#or 21 in my case because it got renewed a while ago

[ghoul--doodle]

I justsst wanted to buy a pack of disposable razors please JGDJFJ

[garc-i-a]

Why JATP Is Taking a While to Get Officially Renewed

Thought I would put my thoughts into words on the renewal situation. We know that the show was released on Netflix on September 10, 2020. As of today, it has been 242 days (10 May 2021). Julie and the Phantoms was released under Netflix Family, marking it as a children’s show on the streaming service. It was released in the middle of the second wave of the coronavirus (in the US) that has swept the world over. The show was created by Kenny Ortega, legendary choreographer and director.

To start off, we have to acknowledge that we ARE in a pandemic. Due to that, things have been touch and go in so many industries. That includes the TV/Film industry as well. The US and Canada, the two countries involved in making the show, have to follow the rules and laws related to COVID regardless of what people in the industry want. With that, we have to pay attention to what is going on with the pandemic to know how to go about filming. 

As of right now, Canada still has closed borders from the US to nonessential travel. To get into Canada as a foreigner you have to be going for a specific reason and follow all the Covid related travel rules. To read more about this, you can go to canada.ca and type in for traveling during the pandemic. Not to mention that for a lot of areas in Canada, they are still essentially in lockdown because of the now rising numbers in the country. Charlie’s home province of New Brunswick is still pretty restricted. 

Regarding vaccinations, although the United States has been slowly getting people vaccinated, Canada has had issues with getting vaccinations and don’t nearly have as many vaccinated. It is only just a few days ago that New Brunswick started administering vaccinations in the last few days. The vaccinations are only for people who are 50+ who fall into specific medical condition guidelines. For British Columbia, where the show is filmed, vaccines started getting administered the third week of April. It is believed there is a chance of getting all* adults vaccinated by mid June. My source for this information is from a native New Brunswicker and a CTV News article.

For the cast, getting vaccinated is paramount. Owen is already vaccinated. Madison’s dad is also vaccinated so it is likely she is as well or part way there. Now for people who are NOT vaccinated yet, most vaccines are administered in two doses. The doses are done about three weeks apart (I am partially vaccinated and my first dose was already done and second is next week). This knowledge is important as people need to be aware of the timing of these things. The amount of time between vaccines and for everyone in the cast and crew is essential for everything to go smoothly with filming.

One of the big things that I have seen a lot is the outrage at other shows on Netflix being renewed before Julie and the Phantoms. There is a two fold answer to this. To start off, we have to remember that because of this pandemic, things take longer to process to be extra diligent and that more money is be used to cover for reconstructions and accommodations due to Covid. Knowing these two things, let’s delve into the renewals of other shows.

Some of the other shows that have been renewed are Fate: The Winx Saga, Bridgerton, Ginny and Georgia, and Emily in Paris. The big difference between these shows and Julie and the Phantoms is the fact they are not in the Netflix Family category. They are considered content for adults or young adults. Netflix has different rules on their shows that are put out on the regular platform versus the family section. Netflix Family rarely posts when a show is renewed so far from its premiere date for the next season. So in that respect, Julie and the Phantoms wouldn’t be given a huge announcement for the next season’s renewal if it follows the pattern of Netflix Family’s marketing.

Tying into this the matter of where the rest of the shows are filmed and the backing behind them in regards to production. The Winx show and Bridgerton are filmed in the UK, Ginny and Georgia is filmed in Toronto, Ontario, Canada, and Emily in Paris is filmed on location in France. The reason that this matters is because these places have different rules for working during this pandemic, the vaccinations levels, and the threat of getting sick from Covid. These shows are also connected to larger properties or influential individuals*. Vancouver is a popular city to film in, of course, but it has been dealing with an uptick in cases as well as in a different province than Ginny and Georgia, and as such has their own rules. We cannot take into the likes of Riverdale or other shows that are filming right now in Vancouver. Lots of these shows were renewed and set to film already when the pandemic hit. They do not factor into things.

The last part of this is the production costs for making the show. As mentioned before, Vancouver is a popular city to film in. Due to the pandemic, it costs more to film because the need to have extra precautions, regular Covid testing, and etc. We know that there were shows that were initially renewed by Netflix but then canceled after the fact. The reason for this is that Netflix likely realized the cost to produce the shows would be too much and not in the best interest of the cast, crew, and any companies involved in the middle of such a huge reaching pandemic.

Compared to other shows in the Netflix Family section, Julie and the Phantoms has a high production level. I did some research on the Netflix originals in the section and the shows on there are either very low budget or have a backing from a franchise/company (ex. Baby Boss, Fast and Furious, Jurassic Park). Julie and the Phantoms does not have that. It is not connected to an established franchise or a large company. It is simply made by the likes of Kenny Ortega who does not skimp on anything in his productions. Kenny has stated that he is not willing to let the grandness of the show suffer because of the pandemic. The show has many crowd scenes and dancing sequences that require a lot of people. The show won’t be what it is without this. Based on this, we know that Netflix wants to be absolutely sure they can go forth with filming before announcing a renewal.

And there you guys go. All the information that I looked into and checked for this piece. I hope this helps many people understand what is going on why it is taking longer for the show to get renewed. It is not that Netflix doesn’t want to renew it. It is a matter of HOW and WHEN. If that makes sense. If you have any questions about what I wrote, you can leave a comment or DM me.

all*- Some individuals may not wish to be vaccinated

influential individuals*- There are people connected to some of the shows that have a standing within the media and the finances or awards to warrant being a part of the show or it being made at all.

Amendment

I was informed by my source in New Brunswick that vaccines have been administered since January but the qualification for who is eligible for the vaccines can change from week to week.

Amendment 2

Reuters has reported that children aged 12-15 are able to start getting the vaccine today (13 May 2021). So that means that Jadah and Sonny (15 and 13, respectively) will be fully vaccinated by the middle of June.

Amendment 3

A few days ago a local upstate New York newspaper wrote about Canada starting the process of opening up borders again. The process is in the beginning stages so there is no announced date(s) on the border reopening but it is in the works.

Amendment 4

A show called Firefly Lane has been renewed for a season 2. This is important because Firefly Lane is filmed in the same area of British Columbia as Julie and the Phantoms. British Columbia is getting better in regards to vaccinations and so this proves good news of a season 2 announcement for Julie and the Phantoms.

Amendment 5

It was reported on 21 or 22 June 2021 that Canada will relax quarantine rules for vaccinated Canadian citizens, permanent residents, and foreign nationals for essential work. This new system will go into effect 5 June 2021. If you are fully vaccinated and pass rules set by the government, you will NOT have to abide by the hotel quarantine steps when entering the country. That means that the JATP cast and crew can get to filming right away instead of quarantining beforehand. To read more about this: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.lonelyplanet.com/amp/articles/canada-border-reopening

Amendment 6

On Charlie’s live yesterday (28 June 2021), Madison said that she got the second dose of the vaccine earlier in the day. In 14 days, she will be good to go on going out and such. Hopefully Jadah and Sonny have gotten at least their first dose. Gets us closer to being able to have the cast and crew together for the show.

Amendment 7

The National Law Review published an article on 2 July 2021 saying that fully vaccinated individuals will be able to travel between Canada and the US on 21 July or possibly sooner. Prime Minister Justin Trudeau says he wants 75% of Canadians to be fully vaccinated before allowing the border to be opened. With current numbers, it is believed this will be achieved in a few weeks time.

Amendment 8

The New York Times just reported that fully vaccinated Americans could be allowed into Canada by mid August and that people from other countries could be allowed to enter by September.

Amendment 9

It was just reported about two hours ago that Canada will allow vaccinated Americans in on 9 August. That is exactly 3 weeks from now on a Monday. Now all we have to focus on is protocols for safety while in Vancouver while filming.

[fckingflaminghomosexual]

Why that Decider article means we’re getting a season 2: an extensive explanation

okay so before i get started, let me explain why what i’m saying is credible lol

i’ve been a fan of one direction for going on 10 years now, so i have some low-level FBI skills, and i have a (little more than) basic understanding of how the entertainment industry works

i know me saying that i’m a 1d fan probably makes everyone roll their eyes at me, but trust me, i know what i’m talking about

also i’m tagging my bestie @yellow-roseman because he told me about the articles, and i did a deep-dive into them, and now here we are lol

now onto the explanation

PART 1: The Articles

a website called Decider released an article two days ago about the pending confirmation or cancellation of a Julie and the Phantoms renewal. it answered the question of: “Will there be a Season 2?” with a “Maybe”

yesterday, 1/15/21, Decider released another article titled “7 Shows Like ‘Julie and the Phantoms’ to Watch While You Wait for Season 2″ that was suspiciously confident in the renewal of the show

the article claims that Julie and the Phantoms was officially renewed and links another article to tell you when that happened, though we haven’t heard any news about it

if you click on the link to this other article, it brings you to the one i mentioned previously: “When Is ‘Julie and the Phantoms’ Season 2 Coming to Netflix?”

in this article, as i said, there is no confirmation of a season 2

in fact, the article specifically states “Decider will update this piece when Netflix makes a decision about Julie and the Phantoms Season 2.”

PART 2: Here’s what’s going on

I have seen many articles get released before they should have been, and i will explain that in more detail later, but that is clearly what happened here

the article that confirms a season 2 appears to have been released a little early because they linked a previous article that hadn’t been updated yet, and a lot of these types of pieces get written long before they are actually published, so it’s possible the announcement has been being planned and news sites were informed to publish an article as soon as the announcement was out

here’s why i think it came out yesterday:

it’s likely that the publisher was given the wrong date to publish the article, or they accidentally got the dates mixed up, but it’s very likely that we are getting the official announcement within the next week or so

now here’s an example of this type of situation happening somewhere else in the entertainment industry, in case you don’t believe me yet

PART 3: The Shawmila Fiasco

yes, i know, i’ve just struck fear in the hearts of many by acknowledging the most obvious PR stunt in history, but trust me, it’s necessary

in August 2019, Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello were set to perform their crappy hit collaboration song at the VMAs, and of course some people were excited about that (read: not me)

one whole day before the award show, Entertainment Weekly posted an article about their “spicy VMAs performance” THAT HADN’T HAPPENED YET

of course, the article has been deleted now, but nothing on the internet ever goes away, so we have these screenshots

not only is the article’s title preceded by a “PREP”, showing that it wasn’t supposed to be released yet, a redditor pointed out that the bold portion (TK TK TK) is common in articles like this and here’s an explanation for it:

THE FINAL PART: Why this is relevant

so, obviously, it’s quite common for news sites to write these articles before anything has actually happened (that we’ve seen), and it is safe to assume that the early release of the Decider article means we’ll be getting confirmation on season 2 of JATP any day now

[alwaysonthemend]

Destiel Fic Recs (An extensive rec list of almost every single Destiel fic I‘ve ever read.)

NOTE

- This is a masterlist of all of my fic recs. They include AUs, SPN universe, codas, ficlets, schoolfics, and more!

- Works marked with (*) denote my absolute favorites.  

-This rec list is all Destiel (I'm a clown 🤡, sue me.) If you don’t like it, don’t read it. 

-Yes, many of these works are NSFW, but usually said scenes can be skipped without losing important plot info.

-This list will be updated whenever I find a good fic, though probably not regularly if I'm honest. (Life happens...)

-I DO NOT own any of the work found on this list, nor do I claim it to be my own; I am simply making this so that others can enjoy these fics as well.

-Please do not hate on anyone or anything. If you don't like Destiel, then don't read the fics. If you hate the author, don't tell me because I don't care about that drama. (Walk AwaaAYyaYAaa)

1. Twist and Shout****** by @gabriel and @standbyme Archive Of Our Own.

Thoughts- I'm sure that there is nothing I can say that you haven't already heard. Just read it. Suffer along with the rest of us. There's fluff, smut, angst (the holy trinity.) This is truly the best fan fic ever written. Period. 20/10.

2. 300 Things by @cautionzombies. (I can't find the original source so you'll have to try and find it on your own...)  

Thoughts- What's a Supernatural rec list without 300 Things? This really is an amazing fic and it is written so well!  

3. How A Righteous Man Raises A Rose by @swordofmymouth- Live Journal.  

Thoughts- This fic really took me by surprise. It's tagged as an AU, but I think you'll find that it's not at all what you think. The author effortlessly sets a mood of loss and regret, yet still gives the light a chance to shine through. I went into this fic thinking it to be an AU, and it was at first. But I soon realized that there was much more to this fic than what at first meets the eye. I shed a few tears over this one.

4. Cleanse the Mirror* by @takadainmate -Live Journal.  

Thoughts- Man, this one hurts, but in the best way. I read this fic a long time ago but lost it and couldn't find it for a long time. I am so glad that I found it and was able to re read. Just as enjoyable (if not more so) the second time. Dean gets a better understanding of what it's like being an angel. (And Cas is written so well in this fic! He's just like he is in the show. It's incredible!)  

5. A Hole in the World by @bauble - Live Journal.

Thoughts- This one just hurts and hurts and hurts. This is one that you'll just have to read and see for yourself. No happy ending. (You've been warned.)  

6. In the Shadow of Your Wings by @EnochianThings - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is a really well written fic. There were several times that I almost forgot that I was reading a fan fic because the characters and story are just so well though out. It's a bit of a long one and is set in a (sort of) canon!verse.

7. My Throat is An Open Grave* by @inkandpaperqwerty - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This was one of the first fan fics that I ever read for Supernatural. This one is just so heartwarming, but not before plenty of angst and hurt/comfort. The author seamlessly puts Sam and Dean into a heartbreaking AU and it's all about the love that Sam and Dean have for each other. (NOT Wincest.)  

8. Thursday's Child* by @strangeandcharm - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- All I can say is... Ow. Slow burn to end all slow burns, but so worth it in the end. This one is set in the End!verse (which I'm a total sucker for.) Dean and Cas are just so sad and I just want to hug them and make it all better. Imagine, Future!Dean's plan to kill Lucifer!Sam works and now he has to live with the fact that he killed his own brother, devil or not. And Cas has to come to terms with the fact that he survived the epic showdown, despite his belief that he wouldn't, and now has an addiction that he has to get under control. I love this fic and it really is a painfully slow read, but more than worth it in the end.  

9. Après by @imogenbynight - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Dean and Cas go to Paris... Need I say more? I love this fic because it addresses the crappy way that Dean always has Cas coming to him and how Dean needs to step up and realize the sacrifices Cas has made for him (shameless bias opinion... Sorry) All us Cas stans will really appreciate this one. Written well, characterization flawless... What else can you ask for?

10. Dean's Days Off* by @MittenWraith - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is just the sweetest, fluffiest fic you could ever ask for. Reading it made me want to fall in love so badly it hurt. Cas and Dean just get some well deserved rest and quiet. I am absolutely in love with this fic and I'll read it over and over again. (Especially if I've had a bad day and need some happiness)

11. Unlit, Unmarked, and Forgotten by @awed_frog -

Archive Of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is a beautiful coda for 11x17. There's some Destiel if you squint. It's very sad but somehow manages a happy ending that renews your hope and brings a soft smile to your face.

12. Down Like Water by @museaway - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- I really like this fic a lot. It is very sad with a lot of Hurt!Castiel but it does actually have a happy ending. Just grit your teeth and bare through the angst and sadness to make it to the beautifully sappy ending.

13. Till Kingdom Come* by @freckles_n_feathers - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - This is a season 11 AU that was written before season 11 aired (the author actually somehow predicted things that were going to happen before they aired!!) This fic gave me really high hopes for season 11 that weren't quite fulfilled. I loved season 11, don't get me wrong (it's actually one of my favorite seasons) this fic was just so perfect and I wanted it to be canon so badly. (I re wrote this review like four times because I kept saying "actually" lol)  

14. 12x19 Destiel Ficlet by @Samanstiel - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - This was written before 12x19 aired, and if you were upset with how things went down then this is the fic for you. The characters are written so well and it really feels like an actual episode.

15. Contrapasso*** by @takadainmate - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This might be the best fic ever (trumped only by Twist and Shout...) Inspired by Dantes Inferno and so beautifully written! I just... There aren't words. It's very dark, and the ending was not at all what I wanted (but after much thought, I realized that there couldn't have been a better ending.) I really got lost in this fic. I could see exactly what the author described, I could feel what the characters felt. This is true art... This is the fic we've all been looking for.

16. Put Up Your Dukes by @takadainmate - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This fic is by one of my favorite authors (who has featured on this rec list before...) Hilariously dirty. Dean and Cas are bone heads who can't make up there minds. Human!Cas is also a little sh*t and I'm living for it. There's some smutty times in this one... (which can easily be skipped if you're not comfortable without losing any important points of the story. {at least I didn't feel like I missed anything})

17. Then I Defy You Stars* by @speary - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - So many tears were shed while I read this. The plot is just so amazing and a plot twist to end all plot twists at the end. It's full of sacrifice and love and angst and bittersweet moments. I love this fic (and I promise you will too.)

18. All the Nights by @NorthernSparrow - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This takes place after 15x03 episode "Golden Time". A bit of a fix it fic, but canon compliant to a point. I really love this fic (I love anything written by NorthernSparrow). Also a case!fic, which I'm always a softie for. Some big questions that I have since season 15 are addressed in this fic, and I absolutely love the way they are answered.

19. A Winter's Tale* by @NorthernSparrow - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Oh my gosh. So much Hurt!Castiel. There isn't outright Destiel but there is heavy DeanCas relations. This is a season 9 re write and it just hurts so much. If you can make it through all the pain, the happy ending makes it all worth it. Human!Cas just deserves so much better... Ahh! It's just so sad and perfect and awesome.

20. Give All My Secrets Away by @morganoconner - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - This is a sweet little fic. Not particularly long, but oh so meaningful. Dean gets cursed and his soul is pushed from his body, leaving him vulnerable and scared (the author portrays the human soul in a very interesting way). Cas looks after him and it's just so fluffy.

21. Plot Holes* by @saltyfeathers - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Holy crap! This fic took me a whole week to finish and I enjoyed every minute of it! Every chance I got I would pull my phone out and read. I was rudely interrupted many many times so I just decided to finish it at night and stayed up until 2AM on a school night. (oops?) It's soooo well written and feels like an actual season of Supernatural. 12/10 all the way.

22. Someone Who's Feeling For Me by @ellispark - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: Here's a fic to kick you right in the feels. I actually really genuinely enjoyed reading this fic because of how well the characters are written! Dean, Sam, and Cas run into Lisa Braeden post her mind wipe in season 6 and it brings up a whole bunch of drama for our boys. (While also helping Dean realize that she was never really the person he wanted to be with 😉) A bit of light smut and a bit of angst but definitely worth a read.  

23. Chalk and Chainmail by @angelwingsandthings - Wattpad.

Thoughts : Oh this one is so good... It's very angsty at times and Dean is a lovable dork who can't win no matter what he does and Cas is just a confused little assbutt who doesn't know what to do with himself. (So he's himself if we're being perfectly honest here 😂) There's some light smut but nothing too graphic. This one is a Highschool!AU, so prepare yourself for the delightful drama that comes along with teenage hormones. (And Charlie is a total QUEEN and I'm living for it. I love her so much.)

24. Remember When * by @VioletHaze - Archive of Our Own

Thoughts: Sooo... I've been on a bit of a School!fic kick recently. (Not a little bit. Like a lot a bit thb) This one is just so god da*n perfect (scuse my French) Dean and Cas have been best friends since fifth grade; they do everything together. Then some crap happens and they get in a huge fight junior year. Years later, they finally make it back to each other. (*Cries in fangirl*) Warning, it's sad, it hurts like heck. But there's also so many perfect moments. I promise you won't regret reading it. (And once again Charlie is a total queen and I would give my life for her. She deserves so much better... {SPN writers I'm looking at you.})

25. Everytown, USA by @aileenrose - Archive Of Our Own.

Thoughts : I've seen this fic on tons of recs but never really thought much of it. But I kept seeing it so I decided to give it a read and boy was it worth it! This is just a great fic that has plenty of fluff (And angst... Because what's a Destiel fic without sadness and pain?) Cas is a lot different from his character in the show but somehow the exact same? He's Cas, but it's like he's what Cas would have been like if he had grown up human. I just love him so much in this fic (and I want to give him a hug too... 😢)

26. I Through My Window by @dehavilland - Live Journal.

Thoughts: I've seen this fic on several recs and I finally got around to reading it myself. Some ample Destiel angst to hit you right in the feels. But I love this fic because it is incredibly motivating! Post season 5 canon-divergent and Castiel is permanently rendered human. Dean is a ginormous penis head and leaves Cas to fend for himself. Cas pines after him for a while before realizing that he doesn't need Dean to live his life. Cas stans will love this one. I just gotta include a quote because it's just beautiful. "No, I don't need you. But I want you."  

27. A Light for My Path* by @domesticadventures - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts : Oh my goodness. This fic is just... *chefs kiss* Told from the perspective of Cas' Continental. (A.K.A "Connie") Dean and Cas are having a difficult time figuring out who they want to be after the end of the last The-End-Of-Times-We're-All-Gonna-Die, but they figure it out together. There are plenty of Impala!pov fics (and even an actual episode), but I don't think I've ever come across one from Connie's perspective. Definitely worth a read.

28. Named* by @RC_McLachlan - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts : Hooo boy. This fic.... This is a complete season five re write and I LOVE IT. It's pretty angsty, but it also has some funny times thrown in. Dean is a sassy girl the whole time and I love him so much. And the plot twist at the end literally blew my mind. (brains splattered on the ceiling and everything.) 12/10.

29. And Even In The Quiet Night by @KelpietheThundergod - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: Okay, this one is pretty sad. Not full on angst, but more fluffy sad. (If that makes sense...) Dean wants to celebrate Christmas but no one else seems interested. I just want to wrap Dean in a blanket and sing Hey Jude until he feels better! But don't worry, an absolute beautifully written cliche and sappy ending will make up for it.

30. Just More of the Same (*??) by @outpastthemoat - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts : There really aren't words to describe this series. It's just so fricken bleak but beautiful at the same time. I really don't know how to describe it. Read it, the only regret is that it ends. I honestly hated how it ended, so unfullfilling. But, that's life sometimes, and I think that's the whole point of the series. I don't know if I love it or hate it but there's no denying that it is absolutely beautifully written. 12/10

31. the cost of a thing**by @quiettewandering - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: Hooo boy! This is a great fic! Fake marriage? Check. Slow burn? Check. Case!fic? Check. Fluff and angst? Check. This fic has it all. This fic kicked me right in the feels. My gosh, beautifully written and the characterization is FLAWLESS. But trust me, bring tissues as you watch Dean and Cas, slowly, painfully, but surely heal the trust that was shattered between them. This is an AU for season 8 in which Dean was the one who undertook the trials, not Sam. Dean is dying and there's nothing Sam and Cas can do to stop him, especially since Dean is insistent on just giving up and accepting his fate. Cas can save Dean's life, but at what cost? Surely a terrible one... Angst insues. 10/10.  

32. I'll Dig a Hole and Pull You Through by @JoCarthage - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: If yall hated the DeanCas interaction in season six (didn't we all...?) then this is the fixit!fic for you. In this fic, Dean helps Cas defeat Raphael. And boy, there's some flangst. (Also Dom!Cas is a thing 😏)

33. Stitches by @Askance - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: I wouldn't exactly call this a fixit!fic, buuut it is a sort of fixit for season 7. (Except Cas gets hurt, which I hate. {So does Dean...}) Cas survives the Laviathan taking over his vessal but is rendered blind. Sam and Dean have to take care of him. Loads of whump and hurt/comfort. Definitely shed a tear or two (or twenty.)

34. The Way Out* by @awed_frog - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: *fangirl noises*. I hate to say this, but OMG! This fic blew my frickin mind! The time line is very confusing and the author gives you a way to read it in chronological order, but it's worth it to read the way it was published. Everything starts making sense around the third to last chapter and it is glorious (-ly sad and angsty.) But there is a happy ending and it's soooo worth it. First timetravel!fic I've ever read and it did not disappoint.

35. What is Hidden, What is Seen* by @ExpatGirl.

Thoughts : Wow! This is a pretty long fic but so worth it. The author joked several times about the fact that the fic is longer than her Masters thesis. This is a complete season 11 re write and I LOVE it. It's got some beautifully written OCs, Crowley, Rowena, and a certain someone who needs to come back canonically. (Again, looking at you Spn writers...) This is just written so well and the author was able to put in small Easter eggs the whole way through just like any real season would. Some light smut but nothing too graphic, angst (Hello, my name is angst but you can call me Destiel.) There's even some humour in here too! All in all, an absolutely beautifully written fic.

36. And This, Your Living Kiss*** by @opal_bullets - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: Okay, first off, insert fangirl screams here! I LOVED this fic. (And not just because I'm a clown {which I totally am} but for some personal reasons I'll elaborate on in a sec...) This is an amazingly written, thought-provoking, and heartwarming fic to read. I loved it especially as it featured poet!Dean which I don't find a lot of. Now, I particularly liked this fic because it really hit home for me. The author described exactly how I feel when it comes to poetry. They described how poets often write best in times of sadness and misery and how we often stop writing because we are destroying ourselves in our own heads and can find nothing to write about when we finally allow ourselves to be happy. The author puts it perfectly in this fic. Not only did the fic make me rethink some of the opinions that I've had on poetry writing for years, but it also inspired me to pick up my pen again after not writing for almost a year and a half. So, thank you to the author for getting me back into writing poetry. (I can't thank you enough! ❤️) Please read this fic yall!  

37. What We Remember by @Tiro - Fanfic.net

Thoughts : (Not Destiel btw) Oh my Chuck. This is soooo sad. Some nice emotionallyscarred!Dean for ya. It starts out so unassuming too! Totally blindsided me with the angst. But also some brotherly love between Sam and Dean. Definitely worth a read. (P. S, I'm writing this from the floor of my room while I sob in fangirl.)

38. More or Less by @schmerzerling - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Oh my goodness this is such a great fic. Lots of emotional angst and trauma (Just the way I like it.) This fic is so amazing and I loved every minute of it. There are so few stutter!Dean fics out there. This fic is unfinished and hasn't been updated since 2016 but I think it is still worth a read. The point at which the fic is left off has no immediate cliff hangers so I think that the fic can still be appreciated as is. Definitely worth a read.

39. Every Part of the Animal (*?) by @Askance and @Komodobits - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - I hate this fic. I hate how dam* near perfectly written it is. I hate it for the hours I spent crying. I hate it for the hope it gave me before ripping it away like it was a game. This fic was recommended to me on a group chat. I was warned. I was warned that it was a terrifying, horrific, and heartbreaking fic. What did I do?? I read it anyway. (Shocker, I know...) This fic is genuinely terrifying. It's horrific and I have to say, READ THE THE TAGS. Beautifully written, as to be expected by the authors. (Both of whom have featured on this list before.) This is a case fic gone horribly, horrifically, disgustingly wrong. 10/10 would recommend, but be warned: there is NOT a happy ending.

40. Hautley's Bend **** by @ColdInTheStudio - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Okay! So, first of, if you aren't into long fics this is absolutely NOT the fic for you. A whopping 42 chapters, all masterfully written without a flaw or typo in sight. I LOVE this fic with all my heart. I mean, I'm an absolute clown when it comes to Highschool!AUs, but this fic is just... *chef's kiss. * This is the Highschool!fic you have all been wanting. It's got angst, it's got fluff, emotional trauma, not to mention some fan favourite characters. (Gabriel, Charlie, and Kevin to name just a few.) But you should check out the tags before reading as there's some heavy stuff dealt with in this fic: Dean is not a very nice person at the beginning of this fic. There's also underage drinking and detailed substance abuse. Self harm is also pretty prominent in this fic as well as some A+ John Winchester parenting. But the pain is so, so worth it. Bring tissues!

41. Stay With Me, Sweetheart by @MandalaRose - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - The fluff is too much! I mean, we got firefighter!Dean saving Cas' life! (For Chuck's sake...What more could you ask for?) Also some single father Cas caring for a baby Clair, so some cute daddy!Cas for your troubles. So sweet and heartwarming and a very happy ending. 10/10.

42. Season Z*** by @Castielslostwings, @CR Noble, @cutelittlekitty, @EllenOfOz, @fangirlingtodeath513, @heylittleangel, @jscribbles, @MalMuses, and @son_of_a_bitch_spn_family - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts - So you might notice that there are LOTS of authors listed above and they all came together to create something beautiful. They started publishing chapters right after the season 14 finale and published a chapter every week until the season 15 premier. This is, essentially, a complete season 15 re write. It is masterfully done! Team Free Will vs. a zombie apocalypse. Also, lots and lots of old faces all brought together to save the world one last time. There's some heartbreak, some love, some smut, some fluff. (Also some Samwena to make everything even better.) 22 long chapters, each feeling like an actual episode, made this fic seem like an actual season. (And I wish the writers would steal from this fic's finale and make some... stuff... finally canon.) Truly a timeless Destiel masterpiece.

43. Something about Pinneaples by @lizleenimbus - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - This is an EXTREMELY adorable little DeanCas ficlet. No angst, no Big Sad ™, just sweet sweet, tooth rotting Destiel fluff.

44. Last Night on Earth by @the_communist_unicorn - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Sooo, I'm sure we all remember that disastrous night out, when the first big ol Apocalypse was gearing up, and Dean found out that Cas was an eons-old virgin... And I'm sure we all remember the disaster that was Cas and a prostitute. Anyways, here's what might have happened if Dean had taken a bit more of a... hands on approach. 😏 The chapters are all episodes that took place after the season five episode "Free To Be You And Me" and how they would have unfolded had Destiel become canon. I will warn you, their is smut (easily skippable) and there is DEFINITELY some angst. The whole thing is capped off with a bittersweet alternate ending to season five finale "Swan Song." I can't say much else without spoiling the ending, but all in all it is a very good fic to read.

45. Painted Angels *** by @WinJennster - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- HOLY FRAHOLY. I love this fic. A beautiful take on the classic trope of "We Had Something Good But I Ruined It, Now I'm Gonna Show Up Twelve Years Later And Try To Fix It... Also You're Engaged To Someone Else. Oops?" But seriously, all joking aside, this is an awesome fic. Painter!Dean x Writer!Cas, a match made in Heaven. (Hehe, get it? Heaven? Sorry I'll leave.) HOWEVER, do please be mindful of the tags. There is mentions of suicide and a couple paragraphs describing a rather grizzly accident to one of the main characters. Also, some lovely A+ John Winchester Parenting ™ and several instances of homophobic language. Still, this is an amazingly written fic and I can't stress how much I enjoyed it.  

46. Forgotten *** by @NorthernSparrow - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- So, first off, I have to talk about the author for a little bit. I have read every single fic by Northern Sparrow and EVERY SINGLE ONE is a friggin masterpiece. The amount of research and backstory that goes into these fics is truly awe-inspiring. Northern Sparrow leaves no plot holes, no mistakes, no typos, nada. Now, the actual fic in question is no exception. While not particularly a Destiel fic, it can be taken as pre slash. There is a sequel, a Destiel version and a non Destiel version, called Flight that I am currently reading as well. (The Destiel version of course 🤡) There is some serious whump and angst here, both physical and emotional. This fic is a canon divergent from around mid season 9, in which there is no Mark of Cain and is a continual re write of the season. Cas goes through a lot in this fic (my poor baby) and Dean and Sam go through some gnarly stuff as well. This is such a good fic, I really can't stress enough. I wish I was half as talented as Northern Sparrow is when it comes to writing stories. I promise, you will NOT be disappointed. 12/10

47. All is safely gathered in by @randomdestielfangirl - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Here is a cute little coda for season 12 episode 6, “Celebrating the Life of Asa Fox.” It’s mostly Mary-centric and her understanding of the Dean/Cas relationship. I’ve always had a soft spot for season 12 codas where Mary sees that Dean and Sam have grown up. (Especially those that have DeanCas in them.)

48. Bring Up the Deep by @deathbanjo - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Here is a pretty cool case!fic with eventual Destiel fluff at the end. The story line is a little heavy and dark, but nothing more than canon-typical violence. This involves Sam, Dean, and a human Cas traveling to the beach to investigate a “sea monster.” Fair warning, there are moments describing Cas’ depression and struggle with figuring out who he is and who he wants to be, but again, not as bad as season 9... (STILL not forgiving the writers for that fiasco.)

49. Hazy Shade of Winter by @GeekPrincess - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Here is yet another case!fic. This one has Team Free Will and Mary teaming up to solve a case in rural Wyoming in the middle of winter. It takes place not too long after Mary’s resurrection and Sam being freed from the British Men of Letters. At first it seems to be just a normal case, but per Winchester fashion, someone ends up getting attacked. Definitely worth a read.  

50. A Little Old Fashioned by @theheartchoice - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Another coda, sorry... (I’ve been going through a faze) This one takes place in the aftermath of 14x13 episode “Lebanon.” I was disappointed that Cas didn’t play that big of a role in the 300th episode. I thought for sure he would considering he WASN’T EVEN IN THE 200TH EPISODE. *Clears throat* Umm, ya. Just some Destiel fluff of Cas taking care of Dean’s wounds the old fashioned way after John’s departure.  

51. Same Deep Water by @braezenkitty - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Team Free Will heads to California to investigate a string of mysterious deaths in a supposedly haunted hotel called the Brookdale Lodge, nestled in the redwoods of Santa Cruz. I particularly enjoyed this fic because it has a definite early SPN vibe. Very creepy and eerie and reminded me a lot of No Exit (2x06) and Playthings (2x11). Also a bit of flirty!Cas and jealous!Dean.  

52. Looking for a Sign* by @emwebb17 - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- THIS FIC... is sooo adorable. Holy Chuck. Dean meets Cas on his bus ride to work and tries to talk with him. Not realizing that Cas is deaf, Dean just assumes he’s being ignored and goes out of his way to get Cas to interact with him. After weeks of no response he finally realizes that Cas can’t hear him and so Dean offers that they start over with their acquaintanceship. Dean meets all of Cas’ friends and they quickly grow closer and closer. They would be perfect for each other except Cas refuses to date hearing people. (Also, bonus points for the pun in the title.)

53. Peanut Butter-Pumpkin Wedding Cake by @Sparseparsley - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- I’ve seen this fic on so many rec lists and I’m so mad that it took me this long to finally read it. Bartender!Dean meets Cas at a bachelor party and they hit it off right away. Then, when Cas’ car breaks down, Dean offers to drive him around to make preparations for the upcoming wedding. Dean has a massive crush, but thanks to Dean’s remarkable ability to jump to conclusions, he thinks that Cas is the one getting married in 2 weeks. Read it just for the sake of watching two idiots dance around each other for weeks on end. They aren’t fooling anyone but themselves.  

54. My Marble Guardian by @LadyDrace - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Bring tissues cuz this one hurts like a season 12 finale. (Heh. I’m hilarious.) Dean is killing himself trying to support little Sam after their parents die. Dean is close to ending it all and takes to talking to the marble angel statue that sits by his mother’s grave. I can’t say much else without spoiling the ending so you’ll have to read it yourself to find out how it ends.  

55. The Law of Equivalent Exchange** by @awed_frog - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Holy crap! This fic is truly amazing. @awed-frog is one of my favourite authors of all time. (And has featured on this rec list before.) This fic follows Castiel caring for his ward, a man who will one day be called Dean Winchester. Follow Cas through Rome, Greece, Paris, Russia, Germany, and more as he guides the impossibly bright soul that Heaven claims will one day save them all. In other words, Cas is sent to earth to watch over Dan, son of Enoch and continues to do so until January 24th, 1979, the day Dean Winchester is finally born. The fic then becomes canon-compliant all the way until season 11, then stems into a canon-divergent for defeating Amara. All from Cas’ POV, we see how he went from being Castiel, Angel of Tears and Thursdays to Cas, Angel of Dean Winchester. 12/10.  

56. A Way Back Home* by @thatpeculiarone - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Another AU with deaf!Cas. Dean is a lonely bakery owner whose past is full of heartbreak and loss. He meets Clair Novak, a mute girl who has no one to talk to, after Jody suggests that they meet. Neither are too keen on the idea at first, but they soon discover a perfect remedy for their predicament. Dean loves to tell stories and Clair loves to hear them. Dean has a story for every pastry in his bakery, and Clair soon realizes that all of Dean’s stories seem to revolve around one person. After finally discovering why Dean always looks sad when no one is looking, hates Valentines Day with a passion, and only ever talks about his best friend in the past tense, Clair is determined to help Dean get the happily-ever-after that he never got to have.  

57. Such Familiar Magic by @saltnhalo - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- This fic was inspired by the artwork of very talented @lizleeships here on Tumblr. This is the first witch AU I’ve ever read and it did not disappoint. Cas is a reclusive witch with unimaginable power and Dean is one of the most powerful familiars in North America. Both of our boys have some dark secrets and ghosts from their pasts threaten to separate the two for good.

58. I'm fine by @lizleenimbus - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Can I just say, WOW. This one is yet another small ficlet to go along with @lizleeships artwork. This fic, despite its short length, is so potent and amazing! The writer effortlessly blends the canon SPN with the world of Destiel and I am LIVING for it. The somber and quiet nature of this fic makes it an excellent read for a late at night fanfic session.

59. The Shadows on his Shoulders by @lizleenimbus (Yes, I know. Two in a row... I don't care.)- Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Okay, first off, @lizleenimbus has become one of my favourite fic writers EVER. This fic is canon compliant (sort of) for season 6, just when Dean is beginning to figure out that something is wrong with Sam. (In the soul department, that is.. .) This here is a wingfic to end all wingfics. I love the writing, the characterization, the plot, everything, just... *chefs kiss.*

60. The Care and Feeding of Castiel by @MalMuses - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Soooo, another wingfic!! (No, I don't have a problem. YOU have a problem...) I am a total sucker for wing!grooming DeanCas fics. I just, gosh! I love them so much! I love this fic more every time, no matter how many times I've read it before.  

61. Asunder by @rageprufrock - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Now, listen here lil clowns. Everyone loves a good "I need a plus one for my brother's wedding" trope and this here fic is the perfect one. And if you don't love it, this is absolutely NOT the fic for you. Sam is getting married and Dean doesn't want to go to it alone, so he enlists the company of his best friend Cas to go with him. Shenanigans and misunderstandings ensue, topped off with a healthy serving of meddling family members. A great rainy afternoon read.

62. Good Call by @sysrae - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - First, please be mindful of the tags as Dean meets Cas by talking him off of a ledge. However, despite the horrible start, this series is still incredibly fluffy and sappy. It also has Therapist!Benny being exasperated by Dean and Cas' utter stupidity around each other. This is a very heartwarming fic that balances the angst with fluff perfectly.

63. 'Tis but a Crush by @Annie D - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Here is an awesome little meet cute modern AU fic! Cas notices that a man with startling green eyes stares at him whenever they are together. Cas is interested immediately but the green eyed man seems too shy to approach Cas. Fluff and awkward moments soon follow.

64. Where There's Smoke, Theres Fire** by @OsirisApollo - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - So, first of, I am absolutely in LOVE with Firefighter!Dean. Cas is an ER doctor who meets Dean after the fire alarm in his apartment building goes off. Cas manages to make a fool of himself but is comforted by the fact that he'll never see the attractive firefighter again. Boy, was Cas wrong. The two men seem to run into each other practically everywhere, and no matter how hard Cas tries, he always seems to embarrass himself with every meeting. This fic was responsible for making me squeal aggressively at 2 AM. 10/10 Destiel fluff.

65. Forget - Me - Not -Blues*** by @noangelsinthegarrison - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- This is a fic that I go back and read over and over again. It’s got a perfect balance of fluff and angst, misunderstandings, and a healthy dose of clueless, meddling family and friends. Bottom line is, Sam is getting married and Dean is going to be the best man. He’s thrilled, until he finds out that Castiel Novak is Jess’ honorary Maid of Honour. Dean and Cas had a... something or other back in high school. Dean would ask to be friends again but Cas is intent on pretending that they never knew each other in the first place. Misunderstandings, awkward moments, and an obscene amount of embarrassment ensues, no thanks at all to the “tradition” surrounding the Maid of Honour and the Best Man. 10/10.  

66. Ignore the Butterflies: Best Friend Advice from Dean Winchester by @impatient14 - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Okay, this one has practically every romcom trope out there... AND I AM LIVING FOR IT. (*Clears throat) Ya, soooo. Doctor Cas and Firefighter Dean are friends. Best friends actually. Totally platonic bros. A bromance for the ages. The broist bros to ever bro. That’s it. No homosexual feelings to be found here. None at all... Or so Dean tries to convince himself.  

67. Prosopagnosia by @misseditallagain - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Man, this fic is really adorable and quite heartbreaking at times. Cas has a cognitive disorder that means he can’t ever remember faces. He’s given up on finding love until he meets one Dean Winchester, but he’s afraid to tell his hot date the truth about his condition. Assumptions are made and misunderstandings threaten to tear the two apart for good, but maybe there’s a chance for these two after all.  

68. Midnight Blues AKA To Hell and Back (Courtesy of Sig Sauer) by @outofminutes - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- As we all know, I am a glutton for damaged!Dean being cared for by Cas. Dean is a war veteran. He’s been discharged for five years but he hasn’t dared to go back home until now. He’s not the same person he was all those years ago and the constant haunting of horrors past threaten to tear him apart. Thankfully, he’s got a loving family and a new friend (Hehe. Guess who. Sorry, I’ll leave) to help him pick up the pieces.  

69. Scars by @lemonsorbae - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Okay, first off: WOOOO 69! NOICE! OKay, I’m done... So, this fic stands out to me for the writers unique take on some popular tropes. Dean is a tattoo artist with green hair (Insert Priestly from Ten Inch Hero here.) and Cas is the stereotypical hipster. They don’t get along very well at the beginning of this fic. (Which is a HUGE understatement btw). Then, a drunken party leads to certain... unsavory actions, and both swear that it will never happen again. And that’s a total lie. Lots of smutty times in this one so be warned, also references to past trauma for both of our favourite boys so please mind the tags before reading.  

70. The One Thing You Can’t Lose by @MajorEnglishEsquire - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- This is just a cuddly, tooth-rottingly fluffy little ficlet for some happy DeanCas feels. Warning: Do not read in public place for there WILL be squeals.  

71. The Ugly Sweater Verse by @nerdylittledude - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- I know, I know. Everyone who’s ever read Destiel fanfiction has heard of the Ugly Sweater Verse. I don’t care! I’m reccing it anyway. A newly human Castiel wants to experience every holiday to its fullest, dragging Dean and Sam (But mostly Dean) along with him. This is an AU for after season 5 in which Sam is alive, Cas is human, and Dean finally gets his head out of his ass. (With a little... okay a lot of help from the rest of Team Free Will.) This is an awesome feel-good Verse that is always nice to read after a bad day. There is a prequel to this Verse that is stand-alone, but you don’t have to read it to get the rest of the Verse. (Also, if you’re only looking for fluffy times then I wouldn’t recommend reading the prequel. You have been warned.)

72. Cats and Tats by @Jemariel - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- This here is the quintessential Coffee Shop AU that no one asked for (Well.. I asked for it. I’m lonely dammit)  Cas owns a coffee shop that is right next door to a tattoo shop owned by our own Dean Winchester. Dean doesn’t like the pastel coffee shop because it totally ruins his badassery vibe, and Cas doesn’t need another distraction like Dean, and poor Sam never gets a moments peace.  

73. Moving On by @BruisedCastiel - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Castiel is a witch who reads fortunes for a living. One day he gets a customer named Dean whose reading has a shocking outcome. Not too much later, Dean’s ghost comes looking for Castiel seeking answers. This fic starts out pretty sad and things look hopeless for Dean and Cas but don’t worry! There’s a happy ending.  

74. Into the Fire** by @NorthernSparrow- Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- I’ve mentioned on this list before that NorthernSparrow is my favourite fic writer of all time. And their work has been featured several times on this list before. Now, be warned. This fic gets VERY dark VERY quickly. Dean, shortly after the Mark of Cain is removed, is cursed and he kills Cas. The trauma of the Mark, the guilt he feels for killing Cas, and the looming threat of the Darkness sends Dean into a mental breakdown. Sam, mourning the loss of Cas himself, is left to try and put together what is left of Dean’s sanity AND to come up with a plan to defeat the Darkness. Sam and Dean, with the help of several allies, come together to save the universe once and for all. This is a full AU starting sometime in early season 11 and finishes all the way through the end of the season. There is a lot of sadness and guilt in this fic, so please be careful going into it. Bring tissues. I cried gratuitously throughout this fic. But don’t worry because THERE IS A HAPPY ENDING. Bonus points for TrueForm!Cas. 15/10.  

75. There’d Be No Distance by @imogenbynight - Archive Of  Our Own.  

Thoughts- Just a short, feel-good, fluffy Christmas fic for ya. Cas is lonely on New Years because he assumes that he won’t be welcome to the family get-together. But don’t worry! Dean sets the record straight with his angel. (Well...Not straight but... you know what I mean.)  

76. Imperfect Proposals by @Fallen_Angel_Meg - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Okay, so, Cas is a total jerk at the beginning of this fic. He’s demanding, arrogant, cruel, and just rude to practically everyone who works at his firm. Dean is his new assistant and needs this job if he’s ever going to make it as an architect, but Castiel isn’t making it easy for him. Things get more complicated when Cas is threatened with being deported so he says that Dean is his fiance. Dean isn’t on board until Cas threatens to fire him if he doesn’t play along. Now they just  have to make it through Sam and Jess’ wedding. Easy... Right?  (There IS a happy ending it just takes these two idiots a while to get there.)

77. The Novak Hickey Mystery by @FagurFiskur - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- This is just a short ficlet involving Professor Novak’s mysterious relationship and some VERY nosy students. Nice and quick happy-go-lucky fic with no angst and plenty of tooth rotting fluff.  

78. Come Back* by @lizleenimbus - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is yet another short, canon-verse ficlet for you guys. (I know these last couple fics have been pretty short but I have been reading so many long fics recently that I’ve needed a bit of a mental break from the stress of a slow burn lol) Anyways, this is one of my favourite authors. Literally, every single thing by this author is a freaking gold mine of Destiel goodness. This particular ficlet chronicles Dean and Cas sharing an intimate conversation after a particularly nasty hunt. I love these types of fics in which Dean and Cas actually Use There Words™ and talk like Grown Ups™. (Never happens canonically so I’ll take what I can get. Looking at you SPN writers.) ALSO, this has artwork also by  @lizleeships! I swear, this individual is too frickin talented. 10/10!

79. And then there were Six* by @lizleenimbus - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- I know, I know. Two in a row by the same author... This author rocks okay! (Seriously, go check them out) This right here is a wing fic my friends. But not the type we are used to. It involves a bashful Cas, flustered Dean (And I know we ALL love a flustered Dean), and a very amused little brother. I love this ficlet especially as it is a beautiful take on the fact that Seraphim are supposed to have six wings.  

80. Autrement, Danger - or, The Account of an Exceedingly Long Day by @awed_frog - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Here’s another fic from a “rec list favourite” author of mine. This is a pretty cool case fic with an awesome monster of the week. (Japanese folklore at its finest.) A creature manifests itself as a person’s true love. Sam sees Jess, Cas sees Dean, Dean sees Cas (And has a freakout along the way.)  

81. Memories Bring Back Memories (Bring Back You) by @sobsicles - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Hoooo Boy! Talk about an angst fest. Set sometime in early season 15, Dean and Cas get their memories wiped and Dean is convinced that they are serial killers on the run from some tall guy named Sam. Things get awkward when they get their memories back, as they also remember what the two of them did when they were on the run together. Dean talks out of his ass, Cas gets angry (rightfully so), Sam and Eileen just want a moments peace, and LOTS of bad blood gets let out out into the open for the first time in years. This fic was hard to read because, true to Winchester fashion, Dean and Cas’ communication during this fic is TERRIBLE. Just when you think the two of them are about to hash things out, one of them goes and says something stupid and they have to start all over again. I definitely recommend this fic, but be prepared to brave some hardcore angst before Dean and Cas get their happy ending.  

82. Lost in Words, Hand in Hand* by @hallowgirl - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- This is the fluffiest fluffy fic to ever fluff! (Try saying that 10 times fast.) Dean tells Cas that he never got read to as a child, so Cas takes it upon himself to read to Dean. It was supposed to be a one time thing, but the two enjoy the time together more than they thought they would. Plus, there’s so many books to read, and laying in the same bed is just practical. That’s it. Just guys being dudes. And if Dean happens to fall asleep on Cas’ shoulder? Well, that’s not his fault at all. (Also, bonus points for Sam being the typical smug little bro who lets Dean know that he and Cas aren’t as subtle as they think they are.) 

83. La Hantise** by @quiettewandering - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Okay so, I have been waiting to read this fic for FOREVER. I read the first couple chapters a long time ago (back when it was still a WIP) and I immediately fell in love. I decided, rather painfully, to stop reading and save it to my Marked For Later until it was finished. I have a hard time when it comes to WIPs because I forget what I read during the previous update and I often times lose interest until I can read it all in one go. I couldn’t wait to read it and I was not disappointed! This fic is BEAUTIFULLY written and the story seems to come to life before your eyes. This is the Destiel we all fell in love with; Two damaged and broken beings finding peace within each other. Warning: these two are complete idiots and there’s a lot of pining and some pretty hefty angst. Castiel’s backstory is truly, completely and utterly, tragic. Dean’s isn’t a picnic either I suppose, but it’s Cas past that comes back to haunt Dean and Cas in this fic. The author seamlessly interweaves the reality with the make believe and it sucks the reader into the story effortlessly. 14/10. A Destiel classic.  

84. Cheers, Angel Eyes by @wannaliveindeansdimples - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- As I’m sure you all know by now, I am in love with bartender! and barista!Dean. This fic has a healthy dose of bartender!Dean for you. In this fic, Castiel, known to Dean only as Angel Eyes, is a regular at the bar that Dean owns. The two hit it off during the few conversations that they have and decide to give themselves a chance. Very minimal angst and only just a small bit of pining from Dean’s POV. A very good, quick, none painful read.  

85. best friends without benefits by @lizbobjones - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- This fic is set between the end of season 11 and the beginning of season 12 and is canon divergent for the most part. This one is pretty funny and enjoyable to read, if only for the sake of poor Sam and Mary dealing with two complete idiots. Dean lets slip to Cas that he finds Cas driving Baby “hot” and Cas admits that he has known of Dean’s attraction for years. Cas proposes he and Dean enter a Friends With Benefits relationship and Dean just can’t say no. But Dean just digs himself deeper and deeper into trouble after he mistakes Cas’ preposition as a rejection of deeper feelings. Misunderstandings happen, Dean is a big baby, Cas is clueless, and Sam is stuck in the middle.  

87. Shifter by @@LadyLini - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- There are tons and tons of fics out there where Dean and Cas are the bumbling idiots of the story (Yes, just like in the show) and Sam is the one who has everything figured out. But this fic looks at the idea of Sam being the one out of the loop and Dean and Cas being the ones who actually know what the heck is going on. This is a cool AU in which Sam went to Stanford, John Winchester is still an ass hole, and Destiel is canon. This was a cool take on how the events of the show would have taken place if Sam wasn’t there and Cas had been the one to save Dean from Azazel.  

89. diamond star halo by @jad - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- This is a wonderfully light-hearted little fic in which Cas possesses Dean while his vessel recovers from the attack dog spell. We also get some great brotherly banter, Cas and Dean bickering like an old married couple, and other Team Free Will shenanigans. Also, poor Sam.  

90. like moses and batman and james dean by @saltyfeathers - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Oooohh boy. This fic is quite the can of worms for me. Here, the author gives us a more detailed account of Dean’s past of turning tricks in order to raise little Sammy, and how this past is affecting his current relationship with our Wayward Angel. This is a heavier fic and please be mindful of the tags (Yes, John Winchester’s A+ parenting is one of them...) But it DOES have a happy ending.  

91. any port in the storm by @mishcollin - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- If you are looking for a case!fic with Dean and Cas pretending to be dating on a couple’s cruise then you have come to the right place. I love this fic specifically for the care and detail of the case. Even more, there are lots and lots of OCs in this fic and every single one of them has their own personality and backstory. Be warned: there are lots of arguments between the elder Winchester and newly human Castiel. (Most of them because Dean is a big ol idiot in this fic and keeps the possible location of Cas’ fallen grace from him because of his Winchester Fear Of Abandonment ™)

92. Sunset Plaza by @LoveIsNotAVictoryMarch - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Dang! This is a great fic. Cas is practically married to his work and never goes on vacations, so his loving brother Gabriel decides to book him a weekend at a resort. Cas ends up having to share his room with one Dean Winchester the first night due to a problem with the server at the hotel. But they manage to make the best of it (if ya know what I mean...) Everything is great until its time to go home. They could make it work, but our lovable idiots can’t let anything be that easy. (Extra points for a little dash of Sabriel and meddling Gabriel.)

93. Longing by @whelvenwings - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- This is a really fluffy fic set in canonverse. Dean and Cas finally have a discussion that has been long in the making, ending years of mutual pining. The tone of this fic is very sweet and is a great, feel-good, nighttime read. Give me Destiel and Impala confessions and I’m one happy clown.  

94. Hallelujah! Noel! Be it Heaven or Hell by @EnochianThings - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- EnochianThings is one of my favourite fic writers of all time! I can’t believe its taken me this long to rec this fic. This is an angsty holiday fic in which Cas confesses his feelings first and Dean is a total assbutt about it. Dean is at a loss after he realizes that he might of just driven away the one thing that could have made him the happiest: Cas. (Oh, don’t get me started on a rejected Cas... My heart can’t bear his sultry seraphim sadness.)

95. I’ll Cross the Sky for You by @superhoney - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- I am going to start this off by saying that I wasn’t really into this fic at first. I had found it through tags alone and it sat in my Marked for Later for months. I liked the tags, but I wasn’t sure about the premise of the fic. I could NOT have been more wrong. This fic was absolutely adorable. Barista!Dean meets Captain!Castiel... but in space! (With space ships and everything!) Anyways, very adorable, very cute. Definitely worth checking out.  

96. Nepeta Cataria* by @thepopeisdope - Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- I would literally give anything for there to be more Witch!Cas x Familiar!Dean fics out there. This is one of my favourite AUs and I feel like it is so lacking compared to many of the others. In this fic, Cas is a lonesome witch who plants catnip to prevent mosquitoes from being in his garden. Little did he know that it would also attract Dean, a powerful familiar, who just so happens to be the love of Cas’ life. (Familiar!Dean is almost always a dog in the fics I find so it was great to get to see him as a cat. Honestly, Cat Familar!Dean might be my favourite.)

97.Texas State of Mind** by @palominopup – Archive of Our Own. 

Thoughts- This is an awesome fic with country singer Castiel Novak meeting Dean Winchester, a man who was once an award-winning country music star. Dean has a complicated past, as he didn’t leave the industry on a good note (Compliments of John Winchester’s A+ Parenting™) He’s sworn off ever singing again and is content to look after his horses for the rest of his life... That is, until Cas Novak wants to sing a duet. This is an awesome fic with lots of familiar SPN faces. It takes Dean and Cas a little while to come around for each other, but once they do, they’re a fluffy force to be reckoned with.

98. In Real Life by @cloudyjenn – Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- This is a hilarious little meetcute in which Dean has been communicating with this guy online... They’ve never done anything but exchange messages and texts, never even seen each other’s faces, but Dean is pretty sure he’s in love with him. Sam decides that such a relationship is completely pointless if the two will never meet so he introduces his brother to Castiel. Dean thinks he’s hot and would totally go out with him, but he just can’t bring himself to like someone other than his online mystery man. But Cas is fine with Dean not being interested, mostly because there’s this guy he met online who, even though they’ve never met... Aaaand ya. You all can guess where this is going hahaha. But it gets even better when Sam realizes that Dean and Cas are each other’s mystery online crushes and decides to have a little fun with it. 

99. Rentboy by @Naoe – Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Dean Winchester’s life hasn’t been pretty, but he’s happy with it because at least he got Sammy the life and opportunities he wanted. Dean’s life takes an interesting turn when he meets Castiel at a benefit. Dean, ashamed of his job, comes up with a new name and a new life story for this strange man. Somehow, the two form an unlikely bond, Dean supporting Castiel as his wife is dying. But the lie Dean told is still there and he has no idea how to fix it. And once Castiel’s wife is gone, the lie is the only thing keeping them from truly being together. Castiel isn’t in love with Dean Winchester... at least, not the real one. Needless to say, life isn’t easy for a Rent boy in the 80s. 

100. Silver and Cold by @superhoney – Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- Silver and Cold is an amazing AU in which Castiel is a wayward hunter afraid of settling down and a dark past that haunts him everywhere he goes. While on a case investigating a possible werewolf attack, Cas runs into Dean Winchester, a recluse who lives up in the woods of Sydnam, Maine. He’s got a bad temper and a past to rival Cas’. If it weren't for the alarming amount of evidence pointing towards Dean being the werewolf, Cas thinks Dean might just be more kind than he lets people believe. 

101. Any Little Heartbreak* by @followthattardis – Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- This was a fic that I started reading a long time ago, but somehow lost and couldn’t find it again. But I finally found it and the joy I felt was unparalleled. (My little clown heart could barely take it) Dean is a heart surgeon. He’s frickin good at it to... Maybe even one of the best in the US. He knows everything there is to know about the human heart. (“Anatomically speaking”) He’s just transferred to a new hospital and the head nurse is totally hot. And Dean also happens to make a fool of himself in front of said nurse on his very first day at the hospital. From there, it seems that despite his best efforts, Cas doesn’t like Dean at all. (And EVERYONE likes Dean so, what the hell?) Dean thinks his crush will go away if he can just get all that tension out of his system... Boy was he wrong. I LOVE this fic and I am so glad I was able to find it again. I especially liked how all the hospital staff were all familiar faces. 😊 

102. What happened between me and Cas* by @AthenaErrata – Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- This right here?? Broke me. BROKE ME I TELL YOU. (*Clears throat) This is a coda set just after 11x19 episode The Chitters, in which Dean finally tells Sam everything. The secret kisses, stolen touches. The betrayals, the lies, the guilt. Everything. All the things involving Cas that Dean promised himself he would never tell another soul. Dean retells events from seasons 4 to 11 and gives a bit more info into just why he and Cas can never truly be happy together. The fic continues into a canon-compliant tale all the way until a beautiful happy reunion set in 13x06 episode Tombstone. 

103. True Faces* by @Tibbins – Archive of Our Own.  

Thoughts- I'm pretty sure that this author has featured on this rec list a couple times before. Tibbins is one of my favourite SPN writers of all time. This is a trilogy verse in which Dean, Sam, and Cas tell some truths that should have been shared a LONG time ago. In the first one, titled “Behind the Mask”, Dean convinces Sam to open up about some things that has been bothering him and Sam finally sheds some light on what it was like being tortured by Lucifer. The second, titled “In the Mind”, follows Dean as he opens up to Sam following the conversation from the first fic. He tells Sam more of what happened in Hell and why he will never really be able to wipe the blood off his hands. The last fic (Which is pre slash Destiel) titled “Under the Skin”, Cas gets to discuss with Dean the things that haunt the angel’s mind. The last one is especially painful... Though the two finally admit their feelings for one another, Dean explains to Cas why he just isn’t ready yet. It’s sad, but it has a hopeful ending.

104. In My Time of Vinyl by @freclesarechocolate - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- First off, damn! This fic is one to pull at your heartstrings. I am a a shameless lover of hurt!Dean and this fic delivers beautifully. Cas, driven to seek shelter from the rain, enters the record shop owned by Dean. Dean is sweet and offers shelter for the night and Cas ends up promising to come back to buy some records. The two create a fast friendship but Cas ends up noticing some things that are a little off with Dean. He’s always smiling, but sometimes the smiles can’t cover up the sadness in his eyes. He doesn’t talk about his family or his past, and he never seems to have a lot of food in his fridge. This is a story of coming to terms with mental health, friendship, love, trust, and letting others help you. I absolutely recommend this fic! Quick warning, however, Dean has a very troubled life and his story is no picnic ride. Be sure to check out the tags before reading.

105. Hunter’s Caress*** by @Ltleflrt - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is probably in my top five most favourite Destiel fics of all time. I have read this fic all the way through at least twice now. The story follows Castiel Jameson, a Pinkerton Detective, who is on a quest to revenge his murdered brother. He seeks the help of the outlaw Dean Winchester, a dangerous man who supposedly has enough blood on his hands to fill an ocean. Cas saves Dean and his brother Sam from being hung in exchange for their assistance in tracking the rat bastard who killed his brother. The two start out as enemies, then to begrudging allies, friend, and maybe even something more. Cas tries to keep his mind on business, but he aches to learn the feeling of a Hunter’s Caress. 20/10. Be warned though, this fic gets pretty gritty. The world of hunters and outlaws is messy and dangerous. This fic deals with death, injury, rape, and worse. Be careful before heading in but I assure you, this fic will not disappoint.

106. Love Bites* by @malmuses - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- MalMuses is one of the best fic writers out there. A true legend in the SPN fandom! This fic is one of my favourite as it features Creature!Dean x Human!Castiel. In this fic, Cas takes in a bat that his cat got a hold of. Cas knows that there’s something special about this bat. He seems to understand human speech and loves hamburgers. But even stranger, his eyes are the exact same green as the cute mechanic who comes into the coffee shop sometimes.

!107-117. All of these are just codas set for post 15x18 and for post finale/finale rewrites. They are pretty much very similar. Dean breaks down and Sam is left to pick up the pieces. Most, if not all, have happy/hopeful endings.

107. Everything is Blue  by @malmuses - AO3

108. Tag to “Despair” by @Alvinola- AO3

109. Time by @Chipper99- AO3

110. When It All Crashes Down by @spacegirlstuff - AO3

111. Through the clouds by @judithhandronicus - AO3

112. Because it is by @60r3d0m - AO3

113. the burden of belonging by @Newtondale - AO3

114. Counting the days by @WanderUntilLost - AO3

115. The Weight of Silence by @jscribbles - AO3

116. As It Should Be by @Loser_Angel_666 - AO3

117. When you have a home by @Firebog - Archive of Our Own.

118. What’s Left Unsaid (Is Finally Said) by @A_Place_To_Roam - Archive of Our Own. 

119. When you have a future by @Firebog - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is a lovely fic in which Sam succeeds in closing Hell and Castiel is able to board up Heaven. Everyone lives happily-ever-after. No looming Apocalypse, no higher power, no fate. Found family is the only thing that remains. But Dean is left with this strange feeling rolling around in his gut. Like he’s waiting for the next disaster to happen. Meanwhile Sam learns about dog poetry from Castiel, Team Free Will gets pet rabbits (named after porn stars), Dean finally gets his head out of his ass, and Sam learns something shocking about his older brother.

120. Remarkable by @shiphitsthefan - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Castiel’s the new elementary school teacher in town. One of his classmates, one Ben Braeden, has a father who is just as annoying as was promised. Dean’s “helpful” books and readings he brings Castiel about being more socially aware get easily dismissed as overly-involved-parent-crap. But that all changes after Castiel reads Ben Braeden’s essay assignment.

121. (Dis) Affection by @justkeeponwriting - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - This fic!!!!! This fic is soo frickin adorable. Dean and Cas’ nosy friends set them up on a blind date. Neither of them is very happy so they devise an epic plan of revenge. Act like the most disgustingly in love couple ever and then have a terrible public breakup. Hopefully their friends will feel so guilty that they never try to set the two up again. The plan goes amazingly. Dean and Cas find it easy to fake being a newly in love couple... Almost too easily.

122. Uniform of a Winchester******** by @monsterfuckerdean - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Its fics like these that I think set the SPN fandom apart from others. The thought put into these works makes them so real, so painstakingly relatable, make the characters come to life both on screen and in words. This is a heartbreaking character study of Dean Winchester. The author gives the reader a glimpse into the backstory behind Dean’s jewelry. The skull bracelet given to him by Missouri, the ring given to him by a childhood friend named Lee Webb, and more. This fic will break your heart. And if you’re like me, you won’t be able to find another fic that comes anywhere close to it. (If you do, please give it to me.) I’ve read this fic many times over. I take this fic as canon, completely and utterly. Dean Winchester is written so perfectly that the writers of the show are frickin jealous.

123. In Someone Else’s Life by @blue_morning - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- A classic Destiel wedding trope! Cas, along with his obnoxious-but-lovable brother Gabriel, accidentally crash a stranger’s wedding. Cas meets Jessica, the lucky bride, along with Sam, the best man. But its the groom with beautiful green eyes that Castiel can’t take his eyes off of. Assumptions are made, embarrassment ensues, and maybe... just maybe, happily ever afters do really happen.

124. Nobody’s Fault But Mine by @peanutbutterjelly-pie - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Oh! the fluff! Its killing me. Cas meets Dean and Sam Winchester. Both ridiculously attractive and both total sweethearts. But Castiel finds himself falling for Sam, the older brother with the beautiful green eyes. Too bad he’s getting married to Jessica in a few weeks... Tee hee hee. It’s glorious.

[very-grownup]

THE YEAR IS 2020 AND I WATCHED NEON GENESIS EVANGELION FOR THE FIRST TIME, PART 9

Episode 21.

Suddenly it's a found footage shakey cam horror movie. I think it's meant to be footage of ... NERV before it was NERV labs in 2000 with some bad shit happening. I'm unclear of so much in this episode, guys.

There is one of those blue screens with the white text that warns you that if you make copies of this you will go to jail for a million years, though, which feels nice and nostalgic before we get into the opening credits. (Opening? Still a bop. Thank you, '90s.)

Episode 21 continues behind the cut.

Someone has been kidnapped from NERV, possibly by or because of Kaji (fuckin' Kaji), and because all these NERV people are interchangeable except for Misato, Ritsuko, and Shinji's horrible father, I have no idea who it is until we see the old dude who is usually behind Ikari. He's tied to a chair in a black void, surrounded by an increasing number of numbered obelisks who I think are the old man Simon council but instead of projecting as old men they're ... obelisks. Look, their government is run by supercomputers named after the Magi. This is as fine as anything.

The obelisks don't like Commander Ikari (same) or what he's doing (same) and want Number 2 to explain what's going on (same) due to the Dead Sea Scrolls and their desire not to create god (... same?). Which means it's time for BACKSTORY or as close as this show gets to backstory.

Number 2 used to be a scientist/academic at ... a school ... lab ... university ... somewhere ... where he met a promising young student of ... science stuff ... named Ikari. There's some sentence vagaries to make the audience think the student is a young Commander Ikari but PSYCH, it's /Yui/, Shinji's mysteriously dead mother. This is not a big surprise, because no one would be anticipating meeting Gendo Ikari. What is a surprise is that Yui Ikari is currently single, although if you've consumed enough Japanese media you've probably encountered cases where a husband takes the wife's surname and is adopted into her family when there's no sons in the family (Summer of the Ubume). ANYWAY Yui is currently single and Number 2 talks to her about her post-graduation career plans, failing to consider that maybe she wants to get married and start a family. Find your own path and all that but also: this is a woman who is going to make terrible life choices.

I don't know why, but as a favour to Yui, Number 2 goes to spring an absolute piece of shit ... fellow student? from the drunk tank after he got arrested for brawling and it is, of course, Gendo Originalsurnamewhocareshesucks. We see him without his glasses for the first time. Even though this is ~15 years ago, Gendo without his glasses is the worst thing ever, rivaling yes the EVA with the giant white human teeth ripping an Angel apart and screaming. I hate looking at him, his cheeks sunken and his eyes huge, very like a skull. The real thesis material in Evangelion is: why has anyone ever slept with this awful gaunt uncharming skull man? He has the visage and personality of someone whose genetic line should die with him.

On a nature walk (because this is before seasons are destroyed by the second impact [and this is a really pretty scene, too, all fall leaves and oranges and red, more vibrant yet gentle than the series often is]) Yui reveals to Number 2 that she and Gendo are in a relationship. Why? Look, that's some Dead Sea Scrolls bullshit, learn ancient Hebrew and get into archeology, unearth some tablets, figure it out for yourselves.

The Second Impact happens and destroys Antarctica and Misato's father and she becomes mute for a while after this and also is kept in a featureless hospital cell for observation with a few age appropriate toys for company and for some reason this doesn't help her mental trauma. No wonder her roommate's a penguin.

The Misato flashback may seem like it comes out of nowhere and if so /hey welcome to my experience of this episode/ where I mostly had my hands on my forehead like I needed to reinforce my brain to process everything.

Number 2 and Shitty Gendo are in Antarctica after the Second Impact with the neon pink ocean and the none ice and oh Gendo and Yui got married. Surprise! Gendo and Yui or Gendo through Yui are involved in something called Seele which is the thing that becomes NERV I think. What's going on /shut up I don't know/ there's some kind of secret science government military organization and it involves the Ikari and then Number 2 and also Ritsuko's mother and underground caverns that may be cities and is this Atlantis? Ancient aliens? Akashic records? I DON'T KNOW Number 2 has concerns and Yui both seems to agree with Number 2's concerns but also is down with whatever Gendo's doing and they have Shinji and he seems like a pretty happy and cute baby and Yui seems to love him even though she brings him to work. And by work I mean the underground lab where they're dissecting or recreating flesh tube skeletons from Adam or building Adam or using Adam to build what will be the Evas, specifically on the day Yui is doing The Experiment. I don't think bringing little Shinji to work is a great idea or a sign of great parenting, especially when The Experiment goes awry and Yui is killed in front of Shinji's toddler eyes.

Ritsuko's mother, Dr. ... Doctor, doesn't approve of kids in the secret mad scientist bunker but MAN does she approve of Yui being killed. Because, somehow, she also wants to fuck Gendo Ikari, a skeleton of emotional abuse and neglect wearing sausage casing as skin.

There's also some stuff here about young Ritsuko (she's not a natural blonde! but honestly the fleeting glimpses of Ritsuko at different ages in this episode show greater awareness of how women can change without just relying on bigger breasts more hair than I'd expect). She and her mother exchange letters where they seem to be more honest with each other than they are in person and I wish there was more time spent dwelling in that, because Evangelion has an imperfect but still insightful view of the complexity of mother-daughter relationships. She goes away to school and meets Misato and they bond and become friends and they each seem to be the other's first friend due to their various issues and weirdness and Ritsuko's clearly at least a little in love with Misato. Unfortunately, Misato is dating Kaji (fuckin' Kaji) and Dr. Doctor thinks Kaji is a pretty great catch, but like ... Dr. Doctor wants to fuck or possibly is fucking Gendo Ikari, so if you can think of a great condemnation of Kaji than this, I'd love to hear it (fuckin' Kaji).

Misato and Ritsuko both join Seele or NERV or whatever the fuck these secret awful organizations are currently calling themselves, with Misato going to Germany and Ritsuko starting to work with her mother and also seeing her mother just jamming her tongue down Gendo's throat. Truly, Ritsuko could never understand her mother as a woman and neither can we, because /why would you desire Gendo Ikari/ and his judgmental touch, icy even through fucking Mickey Mouse gloves.

SO ONE DAY Gendo comes to work with a young Rei and I guess since Yui died no one has seen Shinji since people are looking at Rei and going 'oh is this your son?' and 'I thought you had a son, not a daughter'. But no, Rei is the daughter of a friend Gendo is looking after. Imagine thinking 'Gendo Ikari has even a single friend' is a believable lie.

Since Yui's death, no one has bothered to institute any kind of secret underground lab rules about kids on the premises, because while Dr. Doctor is doing some shit with her O. Henry super computers, little Rei wanders in and proceeds to neg the shit out of this grown woman. They're obviously not the words of a child and it's been clear since the beginning that there's something Not Right about Rei, but when she tells Dr. Doctor that she's a sexually undesirable hag and a nagging shrew and has outlived her purpose they're the words of a man. An adult man, specifically Gendo Ikari, as Rei just straight up tells Dr. Doctor upon being scolded for rudeness. Dr. Doctor's poor judgment of character means she is semi-shocked and hurt by this and sent into a weird fugue state where she chokes Rei until a small arm goes limp. Dr. Doctor thinks about how both she and Rei are both equally replaceable to Gendo, who is still hung up on Yui as much as he seems able to have an emotional attachment to anyone, and so finds all other women to be interchangeable tools.How replaceable Rei is could be a reference to whatever Rei's unnatural origins are, but we've also seen that Gendo considers children to be a renewable and easily disposable resource.

Then Dr. Doctor kills herself (or is murdered, who can say) and gets ... replaced by her daughter in the project.

SO I GUESS THIS IS ALL PART OF NUMBER 2'S TESTIMONY TO THE OBELISKS or maybe not but his thing is done or on break and fuckin' Kaji is there to ... break him out? Even though he's the reason Number 2 was getting interrogated? I don't know, I don't know.

They only use one set of handcuffs for Number 2, but they had three on Shinji in the previous episode.

Misato also had some thing with security intelligence interrogation going on in this episode maybe but they're done and give her back her gun.

Then Kaji's hanging out in a Silent Hill otherworld before a giant fan in weird sickly light and the screen goes black with a gunshot and I don't believe he's dead because I've been fooled about fuckin' Kaji before.

... but then Misato comes home, looking utterly exhausted and devastated, and she sees the message light blinking on her answering machine and she presses play as tears fill her eyes and she collapses to her knees listening to a message from Kaji. He apologizes for causing her trouble yet again, asks her to apologize to Ritsuko as well, asks her to get Shinji to show her where his garden is so she can water the flowers for him, and promises to tell her what he was too scared to tell her years ago. Misato's crying becomes heartwrenching raw sobs (Kotono Mitsuishi does a great job here, breaking my heart) and Shinji, curled up in his room, takes out his headphones and peeks into the kitchen to take in this vision of distraught, helpless adult grief. Then he goes back to his room without alerting Misato to his presence and pulls his pillow over his head, trying to drown out Misato's sobs, because he's just a kid and he knows there's nothing he can do and so he doesn't know what he /should/ do.

Although I've been wanting it for episodes, Kaji's death becomes a bitter pill that I can feel no mean satisfaction from. I'm not sure what's going on, but I know Misato's distraught. This concludes my report on Episode 21 of Neon Genesis Evangelion.

[stormtrprinstilettos]

Wake Up - Roger x fem Reader (smut)

Summary: It’s 1983 and Queen is recording their next album at the studio where you work, and things get a little heated between you and the drummer.

Word Count: ~4.3K

Warnings: smut, somewhat of an age gap (21 vs. 35), oral smut, language, phone sex smut, and some kind of sappy shit. 18+ please and thank you

[A/N: Using the same Roger x Reader concept as I did here, so I guess this is a series now, but I want to write them to be able to be read as one shots as well. This isn’t the one that was supposed to be next, but I had these two other requests sent in, and I’m doing these before that one because the story flows better if you want to read them as a series. Thank you @quirkydeaky & she who doesn’t want to be named ( 🐓) for the suggestions. (Pretend Reader & Roger have discussed what happens before and that it is completely consensual!) Potential sugar daddyesque thing (I don’t know how to describe it) developing, and smut, in case you missed that.]

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

It was already a long, exhausting day and it wasn’t even noon. You had to leave home at 5am to pick a friend up at the airport. After bringing them home you had to run to the bank. You didn’t get to work until after 10 and you were going to have to leave around 3:00 to get to a doctor’s appointment. You probably should have just taken the day off, but if you would have, you’d not have gotten your daily Roger fix. The two of you got together alone a few times since that night a couple of weeks ago, not counting that time two days ago when he stayed behind at the studio when everyone else went to get lunch (he decided he wanted to have you instead). Of course you’d have liked it every night, as would he, but you understood that it couldn’t happen like that, so the two of you settled for at least being able to flirt with each other as often as possible.

Roger notices you gathering your things and ran out to catch you before you leave. “Where do you think you’re going?” he yelled as he flings the door open, surprising you, making you jump and scream.

“Stop doing that!” you yell, both of you laughing. He finds it amusing how jumpy you get when he sneaks up on you, so he never lets the chance to startle you pass him by. “I have a doctor’s appointment.”

His face turned concerned. “Are you okay?” He walks over and puts a hand on your shoulder.

“I’m fine,” you giggle. “It’s just a check up with the lady doctor.” His face falls, even more concerned than before. “I’m not pregnant, Roger,” you laugh. “It’s just my yearly visit and I need to renew my birth control prescription.” He exhales the breath he was holding in and starts to chuckle. “Not like I would know if you knocked me up this soon anyway,” you say seriously, but jokingly just to toy with him, after turning your back and walking away. “Guess I’ll find out in a little while, huh?” you turn around and tell him with a big toothy grin, starting to laugh again. “Scare me and I’ll scare you back.” He realizes you’re joking and flips you off, which you kindly reciprocate. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Roger.”

“Not if I see you before then,” he chortles as you walk out the door.

Before going home after the trip to the doctor’s, you stopped over at the grocery store to buy something that would be easy to make for dinner. You argued with some creep on the bus ride home who didn’t understand the concept of personal boundaries. You were tired since you had to get up so early this morning. Your boss was in a bad mood earlier and kept nitpicking at every little thing. So when you finally get inside your apartment, you’re loving the fact that you don’t have to talk to or see anyone else until tomorrow. After getting the food cooking, you run back to your room to change into comfortable clothes, throwing on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt, pulling your hair up into a ponytail and stop off at your stereo to get some music on before going back to the kitchen.

You set your plate of food on the table, and right as you’re sitting down to eat, there’s a knock on the door. “Dammit,” you whisper to yourself as you roll your eyes, and walk to the door. You look through the peephole and don’t see anyone, so you slowly open the door.

“Surprise!” Roger hollers as he jumps in front of the door, laughing hysterically after you scream and slap him on his arm for scaring you. “Missed you this afternoon,” he says as he leans against the doorframe and peaks out over his sunglasses. Those damn sunglasses, you groan to yourself. “Wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

You lean against the door and smile. “You’re ridiculous. It’s only been a few hours,” you tell him as you open the door and motion for him to come in. “I’m just about to eat dinner. Spaghetti. Want some?”

“You cook?” he asks with an amused tone to his voice. “Impressive.” You glare at him and stick out your tongue as you make a plate for him. He sits down at the table after grabbing a drink from the refrigerator, waiting for his food. “Van Morrison,” he nods, taking note of the music you have playing in the background. “You can cook and you listen to good music,” he jokes as you put his plate down in front of him before taking a seat. “And no one’s snatched you up yet?”

“Oh shut up,” you groan. “Maybe I don’t want to be snatched up,” you giggle as you take a bite of your food.

“Well somebody needs to,” he says before taking a sip of his drink. “Because it’s a shame to cook like this and not have anyone to feed it to.”

You start laughing. “It’s jarred spaghetti sauce I got from the store and I added meat to it. I’m not a 5 star chef.”

The impromptu dinner with Roger didn’t last long. You both ate rather quickly considering all of the talking you were doing. He told you about the rest of his day at the studio, how Brian was being difficult and Freddie left not long after you did because of all the bickering. You told him about your trip to the airport at that ungodly hour but spared him the details of your visit to the doctor. After cleaning the kitchen, you joined him in the living room where he was quite relaxed on the sofa, flipping through the tv channels with his arm thrown on the back of the sofa.

“I’m so tired,” you whine, plopping down next to him on the sofa and taking it upon yourself to curl up next to him, resting your head on his shoulder. “It’s been such a long day.”

“Get some rest,” he tells you as he pats you softly on top of your head. You’re expecting him to get up and leave, but he doesn’t. He stays right there, letting you relax, even moving his arm from the back of the sofa and wrapping it around your shoulder.

You fell asleep. You’re not sure when, or even for how long you had been sleeping, and you would still be sleeping had you not heard him saying your name.

“Y/N,” you hear him mumble. You can’t make out anything else he’s mumbling, thinking that’s because you’re not fully awake, so you lift your head and look at him. You start to giggle. He’s sound asleep, and as far as you can tell, he’s enjoying whatever it is he’s dreaming about. He has a soft smile on his lips, and he keeps letting out these cute, quiet groans.

When you start to sit up, you realize that your hand is resting on his waist. You look down to make sure you don’t push on him when you sit up and notice a significant bulge in his pants. Biting your lip, you look over at him again, his smile still there, and his groaning getting just a little bit louder. You scoot down, carefully to make sure you don’t disturb him, and climb over him to get off of the sofa and kneel next to him on the floor, ideas swirling around in your head. Should I? you ask yourself. You don’t even try to convince yourself not to. Smirking devilishly, you slowly start to unbutton his pants, looking back up to Roger as you softly unzip them, hoping he doesn’t wake up. Not yet, anyway. That’s why you don’t even try to pull his pants down to give you better access.

Carefully, you open the waist of his jeans and rub against the front of his boxers, watching for any reaction on his face. His smile goes away, but he’s still groaning and whispers your name sporadically. You feel his cock growing harder and harder with every move the palm of your hand makes down the shaft. You want him to wake up now. You want him to wake up with his dick already hard and you want him to ravish the hell out of you. But he still sleeps, even as you take his arousal out of his boxers, even as you rub the drop of precum around the tip with your thumb as you gently tapped his shaft with your other four fingers. “You make me so hard,” he whispers. You look up to him and he’s still sleeping. Sure, you could easily wake him up, but this was more fun.

You climb back on the sofa, position yourself between his legs and lower your mouth to the head of his dick, licking around the head at first before taking it all in your mouth, moving up and down, hoping he would wake up soon. “Fuck,” you hear him moan, making you take him out of your mouth and gaze up at him. How the hell is he still sleeping? you wonder, lowering your mouth back down and working harder to get him to wake up. He starts breathing heavier and moaning louder and his hips start to move. You know from previous experience that he’s close – real close – and you wish he would wake the hell up so he would know that this wasn’t all a dream. “Naughty girl,” you hear him groan as he grabs the hair on top of your hair and tugs it so you’ll look at him. He’s not sleeping anymore. You smirk at him as you slowly lift your head to look up at him. He smirks back and reaches down and starts to push off your shorts. “Take those off and turn around,” he says with a wink.

He moves his body to lay flat on his back, smiles and motions for you to take your place on top of him. He gently lowers you to his mouth, anchoring his mouth to your warm flower and began to flick his tongue up and down the slit. You were frantically trying to push his pants down from his waist, but the sensation he was creating as he was lapping at your box was making it hard for you to do anything. He used two fingers to open you up, plunging his tongue in as far as he could. You fell down quickly, taking his dick in your mouth again, your moans vibrating against his already pulsating member, making it hard for him to hold off. “Stop,” he desperately tells you. “I want to wait for you.”

You pull your mouth away and lay your head on his thigh, too weak to move in any other position, and you hold his rock in your hand. “You make me feel so good, Roger,” you groan, kissing his thighs close to his erection. His tongue moves to flick over your clit as his fingers move inside you, rapidly moving in and out. “Keep doing that,” you command him. “Don’t stop.” He’s enjoying this, and he could do it all night, but he’s about to explode, and he wants you to explode with him. You can hear the sounds of his tongue moving against your wet flower. You’re getting close, too, so you lift your head and take him back in your mouth, sucking on him hard and pulsing up and down quickly, his moaning against your core making it easy for you to release every ounce of pressure you have been holding in for the exact moment he is ready to burst with you.

He came first, his load shooting down your throat, and feeling the tremor his deep moan made against you helped you cum immediately after. After catching your breath, you climb off him and stand up. He scoots up a bit and pulls you back down next to him. “That was a nice way to wake up,” he says with a smile as he gently runs his fingers up and down your arm. “What time is it anyway?” He looks around to find a clock.

“Almost 11,” you sigh after realizing how late it was. You’re usually in bed at this time since you have to wake up early to get to work on time. You start to sit up but he pulls you back down again. “It’s late…”

“I don’t care,” he chuckles.

“You just want to stay like this the rest of the night?” you laughed. “Can I at least put my shorts back on? I’m cold.” You lean over to grab them off the floor but Roger pulls you back again.

“No,” he fusses. “Easier access this way,” he says with a laugh as he holds you tight, but you manage to wiggle yourself free and put your shorts on. “Are you kicking me out?” he asks, amused at this sudden spurt of awkwardness that seems to have taken over you.

“You are more than welcome to stay,” you tell him with your hands on your hips. “I have to go to bed or I’ll never make it to work on time. It takes 37 minutes to get there, and I have to wake up at 6 or I’ll miss the bus…” He’s laughing at your rambling and you’re getting frustrated. “What?”

He pulls you back down to the sofa. “It took me 15 minutes to get here from there.” He can see in your face that you don’t understand why he’s telling you this. “I can drive you there in the morning.”

“That doesn’t make sense,” you say. “Why come all the way over here to…” You raise an eyebrow, wondering if he’s trying to say what you think he’s trying to say.

“Am I welcome to stay or not?” he asks. “Because if I am, I would like to go to bed.” You wanted him to stay. You always wanted him to stay but he never did. And you knew if he did stay, that wouldn’t be good for this “no emotional attachment” rule you were doing very good at not breaking. This was just sex, that’s it. Good sex – okay, exceptional sex – and fun. Nothing more. That whole falling asleep together and waking up next to each other thing? Well, that was a door you didn’t know if you wanted to open.

“Stay,” you whispered with a grin. You immediately regretted it, but it was too late now. “Let’s go to bed.”

The two of you laid in bed, not touching each other, not knowing if you should be talking – not sure of anything anymore. “Roger?” you call to get his attention.

He rolls over on his side you look at you. “If I didn’t like you, I wouldn’t be here. If I didn’t enjoy your company, I wouldn’t be here. And I would never tell you all of this if I had any intention of never speaking to you again after we’re done recording.”

He answered every single question you wanted to ask him but would never dare. You didn’t want this to get serious right now (or ever), and you definitely didn’t want him thinking he could read your mind, so you had to think fast. “That’s nice,” you tell him rather dryly, being completely sarcastic. “How do I know you’re not just saying that?”

He started to do his playful growl and climbed over you to hover, tickling you and nibbling on your neck, making you laugh hysterically. “Just because you’ll say anything as long as the dick is big enough doesn’t mean I’m like that,” he mocked, referencing what you told Alan that night at the bar.

“I bet,” you laughed. “You probably tell all the girls that.”

He pins your hands above your head and gives you a sneaky grin. “Probably,” he says before bending down to give you a quick peck on the lips. “But you’re not those other girls.”

You grunt and roll your eyes, still laughing. “I’m sure you tell them that too,” you giggle. “You’re supposed to just be here for the sex and I’m supposed to be the emotional one.”

“If this was just about sex, I wouldn’t still be here,” he tells you. “I’d have been back at my place by now.” You stop laughing and look at him somewhat concerned, which makes him start to chuckle. “Am I making you nervous again?”

“Yes, you’re making me fucking nervous,” you grunt, pulling your hands free from his grip and pushing him off of you as you sit up. He lays back down, hands behind his head on the pillow and looks up at you with a grin. “This isn’t supposed to be anything more than…”

“I didn’t agree to that,” he bluntly stated, but with the grin still on his face. “You’re the one who insisted on that. I’m just going along with it.”

You throw yourself back down onto the bed, laying your head on your pillow, turned on your side, facing him, who is still grinning at you. “You’ve got to be joking right now,” you laughed. “Like I’m going to allow myself to get serious about you.” You can tell those words stung him a little bit and you felt terrible. It wasn’t your intention. “What I mean is, you’ll be done with your recording and then you’ll go back to London, and I’ll be here, and…”

“And what?” he asked. “That’s it? You’ll be done?” He had to be amused by the whole situation. He was always the one being the brutally honest one, the one taking what he wanted, and then moving on when he was done.

“You’ll be done,” you tell him, poking him in the chest. “I’ll still be here, living my mundane life, and you’ll be out there living yours.” You climb on top of him, his arms still behind his head, your hands resting on either side of him. “And if you say it’s not going to be like that, you’re lying.”

“Okay,” he chuffs as he pushes you off of him and grabs you, pulling you close to him. “Then I won’t say it.”

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

The next morning he shuffles into the kitchen, looking completely spent but wearing a huge smile. “Good morning,” you chuckle. “Sleep well?”

“Mmm hmm,” he mumbled as he walked behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist. “You still smell like strawberries,” he chuckled. “I’d kiss you but I don’t have a toothbrush,” he said as he gave you a peck on the top of your head.

“I have a new one in the bathroom closet,” you tell him as you wave your hand back. “Toothpaste is in the medicine cabinet above the sink.” He lets go of you and starts to walk to the bathroom. “Hey, Roger?” you call him, and he turns around. You don’t know why you called him because you don’t even know what you want to say. Instead, you just smile, and he smiles in return before disappearing down the hall.

The two of you walked into the studio together. Jack was already there with Brian and they didn’t notice you come in, so you decided to take advantage of the last few seconds of privacy and pulled him down for a kiss. “Let me take you somewhere tonight,” he said, completely throwing you off guard. “Dinner. A movie. Something.”

Before you could answer, your boss, Kevin - the studio owner, walks in. “Oh good, you’re here,” he hollers, completely ignoring the fact that Roger was standing right there. “I need you down in San Diego. The idiots down there don’t know their asses from a hole in the ground.” He walked in his office and you looked at Roger, who was just as lost as you were. “Just for a couple of days. Shouldn’t be longer than that.”

“But, I don’t…”

“I know but you have to,” he tells you with his booming voice. “Here,” he says as he hands you a wad of cash. “For gas, food and a room.” He tosses you a car key. “Take the car. Don’t mess her up.” All you can do is stand there. “Here’s the address,” he hands you a slip of paper he just scribbled on. “Go home and get your things. It’s a 3 hour drive.” He walks in his office and slams the door.

You turn back to Roger, looking defeated. “Raincheck?” you ask.

“Of course,” he softly says with an equally soft smile. He takes the paper out of your hand and writes down his phone number. “Call me tonight so I know you’re safe.” He winks and kisses you one more time before walking back into the studio.

You finally get back to the dingy, cheap hotel room you rented for the night. You could have splurged for a nicer place, but this one is right across the street from where you need to be in the morning. You’re only here for a couple of nights anyway. It’s almost midnight – you lost track of time when you were at the bar next door having a good time with some of the locals. There was one in particular who caught your eye, and you really wanted to invite them back to your room, but you didn’t. You had a phone call to make anyway.

“This better be you, Y/N,” Roger answered, his voice raspy, sounding a mixture of sleepy and worry. “I’ve been worried fucking sick.”

“It’s me, Roger. I’m sorry. I didn’t realize what time it is.”

“Really?” He wasn’t happy. He was upset. Not angry, just… annoyed. “What were you doing? No one, I hope.”

You start to giggle. He’s upset, and you know he is, but you find his tone a bit endearing, and cute. “I was having some drinks. That’s all. I’m sorry,” you tell him, right before it dawned on you what he had just said. “And no, I wasn’t doing anyone, asshole.”

“Better not,” he chuckled deeply. “What are you doing now?”

“Nothing,” you say as your tone turns more relaxed, quieter. “Just got into bed.”

“All alone,” he said, his tone lowering, too. “Shame.” Just hearing his voice was soothing you. You didn’t realize how high strung you were today until he started talking in that soft, raspy voice. “Are you thinking about me?” he asks.

You giggle, with just a hint of embarrassment, because you absolutely were. “Yeah,” you whisper. “I am.”

“Thinking about my lips grazing yours, moving them down to your neck,” he whispers back. “My fingers running down your body…” He hears you. He hears your breathing get heavier and he smiles to himself. “I’m thinking about it too.”

“Oh yeah?” you ask once you clear your throat of that pocket of air that seemed to build up. You don’t know what else to say. He’s got you flustered.

“Close your eyes,” he whispers. “Spread your legs and touch yourself for me. Imagine those are my fingers running over your skin, down to that pretty little clit of yours.”

“You’re such a tease,” you breathlessly whisper, doing everything with your fingers he’s describing to you right now.

He chuckles. “If I was there I would be teasing you. Kissing every inch of you,” he stops and takes a deep breath. “Running my tongue all over you, tasting every single bit of you. Teasing your clit then sliding my fingers inside you.”

His breathing is starting to match yours. “Tell me what you’re doing right now,” you murmur. “Are you…”

He doesn’t give you the chance to finish asking. “Imaging your mouth wrapped around my cock.”

“My tongue licking around the tip, letting you feel the warmth of my mouth,” you whisper. “You like when I go slow, don’t you.”

“I’m so fucking hard right now, Y/N,” he gasps. “Wish I could be buried deep inside of you.”

You start biting your bottom lip, remembering exactly how he feels when he’s inside you. “I wish you were here right now so I could feel you…”

“So I could see your face when you cum for me,” he whispers. “I love watching you cum.”

“I love feeling you cum inside me,” you tell him, both of your breathing getting heavier and deeper.

He can barely talk anymore. “I think I’m going to cum just thinking about it,” he groans. You start moving your fingers faster and start to moan. “Fuck, babe. I love hearing you moan like that.”

“You gonna cum for me, Roger?” you ask. “Because I’m about to…” You couldn’t even finish your statement. Both of you climaxed at the same time, hearing each other in your ear through the phone receiver and you both start to giggle.

“I made a mess,” he laughed. “Wow.”

“Yeah,” you laugh. “Wow, indeed.”

“Still my naughty little minx,” he chuckles. “What are you doing to me?”

“Same thing you’re doing to me,” you tell him, your tone almost serious. The two of you sit there, quiet, listening to each other breathing over the phone. You close your eyes and lean your head back against the headboard.

“Get some sleep,” he tells you, breaking the silence. “Call me tomorrow.”

You can hear him smiling on the other end, and it brings a smile to your face. “I will,” you whisper. “I’ll make sure it’s not so late,” you giggle.

“Goodnight, Y/N,” he says before hanging up the phone.

[part 3 >>]

[kny111]

I know I haven’t really updated on here. Fatherhood can be really tiring and time consuming as it is a blessing and will change who you are for the better, at least for me. I’ve been away from a lot of the subjects I used to normally post about until recently, that’s because I picked up the energy and interest for science journalism again. To say I went off to have a long waited talk with nature is to minimize greatly the kind of transformations I’ve undergone. The mysteries she’s shown me far greater than any cosmic unknown that I could have ever imagined of. I know a lot of the folks who used to follow this blog might be surprised to know that within that journey I’ve seen, experienced and have been in communion with some really influential spirits of old. Nature’s hidden variables. Whatever you want to call it. Something occurred when I decided to take more seriously the religions and spirituality of my ancestors. Something that only reinvigorated my love for science and the unknown, physics, art, and expression of these things for beneficial communal use. I’m from Quisqueya, the first testing grounds for colonialism and subsequently the evolution of neo-colonialism. Not too long after and we become one of the first pit stop for the trans-Atlantic slave trading markets to proliferate and spin the rest of the world off into the white supremacist capitalist patriarchy hell branch of a reality we know of today. Our little island has undergone so many transformations and inclusion of peoples, cultures, so many I only recently found out of like how Haitians took in Jewish refugees during the time of Hitler’s nazism. Because I still deal with mental health issues and depression being one I’ve had since childhood, I sometimes don’t have near enough energy to convey how have things been going since my last big update here. My spiritual and religious journey, finding comfort in myself and closure in ways I no longer adhere to. That said I found it beyond amazing how earlier today on October the 14th ‘Indigenous Peoples Day‘ I was drumming away to Tainx music without realizing what day today was without looking at my social media feeds yet. Here I was normally thinking I’m so tired, down and out of trying to keep these cultures alive and I was already doing so instinctively in the truest way I know how.

Like I mentioned, I decided to take more seriously my Afro-Indigenous roots and what it meant to be a Black Dominican Haitian Taino American. It took me on the wildest ride with the unlikeliest subject ranging from seeing quantum entanglement examples right before my eyes, seeing living breathing afrofuturism through my Vodun, Catholic, Christian roots and the functionality of Vodun to incorporate so many ancient parts of being Black into what intuitively led me down a road of self and outward knowledge on the cosmos around me. To then blend these epigenetically installed formulas of spirituality embededd in me by history and nature, incorporate them into my expression of art and self which is one has been like achieving a life long dream I didn’t even know I had. I did so much intuitive shit that was so clearly linked to my identity as an Afro-Indigenx American immigrant along the way that I had erected an altar without knowing it was an altar. I would section and compartmentalize this prototype altar so beautifully and had no clue I was paying respects to my ancestors and spirits of the world until more recently a few months back. When I realized this, it was like a Cambrian explosion occurred in me. I don’t want to get into the details of the abilities it brought out that I already had in me due to prying eyes (ahem surveillance capitalist patriarchy is still outchea at large) but to simply meditate and think on my folks has given me such a renewed and strengthened sense of intuition and appreciation for the past and future that I never knew existed. Sometimes I’ll legit write and prophesize shit out the ass like it’s a normal day it’s wild, shit I never believed in but the science seems to check out with quantum physics and what not. That’d be an explanation for another time. The altar has now evolved to a place I can really go to and express but at the same time it’s something I’ve learned to keep within my own self so that it’s not the altar that’s important, rather the changes I’ve gone through to get to such a place. I write, dream, visualize, laugh, act, improvise, predict based on science, meditate, heal, rehabilitate myself there. But conversely the world speaks to me there, the spirits of old, new, those to be. I know it sounds type wild but it’s gotten normal for me to experience something my old science nerd ass self woulda made fun of me for. But when you get into a connection with ya ancestors like I have and reach the conclusions and deductions I have on the systems that control the planet it gets clearer to see that the Indigenous were right all along on colonialism, it’s gotto go. There’s no place for it in the future if we’re to survive a planet seemingly becoming another Venus. I’d like to think we not gone be fighting each other while some catastrophe bop our asses one time like they did the dinos. That’s one of the main messages they keep tellin me and it’s hard to refute. I’ll try and continue this update on another day as there’s so much in between and concepts and ideas I wanna share about how to move forward on activism and using art to get our ideas about those movements across. The above images span from months, just small droplets of the cool ass journey I been on just trying to maintain some normalcy while playing my part in not helping oppressors of any kind continue proliferating their systems of domination and subjugation. So this first image is from the week not too long ago when I had 2 honey bees flying in and checking out the altar. Then I left an old jar of honey that still had some and they’d return and eat some for like a good week or so. At one point, this matrix-like moment happens when one of them goes into the jar and makes this cool sound I never heard before. The bee had gone in there before many times and never made that specific sound, it was like a lower frequency conch shell or something. When I checked the time it was like 1:23pm or 1:11pm one of those. I was like..... get Neo!! shit was so cool. This next image is really a culmination of my search to learn more about my Afro-Indigenousness which led me to learn more about my Haitianness and the spirituality and religion. From painting Papa Legba paintings before I even knew him, to giving respects to all types of 21 division spirits and Vodun loa before ever even knowing of them. It was as if each part of these religions was trying to show me how much of them was in me in how intuitively I’d gravitate towards these religions despite being still very devoted to science and scientific literacy worldwide. Idk it’s just been a really cool blending of a lot of things I never thought could come together. I found this moth around the time I was reading and thinking deeply on the creator entity in Vodun and some African religions, Gran Maitrex. I’ve always had an interest in creator stories and beings so  when this Golden Moth popped up in the altar (right on the mat I have laid in front of it, facing it, as if it came there to spend its last moments) I was like a little kid. To me it reminds me of those mysteries we’ve yet to discover that can help us in our path to heal ourselves and others if we chose to. The following two are from my walking meditating sessions by the river. They have slightly deeper stories to em about relaxation, overcoming obstacles, predictions I made that day about the sky that I wont get into on here cause it’s exhausting lol. The next image with the wooden branch I brought in from a forest walk is of one of the bees I spoke of flying around the Afro-Indigenx/ Ancient Egypt/ West Africa section of the altar. It did this several times enough for me to note that it liked that particular area. Following non repeating image is of the portrait I did a while back for the Heath Gallery in Harlem on Rein-visioning Brown and Black Bodies in Scifi: Story of 4 Tainx sisters calling for their descendants to help them from the demonic wrath of colonialism. This picture I took when I finally got to take my ass out to jog after a whole day of being a dad. I found a neat tree to try and climb at night and found this beautiful bright green grasshopper right by the branch I picked. Grasshoppers always remind me of giant leaps I could be taking forward. The following image I took during another forest walk when I looked up and saw this cool cross shape juxstapositioned among the trees. Last image I took during the Medieval festival they hold at Fort Tryon every year. It’s where I sold my awesome Medieval chicken paintings (which have now taken place at altar where I give em much love) last year dressed as Obi Wan Kenobi. This year I decided to just enjoy it with bae and did so dressed as Jedi Jesus posing as a Dominican Fryer. More pics on that to come. Just wanted to update yall on the spiritual in case anyone could use these words to benefit em. Yall take care. - Ken

[sonipanda]

Now let’s be creating some little statements with a new brand! This company got in touch and wanted me to test out their products. At first, I thought they were a little different to what I was used to (mainly because they’re a thicker denier with different designs) but I really had to give them a go.

I have to say their whole brand is pretty quirky – and it’s something that is right up my street as long as I can style them right!

Oh and this is also Blog 1 of 2 – I have another one coming up for you all tomorrow 🙂

  About 77Denari

77DENARI is an Italian line of tights & socks of Italian manufacture produced in limited edition.

The line has an experimental and at the same time ancient character: the tights, of an elastic nature, are in fact printed according to the original artisan method and with water colors, a technique in use for “still” supports of natural origin.

Every single graphic element has changed to a frame, thus becoming an absolutely prized piece, a unique piece, and the ethical-aesthetic choice of using water colors alone makes the product complex and innovative; therefore the study of colors, designs and print media are the result of a combination of ingenuity and magic, feasibility and disruption of the rules.

77denari was born in 2012 and is composed of 8 tights / stories per collection; starting from 2018, 77news grows and launches the Socks collection, and the “STRIPPANTI” Other Line.

The entire creative and printing process is carried out by the two founders of 77denari, Simona Berardi and Carla Armillei, and is inspired by the crude vision of geometric elements typical of the instinct of Nature.

77denari also boasts the collaboration of various artists working in the field of graphic design and illustration, photography, music, video and styling. Each of them supports the project becoming an integral part of the creative process; their participation opens the circle of possibilities towards still unexplored and seductive alchemies, and they contribute to creating, for the 77DENARI project, an imprint that is renewed over time.

The idea on which the project is based is the desire to give “beauty” an extra value, in which harmony and proportions of the parts go beyond the absolute, of time and memory, and focus on the “Physical soul” of intrigued consciences. In this case in fact the work is worn and moves: it walks, runs, dances and lives stories, reinterpreting the proposed contents with its own voice, and in the meantime creating a new identity.

Tights – talisman therefore, capable of breaking the classical scheme of gender and form and of ruffling with wonder.

A special thanks goes to the “DUEC Calzificio” and to our consultant Renato Altimani.

– taken from their website

The Spec

Colour: Cream

Style: #55

Size: One Size

Denier: 60

Materials: 85% polyamide, 15% elastane

Price: N/A

Website: 77Denari – A/W 18-19 #55

My Outfit

Instead of creating something loud, I thought I would incorporate the tights into my outfit. I wore my cream bodysuit paired with my teal skirt and added my mustard boots to finish off the look. You could easily pair any other colour footwear with them to create a colour block, but I wanted to fuse it altogether to create a piece 🙂

My Deets

Bodysuit: Pull & Bear

Skirt: H&M

Tights: 77Denari

Boots: New Look

    The Review

From The Website: 77denari, for autumn-winter 18/19, explores the vast world of feelings, and the multiple points of view they can generate. Thanks to the senses, the body in fact receives information from the interior and exterior environment. They are accessing the world itself within us. Each of them has the ability to form a perceptual opinion before the action of intelligence.

We have been taught that there are five senses: sight, hearing, taste, smell and touch, and that is anatomically, but also admits that we have a thermal sensitivity, and we know how to recognize the sense of well being, pain, or discomfort of the organism as a whole.

For this reason 77denarians have explored various currents, which have identified from 9 to 21. We have embraced 12 of them; precisely 7 more than the 5, through which we think we can fully experience our perception, and then transform us into what surrounds us, to try to increase that degree of cooperation, according to which individuals build together a reality and a shared truth.

– 100% made in Italy: the basic pantyhoses and socks are made by Italian manufacturer DUEC Calzificio located in Goffredo Castiglione;

– 100% handmade screen printing: no use of printer;

– composition: 85% polyamide and 15% elastane;

– one size fits all: the basic product is extremely elastic for sizes S-M-L;

– drawings only with water colors;

– limited edition: max 100 pieces for model;

– high resistance and durability of the design: hand washing at 30 degrees is recommended.

  The Packaging: now I have to say how impressed I was with their packaging. They were sent in a super padded envelope, in 2 small boxes.

Very simple, but they are certainly different and I love it. Even though there isn’t much detail to them in terms of model, sizing, blurb about the hosiery etc, they still aren’t bad at all.

  Getting Them On: now as the pattern is symmetrical on each leg, I took my time doing the scrunch and roll up the legs making sure I pair it as evenly as I can so I don’t have to do it again later.

These were fine rolling up the legs, and going over anklets. I had no issues at all – if anything they were super soft and so easily to glide right up.

  On The Legs:

well all I can say is how funky are these?!?!?!

The quality of these are really good I have to say. They are such a gorgeous fit on the legs; even if they are a one size pair! They have so much stretch to them and really do hug the legs well. I expected them to be slightly loose, but in actual fact that is not the case!

They look like they are a block cream colour, but if you stretch them (like how they stretch on my thighs) they do go slightly lighter. You still do get really good leg coverage overall, but it’s something to note if you want a true opaque block colour.

The design is super awesome; I have done something similar a while ago with a Jonathan Aston pair (called Dynamic) which was black sheer with a black design and they really rocked. I love how they have worked the black and goldy-yellow colour at the side of the legs, which gives you the opportunity to actually pair up colours easily with it. As I mentioned, I kept with my mustard boots, but I could have easily done purple or blue (with a different skirt too) and it would just enhance the colour and design even more.

The only downside I had was that the print was a little off on the left leg; it’s like it got stuck and slightly peeled off a little. It’s nothing major but if I’m going into the nitty gritty details, that is something I picked up on when I got them out the packaging.

The fit of these are great; as I said for a one size pair, these are fab. I do feel it could fit up to a large size but you would be looking at a sheerer cream colour than a block opaque.

The feel of them are super soft and so nice on the legs. They’re smooth (both inside and out), they’re soft to touch and they really do caress the legs.

  The Toes & Ankle: are also great. I expected some chunky seams around the toes creating little bumps around the ends but nothing of the sort. They fit and shape to the toes really nicely so you get a smooth looking finish. This also carries around the foot and up the ankles too.

You will find these will wrinkle slightly around the ankle due to the higher denier, but nothing too major.

I do think these are reinforced – and I will say that as the denier is quite thick so it would be pretty hard to create holes in these!

  The Waistband: is so soft and so comfortable I don’t wanna take these off! I love the way they sat on the waist and actually just moved with me. They don’t fall down or move out of place once you set them, and they certainly don’t lose elasticity quickly either no matter how many times you pull them down and back up again.

It’s a proper comfort band, and I really like it!

    My Thoughts?

I gotta say I really loved being in these. They were such an experience. I know most higher denier can be a hit or miss, but these are a pair which I would class as a luxe pair. I say this purely because of the way they are made, how they feel on the legs and the quality is just lovely. Trust me when I say when you roll these on, you instantly tell what they’re gonna be like for the next 10+ hours!

I am so looking forward to my 2nd pair I get to try out!

77Denari A/W 18-19 Cream Printed Tights Now let's be creating some little statements with a new brand! This company got in touch and wanted me to test out their products.

[lariosrbacreejw68insurance-blog]

URGENT Life insurance MONEY question?

URGENT Life insurance MONEY question?

I am 18 and in a year my boyfriend and I plan to move to brooklyn. My father passed away when I was 12. I have 4 Guadians and they control the money I received from his life insurance. They set up that I don t recieve the money until I m 21. If I can prove I have an apartment and job can I recieve the money when I m 19 ?

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :cheapinsurancequotes1.info

SOURCES:

I am 18 and in a year my boyfriend and I plan to move to brooklyn. My father passed away when I was 12. I have 4 Guadians and they control the money I received from his life insurance. They set up that I don t recieve the money until I m 21. If I can prove I have an apartment and job can I recieve the money when I m 19 ?

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I am 18 and in a year my boyfriend and I plan to move to brooklyn. My father passed away when I was 12. I have 4 Guadians and they control the money I received from his life insurance. They set up that I don t recieve the money until I m 21. If I can prove I have an apartment and job can I recieve the money when I m 19 ?

[kootenaygoon]

So,

At first, I was nervous about tackling news stories. 

I knew the stakes from my summers at the Whitehorse Star, had seen how small fuck-ups could have large consequences. Telling someone else’s story is a huge privilege, a power you have over them, and it can be intoxicating. But if you do it wrong, you will hear about it. I preferred the lighter elements of the job, like taking pictures at the Pride Parade or typing up an exhaustive feature on the Capitol Theatre’s production of Chicago. I was a hype machine, excitedly Photoshopping my images and then sprawling back in my desk chair with the newly printed paper’s pages flung open to reveal my handiwork. I floated through the summer of 2014 high on the experience of it all, letting myself fall in love with each new artist I interviewed.

Some people believed the proliferation of artists in the Nelson area was thanks to the town being situated on a bed of magical quartz, but I figured it was more a case of kindreds being attracted to one another. People were looking for a life less ordinary, far from the city. Most locals had some sort of regular job and then spent the remainder of their time investing in creative endeavours, whether that meant painting a mural, starting a food truck or playing in an 80s cover band called Val Kilmer and the New Coke. I started learning the names of local authors, meeting up with poet Tom Wayman and short story writer Myler Wilkenson. I wrote a feature about a photographer named Ryan Oakley who had crowd-funded a book called Humans of Nelson, based on the viral hit Humans of New York. It featured daily portraits of people he met during his lunch breaks, along with a pithy quote that captured their essence. One young singer named Anilah had just landed her Enya-esque tracks on some TV show, a spoken word poet named Magpie Ulysses was releasing a chapbook and a popular saxophonist named Clinton Swanson was playing relentless gigs around town. I giddily funnelled their stories on to Facebook and Twitter, where I obsessively watched the engagement numbers climb. Within a month or two our web presence had exploded, and pretty soon Calvin was bragging that we had the best social media numbers in the Kootenays.

But every now and then, things got dark. The first heavy story that landed on my desk involved a quartet of teenagers who had gone missing the day before I arrived in town. It was eventually discovered that they’d commandeered a canoe and gone adventuring right into a windstorm on Slocan Lake—a body of water so enormous it almost looks like the ocean in places. Authorities were able to recover the canoe pretty quickly, and found a young girl near death. Though they rushed her to medical services, she died in the hospital. There was no trace of the others, three dudes ranging in age from late teens to early twenties. The grief was heavy in the community, and right away I felt it settle in my chest — a clenched fist of empathy. I interviewed the RCMP as they conducted a large-scale search, checking in each day to hear if there was anything to report. At one point it looked like they were going to call it off, but then the families hired a husband-wife duo from the U.S. who had a submersible specially designed for these sorts of retrievals. Within a few days they’d located the boys, down in the darkness, and dragged them back up into the light. I shuddered when I thought of how they must’ve looked after that long underwater, after being cradled to the surface with a claw. The people I interviewed talked about the closure that brought to the families, and I quoted various people silver lining it, but it was the sort of tragedy that was so random it felt cruel on a cosmic level. Like a deity reaching down from heaven to smudge out a few people with his thumb.

“We cannot presume what happened. Our best speculation is misadventure. It wasn’t a very big canoe,” RCMP officer Darryl Little told me. 

“It was more of a swift water canoe than a lake canoe. There wasn’t much space below the gunnels and we figure the wind came up and that was it.”

During those weeks I kept running into people who knew the kids, and saw the impact plain on their heartbroken faces. One woman burst into tears while I was renewing my car insurance. I decided to interview the school district psychologist, Dr. Todd Kettner, to get his insights into the community’s grief process. We met at Lakeside Park and shot a video of him sitting on a park bench, calling out the provincial government and Premier Christy Clark. They had docked his pay during the teacher’s strike, right while he was in the midst of putting in overtime to coordinate a critical incident crisis management plan for the Slocan community. He was the only psychologist for the district, which according to him was chronically under-funded. For him it wasn’t about the dollars they took off his cheque, it was the overall neglect rural schools were receiving that really set him off. In an online open letter that went viral around the province he laid out some of the routine cases he was dealing with from day to day, underlining the ways the community was failing to support students with mental health issues.

“I was awakened Sunday morning by a phone call informing me that a student at one of the 21 schools I’m responsible for was on life support in ICU after an accidental drug overdose,” he wrote.

“Monday morning, while continuing to support the staff at the school where the hospitalized student learns, a dedicated and caring school administrator and I were informed that we were needed at another school to help the staff there prepare to gently inform their students that their classmates’ parent had been killed in a tragic accident.”

Kettner was eventually reimbursed for his pay cut, but didn’t see any change at an institutional level. At the end of the day he was still doing his job the best way he could in seemingly impossible circumstances. In the newsroom Tamara filled me in on the realities of SD8, and the issues were deeply systemic. The whole system was cash-starved because the undeclared income of the cannabis industry meant that, on paper, it was the poorest district in the province. The local high school was past capacity, there were multiple elementary schools that should have been demolished years ago, and sitting through board meetings meant hearing about financial snafus of the highest order.

“Those school board meetings, Will? Worst part of my job, easy. You wouldn’t believe how boring they are. All the ‘motion to accept this’ and ‘motion to accept that’. Makes me want to blow my brains out,” she said.

“The key is, you have to get to know the trustees, the superintendent. Once you have them as a connection, they can pretty much talk you through anything.”

“You think the strike will last much longer?”

“Shit, I don’t know. Those teachers are pissed, and they’re not going to back down.”

Around this time I came to an instinctive conclusion about the type of reporter I wanted to be: not aloof, or unfeeling, but the type that engages to an almost scary degree. If I was going to write a story, I wanted to understand it on a far deeper level than I needed for the paper, I wanted to be the guy in town that was the ultimate expert on that topic — right down to its human nuances.

The story commanding my most fervid attention was the trial of Andrew Stevenson, the bank robber that Cass had told me about. Calvin, Tamara and I spent a good half an hour scouring through Facebook trying to find a photo of him and his co-accused, Krista Kalmikoff, so we could have something to illustrate Greg’s stories about the court hearings. We were unsuccessful. The guy was being charged with seven robberies over the course of about six months, of both banks and pharmacies. The NPD had identified addiction as the driving force behind the crimes, and had been able to predict the exact day of his last robbery: April 25, 2014. In my free time I interrogated anyone who knew anything about what happened, picking up scraps of information here and there. A drunk woman at a party described seeing him come careening out of the bank’s parking lot on a bike, cutting in front of city hall and hurtling down towards the lake as cops sprinted after him. I wanted, so badly, to know what this guy looked like. Calvin sent me down to the court to get a shot of him walking in handcuffed—a goon shot—but then it turned out he was appearing by video link. Foiled!

As I got to know the NPD cops, attending one of their award ceremonies, I met a soft-spoken sergeant named Nate Holt. He had thickly muscled arms, a neatly trimmed blond beard and spiky hair that was nearly white. Not only was he holding an award for bravery, he was also one of the guys who was at the bridge that day, with Andrew Stevenson's stolen money raining down from the tree like confetti. I pictured the bank robber squirming on the rocks, trying to crawl away, while they descended on him like blue wraiths. The thing about Nate was you could feel the toll his work took on him, and you could see it in the way he carried himself. He was piggy-backing a lot of sadness. One suicidal dude came at him with a butcher knife and Nate didn’t even pull his gun. No, he got close enough to tackle him in a bear-hug, wrestle the knife out of his grip and save both of their lives. Sometimes I thought about those two men, rolling on the Baker Street sidewalk in that guy’s blood, while shocked residents looked on. I couldn’t believe that someone could have an experience like that and return to work the next day. But that’s exactly what he did.

Before Paisley moved into our new place, Muppet and I got a few days of lackadaisical meandering. I took her to Kaslo May Days with me, slaloming along the highway up Kootenay Lake in a state of giddy bliss, thinking yes I think I made the right decision while I gazed out at the water. I spotted a weird gargoyle sculpture on top of a house on Front Street, and wondered to myself what the deal was there. I spent a lot of time wandering through parks with my camera, approaching strangers and asking to take their photos. Cass would later jokingly call these spreads “All the people Will met at the park the other day”. Eventually I decided I had to see this bridge Andrew Stevenson jumped off, so I got on the highway out to Castlegar and went looking for it. We turned off the highway and followed a switch-back down to the Columbia River, just a few kilometres up from a massive hydroelectric dam. I parked at one end of the bridge and walked Muppet out across the dusty concrete to the middle so we could see the spot it happened. It was a clear, sunny afternoon, and I eventually identified the small cedar he’d attempted to jump into. Below was nothing but a rocky slope to the river, twenty feet further on. This was where it all ended for him, after evading the cops six times. Maybe it was the new pot I was smoking, or maybe it was something else, but I was feeling an electric need to understand this story. I’d been struggling for years on a novel that wasn’t coming along, partially because I was finding it difficult to invent new parts of the narrative, but here was a true fucking story that I could actually throw my weight into. I stood there for a long time, while cars rocketed by in the distance and wind hurtled through the canyon. The air smelled delicious.

I stood there drinking a Slurpee while Muppet panted happily.

The Kootenay Goon

[random2908]

Seen on Twitter, https://twitter.com/alexandraerin/status/1035196520918863873?s=21

a transcript of the tweet thread (tweets quoted within are italicized including links) since I could only otherwise find difficult-to-read screenshots:

A while back, I tweeted that in case anyone isn't clear, we are well past the "first they came for" point.

This is a big story and I'm not sure it's possible for it to get enough attention.

In some cases, passport applicants with official U.S. birth certificates are being jailed in immigration detention centers and entered into deportation proceedings.” Article: http://wapo.st/2PNIf68

I'm sure the "no need to panic" brigade would want us to point out that this affecting "only" hundreds or thousands of Latinx Americans living in a narrow region along the border.

But.

First of all, that's too many people.

Because...

Because here is the thing about due process.

Everybody gets it, or no one really has it.

And from the moment the Trump regime decided it just doesn't apply to "illegal" immigrants, we were always heading here.

Some (white) people replied to suspension of due process for non-citizens by saying "Well, I could prove my citizenship easily." But how do you do that when you're not entitled to any process to prove anything?

If we passed an amendment to the Constitution saying that Constitutional protections don't apply to waterbed repair technicians named Sleven Trusbucket, all the government would have to do is say that's you and you would be out of options for proving them wrong.

And to the sort of person who is sure that life operates on formal logic and strict proof, the sort of person who is sure if they can present the right argument just the right way they can convince anyone of the truth of anything, it feels like there must be some way around that.

But that's part of the horror of a situation like this, part of why Kafka's The Trial is so viscerally uncomfortable to read. The proof does not matter if no one is bound to accept the proof. It feels like it should. It always feels like truth should matter, proof should matter.

Now I said long ago, and again at the head of this thread, that we're past the point of "first they came for". For most of the people reading this, they're still not up to "they came for me", and probably won't be for a while. They're working to expand the ranks of "non-American"

They redefined huge swathes of undocumented immigrants -- including ones working with the system to fix their status -- as "criminals" and "gangmembers" and "animals". They slammed the door in the face of immigrants with papers, finding pretexts to call them "illegal".

They started revoking the citizenship of naturalized citizens for whatever excuse they could find, and the next step is to strip citizenship of natural born citizens who don't fit their profile of a Real American.

Right now their excuse for doing so is restricting them to people born in a border region but the excuse will widen and so will the scope of the action.

And they aren't just moving in one direction here. They've been revoking the passports of trans people while all this is happening.

Now, the flipside of revoking citizenship and "deporting" someone is: the United States cannot bestow citizenship for another country. Just because the man in the low castle thinks someone looks "Mexican" doesn't mean they default to that when they lose US citizenship.

There's been a lot of talk on Twitter about the dangers of statelessness, in regard to Canada and ending birthright citizenship (something the Trumpers would love to do if they can swing it.)

People who lose their citizenship are thrown into a legal limbo, effectively becoming unpersoned for many purposes.”

Tweet/ https://twitter.com/bashirmoham…/status/1033585831544410112… “I am shocked and disturbed that the Conservative Party of Canada voted to end birth right citizenship in Canada.

I say this as someone who was born stateless - legally without a country. I'll tell you my story and why this is move is so reckless and dangerous.”

And while nationalists whip up fear of the foreign, they hate and despise the stateless even more. They're deliberately making the "immigration crisis" worse.

Nazi apologists will be happy to tell you that the great humanitarian Hitler tried so hard to get Jewish Germans settled happily and healthily elsewhere but that no one would take them in, thus leaving him with a problem in need of a final solution.

So what's going to happen when Trump has stripped citizenship from everyone who doesn't "look American", doesn't "look like they should be voting", but there's nowhere to deport all these people, no home country for them to return to?

And maybe you're thinking that we don't have the resources to actually disenfranchise and denaturalize *everybody* who doesn't "look American" buuuut the magic of not giving due process is they don't have to.

If you knew that people whose last names are in the same language as yours are getting rounded up, stripped of rights, and arrested when they go to apply for or renew a passport... how dire would it have to be, before you'd dare try?

And then what if it expands to, say, people showing up at polling places? DMVs? Hospitals?

What if it goes on to the point where "everyone knows" that people with certain names and/or skin tones aren't really citizens and don't have to be afforded any particular rights?

Before the SCOTUS struck down sodomy laws, in a lot of states being seen as gay could be used to justify just about any level of discrimination. Gay couple needs an apartment? "We can't make landlords rent to a criminal if they don't want to." Were the couple ever convicted? No.

But ~*everybody knew*~ what gay people got up into their bedrooms was illegal, doing illegal things made you a criminal, and being a criminal was grounds for termination, eviction, expulsion, exclusion.

Or if you want to see what the future of law enforcement looks like in a fascist state, look at the standards used to arrest and prosecute sex workers.

For years now, in the land of Innocent Until Proven Guilty, you could be arrested for "suspicion" of a victimless crime because of entirely legal materials in your purse and entirely legal conduct within a place you had every legal right to be.

The actual ideal is that the cops could know you're a sex worker, could know for a certain fact that you're engaged in sex work, but if they couldn't prove it then you are an innocent in the eyes of the law. That's how it's supposed to work and how it works for some crimes.

Everyone in town can know that J. Doe up on the hill beats his wife and kids but if the cops can't prove it they will tell you nothing can be done, and proof has to be more than the fear in their eyes or bruises on their arms. Or even him "allegedly" bragging about it.

Meanwhile they'll pick people up off the street for ~*suspicion*~ of sex work and "prove" it through entirely circumstantial means, none of which points to actual lawbreaking.

Now here's the crux of that: being able to claim that any woman carrying condoms (for instance) is a sex worker doesn't mean they detain everyone and make them turn out their pockets.

It just gives them a tool, a weapon, to use when they feel like it.

And that's the future of policing. Increasingly broad rules that could apply to increasingly wide swaths of the population, that can be deployed by the authorities when someone "looks" like they might be trouble, much less starts to actually make any.

They practice these techniques on populations they think they can get away with practicing them on, and when they do get away with it, they start looking to expand.

Cf. stop and frisk in New York City, where white kids were more likely to have marijuana but less likely to be stopped and ordered to turn out their pockets. It was a tool of control.

Obviously I'm talking about practices that go back years before when Trump came to power. He's part of a progression, not the source.

And if you want to know where the progression is heading, just look at how the law has treated people on the margins since the year seventeen seventy forever.

That's where we're heading.

And I don't think enough people are alarmed enough by this.

I saw somebody QTing the Washington Post story at the head of this thread with "And Democrats want to tell us to vote every two years like that's enough."

It's not enough. But we haven't been voting every two years, and that's part of how we got here. Just part. A crucial part.

I think we should add this (specifically: stripping people near the border of citizenship) to the things we call our representatives about, especially but not only if you're in Texas. And if we can vote in a Democratic majority we'll have more tractable reps to yell at about it.

Tweet/ https://twitter.com/herhandsmyh…/status/1035206932938801152… “Plus: we have to start somewhere. Voting every single time is an essential step.”

Essential. Necessary. Not sufficient, but necessary.

A scary thing in all of this: the wave of revocation of trans passports I alluded to upthread doesn't appear to have *originated* anywhere. Select federal employees just decided it's time to start doing it.

I can't tell you from the outside which escalations of "enforcement" (to abuse the term) against immigrants and what I guess are "accused immigrants" among citizens were also spontaneous decisions made at the level at which they occur but I'm sure some of them were.

What I'm saying is, there have always been people within the federal enforcement apparatus and bureaucracy who were waiting for favorable winds to launch their warships.

Tweet/ https://twitter.com/queer_i_am/status/1035207525363200001… “Anti-homeless laws are also a really good example, especially because they target actions _everyone_ does. Pull over after working a night shift to nap and avoid an accident? Illegal.

I stopped to watch a cop once and he got in my space and threatened to take me in on loitering.”

See also: anti-loitering laws. A law against existing in space. Used to run off white kids who aren't driving business, run in anyone the cops feel like making a criminal. Not enforced against anyone ~*respectable*~, who "belongs".

With so much of this enforcement being subjective and self-directed, it is also decentralized. Which makes it harder to block or even attack.

Bank involvement in forfeiture/seizure of assets. (h/t @herhandsmyhands) This should scare you.

Tweet/https://twitter.com/sacbee_news/status/1035172325463736320… “Bank of America freezing accounts of customers suspected of not being US citizens : https://www.sacbee.com/news/business/article217567300.html

I know people are waiting for a point where it feels real, where it really feels like Nazi Germany. That point is going to be too far along to have any practical chance of stopping it.

Instead it's going to keep happening piecmeal and every time it happens, those who sound the alarm will be met with "You're overreacting, this isn't like a law against Jewish business ownership, this is only affecting a specific group of people in specific circumstances."

Relax: The monster's not eating your whole body, it's just eating one bite at a time.

The piecemeal, self-directed, subjective nature of these actions makes them harder to fight. Bank of America, the State Department, and DHS are all saying the same thing when questioned on this: "This is the same policy we've always followed." It's just being applied differently.

"We've always exercised discretion..." but now it's being exercised in different directions, towards different ends.

Someone asked what to do, besides be scared:

Make a lot of noise. If we are silent, we are complicit. If the only voices heard are those who support what's happening, they can claim universal assent.

If you work in a workplace, try telling your coworkers, "You know, they're taking citizenship away from people who live near the borders. If they can do that to anyone, they could do that to us. I don't think it's right." You don't have to make it partisan or anti-Trump.

Yell at your elected representatives. Democratic politicians should be aware that the GOP is reshaping the electorate in their favor. It's cynical, but they have to care about that.

Tweet about it, share it on social media. These things are not sufficient but they are necessary.

Vote in November. Same.

I know it feels like making noise isn't doing anything except complaining and we're taught that talk is the opposite of action but I promise you: talk is an action. When there is enough of an outcry they back down. Not all the way always. But slowing and mitigating damage helps.

[imjustthemechanic]

Natalie Jones and the Golden Ship

Part 1/? - A Meeting at the Palace Part 2/? - Curry Talk Part 3/? - Princess Sitamun Part 4/? - Not At Rest Part 5/? - Dead Men Tell no Tales Part 6/? - Sitamun Rises Again Part 7/? - The Curse of Madame Desrosiers Part 8/? - Sabotage at Guedelon Part 9/? - A Miracle Part 10/? - Desrosiers’ Elixir Part 11/? - Athens in October Part 12/? - The Man in Black Part 13/? - Mr. Neustadt Part 14/? - The Other Side of the Story Part 15/? - A Favour Part 16/? - A Knock on the Window Part 17/? - Sir Stephen and Buckeye Part 18/? - Books of Alchemy Part 19/? - The Answers Part 20/? - A Gift Left Behind Part 21/? - Santorini Part 22/? - What the Doves Found Part 23/? - A Thief in the Night Part 24/? - Healing Part 25/? - Newton’s Code Part 26/? - Montenegro Part 27/? - The Lost Relic Part 28/? - The Homunculinus Part 29/? - The End is Near Part 30/? - The Face of Evil Part 31/? - The Morning After Part 32/? - Next Stop Part 33/? - A Sighting in Messina Part 34/? - Taormina

They finally catch up with Madame Desrosiers, and she has something surprising to say.

As they rumbled along the road to Taormina, Sir Stephen refused to let his argument against archaeology go.  “For another thing,” he went on, “the people and places you go to see did not ask to be objects of wonder.  Your Princess Sitamun, from what I have read of the Egyptians, hoped to have her funerary temple tended while her body and its sarcophagus rested undisturbed.  Or think of the villages we saw on the island of Santorini.  The people living there do nothing but serve the needs of visitors.  They have no industries of their own – I heard a woman tell her tour group that even water must be brought in, for there is none native to the island.”

“Pilgrimage towns were the same,” said Nat.  “During the high middle ages, tourism was almost the only industry in Santiago de Compostela.”

“But the people there were doing God’s work,” Sir Stephen said.  “And the relics of Saint James were meant to be seen, so that they could perform their miracles.  Saint James himself, were he able to watch, would be pleased.  Could you say the same thing of the Egyptians?”

Natasha just sighed.  They’d had this argument a dozen times before and they would doubtless have it again.  Sir Stephen just didn’t like digging up the dead.

“You can’t speak for them,” Jim spoke up.  “You’re not an ancient Egyptian.  You only know what you think.”

“I think I have a better understanding of the peoples of old than any of you,” said Sir Stephen, in a voice that rejected the entire twenty-first century.

“Princess Sitamun lived nearly three thousand years ago,” said Natasha.  “You were born nearly a thousand years ago, but that’s still closer to now than it was to her.  Even if it wasn’t, two millennia is such a long time, I don’t think it matters.  None of us know what the ancient Egyptians would have thought of us.”

“Then none of us should presume to speak for them,” said Sir Stephen.

“Let it go,” said Sharon, patting his arm.  “You won’t convince them and they won’t convince you.  Personally, I think the Egyptians don’t care, because they’re dead.”

Mount Etna itself had not been visible from Messina, only its towering column of cloud.  As they got closer, with dusk closing in, the volcano itself emerged from among the hills, taller than all of them and with its peak shrouded in mist lit eerily red from within.  The town of Taormina below it was a tiny place among a dozen similar tourist towns that looked down on the beach.  It was all arranged along one narrow, meandering medieval street behind a city wall, where shops sold everything from cheesy souvenir magnets and keychains to expensive designer jewelry, beach gear to hand-made marionettes and everything in between.

With the volcano currently putting on such a show, the population of the little town had swollen to capacity and beyond.  Not only was the main street full of shoppers, diners, and people enjoying various entertainments, roofs and balconies were covered with people, many of them with binoculars to view the mountain peak.  The whole place felt like it was having a party… but there was also an undercurrent of something much more ominous.  In particular, there were signs set up at the sides of the roads to direct people who were evacuating from higher up the slopes.

The six members of the CAAP and Jim made their way through the crowds of tourists, locals, and intermittent stray dogs to the Hotel Isabella.  Like the Europa Palace in Messina, this one had four stars, but as rather unprepossessing from the outside.  Its façade was a narrow stone building with an arched door, wedged in between a place selling football merchandise and another offering designer purses.  Nat went to the front desk, and asked if Mrs. Desrosiers were there.

“You missed her,” the clerk, a balding man wizened from a lifetime in the sun, replied.  It had become a depressingly familiar phrase, but what followed gave Nat renewed hope.  “Only by about ten or fifteen minutes, though – she met a friend and they went out for supper.  I don’t know when they’ll be back, but we have a bar if you’d like to wait for her.”

“What friend?” asked Natasha.  He couldn’t mean Newton, could he?  Every indication thad been that the two alchemists despised one another.  If it weren’t Newton, though, that suggested there was a third person involved here and that was the last thing they needed.  “Was it a German, with long white hair and a very ugly hat?”

“It was an older man,” the clerk said, “but I didn’t hear his voice enough to know if he were German.”

Newton was far from being history’s only famous alchemist.  Desrosiers had said her husband was dead, but history and legend were full of characters like Paracelsus or Agricola who, if alchemy were a real thing, might well be still around causing trouble.  That was a depressing thought, and it was mainly on that account that Nat decided to stick to believing Desrosiers’ friend was Newton until she saw evidence to the contrary.

“We’re gonna have to split up and search again,” she told her companions.  “If we’re only a few minutes behind her, we can’t lose the opportunity.”

“Somebody’s gonna need to stay here in case she comes back,” said Allen.

“Then you do that,” Nat told him.  “The rest of us will have to search the nearby restaurants.”  Unlike in Kotor and Santorini, most of the restaurants in Taormina were indoors, rather than spilling out into the streets.  There simply wasn’t room for them here.  That would slow them down considerably.

Sharon and Sir Stephen went together, of course, as did Sam and Clint, who seemed to have bonded in mutual mistrust of Jim.  That left Jim himself with Natasha – and that, she realized, meant they were going to have to talk about their sexual dalliance and what the rest of the group thought of it.  Nat would definitely pass on what Allen had told her, but she wondered whether Jim would believe her.  Would he think she was just sparing his feelings?

Sure enough, once they were away from the others, Jim brought it up almost immediately.

“I think I need to apologize,” he said.  “I didn’t realize they were gonna be so… it was selfish of me to ask you, and…”

“Don’t,” said Nat.  “I can’t take any more apologies.  You asked my permission, I gave it to you, we both enjoyed it, and they don’t care as much as it looked like.  I talked to Dad about it.”

It seemed he did believe the explanation when she passed it on, because he looked relieved.  “That’s… still really awkward.  But I wouldn’t want your colleagues to think less of you.”

“Oh, they wouldn’t,” said Nat.  “Trust me, I wouldn’t let them.”

Jim had to smile a little at that.  “I believe you.”

Meanwhile, Natasha had realized that the two of them were clearly marching down the street with a purpose – they were not blending in.  “We look too much like we’re on a mission,” she said.  “Slow down, and put an arm around me.”

Jim laughed.

“Seriously,” she gave him a poke.

“Just for the mission, huh?” asked Jim.  He put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her in, until their hips touched.  “Wouldn’t want to stand out.”

Nat smiled, too – she could have stopped herself, but right now it could be part of their act.  She rarely got to enjoy this kind of closeness.  Allen hugged her, but there was still a level on which he had to love her because he was, in whatever sense the word was meaningful, her father.  It was possible to argue that Jim didn’t have much choice, either.  He had no family or friends of his own, so if he needed human contact, his options to get it were extremely limited.

Yet at the same time… this was nice.  Maybe the honesty had something to do with it.  As Natasha had noted earlier, she rarely got to be honest with people.  Allen encouraged her to be honest no matter how terrible the truth might be, and yet she rarely did, just because she was afraid of hurting him with it.  Now, here she was and here was Jim, and they were both whatever they were.  If either of them had wanted to get close to anybody else, they would have had to lie about it, but not with each other.

Nat’s phone buzzed.  She stopped and pulled it out, and found a text message from Sharon.

We’ve got Desrosiers, it said.  She’s alone at the sushi place above the bus parking.

On our way, Nat texted back.  “Looks like we have to turn around,” she told Jim.

“Yeah, I saw,” he said.  “Does this mean we stop blending in?”

“Of course not,” Nat said, and patted his hand on her hip, indicating she wanted it to stay right there.

Just outside the city gate, next to the self-consciously spectacular Excelsior Palace Hotel, was a very tiny mobile midway consisting of a merry-go-round and a bouncy castle in a car park.  Just beyond those was a petrol station with a row of bank machines and a couple of elevators to go down to the parking garage below.  Beside that was a little restaurant serving sushi and antipasto on a balcony overlooking the bay, and Madame Desrosiers was sitting there as if waiting for somebody.

She was, as always, flawlessly dressed in a flowing gray dress and very tall heels, with a tortoiseshell comb in her hair.  She was sipping at a glass of water while staring out across the water at the lights on the Calabrian coast.  Every so often, she would glance at her watch, but she kept her back to them at all times, which Natasha thought was suspicious in itself.  If she were really expecting somebody, she ought to be facing the car park so she could see them coming.

Natasha approached.  The others, who’d been waiting for her, Jim, and Allen to join them, followed her.  When she got close to Desrosiers’ table, the woman looked up and said, “oh, it’s you again.”

“You say that as if you haven’t been sitting here for half an hour waiting for us,” said Nat.

Desrosiers sighed.  “Very well, sit down,” she said.  “I was worried I’d made it too difficult for you to find me, but I thought if I made it easy you’d get suspicious.”

“You’re right,” Nat said.  “Right now I’m extremely suspicious.”

They arranged themselves around her.  Natasha, Jim, and Sir Stephen sat with Madame Desrosiers, the other four at the table next to them.  Nat did notice that although her back was to the door, Desrosiers was also sitting closest to it, with the least furniture in the way.

She didn’t try to run immediately, though.  Instead, she looked at Jim and nodded.  “How are you feeling?” she asked.

“Fine so far,” he replied.  “I’d like to stay that way.”

Desrosiers shook her head.  “There’s not much to be done for that.  You can only continue to exist by being regularly replenished – and even then, you won’t change the way a human being would.  You won’t get older, your hair won’t grow… you will look the way you do now for however long you last.”

Jim looked crushed.  “Why didn’t you tell me that before?” he asked.

“Because you were already upset,” Desrosiers said.

He must feel like yet another bit of humanity had been stolen from him, Natasha thought.  She felt sorry for him – and yet they had to stick to the point and learn as much as they could before Desrosiers ran off again.  “Why did you want to meet us?” Nat asked.  “Was it to give Jim more doses?”  If it were only that, she would be… delighted on one level, deeply disappointed on another.

“No.  The rest is at home in my workshop and I can’t spare it on short notice,” said Desrosiers.  “I’m here to ask a favour.  You have Neustadt’s notebooks.  That’s why you went to Santorini, isn’t it?  I need them.”

[rannadylin]

Romance asks: 1, 4, 5, 7, 9, 10, 12, 15 for Vi/Eder and Lottie/Anselm; 2, 3, 8, 19, 20 Vi/Anselm letters AU; 21, 22, 24, 30 for all :) (#shippers gonna ship)

:-D Best ships!

Also ships about which I can get a little verbose, ahem, so I’m gonna post the following as a down payment on these asks and finish the rest tomorrow, because it’s bedtime and I’m nowhere near done with most of these.

For the CSI: Citlatl asks...

1. What drew your character to their LI and vice versa?

Vi/Edér: Vi was thrilled to find a fellow Eothasian in grimGilded Vale of all places, but it was his humor that drew her in first, andthen his loyalty. Edér was drawn to her sweet nature and strength of soul,faith, and resolve – someone worth following, and then someone he admired, andthen someone who – well in his words, from Clan andCourt, “Before I met Vi, I was convinced I was next in line to behanged on a tree like that back home. Didn’t try to run away or fight it oranything. Then this orlan girl shows up, staring at that tree like her soul’sleft her body, and changes everything. Gave me back my life. My faith. Mypurpose.”

Lottie/Anselm: Lottie’s had a crush on him for a long time,but Vi had dibs. She would’ve been pretty young when she was first drawn to him,so…to little-sister Lottie, her big sister’s betrothed seemed dashing,handsome, clever, assertive. (She’s not really wrong about any of that, but shehad a bit rosier view of him than the reality at that time.) Now, grown-upLottie is delighted by their conversationsas much as anything. She can bounce ideas off of him, he’s clever enough tokeep up with her, and he doesn’t just tolerate her infodumps out of kindnesswhile his eyes glaze over, as a fair portion of her family has been guilty ofoften enough. Anselm is drawn to her optimism and cheerful trust in people’sbetter natures – especially his; she always sees the best in people and throughthat he begins to accept how much he actually has changed for the better. She’salso got a cuteness and naivety about her that stirs his protective instincts –but then she turns out to be more capable than he initially gave her creditfor, and a valued partner.

7. Favorite date activity? 

Vi/Edér: Making breakfast together. Fishing. Making therounds of secretly Eothasian families in the Dyrwood.

Lottie/Anselm: Detectiving. :-D

12. Do they have similar goals? If they clash, how do theydeal?

Vi/Edér: Oh yes! In Vi’s Watcher worldstate, he ended up inthe Night Market, and she’s an Eothasian priest with a secret chapel in CaedNua, so they are devoted to keeping their god’s worship alive in the Dyrwood.

Lottie/Anselm: Both pursue knowledge, but he’s moreconcerned with the mysteries on his desk to be solved and she’s…curious abouteverything. Everything ever. When they’re working together on a case, includingthe Haven, Anselm sometimes has to redirect her to the present mystery insteadof whatever fun fact she just came across in her research.

For the Letters from Deadfire asks:

2. What was the first moment that they knew they were inlove with their LI? 

Vi/Anselm: Hm for the Letters from Deadfire worldstate,there’ll actually be two such moments for Vi: Once in the months after Clan& Court (the alternate version of it that doesn’t end with her courtingEdér) as Anselm sticks around to be Chief Investigator and eventually impressesher to the point that one day she realizes she’s enjoying having him around, without even a hint of the fear andresentment and resistance she’d carried over from their first courtship. And then a second moment, in her Deadfire travels,when she gets back just enough of her soul/memories from Eothas to rememberthat their betrothal has been renewed – but doesn’t yet remember that moment of knowing she was in lovewith him, she just infers that there must have been such a moment or some goodreason for her to court him again. And then through the letters she writes tohim from that point she gradually remembers little things from their timetogether at Caed Nua and puts together a picture of the man he became in herabsence from Citlatl, and realizes that yes, she loves him. For Anselm? Themoment she left Citlatl years ago and he knew he’d lost her for good – andresolved to be the person he should have been sooner, when they still had achance of working things out.

3. When they are having a fight, what is it about and how dothey deal with it? 

Vi/Anselm: They’re both pretty strong willed (high-Resolvein PoE terms XD actually I can’t remember what Resolve I gave Anselm in hisWatcher playthrough, but that’s not canon anyway, he’s crazy stubborn and so isshe, her Resolve actually was 22 with gear by endgame) so there are bound to bedifferences of opinion sometimes. They’ll have to learn when compromise isnecessary and when to stand their ground. They’re both very honest, which helpswith communication once a conflict is out in the open, but Vi has to learn notto just keep quiet and patiently suffer the little things that bother her, andAnselm has to learn to not always assume she’ll do things his way.

19. Describe how they communicate 

Vi/Anselm: Well in that AU there was a lot of communicationby letters that Vi could only hope would find him, and not all of them do. Butenough so that he can show up at the docks in New Heomar to welcome her homefrom the Deadfire. Also, beyond the modes of communication, if we’re describinghow well they communicate: one thing these two have in common is prettythorough honesty. Violet may tell a truth tactfully if she knows it’s going tobe hard to take, but she will still tell him the truth. Anselm can bewell-spoken and charming (not just with cipher charm ;-D) but not nearly astactful; rarely does he feel obliged to hold back on what he thinks ofsomething, so he can be brutally honest at times. They’d eventually both cometo rely on each other’s honesty a great deal.

For all:

21. Personally, do you think they are a good couple? 

Yes to all of them, though (hopefully) in different ways :-D

And now good night, Tumblr, sweet dreams of fluffy orlan ships!

[alwaysonthemend]

Destiel Rec List

NOTE - This is an old version of this post. A newer and more organized version can be found easily on my blog. I will no longer be updating this particular post.

- Works marked with (*) denote my absolute favorites.

-This rec list is mostly Destiel (I'm a clown 🤡, sue me.) Though there are a few that aren't.

-Some are full AUs, some only partially, while others are canon!verse. (I'll appreciate anything as long as it's well written.)

-Yes, some of these works have smut in them, but they can easily be skipped without losing important plot info. (Make fun of me all you want, but I don't like reading smut.)

-This list will be updated whenever I find a good fic, though probably not regularly if I'm honest. (Life happens...)

-I DO NOT own any of the work found on this list, nor do I claim it to be my own; I am simply making this so that others can enjoy these fics as well.

-Please do not hate on anyone or anything. If you don't like Destiel, then don't read the fics. If you hate the author, don't tell me because I don't care about that drama. (Walk AwaaAYyaYAaa)

1. Twist and Shout****** by @gabriel and @standbyme Archive Of Our Own.

Thoughts- I'm sure that there is nothing I can say that you haven't already heard. Just read it. Suffer along with the rest of us. There's fluff, smut, angst (the holy trinity.) This is truly the best fan fic ever written. Period. 20/10.

2. 300 Things by @cautionzombies. (I can't find the original source so you'll have to try and find it on your own...)

Thoughts- What's a Supernatural rec list without 300 Things? This really is an amazing fic and it is written so well!

3. How A Righteous Man Raises A Rose by @swordofmymouth- Live Journal.

Thoughts- This fic really took me by surprise. It's tagged as an AU, but I think you'll find that it's not at all what you think. The author effortlessly sets a mood of loss and regret, yet still gives the light a chance to shine through. I went into this fic thinking it to be an AU, and it was at first. But I soon realized that there was much more to this fic than what at first meets the eye. I shed a few tears over this one.

4. Cleanse the Mirror* by @takadainmate -Live Journal.

Thoughts- Man, this one hurts, but in the best way. I read this fic a long time ago but lost it and couldn't find it for a long time. I am so glad that I found it and was able to re read. Just as enjoyable (if not more so) the second time. Dean gets a better understanding of what it's like being an angel. (And Cas is written so well in this fic! He's just like he is in the show. It's incredible!)

5. A Hole in the World by @bauble - Live Journal.

Thoughts- This one just hurts and hurts and hurts. This is one that you'll just have to read and see for yourself. No happy ending. (You've been warned.)

6. In the Shadow of Your Wings by @EnochianThings - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is a really well written fic. There were several times that I almost forgot that I was reading a fan fic because the characters and story are just so well though out. It's a bit of a long one and is set in a (sort of) canon!verse.

7. My Throat is An Open Grave* by @inkandpaperqwerty - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This was one of the first fan fics that I ever read for Supernatural. This one is just so heartwarming, but not before plenty of angst and hurt/comfort. The author seamlessly puts Sam and Dean into a heartbreaking AU and it's all about the love that Sam and Dean have for each other. (NOT Wincest.)

8. Thursday's Child* by @strangeandcharm - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- All I can say is... Ow. Slow burn to end all slow burns, but so worth it in the end. This one is set in the End!verse (which I'm a total sucker for.) Dean and Cas are just so sad and I just want to hug them and make it all better. Imagine, Future!Dean's plan to kill Lucifer!Sam works and now he has to live with the fact that he killed his own brother, devil or not. And Cas has to come to terms with the fact that he survived the epic showdown, despite his belief that he wouldn't, and now has an addiction that he has to get under control. I love this fic and it really is a painfully slow read, but more than worth it in the end.

9. Après by @imogenbynight - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Dean and Cas go to Paris... Need I say more? I love this fic because it addresses the crappy way that Dean always has Cas coming to him and how Dean needs to step up and realize the sacrifices Cas has made for him (shameless bias opinion... Sorry) All us Cas stans will really appreciate this one. Written well, characterization flawless... What else can you ask for?

10. Dean's Days Off* by @MittenWraith - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is just the sweetest, fluffiest fic you could ever ask for. Reading it made me want to fall in love so badly it hurt. Cas and Dean just get some well deserved rest and quiet. I am absolutely in love with this fic and I'll read it over and over again. (Especially if I've had a bad day and need some happiness)

11. Unlit, Unmarked, and Forgotten by @awed_frog -

Archive Of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is a beautiful coda for 11x17. There's some Destiel if you squint. It's very sad but somehow manages a happy ending that renews your hope and brings a soft smile to your face.

12. Down Like Water by @museaway - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- I really like this fic a lot. It is very sad with a lot of Hurt!Castiel but it does actually have a happy ending. Just grit your teeth and bare through the angst and sadness to make it to the beautifully sappy ending.

13. Till Kingdom Come* by @freckles_n_feathers - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - This is a season 11 AU that was written before season 11 aired (the author actually somehow predicted things that were going to happen before they aired!!) This fic gave me really high hopes for season 11 that weren't quite fulfilled. I loved season 11, don't get me wrong (it's actually one of my favorite seasons) this fic was just so perfect and I wanted it to be canon so badly. (I re wrote this review like four times because I kept saying "actually" lol)

14. 12x19 Destiel Ficlet by @Samanstiel - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - This was written before 12x19 aired, and if you were upset with how things went down then this is the fic for you. The characters are written so well and it really feels like an actual episode.

15. Contrapasso*** by @takadainmate - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This might be the best fic ever (trumped only by Twist and Shout...) Inspired by Dantes Inferno and so beautifully written! I just... There aren't words. It's very dark, and the ending was not at all what I wanted (but after much thought, I realized that there couldn't have been a better ending.) I really got lost in this fic. I could see exactly what the author described, I could feel what the characters felt. This is true art... This is the fic we've all been looking for.

16. Put Up Your Dukes by @takadainmate - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This fic is by one of my favorite authors (who has featured on this rec list before...) Hilariously dirty. Dean and Cas are bone heads who can't make up there minds. Human!Cas is also a little sh*t and I'm living for it. There's some smutty times in this one... (which can easily be skipped if you're not comfortable without losing any important points of the story. {at least I didn't feel like I missed anything})

17. Then I Defy You Stars* by @speary - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - So many tears were shed while I read this. The plot is just so amazing and a plot twist to end all plot twists at the end. It's full of sacrifice and love and angst and bittersweet moments. I love this fic (and I promise you will too.)

18. All the Nights by @NorthernSparrow - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This takes place after 15x03 episode "Golden Time". A bit of a fix it fic, but canon compliant to a point. I really love this fic (I love anything written by NorthernSparrow). Also a case!fic, which I'm always a softie for. Some big questions that I have since season 15 are addressed in this fic, and I absolutely love the way they are answered.

19. A Winter's Tale* by @NorthernSparrow - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Oh my gosh. So much Hurt!Castiel. There isn't outright Destiel but there is heavy DeanCas relations. This is a season 9 re write and it just hurts so much. If you can make it through all the pain, the happy ending makes it all worth it. Human!Cas just deserves so much better... Ahh! It's just so sad and perfect and awesome.

20. Give All My Secrets Away by @morganoconner - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - This is a sweet little fic. Not particularly long, but oh so meaningful. Dean gets cursed and his soul is pushed from his body, leaving him vulnerable and scared (the author portrays the human soul in a very interesting way). Cas looks after him and it's just so fluffy.

21. Plot Holes* by @saltyfeathers - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Holy crap! This fic took me a whole week to finish and I enjoyed every minute of it! Every chance I got I would pull my phone out and read. I was rudely interrupted many many times so I just decided to finish it at night and stayed up until 2AM on a school night. (oops?) It's soooo well written and feels like an actual season of Supernatural. 12/10 all the way.

22. Someone Who's Feeling For Me by @ellispark - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: Here's a fic to kick you right in the feels. I actually really genuinely enjoyed reading this fic because of how well the characters are written! Dean, Sam, and Cas run into Lisa Braeden post her mind wipe in season 6 and it brings up a whole bunch of drama for our boys. (While also helping Dean realize that she was never really the person he wanted to be with 😉) A bit of light smut and a bit of angst but definitely worth a read.

23. Chalk and Chainmail by @angelwingsandthings - Wattpad.

Thoughts : Oh this one is so good... It's very angsty at times and Dean is a lovable dork who can't win no matter what he does and Cas is just a confused little assbutt who doesn't know what to do with himself. (So he's himself if we're being perfectly honest here 😂) There's some light smut but nothing too graphic. This one is a Highschool!AU, so prepare yourself for the delightful drama that comes along with teenage hormones. (And Charlie is a total QUEEN and I'm living for it. I love her so much.)

24. Remember When * by @VioletHaze - Archive of Our Own

Thoughts: Sooo... I've been on a bit of a School!fic kick recently. (Not a little bit. Like a lot a bit thb) This one is just so god da*n perfect (scuse my French) Dean and Cas have been best friends since fifth grade; they do everything together. Then some crap happens and they get in a huge fight junior year. Years later, they finally make it back to each other. (*Cries in fangirl*) Warning, it's sad, it hurts like heck. But there's also so many perfect moments. I promise you won't regret reading it. (And once again Charlie is a total queen and I would give my life for her. She deserves so much better... {SPN writers I'm looking at you.})

25. Everytown, USA by @aileenrose - Archive Of Our Own.

Thoughts : I've seen this fic on tons of recs but never really thought much of it. But I kept seeing it so I decided to give it a read and boy was it worth it! This is just a great fic that has plenty of fluff (And angst... Because what's a Destiel fic without sadness and pain?) Cas is a lot different from his character in the show but somehow the exact same? He's Cas, but it's like he's what Cas would have been like if he had grown up human. I just love him so much in this fic (and I want to give him a hug too... 😢)

26. I Through My Window by @dehavilland - Live Journal.

Thoughts: I've seen this fic on several recs and I finally got around to reading it myself. Some ample Destiel angst to hit you right in the feels. But I love this fic because it is incredibly motivating! Post season 5 canon-divergent and Castiel is permanently rendered human. Dean is a ginormous penis head and leaves Cas to fend for himself. Cas pines after him for a while before realizing that he doesn't need Dean to live his life. Cas stans will love this one. I just gotta include a quote because it's just beautiful. "No, I don't need you. But I want you."

27. A Light for My Path* by @domesticadventures - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts : Oh my goodness. This fic is just... *chefs kiss* Told from the perspective of Cas' Continental. (A.K.A "Connie") Dean and Cas are having a difficult time figuring out who they want to be after the end of the last The-End-Of-Times-We're-All-Gonna-Die, but they figure it out together. There are plenty of Impala!pov fics (and even an actual episode), but I don't think I've ever come across one from Connie's perspective. Definitely worth a read.

28. Named* by @RC_McLachlan - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts : Hooo boy. This fic.... This is a complete season five re write and I LOVE IT. It's pretty angsty, but it also has some funny times thrown in. Dean is a sassy girl the whole time and I love him so much. And the plot twist at the end literally blew my mind. (brains splattered on the ceiling and everything.) 12/10.

29. And Even In The Quiet Night by @KelpietheThundergod - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: Okay, this one is pretty sad. Not full on angst, but more fluffy sad. (If that makes sense...) Dean wants to celebrate Christmas but no one else seems interested. I just want to wrap Dean in a blanket and sing Hey Jude until he feels better! But don't worry, an absolute beautifully written cliche and sappy ending will make up for it.

30. Just More of the Same (*??) by @outpastthemoat - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts : There really aren't words to describe this series. It's just so fricken bleak but beautiful at the same time. I really don't know how to describe it. Read it, the only regret is that it ends. I honestly hated how it ended, so unfullfilling. But, that's life sometimes, and I think that's the whole point of the series. I don't know if I love it or hate it but there's no denying that it is absolutely beautifully written. 12/10

31. the cost of a thing**by @quiettewandering - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: Hooo boy! This is a great fic! Fake marriage? Check. Slow burn? Check. Case!fic? Check. Fluff and angst? Check. This fic has it all. This fic kicked me right in the feels. My gosh, beautifully written and the characterization is FLAWLESS. But trust me, bring tissues as you watch Dean and Cas, slowly, painfully, but surely heal the trust that was shattered between them. This is an AU for season 8 in which Dean was the one who undertook the trials, not Sam. Dean is dying and there's nothing Sam and Cas can do to stop him, especially since Dean is insistent on just giving up and accepting his fate. Cas can save Dean's life, but at what cost? Surely a terrible one... Angst insues. 10/10.

32. I'll Dig a Hole and Pull You Through by @JoCarthage - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: If yall hated the DeanCas interaction in season six (didn't we all...?) then this is the fixit!fic for you. In this fic, Dean helps Cas defeat Raphael. And boy, there's some flangst. (Also Dom!Cas is a thing 😏)

33. Stitches by @Askance - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: I wouldn't exactly call this a fixit!fic, buuut it is a sort of fixit for season 7. (Except Cas gets hurt, which I hate. {So does Dean...}) Cas survives the Laviathan taking over his vessal but is rendered blind. Sam and Dean have to take care of him. Loads of whump and hurt/comfort. Definitely shed a tear or two (or twenty.)

34. The Way Out* by @awed_frog - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: *fangirl noises*. I hate to say this, but OMG! This fic blew my frickin mind! The time line is very confusing and the author gives you a way to read it in chronological order, but it's worth it to read the way it was published. Everything starts making sense around the third to last chapter and it is glorious (-ly sad and angsty.) But there is a happy ending and it's soooo worth it. First timetravel!fic I've ever read and it did not disappoint.

35. What is Hidden, What is Seen* by @ExpatGirl.

Thoughts : Wow! This is a pretty long fic but so worth it. The author joked several times about the fact that the fic is longer than her Masters thesis. This is a complete season 11 re write and I LOVE it. It's got some beautifully written OCs, Crowley, Rowena, and a certain someone who needs to come back canonically. (Again, looking at you Spn writers...) This is just written so well and the author was able to put in small Easter eggs the whole way through just like any real season would. Some light smut but nothing too graphic, angst (Hello, my name is angst but you can call me Destiel.) There's even some humour in here too! All in all, an absolutely beautifully written fic.

36. And This, Your Living Kiss*** by @opal_bullets - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts: Okay, first off, insert fangirl screams here! I LOVED this fic. (And not just because I'm a clown {which I totally am} but for some personal reasons I'll elaborate on in a sec...) This is an amazingly written, thought-provoking, and heartwarming fic to read. I loved it especially as it featured poet!Dean which I don't find a lot of. Now, I particularly liked this fic because it really hit home for me. The author described exactly how I feel when it comes to poetry. They described how poets often write best in times of sadness and misery and how we often stop writing because we are destroying ourselves in our own heads and can find nothing to write about when we finally allow ourselves to be happy. The author puts it perfectly in this fic. Not only did the fic make me rethink some of the opinions that I've had on poetry writing for years, but it also inspired me to pick up my pen again after not writing for almost a year and a half. So, thank you to the author for getting me back into writing poetry. (I can't thank you enough! ❤️) Please read this fic yall!

37. What We Remember by @Tiro - Fanfic.net

Thoughts : (Not Destiel btw) Oh my Chuck. This is soooo sad. Some nice emotionallyscarred!Dean for ya. It starts out so unassuming too! Totally blindsided me with the angst. But also some brotherly love between Sam and Dean. Definitely worth a read. (P. S, I'm writing this from the floor of my room while I sob in fangirl.)

38. More or Less by @schmerzerling - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Oh my goodness this is such a great fic. Lots of emotional angst and trauma (Just the way I like it.) This fic is so amazing and I loved every minute of it. There are so few stutter!Dean fics out there. This fic is unfinished and hasn't been updated since 2016 but I think it is still worth a read. The point at which the fic is left off has no immediate cliff hangers so I think that the fic can still be appreciated as is. Definitely worth a read.

39. Every Part of the Animal (*?) by @Askance and @Komodobits - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - I hate this fic. I hate how dam* near perfectly written it is. I hate it for the hours I spent crying. I hate it for the hope it gave me before ripping it away like it was a game. This fic was recommended to me on a group chat. I was warned. I was warned that it was a terrifying, horrific, and heartbreaking fic. What did I do?? I read it anyway. (Shocker, I know...) This fic is genuinely terrifying. It's horrific and I have to say, READ THE THE TAGS. Beautifully written, as to be expected by the authors. (Both of whom have featured on this list before.) This is a case fic gone horribly, horrifically, disgustingly wrong. 10/10 would recommend, but be warned: there is NOT a happy ending.

40. Hautley's Bend **** by @ColdInTheStudio - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Okay! So, first of, if you aren't into long fics this is absolutely NOT the fic for you. A whopping 42 chapters, all masterfully written without a flaw or typo in sight. I LOVE this fic with all my heart. I mean, I'm an absolute clown when it comes to Highschool!AUs, but this fic is just... *chef's kiss. * This is the Highschool!fic you have all been wanting. It's got angst, it's got fluff, emotional trauma, not to mention some fan favourite characters. (Gabriel, Charlie, and Kevin to name just a few.) But you should check out the tags before reading as there's some heavy stuff dealt with in this fic: Dean is not a very nice person at the beginning of this fic. There's also underage drinking and detailed substance abuse. Self harm is also pretty prominent in this fic as well as some A+ John Winchester parenting. But the pain is so, so worth it. Bring tissues!

41. Stay With Me, Sweetheart by @MandalaRose - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - The fluff is too much! I mean, we got firefighter!Dean saving Cas' life! (For Chuck's sake...What more could you ask for?) Also some single father Cas caring for a baby Clair, so some cute daddy!Cas for your troubles. So sweet and heartwarming and a very happy ending. 10/10.

42. Season Z*** by @Castielslostwings, @CR Noble, @cutelittlekitty, @EllenOfOz, @fangirlingtodeath513, @heylittleangel, @jscribbles, @MalMuses, and @son_of_a_bitch_spn_family - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - So you might notice that there are LOTS of authors listed above and they all came together to create something beautiful. They started publishing chapters right after the season 14 finale and published a chapter every week until the season 15 premier. This is, essentially, a complete season 15 re write. It is masterfully done! Team Free Will vs. a zombie apocalypse. Also, lots and lots of old faces all brought together to save the world one last time. There's some heartbreak, some love, some smut, some fluff. (Also some Samwena to make everything even better.) 22 long chapters, each feeling like an actual episode, made this fic seem like an actual season. (And I wish the writers would steal from this fic's finale and make some... stuff... finally canon.) Truly a timeless Destiel masterpiece.

43. Something about Pinneaples by @lizleenimbus - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - This is an EXTREMELY adorable little DeanCas ficlet. No angst, no Big Sad ™, just sweet sweet, tooth rotting Destiel fluff.

44. Last Night on Earth by @the_communist_unicorn - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Sooo, I'm sure we all remember that disastrous night out, when the first big ol Apocalypse was gearing up, and Dean found out that Cas was an eons-old virgin... And I'm sure we all remember the disaster that was Cas and a prostitute. Anyways, here's what might have happened if Dean had taken a bit more of a... hands on approach. 😏 The chapters are all episodes that took place after the season five episode "Free To Be You And Me" and how they would have unfolded had Destiel become canon. I will warn you, their is smut (easily skippable) and there is DEFINITELY some angst. The whole thing is capped off with a bittersweet alternate ending to season five finale "Swan Song." I can't say much else without spoiling the ending, but all in all it is a very good fic to read.

45. Painted Angels *** by @WinJennster - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- HOLY FRAHOLY. I love this fic. A beautiful take on the classic trope of "We Had Something Good But I Ruined It, Now I'm Gonna Show Up Twelve Years Later And Try To Fix It... Also You're Engaged To Someone Else. Oops?" But seriously, all joking aside, this is an awesome fic. Painter!Dean x Writer!Cas, a match made in Heaven. (Hehe, get it? Heaven? Sorry I'll leave.) HOWEVER, do please be mindful of the tags. There is mentions of suicide and a couple paragraphs describing a rather grizzly accident to one of the main characters. Also, some lovely A+ John Winchester Parenting ™ and several instances of homophobic language. Still, this is an amazingly written fic and I can't stress how much I enjoyed it.

46. Forgotten *** by @NorthernSparrow - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- So, first off, I have to talk about the author for a little bit. I have read every single fic by Northern Sparrow and EVERY SINGLE ONE is a friggin masterpiece. The amount of research and backstory that goes into these fics is truly awe-inspiring. Northern Sparrow leaves no plot holes, no mistakes, no typos, nada. Now, the actual fic in question is no exception. While not particularly a Destiel fic, it can be taken as pre slash. There is a sequel, a Destiel version and a non Destiel version, called Flight that I am currently reading as well. (The Destiel version of course 🤡) There is some serious whump and angst here, both physical and emotional. This fic is a canon divergent from around mid season 9, in which there is no Mark of Cain and is a continual re write of the season. Cas goes through a lot in this fic (my poor baby) and Dean and Sam go through some gnarly stuff as well. This is such a good fic, I really can't stress enough. I wish I was half as talented as Northern Sparrow is when it comes to writing stories. I promise, you will NOT be disappointed. 12/10

47. All is safely gathered in by @randomdestielfangirl - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Here is a cute little coda for season 12 episode 6, “Celebrating the Life of Asa Fox.” It’s mostly Mary-centric and her understanding of the Dean/Cas relationship. I’ve always had a soft spot for season 12 codas where Mary sees that Dean and Sam have grown up. (Especially those that have DeanCas in them.)

48. Bring Up the Deep by @deathbanjo - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Here is a pretty cool case!fic with eventual Destiel fluff at the end. The story line is a little heavy and dark, but nothing more than canon-typical violence. This involves Sam, Dean, and a human Cas traveling to the beach to investigate a “sea monster.” Fair warning, there are moments describing Cas’ depression and struggle with figuring out who he is and who he wants to be, but again, not as bad as season 9... (STILL not forgiving the writers for that fiasco.)

49. Hazy Shade of Winter by @GeekPrincess - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Here is yet another case!fic. This one has Team Free Will and Mary teaming up to solve a case in rural Wyoming in the middle of winter. It takes place not too long after Mary’s resurrection and Sam being freed from the British Men of Letters. At first it seems to be just a normal case, but per Winchester fashion, someone ends up getting attacked. Definitely worth a read.

50. A Little Old Fashioned by @theheartchoice - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Another coda, sorry... (I’ve been going through a faze) This one takes place in the aftermath of 14x13 episode “Lebanon.” I was disappointed that Cas didn’t play that big of a role in the 300th episode. I thought for sure he would considering he WASN’T EVEN IN THE 200TH EPISODE. *Clears throat* Umm, ya. Just some Destiel fluff of Cas taking care of Dean’s wounds the old fashioned way after John’s departure.

51. Same Deep Water by @braezenkitty - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Team Free Will heads to California to investigate a string of mysterious deaths in a supposedly haunted hotel called the Brookdale Lodge, nestled in the redwoods of Santa Cruz. I particularly enjoyed this fic because it has a definite early SPN vibe. Very creepy and eerie and reminded me a lot of No Exit (2x06) and Playthings (2x11). Also a bit of flirty!Cas and jealous!Dean.

52. Looking for a Sign* by @emwebb17 - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- THIS FIC... is sooo adorable. Holy Chuck. Dean meets Cas on his bus ride to work and tries to talk with him. Not realizing that Cas is deaf, Dean just assumes he’s being ignored and goes out of his way to get Cas to interact with him. After weeks of no response he finally realizes that Cas can’t hear him and so Dean offers that they start over with their acquaintanceship. Dean meets all of Cas’ friends and they quickly grow closer and closer. They would be perfect for each other except Cas refuses to date hearing people. (Also, bonus points for the pun in the title.)

53. Peanut Butter-Pumpkin Wedding Cake by @Sparseparsley - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- I’ve seen this fic on so many rec lists and I’m so mad that it took me this long to finally read it. Bartender!Dean meets Cas at a bachelor party and they hit it off right away. Then, when Cas’ car breaks down, Dean offers to drive him around to make preparations for the upcoming wedding. Dean has a massive crush, but thanks to Dean’s remarkable ability to jump to conclusions, he thinks that Cas is the one getting married in 2 weeks. Read it just for the sake of watching two idiots dance around each other for weeks on end. They aren’t fooling anyone but themselves.

54. My Marble Guardian by @LadyDrace - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Bring tissues cuz this one hurts like a season 12 finale. (Heh. I’m hilarious.) Dean is killing himself trying to support little Sam after their parents die. Dean is close to ending it all and takes to talking to the marble angel statue that sits by his mother’s grave. I can’t say much else without spoiling the ending so you’ll have to read it yourself to find out how it ends.

55. The Law of Equivalent Exchange** by @awed_frog - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Holy crap! This fic is truly amazing. @awed-frog is one of my favourite authors of all time. (And has featured on this rec list before.) This fic follows Castiel caring for his ward, a man who will one day be called Dean Winchester. Follow Cas through Rome, Greece, Paris, Russia, Germany, and more as he guides the impossibly bright soul that Heaven claims will one day save them all. In other words, Cas is sent to earth to watch over Dan, son of Enoch and continues to do so until January 24th, 1979, the day Dean Winchester is finally born. The fic then becomes canon-compliant all the way until season 11, then stems into a canon-divergent for defeating Amara. All from Cas’ POV, we see how he went from being Castiel, Angel of Tears and Thursdays to Cas, Angel of Dean Winchester. 12/10.

56. A Way Back Home* by @thatpeculiarone - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Another AU with deaf!Cas. Dean is a lonely bakery owner whose past is full of heartbreak and loss. He meets Clair Novak, a mute girl who has no one to talk to, after Jody suggests that they meet. Neither are too keen on the idea at first, but they soon discover a perfect remedy for their predicament. Dean loves to tell stories and Clair loves to hear them. Dean has a story for every pastry in his bakery, and Clair soon realizes that all of Dean’s stories seem to revolve around one person. After finally discovering why Dean always looks sad when no one is looking, hates Valentines Day with a passion, and only ever talks about his best friend in the past tense, Clair is determined to help Dean get the happily-ever-after that he never got to have.

57. Such Familiar Magic by @saltnhalo - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This fic was inspired by the artwork of very talented @lizleeships here on Tumblr. This is the first witch AU I’ve ever read and it did not disappoint. Cas is a reclusive witch with unimaginable power and Dean is one of the most powerful familiars in North America. Both of our boys have some dark secrets and ghosts from their pasts threaten to separate the two for good.

58. I'm fine by @lizleenimbus - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Can I just say, WOW. This one is yet another small ficlet to go along with @lizleeships artwork. This fic, despite its short length, is so potent and amazing! The writer effortlessly blends the canon SPN with the world of Destiel and I am LIVING for it. The somber and quiet nature of this fic makes it an excellent read for a late at night fanfic session.

59. The Shadows on his Shoulders by @lizleenimbus (Yes, I know. Two in a row... I don't care.)- Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Okay, first off, @lizleenimbus has become one of my favourite fic writers EVER. This fic is canon compliant (sort of) for season 6, just when Dean is beginning to figure out that something is wrong with Sam. (In the soul department, that is.. .) This here is a wingfic to end all wingfics. I love the writing, the characterization, the plot, everything, just... *chefs kiss.*

60. The Care and Feeding of Castiel by @MalMuses - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Soooo, another wingfic!! (No, I don't have a problem. YOU have a problem...) I am a total sucker for wing!grooming DeanCas fics. I just, gosh! I love them so much! I love this fic more every time, no matter how many times I've read it before.

61. Asunder by @rageprufrock - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Now, listen here lil clowns. Everyone loves a good "I need a plus one for my brother's wedding" trope and this here fic is the perfect one. And if you don't love it, this is absolutely NOT the fic for you. Sam is getting married and Dean doesn't want to go to it alone, so he enlists the company of his best friend Cas to go with him. Shenanigans and misunderstandings ensue, topped off with a healthy serving of meddling family members. A great rainy afternoon read.

62. Good Call by @sysrae - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - First, please be mindful of the tags as Dean meets Cas by talking him off of a ledge. However, despite the horrible start, this series is still incredibly fluffy and sappy. It also has Therapist!Benny being exasperated by Dean and Cas' utter stupidity around each other. This is a very heartwarming fic that balances the angst with fluff perfectly.

63. 'Tis but a Crush by @Annie D - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - Here is an awesome little meet cute modern AU fic! Cas notices that a man with startling green eyes stares at him whenever they are together. Cas is interested immediately but the green eyed man seems too shy to approach Cas. Fluff and awkward moments soon follow.

64. Where There's Smoke, Theres Fire** by @OsirisApollo - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts - So, first of, I am absolutely in LOVE with Firefighter!Dean. Cas is an ER doctor who meets Dean after the fire alarm in his apartment building goes off. Cas manages to make a fool of himself but is comforted by the fact that he'll never see the attractive firefighter again. Boy, was Cas wrong. The two men seem to run into each other practically everywhere, and no matter how hard Cas tries, he always seems to embarrass himself with every meeting. This fic was responsible for making me squeal aggressively at 2 AM. 10/10 Destiel fluff.

65. Forget - Me - Not -Blues*** by @noangelsinthegarrison - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is a fic that I go back and read over and over again. It’s got a perfect balance of fluff and angst, misunderstandings, and a healthy dose of clueless, meddling family and friends. Bottom line is, Sam is getting married and Dean is going to be the best man. He’s thrilled, until he finds out that Castiel Novak is Jess’ honorary Maid of Honour. Dean and Cas had a... something or other back in high school. Dean would ask to be friends again but Cas is intent on pretending that they never knew each other in the first place. Misunderstandings, awkward moments, and an obscene amount of embarrassment ensues, no thanks at all to the “tradition” surrounding the Maid of Honour and the Best Man. 10/10.

66. Ignore the Butterflies: Best Friend Advice from Dean Winchester by @impatient14 - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Okay, this one has practically every romcom trope out there... AND I AM LIVING FOR IT. (*Clears throat) Ya, soooo. Doctor Cas and Firefighter Dean are friends. Best friends actually. Totally platonic bros. A bromance for the ages. The broist bros to ever bro. That’s it. No homosexual feelings to be found here. None at all... Or so Dean tries to convince himself.

67. Prosopagnosia by @misseditallagain - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Man, this fic is really adorable and quite heartbreaking at times. Cas has a cognitive disorder that means he can’t ever remember faces. He’s given up on finding love until he meets one Dean Winchester, but he’s afraid to tell his hot date the truth about his condition. Assumptions are made and misunderstandings threaten to tear the two apart for good, but maybe there’s a chance for these two after all.

68. Midnight Blues AKA To Hell and Back (Courtesy of Sig Sauer) by @outofminutes - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- As we all know, I am a glutton for damaged!Dean being cared for by Cas. Dean is a war veteran. He’s been discharged for five years but he hasn’t dared to go back home until now. He’s not the same person he was all those years ago and the constant haunting of horrors past threaten to tear him apart. Thankfully, he’s got a loving family and a new friend (Hehe. Guess who. Sorry, I’ll leave) to help him pick up the pieces. 

69. Scars by @lemonsorbae - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Okay, first off: WOOOO 69! NOICE! OKay, I’m done... So, this fic stands out to me for the writers unique take on some popular tropes. Dean is a tattoo artist with green hair (Insert Priestly from Ten Inch Hero here.) and Cas is the stereotypical hipster. They don’t get along very well at the beginning of this fic. (Which is a HUGE understatement btw). Then, a drunken party leads to certain... unsavory actions, and both swear that it will never happen again. And that’s a total lie. Lots of smutty times in this one so be warned, also references to past trauma for both of our favourite boys so please mind the tags before reading.

70. The One Thing You Can’t Lose by @MajorEnglishEsquire - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is just a cuddly, tooth-rottingly fluffy little ficlet for some happy DeanCas feels. Warning: Do not read in public place for there WILL be squeals.

71. The Ugly Sweater Verse by @nerdylittledude - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- I know, I know. Everyone who’s ever read Destiel fanfiction has heard of the Ugly Sweater Verse. I don’t care! I’m reccing it anyway. A newly human Castiel wants to experience every holiday to its fullest, dragging Dean and Sam (But mostly Dean) along with him. This is an AU for after season 5 in which Sam is alive, Cas is human, and Dean finally gets his head out of his ass. (With a little... okay a lot of help from the rest of Team Free Will.) This is an awesome feel-good Verse that is always nice to read after a bad day. There is a prequel to this Verse that is stand-alone, but you don’t have to read it to get the rest of the Verse. (Also, if you’re only looking for fluffy times then I wouldn’t recommend reading the prequel. You have been warned.)

72. Cats and Tats by @cryptomoon - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This here is the quintessential Coffee Shop AU that no one asked for. Cas owns a coffee shop that is right next door to a tattoo shop owned by our own Dean Winchester. Dean doesn’t like the pastel coffee shop because it totally ruins his badassery vibe, and Cas doesn’t need another distraction like Dean, and poor Sam never gets a moments peace.

73. Moving On by @BruisedCastiel - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Castiel is a witch who reads fortunes for a living. One day he gets a customer named Dean whose reading has a shocking outcome. Not too much later, Dean’s ghost comes looking for Castiel seeking answers. This fic starts out pretty sad and things look hopeless for Dean and Cas but don’t worry! There IS a happy ending.

74. Into the Fire** by @NorthernSparrow- Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- I’ve mentioned on this list before that NorthernSparrow is my favourite fic writer of all time. And their work has been featured several times on this list before. Now, be warned. This fic gets VERY dark VERY quickly. Dean, shortly after the Mark of Cain is removed, is cursed and he kills Cas. The trauma of the Mark, the guilt he feels for killing Cas, and the looming threat of the Darkness sends Dean into a mental breakdown. Sam, mourning the loss of Cas himself, is left to try and put together what is left of Dean’s sanity AND to come up with a plan to defeat the Darkness. Sam and Dean, with the help of several allies, come together to save the universe once and for all. This is a full AU starting sometime in early season 11 and finishes all the way through the end of the season. There is a lot of sadness and guilt in this fic, so please be careful going into it. Bring tissues. I cried gratuitously throughout this fic. But don’t worry because THERE IS A HAPPY ENDING. Bonus points for TrueForm!Cas. 15/10.

75. There’d Be No Distance by @imogenbynight - Archive Of  Our Own.

Thoughts- Just a short, feel-good, fluffy Christmas fic for ya. Cas is lonely on New Years because he assumes that he won’t be welcome to the family get-together. But don’t worry! Dean sets the record straight with his angel. (Well...Not straight but... you know what I mean.)

76. Imperfect Proposals by @Fallen_Angel_Meg - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Okay, so, Cas is a total jerk at the beginning of this fic. He’s demanding, arrogant, cruel, and just rude to practically everyone who works at his firm. Dean is his new assistant and needs this job if he’s ever going to make it as an architect, but Castiel isn’t making it easy for him. Things get more complicated when Cas is threatened with being deported so he says that Dean is his fiance. Dean isn’t on board until Cas threatens to fire him if he doesn’t play along. Now they just  have to make it through Sam and Jess’ wedding. Easy... Right?  (There IS a happy ending it just takes these two idiots a while to get there.)

77. The Novak Hickey Mystery by @FagurFiskur - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is just a short ficlet involving Professor Novak’s mysterious relationship and some VERY nosy students. Nice and quick happy-go-lucky fic with no angst and plenty of tooth rotting fluff.

78. Come Back* by @lizleenimbus - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is yet another short, canon-verse ficlet for you guys. (I know these last couple fics have been pretty short but I have been reading so many long fics recently that I’ve needed a bit of a mental break from the stress of a slow burn lol) Anyways, this is one of my favourite authors. Literally, every single thing by this author is a freaking gold mine of Destiel goodness. This particular ficlet chronicles Dean and Cas sharing an intimate conversation after a particularly nasty hunt. I love these types of fics in which Dean and Cas actually Use There Words™ and talk like Grown Ups™. (Never happens canonically so I’ll take what I can get. Looking at you SPN writers.) ALSO, this fic is inspired by artwork by everyone’s favourite go to Destiel artist @lizleeships! 10/10!

79. And then there were Six* by @lizleenimbus - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- I know, I know. Two in a row by the same author... This author rocks okay! (Seriously, go check them out) This right here is a wing fic my friends. But not the type we are used to. It involves a bashful Cas, flustered Dean (And I know we ALL love a flustered Dean), and a very amused little brother. I love this ficlet especially as it is a beautiful take on the fact that Seraphim are supposed to have six wings.

80. Autrement, Danger - or, The Account of an Exceedingly Long Day by @awed_frog - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Here’s another fic from a “rec list favourite” author of mine. This is a pretty cool case fic with an awesome monster of the week. (Japanese folklore at its finest.) A creature manifests itself as a person’s true love. Sam sees Jess, Cas sees Dean, Dean sees Cas (And has a freakout along the way.)

81. Memories Bring Back Memories (Bring Back You) by @sobsicles - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Hoooo Boy! Talk about an angst fest. Set sometime in early season 15, Dean and Cas get their memories wiped and Dean is convinced that they are serial killers on the run from some tall guy named Sam. Things get awkward when they get their memories back, as they also remember what the two of them did when they were on the run together. Dean talks out of his a*s, Cas gets angry (rightfully so), Sam and Eileen just want a moments peace, and LOTS of bad blood gets let out out into the open for the first time in years. This fic was hard to read because, true to Winchester fashion, Dean and Cas’ communication during this fic is TERRIBLE. Just when you think the two of them are about to hash things out, one of them goes and says something stupid and they have to start all over again. I definitely recommend this fic, but be prepared to brave some hardcore angst before Dean and Cas get their happy ending.

82. Lost in Words, Hand in Hand* by @hallowgirl - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is the fluffiest fluffy fic to ever fluff! (Try saying that 10 times fast.) Dean tells Cas that he never got read to as a child, so Cas takes it upon himself to read to Dean. It was supposed to be a one time thing, but the two enjoy the time together more than they thought they would. Plus, there’s so many books to read, and laying in the same bed is just practical. That’s it. Just guys being dudes. And if Dean happens to fall asleep on Cas’ shoulder? Well, that’s not his fault at all. (Also, bonus points for Sam being the typical smug little bro who lets Dean know that he and Cas aren’t as subtle as they think they are.

83. La Hantise** by @quiettewandering - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Okay so, I have been waiting to read this fic for FOREVER. I read the first couple chapters a long time ago (back when it was still a WIP) and I immediately fell in love. I decided, rather painfully, to stop reading and save it to my Marked For Later until it was finished. I have a hard time when it comes to WIPs because I forget what I read during the previous update and I often times lose interest until I can read it all in one go. I couldn’t wait to read it and I was not disappointed! This fic is BEAUTIFULLY written and the story seems to come to life before your eyes. This is the Destiel we all fell in love with; Two damaged and broken beings finding peace within each other. Warning: these two are complete idiots and there’s a lot of pining and some pretty hefty angst. Castiel’s backstory is truly, completely and utterly, tragic. Dean’s isn’t a picnic either I suppose, but it’s Cas past that comes back to haunt Dean and Cas in this fic. The author seamlessly interweaves the reality with the make believe and it sucks the reader into the story effortlessly. 14/10. A Destiel classic.

84. Cheers, Angel Eyes by @wannaliveindeansdimples - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- As I’m sure you all know by now, I am in love with bartender! and barista!Dean. This fic has a healthy dose of bartender!Dean for you. In this fic, Castiel, known to Dean only as Angel Eyes, is a regular at the bar that Dean owns. The two hit it off during the few conversations that they have and decide to give themselves a chance. Very minimal angst and only just a small bit of pining from Dean’s POV. A very good, quick, none painful read.

85. best friends without benefits by @lizbobjones - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This fic is set between the end of season 11 and the beginning of season 12 and is canon divergent for the most part. This one is pretty funny and enjoyable to read, if only for the sake of poor Sam and Mary dealing with two complete idiots. Dean lets slip to Cas that he finds Cas driving Baby “hot” and Cas admits that he has known of Dean’s attraction for years. Cas proposes he and Dean enter a Friends With Benefits relationship and Dean just can’t say no. But Dean just digs himself deeper and deeper into trouble after he mistakes Cas’ preposition as a rejection of deeper feelings. Misunderstandings happen, Dean is a big baby, Cas is clueless, and Sam is stuck in the middle.

87. Shifter by @@LadyLini - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- There are tons and tons of fics out there where Dean and Cas are the bumbling idiots of the story (Yes, just like in the show) and Sam is the one who has everything figured out. But this fic looks at the idea of Sam being the one out of the loop and Dean and Cas being the ones who actually know what the heck is going on. This is a cool AU in which Sam went to Stanford, John Winchester is still an ass hole, and Destiel is canon. This was a cool take on how the events of the show would have taken place if Sam wasn’t there and Cas had been the one to save Dean from Azazel.

89. diamond star halo by @jad - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is a wonderfully light-hearted little fic in which Cas possesses Dean while his vessel recovers from the attack dog spell. We also get some great brotherly banter, Cas and Dean bickering like an old married couple, and other Team Free Will shenanigans. Also, poor Sam.

90. like moses and batman and james dean by @saltyfeathers - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Oooohh boy. This fic is quite the can of worms for me. Here, the author gives us a more detailed account of Dean’s past of turning tricks in order to raise liittle Sammy, and how this past is affecting his current relationship with our Wayward Angel. This is a heavier fic and please be mindful of the tags (Yes, John Winchester’s A+ parenting is one of them...) But it DOES have a happy ending.

91. any port in the storm by @mishcollin - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- If you are looking for a case!fic with Dean and Cas pretending to be dating on a couple’s cruise then you have come to the right place. I love this fic specifically for the care and detail of the case. Even more, there are lots and lots of OCs in this fic and every single one of them has their own personality and backstory. Be warned; there are lots of arguments between the elder Winchester and newly human Castiel. (Most of them because Dean is a big ol idiot in this fic and keeps the possible location of Cas’ fallen grace from him because of his Winchester Fear Of Abandonment ™)

92. Sunset Plaza by @LoveIsNotAVictoryMarch - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Dang! This is a great fic. Cas is practically married to his work and never goes on vacations, so his loving brother Gabriel decides to book him a weekend at a resort. Cas ends up having to share his room with one Dean Winchester the first night due to a problem with the server at the hotel. But they manage to make the best of it (if ya know what I mean...) Everything is great until its time to go home. They could make it work, but our lovable idiots can’t let anything be that easy. (Extra points for a little dash of Sabriel and meddling Gabriel.)

93. Longing by @whelvenwings - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- This is a really fluffy fic set in canonverse. Dean and Cas finally have a discussion that has been long in the making, ending years of mutual pining. The tone of this fic is very sweet and is a great, feel-good, nightime read. Give me Destiel and Impala confessions and I’m one happy clown.

94. Hallelujah! Noel! Be it Heaven or Hell by @EnochianThings - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- Enochian Things is one of my favourite fic writers of all time! I can’t believe its taken me this long to rec this fic. This is an angsty holiday fic in which Cas confesses his feelings first and Dean is a total assbutt about it. Dean is at a loss after he realizes that he might of just driven away the one thing that could have made him the happiest: Cas. (Oh, don’t get me started on a rejected Cas... My heart can’t bear his sultry saraphim sadness.)

95. I’ll Cross the Sky for You by @superhoney - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- I am going to start this off by saying that I wasn’t really into this fic at first. I had found it through tags alone and it sat in my Marked for Later for months. I liked the tags, but I wasn’t sure about the premise of the fic. I could NOT have been more wrong. This fic was absolutey adorable. Barista!Dean meets Captain!Castiel... but in space! (With space ships and everything!) Anyways, very adorable, very cute. Definately worth checking out.

96. Nepeta Cataria* by @thepopeisdope - Archive of Our Own.

Thoughts- I would literally give anything for there to be more Witch!Cas x Familiar!Dean fics out there. This is one of my top five favourite AUs and I feel like it is so lacking compared to many of the others. In this fic, Cas is a lonesome witch who plants catnip to prevent mosquitoes from being in his garden. Little did he know that it would aslo attract Dean, a powerful familiar, who just so happens to be the love of Cas’ life. (Familiar!Dean is almost always a dog in the fics I find so it was great to get to see him as a cat. Honestly, Cat Familar!Dean might be my favourite.)

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I am 21 old male. I passed my driving test 5 months ago and my premium is way too high because I have 3 points on my licence. They were not displaying L plates. I really feel bad because my parents don't drive and I think it would be great to help out with the shooping at least. car insurance is coming up as 3000 and i cant afford. I really want to be there for my parents and drive to work in the early mornings. :( any ideas?

Lying to insurance driving record?

It's time to renew my insurance. In the quote I got in the mail, they didn't include the speeding violation that I got back in July 2009. If I tell them about it it would bring the premium up of about 120 dollars. I'm debating if I should tell them or not. After all it's their job to prepare the quote and check driving records. I'm just afraid that in case something happened they would use this as a reason not to pay eventual claims.. What would you do? Thanks""

Is there a safe and accurate way to search online for auto insurance quotes...?

Don't want to enter social security number or actual home address for that matter. Using age, driving record, general home address (city and state) and of course the required car info...Is there a site that would give you an accurate range of what it would cost to insure a vehicle in NY state? Personal experience is best , but all knowledgeable info would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!""

Am i paying to much for car insurance?

my parents just got insurance for my first car it is a 1963 mercury comet i am 17 years old and my dad just told me the insurance for the car is $380 per month and that seems a little high what do you think? my other friend only pays $100 but he has a good student discount and has had insurance for a while.

Which insurance company is cheapest for young drivers?

im trying to insure a ford ka as my first car and the cheapest quotes im getting is around the 4k mark.. pretty sure i can do better but not sure where..

What is the average cost of health insurance for an infant/family plan?

What is the average cost of health insurance for an infant/family plan?

""NYC Car insurance for 18 year old dude, please help.?""

Ok so heres the deal, I am 18, a guy, living in nyc and looking to buy my first car. Now my parents dont drive so Im on my own for insurance. Now Ive been shopping around to every large company and even small, and the lowest I could get a monthly payment down to was around $371 a month. That is the state minimum coverage with no collision coverage. Its gonna be used whatever I get so I dont need the collision. Now the help I need is if anyone knows any possible way to get anything cheaper, I can deal with something like $200-$250 a month. If anyone has a success story or knows any agents or brokers personally and could help, Id love to know. Now dont tell me I should go on a family member or something, thats not an option. Ive done all the research and been doing quotes 24/7. Now Im a student just trying to get to school and work safely and efficiently. I have a clean license nothing on it. Please and thank you for any help.""

Can you get motorcycle insurance in NY with just a learners permit?

Can you get motorcycle insurance in NY with just a learners permit?

Do I need to have my own insurance to drive a friend's car?

I have my driver's license but don't own a car. Do I need to buy insurance for myself if I want to drive a friend's car, or am I covered under his policy? The car is insured in Florida and I have a Georgia license.""

Do you need insurance on a leased car?

Easy question...do you need insurance on a leased car? I heard that the company you are leasing from takes care of it.

Where can i find a cheap car insurance?

i live in UK from 2011 and i am self employed. i have a very cheap vauxhall and i pay nearly 2000 a year on car insurance. i want to have a second car to be clean and for social use only but i will need to pay an extra 1000 per year. i am 27 years old and have 5 years EU driven licence. can you advise me in any way?

Why does the political left compare obamacare to car insurance?

car insurance is to cover the other guy, people often have liability only which give no personal coverage whatsoever!!! ca""

Is it possible to get insurance for a couple of months for 18 year old?

I passed my test a couple of months ago and really want to drive for summer, but I can't afford a car at the moment. Is it possible to get insurance on my mums car for a couple of months? as I go away to uni in September, possibly as a named driver? thanks.""

""Pizza delivery driver insurance in own car, where can I get insurance uk?

I have been offered a job as a pizza delIvery driver but I need to insure my car with business insurance I have tried everywhere but know one does it please Help x

Will my Geico go up after 6 months?

My Geico is only $62.84 monthly. I have the 6 month plan. I had Allstate before switching to Geico last month. I switched because every 6 months Allstate would go up by $25. I could NOT afford it! So I switched to Geico because it was $125 cheaper monthly. Everyone I've talked to said theres hasnt went up after 6 months. I have no criminal record, no tickets, no felonys no nothing, etc. So I was wondering for all you Geico customers, has Geico been good? Has it went up after 6 months? No arrogant answers, please!""

I'm getting a Suzuki DR200SE and I want to know how much insurance would cost...?

I'm 14 and I'm going to get this bike. It's legal for me to drive off road (trails) but if I wanted to drive on road I would have to get my license (16 months time). The reason I want this bike is because when I am 16 it's 50 miles a gallon, and for a small bike it goes highway speed. I understand that because I'm under 25 that it's going to be a lot and I don't own a credit card so I don't have bad credit. I would just like to know how much per year that it would cost. Because if it's a lot I'm going to buy an old junker that's been sitting in my step dad's driveway for a few years.""

How much is insurance for a 16 year old girl driving a red 1998 corvette convertible?

I am a very responsible driver and I DO NOT speed. I always wanted a corvette and it would really help me out if someone would be able to tell me how much the insurance is. I heard the prices can range really high, but being a student on the high honor roll would that help me out? I am over a 4.0 gpa with honors classes. Btw I live in Illinois. Would it be over $100 dollars a month. I am very confused. please help me..""

most affordable private health insurance

most affordable private health insurance

Why arent car insurance comparison sites easy?

I am really confused how to use the damn things, for example i am trying to find a cheap quote but it keeps on asking when i want the policy to start?? When i do not want it to?? What policy date should i put in if i am just trying to find cheap insurance, not wishing to start it. Help is much appreciated!""

16 year old male car insurance?

I am currently 15 and going to be 16 and getting my license . I am going to be driving a 1997 chevrolet corvette. Ik this is going to be exspensive but my parents are going to help alot. I was wondering about how much i would be paying?

Cheap Cars for cheap insurace??????????

I am 18 a new driver and i am looking for a used car with a budget from 400 to 600 iam trying to find a car with a cheap insurance and are Diesel cars cheaper to insure????

California health insurance?

I am looking to get health insurance for a year, more to take care of neglected issues than to cover my butt if I get sick/hurt (I'm 27, betting on youth and good health!). Kaiser seems to be the most appealing because they cover a broader range of services. I am namely interested in physical therapy (winged scapula), dermatology (oily skin/acne), perhaps mental illness services as I have suffered from depression (although I somewhat consider it a problem of my past). I'm aware insurance plans won't cover preexisting conditions, but how can they really prove these issues didn't start yesterday, right? I'm overwhelmed with my choices. Is it worth paying $330/mo for $0 deductible, 0% coinsurance, $40 co pays and a max out of pocket @ $3000? Or is it smarter to pay $166/mo, $2700 deductible, 0% coinsurance, $0 co pays after deductible, and max out of pocket @ $5000 (including deductible)? Etc. I have put off getting insurance because I'm scared I will pick a completely inappropriate plan. Can anyone shed some light on this for me?""

Does your Drivers Ed grade effect insurance?

I know that taking Drivers Education can give you a discount on insurance. However, in the class, we take tests and are assigned homework. We need a 65 to pass. If I get a 70 does this effect the discount I could recieve on insurance compared to say a 90 average? State: New York""

Which car's owner will pay more for car insurance?

Car insurance costs more for cars that can accelerate faster than 10 mph per second. Which car's owner will pay more for car insurance? A. A car that accelerates from 0 to 50 mph in 4.5 seconds. B. A car that accelerates from 0 to 40 mph in 5 seconds. C. A car that accelerates from 0 to 70 mph in 9 seconds. D. A car that accelerates from 0 to 70 mph in 8.5 seconds.

Car insurance questions!?!!? HELP! accident!?

Hey, three weeks ago, I got into a car accident and rear ended someone in the front with suv. I had a honda, and the insurance company declared it totaled and they are going to pay around 9k for the car. Since it was rear-end accident, insurance company held me for 100% at fault. The suv had broken/dented bumper and lower part of trunk lid dented (No broken lights or anything). I would say around few thousand dollars worth of damage. There were 3 people in the car and at the time they said they are all ok, and drove off. No police report was filed. When I called at night to get one of the guy's birthday, he said all three went to emergency, and had whiplash pain in neck area (which is understandable from rear-end accident). I had full coverage so I know my insurance comp. would pay their bills. The thing I am scared about is what if they sue me? I am from low-class family and a full time student on loans so I have no money or even a job. If they do, how much can they sue me for?""

Will my Car Insurance rates go up for 1 speeding ticket?

I just got a speeding ticket this morning (66mph in a 50). I have a really good record. Will my insurance go up? I have State Farm in Ohio. Thanks!

Geico or Progressive Car Insurance?

I live in Chicago, IL. Which company offers better car insurance?""

Can you give me an estimate of how much car insurance would be.......?

lets say a guy under 30 in california with a 2002 BMW 325i sedan how much would insurance be?

How much would my insurance be?

I am 16 and I want to get a car. My parents said they would buy me this car I want but I have ot pay for the insurance. We have allstate. The car is a 1999 ford mustang. Yellow Color V-6 Engine Automatic Transmission 141,207 miles on it 2 drive coup""

""At 14 and 16, can my boyfriend and I get health insurance together?

Can we get a plan together for our baby on the way and us? We'd like to pay for it ourselves and we need health insurance for the baby and I.

How much would car insurance cost??????

16 yearold female in north carolina....how much would car insurance be for a pontiac solstice and a jeep grand cheerokee both paid off. give me amounts not wesites'

Does anybody know about the statewide increase of geico auto insurance in connecticut?

I got a hefty 8% increase for my next 6 months' payments. The telephone assistant told me that it was a statewide increase in CT, based on ZIP code. Anyboby knows more about this?""

""Car accident, neither driver has insurance?""

Was in a car accident yesterday. The other driver was completly at fault. He gave me insurance info, but has just informed me he was dropped due to lack of payment or something. I also have no insurance. YES, I KNOW ITS ILLEGAL TO DRIVE WITHOUT INSURANCE. IF THATS ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY MOVE PAST MY QUESTION!! What am I suppose to do? Do I need to try and get a lawyer and sue? My car was totalled,my hip is in a lot of pain, so is my bfs shoulder n back. The other driver is fine and had very minimal damage. Im at a loss, any advice would be.greatly appreciated""

Can my car insurance company take action on a DUI without a conviction?

I was stopped for a DUI, but have not yet been convicted since the court process takes forever... Well I would like to buy a new car, and it looks like my insurance company will check my record at that time. I have just checked out my record myself, and it shows that I have had my license suspended for 6 month for DUI, but it does not say that I have been convicted of the DUI. I have reason to believe that the charges will be dropped. Can they raise my rates or drop me at this point? Without a conviction?""

What kind of Life Insurance is out there for the Elderly? 70 years old and up.

I've seen some on TV and for the life of me, I can't remember all of what's out there. So far, there is no life insurance on my husband's mother and he and I are wanting to take out life insurance on her. What kind of life insurance is out there for ppl 70 years and up that does not require a medical background? She has a bad hip, smokes like a turned over train, and she hasn't had a physical in aprox. 15-20 years. And she has no assets of any kind to help with expenses if she should pass unexpectantly. This is why my husband and I feel that it is important that we take out Life Insurance on her. Thank you for your help. :-)""

Is this normal for home insurance?

I have AAA-California home insurance and we had an incident yesterday involving a squirrel and our fire suppression sprinkler lines. AAA says they only cover the damage caused (carpets, sheetrock, moisture, etc.) by the squirrel eating through the lines, but will not cover the cost of repairing the lines. Is this standard for all home insurance, or do I just have a crappy policy?""

Can you get your own insurance when renting a car?

When going to a rental car agency such as Hertz or Avis they strongly 'encourage' you to purchase insurance. Can you get your own insurance that covers you in their cars rather than having to pay the insanely expensive insurance they offer?

Cheapest car insurance I can get? (10 points)?

OK I know car insurance can depend on a bunch of diff factors. If I leave something out that may mean major money let me know and I'll do a quick edit. *I'm 17 *Senior in hs *A-B+ average *Had my DL for 3 months *Never been in a wreck *Never received a ticket *Took drivers ed *I have a part time job Again if there's something else I should mention just let me know. My insurance right now is $1000 every six months. It ends this month though, and I'm looking for a new insurance.""

My son's Beretta car is now in his girlfriends name. He wants me to put insurance on it so it can be driven.?

I just want to know what the Michigan law is regarding insuring a car not in my name. And not in my possession. I get a good insurance rate now because I have always paid my bills on time. My sons girlfriend thinks I should do this for them. I don't and I won't but I promised to look into it today. I have two trucks already insured in my name and so does the girlfriend. I plan to speak today with my insurance man to find out what I can. Any suggestions besides being totally blunt with these 40 year old people? Just say no is a good policy and the right thing for me to do. But hard.

Are there deals in car insurance if someone parents are divorced?

and he/she technically only lives with one parent?

""On, average what would a classic mini's insurance cost be.?""

In the UK for a first time, 18 year old driver, car would be left on a drive in a low crime area""

Buying new car; 1 day insurance?

I am going to look at a car soon, with intentions of making it into a winter project. It is drivable, but I do not plan on driving it until summer. I would rather not tow it home, but without insurance I dont want to drive it. Is such a thing as 1 day insurance an option, just to get it home? If so, how much does this usually cost? If not, are there any other possibilities besides a tow? State of Pennsylvania by the way.""

How much is insurance for a 17 year old in NY???

I'm thinking on getting a honda prelude 98-2001.

most affordable private health insurance

most affordable private health insurance

Term life insurance policies?

if i buy a term life insurance policy and three month later i die, will my family get the money?""

Cheap car/insurance for a young lad?

18 year old son has just passed his test. Looked at a Fiat siacento(I know thats wrong but you know what car I mean)1999/1100cc/65000miles/good nick/500,I thought bargain. Until I checked the insurance.... 3000!!! Before I start ranting about the cost of insuring a young lad(and the cost of my own insurance) can anyone tell me a cheap car that is also cheap to insure. Thanks.""

Car accident insurance question?

Last week someone backed up into my bumper while my car was parked. They were very nice and left a note, and we were in the middle of sorting things out. I got an estimate for the damage, but we had not yet done anything with their insurance company yet. Today my boyfriend was driving my car, and he spun out and totaled the car. His insurance should be able to cover it, but how should I go about for the insurance with the first person? Do I need to tell them about the accident or is it not necessary? We haven't yet filed the insurance and so I don't know if it will be a problem. Any help is appreciated.. thanks""

How much would my insurance cost with 5 point on ds?

How much would my insurance cost with 5 point on ds?

I'm looking for affordable auto insurance...?

I am looking for an affordable auto insurance in New Jersey. Does anyone have any ideas. And is it true that a Broker is a good option? What would be a reasonable rate for just a PIP and a older car? I have no accidents or tickets.

What effect will Obamacare have on U.S. per capita health insurance costs? . [SEE BELOW]?

What effect will Obamacare have on U.S. per capita health insurance costs? Note that my question is per capita -- If you take the total payments toward health insurance in the U.S., and divide by the total number of people covered by health insurance... How has that average per capita cost of health insurance changed in the past five or ten years, and how is it likely to change over the next 5 or 10 years? thanks for your answers""

What is the best car insurance that you don't have to pay much in any state?

I live in NJ and paying half as my car cost...

What is cheap car insurance for a new driver?

I am a new driver and I need insurance for a Jeep Grand Cherokee 2000. I am a student and I need cheap insurance

Insurance problems?

hi were looking at buying a new car we have full comp insurance on our car and are covered to drive any car the car were looking at has mot and tax vut no insurance as we checked with the mib web site, can we still drive it using our own car insurance for the car we have now or do we need to insure it on it's own we haven't got a new car yet but still looking wanted advice before we got a new car many thanks for any advice and best wishes diane xx""

Best Health Insurance Quote for uk?

Can you Suggest me Good Place where I can get Quote to Life Insurance?

How much has your health insurance gone up in the last year?

Mine just went up 35%. How much has the affordable health care act screwed you so far? And don't tell me it doesn't start until 2014 the insurance companies are raising rates already due to this stinking pile!

How much is motorcycle insurance?

For an 18 year old male with a streetbike, how much would insurance cost. I am just looking for a range because I plan to get a bike in the future and want to be prepared.""

Car insurance for 19 year old on a classic mini?

I am about to buy a classic mini mayfair 998cc car but I cant fins a decent quote. Cheapest is 2700 with Acorn insurance. Other companies have quoted around 4k and even upto 6k. Its just stupid. Anyway, Im turning 19 in february 19th so will be buying then but looks like I need to gold dig if its like this for insurance. Anyone one of you clever clogs know any companies who will take me on ? Tried: Adrian Flux, Elephant, Admiral, Acorn, and a few others. IKUBE says ring back next month as they dont have tariffs in place yet O_o lol! Ive tried googling this and have found no help. Preferably classic insurance for 19 year olds. Thank a bunch..""

What Auto insurance is more affordable and dependable?

nation wide..

Do u HAVE to have insurance?

i rather pay out of pocket anyways than fool with insurance.

About how much a month does a first time teen driver in Northern VA pay for car insurance?

What is a reasonable figure?

How to get a cheaper insurance premium?

In the UK am i able to put down a much lower value than the actual value of my car just so that i can get a lower insurance premium? Given my situation i would much rather pay for a new car if i crashed or pay for repairs myself if anything went wrong.

How much should aircraft rental insurance cost for an average small plane?

Just doing some budgeting / planning and wondering what rental insurance runs on small planes? Also, should I get that during my flight training or just once I'm out on my own? The FBO insurance only covers their own planes, not a multi-million dollar jet you bump into as far as I know. I would most likely be renting a Piper Archer II from the 70s, probably a $80,000 plane.""

How much would my insurance be?

ive just turned 16 and im getting a 50cc moped restricted. Most people insurance is 289 for the first year and 189 for the second. but thats for a scooter.I want an Rs50 (1 of a kind) and so i am asking, will my insurance be different or the same?""

Broke my contract phone and have no insurance?

Basically, entirely my own fault... i have no insurance on my phone (had it for three months) and it was smashed yesterday! But my question is, if i phone up vodafone and tell them i will PAY three months worth of insurance, backdate it back to the three months i have had this phone, can I then claim for a replacement? Technically I will still be paying for insurance and they will be getting money? Is this possible??""

Need's a ballpark guess on what our car insurace would be?

i'm 19 and my boyfriend is 18 and we want to get a car together but we're trying to figure out how much car insurance would be for the 2 of us with a dodge neon sxt 2005 any ideas?

How can i get affordable car insurance for myself?

i have really struggled to find my own car insurance, i am 18 years old, i have taken pass plus, at the moment i am on my mums insurance, i do have a part time job, do you have any suggestions or ideas for affordable car insurance for someone of my age?""

WHATS THE CHEAPEST CAR INSURANCE?

I AM TRYING TO GET A QUOTE FOR MY CAR INSURANCE AND THERE ALL LIKE 1000-2000. ITS A SKODA OCTAVIA 1.9 ELEGANCE PD 2006 ESTATE IVE TRIED WEBSITES LIKE GO COMPARE, COMPARE THE MARKET, CONFUSED.COM, DIRECTLINE.COM, LLOYDS TSB ECT ECT. ANY IDEAS WOULD BE MUCH APPRECIATED?""

Cheap Health Insurance In New York State for single adult?

Is there any good but cheap health insurance in new york state not based on income?

Affordable health insurance?

for milwaukee wisconsin?

most affordable private health insurance

most affordable private health insurance

How much would insurance be for a 16 year old in GA?

I'm 16, I own a 2005 Chevrolet Cavalier LS Sport- 2 door, live in Athens, GA, drive less than 7,000 miles annually, drive to and from work and school 5 days a week... haha. I just want to know how much it would be monthly for car insurance on any of the companies. Any help would be appreciated. :)""

1.0 60 ps vw polo se insurance for a 17 year old?

just thinking of an average insurance quote price on the new 2014 model? i havent used comparison websites as they need your driving licence number and i dont have one yet.

I have a Texas Driver license but I'm staying in California for about 6 months?

So I moved to California and I'm only staying for six months because of work. I'm also buying a new car to get around. Because I am only staying for six months, I don't feel the need to change to a California license. Can I still buy car insurance and do everything I else need to do with just a Texas driver license? It doesn't expire till 2014.""

In California what is traffic school for? Will my insurance still increase?

I am 19 and got a speeding ticket 85 in a 65 this is my FIRST ticket. I take full responsibility and am ready to accept my consequences. I am not one to drive like that but I was late that day. I know there is no excuse. Soon I am getting my own insurance under my own name. If I take traffic school besides not getting a point on my license will this also prevent insurance increases. If I go to get my insurance will this ticket affect me even though I took traffic school? I live in California and this is my first ticket I am 19 and male.

Hit and run but the victims car didnt have insurance?

ok so i was in a private parking lot and i accidently scratched another car i left because i was stupid and got scared. the cops came and found me the next day and i got charged with ...show more

Insurance payout after lien paid?

My insurance recently sent my lien-holder, Chase Bank, the agreed amount for my totaled car. I owed about 3k less than what they paid out so am now left wondering when I will receive the difference. Chase received the payment a week ago.""

Americans. What cars do you normally have as your first Cars. As a cheap car with cheap insurance?

I was just wonderng What kind of cars American tennagers ahve for there first Cars I might think of importing one

Who has the best disability insurance?

Hi, I want to find out who has the best disability insurance. I work with my hands a lot doing home rehabs, and after a run-in with a spider bite on my right hand, I figured I need to get some insurance due to the nature of my outside activities. Has anyone purchased a supplemental insurance plan? If yes, did it pay out well? Do you like the company? Thanks!""

What is the cheapest way to insure a first car?

I want a ford ka which luckily I one of the cheapest cars to run and insure for young drivers. Is there anything else I can do (except from the black box as I have 3 siblings I will need to drive around) to make the insurance cheaper? My parents both have quite good jobs and are willing to pay it but they would like to pay 1500 p.a maximum if possible.

""I am 18 years old and have 6 points on my driving license, will my insurance cost go down after a year?

I currently aren't on any insurance policy!

My AAA card says it's expired but my parents are still paying monthly for my car insurance?

My AAA card says: Valid through September 23, 2010. They bought me a new car in July and we are still paying the monthly insurance so why is my card expired? Shouldn't they have sent me a new one?""

What do they test for when getting Life Insurance?

I wanted to get a life insurance policy for my family and myself. They want to take blood and a urine sample. What are they looking for? Drugs, nicotine, disease???? What's the deal?""

""Car from 2003, 17 year old female driver. Car insurance average?""

I'm a B+ student, my car belonged to my dad and is now being given to me. It's a ford focus. I'm 17 and a girl from New York. Can someone please ESTIMATE how much car insurance would be for me? I tried websites but I'd have to put in my social security # to get an average and I don't want to do that yet.""

How much would my car insurance be?(State farm Insurance)?

I'm a teen driver, and ill be 16 years old when i get my license. i'm a 3.0 + gpa or higher student and have had no issues with the law.i drive a 1997 mazda protege with a clean title (idk if that helps) I live in Portland,Oregon Car is 1997""

Cheap car insurance companies in the UK for young males?

Cheap car insurance companies in the UK for young males?

Does anyone know a carr insurance company that quotes and lets you print certificate?

i need a car insurance certificate for wed and my own insurance cant post one in time. does anyone know a web site that quotes and then lets you buy and print off a certificate? not swift cover as they wont insure my car as im only 24! thanks!!

I am looking for Home owners Insurance. Which do you have or recommend?

Geico or State Farm And Why? Thank you

What is the cheapest car insurance company to go with at 16. could someone give me a estimate?

my car is a 2000 Pontiac grand prix. all i need is state minimum.i live in ohio

How do I find Insurance coverage for preexisting conditions in California?

Our March Cobra payment was sent in too late so the coverage was cancelled. I applied on-line for coverage with Blue Shield of California and was denied due to preexisting conditions. Now I have no coverage. I understand I may have a 6 mo. to 1 yr. period where the insurance wont cover any preexisting conditions once Im on a plan, but how do I find a plan that will accept me?""

Insurance?

I am carried under my mothers insurance because I am in college currently and unmarried. I am pregnant though, so when I deliver, will the baby be carried under my mothers insurance also? Capital Blue Cross.""

What happens if you just don't pay your car insurance?

Where I live you get car insured and they put a sticker on the plates with expiry date a year from now. But you still only pay once a month. What happens if you simply stop paying ...show more

Is there a such thing as Cheap online insurance ?

I'm looking for some auto insurance for my car. I can't use the general aare there any sites that offer cheap auto insurance?

Do insurance rates vary on the type or model of car?

Do insurance rates vary on the type or model of car?

Which is the best insurance company for an 18 year old male driver?

Hey, I'm an 18 year old boy (hurdle #1) and live in South-East London (hurdle #2) and I've had my license for a month now (hurdle #3!) and just bought my VW Polo 999cc (999cc!!)..I CANNOT for the life of me find a decent insurance quote I mean i'm in full-time employment but still most of the quotes I've been given are more than half my annual salary! Public transport is NOT an option because of the shifts I've been given..I've tried the young drivers' insurance with people like Co-Op and InsureTheBox but they're not much different to anyone else.. So, if ANYONE has ANY advice/anecdotes they could share, I'd really appreciate it. Thanks in advance (:""

What would be the cheapest auto insurance for me? i am 19 and drive a 1998 camaro z28?

What would be the cheapest auto insurance for me? i am 19 and drive a 1998 camaro z28?

most affordable private health insurance

most affordable private health insurance

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/car-insurance-one-day-drivers-license-test-possible-anthony-hopper/"

[littledonkeyburrito]

My neopets account is old enough to drive

1. Why are you at home? Because it’s 2am and I’m not working tonight 2. This time last year, were you single? Sort of, leaning towards yes

3. What are you listening to? "Big Tings” by Skindred 4. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? Nope 5. Are you a big fan of thunderstorms? Yeah, that’s one thing I missed when I was living in Spain - tropical thunderstorms

6. Is there anyone you would do anything for? Sure 7. When will your next kiss be? Depends if I end up going on that date tomorrow night and how well it goes. Otherwise idk, sometime in the next month probs. 8. Are you satisfied with what you currently have in life? Yeah. I’d rather be living in a different country but I can deal 9. Do people ever think you’re older/younger than you actually are? People usually think I’m younger, like 16. 10. Have you ever liked someone way older than you? Yeah but he liked me too so it worked out fine 11. How many texts are in your inbox? I don’t text except to the work phone. I prefer messenger/whatsapp. 12. Who last left you a wallpost on Facebook? First thing that came up on my page was Patrick who tagged me on a screenshot of when I said “I don’t know anything about politics but I sure am drunk and have opinions”. That counts. 13. Assuming you have various kinds of electronics (phone, camera, iPod, etc.), are you currently charging any of them? Laptop is currently plugged in.  14. How are you wearing your hair today? Messy. Got out of the bath and towel dried it. Didn’t bother combing or styling because I’m going to bed soon. 15. What are you eating/drinking? Chips and Pepsi 16. What will your outfit be today? Was wearing a stripey shirt and jeans earlier. Now in my jimjams 17. When’s the next time you’ll be traveling somewhere (anywhere) and where will you go? Maybe going out on a date tomorrow night. If not, will be hanging with a friend. Maybe at my place, maybe out at some bars. Also working on Sunday night.

18. Do you ever sit indoors and wear sunglasses or a hat? Sometimes wear sunnies inside at work because I’ll be staring out the window the whole time.

19. Are you putting off doing something right now? If so, what is it? Nope. I do what I want.

20. What’s the most daring thing you have ever done? Idk, probably moving to a foreign country on my own and barely knowing the language.

21. Do you like playing video games? If so, what do you usually play? Currently playing Horizon Zero Dawn on PS4. Whenever my PC is working again I’ll eventually finish playing Dragon Age Inquisition.

22. Are you sitting in front of or by a window? What can you see out there? Blinds are closed but all I’d see is the construction site next door.

23. Do you ever dance to the song playing in your head? Sometimes

24. How long have you had an online presence for? I think my first account was on Neopets. I just logged into that old account (god knows how I still remember the password) and the account was made in 2002. So, 16 years ago. Oh my god my neopets account is old enough to drive

25. If you got a chance to go to space, would you? Depends on the situation but yeah probably!

26. What’s something we do every day but they don’t depict in movies? The cleanup after sex. Okay not really every day but still. They always just roll over and go to sleep. Like, bro you still got a condom on your dick, and you’re just gonna sleep like that??

27. Do you enjoy travelling? Definitely

28. Where’s the most beautiful place you’ve been to so far? There are many beautiful places I’ve been to. Although I think I have to give an honourable mention to the High Atlas Mountains in Morocco for being so beautiful that I was actually speechless.

29. What’s something cool about the city/town you live in? River got sharks

30. Is your style feminine, masculine or somewhere in the middle? Masculine side of neutral

31. Do you usually carry a backpack, a shoulder bag or something else? I don’t carry a bag unless I’m at work and then it’s a duffel bag, or I’m travelling then it’s a backpack

32. What smell brings back a memory for you? Woodfires make me think of winter at my grandparents’ house when I was a kid, even though we never had fires there. Also sawdust reminds me of my dad’s workshop

33. When was the last time you went in the car past midnight? Couple of nights ago when I last did a nightshift 34. Who was the last person to message you?  Maggie

35. What did you do today? Played PS4, Maggie came over, went to Dan Murphy’s, watched some Will & Grace, had a bath with a lime coconut bathbomb and now all my skin is lovely and smooth 36. Why did you last laugh really hard? Okay so I bought a pack of tiny squeaky rubber pigs online and I have an ongoing treasure hunt in my apartment with Maggie. We re-hide the ones we find. Anyway, I laughed a lot when she adjusted her position in the beanbag and the piggy under it squeaked 37. Would you be able to name everyone you kissed? Nah, I’ve kissed one or two people I don’t know the name of 38. Where is the last person you kissed? No idea 39. What color shirt are you wearing? Navy blue 40. Did you have a fling this summer but it didn’t really go anywhere? I only had half a summer because I moved back from europe. I slept with an ex a few times. Does that count as a fling? Probably not. 41. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed? About to bang 42. What was the last thing you bought? Bottle of rum and a case of beer 43. Ever kissed anyone with a nipple piercing? I have no idea. Maybe..? 44. What about a lip piercing? I don’t think so 45. Nose piercing? Again, I don’t think so but it’s possible 46. Have you ever kissed someone who had a boyfriend/girlfriend? Lmao yeah made out with both of them  47. Did you like kissing the last person you kissed or the one before that more? The one before 48. Ever made out in a pool? Uhh I don’t think so? 49. When was the last time you went shopping for new clothes? Do you remember what you bought? I bought undies and singlets a couple of days ago. Not as glamorous as you were expecting I’m sure 50. What sort of compliments make you feel the best? An acknowledgement of something I put effort into

51. What would you say to a twenty year old version of yourself? idk she was pretty much already on the right course 52. Name a few things that make you happy? My lil squeaky pigs drinking/hanging out with friends making plans to travel again 53. If you were going camping for a few days (or to a fancy hotel for those that dislike camping), who would you want to bring with you? Friends that would actually enjoy the camping 54. How long have you been living where you are now? Is this somewhere you intend to stay for a while, or is a move in your future? I’ve been in this apartment for 5 months. I’ll renew for a second year so long as they don’t try to bump the rent up too high. After that idk. I want to move overseas again at some point 55. What was the last thing you put away? I put the towel back on the rack 56. When was the last time you were near a large body of water? I was along the river the last shift I had 57. How much time do you spend in your bedroom? Only when I’m sleeping 58. Do you secretly like to go grocery shopping? No, I put it off until I basically have no food

59. Breakfast; yay or nay? I have vegemite on toast before work but if I don’t have a shift I forget to have breakfast 60. What’s the most creepy experience you’ve ever had? Nothing in particular comes to mind 61. Yay, you’re going out on a date! What do you wear? Fuck I hadn’t even thought about that -_- 62. What’s the last movie you saw in theatre? Was it good? It was either Antman or Deadpool 63. On average, how long would you saw your on the computer per week? When my desktop is broken (now) I usually just use my phone. Laptop is pretty slow. 64. Do you like your music loud? No 65. If you had to lose one of your five senses, which would it be? Smell 66. Would you rather have no computer or no cellphone for a week? Computer. 67. What’s you favourite thing to have for dessert? I don’t really eat dessert at home. I just eat whatever I’m in the mood for whenever. I guess sweet stuff I usually go for timtams or a nutella sandwich 68. Do you tend to straighten or curl your hair more? Neither 69. What’s your favourite summer sport? Sitting inside with the AC blasting. 70. Can you dance, or do you just completely fail at it? I cannot dance. 71. Do you get nervous when you’re about to get a haircut? Yes! And I don’t know why 72. Choose one: Hanging out at the beach, or playing some winter sports? SKIING 73. What’s the coolest place that you ever been to? What’d you do there? Oh man I’ve seen some cool shit. The roundhouses in Tulou village in China were rad. Varanasi in India was a weirdly spiritual experience and I am very much not a spiritual person. Ziplining through the jungle in Panama was fun. Sagrada Familia in Barcelona was super cool in the afternoon with the sun coming in through all the yellow/orange windows. And I’m sure I have more to see in the future 74. What’s the earliest time you ever had to wake up? Was it hard for you? I often wake up at crazy times for work so there is no “earliest” because it loops back around to late 75. What radio station do you listen to most? I have 97.3 playing in the car 76. Whenever you take pictures, do they always end up posted on Facebook? The good ones go on instagram

77. You have unlimited money, what do you do with your life? Travel indefinitely. Pay for friends to travel with me. Give away money. Basically just do whatever I want and hope that nobody tries to kill me for my money. 78. What was the last thing you spent under $5 on? Hmm I have no idea. I can’t think of anything recently. According to my bank statement it was the icecreams I bought from Woolies a couple of weeks ago when I was with some friends 79. How many times have you cried in the past week? None, I don’t really cry 80. Have you ever used your cell phone as a light source in the dark? I need it to see if there’s anything in my mailbox. For some reason I always check the post when it’s dark. 81. Is there anything written on the shirt you’re wearing? “Max Rager” it’s the energy drink from iZombie

82. Where were you living in 1997? I think my family and I had just moved to australia 83. How was your first kiss? eh 84. Do you still talk to the person you shared it with? No 85. How long has it been since you showered? I showered this morning and had a bath a couple of hours ago 86. Have you ever dated someone who had kids? Not dated 87. Have you kissed someone 4 or more years older than you? Several 88. How about younger? Not that I’m aware of 89. Were your parents married when you were born? No 90. Are there any candles in the room with you? No, I don’t like candles, they make me anxious 91. Does the last person you kissed have tattoos? No 92. Do you live within 20 miles of where you were born? Nooooo. more like 10,000 miles 93. Has anyone seen you naked in the last week? Nope 94. Where was your current profile picture taken? In a camping ground in southern Spain. I was visiting my dad’s friends