#once again not editing these so they are just like Sit For 20 Mins And Write fills. just. disclaiming

[vroombeams]

30. come play for markoscar

It's one of the simple pleasures in life, getting your dick sucked.

Mark's so bonelessly comfortable it should be illegal. Kicked back in his favourite chair, in his favourite robe, with late afternoon sun streaming in through the window and Oscar between his legs. He's not an animal; of course he's made sure Oscar's got a pillow to kneel on. He knows himself, and he knows these days, how he could sit here for hours with Oscar's mouth on him.

He knows when Oscar's gotten impatient because the suction turns up from about a seven to a seventeen.

He's gotten so good at this. At dragging it out, sucking Mark off in that long, languid way that he particularly likes. It's part of the charm of being a retired driver, learning to take things slow. But Oscar is not retired, in fact, and is significantly less inclined to stay patiently on his knees for actual hours.

Mark grunts when Oscar throats him. He makes this strangled noise when he does it, every time. Something that's almost a gag, that wraps back in on itself as Oscar swallows all the way down until Mark can feel the press of his nose in his pubes. He's not been looking, honestly. Staring instead up at the slats of light beamed across his living room wall, pondering the beauty of the universe and all that.

Oscar bobs his head, throat constricting. Mark grunts again, knee twitching, pressing a thumb to Oscar's shoulder.

"Gonna come," he sighs, and Oscar pulls up a bit to properly suck him off through it.

When he comes it's like the light of the room just sort of sinks into him. Warm and soft and golden, so completely satisfying that Mark could probably fall asleep right here and now. And he has before, knocked out after a good orgasm, the reverse of what he thinks Oscar might call post-nut clarity.

Mark hums, blindly tucking a bit of hair behind Oscar's ear as he starts to soften in his mouth. It's warm enough in here that when Oscar does pull off it's not a rush of cold air on his wet dick; still satisfying, still comfy.

He feels Oscar moving, only opens his eyes when Oscar actually climbs up into his lap. Mark's amenable. Obviously. If he were a decade or two younger he might even be able to get it up again and really give Oscar what he wants, but for now wanking him off will have to do.

Oscar's face is a bit pinched, which is par for the course, considering how hard he is when he presses up against Mark's stomach. He twists a dainty hand into the back of Mark's hair, plunges the other into his own sweats. Oh, good, Mark's not going to have to do any work at all. Huge W, as the kids say. Maybe he'll even be able to conk out for a nap after this.

He lets it happen when Oscar dips to kiss him. Opens his mouth to deepen it and—

He doesn't recoil, but he's admittedly just a bit shocked when Oscar dumps a mouthful of come directly onto Mark's tongue.

Mark has a normal relationship with his own come, which is to say he generally keeps it out of his own mouth. He's polite about it, of course, he's not a prude. Of course he'll kiss after Oscar blows him.

This is a bit much to wrap his brain around.

But Oscar doesn't let up and Mark's really too stunned to stop it. And it seems like it's really doing it for Oscar; he's moaning a bit, sucking on Mark's tongue, fist speeding on his dick between them.

He comes in record time, basically seconds after Mark gets with the program and starts—ugh—pushing his own come around between their mouths. It's a real mess, spilling out a bit when Oscar breaks away to groan. Even more a mess, Oscar coming all over Mark's bare chest where he's left his robe open.

Oscar sits back. His mouth is wet and sticky and shining vaguely pearlescent. There's a thick bead of come running down his chin. It'd be extremely appealing if Mark weren't hyper-aware of it smeared all over his own face.

"Nice," Oscar says, exhausted, running his whole hand through the mess of jizz on Mark's chest and making it much, much worse. A shower is going to be unavoidable, now.

So much for getting a post-blowie nap in.

send kink(s) and a ship(s) and maybe i will write more hell things

[lemonhemlock]

finally sitting down to write my barbieheimer review and coming out as an oppenheimer hater so DO NOT PROCEED if you are annoyed by criticism of it or do not want to hear it or whatever. seriously. if you liked the movie, good for you. i did not. this is going to be a long rant. i am so not joking right now.

disclaimer that i went to the cinema with the very best of intentions, wanting and fully expecting to like oppenheimer. while that didn't happen, i loved the double feature experience and do not regret it. i spent the entire day at the mall with my boyfriend and we just had a fun, carefree day. i've wanted to see both and had planned to for a long time and it was great. v interesting as a cultural zeitgeist moment.

that being said, the reason oppenheimer leaves me cold is because it is a fundamentally incoherent movie that doesn't know what it's about, tries to do everything all at once and succeeds in nothing. each hour of running time could have easily been a separate movie: one about oppenheimer's life leading to los alamos, another one about the actual creation of the atomic bomb and another one with the robert downey jr plot.

there are huge disadvantages to trying to cram so many different story beats into one singular movie and, if you ask me, i wouldn't advise anyone to do it. but nolan strikes me as the kind of overrated ~artiste that rarely hears no for an answer. this movie was in DIRE need of a streamlining. you can hire the greatest editor in history, but if you give him that script, they're not going to be able to salvage it.

i thought the editing was consistently bad throughout the movie, but especially atrocious in the first part about oppenheimer's early life. the result of this lack of plot focus is that the movie basically consists in a string of tiny scenes that last for seconds sometimes, all meshed together like a freaking montage. now, to each their own, but i cannot emphasize how much i hate this storytelling choice. no, but i genuinely despise it. whenever i see it, in movies or television, it just drives me up the wall. you can say it's a specific pet peeve of mine or whatever, maybe it doesn't bother others as much, but i honestly do not respect it. i think it's categorically lazy, something we've seen in a hundred different movies already and the most simplistic way of doing an exposition dump. i abhor the feeling of watching a mashup passing itself off as some kind of creative experiment in storytelling.

now, had this overused, lackadaisical introduction lasted a reasonable amount of time (maybe 20 min?), perhaps my stance would not have been so riled up. but it went on for AGES. i think the whole exposition part lasted for about an hour and coupled with the hurried procession of unconnected scenes and the asinine marvel movie semi-upbeat background music, the result was just cringe. and i specifically choose this term because this movie is touted as being a milestone moment in cinema or whatever. genuinely insane to me.

cillian murphy meets florence pugh for the first time and within seconds she starts berating him for not joining the communist party. who speaks like that? no natural progression to the conversation at all, we have to get from point A to point B and that's surely more important. you blink again and they're having sex. she stops mid-act because she has the sudden, irrepressible urge to check out his library (??). she makes him recite his famous aphorism from sanskrit while shoving the Bhagavad Gita in his face. the man is craning his neck in the most uncomfortable sex position ever. there is nothing natural about this, just stilted dialogue and an edgy highschooler's interpretation of a cool flirtation. i struggle to even call it that because they don't even get to flirt. too many conversations in this film sound genuinely inorganic.

everything is so rushed. a three-hour long movie should NOT feel rushed. but this is the natural consequence of trying to cram so many things into it: the scenes are too short and, because of that, lack build-up and, because of that, the atmosphere suffers greatly, the actors don't have time to act, the relationships between them feel forced and the overall movie feels like it intentionally won't allow you to linger or catch your breath because then you'll figure out it has nothing to say. there is hardly any physics in it. there is hardly any social or philosophical commentary. the last third of the movie turns into this random whodunit / who-framed-oppenheimer type of scooby doo plot. that scene with rdj unraveling his evil plot to that young man feels lifted out of an agatha christie novel. why would rdj even care about what that green boy thinks of him? well, it's because that lad is the audience stand-in, of course. another stereotypical storytelling trick we've seen a million times before that nolan resorts to in his quest to create a "masterpiece".

there are some VERY talented people in this cast. a genuine tour-de-force when it comes to acting skills, even in cameo roles. yet no chance of showing any of that. they're just reciting lines because there is no time for anything else. there is no time to let their talent and performance shine. yes, not even cillian murphy, the titular character. i know that man can act because i've seen him for over a decade in various productions. not in oppenheimer though. there's no time. it feels like they're trying to read out to me the entire encyclopaedia britannica in 10 minutes.

i struggle to identify the theme or point of the movie. i heard nolan say it's about the consequences of one's actions. bitch, where? i'm not joking right now, there's like maybe 5 minutes of exploring that in a 3h-movie. i need everyone to stop being so unserious for real. i admit that i haven't been actively searching, but i haven't encountered any criticism either. is everyone just pretending to like this movie because they're afraid of being labelled a philistine? is this an emperor's new clothes type of situation? this whole previous discourse about how people will get bored or need to pay attention to what's happening on screen... there is nothing difficult or philosophical about oppenheimer. it's a very straightforward movie.

to me, it feels like nolan took a very interesting topic in and of itself, namely the creation of the atomic bomb, and did nothing interesting with it. he's just serving me facts about oppenheimer* with little to no commentary attached and a tiny amount of artistic interpretation. i say that because it has, like, that one scene when oppenheimer is imagining the flesh melting off of his audience while giving a war propaganda speech, meant to symbolize his conflicting views. the stream-of-consciousness element could have been an interesting lens through which to tell this story, but it was way under-utilized. this project could have slapped actually had it been filmed exclusively through oppenheimer's POV like an A24 horror movie.

*i say facts but in reality i need to actually fact-check to weed out the fictional elements bc i know next to nothing about this man, other than him spearheading the manhattan project

anyway, it's true that i am being harsh with this movie also because of the (undeserved) hype surrounding it and the inevitable ovations attached to any nolan production. but, imo, it is disappointing for a filmmaker of his calibre, with his experience and resources and the goodwill surrounding him to put out such fundamentally lazy nonsense

onto barbie now. first of all, yes, they're like apples and oranges, but one point of comparison is that this is a a very self-aware movie that never loses sight of what it's about and doesn't meander or diverge pointlessly from its main themes and message. after dismantling oppenheimer, i can't claim that barbie is going to revolutionize cinema or destroy the patriarchy or strengthen womanly bonds worldwide, but it's very on point. it's visually stunning, has a lot of easter eggs and cute details, catchy tunes and just general preciousness. everyone playing a doll was actively adorable. the re-watch quality feels promising, it has a very good chance of becoming a cult classic. it was heartwarming and endearing without being too overly sugary & funny without insulting jokes.

the choice to depict men as reductive and an afterthought as counter-point to how women are often portrayed on screen as accessories was indeed interesting. so was the idea of boys and girls diverging once they "discover" patriarchy. now, don't get me wrong, barbie is not a complicated movie either. its feminism is pretty simplistic, no doubt about it, but it doesn't take itself too seriously either. i do wish that america ferrera's mid-movie speech about women's position in society was a little more refined because those ideas were indeed very basic and kind of eye-roll worthy, like a feminism 101 class. i could have done without helen mirren's voice over (it didn't really add a lot, imo, although the joke about margot robbie was funny). the intro spoofing 2001 space odyssey was a little too on-the-nose as well, so i can't say it's not without a couple of hiccups and cringe moments.

nonetheless, barbie is, by no means, a short movie either. clocking in at 114 min, the pendulum swings towards the "long" side of running times. but, as opposed to oppenheimer, it feels neither rushed, nor drawn out. the pacing is just right. the actors in barbie have the space to shine, even those in small roles. the plot has room to breathe. relationships have room to grow. disregarding the subject matter (in an attempt at objectivity, as one might prefer one topic over the other), strictly from the perspective of storytelling techniques, editing, cinematography & character development, barbie is plainly the superior movie.

[a-room-of-my-own]

For screen time: I bought (the app? Software?) Freedom, and it is absolutely the best thing I have found. It will block the sites that you ask it at the times you ask it to and once it’s up and running that’s it, the site is blocked even if you reboot your computer, etc. Only thing is you can edit the times (when a session is not running). To get over that I blocked YouTube, for example, all day except for between 5 and 7am. If I REALLY need to watch something, I have to get up at dawn. My screen time on YouTube in April was a total for about 1 hour for the month, down from about 9 hours a day (an exaggeration but barely). My next purge will be Tumblr (I’m thinking of being off here for Pride Month lol, for my own sanity). What I have found more difficult however, is picking reading up again. I can do without (some) websites (still a work in progress!) but that hasn’t equates to having the patience, concentration or focus for reading. In comparison, books don’t give me the same dopamine hit, and that has been a real barrier :/ I am also trying to go down the route of organising more social activities (shorter but more regular) and atm I’m really busy with work, which has helped. However unfortunate, it is reassuring to see we all struggle with this, and it’s not just a gen z thing. I am not proud of my screen time and I’m a fully fledged adult! Please let us know how you get on, if you’re okay with that. I could use a support group!

Absolutely ok with that! When I got sick with long covid (so between 2020 and summer 2023) I couldn’t read more than a few lines at a time for literal months and I was so exhausted that I had to rest at home every time I was off if I wanted to be able to go to work.

So being in my bed / couch watching videos, playing games and reading articles (I could still read the news / short articles) became a habit, and now I’m better I’m trying to go back to healthier ways.

Also since a surge of activity could turn into a covid relapse I’m kind of hyper aware of my fatigue levels and tend to « freeze » when I feel tired now and immediately sit down / lie down / take a break. But it’s turned into « let’s lie down until I feel like I can get up again » which was fine when I was sick but now I think I’m tiring myself. Lying down with my phone just exhausts my brain.

My go to method would be « do something every time you want to use your phone » but the need to grab it is real especially when the things to do are random chores. I’ve just spent like 20 min researching random stuff 🤣

So I’m gonna try apps and training myself like a border collie (fun activities, snacks and walkies instead of phone time) and see if that works !

[dynananarmy]

REPUTATION|| Min Yoongi

Summary:

You were in the top. There was no person in the world who didn't know your name, either for your success or your reputation, believing that the only thing you should do is smile, be a good girl, don't force your opinions on people, and NOT for any reason deny the dating rumors. But then a gummy smile and a sweet accent came to change all your believe system, from a friends with benefits to falling in love, you encounter a new fear: would he love you despite your reputation

Pairings: Idol!Min Yoongi(SUGA) x singer!reader   

Warnings: distorted body image and unwarranted fear of gaining weight. Unhealthy habits like starvation, underage alcohol consuption. Mild smut and age gap (Yoongi is 25 and reader is 20) but everything is consensual). If i miss something please let me know.

Gorgeous

You should take it as a compliment That I got drunk and made fun of the way you talk You should think about the consequence Of your magnetic field being a little too strong And I got a boyfriend, he's older than us He's in the club doing, I don't know what You're so cool, it makes me hate you so much

You make me so happy, it turns back to sad, yeah There's nothing I hate more than what I can't have Guess I'll just stumble on home to my cats Alone, unless you wanna come along, oh

Anxiety was a familiar feeling, a daily occurrence even before you knew how to call it. The constant fear of making the wrong move, not filling everybody's expectations. But it never gets easier, walking a red carpet was nerve wracking at 20 like it was when you were 13, but expectations were higher, every single album need it to be different, different  sound, different style, you need it to be more mature but not to sexy because then you were to provocative for kids who follow you, but not to demure because then you are a prim. And then, you were too fat, and then too skinny, or you would have the nice flat stomach that people expect but you didn't have the hourglass figure. So everything you stand in an outfit risky enough for you, you would shake like a leaf, praying that the apple and the water that you had eaten would not somehow make you look bloated. That you contour was blended, that the powder under your eyes would not flash in camera. 

You were about to promote your second single of your album, a song who was for a ex manager and ended up seeing as a call out for war for a singer whom you were friends but ended up splitting ways when she started dating an ex boyfriend, an ex boyfriend that you don't actually love but it was still awkward going out with the new girlfriend of your ex. Your team takes it as publicity, even if there was not an actual feud, good or bad, publicity is publicity, and so the music video only seems to spark even more fire. Still you invited all of your friends, friends that you met through other friends, in fashion shows or while performing in lingerie runways, the kind of friends that you partied with in your mansion in Coney Island or the one in Malibu. But that only sends a spark of worry, appearing in a music video with models with perfect bodies only makes you even more insecure about your own, and you were scared about what people would think about it.

A tug in your arm pulled you out of the dazed of the camera's flash and your thoughts, Calum King was a producer, a handsome embodiment of masculinity, a strong build body, a short beard, barely there but enough to let you know that he was a man. He was older than you by a lot, not enough to be scandalous but enough to raise a few eyebrows.

 He smile and you copied and hold his arm to the cameras, the lady assisting the red carpet gesture you to move and once you were out of the sight of the camera you let a shaky breath a pound in the head and the emptiness of your stomach make you feel dizzy and your publicist move quickly, holding a hard candy to you.

“Are you okay?” Calum asks, still holding you, you nod immediately and put the candy in your mouth.

“I´m good, the lights make me feel light headed but nothing that a little bit of sugar does´n fix” you say tasting the candy, feeling a little bit less tired, he nods but his sight was already far away from you. 

“Baby, i´m going to say hello to a few friends, I¨ll see you in our seats, okay?” He doesn't wait for an answer, his manager following behind, you let a sigh of relief, relieved that you don't have to keep pretending anymore, Calum and you met a few months ago while visiting a friend of your to the studio, a paparazzi saw you having coffee and after that you kept seeing each other, he would be your date in events and to the world, you were official, but you didn't even be intimate,barely hold hands while walking in the streets, or kiss each other more than a few pecks when winning a prize, but even that, it felt forced. Your publicist looks away from her phone to look at you and gives you an indifferent look.

“A new korean band is in here, apparently they are very famous and are contending against you for one of the awards, maybe you should go and see them so people see that you support new talents”

Curiosity sparks within you  “Korean band, is it BTS?” you asked, sipping your water you publicist arch an eyebrow

“Yes, did you know them?” she looks rarely interested, you nod reminiscing how  a few weeks ago you had stumbled on a fan edit of you and one of the members titled “1997 golden babies” seeing the dark haired boy dancing and performing with that much passion caught your attention, looking at his name and thus his group, fascinated enough that you had expend a few hour looking at the music videos and some of their performances, a bubble of excitement grew in your stomach making you feel energized again and you started to walk knowing your publicist was going to take you to them, skipping to some people you got to the corner where a group of at least 10 men stand, you immediately felt short and tiny and intimidated but you put your confident face and wait for your publicist to talk with one of the men, who yo assume was their manager, he look surprised and his gazed fall to you where you standing sandwiched between your bodyguards, he nod and went to say something to the remaining men 7 of them wipe their heads instantly to you and you smile, you make the remaining and they scatter in formation, pushing the taller men in front, he gives you a smile and flashed with a set of dimples.

“Hii, is so nice to meet you guys” You break the ice, you scanned every single one of them, from the tall broad shoulder one to Jungkook, the one of the edit and then your eyes fall to one of them, instantly draw for the way he looks at you, like he knew something your eyes goes back to the taller guy as he start to talk.

“It's so incredible to meet, we are big fans of your music” he says, you had heard that a lot but he sound genuine and the rest of the boy nodded, your eyes went back to the guy with the feline eyes and you see something that you had seen before but rarely from another artist, admiration, but also understanding, like he understanded something and he was fascinated by it. 

“Are you performing tonight?” you asked trying to shake the feeling that he was reading you like a book he understands the language. 

“Ummm, no, not tonight, hopefully someday”  he looked a little ashamed but that only made you feel more admiration for them, they are escalating little by little.

“Id watched some of your performance” a chorus of ¨whoas¨ breaks their silence and you smile wider “You would have made us look like kids beside you, you are truly amazing” you compliment, the words flooding with ease, all of them let a ¨thank you¨ and when you meet eyes with the feline eyed boy he gives you the most beautiful and shy gummy smile, something inside you felt warm and fuzzy and you enjoy it so much that you wish it never went away. Your publicist asked for a picture and you stand with them.

The flash was quick, you changed the pose and at the same time you felt a delicate brush of fingers in your back. Tingles run down your spine and your hair stands, how was it possible that a man could make you feel that way without talking, without knowing him? You didn't even know his name, or how he was, he could be an asshole. 

The camera stop flashing and the warm fingers leave your trembling body (you didn't know if it was of starvation or the adrenaline running through your veins) You look at him, the man with the gummy smile, cat-like eyes and the rose petal lips, he bow and you did the same as a reflex, that make him smile fully and the giddy, warm feeling bubble in your stomach all the way up your chest. You broke eye contact and with warm cheeks you went to hug the taller guy hugging all of them (not without almost melting in gummy smile boy, and breathing deeply his mainly citrus smell).

Your entrance was cut out by your manager, who led you backstage and you hope you bump into them, to talk to him, to hear him and let his fingers pay with your skin, but you were immediately trap in the changing room pulling other set of clothes and when you get out your publicist was waiting with a mint and a glass of ice you chew while letting the makeup artist  retouch your makeup.

You had already stood up 5 times to receive an award and Top Social Artist was the last nomination before going to change for your performance. Sitting on the front row with Calum on your side being the perfect supporting boyfriend and with Zendaya on the other side beside her a bunch of other models friends, big names in the industry who appeared in the music video that had already premiered a few awards ago. And although you should've be worried if you would win the category you were already seeing black spots, nausea and heavy eyelids accompanying, and sitting beside with the most beautiful, tallest, slimmest, women of the moment didn't make you feel better, you could barely hear anything but the sound of blood pumping through your ears but after hearing your name and the loud cheers of your fans a smile appear in your clammy face, you wonder if you could even stand to get  the award if you win, a louder cheer broke in the arena and looking to the screen you saw the south korean band announced and when it disappears it took a few seconds for the screams to stop, the announcers opened the envelope, two seconds of silence in the speakers and then...“BTS!” You jump clapping finding strength out of nowhere and with a smile you saw the band walk in front of your eyes with wide eyes, open mouth and smiles, a single hand sticking out for you and knowing who it was you brush his hand with yours. 

Then you turn back and with a bodyguard in front and another in your heels, you walk into the main stage of the arena. 

Everything was blurry, you followed the guard into the hallway and crouched to get in the elevator, holding the mic and letting your head go over the choreography. And when the voice in your in ear says “one”you feel the lift move and stand.You felt like you were going to faint, but still make your moves as smooth as possibly, it felt like forever but when you give the final move and look at the camera you give the most convincing smile ever. Wait for the count to end and the light to ade out to let your body fall to the ground. But the light did not fade, and the camera was still on you. 

The host appeared to your side to announce that your music had already broken a record and that you had won another 2 awards. You accept the award and let the host hug you and unintentionally your body stumbles, your eyes give a turn and feel almost lost conscious.“It's okay” you said to the man and pulled out with a smile, looking to the worried crowd,”It's okay” you repeat in the mic ” I very excited, to be here and to win this awards, thank you to everybody that make this possible, my fans, my family, my team, everybody that listen my music and the art i make, thank you so much, i love you” You said, making well rehearsed words leave your mouth, you leave following the lady with the awards, numb. 

The act seemed innocent and so quickly and random that nobody should have noted, but it set something, pieces clicking in place, for you felt illicit, scandalous, it ignited something that you have never let your body cave in, lust. A sin so impure that only thinking about it makes you flustered, but it only took a couple of glances, some brushes of skin and a hug for you to continue the seduction game he started. And you wanted him to win, to ditch all the circus and let him take you to the hotel, seeing him all in black contrasting with his soft creamy skin, a fallen angel.  

Wanting to feel something, did you deserve the awards? Your music had moved so much from your original goal that  you barely felt it was good. So you didn't feel proud, and you did not feel happy, or sad, or angry. You felt hungry, and tired.

 How dare he be so cool? With the glinting earrings and the necklaces and the deep voice and side smile, a dream, you never thought he was just your type. Was it possible for you to have him? A quick internet research let you know his name, his position on the group and his age, he was a little over five years older than you, younger than your “exes” but so much different, he felt real, a real man, but at the same time he was surreal, to perfect,  to gorgeous. And you wanted to know all about him.

You sit alone in the buffet of your hotel, with other people who also went to the awards, munching on a chicken salad with some delicious sauce and bread sticks and a glass of orange juice. Your orange juice, of course, was spiked with alcohol by your manager, a way to make you last giggly and awake for the rest of the night. Feeling already full with your second plate and with already a certain amount of alcohol in your system, you felt better, enough to keep looking at the table in front of you. Where 7 boy sit holding a camera laughing at one of them knocking the glass with the camera gummy smile boy who had, just like you, been looking at you smile with you and you hold the big stack of tissues at him, he walk to you and brushing fingers he take it from your hands “thanks” he said with a deep voice, one that you had already heard in his music videos but never compared to the real thing.

It took you 30 minutes to shower, dry your hair, put light makeup and a flowy black dress, that fall above your knees, do a quick google research of what to expect at losing your virginity and chugging the mini bottle of wine of your mini fridge, cleaning all of the clothes on the bed and quickly fix it. And when you thought that he wouldn't come a knock was heard. You look for the last time in the mirror and open the door.

 And he was there, his hair now completely straight  and soft looking and his face was bare, no necklace and simple cotton shirt and black cargo pants. Like he couldn't be more gorgeous.  Oh wait, he could, looking at you with the damn smile. “Hi” you said, already losing the game “Hi”, deep voice and cute accent, you can't help but giggle, boozing  alcohol in your veins.

“Please, please come in” You open the door all the way “ I´m y/n, by the way” you said and he looks at you, “I know, I´m Yoongi” he says laughing “I know” you respondHe lifted an eyebrow “you do?” he said with a smug smile, “of course i know, i'm not that  dump to hook up with a guy i don't even know the name of” you widen your eyes and blame the alcohol by your blunt remark, but feel relieved when he laughs. He let you lead the way to the living room and when he sits on the couch he notices the object on the coffee table, an unopened copy of BTS 'latest album you had.

They said goodbye and you broke contact, gulping the last of your orange juice and immediately got replaced, you looked back at your manager and publicist, talking to their manager, using the translator that look flustered, and you knew why, after yourself had talked with your manager about your request, voice confident but cheeks flushed, your manager didn't even had to approach BTS manager before he was already on his way, at that you felt a weird feeling, a territorial frown in your eyes, but you couldn't blame him. Every celebrity you have met has done this.  A simple deal, a way for celebrities to keep their affairs as private and publicly clean, both sides agreed to keep it quiet and not slip ups. When they finally look at you, turn again to him, his manager walking to him, and slipping a black plastic card. A key to the room to one of the suites. Your suite.

“I thought you could signed for me” you explained with a shy tone “I found it on the airport bookstore and since i kinda collect music album i thought it was a nice addition” 

He grabbed it “can i open it?”  he said with the cute accent, you nod excited and he carefully start to unwrap you sit by his side to get a better look, when he finished it, he looks at you

 “it has a photocard” he explains and you giggle again at the way he pronounce the last word, feeling the warm feeling in your stomach and he send your favorite smile at you.He opens the book and stop at the page with the card stuck to it “It's random so is a surprise, go, turn it around” he gesture to the book, you grab it and turn it around,

 “Oww” you let out a disappointed sound when you look at the man that clearly wasn't your Min Yoongi, he laughs and you pout “what can i do if i want one of you?” you ask with a distressed look. He dares to look flustered and he reach to his neck and the his hair, you wanted yours in its place, you licked your lips and look at lis face, “You could buy lots of album until mine come out” hmmm

“That's a good idea” his stare became intense and his eyes darken, his tongue brushed his bottom lip and someone must move forward because your lips replaced his tongue was now kissing his lips. 

Your fingers grab his shirt while his palms was cupping your cheeks, thumb brushing against it, the darkest desires in your mind, the need to be touch to be taken care of,taking his hand in yours you put it on your thigh, where your dress had lift and he complied to your silent request, pushing the fabric up and caressing your skin, but not where you need it him.

 You lean in the couch bringing him with you, but he pull from the kiss, leaving you gasping, “are you sure?” he ask, with his soft, dark eyes, lips swollen and flushed cheeks, you nod, but he shakes his head “are you sure?” he repeats, you think for a second looking at your giddy, boozy brain, “yes, i'm sure” you said with the most confident voice you could muster, he kiss you again and then its your turn to pull away from the kiss ”wait, wait, i,  i haven't, i never have i ever before, i mean, i never had done this before” you confess and he looks at you still panting, he nods, and ask again “are you sure?” and you are.

He didn't let you lay in the couch.

He let you run your fingers through his torso and take his shirt off.

You let him pull down the strips of your dress.

He let you know how much he desires you.

You let him touch for the first time against the wall, making you see stars and blow away in a climax.

He takes to the bed, carrying like you were a leaf.

You let him stole sweet moans out of your mouth

He takes it slowly, touching skin like you were fine china.

You feel like a confident woman when you whisper “you are so gorgeous, I can say anything to your face.”

He lets a deep chuckle and gives a deep thrust making you scream of pleasure.

A mix of sloppy kisses, discreet love bites, nails against skin and pasional hip thrust between the sheets you let yourself think for a second that is not a one time thing, that euphoric feeling you were experimenting and that it was the most happy you had been in years was going to finish the moment he finish panting against your neck.

You tried to not look disappointed when he stood up and walked to the bathroom, closing your eyes, letting yourself feel the remnants of your climax.

He came back a few minutes later, cleaning between your legs and leaving a soft kiss in your thigh before slipping your underwear in its place, holding you in his arms.

You cried for the first time in front of a person. 

He tells you that he knew you were hungry, he had felt it before. Not by his own choice.

You tell him about the empty feeling in your stage while on stage.

He kisses your face while rubbing circles in your back.

  When the morning sun came up you watched his sleeping figure, his back up and belly down, face facing you and his arm around you.

You mindlessly start writing invisible letters, your name. Wishing he could be more than a stranger.

He lets you a note. His number. Breakfast. And a single pink flower and a book from the souvenir store “ The meaning of flowers”

Azalea

 The azalea is the flower that ushers in springtime in the southern United States. That’s one reason it’s so closely associated with beauty and rebirth. 

These blooms are often given as a symbolic message to, “Take care of yourself,” which is an important sentiment to extend to the bereaved.

Little-Known fact:

 Azaleas are celebrated in festivals throughout the world, especially the U.S. and Asia. In Chinese culture, the azalea is known as the “thinking of home bush” and was immortalized in the poetry of a famous poet during the Tang dynasty.

HIIIIIIIIII

SO 

I FINISH THIS CHAPTER

It took years, but my mental health has been bad lately and also was hard to write the first meeting, if it look to rushed, dont worry its kinda the point, they are not in love but definetly know that they felt something. But they dont know each other,  i like to think of them as soulmates. 

We see how she was physically and mentaly hitting rock bottom and her team is not as innocent as it look.

If i was vague about everything, when the managers were talking, they were basically negociating the one night stand, that way the public wouldnt found out. A normal ocurrence in this AU.

Everything you feel courius about, please let me know.

Thank you so much for reading, i love you

[btssmutficslovingfan01]

When in Rome: TA Edition

This is a sequel to When in Rome: Frat Edition.

Summary: You’re the ambassador of the celibacy club, forced to go to a Roman-themed frat party to find your club members before they lose their purity. Among the faces you see at the party is your biggest enemy, Namjoon Kim, who also happens to be a TA so you have to meet up with him for dreaded tutoring sessions. What happens when you run into him at that same party on the night you’re supposed to be hosting a club meeting? You’re in luck, today he’s feeling slightly more submissive than usual...

Words: 4.4k

Pairing: Namjoon x Reader

Genre: Smut, pwp, enemies-to-lovers (low-key)

Warnings: Masturbation (m & f), voyeurism, riding, graphic descriptions of straight sex, dom/sub dynamics, sub Joon, dom reader, choking

You stare at your reflection in the mirror in the back of the room. It doesn’t look like anyone will be attending your meeting today. It’s half past 7 and the sun is already setting. You were supposed to meet your three other club members 20 minutes ago, what was taking them so long? Your phone chimes with a text all of a sudden, your attention focused on the single text it reads: 

Suddenly, you’re determined to go to that party and find those girls who decided to take back their vow of innocence. You knew you should’ve forced them to wear the chastity belts.

The reason why you’re so keen on finding them before it’s too late? You experienced the loss of losing your first partner. Your boyfriend, who was the leader of a gang ended up dying in a motorcycle crash, he was your first love and your first sexual partner.

After he passed, you felt dirty. You kept craving sex, every day, every second, every hour. Even when you were eating dinner with your family, that’s all you could think of. Maybe even making eye contact with a stranger. Sex. You needed it, your body was yearning for it.

Finally, you gave in. You decided to select a random as your second, and you felt relief from something being inside of you. The numerous trips to the club ended with you in a hotel room with a man who could do the job. Slowly, you had become numb. The sex was starting to feel boring, you were craving an emotional connection. So, you decided to stop for a bit.

That’s when you met Hyerin. She was handing out flyers and stopped you while you were passing by. She told you to come to the Celibacy club orientation and you felt strange. You never once thought of shutting your legs completely, you thought you were ruined after sleeping around so much. She also revealed she wasn’t a Virgin, and she had the same problem in high school. She decided to take a vow of no more sex before marriage and she joined the club two years ago. You missed her guidance. She was like a sister to you and you couldn’t think of what she would say about your leadership. 

You regretted taking it so lightly at first, since you couldn’t even keep three recruits in line. Luckily, the party was close by, so you could walk to the house.

You liked the environment, surprisingly. Even if it brought back memories of the club, you felt like you were facing your fears again. You didn’t avoid parties on purpose, you just felt like you always had something better to do.

“Isn’t this a pleasant surprise?” That voice. You knew that voice anywhere. It was Namjoon. Blech.

“Namjoon? What are you doing here?” You fold your arms as he reaches past you. You close your eyes, slightly uncomfortable from his close proximity.

“I’m grabbing a snack. You’re standing in front of the snack table, if you want drugs you should head over to table two in the back. Ricardo’s selling some good stuff over there.” You can’t believe Namjoon is actually letting people do illegal stuff at this party.

“I don’t want drugs. I’m looking for three girls, all freshmen. They’re actually triplets, Misa, Lisa, and Keisha. Do you know where they might be?” The tall blond shakes his head, popping a pistachio into his mouth.

“Sorry, I have no clue. Although, I might have seen Lisa around. Is she the brunette with that silver streak in her hair?” He describes the girl perfectly. The girls have that one trait which is prominent, even if they dye their hair different colors. Lisa has a natural hair color, different from her sisters since they dyed their hair and she didn’t. Keisha and Misa were easy to pick out because they had silver streaks in their hair too, and Keisha dyed hers blue while Misa dyed hers blond. They were all born with natural brown hair, you remember it from their introductions on the first day after they joined the club. You didn’t realize you’d miss them this much.

“Yes, it’s a trait that runs in her family! You have to come with me, show me where you saw her last.” You pull Namjoon along with you, despite hating his guts. He was a player and for some reason these stupid girls think of him as a heartthrob. Those dimples are attractive, you have to admit, but that doesn’t mean you should crawl into bed with them! You respect your body.

“Wait, I don’t want to find a freshman. I wanna get laid with one of those hot senior girls.” You glare daggers at the boy as he peers down at you. You were a couple inches shorter than him, taller than the average height as well. At least he couldn’t call you short. Being tall did have one downside though: you were flat chested.

“Was it in this hallway? Where the fuck are the stairs?! Ughhh what if we’re too late? I don’t want to have any blood on my hands. She’s gonna regret this…” You look around the room, eyeing every girl carefully before Namjoon turns you around. “What?!” You snap at him, as he puts a hand on your cheek. You didn’t know why but it calmed you down. 

“Take a chill pill, relax. If they’re with one of my boys, they’re safe. Why are you so worked up about them anyways?” You play with the strings of your hoodie as Namjoon stares at you intently. A man’s gaze has never made you feel butterflies. So why were you suddenly all light and floaty standing next to him?

“I’m the leader of the celibacy club. If I don’t protect them from losing their virginity, who else will? They made a vow when they joined but it seems that they’ve decided to do a full 180 and come here of all places for their first time,” You sound like you’re talking about one person when in fact you were talking about three. Namjoon understands your worry. He does the same with his students since he’s a tutor. “So why are you not dressed up like the others?” You ask out of courtesy, not because you’re actually curious.

“I just came from practice. I’m actually part of Yoongi Min’s band, so I have practice outside of office hours.” You wondered how he still managed to take time out of his day to tutor you. If this had been any other situation, you might have developed a crush on him. Now, you aren’t so sure about your feelings since your heart is in your stomach from worrying about the girls.

“It’s good to know that there’s someone here like me,” You share a brief 3 seconds staring at each other before you spot Misa behind the kitchen island. “Misa! Where are your sisters?” Namjoon follows closely behind you as you turn to the triplet with worry.

“They’re getting laid. I just finished a round of beer pong with this guy. Don’t worry about me, I’m not giving my virginity to some sweaty oaf that thinks he can get girls by flashing a smile at them.” You suddenly realize that she’s talking about Namjoon who is grinning widely at her from behind you. You punch him in the gut, leaving him hunched over as you say goodbye to your club member.

“You’re disgusting. Come, you’re gonna help me find the other girls.”

“No,” You whip your head around, seriously pissed at how he’s suddenly acting like this. Why do men always act the opposite of what you want them to act like? (It’s called free will duh) You always have to take it a step further and spell things out for them. Namjoon, however, is a fellow intellectual. He must understand when you tell him “Go,” and “stop.” Why was he suddenly protesting? What reason could he possibly have to—“Why are you trying to stop them from doing something they want to do? It’s not like they’re doing this because they’re pressured to. You said you’re the leader of the celibacy club, right?” He takes a step forward, taking your hand in his before leading you to the basement. You were surprised a house like this actually has a basement, and luckily no one else was here to interrupt you as you spoke. The party was loud and the music was booming loud enough for you to hear it even down in the dark.

He switches on a single naked bulb before plopping down on a vintage brown couch, patting the spot next to him. You sit down, silent as he continues lecturing. “A leader should guide, not rule. You were supposed to guide those girls to make the right decisions for themselves. Even if it seems like the wrong one, in the end I’m sure you taught them well.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You ask, knowing exactly what the answer to your dumb question was. 

“You taught them the benefits of celibacy. I’m sure they took that information, processed it, and decided to proceed with doing what any teenage girl would do. I’m not saying all teens sleep around, but some people are curious. At this age, you can’t stop them from making their own decisions. Maybe this is a good thing, they’ll learn from their mistakes and grow. It’s a human thing.” You purse your lips to keep the tears from falling.

“I know. You’re right, you’re right. I think I should just leave now.”

“Wait! You should stay, please. Just stay with me and drink some Pepsi.” You take the cold drink from his hand as he shuts the mini-fridge door and switches on the t.v.

“I suppose I can stay longer. I finished my homework and I was supposed to have a club meeting but I guess that’s not happening now so…” You notice how Namjoon’s Adams’ Apple bobs up and down as he drinks the dark liquid in one go. He notices you staring, asking you what’s wrong as you quickly pull your eyes away from him, staring at the floor as you sip your drink lightly.

“What’s your position?” 

“Pardon?” 

“Are you a dom or sub?” You didn’t expect your conversation to take this turn but after conversing with all the boys in your high school you knew they would start talking about something dirty the moment they started a conversation with you at some point. This wasn’t dirty, though. It seemed that your tutor/TA actually wanted to know your stance.

“I don’t know. I guess I’ve always just laid down and let the guy do all the work. No foreplay, no kinky stuff, just me, the guy, and a bed.” Namjoon clicks his tongue in disapproval.

“Aw really? That’s too bad. I would’ve taken you as some sort of sex freak but I guess the boys were wrong about that…” Your heart drops.

“What boys?!” It couldn’t have been anyone else, you knew the men from the club seemed too familiar. Had you been sleeping with frat members since you were in high school?

“I’m just messing with you, no one said anything about you but if they did, I would’ve won the bet.” You sigh in relief, feeling more at ease around your TA now. Before, you just thought he was a snobby jerk who sweet-talks women into bed with him.

“Don’t joke around like that again. Plus, you haven’t told me what your position is yet, either. So what are you? Dom or sub?” He scratches the back of his neck.

“Geez, this is embarrassing. Okay, so I like taking charge but I also like being controlled. I guess you can call me a switch?” Now you were interested. You wouldn’t take Namjoon as the type of guy that let a woman do all the work in bed. Of course, there was something exhilarating about that, too. 

You were curious as to how the dom/sub dynamics would work if you were in bed with him. For a moment, you actually imagine yourself in a sensual situation with him. His big hands sliding down your back as your hips snap against his, you riding him as he squeezes your thigh, or fails to since you handcuffed him to the headboard so he can’t move from that one spot as you suck his skin on various parts of his body, hickies bright red and fresh as you—“Y/N? Do you like taking control?” 

Yes.

“Um, I don’t know? Yes?” You can feel the sweat beading across your forehead. You’re suddenly very hot, despite it being cooler down in the basement. 

“You’re sweating, why don’t you take off your shirt?”

“What?!” You exclaim as he yawns and rubs his neck.

“I said you should take off your sweatshirt.” You smile anxiously at him before pulling your sweatshirt above your head. You were currently feeling very sensitive, and you were sure that if he touched you, you would pounce on him like a lioness. 

You’re sure he can smell your arousal, as he slides an arm behind your shoulder as you lean back on the couch while he changes the channel. You aren’t paying much attention to the t.v before he switches the channel enough times to the point that you’ve reached the adult channels. 

If you weren’t blushing before, you certainly were now. A video of a woman getting on her knees to suck off a man with a ridiculously gigantic cock begins to play, the moist sound of her lips wrapping around his cock resonating around the room as it plays on the speakers.

“What the hell, Namjoon?! Have you no shame?” He laughs as you throw a pillow at him. 

“Wait, Wait, this is my favorite kind of porn, Wait for it,” You turn back to the screen reluctantly as the video fades to another one, this time the same woman is dressed in lingerie from head to toe, as the man is fully naked.

You watch as the blond wrings her hands around his neck, choking the man as he struggles to breathe but he still maintains that expression of obvious arousal. How was he actually into that? You weren’t into pain play and you knew Namjoon couldn’t possibly like being choked out either. “I love being choked. I’m into that kinky shit, handcuffs, blindfolds, you tell me.” 

You didn’t expect those words to come out of his mouth. At least now, you know there is such a world like that. One where women actually possess power over men. 

Your eyes wander down to Namjoon’s pants as he actually starts palming himself, one hand still behind your shoulder as you lean forward on the couch.

“What are you doing?” You finally break the awkward silence as the moans of the man on the screen continue, fogging your mind up with possibilities as the porno continues to play.

“Haven’t you masturbated before? This is the same thing. I’m just trying to get some relief,” At least he was honest.

You watch the porn in silence, with the exception of the moans on screen, and the ridiculous acting displayed by the porn stars. Why do they even bother trying to act? They should just have sex and that’s it.

You eventually find yourself mirroring Namjoon, trailing a finger up and down your jeans before Namjoon comes right out and says it: “You can take off your clothes if you want. I won’t touch you,” You start kicking off your jeans. “You can watch me too...if you want.” You don’t know where this sudden shyness from your TA was coming from. Normally he’s bossy, demanding, and very outgoing. Now, he was suddenly shy? You’re sure this has to do with the dom/sub thing he was speaking of earlier.

Your attention is half on the screen, and half on Namjoon as he pulls his dripping cock out of his boxers, languidly stroking the erection despite having you right in front of him. He wasn’t going to take advantage of you, he decided in his mind. He wanted to see how this played out, if this voyeuristic showcase would lead to something else.

You slip your fingers into your panties, letting out a cross between a moan and a whimper. You are so lost in your own pleasure that you fail to notice your yummy TA undressing you with his dark and mysterious eyes, his lips curling into a small smirk as he watches you toy with your pussy.

“What am I doing here? This is so wrong but it feels so good-ah.” You stare down with a dry mouth as your breath escapes you. You did not just cum. From watching an awful porno. Well, it wasn’t awful but you didn’t want to acknowledge it as a work of art, either. The actress gave you an idea of how to properly dominate a man. You’d never been one for loads of sex but you were willing to indulge in the pleasure for one night only since your club members were probably losing their virginity as you stay seated on the couch of a frat boy that you were pretty sure had some sort of STD.  

“You came already? Awww, dammit, I was so close to finishing.” Namjoon’s voice snaps you back to reality just so you can act on your impulse again.

“Uh-oh, looks like these are ruined. I’ll have to toss them aside. You don’t mind, do ya Joon?” Namjoon’s eyebrow twitches as he tries to figure out what your aim is. He knew you were innocent but it seems he has a case of ‘good girl gone bad’ right in front of him. As you turn your attention back to the t.v, every once in a while stroking your very wet labia, Namjoon’s cock seems to grow a little longer. 

“Okay, I can’t take it anymore. Please let me fuck you!” You’re surprised by how he snapped so quickly. Here you were thinking he didn’t want you anymore. How silly of you.

“Uh-uh. Let’s play a game first. You said you were into dom/sub dynamics, right? So how about you let me dominate you tonight and we can see where it goes from there?” Namjoon’s gaze softens as he decreases the volume, and you’re certainly sure that he can hear your racing heart by now as he manually switches off the television. He then undoes his pants and lets his boxers fall to the floor before turning his attention back to you.

“Okay, I’ll bite. What do you want me to do first?”

“On the floor, baby boy. I’m gonna ride you.” He groans as you slip him inside your throbbing hole, and you let out a sigh of pleasure before bouncing yourself up and down on his cock. His dick felt even better inside of you, since your walls took him in so well. He couldn’t believe you were actually doing this to him, you who supposedly hated him.

“What happened to hating me?” You bite your lip as he places a hand on your bare ass, your panties are lying on the floor next to you as you continue using Namjoon like a grade-A dildo.

“Who says you need to like someone to fuck them? You know what they say about angry sex, it’s supposed release tension. Fuck your problems away, fuck it all.” You both moan in sync as his cock twitches erratically and right before he cums, you pop off with a squelching sound and you quickly get to work with your hands, his cum splattering all over his belly and your fingers. 

He pulls you down for a quick kiss before you instruct him on what to do next.

“Next, I’m gonna put that mouth of yours to good use. Suck my clit, and do it as thoroughly as possible.” He quickly takes to your pussy, cupping your heat before giving small kitten licks to your labia. You were against the couch while he was hunched between your legs, eating you out like a good sub.

“That feels good. Don’t be shy, fuck me like you mean it, smartass,” He winks before pushing his tongue deeper, deep enough for you to feel it rub up against your cervix. Somehow, his tongue felt way better than his cock. “Yes, nnnngg, I’m cumming.” You feel a familiar knot in your core as Joon tongue-fucks you, saliva dripping down your inner thigh but you don’t care. You just feel too good to care.

So what if you were the leader of the celibacy club? It wasn’t like you had sex often. You were also losing your footing. You had become devoid emotion because of how much you were craving sex. Now, splayed out on your back, your TA delicately licking your folds, you felt relieved.

Your cum dribbles down his cheeks, and sweat beads are glistening on his forehead as he looks up to you, as if asking “did I do enough?” As you dab his head with a tissue.

You decide that wasn’t enough, you needed to have him inside you once more. 

“You said you liked being choked, right?” Namjoon nods, biting down on his lips hard enough to make them bleed as you wrap your hands around him and you sink back down on his dick. Now he was the one being choked on the ground while you were hunched over him, kissing his smooth chest and tracing his nipples gently with your nose. He lets out the most delicious moan you’ve heard all night, before whispering hoarsely, “Fuck me harder, mistress.”

You pounce on him, your greedy pussy lips salaciously devouring his erection as he hardens inside you once again. Even Joon was surprised by his own dick. He had never been so quick to bounce back but you were an enigma. You lighted a fire inside of him that he didn’t even know existed.

You lean forward, your breasts warm pressed up against his chest as you continue riding his cock like your life depended on it. You grow tired, panting heavily as Namjoon takes things into his own hands, gripping your ass tightly as your hands snaked down from his neck to his hair. You were curling your fingers into his hair so intimately like you owned him. He’s not your man. Which makes things a hell of a lot more sexy. 

His bleeding lip was dry, as you leaned in to steal a kiss from him, but he simply turned his head, your soft lips making contact with his left cheek instead.

“You don’t wanna get involved with me. I’m a bad guy, remember?” You respond by dragging your legs forward, sitting back as Namjoon stares back at you with darkened eyes, devoid of any emotion. He looks different compared to the playful preppy student you met earlier. You found yourself still crawling back to him, wanting to know more. You’re reaching...reaching...reaching. 

“Lighten up. Your cock is literally inside of me, Joon.” He growls in response, stimulating a carnal instinct within you to fuck. You’ve never felt it before, never felt so good on a cock quite like this one. What’s different about him? 

“Fuck, you take my dick so well. Why didn’t we do this sooner?” He grunts, your sexes squelching against each other as he holds you in place as he fucks his dick up into you. 

“Shit, Namjoon I’m cumming.” He grips your fingers with his big, warm hands. As your fingers intertwine, he kisses your neck. You lean into him, groaning as he continues bucking his hips up. You were truly fucking on the floor like a couple of horny animals.

It feels so good, I can’t help it. You thought. Your pussy squeezes his dick for dear life as he thrusts up into you. You feel the pinch, as your walls continue clamping down on him as he moves inconceivably slow. He slows down only because of your clenching, you know since he does his best in moving as quickly as your walls would allow, tossing you around like his own personal fuck doll. “Baby, cum with me.” You let out a mewl as he groans simultaneously, filling up your hole with his juices. After hours of fucking, you were both content with the end result.

He gives you one last docile kiss before we both get dressed. You throw your clothes back on, feeling fuzzy and sated as Namjoon stares shamelessly at your ass.

“I enjoyed it.” He comments as a wave of emotions hits you. You had forgotten about how much I hated him and his stupid smartass remarks when you couldn’t understand basic calculus. You were confused, the only thing you could do was pray something like this wouldn’t happen again and if it did you wouldn’t mind.

“Do you think you know my position now?” You ask, not really expecting much aftercare since you weren’t in a relationship with him.

“You're a dom. And I am your sub. Maybe, if you think of me differently now, we could go out for a midnight snack at the nearest fast food place?” You liked the way that sounded. Although towards the end Namjoon overpowered you since you were too hazy to think while impaled on his cock, he still was captivated and enraptured by you. You were like a math equation to him, after all he just did you. 

He also couldn’t deny the unrelenting sexual tension between the two of you whenever you hurled insults at him or when he said something about your academic abilities in a goading manner. He loved seeing how huffy you got whenever he said something about your club and how “interesting” it sounded when he heard you took over as the ambassador.

You didn’t know how he felt either, the underlying affection discarded as you focused on your anger for the man. However, you would rather die than admitting you had a tiny crush on him. 

“Sounds good, um...are we good here? Like all jokes aside you know I don’t actually hate you, right?” He nods, rubbing his neck as you wipe your sweaty palms on your clothes.

“I know. And you do know I have a big fat crush on you, right?” You feel heat rushing to your cheeks at that, your body significantly hotter than it was a couple minutes ago.

“No, actually, I didn’t know that.” You had a hunch he did.

“Wow, did it get hot in here or is it just me? Let’s go.” He pulls you towards the party upstairs, claiming you as his for the night as you push past the crowd of drunk teenagers.

[xcactusarto]

Heaven Help Me

an Aoyama Yuga x Iida Tenya university au fic

Ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/33615358

Summary:

What would happen if you found out the person that ordered art prints from you is the guy you’ve been interested in and lives 2 dorms away from you?

Poor Aoyama is denying his feelings from all the times boys broke his little heart, but this guy seems different and became even more special after Aoyama finds out this dude is a big fan of his art! Will he deliver the art prints himself or just leave the package at his door?

Part 1 / ?

Chapter 2 -

Aoyama was anxious to spill the tea on what had just happened to Bakugou once he could go back to his dorm. Even if he was excited to spill the beans, his stomach was not in good shape. He knew this feeling all too well.

He wanted it gone.

Aoyama arrived 5 minutes late after having to change routes and hiding between the bushes next to the art building to throw up dramatically. Thankfully his teacher was late so he could calm down and sit down. Aoyama felt seasick despite only having butterflies. Throw up could happen or the shits. ‘Not in this outfit’ Aoyama thought as he gripped his phone. The class only lasts 30 mins. Since his teacher was late probably less. Maybe he could text Bakugou about how sick he felt maybe they could walk together to the dorms.

.

.

.

Baku dear! My stomach is being very bitchy ~(>_<~) could you pick me up???

.

.

.

.

5 mins passed and Bakugou didn’t answer. Nor did the teacher show up yet. Aoyama looked around and his classmates looked confused as well. Aoyama looks a little to his right and whispers to his classmate.

“Dear, uh do you know if we had class today?”, his classmate looked at him and whispered back.

“Gurlie I’m not gonna lie, this is the first time in the semester I have come to class”, The classmate giggled and said,” Oh, but dude your outfit is hella cute”. Aoyama smiles at his classmate. A girl with a pink afro, a pink headband that made the knotted ends look like horns on her head, and hazel eyes.

“Oh thank you! But I gotta say you look absolutely dashing! Love the colors!”, Aoyama looked at his classmate up and down scanning her outfit. A blue tie-dye crop top with purple spots that went down to her chest. A black bralette under and some pastel yellow sweatpants that gave Aoyama the idea that she could be a dancer. White sneakers with colorful shoelaces. “What’s your name dear?”, Aoyama asked smiling. A small link formed and it was the start of a very nice and stylish friendship.

“Mina Ashido! And you?”, Mina said excitedly as she almost jumped from her seat. She could see this dude could be a great way to pass the class without having to show up. “Yuga Aoyama. Pleased to meet you.” Aoyama and Mina chatted as they waited for their teacher to show up. Slowly the people around them would get up and leave or just chat with each other. The silence of the room cleared up as Mina and Aoyama laughed and talked about their passion for fashion and their hobbies. Aoyama’s perception of Mina was right, she was a Dance major. She was currently doing ballet because she didn’t want her parents to know she was an underground street dancer. On the other hand, Mina learned Aoyama was a digital artist and even got to see some of his pieces. Both were very passionate and frankly, they could be each other’s moral support.

“Hey how about we exchange numbers?”, Mina said and quickly looked around. They were the only ones in class. The classroom was empty and the clock ticking at the front of the class. The class had just ended. Maybe coming to class wasn’t so bad since Aoyama was here. They both looked at each other and laughed. Aoyama’s butterflies were gone and Mina took away his anxiety of shitting himself.

“Yeah that would be wonderful”, Aoyama and Mina then tapped their phone and so they could now talk to each other without having to be in class. Maybe even hang out sometime. As they walked to the door and parted ways Aoyama could notice Bakugou never replied, but his bitch ass left Aoyama on seen. Aoyama was used to it and knew Bakugou would come. Bakugou often forgot to reply , but would do stuff Aoyama texted him to do or asked.

Aoyama waited outside the building for a while. He then sat down and looked at his phone. Scrolled down on his Twitter and Instagram timeline for some time. Aoyama then let out a sigh and got up. He then plugged in his earphones and as he was about to walk away his dorm neighbor called out to him. “Aoyama-kun! Wait up”, A slightly freckled buff guy with green fluffy curly hair called out to him. He wasn’t very stylish , but was always kind to Aoyama. Even though at one point our little Aoyama stalked him because he wanted to be friends with him. I mean he needed a reference for his styling assignment and he was perfect for the outfit. Aoyama stood there and waited for him to catch up to him. “Did class just finish for you too?”, The green-haired hunk asked Aoyama. Aoyama looked at him and explained his situation of waiting for Bakugou.

“Ah, Kacchan didn’t come to pick you up? I can walk you then since we are going to the same dorms!”, his dorm neighbor was always a lifesaver. “Denki is probably at our dorm so I can text him if he can check if Kacchan is there”.

“Please Midori! I’m worried he is oversleeping again. Which I doubt it...He’s probably working out”, Aoyama said as he locked arms with his neighbor. Midoriya Izuku or as Bakugou called him, ‘Deku’, shared a room with Denki Kaminari. Both Midoriya and Denki were his dorm neighbors and often came to watch movies or just help Aoyama with styling assignments. Midoriya was known by the fashion majors as the guy that wore weird shirts. Today he was wearing a pastel blue pullover that had ‘tiny weenie baby’ on it. Aoyama wanted to chuckle , but decided to hold it in. Midoriya’s boyfriend could probably say that was true. They walked to the dorms and as soon as Aoyama got close to the door he slammed it open.

“BITCH YOU HAD ME WAITING FOR 20 MINS OUTSIDE!”, Aoyama said hand still on the door. Midoriya looking over Aoyama’s shoulder. They had caught Bakugou at a...uh special moment.

“CAN’T YOU KNOCK?!”, Bakugou shouted back as he was making out with a purple-haired dude that looked exhausted. Bakugou was still in pajamas while the other was dressed like an e-boy that had just come out of hot topic after his mother had given him an allowance of $10 to spend on my chemical romance merch. That emo boy was Shinso Hitoshi, Bakugou’s boyfriend, and Aoyama’s ex-boyfriend which actually ended well with no heartbreak. I mean they lasted 1 week. Midoriya sneakily walking away then bumped into Denki who was joined by his dark-haired friend. Aoyama looked behind him and immediately then pulls Midoriya as to show proof in an Ace Attorney game.

“I can’t believe poor little Midori had to take time out of his day to walk me back!” Aoyama said as he hugged Midoriya with puppy eyes.

“W-Well uh technically I was walking back so might as well accompany him, right?” Midoriya nervously smiled as Denki walked into the room and held in the laughter he had from seeing Bakugou slightly flustered from being caught getting it on with Shinso. Bakugou then of course starts arguing with Deku as if Deku was the one at fault. Oh well, Aoyama needed to spill the beans on the guy he saw and interacted with so he gathered Denki, Shinso, and Denki’s friend who was just watching the chaos happening in a room full of gays. Except for Denki he had a girlfriend. I mean he isn’t straight, but bisexual so yeah a gay too. Aoyama shoved them to the other side of the room onto his bottom bunk. They all proceeded to sit down and let Aoyama sit cross-legged in the middle while he held a pillow.

“Oh my gosh, guys please help me snap out of these feelings I’m having! I’M GONNA DIE!”, Aoyama said as he swung his arms around dramatically.

“Is he gonna scooter ankle or is he being dramatic?” Denki’s friend leaned over and whispered in Denki’s ear.

“No Sero, he is just being dramatic about something .”, Shinso said as they looked at Aoyama giving them puppy eyes. Sero Hanta, Denki’s friend who was wrapped up in this situation. Sero is a black-haired dude with a nice wide smile. He often just wore pullovers and looked like those dudes that sits right in front of you in computer class and just watching memes or editing Shrek on Ronal McDonald’s body. Those dudes are pretty chill once you start talking to them.

“Just let him spill the tea guys. I wanna know what made him so anxious”, Denki said as he nudged both of the boys to listen.

“So I was walking to class alright?? And then and then I bumped into this guy while I was checking the time on my phone! And then bam this dude was holding me so sweetly and he was so strong might I add!!”, Aoyama said excitedly as he gripped the pillow close to his chest. The boys on the other hand looked at him. Maybe he’s being dramatic, Denki thought. The room of course was still noisy while Aoyama spilled his feelings on the hunk of a man that literally held him as if it was a shojo manga.

“And then he even HELD MY HAND!! MY PRECIOS HAND TO HAND ME MY PHONE!! He also told me to be careful and walked away as if nothing happened!!”, Aoyama sighs after this and just lets his body lay on the boys legs as he dramatically puts his left arm over his face.

“Well, that was something. How did he look like wey?”, Sero asked as he held Aoyama’s arm away from his face. Denki and Shinso nodded. Aoyama then puts a finger on his lips and thinks for a little. “Mind if I sketch him out?” Aoyama says as he signals Shinso to pass him his sketchbook.

After a few minutes, he then shows the boys as he had decided to sit between Denki and Sero. “He looked like this!! He had some weird eyebrows that looked like the Nike symbols!”, Aoyama pointed at the drawing. The boys felt like they had seen him before. They just couldn’t find this dude’s name in the glossary of their minds.

“Isn’t that Iida-kun?”

[mysageukinbio]

JHB '81 Episode 25 as a series of incoherent Discord messages

Episode 25

[7:46 PM]Narration: Jang Suk Won's been arrested by Inhyeon for ignoring her and playingn the geomungo

[7:46 PM]Everyone is watching to see what will happen

[7:46 PM]Lady OH: Jang Suk Won is here at the Queen's Palace

[7:47 PM]Inhyeon: Bring out the torture devices!

[7:47 PM]Jangryeol and Sukjong hear

[7:47 PM]The torture devices are out

[7:47 PM]Inhyeon: Tie up the criminal!

[7:48 PM]Nobody dares to do so

[7:48 PM]Sukjong hears

[7:48 PM]He can't stand this, he's going to the Queen's Palace

[7:48 PM]"The Queen's going to lose her dignity, something will happen to Jang Suk Won!"

[7:49 PM]Jangryeol stops Sukjong

[7:49 PM]"I knew you'd do this, so here I am. Don't get involved so hastily"

[7:49 PM]"What are you going to do when you get there? Whose side are you going to take?"

[7:50 PM]"You'll just make things worse"

[7:50 PM]Sukjong: So I just have to sit and watch?

[7:50 PM]Jangryeol: That's Jang Suk Won's fault anyway, how dare a concubine go against the legal wife?

[7:51 PM]Inhyeon: Listen, all of you!

[7:51 PM]@ Ok Jeong: Do you take the Queen's word so lightly?

[7:51 PM]Ok Jeong: I really was sick...

[7:51 PM]Inhyeon: Lies! I heard you playing the geeomungo!

[7:51 PM]Shall I show you the authority of the legal wife?

[7:52 PM]How arrogant! Why don't you answer?

[7:52 PM]Ok Jeong: You havea ll right to kill me

[7:52 PM]Inhyeon: So you acknowledge your crime?

[7:52 PM]You agree whatever happens is your fault?

[7:52 PM]Ok Jeong: yes, but I am lowly and you are so noble

[7:53 PM]If you do something people think you're jealous, and then you'll lose your dignity

[7:53 PM]And it's fine if I die, but I'm afraid I'm now two lives, not one (pregnant)

[7:53 PM]What do I do, Your Majesty?

[7:54 PM]Ok Jeong's mom hears about what happened

[7:54 PM]Sukjong scolded Inhyeon

[7:54 PM]He said "What happened if Jang Suk Won miscarried bc of you?"

[7:54 PM]Dongpyeong: Her child really saved her since the womb

[7:55 PM]Hee Jae: The King must be so excited

[7:55 PM]Dongpyeong: The Westerners and the Queen must be lamenting

[7:55 PM]Over at the Westerners'...

[7:56 PM]Min Jeong Jung: This is bad!

[7:56 PM]Song Shi Yeol: If that child is a Prince, this will be reeally bad

[7:56 PM]The King will hurry to make him Crown Prince

[7:56 PM]Jeong Jung: We should stop him!

[7:56 PM]Min Yu Jung: We'll have to wait for now

[7:56 PM]Song Shi Yeol: I'm so worried...

[7:57 PM]Ok Jeongis playing the geomungo and reminiscing

[7:57 PM]Flashback to her days as a court maid

[7:57 PM]Reciting the fish poem that court ladies sing when they're lonely

[7:58 PM]Her first night with Sukjong

[7:58 PM]"You shouldn't have come out in the cold"

[7:58 PM]Sukjong: "But the more I see you, the more Iw ant to see you"

[7:58 PM]"Isn't there anything you want?"

[7:58 PM]Ok Jeong: "I don'g need rank or chambers, I'm finwe with your heart"

[7:59 PM]"Greed only brings disaster and the envy of ghosts"

[7:59 PM]"Please, love me unchangingly"

[8:00 PM]Ok Jeong's mom and Jo Sa Seok are here

[8:01 PM]Ok Jeong's telling them about her memories

[8:01 PM]And how she laments her innocence

[8:01 PM]"All I wanted was the King's favor"

[8:01 PM]"Yet that got me kicked out of the Palace"

[8:02 PM]"My uncle got exiled because of me"

[8:02 PM]"I'm a concubine but my family hasn't benefited at all"

[8:02 PM]"If it weren't for Prince Dongpyeong and his family, I'd be on the streets"

[8:03 PM]"Let them curse me! I'll never live the way I did before!"

[8:03 PM]"Jo Sa Seok, it's time I made you a Minister"

[8:03 PM]"Tell Prince Dongpyeong to wait a little loger"

[8:03 PM]"And Mother, tell Brother to wait a little longer too"

[8:04 PM]"I may be a woman, but I'll do better than any man in my family"

[8:04 PM]Jo Sa Seok: Congratulations o n your pregnancy

[8:04 PM]Ok Jeong: did you believe that?

[8:04 PM]I thought you wouldn't

[8:04 PM]I lied ,but it's onot my fault

[8:05 PM]Ok Jeong's mother: how are you going to handle this?

[8:05 PM]Ok Jeong: Don't worry

[8:05 PM]Jo Sa Seok: I'm startled

[8:05 PM]references something about Three Kingdoms' Zhuge Liang

[8:06 PM]The Queen's mother visits the Queen

[8:06 PM]Mom: You look so worried

[8:06 PM]Your father's also worried

[8:07 PM]"I have such a heavy duty as Queen to give birth to a Prince"

[8:07 PM]"Yet I haven't done that - if somethihng happens, what'll happen to me?"

[8:08 PM]"I have no virtue, I bring trouble to my family and the King"

[8:08 PM]"I feel guilty"

[8:08 PM]Mom: Have you been spying on Jang Suk Won?

[8:08 PM]Inhyeon: Yes

[8:08 PM]We're getting along fine

[8:08 PM]Lady Oh: Jang Suk Won's pregnancy is fake!

[8:09 PM]Inhyeon: Not on purpose?

[8:09 PM]Lady Oh: She'd totally lie about this sort of thing

[8:09 PM]She's really a foul woman

[8:10 PM]You must punish her

[8:10 PM]bloody internet

[8:10 PM]Jang Suk Won is outside

[8:10 PM]Lady Cheon: Jang Sku Won wants to apoligize

[8:11 PM]Jang Suk Won: I was totally fooled buy the doctors! (the same thing Inhyeon mentioend previoulsy when she had her false pregnancy)

[8:12 PM]I've fallen to the same thing as you

[8:12 PM]I know you'll blame me for this, but how do I prove myself?

[8:12 PM]Inhyeon: How could I blame you?

[8:12 PM]You must feel so disappointed

[8:12 PM]I once said: "We might be of different background, but we serve the same King"

[8:13 PM]"Let's nont be jealous"

[8:13 PM]"Rain makes the earth strong - let's use this to become closer"

[8:14 PM]Ttosun (Inhyeon's maid) is spying on Ok Jeong

[8:15 PM]Dongpyeong's mother: Everyone's saying the Queen can't give birth

[8:15 PM]Inhyeon is disappointed upon hearing the rumors

[8:15 PM]Sukjong is enjoying tea with Ok Jeong

[8:16 PM]Ok Jeong got rid of her geomungo

[8:16 PM]"Please don't ask why"

[8:16 PM]Sukjong: I find it weird you got rid of it

[8:16 PM]"Was it the Queen?"

[8:17 PM]Ok Jeong: The Queen hates the sound of the geomungo and threatened me to stop playing it

[8:17 PM]She said stop tempting the King or she'll cut off my fingers(edited)

[8:18 PM]Sukjong: She can't do that

[8:18 PM]Ok Jeong: She has all rights to

[8:19 PM]Inhyeon's hearing all the rumors Ok Jeong is spreading

[8:19 PM]Sukjong wonders if Inhyeon really can be that cruel

[8:19 PM]Lady Oh: Jang Suk Won i s so scary

[8:19 PM]Are you just going to take thihs sitting down?

[8:20 PM]Sukjong and Ok Jeong are on a date again but Sukjong's troubled

[8:21 PM]Ok Jeong: The Queen is a benevolent person, why are you worried about her

[8:21 PM]Sukjong: That makes me all the more worried(edited)

[8:21 PM]Some story about men afraid of their wives

[8:26 PM]My connection crrapped out so I only caught the last scene

[8:26 PM]My guess is JAngryeol called Sukjong to her chambers to tell her to throw Ok Jeong back out but like she hasn't actually told him yet

[8:27 PM]We'll see on Sunday!

[jungshookz]

baby, you can drive my car |(mechanic!yoongi)

→ pairing: min yoongi x reader 

→ genre: mechanic!au, spoiltbrat!y/n (++ inexperienced y/n as hiGHLy requested hehe), 6 greasy bois, a taste of richboy!jin, a vintage mercedes benz named beeper, usual dose of crackheadiness, touch of angst, sprinkle of fluff, and bts (big time smut) ((i love recycling this joke don’t come for me)) (((thigh-riding)))

→ trigger warning: there is a brief mention of blood so tread lightly if you feel queaSy about that! 

→ wordcount: 24.6k magic in the air 

→ summary: welcome to min mechanics - what can i do for you today, doll?

→ note: ooh BOY this took me a while! i’m sorry it took me so long to publish this but i hope this bad boy (i’m talking about the fic itself anD mechanic!yoongi) makes up for it! mechanic!yoongi has been in the works for a while... thank you to every single one of you who contributed each of your own lil ideas and helped to create the chArming tattoo-sleeve man we all fuLLY fell in love with. seriously y’all i could not have done this without you!! i ain’t gon lie i was going to post this on the day of the comeback but i think i needed a day to just.,.,, SCREAM and listen to the album.,.,,.  (and also i was still editing it yikes) ((and also what do u guys think of the new albUM hELLO)) so here it is twO days after the comeback!!!!!!! i hope i gave you sufficient time to recover from the new album but if not oH well what can ya do!!! also i’m really friCkin nervous for some reason but nonetheless enjoy the ride! ( 灬♥ 3 ♥灬)

pst if u wanna talk to y/n or yoongi u know what to do ;-)

(gif isn’t mine!)

(((and the read more function iS there but most of the time it doesn’t work on mobile :// i am sorry don’t attack me by sending passive-aggressive anon messages)))

you know what

you could totally get used to this being an adult thing

you finally get to live in your own place

you finally get to eat whatever the heck you wanna eat

and most importantly

you finally get a car

yes, you’ll admit, you’re a little behind with the whole car thing

most of your friends already got their licenses befoRe becoming adults but so what if you were a little slow!!! you were just living life as a teenager!!!! there was no rush

let’s not beat around the bush here

you are: a spoilt brat

like unbelievably so

when you were younger all you’d have to do is point at something and your parents would immediately be like ….aight

now that you’re older it’s kinda the same except they’ve just given you a bunch of credit cards so now you don’t have to ask anyone you can just go out and get it yourself

but this car

this sweet sweet car that belongs to you

(to be moRe specific it’s a 1962 mercedes benz baby blue convertible that you’ve affectionately named beeper)

((you knoW that shit be fancy when it’s from the dang 60s))

this is the first BIG purchase you’ve made and you’re feeling pretty proud of yourself anD you’re feeling extra adult-y  

anyways you’re heading back to your penthouse now because it’s been a busy day!!

you had class in the morning and then you went and got your nails done to reward yourself for going to class (a manicure anD a pedicure because why would you not do your toes if you’re doing your fingers that just wouldn’t be fair to your toes) and then you went and got a venti coffee frappucino from starbucks

you reach over and adjust the front mirror a bit and take a second to admire your brand new YSL heart-shaped sunglasses (they’re SO cute n u have them in three different colours)

you’re already thinking about what you want for dinner

maybe you can order some sushi or something

you could go for a dynamite roll or something

maybe some gyoza dumplings too

oOh you should also get some seaweed salad because that-

prrt prruT prrt prRRrRRRRRrr

oh my god

no way

“oh my god, no way.” your heart drops to your stomach when beeper starts sputtering and coughing and slowing d o w n

oh god

oh god oh god oh god

okay

it’s fine

it’s fine don’t worry about it

thankfully beeper stopped riGht as the light turned red so you have some time to try and get him up and running again

okay

what can you do

what does this button do

click

oH okay those are the windshield wipers and you don’t need those

you twist a knob and curse to yourself when the radio turns on

ok what about thiS knob

“chRist-“ cold air starts blasting riGht into your face and you turn the knob back down

you step down on the gas pedal and nothing happens

what do you do whAT do you DO

you probably have like 20 seconds left before the light turns green and you have to get going

ooooOOOoOh you don’t want the people behind you to honk at you

that’s going to stress you out

you don’t want to be honked at!!!!!!!!!

usually when something bad happens you just.,. throw some money on it and it goes away

in this case you can technically throw money at it

let’s rephrase this

usually when something bad happens you just throw some money at a person and it goes away because they take care of the problem foR you

but the difference here is that you are all alone

in this big city

and your parents are miles away

and no one is here to help you

ooh!!!! ooh!!!!!! google a car repair shop!!!! goOGLE IT

you reach into your purse and pull your phone out quickly

“car repair shops near me…” you mutter to yourself as you type into the google search bar

you jump in surprise when the car behind you honks at you and you give them a sheepish smile and a shrug

“c’mon, c’mon.,.,,” you smack the steering wheel in frustration but quickly rub over the wheel apologetically  

beeper coughs before jerking and you feel a wave of relief wash over you when it starts moving again

okay

according to google maps the nearest repair shop is a minute drive away

okay okay okay

should be doable

it appears that the gods are somewhat on your side today because beeper breaks down officially right as you drive up to the front of the repair shop

luckily no one was on the sidewalk when you nyOomed up because half of your car is on the sidewalk and the other half is on the street and you’re not looking to run anyone over today

“stupid car.” you mutter as you slam the door shut “…sorry buddy.” you wince apologetically and pat the hood because you certainly wouldn’t want to be spoken to like that if you were a car

you look up at the rusting sign hanging above the large garage

‘min mechanics’

“min mechanics.” you stand in front of the large open garage and inspect the inside

is this place good enough for beeper

it seems like it’s doing pretty well

there are at least eight cars all parked on either sides of the place

in the very back in the left corner there’s an office kinda thing  

there’s a sign hanging on top of the door that says ‘front desk’

okay so that seems like a logical place to go to

you’re a little wary just leaving your car out here with nobody to watch it but it’s not like you have a choice

you walk in further and adjust your purse strap on your shoulder

what heCk

there’s like nobody here

there better be somebody here otherwise you’re going to get your dad to sue

just kidding

but not really

“uh, hellOOooOOo??” your boots clack against the concrete as you walk deeper into the garage

you push your sunglasses up onto the top of your head before placing a hand on your hip

“is anybody here??? someone needs to fix my car, please!!!” you approach the truck that’s just sitting in the middle of the garage and that’s when you notice a pair of legs under the truck

oh my god

someone’s been CRUSHED By a TRUCK

oh HELL no you are getting out of here you’re going to pretend like you weren’t even here in the first place

“sorry, gimme a sec!” the legs twitch and you let out a breath of relief

whoever this person is rolls out from under the truck smoothly and gets up onto their feet

oh

hello

he wipes his cheek with the back of his hand and gets grease smudged over his cheekbone with a scowl before wiping his grubby hands on his rag

soft icy-blue hair  

almost cat-like eyes

sharp jawline

very pretty hands

he tosses the dirty rag over his shoulder and you definitely don’t miss the way his bicep flexes

you glance down at the name embroidered in yellow thread into the chest pocket of his navy blue jumpsuit

𝓎𝑜𝑜𝓃𝑔𝒾

cute name for a cuter boy

he looks up at you and falters a bit

obviously he’s a liTTle taken aback because what’s a girl like you doing at a place like this??

you don’t miss the way his eyes scan over your figure

a cream coloured blouse tucked into a pair of skinny blue jeans

a pair of chunky leather boots that look like they cost more than his entire life

the little gucci purse

and of course

the heart shaped sunglasses

hm

“what can i help you with, doll?” he offers you a smirk and a tilt of the head and suddenly you think you’ve forgotten how to breathe

you don’t think that pet name should affect you as much as it does

holy shiT this is one pretty boy

he pushes his sleeves up and that’S when you notice that one of his arms is covered with tattoos

holy moly

“i… car’s broken. my car. my car’s broken.” you stumble over your words

“you… car’s broken, huh?” he teases before glancing over your shoulder “is that it outside?”

you nod quickly and look back at your car

aw

poor beeper

you didn’t even get to drive him that much and he already diED on you

you should’ve asked for a range rover instead

once again it’s from the 60s

you probably should’ve stopped right then and there

but it’s so cute!!!!!!!

“is that a 1962 mercerdes benz??” ‘yoongi’ gasps and moves past you towards beeper “holy shiT i’ve only seen those in pictures”

“it’s pretty cool, i guess.” you shrug casually and watch as he continues to marvel over your car “but yeah, do you think you can fix him?”

“him?”

“…his name is beeper.” you admit shyly and yoongi laughs lightly and nods understandably

“cute. and yes, i’ll take care of beeper for you, don’t worry. give me some time to poke around and see what the issue is.” he pats beeper’s hood before gesturing over to the back of the garage “you can chill out in the office if you want, or there’s a starbucks down the street. it’s pretty muggy in the garage and i wouldn’t want you to scuff up your gucci purse.”

his eyes flicker towards the little black bag nestled against your side

you clear your throat and tuck it behind you bashfully

“i’m yoongi, by the way.” he sticks his hand out and you look down at it

you can see some greASy residue from the truck that he was fixing earlier but you tell yourself to man up and you reach over and take his hand

oh my god his hand is s t i c k y

ew!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“i’m y/n. thank you for helping me out.”

“of course, i’m happy to help.” yoongi offers you a boyish smile and you decide right then and there that you don’t mind his sticky hands at all

the bell tinkles lightly as you push the frosted glass door open and step into the air-conditioned office

hey the office is a lot bigger than you thought it’d be

and definitely a lot nicer than you thought it’d be (no offence)

there’s a front counter and an empty wheely chair behind it

oH and there’s another door that leads into a more ~private~ office but it’s closed so you can’t sneak a peek inside

on the counter there’s a little bell and next to it is a hEfty jar of lollipops

behind the counter is a cork board with a bunch of car keys hanging from pushpins all lined up in a neat row

a couple sticky notes pinned up

four plastic chairs sitting on the side (you’re assuming this is the waiting area)

in the corner there’s a little table with a stack of magazines

and in the other corner there’s a water dispenser

the ceiling fan whirs above you as you head over to the front desk

these lollipops look tempting

you wonder if they’re complimentary or if yoongi is just a sugar addict

you reach into the jar and grab one quickly and drop it into your purse

the chair squeaks underneath you as you take a seat and you shift to get comfortable

you reach up to push your sunglasses up because they start to slide down a little

a breath slips past your lips

you wonder how long yoongi’s going to take

and then you wonder if you’re going to have to get a new car

maybe you should go car shopping after this

hot tip: avoid cars from the 60s

“well i figured out what was wrong with your car” you jump when the door opens abruptly

you stand up from the seat and smooth your blouse down a little “what’s wrong with it?? what do i need to get fixed and how much is it all going to cost??”

“uh, not that much consider what was wrong was that the gas tank was empty.”

…

oh

my

god

you’re a moron

you are an idiot

a F O O L

you clear your throat and feel your cheeks starting to burn a lil

this is uh

this is kinda embarrassing

“are you… sure? that’s it? the gas tank was empty? there’s really nothing else wrong with him?”

“mhm.” yoongi nods and makes his way over behind the front desk “i did a full body check on beeper and everything else is working just fine! he just needed a tank of juice, so i filled up for you. he’s good to go!” he unwraps a lollipop and sticks it into his mouth  

“oh, okay. um-“ you unzip your purse and rifle through it for your wallet “how much do i owe you?”

“nothing”

“noth- gas is free???? holy shit. i did not know that.” you scoff in surprise and put your wallet away

yoongi’s brows furrow and he gives you a smile “no, gas isn’t free, doll. i’m giving you a get outta jail free card, so next time beeper ‘breaks down’ you’ll know he’s just out of gas.”

“oh… oH no no you don’t have to do that here lemme give you-“

“hey, seriously - it’s fine.” yoongi hands you your keys back before spinning you around and leading you out the door with a hand placed on the small of your back  

“but-“

“but nothing! i don’t wanna hear it.” he teases as he opens the door up for you and nudges you inside

he closes the door gently and bends down a little “it was nice doin’ business with you. take care of yourself now.”

“thanks for making me look like a fool in front of a cute boy today, beeper.” you sigh as you step out of the car and close the door

beep beep !

you drop your keys into your purse after locking beeper up and you make your way over to the elevator that goes up to the penthouse

as you wait for the elevator to take you up to your floor you shove your hand into your purse for your house keys and you end up pulling out

a yellow lollipop

you stare at it for a second and blink at it owlishly

no

y/n

he’s a mechanic

your dad’s a businessman!!!!!!!!!  

you need to go after a CEO boy not a CAR boy

you’re sure there are plenty of nice CEO boys in the city

you unwrap the lollipop and stick it into your mouth

hm

mango!

the elevator dings and the doors slide open

you step out into the hallway and twirl your keys around your finger

yeah

it’d be good for you

just forget about the silly car boy

three days later

ok so listen

uh

you know how you said it’d be good to just forget about the silly car boy

ya

that did not happen

you don’t usually do stupid things

but this?

this thing that you have just done??

now THIS was stupid

you might’ve maybe kinda sorta possibly clobbered one of your side mirrors with a baseball bat so that it’d break off because a teeny weeny (huge huGe) part of you wanted to see yoongi again

after the whole stare off with the lollipop in the elevator you just had this itching feeling all over your body

there’s just something about him and you can’t quite put your finger on it

maybe it’s because he’s so..,,.,,., cool? like that’s the only word you have to describe him right now lol

he’s just.,.,,.., he’s so different compared to all the other boys you’ve ever been interested in

god

he’s such a man that’s what he is

the bad boy of your wildest dreams

anyways uh

“….oh boy.” so now you have a baseball bat in one hand and a side mirror in the other

if someone were to walk into the garage right now it’d look like you just damaged someone else’s car

and it’s not like you can say ‘oh, don’t worry! it’s just my car, trust me!!!’ and wave the baseball at them because then they’d be like wtf why did u just fuck up ur own car

well

now it’s too late

you gosh darn wrecked your vintage car all because you want to see a cute mechanic

you couldn’t have just walked in there like a normal person to say hi!!!!!

you could’ve gone in there with an envelope of money and been like oh i just felt bad about not paying so i hAd to come and pay you back!!!

you did this on purpose because you wanted! to! see! yoongi! again!

and unsurprisingly

you always get what you want

“how did this happen again?”

“…i backed up into my garage all weird…?” you’re not being very convincing right now in case that wasn’t already super obvious  

“…huh.”

see

yoongi knows his cars

he’s been working with them for a long time (fun fact he picked up his first screwdriver and helped his dad in the shop when he was just three years old!!!!)

and this doesn’t look like you backed your car into the garage and accidentally knocked it into the side of a wall

it looks like it’s been battered

and he can’t help but think that you were the one who fucked your car up

because there’s a huge dent on the top part of it (he’s assuming this was your first hit) and a loT of mini dents around it (which was a result of you panicking when it didn’t fall off the first time so you continued whacking it everywhere) anD the way the mirror cracked suggests that something was hitting it straIGHt on

so you must’ve been parking your car really weirdly if you actually knocked it off while parking

this looks like it was done purposely

yoongi looks up from the mirror at you

“so… can you fix it?”

a little smirk twitches at the corner of his mouth

alright

he’ll bite

“i mean, it would’ve been easier if the mirror wasn’t completely destroyed-” yoongi holds it up and you wince a little at the sight of the wires dangling from where you riPPed it off “i’m going to have to order a new mirror - it’s probably going to cost a pretty penny considering this is a vintage car, but i’ll be sure to find the best deal for you.”

“you’re welcome to leave beeper here oR you can always just bring him back when the mirror comes in because everything else is working perfectly fine.”

“i’ll leave him here-!” you respond immediately “…if that’s okay with you, of course.”

“that’s perfectly fine with me.” he holds his hand out and your eyes flicker down to it

even his hand is pretty

you’re not..,. sure why he’s holding his hand out

is he trying to shake your hand??

you slowly raise your hand before gently placing it over his

yoongi blinks twice and looks back up at you

you look back at him

“…i need your keys.”

OH

oH MY GOD

oh my god

“i knew that!” you rIP your hand away before shoving it into your purse

your face is honestly probably on fire right now

love that for you

you drop your keys into yoongi’s palm with a jingle and yoongi smirks because now it seems like you’re avoiding eye contact with him

he smirks lightly as he tucks your keys into his back pocket

“at least buy me dinner first before touching me like that, doll.”

ok

you need to leave NOW

this is MORTIFyiNG

you are in the midst of an internal conflict

see, the thing is

you’re not quite sure if you’re crossing the line from charming to downright creepy

let’s unpack this

charming = treating someone to lunch

creepy = treating someone to lunch when you’ve only spoken to him for a total of like 3 minutes

charming = bringing lunch to someone at their workplace

creepy = bringing lunch to someone at their workplace and virtually giving them no choice but to sit down and eat lunch with you becausE you bROUGHt lunch to their woRKPLACE

charming = y/n y/l/n when she like someone

creepy = y/n y/l/n when she really really likes someone

charm-

oh!!!! a pair of legs under a truck!!!!!!!

you pick up the pace and head straIght for truck

“hey!” you knock twice against the side to get yoongi’s attention and you can’t help but bounce up on your toes a little in excitement

you look into the takeout bag to make sure nothing is leaking “i know the car isn’t ready yet but i just wanted to stop by and thank you for-“

“well hey to you too” you step back when you look down to see someone who definitely isn’t yoongi but is also juSt as pretty as yoongi

he takes his cap off and pushes his hair back before putting his hat on backwards

“you aren’t yoongi” you squeak out and wrinkle your nose “i’m so sorry, i thought you were someone else.”

“my name is jungkook bUT i’d be happy to be yoongi if you’d like” he gets up off the ground and wipes his hands on the back of his jumpsuit

he flashes you a charming smile and you feel a little overwheLmed

“get bACk to work you moron” you and the yoongi impoSter both look to the left and you smile excitedly when you see who it is “hello - again.” he teases “your car isn’t ready yet, if that’s what you’re here for.”

“i know, i’m not here for the car.” you blurt out and yoongi’s eyes widen slightly in surprise

he pokes his tongue into his cheek and raises a brow before smirking at you

“huh. i see. so what are you here for then?”

“i-“

“yoongi, aren’t you going to introduce us to the pretty lady?” you turn to look over your shoulder and you’re suddenly overwhelmed because there are one two three four five boys standing behind you like a floCK of pigeons

yoongi lets out a sigh

sometimes he wished he worked alone

you can’t help but think that this mechanics shop is just a cover up for some kind of cult

because uh

every single one of these boys are beautiful

taehyung is in charge of paint jobs and customisations

namjoon is in charge of office-related things like contracts and paperwork and finances and things along that line

hoseok takes care of washing cars

and jimin is an excellent polisher (he promised you you’d get beeper back nice and sparKly even though all you have to do is replace the side mirror)

and jungkook..,.,. kind of bounces everywhere (apparently he’s just working here for the summer so he doesn’t have a designated responsibility)

last you saw him he was under a truck and now he’s helping jimin with the buffing

“now that you know everybody- sorry about that, by the way - what brings you here today?”

“i brought you some lunch as a thank you for… giving me free gas.”  

huh

“oh! thank you so much, that’s very sweet of you.” yoongi smiles and rubs his hands together “i haven’t eaten lunch yet so you came at the riGht time!”

niCE

okay this is good

yoongi can’t help but wonder how much you spent on lunch because even the takeout bag itself looks hella fancy

le petit bistro

obviously it’s some french place

and most of the time french places are hella fancy

he suggested you guys eat in his office so that you’d have a liL more privacy (he knows for a fact that the moment you guys pull food out the others are going to swarm around you and ask to donate some bites to them) and also you probably don’t want to smell petrol while eating lunch lol

you went to go wash your hands so yoongi took the opportunity to sneak a glance at the receipt to confirm his suspicions

and needless to say

he is SHOOK

jesus christ

$45???? for a SANDWICH??? one single sandwich????

the water was $8????

what the hell

.,.,,.negative sides of capitalism

well now he can’t help but wonder how loaded you actually are

he’s not going to lie

it’s slightly intimidating to be around someone practically oozing with money

“-i wasn’t sure what kind of sandwiches you liked so i got a croque monsieur for you, i hope that’s okay!” yoongi drops the receipt back into the bag quickly and shifts in his seat as you step into the office

“oh no, that’s totally fine! i love..,. croc monsters.” he clears his throat “what did you get for yourself?”

“a pan bagnat.” you plop down next to him before reaching into the bag

a pain what now

a pain bandaid?????

what the hell kind of words are leaving your mouth right now lol

“remind me what a… ᶜʳᵒᶜ ᵐᵒⁿˢᵗᵉʳ is again?” yoongi takes the box from you and pops it open

it kinda just looks like a plain ol sandwich

.,.,is that a gold leaf on top of it

“it’s just a fanCy ham and cheese sandwich….also did u just call it a croc monster”

yoongi pauses

“….did u just call it a croc monster?” yoongi bites into the sandwich and-

oH mY GOD

if u weren’t in the room with him he’s positive he would’ve busted a nut

holy SHIT that is a good ham and cheese sandwich

his ham and cheese sandwiches neVer taste this good!!!!!!!

“you want a bite of mine?”

“what’s yours?”

“a pan bagnat.” yoongi contemplates this for a second before shrugging and leaning in for a bite but you quiCkly pull back

he raises a brow

did u change ur mind

“say it.”

say wat

“…thank you?”

“no, no. say it.”

“say what?”

“the name of the sandwich.” you smirk

oh NO

you are a sICk, twiSted individual

the thing is

he knows it’s pan bagnat

but he can’t saY pan bagnat

but he KNOWS it’s pAN BAGNAT OKAY

he knows that you pronounced it pahn ban-yay

so he too will pronounce it pahn ban-yay

he clears his throat

“…pain bandaid.”

o dear god

“okay, so you got that one because jungkook dared you to???” you giggle and trace your fingers over the oFFending tattoo

“yep. he kept saying i didn’t have the balls to do it and the next thing i know i’m sitting in a tattoo parlour getting an angry cookie tattooed on the inside of my bicep.” he snorts and jabs it “luckily i have a whole sLeeve of tattoos to distract from shooky.”

“you nAMed him??”

“jungkook did!!!”

you trail your eyes over the rest of his tattoos

your favourite so far (and it’s the biggest one) is of a cherry blossom tree

the way the branches and twigs wrap around his arms is just so beautiful and the baby pink of the cherry blossoms are just so!!! cute!!!!!!!

“how about your hair, then? unless you were born with a head of shockingly icy-blue hair.”

“well, i got drunk on my birthday. and then i woke up with bleached hair, which was traumatising, as you can probably imagine. i wasn’t a fan of completely whiTE hair so i just bought some dye from the drug store and it came out to be this soft blue-grey kinda colour.” yoongi crosses his eyes as he pinches a couple strands of hair in between his fingers

“i don’t know if i could ever do that to my hair.” you murmur and look at your own strands of hair “my scalp would probably die on me.”

“my scalp is already fuLLy dead, so i don’t really care anymore.”

“does that mean you’ll let me dye your hair neon green?”

“…we’ll have to talk about that one first.”

yoongi nearly shits himself when he realises he’s gone twO hours over his lunch break

omg

he has so much to do today he has to go back to work

even though he’s the boss and can take as many lunch breaks as he wants it doesn’t maTTer

“you got any plans for the rest of the day?” yoongi crumples his napkin up and shOots it into the bin

“not really!” you wipe your mouth and put the soiled napkin into the takeout box before putting thAt back into the takeout bag

“here, i’ll throw that out in the back for you.” yoongi picks the bag up and tucks his own box into it as well

“thank you- i dO have some work do to later but hey, you wouldn’t mind if i just hung out here, right?”

yoongi pauses on his way to the door and turns back to look at you

“you wanna hang out… here?” yoongi furrows his brows in confusion “like here-here?”

you shrug

“it just gets preTTy boring at the apartment when i’m all alone”

“well, uh, i guess i don’t see any problem with you hanging out here. i’m just going to be out there with the others, so let me know if you need anything”

??????

yoongi doesn’t usually have to play the role of a hOSt when his customers are around

“cool!!! i’ll trY not to burn anything down”

yoongi smiles to himself and shakes his head before leaving the office

hm

you are a very peculiar girl

and so it goes

you find yourself zipping straiGht to min mechanics as soon as you’re done with classes for the day (you don’t go everyday just because you feel like that’s kinDa creepy and very veRy clingy so you limit yourself to like three or four days a week)

luckily yoongi’s shop is only a 20 minute uber ride away (you were vEry tempted to buy a new car to take over beeper’s place for the time-being but you figured it’d be best to spend your money on things like… groceries??) so he’s not toO out of the way which is good!!!!!!

although you have a feeling that even if yoongi was 3 hours away you’d stiLL make the trip to see him

and although it seems like you’re just there to check up on beeper because yOu miSs hIm it’s fairly obvious you have a lil thing for yoongi

“hey, um, just outta curiosity - how old is yoongi?” you adjust on the stool and avoid jungkook’s gaze when he turns back to look at you

he glances over at yoongi “he just turned 26! he’s an old man” jungkook snorts and goes back to wiping down the windows

26

that’s.,.,.,. uh

that’s kinda hot

you cross your legs and prop an elbow up on your knee before propping your chin up on your palm and you let out a dreamy sigh

everyThing about yoongi is kinda hot

the way he rolls his sleeves up to expose his forearms when he’s about to get down and diRty gets your gears grinding

or when his tongue swipes over his bottom lip after he’s taken a swig of water

or how deep n rasPy is voice gets sometimes

not to mention his tattoo sleeve

you haven’t gotten a good look at it yet but you’re not complaining because it makes him fall into the bad boy category and you are a HOE for that

“i’m 22, by the way. much, much younger than yoongi.” jungkook points out and turns around to lean against the truck

“mm, that’s cool, kook.” you smile although your eyes are glued on a certain someone else  

jungkook snorts and rolls his eyes

maybe he should get a tattoo sleeve

“you know she’s staring at you again”

yoongi has to bite back a smile to keep himself from looking like a smitten schOOlgirl  “is she?” he asks casually and flips to the next page of the catalogue

he glances over his shoulder and sure enough you’re staring right at him

of course the moment you get caught you quickly look up and pretend like the ceiling fans whirring above are the most interesting things you’ve ever seen in your entire life

“she’s cute”

“i know” yoongi looks up and narrows his eyes at hoseok who is… stiLL staring at you

yoongi takes a step to the side so that he’s blocking hoseok’s line of sight “don’t you have a tire to change or something?”

hoseok immediately raises his hands in defense

“all i’m impLYing is that if you don’t do something soon i might have to hop on that and take her for a ride-” hoseok yelps when yoongi rolls up the catalogue and suddenly starts smacking him with it

“get baCK to work before i FIRE you”

“whatcha eating?” you glance up from your magazine when you become acutely aware that you are no longer alone due to the fact that there are three shadows blocking you from the sun

ah yes

the three amigos

jimin taehyung and lil ol jungkook

you know exactly what they want

you swallow your bite and use your chopsticks to gesture to the takeout box of sushi (it’s a dynamite roll (your fave!!!!) from this amazing sushi place called nori) sitting on the little table next to you “sushi.” you flip to the next page of the magazine

“what…. kind of sushi?”  

“dynamite roll.”

you hear them murmuring to each other and the only thing you manage to make out is a ‘u think she’ll let us try’

yeah

it is always a mistake to bring food here but for some reason you don’t listen to yourself and you always bring food here

and u know what maybe this is just because ur kind of selfish (especially when it comes to the dynamite rolls from nori) but u don’t really want to give them a bite but at the same time you know for sure they’re not going to leave you alone til you let them try

“cool, cool.” taehyung clears his throat

you give them all an unimpressed look before snorting in amusement and picking up the takeout box then holding it up for them

“one piece each.”

and the gates of hell swing open

he immEdiately opens his mouth and sucks it in like a vacuum cleaner

and then you offer a piece to jimin

and then you offer a piece to jungkook

and once they’re all satisfied they finally leave you alone

now you’re down 3 pieces of sushi but it’s finE

you don’t think of yourself as a person who puts effort into things unless you’re parTicularly passionate about something

and you just so happen to be vERY passionate about (1) min yoongi so you surprise yourself when you realise that instead of spending thursday evening watching netflix, you spend three hours doing research on the different parts of a car juSt so you can go into min mechanics and blow yoongi’s MIND

u want to impress him ok it’s not a big deal!!!!!!!!

anyways

you have a couple bullet points that you scribbled down on your palm jUSt in case

you are READY to impress the heck out of yoongi

“that radiator sure looks busted, huh?” you peek over yoongi’s shoulder and take a step back when he turns to look at you “you should probably check the coolant levels.”

yoongi furrows his brows in confusion

what is happening

it doesn’t make sense that you suddenly have a very vAst knowledge of cars considering the fact that you thought your car was broken when it was literally just out of gas

.,.,.,what is going on

“that is the radiator, you’re correct. and it is busted.” you smile proudly and give yourself a mental pat on the back and it is pretty busted. “there’s a blown fuse and a couple of wires are corroded.”

“have you checked the lower radiator tank?”

“uh- yes, i checked that. i don’t really need to check the lower tank if i’m looking at an electrical problem though.”

uh oh

we’re starting to go downhill

quICK say something else

you unfurl your fingers and glance down at the messy scribbles on your palm (the ink is starting to bleed because ur starting to get nErvous and your palms always get clammy)

“how about the coolant?”

“don’t need to check coolant levels either.” yoongi hums and reaches over to untwist the tank cap “and you already mentioned the coolant levels earlier-“

and then it hits him

it finally hits him

his fingers freeze on the cap momentarily

oh

bless your heart

he pressed his lips together to keep himself from smiling too widely “-but if it makes you feel any better i’ll check the coolant levels again?”

“no, no! if you don’t need to check it, then you don’t have to.” you clear your throat “the… the fan clutch is… you should check that too. the fan clutch is… it’s a vital part of the radiator.”

“say, i have a question for you.” yoongi spins around and leans back against the car

“mhm?”

“what exactly does the radiator do, y/n?” he raises a brow before crossing his arms

you know this

oh my god you KNOW this

you literally read a 12 page document talking specifically about radiators HOW the hell are you BLANKING right now

okay fine

just play it cool

if you act like you know what you’re talking about it’ll be more convincing

“it…” you kiss your teeth before glancing down at the radIatoR “it… radiates… um, it radiates energy so that the car is able to… move.” you explain as conFidently as you possibly

“and what’s a fan clutch?”

“oh! you know, it’s the part that just…” you shake your fist in the air “just… clutches the fan, y’know? keeps it in place.”

“huh. that’s right.” yoongi cocks his head

wait what

holy shit

you’re a genius

you are a GENIUS  

“i am???”

“no.” he deadpans and smirks when you scowl playfully “you’re cute, though.”

.,,.,.frick

“good morning, namjoon.” yoongi hums as he steps into the office with a biG bag of lollipops

“morning…?” this is vEry unfamiliar territory because the last time yoongi said good morning to namjoon it was on his birthday

well

it’s best not to question it

he should just enjOy sociable yoongi “you seem extra chipper this morning!” namjoon points out

“do i?” yoongi pulls the lid off the glass jar and sets it aside

click clack click clack

the lollipops hit the side of the jar as yoongi fills it aLL the way up

he turns to toss the bag away into the bin

namjoon pulls a lollipop out of the jar before furrowing his brows

he twists the treat in between his fingers and takes note of the little cartoon strawberries on the wrapper “i thought you were a raspberry man?”

“i am” yoongi plucks the lollipop from namjoon’s fingers and plunks it into the jar before covering it up

“but all of these are strawberry flavoured.”

“yes, and?”

namjoon raises his hands in defence “nothing! just saying.”

how very odd

yoongi despises strawberry

“hi namjoon!” the little bell tinkers as you step into the office

“y/n, hey! how was your day? yoongi’s in the middle of a call but he’ll be out soon.”

“it was okay! i got my essay back and i did pretty well- oOH strawberry” you gasp and iMMediately shoVe your hand into the jar

there it is

the final piece of the puzzle

it all makes sense now

“huh.” namjoon leans back against his chair and crosses his arms as he watches you unwrap the lollipop excitedly

“whaht?” you ask aroUnd the lollipop and namjoon shakes his head

“oh, nothing.”

interesting

vEry interesting

yoongi despises strawberry but it seems like he doesn’t despise you

it is univERsally known that sundays are meant to be day-offs

you’re supposed to sleep in on sundays

you go out for bRUnch on sundays

you most certainly don’t wake up at 8am and spend twO hours getting ready and then take an uber down to the mechanics shop to see the cute boy who works there

normal people don’t dO THAT

“what are you doing here? it’s sunday…” even yoongi is confused as to why you’re here

hE doesn’t even want to be here

“i know, i just… y’know, i was bored, so-“

“you came all the way here because you were bored?” yoongi’s brows knit together and you feel your cheeks flush

you reach up to scratch the back of your neck before pursing your lips “…yes?” you look around and realise that no one else is in sight “where is everyone?”

“…it’s sunday.” yoongi teases and brings his attention back to the faulty hose in his hands

god

what is wrong with the hose today yoongi slaps it against his palm a couple of times

his brows furrow in frustration before he gives it a good tWisT-

SCHKKKKKKKKKK

oH Okay there it is

“there we go!” yoongi twists it back to turn it off “i think i might need to invest in a new hose because i just wasted like 10 minutes trying to turn it on“ he looks up at you

OH MY GOD

you’re gawkinG like a fish and all the blood drains from yoongi’s face when he realizes what just happened  

oh mygOD

he’s going to have to work for the rest of his life to pay for your dry cleaning

he’s going to have to sell his shop and that won’t even be enough to cover the cost of cleaning your gucci purse

“y/n… shit… i am sO sorry….” yoongi swallows thickly because you still haven’t responded  

you drop your purse on the floor and yoongi presses his lips together

t-the gucci is soaking wet

ᵗʰᵉ ᵍᵘᶜᶜᶦ ᶦˢ ˢᵒᵃᵏᶦⁿᵍ ʷᵉᵗ

hooOooOOOLY SHit he wants to die

he wants to die!!!!!!!!!!!

he wants to guZZLe a gallon of petrol and just DIE

you’re going to sue him

no

you’re going to get your dad to sue him which is even worse

he drops the hose to the floor with a clatter before turning to grab the rag sitting on the hood of the truck  

“i’ll get you another towel but you can use this to dry off for no- WHAT-“ not even a seCOND goes by and all of a sudden there’s water being dumpED right on top of him  

and to make matters worse

this is soapy water used to wash the car

he’s dripping with dirty soapy water from head to toe

“there. now we’re even!” you let out a sigh and set the bucket down before wiping your hands on the back of your leggings even though that does absolutely NOTHING

“…you have three seconds.”

you’re still wiping your hands on your leggings “three seconds to- oH MY GOD WAIT-“ you begin sprinting as soon as yoongi moves into action and the next thing you know he’s chasing you around the garage with the hose

you two are acting like chiLDREN

“yOONGI NO” you shriek when you feel cold water blast against you once again

your guys laughter bounces off the walls of the garage along with the occasional screEch from you

“get away from me you freAK-“ yoongi cackles when he gets a good blast of water right against your butt causing you to scream even louDer than you already were

you can feel him gaining on you because the pressure of the water is starting to get stronger and stronger

you let out a shriek before bursting into laughter when yoongi wraps his arm around you from behind and you immediately start squirming in his grip

you manage to turn around and the two of you start baTTling for the hose

“giVE it to mE-“ you squeeze your eyes shut because you’re sure getting blasted in the eyeball with water won’t be nice

“over my dead body!!!!!!” yoongi laughs and starts tickling your sides with his free hand

“min yooNGI it’s my turn to-“

“get your grUbby hands off the-“

of course

the floor is now slippery as hell (and yoongi’s water bill is going to be hIGH this month if you two keep going at it lol)

so of course

“woAH-!“

“oh SHIt-“

the nExt thing you know you’re staring up at

well

you’re staring right up at yoongi

“i-“ you have no idea why but your fingers are wrapped around his soaKing wet bicep and you quickly let go and place your hands on either side of you like a damn corpse “hi.”

the hose has been completely abandoned next to you guys and it’s still spurting out water

“hey.” he pants from the exertion of chasing you around the garage and his eyes flicker down to your lips veRy briefly you’re not sure it even happened

he’s settled riGht in between your legs and once you realise this your cheeks flame up

oh my god

dO something

“call it a truce?” you offer meekly and yoongi raises a brow before nodding once

“…i suppose so.” you yeLp in surprise when he suddenly shakes his hair out like a dog and practically assaults you with droplets of water

you scowl playfully and wipe at your cheek

yoongi grins down at you and gets off of you

he stands up and looks down at his sopping wet jumpsuit before offering you a hand “c’mon.” he jerks his head towards the office “let’s dry you up, doll.”

you wring the water out of your blouse and yelp quietly when you feel cold droplets of water splatter onto your bare foot

also

this YSL mascara was noT worth the money because you look like a raccoon right now

“i have an extra shirt somewhere… ah, here we are!”

you look at yoongi in the mirror of your compact as he emerges from the office with a-

oh good god

what is that

you clap your compact shut and tuck it back into your purse before spinning around and letting your eyes trail down to the….

can u even call that a shirt

“i refuse to put that thing on my body.” you can’t even bring yourself to reach out and take the raggedy denim button-up from yoongi because it just looks so.,.,.,.,.,. grOSS

“aw, c’mon! it’s cute! denim is super trendy.”

“why is it so dirty??”

“they’re just grease stains!! i swear!” yoongi brings the shirt up to his nose and takes a fAT whiff “anD i washed it!”

“well you can either wear this oR you can wear your sopping wet clothes.” yoongi points to the garBage bag containing all your soaking wet belongings and you let out a groan before reaching out and taking the shirt from him

“if it’ll make you feel better i have a pen here and i can just write gucci on the label!”

“ha-ha, very funny.,,., i accept louis vuitton as well”

“i’m going to see if i have any clothes for myself” yoongi disappears into the office again and you work quickly to rip your soPping wet clothes off as quickly as possible

“you know, i can always hook you up with some better quality shirts!” you start buttoning yourself up and you bring your arm up to your nose to give the sleeve a little sniff

it smells like his cologne >:)

you tug the shirt down a little bit and look behind you to make sure your ass isn’t hanging out and saying peekaboo

it’s big enough to the point where it covers everything appropriately and also it reaches mid-thigh

but if you bent down you’d definitely be giving everyone a show lol

“we can stick your logo on the back and everything-“

“sorry, what’d you say? i didn’t catch that.”

you turn around to face yoongi “i was saying that i- oH“

o-OH My GO D

R E D  A L E R T

your heart literally stops at the sight of a very, very shirtless yoongi

he shakes his hair out before running a hand through it with a sigh “luckily i had some spare clothes here otherwise i’d have to drive you home completely naked…”

you are bAREly paying attention to a word he is saying right now

this is it

min yoongi is one of the seven wonders of the world

he has a pair of grey sweatpants hanging low on his hips and not to be nsfW but he might,..,,. not be wearing any briefs right now.,..,

you glance back up at his face and clear your throat when you realise he’s staring right back at you with the teeniest of smirks

“what’s the matter, doll? cat got your tongue?”

the cat don’t but that diCK dO

“your carriage awaits, madam” yoongi bows and gestures towards his pick up truck

“why, thank you, kind sir.” you gladly take his hand and he helps you into the truck

the car ride consists of you and yoongi continuing to get to know each other a lil more

the conversation flows very smoothly and easily between the two of you and that makes u happy :-))))

you tell him about that one time you thought there was a robber in your house but it turned out to be a squirrel which is moRE confusing because how the hell did the squirrel make it up so high

yoongi tells you about that one time he was staying late at the shop and hE thought there was a robber in the garage but it was just a drunk jungkook tripping over a stack of tires

you ask him about his family and he asks you about yours

you tell him you love ur mom and dad a lot but you’re suPer glad to be living on your own because it gets overwhelming sometimes

yoongi says he has a good relationship with his family too (but they weren’t pleased when he came home for new years and they discovered his tATTOO SLEEVE and his BLEACHED HAIR)

he tells you about his lil dog named holly (who he misses so much!!!!!) and you tell him about your pet turtle walter who lives at home with your parents

you find out that his favourite pizza toppings are pepperonis and pineapples and you fULLY roast him for that disgusting combination

and then he finds out that your favourite pizza toppings are spinach leaves, fire-grilled chicken, and caramelised red onions and he’s like okay miss bouGIe do u realise how much more expensive my pizza would be if i asked for fire-grilled chicken  

he listens to hip-hop most of the time but he does have a soft spot for ariana grande and halsey

he bEgs you not to say anything to the boys

he’s not insecure about his masculinity or anything

he just doesn’t want them to bLAST break up w ur boyfriend i’m bored in the shop all day even tho it’s a B O P

“okay, turn into the roundabout here…” you point towards the penthouse buildings once yoongi drives past the gates (u live in a gaTed community u r so bougie!!!!!!!!!)  

“this building? the one with the… marBle fountain?”

“mhm, you got it.” you unbuckle your seatbelt and turn to smile at him “thank you for the ride and the shower.”

“anytime, doll.” yoongi plays along and his right eye drops in a wink

he chews on the inside of his cheek nervously

should he go for it

,.,..,

yeah he’s going to go for it

“hey, by the way-“ he stops you before you can hop out of the truth “the guys and i are hanging out this friday at this club we usually go to... don’t feel pressured to say yes or anything but if you wanna tag along that’d be totally-“

“yEs i would love to!” you blurt out and yoongi pauses and chuckles lightly

omg

yES you definiTEly want to

“okay, i’ll text you the details as soon as i figure out what’s happening.”

“sounds good!!” you shut the door and yoongi rolls the window down

“i’ll see you later then?”

“mhm! by the way - i’m keeping the shirt.”

yoongi snorts and rolls his eyes playfully as he watches you make your way to the entrance

he bites back a smile and leans back against the seat before letting out a breath and turning the truck back on

you really are something

friday can’t come soon enough

oh boy

your bedroom looks like it’s just been hit by a tornado

because it is a mEss

“i have nothing to wear!” you whine to nobody in particular as you stand in the middle of your walk-in closet and look around at the racks and racKs of clothing surrounding you

first you tried a tank top tucked into a pair of jeans and a sensible cardigan but then you remembered riGHt i’m going to a club i’m not going to the LIBRARY

and then you tried this brand new dress from chanel but you decided it was too ~avant-garde~ (u don’t really know what that means but that’s how the lady described it to you when she was selling it to you) for the club

and theN you tried a jumpsuit kinda thing but you’re not going to want to completely strIP down and sit on the toilet butt-ass naked when you have to pee

but u know what

after 2 hours (yes, TWO hours) of going through your closet you think you’ve finally pieced a sensible outfit together

it’s a baby blue slip dress (you bought it to match with beeper and u will shamelessly admit that) and you pair it with these adorable strappy platform sandals and of course a brand new gucci clutch  

hm

you look so cuTe you love this outfit

you kinda look like an early 2000s bratz doll and you’re,.,.,. ObseSsed with that

also

if someone compliments you on your outfit you’re definitely going to hit them with a “oh, this old thing? i just threW it on!”

no one will ever know it took you 120 minutes to pick (1) blue dress

you’re taking this secret to the GRAVE

yoongi offered to pick you up but you told him you’d be fine getting there by yourself

plus you really wanted to go in fashionably late (not tOO late of course) and just knock the socks off of everyone

you fully accept that you are a tiny bit of an attention whore

>:-)

“i think i should’ve picked her up.” yoongi mutters as he takes the last sip of his beer

it’s 9:30 and you’re stiLL not here

he’s checked his phone literally ten times in twenty minutes to make sure that he hasn’t missed any texts or calls or

“i think you’re overthinking this. she’ll get here! maybe there’s traffic.” jimin pats yoongi’s shoulder before returning to his conversation with hoseok

“and even if she doesn’T come you can still have fun with us!” jungkook points out and yoongi frowns “what??? we’re just as fun as y/n!!”

“we might be just as fun as y/n but yoongi doesn’t wanna make out with you like he does y/n-“

“soRRY you guys my uber dropped me off like three blocks away from here for some reason and i didn’t realise how hard it was walking in platform sandals” yoongi jumps in surprise when you suddenly poP out of nowhere

“this is why i should’ve picked you u-“ yoongi turns his head and finally gets a good look at you

shit you look good

he’s.,,.,. never seen your bAre legs before but he most definitely wants to bury his face in between them!!!!!!

oops

“are you two done checking each other out yet?” taehyung raises a brow and you and yoongi break gazes immediately

yoongi looks up at the little lightbulb hanging from the ceiling and you look towards the bowl of pretzels sitting on the table

namjoon smacks tae’s arm scoldingly

quick change the subject

“have you guys just been sitting here this whole time?” you take a seat next to yoongi and you’re hAPPy to report that he doesn’t move when the side of your thigh presses up against him

you’re used to seeing yoongi in a jumpsuit (which is hot) or like a plain white tee tucked into a pair of jeans (which is aLso hot) but tonight he looks extra EXTRA hot

he’s wearing all bLAck tonight

black t-shirt

black ripped jeans

black bomber jacket

he even smells sexy

he smells like that denim shirt that’s hanging in ur closet

oH and he’s wearing a bandana and for some reason the sight of him in a bandana makes you s w e a t

yoongi leans back and drapes an arm over the back of the booth and you’re vEry tempted to snuggle right into him but unfortunately the two of you are noT at that stage yet

“this is our third bowl of pretzels and our second round of beers, so no, we haven’t just been sitting here this whole time.” jungkook points out smartly and you nod understanDably

he’s such a dweeb

you love it

alright well

apparently the party don’t start til you walk in

you give yoongi’s thigh a couple pats before pointing at the bar “i’m gonna go get us some shots!” you grin excitedly as you slide out of the booth

all of the boys sit in silence until they all decide you’re at a safe distance away from them

“…..she touched your thiGhHhHhhhH” taehyung wiggles his brows and yoongi scoffs and rolls his eyes

“so what?”

“…yo diCK is close to your thiGhHhHhhhH”

“so in a way she indirectly touched your dick” jungkook holds his hand out for a fist bump

yoongi looks at the two of them in an unimpressed manner

“hi, can i get a round of kamikazes please?” you smile politely at the bartender before handing him your card

you gon be honest

you don’t actually know what a kamikaze is

you googled a list of shots on your way here and kamikaze was on that list

there’s also a type of shot called a blowjob but you’re not sure how it’s going to go down if you ask the bartender for a round of blowjobs

“what’s a pretty little thing like you doing at a place like this?” you jump in surprise when someone suddenly appears next to you and you’re about to run away in fear but then you get a better look at this guy

there’s no other way to describe it

this binch looks just as Expensive as you

you recognise that limited edition gold rolex that wink at you under the shoddy lighting

“…i could say the same for you” you raise a brow before turning to face the bar again

whY is the bartender taking so long

the guy laughs and tilts his head back a little before leaning forward and offering you a smirk “i’m seokjin. and you are?”

“not interested.” you clap back immediately jin raises his hands in defence but doesn’t back off

“feisty, aren’t we?”

“only when we have to be.” you shrug casually

“fair enough.” he hums and drums his fingers against the counter

a beat of silence goes by and you’re surprised he hasn’t made anoTher move

this guy seems harmless enough so you figure that giving him your name won’t be the woRst decision you’ll ever make in your life

plus the bartender is really taking his sweet time with those drinks and you’re getting bored

“i’m y/n.” you stick your hand out and jin’s eyes flicker down to your hand before he takes it graciously and gives you a firm shake

“well, it’s very nice to meet you. are you here by yourself?”

you snort immediately and shake your head “i wouldn’t come here by myself.” the bartender pauses and raises a brow at you and you give him a sheepish smile “no offence.”

if you thought your drinks were taking a long time to be made they’re going to take even lonGer now

good job u goober

“can i at least buy you a drink? maybe you can come over to my booth and we can chit-chat, see where that takes us…”

“or you could just buy me a drink and we can go our separate ways from there.” you grin and jin tilts his head before letting out a small laugh

“is that how you’re going to play it, sweetheart?” the thin gold chain hanging around his neck shimmers slightly as he shifts and leans closer to you

“i pholhd yew i could fit more phretfulz into my mouf fhan yew” jungkook mumbles and a pretzel falls out of his mouth

jimin is crAcking up at the sight of taehyung practically drooling all over himself

namjoon looks disappointed and hoseok looks vEry amused

yoongi glances over at the bar and furrows his brows in confusion when he sees you talking to,.,.., someone you’re obviously very comfortable with if you’re letting him tuck your hair behind your ear like that

whoever this fella is

he’s wearing a crisp button-up tucked into a pair of slacks and he has his sleeves rolled up (and he knows how weak u r for rolled up sleeves because you always get really moon-eyed when hE rolls his sleeves up)

yoongi clears his throat and shifts in his seat

what was he thinking???  

christ

you guys are from two different worlds

what

was

he

thinking!!!

inviting you here?? and you’RE paying the shots omg he should’ve gone up there to pay for the shots

“miss, your round of kamikazes?”

“be a gentleman, kihyun. why don’t you deliver her shots to her friends for her?” jin points over at yoongi and the others and kihyun nods obediently

“oH oh you really don’t have to- okay never mind”

jin is a nice guy but also u want to go back to ur friends

“so, where were we?”

“you were about to buy me a drink and i was going to accept the drink and then leave” you joke and turn to look over your shoulder juSt in time to see kihyun setting the tray down on the table

okay you know what

one drink isn’t going to hurt

you’ll just enjoy onE drink and then you’ll leave

that way the boTh of you are satisfied..,,.ish

yoongi can’t help but glance over at the bar agaIN and he rolls his eyes when he catches the sight of you throwing your head back in laughter at something

who the hell does this guy think he is anyway

and what kinda guy who dresses like thAt would want to hang out here

no

he’s overthinking it

“hey, your friend told me to bring the shots here. seven kamikazes.”

“OoOohHH yeah lets gET IT” jungkook reaches for a shot as soon as the tray is set down and it goes down his hatch in 0.1 seconds

uh

okay wow

obviously you’re not interested in hanging out with them anymore because you’re stiLL with that guy at the var aND you got the bartender to deliver the shots over so you could kEEP talking to mr. perfect over there

“ooh, these are good!!”

“veRy citrusy”

“are we sure there’s even alcohol in this because it kinda just tastes like orange juice”

“you think we can order more?”

yoongi’s shot is the only one left untouched

jungkook reaches over to tap his shoulder

“hyung, you gonna take a shot?”

yoongi clenches his jaw and reaches over blindly for the shot glass

he tilts his head back and swallows it before setting the glass down firmly

“jEez it wasn’t like i was going to take it or anything” jungkook mutters under his breath

whAtever

yoongi wipes his mouth with the back of his hand

you’re allowed to flirt with whoever you’d like

it’s not like you guys have a thing or anything

you even told him you didn’t want him to come and pick you up so obviously you’ve established that this is a friendship and nothing more

it’s fine

yeah

you guys don’t have a thing

which means hE can flirt with whoever he’d like as well

“anywaYs you’re very nice, jin, but i don’t want you to get the wrong idea or anything…” you smile sheepishly and scratch the back of your neck

you don’t want to tell this complete stranGer about the ins and outs of your will-they-won’t-they relationship with yoongi but you are vEry much tipsy and tipsy y/n just does not have a filter whatsoever “i’m here with yoongi!!!!!!” you clear your throat and gesture towards where the boys are

that strawberry margarita was really good

you could probably drink like twelveteen more of those  

jin glances over your shoulder and raises a peRfect brow (you need to ask him where he gets his brows done because woW)

“which one is this yoongi?” he looks back at you

uh

you weren’t expecting to be quEstioned like this

“uh, he’s the one with the-“ you turn to glance over your shoulder

huh

yoongi isn’t at the table

“well he’s around here someWhere he’s wearing a bandana and he has a tattoo sleeve you know he’s reALLy not that hard to spot-“

“oh! i see him!” you perk up immediately and try to follow jin’s line of sight “you mean the one dancing with my friend?”

wait what

“your friend? where’s your friend-“ the moment your eyes land on yoongi and jin’s friend you feel every single droplet of blood draining from your face

oh boy

yep

that’s yoongi alright

she has a hand tangled up in his hair while the other is running down his chest

he leans down as she says something in his ear and you see him laugh

the two of them continue to sway to the beat and you feel sick to your stomach when you notice her push yoongi’s hand down from her waist to her bum

you immediately turn back to face jin and you feel your cheeks heat up in embarrassment

u just told this guY that you were here with another guY only to find out that the guy that you came with looks like he’s having a greAt time with someone else  

yikes

“for the record - i would never do that to you.” he asks “chivalry is hard to find nowadays, no?”

you swallow thickly and try to snap yourself out of it

it’s not a big deal

yoongi can do whatever he wants

it’s not like he’s showing romantic interest in you just because he invited you to hang out with him

you’re just one of the bros

“say- how about you and your friends join my friends and i in the vip room? the more, the merrier!” jin nods in acknowledgement as the bartender sets a tray of shots down on the counter for him

“uh, maybe! maybe. thank you for the drink, by the way.” you smile politely and watch as he heads towards the velvet door with a gold VIP label on it

how faNcy  

you weren’t going to mention anything to the guys but they asked you what took you so long and the moment the phrase ‘vip section’ slips out of your mouth all the boys immEdiately slide out of the booth and head to said section

you and jimin bumped into yoongi on the dance floor on the way there and you kinda just.,.., awkwardly trailed behind him and his new gal pal as aLL of you made your way over there

anyways

now you’re here

in this truly unfortunate situation

and you are praying to all the gods to just make a black hole appear in the ground and swallow you up

first of all

you didn’t know how Big this room was

and you didn’t know that one person (jin) could have so many frienDS

because you are sitting in a circle with probabLy like twenty-ish (or more) other people (including the boys of course)

the point is you want to be literaLLy anywhere else BUT here right now

“i’m assuming everybody knows the rules of the game-“ jin sets the empty bottle of beer in the centre of the circle and you feel your palms starting to sweat because heLLO you don’T know the rules of the game

also you don’t know haLF these people

a couple of the girls introduced themselves to you but you have horrible memory so their names went into one ear and riGht out the other in like 0.1 seconds

“maybe you should, like, go over the rules one more time to… y’know, to refresh our memories!” you clear your throat and feel your cheeks heat up when you catch jennie snickering

“okay, well… you spin the bottle, and whoever the bottle points at, you have to kiss them for ten seconds.”

“it’s pretty self-explanatory.” one of the other girls mutter

you take your bottom lip in between your teeth nervously “what happens if you don’T wanna kiss that person?”

“then you have to take off an article of clothing.”

wait what

t-that doesn’t sound like regular spin the bottle

thaT’s not how they do in the movies!!!!! everyone’s clothes stay ON in the movies!!!!!  

and then you realise

you oNLY have a dress on

you don’t have a cardigan or a jacket or anything

so if you don’t wanna kiss anybody you’re going to have to take your dress off

in front of all these people!!!!!!!!!!

can i get a thank u nEXT

“um, i have another question!” your hand shoots up into the air “what if instead of taking a piece of clothing off you take a shot instead?”

“ah, that’s a good idea! if you don’t want to kiss your person, then you take a shot aND you take a piece of clothing off!” jin claps his hands together “good thinking, y/n!”

WAIT WHAT

nO you would like to retrACT your statement omg

so

you can safely say that this is one of the WORST experiences in your life

it’s about twenty minutes into the game

they actually changed the rules again so now you take a shot regardless of if you want to kiss your person or not

needless to say everybody is pretty hammered right now

except you of course

you’re like KindA tipsy

like giggly tipsy!!!! jin just keeps ordering margaritas for you and it would be ruDE of you to reject them

but you haven’t taken any shots yet

because you are one of the only people who hasn’t gotten a chance to spin the bottle yet (thank god)

you also are one of the only people who the bottle hasn’t landed on yet (which is also a thank goD)

“hey”

you turn to look at jin and a smile twitches at your lips when he hiccups

his cheeks are rosy and he’s glowing a bit

loVe that for him

“what do yoU want” you tease

“is there a mirror in your pants?”

“i’m not wearing pants.” you point out and gesture to your dress

“yah- can you just play along??” jin scoffs and pinches your arm

“okAy okay fine go on”

“-because i can seE myself in them” he beams proudly

you snort and roll your eyes playfully before whacking his bicep as he bursts into squeaKy giggles

“you think you’re funny?” you tease and jin nudges his elbow against yours

“you don’t think i’m funny??”

“i absolutely don’t think you’re funny”

“oOOh i have another one”

“can’t be any worse that that mirror one”

“the word of the day is legs.”

“is it?”

“let’s say we head back to your place and spread the word.”  he purrs into your ear and you nEARly screech

“jiN!!!!” you gasp and turn to gawk at him “that’s hoRRIBle you FreAK”

yoongi clenches his jaw when he sees you smack jin’s arm as the two of you continue giGGling away at god knows what

whatever he said can’t possibly be thAt funny

“my turn!!!” jennie gets up onto her knees and shuffles towards the bottle

you suddenly stop laughing because oh no it’s jennie’s turn

with a quick fliCk of her wrist she sends the bottle spinning

okay

logically speaking there is a 1/28 chance of it landing on you

but more importantly

logically speaking there is a 1/28 chance of it landing on a certain someone else who shall not be named but it’s pretty obvious who you don’T want it to land on

your nails dig into the meat of your palm as you watch the bottle intently

you don’t get a chance to continue worrying about the logistics of the situation because jin taps your shoulder again

good

you need a distraction anyways

she spun it really violently so it seems like it’s going to take a while to get there lol

“hEy hey hey i’ll give u a nickel if u tickle my pickle”

you snort immediately and shake your head

“i’ll give you a nickel to shuT up” you reach over to flick his forehead “we met like forty minutes ago but i am confident in saying that you only think with your dick”

“in thAt case would you like to blow my mind?”

chRIST

it neVER ENDS

yoongi sets his beer down slowly when the he realises the bottle is pointing right at him

he swallows thickly

oh boy

his eyes flicker up and he sees jennie looking right at him with bEdroOm eyes

and then he hears you and jin craCking up and he turns his head to look at you guys

…..,.,,.,.

what if jin takes you home tonight

what if jin takes you home tonight

well

FINe

if jin takes you home tonight then he’s allowed to take jennie home tonight

yoongi’s eyes flicker back to jennie and he gestures towards himself before leaning back against one palm “get over here.”

“c’mon now, that one was really good!”

“if you ever approach someone with that line you’re going to get slapped-“ you immediately lose your train of thought when you turn your head to see jennie and yoongi fuLLy going at it

“and that’s 10 seconds!”

yoongi’s the first to pull away and he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand

he ain’t gon lie

that was kind of slobbery

her lip gloss is also sickLY sweet

“y/n, you’re the only one who hasn’t spun yet! why don’t you give it a try?” jin nudges your side and you snap out of it and look at the bottle “i know yoongi’s technically supposed to be spinning now but we should give you a shot at it before someone goes twice.”

“oh, i don’t- um, i don’t… i think i might just skip my turn.” you smile nervously

your heart is haMMering away in your chest

there are a million and one thoughts running through your mind right now and the amount of alcohol that’s flowing through your veins probably isn’t helping to calm you down

u just

u really liked yoongi :-(

you’ve had so much fun spending time with him for the past couple of weeks

but obviously you aren’t his type

which is okay! that’s fine

everything’s fine

also

you don’t want to play this game because you don’t want your first kiss to be because of spIN the bottle

“c’mon, y/n. we aren’t getting any younger here, girl!”

“o-okay! okay, i’m- i’ll spin.” you clear your throat before leaning over and grasping the bottle

you give it a good agGREssive spin and watch as it goes round and round and round and round

oh boy

this sucks

you thought he liked u back

like you really REALLy thought he liked you back

he’s just been so nice and sweet to you!!!!!!

well to be fair he kind of has to be nice and sweet to you because you are paying him to fix your verY expensive car

he probably just wanted a faT tip that’s why he’s been so kind

and maybe he only invited you here tonight because you bought lunch for him

also you literally have no experience with situations like this so you can’t assume that he likEs you just because you like him

whatever

you should go for someone like jungkook who’s closer to you in age

well thEre you go again assuming that someone who obviously doesn’t like you likes you

“hey, look at that! it’s your lucky day, y/n!”

you snap out of it aGAIN and look down at the bottle that’s pointing right at

jin

you turn your head to look at him and he immediately flashes you his oh-so-charming smile “get ready for the best 10 seconds of your life, darling”

you immEdiately start to panic when jin reaches up to cup the side of your jaw and your fingers wrap around his wrist tightly

okay

yeah

just go with it

kiss him

he’s a nice guy!!!!! he bought manY drinks for you, he invited you and your friends to his vip room, he’s nice!!!!!

you’re going to give this complete sTRanger your first kiss even though you would much rather give it to yoongi

jin has nice lips though so maybe you can just preTEnd it’s yoo-

“waIT WAIt waIT-“ jin jolts in surprise before his eyes pop open and he blinks at you “i- my lips are chapped.”  

his eyes flicker down to your lips and you feel your cheeks flush when his thumb brushes over your bottom lip “they feel awfully smooth to me.”

he starts leaning in again

and in the corner of your eye you see yoongi leaning in and whispering something into jennie’s ear

she places her hand on his knee and starts sliding it up his thigh

and you don’t know what happens

but you snAp

“what the hell is wrong with you??”

y i k e s

jin’s eyes pop open and he’s about to retaliate but he realises you’re not even looking at him

you’re looking at yoongi

yoongi furrows his brows before scoffing and look around the circle “is this part of the game?” he jokes and there’s like a scAtter of nervous laughter

“i’m-“ you look around the circle as well and swallow thickly

ok

maybe u just embarrassed urself a little bit by your outburst

a couple people are avoiding eye contact with you

namjoon presses his lips together and looks down when you look at him

hoseok is giving you a pity-infused smile

and jungkook

jungkook fell asleep on one of the girls

“i’m- uh, i should go.” you mutter and get up off the ground “soRRy about that, you guys!” you clear your throat and gesture to the bottle “someone else can take my turn!”

“i’ll spin!” jin claps his hands together when a beat of silence goes by “if ya can’t take the heat, get out of the kitchen!” he jokes

another round of scattered laughter

at least there’s less awKward tension

you can feel how hot your face is from under your makeup

at least it’s full coverage so no one will ever be able to tell that your face is on FIRE

the chilly air sobers you up a little more as you push the door open

you let out a breath and pull your phone out to call an uber

you just want to go home

wipe all this makeup off

wash your hair

maybe you’ll take a bubble bath

do a face mask

“y/n, wait-“ the momeNT you hear yoongi’s voice all hell breaks loose once again

you are AN G RY

“let gO of me-!” you shove yoongi’s hand off your wrist before whipping around and adjusting your purse on your shoulder with a huff

yoongi immediately raises his hands in defence before he furrows his brows at you “what the hell was that all about?? are you ok-“

“is this just a game to you??”

yoongi blinks at you before scratching the back of his neck

“is… is the game… just a game to me?”

“no i’m not talking about the stUpid game yoongi i’m talking about-“ you pause because you don’t really know hoW to word this without sounding like an obsessive maniac “i don’t understand you! i thought you- you’re just sO fruSTRATING”

yoongi scoffs immEdiately and crosses his arms

“i don’t think you’re allowed to say that when you were the one flirting with jin like craZy”

“i wasn’t- i wasn’t flirting with him!”

“you totALLy were! someone would have to be blind if they thought you weren’t flirting with him!”

“you were the one who literally mADE out with someone else!!!”

“y/n, it was a game-“

“i just don’t think it’s fair that yOU were the one who invited me to this hole in the wall and then yOU go off and start making out with someone else and dancing and-“

“well you know what i am so so sorry for taking you to this grubby hole in the wall!” yoongi snaps and you shut up immediately “you know what, you’re right, i think it’d be better if you just left.”

“i think it’d be better if we just nEver saw each other again!” you snap and cross your arms “we’re compLETE opposites-“

“sounds good to me!!! we’re from two diFFerent worlds so you should heAd back to the land of elitists because i- oh! should i hail a cab for you or is that too gross and poor for little miss spoilt brat??” yoongi’s tone is sO patronising and you’re (this) close to slapping him across the face “what’s the matter?? something doesn’t go your way so the firSt thing you do is sTorm out like a child????”

“excuse me?!” you hiss and shove at his chest “you’re an asshole. you’re an asshole!”

you already feel angry tears prickling at your eyes as you whip around

“fuck, y/n, wait-!”

all you know is that you don’t ever want to see min yoongi ever again and you’d be happy to get in your car and run him over and over and over and ovER agAIN

and suddenly you’re reminded that you don’t have a car to run him over with because your car is in hIS damn SHOP

“y/n, i didn’t mean-“

somehow you manage to cross the street without tripping over yourself and you pick up the pace to get as far away from yoongi as possible

god

what a night

you should’ve stayed home

the moment you step into the penthouse everything just seems to go wrong

your keys fall the ground with a clatter

you nearly trIp and fall flat on your face as you undo your sandals

you toss your clutch onto the couch but it bounces off the pillows and falls to the ground

you head straight to your bedroom and the second you throw yourself onto the bed you burst into tears

you hate everything

everything sucks

min yoongi espeCially sucks

you hate that he,.,.,. he patronised and belittled you like that

you haTe that he made all those comments about you being a spoilt brat because everyone who’s ever been mean to you have made those exact comments and you never thought yoongi would be one of those people

okay look

you don’t want to be one of those rich people but you can’t help it!!!! yes you’ve always had more of a comfortable lifestyle (which is completely out of your control like wtf you didn’t chOOSe to be born into a well-off family) but like.,., at the same time it’s isolated you

throughout elementary school and high school you know for a fact you were invited to all those parties and dinners only because people knew that you’d be the one who’d get them the most expensive presents (you got this one girl a purse from louis vuitton one year and the next year when you got her a bag of gummy bears ((because she liKED guMMY BEARs)) she literally threw them into the bin and you were like??? and then when you apologised and gave her a necklace from tiffany’s she immediately forgave you and you did noT like that vibe) or you’d be the one who was always like “i’ll get the bill!!!! no worries!!!!!!”

and now we’re back to square 1

completely alone

because you’ll never be anything more than little miss spoilt brat who maxes out daddy’s credit card and pouts when she doesn’t get what she wants  

oh my god

you’re going to be become one of those rich old ladies who don’t have anybody to share their huGe mansions with

“hyung? you alright?” jungkook asks meekly

as soon as yoongi ran out after you all of the boys did the same

of course they kept their distance but they heard evErything from your guys’ conversation

and now yoongi’s just standing by the truck

namjoon clears his throat before jingling the keys in his fingers (they fell out of yoongi’s pocket when he ran out) “i’ll drive because i only took that one shot and i’m pretty sure it’s worn off-“

all of a sudden yoongi swINgs his fist and drives it sTraight into the side mirror

hoseok yelps in surprise and jimin immediately slaps a hand over his mouth

the mirror immediately cracks and shatters into pieces before splintering onto the ground

yoongi’s panting slightly as he inspects the damage on boTh the mirror and his fist

droplets of blood splatter onto the floor among the pieces of glass

he clenches his fist and watches as crimson continues to ooze out of the fresh wound

yoongi opens the door and hops into the truck before slamming the door shut

everyone else kinda looks at each other

poor jungkook has gone has white as a sheet of paper because he gets vEry queasy over the sight of blood

“he bent the mirror.” tae squeaks out

he did noT know yoongi was capable of causing that much damage

“everyone get into the truck. now.” namjoon hisses lowly and everyone scuRries to get in

the shards of glass crunch underneath the tires as namjoon pulls out of the parking spot

yoongi stays silent the entire ride back

he doesn’t flinch when namjoon tends to his wounds and literally pulls a thin sliver of glass out from his knuckles

it sTings and burns like hell but it doesn’t show on his face

it’s fine

yoongi knows he deserves the pain.

it has officially been twelve days since the blowout

and yoongi thinks he’s losing his mind

he can’t stop thinking about you

he can’t stop thinking about how your eyes glazed over and your bottom lip trembled

how your voice wavered as you shoved at his chest and called him an asshole

it doesn’t matter

you two would’ve never worked out anyway so maybe this fight was for the best

he just won’T come in to work the day you come and pick your car up

yeah! it doesn’t matter at all

all you are is an entitled trust fund baby who whines when she doesn’t get what she wants and when you dO get what you want it’s simply not enough

but oh

yoongi knows he’s just lying through his teeth when he says that

you’re noT just this one-dimensional princess

there’s more to you than just that

there’s so much more to you

you’re so kindhearted and generous

hE was the one who fucked up

hE was the one who got weirdly insecure and completely lashed out on you

hE was the one who made out with that jennie girl in front of you knowIng that there was something between the two of you even though it had never been established

he knEW that you liked him yet he still pulled all that shit

why?????? WHY?????

anyways

he hasn’t made a move to text or call you because he knows you’re not going to respond to him

he did draft out this long long text message but he ended up deleting it

and he was going to leave a voicemail but it was just really awkward and also he ran out of time

it kept beeping on him before he could finish his speech

he knows he’s the last person you want to hear from right now

yoongi looks down at his wrapped up knuckles and slowly makes a fist

oW

why couldn’t he have punched a piLLOW

yoongi swivels around in his chair when he hears a gentle knock on the door

“what do you want?” he gets straIght to the point and jimin raises a brow before deciding it’s okay to let himself in

“uh, i just need you to sign off on this order.” he places the clipboard on the desk

yoongi’s pen glides over the dotted line quickly and he clicks it before shoving it back into the pen holder

“cool, thanks.” jimin nods and picks the clipboard back up

before he can make it to the door yoongi speaks up again

“can i ask you something?”

jimin turns to glance over his shoulder before he turns all the way so he can face yoongi

he has a feeling he knows where this is going

“you guys heard everything, didn’t you?”

“heard wha-“

“you know what i’m talking about.” yoongi says gently

jimin knows it’s best noT to beat around the bush

after all he doesn’t want to end up like that side mirror

lol

.,,.,too soon?

“um, yes. yes, we heard everything. we didn’t mean to, though, we just ran out because-“

“on a scale from 1 to 10 how badly did i fuck it up with y/n?”

god damnit

he should’ve gotten jungkook to come in here and ask yoongi to sign the sheet

jimin immediately presses his lips together and avoids yoongi’s gaze “with all due respect hyung i really don’t think it’s any of my business-“

“i just need you to be honest with me because i have no idea what to do and i-“

“like a 20. like a colossal 20.” jimin blurts out and offers him a shrug when yoongi stares at him in shoCK

twenty????? TWENTY OUT OF TEN

yoongi lets out a groan and leans back against his chair and he stares at the ceiling fan whirring around and around

he presses the heels of his hands into his eyes and curses to himself

“do you like her?”

“of course i like her, you moron.” yoongi scoffs and shoots him a dirty look

“hey you know what i don’t have to help you if i don’t want to.” jimin starts to get up and yoongi reaches out to grab onto his wrist

he lets out a sigh “i’m… i’m sorry. i know you’re just trying to help, i’m just kiNDa all over the place right now”

jimin plops back down on the seat

“so you like her?”

“as we’ve established already yeS i do like her”

“well why don’t you just tell her that?”

“i don’t… i can’t.” yoongi exasperates and tilts his head back before folding his hands on his stomach

“what do you mean?? it’s obvious she likes you back. or she at least likeD you back. i’m not sure about it with the present situation.”

yoongi gives him a warning look

“i’m not… i’m not for people like her, y’know?”

jimin snorts and leans back against the chair “what’s that supposed to mean? are you from mars? are you not human?”

“not like thAt! she’s supposed to be with like… i don’t know, a businessman or a manager or-“

“you’re a businessman aNd a manager-“

“of a car repair shop, jimin. not like some biG shot car repair shop either.”

“you’re overthinking this big time. i’m not going to sit here and deliver a whole speech about you need to follow your heart and all that bullshit - at the end of the day, y/n obviously likes you for you. so get your head out of your ass and talk to her before it’s too late.”

“what if it’s already too late?”

“trust me, it’s not. knowing y/n she probably would’ve broken into the shop in the middle of the night to get her car back if she never wanted to see you again.”

yoongi can’t help but laugh at the sight of you picking a lock with like a gucci hairpin or something

“…can i clock out early because i helped you?”

“absolutely not.”

you spoon a bite of coco puffs into your mouth and chew slowly

yuck

room temperature cereal is not pleasant

mushy cereal is not pleasant either

would not recommend

0/10

you toss the bowl into the sink carelessly and winCe at the loud clank

oops

you haven’t been up to a lot lately in the past twelve days

you go to class

you go home

you do work

you turn netflix on

you eat dinner

you take a shower

you go to bed

time seems to have meshed together nowadays

you just feel so

..,drained

your phone buzzes on the counter and your heart drops to your stomach when you see the contact name

‘min mechanics’

o no

you’re not ready

you don’t want to talk to him

your finger hovers over the decline button but it seems that your finger has a mind of its own because-

“oh shit-“ you pick the phone up as soon as you hit the accept button “hello?” you clear your throat

“y/n? hey! it’s namjoon.” you can’t help but let out a breath of relief because if it was yoongi who called you would not have known how to react

“joon, what’s up?”

“beeper is ready for you!! we polished him up and everything! you can come pick him up whenever you’d like.”

“…you can’t drive him to my place or anything?”

you hear namjoon let out a sigh from the other end of the phone

“i could do that for you… but i think you and yoongi have some things to talk about.”

“i don’t want to talk to him.” you murmur and namjoon hEars the pout in your voice

“i know you don’t, but you know you need to talk to him. it’s definitely going to be awkward but-”

“i don’t even think he wants me around, namjoon. he said it himself, we’re from two different worlds!” you huff and flop down on your bed

“obviously it’s none of my business but i just… yoongi’s happier when you’re around, y’know? and i know for a fact that he makes you just as happy - it’s pretty obvious you two are… into each other, and i just think it’d suck if you let this bump in the road ruin your relationship with him… he’s stubborn, i know…”

“he said a lot of hurtful things, joon.” you feel your eyes starting to water as you’re forCed to relive the memory “like, a lot of hurtful things.”

“i know he did. i- i don’t know what to say about that but you have to believe me when i say yoongi is not that kind of person. just… please come?”

well

it looks like you don’t have much of a choice because you do need your car back

“…i’ll swing by later, joon.”

you heard namjoon let out a breath of relief “that’s great, y/n, that’s so great. i’ll see you later!”

yes

you will noT regret this

plus you do want to clear the air with yoongi even though you hate confrontation

anD you want to apologise because it wasn’t right for you to freak out like that when he was with that other girl

you guys hadn’t established any kind of relationship so it simply didn’t make sense for you to be all bOO-hooey and-

ooH or you could just get a new car so you never have to see him again

maybe you’ll move to greece

live on a vineyard

start your own wine-making business

enjoy fresh pita and hummus and kalamata olives everyday

noPE

don’t do that

don’t throw money at your problems and expect them to go away (even though you can definitely afford to move to greece)

you are noT that cowardly person anymore

“miss? uh, we’re here.” you look out the window and feel your heart starting to race when you see that familiar sign

min mechanics

ok

it’ll be fine

just go in

find namjoon

find beeper

and get the heCk out of here

it was a mistake to wear your boots today because you are doing the complete OPPOSITE of avoiding attention

click clack click clack clickclackclickclackclickclackclickclack

“hey guys” you smile shyly when you pass by the boys

they’re all working together on a convertible and they all look shoCked that you actually came  

aLL the boys are here

which has to mean that yoongi’s around here somewhere

o god

you’re like three seconds away from getting a heart attack

okay nope

just focus

you push the door open and the bell tinkles

“joon,” you are sO relieved to see namjoon sitting behind the counter “sorry i took so long to get here.”

the door to yoongi’s office is closed

thank god

maybe he didn’t come in today

“it’s all good!” namjoon chirps and pulls out a couple sheets of paper from a file before getting up and placing them on the counter ”how have you been? uh, sign here, and here.”

“i’ve been good! a little busy with studying for finals and all that but either than that i’ve been good.” you nod and click the pen “how about you?”

“i’ve been doing well. i’ve been watching these nature documentaries on netflix-“

“-planet earth?” your hand pauses on the sheet and for the firSt time in twelve days you flash a genuine smile

“planet earth!” namjoon laughs lightly “it’s a great series, i love it.”

it’s a good thing you and namjoon have good small-talking skills otherwise it would just be compLETE silence right now

“okay, there you go.” you set the pen down and namjoon takes the sheets from you and double-checks that you signed everything

“i’ll go and get beeper ready for you! just wait here, i’ll be riGht back.”

“wait but-“ before you know it namjoon walks past you and leaves you aloNE in the office and you start chewing on your bottom lip nervously

maybe you can go hide in the washroom til namjoon comes back

yep

sounds like a good plan-

all of a sudden the office door opens and you feel your heart stop

frICK

“hey namjoon have you seen the- …oh, uh…“

“hi.”

“hey.”

a beat of awkward silence goes by

the tension is sO thick and you’ve never been so uncomfortable in your entire life

“i was just- sorry, i was looking for namjoon.”

“oh, he, um, he’s getting bee- my car, he’s getting my car for me.” you clear your throat and gesture towards the front door

“cool, cool.” yoongi slaps a hand against the frame of the door gently and nods

christ this is awkward

what happened to that small-talking skill girL

“alright, y/n! he’s all set and ready to go!” namjoon sticks his head in and he falters when he registers what’s going on

his eyes flicker in between you and yoongi “oh, sorry, was i interrupting-“

“nO no you weren’t! i’m comIng” you move at lightning speed to get as far away from yoongi as possible  

“y/n wait-“ there’s no way in hell yoongi’s going to let you get away agaIN

he’ll find another dang mirror to punch if he lets that happen

namjoon hands him the keys to beeper along with a notepad “you should probably do the final check on the car instead of me”

“yeah, thanks man.” yoongi tucks the notepad into his back pocket before jogging out

“heY jimin did a really good job with the polishing!” you smooth your hands over beeper’s hood “beeper’s blinDing me-“ you turn around and jump in surprise when you see that it’s yoongi standing behind you and not namjoon “….where’s nam-“

“please shut up for like one second.”

ooOOOKAY

noT the greatest opening line!!!!!!!!!!!!

oof

yikes

…,,.yooF

he’s nERVOUS OKAY

he wasn’t expecting to have to deal with this sO quickly

if he’d had known that you were coming today he would’ve prepared some flash cards or something but this is his chance to just be completely real with you and get everything off his chest

“y/n, i’m sorry. really, i am. i’m not very… good with apologies but this is me trying my best.” he clears his throat and he looks like he’s having a hard time collecting everything that he wants to say to you “all the things i said to you… god, i was a complete asshole and you didn’t deserve any of that. i-i didn’t even mean any of that shit i said, y’know? i think i just… i got all weird and insecure because i saw you with jin and i just… it reminded me that we… we’re… i’m… i mean, i’m a mechanic, for crying out loud. i fix cars for a living and he had a damn gold watch that probably costs more than my rent!! i understand if you don’t ever wanna talk to me again, i totally get it, i wouldn’t wanna see me again either after being spoken to like that but i just needed to say sorry to you to let you know that i really, really didn’t mean a word of what i said. you deserve so much better than me.” yoongi shrugs and scratches the back of his neck “i don’t know. it’s stupid. i’m stupid. i don’t-”

“the only difference between you and jin that i really care about is the fact that i don’t like jin, but i… i like you.” you admit shyly and if your face wasn’t red before it certainLy is now “and it doesn’t matter to me that you’re a mechanic, y’know? i’m sorry, too. i said some things that i didn’t mean either… i really appreciated you asking me to hang out with you and the guys and that place wasn’t even that grubby!! i was just being- i don’t know, i think i just mad at you because you.. dId all that with jennie-“

“-which was the worst kiss of my life if that makes you feel any better-“

“i’ll forgive you if you forgive me?” you suggest and yoongi nods enthusiastically

“i will find a way to make it up to you, i swear.”

“also, you’re a moron.”

“wha- well, yeah, i guess i deserve that but-“

“okay now it’s youR turn to shut up for like one second.” you stick your hand up and yoongi clams up immediately “you’re a moron for worrying that i was going to pick jin over you just because he’s a millionaire-“

“he’s a millionaire-!”

“because i could give leSS of a shit about that! you’re really sweet and kind and i think you’re awfully funny aNd not to mention you’re pretty easy on the eyes-“ okay y/n reel it back a bit lmao “a-anyways yeah that’s- look the point is you shouldn’t be insecure over something as silly as your job..,,. in faCt i think the whole mechanic thing is actually kinda sexy”

oKAY that’s noT reeling it back at ALL BUT GREAT GOD JO B you said what you wanted to say

“also…what the hell happened to your hand?”

oh right

yoongi glances down at his wrapped up hand

should he tell you that he punched a side mirror and had a shard of glass stuck in his knuckles

“eh, don’t worry about it. it was just an accident.” he waves it off

hm

you’ll find out soOner or later

“so-“ yoongi clears his throat “…you like me or you like-like me?” yoongi raises a brow and offers you a cocky smirk and you immediately scoff in response and cross your arms before looking in the other direction

“don’t flatter yourself i was just being nice”

“don’t lie to me now” yoongi steps closer to you and hooks a finger under your chin before turning your head so that you’re facing him “you got anything you wanna ask me?”

your eyes immediately widen

well

yes

you have a question for him of course you have a question for him

hoW do you even approach a situation like this do you just bluRt it out????

“do you, um, do you…” you puff your cheeks out in frustration and immediately divert your gaze to the ground

you start toeing at the ground nervously (which is something you haven’t done since you were like 12) while your fingers tug at the hem of your blouse

“like… i-i just… do you… do you like me? …back? do you like me back?” you finAlly get it out of your system and you feel like your entire face is on fire “it’s just… sometimes i get the feeling that you like me and other times i get the feeling that you’re just being friendly and i’ve never really, y’know, i don’t have a lot of experience with this kinda stuff so i just need you to tell me straight up if you like me back or if i’m just being delusional…”

“what do you mean by not having a lot of experience with ‘this kinda stuff’? you mean going out and getting something you want by yourself?” yoongi teases and your cheeks flush even further

wow

now that you two have forgiven each other it seems like he’s reverteD back to his usual self

yoongi likes this

this is a fun game

obviously you’re used to getting what you want with the snap of your fingers

and yoongi is a firm believer in the idea that in order to get what you want you gotta work hard

you gotta put in the effort!!!!

yeah suRe he knows that you like him just as much as he likes you (and thaT gets him super excited)

but he’s not going to give in to you that easy

no no

if you want him you better shoW him that you want him

“well yes buT also i meant like… boy-related experiences? i dunno” god this is humiliating

you hATE this

if you could turn back time you wouldn’t have brought this shit up in the first place you should’ve just hoPPEd into beeper and nyOOmed out of the garage “i haven’t even had my first kiss yet so like- look just teLL me if you like me back or not because i’m about to lose my-“  

“wait- you’ve never been kissed?” yoongi’s brows furrow in confusion and he tilts his head

how is that possible

how is it possible that you’ve never been kissed

ok well

now he feels a little bad for dragging this whole thing out

and also

he’s never seen you so… insecure? before

you can’t even look him in the eye

“are you kidding me?”

what the heck!!!!!!!!!!!

of course he likes you!!!!!

he’s liked you from day one!! when you walked in with your leather booties and your heart-shaped sunglasses and your little ‘hellooOOOoOo’

he liked you even more when you shoved your clobbered side mirror into his chest and insisted he fix your car right now immediately

and he liked you even even more when jungkook was straight up flexing in front of you but all you were paying attention to was him with your bottom lip tucked in between your teeth and your cheeks all pink and rosy

that was for him

all for him

“well you don’t have to say it like thAt” you grumble and reach up to scratch at the back of your neck “look thiS was stupid just forget i said anythi-“

“i like you back. i definitely like you back.” yoongi admits casually as he scribbles something on his little notepad

“you- oh. okay.”

ok

you didn’t think thiS far ahead

what’s your next move

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

“so what are you gonna do about it?” yoongi tucks his notepad into his pocket and crosses his arms before looking at you expectantly

uHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

he pokes his tongue into his cheek and tilts his head when you continue to stand there and stare at him blankly like a deer in headlights “ah. so you’re not going to do anything about it. alright.” he sighs and turns to head back to the office “i’m just going to bring namjoon back out here and he’ll take care of-“

and before you know it you’re grabbing onto his wrist and yanking him back and-

yoongi feels like his heart is about to explode when you pull him down and press your lips against his

his eyes flutter shut and he places his hands on your hips and gives you a gentle squeeze

your arms are wrapped loosely around his neck and you pull away with flushed cheeks

oh god

u just kissed yoongi

thAt was your first kiss

mission success!!!!!!!!!

“…there, i did something about it” you grumble and puLL your arms back

and then it hits you

oh my god i just kissed yoongi and woW his lips are like supEr soft and he tastes like cherry which makes sense because he loves those lollipops-

“you’re so cute.” yoongi laughs and nudges you back til you’re sitting on beeper’s hood

you’re pretty sure you’re not supposed to be sitting on beeper

“what are you doing? i-“

you know what you could care leSS about beeper because yoongi’s kiSsing you!!!! again!!!

AGAIN!!!!!!!!!

:~)

you have your fingers curled up in yoongi’s jumpsuit as you kiss him back and you let out a little whimper

yoongi’s thumbs circle your kneecaps before they drag a cheEky trail up the inside of your thighs

he squeezes your thighs and encourages you to open them wide enough so that he can stand in between them

“you good?” he mutters against your lips and you nod quickly and pull him closer

goD you’re so CUTE

he’s so soft for you it’s insane

he pulls your hand away from his jumpsuit and brings it up so that you can wrap your fingers around the nape of his neck

you immediately slide your hand up and tangle your fingers into his soft locks “there you go”

yoongi pulls away from you and revels in the small whimper that you let out

god

aren’t you a vision

your lips are swollen and glossy and your eyes are all blown out and your cheeks are warm and rosy

all that just from a little bit of kissing

“why’d you stop?” you pout and tug at his wrist

“you’d pass out if i continued.” he smirks and tucks a strand of hair behind your ear “and it appears we have an audience, don’t we?” he gets a little louder towards the end of his question and you immediately twist around to look behind you

sure enouGH the boys are all crouched behind a truck staring at the two of you like a bunch of PERVS

they immediately break off and pretend like they weren’t just watching you guys maKe out with each other

jungkook and taehyung bump into each other in their rush to head back to their stations and you snort at the sight

you turn back to face yoongi

“it was probably a good thing we were interrupted” yoongi leans down and gives you another quick kiss before helping you off the hood of the car

“what makes you say that?”

“i was fully ready to go down on you on top of-“

“bEEPER??” you gasp in mock horror and slap your hands over the top of beeper’s hood “you were going to defile me on top of my own car??”

“i mean…” yoongi shrugs before nodding

take you over the hood of your car?

heck yeah he would

he’d take you over the hood of anY car

“don’t listen to him beeper,.,.,. i’d neVer do that to you…”

if yoongi didn’t know any better it’d probably be safe to say that you might be a little tOo in love with beeper

yoongi is a busy man

he has a lot of cars he has to patch up and a lot of parts he has to put together

but uh

making out with u in the driver’s seat of his truck is a much better way to pass the time

he’ll just get the others to take care of the parts for him later

“u know i’m supposed to be replacing a muffler right now…” yoongi lifts his face and brushes his lips against yours teasingly

you can’t help but grin when you pull away slightly and yoongi squeezes your waist in warning

“u know that sounds like a you problem” your nose nudges against his and yoongi tilts his head upwards to kiss you again

since the two of you made up and forgave each other you’ve been visiting the shop moRe than three to four times a week

you practically live at the shop now

and yoongi doesn’t know if that’s a good or a bad thing

on one hand he likes having you around and he likes getting to kiss u whenever he wants

but on the other hand

it’s vEry distracting having you around and getting to kiss u whenever he wants because he aLways wants to kiss you

another bAd thing

whenever he kisses you the others get all oOoOooohHHhHhhh and yoongi is always so tempted to hurl a wrench at all of them

anyways

yoongi’s on his lunch break (that ended twenty minutes ago) and he decided to sneak you into his truck that’s parked in the back alley

his lips move with yours slowly and he revels in the little whimper that leaves you when he nips at your bottom lip

you’re acting extra cute for somE reason

and you look extra cute too

you’re wearing a pretty floral romper paired with your faVourite boots and once again you will never admit to anybody that it took you an hour and a half (you’re getting better) to throw it on

you decide that you’re going to be bold today and you find your hands slowly sliding down yoongi’s chest til they reach the buckle of his belt

yoongi reaches down quickly and wraps his slim fingers around your wrist before offering you a smirk and a tilt of his head “someone’s a little eager, no?”

“don’t you want me?” you push your bottom lip out in a pout and yoongi leans in to give you a lil peck

“course i do.” he chuckles lowly before raising a brow “but how about we start off with something more mild, hm?” he tucks a strand of hair behind your ear before his fingers glide down your jaw and he hooks one under your chin

“like what?” you lean down a little and nip at his fingers playfully and yoongi has never felt more fuckiGn endeared in his life

“do you trust me?”

“course i do.” you drape your arms around his shoulders

“alright, let’s just get you settled right here…” he lifts you up off his lap and onto his right leg instead

his.,., thigh?

you separate your legs so each knee settles on the leather seat on either side of his clothed thigh

ur not..,,.s ure what’s going on right now

but it’s once you get comfortable that you begin to feel the friction

“now what do i- oH-“ you gasp noisily when yoongi’s leg presses upwards and suddenly you spaSm a bit of out of surprise  

tingles shoot up your spine and your fingers twitch slightly on yoongi’s chest

“that feel good?”

“i- i’m not sure yet.” you blink down at yoongi’s thigh and he can’t help but laugh

“need me to help?”

“that would be ideal, yes.”

“well, it’s pretty easy. you just-“ he places his hands on your waist and pushes you back and imMediately you feel another spark of pleasure “and then you come this way,” he pulls you back and flexes his thigh underneath you and you let out a little hiccup

how..,,.intriguing

eventually you get the hang of things

you’re kinda doing it on your own but yoongi’s still guiding you back and forth a little

“that’s it, doll, just like that,” yoongi breathes out, his grip tightening on your waist as he helps you ride his leg

he leans back against the seat and watches you with hooded eyes as you continue to get yourself off on his thigh

your romper and your panties are botH very thin so you can just feel the rough fabric of yoongi’s jeans rubbing up against you

you’re not going too hard but you’re not going too soft either

yoongi swallows thickly because now he has a pretty good picture of what you’d look like riding his c-

“christ-“ you gasp as yoongi raises his leg and pushes riGht up into you as he leans in and attaches his mouth to your neck

“now does it feel good?” he murmurs against you and you gasp and wrap your fingers around the nape of his neck

you can’t even describe how amazing this feels and all your thoughts are just white noise because holy shit this feels so good

you nod quickly and let out a whimper when you feel another wave of pleasure tremor through your body

god

you’re so soft n warm

and so submissive

“yoongi, please...” you don’t even know what you’re pleading for here but that’s all that’s able to come out of your mouth

he looks down and groans quietly when he notices the damp patch on his jeans

“oh,” yoongi coos mockingly, “you sweet thing, you... i wanna wreck you.”

you let out a whine and press your forehead against his shoulder as you continue grinding down on his thigh

your desperation pulls a low moan from yoongi’s throat and he shifts underneath you

“there you go, baby… such a good girl…”

look

you’re not entirely sure what happened here

but somehow you shifted from yoongi’s thigh to yoongi’s crotch

and yoongi just wanted to make this about you so he also doesn’t know how this happened but boY is he glad it happened

you’re literally going to make him cream his pants like a overly-hormonal 14 year old boy and he hasn’t done that in a long loNG TIME but you know what he does noT mind

“ah, fuck-“ yoongi growls and clenches his jaw as his calloused fingers dig into your supple flesh as you continue grinding down on him

you know how yoongi mentioned earlier he had a rough idea of what you’d look like riding him

well now he has a really reALLY clear idea of what you’d look like riding him

he can tell you’re close by the way your breathing has gotten heavier and your cheeks have become more flushed

and he is definitely going to keep this image of you tucked in his brain for safekeeping

you grow dizzy from pleasure and all of your senses are in ovErdrive and all you can think of is yoongi yoongi yoongi yooNGi

“yoonGi, i think i- nngh, yoongi-!“ yoongi’s hand slides up your thigh and curves your waist before he’s gripping at your ass to mould you to him

“look at you, you pretty little thing,” yoongi groans when your hips stutter

you’re driving him absolutely wild  

“lemme hear you, doll, nice n loud for me-“

yoongi is panting because goddamN you really seem like you want him to come before you  

he can bArely keep it together but there’s no way he’s going to come first

he pushes you down on him and lifts his hips up at the same time and you throw your head back with a breathless moan

“i-i- oh, t-that feels really- hAh-“ yoongi sucks a hickey into your skin and continues forcing you down on him

“you have no idea how badly i wanna be inside of you-“ he growls lowly and that does the trick

your toes curl as you’re finaLLY pushed over the edge and you swear you see black dots in your vision, whimpering through your release  

the sound of you gasping his name out and the sight of you trembling above him is what eventually gets to yoongi and he curses to himself as he reaches his high and gasps your own name in return

you feel a warm gush from underneath you and your eyes widen at the wet spot on yoongi’s crotch area

he gives you a few final thrusts before he slides his hands down from your waist so that they rest on the tops of your thighs  

you’re still breathing heavily as you lean down to press your forehead against his

“hi.” yoongi grins and gives u a little kiss and you immediately shy away from him and he feels his heart practically exploDe in his chest

“hi.” you murmur as you keep your gaze on the silver chain around his neck

you reach down to fiddle with it because you don’t know whaT to do now

yoongi reaches up and hooks a finger underneath your chin so that he can finally catch your gaze “you okay?”

you nod shyly and feel your cheeks flush again

“what’s gotten into you, hm?” yoongi teases and leans in to give you another quick kiss “ya can’t get all shy on me now when you were humping me like a rabbit in heat literally thirty seconds ago”

“yOoNgI”

“no but really!! what’s up?”

“i just like u a lot” you admit and your nose scrunches

yoongi grins and feels his heart skip a beat

he reaches up and pinches your nose and you immediately scowl and flick his hand away

“i like you too, doll.”

out of all the mechanic shops in the city

you are vEry happy that beeper decided to run out of gas a minute away from min mechanics

:-)

so

here’s the deal

you asked yoongi to teach you how to change a tire and he was understandably vEry confused because on a list of things that you would never want to do he thinks it’s pretty safe to assume that ‘change a tire’ is on that list

he told you that if you ever got a flat tire all you’d need to do is call him and he’d come to save the day

but you defended your decision saying that you thought it was good for you aND it was an important life skill

because it is!!!! kinda??

for someone who was very adamant on learning how to change a tire you don’t seem to be paying much attention to the actual changing of the tire

“remember? righty tighty, lefty loosie.” yoongi places his hands over yours and helps you turn the wrench

he has a hand placed on your waist as he hovers over you from behind and your mouth tugs up in a subtle smirk when you feel him push himself against your bum (it wasn’t on purpose though because he’s just trying to get that lug nut loose since it’s screwed in real tight)

“righty loosie lefty tighty i got it”

.,.,,.,.,he’s sure you’ll figure it out eventually

“i’ll be back in twenty minutes to check up on you!”

“wait but don’t you wanna stay here to watch-“

“twenty minutes!” you scowl as you watch yoongi head back to the office

what the heCK

your plan has been foiled

you didn’t actually want to have to change aLL the tires!!!!!!!

you nearly fall flat on your ass when you give give the next lug nut a firm yaNk

aLas nothing happens

you don’t know how you’re supposed to change four tires when you can barely handle four lug nuts

aH

maybe if you put some grease around them they’ll be easier to unscrew

wow

you’re a genius

“did you manage to change all the-“

oh

now yoongi knows why you like it when he has smudges of grease all over his hands and his face

you’re gloWing from the exertion of changing tires and your (his) shirt is riding up a bit because you tied it up into a little knot

and he didn’t notice this earlier but your butt looks reALLy good in those jeans

“i did it! i changed every single tire on my own!!!” you wipe your hands on the rag before giving one of the tires a firm kick “look at these bAd boys! c’mon c’mon give me another set of tires to change that was so FUN” you bounce up and down on excitedly

you reach up to wipe your cheek with the back of your hand

“you should take a break and join me in my office!” yoongi takes your hand and starts dragging you towards the office

ya he’s 110% going to go down on you in his office

“or-“ you pull back a little and make him stop walking “oR you can give me another set of tires to change and you can go back to your office?”

yoongi freezes

.,,.what?

“you… you want to change more tires?”

“mhm!!”

“but i just- you don’t wanna go into my office?”

“why would i want to go to your office? there are no tires for me to change there.”

“.,,.go talk to hoseok to see if he has any cars for you to-“

“okAY BYE”

o god

he’s created a monster

ah

finals season

a wonderful time where students are forced to coop themselves up and build fortresses out of their notes and textbooks

you’re not sure how you survived through your finals considering you had like fiVe of them

but the point is

you are DONE

you’re finally done!!!!! you’re FREE

a downside to finals (adding to the other many maNy downsides of finals) is that you forced yourself to stay away from yoongi (and u made him promise not to come see you even tho he really reaLLy wanted to come see you) because you didn’t want to be distracted and min yoongi is a big big distraction

which means you haven’t seen yoongi in nearly two weeks

you’ve texted him and you’ve called him but the phone calls are brief and the text messages are short because time is precious when it comes to exams!!!!

it might not seem like it but you are (surprisingly) vEry studious

yoongi called u a nerd when he face-timed you one night and you were wearing your thick reading glasses because your eyes were starting to give up on you from like 6 hours of staring at your laptop  

“heLLooOOoooo” yoongi perks up when he hears a very familiar voice

he pokes his head up over the raised hood of the car

ah

theRE you are

yoongi grins from ear to ear when he sees you bouncE excitedly into the shop like a little bunny

once you spot him your eyes liGHT UP

“yoongi!!!!!!!!! i missed u!!!!!”

“yeah, baby? you missed me?” yoongi tosses the rag over his shoulder “how much did you miss me?” he teases and wraps an arm around your waist before pulling you closer

“missed you a whole lot.” you breathe out and your eyes flicker down to the lollipop in his mouth

“how were your finals?”

“they were good…” you’re barely paying attention to what yoongi’s saying because all you can focus on is how slick n red yoongi’s lips are

and then

a lightbulb appears above your head

“that’s great! i’ll take you out for ice cream as soon as i-“

you yank the lollipop out of his mouth and yoongi squawks in surprise

and then you’re wrapping your lips around the bright red sweet in a manner that seems far from innocent “what flavour is this?” you hum around the lollipop

yoongi’s mouth goes dry and he swallows thickly “cherry, i-i think. cherry.”

you pull it out from your lips with a pop and stick it back into yoongi’s mouth “i like strawberry more.” you wiggle out of his grip before patting his cheek “alright, i’ll leave you alone now!”

“oh nO you don’t-“ yoongi’s hand darts out and he grabs onto your wrist before tugging you backwards “what makes you think you can get away with doing something like that so easily???”

“because you like me and ur not going to do anyThing about it” you giggle when his fingers dig into your sides playfully

yoongi pauses and raises a brow at you

“…is that a challenge?”

“you tell me” you shrug innocently

you know

you should really learn to keep your mouth shut sometimes

or maybe not

because you’re in a preTty nice situation right now

“you’ll stay nice n quiet for me, won’t you, doll?” yoongi hums against your neck

your skin burns with his touch as he slides his hand over the tops of your thighs before he’s nudging your knees apart so he can settle in comfortably

“no promises.” you giggle softly when you feel his hands sliding underneath your sundress

yoongi pauses all of a sudden and you’re abOUt to retract your statement but then-

“gimme a sec. i’ll be back.”

o

ok

you hear him leave the room and close the door behind him and you start swinging your legs back n forth

and then you stop

oh god

you hope he’s not like.,.,,. puniShing you or anything

he’s not mean enough to leave you high and dry like this right

.,,.,.,.right

yoongi shuts the door behind him as he comes back in

he’s hiding something behind his back

“whatcha got there?”

he takes your chin in between his pointer finger and his thumb and then he taps your bottom lip gently with his thumb “open.”

you part your lips slightly

yoongi slides a lollipop into your mouth and you immediately hum contently

peaches and cream!!!!!!!!

needless to say the lollipop actually does a pretty solid job at keeping you quiet

well

kinda

yoongi might have to pull out his spare bandana or something for extrA reinforcements but he’s kind of preoccupied right now

yoongi’s tattooed arm wraps around your middle and he has a hand gripping your hip as he presses you flush to him

“yoOngi- oh, god, yoongi-“ you gasp

he buries his face in your neck before starting to kiss and suck marks into your skin

“so fucking tight-“ yoongi grunts and you nEarly crunch down on the lollipop when he hits that golden spot

“mmpH-“ you suck exTra hard around the lollipop when yoongi picks up the pace

you can barely keep yourself up

you’re tempted to just floP down on the desk and let him have you like that

each snap of his hips against your lower back is more powerful than the next

ur literally going to break a tooth this lollipop thing was not a good idea

you yank it out of your mouth and it drops to the desk with a clatter

also it was making you drool big time and you don’t know if that’s a particularly sexy look or not

honestly you’re pretty sure yoongi doesn’t care whether you’re loud or not because yOU could care less about your volume

“f-fuck, yoongi,” your eyes roll to the back of your head when yoongi’s hand slithers in between your legs “oh, my god-“ your knuckles turn white as you grip the sides of his desk

“too loud, baby,” yoongi smirks as he nips at your shoulders gently

“s-sorry, ‘m sorry- nngh-“ you can feel his stomach muscles clenching against your back and that only spurs you on

“you gonna cum for me, hm?” you can hear the strain in his voice and you can’t help but feel a liTTle cocky now that you know you have just as much of an effect as he has on you

“c’mon, be a good girl n cum for me…” he rasps against the shell of your ear and that’s all it takes for you to completely loSe it

you immediately slump against the desk as your arms give out

you’re a whimpering mess as yoongi continues fucking you through your orgasm

his hand falls from in between your legs to grip your hip again and he presses soothing kisses along your back

“i wouldn’t suggest going in there if i were you.” namjoon warns as jimin approaches the door to the general office

“why not? and why.,.,. are you sitting out here instead of at the counter.,,.,.”  

“why do you think?”

“yoOngi- oh, god, yoongi-“

jimin gawks and yanks his hand away from the door handle as if it shOcked him “do- do they know we’re all still here???”

“yep.” namjoon hums nonchalantly and flips to the next page of his book “just give ‘em some time.”

“how muCH time??”

“i think half an hour will suffice.”

“by the sounds of it it seems like they’re going to want more than half an hour.” jimin mutters  

okay

you’re pretty sure jungkook was a serial killer in his past life

“sTOP IT yOU PSYCHOPATH” you shriek and make your fouRth round sprinting around the garage

jungkook cackles with glee behind you as he continues pointing the electric drill at you and pushing down on the trigger

you haven’t looked behind you but you can heAR the vRRRt vRt vRRRRTttTTT and you are scared out of your MIND

you made an offhand comment about how you feel like you should start working out and jungkook graciously offered to help you with some cardio

but you didn’t know what would mean him chasing you around the garage threatening to drill a hole into your head

and at first it was funny but now you genuinely think he wants to screw you (not like thAt)

“ooF-“ you stumble riGht into yoongi’s chest and you would’ve fallen flat on your ass had he not reached out and grabbed onto you

“what the hell are you doing??? that’s so dangerous!” yoongi snaps as jungkook finally catches up to you “if you’re going to waste your time by goofing off i’ll make you stay extra late to clean the washrooms - and that goes the same for you, miss ‘i need to finish my essay’.”

uM

why are you getting scolded??? you don’t even woRK here

maybe they’re all psychopaths and its just taken you a while to notice

“oh pLease like you weren’t goofing off earlier” jungkook grumbles and hands the drill over to yoongi

“what are you talking about?”

“don’t act like you weren’t fucking y/n into next week like two hours ago-“

yoongi gives him a warning look and-

vRT VRT

jungkook screeches

ok ya that was not enjoyable now he can see why you were so terrified

“yOoOooooonGGGGGiiiIiI-“

“y/n, i’m really, really busy right now” yoongi points out as he gestures to all the parts lying around him

“i know, but i need you to come here for a sec!!!!” he can SEE how big your pout is even though you’re halfway across the garage

“can’t you wait for like another 20 minutes-“

“pLeEEeEEeeeEEAAaaAaaASssSssEEEEe-“

yoongi lets out a huff and rolls his eyes playfully because he’s pretty sure you’re not going to cut it out if he doesn’t go over to you right now

hoseok snorts when he sees you pull out the puppy dog eyes

“you go take care of that, i’m sure we’ll survive without you for five minutes”

cLAnK

yoongi and hoseok both whIp their heads around to the source of the sound and jungkook’s standing there with a sheepish smile on his face

he just dropped a fuel filter it’s not a big deal

“alright, i’ll be right back.” yoongi tosses the rag over his shoulder before jogging over to you

“what’s up?”

you flip to the next page of the magazine without looking up at yoongi

“i’d like a lollipop please.”

//……r u kidding

yoongi’s eyes flicker to the office door “…you’re like 10 steps away from the office. i was halfway across the garage.”

you put the magazine down and pout up at him “please? strawberry, preferably.”

yoongi narrows his eyes at you and crosses his arms “why am i doing this for you again?”

“because you like me” you respond simply and shrug casually

“ah, i guess you got me there.” he leans down and you grin exciTedly because u always like kissing yoongi

you instinctively lean up and purse your lips

but you’re moRe than surprised when he doesn’t kiss you but hovers over your mouth instead

“you have feet. get one for yourself.” he murmurs lowly

he gives your top lip a gentle little kith before patting your cheek and heading back to the boys

wha-

okay noW you’re definitely getting your dad to sue min mechanics

[hg80summer-blog]

Untitled or (The flute of Azathoth)

(This story is conceived and finished during the Fall of 2018)

Newspapers as a dying medium had struggled for a while by now, and the descent into the complete and utter abyss of extinction seemed to be accelerating in a jaw-dropping velocity. There was no wonder why her press was struggling financially, every newspaper outlet was, hers was just more severe. She was now standing in the line, waiting for her coffee, and that bastard of a teenager standing in front of her was texting on his phone while blasting loud and obnoxious music out of that headset around his neck, which kinda defeats the purpose of a headset. She was beyond annoyed, of course.

“Kid.”

The kid raised his head up, saw this middle aged red-haired woman standing right in front of him.

“What?”

“Would you mind turning off the music.” She said, tried to be as kind as possible, “This is a coffee shop, not a public park, nor it is the subway, though you really shouldn’t be doing this kind of stuff in those places either.”

The kid turned off the music, visibly fuming, but didn’t say a word.

She smiled. Proud of her own work, of talking a kid out of his annoying and selfish behavior. The line before her had shrunk, and now finally after a 20 mins long wait, which for sure would be the reason that she would be late for work again today, it was her turn to order the coffee.

The guy behind the counter was visually disgusting. Obviously of his teenage, pimples and blemishes were all over his cheeks, two bloodshot eyes suggested an intense binge the night before, or the influences of pots. Droopy nose, dull gazes, and a messily worn uniform, all permeated the sense of purposelessness and a faineant. She chuckled to herself, found that description of the cashier formed by her own head to be extremely amusing.

“Miss!” The teen was almost shouting at that point. “What can I help you with today?”

“Um...” She came back from her daze, “A cup of coffee will do. Lots of cream lots of sugar.”

As she held the hot coffee with both of her hands to help combat the chilling weather of the recent days, the front door was pushed open and a gust of breeze rushed into the store. Then the door just stayed open, and the cold air just kept pestering her scarfed neck. Finally, after a few moments of tolerance, she turned her head to see who was so irresponsible to not even close the door on their way in.

It was a sickly obese man sitting in a wheelchair, trying to get through the narrow doorway of the coffee store. The staff came to his help, but his scooter was just way too big to fit in. His oily face was filled with anger and the expression of dissatisfaction and discontent, his floppy arms were flying in the air, and his mouth was uttering the voice of complaint. Those who had suffered greater for a better cause, and now there is this fat guy standing in front of the coffee place wailing at the waiter because the door was too small for him and his enormous scooter. She tittered at the concept, took another sip of the coffee.

They didn’t put enough cream in it. It was bitter. 

* * *

“So. Are you free tomorrow?”

She raised her head.

“Hilbert.” She sighed.

“Are you that disappointed to see me?” The man languidly leaning on the glass panel of her cubicle was wearing a grey sweater, and always had been wearing a grey sweater.  Ever since the first day she met him, he was wearing a grey sweater. He pushed his glasses up with the back of his hand, “What are you working on right now?”

“Editing the report of that one ghetto.”

“How is it.”

“It’s um… it’s alright.”

“It’s interesting. It’s not… great?”

“Well, you know.” She turned her gaze back onto the screen.

“Listen, you care for a drink?”

The blue light illuminated her face, drenched her expressionless features with a somber tone. The cubicles of their publishing house were all so small and squishy, and dark as well for some reason, the light just couldn’t reach here it seemed. She often compared this place to that torture chamber in Edgar Allen Poe’s short story, where a pendulum axe was hanging above the stomach of the tortured inmate, and as time run off it would slowly descent and brings the inevitable doom to the poor soul, presenting the most gruesome death to any spectator too sick to not turn their eyes away. Weren’t they the readers? The idea popped up in her head just as her gaze locked on the statistics provided in the article that she was editing. The article was riddled with grammatical errors and faulty statistics, to the point of near incoherence. The writer of the piece was this overweight old fart, who practically lived in the publishing house since he owned no property whatsoever besides all his stationeries, the old fashioned typewriter of his and a seldom working printer, along with all those borderline trash hoarded in his own dorm room. He divorced a decade ago, lost his house to his wife, estranged with his son and daughter, and had been diagnosed to be severely diabetic. Though he had one thing to be proud of -- being the oldest employee of this publishing house, working here for at least twenty-something years. She found that funny, very funny. The old fart had lost all his abilities to write an adequate article for the press, but the house would never fire him just because he was the most senior member of them all. The reader was the sick one. She realized. When the reader read that short story, they were the one expecting the axe to cut the man in two, and even though in that story of Poe’s, the man escaped, but if theoretically the axe did come down and the man did got split into two parts, the reader would not turn away from the gore, because they yearned for it.  

“I presumed you don’t have anything to do this afternoon.”

“No.” She then realized he was still there. “I am free.”

“Care for a drink in my place?”

“How is your work?”

“It’s um… it’s alright. I need to review a play before I could go any further though, so that is bummer.”

“Tea?” She pulled out her draw, “Got some bags here. I could get you a cup if you want.”

“No thanks… listen…”

“Ey.” The receptionist, April, walked to her cubicle, with a commanding tone of voice and an everlasting despise on her face, “Someone was at the door. He said he came to see you.”

Obsequious sycophant, the harlot blew our boss under the desk. But it was rather a pleasant surprise. She had no relatives around this state, let alone with this city, nor did she have any friends laying around, so someone coming to visit her during work was actually a change of pace that she was not expecting.

“He said his name was John.”

The bench in the front door bore quite a bit of history actually. This press house was fairly old after all, but before its time, the building was actually a police station for the local towns. The bench was there for those who were arrested to have a rest before being dragged into whatever room that was needed for them to be dragged into. Unlike those things, the bench remained.

“I got you some tea.” She said.

He took the cup with the coaster, took a sip, and an expression of disgust emerged on his face.

“You never liked my tea, uh?” She said. “You never liked it, not even for a day.”

“I didn’t say that.”

“You said that quite often, actually.” She sat down on the other end of the bench, “How is ma?”

He frowned at the question, took another sip of the tea. It was bitter. She knew it. She made it that way, and she wanted to say she made it that way unconsciously, but it really was not that convincing, not even to herself.

“She was feeling better.” He said. “She is feeling better.”

“Like how? Has she gone back home yet?”

“She is feeling better.”

“Is she still in the hospital?”

“You should be asking her that instead of me.”

“What do you mean I should be asking her?” She said, unintentionally raising and heating up her voice.

“I mean you should go ask her how she is.” He said, then he took a huge gulp of the tea, swallowing it with a painful and totally not exaggerated countenance.

“You do not like the tea. I see.”

“I did not say that.”

“You did.” Anger brewed within her, and slowly but surely she was edging on the cliff of an outburst. “You hate my tea. You always had. Now stop jumping all over the place. I know how much of a busy gentleman you are, and coming to visit me was merely the byproduct of a trip or something. How is ma doing? Answer me!”

“DON’T YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT!” He suddenly yelled out, almost spilling the rest of the tea, “I AM YOUR BROTHER!” Acerbate, his eyes bloodshot, and veins walled off his forehead like the defense lines from the battle of Stalingrad. He composed himself in mere seconds though, then made a deep breath, “Do not raise your voice at me.” He said, trying to be as calm as possible.

Silence dawned.

She stared out the front door. The long cold breeze blew through the empty but littered street. The press house located at the unheeded corner of the city, so of course vacancy and dead silences were the prevalent frequenter. The winter was longer than before, and harsher. The blanket in her house couldn’t even provide enough warmth for her to fall asleep without being bedeviled by nightmares and long dreams, which was why she was planning to go shopping for a quilt this afternoon to get her through the winter.

“Have you cleared the payment of your house?” He suddenly asked.

“Yes.” She said, still gazing at the street.

“So you own a house now.”

“An apartment, to be exact.”

“How is it?”

“It’s um… it’s alright.”

“It’s interesting. It’s not… great?”

She turned her gaze at him, and didn't answer.

A short pause. He looked at his watch, “Shoot, gonna go. The plane is flying in two.” He stood up. “Thanks for the tea.”

“You are welcome.”

He walked out of the building with festinate steps.

She picked up the cup he left behind, not a drop of tea was left behind.

As she was walking back to her office, or cubicle, she was stopped by the receptionist sitting at the front desk, once again.  

“Ron wants to see you. Like right now.”

She definitely swallows. She thought to herself.

“Thanks, April.” She said with a smile on her face. “I am going, right now.”

When she came back from her boss’s office, she saw Hilbert was still standing around her cubicle.

“Why are you still here?”

“Tea break. Where else can I go in this dreadful place.”

Truly it is a dreadful place. Not just this place. The city in general. What a hell hole. What an absolute hellhole. A place where gun shooting can happen so regularly it became one of the mundane. A place where sunlight was toxic and rains were acidic, umbrellas became a necessity on every day of the year. A place where morality is nothing but a piece of shredded newspaper flying across the empty blocks, so the homeless people will stab those who offer alms and helping hand, and bosses will force their female, or male who give a rat crap, force their female employees to suck their phallic one, and fat people would roam around the street while someone else starve to their lurid death. This place is dreadful. Truly dreadful. She could feel her spine split open from the middle, and raised into the sky like the skeleton of the birds' wings, so she could crash through the window of their press and leave this place once and for all.

“It’s alright.” She said, sat back down in her cubicle, and started to pack things up. “I need to finish my work now, you should get going as well.”

“Yeah… yeah… of course.” He said. After a small pause, he turned and about to leave.

“Hey. Hilbert.” She stopped him.

“Yes?”

“Where are we gonna meet for the drinks this afternoon?”

* * *

His house was as dilapidated as ever, with its shoddy door frame and chintzy carpets, molded corners and peeled off ceilings. Just like before.

"Is Bourbons on rocks okay with you?" He pulled out some glasswares and a bottle of Bourbons, cheap.

"I am alright. I don't drink no more."

He was pouring the liquor, and her words paused him, "When did that happen?"

"Happened a long time ago."

He resumed pouring a glass, clearly for himself, "Well, what can I help you with then?"

"A cup of hot coffee will be alright."

"Sugar and cream."

"Yeah."

The backyard still had that one tree in the middle. It had shed all its leaves, and what remained of it was only a wizen skeletal contour of its former self. There was a working table right underneath it, clearly, a birdhouse was in the making.

"Dickinson kept bugging me about this birdhouse. Really don't know where the obsession for birds came from." He said, walked up to the table. "It's almost finished by now."

"I can give a hand." She really did not want to, but the fact that he brought up Dickinson and the birdhouse kinda made it no longer a viable option.

"That would be so nice of you."

The squirrel on the street looked anemic, lack of food source might have already taken a toll on it. What a pathetic sight. It just oozed with dreariness, which made it quite fitting for this place. This abhorrent city, abhorrent place, where the winter is so goddamn long.

“Someone is getting laid off, let me tell you that.” He said, cutting down the pine board as he was speaking. “Someone is gone, that is all I know. The house was not profitable, they had to kick someone off. For sure wouldn’t be that geezer sitting in the back of the office all the time being as unproductive as possible. Bunch of schmucks, am I right?”

She didn’t answer. She simply helped him attach the board onto the tree with some deck screws, then she just stood aside, watching him nailing down every single one of those holes.

“I need to visit ma.” She uttered.

“Oh? You planning to take out the rest of your yearly vacation leave already?” He said, “You know there is still Christmas.”

“I don’t need to take out anything.”

Just as he finished cutting the corner of the birdhouse floor, he realized. “Oh my lord…” He moaned, then he drank all the remaining Bourbon in the glass in one gulp, “What have they done? How could they…”

“I need to visit ma.” She interrupted him, calmly, “Would you be so kind and drive me to the airport this Sunday?”

“Sure, when are you gonna be back?”

She handed him a bunch of finishing nails, “Nail them.”

He did. Then he just stood there, looking at her. She remained unmoved, stared back at him with a gaze just as bleak as ever. “Are you serious?” He asked.

She handed him the last bit of nails.

“You are for real. Are you just gonna leave all these behinds?”

“Like what? What will I be leaving behind, Hilbert.” She raised her voice ever so slightly, and the tone of anger would not go unnoticed.

He still seemed determined to convince her, but after a ponder or two, he stayed silent. He couldn’t even come up with an excuse. The sheer incompetence of it bemused her.

There was no proper answer besides silence, so he nailed down the floorboard with the rest of the nails.

“Would you hand me the roof?”

She did. He put the roof to the side with some more deck screws.

The birdhouse was finished. They stepped back a little, observing their work.

“Well, you would at least be leaving something behind now.” He said, tittered.

She found that humorous. She truly did, but she didn’t laugh, not even a chuckle.

On their way out, Hilbert invited her to dinner, and a play. It was the play he was supposed to do a review on, and it would be performed in the local theatre on Thursday night. He said he got two tickets from the press, but he had no one to go with, so he was thinking of selling that ticket to earn some extra cash. Now that she was leaving, he wanted this to be to their farewell event. As she was imaging burning the theatre down, she accepted the offer.

The play’s name was John.

* * *

She walked out of the theatre with a face of complete shock. It was a mind contorting catharsis. She felt sick, so she bent down and tried to puke out whatever the dirt and smut that was in her, but she hadn't eaten anything since yesterday, so she gagged on dirty airs, and choked on her own cold dark pride. Now she felt better, and her eyesight was now expanded for at least thirty degrees more than normal. Limbs felt duplicated, like many copies of them were behind each and every single move she made, shadowing her actual limbs with poor imitations. The play resonated. She could feel the play, and the storyline was giving her romantic kisses on her cheek along with the winter wind like she was being loved in the most intimate way that was possible. Making love. The play had made love with her.

She stood straight. The street was clean, people were walking out of the theatre, discussing the masterpiece they just saw.

Hilbert was standing next to her.

“Wow.” He said, seemed to be dazed by what he just saw.

“Indeed.” She answered. “I felt kinda sick.”

“Oh… I am so sorry.”

“In a good way.”

“Oh. It’s… alright.”

It's not alright, it’s great! She screamed in her heart.

“You need to head home then if you are feeling sick.”

“I will. Thanks for the play and dinner.”

“You are welcome. You have a way back right?”

“Yeah… buses.”

“I will see you around…”

She lolloped along the street for a bit, then she called a cap. Dragging herself onto the car became a harsh and relentless mission, but she did succeed at it. The taxi driver was this benign old man, with a green cap and a grey sweater on. He asked her if she was alright because she looked pale and sick. His face was furrowed beyond belief, but his voice was so mellow and chummy, and his expression so elder and kind. Befuddled by the nice old man, she told him the destination and closed her eyes shut pretending to be asleep. When the taxi got to her house, and as her feet were stepping out of her car, the driver gave her his blessing by telling her to have a good one, even though it was already two in the morning.

She got home, poured herself a glass of whiskey, and laid down her bed staring right at the ceiling. The alcohol ran through her throat like a double-decker bus operated by an inebriated Scottish man, and they burnt. She felt enlightened. The play she just saw sang songs within her head, and her mind became its backup singer. She had never felt so understood, no one had ever given her this feeling of absolute empathy, like the one who wrote this play actually knew her personally and knew her entire life up until this point. She gave a standing ovation when the curtain was drawn, and even now when she was already on her bed in her own soon to be former house, she still wanted to give the play another standing ovation. The script of the play had literally zero paid off, but the sense of loss and bloatedness and purposelessness and loneliness of life it had provided literally synchronized with her most inner emotions, like two magnets left near each other would just crash into each other with full forces, or two teens in their nonage with their unhinged hormones sucking each other’s face off in their embrace, or that one meteoroid leaped into earth during the extinction of dinosaurs.

She was drunk. She knew that, because she could see her own pallid volitant soul gyrated to the ceiling, ululating the sound of liberation. It flew all over the place, every corner of the room, and even tripped over the glass which still had some remaining whiskey in it. Elated by its presence, she cackled, then burst out in braying laughter. She would continue to lay on her bed, downing glasses after glasses of whiskey, and laugh and cry herself into sleep. She would do that because, for the first time of her life, she felt understood.

* * *

April looked just as beautiful as ever, with all the makeup and ludicrously expensive headgears. She was so young, and the blossoming youth could be seen from her ample bosom and ripe torso. She still got such a bright future ahead of her. She thought, so she walked up to the front desk. April saw her walking towards her, and gave her a giant PR smile. She smiled back, and thanked her for all the help she offered all these years.

As she cleaned out all of her belongings and cleared out her cubicle, sentimentality flooded her mind. She would miss this job, no matter how bad it may be from time to time, maybe she would miss this city as well. This job, this press house, was the epitome of a good chunk of her life, pleasant or not. Life was just too floaty and vacuous for one to insist it to be something enjoyable. All the bitterness she had gone through in this less than six feet square cubicle, now only amounts to a faint, lingering sweetness aloft her tongue. She smiled at the past, put the last of her possession, a Japanese peace Lily, into the cardboard box.

She was about to turn off the computer, and leave this house for one last time, but then she decided to read the newest draft of their newspaper, to see her final contribution to this press house. The last of her presence in this place that represented so much for her.

There was her work. The report about a slump near this area, written by that well-respected senior, edited by her.

Then she scrolled down a bit. Another article emerged.

The Cynical Banality -- A Critique of John

by Hilbert Johnson  

The latest trend among the circle of artsy, pretentious writers had slipped further into the depth of inanity it seems. The newest sensation, John, by Annie Baker, was truly the greatest piece of theatre work I have ever seen, due to how revealing it is, that through simply watching the play we can truly and intimately feel the cynicism of those writers and how little respect they held for both writing and the art form of theatre.   

The play followed a vacation of a damaged couple, and through piles amongst piles of useless dialogues and set up, we got to an ending that is so shocking, the only proper emotional response I can contribute is a simple sigh and a “meh” if I was having a good day. This is probably the most time-wasting theatre experience I have ever been through, and with my whole heart and with all my respect to anything holy above, I mustered all of my strength just to not walk out in the mid-act, and after the play had ended, I wish I could scorn myself for holding up the integrity of being an audience, because clearly, the creator of the thing has no intention of holding up anything.

Anton Chekhov’s principle of firing a gun in the third act if the gun was presented in the first act, had been defenestrated in the most violent way that is possible. The number of guns this play had thrown out was truly mind-boggling, and of course, none of them even made a spark by the end of the play, let alone firing any of it. The amount of subverted expectations become mere statistical numbers by the second act, and none of them can induce any emotional response besides simple ennui. Set up led to nothing, and half of the stuff the script had offered was useless beyond belief. The story threw out countless dots to encourage the readers to connect them by themselves, but by the end none of them had any pay-off and audiences and readers just left wondering why they wasted their time with it. It was like if there is this breadcrumbs trail in the forest, it is interesting so you follow it, and the trails just lead you to more forest, and more forest, and finally the end of the trail is just more forest and nothing else. It is an infuriating experience. 

Besides the problem of having no paid off, the story was also clogged with useless assets that have no use whatsoever. To demonstrate the point, there is this entire scene in the play dedicated to a reading of the work from HP Lovecraft, The Call of Cthulhu, with no particular reasons and contributed nothing to the story. Why Lovecraft? Why not Edgar Allen Poe? Why The Call of Cthulhu, why not The Shunned House? No one would know the answer to those questions, because it doesn’t matter. It is like the writer just put some useless trash in between the actual story, just so it is different than the “normal” and “mundane” stories of the others. The play felt wider than an ocean but shallower than a piss creak, but somehow those high tier critiques now consider that quality of one that is a compliment. Maybe I am too stupid to realize the symbolism these informations, but isn’t it equally problematic when your play had nothing but symbolism?

Which leads me here. Not only the content I must criticize, but I also need to criticize the mentality of it as well. Critics say the play had perfectly captured the nature of human life, and the loneliness it had offered, praised it to be one of the best plays that year had to offer. How the play subverted the expectations of the audiences, bringing them to an emotional rollercoaster. How the play successfully captured human’s inner nihilism.

If such a story and writing concept were executed in a short story, I would not even have said a thing. But to put it in such a drag out script, was truly an insult. The play felt like it was written to subvert the audience’s expectation, for the sake of subverting the audience's expectation. It was breaking the golden rules of storytelling, for the sake of breaking the gold rules of storytelling. It was being special, for the sake of being special. It has this immunity of criticism since whenever anyone points out the flaws within the story of the storytelling techniques, it could be brushed under the rug by simply saying it was the intention of the script so it could mimic the meaninglessness of real life. It failed at every level of providing a joyful or anything remotely close to an enjoyable experience for the audience, then turned its head and said it was doing so intentionally. It felt like a work created by the most high-end writer, just so he or she could break more new ground and receive more praise from all of her also high-end colleagues, the top five percent of the population. But this play was also genius enough to pander to the bottom five percent of the population, by presenting nihilism as its topmost quality. According to anecdote, when the play premiered at Paris, viewed by normal theatre-goers, all of them walked out in protest, but when the play was put on the San Francisco Prison, all of the prisoners gave it a stand-up ovation for how close and real the play had represented life itself.

How benevolent of an idea. In that case, whenever criticisms was brought up, this anecdote would just be the last nail of the coffin for the critique. Who you would want to side with, the poor and oppressed prisoners from San Francisco, or the smug, overprivileged theatre-goers from Paris? Case closed.

Truly cynical. To make a play so intentionally abhorrent for any normal viewer, and so pandering to those who are the most vulnerable along with those who are on the very top. It is truly disgusting to see the current mentality of creating art had regressed to a point where a Pulitzer Award-winning writer would write something like this, just to poke and enrage the normal viewers, then slap them across the face and scorn them for not understanding true hardship of human life, and being a privileged arse.

Art is based on real life, and above it. Imitating real life with art in this fashion, truly could only be described as pathetic. 

If I am being as cynical as the writer, I would answer the previously asked question like this:

Who actually, wholeheartedly, wants to side, or go along with the prisoners in San Francisco, rather than those so-called fancy theatre attendees from Paris. Sure, everyone would say they would go for the prisoners, and condemn how privileged those theatre-goers are, but are we honest to ourselves? Between the Id, ego, and superego, which part of us is speaking when we said we would side with the prisoners?

I don’t want to be so cynical, I truly don’t. But when faced with a play created for the top five percent and the bottom five percent of the population and no one else, created to break all the established rules for the sake of breaking established rules instead of breaking traditions because it would help the storytelling or the style of the work, created not to express a message to or provide any entertainment to the public but rather to scorn and educate them for being one of the mundane, created to be as artsy as possible and as high end as possible, I don’t really know the way to keep my cynicism in check. I am just a mundane guy, who went to a theatre expecting something, anything that is not a cynical piece of esoteric mock, and before I can do anything about it, my money and my time were wasted into the thin air in return of absolutely nothing.

I still haven’t mentioned how western-centric this play is, how any other culture that values practicalism and collectivism instead of romanticism and individualism of the westerners would despise this play with their most core value, and how racially insensitive it is for it to be exclusively enjoyed and judged by western audiences, but I have had enough. If I keep talking about this thing, the seed of migraine in my head will be out of control.  

This is true cynicism.

It has some terrific writing techniques, and the restraint and subtlety of the writing were all beautiful, but it can’t amount to all the other issues I have with the script, not even close.

I gave it a strong two to a light three, out of ten.

John, by Annie Baker, 3/10

By Hilbert Johnson

  * * *

Look at this fat bastard. Oily and greasy, how in all the bloody but holy hell can he get a job? She thought to herself, as the waiter standing in front of her was waiting for her to order something. What a waste of resources. Truly morality had got itself into some sort of unremitting horror, just so this creature can serve in an overpriced airport cafe.

“Nothing. Thanks.” She said.

“What you two want for drinks then?” The waiter asked, clearly empty-minded at this moment.  

“Uh I would want some sweet tea, and for the lady here, a cup of hot coffee, lots…”

“Black.”

Hilbert paused for a second. “Make it black then.”

The waiter walked off, and a cup of sweet tea and coffee were put on the table.

“So that’s it.” Hilbert said, taking a sip of the sweet tea, “No way to convince you.”

“You do not have to. Nor is there a necessity for you to do so.” She said, took a sip of the coffee.

Bitter.

“How about the apartment? You just clear your debt for it.”

“Sell it. Or rent it. You don’t have to worry.”

“You sure you don’t want to eat anything before you got on the plane?”

“No. I am fine. You can get something to eat if you want.”

“No.”

“Then we can just have a drink can’t we?”

Pause. Silence. Just the noise of her sipping her coffee.

“I want to apologize.” He finally spoke.

“Not necessary.” She then followed it up with: “For what?”

“I am so sorry about that play that night. It was truly not my intention… I don’t know better.”

“It was a pleasant night.”

“It was truly awful to waste our time like that. I don’t know what the play was about. I should’ve done some more research on it before inviting you…”

“I am actually kind of hungry.” She suddenly uttered. She waved for the waiter, this time the waiter was no longer fat and ugly, but still possessed the same uninvested attitude and disgusting demeanor for a waiter to have. “May I have a slice of the cheesecake, the plain one.”

“Yea, and what the good sir wants?”

“Huh… refill my tea.”

The cheesecake tasted like anesthetic, and it was also bitter.

“I just want you to know, I did not intend for the play to be that... indescribable.”

“It is alright.” She said, finishing the cheesecake with her fork.

“So uh… this will probably be the last time we have a meal together, in a very long time.”

“You want some cheesecake as well?”

“No… thanks.”

“The play was very good.”

“You really don’t have to say that… I felt guilty enough as it is…”

“My plane is almost here.”

“I will walk you to the…”

“You still have work, Hilbert. Thanks for all these years.”

“For sure.”

“Take care.”

“Yea.”

She left, leaving him alone, sitting in the airport cafe.

The cup of black coffee she ordered was not finished.

* * *

The old man laying on the bed looking unfamiliar and strange, elder as well, like some kind of eldritch monster. The bed was made with a clean white sheet, and the flowers next to the bed were all withered and shriveled. The Filipino nurse came in and took those flowers out of the vase, and replaced it with fresh white lilies. That corner of the room looked so clean compared to the rest like it was just created out of thin air minutes ago, like no one had ever walked into that corner of the room ever before. She walked around the room, confused, walked back to the front desk. The receptionist there looked like even more of a whore than April, which was quite an achievement considering the environment they were now in was not the most casual place for one to be working in, she was expecting some kind of professionalism at the very least. The nurse pushed her away because she was blocking the hallway, she stepped back a little, asked the receptionist, who was also a nurse.

The receptionist spent forever going through her computer, then she pulled out a bunch of paperwork and asked her to sign.

She was confused, she asked her the question again. The nurse stared back at her with the most intense gaze like she had just accused her of murder.

Murder.

Like an unclogged sink, she now realized why.

* * *

Rustling leaves and moaning sky, darkening the land with argentine clouds, screaming winds and blinding rainstorm. Somehow the moving company was still working even under such harsh conditions. Laborers and workers carried out those old familiar pieces of furniture and threw them onto the truck with the most apathetic attitude one could have ever have, but who could blame them, not a single person would be glad to work amidst an incoming storm, but uncultured man do uncultured job, who could blame anyone for it? She walked past those people, walked directly into the house. One of the workers stopped her, said the house was under construction and unrelated personnel should stay away, she said I am more related to this house than I would ever want to admit to myself and the police would be on their way if you keep blocking my way. The worker, of course, stepped back.

He was sitting on one of the wooden antique chairs of theirs, in the middle of a practically empty living room, seemed like the movers were doing their job quite efficiently. He was reading a book. Atlas shrugged. What a surprise. Men love it. They goddamn love it. Hilbert once read that book as well, and he wouldn’t shut up about it for the next three months. Truly one has to treat themselves with godhood to think of themselves worthy of the position of Atlas where he could have just shrugged away all of his weight. She had never read the book.

He rose his head and saw her standing at the door, with a black bedraggled umbrella on her hand.

“Holy moly! Why are you here?”

“Why did you lie to me?”

“When are you back? You should have told me about it.”  

“Why did you not tell me?”

“Why would you be here anyway? I really didn’t expect you to come.”

“Answer me.”

“You want some tea?”

“John.” She was gnashing. “Answer me.”

“There is still some coffee lying around.”

A short silence.

“A cup of coffee would be nice.”

“I don’t have much sugar though, and I think those creams have certainly expired…”

“Black.”

There were two wooden antique chairs in the living room now, and a small wooden teapoy between the two. A cup of coffee and a cup of sweet tea were placed on the teapoy, along with the book Atlas shrugged.

“When was ma gone?”

“Two weeks ago.” He took a sip of the tea. “Ah… perfect for a rainy day like this. A cup of hot sweet tea.”

“Why did you not tell me?”

“Do you know ma was extremely proud of us?”

She didn’t answer.

“Of course you don’t. Why would you? She kept telling me not to bother you. She didn’t want to bother you. She said to me, don’t bother her because her job working for that international trading company must be straining.”

“Why did you not tell me?”

“She said not to bother you.”

“What?” Truly enraged, she was progressively getting angrier as the conversation continued, “You didn’t tell me ma is gone, because she told you not to bother me?”

“Well, she didn’t want to bother you! You have a busy job.”

“So you didn’t tell me my mom is dead!? When exactly did she die again?”

“Uh… the funeral was this Monday…”

“Funeral? What funeral?”

“Funeral for ma. Everyone was there…”

“And you didn’t tell me my ma is dead! And you didn’t tell me about the funeral?”

“She said not to bother you… I listened to her.”

“What are you, mad?” She stood up in rage. “You didn’t tell me my mom is goddamn dead because she told you not to bother me?”

“Yes exactly!” He was vexed as well, for some reason, he was clearly in the wrong here so god knows what could possibly be fueling his fury. “Exactly, I didn’t tell you ma is dead because she told me not to! And by god! It took some amount of repetition to get this across that thick goddamn skull of yours!”

“We met on Tuesdays! We talked in the press house! And even then you still lied right to my face!”

“I didn’t lie to you. She told me not to bother…”

“You lied to me! You sultry little squid piss lied! You told me…”

“I DIDN’T LIE TO YOU! SHE WAS FEELING BETTER! SHE IN ALL HELL GODDAMN WAS!”

The scream was ugly, intense, and truly horrifying. Every other screams before this one shivered in its presence.

“I couldn’t drink tea no more.” He sat back down. “They all tasted bitter.”

“Me neither. I couldn’t drink coffee, because sugar and cream just make it more bitter…” She sat back down also.

Silence. The storm outside bellowed.

“I enjoyed some theatre art recently.” He suddenly voiced. “Have you heard of a play called ‘John’?”

Just when she was about to answer, a mover walked in.

“Sir, the furniture is all loaded on the truck now.”

“Sure, have a break, wait till the storm blows over.”

The worker gave her a gaze, then walked out of the house.

What a fat piece of trash. She thought.

The End 

[reblogdolan]

Kinda wanna that “grayson gets mad at y/n and then is sad bc he upset her” or something like that.... I’m a sucker for a good make up story 😁 please and thank you!!

One of my fav plotlines. This does mention reader getting scared by gray but nothing violent happens just the mention of it. If that triggers you in any way please do not read.

Y/N had been busy at work not able to see Grayson much during the current week. Grayson had been busy filing and hadn’t really had time to talk to her. Tonight was the night they were going to be able to hang out together for the first time in a while and they were both very excited. Y/N got ready to head over to the Dolan house. Once she got there she walked right into Grayson’s room to see him sitting shirtless on his desk chair editing his video. She gave him a quick kiss on his cheek before going to sit on his bed knowing that when he was in editing mode he didn’t really pay attention to anything else. But an hour passed and then another and she was starting to grow annoyed. She wanted him, craved him any part of him. She just wanted to be close. So when she saw him getting frustrated and bang his hands on his desk she just wanted to be next to him. She remembers another time when this happened because it happens often. The twins work late finishing videos when things don’t go to plan all the time. Usually, she could distract Gray for a bit and then he would finish quicker after just needing a quick boost of energy from her. Other times she would just sit next to him while he finished just to be close. Y/N soon learned that this time was so different from the others. See what Y/N didn’t know was that they had to refilm this video this morning because the footage got lost. She didn’t know that he had been editing all day and still wasn’t done. She didn’t know that for the past hour the program kept freezing. See Gray wanted to be close to her too he wanted to feel her touch, but he also knew he needed to get this video out. He just wished he didn’t have to deal with it tonight. He was already tired from today and he didn’t want to have to edit all night but that is what it seemed like it was turning out to be. Gray was getting close to finishing the video when the program froze again his fist connecting with the desk he was sitting at. Y/N came over to him rubbing his shoulders as she came around to the front of him placing a quick kiss to his forehead. 

“Baby why don’t you take a break”

“I can’t Y/N” The tone he had was cold, colder than with Gray was angry. She could sense that he was at his breaking point soon. She wanted to help him, wanted him to take a short break even if that meant her editing for him, which she had also done before.

“Baby take a break and I’ll edit for you” She went to click but gray had pushed her hand away causing her to delete a line of the edit. His face instantly dropping stone cold. He pushed out of the chair. See both Grayson and Y/N knew that he could just hit undo and it would all come back but to Gray, at that moment nothing but more work could fix what Y/N had done. He had hit his breaking point and Y/N knew instantly because though Gray can get mad he had never once looked directly into her face while she was basically up against a wall and yelled at her like he was doing right then. 

“See this is why I don’t need your fucking help Y/N you always fucking ruin everything, always fucking break everything. And you see. You see now I have to work fucking longer than I would have because you had to try to fucking help” The yelling was directed at her eye contact held the entire time. All she saw was the pure anger in his face. Until his hand raised and she flinched back. See gray wasn’t going to hit her he was going to rub his hand through his hair like he always did when he was angry or frustrated but this was different to Y/N. Gray did not get angry at her often. And like mentioned previously he always yelled, in general, he never yelled directly at her so when she saw his hand came up it instantly made her recoil. 

She watched Gray’s hand run through his hair after she stepped back, but she always watched as his face turned from hard to soft instantly. He looked at her and then to the door as he began to walk out. Y/N wanted to chase after him but she also knew that he may be just needed time to his self. But she didn’t hear his car start like it usually would after they fought. No, this time instead as she sat down on his bed, she watched him through the window. She watched him walk out the back door and sit down on the concrete near the pool his knees pulled to his chest his hands around them and his face buried down. She saw him shaking, saw his body jolting from the emotions running through him. See most girls probably would have ran, but Y/N was different, she knew Gray. Y/N knew Gray would never hurt her no matter how angry or upset with her she was she knew that he would never ever do anything to hurt her. She knew he needed time and she watched Ethan walk out to him. She knew she had time to kill because she didn’t want to interrupt Ethan and Gray so she sat at his computer undoing what she had deleted and spent 20 mins fixing the rest of the video and starting the export. She watched Ethan walk into the house while Gray’s shaking form stayed on the ground. Usually, Grayson would be fine after talking to Ethan, Ethan could usually get him out of his head. Y/N was scared that he was deep into his anxiety now. She knew she needed to talk to him now she knew she needed him maybe even more then he needed her at that moment. So she headed out to see him and as she walked to the back she passed Ethan on the way

“He’s really upset”

“I know”

“he shouldn’t have done that though, I mean the way he was yelling”

“I know”

“But he’d never hurt you”

“I know E, I’m upset but I’m not mad at him he was stressed but look next time you guys have to spend time fixing a video maybe take some of the editing from him, I mean I don’t know if you were doing other stuff but Gray needs help sometimes too. You know how he gets he needs you too”

“I should’ve helped him earlier I know but”

“Look I’d love to talk this out with you E, I really honestly would but I need your brother right now”

“He needs you to” Ethan walked away as she walked out the house sliding the glass door closed behind her. She walked right up to Gray instantly dropping to the ground next to him. He pushed away slightly not wanting to be a reason she was afraid.

“Gray” he looked to her the whisper of his name cracking as she spoke it

“Y/N I”

“I know Gray, it’s okay”

“It’s not. I should have never have been yelling at you regardless of what I planned to do with my hand you were scared of me. Your face, you were, you were terrified of the way I was yelling and, fuck I just. I’m sorry”

“I know you are, I know your sorry Gray and that’s all that matters” his body instantly fell into hers as she felt the shaking from his body. “Gray, baby stop, your gonna get yourself into a panic”

““I don’t want you to ever be scared of me. The fear that was in your eyes and written all over your face is something I never wanna see in my life again Y/N. I never want you to…” 

“Baby look at me, I trust you. I trust you to keep me safe. I trust you to not hurt me. I trust you okay” With a kiss to his lips the passion coursing through Gray grabbed her into a hug.

“Let’s go inside Gray” She stood up leading him into his bedroom as she climbed right into his bed moving the covers for him to get in as well.

“Baby I gotta finish”

“Already done Gray”

“Wha, what?”

“I finished it up when you went outside there was only a little left it’s exporting now”

“You finished it even when I yelled at you, even when I”

“Gray I told you, I know who you are. that moment doesn’t define you. You needed help you were upset and frustrated so yeah I finished it even though you yelled. I’ll always be there Gray”

“I love you”

“I love you too, now come cuddle me”

“Don’t have to ask me twice” Doing what you knew best just shut him up, you reached up and kissed him. 

[nyruratchet]

Time...

“...Why you punish me?”

So, I explained last time the situation regarding the creation of my music...monetarily. But let me explain and expand on how my time is utilized on a monthly basis.

If I haven’t made it clear, I hate my job. But here’s the thing, it’s flexible (for the most part), has benefits: (insurance, free-ish air travel, scheduled pay increases). Cons: passengers are allowed to treat crew like shit, always working with new people (that you may not mesh well with), anyone you try establishing a relationship with has pre-conceived notions/little to no faith you will ever be around, pay SUCKS until you get REALLY senior (7+), and...more, but I digress. But that flexible schedule, albeit limited, has afforded me the ability to work on music; until it doesn't. 

See, I was getting “comfortable” in my work situation a few years ago until certain a situation beyond my control forced me into deep debt, bad credit, and deeper depression. In order to fix all of this, money is needed. How do u get money? Work more. More work leads to more depression and sometimes health issues. So, I’ve been stuck in this seamlessly endless cycle of paycheck to paycheck living. And my desire and NEED to work on my music has not helped it (as explained in the previous blog post). Every time I get a bit more money, it goes to my craft. 

See, after you put all that money into creating art, you have to then put it OUT there. And in the case of a performer, you need to do live performances. That is a whole other situation in itself. There are lots avenues to get live performance experience. Open mics, concert showcases, live cabaret/karaoke bars, etc. Guess what THEY ALL COST MONEY. But not only money, LOTS of excess time is involved. 

This past spring, I was dragged into a showcase by my producer friend (who I’m partially in love with but he’s straight...but that’s another story). In order to do a showcase, you have to apply for acceptance. Applications involve you submitting current work and having a worthy social media following (which you have had to spend constant time building). Once you fill out the application, send the files and info, PAY your entry fee ($25) and receive your acceptance, you then have to sell tickets. Yes, how do they get people to come to the showcase? By having YOU bring them. And if you cannot find people to buy your tickets, all of those tickets come out of YOUR pocket. So, I was given 25 tickets to sell (last minute mind you); 25 tickets to sell at $20 bucks each. So, if I don't sell them, I owe the company $500 dollars. Yup, that’s correct. In order for me to perform my original content on their stage, I needed to make sure they got their $525 and help them get people in the venue so that they buy drinks at the bar (which we were given ZERO drink tickets for). Now before stepping on stage, you don’t get a sound check. So, you show up early before everyone to check in and simply check they have your correct music file(s) then wait...and wait...and wait. But your music has to be edited within their restrictions (this means more studio time. Remember, studio time =more $$...just making sure ur following me. Too many times you’ll hear big recording artists talking about how they have just sat in studios for hours creating a song from scratch. Yeah, only if you are signed to major label is this a thing! But anyway...back to the showcase.) 

Needless to say, I did everything I needed to. But I had some help since I asked to do this last minute and told them UP FRONT they would have had to get that unsold ticket money from me in blood. I landed from working a redeye the day before, got a nap in, did my vocal exercises in my car on my way to New Jersey, checked in and sat there. Since some people didn't show up on TIME, I was abruptly grabbed from drinking my whiskey at the bar and told “YOU’RE ON NEXT!”  Being the seasoned professional that I am, took that shot to the head, said “Actually, that’s not my slot...but ok, I’m ready.” NO SOUND CHECK, NEVER given TIME on the stage beforehand...I went on. Sung my ass off with a standing ovation from the judges. Then, went back to drinking with my friends who were in shock because they had never heard me really sing live. Then I had sit for HOURS while mediocre “rappers” and “singers” rapped over pre-recordings of their own vocals. Finally, they were ready to announce the winners. I won that sucker.

But what did I win? ...A promise to be put into another show... *DICK FACE*  No money to recoup what I just spent getting to this moment. No free promotion on social media to help me and my art. NO, some bullshit. So, I took the experience fore what it was and cut my losses. I got some exposure and was able to test out an unreleased song...but besides that. Nothing but wasted time and effort. I left there feeling somewhere between elation and disappointment. Not to mention, I was exhausted; I had done all this after working my full time job, and had to work again the next day. So all I had time to do was drive home and sleep. 

“Like a wave bashing into the shore...

Since this, I have had some money issues and mental health issues, so I have just barely been able to work on music. On my days off, I have to sleep and get back in the groove of being a real person instead of a redeye zombie. Then when I’m feeling slightly normal, I’m back to work...it is a vicious, irritating, restraining cycle. I’ve tried working shorter flights so I’m home more; nope, the pairings (schedules) for those flights work you in a way that leaves you feeling raped. My company will build a pairing with a duty time of 27hrs and only pay you for 15-17 of those hours. DOESN’T MAKE SENSE. Then on top of that, your rest time at the hotel is set to 11hrs...WTF?? 

Let me explain this for those of you with normal jobs. On these pairings, you are schedule to work a number of flights each day. So, 3 day pairing means you work 3-4 flights each day and have 2 layovers. Now lets say FLIGHT time is 1.5-2.5 hrs each (8-12hrs). Then you land from your final flight for day one. We’re usually delayed at our carrier...honestly, rarely on time. So, you have minimum rest at 11hrs. BUT, before you can leave the aircraft we have to get all passengers off the plane, CLEAN the seats, wait on our shuttle which is probably late if your pilots are sucky human beings and haven’t called ahead to make sure they’re there (Pilots aren’t required to clean; just us lowly peasants). So, by the time you get to the hotel, down to 10hrs. If you get there and rooms are ready, great. IF NOT, another 20-30 min or longer. But, lets say you’re down to 9.5hrs now. Get to your room. Hopefully your key works, air/heat works, no one is already in you room (yes...it happens all the time), room already cleaned, no bed bugs, and you aren’t by a noisy ice machine/elevator. You then have to shower and eat. Let’s say you get all that done in an hour. You now have 8.5 hrs to sleep...BUT WAIT, the van is scheduled to pick you up from the hotel 45 min to an hour before you are supposed to report at the airport and you need to be dressed and ready to make that van. So instead of 8.5hrs, you actually have 7hrs at best to sleep and pop outta bed, get dressed and properly ready to do the shit show all over again; all the while, knowing they are really only paying you for the time you spend on the aircraft, AFTER THE DOOR IS CLOSED AND THE BRAKE IS RELEASED. Time before like boarding, checks, delays? nope...no pay. Just us waisting our fucking time. Literally.

Why, is this? cuz everyone does it is the answer. That is how all airlines do it, so you have no leg to stand on. Got a union, the company retaliates like a reprimanded toddler. Now as I said before, once you get to be a super senior in your company and can choose what you want to work, when you want to work, in the position you want to work, getting $40/hr at base hours and a crazy amount for premium (overtime) hour, etc. the job is GOLDEN. (Unless that company gets purchased/merged.) But for a young person/flight attendant in debt, living in NYC, with a high cost of living, life ain’t fun. I tried living in New Jersey for a lower cost; that came with its own issues. I’ve taken out loans, became a hermit to save money, worked holidays, etc. Dug my hole deeper is what I did. And I’m pretty good at setting goals and managing my time and getting things DONE. But for some fucking reason, life is not working in my favor. This job is not working for me. I see younger people coming up behind me doing LITTLE to no work, getting musical accolades with trash “music” (I know, matter of opinion...but really. C’mon now), young white/latino/asian twinks shaking their ass for anything that breathes and getting rich men to pay their bills or marry them, all the while telling me they just want my BBC or other racist BS like that (Yes, I have receipts) and I’m just like WTF AM I DOING WRONG?! Have I spent my time stupidly? 

And the most recent shit that really hurt my feelings: If any of you remember (to the three of you reading this lol), a few months ago I posted about help getting into bartending. Well, I had actually asked a friend in person before that about bartending and if he knew any directors who could do a music video. This “friend” told me “no, not really”. Didn’t know anything about that, he just does movies and short films (which I’ve donated to his kickstarters for btw...) but no one who he thinks does music videos. THEN, I asked this same “FRIEND” how much he would charge to be IN a music video, as I had a song (the one I won the showcase with) that he would be perfect for as it deals with subject matter he rallies for. I wanted to help his career out in turn by help my video out, because I’m ugly and having beautiful actors in my video would be a better sell (as again, I need this song to make money. He then tells me me, he’s not sure how much he would charge for that. SEVERAL MONTHS LATER...this bitch releases a music VIDEO to his NEW SINGLE about a SIMILAR SUBJECT!! Without promotion, he gets instant 2.2k hits on the video on youtube. MIND YOU, he would always be shy to sing around me and I told him, “you need to give yourself more credit. You have a beautiful voice.” Meanwhile, I’m asking for some knowledge from him, and he wouldn’t help me with ANYTHING. I have NEVER asked for a hand out. Just tell me where the door is, I will get in even if I have to pick the lock. But he not only pretended he didn’t know where the door was, he was holding the keys, had lock picks on the side and duplicates to share; But, for whatever reason...didn’t want to share that with me. Even though, I was going to include him in MY art without any thought and was willing to pay. Now, I have some thoughts on why he did this. But seeing as I’m on the verge of tears, I’ll end on that note.

...You wash away my dreams.”

[eclosesweight]

WOAH IM BACK

Edit: woah thank you everyone for the positive responses. You make my heart full

..

For reals this time.

I’m at the highest weight I’ve been. I gained everything back and more. I haven’t even stepped on the scale because I’m afraid to see it over 250lbs. 

My brother is getting married in October so I really need to hit it hard so I can look cute and finally feel better about myself.

My clothes don’t fit. I freeze everyday because I can barely wear my winter coat and I certainly can’t zip it up.

I don’t care if anyone actually reads this. But if you do, hopefully we can crush this journey together.

...

I’ve made my resolutions for a healthier me.

1. meditate at least once a week. make it a habit. #meditationmonday

2. wake up earlier. read before bed. and go to sleep earlier. (eventually I want the time for myself and/or use it to workout before work)

3. workout consistently at least 3x a week. make it a habit, then add an additional day. Lots of strength and PUSH my limits

4. make healthy food choices. focus meals around veggies. go meatless one day a week. if i’ve been good for a week i get one cheat meal, not a cheat day.

5. menu prep for the week. plan out meals to save money on groceries and make fun healthy meals (i love to cook) (let me know if you want me to share recipes)

6. LOSE 70lbs by October 19th. This may be steep, but even if I lose 15 I will get over this spiral of weight gain.

. . .

This week is strange because of getting over the holidays, so this week I’m slowly easing into my goals.

I’ve made a calendar to mark my progress and keep me on track (i’ll share in a separate post along with my body measurements when I take them)

This morning I woke up late. Getting up is so hard.

Breakfast: Silk Vanilla Almond “yogurt” and peanut butter KIND granola. This was pretty yummy and I’m going to try and incorporate the into my routine. I like having dairy free options. If anyone is still reading. The yogurt tasted just like their vanilla almond mild. 8/10 would try again.

Lunch: leftover sweet potato fajita bake. Last night I made a “fajita bake” with chicken, sweet potato, black beans, spinach, red onion, 5 grain rice blend, a little bit of taco sauce and cheddar cheese. SO GOOD. I’m going to make this again for a meatless meal. 

Before dinner I went to the gym. My apartment complex has a pretty nice one so there’s really no excuse not to go, although I really can’t wait for warm weather so I can go on hikes again. (we got 8.5in of snow on New Years night. fun.) At the gym I warmed up for 20 min doing 2min 5.7mph run, 2min 3mph 7+ incline walk, 1 min 3.5mph walk and REPEAT. That really got me sweating and is a good interval workout for those of you like me who don’t get along with running yet. After my warmup I did some arms: bicep curls, triceps, shoulders, chest. and a little bit on a leg curl machine. I was there for about an hour. I also am considering getting an apple watch so I can track steps and heart rate and calories. 

Dinner: I had some marinated chicken from a local store that I had thawed out so I cooked that in a pan and made a simple caesar salad. I love my caesar salads but I know that it’s basically the worst dressing you can have. I don’t really like vinaigrettes so I’m always nervous to try new dressings.

I don’t normally have dessert but it’s my roommate’s birthday so I made her and I some oreo cheesecake. I made them in muffin tins so I could at least pretend it’s portion controlled. OMG though thy were so yummy. I’ll probably take the leftovers into work though so that they’re out of the house.

Now I’m sitting down for the night. I’m going to journal my 2019 goals so I can see how well I keep up with them through the year. I decided to make a post because last time I actively blogged my workout journey I actually stuck to it and lost about 30lbs! 

So here’s to a happy and healthy new year!

[prettywordsyouleft]

The Sex Contract - Chapter 24

Genre: friends to lovers au / friends with benefits / mature content / romance / angst

Characters: Shim Changmin x Kaia Ashton (OC)

A/N: Due to the overwhelming request I have followed your encouragement to bring back one of my older stories. This was back in a time where OCs were everything and writing one chapter in each main’s point of view was the trend. I hope that even though I have edited this drastically, that you can appreciate this story comes from my older style of writing. I definitely still read this often and find it enjoyable so I hope you will too.

Prologue | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 - FINAL

Chapter 24 – Kaia’s POV.

The buzz was audible before Kaia even entered the office and she gulped, wondering how bad the news was after her disappearance on Saturday evening. She had already seen the photos of Changmin in the Press pit with Abby, but the girl was keeping tight-lipped about the entire ordeal. It made Kaia concerned and with all the noise as she climbed the stairs up to Korea Star, she became nervous as to what her punishment was going to be. Opening the door, Kaia stopped in her tracks once inside, blinking rapidly. The two figures were still there as she refocused and Kaia dropped her takeaway coffee, barely aware that it had emptied over the floor.

“Kaia!” Keith called her name and she snapped out of her reverie. The visitors to the office turned at the sound and Kaia stared at the taller one with an incredulous look. “Are you surprised at our guests to the office? Come and have a look at what we’re working on!”

“Okay,” Kaia said softly, walking slowly over to her desk and placing down her bag. Still shocked, she looked over at the group of staff and shook her head in attempts to clear the cloud forming in her mind.

“You look stunned.” Sungra smirked. “Even I reacted better when I saw them enter the building earlier than you are right now.”

“So I’m not imagining Yunho and Changmin in our office?”

Sungra pinched Kaia’s lower arm and she yelped. “Apparently not.”

“Kai, come over here,” Changmin instructed, moving over to her and grabbing her upper arms. He prodded Kaia over to Abby’s computer and pushed her gently into a free chair. “We have a plan.”

“For what?” Kaia glanced up at him and he pointed at Yunho who seemed quite pleased with himself. “Yunho?”

“Changmin explained the situation to me about Kaori after the concert. He handled it poorly rushing in to grab your friend Abby here, but the three of us were able to get an idea together to remove Kaori from Changmin’s side.”

Kaia blinked slowly and nodded, snapping her focus to the older man. “You’re what?!”

“Changmin was threatened by Kaori regarding you before going on stage. She told him that she had seen you,” Abby explained and Kaia nodded.

“She told me to be careful and that if she caught me around Changmin again, I’d have no future here, but I still don’t understand what you’re up to.”

“It’s rather romantic don’t you think?” Hyurin commented and Kaia glanced at the Korean in bewilderment. “Though you look really confused, Kaia.”

“That’s because I am.”

“We’re creating a semi-false report right now,” Yunho announced triumphantly. “We’re going to explain that Abby here was witness to a conversation between both Changmin and Kaori regarding their fake relationship. Then we’ve also got an inside report from a member of Kaori’s staff stating that the model was using Changmin for her debut as an actress and planned to drop him as soon as she had established her career. Your boss has agreed to contact SME regarding all this and letting them know before running the story.”

“But we won’t be able to, it’s not a real story,” Kaia rebutted, and Abby raised her hand to refute it.

“Yet I’ve been captured in the company of Changmin. It will simply be seen as his attempts to tell me not to run the story.”

“And thus SME will have no option but to cancel the contract of my relations with Kaori Kimura,” Changmin concluded happily.

Kaia nodded and then looked at the men. “But why are you going to such effort, apart from removing the Witch? Don’t you think this is a little dramatic?”

“It’s drama worthy really!” Keith exclaimed and grinned. “The idol who fell in love with his best friend. It would make a really good story!”

“Woah, what?!” Kaia was lucky she was sitting down, her knees instantly becoming incredibly weak.

Changmin coughed awkwardly. “Ah, let’s go talk somewhere, yeah?”

Eventually, Changmin stopped walking and Kaia took a seat in the tiny park, her eyes darting around the area. “Uh, are you sure we should be seen in public like this? I know it’s empty but Min-”

“I couldn’t say what I have to in another setting. It would seem too, well it wouldn’t be right.” Changmin ran a hand through his hair before sitting on the park bench beside her. “Kaia, let’s talk.”

“We are,” she said with a smile, nudging him lightly. “You haven’t been this nervous in front of me since the first night we attempted to have sex.”

“I didn’t expect to revisit that memory,” he admitted with a chuckle and he seemed to relax a little. “Are you okay though?”

“In what way?”

Changmin cringed. Kaia smiled; he had always been so awkward talking about his inner thoughts. “Are you happy with how your life is right now?”

“Without you in it, I’m guessing you meant to add on.” He nodded sheepishly. “I miss you every day but I just can’t be your friend anymore. The contract, well it ruined that.”

“I don’t want to be your friend, Kaia,” he said and Kaia glanced at him, nodding lightly. Her heart began to pound and her face felt hot. She knew she was going to cry, but she tried not to let the tears form just yet. “Being your friend, well I enjoyed the time we spent together, but you’re right things have changed. It took me a while to realise it had.”

“Oh,” Kaia murmured, clamping her eyes closed and trying to settle her emotions. She nodded once. “Well, I’m happy still.”

“You, you are?” She had thrown him off.

“Yeah, Jaewon has become a good person within my life. I don’t see him often but when I do, well we have fun.”

“Oh.”

Everything fell silent then, and Kaia wondered if Changmin would be able to move on now. She hated hurting him, throwing Jaewon in like a cheap shot, but Kaia was struggling just being in his company. There were so many things she wanted to express and the longer she was around Changmin, the harder it was to suppress them.

Changmin’s phone went off and he held it to his ear, looking dejected. “Yeah hyung, I remember our schedule, don’t worry I’ll be back soon.” He ended the call and Kaia got to her feet, smiling lightly at him.

“Well, sounds like you need to go.”

“Yeah.” He got up as well, nodding softly to himself. Kaia rocked back and forth in her sneakers, hoping he’d leave so she could succumb to the feelings rising within her chest. He stepped away and then stopped, surprising her a little. Kaia had to sniff back the beginning of her tears, blinking the emotion away as fast as she could. Changmin turned back to face her, his dark eyes searching hers for an answer. He then swiftly moved in front of Kaia, grabbing her jaw in his hands. “I have to do this.”

His lips pressed against hers passionately and for a moment Kaia was too stunned to react. As they caressed her mouth she snapped out of it, sliding her arms around his neck and kissing him back. The tears began to fall from Kaia’s eyes, wondering why she was allowing herself to have this last embrace. Eventually, Kaia found the willpower to pull away, covering her mouth with her hand and trying to settle her crying.

Changmin sighed. “I’m not sorry for kissing you. In fact, if I could, I would kiss you over and over. But that’s selfish of me to push my feelings onto you when you don’t want the same thing.”

“What?” Kaia snapped her eyes back to his face and shook her head. “What did you say?”

“Kai, why do you think we’re taking time out of our busy schedule right now constructing my escape from Kaori? I don’t want her coming after you. I don’t want to lose you because of her. I’ve already lost you because I was too blind to see I had fallen in love with you! But there was no way-”

“You, you love me?” Kaia breathed and Changmin’s cheeks flushed with colour. “You actually love me?”

“You said, in the beginning, these kinds of arrangements usually went one of two ways. The pair either split up wanting more from the world or fall in love, remember?” Kaia nodded. Changmin smiled and brushed her curls away gently. “I fell in love with you. I’ve been in love with you for weeks now. I just did-”

She cut him off with her lips, kissing him with demand. Changmin managed to balance Kaia’s attack, gripping her body hard within his arms and meeting her hunger completely. They kissed until breathless and then he leant his forehead against hers.

“I love you too.”

“I think that was apparent by the way you just leapt on me.” He chuckled. “Yunho told me you must have left because I was too blind to see you were in love with me too, but I didn’t believe you did; I thought I had done something to make you hate me.”

“It became too hard to bear the weight of my feelings around you,” Kaia confessed and Changmin laughed. She pouted, and then let out a whine. “Why are you laughing?!”

“Because we are complete idiots, just like Yunho has been telling us all along.”

Kaia rolled her eyes but smiled all the same. “It took you forever to figure it out. You’re more of an idiot than me!”

“Oh really? Why did you just think right now that I didn’t want anything to do with you?” He smirked and Kaia pouted again. Laughing, he pulled her against his chest and held her close. “It doesn’t matter now. I have you in my arms, and I’m not letting you go.”

Kaia snuggled into the embrace, closing her eyes and smiled happily. She didn’t want to let go either.

_________________

Part 25

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[alleiradayne]

SPN MinnCon Day 3

You know what, I’m pulling the I-just-gave-birth-to-a-tiny-helpless-human card. That’s why I didn’t get back to this sooner. Also my mom and aunt were in town helping out a ton but it also kept me away from Tumblr most days.

So. MinnCon Day 3. This day was the day for me. I had been looking forward to the whole weekend for months. But truly, this day was something that I had been freaking out about for about two weeks for two reasons. 1.) Jared Photo Op. 2) Jared 30 Minute Meet and Greet.

I’ll preface this with the fact that I am a dyed-in-the-wool Jared/Sam stan. I cannot get enough of him and his smile and his sense of humor and his hair and his compassion and his empathy and his brain and his eyes. Okay, yeah, I love the 6′4″ mansuit he inhabits, too.

When you read this, you’re going to see a lot of Jared. A decent bit of Jensen, too (I took a lot of pictures of him). But I’ll be writing a lot more about Jared. Except for the meet and greets. Which... ugh, I wish I could tell you guys about his 30 minute meet and greet as well as his 10 minute for VIP. But I can’t. :(

Buckle up bitches, this shits long...

It was the first picture I took.

The day started out with the Gold Panel. If you haven’t seen it yet, my fellow VIP’er, Sue, gave Jared a thing of cupcakes when he called on her for a question and she didn’t have one ready. So she asked him if he wanted a cupcake. There’s rules about giving them food; I guess they’re not supposed to take it, but Jared was like, “Uh shit yeah I want a cupcake.”

He was only supposed to take one for each of them. But I don’t think he could hear her very well. So he took the whole thing. I was supposed to eat one of those fucking cupcakes.

And then:

CUPCAKEPOCALYPSE

It went on for several minutes. Jared dropped the cupcakes (THAT I WAS SUPPOSED TO EAT) and made a giant mess. A creation staff person came out to help, a fan offered baby wipes, and Jensen had to help clean Jared’s face.

“Help a brother out, man.”

“You are beyond help.”

Brothers. I swear.

Questions were fun and it was during this panel that I could tell that the day would be distinctly different from previous con’s Sundays. We all know Jared is quite a bit more talkative than Jensen. But today, that would not be the case. Someone put a quarter in Jensen...

He’s so pretty.

Again, I’m not sure what someone said (I know I could go watch the video but, time) but Jensen busted out the imaginary popcorn.

And then there were more wonderful pictures of Jared.

See. Lots of Jared.

If you want to see ALL of the pictures I took (and edited) from the entire weekend:

GO HERE

The flicker album will be available until flickr decides to get rid of free accounts or whatever nonsense Yahoo wants to do with flickr.

After the gold panel I had Jared’s 30 minute meet and greet and his photo op. I was hoping that by waiting to post this, I’d have my .jpg from Chris, but I don’t.  The meet and greet was fantastic. There were 20 people in that session, and we drew numbers for seats. I got number 6 which ended up being right in the middle of the front row. I don’t know how I got so fucking lucky...

I got to ask my very weird question and got a very cogent and incredibly self-aware answer that kind of blew me away. And we even had time to sneak in my follow-up, which also resulted in another ridiculously self-aware response. And he remembered these questions because he later brought the topic up again at the 10 minute VIP.

Now the photo op. I’m pretty sure this interaction tops the entire weekend (just sneaking past his autograph and getting a smooch from Rob Benedict). Remember the fact that I’m 37 weeks pregnant. I had no clue what the hell to do for this photo op. I was wearing my self-made maternity “Love Yourself First” t-shirt, all black, with red/black buffalo plaid. I don’t know if it was entirely obvious that I was pregnant as I walked up to Jared for my op.

The VIP folks with his op got to go first. I opted, out of the four of us with his op, to go last. I walked up as Bang A Gong (Get It On) played, and whenever there is music playing, I cannot help but dance a bit. So my dumbass does my white-girl shimmy up to him and he laughed as he did his own short dance, but then proceeded to damn near do the splits to take the picture. I’m 5′4″. He’s 6′4″. I definitely didn’t want to take a picture with my face at his sternum. He knew that.

But other than that I didn’t know what to do. So I told him that. Here’s the conversation:

“Hey. I really don’t know what to do because she’s in the way,” I said as I pointed at my very-much-in-the-way-pregnant-stomach.

Jared’s eyes popped when he looked and then immediately started rubbing my stomach. Now normally, I would not have been okay with some rando touching my pregnant stomach without asking.

Jared Padalecki is not some rando. And he asked, “How far along are you?”

I laughed as I said, “I’m due in three weeks.”

If I thought his eyes popped before, they damn near fell out of his head at that. He replied, “Holy shit, how the fuck are you on your feet?! That is so badass, I can’t believe you’re here!” He held up his hand for a high-five, which I did, and he grabbed my hand to hold on to it. He then asked me my name. I told him and mentioned I’d been to the con last year with my sister and she was sad she couldn’t make it this year. And he then said, “Jeanna, awesome, I’m so sorry your sister couldn’t be here. But, how are you feeling? Do you need anything?” I told him I was great and that I’d been looking forward to this for months even though I’m huge and was really nervous about this photo op.

He then pulled me into him, wrapped his arms around me (like he does for most of his ops) and we took the picture. With his arms still around me, he looked me in the eye and said, “It was wonderful to meet you again. I am so glad you are here and that you’re doing so well. Is this your first?”

“Yup.”

“I am so happy for you, that’s awesome. I remember Gen had the pregnancy glow, you look absolutely stunning, you’re rockin’ it hard. Thank you again for being here. I’ll see you again later in VIP.”

I thanked him and hugged him once more and he kissed the top of my god damn head.

And then I left the photo op room. As I was walking out of the room, a fellow VIP’er was waiting for me and saw me walking out. I think I had the worst dead-eyes face on because she said, “What happened?! Did something go wrong with your op?!”

And I said, “No. It was amazing I’m fucking speechless and don’t know what to do. I feel like I’m forgetting something. I... don’t know what to do all of a sudden.”

“Breathe, honey. You’re forgetting to breathe.”

You’re god damn right I was forgetting to breathe. I mean, this just happened:

I couldn’t have asked for a better photo.

Moving on...

Next was Mark Pellegrino’s panel which was stellar. I love him.

Rob came out eventually and was giving Mark the Dad stare. I kinda wish Rob would look at me like that... eh, @atc74?

And then there was some funny God and His Children interactions.

Such a stellar cast.

And then there was the Jensen and Jared main panel.

Guys. Gals. There are so many fucking pictures I took. Here’s a random sampling:

It was an amazing panel. Like I said someone put a quarter in Jensen and he was just on point this year. Compared to other cons and videos I’ve watched, he really came out of his shell at this event and put on an amazing show with Jared. I absolutely recommend watching all the videos from this convention because they are so worth it.

After the main panel was Mark’s, Jensen’s, and Jared’s 10 minute VIP meet and greets. Holy shit were they great. Again, can’t really talk about them, but I got to sit next to Jared and he doesn’t understand personal space. I’ll leave it at that.

The night ended with autographs. I hit up Jared’s first, which in hindsight wish I’d done last but oh well. I hopped in line and when he saw me he said, “Remind me how long you’ve got?” as he reached out and touched my stomach again. I told him it was three weeks out and he smiled and shook his head as he said, “Damn, you are a fucking trooper. Congratulations again. Keep kickin’ ass.” He signed the photo, thanked me, and I thanked him. Right as I stepped away, he said, “You tweet that baby’s picture right away! I wanna see her face!”

I did tweet a picture, but I don’t think he saw it. That’s okay, I didn’t really think he would.

Jensen was next, who I had sign my J2 op from the previous year with my sister. While signing, his mala bead bracelet got stuck on the table cloth. My first thought was to say, “What did you do, Ray?” in my best Winston impression. And Jensen didn’t miss a beat. “I couldn’t help it. It just popped in there...”

Thanks for knowing your Ghostbusters references, Jensen.

Last but not least was Misha. Aside from his 10-min meet and greet, I’d never really interacted with him. There was a short wait for him as he finished up his Castiel photo ops. My VIP liaison and I were waiting together because she had an op for his auto too. And then he arrived, got settled and waved us over. I had him sign the first op my sister and I ever got from 2016 with Misha and Mark Sheppard. Mark had signed it last year.

And Misha remembered from VIP on Saturday that I was pregnant and asked me about it. When I told him it was a girl, he said, “Oh yeah, you’re gonna love it, it’s stupidly fun. Picked a name yet?” and I told him we decided on Elizabeth. His response was, “How cool, my sister’s name is Elizabeth. You have fun with that baby and don’t listen to anyone. Follow your gut. Science, too. But trust yourself. You got this.”

And then we were done. I went back to the VIP room, helped clean up a bit, gathered my stuff, and headed for my car. The second I walked out of the room, I started crying because... it was over. Everything was done, all the things I’d been looking forward to for months were... done. Just like that, in the blink of an eye, the weekend was behind me.

I’m still not over it. I’m waiting for the next opportunity to meet them all again. I called my sister in that moment of sudden sadness and told her that we absolutely had to do VIP together at Chicago, or hope they come back to Minneapolis soon. I can’t imagine doing a con without VIP again.

And the weekend wouldn’t have been what it was without all the people I met and new friends I made. You’re all wonderful and amazing and I can’t thank you enough for how welcoming you all were.

I hope you all enjoyed reading these. I think I’ll put a master post together to link to all three parts/days and add a link to the flickr album there as well. Thanks again for reading!

[am-molloy]

20 Facts About Me: A.M. Molloy

Hello everyone! Welcome back (or to) my blog.

Today I thought I would share with you all 15 random facts that you may or may not know about me. These factoids may not have to with my writing life, but they’ll help you understand who I am as a person. So! Let’s take a dive into my life.

If you didn't know this already, I have a cat named Sorren. She is my soul-kitty and the love of my life. We’ve barely been apart the 11 years she’s been in my life. I wasn’t going to accept any job abroad unless I could bring her.

I love to travel. In fact, my first big travel was to a summer camp in China when I was 15, way back in 2004.

So far, I’ve been to (in order), China, America, Japan ( x3 ), Korea, (x3 ), Belgium, Germany, Spain, Portugal, Hong Kong, and Thailand. Being Canadian, I’ve obviously been to Canada, though I haven’t travelled as much within my own country. I do plan on visiting more countries soon, but for now, I’m planning another return visit to Japan for my upcoming summer vacation.

I am a 2nd-degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do, although it’s been a few years since I practiced due to financial issues. I would love to practice again, especially as I live in Korea now, but now is not the right time for me. I still have all my equipment and remember most of my forms so perhaps someday!

Side note, back in the day when I did practice, I used to go to competitions and would usually win first or second place. Usually first for forms and second for sparing. I rarely got lower and if I did it was for sparing. Forms were my strong suit.

I used to be an animator. I went to an art school studying animation and graphics and working in my field after graduation. Though if I’m being honest, I was never the best at animation. Still, art was more my thing. So when I worked for Contendo, I eventually gravitated towards mostly audio work and eventually becoming their Senior Audio Editor. I still do art, but it’s now for fun rather work. And let’s be honest, the art I did for Contendo isn’t what you would have expected me to be doing. At Contendo we made training videos for oil and gas companies.

Below is my super old demo reel, and I have improved since 2009 But this is to just show you what I used to do. I was by far the best but I enjoyed doing it all the same.

Note: The video is from my old YouTube channel from college. I do not use that channel anymore. If you want to see more up to date videos and life in Korea, check out my actual YouTube channel: Canadian Abroad: A.M. Molloy.

I have a total of 11 tattoos! (So far). Below is a slideshow from my very first tattoo (the tribal dragon when I was 17) to my latest, number eleven done this year in Korea (Sorren).

I am fluent in English, French, Spanish and I can speak intermediate Japanese (taught myself) and beginner Korean (also teaching myself).

My dad is French (from Quebec) so I learned English and French growing up in my household. I majored in Spanish at university and spent a semester in Spain as an exchange student.

I used to do a lot of cosplay, but I haven’t done so in years. I haven’t cosplayed very much and I reused the same cosplay for many cons (and halloween costumes) but I still enjoyed doing it all the same. I can’t sew so I always had help making them. I still appreciate a good cosplay from other cosplayers.

I love photography, though I’m still learning. I’m far from good but I’m getting better every day. I mostly take iPhone photography shots because I don’t always lug around my Nikon D3200. Honestly, with a bit of practice, anyone can make iPhone pictures turn out great. Featured below are a few of my favourite shots taken with my iPhone 8.

I have a wall of all my shots but my favourite will always be of my best friend, Leila, holding the Polaroid picture I just took of her. The picture of her holding the picture (INCEPTION) was also another iPhone shot.

I made my own language/culture because reasons. Mostly RP though. The language is called Hikaran and is spoken by a race on the planet Spira. I go into full length on said language and people in a previous blog post, so please, go ahead and check it out!

Admittedly, I made most of this up during math class in high school. It’s safe to say I’m not very good at math.

Anyway, instead of going into full detail here (because it’s in the blog post), I’ll just leave this popular Hikaran saying here:

While on exchange to Spain back in the summer of 2016, I met and shook hands with the queen of Spain in what I call a happy accident. One day I was walking around my school and taking a stroll around town and I noticed a blocked road a crowd starting to form where there usually isn’t. So, naturally, I had to get up front to see what was going to happen. Turns out the queen of Spain was in town and she took time to shake hands with people and I got lucky enough to be one of them. Moral of the story: when you see a tent or a barricade and people starting to gather where there usually isn’t, get up front because awesome things are gonna happen.  Unfortunately, I don’t have a picture with her, but I do, however, have a picture of her. (Pictured above).

Back in high school, when it was time for graduation photos, we were told we could bring an item, like a soccer ball or baseball bat, if we wanted for our pictures. Being the cat-obsessed weird person that I am, I legit brought my cat, Marbles (AKA Mibs) in a duffle bag (it was open) to school for my picture. Needless to say, I was the talk of the school for bringing a cat haha.  I lived super close to my school so I took my picture and brought her straight home. She hated going to school but was a good girl and took an amazing picture. 

I’m a huge Harry Potter fan. Literally grew up with it. I was in the 6th grade reading the first three books because that’s all that was published at the time. When the first Harry Potter movie came out, I’ll never forget the experience. It was amazing and I loved every bit of it.

PS: I’m a proud Gryffindor. I also have many friends from all of the houses, but most of them are from Slytherin.

I grew with Pokemon. I was around when it was all first released and Pokemon Red was my first ever game I owned to go with the first ever consul I opened, Nintendo Colour. I buy every game, still collect cards, and I used to watch the anime. Pokemon will always have a special place in my heart.

My new all time favourite game is Life is Strange all other games in said franchise. THAT GAME IS MY LIFE, YO. I mean, if you noticed on fact number 5 that one of my tattoos is Life is Strange themed.

My favourite author is Rachel Vincent.

Literally, anything she writes is golden to me.

My favourite series of hers will always be the Soul Screamers series. I still can’t believe how she ended that series. Love it! I just get so invested in each world that she creates that I feel like I’m right there with the characters and I don’t know what to do with my life when I finish each book.

If you love reading, I highly recommend checking her out.

The origin of my author name: A.M. Molloy is basically the initials to my given name, Alex Molloy. However, in person, I prefer to be called Mina. Mina is my Korean name and to be honest, I was never fond of Alex. Since I live in Korea, everyone here calls me Mina. It makes me happy to hear people call me Mina. :3

My novel is in its third round of edits and beta reader stage. One of my beta readers created SOUTH’s very first meme! I’m so in love with it that I’m sharing it here.

So, my university had this mini ball pit kept in the student center. Once during a society meeting at my university, my friend and I decided to completely organize the ball pit into a rainbow. It literally took us forty-five mins straight but we did it! And then no one wanted to sit in the ball bit for like a week because they didn’t want to mess it up so we had to mess it up again so people would use it again.

During my second visit to Japan, I had the pleasure to meet a real sumo wrestler. It was an honour. I wish I could have seen an actual match but this was still awesome all the same.

I loved volunteering at my university for many things, but my favourite was being an NSO Leader. My last year at uni I had the privilege to be on the best team, Yellow Team, and had the most amazing crew. It was truly the best experience. I loved helping all the newcomers to UPEI and I would do it again in a heartbeat if I was still in school.

Well, you’ve made it this far! Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed learning a bit more about me. For now, this concludes my new post, 20 facts about me.

Take care.

— Mina (A.M. Molloy)

[ladysophiebeckett]

why did you call osha on a theatre once? (if u dont mind telling the story)

@boredzoi

okay so i dont do theater anymore (tho nostalgia says i miss it). this, ‘company’ was looking for a stage manager last minute and an instructor (who is also a chair of this ‘company’ recommended me and got me in touch the director, we’ll call her ‘wendy’. 

wendy said she had an sm ready to go but bc of personal reasons the sm had to drop the job. this particular show was supposed to open in 3 weeks. so i would be coming mid rehearsals. i was told i would be getting paid $300, under the table. rehearsals were 3 days a week and then tech week(end) and i was told that the show was one weekend only. 3 days. fri, sat, sun. 

i really wanted to do theater again and this was considered community theater but the ‘company’ was also like an afterschool  theater educational thing. they offered voice lessons and whatnot. the cast consisted of a lot of either senior’s in high school or first year college students. and community theater actors that were basically doing gigs and this was particular show as a gig to them. (fancy way of saying a couple of these actor were Older). 

my version of community theater was basically educational theater where i was taught, what i believe is, the right way of doing things. i worked with organized people. 

when i got to this theater—if you work in community theater, anything can be theater so long as u got some chairs and like, a z-rack and one maybe one flat–this was place i get to is a death trap. it’s an old warehouse by the train tracks and the place next door teaches boxing so you’d hear a lot of bags being hit. the bathroom was up a flight of stairs to an unfinished second floor. when i say unfinished i mean like–it’s just wood and then debris. the bathroom faces the freeway and it was a toilet (clean tho) and sink was barely a sink. the floor–completely unfinished\gutted. it looked like when you’re renovating an old house and you have to gut it to its bare bones. 

there’s cables everywhere. a hazard. anybody could have tripped at any time. no dressing rooms. one little office for the girls to share. the guys changed anywhere. backstage was also where the props where. so anywhere and everywhere. no designated sitting area. before u hit the flight of stairs to the bathroom, its another unfinished section—fabric everywhere, z-racks with costumes with no actual logical order. everything is a fire hazard. no bathroom for handicapped ppl, unless they could climb that flight of stairs. 

did i mention the only way to get to the bathroom was by going through the ‘backstage’?? so youd have audience members using the restroom during the show or at intermission there’d be a line by the stairs as actors are also at intermission or changing or getting ready for their scene. 

and this is just the one theater–i was not told that if the show did well they were gonna transfer it for one night only to another city at an actual real  theater and that i was going to have to help load the show. i was not told this was going to be some mature bus and truck show. so i had to help load the platforms on to a uhaul on some saturday morning. and my sister drive me the 20 min to another time even tho to get the town A was already 40 min. and unload again once we got to the actual not hazardous theater. 

i was not told i would have to do any of this. i was told 3 weeks and one weekend of shows. and im not even getting into how disorganized the actual rehearsal process was and how wendy is would give me an order and not like how i did it, so i was constantly being undermined despite the fact that i had good stage managing experience and had never had a problem with directors when working under educational theater.

but i did as i was told bc i had already committed to this gig and i couldnt make my prior instructor who recommended me for this, look bad. BUT bc i didnt know about all loading and unloading, ect. once the show was over at this actual theater, we had to load again. which i did. but i did go back with the ‘crew’ to unload bc my sister was my ride and she had other things to do, so i helped load up and then excused myself bc of personal reasons. 

wendy didn’t like that but also didn’t stop me from leaving. wendy went on fb (there was a fb group. thats another story) and took pics of the unloading and said something like ‘thanks to those who stayed’ insinuating that i should have stayed. 

later that week i wrote to wendy and said ‘hey when am i gonna get paid?’ and then she said she would not be paying the promised amount bc i was not ‘seasoned’ enough–that i did not participate in the last unloading, that i was a beginner and that other ppl–my asm who was an idiot and had no prior theater experience and most unhelpful–had to do things to and that the money should be split. she was offering to pay me 215 or whatever. Bc i put myself in this very uncomfortable position of working with someone that was also friends with my instructor, i felt defenseless. My sister tired to write in for me and calculated a different number to negotiate, she sent that in for me and Wendy didn’t like that ect. Listed other ways that I sucked and I didn’t respond, bc of said uncomfortable situation. she messaged days later asking if i received a check,  i did not. she never ever sent me anything. 

bc i was upset and feeling defenseless about the situation and letting down said instructor and wendy probably most likely talking shit to my ex instructor about me, my sister and i called OSHA about the train track warehouse and all its safety violations. I then had my sister personally message the company that held the rights to the musical bc i firmly believe that Wendy did not buy the rights do that particular show based on she promoted it and bc i looked online and wendy’s ‘company’ was not listed under the companies that were producing this show at that particular time. 

edit: i dont know if they faced any consequences. unfortunately.  

yes, this experience is what ended my relationship with community theater and why i stopped looking for gigs.