#omg but try and tell me im wrong
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roomba-sticsideeye · 1 year ago
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ok, so im going back to my roots a lil bit but ive been feeling nostalgic lately and so im now rewatching steven universe for like the bajillionth time and ive also been reading fanfics abt the show cuz duh and omg i found something-
YOU CAN NOT TELL ME THIS ISNT SO PERLAPIS CODED!!!!! the symbolism in this song in relations to them KILLS ME EVERY TIME!!!
lapis and pearl both have issues with trust and relationships (platonic and romantic respectively) and theyve been used before. they know what it means to be trapped, and trapped by something that they feels gives them purpose. they especially know what it feels like to obsess over something, and run back to the unhealthy even when they could be free. they have only experienced toxic relationships, so i really really wanna either write or find a fic that explores them in a SUPER toxic way. like, brings out their faults and screaming at each other while also heatedly making out/loving the shit outta one another in the most obsessive unhealthy way imaginable. it could be human or regular gem au idrc as long as its toxic and a mess and oh so beautiful!!
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frongle444 · 1 month ago
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[BREAKING NEWS: GREAT ASTRONOMICAL DISCOVERIES]
teehee you may have seen this coming :3 i love these sillies especially margaret you go girl
(btw i havent listened to the ghosts of antikythera yet so no spoilers plsplspls :3 tyy)
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corvidcas · 2 years ago
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i think part of the reason people are so hateful about fat people is because theyre not fat, even though they put little to no effort into their diet and daily activity levels. even if they dont live healthy lifestyles and theyre not trying to, and theyre still a "normal" weight. and because theyre ignorant and resistant to learning about how peoples bodily functions vary wildly, anyone who is fat must have brought it upon themselves by being extra lazy or extra glutinous and if they were normal they wouldnt be fat and its soooo easy to not be fat because look at them theyre not fat. which is so fucking stupid because so many people complain about how skinny people exist without "earning" how skinny they are, theyre literally just like that even if they eat tons of food because they're trying desperately not to be skinny. but the opposite cant be true for fat people apparently. fatness is always a direct consequence of abnormal habits apparently.
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jrueships · 14 days ago
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I HATEEEEE DYSPEXIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#so im driving some little dude to his appointment i left like super early incase n it turns out i was given an address to a fking House ?!?!#obviously he doesnt know the address cus hes just some lil dude so im like ringing up his guardians and#the one that actually goes to the hairstylist cant answer obs cus i had to take his son cus hes busy duh#BUT THAT MEANS IM JUST DRIVING AROUND SOME PLACE IDK TRYING TO FIND PLACES THAT LOOK LIKE HAIR#& when i find one im like uh does this barber sound familiar cus im not taking him to some random one#andlike omg and the entire time im playing music real loud trying not to cuss out in front of this little kid#like IM ALREADY SHIT WITH NAVIGATION. & THEN U GIVE ME THE WRONG ADDRESS AND IT'S RAINING#and he wants to go get an icecream afterwards n im sitting at the barber chatting it up#but i am like actually on the verge of a breakdown cus i made him late bcs i cant just figure shit out#like#it's just so fking frustrating like it makes me feel like a failed adult or smthing like#i AM GOOD. I AM GOOD AT DRIVING#once i know a place im good but if im lost it's like my brain is panicking too much#i have to look at the road and signs and places#like i turned at a green light and completely forhot it wasnt an arrow like i just saw green and went#like i couldve killed this little kidlike#IM GOING FUCKING CRAZY#and i dont want anyone to feel bad or like have to be extra cautious when they need me to drive or smthing#like im alrdy very frustrated with my stupid limitations like in general so like failure kinda just heightens it like#iURGHHH I HATE BEING IMPERFECT I CANT FKING STAND IT IDC IF THATS NARCISSISTIC N PRIDEFULNIDCC#it's better than being EMBARRASSED i HATE BEINGNEMBRASSING AGRGHHHHHH#anyways it's fking raining and it's dark . idek where im gonna take this kid bro like hes hungry#imma go on google YIPPEE#my best friend. google maps who i cant tell distances on so i either turn too soon or too late or rlly fking quick#Ii LOVE MY LIFEEE
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b1mbodoll · 1 year ago
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repeating “jealousy is a disease get well soon bitch” in my head every time i block rude anons and delete hatemail so i can try to brush it off but i am not ur strongest soldier so can you all stop being mean 🩷 please
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deathsmallcaps · 2 months ago
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I swear. I comprehend I’m not the best teaching intern in the world. I also was not the best camp counselor, cashier, and so on. But if my observer gives me so much criticism that I cry again I’m going to be so motherfucking pissed.
Especially since she’s asking me to stay late just to review me. While I have family visiting. And I’m gone for most of the day. And my commute is over half an hour. Which isn’t bad around here but still.
#vent#I’m working on it but I cry after like 5+ concentrated minutes of disappointment from bosses and such#we’re staying late because she observed yesterday but#but just like last week she thought my planning period was *at the wrong spot*#it turns out that I did tell her wrong twice FUCK#BUT THERE WAS ALSO ONE TIME I DID TELL HER RIGHT I SWEAR. PLUS I TOLD HER LAST WEEK IN PERSON. I COMBED THROIGH MY EMAILS#I just sent an email with all the correct information so hopefully that resolves the issue#I cried for like two days last week. her criticism is fairly valid but alsoooooo I’m trying to work with my partner Teachers values& methods#WHICH THE OBSERVOR ESPOUSED. last week she was like ‘omg your partner teacher is the best omg you better treat her as the great resource#that she is’ and meanwhile I like my partner teacher but her methods are boring and teacher centered#she swears it’s how she gets through to these kids and I can see that#like by tenth grade a huge change in educational structure would probably be more distracting than helpful for the better part of a year to#these kids#especially since I’m here for maybe a month.#not worth fucking these kids over#and considering the students get to use their notes on tests im just. kind of blanking on better ideas???#even the kids in the ‘smart’ periods are so hesitant with so many math skills#I just want to fix it but I’m basically at the end of the process. idk#my cashier job made me come in on my day off (I did clock in) to get criticized#idk how to stand up about this with a woman who can decide whether I pass or not but god I hope this isn’t going to be a pattern#she didn’t have ONE fucking good thing to say about me last week#my mom suggested that I ask for a compliment when I’m near tears because that might stave off any tears#I’m hoping her method works
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nyxypoo · 3 months ago
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going back to nubs ☹️
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homingpigecns · 1 year ago
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this is like a sadgirl pathetic post but this guy i met recently at work was like, very direct and polite in being interested in me and i've been feeling him out bc i literally do not know him well enough to have an opinion but i can't like. he is so normal and nice. hes like a nice normal guy. every time i text him he doesn't say anything weird and he's extremely nice. what the hell. he's literally so nice. WHY. does he like. me???? like what's wrong with him that he specifically is interested in me????
#this is not even a low self esteem thing but shdhsbdhsdh every girl in the world is so pretty . me??? why?????#literally the day i met him & he asked me out i barely spoke to him was mind numbingly stupid and crawled on the floor on multiple occasion#i cant text this guy bc every time i have to answer im like. this guy is so fucking normal. me??? hes interested in me???? WHY????#everyome i try to convey this to is like :// aww he thinks ur cute. stop overthinking. WHATS WRONG WITH HIM#he specifically asked me out by asking the relief nurse what my name was and she offered to give him my number if i was ok w it#I WAS AT WORK..... I JUST SAID YES...... and i was like ok this probably will not go anywhere. he probably wont even text me#he texted me while i was commuting home literally he was still doing cases........#did i mention i was digging through garbage. literally he was like sorry the surgeon yelled at u she gets so flustered and ir was like no#she yelled at me bc im stupid. did u not notice that im stupid. this guy -- NORMAL -- literally saw me at my lowest and asked me out......#brandon oscillates#brandon what abt the guy at work u had a thing for I KNOW. im so torn however sjsbdbdhdbbx we are like actually coworkers#this guy if i see him every now and then in passing occasionally in the same room. that guy is my coworker for real#it cant happen. also dbxshsdhshdhe he has a 9 yr old hes too old for me. idk his relationship status but i dont think hes married.#also hes out of my league. also my other coworker told me he thinks hes gay but that hes closeted but that coworker is filipino so#mildly homophobic. i also told him to never tell anyone else that. i dont think hes gay. whatever.#i will miss my impossible crush as my hobby but this guy is nice and ahdhs its psychopathic to give him my number and then reject his date#can u imagine#whatever. im doing high school now i guess. the relief nurse is sooo proud of herself#shdbbd literally when i came back from lunch that day my scrub was like THE DOCTOR LIKES U!!!#and i was lkke omg really??? she doesnt think im stupid???? but it was this guy. and she did still think i was stupid#u know i have concert tickets for next thursday but shdhsd i literally have had too many experiences this year#i am trying to sell tgem#personal
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cinnabeat · 5 months ago
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i love how kh games are just sometimes psychological horrors
#like#u forget it a little bit when playing bc its like haha disney and also like#the gameplay kind of breaks what the fuckness bc u got shit to do now#at least for me im like woah thats fucked up but i cant think too hard abt it bc im trying to finish the game#but its not until you like actively sit and think abt it or like even explaining it to someone else#where youre like god damn this is a tragedy and also a horror story#like fuck castle oblivion and all the horrors of com is like???#and then the prologue for kh2 is definitely a psychological horror#i see a lot of people praise sora and go aw hes so brave and strong when sora like#actively ignores literally anything bad that happens to him#like that one scene in neverland in kh1 where sora was like LITERALLY SO SAD AND UPSET ABT KAIRI#and then immediately does a u turn and is like omg i flew wait until i tell kairi :)#and some people are like aw hes being so brave and he has faith that kairi can come back and he can save her#and that made me so upset when i first saw that scene bc to me i was like immediately oh hes just repressing#or someone was even like what a good boy about him stabbing himself in the heart to save kairi#like yeah i love a self sacrifical 14 yr old#i guess cuz like. idk most stories that are like in the same genre as kh do make shit like this like a positive thing? like dont focus on th#the bad things stay positive and all that#and it works in those stories dont get me wrong i do like them and it works in the beginning of kh but like#then you notice that sora doesnt process literally anything#in the game that tells you repressing the negativity is a bad thing#like rikus whole story line staring you in the face and youre still saying sora being positive and Not Thinking about literally anything bad#is a good thing#and like i said it worked in the beginning! it worked as intended!! then weird and upsetting things started happening to sora and that shit#piles up!!!! and you can see it happen in real time and sora was cracking HARD in kh3 i dont think ive ever seen that kid so god damn sad#idk where i was going with this#oh yeah psychological horros#the parallels between data sora and real sora and the contrasts haunt me every day#michi tag
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gardenia777 · 1 year ago
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society if i wasn’t obsessed with the idea of being in a relationship
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Whenever this gets brought up my mom always says "aw I know how you feel I have body dysmorphia too :(" bro I don't have body dysmorphia I know I'm skinny and most of the time I like how I look that's not even the problem so literally just stop brining it up constantly
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pepprs · 2 years ago
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hm. i think i am going to stop going to counseling. he does not understand me. he pathologizes things that are not pathological.
#purrs#the premises of counseling / therapy are that you need to have boundaries and be self sufficient and fully healed. FUCK THAT! relationships#are not transactions. we are allowed to need each other. we are allowed to blur lines. we are human and messy. our thoughts and feelings ar#PRECIOUS. im not letting go of my thoughts they mean EVERYTHING to me they are the key to the WORLD. im not letting go of redacted why on#EARTH would i stop redacteding to redacted that is HELPFUL for me. i don’t CARE about the roots. who the fuck is it hurting????? NO ONE!!!!#the way he flat out told me he agrees with my mom. bitch im done forever. im done literaly forever. i don’t know how to tell him but im don#forever. maybe it’s just my id which is what he said to me LMFAO and like maybe i just don’t like being uncomfortable or facing hard truths#but i don’t fucking think it’s TRUE!!!!!!!!!! yeah i need to grow yeah i have unhealthy behaviors. but i don’t need to let go of the whole#THING bc of some arbitrary transactional concept of what relationships are supposed to be / mean. ive NEVER had a counselor try to uproot t#the whole damn thing like omg what is WRONG with you. i#im paying this man $25 a week to UNDERSTAND me and not ONCE have i felt understood by him. counselors can disagree with me but i literally#never feel like he is on my side. he’s adhering to conventional ideas about what parents are supposed to be and friends are supposed to be#and work is supposed to be etc etc. and so patronizingly said just enjoy being 23 you don’t wanna waste your 20s! FUCK YOU. i will not#regret anything even if it’s unusual. FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!#and also i know he probably watches back thru the recordings and has like his supervisor and professors watch them too which means that#there is a whole team of scientists + my family studying me in a lab and thinking im insane and finding ways to tell me. but fucking bold o#him to assume he can give me any meaningful valuable insight when he is actively checking his laptop / phone during our sessions and rarely#if eve gives me a chance to drive MY OWN CONVERSATION THAT IM PAYING FOR and is so phony abt being on the recording. like Omg. maybe im jus#grown out of it. it fucking SUCKS bc i actually have things i am not normal about and really need help with and i can’t actually get help f#from ppl whose job it is to fucking help me bc they think im not normal about things i PROMISEEEE i am normal about. and the way i effectiv#effectively told him that and he responded that he can’t take that credibly bc there’s no action behind it BY WHICH HE MEANS I HAVENT#STOPPED REDACTEDING TO ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT REDACTED IN MY WHOLE LIFE? THAT I HAVENT DECIDED IM DONE LEARNING SND GROWING AND CUT IT#OFF?????? DO YOU FUCKING HEAR YOURSELF. INSANE. the ANTITHESIS of human. we are MEANT TO BE CONNECTED. FUCK!!!!!!!!!#delete later#my old counselors challenged me and disagreed with me b it i never felt like they flat out were unwilling to meet me where i am and#compromise with me. is that not what counselors are supposed to do???? or have i just had bad counselors until now??? because im NORMAL. i#swear to fucking god. im normal. im literally normal and it is not doing ANYONE harm. what is wrong with you. GOD
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hardrockshrimp · 1 year ago
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I am holding up. Well.
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#WHEN I TELL YOU#i went to go piss at a jimmy johns nearby and saw Richard across the street at the bus and decided to try to talk to him#the most cheesiest 'omg are you from orbit culture' and i had my fanny pack with all the sock puppets in them#and decided to just do it now [great idea bc the venue was so small they couldnt be at the merch table after the show]#and nick was there!!!!#also ben their touring guy um#BUT NICK WAS THERE#i was like 'um i made sock puppets of you guys' and theyre both like WHAT#and this is making me think that... maybe sock puppets are a mainly american thing? someone correct me if im wrong lol#but it seems like they didnt know what the hell i was talking about#but i was like shaking putting one of them on to like. demonstrateIWKGISKVOSKJV#and nick was like oh my god like he was speechless im gonna fucking fjksigkshflajvlsof#and they were so sweet about it and let me take a picture of them with them#the openings were too small for their hands [loud breathing thinking about how big their hands are] but nick tried to put them on anyways 🥺#and ben also took a picture and posted it on the orbitculturefans ig acc EEEEEEEEEE#hes like lol look out for these in a music video like SHUT UP I WOULD DIEEEEEEE#so if i ever see these in the background of touring vlogs/stories etc i will bawl my eyes out#orbit culture#spencers little things#im so happy i decided to peer pressure my friend who can drive to take me i think they enjoyed some of it and wants to go to more shows now#but!!!!!! really hoping they do a US headline tour soon pleaseeeee i would love to see a full setlist from them#anyways this is one of the cutest things ever#also nick shook my hand before they left EEEEEEE HE WAS SO SWEET I LOVE HIMMMM STTOTOPPPPP HES MY EVERUHTJGJ
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ssorenz · 4 months ago
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LET’S HAVE THE SEX TALK, AY ⭑ .ᐟ
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syn ⊹. in which teaching your 150y/o curse boyfriend the ways of the human life (and pleasure) goes surprisingly smooth.
cont ⊹. choso kamo x fem! reader, virgin!choso, oral (giving and receiving), premature ejac, afab!reader, NSFW CONTENT minors dni!!! wc: 1k
a/n⊹. virgin choso save me virgin choso 🙏 i wanted to post this since its been sitting in the drafts for so long omg
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“baby, somethin- something’s wrong wit’ me. . .”
the half-curse invokes from your bedroom, his anxious timbre making you rush hurriedly down the hall—only to find him sat on the edge of your shared bed, blushing profusely with a small throw pillow covering his crotch.
ohhh.
you and choso had been together for about 6 months now, yet the two of you never had any sexual encounters, due to the fact that you wanted him to become more adjusted to human life before trying anything. but now with this certain issue at bay, you decided it was finally time.
you took a deep breath before recollecting yourself, taking a cushiony seat next to him, and explained to your boyfriend that what he was experiencing was utterly normal and nothing to be ashamed of.
"jus' make it stop, please. ."
oh, he doesn’t have to tell you twice.
and before you know it, you’re gravitating yourself lower, closer and closer towards his obviously growing erection. even through his pajama pants you can see how big he is. and you sure as hell weren’t wrong.
your lips form a perfect ‘o’ shape once he’s completely out of his boxers. an angry red mushroomed tip that’s practically dripping already— crystalline beads of pre down to his hefty pale base thats accented with a vein or two. and to think this was here the whole time…
“i-is something wrong?” choso inquires, a hint of worry in his tone. shifting your gaze upward, you could see his averted gaze and beet red cheeks from sheer embarrassment. you giggled softly, he was so cute when he was flustered.
“nuh uh, everything’s perfect. now, im going to do something, n’ you tell me if it feels good or not. okay?”
he swallows, before nodding eagerly in agreement, still averting his eyes from your figure below. lolling your tongue out, you licked a long warm stripe from the base to that oh-so sensitive tip of his. a poorly stifled moan could be heard from above as choso’s clawing at the downed sheets behind him, instantly stiffening up from this foreign euphoria.
"f-feels s’good," and he’s gasping out between breaths, eyes fluttering shut out of pure ecstasy. you smile around his cock, lips instinctively wrap around his sensitive head— giving small kitten licks before gradually taking more of him into your mouth. choso's hips begin to jerk up involuntarily as you begin stroking him with your tongue, the heat of your mouth making him twitch inside. a delicate hand of his finds its way entangled inside of your hair, holding you in place as if he’s beginning to lose himself completely, giving in to the bliss.
choso's resounding moans become more and more frequent as you work your way down, taking more of him into your mouth with each pass. his hips beginning to thrust upwards, meeting the rhythm of your bobbing head.
he dares to open his eyes— and that was his biggest mistake.
seeing you on your knees, eyes virtually glowing with pure lust in this low lighting, gazing up at him ever so tenderly yet seductively. taking him down your throat with little to no effort, god it was enough to make him-
“sh-shiitt!” and ropes of his warm essence are rudely painting the back of your throat as he’s spasming in your mouth, cum trickling down onto your tongue when he pulls out. his breathing is still uneven, chest rising and falling rapidly as he’s trying to recover while you’re sitting pretty with a coy grin plastered on your face. “how was that, cho? did it fee—”
“w-wanna try it on you… please?”
and now the roles are reversed, your legs hooked over his shoulders as he’s kneeling infront of your bare cunny.
he leans in, warm breath tickling against your inner thighs, nervously dangling his tongue out before swiftly flicking it just on your clitoris, causing you to groan.
and that first taste has him hooked. he latches himself onto the bud of your clit, similarly to how you did moments prior. it’s barely been seconds and he’s delved nose-deep into your wetness. he wasn’t all that sure about what he was doing, but telling from the way you were so vocal, mantras of his name echoing throughout his ears, he was doing a damn good job.
there was that feeling yet again— that strain in his boxers as his crotch pooled with a familiar warmth. he looked down and sure enough, there was again a strained tent pitched in his pants.
and his body's moving faster than his mind, his hand’s already snaked down to his boxers, palming himself through the cottony fabric. muffled guttural groans evading through parted lips as he’s drinking up your candily sweet juices, all while his hand’s wrapped around his stiffened length. trying so hard to replicate the sensation of your warm, wet mouth that was just present moments ago.
hips stuttering in sync with his rhythms, as your hand is engulfed in his ravenated strands, broken cacophonous moans of his name string from your mouth as your grinding along the heat of his tongue—leaving your pussy drooling, glassy slick dripping down the man's coated chin.
"haah—ch-cho, doin' so good..." your praise only riles him up even more, his pace picking up, becoming more and more lost in a daze. tongue darting in and out of your cunt with quick precision, teasing every sensitive spot it managed to find.
you feel your stomach tightening, the creeping sensation of your climax approaching ever so hurriedly. and it hits you like a crashing wave as one final thrust from choso’s tongue puts you right over the edge, body shuddering as it washes over you.
he can’t hold back much longer either as his cock is aching. and with a few last frantic, sloppy jerks, he finally pulls away from your cunt as loads of his cum spill into his boxers.
gasping for air himself, he looks up at you through strands of his sweaty hair before proposing the question that makes even your worn-out expression morph into something much more fitting— shocked, if you will.
“c-can we go again?”
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ssorenz™ 2024, do not repost, translate or copy.
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yrieso · 2 years ago
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parents w no dance experience stop trying to teach your child the steps during class just because it’s visitors week and you’re allowed to sit in class and watch challenge
#UGH it was AWFUL with one mom in particular#she kept giving her daughter directions and telling her what do to and where to go#like lady you've never danced before PLUS you don't know the dance PLUS IM the teacher PLUS you're disrupting other students#PLUS you're annoying me AND ALSO you're wrong about the steps too and ugh#and then. omg. in that tap class the teacher i apprentice under and i were trying to explain#''yeah the kids are off the rhythm for this song (we will rock u) and we dont know#why they're so off or when it started so please show them grace bc#we've done everything we can think of to fix it but they're not getting it#but we'll keep trying until they get it'' and the second#she said ''we don't know when it happened but all of the sudden they're off''#that mom said ''it's been going on for awhile''#LADY. SHUT UUUPPP. how do you know that? hm? you're not even here!#you drop ur kid off (way too early btw) and LEAVE. ugh.#that was awful and her kid is in 3 classes so we had to deal with it all night#annoying! annoying! i hate visitors week at dance! i hate it!#and i have to substitute for another teacher on thursday#and i have never subbed for her before so idk what to do really#and it's only two classes but it's still stressful bc i'll be by myself and#i don't know their dance so i can't really do much other than watch and correct their technique#and do some across the floors? bc i don't even know their warm ups but we can't use the barres anyway#bc the chairs for visitors are against the walls w barres#so that's gonna be. ugh.#at least i get paid for that bc i only get paid when i sub by myself even tho the pay is ass#its fine. only two classes. sigh.#yriesodottumblrdotcom#dance tag#tag rambles
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rafecameronsslut4ever · 2 months ago
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CASUAL pt.2— lando norris (angst)
pairing; fem!reader x lando norris summary: it took lando too long to realise it wasn't just 'casual'. warnings: a LOT of angst, toxic relationship, sexual implication, not proofread a/n: casual part 2 was not really a part of the plan but the audience had demands 🦧also i think this was too long lmao. AND IM SO SORRY FOR THE LONG DELAY OMG
part 1 - casual
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miami grand prix: the biggest pr nightmare for every driver—especially lando norris.
the media had been all over him that weekend, going to the lengths of literally calling him 'the hottest catch on the single market'. hollywood stars and instagram models were so desperate to marry him and have his kids that they didn't catch on the fact that he was a 23-year-old racing driver who couldn't give a fuck about them.
because he was stuck on you.
for weeks, he'd waited—hoping you’d reach out, or at the very least, watch his instagram stories. he posted shirtless photos, sun-kissed photos—hell, he even threw out a thirst trap just for you. But you didn’t take the bait. you didn't take the fucking bait.
you hadn't texted him or spoken to him since the moment you walked out of that hotel room weeks ago, so he didn't try to reach out either. "would've been a blow to my ego," he'd told sainz.
but now, he didn't give a shit about his ego. he was tired of waiting.
his eyes darted across the packed club, friends and guests scattered all around. he couldn't wait to get out of there.
he hadn't been drinking. didn't really feel like it. truth be told, he hadn’t been feeling much of anything at all.
pool parties, clubs, yachts, champagne and girls.
he was tired of the glitz and glam of his life, and you were the only escape from it.
but you were gone.
his mind wandered to that morning, when you had kissed him and the two of you had ordered room service. when he had held you for the last time.
he hated how the only thing on his mind was you. how it was the only thing on his mind all through the celebrations, as hookers danced around him and people tried to pour drinks into his mouth.
for fuck's sake, he had won a grand prix for the first time in his life, and yet he was unhappy.
how did he get here?
he looked up, eyes falling on a group of men in the VIP section, the lights illuminating their faces.
everyone could tell something was off with lando. he didn't want to do any of this.
all he wanted was you. you, you, you.
the girl who had left without an explanation.
why had you left, anyway? no calls, no texts. your friends avoided him, and you avoided his friends. it was like the two of you were nothing.
lando norris was many things, but he was not a fool. he could recognise when something was wrong, or when a situation had escalated beyond his control.
he knew that there was a reason why you left, but the reason never clicked in that thick brain of his. what had he done wrong? where had he gone wrong?
"i'm not feeling too well, mate." he muttered, handing the beer bottle back to the guy standing next to him.
okay, maybe not admitting his feelings for you had fucked things up. but, what could you expect? he didn't have the time to give you what you deserved.
not right now, at least.
lando norris had the world on his fingertips. he could have any girl he wanted. anyone, really.
"what are you waiting for, then?" the other man asked, shoving his hands into his pockets.
"what?"
"just call her, bro. i know it's about a girl because there's no way any sane man would say no to expensive beers and a million hot hookers."
did lando even know this man? probably not.
"i can't call her. she doesn't want to talk to me. trust me, i've tried."
"have you?"
he didn't know how to deal with rejection. not like this, not with you. you weren't supposed to leave.
"judging by your sulkiness, i doubt you're going to find a girl like her again. and you'll never have her if you're here."
lando didn't have a heart of stone, as much as his social media persona might suggest. he didn't care for any of this. the women, the money, the fame.
he wanted to hold you again. kiss you, tell you he loves you. he wanted to hold your hand. he wanted to be near you, and only you.
so, when his feet hit the floor and he found himself walking towards the exit, he wasn't surprised.
yeah, it was foolish of him to leave a party full of women who were celebrating him (literally) for a girl who had ghosted him, but the need was stronger than his pride.
out of the yacht, he was dialling the only number he'd ever memorised. the phone rang, and then it rang again.
would she be wearing his clothes, or would she have gotten rid of everything related to him?
maybe she'd found another man, finally realising that lando was a bad investment.
as the phone rang, you were hidden in your apartment with blankets wrapped around you and a youtube video playing in the background.
it had been months since you'd heard the word 'casual' leave his mouth. months since you had fled london and monaco to move to miami.
at first, his words had echoed in your mind constantly, and you'd cried yourself to sleep a few times more than you'd like to admit.
but just like every heartbroken poet in history, the hurt faded and the pain slowly morphed into hatred. and anger.
you wanted to slam your head against a wall. scratch that, you wanted to slam his head against a wall.
it was so stupid, and you hated yourself for believing he'd been genuine.
it was just sex. that's all it ever was. it truly was just casual.
the phone was still ringing. your finger hesitated over the answer button. you weren't going to answer it.
it wasn't worth it. you didn't want to hear his voice. didn't want him to have the satisfaction of knowing that his words had hurt you. you didn't want to know if he was sleeping around, if his girlfriends were prettier than you.
so the line went dead.
lando stood by the harbour, watching as yachts and ships sailed past him. the air was humid and his t-shirt clung to his body, the heat almost unbearable. the sound of waves, the distant laughter and music, and the sound of his ragged breaths.
he ran his fingers through his hair, looking around. where was his car?
he had to find his way back to his hotel. he was a mess, and his clothes were sticking to his skin. he needed to fix his appearance, buy a bouquet a flowers.
he checked the time on his watch, and cursed as he saw the numbers. it was almost 3 am. he wouldn't find flowers anywhere at 3 am.
"fuck it." he said, running over to his car. the drive was quiet, save for the low hum of music and his occasional swearing when someone drove a little bit slower than he'd like.
lando norris had the world on his fingertips. he could have any girl he wanted. anyone, really. but he only wanted you. he was a hopeless romantic, and you were his muse.
when he pulled up outside the apartment, his nerves were going haywire. he ran a hand through his hair and took a deep breath before getting out of the car.
he knocked twice on the door and when it opened, his eyes lit up.
you stared back at him, sleepiness in your eyes and confusion etched on your face.
and god, did you look gorgeous.
he loved you, he realised. he had to cross his hands behind his back to stop them from reaching out and holding you close.
"lando?" you breathed out.
he had grown a slight stubble since you last saw him. his hair were still the same, except a little bit longer. his blue eyes were wide as he looked at you.
"hey," his voice was shaky.
"what the fuck are you doing here?"
he wanted to say so many things. ask you why you left, where it went wrong, why you moved to miami. he wanted to declare his love for you, press his lips to yours, hold you by the waist. he wanted to hear you say that you loved him too.
he was so in love with you, and you had no idea.
"lando? why are you here?" you asked again.
he was at a loss of words. what could he say? he couldn't exactly just stand there and say nothing.
"because," his voice cracked, "i miss you."
your throat went dry. he could not just say that.
it had been weeks. weeks of him not contacting you, weeks of you not speaking to him. the phone calls had stopped, the text messages had stopped, the late night chats had stopped. everything was just gone.
and now, he missed you?
tears welled up in your eyes, a lump forming in your throat. you shook your head, pushing back the tears, "go away."
"what? no, wait. wait. don't do this." he pleaded, his voice fragile and desperate, like a child trying to avoid bedtime.
"lando-"
he interrupted you, voice louder than before. "can we please talk about this?"
"what is there to talk about?" you were raising your voice. you hated him. how could he act like this after all that happened?
"everything. just—please, can i come in?" he sounded so pathetic. he felt so pathetic. his hands were slightly hovering over the door, ready to push it open and walk in.
the request took you by surprise. "i-no."
you missed him. there was no denying that.
you wanted him to tell you it was okay. wanted to go back to that night in his mclaren, the night he told you he liked you. wanted the weekends spent in london with his family. you wanted him, all of him.
his curly hair wrapped around your fingers, blue eyes staring at you, soft lips kissing you. his cold hands grabbing yours, and his voice saying your name. you wanted it to not be casual.
"i just want to talk to you."
he was drunk. there was no other way he would've showed up here, let alone begged to talk to you. the fact that he needed to be drunk to have this conversation made your blood boil.
"do you still have my jacket?"
of course, you still had his stupid jacket. the one that had his smell embedded into the fabric. it was an exclusive print mclaren had given him, and he had swung it around your shoulders after the night you had first made love to each other.
but he didn't care about the jacket, and neither did you. it was just a reminder.
you were silent for a while, taking in the sight of each other. it was his breath mingling with yours.
"i love you." he whispered.
your breath hitched in your throat, the tears finally falling out of your eyes as you sighed.
"i love you," he repeated to himself. "yes, i do. and i've known that since the day i met you."
you choked back sobs as you shook your head, "you're drunk, lando."
"i'm not," he chuckled, "maybe a little, but not enough."
then, he added, "i mean it. i love you." his voice was steady. he truly meant every word. but he didn't know what would happen now.
"what do you want me to say, lando?"
he sighed, "anything."
you laughed bitterly. anything, he said.
anything would've been better than what had happened.
"i don't think i can do this, lando."
"we can take it slow."
"you've never done slow."
he fell silent again because you were right. he'd never done slow. he didn't know how to take things slow. he was a fucking formula 1 driver, after all. slow wasn't something he did. he'd always lived life like it was the last day. and that's how he had lost you.
"i'm sorry," he began, his voice breaking. "i should've been a better person. i'm sorry for everything i did. i should've given you more, i-i should've loved you more, because you deserve so much more. i'm so, so, sorry."
"lando," you whispered, "it's not—"
"don't make excuses for me, please. i love you, i realy do. and if i have to spend the rest of my life proving that, i will." and he meant every word. "i just want you back."
your mind was racing, a million thoughts running through it. it was like a movie. his blue eyes, his voice, the desperation in his tone, the way he stood before you.
"okay," you muttered.
"wait, okay? does that mean—"
"you're gonna have to work for this," you said.
"i know, and i will. i promise."
you sighed, rubbing your temple. this wasn't a good idea. "get in."
lando's face lit up, and before you could change your mind, he had walked into the apartment. he hadn't really been here before, considering you moved here after the two of you had stopped talking. but the apartment was lovely, homely. everything you.
you closed the door behind him, watching him look around the living room.
"how'd you know where i live?"
he chuckled, turning to face you. "i'm a famous driver. i have my sources."
"i'm sure." a tense silence followed, neither of you knowing what to say.
"i'm not letting this happen again," he blurted, "i'm not. i don't know how, but i won't."
"i don't believe you." you scoffed.
"fuck, baby, what do i have to do for you to believe me?" he stepped towards you, closing the distance.
"stop calling me that."
"you are my baby." he tried to joke.
"lando, i'm not joking."
"i'm serious too," his voice was sincere, "i love you, and i'll do whatever it takes for you to believe me."
you had been through a lot together. the highs, the lows. you had seen him at his best, and at his worst. the good and the bad.
he moved closer, reaching a hand out to hold yours. you didn't know why, but the moment his hand touched yours, it was like a switch had flipped inside of you.
you let his hand wander over yours like a ghost, his calloused fingertips tracing over your knuckles. he intertwined your fingers together, eyes casted down.
"i've never cared about anyone the way i care about you." he admitted in a soft voice.
and then he pressed his lips to yours. his other hand wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to him.
and god, did he taste the same. lando had a way with his lips. it was a talent. he kissed you like he needed your lips to survive. he was desperate for your touch as if he had been starving without it.
you were so lost in the feeling that you hadn't realised how far you had pushed him until the back of his knees hit the couch, and he fell on top of it.
his eyes were wide, mouth hanging open. his shirt was halfway unbuttoned, exposing his chest and toned abs.
the two of you stared at each other, eyes searching the other's.
"i love you." he murmured for what seemed like the hundredth time that night.
maybe it was the way his blue eyes bore into yours, or the way his lips quivered, or maybe it was the fact that he had driven across the city to say this.
but for the first time that night, you believed him. suddenly, the anger was gone. it was all gone.
"i love you, too." you whispered.
it was the only thing the two of you needed. the confirmation, the reassurance. the love.
you leaned down and connected your lips once more, hand reaching up to his curls and tugging lightly. he moaned into the kiss, pulling you on top of him.
your tongue entered his mouth, the taste of him making you lightheaded. his hands roamed over your body, the feeling of his skin against yours.
"baby," he whispered between kisses, "i want you so bad. i've waited so long."
his lips trailed along your jaw and down your neck, sucking marks into the sensitive skin.
"i want you," he murmured against the crook of your neck, "so fucking bad."
but he pulled away, flipping the two of you over so he was on top of you. he took off his shirt, and rested his head on your chest. he cleared his throat, "i should've asked this question earlier, but are you single?"
"yeah." you chuckled, running a hand through his curls.
"so, can i be your boyfriend?"
"lando norris," you hummed, "did you finally get the guts to ask me out?"
"yes," he smiled, lifting his head up to look at you, "yes, i did. will you be my girlfriend?"
"you're a dork."
"that's not an answer."
"yes," you laughed, "yes, i'll be your girlfriend."
lando grinned, and you grinned back.
it wasn't casual anymore.
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(u guys im so sorry if i've tagged someone who doesnt want to be tagged i just had no idea how to let non-followers know part 2 is out bcs tumblr is not letting me reply to comments😭if anyone wants their tag removed, feel free to dm me!! i hope u liked this) @oscarpiassrri @meglouise00 @f1fantasys @technicallypleasanttree @ggaslyp1 @obxstiles @nataliambc @prudyhoo @idkwtdwml123 @ushygushybaby @emilyroxy @yootvi @fishingarden @pillowprincess4him @herexpertcollector
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