#okay i'm embarrassed now
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*inhale* PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE
Do chris king headcanons.
Wow!!! I was wondering if I would receive an ask about characters that aren’t my own! Whee! Thank you, anon! :D
I might have listed some stuff that was actually said in the game… I have a bit of a hard time remembering.
Chris is good at cooking because he went through a “Cinderella and her stepmother” type of situation. His parents forced him to do all the work around the house (cooking, cleaning, etc.) and treated him badly, favoring Aria instead.
Chris quickly “fell in love” with MC because they were the only person who showed attraction towards him. (Besides Aria of course LOL)
Chris gets very clingy and often asks for reassurance from his partner, maybe to even a suffocating degree…
Chris loves kids and wants to have a family of his own, but couldn’t have any in his marriage with MC because of financial issues. Also, I can imagine MC not liking children since they’re already such a blatantly mean person LOL
Chris was a virgin until he met MC.
Along with having a huge dick, Chris also has a nice big ass that even Marcus stares at sometimes!!! (I’m not sorry XD)
Chris always moans his partner’s name during sex, says “I love you” to his partner when he’s nearing his climax, and likes to cuddle afterwards! (I say “partner,” not MC, since MC was awful at fucking Chris apparently...)
Chris is perfect at being both a submissive bottom and a dominant top. Although he’s usually really gentle and loving during sex, he can definitely get really kinky and go rough too!!
Sorry, I wish I had more. 😔 But hopefully you had at least a bit of fun reading~
#wowee! I really feel like I'm participating in the fandom now! I feel like a teenager again!#(old man)#okay i'm embarrassed now#i'll probably draw the chris and marcus thing someday LOL#chris king#tddup#till death do us part#mrboogerlip asks
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:D
#I've been wanting to draw something like this#thank you for giving me the excuse#nuziv#vuzin#murder drones#my art#I'll get to the other requests eventually!#(except for the crossover and oc requests i'm so sorry but I don't do those right now)#again there are 3 requests that I really want to combine#I'll probably draw other things in between though#okay i'll just tag all the ships#nuzi#vuzi#envy#they give me so much joy#!!!#both uzi and v are going to die of embarrassment later btw#especially uzi
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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can you please, please relate? i’m not holding up
[transcript]
#the one without a custom voicemail is asa :')#i always write casper posts when i'm mentally unwell 💀 but now i'm doing okay overall so reading this again makes me feel.......#almost like i'm oversharing somehow#and i get embarrassed#but i guess that's kind of the point#it wouldn't be mental illness if it made me feel good lmaooo#also i'm forcing myself not to proofread this at all because i don't want to get caught up in the cycle like i always do#so if there are any mistakes sorryyyyyy you can think of me as a semi-retired storyteller#frozen pines#camellia#casper birkshaw#tom connelly
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Could be off base, but I was thinking about Fang (again! Surprise!) and, with a couple of things he says, I don't think it's the hugest stretch that he might see himself as difficult to love at times? Which makes it lovelier that, not only is he loved so easily, but he also accepts that love so easily. Like, he knows that Tan likes him before Tan asks him out, but he never pushes him away, he never doubts it, like other characters might. And, I don't know, I just think it's nice. I really like the way his character is written
#tanfang#we are#we are the series#we are series#tan x fang#fang x tan#idk idt fang dislikes himself but i think you can be okay with yourself and still feel difficult to love?#maybe i'm just projecting onto fictional characters again though :P#talking to myself#Okay that’s it from me! I shall stop embarrassing myself now lol#lazzarella watches tv#wats*
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Stop calling My Lady Jane stupid! It's not stupid, it's actually a very deliberate and carefully crafted show FFS. They purposely made it anachronistic and whimsical and sexy AF! And it's good at being all those things!
Just like how Bridgerton isn't real history either and it's not trying to be, but it's very good at being a romantic fantasy!
Stop trying to prove you have refined taste and just enjoy things!
#*claws at face*#I'm so fucking tired of people saying they enjoyed something and insulting it in the next breath#can we please STOP THAT#hey guess what#if you liked something then you thought it was at least a little bit good#shocking i know#not sure why this is pissing me off so much now#it's not that i want exclusively positivity#totally okay to be critical!#but that's not usually what people are doing#it's more like they're embarrassed they enjoyed something#and with the more mainstream embrace of genre fiction i was really hoping we were past this#but apparently not#anyway#watch My Lady Jane it rules#my lady jane
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okay last thing and i know this is easier said than done and i think it's less of final end point and more of a continuous journey but once you let go of your shame and embarrassment over the things that make you happy, you'll have a lot more fun
#on this journey right now#and i think it's going okay#as a chronically insecure person with terrible self worth LMAO i am always defaulting to: oh but people see this and it's embarrassing#but i'm learning to ask myself why i think that and where the shame comes from#maybe someone does see me fall flat on my face but i'm a human being and human beings do that#it's okay#i've done it before and i'll do it again and life will continue#generally accepted that into my every day life and working to incorporate that into writing#i have so much to say about this topic but i think at the end of the day#i will remember the fun i have sharing the things i love#more than i will remember how awkward i felt for a little while#it's okay to be embarrassed that's natural#but dont let it stop you from doing the little things that make you happy#think of your child self etc etc etc#okay goodnight love you byeeeeee#✿ shut up willow
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Mouthwashing Spoilers
TW: Addiction and Self Harm
I wanna go on about Swansea's final monologue but it's hard to put into words, but I'm gonna try anyways cause it's a short, but strong story about autonomy again. This post ended up significantly longer than I wanted though
It's the autonomy to choose the "less healthy" option because it's appealing to you. It's the moral assignment to normality and stability. An alcoholic is an alcoholic by choice, technically, but do they owe us otherwise? Is it morally reprehensible to enjoy taking LSD at a party? Should we see someone as less than because they relax with a xanax instead of a hot shower? It's not healthy. We know that. We've seen anti-drug ad after ad after ad. But is that the part that's morally wrong, in and of itself? Does enjoying the drugs and chaos make Swansea a worse person?
Like him talking about his entire life and ending it by saying between the "stable" "normal" life and him waking up every morning with a new hangover, he preferred the latter. People always talk about getting clean and fixing their lives and Swansea did it! He did the thing "good men" do! A wife and kids and a trade job and sobriety! He was doing it! He was finally "worth" something!
And he hated it! I mean I don't know if he actually hated/despised it, but he misses his previous life. He misses drugs and partying and living like you might not wake up the next day. He said the thing that changed him was seeing himself dead in a ditch under the bright beam of a streetlight. Now he's looking down the barrel of a gun. And as he looks down it, he looks back. That was his preference. It felt good to be like that. And he wouldn't be here if he stayed there
We always have a narrative about drugs or gambling or sleeping around where a person suddenly realizes that they aren't "doing anything" with their life and becomes stable and it's always played like addiction is a false pleasure. Swansea got to the stability people said would be the real pleasure of life and that just wasn't true for him. One bad paycheck could've been the difference between his stable life and falling apart anyways. His lifestyle was going to kill him someday apparently, yet he's staring down the barrel of a gun at his steady trade job to feed his wife and kids.
I don't know quite how to word it but Swansea is the poster child for rehabilitation. There's this weight to him saying his alcoholic period was the best time of his life. Like it just hits at that pang that makes people wear DARE shirts while smoking weed and post those videos of smoking 100 cigarettes at once. Anti-vaping ads tell you about the damage they do to your body but everyone knows that already. Everyone knows "this is what your brain looks like on drugs." I smoke medical marijuana and it isn't good for my lungs but it's good for my pain. Doing drugs isn't good for me and I know that and that's sorta the point sometimes.
I don't know it's just this weird pang where I know what Swansea means, just not to nearly the same extent. I don't have an addiction so I don't think I could fully understand it. Maybe a better thing I could relate it to for myself is self harm. It's not healthy sure, but who do I owe health? Myself? Other people? And what is healthy? Is it feeling better now? Is it resisting now and feeling worse for it until it stops? What if the coping skills I learn make it worse? What if they make it better? Do I want it to get better? Does Swansea want to get better? What would better feel like to either of us?
Who knows until you try. Swansea got a collared shirt, a mortgage, and a credit card. He got a job and a wife and kids. He got sober. He got healthier, depending on your definition.
But did he feel better? He's looking down a barrel of a gun and he has to decide if he feels better. It doesn't seem like he regrets his new life. He says he wants his kids to be better than him. He wants good things to happen for them. He saw himself as one bad slip away from falling again. I don't think he felt better though. I think he got healthier. He likely would've ended up in the ditch he dreamt about, but we don't know that. We also don't know if that's what he'd prefer. But, we do know he got healthier, depending on your definition.
#mouthwashing#tw addiction#tw self harm#It got a little personal in the end but I keep watching that scene cause it reminds me of a convo with my therapist#It's been a lil under a year since I last self harmed#but he told me that things like addictions and self harm are tools#they're neutral actions that either make you feel better or worse#and that's usually up to the circumstances around the action rather than the act itself#Taking narcotics might fill you with shame or make you feel giddy. Maybe even both#Self harm can make you feel embarrassed but cathartic#That's unhealthy#now what?#There needs to be something to replace that feeling or you'll just crave it until you can't stand the feeling anymore#And sure you can talk about will and self control but why? Who are they doing this for? Themselves? Friends? Family?#Cause there's so many factors that can make that difference and sometimes the answer is 'No one'#So you crave and is that healthier? I'm not saying to self harm again or break your sobriety#But there's gotta be something to replace it. AA and NA use a higher power and ppl use nicotine gum for smoking#Essentially what I'm saying is that it's not the end of the world to enjoy your addiction#Is it unhealthy? Absolutely. Wounds can get infected and drugs can be laced or you can OD#But is it morally wrong for Swansea to say those were the best days of his life?#Is it wrong for him to live the sober life and decide he preferred his alcoholism?#My therapist doesn't want me to harm myself. He'd prefer for me to learn new coping skills to replace it. And I did#The urges still come up for me sometimes. He says they come up for him too. Less so. But they do#He says a relapse could happen. What's wrong with that? You just start over with a new goal and a new skill. And if that skill is worse?#Well that original tool is there until you get a new one. It's not great but it feels better than a new bad tool#And maybe it's okay to fiddle with that old tool if you don't wanna bother with a new one again
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Self indulgence a lil but even though like 80% of my drawings and posts in general are self indulgent..... anyways ya I wanna do smth special for my mutual bc they're silly which will consist of not talking to them :33
#I ponder too much with my posts because if I just stop up for way too long I get too shy and or embarrassed but.#ms paint#I dunno how much of this is. readable. not like there's anything to read but-#okay I'm just gonna post before I get too embarrassed and fly this drawing off to space#I don't tell my mutuals that they're cool..... that's a fault on my part.. won't be. wont be telling them any time soon#I'm kinda lost of what to do now that I finished mits bday present
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post exam clarity is hitting me like a truck I feel sick
#why did I. do any of that#I'm never gonna be free now am I#it's okay. im gonna forgive myself and move on.#what's the worst that could happen. I've been the butt of the joke my whole life ive been bullied my whole life#last year of school by every fucking gut ganging up on me in the class#i can deal with whatever comes of this#god...#it's fine. fuck it we ball#this isn't enough to faze me. just another embarrassing story for the roster#it all feels like a fever dream omg i legit can't even remember it it feels like i was watching all that happen to someone else#I'm on break now. finished a year of college. fresh start#vagueposting the shit out of tumblr dot com
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Speedran some first impression designs while re-listening to the few episodes of Penumbra I'd listened to a few years ago. All subject to change... Still figuring em out. Can never figure out the hair 😒
#i thought Juno was white when i first listened to it i feel real embarrassed neow 🧍🏾♀️#NO ONE'S GONNA SEE THAT WHITE JUNO EVER AGAIN#tpp#the penumbra podcast#juno steel#tpp rita#cecil kanagawa#cassandra kanagawa#cass kanagawa#peter nureyev#sasha wire#alessandra strong#fanart#tpp fanart#I'm on episode 2.23 now 🧍🏾♀️ y'all what's going on 🧍🏾♀️can someone explain this to me 😭#BEN 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#oh I'm forgetting tags aren't i. GOD. I'M OVERWHELMED OKAY. HELP!#my art#digital art#sketches#doodles
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i called this one "AV DVD PARODY" lol
inspired by this fic , i love bancho-kun in seifuku 🥰🫶
commission link -> (x)
#adashu#adasou#adayu#adachi tohru#yu narukami#persona 4#persona 4 golden#p4 fanart#p4g fanart#ladsofsorrow24#okay i actually did it lol#haa this is embarrassing but one of my 2025 goal is to be more shameless about what i love#so yeah... i'm putting my favorite boy in cute dress i don't care if he's not dainty :<#or small#also now you guys know i watch AV sometimes when i got frustrated with my art... haha
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HI EVERYBODY!! :D
I'm glad to say that I'm feeling way better now, it's the happiest I've felt in the last... What? Three weeks? And yeah, most people were right: what I needed was to step back and be out of the internet a little. (Not that I'm taking a break 100%, I'm just here less). I'm feeling like drawing again and this is great to me!!
Aaaand the lesson I learned is that your brain finds weird ways to improve your mental health: this time, to me, was to spend most of my time drawing Squid Game yaoi and watching Tik Tok videos. If it helps, it helps ig
#i feel lime talking rn#so again asks are VERY welcome as usual :>#i'll try my best to answer the ones I have already#now now now i want to talk about squid game so let's go#(on the tags bc... i'm kinda embarrassed lmao)#well i started to watch the second season because I needed something to keep my mind busy#and squid game seemed like something i wouldn't get fixated on#GUESS UP WHAT HAPPENED#at least i'm being the usual me and choosing the worst characters as my favorites#this time being thanos and nam-gyu#i've been drawing them a lot but i'll only post it if i feel like it#for now it's mostly a me thing#idk#okay that's all bye
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nelvas and elenfric are concrete Proofs that love is real and blooming
#text#beautiful sprouts of first love trust me on that#i'm just in slight denial because i wanna think t*lvas doesn't like n*loth much but that is ignorant towards -#- the degree and capacity of love a youngin can carry 😍 Sigh. ok maybe he's okay with liking that abomination#outside factors play into that (the harrowing things he has to live thru) but whatever. it's somewhat pure nonetheless#t*lvas' mom is gonna be in horrors and in bad condition upon finding out her son is being hit and experimented on -#- not to mention being piped by some old Monster but i think she will suck it up and calm down once she learns he's rich#'oh.. .. well.... okay then..Son... if you like him...😓' (t*lvas shuffling and looking at his nails)#he's jsut embarrassed#el*nwen deep and loving sense of ownership of her fave captive nepo baby#she wants to give him a bath#insane degrees of deep seated want for ulfr*c. bought him at the Nordstore and now he's hers 😍#sk*rim characters are so loving tho. G*lmar loves his friends so bad. my queen#el*nwen is fuming jealous over the thought of g*lmar giving ulfr*c a backrub#bye#ok actually maybe t*lvas youngin love not that beautiful because i forget logically it;s gonna leave him so broken it's unfathomable i can -#- always imagine him smelling clothes that reek of sweat and Death and being like 'everything reminds me of him😢'#he's gonna go hard on those prescription pills and mead but whatever#FIRST LOVEEEEE💗💗💗💗💗💗🫰🫰🫰🫰🫰
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I get One (1) romance scene in a game and I am done for. Kicking my feet giggling blushing. I'm going to stare at the screenshots like they're a picture of my sweetheart in a locket and sigh dreamily.
#wow i have a ramble tag now#no because okay. right. this is not particularly good romance content to me#i have read many a fanfic and i have a good idea of what good romance looks like#so it's very embarrassing that I get the barest bones of a very straight romance and i get more excited about it than while reading fic#when i say straight i don't mean heterosexual i mean like. by the book. bland or boring (but neutrally)#I Shan't Name Names. if you can guess congrats. if you can't you'll know if/when i start making fanart#anyway so yeah i need to make this a good relationship on my own because the game is not going to do it for me. BUT!#i am going to do it because i'm invested. if no one else does it it won't be done!#i'm not kidding this also happened to me last year when i was playing bg3 and getting to the astarion romance with constant#i was kicking my feet screeching and such#seeing it play out with my eyes is different okay!!!#girl i am so excited. about that and new year's and life in general. i'm having a MOMENT
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Your art looks so yummy and soft it tastes like soft ice-scream with different flavours for each character. GIVE ME MOREEEEEEEEEE
THIS MAKES ME SO HAPPYYY!!! 💙💙💙💙💙
HOW'D YOU KNOW!!!? No one has ever connected those dots for YEARS!!! 👀 See my headline? "With Love Of Every Flavor..." That's something I wrote in my adolescence which I just never bothered to change. It pertains to my posts and how I make them with love (you can cringe), but I also purposely used it to allude to- you literally guessed it- ICE CREAM!!! Which, according to my family, I was infamously obsessed with. STILL super obsessed with actually! (Tho in my defense, the Philippines is hotter than HELL rn.) So yes! I do see my own art as scoops of ice cream. Have been for- again -YEARS! Besides a "space bubble" for introverts -and people who simply love in a different flavor- to feel safe in, that's EXACTLY what I wanted my art to be seen as!!! Which is why I mostly draw sweet things. (Key word: Mostly.) I wanted to convey the giddiness I feel whenever I eat ice cream with my art. So hearing you say that, tho I know naming the taste of an artist's work isn't all that new, really feels like an achievement! THANK YOU!!! ...Okay. Now that you made it this far through my sappy sugar rush induced writing, I know I went off on a tangent, but since ya'll have been really hyping me up lately, how about an update? On my AU? Just a short and sweet reward? Nothing big. Not much lore, but let's saaaaay... it'll beeeee... today? 🫣 Hehe. More, indeed. ^v^ Stay Tuned~! -Bubbly💙
#sorry I got excited#and now I feel embarrassed#but I'm not rewriting that#I like being honest with my writing.#and in all honesty?#I have a HUGE sweet tooth!#Ice cream is my number one of course but I have other favorites#there's carbonated grapes (grape soda)#honey glazed donuts#leche flan#strawberry milk#ice cream CAKE#ube cake#matcha mochi#cookies and cream chocolates#that one sweet I keep forgetting the name of but it's like frozen icing in a crumbly cookie#red velvette cake#polvoron#ensaymada#mango shake#buttery pancakes#and- okay I'm just making myself hungry. I can't list every sweet in existence her unfortunately so#to end it here's something ironic. I don't like strawberries as is#I much prefer blue berries which isn't all that sweet#ANYWAYS! back to your regularly scheduled tags#Spacebubblearts#thanks for the ask!#HHStargazersAU#Asks#-OH SHOOT YEAH! Macarons- Ok ok I'll stop!
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