#oof i rambled here

[cassberry]

I was finally able to watch sneegs rats cameo and I'm actually so devastated.

I don't know if it was because I've watched a lot of sneeg content and am obsessed with o!sneeg, but the poor little guy was so sad ;-;

All his friends left him so he was trying to find a new home with new friends (which btw ouch. I would too after the 3rd(4th?) time)

And he did it! He finally found a place with people around his size! With buildings and furniture that fit him perfectly!

But they also didn't want him. The rats after quickly deciding he wouldn't be a good fit, immediately wanted to send him off.

And yeah as much as he said he was fine to go, I don't know, it really felt like o!sneeg kind of wanted to stay.

Because really, what awaited for him on the other side? An empty server with so many big empty buildings.

[what-is-it-to-be-pk-esque]

Lmfaooooo I am dying at Halsin just starting act 3 horny on main and straight up asking to be in a thruple, like, bro lmao

Everything about this interaction and the one right after if you decide to ask Astarion about it is gold 💀💀💀 his fucking Halsin impression haha

I so wonder what the others have to say if you're romancing them and get propositioned by the bear hahaha I'll bet it's great

[coockie8]

I can't prove this, and I'm not even 100% sure about it, but I feel like there's some kind of connection between the growing lack of horror media designed for children and the antiship movement.

'Cause growing up watching shit like Goosebumps had nothing but a positive impact on my ability to tell the difference between fiction and reality, and I feel like kids not having access to age-appropriate dark media is definitely contributing to this pro-censorship epidemic happening online.

[angeart]

Juni kept the wings??? T-T And I was wondering what would happen to him during the eclipse I wanna pick up Juni and take him to another world where he can learn to actually be safe and happy and figure himself out.

-🎀

he kept the wings!! because in his life he's never seen anyone treated with so much gentleness and love as scar treated grian, and in his head this means that if he himself is avian-like, maybe then he could also be deserving of such love!

...though he knows that's not right. not anymore. not after everything.

but wings are also a burden, and he feels like he needs to keep them, if only because grian can't take off his. it's a weak repentance, a frail, silly grasp at a connection he himself broke, but... he doesn't have much else.

he doesn't know who he should be, but the most he ever felt like himself was when he had wings, so. they say.

..... and. as for picking juni up and taking him away. yes. yes please. 🥺 he needs love and safety and space to figure himself out.

(but that's a wish we can't grant </33)

[fictive-culture]

Was gonna make this a fictive culture is post to queue but then decided I wanted to make a long thing tw: anti endo mention

Sometimes fictive culture or even just Introject culture is something negative happening related to the source and headmates not showing up till after the bad feeling subside by time

By this I mean that and I don't talk about this often but when we first realized we were a system we were eventually presented with telling our friends, sure there is always the option of not telling they aren't owed that information but for better or worse we hate being friends with people that don't know? We hate hiding ourselves and not being able to be friends with people as individuals rather than a collective. We were horrified and while it went well for the most part, the system I already knew was thankfully supportive of endos and another friend even shot back with a same! There was one friend that wasn't supportive a singlet that was firmly anti endo and one of my best friends at the time. We met on a kin server both being tf2 kin though after realizing we were a system those tf2 kins were for sure not kins. We were both huge fans and would create things for each other fanart, writing. It hurt a lot losing them and even if we didn't have solid proof we knew we had tf2 headmates could feel them even if we couldn't interact with them. It's been nearly two years since then, and they fronted for the first time since learning we were a system in September of last year just a few months ago and we were ecstatic. Just felt like a sign we were healing and we were getting truly comfortable in our shared reality and it felt so nice knowing they weren't trapped any longer we have names and faces to people we couldn't reach for so long and it makes us genuinely so happy to see them on our sp and see their chat messages we can also look at tf2 content without being sad anymore? We can enjoy something we lost for a really long time and I don't know I just wanted to share that with y'all? Things hurt but it lessens over time, if you lost a joy you may be able to enjoy it again one day, if you are worried about a headmate they may return to you one day, if you are that headmate from a source the body has bad memories of know that you will still be missed that you are still wanted and your sysmates will smile and cry and hug you if you returned from disappearing. Sometimes we still miss them, especially one of our tf2 crewmates but we are all much happier knowing they aren't in our life and we aren't trying to fit into their box of what is and isn't okay. Even if we did end up being mostly traumagenic traumaendo the endo part is still so important to us and we and all of you deserve people that accept and love those parts of you too.

[lavender-temult]

why do baby otohan’s colors look like fuckign TOOTHPASTE in this version 😭😭😭

[buckera]

at this point i'm convinced some people are just trying to pick fights to make a name for themselves in the fandom and i'm like... i blocked people for less lmao

[hergrandplan]

i slept like 3 hours last night today's gonna be rough lol

[dootznbootz]

As someone with ADHD, you know you're fucking exhausted when you're not even fidgeting. :'D

[x-atlas-x]

we never see yugi as a kid, but i feel like he’d be a happy and cheerful kid- he’d be more talkative and bold with the things he does. he’s still shy, but around his family and the people he knows, i feel like he would be loud and begging any of them to play games with him.

he asks his grandpa to teach him the rules to new games in the shop. he wants to learn a lot about duel monsters, but his grandpa waits to teach him once he can understand all of it better. still, he lets him look at the cards and collect them.

it’s not until later on, once he gets older and puberty hits, that he becomes more anxious and closed off from everyone. he’s seen as lame and the outcast of the class. he’s different compared to all of them. they’re not kids anymore, they’re teenagers.

none of them want to play games anymore. they want to date and talk about their crushes, or sports. yugi still likes games, and therefore, he’s seen as the nerd.

but, once he puts the puzzle together and summons yami/atem, he finds someone that shares his love for games, and that’s equally passionate about it (albeit, it results in some people dead, but y’know, minor details).

yami/atem makes him feel like a kid again and that just strengthens their bond even more :,)

[illbestarryeyedforyou]

When you say becoming a father??? Are you saying like SOON?! 👀

okay so

I've been looking into Single Father Surrogacy.

Now, I am still trying to understand the whole process of what it will initial, and different types of surrogacies because I honestly didn't know of these two above on the image, and that could only be it, but I'm trying to figure out or understand it better. I feel as though educating myself first is the right decision before I do anything else. I don't know what I'll have to do in terms of supporting said person carrying my baby, but I'm willing to fund everything and do anything required of me to make it happen.

I'll most likely start the application and inquiring process next year, but I am aiming for when I'm thirty-two or latest , thirty-five years old to make the single father surrogacy a reality.

I know it sounds pathetic or weird, etc but I've come to accept and be at peace at least that I might not find someone out there? You know, to love and create wholesome, small but meaningful memories with, etc.

I was also super okay in being with someone who already had children through prior relationship(s), heck I would have loved their kids as my own or at least treat them with so much love, care, and hopefully become someone they would be able to trust, etc. I was totally okay with that and all I would have asked said partner is one child from both of us or if not, them to be okay with me becoming a sperm donor.

However, I'm not going to go on dating apps ever again (although I might try eHarmony just to give these next two years a shot) and no one here where I live interests me so I know that I will most likely end up being single forever. And that's okay. I really am okay with that. 😊😊😊 Sometimes life is that way.

However, I am super lucky and grateful about the fact that I do still have an opportunity in becoming a parent without a partner through surrogate.

I know I said, I was okay with having a partner that didn't want kids, and I am, but only if they would be okay with me becoming a sperm donor so if ever, it would be used and I'll know that there's a little half me out there (if I'm not allowed to be involved in their life). I feel ready to be a parent. I want that responsibility. I believe in my ability to be a great father and so this will be the "taboo" measure that I'm willing and will take to become a dad. 😊😊

Sorry about rambling, but I'm passionate about this AND I just wanted to share a little more context to your ask.

Yes, I do have plans on becoming a father soon 😊😊😊

[silvreflames]

Rio! I have a random question about nesta as a girl who grew up overly pushed and forced into "feminine perfection" by her mom, how did she experience the realization that she couldnt fulfill those toxic expectations that her mom forced on her because of her own trauma and the what the cauldron did to her? Not me asking bc of my own mommy issues lmao sorry if you already talked abt this here! Also idk if i made any sense wiith this question in my head i did

euge my darling i could kiss you on the mouth. i've been sitting on this ask for like 2 weeks now because it's just so juicy and i've been wanting to do it (and nesta) justice in how i answer it with regards to my portrayal.

honestly? i don't think nesta HAS come to this realization. and i say this because i don’t think she is in a space mentally or emotionally to understand that those expectations ARE toxic. certainly not in a canon world LMAO but not really in my interpretation either. i think that the rotten roots that her mother dug into her at such a young age are so deep that it will likely take decades for nesta to really even understand just how badly she's been harmed. and the canon treatment she receives at the hands of the IC absolutely does not go far in mending the mindset she's been brainwashed into either.

i mean. people can talk about how prythian doesn't uphold the patriarchal ideals that the human world does because it's an entirely different culture and species but the fact of the matter is that that's just complete bogus. men rule prythian. and you can argue that amarantha was in charge and blah blah blah the human queens blah blah blah but the fact of the matter is, tamlin wasn't putting feyre down when he told her there weren't high ladies among the fae. he was simply stating a fact. viviane of winter court (arguably an incredible leader considering the winter court did not sway under amarantha's rule while kallias was under the mountain) was clearly slighted when rhysand made feyre the first high lady.

and don't even get me started on the treatment of illyrian women. the abuse that those young girls and women are subjected to by illyrian men (rhysand's people!) is very close to the treatment that nesta expects as someone who grew up knowing that her only fate, the only role she would fit into, was that of a submissive wife to ensure her family's care. that those women are being violated so horribly because it's "tradition" just further proves to her that safety is not an option. that freedom is not an option.

all that to say, nesta can't break out of those expectations because she doesn't have the tools or the knowledge to be able to do it. not even when she goes to live in the supposedly amazing world of the fae that her baby sister so dearly loves. she is forced into “fae ideals” which are not far off from what she’s already familiar with. she is “promised” (mated) to a man for the “good of her family” (the IC/rhys/feyre) whether she wants to be or not and “society” (the IC) expects her to stay quiet and accept it and do it beautifully and to stop being in pain so loudly. because that’s feminine perfection of course!

i think that. even if she DID realize this. she would be in deep denial. lune and i are giving nessian the story that they deserve, but trauma is trauma. and like i said it’s going to take a long time for nesta to uncover how badly she’s been hurt for so long. but even just uncovering it won’t “fix” or help her. there are so many layers to the way her mother’s expectations cut away at her (and continue and will continue to do so!).

i believe nesta knows her mother was cruel, but she wouldn’t believe she’s been harmed without reason. which is why, even realizing that the expectations foisted on her were terrible and she couldn’t meet them if she really tried, she would simply be devastated that she could fail so badly. because that’s all she does in her own eyes, you know? she failed her mother, she failed her sisters, she failed her father, she fails cassian, she fails herself. she wouldn't think, "gee i shouldn't have been treated like shit like that", she'd think, "wow i can't believe i became high fae and i still can't manage to take care of my fucking family". i think it would be a setback in her healing and she’d have to climb those stairs too.

[quietlyblooms]

guess who has to make herself ready for a water park tomorrow :' )

[hecatesbroom]

To be honest I was wondering if you have a top 5 of books 👀

Hii! Now, that's a hard question :') I have so many!! I think if I were to make a top 5, it'd look something like this:

(Limited to English books only because I really wouldn't know how to choose otherwise haha)

The Locked Tomb series by Tamsyn Muir (if I had to pick just one, it'd be Harrow the Ninth, book 2 in the series)

The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien (which he wanted to have published as one big book, so hey, this isn't technically cheating!)

Carmilla by J. Sheridan Le Fanu

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid

The Kingdoms by Natasha Pulley

I tried to vary a bit in genre with this, and honestly my favourite books change quite frequently, but I'd say the top 3 are pretty stable! (I'm not sure anything will ever be able to beat The Locked Tomb for me anymore haha)

[gogglebeast]

Hey guys! Sorry for the long radio silence- quite a lot has happened in the past few months, but I'd like to try and start being a bit more active around these parts?

(We lost Karmel after an aggressive battle with cancer at the end of September, my dad died in the same week (we weren't close- I haven't seen him in years in fact but still) and then, a month later my mom was in the hospital for a week for a very concerning mystery problem that we never fully figured out- she's thankfully doing better now! But oof, it was a rough holiday season, and I'm lucky I have people in my life helping me through it.

I've been dealing with possible heart issues for about a month now, and am Hoping it's just stress giving me palpitations- certainly can't imagine where that could have come from if it is! But at least I have an appointment with a cardiologist next week to try and get a better idea of what's been going on.)

I know I don't need to explain Why I haven't been around, and my presence on social media the past few years has definitely been on and off- but I want a place I can type out my little thoughts and share my little doodles when I have them again!!

[freakwiththeknifecollection]

Years of reading and writing disapproving parent fic have come back to haunt me, as I'M now the one committing faux pas in front of my partner's uptight parents 🫠✌️