#ooooooooh this was fun

[skishie]

Airphone lovers... speak to me of your woes(please im desperate for others)

[teddybeartoji]

i'm in love with vi btw

[snowflakeeel]

Fish game????? Fish game?????

[thanatosaria]

just one look from me, lights out, watch em hit the ground 🗡️

[mt07131]

Would u kiss her. There is a correct answer here.

(Template is by @togepies)

[bastardbvby]

foolish said he wants to try mushrooms at least once in his life oh baby lets chat

[pyrriax]

i'm literally just dropping this song here

[applebunch]

THE RATS ARE GONNA BE AN ACTUAL PLOTLINE!!!!!!!!!!!

[yoon-kooks]

unpopular opinion but I loveeee sneaky links 🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭!! it’s so fun having a fwb but they also ur friend idkkk😵‍💫😵‍💫🤣🤣!! I fuck w my sneaky link hard, I might marry him 🥹!! It’s time to make it official. P&p is VERY different from my life but it’s also similar 😛. Might update you on the status of me and sneaky link!

oooooooh omg YES keep me updated if youre willing to share! haha wait thats cool how theres some similarities with p&p!! sounds like youre living the fwb dream rn🥺🥺 im so jelly but also excited for you!

[burninq]

“i know what kind of crazy i am, and this isn’t that kind of crazy.”

"i thought you enjoyed violence," he says, head cocked to the side as he holds out his arms, displaying his work of art- the charred remains of a man who insulted him with flowers scattered across his body. it was a violent death. you can still see the man's eyes, opened wide with fear, a gasp on his lips. he clearly didn't even have a chance to react to what had happened to him, it happened so fast and so painful . . . he had no choice but to accept his reality for what it was.

Calcifer usually burns his victims to ash. he usually leaves nothing else behind, but today . . . today, he'd chosen a different route. he wanted someone to see his work of art. he wanted to put the man on display, sat center stage for the world to see. he brought Micah here to show him what he'd done, giggling like a madman all the while. he grins then, jumping down from where he'd been perched on the wall, jumping in front of Micah as he wipes his hands down his shirt, as if dusting away the remains of what he'd done.

"i think it's beautiful," he continues, stepping behind Micah, placing his hands on his shoulders as he lowers his voice, directing him towards the wall further from them. there, chained to the wall, was a woman with long blonde hair and mascara running down her face, a gag in her mouth. she looked frightened and, clearly, she'd been crying. "now it's your turn to make something beautiful," he says, procuring a knife as he hands it to him, his eyes watching Micah's every movement. "of course, if you don't kill her, i will. she's a shit mother who beats her kids. she doesn't deserve to live, so one way or another, she's going to die. do you have the stomach to do it ?? will you finally let the monster out ?? i think it's time to play."

@micahsawyer

[gontagokuhara]

thinking abt what comes next in pointy objects as we (somewhat) close in on the thick of things and. i am so fucking excited ARARAARARARAR

[lovefingers]

me researching the history of every city that the people i match with on tinder live in

[revelboo]

Ooooooooh... I usually don't have many thoughts about prowl, just never paid much attention to him, but your posts make it so hard to feel normal about him I think you've awaken something in me, help!!!

He’s pretty fun to write as a jerk

Stand Too Close Pt 3

Prowl x Reader

• Like a sparkling sulking, you’re avoiding him and that’s fine. There’s always reports to work up, his task list a living thing that’s always growing. Except he can’t focus, rereading the same paragraph over and over. It’s the silence, he realizes in frustration. Somehow he’s gotten used to the soft sounds of you wandering about on his desk being a nuisance. Touching things just to annoy him. How did you become white noise that he needs to focus? Shoving up from his desk, he vents. How far could you have gotten?

• Only halfway listening as Bumblebee talks about a potential energon mine to two other Autobots, you lean into Bee’s hand to savor how warm he is. And there’s no angry tension here. Unlike the jerk you’d been stuck with, these guys seem to be friends. Joking and laughing. Occasionally remembering you and asking a question so you’re involved in the conversation. Listening to them, your thoughts turn unwillingly to Prowl. There’s never any other Cybertronians coming to visit him. No one joking with him, because apparently it’s not just xenophobia. He’s just a jerk to everyone and they all avoid him. It should be funny, but it doesn’t quite sit right somehow. Always alone. Always angry. Realizing you feel kind of bad for him only annoys you.

• It’s not like he hadn’t known that temperatures optimal for Cybertronians are too cold for humans. He’d heard Wheeljack mention it to Sideswipe once in passing, the young bot pestering for information on humans. Seeming fascinated when Wheeljack mentions that his will curl against him because he’s always warmer than they are, seeking his body heat constantly. You’ve never willingly came to him, though, and he’d not really thought much of it. Maybe the cold hadn’t bothered you. But thinking about it, he has seen you shivering before. Never complaining about it, just glaring at him whenever you notice him watching you. Cold and unwilling to approach him.

• Apparently, you just hate him more than you want to be warm, because there you are. Bumblebee’s laid his arm on the table, palm cupped slightly as he talks to Hound and Trailbreaker. And you’re sitting in the younger scout’s palm, leaning into his servos and his warmth. It shouldn’t bother him, the dislike is mutual and has been since he accidentally clipped you. He didn’t want to be stuck with you and, as you’re so fond of pointing out, he ruined your life. It shouldn’t bother him. Definitely shouldn’t light through him in a furious wash of what can’t possibly be jealousy. Almost absently, Bumblebee curls a servo to stroke down your arm and you relax further in the grip. Expression relaxed, not angry for once. He’s never seen you like that.

• “Bumblebee.” No, not yet. Groaning at that too familiar voice, you look over at the same time Bumblebee does and there’s Prowl, those optics pure ice as he just stares at you in Bee’s palm. “Thank you for watching over the human,” Prowl growls the words, sounding almost like they’re catching in his throat and he’s definitely mad. Fantastic. Fidgeting, Bumblebee looks almost unsure as Prowl holds out a hand in demand. Like he isn’t sure he should hand you over. Sighing, you grab one of his servos to pull yourself up and walk to the edge of the table waiting to be snatched up too roughly, because you made him come look for you. It’s a surprise when he lays his hand down instead, asking you wordlessly to come to him willingly. His expression is still tight with anger when you glance up before relenting. Maybe he just doesn’t want to yell at you here in front of witnesses.

• He flexes his servos as you climb into his palm and sit down so he can lift you. Eyes on his palm, your little shoulders hunch as he begins to walk. “Well?” You ask, sounding tired. Shifting his palm slowly once he’s out of sight of the others, he cups it and your little frame against his chassis the way he’s seen Wheeljack do. You don’t relax against him, though, slapping a palm against him and pushing at him like you think he’s trying to crush you. You really do hate him. It doesn’t bother him. It doesn’t.

Previous

Next

[stories-and-chaos]

Shrike: Angel Learns a Lesson

[Hazbin Hotel reader insert as Alastor’s “darling life and death partner” I did my best for an ace x ace relationship, based on personal experience. Both parties are moderately sex favorable. Silly one shot inspired by my brain saying ‘what if a Stolas-esque bleep fest was extremely clinical’]

[One shot, 1106 words, no warnings needed]

—————

“Okay toots, you an’ me gotta talk,” Angel Dust found you reading in the hotel parlor. The lanky spider demon had been itching to talk to you one on one since you moved into the hotel. You’d moved into Alastor’s suite, happy to finally have your husband back after his seven year ‘sabbatical.’ That meant you were mostly in the Radio Demon’s company. Angel had learned not to ask him about sex the hard way.

You looked much more approachable. You had the air of a delicate bird. A little shorter than Vaggie, you had the perfect amount of curves for an hourglass figure. The shimmering flapper dress you wore showed that off nicely. Even though your arms and legs were vividly red for ⅔ of their length, they weren’t too alarming. Even your talons looked delicate. The black mask across your eyes was striking but offset by the fluffy silver hair framing your face. Your wings didn’t have a sharpness like a bird of prey and were proportioned more like a songbird.

All in all, you looked sweet, cheerful, and non-threatening.

So on a day that Alastor was out while you remained at the hotel, Angel Dust got the perfect opportunity to get some of the goods about tall, dark, and spooky. “Oh! Angel! What can I help you with?”

“I gotta know sweet cheeks, what do you an’ Al get up to?” You made an inquiring noise as you tilted your head to one side. Even that motion was bird-like. The porn star stared at you, unsure if you were pranking him. But the silence stretched on and he realized you actually didn’t understand. “Wha…how…you…” he didn’t know how to talk about sex with someone who didn’t understand innuendo. “How do you and Smiles have sex?”

That just confused you more. “Angel, ma petite araignée, I thought you worked in the sex industry. Surely you know the mechanics.” You paused. “Though I suppose I wouldn’t put it past that lousy moth to keep you in the dark.”

“I know how banging works! Jeez, I can’t do this sober.” He ordered drinks from a Husk that was trying not to laugh. He drank one, got a refill and brought one back for you as well. “A’right. You and Alastor are both as thick as two short planks about anything sexy, so I wanna know how you guys ever do anything in bed. Besides sleeping,” he hastened to add.

“Ooooooooh, okay! Sure, I don’t mind talking. But you gotta explain all those innuendos we don’t understand, got it cher?”

“You got it toots. Now spill, start with how often you do the deed.”

You sipped your whiskey as you thought back over the last century. “Mm, anywhere from one to four times a year? It varies, but infrequently is a good way to put it.”

“You only have sex once a year?!”

“I didn’t say that. It’s usually just for the night but intercourse occurs more than once when we feel up to it. Multiple times usually,” you clarified with a chuckle.

“Okay, makes sense, ya got me there. So it’s just when you’re both in the mood then?”

“I suppose you could put it that way. It’s an enjoyable activity, just not something we need to do. Or want to do as much as most.”

“A’right, we got the scheduling figured out. I gotta know technique. Positions, toys, he into kinky shit? You into kinky shit?” He leaned on the couch back, thrilled that he got you talking.

“Well [redacted] is our usual position. We’ve tried [beep], [bleep], [what], [why]. Oh and [really?] but that was uncomfortable for Alastor. [redacted] and [redacted] were fun but we were so worn out the next day. I like [beeeeeeeeeeep] to mix things up. I don’t know if they count as kinky but [oh god], [nope], [beepbeep], [thats a thing?], [redacted], [please stop], [srsly], and [wow] are all things we’ve attempted over the years. I like some [bleeping all this] and [this too] personally while he enjoys [hide your eyes], [nope], [double nope]. Oh, I almost forgot [holy shit], we gave that a try before his sabbatical.” Angel and Husk both looked at you in disbelief as your list grew. Then you continued.

“As for toys…[don’t wanna know], [redacted], [dang girl], and [bleepbleepBLEEP] all see some use. I guess [redacted] also counts. We tried [no thanks] but I hated it. We’ve both agreed we never want to try [ew] or [gross]. [How even?] has been fun. Alastor has indulged me with [no more please] a few times. Of course I reciprocate with some [BEEPBLEEP] if he asks. But really it’s mostly [redacted] for us. I’m sure we’re terribly boring compared to what you’ve been up to, ma petite araignée.”

Angel blinked at you in a daze. He held his drink loosely in his hand before downing it in a desperate gulp. Husk was once again pulling his ears down in extreme embarrassment. “I wouldn’t say that toots.”

You brushed his mop of hair from his face. The poor thing looked dazed. “Angel, cher, I think you’ve had enough to drink for tonight. Husk, do you have any water for him?”

“Getting to know the guests my dear?” Alastor manifested from the shadows, making Angel jump and you smile.

“More the other way around darling.”

“So long as everyone is behaving themselves. I wanted to know if you’d like to go out to dinner tonight? I’ve come across a little place that claims to have authentic Cajun cuisine.”

“Mais oui! Although I’m surprised you’re willing to try after what happened to the last restaurant.”

“You cannot dump black pepper into sausage and rice and call it jambalaya. It’s a sin and a disgrace and the place deserved to burn for it.”

“Right you are, Alastor. Am I dressed well enough or shall I go change?” You stood up and twirled for his inspection.

“Hmm, lovely as always my dear.” He held out his arm for you. “Until later chums!”

“We’ll be back! Make sure you get some rest Angel,” you called as Alastor led you out.

Once the two of you were gone, Angel slumped over Husk’s bar. “I didn’t imagine that right? You heard her too, right?”

“Oooh yeah. I kept saying not to ask, but you just had to know.”

“Yeah well I learned my lesson. I’m gonna need another drink after that.”

“Nah, I think Y/N was right about you having enough for now.” Husk pushed a glass of water over to him, garnished with a lemon slice.

“Asshole.” Angel did drink the water though.

A/N: This is absolutely drawn from my being married for 10+ years and still not understanding innuendos. Doesn’t matter how many times we’ve done it, that’s not how I’m wired. I’m going with “you can’t be embarrassed if you don’t care” as to why Shrike is so frank with Angel btw. It’s as embarrassing as picking out her shoes for the day. Also when you’re approaching triple digits in how long you’ve been with a partner, I figure you’ve tried everything under the sun and beyond, purely out of curiosity. My count has roughly 600 instances from 150 evenings over their life- and death-time. Feel free to mad libs her bleeped portions, I honestly only filled in a third of them in my brain, and the canonicity is dubious anyway.

@edgyboi10000 @clearly-awkward @badatpunz @deafsignifcantother @whitewolfsoldat @ch3sire-blu3

[arthur-side]

I did not understand a single thing here

Anyways

DND SBG?!?!?!?!?!?

🎀 SBG / CITY OF MIST: ereighkauh torres-santiago 𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅

behold, my newest City of Mist character-- except there's a twist: she's from a School Bus Graveyard Campaign (˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶) .ᐟ.ᐟ

HEYAAAA !! my friends and i, having read SBG together, is particularly fond of that special webtoon. since we're a dungeons & dragons friend group (i KEEP on mentioning this i'm SORRY i just love them and theyre essentially the catalyst for my creative strike this year but uhm, i'm on another tangent again xD) my wonderful DM friend, mel, said: "hey, what if we did an SBG oneshot?"

buuuut, there was another problem: if we we're gonna do an SBG oneshot, what TTRPG system would we use ?? obviously we can't use the D&D systems .... but there was another ttrpg system we were familiar with that mel introduced us to a few months ago !! CITY OF MIST !

we just got rid of the mythos theme card and replaced the 4 theme cards with logos, which you could see from above :]

the session is still yet to be held ... but i can't wait to update once we finish it !! if the oneshot goes well, there's a chance it might turn into a mini campaign (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

ON ANOTHER NOTE...

you might be wondering: "why is her name ereighkauh? don't you already have another character named ereighkauh?"

WELL HAUHAUHAUHAHU i actually have 2 more characters named ereighkauh !! my minecraft SMP, my water genasi from tht one oneshot, and this.

it's basically an EREIGHKAUH: THE MULTIVERSE kind of character collection, where projections of me, erika, are transported into that universe <33 that's why you could see that torres-santiago looks a little like me ... BECAUSE SHE'S BASED OFF OF ME !!

and trust, there are more ereighkauhs to come :)

ON ANOTHER ANOTHER NOTE... (oh god when will she stop yapping)

i just want to put up a bit of ET-S's lore out here:

ets family are filipino immigrants (we assume that SBG is in a western modern setting) > dad got framed for a crime > BOOM SHOT > ets mad > forms a rebellious activist organization seeking to reform system and inform mainly through graffiti and art > called brushfire syndicate > has gathered 15-20 members > its a tightknit community and they are all close > ofc ets has a different persona in BS > her jacket is INVERTIBLE, that pink one u see her wearing is her daily wear > the reverse side is a colorful neon graffiti glow in the dark jacket and every other synonymous adjective for CHAOTICALLY FUN jacket > but anyways she goes to art school

tbh her being a leader of a small org was on purpose so that when the team gets sent into the shadow realm they'd have easy access to supplies and safehouses XD + urban terrain mastery so she parkours the hell outta there WHAUJSDAKSD

AND ALSO !! she has a black cat and a golden retriever :) very important detail yesyes <3333

[violets-and-books]

The Crows watching Horror Films

Kaz:

Loves horror movies

Is basically the perfect horror film watcher

Watches intently

Never jumps at the jump-scares, the most you'll get out of him is a startled 'oh'

Always guesses who the mystery killer is

Always guesses it correctly

Loves slasher films

Inej:

Not a big fan of most horror films

Likes the final girl trope

Prefers sci-fi horror to anything else

Will rant about the pseudo-sadist, purity-obsessed horror films and why they can be better to anyone who'll listen

Won't go out of her way to watch a horror but will make an effort if A) Kaz wants to or B) It's made by a diverse minority of some kind

Jesper:

Hates horror films

Watches them because Kaz and Wylan like them

Loves watching them with Wylan because it gives him an excuse to cuddle up to his boyfriend

"are you scared?" "no" (literally shaking in his seat)

Is that one guy who screams at the screen like a goat

"I wish Milo was here, I wish Milo was here, I WISH MILO WAS HERE, I WISH MILOOOOOOOO-"

"ThAt'S nOt WhErE bLoOd Is MeAnT tO bEeEeEEEEEEE-"

"Wy, hold me, I'm scared" "The film hasn't even started yet-"

Jumps at every jump scare. Every. Single. One.

Wylan:

Likes horror films, especially ghost ones

Finds them cathartic

Has long conversations about themes and analysing horror with Inej and Matthias

Has seen all the classics

Likes gothic horror films

Is the only one who'll put up with Jesper's antics

Can't watch slashers - too violent

If he gets scared, he'll cover his ears and scream in short bursts until he isn't scared anymore

Matthias:

Is that one guy who'll analyse the film while watching it

Points out how scientifically incorrect all the kills are

Has very specific catagories for what counts as a horror film

Loves cult films, especially the Wicker Man

Can't watch haunting films, hates them so, so much

Nina:

Doesn't like horror films

Makes fun of Jesper for being so scared but then screams just as loud as him

Yells and swears at the characters for being so stupid

Ended up practically glued to Matthias' lap, if she didn't start out that way

"NO ONE would be that stupid to actually do [X]"

Quotes Scream at every given opportunity

(whenever someone on screen has sex) "Ooooooooh, you gonna diiiiie"

Kuwei:

Laughs at the jumpscares

Not even like a nervous laugh, plain out, hilarious laughter

Knows everything about how the films were made

Loves horror, possibly even more than Kaz

"Jes, are you scared? You can hold my hand if you want"

Has to sit a safe distance away from Wylan at all times to avoid being murdered

Explains how they did that stunt on screen as the stunt is happening (but will shut up if asked nicely)

Really likes body horror