#one day i WILL make that video essay and then you'll see. you will all see

[fruitsofhell]

My other fun addition to the Hbomberguy video stuff is not just that you need to start checking everyone's sources just to make sure you aren't being duped, but to not use them as a stand in for media consumption/experiences either. Like I'm not gonna lecture you on reading sources cause I am the first one to not and that's my laziness, but like sometimes more important than checking the original analysis of something is just to... see tge thing being analyzed yourself. That's not even about misinformation or lying, sometimes people's opinions just SUCK ASS.

Like there are youtube video essayists I overall kinda respect but they have dogshit opinions on things. I used to love Jack Saint's bad faith overly critical analyses of throwaway kids films, until I realized he also saw films that in my opinion had a lot of merit, and it turned me off from him. Big Joel is cool as hell, but anytime he gives his opinion on animation save like a few points, I completely glaze over and find him annoying. The other day I watched a video essay about the "Magical Negro" trope, and the first movie sourced interested me, so I watched it and I hardly understand why they put that in, it framed the movie as something it wasn't.

Just in general, it's good practice to make sure your opinions on media are your own and experience it yourself. MY biggest takeaway from the Hbomn video wasn't to throw rocks at Somerton or start obsessively fact-checking every essayist I watch, but to make sure I have a baseline of what they talking about myself and not letting anyone throw around media examples without reckless abandon. The Celluloid Closet and Tinkerbelles and Evil Queens is on my watxh/read list now, but the first thing I did from the words he stole from Celluoid Closet was watch Rebels Without A Cause out of curiosity of this gay subtext in a 50s blockbuster. And it was a super interesting experience that has given me my own unrelated opinions. Not to discount whatever important queer reading and historical importance the film has, but I'm happy I also have more than just that cause I Watched It Myself, not someone's specific and unavoidably biased reading of it.

The video isn't about cultivating suspicion but cultivating appreciation for the skills of analytical/informative/opinion writing. So even when people aren't being lying grifters, it's just good to be your own critic and media analyst. Maybe you'll even contribute to that world yourself, or maybe you'll keep all your cool opinions in your heart and die, who cares. The point is that unlike some people, your opinions and words are your own. It's a beautiful thing to have your own creative voice.

[autumnsxxangel]

SandRay are an homage to Wong Kar-Wai's Happy Together and in this essay I will..

...actually explain it because I see people catching his homage's to Western queer media, but not really his shout outs to Eastern queer media.

I assumed there would be allusions to Happy Together when I first saw the trailer, but this last episode centered around Ray really cemented it for me. After all, why would P'Jojo reference all these Western queer shows and not talk about what is probably the most iconic piece of Eastern queer media ever?

Wong Kar-Wai & Happy Together

For some background information, Wong Kar-Wai is a famous and insanely influential Hong Kong filmmaker. If you're a film nerd, you probably know who he is and recognize his style. If you like film and metas, I would recommend watching some of his stuff because afterwards, you'll realize just how much influence he still has on modern media, especially in Asia. Stylistically, he's known for rich color grading; thematic usage of music; an unending sense of nostalgia, heartbreak, and missed opportunities; and dialogue that mean nothing on the surface because everything meaningful is boiling just under, left unsaid (If you've watched Everything Everywhere, All At Once, the entire actress universe sequence was an homage to Wong Kar-Wai). His actors always do a phenomenal job because so much of what they need to portray can't be communicated through words. It makes sense why SandRay, aka FirstKhao, were chosen to represent Happy Together as they are the strongest actors out of the group.

Happy Together, simply summarized, is about two men, Ho Po-Wing and Lai Yiu-Fai, who are in a very tumultuous relationship. They end up in Argentina because they wanted to visit the waterfall that's on a lamp that they own. They get lost, end up using all their money, and have to figure out a way to get back to Hong Kong. While there, they break up, get back together, and break up again.

The movie was released in 1997 and is still ranked as one of the best queer movies of all time. The two main characters are played by Tony Leung and Leslie Cheung. You might recognize Tony Leung as Simu Liu's dad in Shang-Chi. Leslie Cheung was in Farewell, My Concubine, and was famously a bisexual man with a long term male partner. This is significant because it was virtually unheard of to be out and open at that time (he made his relationship public in 1997 though he had mentioned bisexuality in earlier years), especially in Hong Kong which was, and still is, very homophobic. Leslie received a lot of hate for his sexuality and androgyny. (If you're interested in learning more about Leslie as a queer Asian figure, this is a good video essay that goes over his work and his life).

Sand as Lai Yiu-Fai

Fai's, and in turn Sand's, character can be summed up by one line, "One thing I never told Ho Po-Wing was that I didn't want him to recover so fast. Those were our happiest days."

Both Fai and Sand are very static, straightforward characters. They stay above board for the most part and work a variety of jobs to survive. They have their morals about what is right and wrong, which unfortunately is both of their downfalls.

In Happy Together, Wing breaks up with Fai because he is bored with the relationship. He basically says, "I'm bored being with you. Let's break up. If we happen to meet again, we can try again." Then he leaves Fai stranded on the side of a highway.

Later, he reappears in Fai's life. The first encounter is a fight, much like Sand and Ray's first meeting in the bathroom. The second encounter is because Wing gets beaten up. He goes to Fai because he knows Fai will feel obligated to take care of him and he does. It becomes the beginning of their rekindled relationship.

Similarly, Sand has a strong sense of obligation. There are already metas out there about how Sand has a bit of a hero complex. He sees Ray too drunk to drive and he had to step in. He doesn't just take the keys and order a taxi. No, he takes the keys and drives Ray. Sand sees Ray being all sad and pathetic and he can't stop himself from helping. It makes him feel useful. It makes him feel needed.

Both of these men are caretakers. They show affection by providing care. Sand ends up cooking for Ray just as Fai cooks for Wing even when he's sick. As an added bonus, they both make fried rice.

Both Sand and Fai are characters that stand completely still. Ray and Wing always know where to find them. Sand can always be found at YOLO and Fai is at his apartment. Because of this, Ray and Wing come and go as they please. They know that Sand and Fai will take them back...until they finally don't.

Ray as Ho Po-Wing

Starting on a base level, both characters are bratty, needy, promiscuous, spoiled, and selfish. But most importantly, they both share a love of fluffy cardigans.

(I also have a theory they keep putting Ray in wife beaters as an homage to the 90's HK cinema style because otherwise...I just don't understand why, as a rich asshole, he's always in wife beaters. By Thai BL logic, he should be in shirts with too many buttons unbuttoned.)

Wing and Ray are both the ones controlling the pace and direction of the relationship. They come when they need someone to nurture their wounds, both physically and metaphorically. They leave when they're bored or have things they deem more important. They both initiate intimacy and won't take no for an answer.

Wing does this by first trying to join Fai on the couch and then chasing after him to the bed and begging him to let them sleep together.

Ray does it by continuously getting Sand to get in the car with him and then using his puppy dog eyes.

They are both also very, very pouty.

Wing's line is "We could start over". He says it every time he comes back after he's the one that ends the relationship. Fai always fights taking him back, but he always does it anyway.

Ray doesn't really have a line yet (unless you count his "na na naa~"s) but he bats his eyelashes and so far Sand has given into him every time. Sand keeps trying to set boundaries, but the moment Ray begs a little bit, Sand crumbles like a house of cards and lets Ray have whatever he wants.

Relationship Parallels

Wong Kar-Wai is known for making movies about star crossed lovers who are meant for each other, but aren't meant to be together.

Like Wing and Fai, Sand and Ray fill in each other's cracks in a way that complements each other. However, because of the nature of the cracks themselves, them complementing each other is exactly what makes the relationship so toxic. One stays and one goes. One takes and one gives. One is steady and one is flighty.

Most of what I wanted to say about the parallels between their relationships is in the character comparison. What I'm more interested in is the future of SandRay's relationship, especially if they continue to parallel Wing and Fai's in Happy Together.

Obviously, Wing and Fai don't end up together at the end. It wouldn't be a Wong Kar-Wai movie if they did. What is interesting is that Fai's relationship with Wing eventually pushes him into becoming something angry and spiteful. Once Wing heals, Fai knows that he'll become bored and want to leave. In an attempt to get him to stay, he steals and hides Wing's passport which is insane because they are both gay men stuck in a foreign country where they don't speak the language.

Wing, of course, leaves anyway.

There is also a third character, Chang, whom Fai ended up liking. These new feelings are what eventually pushes Fai to leave Argentina and move on from Wing and move on with his life.

The question is, if SandRay follows that same path as Happy Together, what will be the passport that Sand tries to hold over Ray and who will be Sand's Chang?

Stylistic Parallels

Smoking

Making Ray and Sand smoke is definitely an homage to Happy Together with the added bonus of being a metaphor. For the most part, we rarely see characters, especially main characters, smoke in Asian media because smoking is reserved for 'bad' characters.

Cigarettes in Happy Together represent boredom. Fai and Wing smoke at the beginning before they rekindle their relationship because they are just moving through life. Once Fai and Wing get back together, cigarettes stop making an appearance. It isn't until their relationship started deteriorating that we see the men smoking again.

This can also be said about Sand Ray's relationship. They started their 'involvement' with cigarettes. However, the last time we actually see them smoking is in ep 2 right before they hook-up. Since then, we have not seen either of them smoking. This probably means that we'll see one or both of them smoking again when their relationship starts to break down.

(In the preview for ep 5, there is an ashtray in the background on the balcony so let's see if Boston finding out about them is a catalyst for them to start breaking down.)

And of course, there is the added homoeroticism of asking for a light.

Ray's Opening and Closing Scenes

Ray's episode is really what made me go "I see you P'Jojo".

Ray's episode starts with a shot of him isolated and in emotional pain. The camera is claustrophobically close and it keeps moving around. He has a little voiceover opening. It's calm, it's contemplative, it's a little existential, and it is irrevocably sad. If that is not a Wong Kar-Wai staple, then idk what is. Even the song that starts playing gives me 80s, 90s Cantopop vibes.

Ray talks about how Mew being his emergency contact and the one he goes to. Fai talks about how Wing always comes back to him and says "Let's start over".

The movie and the episode ends with both of them once again isolated, alone. They've been through an emotional journey and they've technically moved on. But there's always the idea of not being able to fully let go in Wong Kar-Wai's movie. So just like how Fai has physically removed himself from Wing, but not emotionally, has Ray actually fully removed himself from Mew?

Cinematography

Then there's just a collection of scenes that reminded me very heavily of Happy Together and Wong Kar-Wai's style. I would have added pictures from his other movies for comparison, but Tumblr only lets me put 30 images in a post and I don't want to make a 2nd post.

This scene is specifically from the 1st trailer so I hope they keep it in the show.

This one I call the inevitability of falling. Both Sand and Fai realize they're fully committed to their decision to take care of Ray and Wing here.

The end title card

Actually, all of the end title cards give very Wong Kar-Wai vibes. Look at that saturated, neon color grading. Look at the elongated shots. The intense feeling of isolation.

I'm assuming we'll get all the characters at one point, but so far it looks like the end credit cards indicate who the narrator of each episode is.

Anyway, that's it for me! Sorry it was so long and rambling. I tried to organize my thoughts but as I was thinking, more thoughts would pop up and I'd get distracted. If you made it this far, thanks for reading!

[danrifics]

15 years is a long time...

I've been lucky enough to be here for about 13 of those years and while I didn't get myself too involved in the phandom until 2019, outside of religiously watching phan proof when i was 16, Dan and Phil have been there on my screens since i was a teenager. Their videos quite literally raised me. I would sit and listen to the radio show every week and my friends and I would post about it on facebook, those post still haunt me to this day and make me feel incredibly old every time memories tell me how long ago it was.

I think today is really fitting for me to write a little personal essay on my journey and my feelings here, so i guess if you're interested then you can click the read more <3

I don't know if i fully have the words to describe properly what Dan and Phil and the Phandom mean to me, but i'll try. (I'm gonna do this in context of the last 5 years because that's when i've been most active and when I think they've impacted my life more than they ever did before.)

In 2019, I'd previously been in the Shadowhunters fandom, but as that show finished in May of that year I'd basically lost any form of fandom I had and I felt lost because fandoms are always a big part of my life and to suddenly feel like I didn't have one was hard so in June 2019 when Dan posted his coming out video everything suddenly clicked into place.

This was a community i'd loved from afar for many years and there was an opening for me to jump in. So I did. That was the best thing to ever happen to me. I'm not exaggerating, finding a place in this fandom changed my life for the better.

For the first time in my life I felt like I had friends online, from the first discord server i joined (TY LY Trashcans/ the phannie pack you'll always be famous) to Kris and Leo and to all the amazing mutuals I made, 2019 was really a cool time for me. Unfortunately a lot of these people have come and gone from my life but I often think back to what an impact they all had on me.

And then to my group now, the Rat Relaxation Chat (RRC!!!) without the hiatus ending I wouldn't be friends with any of you guys. See thats the thing, Dan and Phil didn't just bring themselves back into my life. They did something even better, brought the community back. The hiatus was hard, i've seen many of my mutuals just stop posting one day and never come back, it felt like every week we'd get smaller and smaller but then DAPG came back and so did a bunch of people and we even got some new faces and the community picked itself back up again.

As a result of that the RRC was born. For the first time in my life I was meeting my friends outside of discord, from WAD to TIT, Im literally gone end up having met all my best friends <3 (as well as so many mutuals)

I've loved so much over the last 5 years making gifs and memes and video edits and heartbreaking text posts. I'm so grateful for all the people who have ever follewed me, interacted with me, sent me hate messages, All the people who helped me make it possible for so many people to watch the WAD premiere, The people who help me with DGPdaily and the TIT blog.,The other amazing artists and gif makers and writers and archivists and anyone who has ever called themselves a phannie.

The Phandom is special, it's a community like no other. We really are a family, Dan and Phil really are our dads.

It's funny I stared this with full intentions of saying what Dan and Phil meant to me, but in the end it became all about the community they let us build. This is why I can't come up with enough words to tell them what they mean, because they mean the entire world to me because they created that world.

Dan and Phil are my friends, my best friends. They're my heros, the people I look up to most in the world because they make me feel safe and loved and I feel that love now more than I ever have before. Watching them grow older and gayer, watching the confidence grow over the years, watching them find themselves. Its a feeling like no other.

They deserve everything good in the world and i'm so glad to see them so happy and honest and open.

I don't know what the future holds for us but I know whatever it is is gonna be amazing and I hope I get to do this with you all for many more years to come.

15 years is a long time...

[gadriezmannsgirl]

Can u do a pedri angst where him and reader finally make it official after months of him chasing after her but the next day the paparazzi find him getting cozy with a girl qnd its all over the media and she feels embarrassed but he doesnt think its a big deal so they get into a fight but make up in the end

I had this already done and then guess what...? I saw the same req but with Gavi🥴 Please, I don't really know how many times I've said it but don't request the exact same thing to other writers. I had this made before I saw it with Gavi so...🥴 Please, tell me what you think of this, I truly hope you like it!

Wrong Move -P.G8

Summary: He doesn't see what's wrong but you do

You remember the excitement on Pedro's face when you told him that you were finally agreeing to go on a date with him after five months of him trying. He went all in towards you and hugged you against him for a whole five minutes murmuring a few thank you's and a few you won't regret it's.

And it's not like you weren't interested in him, because you were; but, he was a famous football player and you were a simple univeristy student who works her ass off to pay for her university and bills. His busy and flashy life didn't contrasted a single bit with your boring and stressing studing one.

You were also scared of the media breaking into your private life and not to mentions his fans that could break you in millions of pieces with three words and also he had a reputation often being connected with random girls with the context of a hookup, he saying that he didn't looked for a serious relationship made you hesitate about him but Pedri reassured you and show you that, that was past, that he truly saw himself in a long run with you and that you'll be more than a random hookup.

He worked hard for you to believe him and he show you he really meant it.

That's why you gave him a chance and after eight months together as girlfriend and boyfriend and one month out in the public eye, you felt for the first time ever doubtful of everything he had said to you.

Pedro had asked if you wanted to join him, Fer, Adrián and their girlfriends on a night out since it was Adrian girlfriend's birthday and as much as you wanted to, you couldn't because you had to submitt a twenty-five pages essay in fours hours and you were barely at the fifteen page.

"Don't overwork yourself, amor, please" Pedro had said grabbing his keys "Te quiero, sé que podrás hacerlo, bonita" (I love you, I know you can do it) He smiled as you kissed him goodbye

"Te escribo al terminar, diviértete pero no mucho" (I'll text you whenever I'm done with it, have fun but not that much) You smiled fixing the neck of his polo as he pulled you closer to him by the waist kissing your lips once more

"I could never, not if you're not with me" He said against your lips before pecking them twice

"Anda, lindo. Te quiero" (Go pretty boy. Love you)

"Yo más, regreso más tarde" (Love you more, I'll be back later)

Two hours later, you got some weird inspiration and managed to finish your essay, you texted Pedro with the image of your submitted work and a lil "🎉😌 Did it!" To which he replied with a heart eyes emoji and "My smart girl" as you smile and got ready to have some dinner and shower.

Four hours later, you were sat on your couch with your chest tightening and watching the video of Pedri with a girl all over him, they were sit in some couch but this girl had her whole front pressed up against his side, her arms linked with his and they were talking.

The video showed him looking at her and sometimes nodding or shaking his head speaking with a smile but she was laughing, throwing her head back, pushing her hair out of her shoulder, the video ended with Pedro getting up and she following him.

Underneath, the comments were all of them disappointed on Pedro and supporting you but it didn't mattered to you.

What mattered is that how you were feeling, you were embarrassed, everyone was talking about how you were "The one who got cheated on", you wanted to cry and deeply wanted to know what is going on, on Pedro's head. You wanted him to tell you what did you just saw and the why behind his actions.

Ten minutes later approximately, you heard the front door being opened, soon your heard him taking off his shoes and then leaving his keys on the holder you guys have. Seconds later, you saw his figure greeting you in your living room.

"How did you passed from thirteen to almost thirty pages of content in two hours? Was I distracting you?" He laughed lightly coming over to you but his comment didn't changed your facial expressions, he didn't noticed them "I'm truly happy for you, bonita. However, don't let an assigment that long get up to you at last minute ever again. I don't want to see you that stressed out again, you were gonna pass out and I would have done it too 'cus-" You interrupted him showing him the video

"What's this and who's that girl?" Your questions sounded defensive and catched Pedro out of guard.

"¿Disculpa?" (Sorry?)

"Who's that girl? And what is this thing that's happening on the video?"

"She's just one of Ferran's friends"

"And are Ferran's friends allowed to link their arms through yours, push themselves against you and basically hint that they want you to... You know?"

"She wasn't hinting anything"

"You are right. She wasn't hinting, she was showing you. She was openly flirting with you and you weren't doing anything to stop it"

"You're overreacting this"

"Am I?" You stood up shaking your head in disbelief "If I am, then why millions of people are agreeing with me too? I'm not the only one. People are thinking you cheated on me with this girl"

"And you believe them?"

"I don't... But should I? You were incredibly cosy with letting her rest her front against your fucking arm over and over again. You were laughing, shaking and nodding your head at her words without pushing her away or letting her know you had someone waiting for you at home"

"Had?" He asked eyes wide open as you closed your mouth "You're just being jealous. I wasn't flirting with her and I definitely couldn't care any less if she had another intentions with me because I am that crazy in love with you, I am freaking greatful and satisfied for what I have at home that I don't need to see anything or anyone on the sidelines"

"Really? You have such a weird way to show that"

"Y/N..."

"I'm tired, Pedri. We can talk it later, I'm not in the mood to hear or see you anymore" You sighed shaking your head, you grabbed your phone and passed by him going to your shared bedroom "I definitely didn't think this could happen to us"

He heard it.

"Nothing has happen to us! You're overreacting!" He yelled pushing his head up so he can see you

"Would you think I'm overreacting if tables were turned around? Would you think it's okay if I go to some other man and flirt and link my arm through his and push myself onto him? Would you accept, me looking into your eyes and tell you: "I wasn't flirting with him"? Wouldn't you feel down knowing a millions of people have seen it and are letting you look like you were cheated on? Wouldn't you feel embarrassed? Are you sure you wouldn't? Because if you wouldn't then yes... I'm overreacting" You said looking into his eyes "Accept it, you fucked it up when you let her get that close to you"

"So this is it?"

"I don't even want to know if this is it or if it isn't. You can make your own assumptions and you can let me known them with another video if you like, I'll be in the guest room. I'm done. Night, Pedri"

And with that you were gone as he stood there looking up at where you were standing. He took his phone and got inside Twitter, the video was the first thing loading into his homepage.

He gulped watching it, it really could be misinterpreted but he wasn't doing anything with other intentions. He loves you with his whole life. It can be said that he loves you even more than he loves football, you came into his life unexpectedly and turned it around 360°.

He didn't see girls who weren't you with other eyes, he even stopped receiving fangirls numbers to prove you he is serious with you and to let you know how much he respects you.

"Why didn't I pushed her away?" He questioned himself

She was funny and he did liked her, as a friend, she lets herself be liked and gets into the group fast but in his mind and heart you were the only one.

You are the only one and he did the wrong move. His efforts that once were high now laid at 0 and he did understand your point of view now.

Frustrated with himself he got out of the app and his eyes connected with his home lockscreen. You and him kissing each other in a beach during you vacations in Canarias, the beauty of the photo is the love you two have for each other and the kiss that was interrupted by smiles on both of your faces.

He has to make it up to you.

Picking up said photo, he captured it with: Mi única chica, te amo💜 hoy y siempre♾️. (My one and only, I love you. Today and always) He turned off the comments for everyone except for you and headed up to the guest room.

He had to be careful with his words and explain himself as much as he could. Your eyes were closed but your cheeks had tear marks, you were awake just ignoring his presence. He sighed and crunched down to be in front of you.

"Que soy un idiota" (I'm an idiot) He began "I swear to everything I own and to everyone I love that I truly don't care about her, I talked to her and tried to be just her friend, she's nice and she may had wanted something with me but the only one I want, the only attention I want, the only girl I will care about the most, the only girl I will flirt back with, the only girl I fall in love with, the only one who I make fool with, my only one everything is you" He reached out to push your hair out of your face and when he saw you didn't reacted back to it, he let his palm lay softly on your cheek carressing it with his thumb.

"I'm sorry, mi vida. I really don't know why I didn't pushed her back, I should have because I'm a taken man but I guess she's new over here and we just wanted her to be comfortable with us"

"But not that comfortable" You said as Pedri smiled

"I know, she crossed a line" You open your eyes and looked at Pedri "I'm sorry" You shook your head smiling lightly "And you didn't overreacted, I would've done the exact same thing if tables were turned around. I'm truly sorry, mi vida"

"Don't do it again, Pedri"

"Pedro"

"Pedri"

"Pedro"

"Pedri"

"You only call me Pedri when you're mad!"

"I still am!"

"What can I do for that bad feeling to go away?"

"Cuddle me, love me, give me some ice cream and never do it again?"

"I can do all four and mostly the second one" You smiled and lifted the blanket for him to step inside. He smiled taking off his hoodie and joggers being left in his boxers and wrapped his arms around you.

He pushed his head down and searched for your lips, kissing you softly and slow "Te amo" He breathed out

"Te amo, mi niño lindo" You whispered back as he pressed you further into him. You guys got comfy and after a few minutes Pedro gasped "What's wrong?"

"The ice cream" He turned you around and got out of your hold

"Pedro, no! Come back here! Ice cream can wait!"

"I know how that goes! Ice cream CANNOT wait!" You smiled widely falling back into the pillows.

He may did a wrong move but he always knew how to fix it.

°°° °°° °°° °°°

Taglist: @gaviypedrisbride @stuckinaf4nfiction @elijahslover @azzpenswrld @http-isabela

[vidreview]

VIDREV: "NO CGI is really just INVISIBLE CGI" by The Movie Rabbit Hole

[originally posted march 19th 2024]

like a lot of folks, i've grown weary of the preponderance of CGI in Hollywood flicks these days. it's all but a cultural tradition at this point to watch John Carpenter's The Thing, sigh wistfully at the goopy silicone animatronics, and say "man, you couldn't make anything like this today." the Marvel/Disney machine has done a lot of heavy lifting to engender this perspective, particularly in the cape department where every aspect of the film is under intense and non-negotiable executive revision until quite literally days before theatrical release (as was the case with Marvel's The Marvels). it doesn't help that this shift has a lot less to do with what's best for any given movie, and a hell of a lot more to do with the lack of unionization in the visual effects industries making them a readily exploitable source of labor. in such an environment, films that nevertheless lean on practical effects are enticing (and, quite often, demonstrably better) enough that we'll sing their praises to the point of hyperbole.

enter Jonas of The Movie Rabbit Hole, here with a genuinely essential series of video essays to slap some sense into that hyperbole and bring us all back down to earth.

one of the more important directors for the development of unobtrusive CGI is David Fincher. i have my fair share of issues with his films, but credit where it's due: they're constantly pushing technology in ways that you absolutely would not expect. there's a crane shot at the start of The Social Network that couldn't be shot with a crane for safety reasons, so instead it was stitched together in post from footage taken on multiple 4K cameras at once. a shocking majority of the blood you'll see in his movies is CGI. the praise i've portioned for his recent films, even as i find him sort of a fundamentally anti-human director, is that he understands that visual effects work best as a supplement to existing footage, rather than a pure replacement.

i share all this to underline my use of the word "essential" in describing this series. i worked in film for a few years, i went to film school, i try to understand the production process as pragmatically as possible. i am under no illusions that Christopher Nolan flicks or the John Wick movies are totally practical. i'm not an anti-CGI evangelist! and yet, even then, i had NO idea just how wrongheaded i still was on the subject until i watched these videos.

Jonas brings 18 years of visual effects experience to bear on a series that feels very much like him trying to settle an argument he's been having for about as long. he has countless examples of films praised for their lack of CGI that relied heavily on their CGI, using the demo reels of effects houses as the smoking gun. Jonas speaks with a plain matter-of-fact-ness that's bolstered just so by an edge of smug frustration, the kind you only get after bearing a cross for years. but it's not just an "i'm right, you're wrong" affair by any stretch. Jonas does a fantastic job communicating a lot of complicated subjects in ways that are friendly to even the most casual of viewers, rarely blaming the audience for their ignorance when studios and market trends are the real culprit. and because he's a veteran of the industry, he's able to interview prominent figures that would otherwise be inaccessible for the average essayist, like Academy Award winning VFX supervisor Paul Franklin.

(and here we come up against a question countenanced more than once on this blog-- where is the line between video essay and documentary? i think this readily qualifies as the former given the first-person direct address shot-in-his-living-room style, yet somehow i feel a bit uneasy with the classification. oh well, a topic for another day)

the most eye-opening section for me is also one of the first, where Jonas confronts the public image of Top Gun: Maverick. i haven't seen this film yet, but i have seen the endless and unqualified buzz about its practical effects. and to be sure, these deserve quite a lot of praise-- they put real actors in real fighter jets for crying out loud! yet in all that crowing, a very important fact totally fell by the wayside: nary a single shot in the film is without digital manipulation. and not just in the basic touch-up sense, removing safety anachronisms and the like. the jets, the cockpits, and the actors themselves were all extensively replaced with digital doubles! i felt like an utter fool when he pointed out that quite often films praised for their lack of CGI will have more VFX artists credited than any other department in production. like, holy shit, it's all right there on the screen? what job were those hundreds of people doing if it was "all practical effects"?

which is the crux of the series' title: "NO CGI is really just INVISIBLE CGI." we have --or perhaps it'd be more honest to say i have-- a tendency to address CGI in binaristic terms. either it's there, or it's not there, right? Fincher's team can put digital blood running down Daniel Craig's face in the shower after he gets shot in The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, but it's Craig's physical presence that sells it. a film like Top Gun: Maverick makes its bones marketing the spectacle, and because there's such fatigue with CGI-heavy blockbusters any mention of intermediary visual effects carries with it a stain on the authenticity. but really, it does nothing to diminish the practical nature of the photography to also acknowledge how much of what makes it to cinemas is, essentially, an extremely realistic cartoon.

and this is what Jonas's series really exposes for me. a lot of what we're looking at here is rotoscoping, the longstanding tradition of animating over top of live footage a la Disney's Snow White in 1937, though the technique was truly mastered by Max Fleischer in the 1910s. is there some gradeschool nag whispering in the back of our head that a rotoscope is just elaborate tracing? that it's a cheat, because "real" animation is done without reference? (for anyone who has actually worked in animation, this is your cue to laugh derisively)

but the truth is that you do not get one without the other. it takes a lot of planning to film a scene with an eye towards being reanimated, just as it takes tremendous skill to make that animation look good. if Top Gun: Maverick feels viscerally real, it is because the visual effects artists had a real reference to work from. one is not inherently better than the other, more pure or authentic. this isn't the 80s anymore, man. i mean, to get real fucking technical, the instant we stopped shooting on film was the death of "true practicality" in cinema, because a digital sensor must by its nature interpret visual information as raw data and then translate it to something we'd recognize as an image. celluloid film is purely optical, but a digital sensor requires someone (or a team of someones) to write an algorithm to do that interpreting-- which is, inherently, subjective. different cameras have different image processing algorithms, different bitrates and dynamic ranges, to say nothing of custom LUTs and the extensive post-processing required to make RAW footage not look like complete ass. and even now, celluloid cannot be said to be truly pure, because any film shot on celluloid is then digitally scanned, subjected to the exact same post production processing as any other digital film, the final product re-scanned to celluloid to give it a true filmic look, and then yet again digitized for wide distribution (because most cinemas today only have digital projectors).

this is not A Bad Thing! it is simply the material reality of film production in the 21st century. it has many upstream and downstream effects, of course, many of which have negatively impacted the quality of films and television in various ways-- but these are not qualities inherent to digital technology! rather, they are the result of a profit-seeking industry eager to cut corners wherever possible. the existence of CGI is not to blame for the bad CGI in Marvel movies, it's the greedy executives exploiting non unionized labor, forcing crunch at every level with no regard for the human cost, endlessly meddling in the production with their indecisive market-analysis driven brand alterations. ah, the age of the executive auteur, when at last the soulless corporate mindset once commonly decried by artists and audiences alike has been fully naturalized and even embraced by people who call themselves fans, who would sooner throw a director under the bus than say a bad word about Kevin fucking Feige.

it's a pathetic state of affairs, and it can only be called a brilliant act of marketing that CGI burnout in the public has been leveraged to only further erase the essential labor of visual effects artists. Jonas here even points out, much to my slack-jawed amazement, that promotional behind the scenes footage today frequently removes green screens and other indicators of a digital-forward production as a way of unduly acquiring practical effects credibility. as someone who watches a lot of these BTS features, i feel lied to and manipulated, and ashamed of myself for not realizing that making-ofs are just as much marketing as they are educational, often moreso by a lot. it's all just an illusion! and it cannot be repeated often enough that this is an erasure of a historically under-unionized industry, one whose exploitation has been thoroughly documented for years. that this erasure is occurring at a moment when finally, finally, finally corners of the visual effects world have begun to shed the libertarian values inherited from the tech industry and actually unionize is pretty fucking conspicuous to say the least.

i call these videos essential because they reveal a tremendous blind spot in our media literacy, even among those like myself who've studied media extensively. we are, generally, pretty good at identifying the weaknesses in a finished film, but our lack of experience and our credulity towards marketing that doesn't feel like marketing leads us to utterly fail when we attempt to diagnose their cause. when our analysis lacks an understanding of the material conditions of production, as informed by firsthand accounts of those who actually do the work, we cannot help but embarrass ourselves and in so doing blatantly misinform our audiences.

it didn't used to be like this. i remember the late 90s and early aughts, when joints like ILM were praised for their innovations. how often do you hear about VFX houses today? probably only when they go bankrupt. it's such a shame, because what Jonas does in these videos most of all is reveal just how astonishing the work of visual effects artists actually is. these are the perils of an industry whose job is to be invisible, which is why it's so important that their labor be made visible after the fact, celebrated rather than papered over, analyzed extensively rather than mentioned offhand. the truth is that quite a lot of us have been boldly, profoundly wrong about CGI in movies for a long time, and we're well past due for a correction of the record.

all of which is to say that these are some really great videos and you should absolutely go watch them right now

NOTE FROM THE FUTURE: episode 4 came out and it's also great.

[schakira]

@hexa-jon

kay so i'm just putting these to show my experience with card games. i've made 2 card games in my life. one was a redesign of poker cards based on constellations, stars, space phenomena and more... and the other was an entire card game i made from scratch, with its own set of rules (which i am still polishing to this day.)

i'm assuming you mean the latter. if so, then i've accumulated some knowledge that i think i could help. i'll eventually make a detailed video on my process, but here's the gist of it all ->

1) Make it simple. A card game HAS to be simple, in its gameplay and core mechanics. That means that there should not be too many variables at play to keep up with.

1-a) I know I struggle with making things simple, so when I made this card game, I used a set of poker cards and tried creating rules using ONLY the values on the cards, and tried to go from there.

1-b) Creativity is still allowed though. Try to restrict yourself and find ways to be creative from there.

2) Once you have a core mechanic for your card game, try building a simple set of rules. Then play test, test, and test, and test again. It's important to try and test as early as possible and see what rules work and what rules don't. Find someone willing to help you out. (I had my mom play my game, and she dislikes card games for their complexity, so having her play the game and figure things out and win with a smile on her face was a big achievement for me.)

2-a) Reward players for understanding the rules, and try not to make gameplays too punishing. Players should always have an opportunity to win, even on the last turn. Bring intensity to the game.

3) Once you have your set of rules, a working and engaging and easy gamplay, here is the fun part: making the cards and naming the card game. It's good to find themes and stick to them. For my card game Destroy the Crown, I tried to stick with structures of power, hierarchies.

4) Make the cards readable. I knooooow a lot of trading card games love to add a lot of tiny text that is hard to read and try to cramp as many things as possible... But that's not your goal. Try to make everything readable and accessible.

5) Think of how you want to sell the cards. Are they already prexisting decks? Or boosters? It's always better to start with decks, stores accomodate those better than boosters and they sell better.

6) Creating a card game is a very long journey, and it's impossible to get it right on the first try. You'll often go back and redo things and rewrite rules. It's the sign of a good card game. Try to not change too much though. Polishing isn't about tearing everything down.

I don't know what else to say, that won't have me write an essay on my entire thought process creating my card games. So I'll just keep it short for my conclusion:

HAVE. FUN. I cannot overstate the importance of fun enough.

That's it! Hope it helped!

[patchwork-crow-writes]

A couple of days ago I wrote up a rough essay highlighting some passing similarities between the characters of Miquella in Elden Ring and Ralsei in Deltarune (read here if you'd like!), and how their shared affinities to childhood and dreams might inform the latter's character and serve to "compel" the affection of the players to one end or another.

I have had additional thoughts on the subject of Ralsei and his associations with childlike characteristics, which I would also like to share.

This may be another long one, so under the Read More it goes!

If you have read my previous post on the subject, you'll know that I drew up all the different ways that Ralsei displays or embodies the concept of childhood and infancy in his character design and personality. But one idea I failed to touch upon, which more closely links Ralsei to his dark kingdom, is that of play. Exploring the connection between the make-believe-esque natures of the dark worlds, and Ralsei's position as their prince, has yielded up some interesting insights which I would like to share with you all.

I think it would be a good idea to define what is meant by the term "play" here. The most obvious definition is as an activity which is undertaken for pleasure or recreation, as opposed to more practical concerns. But there's also believed to be an evolutionary component to play, as a way for children to learn more about themselves, their peers and the wider world in a safe and controlled environment. Children at play often imitate the behaviours and rituals of the adults around them, like cooking, socialising, working at jobs, and even the more performative aspects of romance and child-rearing (which we shall return to in a moment). Of course, play can also incorporate more fantastical elements, such as the plots and settings of movies, TV shows, comic books and video games, as well as larger-than-life concepts such as outer space, ancient history and human cultures of all stripes. To enhance the experience, participants can be assigned various roles to perform, with the aid of props that can be fashioned from all kinds of mundane objects lying around. From these building blocks, new narratives are constructed and played out, power roles are tried on and tested, and through the actions and reactions of their peers, children can learn how to get along with each other and forge stronger bonds.

And so we come to the Dark Worlds, the settings where much of Deltarune's core gameplay takes place. I'm certain you would have already begun to see how the above elements of play translate onto them. We have fantastical settings and plots - a sprawling kingdom in the first chapter and a towering megacity in the second; roles are conferred upon their participants to contextualise their journeys through those spaces; mundane objects become weapons, armour, provisions and even additional characters; and in their concluding moments the participants learn more about each other and are brought closer together as friends. This reaffirms the idea that dark worlds are glorified versions of make-believe, albeit with a clearly supernatural aspect that literally brings the fantasy aspects to life.

You can also see how this relates to Ralsei himself - as someone who has experienced almost nothing aside from his small and empty kingdom, it is through his experiences with Kris, Susie and Lancer that he begins to attain a greater understanding of the world and how it works, the people he calls his friends, the broader concepts of friendship and love, and even of his own sense of self. In many ways, he is a literal child at play, and in this context his more childlike attributes make sense.

And yet, in what might seem paradoxical, Ralsei is fairly mature and grown-up for what we might call an emobdiment of the notion of play. For one thing, he is the one that orchestrates and directs how the dark world games are played - he sets the terms under which the adventures are conducted. He casts Kris, Susie and himself as the Three Heroes, charged with the exploration and closure of new dark kingdoms; he offers guidance on how the game's mechanics work - which conveniently overlaps with teaching new players of Deltarune how to play; he is the one to offer suggestions on where to go and what to do; and he does this all in the service of ensuring the game that's being played is as fun, engaging and rewarding for the lightners as possible. There is an argument to be made on whether the Prophecy hamstrings Ralsei's ability to act, or is otherwise directing him in one way or another, but his conduct is a far cry from how we would expect a young, impulsive and easily-distracted child from performing in such a role.

Perhaps the most telling thing about Ralsei's maturity is that he is very insistent on when these adventures must come to an end. What we see of the dark worlds are finite, tightly-designed narrative experiences, though there is evidence of much more sprawling and unordered segments of these kingdoms that we are not permitted to access. Each one ends with Kris/us sealing the dark fountain away and restoring the room back to its light world arrangement. And when a threat to that finite experience presents itself, as Berdly is about to open another dark fountain in Chapter 2, Ralsei uncharacteristically snaps at him, telling the lightners that such thoughtless actions will bring about the Roaring, an event of apocalyptic proportions that will put an end to the dark worlds and their denizens once and for all.

Thus, Ralsei seems to occupy this strange, almost liminal space between childhood (learning about himself, his friends and the world through play) and adulthood (orchestrating and contextualising these play sessions, ensuring that the rules are understood and upheld, and that play ends at an appropriate moment in time). As to what this points to? Perhaps it is meant to convey that Ralsei is himself the embodiment of regulated, purposeful play - play which provides social, educational and emotional benefits to its participants - while the Roaring and the Titans might represent a notion of unregulated, self-indulgent play that is dictated by impulse and feelings, without any guiding hand to ensure that things do not run out of control, or that nobody gets seriously hurt.

And that's where my thoughts on this subject have landed so far! There's not really a point I was trying to make, just exploring a theme that I found interesting and may hold some clues about Deltarune's narrative and Ralsei's place in it. If I have additional thoughts I may regurgitate them here in a similar fashion, but otherwise, that's it for now! Thanks for taking the time to read :)

[autisticempathydaemon]

Hello! I hope you’re doing well! This is for your redacted match-up game since I thought it looked fun to do :)

(I also wanted to mention that it’s really fun seeing what songs you pick for the match-ups and has introduced me to some new favorites)(No pressure to do this quickly ofc <3)

What song are you fixated on at the moment? What lyric or verse, and why? A totally basic song, but I’ve resparked my obsession with Taylor Swift’s song “Wildest Dreams”. I love the lyrics “Staring at the sunset, babe / Red lips and rosy cheeks / Say you'll see me again / Even if it's just in your wildest dreams”. The whole song is very, like, yearning and honestly does remind me of a vibrant sunset just before it softens into a pink and yellow glow. And I like the “wildest dreams” lyric because I daydream a lot. Not to mention, I enjoy the music video for it.

What is your Enneagram type? Type 9w1

Do you love gargantuan Youtube video essays, and if so, which is your favorite and why? I like watching long videos in general. Sometimes it’s just gameplay, sometimes it’s social commentary, sometimes it’s ghost hunting videos, sometimes it’s something that randomly popped up in my for you page and looked interesting. The most recent one I watched was “Exploring the Secret Lesbian World of Interwar Paris” by Kaz Rowe.

Tell me about your childhood imaginary friend. I didn’t really have one, but I pretended to have an imaginary “boyfriend”. People at my elementary school were obsessed with dating for some reason even though we were, like, 8 and so that’s the main reason why I said it was a bf. (It’s also funny bcuz now I’m listening to imaginary boyfriends).

What is your go-to way to fall asleep? If I’m too awake from an exciting/busy day I’ll watch youtube videos to calm down. I sleep with my childhood stuffed animal. I feel bad if I don’t and hugging it makes me feel better. I also usually sleep with a night light because I hate not being able to see things if I wake up in the middle of the night. 

If you had to change your name, what would it be, and why? (In tandem, if you have changed your name, why did you pick that one?) Well, I like the name “Meri”. But if I actually had to change my name, I’d probably just switch my middle name and first name with each other, since I like them well enough.

What is your favorite of Redacted’s audios, and why? I really like David’s “Watching a Scary Movie With Your Alpha Werewolf” audio. I love his laughs so much (I could  s q u e a l  into a pillow)! It’s also really calming in the sense that it’s relaxing in a fun way (just chilling and watching a movie), so I go back to it a lot.

What Redacted boy holds no appeal to you, and why? Like, not the one you hate but the one who you don’t get the hype for. (I won’t judge, I promise.) Ollie. He’s really sweet and I don’t hate him at all, but I can only watch two of his audios in a row before wanting to change to something else. 

Tell me about that one book/movie/tv show you know all the words to. Oh! I have one for each of these: If it’s a book, then “The Princess and the Fangirl” by Ashley Poston. If it’s a TV show, then “Gravity Falls” (I watch it as a summer solstice tradition). And if it’s a movie, then “Miss Congeniality (2000)” (I love those 90s/2000s romance and comedy movies). 

Which Redacted boy are you platonically attracted to? Like- forget dating, which dude do you want to be your best friend? I totally get the romantic appeal of Sam, but I would like him as a friend because he’s very down-to-earth, caring and I like his vibes. (I'd also include Caelum, I DON'T want to date him at all, but he's a cute little guy that makes me smile a lot).

Do you have a go-to thing you ramble about when you’re tired, and if so, what is it? (For example, my boyfriend knows I’m ready to sleep when I start talking about space.) I don’t think I ramble about anything. I’m pretty quiet when I’m tired. Although, sometimes I do get “slap happy” and find a lot of things hilarious before I eventually get to the exhausted point of ‘no-talking’.

Tell me your go-to gas station and drink combo. KitKats and Coca-Cola (slushie or the actual drink)!!

Tell me about your favorite playlist at the moment. One of my private playlists that’s a mix of 2010s EDM and pop, 90s and 2000s rock, alternative music and country songs.

What’s your guilty pleasure media, and why? Listening to Redacted Audio is the biggest, and also reading/writing fanfiction. It’s embarrassing to talk to any of my IRL friends or family about it even though I’m fully supportive and excited about discussing all of those things, it's just the weird reputation it carries.

And whatever else you think tells me about who you are! I’m introverted. I have two cats! (I didn't realize how many cat lovers were in this fandom). I believe that I’m biromantic and demisexual. Some things I like to do are: write, read, go camping with friends (I love hanging out, playing card games, swimming and eating campfire food), doing karaoke, and playing dress up in costumes/outfits I’ve collected over the years. Sometimes I’ll draw or paint but not as often. I often have dance parties or a good cry to de-stress (which are like two different vibes XD but it works). The video games I like to play are Minecraft, Stardew Valley, and The Sims. I like to take quizzes. I used to take Buzzfeed and Quotev quizzes a lot when I was younger, but now I mostly go on uquiz. (I like pressing buttons).

I also really like paleontology. I can watch ghost hunting videos (as stated before) BUT I cannot do horror movies. I’m assuming it’s because I get too involved with the movie, and ghost hunting does not have as high of stakes. I guess I would describe myself as someone that is pretty quiet until you get to know me. I tend to be very watchful and cautious when I’m out in public with friends or family (which probably comes from my ‘older sibling need’ to make sure that the younger ones don’t get kidnapped or hurt). I count myself as an early bird, since I wake up around 6-7am most days. My style is pretty casual, maybe sometimes dark academia inspired if I’m feeling stylish. And my main love languages are quality time and words of affirmation. (I hope all of that helps!)

Your entry gave me so much trouble in the most delightful way. You paint me a picture of someone so easy to get along with that it was hard for me to pick one redacted suitor over the other. In the end, looking at the charming ways you’d contrast one another, I like Asher for you best.

You’re a cat person; he’s a literal dog person. You’re an introvert; he’s an extrovert. You’re an older sibling, he’s a younger sibling. You’re a morning person; he’s sleeping in till noon if you let him. You’re a cozy gamer; he’s an FPS, COD kind of guy. Yet, you two get along so well. Type Nines are characterized by a desire for peace and quiet, typical of an older sibling, and Asher as the emotionally intelligent beta of the Shaw Pack would be able to provide that. One thing that particularly convinced me was your love languages in that Asher strikes me as one of the most verbally affectionate and forthcoming of the redacted men and would be best suited for your love of words of affirmation.

That’s not to say he doesn’t indulge your need for quality time either; he’s perfect for that. Asher loves your cats, and they love him (once they get used to his shifted form). He orders pizza and wings for your romcom movie nights, most of which he hasn’t seen yet but is super happy to watch them for the first time with you. He’s always down for a good karaoke sess, whether you asked for one or not. He picks up and gets good at Stardew Valley immediately, especially when he finds out y’all can work on the same farm and that he can craft you a wedding ring. (That is, when he’s not trying to get himself an NPC husband. He is down bad for all those men, but he has a soft spot for Shane, can’t tell you why.)

Song:

We're making out inside crashed cars/ We're sleeping through all our memories/ I used to waste my time dreaming of being alive (now I only waste my time dreaming of you)/ Turn off the lights and turn off the shyness/ 'Cause all of our moves make up for the silence/ And oh, the way your makeup stains my pillowcase/ Like I'll never be the same

If you love 90’s/00’s rock and alternative, and I’ve given you Asher, could I give you anything other than a Fall Out Boy song? Obviously not, especially this era and track of Fall Out Boy. There’s something about their older songs that capture young, first love in the best, most singable way. Also, the title is a reference to the romance classic movie, Casablanca, and that coincidence really cinched my choice.

Runner-ups:

Huxley would be a gorgeous partner and runner-up for an early bird who loves camping. He’s also one of my favorite picks for someone on the ace spectrum; he just gives that vibe. (I’m also an asexual who loves Huxley, so that may be my bias coming through.) David is also a runner-up, one who almost beat out Asher except for the fact Asher would be more outwardly affectionate off the bat and would like your cats more.

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

[aether-friskets]

Why I Headcanon Waylon Park as a Trans Guy?

it came to me in a dream.

ok but jokes aside (well not entirely it DID actually originate because of a dream i had getting interrupted by a nonexistent video essay on the topic... dreams are weird man), i do want to try talking about my reasoning for this (although it's totally legit to hc a character as trans purely because you want to!! thats totally based also lol), because maybe it'd be interesting to hear the lens through which i saw this game? idk lol but i'm doing it anyway... below the cut in case it gets long

Ok immediate prefaces, A: i doubt this was actually the intended at all and i'm not trying to say it's canon, just saying why i read it that way :3 and B: this will probably be a rambling mess and I apologize, I'll try to make it somewhat make sense.

I guess I'll start with: a whole major thing of Outlast, is fighting to tear down this large corporation, that is like. the embodiment of shitty systems that exploit people (this post by bry mentions that general topic, although more focused on miles' angle). It's worth noting because, to me at least, fighting these sorts of systems really aligns with a lot of queer folks (and basically any group that gets fucked over by the system, which is most of them loll). There's like, this whole thing of Waylon seemingly fitting that image of the ideal typical man, with the wife and kids and a job, but he has to risk all of that to do what he feels is the right thing.

(Oh yeah, I guess quick tangent on that note. Yes I know in canon we literally see his dick lmao and also we know he has kids, which you might think would deter my hc here. but A: i already said ik it's probably not canon, i can still read into it regardless. B: intersex ppl exist. C: phalloplasty and other similar procedures exist. D: ppl can have kids in non-traditional way. so im prob not gonna cover that element of it more)

My brain hasn't been able to help but interpret his whole journey in a queer way, because i played it as a teenager still in the throes of understanding my identity and place in the world, so in the end this might not even make sense to anyone else. But, I'm trying to explain, so I'll continue to regardless.

I kind of saw it as Waylon hiding in the protection of an "ideal" life. On the surface he looks like he's in that American ideal family, but it's a subversion. He's only one of them because they think he is. Because he doesn't step out of line. Unlike Miles, who's more outspoken about issues, who seemingly has no one around him. He's treated as part of this "ideal" world, while working in the background to try and stop the exploitation and immoral acts going on.

When he's caught, when he's seen as something more complicated than first imagined, he's cast out. Lumped in with the same people being exploited by Murkoff already. He isn't "human" to them anymore. He's something else. Something they don't like.

Although the violence brought upon him is by the variants, it is still in part Murkoff's doing, since they fucked these people up via these experiments to a point of heightened violence and just generally ruining their lives more than they already had been by whatever they had done prior. That being said, they are still responsible for their own actions.

the stuff with Eddie is definitely the part that most resonated with me through this lens. I remember first playing it, and he scared me the most, for a lot of reasons. One of which being what he represented. He's The Groom. He wants someone to be his Bride, and you're it, even if you don't want that. As someone who's aroace AND already knew at that point that i wasn't a girl, this guy felt like a human embodiment of the pressures to fit what was expected of you. That one day, you'll be married and have kids. If you don't, then you're worthless.

But it's interesting especially, because Waylon IS married. He has kids already. He has that family. The difference is, in this hypothetical trans lens, he's not "really" in a traditional family. He's "pretending", as some might see it, because he's not "really one of them". Being Eddie's Bride is the situation that would've been expected of him, but he said "fuck that", and did his own thing.

Plus, like, with Eddie in particular, you will NEVER be what he wants. He will try to make his perfect bride, but you'll never be it. Even before Mount Massive, no one was what he wanted, judging by all the people he killed. He's a broken man desiring something but never liking his options.

Also just fucking. these lines from eddie make me lose my mind.

That part of you the world sees, they think it's perfect. As God intended. Even these idiots and lunatics see it. There's something special about you. On the surface. But when they look deeper, when anybody with eyes to see looks at what you truly are. That's why they don't trust you. You're not what you're meant to be. Not yet. This place can see into your mind. And the things you've done. Oh, they're a sin, darling.

like HELLO??

I know it's probably just Eddie rambling but it felt like he reached through the screen and grabbed me by the throat like.

Anyway in actual relation to my point. uh. Remember the thing I said about Waylon being a "fake" typical family? This kind of relates to that. Like, on the surface, he seems like he's got this perfect typical American family, he's "as God intended" (which. bro. i swear that exact phrase has been used against trans people so many times). But if you look closer, you'll realize there's more to it than that. Also like, going from the "as God intended" line to the thing about the things he's done being a sin, like hmmm. Maybe I'm reading into that too much, considering we know Eddie wants to make you into his Bride, so of course he's gonna think stuff like that. But still. It's a bit interesting to me.

Plus, it's interesting how, despite having a wife and kids, he's still more... feminized, I guess, than any other characters in this game. Both in the game itself, and within the fandom. Like, not just Eddie literally calling him a woman and trying to make him his bride, but also stuff like a variant near the beginning calling him a "pretty flower" before threatening him, Andrew (one of the staff) licking his face at the beginning of the game... A lot of violence and sexual-ish acts that are often directed at women in media. Even Frank, who I don't have as much to say about here, has some weirdly sexual undertones to his whole cannibalism thing.

This isn't entirely related but one part of the game that still sticks with me but I don't see mentioned as much, is near the beginning. Those guys stabbing the dead staff member. One of them remarks that "there are no observers here" and "do you think you're different? Something special?", which I think helps cement the whole idea that he's treated the same as the rest of people being exploited by Murkoff now. There's no turning back to that "ideal" life you were hiding in before. Hell, that's definitely reinforced more at the end of the game, when you choose to publish your footage, knowing Murkoff will come after you for it, and probably ruin your life. Maybe there's more interesting things to glean from that, but i thought they were interesting lines nonetheless.

anyway, overall I know this is probably just the ramblings of a trans/generally queer person reading WAY too much into a character that I happened to resonate with when i played the game, but i thought maybe it would be interesting for others to understand what would lead me to this conclusion? Anyway, that's all i've got on the subject right now, so I hope it was at least a little interesting.

[hetalianhistorian]

Introduction

Hello, everyone! My name is Hetalian Historian and I am a dedicated fan and journalist on documenting all things Hetalia! Ever since getting into the series, I have developed a deep fascination for the franchise, the fandom, and the history itself behind Hetalia overall, including its ups and downs. The way I see it, is that Hetalia is like history itself, there is a certain kind of culture and past that I, personally, have never seen before and that has fascinated me. Thus, I am here to research, learn, journal, discuss, and archive all Hetalia related things as much as possible. Alongside that, it is also out of general love for the franchise, its characters, and contents!

Moving along, here is what you can expect from me to look into:

Writings discussing interesting aspects about Hetalia

Documenting Hetalia's history and its fandom

Official Content Archives

Fandom spotlights (including events, projects, fans, and etc.)

Official News

And more!

As of now, everything is a bit humble, but overtime I will refine the blog and my socials, especially for Youtube. Hopefully one day, I can convert my posts into video essays to allow for accessibility and reach, alongside original content, but until then it's going to be there for documentation purposes. If anyone is interested in following me on other platforms, I do have a linktree! (Just note I'll be mainly using the first four socials, the rest are accounts are dedicated for research use and occasional updates).

One final thing, it's important for me to note this is managed by one person and being accomplished out of my own free time. Everything about this project is completely personal and my sheer love for Hetalia. Even if this blog somehow finds an audience, I want to make it clear that at the end of the day, I am doing this for myself and out of my own personal enjoyment. Of course, I will be doing my best to update as much as I can, but eventually there will be a point where material runs dry, life gets in the way, or I somehow fall out of Hetalia. However, right now, I get to run this blog and I have the ability to find joy and fun within it, so I'll take the chance to see how far this can go!

I'm nervous, yet excited for what is to come! If you are interested in contributing to the blog, I am open for topic ideas, official and fandom news, findings, general help, questions, and more! The best ones to reach out to me would be through my Tumblr, Twitter, and Discord (@hetalianhistorian). Other than that, if you are a fellow Hetalian fan, I hope you'll stick around and the first essay post will be up soon!

And that's it! A cheers to the blog, Hetalia, and the new year! Thank you so much for reading.

- Hetalian Historian

12/28/2023

[gryffindorkxdraws]

Hello, thank you for drawing jackunzel <3

I've got a question: do you have any jackunzel fanfic recommendations?

I'd love to read more about Jack and Rapunzel together <3 I trust your taste 👀😄

Oh and in what app/program did you edit your recent jackunzel videos? They are fun to watch, haha

I wish you great day/night 💕

hi anon!! hehe you're welcome 💙 i'm always game to draw my OTP 💙 for my jackunzel videos, i use capcut! its free to download. and i'm gonna be honest, i haven't read fics in a while 🫠 but i was able to gather a few for you!! hopefully, you'll enjoy them 😭💙

firstly, here are the oneshots

The Sun & Moon Children (oneshot): When the daughter of the sun fell in love with the son of the moon, the earth watched in anticipation for what would undoubtedly be a tragedy.

READ HERE: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9616560/1/The-Sun-Moon-Children

2. Murals of Winter (oneshot): After all, she is a girl locked in a tower with hair more than twice the length of her room. Why wouldn’t there be a boy who wears winter on his sleeves and stirs up snowstorms in her heart?

READ HERE: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20289766

3. January Wedding (oneshot): Jack Frost and Rapunzel Corona get married in January. Or, The story of how Rapunzel Corona became Rapunzel Frost.

READ HERE: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22325986

4. We're Not Good, We're Super (oneshot) (this is my work!): Jack likes to think of himself as the one guy who might just uncover who exactly Spider-Woman is. What he fails to realize is that she might just be closer to him than he thinks.

READ HERE: https://archiveofourown.org/works/41070603

5. This Night Is Sparkling, Don't You Let It Go (oneshot) (this is also my work hehe): Rapunzel feels distant. Like she’s there, but at the same time she’s not. Something about having a disconnection with herself in the party. That is until her eyes landed on him. or an AU where they decide to see where the night would take them

READ HERE: https://archiveofourown.org/works/46529908

6. Jackunzel Coming Of Age Prompt (oneshot)

READ HERE: https://www.tumblr.com/hiccanna-tidbits/735307559599292416/okay-can-i-look-now-not-yet-the-kitchen-is?source=share

7. Are We Out Of The Woods? (oneshot): Ever the dutiful daughter, Rapunzel agrees to make a delivery to someone her parents owe an old favor. But she knows she must beware, for many dangerous creatures roam the heart of the forest. Perhaps even the ones that once claimed her best friend.

READ HERE: https://archiveofourown.org/works/42718821

8. Bloody Valentine (oneshot + extra chapter): Superhero AU It's easy to become cynical when you see the darkest side of humanity every night. It's easy to lose sight of what truly matters, and let it go in a moment of fear. For Jack, the hard part is either coming to grips with the fact he let Rapunzel go, or figuring out a way to get her back.

READ HERE: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5220320/chapters/12037064

now these below are a series if ever you're up for longer stories

9. An Essay of Love (series): Jackson Overland moves to a new city and gets the job of teaching history to a bunch of annoying teens every day. The one thing keeping him from handing in his two-week notice as soon as he arrives is the sunshiney, optimistic art teacher who unlocks not only his classroom but his heart.

READ HERE: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25597147/chapters/62125681

10. Dusk Till Dawn (series): Jackson Overland travels far and wide to find the lost people of Corona to seek vengeance for his fallen home, Luna. Fiercely driven by the memories of his family, he meets a mysterious feral young woman named Rapunzel Flores. Two opposites, forge an unlikely alliance that is destined to change the course of the future.

READ HERE: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25257757/chapters/61231741

11. Among The Stars (series): SCI-FI AU The crew of the Night Fury - Hiccup Haddock (captain), Merida Haddock (first mate), and Jack Frost (Pilot) - have a habit of getting into trouble. Accidentally rescuing Princess Rapunzel of the planet Corona puts them in more trouble than they can deal with... unless Jack can admit he was wrong.

READ HERE: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5149355/chapters/11854694

[compressednerve]

ask game question #3

Thank you so much for the ask!

"3 films you could watch for the rest of your life and not get bored of?"

1: Moon

What an absolute masterpiece of a film. I can't believe it's been 10 years since I first saw this movie, my wretched and terrible brother is the one who showed it to me and it's probably one of the only good things he's ever done in my life. It changed me forever. I was in a really bad place when I first saw it (and what 16yr old girlthing isn't in a bad place around that time?) and something about the love and care that was shown towards Sam by the characters in the movie (I shan't spoil what happens in it, the twist is impeccable) really affected me. In fact, if I remember correctly, I'd seen it in December! So that's quite the anniversary to be reminded of :'). The score is amazing, and the themes about loneliness as a blue collar worker, exploitation by a corporation, the conspiracy, the absolutely miserable isolation that Sam faces, down to the practicality of the set design and practical effects used, and Sam Rockwell's performance just floors me every time considering the circumstances under which he plays. For a few years, I even changed my name and lived it to that of one of the characters in the movie, which isn't something I really do often. I'll let you guess which character.

2. Jacob's Ladder

Yes, I'm using a very non-iconic shot from the movie. Most of the time when you look up Jacob's Ladder, you'll see gifs of the head convulsions, Jacob in the bathtub, the infamous hospital scene with the eyeless nurses, and maybe the party seizure if you're lucky. Truth be told, every scene from Jacob's Ladder is, to me, a masterpiece. The torture of poor, poor Jacob, caught between his wartime CPTSD and his arguable drug trauma, caught in a neverending loop of nightmarish hellscapes indiscernible from reality or dream, desperate to make sense of a world that's perpetually collapsing around him and very little allies to help. The only person who truly loves him is Louis, his guardian angel, his caretaker, his companion- pictured here is him metaphorically and literally rescuing Jacob from Hell, and the scene that immediately follows just blows me away every time with the sheer intimacy on display. It's even crazier in the original script, which I do own a copy of because I'm insane, where Jacob outright professes his love for Louis. I've written quite a few essays about this movie but they'll never see the light of day because I don't trust my ability to articulate myself correctly, but rest assured it could probably fill an eight hour long analysis video. Parasite and I watched this movie for the first time in 2020, when we were taking megadoses of shweed brownies that had 800-1,000mg per brownie for the latter half of August and the entire month of September because it was the first time I'd made edibles and I severely overestimated just how much weed was supposed to go into them. And what did we watch on repeat upwards of 90 times during that time period? Why, Jacob's Ladder of course. It feels fitting to have been so stoned considering half the film's message is a finger wag about irresponsible drug use (or more accurately, irresponsibly and forcibly drugging people without their consent). I will never tire of this movie, and every time I watch it, I discover new things about it, and myself.

3: Hardcore Henry

You may recognize this film style from that "Bad Motherfucker" music video that was popular a few years back, and what a smart cookie you are for that, because it's the same director. What's not to love? Blood, guts, boobies, funny accents, Russian humor, shout-outs to beloved video games, cool car chases, sexy villains/heroes, a great score, and above all else, an independent film makers dream that became actualized. It's inspiring to me what Ilya Naishuller was able to do with such a small cast and such a small budget. You may be thinking to yourself, "A first-person POV action movie sounds like it would make me motion sick!" and normally you'd be right. But Ilya got you covered on that my friend, because he said himself that he gets motion sick easily. I, too, get motion sick easily and am prone to seizures with jittery movements on-screen. He took that into account and with a little movie magic in the first 10 minutes of the film used some pretty cool tricks to acclimate the viewer to the way it all moves around, and it's actually a very smooth ride considering most of it is filmed on a gopro attached to a torture device wrapped around the actors' heads. I beg of you, watch this movie. I saw it in theater in 2016 on a total whim, I was bored one day and I saw a trailer for it during a fugue state and thought to myself, "how odd, I can't tell if this is a video game or not, well I have a little extra cash so I might as well check this out" because there wasn't anything better to do with my time, and I was blown away. I ended up seeing it three more times in the theater and bought the bluray the second it was released. This is another movie that Parasite and I ended up watching on repeat in 2021, we'd put it on while he got ready for work.

Oh, and the Jimmy/Henry yaoi is real. Also, there's straight up a male/male kiss in it? I love that. Great work, everyone.

[weaselbeaselpants]

Lily, I did/do agree with you on some fandom takes, especially back during the DownWithMolestia days. Heck I agree with a lot of your takes in current year. Even if I agreed with you on everything you say I'd still fucking drop you and hope every single one of your fans wakes up and does so to for the right reasons --that you're a predator/lying abuser, not that you hate Gay Rocks in Space-- too.

Like, you wanna hear proof some folks' who I not only liked but REALLY like their videos and still absolutely think are in the wrong?

JonTron and Brad Jones.

I still find myself quoting their damn videos every now and again because god damnit that shit is/was funny, sue me. I loved CinemaSnob especially and god JonTron's videos were so much fun.

Too bad JonTron said some of the worst, most horrendously antiblack shit I've ever heard and has never fucking apologized for it or even BEGUN to have an iDubbz moment. I believe Pewdiepie feels+understands what he did was wrong more than JonTron and that's a bad sign. Jon was funny, a white person. Don't care. I'm never going to follow anything he makes again because the stuff he had to say was heinous and no it doesn't just "go away" because another white yter is in trouble for this kind of thing or it's been so many years since his 'canceling' and 'doesn't matter'. Really?

CinemaSnob is less racist (publicly) but he showed his true colors by publicly choosing to stay with his toxic friends and showing he was a two-sided jerk, and then made up lies about doxxing and harassment just to sweeten the deal. What he did (while roping Double Toasted in no less) was straight up admit that he doesn't care about any of the shit leveled at Channel Awesome, even after CA themselves admitted to hiding a sexual predator, because "he'd still have a career" even after he hurt anybody. Say all you want about any yter, breadtube or whatever, being callous and 'uncaring' or blocking ppl that just disagree w them- "apologize even if you don't mean it = dumb", "Logan Paul filmed a dead body and he still has a career", it's that side you showed of yourself, Brad, that is always going to make me actually genuinely hate myself for quoting your old videos or seeing you show up in an old Phelan or Allison vid.

Whether it be personally or politically, you can look like an ass and even the biggest fans of your work are gonna be shaken up and drop you for it-- to which you'll probably say they were never really "your REAL fans" for being "sensitive" w really it's just people having independence and critical thinking.

I would not be the person I am now if I didn't disagree/look into the drama buzzing around my personal fav yters like Lindsay Ellis and Jenny Nicholson with an open mind. I know (of, not rlly know) these women and their careers and the points where they were definitely getting harassment and if there's any credible basis for shitty behavior they've done - no matter how I feel about their work, I DON'T want to defend it just because I have this parasocial comfortzone in their essays. I don't want to entertain hate campaigns and lolcow farmers, I want to always do my due diligence and genuinely know "wait wtf did 'x' say about 'x'." In the case of folks like Ellis or PanPizza or Quinton Reviews here's usually always some degree of nuance or-"yes soandso isn't a [thing I thought they were cuz of drama I saw], but I'm personally allowed to not like them bcuz of how they handled these accusations"-vibes. Valid asf. That's me with some of the people I watch, like Wendigoon. It's fine.

In the cases of JonTron, Brad Jones, Emily Youcis and now Lily Orchard....no. Fuck this. I'm an adult and it's not the quality of your work you make whatsoever, it's all about your personality. If you are shitty and vile, possibly even criminal (hate speech should count as criminal, Youcis) and you don't even begin to care that you are any of those things...yeah why should I give you the time of day or treat your work like it's different from you as a person?

[goodluckclove]

How do you deal with a bad writing day after hyping yourself up for a productive one? I've been trying to comfort myself, but it's difficult.

It's entirely normal to criminalize yourself for not meeting your own expectations. If you're young or just starting out it's pretty par for the course to feel like a developing craft is something that'll flicker out if you're not constantly fanning the flame and feeding it tinder. It definitely took me a few completed drafts before I had enough confidence to go a month without working on a project and not tell myself that I've lost it forever.

There's still flashes of anxiety. I imagine it's true across the board for artists. But at least for me it's a lot easier to manage after time.

You feel like you failed? Okay, great! You're going to fail a lot as a writer. It's inevitable, and lucky for us the stakes are pretty low. You have to really TRY to like crucially fail in writing by like lying about being a minority to get a book deal or being an actual criminal. Other than that it's more likely you'll just write things that don't work, or get rejected from publishers, or put something up and get either unasked for criticism or blanket silence. It's pretty hard at first, but it's VERY useful to shrug it off when things like that don't go your way and just move on.

Of course you're disappointed. You wanted to write and it didn't go the way you wanted. But there's a lot of nuance here. Maybe your version of productive isn't the productive your writing needed right now. You could've written a few lines that feel like nothing but later on solidify something important or change the course of your plan. All writing is useful. ANY writing is useful. Writers like Stephen King have a daily schedule of like 2k words almost every day of the year, and that might seem like the goal since he's very successful. But also I've read a lot of King's work and like a third of it is insane nonsense. ALSO also Stephen King's writing schedule is likely less to do with the discipline of being an Inherently Better Writer and more to do with the amount of coke he did (I.E. a ton of it, nearly constantly).

And if you didn't write a single goddamned word? Yeah man, that actually means you're bad and failed and should probably quit writing and get a job as Old Navy as the in-house Sad Guy. That's also fine. It's normal. It's probably good, actually. Artists need to do things other than art - both cool adventures like going a museum or a park and being Artsy in Public, and also boring errands. You need to be in the world as much as you can. It's crucial, especially for younger creatives. There's a chance you ended up not writing and instead like just fell down some sort of online scroll spiral - and yes, that's a bummer. Net negative. But it's not a moral failure, especially when so much of social media is literally engineered to get you to do that.

Listen to your body. Writing probably makes you feel good - hopefully, at least. Whatever you did instead maybe didn't make you feel good. Is it because it's unhealthy and disregulating, or was it fun but you felt you were supposed to do something else instead?

If it's the former take note and try and substitute the behavior next time it happens. If I don't feel like I'm able to write the way I want to I like to watch a cool movie. Maybe go out somewhere, either to do house errands or maybe see a Nature. Lately I've been playing Terraria and listening to a podcast or video essays. You wanted this to happen and something got in the way. That sucks, but you keep doing this and it'll happen a lot.

If it's the latter, be kind to yourself. There's a Little Creature in your chest and he's afraid that if he stops pushing towards the thing that's important to you he won't be able to work up the effort again. His name is Ryan and he's very tired and disappointed in himself. He is maybe a fat racoon and he has little grubby hands. You should maybe go ahead and tell Ryan its okay. Give him a grape and a pat on the head and promise the world won't end.

In short: you're okay. Regardless of the circumstances. Feel your feelings, but at a point it's no longer productive. If you need the validation - I am a working writer, produced and published (both self-pub and in journals), and I promise you it is not a sin to have an off day. I also have off days. You can come out of the time out corner. Have a snack - fruit, maybe, or something with protein. Maybe make yourself a fun drink. Get back to work when you're ready.

[infernothechaosgod]

Should I make a video essay about epic mickey? (Rewrite)

i already made this post once but Im rewritting it becuse It looked too much like someone else's take And I have much more to say now that I thought about this post longer

So as we all know Theres alot of epic mickey video essays on youtube however alot of them Are beasicly Roasting the game as if it was made in 2023 in this weirdly sugarcoded way so you'll feel bad for liking the game but you'll also hear good stuff about it so you'll FEEL like it's good critisism but trust me its just the complement sandwitch

(complement sandwitch is when someone gives you a complement and Then critisism either deserved or not then another complement so you'll feel better...but it doesnt work too well with bad critisism lmao)

Theres alot takes about how The game doesnt look good enough and Im like...Good people, IT WERE 2010s! What do you expect? Not only computers could handle less then but also making games was VERY DIFFRENT and you never should come to a game from 2010s with expectations of good graphic, seriously never, Modeling and such were also very diffrent

Now I say I agree with some things The game could be a bit darker I think a bigger exploration of how oswald or anyone in fact feels about being forgotten Could be great, like it's horrifying and oswald Went from very beloved by audience to fully forgotten in a very short amount of time for a toon Also some concept arts Imo should make it into game and enemies could look creepier, also the morality system could be more effective like there could be a line saying "you notice oswald looks around more than usualy...prehaps he's looking if there are any witnesses around" Or something like that Like mickey litellary has a weapon capeable of erasing you from reality but also capeable of making beautiful things and fixing peoples problems i could argue it deserves more exploration

But the thing is...the game is amazing

It is, I hate most things from my childhood now becuse I went through critique era that im semi still in and I revisited things from my childhoot and most of them sucked lmao (being a writer I just cried from dissapointed sometimes) but epic mickey? It was still amazing, and 2d parts to this day look GORGEOUS The story is great and I do agree that the oryginal plot for second part should have stayed but it got replaced by a Still good idea

Also its so SO creative! It uses the fact the characters are cartoons to its fullest really theres no other game that I know of where you go into old projectors and where you can paint and erase your sorounding with accualy good explanation The mage was creative as hell its amazing

Also

The whole time you play youre suppoust to play for the plot not for the "gamer experience" Becuse it may suprise you but You dont HAVE to get all the pins and tickets, you can for fun But no one is forcing you to and whining about how long it took to 100% the game is not a good critique, you did this to yourself bro

The reviews or essays are often beasicly copypasted from eachother, I watched like 4 essays and reviews but it felt like one dude talking in 4 diffrent voices and repeating himself it's baaaaad

Epic mickey was a great game and it deserves a remake 200% and explaining how "it feel from its grace" isnt gonna be helpful

I wanna make a video about How there are things to change definitley (CURSE YOU WEIRD CAMERA) but its still a great game with some amazing plot And with great effect on younger audience at the time who played it

So help a boy out (again) and tell me do you think I should make that video essay? It may be long But I think you'll see it as a good thing haha

[villainsblog97]

Xdinary Heroes:

Waking up next to you

Summary: Good Morning my lovelys! How would our 6 heroes be waking up next to you? This follows routines and things that you guys do in the morning.

Warnings: Extreme cuteness!

Scenario: Boyfriend AU, fluffy fluff, romance, (so sweet a dentist would forbid it)

☀️Gunil:

(Now that I have found the Gunil stans!)

Okay so Gunil loves you so much

Like as much as his band mates

That's love my friend

And he works hard for what he does

So he doesn't get to spend a lot of time with you

So every moment he can spend with you is precious

And in the mornings

When he wakes up and sees your sleeping face

Boy needs a minute

The smile on his face is so heartwarming

He could just lay there all day

Watching you dream your beautiful dreams

Wondering to himself what you're dreaming about

Eventually your eyes slightly twitch

And you take in a deep breath before opening your eyes

Gunil's touch is gentle

He makes sure of it

Lots of morning head kisses

And deep voiced "Good morning"

(Stay with me guys!)

Gunil then starts his day

Doing his morning skin care routine

And you help him with his hair

Sometimes its vice versa

But while he's getting dressed you prepare a healthy and nutritious breakfast.

☀️Jungsu:

(Ngl... this whole scenario was all because of his morning voice in the XH Begins video logs!)

Jungsu would definitely hold you in his arms all night

Unless you didn't want him to

Who would deny Kim freakin Jungsu?

(That's what I thought)

Anywho

It's gonna go two ways with Jungsu

If it's a work day

He'll have to set his alarm

And he'll wake you up gently

Because you asked him to

You wanna see him before he goes

But

If it's his day off

Tons and tons of morning cuddles

You two will be lazy af!

You'll just lay in his arms and he'll just hold you and talk about different topics with you

Like I said the morning voice

(I'll leave you all to just picture it in your heads)

Then you two finally decide to get out of bed

Jungsu helps you with washing your face

It probably gets messy

But he's so good at massaging the face cream into your skin

Like it's so relaxing

Then he'll give you quick kiss

Now you two are in the kitchen

Making breakfast

Music is playing on your speaker

And of course Jungsu is singing every song like its a concert

(Yes I know I talk about Jungsu's vocals a lot leave me alone)

☀️Gaon:

Oh our sweet little JIseok

Like Jungsu

Very clingy

Like he loves sleeping with his arms around you

And yours around him

He feels at peace with his baby in his arms

When his dreams are over

And he's woken up by the sunlight

He'll look down to see you still hugging him tightly

Eyes fluttering so gently

What did he do to get so lucky?

He'd hold your sleeping figure in his arms

And press a gentle kiss to your forehead

God he just loves you so much it sometimes hurts

His gentle touch would bring you out of your sleep

But you'd hug him tighter and groan as you wanted to sleep longer

"Good morning Jagiya" He'd whisper

Lots more head kisses

Like every 5 minutes

Jiseok would eventually convince you to get up

When you heard his stomach growl

So you two set off into the kitchen

Jiseok makes some coffee

And you make some pancakes

(He looks like a pancake guy)

Then you guys talk about what you have to do today

Same thing with Jungsu

If he has to leave early he'll tell you his schedule

But if he has a day off

He'll tell you about everything he needs to do

Only to not do any of it and just spend time with his favorite person in the whole world.

☀️ Ode:

(Nation's Boyfriend coming through!)

Oh Seungmin

(Yes I used his full name)

Boy's got every villain so delulu it's probably made him delulu!

But that's not what we're here to talk about

(I could make a whole essay on that)

Okay Seungmin is the ultimate boyfriend

So you get the whole boyfriend experience!

Lazy days are his favorite

No alarms

No early mornings

No work

Just him and you

The one person he loves more than Starbucks

And that's saying something

He'd roll over and meet your sleeping face

Now he's just in heaven

He'd pull the blanket over your shoulders more before leaving a kiss on your head

(I'm a sucker for forehead kisses!)

A small smile forming on his lips as he watches you sleep

You'd finally wake up and just smile as you stretched

He'd also take this opportunity to steal a couple kisses

Soft

Lazy kisses

(I'm sorry guys, I'll pay for your oxygen tanks)

He's definitely gonna take you out for a morning Starbucks date

He knows your order by heart

You know his as well but he never lets you order

Then you guys grab your drinks, and head to a bakery for a warm muffin

Then you guys get back home

Relaxing on the couch

Drinking your coffee, and enjoying being next to each other

☀️Junhan:

Hyeongjun's favorite thing in the world

Is waking up to you

Like you're the only person he ever shows that much affection to

He's not usually one to be so close to someone physically

But with you it's different

He can be close to you

And when he wakes up to see your eyes closed

Slow breathing

Your hand under your head

He just can't help but look at you

With the softest eyes

(I'm gonna cry again)

Gently brushing away a strand of your hair away from your face with his long fingers

Making sure he doesn't disturb your peaceful slumber

When you wake up

He's probably looking at his phone

(Well he can't let you know he was smiling at you and looking at you like a puppy!)

And you just scoot in closer to him

Leaving a little kiss on his shoulder

Now he's slightly blushing

And laughing a little

"What was that for?"

"Because I love you"

(I'm listening to the Impossible cover and it's made this like 1000 Xs more emotional!)

Hyeongjun would laugh an get all shy

But then he'd get up and sit on a chair in the bathroom as you fixed his hair

Because it's your favorite thing to do

And he loves the feeling

It was the sweet gestures towards each other that you both loved

☀️Jooyeon:

Now we all know Jooyeon is the hardest to get up in the mornings

So with that being said

You have to wake him up

Oh...

But how could you?

He looks so peaceful sleeping

Nope you're not waking him up just yet

You lay next to him

Your hand supporting your head

You just can't help but admire your sleeping boyfriend

(*Inhales deeply*)

You brush his hair out of his face

And just take a minute

Thanking the higher ups for giving you this man

And the moments you get to spend with him

"Are you enjoying the view?" You finally hear

Busted...

You laugh a little and play with his hair a bit

"I was actually yes"

He'd get all shy and embarrassed before throwing the blankets over his head

You'd laugh as you pull them off his head

"It's not time to get up yet" He'd whine

Pulling you into his arms

(*Inhaling intensifies*)

But eventually you start getting hungry

So it's time to get up and start the day

Jooyeon slips on his glasses

He'd be strumming on his guitar while you cook some breakfast

Singing a gentle melody

(I'm gonna stop there before I hide myself away in a closet and cry for hours)