#or doing art livestreams anymore

[theythemmer]

pov you are about to be knocked the fuck out

[retrogradedreaming]

I need to start thinking of ideas for the prompt list I made to get myself to sketch more in October, but instead I'm drawing self-indulgent comics about cats 😭

[xcziel]

Blondie and Debbie Harry were also the first time most of middle u.s. america heard "rap" music and name-checked grandmaster flash et al.

so here's Rapture

the best song ever made? Well, in 1980 a coked-out Italian producer and a vapid New York society girl made a song about being a mindless hole, for a movie about a male prostitute who gets framed for murder. A few years later Disney approached a novelty musician from the late 50s about making modern music sound like it was sung by cartoon chipmunks for an upcoming piece of direct-to-video shovelware. Then in 2015 someone slowed the cartoon chipmunk cover of the male prostitute song down so the vocals sound normal but it's the instruments that sound fucked up

[jinnirev]

9th member reader would be a fan favourite, getting shipped with every member, and people writing crazy ship fanfiction and art

☆ pairing: ot8 x f!reader

☆ T/W: reader is sexualised a lot, implied non-con somnophilia, Prof x student trope, exhibitionism, sex on livestream, degradation, implied gangbang, spanking

☆notes: dark content ahead, please read trigger warnings before proceeding!

🔞 nsfw under the cut!

you were the one member who every single member got along with, ever since debut. you've never fought with any single one of the members.

which is what caused you to be a fan favourite when it comes to shipping. there would be thousands of fanfiction written about you paired with every single one of the members.

you were scrolling on your twitter timeline, until you stopped when you saw an explicit video with a caption saying: "y/n btm leeknow top, this is a visual representation of what happens whenever y/n fucks up during dance practice." you pressed into the video, a full HD video of a girl getting her pussy pounded, laying on the wooden floor, obviously reminding you of the training room. you hate the admit it, but this did infact happen before, and not just once but several times..

this led to you falling down the rabbit hole of reading and watching sexual fan made content. there were accounts dedicated to describing how good your pussy would be. (you were flattered)

your personal favourites would be those crazy alternate universes where fans would depict the most graphic and vile things.

"y/n would be such a brat during her lecture, not paying attention at all to what mr hwang was saying. showing up to class in an unbelievably short skirt with the tightest tank top, y/n was basically slutting out her body. mr hwang refused to let this slide, asking her to stay behind after class: *insert a video of a girl in a skirt getting railed on a table, getting her ass spanked, leaving angry red hand marks on the soft flesh of her skin.*"

"y/n made seungmin mad while doing a live so he fucked her live infront of over a million people: *insert a video of a girl bouncing up and down a cock, a pair of hands guiding her hips, slamming her down on his cock*"

"thinking abt how creamy and wet y/n's pussy would get during a fan meet when she couldn't get her slutty pussy filled by the rest of the members. so she had to whore her pussy out to the members on stage, they fucked her right there, infront of all the fans."

"y/n would be such a pretty sleeper that roommate!han can never resist touching her when he sees her passed out on the couch. jisung couldn't help but pull down her tiny short, revealing her wet little cunt, all creamy and ready for him to fuck. she let out a whimper of his name in her sleep and jisung gets impossibly harder. he couldn't resist it anymore, pulling out his fat cock and slamming it into sleeping y/n's creamy cunt. her eyes would slowly flutter open, waking up to her pussy getting filled with jisung's cum, clit getting rubbed and pinched by her roommate: *insert a video of a girl laying on her back, getting fucked stupid by a fat cock*"

needless to say, most of them were vile, but made your poor little pussy so wet, you had to start rubbing your clit while scrolling. but you were to used to the members making you cum all the time, you couldn't even take care of yourself :(

you walked into the living room, where the members were all sitting and watching their weekly movie night. "can't cum," you mumble, somehow they all heard you.

all it took were those two words for all of them to turn of the TV and spring into action. not before arguing with each other about who should get to make you cum.

[chaotic-tired-fox]

I want to rant about this because it makes me mad, but I also don't want this whole thing on my blog, so I hope you don't mind me putting it here.

Iskall literally compared cancel culture to a literal witch hunt. Okay, I agree with that. Cancel culture is bad, innocent people should not get hurt from things that aren't true. (Except I also think he is a part of consequence culture. He dug his own grave at this point.)

But the amount of hypocrisy in that statement infuriates me. Because guess what he did? He sent his fans right on over to cancel the hermits.

Anyway, friendly reminder to show your support of the hermits to drown out what this bastard is doing <3

Understandable anon.

A good example of Cancel Culture was with what happened with TFC (rip) a few years back. People dragging up very old statements and trying to make a fuss out of it despite the fact that he clearly didn’t hold such views anymore and was considered a friend of both ZombieCleo and Joehills. That’s cancel culture. And even still he apologised for them and everyone moved on.

What’s happening with Iskall isn’t Cancel Culture, it’s just pure hard fact and although it’s difficult it still has to be accepted as such. Iskall didn’t apologise for any of it nor did he show even a hint of accountability or regret for his actions and he’s been treating people like this for years. Turning his fans on the hermits in some declaration of war was extremely childish.

What we can do now as a community is to continue to support and show love to the hermits. Report any nasty comments you see on their videos, draw fan art, join a livestream and just keep being the amazing community y’all are. We can drown out the hate together.

[bamsara]

I’m a little confused, who is Arson? Did you name your computer that or the program or something like that? Been trying to piece stuff together with all the posts about Arson but I feel a little lost. Like it’s an inside joke that I wasn’t there for the development of it

Rip I forgot new followers are not Aware of Arson

Arson is my laptop. Specifically a laptop sona I made for my laptop because of the sheer amount of trouble I've had with him. Twitch chat started shipping an 'enemies to lovers' between me and my laptop and it was giving me such a hard time during a livestream that it turned into a full fledged oc.

He's a gaming laptop I got in 2018 and had saved up for and while he's very good, his technical service life was only for 3 years and it's been about 5 and a half years since I've had him because I didn't want to replace him.

This means for the last two years he's been progressivly getting worse; starting with the battery going out completely, and then it getting discontinued so I couldn't replace it, the laptop started lagging hard, which I just kinda delt with. Then he's bluescreening a lot, and my files are getting corrupted and disappear. He cannot detatch from the wall so he's not a laptop anymore but really just a desktop now anyway. His model is discontinued so I cant get parts to replace him or have him repaired.

It's a running joke that 99% of all streaming problems are Arson's fault because for no reason he'll just. Crash and critcal error this and bluescreen that.

He got his name because he overheats really badly, and while gaming laptops are built to withstand that kind of heat, it still does wear and tear over time.

It would have been fine for 2-3 years but it's climbing near to 6 and part of the front is melted and I have to turn stream and art off early sometimes to let him cool down because the keyboard has left burns on my fingers. (Though this only happens when using him intensly, like streaming or gaming or art....which is 90% of what I do. The other being writing and work.) (Also before anyone asks, I regularly clean out the fans and I have a cooling stand beneath him)

Currently the top part of his keyboard is not working anymore and he's missing keys anyway. Part of his casing near the charging port is broken off. I've used his heat to cook tiny cookies while I've played skyrim before

TBH If you just search up Arson on my blog you'll see a whole series of posts about him.

he's my guy......my robot.........

[archivedblog16]

my new years resolution is to block everything having to do with vivziepop for the sake of my mental health after being a on and off fan whos stuck it out since 2019, and i think i feel so bad about it, because i still feel this deep sense of injustice at everything viv has gotten away with. im left with all this knowledge of her misdeeds, (the playbill BS where she wouldnt be honest about the delays on twitter, the one website she cant seem to stop using, her near nepo baby origins she lies about, the ghost fuckers millie suicide attempt leak, her lying about hh being delayed because of the 2023 hollywood strikes, the multiple taxidermy peacocks, viv asking her own crew for money for the $5000 lackadaisy producer donation where mel implies it was a "group effort" in a deleted tweet, all the people shes screwed over like dave and ashley and ken and kyra and erin, the recent livestream signing she deleted just a day afterwards for seemingly no reason, the transphobia screenshots even though i KNOW thats her, she posted a discord light mode screenshot with her and sam talking about how no one knew what she meant with that same exact pfp on her twitter after she announced they could finally release queen bee, and now you cant even find it easily because of her privating her twitter,) that i cant do ANYTHING about since fans dont care and youtubers dont care because *lyle lipton voice* Money, and can only hope that when these shows are closer to their end in 4 to 6 years from now, that someone with a platform can talk about this growing pile of evidence that shows that she might not be a great person after all. its just a burden to carry at this point. fan content doesnt make me happy, rewrites dont make me happy, and even critique i AGREE WITH doesnt make me happy anymore, because a majority of people refuse to address the ROOT of these issues due to a "separate the art from the artist" mentality, even though with how much creative control she has over these projects, i think its near impossible to do that. and i do truly think the root of all of them is viv and no one else, im sorry to say, even if that does sound like a personal attack like SC says. (genuinely, why would that be a personal attack? and even if it is, why should i care? since viv is 10 times richer then most people like me will ever be anyway? cant she just turn her phone off and buy herself more things to make her happy and show off on her insta, instead of learning how to make sincere connections like the average person does when they dont have that much disposable income?) maybe people will eventually catch onto this stuff. maybe they wont. but it wont be my problem anymore, and i'll avoid spindlehorse like the plague until i can binge watch everything in one fell swoop, instead of waiting with baited breath for something i know will inevitably disappoint me. but i wish the best of luck to anyone who will stay for the ride into the new year and beyond until it finally ends!

Happy new year! Wait, she lied about Hazbin Hotel being delayed because of Hollywood strikes and her nepo baby experience? Oof. Regardless, you are valid for feeling this way and I don’t blame you for being upset. It might take a while for most people to completely realize Vivziepop’s patterns and behaviors. There are people such as Ayy Lmao who have a big platform will defend Vivziepop.

[nadinescholtes]

Q&A

About sending Asks:

-No NSFW, AI, NFT stuff

-don't send me pictures of your Ocs, it’s very sweet of you to want to show them to me, you are doing great! But my inbox gets easily full of them. Same with if my OCs would meet/befriend your Oc. Don't DM them to me too, they are full!

-I don't do requests! You can always commission me if you want me to draw something for you. Responding with art is something I do on my own.

-If you ask something that was asked already many times I will most likely not respond.

Can I draw or write something about you Ocs or Oc's universes?

Go for it! Just add credits please, and tag or send links to me so I can see them.

Why don't you answer my asks or DM's?

Sometimes Tumblr is weird and Asks just disappear even though my Inbox says there is still something in there, but doesn't show up. My asks or DM's can be too full and it takes time to respond to all of you. Or you ignored my Ask rules.

Do you write fics?

Not really, I do write stories but not in the way you're used to fics. They're like scripts because I write those before I do comics.

Can I repost your art?

No, even if you credit it! You can reblog here on Tumblr or Bluesky. But I will not allow it because of Art theft!

Can I use your TSBS or Laia comics for Dubs?

Sure, but please ask first and use credits! Even if you make a Dub of an already dubbed video of my comics and that creator gives you permission, ASK ME TOO PLEASE! And send me links I want to see it. But don't use comics like Cool Uncle or from other books!

Can I use your art for AI or NFT?

HELL NO!

What is your gender identity/pronouns?

I'm a woman. My pronunciation is she/her, but I'm also comfortable with they/them. (I actually don't care about what pronouns you use for me)

What do you use to make art?

-IMac that is over 10 years old and can't handle much anymore.

-Cintiq UX21 gen2

-Clip Studio Paint

-Krita

Do you do livestreams?

I wish and I tried but my old computer gets easily overheated.

What is your job?

I'm an independent illustrator (but still part job hunting). I draw commissions to pay the bills and hold my head barely above the water. And no I don't earn money with the TSBS comics, they are drawn with the little free time I have. (or in the middle of the night, because I can't sleep)

Did you study art?

Yes, I made my graduation in arts and a bachelor of arts in communication design. But to be honest I learned how to draw on my own.

What books did you work on?

You can find them in my portfolio. I had many book/comic commissions and a few of my own like Cool Uncle.

When will the next page of Cool Uncle come out?

I know, 12 pages are left for me to draw, but commissions come first. And right now I have a strong obsession with TSBS and work on those in my free time, so I will work on Cool Uncle when I have the motivation again.

Are you neurodivergent?

Yup, I have Autism and a learning disability. And other mental health issues I won't go into depth here.

How old are you?

Old...

You have so many websites, which are you most active on?

Tumblr and Bluesky, the others are just for dumping my art, and will most likely not or late respond to the comments and Dm's there.

Do you have Kofi?

Kofi, here you go! I also have a Patreon but I post there rarely...

[katuschka]

Scene One – Lampshade

Jake Kiszka x f!Reader (1st person narrative)

2.541 words

On my bedside table, I have a beautiful art deco lamp. When my lover leaves, he ties a scarf he wore for days on top. And when he’s gone I let my window open just a bit, the gentle breeze sets the scarf on motion, just like the waves in the tempestuous ocean.  Once or twice, I swear, I could smell him in my dreams.

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, intended for adult readers. Any resemblance to real persons is purely coincidental. Also, if you're under 18, go find some other entertainment elsewhere.

Warnings: longing, alcohol consumption, penetrative sex, phone sex and masturbation, sex toys, phantasmagorical dream visions

Taglist

It’s been almost three weeks since I last saw him. I’m trying to convince myself that it’s not that bad, but the truth is that I always start missing him the moment he leaves. It’s a bittersweet feeling. I’m a grown, independent woman, engaging in my daily routines...or breaking them, just to stay sane. 

But, it feels as if a part of my soul got attached to him. It travels with him wherever he goes and I feel it tugging at my insides every now and then. At first I thought it was just a side effect of the early stages of falling in love. I believed that it would get easier with time, but it never did. If anything, it only got worse. 

It’s bearable during the day. My mind’s too preoccupied with my job, thank god. It’s not really much different from when he’s here. I still have my work to do and he’s busy too, until we finally meet at home to share a glass of wine or two. And then we fuck.

That’s why early evenings are the worst when he’s away. The house is just too big, too quiet, and my mind too restless. No sound of the strings being plucked greets me when I get home, no smell of savory dishes waiting for me in the oven or on the stove. I’m too lazy to do it myself, so I just order in, only to be reproached by him later that I’m not taking proper care of myself. My lover does all these things. My body’s spoiled with constant hugs and my cheeks peppered with warm kisses. So, on days like these, this is what his lady misses. 

He knows that, so he tries to call anytime he can. It’s easier in between shows. He makes sure to call me around eight, even when it’s already 3 am where he’s at. Him being a night owl, this has never been a problem. Sometimes it’s just a quick hello to make sure I’m ok. Other times we talk for hours. 

I didn’t expect anything like that today. He might call late or not at all. Probably not at all because today’s show was too important. He wanted me there, but I couldn’t go this time. I had an important project to finish and came home pleasantly exhausted. In a perfect world, we would celebrate our respective achievements together, but this world is not perfect, so I have to content myself with the fact that he is. 

Well, not really, but I wouldn’t change a thing about him. 

So, I just poured myself a glass of wine, climbed in bed early and tried to read, only to find myself checking the Instagram updates constantly. I don’t do it very often, because I’m not really keen on seeing hundreds of women swooning over him, but someone might be streaming the show, and I just couldn’t miss it. 

Before he left, he fastened his scarf on my lampshade. That little piece of fabric is basically marinated in his scent – his strong, yet religiously comforting cologne mixed with the warm smell of him. I made sure to leave both the bedroom door and the window open, to create a slight draft. After three weeks, the scent had already faded a bit, but I still could get whiffs of him while falling asleep. Just like today. The livestream I found ended mid-show, but I wasn’t really paying attention anymore. I could feel my eyelids getting heavy long before the concert ended and without even bothering to turn off the light, I fell asleep with my phone still in my hand. 

Except I couldn’t sleep. The thunderstorm in the distance and the billowing wind kept me awake. The sky was clear when I went to bed, so I couldn’t understand where the clouds came from. It didn’t matter anyway. 

He was here. In my bed, sleeping. The intoxicating scent of clove and incense mixed with his musk wrapped around me like a second comfort blanket. The bedside lamp illuminated his disheveled hair and the clothes he had carelessly thrown over the armchair next to the bed. He was naked and all of the sudden, so was I.

It was our bedroom…and it wasn’t. The southern wall was gone, exposing us to the elements outside. Our garden turned to a stony shore, with the waves of a rough sea crashing upon it. Somewhere in the distance, I could see the storm raging.

I was feeling snug under the blanket, the warmth he elicited sheltering me from everything else around. I reached out to touch him. His skin was warm and dry and I snuggled closer to him from behind, inhaling the comforting aroma of his relaxed, sleeping body. 

He never slept much. Sometimes I wondered how he could function after yet another sleepless night, and the dark circles under his eyes often worried me. But when he did fall asleep, he looked like a baby boy, his full lips slightly parted and his brows turned upwards. A man of paradoxes. He would fuck my brains out just moments after he spoon-fed me pistachio ice-cream. My doe-eyed barbarian. A romantic adventure, but a reptile too. Always offering something new. Just like the sky outside, with the full moon now illuminating the stormy sky. Where did it come from? It was hanging there in mid-air in front of the clouds, so big, so close it seemed that I could reach it with my fingers if I just stepped outside of the room. 

But I didn’t want to. Instead, I slowly swirled around him like a serpent. I could feel him stir, his body responding to mine. It was a silent dialogue. He turned to me and pushed my chin upwards to nuzzle the soft skin behind my left earlobe. I could hear him murmur a prayer, the words of which I didn’t recognize, but I understood it anyway. I could feel his hand travel slowly down my belly, pulling my thighs apart, his palm sliding gently to my pussy and his middle finger slipping in between my folds. It’s been too long… My body reacted immediately. I arched my back and gasped for air as his moistened fingertip glided over my clit in slow circles. He kissed my shoulder and I could feel his parted lips stretch in a smile before he nibbled lightly on my skin covered with goosebumps.

He spread my thighs even more, like the petals of a blooming flower. I felt the weight of his body on mine as he shifted, obscuring my view, silencing the wind, his porcelain face dimming all the celestial lights behind him. He was coming home. 

I cried out when he entered me, grabbing pillows on both sides of my head. He, too, yelped like a puppy, laying his head on my bosom just for a while, to gain his composure. I felt every exhale of his quickened breath on my skin, and enveloped his body with my limbs in a false promise to never let go. 

He started moving inside me and I felt absolutely lightheaded, as if we were floating in an empty void. It got darker with each deep, long thrust until time and space around us disappeared and the only thing that tethered me to reality was the rhythm of his beating heart and the alluring sounds of his raspy moans. We moved together languidly, drunk in love, and the waves of pleasure running through my body intensified with each passing second. My fingernails dug into his skin…so deep until he suddenly stiffened and screamed in pain right next to left ear…

…nooo…at first I couldn’t tell where I was or who I was until the sound of my phone ringing on the pillow next to my head slowly brought me back to reality. I couldn’t believe it. What? Why? I looked at the screen and saw the name of the only person whom I could forgive for calling me right fucking now!

“Jake? Oh, for fuck’s sake,” I breathed out. 

A moment of silence before the man on the other side responded. I must have sounded pre-t-t-y irritated. “Babe? Did I wake you up?” 

Of course you did. What day is it? Oh yeah, it was slowly coming back to me. Madison Square Garden… “What time is it?” I breathed out.

“Almost one am here, your midnight. We just arrived at the hotel a moment ago, I haven’t even had a shower yet, I just had to hear…”

“Urgh,” I interrupted him with a groan, not in a reaction to what he said. My still not fully awakened body was just fighting with my mind as I tried to sit. I was still slightly disoriented and my coochie weeped. “I, uhm, I’m sorry baby. I just had a very intense erotic dream…the first one in years. And you just happened to interrupt it at the worst possible moment.”

“Oh, daamn!” he chuckled. “Who’s the lucky guy?”

“Not funny Jake. No one else but you could ever make me this wet. The sheets below me are literally soaked through.” I heard him inhale sharply on the other side. It took him a few more seconds to respond. “You’re wet?” It sounded a bit like a stifled groan, followed by him clearing his throat. Poor Jake, he was so taken aback by my response that Oliver had to take over. “Thaths probably because I was absolu-te-ly on fire tonight, my love! Telepathy must be one of my many superior powers. Now I need to clean the mess…”

“What do you mean?”

“Phone sex, obviously.” 

I laughed. Nah, I’m not a fan. I love his voice, don’t get me wrong, but it couldn’t possibly make up for all the stuff that my subconsciousness flooded my brain with just a moment ago. Also, I’ve always found the idea of phone sex strangely disconcerting. We could do the most obscene stuff face to face without even batting an eye, but to be describing to him how I’m touching myself? No, thank you. I’d be embarrassed. Don’t know why. That’s just how it is, And that’s what I told him.  

“Oh come on, let’s try it.” Jake was back. “Besides, it’s a mutual obligation now. I’m already hard.” 

I rolled my eyes and took a deep breath. “Ok Jake,” I crooned monotonously, “what are you wearing?” 

“Oh GOD!” he moaned theatrically. “You sound so sexy when you’re bored. Mmmmm.”

I laughed again, in earnest. “Sorry,” I chuckled. “Ok, let’s try it. But I’m not going to describe what I’m doing. You tell me what to do.”

“Deal.”

I heard his sheets rustle as he shifted on his bed, which meant he already had me on speaker, so I did the same. I adjusted the pillows, stripped off my babydoll and tried to find a comfortable position. “Ok Jake, I’m ready.”

“Good girl. Now, close your eyes and cup your breasts. Let your thumbs draw slow circles around your nipples. No pressure.” His voice suddenly sounded huskier than before. 

“Are you jerking off?” And then I heard it. The unmistakable sound of his fist sliding rhythmically up and down his cock. Of course he was. 

“You can’t blame me sweetheart,” he breathed out. “I got here, still full of adrenaline from the show, only to hear you tell me that I was fucking you in your dreams. I couldn’t wait any longer.” 

The sound of his heavy breath made my pelvic muscles contract and my heartbeat quicken. I licked my fingertips and let my hand slide between my legs, trying to ease the ache. “Talk to me Jake. Forget the nipples. Guide my fingers.”

“Who’s impatient now?” He let out an involuntary moan, swallowed harshly and continued: “Squeeze your clit between two fingers, scissor-like. Now rub from side to side and gently pull.”

I knew what he meant. His technique was completely different from mine and effective in its own way. I never tried to recreate it before. I did now, and it all suddenly came back to me. The dream, his touch, his dick, stretching me, fucking me, our loins dancing together to the rhythm of our heartbeats…

“Not enough,” I whined. “I need more, Jake.”

“Ok, time for Mini Me.”

That was yet another thing my lover did for me. We found a company that makes custom dildos using castings of real customers. Now, a cold piece of silicone can never compete with the real jake, but it was the next best thing whenever I needed to release the tension after a long day. I loved the shape of it. It was mine. I opened the drawer and reached for the toy. “Now what?”

“Ride me,” he groaned. 

“How am I supp…”

“Let’s pretend we fell off the bed.”

“What?”

“Off the bed! Now!” he commanded. I climbed off the bed and attached the dildo to the wooden floor. “Mini Me’s ready. What now?”

“Now sit.”

I did as I was told. I got on my knees, placed the tip between my folds and slowly slid all the way down. Our roles reversed for a brief moment as I was now guiding him through. I heard him spit into his palm and groan with relief. It was his time to take the reins again. “Move,” he rasped. “Grab your hips and pretend it’s me. Set the pace, but tell me.”

I started moving my hips in a slow, sensual rhythm, while whispering up and down and up and down to him. I was now close to my bedside table, the fragrant scarf only a few feet from me. I closed my eyes. The illusion was almost perfect. 

“That’s my girl,” he moaned. “Do you want to go faster?”

“No, this is fine.”

“Ok, continue baby. Let me hear you.”

We continued like that for several minutes, eyes closed, listening to each other. I could hear that he was close as his low moans turned to high-pitched whimpers. My thighs started shaking and I had to catch hold of the bedside table to ease the tension in my legs. I opened my eyes and that’s when I saw it. The multi coloured lampshade. As I was moving, so were the colorful lights before my eyes. It was like being there, under the stage lights, as I was listening to my man. The most beautiful song. It overwhelmed my senses and I came, screaming. From the haze of my own high, I heard him finish shortly afterwards. 

I wanted to hear every detail of his show, and he wanted to know about my project, but we were both already too exhausted, so he promised to call me again in the morning. I knew he would, because that’s what my lover does. 

@its-interesting-van-kleep @takenbythemadness @edgingthedarkness @writingcold @ignite-my-fire @klarxtr @jakekiszkasbuttsweat @fleet-of-fiction @lvnterninthenight @myownparadise96 @GVFstuddedmajesty @josh-iamyour-mama @jazzyfigz @sanguinebats @thewritingbeforesunrise

[justabirdy]

Let's Talk About 2024, 2025, This Page, and A Birdy

Well I think it would be fair to say that this past year has not gone remotely like I had planned or hoped it would. 

2024

A year ago, I was comfortably employed in a somewhat lonely corner of Wisconsin. There were rumblings of anxiety about my job but I was hopeful they would pass. 

They did not.

I ultimately started updating this page because things at work continued to degrade and I wanted to build some income while passing along a love for backyard birdwatching through the livestream. I still deeply miss that livestream and would love to set it up again one day because it was such a fun project for me and being able to watch birds anywhere I was also provided a sense of peace and wonder even as my job situation crumbled beneath me. 

But the job continued to crumble and soon I was left unemployed and unhoused. The livestream had to end and all my stuff was packed away. I'll be honest, I spent most of the summer kind of drifting without a goal. I applied to hundred of jobs in my field of work, made it to finalist positions for roughly 30 of them... and landed not a single one. 

So I spent my free time doing digital art, picking up leathercrafting again and trying new stuff. It was a true breath of fresh air to explore my creative side. But the job situation was also a huge stress and it quickly became apparent that I needed to leave Wisconsin if I had any hope of finding work. 

So I did. I landed a temporary job just doing customer service to help pay some bills and moved across the country to Seattle. I left most of my belongings behind and moved into a dear friends spare room for minimal rent. 

Fall and winter of 2024 have been spent mostly working, getting settled in the area, job hunting, being rejected even more from job opportunities, and meeting some of the best people I've ever known and a sense of community I have been craving for a long time. It's been a long and arduous year.

So What Now?

With 2025 here and no new job prospects to really show for it, my temporary, customer service job is coming to a close. I'm still not sure what I'm going to do in the long term, but for now, it looks like I'm starting a leathercraft business. At the very least I'm hoping to continue to make some money to support the fact that my income is so unstable right now. Though I love working on leather and I would love for this to get enough support that I could rely on it more consistently and continue making cool leather pieces for people.

I'm still looking for other work, but I'm coming to terms with the fact that my work in outdoor and environmental education may be done. The career I spent 10 years building just may not want me anymore. Still not sure how I feel about that, but at least I'm processing it. 

About This Page and Those Supporting It

My tumblr has been pretty quiet recently. Admittedly its just been hard to feel community here wile I try to navigate the upheaval in my life elsewhere. I don't plan on leaving but the things I post will continue to change as I try to find a new niche to settle into.

I'll still keep updating here as I can! Hopefully I can get in the habit of updating here even more since I already have some leather projects in the works that I want to share though I will likely be more actively updating on my Kofi shop and my bluesky as those are just easier for me to update regularly.

I hope you all will keep supporting me as I know I am going to need it now more than ever once this job contract ends. I know the topic of posting has changed a lot since this page really started, but I hope its still interesting and worth keeping track of or even trying some of my leatherwork. 

Thank you all for all the support so far and here's to surviving another wild year that 2025 is already shaping up to be.

[gabessquishytum]

CEO Dream is a camboy, he wears a mask and does it for stress release; merger company CEO Hob is one of Dream's best clients.

For a number of reasons, CEO Dream Endless needs to relax. He's been running the family business since he got out of school. It's not the original path he wanted to take (even doing his art doesn’t really relax him anymore), but he's good at it and the business is doing well.

When he was in school, Dream might have relaxed by being a camboy. He developed a strong following and a number of high-spending clients. He was always masked and at best people who watched his feed saw his raven tattoo (but since CEOs aren't naked in board rooms, no one sees the tattoo anymore). But he was free to follow directions and show off and get off for his internet "friends". He had one regular, RG, who gave the best "instructions".

When he agreed to take over running the family business, he shuttered his website and just stopped responding to chats and emails. There are times he misses it and RG. But it's been years.

Still, Dream is so stressed right now. The company is merging with the Gadling organization. The merger is a good thing, but he wants to change the organizational structure and continue working with Gadling Org CEO Robert Gadling, Jr, Hob. It is nerve-wracking. Dream has never had to share governing responsibilities, but Hob has good ideas for where to take the company that shouldn't be lost. Hob is so smart and fun. But Dream's getting so much push back from the family.

He just needs to RELAX.

Again, it's been years, but Dream just can't not - he'll reopens his cam site,,,,just for him; just this once. There is no way that any of his regulars (RG) would still be around. Besides he's older now, not the same twink he was when he first did it.

When the notification popped up that Raven was livestreaming. Hob couldn't believe it. That beautiful boy dropped of the face of the earth a few years ago. Hob was devastated when it happened. One minute Hob was spending every bit of money and free time he had glued to his computer watching a sex demon angel perform his every wish, the next nothing.

Hob kept up his "RG" moniker and subscription notification for the site active on the hoped chance that his beauty came back. So the notification was a welcome surprise, but it's been years.

What could the reactivation from the site even mean.........

Oh, god! Raven was older, but still so beautiful. Hob was again in so much trouble.

Oh, so SPICY.

For a while, everything is normal for Dream and Hob. The merger is running smoothly, they're working well together and troubleshooting the issues that crop up quite easily. And for Raven and RG, things are going well too. Raven keeps streaming intermittently and he's THRILLED to see RG pop up and message him every time. No one seems to mind that Raven isn't quite so skinny and wide eyed as he used to be. In fact he gets more compliments that ever.

And perhaps the two words would never have collided. But then, Hob and Dream find themselves together, working very late. There's a big deadline for a project coming up and a few complications have come up, so they've decided to work into the early hours and just get the issues solved.

Until Dream upends a pot of cold coffee down the front of his shirt. Sleep deprivation be like that. He has no choice but to take the shirt off, and it's soaked into his undershirt too so that has to go... and he doesn't notice that Hob is staring until its too late. The raven tattoo on the left side of his ribcage is fully on show.

Hob clearly recognises it. His eyes are so wide it's almost comical. Dream feels his face during deep, deep crimson and he starts sweating hard. He never, ever imagined that this would happen.

"If it makes it any better, I'm very much a long term fan." Hob whispers. "You probably wouldn't recognise it but my screen name is RG."

Oddly enough, that makes it a lot better. Suddenly Dream isn't thinking of jumping out of the window into the street below. All he can think about is everything he's ever done for RG - all the time he's edged himself and begged for relief, all the times he's fucked himself on dildos and watched RG say the prettiest little thing I've ever seen, such a sweetheart, aren't you a good boy for me? In the chat.

Hmm. Maybe the project can wait until a more reasonable hour of the day. Because the truth is, Dream can see the bulge in the front of Hob’s nice work slacks, and he's not going to think about anything else until it's inside him.

Get ready for a Raven x RG collab, coming soon...

[poppyseedqueenz]

(Hopefully Final)Update On the owonekko situation:

Okay so just today the situation has reached its peak so a few hours ago Nondi has worsened this whole mess by making a follow-up response to not only Jouusta but to her critics AND her fans as a WHOLE and let's just say it's probably WORSE than her first response

How did she Respond? Did she apologize? Is she taking a break? Did she realize her mistake?

Well.....

Okay I'm not gonna hold back

Nondi This is the Most NASTIEST, IMMATURE, RUDEST, DISRESPECTFUL Thing that I have Ever Seen! Where do I even start?? Lets start with the fact that whole Animatic low-key ridiculous not only is the whole thing lowkey disrespectful to EVERYONE involved with the portrayal of Jo, Her Critics, HER FANS. But this video is anything BUT respectful! She went silent for almost 5 to 10 days after her Livestream only to make an EVEN worse response not only that but the fact That now she's trying to turn the whole thing into a race issue when race was NEVER even mentioned by Jo or anyone EXCEPT Nondi! Nondi was the ONLY one who said anything about her skintone but now I'm starting to realize something

At this point this isn't even about the AI anymore Nondi is just being a straight-up bully and slandering Everyone involved specifically Jo painting her in a TERRIBLE TERRIBLE Light(whilst now Nondi fans are also now sending Jo hate comments and a few were DEATH THREATS)

Not only that but in the description to her animatic not only is she "Not sorry" she made a lengthy doc(and yes I read every single word) where she fails to take accountability and passes blame onto the critics and Jo and making excuses for her behavior and adding extra things that are half-true, not relevant to the situation, gaslighting fans, and downright lies of which she claims is the "truth"

Nondi's Doc:

Let me remind that after Jo's video went up she made a Pinned Comment and made a few edits to it when Nondi's livestream went up This is What she Said:

Jo's Pinned Comment: "EDIT (9/12/24): Thank you to all who have let me know about Nondi’s most recent livestream and livestream thumbnail. I have not watched the full VOD, but I have seen the thumbnail and… obviously, I am not okay with it. Not in the slightest. That being said, it’s very clear to me that she’s having a mental health episode of some sort. I’m hoping after that livestream she’ll take some time off the internet and not entertain this controversy anymore. I’m disappointed with her actions, with her portrayal of me, and with how she’s handled everything, but at the end of the day I want her to be mentally well, and I feel bad that I contributed anything to the deterioration of her mental state. I still stand by everything I said in this video. I still think she’s wrong for misgendering the larger creator (and continuing to justify it). But I think this will be the last thing I’ll say regarding this video and OwONekko. If anything else happens, I’m not gonna address it (unless I feel like I REALLY need to). Again, don’t go and harass Nondi. Don’t be nasty to anyone. Take care of your mental health too. . . . . . . . . A few more notes here! I changed the title of this video from “How to Lose an Audience’s Trust - OwONekko’s AI Art Stance and How it Harms Artists” to “OwONekko’s Generative AI Stance and How it Harms Artists” because I felt like that was a more concise and less offensive way to market the video. I also want to say I do NOT think Nondi is a bad person for using and liking AI for the reasons she does, I just disagree with her reasons, and I should have been more clear about that. She’s entitled to her opinion about AI as much as I am entitled to mine. I may go here or on my insta to say a few more things regarding this situation if anything else happens, but I’m not going to make any more video content because I don’t want to egg on the people that have been relentlessly harassing Nondi because of my video. Genuinely, I feel awful about that. If you have anything to say about this discourse, keep it on MY video and off of her twitter/ Youtube page. She’s seen all the arguments, criticism, and nasty shit that’s out there. I may have criticized her for blocking certain users in my video, but at this point I think that course of action is 100% justified. If I had known this video was going to be shown to over 200,000 people in less than 48 hours, I would have been a lot more clear and less reactive with how I expressed things in this video. I’ve never had a video perform like this one did.. like, genuinely, I thought this would be watched by the people already in this discourse and MAYBE just a few others. It was not my intention to bring so many new eyes to her channel, especially in this light, but that’s what happened. As for the transphobia claims, she says it was an accident and will not repeat this mistake going forward. She hasn’t apologized for misgendering the creator, which I absolutely disagree with, but she’s made it clear she doesn’t stand by what she originally did. (that being said, I am not trans or queer, so whether or not you want to support her for this going forward is completely up to you. Just don’t go and be a bother to her.)(edit: she has continued to justify her misgendering the larger creator so idek anymore) I’ll edit this comment if I have anything else to add, but for now that’s all I have to say."

I am 100% on Jo's side of the drama

Jo said that nondi was entitled to her opinion and was not calling her bad in ANY WAY Jo was rightfully upset about how nondi portrayed her in the Livestream(she hasn't seen the Animatic yet) and for some reason nondi and her die-hards decided to attack her when Jo just made a harmless statement and even said not to harass anyone at the VERY beginning of her video plus she Cannot be blamed for who saw the video she is not in control of what the algorithm shows us as she said that her intended target for the video were people who WERE actually aware of the situation WITH the exception of a FEW new eyes NOT 200,000(now 400,000) new eyes and she did apologize for that and I do agree if people did not watch Nondi's ai stance video and then Jo's video(even though jo DID say to watch Nondi's video first to get the full context)

(Note: I watched Nondi's full ai stance video before Jo uploaded hers) and just saw Jo's video(depending on how much you watched of Jo's video) and just relentlessly attacked nondi are also in just as much of the wrong telling her to "Kys" is not helpful and making her more stubborn and while I don't agree with her deleting comments that DO know the full story those critiquing her with no context are 100% justified beacuse context is EVERYTHING however Nondi's reactions and responses are NOT justified whatsoever she is a GROWN ASS WOMAN who knew DAMN WELL what's she's doing especially when she went live with that slander video, Twitter posts and even TODAY'S video and the fact that people are still defending what she's done are also the problem she is not the victim she is the perpetrator and when other people did what she's done now they were called crazy, were ridiculed or nearly lost or DID their careers entirely)

The last time a rapper(Doja Cat) made a post disrespecting her fans the same way nondi did she lost almost 200,000 followers

When this rapper(Nicki Minaj) went on a whole Twitter rampage and a crazy rant on IG live beacuse of Hiss (by Meg Thee Stallion)(in this case Nondi went on A coke rant on YT live)she was called a fucking cokehead

When this youtuber(Colleen Ballinger) made a video pinning blame on the internet for banding together, calling her out on her predatory behavior and made a ukulele musical as a response(in Nondi's a fucking snl skit) her response was seen as the worst youtuber apology/statement videos to date

(Note: this is not an attack on Nicki, Doja nor Meg as I love and respect all 3 of these artists however I can't say the same thing for Colleen as she is a terrible human being)

And while people are saying "omg the art community is so sensitive" and you know what? You're right the art community can get sensitive over everything and anything but that that's not the case people are rightfully upset at nondi she montitezed her ai Playlist Made by a company who's under fire for stealing unauthorized audio and using it but now she's attacking fans and critics who were trying to tell here what she was doing was WRONG

AI is a dangerous practice and a very controversial topic that is threatening not only art but jobs in general if ai was not being trained on stolen work and being seen as a replacement then maybe I would have a different opinion the problem is its not being seen as a tool but as a REPLACEMENT for human artists whist stealing art from them and creating entirely new images for the stolen work and people keep Making excuses for ai if "get with the times" mean I have to just let ai steal my work then I rather be left behind

And when I was looking at Nondi's Doc she keeps using race(she used are a total of 3 times even again race is NOT the problem and the fact that your using the race card is downright sickening and this is coming from a black person) and she tried to make Jo look like the bad person and acting as if what she's doing isn't overreacting guess what nondi You ARE overreacting and this Animatic and doc is proof and the way you responded has just made things worse you could've used that short hiatus to reevaluate or make a statement no one asked you to apologize for the A.I video but for the misgendering, the hateful comments and to Jo but instead you make 2 videos(one of them being a YT live) and slandered many people(even though you said you don't like bigger platforms using their influence to harm others) she is becoming the thing that she doesn't want to be and it's sad and the fact that fans still defend and fight tooth and nail for her just proves how ignorant these people are critics will critique ANYTHING, EVERYTHING and EVERYONE that should be common knowledge if you become a content creator or a public figure(such as a celebrity, influencer or musician) if you can't wrap your head around that then content creation isn't for you She is a GROWN woman who went on a two-year old rampage over a controversial topic

Remember the reason all of this is happen is beacuse she got pissy over ONE comment and she's using her race as a sheild

This isn't a RACE issue this is an ETHICS issue and she's treating it like some Anti-Black Campaign

Nondi This is Unacceptable

Leave the internet or take a hiatus beacuse this is too far

[velvet-games]

I wrote a random draft for a radiostatic ficlet on the car a couple days ago; still having problems with it but might publish to ao3 if it gets better.

for context, this is part of the same universe as favorite/most of my art. vox leaves the vees and is working at the hotel now; he and alastor have repaired their friendship at this point and are hurtling toward that liminal queerplatonic "what are we" stage.

“Oh, this hotel venture truly has been an inspiration, hasn’t it, Vox?” Alastor twirled around Vox’s office, nearly smashing his screen in with the microphone several times. “Romance, betrayal, existential revelations about the ontology of the universe; it has everything!”

“You say that like you’re not part of the romance, betrayal, and existential revelations about the ontology of the universe,” Vox said, narrowly missing another hit. 

“Oh, I don’t mind being a part of the show! I play the best character after all, haha!” Alastor finally set the microphone down, much to Vox’s relief. “I’ve never felt the rivers of creative ambrosia flow through my veins quite the way they do now! Every broadcast has been a hit!” Raucous applause permeated the air, occasional whoops breaking through. He gave one more twirl and a bow that almost caused him to topple over. Vox smiled faintly. Silly, he thought.

“Glad you’re having fun, buddy; now can I get back to work?” Vox sighed, feeling a little sick. He sat heavily in his chair before turning toward the wall of screens currently dotted with shining logos and random livestreams. 

The applause cut off abruptly. “Hm? Why, friend, you look even bluer than usual,” he said. “Say, why don’t you start drawing again? That used to cheer you right up. It’ll be just like old times! Me, inspired to orchestrate the best broadcasts Hell has ever seen; you, with your mediocre pictures that made you ever so happy for some inexplicable reason!”

Vox froze. “I … can’t.”

“Sure you can; why not?” Alastor replied steadily. “You used to do it all the time.”

Vox looked up, shoulders tense. “Alastor, that was decades ago.” His voice was quiet and monotone, like it was trying to avoid any spots that may contain emotions.

“You started tinkering again.”

“That’s different.”

“How so?”

“It just is.”

The static in Alastor’s voice dimmed, and he pulled out a pen. “Just try.”

Vox stared at it blankly. “... What if I can’t do it anymore? What if I’m bad at it?” Alastor had to lean in to hear him.

“Then be bad at it.”

“You literally make fun of me for being bad at things all the time. You called my ‘pictures’ mediocre 30 seconds ago.”

“Is your ego really so fragile?" Alastor sighed. "I won’t make fun of you this time.”

“Why not?”

“This is different.”

“How so?”

“It just is.”

Vox shook his head, voice finally cracking and filling with static. “It’s gone, I can’t … it’s not – I’ll just know that I failed. That I let myself lose it.”

Vox tried to turn away, but Alastor gripped the sides of his screen and pulled his face close. “Or you could find it again. You could find that part of yourself and the world and remember what it feels like to be alive. You’ll be alive, even here. How will you know if you don’t put pen to paper?” Alastor’s eyes shone. “I’ll do it with you.”

Vox laughed abruptly, voice wet. “You suck at drawing. And you hate being bad at things.”

“I was terrible at everything before I was good at them,” Alastor said. “I’ll be bad at things for you. We can be bad at it together. We can love it together.”

Vox’s face wobbled a bit. He took the pen. “Okay.”

****

The first few sketches sucked ass. After that, it was like Vox had never stopped. 

Alastor looked up from his shaky doodles of Niffty and a woman with a scar on her cheek. “You’re only drawing me.”

Vox felt his screen heat up. “I like drawing you.”

“Of course; I’m a lovely muse. But you should check if anything else is interesting.”

Sharks were pretty interesting. But after filling a page with hammerheads and a Blahaj plush, Vox went right back to Alastor: those big doe eyes, the curve of his slightly upturned nose, the curl that always covered his cheek …

Alastor glanced over again, but he only smiled softly this time. His doodles were starting to include a little box with antennae and shark teeth. 

****

“FUCK!” Vox yelled from the other room. 

“What is it, darling?” Alastor called. He set his book on the coffee table. 

Vox stomped into the lobby with a rolled up sleeve and the biggest frown Alastor had ever seen. “I think I gave myself carpal tunnel. Some-fucking-how.”

Alastor blinked. “You’ve been drawing in your room for at least four hours a day every day for the last three months. You’re also never fully charged because you refuse to let that interfere with your sixteen-hour work days. You really didn’t expect sickness or injury?”

“I–” Vox looked genuinely indignant for a moment before his eyes went unfocused, probably checking the footage of himself drawing he had stored. “O-Oh. But I meant, like, I forgot this body even had a median nerve that could get fucked up.” Alastor shrugged, and Vox flopped unceremoniously onto the couch. “What now?”

“Well, I’m afraid there is more to life than drawing. You should join my broadcast tonight; we can discuss your woes in detail.”

“Ugh, shut up. You’re just as grumpy when your voice gives out and you have to pretend you have a super important emergency errand instead of admitting you sound like you’ve been smoking since age five.”

“That wasn’t a no.”

Vox frowned again. “Mmmmgghhhhhhhhfine. But you’re learning to paint next time you lose your voice.” 

The broadcast went well that night. 

-----

oh, the woes of loving something and getting really good at it and other people expecting you to be good at it and then getting distracted by other things and losing that skill and feeling like you've missed out on your potential but also thinking about it puts a pit in your stomach because every day you wait to start doing it again the more your skill deteriorates and maybe it's not worth it to start again at all but you miss it so much and it used to be a part of you and maybe now you're missing a part of yourself--

anyway. I think my biggest worry rn is about the pacing + vox/alastor's voice. I keep forgetting what vox's voice sounds like, and I kept imagining alastor's pilot voice, which is maybe a little too unhinged for this fic lol.

[dalekofchaos]

Okay, I watched the DE livestream and even with my justified complaints before, I am most definitely not playing this game.

it feels like they killed any chance of Chloe, Warren or anyone from Arcadia Bay of appearing.

There was a dialogue option of Din- I mean Safi asking about "the girl with the blue hair"

And a dialogue choice appears between "We were just friends" "We were high school sweethearts"

"WERE" Are you fucking kidding? They said they'd respect both endings, but How the fuck is it "were" when they said they will respect both endings.

Sacrificing an entire town, killing nearly all of your friends and your love's mother is not "high school sweetheart" WHO FUCKING WROTE THIS SHIT?

Now this could've just been someone who chose the "save the Bay ending" in the livestream, but Max would not leave Chloe if that were the case...

Looks to me like they wanna split Max and Chloe even in the timeline where Chloe is alive. There probably will be just short mention of her or at best short cameo but that's it.

Like if they are no longer together/friends what would be even the point of Bae ending.

The idea that she'd leave her behind after destroying an entire town to save her doesn't really validate the ending. It just seems like a cop-out for a story that originally went with the Bay ending as canon.

As for the Bay ending. I doubt Warren will get a mention. Maybe a "There was this boy I liked, but it didn't work out because I just couldn't get over the loss of my friend and my own trauma, I didn't want to burden him, so I left. He deserved better than me." or worse, they'll demonize him and paint him how the fandom perceives him. I doubt Kate will get a mention. Maybe Max and Kate do stay in touch but they don't show Kate anymore, because god fucking forbid we get people we actually wanna see.

A lot of what made the first game so likeable is completely lost here, the art style, the ability to rewind freely, Max and Chloe's relationship/friendship. This feels more like a fanfic with a bunch of mediocre OCs shoved in than an actual sequel.

The majority of people who wanted Max back are those who also wanted Chloe back. It's going to be very surprising if they attempt to make it seem like Max and Chloe just lost touch or were just casual crushes in school. That isn't how the original game is at all.

Between this and the devs saying Max wants to forget and leave her past behind I’m taking this as confirmation that Chloe, Warren or anyone else from AB isn’t appearing at all which is pretty upsetting.

Zero interest in the game if they go this route. They should have just made a new character instead of completely shitting on Max' original story while using her for name recognition only…

Just remember. Deck Nine was outed for protecting a bigoted groomer and did nothing as a fucking Nazi put white supremacist imagery in their games and they so happen to release a game with "Max" in it. A Max without Chloe, Warren or Kate. A Max who learned nothing and fucked over reality over someone she just met. They got caught with their pants down and they slapped Max's name and voice on a completely new character because they panicked.

Anyways, I choose to believe MY Post LIS 1 headcanons or my Save Rachel game pitch, because that's how DONTNOD wanted it to be, a story we could choose after the game was complete.

I don't know who DONTNOD thinks this is, because that's not Max Caulfield #notmymax

[suzuran777]

Lamento stageplay news + visuals

Just one more day left until the live performancs of the Lamento stageplay start! The stageplay was of course already announced last year, but as they finally started tweeting the countdown pictures, I wanted to write a blog post about the visuals and information they've released so far, comparing some of the stageplay visuals to the official game illustrations!

Similar to the DRAMAtical Murder (DMMd) and sweet pool stageplays, the Lamento stageplay will also have different routes for each main character, Asato, Bardo and Rai. I'm going to assume that the first half of the stageplay will be some kind of common route, while the second half focuses on the route of each different character. Something that is new is that this time the stageplay will have "musical elements" as well, so I'm not sure if I should call it a stageplay or a musical (I'm just using "stageplay" this time as the official account also seems to call it that). Even though in the game Konoe's song is just a melody, the actors did tweet about singing, so I am curious what they will do!

Ohyama Yoh, who composed 19 of the 37 songs of the Lamento original soundtrack also tweeted that there will be 11 new songs (+ addictional background music). I think it's super cool that they're working together with the original composer again to create new songs for the stageplay! I remember the DMMd stageplay also had a new song by GOATBED, which they even performed live a few times at the end of the show. The previous stageplays were about two hours long, but this time they mentioned it will be at least 3 hours, which makes sense because Lamento is a lot longer than sweet pool and DMMd.

I'm really impressed by the costumes and wigs so far, the ears and tails also look so fluffy... I really wonder what they will look like in motion and what the battle scenes will look like. Most of the visuals of the individual characters they've released so far seem to be based on the in-game sprites, but what I found interesting is that Rai's, Asato's and Bardo's pictures seem to have the same pose as the Kotobukiya figurines! You can see the comparison below, the pictures of the figurines are from the Kotobukiya official website.

Another new visual which was released quite recently seems to resemble another official illustration, which I've seen in the artbooks before and which was also the cover of magazine B's Log, specifically the December 2006 issue. Some of the details are a bit different, for example Konoe is not holding Leaks' mask in his hand anymore, and this time they added Shui to the illustration as well, but some other things such as Bardo's pose make it quite obvious this picture was their inspiration. The way Shui and Leaks stand next to each other kind of reminds me of the Rhapsody to the Past drama CD as well? One thing I noticed is that they're not really trying to hide Leaks' face this time, which was actually quite a big reveal in the game.

Next are some of the other illustrations they recently showed us during a short livestream which was available on Twitter for a limited time. Luckily they also posted the pictures on the official account! These won't be sold as merchandise, but they're given away as a bonus for those who attend all three versions of the show. I guess one thing I never noticed before is how little promotional/extra art Bardo got back then, so in this case they had to use one of his in-game CGs. For the other characters they mostly seem to use some of the extra/promotional art. Anyway, you can see a comparison below! I think it's fun to see how they re-created the pictures with the actors.

The last picture they recently showed during the Twitter livestream uses the cover illustration of the official world guidebook! Unfortunately no Bardo in this one either. This is one of the items they are selling as merchandise, it seems to be some kind of booklet (they call it a "pamphlet" but it's 32 pages long). I really wish they would sell the merchandise online, but for now it's only accessible for those who have a ticket and who buy it inside the venue. Maybe if they have any extra stock they might sell it online?

Update: The stageplay will also be livestreamed on DMM TV! The ticket to watch all three routes is 10000 yen (about 66 USD, which is cheaper than the in-person tickets at least!) which also gives you some special bonus videos to watch. First is Bardo's route on February 24th, followed by Asato's and Rai's routes on February 25th. Be aware that it is region locked and not all VPNs work, so unfortunately I can't help much with that! For any further updates you can check the official Twitter account!

Cast list: Konoe: Maejima Yoh Rai: Kato Sho Asato: Hiraga Yusei Bardo: Seto Yusuke Razel: Kimisawa Yuki Kaltz: Okamoto Yuki Verg: Iwata Tomoki Froud: Muramatsu Koki Kagari: Asaba Maya Tokino: Fukuzawa Taiga Firi: Kita Tsutomu Kil: Yoshun Sakamoto Ul: Arai Yuya Shui: Osaki Natsuki Leaks: Matsui Yuho

[mike-dragon]

I Need a Game Over (Short Vent)

As the days go on the more and more I come to believe that my only purpose in this world is to be a servant to the will of others and give up on all of my needs and wants and just quietly accept everything that is imposed upon me. Just about a week go I was forced to give up livestreaming and for the past couple weeks I couldn't do anything but to dedicate basically 24 hours of the day to the care and aid of my elderly father. Absurd amounts of stress and financial distress surely are not helping either, and with each new day that goes by, I more and more am convinced that unless I manage to move out and live alone, away from my family, the more likely it is that one day I may cause my life to end early, for as I have already exposed on a long Journal on my Deviant Art (https://www.deviantart.com/mike-dragon/journal/I-Don-t-Want-to-Play-Anymore-1028684784) a few days ago, I already wish I'd go to sleep one night and simply never woke up again. Right now I literally cannot even get a s#itty job to earn some money because I am the one who has to take care of my dad. Make no mistake, I love him, but I am now living even less than I was before.

I have so much on my mind that I had to give up streaming and can't even finish the ONE commission I got nearly over a year ago. I also made an account on Ko-Fi (https://ko-fi.com/mikedragon) for I intended to set up some kind of shop, but not even that I can get off the ground, for everything and everyone around me force me indirectly and directly to literally bury all my plans deep down and forget about them.

I'm telling you, I'm tired. And I am still too young to be this tired of trying.