#only one person understands how much they mean to me

[jiminomenon]

model! karina taking care of sick assistant! reader

pairing: model! karina x assistant! female reader

word count: 1.6k words

summary: after days of absence, jimin assumes her new assistant, y/n, has quit like all the others—much to her frustration. determined to confront her, jimin shows up at y/n’s apartment unannounced, only to find her bedridden with a high fever. as jimin begrudgingly takes care of her, the two begin to understand each other in ways neither expected, softening the edges of their fiery relationship.

from my series: the devil wears prada

jimin’s day had already been a disaster.

the designer she was supposed to meet canceled at the last minute, her favorite coffee shop got her order wrong, and to top it all off, y/n—her brand-new assistant—hadn’t shown up to work for the past three days.

sitting in her pristine, sunlit penthouse, jimin scrolled furiously through her phone, her jaw tight with irritation. no texts, no calls, no excuses. just radio silence.

“unbelievable,” she muttered, tossing her phone onto the coffee table and crossing her arms. she’d hired y/n on a whim, thinking the sharp-tongued assistant could handle her demands better than the revolving door of incompetents before her. it wasn’t just the job that made people quit—it was her.

she was aware of her reputation: bratty, spoiled, the daughter of some chaebol family who never worked a day in her life until she got bored enough to pursue modeling. but jimin had fought hard to prove she wasn’t just her parents’ money. she worked long hours, pushed herself through grueling shoots, and demanded perfection from everyone around her. if that made her a little harsh, so be it.

still, y/n wasn’t supposed to quit. not like this.

“she said she wasn’t like the others,” jimin mumbled, kicking off her heels and pacing the room. “she looked me dead in the eye and said, ‘i’m not scared of you.’ so what happened? couldn’t even last a week?” she threw her hands up, annoyed at how much this was bothering her.

her other assistants barely lasted a month, but at least they had the courtesy to formally resign. y/n’s silence felt like a betrayal. she’d let herself believe, for once, that she’d found someone who wouldn’t crumble under her demands.

after another ten minutes of stewing in her frustration, jimin grabbed her keys. “fine. if she won’t come to work, i’ll bring work to her.”

jimin found herself standing outside a run-down apartment building that was nothing like the high-rise luxury she was used to. she wrinkled her nose as she climbed the stairs, the paint chipping off the walls and the faint smell of something fried wafting through the halls.

when she reached y/n’s door, she knocked sharply, her patience already worn thin. when no one answered, she knocked again, louder this time.

“y/n, open up!” she called, her voice echoing through the hallway.

finally, the door creaked open, and jimin froze.

y/n stood there, leaning heavily against the frame, her face pale and damp with sweat. her usually sharp, confident demeanor was gone, replaced by someone who looked weak and exhausted. she was wrapped in a blanket, her hair disheveled, and her eyes struggled to focus.

“ms. yu?” y/n croaked, her voice barely above a whisper.

jimin blinked, her irritation melting into confusion. “what… what’s wrong with you?”

“i’m sorry,” y/n murmured, clutching the doorframe to steady herself. “i didn’t mean to disappear. i’ve been really sick, and my phone—” she trailed off, coughing weakly into her hand.

“you’re sick?” jimin repeated, her voice softer now.

y/n nodded, her gaze dropping to the floor. “i wanted to let you know, but… i couldn’t even get out of bed. my phone’s dead, and i—” she broke off, her legs wobbling beneath her.

jimin stepped forward instinctively, steadying her. “hey, hey, sit down before you pass out.”

she guided y/n back into the apartment, closing the door behind her. the space was small but cozy, filled with warm tones and personal touches—books stacked on the coffee table, a knitted throw draped over the couch, and photos pinned to a corkboard on the wall. it was a far cry from jimin’s sleek, minimalist penthouse, but it felt… lived-in.

y/n collapsed onto the couch, her blanket still wrapped tightly around her. jimin crossed her arms, looking down at her. “why didn’t you call someone? a doctor? a friend?”

“didn’t want to bother anyone,” y/n mumbled, her eyes fluttering closed.

jimin let out an exasperated sigh, running a hand through her hair. “you’re ridiculous. so ridiculous. do you know how worried I was? i thought you quit! i thought you were just like everyone else!”

y/n opened one eye, a faint smile tugging at her lips despite her condition. “you were worried about me?”

“don’t make this weird,” jimin snapped, though her tone lacked its usual bite. “stay here. i’m getting medicine.”

“you don’t have to—”

“shut up and rest.”

when jimin returned an hour later, her arms were full of shopping bags. she’d gone all out—cold medicine, fever patches, soup, electrolyte drinks, even a plush blanket she’d seen at the store and decided y/n needed.

she moved around the apartment like she owned the place, heating up the soup and pouring a glass of water. y/n watched her from the couch, her face a mix of gratitude and amusement.

“you’re really bad at being mean, you know that?” y/n said weakly.

jimin shot her a glare, setting the tray down on the coffee table. “don’t get used to this. i’m only doing this because i need you healthy and back at work. you’re the first assistant i’ve had who doesn’t cry when i yell at them.”

“aww, you care,” y/n teased, her voice hoarse.

“eat your soup before i pour it on your head,” jimin grumbled, though the corner of her lips twitched upward.

as y/n ate, jimin sat beside her, scrolling through her phone but occasionally glancing over to make sure she was drinking enough water or taking her medicine. the apartment was quiet except for the soft hum of the heater and the occasional sound of y/n’s spoon clinking against the bowl.

“thank you,” y/n said softly after a while, her eyes heavy with sleep.

jimin waved her off, trying to hide the warmth creeping up her neck. “just get better, okay? i don’t have time to look for another assistant.”

y/n smiled faintly as she drifted off, her breathing evening out. jimin stayed where she was, watching her for a moment before leaning back against the couch with a sigh.

the silence in the apartment was comforting. jimin sat at the small dining table, absently scrolling through her phone as y/n finally drifted off into a feverish sleep. the earlier chaos—the confrontation, the unexpected discovery that y/n wasn’t the flake jimin had assumed—still echoed in her head.

her thoughts wandered back to their first meeting. jimin had sized y/n up within seconds, assuming she wouldn’t last more than a week. sure, she looked determined enough, but determination didn’t mean much when you were thrown into the chaos of jimin’s world. still, something about the way y/n had spoken—timid at first but sharper as the day progressed—had intrigued her.

and that first confrontation. jimin chuckled softly to herself, remembering the way y/n had stood her ground, staring her down while everyone else cowered. it had been the first time in a long time that someone dared to challenge her, and it had left an impression she wasn’t willing to admit out loud.

she glanced over at y/n now, curled up in her blanket, her features softened in sleep. it was strange, seeing her like this—vulnerable, quiet. the fire that usually lit up her eyes was dimmed by exhaustion, but it hadn’t gone out entirely.

“you’re ridiculous,” jimin muttered under her breath, more to herself than to y/n.

after a moment of hesitation, she stood and began moving around the apartment again, tidying up where she could. she wasn’t used to this—helping someone else. sure, she had assistants, stylists, and an entire team dedicated to making her life easier, but she’d never actually cared about the well-being of any of them.

maybe it was because y/n didn’t treat her like some untouchable star. she called jimin out on her nonsense, pushed back when she went too far, and didn’t seem to care about her status or her wealth. jimin wasn’t used to that.

she paused by the couch, watching as y/n shifted slightly in her sleep, mumbling something incoherent. without thinking, jimin reached down and adjusted the blanket, making sure it covered her properly.

“you better get better soon,” she said softly, her voice barely above a whisper. “i’m not doing all this for nothing.”

when morning came, y/n woke to the smell of something warm and delicious. her eyes fluttered open, and she saw jimin standing in the tiny kitchenette, stirring something on the stove.

“are you…making breakfast?” y/n croaked, her voice hoarse.

jimin glanced over her shoulder, her expression as sharp as ever. “what else would it be? i’m not exactly a gourmet chef, but even i can handle instant soup.”

y/n tried to sit up, but jimin was at her side in an instant, gently pushing her back down. “don’t even think about it. you’re staying in bed until you’re better.”

“ms. yu, you don’t have to—”

“shut up,” jimin interrupted, her tone light but firm. “i already told you, i need you back at work. the sooner you recover, the sooner you can start making my life easier again.”

y/n managed a small smile, her heart warming despite her exhaustion. “thanks, ms. yu. really.”

“don’t thank me,” jimin said, setting a bowl of soup on the table beside her. “just don’t make me regret hiring you, okay?”

y/n chuckled weakly. “no promises.”

as jimin settled back into the chair, her arms crossed and her usual haughty demeanor firmly in place, y/n realized something. the train ride to seoul had been the start of a dream, but it wasn’t the city or the job that made it feel real. it was this—finding her place, finding someone like jimin, who made her want to push back, fight harder, and stand her ground.

[maxisodenoth]

Oops, forgot to block.

But anyways, it seems like you don't understand.

Let me put it like this for you.

You have been provided links with proof [that I'm sure you didn't even touch.] And instead of bringing up any point related to them you stick to your same arguments.

I asked you a simple yes or no question, and you seem to have taken it personally. It doesn't matter to me what you think the answer is, because the answer is always no. An infertile woman is just as much of a woman as any other. We are what we want to be. Your words mean nothing to me, and other peoples identity. [which let me remind you *again* that you've been provided links in the comments which explain this stuff better than I ever could]

[And let me tell you something. Just because we can't have kids right now doesn't mean it'll remain that way in the future. I believe that something will be figured out later in the future that will allow trans-people to be able to reproduce with their new reproductive apparatuses. Whether that takes years or decades doesn't matter. It'll happen.]

You used word meanings as "arguments". May I remind you that, words were created far before any research was done on this matter? [Not exaclty sure when or how much words change but I'm almost sure it's a pretty slow process, so they might be a bit or alot outdated. Not sure though.] And that maybe instead of etymology, you should be looking at psychology, and biology? [Links in the comments~] Trying to use words meanings as arguments doesn't really work out that well when we're not talking about words but people.

[And by the way. Where is your evidence? You've been provided links explaining this stuff, yet when pressed, you only choose to go to ... a dictionary? Really?]

[Also, since you've stooped into insults let me get in on that action.]

Why do you care so much? Like really. Why does this matter that much to you? Are you that miserable that the only joy you get is by hating on other people being themselves and happy?

Look, I know it's hard to find a purpose in life, or a job, but it'd be alot easier if you stopped being a prick and just let people be themselves. There's no reason to hate people who literally don't affect you in any shape or form. They're just being themselves. Cope. [Your final reminder that there are links in the comments!~]

Or do you just refuse to grow up and understand that it doesn't matter what you say. People will be themselves and happier than you will ever be?

I am not a debator. I'm just some angry penguin on the internet. I have left my piece here. And I won't forget to block this time. May this be the last time I see your miserable blog on my feed.

And for everyone else who comes across this post, trans or otherwise. Your identity is Valid. You know yourselves better than some stranger on the internet. Or anyone who's not you. Because it's Your Identity. Not these peoples.

Do not let the hateful words of bigots make you feel bad about youself. You are the only one who can choose your identity. Not some idiots on the internet. You. And let me say this again Your identity is always valid. No matter what others say. ❤️

Goodbye. 👋

[Even if you reply to this, I'm not wasting anymore of my time on you John. You've been given links, read them. The same goes for any asshole who wants to start another argument. I do not care for you. Find someone else to deal with your bullshit.]

Facts matter. #VoteBlue

[gamorahww]

𝐅𝐈𝐘𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐁𝐀 𝐅𝐄𝐁𝐑𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐘 ━ 𝑑𝑎𝑦 2. 𝑑𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑜𝑟 𝑐𝑎𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔

Today I'm holding space for the idea that in the context of the movie, dancing is a coping mechanism for Fiyero. While caring is a cure and a solution and an answer. I mean it is nothing new, but it needs to be said.

There will be a separate post on Dancing Through Life later today, but for now, we're starting from later. At history class, Fiyero voluntarily steps up to help the lion cub, and they make it all the way to the forest. Shortly after they are safe, and start talking, Elphaba says, "I know my life would be much easier if I didn't care, but—" and Fiyero cuts her off at exactly this point in her sentence. And I think that moment is crucial. Up until now, he’s never interrupted her before—but now he does and not because he’s frustrated with how much she talks, but because of what she’s saying. He doesn’t want to hear her talk about caring. That’s a pain point for him.

Because he knows it’s easier not to care. That’s the story he tells himself.

The lyrics in Dancing Through Life go: "Why think too hard when it's so soothing?" Soothing what? You don’t need to soothe something that doesn’t hurt. Soothing is only necessary when there’s an ache. To me this means he has cared before, and he has been hurt by caring before, and now he's coping with that by dancing through life. He is soothing his pain from secretly caring just too much, by dancing. Not because he doesn't care anymore about anything, but because he can't stop doing it, so he has to keep dancing. Dancing is loud, and visible. If he dances, people don't ask questions about his personality about what he thinks or how he feels. Maybe they haven't been doing it anyway, so he distracts them by doing his little dance, and as soon as they get too close, he pushes them away. But what he believes to be true for now is that caring = painful and dancing = a way to cope with that pain

But Elphaba just saw him care—deeply. She knows he’s capable of it. And she knows how unbearably sad it must be to choose to pretend otherwise. At the same time, she also understands how painful caring can be, she just highlighted is. In that moment, they find common ground.

But Fiyero’s façade—his carefree persona—is what he assumes people value in him most. So the second he realizes Elphaba doesn’t see him that way, he panics. He thinks that if she can see through him, it means she doesn’t want him there. No one has ever appreciated him for anything beyond the image he projects. So if that mask is gone… what’s left? Why would she still want him around, if he's not fun and happy and carefree? So he starts to leave.

And then she proves him wrong.

Not only does she say "she does (want his help)," but she physically holds onto him, keeping him there. The shock on his face (second gif from the bottom) says everything—he never expected someone to want him without the act. And later, when she touches his face so gently, you can see him struggling to process it. This is the most vulnerable he’s ever been, and it terrifies him. Not only that, but Elphaba sees a scar on his face, and sees that he has been hurt, without him noticing it. She reaches out and touches him gently, not really wanting anything, and he just can't bear it.

Her caring for him is not painful, it's soothing.

His Freudian slip a few beats later—"I better get to safety."—isn’t just about physical danger. This doesn’t feel safe. Being seen, being wanted for real, is the opposite of what he’s used to. Caring and being cared for are equally scary, but only the latter seems like a completely new experience for him. However, after feeling it, he finds something so real that he just yearns for it from now on. Yearns to be seen and touched and to be needed for something he did instinctively, without a thought, something he did because it felt right.

That’s why the later scene with Glinda is so important. When she holds his hand, the shot mirrors the moment with Elphaba—but with one key difference. Glinda is pulling him away, back into the world of pretense. But he can’t go back, not after this, and you can see him looking back at where he came from, back to the forest, back to Elphaba, back to being seen. For once, caring was not painful, and someone cared for him as well.

[love-byers]

i fear no byler quote will make me more unhinged than:

"You guys think he's okay?"

"He's always weird when he has to go in."

"I don't know. He's quiet today."

"He's always quiet."

"..."

LIKE HOLY FUCK

the amount of depth this scene adds to mike and will's relationship despite only being a few seconds long is INSANE. my film student oomf @reo-bylerwagon has told me that it's a real strategy to find the exact right wording that adds this depth. there's only so many lines and so many scenes, so every last bit has to count towards something.

there is so much here

1. mike being closest to the camera while the others hang back

2. mike's expression being more concerned than the others

3. "you guys think he's okay?"

dustin is worried about his friend, but he's unsure. he seeks out lucas and mike's opinions.

4. "he's always weird when he has to go in."

lucas has noticed that will is noticeably different on days he has to go to the lab. but he reassures dustin. this is expected. will is always a bit off on days he knows he has to go in, because he hates it.

5. "i don't know. he's quiet today."

mike isn't so sure. will isn't acting the way he always does on the lab days. there's something else. he's noticeably quieter. mike suspects that this isn't just because of the lab, that maybe will isn't okay.

6. "he's always quiet."

lucas knew will was acting weird, but he didnt notice any difference in how quiet he was being. will is always quiet. that's just who he is. that's not a factor in his weird behavior, at least to lucas.

will is always quiet. every day. he is a quiet person.

there are several layers here that make it difficult to notice these shifts in will's behavior. he is a naturally quiet person. there is a known explanation for why he acts weird on certain days. and this is one of those days. no one else thought will was outside of his norm.

but still, somehow, mike knew that wasn't it. he noticed that will was acting different even on the day where he ALWAYS acts different. he noticed that will was being slightly quieter than usual even though he is ALWAYS quiet every single day. he knew this was new behavior. he knew there was something else going on.

but he doesn't voice this, he just watches will silently from behind the fence, clearly deep in thought. he's worried.

i'm sorry but why shove it down our throats that mike is more attentive to will than his other friends and clearly cares for him more and wants to protect him just for it to all mean absolutely nothing in the end? he is even more attentive to will than he is to el.

like how are they going to explain mike's behavior? cause like they still have to do that

"will is just his best friend" there's a whole scene in s1 where mike says they're ALL his best friends

"he's known will the longest" he also says he doesn't treat his friends any differently because of how long he's known them

literally what else is there?? is will just his extra special platonic bro soulmate???

ok so will was misled by mike's attentive caring and supportive behavior that was exclusive to him and developed romantic feelings. and mike is like that...just cause. this whole plot was just a tool to help will realize his sexuality and he'll get over mike and mlvn will be endgame.

a few problems with that...

WILL HAS BEEN BULLIED AND ABUSED AND CALLED GAY/GAY SLURS HIS WHOLE LIFE. unfortunately, and fellow queer people will understand, it's easier to come to terms with what you are when it's been spouted in your face your whole life. if wills love for mike was just to help the audience understand that he's gay, what was the point of all the homophobic abuse and hate crimes and all that? just cause? alright. noah has said will realized his feelings for mike "later on" but quickly cut himself off. will realized his FEELINGS, not his sexuality. will wasn't crying in the van because he doesn't want to be gay, or because he's coming to terms with the fact that he's gay. he was crying because he is deeply in love with someone who he thinks will never love him back. this isn't about self acceptance. will has accepted himself. he's accepted what he is. he's accepted his feelings for mike. that's not the problem. that's not why he's hurting. he's hurting because she's he's heartbroken.

like i'm sorry but it's ridiculous to pretend like you don't see how anything besides byler endgame makes 0 sense. bc it really doesn't and you don't even have to be a writer to see it

[spread-the-influence]

I know its never gonna happen ever not ever, and that you only got the ragatha brainworms, but its been stuck in my brain since the jax murder.

if ragatha hadn’t been virus’ed, yet somehow still got to the point where jax says “to have a friend” (unlikely), would jax have actually opened up, or just shuttered himself as soon as the concept of being open sets back in? Could he have improved had he not been ganked?

forgive me for the essay below . ragatha may be rotting my brain but i still have elaborate thoughts on the other characters , even if i don't go to the levels of insanity i go for ragatha .

jax , to me , is a deeply lonely and miserable person , and i will say here that the line was kind of more ' a person that'll see and understand me ' . my interpretation of jax is not as charitable as most interpretations of him i've seen , though — he's not a jerk with a heart of gold or is secretly protecting everybody . he's just someone with a very destructive coping mechanism that harms everybody and himself .

he doesn't really see the cast as People , he sees them as Characters . a Cast in the big theater stage that is the circus . he prefers to do what's not boring by going off-script . this means making a mess out of the stage set , bothering the characters , and doing what he's Not supposed to do . it's entertaining ! it distracts him from how ... he's stuck in this stage forever . if he goes with the script , that fact would weigh on him . it's better that he does Not think about that . everyone would be surprised by how quickly that would make him lose his mind .

but it isn't fulfilling . it's a Distraction , an Avoidance . it's something that he does to Not confront his issues . my interpretation of jax at least puts up an emotional wall not Just because he doesn't want people to see his vulnerable side ( i like to think that the one thing he hates is being Wronged , and there's a certain level of suspicion that someone in the cast would do it if he lowers his guard ) but because he thinks there's No reason to put it down .

jax , like a lot of people , craves a community . he wants to be Wanted and Loved . but it's hard for him to get both of those things when these people are just ... Not real to him . what he wants most is That realness . he wants to know that in this big stage he's stuck in , there's someone else who is just as lost as him . someone that also isn't playing by the script . someone that's not a Character .

... and ragatha really doesn't fit those , as much as i'd hate to admit it . she is a Character . she plays the role of the optimistic and caring ragdoll . she is Far from fitting the image of a real person in jax's eyes . that conversation would naturally end in jax realizing he's opening up and shutting himself off — most likely Even more than he already does . basically he wouldn't improve ... with ragatha .

if there's someone that might fit the above paragraph , it's either pomni or zooble . i feel like these two would have better chances of making jax slowly open up with that kind of conversation , since they're both the most grounded and Real people in the circus .

i do not think that it would make jax instantly accept into the community of the circus — years of bad habits are Not easy to drop — but it'll be like a hand being extended to him . he sees that there's a world beyond the stage , and he takes it . and that's a lot more fulfilling than distracting himself .

lord i feel like this post is a contender enough to warrant a second ESSAY WARNING tag but yeah , jaxxle thoughts ! he's not in my top three favorites ( those respectively go to caine and zooble ) but i still find him interesting to think about .

[postsforposting]

that's an incredibly negative view. i don't think people should default to steelman; i do think taking a positive view, especially of toneless plain text, should be the default. it makes for a pleasant atmosphere. unfortunately people, especially online, seem to think the meanest view of those around them is.....a good thing? how it should be??? that there's no other way to do things???

we really can just. not. do that. believing other people mean well is....a pretty basic requirement not only for civility but also for simple geniality.

and again, "it sure can be stated in a negative or entitled way, but that is true of literally everything. that isn't the nature of the sentiments expressed here." i didn't rephrase anything.

the difference is your attitude vs mine about other people that neither of us know. everyone knows a "bad attitude" sours everything, not because the rest of the world is suddenly foul, but because that's what you personally see. most people have the self awareness that's a personal problem and they should not change how they treat other people based on....personal mood. you can feel annoyed while understanding "annoyance and selfishness" is your own miasma and not what others meant.

that's. really the entire thesis. if we're going to declare hate is the default, and it's this hard for people to understand, perhaps we need to demonstrate why that's a bad idea.

"where is the content"

if we interpret the meaning in your way, this is someone who is either new to fandom or to a particular website. it is a normal question to ask. most people in the world never even know settings and manuals exist, let alone look at, understand, or change them: the things that control their experience. for clarity given the nature of this conversation, i do not mean "haha what a fucking entitled jackass" in the sense of your use of "ignorant"; i mean "figuring out and understanding things is hard for most people". let alone people who are new to a thing. asking something like this is normal, expected, and necessary. responding in the tune of "what an asshole" is unkind and establishes a gross atmosphere.

i daresay a lot of people are familiar with the lucky 10,000 comic. everyone likes that, but when it comes time to practice it? yeesh.

you misunderstood what i said above; i don't think it would be useful or correct to dismiss that as ""fucking ignorant"". it sure does make a lot of people feel good to do that though. which is the problem.

even going "where is the content????" is often "i am frustrated that i can't find these wonderful things everyone else easily finds, will someone show me". "where the fuck is everything" is the same idea in a much more combative tone; for some strange reason, it seems like that would be seen LESS negatively given the worldviews in this post.

imo, generally people ask "where is the content" to express that they have noticed there is less now than there used to be. hence: i love this so much, why don't other people.

people write in the style of how they talk when having an in person conversation. generally nobody goes around delicately crafting their punctuation to avoid the slew of wrong interpretations that are possible with any statement. let alone the cultural differences that can contribute to that. people assume you're going to understand them, or at least that you'll ask for clarification and not default to jumping down their throat. like, you know. the way people navigate normal conversations.

i don't know why people should have to put that much effort into what they say, while listeners not only don't but aren't expected to put in any thought to how they're interpreting it. the speaker has to accommodate literally every possible way they could be interpreted, including batshit aggressive ones (which means they have to assume their listeners are both.....ignorant....and nasty? unpleasant way to live.), while the listener gets to assume their knee jerk and negative assumptions are perfect and they can't have possibly misunderstood or inserted things that aren't there?

fuckin weird.

"why has all the hype died down"

if most people understand this, either this person is one of the ones that do not, or they don't mean it strictly literally.

if they do not understand it, again, asking why is a normal and expected thing. lucky ten thousand, yeah? responding negatively to that is....not nice. does not create a pleasant atmosphere. i don't think most people are familiar with serious fandom; most people aren't part of it, meaning they watch a thing, like it and move on without engaging further. the "fandom" people are generally familiar with is juggernauts that have lasted decades, things with dedicated yearly events: things that have never died down and the average person always likes. it is normal to think that if you like a thing, you don't suddenly stop. that's wrong, but it's how people think of fandom.

if they do not mean it literally, imo it usually means something to the effect of "why did people stop liking this". a normal thing to ask, especially if they also don't understand the fad nature that most fandoms go through.

"Why is there no more content why did everyone leave"

follows naturally from the previous. "there is nothing" generally means "i can't find anything". it's a request for help. people are uninclined to phrase it as "please help" because.....a lot of people respond to that with "haha what a fucking ignorant asshole". it should not be hard to see why that's destructive.

it could also mean "there is way less", which again, is normal to wonder. "there is way less" is only asked if you....want more. because you enjoy it. that brings us to

"it's about the blatent dismissal of creators' work and being content-hungry"

which you unambiguously mean in a negative way.

"i am sad that there is less" does require that the speaker enjoy the content and would like more. that is....the opposite of "blatent dismissal". the most common fan question is "will there be a sequel" and "what's the release date". you seem to think those are disgustingly hateful things to ask, which is a bit odd given that most fandoms get upset when their canon content is cancelled.

"i like this so much that i want more" is second breakfast and elevensies type behavior. of course people are.....content hungry. i think it's a bit mean to take gollum's view that pippin and merry are nassssty wicked hobbitses for that. it should be obvious that such an attitude drives people away and makes it feel like their appreciation isn't wanted.

....

i gotta say, i'm tickled pink that people who identify as "serious fans" deny that there can be meaning beside what you personally interpret, especially when the common fandom sentiment is "oh that was a clumsy accident, it doesn't mean anything deeper" while.....inserting all this extra meaning for actual, real, people who haven't had years to craft what they mean. we imbue two seconds of thought with hatred, but nothing for years' worth of a deliberate act?

"there is less" is about those who stopped. it is not about those who remain. it's quite obviously not about you. to answer with "it's not dead, i'm still posting" is to insert yourself where you weren't addressed. sir this is a wendy's. even when it IS a personal question, that's not inherently a demand to perform, it is literally just interest in you and your thoughts. "why" is not a hateful question. and even, EVEN a personal question, you still really can just. not answer at all. regardless of the valence you assign to it.

people are always going to have the same questions as other people, because every day someone new shows up, or someone old has a new thought. reality and your reaction to it are separate things. if they were not, we would have to shout down every kid asking endless whys, since obviously the parent's annoyance and frustration must be synonymous with the kid being a hateful greedy dismissive monster telling its mother she's not good enough, a child who needs to be taught that expressing interest is a sin. bad way to go about interacting with other people, if i do say so myself.

if you don't enjoy the culture of having everything you say reprocessed into its secret and true evil meaning that you obviously totally intended, perhaps we should. just not do that. to other people. as a general rule.

hostility is unpleasant to be around. there shouldn't even be "doubt" to benefit from, but even then, assuming other people aren't evil should not be treated as a sin. whereas doubt literally is a canonical sin.

'Where is all the Deadpool and Wolverine content'

'Why has all the hype died down'

'Why is there no more content why did everyone leave'

Meanwhile the people who are making the content are left feeling insulted because lord forbid we're not enough. Dude stfu and make your own stuff or didn't complain.

Do you see me whining about Boondock Saints? No! Because that's an old franchise and there's not near as much stuff as they're used to be, but I love everything that comes from it. And I don't ever complain.

[steddieas-shegoes]

if you fall, i will catch you

for @steddielovemonth day 2 using Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper

rated t | 855 words | no cw | tags: high school, prom, slow dance, flirting, open ending but assumed getting together

🪩🕺💃🪩🕺💃🪩🕺💃🪩💃🕺🪩

Prom is stupid.

Steve didn’t even want to come. He didn’t have a date and nothing is more embarrassing than showing up to prom alone. Even the nerds come as a group, dancing and laughing together.

His mom made an appointment for his suit fitting and he couldn’t really explain to her that there was no need. She still thinks he and Nancy are on track to be married when Nancy graduates high school. He doesn’t know how to tell her that he’ll probably die alone.

Okay, that’s a little dramatic. He’s probably not gonna die alone.

But he may die unhappy, and that’s worse.

Most of the music hasn’t been terrible so far, at least. Only one slow song played and no one seemed interested in dancing to it.

Steve’s a fucking wallflower at his own prom. He never saw this coming.

He figures he could probably escape within the next few songs, no one would even notice his absence. He makes a mental plan to wait until one of the parent chaperones walks back to the other side of the room.

Then he’s off.

He manages to escape to the hall behind the gym, the one that leads to the auditorium and drama class, not the main building of the school. No one should be back here. It’s the perfect escape route.

“Never thought I’d see the day when King Steve is trying to escape prom,” a voice says from the end of the hall. The music from the gym is echoing in here, but the voice is much louder. It’s familiar, too. “Miss Wheeler too busy with Byers to dance?”

It’s Munson. Steve sighs.

“Why are you even here?”

“It’s my senior prom, too! Or should those of us not graduating not be allowed?” Eddie walks closer and Steve sees that he’s actually dressed up. It’s not a designer suit like he’s been forced into, but it’s nice. Eddie looks…nice.

“Wait,” Steve registers what he actually said. “Not graduating?”

“Yep. Apparently quadratic formulas are crucial to my development and I cannot enter society until I understand them.” Eddie kicks his foot across the tile, leaving a scuff mark from shoes that have probably been waxed beyond necessity. “And I guess dissecting a frog and turning in homework may have helped.”

“But aren’t you pretty smart?” Steve thought he was one of those dungeon dweebs like Dustin. Dustin’s the smartest person he knows, without a doubt, kid or not. He thought all the nerds who play that game were like that.

“Sure, I’m smart enough,” Eddie scoffs. “But I don’t play by their rules. I forget to do homework. I argue.”

“But if you know the stuff, they can’t fail you.”

“Ah, but they can. I don’t have the Harrington name to convince them to change a D to a C. It’s all good. Everyone expected it.”

Steve’s brows furrow, forehead creasing as he thinks about how many things people expected of him that won’t happen.

“Just because people expect it doesn’t mean you have to give it to them,” he says.

Eddie’s eyes widen and he seems shocked by Steve’s words. But the shock wears off quickly. Steve wonders if he imagined it.

“Right you are! Very wise words from the king,” Eddie bows dramatically.

Steve laughs.

Eddie glances up, tense until he realizes Steve’s not laughing at him, just at the entertainment. He stands straight and holds out his hand.

“I do believe such wise words should be repaid with a dance,” Eddie puts on a fake British accent, nose pointed to the sky, smirk playing on his lips.

Steve thinks this must be what it’s like to be charmed by someone.

“A dance?” Steve asks. “Here? With me?”

“It would be my honor,” Eddie loses the accent and turns his head back down so he’s looking right at Steve’s eyes. “Miss Lauper wrote this song just for us, after all.”

Steve’s confusion grows until he hears the song coming from the gym. He can only imagine how awkward it must be in the gym while some couples slow dance with chaperones watching their every breath. He reaches out and takes Eddie’s hand.

“The honor is mine, sir Munson,” Steve tries for an accent like Eddie had previously, but it falls flat.

Eddie pulls him close, but hesitates before he puts an arm around his waist. Steve feels breathless all of a sudden, like they’ve rocketed into space and he forgot one of those astronaut suits. He nods, giving permission for Eddie to take the lead.

When Eddie pulls him closer, they’re almost flush against each other.

Steve’s heart is racing.

“I didn’t know you were weird,” Eddie admits quietly. It sounds a lot like admiration. He’s swaying them back and forth gently, and Steve finds it’s easy to lose track of everything but the way Eddie’s hands rest on his body. “It’s nice to see you, Steve.”

It’s a lot more than what it sounds like.

As Cyndi Lauper plays, Steve wonders if this is how his prom was always meant to be spent: in Eddie Munson’s arms, falling.

[poisonf0rest]

genuine question because youre one of my favorite writers, you seem to really have a thorough grasp of the characters: what do you see in rafayel that makes him appealing? i try to get past his entitled brattiness because i really want to enjoy all of the guys, but i cant see anything else. please help me understand 🥲

Oh boy, baby, darling, sweetheart, you opened a can of worms. Come do a little bit of character analysis with me~

About Rafayel:

Rafayel is a brat, yes. But that means he wears his heart on his sleeve, outright when he needs your attention or sulking when something is bothering him or faking a dramatic accident to get your attention. There's no silent guessing or fake "I'm fine's," just his overdramatic, raw emotion that's easy to read. He's has anxious attachment stemming from hundreds of years of betrayal and loss.

Rafayel is a romantic, a yearner. And yes, while I also agree his attitude was annoying at first I am very unfortunately into people who get on my nerves, especially when they are flirty and funny as well. I folded during his hospital scene.

Entitled? He is a god. He has been trying and failing to save his entire civilization for over 800 years and still simply can't because he refuses to hurt the one he loves. While all the boys have been through pain there's something about Rafayel's story that really gets me. I think it’s because if I— as mc— knew the sacrifice he was making, I would give myself up. So to have someone selfish enough to place me first is heartbreaking, devoted, and cruel. 

Also there are plenty of scenes where Rafayel is serious, especially if you read between the lines. The brattiness and sass is a playful cover to someone who's been through pain and understands it. Someone who chooses to still see joy and happiness in his life while fully understanding how cruel the world is.

Simply, I'm a sucker for doomed character archetypes. There is no version of Rafayel's and mc's story where they both end happy. Millions of people will die or if mc kills herself Rafayel will live forever as a husk of his former self. Using a sassy, filirty, bratty attitude to cover up such a genuinely depressing story is so juicy to me.

About Me:

I'm a Zayne irl. Work is honestly the most important thing to me outside my family, I'm devoted to my hobbies and leadership positions, and I have a close circle of friends I would do anything for. I'm also fucking hilarious subjective.

I'm the eldest sibling, the guard dog, the de-facto leader for almost everything. I'm the person who had to grow up fast, to parent my immigrant parents at times, who never made space for love, and who is by default independant and comfortable with it.

I prefer to listen-- I love my yapper friends. Don't get me wrong I can talk for hours about anything, but day to day I tend to get exhausted talking after a while so I surround myself with people who can do the easy talking for me.

My irl partner is a mix between Rafayel and Sylus I'd say. He's the one who pulls me out of my work spirals by nagging me until I give in, someone I'm comfortable yapping about my current hyperfixations too, someone who my inner child can come out to. But I also enjoy being a caregiver, that's always been my role and I relish in it, I like being relied upon as much as I appreciate having someone in my life that lets me take a step back. The only part that's Sylus is how his love language is bullying me and his vibe/looks lmao, but usually I am more into raf-stereotypical pretty boys.

So, overall, the appeal of Rafayel to those that choose him:

Rafayel is for the eldest daughters who needs their inner child to be free, who needs a little bit of ridiculousness and impulsiveness in their lives.

Rafayel is for those who never got praised for their effort or strength, for those who success was the only option, who had to be perfect, reliable and serious all the time. He makes it so clear how much simply being with you means to him, constantly complimenting, flirting, and reassuring you just how much he needs you. Showing you how obsessed with you he is.

Rafayel is for those who didn't think love had a place in their lives due to shit family or life circumstances. He proves time and time again that you're the only one he loves. Even though he's lived forever, you were worth the wait and that he would wait again for you, no matter how long it takes. He proves you can be loved, and that it comes easy.

Rafayel is for those who always placed others first. He's more than willing to show you again and again you will always be first in his mind. He needs you more than he does water. Sure, you can take care of him, but he wants to be with you and take care of you, too.

Rafayel is for those who need someone else to drag them out of work/school/spiralling even when they don't want to admit it, bringing in laughter, color, and a little bit of dramatics.

Rafayel is for creators who dedicate themselves to their craft, who are scared of losing this "spark," who want to get better but constantly feel that what they create isn't enough or must be more. 

Rafayel is for hopeless romantics, those that go out of their way to surprise their friends during their birthdays, those who plan platonic dates for those they care about, those who put out so much love into the world and suddenly break when they get that love back.

Rafayel is for those used to having little siblings or those to take care of in our lives. Only while Rafayel relishes in the attention, he's also ready to give it back five-fold.

Rafayel is a switch for switch (brat for brat) lmao. He's for those who like to start on top, teasing and pushing his buttons to get all those cute reactions out of him, just until he breaks. Then he can take control and finish us up. We love vocal men.

Maybe projecting, but Rafayel is the perfect bi-girl's boyfriend. He's a classic pretty boy, unafraid to be in touch with his feminine side, a little dramatic, a little artsy. But he's also super romantic, sensitive, loving, and intense. And gosh, who could say no to those big puppy eyes?

I could probably continue to talk about Rafayel for hours, but ya, hopefully this helps answer why I and others love this man. Just continue on with the main story and read between the lines with his dialogue and I'm sure you'll pick up on it too~

[d1gitalwitness]

Love and Justice in Elementary — "The One That Got Away"

I rewatch this episode from time to time, and it strikes me over and again just how committed it is to non-legal means of justice, which is particularly rare given that Elementary technically operates within the copaganda genre (with some room for outliers here and there).

When Kitty is about to murder Gruner, the man who sexually assaulted and tortured her, Sherlock shows up. Typically within the police procedural, Sherlock would be the Character Who Reminds [X] That Killing Is Wrong and Legal Justice is Right. But Sherlock doesn't do any of that. He tells Kitty that she deserves to know that he has found a way to prosecute Gruner. He tells her that this is an option if she doesn't want to wrestle with what it means to take a life. While following the law is not what Sherlock thinks Kitty should do, it is an option nonetheless. What would be unfair, Sherlock understands, is for Kitty to have no way out but to resort to murder.

Kitty responds, "What does that have to do with me? With what he did to me?"

And she's right, prosecuting Gruner has nothing to do with what he did to her. What the police wants is not what she wants. Kitty's assault was a singular event, and only she can determine what justice should be. It's an oddly refreshing take, given that most procedurals would remind to Kitty to uphold the law (e.g. SVU).

Sherlock replies, "Nothing. Everything. Wish I could tell you. If you decide that killing Gruner will make you feel whole again, I won't stop you. But whatever you decide, you will always be my friend."

I've thought a lot about this scene, and how it places Kitty's decision and Sherlock's love at the center of what justice should be. It also brings to the forefront Sherlock's struggle with addiction — he doesn't have many friends which means that his gesture of love is completely genuine. It's a gesture of unconditional love from a stoic man who finds it difficult to love, to a woman whose experience of love has been destroyed by sexual abuse. It doesn't matter to Sherlock if Kitty kills Gruner because the fact that she is his friend will always come first. What happens, Kitty realises, is that she is offered something that she has wanted for so long but thought she couldn't have. That someone loves her so much that she feels, for the first time, that she is able to say it back and mean it. So it is beautiful that the episode ultimately ends with Kitty saying: "Do you know what I haven't said to anyone in a really long time? I love you. Isn't that the saddest thing?"

While the heart of Elementary will always be Sherlock and Watson, stories like Kitty also reveal that sobriety requires love at its center, and it requires that Sherlock show up for his friends. He's a self proclaimed misanthrope, but his time with Joan has changed him; instead of embracing being a lone genius, he puts in the work to be worthy of the care and love that he receives in return. It may be corny or whatever, but the series is about true, genuine love, the kind that is so huge that it passes on from one person to another, healing everything in its way.

[rosedustdreams]

if you do angst, could you do walker and you having a miscommunication (him thinking you rejected his confession or are dating someone else) and dont talk for a bit but then make up?

Only You

Walker’s confession had hit you like a lightning bolt on a clear day. You’d been standing together during a break on set, joking about how much Percy Jackson seemed to mirror him in real life. But then he’d suddenly gone quiet, shuffling nervously before blurting it out.

“I like you,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “Like… more than a friend.”

You froze. Completely blindsided, your mind raced to catch up with his words. Walker Scobell, the guy who could make you laugh so hard your stomach hurt, liked you? You opened your mouth to respond, but your brain failed to produce anything coherent.

Before you could figure out what to say, a crew member appeared, calling your name and gesturing that you were needed for the next scene.

“I—uh—” you stammered, glancing between Walker and the person waiting for you. “I gotta—”

“Go,” Walker said quickly, stepping back with a strained smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “Yeah, don’t worry about it.”

You wanted to stay, to explain, but the urgency in the crew member’s voice pulled you away. You didn’t look back as you rushed off, though the weight of Walker’s words clung to you the entire day.

----

The days that followed were agonising. Walker wasn’t just avoiding you—he was practically a ghost. The easy banter you’d shared was gone, replaced with stiff nods and short, polite answers when you tried to talk to him.

You tried to corner him during lunch one day, only for him to grab his food and walk off before you could even sit down. Another time, you found him at craft services, sipping on a bottle of water.

“Walker, can we talk?” you asked, your voice hesitant but hopeful.

“Sorry, can’t,” he mumbled, not even glancing your way. “Busy.”

And just like that, he was gone again, leaving you feeling like the ground had crumbled beneath you.

You didn’t understand. Sure, you hadn’t given him an answer, but it wasn’t because you didn’t like him. You just needed time to process, to figure out how to tell him how much he meant to you.

The breaking point came a few days later when you overheard him talking to Leah in a quiet corner of the set.

“It’s fine,” Walker said, leaning against a chair with his arms crossed. His voice was bitter, a tone you’d never heard from him before. “She’s obviously into someone else. Why else would she just leave after I told her how I felt?”

Leah frowned, clearly trying to console him. “Are you sure? Maybe she was just caught off guard.”

“She didn’t even answer me,” Walker said with a dry laugh. “That’s answer enough, right? And I get it. She’s amazing—way out of my league. I never should’ve said anything.”

Your heart shattered at his words. He thought you didn’t like him back. He thought you’d rejected him.

The next morning, you decided you couldn’t let this go on any longer. You found Walker sitting alone in a quiet corner of the set, scrolling through his phone. He looked up briefly when you walked over but quickly averted his gaze, his expression unreadable.

“Can we talk?” you asked softly, sitting down beside him.

“Not much to say,” he replied, his tone cool. “I get it.”

“Walker.” You reached out and placed your hand on his arm, forcing him to look at you. “You don’t get it. I overheard what you said to Leah.”

His eyes widened in surprise, a flicker of embarrassment crossing his face. “You… you heard that?”

“Yes,” you admitted. “And you’ve got it all wrong.”

He frowned, confused. “What do you mean?”

“I didn’t leave that day because I didn’t like you,” you explained, your voice trembling slightly. “I left because I was shocked. You caught me completely off guard, and then I got pulled away before I could say anything. And after that, I didn’t know how to bring it up again.”

Walker’s brow furrowed as he processed your words. “So… you’re not into someone else?”

You shook your head. “No. I’m not. Walker, I like you too. I’ve liked you for a while now. I just never thought you’d feel the same way.”

For a moment, he just stared at you, as if trying to decide whether or not to believe you. Then his face softened, and the corners of his mouth lifted into the boyish grin you’d missed so much.

“You like me?” he asked, his voice filled with disbelief and cautious hope.

“Yes,” you said, smiling despite the nerves swirling in your chest. “I like you.”

His grin widened, and he let out a soft laugh, running a hand through his hair. “Wow. I… I really thought I’d blown it.”

“You didn’t blow it,” you assured him. “But I swear, if you avoid me like that again, we’re gonna have problems.”

Walker laughed, the sound light and genuine, and it made your chest feel warm. “Deal. No more ghosting, I promise.”

“Good,” you said, nudging him playfully.

“So,” he said, his tone turning shy again. “Does this mean I can officially ask you out?”

“You’d better,” you teased, your smile growing.

“Okay,” he said, leaning closer, his eyes locking onto yours with a mixture of excitement and nervousness. “Would you like to go out with me?”

“Yes, Walker,” you said, your voice soft but steady. “I’d love to.”

And just like that, the tension of the past few days melted away, replaced with something warm and hopeful. It wasn’t perfect it never is but as Walker smiled at you, you knew it was the start of something amazing.

A/N: love this so much my first kinda angst thanks for the request

Tags: @izzystylinson, @sophand4n4, @kaiwrites092, @shellsarepretty, @cheoriemoawa, @prettiesteyess,  @vintagewntr10, @hecallmebigpurrr420, @killualovbot, @iloveneilperry

[julietvstheworld]

( yandere nsfw hcs ) bloody painter

nsfw - afab reader x bloody painter headcanons

╰┈➤ slight voyeurism, possessive relationship, overstimulation, obsession, eating you out (romantically <333), mirror sex

reuploadbc the last one was broken :/

Helen believes love is always ideal and fanciful, straight out of a fairytale. All of the cliches you see in Disney movies are a reality to him: Love at first sight, soulmates, first kiss, first time, and all the way till death do us part. He keeps his romanticized ideas of love everywhere he goes, especially in bed.

He tries his best to be soft when making love, he really does. He always starts off slow; giving you loving kisses on your palm, moving to your lips, your neck, your chest, your thighs, and finally your throbbing heat. He makes as much eye contact as he can when eating you out, absolutely relishing in your half-lidded look of lust. Using his tongue to explore your pussy walls and thumb to make small circles on your clit. Even while his mouth is working wonders on you, he’ll constantly ask if you’re feeling good. “Is this good?” “Do you want me to go harder?” “Tell me how you’re feeling?”. He knows that you can barely respond to him through your moans, but it never hurts to ask. He always prefers giving over receiving, his desire thrives on his partner's pleasure. He tries having this wholesome sex at least once a week, he normally doesn't have a high libido if nothing happens, but hey, sex is healthy! It always starts out with you guys just cuddling, watching a movie, after he's done with a mission, etc, etc. That’s all nice and good, but as I said before, Helen is heavily invested in soulmates. You are his only and he is yours only. This gives him major jealousy issues. Whenever he sees another guy giving you any form of slight romantic attraction, he sees that as someone trying to take his soulmate. He’ll want to go home immediately, if you can’t, he will pull you to the nearest closet or bathroom.

If you guys make it to his room? He has the freedom to do whatever he wants to you. He absolutely adores tying you up to the bed. Blindfolds, gags, and vibrators are coming out. Before he even thinks about taking out his cock, he wants you to know that before you see the person who flirted with you ever again, he wants to cover your entire body with love bites. He’ll always press the vibrator to your clit as he leaves small marks all over your body. You can feel him smirk against your skin once you get louder as he presses against your sweet spot. He will not take the toy away from your heat until your mascara is streaming down your cheeks and your body is shaking from orgasming over and over. Then will he take off your binds and move you in front of a mirror to raw-dog you with a leash tightly fastened around your pretty throat. He loves seeing you pant and drool as he’s fucking your brains out. He needs you to know that you’re his.

If you guys can’t make it home? He’ll still rail you to his heart's content in the bathroom. He isn’t the biggest fan of quickies but understands that it’s kinda rude to take up the only bathroom at a party. That being said, he still won’t have any mercy on your poor pussy. He’s the type of guy to bend you over the sink and fuck you like a horny virgin. Since you guys can’t use his specially made ropes, you use the second-best thing, his belt. While he’s pounding you, he’ll slap your ass until it’s raw and red. He’ll make you say thank you after every single spanking. Even though he knows the door isn’t soundproof, he prefers you to be as loud as you can. It turns him on when he knows that other guys can hear you moaning his name, especially other guys that caused his jealousy in the first place. You’re his princess, after all, he’s okay with that being known to the world by any means possible.

Aftercare with Helen is the absolute best. He practically worships the ground you walk on so he’s at your every beck and call. Want him to massage your ankles and wrists after being bound? He’s already done it. Wanna just stay and bed and cuddle while he whispers sweet nothings to you? Easy peasy, he already does it every night. Do you want to take a hot bubble bath together? The water’s already running and he’s lighting floral scented candles to set the mood.

Despite being a yandere absolutely enamored and obsessed with your every breath, he doesn’t murder most of the people who try to woo you. He thinks it’s annoying that they think that they’re good enough to even be in the same room as you, but they back off once they hear his name being screamed by you behind closed doors. The only time when he has a major issue with your admirers is when they get too touchy. His normally calm and sophisticated public demeanor becomes quickly enraged and unstable once he sees you becoming highly uncomfortable due to the persistent advances from a creep. Seeing Helen come home drenched in crimson blood with a rare mischievous smirk is a sign that he got rid of your nuisance. No matter how late in the night it is, once you see that grin on his face, you know he’s going to make your pussy sore for the next couple of days in one night.

Helen is totally into praising you. He is obsessed with everything about you and believes you truly are the perfect person in his eyes and wants to remind you at every chance he gets. Every second in bed he’ll shower you with compliments like, “God, you’re so fucking pretty with my cock stuffed in you.”, “Your pussy tastes so good.”, and “Louder, I love hearing you moan.”. His favorite thing to call you is ‘angel’ and ‘darling’

He finds it so hot when you’re wearing makeup. Not because he thinks you’re ugly, but he finds it so sexy when he sees your mascara running down your face and your lipstick is smudged all over your mouth. It’s a huge turn-on for him and he secretly has a picture of it as his wallpaper.

Helen doesn’t jack off that much, maybe once a week. He mostly doesn’t see the point in it because there’s nothing stopping him from just calling you whenever he’s horny.

When you guys had sex for the first time, both of you guys were virgins. Despite this, it wasn’t awkward because he just somehow knew everything that pushed your buttons. In reality, Helen paid BEN 10 bucks to hack into your search history to see what type of porn you were into.

[mylovesstuffs]

Ot13 and what scares them about love

Request: Hey can u do a headcanon ot13: what scares them about being in love.. or love in general? (Like not being enough, losing control, potential heartbreak… smth like that) thanks a lot:)))

A/N: I added the little bullet notes under each member’s part just in case any of you have similar fears—so that you can be reassured that there’s nothing to be afraid of. Personally, I struggle with the fear of being hard to love. It’s something deeply ingrained in me, though I won’t elaborate further. I just wanted you all to feel a little better. At the end of the day, these notes aren’t really for the members (as if they'll see this lol)—they’re for you. This headcanon (sorta) felt surprisingly personal, and writing it made me reflect on so many things about life and love in general. To the anon who requested this, thank you. Your idea was truly unique, and it gave me a space to pause, think, and see things from a different perspective of svt and others.

This is my personal opinion and perspective. It may not accurately reflect their real-life personalities or behaviors.

Seungcheol – The Fear of Failing as a Partner

How I see him is that, he carries a deep sense of responsibility, and that extends to love too. His biggest fear is not being able to protect or take care of his partner the way he wants to. He worries about not being emotionally available or strong enough when they need him most. The idea of letting someone down, especially someone he loves, weighs heavily on him.

Seungcheol, you’re doing your absolute best, and that’s more than enough. Your love is a safe space, and no one could ever doubt the strength you bring to those around you.

Jeonghan – The Fear of Losing Himself

Love is beautiful, but it’s also consuming. Jeonghan fears that being in love might make him lose parts of himself—his independence, his ability to make rational choices, or even his sense of control. He’s afraid of how much power someone else could have over his emotions, especially since he’s always the one in control of his own heart.

Love doesn’t mean losing yourself. The right person will embrace all of you, allowing you to be both independent and deeply connected. You don’t have to choose between the two.

Joshua – The Fear of Unreciprocated Effort

I feel like he’s the type to love deeply, wholeheartedly, and unconditionally. But what scares him is the possibility of loving someone more than they love him. He fears investing everything into a relationship, only to find out that his feelings are not returned in the same way. He doesn’t want to be left wondering if he was ever truly enough.

Shua, you are more than enough. Any love you give will be returned in full measure. You’re so kind and caring, and someone who sees you for who you are will love you deeply in return.

Jun – The Fear of Being Misunderstood

Jun is a deep thinker, and his emotions often run slowly beneath the surface. He worries that no matter how much he loves someone, they might never truly understand him. He’s scared of feeling alone in a relationship, of opening up completely and still not being seen for who he truly is.

The right person will understand you in ways you never imagined. Your depth is so precious, and there are people who will cherish every part of who you are.

Hoshi – The Fear of Love Fading

Love, to him, should always be full of passion and excitement. But he fears that over time, feelings might dull, routines might set in, and the relationship could become something ordinary. He wants love to always feel exhilarating, and the thought of it losing its spark terrifies him.

The most beautiful love grows even stronger with time, and the quiet moments are just as powerful as the loud ones.

Wonwoo – The Fear of Not Being Enough

Wonwoo is reserved, and deeply introspective. He worries that he won’t be able to express love in the way his partner needs. He’s afraid that his way of loving through actions rather than words, might not be enough. The idea of someone wanting more than he can give haunts him.

Wonwoo, your love is already enough. The way you care, through your actions and your presence, speaks volumes. Anyone who truly understands you will appreciate the depth of your heart.

Woozi – The Fear of Losing His Dreams for Love

As we all know, he’s very dedicated to his craft and his passion for music runs deep. While he’s capable of deep love, he fears that being in love might take away the time and energy he’s poured into his dreams. He doesn’t want to choose between love and ambition, but he’s afraid that, in the end, one might have to come before the other.

The right person will support and inspire you to keep chasing your passions while loving you in the most meaningful way.

Dokyeom – The Fear of Hurting or Disappointing Someone

Seokmin has such a big heart, and his worst fear is accidentally hurting someone he loves. He always wants to be a source of happiness, but relationships aren’t always perfect, and the thought of being the reason for someone’s pain is unbearable to him.

Kyeom, your heart is pure, and your love only brings joy to those around you. Anyone who is with you will feel lucky to have such a loving and kind soul in their life.

Mingyu – The Fear of Being Too Much

He loves intensely, and sometimes, that can feel overwhelming. Mingyu worries that his enthusiasm, his affection, and his deep emotions might be too much for someone to handle. He’s scared of loving someone with all his heart, only to be told that it’s suffocating.

Gyu :(( your love is perfect just the way it is. No one will ever think you’re too much. You are a warm, bright presence, and the right person will embrace all of that with open arms.

Minghao – The Fear of Losing Freedom

Love is beautiful (2), but Minghao values his independence. He worries about feeling trapped or restricted in a relationship, about losing the ability to chase his own passions freely. He wants to love without feeling like he has to compromise parts of himself.

The right person will love and respect your freedom while still sharing in your journey together.

Seungkwan – The Fear of Heartbreak

He loves hard, and he knows that means he has the most to lose. The thought of giving his whole heart to someone only to have it broken is terrifying. He’s scared of the kind of pain that lingers, the kind that changes a person forever.

Kwannie, your heart is strong enough to handle anything. Love will come with its ups and downs, but your ability to heal and grow will make you even stronger, and you will find a love that never breaks you.

Vernon – The Fear of Not Being Able to Express Himself

Vernon thinks deeply but doesn’t always voice everything he feels. He fears that his inability to always put his emotions into words might make his partner feel unappreciated or uncertain about his love. He doesn’t want to lose someone just because he couldn’t say the right things at the right time.

Anyone who truly cares for you will understand the depth of your feelings, even in silence. You don’t need to explain everything—you show it.

Dino – The Fear of Not Being Taken Seriously

As the youngest in svt, he’s used to being seen as playful and energetic and his partner will also know this persona just like we do. But in love, he wants to be seen as a dependable partner. He fears that no matter how much he matures, there will always be a part of him that people don’t take seriously. He doesn’t want to be seen as a ‘kid’ in love—he wants to be seen as someone who can love deeply and be a strong, steady presence in his partner’s life.

Dino, your maturity is not measured by age but by the love you give. Anyone who loves you will see the depth of your heart and appreciate the amazing, steady partner you are.

[genderqueerdykes]

I'm going to start throwing a tantrum if the popular leftist YouTubers keep saying Trans Women when talking about the effects of Trump's policies that very much can and do harm and kill trans men. Like I don't get it? What is the point of specifying trans Women every time they talk about broader trans issues? Do they even realize they're doing this?

this is a really good ask, thanks for taking the time to say it! that makes me really glad i don't watch anything even remotely political or related to queer topics on youtube. i'm not sure how other people can do it, it's entirely too stressful and it's way more common than not that people just end up getting sucked up into petty drama instead of talking about the queer experience or helping other queer people.

i have to be honest to god about this behavior: it's virtue signalling mixed with genuine trans(andro)phobia. the vast majority of it is straight up just virtue signalling and it's old as fuck. it is super obvious and i have no idea how people think they're doing anything good by behaving this way. this is a way for people to make Themselves feel better because they're patting themselves on the back for being sooooooooo progressive and sooooooo good to trans women. people want to look like a great ally to transfems without actually being one.

it's fucking annoying as hell and it's being done on purpose to show that that person doesn't give a singular shit about trans men or anyone else and is literally just sucking up to trans women in the hopes of gaining brownie points and looking more progressive. like it's glaringly apparent that people think that trans woman is the only way to be trans, can we call this bullshit for what it is? "trans person" does NOT mean "trans woman". if you want to specifically talk about trans women, just say that. don't do this weird thing where you're like "oh this is gonna affect trans people!" and then immediately say it as trans women.

trans women are not the only trans people. fucking stop this behavior. you are doing this on purpose. you are leaving out trans men on purpose for the sake of trying to look progressive and like you care about trans rights. all you're doing is proving that you are transphobic af and are only doing this to either suck up to trans women, or for trans women to intentionally erase trans men and completely leave them out of the conversation. like sometimes it IS trans women doing this and we HAVE to call it out. trans women can and do participate in transmasc erasure. we have to pretending that trans women can't hurt trans men, transmascs, nonbinary people, genderqueer people and all other kinds of trans people.

i 100% agree with you. if we're talking about trans issues in general why do people ONLY say trans women and that's it? i don't know how to say it any other way than transphobic legislature hurts every single trans person. every single one. masc, femme, both, something else altogether. all of us are affected. what about genderfluid people? what about bigender people? what about transfems who aren't women? what about agender people? what about transneutral people?

trans does not mean "Trans women and trans women only". stop this behavior. we GET it. you wanna LOOK like you care about trans women. we GET that you want to suck up to us for Progressive Brownie Points. like people really think we can't see this shit. people really think that we cannot tell that people are pandering to us just so they can pat themselves on the back for looking like they care about trans rights. we can fucking see that you're doing this to try to get the transfems in your life to think highly of you while you're not actually helping them at all.

i need people to understand that transfems and trans women are aware of how fucking phony this shit sounds, even when it's coming from other transfems and trans women. like we are nowhere near as dumb as y'all think we are. i honestly find it really fucking nasty that people think that trans women are too dumb to tell when people are just sucking up to us to try to make themselves look better. if you ask me, this behavior is just as transmisogynistic as it is transandrophobic, exorsexist and just transphobic in general.

you can't leave out every other single trans person for the sake of trying to gain rights for trans women. it's all of us, or none of us. leaving other trans people out of the discussion will not make trans womens' lives better or easier. we don't want this. stop it.

[weirdero]

I’ve seen a lot of people speculating that Gemma’s storyline will lead to a cloning reveal, which like, it’s a decent theory and wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. But god, this show is so specific and detail oriented Ben Stiller himself has even said nothing in the show is a coincidence. The cloning theory has also been shut down a couple times by some producers and writes from what I understand and idk I feel like a cloning reveal would just be so boring. And honestly, I don’t know if this is insane, but I’m fully leaning towards the idea that when it comes to Ms. Casey/Gemma, it’s more of a resurrection situation.

Okay so hear me out I believe our Ms. Casey is still physically Gemma her original body, her bones, her blood she’s alive baby that’s her but like also it’s not her. It’s like in horror or fantasy stories when a character dies and comes back but comes back wrong YK?. Physically it’s still them but it’s not them. In my opinion, her brain has been completely reset, wiping away whatever kind of person she used to be.

To back this theory I’ve been heavily leaning on the interaction between Ms. Cobel and Helena in the parking lot and just the general existence of the Mammalian Nurturable department.

Now, I might be reading into this too much, but I just love these characters so much and this show so please bear with me, this is a long one.

this season Harmony/Ms. Cobel is a problem. Like there is just no way she isn’t. Lumon is already struggling to keep it together after the scandal the main four caused, and a change in management isn’t helping. People are (probably) starting to pay attention, and they do not need that kind of heat. Ms. Cobel literally crashing tf out making herself homeless and sneaking around in the dark probably isn’t helping.

Helena’s choice of words have always stood out to me. She’s calculated, smart, and precise in how she speak just like Harmony. Both of them are masters at saying exactly what they need to without ever outright saying it yk? So when she she spots Cobel in the parking lot in the middle of the night she clocks her immediately.

Harmony walks out as if she still has a job in that bitch and has the audacity to tell Helena what her needs are and exactly how they should be met. And in my opinion, Helena is appalled but not surprised. She calls her out on her behavior.

“I hear ego, hubris, and arrogance. Kier teaches us they only cause pain.”

To me, this isn’t just a read it’s a warning. Harmony doesn’t take it. She bites back, calling Helena a NEPOTISM BABY. wild.

And I mean look at Helena’s face.

So Helena lays it out for her as plainly as possible

“We didn’t have to ask you back.”

No translation even needed, she just said it flat out Baby, we don’t need you here. You do not, no matter what you think, represent us. You are not Lumon.

And Harmony, being just as cunty clocks her shit right back

“You didn’t have a choice.”

At this point, Ms. Cobel isn’t just skating on thin ice she’s walking across a frozen lake in metal combat boots, her ass skipping around as if the ice won’t break. And that’s her mistake.

Helena, after giving Harmony multiple chances to walk away. Multiple chances to come back in on lumons terms. Multiple chances to stop playing in her fucking face, finally pulls back with a kind smile and offers her a chance to “restart”.

As they walk towards the car, Ms. Cobel locks eyes with Helena’s bodyguard and the instant terror is actually insane. Full deer in headlights.

A lot of people saw that shot and took it as a straight-up Sopranos esque death threat like, if she gets in that car, she’s not gonna survive the drive (RIP Audriana). And sure, it could be as simple as that, but this show is just way too good for it to be that simple.

I think Cobel recognizes the bodyguard. She knows him and I mean like fr knows him.

I saw a theory on Reddit suggesting that the bodyguard might be someone she knew maybe a former coworker, someone from her personal life (they suggested it could’ve been someone she was super close with before she even became the woman we know today) idk just somebody she knows knows and out of nowhere suddenly, he’s here, presented as Helena’s bodyguard. But it’s not him. It’s his skin, his bones, his blood but it’s not HIM.

And the way it plays out, it doesn’t seem like the bodyguard recognizes her at least not in the same way she knows him. That stare man that stare. I didn’t even know Harmony could experience fear. Who knows, maybe in that moment she’s reflecting on everything that’s happened. She bitched out the boss’s daughter in this empty ass parking lot on the brink of a mental break down, and suddenly there’s a chance to start over. All she has to do is get in that car, with that man, talk to the higher-ups, and hit the “reset” button.

Basically my theory is that Lumon are essentially grave robbing the fuck out of that town. Taking people who have been in serious accidents car crashes, house fires, construction site falls, factory explosion, hell even a drive by. I also think they’re also taking drug addicts, the homeless people who have no loved ones looking out for them, or even looking for them at all, the ones who are confirmed to be gone in every way, physically or emotionally. They’re taking these people and giving them a full system reset rebooting the computer.

By doing this, Lumon gets to create a free labor force that works 24/7 without question or resistance, exploiting people who have no emotional ties or support systems. Blank slate baby! They’re also using these individuals as test subjects for whatever weird shit they wanna launch out as a new product.

This helps explain a lot of the weird shit going on with the employees at Mammalian Nurturable. They look so rough and are also really off-putting towards outsiders. Which is understandable but I genuinely believe they haven’t even “clocked out” in days, if not ever.

Even though this theory makes the most sense to me, It still has its plot holes like if Gemma isn’t a clone and it’s her “resurrected” where does she go when she’s not her innie. In Season 1, she tells Mark she’s only conscious as her innie for a couple of minutes at a time, and the longest she’s ever stayed “alive” was the 8 hours she spent with his department. So where tf is she if not there as Ms Casey i don’t know man I do not know.

Anyways I have some other general curiosities about the town itself and why Lumon decided to build their main building there. I saw a TikTok video of someone saying it reminded them of company-built towns like Hershey Pennsylvania or Kodak Town, and I agree. Anywho I love this show so much it hurts I hope it never dies I literally missed having an obsession this intense I hope it gets all the love and awards it deserves!!

[bwat5-blog]

A Sister's Love: Jinx & Vi

**Spoilers For Arcane**

A while back I had a short but pleasant discussion with someone on one of their posts about Jinx's treatment of Vi, and how it can feel like Jinx doesn't seem to care about Vi in many instances. In hopes of further discussion, I posted in the community where many of you wonderful folks shared your thoughts on the subject and I got a lot of really good insight into this as well. I was thinking about that this morning and it got me thinking about Jinx in general, and more specifically the times when even if it's not as clear, her love for Vi shines through.

I've said this many times but it bears repeating. I am aware that I have been quite harsh on Jinx. The unfortunate reason for most of that is that a significant amount of Jinx fans have an obsession with comparing her to Caitlyn or Vi that borders on the fanatical. But my issue has never been, and will never be with the character herself. I think she is absolutely amazing as a character and loved watching her story unfold.

*I do this every-time but I think it's important. Especially because some of you have shared with me that your own mental health is what has made you connect with Jinx so strongly. I understand and recognize that her mental health plays an immensely important role in her character's journey. I am in no way, shape or form a qualified mental healthcare professional. So any disrespect or lack of sensitivity is not my intention*

Jinx & Vi:

The journey of these sisters is heartbreaking and inspiring in equal measure. It is many people's favorite part of the story and for good reason. They are so close when the show begins and ripped apart by the darkness in their world. Only to fight their way back to one another through love and sacrifice.

But their story is not without conflict. In fact at their lowest point they almost kill one another. There is much that can be said about Vi's love for Jinx, the times she fails her, and those important moments, but I want to focus on Jinx right now.

I don’t have exact quotes on hand, but someone in the community made an excellent point during our discussion. Even when Vi and Jinx are at odds, and Jinx’s hallucinations try to convince her that Vi no longer loves her—that she’s been replaced by Caitlyn—Jinx fights back. She defends who she knows her sister to be, even if she can’t always silence those voices. It’s only pain, fear, or manipulation that pushes her too far, making her lose her grip on what she knows to be true.

During the horrifying sequence when Jinx is being saved by Singed, she hallucinates. And who does she hallucinate in that terrifying moment when she is in terrible pain and in such need of comfort? Vi. Even though she just tried to kill Vi on that bridge. The vision is only corrupted when Caitlyn appears, which all stems from Silco and Sevika feeding Jinx's paranoia.

Okay. I know what some of you are thinking seeing me post ANYTHING about the dinner party on a Jinx positive post. Hear me out. There is no question that Jinx does ALL sorts of fucked up shit here. But we are talking about her love for Vi. What does she want here? She wants things to be like they used to be. She wants her sister. She is in such a dark and twisted state that she cannot see how terrible her actions are, but at her core, she wants her older sister to love her like she used to. She doesn't hurt Vi (I mean aside from the bonk). Additionally, and again- I AM NOT SAYING SHE DIDN"T DO TERRIBLE THINGS HERE- Even with all she did to Caitlyn, she knows Vi cares for Caitlyn, she views Caitlyn as the one who was taking Vi from her, and yet she doesn't kill Caitlyn and she easily could have. This is not about justifying anything she does. It's about looking for what lies beneath the darkness in her to see the person she has the potential to be again.

Here at their lowest moment, when Vi and Jinx have almost killed each-other, and Jinx is glad Vi is the one who is going to finish her, Jinx screams "NO!" when Isha does this. She doesn't want Vi to die.

Vi is at her worst during her pitfighter arc. I'm not going super in-depth on this because this post is about Jinx but Vi is in a self-destructive spiral and totally alone. It's quite clear in one moment that Jinx is there in the crowd but if you slow down the whole sequence you actually see her there a few times. This was primarily what I was discussing with some other people and I believe Jinx was watching over Vi in the best way she could process. I'm sure there was some degree of pleasure in seeing Vi cast out by Caitlyn at first, but with all other signs pointing to Jinx caring for Vi I don't think Jinx was here laughing at her sisters pain. More trying to be there and watch over Vi but with no idea how to approach her with all that happened.

*I fully recognize there is a degree of speculation on my part for this point but I think it's reasonable, feel free to let me know if you disagree!*

With everything that has happened between them, the fact that Jinx comes to collect Vi when she finds out about Vander speaks volumes. There is still much to be worked out between them but she wants their family to together again including Vi. And although I couldn't find the GIF for it, when jinx is in the dark with her lighter after Vi and Vander fight is such a heart wrenching moment. She is clearly so afraid that she has caused the death of her sister, her dad, or both. She cares so much for those that she has left.

Jinx and Caitlyn's history is the furthest thing from simple. But in this moment, Caitlyn cast Vi out, hit her, became the commander and placed Zaun under martial law all because she wanted Jinx (this is not a who is right and who is wrong I'm just making a point), Jinx would HATE Caitlyn. But she knows what she means to Vi. And she just saw Caitlyn save Vander. Jinx easily could have let Rictus finish Caitlyn then jumped in if it was just about saving Vander but she still jumps headfirst into the fight.

In the aftermath of Isha and Vander's death, Jinx could easily have escaped Caitlyn. But Caitlyn tells Vi that all Jinx wanted was to make sure Vi was safe after Vi sacrificed herself to protect her.

Jinx's mindset in this moment is a complicated topic. But I want to focus her feelings about Vi. Vi has come and broken her out of jail, risked everything for her again. And Jinx realizes Vi will never give up on her. Even at great cost to herself. So Jinx punches her and leaves her, and almost begs her to start living for herself. Because she knows Vi cannot give herself that permission. She wants Vi to choose her own life, and to choose love.

Free and clear, obviously Jinx was going to do something horrible but thankfully Ekko talked her down. Even still, she could have done anything. But what does she choose to do? She chooses to ride to war with her people, honoring Vi's faith in her.

And of course, the absolutely devastating final sacrifice (I know she's alive but you get it) of Jinx saving Vi's life when the pain and grief finally overwhelm the fearsome brawler. I have mentioned it many times, but Jinx's core belief is that everyone who gets close to her dies. She thinks she is a curse on all who love her. But in her last action, she saves the life of the older sister she knows will always love her, and who never gave up on her.

I have touched on most of this before but it was just on my mind this morning. I hope I didn't bore anyone. I know there are LOTS of strong feelings about Jinx and like I have said over and over nothing here is about justifying the wrong she did. It's just about looking at those moments that showed her true colors even when she herself couldn't see them. Hope you enjoyed, take care!

[minniesfiles]

JUST TO BE LOVED

Soonyoung didn’t know what hurt more, you falling apart or how you couldn’t see what was right in front of you.

❧ PAIRING; soonyoung x reader

❧ GENRE; angst

❧ TAGS/WARNINGS; best friends, unrequited love, angst

❧ WORDCOUNT; 0.8k

𐚁₊⊹

▍12 JANUARY 2025

You wiped your tears with the back of your hand, but they kept falling faster than you could catch them. Your chest was aching, your breathing was uneven, and every part of your body felt heavy with the unbearable loneliness pressing against your ribs.

You sat on the floor of your bedroom with your knees to your chest, sobbing softly. Across from you, Soonyoung watched helplessly with his hands clenched into fists at his sides.

He hated seeing you like this.

You were always the strong one, the one who laughed the loudest, who ran barefoot through the rain and danced without music. But tonight, that spark was gone. The light in your eyes was no longer there, and he could feel the heartbreak radiating off you like a storm about to break.

As he sat down beside you, he was hesitant but unable to keep his distance.

“Y/n,” he said softly, “talk to me.”

You shook your head and curled into yourself even more. Soonyoung exhaled sharply as he tried to push down the anger simmering in his chest. Not at you — but at the person who had done this to you.

After what felt like forever, you finally spoke.

“I just don’t understand,” you whispered. “What’s wrong with me?”

Soonyoung’s heart clenched. “What do you mean?” he asked.

You let out a shaky breath and rubbed your red, puffy eyes. “I try so hard to be good enough. To be pretty enough, interesting enough, lovable enough. But it’s never enough.”

You turned your head towards him as your face crumbled. “All I really want is to be loved.”

Soonyoung inhaled sharply once again.

You had no idea.

You had no idea how much he loved you.

How every time you smiled, he felt the world tilt on its axis.

How every time you cried, he felt like the ground beneath him was crumbling.

How, for years, he had watched you chase after people who never deserved you — who took your love and gave nothing in return.

His fingers twitched at his sides, and they ached to reach for you, to cup your face in his hands and make you see what was always right in front of you.

But instead, he swallowed his feelings like he always did and forced his voice to stay steady.

“Y/n,” he murmured. “There is nothing wrong with you. Not one single thing.”

You scoffed, wiping your nose on your sleeve. “Then why doesn’t anyone stay?”

Soonyoung clenched his jaw. “Because they’re fucking idiots.”

You let out a hollow laugh as you shook your head. “It’s not just them, Soonie. Maybe I’m the problem. Maybe I’m just too much or—”

“Stop.”

His voice was firm, leaving no room for argument. Startled( you blinked at the intensity in his tone.

“You are not the problem,” he said as his eyes burned into yours. “You love too deeply Y/n. You give your heart away so freely to people who don’t know how to hold it. That’s not a flaw. That’s—” he exhaled while running a hand through his hair.

“That’s one of the most beautiful things about you.”

You just stared at him with your lips parted slightly. You searched his face like you were seeing him for the first time, and for a split second, he thought — maybe, just maybe — you were starting to understand.

“Soonie,” you whispered, and Soonyoung held his breath.

‘Say it, Y/n. Please. Say you see it. Say you know. Say you love me too.’

But before you could speak, your phone buzzed loudly against the floor, breaking whatever moment that was building between you both.

You glanced at the screen, and Soonyoung couldn’t quite read your expression. But he didn’t have to look to know who it was.

It was the same guy who shattered your heart only hours ago. The same guy who walked away and left you in pieces — pieces that Soonyoung was always the one to pick up.

You bit your lip in hesitation, while Soonyoung swallowed hard.

He could beg you not to answer.

He could tell you that if you let this guy back in, it would only hurt you all over again. He could finally, finally confess what had been sitting heavy in his chest for years.

But he didn’t.

Instead, he forced a small smile, “you should answer that” he said.

You studied him for a moment. But then, you nodded and picked up the phone, pressing it to your ear as you got up from the floor and walked out of the room.

Soonyoung stayed where he was and stared at the empty space you left behind.

And for the first time in years, he wondered if you would ever see him the way he saw you.

Or if he was destined to love you from the sidelines forever.