#on one hand it might make things easier
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so....i'm writing this vampire viktor idea into an actual fic and i would love to hear your thoughts on this:
#i'm writing it now and i have trouble deciding if modern technology should be involved or not.#on one hand it might make things easier#but also........it being set in like late 1800s or early 1900s is also a....tasty concept#not that i really know anything about history#but you know#it would be cool to put him in a fun little edwardian outfit#but i also king of would like to use modern technology#idk#thoughts?#vampire viktor#fic talk
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10 years later
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#yuji itadori#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#itafushi#itafushikugi#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#least heterosexual group photo ive ever drawn tbh#u have the kings of subtle pda and their judgy lesbian third wheel#this does remind me a lot of the kind of art i used to do jhgdjghdfj#specifically that one furuba main trio piece i did forever ago. same vibe better art#anyway......i tried my best........ i tried so hard#i do not know how old they look . the goal was 25/26 but atp i've gaslit myself into thinking they look the same#especially megumi im so . throws hands in the air in defeat#but idk what else i can do cries at least i like it??? i think???????#i don't know!!! if they look younger than 25 whatever!!!!!!!!#why is it so hard fr me to make chars look older im gna slam my head against the door#maybe its fine. idc <- (lie)#in other news itfs are married fight me abt it . yuuji rockin the right hand ring fr Lack Of Finger reasons#also i am Eating nobara's fit . she might also look a bit younger than intended the more i look at her gDI why cant i have nice things#new hairstyle carrying tbh. i think she would a. grow it out and b. switch the side she parts it on to make Seeing easier#god just take it all tht really matters 2 me is low pony nobara and Rings On Fingers itfs#i did my time in yoi i know how to make wedding bands Work
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Tumblrinas: Thanks for letting me know
Reposters: Hater!
Me:
#I'm such a hater I let this thing run on autopilot and didn't see one of their posts for almost 2 weeks lmao#the queue ran out last night#I'm back now#I just learned most of this blog is me ranting about how much I hate it lol ok#it's ALMOST like I keep saying this is about us and not them#I know reading comprehension on this site is piss on the poor but it might be worse on Facebook#keep shouting me out cause if any fb people actually look up this blog someone's gonna look extra dumb#im gonna compile the reactions asap I swear it#I was going to make a picture but I realized I can just type them out in a post bc that's easier smh#captain to all hands
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/dfec093d13c323b16ce8cc4a7c1ca369/208b1250ec1059cf-e5/s540x810/c1e40ab34e4b31fc1927d84814cf5bf6eeafb119.jpg)
And music born of murmuring sound / Shall pass into her face
sketch of ‘The Echo’ by Julia Margaret Cameron, photograph, c. 1868
original under read more
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#bluevelvt art#trying to sketch for myself again and might as well try to start with studies of pieces#the hand was so yaoi at first it was bad#gonna try to do isle of the dead like the one that appears in signalis in chalk pastels#cause puppy needs to practice different medium before just drawing anakin a lot#gotta figure out how to do the best digitally too woof#idk got a drawing stand just to prop my sketchbook up on a la drawing horse thing#makes it way easier to sketch and to avoid issues with warped perspective#julia margaret cameron#art history
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Act 1-2 isat au Aris battle icons are done babey! This was hell to draw!!!
#keese draws#eternal gales#oc art#oc#ocs#not main tagging this one cause I’m a coward + I’ll probably end up reposting this if I finish all the portraits#but I still did spend like 4 hours on these so I shall still be posting them in hopes someone enjoys them#I definitely got lazy with the effects but I’ll excuse myself for it since even if I tried I wouldn’t be able to emulate the real deal#I Could have hunted down some effect brushes to make it look a smidge closer but I’m lazy so.#also ignore all the other mistakes I made I drew most of these late last night#one thing I will say abt doing these is that I’m getting more and more tempted to actually try drawing five fingered hands#I’ve gotten better at drawing hands over the years but I think it’d be a lot easier if knew how to draw like. actual hands.#so idk might fuck around with that a bit in my own artstyle
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B'Elanna in 'Maneuvers'
#SHE WAS SO GOOD IN THIS ONE <3#I was rooting so bad for her when she was trying to convince Janeway to go easier on Chakotay#she cares so much about her friends <3#speaking of...Seska was her BEST friend?????#You can tell they didn't give a FUCK about women bc Seska & B'Elanna's apparently strong friendship like literally never comes up#all in all Seska is a really wasted character =_= her writing is so 'men did this' ... like c'mon.#but anyway back to B'Elanna - she literally sounds like she's about to cry as she tries to convince Janeway not to abandon Chakotay#& I was like 'O H HONEY!!!!!'#It makes me think B'Elanna might be the type of person who cries when she gets mad enough (and she hates it)#star trek screenshots#I like her lil berries & cream cut better than the long bob she has in later seasons#curly hair is my favorite obviously but there's a charm to this one I think!#IMPORTANT things to (me): Tuvok's little hand vein & B'Elanna's little mole <3#B'Elanna Torres
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#if i said Bodybag was a timelooper Max song would anyone else see my Vision jsjdbdhdg#it's like. it's kind of the same vibe as Cornflower Blue but a little more conflicted#like obvs there's the ''put you in a bodybag instead of my bed'' but also#''i don't wanna like you; i just wanna tie you up; and keep you in a cage and watch you sleep for ages'' 👀#ouughghg. it's about the desperation. it's about the wondering if things might be just the slightest bit easier w/o such strong feelings.#it's about the 'we're so beyond fucked up but i'll keep you safe. even if it hurts us both. even if it makes things worse.'#it's about the doomed yuri babeyyy#also. ''my heart is melting; and my hands are weak“ + ”i could cry when i hear you speak; but that just makes me angry''#i love. to think about how absolutely messed the hell up pricefield would get in a timeloop context. they have problems your honor <3#and even tho only one of them remembers the problems they still build up and get a little worse every time <3 <3#tfw you and your homoerotic bestie are irreparably tangled in and tied together with horrific amounts of karmic thread <3 <3 <3#sorry. unhinged au thoughts over. for now#nebular.txt#marrow max tag
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i love how knitting patterns have super detailed and exact instructions on what to use etc etc and every time i look at one im like. what if i....didn't exactly do that? and just kinda fucked with your instructions a bit hm?
#personal tag#i know thats the joy of creating etc#everything is guidelines. there's no rules. i can do whatever i want#i just also need to be okay with things not turning out how i'd want them then lmao#anyway i have set my eyes on THREE new projects#two cardigans; one for me n one for my sister#and then i might also try my hand. at SOCKS#sister is paying me for my time i will put into making her cardigan by getting me yarn for me#and i got this super soft one that i see people use a lot for crocheting plushies#but i dont understand crochet. maybe i can give it a try with this yarn again since its not like. a bunch of strands together#its like one string so that might make crocheting easier to understand#ANYWAY. cardigans and socks. moving up into the world#im also repairing my relationship to this first cardigan i made#she's not perfect but nobody is. i still hate the huge sleeve on one side but i refuse to take it apart to make a smaller one like the othe#so i just gotta live with it#she's warm and big and i poured a lot of hours into it and she does look cute!#anyway knitting. i like it. have begun a little knitting journal to keep track of my comments on patterns#organized every free pattern ive downloaded on a whim too#👍
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Even in food service, there is the demand for exponential growth. Each store has a profit target you're expected to hit every quarter. Each quarter the target gets bigger and bigger. The only way to make sure you hit or exceed that target is to increase sales or cut costs. Sales can only go so far though, so at a certain point there is the understandable temptation (not justifiable, but understandable) for your manager to start cutting hours. Once they do, your location has entered a Death Spiral.
The thing about the Death Spiral is it is nearly impossible to escape. It starts innocuous enough, with a few hours getting shaved off every week. And true enough at first you probably didn't need those hours. They were the slack, the extra hands that helped distribute the work and made it easier on everyone. You might not even notice they're gone. Maybe the morning rush is a little harder to handle, maybe there isn't as much time to chat as there used to be. But on the whole nothing has changed. You're still hitting your sales quota and, hey, everyone seems to be working a little harder. That's good, right?
Then the next quarter rolls around. You exceeded your quota. Upper management is very excited. But now your new quota is even higher than it would have been if you had simply performed to expectations. You raise prices a bit, push more expensive drinks, and sure, cut a few more hours. Bit by bit the slack gets tighter. The fat gets trimmed. All because continual growth, continual improvement, is not just demanded, but expected.
The endgame of the Death Spiral is the expectation that every worker will operate at 100% efficacy 100% of of the time, and that nothing will go wrong ever. It never reaches this point, as any food service worker will tell you, shit goes wrong. Service gets worse, you lose a few customers, and you miss your quota. This is the point of no return, because the only way to solve the problem is to add more hours. But there's no way upper management will approve spending more money. On a failing store? Don't be ridiculous. Maybe get those numbers up and we'll consider adding hours back. But the only way to get those numbers up is with no hours. It's a Catch-22. You're trapped. Slowly, inevitably, the store fails, and then closes.
The Death Spiral is a doomed strategy, but it is the one corporations push in response to investor pressure. It tricks workers into more work for the promise of relief later, if they do well and succeed, not realizing they'll only be asked to do even more next time. So how do you fight it? Know your worth. Don't let anyone give you more work without some kind of kickback. Don't fool yourself into thinking that being indispensable will lead to a reward later.
But the best defense? Join a union.
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damnnn that manga about making manga got me acting funny (making 5 year plans)
#feverishly outlining a self work schedule i know damn well i would never be able to maintain#literally have never been this motivated about my future and i didnt even particularly like the manga lol (tbf it's vol 1)#that and the trip to my public library are making me go ouh if i think out a rigid schedule enough then maybe#i will simply no longer get burnt out ever#look it's not the most realistic and i know that but if i let myself THINK that i won't ever make anything#as evidenced by me basically not making anything for months and months and months now#and if i have a plan maybe my parents won't be too sore about me dropping out. if i choose to drop out that is#(<- probably shouldn't drop out but man.... man..........)#and maybe having that rigidity and those concrete results will suit me better than school#which at best gives me 'number go up' and at worst gives me 'number go down'#im struggling with the scale of things but i am hand-drawing calendars and shit#and honestly im extremely lucky to be in a situation where this sort of thing is tenable at all so. why not use it?#ugh i should probably get my bachelor's though. i wanna take a gap year so bad but it wouldn't Really do me any good probably#thought too hard about college and now my motivation is just gushing out of me. fucks sake#what a wound!! i think i might hate school a little bit unfortunately#which sucks bc when im not fighting for my fucking life in there it's quite lovely very much my kinda thing etc#one way i could kinda test the schedule is by using the summer as a trial run. that way I wouldn't need to drop out#but i would still have a decent chunk of time to like.. test out my model and adjust it#(so i don't drop out and then immediately realize i Cannot do this shit at all)#but honestly i kind of think i should just. maybe drop out anyway and then get a job if this fails#easier said than done i know but again maybe something more tangible would help me#and i would appreciate some of the independence it'd give me tbqh#i really honestly don't know if i can actually like. Do art or writing. in the career sense#even disregarding money as a factor i just don't know if i could actually Make anything#whicfh is bananas bc in a literal sense i have been Making things for like 20 years#idk. i think i'll let this stew for a bit and come back (<- the kind of behavior that keeps me from making things)#(<- i mean knowing when to step back is crucial i just do it wayyyyyyy too often. anyway)
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I’m gonna need to get one of those pill counter things aren’t I
#3 pills every morning with breakfast and as soon as the pharmacy contacts me I’ll have a 4th#I’ve been carrying the bottles with me from my room to the breakfast table so I remember they exist while I have food and drink right there#but also at this point that means juggling the bottles while also not awake/caffeinated/medicated. which makes my wrists and hands sad#idk it just feels weird to realize how many drugs I’m on now. how many I’ll be on for the rest of my life#it’s not even scary ones! one of thems a normal allergy med#lol while writing this I got a notification from the pharmacy. so yeah 4 meds tomorrow morning#but yeah! idk shits wild. there’s nothing wrong with being medicated and I definitely don’t wanna go off meds#I like not sneezing all the time and being in less pain#based on how I felt yesterday my last year of school is gonna be SO much easier to handle with adhd meds#but just. idk. this might be an internalized ableism thing cuz I can’t place my finger on Why this feels weird
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Contemplating spending money to have a small set up to try and make a pixel art comic…….
#does anyone wanna be my patron and send me 60$ for ART I’ll send you the comic for free when I’m done lmao#I’ll send you the comic AND make you some else too/j#I’m actually joking tho I think I’m gonna do this sometime in the future#I think I could tell a lot more stories through art and I love pixel art#it’s easier to draw to me#I can free hand it easier as well#idk…. I think I wanna seriously try this thing#and this one story… maybe all my stories that aren’t fanfic will be better as art#or art and some written text.#idk. I do really wanna try it though.#but it might be like…. a next month thing. I have a lot of shit I have to save for right now#christmas paying my sister back and my video game services…. though I might cancel my Nintendo one cause I just don’t use it but also it’s#20 for a year so it’s not that much but when your unemployed…. 20$ is 20$
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𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧
Spencer gets a bad bout of amnesia. Or, your boyfriend forgets he’s your boyfriend, but he still has a crush on you. [3k]
c: fem, bombshell!reader, head injury, hospitals, amnesia, fluff, spencer can’t believe he bagged you, requested here
˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚⋆
Spencer wakes to an empty room.
He lays on a pillow too flat, neck twinging, the back of his eyes throbbing when he moves.
He struggles to breathe through his nose and lets his mouth open for a few achy breaths, his mouth dry like he’s been sucking on cotton balls.
Spencer’s alarmed, without a clue what it is he’s done. He wonders where Gideon is, if the older man has come to see him yet. He hopes somebody told his mom he’s okay.
Maybe Hotch will come. He and Hotch have grown closer while Gideon was on his mandated recovery time; Gideon spends far less time in the office, sticking to lectures, seminars and consults, while Hotch, Morgan and Spencer handle the away cases. Spencer might go as far as to say Hotch likes him. And Morgan can tolerate him now, less grudging when Spencer offers a random fact or statistic to further the case.
A stab of pain at the back of his head makes itself known sharply.
Spencer doesn’t want to move, but he needs to assess things. He frowns at his arms, naked as they are. His silver watch is missing. A t-shirt that he doesn’t remember buying stretches over his chest. What state are they in, and who dressed him?
He’s scowling at the window with it’s wide-open blinds and all the sun when the door opens.
You’re looking at the bags on your arm as you come in. Spencer startles in his blankets —what are you doing here? Agent L/N, Morgan’s friend and a candidate for the open position on the BAU team. You’re from the Sex Crimes Unit, like Greenaway.
Spencer flusters every time he sees you, not just because of how kind you’d been the first time you met, or even the easy flirtation you send his way when you cross paths. It’s because you’re the prettiest woman he’s ever seen. He’s not talking about the golden ratio or statistical beauty, you’re just stunning. You stop him in his tracks whenever you steal into the office. It’s better when you notice he’s awake and light up like he’s the winning numbers for tonight’s lottery pull. Everything about you illuminates.
“Hey, babe!” you say, not not yelling as you drop your bags in the seat by the bed and reach for him.
He doesn’t think to move away as you take his face into your hands.
“I’m so glad you’re finally awake, you almost slept for the full twenty four hours.” Your hands are soft. They smell like neroli. When you stroke his cheek and lean down to give him a chaste peck, he almost passes out there and then. “It's a good thing, obviously,” you say, and then kiss him again distractedly. Spencer squeezes his eyes closed. “You heal more when you’re asleep. Or so I’ve heard.”
You pull away, Spencer blinking for his life. You have such a nice mouth, but Spencer’s never thought about what it might feel like on his. He doesn’t have the audacity: in what world would you ever kiss him? That’s the joke, right, when you flirt with him in the office?
“How are you feeling?” you ask, losing some of your pep. “How’s your head, handsome? You know, there are easier ways to get a haircut.”
“They cut my hair?” he croaks.
“Shaved it at the back to stitch you up. Not much, don’t worry. They were pushing for a buzz cut but I put my foot down on that one,” you joke. You nudge his legs aside without worrying about sitting on him as you get comfortable. “It’s not much. You can’t tell.”
“I…”
“You feeling okay?” you ask softly. Your nice mouth purses. Your eyebrows pinch. They’re cute eyebrows.
“You look different than the last time I saw you.”
He doesn’t mean to say it aloud. He’s noticing things now. You’re wearing less powder under your eyes than you used to. You seem to have gained a little weight, and you look good. You didn’t look bad before, but this is different. Your hair isn’t too different, nor your brows, but you’ve begun lining your lips in a new way. Your blush is a subtler hue. Spencer doesn’t claim to know everything about you, but he can say that you look neatly the same each time you visit. Why the sudden change?
“It’s hard to sleep when your favourite person in the world gets his head cut open,” you say, taking his hand where he’d left it loose in the blankets.
Your fingers slip into his with ease.
“Can I tell you something?” he asks, attempting to swallow his nerves.
“Of course you can.”
He licks his lips. “Uh, I think I’m confused. I don’t– I don’t remember what happened, and…”
“Oh, right. They told me this might happen.” You draw yourself up with a breath. He’s fascinated by the movement, an air of heat around him as you begin rubbing the back of his hand with your thumb. “You got hit in the back of the head with a cinder block, honey. Went down like a lead balloon.” You turn your face to show your cheek. “We’re even now on good scares, yeah?”
You have a scar on your face he’d missed, carefully concealed but yet not invisible. Your hand in his feels so alien he holds it wrong, fingers twined but palms apart.
“What happened to you?” he asks.
Your brow crinkles. You go very still. “My cheek?” you ask.
“What…”
“Spencer, what’s the last thing you can remember, honey?” you ask, all the horror in the world to be found in your eyes.
“Uh…” He feels sick to his stomach.
“Spencer?”
Without having to be told, you slip off of the bed with two taps of your shoes and reach for the bedpan, thrusting it into his lap.
His mouth fills with spit. “I’m fine,” he says.
“No, I don’t think so. Let me get a doctor.”
“Wait,” he says, clutching the bedpan and pushing his wave of nausea as far down as he can. “Please don’t go.”
“My face was months ago, honey. I got hit in the face with a hammer by a UnSub, you don’t remember?” you ask incredulously.
“Why do you keep calling me honey?” he asks. He knows the answer, but it’s not computing.
Your face drains of any happiness. “I’m going to get a doctor,” you say, shoulders rigidly tight as you exit the room, leaving Spencer in your wake wishing he’d just pretended he knew who you were, just until you kissed him again.
—
“And he really can’t remember you at all?” Morgan asks.
You’re a little less startled than you had been, and you’re trying not to punish poor Spencer, but realising your boyfriend forgot years of flirting, and yearning, and friendship —years of kissing in secret and otherwise, years of holding hands, and staying at each other’s places to get that extra time together, even if it was just getting to sleep in the same bed between cases— was a slap.
“He remembers me,” you say, leg crossed over the other, arm over the railing of Spencer’s bed to hold his hand. “He just doesn’t remember a thing after Gideon came back, after Boston.”
“I remember when you had hair,” Spencer says to Derek.
Derek glares at him, “This Spencer doesn’t get to sass me.”
“But I do eventually?”
“How come you’re holding hands if he doesn’t know who you are?” Derek asks pointedly.
You shrug. “We talked about it, didn’t we?” you ask Spencer, who perks up every time you talk, which isn’t unlike your usual Spencer. Whenever he catches himself doing it he flusters. Every time you call him baby he loses his mind. “He doesn’t remember me, but he wants to. And I remember him.”
“This must be pretty weird for you, kid,” Derek says.
“Sort of,” Spencer says.
It’s funny. Now you know Spencer thinks he’s twenty three again, you can’t not notice his shyness and his awkward tries at casualness. You’d forgotten what he was like back then.
“Wait, does that mean you don’t remember Emily?” Derek asks.
Spencer frowns. “Uh, no?”
You sit up in your chair. “Emily’s one of your best friends, honey. She joined the BAU when Greenaway left.”
“Not you?” he asks.
You dramatise your pain as Derek laughs. “Not me. I didn’t transfer for a long time, unfairly. It’s okay, though, you’ll remember Emily eventually.”
When you realised Spencer wasn’t as okay as you’d thought, you gathered a gaggle of agitated doctors to assess him. He knew his name and birthday. He was wrong about the date, the president, and the state. You’re in Arizona where he’d thought Indiana. Your bag talks to the heat: Spencer’s fan, his sunblock, his antihistamines. He couldn’t believe it when he asked where his stuff was and you passed him your handbag.
You’re trying to drive home to him that you’re not just dating, you're common-law partners, Spence. He adores you. You’d spend life in his lap if you could afford it.
“How’d she get you to believe her?” Derek asks Spencer.
“Uh.”
“I kissed him a couple of times before he came clean about the amnesia,” you say. “So I didn’t have to explain.”
“I didn’t mean to lie,” Spencer says.
He’s looking less haggard now you’ve brushed his hair. It was sweet to watch his shoulders relax. He shuddered when you tucked a strand behind his ears, and didn’t flinch when you asked if you could kiss his cheek. It’s hard to have him vulnerable here and not be allowed to lick his wounds for him. You feel better the better he feels. You’ve fluffed his pillow, wrapped him tighter in blankets. When he got up to pee and you offered to help, he gave a resolute No Thank You, which in hindsight is hilarious but at the time made you wanna squeeze your eyes out.
“It’s okay,” you say softly, “I don’t mind kissing him, even if he doesn’t remember me. Just so long as he doesn’t mind it back.”
Spencer manages to squeeze your hand. It’s a soft one, but it’s real. “I don’t mind.”
“You dog,” Derek says.
“Stop, stop. He’s not doing anything wrong, is he?” you ask. “I’m the evil one, forcing kisses on him when he doesn’t know me.”
“I do know you,” Spencer says.
“What’s it like to have a crush on your own girlfriend?” Derek asks, unwilling to quit his teasing where he’s crossing his arms in the chair opposite, his cup of coffee drained on the side table.
Spencer swallows. “Uh, nerve-wracking.”
“Believe it or not, that’s not so different to now,” Derek says.
Spencer looks to you for confirmation, which you love. You slide your chair closer to him and clasp his wrist with your free hand. “Sometimes you're still a little shy, but it’s not so bad. Full of myself I may be, Spencer Reid, but you do love me. It’s easy with us.”
“Do we really live together?” he asks. “You said common-law.”
“Not technically. I stay at your place four nights a week. You stay with me for the weekends.”
“Every week?” he asks.
“Yeah.”
“We’re never apart?” he asks.
His face is turning pink. You could kiss every bit of colour on his cheeks.
“Derek, would you get Spencer something to eat from the cafeteria? Please?” you ask, levelling your friend with a pleading gaze.
Derek gathers himself up. “Sure. We gotta feed the string bean something, don’t we?” he asks.
Alone again, you draw lines up and down Spencer’s arm with your nails. You’re going to be indulgent in yourself, and ask him everything you’d ever wanted to know. And then a little extra, too.
“You’re not as skinny anymore, have you noticed? You’re quite lean.” You stand to sit where you’d put yourself before he confessed. Your hand falls to his knee. “Solid, sometimes. You and Derek go for walks occasionally.”
“We do?”
“Mm-hm. And me and you do yoga in the living room when we can summon the energy. We tried couples Pilates, but Pilates is hard.”
“We did?”
You smile warmly. “It’s nice to be in love with someone who loves in the same way.”
“How do you love?”
His ears are bitten-red. “Oh, you know. I’m too affectionate. It’s hard not to be with you. Everyone used to think we were… I don’t know, playing a game.” You slide your hand up his thigh, leaning on him to watch his pupils blow. “But I love you for far more than your constant propensity to blush. You get me flowers every time you see my favourites, and you never let me go to sleep without a kiss. Usually here.” You poke the skin beside your eye. “But sometimes you’ll surprise me and kiss my nose.” You're going lax with love, remembering things he’s done, and does every day. “On a Saturday morning we make tea and I put my hands in your t-shirt. You do the crosswords for fun. Sometimes we time them.”
“That’s not how you love, that’s what you love,” Spencer says.
“Oh, you want a play by play of things?” He ducks his chin, but he smiles when you laugh.
“I just can’t believe this is happening.”
You try to think of things you don’t think about anymore. “You love my sugar lip gloss, so I always wear it.”
He reaches out tentatively. Shy as a wren in a hedgerow. You let him curl a hand over your elbow, feel the crook of it with his index finger.
“I buy you stamps, and t-shirts for bed, and stupid stuff you wouldn’t get yourself. We’re… it’s like, it doesn’t feel like gift giving anymore because we’re always getting stuff for each other. You’re just as sweet, you know? When I first started sleeping over you bought me this huge pack of socks ‘cos yours are all odd,” you laugh. “I knew I loved you already, but…”
It’s a little sad, actually. He can’t remember all the stuff that makes you the couple you are. It’s not what you’d meant to get into.
“Can I ask you something?” you ask.
“Anything.”
He’s slept-in and breathless, like he ran laps in his dreams.
“What do you think of me now? I always wondered if you liked me back then, or if I just caught you off guard.”
“Who wouldn’t like you?”
“But did you?”
He looks away hurriedly, his hand dropping from your elbow. “I guess so. But it’s not– not real. I have a crush on you.” His mumbling is sweet. “I have no idea why I’m telling you that.”
“I had a crush on you, too, back then. It wasn’t anything serious, but it wasn’t a joke. And the more time we spent together, the more I thought we could fall in love,” —you take his hand and put it back on your arm— “and we did.”
You toy with his fingers. Without looking, ashamed of your own self-indulgence, you ask another question. “What do you think of me now?”
“I can’t remember,” he says sorrily.
“What do you think?”
“You feel like a dream.” He shakes his head. “You’re the most beautiful girl in the world. I don’t really get how this is real.”
You shouldn’t be surprised that he’d say it, you practically begged for it, but you can’t stop yourself from sitting up to kiss his forehead gently. “It’s real. Promise. And for the record, you’re handsome. They stopped saying ‘aged like fine wine’ a while ago. Now they just say ‘aged like Spencer Reid’.”
He gives a choky laugh.
The door opens again. You lift your head expecting Derek and find a weather worm Hotch in the doorway. “Reid, you’re awake,” he says, not bothering with a smile. “Morgan said you have amnesia?” He directs it at both of you.
Spencer’s looking at Hotch in clear shock.
“He hasn’t aged that badly,” you chastise teasingly.
“Hotch, you’re– I thought you would’ve– You’re still–?”
Hotch squints. “You didn’t think I had the stamina for it?”
Spencer squirms under his gaze. “No, sir, it’s not that–”
“Sir,” Hotch says, and then he smiles. “I forgot when you both used to respect me.”
“I have the utmost respect for you, sir,” you say through your own smile.
“Has she been kind to you, Reid?”
“Uh, yes? Is she not usually?”
Hotch presses his lips together rather than answer. There’s a sympathy in his expression you resent.
—
It’s a thankfully quick bout of amnesia. The memories start to draw in like a dusting of powdered sugar, his head finely silted, one particle at a time. He finds that the more you talk, the quicker his memory is jogged. You tell him about your first kiss —I tried to kiss your cheek but you moved, it was the funniest thing— and your second. You spin stories of cases, the worst ones and the best, all the times you held hands without people knowing, the times you’d been caught. He can’t imagine it, goes hot with the memory, picturing kissing you as you’d described and the mortification of being walked in on.
You tell him about your vacation to Nevada a few months ago and he thinks about how you’d fallen asleep on the plane. Your nose in his arm, your unhappy sigh at the tight leg space.
Remembering you is more than half of remembering himself.
Your hands —his hands. Your smile —his laugh. The way you fold his hands in your lap —the urge to catch your chin for a kiss.
He doesn’t know how to deal with it, and then suddenly he feels like Spencer. Your partner, your love, his proudest title for years. You’re standing at the end of the hospital bed in pajamas folding your clothes, allowed to stay the night while he’s so urgently confused and upset, you can’t make him stay here alone, please, I know you guys have those little cots for the kids ward, and he just knows you completely.
Hours of diligent if embezzled storytelling gives it all back to him.
“I like the lipgloss because you used to wear that perfume that smelled like sugar donuts,” he says, scratching a hand through limp hair. “And every time I crossed the square by the station–”
You let out a surprising squeal of joy. “Spencer!” you say, racing to take his hands, “Yes! The donut truck!”
You go in for a kiss he gladly returns. “Oh, you remember,” you say, softening as he takes your neck into his hand. “I was getting worried.”
“Some of it’s still hazy, but not so much you.”
You wrap your arms around him for a hug, careful of his sore head. “I missed you, Spencer. I still loved you when you couldn’t remember me, but I missed you. Do you remember you?”
He traces the scar on your lower cheek with his thumb. He’s genuinely relieved to be able to say he does. He’s not scared of what you think of him anymore, ‘cos he knows that everything he feels for you is mutual. “I remember you telling me my bad feeling was just a case of the heebies.”
You bend into his touch. “Honey, I’m sorry. How was I supposed to know you’d get your skull whacked with a cinder block? It was a bakery. I thought the worst that could happen was getting a face full of red velvet or something.” You kiss his nose quickly. “I’m so glad you’re you. Now I can sleep in the bed with you, and not that collapsible camping cot.”
He shushes you. “Don’t give us away. They’re not gonna let you stay if they think I’m fine.”
You giggle excitedly, arms around him again for another squeeze. “I missed you so much. You’re so devious now.”
He rubs your back. “I missed you too. And I still have a crush on you, I swear.”
“Thank you, honey, that means a lot to me.”
˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚⋆
thanks for reading!
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid scenario#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fanfiction
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(Poly 141 x medic reader, where you might as well be the sun to them)
The phrase started as a whisper.
It drifted through the base like smoke curling around corners, impossible to pin down but impossible to ignore.
“Here comes the sun.”
It bounced off walls, passing lips in hushed tones, slipping into conversations as a half-joke, half-omen. At first, the 141 didn’t pay it much attention. Soldiers had their quirks, their superstitions- rituals to keep them sane when missions dragged too long and they smelled more blood than earth. But this one stuck.
Price furrowed his brow the first time he heard it. Ghost only tilted his head slightly, filing it away. Gaz grimaced and muttered something about troops getting weird ideas. Soap, though- he took notice.
He’d caught it more than once before a mission, said like a prayer or maybe a warning. He’d asked around, but answers were vague. “You’ll know when you see it.” That’s all they’d tell him. It irritated him to no end.
Then the mission happened.
It was supposed to be a clean extraction. A quick in-and-out, but things went sideways fast. Soap had been covering the team’s six when the ambush hit. A sharp crack split the air, followed by the searing pain in his side. He hit the ground hard, blood soaking into the dirt, a familiar, burning ache travelling through his body.
“Soap’s hit!” Gaz’s voice barked through comms, panic threading through the static.
“Pull him out!” Price ordered.
But the line fizzled and died. Soap’s world narrowed- gunfire, shouts, and the taste of copper in his mouth. He couldn’t hear the others anymore. The ground felt colder than it should have. He pressed his hand against the wound, but it was bad. Really bad.
This is it, he thought. This is where I die.
The edges of his vision blurred. He barely noticed the figure sprinting toward him until a flash of bright red and orange, a blazing fire, pierced through the smoke and haze.
Like the sun.
You hit the ground beside him, all motion and precision, your gear unlike anything he’d ever seen. Bright red and orange covered your tactical vest and helmet- colors that didn’t belong in a war zone. Colors that should’ve made you a target, a dead woman walking.
But instead, you looked like salvation.
“Stay with me, Sargeant.” You said, voice sharp and steady. You weren’t panicked- not even a little. It was comforting.
Soap stared, wide-eyed, as your hands worked quickly to stop the bleeding. He should’ve been paying attention to the pain, to the gunfire, to anything else- but he couldn’t stop looking at you.
“What the hell are ya wearing?” he rasped, because that was apparently the only thought his brain could form.
You didn’t look up. “Bright colors make it easier to spot me. Medics don’t have the luxury of hiding- we have to be seen when it counts.”
“It’s bloody ridiculous.” he muttered- and then sucked in a sharp breath as you tightened the bandage.
“Maybe,” you said, finally glancing at him. “But it got me here, didn’t it?”
Soap’s heart stumbled. Your eyes were sharp, focused- but there was something else there too, something warm. Something steady.
Here comes the sun.
It hit him all at once. That’s what the others meant. It wasn’t just the colors. It was you. The way you moved, the way your voice cut through the noise, the way you didn’t hesitate for a second.
“Stay awake, Sargeant.” You ordered, and for the first time in his life, he didn’t have a single smart remark.
Much later, he woke up in the med tent, groggy but alive, and immediately found himself staring at you again.
You were restocking supplies nearby, your bright gear an almost comical contrast to the sterile white walls. The moment you noticed him looking, you crossed the room.
“You’re awake,” you said, checking his vitals. Your voice was softer now, calm and patient. He felt like he could melt. “Good.”
“You’re real.” He blurted out before he could stop himself.
You raised an eyebrow, tilting your head. “What?”
“Thought I was hallucinating.” He gestured vaguely at your vest, a grin cracking on his lips. “I mean, look at ya.” Lovely. The sun has never looked better.
Your lips twitched, like you were holding back a smile. “I get that a lot.”
Before he could come up with anything else to say- anything remotely smooth- the tent flap opened.
Price, Ghost, and Gaz stepped in, their eyes immediately landing on you. And for once, Soap wasn’t the only one caught off guard.
Gaz blinked. “You’re… bright.”
“Easy to spot.” You said, beaming.
Ghost stared at you for a few seconds longer, peering, before he spoke. “…You’re the sun.”
Price studied you for a long moment as well, then nodded like something clicked into place with a sigh. “Makes sense.”
You, on the other hand, looked confused and unsure, tilting your head once more in the way kittens do.
Soap couldn’t stop staring. He barely even heard the others talking, answering your confusion. All he could think about was how you’d shown up when he thought he was done for- and how you’d looked like a fiery star in the vast expanse of a cold, dark sky.
You glanced at him again, eyes sharp and warm all at once, lips quirking in a delicate smile while Gaz talked with you.
Here comes the sun, he thought.
(… would it be possible to cradle the sun, such warmth, in his hands?)
Part Two
#noona.writes#cod x reader#cod x you#cod#tf 141 x reader#tf 141 x you#tf 141#cod imagines#john price x reader#simon ghost riley x you#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x you#ghost x reader#johnny soap mctavish x you#johnny soap mctavish x reader#poly 141 x you#poly!141 x reader#kyle gaz garrick x you#kyle gaz garrick x reader#gaz x you#gaz x reader#poly 141 x reader#poly!141#poly 141#john price x you
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going to the beach with toji and kids for the first time ever. it's only the beginning of your relationship, it's all kind of new – toji doesn't know what's about to hit him. sure, he's seen you with megumi and tsumiki before, but this? this is something else.
not only is his heart doing flips at the sight of the big smiles and the loud bursts of laughter you're managing to pull out of his kids, you're also wearing a fucking bikini. he hasn't seen this much of you before – the furthest you've gone during the late hours of the nights are steamy, handsy makeouts. he did take your shirt off the last time he had you below him but then you were interrupted by the little spiky haired boy, sniffling about a bad dream. after grabbing a blanket to cover you up, toji rested his forehead against your warm skin, grumbling something under his breath before looking up at you with soft eyes. you weren't mad – quite the opposite; you ruffled his hair and cradled his face, a gentle smile splayed on your lips. you pressed a haste kiss to his nose and then ushered him off of you, whispering something about his adorable son. toji scoffed. and smiled to himself.
the bikini. is killing him. he doesn't know what to do with himself. the scene playing in front of him is heart-warming and he should only be thinking about that, but how can he? the material is barely covering anything and you just look so... fucking good.
sitting in the shade, toji let's his head loll back, his eyes closing as he rests his hand over his face with a groan. he can't do it anymore. he's doing brain exercises to not pop the hardest boner of his life and you are not making it any easier when you keep giving him the prettiest smiles. you're happy, the kids are happy – everything should be good, but no – here he is, suffering because his parter looks fucking amazing. the fact that this is even a problem is mind-baffling to him. he is a strong man, no person is going to get to him just by being beauti—
"could you pass me the water, please?"
you're out to get him, he's sure of it.
toji peeks from under his hand and he's immediately blinded by a devil in disguise. the sun shines from behind you like a halo and the grin on your lips reaches behind your ears. sweat coats your skin and it makes toji's mouth salivate. what the fuck are you doing to him? hands on your hips, you stare down at your boyfriend and you give him another second to collect himself before quirking up a brow.
"toji?" you sound like a siren, you're pulling him in with your silky smooth tone. "the water, please?"
the corners of your eyes crinkle as you smile and toji has never moved faster in his entire life. "right."
he reaches for the bottle in the cooler beside him and gives it to you while making sure to look at you in the eyes and nowhere else. it's unbelievably hard – especially when the water starts trickling from the corners of your mouth and down your neck. toji gulps before turning to look at his kids instead. gumi's brows are furrowed as he's building his sandcastle while miki is busy building hers. toji cracks a grin.
"they're so– fucking cute." you whisper when you curse, a playful smile on your lips as you gush about the kids.
you love them so much already and you're glad that they seem to be liking you a lot too. that makes toji very happy; when the kids ask about you when they haven't seen you in a few days, when you do the same – he knows you really might be the one. it's a big thing to say, to even think, but he can't help it. it simply seems... right.
the water bottle hangs in front of his face and he's pulled away from his thoughts again. he goes to grab it and when he does, your free hand reaches out to him. warm finger wrap around his wrist and he melts at the soft, gentle touch. "come play with us."
a groan bubbles from his throat but it couldn't be any further from an annoyed one – you're sweet and you're excited, you're pretty and you're patient; you always welcome him and the kids with open arms and a bright smile. she would've loved you.
he throws the bottle aside and wraps his own hand around your own. "ya wanna play or the kids wanna play?"
his raspy voice and the stupidly handsome smirk he gives you make butterflies bloom and dance in your stomach. he makes you giddy, he makes you happy.
"i wanna play." you tug at him. "and the kids wanna play."
he can't say no to his little blessings and he can't say no to you. maybe running around will help clear his mind from the mischievious thoughts in his head. he doubts it, but he's needs to try.
in one swift move, he pulls your hand to his mouth while pretending to bite you and his eyes fucking twinkle when he sees your cute surprised expression and hears your little gasp. there's a moment, a second of the most comfortable silence before the corners of your lips twitch and you yank away from his hold, booking it towards gumi and miki with a loud cackle as toji pushes off the chair and takes off after you with fast steps.
your cheeks hurt from laughing as you watch toji catch megumi; he lifts gumi up with just one hand while tsumiki tries to poke her dad in the ribs in order for him to let boy go. when he finally lets the kids go... you feel his eyes on you. adrenaline pumps in your veins and you feel like a deer caught in the headlights of a car. you can't stop grinning. he can't either. a pair of arms wrap around your middle and your feet are being lifted up above the ground before you can even react.
while the kids are doubled over, running and stumbling over their own feet, toji growls in your ear. "gotcha."
you will take the next step today. no snotty kid of his will cockblock him again – they will be tired from the day and you will be all his to take care of. he'll show you his appreciation for being so good to him and the kids, for being so kind. and so... fucking hot.
he presses a kiss to your jaw but cringes when gumi and miki dramatically scream 'ew' at him. you feel him getting even warmer, his cheeks heating up and you try to save him by shooing the kids with a laugh. toji is grateful. he's happy that you're here.
#hehehehe>:33333#toji#wtf mickey can write#toji x reader#toji x you#toji drabble#toji fushiguro#toji fushiguro x reader#toji fushiguro x you#toji fushiguro drabble#toji fushiguro fluff#jjk toji#jjk x reader#jjk drabble#toji fluff#jjk fluff
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Ok no one asked but I've been tempted to make Jackie and Olivia stalien designs since I've been working on some new icons for the eternal gales stalien kiddos and it's been making me also think abt how disastrous it would be if they were in the same stalien society that the main cast are from because dear god would they either die instantly or make things so much worse. Even if they did get lucky enough to be able to be remotely near a position to found a stalien version of gravitas, no way in hell they'd be able to get far enough to even begin their own morally corrupt downfall before one of the other big companies forcibly assimilated gravitas into their own corporations and do the same shit but way WAY worse. Even if Jackie Was in a position to eventually climb the ladder enough to get to a more ceo position shed probably end up painting a target on her back way before she could get there, as her and Olivia's whole infinite power research would be very much unwanted by most of the ceo elders. Oh and Olivia would be fucked even beyond that because she's a biologist lol so at best she's going to be forced to drop every last one of her morals and barely scrape by
#rat rambles#oni posting#eternal gales#posts that will immediately isolate every last one of my followers rip the the recent oni followers sorry for the no context#anyways realistically olivia and jackie wouldnt be in positions of power just statistically and as such would be dead in their early 20s#well by their early 20s most dont make it that long#but assuming they ended up in jobs that sort of line up with their canon jobs theyd both likely be working at the convieor facility#aka where mason was supposed to work at and where dancer and helmet where both held as lil kids#and if you know anything abt that whole situation then you know that olivia and jackie are not winning in the job lottery here lol#now assuming that they stick to similar specialties olivia definitely has the more extreme shit to be stuck doing here since well. y'know.#but jackie might theoretically be able to luck out a bit and not be hands on in the surgons branch#she would probably still have to work with them but shed be more so in charge of collecting the data and deciding what to do with it#this means shed be more closely working with the twos boss for better or for worse#most likely for worse but yknow#olivia and jackie Could stand a chance at making it past the first culling checkpoint due to them being useful enough but thats a maybe#it mostly just depends on what direction they try to take their research and if it's smth their boss would take interest in#so less 'bettering society' and more 'making our lives specifically easier'#so no infinite power or at least not with any intent on wide scale application#if olivia could figure out the whole biolengineering thing somehow without ever having seen an animal then that could save her#one big issue that the facility is meant to be solving is the whole corpse crisis#aka stalien corpses dont rly decompose well especially without other wildlife to help#and as you might have been able to gleam there are a lot of corpses on these guys hands#so finding methods of body desposal is a big research point of the surgons branch#now ofc this research does indeed make more corpses but hey at least theyre smaller ones. iykyk.#anyways the main question for me when it comes to hypothetical jackie and olivia stalien designs is what color energy do they have#because usually I just go off eye color but they dont have canon eye colors so I could get more creative#also if I just go with my designs for them then theyd both just have red or yellow energy#which I could certainly work with but idk if I want either to be red and I dont want both to be yellow#plus red and yellow are technically both based in the same color energy anyways so it still feels unapealing#I could make jackie a pale purple or black varient and olivia a particularly dense yellow varient
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