#operation hellsing

[artnijna]

Doodled some Alucards

[secret-sector-antag]

🦇⚔ Dhampir Hunter V ⚔🦇

Intros/Profiles Part 1/?: Our Old Friends

It started as a side-job. Numbuh 6-5000 had heard of other kids in the organization who had a sort of side gig, on top of their KND obligations. Detectives, candy hunters...you name it. With her....let's say "extra footing" in the realm of the supernatural, why not a monster hunter? Besides, she could imagine other kids would pay biiiig chunks of their allowance to help with some sort of spooky shit, why tf not?

Granted, the "hunting" wasn't like in the movies where they often...y'know, terminated. In this case, she treated it as a sort of "public health" sort thing: keeping tabs on potential waves of homework-eating weredogs, nerd zombies, vampires (spank-happy or otherwise), things of that nature- and nipping the epidemic in the bud with the power of her combat skills and, of course, medical knowledge and assistance once her target was back to normal. Of course, there were times were her "targets" weren't of a spooky nature, and they turned into more of a mythical creature hunt, but hey; she did have "hunter" in her name, so...kinda came with the territory, right?

For almost 2 years, Val roamed the nights on patrol for supernatural threats to kid-kind.

Then came her 13th birthday.

With her sector being of a rather...unique...nature, and how much of a help that could be, the organization all but confirmed that, come everyone's respective 13th, they'd be inducted to the TND...of course, under the condition that they don't turn traitor or royally screw up. ...Aaaaand of course, they kept this "all of you get in! :D" tidbit until then. Jerks.

Having not really heard from a couple of the other older operatives of the sector (specifically Ramsay and Candy...but that's because they were on their own mission elsewhere), she assumed that they were decommissioned and had integrated into the confusing, zit-filled world of teenhood...and with her being summoned to Moonbase, the same was about to happen to her, too. But boy, was she wrong. She is informed that her assistance is urgently requested in Schprekenheim (see Op. C.A.K.E.D.-T.H.R.E.E.), according to a letter sent to both her and the higher-ups of Moonbase.

Thing is...the letter is from what appears to be an outside organization, only referred to as S.C.A.R.E.. The letter states that the area is experiencing a surge of incidents involving homework-eating weredogs, some new beast known as a "StrigOwie", and other paranormal sorts of beings involved in anti-kid activity. Having gotten wind of several of the KND's missions (overall, not as a sector proper) in their area, they had put in an inquiry to see if there was anyone that could potentially help them with their, aaaah... "unique" problem.

Although Val had been doing this sort of "monster hunter job" as a side gig. her encounters were relatively few and far between....now being sent into the area that appears to be teeming with them, she needs to keep her wits about her.

...Then there's the whole issue of "dhampir puberty" that starts coming into play- including mood swings, power spikes, this weird, hand-print-like mark that develops on her face (after the first big emotion/power spike)...could she be turning into one of the monsters she's sworn to fight against?

...On a good note, though she is a stranger in a strange land and has no idea what to expect on her assignment, she does have a familiar face/voice that- albeit several hundreds of miles away- is able to bring her up to speed on some things.

Supposedly, the times that she was on "urgent business" were actually prep classes by some of the more tech-y operatives...

While Minerva is stationed at the Sector ANTAG HQ, she can at least be of some help: keeping Val and her temporary teammates up to date on reports...and of course, listening to her girlfriend talk about her day and helping her through your standard " teenage girl" issues.

---------------- *Author's Note: "Danger Level" and "Priority Target Level" are kind of the same thing? Only difference is that "DL" is used mainly for operatives actively out in the field/"active combat", while "PTL" are those who aren't/aid in a different area and spend most of their time NOT in the field.*

[tokoyamisstuff]

Hey there hope you’re doing well just wondering what kind of jobs do you think the characters of hellsing have in a normal life?

Ayoo here's a collection of silly ideas from the Hellsing Discord mostly (and some scraps of my last braincells):

Alucard teaches history and is obsessed with wars specifically. Infodumps about brutal facts a concerningly amount.

Anderson would be either a librarian, a kindergarden teacher every parent feels mildly intimidated by (but the kids love him very much), or a theology professor.

Seras would be a personal trainer or a bodyguard that always gets underestemated until she kicks their butt.

Integra was supposed to inherit her father's business but became a lawyer that specializes in enforcing human rights.

Walter is an undercover agent that works as a butler to unveil Arthur's massive tax fraud.

Pip is a temp worker that's talented with everything but still can't keep a job for two weeks straight because of his attitude.

Maxwell becomes one of those redpill influencers that sells bullshit to his naive followers and makes thirst edits of himself.

Heinkel gives classes for material arts or sports.

Yumie would be a school counselor or a nurse with an open ear for everyone.

Jan and Luke own the club they had in Hellsing Gonzo. Jan ends up in prison often but his brother somehow always bails him out.

The Captain is an ex-soldier with a lot of confirmed kills. Retires to become a dog-walker or work in an animal shelter.

The Major would either be an evil CEO or the leader of a cult-like commune that claims they don't fit into today's society (definetly commits felonies either way).

The Doc would be a chef, a fashion designer, or one of those surgeons with questionable PHD that offers body modification operations in his basement.

Rip writes dark romance novels that sell surprisingly well with the booktok girlies (we all know her Tumblr would be fire).

Zorin is a tattoo artist with a side business on etsy (she scams people by selling fake magic stuff).

Dandy has no job, he literally scams people with gambling and card tricks.

[anysanuniverse]

German in Hellsing Ultimate

Can we please pause for a moment and appreciate the effort they've put into writing so many things in german in Hellsing Ultimate?

Most impressive example:

HAUPTQUARTIER

Zum Aussichtsraum: Durch den Kommunikationsraum durchgehen, letzte Tür auf der rechten Seite

Zum Katapult: Mit dem Aufzug am Ende des Ganges zum 1. Stock

TELEGRAPHENAPPARAT

Zum Waffenlager: Die rechte Treppe heraufgehen, dort im 4. Stock am Ende des Ganges

Zur Arztpraxis: Die rechte Treppe heruntergehen, dort im 2. Stock [über gegen]

(Okay, that last one is a little difficult to understand because I'm not quite sure what they might have meant by the last "über gegen". My first thought was that they could have meant "gegenüber"? But I can't tell you for sure. To make it easier, I will leave this word out for now.)

Translation:

(Note: I am not a native english speaker and I am sometimes very unsure what the best translation is. But I have done my best and please forgive me for any mistakes.)

HEADQUARTERS

To the viewing room: Go through the communication room, last door on the right side

To the catapult: Take the lift at the end of the corridor to the 1st floor

TELEGRAPH MACHINE

To the armoury: Go up the right staircase, there on the 4th floor at the end of the corridor

To the doctor's surgery: Go down the stairs on the right, there on the 2nd floor

Hey did not just give directions to the headquarters and the telegraph machine they even gave directions to the viewing room, the catapult, the armoury and even the doctor's surgery! And all in german. How cool is that? They did a great job!

They didn't do these extra directions in the manga, they only did that for the anime (or at least we can't read it in the manga):

Here are just a few more examples:

Major, Doktor and Captain walking through the corridor.

left: Ausgang (Exit), right: Eingang (Entrance)

Not(fall)ausgang (emergency exit)

Kommandantenzimmer (commander's room)

Seelöwe (sea lion). I know i'm getting off topic but this stupid face of this damn sea lion always gets me. It's so gloriously inappropriate for a military operation that will raze london to the ground and sacrifice countless innocent lives.

German words on the big screen like this:

Hubschrauber (helicopter)

Ein Plan (a plan), Vollendung (completion)

They even wrote the german words for coffee (Kaffee) and milk (Milch) on the Major's coffee mug!

I love all these little details. They make this anime even more special.

[bunniisms]

WALTER. C. DORNEZ HEADCANON DUMP

Blame this headcanon dump on the tremendous support from my friends and my unending obsession with this Old Fart and throwing him down the metaphoric staircases in my brain!

THE C IN HIS NAME ISN'T A MIDDLE NAME. Remind me to talk about it at length later, because it's an entire bullshit that would make this post far, far longer that I've already made it. Instead, the C in Walter's name stands for COURTENAY, the name of the old, old noble family he draws descendants from. Who had historical connections to the art of Vampire Hunting & the Hellsing Family via their connection to the Vatican and support of the late Abraham Van Hellsing.

Walter was the son of a daughter who didn't have the name (or any claim) to pass down beyond her and her late husband's friendship with Arthur Hellsing. As an adult, Walter's reclaimed the title and hyphenated his last name (i.e. Courtenay-Dornez)

TLDR: Walter C. Dornez but the C in his name is a desperate clinging symbol and claim to historic (and almost forgotten) notoriety and a connection to the business he’s attached his whole identity to but never found direct happiness from

WALTER DESCENDS FROM PEERAGE BUT ISN'T DIRECTLY OF ANY IMPORTANCE TO ANY NOBLE FAMILIES

This is sort of canon, but WALTER HAS DEEPLY STAKED HIS SENSE OF IDENTITY AND PERSON-HOOD INTO VAMPIRE-HUNTING and the concept of both his body deteriorating with age, and his gradual sense of being rendered obsolete behind New Operatives and Alucard is the heartbeat in the floorboard driving him to madness. FOR WALTER TO BE BENCHED OR TO BE RETIRED, HE SEES THAT AS THE DEATH OF HIMSELF IN A FAR MORE VISCERAL SENSE

WALTER IS AN OXYMORON OF ARROGANCE AND INSECURITY. Walter struggles with his sense of identity and his place in the world. It's not that he feels useless, but he feels like he has been doomed and damned to forever be third best - unable to move forward - unable to be better, to be wanted by existence (and himself), always envious and wanting for any claim of his own that he can truly sink his teeth into and use as a salve to cover the infected wounds of insecurity that have been with him since he was a child.

HOWEVER, the funny thing with Walter? As much as he feels this way, he is a haughty, arrogant, catty bastard. He views the vast majority of people, human and otherwise, as far, far beneath him, even with his insecurity being what it is. Walter knows he could be MORE, but these other people? It would be a miracle if they even got to his weakest position. Their words have precisely as much weight as the clucking of chickens.

WALTER HIDES THESE TRAITS WITH A JEEVES-LIKE FACADE AND PERSONA OF WARMTH AND HUMILITY. A lot of the time, the Walter seen smiling and bowing, offering his hand and advice, greeting the guests and answering the household's calls with a polite warmth is as superficial as a cardboard mockup - it's an act - the Walter we see walk out and make pot shots to scare Jan and quote his speech back at him. THAT'S THE REAL WALTER. Walter hasn't so much changed that part of him that we saw so much of in Dawn, as much as he's learned to hide it.

ONE OF WALTER'S LOVE LANGUAGES IS TRANSPARENCY. Walter has developed such a false crust of subservience and humility and comically stereotypical butler-like deference. You know you've sunk deeper into his person when he begins lifting the act in more intimate settings. Walter might seem to get sharper and cattier, a little more mean-girl-esc with his judgement and quips, but that's Walter! If you took him for a sweet old man, you bought the charade, hook, and sinker. THIS is the real Walter, THIS is what goes on inside his mind's palace. Either embrace it or take the check and go! Haha

UNLIKE THE HOUSE OF COURTENAY'S CATHOLIC ORIGINS, WALTER IS ANGLICAN and sparsely practicing, making sure to attend major Church Functions alongside the Household (such as Integra) but not making much of a habit of attending the small chapel inside the Hellsing Estate

WALTER HAS FOURTH NERVE PALSY, caused during The Dawn Arc after he sustained a massive skull fracture and very nearly died

YES, HE DOES BLAME ALUCARD FOR THE INCIDENT THAT CAUSED THIS, they were assigned to a mission together, flushing out operatives in Warsaw together, and yet, they became separated. Alucard's bloodlust or showboating slowed him down, and Walter was left alone to fend on his own. While successful for a while, Walter was a child, a lone child, and his enemies had no mercy. By the time Alucard dragged his carcass back to Hellsing, there was little to be done. But, despite rescuing him after, Walter never forgave Alucard for the part he feels Alucard played. His blame is partially misplaced, but it still burns hot, and the paranoia festering in the back of his mind forever wonders whether it was delayed by accident or if he orchestrated it all to stunt his abilities and prevent him from surpassing Alucard? (it's absolutely NOT that Walter, I can promise you)

WALTER HAS A SMALL HABIT OF ALWAYS LEANING/COCKING HIS HEAD SLIGHTLY TO THE RIGHT SIDE TO COMPENSATE FOR THE DAMAGE TO HIS EYE AND VISION

RE: THE MONOCLE, it's not there for the aesthetics of a Victorian nobleman, though that's not to say Walter doesn't carefully cultivate his image. Walter's monocle is a prescription medical device; it helps correct issues with his depth perception and acquired short-sightedness caused by his palsy (especially with reading). Additionally, it's been a wonder how ptosis symptoms in his right eye that've stemmed from the palsy have been eased with the monocle supporting that side of his face.

WALTER ALSO HAS PERIPHERAL HYPER-MOBILITY SPECTRUM DISORDER most notably impacting his hands, wrists and fingers, but more broadly affecting his ankles and feet too. In recent years, Walter's found that the symptoms have been worsening and spread to his knees, too, but he's never spoken openly about this and resents it greatly. The records from Hellsing-pocket Doctors making note of the degeneration of his condition have always been burned, almost as though destroying them could silence the truth in some way.

THE PURPOSE OF THE GLOVES, while Butlers wearing gloves is a tale as old as time, Walter wears them not to uphold old traditions of cleanliness and not smudging things - but rather to hide the slight but noticeable gaps at the center of each of his fingertips where he ejects the monofilament from, which is unfortunately essential when facing the public. He removes them the second he gets behind closed doors and happily does that.

WALTER HAS A COMPLICATED RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS DISABILITIES, BUT THEN AGAIN, HE HAS A COMPLICATED RELATIONSHIP WITH EVERYTHING

WALTER RE: THE WIRES AND THEIR IMPACT ON HIS BODY, the designs of the Late Hellsing and Seward, while innovative, were... imperfect. Flawed even. Walter REFUSES to come to terms with it, but the wires, despite their impeccable qualities, have been degrading his body MORE than gradually. They are the single leading reason for his Hyper-Mobility Spectrum Disorder; they have been EATING at the cartilage and connective tissue in his limbs and making his gradual decline far quicker than had ever been previously believed.

WALTER GOT HIS WIRES IN AN OPERATION AT TEN. It was a deeply invasive affair that left Walter bedridden for months. Directed by Seward and Hellsing loyalists and conducted by the last design of the Late Abraham Van Hellsing and his mentee Seward. WALTER CONSENTED AT THE TIME, IN FACT, HE WAS EAGER ABOUT IT AND THE PROMISE. Walter wanted the prestige, the power, to feel purpose and drive and to have something that was his, that defined him, and the miserable life he'd been gifted that was always at the mouth of the river, leaving him looking up at the source and the promise he had been born outside of and dreaming. HOWEVER, IT WAS STILL SKETCHY AF AFFAIR, AND AS THE WORD OF GOD, IT WAS, WITHOUT A DOUBT, AN INCIDENT OF ADULTS EXPLOITING THE LACK OF KNOWLEDGE, INNOCENCE AND EAGERNESS OF A CHILD FOR PERSONAL BENEFIT.

WALTER'S LOVE LANGUAGE IS QUALITY TIME. Walter, while a womanizer, is no adept man in the art of romance - some would call him a tad clumsy, but that's not it, nor would it be right to call him cold or unromantic. Walter is simply... atypical. He doesn't enjoy grand gestures of romance or constant touch - Walter is a man of boundary, and his ideal form of love is the quiet, cat-like sort of co-existing in joy. Can he perform his duties and passions and look over to see someone he is fond of simply existing - caught in their natural environment and at peace WITH him? That's ideal for him.

WALTER IS A SOMMELIER. Read as Wine Snob, not only for his job, but he just really enjoys wine!

WALTER AND BEING A BACHELOR IS A DELIBERATE CHOICE. He's had proposals passed onto him, and thrice, he's declined. He's had his girls and boys, but never committed even to the point of being considered lovers. Walter is simply most at ease on his lonesome, and though it might seem lonesome at the surface, it's ideal for his line of work and his love style.

HE ALSO IS ALLERGIC TO DEEP COMMITMENT BUT SHHHH

WALTER DOES A LOT OF WORK AND TAKES A LOT OF PRIDE IN KEEPING HIS APPEARANCE. Sorry, I KNOW this man wears expensive colognes that he has organized for the seasons, has all his suits and tail coats properly fitted and has a skincare routine. He IS the type, and I love that for him. His toiletry cabinet is more stuffed with product than either Integra or Seras' COMBINED! He will not leave his room until his hair is slicked back and he smells like sandalwood ON GOD.

THOUGH THAT BEING SAID, HE IS LONELY IN THE SENSE THAT HE FEELS DEEPLY ALONE WITHOUT PEERS; he simply doesn't see most other people, most other creatures, as on his level. In that, and his arrogance, he is deeply alone, but it's a cage of his own creation.

HE LOVES INTEGRA LIKE A DAUGHTER, AND I REFUSE TO SEE IT ANY OTHER WAY; he helped raise that girl - a constant, familiar face in the background of her youngest years. He watched her be born in the house, he was one of the first that held her - she was one of few she gave a big smile to as a baby (she was one of few things that ever made him reconsider his decision to never want children), she watched her walk, then run and grow into a girl and then a confident young woman. And when it comes to the betrayal :,)

I could make an ENTIRE post detailing my thoughts about it and how I portray it, but Walter had been turned into a Freak a long, long time ago, and by the time he met Integra (as in, she was born), he was too far gone to be saved, and he knew it. There was a gun to the back of his head - he had the chip, and he could be toast at any moment; he... well, he selfishly did what he needed to do to survive. Sometimes, the awful truth is that both things can co-exist, and a person can be caught between love and survival and still choose survival, even after everything.

I'm 10000% on copium with this. Still, I feel his whole Ebony Darkness Dementia speech to Integra was to VILLAINIZE HIM AND HIS MEMORY IN HER MIND - he spent DECADES selfishly loving her and raising her, and he knows she returned those feelings. They never spoke about it, but he KNEW. She'd ask him his opinions (even when he, as a servant, wasn't entitled to those against the word of his lord), request him to have dinner upstairs with her and attend church functions alongside him, even when she was a grown woman. He was one of the most consistent fatherly figures she had. He became that for her, but he doesn't want her to spend any years agonizing or grieving over another dead father. Telling her he's a mustache-twirling evil that has always plotted her downfall is another selfish lie. Still, he hopes and needs to believe that maybe, maybe, that'll make it easier on her heart to cope with the rug-pull, his defection (and death) and losing yet another dad.

WALTER IS INTEGRA'S MOST ADAMENT APOLOGIST AND DEFENDER; this is another truth of mine I will take to the grave, and Hirano can fight me. It's not Walter's place as a servant to feel that level of protection over his master - even given his place, having watched her grow. Still, something alien takes over his sensibilities when he hears people speak against her brazenly, and he'll stamp it out in his own petty way. He's her dad, your honour!

[ryunumber]

Alucard (Hellsing) has a Ryu number of at most 2. Alucard is an operator voice in Call of Duty: Modern Warfare II (remake) and III (remake). Multiple The Walking Dead characters are also in COD as operator voices or guest characters, and from there it's a link through brawlhalla.

If you wanted to mosey around a bit, you could link alucard to the non-negan TWD voices in CoD, to Negan, to Tekken, to SFxT

Limited, but regardless, thank you for the submission!

[east-side-militia]

hellsing if millennium got involved with operation paperclip

[muraenide]

I'll probably add more verses for Jade. I'm in the mood to write him in so many different settings lmao. Hmu if you want to plot in any of these 🙂‍↕️🥰🤗💖

⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️

Cyberpunk Post-Apocalypse

Takes place in a rundown world after human inventions destroyed earth and humanity is just beginning to pick up the pieces and rebuild. The world runs almost entirely on robots. Few humans are fully organic. Most have at least a part or two swapped for a mechanical part. Jade is an unconventional 'illegal surgeon' who helps people swap/equip these parts for a price.

Starfighter AU

Earth is involved in an intergalactic war. A certain group of volunteers were sent into space to fight these battles. Each ship consists of one Fighter and one Navigator. A Fighter operates the guns on a spacecraft and the Navigator is in charge of strategy and navigation. Jade is a Fighter-turned-Navigator, depending on the timeline of the verse he might be Lead Navigator.

Xianxia AU

Jade's a prince of the merpeople tribe, particularly the eel tribe. He's one of many and the title isn't meant to carry much authority. In fact, due to being born with a 'demon bone' which grants him the ability to turn towards the evil path once awakened, he's feared and shunned by most of his people.

Van Hellsing AU

Jade runs his own coven in a mansion up in the hills as a count who had been living for over six centuries. He's the only vampire in the mansion along with a harem of female gargoyles, who frequently abducts humans from nearby villages.

Witcher AU

Jade is a Rusalka who lives at the bottom of the lake. He's part of a much bigger coven who are charged with kidnapping humans from nearby villages and drag them to the bottom of the sea for their 'leader' to be devoured.

[ur-local-cryptid-0]

Walter playlist but i'm strictly going off of vibes (he would NOT listen to these) and i'm also a freak™️

YT link (i don't use spotify sryy)

Tracklist + some much needed explanations under cut! (Disclaimer: Not really aesthetic at all)

Take Me Back To Eden - Sleep Token

Me and the Devil - Soap&Skin

Brutus - The Buttress

Military Fashion Show - And One

Blue Monday - New Order

Summertime - Maurex

The Summoning - Sleep Token

Alkaline - Sleep Token (Have you noticed that i like sleep token??)

Smooth Operator - Sade (I had to...)

Doin' Time - Lana Del Rey (This is where the freakyness begins)

Angel Of Small Death & The Codeine Scene - Hozier

Sister - She Wants Revenge

Judas - Lady Gaga (Again. I had to...)

Heavy Metal Lover - Lady Gaga

Government Hooker - Lady Gaga (... all of these)

Dirty Diana - Michael Jackson

Flesh - Simon Curtis (So look, listen, this song had a deathgrip on me in my vampire phase at like 12, and like you know hellsing and. Walter is turned into a vampire at the end and. You know.)

[ms-scarletwings]

Irken Zim’s 8 biggest fans

For funsies! As we are well aware, this guy has a lot of gut-haters and censurers across the galaxy. Over his long years of life, he’s gained a proud infamy from every corner of the Irken empire, all the way to the fringes beyond, and the number of critics snapping at his heels only grows with every adventure. Whole civilizations sit at their seat’s edge waiting for this invader’s downfall, but what of those who defy all odds, expectations, maybe even logic? Even devils somehow find worshippers, even criminals get fan mail, and even Invader Zim has someone rooting for him within the 4th wall. Weirdly quite a handful of them, actually, let’s recount.

8. Table Headed Service Drone Bob

It’s humorous, how odd circumstance can make for strange advocacy. The show’s universe operates on the rule of funny, and Bob just so happened to be in the right place and time to comedically become the only Irken alive with something to gain from Zim’s success, and so much to lose for his failure. The sheer unfairness of what the Tallest put him through along with Zim serving some hope for a miracle ticket out of his low standing seemed to snap something in him, even if just for an episode. It would make sense for anyone in his position to have a much more dampened love for their society and leaders, to the point where cheering on its greatest enemy would be preferable than another moment of being a doormat. An underdog rooting for an underdog, even if for purely selfish and coincidental reasons.

7. The Judgementia Control brains

Even more deliciously ironic, isn’t it- That Zim’s praise was be sung once from the very bottom rung of Irken society and then again from the highest spike? What better to follow up poor Bobby than another victim of astronomical circumstance, or rather, three victims together? The nutshell recap of “The Trial’s” plot climax spells out the tragedy of, what is basically Irk’s highest court officials, to become he first ever victims of Zim’s malignant code becoming a contagion. They’ve joined the Fanclub, even if against their will, and all the better for Zim this time to have support from such a high place, seeing that it literally saved his hide in this instance.

6. Dib Membrane

Yeah, that’s freaking right. He’s on the list. You think being a hype man and a mortal rival are mutually exclusive? You either haven’t been watching enough DBZ or you haven’t been watching enough Hellsing and should fix that. Anyway, and I’m speaking within the actual canon dynamic of these two… it is very important to Zim that Dib is perceived as a formidable opponent to bluster his own ego, and vise versa. Dib is not in any self-serving position to accept what an actual mess Zim’s operation is, even though he has more evidence of the alien’s horrible tactics, nonsense plans, failures, etc. than anyone else on the planet. Gaz can see Zim for exactly what he is and why fighting him doesn’t have to be this 24/7 urgent priority. Dib refuses to get that because stopping Zim’s pop-up schemes only keeps the score tied for them. They’ve both been at this long enough to get incredibly frustrated with the lack of progression regarding the big picture goals, taking over the world, and exposing a live alien to the world, respectively. I don’t think he has to keep describing this space goblin as some ultra-cunning master of villainy, or GIR as this nefarious minion because that’s what he actually thinks of them, but because if he admits otherwise, that’s not a great reflection of his own merit for the obvious reasons. Just the presentation of another dimension’s version of himself succeeding against Zim before him causes a spiral of self doubt, just as it can bring Zim to a minor panic watching other invaders leaving him in the dust. Dib wants this guy to be a challenge worth the victory lap when he finally gets what he’s been fighting so hard for.

When Zim is getting on some truly idiotic antics, Dib doesn’t actually revel in his disorganized stupidity, but meets it with a baffled or annoyed disappointment. Like me watching a character I thought was super badass suddenly do something that reveals them to just be utterly lame. Too often he almost comes off like he is critiquing Zim’s performance as a villain rather than,, you know, the fact that Zim is a villain in the first place. It more than once has led to accidentally giving the guy new ideas or pointers on how to do his own job better once in a while. If I were in Dib’s place I would under NO circumstances be giving Zim advice or corrections on what he’s doing “badly” when it comes to the invader thing, but, whatever makes you feel cool & smart, you little dork. There’s also the whole “Dib’s hatred for Zim belies his geeky fixation with aliens broadly” angle I’ve mentioned here or there before, and don’t mind to again. Studying/stalking Zim is only partially about defeating him. His curiosity over Irken tech, biology, etc. is still coming from a place of genuine scientific passion, as literally all of us know. And of course, on occasion the two make for unlikely allies against much bigger shared enemies.

5. Minimoose

Oh come on, how much could I even have to say about this moose-weapon? He has two fathers and is fully aware that Zim is one of them. Assuming we all here know about the cute Florpus quote; no need to recap the whole existence of the lil guy.

4. Invader Skoodge

Now this guy… this guy ain’t right. Exactly here, at this (I say with love) loser of an invader, we reach two tipping points when it comes to Zim-affinity. One, the tipping point where Zim ceases to ask for and ceases to appreciate the toadying. Two, the point where I actually kind of struggle to find any rational explanation for the toady’s behavior. Like I’ve tried and I genuinely don’t know how to put together how Skoodge keeps jumping into this position other than ‘it’s that funny’ or some weird familiarity from smeethood factor. All of the invaders know what Zim has done and what he’s capable of. He’s a consistent terrorist of his own kin and defamed as the greatest disgrace to the Empire. The two options for how to feel about Zim as any random Irken soldier are fear, and/or loathing. If Skoodge were just neutral or indifferent of Zim, that’d be pretty freaking odd. But Skoodge interacts with Zim on the level of at least a lukewarm acquaintance, readily even deferring to his command, despite the fact that he nearly dies every single time he does so. He survives miles of being chased by a monster on Hobo-13, he makes it to the finish line, and his first reaction is to let Zim know he’s made it in one piece. He decides to lay low and slack off after getting fired (into the blighted surface of Blorch) and out of the entire universe to choose from, he decides to go hole up at Zim’s place and stay conveniently out of the way for some time. Dude finally shows himself in the unfinished scripts, and it’s to motherfucking help Zim troll around with Dib. I’m up at night wondering what is going on in Skoodge’s head because he’s n o t an idiot. He’s a real invader in all other respects, just as competent and nationalistic as the rest of them. Easily suggestible, yes, but not stupid. There’s basically no way for him to be ignorant of the big lie the Tallest sold Zim, yet he chooses not to utter a peep on the matter. Pity? A bizarre sense of solidarity?? A delusional one sided friendship??? Don’t look at me like I know other than the fact that he’s on our protag’s team, in spirit. The wannabe Irwin to Zim’s Billy, essentially.

3. Keef

So yeah of all things to blow Skoodge’s unhealthy attachment clean out of the water, we stumbled into this freak of a human child. Keef is a loyal compadre to a fault. A huge, creepy fault. Kid was originally supposed to make a return as well, wherein he was no less of a stubborn stalker than already proven once. And extra points for the irrational selflessness. Even while demonstrating an understanding of what Zim did in Dark Harvest, possibly even with the memory of that whole squirrel incident, he still wishes nothing but for the ability to put a smile on his green friend’s face.

2. The Amoeboid Cult

And when none thought that the scary conviction Zim garnered on Earth could be his biggest fans, you find this little ditty in the comics, and it starts turning into an irresponsible god analogy fairly quick. The short recap is that following a crash on a strange planet, the Voot Runner starts leaking fluids that inadvertently spark abiogenesis, which results in the creation of a rapidly evolving race of blob-things. Seizing an opportunity, Zim at first demands their followership, and then shortly after gets fed up with it as he did the previous fanatic on the list. Nonetheless, the cell people continue to reproduce and age thousands of years their time in the span of a couple minutes, never losing that zeal for their unintentional creator, even going so far as to repair the cruiser despite Zim’s rejection of them. Out of what little they gathered about him during his short visit, they correctly learned he’s a destructive god who planned to abandon them as soon as he could. Their last wish as a civilization? For this god to also obliterate them, as final treat. Such was their devotion that it even left Zim himself completely baffled for a moment when its full depth was revealed.

1. GIR

You watch this show, right? Yeah? Henchman and sidekick number one? Chaotic thing this whole fandom can’t decide to perceive as an adoptive child or a talking pet? He may not be as competent in pleasing Zim’s wishes as minimoose, or as focused, but his heart and loyalty are ultimately with their intended master, unconditionally and for as long as this setting has continued.

[tokoyamisstuff]

gn! Reader I some gore I angst I just a short lil' drabble I can be read platonic or romantic

Your betrayal happened slowly.

There was neither that one dramatic moment that revealed your true intentions, nor a complicated scheme reaching it's end. It was merely an accumulation of barely noticeable sabotages and data breaches.

Things were never supposed to end this way.

But Iscariot - no, the face of your whole church - had changed into something unrecognizeable, something so vile and malicious that your conscience couldn't possibly identify with anymore.

Each and everyone of them had long since stopped serving the true faith, let alone the word of your Lord and Savior. Instead they were twisting the religion to fit after their own sick and selfish desires, leaving a trail of suffering and carnage with no regard of the consequences.

Nonetheless, those people were your allies, friends, the closest thing to a family you might ever have. Indirectly harming them was eating you alive, and yet there was no other way to keep them from committing further sin against innocents.

It started with you secretly slipping informations to the enemy, like that one time you informed Sir Integra that the Judas Priest would invade their area in Ireland.

Anderson noticed early that there was a traitor amongst their rows, his methods of finding the leak unnecessary cruel and without method...

...not once he suspected the informant could be you, though.

At some point however you unveiled Maxwell's plans of using the mayhem caused by Millenium to purge England instead of liberating it - and much to your shock the only person you dared confiding in was already well aware.

After confronting Anderson about this insane operation without him showing any hint of hesistance or remorse, you fled and never looked back, seeking refugee at the Hellsing manor.

Even Alucard's new weapon, forged with the sole purpose to destroy the regenerating priest, had been directly built after the top secret files you had stolen for them.

Too late for any regrets now, you were already in far too deep. You always knew that shall you ever meet again, you'd inevitably find yourself at the other end of his bayonet - and you had made peace with that fact.

Everything has led you to this moment of absolution.

You had been separated from what was left of the Hellsing organization, worn out by aimlessly slaughtering yourself through both nazis and crusaders in this neverending war.

Eventually you just had to run into your former brethren - but for the Paladin himself to cross paths with you was an irony of fate only God could understand.

They say every human has a cardinal sin their soul is especially prone to, and for Anderson that sin has always been wrath.

A flash of recognition made his face drop shortly before his whole stance tensed again, expression contorting through several emotions at once.

He was oozing bloodlust from every pore, like water from the little stream near the orphanage you wished to see again so dearly. You had witnessed this state of his so often yet it had always made you feel oddly safe - but then again, it was never directed to you before.

The priest was calm, too calm for the situation at hand, but you knew him better than that: Beneathe the surface he's close to bursting from all the hatred and rage that's been rotting him from the inside like the poison it is.

He mutely, pitilessly raises his weapons as you fall to your knees in sheer exasperation, the cold stones a huge contrast to the otherwise burning city. You want to explain yourself, cling to his coat and beg his forgiveness - but at the same time you knew you had no right to.

So you decided to gift him one last, heartbroken smile before lowering your head in defeat, voice only a breathless whisper as you apologized for having caused him such trouble and pain.

You wince as you sense the momentum of his blade, but much to your surprise the blow failed to deliver. No, that wasn't right either. It hit the target it was meant to - right into the visage of a SS soldier that had lunged at you from behind, splitting his skull in two.

Anderson's judging stare never left yours as he pulled the weapon from the bloodied carcass, wiping the steel clean on his cassock. For a moment he just stands there, gears in his head visibly turning before he wrings out a shuddered exhale, shaking his head.

He walks past your frozen, trembling self until he turns around one last time, eyes softening ever so slightly. You see his mouth open and close several times in an attempt to vocalize what he had bottled up ever since you left - but even after all that happened, the fact that he missed you so excruciatingly much outweighted anything else.

Ultimately, he feels sorry for having driven you to do this, and even though he cannot forgive you he understands. Yet all he could bring himself to say is:

"Get out of my sight, apostate. Go save yourself."

[casullcasket]

Hellsing OC Masterpost

(Sorry if this post makes zero sense..)

The general premise:

The Doctor was actually somewhat successful in his endeavors (aka, some things do survive the fire Walter starts, just not all); through some sort of fireproof safe or capsule that had kinda the bare minimum of the information of what they were doing.

Flash forward many years later, some individual (name still undecided) knows about the US Cabinet being attacked by vampires instead of just normal terrorists (most likely through witnessing) and goes into a deep dive, pretty much just locking themselves in a room and obsessing for years over ever nitty-gritty detail they possibly can get their hands on to learn more about Millenium.

This individual becomes extremely good at hacking and eventually starts getting into US and UK government files, finding out the existence of Hellsing, Morris Co, the London Attacks. (Which, we know some files of these do exist, as we see Penwood Ill studying them before sparring Integra at the end of ultimate)

Eventually in their search, they find The Doctor's notes on creating artificial vampires, and their plan to create a weapon as powerful as Alucard. They feel this is exactly what they were looking for, and decides to try to recreate millennium's work.

They recruit people using the internet (think like, the riddler from the 2022 Batman movie) and effective create their own terrorist organization. At some point, they download their consciousness to a computer in an attempt to become untouchable. They believe that that vampires are superior to humans in every way, and want to take over the world to create a society where vampires reign and humans are just livestock.

By the year 2031 (so pretty soon after Alucard comes back), they are slowly being found out, as missing people from the US are unexplainably showing up in Britain as ghouls/vampires (and vice versa, but not explained until later).

Hellsing decides to go to America to investigate, Quickly Gets Figured Out by the Air Traffic Control because it is no longer the 90s and air traffic is much more strict now.

Since Hellsing works under the British crown, Integra is told Hellsing is able to investigate in the states under one condition: they work alongside America's own vampire hunting operation: Morris Co.

(The characters of Morris Co are meant to be ‘mirrors’ of those in the Hellsing organization.)

Morris Co:

(Since Quincey Morris was shown being dead at one point; I basically just added in ‘he left behind a son’ and made Quincey Morris a widower (which is why he proposed to Lucy))

Morris Co is a very similar organization to Hellsing, dealing with any supernatural threats that threaten the US. It was founded by Quincey Morris, and gained a reputation after he captured and sealed away ‘The Headless Horseman.’ After Quincey’s death assisting Abraham Van Hellsing in capturing Dracula, his son, James Morris, took over the company.

Inspired by the the Hellsing Organization’s idea of using Count Dracula (Alucard) as their own personal weapon, James decides to unseal the monster his father had captured for the same purpose. He coins the name ‘Bishop,’ which the horseman uses from then on.

The present-day head of Morris Co is Elizabeth Morris, the granddaughter of Quincey Morris. The organization works closely with the CIA, and receives large sums of money from the government.

Elizabeth Morris:

As stated before, Elizabeth Morris is the head of Morris Co as Quincey Morris’s ancestor.

Unlike Integra, she keeps a much more hospitable and ‘professional’ attitude, similar to talking to someone in an office setting.

Her position as a leader is completely influenced by her father, as she blindly does everything in a way that she thinks he will approve of rather than her own opinion. Her father is willing to put her men and civilians lives in danger for the sake of protecting Morris Co’s reputation and continue receiving government funding, and in turn so is she. Slowly over time it would become apparent that she isn't truly passionate for the cause, but rather she fulfills the role her father set for her because she feels like she has to.

She serves as Integra's mirror as someone with questionable authority and blind devotion to her father, which contrasts Integra's strong leadership and independence.

Bishop:

Bishop is Morris Co’s ‘Trump Card,’ a willpower vampire that once roamed the west under the title of ‘The Headless Horseman.’ (More notes on how that works in the pic)

Bishop’s backstory follows a similar story to the story of the Headless Horseman, an American Revolutionary War soldier gets his head blown off by a canon in the battlefield. However, all the blood flows to him and he becomes a Willpower Vampire, and his head regenerates ‘wrong’ (like Seras’s arm). He spends many years wandering around the US as an undead legend before being defeated by Quincey Morris. He is sealed away in a locked coffin for many years before James Morris unsealed him.

He can take the head of a dead human and ‘posses’ it, to which the human’s features will contort to his own. However, the hair will always be white no matter what form he takes (like he had gotten marie-antoinette syndrome). This is why he’s seen with a perfectly normal head with a ‘seam’ at the neck.

He is under a much tighter leash than Seras and Alucard are: he does not talk back or push buttons, (in fact he doesn’t speak unless spoken to) he and Elizabeth only talk to each other in a very professional manner, and he is sealed away in a casket locked from the outside unless he is needed for something. Bishop lives at the base 24/7, while Elizabeth has a true house near it.

His treatment is made to remind Alucard of how he was most likely treated by Abraham and/or Arthur. He is Alucard’s mirror as a character at war with his own desires for blood whose humanity slowly starts to show in small ways similar to what we see in Alucard in Ultimate; though his worldview are very 'similar but opposite’ to Alucard’s as they are mainly based around humanity’s greed rather than it’s struggle for power. He'd mainly serve as a way to push Alucard to directly question his old self post time-skip.

[bunniisms]

VERY BELATED BASIC ABOUT FOR MY HELLSING OC

Okay-- so, her name WAS 神野 睦美 / Kamino Mutsumi. (b. 1890 - d. 1939) Still, presently, she has reinvented herself under the name Amity De Clare after she was assassinated and effectively driven (along with her family and her supporters) from Japan pre-declaration of WW2 (c. 1940 - present day)

Physically, her form is frozen in time at 49 years old (despite the jokes that she doesn't look a day over 30), a preserved artifact courtesy of a part of her mind forever trapped at her moment of death. But presently, she's 109 years old, whereas the collective consciousness that she presently leads is around 430 years old. (more on that later)

Amity is a modified Jorōgumo based on EXTENSIVE original lore and toying around with the concept of what the Jorōgumo represents.

To imagine Amity, without any prior knowledge of what a Jorōgumo is, the best comparison I can draw would be to the Dimitrescu Daughters, if you're familiar with them. The Dimitrescu Daughters and Amity aren't apples to apples; Amity has a lot of different rules and little freaky things that tie into Jorōgumo folklore- but ostensibly, they're a good way to understand her nature. She's a vast swarm of insects that can assume the form of a human woman and shapeshift between murderous insects and humans at will.

-

WHO IS AMITY? Amity is an exiled clan matriarch and former member of the Japanese nobility. Before the events of Hellsing, she existed, dancing along the margins of humanity, travelling from place to place from their former home of Japan, to South America. Training her people to defend themselves and protect each other in the meantime, but never settling for longer than a year to ensure that she and her remaining clan could live without fear of the violent retribution and social repression that killed her and crippled the family 50 some years earlier.

In the meantime, time passed, and Amity, timeless, watched her family and old friends grow and age- fall in love, children be born, and others die with weariness, knowing that her arrangement wouldn't be sufficient for them indefinitely. Her sister, close in age and the last of her immediate family, entering her end of life was the final straw, though. For 50+ years, she had dragged her and the others around fruitlessly without homes, dodging oppression and violence. In turn, never find peace. Foolish as that sounded in retrospect.

Come the word of needing to palliate her sister and say her final goodbyes. Amity gathered her resolve and humility and contacted the Hellsing Organization abroad. It was a tenuous affair, forming a line of communication, making agreements and proving her legitimacy while dancing around the possibility of having The Dog unleashed on her. But eventually, both sides reached a mutually beneficial conclusion.

Amity joined forces with the Hellsing Organization. Through their connection to the crown, they would provide her clan with a more concrete base of stability (i.e homes and land). Still, through the process, they would leave Amity's employ and join the militia of Integra's trained forces (as opposed to all running under the banner of the Kamino Clan and Amity exclusively). Amity would effectively allow herself to become a tool at the Hellsing disposal, recede from the outside world at large and take on an invisible persona of quibus-deficientibus to all but that handful approved to know of her existence and who already knew.

But these massive changes and this settling for the best would not go through before the passing of her sister had come to be. Ending that era of Amity and her clan's past with grief and marking a new one.

Now, Amity is limited in her capacity; she's formidable, but not the strongest fighter when compared to operatives like Seras or Alucard, (troubles of her nature being more catered to violence at one of two victims at a time, and her nature being more of a resource drain to maintain and regenerate), and thus serves Hellsing in a more subtle, non-combative role focused on information and infiltration, which is designed to play to her Jorōgumo nature, becoming their (very literal) fly on the wall giving them an easy, unnoticeable eye into all the underbellies they can't exactly send a human to investigate, lest they meet the fate of that one informant in Gonzo.

You name it, and Amity has probably sent part of her mind to investigate it - from the far sides of the earth, Christchurch to Iqaluit, churches to Covens, clubs and speak-easy and criminal underbellies. It's her trade to listen and observe - and she does with understated ease. Earning her a variety of monikers within Hellsing and among those that have learned of the Jorogumo's sting: from 'The Spider-Whore' to 'She-of-a-thousand-eyes', but none have quite stuck like 'Lady Pestilence,'

-

[dont-need-one-of-these-do-i]

Hellsing Anti-Whumptober Prompt 1

(What is this? Look here!)

<< master list || next >>

Integra ducks behind the wall, her chest heaving. She can feel her heart pounding behind her breastbone, pumping oxygenated blood to her extremities, which burn with exertion. She takes a second to catch her breath, waiting until the gun in her hands no longer shakes with the minute jitters of her trembling fingers before sticking her head back out around the brick wall. 

The sun-soaked field is littered with bodies, and even from her position far from the carnage she can see that the majority of the casualties are painted with red, their armor stripped with vermilion. 

Integra tugs her head back behind the wall of the Hellsing mansion and makes a decision. It’s time for her trump card.

“Alucard,” she calls, her voice barely a whisper so as to not be heard by the enemy, “I need you.”

The shadows beside her blink, and if she were any normal thirteen-year-old girl, she would have screamed. But Sir Integra Hellsing is not a normal thirteen-year-old girl, and is unfazed by Alucard, the no-life king, materializing out of the darkness directly next to her. 

The vampire yawns and stretches his arms above his head, which Integra slaps to get him to put them down. “What is it, little master?”

“We are at war. I need your help.”

Alucard looks down at Integra with one eyebrow raised. “Master, you know that I’m not supposed to help you in this.”

“Those were orders given to you by someone other than me, therefore what I ask of you trumps it. Now, help me.”

For a second Integra thinks that Alucard isn’t going to help, that he’s going to betray her and leave her to fend for herself surrounded by enemies. Then he smiles like a feral dog and she knows she’s got him. 

“Very well. There are five enemy combatants directly downhill from your position. A pair of snipers are over there,” the vampire points to a raised platform on the right side of the field, “and another just there.” He gestures again discreetly to a platform on the other side of the field, this one higher up but smaller. “And there are two coming around the back of the house just now.”

Integra turns to look directly at Alucard, her eyes wide. “Why would you not lead with that?!” Her voice is a low hiss, incredulous, and it makes the vampire grin. 

“I can’t give everything to you on a silver platter, now can I?” And with that, the vampire phases through the wall, leaving the young knight to fend off two attackers on her own.

Cursing Alucard out under her breath, Integra checks the paintball gun in her hands. There’s plenty of ammunition left in the chamber, the paint-filled pellets stark blue against the black of the gun, so she readjusts her grip on the handles and flattens herself against the wall, turning her attention to the new threat. 

A tall man in red-accented tactical gear rounds the corner and, luckily for Integra, he doesn’t notice her right away. She manages to get a shot directly to his chest, the small ball exploding into a veritable cloud of blue paint, and he falls dramatically to the ground, throwing his limbs out and making a very exaggerated oomph sound. 

She scoffs at the dramatics, but once he’s on the ground, Integra gets a better look at his face and recognizes Flint Douglas. Internally, Integra preens at having caught one of the Hellsing organization’s special operatives by surprise, but she keeps her face from showing her pride. 

Integra’s not so lucky the second time, as the other soldier saw her companion fall, but the young girl manages to drop low and avoid the spray of red paint-filled pellets that slam into the wall behind her. As she ducks, Integra pulls the trigger, catching the woman in the arm with the first shot, and then in the stomach with the second. Like Flint, she too dramatically falls to the ground, even going as far as to throw the back of her hand against her forehead as she does so. 

Flint is laughing quietly at this point, and when Integra looks at him, he raises a thumbs up to her. “Nice shooting, sir!”

“Thank you,” Integra mumbles curtly, before checking behind her, and running off around the building in the opposite direction that the soldiers had come from. 

The field behind the Hellsing mansion has some wooden obstacles erected in it but remains largely open. Integra watches as two of her teammates—identifiable by the blue tape stuck in stripes on the shoulders of their tactical gear—sneak below the raised platform on her right and ambush the snipers above, but also getting hit in the process. That leaves only one enemy left.

Integra crosses the field as quietly as she can, ducking behind obstacles and running low to the ground. The grass beneath her rain boots is slick with paint, but she keeps her footing. She reaches the box unnoticed and goes around the back to where the platform is open, and the figure inside is unguarded. She presses the butt of the air gun into the meat of her shoulder, stabilizing it as best she can, and lines up the shot. She breathes out and pulls the trigger.

The guard in the box rocks forward as he’s splattered across the back with blue paint, letting out a noise of surprise. He spins around, taking in the sight of his young boss, before laughing and lying down his weapon. 

“Nice work, sir!”

Integra, like before, looks at the ground and smiles. It had taken a lot of coercion to talk her into joining this round of the Hellsing Organization’s trimonthly paintball training game. Still, she’s finding it more enjoyable than she had initially expected. In fact, she—

Integra stumbles to the side, shocked out of her thoughts by the sensation of a small, red pellet slamming into her shoulder. She wheels on her heels, snapping her attention to the shooter.

Walter, head of the Hellsing mansion’s staff, stands there calmly, his paintball gun lowered, and his lips pursed in a nonchalant whistle. His eyes drift pointedly toward the treeline behind her, as though he had nothing to do with the fact that she is now splattered in red paint on one side.

“Walter,” Integra demands. “How dare you?!”

Walter, utterly unbothered, raises a single eyebrow. “I beg your pardon, my lady?”

“You shot me!” she accuses, gesturing indignantly to the smear of red paint staining her sleeve.

“Hmm.” Walter inspects his weapon, his expression one of mild amusement. “So it seems I did.”

Integra scowls, her fists clenching at her sides. “Traitorous behavior from my own staff,” she mutters, her voice dripping with mock dismay. “Unbelievable.”

Walter’s lips twitch, though he fights to keep his face composed. “It is my duty to prepare you for anything, my lady. Even unexpected treachery. Consider it…a lesson in vigilance.”

“I’ll show you vigilance,” Integra hisses under her breath, raising her gun.

Walter steps back, holding up his free hand as if to placate her. “Now, now. Surely we can agree I was acting in your best—”

Integra pulls the trigger. A burst of blue paint splatters across Walter’s chest, interrupting his protest mid-sentence.

Walter looks down at the vivid smear, his mouth twitching into what might have been a smile—if he weren’t so practiced at keeping a straight face. “Touché, my lady,” he says with a small bow.

“Damn right,” Integra says, lowering her gun.

From somewhere nearby, a familiar voice cuts through the air, dripping with amusement. “Very well handled, Master.”

Alucard materializes from the shadows, leaning lazily against a tree trunk. His crimson eyes glint with mischief. “Though I must say, I rather enjoyed watching Walter best you for a moment.”

Integra rounds on the vampire, her glare sharp enough to cut steel. “Care to repeat that, servant?”

“Me?” Alucard places a hand over his heart, feigning innocence. “I wouldn’t dare.”

Walter clears his throat, straightening his vest as if nothing had happened. “Shall I prepare some tea, my lady? A victorious warrior deserves refreshment, after all.”

Integra lets out a long-suffering sigh, pushing a strand of sweat-dampened hair out of her face. “Tea. And a sandwich, please. I’ve earned it.”

“As you wish,” Walter replies with a bow, his paint-splattered vest now a badge of her triumph.

Alucard chuckles as Integra strides back toward the mansion, head held high despite the streak of red paint on her shoulder. “You know,” he muses, falling into step beside her, “for someone so young, you do have a talent for commanding respect. Even if it’s…earned the hard way.”

Integra doesn’t bother looking at him, her tone imperious as ever. “That’s what makes me a Hellsing. Now stop wasting time and get back to work.”

“Yes, master,” Alucard says, his grin widening.

Ahead of them, from inside the manor, Walter watches them through a window with a knowing smile. The paintball game might be over, but it’s clear the real game never stops in the Hellsing household.

Big thank you to @coffin-of-dust for letting me include Flint!

[mephinomaly]

[TL] BIOHAZARD/Prologue

[ This post uses Ois~su ♪ ]

Season: Winter

Time: Early March in the first year of ES’s establishment

Location: In a underground livehouse, one of UNDEAD’s haunts

Keito: (What is that?)

(What the hell is happening…?)

Rei: 『♪~♪~♪』

Kaoru: 『♪♪♪♪♪』

Koga: 『H！E！L！L！』

Adonis: 『S！I！N！G！』

Koga + Adonis: 『We are 『HELLSING』 ...☆』

Keito: I have no idea what’s going on—

HELLSING…? No matter how I look at it, that’s UNDEAD!

Rei: 『♪~♪~♪』

Kaoru: 『♪♪♪♪♪』

Keito: Oi! Listen up!

I know this isn’t a great time but I need to ask you guys something!

Adonis: —Hey. Oogami, Oogami, Hasumi-senpai is in the stage wings making a racket.

I am not sure how our senpais will react to this, so I think we should deal with him before something bad happens.

Koga: Nah, if somethin’ was gonna happen, it woulda happened by now.

Actually, I don’t want this important live t’be interrupted. Guess we’ll have t’see what he wants.

Oi, shitty glasses— Whaddya want?

Can’t you see we’re in the middle of rehearsal?

Keito: Let me make this clear first of all - I have no intention of interrupting your activities. I’m no longer the vice-president of the Student Council so I have no reason to be supervising the activities of problem children like you.

Koga: God, you fuckin’ know how t’waffle on and on. So why are you here if it’s got nothin’ t’do with us? Random person who looks good in glasses, whaddya want, hmmmm?

Keito: Well I don’t see how that’s relevant. We once donned the same costumes and participated in the same activities, and now we share an agency.

And that is precisely why I, as a representative of RhythmLink, have gone out of my way to come ask you this.

Your recent “peculiar activity” has become troublesome for the agency.

Therefore, I’d like to know what’s happening, UNDEAD.

Firstly-, what is “HELLSING”?

Koga: ...

Keito: Why are you keeping quiet, Oogami?

Can’t you explain it to me? After all, as you quite rightly said, you and I are in different units and are complete strangers who–

Adonis: Please wait a moment, Hasumi-senpai. I don’t think Oogami will be able to explain this very well.

Truthfully, we don’t really know what’s going on ourselves—

Koga: Shut it, Adonis. Yer actin’ like a parent who’s watchin’ their kid run their first errand. Stop addin’ unnecessary shit to the conversation.

Adonis: But, Hasumi-senpai will probably be able to offer useful advice—

Koga: Shut up! He fuckin’ said it himself, he ain’t got nothin’ to do with us anymore!

Now you’re actin’ like your our parents and tryna stick your nose in where it doesn’t belong! Stupid shitty glasses.

Keito: That was never my intention… I’m really– no, I mean, I’m worried about you.

I always end up imposing Oogami with heavy burdens that are my own responsibility.

Koga: Oi, don’t apologise! They told me to take it on, and you told me it was a lot anyway!

…Seriously man, don’t worry ‘bout it. HELLSING is just a different name we, UNDEAD, use on stage.

Recently, the hardcore rock image we use on stage versus the stupid silly image we use on like, variety shows is creatin’ a divert… divertent?

Adonis: A divergence?

Koga: Yeah, that! It’s creating a divergence in terms of how we present ourselves, so we thought that we could just use different names whether we’re on stage or doin’ our regular activities!

It’s like those mangas you fuckin’ love so much. They use different names dependin’ on what they’re doin’.

Keito: Umu… I suppose that’s true, as there are mangaka that operate under different pseudonyms based on if they are working on commercial materials or R-18 material.

Though generally, fans can tell from their art style that it is the same person.

Adonis: I don’t know much about manga but. Think of it as a parent company setting up subsidiaries, where each brand markets different things dependent on what activities they engage in.

Our, so to speak, immoral, radical activities will be handled by HELLSING, and our more friendly and palatable activities handled by UNDEAD.

Only what we do and the name has changed, the members remain the same. Me, Oogami, Sakuma-senpai, and Hakaze-senpai.

Keito: So what’s the point in doing all this…?

Koga: Shut uppp, there’s a ton of reasons. I get you’re a producer ‘n all but why’s it any of your business?

Keito: ...

Koga: …It’s whatever, alright?

This is what I wanted. To be honest, the fans are a little confused but everyone else is pretty happy with it.

I feel like I can actually breathe now I’m not bein’ forced t’do stupid varieties shows ‘n shit like that.

So that means it’s a good thing— all of it is.

I said it’s fine so everyone who says otherwise should shaddup!

『♪~♪~♪』

[ ☆ ]

Chapter 1

[lapetitemxrt]

Dance + Drabble (first word that came to mind hope thats ok!)

"Dance? What interest could you have in dance?" Arthur Hellsing was not the most supportive surrogate parent, at least not verbally. Despite his query, he'd already found and hired dance instructors. He just needed to make a point of being a total ass about it. Walter had added the request to Arthurs daily agenda surreptitiously last week and was surprised when his request was honored. Walter, though young, was not perturbed by his words anymore. It was difficult to take the drunkard seriously. He stood at his position, behind and to the side of the man, eyes flickering to Arthur to scan his expression before he answered. "A well rounded education makes for a well rounded gentleman." It was an easy response and not wholly a lie. Walter did want to have an illustrious and thorough skillset, knowing the culture of Hellsing and it's associates. He wanted to be taken seriously. "Dancing isn't exactly an education as I'd quantify it. You sure there isn't someone you'd like to impress?" Walter was only 11 now but Arthur only knew how to relate to anyone when it came to (put gently) romantic partnership. Walter was uninterested, wholly and completely. He had enough of loving anyone, since his sister and parents were gone. Part of his brain turned off when someone even made the suggestion.

"Who is there to impress? I simply want an opportunity to learn something different. My fa-... I've heard that physical learning is just as important as academics."

He realized dance wasn't exactly the most obvious path to an exciting reputation, but his draw to it was practical. He was training to be a Hellsing operative now, and he had some large shoes to fill after the departure of his late father.

Those shoes danced.

They danced ballroom, they did the Charleston, the Foxtrot and the Tango. They danced Jitterbug and swing. They danced with him, with his mother before she died.

And they danced to the tune of his hunt. Danced to the cries of his prey. Something Walter knew little of until somewhat recently, but was wholly consumed in learning about. His father was, had been, the most prolific killer of Vampires that Hellsing had known and the dance was an important part of his own education. It had honed his reflexes and his senses to the point of being a lethal weapon in and of himself.

Arthur snorted, sprinkling ash from the edge of his cigar, and shook his head. "There's always someone to impress, Walter. Lover or Enemy, we always want them to be impressed." Ah. Perhaps Arthur wasn't as clueless as Walter thought. This rendered Walter momentarily speechless. Something stretched between them here, some nameless understanding he didn't want but was ultimately grateful for. "Either way, Sir, I feel dance will enhance my education. I appreciate your generosity with th--" "Not generosity. It's an investment." Arthur always tried to shut him down when he tried to be grateful. Walter knew better, but he smiled and nodded. "Of course, Sir. I think Dinner is nearly done, shall I check the kitchens?"

He got nothing in return but a grunt as Arthur turned his attention to a paper, which he took to mean yes. He left without further speaking, and it was clear the two of them wanted to divest from the underlying current in this conversation. They both missed his father, in whatever context Arthur could have missed him. Walter knew they would often talk and drink after his mothers death but he was sure the hookers he ordered gave him decent enough company, though he supposed not much talking happened then. In any case, Walter would begin his dancing education and pursue it with just as much enthusiasm as he had to the rest of his studies.