#okay why were they so cute this episode i was squealing the entire time

[freensrcha]

Just only one person recognize and love what we did, that's more than enough.

BETWEEN US THE SERIES (2022)

[mypoisonedvine]

Animalistic | dark!Peter Parker x reader

summary: your friend Peter has a crush on you, everybody knows it, nobody does anything about it. except, of course, when he gains new powers and loses control of his affections.

word count: 3k

warnings: smut! (non con), degradation, creampie kink, choking, forced begging, peter overall being a huge asshole, everybody is 18+ but heavily implied to be high school seniors

a/n: okay so this was actually inspired by a scene from an episode of buffy (lol) so if you’re a fan and you recognize some of this dialogue then that’s why! I pretty much had to write this as soon as it ended because it was so hot jfc

Peter had always acted slightly strange around you. Not all the time; he was one of your best friends, and 99% of the time you felt completely comfortable around him.

But that 1%... when you went to pool parties together, when you asked him to turn around while you changed, when you bumped into him at Homecoming last year and he looked at you in a way that was definitely more than friendly…

Everyone knew he had a crush on you, they told you constantly. It was pretty much an open secret at this point, you were pretty sure that he knew you knew, and so everyone just knew but never talked about it. Even though it was getting more awkward by the minute as a result, you didn’t see any reason for it to change.

What you didn’t know was that something had changed, something you could never understand fully but which had transformed your friend completely. He had gained new strength, a new power his body could barely handle; and with it, everything he needed to take what he had wanted and longed for but never before could’ve attained.

What you didn’t know was that, while you were cleaning up the AV club meeting room after school, when the building was nearly deserted and the sun was beginning to set, Peter had already found you, and watched you, and waited for the right moment to use his powers of stealth to sneak up behind you. He whispered your name, just past your shoulder, and you whipped around suddenly.

“Peter!” you yelped, stepping back slightly— but he took a step closer. When you stepped to the side to get past him, he stepped just a moment faster and blocked your way. It was like a waltz, but significantly more terrifying. Instantly you knew this was not the Peter you were used to. This was not your best friend, this was not the guy who had laughed with you and cried with you and been by your side all through high school. This was somebody else… and he was way too close for comfort.

“Where are you going?” he asked with a little smirk, dripping with the confidence that you weren’t going anywhere. When you tried to run, he grabbed you; when you tried to break free, he pushed you to the ground, pinning you by your wrists.

“Get off of me!” you cried.

“Is that really what you want?” he pressed. “‘Cause I think you want me. I think you didn’t want to admit it before, but you’re attracted to me— and it’s okay! It’s good. God, I’ve been waiting for so long for you to just accept it…” he trailed off as one hand released your wrist so it could brush across your face.

You swung your freed hand at him, landing a punch; when he raised his hands to his cheek, you managed to squirm out from under him and get to your feet. You hadn’t even taken a step towards the door yet when he had already gotten up and stood in your way, shrugging off the punch like it was nothing as he stalked towards you.

Remember what you learned in Tae Kwon Do, you repeated like a chant in your mind, holding your fists up in a blocking stance, stumbling slightly when you backed into a desk behind you. “I don’t wanna hurt you, Peter.”

He lunged forward and grabbed you, roughly slamming you against the wall as he pinned you again and you sobbed with terror. “Do you wanna hurt me now?” he taunted. “Go ahead and try, I like seeing you fight—” he leaned in closer, until you could feel his breath against your ear— “and knowing it’s fucking useless.”

“S-stop,” you whimpered, “Peter, please— this isn’t you.”

“But it is me, sweetheart,” he growled, smiling with teeth so much sharper than you remembered. “Did you really think I’d wait forever, crushing on you from the sidelines, watching you date all those douchebags who didn’t ever treat you right and never taking you for myself? I was just puny little Peter, your dumb geeky friend you thought you were too good for.”

“No!” you denied. “No, Peter, I never thought that.”

“You like ‘em mean, don’t you?” he chuckled, ignoring you completely. “That’s why you keep dating these guys who treat you like crap. You want mean, you want dangerous, you want strong and brutal and… animalistic. I can do that. I can do mean.”

“Peter, please don’t—”

He took a long, slow breath in through his nose, letting his eyes fall shut as he smiled with satisfaction. “You don’t need to be so scared,” he whispered, “but I kinda like it. The more I scare you, the better you smell.”

You opened your mouth to ask what the fuck he was talking about, but words didn’t come to you as he leaned in and attaching his lips to your neck, licking and sucking at your pulse point. A breathless whimper spilled out from between your lips as you shivered beneath him, feeling his smile of satisfaction on your skin.

He kicked your legs apart, slotting his body between them and laughing as he rocked his hips against yours; but he wasn’t laughing at that, he was laughing at the fear he must have smelled on you when you felt his hard cock between your legs. “Hmm, you’re thinking it’s a little big, right? You’re thinking ‘wait a second, how am I supposed to take all that?’ Don’t worry, sweetheart, you’re gonna love it. You’re gonna love coming all over this thick, aching cock…”

He purred— a low, deep sound that echoed through his chest and rattled your heart— as he started to pull your jacket off roughly, not finding your resistance much trouble at all. Your shirt, though, he ripped through like it was paper; you winced and looked away, unable to stomach the sight of him licking his lips as he tore through your bra, too.

“Look at these pretty tits,” he cooed, reaching up to grab them roughly, twisting the nipples and watching them harden under his ministrations. “You like that, huh? You like having your tits played with? Is this how your asshole exes did it, too?”

You shook your head, afraid that he would hurt you more if you didn’t answer at all.

The relief you experienced when he took his hands off of your chest was short-lived, as his touch drifted down to your jeans instead.

“No, Peter,” you gasped, your eyes shooting open as he glared back down at you while he unbuttoned and unzipped your fly. “Wait, wait, you don’t— you don’t have to do this.”

“I know. I want to,” he asserted as he roughly pulled your jeans— and panties— down to your ankles. You cried as he instantly dove in between your legs, licking you eagerly, holding you down with a vice-tight grip on your thighs. Every movement of his tongue shot jolts of pleasure up your body, making your head fall back against the wall. “Fuck,” he mumbled, his voice muffled by your sex in his mouth, “your pussy is fucking delicious, sweetheart.”

When you tried to push him away, all you managed to do was card your fingers through his hair, and he grinned before latching his lips onto your clit. You cried out, your hips bucking and quivering against his face.

“You gonna come, honey? You’re so close, I can taste it…”

“No,” you denied, “no— you’re wrong, I don't—”

“You like it,” he snarled. “You like how it feels when I fuck you with my tongue. See?” Just for emphasis, he had to thrust his tongue inside you, making the most filthy squelching noises as the wetness of his mouth collided with the wetness your body had produced for him so easily. “Just come,” he encouraged. “It’ll make you nice and tight for when I put my cock in you.”

You fought it with everything in you, but with the way he held you down and forced the barrage of sensation on you, it was impossible to avoid. Disturbingly, it was not in spite of the fear that you hit your peak; if anything, it actually made it stronger, mixing with your arousal to create a delicious sickness in your gut as the coil snapped and you gasped his name, falling apart atop his face as your thighs clamped down on his head against your will.

When his tongue broke away from you, pulling back with a come-slickened grin, you shuddered. “Was that so hard?” he faux-pouted. “I knew it. I knew you wanted me. See how good I can make you feel? Well, it’s only gonna get better.”

“W-wait,” you stammered as he stood up, but he paid no mind, grabbing you by the neck and forcing you to spin around and face the wall. He slapped your ass, hard, before you heard the sound of his belt being unbuckled. You didn’t see it, you never saw it, but you felt it as he pressed the hot, hard shape against you. You bit back a squeal as you felt how thick it was, tears striping your face as he laughed at you again: cruel, mocking, cold.

“Yeah, this cock’s gonna be inside you, sweetheart. Finally.”

“Don’t… please don’t…” you sighed weakly, just above a whisper.

He pulled your hips back roughly, forcing you to arch your back. You felt so exposed, almost like you were in display for him, as he teased your sensitive clit with the head of his cock. “You can keep begging if you want, it’s kinda cute.”

You knew you were past the point of stopping him, but you hoped you could at least reason with him slightly, or bargain with him in any way. “Please…” you whispered, “don’t make it hurt. Please just be gentle.”

He laughed. And he’d laughed so many times before, but this was different. This time was almost genuine, like it was actually funny to him. He laughed so hard that it sounded like he would lose his breath, until it all came to a sudden stop and he pressed his entire body against your back, growling into your ear: “No.”

He shoved his cock into you, all the way to the hilt, holding your hips still so he could bury himself in your heat. “Fuck!” he groaned, already pulling back and slamming into you brutally. “You’re so fucking tight, sweetheart.”

The praise made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, even with his warm breath against the skin there. His intrusion stung, made your insides burn with the force of his rough movements. Worst of all was how good it felt, against everything that made you want to hate it. His cock filled you better and reached deeper in you than anything ever had before, and your earlier orgasm made everything more sensitive. His balls were slapping against your clit with each thrust, and as lewd as it was, it was just as perfect as you shivered from every brief-yet-powerful touch.

Your sobs morphed to moans, exacerbated by his hands roughly grabbing your breasts again once his arms had wrapped around you.

“Oh, I know you love it so much,” he cooed with a taunting grin. “Tell me how good it feels.”

Before you’d even really gotten a chance to shake your head, he wrapped his hand tightly around your neck, cutting off your air as you opened your mouth in search of a breath you couldn’t reach.

“You get to breathe when you’re ready to be honest,” he explained gruffly, “with me and with yourself. Tell me,” he repeated, harsher than before, “how good it feels.”

As soon as he released his grip on your pulse, you cried out. “So good!” you sobbed. “So good, Peter, it f-feels so good…”

“Good enough to make you come?” he smirked. “I think so, with the way this needy little cunt is squeezing me so tight already. Are you close, baby? Fuck, I hope so, I wanna see you come for my cock.”

You breathed through your teeth, hoping you could will yourself not to, but at this point was it even worth the effort? Maybe giving into him really was the best thing— you’d already told him how good it felt, you’d already come from his mouth, you’d already pleaded weakly for him to be gentle only for him to fuck you with a vengeance. How much more dignity could you possibly lose?

“Beg me to let you come,” he instructed, “and then beg me to come inside you.”

Okay, so that’s a lot more dignity you had left to lose.

“N-no, Peter,” you whimpered, “I’m not— you can’t— I’m not on—”

You were cut off with a choke again, your cries sputtering into silence. “You should learn to do what you’re told,” he grunted. “I’ll keep choking you until you pass out, I don’t care. If you want to breathe, don’t take that air for granted. Beg.”

You shook your head against the grip on your neck, even with the spots of black dancing at the edge of your vision. Your hands clawed at his, uselessly fighting his impossible strength.

“Are you ready to beg yet, sweetheart?” he whispered. With hot tears filling your darkening eyes, you finally nodded. He let go and a gasp filled your lungs.

“Please, Peter,” you cried instantly, voice still hoarse and weak from the lack of air, “please— let me come. I wanna come for you, please…”

“That’s good,” he encouraged, “keep going.”

“Please!” you yelped, repeating it over and over until the word had lost all meaning and just because the noises of your despair as pleasure filled you past the point of no return. You were terrified of what would happen if you came without his permission, and worse, you were sure he would be able to tell since he could feel your walls pulsing and, apparently, smell your fear which was a horrifying thought.

“Okay, baby,” he groaned, pumping into you faster and harder until your hips were slamming into the wall in front of you painfully. “Go ahead and come for me.”

“Fuck!” you cried, your legs shaking as you tried to hold yourself up on wobbly knees, pleasure rocking your body ruthlessly and relentlessly. You heard him chuckle softly against your ear, mumbling his approval, but his words were just static in the pleasured haze of your mind, your body limp and drained of all fight as he used your body to chase his own high.

“Now beg me to come inside you,” he reminded you with a growl. “Beg me to fill up this little pussy with my come.”

“I can’t,” you breathed, barely audible.

“Oh, sweetheart, it’s not that hard. Are you too dumb to beg, little baby? Are you all stupid now that my cock’s in you?”

You whimpered but couldn’t muster words.

“All you can do is whine and cry like the dumb baby you are, hm? Then I don’t think you get to breathe anymore,” he frowned, disappointed as he tightened his hand around your neck again.

“Wait—” you pleaded with the last of your breath, feeling his grip hesitate. “Please,” you gasped, swallowing dryly to try to stomach your own words, “please come inside me… fill up my… my little pussy, with your come, please, Peter.”

He grinned, giving you a chaste kiss on the cheek. “Good job, sweetheart,” he praised, “you’re gonna get exactly what you’re asking for…”

You grimaced as you felt him start to flex and pulse inside you, warmth spreading between your legs and leaking out of you to drip down around his cock.

“Fuuuuuck,” he groaned slowly, your name leaving his lips in a sigh as he started to catch his breath.

And then it was just the two of you, alone in this empty classroom, sweaty and panting and sticky in the worst possible places.

The moment he pulled out of you and stepped back, his weight no longer holding you up against the wall, you crumpled to the floor. When he observed you lying there, he seemed proud of his work.

You sort of expected him to just leave you on the floor, but he was gentlemanly enough to help you up and even to pull your jeans up for you, dooming you to a fate of ruined panties as his come seeped from your abused entrance. Your shirt and bra were ruined, meaning you would have to put on your jacket and zip it up all the way to be able to get off of campus without some indecent exposure.

"This was fun," he announced, "we should do it again some time."

"Yeah, no thanks," you scoffed as you started to walk towards the door— but he stopped you by grabbing your arm, turning you to face him.

"You can go, for now," he hissed, "but I'm not anywhere near done with you. Understand?"

You nodded sheepishly, and he finally let go. Like you'd wanted to more than anything since he'd appeared behind you, you finally slipped out through the door. You tried not to think about what had just occurred. You tried not to think about his promise that it would happen again. You tried not to think about how he had made you come taster and harder than you ever had before.

Maybe he was right, and you really do like 'em mean after all.

[magnumdays]

Magnum PI 4.08 -  A Fire in the Ashes review

Can we just start with some slight squealing? Mostly because Magnum being kick-ass to go save Higgy is what my dreams are made of and I loved it. But just all around I feel like we need some squealing because this freaking episode, then next week Christmas and in the new year we start of with Dream Lover... I just feel excited that is all.

(Stupid Tumlr for not having an auto save, I seriously need to stop writing in this editor, I lose my review like four times each week and have to re-write...)

And because excitement (and stupid tumblr) , this is mostly going to be ramblings of why I liked 4.08 and some thoughts on the next few episodes...

So, because I like being contrary, let’s start with the end.

Even if I feel like  Rick’s story line got sidetrack/cut and therefor it was a bit jarring that he was suddenly on a roof about to shoot some guys, I enjoyed a bit of Rick and Juliet bonding over having had rough days but good (if annoying friends.) Lighting here is fantastic!

I also loved the bit just before where everyone is just “today sucked” and Kumu jokes about the milk not being sour and then Magnum and Higgins walk in together... 

IDK but gave me major mommy/ daddy coming home to the kids vibes. And I do like that she says she’s sorry even though no one has asked her to, and I like that TC is like it’s fine we got it, we’re just happy you’re okay. I want friends like that too!

And Magnum is all smiles to hearing TC and everyone ‘forgives her’, because of what she said back in the server room. About how he and the guys helped her move on and basically saved her from becoming consumed by dark emotions and hate for MI6 after Richard. 

I think the “I got out! I have people who care whether I live or die.” bit was really important for her to say and and for him to hear.

(Also, I love the lighting in this scene too, it’s really cool!)

So even if I was there hoping for the angst from Magnum side about her not trusting him, he kind of knew all along something was up. He is a really good private detective after all. He was just letting her have her space. Until things started getting serious. There for nothing to be upset about? Right? 

(We do have what might be him telling her she’s on the naughty list next week, but I highly doubt it has to do with this...)

Realizing Higgy is in trouble Magnum decided to remind us all why he is the character the White Knight is based on. Because, come on! Swoon worthy. He basically took on an entire organization of bad guy-spies to get to her. And this bit with the bullet/shell catching, that just... it just made me so happy.

Also Higgins might have had a pretty bad day, but in the end there, I think (despite watching Eve get shot) I think it wasn’t so bad. 

Magnum did come to her rescue even after she told him not to. And she realized she wanted that. She wanted him to, she was happy he did even. Which is new for her, because while she might have been able to have saved herself, thanks to him, she didn’t have to. She never has to be alone or do it on her own unless she wants to ever again. I think this is finally starting to sink in, or at least I hope we’ll see more of her trusting Magnum even more moving forward.

Also loved that they gave us Gordon cooking for Rick. I mean honestly it’s so cute that Gordon likes cooking and I need to make sure to remember it in more of my fics!

Only a few thigns I was a bit iffy about was  where Higgy is all “can’t hack it, gotta find and destroy IRL” was kind of funny, like why not just hack the whole server and just destroy everything? Surely that must be possible for a hacker-baddie like Higgins? But for the drama I guess.

And bad guys being all “here, interrogate this MI6 agent” - come on? Higgins should have gone? Wait, what? I’m a super spy hacker and you want me to interrogate this lady? I’m going to need some more information. Also don’t you have interrogation specialists for this? I’m just saying she should have protested a bit or just known they were already super-onto her. Which I guess she did kind of know and she was buying time more than anything with the puncy-punch-Eve. 

(And why does Perdie look about twelve here? Seriously, this screenshot is giving me tween sleepover movie vibes. Get the feel she about to be dared to kiss the cute boy at a party with only soda while figuring out the guy next door is stealing puppies or something.)

Side note on while I love Magnum coming to ‘the rescue’ what if Eve had not been found out? I mean, what if the plan had been going right? Higgins had been there, trying to get into the server room and just chilling and - WHAM - Hi Juliet, I’m here to save you! And she didn’t need saving? I mean, that would have blown the whole op. 

Though he wouldn’t have gone bargaining in if he hadn’t learnt about the whole “prepare to dispose of two bodies” form the warehouse guy. Also Magnum calmly heating a Lye bath and threatening a guy...

Hot. So freaking hot.

(Sorry, I’ve been reading too many mafia romances lately...)

But can we talk a little about Magnum being just totally one-track mind trying to find/help/figure out Higgins? Like even when Rick is all messed up and upset, he’s freaking about where the heck Juliet is. And I do like that he’s all ‘I’m going to find Juliet’ because while he has been using her first name more often, it’s still not all the time so it feels more weight-y when he does. Then at the warehouse when the guy is all “I was supposed to dispose of two bodies” our boy goes full on Jack Reacher and goes to save her! 

So yeah,

I enjoyed and I will be happily re-watching this episode a bunch. Waiting for gifs that are better than the ones I manged. 

As for next week... it hopefully will be fun, as the trailer makes it seem, rather than kind of serious with a hostage thing like the summary says. Though mostly summaries have a tendency to be right, so maybe a mix of fun holiday and little bit more seriousness? 

I wonder how much Lia we’ll actually get, as it seems like it is mean to focus on her past a bit. We got hints of that in this episode, so I think we’re kind of fairly clear on Lia’s brother being involved in the attack on the precinct right? 

(Why do I weirdly want Magnum to end up shooting her brother to save Gordon? Like super duper trauma? Since it’s Magnum PI it’s probably going to be brother redemption arch, but you never know!)

Dream Lover 4.10... I guess we shall see if we get another Miggy smooch-y. If we do, I’m seriously wondering if they’re planing to sail this ship this season :O 

I mean, we all know they are at some point, it’s just if they’re going to wait until the last ever episode or actually give us Magnum and Higgins triying to figure having a relationship out. I think they could totally make that work, because 76% of the show is already their partner-ship relationship. But they might just make a mess of things. But honestly, I’d probably be okay with mess-y as long as I got me some more of this!  

Just saying...

[intheticklecloset]

Girls' Night (My Hero Academia)

Primary Universe

Summary: During an innocent trip to the fridge for a drink, Todoroki inadvertently gets cornered by the girls of Class 1-A, who are more than a little curious to see for themselves how ticklish he really is.

A/N: I mean...come on, is this not the cutest idea ever? I loved writing this one! Ticklish Todoroki is one of my favorites. Enjoy! ^^

Word Count: 1,344

~~~

“Girls, wait, I…” Todoroki stammered, looking up at the five – well, six, though he technically couldn’t see Hagakure – faces looming above him. “W-Why are we doing this?”

“Because it’s adorable!” Hagakure replied in a high-pitched squeal of excitement. Around her, the others nodded their agreement.

“But I thought this was a girls’ night.” Todoroki blushed as his arms were pulled above his head, Momo straddling his waist. “I-I’m not…”

Uraraka giggled. “Relax, we’re not going to torture you. That’s not our style.”

“No,” Tsu agreed. “We saw you on the bus and thought it looked like fun.”

“So we decided we wanted to see how ticklish you are for ourselves.” Jirou nodded toward Momo. “Although this one already got to test it.”

Momo blushed and looked away, a small smile on her lips. Todoroki opened his mouth to protest more, but that’s when he felt fingers in his underarms and poking along his ribs, and he couldn’t help but giggle, clenching his fists.

How had he gotten into this situation? He’d been minding his own business, heading downstairs to grab a can of Coke from the fridge to help him power-study tonight. He wanted to get all of his work done early so he could enjoy spring break, which had officially started as of the end of today’s classes. But somewhere between his getting to the kitchen and his leaving it, the girls – who were all camped out in the living room for a slumber party, complete with pillow forts and a lot of snacks – called him over for a moment, and that had led to him being pinned to the floor at all of their mercy, knowing full well he wouldn’t be able to hide how sensitive he was from any of them.

All of it was embarrassing and flustering, and yet…he knew he would have a lot of fun, too.

“P-Plehehehehehease be cahahahareful,” he said, squirming instinctively. The girls pinning his arms down held him even firmer. “I’m r-reheheheheally ticklish.”

“We can’t wait to see it,” Jirou teased, scribbling her fingers along his ribs and sides, smiling when he couldn’t hold back his stream of giggles.

Momo moved next, trailing her long nails over his open belly and waistline, making him twitch and grin widely, trying to hold back but failing miserably. Jirou continued working on his upper torso, while Uraraka and Tsu managed his underarms. All of the tickling was light and bearable – for now.

“Come on, Todoroki,” Mina teased, grabbing his knees and squeezing. “Let it out. We won’t judge.”

“Yeah, we think it’s super cute!” Hagakure added from somewhere behind Yaoyorozu. “Right, Momo?”

“Um, yeah.” Momo blushed, but kept up her gentle, teasing tickles.

Todoroki replied merely by continuing to giggle, twitching and jerking at each new ticklish touch, his smile so wide it almost hurt.

“I’m not getting any reaction here,” Mina hummed. “Where were Deku and Bakugou tickling him that made him laugh so hard?”

“I think it was here, wasn’t it?” Tsu asked, digging a little harder into his underarm.

Todoroki let out a loud yelp, his smile widening. “P-Plehehehease be careful!”

“Oh~ So it’s your armpits, huh?” Jirou teased, nodding at Uraraka. “Get him, you two.”

“No, wait! Please, wait – NOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!” Todoroki tossed his head back and laughed, trying his best to wiggle even a bit but going nowhere fast thanks to the weight on his arms and hips keeping him firmly where he was. “NAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! PLEHEHEHEHEASE!!”

“Awww!” The girls cooed in unison, only making him blush and laugh harder. “Look at him! He’s so ticklish!”

“This is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen,” Jirou chuckled, using her earphone jacks to wiggle into his lower ribs while her fingers focused on his upper ribs. “Tickle, tickle~”

“STAHAHAHAHA – PLEHEHEHEHEHEHEASE!!” Todoroki cut himself off from saying “stop” just in time, letting out a loud squeal when Uraraka and Tsu started kneading into his armpits. “AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA NOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!”

Momo blushed furiously at the sight before her, though she was enjoying it immensely, if the huge smile on her face was any indication. She bravely reached under his white t-shirt to scribble along his bare skin directly.

“PLEHEHEHEHEASE, IT TIHIHIHIHIHICKLES!! GIRLS, PLEASE – NONOTTHERE!!” He suddenly screeched, arching his back as much as possible, nearly bucking Momo off of his hips. All of them stopped, surprised. “Nononono, please not there, not that! It tickles too much! Please!”

“Not where?” Uraraka asked, genuinely confused until she saw Mina’s grinning face behind Momo, pointing dramatically to the half-and-half hero’s feet. “Oh, I see. Are your feet really ticklish?”

“T-They’re…yes, they’re extremely ticklish,” Todoroki admitted, struggling beneath their firm hold but still going nowhere fast. “Please, d-don’t…not there!”

There was a long silence as the girls looked among themselves, seeming to debate what to do. Finally, Uraraka, Tsu, and Jirou left their places at his upper body and crawled over to join Mina and Hagakure. Momo stayed where she was, continuing to straddle him and pin him in place.

Todoroki brought his arms down gratefully, but five of the six girls being so close to the spot he’d just begged them not to tickle was making him nervous. “Girls?” He felt weight on his shins, keeping him from moving his legs whatsoever, and his heart began to race anew. “N-No, wait, please, not there, I beg you!”

“It’s okay, Todoroki,” Momo said, smiling sweetly at him. “It’s just for a minute.”

“I c-can’t handle – NOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!” Todoroki quickly lost his composure once again, throwing his head back with hysterical laughter as more fingers than he could count scribbled and scraped along his bare soles, sending him into fits of laughter he hadn’t even known were possible until now. He desperately tried to grab at anything he could – the couch, the coffee table, the girl straddling his hips – but all he could manage was to flop around like a fish out of water and laugh so hard he thought he might run out of breath.

“STAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAP!!” He pleaded, pounding the ground weakly as he rolled from side to side, the ticklish shockwaves sending more sensations through his body than he could handle at once. He was losing his mind. “PLEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEASE!! I CAN’T – I CAHAHAHAHAHAHAN’T TAHAHAHAHAHAKE IT!! GIRLS!! MEHEHEHEHEHEHEHERCY!!”

Momo watched his face carefully, judging whether he could breathe, whether he was truly in distress, whether he was having fun or not. For a short while it looked like he was enjoying himself despite his hysterical pleading, but the instant his eyes went from happy to panicked, she put an end to his ticklish torture.

“All right, girls,” she called over her shoulder, “that’s enough.”

The others stopped instantly, willing to follow her lead, and they all climbed off of him and sat back, letting him curl up into a ball on his side as he let out some leftover giggles.

Uraraka put a hand on his shoulder gently. “You okay?”

“Y-Yeah, I’m fine,” Todoroki replied breathlessly, still chuckling even as he groaned into the carpeted floor. “You girls are ruthless.”

They all giggled at him.

“If it’ll make you feel better, you can hang out with us for a little while,” Momo offered. “We have snacks. It’s the least we can do.”

“I don’t want to impose on your girls’ night,” he replied, sitting up. “Plus, I have studying to do.”

“Studying?!” they all cried, aghast.

“But it’s spring break!” Mina exclaimed.

Todoroki couldn’t help but laugh all over again. “Relax, I’m not going to study the entire break. I just wanted to get a little bit done tonight so I can enjoy the rest of the week off.”

“Well, before you do that, why don’t you watch an episode of an anime with us?” Jirou suggested, handing him a bowl of pretzels. “It’ll help you feel better for what we just put you through. Then you can study. Sound fair?”

Todoroki hesitated, then accepted the bowl and popped a pretzel into his mouth. “Just one episode,” he agreed, and all of the girls squealed in excitement and queued up the show, settling in to watch.

[jacscorner]

So I finally finished Season 1 of Code Lyoko! One down, 3 more to go I think! And...ho boy, X.A.N.A. continues to be terrifying! I forgot to mention the times they tried to ram a bus of kids into a power plant and had a movie anamatronic choke out Ulrich and Yumi in front of Sissi. Like, imagine if they couldn't return to the past. Imagine how traumatized Sissi and would've been after seeing Ulrich, her crush, and Yumi, a potential friend, nearly slowly die right in front of her.

Oh, yeah, and he just reverses gravity. Like, yeah, no big deal. X.A.N.A. can just reverse gravity. WHY DIDN'T THEY TRY THIS AGAIN?!

Actually, all of the Lyoko Warriors could probably use some therapy. These middle schoolers are fucked...

So here's Part 2 of 'Code Lyoko is a Horror Show'!

Killer Music, where X.A.N.A. basically puts people into comas with music. Free music that can be downloaded off the internet with full on Joker smiles. Odd nearly fucking dies, dudes! Holy hell!

Amnesia, X.A.N.A. basically hacks nanomachines to give Ulrich amnesia. Like...first of all, imagine if he managed to do this to ALL of the Lyoko Warriors. Instant win! And imagine if X.A.N.A. tried AGAIN and could better control them while they were asleep. Surgically fuck up their brains so they forget how to breathe.

The Robots, where X.A.N.A. just nearly causes the robot appocalypse like Skynet.

Rock Bottom?, X.A.N.A. can just...melt the ground, nearly drowning Jim in mud.

Routine, which is a REALLY good one. Cause not only does X.A.N.A just make consecutive attacks on the Lyoko Warriors, probably mentally draining them from having to constantly fight, return to the past, repeat days-you'd think this would be an entire episode, X.A.N.A. just wearing them down, but apparently hacked the virtualization program so when they DIE IN LYOKO THEY DIE FOR REAL!

Oh, but the icing on the cake for me was Ghost Channel; X.A.N.A. traps Odd, Ulrich, and Yumi in a fake Earth and basically has them at their mercy. It's actually one of my episodes cause Jermie got to save the day. It's a very different fight with X.A.N.A. and really shows the friendship the Lyoko Warriors have with each other, but also shows that X.A.N.A. is learning. His knowledge of humans isn't perfect, but he made a damn good attempt.

And naturally, the Season 1 finale happened and yup, there was the episode where Jim was temporarily part of the group and Aelita finally touched grass. And...

Okay, 1. THIS, this is why I love nerd romance in my fiction, cause fuck, Jeremie and Aelita are SO FUCKING CUTE together.

2. It's honestly kinda baffling how they never thought to keep Jim on the team permanently. Yeah, status quo is God and if Jim was in on it, he might squeal to someone or something.

But, like, when he goes off to fight X.A.N.A.'s virtualized monsters with a nail gun, it honestly just makes sense for him to be a part of the team full time. He can help them get away, he can hold down the fort and protect the school while the others go to Lyoko where they're of better use-remember, the sooner they can deactivate the tower, the sooner they stop X.A.N.A.'s plot and can stop people from dying, something going back in time doesn't fix.

And yeah, I know about William, and we'll get there when we get there, but, like, the Lyoko Warriors should've really considered adding more to their numbers sooner. But, yeah, there was probably meta reasons for why they didn't.

But tune in next time for when I scream about why Sissi, Nicholas, and Herb should've joined the Lyoko Warriors. :P

[imagining-in-the-margins]

Here to Misbehave (Pt. 20 | S.R.)

Series Masterlist | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19 | Part 20 | Part 21 | Part 22 | Part 23 | Finale |

Summary: Reader lies to Spencer.

A/N: Please read the content warnings for this one if you have basically any triggers, lol. This is a very heavy chapter - it is the penultimate climax of the story. Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!Reader Category: Angst (NSFW) Content Warning: 🚨 IMPORTANT – READ BEFORE READING🚨 This episode covers a number of very dark topics, and should be approached at a time when you have support systems available. Potential triggering topics include: sexual assault, violations of consent, suicide, self-harm, pregnancy/termination, infertility, domestic dispute, fighting, and underage drinking, sex w/ blanket consent Word Count: 11K

MASTERLIST

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Rossi’s house was every bit as extravagant as I had expected. I had come in honestly hoping to be slightly disappointed so I could mock him for it, but, as always, he had to force his appearance to be as unnecessarily elegant as possible.

That being said, I was a little surprised to find that most everyone gathered in one spot - the kitchen. It was only to be expected, considering it was usually the happiest room in the home. That certainly remained true for Rossi. But they were also all gathered there because that was where the wine was – wine that I was not allowed to drink.

Rossi didn’t have a problem with it… Spencer did. Because of course he did. And while I politely declined when Rossi offered me some, anyway, I found another offer a little more tempting. Which explains why I found myself clutching Derek’s flask and draining half the contents quickly enough to remind him that I was, in fact, in college.

And if anyone were to ask, I would simply tell them that we were hanging out in the hall outside the bathroom to have a very deep and secret heart-to-heart about our shared love for a certain mop headed genius. It would have been the perfect cover to use on pretty much everyone except…

“Ahem.”

The sound of Spencer’s throat clearing behind me was enough to cause me to choke, and I quickly tossed the closed flask back to an already giggling Derek as I shouted, “Fuck!” I didn’t even turn around when his hand snaked around my hip. Instead, I just groaned.

“The narc’s here,” I whispered to Derek, but he knew better than to answer.

“The narc?” Spencer balked, much to his friend’s delight.

“It was fun while it lasted,” Derek offered in consolation, taking a swig out of the flask and earning a very defensive glare from my boyfriend. In fact, Spencer seemed downright pissed, which wasn’t what I had been expecting when I agreed.

Oops. What’s the male equivalent of a cat fight?

“Morgan, didn’t you lecture me about her drinking underage a few months ago?” he snapped, grabbing the flask from a more than willing Derek. Spencer sniffed the contents and immediately recoiled, tossing it back again.

“She’s not my girlfriend,” he mumbled, shooting a glance down to see me sort of just making heart eyes at the sight of my boyfriend being a stupid level of jealous that I'd been caught in the hallway with another boy.

“How does that make it better? That makes it patently worse,” he argued. Derek might have responded to it, too, if I hadn’t latched myself onto Spencer’s side.

“You’re so cute when you get all stupid and possessive,” I drawled, burying my face in his shoulder in what I think was supposed to be a playful kiss, but actually just ended up being a muffled laugh.

“That,” Derek chuckled, pointing to me teetering back and forth on my heels at Spencer’s side, “That is my cue to leave.” With one final wink, he whispered, “Don’t be too hard on him, Princess.”

Spencer’s angry sigh and entirely stiff posture should have served as my warning, but it was just funny to me at the time.

“They all think I’m the boss of us,” I giggled. “Me! The boss!”

“You’re drunk.” His tone dropped the second Derek was out of earshot, and on intimidation alone, he managed to back me against the wall.

“So is everyone but you. They won’t even notice,” I mumbled, although the more the hallway started to spin, the less I believed that. I'd never been very good at math or shots, and this was a pretty horrible miscalculation of just how much of my tolerance I’d lost.

“You really couldn’t wait a few more months? Or at least until we got home?”

He was chastising me, and I just wasn’t there to hear it. I probably could have figured it out if I’d tried, but it all sounded like sexy nonsense at the time. Walking my fingers down his chest, I paused at his belly before hooking them in his pants and pulling his hips against mine.

“I’m allowed to drink if my daddy says so,” I purred.

Spencer didn’t find my taunt as charming as I’d hoped, and before I knew it his hand was roughly pressed over my jaw. He tilted my head back to look him in the eyes, and I wondered if he could smell the whiskey on my breath.

“Well, I didn’t,” he growled.

I never said I was a perfect person, or even a smart one. And when I was drinking and Spencer whipped out his Daddy voice, I don’t know what he really expected me to do. But apparently, trying to grab his dick through his pants was the wrong move. He snatched my hand away quickly, slamming it against the wall before he continued his little impromptu lecture.

“I’m not rewarding you for this. We’re going home.”

“That’s not a very scary threat,” I deadpanned, throwing my body weight back against the wall.

That lasted about four seconds before he pulled me back to my feet and leaned forward to whisper in my ear. “Just wait, little girl. Just you wait until I get my fucking hands on you.”

I was going to make a snarky joke, to remind him that his hands were surely and firmly already on me, but I never got the chance. We were both too distracted by the very loud and very high pitched squeal of Penelope as she rounded the corner.

“Ah! I saw nothing!” she shouted, covering her face with her hands and refusing to remove them.

“Yeah, because we aren’t doing anything,” I laughed. But then, being the slightly cruel brat that I was, I stuck my tongue out at Spencer before tacking on a completely unnecessary, “anymore.”

“We weren’t doing anything before either!” he squeaked back. He wasn’t using his Daddy voice anymore. So swiftly, so easily, he’d been knocked from his higher footing.

Penelope took the words to heart, but only enough to slowly lower her fingers and peek between them. With a shaky voice and an awkward laugh, she started to rant. “Oh. It’s fine. I’m cool. We’re all cool. We don’t have to talk about that thing from the first time I met you ever again. Because we said we’d never talk about it again, do you remember that?”

“I do remember that,” I answered with a very sarcastic tone and a nod.

“And I just brought it up again, didn’t I?”

“Yes,” I whispered, “Yes, you did.”

“I’m so sorry. Spencer, Hotch is looking for you,” she rushed, turning to the beet-red boy at my side. “Okay, that’s it. Take your time, because I’m cool and not at all mortified.” She was basically already gone before she'd even finished talking, taking off in the direction she'd come from while downing the drink in her hand.

With a loose, clumsy wave I shouted back, “Bye, Penelope.”

“Mortified is a good word. An accurate word,” Spencer huffed as he wiped a hand over his face. His bashfulness, while cute, was not as exciting as the pre-Penelope behavior.  

Running my hands underneath his blazer and up his back, I pressed my chest against his. “Gosh, Dr. Reid. You need to be more appropriate in such a public setting.”

The words, while meant to get him riled up, did more to frustrate me. My drunken mind was more than happy to revert to the metro, and before I knew it, my daydreams were filled with images of Spencer stuffing me into the tiniest closet he could find and having his way with me.

“Oh, I’m the one lacking manners?” Spencer chuckled as he apparently read my very lewd thoughts. He pried my arms off of him and pulled them back to rest at my sides before pressing a strangely chaste kiss on my forehead. “Go get your stuff. I’m going to go talk to Hotch and I’ll meet you by the door.”

Before he disappeared around the corner, he shot me one last warning glance and ordered, “Do not mingle!”

“Don’t worry, I will!” I yelled back.

Once he was gone, it was my job to figure out how to make my body work again. Luckily, it wasn’t the first time I’d had too much to drink in a room filled with drunk adults. Granted, they usually weren’t all cops, but, whatever.

Turns out, it somehow made it easier. I managed to grab my things off the counter without alerting anyone except Penelope, who quickly turned back around with a blush. She probably figured I was gonna go blow him in the bathroom or something. I’d have been offended if the thought hadn’t literally just crossed my mind. I made it all the way to the door before I heard it. Back through the halls, a few of the group had separated to talk about how much harder it had been to see Hotch and JJ. It was nothing, just a little bug spreading through daycares like wildfire. That wasn’t what upset me, though.

No, the thoughts running through my head were more than just a passing thought of kids sick with a cold. I looked up at the walls of the entryway to Rossi’s home and saw intricate moulding and nothingness. I saw the exquisite, pristine rug underneath my feet, and I thought about how lonely it felt.

I was standing in a house that should have felt happy, filled with friends and family and love. There was no doubt that everyone who was there wanted to be there, and probably had nowhere else they’d rather be. But the tall ceilings and thousands of square feet felt so goddamn empty.

It isn’t the building, I heard a tiny, terrified voice call out from inside my own conscience.

It’s you. You’re empty.

I had to leave. I had to get out of the house. I had to hear the silence so that the nothingness would feel more appropriate and less noticeable. I couldn’t let them see me, because if they saw me, they would know. They would know that I was nothing but a husk of the girl they used to know. Without even thinking, I threw the door open, stumbling forward and almost falling flat on my face as I misjudged the small step down to the patio.

“Fuck!” I muttered, the world rocking around me with a stubborn persistence. If it weren’t for the frankly freezing temperature, I was sure I would have been sick. To make matters worse, there was a person quickly approaching.  

“Hey, are you and Spence leaving already?”

It was JJ. Thank god, it was JJ. Probably the only person who wouldn’t make fun of me for being a mess on Rossi’s steps after only a few shots of whatever Morgan was drinking.

“Oh. Hey, JJ. Yeah. He’s…” I turned to my side, half expecting Spencer to be there to answer for me. But he wasn’t, so I ended up just pointing to the closed door before slurring, “he’s doing a thing.”

She was, per usual, very kind when faced with my buffoonery, and just laughed as she shook her head. “A thing. Sounds like him.”

I honestly thought that would be the end of it. It was a good, easy segue into a farewell. She already knew we were leaving, and she knew Spencer well enough to know that he wouldn’t leave me alone for long.

And I think she almost did leave. She almost walked right past me and into the warmth and comfort of a home filled with family and friends. But she didn’t. She stopped and asked me the one question I was really hoping she wouldn’t.

“Are you alright?”

I didn’t want her to ask because I knew that I wouldn’t be able to lie to her. Even if I could have managed it, she would have seen right through me in a second. Not only would it have been an exercise in futility, but she would also know that I thought it was worth it to try to lie.

So, I was honest… quite possibly too honest.

“No, not really. But it’s a lot and I’m kind of drunk, so…”

The mom eyes appeared so quickly, with JJ’s body turning entirely away from the door and over to me. “Not usually a good combination, but an understandable one,” she softly replied, wrapping her arms around herself to make up for the fact that she was sacrificing her comfort in many different ways to talk to me, instead.  

She was probably just being nice— staying with me until Spencer could come take over the babysitting of the drunk twenty year old, but I wasn’t exactly thinking critically at the time. Which is only part of the reason why I blurted out the only thing on my mind; the thing that had been haunting me for longer than I wanted to admit even to myself, much less another person.

“Has Spencer ever talked to you about kids?”

The air, still freezing, also fell uncomfortably silent.

“Oh…” she mumbled under her breath, clearly unsure of how to handle that particular minefield of a topic. Especially with her best friend’s girlfriend, who also happened to be drunk. I almost told her to forget about it, but then she looked up at me with a powerful resolve. “Yeah, he has. Why?”

I thought about my next words more carefully, although you wouldn’t have been able to tell considering how much I stuttered.

“Do you think… Do you think he’d be happy if… I can’t have them?” I asked, wringing my hands together over my stomach. “Like, not just happy today, but like ten years from now?” I could hear how desperate I sounded, but I needed someone to hear the words playing on loop in my mind. Absolutely frantic and with tears pooling in my eyes, I asked, “Do you think he’d still love me if I can’t give him kids?”

“(Y/n), slow down. It’s okay!” JJ urged, lunging forward to cup my cheeks and gently wipe away any stray tears. “Don’t cry! You’ll ruin your make up and it looks like you spent a lot of time on it.”

I had to laugh because not only was it my exact brand of humor, she said it with such a serious face that I had to wonder if it was genuinely her biggest concern. Of course, I knew it wasn’t. In her usual JJ way, she just knew the easiest way to cheer me up was with a laugh.

“Yeah, there’s like $80 on my face, it’s really not worth it to cry,” I agreed, sniffling softly when she finally pulled away her hands. At least I could blame that part on the cold.

“Exactly. And if you cry, then I’ll cry, and then I’ll also ruin my make up, and we’ll just be $150 down the drain with nothing to show for it,” she joked with a tired roll of her eyes and a shrug.  

Together, we laughed, finding a pocket of warmth in a world that often felt too cold. Behind JJ’s eyes though, I saw an empathy I wasn’t expecting. That small, instinctual part of my brain tugged at my heart, telling me that there was an unspoken bond forming. For the first time in a long time, I didn’t know why. I had a feeling that it was one of those secrets you just didn’t ask about, so I let it go.

“Thanks. It’s a stupid thought anyway,” I sighed, shuffling my feet and knocking my heels against the somehow spotless patio. “I don’t know what’s going to happen, so why stress about it, right?”

But then JJ said something I wasn’t expecting. Something that I actually really, really needed to hear.  

“I don’t know, I think you’re allowed to be worried. It’s normal to feel scared.”

The sentence hit me like a freight train carrying lead and cement. At first, my brain refused to comprehend it at all. I struggled to repeat the idea, not because I was drunk but because it sounded so wrong. I had wanted it to be true so badly, and here she was, telling me it was okay.

Sensing my simultaneous trepidation and revelation, JJ cringed a bit when she said, “But I think it is a good idea to talk to Spence about it instead of me. Because, to be honest, I’ve also had one too many glasses to be helpful.”

That time when I laughed, it was full-hearted and involved every muscle in my body. “God, I love you, Jennifer,” I said through the noise.

She just shook her head, clearly enjoying the drastic mood swing she’d had a great part in. “I love you, too,” she whispered, running her hand over my shoulder and arm to pull me into a small half-hug. And that was how Spencer found us, giggling and sniffling on Rossi’s porch.

“Hey, are you ready to— Oh! Hey JJ,” he stopped, taking a very hesitant step forward in the hope that we wouldn’t both start crying on the spot. Drunk girls had a tendency to do that. “W-What are you guys doing out here?”

She let me go first, shoving her hand, still damp with my tears, into her pockets with a secretive smile. “Girl talk.”

“That usually doesn’t bode well for me,” Spencer answered with an awkward, nervous laugh. He didn’t make a move to grab me yet, probably too scared to step between the two of us. I was too busy giggling at the thought of his mind cycling through all the possible secrets I might have spilled in my uninhibited state.

I was tipsy, but I wasn’t that drunk.

JJ pulled two fingers over her mouth in a cheeky motion as she whispered, “My lips are sealed.”

“An even worse sign,” Spencer winced, turning to finally wrap his arm around me. He must have noticed the chill on my skin, because seconds later he had me practically wrapped in his coat. “I should just cut my losses and get her out of here, huh?”

“Shut up, old man,” I slurred, cuddling closer to his body heat despite my protests. Even in the darkness, I watched the heat bloom in his face at the nickname. By far, the worst part about the situation was the fact that I couldn’t kiss him, because I just knew he would be so warm, and I was really starting to get cold. I suspect that’s why he started to whisk me away, unceremoniously shushing me as JJ cleared her throat and raised her hand in a wave.  

Before we got too far, though, I heard her speak again. “Oh! (Y/n), your questions!”

“What about them?” I asked, glancing over my shoulder and nearly falling to the ground as a result.

JJ looked at me, and then back to Spencer, whose arm was wrapped possessively around me. She smiled a pure, toothy grin that filled her face, causing that weird feeling in my gut to flare up again. She saw something in that moment that I wasn’t sure I’d ever really understand, but her voice started to crack just enough to notice when she called out, “The answer is yes. To all of them.”

 —————————————————

 The ride back to Spencer’s place was uneventful, though I tried very hard to make it interesting. After the fourth time he'd swatted away my hand and threatened to throw me in the back, I gave in to his demand to behave. I blamed my compliance on the alcohol, although it was probably more so a result of total exhaustion.

The respite from socialization was apparently what I needed to be able to function again, because as soon as we pulled into his apartment parking lot, I was awake.

... Awake enough to try and maul him in the hallway. But, in his sober stubbornness, he continued to evade my advances all the way until his front door clicked shut behind us. His hands on my hips had never felt like such a victory before.

“Did you enjoy wreaking havoc all night?” he whispered, slowly leading us towards his room. I couldn’t see where I was going, but I didn’t need to. Even without an eidetic memory, my body cherished this path and the memories it always led to. I trusted him to catch me if I stumbled. Which, I definitely did.

“I’m the cutest devil you’ll ever see,” I slurred.

“At least you admit it,” Spencer laughed. I couldn’t tell if it was at my words or the fact that I was failing terribly at trying to unbutton his shirt. My drunk self was not a skilled multitasker.

Once I felt the bed against the back of my thighs, I hopped on top of the covers before he could even try to help me up. It was muscle memory. We’d been there before.

“I’m feeling more fallen angel tonight,” I sighed, sliding against the comforter until I found his pillow.

Naturally, Spencer saw the way I gravitated to his side. He smiled as he removed his shirt that I’d left mostly intact. “By all means, feel free to stay that way.”

I probably should have taken off my dress, or my shoes, but I didn’t. The world sort of felt like a wave pool on a sunny day, and I was worried that if I paid too much attention to what was going on around me, I'd think about something I really didn’t want to think about.

I couldn’t remember what it was.

But then Spencer’s hands were gliding up and down my calves, and I shuddered at the contact. He took his time removing my shoes before coming up to join me on all fours. I wondered if he could taste the whiskey on my tongue when he kissed me. Did it remind him of the circumstances that had brought us together? Did it remind him of his hangover and sins?

Did he think of monsters when he kissed me?

My hands were tangled in his hair, pulling lightly to try to keep him there. And when he pulled away, I tried to fight him. I tried to follow him, scared that once the kiss was over, I’d start remembering things I probably should have tried to forget.

He must have seen the denial in my eyes, because he hesitated. His hand came up to lightly grab my wrist and lead my hand that had a death grip on his hair down to his face. “Are you too drunk? Should we stop?”

Throwing my head back with a groan, I tried not to hate him for actually caring about me again. “If you stop right now, I’m going to actually scream,” I droned. It got me a laugh, at least.

“That doesn’t comfort me in the slightest.”

Once I opened my eyes, I found myself wishing I hadn’t. It wasn’t that I saw hesitancy or fear in Spencer’s eyes – on the contrary, it was the lack of anything bad at all that bothered me. I looked into his eyes and saw nothing but a sincere, pure adoration that I couldn’t argue with.

I chose to ignore it, instead. I couldn’t remember why it made my stomach hurt.

“Are you going to make me do a sobriety test?” I giggled, letting my hands travel down his shoulders and chest. I wasn’t in as much of a rush as I had been earlier. I wanted to take my time remembering what it felt like to be pinned under him and surrounded by his embrace.

“I’m positive that you’ve practiced those while drunk,” he playfully replied while trying to hide the way goosebumps followed my fingers as they trailed down to more interesting territory.  

“Yeah, I can say the alphabet backwards and everything.”

It was meant as a joke, but Spencer apparently had some doubts. With a scrunched up smile, he laughed back as he asked, “Really?”

The fact that he believed I was capable of something like that might have been flattering if it hadn't been based on his incredibly flawed perception of my propensity to lawbreaking. But since it was based on ideas of immorality rather than intelligence, it just made me mad.

Smacking him lightly on the chest, I both pouted and laughed as I snapped back, “No, of course not, asshole!”

Spencer just grinned, giving a delayed wince at the offensive contact before he sat up again. I didn’t realize why at first, but as he slowly started to coax me into turning around, I remembered that I was, in fact, still fully dressed. I figured it was either his way of saying that I’d won, or just an excuse to take off the dress so I might actually go to sleep. I was fine with either.

“I was drunk the first night we met, if you’ve forgotten,” I mumbled, rolling onto my side of the bed and moving my hair so that he wouldn’t catch any in the zipper.

“I definitely haven’t forgotten that night.”

The nostalgia in his voice was both comforting and painful. We’d always joked about that night, though. It wasn’t an insult at all.

“No? Do you think about it often?” I replied playfully, forcing myself not to think too hard about whether he wished I was still the girl he'd met that day.

Spencer made it easy to forget, with his hand starting to draw the zipper down while he leaned forward to whisper in my ear, “I think about it all the time.” My breath hitched in my throat at the way his voice warped into a rough, raspy tone. “You almost made me believe that you were just some shy, innocent little girl.”

This time when he got me to turn back over, there was nothing gentle about it. His hands were clearly craving the kind of violence they got to use last time. I wanted to feel them again.

“We can make a new memory if you want,” I panted, looking up at him with wanton eyes and my dress loose enough to expose parts of my breasts to him.

“Fuck,” he muttered at the sight below him. He pressed his erection against my hip as he ran a hand over my cheek. “Tell me the rules.”

“I tell you to stop if I need to,” I carefully enunciated.

“Good girl,” he moaned, starting to rock against me. Struggling to pull my dress off himself, he pleaded in a slightly pitiful manner, “Can I…?”

I helped him, desperate to feel his skin against mine. I didn’t even think about what it meant for my dress to be gone. It wasn’t until Spencer’s mouth dropped to my chest so enthusiastically that I realized that he’d failed to stop and kiss my lips first.

With both hands on my breasts, he lavished each pebbled peak with his fingers and tongue. He hadn’t ever mentioned the fact that he’d missed me shirtless, but it was painfully obvious in the way his lips trailed along my body. It was obvious in the rumbling of his moans against my skin and the way his hands roughly kneaded the soft tissue.

I was forced to remember why I hadn’t let him see me topless.

I felt naked. Not because of the exposed skin, but because I couldn’t warp reality with lace or cotton anymore. My marred stomach might not have made a physical barrier, but it still made him feel so far away. It was a paralyzing kind of realization, and I felt myself retreat so quickly that it hurt.

Thankfully, it was Spencer who was kissing me. If it had been anyone else, I think I would have just laid there, terrified and small and alone. But I couldn’t do that with him.

“Spencer?” I quietly called, and he immediately stopped, his eyes meeting mine with all the attention a girl could ever ask for. I smiled, and the sensation almost felt foreign.

“Come kiss me here instead,” I said with a little giggle, tapping my lips to bring him back to where I wanted him. And he came to me so quickly, his mouth crashing onto mine in seconds and his hands tangling in my hair.

I had forgotten so quickly how easy it was to get lost in him. Thanks to the alcohol, my mind wasn’t able to stick with any thought for longer than a few seconds. Mixing that with Spencer’s hands and mouth, I was never going to be able to think in more than a few words at a time. And I shouldn’t have needed to, right? It was just sex. We’d done it many times before, and it had never been a disappointment. But there was a nagging feeling in the back of mind — some instinctual warning that told me I was doing something wrong.

I wanted him, so what could be wrong about that? There was nothing painful or unappreciated in the way he lined himself up at my entrance, and I certainly made that much clear. It was hard to even hear him over the sound of my own moans, and my nails dug into his shoulder as I guided him into me with my hips.

“I love you,” I cried, wrapping my legs around his waist and digging my heels into the back of his thighs.

“I love you so much, little girl,” he whispered against my lips, his forehead resting against mine.

For a moment, it was okay. The feeling subsided long enough for me to enjoy the fact that Spencer, the man I loved, loved me back. I thought about how long it had taken us to get to this point, and how I never wanted to lose it again. I held onto him for dear life, rocking my hips to meet his and bringing his mouth down to mine.

It was okay, until he spoke again.

“You’re such a good girl,” he groaned into my mouth, “even when you’re being bad you just want to be useful.”

Useful.

The word had come back to haunt me several times in the recent weeks. I hadn’t said anything about it because I couldn’t understand why it bothered me so much. There was no reason for me to be upset. He was just saying what I usually liked to hear.

So why did it hurt?

And I realized then, that the reason that experience felt so horrible wasn’t because of me at all. It was because it was Spencer. It was Spencer, the man I loved. There he was, trying to love me and comfort me and hold me and I…

In a rush of emotions and memories and repressed regrets, I was forced to face the fact that I had made a terrible mistake. The kind of mistake that if I didn’t do something about it in that exact, immediate moment, would become a disaster. The kind of disaster that meant he might never want to touch me again. The kind that would make him hate me. The kind that would make him leave and I couldn’t blame him for.

I had made a mistake.

“Wait, wait, Spencer, stop!” I slurred, my hands that had been holding him close seconds earlier shoving him off of me with the little force I was capable of. It didn’t take much, though, considering how fast he jumped back.

Frantic and terrified, he grabbed my face and tried to inspect my eyes that were avoiding him. “Are you alright? Did I hurt you?”

I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t look at him. “No, I just really need to stop,” I muttered, my breath picking up even more as I slid away from him, “Can I just— Can you just give me a minute?”

My hands slid over my chest, trying to hide the shame I felt inside to no avail. Spencer only made it worse in the way he quickly grabbed clothing, covering me in his shirt before he dressed himself. He even took the time to find me pants and help me in them, quietly and carefully. Like a doll.

I was going to be sick.

“What’s wrong? Talk to me,” he croaked brokenly while he curled up at my side, trying to wrap his arms around me before he realized I was shrinking away from his touch. He was so confused. He had no reason to know what was going on, but I could see on his face that he was desperately trying to figure it out.

“Does this have something to do with what you were talking to JJ about?”

An interesting question. I didn’t know the answer.

“Yes. No? Maybe. I guess?” I ran a hand over my face that landed on my throbbing temple. The lack of tears on my face almost surprised me. I probably should have been crying, but I wasn’t. In a way, it felt like I had no tears left to give. When I turned to him, bile rose in my throat and I was afraid that I might choke on it if I didn’t get the words out faster. I just had to tell him. He needed to know.

“Listen, I lied to you. And I need to say something.”

I had just gotten my breathing under control, just in time for his to go erratic. His pulse was visible in his throat as he swallowed. “Lied to me? About what?”

“I…” The world was rocking, and I couldn’t tell if it was because of the alcohol or my brain trying to comprehend my own self-destructive stupidity. I knew which one I was going to blame, though. “Fuck, I didn’t think I was this drunk.”

“What did you lie to me about?” he repeated, his hands gripping handfuls of the sheet in hopes of stopping the rest of his body from trembling.

“Well, I didn’t lie, I just didn’t tell you.”

It was the most useless clarification, and it did absolutely nothing to appease his concern. The longer the words stayed stuck and muddled in my mouth, the more devastated he seemed. In hindsight, I would realize all the millions of awful reasons his mind must have been feeding him in the absence of the truth.

“Please, whatever it is, just tell me,” Spencer begged with a hesitant, shaky hand coming to rest on top of mine. He wasn’t looking at me anymore. Instead, we both looked down at our hands. It was a mercy and a disservice. I just had to tell him, but I couldn’t convince myself to do it without looking him in the eyes. That didn’t mean I wasn’t grateful that he didn’t look back, though. Because once the words were said, there would be no going back from them.

He was going to hate me.

“I… stopped taking my birth control,” I whispered in a voice that felt so foreign. “Like, a while ago.”

Spencer’s jaw steeled, his eyes widening and shooting up to me with the same speed he used to jump off the bed. Despite my efforts to grab him, to stop him from leaving me, he was five feet away in a matter of seconds.

“What?!” he shouted. It was the loudest I’d ever heard him. Even the echoes felt deafening, and my hands covered my ears with a wince.

“Shit! That was loud!�� I whined in a pathetic attempt to make him feel bad for me. I didn’t deserve it, but I think it worked. Because the next time he spoke, it was at a more manageable volume.

“What do you mean you stopped taking your birth control?! When?!”

“Stop yelling at me.” I pulled my knees to my chest and ignored the pain in my stomach when I did so. It felt well deserved.

“You aren’t joking, either. Why didn’t you tell me this?” Spencer continued, his hands raking through his hair while he started to pace the room.

Nothing about it felt real. I felt like I was stuck in one of my million recurring nightmares. I just wanted to wake up, to be somewhere other than in a room too small for the bass in his voice. I only barely saw him when he finally approached me. He still stayed a few feet away, but he met my eyes that stared vacantly at the wall ahead of me.  

“Answer me!”

Whether it was the order that broke me or the pain in his voice, all of my resolve and apathy shattered at once.

“You’ve always said you wanted to get me pregnant!” I screamed back, digging my nails into my skin in the hope of finding feeling there.

“Not like this! Not right now!” he scoffed. The sound would have hurt more if he hadn't stepped closer to me when he made it.

“Why not?!” I tried to sound angry, but all I heard was the plea beneath the words.

I just want to be useful. Please let me be useful.

“Are you serious?” Spencer’s disbelief was present in every ounce of his existence. His hands were alternating between fists and flat palms, his voice cracking and wavering in pitch. “What has gotten into you? You know that you can’t have a child right now.”

I bit down on my tongue in one final attempt to keep the scary words inside. But he couldn’t feel the way his words felt just like bullets and scar tissue that would never fully heal again.

“You almost died! Do you—“ he choked, but powered through his body’s attempt to stop the thought. “Do you understand the danger that would put you in?”

“I know, alright?! I know!” The words were loud and hoarse, and I covered my own ears to hopefully drown out the sound of failure on my own tongue. “I know I can’t have a fucking kid right now!”

“Then what are you doing?!”

I don’t know. Please, help me.

He waited for my answer, but it stayed trapped in my head. When I started to rock in place, my hands still clamped over my ears and the tears I swore I didn’t have starting to fall, he sighed.  

“Get up, we’re going to the store.”

“Why?” I spat, sinking further into my spot in a purely selfish manner.

“Get up,” he said again, this time reaching out for my hand.

But I didn’t want to touch him. I didn’t want him to touch me like this. I was scared that if I did what he wanted, then the fight would be over. And if the fight ended, then what would be left? Was this all just some elaborate ruse to get me in his car so that he could drive me home and leave me there?

His hand touched mine so softly, with so much patience and love that it burned. Why wasn’t he angrier? He should be.

“No!” I screamed, smacking his hand away from me. Although I knew it didn’t hurt, I saw him wince at the contact. His lips flattened as he looked at the stupid sobbing girl on his bed.  

Then he left. He turned on his heel, and with less patience that time, grumbled the explanation he'd refused to give before. “We’re going to the store and getting levonorgestrel so that you don’t make the stupidest mistake of your life.”

It wasn’t the words that got me to move, but the fact that he was quickly leaving the room. I scrambled after him recklessly, crashing into just about every stationary object in the way. The shock had hit me so hard that I forgot I was still drunk.

“Is it really that awful to imagine having a future with me?” I sobbed, chasing after him just to crash into him when he stopped.

He still caught me, but I couldn’t tell you why.

“You know that’s not what this is about.” He sounded so tired, but he kept going. He kept fighting with me even though I could see in his eyes that it was the last thing he wanted to do. “I love you, (y/n)! But you’re acting like… like a child!”

“Fuck you,” I seethed, pushing myself away from him.

I was scared that if I didn’t force our bodies apart, I would have fallen to pieces in his arms again. And I knew he would try to put me back together again. He would try to help me because that’s what he always did. But sometimes things are just completely, irrevocably broken. Sometimes there was simply no fixing it.

Good luck convincing Spencer of that.

“I don’t need this shit and I don’t need to go to the store,” I muttered under my breath as I made my way back into the bedroom to locate my purse that I’d so gracefully thrown on the floor.

“(Y/n), just because the chances of pregnancy are low doesn’t mean they are nonexistent, and I’m not going to be the reason you throw your life away! You said yourself you aren’t ready to be a housewife!” I heard him rambling from the other room. Eventually, he followed the sounds of plastic packaging and rustling paper.

“Shut up,” I groaned, finally getting the tiny pill free and successfully shoving it in my mouth before I managed to drop it. “Just leave me alone, Spencer.”

Obviously, it wasn’t going to work. After all, I was in his apartment, and currently sitting cross legged in the middle of his bedroom and trying to dry swallow a pill that tasted a lot like every mistake I’d ever made.

“When did you buy that? And why do you have it with you?” He didn’t sound angry at all anymore. He didn’t even particularly sound annoyed or confused, just… exhausted.

“You’re welcome for saving you the drive.”

Of all the things he could have done, he chose the one I expected the least. He came to me, and carefully lowered himself to the ground in front of me. At first, that was all he did. He just sat across from me with puppy dog eyes and an awkward posture.

“Look at me,” he called gently.

“I don’t want to.”

He sighed, waiting another second to catch his breath and let the earlier emotions settle in the air. “You had that in your purse. Why?” he asked as he reached forward to grab the remnants of the torn up box and confirm that it was what he thought it was. Once he was satisfied, he just sounded even more broken. “You’ve clearly thought about it enough to plan ahead, but apparently I wasn’t important enough to have a say in any of these decisions.”

The pain that was forming in my stomach hurt worse than the AR-15.

“Were you just… Just planning on making those decisions without even telling me?” He was on the verge of tears, though he tried his very best to hide it.  It might’ve worked if I'd been both drunk and an idiot, but unfortunately the adrenaline was combatting the alcohol pretty well at that point.

With both hands covering his face, I could still see the way his jaw tensed between the words. “It would be my child, too,” he forced out, “You don’t— You don’t get to make those decisions without me. T-That’s not fair.”

The sounds were so pitiful, and I wanted to feel anything but what I felt. I wanted to feel angry or sad again, but I couldn’t. All I felt was hate; the most powerful, soul crushing self-loathing imaginable.

I didn’t want to be the reason he cried. I wanted it to stop, but I didn’t know how. I couldn’t control myself. I just kept rubbing salt in the wound so he would leave. So that I could hate him for leaving me instead of hating myself for making him.

“There’s no kid. I would’ve taken it either way.”

That succeeded in getting a response.

“Then what was the point of any of this?!” he fumed, dropping his hands to gestured to the state of us, dressed in pajamas and tears. “If you really believe that, then why tell me? Why risk it at all?!”

“I don’t know.”

“I deserve a better answer than that. That’s bullshit and you know it,” he demanded with an accusing finger.

But I didn’t know that it was bullshit. Really, it was the truth. I didn’t know why I was doing this. All I knew was that if I stopped, if I was just honest with him, I would have to face a reality I wasn’t ready for.

“I deserve the truth,” he said as his hand fell, unable to stay up under the weight of the feeling behind it.

I looked at him and I saw my mistakes in the form of tears trickling down his cheeks and a tremble in his lips. I saw a man who deserved nothing but the greatest love, begging me to give him something to work with. He wasn’t asking me for the world — he just wanted me to talk. To say something so that he could understand why I wanted him to hate me.

I didn’t have an answer. Not one that either of us would believe, anyway.

“I don’t know what to tell you, Spencer.” My lips moved without my permission, and my legs quickly followed the traitorous pursuit.

“What does that mean?” he begged me as he followed me. He followed me like he always did, with that suffocating hopefulness that we could make it.

But what if I couldn’t? What if this was it for me? What if, in my desperate desire to push him away, I was saving him from a miserable life with me?

I was trying to save him.

“It means…” I paused, turning to look him in the eyes so that he might finally hear what he needed to in my answer. “It means you should’ve picked a different 20 year old to fuck.”

His jaw finally relaxed, dropping open with a broken breath.

And I think he saw it. I think he saw the way I meant the words from the bottom of my soul. He heard me tell him that he should regret me while I tried to walk away, and he knew that I meant it.

“I’m leaving.” The words surprised me when I heard them in my own voice, but I followed them, nonetheless. I barreled towards the door with bare feet and my keys in my hand.

“Where are you going? You can’t leave like this.” His statements were logical, but that only served to further piss me off.

“You can’t tell me what to do. I’m not your property!”

That wasn’t why I was angry. We both knew that wasn’t why. The real reason, the truth behind the reckless self-destruction was approaching too fast and I couldn’t slow it down. Nothing could stop it from rushing down the predetermined path that we stood on, and I was begging him to get off the tracks.  

“If you leave right now, you’re going to fucking kill yourself!”

And then it happened. Practically foaming at the mouth with the unhinged rage that had been boiling underneath my skin for too long, I finally managed to let the words go.

“Maybe that’s the fucking point!”

Silence had never been so loud. It had never been that heavy.

“Have you ever stopped to consider that, Spencer?” I laughed because there was no reason in my mind not to. It all seemed so terribly obvious and we’d been skirting around it for so long. Why were we pretending like this was news? Like we hadn’t heard the horns and seen the headlights approaching?

“Please stop.” It was said like a plea but meant as an order. But I never listened to directions and he already knew that.

“I’m not your problem just because you were unfortunate enough to fall in love with me,” I continued, finding a freedom in being able to finally say what I’d been thinking all along. “Put me out of my fucking misery, Spencer. Just let me go.”

“Stop!” he shouted, pulling fistfuls of his hair as his chest heaved with deep, rasping breaths. I’d heard that voice from him before, but only once. The memories were locked away in the part of my brain that I swore to leave locked up.

I was back in the bank. I could feel his hands slipping in blood on my stomach and pressing into my cheeks. I was in the ambulance again. His hands were so warm that they burned, but I couldn’t bring myself to ask him to leave. I'd had one foot in the grave then. I felt like I was still there, teetering over the edge with nothing but Spencer’s frantic breathing and desperate begging keeping me from jumping in.

“Stop saying that!” Spencer ordered, his hands letting go just enough to come back down on his head with some force. I jumped at the contact and wondered when I'd started feeling his pain, too.  I wondered when we'd found ourselves back in his apartment again.

“Y-You aren’t going to die!” He continued. It didn’t have the force of an order or the pathetic breaking of a cry. It was just a statement he was trying to will into existence. An attempt to ward off memories that reminded him he was capable of losing me. He had already almost lost me once. In a way, it was this same scenario.

It was just that he wasn’t losing me quickly from a gunshot wound. No, I was bleeding out in an entirely different way.

“You can’t— I can’t lose you. I can’t do it again,” he sobbed, falling to his knees and not caring at all about the bruises that would follow. The sight of him collapsing in on himself was terrifying, and I realized for the first time the true consequences of my actions. I couldn’t pretend that I was trying to save him anymore. I couldn’t listen to the congested, barely comprehensible ramblings of a man begging me not to want to die and act like I was thinking of him at all.

I was being selfish. How very much like me.

“Please, anything but that. You can hate me forever, but please don’t…” The words trailed off, and I felt compelled to answer them. I needed something to release the knot in my chest and allow my lungs to fill again.

“I don’t hate you, Spencer. I could never hate you.” The words were infuriating in their honesty, but he needed to hear them. He needed to know that none of this was his fault, that he’d done nothing wrong other than meet me.

I couldn’t leave him like that. He deserved so much better than me, but that was all that I had. So, I climbed down next to him, reaching out to him and hoping that he would hold me back.

To my surprise, he did. His hands grabbed mine like they were a lifeline, bringing them to his lips wet with tears. And although he was silent, I could hear the way he prayed that they wouldn’t fade away from him again.

“I-I… I don’t know what I’m supposed to tell you. I’m supposed to be the adult here, I’m supposed to know how to fix these things, but I have no idea what I’m doing, (y/n).”

It was an admission Spencer didn’t often make. The complete helplessness and inability to fix the puzzle before him didn’t just hurt because it was painful to watch, it was also just another reminder of his limits.

One time he had promised me that he wouldn’t let anything hurt me. I should have told him that it was a stupid promise to make then. I should have showed him the skeletons in my closet and the mess in my hands.

But it didn’t matter anymore. He had already seen it, and it was too late. I’d made too many mistakes, and I had to face them. I couldn’t run away anymore. That meant listening to Spencer, pouring his heart out to me and clutching my hands like they would turn to nothing in front of him.

“You’re falling apart and you won’t talk to me. I don’t know how to make this stop hurting. I don’t know how to help you. Sometimes you’re so happy but other times I can see it in your eyes…”

Our eyes met, unguarded, for the first time in what felt like hours but was actually probably only a few minutes. We looked into each other’s eyes and tried to read each other’s minds. I didn’t know what he saw, but I heard the way it struck him.

“Do you… Do you want to leave me?” he asked.

And I realized then, that was what my behavior was leading up to. That was what my mind was racing towards, without ever considering whether it was what was best for me. Because I wasn’t thinking about what was best for me, or what I wanted, or what I should want. All I cared about was the same concern Spencer had for me— I didn’t want him to throw his life away just to be with me.

“Is that what you want?” I asked.

Spencer heard something in my question that brought life back to his eyes. I wished that I could hear his thoughts because he always seemed so much farther ahead. Like he could see the immediate future and knew what would follow.

Then again, maybe I was just idealizing him. I had a tendency to do that. He wasn’t a superhero. He was just a man, trying his best in a world that never really let him rest. I certainly didn’t help with that.

“No. No, that’s not what I want at all,” he said, his hands finding the courage to let go of mine and slide up my arms. He cupped my face with such an urgency and relief that it almost felt the same as before I had uttered those terrifying words. “I told you I want to marry you and I wasn’t kidding.”

It only took a few words for any progress and vulnerability to be obliterated. Four words. That’s all it took.

I want to marry you.

A white picket fence is what I’d promised him. I'd painted a vivid image of us with two children that were just like him. A normal, domestic life is what I’d said.

I hadn't known. I'd made a mistake. I had lied.

“Stop fucking saying that!” I wished the fight would leave my body and let my weary muscles rest, but it kept coming back. Sure as the sun rises in the morning, I couldn’t let go of the hatred. It had to go somewhere, and Spencer continued to be the stupid, stubborn man putting himself in front of me without any defenses.

I don’t think he was expecting that, though. He jumped back at the sound, his hands bracing his fall as I flailed to get away from him. I didn’t have the energy or coordination to stand, so I just let myself fall to pieces on the floor in front of him.

“Stop telling me about this future you have planned for us b-because I’m a useless, idiotic fuck up, and it’s freaking me the fuck out!”

Naturally, the only thing that could incense Spencer more than violating his trust was, apparently, talking badly about myself. Because as soon as he heard the words, he was wound up just the same.

“What are you so afraid of?!”

Without thinking about the words, implications, or consequences, I gave him the answer he fought for. I gave it to him because I couldn’t hold it any longer. I gave it to him and hoped that it would grant me the closure he sought, too.

“That I won’t ever be able to give you a baby and you’re going to fucking leave me!”

Spencer, in all his shock and disbelief, could only utter back a single, exasperated, “…What?” The way the word fell out of his mouth almost sounded like a laugh, the side of his lips curling into an almost imperceptible smile.

“I’m scared that when I stop being useful to you, you’re going to leave me like everyone else,” I explained, my voice as small as I felt in that moment.

But Spencer, in his uncanny ability to predict the future, was trying not to smile. Don’t get me wrong — he wasn’t laughing at me, and the words certainly brought him no joy. But there was something else buried beneath the suffering.

“Come here,” he requested with a sad, small grin and a wave of his hand. When he saw the hesitance on my face, he beckoned me closer again with more feeling. “I want to talk to you. Come here.”

So I came. I came as close to him as I could. And as I practically sat in his lap, I remembered how much easier it was to breathe when he held me, and how much lighter the tears felt when he wiped them a way.

“Why do you think I’m going to leave you?” he asked through a chuckle, like the very notion was so unbelievable that it couldn’t be uttered as anything other than a joke.

“Y-You want kids,” I mumbled, looking down at our t-shirts wet with tears. I played with the hem of his to remind myself that we were both still there. And although Spencer sympathized, he didn’t seem too keen on me looking away at that particular moment. With a gentle finger under my chin, he guided my eyes back to his.

“Okay. So do you, right?”

“Well, yeah…” I paused and pursed my lips and bit down on the bottom one. I waited until he raised his eyebrows in a challenge before I explained. “But what if I can’t have any?”

Spencer’s face scrunched up with his shoulders in a dismissive shrug, “There are other ways to have kids. I’m not worried about that at all.”

Just like that, he’d waved away my fears of inadequacy and failure like they were smoke from an already snuffed out candle. He made it so clear so quickly that biology wasn’t the thing that mattered. That it wasn’t my genetics or physical traits that made him want to share a literal life with me.

Spencer didn’t need me to have his children; he just wanted me to raise some with him.

“Why are you worried about that? Did something happen?” he pressed forward, unsatisfied with the idea that I might still be carrying some heaviness without his assistance.

“The doctor told me that I might not ever be able to have my own kids and I just...”

I should have known better than to doubt the insistence of his greedy hands. They would never let a burden belong solely to me. And I… didn’t want to bear the weight alone anymore, either. The dam was broken, and my heart came rushing out into his waiting arms.

“I’m so tired of it, Spencer. I’m tired of this stupid shit stealing my life away from me. You’ve been taking care of me for months, a-and the way you look at me sometimes-- I can see it on your face. I can feel the way it hurts you just to look at me.”

That hurt flashed in his eyes right then but faded with a swiftness I hadn’t seen in a long time. He didn’t want me to see it yet. One fight at a time, I heard him think. When this shifted load balanced between us again, we could figure the rest out.

First, we had to settle this. It had to end.

“If I can’t give you children, and I can’t... I can’t make you happy then—“

“Stop,” he demanded, his finger coming up to cover my lips. There was no argument to be made at his protest. With a deathly seriousness veiled with bowed brows and a lip that still trembled, Spencer whispered to me, “You can feel however you want to, but you don’t get to decide how I feel.”

Tears welled in both of our eyes, threatening to fall with the other. But they didn’t, they stayed pooled at our lashes and drowned us in visions of haloed lights and blurry reflections.

“I am so happy with you. No matter what. Every second of every day. Do you understand me?”

The only answer I had the strength to give was my surrender. Collapsing forward into his arms, I buried my face into his shoulder. I reveled in the warmth of his chest and the strength of his hands on my back. I felt his heartbeat against my cheek as the deep, joyful breaths he took in came out as relieved laughter.

“I love you, (y/n).”

He must have heard, or at least felt, my soft groan in response, because he peeled me off of him with a smirk. “What’s wrong now?” he asked in an equally tired whine.

“You only use my name when you’re angry or sad,” I grumbled through a pout. It only felt a little silly, to joke about something so stupid minutes after screaming our hearts at each other. We were just so tired, and the finish line was in sight. We just wanted to cross it together, and preferably with less tears involved.

Spencer didn’t say any of that, but I felt it, nonetheless. It was clear in the way he pushed my hair from my face before running his fingers down my jaw. “I use your name when I’m worried,” he corrected. “And you scared me tonight. I’m sorry that you’ve been feeling this way.”

We were toeing the line back into heavy emotions, and I shook my head to ask him not to take me back there tonight. But I couldn’t blame him at the same time. He’d so gracefully handled all of my fears and rage; he deserved a chance to voice his own. They’d fallen so far behind in the race towards the truth.

“I understand you were scared to tell me, but...” he stopped, trying to find a way to explain it without hurting my feelings. He really was too nice to me.

“I know. It was stupid. I feel terrible,” I finished for him. Once my face hit his shoulder again, I closed my eyes. “I’m sorry, Spencer,” I said with almost all of the energy I had left. He stroked soothing patterns over my back, and after a moment I realized that we’d started to rock. I wasn’t sure if it was for his benefit or mine.

“I appreciate your apology, but please promise me that you’ll talk to someone about this,” he humbly requested, his words muffled in my hair.

“Isn’t that what I’m doing right now?”

It was almost a joke. Spencer wasn’t going to let it go, though. “Don’t try to be clever with me, little girl. I need you to talk to someone who knows how to help you,” he playfully scolded.

Through a yawn and a chuckle, I pressed on in my attempt to end the night on a horrible joke. “Isn’t that your whole job?”

“Yeah, I guess it is sometimes, huh?” he agreed halfheartedly. Really, he was only trying to give me a little bit of a win. We both knew his job wasn’t very good at helping people before the fact. It was just another poor attempt at avoiding healing. I had been holding on to that anger so tightly that there wasn’t room for us in the space that was left.

“But I think you also know I can’t be that person for you,” Spencer eloquently said, cradling my head as it started to rock with each motion.

“Yeah, I know,” I sighed, “I promise.”

I’m not sure how long we stayed like that, but no matter what, it wouldn’t have lasted long enough. The rhythm of his heart evened out over time, settling into the lullaby I needed to finally find some rest. But realistically, we couldn’t sleep there. Spencer was kind enough to practically carry me back into the bed we had shared when this all started, although this time he laid beside me.

From there, he helped tuck me in and pressed a chaste kiss to my forehead. My eyes were closed, but the smile that spread over my cheeks was enough of a signal that I was still awake.

“Look at me,” he whispered.

My bloodshot eyes opened at his call, and I found love staring back at me. I knew he could see my eyes bouncing back and forth as I tried to see all of it at once in his eyes, and I didn’t care. Even when he kissed me, neither of us closed them.

“We don’t have to worry about anything,” he said as our mouths broke apart. His thumb swept over my cheeks to all the places I knew he was thinking about kissing. There was a very poor attempt to hide his smile at the thought of the future, but I appreciated the effort he put in.

“When you’re ready to try to have kids, I’ll be right there with you,” he said.

It was clear that Spencer really wanted it to be a meaningful sentiment, but I was still a little bitter at his failure to laugh at my previous terrible jokes. So when I saw the opportunity, I took it swiftly and with no regrets.

“I sure hope so, or else I don’t think it’ll work,” I muttered through the side of my mouth before turning onto my back.  

Spencer’s first carefree giggle of the night was my prize, and I couldn’t have loved it any more. “That’s my little girl,” he cooed, curling up against my side and wrapping a possessive arm over my chest.

Just before my eyes fluttered shut, I saw movement below my face. I kept them open long enough to see his pinky presented to me and a knowing look in his eyes. “Everything will be alright as long as we have each other,” Spencer offered.

And despite our bad history with promises, I had no reasons left to doubt that one. 

—————————————————

| Part 21 |

[writefasttalkevenfaster]

Aaron Hotchner / Alaska

Summary: The Alaska episode where Hotch looks v cute in his jacket and you find out that he is very much worth it to you -- despite the complications

Word count: 1,927

Warnings: None, Fluff, Garcia being the best friend everyone needs in their life. 

A/N: Here is a little short thing while i work on longer and more complicated things *glances at pile of WIPs* 

“Are you cold?” Hotch glances up from his paperwork, and you stand holding two mugs in hand, steam rolling off each one, “I managed to sweet talk the inn owner into letting me make some hot chocolate. But I thought you might prefer a black coffee.” 

Even in the safety of the inn, the cold Alaskan air permeated every corner and crevice, clinging to the air as if it too sought refuge from cold winter. 

“How’d you know?” he says, as you settle beside him on the couch, pouring over the files on the residents in this small town. The dim lights of the inn didn’t do much good, so a collapsible lantern sat at the edge of the coffee table, casting the room in an eerie glow. But you weren’t scared — not of ghosts and monsters, but maybe something else — you glance at Hotch,  warmth settling over your cheeks — something far scarier. 

“You aren’t that mysterious, Hotchner,” you lean against your elbow, pressed against your thigh, “not as much as you want to be.” 

“Glad to hear I haven’t escaped your notice,” he chuckles, you can nearly feel it, your thigh brushing his as you hope he doesn’t notice you biting your lip. And he shifts, draping the blanket that was over his lap onto yours, “you must be cold too.” 

“How did you know?” and he gifts you a rare smile, warmer than any hot chocolate or blanket. 

“Let’s just say you haven’t escaped my notice either,” his voice is as dark and rich as the coffee he sips at and your heart thumps against your ribcage, but he sighs, laying back against the sofa, placing the mug down on the table. He runs his fingers across his brow, pinching the bridge of his nose, before throwing his arm over the top of the couch, “but this unsub really has.” 

Work. Always work. 

“I think we both could use some sleep,” you lean back too, his arm brushing your shoulders. It’s a game of chicken — if he will move away or if you will. But you are much too comfortable, his presence much too comforting for your own good. But you wait for it — you wait for him to move away, to pull away. But he doesn’t. You turn your head to face him, only to find him looking at you too. 

“And that’s why we got up two minutes ago and went to bed right?” his voice is nearly raspy, dulcet tones sending shivers down your spine, as he relaxes beside you, his brown eyes utterly sleepy.

“Right,” you hum, your eyes flickering over his outfit, lingering on the brown jacket he wore, snug, his polo barely peeking through, “Did I mention you look really cute in this jacket?” 

He raises a brow, “I look cute?” 

You hum, a heat climbs your cheeks, “Don’t be so surprised, even you can look cute, Hotch, and you do,” this time he meets your gaze, amusement dancing in the low light of the lantern. 

“How cute?” he asks, and you swear he’s daring closer, your knees now touching. 

“Very cute,” you breath back, looking from his eyes to his lips and back, heart in your throat — he’s pulling you into his orbit and all you can think about is him, his lips are an inch from yours, “Hotch—” 

You hear screams come from outside, and your heads snap up. Its unspoken, both of you draw your guns, covering each other’s back as you sprint towards the screams, realizing the source — Garcia. 

All of you are too late, as the entire team and locals make their way out, Morgan pulling Garcia away from the body, already turning cold, the last of his warmth dissipating in the freezing Alaska night. 

And you glance at Hotch. 

Yet again. 

~~~

“I can’t sleep with Morgan tonight,” Garcia says when she bursts into your room, “and no jokes.” 

“Penelope—” you start, and she shakes her head. 

“I don’t need another lecture. I don’t need another person telling me it’s not my fault. That I couldn’t have done anything,” Penelope paces back and forth, waving her hands, “Right now, what I need is a distraction. I need something.” 

You furrow your brow, crossing your arms, “Well, I think me and Hotch almost kissed,” and she freezes, “will that do?” 

“Yeah that’ll do,” Penelope stares at you, sitting on the bed, “don’t just stand there. I need details. What, where, when, and how. No detail is too mundane.” 

You bite back a laugh, shaking your head, “Nothing! We were just talking and sitting on the couch together outside, and I told him he looks cute in that jacket—” 

“So the dad look really works for you, huh?” you shoot Penelope a look, and she holds up her hands, “do I need to remind you I just had a traumatic experience?” 

“Fine, fine,” you sigh, “anyway, we kind of started to lean in and then we got interrupted by—- well you know.” 

“I do, I do know,” she presses her fist to her mouth, before she gasps, “do you like Hotch?” 

“I don’t know,” you cross your arms, “I think so. I think I kinda always have,” but you groan, scrubbing your hand down your face, “but it’s Hotch. It would be so complicated. Our jobs, our lives, Jack—” 

“Would you be willing to make it work? Is he worth it to you?” 

You bite your lip, “I think he’s worth everything to me,” Penelope squeals, a hot flush climbs your neck, and you groan, sitting beside her, covering your face, “this is why I don’t want to screw this up, Penelope. This is huge. I—” 

There’s a knock at the door, and you both stare at it. Penelope speaks first, “Who is it?” 

“It’s Hotch,” and Penelope elbows you harshly, he says your name, “can I talk to you?” 

Penelope gets up before you can manage, throwing open the door, “Sir, I was just stopping by to say good night. I’ll leave you two alone to talk,” and she smiles broadly behind his back, mouthing, ‘tell him,’ before she shuts the door quietly behind her. He steps into your room, looking utterly misplaced. 

“Subtlety isn’t her strong suit, huh?” he asks, and you shake your head, a small smile on your lips. 

“Not unless you discount her entire personality and wardrobe, then yes,” you clear your throat, impossibly dry, “is there a specific reason you came or?” 

“I wanted to talk about what happened,” he says, arms crossed, “when we almost—” 

“I am familiar with what happened,” a nervous energy thrums between you, and you’re afraid — afraid he’ll reject you, afraid he won’t want you, afraid that he doesn’t feel the same, “it’s okay Hotch, it’s okay if you want to forget that it happened—” 

“Who said I wanted to forget?” he steps closer, a smile pulling at his lips, “If I did, would I be here?” and then his brow wrinkles, “unless that’s what you want—” 

“No, I don’t,” you say all too quickly, another step closer, but that only makes him smile broadly, “Hotch, what about work?” 

“I think we can figure it out,” he’s in front of you now, his hand finding yours, fingers slowly intertwining with yours. 

“What about Jack?” 

“We’ll figure it out too,” his palm finds your cheek, and you can’t help but lean into his touch, nearly melting under his attention. 

“What about—” he says your name, tilting your head upwards, his thumb dragging down your lips. 

“I think you look really cute,” he whispers, and you smile, “I always have thought you’ve looked really cute.” 

“Hotch—” but he steals your words from you, leaning ever closer to you, “I—” 

He’s hesitant, his tongue darting against his lips, an unspoken question attempting to be spoken, as your noses brush, “Can I—” 

And you kiss him. You taste the bitterness of the coffee on his lips, but something utterly addictive too, as your hands wind their way around his neck to deepen the kiss. He melted into the kiss, hot and warm and somehow sweeter than the hot chocolate he could undoubtedly taste on your tongue, slipping into his mouth. His moan reverberates against you, his arm hard against your waist as he pulls you even closer. 

“Aaron,” you breathe, as his lips part from yours, but you can’t pull away, your lips burning a trail down his jaw, his neck, tugging at the collar of this godforsaken jacket that had pulled you into this mess. You need to know more, you want to know more of him — not just him, physically, you want to know his thoughts, his worries, his fears, his dreams — everything. 

There’s a rap at the door, Morgan calls your names, sending you two jumping apart, “There’s been a development in the case. We need you downstairs.” 

“Coming,” Hotch replies, surprisingly even for someone who just was making out. 

“We have a penchant for being interrupted,” and your hands find his with ease. 

“It won’t always be like that,” he promises, his gaze impossibly earnest, and it only makes more affection bloom for him in your chest. 

“It could be fun,” you press a chaste kiss to his lips, your fingers trailing down his chest, “makes the heart grow fonder.” 

“Makes the mind grow weaker,” he sighs, as he presses his forehead against yours, “when we get back, can we go somewhere and talk?” 

You lean back, “Are you asking me out on a date, Hotch?” 

“Badly, but yes,” a small smile on his lips. 

“I would love to,” he smiles again, feeling it against your lips as he kisses you again, “but we should really go.” 

“Yeah,” he presses a kiss to your forehead, “we should.” 

~~~

“We’re not being obvious are we?” you whisper to him, trying to look absorbed in your book, when in reality, you were completely enamored in the way his hand engulfed yours underneath the plane’s table.

“I don’t think so,” he replies, trying to ignore the way your fingers were now drawing patterns against his thigh, and focus on the paperwork in front of him, but in truth he spent the last five minutes reading the same sentence over and over again, “but then again, I am a little distracted.” 

His eyes flicker to yours to see your lips pressed into a thin line, the corners of your lips threatening to pull into a smile. He had to resist the urge to press a kiss to each corner, instead, pressing the end of his pen against his lip, “Well you better get used to it,” your fingers trail a little higher, and he shifts in his seat, “because I’m not going anywhere.” 

“Good,” he smiles at you, “because neither am I.” 

~~~

Morgan glances over his shoulder, “Do you see what’s happening over there?” 

Reid frowns, squinting, “They’re just talking?” 

J.J. shakes her head, “No, Spence, but look at how they are talking,” he glances again, his mouth slightly agape, “there you go.” 

“Who had this week?” Prentiss asks, sighing. 

“I did,” Garcia grins, holding out her hands with a grin, “pay up my pretties.” 

“Why do I think you had something to do with what’s happening over there, mama?” Morgan raises a brow as he pulls the money from his wallet, and Garcia only grins, tucking the money away. 

“I didn’t do a thing,” Garcia replies, glancing at the two of you with a smile, “not a thing.” 

~~~

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[fanartfunart]

Fly Away

Episode 2: The Collector

Ao3 - First

(Féline Sombre & Paon Lilas designs)

Summery: An AU where Adrien never went to in-person school, not getting the cat miraculous, and found the peacock miraculous. -Gabriel Agreste sets out his plan to protect his identity as Hawkmoth. (and try to get some miraculous)

(this is like... twice as long as the first one...whoops)

Adrien felt like a ragdoll. Chloé squeezed him around his shoulders and shook him; squealing the entire time. He just went limp. Resigned to being dragged around from the doorway.

“Hi Chloé. Hi... Sabrina? Er…" Adrien stared at the comically tall stack of luggage, only identifiable as Sabrina by their favored shorts over tights style on the legs behind the luggage. "Is this… a sleepover?” His father barely let them over anymore, how did Chloé convince his father to let them stay overnight?

“Hi,” Sabrina said, muffled from under the piles of luggage.

“It is Adrikins! Your father finally stopped being a stick in the mud for once! I have sooo much for us to do. It simply can not be all done in a measly hour. Sabrina, the guest room is over there, we’ll be sleeping there.” Chloé pointed, and Sabrina grunted in effort before they made their way towards the room. 

“Do you need help, Sabrina?” Adrien asked, watching her fumble with the tower of luggage.

“Oh she’s fine, aren’t you Sabrina?”

“Uhhh, yep! Just fine!” They kicked open the door before Adrien could escape Chloé’s hug to help. She stumbled, and the luggage fell into the room. Sabrina rebalanced themself with the skill of a gymnast, avoiding the fate of the luggage. They looked at the mess and sighed, shoulders sagging.

“See? Now!” Chloé grabbed Adrien’s arm and pulled him towards his own room, “I need to tell you everything about this new hero I met!”

“Oh. Okay?” Chloé had been most of his first-hand information on the superheroes of Paris. Obviously he’d seen the newscasts, and, despite Chloé’s insistence that the “Ladyblog” was unreliable, he followed that too. But Chloé was who he got the details from. He’s been reconsidering some of the stories from Chloé’s hand in causing the last akuma. 

While listening to Chloé embellish her own role in a story he was in, Sabrina eventually returned. She smiled and sat, listening to the last of Chloé’s tale. “After the fight I did get a good look at Paon Lilas. He was kinda cute. Not as cute as you, though, my Adrikins!”

Adrien chuckled and shook his head. “I’m sure he’d look just as cute with a team of people doing his makeup, hair, and wardrobe for him.” 

“Shh, you’re not giving yourself enough credit.” She rolled her eyes, waving a hand dismissively.

"Well, I don't know about him..." Sabrina said cautiously, "When I came in at the end there... Ladybug seemed pretty suspicious of him. Maybe there's something we don't know?"

"He did seem sorta new, but he gave me a real Mr Cuddles! No strings attached like with Hawkmoth. Really, he can't be that bad."

Adrien nodded, "I'm sure he did what he thought was right…"

Sabrina hummed, "Probably..."

Chloé shook her head and waved a hand "Anyway, Sabrina show Adrien our surprise!" 

"Oh! I'll go get it!" They stood up and raced off to collect whatever it was.

-

Sabrina stared up at the stack of suitcases and sighed "This… may take longer than intended."

Plagg zipped out of her purse and propped himself on top of one. "Ugh why go through the effort? Just tell her you broke it when you tripped."

"Chloé is my best friend Plagg, and Adrien is a good friend too. He's been pretty upset since he couldn't go to school. Least I can do is find the gift."

"Blegh, what kid wants to go to school. If I lived in this fancy place I'd be eating camembert all day long!"

Sabrina chuckled and shook her head "You do that anyway. Come on you lazy kitty, at least help me look." They hefted the first suitcase and started carefully looking through it.

Plagg groaned. Then dramatically huffed. Then sighed twice as dramatically and zipped away to find something more interesting. Like cheese, perhaps. 

Sabrina looked up and frowned at the lack of kwami. "Plagg!" She whisper-yelled. Abandoning their task, they ran after their kwami. 

"Oooo, what's this?" Plagg disappeared into a room, and Sabrina followed. He glanced around the room then shrugged, "Boring, next?"

"What's that?" She gestured at the ajar painting. A… door? She stepped over to find a safe.

Plagg hummed. "Okay, interest spiked. Let's see what they're hiding in there."

"Oh I don't think we should. We should get back to finding Adrien's gift-"

Plagg already disappeared into the safe. The door opened and Plagg riffled through the contents, muttering about what was there. Sabrina tilted their head, and Plagg handed her a book. "Pretty mundane if you ask me. I was hoping for a secret food stash, maybe the World's Finest Camembert."

Sabrina shook her head and flipped through a few of the pages. "Miraculous? Why do the Agrestes have this in a safe?" They glanced at the portrait. "Behind a painting…"

"Sabrinaaaaaaa what's taking so long? And fetch my nail kit! My nail chipped!" Chloé called.

"I'll go down and help her-" Adrien responded. Sabrina gasped and closed the safe, and ran back to the guest room…. And they still had the book! Ohnoohno. She scrambled for a place to put it before shoving it under a pile of clothes in Chloé’s suitcase.

Adrien walked in with Chloé trailing behind. "Adrikins it's a surprise, don't you know the meaning of surprise?"

He chuckled "I do but Sabrina, don't you want some help?"

They stared a bit at him, "It might be nice? There's… a lot of suitcases here…"

Adrien gave Chloé a 'See?' look, and picked up a suitcase to look through. "What am I looking for?" 

"It's a surpriseeeee," Chloé huffed.

Adrien smirked, and picked up a shirt, showing it to Chloé "This it?" He picked up a lipstick "This it? Oh what about this?" He picked up a set of earrings, placing them against his ears. Sabrina giggled as he continued, shaking her head.

Chloé groaned and sat on the edge of the bed, looking at her nails with a pout. Sabrina quietly handed her a nail kit from their own purse, earning a smile. 

Adrien found it. He pulled out the DVD and tilted his head "What's this?"

"I uh, convinced the class to do a virtual hello- since you couldn't- uh, I also have something else if you don't like it."

His eyes got shiny, and he rubbed his cheeks, smiling, "Thank you. Really." He pulled Chloé and Sabrina into a hug.

Chloé looked a little startled. She likely was used to having to start the hugs, but softened into the hug.

He pulled back with an awkward giggle, "Sorry, uh, I'll watch this later. Really, thank you."

"Yeah, no trouble at all. Apparently one of the kids is like, all about film making. He kinda took over, actually."

Adrien giggled and nodded, "Well, I'm sure you have other plans too-"

Chloé fluffed her hair, "But of course! I have the whole day planned!"

Adrien gave Sabrina a look, clearly looking for comradery in the exhaustion of Chloé’s day-long itinerary. She smiled and shook her head, ready to help Chloé make her plans reality.

-

Chloé had the book. Sabrina stared at it. Why did Chloé have the book? Chloé did not waste a minute to dramatically show off the book.

"Can you believe there's tons of other superheroes that aren't active?" Chloé called, almost immediately summoning the class to surround her and the book. 

Sabrina was going to die of mortification. How were they going to get that back to the Agreste house? Chloé wasn't going to just let her put it back now that it was her newest attention magnet. 

Marinette wasn't late for once. Although, she did feel late. She hopped up and down trying to get a look at what was at the center of the small crowd.

"Is there a horse superhero?" 

"I wonder if Ladybug and Féline Sombre have powers we don't know about."

"Do you know what language that is?"

Tiki gasped. Marinette’s eyes widened as Tiki weaved in and out of the group of teens’ legs. 

Marinette stared anxiously. Tiki returned quickly. “We need to get that book, Marinette!”

“What?” Marinette cried, but thankfully the only weird look she got was from Ms. Bustier.

Ms. Bustier clapped and the group dispersed disjointedly. “Alright class, that’s enough. We do have more to learn about than superheroes.”

Marinette anxiously watched Chloé’s new book the entire class period. The book was mocking her, sitting on the desk like it was innocent.

Marinette eventually got her chance at the end of the school day. Chloé was once again showing off, as Sabrina tugged on her arm, apparently trying to get her to come with her. 

Lila was on her other side, with her head tilted in curiosity. "Where did you get this?" Lila asked.

"It's one of a kind and totally a secret~" She fluffed her hair.

"Come onnn Chloé." Sabrina tugged on her arm again. Hard. Chloé stumbled backwards, and Sabrina caught her, face flushed with embarrassment. "Ohmygosh I'm so sorry!" The book was on the floor. 

Chloé gaped. She pulled herself from Sabrina and walked away without a word. Sabrina immediately followed after, abundant with apologies. 

Marinette dove for the book. And hit her head against Lila's. 

She grinned uneasily at her. "Hi Lila." She tugged on the book, with resistance from Lila.

"Hello Marinette, I've got it don't worry." She tugged back, and Marinette's grip hardened on it.

"I can go to return this to Chloé, they look like they're going my direction anyway. No need for you to go out of your way!" She smiled broadly.

"Oh no, it's fine, I wanted to ask her more about it anyway."

Marinette's smile strained, "Funny, so was I."

Lila yellped. She jumped up and twirled, as if she was stung. Marinette only just barely noticed a red blur return to her purse. She raised a brow. Tiki sure was going to great lengths to make sure Marinette had this book.

Marinette pressed the book against her chest and ran in Chloé’s direction. "I'll tell Chloé you said hi!"

Lila huffed and crossed her arms with a frown, watching the girl run off. 

-

"Chloé could be Hawkmoth!?" Marinette cried, dragging her hands over her face as Master Fu gave her a confused look. "Bah-wha? I need a plan of attack! Paon Lilas did immediately try to protect her so they must be in cahoots. That must be why she torments so many people! She's not waiting for people to have bad days, she's causing them! How do I confront my own classmate? Do I-"

"Marinette! Chloé isn't Hawkmoth." Tiki said, hands on her hips. 

"No?"

"Chloé is a teenage girl, Hawkmoth seems to be an adult man."

Marinette blinked repeatedly. She giggled awkwardly, "Right, right I knew that."

Master Fu shook his head, "But.. Find out where Chloé got the book, and we may find Hawkmoth. I will start translating the book. I am glad you found it, it should be useful."

Marinette gave a firm nod and set out to find Chloé.

-

Adrien stared at the video of Sabrina taking the book and was suddenly very grateful he had thought about cameras when he finally took that brooch…

"Did you know about this?" His father demanded coldly.

He shook his head "No, no. I- didn't know you had that back there!"

"Your friends will not be allowed back here again. Ever."

"What?" Adrien felt like he was sinking, falling, "But father I-"

"They stole the source of my inspiration and betrayed my and your trust. That is not the sort of people I want you associating with. That is all."

Adrien slumped into his chair as Natalie and his father left the room. He stared out the window as a numbness settled into his chest. He didn't know how long he sat there until he noticed Duusu was curled against his chest. A bird flew past outside.

"... Paon Lilas can fly free."

"Huh?" Duusu tilted his head. "Adrien you know what will happen if you transform too often-"

"I just need to get out of this house. Duusu, spread my feathers." Transformed, he leapt out the window and ran. 

-

"Not quite what I expected but the result is the same. Kids, so nosy, taking what does not belong to them. It is time I got my 'book of inspiration' back, and perhaps a few miraculous while I'm at it." Gabriel Agreste picked up the empty book. "Come my Akuma, and evilize me."

The Collector grinned. "Surely they won't mind becoming part of my permanent collection."

Natalie and Adrien’s bodyguard were all too willing for their likeness to be captured, but the bump in the road came with his son. Adrien seemed to have run away. He growled under his breath. But, as long as he was out of the way of the fight, it didn’t matter. He huffed and made his way out to cause as much of a show as possible. Eventually the superheroes would show their faces.

-

“Chloé, I didn’t mean to! But really we should return the book as soon as possible! I don’t want Adrien to get in trouble.” Sabrina pleaded.

“Ugh, but I finally had something that Lila didn’t!”

Sabrina tilted her head “I- Why would that matter?” Chloé just pouted. They sighed, “Can we please return the book now? Uh… Where is it?” 

Chloé looked up. “Oh nooo, you made me drop it!”

“Sabrina Raincomprix and Chloé Bourgeois,” an ominous voice called. Sabrina spun on her heel. It only took them a glance at the akuma to fall into a fighting stance in front of Chloé. “I am the Collector. You stole my book of inspiration, and for that you shall help me build a new one!” The Collector threw his book like a boomerang towards the teens.

Sabrina pushed Chloé onto the ground before it could touch them. Sabrina got up, and taking the opportunity of distraction, ran.

“Sabrina! You- ” Chloé looked around, finding her friend had already left. “….Sabrina?”

“Looks like your friend left you,” The Collector grinned, “She seems to be all around unreliable, hm?”

Chloé took a page out of Sabrina’s book and ran.

“I knewwww I should’ve just put that book back! Now Adrien’s father is akumatized,” Sabrina turned a corner as Plagg zipped out of her purse.

He shrugged, “Eh, not your fault the door was open.” 

They shook their head. “Plagg, claws out!” 

They vaulted up and returned to the spot they’d left Chloé and the Collector, only to find both of them gone. “Sorry Chloé…” She gritted her teeth and began to search for the Collector. 

They found Paon Lilas before they found the Collector. He was sitting on the roof of a building, legs dangling over the edge, eyes distant. Féline Sombre vaulted onto the roof and walked up next to him. “What are you doing up here, tweety bird?”

He chuckled and looked up at them. “Just enjoying the fresh air. Did you and Ladybug reserve this spot?”

“No, but we do have an Akuma to deal with.”

Paon stood up, “Where?”

“No idea, he disappeared before I could catch him. I already know it’s Gabriel Agreste.” 

Paon stumbled. “Are you sure?” 

“Yes, he’s aiming to add to his ‘collection’ whatever that means.” She gives the boy a glance over, frowning, “Can I trust you to help find and keep him busy until Ladybug shows?”

He nodded firmly. “I’ll follow your lead, kitty-cat.”

Féline Sombre blinked a little then nodded, “Okay, you go to the left, see if you can find him. We’ll meet up at the Eiffel if we can’t find him. Otherwise, call me.”

“I can call you?”

They blinked “Er- There’s a phone in both mine and Ladybug’s weapons so I’m sure there’s one in your fan?... Good luck. I’ll avoid crossing your path.” She smiled a little then they vaulted off.

He watched her go, the numbness sinking deeper into his bones. He took a deep breath in and headed to the left, watching for someone who would look like an akumatized version of his own father… He let the tides of emotions lead his way more so than his vision, looking for some sense of an exaggerated version of familiar cold anger or disappointment.

He found his father, and the expected feelings were there, but it didn’t seem to fit in with the severity he’d noticed from the last akuma. He didn’t know what that meant. He glanced at the fan, fumbling for whatever would activate a phone. He blinked as the fan created a pop out screen. He found a contact for Féline Sombre, but no Ladybug. He raised a brow, and shrugged, tapping the contact icon. She picked up quickly. “Féline Sombre, I found him. He’s just outside the Louvre.”

“Okay, try to keep him busy and away from the civilians. I’ll call Ladybug.” They hung up, and Paon Lilas dropped off the roof down towards his father. 

“Looks like someone got trapped in a race car paint booth,” Paon taunted. His father turned around and smiled at him. He did not like that smile. Was it bad that he was unnerved by his father smiling?

“Hello to you too, little peacock. You’ll do lovely in my new collection,” He lifted his book and aimed, “But before I do, allow me to seize your Miraculous for Hawkmoth.” He threw the book at Paon Lilas.

He ducked and the book hit the guardrail causing it to disappear. He blinked and his father showcased the guardrail's place in his book before swiping it away, erasing it from the page.

"Just stand still, pretty feathers like those need to be immortalized!" 

"I'm allergic to paper, actually." Paon Lilas joked. He circled the Collector, getting a sense of his surroundings and how to keep him there. He really didn’t want to hit his father, even if it was an akumatized version of him...

"How unfortunate." The Collector said coolly. He threw the book at him again and Paon leaped out of the way.

"Really, I'm not much of a by-the-books person!" 

The Collector growled and caught his book, glaring at Paon Lilas. “I’m starting to see that. You’re all just troublemaking children.”

Féline Sombre did not seem to have the same reservations as Paon Lilas about hitting his father. She vaulted in and kicked him from behind. “Whoops, cat’s out of the bag.”

-

Marinette was definitely glad for the Ladyblog. Having notifications on for Alya’s obsessive tracking of Akumas and the superheroes movements has certainly allowed her to find the Akumas that didn’t show up right in front of her. She turned down an alley, and double checked for onlookers before transforming. She found Féline Sombre’s message, and listened to their briefing while she set out to the Louvre. 

Féline was already there keeping the Collector at bay. ...And working with: “Paon Lilas?!” 

“Oh! Hello m’lady!” Paon grinned. The book flew at his head and his eyes widened as he leaped into the air to avoid it. “Don’t let the book touch you, it will trap you in its pages!”

“M’lady? I love that!” Féline Sombre giggled, “Can I use that too?”

“But of course, Mittens. I’ve got plenty more where that came from!” 

Ladybug landed next to Féline, giving Paon a glare “Oh hush Feathers.”

Paon Lilas gave her an uneasy grin which was quickly erased as the Collector threw a kick at him while throwing his book towards Ladybug. Féline Sombre moved in front of her, blocking with her staff. The staff disappeared from their hands.

“I think we need some luck right now Ladybug!” Féline said, shifting into a hand-combat pose.

Ladybug nodded, calling “Lucky Charm!” The magic provided a miniature trampoline. She looked around with a frown.

The Collector meanwhile, threw his book at the entrance pyramid. He kicked Féline Sombre into the resulting hole in the ground, jumping down after them.

Ladybug and Paon Lilas immediately leapt after. Ladybug caught Féline, swinging in from her yoyo. Paon tumbled onto the ground, and looked over to the Collector. The Collector grinned, throwing his book towards where Ladybug had hooked her yoyo.

“Ladybug!” Paon called. It only earned him a frown and a sharp spike of suspicion rather than her following his gesture toward the book. She and Féline tumbled onto the ground as the yoyo was sucked into the pages of the book.

The Collector caught his book in the other hand, tapping the page with the yoyo, “My collection really isn’t complete with some superheroes in it, but, I promised Hawkmoth your Miraculous first.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s not much of an option!” Paon Lilas went for a punch, only to get blocked with one hand. He ducked the swipe with the open book.

Ladybug looked around, glancing at Paon Lilas’ fan and the book. “Of course! Bird Brain, I need a friend who likes to play ball!” Ladybug raised her trampoline. 

Paon jumped back away from the Collector and plucked a feather from the fan. He tried to focus on Ladybug’s determination and imbued the feather with power, sending it Ladybug’s way, “Fly away, little amok.” The feather fluttered into the trampoline. “Got a plan? I assume?” 

Ladybug tilted her head at the presence of Paon’s voice sounding much closer than it should be. The mask of light had surrounded his face, and assumedly hers. She nodded. “We’re going to try to see if we can fill up his collection.” 

Paon nodded and a bouncy ball dropped onto the ground, and multiplied on the impact. “Meet Doubounce!” Paon winked and caught one in his hand, “Hey, wanna play ball?” He threw it towards the Collector who caught it with his book, frowning. Ah, yes, that looked like the usual response to that question.

Ladybug rolled her eyes and used the trampoline to rebound the multiplying bouncy ball sentimonster towards the Collector “We need Dou and the Collector a little more contained- Féline?”

“On it! Cataclysm!” They touched the stairwell, causing it to crumble, blocking everyone against the ruin and a wall.

Paon started using his fan like a tennis racket, while Ladybug redirected the senti-bouncy balls towards the Collector. He walked towards her, catching the ones that got too close to him. The Collector pressed the book against Ladybug’s lucky charm trampoline, but it didn’t disappear. 

“What? Full already?” He flipped through the pages and made a move to erase a page, but Féline kicked it out of his hands. They grabbed the book and tore it in half. 

“Miraculous Ladybug!” The swarm of ladybugs returned Ladybug’s yoyo, allowing her to catch and purify the butterfly. Féline Sombre meanwhile, hugged their baton against their cheek. 

Paon Lilas snapped Doubounce out of existence and raced to his father’s side. “Fa- Sir? Are you okay?”

He looked up with confusion, but he didn’t… feel confused. Which only made Paon confused. Gabriel looked at the hero, frowning. “What happened? Where am I?”

“Er, the Louvre. You were akumatized by Hawkmoth.” Paon offered his father a hand up, which he accepted. “Don’t worry, it’s over now.”

“You’re… The new one, on the news.”

“Oh uh, Paon Lilas.” He smiled uneasily, and glanced at Ladybug. Who was suspicious again. What was so suspicious about talking to people?

His father nodded, and then gasped, “Adrien! I must find him.”

“I’m sure he is safe. If he was caught by your book, the miracle cure should’ve returned him to wherever he was last,” Ladybug explained.

“Nothing must happen to him. He’s too precious to me.” Gabriel said, placing his hands on Paon’s shoulders (daringly close to the miraculous clipped to his chest). Paon smiled softly, hearing his miraculous beep, as well as Ladybug’s and Féline Sombre’s.

“I’m sure he’s fine sir!” Féline said, “But we’re about to transform back… Goodbye!” Féline waved and vaulted up to the entryway of the Louvre.

“Paon Lilas. We need to talk.” Ladybug said.

“Oh…” He stepped away from his father and placed a hand over his miraculous protectively. “Er… Get back to you on that, M’lady…. Goodbye!” He ran. 

Ladybug gave a glance towards Gabriel and smiled, “Sorry sir, goodbye!” She zipped up and away.

Gabriel huffed and called up Natalie. “I’m going to need a ride… I have found a few interesting bits of information about this ramshackle team.”

-

Paon Lilas stumbled into his room. "Fall my feathers."

Duusu appeared with a whoop and giggled. "That was awesome!" 

Adrien closed his eyes, standing still as he tried to let the dizziness fade. "Yeah…" He braced a hand against his temple and huffed, "But… Do you know how we can fix the miraculous?"

"Oh no, you're hurt?" Duusu cried.

"I'm fine…" He sighed and sat on his bed, "But it's probably a good idea to fix it if I'm gonna keep using it…"

"It should be in the spell book!" Duusu said, collecting some seeds from a drawer.

"There's a spell book? Where?"

Duusu tilted his head, munching on his snack, considering. "I remember it somewhere!"

Adrien sighed and dropped himself against the bed. "Alright. Guess we gotta find a spell book." He yawned and closed his eyes, quickly succumbing to sleep.

[himbo-kuto]

i saw this screencap from the manga and knew IMMEDIATELY that i would have to write a lil headcanon of aone and his turtle. he is literally the most precious person who deserves the whole entire world.

i hope you enjoy reading it as much as i did writing it!

genre: fluff, wholesomeness, a whole baked bean, college!au pairing: aone x gn!reader word count: 2k warning: language

okay so you ended up being roommates with aone, futakuchi, and mai when you ended up transferring colleges last minute and needed housing

you saw that they had an empty spot and with time not being on your side, you decided to take the opportunity!! apt 205 squad!!

at first you kind of felt left out since they all knew each other from date tech but you soon warmed up to futakuchi since you had a few classes with him and mai because well-- you guys shared a room

HOWEVER!! one person you couldn’t seem to get close to was a man by the name of takanobu aone-- lemme tell u sumn about this Baked Bean

whenever you tried to interact with him, all he would do is 👁 👄 👁  or just Grunt in response

you were a bit discouraged because you thought he didn’t like you so you shied away from talking to him again :(

but futakuchi was quick to ensure you that was just his way of communicating and that he was actually really engaged in the conversation 

“oh yeah, he’s a great listener-- i talk to him for hours and he just sits and listens”

“ok futakuchi-san, but have you considered that you talk Too much for your own good?”

he gave you the finger for that one

but omg the first time aone Spoke to you????? rocked ur mf world-- what the Heck!!

you were in the mood to bake some cookies and were looking for the big mixing bowls but you just remembered that futakuchi used it to try and make a baking soda volcano 

why??? who knows but all you do know is that he put it ALL the way on the top shelf-- and for what????

but u know-- bein dumb as dirt u tried to use a swivel chair to try and reach for them

and of course it was all the way in the back like wtf curse these tall men-- 

and so you got on your tippy toes and right as you were about to reach it, Of Course the chair decided to turn 

and u were 🤏🏼 this close to eating shit but thanks to the one-- the only-- tol angel baby aone, he stopped the chair dead in its tracks just in time for you to regain your balance

“are you okay?”

you were so shook (one from almost breaking your face and two-- AONE JUST SPOKE AND SAVED YOU!!!) 

at first you just stood there blinking down at him with the bowls in your arms like hinata season 4, episode 15 - 15:37

he held up his arms to you and you blushed so hard because was he really about to carry you down????

but before your mind had anytime to roam, he pointed to the bowls and you realized with your real eyes that you were not the one to whom he was referring to 

it wasn’t long until you got over your initial iron wall with aone (…. 😏)  and he actually ended up being someone you hung out with on a regular basis

mai was always out studying for her practicals in the library while futakuchi… well.. who even knows what the heck that man is up to..

but ANYWAYS!! you guys would hang out mostly in the living room to watch TV, do homework and eat meals-- he always helped you with your math homework and you helped him with his architecture models!! 

you didn’t really know what he liked to watch but he didn’t seem to oppose whatever you had on-- however, you Did notice that whenever you put on volleyball he stared very intensely at the TV only stopping when commercials came on

aone Always ate your home cooked meals without fail

literally such a sweet and appreciative boy as opposed to futakuchi who would complain but one time aone gave him That Look™️ and he shut right the fuck up

that day forward futakuchi ate all your meals like a good boy

aone has also become very protective of you-- in high school, he may have locked onto the aces of the other teams, but in college he locked onto his close friends to make sure they were safe

one time you guys got onto a cramped bus to go grocery shopping and all it took was this creepo man to just Look at you the wrong way for aone to stand right in front of you and shoot this man a death glare that said “if you even think about touching her i’ll put you into the ground” 

HE MAY HAVE A HEART OF GOLD BUT DONT MESS WITH THE PEOPLE HE CARES ABOUT OR ELSE IT’S HANDS 

but know this ladies, gents and my non-binary friends, we MOST DEFINITELY sit next to aone on the bus and engage in the best of conversations because tHATS WHAT THIS MAN DESERVES!!!!!!!!! 

not to mention all the times he has saved you due to your clumsiness and overall single brain cell fueled activities 

one fateful day you were sitting in the living room as you saw aone come home with a whole bag of groceries

he didn’t put them into the communal fridge so you were a bit confused as to why he took them straight into his room

you weren’t one to just bust in there to try and find out so later when you guys were eating dinner you asked him what he bought at the store

he listed off a bunch of produce and then said that they were for his turtle!!!!

you were all !!?!?!??? 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 TURTLE?????? WHERE??? HOW LONG HAVE THEY BEEN HERE??? CAN I SEE THEM?

he goes on to tell you that he’s had the turtle ever since they all moved in!! but it never came up in conversation so you never knew until now

him and futakuchi rescued the turtle but when they tried to let them go, they didn’t go anywhere so they kept them!! 

so after dinner you both quickly washed the dishes, and he brought you into their room to show you his turtle

you were honestly a bit nervous going into their room-- like what were you to expect??? was it going to be messy?? stinky?? clean??? were there any secrets????

but to your surprise it was fairly clean and simple-- even futakuchi’s side (which you assumed was aone’s doing)

you looked around his room to find all these old pictures of date tech on the wall, many of them with futakuchi and mai

there was even a photo of all the third years clinging to aone like koalas on a tree and though his expression was faint, you could tell that he was happy

it warmed your heart to see that he got along with his teammates and held these memories close to him-- they accepted him for who he was and that was more than enough for you

he also had plethora of architecture books on his shelves which made you wonder why he picked that major in the first place

but you shrugged it off as you looked over to his desk

there was a table next to it with an enclosure and a cute little turtle sunbathing underneath a lamp inside

you scurried over to the tank, getting down on your knees to get eye level with the animal while you slowly brought your face to the glass  

the turtle was half curled into its shell, looking up at you as he gave you a slow blink

you could’ve sworn you felt your heart explode and melt all at once in that Exact moment

you looked up at aone with 🥺 eyes before looking back to reptile to see them poking their head out to fully greet you 

you squealed internally as you wiggled your finger as your salutations

“do they have a name?” 🥺 

“ichigo-desu...” (strawberry)

you thought your heart exploded before?????????????

oh bitch you felt like you were about to go into full blown cARDIAC ARREST MY G O D!!!!!!

“did futakuchi name them?”

“no i did…”

you literally hunched over, and leaned onto the desk for support as your heart was filled with his soft boy energy because there was no wAY!!! DID AONE JUST NAME THIS TURTLE ICHHHIGOOOO BITCHHH AHHH

but lowkey aone was also being filled with your soft energy and got all blushy-- but thank god you were too occupied by his turtle to notice

“do you want to feed him a strawberry? it’s his dinner time too”

you could not have said yes faster to this man 

he went into his personal fridge and there you saw all the groceries he had earlier that day!! he pulled out a single strawberry before handing it over to you

he walked over to the tank and cautiously pulled out ichigo before placing them on the ground

HOWEVERRRRRR!! what came next you didn’t expect at all

he walked around so that he was behind you, gingerly reached for your hand and guided you to hold the strawberry out for ichigo 

ichigo craned their neck in the sight of the fruit and started chowing down

and by God you hoped that aone could not hear your loud ass heartbeat and see your red ass face-- (you were surprised that ichigo wasn’t going after you since your face might as well have been a strawberry)

you two sat in a comfortable silence as you watched the little reptile enjoy his dinner 

as ichigo drew closer to the leafy bit, you wanted to ask aone if he was allowed to eat that part 

so you turned your head to the side to speak but immediately closed your mouth as aone’s face was only centimeters away from yours 

you thought you were red back then???? bitch buckle up cause we’re reaching a new LEVEL of red

at that moment you were no think, no thought, head EMPTY as you just stared at his profile 

all of his features were strong... the bridge of his nose, his jawline, his expression-- he himself was a strong man and you just wondered how all this soft, fluffy, wholesomeness was packed into this 192cm man

and just as you relaxed into this position

FUTAKUCHI BUSTS THROUGH THE DOOR WITHOUT ANY KIND OF WARNING JUST TALKIN OUT OF HIS ASS 

at first he’s so absorbed into his own conversation that he doesn’t even notice you guys in that position

but when he does??? it’s like those moments in animes where you’re all chibitized and you just have circle eyes and a blank expression o_o

you IMMEDIATELY come to your senses, releasing the rest of the strawberry and aone’s hand

if you could peace fade in this moment, you would’ve definitely flashed futakuchi a duces

but alas, you could not..

so you scrambled to your feet-- but not before thanking aone for letting you meet his turtle-- and RAN out TF of that room heart a BEEATTINN

from that day on, you visited aone and his turtle a lot more-- even going so far as buying things for ichigo!!

“hey aone-san, did ichigo like the squash i cooked?”

“mm.”

“hey aone-san, does ichigo like the new hide?”

“mm.”

“look aone-san! he can’t grip onto the cherry tomato!! it keeps rolling around!”

“mm.”

many of your conversations went along like that and he always appreciated the amount of effort you put into them

he wasn’t a man of many words but did his best to make sure you knew that he was listening and engaged

at one point mai and futakuchi said that “he has spoken more words to you in these past few months than he has with us in 3 years”

you were surprised but also flattered by the fact that aone was comfortable enough to open up and have conversation with you 

although it was a bit of a rough patch in the beginning, you were glad that you became a part of the 205 squad! it was you, aone, futakuchi, mai and ichigo against the world!!

[armysantiny]

Ateez Headcanon; Their s/o is a fantasy nerd.

Pairing: Ot8 x gender neutral reader

Genre: fluff, fantasy (kinda), headcanon

Includes: movies, tv shows, merch, movie nights, playthroughs, gifts,

Word count: 1.9k

Warnings: n/a

Rating: PG

Networks: @kwritersworld​, @kdiarynet​, @kpopscape​, @ultkpopnetwork​, @kpopcontentcreatorsclub​, @k-dinernet​, @lovesick-net​, @whipped-kpop-creators​, @kafenetwork​, @8makes1teamnet​, @ateezlovenet​

Taglist: @teeztheflag​ | Taglist form

An: I had so much fun writing this! Members under the cut!

홍중 (Hongjoong)

Literally so invested

When he sees the sparkle in your eyes as you explain the lore, his heart is doing flips I tell you.

How hadn’t you told him sooner?

Doesn’t say a word while you talk, only going “Mhm~” with stars in his eyes.

If it’s a videogame, or a roleplaying game like D&D, he will practically beg you to give him a crash course in what to do.

“Are you sure you want to learn how to do this Joongie?”

“Mhm! I wanna learn, it looks fun! Just teach me the basics for now~”

Supportive boyfriend right here.

Will look up playthroughs and explanations of the lore in his own time to get a better understanding.

If he knows a little more, than it can be something the both of you enjoy!

If it’s a franchise like LoTR or something similar, he’ll definitely put the movies on when it’s movie night.

Cue Joong asking you about your favourite and least favourite parts about the franchise.

If there are any spin-off titles, he’ll ask if you recommend watching them too.

May end up becoming a fantasy nerd himself.

Makes you little memorabilia whenever he can.

Honestly loves how large your imagination must be for you to be into fantasy.

성화 (Seonghwa)

He kinda just goes “Woah...” at first.

You think he doesn’t like it; he was sitting there more or less speechless.

When he sees your dejected face, Hwa panics.

Because he does like it, he’s just surprised he hadn’t caught on sooner.

Reassures you that he is interested, and pokes at you to continue talking about it.

Cue several cute interested Hwa sounds

Asks if you have any merch you wanna show him.

He hasn’t told you, but he’s started looking into the franchise for himself.

Might not end up being his taste, but he still keeps a small interest in it.

It was something you were interested in after all.

Chuckles to himself when he sees you really into the series.

Something about you excited about the fantasy franchise you were into was endearing.

Always lends an ear to your theories and headcanons

You surprise him-

He swears you’ve just described an entirely new novel to him.

The headcanon is just that detailed.

Definitely encourages you to try creative writing/design courses to see if you could take your interests further

Asks if you want to create your own fantasy series.

Supportive boyfriend #2 over here~

As long as you’re happy, he’s happy.

윤호 (Yunho)

He’s honestly more excited than you are to be honest

Bounces like a child when you describe the lore to him.

If the stars in his eyes could get any brighter, they would. He is literally the pleading eyes emoji

You mention that you’ve created original characters inspired by the franchise, and he almost pounces on you with even more questions.

Will ask if you’ve created a character based off of himself.

Which you have, and when you show him, he gets even more excited - if that’s even possible.

Will ask you to explain the character’s entire backstory.

Falls in love with you even more - if he even can at that point.

Finds every way possible to have you talk about any and everything fantasy related.

Calls you in the middle of the night to listen to you ramble about your latest character design.

Tells all the members that you’ve created a character about him and boasts about it for months.

You might have another fantasy nerd on your hands now.

여상 (Yeosang)

Kind of a fantasy nerd himself.

So, when you reveal that you’re into fantasy, he kinda goes “Oh? Me too!”

Excited giggles from both of you

Cue fantasy themed date nights...you cuties

Curled up in a blanket together with a load of snacks, watching your favourite movies together.

Oh god the theory discussions you two have.

Now you two can call each other at God forbidden times of the night and talk about your favourite series. 

Since he’s the only one who knows, he’s glad only he gets to see that excited grin on your face when you talk about the show.

Low-key starts boasting about it too.

Like, only he can see you when you’re this cute, you know?

You’d take his drones away if he told any of the boys about your fantasy shows, so it becomes your shared little secret~

Buys you cosplay pieces so you can dress up as your favourite character.

Compliments you for days.

Literally so pretty :(

Takes a thousand pictures (Yes, he keeps a set as his background)

He’s already dressed up as Harley Quinn, so he’s more than happy to dress up as one of the major ships.

Especially if it’s your favourite ship too.

Conventions! Omg you’d go to as many conventions as you could together.

Couple goals~

Singing to soundtracks together as you get ready.

Definitely uses it as a way to tease you.

Sees you having a fan moment over a character and pretends to get all pouty.

“Your boyfriend’s right here, but you’re only focusing on them? Fine then...”

Laughs when he sees the blush on your face

Of course, he gets the same treatment from you.

Healthy relationships, we love to see it. Now where do I get this?

산 (San)

Cannot control the absolute look of admiration in his face at all.

Looks at you with all the wonder in the world. His eyes’ sparkle :(

It may sound a little confusing at first to him, but hearing you describe it with so much passion warms his heart.

Asks you to take the plot step-by-step, so he can understand it a little better

Watches some of it when he can, and he can definitely see the appeal

Interesting characters, an entirely different world, no wonder you love it so much.

He has his games, and you already knew about them, so he’s happy he knows about you more, ‘hidden’ interests.

When he heard you ask him not to find it weird after you’re caught having a fan moment, he pouts immediately.

Why would he find it weird that you were a fan of something? He was quite the fanboy himself, after all

Spends a considerable amount of time reassuring you that he doesn’t find your interests or you weird.

No one is feeling insecure about liking a franchise that makes them happy on his watch.

Buys you merch as soon as it releases.

Little excited claps when he sees your reaction.

It soon becomes your favourite merch item and he’s so proud.

Sees you wearing it literally wherever you can

When you invite him to have a movie marathon with you after he finishes his schedule, San swears he’s head over heels because he agrees without hesitation.

No second thought required

Be prepares to have several more marathons while he asks a million questions at once.

Might have to create a PowerPoint for this cutie. 

민기 (Mingi)

Honestly, he’s kinda lost at first

You kinda have to tell him again and he goes “Oh...I get it!”

Does not get it.

A bit like San, a presentation may be needed at some point.

When he kinda gets it, this baby gets really excited, but he’s almost a little sad.

Because you didn’t tell him until now, you know?

Asks you about the entire main cast, and your favourite character.

Finds you watching your show and quietly sits beside you

He wants to try and understand the plot for himself.

Gets so engrossed, his eyes turn into the pleading eye emoji

He’s so cute, I swear-

Honestly, Mingi finds it so cool that you enjoy fantasy.

“Y/n, can we watch it together from now on? I really like it!”

Yeah, you might end up marrying that man right there and then.

Starts asking you to introduce him to other shows you like that you think he might like as well.

Ends up with a full list and starts watching them all.

I mean all of them

Hell, I think you’ll turn him into a fantasy nerd as well.

Borrows one of your merch hoodies and wears it around the house.

It’s his now :(

Please, he looks so small

You end up buying him a matching hoodie

Refuses to take it off unless he has to.

Listens to all of your fan ravings

Learns about all of your favourite ships.

High-key starts analysing them with you

Yep- you’ve got a fantasy nerd on your hands now, enjoy!

우영 (Wooyoung)

Okay, excited child alert

Another one who literally bounces when you tell him. Gives you puppy eyes for days.

Why didn’t you tell him sooner?

Bugs you constantly about the shows you like and your favourite character.

Which leads him to go on an internet deep-dive (Definitely on Twitter)

He enjoys cooking, so he finds a way to cook the food from the show.

And holy shit it tastes better than you imagined.

Once he sees your reaction, Wooyoung makes it his mission to surprise you with dishes from the show.

Late nights binging your favourite shows together is now a must.

Does kinda laugh a little too loud in your ear, but you’re used to it.

In all truth, you appreciate that he wants to watch it with you

He may be watching it with you, but he also loves seeing your reaction to what’s happening on screen

Please, he thinks you’re the cutest human on earth.

Maybe he takes a picture or two. Maybe

Finds really cute keepsakes from the show while he’s on tour and buys them for you

Takes a picture of them and send them to you with the caption, ‘Look what I got~’

You literally squeal and call him immediately

A proud smile on his face when he hears your voice

You’re rambling thank yous in every language you know and Wooyoung’s there on the other line giggling

Yeah, you’re being spoiled with merch from now on.

Precious baby :(

종호 (Jongho)

Probably has the most neutral response out of all the boys

Kinda just goes, “Oh, that’s cool, fantasy’s really interesting.”

Low-key sounds uninterested, but trust me, he is. Even if it’s just a tad.

Jongho strikes me as the type to not tell you that he’s learning about your favourite show.

You’ll be watching an episode and he walks in, “Oh, [character]’s pairing with [character] is really neat. They wrote them really well.”

“Huh..? How do you know..?”

You thought he wasn’t interested in the show and he giggles at your confusion.

Granted, he isn’t into the idea of fantasy as the others are, but if it’s what makes you happy, it wouldn’t hurt to learn a little about it.

Let’s you take him to conventions and helps you hold the bigger items you struggle with so you don’t drop everything.

Thinks you look amazing in full cosplay.

Lets you experiment on him from time to time.

You get him in some makeup, contacts and give him a prosthetic piece to put over his head.

He thinks he looks pretty good. Might consider trying it again sometime.

He’ll be shopping online and see something.

“Isn’t that from y/n’s favourite..?”

Buys it and surprises you the next time you have a date together.

“Oh? When did you get this? I love it”

“Ah, you know~ I was browsing and it reminded me of you.”

Ends up seeing you take it everywhere

Smiles to himself each time and refuses to tell you why.

Out of all the merch you own, you take the one he bought you with you everywhere

He’s touched.

Doesn’t always pay 100% attention when you’re watching tv together, but enough that he’s aware of the plot line, but not the finer details.

You may not have convinced him to be a fan, but you have turned your boyfriend into a casual watcher.

[brain-deadx0]

Virgil's Betrayal

Part 3 of New Big Brother

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Summary: Remy meets Patton’s brother and kids and proceeds to get murdered. 

Warnings: Food mention, play fighting including nerf guns, manipulation but for good stuff, let me know

Remy was not nervous. 

 When dad guy had asked him a few days ago if he would be ok with going to the man’s brother’s house for lunch that weekend, Remy had said, “Sure.” He’d agreed to it. 

 So no. Remy wasn’t nervous. Even as they pulled up to the frankly huge house in a neighborhood of huge houses. 

 Definitely not nervous. 

 Virgil was practically vibrating in his seat. He’d been telling Remy all about his uncle and cousins, and what games they could play together the entire drive. 

 “Everybody ready?” Dad guy asked as he turned the car off. 

 “Yep!” Virgil told him as he quickly unbuckled himself. 

 Dad guy sent one of his questioning looks to Remy via the rear view mirror. Remy ignored it and climbed out of the car to follow Virgil who had already ran for the front door. 

 Dad guy joined them at the door as Virgil rang the bell. Remy wasn’t trying to hide behind them. They just ended up closer to the door. There was the sound of a lock being turned before someone inside the house hollered for them to come in. 

 As soon as they walked through the door there was the sound of footsteps running down the stairs. 

"Virgil! Uncle Patton!” A pair of voices yelled before two young boys were launching themselves off the stairs towards them. Dad guy yelped in alarm as he attempted to… catch them? 

 “Jan, your boys are going to give me a heart attack one of these days!” The man yelled through his subdued laughter from his place on the ground. 

 “And I’ll help them get rid of the body.” The voice from before called. A moment later a short man appeared from what Remy assumed was the kitchen. He looked a lot like dad guy save for the fact he was definitely older than the man. And the mild scarring on the left side of his face. 

 “Alright boys, that’s enough abunculicide.” The man told the kids who were laughing in dad guy’s arms. 

 “Aw…” The pair said before releasing him. 

 Dad guy smiled before standing up and ruffling their hair causing one grin and the other to balk and try to fix it. 

 “You must be Remy.” The man said, “My name’s Janus, it’s nice to finally meet you.” 

 “Nice to meet you, sir.” Remy told him. 

 Mr. Janus smiled, “You can call me Janus.” 

 Yeah that was not happening. 

 “The two terrors who ambushed you all are my sons Roman and Remus.” 

 “I’m Roman.” “And I’m Remus.” The two introduced with matching bows, “And together we’re-!” They spun in opposite directions before striking poses back to back, “-the creativitwins!”

 Remy couldn’t help but laugh slightly at the theatrics as dad guy clapped excitedly, “Oh that was so cute!” Dad guy told them. 

“No it wasn’t!” The pair told him pointedly, “It was cool.” Roman told him. 

 “Yeah!” Remus agreed. 

 “Well whatever it was, I loved it.” Dad guy told them. 

 “Lunch will be ready in about a half hour,” Mr. Janus told them, “So you can all make yourselves at home.” 

 “Can we go outside?” Remus asked. 

 “Yes, but-” before the man could finish both boys took off running. 

 “Come on Virge!” One of them called. 

 The next thing Remy knew he was being grabbed by the hand and pulled towards the back yard, “Come on Remy!” Virgil told him. 

 Guess he was going outside. 

 ~ 

 “-Don’t get too dirty.” Janus finished lamely as all the minors fled to the backyard, “Well I tried.” 

 Patton chuckled, “Probably should’ve started with that part.” 

 “How many sons did you want back alive?” He asked. 

 Patton laughed, “Come on, I’ll help make lunch. 

 ~ 

 Remy watched the younger kids from his seat on the porch steps. Roman suggested playing super hero’s and was met with agreements until he suggested Virgil be the villain. Which apparently happened a lot. 

 “Come on, Virgil.” Roman whined, “We need a bad guy!” 

 “But I always lose when I play the bad guy.” Virgil told them, “Why can’t you be the bad guy and we fight you?” 

 “Because me and Re are the heroes.” Roman said as if it were obvious. 

 “We could be bad guys.” Remus told him, “The bad guys are cooler anyway.” 

 “Noooo.” Roman told him, “We’re the creativitwins! We’re supposed to be the good guys!” 

 “But we’re always the good guys!” Remus replied. 

 “Remy!” Virgil called, “Tell them we wanna be the heroes!” 

 “How about…” 

 ~ 

 Patton jumped when the mostly silent backyard suddenly erupted in gleeful screams. 

 “Welcome to the world of raising multiple children.” Janus told him. 

 Patton smacked his arm lightly before going to peek at the yard. The three younger boys were running around the yard at top speed as Remy made a grab for whoever got closest to him. Patton smiled as Roman yelled for a retreat before all three kids ran for the treehouse. Remy stalked after them, giving the twins enough time to make it to safety, but grabbed Virgil before he could climb high enough. 

 Virgil squealed as he was pulled away from the tree and yelled for help through his laughter. 

 Patton cooed at the sight before reluctantly going back to the kitchen. 

 ~ 

 Virgil laughed wildly even as Remy used him as a partially successful human shield. If he had known there were fully loaded nerf guns, Remy would’ve made it harder for them to get to the treehouse. 

 “Don’t worry Virge!” One of them yelled, “We’ll rescue you!” 

 “Dead or alive!” The other added. 

 Remy laughed, “It’s not a rescue if you kill him!” He told them as they continued to shoot.  

 “Silence feind!” The first one told him before firing more foam bullets at them. 

"Any ideas?” Remy asked Virgil quietly. 

 “I think there’s more guns on the porch?” Virgil whispered back. 

“Perfect.” Remy grinned, “Muwahaha! You can’t defeat me!” He told the pair in the treehouse before running towards the porch with Virgil. 

 Once there he put Virgil down and the kid directed him to where the extra nerf guns were. The ones in the hidden storage bin were much smaller than the ones the twins had. 

 “Virgil! You’re not supposed to help the bad guy!” 

 “Ha ha! I put him under mind control!” Remy told them, “Now I have a minion.” 

 Virgil snickered before rushing to grab a gun of his own.

 “You won’t get away with this, villain!” 

 “Let him go or face our wrath!” 

 “Never!” Remy called back, “Pick up as many bullets as you can, but don’t shoot too much, ok?” He whispered to Virgil, “When they run out we can go after them, cool?”

“Yeah!” Virgil whispered excitedly. 

 It took longer than Remy thought it would for the rain of foam to slow to a stop. “It’s over, heroes. Surrender peacefully and I might spare you.” He told them. 

 He could hear hushed laugher from the treehouse before one of the boys replied, “Okaay~ just a minuute~” 

 “Uh-oh.” Virgil said beside him. 

 “Uh-oh?” 

 He didn’t have to wait long to figure out what the kids were up to because a second later he was being pelted with various balls, ranging from ping pong to tennis. Before he even had a chance to recover, one of the twins was suddenly right next to him and whacking him with a foam sword. 

“What the- hey!” He laughed before trying to fend off the nine-year-old. While he was distracted, the other one had made their way to the ground as well and ambushed him from behind. “Oh shhh-!” He cut himself off as he fell. 

 The second kid had hit the back of his knees with a foam club. This was definitely not a fair fight. 

 While the twins were busy beating him to death he suddenly felt the familiar sensation of foam bullets. 

 “Wha-? Virgil! I thought you were on my side?” He asked incredulously, causing Virgil to laugh, “Betrayed by my own brainwashed minion!” 

The kid just giggled harder, “I was just pretending to be mind controlled!” He told him as he continued to fire the toy gun. 

 The kids screamed in delight as they assaulted him with their various weapons. Remy was ready to admit defeat and call them off when a voice interrupted. 

 “Alright, boys, that’s enough.” Dad guy said. 

‘Oh shit.’

 ~

 Patton’s heart broke a little as the joy on Remy’s face quickly melted away to something much more subdued. He sent him what he hoped was a reassuring smile but it didn’t seem to help any. “Lunch is ready.” He told them. 

 “Okay.” the younger kids chorused before dropping their weapons and racing inside. 

 “Are you alright?” Patton asked, “They might be foam but they can still hurt when the boys get excited.” 

 “I’m fine.” Remy said casually as he stood up and brushed himself off. 

 “Alright then.” He smiled, “Then let’s go eat some pizza bread.”

 ~

 "Pizza bread" as it turned out, was bread with cheese and pepperoni inside. So, more sophisticated than the rolled up pizza slice Remy had pictured. Apparently you were supposed to dip it in some fancy tomato sauce which is why Remy was surprised when Mr. Janus had them all move to the living room to eat. 

 "Dad, can we watch Avatar?" Roman asked. 

 "No, let's watch dirty jobs!" Remus told him. 

 "How about mythbusters?" Roman countered. 

 "Ah, ah," Mr. Janus told them, "what's the rule for guests?" 

 "Virgil," They chorused, "wanna watch-" "Avatar?" "Dirty jobs?"

 "Um… what about Most Extreme...?" Virgil tried. 

 "Yes!" 

 "No!" 

 "Two to one, we win!" Remus cheered. 

 "Boys." Mr. Janus told them, "We have more than one guest, remember?" 

 "Remy, say no!" Roman told him, "Then we pick a different show."  

 "I don't really have an opinion." Remy told him, "What's "Most Extreme"?" 

 "They take all the cool stuff from animals like eyes and teeth and show what it would look like if humans had the same ability." Remus told him, "It's neat!" 

 "Its freaky is what it is." Roman told him. 

 "That's what makes it cool!" 

 "I'm gonna pass on the vote." Remy told them. 

 "He's impartial so we win! The Most Extreme it is!" Remus turned to high five Virgil. 

 Roman seemed a bit miffed at losing the vote, but it wasn't long before he was staring at the screen with as much interest as the other two. And honestly? Remy got it. The show was actually pretty cool. 

 ~ 

 Patton smiled as Remy seemed to settle in again and get pulled into the show. He waited until the episode ended and everyone was done eating before moving to collect the empty plates. Unfortunately, the action quickly caught the attention of the teen. 

 "Don’t worry, I got it." Patton assured as Remy moved to start cleaning up as well. 

 "It's ok," Remy told him, as he paused somewhat hesitantly, "I don't mind." 

 Patton smiled, "I appreciate it, but you don't have to. Janus and I are gonna clean up and then we'll probably be heading home." 

 "Oh," Janus said suddenly, "while I'm thinking about it, we packed up some of our old clothes to donate. You guys can look through them for some play clothes." He told him. 

 "Sure." Patton told him. 

 "I'll be right back to help clean up." Janus said before leaving the room. 

 ~

 Remy wasn't sure why he was suddenly on edge. All he knew was something felt off and he didn't like it. 

 Mr. Janus came back a minute later with three large bags. "Ok," he said as he set them down, "look through and take anything." He told them before pointing to the twins, "No dress up this time." He told them. 

"Why not?" Roman asked. 

 "Because yesterday we had to cut your brother out of a shirt you both knew was too small." 

 "I was a mutant giant what was I supposed to wear?" Remus asked indignantly. 

 Remy bit back a smile. 

 "Preferably something big enough to get yourself out of." Mr. Janus told him. 

 "Boring~" Remus drawled. 

 Mr. Janus shook his head fondly, "No dress up." He told them again before leaving to help dad guy. 

 The second he was gone the twins shared a look before quickly opening the bags and digging through them. 

 Remy laughed slightly, "Didn't he just say "no dress up"?" 

 "He said no dress up for us," Roman corrected, "but nothing about us dressing up you or Virgil." 

 "And so long as he doesn't catch us too quickly we can do it too!" Remus grinned. 

 Remy quickly turned down any attempts to get him to play dress up, and delegated himself to watching as the older boys coerced Virgil into trying on just about every piece of clothing. They had quickly moved on from the kids clothes that Virgil could feasibly fit in, or at least grow into soonish, to going through Mr. Janus’s old clothes just to wear them. 

 Virgil was digging through the bag when he suddenly gasped, "Remy!" He said excitedly before pulling something out of the bag and bouncing over, "Look!" He beamed as he held up an old leather jacket, "It's like from the store!" 

 "Uh, yeah, kinda." Remy admitted. 

 "I don't remember that one." Roman told them, "It doesn't look like Dad or Noni's." 

 "Dad!" Remus called.

 "What happened?" Mr. Janus answered as he came around the corner before huffing a small laugh, "I see you ignored the dress up rule." 

 Remus ignored the last part, "Whose jacket is this?" He asked; pointing to the coat Virgil was holding. 

 Mr. Janus glanced at the jacket Virgil was holding, "That's my old one." He told them, "I haven't worn it since… probably since I was about twenty or so. That's when Noni gave me my other one." 

 "How long ago was that?" Virgil asked. 

 Mr. Janus laughed, "Long enough to know I don't need it, let's stick with that." 

"That's Dad's way of saying he's old." Remus whispered causing Virgil to giggle. 

 "I heard that." Mr. Janus told them with an amused eyebrow raise, causing the kids to laugh. Mr. Janus shook his head, "Anyway, like I said you're welcome to anything in the bags." He said with a glance to Remy, "Try not to smother your cousin in the clothes." He told them offhandedly as he went back to the kitchen. 

 Something was definitely going on. 

 "Try it on!" Virgil told Remy as he practically shoved the jacket at him. 

 "I don't know, kid." Remy told him. This whole thing felt like way too much of a coincidence. He wasn't sure how to feel about it. This had to be a set up, right? 

 "Why not?" Virgil asked. 

 "I already have a coat, remember?" 

 "Yeah but this one doesn't cost money." Virgil told him. Dammit. "And at the store you said these were cool." 

Stop making good points.

 "Oh! It could be part of your villain outfit!" Roman exclaimed, "All super villains need to look cool." 

 "Otherwise they're just regular villains!" Remus added. 

 "What's the difference?" 

"Presentation!" All three told him. 

 Ok, well he definitely ran into something there.

 "Pleeeease, Remy?" Virgil asked with wide eyes. 

... Fucking puppy dog eyes.

 Remy sighed, "Ok, fine." 

 ~

Patton peaked around the corner and smiled. For once he was glad Virgil had learned to weaponize his puppy eyes. 

 ~

 Remy made sure that when dad guy and Mr. Janus came back that he was not wearing the jacket. Just in case. 

 Thankfully neither mentioned it as they packed up the clothes Virgil. Or as they resorted the rest the kids had used for dress up. They all said their goodbyes, with Mr. Janus saying he hoped to see them again soon, and the twins telling Remy they wouldn't be going so easy on him next time. 

 If dad guy seemed extra smiley on the way home, it was none of Remy's business. 

 Remy was not smiling to himself either. 

 …Whatever.

 ~~~~~notes~~~~~

 For anyone who was wondering, Virgil 100% knows what he's doing when it comes to puppy dog eyes. He was raised by Patton Can't-say-no-to-cute Sanders. And yes. He does use this for evil. 

[ggukkiedae]

❝𝕀𝕟 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕊𝕠𝕠𝕡❞

𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚎𝚜:

⇢ Episodes 7-8

𝚛𝚎𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚜:

⇢ conversations written in italics are spoken in english. requests and feedback are highly appreciated!

⇢ script form (name: lines) are the interviews

EPISODE 7

her first cut for the episode is in the kitchen of the upper house where hobi stops by and pats her head

“need help?” “i’m good, oppa. you can go ask jinnie or yoongi oppa if they need help!”

she’s silently moving around the kitchen while getting everything she needs to make tteokbokki and grilled chicken skewers

then she heard them say they were gonna cook fried chicken instead so she looks right into the camera

“maybe i should make rabokki instead?”

she works around hoseok and jungkook while they make the batter and prepares all her stuff starting with marinating her small pieces of chicken

eventually, she’s starting on her rabokki when jungkook comes in to make sauce

“need help, oppa?” “you know that good chicken sauce?” “i got you”

she started dictating stuff out loud for him to follow while simultaneously working on her own dishes

he stands next to her, heating up his saucepan on the spot next to her rabokki. she jumps when he loudly asks for ketchup

“you’re so loud” she laughed and passed the ketchup bottle

“don’t pretend you don’t get louder than this” “true. try this. is it good?” “i’ll try yours if you try mine”

the two maknaes were just trying each other’s food more than they should have at this point

once she put the cheese on her rabokki and covered it, she moved to putting her chicken pieces and chopped up bell peppers onto skewers

when she finished that, she turned off the stove and moved her skewers outside

she watched in amusement while the others panicked over the fried chicken. she was peacefully grilling her skewers

when they went to score the chicken, she called out to them “make sure to check the first two knes you fried, too”

Miya: The oppas… sometimes get a little excitable. Cooking with them is pretty amusing because they usually know what to do, but something happens and makes everyone a little jumpy. It’s actually quite funny. We did it, though. It worked!

cut to when they’re eating and she smiles

she’s sitting across from yoongi struggling to open her can of beer until yoongi opened it for her

“how can you still look like a baby when opening a can of beer?” “the tab hurts my fingers”

her skewers were finished quite quickly, and so was the rabokki

after they joked about an edm version of the in the soop song, she finished the remnants of her beer can and stood up

“does anyone want a cocktail?”

hoseok cheered for her “ooooh makdungie’s gonna make us an adult drink”

she laughed and took three bottles of soju before skipping over to the kitchen

she pulled a large clear bowl from the cabinet and dumped in a lot of ice quickly followed by the soju. she pulled a few scoops of what looked like strawberry ice cream and mixed it into the bowl of soju

she frowned realizing she couldn’t carry it but jungkook walked in

“i’ll carry that, go get us some glasses, mimi”

she grinned at jungkook then took 8 smaller glasses from the cupboards

“a sweet drink to counter all the salt and strong flavors”

she scooped some for everyone, and they did a cheers to it

“ooooh you made this well, aegi” taehyung’s wide eyes made her giggle

“i saw it online!”

by the end of the night, she was on hoseok’s lap and in an endless fit of giggles especially when they were teasing namjoon to make him dance

the next day you they show a clip of her empty bed with the words “makdungie is gone?” on the screen

then you see her sleeping beside jungkook

Miya: The oppas made it a rule to never let me sleep alone after drinking. I don’t really know why? Maybe it’s because I’m a little clingier, or I think it’s an alcohol poisoning thing or in case I get sick. It’s pretty sweet of them, honestly.

she wakes up mumbling nonsense when hoseok cuddles her and jungkook awake

“makdungie, jk” “[incoherable]”

she sits up straight away though and starts rubbing her eyes “hobi oppa?”

and hoseok uwus because cute tiny baby aksjdhf meanwhile jungkook is still knocked out. he cups her cheeks and squishes them

“time to wake up, yoon-ah. i’ll leave the other maknae to you. head to the upper house, alright?”

when hoseok left, she turned to jungkook’s sleeping form and poked him. he groaned, so she just sprawled herself across his stomach, making him grunt

“hobi oppa says we need to wake up and go to the upper house” “right now?” “mhmm”

next cut of them is yoonmi on jungkook’s back while they arrive at the upper house

“maknaes, could you two clean up and set up the table? and bring ten bowls too?” “okay”

once she finished, she walked over to the camper van and slid in next to yoongi. she closed her eyes again, making yoongi sleepily chuckle

you can see her again when they're eating breakfast. her eyes are half-closed, hair going everywhere while eating, so taehyung had to tie her hair into a bun for her

she disappears for a while after breakfast which leads to taehyung asking yoongi where she went

“knowing her, she’s probably with her guitar at the dock”

then the screen cuts to yoonmi actually sitting on the dock with her guitar and laptop out

she’s strumming random melodies until at some point she’s just playing waste it on me

there’s a mini time lapse of her before she decides to get up and go back into her room to nap

the screen shows her cuddling up to her plushies and hiding her entire body under her blanket

by the time it was 7, yoongi comes over to her room to wake her up

“hey, princess. if you don’t wake up now, you won’t be able to sleep later” “hmm” “wanna come sit with me while i work?” “mkay”

she sleepily let yoongi pull her back to the camper van

Yoongi: I’m not sure how, but I know when to check on her. I just thought maybe she’s still asleep, so I needed to wake her up so she can sleep at night. She sleeps in so much on free days, so j have to make sure she keeps as regular as a sleeping time she can get

the last clip you see of her is her hugging yoongi’s arm while they walk

EPISODE 8

she’s sitting across from yoongi with a sleepy smile on her face

“yoon-ah, put your hands up!”

she giggled and did as she was told while vibing with the elder. the screen’s caption read “yoon siblings are having fun”

hours later, she and yoongi are called for dinner

“the steak and pasta are good!” “thanks, makdungie”

they toasted for their last night there and she’s just mumbling off to jungkook about both the song for in the soop and another song she had been working on then yoongi came to let them hear the guide

jungkook then wraps himself around her because she feels cold and yoonmi just sits there unbothered. once she finished her food, both maknaes cuddled up to jin

she sits on the grass between jungkook and taehyung while holding her own firecrackers

“wah, this is really cool” “makdungie, look here”

hoseok was holding out his phone and taking pictures of her. she immediately smiled for him

jimin kept a hold on her when they tried the other types of firecrackers so she wouldn’t get too close

she was cheering when they lit the firecrackers “wah! pretty!”

they’re all gathered in the living room where she found herself in between namjoon and yoongi. you can see her zone out a little during their game

“i’m so confused” she laughed and went along with whatever was happening

the next day she woke up due to her phone ringing

“mm hello?” “...” “a little, yeah” “...” “it’s already 2pm?” “...” “alright” then she hung up

the captions just read “her brother woke her up by accident”

she spent a while staring at her wall while sitting up in bed until her door opens to reveal hoseok

“yoon-ah, time to—oh, you’re up” “good morning” “how long have you been awake?”

hoseok sat next to her which effectively made her lean her head on his shoulder “just now. yoonsungie oppa just called me about seollie”

“head up in a bit, okay?” “i’ll fix my stuff first”

she was quiet for most of lunch then went straight to the trampoline and does a few tricks and flips

“oh, they’re playing with water guns. that looks nice. oh, i should probably take a shower”

taehyung caught sight of her when she was walking off to the boathouse to get her stuff for her shower

“aegi, come give me a hug.”

he ran right for her making her squeal and laugh while running away from him. he eventually caught her in a hug and got her wet. she laughed and hugged him back before going to get ready to leave

Miya: It was nice. I feel like this is the least amount of work any of us had in the past seven years. It was a reminder to sit back and take a break every now and then. To you who is watching this, take a break. Whether it’s by yourself or with friends, take a break. It’ll be good for your body and your mind.

“is it just me, or did the staff suddenly bring in another car?” “i don’t know, mimi. maybe they want us by twos?”

she got into a car with jungkook and hooked her phone up to the aux. they looked at each other for a bit before she played the original version of euphoria, which was their duet they rolled down the windows and sang along

Recording In The Soop:

she sat next to yoongi while they waited for everyone to discuss what they wanted the lyrics to be

they were silently discussing something between themselves

eventually they had her go into the booth to record first

she was in a fit of giggles when they were instructing her “okay okay, i got it, let’s go”

she got it in one go and skipped back to everyone else. she settled herself next to yoongi again and watched the rest of the process

she cringed a little at namjoon’s narration but cheered “RM!”

she laughed when yoongi ran into the booth “oppa, i could have pressed the start for you”

she couldn’t help it and gave all controls to hoseok. she just kept laughing

when it came to the chorus bit, she and yoongi stayed outside to direct

“oppa, are we gonna make them record adlibs after the soop part?” “probably. you wanna try?” “hmm not really”

namjoon did his adlib and she just bursts out laughing because she didn’t expect it

jungkook kept making adlibs so she laughs and pokes him with her foot “oppa, you better record one”

then it was jungkook’s turn. she snorted “this is gonna be something”

then he actually did it and she just falls out of her chair laughing which just made everyone laugh harder while jimin helped her up

but he fell, too, and cue harder laughter

“oh my god, i can’t”

once they finish jungkook’s adlibs she just “can we get jimin oppa and jinnie oppa to record the main line for the soop part?”

the rest of recording was going well with a whole lot more laughter until yoongi checked everything

“jungkook, yoonmi, get in for harmonies”

she follows jungkook inside while everyone leaves

“what do you two want to do?” “i was thinking we’ll do layers to the soop part” “oh, oppa same. you do the main, i’ll do the higher?”

they recorder the layers smoothly and yoongi clapped for them “good work, kids”

[swiftlymoniquesblog]

Crossing Parallel Lines- Sam x Reader: Chapter 13 FINALE

A/N: Hello, I am back! I know it’s been a while but I wanted to deliver the FINAL CHAPTER of this beautiful series! It’s not long but I think it wraps up perfectly. This little series started from one of my favorite episodes of Supernatural and I LOVE writing for Sam and I appreciate all the love this series has gotten. Please, leave all your final thoughts on this one! ENJOY!

Warning: Tiny bit of angst but mostly FLUFF!

Word Count: 1,983 

Series Masterlist| Supernatural Masterlist| Previous chapter

Sam’s POV

Seeing Y/N that small and almost helpless broke my heart. I was scared when she told me she was diagnosed with anxiety but I never expected it to affect her the way it did. She broke down crying and all I could do was just hold her. She said it helped but I could see behind her eyes, she was still rather terrified by what happened herself. Since y/n doesn't have anyone in her own world anymore, maybe this will finally be what keeps her here with me all the time. I know, I know, that’s selfish but you know what? I bet she would rather be with someone who loves her and truly cares about her well-being when she’s trying to get this thing under control than have to figure all this out on her own. She wouldn’t admit to that but I know  her like no one else; she would not want to go through this alone. I hated too, that she thought Dean wouldn’t like her anymore because she all of a sudden had an issue she didn’t know how to control. I can’t imagine what’s going on in her head but that was why I planned our little movie night with her; she needs to know she is safe with us. 

I finally decided I was going to be completely honest with her and suggest she stay with us, permanently. I don’t care if I sound selfish or inconsiderate of her feelings; I want her with me. I grew rather nervous thinking about what I was going to say and how I was going to approach this but I knew it’d be okay because I was talking out of love for her and nothing else. Sure, she made me a bit upset with me, asking her to give up her entire life in another universe, but she did say there isn’t anything that is keeping her there, so why stay? I begin to look around the Bunker to see if I could find her anywhere and low and behold, I find her in one of my hoodies, curled up in a ball, and sleeping, holding onto my pillow. I smile as I watch her stomach rise and fall with each breath she takes, in and out, and completely at peace. I walk to the side of the bed she’s facing and can see her cheeks are red and wet; she must’ve been crying. Why didn’t she come to find me? I told her she can always come to find me when she’s upset! I sigh to myself but run a hand through her hair, pushing back some that had fallen over her eyes, and she stirs, just the slightest bit. My smile widens and I decide instead of fully waking her up, I’ll just crawl into bed behind her. Better than her sleeping with things that remind her of me, right? Ever so gently, I extend my legs out and scoot as close to her as possible.

“Sam?” Her voice calls to me but she still has her back to me.

“Yes baby, it’s me,” I say quietly. 

“What are you doing here?” She asks. 

“I wanted to talk to you but I saw you were sleeping with my hoodie and my pillow so I figured you wanted to snuggle a bit,” I answered. 

“Of course I want to snuggle,” she says, rolling over to face me; her big doe eyes landing on me. They make her look really sleepy but she’s the most beautiful woman in the world. I lean over and kiss her forehead but she speaks again.

“What did you want to talk about?”

I clear my throat, my nerves getting to me again, but I fight them and don’t let them stop me. 

“I want you to stay,” I admit. “I know it sounds selfish and you have another life back in your universe but I don’t care. I love you so much and I want you to stay with me all the time. I can’t stand being away from you especially now with your anxiety not fully being under control yet. I told you you can always come to me when you get upset; I don’t want you fighting this battle alone. I want to hold you when you cry because you need that and I know you won’t admit that to yourself or to me and that’s okay. Because you can push me away when you cry all you want, I’m just going to push you right back to stay with you. I’ve been protecting you every day from the world’s scariest monster but you’re now fighting the toughest and meanest one of all, and you can’t even see it. I wish there was more I could do to help you through this but whatever you need, I am 100% committed to being there for you. No matter if I’m working a case with Dean or if I’m sleeping if you feel an attack coming on, call for me immediately and I’ll be there. But I can’t do that if you leave and go back to your universe. You have a family here who all love you and who want you to stay too. And you can stay in your room permanently and decorate it the way you want it or you can move into my room. We can work something out but all I know is I want you to stay and I want to spend the rest of my life loving you.” I say and get up to grab something from my room.

“Where are you going?” She asks as she props herself up on her elbow to watch me.

“I’ll be right back; I have something for you.” I shuffle into my room and start digging through the drawers of the nightstand by my bed and grab the little box I’ve had sitting in there for the last few weeks. 

Back in y/n’s room, I go over to the side of the bed she was laying on, closest to the wall, and crouch down beside her. 

“What are you doing now? I didn’t get to tell you what I thought about that speech!” She says. 

“Well, there’s a reason why I said that speech,” I say, reaching in my pocket for the box and place it in her hands. 

Suddenly, her eyes go wide and she starts panicking a bit, shaking her head before even looking inside. 

“Sam? What is this? What are you-?” She asks but I cut her off by opening the box and revealing a small yet elegant diamond ring.  

“My Mom gave this to me when she came back from that alternate world we made, remember that?” Y/N couldn’t speak so she just nodded.

“Well, she always thought I’d be the most likely to get married and settle down for a while so she gave this to me. And do you know what she said when she handed it to me?” I ask and Y/N  shakes her head. 

“She told me to make sure that I was 100% sure of the girl when I present this to someone. I never presented this to anyone but you and I are certain you are the one I want to have this. My Dad gave my Mom this and when she had the chance to come back and be with us, she remembered it and decided one of us should get it. Naturally, since he’s the oldest, Mom asked Dean if he wanted it but she always knew he’d say no because I’m the quote “sappy and romantic one. So, y/n, will you marry me?” 

“Sam I-I don’t know what to say. One minute I’m thinking of leaving, the next I’m being proposed to?” She then goes quiet and I can see her processing all the events that just happened. Not long after, she seemed to have come to her conclusion. 

“You know what? I’m not going to freak out about this or overthink this. I love you with my entire being, Sam Winchester. You are the man of my dreams, my ride or die, or as my Mom says to my Dad, my guy till I die. I want to stay here and I want to come to you when I have an attack. It won’t be easy though because I’m stubborn like you Winchesters but I guess that’s why we all get along well, right? I always admired and respected you Sam and I had always dreamed of falling in love with you one day; just never thought it was possible. I want to spend the rest of my life loving you too because I know you don’t think you deserve it. I hate that and wish you didn’t believe that about yourself but you deserve to be loved and to be loved well and deeply by someone else. I am that someone else  Sam; always have been, always will be. You are the love of my life and you are the reason why I will stay here. Yes, I will stay and you bet your cute little tushy I will marry you,” she says and I grin. 

I slide the ring on her left ring finger and kiss her skin right where the ring now sits. I then jump up and attack her, throwing her onto the bed as she laughs. I kiss her lips with all the force I could muster up and she can keep up with my pace with no problems. 

“I love you, future Mrs. Winchester,” I tell her.

“I love you more, Mr. Winchester,” she answers. 

When we finally part for air, she squeals in delight as she looks at the ring on her finger. 

“Damn, how much money did your Dad have back then?” She says, noticing the size of the diamond. 

“Oh, this wasn’t the original ring he gave her when he proposed. He bought this ring right before she died when I was a baby. When she came back, she had it with her all the time so she made sure to give it to me before she was taken away again.” I say, frowning when I think about my Mom. I’m glad I was able to see her and know her for some time but she eventually died again thanks to an incident with Jack. 

“Wow, I-I can’t believe you want me to have this.” She says, admiring the ring on her finger a little longer. 

“Mom said I needed to save it for someone I truly love and want to spend the rest of my life with so I chose you, (y/n). I told her. 

“Which is surprising to me because you could have literally anyone else but yet you choose me.”

“I will always choose you, (y/n). Today, tomorrow, and for the rest of our lives. Because I love you and I don’t want to waste any more time on just waiting around for maybe. I want to start the rest of our lives together now.

“I feel that way too, Sam. I used to think when I would be engaged, I would be anxious about it because I would think ‘is this the right guy? Are we good for each other? Will, we always be faithful to each other?’ but you know, I don’t feel any of that with you. That is how I know this is the right decision for us both.” She says and I couldn’t be happier to hear her say that. 

“So, do you want to go tell Dean?” I ask, looking at the newly engaged woman beside me.

“Mhm, not yet, I want to stay here, maybe kiss a little bit first?” She says with a suggestive look on her face. 

“Mhm, that sounds like something I can do,” I say, leaning over to kiss her...my fiancé. 

Tag List: @tloveswriting @calaofnoldor @thinkinghardhardlythinking @lilulo-12 @fandom-princess-forevermore @hunting-the-grievers @juju-la-tortue @grace15ella​ @to-my-beloved-fandoms-2​

[livefordrama]

Reviewing Dramas I Have Watched Part 6

It’s been a while; I haven’t been able to watch a lot between school and just life. Not to mention the time I do have is spent doing buddy watches of kdramas I have already seen with my friends and family (On teleparty of course.) Again, here is my rating system:  1- Did not like, 2- Enjoyed but probably wouldn’t watch again, 3- Enjoyed and would watch some episodes again (or for movies may watch again), 4- Enjoyed and would watch again, 5- Loved

Korean Drama

Melting Me Softly: 3/5

Melting Me Softly is about a guy and s girl who get cryogenically frozen for an experiment for what was meant to be only a day. Unfortunately, something happens, and the 24-hour experiment turns into 20 years. Now they have to deal with the changes of not only their family and friends but the world and society as a whole all while trying to uncover the darker secrets behind the experiments.

I gave this a 3 because while the earlier and later episodes were amazing and hilarious, the episodes in the middle of the season bored me. I am not much of a romance person unless it is either subtle or played out a specific way and the romance in this wasn’t my personal cup of tea so it just got boring for me. On its good episodes though, it was funny, sad, and cute. I really did like the dynamic between the two main characters and the romance is pretty good, just a little slower in the middle of the series. The relationships with the family members of the two were so cute and so sad, I loved the all the scenes where the mains got to interact with their families. I did feel awkward and weird about the second-lead, I’m not sure if he counts as a second lead but for lack of a better term that’s what I’m calling him. I love Choi Bo-Min as an actor, and it had nothing to do with his acting, just the whole situation was uncomfortable to me. That other guy who doesn’t even deserve to be the second-lead, if you watch it you know, the stalker one, I despise that man. Not once during the entire show did I like one of his scenes. That could be why I didn’t enjoy the middle scenes as much cause he found a way to worm his way into almost every scene and I would get so annoyed with him. This show does have its good points and bad points, so I would recommend it for those who like romance with a little bit of suspense and humor.

Welcome to Waikiki (season 1): 3/5

Welcome to Waikiki is about a group of friends who own and attempt to run a guesthouse together. When they find a baby left behind in one of their rooms, they have to find out how to take care of her and find her mother. This becomes even more complicated when the mother returns in tears saying she had no where else to go and didn’t want her baby to suffer. After hearing about her troubles, they decide to take the two in, in exchange for help working at the guesthouse. It follows the group and mother as they try to figure out how to take care of a baby, save their failing guesthouse, and achieve their own dreams, all while falling in love.

This show was hilarious, I watched it because everyone was talking about how funny it was and I agree. I especially love how it focused on all the characters instead of picking just one or two and focusing on them. I love when shows really work on all their characters and this show played it out so well. Not one was neglected and I didn’t feel like any of them were underdeveloped by the end, and Sol was super cute! I loved every single one of her scenes, she was so funny and sassy and I know she is just a baby but she is amazing. I watched some episodes on the tv and my sisters even made comments on how cute she was when they looked up at the TV, even though they didn’t watch it. I enjoyed the ending and how it all played out and tied together nicely. 

It was a delight for the first two thirds of the season. However, yet again that romance hit and the humor kinda dissipated to be replaced by the romance for a good few episodes. While it was admittedly cute, and I adored the romance scenes in the last few episodes, most romance scenes gave me such second-hand embarrassment I had to pause the show for a while and gain the courage to restart it. I did enjoy it but would probably only ever rewatch the first two thirds and maybe the last two or so episodes. It reminds me of Love With Flaws in the second-hand embarrassment romance scenes, so if you enjoyed that show, definitely give this one a chance. If you like romance, humor, and can handle the second-hand embarrassment stuff I highly recommend this one! It’s super cute and hilarious!

Missing Nine: 5/5                                

Trigger Warning: Plane crash, Blood, Injuries, Suicide attempts, Murder

Missing Nine is about a girl who gets hired as a stylist for an arrogant and cold idol. On her first day, the plane they are all riding on to an event crashes on a vacant island. Only nine of them survive the crash and must now fight to survive and be found all while struggling with the betrayal of one of their friends who began to murder them one by one.

I really enjoyed this one, it was my perfect type of show; angst, suspense, subtle romance, crime, found family. The only issue I had with it was the unrealistic ending, I just don’t understand how it is possible and don’t know how I even personally feel about it. I am also probably one of the very few people who didn’t watch it for Chanyeol, don’t get me wrong I am an Exol too, but like really new Exol. You can skip this parenthesis if you want, it’s a kpop tangent. (I am a huge multistan. I love all the kpop groups I have listened to so far and have all the dalcomsoft games minus Gfriend even though I love them, cause I feel like it’s going to be a BTS superstar and get deleted so it’s not worth my time or efforts. Feel free to talk to me about any group and any member. If I don’t know them, I would be happy to find new ones so even if they are not well known or new, don’t feel worried about squealing to me about them, I would love to make kpop/kdrama loving friends.) I watched for Jung Kyung-ho and only when I started did I see Chanyeol which was cool to find. This also means POSSIBLE SPOILER ALERT I wasn’t disappointed or biased after a certain episode like many of the people I saw raging in the Tvtime comments, not saying this in a bad way just stating that since I am neutral on certain events, I will be focusing on specifically the plot and how I felt about said plot versus how I feel about characters. SPOILER ALERT OVER

Overall I really loved this show, it was certainly an emotional roller coaster. I felt that it could have had a second season or a spin off to tie up that last little cliffhanger but I personally and satisfied with how the main issue wrapped up, other than that one weird ending scene. If you like angst, suspense, crime, and a little romance seen in an enemies to lover type of trope then I highly recommend this show. I gave it a 5 cause I personally loved it and am already planning on rewatching it with my friend. It does have a lot of blood and injuries so if you are sensitive to that, I wouldn’t recommend it to you. 

Because this is my first life: 5/5

Trigger Warning: Sexual Assault, Attempted R@pe (but it didn’t get far at all, just be careful)

Because this is my first life is about a woman (Ji-ho) who has to find a new place to live as her brother is getting married and her parents gave the son the apartment that they had bought for both their children. Because of many misunderstandings and coincidences, she accidentally rents a new apartment with a very strict and stoic man (Se-hee). Due to more problems, the two come to an agreement that they should get married since they both can gain something from it. The woman gains a place to stay and the man gains a tenant to help pay the bills, no more, no less.

Okay, so while I said that I didn’t like romance this is the exception, much like Shopping King Louie, it was just a really cute slow burn that I thoroughly enjoyed watching. Many people in the fandom, on TV time at least, were giving Se-hee a hard time and saying he was using and manipulating Ji-ho but I didn’t see it that way. She consented and never voiced anything other than that and the deal was for her to stay in the apartment since she needed a place to live and he needed someone to help pay bills. He didn’t ask for anything more, she was already following his schedule before the marriage issue and was just fine and accepting when they decided to get married. Neither had any expectations of falling in love, they just both needed something that marriage would help them gain and both consented to it. Later on, Se-hee even asked her if any advances were okay and backed off when they weren’t with no questions asked which I find admirable. Okay, rant over. It was cute and at times annoying cause you just want them to get together already. I laughed so hard in so many episodes and cried in a few too. The cat was so adorable and I love the interactions the main’s had with the little fluff. The best, and sometimes most painful, bonding moments between the main’s were the ones that dealt with the cat. I wasn’t too fond of the love triangle but was pleased with how it actually played out with the two women actually accepting each others presence instead of being horrible to each other for the most part. Highly recommend it to any romance lovers, and especially to those who are fans of shows like Shopping King Louie as mentioned above.

Flower boy next door: 3/5

Trigger Warning: Stalking, Panic Attacks, Sensory overload, Bullying, Teacher Crushes and Manipulation of Such

Flower boy next door follows Dok-mi, a young woman with crippling social anxiety to the point she never leaves her apartment. From her window she watches her across the street male neighbor every day, taking note of his entire schedule. This all comes back to bite her when her neighbor’s brother comes to visit from Spain and catches her. What starts as an attempt to make her stop stalking her brother, quickly progresses into a mission to help her overcome her past, anxiety, and to get out of the house and adapt back to a healthy social life. As this mission goes on the two begins to realize they have feelings for each other, but Dok-mi’s own next-door neighbor has his own mission of getting her to stay inside and fall in love with him. He has been writing a web comic about her being a modern Rapunzel and has been in love with her for many years.

I enjoyed this one, I watched it cause the actor from Psychopath Diary starred in it and it was really cute. The romance was adorable, and the whole telepathy thing was a great addition that made me laugh. I love the whole adorable dork male with quiet cold girl trope so much. I didn’t like the whole stalking situation very much, it’s just kinda weird and was something that made me really uncomfortable during the first few episodes. I wasn’t a huge fan of the next-door neighbor, he just seemed like an enabler to me and I found myself angry through most of his scenes, as well as through most of Dok-mi’s childhood friend’s scenes. Other than those two characters, I enjoyed it well enough. I know some people can get annoyed by each characters flaws but I usually am good with morally grey characters as long as they learn from their mistakes. Some did in this show and there was a lot of character development and some didn’t which is realistic but makes me kind of sad. I recommend it to people who like a cute romance show with some angst and don’t mind morally grey characters.

Web-drama/Mini-series

Ghost Vros: 4/5

Trigger Warning: Suicide, Death, Some gore, Jump scares.

Ghost Vros follows two young men who are trying to start up a business where they hunt ghosts using virtual reality software. The main character is able to sense the ghost through his ears turning red and his friend programs the virtual realty to make sure the main has everything he needs to catch the ghosts.

I liked this one, it was fast like many web dramas are, but really interesting. I did attempt to translate it myself with my, admittedly little, Korean knowledge before finding the English subs (which you won’t be able to find now that Youtube has rudely removed community subs, unless it’s uploaded somewhere else. If someone finds it please let me know.) I was always engaged during the show and wasn’t bored at any point. It did have some confusing points and I wish we got more backstory as there was mentions of some interesting things that was never explored further, but it is a web drama, so that is more than likely too much to ask for. Recommend to anyone who enjoys a quick comedy ghost story.

 Cats Taste and Cat Bartender: 5/5

Cat’s Taste and Cat Bartender follow three cat gods who run a bar at night to make money for their injured owner. At this bar, they give upset humans cocktails which enable them to either posses said human or go into a dream world, this isn’t really clear, and correct the issue in exchange for items the cats find interesting on top of the alcohol cost.

This show was so cute, I absolutely loved and couldn’t stop smiling. I got the first season, Cat’s Taste, on my youtube recommend and decided to watch it since I was bored. I am so glad I did, I got super excited when I saw that there is a second season as well and spent forever trying to hunt it down before a kind person on MyDramaList put a link to the English subs in a comment (if anyone needs it, I will be happy to send it.) Both seasons were amazing, and I am hoping for a season three as the ending looks like it might be set up for one. The way they showed the bartending moves was so pretty and satisfying and I liked how all three cats got to show their moves instead of just the one.  I don’t like alcohol, have tried many kinds many times to but just don’t, however this show makes me want to drink the mixed drinks even though I know I would hate the taste.

Also, is it just me or does Ms. Hana remind anyone of Johnny from NCT? I don’t know if she looks like him or what, sometimes someone reminds me of someone else and the two look nothing alike. Don’t know what that’s all about but let me know because I could not shake the feeling that she reminded me of Mr. Johnny from Chicago. Anyway, tangent aside, I highly recommend to someone who like a quick but cute drama.

Korean Movies

Beautiful Vampire: 3/5

Beautiful Vampire is about a female vampire who tries to avoid people due to her nature, but has all that shattered when she runs into her landlady’s son one night and begins to fall in love.

This movie was pretty good, but a little confusing. I couldn’t even write a proper plot explanation cause I was just so confused. I honestly felt like a fever dream, though a relatively interesting fever dream. I wish we had more information and backstory cause it just kinda felt like a rollercoaster ride of pining. It ended okay; I mean I was bored at the time, so it was something to do. If I am bored in the future, I might watch it again. I agree with most on TvTime when they say, it wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t good, it was just something to do. I feel like the story line needed more work done and that it ended too fast and progressed in such a way that it was hard to follow. If you are bored or have nothing to do, give it a try, you might like it more than I did.

Chinese Drama

Take My Brother Away: 3/5

Trigger Warning: Alcohol Abuse

Take My Brother Away is based on a web comic about two siblings living with their alcoholic, debtor father in China, after their mom filed for a divorce and left. It follows the two as they go to school, work, and try to live a normal life. The sister hates her brother for being lazy and not being able to help her get what she wants, and the brother gets annoyed at the sister for always getting violent with him and nagging him.

I loved this one, it was really interesting to see the dynamic between the family. I felt that the brother should have been given more credit in the beginning for all he does for his sister and I felt really sorry for the sister because she just wanted to be like the other students who could afford to read web comics or go on trips. Some episodes were hilarious, some were heartbreaking, some were admittedly annoying, some gave me secondhand embarrassment. I just love it all, the only reason I give it a three is because I wouldn’t watch all 50 episodes again, I loved it but some were more on the boring side like filler episodes and I just, don’t think I’ll ever watch the whole series again. I can defiantly say however, I will probably watch most of the episodes again. I enjoyed the ending though it was admittedly on the strange side, and felt it was wrapped up nicely. There was a lot of character development too which is always great. I recommend this to those who enjoy some dysfunctional family humor and some angst and who are able to commit to long seasons.

 Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

[pleasejustfuckinghugme]

Forever

episode one pt. two (word count: 2,333)

jacobs!oc x fezco

warnings: mentions of abuse and attempted rape, crude language, drugs, alcohol, sexual themes

Nancy and I had been best friends since freshman year after her brother tried to finger me at the freshman formal. After she saw me running to the ladies room and heard her brother dick around with his friends, she knew something was wrong. She ran to the bathroom and refused to leave me alone for the rest of the night, eyeing her twin at all times. Later that night, she confronted him about it when they got back home, and he slapped her across the face. They didn’t acknowledge each other for an entire month after that. Nate eventually apologized. It was a shitty apology, but Nancy was nice. And way too forgiving. 

Then Nancy met Maddy after she and Nate started dating, and they became best friends. They pretty much told each other everything, so when Maddy found out about Nate hitting Nancy, she was furious. Nancy refused to let her do anything; she knew that if Maddy confronted him he would do the same thing to her. They promised they would always be there for each other instead, and so far, they had managed to keep that promise.

“Bitch, you’re coming,” Maddy scolded her from across the room. Nancy was sitting on her bed, watching as Maddy applied glitter to her eyelids. 

The girl flinched as Maddy stood up, throwing her eyeliner at her.

“Nate won’t be happy.”

“He’s not your fucking dad, so it doesn’t matter,” Maddy argued. “And this way you’ll meet the rest of the cheer team before school starts.”

“Fine,” Nancy sighed as she began to apply her eyeliner.

“Honestly, I think Nancy’s gonna catch the most dick tonight. She look hot as fuck,” BB snorted, taking a breath of her vape. 

“Yeah right,” Nancy scoffed. “If I did, it would only because Maddy’s letting me borrow her dress.” She winked at her friend through the mirror, but Maddy didn’t see as she was too preoccupied looking at her boobs.

“Do you think my areolas look weird?” she asked, turning to look at Kat and Nancy.

“No,” Kat returned, scrolling on her phone. Nancy said nothing as she chewed her bottom lip, concentrating on winging her liner.

“But, like, the edges though,” Maddy pressed.

Kat finally looked up at the girl, “Maddy, they’re fine.”

Maddy narrowed her eyes at the girl, “Fine like they’re kind of weird, or fine like nobody would ever notice what I notice?”

“Fine like shut the fuck up, Maddy,” BB called from the bathroom.

“Your boobs are wonderful,” Nancy reassured. She stood up from the bed and started slipping on her black a-line dress.

“I’m disgusting. I literally look disgusting,” Maddy rambled, looking at herself in the mirror.”

“Maddy, you need to snap the fuck out of this. You’re hot as fuck. Nate’s a loser! Who cares?” Kat whined.

Nancy plopped down next to her on the bed, grunting in agreement. “Exactly, that’s why we should just skip the whole thing.”

Maddy rolled her eyes and faced them, “No, Nancy. Besides he’s not a loser, he’s a dick.”

Nancy scoffed as Kat mumbled, “All dicks are losers, duh.”

“Look, bottom line. Y’all need to walk into this party like your pussy costs a million dollars,” BB slurred walking to Maddy’s closet.

Nancy shifted awkwardly on the bed as Maddy replied, “I’d probably settle for, like, fifty grand.”

“Fifty grand is a million dollars.”

“I’d settle for, like, four Corona Lites and some non-rapey affection,” Kat muttered. Nancy pushed her shoulder playfully as BB cringed, “That’s kind of depressing.”

“Nate just, like, totally ruins my confidence,” Maddy huffed. “You know when somebody just constantly criticizes, like, everything about you?” 

This prompted Nancy to go over to the girl, giving her a small, comforting hug and a peck on the cheek.

“Yep, that’s like every guy,” BB assured.

“You just need to catch a dick and forget about your troubles,” Kat affirmed, causing Maddy to whip around as Nancy giggled.

“Girl, you just need to catch a dick,” she accused. She lightly smacked Nancy on her cheeks. “And you’re no better either, bitch.”

Nancy rolled her eyes and flicked Maddy’s forehead. “Shut up,” she scoffed, laughing.

“Seriously, Maddy. The best thing to do after a break up is to fuck someone new and then move on.”

“Please, Kat, remind me again how many guys you fucked, and um, oh yeah, catfishing, that don’t count,” BB accused, waving the girl off. Hurt flashed in Kat’s eyes as she returned to applying her mascara.

“BB,” Nancy warned.

Maddy faced BB, scowling. “Can you not be a cunt for like fifteen seconds?” she shot, defending the girl.

A knock interrupted their conversation. The door to Maddy’s room opened and her dad began to speak.

“Dad! Stop being a pervert! We’re literally, like, all naked!” Maddy squealed. The door promptly shut again, and the four girls looked at each other before breaking out into laughter.

The small town seemed to come alive at night. Red, green, and pasty yellow lights reflected through Maddy’s car as the four girls rode to McKay’s. Nancy laid her head on the window, watching neon lights streak past as the car glided down the road. Further ahead of the car, the reflection of a golden jacket caught her eyes. Squinting, she looked at the figure walking down the road. It was a girl with long, frizzy brown hair, her caramel skin glowed under the street lights. Suddenly, realization struck her.

“Holy shit,” she breathed, jerking her head up.

“Is that?” Maddy trailed off, slowing her car down to a stop.

“Oh shit! That’s Rue!” BB gasped, taking a hit of her vape.

“Didn’t Rue, like, die?” Maddy quizzed, causing Nancy to lightly punch her shoulders, scolding her, “Don’t say that shit, Maddy.”

BB leaned back in her seat, “Oh my god, I hate ghosts.”

When the car was close enough to the girl, Nancy and Kat both stuck their heads out the window.

Nancy called out her name as Kat hollered, “Ayo, Casper!”

Rue turned towards the car.

“Wanna ride?” Kat winked.

Rue sauntered over to the car and leaned in close to Kat. A smile crept across her lips as she nodded, “Why, thank you.”

Nancy whooped in approval and swung her door open. “Bitch!” she proclaimed wrapping her arms around the tipsy teenager. Rue smiled sloppily and scooted into the car next to Nancy.

As they continued their trek to the party, Nancy thought about everything she wanted to ask Rue. How was she? How was rehab? Was her family okay? Was she okay? But she didn’t ask any of these things. Rue was already drunk; her stumbling down the road and glassy eyes made that obvious. And Nancy knew Rue well enough that if Rue was drunk and headed to a party that meant two things: rehab was not working and Rue was definitely going down a spiral. Nancy looked at her old friend, who sat staring out the window, rolling her eyes at the conversation between Kat and Maddy in front of her.

She reached her arm over and brought Rue into another embrace, “I missed you, you know?”

Rue squeezed her shoulders and gave her a tight smile, “I missed you too.”

“Maybe we can hang out sometime this week? Catch up?”

Rue’s eyes grew at the question. A hint of happiness shown through her orbs. “Yeah, I’d like that,” she grinned.

When they pulled up to the party, the whole front yard was already filled with drunk students. Red solo cups flew around the air, and the stench of alcohol and weed was almost suffocating as they walked into the house. Nancy made her way to the kitchen with her girls, and they all grabbed some beer before making their way to the living room.

Now, we all know that this night got fucking weird. So now that the four girls were all completely wasted, it was time for them to take their newfound, drunken confidence and use it to unwillingly embarrass themselves. However, luckily for Nancy, her drunk alter ego did her some favors, and while Maddy was busying herself with getting back at Nate, Kat was losing her virginity, and BB was out doing God knows what, Nancy found herself strutting towards the cute boy from that same morning. You know, the one who sold her drugs.

“Fancy seeing you again,” she jested, plopping down beside him on the couch. She kicked her feet up onto the table in front of them, showing off her Doc Martens.

“Hey, kid,” Fezco spoke, sitting up on the couch. “Shit, you come to these parties? I ain’t ever seen ya around before.”

“My first real party,” Nancy snorted, putting up jazz hands, making the man chuckle quietly.

“Word,” he affirmed. “That’s what’s up. How’s it been so far?” His eyes never left hers.

She smiled at his question, her eyes sparkling. “Fucking great,” she gushed. “I had like five shots and some beers and danced for hours.”

He laughed, shaking his head, “Good for you, kid. Jus’ stay away from those drugs, right?”

She saluted and echoed his words, “Aye, staying away from drugs.”

She watched as he took a drag of the roll tucked between his fingers. He closed his eyes and leaned back as he puffed the smoke out. Slowly, he turned back to look at her, and she met his eyes, a small smile growing on her face.

However, the serenity between the two at that moment was shortcoming as Nancy began to feel her insides twist inside her. The alcohol was starting to catch up, and the hazy, relaxed feeling in her head began to turn into a throbbing sensation. She jerked up from the couch, startling the man as she ran to find the closest bathroom. She ducked around people, running into some before she finally reached the toilet, whipping the door open. Chunky liquid left her system, and the awkward feeling of throwing up, along with the horrid stench, caused her eyes to prickle with tears.

She was startled when she felt someone pull her hair back for her, placing their other hand on her back. The palm rubbed circles as the person spoke, “Shit, kid. You drank way too much.”

When she was finally finished ridding the toxins from her body, she leaned back from the toilet. Fezco handed her some toilet paper, and she wiped off her mouth. Her makeup was totally ruined, black streaks running down her cheeks and lipstick smudged.

“Fuck,” she muttered. “I’m sorry.”

“Nah, don’t worry ‘bout me. You good?” he rubbed her back, watching her closely. She refused to look at him, too embarrassed.

“I will be. Thank you,” she whispered.

He smiled warmly at her. “Never caught ya name.”

“Nancy,” she answered, finally meeting his gaze. He was smiling at her, but it wasn’t an amused smile. It was something else.

“Right. I think I heard Nate mention you before.”

“Shit,” she muttered. “He’s gonna fucking murder me if he sees me like this.”

She began to stand up, but lost her balance. Fezco chuckled, steadying her. “You betta’ slow down. I think he’ll survive. He ain’t ya dad.”

She thinly smiled, nodding. “Right.” She laughed dryly and he gave her a questioning look. “Fuck, this is, like, really embarrassing,” she confessed.

He shook his head, “Kid, I’m so fuckin’ high who knows if I’ll remember this.”

She laughed, shaking her head. “Thank you, really.” They looked at each other quietly for a moment, eyes locked together. Nancy could feel her stomach starting to turn again, but something was different about it this time. There was more of a fluttering rather than her organs getting flipped around. She looked away, stuttering, “I should probably go home.”

Fezco nodded, “Alright. I’ll see ya around, kid.”

She let out a soft okay before turning to find Maddy in the crowd. But she ran into her brother first.

“The fuck you doing here? What happened?” Nate bellowed, looking down at her. Her hair was a frizzy mess and one of her spaghetti straps had fallen off her shoulder. Her eyes were puffy when she looked up at him. 

“Shut up,” she scowled at him. “Have you seen Maddy?”

He turned around, looking past the back window into the pool. Nancy leaned over to see around him and saw Maddy in the pool with another boy. She turned back to her twin, hesitantly grabbing his forearm to get his attention. 

“Can we just go home?” she croaked. He looked down at her, not saying anything for a moment, before slowly nodding his head.

“Come on,” he grunted, leading her out the house and to his car.

When they got home, Nate walked around the truck and opened the door for her, helping her as she stumbled out of the car.

“Can you at least look like you can fucking walk before dad sees you? Jesus,” he grumbled, helping her walk to the door.

When they got inside she pulled away, stumbling up the stairs. She whispered a goodnight to him before staggering into her room and on her bed. She groggily kicked off her shoes before pulling her comforter up. Her head was throbbing, and her eyes felt heavy as she laid on her bed, sending a quick text to Maddy letting her know she went back home.

She heard her door creak open.

“Goodnight, kiddo. You need anything?” she heard her dad whisper from across the room. She looked over at him. He was peeking his head through her door, looking at her with kind eyes. 

“Can I get some water?” she yawned. “And some Tylenol?”

She heard him chuckle, “Sure thing, kid.”

When he came back and handed her the pills she swallowed them and chugged the bottled water before plopping her head back on her pillows. She felt her father gave her a quick peck on the forehead, whispering goodnight, before sleep engulfed her.

[tobesensation-9]

hi~ i really love your writings 🥰👌🏼 anw, i want to request a scenario(?) when sf9 and s/o have to babysit their s/o's 3y.o niece for 24h? d-do you get what i mean.. 🥺 shsjdjsh i love you pls stay healthy and stay safe!!!!! 🥺🧡🙏🏼

This is so adorable 😍. I have nieces and one of them is three so this is soo cute to write! Thanks a lot and you too, stay strong 💪.

SF9: Babysitting Together

Youngbin

When you mentioned the news to him he was really excited. “Really? I’ll finally meet her!”

“Hi yn/n!” She’d run to you with her cute little legs while your sibling drops her off. You’d pick her up and turn to Youngbin so they can officially meet. Of course like a lot of little kids she’s nervous.

“Hi! My name is Youngbin. You’re so cute.”

She’d act timid not saying anything or waving at first because she was too busy hiding her face in your chest.

But as the day went on she and Youngbin became the closest friends. You started to get envious seeing that she was having more fun with him than she was with you.

“(The title she calls you) look at what Bin and I made?”

She’d come to you with a cookie in hand. You knew he wanted to make cookies with her. A brave task to take with a three-year-old, but he survived and had a ton of fun.

The cookie had the cuteness of what a toddlers art would looks like, only on a cookie. You took a piece and ate it in delight.

“Mmmm. It’s so good!” At your compliment she’d run over to Youngbin and hug him telling him how much you loved the cookie. He’d look up at you smiling and you smile back.

Inseong

This intellectual lol. Would definitely want to teach your niece a few things.

You’d be making them lunch in the kitchen when you see Inseong and your niece laying on the floor looking at a book.

It showed pictures of the different planets of the solar system. You loved how it wasn’t the ideal dolls and other ideal girl toys. So you loved it even more that she was really into it.

“What is this one called? It’s so biiiiiggg.”

“That’s Jupiter. Did you know it’s the largest planet in the solar system?”

“WHATTT?”

He’d end up taking her to the store and coming back after getting supplies to make their own solar system model. 

They’d talk about all sorts of things until her bedtime approached. She’d would definitely be reluctant unless he read more books to her as she fell asleep.

Jaeyoon

He’s always doing crafty things on vlive, so I see him making bracelets with her. When you told him he’d make the effort to buy all sorts of charms at the arts and crafts store. Wanting to give her a huge variety to choose from.

“So you’d add them like this.” The three of you are sitting at the table adding the charms to your bracelets.

“I don’t know what to add?” You could tell that he took the variety so seriously it kinda overwhelmed her.

“Well.... what about this one?” He’d pick a crown charm. “A crown?”

“Yeah, because your beautiful princess.”

“Yay a princess!” She’d end up making a bracelet with nothing but crowns, shoes and dresses, on it reminding you guys every 10 minutes that she was a beautiful princess.

You’d definitely have to buy her a crown before the day was over.

Dawon

After seeing how he interacted with the kids on ‘WDDD’ Dawon has an even bigger soft spot in my heart. Similar to the concept of his variety show, he'd try to complete every task that your niece requests, even the one’s he may not like 😂 ...

“What color do you like? I like purple on you.” 

“Ahhh....okay that's fine. That shade is pretty so I’ll let you.” 

“It is! I knew you'd like it!” 

You’d walk in on your niece giving Sanghyuk a make over. His hair was tied and two disheveled ponytails, with cutely and messy done makeup and now she was polishing his nails. He seemed to do a good job of making sure she didn’t make a mess of anything. But instead, his face was her creative canvas. 

“Oh you look so pretty!” You teased him, sitting in his stool, glaring at you and smiling back at your niece through the pain. 

Also see him giving her piggyback rides running all of over the play with with her squealing and laughing delight.

Zuho

Like Inseong, I see him sharing his knowledge and interest with your niece and she suck all of it up like a sponge. I’ve learned that young kids are so receptive and willing to learn new things all the time, its too cute. I also had to take the idea from SF9 Sangsa (the new episode was priceless 😂). 

So he’d be making music on one of her piano toys and she'd be so astounded.  

“Wait can you do that again?” 

“What this?” 

He’d play a short and cute segment of the chorus of ‘Summer Breeze’ and she’d love it and bounce around dancing like how cute toddlers are. He’d be jumping around and dancing with her too. He’d even be trying to teach her at one point, with her hitting all the wrong keys and laughing together. 

From all the excitement she’d have him playing the same melody from the song until she had gotten tired of it. 

Rowoon

I see Seokwoo really just trying to engage with your niece. Like he’d bring up different topics or she’d bring up different things and they'd be talking and playing for hours. 

You’d laugh at how inquisitive your niece would get. Seeing their interactions would tickle you to your core. 

“Mr. Seokwoo?” 

“Call me Uncle Seokwoo”. This would make you snicker 

He’d be sitting next to her, leaning to her giving her all his attention. 

“Uncle Seokwoo, are you a giant?” 

He’d chuckle, “Am I a giant?” 

“Yeah. You’re so big. I was scared when I first saw you. Because you look like a giant.” 

“Well, I guess you can call me that. You don’t have to be scared. I’m the nicest giant you'd meet.” He’d poke her nose and flash her a smile. She’d giggle and they'd giggle together. 

It was so cute and funny how quick she warmed up to him and how his charms can work on anyone. 

Taeyang

Taeyang just seems so gentle and tender. I think any kid would love him. Of course I think he would try to cook with her or teach her some dance moves. They’d be in a separate room, and you'd hear him playing tons of SF9 songs teaching her some of the dances. Of course modifying them to make the easier for her.

“Like this?’ She’d ask. 

“Yeah, just like that. You really got the hang of it!” 

In the living room where you were you’d see your niece running out of the room with Taeyang walking behind

“Can we you show you the dances Taeyang taught me?” 

“Sure go ahead.” 

With a speaker in hand, Taeyang would start playing ‘Life is so Beautiful’ which you’d assume was her favourite song to dance too since you heard this one the most. 

She’d look back a Taeyang the entire time laughing with the biggest smile on her face. 

Hwiyoung

For some reason I see him having playful banter with your niece. Younger kids can't help but be honest. I think that would poke at his sensitive side and it would turn into playful banter. 

“Youngkyun, where are your sleeves?” 

She’d be touching his arm. He was wearing one of his iconic no-sleeve, chuffed shirts 

“It doesn't have any.” 

“Why? It’s cold outside. You’re gonna get sick.” 

“I wore a jacket yn/n”. 

“Thats not warm enough. Find your sleeves”. 

“I told you it’s not supposed to have them.” 

You’d see them talking and see him getting flustered by the bluntness of a three-year-old. 

He’d look at you, flushed, but trying to laugh it off 😅😂.

Chani

I see him and your niece having a competition to see who’s the cutest for your attention. Like an aegyo contest. 

She’d come up to you just being a natural cutie pie telling all the things she’s doing and you praising her for it. And right after to play with her he’d tap you and do some of his famous aegyo and turning to her for a reaction. 

Not realising herself she’d try acting cuter for the rest of the day. 

“Look (your title)! My dress looks super cute with all the glitter!” 

“Look y/n, aren’t my cute eyes and cheeks cuter’, you’d just scoff at him and you’d see your niece just starring at him tapping you to tell you something that she thinks was better.

Even with this little competition they’d get along perfectly. That’s just the nature of Chani he seems to get along well with anyone.  

Extra points 

- I also think that some of them wouldn’t have any trouble putting her to sleep like Jaeyoon, Inseong, Rowoon and Taeyang. But I think the rest of them would need your help with that. 

- Even for those who would have trouble, she’d most likely take a nap next to or leaning on them instead of you before the day was over

- (Definitely see Rowoon, Zuho, Taeyang, and Youngbin just picking her up and laying her on his chest if they were sitting in the coach next to you). 

- Your niece would also want ideal food that kids would like, like pizza and chicken nuggets in the shape of dinosaurs. And all of then would agree with her, especially Zuho. 

- I see you trying to disagree and suggest something else but they end up chanting for dinosaur nuggets together 

- And not forgetting their juice or milk boxes that you’d serve both of them.