve been held captive in his home for 3 years now, sort of. he does allow me to go outside obviously but i have rules. i always have to be with his body guards, i’m not allowed to wear revealing clothing, no drinking, no smoking, and no interacting with others. i’m basically his prisoner. besides that, i almost never get to spend time with sunghoon. he’s always out doing illegal shit while i’m stuck at home all miserable. tho when he is home, he’s either too tired or stuck in his office doing whatever on that stupid computer of his.

i was sat in the living room watching a movie when i suddenly heard the sound of sunghoon’s voice. “hi baby” i felt him place a kiss on my temple before taking his coat off. “hi. how was your day?” i ask him, pausing what i was watching. “exhausting. how about you?” he sat down next to me, threw his head back on the couch and placed his legs on the coffee table. “boring as usual” i was sulking which made him pick his head up to look at me. “it’s been months since you last left the house, of course you’re bored” i wanted to tell him that i was tired of being treated like his very own doll, but i wasn’t sure if that would make him upset or not. i placed one of my legs over him and wrapped them both around is waist so that i was sat on his lap. he cocked his head at me before bringing his hands down to my waist, squeezing me. i wrapped my arms around his neck and brought my hands up to tug on his hair. “hoon.. i was wondering if maybe we could go out? just you and me, together. as a couple” i bit down on my lip, not sure of what he was gonna say. “you mean you want me to take you out on a date?” he raised his eyebrows at me before i nodded in response. “___. you know i’ve got a busy schedule“ i gave him a pouting look which made him sigh. “i’ll try to make some time for you tomorrow, okay? but no promises“ i felt my face lit up, i was so happy that i was finally gonna spend some quality time with my boyfriend. “i love you, hoon” smiling at me, he looked happy as well. “i love you too, princess”

i looked at myself in the mirror and couldn’t stop smiling. i finished doing my makeup, i was dressed and all ready to go on my date with sunghoon. as i made my way down the stairs, my smile dropped when i saw sunghoon stood with his bodyguards. i thought it was just gonna be the two of us? “sunghoon?” he turned around and a smile appeared on his face when he saw me. “you look beautiful, ___.” he walked towards me and placed a kiss on my forehead, i was still confused to why his bodyguards were here tho. “i thought WE were going out?” he looked a little embarrassed, like he didnt know what to say. “baby, listen. something came up, and i felt really bad so i thought you could still go out, just not with me..” is he serious? who doesn’t have time for their own girlfriend? i crossed my arms and rolled my eyes at him. “i’ll make it up to you, okay?” he tried to kiss me, but i faced the other way so his lips met my cheek. he pulled away disappointed, but still made his way to the door and left. whatever, i did my makeup and got dressed so i might as well make the best out of it. i looked over at the 3 bodyguards i was left with, heeseung, jake and niki. i pushed my way through them and made my way outside to where the car was parked. “here you go-“ jake was kind enough to open the car door for me but i was still pissed, so i slammed the door shut after me. heeseung and jake were sat in the front while niki was sat behind with me. “where would you like to go, ___?” heeseung asked me, who had started driving the car. i didn’t feel like talking, so i just shrugged my shoulders. “how about the city? it’s where you always wanna go” niki suggested. i turn to him and slightly nod before turning back. “the city it is”

i had been walking around and doing some shopping for about an hour now and i guess it wasn’t that bad, i did need new clothes and stuff. “hold this for me please, need to use the restroom” i handed the bodyguard my shopping bags and sprinted quickly to the bathroom. after i finished, i was washing my hands when i noticed the window being open to let the fresh air in. i stared at it for a couple seconds before i shook my head. jumping out the window and running away so i can finally be free? no, that’s just dumb. i love sunghoon, i don’t need to escape.. i dried my hands and was about to leave the restroom when i stopped. i looked back at the window again, should i? sunghoon basically controls me and everything i do, i want to be my own person.. fuck it. i walked over to the window and climbed my way out of here. the second my feet touched the grass, i started running. where to? don’t know.

“it’s been 15 minutes. should we check on her?” jake asked the two other bodyguards who were with him. “we can’t just barge in. it’s the ladies room after all” heeseung suggested that they should wait a little longer before doing something they might regret or get in trouble for. “sunghoon said that we should always keep an eye on her though. who spends 15 minutes in the restroom anyways?” niki who was holding her shopping bags asked. “women” heeseung responded. “look. i don’t want to walk in there and get accused of being a pervert if nothing’s wrong. but if something is wrong, all three of us will get in way more trouble” jake sounded concerned. was he worried about, ___. or was he scared of what sunghoon would do to him? “alright, but i’m not going in there” heeseung raised his hands. “and i have to carry these” niki waved the shopping bags that he was holding. when jake walked over to the ladies restroom and opened the door, he sighed in relief when no one was there. wait, no one? he started panicking and looking around to see if she was in any of the empty bathroom stalls, but she was nowhere to be found. “shit, shit, shit-“ he froze for a second when he noticed the window that was open. no she didn’t, he thought to himself. “guys” jake hurriedly walked back to heeseung and niki, you could see panic all over his face. “what? did you walk in on her?” niki and heeseung were laughing, but this wasn’t funny. “shut the fuck up, she’s not in there. i think she might’ve jumped out the window..” they went from laughing to going silent, their eyes widened. “what are we supposed to do?” niki asked, you could tell he was freaking out. “sunghoon is gonna kill us” jake said as he kept on walking back in forth. “calm down. you’re making this so much worse by panicking. let’s go around looking for her, and if we can’t find her then we HAVE to call sunghoon. got it?” after heeseung calmed the boys down, they quickly separated and started looking for ___ right away. unfortunately they were unsuccessful. there was no sign of ___, she was gone. and there sunghoon was, stood in front of heeseung, jake and niki who were lowering their heads in shame (and fear). “you’re telling me you just lost her?” sunghoon sounded surprisingly calm, considering his girlfriend was nowhere to be found. “she went to the restroom and- i think she escaped through the window..” jake was very much struggling to get his words out. sunghoon nodded and placed his hand on jake’s shoulder. “just be more careful next time” he left after that. the 3 boys were confused, was that it? they didn’t know that the reason to why sunghoon was so calm, was because he was tracking his girlfriends phone down which she always had on her.

“where am i..” i was in the woods somewhere, it was 12am and it was really dark. not gonna lie, i was kinda scared. suddenly, i felt a shiver run down my spine at the sound of footsteps. am i not here alone? who else would be in the woods at 12am. i started speeding up my pace when i heard the footsteps getting closer and louder. i froze when i heard my name being called out. “___, baby i know you’re out here. if you come back home with me i promise you won’t get in any trouble” sunghoon? how did he.. i knew sunghoon was overprotective and all but this? he’s lost it and he’s fucking insane. i was never really scared of him, only when he’s mad. but right now at this very moment, i was too scared to face him. i started running when i accidentally tripped over a stupid rock. when i tried to get back up, i was met with a tall figure stood over me. “are you trying to run away from me?” the way he was talking to me. he sounded different, it was making me uncomfortable. “sunghoon..” still sat on the ground, i was trying my best to back away but he would just slowly walk towards me. when my back hit a tree, he crouched down in front of me. “you shouldn’t have done that, you know?” he brought his hand up to my face, but i slapped it away. it wasn’t on purpose, i was just scared. he shook his head and chuckled before gripping my arm. it was starting to hurt, i kept on moving my arm around while he was just blankly staring at me. “let go!” i gasped when i had accidentally hit him across his face making him fall back. yelling at him and then hitting him? i was done for. “i-“ “fucking bitch..” i quickly got up before he did and started running again, i kept on looking behind me to see him chasing after me. being chased by my own boyfriend in the woods at 12am wasn’t the date i was expecting. when i no longer had a sight of sunghoon, i quickly hid behind some bushes. i sat down and put my knees up to my chest, i covered my mouth and all i had to do now was to wait. if he thought i left the woods he would leave too, right? i closed my eyes shut when i heard the sound of his voice, he was near me. “you can’t hide from me, ___!” he yelled out. i could hear the anger in his voice and it was really scaring me. i didn’t notice how i had tears rolling down my face until i accidentally let out a sob, and even tho i was covering my mouth it was loud enough to hear. it went completely silent, i didn’t hear his footsteps or his voice. was he finally gone?

“there you are” i jumped at the sudden sound of his voice, shit. i slowly looked up to see sunghoon stood over me with a smirk on his lips. “come on. get up” he reached his hand out for me to take, i knew that if i didn’t there would be consequences. and i had already fucked up badly. i put my shaky hand in his and he was quick to pull me back up on my feet. he pulled me in closer to him and hid his face in my neck while his hands were roaming all over my body. “i can’t trust you now” he leaned away from my neck and looked me in the eyes. the look he had on his face was cold. tense, maybe. scary? intimidating? i don’t know. “hoon, i’m sorry..” i was shaking and crying in his arms. “shhh. you will be” he placed a soft kiss on my lips before pulling away with a serious look on his face. he wasn’t planning on hurting me, right?

#enha x reader #enhypen fanfic #enhypen fanfiction #enhypen fic #enhypen x female reader #enhypen x reader #enhypen sunghoon #sunghoon #park sunghoon #sunghoon fanfic #sunghoon enhypen

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l4brvtality · 10 months ago

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Hi, can you write damian x reader (likely grumpy x sunshine) about reader being cuddly and all that stuff and shes like afraid to come as clingy. One night she's reading all the comments about her being like that and decided to reduce her affection and damian notices

Heavenly

Pairings - Damian Priest x Fem!Reader

warnings - Reader feeling insecure about herself , Fluff at the end tho! , kinda angsty at the beginning

word count - 0.6k

NOT PROOFREAD

Gif not mine !!!

You and Damian were the complete opposite. While Damian was mostly dark and gloomy , you on the other hand were sunny and energetic. You were the sunshine to his moon. And although you two at first glance may be opposite to each other, you two understood each other like no other man or woman could.

You often found yourself cuddling and kissing Damian very frequently. But Damian never had a problem with the way you showed love , as he often reciprocated it by giving you small gifts , kisses , anything he could do from time to time to show how much you meant to him.

But as time went by , you noticed how Damian could grow distant , and sometimes dismiss your touches. It didn’t affect you that much , I mean he had things ti do. He was a wrestler after all. It didn’t affect you until now though. While scrolling on TikTok , you found a slideshow of someone expressing how annoyed they were at your touches with damian. Calling you clingy, and over all too much with him. You felt the tears roll down your cheeks as you read the comments. The words you read made you feel like you did need to stop being clingy towards him. And so you did

The following day , you hadn’t been and clingy towards him. Usually you were always hugging and embracing him , but instead you sat quietly as he did what he needed to do. He felt confused about your lack of affection, but thought you might have been tired. After all you had just had a match against becky lynch.

It had been a week since you and given the affection that you usually do. Damian was confused but decided not to question it , thinking something had happened during the week that you might’ve not wanted to talk about it. Neither the less he was determined to figure out how to get you back to normal. He wanted his girl back.

Damian woke up to the sound of you talking to someone on the phone. He checked the time which read 3:14am. Why would she be up this late? He thought to himself. He walked to where he heard your voice which eventually led him to the bathroom. He went to grab the doorknob , but was confused when he heard the words that came out your mouth.

“Yeah I dont know Rhea I just feel too clingy for him , I mean , the comments and videos show that. Yeah…,” he heard silence until you spoke again.

“I dont know I feel like I might be too much for him— I just dont wanna scare him off thats all,” You replied back to her.

A couple minutes later he heard you say a quick goodbye as you hung up the phone. You opened the doorknob and expected Damian to be sound asleep in the bed but unexpectedly, you found him On the other side of the door.

“Hey…” you said trying to ease the nervousness. “Calm down he probably heard nothing” you said in your head. But Damians facial expression said otherwise. He wore a frown as his eyebrows were pushed together. Withought warning , he pulled you into a hug. Damn near suffocating you from how tight he held you. He finally pulled away from you after a long couple of minutes.

“I don’t ever want you to feel like you’re too much , I love you no matter how clingy you are. It doesn’t matter about what people say because all that matters is how much I love you , and that goes to infinity,” he spoke putting both of his hands onto your face.

“I love you more Damian , I just think im doubting myself too much. But it feels good to know how much you love me,” you spoke with a smile , giggling a bit at the end.

“Now lets head to bed, well talk in the morning,”he spoke to you pulling your hand and leading you to the bed. With one last kiss , you to fell asleep as Damian spooned you.

#damian priest x reader #damian priest #damian priest imagine #damian priest x y/n

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accio-victuuri · 1 year ago

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OCTOBER READS 📚

Another productive reading month for me! Manhua/Manhwa binge again and for those who are interested in what titles I tried, then this is the post for you. I don’t know what the next months will bring but I wanna get back to reading novels… we will see how that goes. for now, I just feel thankful that these works are out in the world for people to enjoy ^^

• The Tyrant Prince’s Last Promise ( Chapter 74 ; Ongoing )

Adapted from the novel, “the wife is first” so I see why there are alot of people following the manhua. Jing Shao ( MC ) is a prince who is good at battles and was made to marry a male concubine Han ( ML ). He didn’t treat him well for years but Han stayed by his side even if he was sentenced to death and was accused of so many things. Right before they died, he promised to treat Han better.

So his wish gets granted and he goes back to their wedding night. Then the whole story focuses on their relationship and how Jing Shao pays his dues and tries to be the best husband for Han. He also tries to make different decisions to prevent him from falling from grace like before. This story is just so fluffy and sweet <3 and i love their chibi versions! ☺️☺️☺️ I might read the novel to see where it goes but i have to say it’s a standard trope — and i will never get tired of it.

Guilty Affection ( Chapter 47 ; Ongoing )

Esper/Guide trope but this one is more problematic. LOL. The MC, Han Yoonjae is an undocumented Esper and living his life as a normal person. There is some mystery from his past because you can tell that he is strong but decided to leave his life as an Esper. Then here comes the ML, Cha Minhyung. A popular & strong guide who comes to his life and offers to be his guide and make his life better. These two have a shared past and the story tries to uncover that. Also what will happen to Yoonjae and his power. I really like his power, and I understand why he will be someone that everyone will want to control. The relationship between them is not really the “romance” type but more co-dependence and lots of smut.

Crushing Jade & Catching Pearls Chapter 51 ; Ongoing

This one is very unique, I have never read something with this plot. It is modern era, but the MC/ML both work as apprentices for an old art of sculpting. Tho the ML ( Ding Hanbai ) is much older and is more accomplished in the field. It’s really more of the relationship between the MC & ML and less “romance” so far. I feel like some people will find it boring, but there is something about it that draws me to it. and it doesn’t hurt that the art is pretty. Ding Hanbai starts off as an asshole who bullies the MC Ji Zhenzhu — but then they slowly become closer. The MC who is the goodest boy with puppy energy melts Ding Hanbai’s heart 💕

No arguing with Mr.Mo Chapter 71 ; Ongoing

The trope of Mr. Cold hearted CEO who is actually a simp for the MC is not new and I usually like it — I often root for the MC and hope they get together. But in this one, I find myself liking the ML ( Mr.Mo ) waaaay more than the MC. To the point that I don’t think the MC deserves Mr.Mo at all. I get that Xiao Nuo have some trauma and baggage of his own but his drama over nothing just irritates me. Mr.Mo is straightforward and clear with his intentions, but MC takes advantage of him, willingly or not, is not my cup of tea.

I won’t be continuing on, or if i do, maybe it’s to see Mr. Mo’s panels.

Hard Boiled Love Chapter 93 ; Ongoing

I only finished up until Chapter 40 cause I felt like there is nothing else for me as a reader to see, plot-wise. I could be wrong but maybe I will pick it up again when i’m in the mood. This is popular, and i understand why, the trope is catchy : Rich kid and his Bodyguard, then add BDSM into the mix. Boom! There is just no way that people will not click and read. It is a good read and enjoyable but I wasn’t in the headspace for that type of smut, the interaction of the MC/ML tho are sweet!!!! 💕

What captured me tho is the ML. Hwayoung Yoon. He is a lovable psychopath. He gave off so much Hisoka vibes ( from the anime hunterxhunter if you didn’t know ) and this type of character would do so well if done in live action. How he seems to be this sweet boy that his family dotes on but is secretly a sadistic bastard. I mean, look at him as a kid:

A master manipulator.

The MC too, Gyuwon, is well written. He is an ex mercenary who really wants to be someone’s sub ( in a sense ) but he doesn’t think that will happen because of how he looks. People have expectations of how he should be but lo and behold, he meets the fucked up Hwayoung. 😂😂😂 it’s more light and funny considering the subject — they could make the plot really dark, so i’m glad they didn’t.

Campus Trap Chapter 24; Ongoing

AHHHHHHHHHH! My new favorite. The omegaverse hoe in me is screaming! 🤍 too bad there are only a few chapters out. I honestly want to read the novel which is already completed but i’m still trying to figure out how to navigate korean sites. The plot of the story may seem dramatic to some, because it’s all about the MC (Chaewoo) who is an Omega and trying to make ends meet. He was once this kid who lived a pampered life but things changed and now he is a struggling student. One day, his Uncle, told him about the concept of a reset partner, which is kinda like a surrogate. So a dominant omega like him will be a surrogate to a rich dominant Alpha. He agrees and finds out that the Alpha is someone he goes to school with — Mister popular, Euigeon. It doesn’t help he doesn’t like the guy and Chaewoo is even jealous of his “success” cause he feels like he will be the same way if unfortunate events didn’t happen to him.

I LOVE IT. I LOVE THEM. The campus setting and the two being music students is also a bonus, it’s only beginning to be explored and I wanna see more. They have great chemistry and the way I squealed during the car scene. 😱😱😱 it’s also the type of story where I can’t wait for the ML to fall for the MC. I’m reading about Euigeon being this arrogant bitch to Chaewoo and i’m like— can’t wait to see you fall head over heels and regret your actions. It’s nothing abusive, if anything, I feel like his actions are reasonable cause he doesn’t want to make their relationship complicated. It’s supposed to be a business transaction. I wanna know more about ML too cause i’m sure he has so many issues that caused him to be this way. I have spoiled myself a by reading comments on the novel but i will surely keep an eye out on this till it’s completion.

Miss you, Lucifer 15 chapters ; Completed

A short Manhwa that is full of uwu and love! 🥹🥹🥹

If you want something to lift your mood up then this is the best pick. Honestly! It had everything: romance, comedy, angst and some plot in there even if it’s only 15 chapters. The premise is an “idol” from a boy group that’s not popular x A-list actor pairing. I don’t wanna spoil too much cause it’s better to just dive into it, and like i said, it’s not that long.

Business as Unusual 15 Chapters ; Completed

Another short one that I enjoyed. 💕

Tho i’m not a believer of getting back together with your ex. Lol. That’s the story here. MC/ML were a thing back in college and because of a misunderstanding they “broke up”. Years later, they meet again as office mates and rekindle their romance. I’m happy for the characters because they had a second chance at love and are now at a better place to stay together.

Considering the length of this, there was one scene that really stuck with me. The two are walking on the street late at night and ML is chasing the MC, he wants to talk but the MC won’t listen so he shouts:

“HEY! MY FIRST LOVE KIM MINJUN!” 🗣️🗣️🗣️

It’s so funny considering why it was said, to get someone’s attention — but also so romantic. It is like a scene in a k-drama.

Tied To You 64 Chapters ; Completed

I feel so lucky that I found this title in it’s completion cause i would absolutely go nuts if I had to wait, to find out what’s gonna happen next. As soon as I started, I couldn’t stop and took me 5 hours to finish the whole thing. So worth it. This kind of Manhwa is the reason why I keep reading, hoping that I will find something like this. It’s really something special. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

the synopsis is as follows:

It’s only sleeping together while holding hands, nothing else. That’s what Shin Wooseo tells himself when a red ring that ties a person to their soulmate appears on his finger one day. Once two people get tied by the ring, they cannot fall asleep unless they’re physically together. However, his destined partner isn’t his long-term friend and secret crush, Kang Jiseok, but rather his older brother, Kang Jigeon! And so starts the tragedy of loving one brother but having to share beds with the other. Although, it might not entirely be a tragedy, as Kang Jigeon doesn’t seem so disappointed about being tied to his younger brother’s best friend…

I don’t usually go for love triangle tropes, but this one is not really that kind of love triangle. The strength of this Manhwa is the storytelling. Every panel & interactions served a purpose. As a reader, you are pulled in and can’t help but want to know more. I also appreciated that we can see the perspectives of 3 different people, but moreso on the MC/ML. I liked the concept of “love” that was portrayed too — it’s something that you have to work and fight for. It’s a conscious choice and not all sweet gestures.

Now i wanna spotlight the ML, KANG JIGEON 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 If I was to rank my fave MLs from all the stuff I read, he would easily be in the Top 10. He is manipulative but in the best way because all he does is for Wooseo to pay more attention to him. I have to say that he ultimately sets up the “scene” but most of the time the choice is still with Wooseo. His devotion is very real and his approach to fighting for his love is ( to me personally ) admirable! GO GET YOUR BOY! I’m not even mad at him.

I’ve been wanting to read a character like him, a chaotic good if you will, and that’s probably why this made such an impact on me. It was hilarious seeing the comments of readers in the early chapters being sus about Jigeon and thinking he is gonna be an asshole ML. In the middle, they were confused whether to love or hate him and the schemes. Towards the end, everyone was cheering for Jigeon and applauding him. Lol. I guess he was successful in making the readers fall in love too. ❤️

The King and Me Chapter 36; Ongoing

The story is very unique, atleast to me, cause I haven’t read anything set in Ancient Egypt + Time travel. There is also some heavy plot aside from the romance and every character here is just beautiful and badass!!!! The first few chapters broke my heart. I swear. It was effective in setting up the MC’s quest and why he is so stubborn when he goes back in time. What he is after is so important. 💪🏼

I adore the MC (Zhang Li)!!! He is so smart and determined to find out the truth about his “Rocky” and the tyrant king. His circumstances are not the best, but he tries to adapt and is not some love sick fool. Even if the main reason that he is there is because of love. This story is still in it’s early stages and I feel like it could easily go up to 150++ chapters because of the plot and well, the progression of MC/ML relationship. It’s also a slowburn so if that’s your thing, you would enjoy this.

Manhattan Romance Chapter 40; Ongoing

This reads like the kind of novel set in a specific city, in this case, NY, and two people meet each other and fall in love. Of course there are challenges and issues between the characters and their environment but the central story is their relationship. I think people who will read this would want to be the MC (Hyeon), in a way, all because of how much the ML (Luwan) dotes on him. Hyeon has his own issues and he is a precious bean that is too good for this world! I’m so happy that Luwan is the person who “caught” him and not some toxic shit. Let them live in their penthouse and be happy, Let Hyeon paint more masterpieces and the two of them to travel the world. ❤️

Ordinary life of a Universal Guide Chapter 61; Completed

Because i’m a sucker for esper/guide universe I had to pick it up. There is really nothing “special” with the plot, it’s the usual for the trope. My comments sounds like i hated it or something lol but the truth is — it’s alright. I picked this up after reading really good ones ( tied to you & the king and me ) so this was an in between read. I can’t always be that lucky.

The Third Ending Chapter 67; Completed

OMG how do I even begin to describe this perfection. I’ve been seeing this on other people’s list but for some reason I kept putting it off. Funny how I always manage to “start” reading something really good just before bedtime — which delays the “sleeping” I should be doing 😂😂😂

First of all, I love the art. It reminds me of Omega Complex that was so pretty so that helped a lot. 🫶🏼

Synopsis:

Suh Yoonseul has had life easy—everyone likes him, he’s good at his job, basically everything has always worked out as smooth as butter. However, there’s something that brings all of his good luck down, and it’s the infrequent dreams he has of Kang Joon. Who knew that rejecting a guy once would hang so heavy on your life? To make things worse, after he runs into Joon the dreams keep on coming daily. At his wit’s end, Yoonseul takes some advice from a friend so that he can free himself from this jinx. It’s simple. Make Kang Joon think that he’s a nice person. That can’t be hard, right?

Yoonseul is one of my favorite MCs. He’s a chronic people pleaser and has this perfect facade that he presents to everyone. So when he remembers being mean ( showing his true self ) back in high school to someone who confessed to him — he can’t let it go. It was so fun to see him suffer when it comes to winning Joonie over ( AHHHHHH Joonie is the most precious and can do no wrong!!! ) because tbh his intentions weren’t good. He is selfish. The entire season 1 was such a treat. Seeing their relationship progress and I— I don’t wanna spoil anymore but this could easily be a kdrama. There was that scene in the snow. AHHHHH! I was screaming while reading it! Lol. Season 2 is sweeter and more on fluff, by that time, you’re already so invested on them that you don’t care about any plot. Personally, what I loved about this is their mutual obsession towards each other. I’m a fan of that. I like tropes that are about “fated pairs” or something similar.

Between the Lines Chapter 20 ; ongoing

Not gonna say too much about this and I encourage people to wait for more chapters but it has a solid start. The MC/ML are both likable. Especially the MC. The premise is also hilarious, cause MC is a bl writer who is having a writer’s block and needs an inspiration for his protagonist. Here comes ML, who acts like Mr.Perfect ( but he isn’t ) and inspires him. There is so much more going on here that I feel like will be explored more as the story progresses so i’ll definitely come back to it.

Necromancer Survival 79 chapters ; 2 seasons completed and s3 is TBA

I had no idea what was in store for me when I decided to pick this up. I have a thing for necromancers and this one has the whole “dungeons” concept to it so I was down. But like — this probably ruined every other story for me. In a good way. Now I want a plot-heavy type of story with the romance as a bonus only. All I’ve been reading so are heavy on the romance & relationship, this has that element too but you get really invested with the plot.

Synopsis:

When the weak and unconfident Choi Yikyung first found out that he was a user, he thought he had finally hit the jackpot. In Yikyung’s mind, Necromancy seemed like the ultimate mix of cool and interesting. Back then, he had no idea that the Necromancer class was the weakest of them all! But as Yikyung enters the newly reopened Tower of Spirits in search of enhancement materials, he is sucked into a mysterious area of the dungeon where he encounters a frightening corpse. “Ding!” A quest window pops up, and it says… “You have made a pact with Seo Dawon, a vengeful spirit.” When tackling quests, it doesn’t hurt to have a companion or two, especially if one of them is the spirit of an ultra powerful and handsome young man. After all, “it’s dangerous to go alone”!

Don’t let the art fool you. It’s not some bright and shiny story. I made the mistake of thinking it’s gonna be some g rated adventure story lol It’s literally a necromancer whose goal is to make a master/slave pact with all the members of a dead team. He has to fulfill their wishes and help them get their revenge— which means killing a lot of people. It comes with a price, because every summoning is making him weaker in some aspects. Also no one knows what the true power of a necromancer is so whatever it is he’s doing — they don’t know what will happen to him in the long run. I freakin love the concept and how it’s mixed in with the romance. Is Seo Dawon only attracted to Yikyung because he is his master or are these real feelings? How will this relationship even work when one of them is Dead? A huge bonus too are how likable the other characters are. Especially Jung Garam!!! 🫶🏼

I hope the Manhwa continues cause I wanna see them get that revenge! 💪🏼 I wanna know too if Yikyung’s power will allow him to resurrect people and if so, what’s the payment?

I see lots of comments that say this adaptation does not live up to the novel & source material. Which i get it — a Manhwa will have restrictions, especially on the themes. The novels seems more gruesome and explicit ( not the sexual kind ) which usually has to be toned down for a Manhwa to get a license. Plus from what I can tell, the Novel is like 500 chapters ++ with a concept so niche and is for a specific type of reader. So yeah… I’m not sure if I will pick up the novel. I don’t have that urge yet, tho I am very interested in the censored scenes and if it’s really as dark as people are saying it is. I have a feeling it’s right up my alley. && I read some comments that Yikyung gets more dangerous as the story progresses ( getting corrupted by the summoning and the practice of necromancy ). I’m very curious! 👀

If anyones decided to read this, lemme know what you think. 💕

Black Mirror Chapter 64 ; Completed

This is the perfect spooky + sexy read for the season we’re in right now. From the first page down to the end, I can’t stop reading and wanting to know what happens next. It perfectly captures that eerie feeling, even if there are a lot of explicit scenes, it’s still there. The author really planned this well and the artist perfectly executed it. I don’t explain more because it’s best to go into this blind and experience the story for yourself. Highly recommend ✨✨

====================

See you all next month ^^ & feel free to recommend me some titles! 💕

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thewritingginger · 2 years ago

Text

;) Alphabet - Ran Haitani pt. 2

Wow! It’s been a HOT minute since I’ve posted I’ve been in a rut lately but I’m trying to work myself out of it :)

In the mean time here's some spicy Ran HCs for your Tuesday

Fandom: Tokyo Revengers Letters: C, E, G, O, U Warnings: 18+, GN! Reader, Talks of sex

Enjoy ~

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Ran’s cum is usually pretty thin & not a lot comes out

If he’s on a business trip/ too busy to get off w/ you or by himself he might produce more

He enjoys cumming inside his partner, if they want him to, but he really likes painting his partner with his seed

Spraying it onto their belly or onto their used hole feels more territorial to him than filling them up

Isn’t afraid to eat his cum out of you oop

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Ran has a fair amount to experience

Most of them are one night stands or short term flings

He does have long spells w/o action cuz work gets in the way and it can become more of a hassle than fun to get laid when he is trying to work—also not to mention boi would probably prefer taking a nap over the risk of having a meh lay with a one night stand

But all that said, he knows enough to get you off and listens well enough to become a pro at working your body

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

As we know Ran is a little chill boy

Of course he, if in a serious relationship/ is down bad, he will slow things down and make love to his partner

But if something happened like knocking heads or stumbling he just laughs it off and gets back to business

He never wants his partner to feel bad when you should both be feeling good

Also he can have a playful streak

Especially during foreplay/ the initiation of sex

If you’re ticklish, he might use that against you

He might say some cheesy/ silly shit

“So cute I could just eat you up, Baby,” he says as he is kissing and playfully biting down your torso and sides, or your inner thighs towards the space inbetween

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Loves lazy licking on his partner

He could honestly spend a while between your legs

If he catches you lying on the couch he might strip off your pants and get to work between your legs for the fun of it

He is part of the does it for HIS pleasure gang

Of course tho he does love seeing your lips wrapped around him

He’ll sink far into whatever seat he is in—the couch, his office chair, ect— with his hand gently caressing your hair as he watches you work yourself up and down his shaft with that lazy smile of his

He also praises you, both while giving or receiving 😉

“You taste so good, Baby”

“Stop? Is my tongue too much for your sensitive body? I’m sorry, Sweetheart but I have no intentions of stopping till you come on my tongue.”

“Just like that. Good Girl/Boy.”

“You are so good for me, knowing just what I like, huh.”

Honestly on nights he wants to get off but is too tired, he loves opting for oral/ using his hands

But he loves it as a “main course” any time, any day

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He is a teasing mother fucker

It’s not always in a hyper dominate way during sex

He finds it much more fun during foreplay—he’ll do it out in public if the mood strikes him

“Careful, Baby, keep looking at me like that you’ll let everyone you’re dripping in your panties for me.”

If he put a toy in you before y’all left the house he likes you turn it on when you least expect it

Once when you were out to dinner with him and the guys he had you squirming in your chair, trying hard to hide it. He just put his hand on your thigh and leaned into your ear,

“You all right, Sweetheart? Do you need to go to the bathroom?”

Then he just laughed when you gave him a glare

Hope you liked that!

If you want to see more, let me know

Feedback & Interaction is always appreciated :)

💛 ~

~ Masterlist ~

#tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers headcanons #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers smut #ran smut #tokyo revengers ran #tokyorev ran #tokyorev ran haitani #tokyorev ran haitani x reader #ran haitani #ran haitani x reader #ran headcanons #x gn!reader #*nsfw #*nsfw alphabet

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bloggingboutburgers · 1 month ago

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Hello again from the crunchy fishstick! Based on your latest tapas comic update, guess you had a fun Halloween ^^ "sexually anorexic" sounds both confusing and funny lols

I dressed up for the day myself...went out as "a maid from the 23rd century" and got a few compliments--but it wasn't until after I already got home and changed out of it that I realized maids are apparently not just a fun cosplay choice but also something sexualish?? :') oh, the woes of accidentally doing something that might be seen that way to others without realizing it.....I sincerely hope nobody who saw me thought anything sexual (I just liked wearing a skirt and being cute for onceeee)

I've been "out" as aroflux/arospec to some (online) friends already and thankfully I didn't find out any of them were aphobes. (yay!) A few didn't really get it even after my short explanation but oh well--kinda tough with non-queers sometimes but they're cool otherwise. Got the "so like a plant?" reply as a joke lol. One friend, one of my closest, had a hard time understanding how I could be an arospec and dating my bf so that was...something. Didn't get it when I was like "I just fluxxed into a demi phase" but eh. At least no one's an aphobe and no one laughed at me (with intent to make fun of me) for it!

The "you just haven't met the right person yet" hits hard though ngl...recently I tried to lightly hint and bring up that I'm arospec to my mom cause...yeah, I'm kinda tired of "be careful about dating" "don't start liking boys too early" and stuff like that. So to simplify it, I was like "I feel like I'm probably on the aro spectrum, a spectrum of people who just don't do romance like how lesbians don't like guys or gay guys don't like girls" (disclaimer: some things have to be REALLY simplified to boomer-minded people, sorry if that offends anyone or seems to exclude them or anything, it was just the best way I could think of to shorten it) and she thought for a moment before telling me "you just haven't met the right person yet".

I mean fair, I am still young and full of vinegar but still...I mean I did see it coming from her but I still said it (didn't really reply on that topic after though). Oh, to be pulled through a laundry machine of thoughts and having to wonder if you're really a legit aro or if you jinxed yourself again (there's a history...fun stories). Maybe eventually I'll reach the stage where I'll confidently think "yep, I'm arospec" on a regular basis like I did about my bisexuality...maybe it just takes time... Rough being a wishy-washy and indecisive sort of person who doesn't have the lines fully clear :sob:

If I want to be arospec and I feel like I identify with it (even if I get a little dysphoria of sorts sometimes), then that's enough to call myself one, right? Maybe that applies to more queer identities too...

Idk I'm just prattling on again sry, in between a few bad days and there's a sort of comfort in typing it all out anonymously like this... Thanks for existing mate, and uhhh the crunchy fish stick is signing off for now!

fjigkdf Sorry I'm replying sooooo late after Halloween TwT To be fair, the comic I shared on Webtoon/Tapas that day was from a previous Halloween, but watching horror movies around that time of the year with my partner is something we do every year, just from a distance, it's par for the course

I sympathize tho TwT I'm still puzzled to this day as to why a professional uniform was turned into something so sexualizable, I can try to reason it in my head as playing with taboos or power and maybe that's sexually exciting for people somehow but I have no idea how that reasoning works since I'm very much clueless about anything sex-related so... Yeah. It's an odd one to me for sure. Always will be I guess.

I'm really glad coming out to people has been a good experience for you overall!! That's honestly so fortunate when that happens TwT And I'm glad any potentially hurtful comment that some of us typically get was only shared as a joke, from a place of not understanding but willingness to understand, or with the exception of your mom, from what I get.

To be honest, it's a sad thing to accept, but I think sadly it's possible some people may expect you to eventually be "fixed" forever, even if you yourself know for a fact you'll never change and will repeat it endlessly. I'm out to all of my close family, living grandparents and parents' relatives, and I'm pretty sure at least one of them expect it to be that way still. I don't do much about it, since as hurtful as it can be, it's just some hopes they're projecting on me without seeing the real me, and yeah, it's kinda painful, but they can't control me with those hopes. Heck, I was mentally prepared for my parents to be like that with me. I'm incredibly fortunate that they're not and they accept me for what I am now (although somehow I think getting a queerplatonic partner really helped in the matter, the idea is probably much less scary to them than me not having a partner in any way, shape or form for some reason). But... Yeah. In my younger years it wasn't really shaping up like my parents would accept my orientation, and they are now, so there can still be hope. Whatever happens to you, I wish you the best either way.

And... YES, if you feel an orientation defines you well, then it IS enough to call yourself one. I only have my experience to go by but I feel it's extra hard for orientations like ours where they're so often stigmatised, invisibilised, perceived as a "phase" etc etc. What we may not get in demonization and hate, we get in being treated like something that doesn't exist at all. And that's tough for the confidence to affirm yourself in that orientation. But yes. If you feel it defines you, if you feel it describes who you are, then it IS enough to be right. Nobody has the right to make that ultimate call for you, but yourself.

...Welp, at least that's how I feel about it. As always I wish you the best moving forward, thank you for checking in, and sorry again for the late reply! TwT

#crunchy fish stick #anon #aromantic #aroflux #arospec

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adorerinn · 5 months ago

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HIII I LOVE UR MATCHUPS AND IS totally normal about them and would love one too pls, and I'd like to be 🎏 anon!

I'm a girl and l'd love a LONGGG romantic matchup with a guy please

A brief desc of what I look like: I'm 167 cm, l've got long brown hair w new bangs which I love. I have some semblance of siren eyes which unfortunately scare some ppl off ://, therefore I’d prefer someone on the taller side please 🫶🏼

Personality: I'm the most versatile person I know, a true ambivert I believe. love quiet time but also feed off of energy when I'm around people and is totally okay with just sitting in silence with my friends. I'm attentive to my people and my giving love language is gift-giving, acts of service and quality time. I'm very aware of a lot of things happening around me, especially myself. I notice things most don't see like how my friends walk in different shoes (literally) or how they shift their body when they're uncomfortable. But this awareness also makes me feel bad sometimes when I notice something's up and I do nothing cause it gets so tiring, and then i feel guilty afterwards and think about what I should've done to help when literally no one had either.

I'm an ENFP and l'd love to be paired with a char of a suitable mbti. I'm confident, a little too much sometimes but mostly as a joke, about my looks and values in life. I also LOVEE deeptalks, depth in conversation is what i live for!!

I'm an artist and I love to draw and want to become an art director when I'm older cus l'm also a businesswoman at heart (gotta get that bag yk)

I'm also a huge fashion kid, as in whatever funky piece of clothing i see, i style and wear. I mix it up a lot so anything with squiggly fabric or ruffles and skirts as tops, you get the gist.

Ideal type:

I'm not super sure i can encapsulate a "type", but I'm not into gruff types (like iwa l'm so sorry), a little mean yes but not gruff yk. I'd love someone with a sense of humor and one that can match my energy, both calm and otherwise. I need someone attentive towards me as

much as i am to others. And someone wealthy please, i love giving gifts to people and showering them with support and affection and sometimes i just feel like it's one sided (apart from my family I receive gifts like i do others with only 3 friends :/). It might be a little selfish i know but i just need to feel loved like that i guess? And someone willing to ride all the scary rollercoasters with me (adrenaline junkie)

Appearance-wise, l'm into more feminine faces, my max for masculine is like chris evans , but i think all asian faces have a touch of femininity in them so i have practically no rejects in terms of characters. No facial hair tho, I'm super icked out by that, and body types are also versatile. My fav char is tsukki and he's built like a pencil but i love bo's body type too :))

Dream date: I'D LOVE A DANCE DATE, not professionally but like dancing tgt to pop classics from the early 2000s is a dream, literally anywhere (a club, the living room etc)

I hope i got everything, sry if it's long i love to ramble looking forward to a reply, thanks so much 😋😋

I match you with Suna Rintaro!

✧ Suna would definitely be a perfect match for you!

✧ you could for sure have a long and romantic relationship with him (I just feel like once he's found that special person he sticks with them no matter what)

✧ loves your ambieverted personality even if he's a bit more on the introverted side

✧ likes being able to spend some quiet time maybe put on some music while he's at it (I just KNOW he has a good playlist for every occasion)

✧ always keeps any gift you give him. he will probably just have the all scattered around somewhere in his room but he does appreciate them a lot

✧ likes being able to spend time with you even if you aren't doing anything or just sitting in silence. he just appreciates your presence

✧ definitely notices how you notice the tiniest things and thinks it's cool especially since he's the same way. you both would probably whisper to each other and just point out the smallest things ever

✧ always reassures you that it's okay and that you don't have to always help out people even if you noticed it

✧ likes how you can be confident even if it's just as a joke he thinks it's cool you can be confident even if it's not real. he just appreciates it and prefers people to be confident instead of just always being shy or something like that

✧ would for sure have late night talks about the most random things which will eventually lead to deeper conversations but he all for them

✧ he probably watches you draw and if you were to give him a drawing he would most likely have one of your drawings folded up in his wallet or some random jacket pocket

✧ likes how you have a dream to be an art director. he likes it when people have a goal set in mind instead of just going with the flow

✧ adores your fashion sense. he just thinks it's cool to have such a unique fashion taste. would also probably want you to choose some of his outfits if he can't decide what to wear

✧ most definitely has a sense of humor. (I feel like he has brainrot humor IT'S TRUE BC I SAID SO)

✧ would be able to match energy (he's probably still a kid at heart I just know it)

✧ of course most of them time he is very calm and attentive. he would probably notice when you're feeling even a little bit down and would try to cheer you up as best as he can

✧ would definitely buy you small gifts that he sees in shops and gets them just because they reminded him of you

✧ LOVES going on roller coasters and will go on whatever ride you choose. he just likes the thrill of rides

✧ would like to just mess around and dance to stupid music. he would enjoy to dance in the living room (he probably wouldn't wanna go to clubs just because he tries to act all nonchalant)

✧ overall I think Suna Rinatro would be the perfect match for you and you both would get along great

hi anon!! I hope you enjoyed your match up feel free to request again!

#haikyū!!#haikyuu #haikyu #haikyu fluff #haikyu x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu oneshot #hq x reader #hq fluff #hq #suna rintarō #suna rintaro x reader #suna x reader #suna rintarou #suna rintaro haikyuu #suna rintaro fluff

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sunlightellies · 2 years ago

Text

"deal."

�� masterlist

→ pairing: Bella ramsey x reader

→ genre: notfamous!bella, hospital!au, angst, melancholic, fluff if you squint, gn!reader

→ tags/warnings: mentions of dying and death, do not read if you get triggered by death. angst!!! slowburn-ish (takes a while until the reader is introduced. sorry peeps.). cursewords. a friend of bella's is not so nice:(

→ word count: 8k+

→ proofread? sorryy no

→ a/n: i saw someone say they wish there were more angst fics with Bella and as an angst lover myself i couldn’t help but to write some. warning this got way out of hand so this is like, SAD, sad. if you like reading heartbreaking things and enjoys to suffer like me tho then this will be perfect for you! also i know this isn’t a very accurate fic,, but i did it for the sake of great fanfiction, so don’t be mad. i hope you all will like it anyway!

(i try to stick with the same pronouns for Bella in fic writing but sometimes i slip up as i use any pronouns for them when casually talking about them; in this fic i’ll mainly use they/them for Bella, but excuse me if i use another pronoun as well lol.)

→ summary: While you sat on the bus on your way home thinking about Bella, Bella was laying in their hospital bed at the same time thinking about you. At this time neither of you knew how inseparable you two were eventually gonna become. Maybe running in the corridor at a hospital is sometimes a good thing?

It was another regular Thursday for Bella. They were on their way home from the television workshop while Phoebe Bridgers was playing in their earbuds. Walking in pace to the music and taking a left turn right at that cozy café they always thinks about visiting, but still never does. They could see the front of his gray apartment building, walking a little faster as they wanted to get home as soon as possible.

Bella yanks up the door as soon as they unlock it. “Jojo, Skipper!” The two pets came running at the sound of Bella. Their friend and roommate Vera owned the two pets together with Bella. Vera asked Bella if they could feed the cats before they left the television workshop since Vera wanted to stay and practice a little longer. “So.. are you hungry?” Dragging out the sentence they look at the two pets with an eyebrow raised. Jojo answers with a loud meow. “Me too Jojo, me too.” Bella chuckles to themselves while putting their bag down and taking off their shoes. They walk into their kitchen and take a painkiller. They’ve had this weird problem with headaches recently, so taking medicine for headaches has become a daily routine for them every night. Bella didn’t think much about it, they were very active, studying and doing theater, which both took a lot of energy so they thought their headaches were due to some kind of stress and that it was somewhat reasonable.

A few weeks later Bella was eating by themselves after practice and they thought about trying to drink more water and start taking some vitamins. The headaches were something they could live with before. But as the weeks had gone by they had gotten worse and on top of that they had gotten unusually tired and were often feeling nauseous. Bella believed that it might have to do with some kind of lack of vitamins.

The semester was slowly coming to an end and Bella had recently found out they got into LAMDA (London Academy of Music and Dramatic arts) to pursue performing arts. It was a huge achievement for them. They had celebrated with their friends the night they found out, and now a few weeks later he was beginning to pack their things for college. Bella sat down on their bed looking at all the boxes, trying to decide where to start. They had written down on all the boxes what should go in them, to keep things organized. Although Bella had trouble reading on the boxes due to their blurry vision.

“Have you had that eye exam that you were talking about a few days ago?” Isaac took a sip of his coffee as he was looking at Bella while waiting for an answer. Isaac was a close friend of his, they had been doing theater together for years. Isaac was part of a group of people at the television workshop that Bella always practiced with and some of them also go to LAMDA. They all were really close and had been for years. Today Bella was only hanging out with Isaac though.

“I went there and got my eyes checked but it was really weird. She kept asking me questions. She started with headaches and I get that, it’s somewhat logical she’s asking me about that, it’s normal to get headaches while trying to see, you know?” Isaac nodded. Bella took a deep sigh and continued,

“But then she kept asking if I’ve had problems with nausea or vomiting, feeling confused while doing everyday things and having difficulty with balance.” Bella paused to take a sip of their tea.

“Did you tell her yes? Because you know I’ve seen you struggling both in school and at practice lately. You’re a really good student Bella, and an amazing actor. I mean you just got into LAMDA dude. If you told her no, I’m gonna be disappointed because obviously something is going on with you, and you need help. We’ve all been telling you to seek help from a doctor but you’re too stubborn.” Isaac was looking at Bella while putting a hand on their shoulder, “Me and the others are really worried about you. I know you haven’t exactly gone into details or talked alot about what’s happening but don’t think that we’re not noticing that you’re in pain and having difficulties.”

Isaac who was usually a very upbeat guy was for once very serious. Bella felt kinda embarrassed and kept looking down on their cup while stirring it with their spoon. “I told her yes when she asked me about it, and then she didn’t say anything more than that I should book a doctor’s appointment and check it out. So I did.” Bella kept staring at his tea while hearing Isaac ramble on about ‘he’s been telling me to go to the doctor for weeks and how can I even listen to a random woman immediately like that and not my friends’.

Bella was sitting outside the doctor's office with Brianna and Isaac at their side. Bella didn’t like going to the doctor, but they knew they had to. They weren't feeling well and they had started to get worried. He was a little bit nervous, so Brianna and Isaac offered to come with him as support.

“Bella Ramsey?” a woman's voice sounded out. Bella stood up and Brianna gave Bella a reassuring smile before they followed the woman. They went into her office and sat down in one of the chairs. The doctor was looking at some journals in her computer before turning to Bella and smiling. “Hi Bella. We talked on the phone a few days ago. Do you remember?” It felt weird the way she said that, if they could remember it. Of course they could. Not the whole conversation, but parts of it. Bella decided to not put much thought into it and just simply answered, “Yes, I do.” The doctor continued to smile at them and said while nodding, “That’s great. So we both know why you are here?” Bella nodded and then they kept talking about their problems for a while. She was asking questions about how it affected their everyday life, how school was going, what symptoms they were having and the progress of them and if they had gotten any more since he called.

They talked for a while and she did some tests on them regarding balance, memory, sensory and finally a blood test. “Okay Bella, we are done for today. I’ve scheduled an MRI for you in a few days, please don’t forget. We’ll call you a day before about preparations. Bring a close one if you feel scared or nervous.” Bella nodded and took the paper the doctor handed them and got up from the chair they sat on. Bella shook hands with the doctor before they turned around and walked out the door.

Isaac and Brianna stood up as soon as they came back into the waiting room. “So what did she say?!” Isaac looked nervously at Bella. “Nothing. She asked me some questions and did some tests, and then just said that she scheduled an MRI for me. I don’t know what for.” Their hands were fiddling with the paper they got before they handed it over to Brianna. Brianna read on the appointment paper while Isaac whispered, “damn, this may be worse than we thought.” Brianna hit him in the arm and looked at him. “You dumbass, don’t say that! It’s just an MRI!” Isaac said a quiet ‘sorry’ while rubbing his arm where Brianna hit him.

All three of them were quiet on the way to the television workshop. No one really knew what to say. “Maybe we should google your symptoms?” Isaac finally spoke up. “Stop saying dumb ass things Isaac, or else I’m gonna get that headache soon too.” Brianna paused before talking again, “We all know that googling your symptoms is just gonna scare everyone more. We all know except Isaac.” After that it went quiet again and everyone kept walking slowly to the television workshop to meet up with the rest of the group. Isaac said it may be worse than we thought and Brianna said it’s just an MRI to calm them down, especially Bella, and it’s normal to get an MRI sure, but a doctor would definitely not schedule an MRI if the problem was a loss of vitamins. Bella’s thoughts were racing with different scenarios. They knew it probably wasn’t a big deal, but they were still scared.

“Hey guys!” Isaac opened the door to the studio while Bella and Brianna came shortly after. A few voices were heard from all across the room that greeted the three people entering. “How did it go at the doctor’s office?” A guy with blonde hair spoke up. That was Asher. He’s a great actor, but an even greater comedian, although Bella always thought Martha was the funniest one in the group. “It was fine, nothing special, she scheduled an MRI for me.” Bella said back to him while going up to hug him, but Asher took a step back. “An MRI? Why?” Asher looked puzzled. “Well I obviously need one. Why else?” The practice started but Bella had to sit on the side most of the time. Today the dizziness and nausea was really bad. They couldn’t even stand up straight and even if they were stubborn enough to keep trying, their friends told them to sit down. They gave Bella a look of pity before going back to practicing.

That night when Bella came home they went right to bed. They were so exhausted. Their mind was blank. Not a single thought. They sat down on their bed and took a deep breath and then began to change their clothes and then just threw them on the floor before sliding under the covers. After a few minutes of trying to sleep, the thoughts came running back like a herd of horses. They started thinking about what will happen, what has happened to them. They knew it was more than just an MRI, more than what Brianna had said to calm their nerves. Bella wasn’t stupid after all, they didn’t need google to know what their symptoms could be.

A few weeks have gone by, and Bella’s parents are in town to help them and be there as support when they’re going to the doctor to find out the results of his MRI scan. They have been worried sick over the last few months, trying to talk to Bella about it but only hearing from their friends about how’s it going for Bella. Bella hates feeling weak, especially in front of their parents. It cuts Bella’s heart into pieces about how they’ve tried to make their parents proud their entire life and now all their work is at risk of being all ruined. His parents have of course always been proud of them, whatever Bella’s done. They were happy for Bella when he got into LAMDA but they wouldn’t be less proud if Bella got into another school, and as for now, they won’t be disappointed that Bella may have to give up their spot in the school. All their parents could think about this day was how whatever ends up happening, they are gonna be there for them and they’re all gonna get through it.

Bella texted with their friends in their group chat on the way to Dr. Watson’s office. They were obviously nervous, and their friends were too. The chat got sentimental quick and they all swore to Bella that they are gonna be there for them no matter what. Bella felt good expecting the worst, that way they wouldn’t feel as shocked if it’s worse or just as expected, they would also be relieved if it wasn’t as bad as they thought.

The ride to Dr. Watson’s office was just as quiet as it was in the waiting room. Neither Bella nor his parents knew what to say. They were all just hoping for the best. As Dr. Watson came and called out Bella’s name, they rose up from their seat in a swift move and went after her, their parents following. Bella had told Dr. Watson earlier that their parents would be coming with them so she had already prepared seats for them all. When they all sat down Bella’s parents sat on each side of Bella, and both their mom and dad grabbed a hand each from Bella. Dr. Watson welcomed them briefly before cutting right to the chase while she brought up a file and took out the MRI scans of Bella’s brain. “I’m sorry but I’m not bringing good news to you today, Bella.” she started off and looked right at Bella, “You have Glioblastoma.”

Bella knew what that was. They knew it was a severe dangerous tumor in the back of their head. Dr. Watson kept explaining what it meant, using a pen to point the mass of cells in the pictures while going on about how it mostly occurs in older patients but can happen with younger people too, how it’s not genetic and how you treat it and other stuff that Bella couldn’t catch up on. They weren't really listening and were just tuning out all sounds, stuck with their thoughts. They could feel his parents holding his hands tight and saw their dad wipe his tears in the corner of their eye. Bella thought expecting the worst would help them cope with bad news, but it didn’t. They were in shock and didn’t know how to react. Their mind refused to believe the things they had just heard.

“So Bella. We’re going to put you in chemo first. We’re going to schedule a surgery as soon as possible but because the surgery is severely dangerous, complex and risky, it’s unfortunately going to be hard to find a neurosurgeon for this so you might have to wait a few months.”

The meeting finally came to an end after what felt like hours to Bella. Their mind still couldn’t really register what just had happened, but they were happy their parents were at their side and how they comforted them through the entire appointment. Bella’s parents still held their hands but let go to shake hands with Dr. Watson. On the way out their dad was walking at Bella’s side and held his arm around them tight. Their parents continued to smother Bella with love and support the rest of the day.

Bella was laying in their bed that night, staring up at the ceiling, and thinking through all the events for the day. Their phone was blowing up with notifications and calls, but they couldn't bear to answer. Their friends were calling and texting, so worried and of course wanting to know what the doctor had said earlier that day. Bella just looked over their shoulder at their phone, picked it up, turned it off completely and then going back to not give a single fuck about answering them. Bella needed time. They barely knew what had happened and needed to regain their thoughts and energy before talking to other people. They didn’t want to hear people's pity for them and they most definitely didn’t wanna answer all their questions. They could wait.

Four days had gone by and Bella was on their way to the television workshop to talk to their friends. They haven’t talked to them at all in the last few days and they finally gave up looking for answers from Bella and eventually talked to their parents. Bella knew that everyone that knew them, now also knew about their diagnosis. The word spread fast, and as soon as Bella started their phone again after a few days with it turned off, it overflowed over with notifications, texts, voicemails, and calls,

“I’m so sorry Bella. Sending our blessings.”

“Hope you get better soon, we’re here for you.”

“Sending all our love and support to you.”

The texts just kept coming in and Bella had a hard time holding their tears back for the first time since they got the news. They haven't been able to cry in the last few days, not a single tear. It was frustrating for them, they wanted to cry. They wanted to lose their mind and just let it all up. But they couldn't.

Bella finally arrived at the television workshop after a long and slow walk. They stopped right outside the black door and took a deep breath, slowly reaching for the door, finally opening it and walking straight to the room where their friends practiced. Opening the door and seeing all their friends sitting on the floor, doing nothing. Martha was fiddling with her shirt and Asher was just staring down into the floor, the others also fiddling or just staring into the brown wooden floor. It was unbearably quiet, still no one heard Bella come in.

“Hey guys.” Heads snapped at the direction of Bella’s voice and shocked faces were immediately seen before they all rushed up to Bella’s side. Hugs were shared and tears were shed. “We have been so fucking worried dude. I swear. We haven’t been able to practice without you and definitely not without knowing if you are fine.” Martha spoke up first after the silence, hugging Bella tight. Bella chuckled, “I wouldn’t really say that I’m fine, but I feel better now that I’m here with you guys.”

Bella talked to their friends about what the doctor had told them, what their illness is and how the treatment works. They answered all the group’s questions and it felt good getting it out. Bella was afraid they would treat them differently, treat them with pity and caution, but they were the same. Teasing and joking about the situation. It felt good to laugh about it. They eventually started changing the subject and Bella felt happy. Bella felt hope and luck, thinking that with these guys by their side, they were gonna get through it.

The days went by and Bella was now on their way to the part in the hospital where they would get their first chemotherapy. Martha and Brianna were supposed to go with them for support but ended up being stopped by the guards in the reception. They weren’t allowed to go with them. Only family was allowed. Unfortunately Bella’s family couldn’t come to visit them this time around. Bella took a long time to walk up the stairs. Counting the steps as they set one foot above the other. They could’ve taken the elevator, but they didn’t want to. They wanted to drag out the time as much as possible, and they weren’t in a hurry anyways.

“305.. 306..” he paused at the last step and looked up, “.. and 307.” They went up the last step and began walking towards the map just a few meters in front of them, because they weren't really sure where to go. The map said they should go to the right and as they turned, he saw the sign for the ‘chemotherapy’ immediately. With even heavier steps than before, they continued their stroll towards their first chemo.

a few months later…

Bella was currently living at the hospital. They had gotten worse and the chemo wasn’t working. They were now in chemotherapy and radiation therapy because the doctor wanted to try them as a combination. However, Bella was still waiting for the hospital to find a neurosurgeon to remove their tumor and it didn’t seem that they were in luck of finding anyone soon.

Bella’s friends came and visited them almost everyday. They were really grateful to have them on their side. They often showed Bella their new plays, they played games together, watched movies or just slept when Bella wasn’t in the mood to hang out. In the middle of their thoughts a sudden raise in volume rang through the room. “You cheated!” Bella looked up from their cards. “I did not!” someone screamed back. It was Wilmer and Isaac that were fighting. Bella wasn’t really paying attention at first due to their head being full of thoughts, but after a few seconds they came back to their mind. “Hey, hey, calm down and stop screaming. Let it go. Think about Bella, don’t stress them up for nothing.” Martha told them and Isaac, who was accused of cheating, who had also risen from his seat, sat back down. Both Wilmer and Isaac looked ashamed for a second but it all went away quickly as they kept playing.

After a few hours they all had to leave for practice. Bella was all worn out, they always were after hanging out with them. They didn’t have much energy these days due to all of their medication and treatments. But they were getting hungry and it wasn’t dinner yet, so they went to talk to the nurses if they could have his dinner early. As Bella opened the door from their room they only took a few steps in the corridor before someone ran into them.

“Oh my god, I am so, so sorry! How are you feeling? Are you hurt?” The sweet but panicked voice ran through their head as they looked at your hand that you were holding out for them to reach so you could help them up. They grabbed your hand and you helped them up from the floor. “I’m fine, and it’s not all your fault, I should’ve checked the hall before walking out.” Bella chuckled as they looked up at your face, studying your features. You were really beautiful, but they didn’t recognize you. “Have I seen you here before?” Bella asked you as they turned around to close the door to their room.

“For starters, no, it was all my fault, I shouldn’t even be running here anyways. For the second question, probably not, I really don’t spend a lot of time here. I was just dropping something off for my mom. She’s a nurse.” You broke into a smile after you finished your sentence and it was the prettiest smile Bella had ever seen. “Oh okay, makes sense. Nice to meet you though, even if we kinda had a rough start.” You both let out a laugh.

It went silent and Bella looked down to the floor and saw the bag that you were holding. “Wait, is that carbonara!?” He looked at your face with a shocked expression. “Yes, it’s for my mom. She forgot her dinner so I brought her some.” Bella's mouth went into an ‘O’ shape before they spoke again. “Wow. I’m so jealous. I haven’t had that shit in forever, and I sure do miss it.” they chuckled a stiff laugh. “You want some? My mom needs this for her dinner but I can go back to the restaurant and get some for you, my treat.” You gave them a smile as Bella visibly got excited and showed it through physical movements, not for long though. “Oof, I really shouldn’t be doing that” They said as they bent over and took some deep breaths. “But wow, you would really do that for me? That would be amazing.”

An hour later you came back to the hospital with a bag of more carbonara in your hand. You couldn’t remember which room was Bella so you asked your mom, and then went to their room. You were outside their door and knocked, and you barely finished knocking before it opened. With your hand in the air, you brought it down and instead brought up your other hand with the bag. “Ready to eat some carbonara?” You giggled and Bella blushed. “Only if you eat it with me.” You nodded. “Deal.” Bella smiled as you walked inside their room, sat down the bag, brought up the food and started eating.

After a while of eating in silence Bella was getting curious and wanted to get to know you better. “Sooo.. do you work or are you still in school?” They glanced at you before shoving food into their mouth. “I work in a coffee shop called ‘A whole latte love’ actually.” Bella stopped chewing and abruptly looked at you. “The coffee shop at the corner of Southbridge street?” You nodded simply at their question. “I live in the apartment building next to it! I always walk past that place on my way home, and every time I see it I think about how much I want to check it out!” they squealed, getting excited. “Woahh.. what if we would’ve met there?” Bella stared at you with a stunned expression on their face. You just shrugged and answered, “Fate works in weird ways, man.” and then kept eating.

You ended up staying much longer than you thought. You had a great time with Bella and they were really sweet. You two got along well, and you thought about visiting them soon again. While you sat on the bus on your way home thinking about them, Bella was laying in their hospital bed at the same time thinking about you.

You two started to hang out a lot. Mostly at the hospital, since Bella wasn’t really allowed to leave at any time. But you still had fun. Bella loved hanging out with their friends, but it was nice to actually spend some time with someone other than a nurse or their friends. They snapped out of their thoughts when they heard the door open. Looking at the door they were hoping it was you that were coming but it was Martha and Vera.

“Hey love. How are you doing? Sorry we haven’t visited as often as we used to.” Martha spoke up as he grabbed a chair from the corner of the room. “It’s alright..” Bella hesitated to tell them about you for a few seconds, but decided to tell them anyway. “I’ve actually met someone.” Both Martha and Vera got an astonished look on their faces. “Who? When? What?” Vera spoke up. “They literally ran into me in the hall.” Bella said while emphasizing ‘literally’. “They ran into you.. and you became friends?” Martha continued to ask. “Yes, and then they bought me carbonara.” Both of the girls next to Bella went ‘aaaah’ with a nod at the same time.

“Okay, then I get it. Makes sense. But is there something going on between you two, what’s their name? Who is it? Spill it.” Vera wiggled her eyebrows at Bella. “Their name is Y/N. And you know that coffee shop at the corner next to our building? They work there.” Bella sighed. “I don’t know if there’s something going on yet, honestly, I really like them, but we barely know each other and I don’t know if they like me. I mean, who would even like me? I’ll probably die before I even get a chance of getting married anyways.” Suddenly the door opened in a rapid move.

“Now why the fuck would you even say something like that you fucking fool!” Every head was turned to the door and there was Isaac. After him came Elsa and Asher. Everyone was silent waiting for an explanation from Isaac. “Sorry, we were eavesdropping.” Asher finally said. “Yeah, I think we understood that part.” Vera expressed with an annoyed tone in her voice. “Okay sorry I could’ve maybeee.. been a little harsh.” Isaac dragged out the maybe as if he was waiting for someone to disagree with him. No one said anything, they all just stared at him with an annoyed face.

“Well anyway. I disagree with what you said. Because you’re not gonna die. And also IF you were dying, you still deserve love, stupid.” Emphasizing the ‘if’ Isaac finally explained what he meant when he barged in. “Why do you always use a degrading word when you’re talking to us? Can’t you ever use a loving word?” Martha waved her hands around in some kind of frustration. “Of course I can, but I don’t want to. I can still be sweet though.” Isaac paused, “I love you all, you morons.” Martha just sighed and put her head in her hands at Isaac’s words while Isaac himself was cracking up by his own words and the annoyance of Martha. “I mean, points for trying.” Asher said and let out a chuckle while shrugging from behind Elsa, who both were still standing by the door.

A few days went by and you were at work. You’ve had to pick up a few extra shifts lately. Texting Bella that you were sorry for the lack of communication but you may be able to come by tomorrow, and ending the text with a cute ‘i miss you’. Bella had been missing you too, maybe too much. Seeing that the text they received was from you, they quickly opened his phone to answer. “It’s okay, but I need carbonara to be able to forgive you.” They sent the text and quickly added, “I miss you more.” you snickered at his response and texted him a quick ‘deal.’

Bella was alone in their room, listening to some music and just laying in bed, thinking. Turning to their side and looking out the window they pleasantly watched the rain fall down outside and hearing the rain hitting the window. Autumn was beginning to set and that made Bella happy, they liked autumn. For Bella it meant a fresh start. It was always a new school year, new classes, hopefully some new friends. But this time there was no school. They should’ve even gone off to college by now, but couldn’t due to their.. situation.

A knock on Bella’s door woke them up from their slumber. They weren't feeling good at all today, and just wanted to sleep the whole day away. You opened the door slowly and peeked inside. “Hi there lovebug. Heard you’re having a rough day. I bought carbonara, should I just put them down and leave?” you took a few steps inside to put down the bag. “No, please stay.” Bella’s hoarse voice spoke out. “Okay, as you wish.” you started to bring out one of the chairs as Bella spoke again. “No, lay down with me, please.” Their voice were barely audible but you could hear it clear as day. “Are you sure?” You hesitated but started to go to them as Bella made space in their bed and reached out their hand. “Please.” they whispered with tears threatening to spill in their eyes.

You laid down beside them and they held you as close as they could. You were laying with your head on their chest and began drawing circles on their arm in a soothing manner. “Please, make the pain go away.” Bella choked out, voice still hoarse and tears slowly going down their cheeks. You sat up on your elbow and looked into his eyes. Bella followed you with their eyes and you were now staring at each other. Bella’s sweet, adorable eyes, the eyes that were filled with love and happiness, were now full with pain and misery. “Oh my sweet, sweet lovebug..” You brought your hand up to caress their cheeks. “I wish I could. I would’ve done anything to make your pain go away.” You were about to shed some tears too but you held back as much as you could. You laid back down and began drawing circles on his skin again as you calmly started to sing quietly to “Lullaby” by Sleeping At Last.

♪

“Goodnight, goodnight, it’s time now to sleep,

The moon’s watchin’ over you and your dreams,

Goodnight, goodnight, my sweet little one,

Tomorrow, your eyes, they will light up the sun.

But goodnight, goodnight, sweet dreams for now,

Drift off to sleep on your pillow of clouds,

Goodnight, goodnight, my sweet little friend,

Tomorrow’s adventures, they will soon begin

Tomorrow’s adventures will soon begin.”

♪

And after a while, you both fell asleep in the arms of each other.

Lucky for you, it was Saturday and you were free. You woke up before Bella, but it was kinda late. Almost 5pm. You were debating if you should wake Bella up or let them sleep, and went for the latter. But you really had to pee though, so you tried to get out of their tight grip on you as smoothly as possible. Your mission was accomplished when you got out of the bed without waking Bella. You went to the bathroom and when you were done you decided to go to the cafeteria to get some dinner. You wrote a quick note for Bella, and left.

When you came back Bella was awake and scrolling on their phone. “Good evening love bug, how are you feeling? I brought dinner.” You set down the food and looked at Bella and gave them a smile. “Better, but I’m feeling a little worn out. But why did you buy dinner? Couldn’t we just eat the carbonara you brought earlier?” Bella sat up with their legs crossed. ‘Oh shit. The carbonara.’ you thought to yourself. “I mean, we could, but I totally forgot about that if I’m gonna be honest. Let’s just eat both options while we play some video games, yeah?” You walked up to Bella and gave them a sandwich and a coffee. “I know that I’m dying, but you don’t have to baby me you know.” Bella said while they stuffed the sandwich into their mouth. “When you stop saying that you’re dying, because you’re not, then I’ll stop babying you.” You sat down in front of Bella and put your feet up on their bed. Bella looked at you with love in their eyes and said, “deal”.

Bella was casually sitting in the lobby for their division of the hospital where they were, well, living. Scrolling on his phone, they suddenly got a call from Martha. “Hey love, what’s up? Can I come by?” Martha's voice rang through his ears as she spoke a tiny bit too loudly for Bella. “Yeah sure. See you soon.” The call was quick, but Bella was happy she was coming to visit. Their friends unfortunately didn’t visit as much these days due to school and work. Bella understood that they were busy but they still wished they could see them as often as they used to before.

Bella and Martha played video games in Bella’s room for a few hours. At some point they had to stop because Bella was getting dizzy. “So.. how’s it going with Y/N?” Martha asked Bella. “It’s going really well, I genuinely think that they actually like me, and I like them. Like a lot. “ Bella started to blush at the thought of you and started fiddling with their fingers. “Okay, that’s really great.” Martha said coldly, having a stiff smile on her face. “What’s up with the face? What are you thinking? Tell me.” Martha sat up straight at Bella’s words. “You know, I just think, maybe don’t go too far with them you know? You know I love you and want nothing but happiness for you, but think about Y/N. You might not actually make it Bella. We all hope you do, but both you and I know there’s a chance and it’s bigger than everyone wants to believe.” Bella’s face filled up with sadness at Martha’s words. “I know I’m being harsh, but all I’m saying is, don’t be selfish. If, only if, you wouldn’t make it through this, you’re gonna break Y/N’s whole heart Bella.”

Bella was still fiddling with their fingers. The tears ran down their cheeks. “I know.” They whispered. Bella knew Martha was right. They had thought the exact same thing before. Even if they often made jokes about dying, they really didn’t wanna fully realize that they actually were dying. “I’ve been holding back because of that. I really don’t want to hurt Y/N, but at the same time they actually give me hope, and I for once feel like it’s worth fighting this, for them.”

You and Bella hadn’t seen each other in about two weeks. You texted them everyday asking if you could come over, but they always declined saying that they weren't feeling great. You knew that they were lying, because you could see on their Instagram that they’ve been hanging out with their friends. Getting tired of being pushed away, you wrote a quick “we need to talk, i’ll be there soon” before sending it to Bella. Bella saw the text immediately and started getting anxious. It seemed to be urgent, so what did you want to talk about?

Arriving at Bella’s floor you went to their room with rapid steps. As soon as you got there you burst the door open and saw Bella getting scared and almost throwing their phone away. They quickly sat up straight and looked at you with a confused face. “We need to talk.” was the first thing you said when you came in the door. “I know, you texted me saying the same thing. Oh and you know, people often knock before they walk into someone's room.” Bella pointed at the door which you didn’t knock on. You shook your head, “Why are you avoiding me?” taking a few steps forward as you were taking off your coat and then hung it over a chair waiting for Bella’s response. “I haven’t. What are you talking about?” Bella has unfortunately never been a good liar, so you could see right through them, also, you had proof because of their Instagram posts. “I saw your Instagram. You told me you didn’t wanna see anyone because you weren’t feeling well. Why didn’t you wanna see me? Did I do anything wrong?” Your voice started to become a little unstable and tears started to well up in your eyes but you tried to hold them back as much as possible.

Bella went quiet and you were just staring at them, waiting for an answer. “Sorry.” Was the only thing they could let out. “Sorry for what? I want an explanation Bella.” You raised your voice and caught Bella a bit off guard. You’ve never raised your voice at them before. “I’m sorry I avoided you. I was scared that we were getting too close, that we were..” pausing and taking a deep breath they continued, “falling in love or something.” Bella spoke in a whisper on their last sentence. You could barely hear what they said. “Why would that be a bad thing?” You were clearly getting annoyed, and Bella could easily tell. They opened their mouth to say something before they closed it again. They didn’t really know what to say. “Because I’m dying Y/N. I didn’t want to be selfish and only think of my own happiness. Because I think you too know there’s a chance I’m not going to make it.” At this point both you and Bella were crying, you had so much to say to them but you didn’t know how to express it. “But you never thought of talking to me about this? How I felt, what I want? Bella, I’m a fully grown person. I knew what I was getting into when I first got to know you and honestly, my heart broke just thinking about you avoiding me and not wanting anything to do with me anymore.” You felt kinda bad for Bella who was practically sobbing by now. It obviously was a hard topic for them to talk about. But you were still kinda annoyed.

“I’m really sorry Y/N.” Before they finished their sentence you started talking again. “And for goodness’ sake stop saying that you’re gonna die! We don’t know that! Even if you are, if you set your mind on it too much, and keep saying that you’re gonna die you’re just gonna make everyone around you miserable. That, if anything, is selfish. You gotta try making the best of the situation.” Bella looked up at you for the first time since you two started talking. “You make my situation better.” Their voice was barely above a whisper, but you heard it. “Don’t you sweet talk me now! I’m still pissed at you! Even if you’re so freaking flirty!” You liked their response and tried to hide it since you were most definitely still mad at them.. definitely still mad. At least you wanted them to think so. “Bella, I understand that it’s hard for you. Shit, you have cancer, it fucking sucks honestly. The only thing I’ve been doing is supporting you and trying to cheer you up. It’s sweet that you feel that I make your days better but I have feelings too. I really like spending time with you but you gotta make some effort for me too.” Bella nodded to your words. “I understand. But we gotta make a deal. I’ll promise to do better if you give me a kiss.” You tried so hard not to break a smile, but you still did. Sighing you started to think it over. “Ah.. Haven’t I done enough for you yet?” you let out a small laugh. “But okay, deal.” You sat down beside Bella and took their hands in yours. You two sat in silence staring at each other for a few seconds, “So are you gonna make the first move or do I have to?” Bella chuckled at your remark and started to lean in. You got tired of how slowly they were leaning in and you brought your hands up to their face to grab it and smash your lips together. You didn’t really make out, but you kissed them for a good minute. “I think this deal is our best one yet.” They said while stroking your cheek and you just laughed at their words. You both laid down to cuddle and after a while fell asleep.

A few months went by and you had spent time with Bella basically every day. You walked down the hall to their room as you did everyday. Opening the door to their room, Bella wasn’t there. You looked around but couldn’t find them. You had brought food, so you put it down to go look for them. Carefully closing the door, you went to the nurse station to ask if they’ve seen them. They didn’t know where Bella was. You started to walk to the activity room where they sometimes would hang out with other patients. As soon as you turned at the corner someone grabbed your face and kissed you out of nowhere. At first you were surprised and annoyed, but as your eyes sprung open in shock you saw that it was Bella and you started to kiss them back. “Surprise, babe.” They mumbles against your lips. You giggled at their antics and you ended up making out. Another patient happened to enter but you both made him promise not to tell the nurses.

Bella had been trying a new treatment recently, and they were actually starting to get better, although they were still waiting for the hospital to find a surgeon. Since Bella was getting better, you had started to spend a lot more time together outside of the hospital. Going to the movies, eating in restaurants, shopping, going on walks and having picnics, meeting Bella’s friends and going to the television workshop. You two actually made a visit to your job too, since you remembered Bella really wanted to go there. But the happiest moments were when you two spent time at the television workshop with their friends. They all loved you so much and even if Bella barely could practice himself, you still made an effort to show support for their biggest passion.

You and Bella were alone in the practice room and were joking around as “Can’t help falling in love with you” by Haley Reinhart came on. Bella instantly stopped what they were doing. “Care for a dance, my love?” They held out their hand to you and you accepted it with a giggle. You two started to slow dance to the song, doing some twirls here and there, but mainly just dancing as close to each other as possible and having eye contact. It was such a romantic and lovely moment until the door spurt open and your heads turned to the door. Standing in the door frame was Amanda who looked utterly disgusted. “I forgot my earphones.” She quickly went to get them and turned around in the door before she went out and closed it, “Please don’t end up having sex in the practice room and I think I speak for everyone when I say that.” With one last weary look, Amanda closed the door. You and Bella just exchanged looks and ended up bursting into laughter after the encounter with Amanda.

You were playing video games with Bella and Wilmer in Bella’s room when it knocked on the door. Elsa who sat behind you went up to open the door. She opened and there stood two nurses, with weird looking smiles on their faces. “Bella!” one of them shouted, Bella’s reflexes worked quickly as they turned their head to where the voice was coming from. You paused the game and you and Wilmer put down the controllers to hear what’s going on. “Hey, what’s up?” Bella said with a confused tone in their voice. “We found a surgeon for you.” Everything went quiet after the nurse spoke. “What? If that’s a joke then I’m moving to another hospital Anna, I swear to god.” With a raised eyebrow Bella pointed at the nurse who apparently was called Anna, who also gave them the news. “I’m not kidding. She’s from Switzerland and we’ve scheduled a surgery as soon as next week on friday.” Everyone was speechless. Isaac was the first one to react. He went up to Bella and gave them a hug while starting to cry. “Did anyone else think that he was gonna do something inappropriate at first or was I the only one?” Wilmer spoke up and everyone agreed before he got a slap on his arm from Martha beside him. “Of course we did but we’re not always supposed to say everything we think!” she whispered to Wilmer .

The days were getting closer to the surgery and Bella was visibly getting more nervous as the days went by. Their parents are now here too for support as they haven’t been able to visit as much as they would’ve liked to. “How are you doing?” You asked Bella as you two were walking in the park. “Are you nervous?” They squeezed your hand before he started talking. “Yes, very much so, there’s literally so many risks with this surgery you know? But, I’m also so thankful for this opportunity, and I have all these amazing people by my side at all times.” They were looking down at the ground as they kept speaking, “So even if I’ve never been this scared in my life, I've also never been this thankful in my life.” You smiled at their words and gave them a quick kiss before you started walking back to the hospital.

The day had arrived. Everyone was really emotional. Bella was pacing around their room waiting for the nurses to go get them. They had earlier met with the surgeon, Livia, and they went through the whole procedure together with Bella’s parents. Everyone was watching Bella pace, their friends, their parents, and you. “Are you sure you shouldn’t sit down and calm down a little Bella?” your voice was hoarse from crying and lack of sleep. They just shook their head and kept on pacing. It knocked on the door and every head in the room turned to the door. No one went to open it. “Someone go open it, I can’t do it!” Bella shouted while waving their hands crazily above their head. Their mom got up to open the door. “Are you ready Bella? We’ll come and get you in 15.” was all the nurse said before she left again. Bella's mom got them to finally lay down after a minute of Bella freaking out. Everyone was hysterically crying and telling Bella how everything is gonna be fine and wishing them luck. You had been waiting for your turn to speak to them and finally you got it. You took both of their hands in yours. “I love you, so so much.” The tears were streaming down your face and Bella brought your hands up to their lips to kiss them. “But I don’t want you to worry, everything is gonna be fine.” Your voice cracked at the last word and Bella giggled. “I know, my love. In the end, everything will turn out alright.” They sat up a little bit to kiss you. “Also, can you bring me carbonara when I come back? I haven’t had it for so long, I would absolutely love to celebrate a successful surgery with some carbonara.” You laughed at them before you answered, “Deal.”

A few minutes later Bella had left and the only thing you could hear was people crying and wiping their noses. After a few hours you and Bella’s parents were the only ones left in the room. Bella’s parents had basically forced the others to go home and sleep since everyone had stayed up all night the day before the surgery. You had to grab some air so you went to buy some carbonara for later. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath when you stepped outside. It was in the middle of summer and the sun was shining. You walked slowly to the restaurant so you could enjoy the weather and think about something else so you wouldn’t spiral. You came back after an hour and set down the carbonara on the table beside you. The only thing left now was to only wait.

At the end of the day, the carbonara never moved. It stood there on the table so peacefully in the background while you were on your knees sobbing as a nurse held you, after receiving the news that the love of your life, had taken their last breath.

♪

“The evil it spread like a fever ahead,

It was night when you died, my firefly

What could I have said to raise you from the dead?

Oh could I be the sky on the Fourth of July?

.. The hospital asked, “should the body be cast?”

Before I say goodbye, my star in the sky

Such a funny thought to wrap you up in cloth

Do you find it all right, my dragonfly?”

♪

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