#only 2ch so far but it’s good! go read it!

[fistfuloflightning]

Maeglin from the excellent fic 维林诺谋生录 (Valinor’s Way of Living) by MindYourOwnBusiness

[sunnyrosewritesstuff]

Ready to rec some awesome fics that I read this month!! Feel free to add on with some of your own Bagginshield recs. 😁

March 2024 Rec List

G Rated:

A Home, A Pack, A Place of Love by Lucigoo89 (WIP, 4K, 2ch.)- You can't keep me away from puppy fics! Deciding to run away from home, Corgi Bilbo takes puppy Frodo and escapes into the streets which might not be that friendly to the small animals. The love between Frodo and Bilbo is already so adorable and we haven't even met any company members yet!

To Court a King by Porphyrios (Complete, 19K, 1ch.)- This fic has been recced a lot recently and it's totally worth it! Bilbo and Thorin have decided to court, only some are worried about the worthiness of such a match. I have reread this fic twice just this month alone.

T Rated:

Desperate Magic by BeautifulFiction (Complete, 5K, 1ch.)- This is one of those fics that is worth revisting again and again. On the brink of death, Bilbo sees it in himself to tend to Thorin's hair. It's such a unique kind of Everybody Lives fic, and I just get overwhelmed by the love in this story.

Frozen Heart by snowmissus (soul_of_blaze) (WIP, 7K, 3ch.)- When Danny first promoted this fic on tumblr I was 100% invested. Erebor is trapped in a forever winter and Bilbo is brought to see if he can help. I can't wait to see what all is in store for this fic because the setup is spectacular.

Golden Hearts Bleed Faster by LordOfTheRazzles (WIP, 3K, 1ch.)- I've been waiting for Razzy to release this fic. Bilbo Baggins is the Prince of the Shire and in need of a new bodyguard, Thorin. Bilbo is just so sassy and you can tell this is going to lead to some good antics between the duo.

There and Not Back Again (or, The Saving of Erebor) by femmbingley (WIP, 164K, 49ch.)- There's so much to say about this fic. Post-BOTFA dwarven politics where Bilbo has assumed the duties of the consort which makes things more difficult for Dain. I really love the characterizations and I just can't get enough of this fic!

M Rated:

A heart of stone and Fire in his soul by Lucigoo89 (Complete, 3K, 1ch.)- This fic is chock full of beautiful metaphors. Bilbo's introspection on his thoughts of Thorin during their first standoff with Azog. Honestly, this is one of my favorite Goo fics.

E Rated:

Kurdu 'abadaz by LordOfTheRazzles (WIP, 34K, 6ch.)- This is unlike any Post-BOTFA fic I've ever read. The magic of the Arkenstone brings Thorin back to life for a purpose: help the trapped souls of Erebor. There's such a touching scene between Thorin and his amad that has me in pieces over this fic!

Sleep Alone; Start All Over by vicious_summer (WIP, 56K, 3ch.)- I'm still thoroughly enjoying this fic so far. After an accident, Bilbo is the one who ends up losing about seven years worth of memories including the fact that he’s married to the King Under the Mountain. I’m just always so impressed with vicious_summer’s writing style as it has a more Book!Bilbo vibe.

[vgperson]

What Did I Do In 2019?

[kmomof4]

Fic Rec List 3 of 3 tonight

Since my original post was too long, I had to break it up into 3 posts tonight. Hopefully this works. The whole thing is the definitive list of all my favorite fics. On a scale of 1-10, all of these are rated 11 or higher. A single asterisk next to a fic is a desert island fic that I couldn’t do without. A double asterisk is a #1 all time favorite fic that I reread regularly. All links, Tumblr handle (if I know it), ao3 and/or ff profile, links to fics on ao3 and/or ff, are included.  So settle in for some fabulous reading from this EXTREMELY long list. 

From @whisperofgrace on Tumblr, ao3 and ff I Feel So is a post-Neverland one shot in which Emma is forced to confront her feelings for Killian after seeing him with Ruby. Rated E ao3 and ff.

What Could Have Been is a canon divergent in which everyone is sent back to the EF, but something went wrong and now Killian has to break the curse. Rated M with 25ch. ao3 and ff.

From @itsalostgirlthing on Tumblr, ao3 and ff 10 Things I Hate About Killian Jones is a modern HS AU based on the movie. Victor and Mary Margaret come up with an elaborate scheme to get Victor into Ruby’s good graces by pairing notorious player Killian Jones with loner Emma Swan. Rated T with 11ch. ao3 and ff.

From somethingalltogether on ao3 and Somethingalltogether on ff Accidental Acceptance is a season 3 canon divergent one shot. Killian accepts Pan’s deal. The consequences are devastating. Rated E one shot. ao3 and ff.

To Succeed Is Not to Win is a canon divergent WIP where Hook finally succeeds in getting his revenge. Emma is caught in the aftermath. Rated M with 5ch so far. ao3 and ff.

From @asthewheelwills on Tumblr, fardareismai on ao3 *Let’s Go Steal a One-Time Thing is a CS Leverage fic. A Hacker, a Hitter, a Thief, and a goal. Now all they need is an honest person to show them how to reach it. Rated T with 6ch. First and only part (for the time being) of the series Let’s Go Steal Ourselves a Happy Ending.

From @ashar663 on Tumblr, ashar663 on ao3 and ff Professor Jones is a modern AU where Killian is a professor of Maritime History who falls for his graduate student Emma Swan. Now complete on ff, only 9ch posted on ao3. Rated M.

Through the Hat is a canon divergent from 2X1 Broken. Instead of Emma and Mary Margaret falling through the hat, only Emma does and she lands in the sea where Captain Hook saves her. Rated M WIP with 7ch so far. ao3 and ff.

From @initiala on Tumblr, InitialA on ao3, Initial A on ff Storybrooke Downs Series featuring (in order) Little Bits of Fluff, rated G one shot, ao3 and ff. Grocery Stick, rated G two shot, ao3 and ff, Dark Horse (main fic), rated M with 28ch, ao3 and ff. Fruit of the Alder Tree, rated T one shot, ao3 and ff. Got the Bit Between Your Teeth, rated T one shot, ao3 and ff. The Forest for the Trees, rated M one shot, ao3 and ff. Horse of a Different Color, rated T one shot, ao3 and ff. Get Back on the Horse (That Bucked You), rated E one shot, ao3 and ff. This series is set in the world of Storybook Downs, a prestigious race horse training facility. The one shots give background to and differing perspectives of events in the main fic.

From @victorias-tales on Tumblr, secretless_vicki on ao3, Victoria-Ashlyn on ff All In a Days Work is a modern AU WIP in which Killian is a con man and Emma is the FBI agent intent on bringing him down. Until he scores his biggest con yet by convincing the FBI to hire him and partnering with Emma. Rated M with 6ch so far. ao3 and ff.

From @ripplestitchskein on Tumblr, Ripplestitchskein on ao3 Light of All Lights is a fairytale in 5 parts. What happens when the ship that Killian “Deckhand Hook” Jones is on crashes on the Dark Swan’s island? Contains dark fairy tale elements. Rated E with 5ch.

From @scapeartist on Tumblr, scapeartist on ao3, ScapeArtist on ff Surf and Turf Wars is a modern AU featuring CaptainCharming BroTP. Killian and David are best friends who own different restaurants in the same town. Will a potential for a Michelin Guide critic and 3 star rating come between the two men? Rated G with 4ch. ao3 and ff

From @swanslieutenant on Tumblr, twistedroses on ao3 Star Struck is a modern AU where Emma hits TV star Killian Jones with her car without realizing who he is. Rated T one shot.

A Place in Time is a modern AU where the biggest missing persons case of all time lands in agent Emma Swan’s lap. Thousands of people appear in a flash of white light at a lake in the middle of winter. Some have been missing for decades or even centuries, including a certain pirate, but haven’t aged a day since their disappearance. Rated T WIP with 9ch so far.

From @this-too-too-sullied-flesh on Tumblr, wtvoc on ao3 If One Only Remembers to Turn on the Light is her new AU. Killian sets up his booth at the local farmers market each week, and each week he sees her. This summary in hardly any way accurately summarizes what is going on in the fic. It’s only the original setting and it goes in a very unexpected and fascinating direction. Rated M WIP with 2ch so far.

The Next Wounded Soul is a EF AU where Lieutenant Killian Jones has been wounded in the war against the Dark One. He is attended by a noble woman of the kingdom. Will he ever find her again? Rated E with 12ch.

Theoretically is a modern AU where Killian’s gift to Emma for her 30th birthday is to prove to her that he really is as good as he says he is. Rated E with 4ch.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOSER Is a modern AU where Emma mistakenly texts a stranger when wishing an old friend happy birthday. They continue to text and eventually meet. Rated E with 3ch.

Waiting is a canon compliant deleted scene set in season 4. Pirates take, Killian waits. Rated M one shot.

From @sotheylived on Tumblr, sotheylived on ao3 Dare Over Truth is a modern AU where Emma is a tattoo artist who joins her friends, including Killian, for Truth or Dare every week. Killian never turns down a dare, until he does.

From @gingerchangeling on Tumblr and ao3, firechangeling on ff A Darkness for the Light is a EF AU where Princess Emma must give herself to Dark Hook if she has any hope of saving her family and her kingdom. Rated E WIP with 22ch so far. ao3 and ff.

The Disasters series is a series of one shots named after a different natural disaster. All rated E. Includes Tornado, ao3 and ff; Tsunami, ao3 and ff; Landslide, ao3 and ff; and Wildfire ao3 and ff.

From @ohmyodonghue on Tumblr, melissa13 on ao3, Melissa Black13 on ff Dead at Heart is modern vampire AU. When women start being murdered in her small town, Sheriff Emma Swan has to turn to 300yr old vampire Killian Jones for help. Rated M WIP with 8ch so far. ao3 and ff

From @iminwinnipegthatsincanada on Tumblr, BrittJK on ao3 and ff Hit Me With Your Best Shot is a modern AU where Emma and Killian are captains on opposing dodge ball teams. Rated T with 8ch. ao3 and ff

Nothing Beats a Fresh Pair of Socks Out of the Dryer is a rated G one shot where Emma gets a match on her dating app with her biggest celebrity crush Killian Jones. ao3 and ff

From @secret-captain-swan-blog on Tumblr, secret_cs_fics on ao3 Castle on a Hill is a modern day lost princess AU. Rated T WIP with 8ch so far.

From Ice_Cube44 on ao3, IceCube1 on ff To Repair a Heart was her January Joy submission where Killian is a pediatric heart surgeon in the 1950′s and Henry Swan is his patient. Rated T one shot that will eventually get a second part. ao3 and ff.

Message In a Bottle is a modern AU where Killian finds a message in a bottle written almost 20yrs ago. He sets out to find the writer, Emma Swan. Rated T with 5ch. ao3 and ff.

From @stophookingatmeswan on Tumblr, ao3 and ff These Nights Never Seem to Go to Plan is a modern AU where Emma and Killian are both cops. As their lives start to interact professionally, they realize that they’re also drawn together personally. Rated E with 21ch. ao3 and ff.

Forged in Fire is a new multi chapter with 1ch so far. Killian is a master bladesmith and Emma is new on the scene. Rated E.

Guitars and Scarred Hearts is a modern Rock Star!Killian AU. Rated E WIP with 6ch so far.

From @bleebug on Tumblr, bleebug on ao3 ***Every Letter series which includes Every Letter, Every Touch, and Every Letter: Ten Years. EL tells the story of a class project which brings together international pen pals Emma and Killian. They grow up writing to each other. Rated T with 10ch. ET is rated E with 5ch and takes place during various EL chapters. ELTY is a one shot of Emma and Killian’s 10th relationship  anniversary.

From @nowforruin on Tumblr, ao3 and ff The Stars Walk Backwards is a modern AU in which Emma and Killian meet up on the same day every year. Rated M with 4ch. ao3 and ff

The Trouble With Faking It is a modern AU in which Emma is hired by Regina to help improve Hollywood bad boy Killian Jones’s image. Rated E with 26ch. ao3 and ff.

Bar Nights and Christmas Lights is a modern AU where Emma’s most recent one night stand shows up when and where she least expects him. Christmas 2 shot. Rated T. ao3 and ff.

Lost Souls and Rabbit Holes is a modern AU where Ruby decides she’s going to help Killian get back on his feet by hiring him as a bartender at The Rabbit Hole. This is a CS fic. Rated M with 27ch. ao3 and ff.

Seabrooke is a modern AU where Sheriff Emma is caught up in a web of betrayal and treachery that she never would have expected in the tiny town of Seabrooke. Rated M with 21ch. ao3 and ff.

A Change in the Wind is a canon-divergent where Regina enlists Captain Hook to keep Emma Swan from coming to Storybrooke on her 28th birthday. Rated M with 24ch. ao3 and ff.

From misslizanne on ao3 The Joy of Rediscovering You is a modern AU where musician Killian Jones is forced into the care and protection of bodyguard Emma Swan. He remembers her as the employee at the record shop he used to frequent. Can he convince her that he's the same man he was then? Rated M with 4ch.

From @drowned-dreamer on Tumblr, Drowned_dreamer on ao3 and Drowned-dreamer on ff The Ghost and Emma Swan is a modern AU in which single mom Emma Swan falls in love with and buys Misthaven cottage, unaware that a very old and very deceased pirate still lives there. Rated M with 18ch. ao3 and ff.

From YouSaidWho on ao3 Burn is an EF AU featuring CS, OutlawQueen, and TinkFire. Darkness gathers at the edge of the kingdom. What will it take to defeat it? Rated E with 26ch.

From @nothingimpossibleonlyimprobable on Tumblr and ao3, NothingImpossible on ff Secrets and Spies, Truth and Lies is a modern AU where CIA hacker Emma Swan is paired up with MI6 brothers Liam and Killian Jones in a mission to bring down an ex-spy. Rated M with 10ch. ao3 and ff

Mother Tongue is a rated T one shot based on the head canon that Liam and Killian would speak Irish to each other when they were alone.

From @belovedcreation on Tumblr, BelovedCreation on ao3 That’s the Way I Wanna Rock ‘n Roll is a modern AU where Rock Star Killian starts getting death threats. Enter security expert Emma Swan. Rated M with 31ch.

Sparkling is an EF AU. Emma is cursed and her disfigurement guarantees she will never find her True Love. That doesn’t stop her parents from continuing to search. Pirate captain Killian Jones impersonates a prince in order to find gold, he finds True Love instead. Rated G with 18ch.

Ships Passing in the Night is an EF AU. Emma is looking to con the biggest fish in the sea, Captain Hook. But what if he’s been looking for her too? Rated M one shot.

As Seen on TV is a modern AU where Emma and Killian are on a reality TV show. Rated T one shot.

The Best Things Happen When You’re Dancing is a modern AU where Emma and Killian meet up at swing dancing festival. Rated G one shot.

That’s all for tonight. The remaining recs should be up early next week. Thank you all for reading and your patience! Tagging those authors on Tumblr. @whisperofgrace @itsalostgirlthing @asthewheelwills @ashar663 @initiala @victorias-tales @swanslieutenant @ripplestitchskein @scapeartist @this-too-too-sullied-flesh @sotheylived @gingerchangeling @ohmyodonghue @iminwinnipegthatsincanada @secret-captain-swan-blog @stophookingatmeswan @bleebug @nowforruin @drowned-dreamer @nothingimpossibleonlyimprobable @belovedcreation

[stormbine]

TL;DR At the Bottom

[waves in decker]

Hey there Tumblr, long time no see. Finally decided to take some time to update y'all on what I've been up to, since admittedly I haven't been posting here as much as I would like. ^^

I got back from a much needed vacation a few weeks ago, enjoying and being slightly jelly of how cheap food was abroad. Wish I could live on what amounts to four to eight dollars a day. ;-; But then, the economy would be tanking if that were the case.

Most of my disappearance from Tumblr has been due to my current project; what started as a fun creepy pasta thread I posted on the /cyb/ board of dangeru.us* quickly evolved into one of the better roleplays I’ve ever had the honor of participating in, much less GM’ing, not unlike a game of DnD except minus the dice and character sheets. And cyberpunk. And cannibal AI’s that are really viruses. So much horror.

Nearly three months later, I once again find myself the admin of a new Discord, running in tandem with the denizens of /cyb/ a ARG that became an RP that became an ARG again. But the meat of this new project, beyond the cyphers (which I had to get a crash course on) and the ridiculous amount of in-game, fade to black sex, is the idea of chaotic fiction. 

In those three months of roleplay and ARG material, conducted via both Discord and /cyb/, I’ve learned more about my characters than I possibly had in the past few years, bouncing them around in my head. Or at least, I filled in the blanks. A “seats of their pants-er” writer tends to form whatever pops into their head on paper and then fill in the details later. But what was most empowering to me was, in addition to Tumblr, I found myself a new, fresh group of people to call an audience for the first time in over five years. 

And it was beautiful. Tiring, slightly stressful, and took up a lot of my time at work, but my god, was it beautiful.

And it’s still going strong. I’ve since slowed down the pace of the ARG/RP because my fingers are beginning to suffer the slow, but painful, effects of RSI, but activity in our little group hasn’t dropped at all. Even without my input, they continue to add to and build a universe that, while based upon and inspired heavily by other fictions, maintains for itself a sort of organic originality that can only come from creation for creation’s sake.

So I wondered... could I use this? Could this “thermodynamic miracle” provide an impetus for my own success in the creative writing field?

We shall see. For now, I’ve taken the steps of creating a Patreon for myself, which thus far is proving to be a lot more complicated than I expected. ^^;;

Not sure what I expected, really. That’s one of the problems of trying to emulate someone else’s success- they always make it look easy. 

So on my plate right now, I’m trying to get back into the habit of posting ORIGINAL CONTENT(TM) on Tumblr again, if only so I can continue to keep the creative well sharp, so you don’t need to see anymore disaster pieces like that god awful bar scene I derped out a few months ago and promptly forgot about. Or maybe some of them will turn out like that- writing consistently means you won’t be able to dig up a diamond every time. 

I typically try to maintain a ratio of 60/40 to 70/30 original content/reblogging fun stuff, but lately it feels like my drafts section is racing to overwhelm actual posted content with nonsense. Good thing I keep that section around to store writing ideas, right? 

Annnndd now i’m blabbering, so thank you once again if you’ve read this far.

TL;DR: I found a comfy place called danger/u/ to chill at and spend most of my social life on, and from there, made a new group of friends whom I am now roleplaying heavily with while also running something that is vaguely ARG like. 

I’m going to start posting regularly here again, I promise.

I’m setting up a Patreon and also a Ko-Fi, and will post them later.

I’m gonna be revamping the blog so there aren’t anymore broken SSL stuffs.

In retrospect 3/4 of this TL;DR wasn’t even in the original post but eyyy look, new stuff!

Talk to you again soon!

-Stormy

*Danger/u/ is a fictional in-game parody of 2ch/4ch in the excellent cyberpunk waifu flat-tending simulator vn, Va-11, Hall-a. You can visit this shiba-piss-smelling website at dangeru.us. Remember, there are no guys on the internet, only g/u/rls. 

[perfectackeracy]

My inbox - birthday edition

OH HEY GUESS WHO’S TURNING 23?

Alright I think I’ll do a last trainwreck of asks while awaiting the CR translation. I’ll be a bit busy this month with the exams approaching and us beginning to look at undergrad school applications. It’s gonna be tough.

Could be because of their personalities, because the drama’s been centered around them too much lately or because everybody’s been dying left and right when the main trio was left intact. Even of you pick the trio structure, you’ll notice there’s at least a member missing. It just feels... empty. Besides, for the ones who are still interested, Isayama still promised the drama of them parting ways and if anything, that chapter is anchoring it.

The beach chapter was foreshadowed by many to be an ending chapter, yet it marked the beginning of the final arc, with Eren making a resolve to kill the enemy at the other side. I’m sure neither Armin or Mikasa won’t stand for it.

I hardly doubt it. At this point I’m expecting offscreen deaths, even Reiner’s since Isayama decided to accelerate things. I’ve stated in previous asks before that Ymir is probably dead and now that Annie’s been fossilized, the chances of her coming back are slim. This is the last arc and things are going straightforward from now on.

Is standing next to each other counts as canon ok sure but then that means Hange/Roy is canon as well in this chapter.

Oh whatever... Just go argue with the anon below as much as you want.

(Unless it’s actually your inner shipper sending me those messages...)

Underwhelming sure, but it had its moments like Flocke or Eren fighting for freedom by sailing to another continent so they can slaughter people who are against them.

ningen-suki was truly a blessing. It’s a shame she’s gone because she managed to tone the already flaming wank from 84 down by sharing people who experienced the same situation. Blame the fandom, as always. Unfortunately my Japanese isn’t very good and I still need the help of tools like Jisho to translate some words. The manga is easier since it has kana next to kanji.

Yes. CR official release in 29 days. Much better than 42 days.

Considering how everybody looked at him bewildered when holding Historia’s hand, it’s safe to assume he kept his mouth shut for a year. It’s likely he found out about Zeke for the final confrontation as well. 

What he saw was Grisha pleading for Frieda to kill the titans who destroyed the wall for the sake of the people in the district, but that triggered the memories about how destroying the titans was a taboo and that’s why Eren was so shocked. There might be more to it since the flashback progressively zoomed to her face, probably showing him why the First King sheltered himself behind walls, got horrified and made a resolve.

He definitely pointed not only at Marley but at every nation who wanted Eldia extinct. He probably had an idea about how he should invade them thanks to the coordinate and the crossing memories but right now he just shows he has to. That’s his mission.

The problem is leaving room for those mourning. You could see Levi’s face at some moments being deeply affected by Erwin’s fate and eventually death from chapter 83 to nowadays. Same with Reiner who shed the longest tear at the thought of Bert being eaten as he’s powerless to do anything. There’s emotion, but I definitely wouldn’t have been happy if the chapter was exclusively about them moping the floor for pages and pages when there’s barely any room left for the final arc (3-5 volumes).

Oh hey anon.

Judging the way you’re calling Eren, I assume you’re from Twitter, right?

Anyway I’m glad your salt is very vocal and on point too. It’s so refreshing to read you should start an account (if it wasn’t made already) and join the fest. I guess I was “okay” with the explanation because titans were progressively demoted to the rank of mindslaves to an even bigger enemy. Legends told us they were monsters forcing humans to retreat when in fact they’re from a minority overseas belonging originally to the same people, sentences to eternal wandering as giant immortal zombies. Using zombie logic (herds, zombie traps) I guess I swallowed the pill better.

I really agree about how it renders the serumbowl kind of... absurd? In story it’s even pointed out that the “hell” logic is only worthy in Levi’s choice. Everybody outside the SC thought it was a really weird/stupid decision, to the point I’m sometimes wondering if it wasn’t just an excuse timed at the wrong moment (like everything during the serumbowl) to out Erwin from the story in order to create a bad ending. 

Oh well... Kenny didn’t sink in complete despair after Uri died, probably because of his last resolve that crumbled into pieces. Mikasa neither, despite Eren and Armin programmed to die. I honestly think battling Zeke again is what’s keeping Levi moving. Might explain why I’m finding him more ~lively~ than expected. He’s bearing with things as usual during the timeskip.

That’s he’s a snake. That he clearly has his own agenda. In those last pages, he strangely adopted his father’s speech (referring to the crawling titan as a “countryman”), meaning he’s adopting his beliefs as well. Even when Eren’s pointing the horizon, Hange can’t help but look surprised. I hope they’re holding their suspicions from chapter 89, because I really feel Eren’s even ready to go... rogue.

Since they reached the outpost, I assume they can easily claim that piece of land, waiting for Marley to arrive with a boat, make a surprise attack, hijack it and sail to the continent. Therefore, no chance for them to inject them with the serum.

Still ti wouldn’t be advisable to penetrate the enemy territory knowing their technology is advanced by centuries on top of them having a better knowledge about the titans in general.

Stay tuned for 2ch reactions I guess. But I’m far from being a good translator so I seldom check the comments here.

Of course, the story doesn’t actually prevent the warriors from having a flashback. If we’re allowed to explore the same scenes 150k times under different perspectives, surely we can go back to how Zeke failed, to how Reiner tried to cope with losing Bert, etc, etc...

[japanessie]

Hey! I found your blog recently and I also just started listening to MFS and I really like their music. I'm a bit lost as to where to start to learn more about them and their motivation/thoughts behind their music since it's been a couple years since they've debuted. What would you suggest?

Hello (^^)v Welcome to the fandom.

I’m guessing you probably discovered them through their more popular songs like ALONE, 不可逆リプレイス or the more recent ones like Missing You. Firstly, too many people get caught up in singer Hiro’s family relations and ignore the other members. So, I would highly encourage a new fan to NOT follow that crowd XD

There are basically 4 aspects to MFS that all fans need to know OR you won’t understand the band and what diehard fans talk about:

1. Band members & the personnel changes.2. Their musical roots especially the main songwriter Sho Tsuchiya + their twin band named fromus.3. Hiro’s lyrics in relations to his life story.4. The important people in their team especially their boss GEN, A&R exec KTR (Kentaro Suzuki) from Japan Music System (JMS) & circle of friends. Also, their earliest mentor K ( Kei Goto) the late singer of Pay Money To My Pain (PTP).

BAND MEMBERS

1. Sho Tsuchiya ~ leader, guitarist, main composer (currently only functions behind the scene & as a non-touring member)2. Nob @ Nobuaki Katou ~ bassist3. Teru @ Teruki Nishizawa ~ guitarist (many like to categorize him as rhythm guitarist when Sho was in but I personally disagree because he played both lead & rhythm guitars even from the 1st album)4. Kid'z ~ drummer (officially joined on 3 Mar 2016)5. Hiro @ Hiroki Moriuchi ~ vocalist, lyricist6. Masack @ Masaki Kojima ~ drummer (officially left on 3 Mar 2016)

Note: MFS current members “deactivated" from public social media in early 2016. So, don’t bother looking XD

PERSONNEL CHANGES

Sho’s hiatus:Sho remains as a member. He announced his hiatus in October 2015. I won’t call it “inactive" like some people do because he’s still composing with them and most recently served as the Sound Producer for ANTITHESE. He’s just not a touring member for now. He didn’t give specific reason other than family matter.

Drummer change:Masaki didn’t state why he left but it looked like he didn’t want to be tied down to only one genre of music. He was active playing outside MFS before his departure. So, he probably wanted that musical freedom even though he loves MFS. But his decision was enough to badly crush the two youngest members at the time, Hiro and Teruki, from what I observed. Those two younger men were still emotionally dealing with Sho’s hiatus at that moment.  Kid'z is their friend / labelmate who had always got along well with Teru & Hiro. He had worked together with Sho & Nob before too. Co-incidentally, his band officially split up in Nov 2015. So, he was the natural choice to replace Masaki. But Kid'z was drumming as a sessionist musician for singer ナノ(nano) at the time MFS took him. He stopped using his real name and took on a stage name Kid'z* after that. 

* I personally don’t use his real name in public anymore out of respect for his decision. Understandably, he was initially worried about MFS fans’ reaction. Also, it was and probably still is an awkward situation for him regarding his former bandmates when their band split up and he went to their biggest rival band just a few months later. So, I chose to respect his wish to start anew.

THEIR BEGINNING

On my blog so far, the interview that tells their formation year story the most is this one from GEKIROCK.

MFS GEKIROCK Interview March 2016 Translation

The band did describe how they got together in this video interview around minutes 01:42 to 02:58.

My Japanese listening ability is not up to that point yet though, sorry. Hiro explained how he and Sho met at a PTP concert. Couldn’t catch what Sho said about Hiro & Masaki with the music playing in the background :-/ Hiro also said he and Teru knew each other when they were high school students. Well, the GEKIROCK interview is a pretty good picture of their history.

FOR OLD PHOTOS of MFS, check out these places:

My First Story Unofficial fanpage on FBMy First Story Thailand fanpage on FBex-drummer Masaki Kojima’s Twitter @kojimasa 

THEIR TWIN BAND fromus

Ignore whatever musical comparison people made about them and OOR. The real band to compare MFS to is their real twin band fromus, a piano-rock unit. I made an entry about them here.

http://japanessie.tumblr.com/post/140215899677/meet-fromus-mfs-real-twin-band

I personally feel that musically, MFS first two albums are the direct guitar edition fromus. Just take MFS, change the singer & then the guitars to piano. You’ll get fromus.

OTHER MUSICAL INFLUENCES

They do have influences from old school hard rock & metal. Sho and Nob are already in their 30s. Both men said they started on guitar with British rock legend Deep Purple’s Smoke On The Water. Guitarist Teruki grew up with a heavy-metal-music-loving father and would often cite Ozzy Osbourne and Metallica as his early influences.

DISCOGRAPHY

If you want to see their musical & lyrical evolution, try to listen to their songs chronologically from the 1st album to the current work.

Albums & Singles

1. MY FIRST STORY ~ MV Second Limit & Take It Back2. THE STORY IS MY LIFE ~ MVs The Story Is My Life & The Reason3. 最終回STORY (Saishukai STORY)4. BONEDS (a joint 4-band project in which they contributed 2 songs)5. BLACK RAIL ~ MVs Black Rail & FAKE6. 不可逆リプレイス ( Fukagyaku Replace) ~ their breakthrough song IMO7. 虚言NEUROSE ~ MVs 虚言NEUROSE, Child Error & Someday (lyrics MV available on Livehouse iOS App & STORYTELLER website)8. ALONE ~ MVs ALONE & 失踪FLAME * 9. ANTITHESE ~ MVs The Puzzle (exclusive for STORYTELLER members only), Missing You (there’s another STORYTELLER-only version too) & Last Call

Update: 12 Jan 2017. Sorry I forgot the MVs from the ALONE single XD

They also have a special 2-track single dedicated to band leader Sho Tsuchiya, released to the public at the Budokan called:

We’re Just Waiting 4 You (available at MAGIC ROOM while stock lasts)

DVD Collection so far:

1. THE STORY IS MY LIFE Final at Shibuya Club Quattro (bundled with 最終回STORY) ~ the only official DVD released when Hiro still sported his natural black hair colour.2. The Ending of the Beginning at Ebisu Liquidroom.3. BONEDS Tour Movie (with AIR SWELL, BLUE ENCOUNT, SWANKY DANK).4. ITSUWARI NEUROSE Tour Final at Shinkiba Studio Coast.5. MFS at A.V.E.S.T. Vol.9 (released as a free bonus for ANTITHESE Pre-order)

TIDBITS Info (^_-)

Hiro called 虚言NEUROSE creation process as “creating a human-like superhero" & the sound as “listening to the radio in the city“. Does that make any sense to you? LOL. Read what he said in this interview:

Hiro’s Interview with Rockin’ On Japan magazine Jan 2015

HIRO’s LYRICS

Sho let Hiro be in charge of lyrics writing from the start (from an interview for Yamaha Music).

Hiro comes from a famous family thanks to his parents and his successful brother. As a result, he was heavily thrashed on the internet by people who disliked his “easy entry” into the music industry. Hiro used to be very active on Twitter but the criticism against him soon turned into cyber-bullying. I personally had seen the cruel things people wrote about him on Japanese 2ch forum.

I can only guess what happened that drove Hiro to leave social media. Other than abusive online comments, some people probably took advantage of his Twitter presence by sending inappropriate messages or even being intrusive about his brother Taka’s personal life. He tweeted an angry response about 2ch on 14 Feb 2013. Then he wrote on his blog on Ameblo (now deleted / deactivated(?)) that “people’s words can hurt". A few months later, he tweeted “I started blocking fucked up people" in English. Not long after, he tweeted his final tweet “Goodbye forever" and abandoned Twitter in Sept 2013.

He then channeled his anger through the song BLACK RAIL in 2014. He explained it in this interview.

Hiro MFS Rolling Stone Japan Aug 2014 Interview Translation

From then on, a lot of his lyrics reflected what he was going through while writing them.

It must be noted that the special project singles ALONE & 不可逆リプレイス (Fukagyaku Replace) were written for the themes of those projects. Hiro talked at length about ALONE around its release and there are a bunch of them that I posted on this blog.

For details on ALONE Project with HAL College, read these posts:

HAL Project Special Musician Interview with MFS Translation

MY FIRST STORY Flying Postman Interview Translation

Hiro’s ALONE Blog Translation

What is HAL Project & HAL College?

不可逆リプレイス / Fukagyaku Replace was made for the historical anime Nobunaga Concerto. Interesting to note that Hiro wrote the lyrics not from the main character Saburo’s point of view but the other guy Michi. The lines, “I don’t know why but you saved me ………… “ all the way to “I will follow you ….. keep you close to me,” were directly inspired by what Michi said to Saburo in the finale or Episode 10.

The lyrics of Someday are for the late K.Hiro said in Kaohsiung, Taiwan that “This is a very important song to me,“.

His blog entry translation on K’s death

ANTITHESE Lyrics & Hiro’s personal stories

The Puzzle & Tomorrowland are about his heartbreak over Masaki’s departure.Home is about his family who split up after his parents divorced.

IMPORTANT PEOPLE IN MFS TEAM1. GEN ~ boss, owner of INTACT Records, owner of Zephyren, organizer of AVEST Project, formerly of Subciety clothing brand.Twitter : @Zephyren_genInstagram : Zephyren Gen2. KTR (Kentaro Suzuki) ~ A&R + marketing exec of JMS, marketing exec of Deviluse clothing, regularly seen at MFS video shoots and concerts.Twitter : @kkktttrrr, Instagram: Kentaro Suzuki3. The late K @ Kei Goto ~ vocalist of Pay Money To My Pain (PTP), mentor in MFS early days.4. Nori (producer), Makiko (merchandising) but she’s better known now as the lady who covered Rassungorerai with Hiro XD

* Update (Jan 2018): I believe Makiko is not in the staff team anymore but she remains a close friend. Here is the YouTube link to the video of her and Hiro.5. Japan Music System (JMS) ~ the music distribution company specializing in indie music and the one that markets/promotes MFS musicYouTube Channel: JMSTVOnline shop for bands’ merchandise: MAGIC ROOM ONLINE STORE

5. Circle of friends among many:  Shirakawa-san (SAKAEYA clothing shop manager) ~ the members regularly visit his shop.Twitter: @sakaeyatenchonano, SWANKY DANK, AIR SWELL ~ artists they had musically collaborated with.

The funny interview with Hiro & KOJI about the Sink Like A Stone collaboration in which Hiro admitted the song’s high notes were difficult to sing is here.

STORYTELLER Fan Clubhttps://xxxstorytellerxxx.comAll MFS members let go of their individual public social media after the club was launched in 2016. If you’re interested to join, feel free to ask questions on how to do that.

In case you have an iOS mobile device ……..

JMS created a Japan-only iOS App called LIVEHOUSE where they feature videos from JMS artists. The videos vary from live performances, interviews, behind the scenes etc. However, if you create a different Apple ID specifically for Japan iTunes account, you can still download the App and watch those videos even if you don’t live in Japan.

*Update (12 Jan 2017): You will then get to watch videos like this one!

**Update (15 June 2017): JMS decided to stop the App by 31 May 2017.

Lastly yet very important, don’t believe any ridiculous claim about Hiro and his brother Taka hating each other because they don’t. You’ll find such comments at some point, I’m sure. These two brothers love and support each other away from the public eye and rightfully keep their family relationship private.

I hope that will give you a good start (^_-)

[grubisarukavina]

How to Compare A/V Receiver Power Specs

Like many consumer electronics purchases, an A/V receiver is a significant investment. Not only will you probably be spending at least $600 on one, but it will have a large effect on how the audio coming from your speakers sounds. In short, anything you run through your A/V receiver will only sound as good as the level of quality that it can support. So when you are shopping for a receiver, how can you tell which models are up to the task of giving you the top notch performance you need? Read on and we’ll break down the ins and outs of receiver comparison.

This is a huge topic, so for the purposes of this article, we are just going to focus on comparing A/V receiver power. We’ll run through a few key things to look for as you compare the power of different models, as well as identifying some of the tricks that manufacturers use to inflate their specs.

Weight Matters

It sounds simple, but it’s true, one easy to way to identify if a receiver has a quality power supply and transformer is to look at the weight of the unit. Cheaper power supplies and transformers and their associated components will be smaller and more light weight. Take a look at the Pioneer Elite VSX-LX102. It’s the entry level model in their Elite line and will only set you back a modest $499. The weight is listed at 19 lbs, which is pretty light for an A/V receiver. By contrast, the Onkyo TX-NR585, which is in a similar price range and lists comparable specs, comes in at 26 lbs, over 30% heavier. Even though they are both listed at 80 watts/channel, my money would be on the Onkyo to actually deliver more power in a real world situation because it’s likely to use higher quality components. Sure, this is conjecture, but it’s worth noting that Onkyos are fairly legendary in terms of their bang for the buck and the power they provide. Pioneer’s reputation on the other hand is a bit more mixed with a lot of their accolades being based on features and video performance rather than power. Speaking of power, let’s take a look at what you need to pay attention to when comparing specs.

Deciphering the Power Spec

Go back to that spec page for the Pioneer Elite VSX-LX102 and look at the power specs right at the top on the left hand side. Notice how there are actually two specs listed, 170 W/ch (6 ohms, 1 kHz, THD 10 %, 1ch Driven) and then 80 W/ch (8 ohms, 20 Hz-20 kHz, THD 0.08 %, 2ch Driven, FTC). Pretty big difference there with one spec listing 170 watts/channel and then another showing only 80 watts/channel. So which power spec is correct? Well this where things get a bit tricky, because technically both specs are valid, but in the case of the 170 watts/channel number, it relies on very specific conditions that are highly unlikely to really happen. In order to actually get 170 watts out of this receiver, you’ll need to only be driving a single channel, that is only one speaker, and that speaker will need to be rated at 6 ohms and also will need to be to be only producing a 1 kHz tone. When will a speaker be producing just a 1 kHz tone? Only if you are running a test tone at that specific frequency, for all intents and purposes a speaker will never be producing only a single frequency during actual use. Oh and by the way, the Total Harmonic Distortion (THD) will be 10%, which means you’ll have cranked the volume to the point where your speaker is producing tons of noise and basically sound terrible. So as you can see, that spec is there merely to make the receiver look like it will provide more power than it really will under normal conditions. Now just about every receiver manufacturer does this, in fact if you look at the Onkyo TX-NR 585 page you can see the same thing, so Pioneer is far from the only guilty party here.

In fact, things have gotten better in recent years, it used to be that for some models they would only give you this inflated spec and not even bother with the more realistic version that the second one represents. Let’s go through that second spec to see what it tells us about the power. The 80 watts/channel spec is a much better indication of the power that the receiver will actually deliver. First off, it’s connected to an 8 ohm speaker, which will draw less power. Second, it’s when a full band signal is being produced, all the way from 20Hz-20KHz, which is the typical range of most music. Third, that THD spec which measures distortion is at .08%. Higher end receivers can get you an even lower THD rating, with some even down to .01%, but for a model in the $500 range this is acceptable. Finally, in this case the receiver is driving two channels instead of one. Now here we run into a little bit of fudging as for movies it is very common for five or even seven channels to be putting out sound at once, but at least we can rely on this spec for the power output for two channel music listening. Just keep in mind, when you are watching a movie you’re going to get less power from the receiver, a good bet would be in the vicinity of 60 watts/channel for this model.

Bench Testing: The Real Proof

The best way to find out what kind of juice you are going to get from a receiver is to try and find a review where they have put the receiver through a bench test and measured it’s actual power output. One publication that regularly includes a bench test is Sound & Vision. If you are looking at models definitely check their reviews first to see if they’ve put a particular receiver through the paces. As an example, their most recent review is the NAD T 758 V3 and here is their bench test or as they call it, the test bench, tomato, tomahto I suppose.

The NAD T 758 V3 is a fairly high end unit and priced at $1300, so we should expect it to test quite well and get reasonably close to their stated specs. Looking at Sound & Vision’s test, it came in at 100 watts/channel with two channels driven at 8 ohms with .1% THD. Over on the NAD site, they claim 110 watts with two channels driven within “rated distortion”. The “rated distortion” is fairly vague and could mean practically anything, but if we look lower we see that they are advertising a THD of .08%. So they are being a little dishonest, as according to the bench test at .08% THD, the power output would in fact be lower than 100 watts/channel. One nice thing that NAD does give you is a “full disclosure” power rating which is all channels driven, full range signal at .05% THD, which is quite low. This rating is 60 watts/channel according to NAD. However Sound & Vision found that there was an output of 66 watts/channel with all channels driven but with a THD of .1%. There may be some fudging going on here too, but it’s probably only on the order of about 5 watts or so. Overall, if we just look at the bench test, 66 watts/channel with a .1% THD with all channels driven is a pretty good level of performance and again, not too far off from what NAD states. As you can see, finding a bench test for a model you are interested in is an extremely valuable evaluation tool.

Transformers and Amplifiers: High End Designs

If you are in the market for a high end receiver, there are a couple things to look to ensure you are getting a high quality amplifier design. One is a toroidal transformer, which is a transformer that is in a ring or donut shape, that’s right donuts aren’t just for breakfast anymore! But seriously, because the donut shape is symmetrical it minimizes magnetic leakage from the transformer and also reduces electromagnetic interference to neighboring circuits. Essentially, it allows for less noise to be introduced by the transformer to the rest of the amplifier. Toroidal transformers are also more efficient, meaning that more power makes it to your speakers rather than getting lost to leakage. Now you aren’t going to see a toroidal transformer in most receivers under $3000 as they are the hallmark of a higher end design. A couple of examples of receivers that use toroidal tranformers are the Marantz SR8012 and the Anthem MRX 1120.

Another feature of a quality receiver is discrete amplification. In many lower end receivers the amplifiers for each channel can share circuitry and in some cases even power supplies. In a receiver with fully discrete amplifiers, each channel will have it’s own circuitry as opposed to an IC that incorporates all of the amplifiers into a single board. This reduces crosstalk between the channels which is another form of interference that can result in distortion. Marantz are famous for their discrete amplifier designs and even offer it in the relatively reasonably priced SR5012 model which sells for $999.

That wraps up our look at comparing A/V receiver power, now that you know what to look for you can make an informed buying decision the next time you’re in the market to upgrade this crucial part of your home theater. We hope you enjoyed it and as always, happy listening!

      How to Compare A/V Receiver Power Specs published first on https://medium.com/@123movieshub

[pinqan]

• A TIRED SLEEP CAN’T FIX

I was fifteen when I took my first dose of Ecstasy, with a girl. No, like — it made me fall for her, and I’m pretty sure it made me fall for a drug that flooded my brain with a Burning-Man’s-worth of dazes and hallucinations.

It’s just what Oxytocin does, it’s like your fairy godmother that can only be summoned by hardcore chemical man-made drugs. Good shit, in my opinion.

Only months before that, I’d done 2CB. A hallucinogen that wasn’t technically illegal at the time. Of course, it was banned and the whole supply dried out. I was scared; I mean E was already illegal, and I knew there was no guarantee that the feds wouldn’t bust whoever was making it for my state. I wasn’t willing to live in a world where I couldn’t roll my balls off a cliff at a moment’s notice.

That’s a saying somewhere, okay? Fuck off.

Henceforth, I moved to South Korea. The one place I could kind of call home, and a perfect place to go against the law considering it’s so goddamn premature. Mom said it’d work out somehow, plenty of jobs and opportunities, blah blah blah. A friend of mine gave me some advice while I was a dishwasher for a university, that you could use nutmeg to get high. It’s legit. I googled it. Nutmeg contains a psychoactive chemical called myristicin, but it’s also about 2 percent safrole. Safrole happens to be one of the main reagents for MDMA (and bingo, ecstasy).

I resolved to learn how to make it - mostly out of pure curiosity rather than criminal intent. I figure a lot of the weird kids get into this business because they love drugs and fall down the rabbit hole of studying how all these wacky chemicals affect their brains. One thing leads to another and then, that’s just it, you’re committing felonies as if you were in Grand Theft Auto.

My main problem, though, was the price. I added it up, and it’d take more than $2,000 (about 2,400,000 ₩) to buy what I needed. So far, I had two things going for me: a minimum wage job and a morphine habit. Not like anybody was cashing out a 401k to fund a drug hobby.

I went to the grocery store one day, as people do. I was most likely bordering on sober when I ran into a friend I’d known for years back in Japan. I’d just started studying chemistry, and I was just lipping about my plans and not really thinking straight. I gave out that I didn’t have the cash for this start-up, I don’t think I even had a tenth of what I needed. He didn’t even say anything besides, “I’ve got somebody you should meet.” And then, I ended up agreeing with him to set up a dinner.

He and I met with these guys who didn’t give off the right or the wrong impression. The neutral type, no personalities, suits that cost more than my XBox and Playstation combined and tripled. I’ll be referring to them simply as “the bad boys” from here on out, because I don’t think all of them wound up in prison yet and it’s probably best to not be all that specific given my current situation.

They asked me, so I answered. I walked them through what I’d need. One took notes and the other checked the list with some other cooks, and he went through his little process of seeing if it was legit enough. Days later they came back at like, two in the morning, and offered to shotgun me what seemed like a shit-ton of money. It didn’t take me long to find out they were big into the cocaine trade, and the few grand they were throwing my way might as well have been couch change to them, but at the time, I felt pretty fucking important.

The bad boys put me to an oath and to this very day, I don’t know why they’re called Cottonmouth. I assumed it was like the snake but our trademark is a fucking flower. Whatever, I guess I’m an actual part of it.

So, I rented a small house in the outskirts of the capital and started putting my lab together. I bought the best equipment I could and I went as far as anyone would go if a bunch of rich dudes offered to fund your happy little hobby. Whenever I ran out of money, I went back to the bosses and said, “I need more.” I wound up buying a condenser that cost two grand alone. I bought a brand new Toyota (don't ask how I got my license, because I didn't) and I built my own sandbox, completely filled with everything I’d ever want. I even had the stuff to start assembling a gas chromatograph. Basically, the Charizard of drug chemistry.

It was really hard to get sassafras oil for the E, so I started with a small bit – just five grams of safrole – in case I completely fucked it up. I had a few issues, I won’t go into detail but I wound up going to the Honeycomb (a forum full of drug chemists) and after asking some questions it finally worked. I wound up with about 2.5 grams of MDMA; enough for ten or fifteen normal doses, or five crazy-ass-teenage-raver doses.

But I was worried about using it or selling it, seriously. The final bit involved elemental aluminum as a reducing catalyst— and to get the aluminum oxide off the aluminum, you have to use mercury. You put the mercury into the reaction vessel, and you clear it out with sodium hydroxide.

It was a first for me so I wasn’t sure if I’d done it right, and since I’d used powdered mercury, it literally ended up without reaction. Practically invisible, so I had to take it on my faith that I’d gotten the poison out.

Drug cooks don’t exactly hold an elevated position in society, if you haven’t noticed. Some of you might even think I’m a terrible person for getting involved in this at all. Not like you’d tell at a first glance, I mean — I’ll tell you that I haven’t been sleeping well and you’d believe that’s why I look so shitty. But I got into making drugs because I’d had so many good times on drugs. I wasn’t about to take the risk that the chemicals I made might hurt people. I had to find some way to test this stuff before I got distributions going.

Now, mind you and your manners before you keep reading – I had no other fucking choice. I wasn’t about to die because I willingly ingested mercury.

I took a rat, gave it a small dose and it lived whilst staggering out of the experience with a whole new appreciation for Bulgarian electronic music. The agenda called for a typical move, I tried it on myself with 10 mg. Then I increased the doses, little by little.

And it fucking worked. 

I called my friend over and I ran into my yard, jumping up and down with overcoming fascination by what we had done, what we were capable of doing, and what we’d end up doing.

 We were also probably on E, now that I think about it.

Listen, I got obsessed with the pure chemistry. I started plugging out things I knew that there was no market for – the 2CH, a few different mescaline compounds. These drugs weren’t exactly economical (a high dose for a reaction put the demand down low), but my friends wanted to try them, so I made a lot of experimental shit and gave it away. The most horrifying thing I wound up making was called DOB. It’s an incredibly powerful chemical, active at 1-3 mg. For reference, a small hit of Ecstasy is 100 times that size.

I ended up destroying it, because I didn’t really want to take it and having anything that powerful is terrifying. Imagine if I’d sneezed on the pile or something – a bit of that stuff gets in your nose, and you’re hallucinating for days. Unlike Acid, it’s got a low LD50, so a high enough accidental dose could have killed me.

I was also a bit reckless (what a surprise) particularly with the dichloromethane. A fairly common solvent, but back then, I wasn’t aware of how dangerous chlorohydrocarbons could be. It evaporates fast, and because I was a lazy teenage drug addict, I wounded up leaving it out. It got into my little breathing bubble and, well, I’m pretty sure I’m color blind. I found out later that these are classic symptoms of chlorohydrocarbon inhalation.

Not the end of the world, could’ve been worse.

Eventually I started making MDA. Basically a faster, off-brand version of ecstasy. You can go from safrole to MDA in just five hours if you use a dangerous reagent named tetranitromethane (TNM). It’s more explosive than TNT and it is unstable. I had to make this shit behind a blast shield, I kid you not. Safe temperature range was around 160 degrees Celsius. If the temperature went up slowly, you chuck ice on it as much as possible. If the temperature jumped abruptly, you run like hell, and maybe try to time your slow motion jump with the resulting house explosion.

But the bosses were big into coke, supplying endless kilos of the stuff. I was only one cook out of ten, or something. They were reckless about it, it’s a common trait with the people I associate myself with. They own a restaurant for money laundering, and it’s just so obvious to anyone who came around that no one actually went in there to eat. And if you did, you had no idea what the fuck you were surrounded by. People would go in for 15 minutes and walk out with no food. And this restaurant is doing $500,000 a year? More? Right, let’s just walk out of a restaurant with less than eight pounds of to-go boxes.

Not that I’m complaining about their unrealistic process. Sometimes I get half the money from their profit. That’s a pretty big cut, but the amount doesn’t really matter. It’s all dirty money. You can’t buy a car with it, you can’t waltz into a bank and put it in an account, and you certainly can’t save up and buy a house. So I go out every day and buy game systems, any game that sounded even remotely interesting (even Ubisoft – I’m so serious), groceries, and clothing. As long as it was under $500, no one cared that you paid in cash. I just have to look the part.

I got dark circles, I’d like to call myself seemingly good looking with a charming smile, I make sure I work out every morning, I meet a few girls every so often, I barely brush my hair and people actually like it; I could go on.

But boiled down : I’m a drug cook, I’m twenty-two, and I’m as realistic as unrealistic can get.