#only to shoot myself in the foot while in the middle of Act 3 on tactician

[lindira]

Ugh. So I (wrongly) assumed that if the BG3 mods were internal and supported, then the achievements would act as normal. ...Which is apparently not the case. *headdesk*

I was almost done with my Tactician run when I installed some cosmetic and quality of life mods through Patch 7. I want my achievement! And I want to try Honor Mode also! I'm wondering if I can still get the achievement if I uninstall the mods, reload a save before I installed them, then keep playing that way??? Otherwise I'll have to wait until Patch 7 is supported by the Achievement Enabler mod on Nexus...

[project-sour-grapes]

State of the Union

I have hit the same roadblocks repeatedly in my life for 29 years. Or 26, if we consider that the first 3 years of life are basically boilerplate.

After a childhood of being told I was special, or after my temperament demanded that I be treated as special, or some feedback loop of the two, I am accepting that I am not. I am not inherently special. At the very least, acting like I am has gotten me nowhere. I half-ass everything I do. I rest on my laurels. I wait for things to turn into emergencies before I take action. I sit and observe things, and--while there is a role for the philosopher-sitter-observer in life--this has prevented me from taking action and making things happen. Whenever I hit an obstacle, I give up. Or I think of changing course entirely. I could be sailing in the middle of the ocean and come across a log and say, "Shoot, I better turn around."

I started this blog as a goodbye to that sort of thinking. I started it as a way to catalog my journey away from that life. But I'm turning around and realizing I'm merely a foot further from shore than I was a year ago.

There's that Confucius saying about "going slow" vs "stopping" along your journey that any Tumblr veteran knows. But this trajectory is just not satisfactory. I am going so slow towards my goals that it's almost as bad as being stopped. Hell, it might be worse, because I can comfort myself with my millimeters of progress, and say, "Well, I'm moving," and then blame the microscopic magnitude of it on anything that feels comforting at the time. "That's just how the system works." Or, "I'm just being patient." Or, "Maybe this just isn't the right path for me."

And maybe this isn't the right path for me. But I'm not going to find that out by being mediocre. Or by working only one hour a day toward my goal.

I was talking to my mother a few weeks ago about why I can't finish anything I start, big or small. I told her that I wanted to leave healthcare already and that my patients were starting infuriate me. Then after the hour-long practical conversation about work-life balance and "pros and cons," which is all of the typical career advice that anybody ever gets, she just said frankly, "Whatever you're running from, once you realize it and are ready to stop running, you'll find your goal."

The things that came to mind when she said that include:

running from body dysphoria (since I'm a man born with female body parts)

running from my desire for but difficulty with building friendship and relationships

running from my gigantic ego, since I don't know what to do with it

As I'm writing this, I want to stop and change course real quick. What if what I'm running from is my huge ego? And my fear of it means it just comes out in unhealthy ways? My repeated career and relationship failures would show as much.

Old school psychology is kind of goofy, but I'm thinking of Freud's concept of sublimation, where anything that we bury just comes out in new, weird ways. And in Jungian psychology, the things we don't like about ourselves or that are the more animalistic parts of ourselves (our "shadow") will make themselves known one way or another. The most vital, carnal parts of the human psyche fester like a pressure cooker unless we let off steam in a healthy way. "What we resist persists" is a true statement even for the ego.

I can't resist my ego. I can only channel it. The human ego is a powerful force, and with that, there are only two things I can do with that energy:

use it to compress diamonds in my own life

use it to make coal to burn others

Looking at the track record of my life, I have gotten most off track after I have accidentally acquired a pile of coal and then decided to weaponize it. Perhaps this was because I felt entitled to diamonds instead, and lighting the coal was a "fuck you" to those I had held my hand out to.

I think my mother was right. I am running from something. (Maybe several things, but) The something is my ego.

I'm not going to bury it or accept being average (at least the kind where no progress is being made year-over-year) or Buddhism my way out of it. I am going to run with it.

"What is the best way to ride a horse? The direction in which it is running." -Somebody

There are a few analogies for embracing the ego that I want to mull over the next few weeks. The ego is:

like fire in that it can keep you warm and aid in survival or it can burn your house down

like nuclear power in that it is the most efficient form of energy known to man or it can poison entire cities if handled poorly

like a German Shepherd or Belgian Malinois; it can either sniff out the bombs and incapacitate the bad guys or it can rip up your entire living room and shit the bed

It's not the ego that is the problem. It's what you do with it. It's where you point it and why.

Anything powerful can be both protective and harmful. Who are you serving with your ego: yourself or your community? Ideally, it would be a mix of both. My problem has been lopsidedness and then victimhood and self-righteous indignation when nobody even asked for my lopsideness to start.

With all of that being said, a few things are true:

I am not special and the world owes me nothing.

I have a huge ego, and if I work for what I want, I will fucking get it or something even better

It's the tension between these statement that gives rise to human motivation (past the lizard brain motivations like food, water, etc.). It's like in Ernest Becker's "Denial of Death," where he says mankind's greatest achievements are pitiful attempts to live forever. Or F. Scott Fitzgerald's belief that we should be able to "hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless yet be determined to make them otherwise." We are both statistically not special in a world of 8 billion people and such an expansive universe, and yet having an ego is the most human thing ever.

And that's the universe: just paradoxes and the tension between them, and mankind's convenient spot at the center. Everything in the universe is in flux. Nothing in the body or in nature is static. It's all trajectories and voltages and potentials in the Physics sense.

Thus I will both accept that I'm not special and that my ego is gigantic, and that's aight.

How do I channel the powerful force of the ego in a healthy way then, like those superhero movies montage where the hero starts using their powers and sucks at first and breaks everything in their kitchen but then masters them? Honestly, fuck if I know. I have shit to do the rest of tonight, and I'm going to have to think on this one.

Will come back with more ideas, but the goal is not to squash the ego, but to channel it for good. Don't put out the fire, just learn how to use it like any other tool.

That's it for now.

Other quotes that are on my mind today:

Life is a numbers game.

The grass is green where you water it.

Have a good one.

[darylsgirl]

The Farmers Daughter                       Daryl Dixon Smut 18+

Request: Hey i really love all your stories. Could you do one where, the reader is Hershel's daughter and she has just turned 21 and she has a massive crush on Daryl. She is tired of being babied by the entire family ( they won't let her out of prison gates cause she's young) so she asks to go on a run with Daryl as her 21st bday gift. On the run she kinda seduces him and smut ensues.

Also she has kinda tried to seduce him at the prison before too (just subtle hints)

Please please take my request 🥺🥺🥺

Hey guys! Here’s my first ever story written for a request! Hope you liked the way it turned out Anon! And i hope your all having a lovely day <3

Love Jen x

                                                    Masterlist 

You had to admit it was a beautiful day. Looking out across the prison yard, If you ignored the walkers groaning at the fences and well... the whole end of the world thing it might have been a perfect day. Everyone was feeling safe and relaxed for the first time in a long time and enjoying the day as you would have before the end. 

Approaching your dad seeing the relaxed look on his face, You’d thought this would be the perfect opportunity to ask him to let you go out on a run, You were the middle green daughter and he didn’t let you forget it. It was so unfair! He always let Maggie and Beth do whatever they wanted but kept you close by at all times wanting to teach you all he could about medicine, Treating you like nothing more than a baby even though you had just turned 21. 

As always when you asked to go with Daryl his face turned to stone. “You know my feelings on this Y/N, Your much too young, Everyone has a job to do and yours is here” 

“Dad please! I’ve been training, I can take care of myself. You let Beth go! She’s younger than me! Stop treating me like a child” 

“Y/N that’s enough, I said no” 

Knowing you wouldn’t get anything further out of him you stormed off it probably didn’t help things that you were maybe acting like a bit of a child right now. But you couldn’t help it, you were so mad! He had to know you were no longer a child. Most middle children get ignored but not you, He was more strict when it came to you, Babied you constantly. Even before the end Maggie and Beth loved it of course it meant they got away with more because he was always so focused on you. 

Part of you understood why. There had been a nasty incident a few years back with a boy from school which ended in your dad having to pull a shot gun at him to get him to stay away from you. Smiling you remembered the prick’s probably dead now, You’d definitely gotten the last laugh!

Ever since then Hershel had been extremely protective of you, He’d let you attend self defence classes and even taught you to shoot, Which is why it was so mind boggling that he wouldn’t let you do your part. You felt useless just sitting around all day reading old medical books and occasionally helping fix someone up. 

You wanted more than anything to be out there, Pulling your weight helping feed this family! You needed to be out there….With him.

When Daryl had appeared on your family’s farm that day on his motorbike, Your knees almost went weak. That was a man, He was sheer perfection. Unfortunately for you he was a bit of a standoffish man. 

You tried for weeks to get his attention shyly moving closer to him whenever he was around, Whenever he even looked at you he caused the blush to rise in your cheeks.

When he had fallen onto his arrow you were there mopping his brow as he slept. Sadly when he woke he only gave you a grunt of acknowledgement. But still it was more than he had before. 

Still you persisted, He had started warming up to you more since the trip to the prison. You were the one to make sure he ate and cleaned him up every time he managed to get another wound. It was slow going but before you knew it muttered thanks had turned into longer sentences from him. 

He still wasn’t much of a talker but at least he noticed you now. Not in the way you wanted him to but it was better than nothing.

You raised your hand in welcome to him as you saw him making his way across the yard to you.

“Hershel say no?” He asked when he came and took a seat with you on the grass. 

Nodding you sighed, pulling your knees to your ample chest.  Nudging you slightly “Ya don’t wanna be out there anyway, Get’s too dangerous” 

Rolling your eyes “Oh please not you too? How many times do i have to say i can handle myself! I just need a few hours out of here!”

An idea coming to your head you turned to him putting your hand on his shoulder, He froze slightly at this as he seemed to every time anyone touched him. Deciding to ignore it you turned his torso slightly to face yours. 

“You could convince him! You said yesterday there was a pharmacy not too far from here that looked untouched!” 

Shaking his head at you “No Y/N I ain’t goin against Hershel, He’s a good man” 

“Please Daryl, You could consider it a birthday gift to me? And i could be useful! I know what medicines to look out for” 

“Who said i was gonna get ya anything?” He grumbled. Moving closer to him and putting your hand on his chest. 

“Please Daryl, He’ll listen to you” You purred hoping it came across sultry. 

His eyes met yours very briefly, His eyes wide when he saw how close you were. Standing to his feet suddenly “Alright fine, If it’ll get ya to quit harpin on”

He turned leaving you on the grass before stalking off towards your dad. You waited there for what felt like forever watching the corner he had disappeared behind. 

When he finally reappeared you got to your feet meeting him halfway.

“Well?” He gave you a short nod of confirmation. Jumping up at him excitedly you wrapped your arms around his neck. “Thank you!!” He froze in place again before relaxing into your hug. 

Patting your shoulder once “Go on then, Get ya stuff we leave in 10” As you pulled away you saw a slight smile on his lips before running back to the Cells to grab a bag. Packing two bottles of water and some protein bars leaving the rest empty to carry anything you might find. Slinging it over your shoulder before strapping your pistol to one side of your belt and your knife on the other. 

Running back out you saw your dad waiting by the step. You almost knocked him off his crutches hugging him tightly

“Thank you Daddy”

He hugged you back “You be safe Y/N Listen to everything Daryl tells you!” Pulling away from him you nodded gratefully. 

“Ready to go?” Smiling you turned and started to walk away. Hearing your dad call “Take care of my little girl Dixon!” Daryl just raised an arm in response before leading you over to the bike. 

Swinging his leg over her motioned for you to do the same. Smiling happily you jumped on the back wrapping your arms firmly around his chest, Your fingers desperately wanting to touch all of him. 

“Ya don’t need to hold on so tight!” He grumbled at you. “Oh sorry!” You moved your hands slowly from his chest favouring every second until they were resting gently on his waist. As he pulled out of the main gate you put your chin on his shoulder grinning.

He hid the bike a few blocks away from the pharmacy before continuing on foot. On the way you only encountered one walker. Putting your hand on his arm as he raised his crossbow. 

“Let me do it” He nodded to you, letting you charge ahead with your knife drawn. Easily taking the walker down, Swiping the walkers feet from under it you plunged your knife into his head before turning back to Daryl “See i can take care of myself”

Handing you a rag from his belt you cleaned the blood off your knife before handing it back to him. 

“Never said you couldn’t Y/N” he said before continuing on to the pharmacy. As you reached the shutters Daryl Raised one slightly looking underneath before knocking on the shutter a few times making a racket.

“Daryl! What are you doing” You whispered urgently. 

He put his finger to his mouth while he listened for a moment before pulling the shutter fully open stepping behind it motioning for you to follow. Stepping in you noticed the door to the pharmacy was still closed and your bodies were pressed tightly together. 

Your breath was stuck in your chest, Your heart pounding as you felt his body on yours. He looked at you confused for a moment before moving his arms around you to the open shutter. Pulling it back down again, You felt as the muscles in his arms rolled down your entire body pulling the shutter. His head was at your crotch when you let in a sharp intake of breath as his head brushed you core. 

He darted upwards to you again “You ok Y/N? We can go back if ya scared”

His words snapping you out of it, You felt the blush rise in your face “m’not scared”

You were dying for him to kiss you, As you looked up you saw his lips were only inches from yours, Surely he had to feel this too? You closed your eyes inching closer till your lips were just about touching. You could feel his hot breath cascading over your lips. The world paused for a second while you waited to see if he would close the gap. 

Clearing his throat “Looks empty, Let’s go in” You opened your eyes as you heard the tinkle of the bell signalling the door had been opened. And just as quick as the moment had come it was gone. 

You stood frozen at the door for a moment trying to gather your thoughts. Could he really not see what just being in close proximity to him did to her? 

You walked after him further into the pharmacy jumping behind the desk “Jackpot! This place is completely untouched!” 

“Grab what we need, We’ll come back for the rest with more people” 

You filled your bag as Daryl went around the aisles picking up other essentials. 

You closed the pharmacy back up adding a lock to the shutter as you left, Hopefully no one else would stumble across it before you had a chance to come back. 

Daryl agreed when you asked to walk back through the woods. It was far too hot to go all that way in the sun. It was still hot under the trees but at least you were being protected from the sun, Daryl stopped and waited for you as you dropped your bag pulling off the loose over shirt your father always made you wear. 

You saw his eyes wander over you as it came over your head showing your curves to him for the first time in your tight white vest. 

His eyes were dark, You couldn’t tell if he was angry with you or if it was something else. 

Looking away from him now “Sorry, I just need some air….Wait what’s that?” He darted forward pushing his body in front of you looking for danger. 

Rolling your eyes you stepped around him picking up the bag and heading to the cabin you had seen. Stopping in the doorway you copied Daryl’s previous actions knocking on the doorway. 

All of a sudden his arms were around you lifting you from the ground pulling you inside the cabin, Closing the door behind you both his hand was over your mouth, His mouth to your ear “Shh, There’s a herd bout 50, Don’t think they saw us” 

As he put you gently back down you both made your way further into the cabin to check for threats, After searching the bedroom he pulled you inside before blocking the door with the set of drawers. 

He made his way to the bed before lying down “might as well make ourselves comfortable gonna be here awhile” You sat on the bed not facing him for a moment before taking a deep breath and lying down on the bed. 

You saw him looking at your chest before he sat back up “Almost forgot” He grabbed his bag. “Happy birthday 21 right?” 

Pulling out a bottle of whiskey and handing it to you. You looked at it nervously taking a deep breath and just going for it. You ripped the cork out taking a deep swig, Dropping the bottle back down you scrunched your nose a little in disgust

“What girl ya never had whiskey?” 

“Never had any alcohol, Dad never let us with him being in recovery and all” You shrugged taking another pull on the bottle. 

He snatched it from your hands then “Didn’ no it were your first. Ya can’t drink it like water, Gotta take it slow” 

You chuckled slightly at his words laying back down on the bed with him following you. 

“What’s so funny kid?” 

“Don’t call me that” You said as your eyes narrowed. 

He looked at you amused “It’s what ya are” 

Lurching forward you pressed your lips to his, feeling him freeze under you, You held your lips there urgently, Pulling your hands to his face and pulling it to yours. You pulled away slightly when he didn’t return the kiss.

“I aint a kid, I saw the way you looked at me earlier. I know you know that too” You said breathlessly. 

Looking down at your lips he replied “Ya still Hershel’s Kid he wouldn’ like this” He ran his hand through his hair.

Feeling angry again Your hands were still on his face “Does it look like i care what he thinks? Right now Daryl all I care about is this. Feeling you against me. I need it. I’ve needed it since the moment i saw you” 

His eyes darted up to yours seeing only the truth in your eyes. “Kiss me Dixon” 

His tongue licked his bottom lip slightly. Pushing your lips back to his you took his bottom lip in your mouth tugging on it slightly with your teeth. 

You heard the low growl coming from his chest as you tugged harder. 

“Fuck it” He muttered against your lips before flipping you onto your back kissing you back harshly. 

You let a moan escape your lips as he settled over you arching into his chest, He nudged your knees apart before putting one hand behind your thigh and lifting it around his hips. The other hand was on your waist. Both hands kneading your skin harshly. 

His hands felt like they were burning through your clothes. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as he pushed his tongue into your mouth, Moaning again you ground your hips upwards desperate to feel his heat against yours. 

He pulled away panting resting his forehead against yours. 

“You sure Y/N” Grinning at him you pulled your hands to the neck of your shirt ripping it open slightly. 

“Never been so sure Daryl” His eyes watched growing darker, pulling his hands to the rip you had started already he ripped the shirt from you with ease, hands going to the front of your bra tearing that too. 

You could feel his breath on your chest as he ducked down taking one of your nipples into your mouth and biting down on it. You moaned louder now reaching down, you pushed the vest from his shoulder before turning your attention to his shirt groaning as you realised you couldn’t reach the hem to pull it up. 

He chuckled watching you sitting up over you he pulled the shirt off himself. Glaring down at you now with his dark hungry eyes. Moving from you he stood next to the bed. 

“Take em off...Now” His thick southern drawl made your already wet panties soak. 

Your hand slowly went to the button on your jeans not wanting to take your eyes off him, His glare grew darker.

“Ya aint fast enough” He lunged over you gripping the pants at your sides and tearing them down, You gasped now realising you were fully bare for him, His eyes met yours as you looked towards his pants, Your thighs rubbing together in delicious anticipation. 

He untied the cord of material holding his pants up letting them drop to the ground. 

Licking your lips you stared at his huge length. Walking over to you he pressed his cock to your lips gently.

“This what you want?” 

“Mmm yes please Daryl” You stuck your tongue out tasting the tip of him, God he tasted good. You opened your lips intending to wrap them around him, When you felt a hand in your hair pulling your head back. 

“Say ya want my cock Y/N in that dirty little mouth” Looking at his eyes now you could see he was serious. 

Pushing him back from the bed you climbed off sinking to your knees in front of him. 

“Mmmm let me have your cock in my dirty….little….Mouth…..Please?” You breathed

His fingers caressed your face for a moment He murmured “Better Y/N….Go on take what ya want girl” 

Reaching your hands up to his length you held it gleefully smiling as you brought it back to your mouth. Swirling your tongue around the tip you let your eyes fix on his again as you sunk him deep into your mouth, As it hit your throat you let it choke you slightly moaning around his length. 

“Shit Y/N” Daryl let his mouth drop open and his head hang backwards enjoying your lips around him, Putting his hands back in your hair he pushed you fully down his length until your lips met his pubic bone, You choked again, Breathing through your nose you held yourself on him getting used to the feeling of him stretching your throat. 

Moaning on him again he pushed and pulled you over his cock until you felt it throbbing, Pulling you fully off him he looked back down at you wildly. 

“Shit, Ya too good at that. I almost -” You cut him off pulling him back into your mouth with determination bobbing faster over him until he fell over the edge spilling his huge load into your mouth. You heard him cry out your name whilst he fucked your face harder letting the last of his orgasm roll out. 

Once he slowed you pulled him from your mouth swallowing before licking every inch of him clean drinking every drop like it was life or death. 

He wrapped one hand around your throat now pulling you back up to him. 

“Get back on the bed, Knees up legs wide. Now” He growled. 

Still catching your breath you did as you were told. He kneeled on the bed between your legs rubbing his still hard cock up and down your folds. Grinning at you mischievously he pulled completely away, Watching you squirm from the lack of contact. 

Leaning over your body he whispered in your ear 

“Ya aint ready for that...Not yet anyway” He roughly pushed your chin upwards pushing your head back into the pillow. 

Kissing his way down your neck he moved to your chest, Lifting your breast he sucked just underneath your nipple hard enough to leave his mark, Moving down your sternum he left three more identical marks from your breasts to your belly button. Marking you as his. As he reached your dripping heat you tried to grind up towards him.

Using his hand over your hips he held you down, 

“Ya gotta wait Y/N You’ll get it when im fucking ready” He growled again before sinking his teeth into the inside of your thigh, You let out a loud mewl trying to stem the noise biting down on your forearm. 

He bit harder now before letting go and glaring up at you, “Dont ya dare stop it, I wanna hear ya”

Panting for breath you looked down at him “But the …...Mmm shit...The walkers..will hear us!” 

“Let them fuckin hear, I’ll kill everyone of those dead bastards if they try to get between me and this sweet pussy” He ran one finger softly down your folds to accentuate his point. 

Moving your hand back down onto the bed you gripped the sheets with both hands as he sucked and bit the inside of both of your thighs leaving multiple love bites. 

“Please Daryl! I can...ntt take it anymore”

Seeing the need in your eyes he harshly took your clit in his mouth sucking and nibbling on it before moving his tongue down to your entrance, He lapped at the juices flowing out of you for a minute before replacing his tongue with his fingers, Pushing two inside he rocked them in and out of you bringing his lips back to your throbbing clit. 

“God Y/N you taste so fucking good” You could feel the pleasure building higher and your moans getting louder as you were rapidly reaching your high. You could feel your walls clenching on his fingers as he started moving quicker. 

“Ahhh, Shit Daryl” You screamed letting your high crash around you, You could feel him moaning into your clit as you screamed his name. Pushing another finger into you as you rode them blissfully feeling him stretch them inside you before pulling them out, Leaning back over you he pressed his fingers to your mouth. 

“Clean em” You sucked on them happily feeling the slickness in your pussy coming back as it did every time you saw him. 

Once he had deemed them clean enough he dropped his hand back to you.

“Mmm ready for me again so soon?” You bit your lip gazing up at him with your best innocent face. 

“So ready baby, Please...Please fuck me Daryl”

“Ya only needed to ask Y/N” He quickly pumped his cock a few times before pushing it slowly into you, Gasping a little in pain he stopped. “You ok?” 

“Yeah….Its just so fucking big” He grinned as he continued pushing into you until he reached his hilt grunting as he felt your walls moulding around him. Staying still for a moment he let you get used to his length. Pressing his lips back down to yours he tugged at your lower lip with his teeth parting your lips before diving back in with his tongue. 

Your tongues danced together fighting for dominance, He moaned into your mouth as he started moving again slowly at first building his speed until he was pounding mercilessly into you. 

Rolling back till he was sat back on his legs he pulled your legs over his shoulders gripping them tightly using them to drive himself even deeper and harder into you. Your hands wound your way into your own hair pulling at it gently letting the pleasure of his relentless pounding completely take control of your senses as you feel yourself letting go to him again. 

You back arched high as you felt your high building. 

Daryl let one hand fall to your aching clit rolling it with his fingers. 

“That’s it Y/N cum for me, Cum all over this cock” He growled loudly. You felt him pulsing inside you and it sent you straight over the edge. 

“Fuckkkkk Daryl!!” You screamed bucking your hips against him as you rode out your high. 

Daryl couldn’t take it anymore watching you buck wildly against him screaming his name, He exploded thrusting deeper into you letting his hot cum wash over your walls. 

He let go of your legs letting them crash to the sides of him, Your entire body was trembling now as he collapsed forward on top of you, Both gasping for air. 

When he rolled off you, You looked him straight in the eyes “Told you i could be useful” You giggled. 

“I think we may need to convince ya dad to let you on more of these runs Y/N. Very fucking useful” he said pushing his lips back to yours for a sweet kiss this time. 

Putting his arm around your shoulders he pulled you to him letting your head lay on his chest. You could definitely get used to this. 

You sighed before continuing in awe “Happy fucking birthday to me” 

He chuckled kissing your hair. You lay happily in his arms until the sun started to go down, Only breaking the happy stillness to let your lips meet lovingly.

Looking out the window he murmured “C’mon best be getting back. Dont need em sendin out a search party and findin us like this” 

Groaning you let him pull you up, Both getting dressed. Daryl picked up your ruined shirt and bra stuffing them into his own bag with a wink, Thank god you had worn two shirts today. Daryl then pulled the draws away from the door running through the cabin to check it was still secure. You followed him out of the cabin and back to the bike. 

Happily putting your arms around him and running your fingers across his chest, Enjoying the last moments of your freedom as he drove you back to the prison and through the gates.

You sisters came running to meet you as you returned checking you over before giving you hugs in turn, Maggie took a step back staring into your eyes for a moment before leaning back into you whispering so only you two could hear

“I see you got your birthday wish lil sis” Your eyes went wide in panic, Grinning at you she whispered again. “I know the scent of cum when I smell it. It’s all over your breath, That and you're definitely no longer wearing a bra” 

You flushed embarrassed hoping no one else would notice looking back at her with a panicked whisper “Don’t tell Daddy!” She nodded at you looking behind you to the guard tower “Looks like it's time for round two” She nodded towards Daryl who was standing there staring at you drinking you in with his eyes again. 

“Don’t worry ill cover for you, Just go” She winked. Running over to the tower you slipped in closing the door as you felt his hand at your throat again. 

“Ya all mine now Y/N”

“So you don’t think I’m a kid anymore” You asked playfully. 

“Nah, Your definitely all fucking woman” He growled back before pulling you back into a room and fucking you till you were mewling all over again for him.

Taglist! :) Let me know if you want on or off it :) 

@pncnsc​

@jazzy1118​​

@one-shot-plus-size​

@marvelfansworld​

@phoenixblack89​ 

@fuseburner​

@angelofthorr​

@jodiereedus22​

                                                   Masterlist

[bonjour-rainycity]

Double Heart | Chapter Seven ~ Haldir

|previous part|

Pairing: Haldir x OFC

Rating: PG-13

Word count: 2738

Warnings: Canon-level violence, injury, blood

**Read on Ao3 under the user “bonjour_rainycity” if you prefer!**

A/n Happy Monday! I’m so thankful for each and every one of you <3

We rise with the first rays of the sun. As much as I hate to admit it, I feel refreshed after a full rest. I slept soundly, trusting my brothers to do their job well. They did spend the whole night awake though, so I make a note to ensure that they sleep tonight, even if they will need to get up for second watch. As helpful as it would be to have two others on the watch rotation, I can’t risk putting the humans to the job—their senses are so inferior. I’ve snuck up on them nearly ten times by now, all without meaning to.

Rumil brings Roch into line behind Faervel. Farther on Roch’s back sits Cosima, her arms wrapped around my brother’s middle. She’s much more comfortable on the horse now, and if the mountains weren’t so rocky and full of steep drop-offs, I would suggest that she lead the horse—the experience is important. Alexander has expressed zero interest in learning how to care for or ride a horse, or learn anything about Arda, really. I will allow him the journey to adjust, but if he decides to return with us to Lothlórien, he will have to acquire skills to become more self-sufficient. Though, I have a feeling Alexander will attempt to leave this realm, or, at the very least, seek out a human settlement. I just don’t know if Cosima will go with him. She seems to have accepted our world and has taken steps towards making it her own, but she is tied to her human friend. The hold he has over her concerns me, though I do understand it. They’re each other’s only tie to the world they left behind. It would be hard to break that bond.

The sun rises above one of the higher peaks, blinding me for the brief second it takes for my eyes to adjust. Looking up, I see the morning sky is decorated with thick stripes of pale pink and brilliant gold. I take a second, and only a second, to enjoy it, then return to scanning my surroundings. This level of vigilance used to exhaust me, but by now, it’s as natural as breathing. Even when I am off duty, taking my leave in Caras Galadon or vacationing in Imladris or elsewhere, I never fully relax my surveillance. It is better to be prepared. Advanced warning can mean everything.

I hear the sound of a canteen rattling and Cosima clears her throat. “Hey, Haldir?”

“Yes?”

“When did you say we would reach that stream?”

I stretch my eyesight as far I can. It’s difficult in the mountains, where boulders and peaks and valleys hinder a proper line of sight, but I make out a slight glimmer on a rock far ahead of us—sun glinting off the surface of water and casting light on the boulder. “By tomorrow morning, I’d wager.” Then, the pieces click together. I narrow my eyes. “Why?”

I can hear the forced nonchalance in her voice. “No reason.”

I sigh. She really should have been more careful with her rationing. “Rumil and I will share water with you.”

Rumil protests at the same time Cosima calls out her thanks. I leave them to their good-natured bickering and return my full focus to guiding my horse and my company.

A slight movement registers in the corner of my eye. “Draw arms!”

I unsheathe my sword and swing it to the right just in time to stop the arrow finishing its flight to my youngest brother. I block another one aimed at my neck. I hear Orophin and Baranor free the swords at their hips, as well as Rumil hurriedly instructing Cosima to take the reins. She protests, likely not yet fully registering the attack, and I cover them as they argue. “Cosima, do as he says,” I call back. I need Rumil and his bow to take out the attackers on the hillside to our right. Orcs, likely.

My suspicions are confirmed when twelve of them descend from the peaks to our left and right, converging on us in the middle. Rumil has evidently persuaded Cosima to take control of Roch and has put his bow to good use, killing the orc that focused its fire on us from above. Sharp clangs and the shouts of battle create a chaotic cacophony that is all too familiar. I urge Faervel forward, cutting through the middle of an orc as I go. One chances a blow to my leg but before it can carry out the act, I sever its head from its neck. By my count, ten more to go.

Arrows rain from above, this time coming from our left. Alexander shouts, and I risk turning around to see if he’s been hit. Thankfully, he hasn’t — an arrow had only come relatively close to him. I have to remind myself how frightening this must be for humans who have never experienced an orc ambush, or even an orc. While unpleasant, an attack like this is part of the job for myself and my wardens — even Baranor, who frequently heals others on the battlefield. With that in mind, I cut down another orc and bring Cosima into view. She grips Roch’s reins with an intensity that turns her knuckles white and whips her head around, trying to keep all the beasts in her line of sight. It pleases me to see that she’s attempting to be observant, even if her already weak senses are untrained and thus dilute her efforts.

While Rumil focuses fire on the orcs attempting to fell us with arrows, an orc in the infantry rushes Roch. Cosima jerks the reins to the right, spurring him into movement. The motion catches Rumil’s attention, and, with deadly accuracy, he hits the orc in the eye. He turns his attention back to the skies, attempting to locate those that still assail us with arrows.

Concussions sound to my left — the beasts have dislodged a pile of rocks, trying to crush us. Faervel is an intelligent steed and dodges the boulders skillfully, allowing me to keep my attention on beheading one of the orcs who jabs towards my middle. As I kill another, the arrows cease falling from above—Rumil’s done his job, then.

Six orcs left.

Those remaining attempt to surround us. Can’t have that. I guide Faervel past the furthest beasts and then turn, swinging my sword, forcing them to fall back. From the rear of our line, Orophin follows my lead, blocking an orc’s blow and returning it with a fatal one. Baranor rears his horse to narrowly avoid being knocked off by an axe. I tighten my jaw. It is risky forcing the orcs into the middle when four of our company must share that space with them. I shake my head, firm in my original decision. It is less risky than allowing the orcs to encircle us.

Alex yelps and directs Baranor to an orc approaching them from behind, having snuck past Orophin. They keep coming. They must be hiding in the rocks. My youngest brother recognizes the urgency building at the back of our line and concentrates his close-range fire on those that attack there. He has also noticed the threat hiding in the rocks and kills the beasts as quickly as he can identify them.

The noises of battle are loud, but any experienced warrior knows it’s the quieter sounds—the ones out of place—that are the most important. A boot scuffs against stone and I raise my sword just in time to meet the massive orc that throws himself from the rock above me. We collide, falling to the ground. The impact knocks the breath from me and the colossal weight on my chest definitely doesn’t help. With my left hand, I retrieve my dagger, slicing towards the beast’s neck. He stops me with his sword, pressing the blade to my own throat. He’s strong, but I’m stronger. I push against him, using the leverage from my movement to flip us over and, before he can register the change, I plunge my blade into his gut.

A fiery sting shoots up my leg and I kick my uninjured foot, knocking the newcomer in the head. He falls to the ground, stunned by the blow, and I draw myself to full height. His rotting flesh squelches when I stab him in the chest. In the second I have before another beast attacks me, I check the weapon that sliced my leg. Not poisoned. Good.

A scream pierces the air.

Cosima.

I whip around, locating her quickly. She gasps, gripping below her left shoulder, staring at the blood between her fingers in shock. I switch my dagger to my dominant hand and throw it forward. Within a second, it is buried to the hilt in her assailant’s chest, and he falls to the ground with a thud.

A blow from behind sends me sprawling, and I catch myself just before my face collides with the dirt. Coughing violently, I twist, jabbing my sword under the orc’s chest plate and in between his ribs — a fatal strike. Mentally, I reprimand myself for getting so distracted, and let my eyes wander around our surroundings, checking for any enemies we have yet to eliminate. Only one remains, and Orophin ends its life with a deliberate slice to the gut. Everyone is alive and accounted for, thank the Valar. I run to them.

Cosima’s face contorts in pain — she’s gone sickly pale. Panic I didn’t feel during the attack sears through my chest. How much blood can humans lose before it is fatal? “How badly are you hurt?”

“It’s just her arm,” Rumil answers for her, looking quite distressed himself. “It’s deep. I do not think the sword was poisoned, though.”

“You don’t think or you know? How sure are you?”  My voice is harsh—harsher than it needs to be, probably, and I try to de-escalate. I’m likely still fired up from battle.

Rumil sets me with an even gaze, nothing but honesty in his eyes. “I know. The sword was not poisoned.”

I nod, feeling my breathing begin to slow. “Good.”

Alexander calls worriedly from the edge of the group. “What happened? Is she okay? Cosima!”

“I’m fine,” she grits back. Her voice is scratchy, strained, so obviously speaking through the pain that it makes my stomach hurt.

But the pain will pass, I remind myself. But for now, I can’t say for sure if the threat has. And I need to be sure.

“Baranor,” I gesture to my friend. “Bind her wound so it is secure for travel. Orophin—search back and make sure we are not being followed. I’ll scout ahead.”

Before turning to leave, my eyes seek Cosima’s of their own accord. Hers are tight, squinted against the pain I’m sure she’s not used to feeling. In them I see so much fear—terror, even—and I feel resolve settle within me. An attacker won’t get an opportunity like that again.

I pull my gaze away. There’s still work to do.

{***}

Thankfully, no orcs hide ahead. Though I am reluctant to leave the group for long, I spend a handful of moments retracing the trail our attackers took. It leads to a shallow, empty cave and an abandoned fire pit. Just to be safe, I stomp the pit under Faervel’s hooves. That will discourage other orcs from sheltering here.

In this rare moment of privacy, I roll up the edge of my right legging, assessing the injury to my leg. It’s shallow, just a slice, really, and the sting is minor enough that I’ve nearly forgotten about it. Satisfied that it’s not serious, I decide to wait to have Baranor look at it until we’re settled for the night. Right now, my top priorities are Cosima’s wound and getting moving again. Now that we’ve encountered a pack of orcs, I am even more eager to reach the safety of Imladris.

I ride back to where I left the others, arriving not long after Orophin. No orcs on his end, either. Good. I dismount, leaving Faervel in Rumil’s care and join Baranor where he crouches on the ground next to Cosima. Behind her, Alexander paces anxiously.

Baranor smoothes a salve over the torn skin. It seems he’s already cut away the excess cloth of her tunic sleeve and cleaned her wound. Part of me is grateful I was gone for it—by the haggard look on Cosima’s face, it can’t have been a pleasant experience. Like Rumil said, the wound is deep. Orcs don’t typically use well-crafted weapons, and this one was no different—a jagged blade had been used to injure Cosima, possibly an old knife or a scrap piece of metal fashioned into a rudimentary sword.

I raise my eyes to hers and find her already looking at me, watching my expression intently. Looking for signs that she should be worried, probably. I say a quick prayer of thanks to the Valar for my natural stoicism that gives nothing away and for our safety. Then, I address my obviously shaken friend. “Baranor is one of the best healers in Lothlórien. The cut looks frightening and hurts, but it will heal.”

She nods, keeping her jaw tightly clenched.

My heart aches. I look to Baranor, at a loss. His bedside manner comes much more naturally, and he gives an easy smile as he wraps a clean bandage around Cosima’s upper arm. “There, that will do the trick until we reach Imladris. I want to redress it tonight though, and again in the morning. I’ve used some of my power to aid the healing process begun by the salve—we’ll see where it’s at tonight. Don’t you worry my dear friend.”

Cosima bobs her head again, murmuring her thanks to our healer. The look on her face—stricken, fearful, pained—both hurts me and draws attention to the steadily growing guilt. I should have been faster. I should have looked out better. I should have—

I jerk my head to the side, trying to free myself from these thoughts. As leader of the group, all faults are mine. But dwelling on that now won’t keep us safe, so, for the time being, I stand, gesturing for the others to do the same. “We should get going. I don’t want to lose more time.”

Rumil nods and hands me Faervel’s reins, reaching down to help Cosima stand. I hear him whisper a heartfelt apology to her, sounding as if he feels just as much guilt as I do.

She waves it off, wincing when she moves her injured arm. “It’s not your fault. I’m okay.”

But her voice sounds fragile, devoid of the liveliness that characterized it this morning. Rumil also notices the change in our friend and is extra gentle when he grips her foot to lift her onto Roch’s back.

Something pricks at the edges of my mind, bothering me. “No.” I hear my voice ring out over the silence. I’m met with five pairs of questioning eyes. I clear my throat, hastening to gather my thoughts. “Rumil, I want you to guard the back with your bow. I’ll take Cosima on Faervel so you can focus on shooting if there’s another attack.”

Seeing the logic in this, Rumil nods, releasing Cosima and mounting Roch alone, leading the horse to the back of our company. As Alexander passes to join Baranor, he takes Cosima’s hand in his, squeezing. She gives him a tired-looking smile then walks to join me at the front of the group.

Automatically, I kneel, locking my hands together as I wait for her foot.

She hesitates. “No orcs in Imladris?”

I hold her gaze, wanting her to see the honesty in my eyes. “No orcs in Imladris.”

She swallows and places her boot in my hands. “Good. Let’s get going, then.”

I help her up, taking the opportunity to assess her face. The fear remains, but it is now eclipsed by a hardness, a determination. She’s putting up a wall. I know. I’ve been there.

But there’s nothing we can do about it now. We’re still in the orc-infested mountains and we need to reach safety. So, I grip Faervel’s mane and pull myself in front of Cosima. I give the order and we continue our journey.

A/n Thanks for reading! Likes, comments, and reblogs are the best :) Let me know if you would like a tag! And if you’re having trouble being tagged, try subscribing on Ao3. That will notify you automatically when I post there!

|next part|

|masterlist|

Tolkien tag list: @anangelwhodidntfall @eru-vande

Double Heart tag list: @lainphotography @fangirl-nonsense @themerriweathermage @thophil2941btw @kenobiguacamole @wishingtobeinadifferentuniverse @from-patroclus-with-love @boywivlove @tolkien-apologist @ordinarymom1 @sam-was-the-true-hero @sweet-bea-blossom @moony-artnstuff

**Strikethrough means Tumblr won’t let me tag you**

[awkbo0b]

Two of a Kind:2

A/N: Thanks for everyone who is reading and thank you for the notes! I havent been active on tumblr for a while but being able to come on here and post an idea I have for a fanfic and having people actually like it warms my heart.

Summary of the first part: Mae is visiting her cousin, Tony, in Outer Banks and little does Mae know, she just ran into JJ! Here’s there link for Two of a Kind:1 if you havent read it yet.

Warnings: underage drinking, usage of drugs, swearing

~~

I join Tony who is now with a group of girls near the fire. “Hey! Hope I didn’t miss much of the party.” I mention as I take a drink of my beer. The girls all smile at me and begin to introduce themselves. I didn’t bother remembering their names since I probably won’t see them again after tonight. The conversation drifts about boys that they go to school with, who they all have crushes on, and some of their plans for the summer. I turn to look at the water to notice that some people have gone swimming. I smile to myself thinking about how beautiful it is here. 

“And Mae here is an unique artist,” my attention is pulled when I hear Tony mention my name, “ she is able to turn anything into a complex drawing. It’s truly amazing.”

I smile, “Honestly though, you should see Tony’s photos.” I try to turn to conversation away from me. As much as I love my art, talking about it isn’t something I enjoy. “She normally does landscapes like her parents, but if you put a model in front of of her,” I puff my cheeks and let out a whistle, “it’s breath taking what she can do.” as I compliment Tony I notice her tuck her hair behind her ear. “No need to act bashful T!” I exclaim. Tony raises her nose a little higher, showing her confidence. “If you haven’t seen her work yet, you are really missing out.” I finish off my beer.

“Tony, I knew you painted but how come you never mentioned photography?” The girl standing on the other side of Tony ask, she has pin straight, black hair, and is wearing glasses that look like they are from the 20′s fashion era. I glance at Tony already knowing what she is going to say.

“Well I mean, my parents both are photographers. They capture such unique angles in landscapes. And it kinda feels weird to follow in their foot steps that closely. Look at Mae,” Tony throws her arm in my direction, “her parents are sculptors and she paints and draws. Different medias.” Tony’s word slur together as she speaks.

The girl with black hair give Tony assuring smile that she understands, “I get it, girl.” Her words also slurring together then pulling Tony in for a hug. The sudden wave of emotion fills the small circle.

“Well, before I join in on the touchy feeling stuff, I’m going to grab another beer.” I inform once Tony pulls away.

“I think I better give myself a minute.” Tony hiccups and then raises her bottle, “Once I’m finish with this one of course.” The girls around us giggle and Tony does too.

“Alright dude, I’ll be back.” I make my way towards the coolers. I notice a group of people sitting on a log near the water. A small lantern is lit. I notice blondie and three others, two boys and a girl. As I continue to watch, being the creepy people watcher that I am, I begin to see that they are passing around a joint or blunt. Whatever it is, they are smoking weed.

Once I reach the coolers I come up with an idea. I grab two bottles instead of one and then turn towards blondie and his group. They are all talking and laughing at things that are said as I approach. Blondie, who is sitting on the end, shoots his head up first, then the girl who i can now see has longer curly hair. She offers a friendly smile.

“Hey, you don’t look familiar, Are you a tourist?” The girl ask, then the other two boys look in my direction too. Just as I am about to introduce myself blondie cuts in.

“She’s rude, that’s what she is,” Blondie has a playful smirk on his face. I laugh at the comment.

“I guess I’m technically a tourist, but I wouldn’t consider myself rude.” I wink towards blondie as he take a hit from the blunt, causing him to cough.

“Whoa dude, you’re coughing? who even are you?” says one of the boys as he laughs taking the blunt from blondie and takes a hit. He is wearing an unbutton shirt with a bandanna tied loosely around his neck. His hair has intense volume that would make any girl jealous.

“Shut the fuck up, just inhaled wrong.” blondie mutters still trying to catch his breathe. “And even if you are somehow not rude,” blondie’s voice still strained from the coughing but is now talking normal, “what brings you over here?” He questions me. The blunt continues down the row of friends, ending with the guy with dark chocolate skin.

“Was wondering if I could take a couple hits with you?” my voice ends with a little squeak, a littler nervous as to how blondie will react. All three friends are looking back and forth between us. I let out a small laugh. “I brought a truce,” I hold out the extra bottle of beer towards blondie.

“Hmm,” blondie pulls his hand up to cup his chin to appear as if he is really thinking hard on this one. I bite my lip starting to feel a little awkward. “Mae was your name right?” Blondie takes the bottle from my hand and pants the empty spot next to him,

“Yes, yes it is blondie.” I sit down and the friend from the end passes the blunt to me.

“For the love of god,” blondie places his elbows down on his thighs, shakes his head then looks my way, “please call me JJ.” JJ winks as I take my hit from the blunt.

“JJ it is then.” I try to say in a flirty tone. Everyone laughs and then begins to introduce themselves. I try my hardest to remember these names, because deep down I would want to see them again.

~

We finished the blunt, the boy with the crazy hair, who i think is John B, claimed he could roll the next one. Kie, the girl, and Pope, the one with chocolate brown skin, laugh at John B as he struggles.

“Come on man. I can do this shit with my eyes closed.” JJ moans throwing his hands up in the air. Another round of laughter roars from us. I remembering that I came here with Tony, who was at her drinking limit when I last saw her about  forty-five minutes ago. I look towards the bonfire to see her white dress almost glowing from the moon light. She is dancing with her group of girls, clearly have a good time. “How do you know the misfit kook?” JJ’s voice startles me, even though it was only loud enough for me to hear.

“What do you mean misfit? She seems to be fitting in fine to me.” I look towards JJ genuinely confused as to what he was meaning.

“She moved here two years ago, most of us have been here our whole lives. The kook life style is passed down from generation to generation. People who move here with kids, don’t normally end up fitting in.” JJ explained.

“I feel like I am a perfect example of that.” Kie raises her hand. “I’ve lived here for a while but never seemed to fit in, so here I am with the pogues. Plus the kook life style is too much for me.” Kie scrunches her face in disgust. I nod taking in what both of them are saying. 

“She’s my cousin, and my best friend. And I guess I’m kinda getting at what you guys are saying, but we might need to go over it again when I’m sober.” I let out a laugh, and so does everyone else.

“I like this girl.” Pope says.

“Isn’t your family some kind of artist?” John B ask.

“How would you even know, dude.” JJ sneered, earning himself the middle finger from John B.

“I think I remember Sarah mentioned it, dick head.” John responds.

“Actually yes, we are. It kinda runs through the family.” I state.

“Oh yeah, your family is the Clemonds right?” Kie ask almost jumping off the log, “my dad has some of Sadie Clemonds photos in our restaurant!”

“Yep, that’s the family name.” I give Kie a smile.

“Hold up, your whole family is just filled with artist?” JJ ask not believing it.

“Yeah, in some way, shape, or form.” I giggle.

“You’re parents are Chloe and Trenton right?” Kie is now standing she is so excited.

“Yes ma’am,” I answer.

“I would love to see their work sometime”

“I can help arrange that,” I raise my hand to give Kie knuckles.

~

A/N Hey guys thanks again for all the notes on the first part! I am adding in my author notes for the 3rd part as you read this! I guess this is a good time to say that there will be a slow burn between Mae and JJ. So I hope you all stick around long enough to see it! I’ll be adding a tag #TwoOfAKind to this one so it will be easier to find it.

This might be a little odd but if you guys have any questions about my characters ask them and i can go into more detail about it in the net part! Also if you have any request for something to happen I’m all ears!

Thanks again for reading and for all the notes, 3 part should be up soon. Please continue to like/reblog. Love you all! 

UPDATE: I HAVE MOVED THIS FANFIC TO WATTPAD, HERE IS THIS LINK! LOVE YOU ALL THANK YOU FOR TE NOTES!

[reeree1500]

The Return- Part 11

Im backkkkk💕 Hey yall so after a very very longgggg break from writing😅😬 I am officially back💕 I wanted to say thank you to everyone who reached out to me for their support and their love💕☺️ I am currently working on finishing up this series for yall as well as some smutty😏 requests that have been sent in. And I just wanna say that I love all of yall and yall are the best people out there💕💕💕💕💕💕

Disclaimer: Some Angst, Some Fluff and my horrible writing as always💕 Hope yall enjoy💕

Taglist: @yanii-the-hippie @oceans-daughter-3 @camatsuru @youbloodymadgenius @calum-hoodwinked-me @cutegyrl927 @readsalot73 @blonddnamedhandz @hallowed-heathen @pinkrockstar19 @ivarthethiccness @zuxiezendler @thejulietfarciertlove @supernaturalvikingwhore @ifihadwings128 @paintballkid711 @affection-rabbit @mel0nch0ly @queenofallthyfandoms @limbo-limbo-limbo @biss-stuff @funmadnessandbadassvikings

Lemme know if you want to be a part of my permanent taglist as well, so I know who to include in the one shots☺️💕 

-------------------------------------------------

Recap:

Taking a deep breath I go to stand up from the bed in order to fetch a bucket of water and some new clothes. Instead I end up on the floor cradling my belly, with a burning sensation in my chest and blood pouring out from my mouth. “(Y/n)! Mama!” I can hear the shouts around me. “Fetch the doctor! Now hurry!” The voices around me begin to fade and not before long I can feel myself drifting away.

“My baby... Save my baby...” And with that everything turns pitch black...

-----------------------------------------------------

Ivar’s POV

It seemed like time and everything around me stilled. What had started as a very awkward and unpleasant evening, had become even worse. Just a few steps away from me, (Y/n) had collapsed and I wanted nothing more than to rush to her aid and lift her up in my arms so that I could whisper that everything would be okay. That our son would be fine, because he was a fighter and he was OUR SON! That this was all a nightmare and that I would not rest till whoever was responsible would be put to death by my hands! But how could I? How could I be that person she needed the most when all I had done was bring her pain and sorrow. 

I hand single handedly destroyed her life and her family. It wasn't until I saw her there. Laying down on the mattress as cold as ice that it dawned on me. All the hurt and pain that I place the people I love through... 

“Ivar? Are you alright my love?” Said Freydis as she knelt down before me, whilst placing her hands on my knees. My hands that once rested on the arms of the chair I was in, grasped on to her arms. I lifted my gaze to meet hers with the iciest stare that I could muster. “Do...Not...Touch...Me...Whore. I want nothing to do with you, for I know that somehow you're involved in this. And when I find out how, I will not hesitate to end your life!” I said through gritted teeth, whilst I pushed her down on to the floor. “My king, my god, I have nothing to do with this I assure you! Please you must believe me!” She pleaded with me whilst trying reach for me again. I only stared at her and said nothing back for I would not be able to contain myself from killing her. 

Shifting my gaze away from her I stare at the mattress in the middle of the room. Were (y/n) and Erik lay. Both pale, but you could tell that Erik was not in as bad of a shape as (y/n) was, as he had some colour to his skin. I could see Freydis from the corner of my eyes, lifting herself up and trying to come towards me. This idiot does not give up. I quickly turned my icy glare towards her and she stopped dead in her tracks. Bowed and slipped away from the room.

Her eyes told me everything I needed to know. They showed guilt, anger, even happiness, perhaps at the fact that the only person that has ever loved me for me was dying, but the one thing that showed the most was remorse. And that single handedly told me that she was involved. Freydis was not smart enough to do this on her own, so there must have been someone else pulling the strings. And I would not rest until I found out who!

-----------------------------------------

Your POV

Fluttering my eyes open, I start to notice the familiar surroundings around me. The fireplace’s light radiating across the entire room. Marjorie’s little body at the foot of the bed sound asleep and Erik’s little body hugging her’s closely as if he was protecting her from anything. Erik! At that thought I try my hardest to lift myself off the bed to check on my baby boy, but am stopped by him. “Surely, you're not thinking about getting up, are you now? We both know that’s probably one of the stupidest things you could do in your condition.” Ivar said from the chair he was in. He looked like he hadn't slept in days, maybe even weeks. His hair was disheveled and his eyes held something to them that I couldn't quite put my finger on. 

I tried to form words, but couldn't quite find the right one’s. Ivar stood up from the chair and used his crutch as support to lift himself off the chair and walk towards the bed in the middle of the room. “I..var, what happened? Erik.. h..he was...”  I trailed off before the tears streamed down my face. “Shhhh... It’s alright. Don’t cry, I’ll explain everything that’s happened, but please do not cry. I cannot bear to see you in tears, love.” Ivar said while wiping the tears of my face with his thumbs as he sat down beside me. As Ivar took my hand in his, he recounted everything that had occurred in the last 2 weeks to me. 

Freydis had been escorted back to Kattegat by Ivar’s guards, he did not tell me why, but I could tell that it was something serious by the way his demeanour changed. Bjorn and Hvitserk were set to sail back as well sometime this week as they had treaties and business to attend to in Ivar’s behalf. Who was keen on not leaving my side till I awoke and Erik was back to full health. “And Arthur? Where is he?” I whispered, noticing the children about to wake up. At that Ivar takes a deep breath in and with an exasperated sigh... “He’s gone (y/n). He left a note about a week ago. He said that being here at your side wasn’t his place anymore, that the children and you would always have a place in his heart. And not to worry, that he was not going to revoke the children’s titles. But...” Ivar said looking down at our intertwined hands. For a moment I could see genuine sadness and guilt in his eyes, he looked back at the children and then he looked directly into my eyes. The eyes that I had tried so long to forget. The eyes that brought me comfort, safety and most of all the love that as much as I tried to deny it, he could only give me. “He divorced you (y/n)...” 

Before I could even get the chance to process what Ivar was telling me, I felt two pairs of arms wrap around me. “Mama! You're awake!” Cried out Marjorie. “Oh my babies! Im so sorry, I will never ever leave your sides again do you hear me?” I say to both Erik and Marjorie as I look into their eyes and wrapped them in a bear hug. I can feel Ivar’s stare from where he is sitting and before I realize what Im doing, I pull him in to the hug by the shirt he was wearing. “I cant... breathe...” said Erik from underneath mine and Ivar’s arms. At that we all let out a small laugh and let go of our family hug. “Erik are you feeling alright? Are you sick? We should probably get the doctor. And you should be in bed mister not out of it!” I say once it dawns on me that my son was almost poisoned, and here he is acting as if nothing had happened. “Calm down (y/n), he's alright I had the best doctors taking care of him while you were, you know.” Ivar says as he rubs my back in a soothing way. “Yeah Mama! Uncle Ivar...I mean Papa took care of me and Marjorie whilst you were sleeping, he never once left my side even though he probably should have, he looks terrible.” Erik says as he whispers the end of his sentence making me and Marjorie laugh. Ivar just stared at him not knowing how to reply to Erik. “Rude.” Is all that Ivar said before plopping down next to me on the bed, making us all laugh harder. I could see Ivar playing as if he were hurt by Erik’s statement, but his eyes told me how astonished he was at the fact our little boy was just like him, not to mention the fact that I could tell Ivar was dying of laughter on the inside. 

Moments later as the children are telling Ivar and I what they had done during the week. There’s a knock at the door. Marjorie and Erik go to answer it, as they noticed that Ivar had fallen asleep with his head on my lap and he hasn't slept at all during the last 2 weeks. “Well if it isn't, my beautiful niece and my handsome nephew. Eh! How’s your papa, is he still brooding and acting all grumpy in the corner of the room?” Hvitserk says with a grin on his face that stretches ear to ear. “Nope! He’s sleeping on mama’s lap you see.” Marjorie says as she points toward us from Hvitserk’s arms. “(y/n), you're awake!” He says putting Marjorie down and running towards the bed and throwing himself on it. Ivar’s hand shoots out and grabs Hvitserk’s throat. “Don’t.” He says before letting go and going back to sleep, as he places his upper body across my legs. “And were back to normal people!” Hvitserk as he laughs while hugging me and kissing my forehead.

 “So how are you feeling? How was it actually? Wait you must me insanely hungry, good thing I had your cooks make a feast!” As Hvitserk went on and on asking questions and me trying to answer them to the best of my ability I start to think about my family and what the future holds for us especially now since I’ve lost my best friend. And Im not 100% forgiving Ivar just yet, but I cant help but feel that this is how it was meant to be. Ivar and I listening to the ramblings of Hvitserk and our children and one of us drifting away while the other smiled and nodded. The thought brought a huge smile to my face, and a feeling that I could never forget nor want to disappear. The feeling of Family.

---------------------------------------------------

After a couple of days I still wasn't back 100%, but I couldn't just stay locked up in a room. Ivar protested all he could, but he knew that I would not stop until I got what I wanted. As I made the trek from the castle to the cliff I could see the ocean and how calm and serene it looked. The birds flocking from one place to another and the sun setting in the distance. The view was breathtaking. “You know considering you just got poisoned, you shouldn't be out and about by yourself.” Bjorn said as he approached me at the edge. “I know, but I just needed a moment to myself. To think about things and wrap my head around this mess.” I said pulling the shawl a little tighter around myself, to shield me from the ocean’s breeze. “Here, take this.” Bjorn said as he placed his fur around my shoulders. “I thought I lost you for good (y/n). Those 2 weeks where we didn't know if you would awake, took me to a dark place that I haven't gone too since before you came back into my life...” Bjorn whispered as he looked out towards the sun set. “Bjorn, I’m a horrible person. I can’t stop thinking about how this is the life I was meant to live. Just me, my kids and Ivar. What about Arthur? He was such a big part of my life and I...” 

“You can’t help, but feel guilty. Guilty that was you shared wasn't meant to be, that secretly you hoped for this day all your life? Free from what seemed like a burden?” He says as he sitting down and twiddling with the laces on his boots. “Yes... But he wasn't a burden, he was my friend, my best friend. He was there for me when Ivar wasn't, he took care of me.” I choke out through sobs as I fall on my knees next to him. “I know, but you cant help who you love (y/n) and who you do not. At the end of the day you would have held this in and it would've ate away at you, for Odin knows how long.” Bjorn says wiping away my tears and kissing my forehead. “God I hate you sometimes, you know that?” “Nope, you loveeee me.” We say as we laugh together whilst we lay down on the grass looking up at the stars as the night took over. “(y/n), although you're not technically my sister. I want you to know that no matter what I’ll always be with you and that I love you.” Bjorn says without looking at me. “I know...I love you too, big brother.” I take his hand in mine to show him that nothing has changed between us and that no matter what he’ll always be my big brother.

 Standing up we make our way back to the castle, but before we go in I stop him. “Bjorn, when is the boat departing to Kattegat, again?” “In 4 days time, why?” He asks with a worried look on his face. “Let’s say that I’ll be joining you, 4 years is long enough to be away from home.” I say looking up at him, with a hard look on my face. “I’m not one to stop you, but are you sure that’s what you want?” He says with a worried look. “Believe me, its what I want and what I will do.” 

I had gone too long being afraid of the retaliation that Floki would take against me, but I knew that he had orchestrated this poisoning, for he wanted me dead. However, he had not only messed with me, but with my son and no one touches my children. This time I would not return to Kattegat a scared little girl. I would return as a mother, who would protect her kids and her family at all costs and this time I would not be the one sent away, for I would stay in Kattegat and nothing and no one would get in my way...

[shield-sheafson]

Chapters: 3/? Fandom: Teen Titans (Comics), Teen Titans - All Media Types Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Raven/Tara Markov, past Tara Markov/Slade Wilson, Background Dick Grayson/Koriand'r Characters: Tara Markov, Raven (DCU), Donna Troy, Koriand'r (DCU), Slade Wilson Additional Tags: Fluff and Angst, Romance, Past Underage, Past Abuse, Flirting, Weddings, sexually charged lipstick application, Slade doesn’t show up in the present timeline he’s just in the flashbacks, Flashbacks Summary:

Even normal things feel like they’ve been ruined: it’s been years, but sometimes Tara feels like she’s still with Slade. As everybody prepares for Dick and Kory’s wedding, all kinds of miserable feelings begin bubbling up inside of her even as she tries to have fun. To add to the stress, Raven has been acting awfully cute lately…

—

“So what’s the dress situation here?” Tara asks casually.  “Donna had bridesmaid dresses picked out by this time.  Are you slacking?”  To be perfectly fair, Tara had never worn the ruffly monstrosity Donna had given her.  She’d been too busy wandering the streets as an amnesiac.

“Tamaranians usually do not have bridesmaids,” Kory says.  She’s carefully weaving together circlets of dried flowers.  She has a pile of completed ones in the middle of the dining room table.  “Everybody participates, not just a few people.  I can not pick out matching dresses for the entire Justice League.”

“Just let Gar take care of it.”

“Do you want Gar dressing you?” Kory asks, quirking an eyebrow.

“…Good call. You seem pretty calm about all this.  Donna is going crazy.”

“Donna will relax in time.  She seems to think I want an Earth wedding.  With the DJ.”

“What do you want?”

“On Tamaran, we sing, we dance, and we burn things.  That is all I want; it would be nice to have G'larbac feathers and a torba bowl, but I do not need them to be happy.  Oh, and Dick is not allowed to speak.”

“…Nice.”

Kory puts down her flowers. “It is not as if I am not participating in the human traditions myself!  He is not allowed to look at me and everybody will throw grain.  We will do the bouquet and the garter.  I respect humans!”

“It’s– I wasn’t saying you didn’t!”  Tara isn’t ready to fight.  “…Wait, who said you didn’t?”

“I know that it is selfish to want to bring Tamaran to Earth,” Kory says, looking down at the table.  “I try to be respectful of human behavior, even when it makes me a little uncomfortable.  I do not kiss on the lips to do greeting and I laugh at the sarcasm.  But my wedding is special.  Earth is my home now, but Tamaran is where I was born.  I went to weddings when I was a little girl, and I played at them with my friends.  I want to at least have a little of that here.”  She keeps her chin high and proud, but there’s a hurt look in her eyes.

Tara isn’t sure what to say.  She’s never been any good at comforting people; if anything, she usually makes things worse.  Does Kory even need comfort right now?  She just nods her head awkwardly.

“That’s fair,” she says.  “I don’t think it’s selfish to miss where you grew up. I mean, it’s not like this is someone else’s wedding, so it’s nobody’s business how you do it, right?”

“But the guests will all be human.  Dick’s father will be there.”

“He’s rich, he doesn’t care.”

“What does that have to do with…?”

“Shh.  He’s rich.”

“I met him, he seemed to think…”

Tara leans forward and puts a finger on Kory’s lips.  “Shh.  Wealthy.”

Kory seems to accept.

—

“Fast or slow?” Gar asks, resting his chin on his hands and leaning over the table.

“Both,” Donna says.  

“Song decade?”

“Well, Kory wants Tamaranian folk music, and Dick wants pop from the ‘70s, so multiple.”

“How many dances are we going to have?  Parents’ dances, bridal party dances, anniversary dances?”

“This is complicated enough without all that stuff,” Vic says.

“Aww, embarrassed?” Tara asks.  “Scared of the boogie man?”

“That’s lame,” Gar says.  “Even I think that’s lame.”

“Kory’s parents can’t make the voyage,” Donna says.  “And Dick’s father is single, so the parents’ dance might be awkward.  I’m thinking we can arrange it so that Dick and Kory dance first.  I’ll hire a choreographer.  Then the brides’ and grooms’ parties can go, and then maybe the couple that’s been together the longest, so I’ll check the guest list and–”

Tara coughs. “That’s stupid,” she says, thinking back to her earlier conversation.  “Maybe everyone can just dance.”

“She’s one of my best friends, and I want it to be perfect,” Donna says.  “She and Dick have helped me so much all these years, so I want to help them back.”

“Still sounds like too much,” Vic says.

“Come on, it sounds fun!” Gar says.  He punches Vic in the shoulder with a clanging noise.  “We can teach you if you don’t know how.”

“I know how to dance,” Vic says, but his expression says more.  He presses his lips tightly together.

“Okay,” Gar says, standing up.  “Prove yourself.”

Tara snorts.

“You too,” Donna says, joining Gar.  “If we make Vic do it, we all have to.”

Suddenly, it doesn’t seem as funny.  While the idea of Vic being a bad dancer is amazing and wonderful, Tara isn’t able to dance either.  She’s been coasting.  This is karma.

“I’ll pair off with Vic, so it’s you and Gar,” Donna says, switching on the radio on the counter.  It’s Lionel Richie.

“Is this okay?” Gar asks quietly as he takes her hand.  “I’m not being weird, right?”

Tara rolls her eyes.  “We’re not sixteen anymore.  I think you’ve got your teen horniness under control.”

“Right.”

Off to the side, Donna and Vic are swaying awkwardly.  He looks terrified.

“Okay, do you remember how to do a box step?” Gar asks, nervously resting his hand on Tara’s back.

“Yeah,” she says, even though she’s not sure what a box step is.  She carefully mirrors his feet.

“You don’t remember,” Gar says.  “Okay, put your right foot back.”

Which foot is the right foot?  Tara makes a wild guess.  Gar shakes his head sadly.

“Hey, Raven!” Donna calls.  Tara looks over Gar’s shoulder and sees Raven shuffling sleepily into the kitchenette with messy hair and her blanket dragging behind her.

Raven looks up groggily.  “What are you doing?” she asks.

“Dancing,” Gar says.  “Vic’s low self-esteem is getting in the way of his social skills.  Tara, you aren’t supposed–”

“Hey!” Vic interjects.  “My self-esteem is fine!”

“Join the party!” Donna says.  “I think we need to switch up anyway.”

Raven squints at her, takes the kettle off the stove, and pours some hot water into a mug.

“I’m going with Gar next,” Vic says, letting go of Donna and stepping off to the side.  “Tara’s gonna be unpartnered.”

“But I’m right–” Donna begins.

“Unpartnered,” Vic repeats, looking meaningfully at Raven.  Raven presses her lips together and looks away.  

“This is stupid,” she says.  “I’m not playing.”  Tara feels a twinge of sympathy. She’s not entirely sure what’s going on, but Raven is embarrassed and Vic’s making it worse.

“Donna knows how to lead, right?” Tara asks.  “Because I only know how to… The thing that isn’t leading.”

“I’d better know,” Donna says.  “If I don’t know how to lead, then Kory’s going to be in trouble, because we’ve been practicing for weeks.”

Weird.  Kory always struck Tara as the type who would lead in a dance.  Maybe it’s just because she’s tall.

“Wait,” Raven says.  “I’ll try.”

“Man, talk about wishy-washy,” Tara says, but Raven, with unprecedented confidence, steps up to her and grabs her hand.

“You’re wishy-washy,” Raven mumbles, resting her hand on Tara’s back (electricity shoots up her spine).  

The music changes– something poppy and banal.  Raven swallows and moves carefully, and Tara, somehow impressed by her determination, follows as well as she can.

It feels very different from dancing with Gar– when she was younger, Gar excited a kind of nervousness in her that he doesn’t now (even though it wasn’t really a good feeling, it was a tangible one).  Being close to Raven is a whole new experience.  From the slender fingers that clutch Tara’s hand to the light sway of Raven’s dark hair to the smell of bitter black tea that lingers over her, Tara is oddly entranced.

Step in one direction, reverse, reverse again.  It should be so boring.  Tara can feel her heart pounding against the inside of her chest, either faster or slower than it should be.  She’s sure her hand is sweating.

“We’re going to turn in a circle now,” Raven says stiffly.

“Taking charge, I see.  Yay,” Tara says, bracing herself to either step on Raven’s foot or be stepped on.

“You’re doing a good job!”  Donna says.  Vic shoots her a look just as Tara loses focus and stomps Raven’s slipper, throwing her off balance.  They let go of each other, falling backwards a little.  

Raven takes a deep breath and turns around.  “Sorry!” she says, scurrying away before anybody else can interrupt.

After a few seconds of silence, Gar offers his opinion.  “That was kinda weird.”

“Freaky,” Tara says, still catching her breath.

—

“Fashion, fashion,” Gar chants.  He has one arm around Raven’s shoulder and one arm around Tara’s.

“It looks like you have a broken leg and we’re carrying you off the battlefield,” Raven says.

“He will have a broken leg if he doesn’t let go,” Tara says.

Gar lets go. “Can I still dress you up?”

“I’m not sure I could forgive you for doing something like that,” Raven says.  “You can dress Tara.”

“Hey!”

The consignment store is a small brick building in a strip mall alongside a drugstore and a Vietnamese restaurant.  It’s got a worn exterior and a variety of outdated clothes displayed in its streaky front window.

“Chic!” Announces the light-up sign by the glass door.  A bell rings as they open it and the sleepy clerk looks up from her counter.

“Welco– oh!” Her droopy eyes widen when she sees Gar.  “You’re one of the Titans, right?”

“Guilty as charged,” Gar says.  “Any heroes’ discounts available?”

“No,” Raven says before the clerk can answer.  “Let’s look at the books.”

“But you don’t even–”

Raven gently steers him away.  Tara follows.  She gives the clerk a little wave.

Gar stands around inattentively while Raven looks at something thick with a dusty cover.

“Wanna play the romance novel game?” Tara asks.  “You look at the ones on display and you count how many man-nipples you can spot.”

“Cowboy,” Gar says, pointing. “Upper-left corner.  Two nipples.”

“Kilt guy, bottom middle.  One nipple– maybe one and a half.”

“What are you doing?” Raven asks.

“Nothing wrong,” Tara says.  “Let’s go to the hats.”

They’re probably going to get lice, honestly.  If they just let anybody try on all these cloches, then chances are somebody covered in bugs has tried them on at some point.

“Hey, Gar,” she says.

“Mm?” He looks up from below the brim of a rhinestone-encrusted cowboy hat.

“Do you get lice, or do you get fleas?”

Just as Raven opens her mouth to deliver a scolding, Gar says, “Both.”

“Let’s go somewhere else,” Raven says, gingerly lifting the hat from Gar’s head.

Tara and Gar feel their way through the menswear section (they pet the faux-fur lining of a large and intimidating coat).  Gar’s eyes widen in excitement and he pulls out a shabby pink jacket with patches on the elbows.  He ducks down and begins covertly putting it on.

“There are dressing rooms,” Raven says.

“I look like a professor,” Gar says, standing.  His wrists poke out for a few inches and its bottom is well above his hips.

“Professor of being a bastard,” Tara says.

“It doesn’t fit,” Raven says.  “Also, Tara, stop being awful.”  Tara shrugs.

“I think it fits.”  Gar stretches his arms, pushing his wrists out further. “I’m gonna buy it.”

“I can’t control you,” Raven says.

“You know, that’s a really healthy way to approach your relationships with others,” Gar says thoughtfully as he takes the jacket off.  “Time to dress up Tara!”  He slaps a hand on her shoulder.

“I never agreed to this!  Ask Kory, she knows!”  Tara looks pleadingly at Raven, who just blinks at her like a cat.

They make their death march to the women’s section, Gar in high spirits, Tara in poor spirits, and Raven in some sort of spirits.  Tara drags behind, carefully examining every pointless thing she spots.

“Let’s get the Teen Bible,” she says.  “I really want that plush dragon.  Hey, we should…”

A silly, stupid thing.  There’s a pair of high-heeled slippers in the discount shoe bin.  The puffy feathers on the upper are clumped and ragged, and the color on the insole is worn down.

Tara stops dragging and walks a little faster.

—

A pair of pink mules with puffy faux feathers on the upper.  Tara bought them for ten bucks at the costume store (she’d also kind of wanted a Reagan mask, but she had no excuse).  She had an awkward, mincing walk when she tried them on. There was no strap around the back, so they were always on the verge of falling off.

They were another part of her grown-up costume.  She practiced walking in them in circles around her room for two hours, and hid them carefully when Gar knocked on her door looking for his rubber lizard.  She was determined to come off as mature that night.

“What do you think?” she’d asked, pointing to them proudly.

“You look cheap,” Slade said bluntly.  

Her stomach plummeted.

“It suits you,” he said.

She laughed.

—

Gar is in the dressing room.  He found a blouse, immediately labeled it as “bisexual” and scampered off.  Tara is staring at a pair of overalls, twisting the buttons of the left strap again and again. She wants it to come loose, even though Raven will probably make her take responsibility and buy the whole thing.

“What are you doing?” Raven asks from behind her.  Tara jumps.

“I’m ruining these overalls,” Tara says, turning to face her.  “I’ve almost got the thread worn down, see?”

“No,” Raven says, taking them from her.  “You suddenly got quiet and you’re making that face.”

“What face?”

“I know you, Tara.”

—

“I know you better than anyone. Don’t lie to me.”  He cradled her face gently as he said it, but all she could think of was how close his hands were to her neck.

—

“No, you don’t,” Tara says, reaching to take the overalls back.  “Stop acting like you can read my mind.”

Raven steps back, clutching them to her chest.  “You’re upset,” she says.

“I’m not.” Tara’s voice cracks a little.  “And even if I am, aren’t I allowed to be?”

Raven opens her mouth as if to say something, but she closes it again.  She looks down at the overalls.  The button is hanging down awkwardly.  “You’re allowed to be upset,” she says.  “But I hate it.”

Tara stretches her face into a sarcastic grin.  “All better!” she says.

Raven hands back the overalls without making eye contact.

“Come in and have a look!” Gar calls.

[ymnfilter]

He Found A Love [Klaine FF, One-Sided Sam/Kurt]

Summary: 

Set somewhere between Born This Way and Rumors. Sam is jealous that Kurt doesn't have a crush on him anymore and is in a relationship with klaine.

Sam had first noticed Kurt when he first entered the Glee Choir Room. It's not surprising. Kurt demands attention. Not in a way Rachel does, with her loud voice and questionable actions. Kurt demands attention silently. As if he knows all he'll have to do is exist and everyone will always just look at him. He dresses like he wants to impress the world, acts like royalty even when he thinks no one is looking at him. During the weeks Sam has spent in the school, he has never once seen Kurt Hummel's facade slip.

But back to the point, Sam noticed Kurt when he first performed in the choir room. Mostly because Kurt had been staring at him quite intently. But Sam hadn't known then, hadn't really thought much about the other boy's glasz eyes, paper-delicate skin, or pretty features. He had just turned his head slightly more to the left and found himself mesmerized with Quinn instead.

It was easier to pin his affections on her. Because Quinn was a her.

He should've known it wouldn't last, though. He spent most of his time, that wasn't being spent chasing Quinn, looking for Kurt, or staring at Kurt, or wanting to talk to Kurt. Kurt had one of the softest voices he had ever heard. At the same time, he also had the coldest tone. He could tear you to pieces just with a few words and then heal you back to health with even less.

And Sam soaked in the attention Kurt gave him. It might be slightly childish but Sam liked that Kurt liked him even if he was going out with Quinn. He was on the football team, had the head cheerleader as his girlfriend, and had the (beautiful) resident gay kid in love with him. It was like he was living in a teen rom-com.

Nothing could go wrong.

But then, well. Then Blaine happened.

Suddenly there was another boy for Kurt to dump his affections onto. And he seemed to like this Blaine kid even more than he liked Sam. He was positively smitten, and while the rest of the glee club might find it cute, all Sam could do was find it irritating.

Because now Sam couldn't look for Kurt and find him looking back at him. Now whenever Sam looked at Kurt, it was to find the other boy grinning at his phone.

He couldn't talk to Kurt without realizing that the softness of his voice was gone. The gentle tone of his voice was reserved for quiet phone calls to his boyfriend in front of his locker in the middle of hallways. Or the parking lot, or sometimes even the choir room.

Sam hated it, but he could tolerate it. And it was fine, because even when Kurt texted Blaine between classes, he had to look up from his phone at some point and look at Sam instead. And just because Kurt wouldn't talk softly to him anymore, doesn't mean Sam couldn't make him laugh with his mad impression skillz.

Yes. Skillz with a 'z'.

But then Finn invited everyone over for game night, and Sam had all this excitement contained in him. Excitement for some undivided time with Kurt (and the rest of the boys, but at least not Blaine) excitement for getting to talk to Kurt. Maybe if he made Kurt laugh enough, Kurt will start using the soft voice with him again. Sam was really just very excited.

And then all his excitement turned to shit when he rang the doorbell to the Hudson-hummel household and a completely unfamiliar boy opened the door.

Sam had never seen him before, but he knew who he was. And he hated him for it.

"Who're you?" Puck asked from behind him, and the boy smiled, all straight white teeth and crinkled laugh lines. He looked like a fucking showman. Sam hated him more.

"I'm Blaine. Kurt's boyfriend."

"Ah. You're the boy my boy is smitten with. I'm Puck. This is Sam, and this is Mike." Puck made the introductions as Blaine opened the door wider to let everyone in.

"It's nice to meet you all. Kurt talk about you. I hope you don't mind Finn inviting me for game night too."

Finn invited him? Finn? Sam felt betrayed. With the way Finn always rolled his eyes whenever Kurt brought Blaine up in conversation, Sam was sure Finn hated the guy. And now he's inviting him to sacred game nights?

"Nah man, the more the merrier." Mike said with a smile, and Sam wanted to gasp dramatically in outrage.

"But the real question is, are you any good?" Puck asked with a smirk.

"I board an all boys private school. Trust me when I say that before Kurt, video games were the only way I could spend my nights and stay sane."

Sam bristled. Before Kurt? How did he spend his nights now then?

Sam was about to open his mouth and say something that was no doubt offensive. Maybe something about the guy's crazy curly hair, or how no matter how dapper he looked or acted, it still wouldn't change that he was still at least half a foot shorter than Sam.

Thankfully, they reached the living room by then, and Sam's attention was completely directed towards Kurt, who was sprawled across the small love seat, his head on the cushion and legs dangling from the arm of the chair. Those beautiful eyes looked up from where he was reading some girly magazine and smiled at Sam (and the rest of the guys, but really at Sam.)

"Hey, Kurt." Sam said and casually took a seat at the front of the sofa closest to the one Kurt occupied. Hah. He inwardly cheered, where you going to sit now, Blainey boy?

"Hey Sam." he said and smiled and Sam preened. Kurt turned to the others, "Hey, you guys."

Sam was still smirking silently as the others answered the greeting, but it dropped pretty fast when he saw Blaine making his way to the love seat Kurt was laying on. There was no space. Where was he going to sit? On Kurt's stomach? But then, Kurt silently raised his upper body up a bit, and Blaine sat on the space cleared, only for Kurt to drop his head on Blaine's lap the next second.

No.

Sam looked around, no body was looking at the two of them. Why wasn't anyone looking at the two of them? Mike just put on the Call of Duty 3 CD of the play station and Finn casually passed the controllers to everyone, including Blaine.

Why wasn't anybody going to say anything about those two essentially cuddling with each other on sacred game night?

"Dude, where's your mom? I thought you said she had a day off?" Sam said after a while. It was to mostly serve as a distraction whilst he tried to shoot at Blaine as subtly as possible. Sure, it wouldn't be good for their team (Blaine was a good player, for someone who's gay) but it was the only thing Sam could do not to snatch Kurt's hand where it was lightly caressing the back of Blaine's neck.

But then again, maybe if Kurt's dad and Finn's mom were home, they wouldn't let their son and his boyfriend act so couple-y and cozy in the middle of the living room.

"She and Burt went grocery shopping. They should be back in a bit."

From where he was sprawled on the couch, Kurt pouted,

"I really wanted to go too. I heard there's a sale on sea food this week."

"Dude, you always grab stuff that no body's even heard of before. And you won't let Burt get the good beer." Finn said as an explanation.

"That's because I would really like my dad to hit his 90s." Kurt snapped back, and before Sam could say anything to back Kurt up, Blaine piped up,

"Maybe they just wanted to spend some alone time together. It is the weekend."

"Grocery shopping? They wanted to spend some alone time together grocery shopping, Blaine?" and Sam snickered. Mike looked at him weirdly for a moment but Sam payed him no mind.

"Hey, come on. You love getting groceries with me."

Kurt was silent for a moment, and Sam's heart dropped, because when Kurt spoke next, it was a whole new level of soft voice.

"Well yeah, but it's shopping with you." Blaine looked away from the screen to grin at Kurt, and on screen his avatar died. Sam killed him. No body noticed.

"I rest my case." Blaine mumbled, and Sam cursed himself for sitting so close, because from this distance, he could hear the awe in Blaine's voice. He could also hear a soft, pleased , almost silent hmm that Kurt let out as a response.

"Hey Kurt, how's the French homework going?" Sam blurted out the first thing that came out of his mouth. And it was a very reasonable thing to ask, in his opinion. After all, everybody knew French was Kurt's favorite subject in school, a school that he didn't share with Blaine. Sam couldn't have thought of a better conversation topic to freeze Blaine out. But it back fired. Again. Because of course it did.

"You don't take French, Sam?" Kurt asked him with an adorable head tilt. Sam's mind went into overdrive,

"Yeah, but my friend, Brett does. He told me that your teacher was kind of really dragging you all through the mud this week."

Kurt scoffed,

"Brett? You mean that boy that smells homeless? I would hardly expect him to enjoy a language as sophisticated as French. I have no idea why he's taking it if he finds even the basic tenses difficult."

Sam didn't know what to say to that, but apparently Blaine did,

"You guys are still on tenses? In your junior year?"

"The rest of the year is. I myself, am already quite fluent. But, I really wouldn't mind someone I could practice it with. I can only talk to myself so much in French."

"You do know that you have a boyfriend who's also fluent in French?" Blaine teased him, glancing at Kurt for a moment before going back to looking at the TV screen,

"You wouldn't mind doing that for me?"

"Of course not. I'll just hit you up whenever I'm studying it, and we can practice together."

How does Sam manage to kick himself so thoroughly?

Before Sam can say something that would inadvertently end up with Blaine and Kurt spending even more time together, he hears the lock of the main door turn, and Mrs.H's voice calling out a sweet we're home! to the boys. Blaine deliberately dies onscreen and both him and Kurt get up to help Mrs. H and Kurt's dad with all the bags. Sam feels like he should help to, but it's probably like his 2nd time at the Hudmel's , and he is predominantly Finn's friend (who himself is still playing) even though he'd much rather be here as Kurt's boyfriend, so the whole thing would probably just be super awkward,

"Oh, Blaine dear, I didn't know you were coming over today! I would've made some of that custard you like so much."

"I hope it's no trouble, Carol. Finn invited me to game night. Plus, dad's off to Costa Rico on business." Blaine grins, "As for the custard, I was hoping you could teach me. Just in case I start showing withdrawal symptoms."

Carol laughs, "Oh honey, if I taught you how to make the custard, I'm afraid we might just not see you again."

"Yes." Kurt drawls, good naturedly, "That's why Blaine's my boyfriend. Because of custard."

"Darn it, you figured me out." Blaine retorts, but pulls Kurt closer to press his lips to the other boy's temple.

"My, aren't you too just the cutest!" Carol sighs and turns to Kurt's father just as he's coming in through the garage, "Aren't they just the cutest, sweetie?"

"Yes. That's how I'm going to end up in the hospital again. Diabetes from my son's relationship." Burt grunts before turning to Blaine with a grin, "Hey, kiddo. Didja watch the game yesterday?"

"Hell yeah. Buckeyes won 25-11. It was awesome."

"Yer damn right, it was. You staying over for dinner?"

Blaine smiles cheekily, "If you don't mind."

"Of course not, we haven't seen you in a bit over a week."

"Yeah, school's been a bit rough. Mid terms are coming up."

And the conversation continues between the four members as they put away all the grocery. They sound like a regular family, with Blaine blending seamlessly with his boyfriend's parents. It's all Sam can do to not groan out loud. If Mr. And Mrs Hummel are so supportive of Blaine and Blaine and Kurt's relationship, Sam can't really see any way to break them up so that Kurt would pay attention to him again.

It's a childish thought anyway. Sam thinks. It's not like he wants to date Kurt anyway. Sam's straight. He is. It's just, attention and hero worship directed towards him is good for his self esteem, regardless of the gender of his admirer.

And Sam admires Kurt, Kurt is beautiful and strong and elegant to the point where it's almost regal. To have someone like that admire Sam had gone to his head way too fast.

And yeah, maybe watching Blaine and Kurt together hurts Sam's stomach a little. But he's pretty sure he'll get over it eventually. Maybe he'll skip some of the Hudmel house game nights from now on. It'll be a step in the right direction.

[creator-zee]

3

  Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. 

      Sweat dripped down my face and shoulders. My hair stuck to my face. Stones stabbed into my back from the wall I was cornered against. The hell beasts approached slowly closing in. My arms trembled as I struggled to keep my sword and shield up in front of me. Saliva dripped from the hell beasts mouths to the ground causing it to hiss as the acid touched it. 

      The first hell beast leaped at me. I raised my shield and knocked it to the side. Thud! Another hell beast knocked into me. I stumbled to the ground and let out a scream of pain as jaws clamped around my sword arm. My vision blurred as the venom made it through my system, but from my crumpled position on the ground I saw a figure surrounded by flames approaching. I blacked out as the cries of dying hell beasts filled my ears. 

     I blinked my eyes open and flinched from the bright light. Slowly I tried again and as my eyes adjusted I took in my surroundings. I was on a pile of straw with a bed roll on top in a stone room. In one corner a door appeared to lead to another room. I pushed myself up with my good arm noticing my right arm had been bandaged where the hell beast had bitten me. I was out of my armor but didn’t see it or my weapons anywhere. A figure appeared in the doorway and I struggled to my feet. 

     “You should be resting. A bite from a hell beast kills most people. You’re lucky my wife found you or you would be dead.”

      My very smart gay brain focused on possibly the least important detail that this strange woman had provided me with. “Wife?”

      The strange woman nodded as she made her way into the room towards me. “Yeah wife. You gotta problem with it?”

      I shook my head then stopped as it began to ache. “Nope no problem.”

      The woman gestured to the makeshift bed. “I suggest you get some more rest.”

     I gently lowered myself down into a sitting position. “Okay but first I want some answers.”

      The woman turned to go. “I’m sorry I am not the best person to ask you’ll want to ask my wife I’ll go get her.”

      Then she left and I sat counting the bricks in the wall. I didn’t even hear her until she spoke. “You have questions. I have answers, so ask.”

     Startled, I turned to her, “How did you get there?”

       “Walked.”

     I rolled my eyes. “Well duh. I suppose I meant how did you get there so quietly?”

     “Lots and lots of practice.”

  “Who are you?”

     “You can call me Alex. I’m a mercenary.”

     “What kind of mercenary can defeat 4 hell beats on her own?”

     “What kind of knight can’t?” Alex   retorted, avoiding an actual answer. 

     “Touché.” I shifted under Alex’s gaze as she continued to stare at me in silence. 

     Finally, she broke the silence, but not her gaze. “If your done asking questions, then let me ask one. What is a Knight of Life doing in a small town like this?”

     I paused before seeing no reason to withhold info I was after all in debt to this mysterious stranger. “I was with a troop of knights who were escorting Prince Leo to a Gala in the Kingdom of the Day and we were passing through this town to resupply for the final leg of the journey when hell beasts attacked and we were forced to flee. They chased me down though and I was separated from the rest of the guards whose first priority was protecting the prince.” 

     Alex shifted her stance slightly. “Look I don’t have the resources to accommodate you here but I have a friend who can help escort you back to the Prince while you heal.”

      “Really, that’s all I can ask for. Thank you for everything if you give me my things I can get out of your hair.”

     Alex nodded. “V will get your things while I go contact my friend”

     ‘V’ entered the room a short while later with my armor, sword, and shield. Everything appeared to have been cleaned and touched up. I thanked V and started putting my armor back on. The armor was made of leather reinforced in some spots with metal making it light and durable. The emblem of the Kingdom of Life was engraved on the front. My injured arm complained as I asked it to sheathe my sword. Until that bite heals I was going to be practically defenseless. At least I could hold a shield. With my sword and shield sling in my back I made my way out of the room and down a small staircase to the main room that had a fire in the middle. V was standing over it stirring a pot of soup.

      Right when I was about to announce my presence, Alex entered through the front door followed by another figure cloaked in shadows. The figure closed the door behind them and removed their hood dispelling the shadows that cling to their features.

     Alex stared straight at me. “Great you’re all ready to go. This is Z. And yes that’s her name. I would suggest you don’t ask questions.”

    I gulped nodding.

     Z gestures to the door. “Shall we get going we’re wasting night.”

     I nod and follow Z out the door. Once on the streets, Z pulls up their hood again and I almost lose them despite being a foot behind them. 

     Z’s voice drifts seemingly from nowhere. “The first mistake you and your little band of knights made was  traveling during the day. Hell beast can’t see for shit in the night but they can stare into the sun and not be affected.”

     Z seems a natural in the the dark but I struggle to see the path and finally I trip. I barely catch myself but I can hear Z’s disapproval in their voice. “Just try to keep up and not wake up the entire kingdom.”

     We don’t stop until the sun has cleared the horizon. Only then does Z turn off the path into the woods. They are still hard to see even in the daylight and I struggle to follow them through the thick woods. We reach a small clearing and Z finally comes to a stop. They remove their hood and I see their face in detail for the first time.

     “You have the mark of the night!”

     Z turns. “Sorry, the mark of what?”

     I gesture to the intricate black marking that starts on their forehead and stretches down the sides of their face down under their armor. “That marking on your face.”

     Z turns back to what she was doing on the ground. “Oh that. It’s just a tattoo not a ‘mark of the night’ I swear you knights are so superstitious. Willing to die for a prince but scared of spooky stories about far away kingdoms.”

     “Hey! The knights of life are an elite fighting force sworn to protect the royal family. It is considered a great honor to be counted among their ranks.”

    Z snorts. “Honor shmonor. Honor doesn’t buy you food or clothes or weapons. I’ll stick to deception any day if it gets me money to feed myself.”

     I sit down silently biting back my retort I couldn’t defend myself if I had to and they were helping me I guess I would just have to put up with them. 

     Z turns from the fire they building and faces me. “I’m going to go get us some food.” They pause by the edge of the clearing. “Stay... and don’t die.”

     I’m not particularly cold but the warmth from the fire feels nice. The time alone doing nothing gives me time to contemplate on my situation. I’m separated from my troop and probably assumed dead. My sword arm is all but useless and I have to rely on a mysterious person who can disappear into shadows. At least I’m not dead and only a week away from the castle where the Gala is being held.

     Z returns sometime later with a hare and begins roasting it over the fire. “We will rest her for the day then co to us traveling when nightfall hits. Rest up I will take first watch.”

     Dutifully I settle down on the forest floor with my sword and shield next to me for easy access. Eventually I manage to drift off into an uneasy sleep despite the bright light of the sun. Even so it feels to son when Z shakes me awake and I switch places with them. I munch on the hare and that’s left and wonder if Z excepts me to wake them up again or just keep watch for the rest of the day. I wish Z would communicate more.

     Travel continued like this for the next few days but on the fifth day when the sun set below the horizon and the moon rose, Z seemed even more paranoid than usual. They kept glancing this way and that searching for something. But what could they see? It was dark all around and no one else travelled at night.

     I realized why Z was acting so paranoid when I stumble forward due to the force of something hit the shield on my back I quickly swung it onto my arm and saw a crossbow bolt embedded in it. I spun quickly searching for the source of the bolt. I instinctively reached for my sword but couldn’t draw it out of its sheathes with my arm injured. I lost track of Z so I crouched hiding behind my shield spinning slowly. I heard another bolt flying through the air and turned to meet it. It slammed into my shield. I spotted the darting shadow in the woods and followed it as it joined a bigger group of shadows. Suddenly they were all running and screaming towards me, no away from something behind them. That something turned out to be who was shooting arrows with deadly precision towards the strangely clad figures. From each point where an arrow hit ice began to spread. Each stranger fell one by one until Z was standing alone in the edge of the woods.

     I straightened and began to start trying to yank the bolts out of my shield but failing because of my stupid arm. Z was methodically and calmly going from body to body collecting gold and arrows from the bodies. After giving up and just snapping off the shaft of the bolts and slinging the shield over my back and went to the nearest body flipping it over to look at the crest and it’s chest. It looks like a wooden stake over fangs. Vampire Hunters. Why were Vampire hunters after Z? Was Z a vampire? It would explain their freaky abilities. I nervously waited for Z to finish but tried to remain stoic. They hadn’t killed me yet. 

     Z finished looting all the bodies and came over to me. “Thanks for all the help.”

     I kick the dirt with my boot. “Sorry.”

     Z sighs. “Gee you don’t have to take everything so seriously. I was joking it is my job to protect you and that gimpy arm of yours.”

     I muttered a thanks. That’s the pot calling the kettle black Z. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Z take anything lightly. 

     Finally the castle is in sight. One more night of travel and we should be there. Unfortunately, my arm still hasn’t improved much so I’m not sure what I’ll do when I get there. The guard sure as hell won’t want me if I can’t use a sword. Z has opened up a little but these past few days joking around a little, but I’m still hesitant to open up to them.

     Z sits down on the ground next me and prods me gently in the shoulder. “What’s with the long face? We’re almost there. You’re almost back to your perfect little honorable life.”

     I look at them in disbelief. “What do you care I’m just another job for you?”

     Z shrugs. “I don’t really but Alex likes to lecture me about ‘being nice’ and don’t just be a ‘brooding shadow.’”

     “You and Alex seem close.”

     “We are. We’ve done a lot of jobs together.”

     I go back to sitting in silence prodding at the dirt and enjoying the warmth of the fire.

     Z interrupts the silence again. “Let me look at your arm. Hell beast bites can be tricky as they don’t want to heal like other bites.”

     I suppose that a welcome interruption. I set my sword and shield to the side then undo the straps on my armor before taking that off too. I remove my shirt so that the bandage is exposed and turn so my arm is towards Z. Z seems distracted though and isn’t looking at my arm. I swear to god if someone decides to attack right now while I’m shirtless with only a cloth binding around my chest preserving my humility then I’m going to kill someone. Then I follow Z’s gaze. They don’t seem distracted by any enemies but rather by me. Her eyes scan my shirtless torso as she unabashedly checks me out. Uncomfortable, a blush began to grow on my face. I cleared my throat. 

      Z seemed to snap back to attention and grabbed my arm carefully unwrapping the bandage. I avoided looking at first but curiosity took over and I immediately regretted it. The skin around the bite was a deep purple and it was oozing black puss. The actual bite wound was black. I had to bite back tears. My arm was never going to be the same. How was I supposed to be a knight of my sword arm was useless?

      Z cursed. “Shit. I’m not going to lie that’s bad. Maybe if I was Alex I would know how to fix it. She bothered to learn healing magic and alchemy while I focused on illusion magic and enchanting things to be more deadly.” I tore my gaze from my ruined arm which Z was cleaning. Z suggested weakly, “Maybe the doctors at the castle will be able to help.”

    Half heartedly, I muttered, “maybe.” No one I knew had ever survived a Hell Beast bite with all their limbs. I wondered why Alex had doomed me to this life, then chastised myself. It’s not her fault. After all I’m not her problem just a random stranger.

     Z finished re-bandaging my arm and I quickly put my shirt and armor back on. The sun had almost set. I grabbed my sword and shield and began putting out the fire. Z followed suite and soon we were back on the road. 

     The sun had just begun to rise over the horizon when we reached the gates to the village that surrounded the castle. The guards waved us past with the rest of travelers who had been waiting for the gates to open. Z travelled through the town with purpose navigating the maze of people with ease. Flirting through the masses like a shadow. In no time we had reached the gates to the castle. 

      Two knights of the day stood guard outside and stopped us. “What business do you have in the castle?”

      I stepped forward bowing. “Knight Allison of the Kingdom of Life. I was separated from my regiment when we were attacked by hellhounds. My friend has assisted me here as I was injured in the fight. My regiment was escorting Prince Leo here for the Gala.”

     The guards exchanged a look before the one on the right spoke. “I will stay here with you while my partner finds one of your regiment to verify your story.” As he spoke his partner left and went into the guardhouse and to the castle. 

      As we stood waiting, the throbbing that I had become accustomed to in my arm grew in pain and my head began to burn. I shifted my feet and stubbornly stood waiting. But my body refuses to wait longer the venom from the bite must have spread because my legs suddenly collapsed from under me as I clutched my arm. My vision began to swim and my breathing became shallow. This was it. I was going to die.

[thinkyoureholy]

The Game Played Right [1]

[Requested by anon]

.

.

.

Pairing : Kim Junmyeon / Reader

Genre : Angst, Fluff, Smut, CEO! AU

Words: 2.2k

Pt 1. Pt 2. Pt 3. Pt 4. Pt 5. Pt 6. Pt 7. Pt 8. Pt 9. Pt 10. Pt 11.

A/N: surprise surprise ya girl wasn't able to stay away for too long. Pls my brain couldn't have it I can't be without doing something I was losing my mind. So new series...yeee🙌🙌 new chapters will be uploaded every Tuesdays unless stated otherwise the week prior, hours may vary. I hope you all enjoy, especially the anon who sent in the request!😘

-Junmyeon's P.O.V-

I sat back as I watched him throw the papers to the floor angrily. I wore a bored expression as I watched him throw his little tantrum. I knew he was under a lot of pressure but seeing him act this way was both annoying and embarrassing. My father was always an ill tempered man, its the number one reason why I left the family home as early as I did. He wasn't very pleased with my decision but once he saw what I had to offer after I graduated college his attitude changed entirely. I worked my way up and became the CEO of the company he owned, a company that dealt with all sorts of technology. Though he didn't want to give his seat up he eventually allowed me to take the reigns, only just now showing his anger with me. You see I've been single since I came to the company, I had no time or desire to dive into a relationship. A relationship would take up too much of my time, it was too much of a distraction. But apparently that didn't look good at gatherings and so people began to talk.

“Do you have any idea what people are saying?” My father asked angrily.

“I could care less what they're saying.”

“Well you should care. Our stocks are decreasing little by little, it's not enough for it to be a problem but in a few years? This company will cease to exist.” He said in a low voice, “Our investors are pulling their money want to know why? It's all because of you.”

He paused as he stared me down before sighing heavily. He took a seat, pulling a cigarette out and lighting it before taking a drag. I narrowed my eyes at seeing him do so, hating the smell of it.

“They think your incompetent, and I'm not talking about your work ethic. They haven't seen you with a woman since you started working here and they-”

“Why the fuck is my private life any of their business?” I asked in frustration, cutting him off.

“Watch that fucking mouth with me, boy.” My father said, his voice dropping several octaves as there was an underlying threat in his words.

I scoffed, combing my fingers through my hair, “What is it you want me to do then?”

I knew he only came all the way here to give me an order. He's never shown up to my office, not once since I've been CEO has he set foot in here. I narrowed my eyes at the look on his face as he took a particularly long drag of his cigarette.

“Find somebody, anybody. I don't care who but do it quick...or else I'll do it for you.” He said before leaning forward and putting his cigarette out on my desk.

I set my jaw and clenched my hands into fists in irritation, watching as he got up from his seat. He didn't say another word as he walked out of my office, not even bothering to close my door. I cursed under my breath as I reached over for the phone on my desk, pressing the number that connected me with my assistant.

“Heejoon… get in here, now.” I said through gritted teeth, not even bothering to wait for his response as I hung up.

The old man was trying to control my life again but I'll be damned if I let him.

-

-Y/N's P.O.V-

I stirred in my sleep, feeling something fuzzy going across my face. I raised a hand sleepily, swatting whatever it was away. That did nothing as I felt it again. I groaned softly before opening my eyes, blinking a few times before seeing big greenish yellow eyes staring right back at me. He opened his little mouth and meowed softly, nuzzling his head against my cheek as he tried to get my attention. He had successfully had it the moment I felt his fur against my face in my sleep but I wanted to mess with him a little. Cats, him especially, are only cuddly with you when they want to be or they want something from you. And judging by how the sun was barely peeking through the horizon, my blinds barely hiding the ray of light he wanted me to feed him. I smiled softly, reaching up and petting the top of his head.

“I know I know, Angelo, I’m up.” I said, my voice still hoarse from just waking up.

I yawned before stretching my limbs, sitting up. I sat in bed for a few seconds, staring blankly at my bedroom door and sighed heavily before getting up. This was my daily routine. Get up at five a.m, feed Angelo, get ready for work, eat breakfast, go to work, work an eight hour shift and come back home and repeat the process all over again. It’s not that I hated how my life was at the moment but I couldn’t help but feel bored with it. Some would argue that I had what most people wanted; a nice home, a job that pays well, a loving pet at home, good friends, etc. But it was all getting old real fast. I was doing the same thing over and over again, never getting to do something I wanted to do because this set schedule was already ingrained into my brain.

I sighed heavily as I closed my front door, walking straight over to my car before getting in and driving off to work. I was about halfway there when I suddenly decided to go to a cafe about ten minutes from my job. I thought I could use a nice latte before I started my day. I walked into the cafe, stumbling upon a scene that made my jaw drop. A man in a suit was standing in front of the cashier, talking to the poor girl in a low but firm voice, as if he was reprimanding her. He pushed his coffee cup towards her, demanding for her to make him the coffee again. She apologized profusely, immediately taking the cup back but she was shaking so bad she spilt it behind the counter, the hot liquid covering her hand. I wanted to go over to help her out but her supervisor was quick to do so as he ushered her away, again apologizing to the man. The man said something I didn’t quite catch but he was quick to turn on his heel and start to exit the cafe. I caught a glimpse of his face on his way out, irritated with the fact that he was so handsome. I didn’t have time to say something about his behavior as he walked out, my attention being brought to a man rushing out of the restroom. My eyes shined with recognition as I watched him hurriedly run to the door, barely getting out a hello to me.

“Lee Heejoon!” I yelled after him, surprised to see him opening the car door to the rude man that just left the cafe.

I watched with my mouth agape as they drove off, dumbfounded by what I had just seen. Well...this was an eventful start to my day.

-

“He's gonna fire me if I don't find someone…” Heejoon sighed out, taking a sip from his drink.

I furrowed my eyebrows, still not being able to wrap my head around the whole purpose behind all this. His boss, rude cafe guy, wants him to find him someone to pretend to be his girlfriend to keep up appearances at gatherings. What I didn't get is why not just hire some escort or something. I mean from what he's told me his boss said anyone would do.

“Just hire some escort…” I said, having no interest in this topic whatsoever.

“No.” He said firmly, shooting me down immediately.

I shrugged as I took a sip from my own cup, choking on the liquid at his next sentence.

“Can't you do it?”

“W-What?!” I asked incredulously, my eyes wide, “No...Joon what the fuck?! I'm not doing it.”

“Please?” He practically begged, “He's paying twenty grand each day he calls you in.”

I choked on air this time, taken aback by the amount. Hearing how much he'd pay I was starting to rethink saying no. I made a decent amount of money from my job, it was enough to pay for my necessities and splurge on myself every once in awhile. I was smackdab in the middle of middle class, maybe even slightly higher. It's not like I really needed the money but...it'd be nice to have it, y'know, in case of an emergency.

I shook my head at those thoughts, “No.”

“Y/N please.” He pleaded with me, “I don't want to lose my job.”

I frowned at how desperate he sounded. It seems like a serious issue but was I really willing to get paid to pretend to be someone's girlfriend?

……

I straightened out my pencil skirt as I stood up, fidgeting with a button on my blouse. I can't believe I'm actually doing this. I sighed out heavily, glaring at Heejoon as he opened the door to his office. He didn’t even bother to look up from his computer, signalling for me to take a seat in front of his desk. I looked to Heejoon but he just shrugged his shoulders before leaving the two of us alone. I took hesitant steps towards him, awkwardly sitting across from him as I waited for him to finish whatever he was doing on his computer. While he was busy in his work I took the time to get a better look at him. Yeah I saw how handsome he was at the cafe but seeing him now was a whole different story.

His hair was perfectly combed up and out of his face, all but one strand of hair that had seemed to go out of place during the work day but even that hair laid perfectly against his forehead. The top button of his shirt was undone as his tie hung loosely further down, lowered past his collar bones. He had the sleeves of his shirt rolled up to his elbows, exposing his forearms as he worked. The longer he typed  the more prominent the vein on his forearm got. I could feel myself staring for too long as I swallowed harshly, distracting myself as I looked around the room.

“What do you do?”

The sound of his voice startled me, my mouth running dry as I didn’t quite catch what he said. He noticed this immediately, a heavy sigh leaving his lips as he reached up to pinch the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger. He stayed silent for a few seconds before asking the same question.

“I’m an architect.” I answered, watching as his eyes widened at my answer.

“Why do you want this job if you're an architect?” He asked, sounding sincere with his curiosity.

“I-” I cut myself off from continuing, remembering that Heejoon said not to mention anything about knowing him so instead I made up a lie, “I...I have a lot of debt and I don't make enough to pay it all off as quickly as I'd like…”

He narrowed his eyes before sitting back in his chair, seeming to believe my lie, “Are your hours at work flexible?”

“They could be.”

“Your name?”

“Y/N.”

“Your social status?”

“My what?”

He frowned at my answer, the gears in his head turning as he examined me with his eyes. I said and did nothing as he scanned me from head to toe, only starting to fidget when he stared for longer than I thought he would.

“Well, it's not like it matters really at least not with a face like yours...” He said under his breath before standing up, “You've got the job then. You can address me as either Mr. Kim or Junmyeon, though you should call me Junmyeon in front of others to make it seem like we're close but when it's just the two of us I don't really care what you call me. Now, we have a meeting to attend, let's go.”

“N-Now?” I stuttered out, rising from my seat as he was already starting to fix his shirt.

He said nothing as slipped on his suit jacket, giving me another once over, “Your clothes will have to do. I'll have Heejoon get your measurements and everything before you leave, send you some new stuff to wear for different occasions.”

And with that he left, leaving me in the office standing like an idiot. I stared after him, seeing Heejoon pop his head into the office and gesturing for me to follow. I narrowed my eyes, glaring at the man I didn't know if I wanted to call my friend anymore.

“What the hell did you get me into?” I whispered to him roughly as I passed by, watching him shrink back at the anger in my voice.

My gaze turned to Junmyeon as I felt his eyes on me. He raised his brows before gesturing to the open elevator. I gave Heejoon one last glare and went to join him in the elevator.

What the hell did I get myself into?

[thehermitsaltar]

Talking

Requested by @codydato: “Could you do a Sebastian x Chris x Male reader, where the reader chris and Seb are in a three way relationship and are on set for a marvel movie”

Seb x Chris x Male!Reader

Word Count: 1000

A/N: I hate myself

It was always good to be back on set; seeing your friends, acting, stretching your legs, the works. But it was even better when you worked with your hot boyfriends who were the stars of the movie you were acting in.

You and Chris had met first while filming a terrible movie around 2009. The movie was awful, bad script, mean director, and even worse everyone was fawning over the new up and coming star, Chris. I mean yeah, he was hot but that didn’t get in the way of your acting- it didn’t until the sex scene you guys had to shoot. It was bad and fake but it got you and chris closer to where you would talk and laugh about your careers. Then it turned from talking about past movies too talking about family, relationships, where each other was from. Then friendly coffee turned into dinners at fancy restaurants. Until Chris finally asked you on a proper date and things went from there, everything was amazing. You guys had moved in, got a dog, even starred in some more movies together. It was all going great until Chris got a job as Captain America in the first cap movie. You were happy for him of course, I mean it was a marvelous role.

But there he met Sebastian. The six foot tall, dark haired, fit Romanian with a smile that could make anyone swoon. This man was gorgeous inside and out to say the least. How do you know this? From Chris’ nonstop blabbering about how amazing he was, it was obvious Chris had feelings toward him, not that he’d ever say or act upon them.

It had been 3 months of Chris talking about Sebastian, or as he called him “Seb”, until finally you snapped. Chris was currently talking about a scene they had done and it was driving you crazy.

“I mean Seb did amazing, he delivered the line perfectly and his eyes-”

“If ya love the bastard so much then live with him!” You shouted and got up from the couch and stormed off to the kitchen to get a drink and cool down from your sudden outburst, Chris of course followed.

“Whoa, whats ya problem?” Chris asked with that thick boston accent of his as he crossed his arms and leaned on the door frame.

You slammed a cup on the counter and turned to look at him, that was the wrong thing to say. “My problem? My problem?! My problem is the man I love is gushing with love for another man that I don’t even know! All you talk about is Sebastian! How good an actor he is, how smart he is, how freaking attractive he is-” you stopped to take a breath and looked down sadly.

Chris spoke up “Meet him”. Your eyes shot up to his, meet him? How will that help anything.

2 Weeks later

The past two weeks had been filled with talking. Chris talking to you, Chris talking to Sebastian, Chris talking to Dodger. Just a lot of talking. Ya’ see Chris was insanely in love with his boyfriend, he loved everything about him, from his weird quirks to his good days to his bad days to even his clothes. But as they grew closer it always felt like something was missing, not a child. Definitely not a child. But he thought they just had to spend more time with friends and such so they did but still Chris felt an empty space in their bed. That was until he met Sebby and the pieces just started to fit. Now don’t get him wrong, he would never cheat or even think of cheating on Y/N but maybe, just maybe he could have them both. He fell in love with the twinky boy fast and the more he worked with Seb the stronger it got. So he understood why Y/N had flipped out but he was just talking Seb up so Y/N might want meet him and possibly fall in love with him too.

So here they were after a lot of talking and a lot of convincing, having dinner. Y/N, Chris and Sebastian. It was fairly awkward, not that it was anyone's fault, I mean everyone was pleasant and civil, it was just uncomfortable. There was small talk, light tension and spaghetti. It was all very calm, some might even say boring until right in the middle of eating Dodger hopped right up on the dinner table and ate everything, literally all the food. Chris was frantic to tame the dog but when he found his two loves in a fit of laughter he smiled softly to himself. The laughter was followed by a joke here and one there then eventually Seb and Y/N were asking about books, birth places, family and favorite whiskeys. Chris couldn’t have been happier to see the two getting along. He knew if they met and talked they would get along and their jealousy would disappear.

From that night on Seb came around more. It had even gotten to the point where even if Chris wasn’t home Sebby would come over. Then he started to stay the night, then after more talking Chris and Sebastian went out on their first date. It was just them that night then next weekend it was Y/N and Sebs date night. They had decided that the first dates should be special and romantic, like Y/N and Chris’ first date had been.

After a few months Seb moved into their apartment. From there on the trio just went up, they loved each other, they shared, they never got jealous and Chris had found the missing piece to their little family.

Now it was 2018 and you guys were on the set of Infinity War. It was nice to see people, not everyone was there but still. It was a little scary being on set considering you guys had just come out with your relationship only this year. But if anyone said anything Seb would go crazy on them, he was very protective of you two. But no one really said anything, I mean close friends had known for ages and anyone else didn’t dare mess with three fairly big dudes.

(Tags: @mrgrant9559-blog)

[kelsmister]

Phoenix Fan Fusion 2019 -- Artist Alley Review May 23-26 2019 *Thursday - Sunday* ==Opinions expressed are completely my own, and from my own record. If your experience differed, then good for you. This is how the event unfolded for me. You are more than welcome to write your own review, and even allowed to vend at this event. Keep in mind my opinions are again, of my own accord.== Once again I decided to brave the desert sun and venture out of my comfortable air conditioned room to sell my various wares in the hopes of making a decent buck. After my hard drive crashed two weeks ago I had high hopes this event could at least cover part of those expenses. Oh boy, did this show do a 180 and nose dive into the deep end of the pool without bracing for impact. Where to start? I’ve been doing PCC (as it was formerly known as before the lawsuit involving San Diego vs some weird event in Colorado), for about 6 ish years now. Maybe closer to 10 by now. Point is, I’ve seen this show go from great things to downright lousy. This year was one of the lousier ones. For those who don’t know, or plum forgot, around 2 years back a man brought in real weapons, real bullet proof armor, and had threatened the life of one of the guests at the con. Idiot posted said exploits online where his one and only online chum alerted authorities and he was swiftly apprehended before he could do such vile acts. The next day the con had to crack down hard on security, as the city pressured them to not have one of those ‘mass shootings’ happen in THEIR city. (Hey I don’t want to be shot at either!) The whole scramble to get metal detectors and REAL security personnel (not just teen volunteers) took it’s toll as lines stretched for hours around the buildings in 110+ sweltering heat. Some passed out, others drenched in sweat, it was bad. Many vowed never to return, as last year did show a slight decrease in attendance. However the damage was already done. Last year the increased costs for security left the con with empty wallets and almost zero budget, they fell seriously into the red nearly going bankrupt because of it. So this year they revamped everything by cutting corners wherever they could. First thing- entry points restricted to just 3. I believe the prior year it was 5, so right there it’s not as many personnel you need to hire, or rather pay the company to hire. Secondly, they moved registration back inside the building, so saving on rental tents and such. Third, they really cut corners with the artist alley. They added more artists. Pipe and drape were scraped. Tables were now side by side, no gaps no 2 feet of spacing between you and your neighbors. Now everyone resided in 8 table deep rectangles with taped down walkways behind everyone to ‘allow entry/exit’ for the middle tables with mini pipe and drape at the ends to block out the attendees. Did I mention more artists? Seriously, they squeezed in so many that the aisles did not match up with the vendor aisles. Row 900 was actually row 1000 in artist alley. This confused several attendees walking by who would look up to see a huge banner saying one thing but the ground saying another. Our once nicely printed up table signs, which use to hang off of the pipe and drape backings were now lazily stapled to the front of tables, which fell off rather easily fyi. The rectangle of selling for each cluster of artists left many to just push their now brought from home photo backdrops to the very edge of their space, some not caring at all and just going over these 1.5 feet of ‘walkway’. Many tri-pod legs stuck out, I myself kicked a few out of frustration and even had to yell at a neighbor behind me who somehow thought the double lines were ‘his’ space. Again, no one ever came by and demanded the space be free. If pipe and drape were used instead it wouldn’t have been an issue. But being right up against each neighbor was infuriating to say the least. You couldn’t hang anything on the sides of your display for fear people would think it was your neighbor’s work. Without the pipe and drape the sea of artists looked horrid. Random photo backdrops as far as the eye could see. Some looked good, but others yuck. For those who don’t have backdrops it looked just like a big yard sale. And a lot, and I mean A LOT of tables were left empty. At cons it’s common for a few people not to show up, emergencies happen, but heck even my neighbor didn’t show allowing me to stretch out onto his space (free of charge kind of nice). Besides this they never did closing announcements. You got one at 5 minutes till but nothing else. Not saying every con does this, but at a show this big, and a hall this grand, you have to warn the public. “Hey guys 1 hour until the vendor hall closes!” “Not to alarm you all but the hall closes in 30 minutes!” “Better make those last minute purchases, hall is closing in 10 minutes. Please start making your way to the exit!” Nope, none of this. Also, randomly, on Saturday around noon someone got a hold of the overhead PA system and started blaring music. It was so loud we all were covering our ears. After song number two started to play I rushed over to the exhibit hall manager booth where I kid you not an ARMY of angry vendors were ready to lynch someone. Eventually the music cut off and we all cheered, but never heard how that happened. Maybe a blu-tooth thing?

Security. Oh boy. They had MAJOR problems. This was supposedly the same company hired the prior year, but man they didn’t act like it. Prior year everything ran smoothly, never a problem, but this year it felt like rookies-r-us training camp or something. Day 0 I overheard one of them, as they searched me ask another “Uh.. what do I do again?” Not exactly encouraging to hear. I get not all of them can be trained veterans of this, but most acted like day 1 newbies. Each day their ‘allowed/not allowed’ list changed. Sometimes they allowed bottled water, other days nope toss it. Luckily being a vendor they allowed me all the bottles of soda and water and snacks, but I heard the rumors. Some said they had to toss their sealed Gatorade or sandwiches in bags. And sometimes I was allowed in any entry point, the last two days they forced me to the one furthest away. Again, you guys can’t change the rules EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Pick something stick with it. Heck on one day, I think Friday, I got in the specialty line but the staff pointed me to general and said it “would be quicker”. Ok whatever. So I hoped over, nope. It wasn’t. Guys in front of me reeked of BO, and this was at 9am, and of course had bags in a bag in a bag. So searching took FOREVER. As I’m waiting for my turn a supervisor approaches me and points to the other line saying “Madam vendors are supposed to go through the specialty line-” I cut her off “YES I know, YOUR employee sent me HERE. I’m not hopping lines, I’m staying here. Go yell at her.” She tried to make me go but gave up after a bit.  Never had this problem before. Makes me wonder what this company did to suddenly get a bunch of rookies working for them who haven’t got a clue. OH. With the weird ness too, some days they made me open the money box and shuffle through it, other days nope didn’t care! AGAIN IT WASN’T CONSISTENT. NOT ONE BIT. Bathrooms. Another disgusting beast. This convention center has multiple bathrooms, I’m thankful for that, but the one closest to me oh boy, it was busy almost every hour. It reeked by the end of day one and never lost that lovely wretched odor of feces, urine, and chlorine. Did I forget to mention that cleaning staff, fed up with doing their one job of cleaning, almost went on strike during this? They complained to the con saying the bathrooms were too hard to maintain during this crazy event, and had threatened to just up and close the downstairs restrooms as a consequence. Con luckily put their foot down, but it did explain why at one point I saw the barrier up around the bathroom while the cleaning crew gave me the stank eye as I had to walk further down to whiz. So, the take away, if you didn’t bother to read my lovely little rant. PROS: - 8 foot table - 3 badges per table - Largest show in AZ - Easy to get into (application wise) - Big attendance numbers - Several hotels near by - Easy walk from light-rail (public transit)

CONS: - Table cost over $300 (for inline) - Table cost varying $300-500+ (endcaps higher) - Security and flip flop rules - No ‘cheap’ food alternatives - No food trucks, only con center food court - Strict food ban (cannot bring in whole pizzas) - No free parking - Booth space reduced - Pipe and drape gone (possible cost in future) - TONS more artists now - Guests not best draws - Crowded but not a lot of buyers - Huge homeless problem (it is downtown) - Ticket scalpers, you have been warned - Aisles narrowed - Tables side by side (no exits for some)

[kur0kvmi]

The Menacing Mind of Felix Lombardi-Act 2

I peek through the door glass one more time, to make sure I’m not hallucinating. Yep. Ami Fujinami in the mother, fucking flesh. 

“Felix? I know you’re in there, open up” Ami said, in between repeatedly knocking

“Yea I’ll open it up in a minute” I said as I frantically searched for a clean pair of sweatpants to wear.

Ami and I have known each other for the entirety of the 2 years I’ve been living at this apartment. She and her Grandma have taken pretty good care of me seeing as I’m not exactly the best at it. 

“Hi Ami, what brings you here?” I asked, trying to push out the conversation with my brother from my mind

“Well, a strange man in a dark blue suit was here yesterday and he gave me 2 tickets to Mysticon” 

And then it call comes rushing back

“Wow that’s weird, well have fun” I said as I tried to close the door on her, only for her to stop the door from shutting.

“He said he was your brother, and that I should ask you to go with me” Ami said, slowly edging towards me like she was trying to get a good look at the reflection in my eyeballs.

“Well, I have no idea who you’re talking about. I don’t have a brothe-”

“Hello? Mr. Lombardi? He said exactly what you said he’d say. Mhmm That he doesn't have a brother. Should I hand him the phone? Ok. Ok. I’ll tell him.” 

Oh fuck.

“He says if you don’t go to Mysticon with me, I should tell Obaa-san to lock you out of the wifi for a month” Ami said, in the most perfunctory tone imaginable.

“First of all, you can’t do tha-”

“Yes. Yes I can. And to be honest, I don’t care if Mr. Lombardi is your real brother or not, I want to go to Mysticon, and I don’t care who with. So you’re going with me Felix.” Despite the fact that Ami was more or less extorting a date out of me, she did so with the gusto and demeanor of a middle schooler who just won a spelling bee. 

“Why couldn’t you just go by yourself?”

“The deal is, I take you, and I get a free ticket. Mr. Lombardi was very clear about this” 

“So I have no choice”

“None at all”

“Alright. Come knock on my door on saturday”

“It is Saturday, you bum”

“Why aren’t we using your car?” Ami moaned as we exited the building. 

“The train is faster” I said, pulling a pack of cigarettes out of my jacket.

“Mysticon is in Hells Kitchen right?” Ami asked, whilst reaching into her backpack

“Yup, and it’s...3pm, traffic will be annoying, and I don’t wanna worry about driving back if I buy weed.” I said, pulling out my lighter

“What have I told you about smoking when you’re next to me.” Ami said, pulling out a batton, then flicking it to extend it’s length. 

I put the cig back in the pack, whilst prompting her to sheathe her weapon. Throughout the journey my mind is racing. Ami and I hanging out again? It’s not that I like her or anything, it’s just that I kind of missed her. Hey I’m allowed to have feelings aren’t I? I’m sure you’re wondering “but Felix, if you missed hanging out with her, why did you stop talking to her?” Why yes fair reader, that’s a very adequate question, however the nature of our relationship isn’t that simple. Ami is kind of an all around nerd aficionado, she cosplays, she writes fanfics, she draws, she sings anime openings on youtube, it’s kind of scary how much she does all over the place. Recently she’s started to get really famous online, she’s started to devote a lot more time to it, and She started ghosting. Being distant... And you know me, I ain’t exactly a butterfly myself, so we just drifted apart. She should be making money on youtube, couldn’t she just get her own tickets?

“Obaa San wouldn’t let me” Ami said as we reached the station. “She’s against anime conventions on principle”. 

“Is this about a ‘Japan is more than anime’ thing?” I asked, shifting over to the right as I stepped on the escalator so I could walk down past the standers.

��No that’s more my parents. Baa san is a reeeeaaally old school Otaku.”

“Then what’s her beef with anime conventions?”

“She thinks they’re ‘commodified caricatures of otaku culture’ or something along those lines” Ami said as we hopped on the train.

Granny Fujinami isn’t wrong in the slightest.

“So she won’t be mad at you for going?” 

“She’s only letting me go because I’m going with you. It’s aaalways about you with her.”

“Not my fault i’m the grandson she never had” I said while making a mocking face at Ami.

“She only loves you cuz you’re a broken mess she can nurture. You’re like my dad. Ugh, you’re like all men really.”

Ouch.

“Ouch.” 

“Suck it up loser.” Ami said, shifting her direction away from me. 

“You’re so cute when you go all Tsun” I said, pulling out my phone.

“That would imply me having any ‘dere’ for you.” Ami snapped back.

So hot.

[At the Convention]

What’s going on what’s going on going on. Everyone’s looking at us. Well I guess I am walking next to Amura. Yes that’s Ami’s social media name, you try coming up with something better at 12. Mine’s [REDACTED]. This is not what I signed up for. Louis Othello Lombardi you fucking bastard. You knew this would happen. You did your homework on Ami and figured out she’d be a lightning rod for attention. Keep me around her, and I’m bound to be assaulted by nothing. But. Fucking. People.

“OH MY GOD IT’S AMURA!” Two young girls screamed. “But I heard you weren't coming? You said so on twitter :(.“ I swear to almighty Haruhi Suzumiya, if there was such a thing as a frowny face emoji in real life, whatever that girl did was damn close. 

“Well change of plans ^_^” Oh my god, Ami can speak emoji too!

“So what panels are you going to? I heard Gail has a panel about anime piracy” Said one of the fangirls, angling towards it on the con directory. 

“Gail from Crunchyroll?” 

“Sounds fun! Felix, ikimasu!” Whoever this version of Ami was, I wanted NO PARTS. 

“Sounds lame. I’m going to the arcade.” I was putting my foot down

“Ok cool. Hand me your pass then. You can pay on your own.” 

“You can’t do tha-”

“Yes. Yes I can. You want this pass?.” Ami pulled out the 3 day convention pass out of her purse and dangled it in front of me. Obviously I tried snatching at it, only for Ami to move it out of the way. Damn japanese reflexes.

“Gotta be quicker than that. We’re going to the panel. Follow me.” Ami said, tossing me the pass.

“If you sneak off, I’m calling Obaa chan.” she said, in that her perfunctory yet declaratory way.  

“...So what you end up having is an environment where it’s harder and harder for us to justify hosting servers for anime distribution, because they don’t wanna pa- *ahem* because piracy.” Or something to that effect I’m not really listening to this Gail lady.

Anime piracy is a dumb thing to have a panel about anyway, it’s not like anybody in this room even knows how to torrent off wonwons, let alone\ how find the right codec for shows with bad compression. These are a bunch of crunchycores. The kinds of anime fans so hopped up on seasonal hype that the mere thought of an anime older than 12 months makes their tongues run dry, and their eyes wire shut.

“Are there any questions?”

“You got anything to ask?” chuckled Ami. 

“Why are we here. We both know Kissanime is in your bookmarks” I jeered.

“Networking dummy. I talk to Gail after the panel, and smooth out something over at Crunchyroll” For some reason Ami’s eyes did the dollars signs when she said “crunchyroll”

“In San Francisco? You’d hate it there.”

“I’d make it there. That’s the important part. I’d really make it. I’d be in.” 

“In what?” I said with a look of befuddlement. 

“You wouldn’t understand. You’re basically guaranteed a job after graduation” 

“Hey, don’t make it like tha-”

“Don’t make it like what Felix?” Ami snapped, but less with anger, and more a tired expression.

The Panel was beginning to wind down, and folks were getting up to leave. Ami bounced out of her seat and darted towards the stage. 

“Gaaaaaiiiil! Hiii, I follow you on twitter!” Ami screamed, like a schoolgirl seeing a classmate

“Amura! I follow you too! I love your singing” Gail responded in a surprisingly similar manner.

“Thanks so much, ugh. That means alot l love you and Sailor Bee’s podcast ^_^” This whole display was just. The worst. 

I backed off from the discussion, but I knew I wasn’t gonna be able to make it far without incurring that good old Fujinami wrath. Jeez they’re taking forever. Is this a meet and greet? Or a job interview. 

“Felix? Oh shit, how you been bruh?” This voice, I recognized it. 

I turned around, and yup, it was Tyler. 

“Who let riff raff like  you in here?” I said as we shook hands

“Is that any way to treat your one black friend:” He responded dryly. 

“I have plenty of black friends. Unlike you, most of my friends are girls.” I shot back. 

“Yea right, if you ever left your yuppie ass play pad I’d believe you.”

“You’d be surprised how many of em recognize me from Ami’s streams.”

“The streams she stopped inviting you to?” 

“Low blow T.” 

Tyler is a friend from Highschool who runs in the same online circles that I do. We keep in touch through discord and trade merchandise on message boards. He’s been trying to break into the FGC since middle school and recently struck a deal with a team based out of Brooklyn, The Mash Masters. He’s pretty good, quick reflexes, consistent muscle memory, but he lacks patience, and his neutral game needs work. 

“Where you headed to after this? Tryna hit up the arcade?” Asked Tyler as he picked up his backpack getting ready to leave. 

“I’m here with Ami, I gotta check and see where she’s headed to” 

“Whooptish” Tyler said, while making a whipping motion. 

“You know it’s not like that bro.” I shot back

“For her it isn’t, for you it is.” he retorted. 

I told him to wait up for a sec as I went over to Ami & Gail. They were still chopping it up like they’d known each other since band camp. 

“Shoot me a DM on twitter whenever you get the chance, I’d love to get you acquainted with the rest of my team. Maybe even talk bringing you to some other cons around the east coast ;)” Naruhodo, it seems this Gail is also of the emoji Clan. 

“Sure thing! Don’t forget to tweet out the channel link with the picture, and tell Vicky I said hi!” Ami said gleefully. 

“I definitely will, but uhh, she hates being called Vicky. Victoria or Sailorbee are just fine.” Gail responded, with a tinge of trepidation.

“Yea, I made that mistake on twitter once, it wasn’t pretty” I said with a chuckle.

“Oh hello, and who might you be?” Asked Gail.

“This is my friend Felix I was telling you about.” Ami said. Wait, telling her about what?

“Ah yes, the animator. Ami showed me your fan animation of Diebuster. Very interesting to see a Gainax show done with heavy Yutapon vibes” This lady knows her stuff.

“This lady knows her stuff” I said to Ami. 

“Of course I do silly, I work in the anime industry” The smile Gail shot me as she said this wouldn’t be out of place in a Shaft anime.  

“You definitely have some real skills. We’re looking for someone to do a sakuga heavy promo for our new youtube ad. If you’re interested, Ami has my contact info. It was so very nice meeting the both of you, don’t forget to keep in touch.” Gail said in a warm, professional tone as she got up to leave. 

“Well she seems nice” I said to Ami. 

“You’re welcome Felix.” Said Ami, in her usual biting tone. 

“I didn’t ask you for that. If I wanted a job at Crunchyroll I’d have one already.”

“‘Thanks Ami, I really appreciate you showing my work to someone really influential who can open doors in my chosen profession, would you like headpats?’” Ami said, in a mocking imitation of my sultry ciciillian speech pattern. 

“First of all, fine, thank you, that was a very nice thing to do, and I was pleasantly surprised. Secondly, do you seriously want headpats?”

“Don’t flatter yourself, you weirdo” And there’s the Tsun again. 

“I ran into Tyler, he says he’s going to the Arcade, and I was looking to go with. You in?”

“Tyler’s here? Yea sure, let’s go” 

Ami & I leave the stage and head over to where Tyler is sitting when I get a text on my phone. 

[11:58. Text from Lou]: Having fun?

[11:58. You]: Yea

He’s just like mom. 

“Oh my god it’s Amura! Could you sign my Fightstick?” Tyler sniggered, his fightstick outstretched. He’s such an asshole I love it. 

“Knock it off, I’d actually sign it if I didn’t know you’d just flip it on Ebay” Ami sneered, arms folded and head angrily tossed to the side. 

“Aww don’t be like that, I really did want your autograph. You’d be surprised how many Blazblue players would pay good cash for one” Tyler said, packing his fightstick back in his backpack. 

“If anyone’s gonna make money off the Amura brand it’s gonna be ME!” Ami retorted viciously.

“Now that’s just anti-black business” I said, chuckling as Tyler dapped me up. 

Ami rolled her eyes as heavy as she could roll them and stomped out of the conference room, and we sheepishly trailed after her.

By this point in the day I’d grown used to Ami being a lightning rod for attention. My camera skills must have leveled up big time from all those pics I had to take, of her with fans. Just getting to the Arcade area of the convention was a whole 20 minutes of photo after photo with weeb after arrested developed weeb, and to be honest I was practicing some big time restraint to not just walk out of the center and catch an Uber home. But surely enough, through fire by force, we found ourselves at the-

Boy was this the kind of place I wanted to be. The whole area was what you’d expect from a high profile convention in a big city. What seemed to be at least 30 TVs all hooked up with consoles spanning an entire auditorium. This wasn’t an arcade, it felt more like a Bazaar crossed with a colosseum. You have your old reliables for the boomers like Street Fighter, MK, ok that’s neat, there’s Melee, 64, Ultimate, Smash 4, oh even Brawl, full house, that’s impressive. As we moved through, you could imagine that there were furrowed brows due to the smell, but in all honesty it wasn’t as bad as most invitationals I’ve been to. We couldn’t find the game we were here for though; Blazblue. Tyler directed us to the kiosk so we could get directions. 

“Nigga where the Blazblue at?” Tyler said to one of the convention attendees, 

All the way at the back, by the Under Night” The Attendee responded.

I was just about ready to dart over there when Tyler said: 

“Nah hol’ up real quick bro, I got a question I gotta ask you” uh oh, I hear the Brooklyn leaking out. 

“Yea? Is there something wrong?” the attendee said, with a befuddled expression.

“Y’all always hide the anime fighters, what's up with that?” Tyler said blankly, almost with no life at all. 

“It’s not my decision where the games are set up-”

“That’s not what I asked bro. I’ve done conventions fam, I sat where you sat. NYCC 2017, bigger con than this, and from what I know about my time there, y’all have a meeting to coordinate where the games are set up. Correct?” Oh my god, Tyler what are you doing. 

“Yes correct” The attendee responded. 

“So you were in the room when the decision was made, correct?” This is so wacky

“Yea, but like, I didn’t have a choi-”

“Nobody’s asking about a choice, I’m asking you, what was the reasoning behind the decision?” Should I stop this? Or?...

“They didn’t want the anime stuff turning folks away” Oh no, here we go

“There it is” Tyler said triumphantly as he began to walk off. 

“Hey, I think it’s bullshit too ma-” t

“Yet you said nothing. You and all your boys said nothing. Aight, I see you fam. Haruhi’s watching you” Tyler said, his back already turned and walking away.  “Let’s go guys”

“Did you have to make such a big hoopla you maniac?” Ami said laughing her ass off. 

“Because I have Principles Fujinami, you should try em some time” Tyler snapped back. 

“That was the FUNNIEST shit I’ve seen all day, I’m so happy I knew to record that” Ami said, still cackling. 

“Wait you recorded that?” Tyler said, shocked

“I uploaded it. Enjoy being a meme” Ami said blankly.

“Not again…” Tyler sighed.

We finally make it to the Blazblue section, and it’s about as serviceable as you’d expect. Two TVs both hooked up to PS4s playing Central Fiction. There wasn’t much of a crowd, about 5 or 6 people, all looked to be around college age, couple on the boomer side though. All guys. 

“This game is so hyperactive…” Ami said, in a tone betwixt judgement and bewilderment. 

“Not every game gotta be Street Fighter” Said Tyler. “Ey yo, who got next?” Tyler asked a portly asian fellow playing Taokaka. 

“Uhh, I dunno, anybody got next?” the Taokaka player asked. The crowd shook their heads. “I guess it’s on you bro after this.” 

Nobody else noticed, But Tyler’s killing intent began to spike. I get you’re excited kiddo, but you haven’t even chewed the scenery yet. 

The game was pretty hype. There it was Taokaka vs Valkenhayn. Both characters with adequate rushdown capabilities and heavy damage. The Valkenhayn was an even match, but the Tao was just catching clutch reversals at every corner. It felt like seeing a tiger beat a lion by leaving a bigger gash every time they left the scuffle. Tyler, ever the professional, was quiet as a mouse. A mouthy prick like him? Quiet? I know right? But he gets like this when it’s Blazblue. The data collection phase. See if Street Fighter is Chess, then Blazblue is Mahjong. The same level of depth, but a wider variety of dealing with situational disadvantages and advantages. Tyler sees what I’m seeing and he’s analyzing, putting his pieces together, he’s not here for fun. This is off the job training. 

“FINISH” 6 red letters on the television screen. Read em & Weep. 

“My turn now right?” Tyler asked the Taokaka player. 

“Yup. What’s your name?” said the Tao player

“Tyro, and you?” oh yea I forgot that was his FGC name, everywhere else he’s Tyrilla. He sucks at names yes I know.

“I’m Yiao, nice to meet you.” Yiao said, pushing his glasses up.

The character selection screen pops up and… Wait don’t tell me he…Oh boy, Tyler’s picking his middle school main. Hazama. Yiao on the other hand started mousing over Tao then over to Litchi. Come on pick a character already. After more mousing, his cursor finally landed on Mai... From rushdown to range spam. Just all around bloodthirst.

Both of them sat in silence as the loading screen started up, until Yiao broke that silence.

“I’ve heard of you, Mash Master Tyro. To be honest I was hoping we’d meet. I have this Mai prepared just for you.” said Yiao. Yawn. This happens all the time. Tyler’s probably got him scoped already too.

“Yiao, third runner up at Anifight Staten Island. Three. Years. Running.” Yup, knew it. Tyler lives for this shit.

“You wanna know why HowRite was able to beat you 3 to nothing last year?” Tyler said, deadpan staring at the screen.

“THE WHEEL OF FATE IS TURNING” oh shit the round is starting.

“Cuz he knew if he lost, he’d never get to face my mentor in the finals”

“But wait. Ulysses isn’t on your team?” Yiao said confused, the backstory here is really weird, I’d be confused as well to be honest. 

“REBEL 1” 

“Ulysses is my stepdad.” 

“ACTION”

Told you. 

End of Act 2. 

[kmelanin]

King of All-3

a/n: Hi hi! Feed back is much appreciated! I love you.

ONE  TWO  THREE

Summary: He is evil, you are good. word count: 3.3k

________________________________

Jimin sits cross legged next to you laying soundly asleep. He couldn't help but to sit here close to you looking up and down your body. You were his, he was so happy he had such a beautiful women in his bed. The sun is peeking through the dark maroon curtains. The light is right on your back bandages. It still angers him of how careless he was. This is what he wanted from the very beginning. He has been practicing his self control on whores from the streets, but clearly they could not be compared to you.

If the hounds knew about your healing, then everyone knows. Jimin shakes his head in anger, he runs his hands through her hair and he squeezes his eyes shut wanting to go back in time and make you stay with him and say that he didn't care if you were on the other side of his home.

What he didn't know, was that you woke up almost a second before he closed his eyes and ran his fingers through his hair.

He turns his head and looks at himself in closet doors, which were mirrored. His eyes were glowing white. He remembers what Namjoon told him not to long ago.  

“Jimin…” You whispers turning over a little bit, but he quickly puts his hands on your shoulder and holds you still. He holds his head down and eyes shut.

“You should stay still. They knew about your healing, so they got some type of poison that prevents your wounds from healing. So they cut the infected skin off.” He says looking up at you, and a shiver goes through your spine when you see the glowing eyes. “So your body is creating new skin and healing at the same time.”

He leans his hands up and peels back the bandages. You breath in when the cooler air touches your wound.

“It looks like it's healed over,” He grazes his finger tips onto and it's felt almost as if he shot you with electricity. You jump a little at the cold finger. “It's still tender, be careful. Ill put new bandages on you and get you a shirt.” He says turning away and getting up to the dresser. You didn't even notice that you were shirtless until he mentioned a shirt.

“Also, Namjoon found out why my eyes are going white. He said that my body isnt used to being so close to a food source. You give off such powerful waves of this feeling and power. It's different for every emotion. Back then, my family had some sources living in the home, so they were used to them. But me…” He chuckles when he makes his way back over. “I was stuck sucking blood out of plastic pouches.” He puts a thick paste right on the cuts, and surprisingly it felt wonderful, so cool against your hot skin. He then gets the skin secure tape and padding and covers it up. He then hands you the shirt and turns away.

You noticed that it didn't hurt as bad moving around. You finally put the shirt on and sit up down on the bed. You look at the back of Jimin's body.

“He said the only way to calm whatever this is down, I have to drink straight from you periodically until it doesn't happen, unless i want it to of course.” he says and turns back around to you when he notices that you aren't making anymore noise. He is about five steps away from you, and he slowly comes forward.

“Then drink from me Jimin. This is the reason why i'm here, is it not?” You say looking into his eyes, watching his face. Seeing how his eyes turn black then slowly turn white as he gets closer and closer. His face churns as if he was in pain.

“Over all yes. But I can't.” he says just above a whisper.

“And why not?” You ask standing up. He is now a foot away. You didn't understand why you were acting like this, wanting him to drink from you. Even though you hate him.

“I won't be able to control myself.” He looks away to the floor and that makes you mad.

“Jimin! Stop acting like you care. You can recreate my blood for crying out loud! Who cares if you can't control yourself, i'd rather be dead than be near y-”

A hand grabs your throat  but yet to squeeze. Your vision was blurred, but when it clears you see Jimin on the end of the arm, and your back was against the wall.

“You make me so mad.” he says through his teeth.

“You think I care? All you are is a monster.” You spit back. “So be the monster you are and drink up.”

You watch as his head tilts down a little, he bares his teeth and growls. It shoots right through you and your legs almost give out from underneath you. He lets go of you and you fall to your knees because you didn't expect him to let go so suddenly.

“You are weak.” You cough a little. “If you did your research on your life, you would know that it doesn't matter how much you drink from a source, it will never go out.” You manage to get onto your feet again, but it didn't matter because in seconds you were thrown onto the bed with Jimin on top.

“I was a sheltered boy. I am the King of All you know.” he says and turns my head and bite down without any warning or prepping. You being somewhat human, screams out in bloody murder. He wraps his arms around you and sits up. He is practically straddling you and hugging your body.

Jimin, he is hungry for you. As the blood seeps out of your neck into his mouth he falls into a state of darkness. He can't hear or see anything. All he knows is you and him. He knows that drinking right from your neck he is bound to get attached. Not like he can help it. He didn't know that you wouldn't die. He didn't really do much research on Healers. But he is willing to learn, he is willing to get attached, and to have you by his side.

What you didn't expect is that the pain turned to instant pleasure. You wrapped your arms around his waist, while his is around your shoulders.

“Ji-” you try to call out out to him, but he cuts you off by moaning against your neck, which causes a spike a pleasure to shoot through you. “Ahhhh fuck” You feel your body go limp with the occasional twitch.

You wonder how long he will go on for. Your blood will never run out as long as your heart is beating.

A couple of hours later, you were in your room that Jimin gave you by yourself. He left right after feeding, saying he stayed longer then he was suppose to. You were relieved he finally left, having time for yourself is always nice. There was a quick knock at the door, so you get up from the bed and go to open it. You see a young girl, not much younger than you standing there. She has a black knee length pleated skirt on with a black collared shirt tucked in, black shoes, but orange hair.

“Hi, I'm Lisa. I'm your maid servant, I will help you with whatever you need.” She says bowing her body 90 degrees. You just frown a little, nodding with acknowledgement. Who would've thought you would have your own maid.

“Let me guess, Jimin sent you.” You ask eyeing her. She smiles a little nodding her head once.

“In the closet there should be lots of clothes. You should refreshen and change clothes, then I will show you to the dining hall where there will be dinner.” She says nodding towards you, your room. “There should be a button next to your lamp on your bedside table. Push that and I will be here.” She then turns and leaves.

The thought of food made your stomach growl loudly. After the feeding and all of the drama you were starved. You went to the closet and she was right, there were lots of clothes. Simple clothes but pretty. In the bathroom there was a new toothbrush, still in it package and some other things to freshen up, you would take a shower before bed. Food first.

After, you put on some grey leggings and a white oversized shirt, that was probably meant for pajamas. You slide on some shoes, and look for the button she said was on the table. There was a remote with a big white button, you push it and put it back down. You go over to the vanity and brush your hair into a high ponytail. Soon enough there was a knock, you go over and open and she nods her head downwards, and she turns and starts to walk down the hall. You shut the door and follow her hoping there was good food.

You both walk through a tall door, and you see a long rectangular table, that could probably sit ten people and two on the ends. On one side was full of food, and the other was two empty plates one on the very end, and the other right next.

“Grab your plate, and fill it with what you’d like.” Lisa says and then she leave. Left before you could ask whos plate the second one was. You turn back to the table and almost shitted yourself when Jimin appeared in front of you.

“Are you ready to eat?” He smiles softly towards you.

“Um, can I just make my plate to my room?” You ask pointing at the door. Please say yes, please say yes.

“No, you will eat here.” he says moving out of your way, and the food half full with food is in your view. You sigh and roll your eyes walking over to grab one of the plates and grab your food. There was different types of salads and ramen. There was also meats, and rice and side dishes. You look up at Jimin on the other side and cock one of your brows at him. He looks confused, as if you offended him.

“I need blood to survive yes. But i'm not only vampire YN. I am a little bit of everything you know. It just so happen I was the one in the family that shows the wolf and vamp side more. The dog side lets me eat whatever.” You watch him as he gets a big helping on three different types of meat and a bowl of rice. You grab a little bit of everything and walk back down to the other side of the table. You noticed him standing waiting for you. You look over at the seat at the end of the table, it look like leather and some type of soft fur. In the middle of the chait it had huge J on it made with some type of silver. You just shake your head and sit two seats away.

“Of course you have your own special chair.” You mumble.

“Of course I do, what King doesn't.” he says smirking, you just scoff. After eating a little more, Jimin starts to speak.

“After we are done here, you need to meet some people.” He says wiping his mouth with a cloth napkin. You look up to him.

“Who?”

“Well, you have met some, but there are others. My side man, main fighter, friends. Just people you need to know because they will protect you as well.” he says scooping the rest of the rice in a big spoon and eating it.

“My family were the best hunters out here, I don't need your lame protection.” You scoff again pushing you plate to the side deciding that you were full. “You are the King of not some, but all. You out of all people have protection?” You explain. “Please, you should be able to protect yourself.” You roll your eyes at that.

“Look, I don't just magically get every ability of every creature I am. Some come, some go.” He stands up grabbing his cup. “You wouldn't know, you are just a lame Healer.”

“You are so dumb, you stand there eyes glowing white because of me and you are calling me lame. I literally have a huge effect on the King.” You watch him as he downs his drink.

“You don't understand what I can do.” Jimin mutters and walks away and out of the door. He makes you want to slam your head against the wall. Deep down there was this depression, because you knew that Jimin, he was your life now and you were his, literally. Also the fact that you were alone.

You knew you were not completely human, because you were a Healer. So it took a lot more to kill you. What he doesn't know, you hoped, was that when you were near death, he blood could heal you.

A couple of hours later Lisa came back to your room telling you that it was time to meet the main group of people that are around Jimin the most. You both make your way down a couple of different halls, and up a flight of stairs. You were just about to complain, until we show up next to some huge wooden double doors. Lisa walks up and knocks three times then opens. She stands back and lets you enter. When you do you didn't expect to see 7 grown men staring back at you. You felt like you were in a movie, because as soon as you walk in, there was a long black table. At the end was Jimin, and on either side were three men. The door shuts behind you as expected. You recognize a couple of them but you still don't say anything.

“YN.” Jimin says walking around the table and stands next to you. Everyone else stands and nods at you.

“You've met Namjoon. He usually helps me make decisions because he knows what's best for me and the worlds. Especially when I can't control myself.” He points to Namjoon, which he smiles and nods to you.

“Next is Jungkook and Hoseok, they are trainers. Helps with the fighting and control. Then Jin, the ‘nurse-”

“Yah! I like to be called a Doctor!” He cuts Jimin off. Jimin just smiles and continues.

“Then there is Taehyung who is a wolf, and Yoongi who is a witch.”

“Warlock.” The black hair, shorter man deadpans.

“Overall, they are my best friends no matter the role.” Jimin smiles.

“Ahh, it is true about your eyes.” Taehyung says walking right up to Jimin getting a good look. “It's weird because I can see where your pupils start but they are also white.”

“How much do you love your most valuable parts?” Jimin hisses, and with that Taehyung scurries back to his seat.

“Great, nice to meet you all. Bye now.” You say with a straight face, and you turn to leave wanting some sleep. But a hand holds you back. You turn back and see Jimin holding onto your upper arm. You pull yourself away from him not wanting the feeling of the tingles effect you.

“I actually wanted to check your back if that's okay.” Jin says walking up to you with his hands behind his back.

“No that is not okay. I know how my body works, I'll be fine.” You say standing your guard. Jin doesn't say anything back shocked that you actually rejected his request.

“Do you have to be so difficult?” Jimin asks looking at you like you were crazy.

“Can I leave?” You shoot back placing your hands on your hips.

“Do you want me to die?!” He yells at you “How can you be so selfish??!” You almost wanted to laugh in his face. Did he really ask you such a question.

“I. Don’t. Care.” You say each step it takes to get into his face. You notice that when you get closer, little black veins start to pop up around the bottom of his eyes.

“Yn, he can't control himself around you yet.” You hear Namjoons voice from behind you. You noticed that Jungkook and Hoseok go behind Jimin, probably just in case anything happens.

You look up at Jimin's face again and see that he is just staring at you, not really doing anything. But the veins next to his eyes were a lot more prominent than two seconds ago. He stands there stiff.

You goto say something, but then remember on detail. You turn and look at Namjoon.

“I want to see this machine you have that can recreate my blood.” You say crossing your arms.  But to your surprise he looks shocked.

“I would like to see as well, because last time I remembered we can't recreate blood, especially healers.” Namjoon explains. You head snaps back to Jimin. His eyes were closed and he takes a couple of deep breathes. When his eyes open they were pitch black and he looks directly at Namjoon.

“You’re so dead.” He mumbles groaning and snaps to attack him, but with your instinct you put yourself in front of him and push him back with most of your strength. He didn't expect you to just jump out in front, so he stumbles a little grabbing on to your shoulders making his knees buckles bringing you down with him. His heavy breathing confused you.

“Holy shit, she just stopped him with a little touch.” You hear, and look up to see Hoseok stunned above you.

“You make me so weak, how?” Jimin mutters looking up at you. His eyes again shining bright white, but he looks sad and confused. “How can some random healer stop me. The King of ALL?!” he yells the last part. Jungkook and Hoseok come and lift him up from under the armpit and bring him to a chair. You were also confused. Why did that happen? We were connected somehow, and you didn't like it.

You got up acting unphased by what happened.

“Namjoon, if it isn't to much to ask-”

“You won't even let me check your back and now you ask a favor??!” Jin cuts in. You hold your tongue and continue talking to Namjoon.

“It involves your King, I think we are connected in some way. Maybe since i'm a healer, I can also drain?” You question. “I don't know. But I don't like this and I'm betting you all don't either.”

“Actually, i'm way ahead of you. This was one of the things I wanted to tell you today.” He says walking over to Jimin. “See, Jimin is the King of All, meaning the most powerful being. Well, he's getting to that point. If you still don't understand, let's take Christianity for a moment or any religion that involves God and the Devil. They are just another supernatural being compared to him.”

“You literally just tried to tell me that Jimin is more powerful than the Devil AND God?”

“...Because he is.” he deadpan. You couldn't help but to let out a little laugh.

“You have got to be kidding me.” You sigh. He just shakes his head.

“Like i was saying, he hold more evil in him then good. So just like there is girl and boy, yes and no, there is a good and evil.” He explains...Jimin snaps his head up to him. He looks back and forth frantically between Namjoon and I.

“So what are you trying to say?” You ask him getting nervous.

“You are the Good.”

[eyeodyssey]

Film Production Log #3

A frame from “The Death Of A Home″. What year is this? It’s been a long time coming that I finally got around to writing another one of these things. It’s three months into 2019 already and I hardly even noticed, made a rude awakening when I looked to the calendar to see that it went from 28 back to 1. With all that, it hit me that I hardly wrote about the progression of any of my current film projects in that period of time. I thought I had a rough idea of how the passage of time worked, as it turns out I know as little about a concept as abstract as time as I do about every other thing in life that defies explanation. There’s a reason why I simultaneously dread everything and nothing after all. I’ve written through many variants of this first paragraph beforehand, each draft starting off with the same “long time coming” comment, which gained further relevancy with each rewrite. Let’s go and cut this ongoing habit before it goes beyond simple procrastination into flat out absurdity.

A frame from “The Death Of A Home″. Like mentioned with the second production log, we spent most of the December of 2018 haphazardly preparing a forced move that we had to undergo with the sudden gentrification of our apartment at the time. This wasn’t the first time I faced the systematic Kafkaesque horror of gentrification. I was pissed, to say the least, and I did the only thing I could do, I documented it. With The Death Of A Home as it is currently, all the footage from the move itself has been compiled and made into a rough cut, adding up to my first proper feature length film at an hour and 12 minutes. The film is comprised of long shots, with scenes ranging from a crew of biohazard workers cleaning the basement of a black mold infestation that was never reported to the tenants to a sequence where long kept hand-painted furniture is forcibly discarded (tossed down a staircase into the back lot to lead to a rain of multicolored paint shards). The whole film will also be accompanied by a harsh noise soundtrack, I mostly have Merzbow stuff playing throughout as a placeholder. I’ll be shooting on the side some abstract visual sequences for the documentary, communicating certain details of our story that weren’t captured on film. I have a lot of ideas brewing for the mixed media techniques I could use for creating these images in a live action format, specifically ones that return to the sort of trash bag special effects that I used in my prior film concerning the subject of gentrification, Weightless Bird In A Falling Cage. Setting foot in the new apartment, the first thing we came to notice was the absolutely vacant house next to us. The building was completely abandoned with electricity still hooked up, looked like no one set foot there in years. Having it face the bedroom every day, with our constant visual subjection and time to contemplate we came to the conclusion that something was gonna happen to the building at some point. It was clearly the middle child to an estate that left it to rot. Just in time for when we wrapped up unboxing everything, the building caught fire. At first I didn’t pay much mind to the sound of sirens driving through (it’s an Atlanta custom). It eventually hit me that something wasn’t quite right when I looked to one of the windows to see bright red, Suspiria technicolor light shining through.

A frame from “Burning Fragments: Mode 3 - Winter 2019″. Did I go out to have a look? Of course, so did the rest of the neighborhood. Made an interesting meet your neighbor type of gathering, to say the least. I also brought my camera with me, and I came back with a metaphorical stack of raw footage along with a slow-cooked pair of lungs, the film is more important though. From that raw footage, I got the visual edit for the short Burning Fragments, a part of my seasonal “Mode” series that was first kicked off by Hard Drive and continued by my currently unreleased Factory Dreams. Burning Fragments is a montage of morbidly humbling sequences, from a roof visibly caving in through the smoking windows to medical staff cautiously carting out a stretcher, prepared for the worst case scenario. No one came out injured luckily, though I don’t mention that in the film (to keep up the haunting atmosphere). Power was cut to the building, the fire was put out and the street stunk of smoke for the next month. I thought it smelt like a smoked rib, one neighbor of ours said it smelt exactly like pot smoke.

A frame from “Factory Dreams: Mode 2 - Fall 2018″. Right around there was where we thought the story would end, but several days later the building went back up again. This time around I went to one of the firefighters to ask what started the fire in the first place. As it turned out this second eruption was from the ongoing work of someone who had a great disdain to a singular sofa in the abandoned building. The first fire was started off by the arsonist setting this certain sofa aflame, and the guy returned to the scene of the crime to incinerate it for good. Our friendly neighborhood sofa arsonist is still on the run to this day. Going into rapid-fire mode, some other noteworthy moments of the year so far include: OS updating, film editor street fighting, more OS updating, cool experimental film screenings (as seen in my documentary Moonlight Tunnel), one last OS update for good measure and discovering the new OS is as thought out as a tumble down a staircase.

Kafka’s Supermarket sorta ended up bunched between everything, seeing one quick, sporadic development at a time. The issue with actors still stands, gotta track down some people for the film to act in those pesky performed segments. It all goes smoothly until you’ve gotta spend the time and physical resources of other living, fleshy beings into your freaky unscripted cinematic daydreams. Around the end of February, I collaborated with local collage artists Steven and Cassi Cline to write the dialogue for the film, collage literature style. We took several different approaches when it came to fully fleshing things out, some were done as experimental writing games while others were the more familiar cut n paste technique. The script took a wide variety of resources, including the FBI documents printed from the internet archive, the prologue of a Georges Bataille philosophical text and a book on nuclear weapons. I was largely the supplier when it came to the process, while I do visual collage stuff often I’m less of a writer (both letter by letter and cut up source by cut up source). Readings of the literary collages will be interspersed throughout the film with an announcer who seems completely detached from the surreal nature of the scenes he describes. Burroughs’ approach for writing Naked Lunch aside, the primary source of inspiration for this detail comes from my memories of a radio clock that we had during my childhood. I would tune through channels with it searching for classical music, but most often I’d find news stations. Not knowing anything about politics at the time (being 5 to 6 years old and all), the nature of what was being discussed was completely alien to me. With how Kafka’s Supermarket is focused on the nightmarish distortion of everyday life in capitalist America, I felt it was necessary to recreate the atmosphere of those broadcasts that confused me all those many years ago. One detail that left the production hung for a significant amount of time, as minuscule as it may seem, was the masks the actors would be wearing. The visual style of Kafka’s Supermarket was adapted from my 2017 zine What Brought Me To This Point, an experiment in nihilistic writing that focuses on the mental state of a man with prosopagnosia and a non-specified mental illness. My general understanding of prosopagnosia at the time was admittedly limited, I had just heard of a condition where someone couldn’t recognize faces and something about the idea creatively resonated. From this, all the characters were designed with the same basic facial template, prioritizing the bare essentials of the human face with an emphasis on the uncanny. Kafka’s Supermarket further branches out this aesthetic in using it as a wider embodiment of the lack of individual personality in a capitalist state, where everything is selling to a set of categorized markets that represent the general populace.

A frame from “Kafka’s Supermarket”. The thing is, human heads aren’t structured like these figures I was drawing. I spent an absurdly long time contemplating how exactly I could recreate the look of these characters not only with a budget but with a budget without having it look too “store-bought” in a way. The main catch was I was going by realism and not surrealism. At that point, I briefly lost sight of what exactly I was doing. We all make mistakes. I brooded on how I could convincingly recreate an abstract illustration. It took until I started reading the screenplays of Kōbō Abe that sense hit me again when I questioned how it would be done in a theater production. That was when I remember that I’m making a non-narrative experimental film, not something like a superhero fan film where a certain level of suspension of disbelief is expected. Since then I plotted out an alternative that’s simultaneously more affordable than anything I was theorizing beforehand while also being more surreal and true to the theories and atmosphere behind Kafka’s Supermarket (and even it’s predecessor, What Brought Me To This Point). Since then I’ve found myself further experimenting with the fusion of film and theater, specifically the use of minimal props and images to convey a greater concept. I’ll be reposting cast calls for actors through the next several days, hoping for the best while I also simultaneously pester a nearby grocery store for permission to shoot a short sequence on their property. Productions like this are the ones that leave me realizing the oxymoronic nature in pursuing capitalist chains about the production of strictly anti-capitalist cinematic rhetoric.

A frame from “Empire Of Madness: A Wilderness Within Hell 2″. While juggling well more than a handful of personal projects (all the films mentioned earlier, a second chapter of Iron Logs and a harsh noise album experiment), I also convinced myself that I can get back into animation again. I was publicly tiptoeing around the idea of a second Wilderness Within Hell film for a while, and now it seems that it will likely be a thing with Empire Of Madness. It’s not really a direct sequel as much as it is a continuation of the style that was first started with Madhouse Mitchel. Set in the same age of industrial totalitarian inferno as Madhouse Mitchel, Empire Of Madness follows the life of Prometheus after his divine punishment for giving mankind knowledge. Having finally passed physical torture in the complete separation of his physical body, Prometheus wanders the Earth as an anomalous figure that assembles itself in a seemingly manufactured, mechanical nature. With pieces of his blood and flesh inherited by every man and woman with his given wisdom, he is inconsequently responsible for a curse put on all of humanity that destines man to collapse in paranoia and violence. Prometheus is shunned by everyone who crosses his path, seeing him as a sickly demon. Prometheus comes to realize that aside from his physical torture, the true act of divine punishment enacted on him will be the experience of having his own creation slowly destroy itself while it collectively tries to kill him.

A frame from “Empire Of Madness: A Wilderness Within Hell 2″. I’m simultaneously writing the film’s screenplay while I draw certain visual intensive scenes. Like I mentioned I’m still a bit rough around the edges with writing, so for this phase of production, I’ll actively study Kōbō Abe’s scripts and also the screenplays to an Akira Kurosawa film and Battleship Potemkin. I’ll still in a way aim more to minimalism with how certain things play out, with this series’ influences in Japanese guro art it’s more inclined to create a certain nightmarish atmosphere above all else. While Madhouse was largely anti-systemic rage, this film leans more to bleak existentialism. Bits of the soundtrack are already recorded, the main theme can currently be heard here. That’s about all I have to write for now. Now to wait another four months until I post anything text based on here again.

[hotsterfield]

World War 3 pt. 2 - H.O.

Word count: 2594

Summary: When you move back to London to be Tom Holland’s personal trainer, you didn’t expect to run into your ex. And you definitely didn’t expect things to go the way they did.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4| Part 5 | Part 6 | Epilogue

Masterlist

A/N: Part 2! I had a lot of fun writing this one, so i hope you enjoy it! If you want to be added to the taglist, just let me know! And any feedback is always appreciated! 

“Harrison should be joining us, so i think he’ll be here soon” Tom said, as you stepped into the empty fitness centre. It was 8 in the morning, and even though you were both jetlagged, you were still going to work out. But with the mention of Harrison, all eagerness about it disappeared. “I think you got off of the wrong foot yesterday, but I’m sure today will be better”

“I don’t know. He seems like a prick, if I’m being honest” You answered. There was no chance you were ever getting on friendly terms with him, but you could at least pretend for Tom.

“I know. He’s not good with girls. Well, he’s not good with girls, when he’s not trying to sleep with them. His ex really hurt him, and i think it messed him up a little bit. He just needs a little time to get to know you” Tom explained, and you had to hold back a laugh. You hurt him? You messed him up? He was the one who was hurt? What an idiot!

“I know, i know. Just give him a chance, right?” You rolled your eyes with a smile. At least Tom realised Harrison was acting like a jerk, right?

“Please?” He looked at you with the puppy eyes, and you were already rolling your eyes at him.

“Only because you look adorable” You laughed, as his face fell at the words.

“I’m not adorable! We’ve talked about this, Y/n. Not adorable” He pouted, only adding to the puppy look.

“Sweetheart, that’s why I’m here, remember? To make you hot, instead of adorable” You smiled. “Which is why we should get started” You walked over to the treadmill, and started running.

“So what exactly are we doing today? I mean, what do you want me to warm up?” Tom asked, walking to the treadmill next to yours.

“Hey! Sorry I’m late. There was more traffic than i thought” Harrison’s voice sounded behind you, and he was already making you annoyed.

“We start on the combat for Spider-Man. Or, we start with the basic moves at least” You explained Tom, as you stepped up the speed.

“Already? But there’s still so long till we shoot! I haven’t even gotten the script yet” Tom complained. He was never a fan of having to memorise all of the choreography.

“I sure as hell didn’t move to this cold place if I could’ve just handed you a trainings program” You shot him a look, while keeping up the speed. You still weren’t sure why you had decided to go, but it was too late to back out now. “Besides, Marvel thinks it would be good for you to learn the basics of martial arts”

“Wait, so you’re going to actually teach me how to fight? Not just the stuff for the scenes?” Tom asked, suddenly much more interested.

“Yes, it makes it look more real” You were starting to feel your pulse, and you could see Tom getting warm as well. You didn’t really bother looking at Harrison.

“So we’ll be actually fighting today? It’s been a while since we’ve spared” Tom got a wide smile on his face. The last time you spared, he gotten closer to winner than before, so he thought he might actually have a chance.

“Sure. Then i can see where we should start. And since he’s here, maybe you could spar with Harrison as well” You had no idea how Harrison was with fighting, but you had a feeling Tom would win, and you wouldn’t mind watching Harrison on the floor. You were both looking over at Harrison, who didn’t even react to the mention of his name.

“How do you feel about that Harrison?” Tom asked, still not getting a reaction. “Haz!”

“What? Sorry, i wasn’t listening” Harrison turned his attention to Tom, not even acknowledging you.

“We were just talking about doing some sparring. What do you think about that?” Tom asked again.

“With you, or with her?” Harrison asked, eyebrows raised. “Because I’ve seen you box, and i don’t want to go up against that”

“Do you want to go up against me? Are you sure about that? That you would rather fight me than Tom?” You asked in disbelief. Had he really not heard anything you just said?

“I might think i have a better chance, yeah. Just looking between the two of you, i think you would be much easier to take down. No offense, of course” His mouth was smiling, but his eyes were shooting daggers at you. Tom was looking at you with excited eyes, and anyone could tell that he wanted this to happen.

“Alright. I’m almost done warming up” You were starting to sweat, and right now you wanted nothing more than to kick his ass.

“Great, me too” Some minutes passed. and you both ended your warm up. You got out to the open space in the middle of the floor and got ready.You briefly explained him what was going to happen, and mentally prepared for this.

“I mean it! I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself!” You argued.

“And I’m just saying i could take you down anytime!” He sent you a cheeky smile, before getting closer to you. You backed away, knowing there was a good chance that he was right. You stopped in your tracks, when your bag hit the wall. “See princess? I already have you up against the wall”

“Sorry, but I’m not having my first time against the wall” You couldn’t help but laugh at the double meaning of his words.  You had a dirty mind, you had always had, and Harrison knew that too well. He loved making you laugh. Just seeing you happy made his stomach curl together.

“Well you’re the one who brought it up” He joked, making his way to you painfully slow. The cheeky smile was still on his lips, when he trapped you between his arms. “Now, tell me? How does the princess plan on getting out of this?”

“Like this” You smiled, ducked under his right arm, standing next to him. “I can always get away from you”

“Not when i do this you can’t” He bit his lip, placing one hand on your back and the other behind your knees, before lifting you off of your feet and carrying you to the bed.

“No!! Let me go!” You screamed punching his chest playfully.

“Are you sure?” He asked, lifting you a little higher in the air, faster than you would like, making you wrap your arms around his neck in panic. “You want me to let go?”

“Please don’t” You grabbed on to him thighter, and he just smiled.

“What happened to “I can always get away”? Because right now you’re not getting away” He had a glint in his eyes. “Not until I do this” He let go of you, and let you fall down on the bed.

“See? I got away” You giggled, and he quickly jumped onto the bed with you. He laid himself on top of you, making you squirm under him.

“But did you really?” He smirked, as he watched you struggle. You had had small fights before, or pretend fights rather, and he would always win. This time you had decided to change that.

“What if i don’t want to get away?” You asked flirtingly, before stretching your head up towards his. He got the hint, and leaned down, connecting your lips and getting lost in the feeling. As soon as he lost his focus, you pushed his shoulder, flipping you around. “Or maybe, i just play by different rules”

“Princess. You fooled me” He acted offended, and his heart skipped a beat when he saw the smile of triumph on your lips. He let the moment last just a little longer, before he once again flipped you around, and this time pinning your arms down too. “But you have to do better than that”

“Alright! You win!” You gave up after a short while of fighting. He was much stronger than you, and you knew you would never get out of his grip. He just smiled at down at you, before kissing you once again.

At first the kiss was playful, like it so often were. He would ever so often parten your lips, and whisper “i love you”’s inbetween. The more times the words left the tip of his tounge, the more the kiss changed. It become more passionate and more loving. You were both getting completely lost in each other.

He let go of your hands, and supported his own weight, allowing you to go deeper into the kiss. You sat up a little, your hands finding their way under his shirt, sending shivers down his spine. You had done it before, but this time your hands went lower than they had ever done.

“Are you sure? You really want to do this?” He asked breathless. You felt nervous, but you weren’t uncertain. The only feeling you had in your body in that moment, was love. You had been going out for a while now, and you knew you loved him. You loved him more than you could ever love anyone.

“Yes. I want this” You looked into those wonderful blue eyes. Those blue eyes that you could never get tired of looking into.

“I just don’t want to pressure you into anything. I want to do this in your pace” He looked so serious, searching your face for any sign that you didn’t want to go all the way,

“And that’s why I’m sure” You smiled, pulling him in for another kiss, you hands finding their way to the hem of his jeans, fumbling a little with the button.

He pushed you down on the,, while he straightened up, straddling you. His shirt went over his head, and the sight of his slightly toned abs, made you lick your lips. He opened his jeans, and quickly left the bed to take them off, leaving him in his black boxers.

You sat up, lifting your own shirt over your head. Harrison crawled back onto the bed, and slid you jeans off of your legs, and throwing them to the remain clothes on the floor. He looked you up and down, a loving smile on his lips.

“God, i love how your underwear never match” He laughed, looking at the pink panties and the black bra. If you had known how this afternoon would end, you would’ve matched your underwear this morning, a thing you never did, and a thing that you didn’t realise he had noticed. With a smirk on your lips, you opened the claps on your bra, and threw it to the side. “I take that back. I love it when you don’t wear it”

“You’re such a dork” You laughed. He started kissing your stomach, slowly making his way up between your breasts. His hot breath on your skin gave you goosebumps. You felt him suck on the skin around your collarbone. “You better not be giving me a hickey!”

“Too late, princess” He smirked, lifting his face up on level with yours. He put his weight on you, making you fall down on the mattress. His right hand caressing your skin, as it made its way inside your panties. “You know you can tell me stop, and i will, right?”

“Hazzy, i love you. I don’t want you to stop” You assured him, connecting with his lips once again. You gasped when his cold fingers made contact with your sensitive skin. His tongue made it’s way into your mouth, playing with yours.

Like so many times before, his fingers went to work, rubbing small circles on your clit. Suddenly would change the way, or just make a unexpected movement with his fingers, causing you to moan into your heated kiss.

Your hips would start grinding up against him, wanting more friction than you were getting. The lack of fabric between you, made it possible for you to feel him growing under his boxers. His fingers made their way longer down to your entrance, making their way inside of you. Just his two fingers felt like a lot inside of you, and you started to feel the nerves. Would he even fit in you?

He spread his fingers a little, trying to stretch you out a little more, before adding another finger. He took his time, making sure weren’t in any discomfort.

“Are you ready?” He asked, a little out of breath.

“I’m ready” You smiled up at him, as he once again left the bed. This time to remove the last to pieces of fabric covering your bodys, and put on a condom.

He found his way back the bed, placing himself before you. The tip of him teased you, before going inside of you. He gave you time to adjust, and he moved as slow as he possibly could. It took a little time getting used to the new feeling, but when he started moving, you started enjoying it.

“Go faster” you panted, feelings your hips rock to his rhythm.

He speed up the pace, and closed his eyes. He tried to get some words out of his mouth, but he wasn’t able to form the words. All he could get out was grunts and moans. You leaned your head back, feeling the climax getting closer.

“H-Hazzy” You moaned, your legs starting to shake.  You could feel his thrusts getting a little slower and more sloppy.

“Uh-huh” Was all he could get out. His thrusts stopped, as he came in the condom, and pulled out of you. He took a moment to collect himself, before noticing that you weren’t quite over the edge yet. His fingers found their way back to your clit, rubbing in unpredictable patterns. His fingers kept going, even when your orgasm started, and he didn’t stop till he was sure you were done.

“I love you”

You wanted to beat him this time. For all of the times you had lost in a pretend fight. It had been so long, and you knew he didn’t stand a chance. You hadn’t been in Los Angeles for long, before you joined a centre. You were so angry, so you took up different martial arts as an outlet. Turned out you were a quick learner.

“Don’t worry Harrison. I’ll only use self-defense” You promised with a smirk.

“I think i can handle you, princess” He almost spat the nickname, making your blood boil. You hated that petname.

“Just get to it” You said coldly. He did as told, and tried to get a hit in somewhere. There was not really any technic behind it, but you managed to dodge every move. You threw in a few punches, nothing hard, but enough to annoy him.

“Is that the best you got? I can hardly feel it” He said out of breath. You knew he was getting frustrated, which only made you send him a smile.

“You want the best I’ve got?” You asked. You heard Tom laugh in the background.

“I want you to give it everything” His tried to step in for another punch, and with ease you kicked his feet off the floor. He landed on the floor with a thud, and you quickly pinned him down. “Ow”

“I win” You smirked at him, before getting up. He just groaned in response, not satisfied with the outcome. “And don’t ever call me princess again”

Tell me what you think!/ Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!

TAGLIST

@rock-n-roll-queens @m-sterre @exclusively-inclusive@rock-n-roll-queens @exclusively-inclusive @behxndthemask@stephie-senpai @gaiasambuci @ilvermornyqueen @waywardswain @marvelouslyme96 @minstrel-axx @hollanderheart @satellitesweetpea @itstabata @hazadan @amidblogger @spider-mendes @mediocrefangirlaestheticslove @falling-stars-never-cry @my-unique-mind @misformarvel @thewiseandfree