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naughtyneganjdm · 1 year

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On the Run - Chapter 2

Summary: Y/N's birthday party doesn't go as planned as shocking discoveries and big events sends her night into a tailspin.

Characters: Joel Miller (The Last of Us), Negan (The Walking Dead), the reader (OC, third person), etc.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/47007172/chapters/118549708

Warnings: Swearing, super angst, heavy touching, etc.

Notes: This is a longer chapter, but there is a lot of action in it and lots of things going on. Thanks to anyone that is reading this!

After their dinner together, Negan took Y/N home to see that people had already set things up for her party. Even though her father wanted nothing to do with her, she assumed that he helped set up the party because he only wanted the best of the best to be seen at his home. When people started showing up at the house for her party, she started realizing that many of the faces that were showing up she barely even knew. The people that came were here for a party and not to celebrate her special day.

That fact alone made things rather mundane for her and depressing. Considering how she felt today, she wished she would have just arranged a small get together with the people she did love and care for. Instead she let her rage for her father rule her decisions which only made her feel worse. Really she wished she could have just been meeting Joel’s daughter tonight like she wanted to. Maybe that made her a weirdo, but after almost two years of having the relationship they did, Y/N thought what she had with Joel meant more than it actually did. It was saddening to know that something she put so much passion into made her feel so bad. It reminded her that Joel hadn’t gotten her a gift for her birthday and he hadn’t even bothered to write her since they separated this evening. It made her wonder if what happened at his office today was the end of their relationship in general.

With so many people getting drunk and being plastered she didn’t feel like drinking. Getting drunk would only make her drown in her sadness even more. So after being harassed about a dozen times from strangers asking her why she wasn’t drinking she just pretended she was. Holding a glass made people believe she was partying too which made them leave her alone. With how bad she was feeling, alcohol would only intensify things for her and she wanted to avoid feeling worse about things.

“There you are!” a voice boasted from beside Y/N from where she was sitting by the pool in the backyard of her father’s massive home. Music was booming, people were surrounding her partying and having a good time, but Y/N would be lying if she said she was having a good time. All that was on her mind was all the time, energy and effort she wasted into the relationship that she put into things with Joel. Gazing beside her, she saw that it was her best friend Poppy kneeling down beside her. “Babe, how much have you had to drink?”

“I don’t know,” Y/N didn’t want to be honest that she hadn’t drank at all. Poppy was the life of the party and if she knew that Y/N hadn’t been drinking she would insist on Y/N getting absolutely wasted. And Y/N didn’t feel like doing that right now. Which meant she had to lie to her best friend. “Too much.”

“I have someone that I want you to meet. His name is Jamie. He’s a soccer player, huge cock. It will make you forget that boyfriend immediately,” Poppy pointed off in the distance toward where a group of people were and Y/N immediately waved her hand in the air to dismiss the suggestion. “Come on girl. It’s your birthday and you’re just depressing the hell out of everyone here sitting here and sulking. Have sex. Enjoy yourself. Do something to have fun.”

“I don’t want to,” Y/N insisted sitting up on the seat that she had been stretched out on. Gazing back over her shoulder, she could see that at the back of the crowd Negan was leaning against the house surveying over the party. “If I had sex with someone, I wouldn’t want it to be some random ass stranger. But I truthfully don’t want to have sex with anyone right now.”

“You know, you were a lot more fun before you started dating that boyfriend of yours,” Poppy pouted, folding her arms out in front of her chest and by the way that Poppy was slurring her words together, Y/N knew she was drunk as a skunk. “You had no problem partying then.”

“Well, I want different things in my life now than I did then,” Y/N realized that she had grown up in the last few years. When she was younger, she thrived on the idea of pissing her father off by being a mess. Now, she just wanted to be something more. Her own person. And she wanted to be happy. She thought she would get that with Joel, but after today she wasn’t sure that was going to happen.

This environment used to be everything that Y/N enjoyed because it helped her forget the life she was actually living. It fogged her brain enough to help her forget that she had a shitty family where people didn’t really care for her except for her money. So partying and having fun was where she felt like she belonged, but the closer she got to being on her own, the more she realized it was just a bunch of bullshit anyways. Poppy was her best friend and she loved her, but she was pretty sure they wanted different things at this point. Finishing her degree off with a good grade appealed to Y/N and college only meant awesome parties and environments for Poppy.

Deep in her thoughts, Y/N was still watching Negan keeping a close eye on the party. Eventually in time, his eyes connected with hers and she felt her heart rate quicken. When Negan saw that she was staring out at him, he smirked and waved his hand giving a bob of his head. Even in her woes and sadness, the sight of his dimples sinking in made her smile and she lowered her head down. “I’m not the same as I used to be.”

In their small interaction, Poppy had noticed the unspoken moment between Negan and Y/N making her gasp out and place her hand in over the center of her chest while she stumbled as she moved forward toward Y/N.

“Are you hot for Negan again?” Poppy wondered reaching out to smack her hand over Y/N’s shoulder making Y/N wince. “How long are you going to let that flame go on? How many times did you try to hook up with him in the past? He was too afraid of your father to hook up with you.”

“That’s not…that’s not why we didn’t hook up,” she immediately shook her head setting the glass down on the ground beside her. “He was married Poppy and he loved his wife. I don’t think he gives a shit what my father thought.”

“Everyone cares what your father thinks,” Poppy responded taking her time to gaze over the party that was taking place. “You’re just being so boring tonight Y/N. If you want Negan to fuck you, just go ask him. I’m sure he will since you said his wife died. Maybe he needs a pick me up fuck as much as you do babe.”

“Poppy,” she let out a disgusted breath hearing her friend laugh and shrug her shoulders. Poppy was eying over Negan from where they were seated and Poppy tipped her head from side to side. “What?”

“If you don’t ask him to fuck you, I will ask him to fuck me,” Poppy vowed making Y/N groan and stand up from the chair that she was in. Even the idea of Poppy attempting to jump the one person that Y/N had steady in her life grossed her out. Pulling herself up to her feet, Y/N felt Poppy quick to follow her and she held her hand up in the air to distance herself. “I didn’t mean to offend you. I’m just saying he’s a total babe. The older he gets the hotter he gets. I know you have a thing for the slightly graying daddy type.”

“At least I have a type, as opposed to someone who will fuck just about anything,” Y/N cringed seeing the amused expression over Poppy’s face.

“You act like that’s a bad thing. I see that as an opportunity to try a little bit of everything that is out there,” Poppy reached out to squeeze over Y/N’s shoulders not taking offense at all to Y/N’s little snarky comment. “If you tried it once in a while, I think you’d be happy.”

“I’m good,” Y/N assured her knowing that the last thing she needed right now was more unstable relationships in her life.

“I’m just saying honey there are so many people here for you and you’re stuck in your own head,” Poppy urged her to look around the party. What Poppy saw was the opposite of what Y/N saw. These were people that weren’t here for her. She knew that.

“The people aren’t here for me. They are here to party and for the free booze,” Y/N claimed with a half laugh and a shake of her head. “Let me go inside and sober up a bit. Then I’ll come back out and try to mingle with some of the people here.”

“Good,” Poppy reached out to give her a big hug before gazing back over her shoulder at the guy she was trying to sell off on Y/N earlier. “If you don’t want him…”

“He’s all yours,” Y/N nodded her head in the direction allowing her friend to bounce off after her newest exploit and Y/N headed back toward the house. Heading away from the party, she stepped before Negan seeing the way that he smiled out at her. Placing her hand over the center of his chest, she leaned forward to whisper in his ear. “I’m pretending to be plastered. Please save me and get me out of here for a while.”

“Yes ma’am,” Negan gave her a wink catching her when she feigned being drunk. Hooking his arm firmly around her waist, Negan led her toward the house to get her out of the big crowd. When they got inside, she pointed in the direction that she wanted him to go leading them to her bedroom. Once they were inside, she locked the door and went over to drop down on top of the bed letting out an overwhelmed sigh. Negan stood beside the bed for a moment before doing the same to lay down beside her. It made her look over at him and he gave her a big cheesy smile. “Why are you running away from your party?”

“I’m not feeling it,” she answered dropping her hand down beside her on the bed and she felt Negan’s fingers hooking with hers while they stared up at the ceiling of her bedroom together. It was quiet, but the sounds of the music outside were still booming and she groaned. “I only did this party to piss off my dad but I think he enjoys these things more than I do. I didn’t even want a party.”

“You should do what you want with life Y/N. Pretending to be someone you aren’t isn’t the way to do things,” Negan whispered making her squeeze her fingers tighter around his. “Just do whatever you have to do to make yourself happy.”

“That’s the thing Negan, I don’t think people would enjoy the real me. I thought I was special growing up, but I’m really not. I’m just some rich guy’s daughter. And truthfully, I don’t even know where my father made his money. I think my dad is actually a really bad person, but I never started to question it until recently,” she explained turning to look at Negan seeing that he had been watching her while she was talking. “My mother left for a reason, right?”

Negan said nothing, his eyes shifted and she nodded her head, “Yeah, I thought so.”

“I don’t know everything about your father Y/N. My job is you,” Negan reminded her knowing that his silence made her believe that he was confirming for her that her father was a bad person. “I just know normal people don’t need a bodyguard to watch their daughter’s every move. Even if they are rich as fuck.”

“And now he’s running for governor,” she mocked her father with a bob of her head and sighed when she slid in closer to Negan so she didn’t feel so awkward being alone. “Maybe I’m just like him.”

“You’re not,” Negan denied her claim almost immediately, his deep raspy voice drawing her attention. “You were questionable as a teenager, but you’re a good person Y/N. You want to help people. You care about people. You want to better the world not make it yours. With your father, I want to believe that he’s good even after some of the questionable things he has done. With Lucille and the cancer, he gave us a sizeable amount of money to help her after he told me that he wouldn’t give me a loan. I think he just wanted to look like a badass shithead in front of Simon, but…”

Negan heard the sound of Y/N’s breathing changing and she sat up in the bed confusing him when he did the same, “What is it?”

“Nothing,” she waved her hand in the air dismissively and he sat there for a minute thinking about her response to what he was telling her about her father. Something seemed to be circling in Negan’s mind when he turned to look at her with his right eyebrow arched. “What?”

“Was it you?” Negan cleared his throat watching the way the color drained from her face and he slid back, his eyebrows furrowing with a sense of emotions she couldn’t read. “You’re the one that gave us the money?”

“I heard you talking to my father about Lucille’s cancer and I knew how much you loved her,” she alerted him to what she had done seeing the way that his hazel eyes got bigger. It was something that she never wanted to confess to him but hearing him giving the credit to her father was just hard to hear because she knew her father was an asshole for denying Negan originally. “When he told you no, I wasn’t okay with that. I had seen my father give money to so many people that were undeserving. You had been taking care of me for so long and Lucille deserved the best care. I just lied and told my father I was taking an expensive trip. Went and stayed with Poppy for a while. That was the one time I could get away with things because you weren’t constantly on my ass. So I was able to lie then and get away with it.”

“Why…why didn’t you tell me that?” Negan searched her eyes seeing that she was getting upset and he didn’t understand why.

“Because I couldn’t save her for you,” she whimpered making a breath catch in Negan’s throat. It was when Negan’s eyes teared over that she had to force herself to look away from him. “They say money can help anyone, but she still died. I couldn’t save her.”

“You’re not a miracle worker Y/N. She had pancreatic cancer,” Negan pointed out watching her move over toward the window and he stood up from the bed following her not far behind. “The survival rate for that is incredibly small. But what you did do extended her life. With that money I was able to make her comfortable. We had more time together alone so I could be with her. That money helped us. I just wish you would have told me.”

“It doesn’t matter where the money came from,” she concluded hating that money was such a big deal in life but she knew it was. It’s why she didn’t see giving Joel money as a problem when he asked her. Sometimes giving someone money would help save someone and she was hoping to help people instead of taking from people like her father had likely done. “I’m the daughter of a piece of shit Negan. If he turned down helping you and your dying wife who knows what else my father has done. I can’t escape the sins of my father no matter how hard I try. I couldn’t even help your wife. I can’t make people fall in love with me. I think my father just hangs over my head and he will be there for the rest of my life.”

“Hey,” Negan turned her to face him seeing that she was actually genuinely upset about this whole thing. Cupping her face in his hands, he shook his head and traced his thumbs over the sides of her face. “Your father does not define you. People might make you think he does, but he doesn’t. You are your own person. Your heart is so fucking big.”

Lifting her head up, she could see that Negan’s eyes were still damp making her heart break. The way he swept at the tears over her face made her pulse leap and she felt a lump growing in her throat. With the closeness of the two of them and the way he was staring down at her she felt a chill flood her body. “You can kiss me.”

“What?” Negan smirked thinking that she was joking at first when he pulled his hands away from her face and slid his hands into his pockets. The way he pulled back and away made her face flush over and she let out a defeated breath.

“God, I am so stupid,” she huffed, moving over toward the bed to drop back down on the side of it. Grabbing the pack of cupcakes that Negan had gotten for her, she popped open the container and peeled back the wrapper on one of them to take a big bite. “Why the fuck would you want to kiss me? I’m sorry. I’m so fucking dumb right now and I’m misreading all the signals.”

“Y/N…” Negan sat down on the bed beside her, reaching out to place his hand in over her shoulder in what she assumed was his way of comforting her and turning her down. Before he could say anything, she took what was rest of the cupcake and shoved it into his mouth surprising him with the gesture making his hazel eyes grow wide. Attempting to chew what she had shoved in his mouth, Negan tipped his head back and saw the way she smiled when he spoke with a mouthful. “What the hell was that?”

“I felt like whatever you were about to say would have made this whole thing awkward, so I stopped you before you did,” she clarified making Negan snort and reach up to try to wipe away at the frosting that was left over his face. “You missed a whole lot of it.”

“Oh?” Negan felt her leaning forward to wipe at his short salt and pepper colored beard in attempts to collect the frosting. A gasp fell from her throat when she felt Negan smearing some of the frosting that he had on his fingers across her face. “You’re welcome.”

“You dick,” she hissed going to reach for the tissues that were beside her bed, but the sensation of Negan cupping her face in his hands was felt when he led her mouth to his. It felt like the world stood still when Negan’s lips claimed hers in a long draw out kiss that made her eyes to close. Leaning forward closer to the kiss, she enjoyed the way that his thumbs stroked at the side of her face in a comforting sweep. The taste of the cupcake still lingered over his lips and when she pulled away, she took notice of the way that Negan’s eyes stared down at her lips. “Wow.”

“Not bad for a first kiss,” Negan dragged his thumb across her bottom lip, his eyebrows bouncing up before a wicked smirk tugged at his lips. “Although, it was a bit too fucking sweet for me.”

“Oh, ha-ha,” she picked up on the fact that they had frosting still over their faces knowing that he was making a joke.

Going to speak up again, she was silenced by his lips covering hers again and she kissed him back this time enjoying the way that his fingers stroked through her hair in an intimate fashion which took her breath away when she pulled back to look him over. Negan’s eyelids were heavy, his breathing loud while the warmth of it drew chills down her spine. Pushing forward she kissed Negan’s lips, her hand settling in against the side of his neck. Parting her lips, she felt the warmth of Negan’s tongue brushing against hers making her whimper into his mouth.

Sinking her fingers into his hair, she sucked faintly at his tongue and leaned back onto her bed using her free hand to pull him in over her. Carefully Negan followed her movements and braced his weight on his hands when she palmed down in over the side of his face. Nuzzling his nose in against hers, Negan was careful when he laid in over her making a loud exhale fall from her lips.

“There is so much more to you than you think there is,” Negan whispered tracing her bottom lip with his thumb and she pressed a faint kiss against the pad of his thumb. Taking his thumb between her parted lips, she nibbled at it before tracing her tongue over it. “Y/N…”

Curling her fingers around the back of his neck, she led him back to her for them to kiss and she felt her body getting hot all over. Kiss after addictive kiss left her wanting more so when Negan pulled back, she felt her body shaking, “You’re a good kisser.”

“Thanks,” Negan smirked, his nose wrinkling in amusement. Reaching for a tissue, Negan helped to clean the rest of the frosting from her face before wiping at his own. Tossing the tissue he stared down at her and sighed while he stroked over her features. “You’re beautiful, you know that?”

A surprised breath fell from his throat when she placed her hand over the center of his chest to give it a small amount of pressure to get him onto his back. Crawling in over him, she heard his nervous exhale fill the air when she rest over his hips. Swallowing down hard, he watched the way her palms slid up from his hips toward his lower abdomen and he bit down on his bottom lip. With the warmth of their skin-to-skin contact, he tipped his head back and closed his eyes enjoying the way that it felt to have her touching his slender torso. With her fingers teasing through the thick dark hair covering his flesh, Negan could see that her eyes were full of want and lust. Licking his lips, Negan closed his eyes and let out a tense breath. “We should stop.”

“No,” she shook her head getting the material of Negan’s shirt balled up at the center of his chest finally getting to see the length of his long torso. Lowering down, she pressed hot wet kisses over Negan’s chest making him take in a sharp breath. Teasing her tongue over Negan’s nipple had his back arching up toward her and his moan drove her crazy when she nipped at his flesh. Kissing down over Negan’s abdomen had him breathing unevenly when she reached his pants. Trying to unhook his belt, she felt Negan’s hands grabbing a hold of hers and he shook his head. “It’s okay.”

“No…” Negan hushed her sitting up on her bed allowing his shirt to fall back into place. Trying to gain back his sense of control, Negan kept his hands over her shoulders and could see the confusion in her eyes. “We shouldn’t be doing this. Not now.”

“It’s okay Negan. You’ve been so good to me,” she moved forward to kiss him again, flicking her tongue out over his bottom lip making him groan out. Dropping her right hand down she pressed it over the center of Negan’s pants palming in over his body making Negan’s eyes come to a close. His lips parted and a sharp exhale fell from them. Leaning in she kissed down over his jawline and could feel him getting hard beneath the material of his pants. “Just let me show you some appreciation for how good you’ve been to me.”

“Y/N,” his moan was rasp and quiet while she caressed over his length. With her left hand she tugged at his belt working to pull it open. When she got the material apart and reached for the button in his pants, Negan hopped up from the bed and headed over toward the window to try to catch his breath. “Fuck, fuck.”

“Negan?” she felt her heart hammering in her chest and her throat went dry. Hearing the sounds of him pulling his belt back together made her feel lost for words. “Am I not appealing to you? I don’t understand.”

“God, that’s not it,” Negan commented turning on his heel to look back at her as he caressed his hand down over his face. Stress flooded his handsome, chiseled features and more than anything she wanted to be kissing him again. “You are sad and depressed. It’s your birthday and if I let something happen, I would be taking advantage.”

“No, you wouldn’t. You would be making me feel not so fucking pathetic,” she stood up from the bed throwing her hand out hearing him huff.

“You love Joel,” Negan reminded her, his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat making the expression over her face change. Folding her arms out in front of her chest, she looked down and let out a sigh. “I’d be a piece of shit to allow you to do what you were just about to fucking do.”

“I’ve loved you for a long time,” she confessed making Negan let out a hesitant breath before tipping his head from side to side.

“It’s a bit different,” Negan countered knowing that she had a crush on him from the start but crushing on someone and loving someone that you thought you were in a relationship with was completely different. “I think you’re beautiful. Lord knows how much I care about you. I just know the difference between right and fucking wrong. And as hard as my dick is right now, I’m gonna suffer the blue balls because I know you enough to know that you don’t need this. What you need right now is a friend.”

“I don’t know, the kissing was pretty good,” she conceded to that fact making Negan chuckle and nod his head. Even though she knew her body wanted something different, she stepped forward and held her arms out. Without question he accepted the hug and squeezed her tightly in his arms. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Negan kissed at her temple squeezing her tightly in his arms. Even though her body was telling her something else, she knew that Negan was right. Sleeping with Negan would only make things more complicated. Leave it to Negan to be the only smart person in her life that thought about her future instead of right now. A familiar ring tone started to play from Y/N’s pocket making Negan groan out when he recognized who it was. “Speak of the devil.”

Immediately Y/N pulled away from the hug and reached for her pocket. Pulling out the phone Negan could see that it was Joel calling her and the excitement that flooded into her eyes made Negan sigh loudly and step back. That was exactly why he wouldn’t let things go forward tonight. How Y/N felt about Joel was all he needed to see in order for him to back off.

Y/N took a minute to gather herself before answering, “Hello?”

“Can you break away from your party?” Joel’s southern drawl rumbled at the other end of the phone. It made her heart skip a beat when she stepped back and away from Negan. Negan’s head lowered, his jaw flexing when she was visibly excited about Joel calling her. “Because I’m outside.”

“Bullshit,” she choked going to the window to see that Joel’s truck was indeed outside in front of her house.

“Meet me out front,” Joel instructed her before hanging up. Sliding her phone back into her pocket, Y/N realized that she had to be smiling a ridiculous amount.

“Joel is here,” she informed Negan who simply just smirked and nodded. Heading for the door, she stopped when she went to reach for the handle and cleared her throat. Looking back over her shoulder she could see that Negan’s face was flushed and he seemed to be contemplating things in his head. “Negan?”

“Yeah?” Negan didn’t look up, his voice was quiet making her panic.

“Are we okay?” she inquired making Negan slowly lift his head and give her a nod. “What just happened.”

“I know what it was. It’s an emotional day for you and sometimes that makes us do questionable things,” Negan assured her that everything was okay, feigning a smile. That’s what he did a lot lately. Smiled through everything knowing that it would make people believe him that everything was okay. “Don’t worry about me.”

There was so much she should have said, but she didn’t. She just pulled open the door and noticed that Negan was following her down the stairs toward the front door. When they got to the door she stopped and looked back at Negan. “Could you hang back a little bit?”

“I won’t be up your ass,” Negan stressed following her outside and she looked to see that he leaned against the front of the house. The expression over Negan’s face showed that he wasn’t enthused with the whole thing, but when he pointed his fingers forward, she looked behind her to see that Joel was getting out of the truck.

In one hand he had a cake and in the other he had a bouquet of flowers. Stepping forward, she could see Joel’s dark eyes staring out at her and she couldn’t help but smile, “What are you doing here?”

“I heard it was someone’s birthday and figured I would drop in,” Joel explained with an uneven breath, his head tipping down. The way his chocolate brown eyes were staring out at her took her breath away when he held out the flowers for her to take. When she accepted them, Joel weakly smiled and nodded toward the cake. “Truthfully? I reckon what you said today stuck with me because I started talking to Sarah tonight about you. We were watching a movie together and I guess I was acting different. She asked me what was up and I told her that there was a woman that I was seeing. It was her birthday and I hadn’t done anything nice for it because I didn’t know what to call the feelings that I had for her.”

“You talked about me to your daughter?” she couldn’t help but swoon hearing that bit knowing that it was all she had really wanted from the start. Joel gave her a nod when he held the cake forward for her to look at it. It was a sheet cake that said happy birthday with her name on it with a few balloons that were piped in with icing. “What’s this?”

“Well, it’s a store-bought cake that she demanded me to get for you. I know it’s not gourmet like something you would get normally, but Sarah insisted…” Joel motioned her to wait putting the cake in the back of his truck bed so he could reach for something in his back pocket. “She also makes these little bracelet things, I uh, I don’t know what to call them. I have one…” Joel held his wrist up to show that he had one as well. “She wanted me to give you one for your birthday.”

“This is from your daughter?” she questioned with a half-smile, stepping forward when Joel worked to get the bracelet around her wrist by tying it on her. Once she had it on, she pulled it back to look it over and she could see that Joel seemed proud of it. “You really talked to your daughter about me?”

“Well, I left out some details about our relationship,” Joel concluded with a nervous smile, his eyebrows furrowing when he reached out to grab a hold of Y/N’s hand that wasn’t holding onto the flowers that he had given her. “But yeah, I talked to Sarah about you. I know that a cake and flowers isn’t a great gift. I should have thought something out for your birthday. I’m sorry I didn’t do that. I…care about you Y/N. I care about you a lot.”

Gasping, Joel felt her jumping into his arms and a laugh fell deep from within his throat when she wrapped her legs around his waist and her arms around his shoulders to give him a big hug. Spinning her in his arms, Joel couldn’t help but laugh pressing a kiss over her lips when she pulled back to look at him.

“You’re happy?” Joel inquired, his eyebrow arching in curiosity while her free hand reached up to caress through his messy dark hair.

“So happy,” she answered moving down from his arms to place her flowers he had gotten her by the cake he put in the back of his truck. “This is the best gift I could have asked for.”

“Good,” Joel stepped forward tracing his thumb over the side of her face making her tip her head back to look up at him. Bringing them closer together, Joel wrapped his left arm loosely around her waist seeing the awe that was in her eyes. “I’m an idiot.”

“So am I,” she whispered knowing that she had been doing something stupid only moments earlier because she was in such a saddened state from what happened between the two of them. “Listen, I know I should have been more relaxed about things. I was being clingy and too needy. I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have to say that I love you to me if you don’t feel it.”

“No, don’t blame yourself,” Joel hushed her, leaning to press a kiss over her lips that made her step up onto the tips of her toes. Nibbling at her bottom lip, Joel growled when he leaned back and cleared his throat. “I want to talk to you about something. It’s kind of serious. Do you think you can sneak away with me for a while?”

“Of course,” she looked back over her shoulder to see Negan staring out at the two of them and she suddenly felt guilty noticing the expression over his face. Clearing her throat uneasily, she stepped back and caressed her thumbs over the back of Joel’s hands. “I’m going to go somewhere with Joel.”

“You don’t have to follow, I’ve got her,” Joel assured Negan seeing the way Negan’s head tipped and his jaw flexed. “I know it’s your job, but I’ve got her. I won’t let anything happen to her.”

“Joel Miller,” a voice boomed from behind them making Joel turn on his heel. With a nervous breath Y/N felt Joel releasing her when she noticed that her father had just gotten home from the fundraiser that he was at. It was surprising because she didn’t think her father would be home this early. With an amused rumble of a sound, her father clapped his hands together before pointing at Joel. “It is you. God, you’ve gotten a bit of gray in your beard and your hair, but that’s you! What the hell are you doing here?”

“He’s here for me,” Y/N clarified reaching down to hook her fingers with Joel’s seeing the way that Joel just completely shut down in front of her father. It made her want to protect Joel but is response to her father surprised her. Joel always acted like he wasn’t someone that knew a lot about people like her father, so to see him react so strangely to him made her worry. “Joel is my boyfriend.”

“What?” Philip snapped, his eyes gazing between Joel and Y/N before he let out a disgusted breath. “I knew you didn’t have taste Y/N, but sleeping with the help?”

“What?” she breathed out, gazing over her shoulder at Joel to see that his eyes were looking down toward the ground and his jaw was flexed. “What do you mean?”

“You don’t remember?” Philip snapped his fingers and in the distance Y/N could see that Negan was getting closer noticing that the situation was starting to get weird. “I know you were young, but he was around a lot for quite some time.”

“No, I only have been in a relationship with him for almost two years. I think you’re confused,” she alerted her father looking over at Joel who had lifted his head, his eyes connecting with hers. There was something different in the way that he was looking at her and she let out a hesitant sound. “Wait, how do you know his name? I’ve never introduced the two of you or brought him here. And I know Negan didn’t tell you.”

“Honey, you don’t remember when I had this house built?” Philip pointed back to the huge home that was behind them and he was rather dramatic in the way he said it. “Young Joel here was who we hired to do it. Well, he’s not young anymore, but he was then. In fact Joel was here for most of the house being built before I fired him.”

Slowly releasing Joel’s hand, Y/N could see that Joel’s face was scrunching up in anger, his face turning red when her father stepped in closer to him clearly trying to piss him off, “Joel here was the man in charge. Had an incredible vision and he was the main contractor that I hired on. Everything was going well until I showed up one day unannounced to see that the man in charge wasn’t here. When he misses a day of work, I know that he can’t be that serious about this job.”

“My daughter was sick,” Joel reminded Philip, his voice deep and angry while Philip made a tsking sound to almost mock Joel. “You fired me for missing half a day to take care of my daughter and then you never paid me.”

“Took your whole crew too,” Philip chuckled seeing the way that Joel’s expression grew deep in fury. Philip waved his hand in the air in a very dramatic manner before laughing out. “You know Joel here tried to sue me for it too. My lawyers chewed his ass up. Someone as insignificant and unimportant as Joel Miller wasn’t going to leave any kind of impact on my life.”

“Stop it,” Y/N asked of her father seeing his face wrinkle up in amusement while he looked between Y/N and Joel. Her father was upsetting Joel and she hated the things that he was saying to him.

“That’s why you’re here, isn’t it? You’ve held onto that shit for this long?” Philip questioned, his eyes locking with Joel’s again whose body was completely tense and his face twisting with anger. “Are you fucking my daughter for some kind of sense of revenge? Oh Joel. Please. That’s not revenge. I already know she’s an idiot.”

“Hey,” Negan spoke up seeing the way that Philip looked back at him and Negan could see that Y/N was getting upset hearing everything that was just revealed to her. “Enough.”

“I’m assuming you didn’t tell me about this because you didn’t know?” Philip pointed between Y/N and Joel. “Then again you weren’t here when that happened so I can’t exactly blame you. That was long before your time. I wish you would have let me know that my daughter was sleeping with the scum though.”

“Listen here,” Joel growled, stopping when he felt Negan’s hand placing in over the center of his chest to keep him back so he didn’t get in trouble for touching Philip. “You’re a piece of shit.”

“No, I’m not. I’m the future governor, Joel,” Philip snorted stepping in closer to Joel making Joel tip his head back so Joel could stare up at him with his angry eyes. “You’re the piece of shit. You’re nothing. And you’re fucking the embarrassment of the family. Did you really think that would affect me in any way?”

“No, he didn’t know that I was your daughter,” Y/N tried to reason, shaking her head making her father laugh and his nose wrinkle. Joel’s body tensed up and he looked back over his shoulder at her. “You didn’t know he was my father, right?”

Joel said nothing leaving Philip to release a big belly laugh when she clearly realized what he was saying was true, “God, I knew you were stupid, but this is a new level honey,” Philip chastised his daughter rolling his eyes and looking back toward the house. Shifting on his feet, Philip started to head back toward the house taking slow back steps with every move he made. Tossing his hands up, Philip sighed and his men followed him as well. “As far as I’m concerned Joel, you can have her. I don’t want her to be part of this family anymore anyways. Enjoy both of you being a fucking joke together.”

“Don’t,” Negan stopped Joel from going after Philip knowing that it would only cause nothing but nightmares for Joel if he went have Philip and tried to hit him. “Your life is not worth whatever it is that he did. You do not want to fuck with him.”

“Let go of me,” Joel hissed pushing at Negan feeling like he was going to explode with the way that Philip had just talked to him. Everything inside of him wanted to attack Philip, but he knew that Negan was right. It would only fuck his life up all over again if he tried to attack Philip.

Once Philip was inside the house, Negan released Joel and looked back to see that Y/N had fallen back against Joel’s truck and she looked like she was on the verge of an absolute breakdown, “Joel?”

Turning on his heel, Joel looked back at Y/N seeing the way her eyes were swelling up with tears, “Please tell me it was a coincidence. That you didn’t know that I was his daughter at first and you only found out later.”

Uneven breaths fell from Joel’s throat, his head lowering when he heard Y/N start to cry since his lack of words said everything for her, “Holy shit. I really am the dumbest piece of shit, aren’t I?”

All that was heard was the music from the party at the back of the house and she stepped forward to wipe at her eyes with the back of her hand, “So was I really that good of a student or did you just see my name and knew that you had to do something to get back at my father?”

Joel hung his head low, simply shrugging his shoulders and she felt her heart racing. At that moment she felt like she could die with the way that she was feeling, “I’m not talented like you said I am, are I? It was all fake.”

“You’re talented,” Joel whispered, his lips parting when he shook his head. “But you’re nothing I haven’t seen before. You’re the top of your class. But there are others just as good as you.”

The way Joel’s eyebrows furrowed and his dark eyes slowly lifted up to stare out at her made her let out a hurt sound, “It doesn’t matter though. Your father’s name attached to yours will get you a job anywhere you want.”

“Wow,” she stammered feeling the daggers in that statement being thrown at her. Those words made the air leave her lungs and she felt pathetic hearing everything she just did. “Everything is starting to make sense.”

“No, it’s not,” Joel responded, stepping forward but it made her step back and away from him. “Yes, it started off in a very poor light. I was trying to give it back to your father. Fucking his precious daughter. Getting her to fund my company that he fucking ruined. I know that’s shit, but the more time I spent with you the more I started to realize that I actually like you.”

“So you didn’t like me from the start?” she pushed seeing Joel’s jaw flexing and his hands went straight to his hips. “Now the rough sex makes sense. It was you getting your anger out and using me to do it. I just thought that was the way you liked things so I did whatever you liked to make you happy.”

“I don’t think that’s something we should talk about in front of Negan,” Joel felt uncomfortable that Y/N’s personal bodyguard was hearing everything she was saying.

“Like he doesn’t fucking know,” she screamed at Joel making Joel shift on his feet and he looked flustered to be standing before her right now. “I didn’t even stand out to you, did I? It was just the name.”

“I don’t know what you want me to say here,” Joel reasoned with her, throwing his right hand up hearing her crying. “Your father fucked me over. I lost my company. I lost a shitload of money. It took forever for me to fix my life. I had a daughter and your father completely fucked me and my family over.”

“So that’s why you asked for the money?” she shuddered seeing the way that Joel gulped and she shook her head. “So was this fake the whole time? Were you just pretending in order to get closer to me so you could fuck with my father? Get the money back that you were owed?”

“Yes and no,” Joel went to step forward to touch her, but Negan stepped between the two of them and shoved into Joel’s chest.

“Don’t fucking touch her,” Negan warned making Joel scoff and give his attention to Negan.

“Don’t start with me you fucking stalker. You get paid to be a fucking stalker so you don’t have a fucking say,” Joel shoved Negan back making Negan snarl. “Why don’t you go run off after your master and report back to him like a good boy.”

A grunt filled the air when Negan threw his fist out and hit Joel firmly in the face making Joel stumble backwards with a grunt, “I have been wanting to do that all fucking day.”

It took Joel a moment to gather himself before a roar filled the air and Joel launched himself at Negan tackling him to the ground hard. Grunts and scoffs were heard while the two fought on the ground before Y/N and she was at a complete loss not knowing what to do, “Stop.”

Neither of them listened to her as she tried to reach down to grab a hold of Joel who had just gotten Negan onto his back. Her arms hooked around Joel’s so he couldn’t hit Negan and she let out a grunt when Joel shoved her back making her trip over her own two feet hitting the ground hard.

“Fuck,” Joel scrambled to try to help her get up since she took a rather hard fall.

“Stop,” she begged of Negan when he went to go after Joel after Joel had helped her up from the ground. Standing between the two of them, she didn’t know what she was even doing right now, but she didn’t need the two of them fighting. They were disheveled but other than maybe a few red marks they hadn’t completely destroyed one another yet. “Joel, do you really care about me? Did you really tell your daughter about me?”

“I didn’t lie about that,” Joel scoffed holding up his wrist to compare the two bracelets. “Yes, I talked to my daughter about you. Did this relationship start off the way you think it did? Yeah. It did. I saw your name, I knew who you were and I took advantage. I just got lucky that you obviously have daddy issues and you were attracted to older men. It took a while, but you rubbed off on me Y/N. You’re…special. I know that you are. I took advantage of a good person which is why…”

A loud popping sound filled the air making all of them jump and Joel looked back over his shoulder where the sound came from, “the fuck was that?”

“Hey,” Negan reached for Joel getting him to turn back to face them and he saw that there was blood over Joel’s face. “You’re bleeding.”

“I’m not…” Joel reached up to wipe at his face only to look up when realization struck him.

“Joel?” Y/N breathed out touching her arm after she jolted back. Seeing the blood that was over her fingers made her let out a wince when she looked to her arm to see that she had a deep flesh wound there. “Negan?”

“Get down,” Negan tackled both Joel and Y/N to the ground to the best of his ability when multiple gunshots started to fill the air and it was obvious by where they just shot that they were going for Y/N. Forcing both Joel and Y/N’s heads down, Negan did his best to survey the area. Philip’s bodyguards were starting to surround the place while the shots continued and they were aiming for Y/N. “We’ve gotta move. Go!”

They all scrambled to brace themselves against Joel’s truck and glass shattered above them from the windows of Joel’s truck being shot out. They all had their heads covered when Negan tried to look back, but another window got shot out, “Fuck.”

“What is happening?” Y/N felt her body trembling from the adrenaline that was flooding her veins after being shot. Looking next to her she saw Negan pulling out a gun and she fell back in against Joel. “What the hell is that?”

“I’m your bodyguard Y/N. You had to know that I had a fucking gun,” Negan snapped, reaching out to make sure that both Joel and Y/N were down when he popped out enough to shoot back at whoever was shooting in the distance from the trees. It was enough to stop the shooting when he nodded over toward his Mustang that was a few cars down. “We have to get to my Mustang so we can get out of here.”

“My truck is right here,” Joel hissed out going to get up but another shot filled the air and he dropped back to the ground.

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed or not genius, but your fucking truck is Swiss fucking cheese right now,” Negan snarled hearing Joel let out a roar. Motioning Joel and Y/N to crawl first, Negan popped up again to shoot off his gun a few times as warning shots. “Go, go, go!”

The lack of shooting alerted Negan to the fact that the shooter was likely reloading his weapon and this was their only chance to get away. When he got to the car, Joel tugged on the handle and looked back when it wouldn’t open, “Can you drive?”

“Of course I can fucking drive,” Joel snarled when Negan tossed him his keys and Joel opened the door to crawl into the car having a bit of trouble getting across to the driver’s seat.

“What the hell are you guys doing?” someone questioned from behind them making both Negan and Y/N look back to see that Poppy was standing there with a glass of champagne in her hand. “You’re supposed to be opening your gifts, yet you’re out here crawling on the ground with Negan?”

“Poppy, what are you doing?” Negan snapped seeing Y/N’s best friend standing around like nothing was happening. A rumble of an engine starting was heard and Negan could tell that Joel started the car. “Get out of here.”

“Get down Poppy,” Y/N urged her friend seeing the way that Poppy tipped her head to the side confused.

“Listen, I get it you’re doing something weird and different because you had your heart broken, but the two of us have never been separated on your birthday,” Poppy slurred jumping when the glass in her hand shattered and she looked to it with a frown. “Well that was strange.”

“Fuck it, get in the backseat,” Negan pushed the seat forward and shoved Poppy into the backseat behind Joel. When Negan started to push at Y/N to get her in the backseat as well, he could feel her fighting him on it. “What?”

“I’m claustrophobic,” she reminded him hearing Negan groan out when he tried to push her into the back again. “Negan you know I hate tight spaces. I’m going to freak the fuck out and…”

Shots started to fill the air again when Joel smacked the back of the seat, “Unless you want to fucking die, I suggest you get in the car because it’s you they are aiming for.”

“Get in the bloody car,” Poppy called out making Y/N push forward into the backseat and Negan scrambled to get the seat back into place before hopping in. Even before Negan had the door closed Joel was gunning it to get the fuck out of there. The sound of the back window shattering was heard making Negan snarl out as he got his gun ready. “Are we being shot at?”

“Yes Poppy, we are being shot at,” Negan snapped from the front seat, pulling open the glove compartment to grab another gun that was inside making Joel hiss out and hit the wheel with his hand. “What’s wrong with you?”

“I just can’t believe this is fucking happening,” Joel exclaimed with an angered breath, using the rearview mirror to see that there was an SUV following them making him hiss out. “On our ass Negan.”

“I see it,” Negan announced rolling the window down, looking to Joel with a huff. “Put some gas on it Joel. I thought you were from fucking Texas.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean? That I’m used to car chases and fucking getting shot at?” Joel screamed out at Negan with a hiss when he pressed the gas pedal further down making all of them jolt at how fast he was starting to drive now. “I don’t want to kill anyone.”

“Then drive good,” Negan demanded hearing the sound of a gun going off making all of them duck down. Reaching behind him, Negan urged both Y/N and Poppy to lower their heads down to keep them safe. “Stay down.”

“Holy shit, you’re bleeding. A lot,” Poppy finally realized the blood that was covering Y/N’s arm and she let out a surprised squeal when another shot went off and hit the car this time. Luckily the bullet didn’t hit any of them. “Were you shot?”

“Yeah Poppy, I was,” Y/N alerted her friend seeing Negan changing his positioning and she saw him pushing his upper half out the window so he could shoot at the SUV that was following them. “Joel, grab him!”

“I have to drive,” Joel retorted with an annoyed breath, reaching out to grab a hold of Negan’s pants to make sure that he didn’t fall out of the car while he controlled the car with his left hand. Each gunshot had the three in the car ducking down not sure whether it was coming from Negan or the car behind them. With a final shot, Joel could see in the rearview mirror that Negan had shot out the front wheel tire the SUV making it swerve and flip with a loud shattering sound. “Fucking hell…”

“That was amazing,” Poppy boasted looking back over her shoulder, jumping when she heard the booming sound of the car setting fire after it was hit by another car. “I feel like I’m in a James Bond movie right now and this is incredible.”

“This is not a movie Poppy,” Y/N hollered at her friend feeling winded after she did it and she looked to her arm. “I think I’m going to pass out.”

“What?” Joel quipped looking back over his shoulder at Y/N seeing the blood that was covering her arm making him panic. “Negan, she’s bleeding out.”

“No she isn’t. It’s a flesh wound. When we get somewhere I can help her, but right now we have to focus because…” a groan fell from his throat when a car hit them from behind and another side swiped them trying to get the car to flip, but Joel was able to control the wheel. “Fucking hell.”

“Why are these people trying to kill you?” Joel shot a look back at Y/N seeing that she looked pale and he felt his throat get dry. “Hey, focus.”

“I don’t know. I didn’t do anything, the only thing I can fucking think of is my dad,” she got out letting out a frustrated breath when she heard Negan shooting again and she tried to cover her ears feeling like she was about to have a panic attack with everything that was happening. “He’s only running for the governor. I don’t understand.”

“There’s a reason your father is surrounded by a security team babe,” Poppy pushed making Y/N swallow down hard. “The political world thinks your father is going to win the run for governor and quickly make his way up to the white house. He’s incredibly powerful.”

“You know politics?” Negan scoffed looking back at Y/N’s friend that he found to be a bit flighty, finding himself surprised when the sound of multiple gunshots filled the air making them all duck. “Joel, get us the fuck out of here!”

“I’m trying,” Joel shouted back at Negan dodging traffic the best he could on the highway in the middle of the night. Noticing that the two cars that were chasing them were starting to come up along the sides of the car made Joel grasp tightly to the wheel.

“This is a Mustang Joel, you can outdrive these people,” Y/N called out from the backseat hearing the hushing sound that came from Joel when he seemed to be waiting for the right moment. Both cars were swerving, hitting the Mustang to try to get it off the road.

“Brace yourselves,” Joel instructed slamming on the brakes making the wheels squeal and they watched the two cars smash into each other causing one of them to flip. The Mustang came to a complete stop as they watched the car that had flipped spinning out. The one that didn’t flip was spinning about before it turned to start heading back for them.

“Fuck this,” Negan shoved open the door making all of them tense up when he left with one of his handguns, leaving the other on the ground of the car.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Joel tried to reach out to grab Negan to get him back in, but Negan was already out of the car.

“Get back in the car,” Y/N demanded seeing the final remaining car was starting to gun it in their direction. Trying to grab a hold of Negan’s shirt to get him back in, she was only met with three loud booms making them all jump when she saw Negan shoot the driver’s side of the windshield. There was no questioning that Negan hit the driver when it swerved off the road and smashed into the wall. They were all silent when Negan got back into the car and gazed back at them. That was the last car that had been chasing them, but everything was lingering between the four of them. “You just killed that person.”

“I’m sure we killed more than one of them,” Negan reached for his phone putting in an address and tossing his phone to Joel who was staring out at him with his nervous brown eyes. “Get us here. Now.”

Without question, Joel started driving and a silence surrounded them showing that they were all shaken up from what was happening. Joel cleared his throat and gazed over at Negan with an uncomfortable breath, “First shoot out and person you’ve killed?”

“Yeah,” Negan swallowed down hard, his eyebrow arching up as he let out a deep rumble of an overwhelmed sound. Negan lowered his head into his hands and Joel could see that the girls looked terrified in the backseat.

“Where the hell are we going?” Y/N questioned, shakily reaching her fingers up to see that she was still bleeding pretty good.

“One of your father’s safe houses,” Negan explained with a shallow breath, his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat. “It’s the one he always gave me the address to if something went wrong. It’s secluded and by the water. We’ll be safe there.”

“Well so much for your birthday party,” Poppy spoke up making all of them tense when she made all of them uncomfortable. “I got you something really good too.”

Instead of responding, they all remained silent as Joel drove to the location. Negan wasn’t lying when he said it was in the middle of nowhere. It was deep in the woods and when he got to the address, the driveway they went up was a winding, long path. It was right off the water and big, just like what Y/N would expect from her father and she let out a disgusted breath when she saw it.

Once they parked, all of them were eager to get out of the car and Y/N braced herself back against the Mustang. Poppy had headed over toward the porch in front of the door to sit. Negan was knelt down in front of the car, his head buried in his hands and Joel was pacing.

“I have to go home,” Joel announced, throwing his hands up in the air drawing Negan’s attention when Negan lifted his expressive eyes to stare up at the smaller man. “I have a child at home. I shouldn’t be here.”

“You can’t go home. You were there and god knows who is involved in this. I originally thought there was one single shooter, but this is a big fucking thing Joel,” Negan stood up from where he was knelt down and dragged his right hand down over his face with a stressed breath. “Your truck was there.”

“What are you trying to say? You think these people would try going to my home?” Joel’s voice grew in anger, his brown eyes gazing between both Negan and Y/N. “Then I have to go home! I have a daughter and a brother at home. They could be in danger. I have to go back to them.”

“They are in more danger if you are with them,” Negan claimed reaching for his phone from Joel to look for a number. “I’m going to call someone that I trust more than anyone to take care of them. I’ll have him come and get your family. Take them to a place where no one else can find them. I swear to you. They will be safe.”

“No, no fucking way,” Joel shook his head stepping forward when Negan held his finger up to silence him. “They are the safest with me. No one can protect them better than me. I didn’t sign up for this fucking shit. I shouldn’t have even been at that fucking party.”

“Trust me. This is a guy that was a cop. He won’t let anything happen to them. He owes me one for saving his life,” Negan addressed Joel with a shake of his head. “We have a complicated relationship, but Rick Grimes is one man I can promise you will keep your family safe. I’ll have him go get them and then we can have your daughter call you so you know she is okay. I promise you, everything is going to be okay.”

“You can’t promise something like that,” Joel snarled making Negan shrug his shoulders while he was talking on the phone with someone on the other end. Hearing Negan telling the person on the other end his address made Joel let out a nervous sound. “How the hell do you know my address by heart?”

“It’s my job to know everything about you,” Negan rumbled making Joel let out an overwhelmed sound and he started pacing. Then it made Negan think about how he had no idea that Joel worked for Philip previously. “Well, most things.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” Y/N tried to move out to Joel to comfort him, placing her hand in over his shoulder letting out a gasp when Joel pulled away from her like her touch was fire.

“Don’t touch me,” Joel warned making Y/N stumble backwards, her eyes staring out at him with confusion when he ran his hand down the side of his face. “This is your fucking fault for guilting me into showing up at your party. I’m now looped into this fucking thing and I have nothing to do with your miserable fucking family.”

“I’m sorry,” Y/N apologized feeling guilty that this was happening in general, lowering her head.

“I knew I should have never fucking done this to begin with. All your family has ever done is fuck up my whole life. I should have known that starting something with you would have just landed me in a fucked-up position like this,” Joel continued to yell making Poppy stand up from where she was seated when he stepped in closer to Y/N. “I hate your whole fucking family and all you people have ever done is put me in shit my whole life.”

“Hey,” Poppy put a distance between Joel and Y/N, her hand placing in over the center of Joel’s chest to keep him back. “I know that you’re worried about your daughter and that’s okay, but I can’t imagine that Y/N had any kind of idea that this would happen. She has no idea the kind of person her father is. If she would have known your family could be at risk, I promise you that she would have never done something like this.”

“Don’t try to lecture me about someone that I’ve been around for almost two years,” Joel bickered with Poppy, his dark eyes locking with Y/N’s when she lifted her head up to stare out at him. “She spends and spends without a care in the world. She was so fucking arrogant that she thought she was good enough for a professor to pull her aside and think she was better than every other student. She had to know her father was a piece of shit, but she just kept on with life acting like it was no big deal. Spending her father’s money like it was fucking toilet paper when the rest of the world is suffering. That’s what the Blake family does. Spend endlessly and ruin other people’s lives.”

“I did it to piss my father off,” Y/N defended herself seeing the way that Joel rolled his eyes and started to pace again beside the Mustang leaving her with chest pain over the things that he was saying. “I spent the money on things that mattered. I helped people…”

“Oh, so that massive ass party tonight was to help people? Taking me on a trip to an expensive ass resort was for the better of the world?” Joel pushed further, the lines over his head growing deeper as he threw his hand up in the air to point out at Y/N. “You’re just a spoiled little rich kid that has no account for the real world.”

“The party was my last thing because my father was cutting me off completely once I got my degree,” she informed Joel seeing him smirk when his hands rest at his hips and she could see that Poppy desperately wanted to help but didn’t know how. “I’m the black sheep in the family. I don’t fit in and he’s disgusted with me wanting to go into what I am.”

“Oh boo fucking who,” Joel taunted her making a lump grow in her throat when Negan finished with his call and stepped in beside them.

“Okay, Rick is going to call me back when he has your family,” Negan claimed with a shrug of his shoulders nodding back toward the house. “I’m going to go check things out inside. Make sure everything is okay. Once I’m satisfied that the house is safe, I will bring you guys in. First…we have to ditch our phones. Just for safety reasons.”

“Jesus Christ,” Joel tossed his hands up in the air and shook his head. “I knew I should have never fucking come tonight.”

“Here,” Y/N handed Negan over her phone seeing him nod and give her an empathetic expression when he saw that her background photo was her with Joel taking a selfie where she was kissing his cheek. Poppy huffed when she handed over her phone to Negan. Waiting for Joel’s, Negan could see that Joel was thinking things out.

“Why do you get to keep your phone?” Joel questioned seeing the way that Negan’s head tipped to the side. “Why do all of us have to hand over our phones, but you get to keep yours?”

“Because mine isn’t under my name and after Rick calls me back about your family, I’m ditching mine too. I didn’t keep a phone under her father’s name like the rest of the dumb fucks that worked for her father,” Negan reasoned with Joel hearing the angered breath that fell from Joel’s lungs. Joel grabbed his phone and tossed it to Negan seeing the glare that Negan gave him when he almost dropped the phone. “Thank you.”

“Whatever,” Joel leaned back to rest against the Mustang and he could see that Y/N looked like she was on the verge of tears again. Negan handed Joel over one of the guns seeing the way that Joel stared down at the gun with a huff. “Why are you giving me this?”

“To keep everyone safe,” Negan remarked before heading back toward the safe house to go check things out for them.

“You know, I took you on that trip because I wanted to make you happy. You told me you hadn’t had a trip since Sarah was born other than that one trip you took on a cruise with the two of you and Tommy,” Y/N reminded Joel of what he had told her in the past when they were together. “I showered you with gifts and I gave you money because I love you, Joel. I just want you happy. That’s all I ever wanted.”

“You wanted someone to love you back,” Joel corrected her seeing the way her eyes were damp and he shook his head. “You knew I didn’t love you. You were just so desperate for the love of someone that you were willing to do anything to get it. You are looking from attention from an older man because of your piss poor relationship with your father and I became that guy. You wanted me to love you so bad and you were willing to put every cent you could to get it. You wanted to buy my love. That’s what you were doing.”

A loud swallow came from Y/N’s throat and Joel could see a single tear sliding down the side of her face, “And I let you do it because I fucking hated your family. If you weren’t you, I would have told you no because I don’t like people spending money on me. I’m not that kind of guy, but knowing the trash you came from…”

“Knock it off,” Poppy warned hearing the way that Y/N sniffled before walking off down the walkway that was toward the large body of water in the backyard. They could hear that she was crying and Poppy looked back over her shoulder with a sad breath. “I know you’re upset. I would be upset too, but she’s not like her dad. And she’s not the one that’s at fault for this. She was shot. It’s her birthday. Her father hates her. And she loved you. If she had to pick between you or her father before this, she would have picked you. She still would. You may not love her, but you’re being cruel. I understand the circumstances and if I didn’t, I swear I would be punching you in the dick right now but since things are the way they are I’m trying to be more understanding. I get it was a ploy the whole time for you, but it was real for her. You made her fall in love with you. So try to be a little bit nicer, eh?”

“Jesus Christ,” Joel scoffed looking out in the direction that Y/N went off. Thinking about what Poppy said to him, he sighed and went off after Y/N. Noticing that he was still holding the gun, he made sure that the safety was put on before placing his gun down the back of his pants. Seeing that Y/N was at the bottom of the backyard near the water sitting in the sand, Joel dropped down and took a seat next to her seeing that her face was tear stained. “You probably shouldn’t be getting sand in that wound.”

“Whatever,” she huffed staring out at the water and the silence was so loud that the only thing she could hear was the sound of the waves in the water. “I’ll probably be dead by the end of the night, so who gives a shit anyways?”

“You’re not going to be dead,” Joel hushed her with a shake of his head gazing back over his shoulder at the safe house seeing that Negan had started turning on the lights that were in the house. “We’re at your father’s safe house. No one is going to be able to find you here. They will figure out who is doing this and you will be fine in no time.”

“Yeah, okay,” she shook her head obviously not believing a word that Joel said and he sighed loudly. “I’m sorry I’ve put you in this position. You’re right. This is all my fault. I should have just realized that you didn’t love me. I was just so fucking stupid. You should be with your daughter right now instead of being with someone you fucking hate. I’m sorry I put you in this position.”

“Listen, I’m sorry for talking to you the way I am. I was upset originally with your father and I’m scared about Sarah,” Joel acknowledged with a frown, dropping his head when he caressed his hand over the back of his neck. “I’m an asshole. I know I am. I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologize for because nothing you are saying is wrong,” she shrugged her shoulders, reaching up to wipe at her eyes with the back of her hand. “There is certainly something wrong with me. My mother abandoned me and left me with my father who she knew was a piece of shit. My father hates me. No one really likes me for me. They just see my father when they look at me. And you’re right, I was arrogant. I really believed you when you told me that I was special. I just wanted to be special so fucking bad on my own. Not because of my father, but because of me. I tried so hard and worked as much as I could with my schooling that I thought I finally found something that was for me where I could break away from my father.”

“You are talented. If you keep working at it, you will do perfectly fine,” Joel commented seeing that she genuinely felt everything that she was saying about her father. “What I did was wrong Y/N. You aren’t your father. You were just a kid when he did it. I forgot that. You had no idea who I was because you had nothing to do with it.”

“You told me that you started realizing that you liked me along the way,” she thought back on what he told her before she ended up getting shot making him sigh loudly. “When?”

“On our trip,” Joel answered her, his jaw locking up when he gave her an honest answer. “Until then, I didn’t get to know the real you. I just saw the girl willing to do everything I wanted in order for her to be mine. I told you to jump and you asked how high. I was addicted to the feeling of having control over someone as powerful as you.”

“I’ve never had power in my life Joel. I’m probably one of the least powerful people out there. I’ve always been under someone’s thumb or say. I could never be who I truly wanted to be,” she confessed with a shuddering breath, considering the answer that he just gave her. “Our trip was for your birthday in September. We were together a whole year and a month before that. So for a year you pretended we had something together? And you felt nothing for me?”

“I don’t want to lie to you. I just saw my anger when I was with you. It was when we really got to spend time together when I saw the parts of you I didn’t know existed. That’s why I allowed us to start spending the nights together sometimes. I genuinely like you as a person Y/N, I do. Regardless of the shit I’ve mouth vomited over the last hour,” Joel declared making her let out an overwhelmed exhale while he stared out at her with a sadness in his eyes. “I really did talk to Sarah about you tonight because I care about you.”

“But you never loved me?” she confirmed making Joel let out a tense breath and shake his head making her breathe in sharply.

“If things would have gone different and we could have worked on us,” Joel began lifting his hands in the air trying to think out his words. “I really did like spending time together with you. You’re good company Y/N. And if we got to explore our relationship more and you weren’t…”

“Philip Blake’s daughter,” she finished for him making Joel’s lips part and he nodded slowly. “I never had a chance with you from the moment you learned that he was my father. Which really sucks because I really did love you.”

“I know,” Joel whispered hearing the sound of footsteps approaching and he swiftly turned around to see that it was Negan holding his hand out to show the cell phone. “What is it?”

“Your daughter,” Negan informed him making Joel scramble to his feet to grab the cell phone so he could talk to Sarah. Joel walked off in the distance and Negan could tell that Y/N was upset about everything that was happening. Kneeling down, Negan reached out to place his hand over her shoulder and he noticed that she was crying. “We gotta take care of that wound.”

“Of course,” she gave Negan a half-smile and allowed him to help pull her up from the ground. Wiping at her face she could only imagine how terrible she looked right now. Following Negan toward the house, she saw that Poppy was already waiting for them on the back deck watching Joel talking on his phone by the water. Poppy stepped forward to reach out for her friend and Y/N held her hand up to stop her. “I’m okay. Don’t worry about it.”

“I’m sorry babe,” Poppy commented following the two of them into the house where Negan led her into an office in the home. Negan made her sit down on one of the comfortable chairs that was there when he went for the medical kit that he had found when he was searching the house before allowing them in. Y/N saw in the distance a giant painted portrait of her father on the wall and she groaned out in disgust. “I can’t believe how you’ve handled being shot. You’re a goddamn champ love.”

“It just grazed me Poppy,” she winced when Negan started to clean her wound and his worried eyebrows bounced up to make sure she was okay. Giving him a nod, she bit back on the pain that she was feeling knowing that it burned like hell.

“Yeah, but you were bleeding a lot,” Poppy was dramatic in the way that she pronounced her words making Negan chuckle.

“I checked in with Simon who told me that they put your father in a secret location to keep him safe,” Negan educated her on what he learned when he was on the phone checking in with everyone and surveying the home alone. “He wasn’t hurt at all. They think someone who was trying to get to him was going after you to make a point.”

“This is all very ironic, isn’t it?” she couldn’t help but laugh in frustration, squeezing her eyes shut while Negan finished up with her wound and it hurt like hell but she didn’t want to show it. “My father doesn’t even love me and someone is trying to kill me to put it to him. My father would probably be thankful that they killed me. Then he doesn’t have to explain why I’m no longer part of the family when he lands governor.”

“Your dad wouldn’t want you dead,” Poppy sat on the edge of the chair that Y/N was in, reaching out to hook her arm loosely around Y/N’s shoulders being careful not to mess with the area that Negan was taking care of. “Regardless of how he feels about you, you’re still his daughter. His flesh and blood. No parent wants to see their child die before them.”

“Poppy, I don’t know who you are trying to fool here. My father wouldn’t give a shit if I died,” Y/N’s voice was broken when she thought about her father’s feelings toward her. “He’s confirmed that for me many times in the past. And it’s almost amusing to think there are people out there who think that by hurting me, they are hurting him. One person is trying to kill me and another broke my heart.”

The sound of the door pushing open was heard alerting everyone that Joel was standing there. By the look in his eyes it was obvious that he had heard what she said about having her heart broken. Guilt flooded into his features and no one said anything. This was something that Negan and Poppy really had no say in. And with Joel, he already told her how he felt.

“Thank you for finding someone to take care of my family,” Joel cleared his throat, finally stepping forward and holding the cell phone out for Negan to take. “I would rather be with them myself right now, but I understand you having us hang it out here until we know everything will be okay. It’s better to keep them safe.”

“You’re welcome,” Negan accepted the phone after finishing with the bandage on Y/N’s arm. It made her sigh and slide back into the chair while Negan gathered everything he used to clean it up. “There are some burner phones that we can use here. I will take one and I’ll give you one Joel. Just in case.”

With an understanding nod, Joel went over by the fire that Negan had set and stood by it to get warm after being outside near the chill of the water. Staring down at her feet, Y/N leaned forward and curled her fingers around the sides of the couch, “I’m not feeling very well. I think I’m going to go lay down for a few.”

“Are you okay?” Negan helped her stand up from the seat and she gave him a firm nod. Heading out of the room, she went for the stairs and found the first bedroom that she could.

Crawling into the center of the bed, she closed her eyes tightly and wished that this was all a dream she would just wake up from. Everything that was happening was something she would have come up with only in her nightmares. Someone was trying to kill her because of her father? The man she loved only used her to get to her father. Her life was shit and she knew that, but this topped the cake. And the sad thing? It was still in the final few minutes of her birthday and she was ending it broken.

The sound of a door pushing open was heard, but she didn’t move. She didn’t have the energy. So many times today she wanted to break and sob. Holding it in only made things worse. Part of her wondered if things would have been better if the shooter didn’t miss. It’s not like she felt like her life held any importance. Having Negan, Joel and Poppy here only put them at risk…and for what? It made her think maybe she should just go back home because it was a waste to put forth all this effort for nothing. And honestly? That’s what she felt like. Nothing.

Sighing as the bed dipped, she felt the delicate touch of arms wrapping around her to hug her from behind and she immediately knew it was Poppy. Allowing her friend to hold onto her, Y/N stayed quiet and just enjoyed being comforted by her friend. In her heart, she would have loved for it to be Joel, but she knew better. At least with Poppy she didn’t feel alone and she appreciated that.

----

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