#or at least if they do have them be fun enough that it's fine

[schrodingers-romy]

Heaven Works on Borrowed Time [Karasu Tabito x Reader]

Pairings: Karasu Tabito x GN!Reader Word Count: ~1200 [Ao3 Link]

Summary: Two people escaping an office party have a first meeting under the stars

Warnings: no gendered pronouns/language used for reader, reader doesn't like their job and is kinda bitter about it, discussion of the fermi paradox, karasu-typical tacky nickname, pre-relationship

Notes: very pointless little convo between crow boy and reader but I thought it was fun. title from fermi paradox by avenged sevenfold bc i think i'm funny

You sighed into the night air, relaxing as the late breeze cooled your heated face. Office parties sucked. You were glad you were able to sneak away from you drunk, overly friendly coworkers, and find yourself some peace.

Your jaw had just finished unclenching when the door behind you clicked open, bringing with it a rush of sound from the party inside before it swung back shut.

So much for your peace.

“Didn’ know anyone else was out here. Hope ya don’t mind me intrudin’,” said the newcomer.

“’S fine,” you said, even if you wanted to scream a little.

You recognized the voice; Karasu Tabito, who worked on the floor above you as part of the company’s legal department. You never really interacted with him, aside from including him in a few email chains; if you didn’t know he was friends with Otoya Eita, you wouldn’t have an opinion on the man at all. However, considering you did know Otoya (both by his reputation for dating or hooking up with half of the office and cheating on at least an unlucky third of them, and because he tried to hit on you during your first joint meeting), your opinion on Karasu leaned towards the negative. Still, you didn’t need any more rumors of your snappishness circulating, so you didn’t kick up a fuss at sharing the balcony with him. You would be making your excuses to leave soon anyways; you had been there for over an hour, which was enough to say you had socialized.

Ignoring the man who had sidled up beside you, you blinked up at the sky. The city didn’t have the greatest clarity, but letting your eyes adjust for a moment revealed a splattering of the brightest stars, visible against the deep purple of the heavens. You wished you were in the countryside, where it was so pitch-dark that you could see all the constellations, and the pale, cloudy arm of the milky way as it stretched above you. Where the air was clear, and you were away from the nagging voices of your coworkers and the ambient, unsleeping, anxious hum of the city. But instead, you were stuck at a shit job you were overqualified for, with officemates you barely tolerated most days, just because you were too apathetic to try for anything better.

You slumped against the railing. You should’ve stayed home.

“Hey,” came the deep voice once more. “Ya okay over there?”

You turned to look at him, your cheek pillowed in the crook of your arm as you squinted up at him. His expression was fairly flat, but his eyes seemed honest enough, so you replied. Albeit sarcastically. “I’m doing awesome, man. I love it here.”

He snorted, lip twitching up into a small smirk. “I can see that. Yer jus’ the life of the party, huh?”

“Yup.” You turned away from him, your gaze returning to the stars.

“I woulda thought otherwise, what with how ya were staring up at the sky like ya were prayin’ for aliens ta come and abduct you.”

A sharp bark of laughter escaped you. “Where did you pull that from? Big alien believer yourself?”

“Not any more than’s logical.”

You raised an eyebrow at him, intrigued. “And how much is logical?”

He moved closer, leaning against the railing so he could more easily catch your eyes. The indigo of his irises caught the light, and, for a second, you thought he was rather pretty. “I mean, it stands ta reason, statistically, that we’re not alone out there.”

“Don’t you think we would have some evidence of alien life, if there was any?” you asked, sardonically. “Statistics aren’t always accurate, or comprehensive.”

Karasu doesn’t seem off put by your tone, smirking right back at you without a flicker of annoyance in his eyes. “Have ya ever heard of the Fermi Paradox?”

“Of course. I’m quite partial to the great filter theory, myself.”

“Do ya think the filter is behind us or ahead of us?”

You stared up at the sky with a frown on your face. “Ahead. I hope civilization hits a wall soon. I’m tired.”

He let out a laugh like a raven’s cackle. “Well aren’tcha a bright spot of sunshine? Personally, I think they’re out there, jus’ watchin’ us.”

“Why?”

“’T’s what I woulda done.”

“Ooh, alien civilization observer Karasu. You’d need a better title than that though, right now it sounds a bit voyeuristic.”

“Tabito.”

You turned back to look at him. “Huh?”

“Ya can call me Tabito.”

You studied him for a moment. The strangely gelled shape of his hair reflected the starshine like an oil slick, and the light seemed to drip down his face and settle into the amused wrinkles at the corners of his bright eyes. He was overly familiar with you, accent and tone breaking down any sort of professional distance, but you found that you, oddly enough, didn’t mind. It was refreshing to talk to someone so frank, who didn’t take your bluntness for an attack. Instead, he seemed…amused by you. (Charmed, even, if you were being wistful.)

“Sure. Tabito,” you said, before offering up your own name in return. You ignored the little flicker of something in your chest at hearing it repeated back at you in his deep voice.

“So, what was that about voyeurism?...”

You glanced away, a little flustered but unwilling to surrender. “I stand by it. Secretly observing a different intelligent species sounds weird as fuck, actually. I don’t want to think about it.”

“Aw, wouldn’t ya want ta observe me if I was ‘n intelligent species? No? ‘M hurt, truly.”

It’s on the tip of your tongue to say, ‘Maybe I would if you were an intelligent species.’ But something in you held back from using one of your typical snappish replies. Instead, you said, “Well. Perhaps I would make an exception. For you. Maybe.”

His smile was so big that it caused his eyes to form crescents. “Aw, that’s so sweet of ya, little storm cloud.”

Your nose crinkled. “Storm cloud? I thought I just gave you name privileges.”

“Ya just reminded me of one, tha’s all. Gloomy. And fluffy.”

“Fluffy?”

“On the inside.”

“Sure, Tabito.”

The two of you are silent for a moment, soaking in the relative peace of the little balcony you’ve found yourselves on. The stars continued to glitter overhead, with more and more peeking through the gloom of the night sky as time ticked past.

“Do ya need someone ta walk ya home?” he asked.

You didn’t. “Sure.”

-

Unlike his friend, Tabito was the perfect gentleman when he brought you home, leaving with nothing more than a good night and a cheeky salute. You wouldn’t have invited him in, not on a first meeting. But. You had a feeling that you might not be so unwilling after getting to know him better.

The next morning, there was a book sitting on your desk. With it, a note: “For my little storm cloud, to borrow. Tell me your opinion on it, I’m sure it’ll be interesting ;)” Hell. Maybe you didn’t want to believe the great filter was ahead; maybe life should continue on. It wasn’t all bad.

[burningcheese-merchant]

Xcuse me but I forgot very important questions about BS parenthood.

Does he teach the kids more things besides fighting? Is he a cool dad, stoic dad, protective dad or "over-the-moon" dad? Does he gives romantic advises to his son? Does he let his little beast princess play with boys her age? Does he dreads the day when she falls in love? (I have the headcannon over my own BurningCheese fankid that whatever girl/boyfriend she gets they need to AT LEAST be able to put up with him in battle)

Yay, more questions from my buddy Almellow 🗣️🔥🙌

Spice is 100% "over-the-moon dad" when they're babies. It's a pleasant surprise to many to see him so genuinely bubbly and smiley (not to Golden, though, she knows his soft side by now and is just happy to see him enjoying being a father). It's really cute. (I like the concept of hyper-masculine men being soft and loving towards their families ok)

As they grow up, he becomes a mix of all those dad modes, really. Mostly Cool Dad, because having your kids look at you like you're larger than life is just the best. (He's also not the best at disciplining them a lot of the time tbh. He wants to indulge their foolishness, it's more fun. He ends up acting like a child himself, wanting to have fun with his children. And then they all get chastised by Golden together after they break something lol)

He's less protective than you'd imagine him to be; not because he doesn't care, but because he really does have that much faith in their strength right from the get-go. It's actually Golden that's the overprotective one, at least when they're little; he had to coax her into letting them start their warrior training because she kept wanting to push it back and making excuses to do so. (She just can't bear the thought of her little ones getting hurt. She's lost so much already. If anything happened to her children, her little gems... Spice is the one to convince her to have faith in the kids and let them do things. Of course they'll get hurt, she and him get hurt all the time still and they're adults. But they'll be fine. They're tough. They have to nurture that toughness, not stifle it. They can't protect them forever... But they don't need to. The kids can stand on their own two feet. He's never doubted either of them for a second, for any reason. She shouldn't, either.) But make no mistake, Papa Bear is alive and well, just dormant. Only coming out when necessary. You want to see the old Burning Spice? You want to see the Beast of Destruction again? Hurt those kids. Harm a single hair on their heads. Make them cry, make them bleed. Knock on that devil's door enough and Burning Spice will answer it, and he will greet you with that axe of his and that fiery, seething hatred that once consumed his soul and helped burn away countless others'.

Burning Spice trying to talk to his son about love is a really amusing thought lol. I don't think he'd go out of his way to do it until he actually notices his son expressing some form of interest in someone, then it's honestly 50% Lighthearted Dad Mockery™️ and 50% Actually Trying to Teach My Son How to Be Smooth™️. Pepper Jack is having less than none of it, this is all embarrassing as hell, he doesn't want to hear a damn word from his father's mouth (he's a teenager by this point, what teen wants their dad to try to coach them on how to flirt lol). He tries to shut Spice down with sarcasm (Jack is the KING of backtalk and smartassery when he's a teenager, he's a damn menace) or just questioning his wisdom in general. He likes to bring up how annoying and gross Spice and Golden always are (unapologetic PDA constantly lol). He's already forced to witness what "love" and flirting look like, he doesn't need his father pouring salt in his wounds

(Jack once made the mistake of going "didn't you used to be weird and creepy towards Mother" once, as a sort of "gotcha". It made Spice genuinely upset and angry and he tore Jack a new one that lol. Jack felt bad (and kind of scared. Spice never really gets truly angry with the kids, but Jack has seen him get angry with others, and... Oh Lord) and apologized, promising he wouldn't say anything like that again. Things were cold and awkward between them for, like, a week. And then Spice got over it and went back to annoying his son like usual lol)

As for Matar Paneer... She's his princess. His little girl. His little flower. (He has nicknames for both of them lol. He really does love them very much.) She can play with who she wants, so long as she's happy and no harm comes to her (but again, he believes in her strength wholeheartedly and expects her to kick ass if trouble comes by). But... Oh. When she's old enough to date... Poor Spice, he's so miserable lol. He would unironically own and wear this shirt:

If Burning Spice is saying he'd gladly go back to prison for something, you best believe he's being sincere lol

It's Golden that has to step in here. Before, he was the one soothing her worries; now the roles are reversed. She needs Spice to understand that Paneer is a becoming a young woman and she has the right to pursue and be pursued if she wishes. It's ok to care and worry, but he has to let her live and grow. (She's her mother and has always been a girl's girl, she knows what's up and will always be 100% in Paneer's corner in this regard.) Spice once asked her to have more faith in them, now she's asking him to do the same. (And, of course, he can brutally murder whoever hurts Paneer, if that really does happen. But he'll have to wait his turn, because Golden already plans to do the same ☺️)

And yeah, of course Spice teaches them stuff besides fighting. He's happy to do so. He teaches them how to meditate (he gets back into that after he reforms. Jack picks it up a lot faster than Paneer does lol). He teaches them to make the traditional Wild Spice dishes he still remembers how to do himself (he lets the other spices teach them the rest). He... teaches them about history. About the Wild Spices' history, and about history in general. He sounds so... somber when he talks about things like that. It's strange to them. They're used to seeing him act lively and wear that sharp-toothed grin he's always got. But it must mean that what he's saying is really important, right? He wouldn't look and sound like that if he wasn't being serious, right?

[anonymousewrites]

A Not-So-Disastrous Romance (Book 2) Chapter Twenty

Saiki Kusuo x Reader

Chapter Twenty: Investigative Transfer

Summary: Akechi begins to investigate Saiki's "psychic-ness."

            “You’re (Y/N) (L/N), right?” said Akechi, appearing behind (Y/N) in the hall. It was between classes, and (Y/N) jumped. Akechi didn’t give (Y/N) a chance to respond and barreled right into his next question. “You’re in my class. You sat with me at lunch. I just wanted to make sure you knew who I was. I noticed you and Kusuo seemed to be close.”

            (Y/N) coughed, and they opened their mouth to speak, but Akechi continued.

            “I have a few questions about Kusuo. What is he like? Has anything strange ever happened around you while he’s there?” said Akechi.

            “Not really,” said (Y/N). They smiled. “Everything is fine with him. Sometimes we’re around weird, but fun, people, so there’s that, but Kusuo doesn’t do anything weird.”

            They don’t think of my abilities as weird. From the floor above where he was listening to the conversation, Saiki smiled slightly.

            “Anything unexplained? Sudden things appearing or disappearing? Things moving how they shouldn’t?” Akechi leaned in. “You’re obviously the closest to him. Are you just friends? Or are you dating?”

            (Y/N)’s face turned completely red. “I—”

            “Judging by your reaction, you’re either dating or at least have a crush on him,” said Akechi. “Do you have a crush on him because he’s a psychic? Is he impressive? Do you have proof of his powers?”

            (Y/N) crossed their arms. “I like Kusuo—” I love Kusuo “—because he’s a good guy. He’s nice and helpful. Anything else doesn’t matter. Who cares about stuff like psychic powers?”

            Oh, wow. I love (Y/N). Those words sent him head-over-heels for them again.

            “So you don’t see him doing anything weird?” said Akechi.

            “Nope. Everything he does is just Kusuo,” said (Y/N), smiling.

            Akechi deflated slightly. “Thank you for your time.”

            Saiki breathed a sigh of relief. He could really rely on (Y/N).

l

            “Line up!” said Matsusaki, the sun beating down on the class. They stood in gardens, reading for their jobs. “We’re digging up potatoes, today.”

            Our school does this every October, thought Saiki. Yare yare. We’re not little kids. Nobody gets excited—

            “Let’s dig up potatoes!” said Hairo.

            “Yeah!” cheered the other students.

            I’m proved wrong.

            “We’re fart after eating sweet potatoes,” laughed Nendou.

            An idiot.

            “You can’t hide from me,” declared Kaidou dramatically. “You can’t escape my Sweet Potato Radar.”

            What a useless radar.

            “A golden treasure lies in wait!” said Mera.

            She’s insatiable.

            “If I can get a few potatoes, I can make potato-based bread,” said (Y/N) thoughtfully. “That’s very good.”

            “Let’s get to work, then,” said Saiki. A good pastry from (Y/N) was all the incentive he needed. He grimaced as soon as he stepped into the fields with (Y/N). His one weakness would be present, unfortunately. “Bugs…”

            “What was that, Kusuo?” said (Y/N).

            “Nothing,” said Saiki, pulling on his gloves. At least he was working with (Y/N). I’ll just pretend to dig.

            “Hi, there, Kusuo, (L/N),” said Akechi, appearing beside them. “Can I join you? We harvested potatoes once. It was October third in second grade when I was on the bus with you and peed my pants. I caused so much trouble then.” He crouched beside (Y/N) and Saiki. “Potato harvesting is fun, isn’t it? It makes me smile.”

            “I hope it doesn’t make you pee.”

            (Y/N) nudged Saiki in the side for that comment.

            “Kusuo, watch your feet,” said Akechi. “You might step on a worm.”

            Sure enough, Saiki looked down and saw a bug. He jerked back immediately. “Crap!”

            “Are you okay?” said Akechi.

            Saiki swallowed. I held it in. That was close. He had almost exploded all the potatoes up from the ground. If I did that in front of this guy, it’s all over.

            “You don’t look well,” said Akechi.

            “Don’t worry, Kusuo,” said (Y/N). They picked up the caterpillar and set it on a bush farther away so it could eat and grow. They smiled back at Saiki. “I’ll protect you from the bugs.”

            “Are you an angel?” blurted out Saiki, and (Y/N) laughed.

            “Hey, pal, pinky, look what I harvested!” called Nendou, holding up a dozen giant potatoes.

            “Great job, Nendou,” said (Y/N).

            “Those are impressive potatoes,” said Akechi, thankfully distracted.

            “Right? His are even better, though,” said Nendou, gesturing to Kaidou. “Show them.”

            “Shut up,” huffed Kaidou. “Here.” He held up a few shriveled potatoes.

            “So tiny.”

            “Impressive, little guy!” laughed Nendou. “The skinniest potatoes!”

            “Shut up! It’s about how they taste! Not how they look,” said Kaidou defensively.

            “Those will definitely taste bad,” said Saiki.

            “Yeah,” agreed (Y/N), chuckling.

            “Did you know that the purple color of these potatoes is due to a pigment called anthocyanin?” said Akechi.

            “What’s that all about?” said Nendou.

            “My character talks a lot, so I need to talk now or you’ll forget,” said Akechi.

            “I don’t think we can forget you,” chirped (Y/N). “You leave an impression.”

            “That’s not a good thing.” I should leave while Akechi is busy. He took (Y/N)’s hand and pulled them away with him a few steps.

            They paused as they looked at Mera, who stared up at them tiredly. She had been harvesting so quickly she was already tiring. Saiki blinked. (Y/N) blinked. Mera blinked. Saiki patted her on the shoulder, and a light burst for a moment. An energized Mera jumped up and walked off for more potatoes, leaving a few for Saiki to pick up without having to face any bugs.

            “Go and prosper,” said Saiki as Mera happily went searching for more food.

            “Bye, Mera!” said (Y/N), waving.

            “Did you already finish, Kusuo? When?” said Akechi, appearing behind them.

            “When you were rambling about potato taste and color,” said Saiki.

            “But your gloves are still clean,” observed Akechi. “Did someone help you? You can’t have someone else do it.”

            “Kusuo and I were working together. He spotted the best plants, and I pulled them up,” said (Y/N), smiling and holding up their own dirty gloves.

            “The whole point of this exercise is to serve the community, so he should pull at least one for it to be fair. Come on, Kusuo, let’s do this,” said Akechi. “Help me clear away these vines.” He tossed a vine to Saiki.

            Instantly, Saiki’s eyes narrowed in on the worm about to crawl onto his hand. He sucked in a breath.

            “Look at this one, it looks like a turd!” said Nendou, showing a strange potato to Kaidou.

            Bam! It exploded.

            “It blew up!” cried Kaidou.

            “Oh, something happened,” said Akechi, looking back. He looked at Saiki with an evil look on his face. “Let’s continue.”

            He figured out I hate bugs…

            He knows Kusuo’s weakness.

            Kusuo hates bugs! though Akechi. Enough to unconsciously use his psychic powers. I’ll find some more.

            Saiki shivered and braced himself as best he could as Akechi approached. “Here, Kusuo,” said Akechi.

            “Oh, Akechi, watch out,” said (Y/N), interceding with a smile. “There are still some bugs on the vine.” They took the bugs in their gloves and deposited them back on the ground. “You don’t want to disturb them from their habitat.”

            “Oh. Right. They are good pollinators,” said Akechi, his plan interrupted once again by (Y/N).

            Saiki stared at (Y/N) like they were a real angel in the flesh. Not only had them somehow been nice to the gross bugs, but they had saved him from Akechi.

            “It’s no problem, just be careful. Leave them on the ground,” said (Y/N), smiling. “Kusuo, will you help me pull on these?”

            Saiki nodded and knelt to help them. He knew no bugs were around if (Y/N) was asking him. So, he pulled out a potato, and (Y/N) grinned.

            “There, Akechi. Now Kusuo has helped on both sides of our team-up,” said (Y/N). They gestured to their basket. “We have to head out, now. Bye.”

            Akechi watched them go. They are definitely dating. But are they covering for Kusuo because of that or do they truly not know about his powers?

            You will never find out, thought Saiki. It was bad enough that Akechi was figuring out they were dating and could blab to everyone, but he did not intend for Akechi to learn that his abilities were real.

l

            “Thank you for dealing with the bugs.” Saiki shivered as he remembered them.

            “It’s no problem,” said (Y/N), smiling and putting down a freshly baked loaf of potato bread. It had taken until the weekend to finish it up, but they had the loaf now. “Everyone has their fears.”

            “You don’t,” remarked Saiki. They faced everything easily.

            “I get scared of haunted houses and ghosts,” said (Y/N).

            “That’s only because Toritsuka is a creep and makes everything creepier,” said Saiki.

            (Y/N) laughed. “Fair enough. But I am scared of things.”

            “I don’t believe that.” (Y/N) was one of the strongest and bravest people he knew—maybe the strongest and bravest.

            “I’m scared of losing you,” teased (Y/N).

            The sudden flirting made Saiki’s cheeks warm, and (Y/N) laughed. “I bring a lot of trouble. Your life would be calmer without me.”

            “My life would be boring without you,” corrected (Y/N). “And I like my life with you in it.”

            “Even when you have to deal with people like Akechi or Teruhashi or Kusuke?” said Saiki incredulously.

            “Yeah,” said (Y/N), shrugging as if it was obvious. “Kokomi is my friend, and she is growing, maturing. She is so used to her identity being her looks that she’s still figuring out who she is beyond that. I think she’s going to find who she is and be happier for it. So she’s no bother.

            “Kusuke is…eccentric, but I know you and I can handle his ridiculous games.” They laughed.

            “And as for Akechi…I think he’s just looking for answers. Whatever happened between you two, he’s clearly been left with questions, and I can’t blame him for wanting to understand,” said (Y/N). “If you had just teleported away when I found you teleporting the hotel, I would be confused and try to get answers.” They shrugged. “So I don’t care about all that. I like having you in my life, Kusuo. You’re my boyfriend now, and you were my friend before. Nothing changes that I care about you.”

            “You’re too nice.”

            “And you’re too pessimistic, so we balance each other out,” laughed (Y/N).

            “…Should I tell Akechi?” said Saiki. “Would that get him to leave us alone?”

            (Y/N) looked at him. “Do you want my honest answer?” Saiki nodded. “Probably not. I think he wants to be your friend like you were in elementary school. And he seems like the type that becomes part of our friend group.” They laughed.

            “I don’t know if he wants to be my friend about elementary school,” said Saiki.

            (Y/N) paused. “Do you want to talk about it?”

            “I…did something I shouldn’t have,” said Saiki.

            (Y/N) sat down across from Saiki and held out their hand. Saiki took their offer and held their hand. “You can tell me if you want.”

            “I healed him after he was bullied. He was nice to me, and I wanted to help. I thought he was unconscious, but he had seen everything. He started calling me a psychic, a healer, the next few days, and the bullies started demanding I prove it.” Saiki paused. “I didn’t. I acted clueless. I thought that would stop everything, but—”

            (Y/N) squeezed his hand encouragingly, gazing at him.

            “I found Akechi beaten up again. I saw them standing over him, and I just snapped.” Saiki swallowed. “I destroyed the entire classroom and barely managed to wipe the memories of the bullies of what I’d done. But Akechi saw. And I had to leave schools. All because I lost control and hurt people.” He looked at (Y/N). “That’s why Akechi can’t find out it was real. Because I was a danger. He’ll tell everyone that I’m a danger. And I didn’t mean to—”

            “Of course you didn’t,” said (Y/N), squeezing his hand. “You were six years old, Kusuo. What six-year-old can control their emotions, let alone psychic powers? It was an accident, and it happened because you wanted to protect your friend. No one can fault you for that.” They smiled. “And you don’t know that Akechi thinks you’re a danger. Maybe he just wants to know if you really did help him. You two were friends. Maybe that’s what he wants back. His friend.”

            “Maybe. I don’t know.”

            “But you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do,” said (Y/N). “But if you decide to do anything or just want to talk, I’m here, alright? I’m always here.”

            “Even knowing I’m capable of harm?” said Saiki quickly.

            “Everyone is capable of harm. Everyone is capable of good,” said (Y/N). “What’s important is that you choose to do good.” They smiled, lifted his hand, and kissed the back. “That’s why I like you so much.”

            Saiki smiled slightly. “You always know what to say.”

            “I just say what I think,” said (Y/N).

            “I know.” And it meant the world to Saiki.

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[complementaryhalves]

here, have about 1k of unedited random paulos stuff. might continue it, might not

set on media day in Austin, warning for implied future cheating/debatably open relationships (i haven't decided)

Over nearly ten years spent in Formula One, Carlos has learned that most paddock VIP guests fall into one of two categories: either they’re people he’s never heard of and cares very little about, or they’re celebrities he knows and admires. In the first case, he usually has to rely on the info given by his media officer to hold a few minutes of awkward small talk, take a few photographs for social media, and then forget their names as soon as they're gone. In the second case,  he’s normally more excited and happier to engage. He often asks questions about their field of work, and gladly answers any they might have about his. A few times, like with Will Smith in Baku, he got properly starstruck, leading his teammate to make fun of him for being too flustered.

The experience of meeting Paul Mescal falls somewhere in between those two extremes.

He knows who the guy is—caught a few moments of a show he’s in that Rebecca occasionally rewatches, just enough to see that he was handsome and quite talented, at least in Carlos’ uneducated opinion. When he saw that he would star in the new Gladiator, he wasn’t all that against it. Sure, he was no Russel Crowe, but he had the look, and surely he could be convincing.  

When Ferrari told them they would do a collaboration with the film, Carlos was elated. He may not care about fashion as much as Charles, but he did enjoy working with Rocco on their outfits for the London premiere, and the thought of walking the red carpet among movie stars was exciting, in its own strange way. He even had Rebecca give him some posing lessons, mostly for fun. He was sure that once there he would forget all of her advice, but it would be fine—or so Silvia swore.

She was the one who told them Paul would join them for media day in Austin to be photographed with them and film some content, and Carlos was happy enough. He would have preferred to meet Pedro Pascal, but he could settle for the less famous guy. It would be easier, he thought. When he told Rebecca, he joked that he was glad she couldn’t be there to meet him, feigning a jealousy he didn’t feel, and she laughed and informed him that he’s got a girlfriend anyway.

It was only when they actually met, Thursday morning in Austin, that he realised there was little to joke about.

Paul Mescal, Carlos discovers on that warm Texan morning, is an extremely pleasant person to be around. More handsome in person than he is on-screen, at least from what Carlos remembers of that show he did. Casual in a way that looks intentional, handsomely scruffy, with a hint of edginess in the simple silver earring that keeps catching the sunlight as they talk outside the garage. He’s also funny, well-spoken, polite, easy-going. Eager to know more about what it is to be an F1 driver, happy to answer all of Carlos’ questions about what it is to star in a production like the Gladiator, excited to take part in the silly games the media team has devised for them.

Another characteristic Carlos notices about Paul quite early on is that he’s quite the flirt. Carlos knows the type—he’s had that kind of banter with Daniel or Nico before, and he knows how to take it in stride without thinking much of it and to give back the same energy just for the fun of it, with no real intentions behind it.

When Paul asks him if he’d give him a hot lap in a Ferrari, Carlos shrugs a light-hearted “sure”, dares him to name a model he’d like to try, and laughs when Paul grins and says, “I don’t care as long as it’s red and it’s got you at the wheel.”

A bit later, after Carlos has asked his many questions about making films, Paul asks him whether he’s considering a career change. When Carlos snorts his dissent, saying he definitely doesn’t have that talent, Paul gives him a once-over and tells him he’s surely got the look, to which Carlos laughs an unserious thanks.

And then again, when they somehow end up talking about Gaelic football, Paul laughs at Carlos’ obvious confusion about the rules, and proposes instead he should just take him to see a game back in Ireland. Genuinely interested in the proposal, Carlos enthusiastically says he’d gladly accept the invitation, before adding that his girlfriend would surely also enjoy a trip to Ireland. If the conversation becomes a bit stilted after that, he thinks nothing of it, and shortly after the three of them are ushered inside so they can get ready to film the challenge.

Charles stops him by the door while Paul is taken away by his media rep for a last minute briefing and make up check, and after putting a hand on his shoulder, he gives him an amused look and says, “You really broke his heart right then.”

When Carlos gives him an inquisitive look, silently asking him to elaborate, Charles widens his eyes and laughs at him, openly mocking.

“Mate, you really didn’t notice? He’s been flirting with you since he got here.”

“No, he hasn’t,” Carlos responds, making a face. Charles always thinks people they meet are after them in that sense; Carlos never agrees. “He’s just friendly.”

Predictably, Charles rolls his eyes. “He wasn’t that friendly to me.”

Grinning, Carlos wiggles an eyebrow at him. “Maybe he doesn’t like you.”

“Fuck off,” Charles scoffs, pushing his shoulder. “Everyone likes me,” he says, and while Carlos makes a sarcastic ‘yeah, sure’ face, he adds, “He was just nicer to you so he can get in your pants.”

“Don’t be crass, Charles. It doesn’t suit you,” Carlos responds with a disgusted grimace before shrugging his hand away.

Charles raises his hands, signalling that he’s giving up on that conversation, and thankfully, Carlos can’t think too hard about what he said. Ollie just entered the room, and Silvia is coming over to explain to them what games they planned for the video.

[carlos-in-glasses]

How are you dealing with Tarlos being over? I’m seriously not good. It helps that Ronen said they are best friends off screen but knowing that we will never see them together again is really making me sad.

Hello! Thank you for this question. Firstly, a huge internet hug for you because I really feel your pain 💔❤️❤️❤️❤️ and this is a topic we're all grappling with I'm sure. In terms of Tarlos as characters, I'm trying not to look at it as them being totally 'over' because they and the other characters can live on through art and fanfic, just like they did during the hiatuses between seasons. We didn't need 'new' canon content to keep creating. We just...kept creating. Although this was perhaps fuelled by looking forward to the show’s return, I don't see why that has to be all that different now. There are fandoms that revolve around single books, single movies, and thrive on a lot less content than we have to work with. 

However, I appreciate that you might not be a reader of fic, and indeed even if you are…..The show itself and the physical portrayal of these characters is certainly ending far too soon, and honestly I fucking hate that. I feel sad in my body. I'd go as far to say I'm actually bitter about it, and bitterness is a horrible, horrible feeling! I keep thinking – if we hadn't had a season 3, we'd have missed out on so many amazing moments on screen, culminating in the proposal. If we hadn't had a season 4, we'd have missed out on the soulmates scene and the wedding! No season 5, no seeing TK being flung onto a dresser, no dancing at the party, none of the Enzo/Jonah/Carlos' investigation stuff that I'm LOVING. Which leaves me with this strong ache as I wonder what we are missing out on with no season 6, 7, 8... 

So, the silver lining is that the fandom will make the best out of a shit situation creatively, but it is a shit situation in reality. I think it's absolutely fine for us to mourn this loss and be there for each other, because those of us who profoundly love this show and Tarlos are all in it together and understand the magnitude. I am certainly in a weird state of grief not related to death but related to this different kind of loss, and there will always be part of me hurting over this thing I love so much. I only found the show after season 3 and it just doesn't feel like I've had enough time with it. I haven’t had enough fun!

I hope we do get to see Ronen and Rafa reunite again from time to time. They’ll be at the Paris convention in December, and maybe others along the way if their schedules allow. I was lucky enough to go to the one in June last year and Ronen, Rafa, Natacha and Sierra certainly did appear to be very close irl, so definitely do take heart in that – it’s a reason to believe we’ll get at least glimpses of them together going forward.

So yeah. I’m finding good things where I can in all this, but the headline is that I really am sad and struggling too, and I’m so sorry you are and I hope you’re able to fill your day with things that help you to feel a bit better. I hope everyone who reads this is able to do the same.

[whenalltheeyesopen]

At this point @jellyskink has shown Ford losing no fewer than three separate pet shows, so I made a followup to the fic where Irene drives him home while he's having an abandonment-related mental breakdown.

Enjoy!

Irene paced three steps along the hall runner. She tapped the little ivy leaf that marked the midpoint, turned, walked back.

"This is the stupidest thing I've ever done," she said out loud to the empty hallway.

Then she picked up her phone and made a call.

---

Dr. Ibis almost didn't answer. Dr. Irene Oleander was a nice enough woman, but a call from her so soon before one of his regular appointments with that patient was a guaranteed migraine. It was fine when she was just requesting his most recent x-rays, but sometimes she called to tell him that she had found flesh-eating worms in the man's gums and to please be careful in case Bill Cipher had been denying his favorite pet medicine access.

Whatever this was, it would be just as unpleasant tomorrow. It was probably important, possibly time sensitive. Sometimes, the migraine needs must be endured.

"Hello, Irene," he said.

"Yusuf. How are you doing?"

"Fairly well." He gave the file on his computer screen a quick once-over. "Busy with work. I assume you're calling for business?"

There was nothing but the white noise of a poor connection.

"...Hello?"

"I'm here," Oleander confirmed. She sounded uncomfortable. "This is going to sound extremely strange, but I wanted to ask you a favor."

Ibis raised an eyebrow, even though she couldn't see. He tried to make sure the humor was obvious in his inflection: "I hope we aren't on such bad terms that a favor is outlandish to ask."

"No, no, it's just- it's an outlandish favor."

Ibis hummed. "Irene," he said, "does it by any chance have anything to do with a certain mutual patient?"

To his chagrine, she did not respond immediately.

He sighed loudly. "Just tell me what it is."

"Is there a custom trophy shop near you?"

"A what?"

"A trophy shop, or a place that does etchings or something."

"Uh-" he had never had cause to investigate, but he was pretty sure the print shop did tchotchkes. "I think so?"

"Right. Um." Oleander made a strange noise. "Um, so, after your last appointment, you asked me to try and get Dr. Pines to start flossing regularly since he hadn't been listening to you. And I did talk to him, and last I saw him he said he had been."

"Well that's peachy," Ibis said drily. "He eats nothing but organ meat and candy with as far as I can tell a side helping of stainless steel deadbolts. But at least he's flossing."

"Believe me, I'm fighting that same battle," Oleander said. There was real anger in her voice. She was much more invested than Ibis in the lost cause that was patient health.

Static again.

"Alright," she said. "Can you, um. This is going to sound stupid. Can you make him a trophy for it."

Ibis almost couldn't believe his ears. "For flossing?"

"I know it's ridiculous."

"Ridiculous doesn't begin to cover it."

"I'll pay you back for the cost, and - I don't know, I'll buy you dinner or something. Or owe you a favor."

Ibis glanced over at his computer again. He did some mental timesheet math.

"Yusuf?"

"I'm thinking."

"Please. I know it's dumb, but he's had a really bad... Uh, series of encounters."

"Yes, I saw them on TV."

Oleander's voice went quiet while she swore away from the receiver. "You were watching."

"I thought it might be fun to see how Calimari did."

"That's... Very sweet of you."

"I found Cipher's entries infinitely more entertaining."

"You-" Oleander cut her own furious response off, apparently remembering that she wanted Ibis to owe her a favor. "Will you help me cheer him up or not?"

"Well," Ibis said, "you do have a way with insurance companies."

"You want me to do your insurance coding for you???"

About eight hours of it, in fact. "If you want me to cheer up your sad little man."

"Yusuf, I swear-"

"Deal or no deal?"

She went silent again. She was definitely fuming at him.

"...Deal."

"Fantastic."

"Thank you."

"I hope you have a marvelous day, Irene."

"You too."

"I'll send you the relevant documents."

"Lovely."

He logged out if his computer. He stretched his shoulders, stiff from too much desk jockying, and headed out the door.

Maybe flossing trophies would enter his normal hygiene support system after this.

[castingspellsanddaisies]

How's sexy time with...Jobe Bellingham? + his general personality + how's he emotionally? + how's he as a partner? | Tarot Reading

DISCLAIMER: Take everything with a grain of salt and have fun!

WOW... The brothers really look alike, huh?

This post has 18+ content, so if you don't want to read it, beat it.

How's sexy time with him?

9 of swords + 9 of cups + queen of cups + king of swords + king of wands reversed + 8 of wands reversed + 4 of swords + judgement + the star

Ladies and gentlemen, this man right here... Knows what he's doing.

What's the word? Munch? Yes, that's it. Jobe loooves to go down on his partner like there's no tomorrow. And he likes to make them scream! The wetter, the loudest the better for him.

He's loud too. I feel like he talks a lot during it and he's very vocal. Hot. He likes to call the shots, so very demanding (''now open your legs for me'', ''louder I wanna hear you'' ''who told you to stop, baby?'' these phrases came into my mind, so... Similar to this).

BUT he may have problems climaxing and making his partner c*m with only penetra*on. Oh, I see... That's why he prefers oral s*x. He liked to finish with his partner suc*ing him off most of times. And vice versa.

He's just... Really good with his mouth. Squ*rting too. And he goes round after round after round...

What's his general personality?

mountain + ship + lily + star | back of the deck: bouquet

the wheel of fortune + page of wands reversed + 3 of swords reversed + 10 of pentacles reversed | back of the deck: 2 of pentacles

Jobe's very hard on himself to always be better than he was yesterday. But he feels like his life's not moving as he would like.

He struggles a lot to have confidence in himself and in his goals, what he does. But here's the thing: Jobe is good at hiding his insecurities from everybody. He's very good at pretending everything is fine. He adapts easy to any situation. He acts like the people around him act.

I see that he has some insecurties concerning ''making his family proud''. Do I have to say it out loud? It's about him having big shoes (Jude's) to fill.

How's he emotionally?

king of wands + the moon reversed + king of pentacles + justice reversed | back of the deck: 5 of cups

Jobe's kind of pessimistic.

he likes to go to the core of every trouble he faces. He's not afraid to dig in and find ugly things about himself and other people. He prefers to know the ugly truth than live with pretty lies.

He's very critical with himself. He must be careful to not be unkind and unfair sometimes to people.

How's he as a partner in romantic relationships?

garden + cross + letter + crossroads | back of the deck: lily

10 of cups reversed + the star reversed + 4 of cups + 8 of pentacles | back of the deck: 5 of swords

He's the thing: Jobe's very reticent about dating, and that's because he feels like there's no one good enough for him. But calm down! What I mean is that Jobe can see how the ''dating scenario'' is nowadays and he doesn't like what he sees (people cheat all the time, they lack commitment, lack of accountability, lack of maturity...).

He's easy to disatisfy when he tries a relationship with someone. And he lacks mtivation to try something serious. It's like he lost faith in good relationships happening for him. And he's very direct about it with people. He doesn't shy away from saying how relationships are not for him - at least not right now. He loses interest quickly.

That's it, folks. I hope you enjoyed the reading! Take care <3

[criscura]

I want to get to the good part of this blastvoid thing I'm writing but i do NOT want to write the part before it and I'm procrastinating so fucking hard

Like i know what i want and it'll be satisfying but it's like the reverse of eating beef jerky, where this is the tough gross part you just need to swallow before getting to the fucking SPPIUCCE

[bizarrelittlemew]

✨ reaction gifs ✨

this isn't something i usually do, but i'm dumping a bunch of my gifs here that you are free to use and repost for your social media reaction gif needs (this is special permission for the gifs below – otherwise, remember to always credit gifmakers!!)

if you save and use these gifs, please give this post a like/reblog!

also i'm @bizarrelilmew over on twitter/X where i'm more active currently so feel free to follow me there 🤸

[buttercupshands]

just some LoV sitting in the long lost bar in Ultra Impact in clothes that they didn't wear yet

[cerealmonster15]

the block button isnt enough i need to set things on FIRE

[readingwriter92]

Anxiety is cancelled from now on. I’ve had too much of it today

[running-in-the-dark]

kinda disappointed with how this weekend went. I mean, it wasn't bad! but it was our first weekend in the new apartment, and I/we wanted to get a lot done. I already did a lot during the week (a lot for me, not a lot for most people I guess), but there's lots of things that I can't do/can't do on my own, either because I'm too short or not strong enough or I need someone else to hold something or whatever. which realistically just won't get done during the week because my husband works full time, so. it sort of sucks that only one very small, unimportant thing got done. 😔

[triglycercule]

who made the mtt. and no i dont mean like who made the CONCEPT of the murder time trio (because i know who that is. touken kamui i thank you for the fangame every day :3) but like,,,, who decided to just randomly pair these 3 together?? like whaaaat.......

part of me wants to believe it was rahafwabas with the whole bad sanses group thingy being made with those 3 in there and then like. the fangame just gave them specifically a seperate group name. but STILL,,,,, where did this trio come from

[messybouquetoflilies]

im so delusional what is wrong with meeeee

[zemnarihah]

ive obtained a guitar