#on the inside of Phil and Kristin’s rings

[ursulaincorporated]

Take some screenshots from my Kristin cosplays! She’s still not finished. I have the gun, of course, that still needs to be finished. I also want to make some sort of thing for her arm, since Wolfy said that since Wilbur doesn’t like to be touched, she tied something on her arm that he can grab onto. I think I wanna Philza-code it, just to have an element of him in the cosplay. Anyway, enjoy the cosplay!

[ax-y10]

I Overheard (That She Was Nineteen)

Chapter 1 (Next)

Meaning of the song:

A/n: I wrote this at 2am don't blame my sleepy ass brain. I'm going to try to get chapters out as quick as possible for everyone. This isn't the best of my writing, but don't blame my 2am brain.

Chapter info: Mentions of a harsh family (reader), Mentions of yelling, an alcoholic biological father, small detail of a poor biological family, hardly anything to worry about, lowercase intentional

Pronouns: Mainly You/Yours, mentions of They/Them

Playlist:

Masterlist: Series Masterlist:

---

you'd gone out for a while with a few of your friends, wanting to get out of your shitty family home for a bit, and catching a ride from one of your friends. little did you know that you would end up at a house in the snow and no way of finding yourself back at home.

you'd always struggled with your family. they never got along with you a and you never got along with them. they would blame you for things you never did and you would disappear for hours without them having a clue where you went. and doing this always meant you getting grounded for weeks on end, the easiest the punishments being used on a seemingly harmless doing. your dad was an alcoholic, always had been, and there was no way of changing his actions. your family was quite poor and you'd never had a problem with bullying, because you picked up work for a friend and gained your own money and bought your own things, so no one ever knew about the insides of your family.

and now you had found a rather tall man, a mop of curly brown hair stuck underneath a red beanie, chocolate brown eyes, a faded yellow sweater and a pair of black jeans. you could only guess he came from the family everyone in town talks about.

the sbi home. no one knew what ever happened there, but what was told, was always positive, leading people to believe they were a caring family. and that's what you thought at the moment.

the man had walked you to your home, dropped you off, and had invited you over to his family home for lunch the next day. but his experience wouldn't go unnoticed by his family at all.

"i overheard that they were nineteen. she's got a fake id and a nose ring," he'd spoke at the dinner table that night, and everyone seemed to agree that you were an absolutely amazing human being.

you'd arrived for lunch the next day, and who you assumed was the father opened the front door, holding his arm out behind him and letting you in. and this was the first glance you got inside the home.

it was fairly nice. the kitchen had an array of white and grey tiling throughout it, the living room had a wonderful beige carpet laid down and the dining room, in which you were currently standing, had a beautiful wooden floor. you couldn't help but relish in the coziness of this home.

over the period of lunch with the family, you'd learnt that the name of the man who had walked you home yesterday was william, or wilbur as he preferred. his younger brother who, on first glance, always wore a baseball tee, and had blonde hair in a similar style to wilbur's, was tommy, or theseus, as the eldest brother, techno, calls him. and techno, to you he was the nicest of the bunch. he had dusty pink hair, braided and perfected by his mother, or father, you didn't really know. he wore a cape and had an assortment of rings placed upon his fingers. techno was much more inviting to you than many of the others were. the fathers name was phil, or philza as his children called him. he had hair similar to techno's, just not as long, and more of a blonde. he wore a green and white striped bucket hat, and had a cape similar to techno's, but green. now you could see where techno got his sense of style from. and their mother, who's name you learnt was kristin from the brothers, wore a large, black hat, with a lace trimming. she wore a stunning black dress that fit her frame perfectly, and she looked like she was crafted from the heavens above. phil was a lucky man.

at the table, they had learnt that your family life was shitty, and was not the best for you. you had expressed this the best you could without getting emotional, only a few tears slipping down your face. the stories of the parents adopting one of tommy's friends, tubbo, or toby, was getting your hopes up far too high. but they'd decided that you would be a nice addition, as you got along really well with them, and had a sort of sibling connection with them already.

you were ecstatic to say the least, and phil had walked home with you to help pack your stuff and bring it back. the extent of your packing were a few necessities such as clothes, toiletries, and a few others. you wanted to leave as much behind as possible, as to not be reminded of such a time with your family, and you knew you would most likely be able to have more stuff there at the sbi home.

you unpacked fairly quickly, and learnt you had to share a room with techno, him having an extra bed and a larger space to fit two people. you were so delighted to find that out, already having the strongest bond with techno at this point in time. and it seemed he was happy as well. you'd already established territories with techno, and you'd brought a folding barrier so you could have privacy when doing stuff on your own.

and later on that night, everyone decided to throw a bit of smoke into the night to welcome you. they learnt more about you and you learnt plenty about them.

wilbur plays the guitar and is a musician at this point in time, tommy has a very close bond with tubbo, and has low blood pressure, and techno is an earlybird, which won't clash with either of your schedules.

and you got let in on a joke.

phil had sex with a samsung refrigerator and had his sons with it. wilbur had sex with a salmon and had a fox son named fundy, who you had yet to meet. and techno had voices who rattled his brain throughout everyday.

and as you fell asleep that night, techno having read his greek mythology book to lull you to sleep, you heard faint yelling, not sure in which tone.

[crimeboys]

relationship scramble?

this one’s basically a fleabag au with wilbur playing the role of fleabag. he and his best friend niki ran a bakery but like. six years prior wilbur left to try and become a politician and failed. badly. and ended up coming back but niki was already gone by then, tired of waiting for wilbur to come back bc he promised he would, at least to visit, but he got stuck in his own mind blah blah blah. she now works as like a campaign speech writer/consultant and wilbur is miserable and alone working at a bakery (his ass cannot bake) and has like no fucking money.

this also got too long so under the cut

the story starts at like a family lunch type deal. phil is in town for the first time in a while, he’s been traveling with his wife, kristin, who wilbur does not know that well and so does not fully trust. tubbo (wilbur's brother) and ranboo (tubbo's husband) are there as well, and technoblade (phil’s business partner/best friend who now 90% takes care of the company bc phil’s away), sally (wilbur’s ex-wife who he got pregnant at 16, subsequently had a baby with, and then they realized they were much better off friends but unfortunately they’d already had the marriage, the baby, and all of the subsequent disappointments. so they don’t really talk anymore. except for at family events or when wilbur is really, really drunk), fundy (wilbur’s 18 year old son wilbur hasn’t directly spoken to since wilbur tried to kill himself), and dream who is there as wilbur’s date but has been ignoring him to talk to technoblade. oh also michael is probably eating paste in the other room or something.

and a lot of shit happens but namely dream dumps wilbur for like the 100th time and tubbo offers wilbur money to keep his bakery afloat and wilbur lies to phil so so much and literally everyone knows he's lying except for phil.

the fic is crimeboys centric bc of who i am as a person and it’s basically like. tommy comes barging in demanding a job and wilbur at first is like “fuck no” but actually i’ll just post the scene keep in mind it's not edited blah blah blah

—-

“No, we’re not a new restaurant,” Wilbur says into the phone. Most calls are people asking that same question because of the name, Name Pending, that Wilbur and Niki thought was fucking hilarious six years ago. Now, Wilbur wants to ring their quirky little necks. “The name is just an inside joke. Yes, we’re open. Until 6pm. Because we’re a bakery, sir.”

The bell rings as the door opens. Wilbur doesn’t really need the bell because he can see with 100% clarity when people come in, but he and Niki thought it would add that touch of authenticity. As the customer continues to rant about wanting cookies at 7pm, a grimy-looking man walks in. Well, his skin isn’t grimy but his clothes are. Wilbur wonders how one can conceivably get that many stains on a shirt.

Wilbur hangs up the phone despite the customer still speaking and says, “Welcome in. What can I get for you today?”

“A job,” the man says. “If you’ve got one, I need a job. Badly.” Wilbur can afford to keep this place running maybe two months more.

“Well, I’m sorry but you’d probably have better luck-”

“No!” The man shouts, and Wilbur straightens up a bit in his shock. “No, no, no because that's what the lady at the supermarket said.”

“You got rejected by the lady at the supermarket?” They’ve got terrible turnover there. And thieves. This guy’s resume must be shit.

“Yeah, then I went to the bookstore, then the arcade, then the fucking thrift. All of them said, you’ll have better luck down the street!”

“Well,” Wilbur says with a shrug. “London.”

“Oh, fuck London.” Wilbur agrees. “Look, I really just- I just need a job, alright?”

“Yes, but I haven’t got one to give you.”

“Why not?”

“Well, I just prefer to work alone.” A lie. Wilbur misses the loud mornings of baking and music, crooning and dancing with Niki as they laughed, Wilbur always stealing at least one cookie per batch. Mornings with himself are loud in the bad way.

“Okay. I prefer having a job, personally,” the man slaps a paper on the counter. Wilbur bends over to skim it. Oh, nevermind, there are hardly 20 words. It would be hard to skim any more than that.

RESUME:

Name: Tommy Innit Prior Job: ONLY Man Ever Expected Pay: 200 dollars per hour

“Right,” Wilbur says. He folds his hands on the counter. “I’m not giving you 200 dollars an hour.”

“We can negotiate. 199.99 isn’t terrible.”

“You ever heard of minimum wage?”

“Ever heard of knowing your worth?” Wilbur’s eye twitches.

“What could you even bring to the table? You have any skills? Anything that would amount to earning 200 dollars an hour?” Tommy squints, like this question has never occurred to him.

“Work.”

“But what can you do?”

“Work.”

“If you can’t even answer a simple question-”

“Just tell me what to do, I’ll do it! I don’t care what it is.”

“Have you ever baked? Have you ever cleaned?” 

“I can figure it out!”

“Sorry, was that a no on the cleaning thing?” Looking at Tommy’s clothes, Wilbur would wager so.

“Just give me a chance!” Wilbur is not at the fucking place he can just give people chances right now. He’s going out of business, he just got dumped by Dream for the upteenth fucking time, and his little brother had the audacity to offer him money not 24 hours ago. He does not want to garner another fucking loss.

“Why won’t anyone hire you?” Tommy groans.

“Fuck’s it matter?”

“Color me curious.”

“Fuckin’- not a lot of places take ex-cons.” Well, that’s certainly something. That should probably make Wilbur’s choice even easier. But Tommy looks determined, Wilbur might be a little manic right now, and he’s tired of eating burnt fucking cinnamon rolls.

“Make a cookie and I’ll think about it.” Tommy blinks.

“What, seriously?”

“Yeah.”

“Like, right now?”

“You got any other job interviews?” Wilbur points a thumb to the actual kitchen. “Have at.” 

---

here are my notes for some of the relationships in this fic i didnt touch on too heavy uhh

quackity is a political consultant that wilbur has a very aggravating situationship with ← they just meet up a couple times a month to get drinks and piss each other off and then not have sex. this is both incredibly frustrating and also definitely part of it for both of them.

dream is wilbur’s “mutually beneficial” kind-of ex. when wilbur feels like he’s spiraling out of control, he tends to gravitate toward dream who is fine with it because he’s obsessed with control and also technoblade who he gets to hang out with if he’s “dating” wilbur. literally no one is actually sure whether they’re actually together when they’re going out but that’s fine, wilbur would die if he put any sort of label on any of his relationships, plus their trysts don’t last long and they have actually never been physically in a room alone together.

tubbo is wilbur's little brother who is married to ranboo and they have a kid, michael, and wilbur spends a lot of time being just a little bit bitter that his little brother is more successful than him but also tubbo is kind of erm. miserable he hates being a stay at home dad (he loves his son, he loves his husband, he misses Doing Things and shit) and the walls of his home feel more like a box and yeah. also tubbo offers wilbur money like right at the beginning of the story bc it’s Obvious the bakery is about to go under and wilbur is mad about that bc well. issues.

[k3rm1e]

hiihi !! ive been loving all the stuuf yoube been wirting latley its so good :^D i ws wondering if i ciuld have some hcs ,or just a onrshot either or i dont mind, of reader geeting sick and mumza nd dadza take care of them ?? bc i lovr mr and mrs minecraft <33 liek like reader like "ahh im finr mr minecraft" and they have 102° fever Nd have a runny nose and mr minecatft is liek "mmm no i dont thnik so m8" nd yaeh !! they/them pronouns but i thnk uve benn doing that arleady - :^) anon

sickly

hiihi !! ive been loving all the stuuf yoube been wirting latley its so good :^D i ws wondering if i ciuld have some hcs ,or just a onrshot either or i dont mind, of reader geeting sick and mumza nd dadza take care of them ?? bc i lovr mr and mrs minecraft <33 liek like reader like "ahh im finr mr minecraft" and they have 102° fever Nd have a runny nose and mr minecatft is liek "mmm no i dont thnik so m8" nd yaeh !! they/them pronouns but i thnk uve benn doing that arleady - :^) anon

:^) anon my beloved;;;;; i love your brain. this could go two ways depending on whether you’re staying with phil or if you guys are online so i went with your staying with him. i also did a one shot but if you want hcs i hv no problem writing some :) i hope this is good!

cw: cursing

mumza and dadza take care of you:

  it had finally happened. while covid wasn't fully over just yet, many had gotten the vaccine and conventions were opening up again. which meant two things: meetups and twitchcon. finally, you could meet some of your supporters and see your friends.

  “mom, are we almost there?” your mom was driving you to the airbnb you’d be staying at with a few of the other dream smp members. at first, you assumed you’d all be staying in separate hotel rooms. but, this way, you could spend more time with friends, save money, and your mom wouldn’t have to be with you the whole time. there had already been many long conversations between philza and your mom to make sure you’d be safe staying with everyone.

  “yes, sweetie. almost there. we’re just two minutes closter than when you asked earlier.” ok, sue you, maybe you were a bit excited. but really, who could blame you? making in person friends had never been easiest, so the majority of your friendship were with people online. not being able to see or meet anyone for so long had been excruciatingly painful. 

  within ten minutes, you had finally arrived at the airbnb. quickly jumping out you ran to the door, obnoxiously ringing the doorbell. through the door, you heard an accented voice yell out, “i’m coming, i’m coming!”. at this point you were springing up and down on your tippy-toes, ready to spring out of your skin.

  the door opened and you were greeted by a very tired and annoyed looking wilbur, “hello?”.

`   “WILBURRRR!!!” you were screaming in his face (unintentionally), waking him up from his drowsiness. you launched yourself in his arms, not paying attention to your mother’s bewildered expression. you quickly let go of him and shoved past him, “i’m gonna go say hi to everyone!” distantly you heard wilbur begin to talk to your mother, explaining what you guys were doing.

  while running around you said hi to tommy, tubbo, ranboo, eret, fundy, niki, techno, phil and kristin. the others were either staying in another airbnb or in their own hotel rooms. after about thirty minutes, wilbur had finally stopped talking to your mom.

  “yes, ma’am. i can promise you they’ll be completely safe. you have absolutely nothing to worry about.” wilbur was calmly talking with your mother, looking more and more tired by the minute.

  “alright. thank you.” your mother called you over. “come give me a hug and say bye!” slowly dragging your limbs over, you let her hug you. behind you you could hear wilbur and phil laughing at you.

  “bye mom…” she was holding onto you tightly, petting down your hair.

  “oh, sweetie, i love you so much. i’m so happy you found something you're passionate about and made so many lovely friends while doing so.” as much as you loved your mom, the small snickers behind you were getting quite embarrassing. you could hear that tommy had joined in on the laughing. 

  “... i love you too, mom. can you let go now?” you tried pulling back, but all she did was pull you closer.

  “oh, but i just don’t wanna let you go. i love you so much, you know that right?”

  “i know, mom. i love you too. but you’ve gotta get home and i have to unpack and get ready for meeting with fans tomorrow.” you finally got her to pull away, “i love you mom, okay? thank you for letting me do this.”

  “oh, i love you too, sweetie.” and with that, your mom left. after watching her pull out of the driveway and down the street, you whipped around.

  “not. a. single. word.” you stared dead in the boy’s eyes, seeing just how much wilbur was about to burst out laughing.

  “what? personally, i think it’s very sweet.” tommy was smiling, purposely pissing you off. “so sweet, how much your mom loves you.”

  “shut your fucking mouth, tommy.” you stared deadpan at him and began walking inside and over to the kitchen.

  “what? i didn’t say anything wrong! i was just simply commenting on your very, very sweet relationship with your mother.”

  kristin moved forward to talk to you, “for what it’s worth, i do thing you hae a very sweet relationship with your mom.”

  “thank you. you’re the only good one in this house, kristin minecraft.” with that she laughed, and you all continued on with your evening. after staying up late watching old youtube videos, you all went to bed. in the morning you would have your first day of three at twitchcon, meeting fans and other creators alike. 

  for around 10 hours, you stood in booths signing fanart, prints, notebooks, and the like. meeting so many different people was eye opening, just learning who supported you. at the end of the day everyone went to a restaurant to eat dinner after so long.

  “this food… is so… fucking good.”

  “agreed.” you and the rest of the so-called ‘bench trio’ were eating at what wilbur had deemed the ‘kiddy table’. after eating so much food you were all tired. the rest of your friends had already left, walking back to the airbnb. when it was finally time to leave the restaurant, it was pouring rain.

  “WHY IS THE RAIN SO COLD IT’S LITERALLY SUMMER”

  after running home you had gone to sleep while the others had changed and taken showers. after sleeping for around ten hours, you had finally woken up. frankly, you felt like dogshit. you could barely breathe out of your stuffy nose and your head felt like it had been shoved full of wet cotton balls.

  instead of staying in bed, you got up and tried to get ready. on the way downstairs to get food and see who was making so much noise, you fell face first down the stairs. “owwwww…”

  hearing a ruckus, phil and kristin left the kitchen, where they were making pancakes. “holy shit! are you alright, mate?”

  pushing phil over, kristin walked over to you, “obviously they’re not okay phil! the poor kid is lying on the floor.”

  slowly getting up, you try to reassure both of them that you’re okay. “no, no, no, don’t worry. i am perfectly okay.” while you don’t know exactly how you sound, based on the expression on phil’s face, you don't think you sound very good.

  “uh, yeah, how about no. you sound like you’ve draken a whale bottle of vodka.” phil walked over to you and grabbed you by the arm, trying to hold you up.

  “i’m fineeee”

  “no, your fucking not. you’re burning up.” phil looked at you, angrily. “you need to go to bed.”

  “but i don’t wannaaaaa. i feel fineeee.” you felt like crying, for absolutely no reason. with that, you passed out on the floor.

  phil and kristin somehow managed to get you back up the stairs and into bed. once you were safely in your room, with no risk of cracking your skull open, phil took your temperature. “mate, your temperature is at nearly 102°. you’re lucky i don’t take you to a hospital.” he started at you, disapprovingly.

  “i’m sorryyyyy dadza. are you mad at me?” in your deluded state you pouted at him, like a child.

  “no, i’m not mad at you. just disappointed. you should’ve known not to do that. you’re old enough to know when you’re sick.” he stared at you with a disapproving look.

  “but that’s even worseeeeee” you felt like balling your eyes out. out of embarrassment, you tried to hide under your blanket. “can you tell mumza i’m sorry for worrying her?”

  above you, you heard phil laugh. “it’s not that big a deal, kid. i’m just upset. you could’ve seriously hurt yourself. i was worried.”

  “you were worried about me? awwwww, i love you too dadza.” you moved your head out of the blankets, smiling at him with dried tears and sweat on your face.

  “yeah, yeah. now shut up and go to bed.”

  kristin walked in, hearing what he said. “phil, don’t bully the kid. they already feel like shit.” out of the corner of your eye, you saw her look over to phil and smile at him.

  “i’m not doing anything, swear on my life!” he put his hands up in defense of himself, making you laugh.

  turning away from him, she directed her next question towards you. “how you feeling, kid? took quite a tumble there.” she smiled at you and ushed your hair out of your face.

  “i’m sorry for worrying youuuuuu. i love you, mumza. promise.”

  laughing, she leaned down to kiss you on the head. “love you too, kid. now, want me to sit with you and we can all watch some netflix or something?”

  you silently nodded and the two of them joined you on the bed, not caring very much if they got sick. after not even an hour, you all passed out.

  a few hours later, everyone returned back from the convention. let’s just say wilbur now had some very valuable blackmail.

hope you like it! this was so wholesome i- wfowcsjvri

i want parents like dadza and mumza now

[random-tinies]

Crowza - 1

I’ve had this AU idea sitting in my brain for a while and I’m going to turn it into a full-on fanfiction series. I’ll be tagging it as Crowza AU Here is Chapter 1 💙 No trigger warnings for this one. ^^ just good fluff. ft. Mumza as Lady Death, 1.6k words

Previous (N/A) | Next

. .

There truly is no proper comparison to flying. Sure you can describe the feeling, you can say it's like swimming in freedom, but it will never compare to actually flying.

Philza thinks about this as he soars through the air, wind blowing through his primary feathers. Occasionally he flaps, defying the gravity that tries to pull him back down to earth. He takes a breath of fresh air, relishing the way it chills his lungs. If it weren't for his cloak and his feathers, he would be quite cold this high above the ground. Especially in early spring.

Although it's early April, occasional drifts of snow still dot the landscape below him as the birdman flies north for the summer. Twice a year, he makes this migration, and although it may be warmer in the southern areas, Phil enjoys the northern pine forest he calls his summer home. It's special to him for three reasons.

Kristin, his home, and his boys.

First things first, however. He needs to stop by his cache and see if it had been raided by squirrels while he was gone. Or if anything fresh is caught in his traps. Nasty buggers, always giving him grief. Troublesome creatures. Phil banks left and dives down towards a thick old oak tree with winding and twisted branches. He lands on one, bird feet gripping with sharp claws, and hops down to where his stash should be.

Near the center of the tree, the branches arch and wind themselves together in such a way that it forms the perfect shelter for someone his size. It had taken him a good century to help the young tree grow in such a way, but it gives him the perfect shelter year after year so every painstaking day of tying young branches was worth it.

Phil looks around to make sure he's not being watched before hopping inside. One can never be too careful when your cache is involved. His wings fold behind him as he walks forward, ducks under a large branch, and enters his storage room. A quick scan confirms that nothing found his home this winter and he relaxes, breathing a sigh of relief and grabbing some squirrel jerky to munch on.

It had been a long flight and he wants nothing more than to just flop on his bed and take a short nap, but he has two homes to visit first. His wings seem to ache in protest but he steps back outside and takes off into the sky once more.

A few strong flaps put him in the air and he soars the short distance it takes to get to his boys' cabin. He can see it from the top of his tree, it is an easy flight. He notices the youngest of the three outside chopping firewood and decides to land on the roof some ways above him. The sky is overcast enough that his silhouette looks just like a rather large crow.

The movement catches the boy's eye and he looks up, putting a gloved hand up to his face to try and shield his eyes from the bright white cloudshine. He squints and yells up at what he assumes is the same bird he's been seeing for years now, "Oi! Good to see you! Took your sweet time this year!"

Phil shuffles his wings and scoffs quietly. He's right on time. He always shows up to his Lady's forest on the same day every year. He watches his boy fondly as he continues to talk to himself, quieter now as he hefts the axe to chop another log in half. "Y'know, Wilbur thinks you're a crow but I think you're too big to be a crow. Plus I don't think crows can live as long as you have."

Phil sits down on the peak of the roof, legs still under him in case he needs a speedy escape. He listens to the peaceful sounds of a quiet life. A cold chill on the breeze, shadows crossing the ground as clouds moved through the sky, the occasional birdsong reaching their ears, the thunk of the axe as it chops through the wood.

The door to the cabin opens and Phil tenses, ready to fly off if attention is directed to him. He’s a little close to it and it could be a risk if whoever steps out decides to look up at him. While he loves these boys, if they find out he isn’t a crow then he’d never be able to return and watch them again.

A tall brunette steps out and calls to the blonde, “Hey, Tommy, when you’re done out here, could you come inside? Techno got a letter and we need to discuss it together, as a family.”

Tommy nods and sets down the axe. He nods towards the roof. “Hey, Wilbur, your crow friend is back. Silent as always.”

Whelp! Time to get out of there! Phil immediately takes off, flapping hard and flying over the boys’ heads. His silhouette is even harder to recognize as anything other than a crow as he soared away. Wilbur says, “Oh yeah, there it is, just like every year. You reckon he likes us?”

Whatever Tommy replies, Phil doesn’t hear it. He’s too far away, heading towards where Kristin lives in the forest. The landscape below him becomes denser and darker, the pines twisting and behaving oddly. Branches bend lower and often twist together. Crow caws are more frequent and a few join him as he flies towards his destination.

“Dadza!”

“Philza! It’s been so long!”

“Return of Dadza! Dadza! We missed you!”

Phil chuckles, striking up casual conversation with them, telling them stories of his travels. He does this every year when he returns from migration. Some of the murder follow him south during the winter but let him visit his boys alone. They prefer to stay with their lady, and Phil doesn’t blame them. He’d stay with her all the time if he was allowed.

At last they reach Kristin’s home. The murder descends and a few part ways to fly in through the open window. Phil smiles as he lands on a doormat that reads “On Death’s Door” and chuckles at the inside joke as he uses the tiny knocker built at the bottom just for him. The door opens and the most beautiful woman in all of history looks down at him with a fond smile. “And who would this be, knocking at my door?”

She wears a long black dress that graces her curves breathtakingly. Dark brown hair flows off her shoulders like a waterfall of shadows. Her voice is like the sound of windchimes in a gentle breeze, enveloping Phil in its peace. Even if his feet are rooted to the ground, his heart soars with joy. She is his everything and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Phil takes his hat off and bows to her, wings spread. When he looks up, she leans down and extends a hand towards him to step up onto. “You know I’d never miss an opportunity to have a brush with Death.”

His grin widens as she gives him a withering look. “You’ve said the same joke for the last five decades.”

“And you’ve said the same response for the last four decades.”

He laughs and balances himself as she lifts her hand. He bows his head as she presses a kiss to the top of his head, blush dusting his cheeks. The kiss of Death, if you will. Even if they’ve been together for forever, he’ll never get over these little moments. Coming back from his winter migration is his favorite part of the year.

Phil’s feathers ruffle and he places his hat back on his head. Nobody can make him feel as light as she can. She strokes his feathers and asks him about his flight, letting him perch on her hand. He tells her about the herd of deer he passed who had two fawns among them and the pack of wolves he heard while roosting one night.

She listens attentively to his words and pours him a small cup of tea. Phil could never express his love for her in the right way but he knows she understands. Their mob settles around them and drinks in every word, occasionally adding their own and squabbling amongst themselves. This is his family as much as his boys in their cabin are. He feels peace, drinking the bittersweet tea in his tiny cup. 

A younger crow hops up and leans against Phil and preens his wings.

“Mumza! Mumza and Dadza!”

“Puppies! We love to see it!”

“Can we go visit them? I want to hear them!”

“Shiny ring… Phil, what about your boys?”

Phil hums and Kristin snaps her fingers. “I almost forgot! I meant to warn you, but the air is different this year. I’m not quite sure what’s going on, but I’ve felt more death in these areas than before. A few of my crows have gone missing.” She pets down his back, smoothing his feathers. “Be careful. I don’t want you to be among them, okay?”

He gives her his best reassuring smile and says, “You know me, Kristin. I never let anything happen to me. How many years have I managed to escape death?”

She chuckles. “Many times, though there have been some close calls. Just watch out. There are fates worse than death, my love.”

He bows his head. “Of course, my lady. I’ll keep an eye out.”

The rest of the night goes smoothly. New crows that followed Phil there introduce themselves to Lady Death and join their flock. By the time the fire in the fireplace dies down, the two are fast asleep in her bed, snuggled together and dreaming of a happy future.

[dsmpkincalling]

Lowkey a lil nervous to do this lol-

Hi!! I’m a c!Karl kin, a c!Philza kin and a Ghostbur kin!! (That’s also kinsidering wilbur so ha h a -) Three in one? I think so!!

I’m honestly down to talk to anyone. Yknow, make some friends. Maybe find a canonmate or two, and just meet new folk + have a good time! I’d really like to see Q, Sap, Eret, anyone from TFTSMP, or any of my boys again (Toms, Wil, and Techno), but again, anyones welcome to come and talk!!

I am a minor (I’ll be 17 in June), and would prefer it if peeps that are bodily 15+ interact with me!! Alright , some memories that I can recall. I unfortunately don’t have many as Ghostbur lol.

As Karl;

- I was engaged to Quackity and Sapnap, Eret and I were ex-lovers (not fiancés)

- I was 5’11 height-wise

- I wasn’t losing my memories, but moreso they were really heavily suppressed (or I’d the right word repressed? Theyd peak out once or twice very slightly like once-in-a-blue-moon wise, but not commonly. They’d be repressed again after a few minutes.

- I remember walking into the kitchen me evening while Quackity was making dinner, and he *and* Sapnap were there, preparing or cooking the food together. Q noticed me, and brought me toward the counter, inviting me to cook alongside him and Sap. The nether-born was chopping carrots, and Quackity was on potatoes. I washed my hands, i was handed me a knife and some.. either lettuce or cilantro? I think, anywho — and I started cooking/prepping with those two. I don’t have any other remember what happened after that.

- This one time, Eret led me up to a certain part of his castle. It was a little ways up off of the ground, and there was a corridor that lead to another room across from where we were. There was a floor, a ceiling, and glass panes on the sides that showed the outside. The view looked nice, from what I could recall. Everyone and everything looked smaller from up there! As we got to the room, Eret opened the door, and inside was a bunch of jewelry. Bracelets, necklace’s, headdresses, rings — you name it! I think Eret said something like “let’s bedazzle you” or something like that. She then proceeded to sit me down in a (relatively comfortable) chair, and place all sorts of jewelry on me. Everything was so pretty, and we were definitely joking around too. Soft kisses on the back of my hand too when he put a few rings on.

As Phil;

- I’d say I was at about 6’3 or 6’2 height wise.

- From what I can recall, all three of my kids were adopted. Wil and Techno were fraternal twins. I can’t remember where I found them. Tommy, I remember carrying him to my home sometime in the fall/winter from a forest. Poor kid was shivering and clinging to me. Kristin was waiting for me near the house, and as I approached the building, a younger Techno and Wilbur opened the door to let us in.

- I remember taking my sons (Techno, Wil, and Tommy) out apple picking one day when they all were kids. I took them there by boat, they rode in the back as I sat up front. Tommy was very ecstatic, and so was Wilbur, though he tried to downplay it. Techno pointed out Wil’s downplay of his emotions, to which he told the pinkette to shut up. When we arrived, Tommy happily jumped out of the boat and over to apple trees. Wilbur followed after Tommy, a smile on his face. Techno got out of the boat and waited for me as I got out. I noticed that Tommy and Wilbur forgot to grab a basket, and called them back to retrieve them. Almost immediately , they both ran back to grab baskets.

- And many chaotic memories that have to do with boats. Oh my stars lmao.

If you’re interested in communicating with me, I’m @thekarlkin on Tumblr and 🏵Strawberry Blond🏵#8105 on Discord!!

@thekarlkin

Strawberry Blond🏵#8105

!

[fyreb1rd]

Write it!!! even if its just a small draft you should write it down so you can expand on it later!!!! you might forget abt it if you dont write it down right now!!!! GO VIVI GO!!! -Cyber

cyber said it so ur getting a bullet point list, but it’s actually pretty long so —

Phil was a mortal adventurer in some (currently unnamed) kingdom, and one day he’s just called up to the castle by the king. The king offered him a high position in the castles court if he could save his daughter (aka the princess) from a loosely termed ‘cult’ that had kidnapped her to use as bait for the enderdragon

Phil, being Phil, was like “sure m8” and took on the quest having little to no information about this cult,,, and then realizes he shouldn’t atleast asked for a starting point. But he’s resourceful and manages to speak to various different people in the kingdom until he had some ideas about the cult, and where they may be.

He ends up running into Eret and Foolish as they’re wiping out a group of the cult and the three stop at a river to wash off the blood and Phil helps to heal them with potions while they explain that the cult had planned to use trained withers to kill the enderdragon, but they were struggling to train the withers, and causing mass destruction. The princess told them to knock it off, and actually killed one of their withers by herself (which no one had done up until that point) which was why they’d captured her

Foolish says she’s a spitfire girl, and she’ll probably not accept Phil’s help but she seems to be getting weaker after being kidnapped. Phil’s like “o shit respect” and bids farewell to Eret and Foolish at a tavern that night and hunts off in the direction of the stronghold. Now his plan is to wait out the group at the stronghold and stop them from going inside the portal room.

He mostly succeeds in this plan, but takes a pretty bad hit to his hip and they manage to get past him and they shove their way into the portal. He quickly follows after them, now just worried they’ll kill the dragon (because it was the hatchling, since Phil killed the original dragon, which was why the king wanted him to help— I feel like I should’ve clarified that earlier??)

He manages to kill most of the cultists until out of fucking no where this random girl slams the remaining three off the end island. Phil’s fucking amazed because this woman has wings which aren’t common at all. The two introduce themselves to one another and Phil finally learns the name of the girl he’s been chasing down, Kristin.

They go back to the kingdom after healing themselves and the hatchling, and Kristen hides her wings under a cloak. She explains that she got the wings “from the void itself” and because Phil really doesn’t want this random ass girl to stab him or something, he just agrees with her. When they return to the kingdom, which isn’t too far from the portal, everyone’s so excited their beloved princess is back.

The king keeps his word and Phil becomes a pretty high up officer in the nations army. The next couple of years goes smooth, and he keeps ranking up, until he’s asked to take over the small kingdom. He asks Kristin if she’s okay with it, considering she’s the technical heir, but she encourages him to take it. So he becomes a king.

During this time, he and Kristin do end up getting married because obviously I need my tiny bird man and his giant death goddess wife.

When Phil and Kristen are around their forties, Kristin falls ill with some unknown illness. She asks to go to the end one more time, so Phil takes her, and she holds his hands as she stares into the void until she passes. Obviously, Phil’s distraught bc his wife of a few decades just DIED but I swear that’s not the end

So the void likes Kristin so much, since she nursed the hatchling dragon back to health, it makes Kristin a goddess. And since, in my headcanon, the void is connected to death, she becomes the goddess of death. She finds Phil back on the same island where she died, now having a new physical form, and they let her body fall into the void to sort of hide the fact she’s now immortal.

Kristin decides Phil’s joining her on this life mission too, and grants him wings to be her Angel, and now he’s like Demi-immortal or however you wanna phrase it

They return to the kingdom, and continue ruling for a few more years before Phil comes across an illegal fighting ring and the champion fighter; a piglin hybrid simply dubbed The Blood God. He approaches Techno after the fight, and the two actually slowly become friends until a major war suddenly hits the kingdom.

Kristin is more concerned about protecting the nation itself, so she decides with Phil that they should enter the war defensively. They fight the war that way for years, until Phil and Techno meet again and Techno asks Phil just to take a run into the fight with him. The two go into a battle and wipe the battle field, both having been fighting for a long time solo.

Rumors soon begin to spread of the “Angel of Death” and the “Blood God” ruthlessly tearing up the enemy lines, and soligers begin engraving wings into their armor and panting them black for good luck (or doing golden crowns for strength)

The war ends only a year after the nation switches to being offensive instead of defensive and they end up wiping out major numbers of kings, emperors, presidents, queens, etc. to take their land

Thus, the Antarctic Empire is born with Phil as the emporer, Kristin as the Empress, and Techno as one the general of the whole army. It’s generally peaceful because no one really fucks with the empire, and during this era both Wilbur and Tommy are born and start to grow up.

When Wilbur is thirteen, he goes on his first solo mission and founds New Foundland. He lives there with Tommy for a few years, just to humble the boy and teach him how to fend for himself in the wilderness as a just in case.

During this time, the castle is seized, and Phil is killed by a group who wanted to overthrow the kingdom. Techno sends some of the guard to go and grab Wilbur and Tommy while Kristin tried to revive Phil. It ends up working, as he’s destined to not die until Kristin deems it’s his time to go.

The family lived all together for a few more years, this time with the addition of Tubbo.

Oh, how did Tubbo get here you ask? His kingdom, where he lived with his father in an End city, killed his dad and kidnapped him as a sacrifice for Techno. Obviously, that’s a lot to unpack, so they commonly say Tommy just found Tubbo one day while out exploring.

When Wilbur is thirty three, Tommy is sixteen, and Tubbo is fifteen they all leave to go visit a new continent that had been discovered (The Dream SMP) and they form L’Manburg after mistreatment from Dream. That’s where the story begins.

I missed explaining the magical aspects of this AU but hey, backstory is fun too :)