#once again I will direct u to the notes of the other post bc everyone is incredibly creative and cool :D
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sardonic-sprite · 2 years ago
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I'm Back!
Wow, so Lent is over now, so my tumblr fast is also over and I'm still a little in shock, lol. I had hoped the past six weeks? I don't know, Time is weird, would be more productive but at least I got SOME stuff written/posted. Anyway, I have one more month of school and then fucking FINALS so expect sporadic updates at idiot-o-clock hours of the night, and maybe yell at me to sleep, eat, study, or drink water whenever i do post 😅
I am up to SO EFFING MANY wips rn on so many different fronts you guys have no freaking idea 😭 so here's a status report for EVERYTHING on or going on sardonic_sprite. (Its gonna be a monster post, y'all, bear with me)
in absolutely no particular order:
Wayne4Ham: We have a LONG way to go with this one, so just be patient and I'll slowly but steadily plug on through. Aaron Burr, Sir, should theoretically take me no longer than end of april
Wayne-Crazy: there's like 4 specific requests on it, plus a few 'series' i started, but after those, say 6-7, i'll probably mark as complete and only re-open if someone offers me an idea
Batman Beginners: i'll tell y'all up front, this one will take me forever. i don't even know what all I intend to cover, but know that i'm halfway done with the DITF arc, and it'll probably come out in the next two months
Just A Kid: this was my shits-and-giggles fic that got like 3000 notes in a weekend lmao. it's something i do intend to continue bc its so fun and i enjoy the concepts in it, but i don't have plans to actively write more of it in the immediate future.
Rev Wayne: just gave y'all Jason's fic, so the next probably won't come until late in summer, extrapolating from my few data points. if anyone has ideas for timmy's intro, let me know, i'd love some inspiration
Celeb Batwaynes: reported separate from wayne-crazy for reasons. i think theres like 12 specific requests plus 2 ideas of my own. i may put out a poll for the next one to write, but not until after school's out, because these fics are HUGE time-eaters for me. speaking of, are non-tumblr-users able to vote on polls?
Welcome to Gotham U: this was again, me doing shit bc why not. will probably add more in the style that i first posted, but i doubt i will write any prose for it. if you would like to give it a try, please reach out, i'd love to see what you write!
One Diamond: every time i touch this i make the cliffhanger worse lmao. i finally do have a direction, but execution is gonna have to wait a while.
The Young, Innocent, and Righteous: this is mostly just for me anyway, but i'm just gonna say that i'm waiting until i finish watching miraculous season 5 before i go any further
AS you wish: i have 5 more requests to do and i am so sorry to everyone waiting you do not deserve this lmao. i promise im trying, i love your ideas, it just takes me a really long time to fill in the rest and then actually write it. the next one on my list is particularly hard to pin down and so it's halting the ones behind it to. if not before, then after finals i will sit and bang my head on the keyboard until something good comes out
Light Isn't Fadin': soooooo many people have asked me about this one oof. SOMEDAY, i swear. right now its a huge, nebulous, hulking monster and im sorry it's just not happening yet.
A christmas carol: wait until december. please
Father's Day: june.
A Little Problem: over the summer, i will watch marvel movies until they once again hijack my brain and fuel this to completion. maybe.
easter eggs: how the fuck did i forget this lmao. i'm doing as much as i can in april, but when the month is done, i'm sorry, we'll all be waiting until next lenten season. hopefully it won't come to that.
aaaaand i THINK that's finally it. there's also a bunch of random paragraphs in word and google docs that may appear, not to mention ideas that kidnap me in dark alleys. but i also have like a good half dozen other wips for other places that im trying to attend to, so please be forgiving if it seems like its taking a while to post something as sprite.
as always, i love questions, comments, concerns, even some complaints, so feel free to interact.
See ya when I see ya!
sprite
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itoshi-s · 2 years ago
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You are such a fantastic writer and blue lock fan!! ty so much for sharing your headcanons and thoughts about the boys!!! I highspeed ran through the anime and manga in a week lmao and have been obsessing over the fan content and you have been one of my favorite blogs <333 I don't have anyone to talk blue lock so I wanted to drop in and mention a dream I had if that's okay??
It was so stupid but it was inspired by that reader insert basis of being a manager in training for the boys but instead in my dream I was training to be a sport announcer for some reason?? So I was watching in real time the matches of team Z vs others and later Isagi's teams and plays against Rin and such and making commentary like 'ANOTHER FLAWLESS NUTMEG PASS DEFENSE AND OH! OHHH!!! EVERYONE STAND BACK BACHIRA IS ONCE AGAIN TURNING THIS COURT INTO A DANCE FLOOR. THE BEAT IS DROPPING AS HIS ENEMIES DO, TOO!!" or "YES A DIRECT SHOT BY THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGENDDDDDD ISAGI YOICHIIIIIII!!!" it was wild but not too biased bc I was properly losing my mind over both sides of the match when something impressive happened. But I remember it being such whiplash to a lot of bllk boys bc I have a petite, curvy, and cute appearance but had the heart and roar of a crazy American announcer during games lmao
but honestly?? Aside from Ego needing more creativity for training sims (soccer boys vs holographic zombies WHEN) bc if he's gonna have that much money and tech and ruin these guys' lives let them have some fun in a interactive/simulation, their soccer feats absolutely deserve hype men. Is there anything you wish the manga added, out of curiosity?? I saw a post point this out, but I also wish the (vastly superior!!) female Japanese soccer team is mentioned at some point. Ty for letting me share/reading this btw!! Have a great new year!!
AAAAH nonnie this is so late but PLEASE you're so sweet !! <///3 i am sOOO happi u enjoy my content &&all the silly brainrot asjflksa cmere and let me give u a kiss ! >_<
this dream sounds so fun ajhsklh and you are SO right for that !!!!!!1 you slayed that job getting all hyped.. as you should :3 ! these boys def need a hype man AND an announcer too......... it would be so funny to hear what they'd have to say about some of these games 😭
i'd LOVE to see some more casual scenes like the one they had in shibuya :( like ??!#! that was giving me LIFE i hope we get another chapter or two like that soon ! something else i'd love if they added would be some psychological help 4 these boys LOL but that's just ur psych zari speaking :3 on a serious note it'd REALLY be interesting 2 see how these boys handle being isolated and tired out at the facility for so long tho,, taking breaks w school too ?????? idk if it makes sense but i'd just rly like to see what are the possible consequences to them always being on their 100% and having their usual teenage lives ripped away from them :o do they ever get back in school? do they have any issues w that? is there any mental health professional in the bllk facility in case someone needs help????? i hope there is lol
i agree on the female team sm too !!!!! that'd be absolutely amazing :3 in fact i'm very surprised it wasn't mentioned at all but welp that's football for u i guess we girls never get recognition yet alone in a male dominated space q_q
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lilyvines · 3 years ago
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Hi, can we get a bit more info on the Mundane(protagonist tommy and magic something everybody else au)? Like plotpoint, meetings? Im trying to bully myself into writing a fic
absolutely!! i would love it if you wrote a fic :D
also tons of people put cool ideas too so if you ever want more inspiration you can always look in the notes of the post!!
-Phil is a literal angel. like wings and everything. he doesn’t even hide them, but every single day, Tommy makes a joke about how Phil is a furry
- continuing with that, since I believe in death!kristin propaganda, Kristin is a goddess. Phil is an angel. Wilbur is a supernatural creature. Dream is a supernatural hunter. It makes dinner with dream incredibly tense, but Tommy is oblivious. Technoblade is just chilling
-Tommy: after dinner, Wilbur can sing us a song!
Dream, narrowing his eyes: what kind of song?
Wilbur, who probably has magic voice powers or smth idk: the kind you’ll never want to stop listening to (:
Tommy: omg wil can u play soft boy :D :D
-obviously Wilbur Phil or Kristin never actually fight with dream, it would make Tommy upset. So instead they’re just incredibly passive aggressive with each other
- there’s running theories within the magical underworld about what Tommy is to have attracted this much Crazy. Some people think gang leader. Some people think he’s some kind of magnet for the powerful. truthfully he’s just kinda Dumb
- a while ago, someone from one of the other’s Secret Lives tried to kill Tommy. Obviously they didn’t succeed, and Tommy didn’t even notice (bonus points if he completely accidentally evaded them and their attempts). But ever since then, everyone came together and decided to have someone stay with Tommy at all times. He hasn’t even noticed he has a guard, he just calls them clingy
- everyone else in like. the world knows gnf is actually [insert secret popstar name here] they just haven’t mentioned it out of politeness. Tommy on the other hand just genuinely has not noticed. George thinks that he’s an illusive master of disguise and is great at keeping his secret identity (he is not)
- there are 2 betting pools that end up getting set up amongst their friends. 1 that says whether or not Tommy knows or not. When it is eventually realized that he does not know, they set up a betting pool for when he’ll find out.
- technoblade bets a large sum of money it will happen soon, and since he doesn’t make a habit of losing, he dyes his hair bright pink to look like his magical girl counterpart. Tommy says that it looks good, and notices nothing else. Technoblade’s attempts continue to ramp up in ridiculousness until he comes out wearing a literal sailor moon outfit and a sign that says ‘I AM A MAGICAL GIRL’
- Tommy does not realize
- at one point, Tommy sees dream’s collection of super dangerous monster hunting stuff (I always think of dream as like a Winchester style hunter but u can adapt it ofc) and he just goes ‘wow dream you have a lot of guns. It’s the American in you, huh’
- he sees all of dream’s demon fighting stuff and goes ‘huh. Never knew you were catholic.’
- Tommy gets invited to tubbo’s giant lab where he develops his nukes and things. Instead of making the connection that his bestie is a mad scientist he just goes ‘wow tubbo you never told me you made props for a living.’ He then proceeds to get incredibly distracted by something completely unrelated to the nukes and forgets he’s in a giant lab
- I am a big supporter of adopted Tommy so I like to think he’s just a random kid they found on the street and since Phil tends to adopt any child shaped object that looks at him, he just like came home. Originally sbi had this hard time deciding whether or not to hide their secrets before going ‘it would be too hard to hide, we should just leave it out in the open instead and he’ll just figure it out’
- he did not, in fact, figure it out
- most of the supernatural underworld just does not understand Tommy, they all think something is like up with him, so they mostly don’t bother him. But every now and then he’ll get lost or something and a remarkably intelligent crow will show him the way home
- Tommy comes home and is like ‘I followed a crow home!’ And Phil thinks he’s gonna figure it out. In reality, Tommy just thinks there’s a crows nest in their house. He’s very excited
- since there are no birds in their house, he gets sad. Cue the rush from all of these incredibly cool and powerful people as they scramble to get some birds in the rafters. Tubbo builds some fake ones. Ranboo buys an industrial sized bag of bird seed. Wilbur tries to use his voice to charm them. dream and techno pour over spells and magic that would attract birds. Phil asks every bird in 40 miles to come live with him.
- eventually gnf shows up with a bunch of birds in a box. They come to him. He’s a Disney princess. He’s georgenotfound
- the birds make Tommy very happy. All is right within the world
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quokkacore · 4 years ago
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can you dig it? (m) [kim doyoung & kim jungwoo]
summary: post concert highs can be a real bummer, and tonight, after a particularly intense performance, your boyfriends help you come down.
pairing: kim doyoung x kim jungwoo x fem!reader
genre: poly!au, 70s!au, band!au, smut, fluff
warnings: drug usage (weed specifically), mentions of other substances (lsd and cocaine), shotgunning, established poly relationship, soft dom jungwoo, mentioned switch jungwoo, hard dom doyoung, sub reader, high sex, sex on a water bed!!, unprotected sex, spit kink, they're all so sweaty help, mxm, degradation kink, praise kink, orgasm denial, overstimulation, minor possessiveness
song recs: don’t stop - fleetwood mac // unlock it (feat. kim petras & jay park) - charli xcx // love her madly - the doors // ziggy stardust - david bowie // rhiannon - fleetwood mac // eclipse - kim lip (loona) // flick of the wrist - queen
word count: 5.4k
a/n: this is for my best friend, who i love with all my heart,bc last month we were talking abt the dowoo photoshoot and she said smth about high sex with dowoo. happy birthday queen <3 thank u for listening to me complain abt writing all the time :’)
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masterlist
Friday, July 22rd, 1977
The concert hall smelled like cocaine and sweat, you noted to yourself as the three of you joined hands to bow. Cheers from the crowd bounced off of the walls as you bid them your final goodbye, wishing them a good night and telling them to drive safe. Still, their chanting persisted. "Seoul Motel! Seoul Motel! Seoul Motel!" 
You wondered vaguely if this was what it was like to be a young god.
The curtain lowered, and the three of you were ushered offstage, to take some pictures and then head back to the hotel, to try and get some rest before you were off to Philadelphia, some five or so hours from where you were now: Boston. 
Truthfully, everything passed in a blur. It was almost always like this after these concerts. The thrill and euphoria of performing made it difficult to focus on things. That might have also been because Jungwoo had passed you a joint before the concert. You couldn't be completely sure.
Your tambourine and guitar seemingly disappeared, but you knew it would show up tomorrow for soundcheck when you got to the Philadelphia venue, right along with Jungwoo's bass guitar and Doyoung's drum kit.
What you did know was that here, in the car back to the hotel that your manager was driving, lecturing you and Jungwoo about the importance of being sober when talking to reporters, Doyoung had a hand on your thigh, and that was all you could focus on. 
Doyoung was high too. You knew this because ten minutes before you were needed on stage he pulled you forward by the hips and told you to take a few hits from the hand rolled joint and blow the smoke into his mouth. Of course, he wasn't as high as you and Jungwoo were, and he knew how to hide it better. But if you were to get close enough you'd notice the redness rimming his eyes, the dilation of his pupils.
The three of you were something, that was for sure. You had been, probably ever since Jungwoo joined the band, some eight years ago, in the fall of '69. You only really defined what you were once you got your first big hit thanks to some disc jockey in LA playing a song you had written, Calabasas, on the radio back in '73. 
The song had blown up, and suddenly the three of you were whisked into a whirlwind of celebrities, drugs, paparazzi and producers who thought the three of you were born yesterday. Yes, you were college kids that ran on booze and weed, but you weren’t complete morons. That was when the three of you sat down to properly discuss boundaries, what slid and what didn’t.
You and your boys decided that night that weren’t down with the idea of everyone knowing. Too many prying eyes. The public didn’t really know, because the press would have a damn field day. 
Other than that, it was a pretty open secret. In the industry, who was going around with who didn’t really matter—a lot of them were too off their face to even care. You realized that a few years back when David Bowie walked in on you watching Jungwoo and Doyoung get it on in a bathroom at some afterparty in New York City, and closed the door muttering something about how strong the edibles were.
 So, what your manager said fell on deaf ears. Too much weed, too much adrenaline, too much energy for someone who needed to head back onto the road in a few hours.
 When you finally got back to the hotel, Jungwoo grabbed your hand in the elevator on the way up to your rooms, which were right next to each other. "You said that your bed was really big… can we come up?"
You nodded, leaning against his arm. Doyoung hummed affectionately at the sight, noting how tired you both were. 
"You two are about five seconds from passing out," Doyoung mumbled, and you waved your hand in denial. 
"Are not," you protested like a child.
"Y/N, don't be a chump. I'm pretty sure if Woo weren't next to you, you'd have fallen over."
You didn't have the energy to counter, and as the elevator slid open, you were the first one to march out, ready to just take a cold shower and die for the next few hours. 
Realistically, you knew that wasn't what would happen. What would happen was that you would shower, get into bed and then toss and turn for another hour or so. Only then would the adrenaline truly wear off. The weed didn't help, making you feel sleepy. 
You unlocked the door, and Doyoung and Jungwoo gawked at the sight—and size—of your bed. It could probably fit all three of you easily. 
Since only one room would spark rumors, the manager usually booked two: one for Doyoung and Jungwoo and one for you. Your room always went unused. Usually, you would have to push Doyoung's and Jungwoo's beds together to make enough room, leaving an awkward and uncomfortable dip for the person in the middle. Whoever got the middle was handed the terrible double edged sword: cuddles galore, but a sore back in the morning. 
Immediately Jungwoo jumped onto the bed, gasping and immediately laughed gleefully as the bed sloshed underneath him. 
"A water bed!?" He exclaimed, splaying out his limbs. "Oh, far out. You really lucked out, dollface." 
He kicked off his shoes and curled up in the middle, eyes fluttering shut. You followed, sitting at the side as you peeled off your white leather go-go boots. Throwing yourself down next to him, you sighed at the sensation of waves beneath you, and nodded. "Oh, this is ace," You murmured, "Feels great."
Peeling one eye open as Jungwoo wrapped his arm around you, your gaze landed on Doyoung, who was still leaning against the wall. You beckoned him over with a hand. "C'mere, princey." 
He made sure that the air conditioner was working before sitting down on the other side of Jungwoo, for which you were grateful. The still drying sweat on the back of your neck and on your chest started to cool instantly. You and Jungwoo giggled as Doyoung’s weight sent waves rippling beneath you.
"So, are you guys gonna sleep or what?" Doyoung asked, kicking his shoes off as well and peeling off his denim jacket. His eyes were still wide open and he didn't look tired at all. "I'm probably staying up a little later, I have some ideas for some lyrics I want to get down—"
"I would love to sleep. But I can't," Jungwoo declared before glancing knowingly at the both of you, "and neither can either of you." 
You hummed in agreement. "Hmm, you're not wrong. Too much energy left."
You turned to bury your face into his chest. His forest green short-sleeved button up was only buttoned up halfway, easily revealing his collarbones. He smelled like pot, sweat, and designer cologne. His chest rumbled as he continued to speak. 
"What about you, bunny boy? You can't tell me you don't still feel it."
"The weed or the concert jitters?" Doyoung's voice was raspy, cautious. He had a feeling he knew where this conversation was going. Once you and Jungwoo ganged up on him, it wouldn't take long to wear him down.
"Both," You and Jungwoo said in unison. You laughed at the sound. Doyoung chuckled as well, and you cracked your eyes open, despite how cozy you felt with Jungwoo stroking the skin of your nape.
"Well, the jitters are still there. That's why I'm staying up. As for the weed… well, yeah. I still feel it."
Jungwoo sighed. "How's the weed hitting you, though?"
"Honestly?" Doyoung's eyes met yours, and you felt something simmer in your chest. He huffed, deciding to take a bite of the apple, and leaned towards the both of you. 
"The weed, plus watching you two perform… Safe to say I'm pretty fuckin' horny right now."
You bit your lip, giving him a sleepy grin. "Oh, Woo, we turned him on." The teasing tone wasn't missed despite the sleepiness in your tone. 
"And what about it?" Doyoung asked, leaning back on his hands. "You can't say that watching Jungwoo do the thing doesn't get you going."
"I have a thing?" 
"We all have a thing, Woo. Princey's over there is at the end of Mr. Jones' Motorcycle. You know, when he finishes the solo? He always throws his head back, because there's sweat and hair in his eyes. You can see his neck and shit..."
Jungwoo blinked. "Shit, that is his thing… What's mine?"
You raised an eyebrow at Doyoung. "His is the thing where he gets so into it that he throws his head back and plays, and still manages to get every bass note right, right?" 
Doyoung nodded with a satisfied hum. "Gets you going, right?"
You brought a hand up to Jungwoo's chest, slowly sliding it down his stomach. Your voice lowered to a raspy murmur, and Jungwoo's hand tightened around your waist. "Damn right it does." 
"And plus, you both have told me that watching me put together the drum kit is hot."
"'Cause it is!" Again you laughed as Jungwoo said the same thing you did. 
"Jungwoo." Doyoung's voice sounded thicker. "You can't tell me that Y/N isn't an absolute vixen on stage." 
"You're right," The younger man answered, voice gruff. His hand slid down, gripping your butt and giving it a light squeeze, before directing his words at you. "Oh! Y/N, your thing is when—you know how every time you play the transition from Calabasas to Saturn’s Rings you sway your hips and flip your hair back and forth? Sometimes you’ll look at me or at Doyoung while you do, and you looked at me tonight. You're a little tease up there, dollface."
Your breath hitched at their words. “Oh, yeah?” You goaded, cuddling further into Jungwoo’s chest. You let a coy smile grace your face as your eyes fluttered shut. “What do you want me to do about it?”
“Don’t be a brat,” Doyoung growled.
“No, Doie,” Jungwoo hummed. He suddenly sounded a lot more awake. “...What would you have her do about it?”
Your eyes fluttered open, swallowing despite the sudden dryness in your throat. Doyoung's pupils were still blown wide, but you were pretty sure it wasn't because of the weed. He licked his lips. "Princess, get on your knees." 
Jungwoo prompted you up, pulling you up to stand at the side of the bed. Doyoung circled around the bed, before standing next to Jungwoo. Your gaze fluttered between your two boyfriends, one looking stern, the other looking like he was having the time of his life. 
Quietly, you lowered yourself to kneel on the plush carpet, fingers gripping the silver fabric of your dress' skirt to hike it up, so that you wouldn't kneel on it. Your hands itched to reach for them but you knew you needed to ask for permission. "Can I touch you?" 
Doyoung smiled, reaching for his belt. "There's our good girl," He said. Your mouth was already watering embarrassingly as you helped him undo his belt, pulling him out of his boxers. He was already half hard, and as you lifted your hand to spit in it, someone grabbed you gently by the rest. Jungwoo leaned over, turning your hand to reveal your palm to him. His eyes seemed to burn into yours as he let his spit fall into the palm of your hand. You felt your legs close, thighs trying to rub together at the sight. 
"Go on," Jungwoo murmured, using a hand on your jaw to move your head. Your eyes fell on Doyoung's cock again, slowly getting harder and harder. Your hand wrapped around it, stroking slowly as you met his smoldering gaze. You stroked him until he was rock hard in your grip, and his breathing turned heavy. Again, you swallowed, and Doyoung noticed this time. 
“What is it, princess? You want it in your mouth?”
“Yes, please,” You whispered, eyes wide. He chuckled breathily, head tipping back as you ran your thumb over the slit. His eyes met Jungwoo’s, who was palming himself through his pants.  
“What do you think, baby?” He asked him.
“Don’t be mean, Doyoung,” Jungwoo said softly. “Look at her, she’s desperate. Isn’t that right, Y/N?”
You whined, nodding. The pair chuckled. Jungwoo grinned at the state you were already in. “Go ahead, dollface. Give it a kiss.”
Before Doyoung could say anything else, you took his dick into your mouth, and let out a soft moan at how heavy he felt, hot and pulsing. He let out a guttural groan of your name, a hand burying itself in your hair. His other hand gripped Jungwoo’s shirt, pulling him forward to meet in a tongue-filled kiss. 
Slowly, Doyoung’s hips started rocking back and forth, grinding into your mouth. Your hands stroked what you couldn’t fit, as well as his balls. Your eyes fluttered shut, trying to relax so as to not gag on his length. But when he sped up, it became too much to avoid. 
A tap on your shoulder, and Doyoung let you off of his cock. You turned your head to look up at a very flushed Jungwoo, who had pulled his dick out of his pants as well. The words, “Me too?” tumbled out of his swollen lips. And with that gentle, breathy tone, who were you to disobey?
You wrapped your lips around Jungwoo, who hissed at the sudden heat of your mouth. From there, something primal inside of you took control, wanting nothing more than to please—you took turns sucking them off and stroking them, the muffled sounds of their moaning spurring you on.
It was always like this—during sex, Doyoung was the meaner one, manhandling you and throwing degrading words in your face that made your stomach curl in sick pleasure. He was the one who could put you in your place when you became too bratty to handle. Jungwoo was gentler, but he was all too content to watch Doyoung toss you around. He would always swoop in after Doyoung took you apart, and piece you back together. He’d tell you how good you were, how good you made the both of them feel, and while he definitely didn’t treat you like fragile porcelain, he definitely didn’t leave as many bruises as Doyoung did. 
And then, when they were both done, they’d shower you in kisses, and whisper in your ear how grateful they were to love you, and say some philosophical thing about eternal love and the cosmos that you’d always be too fucked out to comprehend, but that made your heart do a backflip regardless. 
“Shit,” Jungwoo groaned, pulling away from Doyoung’s lips. “Y/N, I’m gonna cum.” 
You pulled off of Doyoung to look up at Jungwoo. “In my—in my mouth, please, Woo.”
He nodded, licking his lips as his hands fisted themselves in your hair, gripping but not pulling as he allowed you to touch him the way you wanted. His hands gathered the loose strands into a makeshift ponytail, using it to guide your mouth up and down his hot cock. His hips bucked into your willing mouth, the sound of his hissing and his moaning getting louder and louder, until… 
"Fuck, fuck, fuck, Y/N… Y/N!" He groaned, as he came into your mouth. His head tipped back, which gave Doyoung access to his neck, pressing sloppy kisses to the skin. This sight was worth the bitter taste that coated your tongue: one of your lovers in ecstasy while the other anchored him to the ground. 
He left his dick in your mouth for a moment, before pulling out with a shaky breath. Doyoung pulled away, letting him breathe. As Jungwoo caught his breath, Doyoung pulled you up, and he sat on the bed, bringing you down with him to straddle his lap. 
You turned your head to face Jungwoo, who smiled at you, coming closer to the both of you. One of his hands patted the top of your head. "That was wicked," He said. 
Doyoung smiled softly, and gripped your chin to get you to face him. His sweet grin didn't disappear as his grip forced your mouth open. He groaned at the sight of your tongue coated in Jungwoo's semen. 
"Gorgeous," He mumbled, eyes trained on your lips as it began to spill out. 
"Kiss her," Jungwoo told him, "You know you want to."
So he did, his tongue almost immediately slipping past your lips to get a taste of Jungwoo for himself, swallowing it down greedily. Your hands came up to unbutton his black dress shirt, and his hands pushed up the skirt of your dress to get you to rock your hips against his. You gasped against his mouth at the feeling of only your soaked panties separating him and you, before pushing the shirt off of him. 
He moved to lie you down on the bed. As he pulled away from you, you caught his tongue slipping out to lick at a dribble of Jungwoo's cum on his lips. To make matters even worse, the bed was rolling beneath you, making your head spin. 
Jungwoo pulled his shirt off before he sat down behind you. Meanwhile, Doyoung moved down your body, parting your legs. He prompted you to sit up, resting your back against his chest. He pressed a kiss to your earlobe as Doyoung peeled your underwear off of you, biting his lip at the sight of your drooling pussy. 
"You're absolutely drenched, princess. And all from sucking our cocks, huh?"
You nodded, eyes fluttering shut as Jungwoo's lips began kissing along your jaw. When you didn't say anything, Jungwoo pinched your sides gently. "Use your words, doll," He whispered. From behind you, his eyes met Doyoung's. "You're gonna keep being our good little girl, right?"
"Y-yes, Jungwoo." Your hand lifted itself to press against his cheek, a silent plea for more kisses. He smiled against your skin. 
"Atta girl," He praised, "On your best behavior for us tonight, huh?" 
"The little slut's just being good because she wants to get fucked, Woo. Don't get it twisted." 
"Please, Doie," You pleaded at the mention of being fucked, "Need it."
The older man chuckled lowly, pressing the pad of his thumb to your clit. 
"Told you."
His tongue pressed itself against your hole, and you immediately cried out. You would have immediately started grinding against Doyoung's face if it weren't for Jungwoo's hands on your hips, holding you down and keeping it still. 
"I don't think you wanna do that," He murmured. His hands travelled underneath your skirt, gripping the silvery blue gossamer as he tried to lift it up. You did your best to keep your squirming at a minimum as you tried to help him get you out of it. Finally, the bell sleeves were pulled off, and you were left naked as the day you were born.
Jungwoo’s hands moved to your breasts, playing with them as he watched you whimper at the sensation of Doyoung’s mouth working at your folds. When he slipped his tongue inside, you keened, head falling against Jungwoo’s shoulder. 
“You’re so pretty like this,” He whispered. 
Your chest heaved, squirming up and down as he began to tug and pinch your nipples, calloused fingertips making you cry out.
Doyoung’s free hand gripped your thigh, and his fingers on the other hand slipped inside when he pulled his tongue out. Immediately, he plunged in two fingers, curling his fingers as he attempted to search for that one special spot.
"Ngh, Doie, faster, pleasepleaseplease." Your legs were trembling slightly now. 
"So fucking slutty," Doyoung mumbled, chuckling wickedly, "And all I had to do was stick my fingers inside." 
He complied with no protest, and the sensation of Doyoung stroking your walls and Jungwoo continuously pawing at your breasts caused a string of moans to come pouring out of your mouth. Jungwoo had been sucking a bruise into your clavicle, but leaned up to press his lips against yours. 
"Don't want anyone hearing what's meant for Doie and I," He said, lips brushing yours. 
The idea made you even needier, the double entendre making your head spin. Jungwoo didn't want anyone to hear you because if they did, rumors would spread. And on top of that? He didn't want anyone to hear. You were theirs. They were yours. This was a sacred ritual between bodies meant to be witnessed by only the three of you.
Your head felt like you were floating, even though your limbs felt like they were sinking into the watery mattress. A coil began to tighten in your stomach, and your soft whines, muffled by Jungwoo's plush lips, increased in pitch. 
They both knew what this meant, because a second later, Doyoung removed his fingers from your core, and Jungwoo pulled away, his hands moving from your breasts to rest on Doyoung's atop your hips. You were left reeling and breathing heavily, that familiar sensation floating away.
When you looked down at Doyoung, you swallowed at the sight of his lips, chin and fingers, all glistening with your wetness.
He lifted himself up off the mattress, and proceeded to sandwich your chest in between his own chest and Jungwoo’s back. He gripped his dick, rubbing it against your folds, which were now even more soaked than before.
"Tell me how much you want it, princess." He pressed his forehead against yours, hissing when the tip caught your clit. You let out a desperate whine, clinging to his broad shoulders. 
"Do—Doyoung, please fuck me," You begged, reeling at the sensation. He was so close, all he had to do was slide in. But he refused.
"Not good enough," He insisted.
"Doyoung, don't be mean," Jungwoo said, but he seemed to be more amused by your desperation than anything.
"No, I wanna hear how much she needs us."
You closed your eyes and took a few deep breaths, trying to gather your words. Jungwoo's hands stroked your sides, trying to calm you down. "You doing alright, doll? You wanna take a breather?"
"We can always stop." Doyoung's voice had turned stable, secure, safe. He started pulling away, until you grabbed him by the forearm and shook your head. You opened your eyes, seeing concern in his eyes
“No,” You mumbled, “Jus’ want some water. Think there’s some in the minibar. ‘M really hot.”
Doyoung nodded, getting up and striding over to the small refrigerator on the other side of the room. He pulled out a water bottle, and popped open the cap before passing it to you. Jungwoo had taken to fanning your face lightly with his hand. You took several long swigs of water, before setting it on the nightstand.
“I’m fine,” You promised. “Can we please keep going? I can take it.”
Doyoung pressed a kiss to your temple. “Are you absolutely sure?”
“Yeah,” You said with a nod. 
“Doyoung,” Jungwoo murmured, “Be careful.”
“I know, baby." He lowered his eyes to study your face. "I won’t go that hard on you, Y/N.”
You nodded, even though deep down you wanted to protest. You knew that this was probably the best route to take. You could already feel the high—from the weed and the concert—wearing off. You knew that if Doyoung were too rough you’d probably crash on the way down instead of float.
So, Jungwoo brushed some stray hair out of your sweaty face, and Doyoung grabbed your legs gently, wrapping them around his hips. Slowly, Doyoung eased in, and you sighed in satisfaction of finally being filled. He bit into your shoulder, taking deep heaving breaths as he let you get used to the sensation. Jungwoo took turns pressing kisses to the top of your head and the top of Doyoung’s head. 
“I love you both so much,” He whispered, “I’m so grateful the universe brought us together.” 
Doyoung looked up at him, pressing a kiss to his lips. “My baby,” He murmured against Jungwoo’s lips. He then turned to you and did the same, “My princess.”
You smiled at their words, but the need in your core was becoming unbearable. "Doie, Woo, I love you both so much," You murmured, "But Doyoung, if you don't move I'll pin you down and do it myself."
"And you were doing so well," Doyoung groaned with a laugh, before beginning to thrust his hips. It was a slow, torturous glide, and the way it caused the bed to rock left you dizzy in the best possible way. Doyoung was panting into your ear like some sort of beast, and you were whining softly with every cant of his hips.
"You must feel so good right now, huh, doll?" 
"Jung—woo," You moaned, clawing at his bicep.
"I know, dolly, I know." He sounded sympathetic enough, but the way he was grinding his dick against your ass suggested otherwise. "Bunny boy is just so good with those hips of his, hm?"
"H-he is!" You cried, "Feel so full, ah, Doyoung!" 
Doyoung's eyes met yours, and his hips picked up their pace, until your eyes rolled up into your head. Your head thrashed side to side, leaning against Jungwoo's shoulder. His mouth lowered once again to kiss at your neck, and your hand wrapped itself against his nape, while the other gripped Doyoung's shoulders.
Jungwoo's hands slithered down to where you and Doyoung were connected, and started rubbing at your clit. You shrieked, chest arching. Doyoung hissed. "Shit, do that again," He bit out, "Fuck, princess you just got so tight."
"D-Doie, harder!" 
Doyoung looked up at Jungwoo, the two having an unspoken conversation. A second later, Jungwoo gave a cautious nod. Doyoung smiled, before he adjusted his legs. Then…
Then. He began pounding into you at a breakneck pace. Your legs tightened around him, wanting him even deeper than before. 
"You love this, don't you? Our pretty little slut." His voice was tighter now, panting with exertion. You nodded. 
"Yes, yes! I'm your slut!" 
Doyoung grinned, before locking lips with you. His tongue dipped into your mouth, before letting you do the same to him. You could tell he was starting to feel something—he always kissed you or Jungwoo as a way of telling you he wouldn't last much longer. 
Truthfully, you could feel it coming too—your body felt like it was on fire, and your hips couldn't stop squirming. Whether it was towards Jungwoo's calloused fingers on your clit, Doyoung's cock, or away from both, you couldn't tell. Your moans were getting shriller too.
You clenched down on his length again, and he grit his teeth, grunting as his pace turned sloppy.
"C-c'mon, princey," You pleaded, "Give it to me, give it…"
"Shit, yes…" His head lolled onto your shoulder. "Gonna stuff you so full, princess, you'll be dripping—"
"Please! Oh, please—"
The two of you fell apart almost at the same time, your orgasm triggering Doyoung's a second later. Your mouth fell open, legs trembling and heart pounding as waves crashed over and under you.
When you came down, Doyoung rolled off of you, turning onto his side to watch you and Jungwoo. Jungwoo, who ceased the movements of his hands and slowly laid you down. Your head landed against the pillows, and you let your eyes shut as you caught your breath. 
"Can I take care of you one last time, doll?" You heard Jungwoo say. Your eyes opened blearily, and you reached a hand out towards him, legs parting of their own accord.
Both of your lovers groaned at the sight of your pussy, Doyoung's cum brimming from your folds. 
"Absolute perfection," Jungwoo murmured, crawling between your legs. He gripped his dick with one hand, the other swiping through your folds, and you immediately whined at the sensitivity there, teetering the fine line between pleasure and pain.
"Please," You whimpered, "Woo, I want it."
"You're insatiable." He sounded so affectionate, so in love. You watched as his eyes studied his index and middle fingers, covered in a mix of Doyoung's cum and yours, before dipping them into his mouth to lick them clean. You sighed, a dopey smile gracing your features. He lowered himself down to brush noses with you, dark eyes blown wide, wide awake despite the dark circles underneath.
"Guess I'll just have to do something about that."
He slid in as if he was coming home, immediately setting a solid pace that had you seeing stars, arms wrapping around his shoulders to lock hands at his nape. The sensitivity left you pliant in his arms, and Jungwoo didn't hesitate in cradling you in his arms.
"So good for us, Y/N. Always Doie and I's sweet girl." 
You nodded, tears brimming at your eyes at the heaviness in your chest, the pulsing in your core. His hair was falling into his eyes, and you lifted your hands to his face, doing your best to brush it away. Your hands cupped his cheeks, heavy eyes burning into his. Your hips were rutting against his desperately now, wanting nothing more than to feel that high with him.
Jungwoo pressed a brief kiss to your neck, feeling something simmer in his gut embarrassingly fast. 
Doyoung placed his head next to yours, gently lifting Jungwoo's head to kiss him, hand brushing the other man's ass. When he pulled away, he kissed you as well, and Jungwoo's mouth pressed itself to one of your nipples. You keened against Doyoung's mouth, hips losing all semblance of grace.
Here, you were needy, animalistic, running on instincts, and your boys were drinking it up like water from a desert oasis. 
Doyoung pulled away, a thin trail of spit connecting his lips to yours. His hands cradled your head.
"Can you feel it yet, princess?"
Your eyebrows furrowed, silent moans falling from your lips. "Ah, yeah, Doie… s-so close…"
"Me too," Jungwoo groaned between your breasts, "So wet, Y/N…"
"That's from all the cum she's filled with, right, princess?"
You nodded. "Mm—ngh! Stuffed me so good, Doie." 
"Yeah? You gonna let Jungwoo fill you up even more? Gonna keep it all inside, right?"
Your stomach did a backflip, and you felt your toes curl. "Yes, yes, yes, yes, I want it—"
"I'll give it to you, doll," Jungwoo growled, "It's all—fuck—all yours. S-same way this is all for us, right?"
Those words were what caused you to finally fall over the edge. Your high was so intense that you could have sworn that your ears popped—clawing at Jungwoo’s shoulders, your eyes squeezed shut. Only one side ended up scratched, since you always kept your right hand nails short to properly play guitar. You sobbed against Doyoung’s lips, and he eagerly swallowed up your cries, shushing you gently as you came back down.
You didn't feel Jungwoo come inside, but you felt it immediately afterwards—the satisfying stickiness, the warmth in your stomach. 
You looked at Jungwoo, pressing a soft kiss to his sweaty forehead before prompting him to move off. He wrapped his arm around you, pulling you towards him as his little spoon, peppering kisses to your cheek and whispering how good you were. The two of you looked at Doyoung. You reached out, making grabby hands at him. His eyes were drooping, and he was blinking blearily as if he were trying to fight off sleep.
Still, he got up and pulled his pack of cigarettes out of his shirt pocket, as well as his lighter. As he sat back down on the bed, the waves sent you and Jungwoo further and further into the recesses of slumber. As consciousness left you, you caught Doyoung looking down at the two of you as if you were the most precious beings he'd ever encountered. His tone was low and grumbly, but there was a glint of smug satisfaction in his eye.
"I hope you two are happy. I can't remember those goddamn lyrics anymore." 
277 notes · View notes
fbfh · 5 years ago
Text
“forever” paxton hall-yoshida x reader
genre: fluffy romance + mutual pining (not too slowburn tho lol)
word count: 3.4k
au: none?? jock x theatre nerd ig
pairing: Paxton x broadway baby!reader 
requested: yes !! i hope u like it uwu
warnings: one hell one motherfucking and i think that’s it for swearing?? um brief self deprecating/talking bad abt urself from paxton (bby boy needs a self love boost), reader and paxton are home alone together for a little while but nothing bad happens, uh,,, i think that’s it
summary: when Eleanor can’t run lines with you, she sends over a very attractive, mutually pining substitute.
reccomended songs: “Seventeen” - Tuck everlasting OBC, “The Kiss” -The Princess Diaries score
a/n: i’m p sure i kept the reader p gender neutral but there’s implied slightly long hair, and you play the lead (a girl named winnie) in ur schools production of tuck everlasting but like it’s theatre so anyone can play anyone lol,, this took so got dam long bc i’m fucking s o f t for jock x artist and it just sorta happened lol aLsO,, not super thoroughly edited so there might be a typo or two?? im tired lol
requests r open <3
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You had only ever seen two athletes present during rehearsals. Once when Madeline (who at the time was playing Penny in your production of Hairspray) was dating a guy from the soccer team. The other was when the star of the basketball team had come in to give your choreographer pointers for the basketball scenes during High School Musical. 
Until now.
You had run onstage part of the way through “Live Like This”, which wasn’t out of the ordinary since so much progress had been made on the costumes. You were still tying the ribbon on your pinafore as you jumped into the song, but when your eyes met a face in the usually empty auditorium, you faltered. You almost sang the wrong verse, but recovered quickly, continuing with the blocking. What felt like a moment later, the number was almost done and you were nearing the end of your counterpoint with Mae Tuck - played by Eleanor, of course. Who could be better for the part? You held out the last note, trying to stay in character despite all the distractions in the back of your mind. You had to talk to Eleanor when the director called for 10; she’d started telling you how Devi was being weird recently. Also, what the Hadestown was Paxton Hall-Yoshida doing chilling in the auditorium? You shoved all that away, focusing on staying in character until the director called for a break. 
‘I want to go to the fair. I want to go so badly! I just need a change, need to get out of this house for a little while. I never do anything, so this can’t be asking for too much, right?’ 
You projected all that into your everything - face, voice, mannerisms, energy.
“Hold!” 
Everyone froze.
The director wrote a few things on his paper, sighed, and underlined something several times. 
“Okay, good job! I need to revise some of the blocking, then we’ll do notes, so take ten.” Your sudden nerves had definitely made you pitchy, you knew that would be one of your notes for sure. 
A chorus of “Thank you ten”s erupted, and you immediately ran to Eleanor, telling the others good job as you passed. 
You leaned in and started speaking to her, quietly.
“Okay you need to finish telling me about Devi, and that other news you’re being so cryptic about! Also, what’s up with Fierro over there?” you nodded towards Paxton hoping he wouldn’t see, and you noticed Fab is sitting near him. You realized they’re probably waiting for Eleanor and/or Devi. That must be it, he’s been hanging out with them lately, right? Eleanor gasped.
“You’re right! Paxton is such a Fierro!”
You cringed inwardly a little bit as her voice carried through the auditorium, mixing with the others. Your eyes darted over to him for a fraction of a second. Oh god. He was looking at you. Or in your general direction at least. Lena, the costumer, walked around the set gingerly, following you around and getting you out of your dress incredibly carefully as you and Eleanor walked off stage. 
“No! Well, yes- but no. What’s he doing here? Jocks never come here during rehearsals. I saw Fab too, are you guys and Devi getting dinner or something?” You said, entering the auditorium, and stepping out of the dress. You grabbed sweatpants and a silky, floral kimono jacket from your bag to throw over your leotard and tights. She waved back at Fab before sitting down in the front. You both grabbed your fans and dramatically flicked them open in sync. Your wrists fluttered, cooling both of you off.  A knowing, and slightly mischievous, look came on her face. 
“Devi and Fab and I are. Paxton must be here for something… else.” she shrugged, nodding towards Paxton. You looked over again. He was staring at you. You did a double take and tried to hold back your smile. 
“Wh- I do not know to what you are referring.” 
“To what I am referring is the blush on his cheeks.”
You barely held back a nervous, bubbling laugh.
“He is not blushing! Why would he be blushing!”
“I don’t know,” She shrugged, “Just like how I don’t know that he’s been loitering in the halls outside the music room during your last three solo music rehearsals.”
You struggled for an answer. Before you could form one, you were interrupted.
“Okay, okay what is the best Lin Manuel Miranda musical? Because Kathryn thinks it’s Hamilton-” 
“Duh!”
“-But I think it’s In the Heights! It’s an underrated jewel!” Jonah interjected, still wearing his Jesse Tuck hat. 
You considered for a moment.
“I mean, they’re too different to compare. In the Heights has the same energy as Rent - showcasing what goes on in ordinary people’s lives, and how love ties us all together,” he nodded in agreement, “But Hamilton is on a way larger scale, almost Les Mis meets Fun Home vibes. But in terms of personal preference…” Eleanor scoffed at your answer, and Jonah went back to debate further with Kathryn.
“Anyway,” you turned back to Eleanor to ask her what the hell she meant by Paxton Hall-Yoshida was blushing. But before you could-
“Eleanor, we need you to try on your blue dress again,” Lena was already pulling her away, “I had the empire waist in the right place but half the pins fell out, and it’s just...” And she was whisked away before you could finish the thought. You just had time to help Holly get out her wig pins and drink some lemon water before notes. Eleanor still wasn’t back, so you made sure to write down hers for her. It was pretty standard; be quiet backstage, go over your lines, don’t touch props that aren’t yours, don’t eat in costume, and a couple blocking changes you made note of. After your end of rehearsal warm downs and huddle, everyone left relatively quickly. You ducked into the bathroom to freshen up a little. Sometimes it was hard coming down from such intense energy after rehearsal. You mentally ran through your to do list. You needed to get some more tea, write that essay when you got home, go over your notes- You gasped, cutting off your own train of thought. You ran out of the bathroom to look for Eleanor, still clutching her notes in hand. 
~
Your voice still echoed in Paxton’s ears. He wished he had a whole album of you singing. Your voice made him want to ruin his spotify algorithm by listening to nothing else. You had looked at him a couple times, and his heart had almost stopped. He didn’t know eye contact could be so intense. It’s probably just cause you’re like, the only person in the audience. Where else is she supposed to look? He deflated a little. He heard his name and looked over to you and Eleanor talking together. Hopefully it was about him. Hopefully it was good. He checked his phone, trying to look busy. When he glanced up to see if you were looking, you were gone. He started to look around for you when he saw Eleanor waving at Fab, and sure enough, you were next to her. What he didn’t expect was you dropping your dress to the ground. Time slowed down (and his heart sped up) as you stretched a little, and pulled out sweatpants from your bag.
Wow.
 You had on what looked like a bathing suit on underneath, and a few other people had done the same, but he knew that image would be in his memory, probably forever. His heart was beating in his ears and he knew he must be blushing.
“You okay, Paxton?” Fab asked, a seat or two away. Oh god, he didn’t want people asking why he blushed every time he looked at you! He muttered something about needing to make a call and headed for the doors. Don’t look back at her, don’t look back at her… His eyes involuntarily darted in your direction right before he left. You had on a flowy translucent jacket, your hair thrown back supermodel style as you fanned yourself to cool down. He needed to cool down too. Maybe a cold shower, a really cold shower.
~
You managed to find Eleanor just before she left. Two girls were with her, you had seen Fab once, and you’d heard a lot about Devi, but had never been introduced. 
You gave Eleanor her notes, and she hugged you.
“You’re a lifesaver!” 
“Of course, I-”
“Uh, who’s this?” you looked over, and the shorter girl - Devi, based on what you’d heard about her -  was giving you a weird look. You introduced yourself. 
“Nice to meet you. How do you know Eleanor?” said the taller girl - definitely Fab.
“Oh,” you smiled, “she’s my almost mother in law. And my arch rival,” you counted on your fingers, “my sister, my niece, my lover, my husband, and…” you trailed off, trying to think of the other dynamics your characters had had in past shows.
“Your co-conspirator.” 
“Right,” you laughed. Devi and Fab looked at you two.
“We’re in the musical together.” you clarified. You were about to part ways when you called to Eleanor, “Hey, we’re still on for running lines tomorrow night?” 
“Uh… Sounds good!” she walked away quickly, speaking to Devi and Fab in hushed tones. Something was definitely up. That was typical Eleanor Scheming behavior. 
~
That night, you almost couldn’t sleep. This wasn’t the normal post rehearsal can’t sleep. In fact, Tuck Everlasting was the last thing on your mind as you readjusted your pillows and snuggled into your duvet. You stared at the neon blue stars projected and swirling on your ceiling. You sighed. Again. Your brain was a 24/7 livestream of Paxton Hall-Yoshida to relax/study to. You saw him again, his face in the dimly lit auditorium, Adonis in a sea of faded seats. If you hadn’t been sure before, you knew now that red was definitely his color. You rolled onto your side. Your heart picked up speed as a thought crossed your mind. You could almost see Paxton now, kneeling next to you, his fingertips brushing your cheek. The piano underscore to “Seventeen” ran through your mind. You could imagine him saying “Wait with me, we could share the world…” so vividly it almost hurt. He leaned in, and… 
You let out a loud sigh and rolled over again. Your heart was fully saturated. That’s more than enough pining for tonight. 
~
“Paxton!” 
He was a little surprised when Eleanor just walked up to him at lunch the next day. Most people were too intimidated to approach him out of the blue. 
“I have a plan.”
“Uh, I don’t know what you-”
“Cut the crap, I know you like her.” 
His face blanched. Well, yeah of course he did. Who wouldn’t? He was going to ask Eleanor if there was something he could do to win you over, just not here, not now. Not where everyone could watch and jeer and rib him for it. Just like they were doing now. 
“Woah, dude, who is it?” Trent asked. He fumbled for words. He couldn’t believe this was happening. He hadn’t kept his crush a secret because he was embarrased of you, he’d kept it a secret because his dumbass friends wouldn’t get you. Hell, he barely got you. You were so deep, and emotive, and artistic... 
“Bro, if you like her as much as it seems like you do,” Trent continued, “you gotta win her over.” He was a little shocked at the agreement murmuring through his group of friends. He didn’t know how to respond. Trent turned to Eleanor.
“What’s the plan, drama mama?”
“First of all,” she said, an almost humorously dangerous look on her face, “never call me that again. Second,” she shoved some papers into Paxton’s hands, “meet me in the music room immediately after school.” She started back for her table. Trent looked back over to Paxton. 
“You gotta do it, dude. We’ll cover for you at swim.” 
The rest of his friends agreed. He was pleasantly surprised at how supportive they were being. 
“Yeah, I guess... we’ve got a plan.”
~
The next day went by pretty smoothly. No rehearsal was scheduled since they were finishing construction for some of the sets, but everyone was instructed to do a couple read throughs of the script, focusing on scenes they’re still forgetting, to make sure everyone’s off book. You stopped by 7 Eleven to get a blue slurpee (for homework) and a couple coconut waters (for run throughs). You texted Eleanor on your way to the slurpee machine. 
okay so do you like the mango coconut water or the pineapple one?? It’s the mango one right?? i always forget lmao
sent at 4:16 pm
btw I don’t have that much homework so you can probs come by around 5:30 if you’re ready by then
sent at 4:16 pm
Bae Tuck
OMFG!! I totally forgot about running lines tonight, I can’t make it! :( but I’ll send someone over to help you out. :)
sent at 4:17 pm
You squinted at your screen. That was weird. Eleanor never used colon parentheses smilies. Like, ever. She always used emojis, and usually way more than two per text. 
yeah np, are u good? ♡
sent at 4:17 pm
Bae Tuck
Yes :)
sent at 4:18 pm
Bae Tuck
Also get the passionfruit one 🥥🍠 👀
sent at 4:18
that’s,,, el that’s a sweet potato,,
sent at 4:19 pm
Bae Tuck
Close enough 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️
sent at 4:19pm
...Okay? That was definitely weird. You shook it off and headed for the counter to pay. You stopped half way there, and turned back to swap the mango for passionfruit. 
Not long after you had finished your homework and tidied up your room a little, the doorbell rang. You exited the kitchen, drinks in hand, and opened the door. Your heart caught in your throat. Paxton Hall-Yoshida was standing outside. And you were pretty sure he looked nervous. You both just stood there for a second. No one breathed, no one spoke. 
“Uh, hi, do you want to…” you backed up, motioning for him to come inside. 
“Yeah, thanks,” he said, entering the doorway. Paxton motherfucking Hall-Yoshida was in your living room. You held out a hand to him.
“Coconut water?” he took the box, looked at the label, and smiled. 
“Yeah, thanks,” he said again, this time a faint, yet unmistakable note of joy in his voice. He took a sip. He smiled.
“Passionfruit’s my favorite.” You silently thanked Eleanor, who you knew must have planned all this. Most of the evening was a blur, and you thanked god your family wasn’t home right now. You went upstairs, texted Eleanor asking what the actual fuck, made some surprisingly comfortable small talk, then filled him in on how to run lines. 
“Do you think playing the soundtrack would help you… get into character?” he asked. 
“I would probably just end up singing the whole thing,” You laughed and tried to ignore the butterflies in your chest. The main scene you struggled with was before “Seventeen”. It was harder to get into Winnie’s head because you had no romantic feelings for Jonah, and you always just made each other laugh. You had started with a few easier scenes of Winnie and Jesse, like the fair, and the dialogue before “Top of the World”. 
“That was really good,” he said, and you felt the sincerity of his words. 
“Thanks…” you smiled and took a sip of coconut water, hoping you weren’t blushing too hard. 
“So what next?” he asked. 
“Probably the scene before ‘Seventeen’,” you said, giving him the page and scene number, “it’s one of the hardest ones for me. I guess I just can’t connect to Jonah the way Winnie does.” 
“Huh,” he said, skimming the page. When you looked up at him, he had something between a smile and a smirk playing at his lips. You made yourself look away before you got too distracted. You refused to think about the fact that you were sitting across from Paxton Hall-Yoshida on your bed, in your room, like you were… close with each other. His eyes skimmed the script, finding the dialogue. He glanced up at you and nodded, indicating he found his place. You began.
“I was so afraid you wouldn’t get away,” you said, jumping into character.
“I may be 102, but I can still outrun anyone,” a smile played at his lips. You smiled, then let your face fall.
“I’m so sorry, I-I tried to warn you-”
“No, no,” he interjected almost seamlessly, “It’s okay, it’s… refreshing having someone look after me who isn’t my mom.” His eyes flickered between your face and the page. You smiled with him for a second, then let distress cloud your face.
“Jesse… that man came by my house today. He heard the music box, he knows about you-”
“I know he knows…” 
You continued on with the scene and he trailed off when he came to the sheet music for the song Seventeen. You took in a breath to start the dialogue in the middle of the song, but before you could…
“Six years from now you will turn seventeen,
Turn seventeen,
The same age as me,
Six years from now,
Go to the spring,
Go to the spring and drink…”
He was singing to you. He was looking at you and singing to you. His eyes only flickered down to the page to confirm the lyrics. He was nervous, you could tell. But through his hesitance, the emotion in his voice was sincere. Your heart was beating faster. You didn’t even notice your pulse was ringing in your ears, you were too focused on Paxton. 
“I'll wait for you till you turn seventeen,
Turn seventeen,
The same age as me,
Six years from now,
Go to the spring,
Go to the spring and drink…” Your hand rose to cover your mouth. He hesitated, and you remembered your dialogue.
“Uh, wh-what if I… forget where the spring is?” He reached out and took your free hand in his. Your pulse was off the charts. “I’ll go get you some water. Just… remember to keep it somewhere safe. Somewhere no one will find it.” You got the feeling he wasn’t just talking about the water. You knew he had never really been in a serious relationship before, and it clicked suddenly - if he learned an entire song to duet with you, just how much he must like you. You exhaled a breathy laugh, unsure how to process the sudden euphoria you felt. 
“You make the world sound so… exciting. I just want to drink the water right now!”
“Uh, no. You have to wait.” you both smiled, anticipating the upcoming joke.
“Why?” you ask, “What’s the difference?” You held your breath as he tried not to laugh through the delivery of the punchline. 
“Believe me,” he rubbed his thumb over your hand, “there’s a difference.” You both chuckled, and he continued singing. You were so focused on him, so… touched that he would do all this for you. 
“Winnie, wait with me,
And we could be married,
Winnie, wait with me,
And we'll share the world,
Winnie, you can stop time,
And live like this,
Forever…”
“I could live like this forever,” you echoed.
“Live like this...” you sang in tandem.
“What do you say, Winnie? Do you want to…” he broke character suddenly, and asked, his eyes boring into yours, “Do you want to go out some time?” 
He could see the adorable smile blooming on your face, even from behind your hand. You nodded.
“Yes, I-I would love that,” and you began to sing the last line in the song, “Forever-” 
But before you finished holding out the note, his lips were on yours. His mouth moved slowly, intentionally, against yours. You followed his lead, flustered. He leaned further forward, his palm caressing your cheek. It was everything you imagined it would be, and you had quite the imagination. Your head was angled up and your hands rested themselves on his back, one tracing little shapes. Your shoulders were pressed against each other and neither of you could think. He was so warm. He tasted like coconut and passion fruit, and a distant part of your mind silently thanked Eleanor again. 
You really could live like this forever.
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efyra · 4 years ago
Note
EEEK I WAS SO EXCITED TO JOIN UR CELEBRATION i knew it wouldnt be long til u post it🦋
can i get 🌷 im a female she/her, ravenclaw, im easily bored n a perfectionist idk if being easily bored is a personality or not lol facts abt me: im using a baby towel as my towel, im using a baby lotion, i love to collect anything that has simba from the lion king in it bcs my fav animal is lion n my fav movie is the lion king n i like to bake😋 ship me w whoever give me the wildcard!
i wrote 4 facts hshdhshs but i hope thats okay congratulations again my love😘
my sweet naila 🥺 thank you, my popcorn 🍿i really hope you like it!
✨ 𝐣𝐨𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝟓𝟎𝟎 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ✨
and because i know you, i ship you with...
draco malfoy
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Hakuna Matata?
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note: just an alternate universe where draco doesn’t become a death eater
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On a spring afternoon, Draco told you:
"You're wrong, you know?"
Your eyebrow arched. "Why do you say that?"
"Because it's true" he chuckled.
"Draco" you turn your body so you can face your Slytherin boyfriend "I'm sure we spoke for the first time in Hogsmeade."
"You're wrong" he repeated, still with a presumptuous and funny tone.
You huffed. "So, will you tell me when we first spoke?"
"Professor Slughorn had just passed us an assignment on Everlasting Elixirs..." Draco smothered a laugh when he saw your eyes widen.
"Oh no..."
"Oh yes"
And in fact, Draco was right.
The first time you spoke was after a Potions class during your sixth year. You had stayed in the classroom to ask some questions to Professor Slughorn about the assignment you were supposed to do, and for this reason, you were late for your next class.
You ran down the corridors to get to the Charms classroom, but you always were a little clumsy and stumbled on your own feet. For your luck - very lucky - you find something to hold on to: the platinum blond boy's robes in front of you.
Draco is pulled back when he feels something grabbing on his Slytherin robe. "Hey, be more careful" he said angry and when he turned to find out who had dared to do such a thing, he sees you and, for a moment, he is lacking of words.
The Slytherin boy kinda knows you.
"The Ravenclaw girl that smells like baby lotion and vanilla. What is her name...?"
But he didn’t have time to ask you anything because the second you two run into each other, you start saying, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." and quickly pick up your stuff that fell to the ground before running back to your next class.
He realized that you missed your quill. Unwittingly, Draco opened a smile and picked up the object, keeping it in his pocket.
"You stole my quill!" you exclaimed, pointing a finger in the direction of your boyfriend. "I've been looking for it for days!"
"In my defense, I wanted to give it back to you," Draco explains, "but you always ran away from me.
Once again, he was right: you, in fact, tried your best to avoid any contact with Slytherin boy; this was because you were aware of his arrogant fame and didn't want to hear any unpleasant words, but this never happened.
"Here" Draco extends to you the quill.
A surprised look appears on your face when you take the familiar object in your hands. "Have you kept it all this time?" you ask with curiosity.
He shrugs. "I was waiting for an opportunity to give it back to you, but..."
"But?" you insist.
"We met at Three Broomsticks... so I decided to keep it to myself."
Months after that first "conversation", you and Draco met again.
You were entering the pub at the same instant he was leaving; and for the second time, you bumped into each other.
"Can you tell me if this will become an annoying habit?" the blond asked in irritation.
But you ignored him completely, your neck rising up and looking around the place, searching for something; apparently your friends hadn't finished their shopping at Honeydukes yet.
Draco snapped his fingers in front of you, catching your attention - hating to be ignored.
"Ah" you gasped, remembering the Slytherin boy’s presence "I'm sorry, I thought I was late and...".
"Is that why you're still wearing a towel?" he questioned amusingly, pointing towards your neck.
To your horror, you still carried your Lion King towel over your shoulders and thought you would regret for all eternity to embarrass yourself in front of Draco freaking Malfoy, but fate had a funny way of executing its plans.
"But what's this weird thing?" was the question that started your relationship with Draco.
The second time you talked was much longer than the first; you sat at a table at Three Broomsticks and drank butterbeer while you told Slytherin boy the story of Simba.
Draco hadn't found the story super interesting, but he had definitely loved being able to feel your baby lotion and vanilla perfume more. He had loved to hear the sound of your voice. He hadn't been able to take his eyes off you while you made exaggerated gestures with your hands trying to describe scenes from the children's movie - he thought you looked beautiful, very beautiful.
You said goodbye to each other when your friends showed up next to your table holding Honeydukes' bags. And you thought you would never talk to Draco Malfoy again, but you were wrong, because, that night, he went to sleep thinking about you.
The third time you talked was the next day when Draco kicked out your partner from Potions to sit next to you. Professor Slughorn couldn't care less about the exchange of partners and gave you an assignment to do in pairs.
As you continued talking with him, you realized that the blond Slytherin boy might not be so unpleasant.
The first time your heart beat faster when you were in Draco's presence was when he held your hand when you were about to add an ingredient to the potion you should prepare together.
"Silly girl" he had said with a smile "you have to prick it first.
Then, one afternoon you were in Hogwarts library, researching in several books what you could include in the Potions report that you should write in pairs. 
"We should put this" Draco pointed to a line on the book's page.
It took you a few seconds to read what was written and you shook your head. "No, no."
"Why not?" The blond frowned.
"Because it's too obvious!" you huffed. "I bet everyone will write the same thing."
"Maybe because it's right?" he said almost incredulous.
"Writing something right, but still different is what will make us stand out," you winked. 
And it was on that day that Draco Malfoy realized that he might be in love with you.
Your first kiss was a few days before the end of the school year, after a hard exams period, you were sharing a couch on Slytherin's common room and a chocolate frog.
"I got dirty?" you asked after licking the chocolate leftovers from your fingers, turning to Draco. Unconsciously, you tilted your head to the side and your lips curved up in a little smile - at that moment, Draco thought you had never looked so cute, but at the same time, so irresistible.
Without answering your question, he brought his face close to yours, connecting your lips in a sweet kiss.
You and Draco were together, but you were not dating.
During the summer, you exchanged letters almost every day. You had gotten used to Draco's presence, it was weird not being with him.
When September arrived again, you didn't waste any time and got in the train, looking for the platinum blond who occupied your thoughts the whole time, but it was him who found you.
You two shared a cabin - and nobody dared to join you.
"Ah" you extended a bag that you were carrying in Draco's direction "this is for you".
The Slytherin boy looked at you surprised - and a little terrified.
"Is that a gift? I didn't even buy her a gift... did I have to buy a gift? Will she be upset? What if she...", but his thoughts were interrupted when you said, "It's just some cookies. I promise it's not poison or anything" with a playful smile on your face.
Draco didn't know you could bake, but he was pleasantly surprised to find out - especially since your cookie was delicious.
And that was the day he was sure that he fell in love with you.
He asked you to be his girlfriend on a Christmas morning in Hogwarts right after giving you a nice necklace as a gift.
And since then, you had brought Draco a joy he had never felt before - and which he never thought he could feel.
Your favorite pastime was to go to Three Broomsticks and drink butterbeer together while you talked about the most diverse subjects.
And Draco still loved to hear you talking about Lion King.
That same spring afternoon, you and Draco were in Slytherin's common room; he was sitting on an armchair and you were on his lap.
"You know, I still think you should watch Lion King with me," you say, your fingers brushing through your boyfriend's platinum blond wires.
"I rather hearing you telling the story to me" Draco answers with a smile, giving a kiss in the corner of your mouth. "Besides, we need to finish that Potions assignment."
"Oh no, let's stay like this a little bit longer."
"But that's for two days from now."
"Hakuna Matata, Draco. Hakuna Matata."
"Hakuna Matata?"
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platonicavengers · 4 years ago
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Slowed Down
pairing: avengers x fem!reader; platonic!bucky x reader; platonic!sam x reader; platonic!wanda x reader; platonic!peter x reader
word count: 790 :/ sorry
warnings: general sadness, poorly written angst, a lil swearing, post-infinity war ouchieness
author’s note: somebody pls request something fluffy bc all ive written is angst bruh. ALSO this can be read as a part 2 to within seconds or as a stand-alone, whatever u choose :) also if anyone wants me to rewrite this but make it gender neutral then i def will!! i wanna make sure everyone can read my writing :) i love u all sm
summary: you wake up in the soul world after being snapped from existence, but you soon learn that you aren’t alone.
my masterlist | read it on ao3 | read it on wattpad
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The feeling of their body slowly fading away was easily the worst pain Y/N had ever experienced. It felt like each individual molecule was being torn apart, one by one, unrelenting until they were completely gone.
But that wasn’t the worst part of it all.
The worst part of it was waking up inside the void-like Soul World.
••
Y/N awoke with a start, gasping desperately for breath. Their hands shaking wildly, they rapidly patted down her body, making sure what they were experiencing was real, and not just something their imagination created.
When they realized her body was in fact, completely intact, their shaking hands went to their hair, gripping it tightly as they sucked in a deep breath. They exhaled shakily, loosening their hold slightly.
Where the hell am I, they thought to themself, and what the hell happened?
They slowly stood up, stumbling a bit, but catching themself before they could fall. Glancing around, they watched as dozens more people started appearing around them. Their eyes widened, taking a step back. It was then that they remembered what had happened, what brought them to where they were. Tears prickled at the back of their eyes, but they willed themself not to let them fall, at least not until they understood more of the situation.
Inhaling deeply, they took a few steps in a random direction. But before they got far, someone appeared in front of them. Someone familiar. As their eyes locked on the long brown hair before them, they couldn’t stop themself from running towards the figure.
Bucky.
He barely had time to register what was happening before they latched themself onto him, burying their face in his chest. Once Bucky composed himself, he held them just as tightly, many different emotions floating through him all at once. He was glad he wasn’t alone in wherever-the-hell-he-was, but he wished that Y/N hadn’t been taken there as well. And despite being upset that they were there, he was glad that they wasn’t alone, either.
A few moments later, Y/N pulled away, wiping away a tear from their cheek. They sniffed, before clearing their throat, “B-Bucky, where are we?”
He shook his head slightly, a sad smile on his face, “Not sure, but we’ll get outta here eventually, I’m sure of it.”
Just as they nodded, a voice from behind Bucky startled them.
“Any idea what the hell’s going on here?”
Sam.
They stepped away, quickly embracing Sam in a tight hug just as they did Bucky. He chuckled, wrapping his arms around them.
Letting go, they stepped aside, playing with their fingers to help with their nerves as they listened absentmindedly to Bucky and Sam’s conversation.
Y/N was broken from their thoughts as they heard footsteps approaching them, and they turned so fast, they could’ve sworn they got whiplash. But they felt their eyes tear up again as they saw Wanda running towards them. The two met halfway in a tight hug, neither of them being able to hold back their tears. They stayed like that for almost two minutes before slowly pulling away.
“Y-Y/N, Vision-” The redhead started, but she couldn’t finish her sentence. She looked to the ground, unable to stop the new wave of tears.
Y/N felt a pit grow in the bottom of their stomach, but they refused to let themself cry, “I know, Wanda. I know.”
Eventually, the pair walked back over to Bucky and Sam, only to see a shorter figure with them. They sped up their pace as they realized the figure was Peter.
As soon as Peter laid eyes on Y/N, he quickly ran into their arms, sobbing loudly. They was quick to hug him back, one hand combing through his hair, and the other resting on his back.
When his sobs only grew louder instead of calming down, they started whispering soothing words in his ear, trying to reassure him.
Eventually his sobbing turned to hyperventilating, and Y/N quickly brought him down to the ground with them, sitting to the right of him, “Hey, Peter, can you look at me, please? I need you to take deep breaths honey, in and out. Okay, can you do that? Just follow my breathing, okay?”
Y/N managed to calm him down after a few minutes, and the other three joined the pair, sitting down around them. Sam sat on Y/N’s other side, Wanda next to Peter, and Bucky next to Wanda. The five of you sat there, silently, for about ten minutes before Wanda broke the silence.
“So what do we do now?”
You glanced at her, grabbing hold of her hand, squeezing it lightly, “We wait. We wait for everyone else to get us the hell outta here.”
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februaryberries · 4 years ago
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Study (?) tips that you don’t see on every study post
Hi gamers, I just finished my first year at college/university!!
This year was really a struggle for me because I was trying to get the help I needed for my mental health, and I did not succeed until literally the week before finals spring term. I just got diagnosed w ADHD and put on meds (thank god) and I’m excited for the next year to come.
Though this year was absolutely grueling I did discover some little tips that can really help ! This is coming from my experience w ADHD but it could relate to other neurodiverse learners as well ! Even if you are neurotypical some of these might help !! 
This post got really long so I’m gonna put it under the cut but, main Idea is bolded w a more in depth explanation underneath ( for those like me who see a block of text and go running)
In no particular order:
If you can/are up for it take a class before noon even if you are not a morning person. I am NOT saying take an 8am when u regularly go to bed at 4am! Bc that is dumb bb pls get some sleep. In my experience once I go to class my brain is like “oh things are happening now, it is actually a day and not just existing in a timeless hellscape.”
Once I am out of bed/out of my room I am at least mildly more productive for the rest of the day. Going to a class before noon means you are up and doing things for the day and early enough that you still have light. This ties into the next one
Start while it’s still light out!! At least for me I gain so much happiness from natural light/sunlight, and it is very hard for me to do things let alone START things once it’s dark out because my brain is like nope the day is over now. Plus in the fall/winter days days are getting shorter and shorter so it’s important to make use of as much daylight as you can. I feel like a plant w how much I rely on light to survive but it really does help! 
Put on ‘Real People’ clothes. This is something that really helps me, even if it’s just like, jeans and a turtleneck, maybe tucked in w a belt. I’ve found that when I put on academic-y clothes or like Adult clothes it helps me switch my brain into school mode. It’s kinda like putting on a uniform for work? If I’m in too loose of clothes or like pyjamas for example, I’m much less likely to be able to switch my brain into productive mode. For me especially its when i’m wearing tighter clothing rather than baggy ones? Like i said a turtleneck which like the sleeves are fitted to my arms, and jeans or pants that are fitted to my legs. I think it helps because it makes me more aware of my body in the space? Idk.  figure out what real people clothes feel like to you, and then have a couple of go to outfits you can slip on when you’ve been in a hoodie and sweatpants all day and really need to get some work done. 
On that note, put on shoes. For me along w the tight clothing, I do better in shoes, specifically ones that lace up and can be tight. Like hightop converse, or boots, or even dress shoes w laces. I think in a way my body needs to be contained so I can focus on something? I’m not sure why I feel like that but i’ve learned to work w it. Putting on shoes for me helps because
1. I’m not distracted by what I’m putting my bare feet on (i cannot stand wearing socks unless im wearing shoes so yes bare feet)
2. I’m not getting distracted by my floor n the fact that hey maybe i should sweep bc there are some crumbs sticking to my feet now.
And 3. You put on shoes when you are going to go outside and go somewhere. It’s like putting pyjamas on to go to bed, you’re brain associates those items with doing something, so putting on shoes can signal to your brain hey we are doing something now, and that something is work.
Talk to your teachers !! I understand sometimes you have a teacher from hell and honestly idk what to tell you at that point but in  a lot of cases teachers can be very understanding !! The amount of support I’ve gotten from my teachers this year is absolutely insane and 100% the only thing that made it so I didn’t get kicked out of college. Like reaching out to your teachers shows that you care! if you have to take a mental health day sometimes let them know !! i would always let my teacher know that I really wanted to be in class but I just couldn’t handle it that day. They also can help connect you to resources you didn’t know about ! 
Look into what resources your school has !! I was talking about how next year is gonna go now that I’ve been diagnosed and such with my friend, and how I was gonna contact the DRC (disability resource center) and she didn’t know you could get support for having ADHD!! Like I know you can get extensions on due dates, attendance forgiveness, and even potentially note taking assistance when you have ADHD and talk to them. even if you are medicated it doesn’t 100% solve everything and there are still ways to get support! Whether its study groups, writing centers/support, tutoring, or even contacting your drc or whatever your school has, it can really help!! I’m definitely going to take advantage of these resources if I can next year ! 
Find a place outside you can go to clear your head (or have a mental breakdown) 
I can’t even begin to count the amount of times i’ve been freaking out over something or stressed out of my mind and my room started to feel to stuffy and claustrophobic and i just needed to get OUT. try to make sure it’s somewhere safe and close that you can go to even at night. (maybe try to shoot a text to your best friend that you’re out and if you don’t let them know you’re home by a certain time to start raising alarm, your safety is the most important) I tend to like to be up high because i’m further away from people, and the streets and I’m closer to the sky.
My go to thinking/breakdown spot is the roof of the parking garage a block away. It has stairs that are easy access and the top levels are usually empty even during the day. It really helps me to just go out and listen to music and collect my thoughts sometimes. My head can start going a million directions at lightspeed and I need to stop and be present, and being outside helps. It’s a good way to regroup.
Spend 10 minutes picking up your desk/work space. I tend to let my room get cluttered and messy and out of control a lot, to the point where I know it’s going to take at least a couple hours to get it clean again. It is also hard to focus when you’re in a messy environment. I would stress myself out and be like “well i HAVE to clean my whole room because I can’t focus if my space isnt clean I cant start until I clean” and then I would put all of my productive energy into cleaning, and get maybe halfway done before burning out and going to bed.
You’re never going to get any work done if you keep in this mindset. So instead just spend 10 minutes picking up the garbage off your desk, put the dishes in the kitchen, and put things back in their place. Then you will have enough space to work on your assignment and that space will be free of clutter so it won’t be as stressful. 
DRINK WATER DRINK WATER DRINK WATER
Have a water bottle in front of you when you’re studying/in class. I get fidgety a lot when i’m in class/studying (thank u adhd) and so having a water bottle is a way for me to fidget I guess? Depending on the water bottle, you have little steps you have to do to drink that help u fidget,
for example: pick it up, take off the lid, drink, put the lid back on, set it down.
Or pick up, push button that opens drink hole (?), set back down.
When I have a water bottle on my desk it satisfies my need to do something with my body and comes with the bonus of staying hydrated, without me having to lose focus doing something else. Also you won’t get distracted by a sore throat or the realization that you are really thirsty.
Pay attention to why you’re not paying attention. Not everything that works for me is going to work for you, so you have to figure out what works for you. I started to notice that I would be uncomfortable or feel funny working when I was in baggy clothes and that helped me figure out I needed to wear real people clothes. If you find yourself getting distracted, take note of what is distracting you. maybe try literally making a list of things that distract you, so then you can identify patterns and how to combat them !
That’s all I have for now, I hope some of these could maybe help? All of these have helped me actually complete an assignment occasionally, and somehow keep my ass in college. I just want to say that my experience is my own and things that work for me aren’t going to work on every one. college can be really tough, especially your first year when you’re trying to figure everything out. I may not have all the answers but feel free to shoot me a message!! i’m here for you if you want to ramble about an assignment you’re fed up with or a teacher you hate or anything thats bothering you !! Everyone’s college (and life) experience is different so don’t feel bad if yours doesn’t look the same as the people around you ! Remember to take care of yourselves !!!
Have a good day :)
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cosmosrival · 4 years ago
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there it is! kama interlude analysis by a kama fan!
WELL. LIKE IT SAYS IN THE TITLE: this is just my own thoughts!! youre free to think whatever u want !! i am just putting my own knowledge into words because i genuinely love kama, and i would like for kama’s depth to be understood by the NA fandom a little more!! i try to stay as close as possible to their character in everything i do because i believe that the more in character they are, the funnier/more interesting content ppl will produce. 
and hopefully i understood them well ???!!!! HOPEFULLY ?!
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i will be screenshotting the translated reddit post under this read more and stop whenever something i find interesting to develop pops up ! or else it’ll get way too long lol if you wanna read the interlude for yourself heres the link!
with that said, let’s go!!
kama’s interlude begins with guda passing the hell out because of exhaustion and then waking up in a dream sequence where kama treats them to some relaxing adventures, stuff to take their mind off heavy things!! first dream sequence is kama roleplaying a highschool setting where they’re dating.
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i like this because they openly admit that its an illusion, breaking the immersion but as long as youre okay with roleplaying, they’ll continue it LOL  at some point, caesar mentions the student council president and arjuna appears behind him 
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since this is an illusion that kama made, i’ve been wondering about the fact that the way servants conduct eachother in this interlude is mostly because that’s how kama envisions they would act in a highschool setting, in an amusement park and finally with eachother (mostly for confirmed couples such as siegbryn, consort yu and her hubby etc...). suzuka and sei being gyarus is obvious, but arjuna as the student council president... is so cute???!!! i MEAN IT FITS ?! THATS A GREAT IDEA KAMA!!!! ANYWAY
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this is kama’s first monologue and since they’re primarily the god of lust, all of the more vanilla stuff they mentions such as sharing a pair of headphones embarrasses them since its so tame. ITS CUTE !!! kama expects you to be horny in class !! what are you doing thinking about hand holding !!! medusa saves u from that tho with a direct reference to her relationship with kama’s vessel 
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this is interesting !! and reassuring !!! i think that kama as a character has a lot of depth and just reducing them to “sakura” would be a waste and this interlude shows how different they are from her. but they’re also similar! sakura went through a lot just like medusa says and kama does have trauma related to shiva. its not the same circumstances but the same kind of suffering which explains the nuance here. and what i like about chaldea is that there’s been multiple instances where its been proven that servants can grow thanks to their relationships with guda (most common example: leveling up your bonds) BUT ALSO, saint graph evolution (alts). and as a kama fan i’d like to see them happy someday and this interlude as a whole is proof of their healing/coping because of the time they spent in chaldea and how they interact with others. more on that later ! here, they don’t recognize medusa which is normal since they’re not sakura (someone else entierly), but...
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they care about her ! because of sakura’s influence being a part of the servant called Kama(assassin). the difference here is important !! but i’ll come back on this in a bit. quick mention to the greek cupid <3 kamadusa nation we were fed (i clap by myself because im the only one who has 57575757557 kama rarepairs-----)
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kama is a delinquent whos horny in class but still takes a few notes, enough to do well on their tests! and thats tea<3 smart horny lazyass !! theyre a gift
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SO ARJUNA WAS OUT FOR BLOOD ????? ANYWAY, this is right after the actual fight against weirdo terrorists, and im happy to know that kama DOES enjoy a good fight (as proven in their voicelines as well) but theyre not a farming unit because it’d be too much work (single target NP..)...!!!!!!! lavish god of love.... 
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FINALLYYYYYYYYYYY THE REAL DEAL !!!!!!!!!!!! “it feels wonderful to be your girlfriend” christ, kamadeva was so used to being a husband and a good lover, it reflected in their servant version.... but ree what do u mean by servant version???
I MEAN THE OBVIOUS !! kama explains it very well in the screenie just above ! 
“You know very well how servants work.”
KAMA ASSASSIN (the servant in your chaldea) is neither KAMADEVA or SAKURA MATOU or MARA. they’re a MIX OF PARTS OF THE THREE. creating an entierly new person(in this case, servant) !!!! it might sound like i’m repeating myself, but this is important!!!!!!!!! i will say this multiple times so people remember it !!! and if u already had this figured out: GOOD JOB I LOVE U !!!
Kamadeva (the god) has many stories, ones where he was born from concepts (dharma and shraddha), one where his parents are brahma and sarasvati, one where his parents are vishnu and lakshmi, stories about his reincarnation after his death where his parents are krishna and rukmini, his love with Rati and so on. We all know Sakura’s backstory since this is nasuverse. And Mara is a demon, an entity that tried to corrupt Buddha and prevent him from reaching enlightenment/stray from the path. Kama assassin has parts from all of these entities which explains why they have a vague longing for Rati, why they have a soft spot for Medusa and why they have an affinity with Kiara(and also like talking about corrupting u !). 
they then mention how a japanese highschool setting is fun and all i have to say is: i’m gonna make an indo fam delinquent vs student council au out of this one folks !!!!!!!! i gotta !!! 
OK next
TIME FOR THE SECOND DREAM SEQUENCE WHICH I WAS VERY VERY VERRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYYY AFRAID OF BEFORE THE TRANSLATION CAME OUT.
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THE PART WHERE KAMA ACTS LIKE YOUR CHILD.
well with their stage 1 it was expected but without the translation i have to say that i was scared shitless! because people hate thinking! and even if kama clearly tells you that it’s a charade, u know a JOKE. A DREAM SEQUENCE. DONT BE A CREEP. KAMA INTENDED FOR IT TO BE WHOLESOME. i know some ppl wont use their brains. but u know its fgo and degenerates are everywhere. 
anyways. family bonding time ensues until another monologue appears!!
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exactly like before, kama mentions myths that belonged to kamadeva. Meaning that the Kama in our chaldea isn’t the Kamadeva we know and is not Pradyumna either but the fact that the writers chose to have kama acknowledge it is very reassuring !!! Because it means that they’ve chosen to make it a part of their (complicated) history. Kama says that Pradyumna is the myth about themself they know the least, once again proving us that the Kama in our Chaldea (Assassin) is a different entity and that they were summoned to the throne upon their death, the moment they were burned by Shiva’s flames and became Ananga, in any case they’re still familiar with all of their own myths. it allows us to keep heroic spirits separate from their original myths. Obviously! And in the case of pseudo-servants, it allows us to keep them separate from their vessels. Cuz this is a fanservice japanese game. Andddd the fandom likes forgetting this fact quite a lot i’ve noticed. As a person who loves thinking about tons and tons of headcanons for fun, this allows us a lot of space ! Because this is fate/grand order at its base. Nasuverse. 
I’m glad that the interlude explains it so clearly, it’s very good !! Because the majority of myths from every culture are confusing, family trees are confusing, names are confusing, powers and attributes are confusing... its a mess !!!! the fgo characters we know are just cut from their own respective timelines/historial figures so the writers can organize themselves more easily. Like cutting halves from a big cake. Kama (Assassin) is the Kama that died from Shiva’s flames and became the universe ONLY. In Nasuverse, Arthur Pendragon is a woman. Anastasia Romanov NEVER had a demon familiar named Viy in real life despite the creature being part of russian folklore. u know ! im russian i can testify dude !! 
hopefully everyone got this bc i wont be explaining this any further dude, its exhausting !!!!!! bangs my hands on the table !!!!! 
ANYWAYS kama mentions “eternal pain that turns [them] into ash” being their key element. Their trauma is at the center of their heroic spirit self, what they are as a servant. This suffering is tied to everything they do, why they’re so lazy, why they’re so lax, why they’re so detached from their job.  But they’re not detached from their role. And “job” and “role” have different connotations here. They refuse to work as a cupid because of obvious reasons. BUT. They’re not detached from their role as the God of Love, as the God of Passion. The embodiment of those feelings. This whole interlude is proof ! They’re giving u free therapy because they Love you. Passion. They feel your love. Passion. They acknowledge how much fun you’re having. How passionate you are about certain things. They might seem extremely detached and hateful, but they aren’t. They’re one of the most empathetic servants there is. And their ability to love everything, even the things they hate is what makes them so miserable. Because it’s a part of them. Because the concept of Kama in hinduism is linked to them. Be it lust or simply the passion born from anything you do where you’re enjoying yourself. (quote:  “ the term also refers to any sensory enjoyment, emotional attraction and aesthetic pleasure such as from arts, dance, music, painting, sculpture and nature “. R. Prasad (2008), History of Science, Philosophy and Culture in Indian Civilization )
... I’d like to say that this contrast with Mara is interesting. And that i’m glad the writers chose to add in Mara to the kama assassin Beast mix. 
Because the anger Mara feels can become a drivepoint for Kama. I’ve always believed that anger and sadness are two sides of the same coin, it’d explain how layered Kama is and how valid their emotions are. Constantly torn between love and hate. An eternal grudge (i don’t deserve to be hurt like this) and an eternal misery(maybe i do deserve to be hurt like this). 
i wish they were my roommate <3 oh fuck ree got emotional wait where were we.
OH YEAH
i think kama saying that they dislike being involved with other indian servants because theyre linked to shiva is a feeble attempt at trying to keep up a strong front because they still love them in the end. cuz that’s how kama is ! after a while they’ll get bored of bullying ganesha and ashwatthama. they’ll get interested in rama because their respective mythos are linked even if their servant selves have no connection. hell, at the end of the interlude they talk about parvati and how they themself changed and realized things. BUT OH WELL, THATS STUFF FOR ANOTHER POST HEHE thats just ree wanting kama to b happy yall move along !!
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.....THIS ISNT A COLLEGE STUDENTS ROLEPLAY BUT ITS A CUTE JAPANESE COMPANY BOSS/UNDERLING SETTING AND ITS CUTE SO I THINK KAMA WEARING A PENCIL SKIRT AND POURING U ALCOHOL IS CUTE. CUTE.
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further proof of kama’s overflowing affection and what i detailed above!! hopefully u all knew this one simply from reading this interlude/their profile page and dont need me to write it down for u. HOPEFULLY !!!!!
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(I START BEATBOXING VERY RAPIDLY AND RUNNING TOWARDS YOU) KAMA IS A SADIST AT THEIR CORE AND I WILL NEVER STOP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they’re easy to fluster because theyre not used to being so vanilla, but whats underneath is how they truly are !! a beast turned servant, the sweetest sadist !! theyre very mature and this interlude is so well written (wipes my teears
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this is directly linked to what i explained above, by burning you away, you’ll melt into nothingness just like they did. When they were the universe, they felt both everything and nothing. 
But was it really relief ... ?
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... IT WASNT.
AND PARVATI SAVES THE DAY !!!!!!! phew!! thank u paru, it’d still like to be able to touch kama’s huge titties and i cant do that if i turn into ashes (falls down the stairs
ok she summoned lovey dovey canon couples to annoy kama since they’re exhausted of seein them!!
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...............(I TAKE OUT A KNIFE) TAKE THAT BACK. DONT TALK TO THEM LIKE THAT. TAKE THAT BACK !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
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ohhhhhh im obsessed i love when theyre angry<3 i love when theyre fighty <3 i think they should beat the living shit out of a boxing bag DAILY to let out some of this steam. they’d be a monster on the ring... aaa kama in training boot y shorts aa a .. .uughg hg ouu... (you all shove me into a locker)
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ok this is interesting !! i think that the interlude showing us that parvati feels a semblance of guilt is character dev. proof for what i mentioned before!! in ookuu parvati felt quite ..unsympathetic to me, even if kama is a beast who wants to annihilate humanity, when u think about it, at their core their grudge is because of her and shiva’s betrayal. and here, she properly apologizes for making kama so upset. this is heartwarming to me since i dislike thinking that members of the indo fam hate eachother :( same goes for arjuna and karna, at some point i’d like for them to act like bros normally and finally be comfy. but anyways !!
u wake up from the dreams and da vinci, mashu and paru are here to tell u whats going on. But its fine bc u remember everything and u have to go thank someone for helping u out!!!
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CUTE !!!!!!! THEY CARE ABOUT U !!!!!! but whether it be because of their role or because theres a deeper meaning is entierly up to your own interpretation because...
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of what they say here. 
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and here !! 
ohhhhhhhhh this is so important !!!!!!
this is actual proof of kama’s growth as a servant and how servants evolve in chaldea !! chaldea is not the same as a grail war, its a special, cut-off place and thats what makes it even more relaxing to think about. Everytime u summon a servant in ur chaldea u give them a chance to have fun with you, to have fun with other servants, to make amends, to start from scratch, to discover things they would’ve never known in their time (movies, video games, tons of different foods etc...), u give them a chance to relax. to grow !! this is the headcanon that im most attached to and im glad to see it be confirmed in the interlude of a character i love tbqh i had to stop and talk about that.
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everyone say thank u kama !! can we roleplay a college roommate coffee shop slowburn au next time <3 
ANYWAYS if you’ve read it this far: thank you !!! im sorry if you expected something very serious, im not that type of person hehe im jus here to have fun and look at things i like, and the interlude itself was quite lighthearted and refreshing. By talking about the myths and all of kamadeva’s stories, the writers basically gave lore nerds a huge thumbs up like... “its ok now !! u can go ape now !! go be insane<3 love u<3″ and all of this kama characterization GENUINELY makes me so happy because i think they really needed that. kama assassin... (i blow a kiss to the sky) is a little mess of a servant... a god, human crumbs and a demon... a total mess... im in love with them...
..............tho now the wait for a summer alt where they interact with the entire indo fam begins (im sitting in a chair unmoving)(i have a gun in case minase begins acting gross
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glitterblazercalum · 4 years ago
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got a river for a soul, and baby, you’re a boat
or:  Oh, fuck. We showed up wearing matching couples’ costumes to this party by accident and now everyone thinks we’re together.” + cashton
hello and happy halloween everyone!! giant thank u to ainslee @ashesonthefloor for putting this event together!! and for forcing me to actually get this fic done, looking it over, and generally being a major source of serotonin in my life. another huge thank u to bella @clumsyclifford for being one of my favorite people and loving frat boys enough that it made me want to write a fic about them to annoy her <3 love you both <3 
here is the link to the event masterpost bc I highly recommend checking out all of the other amazing fics: 
https://ashesonthefloor.tumblr.com/post/633534107120549888/hello-welcome-to-my-halloween-fic-event
warnings: mentions of alcohol
word count: 2,872
without further ado, please enjoy the fic I wrote mostly all last night while looping drag me down for thirteen hours straight :))
Calum doesn’t know what fuckhead came up with the idea of having a joint Halloween party for Sigma Nu and Sigma Pi this year, but he really wants to fight them. He thinks he’d probably have a lot of people on his side, considering how much Sig Nu and and Sig Pi hate each other, so he tucks the idea of interfraternity war away in his head as a contingency plan in case the party goes to shit, as joint parties with any other frat always seem to. And it’s not like it’s a one night thing, because all three days of the “Halloweekend,” as Michael refuses to stop calling it, are supposedly going to be spent with Sig Nu, one party at their own house, and two at the shithole that he assumes is the Sig Nu house, in some deranged attempt at bonding. He’ll be lucky to make it out alive, probably. 
Before college, he really never did anything of his own for Halloween, mainly used to being used as a prop or side character for his sister Mali-Koa’s elaborate costumes, or, after she’d moved out, sticking a pair of fake fangs in his mouth to hand out candy to the few kids who rang the doorbell despite his efforts to keep all the lights in the house off. Last year, as a freshman, he’d gotten roped into a group costume with some of the other Sig Pi pledges, and while his memories are...hazy at best, he vaguely remembers falling asleep in a Teletubbies onesie at the end of the night. 
This year, though, no one has tried to tell him what to dress up as, so it’s now a few hours before the first of the three parties, and Calum still has no ideas for what he should dress up as. A quick Google search for “cheap easy costumes” hadn’t really been all that helpful, so he decides to ignore the problem and take a nap until he actually has to leave. 
A few hours later, Michael barges into the room to drag him out of bed, and looks around for a few seconds before asking, “You don’t have a costume, do you?”
Calum groans, pulling himself out of bed and wracking his brain for an idea that he can plausibly bullshit in the next few seconds, because he can’t let Michael be right and have something to tease him about, so he blurts, “I’m going to be a salt shaker.” 
Michael gapes at him a bit for a few seconds before asking, “What the fuck? What kind of costume is that? What are you even going to wear for that?” 
Calum mentally kicks himself in the shin, as hard as possible, because he really hasn’t thought this through. Why couldn’t he have just said cat or cowboy or something even slightly in the realm of normal Halloween costumes? 
“Uhhh.. y’know that baseball tee I have? The one with the black sleeves and white middle?” 
“I’m pretty sure that’s in my closet, but continue.” 
“What the fuck, dude? Give it back!” 
“You haven’t noticed that it’s missing for like three weeks, I just assumed it was mine now. Tell me what the rest of the costume is,” Michael demands. 
“I’ll just tape a piece of paper with a big ‘S’ on it to the front of my shirt, and then put one of those pots with the holes on my head. Bam! Salt shaker!” Calum says, moderately impressed with his ability to pull stuff out of his ass this quickly. 
“What makes you think we even have a colander?” Michael asks, crossing his arms. 
Calum gives him a blank stare. “A what?” 
“That’s what the pots with the holes are called, you idiot.” 
“You think Harry would live anywhere that didn’t have a fully-stocked kitchen? There’s bound to be one in one of the cabinets or something.” 
“Fine. I’ll go get the shirt while you look for the colander.” Before Calum can object, suggest that he look through Michael’s closet himself and steal back any of his other clothes that have somehow wound up there, Michael’s already halfway down the hallway. 
Sighing, he trudges down the stairs towards the kitchen, where one of the seniors, Niall, is sitting with his head in his hands, dressed as a pirate. 
“Hey, dude, nice costume,” Calum offers as a greeting. “You wouldn’t happen to know where I can find a colander, would you? I know Harry—” 
“Do not talk to me about Harry right now,” Niall says, and Calum stops his search for a moment to send him a concerned look.
“What happ—” 
“That needy-ass motherfucker thinks that just because I didn’t want to do a couples’ costume with him, it means I don’t love him anymore! Never mind the fact that he literally mentioned this idea to me yesterday, well past the point where everyone finalizes their costumes.” 
Calum offers him a sympathetic look and offers, “Couples’ costumes are boring and cheesy anyways. Neither of you are missing out on anything, at least in my opinion.”
Niall lifts his head up from where he’d been repeatedly hitting it on the table to smirk at Calum and ask, “Have a lot of experience with couples’ costumes, do you?” 
Luckily, Calum has finally found the colander, so he opts to ignore the question and just leave the kitchen entirely. 
When he gets back upstairs, Michael’s in his room, unabashedly checking himself out in the mirror that’s on the back of the closet door. “Yeah, yeah, your anime character of the year looks great, now get out and let me get ready.” 
Michael scoffs, “Get ready, as if you’re even doing anything,” but moves towards the door anyway. 
Michael’s right, the costume is ridiculously easy to throw together, and two minutes later, they’re both out the door, walking across Fraternity Row to get to the Sig Nu house, where the music is already blaring and strobe lights throw red, then green, then blue shadows across everyone’s faces. On his way to the kitchen to grab a drink, he sees Niall and Harry walk into the house, holding hands and laughing together, so he assumes that their fight has blown over as quickly as all of their other fights always seem to.
He sees a few different trays of shots and decides he might as well take one to get the night started off right. After, he realizes that he probably shouldn’t grab a beer now, Mali’s rule about sticking to one color of booze for the night ringing in his head, so he settles for filling up a Solo cup with whatever glow in the dark gin concoction is in all the punch bowls. He wouldn’t put it past the Sig Nus to poison the drink on purpose, but it tastes relatively normal, so he grabs another cup for Michael and attempts to leave the kitchen, steering around the couple sloppily making out in the doorway. 
It’s harder to spot Michael than it usually is, considering that at least half the people at the party are wearing some type of wig, but Calum eventually makes his way back over to him. He’s talking to Niall and Harry, and they both offer him a smile before continuing on with the conversation. Once that reaches a lull, Niall leans closer to Calum and says, “Mate, you didn’t need to lie to me about couples’ costumes.” 
Calum has no idea what Niall is talking about, so he shakes his head and asks, “What are you talking about?” 
Niall cackles, and Harry turns to look at him adoringly before going back to talking to Michael, and Calum is more confused than ever. Niall grabs his shoulder and spins him around and points in the direction of a clump of people. “You’re salt and he’s pepper, right? That’s such an obvious couples’ costume, although you two do seem to have a bit of a disconnect on how much effort you put in. That guy really went all out. And dude, why haven’t you told us that you have a boyfriend? You know we’d want to know about that, give him the Sig Pi seal of approval and all that. Wait. Unless he’s a Sig Nu, in which case, I don’t want to know because I’d probably have to kick you out. That’s a joke, by the way.” 
Calum barely has the presence of mind to mumble, “He’s not my boyfriend,” before crossing the room to get to the guy in the hyper-realistic pepper grinder costume. 
The guy smiles as Calum approaches, and despite the costume covering most of his body, Calum can tell that he’s cute. “Why so salty?” Pepper Guy greets, the sunshiney smile still on his face. 
Calum smirks and replies, “Maybe I just need some more spice in my life.” Pepper Guy laughs, and just like everything else about him, it’s cute, and Calum wants to hear it again. “I’m Calum, by the way.”
“Ashton. Nice to meet you, man.” 
Calum leans a little closer so that it’s easier to hold a conversation over the loud music and asks, “What’s the deal with the super realistic pepper grinder costume?” 
Ashton makes a strange noise, somewhere between a laugh and a groan, and says, “I got it off some random sketchy website, but it was supposed to be a chess piece. Something clearly went wrong somewhere in production, and my friend Luke said that I might as well sharpie a “P” onto it and just go with it.” 
Calum makes a noise of agreement, mind stuck on a dumb idea. Before he can reconsider, he sends Michael a quick text that says if u’ve already taken over as dj, can u play that come grind w me song? and a few seconds later, he hears the opening notes and grins. 
“Hey, Ashton?” 
“Yeah?” Ashton replies, as realization slips across his face.
Right in time with the singer’s voice, Calum says, “Come grind with me,” and he laughingly pulls Ashton towards the makeshift dance floor. Neither of them can really dance, so it’s a mess of laughter and limbs flopping around, but Calum feels an unmistakable electricity between them too, and once the song is over, they stay for the next few, enraptured by each other. When they finally exhaust themselves with all the laughing and mock-twerking, Ashton asks Calum if he wants a refill, and when Calum nods, he grabs his hand and starts pulling him towards the kitchen. 
Once they’re there, Calum goes for another serving of the glow in the dark punch, which is steadily dimming as the glow sticks run out of light. Since that’s really the only light source in the kitchen, Calum doesn’t see Ashton until he’s turning around and Ashton is right in front of him, reaching around him for a cup. Calum’s kind of trapped with his back against the counter, Ashton’s pepper grinder costume tall enough to really block out the view of the rest of the party, and the world narrows, all of it contained in where their eyes connect, and then, after Calum has safely set his drink back on the counter, that narrow point expands just a bit to where their mouths land on each other’s. The colander gets knocked off Calum’s head as he lifts himself up to sit on the counter, wrapping his legs around Ashton’s waist to pull him closer, as close as he can possibly get him. 
Ashton’s sucking a mark into Calum’s neck when Calum has his first coherent thought of the past few minutes and pulls back, breathlessly asking “Wait, wait, you’re not a Sig Nu, are you?” fully expecting the answer to be no.
Ashton steps back a little too, and it takes him a second to register the question before he groans, “Of course you’re a fucking Sig Pi, that’s the only explanation that makes sense for me never seeing you anywhere before. You’re too hot for me to not notice otherwise.” 
Calum flushes and mentally curses out whatever idiots had started the rivalry between Sig Nu and Sig Pi before he grabs his stupid colander off the ground and gives Ashton an awkward wave goodbye.  
Once he’s out of the kitchen, he quickly glances around in search of Michael, and when he can’t immediately find him, he just gives up and leaves entirely. Fuck Sig Nu. 
He spends most of the next day bitching about his hangover, and then, a few hours later, bitching about his hangover while helping to set up the house for that night’s party. 
He doesn’t really have much more of a costume for tonight, throwing on a gray shirt and sharpie-ing some whiskers on his face. Michael takes pity on him and makes him a headband with an approximation of what they both think mouse ears are, and Calum is mildly entertained by going up to everyone and saying, “I’m a mouse, duh.” 
His heart’s really not in the right place to party tonight, which is probably breaking the cardinal rule of being in a frat, so he sticks close to Michael, who has taken over the role of DJ, once again. Zayn from Alpha Sig strolls over after about half an hour, devil horns askew, and quietly says to Calum, “Cat and mouse, huh? Didn’t think you had it in you, Hood, that’s proper cute. Not as cute as me and Lou, mind you, but still, I respect the effort.” 
Calum is reluctant to look up and see who he’s accidentally matching with today, because, with his luck, it’s probably another guy from Sig Nu. When he does eventually look up, he immediately makes eye contact with Ashton, who happens to be walking by, dressed in all black and with whiskers sharpie’d onto his face too. Calum wants to bang his head into a wall because the universe clearly hates him if it’s having him match with Ashton again. Even beyond that, Ashton looks so good out of the stupid pepper grinder and in all black that Calum wants to make out with him again. 
Ashton is clearly having similar thoughts when he gestures Calum over and leads them towards a little pocket of quiet space in one of the lesser used hallways. 
Calum really wants to hook his thumb into one of Ashton’s belt loops, so he does, as Ashton looks him up and down a few times. “Is the mouse costume your way of telling me you want me to chase you?” 
Calum murmurs, “Shut up,” before leaning in to kiss him, frat rivalry be damned. It’s just as good as it was the night before, maybe even more so, now that the pepper costume isn’t in their way. At this point, there’s no denying the chemistry. It can’t be blamed on being drunk since Calum’s been nursing the same beer all night, and the part of his brain that’s protesting against being this close to a Sig Nu is getting smaller and smaller as he and Ashton continue to kiss. 
They stay in that hallway for the rest of the night, eventually sliding down to sit on the ground, legs pressed together, sharing stupid stories about their respective frats. Calum’s surprised when the music shuts off because it feels like it’s only been an hour at most, that’s how easy it is to talk to Ashton. Ashton heaves himself up and reaches both hands down to help Calum up, too. 
“I don’t think there’s any way you can match your costume to mine tomorrow, but I’ll come find you anyways,” Ashton says, as he leaves Calum with a kiss on the cheek. 
Calum’s too wired to sleep much, so he opts to help clean up the house instead, and that takes up enough of his day that when nighttime rolls around, he’s stood staring at his closet without a costume idea for the third time in as many days. After ten minutes of consideration, he digs through one of his drawers to pull out the fake vampire fangs that he had somehow remembered to bring with him, and he goes down the hall to ask Jack to put some fake blood on his mouth and neck. Jack always goes all out for Halloween. 
Once he’s at the party, he doesn’t have to wait long to find Ashton, who looks incredibly good in his werewolf costume. There’s fake blood on him too, which is really the only way their costumes could be understood to be matching, or so Calum thinks. Tonight, Jack and Alex are the ones to tease him, “You know what, I agree. Jacob and Edward should have ended up together, Bella was boring as shit.” 
Calum’s really not bothered by the comments at all, so much so that he’s already thinking of couples’ costumes ideas for next year when he finds his way over to Ashton and whispers, “Let’s get out of here.” 
“Are you trying to make a move on me? I’m a respectable Sigma Nu, I don’t know if I can allow that.” 
 Calum laughs and tugs him out the door, “Told you I wanted some more spice in my life.” 
32 notes · View notes
urmomification · 4 years ago
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SWAG ANOTHER DREAM SMP AU FIC IDEA THAT ILL NEVER WRITE POG
this is a very long post please im so sorry my brain it just
(tw for like slight possession n shit)
(sorry its all jumbled i write all of these in discord to my friend and copy paste them here please if u have questions ask me im always willing to talk abt this shit please it haunts me)
(context: i saw a tiktok abt the hc that both dream and techno are gods of some sort bc theyre mentioned in the tales of the smp by karl a time traveller and my brain just ran w it)
going back to the techno and dream are gods thing right so dream is a vessel for the god dream xd (??? work in progress youll know what im talking about at some point its really funny tho uve def seen clips of it) and he was possessed?? by the god after the server started (when he started going from super friendly with everyone to control/power hungry) when he started sacrificing everything for power so no one could have power over him? that was the god making him do it bc the god was terrified of not being in control since theyd lost it all to techno in their past. thats why we never see dream and techno fight and why we see dream extend help and support to him at times as well as respecting his boundaries and such bc theyre scared of techno (again w the best of 10 duel reference, techno killed the god in a past life which is why the god has been forced to use a human vessel to get anything done on the mortal plane) but when something that powerful spends pretty much any amount of time in something mortal and mundane like a person, the host body starts to change (hence the mask) i like to think that the god would be akin to that of a biblically correct angel?? like the ones w multiple eyes n shit yk so after time things start to happen to normal dreams body he gets extra sets of eyes and he gets taller and overall his body seems just Too Small for whatevers inside of him and thats why he (hc) started wearing the mask in the first place he knew something was wrong w him but he didnt want anyone to know even tho they would most likely help him he was ashamed that he was different in the first place so he started wearing the mask once the other eyes showed up. and i think that the god would talk to dream similarly to how technos voices work yk? except its just the one voice instead of many many small ones. and again with the mask thing when he lost to tommy and they took him in, part of his mask broke to the point where u could see just a bit of the right side of his face but enough to see that it Wasnt Right there were two eyes where there shouldve been one and spots on his cheeks bright enough to resemble stars and where the color of his pupil should have been is just a sickeningly neon green with nothing else behind it. so they let him keep the mask even tho they already know something is wrong but it clearly makes him Very Distressed when asked to remove the mask or told to give it up. blah blah blah god harassing its host bc it got them caught and thrown in a prison and dream goes ever so slightly insane having to share a mind and body with a literal ancient god w a vendetta against everything hes built whos forced him to sacrifice everything he loved and cared for out of fear yk the usual prison shit and then techno comes a long and breaks him out or whatever but on their way back to his house he drops a really cryptic line abt how 'its nice to see an old friend again' and 'i thought i got rid of u for good last time' and dream is just ???? what are u talking about?? weve never been friends and youve never gotten rid of me? what. until techno spins around and just 'im not talking to you im talking to the thing inside u' or whatever and dreams eyes flash some brilliant gold or sumn and boom this is ur fellow god speaking how may i help you and dream xd (that feels so wrong to say but) and techno bond or well ig just talk abt how the past centuries have gone and ig while xd is fronting (??? i think itd kinda be like DID in a sense w multiple people being able to front yk?) dream is in a sort of semi conscious state but still hears everything going on around his own body until hes thrown back into the drivers seat (i think that xd would only be able to front for short periods of time due to the vessel n shit that makes sense right) and hes so confused someone please help him hes just a dude who happened to get possessed by a god someone help him so when they finally get back to technos house he sits dream down and explains the best he can without literally melting dreams brain. which would also play into the 'technoblade never dies' bc hes. literally a god. mortals cant kill him unless they have idk some sort of super weapon idk and blah blah blah xd gets what they want and finally has the ability to leave finally leaving dream literally the shell of a man with no home friends materials or anything with techno to basically take care of him until he reaches some semblance of stability again (which would take ages, realistically (wdym realistically) going from normal, to a god sharing a body with you and speaking in you brain living as a single being together and hearing their thoughts, to back to normal but with all the memories of what you did and what they made you do and also no more god speaking in ur head it would take a hot sec to recover from) so he lives with techno (whos, not to mention, another god) for a while until he can fend for himself again and after a good year or so passes and no one hears from dream they start to look for him and see what happened bc he went from the biggest threat on the server to just. gone. no one knows where he went after whatever he did and they want closure. is he dead?? who knows. so george and sap set out looking for him and decide to ask techno for help since hes good w directions n shit also he was the last person to see dream alive so he might have an idea of where he is and they walk up to his house and knock on his door and techno opens it and just stares at them he knows who they are, dreams talked about them before but hes never met them really so he talks to them, getting through the polite hellos how are yous before sap finally asks 'do you know what happened to dream? no one knows where he went and we just want closure' techno huffs and tells them to wait there he (this is the basement door im using his arctic tundra house in my head) goes down the ladder to the second basement, they can hear him talking to multiple people (ranboo phil dream) but cant tell who everyone is before coming back up the ladder, back to the door. he tells them to wait outside he needs to get something first (its dream hes getting dream) theyre standing out by carls stable when the door creaks open and dream steps out looking around for who the fuck could possibly be looking for them he betrayed everyone and most people thought he was dead who could possibly be here asking for himself and not ranboo or philza and when he steps out, his green hoodie (memento made by ranboo to help him cope w the loss of the voice in his head) catching the morning light off the snow and he was happy and then he saw them standing by the house hed grown to call home at least for now he breaks. he missed them so so much it hurt. he never expected to see them ever again much less them come looking to see him but hes scared he realizes he doesnt know what to say there is nothing to say he fucked them all over he ruined everything and then hes being hugged. they missed him too. they dont forgive him jsut yet but they missed him and thats enough for him right now. the three of them stand there just being in each others presences and techno creaks the door open to make sure they arent trying to kill each other and sighs and leans against the frame smiling. hes happy again and thats the best he can do for him. he invites them all in and offers to explain everything to them to try and ease the blame off of dream bc in all honesty it was his fault but xd made it far far worse that it should have been (a bit late but foot note abt xd i think that they would be an idle god until someone w intense feelings of powerlessness and insecurity like awoke them from their techno induced slumber and inhabited dream to help him fulfill his desires for power and control) and by the time he and dream are finished its late at night and sap and george are ??? so u were possessed by a god who techno killed centuries ago in a duel and it amplified ur feelings of insecurity and ur thirst for control to the point of isolating urself from us and destroying everything everyone cared abt?? also technos an ancient god who lusts for bloodshed but also makes turtle farms in his free time?? are we getting this right????? and techno and dream are just yea thats abt it glad this all made sense then they all go to bed (its a small house dream has a lil shack like ranboos and sap and george somehow slept over there for the night) and in the morning sap and george leave again but promise to come back, they still arent ready to forgive and forget bc even tho it wasnt all his fault his emotions getting away from him is what caused this all in the first place so they do need time to process now that they know he isnt dead and dream continues to live near techno in almost full independence and eventually moves back with his friends even tho many still hate him. hes happy and for now thats enough. another foot note; even after xd leaves his being, he still has the extra eyes, glowy freckles n is xtra tall n shit that cant just be reversed but now that hes himself again these things take their tolls on human bodies so i think hed have something at least similar to arthritis bc of how his bones were literally manipulated bc of how strong ethereal magic or whatever is. so he would still wear the broken mask but he takes it off now and is ok with it being off hes working on getting better now that hes himself again and everyone living w/by techno is helping him with that. also i think that he would get blinks of xd's memories like from when techno was killing them and have sumn like ptsd panic attacks from it and techno feels super guilty abt it but theres literally nothing he can do except apologize and after the first few times dream stopped him from apologizing bc it is his fault but he didnt do it to him so it doesnt matter to dream at least and they live in pretty much harmony until dream finally moves back in w george and sap the end. he also started wearing the mask in the first place bc of the extra eyes but he played it off as being uncomfortable around new people and not wanting them to know what he looked like until he trusted them (bc that literally makes sense irl how funky is that) so sap and george never pushed him and when they caught him without it on on the rare occasion they wouldnt pressure him to leave it off or anything even tho they already knew what he looked like (when they respect ur boundaries </3) they just assumed that it was insecurity (it was but also mans had like 3 eyes so) and just left him alone
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bloopbyoop · 4 years ago
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weep woop
ayo. ive read my scheduled email and its time for freewriting shit again. lmao. I want this post to be like a small light from a lit match stick inside a very hollow, icy, and numbing cave. (sounds cartoonish right? I know. Im obsessed with Adventure Time.) I want all people to be genuinely happy.  Spiritually, emotionally, and physically. Upon reaching my 24th anniversary in this world, I finally learned how to truly embrace all my emotions. Some are more overwhelming than the other, but we have to heed in our treacherous yet perplexing minds that everything is fleeting and we are in control. The feeling of extreme sadness fades, but so does joyful states. Everything can change in a matter of minutes or years. You are in control of all your emotions. You are in control of all your life choices. Your actions. Your words. Your perspective. It feels weird to actually write about it. I've wanted to talk about it. I never wanted help from anyone as I firmly believed that I was alone. Sure, I have a family and friends, but it is hard to see that when your head is clouded with negativity. I've even come to the point where I was too overwhelmed, I found being physically hurt less painful. The pain I felt distracted me from what I was thinking. My mind tended to go bonkers. lmao. But bro, I was so good at concealing my bonkers mind. It's easy to fake any emotion that you have. Slap anything sunshine-y or happy to anything and people would believe you. It went on for years. Long story short, thousands of bracelets collected, it became worse. The physical pain could no longer withhold the emotional pain. Couldn't sleep. Couldn't stop thinking. And voila! I found a good amount of self help books (from tumblr) and novels. Novels that brought me to different places. Self-help books that made me understand what I feel and what to do. I've read that taking the easy way out will leave everyone sad. AND IN THE FIRST PLACEEEEEE, I NEVER WANT THATTTTTTT. I want everyone to be happy. I would act foolish and do dumb shit to make everyone happy in a heartbeat. So, that idea made me push a few more years. Later on, the crippling shit came crawling back again to my head, sooooooo I needed new shit to keep me distracted again. Films, series, music, and short clips from YouTube helped me out a lot. Every single time that my mind is going to think like anything that can think of, even to the point that I was just going to think that I might be hungry, I'd watch something. There's just something about silence for me. Because of this new habit of mine, I've learned more about myself. I love different types of things. I like horror. I like thriller. I like comedy. I like romance. I love all types of films, but there is something about the horror genre that interests me. I still can't point out what, but I love watching horror films. With regards to music, I've learned that I love Indie, Punk Rock, Rap, and Pop. We all can't like a specific genre. It's stupid to ask "what genre of music do you like?". It's not actually stupid-stupid, it's just stupid. Ya know? Anyway, passing this phase, I needed to find something again because it's not doing the shit that it was supposed to, I tried investing more time on video games. By investing more, I mean a whole shit lot. I love video games since I was young cuz.... u know.... they keep u... try to guess it! oh yeah. you got that right! distracted! I love the aggressive plays and trashtalks that my friends and I make. The short stories we tell one another. The rants. The lame jokes. The late night we sound drunk but we are not drunk jokes. The roleplays. The lame jokes. The memes. And once again, The lame jokes. Something about lame jokes and the laughs and curses after that always gets me every single time. Oh shoot. Yup Yup. Few years later, I finally noticed the pattern that my sadness is temporary. I got over it one way or the other (or another. depends on how you wanna read it. i dont wanna say another cause i might write about one direction like what im doing now so-). Happiness is temporary as well. But, we are the ones who are actually in control of our emotions. If you wanna feel sad, be sad for a while. You're getting too sad? Try hanging out with your funny friends. Can't do that? Find an alternative. Watch a movie, knit a sweater. Anything your mind could think of as long as it will keep you mentally distracted from being physically and mentally hurt. I do have a few notes though. We cannot and should never assume what people are going through. It may be petty for you, but it may be very crucial to them. So never everrrr say things like: -Some people have it worse than you -At least you have ..... These sheetsss are annoying as heckkk and could really down someone. I know it is not your intention to annoy but people react differently. alsooooooo, it is not okay or normal to hate on things for bandwagon. that is just plainly crazy and stupid. let people enjoy things. anddddddd never suppress your emotions. admit what you feel inside and try to think of a way to resolve ittttt. keeping it to yourself will just make it worseeeeee. find your own outlettttttttt. hihihi ️ alsooooo. being more spiritually full with God's words and ideas really help me to be spiritually happy. ps. im christian but i dont discredit other religion and even applaud other religion's ideas and beliefs. this is a really long, selfish post so i might as well recommend some things I like : Songs with their lyrics that made me go through life. “I’ve got soul but I’m not a soldier” -All These Things That I've Done, The Killers “It's not too late, I'm still right here” -Breaking Your Own Heart, Kelly Clarkson "And the salt in my wounds / Isn't burning any more than it used to / It's not that I don't feel the pain / It's just I'm not afraid of hurting anymore / And the blood in these veins / Isn't pumping any less than it ever has / And that's the hope I have / The only thing I know that's keeping me alive" -Last Hope, Paramore “There is not a single word in the whole world / That could describe the hurt / The dullest knife just sawing back and forth / And ripping through the softest skin there ever was / How were you to know?” -Hate to See Your Heartbreak, Paramore "It's holding on, though the road's long / And seeing light in the darkest things And when you stare at your reflection / Finally knowing who it is / I know that you'll thank God you did" -1800, Logic "Did some things you can't speak of / But at night you live it all again / You wouldn't be shattered on the floor now / If only you had seen what you know now then" -Innocent, Taylor Swift (My bb) "10 months sober, I must admit / Just because you're clean don't mean you don't miss it / 10 months older, I won't give in / Now that I'm clean I'm never gonna risk it // Rain came pouring down when I was drowning / That's when I could finally breathe / And by morning gone was any trace of you, I think I am finally clean" -Clean, Taylor Swift “I guess I always knew / That I had all the strength to make it through.” -Believe in Me, Demi Lovato "I'm addicted to the madness / I'm a daughter of the sadness / I've been here too many times before / Been abandoned and I'm scared now / I can't handle another fallout / I am fragile, just washed upon the shore / They forget me, don't see me / When they love me, they leave me" -I Hate You, Don’t Leave Me, Demi Lovato “I'm overwhelmed / I need a voice to echo / I need a light to take me home / I need a star to follow / I don't know” -Nightingale, Demi Lovato "I'm a walking travesty / But I'm smiling at everything. // Arrogant boy, Love yourself so no one has to." -Therapy, All Time Low "I tried it once before but I didn't get too far / I felt a lot of pain but it didn't stop my heart. / But maybe I'm alive 'cause I didn't really wanna die / But nothing very special ever happens in my life / Take the blade away from me I am a freak, I am afraid that / All the blood escaping me won't end the pain / And I'll be haunting all the lives that cared for me / I died to be the white ghost / Of the man that I was meant to be" -Ghost, Badflower "Are the pieces of you / In the pieces of me? / I'm just so scared / You're who I'll be / When I erupt / Just like you do / They look at me / Like I look at you" -DNA, Lia Marie Johnson Movies and series to try : -The Perks of Being a Wallflower (The book is bomb af. if yall havent tried, ur missing out) -The Kings of Summer -Never Let Me Go -The Art of Getting By -Silver Linings Playbook -Winter’s Bone -The Lovely Bones (The script. The words) -Me and Earl and the Dying Girl -American Horror Story -Black Swan
pps. remember that every one has their own pace and point of view. don’t push yourself too hard, and don’t overthink. give yourself time, and respect all your emotions. analyze them but not more than like 5 minutes as anything beyond that might cause you to overthink and be sadder. and sad is not rad. hehe. you got this. you got you. self love is the best even though it can be tricky to do. nobody else is like you. you’re the only one of you (i just remembered me.......... i might have hummed it while typing it mid sentence). consider other people’s opinion but do not let it cloud your own judgement as you know yourself best. dont let other comment’s define you. spread love. vibe people you vibe with. ayeeee lets go!!! 
ppps this is my last post bc im happier now and know myself better. i no longer limit myself on the age that I want. I want to live as long as how God wants me to be. hehe. 
x :D
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jksangelic · 6 years ago
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defanged (m)
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↳ rating: M
↳ genre: smut, fluff, werewolf!au, a/b/o au, pwp
↳ pairing: mates werewolf!reader x werewolf/alpha!hoseok
↳ warnings: explicit sexual content, dom themes, breathplay, knotting, rough play, impregnation kink, overall general ”werewolf” smut themes, personality change, probably an uncomfortable amount of squishy mate talk
↳ summary:  hoseok is an easy mate—as such that there are moments you question if he’s just human. so when his sudden spike of aggression emerges, you do your best to keep this unknown man at bay. or, alternatively: young alpha hoseok has started teething and he’s being a bratty puppy about it.
↳ note: ok so if you were with me a few months ago you would know that this is actually a collab fic with a couple other writers but life happens and here we are now *cowboy emoji*. this is really important to me bc they’re such *clench fist* great people and i’m happy i received such an opportunity to collab with them (’: pls make sure to rb/like/visit our collab masterlist if you want to be in-the-know of when they post their parts!
also i wanted to play around with the humorous sides of what werewolves might go thru (-: so, like, short attention spans and hating loud noises and typical big dog stuff. with the teething, just imagine that their growth stages are prolonged because they’re, idk, maybe immortal or something lol
(i…… i’m not used to writing fantasy can u tell)
((gif isn’t mine + his side profile ;-;))
↳ words: 9k+
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You could hear every miniscule thread snap and unwind from themselves, a simple task such as painting your nails becoming less relaxing than it should be.
“Hobi,” you mumble once. You swipe down your thumb again, carmine red smoothing over brightly and with utmost delicacy. He doesn’t listen, another squeaking grind of his teeth against the material of his sweatshirt followed by a snapsnap.
“Hobi,” you say a little louder, flinching from annoyance and staining your cuticle with the polish. You curse your discontents, waiting for him to look at you but only meeting a turned neck and eyes still glued to his phone, an I’m listening portrayed by his demeanor but not really meaning it.
He chews hard on the neckline, a solid rip completely tearing several inches down his chest, eyes widening and attention finally caught when his chest is exposed hilariously.
“Hoseok!” you yell, slamming the closed bottle onto the coffee table and meeting his startled eyes, “I just bought that for you!”
He hopes to play it off and shrugs as you swipe it from his teeth, untwined fibers poking out sadly. You smooth your thumbs over the poor fabric, the third victim of his recent gnashing problem.
“Why do you keep doing this?” you ask sadly, a little more bummed about the beautiful sweatshirt than you should be.
He responds simply, “My gums itch.”
You roll your eyes at his childlike excuse, the full-sized man sitting cross-legged and distractedly in his corner of the couch with his phone paused on some game with horrendously annoying music. Was he really your alpha?
“Why don’t you do us some good and go hunting.” You offer, a lame excuse to get Hoseok out of your hair for a bit. It’s what you deserve. He rolls over with a harrumph, shoulder now bare from the growing tear in his clothing. It made you giggle slightly.
“I’m in pain and you’re laughing at me,” he deadpans, body static-still and stubborn more than ever.
Your breath fans his skin as you slither next to him, “I’m sorry, baby. Are you really hurting? Why don’t you go to the dentist?”
Hoseok pouts, taptaptapping away at his screen instead of looking at you, “I don’t want to go to the dentist. They just itch.” Even now, he licks over the burning sensation of his gums, clenching and grinding his teeth to ease the feeling in any way. You can hear the collisions of his canines, your own tingling uncomfortably from the sound.
You shake your head. “Maybe you’re teething,” you suggest in all seriousness. It wasn’t impossible; your kind’s lifespan certainly placing such life stages at seemingly unusual times. In any case, it would simply mean his canines were most likely growing longer and stronger.
He scoffs as if you’ve insulted him, “I’m well over my teething days, Y/N. They just itc—"
“Say that one more time and I’ll neuter you,” you huff. When he lacks a kinder response, you push yourself off the couch to tidy your bedroom instead. He clearly wasn’t in the mood to have a serious conversation with you at the moment, and despite its rarity, you could use your space.
Your mate was in no way irritable; in fact, Hoseok was one of the sunniest alpha’s you’ve ever encountered. His kindness differentiated him from others, bearing his mark (and one day, hopefully, his pups) certainly deeming you quite lucky. He was a soft lover above all, never making you feel as a subordinate or anything of the like.
Perhaps it’s why you two were clashing heads recently, his personality completely contradictory from his true self. Never does he ignore you, let alone snap at you.
Folding your clothes (and purposefully leaving his items in a pile on his side of the bed in spite), you exhale heavily and leave for the living room once again, disregarding your now smeared manicure.
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Hoseok beams at the shoe aisle, producing more light than whatever was already lit in the store. Due to his “issue”, stopping by the mall was a given. Two more of his shirts and even one of your necklaces mangled and chewed up like he was the Tasmanian Devil.
Petting his hair fondly, you give him a nuzzle to his cheek, “I’ll be in the next store over, puppy. Come meet me when you’re done.” He nods happily, wide-frame glasses bobbing atop his pretty nose.
You beeline for the department store in hopes of purchasing a few extra things for yourself before Hoseok sniffs you out. It’s immediate heaven when you sift through the dresses, picking a few out and dangling them happily on your fingers before bouncing from rack to rack. By the time you reach the dressing rooms, your arm aches from the pile you’ve accumulated.
“Hey there, you can go ahead and take that first stall right there,” a man directs, tall and intimidating and rather fucking handsome, you think. “My name’s Jaebum. Let me know if you need anything and I’ll go grab it for you.”
You bat your lashes and mouth a Thanks before waltzing into your room, appreciating his kindness perhaps a little too much. Despite your complex and absolute relationship status, it didn’t hurt to peek at what’s on display. It was only right!
You try on more than what you even remembered picking out, velvets and satins and the softest of cottons all hugging you warmly with every piece, a bittersweet happiness when everything seemed to fit you perfectly. The last dress, though, is your only hiccup. Material skin-tight and ending just a little above your ankles; you harrumph. Almost a perfect streak.
Dress still on (at least it zipped), you peek through the door and spot handsome Bum at the front. “Psst, um, do you mind getting me a couple more sizes in this? I think it was near the wall to the right.”
He grins and nods, almost grateful of the fact that you asked him to do so. Why was he even in this section? Should it concern you?
You watch as he leaves, back muscles showcased quite lavishly in his pristinely pressed suit.
Should it be more concerning that it didn’t?
You take a moment to look at the dress once more, smoothing over the velvet that bunched snugly at your waist and checking out your own ass. The fabric might rip if you sneeze too hard but you look pretty damn splendid.
“Found a few more and got you another color as well,” Jaebum says upon return. You almost snap your neck away from the mirror, hoping he didn’t see you ogling your bum. What a speedy fellow.
You politely open the door wider and reach for the hangers, “Thank you, I appreciate it.”
Jaebum doesn’t fully hand it to you though, briefly but noticeably skimming over your body, “I think that size is cute on you too. You have a really beautiful figure.”
Maybe it should concern you. You chuckle awkwardly and look elsewhere. Please just give me my dresses, you almost say, now self-conscious in your skin.
“It’s even better when she’s naked. I would know,” Hoseok near growls, appearing out of thin air. He swipes the hangers from behind Jaebum, who is surprised beyond all comprehension of the word, and pushes you back into the room. You’ve never seen him look so enraged, face serious and twitching as if he would shift at any given moment.
“Th-There aren’t allowed to be more than one person in a—,” Jaebum nervously starts from the other side before the door is slammed on his nose.
You didn’t even see Jaebum’s reaction, nor do you ponder it when Hoseok drops your beautiful dresses and thrusts your back against the mirror with his hand to your neck, deliberately making you yelp loud enough for others to hear. You recoil as he bares his fangs, sharp and taunting, threatening to devour you whole and you know this isn’t your Hobi.
He doesn’t get the chance for whatever else he had in store when pure vehemence engulfs you, daring to stand your ground with a low guttural snarl and shoving him off. Your strength is nothing to snicker at, his shoulders nearly hitting the other wall despite his stature.
“What’s wrong with you?” you didn’t even care if everyone in the damn store could hear you, “Don’t you dare touch me!”
Regret instantly arises in his eyes, his hands reaching out to comfort you in any way but hesitant in the warning. He would rather die than hurt you, he was sorry, he was so sorry.
Your body can feel his sorrow and want, itching to touch him in any way but you push it down. The little she-wolf in you whimpers as you struggle out of the dress and leave him alone in the stall, begging for you to go back and forgive him.
Jaebum stands, bewildered, outside of the rooms. He sure did rue the moment he ever made advances on you. Not a word is spoken as you pass by and exit the store.
It doesn’t make it any easier when Hoseok follows you closely. “Baby, I’m sorry. Please.”
“You were going to shift because of some stupid sales clerk! You could’ve gotten us in some deep shit with the order,” you scold, “We’re going home. Right now.” This was a double-edged sword, you didn’t even get to purchase anything. Though your mood is far too foul to continue.
“But I didn’t! No one saw anything. I just lost my cool for a second, I promise. I know better.” Even Hoseok strains to keep up your pace, car already in view and goddamn you walk fast.
“Do you? Are you seriously justifying your actions? You need to uphold your responsibilities, Hoseok. You’re not new to this.” He finds that he despises when you lecture him this way, gums and skin and everything prickly and he wish he could gnaw on something right about now.
It was odd to tell him these things, taking into consideration that his role is considerably higher than yours and that he hardly ever faults as an alpha. If there wasn’t something going on biologically, what else could it be?
He’s obviously straining to keep his composure now, jaw slacked and knuckles cracking in his fist, “How am I supposed to do that now? It won’t happen again. It’s over.”
“Then what about your shitty mood swings? We don’t argue, Hoseok. You’re not mean, you’re not easily agitated, and you’re not a fucking paper  shredder. Neither are you aggressive to your own mate,” you throw in his face, unsurprised when he cowers again at the thought. It’s like the man was on his period.
Now that you recall, the last time you’ve ever seen him so angry at you is when you watched Endgame without him, and that should say enough. This was just all so new and unbecoming of someone with his level of reputation.
“You know I didn’t mean to do that. I never want to hurt you…” he leads as you beat him to the driver’s side of the car, watching him over the hood for him to finish his sentence, “I’m just—”
“You what, Hoseok?”
He jostles the door handle a few times, a rep of unsettling clacks making him uneasy.  
“Can you unlock the car?”
“You what?” you say a little louder, entirely avoiding his question.
“Goddammit,” he hisses, “Just let me in and we can talk about it when we get home.” You scan his face in search of anything. For the truth. For him to own up to what it is. What you get is nothing.
So you smile, “No.”
He stands cluelessly as you unlock your door and hop in, starting the car with a satisfying roll and opening his window just enough to see his addled facial expression.
“What are you doing?” he deadpans.
“If you won’t admit it then you obviously don’t take me seriously, and if you won’t take me seriously then I’ll take my car home by myself. So, toodles!”
He smirks nervously, slender fingers sifting through his hair, “Y/N, c’mon. Just let me in.” He’s even more staggered when you start reversing out of your spot. Eyes widening hilariously, he cusses under his breath as he walks cautiously towards the door.
“Have a fun run, baby. Better get home soon,” you feign pity, “looks like it’s going to start raining pretty soon.”
“We live an hour away!”
You drive down the row, turning on your signal just in case someone needed to know. Shucks, you were such a good driver, even in the parking lot.
Hoseok thinks otherwise, anger and panic so vivid that you can feel it from this distance. Walking Time Bomb even begins to jog, not willing to risk your bluff.
“Okay! Okay, I admit it. I may be going through something…” his wavering voice trickles into your head. “You’re right.’
You let him catch up to you, eyes shifty and fingers fiddling. “Hi, darling. Can you say that one more time? In person?” His chest puffs.
“I already said it once,” he begs.
Was his pride this important? Did the strangled mutt deep down change your Hoseok for the worst? An impatient car behind you honks and you shrug.
“You’re making people wait. I’m going to leave.”
“Jesus fucking—okay. I think I’m teething. Or something involving my dental state. It’s making me fucking grumpy and it’s painful and I want to punch a fucking wall because it’s stupid that this phase is so late.” You unlock his door mid-sentence, his body falling into his seat before he continues to blabber on.
“Oh, little puppy,” you slide your sunglasses from atop your head down to the bridge of your nose, “Don’t be so sensitive. ‘S like a human adult getting braces.”
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The week passes by agonizingly slow. And that wasn't necessarily because Hoseok bitched and complained, throwing temper tantrums when the remote had fallen between the couch cushions or throwing his pants stormily when they would catch on his ankles and make him hobble about like a disabled chicken.
Or maybe it was because of that.
You dare to creak the door to his den (pun intended), having locked himself in such confinement to work through the paperwork that's been piling on his mahogany desk for days. He looks worn around the eyes, long brown hair pushed back with his fake reading glasses. You knock three times as if he couldn't already sense your presence. When he looks at you through his lashes, he nods for you to proceed.
"Hi, baby. How's the work going?" you ask with a honey-dipped edge.
He shrugs, "A lot of affairs from other packs that I have to go over. I should be done soon."
You slink behind his office chair and wrap your arms around his shoulders, "Mm, why don't you take a break and have a nice little bath with me?" He doesn't budge one inch, straightening out a stack of papers before stapling them neatly and tucking them into one of his drawers.
"I need to finish this. I've been pushing it back until the last minute."
Rolling him out a bit, you slide onto his lap and rest on his chest. Your touch always lulls a serene sensitivity from his skin, a natural effect that only you are capable of. But his muscles remain taut. Bones stiff and budging none whatsoever. Stuttering, you try again, "You've been working for hours. I'm lonely. Just an hour--,"
"Y/N. I'm warning you. Get off."
She-wolf unconsciously warns you to stand down upon this statement. Was he being serious? He's warning you? You search his blank face, waiting for him to crack a smile or lift you up and attack you with kisses. When he doesn't, you test the waters.
Your nails scratch the bare skin under his shirt, "H-Hoseokie, we haven't had sex in so long," you whine. Invading his space, however, only sets him off more.
He growls, deep and meant to be menacing. It takes brutal force to push yourself to move, a weight halting your ministrations. His word, no matter how rare it be, was your law. Do you dare defy that?
You unbutton his pants the same time he threatens, "Continue any further and see what happens." He's breathier than normal and that gives you some satisfaction. He was your mate, after all. Eternal fulfillment was your duty.
The feeling of his heavy and growing bulge, nestling in the crook of his thigh, is a success all in its own. You purr and rub your legs together, licking at Hoseok's neck lovingly and waiting for him to give in. "Hobi, you're already--ah!"
Your view spins as Hoseok scruffs you to his desk, cold wood pressed to your cheek and wrists somehow pinned behind you. Yiping in fear, you struggle in his harsh imprisonment.
"You don't fucking listen," he complains, voice balancing on the line between speaking and yelling.
"Hoseok! L-Let me g-go--," you start before he grinds himself into your ass, boner prominent and angry as it prods. He replaces the hand to your neck with his mouth, laving and suckling all the way down your shoulder.
"Can't do that. I warned you and you disobeyed me. You disobey your alpha, Y/N?"
"No, I'm sorry--," you squeak before your dress is thrown over your back and a sharp slap comes down onto your ass.
You don’t believe the sound that comes out of your throat, pressing your thighs together and wiggling the pain away. “J-Jung Hoseok! What is—” Another slap, harder than the first.
The nerves tingle all the way down to your toes as your eyes roll back. You moan once more, unsolicited and without restraint. Hoseok is content with your reaction, not expecting you to squirm so nicely because of your punishment.
"You like this, don't you? I can smell you leaking like some submissive whore," he snarls with an edge of disappointment. You're beyond mortified of how he speaks to you, although not inclined to deny his words. Not when he spanks you once more, with such force that a scream is rewarded and your back arches in euphoric pain.
"Hoseok, no more, please. I'll--I'll cum if you keep, ugh," you blabber over yourself. He thinks you look prettily pathetic drooling on his desk, so close to spilling over the edge from being physically humiliated.
"Tch, so weak," he comments before releasing your wrist and letting you collapse to the floor. "Are you done?" The question both turns you on and pisses you off, emotions swirling into something self-destructive.
Crawling on the carpet and up his leg, you nuzzle into his bulge, "But I still didn't get what I want." You don’t even ponder where this behavior is coming from; slinking out of you like a dog with its tail between its legs. Perhaps his own change of manner influenced one in you.
He could laugh at how easy you were being, wondering when he ever mated with someone who acts like such a sexually-obsessed brat. "Oh?" he prompts, "So you think you get to make the calls here?"
Licking the hem of his boxers in response, he doesn't feel pleased with your lack of words. You perk up when he shuffles his cock out from the confines of his layers. It’s almost instinctual, not wasting any time to pepper kisses and kitten licks to his tip. God, he even smells amazing. You don't care if you look ridiculous, feverish with your actions like he'd take away your precious treat if you weren't cautious.
He snickers at you, petting your hair with an unexpectedly soft touch. Your heart-shaped irises peer up, knowing he loves your eye contact when you suck him off. Watching the blush spread on his face means that you must be doing your job correctly. Besides, not even the Big Bad Wolf can deny when he feels his pleasure.
He almost can’t stand the self-righteousness that oozes off you. If you thought you were in control, you were dead-wrong. "You want my cock that bad, huh, baby?" your love bunches as much of your hair as he can with his fist, "Then fucking take it."
Then his girthy dick shoves to the back of your throat without warning, hips to your nose and thrustingthrustingthrusting as far as he can.
You'd sputter if your mouth wasn't so full, eyes overflowing with tears and throat constricting in hopes that he'll let you go. When he doesn't and continues to grind himself down your mouth, you dig your nails into his thighs and whine on his persistent cock. It doesn’t matter, the digging crescents in his thighs rousing him even further and even hoping those pretty nails of yours leave marks for him. He’d accept no less.
Hoseok thrusts twice more before pulling you off and watching you cough maniacally. The tears that gathered were now running down your face, accompanied with your saliva that leaks from your chin and onto the floor.
You couldn't breathe, you couldn't ask him to stop, and you loved it.
He cocks a brow as you struggle to catch up, "We'll stop here. You're obviously not made for this."
Pitiful is the only word he can use to describe how quickly you paw and beg for him, desperately wrapping your fingers around the base of his member and pumping him just the way he likes it, "No! I can take it, please use me." Your unstable hand massages the cum-saliva mix as well as it can, a small victory celebrated when he bucks into you.
"Mm," his thumb wipes a stray tear from your lip, "You're so beautiful when you cry. Will you sit on the desk for me?"
You don't hesitate to obey, being careful to hop up when your bum is so sore but otherwise eager for him to touch you again. When he places himself between your legs, your body hums.
"I'm... I'm not well, Y/N. I don't want to hurt you," he says, voicing his first concern after what's already happened. With his brows knit in concern and his slender fingers rubbing calmly at your sides, it's almost as if the Hoseok you know has returned. The Hobi that makes your pancakes just a little overcooked like you prefer. Who makes you a blanket nest when you’re feeling down. And will gladly give up his last bite of anything to watch you munch happily even after you’ve finished your own portion.
In some way, this was your same Hobi. Maybe not so sweet and innocent but more on the receiving end. Spending his days tending to you out of pure love and pleasure to see you bloom; it was just your turn to return the favor.
So you kiss him with fervor and mold your chest to his, feeling the scorching heat that emanates from him. He must seriously be straining himself, you think. His canines graze your lips and you know he's trying his best to hold back; to not completely obliterate you.
"I want to help you," you whisper against his mouth. You implore him and he doesn’t hesitate to take your offer.
You extend your legs as he rushes to pull down your thong, throwing it to the side, and embracing you with another kiss, all tongue and pants. Some of his documents get ruffled under your steadying hands and he shoves them off altogether, a rain of really important paper littering the room. He comes in a little too excitedly, slamming a drawer closed with his thigh and even scooting his desk across the floor.
“God fucking dammit,” he swears, your chuckles covering his wet lips. “I’m… a mess… not thinking straight. Need to cum inside you.”
You purr when his head rubs against your sex, an electric sensation tearing through you. “Want you to knot me,” you whisper. A mistake in its own because he’s practically moaning into your mouth when you say such things.
“Yeah, baby? Want your cunt pumped full? Hm?” he asks into your jaw, all the while spreading your legs as far as they can split with his strong hands. His hips begin to circle like he’s stalling as long as possible and that rouses you up in a way.
You nod with sultry eyes and chant, “Yes. Yes, yes.” By the second yes does he all but slam into you, your final confirmation his endgame.
Hoseok was truly blessed in size, something no mere human could ever match. His length alone would make you double over in ecstasy if he allowed you the space to. Squeezing around him only makes him fuck you deeper, both wanting and needing more of each other than you already have. You were made for him, and him you.
You whimper as he pulls out, his head tantalizing your g-spot before ramming back inside and forcing an angelic cry. “H-Hoseokie… Please, your pups. I want to have your pups”
The sounds of his hips against your skin with your moans and the subtle creak of his desk is almost humorous, you were fucking like dogs. Even more so when he pushes you flat against the wood by the front of your throat, his thumb tucked gently on an airway as your tongue flops out in simple bliss.
“Don’t say that if you don’t mean it,” he snarls with a particularly evil drill to your core that curls your toes. “Nothing to me would be more satisfying than to breed you.”
Your throat constricts and you cough, your tiny hands tugging at his fingers while barely being able to pry his grip. You can’t resist moaning through clenched teeth still, even when the prettiest wine red pours into his irises. Hoseok holds back incredibly well, despite having shifting eyes, his total control never fails to astonish you. It was years worth of training and you thank the stars that it was useful in a time where you were literally stuffed with his cock.
“And you’re so willing; so obedient now. You like when I fuck you like this. Just want that beautiful pussy bred until you’re spilling, right?” he chuckles with means to humiliate when your eyes flutter and drool spills from your swollen lips, “What a mate.”
You tighten, an embarrassing amount of arousal spilling and sticking to your love. He doesn’t mind one bit, rather, losing composure for a brief moment, “Ugh, so good.”
His hand suddenly withdraws from your tender neck and you sputter an attempt to catch your breath, a fleeting moment before he wraps his arms under your knees and prompts you to hang onto him when he stands. How quickly he’s able to switch positions is hot in itself, but the thought is also lost when you sink down even further on his dick.
“Oh, oh my god,” you wail pathetically, wrapping yourself around him and trying to lift your trembling body to ease how full you feel, even for just a moment.
“Hm? I thought you wanted this, baby. Wanted my complete, unforgiving love for you. Isn’t that why you walked into my office?” he smirks similarly to how you imagine the devil would. His hands find leverage against the closest wall, also shoving you against it and resuming his pace into you.
This, to whichever persona was hiding deep down in Hoseok, was divine. Incredible. You would die for this man even without the bond. He was literally screwing you braindead.
He pants, warm and sweaty and shirt somehow unbuttoned halfway down (when did you do that?), “I thought you wanted my knot? Not anymore?”
Your pupils blow out as you shake your head, you were so close.
“Ah, then I’ll knot you. I’ll knot you but you have to beg,” he says with a wink. Bastard.
“Please, please knot me, baby. Breed me and let me have your pups,” you sob, “Fill me up until I can’t take it anymore, Alpha, please—”
He jabs incessantly until you’re entirely maxed out, sloppy smacks echoing out further than the den and his growls emanating when you drag your sharp nails down his back, the fabric tearing under your fingers. Hoseok grinds his full length into you, reaching beyond the end of your walls.
“S-Stay,” he orders. He slows as the base of his cock swells and even though you asked for it, it’s always a little uncomfortable. You can’t even fathom how it feels for your mate, his sudden groans and the absolute necessity to lave at your neck only scraping at the surface of any real indication.
Hoseok told you once that it was similar to both being overstimulated and having a sudden spike of energy, which could explain his touchiness. It was cute though, and kinda hot.
Nestled deep inside, you can subtly feel the ropes of semen beginning to pool. You rest your head over his shoulder, buzzing from the intensity of it all and watching as the walls move and shift into the ones of your bedroom.
Hoseok’s hoarse voice surprises you, “Fuck, I’m so dizzy.”
The bed is a heavenly difference from the den’s desk and wall, your heart pounding a little too hardly when he places one of his pillows lengthwise under your back for extra squish. He was so cute.
But then he collapses on you.
“Oof—I’ve never seen you like that before. My ass hurts,” you state dreamily.
“Oh, love. Are you okay? Did I hurt you?” he asks seriously, lifting his head to study your face in case you lie. The red dissipated long before, his deep brown eyes twinkling down at you like they always do.
“You were a little rough,” you feign, pouting and pushing around his face with paw-folded fists. He thinks you look like an idiot, a cute idiot.
“I’m sorryyyy,” he whines, burying his face into your chest and wiggling around like a fish. His knot moves with him and you wince.
“Hoseok, stay still.”
Being showered in a sudden attack of kisses is what he responds with, not even aware of the task at hand and fake crying, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I don’t ever want to hurt you—I—oh no.”
You yipe as semen sloshes down your leg, shoving your palm into Hobi’s (who is undoubtedly back to his usual self) cheek and trying your best to not panic.
“Goddammit, Jung Hoseok! Stay still!”
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beep boop hope you liked, leave some feedback if you did!
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dr3am-t3am · 4 years ago
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quick comment i wanted to make on the fan art issue, that i would’ve put on twitter if it weren't for its stupid character limit
i really really do understand both sides. in all honesty, im not mad at all, bc i think the issue is more with twitter itself than either dream or the artists, but tensions got rlly high last night and i feel for everyone that was affected. i do wanna say tho, the twitter algorithm really puts artists at a h u g e disadvantage. 
to everyone and anyone affected, pls feel free to talk to me? and if you have fan art, feel free to message me w/ it. im v far from anything resembling a big account both here and on twitter, but i will definitely boost ur art if u send it ! we really can't expect ccs to see or boost our art, just from the crappiness of social media algorithms alone, but when artists work together to help each other and such we can still make sure that all of our art is appreciated and loved by the community. love y'all !! <3 <3 <3
more hypothetical discussion and thoughts under the cut
again, i am a fanartist. i am also a fanfic writer, and i started on tumblr, so i know that bc of my experiences, im gonna be a lot less? affected? i guess by limited interactions from ccs. on tumblr, there’s no way you're gonna get noticed by ccs (which is a perk, sometimes) and when you’re a fanfic writer you really dont even ask for positive attention you really just want people to stop giving you negative attention haha
that being said, i understand people’s frustration with dream bc he hasn’t been interacting as much with art. i maintain that this frustration should be more directed to the twitter algorithm, tho. 
(who’s ready for some hypothetical math?)
let’s say that an artist takes 1 hour to make one piece of art. this is honestly, really really dang fast, many detailed full pieces of art take 2-3 hours at least, and many others will take 8, 10, or even more. but we’re gonna give the artist the benefit of the doubt anyways and say that they take 1 hour. 
Now how about stan accounts? Let’s say that they make 5 posts an hour. This is honestly, probably a low ball! Each post takes a few seconds to make, a lot of the time, and plenty of accounts are much more active than posting every 12 minutes. But we’re gonna, again, make this situation the best possible situation for the artist, and let’s say that the stan account only posts 5 times an hour. Even with this situation, for each post that the artist makes, assuming that they @ dream every time, he’s going to see 5 posts by a stan account.
Artists also tend to be very outnumbered on twitter, so let’s say for every artist, there are 10 stan accounts. Let’s assume that they also make 5 posts an hour. So for each artist that shows up in dream’s notifications, he’s going to see 50 posts by stan accounts.
But artists get fatigued! We’re going to go with a high estimate again with 4 fully finished pieces a day. (this is insane! keep in mind, even if we’re lowballing the time put in, this is still 4 hours a day of art. for most artists, their fully finished pieces take 2, 3, 4 hours. four pieces a day would put them at 8-16 hours of work!!). on the other hand, stan account posts take a lot less time to make, and are much less likely to make them fatigued. Therefore, we can assume that the stan accounts, posting 5 times an hour, can stay active for 8 hours a day. 
What does this put us at? For every post that an artist makes with a fully finished piece of art, dream is seeing 100 notifications from stan accounts. This doesn’t even include how dream is more likely to respond to those who interact with his tweets, which is nigh impossible for artists because they cannot make a piece of art to reply to his posts in the ~5 minutes that he will look at the replies to the post he posts. I also made this situation the best possible situation for the artist. In reality, I can only make about one fully finished piece a day, and more often will go two or three days without posting. There are also far more stan accounts than artists, stan accounts are often active for longer than 8 hours and post more than once every 12 minutes. The real ratio might be more like 1 in 200, 300, 400. Just because of the algorithm, artists are pretty dang screwed.
Dream has been making efforts to help with this, such as through the dreamfanart tag! this manages to filter out all of the stan accounts, and when fan artists use it he’s going to be much more likely to see the art. even so, the amount of artists he will actually interact with is very low. it’s just the way the website works, when his notifications are definitely constantly flooded, when artists are so easily drowned out by the literal army of stan accounts on twitter. in the end, it’s really up to artists to hype each other up and support each other. My best advice for if you want more appreciation and interaction are:
1. use the dreamfanart tag! again, this manages to filter out most of the stan account activity, and will help other people to find your art if you’re a relatively new artist
2. self advertise! retweet your own art, reply with your art under people’s posts hyping up artists, dont be afraid to put yourself out there. if you want your voice to be heard in the sound of all these other accounts, you have to be loud!
3. interact with other artists! by helping and hyping up other artists, theyre more likely to do so with you. artists are a pretty small population of dttwt, and we have to support each other to get anywhere. retweet, like, reply to people’s art. follow dttwt artists and support them! 
4. love your art for what you’ve already done. this is the hardest part, especially when you put hours into a piece and see it get like, less than 10 likes. i have been there, and it sucks. but your art is Good. you put your time, effort, and heart into that, and regardless of how other people respond, you did good and im proud of you. <3
a last note: i have to admit, i wasn't the most comfortable with all of the dttwt artists bullying and venting their frustrations at dream, specifically, for “ignoring” fan artists. could he have interacted more? definitely. but i dont think he was by any means trying to “ignore” fan artists. his notifications are swamped, his tl is swamped. twitter works in a way where a day or two after you make a piece of art, it’s pretty much buried and lost forever. last night he was just trying to do a good thing by shouting out some small accounts in the community. fan artists, i am a part of you, and i feel your pain and frustration, but please don’t speak out of a place of anger. it’s far too easy to say something, publicly, that you’ll regret. i do not condone any of the hate sent anywhere, especially to fan artists last night, but let’s all remember to be kind and build each other up, ok? We’re all in this together, ccs, stan accounts, fan artists. we’re all doing this because we love the dteam and the content they make. don’t lose sight of why we’re here in the first place <3 
again, love you guys so much. take care of yourselves! im proud of all of you, fan artists, fanfic writers, any and all creators, as well as those of you who are just here to express your love for the dteam. be kind and support one another, ok? <3 
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joneswuzhere · 5 years ago
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in anticipation of episode 4.14, i watched ‘how to get away with murder’ s1
here’s my thoughts on how rd might be playing out an homage to the show, and on what these parallels might suggest to expect from the whole ‘jughead dies’ plot
below are complete spoilers for ‘how to get away with murder’ s1, a few spoilers for s2 and s3. and also. spoilers for donna tartt’s ‘the secret history.’ cool ok here we go
- first. we’re abbreviating the title to htg
- second. htg’s plot is pretty convoluted and out-of-order, so it’s hard to mention one thing without having to explain four other things. riverdale’s format is so chill in comparison. i apologize for repetition and confusing timeline discussion
- also, maybe u watched this show! or maybe u want to. or maybe ur impatient and just here for riverdale lol. i’m not going to make u scroll through a whole plot summary of htg’s first season. BUT i did write one up here if that’s something u want to read. it will probably make the following easier to understand, but i’ll do my best to make it accessible without that
- third. like i said, my goal here is finding potential parallels and, based on that, speculating on what rd is doing with this plot. i have no conclusions but i do have some thoughts and maybe you do too
- ok the basics of htg:
- this show is the visual inspiration for rd’s flash forward hook, as well as for the murder cover up in the woods.
- the show structure is: a main timeline, intercut occasionally with flash forwards to a murder that happens at the midseason point. similar to rd
- a difference: in rd, the flashes jump to different points over a period of days - burning their clothes, the search party, body identification, then the arrests, the line up, and then back to the ‘death’ scene. in htg, all the flashes jump to different points during one particular night, and only deal with the groups effort to dispose of the body and evidence.
- where was i. oh, but there’s 2 murders in htg. murder #1 happened before the series start point. in the main timeline, the investigation into murder #1 builds up to the midseason climax that results in murder #2 (the one the group is covering up).
- after the timeline has caught up to the midseason murder, then the flash forwards are replaced with flash backs that begin to reveal past details about murder #1.
- so right away, what stands out to me is the possibility that, once the main timeline catches up to whatever happens to jughead in the woods, rd will continue to follow this format. but what would rd flash back to? hang on,
- the genre here is inverted detective story, where instead of finding out someone was killed and following along to find out who did it,, you learn right away who’s doing the murdering and how. the mystery lies in whether they’ll get away with it and/or what led up to that point.
- in htg, murder #1 is a regular mystery, and murder #2 is inverted. in rd, jughead’s death is an inverted mystery, and there’s several other regular mysteries/deaths: chipping’s suspicious suicide, the old generation of the quill & skull society, + the missing kids that jughead and betty are investigating
- so it may transpire that we see flashbacks to those missing students, like moose or the stonewall 5. or maybe context on why chipping jumped, what dupont said to him. or a glimpse into fpj1′s time at stonewall. i’m spitballing
- hm a note on genre here: maybe there’s a conversation to be had about inverted murder mysteries and perfect murders (recall, the theme dupont assigned for the class). like, crime fiction specifically told through the perspective of getting away with it. (a perfect murder is specifically a murder that resists all explanation. no suspects, no evidence)
- ok. the first half of htg s1 is the lead up to the night of murder #2. the second half of the season focuses on how participating in and covering up a murder is affecting the people involved. grief, guilt, anxiety, nightmares. strain and changes in their relationships with each other, friends, and family. again, perhaps we’ll see rd focus on this in a similar way.
- hey btw, does that sound a little familiar to u? it might if you read the secret history. we already know this book is one of the influences behind rd’s s4 plot, but i was surprised at how much overlap is apparent between htg’s plot and the book plot. i made a chart about it lmao. more on that later
- what else fits into a parallel between rd and htg?
- some similarities between characters. htg has a group of law students from privileged backgrounds who are super competitive with each other, similar to the stonewall kids. and there’s the one outsider student who gets into the class last minute, is far less privileged, and who has a tragic past and a head for snooping and investigation.
- there’s a student/teacher affair that gets violent. it goes down pretty much the opposite of in rd; the girl gets pregnant, is totally in love, suggests the affair should be revealed to the teacher’s wife, and then she goes missing and turns up dead (murder #1)
- also, unlike rd where we have only donna’s word, in htg the affair is confirmed, and revealed through a bunch of evidence - dick pics on phones and postmortem pregnancy results, etc
- some other minor details from the show that the rd writers may have reflected upon:
- a window jumper suicide. circumstances very not the same tho
- a blink-and-miss-it scene with a dog named mr. chips, which is the nickname of the film character who rd’s mr. chipping is probably named after (goodbye mr. chips)
- also, ok. the 2 murders story is the show’s long A plot, but each episode also has a short B plot in the form of court cases that annalise and her group of student/interns work on. (btw lead character annalise is a criminal defense lawyer & law professor). details worth mentioning from some of these subplots:
- there’s a case involving cult brainwashing. a former devotee is charged with something terroristic with a bomb she did years ago, idk. annalise has her visit her old cult leader in prison to ask him to help her by testifying that he forced her to participate. this backfires - she falls back under his sway, he escapes custody during the trial, and they run away together, abandoning the family she made after leaving the cult
- in this ep the patty hearst trial is mentioned - the difficulty of trying to legally prove someone acted under duress, or prove they were brainwashed. and how trying to claim both at the same time is a terrible legal defense
- in another case, a woman is charged with murdering her housemaid while sleepwalking. she resists help from annalise bc she feels so guilty. the woman says ‘can u imagine waking up to realize that you killed somebody you loved? that’s what i did.’ except she didn’t; they figure out she was being framed by the real killer, her husband, who was jealous bc he thought he was the only one sleeping with the maid but he found out his teen son was too. yikes
- there is so much cheating in this show smh. anyway,
- these subplots are interesting to compare to rd, but sort of trivial in terms of htg’s overall plot. so what happens in the A plot after murder #2?
- a catch-up if u skipped the plot summary: annalise keating, lawyer, professor, is the central character. she’s direct, takes no shit, and puts up an emotionally impervious wall that keeps almost everyone out. but it’s also apparent from ep1 that she’s really suffering - her marriage is falling apart, she’s cheating and finds out her husband, sam, is too. they agree to repair things and sam seems to be making a big effort, but she keeps catching him in lies that point toward murder #1.
- in the latter half of the season, while she’s helping make sure the kids get away with murder #2 (they accidentally kill sam while pursuing him as the murder suspect), annalise’s grieving process is a focus. there’s an emphasis on her appearance as her armor, guarding her complicated grief over the trauma of her loss and the destruction of her trust. her cold exterior is both a protection and, at the same time, a point of suspicion for police, lawyers, and public who wonder how she can be so unaffected. meanwhile, in private, she has a total breakdown.
- this builds from a parallel that’s played with throughout the season - annalise’s control of her image vs hiding or confronting the truth. like, at one point, it’s evening, she wipes off all her makeup and pulls off her wig, then turns barefaced to her husband and asks him bluntly for the truth, why she caught him in a huge lie. and the flip side, later walking around with her whole look in place, as if nothing is wrong, is part of her effort to cover up the murder.
- i bring this up bc it reminds me of something that (the brilliant, the illuminating) @bettycooperoutfitwatch​ talked about in her 4.05 post, regarding That Sweater.
- in this post, at the flash forward arrest scene, she points out ‘it’s betty cooper in disguise as betty cooper.’ which, like. i’m floored by this observation
- the persona betty originally created to conform to her parents’ unattainable expectations of perfection and normality, now (not for the first time) dialed up and re-purposed to try to disperse suspicion???? love this
- annalise and betty are very Not alike as characters. but it seems that betty, like annalise, will be involved in the murder of her loved one. i’m interested to see if rd will follow htg’s emphasis on emotional turmoil and pretense in the aftermath of trying to get away with something horrible
- oh but that reminds me, i promised a chart
- i haven’t read the secret history and i have no desire to, but i foraged enough details to be able to point out some bare bones similarities going on here. it’s important to include this bc, at the moment, it complicates any attempt to figure out which, if either, inverted murder plot rd might be paralleling at any time.
- in other words, all my speculations here about htg parallels might be worthless bc i might be looking at the wrong text. it’s cool, i think that makes it more fun
- book spoilers in here. sorry it’s small, u can try to zoom in here
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- please feel free to jump in with corrections or more details if you’ve read the book
- [update as of 2/25: i’m reading the fuckin book after all, so i may make another post with an updated chart at some point. maybe]
- last thing. in htg, the inverted mystery (whether or not the kids get away with it) is resolved by annalise planting evidence that frames someone else (whom she chooses bc she’s confident she can get him safely out of the charges). the bottom line there is: someone innocent is framed for murder #2.
- and then a new development - one kid involved in murder #2 freaks out and may decide to turn the others in - leads to a 3rd death. hm (post s4 update: that’s jonathan i guess)
- actually no, the real last thing. wikipedia says there’s a subplot in htg s2 that involves blackmailing annalise and others with uhhhh creepy surveillance videos of them, some that incriminate them in murder #2.
- and then, in s3, drawn out over another series of flash forwards, there’s a character death reveal... of the guy who’s most in parallel to jughead.... lmao. and speak nothing of s6. so like, there’s definitely potential for more or continuing parallels here
- i kind of hope not though, bc i don’t have it in me to watch more of this show. it’s Very high strung, i can’t deal with it (post s4 update: no i never watched any more of this show but yes, that was all definitely used by rd)
- bonus: wait do u want some of my opinions on the actual show?? favorite characters: annalise, bonnie, and oliver. i liked the fast pace but the constant tension stressed me out. also, not enough lesbians; i kept expecting bonnie and annalise to kiss. the guy who plays wes.... not a very good actor, is he? viola davis though: amazing. that’s all. watch if u like stress. sorry i spoiled everything
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gg-astrology · 5 years ago
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heyy! one of my friends is a cap sun/merc/venus/mars + a virgo moon and talking to him can get so EXHAUSTING and it's not just me saying this, a lot of other people i know say the same thing but i'm looking through the astrology point of view and i wanted to hear your thoughts on it. also is it true that virgo moons can be emotionally detached/have trouble expressing their emotions or does that depend on their other placements?
hey there! 💙🖤❤️ i totally get what you mean, I know someone like that too.. but I have to say this, once again, (as a precaution) try not form opinions of the sign/placements based on bad experiences. Just moving forward, in order to learn techniques and stuff properly. This is just a precaution to keep in mind?
About and For the Virgo Moon Person ⬇️
🚫long post 🚫
So…how do i say this.. virgo moons… they think alot because they want to help? that’s their mode of caring? 
In a way, being useful/thinking logically is how they provide help for others. Even if people don’t like them, virgo moon’s detachment stems more bc they care about others than an actual detachment/isolation itself (i.e. see aquarius  detachment as well, but of a different kind than virgo).
I think it’s that kind of thing y know - like, detaching ur emotions so u can still offer objectives first. But in a way they also like to over-analyze and over-think a lot of stuff. Especially emotions and how to deal with it/process it moving forward. I think that’s why a part of the archetype is those of a giver and ultimately self-sacrificial, because they will put other priorities before themselves - whether it’s people, objectives, or getting their views across to help the situation. 
Even if they bury or suppress their own sensitivity and emotions a lot of the time in order to do that (provide help/offer assistance/support). It’s a good idea to keep in mind that they are burying it underneath. 
Let’s look at it from their perspective for a second - you’ve probably already realized this (or if not, it’s never a bad thing to look at it again and maybe realize how empathetic they can be) - they process emotions themselves very logically, so when others come to them for help - they tend to give advice/reflect that back in the same manner, without getting too attached to the emotional side of things (being capable vs being too emotional). 
However, they ARE sensitive to the environment - to people around them + what is sourced. If they can’t identify the problem/isn’t sensitive to that - then they wouldn’t be able to offer any advice regarding it. It’s good to keep in mind, that the moon receives energy from others. So when their advice is criticized, thrown away, hurled back or hurled at them. They may hide behind a mask of indifference (bc, again, logic and understanding rationally that not everyone can like you) – but it does still hurt. 
That kind of creates a loop contributing to how they suppress or have difficulties occasionally with expressing themselves, or letting themselves talk about stuff freely. Because as much as they want to help - sometimes they think they’re not translating well, or is not helpful to others, the idea of what they’re giving being the opposite of helpful - wasteful or a burden - sometimes repels them too (more like, ‘if it repels them personally it would repel others as well’. That’s how they’d think about it.) 
So. You can imagine what that would be like if you’re stuck in a loop of trying to be the Best Version of Yourself Possible (that you think is needed/that you’re proud of or accepted yourself as) but not being actually accepted by others - it’s kind of a hard life to have?? Virgo/Pisces have this thing where being accepted is nice, is what makes it - ultimately fulfilling. They have a role in the universe and a function - and sometimes it’s just hitting and hitting a metal bar until something fits - whether its a place, person, environment, life. That’s when it’s truly ok to feel accepted. 
I guess the best way to say this is that Virgos can think sometimes that emotions get in the way - which can be true - of fixing things. And that’s how they function? 
I can totally understand your frustration - especially if the person has a lot of Capricorn as well (wanting to be right, prideful, wanting to be Good and the Best even if they can be low-key about it!) - but, again, this is just very earthian. And ultimately - if you’re asking for my perspective, they deserve some empathy. They’re not? really doing harm to anyone. And sometimes it’s just that. 
I don’t blame the person altogether, I think it’s an everyone’s problem where no one’s developed or doing well enough to accept each other which is a? thing that happens sometimes in groups and maturity (the idea of developing). A boat is being balanced, someone needs more help than others because they’re rocking it with their own personal problems - but it takes a team to actually keep it together and not throw them overboard. 
You don’t have to be friends with those you know you can’t handle right now, I’m just saying 1. look out for yourself, your own boundaries and mental well-being 2. hopefully this will help with empathizing with the person in question a little bit more. At least keeping in mind that they have their own perspective and emotional stuff too. and 3. If things don’t work out right now - don’t worry about it. Time is a long long journey, and people can grow and change - doesn’t mean you have to be there or be obligated to that.
Anyways, as an ending note I just wanted to say I do think Earth moons all kind of have similar problems with opening up - but emotional detachment doesn’t mean they don’t have emotions inside. It’s good to keep that in mind! 
If you need any advice on how to help this Virgo Moon person - usually offering detailed and logical advice right back analyzing the topic (whatever it is, like, hey lets talk about boundaries, or hey lets talk about how we both want to be treated?) tends to help. I think they’d appreciate it, just as long as it remains neutral and not a personal attack/direct criticism. They’re still a mutable earth sign, so they CAN get slippery if the tone isn’t right skkskskskkd but - otherwise, I think just spelling it out to them on how to DO stuff that you (and others) are comfortable with is nice. 
The problem with this combination is that they don’t KNOW if nobody teaches them. They don’t know what people expect, what other people require, they’re trying to do their best figuring it out themselves and trying to provide from their own perspective. Feedback really helps, but done so in a way that’s like proposing a new concept to discuss/discover together. Rather than a criticism of how shitty they made someone feel.
I hope this helps?? 💙🖤❤️ Again, if you’re interested in learning about this astrologically - try not to have prejudice by learning archetypes of these signs. It tends to help, alongside the placements. 
I think most of the time we’re trying to line up our experience with what we’ve learnt, simultaneously at the same time. But sometimes we miscalculate and turn into our experiences over-blinding what we should learn. I recommend reading up on what the planet does as well - if you’re looking into further details about the topic! As it tends to help.
Right.. so. Hm! I can’t take all the credit for this myself, since I did have a long discussion with my friend who’s an Aquarius/Virgo. I think they’re very empathetic, and it helped me a lot with how I wanted to form this answer. So I’m gonna add in some excerpt incase it helps:
Aquarius/Virgo friend: 
“i process emotions w a logical approach and when ppl for some come to me for help I’m v much able to help them and give them advice without getting emotionally attached at all? this sounds bad bc it sounds like im not emotionally supporting the person truly nhhhdh yeah it can be useful for advice and knowing how to go on from a bad situation nd move on but it’s not always ideal since. duh. feelings r made to… be felt.. properly” 
“but emotionally detached like FR…. idk man…. i think we care a lot abt people, we always want to help nd we’re not ok if they’re not. virgos r actually v sensitive to their environment and how others r feeling as well”
“and true i do feel like all earth signs have issues w expressing emotions. they’re grounded nd they know themselves… so they all think they’re self sufficient. or want to be or whatever. but ofc it’s not true y'all do need somEone sometimes. but its hard bc everyone relies on earth signs i think… so yeah”
“take good care of Virgos. we’re sensitive. we need love. we want people to like and need us. we’ve been through more than u know. yes i will process that you don’t like me logically but i do care deep down, I’ll just bury it so I don’t stop being logical. bye”
“also as u know we’re really good over analyzers nd over thinkers nd w that being said pls reply u were typing but didnt send did i say something wrong i hope i didnt but i idk idk what I’m talking about but  am i dumb??? reply plsssksskkjsjd where are u…   but then we never send these despite thinking them bc it’s an earth sign supposed 2 be cool for everyone nd grounded all the time”
   So! 💙🖤❤️ They’re kind of worriers! 💙🖤❤️ But they’re pretty harmless and nice once they learn how to relax and be chill a little bit more. I guess I’m saying sometimes you just gotta sit a cap/virgo down and be like my dude… mayhaps not?? and be done with it!! 💙🖤❤️ I hope this helps! 💙🖤❤️💙🖤❤️ 
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