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justoneday-namjoonii · 4 years

Text

Quarters. | 8

☼1 • 2 • 3 • 4 • 5 • 6 • 7 • 8

prompt: Sitting here, patching myself up. Crying over what's left, 'cause without you I ain't shit, but no pressure guess I gotta learn my lesson. Sorry — 6LACK

pairing: Jungkook x reader

warnings/au: dysfunctional relationship with a capital D, family drama, humor(i try), temptations, drug usage, relapsing, hoeing, mentions and accusations of infidelity, jk has baby-fever for two seconds if you squint,, bloody, 18+ for heavy scenes, fluff, angst, this is purely fiction please do not read if you are sensitive or easily triggered boxer!au, iceskater!au.

authors note: omg FINALLY💜🐰 this chapter really took everything I had lol, like always, this part is a little out there, their relationship gets tested and they’re forced to grow. Will edit later. enjoy!

It’s so early in the morning, the sun is just now rising—the beauty does nothing for your anxiety though.

You told Jungkook that he needs to rest, he needs to take it easy and clear his mind before he walks into that hospital. The last thing you need is a stressed Jungkook behind the wheel, he’s way too unpredictable when he’s upset. After a few minutes of going back and forth, he gave up and let you drive him—in his car. This is a privilege. He doesn’t let anyone drive his car, not his best friends, not even you. He says, no one knows how to handle her like I do.

It always makes you laugh when he says that.

Jungkook glances at you as you take a turn at a questionable speed. He’s definitely driving back home.

You look around the crowded parking lot and pull into a visitor's parking space, squeezing between the white lines surprisingly well.

“That was a long drive,” You pull the key out of the ignition and turn your head to look at him, “but we made it.”

Jungkook doesn’t turn to look at you, rather, he takes a deep breath and his eyes shut before he drags his hands down his face. “I’m gonna warn you now, I’m going off on him if he gives me some shit excuse as to why he decided to leave me out of the loop on this.”

“Jungkook, please don’t do that. Stay calm, for your mother's sake and mine, I’m nervous.” You sigh, trying to grasp the fact that you’re about to meet his family for the first time. You open your door and slide out, naturally, you assumed he was doing the same thing. When you drop the keys into your purse and close the door, he still in the passenger's seat, head in his hands.

“Jungkook.” You stomp around the vehicle and open his door. “Come on, we need to go inside,”

He sighs, heavy black boots landing on the pavement when he gets out of the car, stretching his legs in the hugging black jeans. When he closes the door, he bends down to look at himself in the window, hair still a little wet.

“You look good with messy hair, don’t fix it too much,” You smile, trying to lighten the mood, he smiles a little but he’s back to that grave face in just a few seconds. His silver necklace is a nice touch to his outfit you notice, he paired it with his hooped earrings and you think it looks really charming.

You haven’t been to a hospital in a while. Nurses with bright colored scrubs come to and from the nurse's station, visitors pace around the gift shop, hoping to find the perfect for their loved one. When you two get signed in as visitors, your eyes wander to the couple at the sliding doors, the woman is in a wheelchair holding her baby and the man is trying to help in any way possible, the nurse gazes at him fondly. She knows he’s trying hard.

“Here you go, she’s in room 202A,” The nurse hands you the sticky tags to and points you in the right direction. Jungkook breathes in, looking like the antiseptic and sterile environment makes him dizzy.

“Should I get her a gift?” Your eyes follow the family walking out of the gift shop with get well balloons and teddy bears.

“You can, she’d like that,” He follows you into the gift shop and you go straight to the bunnies in the corner. After sorting through the stuffed animals, you pick the little pink one in the back. Now that you see the bunny, it’s only right to get her a balloon and some flowers.

“Hi there,” She cashier greets you, taking your items to ring them up, “great choices.”

“Thanks,” You smile, proud that this random lady approves of your gifts.

It’s not long before you’re leaving the shop to finally meet see her, to finally meet his family. Does Jungkook have her eyes? The cute sun rays at the corner of his eyes when he laughs, does he get that from her? These questions swarm your mind when Jungkook's hand grips the doorknob, just seconds away from opening another part of his world to you.

“Knock, knock,” He opens the door and the brightest smile came to his face when he sees the woman on the bed. He beckons you to follow and you just know you must have the most awkward smile on your face.

“Jungkook! Oh my gosh, I didn’t know you were coming!”

She looks at him like he’s a puppy – as if he’s the epitome of love and innocence.

He runs to give her a hug, eyes squeezing shut, relieved that she’s in one piece and smiling that life-saving smile. “I’m glad you’re okay mom,” He sighs, standing back and reaching for you to shuffle you towards his mother, “this is Y/n, my girlfriend.”

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you,” You smile, holding your gifts out to her, “this is for you, I hope you like it.”

“Aw, thank you, honey,” She takes the bunny with bright eyes and you sit the flowers on the stand beside her bed, “I’m so glad he brought you to meet me. I hate that we’re meeting under these circumstances though.”

“Jooe called me last night, scared me half to death,” Jungkook takes a seat in the recliner beside her and you sit in the little cushioned bench near the window, “are you okay?”

“I’m as good as can be expected, I guess,” She continues to talk to Jungkook and just observe them, admiring their similarities—you note that she looks very young, “I felt terrible yesterday. The doctors told me that I got here right on time, the appendix was badly ruptured, it felt like cramps from hell.”

“Where’s Kev and Jooe?” Jungkook says her husband's name differently than his little sisters.

“She was getting restless, he took her to get something from the cafeteria. Something tells me you’re not too happy with him, and my intuition never lies so what’s the problem?”

“Mom, I got the call that you were in the hospital from Jooe. Why didn’t he call me? Why does she have a phone, by the way? She’s 6.”

“I know, she told me.” She lets out a sigh, knowing where Jungkook is going. “It’s an emergency cellphone app on her tablet, it’s not an actual phone.”

He dismisses the information to return to his original topic. “I shouldn’t have gotten a call that you were in the hospital from her. Kev, your husband, should have let me know.”

“Jungkook, he was stressed out, okay? He was trying to make sure I was okay so his attention was a little divided, don’t be too hard on him.”

“He did it on purpose, he’s always tried to keep me out of the loop when it comes to you. I’m fucking tired of it-”

“Kookie!”

A high-pitched voice squeals from an adorable little girl with two long jet-black pigtails atop her head. She runs from the man once holding her hand to jump into Jungkook’s arms. It’s evident in his mother's eyes that her heart is melting at the sight.

“It’s good to see you too, Jooe,” He giggles, pulling back to get a good look at her, “Hey, I want you to meet someone.”

You squirm anxiously, for some reason wanting her more than anyone else approval.

“She’s really special to me,” When she adjusts to sit in his lap, she finally looks at you. He leans to whisper in her ear, “say hi.” He moves her to fully face you, making both of your eyes go wide at meeting each other.

“Hi,” She shyly waves, back leaning into Jungkook to seek comfort.

“Hi, I’m Y/n,” You wave, “you’re so pretty, you look just like your mom.”

She blushes, hands grabbing at her yellow sun-dress instinctively. “Thank you, you’re really pretty too.” She cracks a bright smile and her attention goes to her mother when she starts asking her about what she ate for breakfast.

“Jungkook, I didn’t think you’d be able to make it,” Kev finally speaks and the sparkle in Jungkook’s eyes fades instantly.

“Well, here I am.” Jungkook shoots back, eyes menacing and dark within a matter of seconds.

“Um, hello,” You stand up to greet who you assume if ‘Kev,’ hand extended and he takes it in a friendly manner, “I’m Y/n, you’re Kevin, right? It’s nice to meet you, I’m Jungkook’s-”

“You must be his better half,” You nod, scooting back to sit down, “a pleasure to meet you, sweetheart.”

A million-dollar pearly smile, business clothes on, hair slicked back like that of a TV-doctors—he seems really kind, you can’t see why Jungkook would have such a problem with him. It’s hard to sit here knowing he’s the reason Jungkook wasn’t invited to his step-brother's wedding. The reason he called you drunk as hell because he was so hurt—this guy did that to him.

“Has the doctor been in to talk to you? I have a call to jump on but I want to be with you to see what she says.”

“Don’t worry about it, honey, take your call, I know you’re pressed for time,” She sighs in relief, “I’m just glad Jungkook is here, I feel better just from seeing his face,” She reaches for his hand and a spark of pride comes to him, “it’s been too long.”

He knows and guilt eats him up for that more than she knows.

“Well, you know Jungkook, he’s got a busy life, doesn't have too much time for stuff like this,” He laughs a little, eyes landing on you for a moment, “I’m sure you get that, don’t you hon?”

He’s looking at you and you turn a little pale. You look at Jungkook, and then open your mouth to utter out something, “Well, um, no I-...”

“Kev, leave the girl alone,” Jungkook’s mom intervenes, noticing how flustered you looked.

“I can’t make time for shit that I don’t even know is happening,” Now it’s Jungkook’s turn to laugh, but not out of genuine amusement, he’s doing it to stay calm, “What do you expect? You don’t tell me shit.”

“All you have to do it ask,” Kevin stands next to his wife, opening up his phone to absentmindedly tap the screen.

“That’s bullshit...” Jungkook let one too many words slip before thinking of the child in his lap who’s more focused on his phone than anything. The two of them make you feel uneasy, it’s like one wrong word from either of them would start a brawl.

“No!” Jooe exclaims, sliding off of Jungkook’s lap, “I left my sweater in the cafeteria! I have to go get it before someone takes it!” Distress befalls her and now the whole room's attention is on her.

“Jooe, I told you to make sure you kept it wrapped around your waist,” Kev doesn’t look like he wants to go but he grudgingly stands to his feet. “Come on,”

“Do you want me to take her? I was going to get coffee anyway, I can help her look for it.” You look at Jooe with a sweet smile.

“Oh, are you sure? I mean, as long as you don’t mind I fine with it,” It’s almost like you answered his prayer because he fell back into a chair with a sigh of relief.

“Of course I don’t mind,” You stand up, holding out your hand, “is it okay if I go with you, Jooe?” She nods, taking your hand without hesitation. Jungkook looks in awe as you seem to already be a favorite of his little sisters—he’s never seen you interact with children, but it warms his heart.

“We’ll be back everyone,”

You wave to the room as you go on a mission to find the missing sweater. As soon as the door closed, Jungkook’s mom smirks at him.

“What? You’re giving me a weird look.”

“She’s so sweet Jungkook, oh my gosh. I’m so glad you brought her, I’ve never met one of your girlfriends before, she must really be something. Look, Kev,” She points to the flowers and the bunny in bed next to her, “she brought me these cute gifts.”

“That’s sweet,” He looks up from his phone, then at Jungkook, “you better hang on to her.”

“That’s what I’m doing,” Jungkook scoffs. “So all l I have to do is ask, you expect me to have to beg for information on my own mother?”

“We live in different city’s and sometimes it’s easy to handle things and let you know after everything's said and done.” He reasons, eyes going to his cellphone in an attempt to exit the conversation peacefully. To both his mother and Kev’s surprise, he leaves it at that—not cussing, not lashing out, he just sinks back into his seat, expression unreadable. Jungkook remembered that you asked him not to lash out, and he’s so tempted to, but he’s gotta keep things under control for you.

You must have made a difference in him because this isn’t the Jungkook they’re used to.

* * *

“What color is it, Jooe?”

You and this bubbly little girl are holding hands and walking into the cafeteria. “Sky blue, it’s my favorite, what if someone took it...” concern coats her tone, it makes you a thousand times more determined to find it.

“Don’t worry, we’ll find it, you’re with a professional sweater detective Jooe,” You give her hand a reassuring squeeze and draw a little smile from her. It only takes a few questions to get her to retrace her steps. She finally finds the table she sat at while her dad ordered her fold and it was right there. It’s just a sweater, but she’s so happy.

”I told you we’d find it,” You’re relieved she found it, now you can get your coffee, “I’m just gonna get some coffee, then we can go back up to the room.” You lead her to stand by you when you walk up to the counter. A protective arm around her shoulders as you order two small lattes. They come out quickly and she begs you to carry Jungkook’s, you’re afraid she’ll drop it, but you give her a chance.

“Okay, but be careful,” She walks right beside you, both hands tight on the disposable cup, you open the door for her to walk in and she beams.

“We found it,” She walks up to Jungkook, handing him the cup, “and we brought you coffee.”

“Thank you guys,” He looks up at you, his eyes sparkling.

“I’ll be right back, I have to make a phone call,” You look to Jungkook to reassure him that everything is okay. But you got a text from your older sister Layla. Call me. She rarely reached out like this so you decided to give her a call, hoping nothing was wrong

“Hello,”

“Hey, Y/n, how are you?”

“I’m fine, what’s wrong? You texted me to call, what’s going on?”

She sighs, “I need a favor,”

“What is it?”

“I need someone to watch Lily, I’m in your part of town and I have to go see her dad.”

“Layla,” You message your temples, “I’m not in town and I don’t know if I can watch a baby right now, I’m with my b-”

“Please Y/n, I can’t call mom, you know how she is with him,”

“Okay, okay,” You cut her off, looking down at your watch to see if you can make it home before 11, “I can get home around 11, bring her by 11:30.”

“Thank you! Thank you, I’ll see you then little sis,” She sounds relieved, and even though this wasn’t apart of your plans, you do feel good about helping her out. You type up a quick message to tell Jungkook that your visit has to be cut short. Hoping he sees it, you walk back into the room and give his family a kind smile.

“I’m sorry to cut the visit short, but I have a little situation that came up with my sister’s baby, so I’m gonna have to go,” Jungkook stands up, sitting Jooe where he once sat with her tablet and promptly kissing her forehead and telling her he’ll see her soon.

“Oh, we understand Y/n, I’m just glad I was able to meet you,” His mom reaches to give you a hug goodbye, she whispers, “take care of him for me.”

“I will,” You notice that Kev had stepped out so you weren’t able to say goodbye to him, and you have a feeling Jungkook is glad.

“I love you mom, call me if anything changes,” His mom kisses his cheek, relishing in the rare affection she gets to show her son.

His family loves him.

When you get to the car, you can see relief overtake his body, knowing his mother is in good health. This time he drives, and now he gets to assist you with your family situation.

“So, what’s up with your sister?”

“She needs me to watch her baby,” You lean against the window, pressing your temples, “she’s having baby-daddy issues, but she won’t say it,”

“Hm,” He nods, knowing how that can be according to some of his friends, “how old is the baby?”

“She’s five months or six months old, something like that, I was supposed to go out to help Rosie pack for her new apartment but I guess I’ll have to get there later,” and you were really looking forward to that.

“Oh, she’s a young baby,”

You can’t help but giggle, “Aren’t they all,”

“Yeah, but I mean like, she still needs her mothers milk and she probably is just- I don’t know, small?” In the midst of him explaining the difference between a baby and a young-baby, your eyes flutter shut and you fall straight to sleep. The gentle hum of the engine lulled you to sleep. When he looked over, a grin came to his face—even thought you fell asleep in the middle of his talking, he loves you.

For some reason, you’re stressed.

“Jungkook, you don’t have to stay,” You told him that a hundred times, telling him he was supposed to be conditioning today but he insisted, “I got this.”

“I don’t have to go until late,” He’s laying on your couch, a black tee-shirt on, showing his beautiful arms and the tattoos that graced them. He’s drawing one for one of Yoongi’s clients tonight. Yoongi has his own tattoo shop, where it smells like weed and you’re sure drug deals happen in the back. You want to go lay with him, but instead, you're in the kitchen trying to clean your stress away on the stainless steel. “I’ll stay for a while, you went with me this morning,”

“Just know that you don’t have to,” You mumble, that’s when you hear the doorbell ring, “she’s here.” When you yank the gloves off, you go to the door and take a breath before opening it.

“Hi, Y/n,” Layla walks right in, giving you a big hug.

“Hey,” You smile, eyes filling with adoration when you see your niece in the car seat, “hi Lily,” You lead Layla to sit the car seat on the couch where Jungkook was waiting to be introduced.

“Layla, Jungkook,” You gesture to him, “Jungkook, Layla.”

“Hi,” He flashes a sweet smile, “nice to meet you.”

“Oh hello, nice to meet you too, “ She nudges your arm, giving you gossiping-girlfriend eyes. “Y/n didn’t tell me you were so handsome,”

“Yeah, well, must’ve slipped my mind,” You laugh, the most in-genuine laugh he’s ever heard, “did you bring her a few changes of clothes? Bottles? Formula?”

“Are you her mom, or am I?” She laughs, handing you the baby bag. “Everything’s in there, she should be hungry in a few minutes.”

“Okay, will you be back to get here tonight? I have plans tonight so-”

“Yeah, before 7,” She’s headed to the front door, “thanks so much for watching her.”

The door closes, and just as quick, Lily starts to cry.

“She’s crying,” Jungkook moves closer to her pink car seat, hesitantly moving her seat to look at her increasingly red face. “do you want me to-”

You rush over to pick her up, “It’s okay Lily,” cradling her against you, “Auntie Y/n is watching you while mommy takes care of some business,” You walk around, rocking her a little, then you remember she’s probably just hungry. His eyes are wide, watching you hold the little girl to cry to calm her

“Jungkook,” He shakes out of his daze and looks at you, “can you warm her a bottle? Just run it under hot water for a minute or so,” You point to the baby bag and take a seat on the couch. He gets up promptly, finding the bottle easily and taking it to the kitchen.

He dries the bottle and brings it to you, “Thanks,” You sit her up, her curly brown hair a little smashed on one side but still cute. When you bring it to her lips, her crying ceases and you breathe in relief, Jungkook sits beside you, leaning on your shoulder and watching the TV.

“Hopefully she’ll nap after this,” Her big brown eyes look from you to Jungkook every few seconds, “look at her hair, it’s so curly,”

“Yeah, it is,” He smiles, looking down at your niece, “she’s adorable,”

It’s not long before she finishes her bottle, you burp her and put her back in the seat so she can nap. Surprisingly, she doesn’t fuss, and you leave her and Jungkook on the couch so you can go to the table to finish the essay that you forgot you had.

He’s awoken by a cry. In his many years with Jooe when she was a baby, he often woke up to cries. He groggily opens his eyes and shoots up to see what was wrong with Lily and to see where you went.

“Hey,” He reaches down the lift her small body into his completely contrasting hands, “it’s okay, don’t cry, shh,” Naturally, he bounces her gently, feeling bad for her inability to express her sorrow, “what’s wrong Lily-” That’s when it hits him, “Oh,” He sighs, “I would cry too.”

With her in one arm, he grabs her baby bag, dragging it across the couch. Once he finds the changing mat, he lays it out and lays her on it. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen a baby turn so red, she looks like she’ll set the house on fire if he doesn’t hurry up.

“I know, I’m sorry,” He takes out the diapers, wipes, and gloves, “I haven’t changed a baby in years, give me a break,”

After dodging her kicks to his hands and relieving her of the dirty diaper, she’s cleaned up and the color is coming back to her face.

“Damn,” He triple-bags the diaper and gloves and takes it to the trash with her in his other arm, “I think I did a pretty good job, what do you think?” He smiles, proud of himself for being an ideal babysitter in his eyes, even though she’s still crying a little bit.

“Where is your aunt?” He drops the bag in the trash and then looks around for you. When he finds you, your head is on your textbook and your computer screen was black, you fell asleep doing work. He’s found you like this many times after skate practice, cramming for assignments that you procrastinated on.

“Let’s let her sleep for a little bit,” Resisting the urge to wake you, opting for taking Lily to the couch so she could chill in her seat. He turns on his game counsel that he left over here and makes himself busy.

Lily was quiet for the most part after he gave her a pacifier and she found a dangling thing on her seat—she’s good now.

Suddenly, you feel paper stick to your face and your eyes fluttered open.

“Jungkook?” You shoot up, wiping your face and looking around. “How long was I asleep?” You quickly walk over to the living room, looking at your boyfriend and your niece having a fine time without you.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” You sigh, taking a seat between Jungkook and Lily in her seat, “I was trying to write my paper.”

“You’re fine, I changed her and everything,” His eyes are still glued to the TV and you grin.

“Wow, thanks. You’re a good babysitter,” You sigh, dropping your hand into her seat and she grabs one of your fingers, “I guess I should order some takeout, what do you want? Pizza?”

“I wish I could stay baby,” He leans back and sighs, “but I gotta go, Yoongi’s expecting me at the shop, he wants me to finish up a sketch for a client of his.”

“Oh, then I’ll just make something for me,” Your eyes follow him as he gets up, grabbing his keys and scrolling through his phone for a moment, “hopefully Layla will pick her up on time so I can head to Rosie’s,”

“Yeah,” He gently rubs Lily’s little cheek, his hair dangle over her when he leans down to smile at her, “bye Lily, be good for your aunt, okay?”

You giggle. “I didn’t know you were such a softy for babies,”

“She’s cute, kinda makes me want one,” Your expression must’ve looked shocked because he quickly covered himself, “I’m joking, I’m not daddy-material, I can babysit, but my own kid? I don’t think so, we’re both a little too messed up for that,” He just laughs.

“Yeah,” You nervously let out the breath that you unconsciously held. He can’t blame you for your reaction, you’re both young with lives that just don’t work well with stability. And you love Jungkook and he loves you, but jokes like that are merely just that, jokes.

“I’ll see you later,” He leans down to give you a kiss, pressing your lips with a grin.

“Okay,” You withdraw, your smile fading a little but he doesn’t notice. When he leaves, your eyes linger on the door and you swallow.

You have an aversion to a lot of places he goes, but you have a special dislike for Yoongi’s tattoo shop.

“Lily,” You look at her and sigh, “I guess it’s just you and me.” You switch on some random TV show and sit back, you just hope her mom isn’t late this time.

When he pulls up to the shop, his usual parking space in the back being there just as he expected, he sees Yoongi talking to some girl at the back door. She’s a frail little thing, hair bleached as white at humanly possible, mascara heavy even from this distance, and tattoos covering her legs under fishnet-stockings and very short shorts. He watches as Yoongi talks to her, he looks upset, brows furrowed even under his hair covering them.

Her eyes are dark and whatever she’s saying is making Yoongi place his hands over his face. She looks like she might be defending herself. After a few seconds, she shows him her middle finger and storms to her car. Pulling out at an ungodly speed. He kindly flips her off and eyes her until she’s out of sight, that’s Yoongi.

Jungkook finally decides to get out of the car and Yoongi leans against the back door, waiting for him to walk over.

“Hyung,” He grabs his art bag and locks his car, letting it beep twice before leaving it, “sorry I’m a little late,”

“You’re fine,” Yoongi sighs, tired eyes gaining a little bit of life when he sees Jungkook, “I’m sure you saw the shit I just had to deal with.” Yoongi opens the door so they can both head inside the well-kept shop, the door shutting behind them.

“I wasn’t gonna mention it,” But he was admittedly curious, “but who was that,”

“A pain in the ass,” An artist he hired about a month ago, she’s got talent but she’s a complete mess, “she was selling dope out of the shop, drawing junkies back here at all times of the day. I’m not letting her fuck up my business, I had to fire her.”

“That’s tough,” Jungkook nods, clearing his throat when he takes a seat at his normal spot in Yoongi’s backroom slash office. “So, the sketch is rough, I’ll refine it and you can tell me if you want to add anything. Who is it for again?”

“Agh,” Yoongi groans, now deciding to reveal the truth, “I was going to keep it a secret until the last second, but I guess I’ll tell you.”

Jungkook furrows a brow, “Tell me what?”

“It’s for Jimin, he wanted a new tattoo but he wanted the design to be a surprise,” Yoongi shows Jungkook to the area he can sketch at while Yoongi cleans up his needles and wipes off the table, “I told him I’d have it drawn up by my best artist,” He looks at Jungkook, “that’s you.”

“Seriously? In that case, I know exactly how I should finish it, he told me of a tattoo he was looking at not too long ago,” Jungkook smiles, glad he knows the person who’s going to have this tattoo, “it’s small, I imagined it going on the biceps or the ribs maybe? Not sure yet,” He sets up his tools to start finishing the design.

The shop is bustling with clients, artists, like always. Yoongi pretty popular with the underground scene, the punks and rejects seem to gravitate to this place. Including himself. He pops in his earbuds because of the loud conversations going on in the front.

Without him noticing at first, Yoongi slips out the back door.

After an hour or so, Mingyu, one of the artists walks in and Jungkook takes out an earbud to greet him. He’s got more tattoos than Jungkook and his hair is electric blue and he used to drag Jungkook into all types of stupid stuff. He’s been close to puking out his organs on several occasions—they laughed a lot about it but he never smoked with him after that.

“Kook, long time no see,” He leans in the door frame, “I saw you at the match last night, you’re always the talk of the night on Tuesday Night Brawls, congrats on your win.”

“Thanks,” Jungkook pushes his hair back, propping his arm on the desk to look at him, “I didn’t see you,”

“I had some activities to attend to so I had to leave early,” Mingyu’s activities probably entailed a female going to who knows where to do who knows what, “I heard you went to Jimin’s for a little party, any fun stories? I didn’t see many groupies with you guys,”

“Man, I don’t do that shit anymore,” Jungkook goes back to the drawing, “I’m kind of in a relationship,”

“Oh, me too,” He giggles to himself, “but we like to keep it open, it’s not exclusive, ”

“Mine is,” Jungkook affirms, this bias towards one individual catching Mingyu off guard.

“Aw, someones softened up,” Mingyu nods, “then I guess you probably don’t want to go to Milo’s Club, I have a friend there who’ll hook us up if you know what I mean.”

Milo’s is the spot for avid clubbers of any rank, potheads, college kids—anyone and everyone looking for a good time.

“Ah, I don’t know,” Jungkook shrugs, “maybe,”

“Well, some of us are headed over there when we close up shop in about 30 minutes, if you change your mind feel free to join us,”

Tempting.

Going out wouldn’t hurt, you’ll be at your girlfriend's house so he’d be going home alone anyway, he reasons with himself. As long as he doesn’t get carried away, he can indulge a little bit, can’t he? Yeah, he was just going out like he used to, nothing bad about that.

Layla finally came to get Lily and just as soon as she came you went to the grocery store to get a dessert to bring, you were feeling a little peckish. When you knock on the door, you can hear Rosie’s footsteps approach the door.

“Hey girl,” Rosie smiles, pulling you in with a relieved sigh, “oh, you brought food?” She peaks into the bag that you take to the kitchen.

“Yup, cheesecake,” You walk into the apartment and see Yuna, and Harmony here to help as well, “thought it’d be nice to have something indulgent.”

“Thank you Y/n,” Yuna speaks up from her wrapping a vase in bubble-wrap, “Rosie is working us to death, we need a reward.”

“I’m sure she is,” You laugh at Rosie defending herself as you open the cheesecake and take out paper plates and forks, “sorry I’m a little late, I was babysitting for a little bit.”

“Aw,” Harmony speaks from her comfortable spot sprawled on the couch, “who’s baby?”

“My sister’s, she needed to meet with her boyfriend, they had to sort some stuff out,” You put generous portions on each plate and brought them with you to the living room, “he’s being stupid.”

“That sucks,” Rosie looks u from her cheesecake, “is it custody thing?”

“I don’t even know, she won’t say,” You find yourself scooping a piece of cheesecake into your mouth, “Oh, I also met Jungkook’s family this morning.”

“How did that go?”

“It was fine,” You sigh, “his little sister called him last night, told him their mom’s appendix had ruptured, and you know him he got super worried and I did too. He doesn’t have a good relationship with his stepdad, they don’t see eye-to-eye on anything. But I think it went okay, his mom and his little sister seemed to like me, the stepdad too.”

“That’s good, I know you were worried about him letting you in on his family life,”

“Yeah, he even helped me babysit for a little while,” You smile at the thought, “it was really cute.”

“Oh my gosh,” Yuna giggles, “tattooed, earrings, leather boots, and ripped jeans Jungkook with a baby? How cute,” Everyone makes a mental picture of it and their hearts melt, “he seems like the type now that I think about it.”

“I fell asleep and when I woke up, he had changed her and they were on the couch together,” You smile at the thought, “it was sweet. He was talking about how cute she was, he said she made him want one.”

“You’re lucky,” Harmony looks up from her phone, “my ex couldn’t take care of a cactus, let alone a baby.”

“It’s silly, but there’s this thing I have where-...Well, you guys know the stuff I went through with my birth mom, she was a mess. And when she tried to get me back when I was in elementary school, it was a nightmare. Jungkook didn’t have it easy growing up either, it just makes sense that he’d say we’re both too messed up for a kid,” You sigh, “we’re both scarred by our parents. But I still don’t know why he’d say that...”

The three of them give you an odd look, “Say what? That you’re both too messed up for a kid?”

“Yeah,” You frown “why would he say he wanted on if that’s how he felt about us?”

“He was just being funny and obviously flirting with you,” Rosie shakes her head, “most girls would find that charming,”

“He said he was joking,” You reveal, “but damn, I’m not that messed up...”

“You mean you two have never talked about kids before, not even out of fun as a couple?”

“Well,” You rub your arm, embarrassed that they all think your reaction is ridiculous, “no...Is that a normal thing?”

You’re being ridiculous—is that what they all thought?

“Uh, yeah, Y/n,” Yuna takes everyone's empty plates to the kitchen, “chill, he was just being a guy. Maybe you can talk to him about it-”

“No, it’s not that deep,” You reason, “he went to Yoongi’s shop tonight, where all his up-to-no-good friends are...The people there do a lot of crazy stuff, there’s always some drama. That’s what I hear at least, I’ve never even been there.”

“Yeah,” Rosie chimes in, “but You trust Jungkook,” you assumed it was a question so you nod, “so chill out, and wrap these spatulas. I have to get half of this done before I pick my parents up from the airport in the morning, my mom will go neat-freak if she’s the one helping me.” She laughs, handing you the rags to wrap it in.

You should trust him.

So why don’t you?

The music is so loud, it almost hurts—but it’s so familiar, he knows the blaring speakers well. All the smells, the people wearing close to nothing just to get a fleeting moment of attention. He was once a happy giver of that attention. Hell, it was happily given to him at one point. As soon as they walked in, Mingyu was whisked away by a beautiful girl and he dragged Jungkook with him.

“Aren’t you glad you joined us?”

Mingyu simpers, throwing back his second shot before his lips were pulled to the girl's mouth. Her lips were so pink, they were big too and he wondered if they were real. Jungkook just watched, his shot still untouched until he felt the need to down it like his life depended on it and walk-off. The other guys who decided to join were off at the bar and Yoongi went off to a personal room.

Jungkook was standing up against a corner, arms crossed and eyes surveying the room. Unbeknownst to him, there was a girl watching him from the dance floor. She was wearing a skin-tight sequin-covered dress that the lights hit, her eyes were set on a target and she was planning her attack.

After a few minutes, Mingyu signals Jungkook to follow him into one of the personal rooms, where the magic happens. The purple lights from the ceiling illuminate the room in the dreamiest ways, the leather booths surrounding the room are shiny and comfortable when they sit.

“San,” Mingyu greets him, taking a seat with that girl still under his arm, “what’d you have for me tonight?”

“The usual. I didn’t know you were bringing a friend,” He looks at Jungkook, surprised to see him here without Jimin, “good to see you, Jungkook. What’ll you be having?”

“Depends,” Jungkook takes a seat across from Mingyu, “I might pass.”

“Oh, come on,” Mingyu removes his hand from the girl's thigh to grab his wallet, tossing him a joint and a lighter, “here, take this and then see how you feel. As for me, San, I’ll take the usual, one for my lady-friend too.”

Jungkook stares down at the thing in his lap, taking it in his hand and using his other to light it. This is harmless, he mentally counsels himself with a deep inhale and slow exhale.

It’s not long before his head is floating and his body is slowly dissipating into thin air. His eyes are half-lidded and he feels good, relaxed, but deep inside there’s a quiet longing—he pushes it down in favor of another puff. Through blurred eyes, he watches Mingyu and the girl take something, he doesn’t know what.

“Now, you know what you want?” San speaks up, standing as if he just came back from somewhere. “It’s on the house, call it a favor for an old friend.”

Jungkook laughs a little bit, seeing that he’s already feeling like he did in high school, sneaking off into clubs to do this. “Give me something mild, I can’t go too crazy,”

“I know just the thing,” While San is going through a case, Jungkook is leaning on his knees, watching to make sure whatever he’s about to take isn’t some heavy-hitter kind of stuff. He pops the pill and sits back to let it take full effect. 30 minutes until euphoria, that’s what he used to say in his mind before consuming this stuff because that’s how long it normally took for hin to really feel it.

Mingyu whispers something to the girl, she tugs down her dress and scurries out of the room with a giddy smile.

He’s teetering on the edge. So close, too close. The joint he had is still sending vapors in the air from the ashtray, he picks it up and finishes it.

Warm, and a little dazed, his eyes follow Mingyu who’s giving San a wad of cash before the drug dealer runs off. Mingyu’s little friend came back but Jungkook doesn’t register the people she brought with her, he’s high in the clouds right now while scrolling through his phone, wondering what you’re doing. Something smells really good all of a sudden, like flowers soaked in spices. He looks up from the phone and there’s a woman standing in front of him, he furrows his brows.

“Hi,” She’s standing in front of him, that same girl with the sequin dress and long brown hair, “I’m Kendall, you’re Jungkook right?”

“Yeah,” He stares her down and she takes a seat next to him.

“I hear you’re a boxer,” She’s giving him her full attention, “I bet you’re good,” She puts her hand on his thigh, feeling nothing but hard muscle and she shivers when his legs spread out comfortably.

“I’m okay,” His bland answer doesn’t please her, she places her hand on his shoulders to feel how loose they've become.

“Mh, I can tell you’re more than okay,” She giggles, face getting closer to his. It’s evident that he took something, his pupils are huge and his hand's borderline tremble when she gets close. “your arms look so strong, and your tattoos are so-”

“What do you want?” He deadpans, his body feeling jittery and warm from the effects of the crushed pill.

“Well, I thought we could have a good time,” She boldly moves to sit on his lap, her thighs warm but not right, not yours. “you look like you could use one.”

“I- I can’t,” He pulls her arms from around his neck and pushes her off, causing her to frown.

“What? You have a girlfriend or something?”

“Yeah,” He leans back once again, legs spread and now irritated that you’re not here for him to sink his finger in, “I’m not fucking that up.”

“You have a wife and kids too?” She bites back.

He rubs the back of his neck, he’s sweating. “No, but-”

“Then I don’t see a problem,” She kisses him without warning and he doesn’t react quick enough to push her away. There’s a smirk on her face when she pulls back and his doe-eyes lose a bit of their sparkle, “no ring, no rules. That’s how I see it.”

“Don’t,” He pushes his hair back, mind reeling with the need to cuff himself to something so he can’t move. He wipes his mouth, “I can’t mess up what I have because of some whore-”

“Call me what you will,” She cups his jaw with a smile, “but you can’t take lover’s speed without a lover, loosen up.”

* * *

“I think we’re all finished up for tonight girls, thanks for helping me out,” It’s been a few hours and you guys were more focused on the reality TV show than parking the silverware, but you got it done.

“No problem, Ro,” You look down at your phone, it’s getting late.

“Are you sleeping over, Y/n?”

“Um, I can, it is getting kind of late,” You got up to go to the bathroom and the three of them went straight to their phones.

From the couch, Yuna’s eyes go wide and she shows Rosie her phone. Harmony grabs the phone so she can see why they’re looking like they’ve seen a ghost, “Oh my God, is that-” She whispers, “Is that Jungkook?...Does Y/n know-”

“Do I know what?” You walk out of the bathroom, brows furrowing when you hear them trying to be hush-hush. “Why are you guys looking like that?”

“Have you seen Sean’s story?”

“No,” You frown, “what happened?” You quickly grab Yuna’s phone to see what she’s talking about. At first, you don’t know what you’re looking at until you see it.

It’s a group photo and Jungkook’s in the back, he’s in the back with some girl smothering his face with her own.

“When was this posted?” You ask calmly, biting your lip to keep from throwing the phone out of the window

“20 minutes ago,” Yuna answers, “at Milo’s.”

“Okay,” You give the phone back to Yuna and you grab your keys.

“Y/n, what are you doing?”

“I’m going to that club.”

Rosie stands up with you, “Hold up, we’re going with you.” You tie your converse and the three of them follow you on your hunt.

Don’t do this to me Jungkook,

don’t do this to me.

* * *

“My bitch told me you threw her out, Min, what the fuck?”

“Your bitch was selling coke in my shop, I had to let her go,” Yoongi stands up, “you told me she was good for a job but she was bringing crackheads to my shop.”

“You told me you’d give her a job, you’re telling me you just fired her? Why didn’t you give her a chance? You used to sell-”

“Yeah, I used to. But I don’t anymore.” Yoongi leaves the room.

Meanwhile, Jungkook’s on the other side of the club with a loud group of guys, downing shots like he’s back in college.

“Jungkook,” Yoongi grabs his arm, and his pupils are blown, his cheeks are red, “I’m heading out, can you drive yourself home?”

“Yeah, I’ll be okay,” Jungkook gives him a reassuring look, “I’m good, Hyung, I’m so good.”

“What did you take?” Yoongi looks at him for a moment, not trusting Jungkook to go anywhere himself, “Hey, call yourself a driver, okay?” Yoongi pats his back before leaving the stuffy place.

When he walks out the front door, he could have sworn he saw you pass him with a group of girls. If that’s true, then Jungkook’s in for a world of trouble.

This environment is foreign to you, you’ve been in it before but it’s always been too much, too loud. Your outfit doesn’t help you blend in at all, your gray converse, shorts, and t-shirt are quite contrasting to what the other girls are wearing. Your body is shaking, the people who are shooting you weird looks don’t matter to you, you need to see him.

“There he is,” Harmony points to the corner where Jungkook is leaned up against, he looks like a train-wreck. His hair is so disheveled and he looks jittery, anxious, but he’s smiling. How did he manage to do that to himself in just a few hours, “if you need back up, we’ll be over here.”

You nod, putting your best foot forward to walk a clear path towards him.

Only when you tap his shoulder from behind does he turn around to look at you. The high, the clouds are evaporating and he’s starting to feel the sweat on his brow, I’m sweating? For a moment he thinks you’re a hallucination, there’s no way you’re actually here.

He reaches out to touch you but you slap his hand away. That’s definitely you.

“Y/n,” He rubs the back of his neck, “what are you doing here?”

“Is this what you do when you leave? You come here to cheat on me and do drugs,” You bite your lip, when he just stares at you with dark eyes, “answer me.”

“What’re you talking about?-” You shove your phone into his chest.

“What do you call that, Jungkook? She’s all over you!” Tears start to prick at your eyes but you push it down, you try to. “What are you trying to do to me?”

He stares down at the phone, his chest tingling and heart aching at the sight. It was taken moments before he got up and left, she got on him but he willed himself to leave her. He was out of it, couldn’t really remember any details. “I took something, and I’m not-...” He gives you back your phone, dragging his hands down his face. “I wouldn’t cheat on you, I didn’t-”

“Don’t fucking lie to me!” You yell but the music is so loud, it sounds like you’re speaking at a normal volume. “After everything I’ve done for you, after everything we’ve been through, I can’t believe you would do this to me,”

“Hey, hey, what’s going on?” Some guy with electric blue hair barges into your conversation. “What’s wrong, baby girl?”

You look at him, judging by his looks alone and the way he physically sides with Jungkook, you can piece together that they know each other.

“Um, was I talking to you?” You snap, looking at him as if he just grew a second head.

“No, but you look like you’re giving my friend here a hard time. I’d appreciate it if you calmed the fuck down, no one likes a-”

“And I’d appreciate it if you’d mind your own business. I’m his girlfriend, who the fuck are you?”

Mingyu cracks a nervous smile, “Oh shit,” He looks at Jungkook who’s finding it hard to stay still, “so, you’re the exclusive. I’m sorry, I may have set him up with a playmate for the night, but can you blame me? You obviously weren’t gonna join him,” He shrugs, “he just wanted to have a good time.”

“Y/n, I took ecstasy, I smoked a little bit, ok? That’s it, I didn’t do anything with that girl,” Jungkook glares at Mingyu, ”she kept coming on to me but it didn’t go anywhere-”

“You’re high, you don’t know where it went.” You turn his face to see red lipstick spotting his skin, “Look at your neck, it went somewhere...”

His hand comes goes there and he remembers the forced kiss before he ran out of the private room.

“Y/n, please it’s not what it looks like,” He let’s out a grown of frustration, grabbing your wrist, “let’s talk about this somewhere else.”

“No,” You pull away, “don’t touch me,” He grabs continues to pull you towards the direction of the bathroom, “Let go! Let go of me-”

You jerk away and mistakenly bump into a fast-walking individual, he was trying to get Jungkook. Oops.

“Tell Yoongi that’s what it costs,” that’s what you hear and then the guy runs off.

When you hear a scream, it seems like the whole club stops and people start backing away.

Why are they screaming?

Only when you feel the wetness dripping down your knee do you realize why they were all looking at you. You stumble, placing your hand on your thigh when Rosie comes running up to you with tears in her eyes, her hands are trembling. “Y/n, oh my God-”

When you look up, Jungkook is shouting so loud that you can hear the strain in his voice and he’s running. There’s blood all over your leg, your leg is shaking.

“We need to put pressure,” One of the girls takes off her flannel and ties it around your leg, “give me a belt, somebody!”

Some random guy gives her a belt and she wraps it around your leg tight. “Y/n, we’ll take you to the emergency room down the road, we need to get you out of here,” Rosie tries to help you to your feet but you wince, “can you stand? Harmony, help me!”

“Yeah, I think I can- Ouch!” You cry-out when they pull you up a little too fast, “wait, stop! That hurts-”

When they finish, Yuna and Harmony pull your arms to wrap around their shoulders, they look like their struggling. Jungkook suddenly breaks through the crowd of people, hair sweaty and eyes frantically scanning over you. He wants to throw up, but he can’t right now.

“Give her to me,” Jungkook extends out his arms so he can take you from the girls but Rosie guards you from him with her whole body, “what the fuck? Move,”

“Haven’t you done enough?” She frowns. “We can handle this, why don’t you-”

“Come off it! I’m not about to let you three fucking drag her out of here like this, she’s gonna bleed by the time you get to the fucking door!” He moves Rosie out of the way, “Let me carry her.” Neither of the girls argue when he grabs you from them and lifts you into his arms.

In a matter of seconds, you’re outside and the cool air makes you cringe, holding Jungkook’s shirt tighter in your fist. “You okay?” He whispers, glancing down at you when you give a weak nod.

Yoongi was outside at his car talking and his heart sinks into his stomach when he sees your bloodied leg in Jungkook’s arms. Among the other people leaving the club, you and Jungkook were the last people he thought he’d see.

“What the fuck happened in there?”

“Some guy was trying to stab me but she got in the way,” Jungkook explains in a panicked tone, “he said to tell you this is what it costs,” When Rosie opens his back seat door, he eases you to lay on the leather seats and gets back there with you.

“We’re taking her to the emergency room,” Rosie answers before closing the front-seats door and cranking the car up.

“Son of a bitch,” Yoongi pulls out his keys and gets in his car. That’s all he says before pulling out of the parking way faster than he should have.

Jungkook is sitting where your legs are so he can keep it propped up, “You’ll be okay,” He pants, the effects of the drug still running it’s course in his system, “does it hurt a lot?”

You nod, stomach-turning at the smell of your own blood. You mumble, “I feel like I’m gonna throw up...”

He looks down at his hands, tattoos now colored red from your blood. “Me too...”

Jungkook and Rosie brought you inside while the girls waited in the car.

“Excuse me,” Rosie goes to the front desk and Jungkook goes is walking not far behind her, “my friend was just stabbed, does she need to sign in or something? She’s bleeding a lot-”

As soon as Jungkook came into their line of vision, the sight of your bloodied leg kicks them into an urgency.

“Bring her here,” A woman with lilac scrubs says something to a few people before she’s walking Jungkook to the back and directing him to a room, “sit her there, miss, do you feel dizzy at all?”

Jungkook hesitantly lays you on the little bed and two more people come into the room, both dressed in scrubs—he’s asked to step back.

“Just a little,” You bite your lip when they start removing what was covering your wound, it looked as bad as it felt, or maybe it’s just really bloody. They start taking wiping your thigh of the blood that covered it. You look away, not wanting to see the damage.

“Sir?” A woman finally gets his attention after the third time calling him, when he looks at her, his eyes are a dead give away. That, and the smell of marijuana and liquor on him. “Have you taken anything tonight? You don’t look so good,”

He disregards her question with a question of his own, “...Wh- where’s the bathroom?”

“Down the hall to your left, but-”

He runs out of the room before she can say anymore and he passes Rosie on his way there.

He bursts inside and locks himself in a stall. Immediately, he falls to his knees and painfully expels whatever he had consumed tonight into the toilet.

His throat burns and his heart is pounding.

This was always the worst part.

“So, how long will I need the crutches?” You look at your now-useless leg. “I’m an ice skater, I have competitions to prepare for, and-”

“Two weeks at the very least, but I would recommend no strenuous activity for a month at the least. With how close the wound was to the artery, you’re lucky it’s not longer.” The nurse smiles, probably thinking she was lightening the mood.

It’s just and the nurse, Rosie ran to the restroom and Jungkook hasn’t come back since he brought you here.

“So,” Rosie walks inside, “how long are you on the crutches?”

“Two weeks,” You frown, staring at them from the corner of your eyes, “this would happen to me, wouldn’t it?”

“It could have been anybody,” Rosie sighs, “I’m just glad you’re okay.”

“Miss, you have a visitor by the name of Min Yoongi, do you want to see him?”

You nod

After a few moments, she opens the door and Yoongi walks in.

“Y/n,” Yoongi comes to your side, guilt eating him up that he was the cause for this. “I’m sorry this shit had to happen to you, I don’t-”

“It’s not you’re fault, okay? Don’t beat yourself up about it, I shouldn’t have been there...”

“Did Jungkook leave?”

“He ran to the bathroom earlier, I haven’t seen him since,” Rosie says that with a bite in her tone, and soon enough he’s walking inside the room, “that’s probably for the best, he’s the last person you need right now.”

Get it together.

He cupped water in his hands, swished it in his mouth and spit it out. When his eyes meet the mirror, he wanted to slam into it, shatter into a thousand pieces for bearing his face. He does his best to wipe the blood from his arms and hands with soap water and a napkin. He also wipes the lipstick from his neck, scrubbing at it unnecessarily hard until its gone. Nausea has faded enough for him to stand up and face you. But the thought alone makes him want to disappear. He can’t stay in this bathroom forever, even if that’s what his mind is telling him to do.

“Miss,” the door opens again, “The man from earlier, he said he’s your boyfriend, he wants to see you, are you alright with that?” you hesitate for a moment when you look at Rosie who’s sitting in the chair next to you, you nod.

The woman leaves for a moment and Jungkook walks in, he searches for you as soon as he walks in. He doesn’t acknowledge Yoongi or Rosie. He walks to your bedside and looks at the white bandage wrapped around your thigh.

“What did they say?” He’s not as pale as he was but his eyes are a little red. “Are you okay?”

“She’ll be on crutches for two weeks, but she can’t skate for at least a month,” She turns to Jungkook, “the wound was close to the artery, an inch difference and she would’ve bled out, no thanks to you.”

Silence befalls the room and even though she said that to make Jungkook wake up, Yoongi is the one who feels so bad about it. “I have to go, guys,” Yoongi suddenly speaks up, “feel better, Y/n, I’m sorry about all of this,” It’s not his fault, you remind him of that before he leaves.

“We just need your insurance,” The nurse comes back with a wheelchair within seconds, “the pharmacy you’d like your medicine sent to and you’re all set to go,” She helps you into the chair and rolls you out.

As they check you out, Rosie looks down at her phone, it’s almost two in the morning. You notice she looks tired as you hand them your insurance card, and she still has to pick up her parents in the morning, you don’t feel right keeping her here.

“Ro, go home,” You gently grasp her hand, “you have to pick up your parents in the morning, it’s getting late.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m fine, thank you for everything, tell the girls I’ll call in the morning,” You know it takes everything in her not to stay but she knows it’s late and even if you’re both pissed at him, he can at least take you home. You get her to agree and you’re left with Jungkook and the nurse as they take you to his car.

“Are you okay, hon?” The nurse asks softly as Jungkook watches her help you into the passengers seat. You know what she means by that. You know how this probably looks to her, it doesn’t look like you’re in a good situation. But you reassure her that he’s going to take you home.

When he gets in the driver's seat and the nurse is back inside the ER, you can feel him staring at you. He swallows, hands gripping the wheel incredibly tight, “Look, I’m sorry this happened, I-”

“Take me home,” You cut him off, looking out of the window with the crutches at your side, “just take me home...”

The drive is quiet. Painfully quiet for him. He pulls into his normal parking space and when he gets out, he comes to your side.

“Let me help you,”

That’s the first thing he says to you, hand extended as if you’d actually take it. You’re not skilled with crutches, you shouldn’t have been so persistent on getting and going to the door without his help, but you were.

“I don’t want your help,” You mumble, hobbling inside after he opened the door with his key. He flips on the light and you sit on the couch to try to kick your shoes off, “you should go home,”

“Y/n, please,” He closes the door behind him, “I know what you saw, I know it looked bad but I didn’t cheat on you.”

“Yeah, but you let some slut put her hands on you,” You forget trying to take off your shoes and you use your crutches to try to get to your room, “y’know, if you wanted to break up with me you could’ve just said it. If I’m not enough for you, you should have just told me.”

“You know you’re enough for me, don’t even talk like that. I don’t want to break up, why the fuck would I want that?” He follows you into your bedroom, easily catching up because you can’t get anywhere fast now.

“I wasn’t thinking straight, but my mind was clear enough to know we didn’t have sex,” He’s in your face, “I’m sorry that it looked that way, okay? Is that what you want to hear?”

“No, don’t tell me what you think I want to hear,” You sit on your bed, again trying to kick-off your shoes but failing miserably, “just leave me alone.”

“You can’t even take your own fucking shoes off, you need help,“ He kneels down and you don’t fight when he takes them off for you, “don’t you trust me?”

You scoff, grabbing your crutches and trekking to your bathroom to get away from him, “Why should I,” You attempt to close the door but he stands in the doorway, “let go of the door.”

“No,” He’s getting upset now, you can feel it in the way each word leaves his mouth like a curse, “stop walking away! I fucking love you, that’s why you should trust me.”

“Wow, with a reason like that,” You let out a sarcastic laugh, standing in your bathrooms doorway. “I guess I should forget everything that happened tonight, huh?”

He rubs his temples, the headaches he’s had from an hour ago now acting up. “You know what? If you didn’t have trust issues, you could see that I’m telling you the truth, I swear to god I didn’t do anything.”

“I know I have trust issues,” You’re sick of standing in the bathroom, “after all the times I’ve been screwed over, you’ve given me plenty of reasons not to trust people.” You move past him, bumping into his shoulder.

“Hey,” He tries to grab you but hobble away from him and towards your bed, “would you stop walking away?! I’m trying to talk to you!” When he sees that you’re close enough to your bed, he takes the crutches from you and sits them on the floor behind him.

“What the hell?-” Your mouth hangs open in shock as you grapple to hold on to him so you don’t fall. “Why would you do that!”

“That was the only way I could stop you from walking away.” He towers above you, height and large frame reminding you that he can overpower you easily. “Don’t you see I’m being honest? Tell me why you’re acting like this.”

“You know I was hurt in my last relationship. Do I really have to spell it out for you? I dated for months before I realized I was being played. I couldn’t see what was happening right in front of my face, do you know how that felt? I felt so stupid,” You squeeze his arms, “I swore I’d never let anyone make me feel that way again.”

He breathes in and out, trying not to fall apart at your teary confession, he chants in his mind, don’t cry, don’t cry.

“I can’t go through that again, I love you...” You hold on to him, leg throbbing and tears falling down your cheeks in single drops, “Don’t make me look stupid for loving you.”

That hurt.

“I won’t,” he wishes he had stayed home—he wishes he would have stayed with you. “I won’t, I promise I won’t.”

You gasp when his hands cup your face and he kisses you, open mouth sealing over yours without warning. You fall victim to this every time, you try to listen to the voice in your head that tells you to push him away, but how could you? You grab at his wrists to keep your self grounded and he holds you tighter, making you breathe nothing but him. His mouth goes bone dry and he feels sweat dripping down his back, he’s burning up and his heart is beating out of his chest.

“Jungkook,” You manage to breathe out, and you plop down on the bed, “you’re sweating like crazy.”

“I’m sorry, I feel like I’m gonna pass out,” Suddenly, he rips off his shirt and tosses it somewhere, now revealing the sheen of sweat that’s been under his shirt.

“Are you okay?...What you took, have you ever taken it before?...” Worry shakes your voice.

“Yeah, this used to happen sometimes, give me a second,” He disappears into the bathroom and you hear the water turn on. Somehow, you managed to stumble over to the bathroom with the help of the wall. Jungkook is standing at the shower, the water on cold as he dunks his upper body under it with a groan of relief.

You watch as he grabs a towel from the rack and dries his face and hair. You watch as he dries the water off his body, face still red but he looks better.

“I’m sorry, this is one of the reasons I stopped using that shit,” He sits the towel on the counter, heavy ids landing on your frame in the doorway. For the first time, he sees the bandage on your leg in his right mind and it pains him.

Noticing that you weren’t using the crutches he threw away earlier, he comes to your aid. “Your leg, don’t stand with it like that, you need to have it propped up,” For the second time tonight, he picks you up and carries you to you out of the bathroom. “It must hurt.”

“It does,” You hesitantly unwrap your arms from his neck and he lays you down, “it hurts a lot.” With expectant eyes, you watch him circle around your bed to get to your drawers. He pulls out a shirt and some shorts, sitting them besides you.

“I’m sorry,” He mutters, handing you the shirt so you can put it on while he helps replace your bloodied ones, “I wish he would have stabbed me, I fucking deserved it, not you.” He’s absolutely right.

His hand rests on the bandage and he looks up at you, eyes so tired. Reaching over you, he takes one of your pillows and props it under your leg, making sure it's elevated at a comfortable angle. He sits on the edge of the bed, one arm across your body, his eyes shutting when he presses his forehead to yours. Desperately, he kisses you again. His damp hair dangles on your forehead and his necklace drapes over your neck the more he leans down, its cool on your skin. His warm body engulfs you, his sheer heaviness making you weak. He has a special ability to surround your senses and drown you in his energy, and you sink happily.

“I’m sorry,” He whispers, “I hate that we always end up like this, I shouldn’t put us through this...” Brushing your hair away from your face, he leans, in his nose a tinge red and his eyes teary, “but when I’m with you-...When I have you, I don’t have to see myself anymore and it feels right. I hate myself without...” Tears stream down his cheeks and a few drop on your cheeks. His chest heaves against you when he shakily breathes in. He drops his head in your chest like a child and starts to cry.

“Jungkook,” You run your fingers through his hair and your eyes get misty when a pained whine leaves his mouth.

“I-” he hiccups against your t-shirt. “I’m sorry that this is what it cost to love me, but I’m not shit without you. I’m nothing with you...”

Sitting here, patching myself up, crying over what's left, 'cause without you I ain't shit, but no pressure. Guess I gotta learn my lesson.

#Jungkook boxer!au #jungkook scenarios #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #jungkook smut #jungkook fanfic #bts smut #bts fluff #bts angst #bts boxer!au #jungkook x you #jungkook x reader #iceskater!au #quarters #bts imagines #bts scenarios

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captainshazamerica · 3 years

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The redhood nightwing fight scenes look like they're gonna be dope af like thats all I'm thinking about how awesome the fight scenes are (hopefully) gonna be (I'm already finding it difficult to see this jason as redhood cuz he's like literally a child but I dunno what age he redhooded in the comics so??)

I had no idea tim was even gonna be in it !?! Can I please get some kind of recognition from the batboys that they actually view each other as brothers and family! 😢

Someone needs to kill the joker It'd be kinda interesting if old bruce killed joker and it'd be nice if that was the last thing he did as batman buuuttt then again it'd be a nice touch if dick killed joker for jason, it would personally be disappointing if joker was just let live not gonna lie i really want bruce to kill him and that be the reason he gives up being batman because he failed to protect jason and then he broke his no killing thing so he just hangs up the cape

we are getting FEAR TOXIN yassssss cue awesome nightmare ish fearscapes (no idea if that's an actual word but that's what I call when you get to see everyone's fear hallucination)

Kory I love you, I do ship dickkory however I feel like she's too good for dick and should marry me instead lol I wanna see how donna is still alive? and I know there's people who are like ughh hank dawn go away already but I really freakin like hank and dawn as characters even though their suits are ridiculous did they break up last season I can't remember? Hank needs a break poor man someone give him a blanket and a hug and let him sit the fuck down everybody leave hank alone

That line where babs is like don't try be your father and dick is like excuse me what you saying there Commissioner Gordon, that will never not be funny 😅😅😅

I ain't in love with this show it has so much potential it could be so lit but I do like it anndd they got suits now whoop!

Wait is this my previous Titans anon? (The one where we ranted about Jason, or the one thinking they hadn’t seen S2 but went to watch it and realized they had? Or are you the same person? xD )And if so are you the same one who asked for the comic and fic recs? Just wondering in terms of if I’m talking to one person or not hahaha

But ahh I got so excited when I saw I got an ask about this 😍

Omg the nightwing red hood fight already got me so stressed lol. It looks great but ahh angst! But I think Jason is like 19ish in most versions when he comes back? Though tbh I forgot what age Jason is in this , I’ll have to see when i rewatch it soon. Curran, the actor, is actually 23, he just looks super young/short. He got pretty buff though. But yeah, that is an unfortunate thing wi the them rushing it already but also, I’d rather have it like this than if they were gonna spread it out through the seasons then it gets cancelled or something (poor Gotham s5, RIP). I think he was the PERFECT robin jason Todd though. Like I love his acting and portrayal of Jason(“Titans are back bitches!” classic Jason), he just is young looking and short. Gosh I still wanna know if they are going with the Lazarus pit for Jason or not! But like that also begs the question of whether they are doing a time skip cause normally Jason is dead for like 2-3ish years, but it doesn’t look like it from the trailer.

And yes, I’ve been looking forwards to Tim!!! While the trailer didn’t show it, the actor was on set a lot over these last couple of months (I’ve been keeping up with their instagrams xD) and seemed super close with the cast! I can’t believe the first look we got if Tim was him nearly crying, though that look already won me over, I love him and he is my son now. But RIGHT! That’s all I want, is the bat bros platonic love, gosh dang it😭 that’s all we want DC😭

BRO! OLD MAN BRUCE KILLING JOKER WOULD BE FREAKING PERFECT. Dang it! Now I’m gonna be so disappointed if that doesn’t happen 🤣gosh it would be perfect, and normally I would be like it’s Bruce, they would never do that, BUT, this show does that kind of “edgy” stuff anyway so if it’s ever gonna happen(without the Batman who Laughs plot line happening(which would make a perfect dc animated movie btw)), it would happen in this show, especially with what was shown in the trailer with him giving Batman up. Man, now my hopes are up for that xD though I wouldn’t mind if Dick killed him. I would be shocked though if they had the balls to actually kill off joker though, dc seems to refuse to do that :/

Omg I squealed at the scarecrow part omg. Dr freaking Crane is a big reason I spiraled down this entire fandom tbh. Like literally a year ago I got obsessed with him for some reason and that led into the Bat hole where I am currently WAY deeper than I ever would have thought 😂 and while I’m not hyper fixated on him anymore, I still love him so much and is my 2nd fav rogue, and it mainly started with Jonathan 🥺 we barely even see his face and I am already in love with the casting, the voice is perfect. And I LOVE when villains have to help the heroes, that is like one of my fav tropes ever omg, I was really hoping they were gonna do that to him. I hope he is in it for more than one episode tho. And oh lordy, like those poor Titans need even more trauma in their lives and now fear gas is in the equation. Oh no, I bet poor Gar is gonna get hit cause they just love to torture that poor boy. And tbh I hope the fearscapes(perfect word for it) will be better than most of the Gotham ones, those seemed a tad cheesy tbh

Lmao about you and kory😂 she is too good for him, but also, this Dick needs someone who can kick his ass and get his head out of his martyr butt 😂 tho tbh, I’m still not fully sold on Dickkory, Like I don’t hate it but I don’t LOVE it in many versions, like they can be cute but no strong feelings, the Original Teen Titans cartoon is like the only exception, I def ship those 2

Omg I low key forgot Donna “died”😂🤦🏻‍♀️ I feel like I knew it wouldn’t last so it didn’t have a big impact on me lol. Like I had/have a feel raven is gonna bring her back. I wanna know what happened to Rose/Joey! Like are they not gonna be in it at all? Especially with Jason going off the deep end?!

Lmao, hawk and dove’s suits😂 I think they did break up, I’ve only seen the series once through tbh, planning to rewatch before S3 tho(and try to force my mom to watch it tho she is convinced everything DC is too dark for her lmao), yeah, I don’t mind them, like I don’t want the focus on them but like they deserve to be happy/need a break, omg yes! That boy needs to be wrapped in a blanket and given a break, that grumpy boy is TIRED. Let him rest!

Lmao! That babs line is so great😂

I’m just so excited for all this live action Batfam content, considering the live action movies NEVER give us Batfam 😭(we aren’t talking about the 80’s/90’s live action robin lmao)

Also so sorry this was so long 🤣🤦🏻‍♀️

#long post #Titans #titans season 3 #Titans S3 #Titans speculation #speculation #predictions #Meredith gets an ask #anon #ask #asks #Jason Todd

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steponmepinkjun · 3 years

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I NEVER FINISHED MY STORY OMG. ok so i left off at being too proud to tell my friend she was right and kpop fucked hard. the difference between u and me is that i’m too good of a liar. too good. i kept up the “i hate kpop it’s cringe” facade for ALMOST TWO WHOLE YEARS, I SHIT YOU NOT. why? bc my dumb ass, extra ass, dramatic ass self thought “ok if i’m gonna have to deal with the embarrassment of admitting i’m wrong, i better do it in such an extra ass way it’ll knock ur socks off so hard that YOULL be the one embarrassed not me.” the original plan was to learn the entire choreography to bts dope, bc it’s the song that she told me to listen to and inevitably the song that got me into them, but later switched to bts fire bc i saw too many of those “choreo matches w any song” videos, and then her birthday party came up. and here’s the real kicker. her birthday is April Motherfuckin Fools. so it would be So Perfect for me to reveal my kpopism as a birthday present And a april fools prank in one. so i was Set on the Reveal being on april 1st, but the day rolls around and god that choreo is so fucking hard and i am Not a dancer. never have been. so i abandon that and go ykno what… i’ll do it Next Year. BC MY BITCHASS WAS LIKE NO THE MOMENT IS TOO PERFECT TO DO IT ON A NORMAL ASS DAY ITS GONNA BE ON APRIL FOOLS ON HER GODDAMN BIRTHDAY OR NOT AT ALL. a year rolls by, i’ve told most of our friends except her and they’re all in on it, i’d made so many subtle kpop references to her without her realising they were fully intentional and had too many scares where she almost figured me out but i lied my way out of it, and i’d given up on showing off with choreography bc i couldn’t make that shit look good. i’m not a dancer. i am, however, a rapper, and a damn good one, so i inhaled the agust d mixtape and decided i’d just rap the eminem of kpop’s anthem at her face. in korean. and change the lyrics at the end (if u haven’t listened to agust d, the bridge repeats “i’m sorry” a lot) to “i’m sorry i kept this from u for so long” and “i’m sorry i actually ult got7 not bts” (this was like the april after skz debuted ok i was holding onto got7 for dear life knowing full well skz we’re going to convert me smh) and the best part? she never saw it coming. her official present was a cd with a bunch of kpop on it but she thought it was just a personalised mixtape for her so i told her to play the first song out loud and she knew the song Instantly. it has a long intro so she was like “i guess u did listen when i recommended u this song!! i knew you’d like it since u like rap so much!!” and then i started rapping and i shit u not. she started SCREAMING. like the initial reaction was her jaw dropping and then instinctively covering her mouth but when i kept going and she realised i wasn’t fucking around she just fucking screamed like a banshee. at the end during the sorry bit i threw off my jacket to reveal a got7 shirt on the inside and she fell off her chair and started rolling around on the floor. needless to say it was every bit as satisfying as i thought it’d be LMAOOOO afterwards her ass was like “I CANT BELIEVE U HID THIS FROM ME FOR OVER A YEAR” and when i tried to explain my ego couldn’t take the “i told u so” she was like “you know i wouldn’t have made fun of you for it right? i would just be glad you’re not hating on my boys anymore” so basically i’m a big dramatic fool and she was always too good for me.

don’t mind the weird spaces here my ipad is being all fucky wucky w me rn. damn sad to hear ur sideblog experience didn’t go so well, i’d have shown u the cool side of the fandom if i knew 😤😤 leading u thru the cursed halls of kpop stan tumblr like a sketchy tour guide that’s actually 3 small raccoons stacked on top of each other like a trench coat, like “over here we have the fanfic writers that honestly need to publish a book, over here we have the gif makers that are responsible for my entire camera roll, if we take a quick swerve past the death threat anons and the twt fanwar screenshots - mind ur feet bub the 14 year olds were tryna make a grab for ur ankles - ah here’s the holy grail of shitposts, you might be here for hours, to the right we have the weird aussie side of the fandom that projects our childhoods onto chanlix but also all the members as we decide what their life in australia would’ve been like, and down there is a secret trapdoor to the blogs w endless random headcanons that will make you laugh, cry or blush depending on if the author woke up and decided to choose violence today. enjoy your Stay!” but then again i’m not so active on tumblr anymore (ngl you’ve become the highlight of my tumblr experience these days, interaction wise,) so maybe all my Local Hotspots are inactive now. i know a bunch of them are, it’s sad. “i don’t fw stan twitter for the same reason i don’t hang out in meth dens” oop. guess i’m a meth addict. no but i get u i rly do, it’s a hellhole out there, but the fact that things get shared and spread a lot easier than on tumblr and how short most things have to be (therefor keeping up w my adhd attention span without having to resort to the mental torture that is tiktok, with the added bonus of not always needing headphones.) that i just. couldn’t leave if i tried. maybe i should try being active on tumblr again but it’s a dying site in comparison.

“their music doesn’t consistently hit for me as much as skz” i’m sorry we can’t be friends anymore. what. what. you don’t dramama ramama ramama hey? you don’t feel a little jealousyyyyyy, naega anin? you don’t shoot out, shoot out, shoot out, or aremdaeun love killa love killa? you can’t be your hero du du du du du du du du du dududu? u disappoint me. literally like everyone i know who likes skz music likes mx music like it’s a rite of Passage. they’re kindred spirits, monsta x music is like skz’s music’s cool but mildly heterosexual older brother. neither of them know what a bad song is it runs in the family. and both their music runs in my VEINS. whenever i describe my music taste they’re always the first two that come to mind, skz being my number 1 bc they are my best boys but mx bc of the Flavour. pls listen to the entire the code album then get back to me 😤🙌 ok but fr ur so right they are 7 of the finest men i ever seen (yes i say 7 bc i’m including wonho cause he deserved better and i’ll die on my ot7 bullshit.) like don’t get me started on them either LOL i LITERALLY downloaded that one insta video of changkyun working out his back n arm muscles w his tattoo showing bc i needed that shit saved for Science. they could do Anything w me like frfr. yes vixx is the bdsm contract group i’m telling ya they wildin. or at least they were. it’s been years since their last comeback idk what they’re doing anymore tbh. and yeah that makes sense, savouring the hyperfixation i feel it, but also i’m so attached to skz that i never let it die. like i hyperfixate on other things and other groups but i will Always go back to skz cause they’re my homeboys. hell, they’re my home. being a predebut stay i’ve spent more time w skz than most of my actual family members at this point. but that’s just me you do u boo xx just know that if ur anything like me ur never letting go once skz it’s been my longest lasting fixation cause they hit like Nothing Else Do. ik i’ve already said that but i cannot stress it enough. they’re really special. i’m gonna stop here before i get all sappy and emotional bc i really love those boys so fucking much and i don’t drop the L bomb often. SIDE NOTE I WOULD LIKE TO SEE UR LIST OF GROUPS RANKED BY THORSt. i need to judge ur Taste. and omg cat&dog is such a guilty pleasure song bc the lyrics make me cringe so much bc while pet play can be fun they be doing it in more of an “i’m an innocent soft dogboy uwu” kinda way that just Does Not Sit Right with me. it comes back to the objectifying of asians that asians themselves don’t help in industries like these and maybe i’m looking too far into it when rly it is just wholesome n cute or maybe they are into some pet play shit idk idc i will bop to the song regardless but i will not acknowledge the lyrics nope.

YOURE RIGHT THO SKZ’S OPENNESS IS IN FACT, A BIG DEAL, i’ll grab them for u if u want but i found these twt threads of skz supporting the lgbt community and i just felt a special kind of happiness man like sure the delusional part of me likes going “haha they’re gay” bc my brain likes to imagine them as my polycule of mlm boyfriends bc sometimes thats what gives me the serotonin to get me thru the day ok don’t judge but also bc it’s nice knowing that yes i’ll never know them personally, but at least i can support them knowing they’d respect my gender identity and my pronouns, they’d respect who i choose to love, and that’s already more than the general public can say so shit, it is special! it’s special that they don’t treat being cishet like the norm - they constantly remove gender from their songs and speech entirely, they don’t assume all stays are female anymore, we don’t talk abt the babygirls incident cause we got babystays in the end outta that ok, and it’s just. so refreshing and important to me bc i can’t get that anywhere else!! like my semi ults are the boyz and while i love them very much and there’s no way all 11 of them are straight i refuse, i do get just a little bit sad whenever they she/her their fandom by default and call them their girlfriends n shit even tho i do still identify as a girl, i’m also genderfluid/nonbinary/transmasc, and i have a very love/hate relationship w my womanhood and rarely use she/her pronouns, cause it’s like, do you not see me? see us? the ones who aren’t cishet women? i mean i know kevin does bc he congratulated a fan who came out as nb but it’s just not the same as the openness we get w skz. like how do i trust cishets i could be supporting them as a queer person when in reality they’d call me a slur. what would i know, behind the screen? so it’s so good that skz go the extra mile to make it a safe space for everyone. this is already long enough i will reply to the second half of that ask in another message… tomorrow cause it’s 1am and i’m tired gn -felix bi anon

I'mma have to start putting these under a readmore so that i don't absolutely make everything who is still following me for some reason go totally fucking insane 😂

NDJDHWJJAHFNAKBSJSBFBHHDBDNAJD YOU HAVE NO IDEA THE FACES I WAS MAKING READING THIS, I WAS FUCKING CACKLING AND GASPING EVERY OTHER SENTENCE SO HARD THAT I SCARED THE CATS NDJWHSHSB the fact that you went "oh you want me to get into kpop? Give me a hot minute, and I'll give you a whole ass private concert for free" biduehsjdbd biiiiiiiiiiitch you're a fucking ICON, I stg I could NEVER 😂 (and not just because I couldn't find a tune if you gave me a printed set of Google maps directions and that I embody the steriotype that white people can't dance, like my sister kept sensing me tiktoks of the whole "dance like a white girl" trend going lmfao look it's you and eventually I was like "sis please this trend has me feeling like being white is a disability and these mothafuckers are being ableist 😭 also I could NEVER be that on beat so yall ain't even doin it right 😭😭😭😭"). Tbh if I told one of my friends (lol what friends, i got jokes) to get into Skz and they showed up at my bday and performed the entirety of I Got It I would simply shower them in money and go "aight everyone else go home, you are no longer needed, you are being laid off, your position has been eliminated, we're downsizing, the company is moving up and you're moving out, you are not qualified for this role any longer, best of luck with future endeavors" 😊

I think part of the reason I can't deal w Twitter is the exact reason I refuse to leave tumblr, in that I've been on tumblr since 2006 and twt since 2008, and tumblr literally has not changed at all, not even a little, whereas going from the early days of twt where there were no corporate sponsorships or ads and you had to manually copy and paste someone's tweet and @ them to retweet it, to how it is now, like 90% ads and showing me shit from the timelines of people I don't even fuckin follow n whatnot, it's just not enjoyable. Idk how anyone finds anything on twt, it confuses and frustrates me because I am old and have not adapted well to technology changing 😂 But arguably, the skz fanbase doesn't want me on skztwt anyways so like it works for both of us lmfaooo. I am old and cringey, and also still think of twt as stream of consciousness whereas tumblr is your teenage bedroom where you can decorate the walls with anything that interests you. I do really love the nonsensical kpoptwt shitposts tho fhshsbdjjss like it is a very specific flavor of mental instability that I enjoy immensely 😂 OH and also I initially misread part of that and thought you were saying you actually irl do meth and I was like 😳 WHAT DO I SAY TO THAT. HOW DO I HANDLE THIS. Like how do I express like "I wasn't being judgy of people who use substances cause I've been there but I was just being insensitive 😳" And then went back and reread it and was like WHEW, IM JUST AN ILLITERATE FOOL 😂😂😂😂 ejeywhdhrhjwbfbdjshdhdhd I spent like an hour bwign like "IS THE REASON WE GET ALONG BECAUSE THEY'RE ON METH???? WHAT DO I DO WITH THIS INFORMATION??????" hrhehshe I am literally a fuckin idiot it's fine

It's not that I don't fw them, it's more like... Okay so like there is no situation in which I am going to skip a skz song if it comes on shuffle. You will not ever catch me NOT in the mood to listen to Sunshine, if God's Menu comes on we are THROWIN the meager amount of booty meat I got hither and thither, I could be in the happiest mood of my life but if Ex comes on I will stop to SOB. And I'm not like that with most music, so mx just falls into the category of "there is a time and place." Idk why but it just doesn't forcibly grab hold of my heart and ass the way skz always does. I really don't WANT my skz fixation to ever end, but I know that eventually it'll stop giving me dopamine bevause my brain is my worst fucking enemy 🙃 like my arcana fixation is to date the longest running hyperfixation I've ever had, going on almost three years, and I used to not be able to spend every single second of every day thinking about Asra, but now... I just feel nothing when I look at arcana stuff. As you can probz tell by the fact that I hardly post arcana anymore 😂 So I know that eventually all my happiness will end, it always does, I can never stay just as obsessed with something as I was for long. I CANT SHARE THE LIST BECAUSE I DONT *HAVE* TASTE YET 😭 I'm basically just compiling a list of any group someone tells me I should look into, ranked by how strong the kitty purred upon googling pics of them 😂 My mom read my ass to FILTH over txt lmfao she was like "they're not that adorable. Maybe your standard for adorableness has gone down with You Know Who still on hiatus 🤔" bfjwhdhd like MOMMAAAAA THE LIBRARY IS CLOSED 😂 she attacks me any time I even hint at stanning other groups, she is a skz purist and stans skz only, unofficial Momma Stay of All Stays keeping me in check lmfao.

I feel like skz really do follow thru on their promise that they're a safe space for stays, it's nice to see that they hold space for anyone and everyone in their fanbase and do it in a really simple and elegant way, I feel. Like they never make it seem like "okay here are the fans and here are the token weirdos that were only recognizing to make a buck off of them" the way a lot of artists make it feel like 😑 like they don't go out of their way to act like it's some revolutionary act to do the bare minimum of not shitting on certain parts of the fandom, if that makes sense. They feel very "yeah, of course we love all our stays, this is a welcoming space for literally anyone, that's how it should be, that should be normal," instead of like "Hi fans we love you 😊 and special shoutout to you ell gee bee tee folk, make sure to buy my rainbow merch after the show!!!" you know? Like, they're the friends who would never make you feel weird or different for some shit, the friends that take the attention off you if something they know ur sensitive about comes up, instead of weirdly snapping at whoever brought the unfomfy thing up which ruins the mood and makes you feel tiwce as bad, yk? They just give off this vibe that they, and the space they create with their music, is just a genuine and chill place to be and hang out and relax and bond. I feel like they'd be the friend group that is so goofy and sweet and silly and accepting and lovely and always makes you feel loved and excited to be alive 🥺 They are all good noodles 🥺🥺🥺

#felix-bi-anon #asksteppie

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birlcholtz · 4 years

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Bittydex??? (Also your bitty/holster and bittyrans hcs were works of art)

omg. the baking duo. i don’t think i’ve ever like seriously thought about them but NOW I AM AND I LOVE IT HERE GOES

dex is originally wary of bitty for a lot of reasons but a big one is that bitty is openly gay and cute and thus firmly jeopardizes dex’s ability to stay closeted/repress everything for his entire time in college. oh boy.

but of course, eventually he’s like y’know what fuck it whatever bitty’s cool i can do this

and as he gets to know bitty, it’s almost laughable how different they are, but dex eventually kind of internalizes the correlation between baking and being openly gay (for bitty) as a kind of... causation? like, maybe he can get more confident about himself if he embraces baking too. is this good logic? i actually have no idea dex is tired let him live

so anyway that’s what has him, only about a month into his first semester (listen everyone on the team is so goddamn supportive of bitty and dex sees how much he loves being here and!! he wants that too!!! so yes he gives up on the whole ‘repress’ thing very fast), poking his head into the kitchen when he hears bitty opening and closing the fridge in a pattern that means he’s getting out ingredients and asking if he wants help

bitty is all in favor of literally anything dex does that isn’t fighting with nursey and he’s also glad that dex is seeking him out, because come on bitty has heard from nursey about the adventure with the samwell republicans sticker and even though it’s gone now he can’t help being a little concerned?

so dex asking if he can help with the baking is good for both of them honestly

bitty immediately sets him to cutting up fruit and they talk a bit as they work but mostly it’s just kind of a comfortable quiet (not silence because bitty’s got some music playing, but quiet is different entirely)

bitty eventually finds out through some subtle comments on dex’s part that his family is absolutely rampant with toxic masculinity and homophobia and that for dex, literally baking in and of itself, not just slice and bake cookies but actually baking something from scratch and spending time in the kitchen willingly, is an act of rebellion

it’s a lot easier for dex to find out that bitty’s relationship with his parents is a tiny bit strained because he’s not out at home, because bitty talks about his mother so much that it’s easy to infer. sometimes he tells dex about something his father did that his mother told him about. he never seems to talk to his father though

so baking becomes a kind of... alliance, i guess? the two of them are united. bitty does have his suspicions about why, perhaps, dex is so keen on getting to know bitty in particular-- his comments about the homophobia in his family make bitty even more suspicious-- but he doesn’t say anything. that’s not for him to ask about.

(chowder and nursey know that dex bakes with bitty a lot. chowder is glad because it means the baked goods get produced faster and he’s also glad that dex is spending time with bitty because he always seems more relaxed afterwards and it really does help stop him and nursey from fighting. nursey is intrigued because he’d thought after taddy tour (and after the first couple weeks of their first year) that dex would avoid bitty like the plague. he’s curious enough to accept that maybe dex has hidden depths. that also helps with the fighting.)

when they go home for winter break, dex and bitty agree to contact each other if they need to vent or just talk to someone they can relax around. neither of them has any legit emergencies, but they do text a lot and call each other a few times. bitty sends a picture of a pie, dex responds with ‘god i wish it’s so weird not being in the kitchen all the time. my brother gives me weird looks’ and bitty immediately starts compiling recipes for them to make as soon as they’re back at samwell

dex fixes the oven for the first time of many and bitty is so thrilled that he just kind of throws his arms around dex, who freezes for a second before letting himself hug bitty too (honestly i don’t remember if this happens before or after winter break but either way. same thing applies)

and in spring semester dex becomes fully aware that he has a problem. which is that spending time in the kitchen has changed from a hope that it’ll help him feel able to be more open to just wanting to see bitty, and be around bitty, and hear bitty’s voice and the casual endearments he throws around like they’re nothing and the way he puts a tense hand on dex’s arm while they’re both watching the oven to see if it’s going to actually preheat, and his smile and compliments when dex does something right and the way he flicks water at dex right after he washes his hands to get him to laugh, and the way he slides on oven mitts with the same calm efficiency that he steps onto the ice for warmups and dex is fucked. okay?? he’s fucked. the whole reason he’d been wary of bitty in the beginning was because he was worried about falling for him and guess what??? he did

but at the same time, dex can’t make himself shove it down. he’s still not out at samwell, but he’s getting to a point where he feels like he might be comfortable with that. bitty is probably tied with chowder for being his closest friend. dex can’t find it in himself to push all of that away.

as for bitty, he’s gone from being pleasantly surprised that dex is a fairly quick learner in the kitchen to looking forward to baking with him. dex always relaxes when he’s there, and bitty is sure that dex doesn’t know this, but he’s beautiful when he’s not so goddamn stressed. but at the same time, bitty knows dex is Going Through It with regards to sexuality-- he’s gone from being suspicious that maybe dex isn’t straight to knowing it but still waiting for dex to say something himself. so he keeps those thoughts to himself but it’s nice to see dex smile. especially when bitty knows he caused that

also dex keeps fixing the oven over and over and bitty knows that dex bakes a lot too so like. he has selfish reasons to fix the oven? but dex will LEAP to fix the oven if something is wrong with it and when he figures it out he always gives bitty this relieved smile that bitty is finding makes him increasingly flustered.

in the midst of all of this, dex is consulting with the upperclassmen about the best kind of oven to get bitty for his birthday. it’s a little over a month away, but between jack, ransom, and dex, they’re probably going to be incredibly overprepared because it’s what they do

in early april, dex pushes a bowl of sliced cherries over to bitty and says, ‘i’m gay.’ and bitty leaves the cherries where they are and hugs dex as tightly as he can, because he knows how long it’s taken dex to be ready to say that and he knows that in not very long, they’re both going home to places where they don’t know if they can ever say that

they stand there like that for a while, and dex doesn’t cry, but he almost does, and that’s when he says, okay, let’s bake this pie. and bitty agrees. (when it’s cooled, they eat almost half of it themselves before telling anyone else there’s pie)

baking together feels just a tiny bit different after that. not bad-- not bad at all. just a bit different. dex coming out changes their dynamic a little, because it means bitty finally lets himself acknowledge that he’s kind of got a huge crush on him, and then bitty basically can’t stop the endearments from coming out of his mouth. he tries to keep it to things he also says to the rest of the team-- mostly ‘hon’ and such-- but dex catalogues every sweetheart that slips out, and he knows he blushes, and both of them can’t help but feel that they’re dancing around something

then bitty’s birthday arrives, and dex installs the oven as quickly as he can while still double- and triple-checking things, and he’s just standing up and packing his toolbox back up when bitty and nursey enter the kitchen, and dex can’t help but blush when bitty looks at him like he hung the moon

and then bitty hugs him and dex hugs him back so hard that bitty is lifted off of the ground, and the rest of the team looks at each other like are you seeing this too??? because literally none of them noticed anything except that dex likes baking almost as much as bitty does. nobody realized there might be another reason lol

and both of them, independently, think that this might be the moment. but then the moment passes, and then they’re taking finals and getting ready to go home for the summer, and dex and bitty make the same promise they did over winter break but there’s more of a sense of urgency about it.

at first, they call each other once a week, just to keep up. bitty learns dex has taken to hanging out with his high school sort of-girlfriend, who’s got super short hair now and introduces him to hayley kiyoko’s music, and his family probably thinks they’re dating again but mostly they just wander around when neither of them has work, or they hang out in each other’s rooms (with the doors open, because of household rules). in july, she whispers to dex about her girlfriend in new hampshire and dex, that night when both of them are at home, texts her about his... well, bitty. whatever he and bitty are to each other (he also shows her a picture of bitty and she’s like oh he’s cute and dex is like yeah he really is)

the first person dex sees when he gets back to campus that august is chowder, who’s on his way to the haus after walking with farmer to the volleyball house. they’d been on the same flight back and have spent the whole last week together, along with plenty of other visits and trips with each other over the whole summer, and dex’s whole chest aches with how much he wants that. and yeah, it’s different for chowder and farmer, who live an hour away from each other in california and can see each other basically whenever they want, but chowder talks about how much his sisters love farmer and how their families got together for the 4th of july and dex aches.

they get to the haus, and everyone who’s arrived has congregated in the kitchen, where bitty is making a strawberry rhubarb pie dex has made with him at least five times. it’s second nature to come into the kitchen and head straight for the counter. bitty passes him the filling ingredients without a word, but with a smile, and keeps going. (the rest of the team trade looks)

but dex feels daring. all that talking to chowder about farmer has made him envious. so later, when most of the team is in the living room chatting about their summers and bitty’s headed upstairs to plug his phone in, dex slips out of the living room, heads upstairs, and knocks on bitty’s door. and bitty opens it and puts a hand on dex’s arm almost automatically when he asks how his summer was, and maybe that’s why dex feels bold enough to say, ‘it was okay. but i missed you.’

and bitty smiles softly at him and says, ‘i missed you too.’

the next time they’re watching the oven to make sure it preheats-- the new oven is actually functional, so it’s more habit than anything-- dex feels bitty’s hand slip into his own, and he immediately looks at bitty, who’s determinedly looking at the oven, and squeezes his hand. and then bitty looks at him, and dex can’t help but smile

some headcanons:

dex is a master of identifying when someone is aiming to check bitty during a game and immediately just. getting in their way. he’s very obstinate

does dex enable bitty’s procrastibaking? more than he wants to. he’s fully aware when he gives in that he probably shouldn’t, but it’s very hard to keep bitty from doing something he wants to do

bitty always brings dex tea or hot chocolate or a snack if he’s studying or fighting with java in the computer lab. the other compsci majors are very jealous

bitty is also a great sounding board for dex when he’s trying to figure out how to solve problems. explaining the problem to someone who doesn’t know anything about coding is a time-honored tactic of programmers everywhere and bitty is always willing to listen

winter trips to murder stop ‘n shop inevitably result in bitty walking as close to dex as is physically possible. (’it’s COLD’ ‘sure it is’)

the kitchen becomes the place where people can automatically find both of them. they’re just there all the time

flannel stealing? flannel stealing. they always find their way back into dex’s possession soon enough, but not before bitty’s worn them enough that they smell like him

lardo gives her dibs to nursey because dex basically lives at the haus already anyway. he does still wind up converting the basement into another room though because he needs a place where he can get work done and any room that bitty’s in isn’t conducive to that. yes it still has a steam shower because dex is extra as fuck

with regard to fining the rest of the team, they absolutely have a good cop/bad cop routine worked out. who is which depends on the day

chowder: bitty’s officially gone mad with power. dex: yeah i kinda like it. chowder: keep it in your pants

#bittydex #omgcp #fun with rarepairs

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splendidshinobi · 4 years

Text

FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST 2003 LIVE REACT: EPISODES 6-10

back at it again with the white vans

episode 6: the alchemy exam

alrighty then

um mustang calling edward “ed” is EXTREMELY offputting

ohhhhhhh noooooo not shou tucker

FUCK

im wholly unprepared

them all being in central instead of east is low key jarring like my brain isnt computing it

alexander’s intro is basically the same

nina bbyyyyy girl u deserved so much better

ed is such a fucking nerd...chemistry club modern au confirmed

god the more tucker talks the more i wanna beat his face in

al pretending to eat by tossing a potato in his armor i-

aww theyre playing in the snow theyre so pure

wonder how long thatll last

“bigger brother” and “little big brother” and ed doesnt even get mad

ed’s birthday party????????

A MELON? ED YOURE SO RUDE

so 03 had ed’s bday instead of elicia’s...CAUSE THEY GOT ELICIA IN THE WOMB

“it’s here!” “the tea?” “the baby!” hughes is a fuck head

ok so now they’re having elicia replace rush valley baby arc

this was winry’s time to shine in fmab i miss her

if winry isnt here who is gonna birth this baby

oh my god they just realized ed can use alchemy without a circle

no wonder he’s been using circles this whole time

SO ELICIA JUST POPPED OUT????? WHAT

STUFF ALEXANDER IN THE ARMOR AND PRETEND YOURE A TALKING DOG???

“i dont think thats very funny” NO ALPHONSE IT IS NOT

THEY KNEW EXACTLY WHAT THEY WERE DOING WITH THAT ONE I SWEAR TO GOD IN THIS ESSAY I WILL

damn bradley what up homie

im so thrown off by the way theyre doing the exam omg

seriously what the hell is fuhrer bradley’s purpose right now is he even the fuhrer in this i feel like they wouldve mentioned it

oh lord ed is about to impress everyone with his clappy hands

ok so next episode is nina FUCK

episode 7: night of the chimera’s cry

havoc babeeee

im gonna marry him my himbo king

also can RIZA DO SOMETHING PLZ

“huhhhhhhhh nina” ew tucker that was weirdly gross

wonder why

cant do it cant do it

do we think jean kirstein was modeled after jean havoc slightly looks wise

was that purposeful

ill have to google

serial killer who only targets women? it cant be scar...scar drinks respect women juice

barry or slicer bros maybe? um ok

why did we start with liore if they were just gonna hop right back into the past for a huge chunk of episodes idk

assessment day??? oh noodles

AL WHY DID YOU TELL TUCKER TO MAKE ANOTHER TALKING CHIMERA ALPHONSE NO

THE NOISE I EMITTED IM GONNA TAKE A LAP

im gonna FUCKING SCREAM

ed r u writing to winry??? that’s a bit out of character for u good sir

no tucker put that baby down

im gonna fucking SCREAM

aww he burned nina’s picture thats not sus at all

SHESKA!!!!!

wait does the ironblood alchemist know what tucker did to his wife? thats kinda the vibe im getting

SCARRRRRRRR

looking like a pirate too damn

his voice sounds different is that j michael tatum

apparently not it was dameon clarke in 03 ya learn something new everyday

ew elicia has a lot of hair for a FUCKING NEWBORN

ed really is such a cynic very suspicious of everyone as he should be really

basque grand knowS SOMETHING

oh jesus oh fuck oh god please do not TOUCH THAT BABY

ed and al snuck back in to the house well u know what its for the best

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

im gonna cry again please god no

FUCKING DIE SHIT HOLE

she’s hurting? oh my god

my sweet angel

ew his eyes!!!!!!!

tucker is such a fucking failure...like look at the chimera squad and greed’s theatre troupe being the way they are. ugh it really hits how fucking unfair it is

ed was really about to split them? boy you know better

where is nina going...im hurting

ed really tried to save her in this one

SCAR KILLS NINA IN THE STREETS???????? SIR

thats different

oh snap

oh FUCK

SCAR WHY DID YOU LEAVE HER BODY LIKE THAT

THE WAY SHE WAS ARRANGED ON THE WALL THAT WAS FUCKED UP

AND THEY FOUND HER LIKE THAT???? AT LEAST IN BROTHERHOOD THEY DIDNT HVE TO SEE HER CORPSE ARE YOU SHITTING ME?

that was fucked.

episode 8: the philosopher’s stone

can yall get ed and al away from nina’s fucking MURAL

get out of the car mustang

finally jesus christ

roy mustang talking about healthy coping mechanisms dont make me laugh but alright baby boy go off i guess?

im curious about who this goddamn serial killer is though lets turn to that plot thread

r u kidding me

mustang is making ed and al take over tucker’s research?? thats actually wildly messed up

oh tucker was straight executed that’s a choice i guess

tucker and the philosopher’s stone sounds inaccurate but ok

ed please stop being mean to your brother

03 mustang has got me reaching for a fucking baseball bat on GOD

scar and edward having this conversation right now i literally cannot

WINRY yes bitch

BRADLEY WHAT IN TARNATION

JESUS LORRRRRRDDDDDDDDDDDD

alphonse shut your mouthhhhhhhhhhh

im so confused what is bradley up to

“alchemists are not cold blooded murderers?”

i mean

kimblee would beg to differ for one

whos this creepy lady

her voice sounds familiar

barry’s food shop?

the killer is barry ok got it

IS BARRY DISGUISED AS A WOMAN

I KNEW THAT WAS JERRY JEWELL’S VOICE

WELL I KNEW IT SOUNDED FAMILIAR AT LEAST

WINRY GET OUT OF THE FUCKING TRUCk

has PINAKO TAUGHT YOU NOTHING

ok so i VASTLY prefer suit of armor original manga canon barry

this is such an odd plot what in fuck

um OW the meat cleaver

im so confused this fucking plotline

oh hey alphonse nice of you to show up!

is barry still gonna become a suit of armor later on

it makes NO SENSE to introduce him otherwise

everytime i see 03 mustang i wanna beat his ass HONESTLY

literally i will shove my foot up his ass

fullmetal here we go

ed thinks he’s so punk rock

oh great scar’s seen the watch

episode 9: be thou for the people

ed you simp buying winry all this stuff my edwin heart is ascending

SIMP SIMP SIMP

“mr. elric”?? you mean MAJOR ELRIC

to be fair though fuck the military

YOUSWELL??? oh LORD

im gonna need to read a full chronology of this show

alphonse continues to be a precious angel

where’s my boy yoki!!!!!

edward you idiot don’t go flaunting your money

woof woof ed

al looks so offended by ed saying they just met

whereas in brotherhood didnt he totally throw ed under the bus???

a choice to be sure

ah there he is hello yoki

who’s the chick

shes a lesbian

yoki makes me miss my baby girl mei chang

mei where r u

WAS THIS MILITARY DUDE REALLY ABOUT TO CUT DOWN A CHILD??? oh my god

hawkeye getting a promotion yes bby girl

jesus theyre transferring them to east now OKKKKKAY thats not how it happened it the book but ill take it....just doing it the opposite way i guess

who is lyra who is she

cute some military bribery

umm lyra what the fuck did you do

lyra is a homunculus im callin it now

they definitely invented/changed up some homunculi in fact im certain they did and shes one of em. gotta be

i feel like 03 wrote ed as much more insensitive towards others than he really is...just a vibe im getting

i know he was faking for the townspeople’s sake but i still get this vibe from other instances

i mean i cant say its not “canon” because its 03 canon

anyways what a show off

i cant believe theyre going to east...fuery and breda better be there

ok finally some answers on their ages....ed got his license at 12 like normal and nina and youswell were when he was 12...liore was 15,

if they didnt flash the ages on the screen id be lost honestly

at least we’re back up to “present day”

episode 10: the phantom thief

ed saying he doesnt wanna see mustang

same

03 mustang is activating my fight or flight and im choosing fight

ed cheating at cards totally checks out

um who the fuck is this woman

what is she wearing

SERIOUSLY WHAT IS THAT CUTOUT MAAM HOW DO YOUR C**CHY LIPS NOT POKE OUT

idk but this is fem!hisoka

“hey shouldnt we talk first” after getting handcuffed??? christ almighty these innuendos

siren??????? siren is probably also a “fake” homunculus

ugh

ok so the nurse is siren

ya aint slick girly

alphonse control your crush

I REFUSE!!!! ALMEI RIGHTS

why is al’s hair so brown in this flashback anywayssss

oh its spelled psiren ope

like she’s literally a batman villain...

oh my god...............the tiddy grab. my son would never

my son is respectful

is this her homunculus tat or just a random alchemy tat

the added plotlines and original content continue to confuse and astound me every single time....

ok but if psiren really was doing this for the hospital she wouldnt be so flashy about it. like thats how you get caught sweet cheeks

girly stop flirting with this child on god im gonna fucking kick you

now shes a nun????????????????

Shes a fucking troll i hate her

im going to kick alphonse into the sun

oh great now shes a teacher

wow shes a savior. the savior of amestrian venice. greatttttt

ed looking exactly like this emoji on this gondola rn 🧍‍♀️

STOP FLIRTING WITH THE CHILD

GOD THIS IS SO BATMAN VILLAIN ESQUE

alphonse plzzzzzzzzzz she aint your girl

ok so probably not the last we see of this ding dong con artist

ok so its starting to get muddy. im scared the 03 stans are gonna come after me like i do like it and im having fun watching it but some of the plot and characterization choices are just....odd??? idk i gotta keep going though!! im sorry i just stan arakawa and her work in all her glory!!!

#carol watches fma03 #fullmetal alchemist #carol's remaining brain cells #this is fun for me and no one else #whatever i dont care about anyone else on this website anyway #this is my stupid hole

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deacied · 5 years

Text

evening sun . // one .

summary: messaging stupid things to your celebrity crush on instagram has no repercussions because it’s not like they’re going to read it anyway! obviously this doesn’t entail sexual harassment or general creepiness, but sending a meme they’d like or a picture or maybe something actually stupid like your phone number seems irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.

or the one where you dm joe on instagram and your life actually changes

warnings: none other than like fluff

word count: 1.7k

she sends the stupidest message she has possibly ever typed in her entire life (eighth grade, angsty teen posts on myspace included) to him in the second week of march. the chances were low that he would open her dm, but he had been known to ever so often answer a handful at a time, and what did she have to lose if he did answer the message? she had sent him other things before as if he were her best friend, memes that reminded her of him or funny t-shirt ads, whatever it had been that she thought might have him grinning to himself--- however, clearly the response never-received wasn’t with this particular “friend”. she didn’t really know him, and he, blissfully unaware of her existence, yet she tried weakly to get the attention of him while he received thousands of others flooding his messages doing just the same. it was just a bit of fun really. a shirt that showed a t-rex wearing mickey ears, “wrong park!“ written across it had her laughing manically to herself before sending the post over to joe. she hoped she would see him in that shirt soon.

it was a hopeless cause that, well, wouldn’t crush her if the odds weren’t in her favor. nearly a month after she had sent the stupidest message, a notification of a new text pings through her phone. a glance over to it only to be met with an unknown number loses her attention as quick as it held it. she yawns. the action comes of mainly boredom though sleepiness threatens to claw its way into dominance as the summer rain continues to pummel unto the roof, warm florida air shifting through the porch, and the novel in her hand losing focus. a nap would be good-- perfect actually.

the crackle of lightning followed by a gargle of thunder shook her out of her sleep only an hour later and back into reality. every afternoon without fail, the casual shower of rain would pass over her family home just after three as if mother nature were taking her time with her garden. florida often promised hurricanes so the thunderstorms weren’t uncommon, but this particular one wasn’t supposed to hit until thursday, and with it being only tuesday, she knew this storm would last forever now: the earlier they came, the longer and harder they reined apparently. notifications sound off at a quick rate, though she easily dismisses it as something extraordinary going on in the group chat. trekking back into the house with book and phone in hand, her free fingers pass over her dogs’ heads as she passes them to head to her room. the thought of a shower to wash away the dampness from outside was the most ideal option she possessed, however, the implied doom her mother promised of a shower during a thunderstorm was the least. more notifications go off in time before she turns off the ringer entirely and plugs it into the charger. sixty-four (jesus) messages in the group chat on discord, another twenty-one from the same group on instagram, and god knows how many more on snapchat, but the one, singular cluster of notifications tucked at the bottom that held her interest had her pausing with head tipping in interest: another message from the unknown number.

lower lip curls between teeth as brows furrow an inch together. finally clicking on the messages, she feels like she might throw up as her eyes follow the pixels. holy. fucking. shit.

FROM unknown 11:18 am: It’s super dangerous giving your phone number to strangers on the internet you know? FROM unknown 11:20 am: I tried to call and kind of chickened out. I got nervous and I’m sorry. FROM unknown 11:43 am: Oh my god, did you really shoot your shot and just leave the court?

she has to read the messages at least eight times, take a screenshot, send it to her brother, and have him confirm she’s not having a stroke before she can go back to the originals with an intent to reply. thumbs hover over keys making absentminded shapes as she breathes deeply, loudly, anxiously trying not to have a whole mental breakdown. the message directly referenced her messages to none other than the boy from jurassic park, the bassist of bohemian rhapsody, the very angry baseball player of undrafted. there was absolutely no way that this was actually, truly, literally joseph francis mazzello iii. couldn’t be. nope. not happening. she doesn’t know what to reply back with for a good long moment, taking a second to collect herself and open up instagram to confirm for the hundredth time now that this is who she thinks it is.

the dm’s screen welcomes her, exhale escaping lowly as she clicks on joe_mazzello’s chat. he hadn’t replied -clearly, she most definitely would have received a notification for that or else instagram would have a very angry woman on their hands- but he had opened it. the time read 3:56am two weeks ago when he read them. her head falls backwards as the mental math floods hurriedly through her brain, trying to understand: so he had called a week after reading them apparently, and then waited another week before engaging contact again. he... he had been thinking about this for a while; it wasn’t just a spur-of-the-moment ploy to entertain a fan. god, she might throw up actually this time. thumbs navigate to open the texts from the unknown number again just to make sure they hadn’t magically dissolved into thin air. a slow exhale. one more final time she moves over the keys.

TO unknown 12:56 pm: who is this? TO unknown 12:57 pm: if this is who i think it is i’m gonna Lose My McFreakin Mind

she nods to herself as they send--- vague enough that whomever was on the other side wouldn’t think something strange was going on no matter what the outcome turned out to be. it had happened once where a friend texted the wrong number instead of her, asking if “mc fuckhead” was there. (that was an incredibly fun inside joke to explain.) head tips to the side slightly, hopping her train of thought from joe mazzello and him genuinely thinking of you to how strange every inside joke must sound to people outside of the inside. another vibration of the device jerks her back to the matter at hand, unable to help her heart thumping uneasily.

FROM unknown 1:26 pm: Hi, I’m Joe Mazzello from Jurassic- I mean, Bohemian Rhapsody and you’re watching Disney Channel! FROM unknown 1:26 pm: Thank God you’re a multiple text person too FROM unknown 1:27 pm: Please don’t Lose Your McFreakin Mind! FROM unknown 1:27 pm: Wait. FROM unknown 1:27 pm: .....Is this (@ y/ig)? Did I just fuck everything up with an actual wrong number?

suspicions couldn’t get more confirmed than that. her next set of texts goes out rapidly and without much second thought, a stupidly huge smile graced on her face that probably made her look like a maniac--- but really, if any person’s celebrity crush had texted them wouldn’t they have the exact same reaction? actually, now that y/n thinks about it, she’s being really, really calm. the internal screaming stays internal -thank the lord- though her cheeks already ache from the face-splitting grin she currently wears.

TO unknown 1:33pm: if i’m (@ y/ig) then wouldn’t you be @joe_mazzello? no? just me? ok TO unknown 1:33 pm: but hi yes i’m y/n ??? holy shit ??? what the fuck ??? TO unknown 1:34 pm: definitely losing my mind rn TO unknown 1:34 pm: but also 👀 real talk i was 👀 actually asking you 👀 out TO unknown 1:34 pm: like if you wanted to hang out 👀 haha

as soon as the last one sends, her heart drops with fear. fuck, what if the actor just wanted to do a fan a favor and answer her dm just for shits and giggles, or, best (worst?) case scenario he wanted to online-befriend her. she can very easily lose the one single chance she’s gotten and--- god, yes, definitely going to throw up. she sends another message in a haste, praying to whomever was up above that her last text actually saved her ass. he responds in actual record time, the girl tucked up on her bed unable to help the excited and very, very, very ugly squeal she let out as she starts reading the messages.

FROM joe omg 1:36 pm: Interesting.... I’ll have to accept your proposal. We meet at dawn! FROM joe omg 1:36 pm: But you’re in Florida right? I think I read that on your account, I hope I didn’t just pull that out of my ass. FROM joe omg 1:36 pm: I haven’t been to Universal down there in God knows how long and I was planning to go at the end of the month funnily enough FROM joe omg 1:36 pm: If dinosaurs and King Kong and Harry Potter and whateva are your thaaaang

an anxious groan soon follows-- of course this was the alternating year she had gotten a disney annual pass instead of a universal one like last year, and upon further inspection of prices, her bills due, and her bank account, it was a couple hundred dollars she definitely didn’t have to spend. she sets her phone down to calm her now raging anxiety, skin heating up and palms sweating profusely until she fists her comforter in hopes to dry them. asking an actual rich and famous person for financial help just to hang out with them was forcing her eyes to prick with tears-- she had to find something else, right? they could work something else out and she was just overreacting. it takes her verbally saying “you’re crying over universal, chill the heck out” before she comprehends and truly relaxes, tension melting out of her back as a slow breath falls from anxiety ridden lungs.

TO joe omg 1:42 pm: i actually love universal but i have a disney pass right now if maybe that was something you wanted to do TO joe omg 1:43 pm: idk if you’ve ever been to disney world but its so much better than disneyland if i’m honest lmao i’ve gone to california once and i went and i wasn’t super impressed TO joe omg 1:43 pm: i mean it was really cool cause it was the original disney but rides and attractions wise you know what i mean??? anyway im rambling wtf

the conversation rolls with no further lulls in topics to talk about, one in the afternoon soon turning to one in the morning and her eyes threatening to droop closed. with a final goodnight text the pair decide to resume conversation in the morning, and lord, did she have something to excitedly scream about then.

#okay uhhhh heres the actual first chapter #joe mazzello x reader #joe mazzello #joe mazzello fanfic #john deacon x reader

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raindrop-rouge · 7 years

Text

How well do you know your best friend?

Original post here. Answer these questions about your bff, your tumblr bff, or just anyone you want to show a lot of appreciation on here to!!!!

I was tagged by @chiruchill and will answer the questions about her (and tagging her back!!!). Tagging @shulkie @milleandra-nebula @crying-abt-fictional-people , uh chiru also tagged @glassesgirl0401 and @gray-x-natsus-matching-hip-scars but it didn’t seem to work? idk guys feel free to spread the love but also feel free to ignore!!! (I HIGHLY recommend getting the questions from the original post, I rambled for MILES in every single question you don’t wanna read the below trust me)

1. What is your best friend’s dream job, and why? Man, idk that you’ve ever blabbed about something specific, like I know you’d love to run a café with me, or a library with your mom, or any kind if small store like that... Obviously I know you were ready to invest a lot of time and effort into teaching too... Any job that would give you enough time and self management to allow you to spend time with your dogs really ahaha

2. What is their biggest pet peeve, and why do you think that is? The main one is people being 1) messy and 2) loud. A few weeks ago I would have just said “well you’re considerate and wish they could be too”, but I said I’d be brutally honest about this and girl... I read something a little while ago and I am genuinely worried your hyperawareness of everyone around you stems from something more specific, but we can talk about it whenever

3. What is their favourite TV series (live action)? LMAO GO AWAY I GET THE MESSAGE I will watch Arrested Development asap

4. What is their favourite TV series (animated)? Ahaha you’ve recommended a lot of quality comedies to me over the years, do you have an ultimate fave though? I know there was that group of school girls comedy gdi I watched it but forget the name >< welp

5. What does your best friend value most in life, and why? (Do you think they value most what they say they do, or something else?) Holy shit ok this goes right back to a thing the guys were talking about earlier. I’m gonna say your dogs, like you do say you do :p If we’re talking values in people/ ways of life... What the guys brought up was that you say you only want a simple life with just what we need, but... well, I guess we all know none of us have ANY idea what a minimal life is like, so I’d say what you mean by that is, you do value the life standard we currently have, where we never have to worry about a solid roof over our heads, food, and enough money left to support your pets. So yeah, my answer is 1) your dogs, and 2) the kinda life where we can support them x)

6. How would you describe their style, and how would they describe it? Colorful (but that’s how us French see all Scandinavians tbh), comfortable, like effortless but still cute? You’d probably agree it’s colorful but then say it’s not “stylish” though XD I think you just really like cute things but muuuuch prefer comfort first

7. If you were to decorate a room for your best friend, what would it look like, and why? !!!!! Aaahhh I’m a shit decorator with no taste, but I’d keep it minimal cause that’s how you feel best! A massive bed for you and your dogs, maybe nice tall lights you can reach from the bed but light the room well... A bookshelf... A pretty big desk... I’d want to add lots of plants and pillows, but idk if you’d want that clutter :/ Colors would be white beige and either pastel green or pastel pink.

8. What do you think their best quality is? You know how during a mario kart race you can see the names shuffle on the side as players cut in front or fall behind, that’s what your qualities are doing in my head now... You’re patient, so strong and independent (which I admire endlessly), generous, smart, but I guess what really sets you apart from me is your specific sense of humor and just wit in general??? idk how to explain, it’s not just that you make me laugh, it’s everything you say, I know only you would come up with that at that moment. It’s a big part of what makes me so excited when I’m around you, and a big part of why I miss you so badly when I’m not.

9. What does your best friend think their best quality is? Would they agree with you? Yee you think you’re funny and you’re right :p Unless now you think your patience is your top quality given how much you’ve put up with lately

10. What is your best friend’s favourite book (or book series)? The Hobbit

11. What do you have in common with your best friend? LMAO our shitty sense of humor... Omg what else though :o we’re really different... maybe how difficult we are when it comes to really letting people in? idk please answer this one better than me

12. How did you meet, and what was your first impression of your best friend? First day of uni!!!! I was lost and confused, she had papers and was alone and therefore less intimidating, I asked her where she got the documents from... And once I got them, I think sheeee was the one to offer we sit next to each other while I was munching on my apple ahaha. I missed the next meeting, but after that she saw me at the bus stop, and offered to wait for the bus with me??? Kindest thing anyone had ever done for me at that point in my life, so yeah... How far we’ve come :’) Very first impression though... “she looks reasonable enough to talk to... Oh she’s nice... Yay she’s really nice!!!” ahaha

13. What does your best friend spend their free time doing, and why do you think they choose to do what they do? Reading, petting the dogs, watching stuff, gaming... It’s escapism isn’t it babe :’) Anything that’s relaxing and distracts you from whatever is happening irl

14. Who is their favourite fictional character, and why? Luigi cause he wears green lmao and cause he’s like the “second” brother and therefore deserves more love

15. What’s the first thing you tell other people when you talk about your best friend? “So Chiru - she’s my best friend and you’ll be hearing about her every day -” ACTUAL LINE SERVED TO ALL MY CO-WORKERS. And then I tend to say we lived together for 2 years, and that I miss you a lot

16. What’s your favourite story about them? Is there a single fave...How we met, how we came to do our groceries together and suddenly became unseparable, MY SURPRISE BDAY x2, coming to cheer for me at cheer, casually inviting me to your home, Nice (omg you reading Scandinavia and the world to me!!), our Japan travels, everything, right up to getting your last dog, is a highlight in my life

17. What’s your least favourite story about them? :))) fuck if I am telling that on here. Oh shit I said I’d be honest. Look... I think sometimes you forget I’m pretty insecure and basically any minor (or... you know... not so minor) event that makes me think maybe you’ll leave me behind after all is just like. uhm. “least favorite stories” is a mild way to explain how I feel about those times

18. Why do you think you two ended up becoming best friends? My dudes I wonder a lot. I know it’s so much more than just living together, if anything that makes most people hate each other. It’s shared values, willingness to make balanced efforts for each other, an endless stream of ideas for fun coming from both sides, similar interests... I don’t know, but Chiru I am just so grateful everyday I did find you

19. Would you be honest with your best friend if they were happy doing something, but you think it might end up harming them in the end? Ouch. Ok well... The truth is sometimes I doooo worry, but I’m so convinced you know what you’re doing so much better than I do, that no, I tend to trust whatever you say, if you’re convinced (/telling me you’re convinced) that what you’re doing isn’t harming you, I’ll believe you. At least, that’s what I tell myself... A part me of does worry, though, that I just don’t speak up because you’ll already have all the arguments ready and we’ll just unnecessarily argue about it, and I’ll end up hurt, and yes exactly it’s as bad as it sounds, I’m worried I wouldn’t want to fight you over your happiness in case it would result in hurt feelings. I’m a mess, this is terrible and I gotta work on that

20. Does your best friend play any instruments? Why do you think they chose that instrument? BISH SAYS SHE CAN SORTA PLAY THE GUITAR AND PIANO BUT HAS SHE PLAYED FOR ME YET, I THINK NOT. I am unappreciated, where is my serenade (jk jk, I realy doooo wanna hear you play though!!)

21. Do you and your best friend have a dream for the future, if so, what is it? Move in with me please it’s the one thing that keeps me going

22. What is one thing you have always wanted to tell your best friend, but never have? :)))) ((((: *digs through a million letter drafts and hell, fic drafts, we all know where my inspiration comes from anyway* Sigh... Well first of all I need you to know you’re the most beautiful and kind soul I have ever encountered. Please get that through your head. Secondly... I don’t think I’d have EVER brought this up, but that’s what the question is aiming for, isn’t it... You probably only held my hand in Barcelona because I was so black-out wasted you were worried I wouldn’t follow you home otherwise, but it made me sort of ridiculously happy, and I guess I wouldn’t mind if it happened again

23. What do you think your best friend’s life will be like 10 years from now? What I’m thinking or wishful thinking hah... Thinking, well... deep breath, you’ll be alright :) You’ll have a comfortable home somewhere you like, with a job that suits you. You’re too stubborn to settle for any less. Your dogs are with you, of course. And so is whoever will be lucky enough to be chosen by you. You can guess based on that what the wishful thinking is

24. What song makes you think of your best friend? IT’S 4:18 AM AND HONESTLY THERE ARE SO MANY TO CHOOSE FROM (anything from Just Dance tbh XD) BUT I CHOOSE THIS GEM (45:21) because fukkit it’s cold as heeeeck in my room right now and I’m only listening to this kind of music

25. Just to end on a mean note, what’s your best friend’s worst personality trait? (Be honest now, guys, none of that “they’re just too kind” bullshit) Worst? You wanna hear something crazy... Well you know I miss you, I always do and have been for so long now, but once I thought maybe if I listed everything that maybe weren’t the beeesst parts of your personality, and all the parts of my personality that probably annoyed you, I’d force myself to accept that maybe it’d be best for us to stop living together... And gdi I tried. But it’s just a really ridiculous list ... or at least it was, until that one night... Remember when one of my friends took my phone and texted you quite extensively, and that went really really badly? Well here’s the moment of truth: (hey it’s 4:25 now and I was out) I had broken down sobbing after you compared me to your dogs again :’) Look, sober me can rationally process your way of thinking. But... I guess deep down, we’re not the same, I want to be loved and appreciated like a human being. I’m genuinely sorry I couldn’t bring myself to tell you this sooner, idk what I was so scared of. So, uh, “worst” personality trait (which really isn’t one but)... omg I can’t even phrase this without turning it against myself ahaha, like it’s my own fault for telling you that everything was fine when it wasn’t. So look this isn’t even about your worst personality trait, I guess it’s me realizing I gotta stop lying about crap, and I hope you’ll be considerate and understanding like always :’)

#my moon and stars #it's 3:24 am starting time #wish me luck #it is now 4:32 am and fml #this hangover is gonna suuuuuuck

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whiteladyofrohann · 7 years

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When did you start shipping Jonsa?

Hey anon, only quite recently if I’m being honest. Originally, Iwas against the ship. Obviously they aren’t actually brother and sister butthey were raised as siblings and so I didn’t like it. Then I watched season 6and fell in love with the ship. There are obviously so many obstacles, but Kitand Sophie had absolutely amazing chemistry that the obstacles didn’t bother meanymore and now all I want is Jon to marry Sansa and them to have childrennamed Eddard, Robb, Catelyn and Rickon. After watching season 6, I then re-readall the books, and although Jon and Sansa don’t actually interact, there are alot of things in the books that I immediately went ‘Omg Jonsa’.

S6 was perfect for the two of them. Whether you are a Jonsashipper or not, you have to say that the reunion was perfect. We’ve beenwaiting for a Stark reunion for years now, and so I thought, perhaps there’s adeeper meaning why it’s these two who reunite first. It was a beautiful scenethat made me cry, but it was the following scene that made me get on board theJonsa train. (Rest is under the cut because it’s a long one).

We hadn’t seen Jon or Sansa truly smile for a long time, andthey both were laughing and smiling at each other. It was wonderful to seethese two lost souls connect and light up and agree to fight for their home,for their family. And the scene at the end of episode 4 where Jon and Sansadecide to fight to take Winterfell back is another scene I love. But they’restill kind of awkward around each other. But that is something I love as well.Everyone knows there are many parallels between Jonsa and Ned/Cat. Addawkwardness in the beginning to those parallels. I imagine that the beginningof Ned and Cat’s marriage was very awkward, between Brandon and the woman Nedwouldn’t name, but we know that Ned is just genuinely awkward around women, atrait he passed along to Jon, because Jon’s biological father certainly had noproblem. These are obviously two very different scenarios, but I love that thefirst few Jonsa scenes are kind of awkward and the couple they mirror in somany ways developed from that into arguably the most loving relationship on theshow, and I felt that Jon and Sansa could follow that development.

Cut to episode 5, and we getthe scene where she hands him the cloak. I love this scene. It’s probably oneof the greatest gifts that Jon has ever received, and it comes from Sansa. Jon’senquiry about Sansa’s dress is another lovely choice, since my brother doesn’t carewhat dress I wear. My brother only comments when I have an awful choice inclothing, but Jon here comments that he likes Sansa’s dress, and then returnsto the awkwardness by saying he likes the wolf bit, almost retracting what hesaid before because he’s embarrassed. He then looks shocked when she gives himthe gift, and genuinely didn’t expect it. When she walks off, the small smilehe makes is another of my favourite moments.

There weren’t many Jonsastandout moments in episode 7, but in episode 9, there were plenty. They lookedlike a true power couple when they were side by side racing off against Ramsay.Take this line from the original script ‘Theylook beautiful and majestic, sitting there with Winterfell in the background’. Abeautiful, majestic couple back at their home. This is followed by theirargument scene in the tent, which is mostly fuelled on fear. Jon fears Rickonwill die, Sansa fears Jon will die, and then the argument ends with Sansatelling Jon she will kill herself if he loses. He looks heartbroken at that,and their argument stops dead. After the battle, Jon letting Sansa have thekill is a big moment as well, not necessarily a shipper moment, but it showsagain how compatible the two are.

The next scene we see themboth together is the scene on the balcony and it was another beautiful scene. There’san undeniable tension between the two and this scene demonstrates that. They openup to each other, confide in each other, offer each other the Lord’s Chambers,which they should share, but then we get the forehead kiss. A real tendermoment. And after it, Jon stares into Sansa’s eyes, even looks down at herlips. I don’t know any brother who looks at his sister that way. That was not aplatonic look, Kit Harington needs to learn how to look at his sister becausethat certainly had romantic vibes. Then Sansa makes Jon give the biggest smilein all 6 seasons we’ve seen him in.

Continuing on the smilefront, I’m pretty sure Jon smiles more in S6 around Sansa than he has done inthe rest of the seasons combined. Both of them seem freer and more relaxedaround each other than we’ve ever seen them. There’s also the lingering gazesthat both of them give each other. As I mentioned, platonically we don’t lookat our siblings the way Jon and Sansa looked at each other.

Season 7 comes along andthere is no doubt a power struggle between the two, but they argue almost likea married couple. They have each other’s best interests at heart. In episode 2when Jon is leaving and Sansa speaks out, she isn’t doing this because she istrying to undermind him, she is doing it because she loves him and doesn’t wanthim to meet the same fate as every other Stark in the south. She wants him tobe smarter than Ned and Robb, she doesn’t want him to die. In return, he doesn’twant her to be harmed, he threatens LF, a man he knows does not have her bestinterest at heart. He turns around to wave goodbye to her, rather than justwalking off, and it is emotional, and he’s worried that he’s leaving her, andshe’s worried that he’s going south.

Obviously that was the lastinteraction we’ve seen of them, but that didn’t stop them mentioning eachother. Sansa:

‘I wish Jon were here’ (Episode 3)

‘I hope he comes back soon’ (Episode 4)

‘Jon is our King’ (Episode 5)

Jon longs for home while he’son Dragonstone, he doesn’t like the south. And I love the reactions he makeswhen people talk about Sansa.

I’m sure we will see manyJonsa interactions in the show in S8, though she won’t be happy with him forbending the knee so that could cause problems. The Northmen don’t like theTargaryens, and won’t be happy with Jon. Jon’s claim on the North is very weakas it is, especially with three Starks in Winterfell and Sansa doing very well.If Jon has made an alliance with a Daenerys and then it’s revealed he’s aTargaryen, the Northmen may not want him as a King. What is the best way forhim to retain his status, to marry Sansa. Sansa who has no Targaryen ties, whowas born in Winterfell, who is a Stark. If Jon marries Sansa, it’ll mean hischildren are Ned Stark’s grandchildren, something that will mean a lot to him. Butpolitically in the North, this marriage would make sense.

In the books, there aren’t asmany clear cut Jonsa moments, but there are passages that mirror well and I lovethem:

“Frogfaced Lord Slynt…remembering how he had thrown down her father for Ser Ilyn tobehead, wishing she could hurt him, wishingthat some hero would throw him down and cut off his head.” (Sansa VI, GOT)

“Edd fetch me a block.” (Jon II, ADWD).

Guess who Sansa’s hero whobeheads Janos is? It’s Jon. Next, look at one of Sansa’s heroes from herstories:

“Shecalled for the heroes from her songs, for Florian and Ser Ryam Redwyne and Prince Aemon the Dragonknight, but no oneheard” (Sansa IV, ACOK)

“‘I’m Prince Aemon the Dragonknight’ Jonwould call out, andRobb would shout back, ‘Well I’m Florian the Fool’. Or Robb would say, ‘I’m theYoung Dragon,’ and Jon would reply, ‘I’mSer Ryam Redwyne.” (Jon XII, ASOS)

This is a lovely parallel,and added to the fact that Jon executes Janos, it paints Jon as a hero toSansa, one of the heroes from her songs. Add the fact that I’m sure Jon’s namein the books is Aemon, it is an amazing bit of writing from George

There are other things in thebooks as well, but a favourite line of mine is “I am a bastard too now, just like him. Oh, it would be so sweet to seehim once again”. This is likely to happen in the books and I believe theywill reunite before the other Starks, still probably in TWOW. I just love somesubtle things in the books that scream Jonsa.

This kind of got long, but I justadore the ship and I have high hopes for the books at least, and I so wantJonsa to be endgame, no matter what has happened in the show, until episode 6of season 8, I have hope.

#anon #ask #Jonsa #Jon x Sansa #Jon Snow #Sansa Stark

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rurulaura · 7 years

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Symbiosis thoughts.

All right. Let’s do a live re-watch of Symbiosis. I lost all of my thoughts from my other account.. SO i can’t even compare them. *sighs* Looks like I’m starting from scratch.

- i was pleased that most of my theories pertaining to maki and Meiko were correct. We had the confirmation that Maki and MM had planned on using Meicoomon to initiate the reboot. But that the plan was moving in action as far as 1999 is pretty amazing. It really shows how much Meiko had to go through with Meicoomon’s berserk behavior. Also how much time Maki had to wait for this day. Even MM was saying he had been waiting for this opportunity for years. Which begs, “when did this Gennai even appear?” I originally thought he had recently appeared like in the last year. But seems this Gennai clone has been around for longer. Guess the real Gennai forgot to mention that too! Big surprise there.

-Takeru calling Mysterious Man Gennal. Ok takeru I forgive you for calling MM ken now. :)

-Gotta give love to Mama Yagami. Always thinking of her kids. Making sure a meal was put on the table, waiting for them. This really brought me to tears. Actually, a lot of stuff did. lol

-Called Apocalymon’s data someone getting into Meicoomon’s egg as we see in Saikai. Since Meicoomon was supposedly born in 1999 it was more and more likely that it was Apocalymon’s data that got into her egg. THe helixes were a pretty big hint too. Since the data probably prevented Meicoomon to be rebooted. Only option was to kill her and revert her to an egg so she could be reborn without bad data. I’m not the only person to realize this. I’ll get to that later.

-The digidestined running around and falling into pits was hilarious as hell and I couldn’t stop laughing from this point on. OMG that’s why I needed to rewatch. My eyes were closed laughing so damn hard! I only wanted Taichi to fall down a hole, not you guys!

-The silly anime faces were hilarious. I like how that did that. It was nostalgic in its own sense. We don’t see silly anime faces a lot in anime these days like we did in the 90′s. So this is refreshing.

-i really liked the cave scene where everyone was comparing themselves to Meiko. They brought up what they knew and learned from their first adventure. It really tugged at my heart strings. This part made me feel like i was watching Digimon again. It was good. Really good.

-As out of place Agumon’s food obsession has been for the last few movies. THey really brought the punch lines at the perfect moments. Cave scene was perfect comedic timing .

- Papa Daigo comes into play. He only wishes the best for those kids and it really shows. Even questioning why he was Chosen...

-the sudden meichi moments really seem forced. It probably wouldn’t bother me so much if they had a small bit more interaction in previous movies.

-On the first watch through. I had to yell at the police that asked “DO you realize what is happening with the world right now?!” my response, yeah, they do. Three times over, actually! (1999, 2000, 2002) Though in their defense the kids didn’t realize the DIgimon were causing so much damage already. It looked peaceful in their area.

-Daigo was so damn cool during the police custody scene though. Love this guy. During the school scene, I missed Daigo chiming in with Hope. He was really struggling with his Chosen Child status this movie.

-I was worried that Meiko was going to be portrayed as crying and unmotivated the whole movie like she was in COnfession. But she continued to take action and was hardly crying. It’s understandable how in these first two parts she was down. Because even though she is trying to do her best to be a good partner. Everything keeps going wrong. Meicoomon still went berserk in the end and is causing so much damage in the real world. Her words couldn’t get to her. It’s understandable how Meiko is down. But after some encouragement, she does get back on her feet and faces some hard choices this movie...

-Hikari saying you never know how scary a situation is until it happens to you really rings true what’s happening in our world right now. With the US and it’s insanity. It’s a bit scary to think that even though the sky is blue and pretty outside... Not even far from you something horrible is happening.

-Scary stories at the school was fucking brilliant by the way. I loved this! It was so damn funny! It’s a really great Meiko moment too.

-I don’t know if people are complaining that Meiko took all the light this movie. But Taichi was the real show stealer here. He had some great scenes and the courtyard was one of them. We hadn’t seen much of this Taichi in a while i feel like.

-Agumon and Meiko was a hoot too. Him and his stomach and not understand Meiko and her heart. Aaaah. What a hoot.

-I loved the split screen evolutions. They took creative liberty on them and it looks neat to see. Also cuts the time down by a lot too.

-WHo exactly we are supposed to fight is what we’ve been wondering for 5 movies, Taichi. DOn’t worry. You aren’t the only one, buddy.

-Raguelmon coming into protect Meiko proved there is still a bond there. This is so important to remember later. Even if they have to kill Meicoomon or she dies. That bond is still there and can be reformed. There is still hope. Despite what Homeostasis and crew thinks about Meicoomon losing absolute control. They are wrong...

-Hikari telling Homeostasis to get the hell out of there was freaking awesome. Greatest moment she’s ever had.(that’s a sad thing to admit. She should have had more in the last two seasons and movies. ) Hikari may have had not much in this movie, but that’s not to do this movie. But next movie certainly leaves the door open for more for her. Especially since Meiko’s story comes to a resolution of sorts this movie.

-Once they hopped into the Digital World, I did hope that my theory that Alphamon is one of MM digimon that he can snap in to existence like Imperialdramon. But not today I guess. Guess everyone is too busy to wonder why Daigo can actually in the Digital World. Hey kids, think Daigo is a chosen? Too busy? Okei dokie. As they say, action now, questions later.

-Maki being in the dark ocean completely caught me by surprise. I wasn’t expecting that element to appear. Even the weird creatures are there!! I thought, “oh, there’s no time for the Dark Ocean to be introduced.” But as part of Maki’s story, totally fits. Also,I really doubt Maki is drowning to her death. I’m sure she’ll be fine. After an epic redemption that is. I mean, she’s already shooting guns at those things! You go you crazy axe girl! She reminds me of Riza from FMA. SOmeone’s gotta take care of the useless boys in the rain.

-Now the scene I absoulutely love. The moment i realized that needed to happen. THe reboot didn’t get rid of Meicoomon’s virus. THe only solution is to kill her. Meiko realizes this. I had hoped the writers would go this route. Of Meiko realizing Meicoomon was only causing suffering to the world and to her friends. That Meicoomon was constantly suffering inside. That the only thing to save her was... to kill her. I am so glad that Meiko came to this realization too. Her character has grown so much and I am so damn proud of her. I cried during this scene, because I knew what she was thinking. I felt for her so bad. Her character arc comes to its resolve... She understands. (See? Now next movie can focus on other things.. Happy haters?)

-I’m sure Taichi and Daigo will be okay. But that was intense. I really hope Daigo can get to Maki next movie.

-I really wish Hikari wasn’t still so reliant on her brother. Maybe this leads into good development next movie. Or so I hope.

-Meicoomon and Ophanimon fusion was indeed freaky as hell. Holy shit. Next movie is gonna be crazy...

-I was all for crazy Hikari. But daaaamn. To think it’d happen! Well, she isn’t walking around with a bloody hatchet, but close enough! COmmanding that fusion thing to destroy everything.

-I think the Dark Ocean even collided with the real world. YOu can see the dark ocean water pooling and going up in a spiral then the real world behind it..

-I always had Yamato in mind as the “leader” to pick up the pieces of Taichi ever fell. Now he has. Now get to see how this continues.

-Hey, how about that other kid that inherited Taichi’s goggles? We should see them too.

#digimon #tri spoilers #symbiosis #kyousei #meiko mochizuki #taichi yagami #yamato ishida #sora takenouchi #jou kido #koushirou izumi #mimi tachikawa #takeru takaishi #hikari yagami

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punkscowardschampions · 5 years

Text

Edie & Nancy

Edie: here then is it? Nancy: Yeah Nancy: Do you wanna see some pics? Edie: nah Edie: saw the socials Nancy: They're both okay, like Edie: Obvs, McKenna, reckon they'd bother to hmu if they were dead Edie: cheers then Nancy: There's a huge difference between alright and dead Nancy: I'm just saying Edie: not to me Nancy: Do you want me to tell anyone anything or? Edie: do what u wanna Edie: everyone busy Nancy: They aren't that busy Nancy: It's a baby not a bomb threat Edie: she ain't that special Edie: least they were expecting that alien looking thing this time Edie: progress Nancy: Barely but you know Nancy: Feels like a giant step back if anything Edie: 🙄 Edie: gutted for you Nancy: No you aren't, so don't bother with any of it Edie: obviously not Nancy: Is there anything else you actually wanna know/say 'cause I'm not good at this Nancy: Let's not pretend I am Edie: you rude as fuck Nancy: And what, you're the only one allowed? Edie: i ain't done anything to you but nah feel pressed Edie: u love it Nancy: You've disappeared and everyone is worried. You don't care about that but I do Nancy: So sorry if I don't wanna indulge it, like Edie: only got time for your sads? Edie: joke Nancy: I wish Nancy: We'd all love to run away Nancy: But some of us have to actually stick around Edie: boohoo Edie: dry Edie: what good u think u are mckenna Nancy: Go away again, Edie Nancy: I don't need this Nancy: Nobody does Edie: 😂 Edie: u ain't got nothing but problems you made up cos ur boring Edie: same as her, fucking drew the only excitement she ever had Nancy: Thanks for the therapy session Edie: mommy issues, next Nancy: You're such a cliche Nancy: At least give me one I haven't heard a million times before Edie: ok miss i want my teacher to pipe me Edie: act superior some more it funny Nancy: I'll be here all week Nancy: And longer Edie: whatever Edie: no u wont but run your mouth all u want Edie: u all talk a big game Nancy: Some of us do bother to say what we mean Nancy: Shockingly Edie: nah Edie: you out in a few months max Edie: the only one that always here is him and he always will be Nancy: Going to uni doesn't make me a ghost Nancy: Keeping in touch is easy if you want to Edie: like u ain't already Edie: oh babe Nancy: You don't know me Edie: who wants to Nancy: Plenty of people Edie: yeah like i say Edie: making up problems done wonders for ur cred Edie: least they talking yeah Nancy: Like I said, you don't know me Edie: u wish Edie: transparent Nancy: I really don't Nancy: I've dealt with enough bitches already thanks Edie: 😥 Edie: nawh Nancy: You wanna talk shit to me some more, go ahead Nancy: Nice to know you're still alive at least Edie: always with the self-pity, ain't a good look fyi but go off Nancy: You'd know Edie: i'm the only one celebrating this thing birth not comiserating Edie: poor fuck Nancy: Congrats, like Nancy: Go do that and leave me alone Edie: nah Nancy: I'm ignoring you now Edie: sure Edie: like u can Nancy: Literally always have Edie: yeah why u had to run here init Edie: so strong Edie: so like ur mummy Nancy: I'm not strong and it ain't news Edie: hoping playing damsel get u some Edie: who ain't Edie: cute Nancy: No, I just know myself Nancy: You can't hurt me by pointing out my flaws, babe. I'm aware Edie: who trying Edie: no need Edie: ready to cry over nothing always Nancy: Keep talking like you know about it Nancy: It just shows how much you don't Edie: so mysterious Edie: so guarded Edie: now u wishing Nancy: You're just putting words in my mouth now Nancy: You wish you knew me well enough to call me out Nancy: I'm not my brother, sorry. I don't wanna flirt with you Edie: i already said Edie: no one tryna know u babe Edie: least of all him Edie: comorbidity with ur mommy issues is ur twincest moment obvs Nancy: You're so wrong it's just awkward Edie: u brought up flirting w him Edie: that's awks Nancy: I brought him flirting with you, actually Edie: not rio Edie: why u jealous Nancy: Gross Nancy: He loves her, he entertains you Nancy: Not the same thing Edie: we all pretending that ain't fucked up then but this drew situ omg defcon1 Edie: this family 😂 good for the craic if literally nothing else Nancy: Nobody's pretending it isn't a mess Nancy: They just aren't being as rude as you Edie: oh no Edie: they'd NEVER do that Edie: 'cept they let joe pipe his own sister, drew fuck his way through this entire fam, gonna let them get married Edie: yeah Edie: the last thing you all do is turn a blind eye 😂 Edie: keep posting them pics like it's cute Nancy: Live in the past some more like it matters Nancy: It's done Nancy: I can't personally change it for you so Edie: past? Edie: bitch this happening right now Edie: jokes too miss imma have a victim complex cos the rich girls didn't wanna play nice with me Nancy: What's happening right now is being dealt with right now, Jesus Nancy: You'd know if you were here Edie: too late as per Edie: let it become a problem then we can all feel so sorry for ourselves aw Edie: let the skeleton raise the abortion go off Edie: slaying it Nancy: What's your solution? Nancy: We can't tell her what to do Edie: get the bitch hospitalized Edie: duh Edie: she isn't fit to be in her job or be a ma Edie: let her fuck this one up tho, join the ranks Nancy: If I could, I would Edie: sure Nancy: What you think you're the only one who's just had that oh so original thought? Nancy: Please Edie: please, like ur the only one acting as if your hands are tied Nancy: Mine are Nancy: What the fuck do you think I can do, Edie? Edie: grow a pair mckenna Edie: the act didn't work Edie: miss didn't wanna fuck u, mommy ain't coming to rescue u either 'cos u ain't her fave Edie: try something else, be original, christ Nancy: Oh my god Nancy: And do what? Nobody's gonna put Ro in hospital 'cause I say so Nancy: Or take the kid when she technically hasn't done anything wrong Edie: ring the social Edie: christ got an in Edie: like nan ain't been knew since she took the bitch in she ain't right Nancy: You know they'd investigate and do nothing Nancy: You aren't that stupid Edie: u know u too pussy to do it Edie: everyone in this fam and they wanna front like they anything but Nancy: Bullshit Nancy: Lord, I wish everything was as black and white as you're convinced it is Edie: here we go again Edie: woe is the tragic clan Edie: newsflash, normal people aren't beset by all this fucking drama and actual bullshit Edie: cos they don't roll around in it and revel in the fucking stink Nancy: None of us are normal, get over it Edie: u reckon u ain't wait for all the inbreeding kids ur gonna have to pretend are cute Edie: snap snap Nancy: Again, what do you want me to do? Nancy: I can't stop them being together Nancy: It's not like I want them to be in love or get married Edie: sure no one can we're all so helpless Edie: enough people had the balls to say nah it's fucked Edie: then rio would stop, end of, we all know it Nancy: Or they'd run away like you have Nancy: That's made everyone really happy, like Edie: yeah ur welcome Edie: more drama to jack it to Nancy: You're so selfish Edie: what, and you're the only ones allowed? Edie: gasp Edie: everyone is out for themselves and harps on the others for doing it too Edie: keep up Nancy: That's how you see it 'cause that's how it suits you Edie: that's the spirit Nancy: Your mum had a good birthday, by the way Edie: didn't ask Edie: but unsurprised Nancy: I knew you wouldn't Nancy: Doesn't mean you shouldn't know Edie: that the best u got like Edie: i been knew she's the worst of all Nancy: You wish Edie: yeah i love having a cunt for a ma hbu babe Nancy: You do though Nancy: You love thinking you do anyway Edie: yh buzzin Edie: got it in one Edie: u really aren't the smart 1 damn Nancy: I've never tried to say I am Nancy: You've got the wrong twin there Nancy: I'm the stupid one, and again, aware Edie: 😥 Edie: good ting i ain't here for ur wisdom Nancy: Fuck knows what you are here for Nancy: Please go Edie: the craic Edie: i told u Edie: so funny Nancy: If I'm the best you've got Nancy: Poor you Edie: fucking hell mckenna Edie: no one ever gonna wanna fuck u with an attitude like that Nancy: The good thing about fucking is that you don't have to talk Edie: pillow princess Edie: figures Nancy: Oh so you like to be chatty with it? Okay Edie: just a suggestion Edie: u ain't all that to look at either wanna give 'em something to keep interest Nancy: I don't want them to stick around so it's fine Nancy: But you do you Edie: oh and i'm selfish Edie: just like ur brother Edie: cute Nancy: Didn't you get the memo Nancy: He's changed Edie: least he might be worth the ride now then Edie: good for him Nancy: Gross Nancy: I hope you don't want me to pass that message on Edie: keep it to yourself if that's how you vibing girl Nancy: I'd rather not hear it but you didn't ask Edie: just meeting your expectations Edie: i'm rude yeah Nancy: Like you're so offended Edie: 💔 Nancy: I think you have to have one, babe Edie: ya 'bullies' school you that zinger Edie: knew it weren't that bad Nancy: They were more about the homophobia Nancy: Unlikely to work on you Edie: it ain't the 70s who does it Nancy: If you wanna go to London and tell them Nancy: Still probably something they could do with learning Edie: how you know i aint Nancy: If you were in Chelsea you'd have more to laugh at than me and this conversation Edie: dun think we share a sense of humour Nancy: I can't say that 💔's me Edie: aw ain't it nice to find something that don't get you 😥 Edie: love that 4 u Nancy: Okay Edie: it's been real Edie: laters Nancy: I hope not Edie: dry Nancy: Honestly you'd be better off speaking Irish to me Edie: dryshite then Edie: 🍀 enough for ye Edie: like u local Nancy: At least now I don't have to pretend I know what you're talking about Nancy: Thanks Edie: just claim ur dyslexia like ur tryna cash ur giro Nancy: Yeah Edie: wonder if u can park disabled Nancy: I can't drive so I can't tell you Nancy: If you wanna try and claim it though, they'd likely believe you Edie: hahahaha u calling me disabled now for the punch of it Edie: victim complex strikes again n the bullied becomes the bully Edie: u easiest to wind up ever imma do this more Nancy: I'm calling you an idiot Nancy: And I'm blocking you so good luck Edie: aw dont do urself like that Edie: nother thing for u to feel sorry bout when i die n i was tryna reach out for help Nancy: Like you said, if anyone dies we hear about it Edie: too little too late mckenna Nancy: For you yeah Nancy: I'm not the Samaritans babe I can barely send a coherent text Edie: yh i heard Edie: her cousin goes to my school tried coming at me fore i left like i care bout u being a tick Nancy: Okay Nancy: I don't wanna talk about her with you so bye Edie: ooooooooooo Edie: touched a nerve Nancy: Obviously Edie: bah why Edie: thought u dont want em to stay Edie: such a bad bitch Nancy: Shut up Edie: hahahahaha Nancy: Seriously Edie: get a grip mckenna Edie: she ain't even a ride Nancy: I'm not doing this Edie: you're a joke man Edie: u don't care bout none of ur family enough to shut me up but i wanna chat on this shtate Edie: and suddenly u got a dick Edie: lmao Nancy: That isn't news either, keep up like Nancy: I can't shut up about them 'cause you've got a point Nancy: It doesn't mean I don't care Edie: 'course not Edie: put it away Edie: she got a real gf now Nancy: I know Nancy: She's had several actually Nancy: You're out of the loop Edie: what a slag Edie: have to be to let u when u ain't bringing nothing to the table by ur own admission Nancy: Thanks Nancy: Homophobia belongs in the 70s but this doesn't, the world according to Edie Mckenna, okay Edie: oh shut up germaine greer Edie: i ain't tryna get in ur pants u don't need to impress me with ur regurgitated feminism 101 from ro n my mother of all people Nancy: You're the one who's still talking and staying in my inbox past your welcome, like Edie: cos i can handle it Edie: u the one getting heated baby Nancy: Well done, you Edie: aw thank u Nancy: Good thing you don't need to impress me either Edie: by pretending it don't make u a bad person to drop your knickers quicker than u can pull up the last? Edie: original Edie: get ur own personality Nancy: We've established I do Nancy: And gone into all its flaws Nancy: Again, keep up Edie: lmao u think thats urs Edie: okay when uve stapled together pieces of every bitch u want to love u Nancy: If you say so Nancy: It must be true Edie: duh Edie: see it as a chance to be better Edie: u ain't loving this Edie: n no one else is Nancy: Yeah 'cause I really wanna improve myself based on your standards Edie: who said anything bout me Edie: ill never fuck w u mckenna Edie: u still gonna be dry whatever u do Nancy: You're the only one telling me to be better Nancy: So you are Edie: well ur rents gave up on that dream didn't dey Edie: pin all dat on ur bro Nancy: Yeah they did Nancy: Tell me something I don't know or shut up Edie: poor poor baby Edie: hit up sugar town, ur namesake was on to something w that one Edie: drew good for some lsd always Nancy: That'll really help, thanks so much, babe Edie: howd u kno Edie: pussy Edie: aint even fuckin right Nancy: I know that I've got a fucked up enough brain already Nancy: Not gonna disable myself more Edie: yh well they use it to treat depression so try it Edie: stop u whining so much Nancy: There's plenty of other ways if I was so inclined Nancy: So thoughtful though Edie: obvs Edie: u love it Edie: when u got nothing else babe Nancy: Whatever you say Edie: 😥 Nancy: I've gotta go cry now, obviously Nancy: So Edie: damn u cant multitask Edie: really out here strugglin' Edie: ttfn babe Nancy: Not the way I do it Nancy: I have to go all in, of course Nancy: So much sadness Edie: nah u about the most half-arsed of all of 'em i reckon Edie: really do better Edie: i believe in u Nancy: No you don't Edie: sure i do Edie: know dat dnt sit right w ur whole victim schtik but Edie: unlucky Nancy: It doesn't sit right with anything about you more like Nancy: But okay Edie: lmao yh Edie: u 1 of a kind Edie: so special so misunderstood Nancy: By you yeah Nancy: But that's fine by me Edie: bitch we know Edie: live 4 it Edie: get it Edie: anything to feel like u better than the rest Nancy: You're ridiculous Nancy: When's the last time you even spoke to me before this? You don't know anything Edie: whens the last time u spoke Edie: dont mean u an enigma Edie: no one as thick as u tryna paint me especially not me Nancy: It means I'm shy, bitch Nancy: That's all it means Edie: yea yea Nancy: Yeah well Edie: u should talk more Edie: fun Nancy: For you but Nancy: I don't like you so unlikely to happen Edie: 💔 Edie: who does Edie: even u aint that fucked up n lookin for the sympathy Nancy: Most of this family, more fool them Nancy: Something else I can't do anything about Edie: Tragic Nancy: Yeah Edie: that's what happens when u don't get out the clothes hanger, like Edie: hey ho, 'nother bastard for the pile Nancy: 💔 Edie: yeah gonna find it well jokes when its one u actually care abt Nancy: Sure Nancy: By your reckoning I live for the misery so I'll be thriving anyway Edie: only yr own Edie: gonna get in yr way Edie: can't really verbally smackdown a kid when you've had a few Edie: 'less you wanna be that, currently without a drunk in the fam so Nancy: Also according to you I won't be here Nancy: So feel free to take that role on Edie: i ain't a virgin Edie: drinking ain't even good craic Edie: keep up, mckenna Nancy: I don't care if it brings you joy or not Edie: 😂 Edie: ooh Edie: savage Nancy: I've already told you I don't like you Nancy: Keep up yourself Edie: i told u ion care Edie: why Edie: u reckon i shuld Nancy: No Nancy: I'd rather you didn't Edie: good Edie: how u got it baby Nancy: Yay for me, like Edie: 😂 Edie: christ Edie: crackin a smile rlly wud break u yh Nancy: For you, yeah Edie: just bitches who ain't into u Edie: rejection rlly hittin that spot i c Nancy: No, just you Nancy: You're enough of a bitch Edie: ray of sunshine Edie: everyone always be saying it Edie: honestly u lost ur point a while ago Nancy: That's what I do babe Nancy: Dyslexia 101 Edie: so sad Edie: enough brain training for today then sugar, peace Nancy: At least my lack of short term memory means I can forget this convo Nancy: Bye

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the-scot-blog1 · 7 years

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Scrolling through Twitter one afternoon, I stumbled upon an amazing little feature by blogger Liam McNally – he had posted a text post with a number of different film titles from each year of his life. Bloody brilliant.

So I’ve decided to give it a go. I’ve been on this wonderful planet for almost 19 years now, and although I wasn’t alive for the release of Jurassic Park, there have been a fair few phenomenal films in my lifetime.

This is my longest post to date – I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. (2730 words – bloody hell).

1998: Pleasantville

Oh my God. I didn’t realise how difficult this post was until I searched ‘1998 films’ into Google. The Trueman Show, Saving Private Ryan and The Wedding Singer all in the one year? God, anyone alive and kicking back then must have been having the best year of their lives.

But despite the 10 minute long decision process, I’ve decided on Pleasantville. I watched it when I was very young and hadn’t ever worn a bra, much less watched anything like that bath scene. Despite my mortified eyes however, the film will always be one of my favourites. I remember seeing the main character for the first time and just constantly thinking god, this is a weird film for Spiderman and Elle Woods to be in.

1999: 10 Things I Hate About You

Again, this year is bloody difficult. The Iron Giant, The Mummy and Toy Story 2 – they just don’t make films like them anymore. Although I wasn’t a fan of Star Wars Episode 1 – it has to be one of my least favourites. Anyway.

10 Things I Hate About You was one of the first chick-flicks I ever watched. I knew Heath Ledger as ‘the strangely cute singing guy from that movie’ before I knew him as the Joker. I felt like I related to Kat – I wasn’t big on getting a boyfriend, and I was pretty much destined to be a wee bit strange since birth. Plus her name is so cool.

2000: X-Men

At the time of watching, I was right into Harry Potter. I loved the idea of special schools dedicated to supernatural people – it made my own secondary school even more boring. I’d often just sit in class and daydream about being able to fly or have the ability to imitate people.

But in all honesty, the one person I was most envious of was Quicksilver. And not because I wanted to save the world or any of that pish. No. When I sat in my third year physics class, the smells from the cafeteria always decided to sneak up the vent and attack my nostrils. I would get so unbelievably hungry, and my stomach would always tell my classmates just that. So I used to daydream about running faster than time, sprinting down into the dining hall, grabbing a steaming hot spicy chicken panini (and maybe some soup, if I could manage) and munching it before heading back up to class. Yeah – I wanted superpowers so I could eat my lunch early.

2001: The Princess Diaries

AH. I’ve got a feeling film directors are deliberately messing with me right now. Legit, I had a look at the films from 2001, and I was floored. What an amazing year. The first Harry Potter movie came out this year – the beginning of an absolute era. Shrek debuted as well – but I was always slightly offended when people heard my Scottish accent and compared me to a giant green ogre when I travelled abroad. The first Lord of the Rings film came out as well – see what I mean about them messing with me?

But despite all of my favourite film franchises beginning in this year, I gotta say, the Anne Hathaway/Julie Andrews combo that is The Princess Diaries absolutely stole my heart. I had never related to a character more – I had frizzy hair, buck teeth, oversized glasses and a tendency to prioritise spending time with my cat over hanging out with real-life friends. So when she went through her beautiful princess transformation, I was floored. I mean, I’m still waiting for that to officially happen, but I’m still holding out hope that I have a long lost relative that’s gonna tell me I’m a princess (no, not you mum).

2002: The Pianist

Originally, I had written the first Spiderman as my favourite film of 2002. But that quickly changed.

The first time I watched The Pianist, I was 13 years old in a stuffy history classroom. I still hold the belief that this was definitely not the right time to watch this film. It felt as though my teacher didn’t have any material to convey how horrific the Holocaust really was, and so instead she stuck on one of the most distressing and hauntingly beautiful films of all time. I didn’t fully appreciate it back then – I cried when I watched the horrors that took place in the ghettos, and got even more upset when immature people around me started to laugh.

But I watched it for a second time a few years later. Although I cried again, I gained a much deeper understanding of the film. I still listen to the soundtrack when I want to write a particularly moving or sad chapter of a book. The film has such a disgusting beauty to it, it is astounding – it makes me question my morals when I say it is one of my favourite films.

2003: Peter Pan

Again, there were so many amazing films this year – I can’t explain my guilt at not choosing Finding Nemo or the last instalment of the Lord of the Rings trilogy.

But I found my first love in the live-action remake of Peter Pan. Just a few years after it was released, I found myself watching it time and time again. I was young, and there was a boy with messy hair and a fairy to keep him company. Honestly, I was head over heels. I grew to absolutely despise Wendy Darling. How dare she take away my Peter, with her stupid bow and annoying accent. And the fact that Lucius Malfoy was Captain Hook just made it that little bit better.

2004: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

You’re lying if you say that this isn’t one of your favourite films.

Again, it was tricky not choosing The Incredibles or Mean Girls – even The Notebook made it to my shortlist. But the way the Weasley twin’s hair sat and the introduction of the marauders just made my life complete. Except for Pettigrew. Fuck you, Pettigrew. I’d read the book before I saw the film, and while I was slightly disappointed with the previous two, I didn’t stop talking about PoA for months. In fact, I still talk about it. It’s great.

2005: Sky High

This year was going to be beautifully simple – I absolutely love Star Wars Episode III. In fact, it was possibly the only film I was certain of when I started this post. But, never the less, I looked at the list of 2005 films anyway, and was reminded of the best thing I’ve ever watched. Ever.

Remember earlier in the post when I said that I frickin LOVE schools for supernatural people? WELL HERE WE GO AGAIN. I watched Sky High recently with my friend Ross, and even although the acting was abysmal and my cringe levels were off the chart, I couldn’t help but smile. As if the flying school bus wasn’t enough, the euphoria I felt when Will and Warren won Save the Citizen was something I don’t think I’ll ever feel again.

2006: Pan’s Labyrinth

I feel like if I choose any film other than this, my Spanish teacher would kill me. Again, it’s another film that we watched at way too young an age in my opinion. Sure, it looks all mystical with fairies and creepy monsters with eyeball hands, but it has this underlying story-line of the horrors of war and escapism that you can’t fully understand until you’re a bit older.

I watched it again when I was 17 and studying Advanced Higher Spanish, and knew the film as ‘El Laberinto del Fauno’. I could go on for 20 minutes about this film and its director (which I did by the way, in the final exam).

2007: Ratatouille

WHAT A FILM BTW. I’ve always loved Disney – my sister and I would spend nights staying up way past our 8pm bedtime watching Aladdin and Peter Pan, with a fair few stolen After Eight mints from my mum’s bedroom too. This film just completely blew me away – the animation was new and cool and it was set in PARIS.

Even now, ten years later (omg ten years wtf) I still think about the scene where Remy combines the cheese and grapes, and little fireworks and swirls form in his mind. I once ate a McDonald’s chip and then took a sip of my strawberry milkshake, and legit I’m pretty sure that’s what happened in my mind.

2008: The Chronicles of Narnia – Prince Caspian

Enter stage left – my second love. At the age of nine, Prince Caspian had everything I could ever want in a guy (or so I thought). He had a sword, long hair, an accent I had never heard before and he fought Peter Pevensie (I seem to hate a whole lot of Peters).

I thought it was the coolest combination of Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter, and it was while watching this that I began to have a crisis about my true Hogwarts house. I had always thought myself a Gryffindor – I had the scarf, the pens and the egotistical ‘I’m-better-than-you’ attitude that all young Gryffs seem to adopt. But I found myself siding with Edmund Pevensie about a whole lot of things. I didn’t fully accept Slytherin as my true house till a good few years later.

2009: Star Trek

I watched Star Trek before I even touched Star Wars, and I was absolutely hooked. It was what introduced me to science fiction, really. After Star Trek, I moved onto Doctor Who, and although I couldn’t really get into the Star Trek TV series, I found my love of sci-fi growing.

It was my love of Star Trek that caused me to accidentally find Star Wars. My brother would constantly go on about C3PO and lightsabers, and I decided very early on that it wasn’t for me. But after trying (and failing) to find Star Trek online, I accidentally found Star Wars instead, and thus began my love of the Skywalkers and giant wookies named Chewy.

2010: How To Train Your Dragon

Other than Aladdin, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III was one of my first (of many) cartoon crushes. I thought he was the most adorable lil guy ever – he was clumsy, dorky, and absolutely loved animals. He was perfect. I thought the animation was absolutely incredible, and the Scottish accents were just a bonus. I much preferred being compared to Gerard Butler than a green ogre, in all honesty.

And don’t even get me started on how he looked in How To Train Your Dragon 2 – oaft.

2011: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part Two

HPDHP2 is right up there with the Prisoner of Azkaban. I remember heading to the midnight release of the last Harry Potter book – I was decked out in a Scream robe that we’d stitched a Gryffindor badge onto, with curly hair that reached my shoulders. And yes, I won the costume contest. But I remember staying up that night and reading the book until 7am, and having to head to school the next day without a wink of sleep. And yet I didn’t care – I had just finished the last book in a series that completely shaped my childhood.

So when the movie hit the cinema screens, I was praying that I wouldn’t be disappointed like I was with some of the others. And apparently, my prayers were answered. Even although the Deathly Hallows is split into two parts, I always consider them the one film. And it’s most certainly my favourite.

2012: The Perks of Being a Wallflower

This film really got to me. I bundled up in warm clothes to see it in the cinema with my friend Ailish, and it was the first ever film I had cried at. I’d read the book before hand and cried my eyes out, but the severity and meaning of the story didn’t hit me until I watched the film. Logan Lerman and Emma Watson were two of my favourite stars at the time: I knew Emma from Harry Potter obviously, whilst Logan stole my heart as Percy Jackson.

But what struck me most was the way I related to these characters. I often found myself standing next to the wall in school dances, watching people having a good time but being physically incapable of joining in – it was as if my feet were constantly glued to the floor. It was comforting to know that I wasn’t alone in this, and it lead to me being able to open up to my guidance teacher about my struggles with anxiety.

I also wrote about the original book in my piece ’13 books to help get over a break up’ – check it out.

2013: The Hobbit – The Desolation of Smaug

When the making of the Hobbit was first announced, I was ecstatic. But my excitement somewhat wavered when I heard they were turning into three films. It was a small book – tiny in comparison to the three Lord of the Rings texts – how on earth would they stretch this wonderfully small work into three different films?

And yet somehow, they managed it, and subsequently made one of my favourite films of all time. Why, you ask? The barrel scene.

2014: Guardians of the Galaxy

Not gonna lie, this one was a toss up between the hilarious Chris Pratt and the absolutely adorable Baymax. But, as much as I love Disney’s tale of superpowers and love therapy in Big Hero 6, it didn’t win this year for me. The best thing about the film is without a doubt the soundtrack – even four years later, I still listen to it when I wanna get psyched.

I wanted to cosplay as Gamora for last year’s MCM Comic Con in Glasgow so bad, but then I realised that I’d more than likely sweat off the green body paint and the leather would more than likely get quite uncomfortable.

2015: Star Wars – The Force Awakens

Up until 2015, I was losing interest in Star Wars. I’d watched the films countless times, but as much as I adored them, I couldn’t stop thinking about the shabby effects. So when Finn, Poe and Rey lit up my local cinema screen in December 2015, it was as if I was born again. I suddenly dived back into the world of lightsabers and gun-wielding Wookies, and I genuinely haven’t looked back since.

And although I cried my eyes out when that thing happened, I agreed with it – it was about time.

2016: Finding Dory

I actually travelled Australia for a month last year – I left school and just decided to get away from everything and everyone for a little while. So after I met my brother and we began to explore Sydney, we decided what better place to watch the latest instalment in Finding Nemo than the place where it’s set??

I was slightly disappointed to find out that Nemo and Dory did not, in fact, stay in Sydney for the duration of the film, but even so – it was just amazing.

I was going to write a segment for 2017 but then I realised – I legit haven’t watched any new releases yet. I’ve simply not had any time. And yes, that means that I haven’t even watched the new Beauty and the Beast. For shame.

But even although I haven’t watched anything yet, there are tonnes of films that I’m looking forward to – Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2, Spiderman Homecoming, and Star Wars: The Last Jedi to name a few.

Hey, maybe I’ll revisit this post at the end of the year and add in my favourite film.

I’m tagging the fantastic Emily and Lucie in the ‘Film for every year of my life’ tag.

What are your most loved films from these years? Do we share any favourites? Or do you think my choices are just downright wrong? Let me know!

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18 films in 18 years: My favourite stories since I was born was originally published on Ellan

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