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gilbertandanne · 8 years ago

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AU College Fic. Farkle never figured out how Riley really felt about Lucas, so it never got out. Now she’s turning 21 and the gang decides to go to Las Vegas to celebrate. Sometimes what happens in Vegas doesn’t always stay in Vegas.

Rating: M (because of language, situations, and it’s Vegas, soooo yeah)

Pairing: Rucas

Word Count: 8,789

Cross-posted at ff.net

| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | J | Q | K | A | J |

A/N: 21 definitely has more than one meaning as it pertains to this story.

Chapter Four: The Devil’s Bedpost

As soon as the 8-ball easily skidded into the corner pocket, Maya shook her head. “Is there a sport that you aren’t abnormally good at?”

Lucas smirked as he looked up at her. “It was a lucky shot.”

She narrowed her eyes at him as her frown deepened. She couldn’t handle ‘Mr. Modest’ right now, especially with the current winning streak he was on. “You’ve won the last four games.”

He chuckled as he leaned against the pool cue. “Pappy Joe taught me how to play a long time ago.” He glanced at the quiet brunette in the corner. His smile slowly faded as he watched her type something out on her phone. Was she texting someone? Who could she be possibly texting when it was 4am in New York? He sighed as he turned back to Maya. He had hoped that this trip would somehow afford them a chance to talk, to get reacquainted, to bridge the gap that had been rapidly expanding over the last two years. He hadn’t felt that close to her since they were in middle school, but her distance as of late had set him on edge. Finding out about the trip through their friends and not through her had sent him into a perpetual state of pensiveness over the last two months. Why was she being distant?

“You should go on the road with that act,” Maya told him as she reached for the rack. “You could make some good money by being a pool shark.” She walked around the table as she pulled the balls from the pockets. She stopped suddenly as an idea came to her. “Hey! It could pay your way through vet school.”

Lucas reached for his drink. He had no idea just how much alcohol he had consumed over the course of the last several hours. He had stopped for a while when they were bowling and when they ate some pizza. He knew that he was currently on his second drink since they started playing pool. Before that though, he wasn’t sure. He didn’t feel drunk. He was buzzed and felt a little more relaxed than he did when they first arrived, but that wasn’t saying much. His eyes drifted back to Riley before he sat his drink down. “One thing you’ll probably learn while we’re here is that the house always wins.” He rotated the pool cue in his hands. “It’s only a matter of time.”

Maya snickered at him. “I thought drinking would loosen you up a little,” she sighed, “but you’re still dealing out these little pearls of wisdom that no one asks for.”

He shook his head as he released a soft chuckle. “And that you’ll never listen to.”

Riley sipped her drink she listened to their banter. Zay had disappeared behind the bar for a few minutes, which left Riley alone to witness Lucas and Maya’s playful exchange. She wasn’t jealous, at least that’s what she told herself. It reminded her of how they used to act around one another in middle school—before they became boyfriend and girlfriend. Was there something more there? Were there some unresolved feelings? As far as Riley knew, Maya had no interest in him romantically, but did he still have feelings for her? Maya’s observation about the type of girls Lucas seemed to be attracted to rang through Riley’s mind. ‘This is ridiculous,’ she thought as she drank the rest of her margarita. She wasn’t sure how much she had, but she knew it wasn’t enough. She was still on edge around him. As Lucas and Maya started another game, Riley stood up and quietly left the room. ‘The whole point of this trip was to not think about this,’ she sighed as she wandered toward the bar.

“You do not look happy,” Zay told her as he poured some tequila into a glass. “Did Lucas win again?”

“Yeah,” she gave him a half smile as she sat down. “What are you making?”

“Just a little something for the soon to be birthday girl,” he placed the shot in front of her.

Riley looked at the glass skeptically. “A tequila shot?” She wanted to feel numb. She didn’t want to black out.

He smirked. “You look a little tired. Figured you needed a little boost.”

She ran a hand through her hair. Though she wasn’t technically 21 yet, she was aware of her limits when it came to alcohol. Watching Lucas and Maya tease one another, no matter how innocent it was, definitely killed whatever buzz she thought she had. She knew she had no claim on the Texan, and had endured far worse over the years, but seeing them together brought back a barrage of emotions she thought she had buried. “I don’t know. Maybe I should just go to bed, you know? It’s almost 1am as it is and we…we have to get up in five hours.”

“Or…you could refuel a little bit, maybe eat some more of that pizza in the kitchen.” He paused. He could tell that there was something on her mind. He didn’t want to see her go to bed unhappy. “You know I’m right, Riles. I was right about that pizza, and I’m right about this too.”

If she went to bed, she knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep. She could hear Lucas and Maya laughing in the next room. She knew the sound would echo through her mind as she was unwillingly forced to take a stroll down middle school hell memory lane. The two months her best friend dated Lucas were two of the longest months of her life. Every single day she had to pretend to be happy for them, while trying to hide her real feelings from them both, and now, here she sat, desperately trying to brace herself for the possibility that it was happening all over again. The only difference now was that her feelings for Lucas ran so much deeper than they did back then. Maya knew about her feelings for Lucas, that was also a change from last time, but Riley knew that if something was developing between the two, she wouldn’t be the reason why they didn’t reconcile—if that was what was happening.

It was all too much for 1:00 in the morning. She was jet lagged and in close proximity to the guy she had been emotionally running away from for seven years. How was she going to survive the next few days?

Riley reached for the glass before she could second-guess herself. Zay was right. She had to drink more. The pizza had sobered her up too much. It allowed her the time to absorb everything that was transpiring around her. She wanted to drown out all of the voices in her head that screamed at her that she would forever be in love with Lucas Friar. She needed to dive back under the water and try to figure out a way to get through the next few days without completely drowning in her emotions.

She cringed as she sat the glass back down. “Yeah. I needed that,” she wheezed before she coughed. Once she cleared her throat, she nudged the glass towards him. One wouldn’t be enough. If she was going to stay up, she needed another. “I need more.”

“Farkle is going to kill me tomorrow,” Zay chuckled as he poured another shot.

Riley placed her hands on the counter as she watched Zay fill up the glass. “We’re still young. We can run off of very little sleep, right?”

“So what now,” Lucas asked the group as they lounged on the couches in the living room. They had played half a dozen rounds of pool and bowled several games. He figured they would all want to crash soon, but he wasn’t about to be the first person to leave. The feeling that something was going to happen still nagged at him. He wouldn’t feel at peace until he knew she was asleep.

Riley glanced at Zay before she tossed a piece of popcorn at him. “I think we’re losing Babineaux,” she chuckled.

“Nah, nah,” he said as he yawned. “I’m just resting my eyes.”

“I’m tapped out,” Maya said as she laid across from Riley. When Riley offered her the bowl of popcorn, she took it. As she popped a piece into her mouth, she looked up at the ceiling. “I can’t think of any other good games we haven’t played yet.”

Riley pursed her lips as she glanced around the living room. Finally, her eyes fell on an empty beer bottle on the coffee table. For some strange reason, she reached for it. As she picked at the label, she smirked as her moderately tipsy brain remembered one other game they could play. Her eyes lifted to look at Lucas. What were the odds that it would happen again?

Maya watched the brunette for a moment before an evil gleam crossed her eyes. She knew exactly what was running through Riley’s mind. She just needed a friendly push to get it started. Farkle was asleep and Zay was almost passed out. No one would be the wiser in case it didn’t work out. “I’ve got it,” she grinned as she sat up.

Riley and Lucas looked at her. “What,” Riley asked as she looked back down at the bottle.

Maya gestured to the bottle. “A time honored classic, but,” she glanced across the suite, “with a twist.”

Riley had no idea what the blonde was getting at until she looked back up at Maya. She merely grinned as she stared at the object in Riley’s hands. “Spin the bottle?” The brunette sat up. The last thing she wanted to do was play spin the bottle. There would only be three participants and she wasn’t about to partake in a game that could end up with her best friend kissing the guy she had feelings for. “Maya, there are only three of us,” she tried to reason. She glanced at Zay once more. “Zay is completely out.”

Maya looked at him. If everything fell as she knew it would, they wouldn’t need his help. She only needed one spin. Everything else would take care of itself. It was perfect. “We can wake him up when it’s his turn…and I’m not talking about spin the bottle.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Seven minutes in heaven…but instead of a closet,” she turned away as she looked at the darkened room at the back of the living room, “we use the hot tub.” When she spun back around, she was met with disinterested looks from both Riley and Lucas. She rolled her eyes as she stood up. All they needed was a nudge. She was certain that the Texan had feelings for Riley. It was past time for one of them to finally make a move. “Come on…we know we don’t have to actually do anything…but we haven’t gotten in the hot tub yet, and I don’t know…it’ll give us a chance to talk one-on-one.” She raised her eyebrows as she waited for their answer.

Riley sighed. “I’m not sure that this is such a good—“

Maya raised a hand to stop her. “I’m sorry, but we are in Las Vegas and we are all adults here. Logic left the room around 9:30 when the King of Logic went to bed. I don’t know about you guys, but I think it would be nice to visit our teenage-hood one more time.” When Riley and Lucas made no move to say anything, Maya frowned. “If you’re both too scared to do it, then—“

“I’m not scared,” Riley told her as she stood up. She knew that Maya only said that to bait her, but Riley didn’t care. She had gotten her buzz back and if she were ever going to play this stupid game, it would be on this trip.

“Good,” Maya smiled before she faced Lucas. She knew that she would get a much better grasp on his feelings by his willingness to play her game. “What about you, Huckleberry? Going to go to bed to leave me, Riley, and Zay to duke it out or are you in?”

“I haven’t backed out of anything yet,” he answered evenly.

“I’ll take that as an enthusiastic ‘yes’, then.” Maya turned back to Riley. “It’s your birthday. You get the first spin.”

“Fine.” Before she even sat the bottle down, Riley knew exactly where it would land. She knew because it was Maya’s game and because fate, destiny, or whatever force that seemed anxious to destroy her always wanted to throw what she couldn’t have in her face. She took a deep breath before she spun it. Even though she knew what was about to happen, it still felt like an eternity before the bottle stopped its rotation. When it finally did, she lifted her eyes as the bottle landed on the one person she was the most scared of being alone with.

As Lucas closed the doors behind them, he could have sworn he heard Maya laughing. If he lived to be a hundred, he would never understand her. He shook his head as he turned around. He stopped dead in his tracks as he watched Riley lift her tank top over her head. He was certain that the last time he saw her in a bathing suit was right after high school graduation. They all had taken a trip to Texas and had gone swimming at the lake on the edge of his grandfather’s property. He thought for sure they would reconnect on that trip, but she and Maya were attached at the hip the entire time.

He took swig of his drink to try to steady his quaking nerves. ‘This isn’t a big deal,’ he reminded himself as he watched her place her shirt on the bench by the hot tub. The electric pink bikini she wore contrasted perfectly with her olive complexion. It was taking every ounce of strength he had not to reach for her in that exact moment. He rubbed the back of his neck as he sat his drink down on the counter on the far wall.

Riley sat her phone down on top of her shirt. She seemed to be completely oblivious to the effect she was having on the anxious Texan. “This shouldn’t be too bad, right? Seven minutes in a hot tub.”

“Yeah,” he agreed as he turned around to face her once more. He watched in wonderment as she shimmied out of her gym shorts. ‘Stop staring. Stop staring. Stop being a creep.’ He knew he had to distract himself while she got situated.

Once she was in the water, he hoped that he would be able calm his suddenly raging hormones and quiet the lustful thoughts that came charging toward him as she undressed. He cleared his throat as he walked over to the window to pull the curtains back. He gave himself a minute to compose himself before he spoke. “I can’t get over this view.”

“It’s pretty incredible, isn’t it,” she responded as she slowly dipped her toes into the water. She was still completely oblivious to the effect she had on him. “I still can’t believe we are here and in a suite like this,” she added as she slowly sank underneath the water. She reached for her drink, which sat at the edge of the tub. “It all feels like a dream right now, you know? I feel like I’m going to wake up tomorrow and be forced to walk through the freezing cold in order to get to my bio final.”

“It definitely feels like a dream,” he mumbled as his eyes lingered on the city lights below them. He reached for the hem of his shirt before he lifted the garment over his head.

Riley tilted her head to the side as she admired the way his muscles rippled across his back as he took his t-shirt off. It had been nearly two years since the last time she saw him without a shirt on, and her memory did not do him justice. She knew he had been working out a lot more lately, but she hadn’t been able to notice a difference until now. Her lips parted slightly as he turned around and tossed his shirt to the corner of the room. She counted eight abs on his torso as he slowly sunk his toes into the water.

She blinked several times as she quickly tried to figure out if she was openly drooling by the mere the sight of him. ‘Great job on making it not awkward, Riley,’ she mentally chastised herself. She cleared her throat as she sat her drink next to the tub. She reached for her phone as she set an alarm for seven minutes. “I thought it would be a lot like the city, you know? Lights and traffic everywhere.” She placed her phone on the edge of the tub before she turned to face him.

“Well,” he chuckled as his body slowly sank underneath the hot water, “it is. Just a lot more neon than we’re used to.”

“Not to mention that the desert is right there too. It’s crazy that you can see where the city ends and the desert begins from our room.” She paused as she glanced out the window. She couldn’t see that definitive line from where she sat. She could only see the bright lights of America’s Playground. “I wonder if you can see the stars out there.”

“I’m sure you can,” he answered as he craned his neck to look out the window. After a moment, he turned back to her. “I’m sure it’s like Texas. Once you get away from the lights, you’ll be able to see the entire night sky.”

“Hmm,” she contemplated as she reached for her drink once more. “I wonder if we can go out there one night…try to see them. I really miss seeing the stars.”

“It’s your trip. Whatever the birthday girl wants, the birthday girl gets,” he smiled.

‘I wish,’ she thought to herself as she sat her drink down. After about ten seconds of excruciatingly painful silence, she pressed the home button on her phone. This had to be almost over, right? “Six minutes to go.”

Lucas waved his hands around under the water as he tried to think of something to say to her. They had already made small talk. He could ask her about Steve, but he knew he wasn’t prepared to hear the answer to that particular question. He wasn’t hammered, but he was definitely intoxicated enough to say something he knew he would regret in the morning. “This whole thing so ridiculous,” he finally said to her. “The five of us have been friends forever. I doubt anything could change between us in seven minutes that hasn’t changed in the last seven years.”

She slowly nodded as she felt a pang in her chest. Of course he would feel that way. Even in a romantic setting, he wouldn’t ever want anything to happen between them, and maybe he was right. Nothing had changed between them in seven years, although she could have sworn that they came pretty close a few times. She knew that the next six minutes would be filled with more awkward small talk and even more uncomfortable silence. It was excruciating. “Yeah. We’re friends.”

He reached for his jack and coke. “Yeah,” he took a long swig as he considered his next words. “I’m your brother, remember?” Maybe he shouldn’t have said it, but there were only so many impulses he could control in his intoxicated state.

Riley hated that word, at least when it came to describing her relationship with the guy she sat across from. ‘Brother’ was the exact opposite of how she felt about him. She saw all of the others as members of her family, but not him. It was always different with him.

Seven years after that stupid comment, and she was forever forced to endure the label she had placed on their relationship. “Yeah. It would be too weird to…after so long…” she trailed off before she frowned. She wasn’t sure if it was the heat from the tub, the alcohol in her system, or the fact that she knew she was at the end of her rope, but something Maya mentioned to her at Zay’s birthday party had been nagging the brunette for months. Witnessing the playful interactions he had with her best friend earlier still lingered in her mind. If they were going to talk for the next four minutes, then maybe she could at least gain a little clarity about one aspect of her predicament. “Lucas, can I ask you something?”

He looked away from her as he sat his drink back down. “Sure.”

Riley subconsciously licked her bottom lip as she tried to brace herself for his response. She couldn’t believe she was about to ask him this. She had never really asked him anything about his love life before. It was too weird, not to mention the fact that she didn’t want to inflict any more pain than necessary on her beaten heart. “Maya told me that…that you have a type…that the girls you date look…well, that they look like me.” When he didn’t flinch, she continued, “I don’t see it, but…when she brought it up…it made me wonder because…because I’ve never really seen you with someone who didn’t have dark eyes and dark hair.” As his eyes slowly looked up into hers, she took a shaky breath. “Is there something to that?”

Lucas thought his heart had suddenly stopped beating. Out of everything she could have possibly asked, she decided to ask about his love life? He thought for sure that they would talk about the most basic things as they always had: school, weather, childhood memories, or food. He had no idea where to begin or even what to tell her. Leave it to Maya to figure out his pattern. He didn’t even realize his affinity for brown-eyed brunettes until Zay pointed it out a year ago. Should he confess what he thought was the reasoning behind it? Should he reach for her, swear that it had always only been her—that he only went out with other girls because that was what she told him to do, that he was trying to respect her wishes? Should he finally admit the feelings he had been forced to suppress for the last seven years?

Riley was beginning to regret her question as she waited for his answer. Was Maya right? Did he have a type? Was he transfixed on dark haired, dark eyed girls because he was in love with someone else? She twisted her hair tie around her wrist as she waited for him to answer. “Is it…is it because you still have feelings for Maya or something?”

The corner of his mouth lifted into a half smile. If she only knew. “No,” he answered as he reached for his drink once more. If their conversation was going to go any deeper, he would need all of the help he could get in order to calm his unstable nerves.

The brunette frowned as his answer only frustrated her more. If that wasn’t it, then what was it? She could tell that something was on his mind. She was a jumble of nerves as she waited for him to elaborate. When he didn’t, she slid the hair tie off her wrist as she pulled her hair up into a messy bun. The ends of her hair were already wet, but she didn’t care. The act only served as a distraction—something to do in order to keep herself from climbing out the tub and running to her room. “Talk to me. We’re friends, right? You know that you can tell me anything…don’t you?” She wasn’t sure she wanted to hear the truth, but it did bother her that he seemed uncomfortable around her. She knew it was her fault. She had been pushing him away for a long time now, but in her inebriated state, the thought of him actually pulling away from her was unsettling.

He finished the rest of his drink as he thought about what to say. He said nothing until he sat the glass back down and turned to face her. “Riley, we haven’t been that close since I rode Tombstone…since you told me the truth about how you felt about me.” He glanced around the room. “I mean…you didn’t even think to invite me to this…and I’m pretty sure you never would have if the guys didn’t mention it.” Maybe it was harsh, but if she wanted him to be honest with her, then this was the only place to start.

“Yes, I would have,” she frowned as she considered her own words. Would she have invited him if he hadn’t overheard the guys talking about it? All she wanted was to get away. She wanted to not think about anything for a few days, and she knew that if he came, he would invade most of her thoughts. She sighed. “It’s just…I…I…”

Hearing her stumble over her words pierced his heart harder than whatever she could possibly be keeping from him. “What?”

She couldn’t do it. “I can’t…I can’t tell you.”

“That’s my point. We can’t talk to each other…and Riley…I hate that we can’t.” The dam he had been able to maintain for so long finally cracked as he was forced to face the reality that they were practically strangers now. “For a long time, I thought that we could…be close, but…I feel like the older we get, the more distant we become. What happens after graduation? Are we just going to go our separate ways and only see each other at high school reunions?”

Riley shook her head. She hadn’t thought that far ahead. “No. Of course not. I can’t…I can’t imagine my world without you in it.” Despite everything, she knew she didn’t want him to disappear from her world. At the same time, she had to figure out a way to get over him for once and for all.

“You say that, but Riley…I know nothing that’s going on with you.” ‘Like who you’re dating or the last movie you saw or your favorite song on the radio.’ The distance that separated them was what was killing him. He figured out years ago that he would rather be in her orbit as a friend—and watch her live her life on the sidelines—than to be completely kicked out of her solar system. She was the damn sun and he needed whatever warmth she could provide. He had lived in the darkness for far too long. He needed her in order to grow, to survive—even if it was just as a friend.

She shrugged. “What do you want to know?” It was a dangerous question, but she was tired of hiding. She knew it was the alcohol talking, but if he was going to ask, then the least she could do was answer.

He looked into her eyes. “What are you thinking about right now?”

She laughed. There was no way that he wanted to know what was rolling around in her intoxicated brain at that exact moment. Even she couldn’t believe the memories she was recalling as they sat in the hot tub. “The truth?”

He loved the sound of her laughter. If this could be the first step toward a different kind of friendship between them, then he was more than willing to listen to whatever she had to say. “Please.”

“I’m…thinking about Darby’s sixteenth birthday party.” She waited for him to give her a confused look. When he didn’t, she leaned back in the tub. Already she was beginning to feel more comfortable around him. “I’m pretty sure that was the last time we played a game like this. You and I…ended up in the coat closet.”

“I remember,” he smiled. “Zay’s ear was propped up against the door the whole time.”

Riley laughed. “That’s right! I forgot about that. The door hit him when you opened it and he fell.”

Lucas chuckled as he glanced at the closed door. He knew their friends were nosey and if they were awake that they would be right on the other side of the frosted glass. He couldn’t see any silhouettes or shadows. Maybe Maya got bored and went to bed. Lucas was certain that Zay had finally passed out on the couch. He was pretty much asleep when they left the living room. “At least he learned not to be so nosey.” His eyes lowered back to Riley. “Why are you thinking about that? Just because we got thrown together again?”

“For the most part.” She should have said ‘yes’ and left it at that. She knew that leaving her answer open like that would only invite him to ask her more specifics about why she was thinking about that party. God, the alcohol must have finally taken control of her of sensibility. Either that or seven years of repression were the most she could possibly endure.

He raised a curious eyebrow at her. “For the most part?”

As their eyes locked, she felt the wall between them come tumbling down. “Do you ever…I don’t know…wonder…what might have happened if we had…you know…kissed…in that closet?” ‘Wait,’ her brain suddenly panicked, ‘did I actually say that out loud? Stupid tequila. Stupid, stupid tequila.’

It felt like her eyes burned right through him as they stared at one another. Was he so transparent? How was she capable of seeing right through him? He could hear his heart pulsate in his ears. “I have,” he finally answered. “You?”

“Yeah…but…you know…I think about your track record and,” she shrugged, “I don’t know.”

“My track record?” What did his dating record have to do with something that could have happened in a closet when they were sophomores in high school?

“You know that you date around.”

“So do you.” He still wasn’t sure what their dating lives had to do with it.

“I do,” she agreed. “But I don’t…I don’t get into all of these two month long relationships.” She paused. “Honestly, I feel like this is the first time you’ve been single since that birthday party.”

He looked at her for a long moment. What was running through her mind right now? “What are you trying to say?”

She shrugged. “I don’t even know.” She laughed. “Maybe the alcohol is getting to me.” She should leave well enough alone. They only had a few more minutes left. She should just be quiet until her alarm went off, but that wasn’t what she wanted. She wasn’t sure if she would ever get a chance like this again. She had been drinking. He had been drinking. They were technically supposed to be playing ‘seven minutes in heaven’. Maybe they could—she smirked at the thought. “This could be the last time, though…you know.”

“Last time?” He wasn’t sure where their communication had broken down. They were having a pretty good conversation before Riley brought up Darby’s party. Now, he wasn’t sure what she was saying.

“Who knows? Maybe you’ll meet Miss Right tomorrow. Maybe we won’t be forced into a hot tub for seven minutes in heaven again.” She paused as her heart raced. She knew she had to be drunk. She had never been this bold in her entire life. Was she actually suggesting this? “It’s not a big deal right,” she reasoned. ‘Wrong,’ the tiny part of her brain that remained sobered screamed at her. She shrugged. “Even Maya and I have kissed on a dare before.” Was she trying to downplay it to convince him that it wasn’t a big deal or was she trying to downplay it to convince herself that it wasn’t a big deal? “We’re not thirteen years old anymore, Lucas. A kiss between friends is not life and death.” ‘Or is it?’

His heart skipped a beat as he listened to her. He had to make sure that he had heard her correctly. Was she actually suggesting that they finish what they never started in that coat closet five years ago? “You want to actually play seven minutes in heaven?”

“I never have before. Not really, anyway.” As she waited for his answer, she determined that this didn’t have to be some earth shattering moment. It would just be a drunken moment between two friends who were in Las Vegas to have a good time—or so she convinced herself. “I’m about to turn 21. I’m in Las Vegas. Why not do something I’ve never done before with someone I trust?” When he still said nothing, she began to back peddle. Clearly it was too much—too weird for him. This was what she was afraid of. She knew she would do or say something stupid to him. She only wished that she could have caught herself before she opened up her drunken mouth. “It’s pretty stupid, right?”

He knew that it was a bad idea. He knew that they shouldn’t do it. He knew that he should stay exactly where he was—at the other end of the hot tub. He knew that he shouldn’t close the space in between them. He knew that he shouldn’t brush away the tiny wisp of hair that had fallen across her eyes. He knew that he shouldn’t give into the beginning of a fantasy he had imagined for so long.

But, he had to. He had to know if this moment was real. He had to know if everything he was feeling was one sided. He had to know if she really did see him as a brother. They didn’t get their chance in Darby’s closet five years ago. He wasn’t about to make the first move on her back then, especially with the entire sophomore class on the other side of the door. This felt different. She was asking him to kiss her. She was asking him to play this game with her, and even though she said it wasn’t that big of a deal, deep down, he knew that everything between them was about to change.

Good or bad, he knew that something had to give. He couldn’t remain in purgatory for the rest of his life.

Her eyes slowly lifted to meet his as he closed the space between them. Neither said a word as he tucked those few loose strands of hair behind her ear. He swallowed as his fingertips lightly brushed against her cheek. He wasn’t sure if he was hallucinating or not, but he could have sworn that she leaned into his touch as his fingertips grazed her jaw. He paused as he wordlessly offered her a way out of this. When she didn’t make any move to back away from him, his heart pounded even faster. This was real. He was mere inches from tasting heaven right on earth. He knew he had to act before he could talk himself out of it. As he lowered his head and closed his eyes, he knew that he was about to finally give into the one impulse he had suppressed for seven years.

As Riley’s eyes fluttered closed, she couldn’t help but to feel that it was all happening in slow motion. The anticipation was almost paralyzing as she waited to feel his lips brush against hers. She held her breath as his nose lightly grazed her cheek. This was it. Her heart thundered even harder as his lips finally met hers.

Eight years after their first kiss, they finally had their second, which was quickly followed by their third and fourth. Half drunk and more in love than ever, she wrapped her arms around his neck as their lips refused to leave one another.

Lucas gripped the edge of the hot tub with one hand while his other arm wrapped around her waist. This had to be a dream. He knew that at any second he would wake up alone in his dorm room—haunted by the knowledge that this moment could only ever exist in his own bittersweet fantasy. There was no way that, after all this time, God would smile down on him and bless him with a glimpse into paradise.

He braced himself as he waited to be thrown out this beautiful utopia. He expected to be transported back to New York—back to the loneliness he had felt ever since the horrific moment she told him how she really felt when they were in the 8th grade—but that moment never came. As soon as she opened her mouth against his, he released a quiet moan. He felt completely drunk in that moment, but it wasn’t because of the alcohol. It was because he knew that when you dream about something for so long and you finally get it, everything around you becomes surreal. Dream or not, he wanted to savor every precious millisecond of this moment. As her tongue slowly entered his mouth, he pulled her closer while her fingers slowly danced down the length of his arms. He thought for sure she was about to pull away, to confirm that he was nothing more than a big brother to her, but when her hands finally landed on his hips, she nudged him closer to her.

Encouraged by her gesture, his hesitancy melted away as he deepened their kiss. Fear disappeared into a sense of passion that he had never felt with anyone else before. He guided them backward, toward the edge of the hot tub, as his tongue explored the sweet taste of her mouth.

When the back of her legs hit the seat in the corner of the tub, she sat down at the edge as she wrapped her legs around his torso. Eight years since that first little taste, that first little jolt between their lips, and now, she wasn’t sure she would ever be able to go back to the life she knew before this moment. This was unlike every other kiss she had ever experienced. Even though they were in a hot tub, she could feel goose bumps rise up all over her body. It was as if the logical part of her mind had detached itself from her body as she allowed herself a few precious moments to give into everything she had wanted for so long.

As soon as she wrapped her legs around him, he knew this had to be some drunken delusion. Reality had never been this kind to him. He shuddered when she ran her fingers across his chest. Whatever was building between them was nothing short of electric. They were nothing short of perfection. This moment and everything that surrounded them was beyond perfect. Her lips were the gateway to a world he had long since desired to reside in.

When he wrapped his other arm around her, completely enveloping her in his arms, Riley knew she had left Earth. Her soul now dwelled in a place that didn’t have any understanding of the concept of time or reality. She had dreamt of being in his arms for as long as she had known him, and here she was, perfectly safe from the harsh realities of the world that surrounded them. They were only kissing, but it felt like so much more. It felt like a homecoming. It felt like years of misunderstanding were beginning to melt away. It felt like the beginning of something new.

Riley’s phone lit up as her alarm echoed throughout the otherwise silent room. She could feel herself plummeting back to earth as her phone unforgivingly reminded her that sometimes seven minutes could feel like seven seconds. ‘Seven minutes in heaven. More like six minutes of talking and one minute in heaven,’ she thought bitterly as she reluctantly pulled away from him. She took a deep breath as she reached for the shrieking device.

Lucas never heard her phone go off. He was suspended in a reality where nothing else existed but the woman in his arms. It was only when she nudged him back that he heard the obnoxious sound of her alarm. “It’s been seven minutes,” he questioned as he watched her turn the alarm off. He took a deep breath as he quelled the urge to reach for her once more. He only had a glimpse of this new world, but he knew it was exactly what he had been looking for.

After she turned the alarm off, she looked up at him. His face was slightly flushed and his lips were slightly parted as he tried to catch his breath. She thought for sure that he would pull away as soon as they kissed. She was certain that he would tell her it was way too weird, but he didn’t. As her eyes lowered to her phone once more, she knew that it could have easily gone further had her alarm not gone off. “Since we got in here,” she finally responded as a blush crept up on her cheeks. ‘How far would it have gone?’

Lucas still felt slightly disoriented as he processed her words. That was not seven minutes. It barely felt longer than a few seconds. Suddenly, their entire conversation came back to him. “But technically, most of that was spent talking.”

Riley’s heart fluttered as she looked up at him. “What are you saying?”

He looked at her for a long minute as he carefully considered his next words. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to put himself out there. He wasn’t sure if she would laugh in his face or call him ridiculous, but he also knew that if he let her get out of the hot tub without at least asking, he would regret it. They were on the verge of something, he could feel it. She had to have felt it too. It was too intense to only be one sided. “You wanted to play seven minutes in heaven,” he began as he forced himself to remain where he stood, “not one minute in heaven.” All he wanted to do was to reach for her, to feel her pressed against him once more.

She bit her bottom lip as she looked back down at her phone. As she set a new alarm, she realized that she was definitely feeling the effects of the alcohol that coursed through her system. She knew it because every cell in her body felt a jolt at his suggestion and she immediately knew she was not strong enough to deny herself another glimpse into a world she had quite often fantasized about.

She sat the device down and reached for her drink. She said nothing as she downed the rest of the contents. She knew that this was a mistake—one that she would pay for a very long time, but she also knew that those extra minutes would be worth every second of torture she was sure to endure once it was over.

After she sat the empty glass down, she closed the space between them as her fingertips skated across the water. Once she reached him, she wrapped her arms around his neck. “Ok, Friar,” she smirked. “Let’s play then.”

He didn’t hesitate. If he did, for one moment, he would have stopped whatever it was they were doing. He knew that he had to tell her how he felt. He knew that they had to work out whatever feelings that may or may not exist between them, but after years of broken dreams and constant longing, his brain no longer ruled his body. Maybe it was the alcohol, but maybe, just maybe, somewhere deep within him knew that whatever they were doing was real and, in a way, it was the most honest conversation they had ever had.

Their eight minutes in heaven rapidly turned into fifteen minutes in heaven as Lucas fumbled around to hit the snooze button on her phone after the second set of seven. She made no move to pull away from him as he opened his eyes long enough to silence the device. Neither said a word when he casually tossed her phone toward the corner of the room because their lips were already speaking volumes.

When her phone shrieked seven minutes later, Riley frowned against his lips. Had seven minutes passed so quickly? She was completely oblivious to the fact that a total of fourteen minutes had passed since she first set that alarm. Her frown melted into a smile when he pulled her closer to him.

She knew she would pay for this for an eternity. She knew that these precious minutes would haunt her until she was able to force him from her system, but she knew it would be worth it all. Every caress, every kiss, every touch was the perfect movement at the perfect time. She had never felt more alive than in those fifteen minutes. She didn’t want it to end. She didn’t want to be forced back into reality. She didn’t want to sober up. She didn’t want to feel awkward around him when it ended. She wanted to stay exactly as they were.

As her phone continued its relentless chime, she knew that whatever this was—whatever lapse in judgment they had fallen into—was over. Even Cinderella had to face the real world after dancing with her prince all night.

Riley slowly pulled away from him when he began to kiss along her jawline. She wasn’t sure if it was the heat in the tub, the heat between them, or the sudden sense of self-awareness that shot through her as her alarm continued its relentless call back to reality, but she had to create some space between them. What was happening? Was any of this real or was it all one drunken mistake?

Once she was able to catch her breath, she turned away from him. “I’m sure the others are probably wondering what we’re doing,” she told him as she forced herself out of the hot tub. She reached for a towel on the bench by the tub as she quickly dried off. She had to go to bed. She had to get out of that room. Simply leaving the hot tub wasn’t enough. The temptation to return to him was too strong. She turned her back toward him as she ran the towel down the length of her body. She paused long enough to notice that her hands were shaking. ‘Really, Riley?’ She tossed the damp towel to the side before she walked to the other side of the room to silence her obnoxious phone.

Lucas was slightly dumbfounded as he watched her fumble around with her phone in order to turn off her alarm. “Did I do something wrong,” he asked as he climbed out of the tub and closed the space between them.

Riley spun around to answer him, but didn’t expect him to be so close to her. Her brown eyes were immediately met with his green ones as he stood mere inches from her. It would be too easy to reach for him, to dive back into the paradise she had discovered between his lips. Her breath caught in her throat as his lips slowly turned up into a small smile. “N-No,” she stammered.

It took every bit of self-control he had not to pull her back in his arms. She looked frightened, but he wasn’t sure why. Was she worried about everyone else? “I don’t think the others care what we’re doing,” he offered. “It is our first night here, and it’s almost 3am…so, 6am in New York.” His eyes slowly drifted toward the door. “I’m sure Zay is passed out on the couch where we left him, and Maya probably got bored and went to bed. If I’m wrong and they’re both on the other side of that door, then,” he sighed as he looked back at the brunette, “I mean we’ve all had a lot to drink tonight, right? Maybe they’ll be too drunk to remember that our seven minutes in heaven lasted a lot longer.”

‘Too drunk to remember.’ His words echoed through her slightly bewildered mind. He was absolutely right. They had all been drinking. Riley knew that she would have never suggested the game in the first place if she had been sober. Still, she had no clue how drunk he was. He didn’t seem to be smashed, but he definitely had more to drink than the rest of them did. Her eyes ticked over to the hot tub. She released a bittersweet chuckle as her eyes finally lowered to the ground. She knew exactly what this was, and she couldn’t be mad about it because it was her idea! Lucas Friar, serial monogamist stood before her. He was single (for the moment). He was in Las Vegas. They decided to stay in their first night. This was only ever meant to be a one-time thing. She knew she had to play it off. She knew that she had to walk away and pretend that the last twenty-one minutes hadn’t completely spun her world off its axis. She turned away from him as she reached for her tank top and shorts. “Yeah…what’s the big deal, right? We’re both drunk. The setting was perfect and now…I can scratch something off the bucket list.”

The only thing colder than her words was the icy tone that matched it. Lucas frowned as he took a step closer to her. He didn’t mean that he was too drunk. He was only trying to assure her that the others wouldn’t care what they were doing. “Riley, that’s not what I—“

Her head snapped up to look at him. She couldn’t listen to another word. She was already mortified enough. “Thanks, Lucas. You’re a good friend.” The right corner of her lips lifted into a small smile—one that instantly made her nauseous—before she opened the door and quickly retreated to her room. She didn’t dare peer into the living room to see if anyone else was still awake. She only wanted to get away from him and this awkward conversation.

Lucas pinched the bridge of his nose as he quelled the urge to let out a frustrated groan. What the hell just happened? Yes, they had been drinking, but it wasn’t like they were completely wasted, right? He knew he was buzzed, but he was well aware of the decisions he had made in that hot tub. Riley seemed fairly in control of herself as well. If he thought for one second that she was completely smashed, he never would have agreed to her request.

He reached for a towel and wrapped it around his waist as he grabbed his shirt. He wandered into the living room and noticed that Zay was sleeping in the same spot where they left him twenty-one minutes earlier. Maya was nowhere in sight. ‘Good,’ he thought to himself as he made his way to his room. ‘There will be fewer questions to have to answer in the morning.’

Riley leaned her head against the door as soon as she closed it behind her. Even in the darkened room, she could tell that Maya was asleep in the bed on the far side of the room. Riley closed her eyes as she quietly bumped her head against the door three times. She couldn’t go back out there. She was completely humiliated by everything that happened in that stupid hot tub. Who asks someone to play ‘seven minutes in heaven’ with them just to fulfill some stupid ‘bucket list’ request? She knew that she felt something when they kissed, and for a while, she thought that maybe he did too, but then again, maybe he didn’t. Maybe he was right. They all had been drinking for several hours. Maybe it was all an illusion—a convenient hookup because they were both lonely.

As she reached for her pajamas, she prayed that the alcohol she consumed would allow her to forget the twenty-one minutes she spent with Lucas Friar in the hot tub. When she crawled into bed, she closed her eyes. When she still felt the burning sensation of his kiss on her lips, she knew that it would be easier said than done.

#ouat2011 fic #**21**#rucas fic #liley fic #riley x lucas #lucas x riley #rucas fan fic #rucas fanfic #rucas fan fiction #rucas fanfiction #liley fanfic #liley fan fiction #liley fanfiction #liley fan fic #okkkkkkk so it's not as good as I thought it was #I oversold it and now I'm embarrased

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itsgaga · 3 years ago

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Nikki Sixx Becoming a Father...

A/N: I really wanna write more for motley crue but i genuinely don’t know what to write about...help...anyways this was requested more than once..so sorry about the wait..my bad.

daddy nikki okkkkkkk

I remember in a interview Nikki said he always wanted to be a dad

So were you nervous to tell him?

Not really

Telling him can go either two ways

One

He’s super excited and with a big smile on his face he goes

“Oh yeah babe that’s awesome!”

With like maybe a fist pump, idk..

Or two

He’s super excited, picks you up, maybe spins you around, kisses you, grabs your stomach

Either way he is excited

While you’re pregnant he does everything he can to be with you at all doctor appointments and he always makes sure you’re taken care of

If he goes away for work or something he’ll hire someone to check up on you and to get you whatever you need

However if he is there he’ll try his best to do what you want

He cooks for you

Rubs your back

Sings to you and the baby

Tries all the weird cravings you have because he’s curious

All that good stuff

Nikki decided that he was gonna put together the nursery

He had you choose what you wanted and you told him where to put it

But he wanted to be the one that built everything

His typical day was waking up early to make you food and go into the nursery to build until you needed something

He would constantly be doing something so at some point you had to tell him to chill out and relax for a bit

Which he appreciated

He would be really excited to tell you names that he thought of

And valued your opinion

So if you don’t like a name and you give him a reason why, he would think of other names that aren’t like that one

He would play music for you and the baby

Will always tell you you’re beautiful especially when you feel your ugliest

And his hands would constantly be on your stomach as he talks to the baby

Now labor

He. Will. Not. Leave. Your. Side.

No matter what.

You tried to ask him to go get food

He had someone else go

He knew you could pop this kid out at any second and there was no way in hell he was missing that

When the time did come he didn’t know if he wanted to be by your side holding your hand or at the end and watch the baby come out

He ended up holding your hand and sorta pulling you forward so he can do both

Kept telling you how good you were doing

Reminding you to breathe

He had a smile on his face the whole time

When you were done he showered you in compliments

And when it was time for him to hold the baby he couldn’t hide his feelings even if he wanted to

His smile was the biggest you’ve ever seen it and his eyes showed pure happiness

#nikki sixx x reader #nikki sixx fanfiction #nikki sixx fanfic #nikki sixx imagine #motley crue #motley crue x reader #motley crue imagine #tommy lee #vince neil #mick mars #80s

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tellywoodtrash · 4 years ago

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immj2 01.12.20 lb

ishani like this grubby-pawed bitch took control of the whole place the second you were gone, but dadi’s like okkkkkkk hold your horses, that’s not the whole truth. she did what she was supposed to. what you would have done if you were here.

V looking left-right like he’s watching a tennis match, listening to the devil and angel on his shoulders lol.

hein???? maut ke 40th day? i thought he said 16 days in the last ep???? 16 days for the ghaav to fill and what not in that convo kabir and him had....... HOW LONG HAVE Y’ALL BEEN STANDING HERE HAVING THIS SCENE???????????????

anyway, bhai is really calling her out for getting all ready to become suhaagan again not 40 days after he went missing. body tak nahi mili thi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dadi again coming to her defense again. thank god. warna madam toh mooh nahi kholti, aur khadi khadi beizzati sehti rehti, from a dude who as far as she knows isn’t even her real husband.

shoulder devil is back to add some more mirch masala to story.

lol kabir’s bhaiyya waale feelings for ishani are long-dead and gone. he’s like “isse chhodke bohut badi galti kardi. current mein jhulas ke marr gayi hoti toh aaj itna mooh nahi phaadti” hahahahahahaha. little sisters, huh, kabir???? a real pain, amirite?????

lmaooooooooooooooooooooooooo ishani’s like GHOOOOOOOOOOOORTA KYA HAI BEYYYY???? ASLKAJDSALKDJLAKJS WHEN I SAY I LOVE THIS GIRL THE FUCKING MOST IN THIS SHOWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!

riddhima is very happy to hear ishani proclaim from danke ki chottttt pe ki meraaaaa vansh bhaiiiiiii, iss ghar ka asli haqqdaaar waapas aa gaya hai!!!!!

lmaoooooooooooooooooooooo chachi is like oh god ishani agli class humari lagayegiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. LORDDDDDD I WISH.

but nope, she’s on her fave topic “we hate riddhima” so she’s gonna be on this soapbox for a while now.

ishani said riddhima has a “sharp brain” and lmao ok. yeah sure, her brain as sharp as a fucking bowling ball. i’ve seen pillows and goldfish bowls that are sharper than riddhima’s fucking brain. she’s a member of the rare and exclusive smooth brain club. no thoughts, this bitch empty, yeeeeeeeeeeeet.

ishani continues to bitch bitch bitch and V ka paara bad raha haiiiiii. death glare getting more and more intense.

oh dang!!!!!!!!!!!

LMAO RIDDHIMA’S DUMB ASS IS LIKE “WOW, GOOD JOB VIHAAN, TUM WAISE HI REACT KAR RAHE HO JAISE VANSH KARTA!” MAN I CAN’T WITH HOW GODDAMN STOOOOPID SHE IS ANYMORE.

LOL WHUTTTT???? ARE THEY GONNA FIGHT WITH THESE FLAMING HAVAN KUND LAKDIIIIIS???? HAHAHAHA.

the bloodlust in riddhima’s eyes is a biggggggg mood, lol. i too would like to see these two fight again. preferably shirtless.

damnit kabir decided to be the bigger man and throw the stick back into the havan kund.

blah blah he’s like sautela hi sahi, you’re still my brother. i don’t want you to misunderstand me. i left no stone unturned looking for your body. and i was gonna leave the city. but riddhima thought i should take on the responsibilities of this house.

riddhima and V’s reactions to this bs, lmao.

anyway, he’s like now you’re back, it’s best i leave. i’m going to take something that’s precious to me, it’s my right.

lol pls. he’d murder this Mummy in a fucking heartbeat for a hissa of this riyaasat.

LMAO ISSKI KHUSHI TOH DEKHOOOOO. I LOVE IT.

Mummy like kabir tfffff you doing, this is not our plan!!!!!! aunty, learn to cut your losses. honestly. this is why y’all don’t win.

“ruko!!!!!!!!!!!”

manhooson ka reaction.

LMAO ISHANI’S REACTION. SHE’S HONESTLY THE MOST RELATABLE PERSON HERE.

“tumhe nahi lagta ki tum mujhse bohut hi keemti cheez cheen ke lee jaa rahe ho???”

Mummy like yesssssss, my time to shine, time for Mamta Overload Acting.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA.

lol riddhima and ishani’s reactions, while dadi is closing her eyes in horror at his bad manners.

RIDDHIMA’S DUMBASS IS STILL LIKE, I DIDN’T TELL VIHAAN THIS IS VANSH’S SAAFA, THEN HOW DID HE KNOW????????????

“thank you. jo mera hai, woh mera hi rahega.”

bwahahahahahahahahahahaha ghazabbbbbb beizzati.

riddhima has never been this turned on in her lifeeeeee.

OH HO. NOW I GET THAT ANON WHO WAS CUSSING OUT DADIIIII. OUFFFFFFFF YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR DADIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

V ka baahari face is:

but his internal face is:

same as wifey and sis, lol.

ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh dadi’s laying on the emotional blackmail thickkkkkkk ki are you really my vansh, my vansh always kept his relationships close no matter how much tension blah blah. fuck. fuck fuck fuck fuckkkkkkkkkkkkk.

“dushmani bohut nibhaa li. ab rishtey nibhaatey hain.”

MMMMHMMMMM YEAH I’D LIKE TO SEE Y’ALL BE RISHTA’D WITH EACH OTHER. SEAL THIS DEAL WITH A KISS, BOYSSSSSS!!!!!

ok fine a hug will do too.

LMAO THE MURDER LOOKS ON BOTH SIDES I LOVE THESE PETTY ASSHOLES SO MUCH.

aslkjdlaskjdlaskjdlaskjdlaksjdlkjasldkjlaskdjlaskjdlsakdlaskldjlas time for kabir to get an angre of his own (mishra?????) coz V is fully threatening to destroyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy him where he stands.

bwahahahahahaha that sweet as pie smile. butter wouldn’t melt in this mouth.

riddhima like ugh, ok anyway, time to carry out predetermined maafi kaaryakram.

lmao she’s telling vihaan ki mere vansh ka dil bohutttttt bada tha, aur woh hota toh mujhe maaf kar deta, and his face hahahahahahahaha:

‘yeah, not anymore, b. that was before you betrayed me and made me jump off a cliff, all for that chomu ex of yours.’

hahahahahahahahahahahaha he’s gone off-script. going super duper hard on the dhokaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

omggggggggggggg he’s going into details ki dadi just told you to marry him secure your future, she wouldn’t have expected you to say yes AND THIS IDIOT GIRL IS LIKE HAS VIHAAN BEING WATCHING THE HOUSE FROM BEFORE????????? THE THOUGHT THAT HE’S VANSH STILLLLLLLLLLLLLLL HASN’T CROSSED HER PEA SIZED BRAIN. HONESTLY I CANNOT WITH HER ANYMORE.

lol she’s hissing “yeh kyaaaaa naatak laga rakha hai????” par bhai toh apne alag hi trip par hain. character mein ghussnaa isse hi kehte hain, riddhima. good thing daniel day-lewis has already retired, coz this one reallllllly coming for his spot with the intenseeeee method acting.

dadi is like beta plssssssssssssss, but ishani and chachi are piling on riddhima. love them messy bitches.

ALSO OH MY GOD HE’S GIVING HER THIS VERYYYYYYYYYYYYY VANSH-Y LOOK AND SHE STILL HASN’T GOTTEN IT WHY IS SHE LIKE THIS?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?

“i want a divorce.”

even kabir is scandalized at the turn of events!!!!!!!!!!!

but lmao, ishani’s reaction is best, as usual.

HE WENT UPSTAIRS AND PACKED A SUITCASE FOR HER AND THREW IT AND RIDDHIMA STILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL IS WONDERING HOW DOES HE KNOW SO MANY DETAILS THAT I DIDN’T TELL HIM?!?!!?!?!?!?! re deva uthaaaaa le mujheeeeeeeeeeee.

“jab tak divorce nahi ho jaata, tum outhouse mein rahogi.”

inke liye toh diwali waapas aa gayi saal mein doosri baar.

dadi is trying to intervene and lmao ishani is emotionally blackmailing her saying don’t increase bhai ka darddddddd by opposing him this time.

“kabhi nahi socha tha ki tum aisa kuch karoge. apni maa ki kasam khaayi thi tumne.”

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA V YOU ABSOLUTE BASTARD I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUU

lmao waise bhi maa toh already marr chuki hai, jhoooti kasam khaane se kaunsa dobara marr jaati?

trollololololololololol ghar se get outhouse kar diyaaaa (only my fellow mallus gonna get this joke.)

nanad is here to help. “itna haq toh mera bhi banta haina!”

PEHLI BAAR ISS MANHOOS KE HARKATON PE HASSI AUR PYAAR AAYA HAI. GOOOOOOD JOB, V2.0!!!!! KEEEEEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!!!!!!!

#ishq mein marjawan 2 #immj2 #immj2 lbs #episode liveblogs

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helloamhere · 3 years ago

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hi!! number 11 and 20 for your tea and books asks?

Hiii :) :) 11. What character archetype or trope is your favourite? ohhh I think it has to be "person who is very scared, decides to try very hard, because love". That to me is in general the positive character arc of every human on this planet (sobs). I will also say I love a good villain arc too though. I like negative character arcs so much when you can watch someone talk themselves into something and feel the creepy-crawly empathy under your skin. So "villain because of injustice/but hero because of same injustice" is maybe one of my all time favorite tropes.

I also adore badass power lady character archetypes. Warrior maiden types, cannot be conquered female fighter types, Charlize-Theron-types, you know!! I do not give a single fuck if they are self-insert fantasies, Women Deserve That

20. If you were to cultivate a fruit orchard, what would you grow?

okkkkkkk delighted to be asked. I grew up with a big apple and pear orchard and I have stone fruit right now and those altogether are probably my favorite kind of fruit in general along with the idyllic setting of the new england style orchard. But I have to say having thought about this question a bit I think I would pick a tropical fruit orchard like maybe guava 😂😂😂 because lately I just really want to move to a tropical island and forget the rest of the world

tea and books ask

#personal #the life and times of helloamhere #ask meme!

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homestuckexamination · 4 years ago

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So I guess, dirk time

Dirk time.

Lol, i appeared mid air like an idiot XD

I’m talking to the auto responder, aren’t I ?

I fucking knew it XD

Yes. It’s me, the friendable alien

Oh bruh. I have no idea Of what is happening. It’s so fucking awkward.

His glasses are not perfectly aligned with his nose. That give the impression that his face his distorted, and I find it absolutely disturbing

How come that he is so much more ripped than Jake ? I mean, not that I am complaining, but dirk isn’t the one living in a littéral jungle

Once again, cal is in the background. I’m pretty sure it won’t move this time

Here I am, being dramatic, almost cutting myself on Cal’s sword, the usual.

I can wield the shitty sword

No. You are not going to play this game. I made sure of that :)

I knew it would be difficult. But dirk is almost as inept as Jake in his approach to other people. Truly, these two are made for each other -_-

Everything is going so well ^^ I am befriending dirk, and I like him, and he is slowly opening up to me. It’s so cute ^^

So.... how much time before everything goes wrong ? -_-

Dirk has never had ANYONE else to befriend, and is kind of a pre-planner, so, yeah X3

And.... two seconds.

AND WHAT IF I WANT TO SEE THIS, ULT DIRK ??

Don’t be an asshole. You’re just salty because young you is a better person than old you.

You are a lot more pathetic now. What kind of adult still dress up as anime characters ? At least young dirk is a teen. What’s your excuse for being an unstable, arrogant, and stupid ?

I don’t hate ult dirk as much as I hate Vriska. But that’s really the only positive thing I can say about him :(

I am going to kick his ass 🙂

Dirklog? Seriously? At lest his theme is cool

What about no ? What about you fuck off, rejoice over the fact that this is already a different timeline, and leave me fucking alone ?

Well, I sure remebered

Of course I still care about Dirk. I could make a meme about that, but I don’t want to pause the game now.

I want to know how it end 0^0

OH. I got it. I’m going to let dirk choose, aren’t I ? This is such an obvious answer, and such a good one too ! I really hope I’m right *^*

Do I have a plan for how to protect myself without the tenets of canon ?

I sure hope I am, because if I get another bad end like in friendsim, I’m going to scream.

Oh god Mspar I love you. You can be so cool when your friends are In danger and you have to fuck canon to protect them *^*

How dare he call young dirk his splinter. Your the splinter here, asshole.

Am I going to pis je up candy Dave ??

I AMMMM ! Candy Dave !

Candy Dave is the man

FUCK OFF YOU ANIME LOOKING SHIT

Uuuuuuurg. Everytimes ult dirk is on screen I simultaneously want to punch my laptop and want to dance to his AWSOME theme

ahahaha i knew it !!! Chose, my orange child ! Chose and be freeeeeeee *u*

Im having a blast in this route

Bad end first, good end last :)

Go on, dirk. Trust yourself

Actually standing up to Ult Dirk and giving him the middle finger IS quite cathartic.

I don’t understand. Why am I back at the beginning?

Oh. Ahah. I thought my game had crashed

I wonder If I have messed up at some point ? I am now trying to die with Aradia at the green sun

What is happeninnnnnnnng ?

I became a first guardian ?

What am I doing ? What is happening?

I fucking locked the timeline ?

But what about my friendsim friends ?

...? I think you may have. Like. Glitched something? That is the TRUE END that you get at the end of the Afterw@rd. I have no idea how you got it from Dirk’s split choice, I’ll check it out in a little bit.

Okkkkkkk

Let me just... see if the same things happens when Dirk don’t goes with his ultimate self

Oh. Ult dirk just cut my good end. I should have seen it coming

An epilogue ? Great. I love epilogues -_-

Back to doc scratch place, but doc scratch isn’t there

WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU

T posing god person, my old ennemie

That’s Aysha. ;3

A sequel ? Now your talking, mysterious director

No no please. Keep flirting with me. That’s almost as funny as Eridan´s route

Maybe not everything have to be a storie all the time

Okay, so now that I have the epilogues, I understand the whole shenanigans with the sun and everything

The epilogue makes the ending so much better *^*

I loved it !

And... I have now finished pesterquest. What a ride !

And just in time for probably Act 2 to drop today!!! I still. Have no idea how you even got the True End from Dirk’s Choice. I gotta boot up Pesterquest now and check if there’s a glitch.

#Pesterquest #HSE #Fanon #Jidem #Liveblog

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jessiewre · 5 years ago

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Day 42

Sat 15th Feb

Safari in Lake Nakuru 🦒🦓🦏🦩🌞

The pillows in our room were officially the worst pillows in Africa so far and in the night we’d had to put our travel pillow inside one case, and one of our PUFFY COATS in the other. I planned to file a complaint with Philly Tours first thing the next morning.

On the contrary, the hotel had prepared our takeaway breakfast with so much care and attention. There were proper takeaway cups and packaged up food, including our leftovers from the night before so Phil tipped the two chefs and waiter a dollar each. They were buzzing.

Thankfully, our Safari vehicle arrived (so we hadn’t been completely ripped off by Peter) and it was a good vehicle, not a crappy minibus like we’d seen some people safari’ing in. The two French girls in there were nice but they hadn’t bought their passports with them, so paying at the entrance was a bit awkward - until I reminded them a picture might be fine and they found one on their phones. PHEW.

At first, the safari was a little underwhelming as we could see the edges of the park around us with all the buildings of the town. But then we went around the lake and deeper into the park - and then it was really cool. It was more chilled out than the Masai Mara, not as impressive of course, but still nice. There were quite a few areas that had issues from previous flooding though. A couple of roads had been built up with rocks and we passed a lot of dead trees atmospherically positioned in flooded land with loads of ugly maribou stork birds and baboons around. There was a weird atmosphere in those areas and it sort of felt like they were about to attack the vehicle. Then our driver was like ‘Make sure all the food is hidden as the baboons might attack the vehicle’. Oh god, planet of the apes could be REAL.

We got through all the baboons scratching and picking at each others arses without being attacked, then spotted giraffes and warthogs (there’s always warthogs), but then our driver managed to get us to an AMAZING spot where we saw two adult white rhinos and a baby right next to us! The adults had a bit of a stand off and we watched on in amazement.

We visited a nice waterfall where the water was a little brown from the mud, then we headed to a lodge for our lunch stop. We had bought our lunch with us as Peter had told us it would be 25$ per person to eat in the park, but outside the entrance was a massive sign in capital letters saying NO PICNICS ALLOWED. Great.

After the manager flat our refused for us to eat are food there, we made friends with the waiter and he said we could eat it if we were subtle and ordered other things - so I had a vegetable soup and Phil had a bang average veggie sandwich and chips. We sat with the French girls and one of them randomly said that the best ketchup she’s ever had was when we was in Ireland when she had a delicious homemade ketchup somewhere. LOL did not expect that to be what she remembered about Ireland, Stella & Helen will be disgusted. She also said that the grass on safari was green but the grass in Ireland is the greenest in the world she thinks. Ketchup and grass = Irelands legacy.

While we sat in the restaurant we went to book our train as we’d decided which day to get it. And guess what? It was fully booked again. We’d left it too late, assuming the weekdays wouldn’t be so busy. IDIOTS.

On the afternoon drive, we were lucky enough to spot a black rhino, much rarer to see than the white. It was peacefully grazing amongst zebras, impalas and warthogs - it looked amazing, had a proper tortois-y dinosaur face!

Over the whole safari, we saw:

Buffalo

Giraffe (endangered Rothschild type)

Monkeys

Baboons

Flamingoes

Maribou Storks

Pelicans

Pumbas

White Rhino

Black Rhino

When we got back to the hotel, Phil noticed that his shorts had disappeared from the bush they were drying on outside the room. It was obvious someone had been trimming that very bush as it was all neat and there were clippings on the ground, so Phil asked reception. They assured him they’d ask the gardener and find them. I was convinced they’d been nicked...

We half decided to eat at the hotel again out of pure laziness and fatigue, but as soon as we walked in I was like Why are we here. It ain’t for a plate of vegetables thats for sure. So we went to reception to get a taxi to town as we knew there was a Java cafe there and it was a safe bet, and plus if we went to town, we could book our coach tickets for Nairobi to the coast (damn you fully booked train!).

Our taxi driver annoyingly dropped us at a little shop with a Modern Coast kiosk that was CLOSED instead of the actual Modern Coast office HOW BLOODY USELESS. So we ended up walked through the busy town while really hungry looking for a tuc tuc to get to the right place. Then we saw Java cafe on a corner so thought screw it, We’re really hungry so lets just eat first.

But then...we walked over and the door was LOCKED. I could see people inside eating their food, but it had closed at 7pm and it was now 7:15pm. Oh ffs.

We stood outside it feeling a little sad, then the manager walked over to the door, popped his head out the door and smiled at us ‘There’s another Java cafe if you want to eat, just over in the Mall!’. OMG what a legend, we KNEW Java wouldn’t let us down like this. Thanks random man 👍🏽.

We jumped in a tuc tuc to go to Modern Coast and Phil jumped out to get the tickets while I paid. The driver and his mate (not sure why he had a mate with him but whatever) then tried to overcharge me. I paid them 200ksh as that was more than enough and then one of them was like ‘Miss, Buy me a tea’. He had this really annoying look on his face like he was telling me I had to do it. Excuse me buddy, that is not how you ask someone if they’d like to buy you a gift.

We needed a tuc tuc to get to the mall but I didn’t want to go with them out of principal so we walked there like fools. It was only 10 minutes but it was down a crappy dusty busy road and we were hungry. But at least we had our morals right?!

We passed a shop with hats and remembered my quest for a baseball cap (look, I know its a bad idea, but I need one for safaris okkkkkkk). I tried a few on and honest to god it might be the worst I’ve ever looked ever. HORRENDOUS. So no, I didn’t buy one. The search continues.

Dinner at Java was half good and half annoying. Our starter of tomato soups were bought over and the girl said ‘Two chicken soups’. Uh, no love, we ordered tomato soup - so she walked away to check with our waitress who was dealing with another table. This waitress then bought the soups back over and fully tried to blag it ‘Two chicken soups’ she said as she tried to palm them off onto us. I’m not gonna lie, part of me wanted to just take the chicken and peanut soup as I’ll bet it was tasty as fook. - but no, we told her the mistake and waited patiently for our TOMATO soups.

After the soup, I honestly felt full (mental I know) so my Mexican burrito was ready for takeaway after two bites. Phil managed to devour his vege burger no problem.

On return to the hotel, still no sign of the shorts (cos they’d been nicked obvs) but I forced the reception guy to find me new pillows and he basically broke into someone’s room while they weren’t there and took the pillows off their bed. BOVERED cos they were SO much better, as in, they were actual pillows and not a bag of socks. So I went to bed happy. Well, I did until I checked my phone and saw the news that Caroline Flack had passed away. It wasn’t officially suicide at that point, but from the reports it seemed the most likely scenario. It felt incredibly weird to be sat in Kenya and to think she’d died that very day, while we’d been on a safari, and we went to bed feeling very strange and very sad.

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unknowncrashingthroughthewindow · 6 years ago

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you know what not to start drama and say whatever you want about zen but something i do find increasingly infuriating is how... insensitive he is at times during seven’s route. (i meaaannnn i’d say the “triptor bot” chat right after the “seven’s depressed?” chatroom is a pretty good fucking example. it’s just like five minutes of him going “okkkkkk wellll that sucks for you but let’s talk about me for a bit okkkkkkk” which Kind Of really pisses me off. he doesn’t even really address the whole “seven’s working a job that threatens his life” thing he’s just like “lol i didnt know he could be a good person look at all these beautiful pictures of meeeee” so it really makes me Hmm)

also i know that it’s hard to comfort a friend and maybe the culture in korea is a bit different but whenever seven is like genuinely distressed zen’s just like “hey cheer up dumbass” and i know he means well but. cheering up when you’re horribly depressed isnt really that easy. and it would be better if zen acknowledged that. imo

(alsooooo i know it’s a gimmick where zen’s like “hey watch out!!! all men will eventually be consumed by their lust because they’re all monsters without a single brain cell!!!!” but it’s still Really Really insensitive especially considering the gravity of the situation. i mean like. seven’s kinda. watching his entire life fall apart. and all zen can say is “hey trust him but not too much yknow? lol” i realise that he’s not physically in the apartment to witness everything seven’s going through, but i think if maybe he just thought once before he spoke he would’ve realised it was really inappropriate to say. so. just wanted to get that off my chest too.)

#not a quote #maybe im just a bit raw from the whole emotional weight of day 7 but. im just Kinda Pissed i guess #long post #i dont dislike zen as a character! but this shit makes me wanna roundkick him in the face!

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hyunjins-wife · 6 years ago

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|Pancake| A Bang Chan Scenario

Okkkkkkk this was requested by my beby @channiechanchan sooo here it is. I hope you like it Sonette. #SONAH5EVER

AND SHE REQUESTED THE MOODBOARD soooooooo I put them together...

Word Count: 1,986

Requested: yes

There are certain perks to being bestfriends with a CEO

You and Chan had been best friends since you were in diapers

Your mothers had gone through high school together and were each others maid of honor

Chan’s mom had him first

About a year before you

So he was almost a year older than you

But you two didn’t care

You were kids

You had gone to the same elementary school

But when it was time to go to middle and high school you ended up in different schools

Chan was home schooled

His dad opting to teach him the ins and outs of the family business that would become the multi million dollar company that it is today

You went to normal school and you were finishing up your junior year of college

You were majoring in accounting and had been looking for an internship for the summer

You had called Chan’s mom asking if she could talk to her husband about a position

But the news she gave you left you in shock

Chan had taken over the company a couple months ago

Meaning you were going to have to talk to him

Now there was a slight problem

You hadn’t talk to Chan in almost 6 months

Not that you didn’t want to talk to him

He just stopped answering your text and snapchats

So you jut let him be thinking he had been busy

Which apparently he was

Extremely busy

You thanked his mom and hung up the phone

You sat in your apartment for a moment wondering if you should actually call Chan

You decided to call his office number instead of his personal

You waited for someone to pick up and soon enough a woman picked up the other line

“Bang Enterprise, how may I help you?”

“Uh yes I need to speak to Chan”

“Yeah of course you do. I’m sorry but who is this?”

“Will you just tell him it’s pancake?”

“ok...…. hold on one second”

You get put on hold and sit for a moment kicking yourself at how crazy you sounded

Pancake was a nickname Chan had called you all through elementary and high school

You had called him waffle

Why?

Well when you were 7 and he was 8 he had asked you which you like better

You liked pancakes

He liked waffles

And so he started to call you pancake

You hear the phone picked back up and expected the woman to tell you to stop calling or something

But you were surprised to hear a familiar voice call out your nickname

“Pancake... It’s been a while”

You froze for a moment before you stuttered out a response

“Yeah, yeah it uhh has hasn’t it”

“I must say I was shocked when my secretary told me a pancake was calling me”

“Yeah sorry it was the first name that came to mind that I thought you would recognize”

“It’s fine, so, what did you call for”

“Oh yeah, well I was originally going to talk to your dad about this but I called your mom first and she told me you took over the company so I called you. I’m about to finish up junior year and I’ve been looking for an internship”

“Ohhh yes, accounting, hold on and let me see”

You sat for a moment and listened to him click away at his computer

“How would a job sound, Instead of an internship that you don’t even get paid for? I have an opening”

“No no that’s ok really I don’t want to intrude”

“Pancake we literally took baths together when we were kids, trust me you aren’t intruding. So how about you start Monday, meet me in my office at 8 and I’ll show you around and help you get settled”

“Ok yeah I’ll see you then. Thank you Chan”

“It’s no problem I’m glad to be able to have such a brilliant person join the company. I’ve missed you pancake we’ll have to get lunch and catch up. Oh I’ve got a meeting I’ll see you Monday, bye Love”

You sat with the phone to your ear for a minute or two as you tried to calm down the raging blush on your face

This was going to be interesting

You thought your cliché feeling for your childhood best friend had been forgotten

But man were you wrong

As soon as he had called you that old nickname your heart sped up and you knew you were still in deep

So Monday rolls around and you get ready and head to the company

You get off the elevator on the right floor and walk towards the secretary’s desk

You stand in front of the lady

She must have only been a year or two older you

She looked up at you

“Uhh I am supposed to meet Cha-”

“It’s Mr. Bang around here hun”

You stood shocked for a moment at the rude tone of voice she used to interrupt you

You were about to say something when the door at the end of the hall opened

You turned to see Chan basically sprinting at you

He collided with you while screaming

“Pancakeeeeeeee!!!!!!!”

You laughed as you reciprocated the hug Chan had wrapped you in

“Hey waffle, long time no see”

He broke away and smiled at you before grabbing your hand and pulling you in the direction that he had come

You walked into what you assumed was his office

And man what a room

It was simple but modern

His desk sat across from the door with a stone wall behind it

The walls were glass windows and the view was amazing

You turned to Chan to catch him already looking at you

“This is amazing”

“I’m glad you like it”

I really do”

“Good, because you’ll be in here a lot”

You look at Chan for a moment before he continues talking

“I said I have an opening. The opening is for my personal accountant. You will take care of everything important. From charity events to traveling and other things. But you’ll also deal with my personal account. I’m not smart enough to deal with it at this point”

You stood for a moment processing everything

This was your dream job

“I don’t know what to say other than thank you Chan. This is a dream come true”

“It’s no problem. Oh and your desk is over there. Since you’ll be dealing with the important stuff you’ll stay in here so nothing gets out that doesn't need to be out”

You nodded before heading toward your desk and setting your bag down

You turned back to Chan to see him already looking at you

“C’mon pancake it’s time for your tour”

You followed Chan out and toward the elevator

He stopped at the secretary’s desk

“We’re going to tour the company and then be out for the afternoon so you can leave whenever you like”

You watched as the secretary attempted to keep a conversation going but Chan said goodbye quickly and was leading you toward the elevator in under a minute

But you didn’t miss the dirty look the girl sent you

You knew she would be a problem

You toured the building and met several people

There were a bunch of people and you were amazed by how smooth everything was running

Chan knew what he was doing

You walked around for a couple of more hours

You were on the elevator again when Chan told you where you were going next

“Where do you want to eat lunch? I was thinking barbecue”

“That’s fine I don’t care. Whatever you want”

“Alrighty then barbecue it is”

He led you to his car and opened the passenger door for you

You thanked him and got in

You got there quickly

The place was only around the corner from the building

You went in and got seated quickly

There wasn’t really anyone there

You and Chan didn’t stop talking for the rest of the day

After lunch he took you around to the little shops that surrounded the company

You missed him

And he missed you just as much

You finally got back up to his office and grabbed your bag

“Goodnight Chan. I had a great time. Maybe tomorrow I can get some real work done”

“Yeah but where’s the fun in that? Kidding. I’ll see you tomorrow pancake”

You smiled and walked to the door

But before you could walk out Chan said something else

“I’m glad you called me. I missed you, a lot”

“I missed you too Chan”

You smiled at each other for a couple more seconds and then you turned and left

You got back to your apartment 10 minutes later and flopped onto your bed

“Bang Chan stop this right now. I can’t fall for you again“

But you knew you were already in way too deep

But what you didn’t know was that Chan was laying in his apartment thinking the exact same thing as you

He had fallen for you and now he was screwed

He could never hide a secret well

Although your obliviousness helped a lot

So a couple weeks go by and you and Chan just got closer

You had walked into the office on a Tuesday morning when his secretary stopped you

Over your first couple of weeks you had figured out several things about her

She likes Chan

She see’s you as a threat

And she is just really rude

You asked her what she needed

“I don’t know who you think you are but you will never have a chance with Chan. Why would he like a pig like you anyways?”

“Well I do like barbecue so I guess that helps”

You turned to see Chan standing there giving the girl the scariest look you had ever seen

“I expect everything out of your desk by the end of the day, your fired”

Your jaw dropped

Before anything could be said Chan had grabbed your hand and dragged you into the office

“I’m sorry if I had figured it out sooner she would have been gone a lo-”

“Chan it’s ok. She didn’t bother me. I found it hilarious that she felt so threatened by me”

HE looked at you for a moment before crossing the room to you

You went to say something but he grabbed your face and closed the distance between the two of you

The kiss was intense

He pushed you backwards without breaking contact

You felt your back hit your desk

He grabbed your waist and hauled you onto the desk

You broke away and burst into laughter

He looked at you for a moment before you calmed down

“I’m sorry. It’s not that I don't want to kiss you. It’s just this is the most cliché thing that has ever happened. Like I thought falling for my child hood bestfriend was cliché. But this, this takes the cake”

“Yeah I guess it I pretty lame, but you fell for me?”

“Yeah. I mean how could I not. You should have know. I let you call me pancake even though I hate nicknames for the most part. But I love that you call me that”

“Oh well I guess I’m a bit oblivious”

“Yeah and you try to call me the oblivious one”

You both laughed for a moment before you went quiet

You looked back at each other and Chan leaned down a kissed you again

This time it was soft and sweet

It told you everything he felt

And your heart felt like it was going to burst

You broke away and stood up off the desk

“So waffle, now what?”

“How about a date”

“Sounds good to me. What do you want to do?”

“How about we go for barbecue?”

“Really?”

“Whattttttt I”m hungry”

“Of course you are. C’mon then piggy lets go”

OKKKKKKK Here is your early birthday present Sonette. I hope you liked it:333333- Kenah<3</p>

Masterlist

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whataperfectwasteoftime · 2 years ago

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Oh my gosh.

Every comment on this fic makes me pause and reflect because they all mean so much, but DAMN. DAMN.

Like I said in the A/N, this is the fic I had always WANTED to write for Marcus Pike because, at least as *I* see him, he is perfect for this situation.

he genuinely wants to see her come not because it's the end goal or what's "supposed" to happen or because he needs it for his release, no! It's because it's her pleasure at its euphoric peak, it's all the beautiful reactions he delights in but ramped up x1000 and he wants to see and feel that moment like a devotional supplicant.

LITERALLY THIS YES. Like, he just genuinely wants her to feel good, he wants to be a part of that, he doesn't care HOW or how long it takes or what she needs to do, he just wants to be the one to make her feel good and he does not care what that looks like.

this is a man that fkn GETS IT

Yes. nothing to add. lol.

The POWER of hearing this from him, what an affecting thing to hear for someone with such deep internalized sexual shame and frustration and bad past experiences. Hearing your body talked about in terms of its beautiful, normal, human response, when all you've felt is betrayal from it, felt disconnected from it? Oooof.

This is..... exactly why I wrote this fic, this is exactly what *I* needed to hear and this is my exact experience--all I'd ever felt for a long time (and still do now, to some degree, because brains are hard to rewire) is betrayal and disconnection and shame when it comes to my body and how it works/doesn't work. Yeah. Marcus Pike come undo my years of trauma 2k22.

OKKKKKKK did you somehow infiltrate all of our minds? This is so symptomatic of the way so many of us learn to view ourselves from the outside, from the gaze of the other, as putting on a performance, as "supposed" to be acting a certain way…unlearning that and experiencing the unique joys of sexuality with a caring partner is a GLORIOUS thing to behold.

I mean REAL TALK, HOWWW am I supposed to focus on something that's difficult to do already when there's all these outside stimuli and there's someone WATCHING ME DO IT lol. I think the idea that we are supposed to act a certain way, that sex is in some ways a performance for the other person, is universal.

is this not the most perfect precious Marcus moment ever. I can just SEE his face and I adore it.

Marcus. Is. Having. A. Damn. Blast. In. Bed. Even after how overwhelming it was for her to share her trauma, even after a fucking LOVE confession (which was probably harrowing for him, the poor guy), he is such a playful guy in bed and I will die on this hill.

OK and it must be said, is it not SO HOT how Marcus teases her about the "hardship" of getting to fill her up and feel her for "as long as it takes," the IMPLICATION BEING that he can LAST that long and has mastered the self-control to pleasure his partner for hours without firing off and he's so soft and competent and mature and LORDIE IT'S HOT IN HERE.

I'M DROOLING I HAVE NOTHING TO ADD YES TO ALL, I STAN (MY OWN) SOFT COMPETENT MATURE KING.

Thank you so much for reading and commenting and sharing your experience and thoughts about this fic. I'm not exaggerating when I say every single note on this fic makes me so incredibly happy and full of joy that we are all going through the same things and that we can all relate.

I do wish I had come upon this realization much earlier than in my 30s, would have saved me a lot of heartache in my 20s. LOL. But here we are.

All the Time in the World

Pairing: Marcus Pike x f!reader

Rating: E (SMUT, 18+ only)

Word Count: 5.3k

Warnings: body insecurities, internalized shame around sex and orgasms, use of vibrators, oral sex, fingering, PIV sex (unprotected, but let’s pretend they had that talk “offscreen” because they’ve been together for 2 months), Marcus Pike being the Absolute Fucking Most(™)

Summary: You’ve never been able to climax without the aid of a vibrator. Due to your insecurities and internalized shame, you rarely involve any toys during sex with a partner, and have been “faking it” for years. You and your new boyfriend, Marcus Pike, have been taking your relationship very slowly–building up a beautiful connection without ever having seen each others’ bedrooms. Two months in, neither of you can wait any longer. How will Marcus react when he discovers the thing you consider to be your deepest, darkest secret?

A/N: I know I said that this was on the back-burner until my OTHER Marcus stuff was completed, but then I got such lovely (and heartbreaking) responses to a snippet of this WIP that I picked it up again and couldn’t. stop. writing. This fic wouldn’t exist without @ezrasbirdie ‘s Going Slow, which is the only other fic I’ve read out there that deals with sexual dysfunction, and I can’t post this without acknowledging that her fic really paved the way and made me want to write about MY experiences, however personal, vulnerable, or “unsexy” they might be. It’s really fun to read (and write) about people with clitorises who can have multiple orgasms in one session, by intercourse alone, or by their partner just touching their clit, like, one time. This is not always the case in real life, a fact that is not well-represented in fic despite being very common. I think we should acknowledge that sex and pleasure can and do look different for everyone and can still be fun and sexy to read about. This is the fic I always wanted to write with Marcus Pike. I mentioned in the tags when I posted a snippet of this fic that the reason I write sooooo many Marcus fics is because I’ve kind of made this man an outlet for my trauma around this exact subject. When you’re too insecure or ashamed to prioritize your pleasure, sex can be fraught, even painful. If you’re reading this fic and think, “Hey, that’s me!” please know that you are NOT alone, it’s TOTALLY normal, and you deserve a partner who encourages and prioritizes your pleasure.

Additional thank you's to @leslie-lyman for reading this over and being so lovely and encouraging in the DMs, and to @katareyoudrilling for letting me bare my heart and soul to a stranger on the internet, as one does. I love you both.

Main Masterlist

"Do you wanna come up?"

Those words are always laced with meaning, but with your new relationship, they seem even more significant.

It was no secret that your new boyfriend, Marcus Pike, has had a rough go of things before you started dating. And really, so have you–hence why both of you insisted on taking this fledgling relationship very slowly. It has been two months–two incredible, happy months–since your first date, and the two of you have developed a beautiful connection over dinners, walks, movies, lunch dates, even baseball games, without ever having seen each others’ bedrooms.

You know that you’re falling for him. How can you not? Marcus is considerate and kind, with a secret goofy side that you know he usually tries to hide. It seems as if his arms are meant for cuddling, and he’s generous with his affection, even though the two of you had agreed to keep things chaste until both of you are ready. He doesn’t shy away from difficult conversations, and he’s been forthright about his past hangups and flaws. It’s refreshing, and the fact that he’s so damn earnest makes you want him even more.

The minute those five little words escape your lips, Marcus’s gaze turns to full-blown lust. It’s been really important, really meaningful, to wait–but both of you are at the peak of sexual frustration, and you both know it.

It doesn’t help that Marcus is absolutely gorgeous, with those deep eyes, artfully mussed hair, broad chest and deliciously soft tummy. You and your vibrator have become very close over the last two months, when you would come home after yet another wonderful date staring at his full lips and feeling his large hand at the small of your back, or holding yours as you walked.

One of those hands comes up now to brush the backs of his fingers across your cheek. “Are you sure?” he asks quietly.

“Absolutely,” you answer breathlessly, the word more air than speech.

Marcus leans in close, a small smile on his face as he stops just short of your lips. “Lead the way, then,” he murmurs. You push down a pang of anxiety. You like him so much, want this night to be perfect, but you know better than to assume your body will cooperate. You wonder if he’ll mind if you… if you don’t…

Marcus’s hands travel as you ride the elevator up to your floor–the touches growing bolder, more blatantly sexual than they’d ever been before. He pulls your back flush to his front as the floors tick up, kissing a gentle path down the side of your neck as his fingers scrape over your hipbones and down, his hand resting just above your mound like a promise.

You waste no time when you finally open the door to your apartment–kicking it closed and then grabbing Marcus’s face and pulling it towards yours for a desperate, longing kiss. He makes a surprised little sound and returns your passion in kind, crushing you to him with an intensity you’d never felt from the man.

“C’mere,” you mumble hastily when you come up for air, and you pull him along until you’re stepping into your bedroom. The rush to take each others’ clothes off is more than a little frantic–both of you practically ravenous after so much time spent longing for one another. Shirts and pants are discarded haphazardly in your rush to feel skin against skin. You move to the bed in a tumble of bodies. Marcus is loud–groaning in your ear as he palms your ass and grinds his hips against you.

“Wanted–fuck–wanted this for so long, baby,” he says into your neck. “Been… been wanting to feel your skin against mine, be able to touch you…” he trails off as he starts to move down your body, kissing and nipping with enthusiasm.

“Better than I ever imagined,” Marcus murmured, as he brushes his lips softly–the barest of touches–against your clit, making you whimper softly.

He starts out so gently, licking you as if he’s simply exploring the area–unhurried, leisurely, patiently. As if he’s doing it just for the enjoyment of it, for the feel of your soft skin against his tongue. Every so often, his eyes flick up to meet yours, gauging your reaction as he eats you out.

It feels amazing, of course, but you feel that little tinge of anxiety starting to grow, knowing that even with his obvious enthusiasm and dedication, it probably isn’t going to be enough for you to come.

You and your stupid body.

You aren’t sure how much time he’s been down there already, but you know it’s probably conspicuously long. Suspiciously long. It doesn’t help that you’re starting to freak out a little, stressing out over the time–wondering if you should… should you stop him? Would that insult him? Most guys would have given up by now, and the fact that he hasn’t–fuck. The last thing you want to do is hurt his feelings. You like him so fucking much. You don’t want to ruin it.

Marcus, who is obviously unaware of your inner struggle as he flicks his tongue over your clit and gently thrusts one finger into your soaking cunt, says “Gonna come for me, honey?”

And you know he doesn’t mean to telegraph impatience–he probably meant it to be encouraging, but after he asks the question, you feel the pleasure that he had built up retreating quickly as you stare down at him with an anxious, apologetic expression.

“It’s, um… it’s not–I usually… I-I usually need a vibrator, it’s not you, it’s–” you babble.

Marcus’s eyes are kind and non-judgemental as he looks up at you, the evidence of your desire on his lips. “Grab it,” he says with a smile, as if it’s the easiest thing in the world.

“I… I don’t know…” you murmur, your eyes shifting to the side.

Marcus, realizing that he’s touching on something very sensitive, crawls back up your body to give you a gentle kiss.

“Is everything okay?” he asks, and you ache at the tenderness in his eyes.

“Yeah, it’s fine, it’s just… it’s a hassle, you don’t have to–”

“Why wouldn’t I want to make you feel good?” he asks quietly, his eyes searching yours with growing concern.

You bite your lip nervously. “It’s not just that, it’s–oh, God–it takes forever, you don’t–”

“So?” Marcus is looking down at you, one eyebrow raised in both confusion and amusement. “So what if it takes a long time?”

“Like a really long time. I, um–I dunno, my body just doesn’t seem to work right. I’ve never been able to do it during sex, there’s just too much going on and I–I just get all in my head about it, and I just can’t…” you ramble, your voice rising in pitch as you lay out the most vulnerable part of yourself, laying yourself bare for another person in a way that terrifies you.

“Okay,” Marcus says softly, soothingly. “Okay. Hey, it’s all right.” He strokes your face with his palm as you stare up at him, your lip trembling.

“It still feels good without–um…” you trail off. “Like, I’ll still like it.” You drop your gaze, feeling silly. Feeling small. “I really want you,” you whisper. “I really wanted this night to go well.”

“This night is far from over,” Marcus assures you, a bit of firmness creeping into his voice. “It hasn’t even started, and I think it’s going amazing.” He brushes his thumb across your still-trembling lip and gives you a small, reassuring smile.

“I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable,” Marcus murmurs, “But I really, really, would like to make you come. If you don’t want that, tell me now, and I’ll still make you feel as good as fucking possible tonight,” he promises. “But if you’ll let me, I’d really like to have that vibrator, now.”

He fixes you with a little smirk, his eyes still lust-blown even though you feel as if you’ve completely derailed the moment. You search his expression, but all you can find is patience and earnestness.

Eventually, you nod, and you reach over to your nightstand drawer and fumble around for the little bullet vibrator. Your breath stutters as you hand it to Marcus. It feels like you’re handing far more over to him than just a simple sex toy.

He fixes you with a heartfelt stare. “Do you trust me?” he asks softly.

Marcus smiles when he sees you nod rapidly. “Listen to me,” he says, that little edge of authority sneaking into his voice and making you wetter than ever. “We have all the time in the world. You don’t need to worry about that.” His voice drops in pitch, growing darker and soaked with desire. “I’m a patient man,” Marcus rumbles, dropping his head a little to let his lips slide against yours as he speaks. “And I don’t care if it takes all night.” He smirks. “Fuck, I want it to take all night. Wanna see you spread out underneath me for hours. You see this?” Marcus palms his cock and gives it a lazy stroke. “Look how hard you make me,” he murmurs. “Just the thought of teasing you with this until you fall apart for me makes me so. Fucking. Hard.” He punctuates his last words with a roll of his hips and a gentle little bite on your neck–just hard enough to make your brain spark with pleasure as you feel the sting of his teeth on your skin.

Marcus sits back on his heels and switches the vibrator on. He swirls it around your entrance first, collecting some of the slick that had gathered there. Despite your body’s shortcomings, you really fucking want him, and you can feel yourself dripping for him. He slides the arousal-soaked toy up to tease at your clit, and you whimper as the vibrations start to course through you.

It feels… different, to have someone else do this for you. The movements are just subtly changed, simply by extension of his hands not being your hands. Marcus knows what he's doing, that much is evident, but he can't feel what you feel–he doesn't have the advantage of knowing exactly when to move the vibrator slightly, or swirl it around your clit, or when to just hold it there where you're most sensitive.

When your body is already reluctant, the subtle difference means that the buildup is even slower than when you do it yourself and–and–and–

And there's the fact that there's another person in the room where there never has been before. A person who can see the faces you're making, the shift of your hips, what you sound like–and you start to wonder: do I look stupid? Is he bored? Is he impatient? Am I making the right noises? Is my body okay? Is–

"So fucking pretty," Marcus murmurs, almost to himself, and your eyes–that had been closed in concentration–snap open and meet his warm gaze.

He looks… reverent? In awe? He has a small, fond smile on his face, his lips slightly parted, and his eyes are sweeping up and down your body as if he'll never get his fill of looking at you. When you stare up at him with wide vulnerable eyes, his smile widens.

"You are," he tells you. "You look incredible, laying there and letting me take care of you. Does it feel good?"

You nod thickly. It really does. It might take forever, but you'll enjoy every minute if it means Marcus will keep looking at you as if you're a piece of rare artwork–precious, priceless, irreplaceable. You wonder, just for a moment, if he might lo–

"Can I touch you with my fingers while I do this?" Marcus asks, interrupting your thought.

His eyes are still warm and patient, and despite the fact that laying yourself and all your vulnerabilities bare like this for the first time is absolutely terrifying, you feel safe in his arms.

You find yourself nodding, and the next thing you know, your head is thrown backwards as one of Marcus's thick fingers slides gently inside you.

Marcus chuckles at your intense reaction. "Yeah?" he breathes. "Feels good?"

You whimper in assent, and you feel his finger crook inside you, drawing another gasp from your lungs.

"That's it," he whispers, encouraging you. "Perfect."

He languidly pumps his finger in and out, seeming to instinctively understand that you need him to be slow, careful, steady. He's rubbing on something deep inside you that you can’t reach by yourself, and it’s sending sparks up and down your body, and you can feel something start to build. You close your eyes and try to concentrate on it, on the coil that’s tightening inside you, willing it to snap. You want it so badly.

Your body always seems to do this–seems to hover right on the edge for endless minutes, not willing or able to take the final leap. You teeter back and forth for a while, your brow furrowing as you chase the feeling–chase it before it retreats again, like coaxing a timid animal out of its burrow. The act of pursuing it actively makes the feeling start to recede, and you let out a little frustrated whine.

“I–I don’t know if–if I can–” you stammer out.

“Hey,” Marcus says softly, soothingly. “It’s okay, we’re in no rush.”

He withdraws his finger from your cunt and sucks it into his mouth with a small, pleased sound before laying down next to you, not letting the vibrator leave your clit for a second.

“You’re doing so well,” he husks into your ear. “Just close your eyes and feel it. Don’t worry about anything else. You don’t need to be impatient, we have all the time in the world, remember? I’m not going anywhere.”

You whimper and nod, trying to relax your body–relax, and let it happen, rather than fight for it.

“I’m gonna touch you again, okay?” Marcus says beside you. “If I do anything you don’t like, tell me.”

Marcus moves back between your legs, and, keeping his eyes fixed on you as he sinks his finger back into your cunt. You close your eyes, focusing on the feeling, but not trying to force it along this time. It will happen. It will happen. You breathe and relax, trying not to overthink, trying not to stress out about whether Marcus is happy and focus on your pleasure.

The moment you stop trying to come, you start to feel the coil tightening again. Holy shit. He’s going to cause you to get off. You’re almost in disbelief–no one has ever done this, not once, and it doesn’t feel real. But the gradual tightening of your core is definitely real, and you know Marcus can feel it too because he breathes out a little “yeah” as he rubs his finger right over the little spongy spot that drives you crazy.

“Oh!” is the only thing you’re able to say before the coil finally snaps and you fall apart on Marcus’s finger. You jerk with sensitivity as you clench around him over and over again, but he holds the vibrator steady on your clit until your walls stop trembling and you slump boneless on the bed.

“Oh, fuck yes,” you hear Marcus exhale. “Oh, baby…”

He follows you down, casting the vibrator aside and lying beside you. He pulls you into his arms and you can hear the smile in his voice when he tells you, “That was definitely worth the wait. You look so pretty when you come apart, honey.”

You twitch with another aftershock and you’re suddenly hit with the idea that maybe… you're not a lost cause? Maybe you aren't hopelessly broken? This realization is followed immediately by an intense wave of emotion, flooding all of your senses and overwhelming you, and to your utter humiliation, you realize you're definitely about to start crying.

"M-Marcus," you murmur urgently, trying to distract him so he won't see the tears. "Marcus, please fuck me."

He pulls back to look at you and you do your absolute best to keep the moisture welling in your eyes from falling down your cheeks, but the moment you meet his gaze, you know it didn't work.

"Hang on," Marcus says gently. "Honey, I'm not–I can’t do that while you're crying. Let's just slow down. Like I said, we have all night."

The patience and kindness in his words, his demeanor, just his entire being tonight is enough to send those tears over the edge, and you bury your face in your chest as they start to fall. Marcus’s arms immediately come around you, pulling you flush against him as if he were attempting to take away years of trauma with just his body surrounding yours. You really wish he could.

“Will you tell me about it?” Marcus asks tentatively in your ear.

“I–I’ve never… no one’s ever… done that,” you say quietly. “It’s always been me. I’ve never felt comfortable l-letting anyone–” you trail off, and the room is enveloped in silence again.

You feel Marcus swallow thickly. “Thank you,” he says, his voice raspy with emotion. “Thank you for trusting me with that.”

The two of you simply exist together for a long moment, neither of you speaking again for a long while, and Marcus starts to trail one of his hands up and down your spine softly, making you shiver slightly. Eventually, he speaks again.

“What happened?” he asks. “What happened to make it so scary to let someone else do it?”

You bite your lip, thinking about your answer for a moment. “Nothing… happened, exactly. It’s just… when you spend years and years being frustrated over the fact that your body doesn’t work right, or worse, having partners that are frustrated over it, you eventually give up trying.”

“Oh, honey,” Marcus starts, but you keep going.

“And a lot of it is my fault,” you confess, “I spent my early twenties either not communicating what I need, or not knowing what I need, let alone how to tell it to someone, and those habits are really hard to break. So even when someone was trying, I wouldn’t let them in.”

Marcus pulls back to look in your eyes, and the hand not currently wrapped around your body comes to caress your cheek gently.

“I–then I’m proud of you,” he says quietly, his voice full of sincerity. “And I’m–I’m honored that you feel comfortable letting me in.”

The truth is, if you can’t let yourself be vulnerable with a man like Marcus Pike, you can’t do it with anyone. He’s been so earnest, so utterly genuine as you’ve gotten to know him over the past two months. Already, the two of you have shared so much of yourselves–you know about his past, about the fact that he really struggles with impulsivity, and now, after tonight, he knows your deepest, darkest secret.

“It always felt like the rest of the world knew something I didn’t,” you tell him. “It always seemed like everyone else was having a good time, and I’m over here with a body that doesn’t work right, barely able to get myself off, let alone do it multiple times a night just from someone’s dick like they do in erotic novels.”

Marcus barks out a laugh. “Those are as fake as porn,” he chuckles. “And I think you’re wrong,” he says, sobering up. “Your body works fine. It’s fucking perfect, actually–I just saw it working. I felt it. And you know what?” He playfully bumps your noses together. “I was having a good fucking time.”

You giggle tearfully. “Yeah?”

“Of course, honey. I–I loved being able to do that for you. I loved watching you, I loved those cute little sounds you make, I love how hard you squeezed me, I–I love–” Marcus breaks off, his eyes full of trepidation, as if he’s on the knife-edge of a precipice and about to fall in. “I–”

“What?”

“I–I can’t—I don’t think it follows our rule of taking this slow,” he murmurs.

You smile. Marcus may be holding back from saying it, but he can't hide the fact that it's written all over his face. If you're being honest with yourself, it's been embedded in his expression for a while now–in his eyes as the two of you had walked hand and hand through an art museum, in his voice as he told you about his past failed relationships, even in his body language every time he touches you. Marcus has been showing you how he feels for weeks with his entire body. You can certainly take the leap and tell him.

"I love you," you murmur.

You watch Marcus's face as a million little microexpressions flit across it in the blink of an eye. Finally, his deep brown pools meet yours.

"Yeah, that–that was it," he says with a breathless laugh. "That was what I was–"

"I love you," you say again, this time with more confidence.

“Wow,” Marcus breathes, joy and disbelief written all over his face. “I love you, too.”

It feels as if a huge amount of tension that’s been building for weeks now has suddenly abated, and the two of you start giggling like idiots, sharing gentle kisses in between your giddy laughter. Short kisses become longer kisses, and soon Marcus is rolling you over, covering your body with his as he presses his thumb into the hinge of your jaw and takes.

You give back with equal fervor–fisting your hands in his hair and tangling your legs together as you shift your hips upward, seeking friction.

“I–mmph–fuck, you feel so perfect,” Marcus murmurs in between kisses that are becoming more and more passionate.

“Will–now will you fuck me?” you ask breathlessly.

“Let me check,” Marcus says, pulling back and making a show of studying your face with a mock-serious expression that makes you laugh. “Yep, think I will.”

He sobers for a second, pausing–as if he’s considering something.

“If you’re not comfortable with this, feel free to tell me ‘no,’” Marcus begins, “but I’d really like to make you come again.”

Oh. “I-I’m not sure if I can–” you trail off, trepidation etched over your features for the second time that night.

“It’s okay to say ‘no’ if you’re not comfortable with it,” he says again, “but don’t say ‘no’ because you think it takes too long,” he pleads.

“It might,” you say in a small voice. “‘Cause I already did once, and sometimes it takes a while…”

“What a hardship,” Marcus teases, lightly tickling your ribs and making you squirm. “Getting to fill you up for as long as it takes, feeling you trembling around me.” His hips rock reflexively against yours as he bites the meat of your shoulder. “Such a fucking shame if you kept my cock warm all night.”

You laugh again at his gentle teasing. “You’ve made your point.”

“Is that a ‘yes?’”

“Yes.”

Marcus’s smile could outshine the sun. “Good,” he whispers. “Would it be easiest for you if you were on top?” he asks. “So you can control the pace?”

Truthfully, you’re not sure. It’s been a long time since you’ve attempted to do this–to involve a toy in sex with a partner. It’s rarely been successful, but Marcus’s kindness and patience have already helped to shed some of the weight of this burden you’ve carried for so long by yourself.

When you nod, Marcus gives you one last sweet kiss before moving up to the head of the bed. You bite your lip. You hadn’t really looked at him–not yet–and he’s huge.

“Can we–” you start, “can we um, use–” you nod your head in the direction of a small bottle of lube sitting on your nightstand.

“Absolutely,” Marcus agrees. As you pour a little bit into your hand and experimentally grasp his thick cock–earning a hiss from him–he grabs your wrist gently to get your attention. “Hey,” he says seriously, “don’t ever be afraid to ask for what you need.”

You nod thickly, entranced by Marcus’s earnest expression–by the love in his eyes. After pumping his cock a couple more times, spreading the lube around his shaft, you smear the rest on yourself and start to sink slowly down, inch by inch.

He’s just large enough that the stretch is delicious, but stops short of painful. You hear yourself whimpering as you slide down, letting him fill you, until you’re seated fully on his lap. Marcus is still staring at you with that same lovestruck expression, and you flash him a little smile before experimentally rocking your hips, eliciting a little groan from deep within his chest.

“Here.” Marcus passes the little bullet vibrator into your hand. “Touch yourself, make yourself come. I want to see it. I really wanna feel it.”

You push down the fear of being vulnerable again, the fear of failure, of not being good enough, and you switch it on.

Marcus is so deep inside you. It feels fucking amazing, better than any toy you’ve ever used on yourself. He’s hot and thick and real and his deep brown eyes are still looking at you like you’ve hung the stars yourself, and having him beneath you is overwhelming and distracting in the worst and best of ways. You start to rock your hips slowly, fucking yourself on his cock, grinding against him without rising up off of him all that much. You’re not sure you can make it happen if you’re bouncing quickly up and down, so you keep things unhurried and easy. To your surprise, you can already feel an orgasm building–it’s illusory, it’s subtle, but you can feel it every time you cant your hips just so.

The only problem is, you aren’t sure if it feels good for Marcus–after all, you’re barely moving, most of the motion is caused by your hips flexing and relaxing rhythmically as you grind against him.

“Is–is it okay if I just rock like this?” you ask him timidly. “Is it still good for y–”

“Don’t finish that question,” Marcus interrupts gently. “You feel fucking amazing. You don’t even have to move, if that feels better for you. Just–just feeling you like this is incredible.”

He leans up to give you another passionate kiss. “I love this, and I love you, and I don’t want you to worry, okay? If you ever wonder whether this feels good for me, the answer is always going to be yes.” He smiles and playfully rubs his nose against yours. “Keep going,” he whispers. “Don’t think, just feel.”

As Marcus reclines back against the headboard, his hands travel to your breasts, his thumbs brushing against the nipples, and your pussy clenches. Marcus notices–you can tell by his sharp intake of breath. He fixes you with a dark, fiery stare, a devilish glint in his eyes, and your own breath catches. That felt really good.

“M-more?” you request weakly, still struggling with the concept of asking for what you want.

His thumbs press a little harder, rubbing little circles into the hardened buds, and your head falls back as your hips start to rock a little faster. You can hear yourself making little whimpers and pants as Marcus lavishes attention to your sensitive breasts. He gently flicks one nipple, and you keen loudly, and oh, fuck, that–that’s going to send you over the edge. If he keeps doing that, you’re going to come. You can feel the heat rising to your skin, a wave of pleasure starting to surge up, and up and up and—

“K-keep–” you manage to pant out before another gasp leaves your lips.

Marcus takes your meaning. “Not gonna stop,” he rasps. “Gonna play with these perfect fucking tits until I feel you come around me. I–oh, fuck–honey, I can feel you tightening–holy shit, baby, you’re doing so well, you’re perfect, keep going…”

He keeps talking to you, praising you, talking you through it, as your body teeters on the edge of a cliff for the second time tonight. Please, you beg yourself, please cooperate.

“I’ve got you,” Marcus is murmuring over and over. “I’ve got you, honey.”

You feel your hips lock into place as you reach the point of no return–that point at which you finally know you’re going to fall one way or the other. It’s always such a relief, this little moment of free-fall before your orgasm hits. Your mouth falls open as you embrace the inevitable, and you sob out Marcus’s name as your cunt starts clenching hard around his cock. You’re almost in disbelief, you can’t believe this is happening–first, Marcus being the first person to ever make you come undone by his own hands, then a love confession, and now, you’re falling apart on his cock, the first time you’ve ever allowed yourself to during sex. You laugh in joy in amazement even as your body still shakes with the aftershocks of your orgasm.

Marcus is smiling too as he surges up to meet your lips in an exuberant kiss. “Perfect,” he says against your lips. “So beautiful when you do that.”

He bands his arm around you and flips you on your back, keeping his lips close to yours as he starts to fuck you with deep, long strokes. You're still incredibly sensitive from your last orgasm and it feels like every sensation has been multiplied tenfold. You’re dimly aware that you’re being very loud right now, crying out as he hits the perfect spot inside you over and over, but you don’t care. This is easily the best sex of your life.

Marcus is being loud as well, groaning praise into your ear interspersed with your name as he snaps his hips into you harder and faster. Your hands scrabble for purchase on his shoulders as he ramps up the intensity of his thrusts, and all you can do is gasp and pant his name until he's spilling inside you.

Marcus immediately starts peppering little kisses across your face, holding himself over you as not to crush you, but not allowing himself to slip free from your heat just yet. Your heart is still fluttering with emotion–you love him, he loves you, and he’s patient and understanding and handles you gently, something you wish you had had in your earliest experiences with sex–someone to reassure you that you’re fine, you’re normal, all you need is a little extra care.

Speaking of care, Marcus finally pulls away with a happy little sigh, giving you another soft smile as he goes into your bathroom to find something to clean you with. You watch him from the bed–admiring his shoulders, his narrow hips, his adorable barely-there butt that you really want to pinch… And, of course, those warm brown eyes, that piercing gaze that seems to see right into the very core of you.

You can’t look away, even though holding his gaze as he swipes a warm cloth between your legs seems overwhelmingly intimate.

“Penny for them,” Marcus intones softly, noticing your staring.

“Where were you a decade ago?” you ask with a little laugh.

Marcus fixes you with a wry grin. “Finalizing my divorce,” he answers sardonically.

Oh, right. “Sorry,” you murmur.

“Don’t be,” he says gently. “We’re both here now, that’s what counts, right?” He discards the cloth and lies beside you again, taking you into his arms and kissing you tenderly on the forehead. “After all, we’ve got all the time in the world.”

#comment reblog #long post #very long

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