#one ringy dingy

[fry-house]

Throwback to the time my aunt got super drunk and lost her phone so she sent me this email asking me to help her find it

[macwantspeace]

Wow. With a printed phone book! Did I say Wow? And, and, omg, the handset is still attached. I'm on my fainting couch.

[via-rant]

The best line of SnapCube ever!!!

Shadow: There's one rule. No ringy, no dingy.

[spacetimesally]

The prototype Glympse Optiflux Cranial Amplifier unlocks latent telepathic abilities, allowing one to communicate psychically across great distances, or so says the handy manual, but when Sally telepathically comes into contact with an ancient cosmic entity thought to be long dead, she learns of its insatiable hunger for the higher dimensional bio-spark signatures of fleshly creatures in, "One Ringy Dingy to Death"

[scottiewaddle]

Friday's Foto Fun - One Ringy Dingy

[arosebyanyothername2016]

One ringy dingy

When the next times are now. Let’s live in the moment. As Life passes us by. Take our eyes off our phones. We’ll give it a try. The hours we are missing turn into days and then weeks. While sitting and dining with our closest of peeps. The abundance of notices through a ring or a chime. Distinguishing sounds as our anticipation climbs. An email, a text, a memory comes…

[the-firebird69]

There's a lot of people who think this guy is stupid and he is stupid is all over the map again didn't stupid s*** and it's doing it cuz he wants to piss people off bother them and he's going to regret it shortly and very shortly tonight is Ghostbusters 2 and it ends in the night I like the first one that ended this morning and he will have an issue and that issue is going to be pretty big what were you doing why you're supposed to be sitting there in a painting and he's been raping them and trying to take this stuff grabbing them up there and in character and also the stuff trying to say he's supernatural any fail no took some stuff and he's got some of them and they're going to get them back shortly cuz I hear him in the movie saying stuff he's your master and all scrap he's a huge huge a****** and saying that he's their master and s*** and so the escalating and he always used to imitate her it's not Gilda radner and it's not the other people there Jim Belushi or it's a lady and she was in a couple movies he liked and she's the one that says one ringing dingy and he knows who she is sort of it could be the grandkid of trump girl and once you to do the big cig ad cuz this guy's an a****** doesn't provide anything for anyone. So she said yeah and she's she's going to do it and she says it's a way to say it and she's going to put it that way and she's going to do the ad and he said he had a idea but not really the whole thing second smoke part of it and then she says one ringy sucks it again exhales in a cool way it says two ringing and then smokes it again and the rest is a mystery but really the cigarettes pretty big it looks like a small cigar and about half inch round and 4 inches long not including the filter. So it's the way they look when they smoke a decent cigarette or a few of them and it's really a kind of not a mystery but she's going ahead with the idea they're sending her a packet and she likes it the other one wants to do the 100s or the 120s and she says for the 120s you need to borrow that guy who's in the Titanic movie has to pick you up with his rolls in the front seat I guess and he has to ask you if you want a cigarette not the other way around just trying to pick you up and stuff and no that's not Trump either. Is agreeing to the ad and he says it should be the 120 is probably not mental and maybe gold or white gold or silver he says white gold case you can't really tell it looks like stainless steel I just want to he wants to pull up in a ghost and her son says it's kind of hard but we can do that kind of thing he says no no that's not what I mean damn it.

Thor Freya

[bookofwonders]

Mr. Foultree loved getting obscene notes from the more seasoned phone operators.

[fuckyeahtx]

One ringy-dingy........

[tmntgirlie]

TMNT Universe!Reader x Mikey

House Party

“The rules for House Party are pretty simple!” you announced rather confidently. “Here’s how it works. We choose one person to be the party’s ‘host’. They leave the room while we choose three or four other people to be ‘guests’. The guests will pick a character or thing to act like and the host has to guess who each guest is acting as.”

“So, it’s like a more complicated version of charades?” Michelangelo said slowly, rubbing the back of his head.

You smiled. “Kind of. The guests and the party host can talk to each other. The host can be as involved or as not involved as they want to. The game is over when the host correctly guesses each party guests’ identity.”

“There are eight of us,” Leonardo said. “So with one host and four guests, we will have three observers.”

‘I mean, at least he does quick math,’ you thought to yourself. “Who wants to be the party host?”

It was a few seconds before anyone spoke up. To your surprise, it was April who volunteered to host.

“Alright, so I just need you to leave the room until we call you back in, okay?”

It was still so weird to you to be here with them. Just kind of hanging out, partying, going shot for shot- did you mention Casey didn’t hold back on the alcohol? He brought enough to fill a small bar.

Let’s just say you weren’t cold. What you liked to call the ‘alcohol blanket’ was in full effect.

After taking another sip of your vodka kool-aid, you clapped your hands together. “Right. Four people need to volunteer to be the party guests.”

“I will,” Casey said quickly, holding up his half-empty beer bottle. “This sounds fun.”

“I want to be a party guest!” Michelangelo said right after him with a grin that just lit up the room.

You looked between Raphael and Vern with a smirk. You were internally counting on one of them to volunteer as well, just for the hell of it. Vern just kind of sat there and existed for the majority of the party. Participate, man.

After an overly dramatic sigh, Raph finally nodded. “Fine, I’ll do it.”

That left Vernon (Falcon guy, as you liked to call him), Leo, and Donnie.

“I’ll be the fourth,” Donatello said with a small smile. “This should be fun.”

After about ten minutes of arguing, ‘playful banter’, you had helped the four party goers figure out their personas. It was time to bring April in.

When you went out to grab her, you gave her the rundown of how it started. The host would enter and act like they were doing house-ly duties when there would be a ‘knock’ at the door. It was an imaginary door, of course.

You expected the ding-dongs to be as obnoxious as possible.

“Ringy-dingie! I’m ringing the doorbell!”

You were so thankful that you had already swallowed your drink. Mikey was going full-force.

“Answer the door, you fool!”

“I’m coming, I’m coming!” April looked overwhelmed already.

Next to you, Leo and Vern were trying to contain themselves. It was only just beginning.

Everybody was ‘in’. April continuously tried to start conversations with each of her four party guests, but was often interrupted by another guest. She looked about ready to pull her hair out.

“Does anybody want a drink? A snack?” April called out, throwing her hands to her sides with a huff.

This was going both better and worse than you had planned.

“I would love a beverage, darling!” Mikey drawled, giving April a wink. The accent was a mix of German and Japanese, and you grinned knowing exactly who he was impersonating.

After all, it had been decided ahead of time. All April had to do was figure it out.’

“Oh, are you an immigrant to this country?” April asked, pouring him an imaginary drink.

“No, darling, I am a business woman.”

“A business woman? What kind of business?”

“Oh, it is a secret, darling.”

Leonardo nudged your side. “Does it usually take this long?”

“For people who haven’t played before, it can take this long,” you mumbled back. “But it is funny to watch.”

The entire idea of this game came from an old high school memory. When you were done with any of your various arts classes (choir, band, art, those types), the entire class would play this game together. It usually happened on a Friday afternoon and was definitely the highlight of your week.

Ah, back when life was simple. But you wouldn’t trade it for anything now.

Raphael was loudly chatting to Donnie, you didn’t know if it was a nonsense conversation or a real one but there was a definite mention of-

“Capes! No capes!” Michelangelo exclaimed

“Edna Mode!” April said quickly, pointing to Mikey.

Mikey grinned, and you swore he winked at you as he gave a dramatic bow before taking his place at the sidelines next to you, Leonardo, and Vernon.

Ah, Vern. Everybody forgets about him. For good reason.

“How did I do, sweetcheeks?” He somehow squeezed himself between his eldest brother and you.

“You did good!” You were not blushing, you were definitely not blushing. Did he just call you sweetcheeks?

He’s just a flirt, you reminded yourself. It’s nothing personal.

“It’s kind of an adrenaline rush up there,” he continued. “I’ve never really performed for anybody like that before.”

“Makes sense, with how you guys have lived all your lives,” you said, taking another sip of your drink. 

It was just getting warmer and warmer in those sewers. Maybe it was just you.

It didn’t take much longer for April to figure out Raph was a cowboy from the Wild West, Donatello was playing himself (he thought it would be funny), and Casey…To be honest, you couldn’t remember what Casey decided to be. 

You were already going shot for shot with Mikey and Leonardo by that point, the party game all but forgotten.

You honestly couldn’t remember much of the party after that. You knew there had been pizza and chips and dip, but that was from before the games started. You were almost certain video games played some sort of part in it.

No, all you knew is that the next time you woke up, you could feel something hard, maybe a little rough, and bumpy laying next to you. The small night light across the room barely illuminated anything, but you could clearly see an orange band laying next to the bed.

Shit.

[macwantspeace]

One ringie dingie, two ringie dingies.

STOP MAKING ME FEEL OLD

[allthingsfern]

Saw this yesterday (05-08-20) while I was on my way to pick up dinner at one of my favorite restaurants in Sacramento and to buy some groceries. This car with the unicorn on top appeared in front of me just as I started driving. I followed it for about a mile, a couple of times losing it. (Good thing I live in a small town.) It made me very happy. And yes, I was using my phone to record while driving, but there was no other traffic and no one out on the street, as you can see. 

Afterward, when I got home, I was thinking about how cool this was, but then it hit me: This is the ultimate expression of privilege, even while it is also a heartwarming expression of loving creativity and a desire to spread a little physical distance joy. What I mean is that in poorer areas, you will not have someone be able to afford to drive around a big, expensive SUV with a big, expensive inflatable unicorn on top. And no, I am not criticizing the people who did it; I am grateful to them, because they brought a smile to my face and they gave me a beautiful surprise jolt of joy. Still, that does not negate that this is a perfect example of how COVID19 is revealing the great economic division in our system. So often life can be contradictory, so this COVID19 period we are living through is no different. 

Anyway, FYI about the music and ringtone. The song is “Agua Pa’a Ti,” sung by our beloved Celia (Cruz) with La Sonora Matancera, coincidentally, the band she left Cuba with in 1960. BTW, she is “our beloved Celia” to those of us in exile, outside Cuba. Even though her fame took hold in Cuba and parts of Latin America starting in the late 40s, the post-1959 Cuban government erased her and the famed orchestra from history in a very 1984 way as soon as they left the island. When she died in 2003, many around the world mourned her, but in Cuba, nada. To the government in Cuba, one of our great national treasures never existed, and all because of politics. However, she is memorialized by the Smithsonian Institute here and here. In 2006, the Smithsonian also had a Celia Cruz exhibition, which later travelled to several US museums. I was able to see it in Los Angeles’s California African-American Museum. And yes, while I was there I cried several times. 

The song you hear in the background is a prayer to the Afro-Cuban orisha Yemayá. The “one ringy dingy” (Lily Tomlin as Ernestine the operator, a popular Laugh-In from the late 60s; you can see a clip here) is my phone call ringtone. I got a call from a friend and because the music was coming from my phone via bluetooth, it stopped playing. The phone vibrates when I get a call, which is why the video is shaky.

Anyway, here is a video clip Celia and the Sonora Matancera performing “Agua Pa’a Ti.” I believe the clips in the video of Celia and the orchestra are either from Cuban TV, right before they left the island, or from one of their early TV appearances in exile. Sadly, BTW, the post-1959 Cuban government never allowed Celia to return to her native land. 

She did return to Cuba in 1990, to perform at Guantanamo. The clip below is the second part of a segment about her visit to Guantanamo, made after her death. One of the songs is “Por Si Acaso No Regreso,” which means In Case I Don’t Return. Makes me cry every time I listen to it. 

Our beloved Celia appeared in a couple of films, including The Mambo Kings. Below is montage of her scenes in the movie, which includes one of her singing a salsa song in English and one of her singing her classic, “Guantanamera.” It ends with her singing a duet with Albita: “Por Si Acaso No Regreso.”

Finally, two videos of her performing in Cuba. I know the first one was in Cuba for sure, because the “JUPIÑA” signs are for a Cuban soft drink called Jupña, which was a pineapple soft drink that kinda tastes like cream soda, and it was not produced in the US until the mid 60s or a little later.

Funny how writing about an inflated unicorn on top of an SUV turned into a nostalgic recollection.

Oh well.

Big physical distance hug.

@itstherealus

[nochiquinn]

campaign 2 episode 108: permadicked

I have a new keyboard, nobody's allowed to make fun of any typos in this

oh NO that art by naomi lord is so CUTE

I just got here why is sam cosplaying as hootie from hootie and the blowfish

replacing troy baker is MATT'S job, sam, stop that

TALKS

"does brian remember how to talk?" "no, it's been weird at home"

"aimless slashing"

oh no I want it

laura bailey: she's done puzzles

caduceus: oh thank god, validation

mala: is...is that IC Marisha? me: write what you know

sam what the FUCK

moon mommy

I mean not THAT long

"could be interesting" is caduceus for "do it for the gram"

well that fanfic just happened

one ringy-dingy

that's a fucking copout answer

and she knows it, look at laura's face

exandria spontaneously develops a third moon

in a scripted show that would be MASSIVE foreshadowing for something terrible happening to all those people

caleb r u ok

when was the last time he got for-actual drunk? was the the drinking contest? in - was it fucking hupperdook?

beau got conned into having a job

why is everybody in this episode making me so NERVOUS

caleb

caleb whatcha doin

has this just been stewing on caleb's mind the whole time? like he wasn't gonna not help jester but was he always planning to just...turn around and raise hell?

I mean I support hellraising but do you have a PLAN mr widogast

reverse-heal

everybody talking about their FEELINGS and their EMOTIONAL CONFLICT

and attacking MY feelings, as a parent, as veth always has and will undoubtedly continue to do

"I want to be wherever you are" welp there we go, actual tears

you know that part in hamilton where jefferson's like "can we get back to politics" and madison's in the back crying like "PLEASE?!" that's what that segue felt like

"you're jester, I'll allow it" that's it, that's the campaign

"we're making more of a difference than we ever would have if we hadn't met up"

beau: I'm technically included in everyone, that counts as a confession right

fjord what the fuck is that analogy

AND I WALK AWAY

jester gets such mom energy sometimes

man it's gonna suck when they have to fight the traveler and they used all their spell slots on pyro

mala: his master plan

the traveler is just megamind

PRESENTATION

that's a baller name

"had to get the wiggles out"

beat them dicks

cockquistador

v e t h

artagan's gonna end up choking out two of liam's characters

I'm suprisingly into the concept of caleb and artagan beefing over who makes jester look cooler

"our own personal use"

there is now no prize, you got punked, fuck off

I don't trust like that

"do an insight check" "for what" "idk I just hate her"

v e T H

"9021VO" marisha

"it's a southern-ass thing" ahh, my people

"a blue tiefling" "so jester" "...yeah, it's jester"

"their dicks in their hands" a hur dur dur dur

I'm so NERVOUS there's no way this goes well but WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN

we lost marisha

"the golden phallus" his dark materials porn parody

fuck the what

"I'm the final dick!"

COCKBLOCKED

celia's the new big bad

new oneshot, search for celia

what's gonna HAPPEN the energy is so WEIRD

moonweaver: heard u bitches was lookin for me

oh. well shit.

well SHIT

what happens to jester if artagan gets put in gay baby jail???

okay I went and did dishes so I wouldn't have to do them after the episode and my current working theory is that jester becomes artagan's parole officer

depending if laura wants to keep jester on that route, idk, she might tell him to go fuck himself

jester :(

shades of garmelie in that muffled panic

jester's like 6-0 for charming incredibly powerful creatures, let's go for 7

"jester. that's all." cries

the one good thing he ever did

(I knew he actually loved her)

(vindication corner over here tonight)

moonweaver: don't forget to like comment and subscribe

cad: I got a lotta arm

stop making jester make decisions, let her Rest

jester you adorable goof, they fucking love you

y'all are gonna make me actually look up the moon theory and I don't Want To

"are you okay tho" "................yeah?"

beau: press x to doubt

everyone in this campaign: I'm incredibly powerful. I'm an enormous fuckup. I'm at the combination incredibly powerful and enormous fuckup.

veth was seriously going to throw tiny hands, I love her

artagan just tell her you love her back

I will teleport in there and throw hands

I can't help it, I just like him. I always have. I blame Matt. every time they want him to fuck off they just start doing monologues

I mean goldmember's taken

"I'm at your service" fuckin weh

fjord: are you fucking with me. you have to tell me if you're fucking with me or it's entrapment

jester set some boundaries challenge

this did not turn out to be much of a vacation, to be ENTIRELY fair

"sidequest, who's got sidequests"

cad's their designated driver, he doesn't go home until they're all home

BEAUREBAR

"can we warn yussa" "I plan to!" "we always plan to, let's please do it this time"

"someone prayed for a miracle and there you were" cad that's gay

mala: sounds like Taliesin's home plane

[allhailthe70shousewife]

One ringy-dingy, two ringy-dingy.

[dream2bu]

One ringy-dingy, two ringy-dingy…

[nitallica]

My Little Fansites

One could say that I’ve had a digital burr in the proverbial saddle lately. I’ve been doing some long overdue maintenance on my domains, necessary software upgrades to all of the WordPress-related components and WHM backend. I even (finally) updated my install of Enthusiast and upgraded my fanlistings collective site to PHP7x.

This included updating the coding on all of my fansites, removing a LOT of older custom coding, some now-broken MySQL scripting, and even removing one fanlisting altogether because I really did not want to re-write the damned thing: Arieluma. I mean, let’s face it, I am likely never ever going back to Aion ever again; and at this point I am all too happy to just let that fansite die. I had already had an idea for a new one for ages, and took a bit of time to sit down and flesh it out this weekend: WebRings. (more ringy dingies!)

Of course it’s still pending approval by TFL staffers, but I got time. I have a LOT of tweaking left to do!

Thankfully the Enthusiast script is being updated by an active developer, so that’s good for me. Without her help, I was ready to just dump the whole thing within the next 6 months. But it’s funny, while researching alternatives, I ran across a rather creative solution — using WordPress. Guilliean Pacheco posted an article a little while back called “How to Use WordPress to Manage Your Fanlisting Collective.” It’s very simple and a great alternative to the quickly shrinking staple of fansite/collection scripts that are suffering quiet deaths due to lack of interest/resources/attention/whatever.

It actually gives me a couple of ideas totally not related to fanlistings at all, but that’s another post for another time if I can get a POC going. :)

I’ll likely spend the rest of tonight tweaking a few things here or there, or perhaps start building out the rest of my collective. I have ideas to be fleshed out, just finding time to code them without a migraine is the current bump in the road.

source https://www.nickifaulk.com/2020/08/30/my-little-fansites/