#okay to reblog but not open for argument. I just have a lot of thoughts.

[grison-in-space]

I'm genuinely sorry, I was really tired and couldn't think of the word that mad pride movements use. I'm new to all of this. I thought you would be more open to it because you've reblogged from radical leftists (anarchists and communists both) within the past couple of weeks and they're all for Veganism afaik. The argument that all brains are different but equal and should be treated the exact same is a primary aspect of mad pride from my understanding, and that speaks to me about animals just having different brains, and that they don't deserve to be exploited and killed for us just because they're different. I'm not spamming people with it, but I was inspired by an ask by a nonvegan and started asking popular bloggers why they weren't vegan to open up conversation and potentially change people's views on animals. If I've made you uncomfortable I'm sorry, though I admit I'm really confused by your standpoint. You do know that the only reason communism hasn't succeeded is because of America? Anyway, sorry again, I'm also autistic and I didn't mean to dismiss your legitimate dietary needs. Can I recommend acti-vegan's posts? While I understand that you can't go vegan, perhaps their blog will at least help you understand our points, they're much more well-written than my asks and they have plenty of legitimate science resources at hand. Thanks for listening, I'll take your advice into account. I'm not trying to not listen, it's just frustrating because so many people say they get it but they don't change, and if they truly got it they would, you know?

Okay, I get that you didn't mean to be offensive, and fuck knows I shouldn't throw stones when it comes to forgetting specific words. (This happens to me fairly frequently; it's a thing.)

The argument that all brains are different but equal and should be treated the exact same is a primary aspect of mad pride from my understanding, and that speaks to me about animals just having different brains, and that they don't deserve to be exploited and killed for us just because they're different.

So yesterday I actually wrote out and then deleted a whole paragraph to the effect of "part of my deep, deep frustration with animal rights activism hooks into my commitment to the phrase 'nothing about us without us,' because I frequently see the same kinds of emotional projection without making the effort to listen to animals on their own terms from animal rights activism groups."

The first thing I need to make clear to you is that this--veganism and animal rights activism (ARA) more generally--is not new to me. I am in my mid-thirties and I have never had a job of any kind that did not revolve around animals in some way, I've spent time in rescue spaces and vets and universities, I'm queer and I have spent most of my life in leftish progressive circles, so it's kind of hard to miss.

Essentially, you are proselytizing to me as if you were a newly baptized evangelical convinced I had never heard of Jesus, because if only I had heard and understood his holy word, I would be converted instantly to his light! It's not any less irritating when the belief system isn't explicitly a religion.

More under the cut, because this one is long.

Disclaimer one: Veganism isn't synonymous with ARA ideology, but it's deeply entangled with it, and ARA ideology drives the movement of veganism as a (theoretically non-religious) ethical decision. And I object very strongly to the framework imposed by ARA activists. When I say I am not vegan, I am saying that I have considered the ethical framework that underpins veganism as an ethics movement and I have deliberately rejected it.

The second piece of context you should know that when I talk about being a behavioral ecologist, I mean that I'm a researcher who works on animals and that my framework is rooted in trying to understand animals in their own natural ecological context, without necessarily comparing them to humans. There's a lot of ways to study animal behavior you might run into, including attempts to understand universal principles of behavior that transcend species (animal cognition) and attempts to understand how to better treat animals in human care (animal welfare). You know Temple Grandin? Temple Grandin is an ethologist (the field that gave rise to behavioral ecology, also focused on animals within their species context) who worked on animal welfare (finding ways to make slaughterhouses less stressful to livestock, among other things).

Third point: my profession also means is that I work directly with animals--in my case, currently mice--and that I do not think research with animal subjects is wrong as long as all efforts are made to ensure maximal welfare and enrichment for the animals involved. This is another major bone of contention politically between my entire field and ARA groups, and you should know that I have also spent my entire professional career under the shadow of, well, people who care strongly enough about those ideas to invade my workspace and potentially seize my animals and "free" them into a world they do not have the tools to survive in.

So there's where I am coming from. Let's get back to what you're saying. Here, I'll quote again in case you have the same crappy short-term memory I do.

The argument that all brains are different but equal and should be treated the exact same is a primary aspect of mad pride from my understanding, and that speaks to me about animals just having different brains, and that they don't deserve to be exploited and killed for us just because they're different.

Point the first: Even within humans, I don't think that all brains should be treated the exact same. Especially in a disability context! After all, what is an accommodation if not an agreement to treat someone differently because they need certain things to access a space? Accommodations by definition fly in the face of this "treating everyone the same" understanding of fairness. I think all (human) brains are equally valuable, and I think all brains are worthy of respect, but I do not think that it's wise or kind of me to assert that everyone should be treated in the same way. For one thing, I teach students. If there's one thing teaching has taught me, it's that a good teacher is constantly assessing and adjusting their instruction to meet students where they're at, identify failures of understanding, and keep the attention of the classroom.

Point the second: animals do have different brains from humans. That does not mean that animals are inferior, but it does mean that they are alien. There's a philosophy paper, Nagel, What Does It Mean to Be a Bat, that you might find illuminating on this front. Essentially, the point of the paper is that animals have their own experiences and sensory umwelts that differ profoundly enough from humans' that we cannot know what it is like to be a different species without experiencing life as one, and therefore we must be terribly careful not to project our own realities onto theirs. That is, our imagination cannot tell us what a bat values and what it experiences. That is why we have to use careful evidence to understand what an animal is thinking, without relying on our ability to identify with and comprehend that animal. I have watched ARA groups deliberately encourage people to shut their reasoning brains off and emotionally identify themselves with animals without considering within-species context for twenty years. This is a mainstream tactic. It is not an isolated event and for that reason alone I would be opposed to them.

Point the third: there is a definite tendency in lots of people to care deeply and intensely about both animals and people who are seen as "lesser" in status--children, poor people, disabled people, etc--just as long as those groups never contradict the good feelings that come from the helper's own assessment of themselves and their actions. In humans, when the "needy" point out that some forms of help are actually harmful, the backlash is often swift and vicious. This is why animals are such an appealing target of support and intervention. They can't speak back and say "in fact, you are projecting my love of this frilly pink tutu onto me, and I think it's uncomfortable and prevents me from walking." They can't say "I kind of like it better when I don't have to worry about getting hit by a car, actually?"

(By the way: this is also why it's offensive to compare disabled people to animals, because this is generally done at least in part to silence the voices of disabled people speaking for our selves and our communities. We have access to language, and we use it, thank you.)

All forms of animal welfare intervention going right back to the founding of the first RSPCA have been incredibly prone to being hijacked by classist, racist, and otherwise bigoted impulses. This is because animals offer an innocent face for defense that conveniently cannot criticize the actions taken by their champions, and they therefore provide a great excuse for actions taken against marginalized members of human society. Think about the very first campaign the RSPCA ever did, which was banning using dogs as draft animals: a use that is not inherently harmful to dogs, which many dogs actively enjoy, but also one that was specifically used by poor Londoners and which in fact immediately resulted in a great butchery of the dogs that Londoners could no longer afford to feed rather than allowing poor people and their dogs to continue working together. No one was, of course, challenging the particular uses of dogs or any other animal favored by the wealthy. This kind of thing is so, so, so common. Obviously it doesn't mean that all interventions to prioritize animal welfare are inherently bigoted, but it does mean that we have to be critical about our choice of challenges.

On top of everything, the animal rights activist movement's obsession with "exploitation" is a function of the idea that humans are sinful or otherwise Bad in how we interact with animals by definition. For example, take the chicken rescue near me that is so obsessed with the possibility that some human somewhere might benefit from an animal in their care that they implant every hen they adopt out with hormonal implants such that the hens no longer lay eggs--a function that is normally a natural byproduct of a chicken's reproductive system, fertilized or not. A mutualistic relationship involves both parties benefiting, and that is the case for an awful lot of human relationships with animals. In general, the idea that associating with animals is a thing that can only harm animals rather than being a trade between two species to enrich one another is all over these groups. It's just so myopically focused on human shame that it prevents practical interventions that might benefit everyone, and often promotes interventions that don't directly benefit animals but sure do make humans miserable. For example, this kind of thinking is why groups like PETA are absolutely awful at effectively rescuing unwanted dogs and cats: they think pets living in "bondage" with humans are an essentially sad outcome, rather than one that might be mutually enjoyed by all parties.

I'm tired and my meds haven't kicked in, so I'm not currently going to handle the communism thing except to point out that while the US absolutely did destabilize a number of leftist regimes in South America and Africa, Russia and China between them have certainly not treated their own people kindly, either (and more so their own client-nations, as with the former members of the USSR). Please do some reading about the Holodomor and Lysenko in Russia (and frankly all of the details of Stalin's regime) and the Cultural Revolution in China in particular. Khmer Rouge might be worth looking into, too. I am not saying the US's hands are clean, you understand, because they are not; they're as steeped in red as anyone else's. What I am saying is that for people living on the ground, communist revolutions have this nasty habit of turning into bloodbaths and arbitrary slaughters. Do not let your distaste for the US's bloodsoaked imperialism (which, yes, is and was bad) let you fall into the trap of becoming a tankie.

And if you don't know what a tankie is, you really, really should take some time to learn.

[starillusion13]

Hi! Your fics are so good! specially the ot8xreader fic 💖💖💖

Can i also request ot8xreader, you suddenly disappeared and they thought you ran away (with their money and jewelries) and betrayef them but in reality one of their female employees leads you to nowhere and tried to kill you (because she is jealous and wants the boys for herself) she make it looks like you ran away to make the boys mad at you but you are laying in hospital bed comatose for months. one of boys/or member of the mafia saw you in hospital when they tried to smuggle medical equipments and report it to ateez.

I hope it make sense 😅 Thank you

You are our Home

Pairing: Mafia! Ateez x f!reader

Genre: Angst, Mafia, Fluff

W.C: 8.2k

Warnings: arguments, regret, trust issues, cheating(?), hints of torture, mention of cuts and wounds(just the pain not detailed), mention of hospital and mafia business and deals, traumas and betrayals, comatose, stroke, nausea, scared, crying, lies. A lot shit is going on in the fic.

Networks: @cultofdionysusnet @k-vanity

Note: Thanks for reading and reblogging. I appreciate all of your reviews and feel free to text me if you want. Spread love to others, not hate. I don’t know what’s up to with the requests coz all are Angst at this point. But I have included fluff here. Clap your hands👏.

“Are you sure she is not home?”

“Seonghwa, I have gone there myself to check the whole place. Even few of her things are missing. Something is not setting right here.” Hongjoong’s impatient voice echoed through the speaker in the room. The members round the table were all attentive to the conversation between the two older ones. “Yeosang is tracking her id but he couldn’t find anything important. And what about San? Did he come back?”

Hearing the question, Seonghwa looked towards Wooyoung who shook his head and the older one sighed before delivering the message to their leader on call. Before hanging up the call, he informed the three members to come back to their office for further discussion about you. They last heard your voice yesterday evening when you were asking them if they would return yesterday or the next day. They didn’t know that the next day, instead of finding you waiting for them at the parking lot, they will be greeted to an empty cabin.

Usually, whenever they go to overseas missions, you pass on it because you intend to maintain all the procedures in the office and home. They respect your thoughts and opinions a lot so they never said anything on those way of thinking. Just like other trips, they bid goodbye to you and they went off to the designated country. When they reached there, you had a video call with them and they assured you that they would return soon—one month would pass in a blink. But maybe something went wrong. With the passing of days, you became distant with them, not picking up their calls or maybe just leaving a short text message ‘I’m busy’ and your close employee friend, Amy supported your side, telling them that the company had some issues ongoing with money and she also sent them all the details where it was always your duty to do it. Generally, they didn’t mind but they were worried for you overworking yourself so they told Amy to look after you. She assured them that she would be always by your side and would manage to do the most of the works.

Today, it was their day of return and last evening hearing your voice over the call made them impatient to come back home soon. They wanted to talk to you a lot but somehow you were not in a mood to hold a long conversation with them and so they didn’t ask you anything much. It was okay because they knew very next moment you will be in their arms and then they will keep you away from workloads for a while. But who knew, you won’t be anywhere in their surroundings.

San slammed the door open and glared at the ones present inside the room. The one who was sitting near the door rolled his eyes, knowing his over-dramatic acts like usual but when he caught his gaze, he could see the fire in his eyes.

Seonghwa raised his brow from the end of the table, “What happened, San?” Wooyoung and Mingi close to him were also watching San shuffling his hairs in anger and threw the glass from the table beside Jongho, who was already annoyed with him from earlier.

“Where is Hongjoong?”

Wooyoung was quick to reply, “He was on a call with us almost an hour back. They went to our home and then they will stop by the store to pick up some packages. They will be back soon.” Mingi nodded and went back to check some important news, displaying on his phone screen.

“Who else has the access to the shared account?”

“What do you mean by that, San? You know we don’t use that account and it’s only get handled by y/n. after she returns, you can ask her about it if it has any problem.” Seonghwa said it calmly but he could see the impatient and a flick of rage in the man’s eyes. San again picked up a glass but got stopped by Jongho, “don’t throw it again.”

They glared at each other before gulping down the water and he turned towards the oldest one.

“did she tell anything about transacting large amount of money? You know the account is empty as well as the spare account doesn’t have any money. The locker with the expensive jewels in her cabin is also empty. Why does she need so much of money all of a sudden?”

Everyone was shocked on hearing him. You needed money and for what? Nobody had any sort of hint that maybe you were going through some rough days, they would have consulted things with you. They would have tried to make you relax but no—you kept everything to yourself and didn’t tell anything to them. You were in some trouble and the thought itching their mind to ask you about it.

“her phone is still switched off.” Jongho sighed and sat on the couch beside Mingi who glanced at the clock.

San sat beside Wooyoung, “What’s even going on? There is no news of her whereabouts. She is not picking up her calls and now all these moneys and jewelleries are missing. I want her to explain me everything right now.”

“San, calm down. I am sure she has her own reasons for this.”

“And when do you think will she return, Mingi? Are you sure we are just going to sit and wait for her?”

Before the other could say anything, the door slammed open and Hongjoong entered furiously with Yeosang and Yunho trailing behind him. Neither of them appeared any less frustrated than the leader. Wooyoung was still staring at the door until it got closed by Yunho. He sighed and looked away—he thought you might enter the room with them and then would surprise them with a silly joke and the rest of the day will end up with you getting scolded but in the end you knew it was because they care for you.

Where are you?

“What’s the news, Yeosang?”

Hongjoong sat on his chair and ruffled his hairs, Seonghwa patted his back and looked towards the hacker who was being asked a question by the youngest.

“Nothing Jongho. We can’t find her anywhere. It’s still showing her last location was at the A.T.M and we checked the C.C.T.V but she was pretty normal when entering it and exiting the stall. I don’t why was she there-“

“to withdraw all the moneys from her shared account and the private one.”

Hongjoong raised his brows at San, “why do you think so?”

“Amy showed me all the past transactions from her side. She might not have withdraw all the money in person but has transferred to some other accounts.” He signalled Yeosang to open his laptop and the one was quick in action, “Can you search the accounts that are connected with hers where the money got transferred?”

Yunho scanned the room, “but why did she need such large amount of money? I am pretty sure she would have told one of us if she was in trouble.”

Seonghwa nodded and walked towards the wide large glass window and stared at the city. He was trying to find your location in the chaos of the city, his eyes were roaming everywhere as if he could get a glimpse of you. He was behaving like a lost boy desperate for you to hug him. Maybe he was a the second in command after the most feared mafia leader, Hongjooong--- in the end it’s you with whom they are the real persons, they can be themselves. Tears flowed down his eyes and he didn’t notice that Wooyoung was standing behind him and suddenly patted his back. He himself was fighting the urge not to break down.

Hongjoong glanced at them across the room and sighed.

Mingi put down his phone and the typing of the keyboard was heard along with some frustrated groans. Jongho spoke up, “San told us that the jewelleries are also missing from her lockers.”

“What? Even her expensive items from her room were also missing.” Hongjoong was surprised that you were missing for so many hours and then all those money and other expensive items were missing too.

Yeosang shut his laptop with a groan and glared at the device. San beside him asked what happened but the news they got was not what they were expecting.

“She has been transferring money for last 6 months and for the last one month, she has spent money on some expensive trips and buying properties. The two accounts where the moneys are being transferred are highly protected with firewalls. I can’t access to it. It only seems like it’s been handled and protected by hackers from other mafia groups.”

Mingi furrowed his brows, “mafia groups? Why will she be transferring money to other mafias?”

Hongjoong pocked his cheek with the tongue, “she doesn’t usually spend such amount of money at once. And according to her schedule, she was pretty much busy with her work-loads.”

“yeah, Amy was always the one asking us if we needed any kind of help and giving us updates on her because she was busy with some events outdoor. Can you give me her schedule for once?”

Yeosang nodded and searched for the schedules Amy sent him and delivered it to Yunho who was quick to open it and read the routines. His creased eyebrows got noticed by Hongjoong, “what happened, Yunho?”

The man shook his head before turning the laptop from Yeosang towards him from across the table and quickly typed something. Everyone was watching his actions and Jongho was peeking at the screen from beside him, “why are you searching these companies?”

Hongjoong raised his hand to let him do his work. After a couple of minutes, Yunho clenched his jaw and shut the screen before turning towards the leader, “I was right.”

“what?”

“these companies: first FACT CHECK enterprise didn’t have any events because they were overseas with us, next ORANGE FATE didn’t held any events for last few weeks and SEVENTEEN has no updates. This only means she didn’t have anything according to her schedules and some same schedules are repeated again and again. Without getting anything solved, everything is appearing to be more puzzled.”

Jongho patted Yunho’s back and turned towards the leader, “we should call Amy and ask her.” The leader nodded and Mingi quickly dialled her number to ask her come to their room. Seonghwa and Wooyoung also returned to their places and waited for her.

As soon as Amy got the call, she skipped towards the room and entered the door with a worried expression. The boys looked at her and noticed her worriedness but Hongjoong asked her not to panic and let her sit on the chair beside Yeosang where you were supposed to sit in other times.

She sat on your chair.

She smirked to herself. Second step achieved, including her in the meetings. First step was already going pretty well when they were calling from overseas to know the daily updates of their place from her---apparently you were busy.

Sitting down slowly, she clasped her hands and Yunho noticed her heavy breaths. They all turned towards the leader when he spoke up, “where were you all these days?”

She bit her lips and tugged her hair behind her ear. She nervously glanced at everyone when Jongho offered her a glass of water. She thanked him and quickly gulped it down, taking few breaths she proceeded, “I-I was working here in the office and then keeping you all updated.”

“where was she? You were not with her?”

“y-yeah I was with her but only when she was inside the building. She was always busy outside.”

“where did she go?”

“the events. I don’t know anything in details because everyday she was late to office, complaining that how tired she is and then going out frustrated. Trust me, I thought you all should know about it because why she will tell me anything.”

“do you know why she needed money? Was she in trouble?”

She paused before glancing at them and then looked down, “n-no. I don’t know. If this was known by me. I would have told you all about it.” She started sobbing and looked up, “I am worried for her. I hope you all find her soon and I will get my friend back.”

Yeosang patted her back and everyone felt bad seeing her cry because she was really close with you and you enjoyed her company so much that they could feel her loneliness and concern when you were missing. She excused herself and Jongho went with her because they didn’t want others to know about the situation yet and she needed someone by her side because of her being oversensitive.

.

.

.

The next two weeks they had done everything possible to reach your location but you were nowhere as if your presence was vanished from the universe. There were no sign of kidnapping because there was no call from any mafia groups, no threats from any rivals and everything was normal and in place without you. It seemed like you never existed but yeah, the employees started asking about your absence and that led to them getting hold of the reality. The news was quick to spread everywhere, to every corner of the city.

Amy became closer to them and she was handling all your works. Them consulting few things with her, of course it was a great achievement for her. At some point, some members were losing hope to find you and becoming reckless. The leader was having a hard time in controlling them but he knew the emotions and conditions of his family because he was on the same boat.

With the passing of days, the chances of getting you back was disappearing and one more thing they were noticing, the strange behaviour of Amy. She was often seen zoning out and flinching to sudden people. They realised she was very traumatized with your disappearance. But a sudden parcel flipped everything upside-down.

Amy was sitting down with the parcel in front of her on the table and them scattered all around the room. Some were in disbelief and some were furious. She was crying and with shaky hands holding and looking at the things which they found out from the parcel.

The leader was hovering on her from the side and glaring, “Amy, What are you hiding from us? Tell me now before I lose my patience.”

She kept quiet and staring at the pictures. You were laughing with a boy, receiving gifts from him, partying at a club with him and kissing and also, you were on a trip for a week with him. It was definitely you, there was no editing and the details were pointing out that you were really not present at home or at office on those days and it only made it clear that there was lot going on behind their back.

“Amy! Speak up!”

She flinched and wiped the tears.

“she was meeting this boy everyday.”

The boy was familiar to them, Lee Heesung from Orange Fate Limited. They often had meetings and events with them. They were not on a term of rivals but were on an agreement of allies because of their head departments.

Seonghwa said darkly, “Continue.” San clenched his fist with every words coming from her mouth.

“she told me not to say you all anything that she was……she was cheating behind you all. She was with you because you all are too naïve that you trust her so much. She threatened me that she would kill me if I go against her. I couldn’t do anything because you all would have never trusted me but I tried to tell you so many times. I am only explaining everything today because its been a month that she has gone missing. But actually, she was planning to run away for a while.” She started weeping and Mingi comforted her. He was hesitant to be so close to her but why he should feel guilty when you didn’t think twice before doing such a thing to them.

They were sick worried for you only to get a parcel, maybe from their ally base that you were with their leader all these times. Yunho scoffed hearing the explanation and Jongho glanced at him before sighing and switched on his lock screen where he was hugging you from behind and both smiling at Yeosang who was behind the camera clicking the picture. A tear drop fell on the screen, just above your face.

He hated himself for missing you.

Mingi took her outside because she was scared and blabbering nonsense and was convincing them that she would bring you back and make you apologize. She explained everything how you were not busy due to workload but because you were going out with your boyfriend. The rage was building inside them with the thought that what more you had done with him other than kissing behind their back. All these past months when you were intimated with them, actually you were just using them as a stress reliever and maybe you were complaining about them to Heesung when you were making love with him.

Yeosang curled his fingers, nails scratching the leather of the chair’s armrest.

Woooyung asked his leader, “Are we going to bring her back? We going to-“

“We are going nowhere. She is not our concern anymore. If she chose to go away, to find love in someone else then let it be.” San growled.

Wooyoung shook his head and with pleading eyes he stared at the leader. He wanted to hear his thoughts and he was sure he won’t agree with San but he was wrong.

“No more discussion on y/n. she was not missing but enjoying her life.” He scoffed, “I wanted to believe that these all are wrong but no. it had to be true. Why had it to be true? She betrayed us. She played with out trust. There is nothing to keep up with this conversation.”

He leaned back into his chair and ordered everyone to leave. They were hesitant to leave because each one of them were sure that if they went off to their individual ways, they would end up doing something worse. But why should they harm themselves? It was you who betrayed them and then ended up breaking their hearts.

If someone had to regret, IT’s You.

Seonghwa halted at the door and looked back towards the leader who was glaring at your picture on the wall, “are you sure we are not going to get her?”

“Never. We are not going to trust her again. Let’s pretend we never met her. And Leave.”

.

.

.

Days went on and turned into months and they all were emotionless as if they only knew their missions and going back home, commanding others and then going back to their own life. No extra conversation with anyone. They even became distant among themselves and Amy was enjoying this a lot because afterall she was the who was spending most of the times with them, delivering the messages and information to them and their individual opinions to each other via her.

Jongho knocked at the leader’s bedroom door. It was noon and none of them went to office building, only Seonghwa went for an hour to check the updates and returned early. Everybody was at home but in their individual room, Jongho glanced at the door between Yunho and Wooyoung’s room. It was locked. In other times, he would often find music blasting from your room and then finding you dancing like a maniac.

“what do you need?”

“the medical kit is empty and I need to treat Yeosang’s wound from yesterday.”

“the ones in the cabinets in the upper rack?”

“nothing.”

Hongjoong sighed and pull off a jacket before exiting his room and signalled him to follow.

“where are we going?”

He stopped and glared, “of course to the base hospital. I definitely know other hospitals will freak out seeing us.” Jongho nodded to his statement and followed him.

Arriving to the hospital, they straight way went to the cabin where its pretty usual for them to appear often.

"Hongjoong?" The said man stopped in his track on hearing someone called him.

It was their rival gang NCT’s member standing in front of him. They never had anything against each other but they were allies with someone who was apparently their enemy.

"Mark. What are you doing here?" Jongho asked in a monotone voice to which the boy before him licked his lips.

"Dude don't think I'm here for any sort of mission. I work here as a part time worker like my leader forced us to keep a normal citizen profile as well, might help us in some ways."

"Why are you saying all these to us? I'm sure your leader won't be happy to see you being friendly with us." Hongjoong smirked.

Mark nodded and glanced at his surroundings expression turning towards them, "I didn't know y/n was in relationship with you all."

"What are you trying to say?"Jongho inquired him and he sighed.

"Hongjoong I heard that you guys were searching y/n but I didn't know how to reach to you guys because my leader strictly told me not to contact any one of you."

"What are you upto?"

"Do you know what happened to her?"

Hongjoong scoffed and glared at him, "don't interfere in our matters. It's all over between us and her so I would like you to get the fuck out of my way."

"So you trusted some bitch?" now it's Mark who was glaring.

"What do you mean?"

Mark held his wrist and dragged him towards a room. "what are you doing?"

"Please come with me. It's for your own sake."

Both of them hesitantly followed him and when he opened the door, they were greeted by the worst view. Their breathing stopped for a moment, they froze with the time. It felt like they were dreaming and oblivious to himself, Jongho stepped forward towards the bed.

IT’s You.

You were sleeping peacefully on the bed.

"What happened to her?" Hongjoong was holding back his tears and clenched his fist. Tears welped in his eyes. He was shocked to see you lying in front of him on a hospital bed with a white sheet covering your body and you were connected to the machines beside you. His eyes followed the bandages wrapped in different places which were visible to his eyes. He didn’t want to think anymore about it. He was clenching his fist that all these months he blamed you and thought that you betrayed them was just to find you in the hospital.

Did Heesung hurt you?

“She is comatose for last few months.” Mark stated, eyes fixed on you.

Hongjoong was glaring at you. Atleast at this moment he thought had it better if you were somewhere enjoying your life rather than being in coma.

Jongho who was kneeling beside your bed caressed your hand, “Why? Why is she in this condition?”

“That day when I was returning from the mission, she stumbled in front of my car. Dude she is not here because of that, I was not driving. Me and my friend were just chatting by the side of the road when she came to us running frantically. She was so scared and covered in blood.” Mark licked his lips and shook his head when he remembered the day.

“who are you? Why did you help her?” the leader asked the question but didn’t glance to his direction.

“I know it’s weird but we are childhood friends. After I joined the mafia gang and for the sake of my leader, I had to keep distance with her so that she might not get in trouble with this dark life but somehow she ended up with you all.” He sadly chuckled.

He continued, “I searched about her when I brought her to the hospital. I found out that she was related to you all and the first thought that came to my mind was that you did this to her. But then when I found that you all are searching for her, I was confused for a while but then gradually came to know the truth. Somebody has tortured her and her body was lacking nutrients and due to the deficiency of iron, she got a stroke.”

“torture? Who did this?” the leader was losing his patient with each word coming out his mouth.

“when I brought her here, she was conscious for few days. Yeah, I strictly told others that they should not let anyone to know about her and Johnny is her doctor. She was repeating some things like ‘Amy please don’t do this’  ‘I want to go home’  ‘help me’  ‘I will go away but please don’t hurt me’. according to the reports she is in vegetative state right now, she got a stroke when one day she was thrashing around things.”

A ring interrupted their conversation. Hongjoong was lost with your view and the words from Mark were sinking inside him. He was still processing that you were in front of him and on top of that, you were in a miserable state.

Somebody tortured you? Amy?

Mark broke his trance and urged him to pick up the call.

“where are you? We need to treat the wound and there is nothing in here.”

“Seonghwa, come to the base hospital and bring others too.”

“What’s going on?”

“Just do what I said. You will know when you reach here.”

“I think hearing some familiar voices or maybe something that can trigger the stimuli can bring her back to senses so I hope for the best. She is attentive to some responses and you all are my last hope.”

Mark patted his back and excused himself. He ordered some guards outside the door not to allow anyone inside the room except few members whom he will be sending soon.

Hongjoong stepped forward and with slow steps, he sat beside your bed. His shaky hands caressed your head, tears fell on you when he planted a kiss on your forehead. Jongho was still holding your hand on the other side and was watching your slow breathings.

“y/n……please wake up.” Hongjoong’s voice cracked and he didn’t know what to say anymore. He was angry, upset, hurt and moreover, he was dying inside. He couldn’t afford to see you in that condition.

They waited for a while. They were whispering so many things and tears flowing down their eyes continuously. They were lost after seeing your condition. The leader was confused that why someone had to treat you in this way when you did nothing in the first place. He was feeling to rip off the machines from you so that he could hug you and shield you from all the negativities that might be lingering around you.

The door slammed open and several footsteps could be heard entering the room when suddenly all the sounds paused.

“y/n?” Wooyoung was quick to run towards your sleeping figure, he pushed aside his leader and hugged your body, resting himself on top of you. He was excited but also confused after seeing you in that condition.

 You were laying pale and fragile upon a sterile hospital bed. Concern etched deep lines of worry upon their faces as they gathered around you, their hearts heavy with fear and uncertainty.

Seonghwa glanced at you and then towards Hongjoong who was not even taking off his eyes from you. “what is this Hongjoong? Why is she here?”

He didn’t reply and when he turned towards Jongho, he stood up to give space to Mingi so that he could stand beside your bed. The youngest was not willing to leave your hand but still others needed to see you as well so he stepped towards Seonghwa, “she is in coma for last few months. Somebody had kept her locked up and tortured her.”

“what?” San glared at him. “what are you saying, Jongho? Who?”

“I don’t know-“

“Amy.” Hongjoong stated the name blankly and stared at Seonghwa. “Are you sure?”

“she was scared of her before she went into coma so that only proves she has something to do with her.”

Wooyoung’s grip tightened around you. Yeosang was beside him who was trying to comfort him but also wishing for you to wake up. He couldn’t believe his eyes that you were in front of him. He could feel your skin against his fingertips. Your faint breathing could be heard and it was the only hope, the only belief that you were with him, with them.

Yeosang caressed your hand and pressed a soft kiss, “y/n, look we are here. Wake up. We all are here to protect you. No one can hurt you. Please look at me, y/n .” he started sobbing and buried his face into the hold where your fingers were getting wet with his tears.

Mingi caressed your head, “y/n… we are here to take you home, doll. Please open your eyes. Try to hear my voice I am here.”

Wooyoung traced his fingers over the bandages and the healing cuts on your face. The beautiful face, the soft skin which always felt amazing against his and he never missed a place to kiss every inch of it. Now its all covered with cuts and bandages. “baby please wake up. Please look at me, talk to me.”

Three of them were crying surrounding you and the rest of them closely behind them were hoping to see your eyes fluttering open and to tell them what you went through. They were cursing themselves for once believing that you left and betrayed them.

They were hating themselves for believing that.

Yeosang pulled back Wooyoung and both of them sat on the couch to the side, the younger one was sobbing in his hold. Hongjoong nodded towards Seonghwa and the older one sat on the stool beside your head and held your hand, the leader stood behind him.

“y/n…can you hear me? Love we are all here for you. Look we found you.” Seonghwa gulped the lump, smiled sadly and continued, “We will get through this together. You need to wake up for me.” Hongjoong placed a hand on his shoulder to encourage him to keep going.

San moved forward, he was observing things from a distance and was silently praying all the Almighty to wake you up, to do a miracle so that he could see your eyes and smile again. Mingi stepped back to give him space and he kneeled beside you and took your hand in his trembling ones, the needles from the iv-drip and other machines piercing your skin and he was holding back the urge to rip that off because it might be hurting you. “Y/n……”

“I can't bear to see you like this. Please, wake up...please…I love you so much" he mumbled and planted a kiss on the knuckles.

“you need to see yourself. You are strong enough to come all these ways alone. You can fight more. You are no more alone, we are here for you.” Seonghwa pronounced every word distinctly so that you could hear them, understand him and atleast process slowly that you were not alone but surrounded by your loved ones. Your family.

Jongho slowly said to them, “Mark told us if we trigger a memory then she might wake up. She is responsive to some stimuli earlier. I don’t know what to do but please do something and wake her up. If not then she will be under more risk.”

“No! she won’t.” Wooyoung shouted and again stood beside you, “y/n, don’t give up on us like this. You cant leave us. I wont be able to live if I lose you. Wake up please.”

Yeosang stood beside him, voice cracking “ you are our heart y/n. just tell me what you need, I will do anything for you but don’t leave me please.”

Hongjoong gulped, “Y/n…remember the day we met, those happy moments which we cherish. I still think about them everyday even after the day you were missing. Please we have so much to do in our life. We love you.”

Mingi’s voice wavered, “We'll be here for you every step of the way, I'll fight this battle with you, y/n. Together, as one...nine makes one family.”

Your index finger moved a little in San’s hold. He was surprised, his breath hitched. He looked towards everyone but others gave him a confused look. he was smiling and holding your hand tightly and glancing between you and them.

“guys she can hear us. Her finger is moving.” His gaze landed on the last one who haven’t said anything after they had arrived. He was fuming but crying and San knew that he could do anything if he was quiet. “Yunho…”

The sterile white walls of the hospital room surrounded him, the heavy air which he breathing was filled with different emotions. But the only emotion that was tugging in every corner was the faint ray of hope.

Hope for you to wake up.

Hearing his name, slow and heavy steps took him to your side. Seonghwa who was still whispering some old happy memories paused and moved back a bit. Yunho stared at your face. The memory of you smiling at him and laughing at his jokes. You acting like a baby and always promising that he would protect you like your big saviour. But he didn’t. he broke his promise. He left you alone to fight and then you were fighting with your death.

He will kill every person who did this with you.

“Y/n, You're my reason to keep going. I…we won't let you go. Stay with me. I love you, Pearl.”

The familiar voices echoing inside your head.

Their voices.

Your family.

Nine makes one family.

You clutched San’s hand but quickly loosened the grip. You repeated the action. Their eyes not leaving a second of your form. Your dry lips parted slightly to seep through some air. The oxygen mask felt like suffocating the air.

Slowly, like tendrils of fog dissipating under the morning sun, consciousness began to seep back into your mind.

Your eyelids fluttered, heavy with the weight of slumber, as you struggled to orient yourself to the surroundings. The rhythmic beeping of the heart monitor echoed in their ears, a steady cadence that anchored all to the present moment.

With a groan, you attempted to shift your body, the sensation of stiffness and lethargy weighing you down like an anchor. Your limbs felt foreign, disconnected from the mind, as if you were a marionette being manipulated by invisible strings. Few deep cuts and wounds stinged, you whimpered at the pain.

As your vision cleared, you became aware of the figures standing by your bedside, silhouettes bathed in the soft glow of the overhead lights. their faces had masks of concern as they observed your awakening. You couldn’t place the names with the faces.

Who are they? Do you know them? Why are you here? Wait…where are you?

You twisted your neck to every direction, an air of suffocation engulfing you and the memory of being locked up, bloods, wounds, cut and crying flashed in front of your eyes.

“baby…” Seonghwa’s voice made you look at him. Your eyes were filled with horror. They will hurt you again. An adrenaline hit you which made you feel to run away and save yourself. You were trapped and you needed to get out. You got rid of the oxygen mask.

“no…no…please don’t kill me…I..” you pushed yourself up, groaning because you felt your lethargic body was heavy with tons of weight, you wanted to move but still couldn’t. you started crying and retreated your hand back when you felt someone was holding it. San left your hand when he saw fear in your eyes. You were confused, scared and tired but still attempted to make a run.

Wooyoung’s voice choked with emotion, “baby you are awake…”  you shook your head and  twisted your body but Yunho was quick to make you still and you groaned when the wound in your waist sent a wave of pain throughout your body.

“please…leave me…I want to go home please…” you were crying and wiggling weakly under his hold.

Yunho was standind straight and engulfing your upper body tightly in his hold to let you cry and shout but he couldn’t let you go away when surprisingly he got you back from the edge of death, “shh shhh…Y/n, don’t cry please. I am here. No one is going to hurt you.”

Seonghwa patted your head, “we are going to take you home.”

“no…no…they  they are waiting for me. Joong…I want to go to him…Hwa…Woo…please please.”

“baby, I am Woo. I’m right here.” You glanced at him. a memory of you fooling around and laughing with him flashed in front of him.

You shook your head and Yunho pushed your head against his chest and placed a kiss on top, “it’s me, Yunho. Love calm down.”

When you didn’t stop shaking, he held your face and made you look into his eyes, he was holding back his tears and still smiled at you, “I am here. Right in front of you. You are safe with me. Your Yuyu is with you.”

You stared at him and your actions slowed down. He shifted and sat on the edge and pulled you closer. “Yunho…” hearing his name from your mouth, he pulled you closer and caressed your sides, lulling you to calm down.

“yes, it’s me. we all are here.”

San placed himself on the other side edge of the bed to caress your back. Even though, they were sad seeing you vulnerable but somehow a relief settled inside them that you were awake. You were with them.

“Calm down for me. will you?”

Hearing his soothing voice, you clutched his shirt. Your tears were soaking it but he didn’t care about that, he just wanted you to not feel scared of them.

They knew it was a burden for you to take in your surrounding after waking up from coma after months. You took deep breaths and he could feel your trembling body calming down.

“Y/n. How are you feeling?” Hongjoong’s concerned voice echoed in the air, reaching your ears. Several nights you spent calling out his name, hoping for him to save you but you were alone. Your mind slowly and slowly settling down and you got a grip of your current situation.

You looked down to see yourself wrapped in a hospital gown.

You were in hospital.

“paining. It’s paining everywhere.” You mumbled and stared at Hongjoong. He stepped forward and softly cupped your face, giving you a warm smile.

“it will go away. You will be fine soon.” He kissed your forehead. Seonghwa stood beside him with a bright smile, his presence itself was giving you a blanket of comfort adding to the warmth from Yunho was hugging you.

Hwa nodded and removed the strand of hairs from your face and tugged them neatly behind your ears, “my pretty baby. Do you need something?”

You moved your head up and down slowly, he urged you to speak, “I..I want water.” He didn’t waste a second, quickly turning on his heel, walked towards the table to get a glass of water. You felt your throat was burning dry and you coughed.

San patted your back, “its okay. Take it slow. You are fine.”

Hongjoong wiped your eyes, “don’t cry, baby. We are here for you. Always.”

Wooyoung sat beside your legs and ran his hands up and down above the blanket. Even though he couldn’t feel your skin against his but he knew you were fine and with him.

You stared at him when Seonghwa gave you the glass, you gulped the water hastily. You coughed when you choked. Yunho and Seonghwa softly scolded you not to rush. Your gaze returned towards Wooyoung, you extended your hand and he intertwined his fingers with yours. Tears fell from your eyes. “you are really here...”

“Yes I am. For you.”

Seonghwa and Hongjoong moved aside to let Mingi and Yeosang in front of your view. They were trying their best to appear happy but they knew with just a blink, you would see them all breaking down. Mingi kissed your nose and gave you a tight hug, “do you want to eat?”

“I don’t know. I want to…go home.” You turned towards Yunho, “please take me home. I don’t want to stay here.” He nodded and wiped your eyes, “shh…we will go okay. We are waiting for the doctor to allow the discharge for you.”

Yeosang cupped your face to bring your attention on him, “we are going to watch movies and we will play tag game. How about that?”

You smiled and their heart melted seeing the small curled up lips, “yes. I would love that but I’m feeling so weak.”

Wooyoung chimed in, “You have to eat a lot to become strong and then we will watch movies and discuss your favorite things. You have to show us your favorite stories.”

Hongjoong chuckled, “You cant make her do that even now. She will still run after you because she always do her best to hide the things she read. But I’m curious too.”

Mingi raised his brows and nodded, “those are in English so even if I get a hold of it. I don’t know how to read them.”

Jongho laughed lightly, “deliver them to me. I will let you know about it.”

Seonghwa shook his head and laughed. The atmosphere was becoming lighter than before and they were glad that you were smiling with them. Jongho kissed your nose, “you need to walk more or you will feel more weak. But you should rest until the wounds are getting better.”

You nodded.

You were always an independent and hardworking woman and that’s how they got attracted to you. Every on the point decisions and single handedly and actively managing lots of works was never a small deal for anyone but they saw you doing it and they were impressed. When you got the offer to join the company, you didn’t know it belonged to a mafia base but what to do, when they told you about it, you were already in love with them. They were always honest with you and respected and even treated you like a queen. Their queen.

 But today, seeing you so weak and vulnerable like a baby was breaking their heart into million pieces. You were hurt, you were scared and traumatized.

A groan escaped your lips when you shifted in your place and Yeosang made you still and Yunho helping you to sit properly, leaning your back to his chest. You turned towards San who was quite all these moments. He was still sitting on the bed close to you and rubbing his hands up and down your body. He wanted to feel you, to make himself belief that he was not dreaming but it’s the reality.

Yeosang with concerned eyes looked towards you and asked, “Are you okay? Where is it hurting?”

San urged you to speak, “tell us baby. Where does it hurt?”

“Everywhere.”

Yeosang, the medic of the group knew he had to take care of you more after returning back home. Yunho massaged your side and it did wonder to relieve some tensions.

Your gaze fell on San’s hand, it was bandaged. Your eyes went wide and you looked towards others to scan them. Why are they hurt? You couldn’t find anything visible on Wooyoung, not even on Jongho but when you watched Yeosang fishing his hand inside the jacket’s pocket. You quickly grabbed it and caressed the bandaged palm. You didn’t notice it earlier.

“Why are you hurt? What happened?”

He shook his head, “nothing major.”

Your other hand grabbed San’s wounded one, “does it hurt?”

“no baby. Calm down. Getting hurt during missions is pretty normal.”

“don’t normalize these things. I don’t want you all to get hurt.” San hugged your side. “I’m sorry…”

“why?” his whisper fanned your ears, tickling you lightly.

Hongjoong frowned, “why are you sorry? You did nothing wrong, y/n.”

“but I am here…”

Wooyoung placed a finger on your lips, “don’t speak. That’s not your fault. You are safe and talking with us. That’s what we want right now.”

Seonghwa patted your head before announcing, “I am going to talk with her doctor…what was the name again?”

Jongho stated, “Johnny.”

“ah yes him. so Mingi and Jongho come along with me, we need to take some medical equipment as well.”

The two nodded and followed behind him before them sending smiles towards you. Your eyes followed them until they closed the door behind them.

“San…”

“hmm… tell me.”

“I don’t want to go to that office building. And you did got some pictures, right?”

Before he could reply Hongjoong interrupted, “no we are not going there anytime soon.” You nodded.

San furrowed his brows, “what pictures?”

“me and Heesung…”

Yunho pulled you closer if its even possible, “why? Why are you asking?”

“do you all trust that? I mean the pictures are real but…”

“but?” Hongjoong just needed some truth and the plannings he already made inside his head would be in action. “tell me y/n.”

“I was drugged and didn’t know what he did. Amy…she used me to get to get you all. She forced me to transfer money, to meet him, and so on. But trust me I didn’t want to do anything. I wanted you all. I wanted to go home. I still want to go far away with you all.”

“calm down, Y/n. we are not speaking about those things right now.” Yeosang shushed you and  Hongjoong clenched his jaw.

He is going to kill her. He is going to torture her till the day she dies of blood loss. He wants to rip her heart out. Does she even have one? He mentally scoffed. He caught Yunho and San staring at him. they both smirked when they saw the leader was fuming.

The leader showed his dirty smirk towards them. They knew the hell was going to break loose for someone.

Seonghwa called Yeosang and asked him to tell others to take you to the car because they got the permission to take you home as Yeosang could manage the rest. He removed the needles and you winced but he was quick to tape the wounds. Wooyoung held your side when you tried to stand up. You felt your head spinning and nauseous hit you. Hongjoong quickly brought a mug in front of your face to let you vomit and Yunho held your hairs in a ponytail and patting your back, encouraging you to take it easy and you will be okay. Yeosang wiped your mouth with wet tissues and San swept you off the ground.

“you are not walking anymore. You need to rest and your limbs are still too weak to make you stand strong even for a second.”

You didn’t argue because you yourself were aware of your condition. As soon as you all left the room, people moved aside seeing the mafia group carrying a girl in their arms. Some had sympathetic look and some with curiosity whispering to each other. You felt awkward under the gazes and you buried your face in his chest. His laugh vibrated in your face and you could hear others chuckled.

Wooyoung ruffled your hairs, “silly.”

Reaching the parking lot, the others were already there. The fresh air hit your face, feeling lively and Seonghwa came in front, “are you okay?”

“I want to stay outside. Please.” You were whining like a baby in san’s arms.

One by one they all entered the car and you were laying with your head resting on Seonghwa’s lap and legs placed over San’s thigh. You pout when they didn’t acknowledge your request. Jongho stared at you, “what happened?”

“I said I wanted to stay outside.”

“didn’t you want to go home?”

You sighed and closed your eyes. Yes, you wanted to return home.

Hongjoong laughed from the passenger seat and Yunho spoke up, “we are going to the beach in front of our house. We will have our lunch there and spend the evening there as well.”

Your eyes fluttered open, “really?”

“yes.” Mingi assured you and joked to make you laugh.

San stroked your legs, “you are our home, y/n. I love you.”

Even if you wanted to go to the house, your home.  It’s fine. Wherever they are, its your home.

They are your home.

“you guys are my home too. My world.”

[thanks for loving the ot8 fics anon <3. I hope you liked this one.]

Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @hwanring @sanwifesstuff @kiwiisnthereoops @kiwiraccoon @hyuukah @kazscara @aceofspadesbiofalltrades @nvdhrzn [open!]

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Sum of All 13

Warnings: non/dubcon, mentions of crime, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Character: mob!Steve Rogers

Part of the mob drabbles au

Summary: you are given an unexpected assignment.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️

You’re tired. Despite your blips into the void, you’re less than rested. You sit back from the table and leave the pencil in the crease of the ledger. You stretch your fingers and yawn. You let your eyes closer and your head wobbles. 

“Sleepy?” Rogers intones. 

You lurch in the chair and glance at him. You don’t remember him returning. He went off to ‘chat with Thor’ but you must’ve been too swept up in the numbers to notice. You nod and fix your posture. 

“A little,” you confess. 

“It’s late,” he stretches his arms as he speaks then rolls his shoulders. “Should probably tuck in soon. You got a lot of work tomorrow. Me too.” 

“Mm, right,” you hum flatly. 

You’re trapped in the tenuous stalemate. Since his confrontation, you’ve been reticent. That’s safest. You still can’t figure out what you did to rile him but you hardly want to do it again. A man like Rogers is not the type you want to goad. If it were up to you, you wouldn’t even be here. Again, that’s just another reminder of his power. You’re here because he says you need to be. 

“I bought you stuff to sleep in,” he goes around the bed and grabs his own bag, flopping it up on the mattress.  

“Oh, thanks, uh,” you slowly close the ledger and stare at the bed.  

Your eyes drift over to the chaise. It’s wide enough for you. It even looks comfy. You get up and approach it, peering into the top of the shopping bags. That looks like pajamas? 

He grunts and draws your attentions again. As he unbuttons his shirt, your eyes widen and your heart spark. Oops! You grab a bag and flee for the bathroom behind him. He doesn’t flinch as you pass by. 

You shut the door and drop the bag. This is going to be so weird. And you thought the hotel room was bad. Him in the bed in just his towel and then you falling out of the shower. It’s a deranged slapstick but you’re the main joke. 

You push open the mouth of the bag and pull out the silk top. The dusty rose fabric is trimmed with black lace. You blink dumbly as you examine the thin straps and fish out the matching bottoms. Okay, are these supposed to be pajamas? 

You search the rest of the bag. It’s much of the same but in various colours. You’re better off sleeping in what you have on. Still, you are entirely unprepared another argument. Just the memory of his chasing you around that room has you jittery. 

You change, reluctantly. How are you supposed to stay warm? You hate being cold. Especially when you’re trying to sleep. You swear, he’s torturing you. For you, he reserved his more sinister practice, you almost envy the man he stomped on the street. At least that was quick. 

You crack open the door and peek out. Rogers lays in bed, one arm bent behind his head, his other hand on his phone as he holds it over his muscled torso. He has no shame as he reclines with his upper half entirely bare. You suppose he has no reason to be embarrassed but you very much do. 

You steel yourself and emerge. You tear your eyes from him and don’t look back. You circle around the bed with one focus in mind. You snatch the pillow from the other side but find it caught on something. Rogers clears your throat and you look up as he stares back. He clings to the corner of the pillow. 

“Whatcha doin’?” He asks coyly. 

You gulp, “oh, I was gonna make up the chaise--” 

“Why?” He prompts. 

“Well, er, I thought--” 

“Bed’s big enough,” he shrugs and yanks, putting the pillow back down. “Unless you think I smell or something.” 

“Oh, no sir, no,” you argue and fold your hands in front of you. The silk brushes your chest and you’re overly aware of how your nipples poke into the cool fabric. “Um...you didn’t happen to grab any sets with pants? My legs are cold.” 

“I dunno. The lady picked it all,” he swipes up his phone again. “Looks like it fits. If you’re cold, get under the blankets.” 

“Right, that’s... smart,” you agree and climb onto the bed. You do just as he says and hide under the blankets. You put your back to him and nestle in. Your body relaxes into the cushy mattress and you yawn again. It’s no big deal. You’re just going to sleep. 

Your head swirls with exhaustion. It doesn’t take much more than a few deep breaths to doze off. You’re grateful for the quick relief. Your body and mind is so addled that the blank void is much preferable. 

You wake to darkness. The kind that blurs like static in your vision. There’s a steady rhythm at your back. Rogers snores lowly between deep breaths. His warmth radiates beneath the blankets and clouds around your legs. 

You peek back at his fuzzy figure. It’s the only time you’ve ever seen him anything less than terrifying, even though you can’t really see him. You move carefully and slide out from under the covers. You tiptoe around to the bathroom and ease the door into the frame. 

You quickly relieve yourself and wash your hands. As you come back out, the snoring continues, assuring you of your successful mission. You climb back into bed and once more roll onto your side. As you pull the blankets up, there’s a dip in the tempo. 

Rogers’ snores fade and catch in his throat. The bed jostles with his movement as he grumbles. You squeak as his arm snakes over you and his heat blazes around your body. He tucks his hand under your waist and nuzzles your hair, puffing hotly into your scalp. 

His arm is like a vice. You can’t dislodge it as you wriggle helplessly. His snores rise again to assure you of oblivion. You clasp onto his wrist but you’re much too weak to fight him. You knew that already but now you feel it completely. 

As you writhe, you let out another high-pitched gasp. What’s that? The bulge flush to your rear has you paralysed as the realisation slowly sinks in. Oh. He’s only human after all, even if to you, he seems immortal. 

You blanch and blink into the dark. The silk isn’t much of a barrier and his own pajama bottoms don’t offer much else. What do you do? You can’t let him wake up like this? You can’t let him know that you felt him. 

Yet if you wake him up by wrench him off of you, that would give it all away. Well, you guess this is your life now. You’re stuck. Trapped with this enigmatic man and his unyielding demands. Even in his sleep, he’s managed to impose his will on you. 

[aimfor-theheart]

Why is it that dc such as r@pe, sa, and incest is totally okay to write about and romanticize but y’all draw the line at racism, fat phobia, and homophobia *talking about the writings creators make, not personal beliefs*? Whats the difference between these things? All of them are hurtful and affect people in real life, so why is everybody on here choosing and picking one and not the other? Do writers on here think that they are not comparable or that one is okay to romanticize and the other is going way too far?

Im just genuinely curious as I have seen this topic be brought up again and again, which has made me realize this and Id like to see it from someone else's pov.

hi! there is a lot to answer and unpack here and i have every intention of doing so underneath the cut. forgive me if this gets long, but you’ve asked me 4 very massive questions that i think warrant detail, nuance, and thought. there is a lot i’d like to say here.

that being said, mind the content warnings and protect yourself.

cw: mentions of rape, incest, racism, homophobia, fat phobia, discourse in general

firstly, i am going to choose to give you the benefit of the doubt in assuming you are actually curious in hearing another side and you are not simply looking to stir a pot or pick a fight with beliefs you have no intention of changing or having an open discussion on. your accusatory tone in the first half indicates otherwise and kindly, i am not an idiot. but i want to earnestly talk to you about this and again, will think better of you than you perhaps have indicated you think of me.

secondly, you do not have to censor words like rape in my inbox. that sort of censorship has become wildly popular because of tik tok and other money-hungry social media that also desperately want to silence people. do you know why you have to censor words like that on tik tok? or words like genocide? suicide? racism? 1. so that they can make money and market and push their squeaky clean algorithms but 2. and perhaps worse, so they can silence victims. if social media platforms and capitalism and the systems of powers had it their way, you would never utter these words again—whether to call someone out for justice or to have an open discussion like this one. i encourage you greatly to think critically about this and how you choose to use censorship and why.

now, to your questions.

to preface, i am interpreting this ask as being anti-dark content in fiction as you state that ALL these subjects harm people in real life. or at least, you are being critical of all dark content in fiction and the way writers engage with them, effectively ‘picking and choosing’ which are deemed acceptable and which aren’t, when they are all hurtful. i apologize if that wasn’t your intention/what you believe, but regardless, i’ll endeavor to answer you.

i personally have drawn no lines about dark content nor spoken about any of these topics specifically really, which indicates to me you have a different narrative and/or are coming from more inflammatory arguments that are always circling fandom lately. in the post i most recently reblogged, i spoke mostly of violence. which, of course, all of those things can be. but i didn’t name one of those topics in particular.

regardless, i don’t believe in the censorship of any dark content in art, but rather advocate strongly for critical analysis on a case-by-case basis. in general, i encourage thinking critically about every aspect of the world around you.

i do not believe that rape, incest, and sa are okay to write about or create art about but racism, homophobia, and fat phobia are not. i believe all of those topics are ones that can, should, and will be explored in the safety of art. all to varying degrees of success, earnestness, impact, and intent. you’re right that these are real things, that can hurt people, and the fictional work about them can have impact on our society that is tangible but the actual art or fiction created is not real. and again, this is all to varying degrees on a case-by-case basis.

art and fiction also historically and massively do discuss these dark content topics and have actively swayed the public’s opinion on matters, whether for better or for worse. throwing away all dark content in art and fiction because it is ‘harmful’ is deeply, deeply dangerous and reductive. a lot of art that engages with dark content actually makes very succinct points about it—i think of vladimir nabokov’s lolita or octavia butler’s bloodchild or speak by laurie halse anderson.

this is where we must exorcise critical thinking. some pieces of work will handle dark content poorly—white saviors making art on racism. men making art about a woman’s experiences that (as you are so interested in) romanticize her pain. etc. etc. and some art will handle it’s dark content incredibly and be transformative, perhaps even revolutionary in how we talk, perceive, or acknowledge systems of oppression, violence, and dark content in this world. some dark content in fiction will have damaging beliefs and effects on society, some will not—we must also look at scope for this, at the writer perhaps, the historical moment, their audience etc.

(for example, there is a significant difference in a main stream male writer, writing of a woman’s experience with rape in a published book in a way that makes it sound romanticized, sold to thousands and thousands of general public vs. a woman using fanfic to explore rape, take control of it, or whatever in a fanfic for a small online community where there are warnings on it. indicating she is aware of its potential damage in a way her male counterpart is not…)

but i still believe in dark contents’ existence in art. of course there is differences between all of these topics you brought up, but i don’t think their differences matter in this answer. i believe in their right to be explored in art. i am talking broadly of media/art here, which i think is the more relevant conversation, but i think you are actually more interested in a much smaller scale of people. ie. fandom. ie. mostly marginalized people in small communities online writing and creating dark content.

people will choose and pick which ones they’d like to create art over and which ones they don’t, which ones they read and which ones they don’t. there’s no ‘hard line’ drawn anywhere. and i can’t control it and neither can you. perhaps you think violence is okay to be explored in fanfic, but racism isn’t. someone else will have different preferences. i do not believe in its censorship.

now, let’s move onto your interest in romanticization and what i think you are more pointing to, which is fandom. you are specifically referring to people in fandom who write about rape, incest, etc. and ‘romanticize’ it—ie. they write about it in a way that is a fantasy. it is perhaps supposed to be horny or sexy. so let’s talk about it.

i must remind you that these topics you’ve brought up (rape, incest, sa) being written are fiction and it is (most often) done by someone marginalized who has either experienced this or is in threat of experiencing this under a patriarchy. i assure you, they are aware of its harm. hence the copious warnings in fandom spaces.

if i can be candid, sometimes i think that people forget how systems of oppression work when discussing fandom and whether dark content being created should be allowed or not.

for example, i sometimes think people who are anti-dark content in fandom believe that a woman or afab person writing a fictional fanfic about rape or sexual violence then influences people to go out and rape people or that women actually like it. when the reality, in fandom spaces, is that rape and sexual violence happen frequently under the patriarchy and then these women in fandom write fictional fanfic in response to cope, explore, take control of, etc. etc.

to insinuate that women or afab people (which fandom mostly is) exploring dark content safely in fiction then causes their own oppression and harm or trauma is rather victim-blame-y to me. fandom exploring dark content does not cause these things to happen in our society….these actions (rape, incest, sa) happen in our society or systems of power and fandom reacts to them in their art by exploring it in dark content. do you understand what i’m trying to say?

it’s not a matter of what is ‘okay’ to romanticize and what isn’t. i do not think the romanticization that fandom does with dark content (ie. my kidnapper actually loves me! or this sexual act that i did not consent to…maybe feels good) is not actually romanticizing but coping because of the systems of power that i described above. and this can be coping with anything—shame of sexuality, shame of fantasies, trauma, fear, etc. etc.

as i said in my tags in that post i reblogged and as plato said, dark content in art is a safe place to explore what would otherwise be harmful and dangerous in real life. it is cathartic. potentially even, a purging.

and even if it isn’t all that—maybe it just is trashy fantasy. it is still playing pretend. it is still fiction and in fandom spaces, it is still most likely being created by a marginalized person. and again, even if it isn’t, we don’t get to censor it. we can be critical of it or wary or whatever, but to censor it, is a slippery, slippery slope. do deem some topics as “acceptable” and others as “unacceptable” is dangerous.

just like kids play pretend where they ‘fight’ or ‘kill’ or ‘kidnap’ or ‘shoot’ each other in games of cops and robbers or heroes and villains, they are safely exploring adventure, dark content, fantasy, tragedy, and higher emotions. adults can do the same in fiction and with adult topics like sex.

and at the end of the day, we don’t get to demand the credentials to do so either. we don’t get to censor them or control them and nor should we be allowed to. i cannot stress enough that i encourage you to be critical of censorship or the absolute disgust in dark content and at those (again—often marginalized people) who engage with it in fandom. i believe it is deeply puritanical, conservative, and dangerous.

you don’t have to like dark content or consume it at all and fandom makes it easy not to with all the warnings and tags, but you cannot control others or police them. nor should you want to.

and at the end of the day, i have some questions for you. you don’t have to respond to this, perhaps they’re just things to think about. what is the end goal here? what is the point in harassing, shaming, attacking, criticizing, or interrogating people in fandom spaces who create or support dark content? do you believe that if it is purged from fandom, it will be purged from our society? if you want it purged from society—shouldn’t you start there rather than in the inbox of marginalized writers in fandom? people in fandom did not create rape, incest, and sa nor do they in their exploration of fiction…they are merely reacting to a world that did create it.

i hope at no point i came off as rude to you, as was not my intention. i intended to stand up for myself and respectfully state my opinions and thoughts on this matter. i’m sorry it got long, but also i don’t believe in being brief on such complex matters. i am a writer who engages critically with the world around me and sometimes, things cannot be made into short, snappy answers. sometimes, we must unpack.

genuinely wishing you well.

[p3sephone]

No escape (Dark! Natasha Romanoff x reader x dark! Steve Rogers)

Summary: Natasha and Steve found a common interest, and that is you. But then you say things like you want to break up, and then escape. So, of course they take you back, and then make sure you understand the hardest way you can't really leave them.

Warnings: past non-con, physical and psychological abuse, manipulation, Natasha is a warning herself, kidnapping, drugging, future non-con implied, dark thought on reader. This is a dark story with dark themes, so minors are NOT ALLOWED, only +18. I don't own these characters.

Note: okay so, I kinda have a little thought about turning this into a serie or at least make part 2. What do you think? Anyway, any comment, like or reblog is truly appreciated. <3 Requests are open!

She didn't know what was going through her mind. It was something crazy what she had just done, and yet Natasha continued to drive towards her desolate destination while your helpless and drugged body was in the back of the seats. She had to admit, she had always been determined and rigid in her decisions, but even she wavered sometimes. Especially when it came to you. But you were so stubborn, what was she supposed to do?

You had left her. You had left her and Steve. She still remembered the conversation from days ago.

"I want to break up."

They were extremely simple words, but coming out of your mouth they were truly surreal. Natasha focused directly on you with an expressionless look, while Steve was already getting more nervous as he started to walk towards you. Natasha had always been the one who talked less than Steve: she was the one more inclined to inflict punishments and make you cry, Steve agreed with her but only when necessary.

If it were up to Natasha, you would have been locked up in that New York apartment at all hours and without the possibility of leaving. She remembered how your relationship was at the beginning: you, Steve and her. It had been born spontaneously, or rather, well, Natasha had perhaps manipulated more than a few things to ensure that the three of you ended up together and that Steve would give her more support when it came to having a firm hand on you.

If only she had had her way, those stupid words would never have come out of your mouth. Steve immediately asked the reasons and Natasha made a face of contempt at you. No, she was not willing to get into that conversation, because there was nothing to discuss: you would not have moved from there, far from them. She had to remind you that, even before Steve, Natasha had seen you for the first time. You were hers. Then the blond noticed you and Natasha didn't mind sharing with him, also because she knew she needed help in the early days because she knew we would get to this point without the right discipline.

"I don't feel good in this relationship anymore, I want… I want the life I had before." Natasha understood how uncertain you were when talking and did what she knew how to do best: manipulate you. She had manipulated you in every way, listing every single thing they had done for you, how well they treated you not only during your daily routine, but also during the nights you spent alone before.

That day she remembered that made you cry a lot, from humiliation. You felt humiliated deep down and somehow you knew that Natasha and Steve were wrong, but your body didn't have the strength to pull back from the long session of suffocating cuddles they forced you to after that argument.

Natasha remembered all of that vividly. Yet, her manipulation, her ways, even her kindness and mercy towards you hadn’t been enough to keep you confined in that apartment. Somehow that adorable head of yours had managed to find a way to escape from them. Steve was the first to discover it, and he felt mostly concern, followed by sadness and anger. Natasha knew Steve: he was a good guy, but if you pressed the right spots he became exactly like her. And Natasha didn’t need the Steve who was kind and adorable to you, she needed the other Steve, the same one you had dealt with one night when you had decided to reject them both in bed and insulted them. You had suffered some bruises and a bad headache, but Natasha remembered how well you had behaved in the days that followed.

Natasha’s mind suddenly cleared. She had done the right thing, she had followed you to that bar and drugged your soft drink, she had finally dragged you away without your dumb friends noticing anything. Oh, she would fix them later, but first she needed to teach you a lesson. She sneered wickedly. She just had to press that button. So, she called Steve. The infamous captain didn't take long to answer, looking all worried.

"Steve, I got her back. I'm taking her to our plan b, that place you know about." Natasha didn't even give him time to speak and continued in a stiff, angry voice. "Do you know where she was? She wasn't in danger. She was with her friends, in a bar and dressed in a shabby way. She had a man on her and she was completely ready for his attentions, you have no idea how she was dancing. She dressed like we always forbade her to, she drank and accepted a bag of… I don't know, but I took her out of there. I did the right thing, didn't I, Steve?"

Natasha didn't need an answer. She had actually lied: you weren't doing any of that, you were just talking to your friends and when a man approached you you politely rejected him like the beautiful little girl you are.

But Natasha had to make you understand that there were consequences if you ran away from them, and Steve would never guarantee those consequences unless she said the things he hated the most.

Natasha thought you were cute in those short, skimpy dresses, it just made her want to rip them off, Steve preferred a more conservative part. Natasha hated it when anyone else paid attention to you, Steve did the same. Natasha liked you when you were drunk because you couldn't remember what she did to you during that time, Steve… well, he might be lying but he actually liked you too, even if with more guilt.

"I'm coming." Steve didn't give Natasha time to say anything else, he had already hung up. The red-haired woman looked at your poor, still helpless and unaware figure in the mirror. You had no idea what was waiting for you but Natasha did, and she was going to savor every second of it. You'll never leave her again, she'll make sure of it.

[heart2beom]

a lost bet!

pairing: frenemy!beomgyu x reader

genre: fluff, comedy

summary: you lose a bet to beomgyu and out of everything you'd think he'd ask of you -- money, to pour freezing water on yourself out in the snow, hell, you thought it'd be more likely for him to ask you to jump off a cliff and survive than telling you to take him out on a date.

word count: 2.2k

notes: cheesy stuff but if you read it till the end, a heart is always appreciated :') if you read it and liked it, please reblog ˃̵ᴗ˂̵

there are people who would be described as two peas in a pot, the half of the other, siblings from another mother -- the idea that they complete each other, that they work so well together that they must be of the same thread.

to describe your relationship with beomgyu, those metaphors would never even have came up in the light of day because you guys just don't work. you like what he likes and he likes what you like. you do what he does, and he does what you do. for heavensake, you've known each other since highschool and you still ended up in the same dream university, in the same dream careers, in the same fast food job! and that is exactly why you don't work. the arguments that fester from being just a little too similar got extreme back when you were teenagers, terribly extreme you couldn't even blame it on hormones.

girls who'd be interested in beomgyu every three weeks would come up to you at the randomest times to ask if there was anything going on between you two and the first couple girls, your friends would die of laughter because of how inaccurate the assumption was. "her and beomgyu? beomgyu with the long hair? him and y/n? the y/n that's standing next to us right now?"

it was safe to say that after a while, the entire engineering major knew you and beomgyu would never happen. and you were content with that.

that is until that day happened, the day you lost the bet.

you were feeling lots of things before he'd decide on a what you'd do - fear, fear was a big one.

"hey, go easy on me." you reluctantly said quietly.

"huh?" he put a hand behind his ear, "what'd you say?"

it was embarrassing enough that you couldn't complete the software in time when you're known in the major for being the fastest, but it was even worse to give beomgyu the satisfaction of you being scared. you already caught a smirk on his face, fucker.

"i said...go easy on me you prick."

"okay okay here, since you're begging, i'll give you a deal." he folded his arms, acting like he was thinking of this on the spot. "i'll go easy on you if you don't ask any questions about my dare." and that was when you knew that he had this planned out - you took the bait anyway, just of the small chance you might avoid jumping off a cliff.

"okay, i accept the deal, whats the dare?"

"take me, choi beomgyu..." he was elongating every vowel and you'd hate to admit it but every time he does it, as annoying as it is, it does manage to do its job and keeps you on your toes to want to know what he'd say next.

but the long pause that day was way more annoying than usual.

"just say it!", you yelled.

"on a date!" he yelled immediately in response. "jesus christ you're so impatient."

beomgyu saw you open your mouth to say something and he anticipated it so he quickly shut you up with a finger on your lips.

"no questions, remember?", you rolled your eyes and snatched his finger off your lip. "here are the rules. one, you're paying for everything-"

"broke ass." you cursed under your breath and he caught it.

"who's working three shifts again?" well, that got you quiet. "two, it has to be the best date i've ever been on. like spectacular, jaw dropping, 5 star restaurant. you know i'm a wanted, highly desirable man. and three, if you break the rules, you'll have to try again. but hey, i trust you'll get it on the first try. i'm going to go easy on you."

and that is how you find yourself on the 9th try of trying to woo beomgyu with a date and finally get the dare over with. i'm going to go easy on you? bullshit.

the first three times, it was aggravating to know that you failed and had to go on another date. the next four to eight times, you viewed it as another assignment to overcome - like a game? that period was ambitious (hello, you literally drove four hours for one of the dates once) so when even those failed, you entered your nine times to how many the fuck you know times. you've never went on this many dates with someone you weren't even in a relationship with.

and by now you'd figured that beomgyu was just freeloading off of you. that asshole. you would totally do something like that..

like it was the devil's calling, beomgyu came through the door of the desserted cafe that you part timed at.

"hey! welcome to bist-- beomgyu." you said his name grimly, staring at him walk over to your register.

"oh my god, i did not know you worked here! fancy seeing you partner!"

"beomgyu, you literally used to work with me-- you know what? no. i just took the last order. we're closing the store."

he looked at his wrist, like he was reading a watch but when he dropped his hand down, there was indeed, no real watch.

"it's seven on a thursday, you aren't fooling me."

you groan dramatically like a child, frustrated. "what do you want beomgyu? i can't afford to hear your voice one more time this week, i'm serious i think i need to get myself checked out before i'm driven to insanity." you mumbled as he looked up at the menu, his iris going left and right trying to decipher which one would be the cheapest, and not taste like total shit. "can i get a...hmm...this is a lot of options..."

"a triple shot soy decaf vanilla latte with whipped cream?", you filled in.

"no not--wait, hold on. that sounds really good."

"because it is good." you said rolling your eyes playfully, this time.

"is it cheap?"

"the cheapest." you said, cracking a smirk. it was times like these where you remember that you and beomgyu are still the friends part of the frenemy title you both chose to adopt.

a more genuine fond smile warmed up on beomgyu's face, because he had the same exact thought.

"well its not technically the cheapest--" he started.

"don't ruin the moment beomgyu." you said heading to the backroom.

"i'm just saying, you were being deceitful! also there was no moment!" you heard beomgyu call out. secretly, you let out a quick chuckle to that.

when you finally got him his order, you expected him to leave...but of course, you thought too highly of him. because there he was, elbows on the counter, sipping his coffee (milkshake) really..really loudly. it was like his sole purpose was to annoy the fuck out of you.

"do you want me to direct you to a table mr. choi?" you said in your fake nice voice sarcastically as your back was turned from him to wash the tools that you used.

"y/n i have a question."

"answer mines first."

"when is the next date--i mean, like, your next, um..attempt? try? what are we calling it?"

you exhale, you knew he was going to mention it.

"it's today. surprise!" you turned around with a terrifying toothy smile, doing jazz hands.

"you just decided this last minute didn't you?" you shook your head, still keeping up a smile. "also stop smiling like that oh my god."

and the smile was dropped. "okay, so what if i decided just now? you know, the cheapest dates are the best dates."

"literally nobody has ever said that." he said, taking another sip of his drink, shaking his head slowly disapprovingly.

"no, yeah you're right i don't know why i just did." you said, very much perplexed those words came out of your mouth -- you'll call it your first stage of insanity.

"look, i'm going to be completely honest, i don't think you'll ever top the paris hot balloon date with that cute foreign chick."

you scoffed, coming closer to the counter with your arms crossed. "um pfft, i thought we collectively, we as in the whole world by the way, agreed that you made that date up."

"you're the only one who thinks it didn't happen, i literally showed you pictures! and it's not that hard to believe, i am universally hot stuff." he shrugged, and you rolled your eyes. "wait hey, i think i still have the pictures, let me show you."

his eyes were narrowed, scrolling on his phone.

"okay okay, enough. also don't call yourself hot stuff again." you covered his phone screen and he looks up at you confused. "lets say it did happen.."

"it did happen!"

"...if you knew i wasn't going to top your extravagant paris date, why'd you even add the second rule?"

for the first time, beomgyu didn't have an immediate response. he was quiet, way too quiet.

"look, you can just tell me you were trying to freeload off of me." beomgyu looks taken back, his face scrunched up, so you add more to clarify, "i would be pissed but you don't have to be all secretive about it. i can get over it if you pay me four hundred dollars in cash--"

"let's say i was freeloading off you, which by the way, i should've thought of that--"

"correction, you were freeloading off of me."

beomgyu ignores you. "you know what, i just thought of something. there is one way you could top the hot balloon paris date."

your interest was piqued but you try not to show how your ears perked up, and clear your throat. "what is it?"

despite your attempt to seem disinterested, when beomgyu motions to bring your head closer so he can whisper something, you don't hesitate.

"i don't know, maybe it'll be too hard on you...like it takes a lot of courage--"

"just say it!" you yelled impatiently.

"say i liiike you beomgyu-ah~" he said with what you think is a pout, and top of that you'd bet a hundred bucks that he was fluttering his long lashes too.

you pull your head away. "beomgyu."

he shrugged. "i'm giving you a very easy task, take it or leave it."

you exhale, its true. it isn't that bad. "i'm not doing the aegyo though."

"thats the entire point! just don't do it at all then."

"oh, okay. bye, it wasn't pleasant seeing you beomgyu, as always." you waved him away and start untying your apron to leave your shift, but beomgyu was still there. because you've heard the third groan in a row.

you, however, didn't notice that he came to the back in the register area until you felt his hand touching your struggling ones that were trying to untie your apron for the past..three minutes now.

you dropped them to your sides, feeling a little awkward at the sudden proximity.

"were you actually going to close?" he asked as you felt beomgyu trying to untangle the knot.

"no that was a lie, i'm leaving because my shift ended."

"huh. you know i was about to apologize for bothering you. and i never apologize."

"who said you weren't bothering me anyway? in fact, you've been bothering me this whole month more than normal."

you looked back to beomgyu, "why'd you stop? can you try to untie it faster?"

"alright alright, jesus."

the rest of the time that he spent untying the knot, it was quiet. oddly.

"done. i have to go now though, homework and stuff." he said backing away.

you stopped him by holding his wrist back. "hey, are you mad? it's kind of weird, i've never seen you mad."

he looked back at you with a raised brow. you rolled your eyes, correcting yourself. "okay, well i've never seen you mad this month"

you let go of his wrist because hes fully turned to face you, with his arm crossed.

"maybe, maybe i wasn't mad because i didn't see hanging out with you to be the biggest nuisance in the world."

"well..you're mad now."

"say i like you."

"huh?"

"you don't have to do the aegyo, i'm exempting it because i am a very nice friend."

okay, so now you're lost. you don't know what's going on, at all. but hey at least you'll get a perk of ending the dare!

do you...want to end the dare?

okay, what the actual fuck. why are you having that thought?

"i like you beomgyu-ah." you mumbled reluctantly in the most monotone, robotic voice ever. and his previous sorta serious face morphs into a fit of laughter.. KNEE slapping laughter.

"god you should've--you should've seen your face!" he said pointing at you while he uses his other hand to hold his stomach. like an elementary bully ad.

and the fit of laughter continued.

"was that whole im mad act fake? you're...ugh." you groaned. another day, another beomgyu being a total dick.

you took beomgyu by the wrist again to push him out of the back. "bye! it's time for you to leave!" you said loudly.

"alright alright i'm leaving--ow!"

you had to go through seeing him laughing all the way to the exit door, but hey, at least he was gone. you sigh, relieved.

but then you hear the ding again.

"i like you too by the way" beomgyu shouted out. and then left again.

typical annoying, irritating, choi beomgyu. leaving you to make an analysis of what he meant by saying that... for the entire night.

[thehusbandoden]

You Flinch During an Argument -Midoriya Izuku

A/n: Finally it's done T^T. Literally I think this is attempt 6 and I still don't like it compared to the others </3

Izuku angst is definitely not my strong suit :')

Hope you enjoy it <33

Info: angst to fluff/comfort | 589 words

Warnings!: Mention of arguing, flinching, and crying. Please let me know if I miss any <3

Dabi | Hawks | Todoroki Shoto | Bakugo Katsuki | Midoriya Izuku | Shigaraki Tomura | Aizawa Shota | Amajiki Tamaki | Kirishima Eijiro | Shinso Hitoshi

Izuku's world crashed as he saw you flinch away from him, body trembling as your hands stayed close to your chest.

That's when he noticed that Full Cowling was activated. Horror shook Izuku to the core as he stared down at his activated quirk.

'Y-y/n I- I-" Izuku muttered, eyes tearing up as he looked at your shaking form.

"I-Izuku can you just- let me be alone please- I.. need some time alone."

Izuku shakingly nodded as he made his way to the kitchen, tears falling down his face as he slid to the floor, staring at his arm lividly.

~~

After texting Izuku that you were going to a friend's house, you got your phone, wallet, and keys before heading over to your best friend's house; Mina Ashido.

~

Stepping out of the car you make your way to Mina's apartment, knocking on the door.

"Coming~!" Her cheerful voice called, already starting to calm you down.

As the door opened Mina immeditely noticed your mood and smiled at you knowingly, pulling you into her apartment before shutting her front door.

"Did you and Midoriya san get into a fight?" Mina asked, pulling you to her couch before heading towards the kitchen.

"Yeah.. I put myself in danger to help him and he got really mad, we argued and then his quirk set off- and I flinched. I wasn't scared of him per say, but I was frighted by the sudden appearance of his quirk.. I told him I needed to be alone, and then texted him that I was going to a friends' place." You whimper, snuggling into the decorative pillows of Mina's couch.

"Aww I'm sorry! Are you okay?"

"Yeah.. I just thought some space would be good and wanted to talk to a friend.."

"Well I'm all ears! Talk to me all you want~!"

"Thank you.. what are you doing in the kitchen by the way?"

"I'm making cookies for you~!" Mina giggled, causing you to genuiningly smile.

"You're too sweet." You smile, yawning at your sleepiness.

"You can go to sleep if you want to~. I'll put the cookies away. Well there's the couch, you'll always have a spot in the spare room, and if you want to you can sleep in my bed so you're a lot more comfortable."

"Thanks.. I'll just sleep here.. it's so cozy."

"Okay, sleep well~!"

"Mhmmm"

~~

It was around two in the afternoon when you made your way back home, already feeling a lot better due to Mina's brightness and input.

Walking in, you were quite suprised to see Izuku asleep on the kitchen floor, tear stains marking his freckled cheeks.

Leaning down to his level, you shake him gently, not wanting him to be even more sore for work.

"Zuku baby, you need to get off the floor." You coo, brushing his fluffy hair away from his face before stroking his cheek lovingly.

"Five more minutes.." Izuku grumbled, causing you to giggle softly.

"Okay, you can sleep more but you need to get to bed, or the couch at the very least."

"Cuddles?"

"Yes cuddles!" You giggle, causing Izuku to peek up at you, looking up at your face through his lashes.

"Wait... last night I-"

"Shhh we can talk later."

"But-"

"Please, just cuddle me."

~

After your nap you both had a discussion about the argument, and talked about you risking your life civilly.

After figuring everything out you shared a long embrace, lots and lots of kisses, and close to a thousand 'I love you's.

Series' masterlist | Izuku's masterlist | Main masterlist | Navigation

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Reblogs help spread and therefore support my work immensely, but any support is appreciated <33

Do not copy, repost, nor plagiarize my work. Ask before you translate or use my work in any way minus reblogging.

[lexawoah13]

CHOISOME PART 5

MASTERLIST

Part 4

FINALLY I AM BACK WITH PART 5! IT’S A LOT SO BRACE YOURSELVES AND ENJOY 🫣

Thank you so much for being patient with me! 🫶 this took a lot longer to write than I thought it would. I’ve had a lot of stuff going on in my life and it’s been rough! I hope it’s okay and you can enjoy it!

If you like this series please like and reblog! That helps so much for others to see it ❤️

Soobin x Yeonjun x Beomgyu x afab!reader(older)

Warning: threesome, double penetration, triple penetration(I KNOW but would I have called this Choisome if this wasn’t going to happen🙃) drinking, oral sex, ass play, cliche truth or dare, possessive Soobin, y/n Is older than them, this probs sucks so ✌️ also not really proofread

The look of pain on your face alerts Soobin, stopping his stroking and making sure you’re okay. He knows his friends are watching you to but it’s not the same, they’re too into it to really tell if you’re okay. Soobins eyes watch every hint of movement you make. Face contorting slightly, fist squeezing, every breath that hitched in your throat. He knows you’re okay but it doesn’t hurt him any less. Wanting to comfort you, he stands, by your side with a couple of his long strides. He pulls your hair back, maneuvering himself behind you to rub your lower back. “You’re doing so good baby. So so good” he whispers in your ear, his encouragement helping subside the discomfort from the stretch and pull.

“Binnie.,,” you whine, looking up at him, head tipped back as he supports you.

“Hi bunny” he whispers against your temple, punctuating with a kiss.

That little kiss helped you relax, allowing gyu to finally fill you with his fingers, twirling them around and scissoring inside you slightly. Feeling him rub certain spots pulls soft moans from you

“Looks like you’re all ready princess”

“‘m ready gyu”

Beomgyu begins lubricating himself, lining up with you. Yeonjun is attached to your nipple, Soobin still at your side.

The moment Beomgyu starts to push in a gravely ‘fuck’ leaves his lips in a breath. Your mouth opens, face contorting in slight pain laced with bliss. Tipping your hips up, Beomgyu thrusts deeper, and deeper. Grunts and moans filling the air around you. “Fuck y/n-ughh-feel so good” picking up in pace

Soobin and Yeonjun start to jerk their cocks from the sight. Both jealous that they aren’t buried in you right now. “God bunny you’re doing so well” Soobin praises while Yeonjun calls you “such a good girl”.

You turn your head to see them, clenching around nothing and whining at the sight.

“Want you, more… pleaseee” reaching to them

“Fuck y/n stop squeezing so tight or I’ll cum” gyu gasps

“Really want it that bad huh pretty?” Yeonjun coos, coming forward and pushing the hair out of your eyes, hard dick right in front of your mouth. Licking out your tongue to taste him again. Whining when you can’t quite reach him. “Mmm please Jun”

“Anything you want sweetheart” he lowers to peck your lips before turning to Beomgyu “flip her ov-“

“No, her pussy is mine!” Soobin cuts him off

“Oh come on Soobin you can’t be serious, look at her”

“No she said it, she said she’s mine” gyu slows down, and pulls out, waiting out the argument

“What the fuck Soobin you can’t just claim her! this started because she wanted all of us, not just you! Plus you just heard her she asked for me!”

Just as Soobin is about to snap at Yeonjun you grab is wrist “please Binnie. Just this once. They started this together, let me finish it with them”

You beg him “then I’m all yours”

Looking deep into your eyes he can see the desire from your fucked out state, but he can also see you mean it.

He kneels down to kiss you softly, “okay” he whispers

Standing, He turns back to Yeonjun “you can’t cum in her, you understand?” Stating firmly

Smirking Yeonjun pats him in the shoulder “good boy, give her what she wants”

“Cum in her and you’re dead”

“Alright chill, I won’t “

“You better make this worth it hyung. Don’t disappoint her” Soobin smirks, returning to you to help get you situated. Sitting up, Yeonjun sits next to you “you sure about this? You want me, not Soobin?” Suddenly doubting himself

“Junnie, it’s been the 3 of us all along. I’m sure” you say before pushing him to him back and crawling up him.

“Coming gyu?” You ask over your shoulder

Beomgyu is behind you in a flash, not needing to be asked twice. Kissing his way up your spine to let you know he’s returned. Yeonjun attached to your chest nipping and kissing you all over.

Looking to Soobin you mouth ‘thank you’ to him, knowing he isn’t thrilled about this. After all you did just tell him your his. But it feels wrong to not finish things this way with Beomgyu and Yeonjun.

He nods, bringing his lips to yours, “anything for you y/n. Whatever you want” and you know there’s a tinge of hurt behind his words.

You pull him in again as he leaves your lips “I am yours Soobin, always have been” saying the last bit so quiet he barely hears you, staring deep into his eyes before your kiss him again.

Yeonjun and Beomgyu are oblivious to your quiet confessions, and Yeonjuns slender fingers make their way down to your swollen bud of nerves, running them through your folds before he gently circles your clit.

“You ready pretty?” He nibbles at your neck, rutting his dick against you.

You unlock your lips from Soobin’s, studying his face to make sure he’s okay.

Cupping your face in his large hands, rubbing his thumb across your cheek, Soobin gives you his knee weakening smile and nods.

“Shes ready”

You feel beomgyu rub his tip up and down, letting you know he’s first. Rubbing your cheek he slowly pushes into your rear. Groans rippling from deep in his chest at how good it feels. Grip tightening on your hips, he bottoms out reaching deep inside.

He feels you tighten around him as your back arches, head falling back to your shoulders. No sounds escaping your parted mouth, silently moaning.

“Fuckin’ hell y/n”

Yeonjun is lost staring up at you, at your neck particularly. How it’s so tight thrown back in pleasure. He feels you panting, your hips and stomach moving up and down against him. He needs you. Now.

looking to make sure you’re okay. He slowly lowers you onto him, feeling you clench and pause at the…discomfort? You wouldn’t call it painful, but it’s not particularly pleasant at first either. You have never felt so full in your life.

“Breathe bunny”

Soobin whispering softly in your ear centres you, releasing the air your didn’t know you were holding.

“You’re doing so good for them, yeah?” He says

Beomgyu adds “yes princess, such a good girl for us. Taking our cocks so well” lowering you further onto Yeonjun, moaning at the sudden feeling of your warm walls swallowing him further.

“Almost there sweetheart just a little more” Yeonjun breathes, tucking loose hair behind your ear so you will look at him. He wants to see your face as he bottoms out in you. The face you make being full of not only his, but Beyomgyus cock also.

He makes his final thrust up into you, moans and sinful noises ringing through the room from the three of you. Because not only were you completely full, cocks hitting you in just the right spots, but you can feel both of them rubbing against each other.

Both men overwhelmed by the sensation.

Soobin, unable to peel his eye away from the three of you, spiraling at how turned on this is making him. He thought he would want to kill his fellow members but, the sight and sounds of them fucking you were making him rock hard, aching to be in you. Unable to stop himself from firmly squeezing his cock and rubbing himself desperately up and down.

Hearing his breathy groans, you rip you sights from Yeonjun below you, to be met with the head of Soobins dripping head. Wanting to taste him again, you desperately whine.

“Fuck you’re such a good girl bunny. So fucking good”

“Such a good slut for us baby” Yeonjun coos before popping a nipple back into his mouth, teeth grazing your hardened bud, as Beomgyu tightens his grip on your ass. Their words and actions making you squeeze even tighter around their lengths.

Soobins glorious cock is making your crazy. All you wanted was to taste him. To feel him fill your remaining hole with his thick, leaking cock. Watching him jerk off to you getting absolutely ruined by his best friends was making you even hornier. Desperately leaning forward as far as you can, you extend your tongue to lick the precum beading off his flushed pink head. Stretching as far as you can, only to come short.

The needy whine you make makes him chuckle.

“You that needy bunny? Two cocks aren’t enough for you?” He teases spreading his glistening pre all over his tip

You can’t help it, your desperation taking over. Nodding and whining in a frenzy.

Soobin is just as desperate, but has to make sure your want him to.

Placing one knee next to Yeonjun’s head to come closer, the other bent next to your face, cock so so close to your mouth you reach for him. But he grips your chin and makes you look at him

“You sure Y/n? You sure that’s what you want?” Rubbing his thumb over your bottom lip.

“YES! Fuck Binnie give me your cock! Wanna choke on it” You all but scream. The three men moan at your plea

“Jesus Christ princess you’re incredible” gyu groans picking up the pace, meeting Yeonjun as they hit you deep inside you together. The thrusts push your forward, and Soobin wastes no time filling your open mouth with aching length. Moaning around him from his taste and the assault your insides are taking from Beomgyu and Yeonjun.

Each thrust pushes you in a different direction. Numbness filling your limbs as fatigue and pleasure wreck through your body. Your eyes roll back, your juices leaking out soaking their dicks. Drool dripping down your chin as Soobins cock fills your throat.

With the loss of control, Beomgyu grabs your wrists, pulling them behind your back. Keeping the perfect position to fuck into you.

Eyes blurry with tears from Soobin hitting the back of your throat, while being so close to cumming as Yeonjun sucks and nips at your tits, circling your clit as both his and Gyu’s tips hit your spots.

Soobin getting a full view of your fucked out face can’t help but be mean. Gripping your hair tight on top of your head he picks up his pace, nose hitting off his pelvis, gagging from how deep he is. When he stops he plugs your nose, cock still buried deep enough to stop your breathing. “Stupid little bunny had to be a greedy whore didnt she? One cock wasn’t enough? How do you like choking on my cock now? Is this what you wanted bunny?”

Your screams are muffled around him as your eyes pop open wide and nod feverishly. Getting light headed from lack of air.

“You look good like this, a choking, teary eyed mess”

“Nothing but a cock sleeve for us arent your princess?” Beomgyu adds, slapping across your ass.

“Perfect cock slut for us- fuckk- so good for us baby” Yeonjun taunts as he grips your throat pushing where he can see Soobin filling your throat watching his best friend fuck your beautiful face.

Starting to turn red, Soobin releases your nose and pulls back to let your breathe. But that only lasts a couple of seconds.

All three fuck you at their will. Forceful and so fucking good you’re already creaming around them.

“Aghhh fuck y/n” Yeonjun moans as you clamp around him. He leans up, sucking and nipping at your neck and chest leaving even more purple bruises behind. Whimpers and cries escaping from your full throat at how fucking amazing this feels. So overstimulated and full but so fucking good at the same time.

Soobin lifts your head by your hair to look at you. Eyes glassed over, pupils blown and unable to focus. Tears and drool rolling down your face “so fucking pretty like this baby, you’re a fucking goddess you know that? Our beautiful fucked out goddess” he praises you, moaning around his heavy cock in your tongue.

Thrusts no longer have rhythm, and are scattered signalling they are all close.

“Come Y/n. Come for us” Yeonjun demands. finally commanding what you’ve been wanting all along.

“Fuck yes baby please!” Soobin grunts picking up his pace again, roughly bringing himself to finish.

“Y/n god please” beomgyu whines, spanking you roughly and breaking the tightly wound band holding your orgasm back “COME” he yells at you.

You break in every which way. Fire running through your whole body as you scream out your bliss. Pulling off of Soobin and convulsiving around the other two as he watches you come undone, finishing himself off. Shooting his creamy white cum all over your face and dripping down your chest from beomgyu pulling you back further. The sight is godly and he could almost cum again just from watching his cum drip down your swollen breasts and torso.

Yeonjun, watching you get covered by Soobins cum and you milking his cock for all he’s worth, bring him to finish next. Thrusting up into you, iron grip on your waist, until the last possible second where he lifts you off, pumping his cum all over the outside of your cunt.

Beomgyu is using every bit of will power he has to last. He needs to make sure you finish, because he would hate himself if he ruined this orgasm for you. When the others finish he pulls you back against his chest, feeling you go limp as all your strength has been used up. His last couple of thrusts carry you through the surges of your orgasm, whrn he finally cums painting the walls of your pulsing opening white with his warm seed.

Completely numb and tingly, you feel yourself lose consciousness. Falling completely limp into Beomgyu. He holds you close, as the other two men get closer to make sure you’re okay.

“She’s completely spent” Gyu softly says, pushing the hair out of your face

“Can you blame her though? We’ve been pretty rough on her.. she’s like a sex goddess though that was insane” Yeonjun says, getting up to grab a cloth to clean you up

Soobin kisses you on the forehead, lovingly staring at you “yea, she is… guys I-“

“we know Soob. We know you’re in love with her” beomgyu cuts him off “you need to talk to her”

“Yeah Soobin, I’m pretty sure she feels the same for you” Yeonjun adds on

Beomgyu delicately places you in Soobins arms as Yeonjun cleans you gently

“We’ll go grab some food and stuff” beomgyu stands up looking for his clothes

Yeonjun looks over your face, and smiles softly “take care of her” he says looking to Soobin

“I will… I love her” he whispers the last part more so to himself as you curl into his chest and sigh in contentment.

Yeonjun smiles and ruffles his hair befor he grabs his clothes and joins Beomgyu to grab some recovery items for you.

Soooo what did you think? Did we like it? Do you think I should continue into part 6 with some Soobin x Y/N fluff, talking about how they feel about each other, some aftercare?

Let me know 🤭

KTHX BYE ✌️

[saursoob]

can you do a bf!yeonjun apologizing after an argument? please make it super fluffy!

❤︎ |i love you much more| ❤︎

yess ofc anon!! idk if this good enough but pls enjoy 💗

warnings: y/n is a overthinker, yeonjun refers to y/n as “pretty girl”

@saursoob reblogs r okay! please don’t repost

you and your bf yeonjun haven’t been hanging out much as of recently now that he’s been traveling for tour. you’ve been very supportive of his job but its been lonely. when you first started dating it was bearable but the more you got used to him in your life that started to change.

but you can imagine how ecstatic you were when you found out he was he finally coming home. you decided to get ready, putting on some light makeup even though it was late. you and yeonjun had been together for a over a year now but you still wanted to look your nice for him as its been a while since you’ve last seen him. as you were getting ready you received a text from your bf, yeonjun: “y/n im not going over today im super tired. ily” you pouted at his text feeling upset that he wasn’t coming but more confused if anything “he always comes over and “ily?” why didn’t he say the whole word?” ultimately you decide to push your thoughts away and respond back. y/n: “its alright. rest well!”

-

the next morning you text him to hopefully make up for the previous day of him not going to see you. y/n: “junnie come over today! i miss youu”

yeonjun: “i have a busy schedule today but ill try.” your heart sank at his cold laced tone. why is he being so weird? if hes mad at me he should just tell me. you sigh and put down your phone, scrolling on netflix to watch something to make you feel better

more under cut!!

hours later you hear a knock on your door, you secretly hoped it was your boyfriend even though you’re slightly mad at him. “hey” he says while you open the door, it was him. he goes in for a hug, barely even touching you when he does but you didn’t say anything.

“why are you here?” you asked him. silence filled the room as he went to lay down on your couch, taking out his phone and mindlessly scrolling on it. you looked at him in disbelief, aggravated on why he was acting like this. “yeonjun, are you mad at me or something?” you tried to keep your voice composed but failed to, your words coming out shaky.

“why would i be mad at you?” yeonjun says, not fully paying attention to you still looking at his phone.

“i dont know? yesterday you didn’t come over to see me which you never do, didn’t even bother to call but instead texting me and not even saying i love you properly?! and now you are here but you don’t even hug me properly either?? yeonjun, you were gone for so long leaving me here to miss you but you don’t even seem like you’ve missed me! ” you got so angry that unknowingly you started tearing up.

yeonjun immediately focused all his attention to you, standing up to face you. cupping your face with his hands and wiping a tear with his thumb, “darling, please don’t cry. im sorry i didn’t even realize that i didn’t hug you properly.” he says in a soft spoken voice while going in to hug you tightly.

“yesterday i was so jet lagged that i just went home ready to knock out for the night. i know this is no excuse for it but work has been so tough lately, tour’s, dance practice, schedule, interview appearances. its just a lot but please y/n i’ve missed you so much.”

he says while softly lifting your jaw for you to look at him “i’ve missed you more than anything, so please don’t think that i didn’t.”

you answer looking away from him, “yeonjun, could’ve have slept here.”

“i know and im sorry babe i wont do it again i promise.” he says leaving a peak on your nose

“lets make up for it right now, yeah?” yeonjun leads you to your bedroom, laying down first and patting on his chest signaling for you to lay down on him, you do as he signaled, getting comfortable on his chest.

“you know this isn’t gonna make up for it choi yeonjun” to which he chuckles at, “mmm i know, what if i make you breakfast in bed in the morning lovely?” you cant help but light up at his comment “you’re staying the night?! you don’t have any schedules in the morning tomorrow?”

“nope” he smiles looking down at you “you did say i have to make it up to you, right?”

after a while of being in the comfort of his chest and hearing his heartbeat yeonjun suddenly sighs deeply, playing with your hair. “you have no idea how much i love you y/n.” making you smile in a sleepy haze

“ i love you much more, yeonjun.”

!! reblogs are vv appreciated !!

ENDD!! im actually so nervous to post this since im not that confident in my writing but if you enjoyed thank you so much 😣 <33

[goatcheesecak3]

YOU SHOULD WRITE FOR ADAM MORE. PLEASE. OR DEAN, YOU ARE SUCH AN AMAZING WRITER FOR BOTH OF THEM

AAAAAA SUNNY I LOVE YOU💕💕💕💕

Here's some dating dean hcs because I have MANY thoughts on this man

His love language is acts of service. He tends to view most relationships as transactional, he will rarely do things for others without expecting something in return, so you know how big of a deal it is that he does things for you without ever expecting anything back. When you're with Dean you can forget about carrying your own bag, paying for your own food or even rolling your own cigarettes. Dean wants to do it all for you, to show you how much you mean to him.

Your relationship is fast paced and intense. Dean doesn't ever feel casual emotions, he can't just love you, he's hopelessly, irretrievably in love with you. It's borderline obsessive, he's never felt unbending loyalty to anyone but himself before, but when it comes to you, he would do absolutely anything for you, and he makes sure you know that.

With the epic highs, come the epic lows too. Arguments with Dean are heated, frenzied and unpredictable. Dean loves you so much that it's almost painful for him, and he finds it hard to believe that anyone could ever love another person so ferociously, let alone you loving him with that same intensity. Most of your arguments stem from this issue, he's terrified that one day you'll turn around and tell him you don't love him, so sometimes he starts a fight just as a way to get it over with and give you an out.

The arguments become less frequent when Dean finally begins to understand that love isn't just something you feel, but something you do. No matter how strongly he feels love for you, he knows the feeling alone isn't enough to maintain a relationship; he has to improve himself, he has to compromise, instead of just worrying that he isn't good enough for you, he has to do everything he can to be good enough for you.

He thinks you're the smartest person he's ever met. The way you articulate your thoughts, the way you remain rational and logical without letting your emotions get the best of you (something which he struggles with) are traits that he really admires. He could listen to you talk for hours, just in awe.

You're the only person he cries in front of. Dean's been through a lot, and late at night sometimes he just has to let himself feel. He's beyond thankful that he doesn't have to go through that alone anymore, every "Shhh, sweetheart it's okay", every night you've stayed up, rubbing his back and holding him while he cries, helps him more than you can ever imagine.

He loves just goofing off with you. Skipping lectures to go plinking (shooting cans and beer bottles etc), watching horror movies and trying to make eachother jump, or just observing the rich kids from a distance and laughing at their ridiculous designer clothes.

Kisses are his favourite thing EVER. He's not one to shy away from pda either, he pretty much always wants to make out with you.

He's a big spoon for life, he thinks you're the most adorable thing he's ever seen and he loves just holding you tight and protecting you as you go to sleep.

He's willing to change for you, he no longer just coasts through life seeking cheap thrills. With you, he found purpose, and despite all his flaws, he's gradually getting better.

A/n I'm half asleep while writing this so ignore any grammatical errors etc, I cannot brain right now.

Requests are open! Check my pinned post for details

Check my pinned post to find my masterlist too :^)

Replies and reblogs are greatly appreciated :^))))

[ratsandfashion]

@SHOFARSOGOOD SORRY TUMBLR WOULDN'T LET ME REBLOG???

BUT

OH MY GOD YOU HAVE OPENED THE FLOODGATES HNNNGH

Okay, so you're in France in the 1760s. Specifically, you're a peasant in the Gevaudan province.

AND SOMETHING IS KILLING THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYBODY

It's described as being "like a wolf, yet not a wolf" and these people, they're shepherds, they see wolves ALL THE TIME, so if they say this thing WASN'T a wolf, I trust them. But the problem is, we don't know WHAT it was. Descriptions vary a LOT, probably owing to the people who saw it being terrified and trying to get away, combined with a typical "game of telephone" deal where the thing got changed each time someone told someone else about it, combined with people just lying and SAYING they'd said it, combined with the fact that if it was an exotic animal (more on that later) people just had no idea what they were looking at. But some fairly consistent traits are that it's BIG, it's got a long tail with a tuft, and it's a reddish color with a black-striped back and white underbelly.

Sounds like a tiger, right? That's a common theory. A lot of nobles kept zoos of exotic animals that peasants would never have seen before and have no reference for, so the fact it's a big furry predator on four legs was probably enough to make it "like a wolf but not a wolf" if it wasn't a bear (and we don't think it was a bear because people also knew what bears looked like) Some good candidates are a tiger for the aforementioned reasons, a lion (tufted tail, some drawings have a mane), and a hyena (wolf-like, has the bite force necessary for decapitation, as many of the corpses had the head removed from their bodies, another unusual feature)

So this thing just fucking runs around the countryside savaging peasants. And they can't do much about it because it's illegal for peasants to have guns. If you ever have to make an argument for the right to bear arms, bring up the Beast of Gevaudan, gurantee no one will see that coming!

Some peasants made do with what they had though. A group of boys managed to save their friend with, iirc, sharpened sticks, though they did not escape unscathed. One had his cheek basically TORN OFF, and as a result the king funded his education for the rest of his life, which was a big deal for a peasant boy who wouldn't ordinarily receive it. And a girl, Marie-Jeanne Valet, successfully fended it off with a homemade spear (she described the beast as a large dog) A statue still stands in her honor today.

Speaking of the King, the news about all this was reaching him. So he started sending out hunters and dragoons (a type of cavalry that would dismount to fight) to get the wolf. But, to no avail! They couldn't seem to kill it. And when they DID finally get a great big wolf, as well as a female wolf with unusually large pups that had traits not normally seen in wolves (ex: double dew claws, which some large dog breeds have, indicating wolfdog hybrids) the killings stopped for awhile. . .and then started again.

This became one of the first international news stories; other countries thought it was HILARIOUS that the King of France and all his men couldn't handle one little WOLF!

Eventually, it was brought down for good by a local hunter named Jean Chastel. Legend sprang up that the beast, which was said to be immune to ordinary bullets, had been felled by a bullet which had been made by melting down a medallion of the Virgin Mary. At the time, the fact it was killed by a holy icon was what was significant, as some people thought it was a werewolf and those were seen as creatures of the Devil at that time (rather than innocent people afflicted by a disease/curse as in modern media) but the fact the medallion was silver may be the source of the modern "silver bullet" myth which isn't from any real werewolf folklore and seems to be an invention of Hollywood.

The royal notary examined the animal after death and recorded in what is known as "The Marin Report" that "This animal which seemed to us to be a wolf; But extraordinary and very different by its figure and its proportions from the wolves that one sees in this country." and details a "monstrous head", unusual body proportions, aberrant morphological characteristics, and unusual fur colors. The report also includes the dental formula (number of molars, number of canines, etc) of the animal, which does seem to indicate a canid of some type. The report is preserved in The French National Archives.

So, this wasn't an unsubstantiated cryptid. It was pretty darn meticulously documented.

Unfortunately, photos didn't exist then, and by the time the corpse was taken to Versailles, it was so rotten and badly decayed that no one wanted anything to do with it, and it was in all likelihood dumped somewhere like garbage. I reckon everyone was just happy to be done with it.

While the beast was dead (or at the least, the attacks ceased) the speculation never has. Some people think it was just a big wolf or wolves, but like I said, I think these people knew what a wolf looked like. Other people think it was a wolfdog hybrid or family of such, which would account for the large size, unusual features, and lack of fear of humans. This, I think, is the most likely option. The escaped exotic animal is the next most likely imo; I remember that there's no records of. . .it was either of any such zoos themselves at the time or of no escapees, but like, if I was a noble and my tiger got out and it was eating people, I don't think I'd say anything.

Then there's more fringe theories. The werewolf thing, of course, but also the idea it was a conspiracy against the king, or some big political plot, often involving Chastel (the hunter who shot it) or his son, or that it was a serial killer dressed in animal skins, or a serial killer that had trained a dog to hunt with him as his method of killing. I...kind that pretty unlikely, just because I've never heard of a serial killer doing anything like that, like using an animal is just not 'intimate' in the way serial killers seem to like to be? But I'm no expert.

My PERSONAL favorite Unlikely Fringe Theory is that it was a mesonychid. See, some descriptions of the Beast claimed it had hooves. And while no modern carnivore has hooves, there is a prehistoric class of carnivores called mesonychids who are often described as "wolves with hooves" and whose appearance---monstrous head, longer tail---do match up pretty well with a lot of accounts.

Now, is it likely that a breeding population of huge prehistoric predators just...survived THAT long into the present and just NEVER got noticed by humans except this ONE time, and no other remains to indicate their survival have ever turned up? Yeah, no. But I really like the idea! That and the werewolf are my FAVORITE options, but in all likelihood it was a wolfdog(s) or escaped exotic.

[luwritesomething]

Hello ! Can you please write Mickey Altieri x reader when his girlfriend is hanging out a lot with Randy and he gets jealous, please?

Mickey Altieri Heacanons: Jealousy.

Warnings: Maybe there's swearing?? It's me, so…, jealous themes (ofc)

Edited?: Like always, no.

Reader's pronouns: Not stated, gender neutral (reader gets called ‘darling’ twice)

Summary: Jealousy with Mickey Altieri 

Author's note: first of all, thank you for requesting! i decided to do this in form of headcanons because i thought it would be more dynamic, so at first it starts with jealousy in general and then shifts to randy. hope you like it <3 also gif is not mine, but look how pretty he looks !!!!!

criticism, comments and reblogs are always appreciated! requests are open, especially for scream! hit that anon button and tell me your ideas.

in the scream fandom, i write for billy loomis, stu macher, mickey altieri, chad martin-meeks, mindy martin-meeks, tara carpenter, anika kayoko, laura crane

i think mickey is a rather complicated boyfriend with the whole jealousy thing.

not because of him being very jealous but because he’s a mix of chill but still jealous.

but it think that’s normal, though,,,

he’s very protective, so he’ll probably always watch you to make sure you’re okay, and he likes keeping you under his sight.

but he knows jealousy can ruin things pretty quickly so he always tries to cool down and think how he would feel if the situation was the other way around.

that usually does it, but mickey starts getting petty if he starts considering you’re being too friendly to a certain person for a long period of time.

“oh, you need help? well, why don’t you ask them for help, uh, darling?”

it amuses you, more than anything, because it doesn’t come from insecurity. it’s straight up jealousy and envy when you spend too much time with any other person, full stop.

but at the same time, mickey isn’t stepping up unless you look really uncomfortable with whoever you are.

if he steps in, it might just end in a physical confrontation because, again, these are really serious situations.

he never lets his jealousy become an argument between you two, that’s childish and possessive. it probably has only ever happened once or twice and he has apologized profusely because he truly does trust you.

KNOWS when someone just wants to take advantage if you or something, and he’s absolutely telling you. what you do is out of his hands.

because mickey is the type of boyfriend who is very aware he has no say in what you do or you don’t do. that’s very present in his mind, all the time.

if you purposely try to make him jealous WHILE DATING know that he hates you (and so do i) and will soon dump you.

he really isn’t fucking around that, he wants to trust you, have you trust him back and be loyal (the bare minimum).

however,,,

if you purposely try to make him jealous before dating, you better get your ass ready since two can play the game and he’s flirting with every single human being who blinks and breathes.

he’s so competitive, so are we surprised?

his eyes are always on you, no matter who you are with. mickey always watches, and he does it out of love tbh.

he never asks, though, if he doesn’t know the name of the person/people you’re with.

he just magically finds out and will casually drop the name of whoever he thinks you’re spending a lot of time with to see what reaction you have.

“i didn’t know you knew taylor, mickey. you should have come and said hi!”

the person he probably gets more jealous of is randy, hands down.

he loves the dude but mickey actually sees randy as competition when it comes to you.

he’s charming, funny, with great taste, intelligent, and you do get along… if you met mickey in the first place, it was because of randy.

it doesn’t make him insecure or anything, he just thinks he’s an actually plausible option for you.

so if you start getting very close to randy very often, expect a moody mickey.

because he’s obviously not admitting he’s jealous.

he never does admit verbally that he’s jealous of anyone, you just find out because of the things he says.

“mickey, is that jealousy i’m smelling?”

“yeah, you wish, darling.”

or

“are you seriously jealous?”

“i don’t get jealous.”

with randy is a different type of jealousy, though, because he does get moody.

“are you gonna tell me why you’ve been this bitchy lately or…?”

the look he gives you after you confront him — he’s so fucking baffled that you’ve noticed something’s going on, because mickey thinks he’s so subtle about it when he truly isn’t.

“first of all, rude. second of all, what are you even talking about?”

he finally gets petty when you ask again.

“leave me alone and go over to randy’s, mm?”

you literally burst out laughing at that, because that’s his way of admitting he truly is jealous. 

he actually gets a little annoyed that you’re laughing, which makes him purse his lips and stare at you with a no-nonsense face on.

you reassure him randy and you’re just friends.

“thankfully, you’re the only nerd i seem to like.”

“what do you mean thankfully???”

you end up making him laugh and making him forget his dumb jealousy.

although you occasionally tease him about it because it will never not be funny to you that he actually gets jealous when he’s the only one that you want.

<3

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

the girl next door 19

Warnings: this fic will include elements, some dark, such as age gap, manipulation, chronic illness, noncon/dubcon, coercion, and other untagged triggers. Please take this into account before proceeding. It is up to curate your online consumption safely.

Summary: A new neighbour moves in and upends your already disarrayed life.

Author’s Note: Please feel free to leave some feedback, reblog, and jump into my asks. I’m always happy to discuss with you and riff on idea. As always, you are cherished and adored! Stay safe, be kind, and treat yourself.

This lewk but silverfox

You stare straight ahead, to humiliated to look at the man next to you. You haven't since you woke up. 

You wallow in confusion, trying to piece together the void in your mind. It's all blank after the shower. No matter how much you try, it just makes your head hurt. 

"You didn't eat much. You feeling okay?" He breaks the silence as he comes in view of the hospital. 

"Yeah, not very hungry," you murmur.  

"You know, I read the insert with the pills, that's one of the side effects. Plus it can really knock you on your butt. Must be what happened last night." 

"Please," you beg; just the mention has you squirming. 

"And fatigue can be a symptom of depression so that might also be why--" 

"I'm sorry," you hide your face in your hands, "I don't remember. I don't want to talk about it." 

"I told you, sweetie," he slows and finds a spot among the lot, "we just slept, alright? I just wanted to keep an eye on you otherwise I would've let you have the bed." 

You curl your fingers and dig them into your eye sockets. He doesn't get it. She doesn't hate him. 

"Please," you sniffle and sit up, "don't tell my mom.' 

"Don't tell--" he hits the button to kill the engine and unbuckles his seat belt, "there's nothing to tell, right?" 

"Yeah, but if... if she thought..." you stammer as you swipe away a glimmer of tears, "she's sick. I don't wanna m-make it worse." 

"Alright, sweetie," he reaches between the seats and squeezes your shoulders, "it can be our little secret." 

You nod a gulp. Your chest racks with the air trapped inside. He lets his hand brush down your arm. 

"Sweetie, it's okay. I'm going to take care of you. You and your mom," he retracts his touch, "now let's go say good morning." 

You undo your belt and get out as he opens the back door. He takes out the balloon and flowers he stopped to pick up on the way. He had you sign the card but your mom will know it wasn't your idea. You're too stupid to think of that. 

You offer to help but he waves you off. You go through the visitor's entrance and up the elevator. He approaches the nurses' station and greets them easily. He makes you feel worse for how sure he is of himself. The world isn't scary to him. The world doesn't mind him being there. 

As you get to your mother's room, you stop short. He nearly collides with your back and he chuckles. 

"Here, honey, you take the flowers," he offers the bouquet, "she's going to love them." 

You turn and take them without argument. They're your only defense. You enter slowly and Steve follows. 

"Morning, honey," he chimes past you, "surprise!" 

"Emf, Steve?" She gurgles as she turns her head one way then the other, "oh, Steve, you're here." 

"Just like we promised," he goes to her and kisses her forehead then gives her the card, tying the balloon to the bed rail. "Brought some flowers." 

"Shouldn't have done all that," she's back to her act, smiling for him as she sits up with an exaggerated effort, "I'll be coming home." 

"I know, just wanted to brighten your day," he shrugs, "we were real worried. Both of us." 

Your mother's eyes skim in your direction and narrow, "she didn't give ya too much trouble, did she?" 

"She's perfect, hon," he assures. "Really, she's been a lot of help. I was in a state and she took good care of me." 

"She did?" She wonders.  

You try not to react. He's lying but you wouldn't want him to tell the truth. You just keep your mouth shut and come forward to offer the flowers. 

"Here," you say, "love you, mom." 

She takes them with a brittle silence then quickly resumes her preening, looking at Steve as she inhales the scent, "oh, so lovely." She lowers them and rests them on her lap, "you didn't happen to bring coffee? I'm dying for a cup." 

"Ah, gee, you know, it slipped my mind," Steve says, "guess there were bigger things." 

"I'll... I'll go to the cafeteria and get some," you offer and feel around your pockets. You forgot your change purse. Shoot. "Erm..." 

"Here," Steve reaches in his back pocket, "it's on me. If you can grab me an orange juice and something for yourself. Thanks, kiddo." 

He hands you a folded twenty from his wallet. You take it reluctantly and glance at your mom. Her eye twitches but she keeps a placid expression. You turn to leave as she quickly forgets you. 

“I missed you so much,” she whines. 

“I know, honey, but we should talk...” 

Those words chase you out the door and prickle the hair along your neck. What are they talking about? He said he wouldn’t tell her. 

You can barely see straight as you walk the halls, losing yourself several times before getting to the elevators. When at last you’ve reached the cafeteria, you struggle to remember what you’re there for. You grab the coffee and an orange juice and pay, keeping the change clutched tight. 

You head back up, lightheaded from the motion of the elevator, and float through the halls, unseen and unbothered by the bodies around you. You feel invisible. Sometimes, you wonder if you’re even a part of the same world. 

You stop outside your mom’s room, the door open. 

“Steve, it’s a lot...” she mutters gloomily. 

“Trust me, Holly, alright?” 

You cough and step through. You put the coffee on the table near your mother’s bed and turn to offer Steve his juice and change. He accepts them as they both stay quiet, almost as if they’re not telling you something. 

“Thanks, kiddo,” he speaks at last and tucks the money away, “you didn’t get anything?” 

“No, it’s okay.” 

You glance at your mother, expecting a gripe. ‘Good you don’t want her spending all your money’. She just reaches for the coffee, a tick in her cheek as she finds no sugar or cream with it. Another mess up.  

“Well, I’ll go get the doctor, have him check you out and see if you’re ready to go,” Steve claps his hands. 

“Sure,” your mother hums and pops the lid off her coffee, “you’re a life saver, honey.” 

- 

Steve drives you and your mother home, a layer of exhaustion settling around all of you. You don’t think your mother got very much sleep at the hospital and your own did little to nip away at your constant sluggishness. Even Steve yawns as he pulls onto the avenue and pulls into your mother’s driveway. 

You get out as he helps your mother from the front seat. You trail them up the porch and skirt around to open the door. Even as you try to be helpful, you feel like you’re in the way. 

Your mother’s hand is shaking pretty bad as Steve gets her into the recliner. You watch from the archway and wring your hands. It feels like forever since you’ve been home. The break in routine has you restless. 

“I’ll stick around for a bit but I got a buddy stopping by later. I’ve been putting it off and he’s starting to get pushy,” he explains, “but you can always call me. Kiddo,” he stands straight, hands on his hips, “you got my number? So you can text.” 

“I don’t have a phone,” you frown. 

“I’ll call ya,” your mother insists over you.  

“Okay, well, I’ll make you something to eat before I head out. Did they give you your meds at the hospital?” He asks. 

You see your mom hesitate. She’s never been one to be coddled. She always told you to back off but with him, she can’t break the facade. Her cheek ticks and she flutters her lashes, her tremour worsening. 

“Oh, Steve, I don’t feel so well. Do you have to go?” She moans. 

“Honey, did you take your meds?” He repeats more firmly. 

“Ugh, yes, okay?” She huffs and drops back on the recliner. “You don’t have to remind me I’m sick.” 

Steve crosses his arms and tilts his head, “I’m making sure you don’t get worse. Don’t talk to me like that.” 

“I’m sorry,” she heaves and hides behind her hand, “I’m so stressed and it’s just... horrible to not be able to stuff on your own.” 

“Doesn’t mean you get to take it out on everyone else,” he reprimands. He sounds mad. You’ve never heard him like that. “Look, I gotta get moving around here. You think about what we talked about.” He turns and winces as he sees you, almost like he forgot you. “Kiddo, why don’t you go chill out? It’s been a long morning.” 

You nod and quickly retreat, thankful for the opportunity to be alone. 

[gettinshiggywithit]

!Dating Tenya Iida HCs!

Scenario:-what would dating tenya iida be like?

Pairing:-Iida x gn!Reader

Genre:- fluff

Type:-headcanons

A/N:- for @tooloudarts I hope u like it bestie!

{look for the moot mayham masterlist in the fanfics masteistlink for the rest of the requests!}

Dating tenya is kinda different

Not in a bad way ofc

Hes just kinda awkward at first!

You two had been besties for your 1st and 2nd years and you could definitely say you’d grown close as close could be

Seeing tenya without you and vice versa was always a little odd.

And everyone could tell that you had a thing for eachother!

So in your 3rd year,you bit the bullet,thanks to courage bestowed upon you by denki sero and mina, and asked him out on a date.

And later that day he asked you to be his s/o!

He was sweating bullets lemme tell ya! And although ppl woulda thought yall went from 0-100 REAL Fast,you knew that goin thru the talkin phase would be kinda stupid,especially when you already knew everything abt eachother!

Datee nights are always perfect.thoughtful and well executed

This man is basically the kunikida of MHA he has a plan for almost anything and mann will he execute it to a T!

Iida isnt really big on pda but if he knows you are ,he tries his best to be okay with it.if you initiate it hes mostly okay but he wouldn’t really do anything other than a little hand squeeze on his own.

The iida family aren’t particularly judgy or concerned about your family back ground(they know that if someone managed to make tenya fall in love,really in love,they were the right choice) but they were however adamant on the fact that he treat you right

Tensei himself gave tenya a good talking to the day they had you over for dinner,and even though you were having a nice chat with his mum,you caught a few words of tenseis lecture.

When it comes to gifts they arent really big or flashy. Flowers he saw out in the school garden or just little things that remind you of him are his little gifts to you

Tiny trinkets that mean a lot!

And if anyone ever even triesss to mess with you,this man will defeat them WITH THE POWER OF LOGIC AND FACTS HE WILL REASON UNTIL HE HAS DEFENDED YOUR HONOUR!

And honestly it gets you kinda flustered to see him so worked up,you had the situation under control but he really wanted to help you,so you just watched from the sidelines as his hand kept cutting through the air as he made his point,and I think we all know he wan that argument 😎

Dating tenya iida is a unique experience and honestly he makes your life just a little bit sweeter just by being HIM.

please dont repost my work here as your own on any platform all rights belong to me except that of the characters used,their right belong to their respective owners.but these stories? mine.

feedback,likes,reblogs and comments are so very appreciated tbh :’)i hope you enjoyed and ill catch ya next time!

Comments & Reblogs w/ tags >>>>>>>>>>>likes please

Taglist open for anyone interested!

[companionjones]

Demo-Dog Danger

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Reader

Fandom: Stranger Things

Summary: You’re dating Steve Harrington. At the end of season 2, you’re attacked by a demo-dog. Joyce and Hopper take you to the hospital.

Warnings: Hospitals

*******

    “Hey, baby. Just do me a favor, and keep your eyes open, okay?” Steve gazed down at you cradled in his lap as you struggled to keep consciousness.

    “It hurts, Stevie.” You flinched a little when one of his tears hit your cheek.

    The kids, minus El, and Nancy and Jonathan stood nearby. No one knew what to do to help.

    Hopper’s truck pulled out of no where, and skidded to a halt. Joyce hopped out of the passenger seat, and helped a weak El out of the back and to her friends.

    Jim was already pissed as he jumped out of the car. “I thought I specifically told you guys to stay at the house?! Take El back. She needs to rest.” He stopped cold when he saw that Steve was holding someone. “What happened?”

    Mike and Lucas and a few others opened their mouth to explain, but Steve beat them all to it as Hopper lifted and carried you to his car. Steve informed, “It w-was demo-dogs.”

    Hopper made no argument when Steve and Joyce joined him and you in the car. The group knew very well of your relationship with Steve, and frankly, Jim needed Joyce’s company. He and Joyce had become like parents to you because your actual parents were never really around.

    You fell unconscious about halfway to the hospital. You woke up when the sun started peeking through the blinds in your room. You were the only one awake. Steve, Joyce, and Hopper must’ve stayed with you through the night.

    “It’s only been a few hours.” Joyce was the second awake, alerting the others. “Don’t worry, sweetheart. The doctors said you’re going to be fine after the bear attack.” She winked.

    “You’re good?” Hopper asked, getting out of his chair.

    You smiled weakly. “I’m good.”

    “Good.” He quickly leaned down and kissed your forehead before turning for the door. “I gotta call to check if any more of the kids are gravely injured.”

    “I’ll come with you,” Joyce called as she followed him, offering you a comforting smile before they exited.

    With you and Steve alone, Steve sprung out of his chair to kiss you over and over again. He then left your lips to pepper kisses all over your face.

    “Steve, Steve!” you weakly giggled when he took a second to stop. When he finally parted from you, you softly cupped his cheek. “I’m glad they patched you up, too.”

    He took your hand on his cheek into his own hand. “Don’t worry about me. Worry about you.”

    “I wouldn’t have made it if Dustin’s demo-dog hadn’t’ve saved me.”

    “Hey, don’t say things like that,” Steve admonished, “Worry about yourself, don’t worry about what could’ve happened.”

    “That’s a lot of criteria to follow for my worrying,” you smirked.

    Steve chuckled, “Yeah, yeah, yeah. Make fun of the guy whose #1 priority is you.”

    “What about the kids?” you teased.

    Steve sighed, exasperated, “I have a lot of #1 priorities, okay?”

    You laughed, despite the fact that it hurt your wounds. You were just happy you could still get on your boyfriend’s last nerve.

*******

Author’s Note: Thank you for reading! Fill up that heart and reblog if you liked it. I would also appreciate a comment, if you have the time. If you would like to read more, check out my masterlist. Have a nice day, night, or whatever time it is for you! <3 <3 <3

[llatimeria]

previously i had known you to be against incest and other similar kinks, but because of a post you reblogged earlier, can i assume you are now in support of it? it would be nice to have a clear answer in case it was somehow a mistake but as it was reblogged directly from op (who is open about their views on that) i find that harder to believe.

incest is bad, and incestuous abuse is absolutely life-ruining for a lot of real people, including people i care deeply about, and i personally am just not into it. it's less about me being "okay with incest now" (i am still. not, really) and more like... half "i have bigger problems than what strangers on the internet jack off about", half "i no longer trust random callouts that demonize vulnerable people, and even if I did believe every single accusation implicitly, the callout reaction really doesn't help with any of it; it doesn't help the victim at all (if anything, it can put them in harm's way by publicizing their abuse, which usually leads to them getting even more abused), it neither punishes nor rehabilitates the abuser in any meaningful way, and seems to only benefit the angry mob who get to jerk off to how cool and morally pure they are", and half "those in glass houses shouldn't throw stones".

basically it's a complicated subject. if by asking if i "support incest", you mean "would i molest my family members, or knowingly support people who have molested their family members" then the answer is "jesus fucking christ, absolutely not". if you meant "do you think incest is a fine thing to jack off to" tbh no not even that, i still think that's not especially cool. there's a reason it's taboo beyond just "i don't like it". it really, genuinely hurts people*. if you meant "do i have such a strong aversion to even the slightest possibility of being on the same side as an incestuous abuser that i'm willing to participate in a reactionary hate mob that, for all i know, was rallied up by transmisogynists in order to ruin some poor woman's life" then the answer is yes, i guess? accusing lgbt people, especially trans women, of being incestuous pedos is a a time-honored tradition of many homophobes and transphobes, so i don't really want to be a participant in that anymore.

*but then again so does half the shit i like. like, i'm into vore. vore in real life would literally kill people. not to mention that some people read furry stuff as bestiality - it's not, but there's no one authority on what is or isn't evil. no one person or group decides this, and we all have to decide for ourselves where our boundaries are.

there IS also an argument to be made that not caring about it, or at least not reacting with overt disgust and violence, helps normalize incest, which might make incestuous abuse more common or make it more difficult for survivors of abusive incestuous relationships to speak out about their experiences, which would Obviously Be Bad, and I don't really have a good rebuttle for it tbh. the ol' "fiction doesn't affect reality" battlecry is still kind of bullshit on the face of it, fiction demonstrably affects the way people behave. but also people aren't entirely mindless robots that are programmed to simulate whatever they find on e621? most of us have higher brain functions that allow us to do things like consentually negotiate morally gray kinks so people can have fun playing pretend without hurting themselves or others, and i don't really think the people who are selfish enough to genuinely molest members of their family for their own enjoyment are going to be especially influenced by porn? real abuse centers around predatory power dynamics more than literal sexuality and kinks anyway. the venn diagram isn't a circle or two circles, it's a venn diagram, you know?

tl;dr i can't tl;dr my thoughts on this subject you're just gonna have to read the post.