#one piece ch 4 - 6

[beaulesbian]

One Piece ch. 004 - 006 || ch. 485 (ep. 377)

What good is ambition if I can't even save the life of my own captain?

[infamous-light]

You Belong to Me Ch. 8

Alcina Dimitrescu x F! Reader

Ch. 1 Ch. 2 Ch. 3 Ch. 4 Ch. 5 Ch. 6 Ch. 7

AO3: You Belong to Me

Summary: Lady Dimitrescu's obsession knows no bounds as she becomes increasingly possessive over you. Will you succumb to her dark embrace, or find a way to break free before it's too late?

Word Count: 3.9K

Warnings: Yandere, possessive/obsessive behavior

Your mind raced as you absorbed the message.

Could this be your way out?

The thought spiraled through your mind, igniting a flicker of hope deep within your chest. It was a chance – a slim one, fraught with danger and uncertainty – but a chance, nonetheless.

You stole a glance at Lady Dimitrescu, her elegant figure poised at her vanity, commanding the space around her. She focused intently on her reflection, her fingers moving with the precision of an artist as she applied the cream to her face.

Your own fingers trembled as you folded the note with as much discretion as you could muster, slipping it into your pocket. You took a deep breath, attempting to steady the storm of nerves swirling within you. Suddenly, Lady Dimitrescu’s gaze shifted from her reflection and locked onto yours through the mirror. Her eyes were sharp and penetrating, cutting through the air like a blade.

“Is something troubling you, dear? Your heart seems rather restless.” She inquired; her voice smooth but laced with concern.

Your stomach clenched in response to her words, the fear you were desperately trying to suppress bubbling dangerously close to the surface. You searched frantically for a plausible excuse – anything that might sound convincing enough to satisfy her. You swallowed hard, the action feeling monumental, as you fought to steady your voice and calm the tumultuous beating of your heart.

“I don't feel well, my Lady.” You managed to say, your words wobbly as they spilled from your lips.

You could hear the tremor in your own voice, and you hoped she would attribute it to your alleged illness. Lady Dimitrescu frowned, her eyes narrowing further as she scrutinized you from head to toe.

“You were feeling fine just a moment ago.” She remarked, her voice low and suspicious.

The tension hung in the air like a dark cloud, oppressive and foreboding. She turned in her seat, pivoting to face you fully. The fabric of her bathrobe rustled softly as it rode up to reveal a tantalizing glimpse of her upper thighs. Her golden gaze, unnerving and intense, seemed to dissect you piece by piece, leaving you feeling raw and exposed. Your stomach churned violently, and for a moment, you thought you might actually get sick.

“I-I know. I thought I was,” you stammered, fighting to keep your composure. “But then a wave of nausea hit me, and I don’t really feel hungry anymore. The drug... it’s still affecting me.”

Fear gripped you so tightly at the thought of being caught with the hidden note that your hands began to shake. Before Lady Dimitrescu could open her mouth to respond, the plate slipped from your fingers, crashing to the floor in a shower of ceramic shards, scattering like the remnants of your fraying resolve. Lady Dimitrescu's eyes widened in surprise. The initial shock was quickly replaced by a simmering irritation that twisted her features into a dark scowl.

“I-I need to go to the bathroom. I think I'm going to be sick.” The words tumbled from your lips as panic surged within you.

With a sudden jolt, you sat up, your heart racing despite your weakened state. You forced yourself to move across the bedroom. The world around you twisted and blurred, dark shadows shifting into a disorienting backdrop that threatened to swallow you whole.

“Pet!”

Lady Dimitrescu's voice cut through the haze, a sharp command that made your skin prickle. The intensity of her gaze felt like a weight upon your back, yet you willed yourself to ignore her, pushing forward into the bathroom. You slumped against the cool porcelain of the sink, its unforgiving edge digging into your chest as you fought to draw in a single breath. Each inhalation felt like a struggle, your lungs constricted as panic took over, threatening to pull you under. You needed to escape this stifling place, to distance yourself from her.

Suddenly, a large shadow enveloped you.

“Pet,” Lady Dimitrescu said, her voice low and silky, as her hand reached out to cradle your jaw. The warmth of her palm contrasted sharply with the chill in the air, and you felt a shiver run down your spine. “Look at me.”

She gently but firmly forced you to meet her gaze, turning your body with a grip that left no room for defiance. Her eyes pierced into yours, demanding your undivided attention.

“What has gotten into you? You reek of fear.” Lady Dimitrescu said, her voice slow and deliberate.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

There was no way you could confess about the note or how the maid had helped you earlier. Your brain desperately wracked for something, anything, that might divert her suspicion. Perhaps honesty was the best approach – though not the truth she sought. You hoped against hope that it would work.

“That’s because I am scared,” you began, your voice quivering. “I’m scared of you, your daughters – of this whole place! Being drugged and forced to be your pet, it’s all too much! I just want to go home! I miss my family!”

Tears brimmed in your eyes as you spoke, and you silently prayed that she would buy your explanation. Deep down, you meant every word. The fear, the confusion – they were painfully real. For a fleeting moment, it seemed as though a flicker of hurt crossed Lady Dimitrescu’s face before she quickly masked it with her usual veneer of authority. 

“Such dramatics,” she said, annoyance threading her tone. “I understand that this transition is difficult for you, but you must embrace your new reality. In time, you will come to see that this is your home now. You belong to me, and you will adapt to this new life, whether you wish to or not.”

Relief washed over you, grateful that she had fallen for your half-truth. However, her words lingered, unsettling you. The notion of belonging to her, of being bound to this castle still made your skin crawl. She straightened up once more, releasing her grip on your jaw.

“Now, dry those tears and finish your breakfast,” she commanded, her voice carrying an edge of dismissal. “We don’t have all day.”

***

Currently, you sat across Lady Dimitrescu’s desk, your gaze fixed on a few documents laid out before you. The whole morning consisted of helping her go through her notes, meticulously analyzing every detail and ensuring nothing was overlooked. The task was mentally exhausting, each page filled with complex information that demanded your full attention.

As you shifted in your seat, trying to find a more comfortable position, Lady Dimitrescu's keen eye caught the movement. She paused her work, her eyes lingering on you for a moment before a small smile played on her lips.

“Perhaps we should take a break,” she suggested as she set her pen down. “I’ve had my fill of these reports. How about we pay a visit to the atelier?”

Your gaze snapped up in surprise. You had heard of the room during your first week here, but you’ve never stepped foot inside. Very few of the staff ever did. Her eyes locked onto yours, glimmering with a mischievous light that made your heart beat a little faster.

“The atelier?” You questioned; your curiosity piqued.

“Yes, I would like for you to see it,” Lady Dimitrescu continued. “The atelier is where I keep my more personal projects. I think you’ll find it quite... charming.” She rose from her chair with a fluid grace that seemed almost unnatural. “Come. There's much to show you, and I believe a change of scenery will do us both some good.”

***

You approached a heavy wooden door adorned with intricate carvings. As you drew closer, the elaborate designs came into sharper focus. The carvings depicted a lush, intertwining array of vines and flowers, each petal and leaf painstakingly carved with a level of skill that spoke of centuries-old craftsmanship.

You didn't have a chance to study it further as Lady Dimitrescu pushed the door open, the heavy wood moving effortlessly under her touch.

Inside, the atelier was a stunning contrast to the rest of the castle – a treasure trove of artistry and inspiration. The walls were lined with canvases draped in rich colors while some half-finished sketches were scattered about. A chandelier hung from the ceiling, its crystal pendants catching the light and casting a soft, golden glow that highlighted the finer details of all the artworks. And in the center, stood a large canvas, partially concealed by a heavy velvet drape.

“What do you think, pet?” Lady Dimitrescu said, her voice a low purr.

You stepped into the atelier; your senses overwhelmed by the vivid colors.

“It’s… beautiful.” You breathed, your eyes wide with wonder.

She hummed appreciatively. “Indeed. There is one piece in particular that is my favorite.” She gestured to that same large canvas in the middle. “Would you like to see it?”

You gave a brief nod. “Yes, my Lady.”

With a flourish, Lady Dimitrescu pulled back the drape, revealing a striking portrait of a woman – her features eerily reminiscent of your own. The painting captured every detail: the arch of the brows, the curve of the lips, the delicate contour of the cheekbones, but it was the eyes that held you captive. They sparkled with an otherworldly light, almost as if they were alive.

You could feel Lady Dimitrescu's gaze boring into you, scrutinizing every flicker of emotion that crossed your face. You swallowed hard, a chill creeping down your spine as you processed the painting.

“It looks… just like me.” You murmured, unable to tear your gaze away.

“Precisely.” Lady Dimitrescu said, stepping closer to you.

“Why?” You croaked, your voice sounding strained.

“There’s something about you that intrigues me,” she whispered. “Perhaps it’s fate that brought you to me.”

The corners of her lips curved upward, revealing a hint of her sharp, predatory teeth. The air grew heavy with tension, as if the very atmosphere around you had thickened.

“There’s so much more I want to share with you. So much more you could become.” Her voice was almost hypnotic, filled with promise and a hint of something darker.

Your stomach twisted, a knot of anxiety and unease forming deep within you. As the weight of her gaze came down on you, Lady Dimitrescu’s expression shifted, a playful smile breaking the intensity of the moment.

“But enough of my musings,” she said, her tone lightening. “What do you say we turn our attention to something a bit more hands-on? Would you like to try your hand at painting?”

The sudden change in topic made you do a double take. You blinked, the tension momentarily dissipating as you processed her unexpected suggestion.

“Me? Paint?” You echoed. “I’ve never really done it before.”

You looked up at Lady Dimitrescu, searching her face for any hint of mockery, but found only sincere encouragement.

“That’s fine,” she said, her smile widening. “It doesn’t require perfection; it requires passion.

She led you toward a blank canvas leaning against the right side of the wall, surrounded by a plethora of vibrant paints and clean brushes. You hesitated, glancing at the canvas and back to her.

“What should I paint?”

“Anything your heart desires,” she replied, stepping back to give you room. “Just let your instincts guide you.”

“Okay, I’ll give it a try.” You said uncertainly as you stepped forward.

You grabbed a paint brush off a nearby table, its weight feeling foreign in your hand. Next, you picked up a palette and a few tubes of acrylic paint. You squeezed out dabs of paint - vibrant reds, deep blues, and sunny yellows onto the palette. Slowly, you began to swirl them together with the brush, watching as they transformed into new hues – emerald greens and sunset oranges.

With a tentative stroke, you pressed the brush against the canvas, the bristles gliding smoothly across the surface. Each movement felt clumsy at first, but as you gained confidence, your strokes became more fluid and expressive. You layered colors, allowing them to blend and bleed into one another.

“Beautiful,” Lady Dimitrescu murmured, her gaze fixed on you as you worked. “You already have a natural sense of color. I can see the potential.”

Encouraged by her words, you started to create bold strokes, blending hues and allowing your emotions to flow onto the canvas. For the first time, you felt a sense of freedom.

Not long thereafter, you set the palette aside and stepped back to assess your work. Before you flowed a waterfall that tumbled down a rugged mountainside while the surrounding landscape was filled with lush green trees and rocky outcrops. While the colors weren't as smooth as you had hoped, and some areas lacked refined detail, the painting held a certain charm. It wasn't bad for your first attempt at painting.

“It’s remarkable, dear.” Lady Dimitrescu said, stepping closer to admire your work.

You blushed at her praise. “Thank you, my Lady. I didn’t know I could do something like this.”

“And that’s the beauty of discovering oneself. We often underestimate our own potential,” she stated matter of fact. “Now, I'd like to show you a technique that is helpful for beginners. It's called dry brushing. I'll demonstrate on a blank canvas so that you can observe closely.”

She reached over your head and picked up the palette you had just used. As she did so, the board ended up tilting slightly and some of the remaining paint dripped off the edge, landing on your vest. The sudden sensation of cold, wet paint soaking through the cloth made you flinch back.

“Oh my,” Lady Dimitrescu said in surprise, though there was a small, knowing smile on her lips, as if she found the situation both charming and entertaining. “I do apologize, darling. It seems I’ve turned you into a canvas of sorts.”

You lifted the bottom of your vest in a futile attempt to keep the paint from running further down the fabric. Her gaze followed your movements, and she reached out, her fingers brushing lightly against the paint-stained spot.

She let out a soft sigh. “Go wipe the excess paint off, pet, and leave the vest in the laundry basket. Return here once you’ve finished.”

“Yes, my Lady.” Your voice came out more awkwardly than you intended.

You turned to leave but not before your eyes were drawn back to the portrait of yourself. The uncanny precision of the details, the intensity of the gaze staring back at you. It unsettled you in a way you couldn't quite explain.

As you finally exited the room, you couldn’t help but wonder why Lady Dimitrescu had chosen this moment to show you the atelier. To show the painting of you.

What was her intention?

As you made your way to the Lady’s bedchambers, you paused, glancing down the hallway where her daughters' bedchambers were. The corridor stretched out before you, silent and shadowed. Nobody was around. The note in your pocket burned, reminding you of the main house key that was supposedly in Bela’s bedroom.

Your heart began to race as you debated snooping around in her bedroom. You didn't know where the Lady's daughters were, and the thought of running into one of them made your palms sweaty. Bela was known for her strict adherence to her duties, often seen patrolling the castle and overseeing the staff. Cassandra spent most of her time in either the armory or the cellar. And Daniela typically lingered in the library, absorbed in her books. You prayed that today they would follow their usual routines.

This might be your only chance to search for the key. It was a risk you had to take.

You pivoted on your heel and made your way down the hallway. The silence was almost deafening, each of your footsteps echoing against the carpeted floor. After a few more steps, you came upon Bela’s bedroom door. A small red gem rested in the center, which gleamed in the low light like a drop of blood. It matched the one on her necklace that she always wore.

You looked both ways one more time.

Nothing.

The hallway was empty. You slowly opened the door, the hinges creaking slightly, and slipped inside. The door clicked shut behind you. Bela’s bedroom was tidy and dark, the only light coming from a few scattered candles and the low flickering embers from the fireplace. Near the back was a large bed, pushed against the furthest wall, its canopy draped with rich, heavy curtains. A nightstand stood next to the bed, a single candle flickering on its surface. To the right was the fireplace and next to it was a desk, neatly arranged with papers and books, presumably placed there to keep Bela warm as she worked. On the left side of the bedroom was the vanity.

Where could the key be?

Logically, it would make sense to check her desk first. Taking a deep breath to steady yourself, you approached the desk, your fingers shaking slightly as you reached for the first drawer. It slid open, revealing a stack of neatly organized documents. You began to rifle through them, the papers rustling underneath your touch. Letters, schedules, and reports passed through your hands, but unfortunately, the key wasn’t there. You looked on top of her desk and moved some folders and books around, hoping the key might be hidden in plain sight, but it yielded nothing as well.

You walked over to her vanity and opened each drawer as well. Bottles clinked together, brushes rolled aside, but there was still no sign of the main house key.

A cold sweat broke out on your forehead and your hands began to feel clammy. You wiped them on your pants, feeling the fabric cling to your palms.

You needed to hurry.

You turned around and walked over to the nightstand. You opened the top drawer and moved some papers and personal objects aside. Your fingers brushed against the edges of journals, loose sheets of parchment, and small trinkets as you sifted through the contents.

Then, your eyes widened.

The key.

It lay nestled beneath a stack of old letters. For a moment, you simply stared at it, hardly daring to believe your luck. Then, with a swift motion, you quickly grabbed it and stuffed it in your pocket. You made sure to close the drawer before you made your way to the door. You cautiously opened it and peeked your head out. The hallway beyond was dim and deserted. Your breath came a little easier as you stepped out. You closed the door quietly, the latch clicking into place with a soft sound that seemed louder than it was.

You couldn’t believe it. You had the key!

Your heart raced with a mixture of excitement and trepidation. This was your chance to escape, to reclaim your life from Lady Dimitrescu and her daughters.

You picked up the pace as you made your way down the hallway, heart pounding violently inside of your chest. Before you could turn the corner, Catalina's face flashed across your mind for a split second, halting your steps mid-stride. The image of her warm smile and kind eyes filled your thoughts, bringing an unexpected pang of guilt. You wanted to say goodbye to her, to thank her for the help she provided in this nightmare. The thought of leaving Catalina without saying a word felt wrong, but you knew that time was not on your side. In the end, she would understand. She would want you to leave.

As you stood there, lost in thought, a distant scream sliced through the air, chilling your blood. It was followed by an eerie giggle. Possibly Daniela by the sound of it.

You knew you couldn't linger any longer.

You had to leave.

Now.

As you descended the staircase, you caught sight of a maid, her back turned to you as she dusted one of the heavy-looking vases. You hesitated for a moment. You couldn’t take the risk of her spotting you; if she did, it would surely spell disaster for both of you. She would have no choice but to alert Lady Dimitrescu and her daughters if she didn’t want to lose her life. Plus, you didn’t want to think about what the Lady would to do you if you did end up getting caught.

You continued down the steps slowly, your heart racing as you maneuvered through the foyer. You stayed close to the shadows, glancing nervously at doorways and corners, half-expecting one of the Lady’s daughters to pop out at any moment.

Finally, you reached the main door.

Your heart was pounding so hard it felt as if it might burst from your chest. You pulled the key from your pocket and inserted it into the slot with trembling hands, praying that it wouldn't make too much noise. The mechanism clicked, and you held your breath, waiting for any sign that you had been detected. You strained to listen, your senses on high alert, but the castle remained fairly silent. You pushed the door open with ease, and a rush of cool, fresh air hit your face. The sensation was almost overwhelming. You stepped out and shut the door behind you as quietly as you could. The final barrier between you and the horrors of Castle Dimitrescu was sealed away with a soft thud.

You let out a ragged breath, feeling the oppressive weight lift off your shoulders. The tension that had coiled tightly within you began to unwind, like a spring slowly being released. You could almost sob in relief, the overwhelming urge to break down right there nearly consuming you. But you knew that there was no time for that. You still needed to get away from here, to put as much distance between yourself and the castle as much as possible. Turning away from the main door, you sprinted across the courtyard, adrenaline overriding the lingering effects of the drug. Your breath came out in short, rapid bursts, your lungs burning with the effort, but you didn't slow down. You had to get away, you had to reach safety.

The chill in the air was sharp, nipping at your exposed skin and seeping through your clothing. It pierced through your layers, making every breath feel crisp and biting, but it was a minor inconvenience compared to what you had endured recently. Snow covered the landscape, its pristine blanket stretching as far as the eye could see, making each step a struggle. Yet, the sun's warm rays managed to break through the overcast sky, melting some patches away and revealing damp, slushy areas that squished underfoot. It reminded you that even in the harshest of winters, warmth could still break through.

Eventually, the winding path ahead twisted through dense woods, shrouded in shadows and thick underbrush that seemed to close in around you. A sense of trepidation settled in your chest, memories of local tales about the woods resurfacing in your mind. You had heard of Lycans roaming the outskirts of the forest, their howls often echoing in the distance during the night. Yet, for some reason, they mainly avoided the villages. It was as if an unseen force forbade them from coming too close, a mysterious boundary they dared not to cross. Regardless, it didn’t ease your fears.

As you pushed forward, several branches scratched at your arms and face, their jagged edges catching on to your clothing and drawing minor scrapes that stung in the cold air. But you hardly noticed the pain; your focus was fixed on the path ahead, each step taking you closer to home.

You couldn’t wait to be reunited with your parents again.

[talesofesther]

𝐋𝐨𝐤𝐢 | 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

What once was mine

ch 1 | ch 2 | ch 3 | ch 4 | ch 5 | ch 6 | ch 7 | ch 8

When watching what once was supposed to be the rest of his life, in an empty room in the TVA, Loki sees someone he can’t recognize; a girl who’s all tenderness and loose smiles, and most importantly, she was smiling at him.

Make it taste like love

You felt him before you even met him. And despite the pain he carried around, his soul was one of the most beautiful you’d ever seen.

Tangle me in all your broken pieces (and watch me stay)

ch 1 | ch 2 | ch 3

An Asgardian god has just threatened your planet and you were called in to provide a little help. What you didn’t expect was to develop a strange soft spot for said god, who hid more pain behind his cold facade than you thought possible.

Too close to the stars

Somehow, between your overwhelming sweetness and insistence on treating him as if he was someone worth saving, you had managed to sneak your way into Loki’s cold heart. He simply hadn’t managed the guts to tell you, but a bit of a Christmas spirit might just change that.

[exhaslo]

Puzzle Pieces Ch. 6

(Mafia!Miguel x Shy!Reader)

Ch.1, Ch.2, Ch.3, Ch.4, Ch.5

Warning: Eventual Smut so Minors DNI, mentions of abuse, blood, murder, language, fluff, bullying, mentions of sex

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

There was just a small ray of sunshine threatening to poke through your curtains. Wincing at the light, you whimpered as you started to wake up. Fluttering your eyes open, you slowly tried to adjust to the room's lighting. It took you a moment to realize that you weren't in your room, but still in the living room.

"Hm?"

Slowly sitting up, you rubbed your eyes, bobbing your head as you woke up. Feeling something poke against your panties, you looked down and immediately grew flustered. Miguel was sleeping on the couch, which meant that you slept on top of him all night.

Covering your face with your sleeves, you shyly looked down to see what was poking you. A squeak nearly escaped your throat as you quickly got up. Feeling something over your shoulders, you gripped onto Miguel's jacket and proceeded to cover your face with it. Shyly, you glanced towards Miguel's erection,

"Hm...."

You were debating on waking him, but he looked so relaxed. Still holding onto his jacket, you quickly went to get Miguel your pillow and blanket, wanting him to be more comfortable. Once fixing him, you quickly went to wash up and prepare breakfast.

Once washed up, you glanced at yourself in the mirror, trying to cover your flustered cheeks. Miguel actually stayed over the night. The two of you actually kissed. Pressing his jacket towards your lips, you couldn't help but smile.

Putting his jacket on, you giggle towards how big it was on you. It felt nice and cozy. Eddie never let you wear his stuff. Flinching at the thought, you shook the memories away and hurried to the kitchen. Miguel was a big man, he must eat a heavy breakfast. Hopefully, he will like your cooking.

---------

Miguel grunted softly as he slowly started to come to. He winced towards the light, hissing very quietly as he covered his face. With a heavy inhale, Miguel shot up, wondering why he was smelling food. Immediately, he recalled knocking out at your place.

Miguel sighed quietly as he spotted you making breakfast in your small kitchen. A smile against his lips as you wore his jacket. Miguel wasn't going to say anything about the horrid smell of bacon soaking into the jacket. No. He wasn't going to say anything because of how good you looked wearing his clothes.

He licked his lips, remembering how you tasted last night. Moving your blanket off him, Miguel tensed at his large erection. Did you happen to see it? Glancing towards you again, Miguel knew that if he were to masturbate here, it would not be quietly.

"Hm~ Hm~ Bacon and eggs~ Mhm~ Bacon and Eggs," You chuckled, singing quietly to yourself.

"Can I assume bacon and eggs are on the menu?" Miguel asked, watching you jump.

"M-Miguel! M-Morning! H-How...How did you sleep?" You asked him, quickly lowering the heat and hurrying to him. Once you were close enough, Miguel stole a quick kiss,

"Honestly, better than most nights," He told you, watching your cheeks turn bright red, "How did my little bunny sleep?"

"A-Ah...G-Good...S-Sorry if I'm heavy."

"Ha, heavy?" Miguel stroked your cheek, enjoying you nuzzle your head into his palm, "Nothing of the sort."

"Mhm~" You hummed happily, "Um...I have s-some spare bathroom amenities if you want to w-wash up...I...I uh, don't have any clothes for you...if...if you like morning s-showers." You stuttered, playing with his jacket sleeves.

"I'll just wash my face, thank you."

Miguel stole one more kiss from you before heading to the bathroom. He needed to take care of his little problem down there. Miguel let out a heavy sigh as he sat on the toilet seat and grabbed his cock in his hands. Just having you sit on his lap last night was such a turn on.

Miguel grunted lowly as he stroked faster. He couldn't believe what you were doing to him. Normally Miguel would never break like this whenever he fucked a woman. It was always just a quick relief, but you. Oh, you were tormenting him.

"Fuck...(Y/N)..." Miguel groaned, hoping that the running water was loud enough to cover his lewd noises.

"B-Breakfast is r-ready, Miguel!" You called out.

His name rolled off your lips so nicely. All you had to do was cry it out as Miguel stuffed your pussy with his dick. To have you putty in the palm of his hands.

"(Y/N)," Miguel groaned, cumming against his hand.

Taking a moment to catch his breathe, Miguel proceeded to clean up the mess he made. This was what you were doing to him. You were making the biggest and baddest mafia leader cum in your bathroom. You were breaking Miguel down.

---------

"Um...I-I wasn't sure how much you liked to eat...S-So...I hope this is a big enough...portion." You said, placing the plate in front of him, "I-I hope you like it."

Miguel didn't have the heart to tell you that he never truly ate a home cooked meal before. This would be the first in a very long time he had a meal in the comfort of a home. Also, you gave him quite a big portion. Miguel resisted a chuckle at your adorable attempt. You were already doing a good job as his future wife.

"Sit and eat with me." Miguel told you. You nodded, grabbing your small plate and sitting across from him at your small table, "Is that enough to fill you?"

"O-Oh, yes. Y-You know I don't eat much,"

"Hm," Miguel kept eye contact with you before you both started to eat, "You look good in my jacket. Keep it."

"O-OH! S-Sorry! I-It was just...so cozy...A-Are you sure?"

"That jacket will just be the first of many clothes of mine you'll wear," Miguel muttered lowly, watching you smile into the jacket sleeves, "Yes, amor (love)."

"Oh, um, I-I've been m-meaning to ask. W-What does...amor mean? A-And that other w-word you c-call me sometimes...con...conjeta?" You did your best to repeat. Miguel chuckled lowly,

"They're just my little nicknames for you. Nothing bad," He hummed, taking a bite of his food, "You're good at cooking."

"Oh, um...T-Thank you." You nibbled on your toast, glancing towards Miguel, "Um, about last night...W-Why were you asking me all of that stuff about...the mafia?"

Miguel avoided your gaze, knowing that he would cave. He had decided to hold off on telling you about that part of his life. Miguel wanted to take care of you first. He wanted to make sure that you were willing to stay with him no matter what.

"Yesterday at Central Park. It was a mafia attack, I wanted to make sure that you were okay. This city if filled with different mafia gangs. I'm sure you weren't aware of that when you arrived in this city."

"Oh...no...."

"I had a feeling." Miguel stood from his seat, taking his empty plate to the sink. You quickly followed, taking the plate from him, "What are you doing tomorrow night?"

"Hm? Oh, um...T-This will be my...first Halloween here...S-So I'm not sure," You admitted while doing the dishes.

Miguel stood behind you, watching you hesitantly roll your sleeves up. He furrowed his brows, seeing small cuts on your wrists. Inhaling deeply, Miguel looked away immediately. As much as he wanted to be angry, something else was boiling inside Miguel instead.

"I'll pick you up after work tomorrow. It's too dangerous to be alone here." His voice got lower as he started to walk towards the door.

You gasped, quickly finishing up and drying your hands. Rushing towards Miguel as he approached the door, you gripped his shirt slightly. Miguel slowly turned towards you, pity in his eyes. You frowned at the sight before hugging him,

"E-Even though...we got interrupted...I-I was really h-happy with our date y-yesterday!"

Miguel hung his shoulders before turning around to engulf you in his embrace. He lifted your chin slightly, giving you another deep kiss. He resisted a smile as he felt you go on your tippy toes to try and gain from height on him. You were too cute.

"Until tomorrow, mi amor (my love)."

"Mhpm~"

----------

The crimson sunset coated the city beautifully. It looked even better with a glass of vodka in Miguel's hand as he sat on the roof of his penthouse. A cold breeze blowing against his hair, distracting Miguel of all his frustrations.

After leaving your place, Miguel couldn't get the image of those scars out of his mind. Not even Alchemax nor his mafia business could erase those vivid images.

"(Y/N)," Miguel whispered your name ever so gently.

Someone as innocent as you should have never thought of such a thing. This emotion Miguel was feeling was sorrow. Never had he'd encounter such a thing close hand. Miguel found it strange. He could easily kill someone or stand before a dead body...

But the thought of you being one of them?

Sipping his liquor, Miguel kept repeating the image of you rolling your sleeves hesitantly. Something that you desperately wanted to hide. You were scared. Miguel didn't want you to be scared. He wanted to understand.

And the kill the fucker who hurt you.

"Lyla, I have a mission. I need that brat Miles on this case." Miguel spat as he took out his phone.

'Sure thing boss. Where shall I send him?'

"(Y/N)'s hometown. I need to know who her ex was and what exactly happened between those two."

"Ohhhhh~ You're serious about her~" Lyla giggled over the phone, "Does this mean I can finally kick out all those greedy sluts who keep knocking at the office?"

"I thought I already told you to do that?" Miguel shook his head slightly, "Actually, do whatever. I just need that information."

"Yes sir,"

Hanging up on his assistant, Miguel let out a heavy sigh. The stress of everything was getting to him, plus the holidays were around the corner. Miguel needed to relieve his stress, but he was waiting for you. He refused to see any other women if he was going to make you his wife.

"(Y/N),"

----------

You hummed quietly as you worked on another puzzle. The thought of yesterday still lingering in your mind. Miguel's treatment towards you and the kiss. He was such a great boyfriend. You were just worried if you were being a good girlfriend.

That was always your worry.

Clenching the puzzle piece in your hand, you tried to calm down and forget the past. Nothing you ever did was good enough. You were never a good girlfriend. Shaking as tears rolled down your cheeks, you rushed into your bedroom and engulfed yourself in Miguel's jacket.

The warmth, the coziness and most of all, his scent was still there. Wrapping yourself in his jacket started to calm you down. Slowly returning to your puzzle with Miguel's jacket on, you tried to go back to your mental safe space.

Miguel wouldn't be this nice to you if you weren't being a good girlfriend, right? Looking at your bookshelf full of puzzles, you wondered if Miguel would like to do one with you? Perhaps tomorrow, you could bring one along with your cookies you forgot to give him.

"Maybe...I should ask him?" You muttered, looking for your phone.

Once found, you first texted Miguel asking if it was okay to call him. You didn't want to be a burden after all. Within a second, Miguel was the one to call you.

"H-Hey!"

"Are you alright?" Miguel asked. You smiled into your sleeve,

"Y-Yeah, I just wanted to ask you...what we were doing tomorrow night? If...If it's alright...for me....to bring something."

"Oh, I should have explained better, sorry mi amor. The city is pretty dangerous on Halloween. I want you to stay over at my place so I can keep you safe. Bring whatever you need to feel comfortable."

"S-So a puzzle?!" You chirped, not even registering the part where you were staying over at his place.

Miguel chuckled over the phone, "As many puzzles as you want." He hummed.

You cheered quietly, "I can't w-wait! Goodnight, Miguel~"

"Goodnight, (Y/N)"

Once you hung up, you quickly went to your wall of puzzles, wondering which one Miguel would like. After deciding on a few, you finally registered what Miguel said. Your face turned bright red as you dropped the box on the floor,

"I-I'm s-staying over....at....at M-Miguel's?!"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

next chapter

@migueloharacumslut @18lkpeters @deputy-videogamer @leahnicole1219 @synamonthy @thedevax @jolynesposts @thraetor @freehentai @2099hitmylineyline @vvampir3s @dontfollowmepleaseitsannoying @secretadmirerisnowonline @jadeloverxd @bunnibitez @oharasfilipinawife @randomgoosegame @lilbanas @daisy-artfield @axi-moore @mimiemie @darkfairy102190 @jazzyj1011 @mcmiracles @innercreationflower @spoderssimp @thel0velykey190 @moonvoidpng @yougavemeyourheartyouknow @scaleniusrm @love4saturn @nyxgoddessofchaos13 @slutty-chronicles @ghstypaint @migueloharastruelove @brainmatterdump @a060403 @trendyharold @yannauauau @kimivixen @angel-xx-1 @nxrdamp @miguelzslvtz @lynxslokley @wafflefries786 @pochapo @what-the-jams @flaps200 @ii-angelsrolltheireyes-ii @nakimushiohime @tojishugetiddies @aya-world @supercowgirl04 @mysteris-things

[lot-of-nothing]

Entwined (Ch. 8)

Melissa Schemmenti x Reader

Weekend getaway (the r rated stuff) :)

Warnings: SMUT and FLUFF

Author's Note: WHEN I TELL YOU TO LISTEN TO 'NAKED IN MANHATTAN' BY CHAPPELL ROAN ON REPEAT WHEN YOU READ THE SMUT, I AM SO DEADASS SERIOUS. It will convey the exact level of passion and excitement that is happening.

Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch. 6 | Ch. 7

Before the elevator doors could close behind you, Melissa’s hand was clutching yours as she set off towards your hotel room. Her confidence and determination reminded you of a hot summer night during your twenties when you walked her home from a party - as soon as you approached her apartment, her hand was in yours, but her mind already between the sheets of her bed. 

“You aren’t too busy to stay tonight, are you?” Melissa cooed as she stopped in her tracks outside of her apartment door. She gave your hand a strong tug which sent your tipsy body stumbling into hers - your hands gripping her sides to steady yourself.

Her statement was obviously rhetorical when she attached her lips to yours. One arm wound around your neck while the other slithered up your chest to hold your chin - both effectively holding you in place. Not that you wanted to go anywhere anyways. 

As of a week ago, she and Joe were on a break (again), and suddenly you were both attached at the hips once again. Her hands had been wandering for days - slowly testing the waters to see how far she could get with you. And each time Mel’s skin brushed against your own, you felt electricity crackling across your body. 

Melissa still hadn’t lost her touch. Her hands had found their way under your shirt, thumbs stroking your skin, sending those same jolts across your body once more. You were losing yourself in the moment. Her hands felt everywhere all at once. You could have sworn that her pink lipstick covered your face. Each touch made you feel intoxicated. 

You found yourself fading into past memories when you heard her breathless, gruff voice in your ear. And suddenly you were 16 again.

“I need you.” The redhead whispered as she pressed you against her bedroom door. 

You had picked her up from her boyfriend’s house at one in the morning. She had snuck out to see him, but when her sexual escapades resulted in disappointing results, she called pleading with you to rescue her.

“I-” Your brows furrowed, head bowed, and hands clutched her sides. How could you tell her that you had no clue what to do with all of her bottled up desire? It felt like she expected the world from you, but your inexperience made you freeze up like a deer in headlights.

Her mother, sisters, and brothers were home. You couldn’t have the devout Catholic Ms. Schemmenti see you being more than friendly with her daughter, but Melissa’s canine teeth gently sinking into the side of your neck made your worries start to fade. 

She tempted you once more, “Come on, baby.”

With unexpected expertise, Melissa fished her hotel key from her pocket and pressed it to the sensor on the door. Your heart leapt when you heard her giggle as she fumbled with the door handle. Overwhelmed by your desire for her, you forced your lips to hers once more and backed her into the hotel room, letting the door slam behind you. 

It was blurry as you both approached the bed. Dominance would shift back and forth as you pressed one another to the walls and tore at each other's clothes. She had come away as the winner when she pushed you back onto the bed. 

Melissa’s gaze was hungry as she stared down at you. Her hands undid her jeans, and you loved the way her jaw shifted when she was met with the slight challenge of sliding her jeans over her wide hips. She slowly stripped before you, taking off each piece of clothing without breaking her eye contact. 

“Take a picture. It lasts longer.”

“Don’t tempt me.” Your response had been so quick that Melissa wasn’t expecting such forwardness. She always loved teasing you about your tendency to admire her, but often you would just look away with a red face. 

The redhead was comfortable changing in front of you, but would usually turn away from you when she removed her bra - always preserving some assemblance of privacy. This time, however, she remained facing you, staring you down as she revealed her chest to you. In the past, you had always had the decency to stare down into your lap, but now you soaked up the sight. 

She took a few steps closer, and time stopped. She was towering over you as you sat on the edge of her bed, her breasts were at eye level. Her hand caught the back of your neck, causing you to stall in place. You couldn’t believe the momentum of her hand was pulling you towards her enchanting body. 

“Well, don’t be shy now.”

Shaken from lingering in your memories, you caught her nipple between your lips, settling into the comforting position of our hands and mouth on her tits and her knees on either side of your lap. Her fingers scratched your scalp and played with your hair as small hums of satisfaction emanated from her body. 

When you detached your lips and looked up to meet her eyes, Melissa’s intensity wavered for a moment. A soft smile graced her lips and she cocked her head, “You always look beautiful like this.”

You had no words for her. You only wanted to make her feel good. 

With strong hands gripping her thighs, you lifted her momentarily to exchange places with her on the bed. And rather than loom over her for the same body worship, you sank to your knees, taking your rightful place between her legs. 

“This always feels so right...”

Of course it does. You knew this, but after years apart, you were happy to remind her (or prove to her) how well you knew every square inch of her. It was so satisfying to hear each one of her vocalizations, each more unrestrained than the last as she lost control over herself. 

Maybe it was pure ego, but you always told yourself that you were the only one that could do this to her. That could bring out this part of her. Why else would she keep coming back for more?

With the pure motivation of proving yourself to be Melissa’s most competent lover, you probed her cunt more thoroughly and savored her flavor as she grew wetter. 

“I have to feel you against me.” Mel’s hands on your cheeks and growl drew you from continuing to swim through the memory any longer. 

While you weren’t sure what she had in mind, you were directed by the impatient and aggressive woman sharing the bed. Her hands desperately tugged at any remaining clothes, causing you to nervously fumble around as you stripped. 

When you were finally naked, she had you with your back against the bed and her manicured nails teasing your cunt, testing your wetness only to find you soaked. Reliving the past while also being in the present with Melissa had you feeling frenzied for her touch, and you let her know as such when you muttered ‘please’ over and over. 

“I will, baby.” Her voice was breathy and your clit throbbed at hearing the pet name. You knew you were weak for Melissa Schemmenti, but now you felt like absolute putty in her hands, ready to do what she requested at any second. 

You were disappointed when she momentarily moved away. It was impossible for you to contain your groan when your cunt made contact with hers as you weren’t expecting the coolness of her sopping heat against you. 

Instinct took over you both as you gripped one another's hips and thighs, attempting to draw the other closer for increasingly satisfying sensations as you grind your cunts together. When her mouth found yours, it felt as though she was trying to swallow you whole with each open mouthed kiss and swipe of her tongue. From the way she held and kissed you, it was hard to contend which one of you was the most desperate for the other’s touch.

Melissa was turned around and completely lost in the humping, grinding, and swirl of limbs. Her thoughts were so overrun by her body chasing down the orgasm she craved, the filter for her thoughts had completely shut down.

“I love you,” she breathed, hand squeezing at the back of your neck, “I never want... you... you to think otherwise.”

You lost track of the night from there, completely blinded by her admission.

Hours later you would still have her sprawled out on her back, chest heaving with each tantalizing thrust of your hips. You had her repeat those first three words over and over, breathing them in as if you needed them to live. While you couldn’t force the same words from your mouth, you hoped each of your kisses and movements could reflect the love you held for her until you were ready to return the sentiment. 

--

It had been disappointing to wake up to an empty bed, but the photo of Melissa in a black bikini waiting for you in your texts had you throwing on your bathing suit to make your way to her by the pool before you had truly shaken the sleep from your body. It was easy to push the thought of not admitting your feelings from your head. You knew you loved her, but hearing her say it was far better than anything you had experienced in years. For now, it was easier to focus on that than your own shortcomings in vulnerability.

When you found her by the poolside, Melissa patted the spot between her legs, and while the innuendo would typically make you blush, her tone and eyes only conveyed an innocent sweetness. “I didn’t have the heart to wake you, but I saved you a seat.” 

“Thank you?” With a bit of nervous skepticism for the unusual docility from Melissa, you crawl onto the round cushioned pool chair and shiver at the feeling of her hands immediately finding your shoulders. 

“I can help with your sunscreen.” She offers with a forceful execution as she is already applying sunscreen to her hands before you have an opportunity to accept the offer. Mel’s hands work the lotion into your screen, lingering on your shoulders and biceps as she speaks casually, “The UVs are already high so I’m gonna read for a bit to tan. You can lay here with me or whatever.” 

You shrug and nod, not wanting to seem too overzealous at the prospect of publicly being seen together. “Yeah, sure.” 

Your heart was thudding in your chest when she patted your back and said ‘good to go’. There were no examples of public displays of affection between Melissa and you for you to base this interaction off of. Cautiously, you slide down enough to recline back into Mel’s lap. 

Rather than confirming your anxious worries of rejection, Melissa shifted to having your head resting on her thigh while she drew up her other knee to rest her book onto. While she wasn’t turning pages in her book, her fingers brushed against your cheeks and forehead or twirled locks of your hair. 

Her thoughts must have been wandering elsewhere as she spoke up suddenly, breaking the longstanding, comfortable silence between you, “When we get back, you should meet Barb. You could even come to a family dinner if you wanna.”

Taglist: @esposadejoyhuerta, @unicorniusfallapatorius, @sapphicxrat, @earpivore, @jeridandridge @petty-femme27, @darkcolorphantom, @a-queen-and-her-throne, @cosmichymns, @ara-a-bird

[anki-of-beleriand]

A Heart Made of Glass ch. 17

Summary: Ten years ago you left Wanda and the Avengers to heal your broken heart. You never stopped being a hero, just as you never stopped being in love with her. But life had to go on.

Now, after all that time, she is back and with her is a young woman needing help and an enemy that may not be as afraid as Wanda to lay a claim on you.

Pairings: Wanda Maximoff x Powered!F!Reader - Scarlet Witch x PoweredF!Reader - Past Wanda Maximoff x Vision - CarolxF!Reader

Warnings: Angst, drama, mentions of cheating, fluff, violence, Switch!Reader, internalize homophobia, hurt, comfort, Wanda being a complete mess, anger management issues, jealousy, Requited/Unrequited love, idiots in love, swearing, mentions of alcohol. More tags as the story progess.

Author's Note: This story is a continuation of Dirty Little Secret I was really surprised at the response I got for the story. Thank you for the support.

This is the story of their lives, as it was supposed to be. Sometimes our story is not what we wanted it to be but what we needed it to be.

Please, do remember English is no my mother tongue so forgive my grammar, spelling and funny mistakes.

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9 - Chapter 10 - Chapter 11 Chapter 12 - Chapter 13 - Chapter 14 - Chapter 15 - Chapter 16 - Chapter 17 - Epilogue

Chapter 17

The way it was supposed to be

Autumn was a strange experience in this part of the world. It was not too cold, but it brought with it heavy rain and windy afternoons that usually turned into lukewarm nights.

You had come to appreciate life for what it was: the passing of time and the golden experiences and memories you built with loved ones. After you had left the Avengers, you had faced a world that was submerged in a darkness that was not compatible with yours. You experienced firsthand the awful requests made by the common citizen, the envy and the everlasting hatred some of them held in their hearts. Natasha had always said you were far too noble, that your heart was far too loving to actually comprehend or even be a part of a job that could destroy that piece of innocence you still held closer to your soul.

You didn't believe her, though. 

You remember the anger, you remember the resentment, and you remember the pain. At some point, you thought darkness was all you should experience, everything you were capable of. The missions you had taken became the outlet of your anger and frustration, and it wasn't until you saw your reflection after a nasty confrontation with some mercenaries that you were confronted with the person you were changing into. You were walking down a road that could pretty well transformed you into a villain, it took time and tears and so much frustration but, by the time you crossed paths with Wanda you had put to rest your resentment and hatred against what had happened. 

The morning breeze sneaked inside the room, the curtains shifted slightly letting you see the heavy clouds gliding above the villa. You shifted your weight, turning to look at the sleeping form on the right side of the bed.

Wanda had her eyes closed, with the lines around her eyes completely relaxed and her lips slightly parted. Her hair was fanned over the pillow and her hand had been resting on your hip protectively. At some point during the night the both of you had moved through the bed, and Wnda had found herself snuggling closer to you while giving you space so as to not hurt your leg. 

It never occurred to you that another encounter with Wanda would result in the both of you starting something else. At some point in time, you always thought you would tell Wanda everything that you had been through emotionally and that after that, you would let her go. Now years later, and after a very tiresome mission, you couldn’t help but feel as your heart melted at the sight of the other woman sharing your bed.

You never stopped loving her.

Turning on your side, you held back an exclamation of pain while lifting your free hand. Your fingertips mapped out the features of Wanda’s face brushing on the skin on her jaw down her neck to the arm that was still holding onto you. Your lips broke into a smile, your heart beating without a control inside your chest and a little voice inside your head just begged to the woman still fast asleep to not break your heart.

Not again.

With a sigh, you leaned in placing a single kiss on her lips before sitting up. Your leg was hurting a little, but it wasn’t nothing that you couldn’t control, so with the help of your shadows you stood up hopping to the crutch that was resting on the bedside table. 

With a last glance to the sleeping form of Wanda you closed the door behind yourself and decided to go to the kitchen. The noise of conversation and kitchen utensils being pushed around told you were in for an interesting morning conversation.

___________________________________

Natasha was ignoring the bickering between America and Yelena, she had her eyes firmly planted on the paper she brought that morning but the smirk playing on her lips told you she had not kissed a single word. 

At times, you wondered how people found family in the most unexpected places with the most unexpected people. You had always been grateful with Natasha, she had made it her duty to share with you what she longed for. With a smile you took another step closer to the older woman knowing the skidding of the leg in the floor was something you couldn't hide at the moment. 

You knew the older woman had heard you approaching, though her posture ever changed the muscles on her back tensed. You sat down on a chair looking over at the paper before grabbing the mug Natasha had in front of her. 

“That's mine.” She stated never looking away from the news, you shrugged taking a long sip of coffee. 

“Was.” You nodded to the paper, “what is it?”

“Nothing much, they had been ignoring the incident so far.” Natasha put the paper down, turning her attention to you. “How are you feeling?”

You winced placing a hand on the table, “I've been better, no gonna lie. The pain this morning is not that bearable.”

“Must be you sudden outing yesterday, you forced yourself more than you should.” Natasha pushed her lips, her green eyes gleaming dangerously. “Where is Wanda?”

“In my room.”

Natasha gave a brief nod, her hand sought out yours grasping it tightly. You glanced at the table just before lifting your eyes to meet hers. In there you found a softening stare, the glimpses of a smile and understanding of the situation. It was more than enough for you. 

“How are things with her?” The question rolled out of her lips though you were pretty sure she wanted to say something else. 

Shifting on your spot, you lifted your face to see out of the window where America and Yelena had finally come to a silent agreement while going through the training routine. 

“They are fine, I guess.” You chuckled when Natasha huffed, tilting your head you continued. “Sometimes it is hard to just leave the past behind, but then when I'm with her I remember the innocence of my feelings for her back then and how different they are now.”

“Love is for children.”

“Indeed.” You mirrored the smile Natasha was giving you. “I think I never stop caring, and I never stop feeling. It is different now we are learning and getting to know one another.”

Natasha gave a curt nod, she squeezed your hand once more. Her face hardened for a moment, crunching her nose as in deep in thought. 

“She is recovering, you know? Strange has been telling us how much she had changed, how happy she has been as of late.” Natasha leaned back dropping her shoulders. “Wanda had gone through so much, I don't think she should go back to this life. And quite frankly, I don't think you should either.”

This was a conversation the both of you had put to rest before the whole incident with Thanos and Steve's death. The world had been changing and non-powdered individuals were already working to make the world a better place, not only that but they had been creating new technologies to keep in check those they deemed far too dangerous to be left free. It was something both, Steve and Tony, had been fighting in their own way but that had continued happening during the five years after the Blip. Being a superhero, trying to save everyone was no longer something that could be done so recklessly or even out of good will. It required to be smart, to know which battles to fight and most of the time it was quite unfair. Besides, you and Natasha had tried out the runaways routine, you had been searching to settle down, hence the normal job you had gotten back in Norway. And Natasha, well… 

You glanced at the woman in question, the wrinkles around her eyes were finally showing and there was a complete aura of tiredness she had been carrying for a while. Natasha was tired, and she would be more than happy to step aside. 

“That's why you have been training Yelena.” Your eyes opened wide with realisation, Natasha broke into a half smile but said nothing. “That's the reason you have been working with her, why you have been delegating missions.”

“Yes.” Natasha shrugged standing up and making her way to the coffeemaker. “I have taught her everything I could and she now has a bigger web than mine, she and America should be the next in line.”

“Does she know?” You turned your attention to Yelena then back to Natasha. “She had dreamt to work alongside with you for a long time, you know that was her whole purpose for a while.”

“Yelena is no fool, she knows but we have opted out to not talk about it.”  Natasha poured some coffee shrugging. “At least not yet.”

This was a lot to take in, once more you fo used your eyes on the two women training outside. Yelena was already a seasoned warrior, she had a different glint in her eyes and the missions along with the harshness of her upbringing shown through those clear eyes. America was still young, and even with her experience, she was still hopeful and full of righteous energy around her. She followed instructions easily, learn and then broke those rules to adapt them to her own style. Yelena smirked, she liked what she was seeing in the teen. 

Once more, your mind went back to the young woman laying on your bed. You thought about the days you had spent with her and the life you could have with her. You ère also tired of going around protecting the world putting yourself on the line. You were tired of being alone, thinking your life was only to be a hero. Or a villain. 

Natasha put a mug filled with coffee right in front of you, she offered a wink nodding to the stairs. 

“You two deserve happiness, perhaps it's about time we retired and let the young ones to save the world.” 

You blinked a couple of times, your ears straining hearing the sound of naked feet on the wooden floor. 

“Just in time, do you want some coffee Wanda?”

“Yes, please.” 

You didn't move but your lips curled into a content smile when you felt the sweet touch of a hand brushing your lower back. A bottle of painkillers was put to rest in front of you, turning around you could see only concern in Wanda's eyes. 

“You forgot this upstairs, I thought you may need it since I know you're in pain.” Wanda lifted her hand to brush your hair, caressing the side of your face. 

“Woah, not even a good morning kiss or anything?”

The smirk on your face was matching the one Natasha wore at the moment, Wanda squirmed glancing at you with wide eyes then back at Natasha with some apprehension. You raised a brow at her, and Natasha this time around mirrored your actions. 

“I don't…”

“You don't want to?” The question left your lips with a hint of pain, Wanda opened her eyes shaking her head. 

“Yes!”

“Then, what's the problem?”

“I don't think she wants to, to be honest. Bad breath, perhpas?”

This time around Wanda opened her eyes shaking her head, her cheeks completely red and there was a hint of panic running through her mannerism trying to get the situation under control. 

“No, of course not!!”

You rolled your eyes trying to stand up while shaking your head. 

“Come here, you doofus.”

Natasha snorted turning around to give the both of you a little privacy. You smiled into the kiss, Wanda relaxed her posture stepping back wearing a shy smile. 

“See? It wasn't that hard.”

Wanda pushed you lightly back on the chair, busying herself to try and hide her blush and calm her beating heart. 

“You should take the pills, Y/N, you really look in pain.” Natasha came with another mug she placed in front of Wanda. 

For a brief instant, Wanda and Natasha crossed stares and there was a moment of understanding between them. It was everything Wanda needed it to feel at ease with the situation, to finally let it go and pursue what she wanted with you. 

“You guys have any plans for today?” Natasha inquired leaning back against the sink. 

Wanda glanced at you her green eyes shone with concern pursing her lips but not daring to voice her thoughts. You wanted to go out, to keep exploring the city with Wanda by your side but the pain on your leg would make it impossible. After a moment of consideration you lifted your eyes to the other woman who was waiting for you to answer. 

“No, I guess yesterday's adventure was enough for me and me leg, so today I will rest.” You cocked your head nodding to the yard. “What about you, guys?”

“Not on my end, though I overheard Yelena and America wanting to go to the Old City.” Natasha pursed her lips, “I think they had something planned but I can't quite figure out what it is.”

You chuckled takin a sip from your coffee, Wanda stood behind you her hands resting comfortably on your shoulders. 

“Then, I could cook, if you want and we can stay here, just for today.”

Wanda lowered her gaze until her eyes found yours. Your heart skipped a beat, just as your eyes shone with the deepest of emotions you were experiencing for her. Natasha observed te both of you from afar, wondering just how missing chances the relationship had faced until a mission confronted them with the reality. How many heartbreaks could have been prevented if anyone had worried enough to help and guide the both of you. Natasha softened watching the subtle caresses and brushes of hands, the tenderness behind the stares and the attention Wanda poured on you without any shame. 

There was only hope for the future, and Natasha hoped after the conversation she had with you that morning that you would make the right decision. 

“I think that's perfect.” Natasha jumped forward pointing at you, “get change and go to the pool, you can rest there with Yelena and America and Wanda and I will take care of the rest.”

You blinked a couple of times, your mouth opened ready to retort but the hand on your shoulder stopped you. 

“I think that's a great idea, you can spend some time outside and we will take care of everything else.” Wanda offered a reassuring smile, though you could see the glint of trepidation in her green eyes. 

“Only if you're sure.” 

“I am.” Wanda nodded then grabbing the bottle of pills shake it in front of your eyes. “Keep this with you at all times, and tell me if you need anything at all”

You had a feeling this sudden eagerness to get rid of you had nothing to do with lunch and more so with Natasha and Wanda wanting to have a conversation. You hesitated only for a moment before standing up, you flashed them a content grin before dragging yourself to your room and getting ready for the day. 

_________________________________ It was bound to be a cloudy day, with just the exact amount of warmness for a Tuscan city. You at down on the lounge chair fixing your position so the leg, you leaned back watching as Yelena and America cleaned up a little before coming over to where you were resting. America wore a simple smile, her hair pulled up into a ponytail while she sat on the chair next to yours, Yelena accommodated at the bottom of your chair.

“So, you and Wanda…” Yelena shifted frowning, “what’s really going on?”

You snorted knowing this was the long-awaited conversation you had pending with Yelena. It was one thing to talk about it with Natasha and even with America, but Yelena had always been overprotective of you and at the end of the day the situation presenting itself at the moment was not something ideal. Not for her, anyway.

“What do you want to hear, Lena?”

“The truth would be nice.”

America glanced at the both of you, shifting forward, she opened her mouth to speak but stopped when you lift a hand shaking your head.

“I guess, this was something bound to happen at some point.” You declared; Yelena raised a brow leaning forward.

“Was it? I thought you hated her.”

“I never hated her, Yelena, you know that.”

“I just never expected you to…” Yelena let out a heavy sigh, she leaned back shrugging. “I guess I just never thought it would be like this, you know?”

“I know.” You could see the acceptance in Yelena, the small hint of a doubt gleaming in her eyes was only a response to you being so distant as of late.

“I always thought you would end up with Danvers, not with Maximoff.” Yelena rested her elbows on her knees, she glanced at America then back at you. “Are you happy, at least?”

You chuckled, “I think that we have been working on just getting to know one another once more before jumping into anything rash. But yes, I am happy.”

There was a moment of silence that was filled only by the sweet breeze of early morning brushing their skin, you closed your eyes for a moment enjoying the quietness around you. Yelena was contemplating her future, the restlessness inside her was still pushing her to keep running, to keep moving and get out there into the world.

“Are you?” You asked, Yelena blinked a couple of times pursing her lips.

“Am I what?”

You rolled your eyes nodding, “Happy. Are you happy?”

Yelena looked taken aback by the question, she was silent for a moment until her lips broke into a familiar grin. It was a sight not many got a chance to see genuinely on the blond-haired woman’s face and you were happy to see your family was also getting that little piece of peace and happiness they had always deserved.

“I am. Strangely enough, I have been working on the missions and my life, and I have never been so happy with what I do, or who I am.” Yelena punched you playfully on your leg when you start chuckling. “You better not be laughing at me, I haven’t seen someone so smitten since…”

“…Since you and Kate?”

You raised your brows at the comment, Yelena changed colours going from white to red in almost a second. America covered her mouth almost immediately, but you were just too shocked by such a revelation and of course the reaction it got from Yelena.

“Who is Kate?” You finally asked, America rolled over just on time before Yelena threw at her.

“I’m gonna kill you, you brat!”

“Sorry, sorry! I forgot!”

You observed sitting down on the chair lounge as Yelena caught up with America who was laughing by now. Yelena was speaking in a mixture of Russian and English, she caught up with America before the both of them lose their balance and fell into the pool. It took you a moment to recover from the shook, but as soon as you did you start laughing watching as America was now getting the advantage and was laughing tickling Yelena and swimming out of the way of the blond-haired woman.

They came at you dripping water, with their morning clothes completely drenched and a sense of dignity that didn’t match their recent childish games. You leaned back waiting until they took some of the clothes off grabbing some towels to get dry.

“So, who is Kate?” You asked once more, Yelena lifted her chin trying to pretend this conversation was not going to turn into a discussion about her recent explores in New York City.

“She is a spoil brat, that is quite good with the bow.” She said sitting down while scowling at the way America snorted.

“Okay, and …you like her?” Now this came as a surprised to you since Yelena had never shown any interest in anyone.

Yelena shrugged, “she is fine.”

America opened her mouth to speak but thought better off what to say when she found those clear eyes of Yelena on her.

“A couple of weeks ago I was called for a job in the States.” Yelena mumbled, you know remembering the call, Yelena shifted as if uncomfortable. “I met this woman, she was trying to get to a gang that was terrorizing the city but most importantly, they were threatening her mom.”

“And, is she pretty?” You chuckled when Yelena lifted her arms in defeat, America came right in winking at you.

“I gotta say she is quite beautiful, and she is also funny and pretty smart.”

“So, you’re also smitten by her?”

“What?! No, of course not!” America blushed shaking her head trying to ignore the glare from Yelena.

You cocked your head, blinking a couple of times, “how did you meet her? Weren’t you at school?”

“I was.” America lowered her gaze then returned her attention to you, “but I also have been helping Yelena around, I think…I think it is only right.”

It was at that moment you understood what Natasha meant about the youngest generation. You heard everything Yelena and America decided to tell you at the moment, how they had been working together alongside Kate and other people around the world to build up a new team. It was such an strange concept, watching as they tell you of their hopes and their goals, how the name of the Avengers was still used reverently by many and how others were still waiting for someone to come forth and saved them from the clutches of evil doers.

“You better go get change, I think Natasha and Wanda would be over soon and then we will talk more about this.” You finally said taking everything in.

Yelena was the first one to stand up, she hesitated before turning to you.

“I am happy.” She stated once more, “and I’m glad to know you are happy too. Wanda is not such a bad election, after all.”

“I am happy for you as well, Lena.” You grabbed her hand squeezing it comfortingly. “I don’t want you to get hurt, and I don’t want you to keep any secrets from me, you know I will always be there for you.”

Yelena nodded squeezing your hand back before going inside the house. America had stayed behind, her clothes clinging to her frame. She glanced at you for a long moment, and you waited for the young woman to speak.

“When I first came here I was highly irrational on a lot of things, your relationship with Wanda was one of those things.”

“I remember.” You furrowed your brows, America softened he features.

“I think you were patient with me, and I thank you for…just for listening to me, for helping me out.” She stated swallowing down her emotional response to the conversation, “I know it was hard for you when you saw her that first time back in Norway, but I am glad to see that things are working out with the both of you.”

It was something you never expected to happen, and by the way America was talking at the moment it was something the young woman had doubted as well. Then America stood up and came to you wrapping her arms around you.

“I’m so happy for you and Wanda, I really hope this could be the second chance the both of you deserve.”

Then, America was gone and you were left alone with your thoughts.

The morning was growing old, with not a single sound interrupting your thoughts you observed the trees and the grass, your eyes dancing around the backyard with images of the past, the present and the unknown future dancing inside your head.

Without meaning to, you fell asleep with only hope for the future to not be broken by the past.

____________________

The supermarket was a long way from the Villa.

Natasha and Wanda had driven quietly while letting the music in the car to fill the silence. Wanda glanced out of the window, her thoughts going back to you and how you were fairing with the pain on your leg. She had been dead worried the moment she heard of your accident, when she finally got to see the state you were in her heart had dropped with her mind going blank before crumbling with a single, terrifying thought sneaking inside her head: what if she loses you again?

“She was being reckless.” Natasha broke the silence, her eyes were on the road but Wanda had a feeling the other woman had been observing her out of the corner of her eyes.

“Was she?”

Natasha snorted nodding, “she wanted to finish the mission as soon as she could, she was trying to go back to her monthly date with you.”

Wanda tensed clenching her fists closed, she could imagine you entering a fight in use of your powers to try and get the advantage to finish the mission. Natasha tilted her head turning the car around, her eyes found those of Wanda briefly before continuing.

“I know you and her had been seeing each other for quite some time.” Natasha read the uneasiness on Wanda, the way the younger woman shifted on the seat while lifting her face with her eyes flashing determination.

“Natasha, I…” Wanda started but then trailed off, she was not sure how to approach this conversation.

“Many would say what the both of you are doing is stupid, and it should only lead to you breaking her heart all over again.”

There was a flash of hurt in Wanda’s eyes, she lowered her gaze frowning at the veracity of those words. Everyone had been waiting for Wanda to mess up again. She had even doubt that any kind of relationship could be built with you for as long as her initial betrayal would not be forgotten. It was a constant ghost haunting her whenever she tried to get closer to you. But it was this what the both of you had been working on, it was something Wanda didn’t want to repeat.

“Will I ever be free of my past mistakes, Natasha?” Wanda finally asked tiredly, “I’ve been trying s hard to…”

“To forget about it?”

“To redeem myself.” Wanda retorted forcefully, frowning. “I know I mess up, there is nothing I can do about the past, but I can do something about my present and my future. I have been fighting so hard against the prejudices, against the anger and resentment you guys held against me.”

Wanda spoke with a shaky voice, yet there was full determination in her stance and the force behind her voice. She passed a hand through her locks, her eyes turning to the city spreading before them.

“The moment I saw Y/N once more my whole being shook with longing, my heart broke knowing I could never be with her again because of my mistakes.” Wanda felt the tears welling up in her eyes, she never noticed Natasha stopping the car nor the older woman glancing at her with understanding in her eyes.

“I tried to be her friend, to at least get a chance to earn her friendship and then…” Wanda closed her eyes the visions of the twins, of the lived her counterpart was living with you, the glimpses of what her future could be.

“…then she gave me this chance and I don’t wanna mess up. Not again. I just…I want to love her, I want to be with her.”

The tears rolled down, Wanda lowered her face unable to open her eyes and find herself under a glance of scepticism. She held back a sob when a warm hand placed itself on hers, Wanda opened her eyes finding the green eyes of Natasha glancing back into hers.

“I know it hasn’t been easy for you or her, Wanda. I just want to make sure this is something you and Y/N want.” Natasha softened leaning back into the seat. “I know you guys are till working on your relationship, and I’m glad you were given a second chance with her. Just…don’t break her heart.”

Wanda stood speechless for a moment, she shook her head wiping away her tears breaking into a tiny smile. This was the very first time she actually felt the complete approval from Natasha, it Wanda didn’t know how much it meant for hr until that moment.

“I won’t, believe me, all I want is to…to make her happy.” Wanda sighed looking back into the street. “To love her and be loved by her.”

“Good, then you two should just talk about what the next step is going to be.” Natasha stated seriously. “A lot of things had changed since you were a teen and the world is not what it used to be, perhaps it is time for you two to consider this before making any decisions.”

Wanda was slightly confused at this, she thought about those words furrowing her brows. What did she want with you? Of course, she thought about being with you but, where would she live from now on? Was she ready to leave Kamar-Taj? What did she want to do with her live? What about you?

Natasha chuckled shaking her head, “of course you two were far too busy to even think about this.”

“I haven’t had the time to actually sit down and think about it, you know?” Wanda answered defensively. “Ever since I was back and the fight with Thanos my life has been a rollercoaster, I haven’t had the time to think about anything at all.”

“I know.” Natasha shrugged turning the car on again. “It is worth thinking and talking about with Y/N, don’t you think? Just to know where you guys are doing from now on, how you guys want this second chance to go. Just, think about it before doing something rash or…”

Natasha didn’t finish her thoughts, but for Wanda it was quite obvious what she meant. The young witch leaned back against the seat thinking about this, up until that point she had not considered any of this and while Natasha finally reached the supermarket and spoke about the ingredients and the things they would need in the house, Wanda couldn’t help but thing of the conversation that was waiting her back in the Villa.

A conversation that might lead to the future she was looking with you.

_______________________________

America realized she had come into the strangest of families she could meet in her travels.

She sat at table watching as Natasha and Wanda worked around with the dishes and the food getting everything ready while Y/N and Yelena talked about football and the oncoming matches in the European league. The environment was finally free of any tension, and all that was left was a room filled with familiarity and hopefulness.

It had been a long way to get to this point, America had been jumping around universes before coming across you and the others. She knew that it had been a long way before you and the others could come into this kind of gathering; a year ago everyone had looked at Wanda with anger and resentment, but those stares had been changing with time and at the moment the only thing America could see was acceptance, on Natasha’s and Yelena’s side, and love on your part.

America couldn’t help but smile.

Even in the midst of such dangers in the world, even after all the hurt and misunderstanding there was still hope for something as beautiful as love and friendship was possible.

“Okay, you two just shut up and enjoy,” Natasha finally sat down nodding to Yelena and Y/N, the both of them turned to their plates, with Wanda sitting by your side.

“You guys really went out of your way to cook,” You softened your stare while turning to Wanda, “it’s good to know someone is out there to make sure Tasha is not burning pasta.”

Yelena started laughing until a napkin hit her face, Natasha glared at her sister who flipped her. The older woman raised a brow rolling her eyes at the mature response, America chuckled taking a sip from her glass.

“I burn it once, and in all honestly it wouldn’t have happened if you had collaborated a little.”

“Hey! It wasn’t my fault at all!”

“You were supposed to be watching over the water, Y/N.” Natasha replied dryly, you winced remembering the incident smiling sheepishly.

“Yeah, well…we got better after that incident.” You said turning to Wanda with a reassuring smile, Wanda merely chuckled turning to her food.

“I don’t have a problem cooking for you, so we can prevent any accident in the future.”

Wanda spoke before she could stop herself, she tensed lightly her eyes glancing at you with her breath caught in her throat. You nodded taking some of the pasta in your mouth, closing your eyes enjoying the taste of the sauce.

“Mmm, well if you cook like this, count me in.”

Natasha and Yelena glanced at one another before turning their attention to their food, Wanda grinned nodding silently. You took another bite and soon the conversation changed into what you and Wanda had done the day before and what were Yelena’s and America’s plans for the next couple of days.

The conversation went around the table with light topics and stares that spoke more than words. You smiled through the whole ordeal, your hand sneaking around to grab Wanda’s one giving her a reassuring squeeze. Wanda relaxed into your touch, the conversation she had with you the day before and the conversation she had with Natasha still dancing inside her head.

The afternoon sun snaked inside the room, your eyes fluttering open to find the wooden ceiling of your room darkening slightly while the day gave way to the night. The room had the windows opened, with a sweet breeze lurking around to freshen up your skin; there was not a single sound you could detect yet your powers ignited with the movement of a shadow in the far end of the room. You stretched sitting up to accommodate your frame, your eyes squinting to make sense of the form standing by the window.

Wanda Maximoff was standing on the far end of your room contemplating the red and yellowish hues of dusk breaking into the sky.  She had her arms around herself, leaning against the windowsill with her eyes staring far away.

You couldn’t help but soften under the sight, your heart beating painfully inside your chest. With some trouble, you fixed your posture and stood up; taking a deep breath you started making your way to her. Wanda shifted her weight turning around when she heard your approaching footsteps.

“Y/N, what are you doing?” She straightened up ready to come up to you but you stopped her with a gesture of your hand. She hesitated but waited until you reached out to her, a proud smile playing on your lips.

“See? I could do it.”

“I never doubt about your ability to do it, but the wisdom of forcing yourself to do so.” Wanda replied with a light scowl, “how are you feeling?”

“Much better, thank you.”

The sight beyond your window was breathtaking, you leaned against the rail of the window closing your eyes for a moment. Wanda observed you with a warm heart, her arms twitching at her sides until she chewed on her lower lip before wrapping her arms around your waist. You tilted your head, your eyes finding those of Wanda, you felt the corner of your lips twitching upwards while those green eyes twinkled with hesitation.

“This is quite a sight, what were you thinking about?” You leaned back snuggling closer to Wanda, the other woman felt her stomach broke into a million fluttering butterflies while her heart stopped at the gesture.

She tightened her hold on your placing her chin on your shoulder, “I was thinking about finding a job, perhaps finding a house in Ulsteinvik.”

Wanda waited patiently, she could feel the tension in your body and the hold of your breath as she revealed this.

“That sounds nice.” You replied finally breaking into a smile. “I know just the job position for you. I bet you would be a great teacher.”

Wanda chuckled shrugging, “perhaps. I just thought…I couldn’t keep running, and I don’t want to be away from you.”

“Would you stay with me?” You asked, more than living together your house was big enough to have her in there, Wanda hesitated before shaking her head.

“I want us to do this the right way, living with you right now would not be…right.”

You nodded accepting this, your hands rested on top of Wanda’s ones. The last lights of the day soon disappear and gave way to a fresh night; you rested in Wanda’s embrace for a while enjoying the warmth her body provided.

“This was my last mission, Wanda.” You finally stated, “I won’t be going out unless the world is really ending and there is no other option. America and Yelena, they are ready to take over but I just think this should be over. I won’t be a field agent, and while I would love to help around with some desk work…I don’t think I want to go out anymore.”

“I don’t want to fight anymore.” Wanda replied back, “I am tired, and the world is…unforgiven.”

“I know.”

Wanda pecked your cheek, “I will be with you, if you allow me and we can be normal together.”

You smiled nodding.

“I would like that.”

You always thought you wouldn’t be able to forgive Wanda for what she did.

A part of you had always hoped for a confrontation in which you would scream at her, you would hurt her and showed her how happy you were without her by your side. Anger and resentment had defined those first years after the breakup but then, after all that had happened, after everything the both of you had faced, you found yourself resting in her arms thinking about the future.

It was a second chance you didn’t regret at all.

You realized just that beyond that anger there was still love, and that not everything was about you being a hero and saving the world. You could step aside and still be yourself with the people you love by your side. You lifted your eyes to the darkening sky thanking whoever was watching that you had crossed paths with Wanda once more, now after all the scars had been heal you could start a new life, and this time around you would make sure that everything would be as it should have been the very first time.

A story about two broken people who found it in themselves to give each other a second chance to live, to love and to be happy.

[penkura]

knowing [8/8]

Summary: Sanji knew you were the one the moment he met you.

Pairing: Sanji x Reader

Warnings: None really. Normal One Piece stuff I guess.

Note: I changed my mind, I'm posting this today because I loved this and just can't wait any longer. Thank you all for reading this little fanfic!! I wrote this before I fully finished reading Wano, so it's not 100% accurate at first, but that's fine, this is a fanfic of course. I hope you all enjoy, and I do have another two one-shots connected to this series!

Taglist:

@jzkeisuke | @arcanumlaw

[Ch. 1] ● [Ch. 2] ● [Ch. 3] ● [Ch. 4] ● [Ch. 5] ● [Ch. 6] ● [Ch. 7]

With Big Mom and Kaido defeated, Wano freed from the Animal Kingdom Pirates reign, you were beyond relieved when you'd heard you could all rest. Luffy and Zoro seemed near death, both had just woken up when you'd snuck out with Sanji to another area. He still needed rest more than you, and Chopper had followed along to make sure neither of you did anything to upset your wounds. You'd made it out with a few small burns, some scrapes and cuts, a slightly deeper wound on your abdomen, but Chopper had taken great care of you and gotten you as close to 100% as he could. Sanji too of course, he suffered slightly worse wounds than you did, but the geishas had taken great care of him and he had nowhere near the same battle damage as the other two members of your monster trio. Chopper had instructed him to lay down and rest, which Sanji did, trusting your doctor that he knew what was best, despite his wanting to join in whatever party was being started in the other room. You knew there was no way the people of Wano would let you leave without a large celebration, Sanji would just have to wait for that.

After Chopper left the infirmary you'd walked off to, you gave Sanji a smile while saying something about changing your own bandages real quick. Despite your insistence that it was fine, he looked away while you stripped off your shirt to change your bandages, instead quietly pulling something small out of his pocket to occupy his eyes, wondering if now was the best time or if he should wait.

"What's that you've got there, Sanji?"

Your voice brought him out of his millions of thoughts, making him decide that yes now's the time, before he smiled softly and held it up, making your eyes widen and your mouth open just a bit.

There's no way…no way, right?

"I picked this up in Dressrosa."

"Sanji, you did not."

Sanji grinned at you, nodding happily. "I did! I saw it and…I thought of you instantly."

It was a small ring he held in his hand, a thin silver band with some blue gem on it, perhaps a small sapphire, you weren't sure, but it was very pretty to you anyway. You didn't care for gaudy, showy jewelry anyway, so if this really was an engagement ring, you were all too ready to accept.

Even without a ring you'd accept. You loved Sanji, more than anything. If he had shown up to the women's bunks in his pajamas without a ring at 3am and asked you to marry him, you would accept even then. The middle of battle, though not his style, you'd say yes. An evening after dinner where you'd both drank a little too much and were giggly messes, if he said 'marry me' you'd accept instantly, whether you remembered it the next morning or not.

It didn't matter. You'd marry Sanji no matter how he proposed.

"Maybe I'm crazy, or all that wedding talk because of them got to me, or even us playing husband and wife for the time we did here, but…I'm certain of this." His voice was quiet, even though it was just the two of you at the moment, and it made you start to tear up.

It definitely was crazy. The fight with Kaido and Big Mom had ended just two days ago, you were still surprised Sanji was even capable of walking and sitting up right after his fight against Queen. You half wondered if he suffered a blow to the head that knocked something loose that was making him do this right now.

But really, you knew he hadn't. He was mentally sound, he knew what he was doing.

"Sanji…"

"I'm probably the worst mess of a man you've ever met, I'm worthless really, but I know I love you," Sanji smiled softly while you cried and gladly held your hand out for him to take when he reached out for it, "I don't want to ever again look at another woman the way I look at you. I can't imagine myself with anyone else, married to anyone else, becoming a parent with anyone else, if we're so blessed. Everything that's happened recently just made me more aware of that."

Sanji moved more towards the edge of the bed while gently pulling you closer to him. You couldn't have cared less if he was on one knee or not, it didn't matter to you.

What mattered was that it was Sanji.

You wished you weren't crying, especially when he pulled you down beside him, just to place his forehead against yours and wipe your happy tears away.

"I love you so much, [Y/N]. You mean the world to me and I just want to be with you forever. I wanted to ask you weeks ago now, even when we all met up again in Sabaody…but now feels like the perfect time. Please, [Y/N], will you marry me?"

Trying your hardest to stop crying, you nodded and kissed him, hoping he didn't mind your salty, teary kisses.

"Yes! Yes, a million times yes, my dear!"

Sanji pulled you into a tight hug that you returned, telling you again that he loved you and you responded in kind. You took a few minutes to fully calm down, and once you did, you let Sanji put the ring he'd bought all the way back in Dressrosa on your finger, not at all surprised it was a perfect fit. Of course he knew your ring size, either that or he borrowed one of your rings you wore for fun and took it with him to get the right size.

"A perfect fit."

"Just like us." You smiled brightly at Sanji, which he returned before kissing you again.

Your sweet moment was interrupted when the door to the infirmary almost flew open, and you jumped back up a bit, only to be relieved when you saw it was Zoro, who looked like he didn't know what he was even doing there.

"What do you want, moss head??"

"...looking for Chopper." Zoro's eye wandered over to you, noticing you'd been crying and he looked almost ready to cut down Sanji, until he took in the fact you now had a ring on your finger.

That same ring he'd watched Sanji pick out in Dressrosa.

"Oh!" You nodded, giving a smile. "He left a while ago, said he was going to go check on the Samurai and Luffy!"

Zoro nodded, turning to leave before he stopped and looked over his shoulder at you. "Congrats. If he hurts you, let me know and I'll kill him."

"Zoro!"

"As if you could, moss head!!"

"Sanji, stay in bed!" You pushed him back down when he went to get up, a scowl on his face while Zoro left and closed the door behind him. Sanji started complaining to you about the "stupid moss head" and how he couldn't touch him, but it made you laugh.

"What's so funny?"

"Oh…it's just…it's like a little brother protecting his big sister…that's all Zoro means by it."

Somehow, Sanji understood what you meant when you said that. If his family had been different, he probably would have been the same with Reiju, protective of her when any potential boyfriends or suitors would come to see her, if they ever did considering how their father was. If your lives were different, if you had met under different circumstances, he was sure your biological brothers would be the same.

While he was thinking about it, Sanji barely realized you had crawled into bed with him, until you wrapped your arms around him and hugged him close. He did the same, kissing the top of your head as well.

"I love you, Sanji."

"I love you too."

I can't wait to marry you.

+!+

Once the Thousand Sunny had taken off from Wano, your next destination decided by the log pose, you were determined to be married with your found family as the witnesses. While in Wano, you and Sanji had slipped away to find something like a courthouse, whatever their equivalent was, to get a marriage certificate so you could have a small ceremony on the Sunny. It took a bit of time, but you found a place that processed marriage certificates and got one printed immediately, knowing that technically, as soon as you signed and dated it, you'd be husband and wife.

You hadn't told anyone yet, Zoro would never, you knew that, but you had told Sanji you wanted everyone there and to be married on the ship you called home. He quickly agreed, telling you that he'd do whatever you wanted for the wedding, while thinking it was the best place for you two to get married. You were both absolutely sure your crewmates would be happy for you, they'd all be glad to participate in the wedding and help you two tie the knot.

You also made Sanji promise not to spend so much time on the cake or to make it too big, though you had to give some leeway there due to Luffy. But he promised he wouldn't work on it so much that he was doing last minute touches when he was supposed to be saying his vows to you. You didn't want the wedding to be an extravagant, fancy affair. Just something small and simple with everyone you loved there.

Sanji didn't tell you, though, that he'd talked to Nami and told her you two were engaged and wanting to get married as soon as possible. She was so happy for the two of you that she burst into tears and hugged him, about to run off to find you when he stopped her. He wanted to surprise you with your parents and siblings at the ceremony, and knew your home was an island in the New World, so Nami put the ship on a detour there in the middle of the night when Sanji had a night watch, so no one would have any idea. There were no questions about where the ship was heading the next morning, and Nami was constantly talking about romance and things like that to you, trying to get you to spill your engagement to her. Anything she said you related back to Sanji with a smile, annoying her that you were acting so dense.

It was about two days before your unknown arrival to your home island that Sanji convinced you to tell everyone. You had gone over it multiple times in your head, wondering if it was a good time, before he told you that you'd probably never be ready to tell them, so might as well do so now. When he said that, you ended up agreeing and when everyone was on the deck that night, Sanji told them all you two had an announcement to make.

"You guys aren't gonna leave, are you??" Luffy was so terribly concerned that you and Sanji had chosen to leave the crew, but you quickly reassured him it wasn't anything like that.

"No, no, not at all! We," you took a breath and smiled at Sanji, taking his hand, "We've decided to get married."

"Ahh!"

"And we want the ceremony to be on Sunny in a few days."

"AHH!!"

Everyone was so excited for the two of you! Nami immediately ran over and hugged you, Robin joining her after a moment and both asking to see your ring, where Sanji got it, and what you were going to wear. Luffy laughed a bit and threw himself on Sanji, saying he was glad for the two of you. Brook said something weird about marriage; Franky was crying but patting Sanji on the back; Usopp wanted to know when and how you'd be married without a priest; Chopper said he was very excited for the two of you; Jimbei also gave his congratulations, saying he may not have known you both very long, but you seemed like quite the loving couple, and Zoro, who still viewed you as his sister, reiterated his previous statement of being willing to kill Sanji if he ever hurt you. Before Sanji could argue back at him, Zoro put a hand on his shoulder and congratulated him, causing everyone that heard him to be shocked, and then even more surprised when Sanji thanked him.

The Straw Hats threw a celebration party for the two of you the rest of the night, almost like an engagement party. There was a point where Sanji had slipped away, knowing you were in good hands with Nami and Robin, who were trying to help you decide on a few things for the wedding. He went back to your shared room, picking up the transponder snail you'd bought a while back, and made a call to the Baratie. He didn't let whoever picked up know it was him, requesting to speak to Zeff personally.

"Hey, old man, it's me."

"Sanji? What's this about, calling after heading off two years ago?"

"I…I had some news I wanted to tell you, that's all."

He couldn't see him, but Zeff was a slight bit concerned with how calm Sanji sounded, to the point he made him hold on while he transferred the call over to his personal snail.

"Sanji, you in here?" You had gone searching for your fiance once you noticed he was missing and found him in your room, he waved you over to sit beside him on the bed while he waited for Zeff to get back on the phone. "Who'd you call?"

"Zeff."

"Ooooh." You nodded and took his free hand in yours, Sanji gripping it tightly, nervously waiting.

"All right, what'd you wanna tell me, kid?"

"I'm…getting married in a few days. I just…I wanted you to know."

It was quiet for a bit, and you worried that maybe Zeff was angry that this was the first thing he'd heard from Sanji in over two years, but then heard laughter.

"So! You finally found a girl willing to put up with you, huh?"

You giggled and Sanji smiled.

"I found a girl that's done more than just put up with me."

The two of you stayed on the line with Zeff for a while longer, Sanji's tight grip on your hand loosening after he realized Zeff was truly happy for him. Eventually you decided to let him have his privacy with his true father, kissing his cheek and returning to the party your crewmates were still throwing.

You finally decided you'd get married four days later, the two of you were ready for this step and didn't want anything to interfere, not the Marines or another pirate, nothing.

However, when Nami had said you'd all reached an island to dock at, your breath caught in your throat and you started to tear up when you recognized the pier, despite it being nearly seven years since you'd last been there.

"This…this is my home."

"Yeah," Sanji held your hand and gave you a smile, "I…figured you'd want your family there when we got married, so I asked Nami if we could take a detour. Is…is this okay?"

You looked up at him and smiled brightly, despite the tears threatening to fall down your face. "Of course!!"

Once the Sunny was fully docked, you didn't bother waiting for your allowance from Nami, grabbing Sanji by the arm and dragging him in the direction of your childhood home. None of your crewmates bothered to stop you, they did stop Luffy from following and getting in the way of you introducing your fiance to your family.

To your surprise, your family already knew you were on the way, you figured Sanji had something to do with that as well (you'd be correct if you asked him). Your mom was the first to hug you, telling you how much she missed you and how beautiful you'd become in the last few years. Your dad told you the same, before he and your mom introduced themselves to Sanji, you weren't at all surprised at how easily he won them over despite not being able to ask their permission to marry you.

All your siblings ended up running at you when they knew you were there, and it made you beyond happy to see you had a new sister after all. She was a little more shy around you, but Sanji speaking to her convinced her that everything was all right. Everyone ended up mentioning how they had copies of your wanted poster, your brothers would brag to their friends that their big sister was a badass pirate while your sisters would use that as leverage against the boys in town they didn't like, and it all made you blush and become flustered.

Your parents insisted the two of you and the rest of your crewmates join them for dinner, which you happily accepted and so did Luffy when he heard. Your family gladly accepted your found family, sharing stories and having a lovely time with everyone around.

It got to be a little much for you, you had to step out on the porch for a bit so you didn't get too overwhelmed, Sanji following you a moment later to make sure you were okay.

"You know, sometimes, I wonder what would've happened if I hadn't left."

"Oh yeah?"  Sanji smiled a bit while lighting a cigarette and watching you.

You nodded, sitting down with your legs dangling off the edge of the porch, your youngest sister having followed you and Sanji out the door and now cuddling next to you. She'd opened up quickly and became attached to you and Sanji.

"I wonder if we ever would have met."

"I still would've found you."

"You're sure about that?" You laughed a bit, but Sanji sat down beside you, putting his arm around your shoulders.

"Luffy still would have come to the Baratie and convinced me to join him. We'd still have all the same adventures, and eventually end up here…where I'd find you. And I'd still be attracted to you, and try to get you to come with us, and we'd still end up together."

Humming a bit, you nodded.

"I know you'd still find me."

+!+

The next day was your wedding. You'd woken up early with a bit of happy anxiety, Nami and Robin were already up and ready to help you get dressed and do your hair. You'd ended up buying a white sundress with a [f/c] colored sash around the waist and white flats to make it simple, you never really wanted a fancy wedding dress anyway. Nami took a curling iron to your hair and added some soft curls, while Robin brought you a flower crown your sisters had made overnight for you to wear in place of a veil. Both girls were still beyond excited for you, and Nami kept giving you hugs through the morning. You and her were like sisters at this point, she'd already called being aunt to any kids you and Sanji may have in the future. Having her and Robin with you helped calm your nerves, and you were more than ready to get married to the love of your life.

Sanji, though, was almost a nervous wreck. He'd already gone through half a pack of cigarettes, before he even got dressed for your wedding. You'd told him during the events at Whole Cake Island that you really preferred black suits on him, so he gladly got one specifically for your wedding, choosing a [f/c] colored tie to match with you. He didn't know why he was so nervous, probably the fears that he wasn't good enough for you and wouldn't be able to make you happy were the cause, but he couldn't stop his racing mind. He tried everything but went back to smoking as his stress reliever, worried you'd change your mind at the last second and leave him.

"She's not gonna leave you."

Surprisingly, Zoro was the one to get Sanji to calm down.

"And what if she does?"

"She won't. She wouldn't have agreed to marry you and plan a wedding so quickly if she wasn't sure about it. If she didn't want to be with you she would've rejected your ass all the way back at Alabasta."

"What. How do you know about that?! I thought you didn’t know until Skypiea!"

Zoro rolled his visible eye and smirked.

"You guys weren't exactly subtle back then. Freaking weirdos making out in the kitchen."

Despite Zoro being amused, Sanji knew he was right. If you really didn't love him and were going to leave, you probably would have done so after everything that happened with his family and that attempted arranged marriage. Instead you had stuck by him, giving him a smile and hug when he first told you how much he loved you, repeating it to him every day since you all had left Thriller Bark, telling him even more so after you'd retrieved him from his screwed up family, giving him the time he needed before showering him in hugs, kisses, and constant 'I love you's so he knew you'd never leave him or let him go again, and that you understood what he was doing when he fought with Luffy and 'broke up' with you in front of his brothers and sister. When he told you everything about his childhood, despite your crying and wishing you'd been born in the North Blue so you could have been his friend, you accepted every bit of it, telling him how much his mother must have loved him and you would have loved to have met her. He'd never felt more relieved than when you said his past didn't matter, the things his father said didn't matter. What mattered was that he was Sanji and you loved him. That was the first time he'd cried to you, hugging you and letting you stroke his hair, while he thanked you for loving a “failure” like him.

"You're not a failure. You're Sanji, and you're perfect as you are."

Sanji knew Zoro was right, you'd never leave him. If you did he'd fight to get you back, but he was sure that wouldn't be necessary.

"Yeah, you're right. Thanks."

"No problem. …don't tell anyone about this."

"Wouldn't dare."

+!+

Your wedding ceremony went off without a hitch, several hours ago now, and you and Sanji were finally married. While you were being wed, you couldn't stop smiling and crying lightly, Sanji giving you soft sweet smiles while he held your hands. Your mother, Nami, Franky, and Brook were all blubbering messes, you wondered if they'd actually heard anything the whole time. Your dad was slightly teary, but he'd never fully admit that to you. All your siblings were excited, more so that they were on a pirate ship but your wedding was a nice excuse to be on the ship. Luffy couldn't stop grinning, he was beyond happy for the two of you. Usopp was also slightly teary, mostly because he couldn't believe you two were actually getting married. Chopper was anxiously waiting for when he could have cake, but he had told you when he saw you earlier that day that he thought you looked pretty. Robin smiled, looking at you like you were her baby sister who was getting married and she couldn't have been happier for you both. Jimbei acted as your priest, after you learned he actually could legally perform marriages, you practically begged him to be the one to marry you. He agreed quickly and you were grateful for it. Zoro, always the quiet one, watched without much emotion visible on his face, but those of you who knew him well enough could see he was happy for you.

Of course, you and Sanji were the happiest ones there. Your ceremony wasn't long, it didn't need to be really, just something small to show you were committed to each other, now and forever. When Jimbei pronounced you husband and wife, and said Sanji could kiss you, you had to keep yourself from almost bouncing out of your shoes in excitement. Once he did kiss you, everyone cheered for you, which made you giggle after breaking the kiss and giving Sanji a smile that he returned.

"We're married!"

He couldn't help it, Sanji picked you up and spun you around, he was so happy! You two had gone from awkwardly facing your feelings for each other, to now being deeply in love, and married finally. He set you back down, only to kiss you again, laying his forehead against yours afterwards.

"I love you, ma femme."

"I love you too, my husband!"

"Come on you lovebirds, let's start the reception!"

The reception, which was really just a normal Straw Hat party, went on for several hours. You had to step away at one point to bid farewell to your family, none of whom wanted to see you go but they understood you couldn't stay on your island for more than a few days, and the Sunny would be taking off in the morning.

Sanji noticed quickly you'd disappeared from his side while he was fighting to keep Luffy from finishing off your piece of cake, and when he saw where you were, he put Zoro in charge of keeping Luffy at bay so he could go stay with you.

Your family had already walked off the dock and back into town when you felt Sanji wrap his arms around your waist and place his chin on the top of your head.

"We'll come back someday."

"I know we will."

"And you can always call or write."

You nod, looking up at Sanji with a smile. "This was a wonderful surprise, thank you. It meant a lot to have them here."

Sanji returned your smile, kissing your forehead. "Anything for you, mon amour."

You were about to suggest the two of you slip out and go off to bed, before Luffy shouted your names.

"Come oooonnnn!! The party's for you guys!" Really he just wanted more cake, but Sanji and Zoro had stopped him from having anything more until you had what you wanted.

Grumbling a bit, Sanji pulled away but still held your waist, causing you to giggle a bit and turn around in his hold, putting your arms around his shoulders.

"A bit longer, then we'll go to bed." You whispered before kissing him with a smile.

He sighed but still nodded. "Fine, fine."

Your reception continued well into the night, you avoided drinking too much so you'd remember it not only in the morning but in years to come. Eventually everyone had either passed out or was calmed down enough to start cleaning, refusing any help from you or Sanji and telling you to both go on to bed, with a kind a smile from Robin or Nami but a sly smirk from Franky.

Once you did, you both simply admired each other's ring and how right it felt to have them now. Within a few more minutes your exhaustion was taking over and you took Sanji's hand in yours, snuggling right up next to him, causing him to do the same with you. You'd consummate your marriage another night, but for tonight, all you wanted was to bask in the fact you were married to the love of your life, and enjoy the warmth that came from knowing that you were his and he was yours. Sanji had tried to say something to you at one point, but you were so near sleep you didn't hear him, except for when he chuckled lightly and kissed the top of your head.

"I love you, [Y/N]...in every lifetime and every universe, I'll always love you."

[areyouwell]

Nostophilia

Noun: An extreme fondness for returning home. For returning to where the heart belongs.

Ch.10

Ch.9, Ch.8, Ch.7, Ch.6, Ch.5.5, Ch.5, Ch.4, Ch.3, Ch.2, Ch.1 <-

Pairing: Mutant!Reader x Logan Howlett

Warnings: none

Word Count: 3.4k

A/N: did y'all really think i was gonna leave it like that? im mean, but im not that mean <3

Taglist:@badbishsblog @reidsworld @idioticstar @toogaytofunctiondangit @ghostyv @wolviesgirl @over-bi-the-wayside @justice4billiam @holyhumorliteraturelight @cxptainbuck @sseleniaa @sadslasher13 @yallgotkik @whyamistillontumbler @maddiedinosaur @bethexo07 @pwpwppeepeoor @y08h

“Hey firefly,” Logan murmured as he set his jacket down on the back of the only chair in the room. The only piece of furniture in the room. It was unspeakably cruel, he thought, how much of your life you’d spent in clinical rooms such as this one, only to spend the rest of eternity in the exact same setting. The sphere of shadow pulsed dully with light like usual, an endless back and forth between your mutation and your brothers. Light encased in dark. 

It had been two years since you’d done this. Since you’d saved the lives of everyone you held dear by doing the one thing you’d always been warned against. You’d known the consequences. Of course you had. Charles hadn’t been subtle in reminding you that using your own shadow would result in this. But you’d done it to spare everyone. 

Crossing the empty, white room, Logan set his hand against the solid, thrumming surface, feeling the small pulses of energy within the prison of your own making. He hoped, somehow, you could still hear him. Still sense his presence, even though he knew it was unlikely. Jean had said he was just hurting himself by continuing to see you. But he dared to hope. For the first time in his godforsaken life, he allowed himself hope. 

“Hi sweetheart,” he murmured again, resting his brow beside his hand. He swore he could still feel you in there. Still smell that one shower gel you used to use. Smell the cherry-flavoured chapstick across your lips. “Sorry s’been a while. Charles has us run ragged with the government. Yeah, they’re still up in arms about the whole thing. Stuck-up pricks.” He growled, smoothing his thumb over the glassy surface of the sphere. “Tryna play it off like they had no goddamn clue any of this was happenin’.” He knew it was his mind playing tricks on him, his own hopes manifesting in his brain, but he indulged in the way he thought he felt you react, a ripple of irritation within the endless well of darkness. “Yeah, I know. We’re workin’ on it, kay? Promise.” 

He didn’t mind Charles working everyone overtime to figure everything out. He owed the Professor big time for working this deal. In exchange for everything the team knew collectively, he was allowed to come in and see you, or what was left of you, every now and then. No cameras, no observations, just you and him. Of course, it hadn’t been like that the first few times. Whatever you had done was completely new in terms of containment, and he used to grit his teeth at the way they poked and prodded what you’d become, searching for any kind of reaction. It was too reminiscent of what you’d already gone through, and he fucking wished you could have been held beneath the school. At least then he didn’t have to wait for fucking government permission to see you. 

It was torture, waiting for every request to be approved or denied, pacing in his room after Charles sent the first email, heading out on Scott’s bike just to blow off some goddamn steam and hoping the faint adrenaline rush would be enough to knock him out by the time he returned. 

It never was. 

With an exhausted sigh, Logan dragged the chair closer to you, the steel complaining beneath his weight as he took a seat. “Wish I had more to catch ya up on but uh, not much’s happened since the last time I was here. Kitty’s beggin’ me to bring her along, by the way. So’s Morgana.” Once again he let his hopes manifest, eyes tricking him into seeing the light within flicker slightly in what he interpreted as excitement. “Yeah? Well alright then, I’ll let 'em know.” He smiled slightly, before his expression faltered, a wave of heartbreaking longing spearing his heart. 

“They miss you, ya know. Kitty and Morgana. Fuck, we all miss you, but they both took it hard. Morgo’s kinda filled in your role, and Jade’s role before you, bein’ like a big sister to her. Oh, and you’ll be pleased to hear Marie and Bobby are finally datin’.” His mind saw the shadows ripple once again, the steady pulsing of light becoming irregular for a moment. “You’re tellin’ me. She kept cryin’ on my shoulder because he wouldn’t notice her or some shit like that. Guess he finally did.” He shrugged, resting his hand back on the surface of your prison, feeling the warmth of your phantom laughter. It sparked his own series of slight chuckles, his thumb smoothing over the surface of the darkness.  

“Erin dropped by the other day with Atlas. They’re uh, engaged now, if you can believe that.” He still couldn’t stand to be around her. After everything she did, the role she played in your death, whenever she would stop by, which was extremely few and far between, he’d always find somewhere else to be. In the weeks following your death, she’d stayed beneath the school in recovery. There was only so much Atlas could do against a slash to the throat, but Morgarna refused to speak to her for a full month afterwards. Even now the redhead was curt with her, only exchanging the briefest of pleasantries whenever they ‘were in the area’. Logan could see right through her ruse though. She was trying to drown her guilt in the empty forgiveness from her friend. Atlas may have been able to understand why she did what she did, but it had almost resulted in your death. 

That was something he could never forgive. 

“I won’t be goin’. To the wedding. Sorry if you wanted to hear how it goes but I think Morgo might make an appearance then dip pretty quick so I’ll get the details from her if ya want.” Something deep within the prison rippled slightly, and he couldn’t make up his mind whether or not it was anger or excitement. Though he guessed, with the last interaction between the two of you, it was most likely the former. Not that it was real. He had to remind himself of that. None of it was real. 

A heavy sense of loss weighed in his heart. Thinking about Erin and Atlas’ wedding made him feel physically sick, but not because of his deep hatred for the girl. But because he couldn’t stop thinking that it should have been you and him. One day, far off into the future, it should have been the two of you getting married. Starting a life together. Maybe one day, even a family. You’d never expressed explicit interest in having kids, but it was something he’d entertained before in the afterglows of your nights together. Something he was always too fucking afraid to bring up.

Now he’d never get the chance. 

“Sorry sweetheart,” he gave the surface of the sphere a soft pat as if you could sense his sudden shift in demeanour. “Just… gettin’ to that time again I guess,” he explained quietly. He never really knew what to do on the days of your anniversary. Should he celebrate? Should he mourn? Should he try and spend it with you in this fucking alabaster room or should he drown his sorrows in liquor and try to forget? The last two years he’d spent it doing the latter, whether he’d intended to or not. It burned to think of the life he could have lived with you, the things you could have done together. But it burned more to ignore it completely. 

Pain was a funny thing. No matter what he did, there really was nothing he could do to escape its claws. A rogue tear lined one of his eyes, and despite promising you he wouldn’t cry during these visits, there were times that even he couldn’t stop himself. “Fuck I miss you, Firefly. So fucking much…” There was so much he still had to say. So much he still had to do. And there had been for the last two years. He was stuck in this purgatory state, not really living but being unable to die. Just… existing. Surviving. And he knew you’d kick his ass for it. He vowed to live a life you’d be proud of, but that proved a lot harder than he thought it was going to be when the woman he wanted as his life partner couldn’t be by his side. 

The surface of the orb shimmered, the glow within stuttering slightly to his grieving mind’s eye. You were telling him off. That much he knew. “Yeah, ‘gotta get my shit together at some point’, right?” He chuckled to himself as he remembered the ways you would attempt to imitate his voice, the way your chin would tuck against your neck to reach the lower parts of your voice and yet still get nowhere near close to his registry. The way he would tell you to stop when, in reality, he wouldn’t give a rat’s ass if you did it forever, as long as you were by his side. 

But you weren’t. He couldn’t protect you. And he knew you’d beat his ass to the ground for the guilt he felt, but he couldn’t help it. He was supposed to protect you. Supposed to keep you safe. And you’d died doing the very same thing for him. The irony wasn’t lost on him, and if it didn’t feel like razor blades to the chest, he’d appreciate the way fate worked. 

If only. 

His phone bleeped from his jacket pocket and he grit his teeth together, closing his eyes against the spike of irritation that flared through his system. He knew who it was and what they wanted, but that didn’t mean he was going to answer straight away. That was until there were three more consecutive notifications, and with a rough sigh, he thrust his hand into the pocket and snatched out his phone. 

“Alright darlin’. Duty calls, somethin’ about a string of real strange murders in the area Chuck wants us to investigate. Thinks it’s some mutant goin’ on a spree,” he paused, feeling the energy within your prison shift uncomfortably. “When’ve you ever known me to be reckless?” The ghost of your mutation spiked beneath his palm and he blew out a laugh. “Okay, yep, I’ll be safe.”

Logan had a moment of self-awareness and the sinking realisation that he must be going insane. Who else would talk to the embodiment of their dead ex’s mutation as if it could hold a conversation? As if it were replying to him. He was going mad. 

With a heavy sigh, he stood from the chair, dragging it back to the corner of the room before swinging his jacket across his shoulders, settling the leather around his arms. After having such an intense moment of realisation, he forwent the usual kiss goodbye. “I’ll be back as soon as I can. Promise,” he mumbled, suddenly wanting to be anywhere but here. Anywhere else he could be drinking himself into an early grave. Or he supposed, earlier grave. Maybe then he could see you again. 

Logan turned to leave, pausing as if to look back to you but decided against it. That was until he caught the reflection of the sphere in the glass of the door. Whilst yes, he was happy to admit he was crazy, he also knew when he was gaslighting himself, and when he was feeding his own delusions, which stopped the moment he stood from the chair. 

Then if that was true…

Why the fuck was the glow within the prison convulsing like that?

He turned back to the sphere, his head tilting to the side as he took a slow step forward. This wasn’t his imagination. Or if it was, he was a lot more tired than he thought he was. But no, it wasn’t his grief playing tricks on him. The light was fading and growing rapidly, like panicked breaths. And it wasn’t his imagination that felt the sharp, almost burst of kinetic energy when he placed his hand against the surface. There was always a hum of power that accompanied the sphere, but not like this.

Logan’s eyes widened slightly, fear icing his blood. What the hell was going on? If this was where he’d watch you fade away after two years of being like this, he didn’t think he could handle it. A bullet to the head wasn’t enough to kill him, something he’d already tried, but living after seeing what he dreaded to see simply wasn’t an option. 

A low, almost imperceptible hum accompanied the frantic pulsing, rising and falling with each anxious glow until even somebody without enhanced hearing would have been able to pick up on it. Taking a step back, Logan couldn’t help but feel yet another overwhelming sense of guilt. He didn’t think he’d done anything wrong. Did he touch the surface too much? Disturb whatever fragile balance you’d found with your brother? He swore lowly, looking around for anything or anyone that might know what the fuck was going on.

Crossing to the small control panel on the wall by the door, Logan jammed his thumb against the speaker, pressing the alarm multiple times before anybody came to the receiver. 

“What?”

“R’you not seein’ this? The fuck is goin’ on?” He snarled, panic rising in his voice as the usually solid surface of the prison started to writhe and hiss like a ball of angry snakes. 

“Hold please.”

“Don’t you fuckin’–” Logan couldn’t believe he’d just been told to hold whilst your mutation had started going fucking crazy. “Motherfucker!” He shouted loud enough to grab the attention of any officials who may be in the control room. Though he couldn’t tear his attention away from the now rapidly deteriorating shadows in the centre of the room. “No… no no nonoNO!” he roared desperately, his voice catching on the ghost of a sob. “I can’t… I can’t do this again, Firefly– please… please don’t make me do this again…” Logan fell to his knees, his head bowing hauntingly similar to the way it did the first time he lost you. “Don’t do this…”

“You didn’t kiss me goodbye.” 

Logan felt as if he’d just been struck by lightning, every hair on his body standing on end as goosebumps prickled his skin. He thought he would have to die before he heard that voice again. Slowly, ever so slowly, he raised his head. 

And his mind went blissfully blank, his heart freezing in his chest. He had to be dead. There was no other way this could be happening otherwise. No other way he’d be looking at you standing across from him, as beautiful as the day he lost you. 

“Hey, handsome.” Your smile was so fucking soft, he didn’t even attempt to cease the tears lining his eyes, flowing down the sides of his face. He staggered to his feet, unable to take his eyes off you. You were exactly the same other than one noticeable change. 

One of your eyes had shifted golden, your iris now the exact same hue as the ones your brother had. 

He whispered your name so delicately, as if any louder and you’d shatter in front of him, and he’d wake up from this dream. But you just smiled wider, nodding gently. He’d intended to approach you slowly, to work his way over to you, wade through the quagmire of confusion, elation, and heartbreak before he got to you. Until your knees buckled beneath you and you collapsed. He surged forward, his chest expanding as his hands graced your sides, pulling you into him as he cushioned your fall.

You were real. This was real.

You were corporeal, here, in his arms, with him. 

His mouth fell open with silent sobs, crushing you into him with careful force, in case you would shatter. Your scent wrapped around his heart like a blanket of comfort, inspiring the same feeling he would get as if he’d just come home to you after a long day. But it was the other way around. 

You’d come home to him.

“Sorry…” you murmured a little weakly against the scruff of his beard, your nose tucked into the side of his neck. “Been a while since I used legs…”

“Wh… how? I don’t– I thought– why?” He had so many fucking questions dancing in his head, a carousel of confusion twirling about his mind as he pulled you back so he could look at you. Truly look at you. 

“I said. You didn’t kiss me goodbye. Pissed me off.” You explained as flatly as you could whilst being utterly exhausted. Logan blinked rapidly, your explanation meaning absolutely nothing in the face of reality. 

“I don’t… understand. You came back after two years because I didn’t kiss you?”

You chuckled tiredly into his chest, barely strong enough to hold your own head up. So he did it for you, his hand cradling the back of your head, supporting you in any way he could. 

“I’m kidding. Jus' took me a while to thread myself back together, honestly. Look, new arms!” You lifted your arms as high as you could, which really wasn’t much considering your severe lack of strength. But Logan gently took your wrists in his hand, his thumb smoothing over the clear skin. No scars. No marks. Just you. And whilst those scars were a testament to everything you’d been through, everything you’d survived, the new meaning wasn’t lost on him.

This was a fresh start.

“And Rowan…?” He asked slowly, his eyes raking from your smooth wrists back up to your face, taking note of each vanished blemish he’d come to know so well. Your lips pulled into a slightly sad smile.

“He’s still here… just, not around, if that makes sense?” 

Brushing back a stray hair from your brow, Logan really took in your new appearance, unable to stop himself from smoothing your cheekbone beneath your one golden eye. “Yeah… it makes sense,” he kept his voice as steady as he could in the face of more emotion than he’d felt since losing you. He felt like he was trying to hold back a tsunami with a spatula, wanting nothing more than to crush you into his chest and cry until his voice was hoarse. “So… you could hear everything?”

“Every word.”

“And I wasn’t…” going crazy, he finished in his head, unable to voice his thoughts. But you knew. Your soft smile of understanding told him you knew. 

“No, you weren’t. It was all I could do, send little wisps and waves to let you know I was still there. Still listening.” You fell into a contemplative silence for a moment, your eyes closing as you rested tiredly against his chest. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“Not giving up on me…”

The dam holding his emotions back cracked, breaking apart completely when he watched tears filter along your lash line. Knowing you didn’t have the strength to hold yourself up, he braced a broad palm against your back and the other against the side of your neck, pulling you up towards him and finally, finally sealing his lips to yours. 

He kissed you with fragile passion, terrified that, with nothing more than a light breeze, you’d be taken from him again. But the way your hands managed to slide up his chest to the scruff at his jaw, the way you leaned into him as much as you could, the way your lips parted for him to find his way home to you. It told him all he needed to know. 

No more experiments.

No more Kreva. 

No more fear of who or what you were. 

This was a new beginning. A fresh start. The start of the rest of your intertwined lives. The other half of his soul had come back to him, knitting together the shattered remains of two years spent grieving. 

Everything he wanted to say to you. Everything that was still left unsaid. He had a second chance. You’d gifted him a second chance. And he wasn’t about to let it slip through his fingers. Not again. 

Never again. 

“Never gonna give up on you, Firefly” he whispered against your lips, carding his hand through the roots of your hair. 

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

[sanjisluvbot]

Isekai Yandere Strawhats x Reader

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Life began to feel so boring. The days blended into one another and suddenly we’re in march. Staying up late catching up on your favorite show because there is nothing better to do right now. One piece was such a breathe of fresh air, full of adventure and characters that seem amazing to be around and explore the world with. You wished to be in the world where u can freely be who you wanted, the world where you weren’t shackled by the burdens of reality.

You’ve been around all the corners of the internet so you know of shifting and astral projection which is exactly what seems to be going on right now. Rewatching episodes leading up to the time skip around 4 in the morning till your eyes flutter shut. Suddenly the wafting scent of the ocean filled your nose. “ Is she a stowaway?” “ How have we just found her we haven’t been on land for over a week now”. You opened your eyes to the snout of a reindeer and other very familiar faces.

You sat up so fast knocking into the poor doctor. Panic set through you because the first assumption anyone would have is that they’re in a dream or— congrats you’ve finally lost your damn mind. “ Who are you people”.

“ We’ve got the same question for you”

“ well I asked first”

The blunt part of a sword was thrust into your face by a very angry green swordsman. Fear etched across your face you give him a once over. Zoro. To your left was Robin and chopper holding his snout on her lap. There should be absolutely no reason that you’re in this world with these wacky 15th century pirates from your goofy anime show. Your voice shakes as you try to convince the green haired man to stop threatening your life.

“ Listen this is surely a misunderstanding, I really don’t understand how I have gotten here and I’m not really too sure who you people are.”

Maybe if they think that I don’t know who they are I can figure out a way to get out of this mess without ruining the story.

“ What is your last memory before you woke up on our ship” a voice from behind spoke. Turning to the left at the top of the stairs was Nami with Sanji following behind her.

“ I was laying in my bed falling asleep and then I woke up here”

After that you were bombarded with questions, what’s your name, your age, if an 8ft skeleton can see your underwear and it nearly drained the life out of you. The sun was now beginning to set after such a long day of being interrogated by the crew you used to watch through a screen. The captain was sitting on the head of the Sunny watching the day fade away when he stretched his arm to you pulling you to sit with him.

It was quiet for a while and nerves began to set in. Does he see through me? I know a lot of people don’t give luffy the credit but he’s way more intelligent than you’d think. “ What is it like where you’re from y/n” he spoke as he turned to face you.

“ Very different.”

“ Tell me about it please”

The sun completely faded into night and the stars littered the sky while you told luffy about “ where you’re from” and he was absolutely entranced by the world he’s never been. You ended up telling Luffy the truth about your origins, somewhat about himself, there was just something so compelling and trusting about him you didn’t think nothing of it. You slept in the girls room next to Nami that night, thinking about the next step and getting home.

Was this really a dream or did your desire to escape mundane life make you shift into this world of unknown.

The next day you went to eat breakfast with the crew and luffy starts spouting all the things you told him the night before. With seemingly no thought behind his words as he swallowed everything on his plate, though his crew members all stopped to stare at you in confusion.

“ I thought you said you weren’t from here?”

“ You said you didn’t know how you got here”

“ Well I wasn’t exactly lying, I really don’t know how or why I’ve been transported into your world. I just didn’t want to scare you or make you think I’m crazy with all of this.”

Over the next few days you were beginning to settle with the crew, you spent hours getting to know everyone and having the most fun you’ve had in years. Nami and Robin were curious about your world and you were more than elated to tell them all the things you enjoyed. The boys liked when you played their silly games, Sanji was obsessed with everything about you and loved having you perched on the counter when he was cooking so you can serve as his taste tester.

Zoro only just began to acknowledge you after finding out you also had a love for drinking, it became really easy to bond with the man. You knew you had to go back but what’s the harm in spending time with such a loving group of people, it’s not everyday someone is given your experience don’t waste it being worried.

You were able to convince Nami to give you a blank sheet of paper where you wrote all the things you knew about shifting and astral projection. You’ve been with the crew over a week now spending every night trying to shift back to your world. Sometimes you feel close others are strangely disturbed by Robin and Nami whether they are sparking up a conversation with you or knocking things over which disturbs your concentration.

The next few days you began to see birds meaning you were finally reaching land, the sabody archipelago. You know the way this arch ends and you need to go home now before you spend two years on an unknown island doing who knows what because YOU aren’t a straw hat and you have no place where you can learn to polish your skills.

The bubbly island became visible and you’d be reaching it by midday, while you were sitting on the head of the Sunny with Luffy again he asked you his million dollar question.

“ Y/n join my crew” he smiled. Your cheeks burned and you had to turn away from the boy whose smile brightened all your days.

“ Luffy I would love to but—”

“ Great- EVERYONE Y/N” you clasped your hand over his mouth.

“ Luffy l can’t join your crew. I have to go home I don’t even belong in this world”

“ Why do you want to leave” sadness dripped from his voice.

“ Yeah, we’ve been having so much fun” the small doctor announced from the deck.

“ It has been very fun I’ll admit but I don’t belong here with you guys. I’ve got a whole life in my world— and a family and just so much to do.” You reasoned.

The rest of the day the crew seemed angry and distant, you simply couldn’t understand why. When they all found out where you really came from they said they would help you get home. During dinner that night you were seated between luffy and Zoro who barley uttered a word while hushed conversations were surrounding the rest of the table. It was insufferable and reminded you of elementary school when someone didn’t want to be your friend anymore and told everyone about it.

“ Luffy are you upset with me? I haven’t done anything wrong”

“ Why do you want to leave? You just joined the crew and were on a new island”

“ I never said I was joining your crew luffy”

“ you know the captain doesn’t take no for an answer y/n” Zoro chuckled.

With a huff you stood up everyone’s eyes landing on you. “ Are you all acting this way because you don’t want me to leave?”

“ Why would we want a crew member to leave us?” Nami’s voice wobbled as tears formed in her eyes. Are they serious? When did u ever agree or tell these people that you were a part of their crew.

“ Listen closely all of you. You have to understand I am not from here, I never joined the straw hats, and I don’t even have any powers I can’t protect myself.”

“ That’s why you have me Y/n-chwaaan”

“ ignore that idiot cook but you have Luffy and I, we wouldn’t let anything happen to you”

“ Who is an idiot you damn moss ball !”

A fight between the cook and the swordsman broke out and you would usually find everything hilarious but…

These people have convinced themselves you are one of them and they don’t want you to leave. You decided tonight will be the night where you will go home with or without their help especially because you already know what’s in store the next day. Laying next to Nami that night waiting for her breathing to even out so you can concentrate with no interruptions you hear soft sobbing.

“ Are you alright Nami..”

“ Y/n I know you want to go back but can you stay a little longer we all care about you and enjoy having you around. We really feel like you’re one of our crew mates”

“ Sure, I’m not missing anything important right now” lying is better than letting this girl cry all night. When her breathing finally evened out you were able to try again.

Eyes fluttering open you were finally in your own bedroom. It was just as you left it, your iPad paused on the intro to one piece and the sun was showing through your curtains.

I really did it.

Life began as usual but you had a newfound appreciation for all the little things that made life worth it. Friends and family found your new outlook pleasant and you finally felt like you turned on a new leaf. While you were getting ready for bed applying all of your creams and oils the Tv in the living room turned on.

Wealth, Fame, Power.

A chill ran through your spine, you haven’t watched the show in over a month in fear of being brought back into that world by some odd chance. Getting up to turn off the tv something in the hallway made a noise. The fear of someone or something being in your house had you clenching on the door knob for dear life.

Just open the door nothing is there you’re only scaring yourself.

Opening the door and walking down the dark hallway into the softly illuminated living room the episode of the strawhats finally meeting up after two years was playing.

“ My favorite arch I should rewatch soon”

“ Why don’t you live it instead?” A voice from behind hissed.

You felt your heart thumping in your ears as you slowly turned to be met with a very angry Captain.

——

Not proofread ! 🫶🏽

I was inspired by a similar stories I’ve seen down the tl hope you enjoyed. Pt 2 coming soon maybe

[into-the-feniverse]

Finished reading Trigun/TriMax a couple days ago and have been feverishly trying to piece together a timeline, so here’s the result of that ✨

EDIT: as of 3/13/24 this has been UPDATED

For a more detailed timeline (with vol/ch marks): google sheet

Full res of the graphic (& other resources): bit.l/trigunresources

Notes & rest of the timeline under the cut!

Edits as of 3/13/24

The detailed spreadsheet is organized and color coded! If you'd like a more concise breakdown of events/see some of my reasoning behind certain time stamps feel free to skim through that

Changed where in the timeline the Maylene and Wolfwood events happened (originally where I had placed them would have made Maylene like 6 when she and Wolfwood reunited which is NOT correct)

moved where in the timeline Knives started collecting the GungHo Guns (at latest he started in 0090 (20 years before 0110) since it's noted that Monev has been training in a cellar for the past 20 years

Moved where Knives initially tracked down Conrad (felt like it needed to happen at least a decade before July)

Changed up some of the months (personally, I don't think the Ark launched in December, since that'd put Milly and Meryl's arrival to the colony in July, which wouldn't make sense. So I placed the ark launch in October which of course offset some of the other month stand ins)

Added an earth year for when Knives and Vash are born. The explanation is I think at minimum there was at least a 2 year period between them and Tesla (since Rem was around for that whole process). I do think it was more than that, but that’s the earliest possible year I think it could have happened. Personally I’m more in the camp of 5-10 years, but def not 50 like in tristamp

Old Notes:

If you see any typos or phrase inconsistencies: no you don’t 💕 (😭)

Blue text can be completely ignored, that’s just kinda my personal preference/wild guesstimating of when “exactly” those events happened

Blue lines can also be ignored, they’re also just rough guesstimates on where exactly in the timeline these could have happened

The distance of the lines from one another doesn’t really mean anything, I started trying to follow a system to notate when things happened really close together but it was//// not consistently done ngl

Fun fact: by the time Wolfwood leaves the orphanage Meryl is 18! And she was 14 at the time of July’s destruction

Additional fun fact: Brad is 17 when he and sensei meet up with Vash in the Factioned city (which I think is absolutely RIDICULOUS), and we know this because he was 4 the one/last time he had met Vash and it’s been 13 years since

It was noted by Karen, one of Meryl’s coworkers, that she and Milly had been on assignment with Vash for about 4 months. (Might be that they were out searching for him during that time as well, but I’m choosing to interpret it as they were actually with him for that amount of time)

I’m also working on a 98 timeline for comparison (but more like just sequence of events cause I don’t think I have the patience to sift through the lore quite as much… mainly making it just to clarify how the anime delineates from the manga)

I am//::: feeling v unhinged after this and feel like it could be improved/i need to do a more thorough read, but I’m calling it quits for now before I actually go insane (but hopefully some people will find it somewhat helpful!)

Also: if anybody has any notes to add or clarifications/corrections I would be more than happy to hear them 👂

[acesw]

a short patch timeline on reverse 1999

So I've been going back and forth for almost a year now on comprehending and helping people comprehend the timeline in Reverse: 1999 because oh my god, it's so, so convoluted that it's still taking a long time for me to even write down the information without overexplaining it. And that's just the main story.

However, I've been able to piece together the timeline events by patch and chapter to make things easier for everyone. (...unless you want me to even include the anecdotes, which is another can of worms I'd like to not open.)

However, since 2.0 forwards will be taking place after 1.9, I won't be including the patch names. But, I will put their placements in the timeline without making specific notes to avoid spoilers.

I'd like to first note that 1.6 (Notes on Shuori) has no definite placement on the timeline. The reason why is that 1.6 is personally considered a timeline anomaly; there are plot holes and information that made it difficult to deduce when it took place. (i.e. Yenisei's origins, Getian's character story, Bessmert's* presence) For now, I will leave this out.

Additionally, a lot of the character stories take place between the past and the future. Thus, the character story that chronologically takes place the earliest by far is Lucy's while the latest would be Ezra's.

—

First of all, we start with 1.8 (Farewell, Rayashki) in its entirety. From Windsong's past, to her arrival in Rayashki, to when the second "Storm" took place, and Vila and the kids needed to adjust to this new normal.

Next is Chapter 3 (Nouvelles et Textes pour Rien) and Chapter 5's interchapter. (The Star) Both the story of Vertin's becoming of the Timekeeper, and Greta Hofmann's experience with the Apeiron group are both aligned. Greta even mentions Vertin in her log after returning to the Foundation.

Afterwards we skip to 4 years later, and we're now in 1966. (Post First "Storm") Three events occur here. First, 1.1, (Theft of the Rimet Cup) then 1.3, (Journey to Mor Pankh) and then finally, the Prologue of our story. (This is Tomorrow)

Its then quite straightforward afterwards. We immediately follow up with the first 4 Chapters taking us through 1929 to late 1913. Then afterwards, we have Chapters 5-7 taking place within the first 3 weeks of January 1914, and then we're immediately taken to August 1990 at the end of Chapter 7.

I'd like to also add that within those 3 chapters, both rougelikes (Echoes in the Mountains and Series of Dusks) took place within the same time. Although, Series of Dusks ends before Chapter 7 due to Semmelweis and Lorelei leaving with the Foundation right before the "Storm" hit.

Now, in 1990, we start with 1.2 (Nightmare at Green Lake) followed by patches 2.0-2.2, all of which take place in immediate succession. And then for now, we end with 1.5. (Revival! Of the Uluru Games)

So if I put all of these in one list, it looks like this:

Notes on Shuori (1.6) - Undetermined placement

Farewell, Rayashki (1.8) - 1999+1 (1996) -> 1999+2 (1985)

Nouvelles et Textes pour Rien + The Star (Ch. 3 and Ch. 5 Interchapter) - 1999+4 (1987)

Theft of the Rimet Cup (1.1) - March 1966

Journey to Mor Pankh (1.3) - April-May 1966

This is Tomorrow (Prologue) - Jun. 3 1966 -> Feb. 14 1929

In Our Time (Ch. 1) - Feb. 14 1929

Tender is the Night (Ch. 2) - Feb. 15 1929 -> Aug. 1913

Nouvelles et Textes pour Rien (Ch. 3 - Present Time) - Aug. 25 1913

El Oro de Los Tigres (Ch. 4) - Aug. 26 -> Oct. 10 1913

Prisoner in The Cave (Ch. 5) - Dec. 24 - Jan. 4 1914

The Star (Ch. 5 - Interchapter) - Jan. 4 1914

Echoes in the Mountain (Rougelike 1) - Undetermined time, before Jan. 8 1914

E lucevan le Stelle (Ch. 6) - Jan. 6-12 1914

Series of Dusks (Rougelike 2) - Jan. 8-13 1914

Vereinsamt (Ch. 7) - Jan. 12-13 1914 -> Aug. 1990

Nightmare of Green Lake (1.2) - Sept. - Oct. 1990

Patches 2.0 - 2.2 - Sept. - Nov. 1990

Revival! Of the Uluru Games (1.5) - Jan 1991

The story can only get even more convoluted from here. As of the moment, I've been sort of working on a larger timeline to piece the entire story together, especially since we've yet to finish it before the story ends. New stories and information continuously flows in the meantime.

[wardenparker]

Bones Full of Words, ch 7

Javier Peña x plus size reader Co-written with @absurdthirst

“He pleaded so much that he lost his voice. His bones began to fill with words.” ― Gabriel García Márquez, One Hundred Years of Solitude

Javier Peña had no way of knowing for certain the American journalist he sometimes sees sniffing around the embassy for her stories is also getting information about the narcos from the same girls that he is. After Helena is brutalized by sicarios, it is that same journalist who comes to take her away and look after her -- giving Javi reason to pause and reconsider his opinion of the woman he had previously not considered as anything more than eye candy.

He has no idea that once she has walked fully into his life, he will be battling with himself over whether or not he should stop her from walking out it of again.

Rating: M for Mature but this blog is always 18+ Word Count: 8.3k Warnings: *Blanket warnings for this series: sex work, time period appropriate sexism, cursing, alcohol, food/eating, talk of weight or size, fatphobia (sometimes internalized and sometimes not), canon typical violence* Fatphobia, internalized fatphobia, self-esteem issues. Flirting, objectification, girl talk. Jealousy. Summary: Elisa needs help from Connie, you have a heart-to-heart with Inez, and Chi-Chi is done with all the humans' bullshit. Notes: The tension rises! Apologies for any errors I might have missed. Ya girl had a hell of a week this week.

Ch 1 ~ Ch 2 ~ Ch 3 ~ Ch 4 ~ Ch 5 ~ Ch 6

It wouldn't be another day in Bogotá without something unusual dropping directly into the lives of the Murphys or Javier Peña, but this is out of the ordinary even for them. Connie hustles Elisa down the hallway toward Javi's apartment, explaining that while Steve is already at work, there is a chance Javi isn't yet.

"I just hope he's here," she tells Elisa as she knocks on the door of Javi's apartment.

It's a rare morning that he has the apartment to himself. You had decided to get up early and run some errands before you work on your story. Not even telling him what this next piece is about, you had played things close to the vest. There had been a truce of sorts between you and him, an air of anticipation, as if both of you are waiting for some kind of sign. When someone knocks at the door, he sighs and crushes out his cigarette before getting off the couch and opening the door.

"Well, what have we here?" Javi drawls, looking between the two women when he opens the door.

Connie is too keyed up on the information that Lelisa has just given her to roll her eyes about his greeting. "I'll explain later," she assures him, knowing that Javi will trust her like he would trust Steve. Instead, she looks to Elisa. "I'll be right back. Go." Ushering Elisa inside, she doesn't even wait for the door to close before she takes off to call Steve at the office.

Javi frowns and turns back towards Elisa, wanting someone to tell him something about what the hell is going on. “I take it this isn’t a social call.”

“Not exactly,” Elisa admits, hustling inside when Connie urges her forward and only breathing again when Javi reluctantly shuts the door behind them.

“Fuck.” Javi huffs slightly and motions her farther inside the apartment, happy that you are out for the morning. “Want a drink?”

"Coffee?" It's a little too early for liquor, even for her. "I am sorry to barge in like this."

“Yeah, uh,” he had made an entire pot out of habit, even though you were already gone, so there’s plenty left. “Let me get you a cup. You like creamer? Sugar?”

"Black is fine." Her hands are in the pockets of her scrubs as she looks around the apartment, only to be immediately greeted by the penetrative glare of an enormous dog. It doesn't look dangerous, necessarily, but it doesn't look too happy to see her either.

“Okay.” He pours the cup and turns to hand it to her, watching her warily eye the dog. “That’s Chi Chi.” He tells her. “My- uh, roommate’s dog.” He flusters slightly because he doesn’t know if he should tell this woman your connection to him.

"Oh." Pointing out that she didn't know that Javi had a roommate feels useless since they barely know each other, but Elisa eyes the large dog back before gratefully accepting the coffee cup from Javi's hand. "Um...hi Chi-Chi." It's an attempt, cooing at the dog awkwardly in that high pitched voice that she knows people use with dogs and sometimes cats. She's really not a pet person at all and it probably shows.

The dog watches her for another moment before she hefts herself up off the ground where she had been laying to jump up on the couch and flop back down as if to tell her that she can’t sit there.

"She didn't bark." Elisa sighs in relief. "I'm taking that as a good sign."

He chuckles and doesn’t mention that the dog is basically ignoring her. “Come sit at the table and tell me what is going on.”

"I'm not entirely sure." Elisa admits. She sits down at the table with Javi but her leg begins to bounce with nerves, too jittery to sit still. "I know that Pablo Escobar is planning something with the communist group M-19. I do not know what it is, but I know it will be bad. I told Connie to warn her husband, and asked her to hide me. That is why she brought me to you."

His eyes narrow and he leans forward. “And how do you know what he has planned with M-19?” He demands.

What is the newspapers always say? She purses her lips together and holds the coffee mug between both hands as if she's willing herself to calm down. "A reliable source," she tells him firmly.

“Who is your source?” Javi asks, pressing the point and reaching for his cigarettes. “We can’t help you if we don’t know the information is good.”

Elisa sighs, frowning a little more deeply, and sips the scalding hot coffee. "My ex." She had ended things the second she found out that idiot was making deals with Escobar, so at least it was accurate.

He hums, shaking out a cigarette and offering her one. “What’s his name?”

"Iván Torres." Assuming that a DEA agent involved in things here will know who the members of M-19 are, Elisa knows he will put the pieces together. Realize that she, too, is a member of the group. But the group has changed. Their goals and their loyalties are no longer what she herself was fighting for.

Javi rocks his jaw and stares at her for a moment. If her boyfriend is the leader of M-19. She is involved. “Hell of a joke.” He muses, smirking slightly as he remembers her saying she was a communist.

"I thought it matched a DEA agent joking about being CIA," she admits, though it seems far less amusing now.

“Fair enough.” He knows everyone has their secrets and he’s not as hard to get communists as the Marines stationed at the embassy are. It’s not his place to really care about it. He’s here for the drugs. “Start from the beginning.”

"Last night I went to see Iván after work," Elisa explains, her fingers nervously but soundlessly tapping on the sides of the mug in her hands. "When I went to his house, a man with a gun opened the door. Which is...not unusual, I admit. But I didn't not recognize this one. He demanded to know what I wanted, and I explained that I was Iván's girlfriend. He let me in, but when I walked into the living room, Ivan was sitting on the couch with Escobar."

Javi reaches for the notepad that seems to a constant on the table since you’ve moved in and the pencil beside it. He will need to take notes.

"They shook hands, and said they had a deal," she goes on. "And then Escobar left with his men."

“Anything else? How did he act when Escobar left? What did he say?” He fires off the questions quickly.

"He was not exactly happy." Sipping the coffee simply to have something else to do, Elisa breathes deeply again. "He said that he would not tell me what they were planning unless I agreed to be a part of it, but I cannot do that." Her eyes flick up, finding Javi watching her intently. "He made the deal for money. To fund the revolution the way he wants it. But I joined the fight for the people. Not a drug trafficker."

“Noble.” He snorts, aware that M-19’s kidnappings had resulted in deaths.

"I don't claim to be perfect." Elisa bristles, and rightfully so. "No one is. Nothing can be."

“You’re right, but if your cause needs you to kidnapped people, maybe it’s not the right one.” He points out before he offers her a cigarette. “I’m not judging. You did what you thought was right at the time.”

The slight pause before she accepts the cigarette is time to consider, but she is not here to debate with him. Just to report what happened last night to someone who may be able to help her. "I have heard of the interrogation methods your agents and your friends in Search-Bloc use to get information." She inhales smoke from the cigarette after lighting it and sighs inwardly at the rush of nicotine. At the moment, it is more soothing than anything else. "It is not worth fighting for moral superiority. We can at least agree that Escobar is worse."

He mulls over the comment and concedes. “Do you know when this plan is going down?” He asks.

"Ivan is impatient," she tells him, taking another drag from the cigarette. "It will be soon."

He snorts and wishes that Escobar would be impatient. Impatient men make mistakes. “So what do you want from us?” He asks, coming to the real reason why Elisa is at his door and not going to the Embassy.

It's an uncomfortable question, but she deserves it. Nothing in this world is free. There is a price for everything and hers is crystal clear at this point. "Information in exchange for protection. I have told you what I know, and I have a target on my back now that I witnessed Ivan and Escobar together but refused to cooperate. I need protection."

He knew that was the answer, but he wanted to hear her say it. To see the fear flash in her eyes and know that she understands the danger she has put herself in. “We’ll get you out.” He promises, reaching out and touching her hand.

"Thank you." There is more comfort in the warmth of his hand than she expected. Not just the placation of words, but actual assurance. She believes he will keep his promise. That the upper hand she has given him won't be abused. That she is safe.

“I’m going to need you to go over it again.” Javi tells her softly. “Everything, time of day - where exactly you were, right down to what Escobar was wearing and what the men he was with looked like.” It’s specifics, but that is what is needed.

"I understand." She is also hoping that her cooperation bodes well for what will happen to her afterward. She has willingly put herself in the hands of the American authorities and that will hopefully mean some kind of help for her to keep her out of the hands of Colombian authorities. Or worse, the sicarios.

So she goes through every detail. Working hard to recall every word that was said and everything about the other men who were in the room last night. She even goes so far as to draw a diagram of the room on Javi's notepad with figures marking each person and their name or description. Everything that she can possibly give, she does.

Javi takes notes, meticulously. Cigarette after cigarette is lit and smoked as he goes over the questions again and again, wanting to pull every piece of information out of her as he can. Until he feels like he's gotten everything. "Good." He nods as he looks up at her again. "This is good." Shooting her a smile, he tilts his head. "When you go to America - I wouldn't mention being a communist."

"You'll have to teach me how to talk like an American," she huffs, trying for a laugh but just feeling exhausted.

He knows she’s flirting and he would brush it off, but he’s a little raw from spending so much time with you. He had gone by the brothel the other day and seen you leaving, making him turn around. “Don’t worry.” He promises, shooting her a wink. “You’ll be ready by the time you leave.”

"You are very confident that the ambassador will reward you for my information." And, if she's honest? His confidence is extremely relieving. "I hope you're right."

“We have the upper hand.” Javi admits. “Escobar is escalating in violence and they want him gone.”

"Then I hope you're right even more." She murmurs, knowing that since Escobar has seen her face he surely has learned her name, and that staying here is now mortally dangerous.

“I am.” He’s more confident, but he crushes out his cigarette and stands. “I’ve got to make a call.”

"I'll just...sit tight." Elisa nods and sits back in her seat.

“There’s food in the kitchen.” Javi gestures towards the fridge, knowing that you have stocked it again. “Help yourself.”

She thanks him but doesn't move, watching Javi disappear into the next room while she crosses one leg over the other at the table. The dog has fully dismissed her now and she's sitting alone -- waiting to see what the next step of her future will be.

Javi calls the Embassy and asks to be put through to Steve’s desk. “Fuck, what the hell is your wife doing?” He demands when the phone is picks up and Murphy identifies himself.

"Taking care of a friend." Steve deadpans. He is too busy staring at the small, portable television they keep in the office to pay Javi too much heed at the moment. "Jav," he grunts, inhaling a lung full of nicotine as he watches the live feed on screen. "She called me to tell me about Elisa. I've already told the ambassador."

“And?” Javi asks, hating how he is having to drag information out of Steve right now. “What did she say?” It’s probably a good thing that Steve talked to the ambassador instead of him. She’s still pissed at him about Helena and she might hold that against Elisa.

“Don’t get pissy with me, Peña, I didn’t know any of them.” Steve huffs down the phone, before wiping one hand down the side of his face in aggravation. “Turn on the damn tv. M-19 has already attacked the Palace of Justice. But thanks to her we can link Escobar to it.”

“Goddamn.” Javi hisses and shakes his head, reaching for the remote to the tv in the bedroom. It might be a little excessive to have a tv in here, but he liked watching the news while he gets dressed.

“Keep her safe.” Steve advises, rustling through papers in his desk. He knows he doesn’t have to tell his partner that, but something in him knows that his wife’s friend truly does need the protection.

“She put Escobar in the room with the leader of M-19.” Javi huffs. “She’s going nowhere, but she’s going to cause problems because she’s a communist.”

“Of course she is.” The other man groans in irritated response. “Let’s just keep that part under our hats for now, okay?”

He snorts as he watches the screen. “As much as we can.” He agrees. “Who knows what will happen after this.”

“Don’t come in today.” As much as he hates having to deal with the official shit himself, the place Javi needs to be right now is in his apartment keeping Elisa safe. “Get everything you possibly can out of her. Get that reporter to help you if you have to, but we need everything.” The question of why or how Javier Peña has an American reporter living with him when they’re not fucking — and for all accounts barely like each other — will keep for another day. Today Steve Murphy is just willing to make the most of it.

Javi stiffens, realizing that you will ask questions about why Elisa is here. Now he has to figure out how he’s going to have you living here and the woman he is now tasked with keeping safe. “Yeah. Good idea.” He mutters.

“You okay?” Murphy asks, though the question is absent. He’s watching the small tv in the office again. “Don’t get weird on me now, man.”

Javi snorts and shakes his head. “I’m the weird one?” He demands. “You are living in Colombia and your Spanish is shit, you fucking hillbilly.” He knows the asshole isn’t even paying attention. “Let me know when you hear anything.” He demands and hangs the phone up on him before he can give a half assed answer.

Elisa is still sitting at the table when Javier comes back into the room, legs crossed and nervously picking at her nails.

He rubs his hands on his thighs and sighs. “So, uh, you’re gonna be here until we can get you to the US.” He tells her. “The plan is already rolling. And Escobar will be looking for you.”

A string of curses roll off her tongue but she nods, ultimately sighing in resignation. The hand she waves around his apartment is equally resigned. "Your girlfriend will not like it, I'm sure. But I will keep to myself."

“She’s not my girlfriend.” Javi frowns, the words feeling a little traitorous, but they are the truth. You aren’t his girlfriend. “She sleeps in the other bedroom.” He points out.

"Your...friend..." Instinct tells her the situation is more complicated than he is letting on, but Elisa waves that away for now. "If she is in the other room...where exactly will I be sleeping?"

“Uh—” He hesitates for a moment, knowing that there is another room, but he knows that you’ve started taking it over slowly as an office space when you aren’t working at the kitchen table. For some reason, he’s hesitant to offer it to her without talking to you.

"I don't suppose..." Elisa looks up at him, several weeks of having seen him fleetingly in a small handful of social situations with the Murphys having piqued her interest in him intensely. "You would mind sharing?"

His cock twitches immediately and he lifts a brow at her suggestion. “Moving on from your ex?” He asks with the ghost of a small smirk lifting the edge of his mustache.

"I have been thinking about it." She admits, standing from her chair when his eyebrow raises instead in invitation. "I have been thinking about it since we met at lunch."

“Yeah?” He hums, his eyes dragging up and down her body and he can’t deny that he wants to fuck her. “You don’t have to fuck me to stay here.” He wants to make that clear from the onset. He doesn’t play that kind of shit.

"Of course not." Elisa's head tilts slightly to one side, but she makes no question about returning his gaze. "If I thought you would demand it of me, I would have left already. But, why not find some enjoyment out of an otherwise stressful situation?"

“Cumming is a good way to relax.” He chuckles, smirking in a charming way that you’ve accused him of using to his advantage at times.

"To keep distracted." She agrees with a nod, stepping closer once more. "And pass the time."

“Pass the time, hm?” He reaches out and grabs her waist to drag her closer to him. “Want me to show you the bedroom where you’ll sleep?” He jokes.

"In a minute." Elisa insists, taking that moment and the opportunity it offers, and wraps her arms around Javi's neck to pull him into a kiss.

He doesn’t hesitate, although there’s a thought in the back of his mind as he leans into the movement and presses his lips to hers. He wonders what you are doing right this second.

******

Inez’s new apartment is a walk-up in a part of town that makes you think she might need Chi-Chi more than you do. If the sweet dog hadn’t warmed up to Javier so quickly and thoroughly, you might even be moved to suggest it, but knocking on your friend’s door brings only one thought to the forefront. You can’t wait to hug her and have a good gossip about something other than Javier.

Opening the door requires many locks to be unbolted, but when they are done, she throws the door open happily. “You’re here!” She scoops you up and wraps her arms around you. “I’ve missed seeing you!”

“Hey gorgeous!” You bury yourself in the hug, letting her drag you inside and bundle you up in it, returning the tight squeeze with enthusiasm. “I’ve missed you so fucking much.”

“You look great.” Inez declares. “How have you been? I heard the club will be opening again soon.”

“Yeah, I heard they found new owners and the remodel will be done soon.” Javier and his partner had been keep close tabs on the building, so you’re better than usually informed about the space. “Are you…going back to working there?”

“I don’t know.” She shrugs slightly, trying not to think about the fact that she could have been killed if she was working that night. “The tips were good, but I don’t know if I want to risk it.” She tilts her head. “How’s Alex?”

“You deserve a better place to work than that.” Giving her one more squeeze, you follow her into the small space and plop down on the sofa in her living room with her. There is already a bottle of rum out and glasses, and you groan with delight when she starts to pour. “The other thing, though…I dumped him.”

“Good.” She hadn’t really liked the vibe she got from Alex, but she had never said anything. He had seemed to entertain you and make you happy, so that was all that mattered to her.

“You didn’t like him either, huh?” You huff at her and roll your eyes. “You guys need to say something. Señora Perrín positively danced when she found out.”

“You seemed like you needed the confidence boost.” Inez shrugs and isn’t going to apologize. “Besides if he was amazing, we would be wrong to have talked ill of him.”

“Well, it turns out he was a piece of shit, so he’s not worth wasting breath on anymore.” Raising the glass she hands you, you tap it against hers and savor the friendly sound of clinking glass. “Salud.”

“Damn.” She shakes her head. “I was hoping he was on of the good spooks.”

“I don’t think there’s any such thing.” At least not that you’ve met. And you’ve now met plenty of them. “Chi-Chi sends her love, by the way.”

“I miss that dog.” She laughs, shaking her head. “So where are you staying? Señora Perrín said you had a safe place but she didn’t explain.”

“Yeah, I…” There is no real use in sugar coating it, and your mind is a little fried from chasing down a lead in your next story all damn morning and afternoon. So you just end up shrugging. “Do you remember that guy I went to stay with while Helena was hurt?” You ask, unsure how Inez will react.

“The asshole you couldn’t stand?” She frowns and shakes her head. “What about him?”

“Yeah.” That is what you said, after all. Inez hasn’t been looped in about Javier being your roommate because it’s been so long since you saw her last. “He’s, uh…he’s sort of my roommate now. Or I’m his roommate, I guess you’d say.”

“And you haven’t killed him?” She snorts and looks impressed. “You were not captivated by that guy.” She reminds you. “Honestly? It seemed like you had been interested and he rejected you.”

"Oh we're getting into it early today, huh?" Inez is the friend you can be most honest with, and it's not necessarily surprising that she would be able to cracks these topics open with you. If you had been hoping to avoid the topic of Javier, you are sorely mistaken. "Alright, if we're going to get into this, then what are we having for dinner? Because I'm about to spill my guts to you so I need a full belly for it."

She snorts and grins at you. “I ordered in.” She tells you. “It’s in the kitchen, already. I got Indian.”

"Gorgeous," you groan happily. Samosas and butter chicken and pumpkin curry will make this conversation go much more easily. "I'm sorry it's been so long since we did this, but at least there's plenty to talk about."

“There has been a lot that has changed.” She shrugs slightly, although she has missed sharing some downtime meals with you. Her neighbors aren’t the best. “But now we can spend the evening talking.”

The two of you bustle around her tiny kitchen for a few minutes, bringing take out containers, plates, and forks out to the living room. Once you're sitting again, Inez looks at you expectantly and you blow out a breath. "Okay," you submit, dipping the corner of one samosa in the cilantro sauce that the restaurant sent. "First of all, he is really hot. I'm not going to deny that."

“I have to meet this guy.” She grunts, knowing that you have good taste in attractiveness - despite Alex.

“He’s…” The first bite of food relaxes you a bit, and you pour a little ginger beer into your rum glasses to make a most basic cocktail that will be absolutely delicious with your dinner. “Unfairly pretty. Like Burt Reynolds but sexier. Which I didn’t think was even possible.”

“Burt Reynolds?” She tilts her head and then grins. “Bandit?” She’s seen that movie with you, having found it here dubbed in Spanish and she had really liked it. He was sexy and if your Javier is as sexy as him, then this guy is extremely fuckable.

“Which doesn’t really mean anything. It’s just a fact.” Although you had caught a glimpse of him tugging his shirt over his head on the way out of his room the other day and had to pause to collect yourself.

“I take it you haven’t fucked him?” She asks, lifting a brow.

“No.” That makes you shake your head, willing away the daydreams — and regular dreams — you’ve been starting to have about him. “No. It’s not like that.”

“Wait a minute…” She frowns and stares at her food for a moment before her expression turns contemplative. “Isn’t this the guy you said was responsible for Helena?”

“Admittedly, I jumped to conclusions on that one.” While being protective of your friend is not something you believe at all you ought to apologize for, you most certainly have apologized for thinking that Javier forced her into that situation. You were entirely in the wrong. “I didn’t do my due diligence. It turns out Helena insisted on going into the situation, and Javi had given her advice and direction to navigate it safely. Then…when she got hurt anyway…he got her out as fast as he could and made sure she got to the hospital.”

“Okay, I don’t want to beat his face in now.” She had only heard snippets of the situation and had never really met Helena except in passing. “So he’s a good guy?”

"He's..." A mouthful of curry has you feeling another measure of relaxation, and you shrug one shoulder. "Grumpy. And cranky. And cocky." And despite every less than complimentary word coming out of your mouth, there is an upward curve to one corner of your lips and a barely perceptible softness in your voice. "Yeah. He's a good guy."

“So he’s the exact type of man that you said you despise.” She laughs and takes a bite of her food. “I bet you hate living with him.”

"We're barely ever home at the same time." At least that much is true, and you bury yourself into focusing on your food for a moment. You barely escaped her noticing that you do not, in fact, hate Javier at all. In fact...it's turning into the opposite. "When we are it's fine. But we both work weird hours."

“Well, maybe being roommates with someone who works off hours and keeps to himself is just what you need.” She hums. “Besides, if you trust him, it is a good thing. The neighborhood is far rougher than it used to be.”

"Javi lives near the American embassy," you reveal, knowing that it says a whole lot about his apartment just from the neighborhood that he is in. No part of the city is universally safe, but his spacious, beautiful apartment is definitely in a safer neighborhood.

“Oh God.” Her eyes widen in surprise and she nods, reaching for her drink. “No wonder you leapt at the chance to live there. I would too.”

"And, believe it or not?" This time you go past a small, secret smile and right up to laughing as you fork up another bite of food. "Chi-Chi likes him."

“No fucking way!” She hisses, howling with laughter when you nod. “That dog doesn’t like anyone who doesn’t have a pussy.”

"Just one." You chuckle right along with her. "Just Javier. That's it."

“Fuck.” She marvels at that and picks up her drink to take a sip. “So….” She prompts. “What made you stay with this man?”

"I'm not with him," you clarify, even though Inez already knows that. It just feels like you need to repeat it, although it might be more for yourself than for her. "There was nowhere else. I mean...I had been looking for almost two months. Ultimately the only place I could find that I could afford, was safe, and was okay with Chi-Chi...was the place I was already."

"Then is sounds like it's the perfect place for you." She says wisely. "You will be fine. It sounds like you don't spend much time with him."

“No. I guess not.” And for reasons you are absolutely not prepared to deal with, that deflates you. To the point where you’re now slouching over completely in your seat as you have your dinner. “How is it for you here?” You ask, deflecting the conversation so you don’t think too hard about how you’re starting to actually enjoy the time you spend with your roommate. Your soulmate.

She notices the way you seem to curl in on yourself, but she doesn't press. Instead, she shrugs. "It's alright." She wishes that the raid hadn't ruined the perfect work/life balance for her. "The little bar I'm working in doesn't pay nearly as well as the club, but I'm making it work."

“There’s a place up by me that is looking for more help.” It’s not a lot, but at least it’s something you can offer her. “It’s a more upscale restaurant. I’m not sure what the pay would be like but the tips would be good.”

That could possibly work. She nods. “Yeah, give me their information before you go home tonight.” She asks. “I would like to stop by there.”

“Of course.” It’s a fancy place two blocks down from Javier’s apartment where you’ve seen very well dressed couples go in and out on your walks, and heard it mentioned around the embassy as a place for meetings in the afternoons. It would be safer than any bar she’s working in, in this neighborhood, and definitely better money. “It’s been mentioned around the embassy a bit. So if you end up there make sure you spit in Alex’s drink for me if he ever turns up.”

“Did the bastard cheat?” She would spit in his drink just for shits and giggles but if he cheated on you, she would make him literally shit himself.

“Not that I know of.” Although now that she mentions it, you wouldn’t be surprised. “Turns out he was using me for my living room windows. Trying to stake out the building.”

“Shit.” She hisses. “That fucking bastard.”

"It's my own fault," you shrug. As suspected, the well-made and well-spiced dinner that your friend ordered is softening the harsh blow of the conversation. "I came on to him, remember? That's what I get, I guess. I was feeling good that night."

“Nope.” She shakes her head, frowning fiercely. “You aren’t going to do that. You don’t blame yourself for him being a scumbag.”

"It's done," you tell her, shaking your head again and letting the thought continue on without even pausing to consider what you're saying. "Javi kicked his ass anyway. It's over."

“Wait a minute—” she points her fork at you. “Your roommate kicked Alex’s ass?” She lifts her brows up into her hair they are so high. “Why?”

"Uhhh..." Shit. Shit. Shit. Well, there's no way out of this now. "Apparently Javier overheard Alex talking shit in the embassy men's room and took exception to him insulting me."

“Wow.” She looks suitably impressed. “He is a good guy.” She huffs. “Bring him around one night and I’ll buy him a round.”

"He is." That isn't something you're doing to deny. Especially not after everything he's done for you. "He's like a grumbly old neighborhood dog. The first impression might not always be perfect, but you warm up to him pretty quickly."

“And you would like to warm up to him in bed?” She’s grinning as she asks that question and watching you closely.

"Oh, shut up," you huff, groaning in response.

Cackling in delight when you duck your head in embarrassment, she knows she’s hit the nail on the head. “Ohhhh so you have a big crush.”

"God, it's so much more complicated than that." Another groan comes and you wipe one hand down your face. Rum. You definitely need more rum.

That she doesn’t understand, but she doesn’t push you. “It will work out.” She promises you softly, reaching over and touching your arm sympathetically.

"I honestly don't know." Setting down the rum bottle again, you look up at Inez and sigh. "If I tell you something, will you promise not to freak out?"

“Sure, you know you can tell me anything.” She promises, wondering if you’ve somehow done a background check on him or stalked his ex’s to find out his type.

"The thing is..." You have to give yourself a moment to breathe, and set down your plate on the coffee table to hold your drink in both hands like it's somehow centering you and not just an anchor for all the chaos you've been feeling lately. "We found out that..." Out with it. Just say it. Say it out loud, it's not that scary. It's just a fact and nothing more. "Javier and I are...we're soulmates..."

Inez freezes, shocked and her immediate instinct is to squeal in happiness for you, but she senses that’s not the right move. “And…how do you feel about that?” She breathes out softly.

"Real answer, or kneejerk answer?" You ask, even though you know immediately what she'll say.

“Of course I want to know how you really feel.” She rolls her eyes and smiles at you. “Whatever it is.”

"I feel really fucking confused." It's the truth that you can't even say out loud to the girls, knowing how Freckles and Helena and Vanessa absolutely adore Javier. You need that impartial third party. The person who only knows you and how you're reacting and how unusual this conflict is for you. Someone who doesn't know Javier from a hole in the wall and only cares about your side of the story.

"Because on paper he's...he's kind of perfect. Handsome, charming, smart, totally dry sense of humor. We even like most of the same movies and a lot of the same food. But in reality? Something just isn't clicking, and I don't know what or why."

“Too different?” Inez asks, certain that it has to be something small that you might feel is insurmountable. Like a mountain out of a mole hill situation.

"We're so similar." The opposite of that problem, in fact, which you had always heard tauted as one of the benefits of soulmate relationships. "We' both stubborn and headstrong and...if I'm being completely honest? The biggest difference is that he could have literally anyone he wanted. Despite what the girls say it seems like an insult from the universe that he got stuck with me."

“Does he think it’s an insult?” That title for good guy is hanging by a precarious thread if he feels slighted that his soulmate isn’t some rail thin model. You aren’t as fat as you think you are, or imagine how you look to others. Your self-image is negative and you will always see the worst in yourself even if you champion for others.

This is the sort of challenge from your most honest and most outspoken friend that you don't like very much, because it forces you to admit that your perspective of the situation is skewed. "He says, and the girls say...that he prefers...a fuller figure. But I've never seen him go near anyone my size before. I mean...we've slept with some of the same women. And I adore those girls but they are half my size."

“He pays them?” She asks. “Same as you do?” You nod and she tilts her head. “How many ‘fuller figured’ girls do the sicarios visit?” She even uses air quotes for the annoyed tone that is tacked onto your description of your body type.

"None that I know of," you reason without hesitation. "Because it's not the most common standard of beauty."

“So they would not have the information he was looking for.” She points out. “And it’s not like he can go around fucking everyone and letting his guard down around them.”

"I don't know that there's more than one person in Colombia he's ever let his guard down around." As far as you know, the answer is one single person. Only one. "Just Helena. And she's...as best as I can tell, she's completely in love with him."

“She has to know that you are soulmates.” Her eyes widen again, this time sympathetically for the other woman. “But what does he feel for her?”

"The girls are the ones who told me." The fact that they knew for so long and said nothing is still a sticking point for you, but you understand now why they kept it to themselves. If you're this conflicted now there's no way it would have been any better then. "And, I mean, they're...they're friends. It's unrequited, if that's what you're asking. And she knows that. Which sucks for her, honestly. It sucks to have feelings for someone who doesn't return them."

“So he doesn’t love her, he’s defended you against your asshole ex, he likes bigger girls, but you think it’s unfair that you are his soulmate?” She ticks off the list rationally.

"Oh come on, don't do that." Boiling it down to bullet point facts has you sinking down in your seat again and taking a long sip of your drink. "The number of times a day I think about that man has skyrocketed every single week. It's basically exponential at this point. And if I let myself think about him freely it's just..." You groan, knocking back the end of your second drink and digging the heels of your hands into your eyelids like you're trying to banish a mental image and can't quite get to your mind's eye. "I'm going to end up with feelings for him and that won't end well."

“And that scares you.” Inez had heard your stance on soulmates more than once and she understands why now what caused you to be so wary of the soulmate connection. It’s as if you were sabotaging yourself.

With another sigh, you swallow back the emotion threatening to cut through your voice. The truth of it. The honesty. "Absolutely fucking terrifies me to my core."

“You poor thing.” She sighs and shakes her head. “You just keep your head down and focus on your stories for now.” She advises. “Your moment of clarity will come.”

"You're lucky," you decide, letting out another shaky breath. "I'd give anything to go back to not having any clue who my soulmate was."

“No, you wouldn’t.” She promises, smiling sadly as she looks down at the small, crescent shaped scar on her forearm. “It’s just as terrifying to think that you might never meet them. Or that they could die before you do and then you will be left with the aching sense of loss for someone you’ve never even met. No where to go to mourn, you don’t even know their name.” She shakes her head. “I’m happy for you. Even if you are never more than roommates.”

"Fine." Annoyingly, she's right. Inez knows you better than you know yourself more often than not, and right now there is an eerie sense of how correct she really is that settles over you. Would you be happier never knowing the rancher's son from the borderlands of Texas? No. You wouldn't. You would still be secretly dreaming of whoever it was out there that shared your marks and half of your soul. But knowing and being too scared to reach for him is a different kind of torture. "Then I wish I wasn't so scarred by my past and my self-image and that I could actually have some kind of hope without it being weighed down by fear."

She sighs softly, aware that no amount of arguing or pep talks will convince you that you deserve this chance. “Maybe that will come in time.”

"Maybe." And then again? Maybe not. Right now you feel too far out in the ocean for even that anchor on your ankle to do any good.

Hope. An ironic motto from your home, when you feel like there is absolutely none at all.

******

Water. Elisa slips out of the bed and reaches for the shirt that is heaped on the floor. Slipping into it and only buttoning one of the buttons as she creeps out of the room. Javi is asleep, curled around a pillow after he had let go of her and she smirks slightly at the ache between her thighs. He’s obviously been pent up and it had been animalistic and needy. Just what she craved right now with her future so uncertain.

The front door of the apartment opens quietly. You had gotten a little too tipsy at Inez's place and stayed until you were sober enough to drive home safely. Now you creep in at the late hour just in case Javier has fallen asleep on the couch like he sometimes does. The man gets little enough sleep as it is, he doesn't need you waking him up.

It isn't the sleep form of your roommate guarded dutifully by an enormous but loving dog that greets you, though. It's a very surprised woman fully naked except for the shirt that is barely holding on to her trim frame.

Javier's shirt.

Chi-Chi's low growl pointed in her direction could not be a better echo for the breaking of your heart in this moment.

“Oh.” Elisa has assumed that Javi’s roommate had come home sometime during the hours that he had spent making her see stars. They hadn’t been exactly quietly and she had thought she just must not have heard the door. It was why she was trying to be so quiet when she came to get water. “I’m sorry, I thought—” she shakes her head, knowing that it doesn’t matter what she thinks. “Elisa.” She introduces herself and quickly sets down the glass to start buttoning up the shirt more. You have to be used to this if Javier is your roommate.

“I—” Panic rises in your throat, strangling whatever other words you were about to say. After spending the entire night pouring your heart out to Inez and coming around to the realization that you really are starting to feel things for Javier…you come home to this.

“Excuse me.” Fleeing past her to the room that you have shared with Chi-Chi every day since the raid, you pull the door shut behind you and turn the lock. Barely getting yourself inside before the tears start to fall.

Elisa stares after you for a moment, surprised by the unhappy heartbreak that she had seen on your face before you rushed off. It’s obvious that you have some sort of feelings for your roommate and she wonders if he knows that. She refills the glass, not wanting to run into you again, and makes her way back to the bedroom she is sharing with Javi.

******

When morning comes you stay glued to your bed. The melancholy and self-berating disappointment is still too strong to face the day, and you had planned to do some more recon tonight rather than this morning anyway. The smell of coffee is even more taunting, as you are more than certain that that woman is out there drinking it with him instead of you.

He doesn’t owe you anything. You’re not together and you never pretended to be. But still you’re so jealous that it’s nearly dissolving you into a depressive episode.

When Elisa has come back into the bedroom, Javi had woken up again. He had briefly woken up when she slipped out of the bed, but he had sat up when she had closed the door again. Only to not sleep the rest of the night when she had told him that he had met you.

Now waiting for you to come out into the kitchen so he can explain. His stomach clenching with guilt and annoyance at that guilt.

“Don’t look at me like that.” You mumble at Chi-Chi. The dog will need to be walked soon but you’re probably a bad person for wanting to put it off as long as possible. Just to prevent having to go out there and face the day.

Javi checks his watch as he blows out a sigh. Soon he’s going to have to leave and he really doesn’t want to leave Elisa here without talking to you. He twitches slightly and shakes out his arms as he walks down the hall to your door and taps on it gently.

The sound cuts through the thick silence of your room too sharply, making you frown but you ignore it. If it’s that woman you don’t want to face her, and if it’s him? Well…that might be worse.

He doesn’t hear you and he frowns as he taps on the door again, saying your name. He needs to talk to you.

“Fuuuuck…” The soft groan is more for yourself than anything else, and after about six seconds of debate you drag yourself out of bed and wrap an oversized sweater around yourself to cover up the thin tank top and shorts you usually sleep in. Six more seconds of steeling yourself are necessary before you pull open the door just enough to see him standing there looking carved from marble levels of gorgeous. “Morning,” you manage to mumble. It is certainly not a good one so you won’t claim it to be.

You must be hung over. The look on your face and the way you seem to wince when you see him. He should have brought you a cup of coffee. “I didn’t wake you up, did I?”

“No.” But you still avoid the bright light from the living room behind him or having to look him in the face by casting your eyes down at the floor. “Going to work?” You guess.

“Yeah—” he pauses and feels awkward. “Look, there’s a witness in my room.” Javi blows out, keeping his voice low. “I know you might want to interview her, but I need you to hold any story, okay?” He asks, hoping you will do him this favor. “Can you keep an eye on her for me?”

“Babysit your new girlfriend.” It comes out of your mouth bitingly, much more harshly than you meant it to sound but honest nonetheless. The fact that he would even think to ask you to do that is as heartbreaking as it is cruel. “Sure. Fine. Got it. Although I can promise you I won’t be interviewing her. Anything else?”

His eyes widen and he chokes out your name, the guilt cascading over him again. “She can tie M-19 to Escobar.” He hisses quietly, shuffling closer to you. “They attacked the Palace of Justice yesterday.”

“I genuinely don’t care.” Your own guilt is what pushes that sentence out of your mouth, and you take a step back from him to avoid being too close — which Chi-Chi takes as an invitation as she slips off of your bed and out into the hall. Professional you cares very much that this woman has such important information. But professional you is not in charge right now. “If she needs to be guarded, then don’t work late tonight, okay? I have a lead I’m following after dark.”

“You don’t need to be out too late.” The caution comes out automatically and he frowns when you back up from him. You’re soft and smell like sleep and whatever perfume you had worn, making his cock twitch in his pants as he realizes you have little under that sweater.

“Just gives you more time to fuck your informant,” you snap back, irritated that he would feel so entitled as to tell you how to do your job. “Anything else?” Tacking sir onto the end of it is just on the tip of your tongue, but for all you know he likes that. So you don’t.

He swallows harshly at the venom in your voice. “No.” He steps back and feels the sharp sting of rejection that doesn’t sit well. “There’s coffee in the kitchen.” He offers before he turns around.

His only answer is the slam of your bedroom door. It won’t open again while he’s still home. Once he’s left you’ll take the dog for a walk and do your best to avoid the woman he’s left behind in your shared space while simultaneously not speaking to her at all if you can possibly help it.

Javi almost wakes Elisa up to tell her to just stay in his room, but he doesn’t. Pausing in the hallway for a second and wondering why the hell you are so angry. You had agreed that there wasn’t going to be anything happening between the two of you, why are you acting like he’s cheating on you?

______

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BFoW: @haileymorelikestupid @theorganasolo @missladym1981 @alexiamargot06 @southernbe

[val-cansalute]

summary: You’ve been in Jackson for three months; you’ve been stuck in a perpetual cycle of guilt and ravenous grief, trying desperately to recover from what went down between you and your brother before you left home and came here. Needless to say, you’re fitting in like a lego block in an 1000 piece puzzle, and you realise you’re better off going back to the old house, where you can succumb to the thoughts that plague you. Maria tries to help here and there, shoving you into patrol with people she prays you’ll get along with, namely Ellie Williams. Rather than that, you expectedly remain strong in your stance, both of you as closed off as each other. You come to appreciate the mutual understanding you’ve reached, giving each other space, only ever making slightly critical remarks, to the point where you think you see cracks start to form in your iron shell. But iron is iron, after all.

ch. 1 -

You’re not getting better, definitely worse. Patrol is the only force beckoning you to leave your den of misery, patrol with Ellie. Not much luck there either, you return with an injured ankle and an Ellie who is slightly less awkward and icy, similar to you. Though, when you’re alone with your thoughts again, you are utterly helpless.

ch. 2 -

Progress is dwindling, regress is massive; you’ve been inside for a fucking long time, with your only motivation for getting outside off the table. The numbness is overwhelming, so the knocking goes unanswered as you merge with your mattress. You told yourself you’d leave Jackson once you can walk again. Then, Ellie breaks the door down, with a very important food delivery. She profusely apologises, but the blizzard raging outside captures your focus. She can’t get home now. Sleepover?

ch. 3 -

This chapter contains smut.

The tension is high after last night’s events. Ellie’s on her way soon after, and the consequences of her busting through your door fully set in when the woman from the infirmary manages to get inside to check if your ankle is healing well. Good news: it is. So, you can set off soon. Ellie returns, to your surprise, and she comes bearing gifts. You learn something new everyday, e.g. weed makes you and Ellie horny.

ch. 4 -

Ellie’s departure was a gentle slaughter of your heart, leaving you dazed and empty. It’s time to go. One last meeting with the people of Jackson at the party Ellie left you to help with, and you’re off, leaving nothing but a note and a confused Ellie to read it behind.

ch. 5 -

She’s searching for you, she’s desperate, and hungry, and exhausted, but she’s been worse. There’s no way she won’t find you.

ch. 6 -

This chapter contains smut.

Recovery is a slow process, but Ellie is someone you’ve historically found comfort in. Each day, she expands the bounds of that comfort, and each day, you’re sure you want to live to see another.

playlist:

[deceptive-daydreams]

Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch. 6 | Ch. 7 | Ch. 8 | Ch. 9 | Ch. 10 | Ch. 11 | Ch. 12 | Ch. 13 | Ch. 14 |

Smoke Signals

Chapter One - Damn Mailbox

W/C: 5K

Eddie x Fem reader - Grumpy!Bartender!Eddie x Shy!Reader

Relocating to the small town of Knife’s Edge in hopes of leaving your old life behind and starting brand new solves all of your problems, right? Wrong. It only creates more and one of them may live right next door. Side effects may include blaring music at 3AM, a scowling neighbor, and one too many shots of tequila on several occasions. (That The Bourbon will not be comping.)

A/N: I'm super excited to start this lil series, I've had this idea for a little while and I can never resist writing total opposites, it's just so fun to explore their dynamic when they want to reject each other so bad. Also a lot of this fic is inspired by Smoke Signals by Phoebe Bridgers (hence the name). As always I would love your feedback and any comments y’all have 🙂 OH and finally...the hugest largest biggest thank you to @uglypastels for beta reading and proof reading and all that good stuff, it was SO appreciated and really helped smooth things out ILY Z YOU'RE SO GOOD AT WHAT YOU DO 💜

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Morning dew was like an old friend, someone you hadn’t paid attention to since childhood but felt so familiar with, so…safe.  Maybe it was a little too ridiculous to find security in a few dew drops but arriving in a new town with a population of less than five hundred would have that effect.  Twists and turns of windy roads unknown, trees larger than any house, and barely any infrastructure would all frazzle anyone not accustomed to its elements.  Normally you wouldn’t get car sick but these roads were a beast you’d never encountered before in your life, stomach threatening to send back your lunch of tuna on white bread and a bag of Doritos.  You refused to let bile even trace your tongue so with just enough self control, you swallowed any sickness down and pushed forward.  Now you were hunched over in the driver’s seat, the door open as you sucked in the fresh mountain air, perfect lengthy blades of grass grazing the bottom of the door.  Just before you, up the driveway made up of damp dirt, was home.  A home you were a stranger to at the moment but hoped to at least become acquaintances with.  Lower expectations created less disappointment.  If you dive in head first, you can only guarantee yourself vulnerability and pain, slow and steady was the only pace.

It’s not permanent; you are just figuring things out.

It’s what you kept preaching to yourself during the altitude change, where flatter land transformed into large mountains, the tallest peaks coated in white.  Where your ears popped and your brain felt pressure.  And then shortly after, you were submerged deep into the forests, far from home, where you knew there was no going back for quite some time.  It was a trial run although it didn’t feel that way when the moving truck packed with your life pulled up just minutes after you, delivering every piece of your life to some cabin in a secluded town that was nearly invisible on any map.  Temporary was starting to feel foreign when everything felt more set in stone.

You’d think a town called ‘Knife’s Edge’ would steer you away and maybe that was the intent when it was first named; to ward off newcomers who had no business being out in the woods.  But it only intrigued you.  From what you could find out in a few tourism magazines, Knife’s Edge was not somewhere you went for a getaway, not according to the locals who were a tight knit community where everyone knew everyone.  The economy relied on the small businesses down in The Village, on Main Street which according to your calculations was about five miles down the road and around the lake then up.  That was the extent of knowledge you’d had on your new home and yes, maybe you should have gathered more information before daring to even place a down payment on some random cabin in the woods but when a new start calls, you either answer the phone or stare at it until nothing happens.  The cabin was either yours if you paid the down payment or it would’ve been torn down and sold to the neighbor for more land which would’ve sent you on your way again, on a wild goose chase for a new place that you could fit into.  Not that you were too sure that you’d even fit in here.  But it seemed too obvious that this was where you were meant to be when the realtor advised that it was yours at a low down payment, a steal.  So you’d try to make it work.

The moving truck’s door startled you, slamming against the top as two men got to work, unloading all your belongings.  You figured this was your cue to exit your beat-up sedan to unlock the front door–wide-paneled and made of a beautiful dark oak.  The crunch of pebbles and dirt alerted the movers to your presence where you let them know you were going to open up so they could begin their tedious process, one of them grumbling something incoherent in response.  As you approached even closer, there were knicks and dents decorating the surface of the door but it seemed to add to the essence.  The wooden steps creaked underneath your weight and upon glancing around the porch, you found two well built rocking chairs that the previous owner must have left behind.  Other than that, there were pine needles and other debris from the surrounding nature caked in the corners, some scattered along the rest of the floor that would need to be swept up but it wasn’t an urgent task in comparison to actually setting up your bed and other necessities.

The lock was stubborn as you twisted the key but with one more persistent shove and turn, it clicked and you were able to push your way in, the hinges painfully squeaking as you made a mental note to pick up some WD40.  The air inside was stale, smelling of dust and maybe a half hearted spritz of air freshener.  Or maybe it was drenched in air freshener but it did little to nothing to cover up the smell of an old abandoned cabin; you weren’t sure.  It was a modest size, the kitchen off to the right, tucked into the corner with a small island in the center.  The living room was the first room you walked into from the front, the floorplan more open than you’d expected.  A little to the left was a narrow hallway with shutter doors lining both sides, you assumed one side had to be the laundry.  The door at the end had to be the bedroom and the door just before you embark into the hall had to be the bathroom but you had no time to explore right now.

Morning light trickled in through the kitchen window just above the stove, creating a beautiful hue against the wood paneling of the walls which you only noticed as you came back in, setting a box that was labeled ‘kitchen’ on the counter before rushing back out to retrieve more of your belongings.  It was too early to be doing such strenuous work but that's what you get for securing a slot with the moving company first thing in the morning.  In hindsight, you didn’t realize you were signing yourself up to meet said moving truck at 6:00 AM but in your defense, you’d never done this before. 

By 7:00 AM the truck was fully unloaded and on its way out and with it went the grumpy movers, more than likely unsatisfied with the fact that they’d have to trek back down the mountain.  You graciously offered them an extra twenty bucks which they gladly took but still appeared crabby nonetheless.  Now for the part you had been dreading the most: unpacking each box and putting everything in its respective place.  But first, you wanted to take it all in.  You were right; the laundry was on the left side of the hall behind the shutter door and on the other side was a closet.  The bedroom was settled right where you had guessed, at the end of the hall and rather than being empty, it now held your bed and mattress, sheets still yet to be found among the boxes labeled ‘bedroom’ in thick sharpie.  The wallpaper was something you could do without but maybe you’d find time to peel it off later and replace it with something more to your taste.  Currently the bedroom walls were lined with floral designs and pale blue stripes and if you could be honest, the design was a bit too busy for your liking.  But it was a roof over your head for a good price so complaining was out of the equation.

At the opposite end of the hall, just off the living room was the bathroom, sporting a less off putting wallpaper of faded yellow and white vertical stripes.  You first ensured your hygiene essentials were in place, toothbrush and toothpaste in a glass on the sink, towels on the rack, and soaps set up in the shower including shampoo, conditioner, and bar of Dove.  Having these accessible was a priority, cleanliness being one of the most important factors of your daily routine.  

Clothes were next and you’d forgotten a box in your trunk of your most worn items of clothing that you could pick through until you were fully settled.  Lazily carrying yourself back to the driveway where your maroon sedan sat on top of the copper-toned dirt, you do a double take when you realize your mailbox was taken out, wood splintering out of the ground as the poor box lays among the grass at the edge of the street.  From what you could remember, it was fully intact when you first drove up so you’re forced to conclude that the movers you’d tipped generously must have run it over and not given it a second thought.

The half of the mailbox that rested on the ground was a lot heavier than it looked and you would’ve thought it was made of cement just by the weight.  You felt pathetic dragging it up the driveway, creating a prominent line in the dirt along the way.  A brief break in getting the damn thing up to your porch has you about half way up the driveway, glancing around at your surroundings, only to finally take into account that you had a neighbor relatively close by, a cabin similar to yours only a few hundred yards away except it was a darker wood and a red pickup sat idle in front of it.

You braced yourself, catching your breath to continue hauling the mailbox back until you can figure out how to repair it when your eyes catch on figure, a man making his way down the steps of the cabin you’d just been analyzing.  And you’re quick to shy away until you realize he’d already been looking at you, a cocky grin on his face as he slowly, almost tauntingly stepped off his porch.  The way he walked closer reminded you of a lion declaring its territory, especially with the mane of curls he had, shaggy and brunette.  He wasn’t close enough to allow you to examine any further; however, you caught the click of his tongue before he spoke.

“Gonna get splinters draggin’ wood around like that.”

It’s all he says, a toothpick between his teeth before he turns on his heel, combat boot digging into the soil and it’s only then that you realize he wasn’t offering assistance, he was simply picking up the hose connected to his spigot to rinse off his windshield which now that he’d drawn attention to it, was filthy with mud and leaves.  He wore a red and black flannel which reminded you of a lumberjack but this man just didn’t fit that description based on your short interaction with him.  Or rather his interaction with you.  Your first indication was that he had no facial hair; he was clean-shaven.  And his tight jeans that had black rips at the knees didn’t seem very suitable for a job that required a larger range of motion.

Without any further acknowledgement of your existence, he hopped in his truck and sped off around the bend without a care in the world.  He was a resident douchebag and you’d never even spoken a word to him.  You quickly realized you were still stood in the middle of the driveway with half a mailbox, grunting in protest as you lugged it the rest of the way up to the porch, leaning it against the railing for future contemplation on how to repair it or if you’d have to fork up money for a brand new one.  That was a problem for future you and though future you would be pissed at past you for putting the responsibility on her, you had other things to sort out such as unpacking the rest of the kitchen so you’d be able to actually use it to feed yourself.  And then of course you’d have to make your way into town a ways down the road to actually get groceries because not a crumb of anything edible was packed.  Aside from a bag of Chex Mix that sat in the passenger seat of your car that you’d picked up at a gas station.

–

Going overboard was an understatement when it came to how much you’d actually gotten done.  By 12:00 PM you almost had each room unpacked and put away, moving boxes discarded next to the front door to be thrown out later.  Your plan was to finish off the kitchen and then go into town.  Instead you finished the kitchen and moved from room to room with more motivation than you’d ever experienced in your life.  Maybe it was the adrenaline of living alone, no one else could tell you what to do or where to put things.  It was all up to you and maybe you were a little drunk off that power.  Regardless, you were now worn out and that energy didn’t last very long.  At least you had a freshly made bed for when you came back, that’s what you would reward yourself with. 

If you go grocery shopping then you can come back and nap.

There were still various projects to be done, items to be organized, and objects without a home but for the most part, you could sleep peacefully with the work you’d done today.  The floors were yet to be cleaned and the fridge still needed a good scrub down but that could wait until tonight after you properly refueled.  

Humming to some song you’d heard on the radio earlier, you make your way out the door, patting your pockets for your keys and wallet, both of which you had before locking up and heading for the car.  You rolled your eyes passing the mutilated mailbox, settling into the driver’s seat with an ache in your back from the grueling labor in the early hours of the morning.  Shifting into drive and then rapidly back to park, you remember that these roads are foreign to you and that you could easily get lost and possibly become a bear’s lunch with your luck.  With a tug, the glove box opens and reveals the map you had set in it before embarking on our journey.  The map that was mailed to you of the town didn’t seem very complicated.  But if you happened to make a wrong turn it could land you amongst some rocky cliffs which you thought better to stay away from.  So you carefully examined the route to town, what the people here seemed to call The Village Square.  You took the liberty of drawing your house on the map, a cute little doodle in blue gel pen and then proceeding to draw the rest of the route in the same blue so you’d always have it.

This was it.  A fresh start where no one knew your name.  This would be good for you.  At least that's what you kept trying to convince yourself.  

Goodbye someone else’s daughter and hello new self-made woman.

–

You weren’t lost.  You were just…exploring.

Okay, you were a little lost but the signs for The Village Square kept passing you by and yet you found yourself also passing the same exact pine trees–and you knew they were the same pine trees because every time you saw them you thought ‘hey that kinda looks like a dog’.  At some point it started to feel as if you were spawning in and out of some dimension until you finally turned into a lot directly behind one of the signs, sick of this game of hide and seek.  There were no signs for parking which is why you’d passed by so many times in the first place, and now it seemed like you were behind a restaurant of some kind.  This couldn’t be where everyone parked, right?  Anxiety was pooling in your stomach and before you could sike yourself out, you ultimately decided to park and walk from here.  You would only be a few minutes and hopefully you’d be able to muster up the courage to ask someone where to park from now on, even if it did make you seem like an idiot.

Leaves crunched under your sneakers, an obvious indication of the Fall season trickling one leaf at a time.  As if you were a wary animal, you cautiously walked around the building, finding that it was someplace called The Bourbon; the letters written out in neon red lights that weren’t yet illuminated, the open sign in the window dull signifying they were closed.  You let your eyes roam up and down the street, small businesses lined up all the way through and a few patrons, clearly with an agenda making their way along the sidewalks.  It was a cute place, nestled in a little valley.  Instead of plain old cement the sidewalks were cobblestone and overall it seemed to be a pedestrian oriented community with several cross walks and barely any traffic.  

From here you had no idea how to get to Marvin’s Grocery, which seemed to be one of the only produce stores around according to your map.  The others were a little more out of the way, your house conveniently only around five miles away from The Village Square.  The shops you passed as you attempted to gain a sense of direction were exquisite.  Mom-and-pop shops that either smelled of delicious baked goods or hunger-inducing aromas that filled your nostrils with savory goodness.  The smell would haunt you in the best way for days to come.  A candle shop piqued your interest, as well as a flower shop that bloomed so beautifully among the muted tones of the brick buildings around it.

Everything was so unlike what you were used to, back home things were more commercialized, built for quantity not quality.  Here it seemed to be the polar opposite which you could appreciate.  Corporations were the root of all evil and you had yet to see one single corporation among the several businesses you passed so far.  People seemed friendly but also confused by your presence, offering you a meaningful wave accompanied by a puzzled expression written on every face you encountered.  You were a stranger and it was becoming more apparent the deeper you found yourself in the square.  Some people whispered and you happened to snag onto a few words, mostly grasping ‘is she new?’.  In return, you graced them with a polite smile.  It wasn’t like you to initiate small talk or approach new friendships.  If they happened, they happened per the other party’s account, not yours, never one to try and stand out in the crowd only making this infinitely more uncomfortable for you, which was no one’s fault other than your own insecurity.

Eventually you were able to come face to face with the giant ‘Marvin’s Grocery’ sign which looked to be handpainted in big white letters outlined in black with a few cartoony carrots, a tomato, and a head of lettuce.  Wandering around for an extra ten minutes and refusing to ask for help certainly wasn’t ideal but it did familiarize you with the shops you would soon be buying from on the regular.  And it did give you a soft introduction to the small population of Knife’s Edge which despite the name, the people seemed lovely enough.

The store wasn’t the slightest bit crowded and it wasn’t very large either.  A mother and her two kids skimmed one of the aisles while an older man pondered over the produce, apples specifically.  Grabbing a cart, you begin gathering the items you had sorted out on a list in your head.  First bananas, grapes, and blueberries, you didn’t want to bother with too much produce as it went bad fast and you were only one person so those would do for now.  Then you moved on to pantry essentials, canned goods that you could stock up on and always have on hand.  Green beans, corn, peas, baked beans, even soups such as tomato, cream of mushroom, and the standard chicken noodle.

You’d built up a cart full in no time, and by then,  no one else was around so you noted that this time would be perfect to get your shopping done in the future so as to avoid as many people as possible.  The cashier was a woman, probably in her early sixties who seemed not all that intimidating which you were grateful for.  She smiles warmly and you appreciate the sentiment, grinning back at her as you place each item at the register. 

“You’re new.  But I bet you’ve already had an earful of that, haven’t you?”  She lightly teases.

You laugh softly, avoiding eye contact while still trying to remain well mannered, taking notice in small glances that the woman’s name tag reads Donnie in bold red letters as well as the ‘help wanted’ sign perched up against the window.  She seems friendly, a little rough around the edges though in the sense that she had several tattoos that disappeared into the rolled up sleeve of her blue crewneck sweater as well as a fire in her icy blue eyes.  You could already guess that she was quite the character.

“Don’t let them scare you off.”  Donnie carefully bags the eggs with a few more light items, her confidence radiating, as if she doesn’t even need to try, as if it just comes to her so naturally.  Something you could only wish for every once in a blue moon.  “We don’t get many newbies.  They’ll get it outta their system.”  Her voice is a tad scratchy but smooth otherwise, bringing a strange sense of comfort.

“Thank you.”  A mouse may as well have been louder than you but you tried and that’s what counts, right?  New people were not your thing but they would have to become your thing, moving to a place where no one knew you existed and all.  Or maybe you could fly under the radar?  It couldn’t hurt to become the mysterious outsider that spoke to no one although it wasn’t a very realistic ambition.

This was fucked.  You thought to yourself in the solitude of your brain.  Of course the second thoughts were coming now and not before you bought the damn property that tied you to this place.  Initially, the idea was a temporary situation far from home but the deeper you delved into this town, the more permanent it started to feel.  Not just anyone up and moved here and that was clear by the reaction you pulled from several onlookers.  And yet you moved here, bought that damn cabin with the money left to you from your father’s estate, and ultimately, left everything you knew in a manic state.  A mid life crisis in your early twenties.  

“Miss, your change.”  The woman broke through your thoughts and you must have shifted into autopilot, not even remembering handing her any money in the first place.

“S-sorry.”  You mutter, collecting the filthy coins in your palm, shoving them into the front pocket of your jeans which you knew would be a pain to dig out later but again, that was an issue for future you.  She hated your guts.

“No prob–”

It was abrupt, your exit but despite your rude departure, she called out “I’m Donnie!” and you never felt like a shittier person.  She was welcoming you to her home and you didn’t even have the decency to introduce yourself.  That’s how it looked at least, on the inside you were panicking and needed to isolate yourself immediately.  

You must have looked like a maniac carrying your groceries in a near sprint toward the direction of your car.  Everyone else seemed to move at such a mellow pace, not a single vein close to popping out of stress whereas you looked like you’d crumble under the slightest inconvenience.  Which you would if you didn’t get to the car fast enough.  A small misstep causing you to trip?  No chance, you wouldn’t show your face again for weeks.  Your groceries spilling all over the pavement because of said possible misstep?  You would consider moving all over again.

Thankfully the majority of the walk back to the little lot behind one of many businesses was blacked out, your heart practically pumping in your ear the whole time.  What you couldn’t black out from was the man-the same man from this morning smoking a cigarette as he stared at your car.  Fear drenched you; you couldn’t gauge his expression with his back to you but you could guess he wasn’t going to be smiling with the way he was lingering, shuffling his boots back and forth in contemplation.

Announcing yourself felt like the most daunting task in the world, humiliation melting into your skin like an uncomfortable burn.  Maybe some higher power heard your pathetic struggle because the crunch of your sneaker on a perfectly placed leaf called his attention to you, his head snapping in your direction instantly.

The urge to just run was strong but you maintained whatever cool was left within you, fingers waving at him weakly.

His expression was blank, unreadable.  He didn’t say a word as you slowly inched your way closer to the vehicle, only eyeing your every movement like a predator protecting his territory, much like he did that same morning.  The closer view of his face showcased his stoic yet soft features, eyes almost puppy dog-like but something glazed over them, a facade of some kind.  Something that overtook the puppy dog nature they were capable of and replaced them with a cruel glare.  The shape of his nose was endearing at least, rounded at the tip and tinted pink from the cold.

“You just park anywhere you want where you’re from?”  He asks, gesturing vaguely with a tip of his cigarette toward the car.  

Your shaky breath has him furrowing his brows at you, seemingly offended.  It’s not in your nature to offend people but you can’t seem to stop doing it, especially today whether you mean to or not.  But you definitely don’t think you mean to.

“N-no, ‘m sorry.”

“Sorry?”  He mocks, scoffing before inhaling a puff of smoke once more.

“I-I uh, I’m leaving.  It won’t happen again.”  You rush out, all the while forcing yourself not to cry.  “I just–I couldn’t find parking–I was driving around and—there was no–I couldn’t–”

“Don’t let it happen again.”  He warns, stern but easing up on his intense demeanor.

“Promise.”  You whisper, a tear betraying you and rolling down your cheek to which you quickly gather your grocery bags in one hand to swat away at your cheek.  It’s too late, he already saw.

No empathy is detected in his stare, not that you feel you deserve any.  It was just an observation.  “Now, get out of my lot.”  It’s a demand, a non-negotiable demand that if you were brave enough to argue, would probably have him towing your shitty little sedan.  

So you nod, blinking back the water works as best you could while tossing your groceries into the passenger seat, him watching the whole time.  With your seatbelt suddenly feeling like the most complicated thing in the world, you expect to look up and meet pure rage but instead your ears perk up at a few knocks on the window.  Rolling it down as fast as possible with the manual handle, the man stands towering over you, cigarette abandoned sometime in between you getting in the car and struggling to remember how a seatbelt works.  Did he have more choice words for you for illegally parking on what he deemed ‘his lot’?  You really didn’t want to stick around to find out but you had no choice.

“Left on Main.  Then right on Cherry.”  His dark eyes hinted at hues of warm honey but they were briskly dismissed by his cold attitude.

“What?”

“Next time.  So you don’t turn into my damn lot again.”  

You still didn’t know what he meant by ‘his lot’ and you didn’t have the backbone to ask.  You did however fully get the message that you were to never park here again and were now aware of which streets to search for to avoid it at all costs.  You’d memorize every detail of it if it meant you could steer clear of the apathetic man before you.  With a nervous nod, you were off, not once looking back just as he did that morning except he had more grit in his actions, you just came off as a scared church mouse.  You never even caught his name and you didn’t mind not knowing it at this rate seeing as he was all bite and bark for no good reason.

This place never felt so far from home.  Nowhere was home.  Your heart was in a sense homeless, lost and longing for the connections that these people had with each other that you couldn’t seem to tap into even if your life depended on it.  In all fairness, it had only been a few hours and you couldn’t gauge your success based on that but it was tugging on your brain like a parasite, eating away at your final optimistic thoughts.  

I don’t belong here.

I don’t fit in.

The drive ‘home’ was flooded with tears and muffled sobs into your now sticky sleeve, coated in snot and if anyone were to pass you along the way you would look psychotic with how your face scrunched up at every exhale, doing your best to keep yourself quiet despite being the only one in the car.  You were always doing your best.  Always to please others.  And it never worked.

~end~

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tags - @gravedigginbbydoll @ohauggieo @spicysix @lunatictardis @ali-r3n @batkin028 @mrsjellymunson @witchwolflea @emma77645

[an-abyss-of-stars]

𖤓 Don't You Dare Do This Without Me 𖤓

Pairing: Rhaena x Aemond

Warnings: Smutty hints...mainly consensual

Word Count: 4.6k

Summary: Rhaena THOUGHT she was merely dismissing her husband's call for affection after an argument. Little did she know, her rebuffing had instead sent her petulant husband off on a tirade to burn an enitre village to ash.

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Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ao3

Note: (THIS fic is intended to be a little mini-series. It's a piece of a plot I've been toying around with for a month or two. A Dark King Aemond story with Queen Rhaena grappling with her horrid situation. I do have an entire long form story/idea for this premise, that would start immediately after the war and span over several years. It would be much darker than this smutty snippet, like practically 'dead dove' really! But this little fun fic here entered my brain and I just figured I'd throw it out here as a mini 5-6 part thingy.)

So hopefully it's an enjoyable little something something!!

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"I can't believe him, I can't fuc-" Rhaena's anger induced muttering died upon her tongue as she stepped into her shared royal chambers, her feet halting almost immediately as her legs stiffly stood right in front her three-year-old son. Little Aemon had run up to her as soon as the doors flew open, rushing to hug her skirts as he stared up at her expectantly.

What was he doing here? 

It was early, still the middle of the afternoon, she was certain that by all accounts her toddler should only be nearing the end of lessons now. Not dawdling around in her chambers to play-

"Darling! Sweetling, you are early," Rhaena schooled her previously set scowl into a bright affectionate smile, lilting her voice as her eyes took in the visage of her charming little boy. It was beginning to feel like such an effort, schooling her emotions from her son these days, seeing as he seemed to be so perceptive already. Any slight twinge upon her face, and his sweet little face would scrunch into a look of instant concern for his mother's wellbeing. Followed by the little hand he'd place upon her leg before he asked 'are you well, mama?'. 

It was a wonder where he'd managed to inherit such sweetness, surely not from his father. 

With a gentle sigh, Rhaena began to crouch herself down to Aemon's level, careful to keep her balance as her swollen belly carried a true weight to it now. Her back felt it, her thighs and her knees worked to compensate for it. Offset the weight she'd put on for the health of this third babe. Though she was eight moons along, so she was nearly to term. It was a motion she navigated with skill now, for she knew her body well and so she knew her limits when it came to this stage of her pregnancies. Soon enough she'd seat herself down or lay abed for an hour or two before the ache creeping along her calves worked down to her swollen feet. 

In the meantime, however, she placed a soft hand upon her eldest son's check and smiled warmly at him. Eliciting an equally dazzling giggle from her little boy, the adorable sound almost immediately soothed her heart. Allowing her to push aside the stresses of the day, the endless aggravation only her husband could muster within her, just long enough to focus in on her child. Meeting his gaze, she sought to pry just a tad, "what of your lessons in the library, sweet one? Have they truly concluded or have you managed to escape from your maester yet again?" 

At that, Aemon teetered on his toes for a moment. His hand absentmindedly holding onto Rhaena's shoulder for balance as he happily gurgled at the playful accusation. Gently biting his thumb with his free hand, a near bashful blush spread upon the apples of his cheeks as his attention was just as quickly drawn away. Distracted already, the mop of curly platinum blonde hair that reached the nape of his neck swished with the motion he'd made. His pale cinnamon brown skin glowing in the rays of the afternoon sun. 

Ah, dear...she did love her son dearly, but his mind did tend to wander off all too easily at times. If he was not obsessively focused on something of his interest, his mind was liable to dawdle. It was Rhaena who had to work to lure his attention back to her, nudging his chubby cheek with the caress of her thumb. Adding an accompanying prodding hum for him to both listen and follow the sound. 

Thankfully it was enough, her toddler was quick to turn back to her. His distraction, the glittering rays of beaming sunlight, had poured in through the paneled windows of the room. Illuminating everything within sight of the spacious solar, the various deep crimson red furniture, the large round oak table that was just off center. It was still covered with stacked books and rolled scrolls that Aemond had left out to continue analyzing later in the day. Toys still remained scattered by the fire upon the maroon fur carpet, Rhaena supposed Aemon had been sat there waiting for her return. Most likely playing there with his young wet-nurse, Elaya. 

The nineteen-year old maid from the Riverlands was currently sat by the fire in one of the cozier armchairs, rocking Rhaena's second born son, Daemion, in her arms. Now, Daemion shared many features with his elder brother, the same almond eye-shape and rounded bow-shaped lips…both a blend of their parentage. They held the same curly hair texture, although, Daemion’s little tuft of curls shone more silver than Aemon’s blonde in the sunlight. And Aemon’s skin was slightly paler than Daemion’s. His eyes were a shade of bright lilac as opposed to Aemon’s pale indigo. Daemion’s little button nose reminded Rhaena more of her own than Aemond’s, although the point at the end of it still spoke of the boy’s inheritance from his father. 

In either case, little Daemion’s eyes were levelled low as he relaxed in the arms of his wet-nurse. It was to be expected, Rhaena had only nursed the babe but an hour ago, so it was more than likely that her one-year old was simply feeling the drowsy calls of his milk-filled stomach. She'd left her younger son in the safe arms of her trusted wet-nurse perhaps a half hour ago when she'd initially left her chambers to visit her twin sister, Baela. 

In the case of her eldest, however, Rhaena knew well that the bright afternoon sun was an enticing thing to a young Targaryen. It promised games in the garden, playful training in the training yard...but most of all, it promised the possibility for dragon riding. Aemon was newly minted in the activity, having gone for his first flight with his father just a few days ago. It was all he would talk of, on and on he happily talked the ears off of anyone who'd listen. From Maesters to maids, to his aunt, Baela, to his uncle Aegon, and especially to his equally young cousins Maegelle and Laena. The two daughters Baela had birthed for her husband under Aemond's reign as King. All of a part of rebuilding their family's line, restoring the Targaryen bloodline. 

A bloodline Aemond more than single handedly destroyed himself...but Rhaena had gone down that road before. It never led anywhere, it never returned what she'd lost. 

It was easier to focus on what she did have. The title of Queen may have been thrusted upon her, as well as her first born son...but she'd found her stride. Settled herself into motherhood, her new station, her new title, her seat next to the throne. She'd even willingly taken to her main duty as Queen, found her own pleasure in conceiving her second and soon to be third child. She'd found her way to loving and at times controlling the psychopathic irate dragon she'd been made to call 'husband'. 

Besides, he had his moments, she supposed, he was always good to their sons and their nieces. He quite frankly adored all of the young children they’d brought into the world for House Targaryen. He was prideful over their very existence, especially that of their own two sons. He spent every moment in their presence showing them love and acceptance. Their young princes were dotted on ever since their births, they wanted for nothing. They were always made to feel wanted. A sense of innate yet nurturing compensation on Aemond's part, Rhaena was sure. He went wordlessly about it, but she could surmise that he wished to give his sons everything he did not have in his youth. 

Everything his own father failed to deliver. 

As seen by the flight he'd taken Aemon on, their little boy had loved flying upon Vhagar so much. The experience improved greatly by the fact that Aemond had eagerly taken the time to indulge their son of his own accord. Vhagar was the most magnificent dragon to her young son, his favourite of all that he'd seen in his little life. 

And that was why he'd loved that day more than any other. 

Though it was unfortunate, Rhaena always thought. 

For while she agreed, Vhagar was a magnificent dragon, a relic of times long gone...a living piece of history. But she couldn't help but think that her young Aemon had missed a truly glorious age of dragons, he'd never be able to meet his true Targaryen grandparents or two of his other aunts…the rest of his uncles. He'd never be able to see any of their dragons...Caraxes, Syrax, Vermax, Arrax, Tyraxes, Meleys...so many lost. So many gone...and sometimes four years seemed just long enough to put the darkness behind her, to call it all history so that she might distance herself from the pain of it all.

But other times, it was just too blatant...just too obvious. 

So many members of her family were missing from this current family portrait. The chasms were there, Rhaena’s current life would always lack because of their absence. The vacant holes they'd made upon her person, upon her heart, forever cutting slivers away from her there. No amount of new Targaryen babes could replace them. 

They were all dead and gone...and she was made Queen of the rubble in the aftermath, wed to a kinslayer...the second usurper King. 

What a fate. 

And her little son knew none of it truly. 

"No, mama! I finished, my lessons are all done! Maestwer...um...maestwer Alfa...Alfadwer-" Aemon blurted out his little rambled response, finally recalling that he'd been asked a question nearly ten minutes prior. He'd taken so long, Rhaena's mind had drifted to far darker memories. Though as she'd learned through her experience with motherhood, it didn't do to dwell on such things with children around. They always noticed it...they weren't naive enough to miss it entirely.

"Maester Alfador, you mean," Rhaena gently corrected, smoothing a couple of his curls back behind his ear. 

Aemon was quick to nod eagerly, pointing towards Elaya to add, "yes and...and he told Elaya how papa went out!" 

'Out' was putting it mildly, for while Rhaena knew not the extent of Maester Alfador's knowledge on the matter at hand. She did however know exactly what sent Aemond 'out' of the castle just a few hours ago. As she recalled it, Rhaena had received the order from the Kingsguard guarding her door earlier this morn. 

See, earlier in the morning, before the sun had properly risen. Rhaena had awoken to a rather...regularly expected act, a warm delicious pleasure that crept up between her thighs in long wet languid swipes. The feeling seeped into her peaceful slumber until the aching arousal dragged her back into consciousness. Where she'd awoken to find her husband settled between her legs, his arms tangled around her thighs keeping them spread as he lapped at her quivering wanting cunt. 

Eventful as it was... she'd awoken to many mornings with such activities to pull her from her sleep. Aemond was always eager, he had been ever since he’d stolen her from the Vale and made her his wife. Only now the urges seemed heightened, especially since she began to reciprocate his wantings. The conception of little Daemion was the birth of these feelings...and now the conception of another babe barely a year later had shown the realm and their present court that their union was—mending.

Into what, exactly? 

Something feral and animalistic, surely. A complicated mess of attraction, love and loathing. 

In either case, once Aemond had brought her to the brink of ecstasy itself...he pressed a kiss upon her rounded belly and readied himself for the training yard. From there, she hadn't seen him. Assumably he'd returned to bathe and dress himself again for the early morning council meeting, but she'd fallen back to sleep in-between that time. Only normally, he would have woken her. Normally, they'd have readied for the meeting with his council together...she'd negotiated that right of hers from her husband after the birth of Daemion. As his Queen, she wanted a spot upon his council, to be an active participant in his rule. Time after time, whether it was another one of their vicious volatile arguments between them or an instance of a sweet and tender domesticity as they lazed naked within their bed. Aemond had spent the last two years echoing the sentiment to her, that she was more than just his broodmare. 

And then he did this. 

He removed her from the council this morning. Without even the gall to tell her himself, he left for the meeting without her and then left the information for their guard to relay to her. 

Of course, later upon his return, when Rhaena was properly woken. Bathed and dressed herself in a lovely velvety gown, a dark Targaryen red with intricate black lace linings. With added black lace and sewn jeweled dragons and floral embroidery woven along her bodice and the hem of her skirt. She'd been sat upon her favourite chaise, providing their second son with his early morning feeding.  

That was when Aemond burst through the doors with a look of exhaustion and a need for attention. 

A need she had no intention of abiding by as he sought to exclude her so soundly this morn with no warning once so ever. In all honesty it had tainted the way she'd sweetly awoken in bed with him, as clearly that was more than just his hungered need to taste her first thing in the morn. As it was just as equally his act of service to placate her for what he had planned on doing all along. 

As it happened, Rhaena had burped their babe upon her shoulder, before she swiftly handed him off to Elaya to take to the nursery. It was only once the young wet-nurse had left the room that Aemond moved for Rhaena. Taking long strides to meet her upon the chaise, she'd scoffed at him then, knowing exactly what he wanted. His heated gaze lingered on her still exposed bosom, lustful and wanting...though she was too annoyed with him to indulge him. 

Perky and engorged as they were, she knew he more than likely wished to lay with her. To rest his head upon her swollen breasts as she caressed his hair and allowed him to unwind from his otherwise stressful meeting. And perhaps, had she'd been present for said meeting...or at the very least privy to the information that had been shared or delved into there...she would have sympathized. She would have given him exactly what he wanted, she'd placate him, hold him as he sometimes wishes to be cuddled. 

But no, not then. 

Instead she pulled the buttons of her chemise closed, lifting herself up off of the chaise, she walked around him and made her way to the long ornamented wall-length mirror that stood on the northern side of their chambers. There she stared purposely at her reflection only, working to ignore the way his perplexed expression morphed into one of burning irritation. As Rhaena casually touched up the ends of a few of her long loosening twists, it would soon be time to undo them, free her curls and wash her hair. A task she'd take to later this evening before bed. 

In the moment, however, Rhaena focused on herself. The vast majority of her maternity gowns had elegant buttons upon the front of the gown, made for easier access to nurse her babe at any given time of the day. A stipulation that had always been a part of her marriage, Aemond would have no one but her to nurse their children. 

Though it was in that mirror's reflection that their argument had started. He'd made his way towards her, and she'd turned her dragon's fire directly upon him. Perhaps she'd been warranted in it, that inundated rage of feeling belittled and undermined felt all too consuming for her to ignore in the face of Aemond's condescending rebuttals. That she was apparently in no 'condition' to need to be present for council meetings, that she would be filled in on the most ‘pertinent information’ when needed. 

Perhaps it was her body now, so late in her pregnancy, hormones ran amok fluttering dangerous levels of heightened emotions throughout her. Though even still, she was certain of it. 

He was sidelining her...she could feel it. 

And she didn't know why. 

‘Confinement’ felt like such a half-assed answer. 

He was hiding things from her and yet he still sought rewards for such blatant behaviour. Was it any wonder she denied him those rewards, she was in no mood to lay tangled in bed with him. She was in no mood to allow him to nuzzle his cheek upon her ample chest while he caressed her belly and teased her core with soft presses of his slender fingers. She knew him far too well for that. The progression of him starting off by claiming that he just wished for her to 'set him at ease'. Only, within the hour he'd seduce her to the point of having her gown torn off with his cock working her with rough deep wanting strokes. 

It was something he could never resist, especially when she was this far along with one of her pregnancies. All he wanted was to be inside of her, to feel her heated walls clenched tightly around thick length. His ever constant need to sink into her warmth, soak himself in her wetness. All as he held her tightly against him, nestled between her thighs as he rocked into her with perfect rhythm. Set at a pace of his choosing, with his teeth grazing her neck marking her body. And that ironclad grip of his, enough to set bruises, enough to make her shudder with want…the sort of hold that prevented the mere idea of escape. 

Letting her go...it was never an option, it always seemed a foreign concept to him.  

This would have been no different and seeing as she was cross with him. She chose to stand her ground, to hold fast to her willpower against his handsome seductive charms. It was a hard thing sometimes these days, seeing as her body almost always wanted for him...a true traitor, really. Her body had always betrayed her when it came to him. Ever since her early days, even when she firmed her way through every bedding session. Even the nights she cried through the utter heartbreak of allowing the acts done upon her…in the name of her safety…in the name of her duty. 

It’d been disgusting then, to think that her body had still enjoyed it even when her mind screamed the opposite. The thought of taking in the cock of the man who’d killed her first love, her second love…her grandmother…and then her father. 

Perhaps some days still…she found herself disgusted with herself. Because she didn’t hate it as much as she should anymore…because she’d found her way to enjoying it all. 

Surely the Gods’ frowned upon her. 

Thankfully, though, in that moment, when she denied him she stood by it. And because she stood so harshly against his whims, he stormed out of their rooms. A dark thunderous slam of pent up aggression and building animosity, he needed a different outlet seeing as his preferred choice had repudiated him. And in that knowledge, Rhaena knew well that he'd only ever go to Vhagar next. 

In this world Aemond Targaryen had two sanctuaries. 

Vhagar…and Rhaena, herself. 

And if one would not have him…then he’d storm his way over to the one that would. 

That however, had been several hours ago now. Rhaena had spent the rest of her morning in peace, she'd bathed and dressed Aemon herself. It was a good distraction from her own frustrations. She broke her fast with her young son, watched on as he ate his oats and banana slices messily. Biting back small amused smiles as she corrected his loose hold of his spoon and dabbed a napkin to his grubby mouth. Nibbling on her own custard pastry, delicately sipping her spiced tea in between. Their meal had been nice, they'd spoken about the day's activities her son wished to partake in. The lessons he was most excited to learn about today, as well as his hope to go flying with his father again later in the afternoon. 

Seeing as Morning was still growing, now a much larger beast over the last four years...she was still too small for Rhaena to fly upon herself. Let alone for her to take her son up with her. No, the choices were limited. Aemon could either fly with his father upon Vhagar, with his aunt upon Moondancer, or his uncle upon Sunfyre. As his own little golden hatchling, Golding...was his current name for his bonded beast, the he-dragon was still far too small for him to mount. Though Golding was surely a temporary name as Aemond intended on convincing their son to choose a more suited name for the dragon. But that was a conversation they'd have to shelf for now. Aemon was still a toddler and so he quite enjoyed the name he'd chosen.

In either case, as Aemon's choice for dragons to fly upon was scarce...he would always choose Vhagar first, he was painfully enamoured with every facet of his father. Even the less than savoury parts of him. 

Once Maester Alfador came to fetch Aemon for his lessons to attend with his cousins, Rhaena turned her attention back to her younger son. Playing letter blocks with Daemion, reading to him and singing lullabies as he grew sleepy in her arms. She'd taken him and sat upon the balcony overlooking the courtyard so that her babe could take some sun and fresh air as he slept soundly, there she listened to sounds of the busy castle. The birds chirping in the wind and the distant roars of the dragons near the pits. 

And there she'd thought of Vhagar and her husband. There was so much she still wished to say, so much he'd simply chosen to walk out on just because he could. With the full freedom that came with the title of King...he expressed that power either as intelligently as he wished or as childishly as a man of four and twenty could.

But now with Aemon in her company once again, she'd have to deal with the boy’s father, Aemond later...once he returned from his petulant flight upon Vhagar... she'd deal with him then. 

Returning her focus to her son, she pressed a sweet kiss upon Aemon's forehead. Gazing down into his pale indigo eyes, a mirror of his father's own. In fact, in all honesty…Aemon's entire visage was simply a little mirror to Aemond's own. They shared the same face shape...or at least the pudgy round face Aemond once held in childhood. It was a good indicator for the features their son would one day mature into. The two of them also shared near identical noses and lip shapes. Although, Rhaena's own added genes had ensured that the tip of Aemon's nose was just a tad bit more rounded. His lips more rounded than Aemond's own plush sharp bow-shaped lips. 

It was in the little things, Rhaena supposed. How their son had inherited her curly hair, a pinch of her tawny complexion. Her soft curved eyebrows and her almond shaped eyes. 

Yet still, all in all, their son was the living embodiment of a namesake, one Aemond had purposely bestowed upon their first child. Either to flood his own ego or in a dubious if not blindingly obvious attempt to flaunt his supposed legitimate reign over the one he'd stolen. The one he’d slaughtered in order to usurp the throne.

Though surely the realm was privy to the fact that it was Rhaena's own blood that made their son and the rest of their children so pure, they'd made both a purebred Valyrian heir and a spare for the throne. A union that started with a form of forced coerced duty...now led by something far more complicated. 

Something that existed between the bounds of love and hatred. 

For the moment, Rhaena gave her son leave to return to his toys. He'd want to play with her, but she needed a moment to herself first. She'd only just returned from spending some time with her sister in the gardens, where she'd divulged a splintered version of the events of this morning. Not that it mattered really, Baela may have joined Rhaena in their unified ridiculing of their King. But at the end of the day Baela would remind Rhaena of the same fact she always had, that Aemond Targaryen was a fickle psychotic being…and that she should be careful to never push the bounds and risk her life in the process. 

Because she’d already done so years ago…she’d already made such attempts in the past. And while she still had her life granted to her, she did not walk away the victor in those situations. 

So in that way, her elder sister’s advice had always been sound…but it was hard to swallow at times. Seeing as Rhaena’s forced marriage barely compared to the near bliss Baela was lucky enough to experience with her own spouse. In their case, her union with Aegon was a long time coming, a match Baela had hoped for since she was six and ten. Though it was a shame that just as she'd gotten used to the idea of marrying their sweet and loyal Jace...he'd been plucked from their lives. 

Although Rhaena always supposed that as devastating as his loss was, he was spared in a way. For while he’d come to love his betrothed, his daring Baela…she…she still secretly harboured feelings for the enemy. The night before Viserys had died, Baela had spent one final night with Aegon before he was set to wed Helaena. She'd left that passionate encounter with the settling seed of a man she was most likely to never see again. The Gods, though, they could be funny in that way. Tearing the realm apart, bathing a family in blood and tragedy only for the fates to align yet again. For Baela to finally have Aegon as she once wished, just in time to make her not-so hidden pregnancy legitimate before it was too late. Only now both their hands were tainted. War had taken both Jace and Helaena. War had taken everyone away from the dragon twins except their lone grandsire, Corlys Velaryon and his now legitimized heir Alyn Velaryon. 

*KNOCK, KNOCK...KNOCK* 

The pounding knock at the door drew Rhaena back out of her thoughts once again, she was losing it slowly but surely. She really did need her husband to return, she needed to clear her own mind...she needed to focus on something, anything else. The knock was hard, blunt and formulaic, it could have only belonged to a member of the Kingsguard. So when Rhaena swung the door open to see Ser Willis Fell, she was not surprised to come face to face with his hardened visage. Expressionless as he was, the redheaded man simply stepped aside for a young squire to hold out a silver platter in front of their Queen. 

"For you, my Queen. A raven hath just arrived," the young lanky boy bowed his head, as a sign of sheepish reverence and respect. 

A small scroll. 

A missive.

How odd. 

Tumultuous as this reign had been over the years, at this point in time, nothing beyond yet another rebellion could warrant the urgency of a missive like this.

—

Part 2 coming soon...maybe Friday!

[penkura]

knowing [6/8]

Summary: Sanji knew you were the one the moment he met you.

Pairing: Sanji x Reader

Warnings: None really. Normal One Piece stuff I guess.

Note: Its Whole Cake Island time!! :') This arc made me cry, I really like it at a lot. Sanji finding his raid suit is different than the canon, because I forgot how he found it. :)

[Ch. 1] ● [Ch. 2] ● [Ch. 3] ● [Ch. 4] ● [Ch. 5]

Arriving at Zou with the rest of your crew, you wanted nothing more than to see Sanji, hug Nami, and take a nap on Sunny. Bartolomeo's crew and ship were fine, but they weren't your home or family, it was hard for you to sleep without Sanji nearby and knowing Nami wasn't directing the ship and knew exactly where you were going. A few times you were afraid Bartolomeo's navigator was going to get you all lost on your way but eventually you made it, climbing up after everyone else and sticking close by Robin once you'd made it to the top.

The Minks eventually helped bring you back to everyone else, but Nami hugged you tightly after she'd hugged Luffy, whispering an apology that confused you.

"Nami, what–"

"Sanji's gone, I'm sorry. I couldn't…couldn't stop it."

Your head was starting to spin, you couldn't get any words out. Nami took your hand and dragged you away to the room the Minks had let her stay in, she explained everything.

Capone Bege's crew had shown up saying something about being there to retrieve Sanji, an arranged marriage between him and one of Big Mom's daughters being the cause. Nami told you even Sanji was shocked, but he chose to go with them to settle things and return to you all. He'd told her, Chopper, and Brook he never meant to hide anything from you all, and made her promise to give you a note he'd quickly written, which she did after she finished explaining, hugging you again while you sat frozen in place.

Sanji was being forced into an arranged marriage and you hadn't even been there to go with him or to stop him from going. The way it sounded, he wouldn't have even let you go with him, but you would have fought to do so. But, what did this mean for you two and your relationship? Only three of your crew members knew, what if he decided to stay and marry this girl, to leave you? Zoro and Nami would probably kill him if he did so and broke your heart, but you had faith in Sanji. You were certain he'd return to you, to the Straw Hats in general.

You were his family, not whoever these people who were forcing him into marriage were.

Nami left you alone a few minutes later so you could process what was happening and read the small note from Sanji, even though it ended up making you cry and hate yourself for staying in Dressrosa while he went to Zou.

[Y/N], my love,

I WILL come back to you. I'm not going to marry anyone that ISN'T you, I swear.

+!+

A while later, you heard a knock on the door that woke you from the small nap you'd fallen into. Thinking it was Nami, you didn't bother to check and told whoever it was to come in, being slightly surprised to see it was Zoro.

Not that surprised though, he'd made it clear to everyone, by his actions, that he thought of you like an older sister, and wanted to be sure you were all right.

"You okay? You never came down after Nami."

Sitting up a bit, you nodded and started brushing your fingers through your hair. You didn't want to talk much about the stuff going on with Sanji, but figured Zoro knew that when he came over and sat beside you.

"That idiot cook is in love with you, he's not gonna marry that girl."

"I know that." You passed the note over to Zoro, not caring if he read it. He did so quickly before handing it back to you, making you wonder if he really did read it or if he didn't care enough about Sanji to bother. Zoro, instead, ended up pulling you to him, which made you start to cry again. Not at all his intention, but you were so tired, physically and emotionally, that you couldn't help it. You'd been so looking forward to seeing Sanji, the last two years had been long enough away from him; now he was gone and on his way to try and get out of an arranged marriage, leaving you behind without being able to say anything in person.

Zoro was the only one who knew about Sanji's intentions to marry you. About the ring he'd bought in Dressrosa for you. There was no way he was going to let some stupid arranged marriage keep you two from getting married. Zoro knew that.

"You're going with them. Nami, Luffy, Chopper, and Brook are going after him, they're taking you along."

"O-Okay…" You nodded and sniffled a bit more, trying to calm yourself so you could go back to everyone. You could hear what sounded like a party going on, probably thanks to Luffy making friends with the Minks. "What a-about you?"

"I'm going on to Wano. You show up without that curly brow and I'm going to find him and kill him."

"Zoro, you can't just kill him."

"He hurts you and I will."

"Oh my gosh, you're the worst brother ever."

+!+

The next morning, your group split off from Zoro's group to head for Whole Cake Island. You thought the name sounded funny, but also were worried about entering the territory of one of the Four Emperors of the Sea. You'd heard Big Mom could be fearsome, and were terrified of meeting any of her numerous children for the same potential reason.

When you landed there finally, sticky from syrup rain and tired, you had no time to rest as Luffy and Chopper ended up eating an entire chocolate building, completely horrifying you as what appeared to be the police of the area appeared and were chastising them, until a girl with brown hair in pigtails showed up and played along that she'd asked them to do so.

She took you all to another building, introducing herself as Charlotte Pudding, the girl Sanji was supposed to marry in a few short days. Hearing her talk about him and how kind he was made you grip the hem of your dress tightly, biting your tongue until it hurt. You didn't want to feel jealous, Sanji's was yours, but you couldn't help it.

Pudding was pretty and perfect, and seemed more like Sanji's type than you. You wouldn't blame him if he agreed to marry her, but you knew he wouldn't. He'd never leave you after the amount of time you'd been together and how much you loved each other.

He…he wouldn't…right?

"He said he'd marry me if he could, but he wanted to return to his crew, and there was someone else he'd given his heart to."

While everyone else was shocked Sanji turned down a girl, Nami glanced over and caught you gritting your teeth, your lips pressed in a thin line. She knew you and Sanji were together, you'd told her and Robin after the events at Water Seven, and she hated seeing you this way. So worried and jealous at the same time. You should have been relieved to hear he told Pudding you had his heart, but it just scared you for some reason. Like it would be used by Big Mom or one of her numerous other kids as a way to hurt Sanji more than hurt you.

Nami reached over quietly and grabbed your hand under the table, squeezing it to let you know she was there. You gave her a small smile, which she knew was fake.

Once Pudding gave you all directions to the Seducing Woods and you were on your way, you stayed out on Sunny's deck, just watching the cotton candy clouds roll by.

"It's kind of pretty here." Nami hadn't startled you, you nodded at her when she spoke and came to stand beside you. "You've been lost in thought for a good while. Care to share?"

Shaking your head, you continued to stare at the sky, wishing none of this was happening.

"Hey, it's going to be alright. We'll get Sanji back and you two can go back to being grossly cute and in love with each other."

"What if he changes his mind?"

"Hm?"

"What if he changes his mind and decides he wants to marry Pudding? She's so pretty, how do I compete with the daughter of Big Mom?"

Rolling her eyes, Nami sighed and hugged you a bit. Of course you'd feel insecure about everything happening, Pudding really was pretty, but Nami knew that didn't matter to Sanji when it came to you. He'd always thought you were the most beautiful girl he'd ever met, but actually getting to know you over time, he'd told Nami he fell head over heels for your personality and your soul, your looks were secondary to everything else. Sanji loved you because of who you were, not what you looked like, despite his initial attraction to you being based on looks.

"You're not gonna compete with her. She said she wasn't going to marry him, right?"

"Yeah, but–"

"No buts, she said it's not happening. So unless she's lied to us, your relationship with Sanji will be fine. We'll get him back, don't worry."

You hugged Nami back and agreed with her, but still had a feeling of fear and worry in your heart. Nothing was right about all of this, you just had a feeling that something was wrong, but you weren't sure what it was. You didn't want to find out, you hoped your instincts were wrong, that the fear and worry would go away after a bit more information came to you.

You hoped for it, but also accepted that it was likely not going to happen.

+!+

"Sanji!!! Hey!!"

After being tricked by Pudding to the Seducing Woods, Luffy fought against one of the Sweet Generals, Charlotte Cracker, through the night. It took hours after you were separated from Brook, Chopper, Carrot, and Pedro, you and Nami safely atop one of the Homies thanks to Lola's piece of Big Mom's vivre card. Once he'd finally defeated him, the Homie you were on carried the three of you towards Totto Land, and you'd made it just in time to catch the carriage taking Sanji and his family to the castle.

But the look Sanji gave when he saw Luffy, then Nami, then you, you'd never seen such a horrified look on his face. Luffy flung himself to the carriage, catching Sanji up on everything that had happened since he was taken by Bege's crew, and you had some hope it'd bring him back to you all.

Until Sanji kicked Luffy from the carriage.

"Get lost…you miserable, inferior pirates!"

Your heart clenched, and you barely strained out his name.

"My name…is Vinsmoke Sanji."

A last name. You'd never known. Anytime you asked Sanji about his family or where he was from, he'd smile sweetly and tell you he wasn't at a point where he could talk about it yet. You accepted that answer, not wanting to push him into something he wasn't comfortable doing or talking about. You always figured you two would sit together one day when he was ready and he'd tell you everything. Never did you expect or want to find out this way.

"And I'm…a prince of Germa Kingdom!! Forgive me for hiding this from you!"

Please, [Y/N], I didn't want you to find out this way.

"Sanji, please." You stepped forward a bit, wanting him to stop and just come with you all.

I didn't need to know!

"If I had told you, it would only have made you self-conscious. The difference in status between us is obvious. Here, I have all the money, soldiers, and servants I can use!"

This isn't you. What have they done to you in a matter of days?

You hated it, every bit of it. This wasn't the Sanji you knew, it wasn't him at all. He never cared about money or anything like that. He'd always told you his past didn't matter, because all he could see was a future with you and the Straw Hats. Something had happened, in the few days you'd been apart, that changed the sweet, loving man you knew. What it was, you didn't know, you just knew something was wrong.

"If my choice is between returning to you and your chuckle-headed crewmates, and living in luxury here with Big Mom's beautiful daughter as my wife…which do you think will make me happier?!"

Nami was angry on your behalf, on the behalf of Luffy as well. For Luffy, because he'd been the one to recruit Sanji and convince him to go with you all.

For you because of your relationship with him, and the insecurity you'd felt after meeting Pudding. Your face was blank, but the tears welling up in your eyes made her even angrier.

"There's no comparison! Stop taking that letter seriously! I'm not going back!!"

Just leave, please! I can't have your blood on my hands!

You didn't want to hear another word, you actually wanted to take Luffy and Nami, leave and forget about this whole retrieval mission. At least, you thought you did, until the next thing Sanji said.

"I don't even know if you really can become king of the Pirates! I'm through playing pirate with your rag-tag crew," Sanji looked over at you, trying his hardest not to flee the carriage and pull you to him, he had to do something to keep you safe and even hated the next words out of his own mouth, "and I'm tired of playing romance, we're done."

"Sanji!!"

Luffy took it upon himself, of course, to try and fight Sanji to force him back. You stayed with Nami, Sanji's words replaying over and over in your head. You barely paid attention to the fight, even after Sanji returned to the carriage and Luffy yelled out to him that he'd never eat anyone else's food because Sanji was his chef, how he couldn't become king of the Pirates without him.

You felt a rush of adrenaline and ran up beside your captain who had just fallen to the ground, and took your turn shouting at the departing carriage.

"Sanji!!! I don't care what you said, I love you! You know I do!! I know we weren't just playing romance! I'll wait for you to come back too!!"

You didn't know if he actually heard you, but you hoped and prayed he did, while you collapsed by Luffy, the exhaustion of the last two days hitting you finally, along with the aching in your heart.

+!+

"Playing romance?? Is that what you've been doing as a pirate? Ha!" Yonji laughed at your shouted confession, while Sanji continued to cry over everything that had happened.

Luffy was determined to get him back, despite the fact he'd tried to drive him off, forcing you all to leave.

Nami slapped him which he knew he deserved, he'd hurt his closest friends and the pain from that was far worse than her slap.

And then you. You, his sweet, kind, patient, loving girlfriend, how could he do that to you, of all people? He was certain his family didn't know whether he looked at you or Nami, but when he locked eyes with you, the tears starting down your face as he just broke up with you, claiming it was just playing romance when he'd never do such a thing to you, it hurt him worse than anything else that had just happened.

Your yelling didn't help, he'd heard every word. You revealed your relationship on purpose so he knew you still loved him.

He didn't know how you could, of course feelings won't go away that quickly. Every day you'd tell him you loved him with a smile, sometimes that you hoped you'd have the chance to get married one day.

Sanji never understood why you truly loved him, why you wanted to marry him. He always refused to tell you about his horrendous family life growing up, but you always accepted it and said he could whenever he was ready. He told you he loved you first, and was surprised when you cried and told him the same, throwing your arms around him and kissing him.

He didn't deserve you, he knew that. He didn't deserve to have his thoughts be about marrying you, his late night wonderings about what your kids would look like. No, Sanji believed that now, he didn't deserve a life with you. Now you could go find someone who did deserve you, you weren't tied to him anymore. Maybe if you'd all go to Wano, you'd meet someone else, or even fall for Law or hell, he'd even expect Usopp.

Whatever was next, he thought you'd be better off without him.

She deserves better than a failure like me anyway.

+!+

"I can't believe you're letting him go like that." Nami tried to be angry as she sat beside you and Luffy, but she was struggling to even pretend. That bout he and Sanji just had was enough to cause her to slap the blond, out of frustration for Luffy and you. It didn't make her feel any better, but she thought maybe it would help you a little.

"I can't be mad at him." You admitted quietly, pulling your knees to your chest and setting your chin on them. "Could you see it? Did you hear his voice?"

"Of course I did! He just insulted Luffy and broke up with you in front of everyone that was here!"

"He's not doing it because he wants to!"

Nami was a bit surprised you shouted, but Luffy wasn't. He'd noticed the same as you did, the way Sanji looked at him in feign hatred that was really shock you'd all shown up, the way his voice wasn't normal, it almost quivered as he stated he'd become tired of playing romance with you and he'd chosen to quit being a pirate and accept his royal heritage.

"Everything was a lie, Nami! Everything that just happened, he doesn't want to do this to us!" You had hoped the syrupy rain would cover your tears, and it did, until you choked out a sob. "He's trying to protect us, I get that! It does hurt like hell to hear him say what he did, but…but he's keeping us safe as best he can."

Nami quickly moved over and hugged you tightly, apologizing for being upset about what had just happened. She knew that you knew Sanji better than any of them at this point, and your relationship may have been revealed to Luffy in a way you didn't want, but she was sure you and Sanji, if you could get him out of this arranged marriage, would be okay.

On the other hand, Luffy laughed a bit, giving you a big smile. "You're right! We'll get him back, and you guys can get married instead!"

"Sorry you found out this way, Luffy."

Shaking his head, Luffy just grinned with a giggle. "Don't worry about it. If you guys are happy, that's all good! You guys gotta get married on Sunny though!"

"If he ever wants to even think about marriage after this, I'd be glad to." Laughing as well, you knew it wouldn't be long before someone from Big Mom's castle came to capture you, and you would accept that for now. It might place you closer to Sanji in the end, for all you knew.

Luffy would rescue him, he just had to.

+!+

"That sneaky, conniving, little bi–"

"Hey, watch your language!"

Nami couldn't believe how angry you were, she'd never seen you so ready to harm yourself in order to get to someone else. Of course, the fact that Pudding just told the three of you the true intentions of this wedding, that she was going to be killing Sanji tomorrow, didn't help at all. You were struggling to get free from the nail-like candy trapping you in a cell, just as Luffy was though he was twisting himself to a point you feared he'd never come back from. Your anger was too much, you rarely ever swore and now Nami had heard you call Pudding and the rest of the Charlotte family a colorful array of names in about thirty seconds.

"How dare they! They think they're gonna kill the love of my life and get away with it?!"

"What about his family?"

"I don't care about them!!"

"You're gonna be a great daughter-in-law."

You stopped your attempts to escape and sent Nami a slight side eye, which made her roll her eyes. You'd never do anything to her, and she understood you didn't seem to be a fan of your possible future in-laws, but you really needed to calm down before the jailer caught wind of what you and Luffy were doing.

You hated how weak you felt, especially when Opera went to take Nami to get Lola's location out of her, but you were beyond glad when Jimbei showed up and freed the three of you, before you or Luffy could hurt yourselves further.

You followed your captain into the castle to try and find Sanji, but found yourselves pulled into another room and face to face with his sister, Reiju. Once she informed you that Sanji knew the truth about the next day, Luffy thanked her and jumped out a window to go to the spot he promised Sanji he'd be waiting at, but you stayed behind.

You really wanted to talk with Reiju.

"And you are? I know you were on the ship when I saved your captain."

"I'm [Y/N], I'm Sanji's girl–" you had to stop yourself, biting your lip and shaking your head. "I'm a member of the Straw Hats like Sanji."

You two were technically broken up at the moment, whether you accepted that or not. It felt like you couldn't call yourself his girlfriend right now, no matter how much it hurt your heart to stop yourself.

"Oooh, I see," Reiju smiled a bit at you, and you started to calm down. "You're the girl he told me about."

"He-He did?"

She nodded, still smiling at you. Once they had discussed the assassination plot, Sanji ended up telling Reiju a bit about you, and how he felt like garbage for breaking up with you the way he did, where he did. He'd even admitted he wouldn't blame you if you didn't take him back after all of this. He thought he was completely unworthy of your love now, you'd never take a failure like him back, and he just somehow knew he didn't deserve your forgiveness or love.

You deserved better than him, in Sanji's mind.

"He did, probably not everything but some things. Said you were the prettiest girl he'd ever met, and he was so in love with you."

Your heart clenched and you reached up to grip the necklace he'd found and bought for you in Water Seven. The little silver heart still made you happy anytime you looked at it.

"He hates what he did to you, and hoped that you'd take him back if he got to return." Reiju's smile softened as you started to cry, both hands tightly wrapped around your necklace now. "He thinks he should die with us tomorrow, but you need to help your captain get him out of here. The bracelets he's wearing are duds, he'll be fine if you leave with him."

"I…I'm so glad!" Your sobs were silent this time, while you started to smile so no one got suspicious of who was with Reiju. "The thought of Sanji marrying someone else has made me so sick to my stomach! But…just knowing he still loves me…is more than enough for the moment!"

You really did believe what you told Nami, that Sanji did what he had to in order to protect you guys and Zeff, to keep you from coming after him, but a part of you feared it was all genuine. That he didn't love you anymore, he didn't want to be a pirate or a cook anymore. It was just a small, nagging fear in the back of your mind, but now it had been squashed. You were no longer afraid or worried he had fallen out of love with you, cooking, or the sea.

He was still Sanji. Nothing had changed.

You thanked Reiju for the information, deciding to go find Nami again and leave the castle, when she stopped you and asked if you wanted to know about their childhood, how Sanji ended up in the East Blue, and about their mother.

Truthfully, you desperately did want to know, but you shook your head at her offer with a small smile.

"Sanji will tell me when he's ready."

+!+

You did find Nami and Jimbei, joining them in fighting to get out of the castle before you were dragged into the Mirro-world by Chopper and Carrot. Pedro was back with you as well, and you didn't fully understand why Big Mom's daughter Brulee or this guy named Diesel were with you, but if it helped you accomplish your goals, you figured it was ok. Your next task was to find Brook, and you did, nestled in Big Mom's arms as she slept, treating him like a stuffed animal. A few rescue attempts later you had him back, and he'd even gotten a copy of her Poneglyphs for Robin to read later.

Once you were all together, the only ones you needed were Luffy and Sanji, and you were lucky enough to find shards of the mirror that was destroyed in the place Luffy said he would stay. You were all able to get into contact with the two, everyone else cheering that Sanji was back while you held back your tears when he said your name, asking if you were there and all right.

"I'm here. I'm okay, don't worry."

"Oh, mon amour, I'm so, so sorry, I–"

"Sanji, we'll talk later. For now…leave things as they are. We have other things to do."

Hearing his soft agreement hurt you a bit, but you couldn't have such a talk with everyone else around. Not now, not here. Chopper and Brook asked you what was going on as you all headed for Capone Bege's place, and all you told them was that you and Sanji had been dating for a couple years, but were broken up for the moment due to the circumstances. They were both shocked you'd keep such a relationship secret, but also sad for the two of you to be in the situation you were in. You were certain everything would be alright once this wedding was stopped, once the assassination plot was ended, but until then, you'd keep your relationship status as broken up, despite the thought hurting you even more.

+!+

Upon arrival at Bege's place, you, Nami, and Carrot went off to take a much needed bath, Nami speaking and connecting with Chiffon thanks to her having been friends with Lola for the time you all were at Thriller Bark. Carrot was enjoying the bath greatly, and you were glad to be able to wash away the gross feelings of the last two days, but you weren't really looking forward to seeing Sanji yet. You wanted to hide in the bath the whole time, making Carrot nervous as you sunk down further, letting the water come up to your nose so you could still breathe. Nami wasn't that concerned, she knew you were still upset but you weren't going to do anything to yourself. You'd be fine after some time, once you and Sanji could actually talk.

You did eventually leave the bath, changing into the [f/c] dress that Chiffon had left for you. It hit about your knees and had long sleeves, but you did think it was a nice dress for the time being.

When you were on your way to the room Chiffon said this brief alliance discussion would be taking place in, you caught sight of Sanji about to go into the room himself, before he saw you. His eyes lit up and he told Luffy to go without him, turning and walking towards you, hoping you'd let him explain quickly.

"[Y/N]. I've missed you so much." You let Sanji hug you, returning it tightly and saying the same thing. It'd been far too long, you two hadn't truly been around each other since your arrival in Dressrosa,  and that was a few weeks ago now.

You really had missed him.

Releasing you, Sanji took your face in his hands and placed his forehead against yours, making you start to tear up just because you had missed him terribly the last few days, you missed being so close to him, missed just holding his hands and talking to him, and were glad he was in front of you again.

"I'm so, so sorry. I didn't…I never wanted…"

"I know. It's okay, I understand, you were trying to protect us."

"It doesn't justify what I said to you," he shook his head, making sure you were looking him in the eyes so you knew he wasn't lying, "It's not just playing romance with you, you know that, right? You know I'm serious about us."

You nod, removing his hands from your face to just hold them, staying as close as you can be without hugging. "I know, but it's okay for the moment. We don't have the time to talk about this, but, once we're back on Sunny, we should sit and talk, all right?"

Nodding, Sanji agreed with you. There was no time to work this out right then, so you'd have to put it on the back burner and wait for now. Wait until this sham wedding was stopped, Big Mom would potentially be assassinated, and Sanji would be free from having to deal with his family ever again. You'd make sure they stayed away, even if it killed you.

"I love you. Only you, now and always."

"I love you too, Sanji."

Everything would be okay. Just a bit longer, and you'd all be back on Sunny and heading for Wano.

+!+

The assassination plot against Big Mom had failed, but so had hers against the Vinsmoke family, she was never going to have the technology from Germa now. Once the wedding cake had been ruined, her hunger pangs began and she started a rampage, but by then, you all had moved back to the Seducing Woods where Sunny was waiting, this time with Sanji alongside you. He'd rescued his family, before disowning his father who accepted that to your shock, and now he was wondering why you kept giving him odd looks.

"What's up?"

You just kind of looked him over, making him slightly nervous before you shrugged with a slight frown.

"You look better in black. White doesn't suit you as well."

"That…THAT'S IT?!" Sanji was only shocked for a moment before you giggled, saying he still looked handsome but black was definitely more his color. He'd thought something was wrong! It made him glad to hear that the 'problem' was just the color suit he'd been forced to wear.

You all were interrupted by a flying carpet carrying Chiffon and Pudding, the latter of the two wanting Sanji to go with them to make a cake that could satisfy Big Mom's cravings, even though she kept switching between seeming lovestruck by Sanji and wanting to kill him still. Despite your comment and reiterating of love for each other, you two hadn't properly reconciled your relationship, so for the moment, you were willing to let Sanji go if it meant stopping Big Mom's rampage.

Sanji, though, wasn't so keen on the idea of leaving you again, even though you would be with the rest of your crew, but you promised him you'd be fine. You knew how to fight, you'd throw a few shuriken and some kunai with trip wire or paper bombs to stop whoever came after you all. He gave you the quickest hug, holding your hand while he promised he'd be back as soon as possible, making you laugh.

"You'd better not be lying to me."

"Never in a million years, mon amour."

You barely took notice of the way Pudding looked at you until Sanji joined her and Chiffon on the flying carpet. She was looking at you like she knew, the entire time, that you were the one he'd told her he'd given his heart too. You never confirmed or denied it when you spoke with her the first time, but it seemed like she could tell. You didn't say a word to her, just nodded and followed everyone else back to Sunny.

You felt you could trust Pudding for now.

+!+

Luffy had disappeared into the Mirro-world with another of Big Mom's children, Katakuri, and you could assume a fight had taken place. Sanji had left with Chiffon and Pudding to recreate the wedding cake to stop Big Mom from rampaging through her own kingdom.

The rest of you had been able to get on board Sunny and away from the shore, now just trying to stay away from anyone that came towards you as you attempted to reach Cacao Island to reunite with your missing captain and chef. It took longer than you personally liked, and Big Mom had attacked Sunny as you all went on, Nami being the one to temporarily stop her by discharging lightning from a cloud Homie named Zeus, who she promptly captured as her own.

You'd all made it to Cacao Island in time for Sanji and Luffy to almost be thrown to the ship, making your getaway surprisingly with the help of the Germa fleet to keep Big Mom's fleet of ships from you.

It'd been a while since you were able to successfully escape from Big Mom and Totto Land, you sat relieved on the Sunny's deck, thankful to be on the way to Wano and to have Sanji back finally.

Luffy was laid out on the deck too, his stomach started growling after a bit which made you laugh.

"Hey uh," it was weird to hear Sanji sound so unsure as he spoke, but still it made you smile, "I could…make you a meal?"

He didn't have a chance to run before Luffy, Brook, Chopper, and Carrot were nearly mauling him at the thought of having his cooking, making Sanji ask if you all had eaten while he'd been gone. All of you followed him to the kitchen where he prepared food for you, making you the happiest by seeing him in his element, doing what he loved.

Of course, you two would need to sit and talk, but you'd already asked Nami to place you on the first night watch so you and Sanji could have a talk uninterrupted.

Once you finished eating, you quietly snuck out to go to the crow's nest and wait. You were sure Sanji would want to clean the kitchen and wash the dishes before he even thought about bed, so you had time to think about what you wanted to say.

Sanji noticed you were gone not even five minutes later, hoping you still weren't upset over everything that had happened.

"Where–"

"She's on the first night watch," Nami smiled at Sanji when she knew what he was about to ask, "She said she'll be waiting for you."

Nodding, Sanji turned back to the stove to finish the next batch of food Luffy had asked for. He'd definitely join you once he was done, but he'd worry and stress over what to say, how to explain himself if you'd let him until then. He prayed you'd take him back, that you wouldn't still be upset with him. He'd tell you everything, no matter how much it hurt him personally, you deserved to know what you'd gotten into with him.

Please….please just accept me still.

+!+

The sound of the hatch to the crow's nest opening woke you from your light nap, you quickly rubbed your eyes before looking to see who it was, grinning when you saw exactly who you'd been waiting for.

"Sanji!" He barely entered the room before you'd jumped up from your spot, fully awake now, and threw your arms around him, kissing his face while he tried to keep from falling with you.

"Hey, hey, calm down! You're gonna drag us to the floor!"

"Who cares?!"

He was able to stay upright with you holding onto him, setting you down after a moment. You smiled and once he'd closed the hatch, you dragged him over the bench with you, making him sit right next to you while you held his hand. There was no way you were letting him go again, not until you got to Wano at least. You also didn't want this conversation to last too long, you were sure he wanted to get out of that white wedding suit as soon as possible.

You were both quiet for a while, neither of you sure where to start, but you decided to break the ice by leaning closer and kissing Sanji on the cheek with a smile.

"I love you."

"How could you still love me after all of this?"

Humming a bit, you furrowed your brow seeing Sanji wouldn't look at you. He'd told you he loved you just the night before at Bege's castle, and you responded the same. Did he think you'd really stop loving him simply because of his family, because of this arranged marriage crap? All in a matter of a day?

"Sanji," you held his hand tighter, using your free one to make him look at you, smiling softly at him, "none of it was your fault."

"Of course it–"

"No, listen to me. Nothing that happened the last few days was your fault. You were being used by people who don't care about you like we do," you stopped to kiss him briefly, which caused Sanji to hug you so tightly, "they don't love you like I do especially. Nothing could stop me from loving you, Sanji."

Sanji severely did not want to start crying to you, he didn't want you to feel any kind of pity for him. You never would, he knew that, but it was just a small fear. He still was determined to tell you about his childhood, hoping you'd still want to be with him after you heard everything, after you learned how he ended up in the East Blue and working with Zeff at the Baratie.

But he knew deep down that you'd never leave him just because of what he was subjected to. You might want to go back and kill his brothers but you wouldn't leave him.

"I love you. I love you so, so damn much."

You hummed lightly with a soft smile, hugging him tighter and kissing the top of his head. "I love you too, Sanji; so much more than you'll ever know."

Sanji fully believed you. He knew you loved him and wouldn't leave him. You'd stay with him and continue to help him move on from his past, continuing to help him heal and plan a life with you instead.

He hoped you'd like that idea.

+!+

"Sanji, what do you want to do with this suit?"

"Burn it for all I care."

You laughed, halfway expecting that answer while Sanji got ready for the day. You two had spent your entire night watch talking, he'd told you all about his childhood and apologized too many times for your liking, but it all ended up all right in the end. When Nami came in to take over, you'd both fallen asleep and if Zoro was there, he and Sanji would be having an argument, but since it was Nami, she gently woke you both and told you to go downstairs and sleep. Sanji ended up picking you up bridal style once you two had made it down to the deck, making you giggle and hug him around his neck. You kicked your legs like a child and while he smiled, Sanji told you to be careful so he didn't drop you, but you knew he'd never. He had taken you to the women's bunks and was going to leave you in your bed to go to his own, but you grabbed him before he could go anyway and asked him to stay, which he gladly did so.

Now you were getting ready to continue onward to Wano, and you just wanted to know what to do with the suit he'd worn the day before. There really wasn't anything wrong with it, apart from the memories that would be attached to it and the fact you had said he looked better in black, Sanji didn't want to keep it at all.

You dug through the pockets to make sure he hadn't left his lighter or anything in them, before finding a strange black item with a 3 on it.

"What's this?"

"Hmm?"

Eyes widening at the item in your hands, Sanji stopped brushing his teeth and almost choked on the toothpaste in his mouth before spitting it out and snatching the item from your hands.

"How the hell did this get here?"

He didn't tell you a thing and started walking out to the deck, leaving you to follow.

"Sanji, wait! What is it??"

"Trash is what it is!"

Luffy and the others were on the deck as you two walked out, and when he saw the item in Sanji's hand he used his Gum Gum powers to stretch out and take it.

"Is this a raid suit like what your family had?!"

"A raid suit?!" Chopper's eyes lit up into stars, and he and Luffy started begging Sanji to try the raid suit, but he adamantly refused. He figured that his brother Niji must've been the one to give him the suit, saying he was the only one to actually have contact with him and Luffy when they were escaping Totto Land. Luffy and Chopper continued to whine and beg Sanji to try the raid suit, the two wanted to see what cool transformation would happen, but Sanji absolutely did not want to have anything to do with Germa's science.

"You might be able to shoot lasers!!!"

"Look, we don't need another person that can shoot lasers! It's enough that we've got Franky! I don't want that Germa science near me! In fact," he gave them both a small glare, "Don't ever say the words Vinsmoke or Germa around me! Both are forbidden!"

While the two whined, Nami brought up how she uses science herself, showing off Zeus who had made his new home in her climate baton, having chosen food over loyalty, when Carrot jumped down with the latest Coo News.

"It says here that Luffy, Sanji, Jimbei, and Bege attempted to assassinate Big Mom, and that Luffy was the ringleader!" She flipped the pages and a few bounty posters fell out when she did so. "Oh, new bounty posters."

You and Sanji both caught sight of one of them, you were excited and he was surprised.

"Ah!"

"Your bounty went up, Sanji!!"

You were so happy for him that you couldn't help it, you threw your arms around his neck laughing! No point in hiding your relationship now, not after a shouted confession and having to explain the situation to Chopper and Brook. The only ones who didn't know yet were Usopp and Franky, and you intended to tell them as soon as you met up with them in Wano.

"It's 330 million berries! Wait, what's the moss head's bounty?!"

"I believe," Brook answered before anyone else had the chance to,  "it's 320 million."

"Yes! In your face, moss head!!" Sanji grinned and finally hugged you back, twirling just a bit with you, asking if you were proud of your super awesome boyfriend who had a higher bounty than Zoro. All you did was laugh and nod, you truly were proud of him!

"Oh hey," Chopper held another bounty poster in his hands and held it up to the two of you, "[Y/N]'s bounty went up to! It's 120 million now!"

"What?!" Your face went red as you took the poster from Chopper, absolutely shocked yours went up at all. You didn't think you'd been mentioned in the article, so you didn't expect this! "Why did mine double?!"

"Who cares, you should be proud!" Taking your face in his hands, Sanji kept smiling with heart eyes and rubbed his nose and cheek against your own. "My beautiful girlfriend is so strong!! I'm so proud of you!!"

"Sanji!!" You blushed even worse, not used to being able to show affection so openly, but you'd get over it at some point.

"Ah young love, yohohoho!"

You ignored Brook while Sanji got another look at his poster, instantly becoming depressed when he realized his bounty likely only went up because of his family and Germa, due to it having his last name on it.

Carrot brought the paper over to you, telling you to check the article again. Doing so, you read through and your face went pale reading a few sentences stuck in the middle.

"'The assassination plot was aided by another Straw Hat pirate member, by the name of [L/N] [Y/N], a young kunoichi from Yume Village, an offshoot of Wano. She's believed to be in a relationship with Vinsmoke Sanji.' I…are you freaking kidding me?!"

Instead of being depressed you became angry, realizing it was most likely because of your relationship that your bounty went up, not really because of anything you did. You almost wanted to hide the rest of the day, but decided it wasn't worth it in the end. Your bounty had increased, your relationship was out in the world, you'd just have to accept it.

Luffy became depressed himself, reading his new poster and believing it said his bounty had dropped to 1.5 million berries, before Brook read it aloud and corrected him.

"Your bounty isn't 1.5 million berries. It's 1.5 billion berries!!"

"WHAT???!"

Everyone was so shocked, you had to read the poster for yourselves, to make sure it was accurate, and it was! Luffy had such a high bounty now, you all were excited for him; you personally were a little concerned, but Luffy was strong so everything would be all right!

Instead of there being any kind of concern, Luffy laughed and was glad his bounty hadn't gone down. Nami nearly smacked him on the head for being so nonchalant about it, before Sanji suggested he could start on breakfast, which everyone agreed to.

"Let me help you!"

You grabbed Sanji's hand before he could step away, and he gladly agreed to let you help him make breakfast. He placed you on your usual task of chopping vegetables for the omelets that he'd decided would be perfect to start the day with. It was quiet for a while, both of you focused and working on your tasks, Luffy coming in every few minutes to ask when breakfast would be ready before Sanji kicked him out and told him soon. The last time it happened, before even turning back to his own work, Sanji stopped and hugged you from behind, making you giggle.

"I love you, [Y/N]."

"I love you too, Sanji!"

I'm gonna marry you one day, I swear it.