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derww · 19 hours ago

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the thing that bugged me the most after watching the wormhole video is actually that we never got the proper ending for the main plot line that was in it: parrot and spoke's personal relationship.

even though spoke showed that conversation from the end of wormhole, where parrot stood in front of spoke, clutching the handle of the hyperion, and said that he refuses to let people down even if it means he has to sacrifice something very important to him, this does not answer the question hanging in the air. from the point of view of the narrator, after losing op, parrot seems to lose his autonomy, both as an antagonist and, more importantly, as spoke's best friend, after spoke himself talked almost exclusively about their friendship for an hour, both as characters and, first of all, as real people.

"i didnt just exploit a game, i exploited a friendship i had built over the years.". speaking about both parrot and mapicc, spoke mentions several separate times how much it went beyond just playing on the server, that he abused their real, actual relationship in order to achieve his goal. at the same time, spoke does not tell what happened between them – both characters and people – after him receiving an op. in the jungle part, parrot literally has almost no lines – he just stares and stares and stares and stares. until the very end of the story, he follows the path that spoke paved for him, living in the conditions created by spoke.

we see only glimpses that everything is actually – at least relatively – fine. not only because parrot continues to play within the game, but also how he complains to spoke about the unfairness of using teleportation and that after the season ending he even suggests for spoke to become the new lifesteal owner. grains that do not reflect full image. was parrot horrified and shocked, was he angry, at least for a moment, when he realized how far spoke's manipulation extended, did they have to somehow solve and discuss it, or was he immediately like, "wow, you made a lot of awesome moves, there will be cool content!" and everything was fine? sure, parrot loves risk moves and adrenalin, but wasnt it too far?

can it even be "okay" if your best friend has been manipulating you for months for a personal goal? does this cross the line of what is truly acceptable, even in a lifesteal setting? even if it's all for the sake of shared content, even if the community has the right mentality, even if no real harm has been done, even if you're willing to trust a friend that he won't cross the line, does all this change the fact that it's, in general morality, just plain cruel?

although this is undoubtedly too personal to just insert into the video, it should be noted when the whole story is about abusing irl friendship. although i absolutely understand this decision, this is by no means a critical review, from the point of view of storytelling it is strikingly incorrect, as if in the middle of writing a book the writer threw out all rules.

of course, this is an important conversation to be had on the whole – with the rules never mentioned out loud, with an unspoken agreement that everyone understands what's going on here and how, and what everyone is signing up for, when the price is friendship and connection, how far is it too far? lsers are friends, to a greater or lesser extent, but it's almost inappropriate to answer "everyone has their limits" when a relationship is at stake. everyone, including spoke himself, agrees that what he did in s4 was too much, but there were many, many other moments where everything was not so clear, and, moreover, there was no discussion, even in private, which never solves the essence of the problem.

lifesteal is not unique, but it is a very rare system in how far people can be willing to go in a war against others, despite the fact that everyone is friends: most of the pre–lifesteal stories of this approach took place on public servers and against strangers, and friends' servers either remained frivolous to one degree or another, or were scripted. post-lifesteal, many servers of a similar kind have appeared, but only a small part of them are comparable in terms of the proximity of the players and the rigidity of the approach, because it is incredibly difficult to simultaneously allow yourself to get involved as deeply as possible and, at the same time, having received a knife in the back, not want to bury the traitor underground. It's about trust, and it's about content, and it's so strikingly different for different people, and there's obviously no right answer here.

when playing league of legends, one of the important skills that every player needs to develop is not to tilt. at the same time, take the game seriously, but be ready to let go of defeat, no matter how much effort you put into the game. don't go crazy when you lose a line and die ten times, and jungler yells at you as the worst possible being. it took me a few years to stop tilting, and it carried over to minecraft too – where my friends got upset, angry, and gave up, i learned to just shrug my shoulders and try again. but that didn't teach me how to deal with betrayal, even in-game, because the worst thing about betrayal is that it always comes from someone close to you. not from an accidental co-player in a match, and not as a simple accident, but as an intention to harm, even if only in the game. it is a lot to take, and the cost is too high. and, while parrot and spoke are still good friends, parrot left owner role because of the distress it gave him, so doesn't it show the presence of a real impact.

i like that we got only half-truth tho. because it is who spoke is. when he needs you to believe him, he says something actually truthful, and then – his lie and manipulation, and you eat it because believe everything to be true. even now, spoke continues to metagame. he's fine with showing that he was a dick, and he's using that to cover a part he never wants to explain. and he wouldn't.

spoke tells the truth saying he liked to do the impossible, but it is not a full answer. while s4 ending was supposed to be a relief for him, an opportunity to stop lying and being a villain, there remains something else – not only the showdown, but the guilt, the realization that you were so wrong that you hide huge chunks and you refuse to get them for another year and a half. when everything ends, when there is nowhere else to run, reflection and awareness remain. a year and a half later, from the season 6, spoke can end the video on a positive note, but for that long-time spoke, who had just released the god from his body, covered with lightning scars everywhere, absolutely not feeling like a winner, it was a bad end, and perhaps for his character, it couldn't be good.

how old was spokeishere when he did all this, 16? there is an irony that he is the worldender, the trickster, the manipulator, and he's the youngest of them all. sometimes i want to call him dumb for not being careful enough or anything else but then i do remember how he played everyone in s4. not in a big picture, but in smalltalks, toying people while they thought him to be completely harmless. spokeishere being smart is like lifesteal having its unspoken rules – you need to be too attentive to see it. often it is like a... circles on the water. you can't see a fallen pebble, but you can see the waves radiating from it. and, in the end, he is the one who did it, who succeeded, and who am i to judge him?

minecraft roleplay can do something very wrong with you, how any acting sometimes can break you apart and turn inside out. because while you are letting yourself feel like it's real, it is, at some capacity, can be real. and while it is a known factor of being an actor, it's not something you do think about when you go to play a game with your friends. sometimes it changes something very, very important in you, and sometimes you look back on that experience and realize that it hurt you. or not. everyone has their unique experiences, as always.

also, we finally found out the reason the fishing spot was so important. not only a place of friendship but also a place of the exploiting! yay!

#d.thoughts #lifesteal spoilers #spokeishere

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scoobydoodean · 2 days ago

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As monumental as the confession scene was, it kinda leaves a bad taste in my mouth that Cas only confessed because he was going to sacrifice himself. Like, Dean's worthy of being saved, but he's not worthy of being loved in a way that's not going to wreck him long term?

Well, I think we can safely say Cas did not mean it this way and would be horrified if confronted by this angle, but that it would be well within Dean's perspective (built on his own experience) to think of it that way and become even more convinced that loving him is a death sentence and that everyone will always leave him. Multiple people have proved they're willing to die for Dean Winchester and there's nothing special about it (from his perspective). He wants some to live for him instead.

Cas doesn't really know how fiercely Dean mourns him when he's gone, and while I think he's cognizant of Dean's insecurities to some extent, I'm not sure he realizes exactly how deep they go. Even if Cas was told like "Well when you were dead, Dean spent months drinking himself into the ground" or "When you and Mary and Crowley were dead, Dean had a suicide kit and he used it and when you came back he said it was his 'big win'". I sometimes think Cas would have trouble processing that he'd have anything to do with Dean's bouts of depression because of his own hang ups.

See: Cas hearing Dean pray to Cas every night for a year, searching for him through Purgatory, and Cas never getting it through his head that whole time that Dean wasn't going to leave without him and wasn't interested in his self-flagellating isolation play to "protect" Dean (which—if we're being real—wasn't just about protecting Dean).

See: Cas hearing Dean stress throughout season 12 that he worries about Cas when he goes radio silent on them and that he wants them to communicate with each other and work as a team, and Cas going "okay" then stealing The Colt so he can go radio silent on them and get a win all by himself and decidedly not as a team because Cas does not want that.

Like. There is clearly a HUGE disconnect between them when it comes to how to communicate as a team and what it means to protect the people you love. More than that—their own psychological needs and desires for themselves as individuals seem to vary quite substantially (and they clash and create more miscommunication). They both crave safety and stability, but to Cas, safety and stability means knowing "I got a win, I did a good job, and now when I go home I feel respected and needed" and to Dean, "a win" means his family is safe. To Dean, safety and stability means, "We are all together in our home, and we tell each other where we're going when we leave. We handle things as a team and communicate with each other instead of going behind each others backs."

Cas really slots himself into the protector role and I think to an extent, Dean is willing to concede that role to him. See: Rocky's bar, where Dean imagines himself as retired and working as a barkeep. He's still perfectly capable of defending himself, but he doesn't go out looking for hunts. Sam and Cas are still hunting, but Dean feels psychologically safe about it because he knows where they are, and they always come home to his bar to see him and to be fed. In real life, Cas slots himself pretty aggressively into the protector role, but he doesn't communicate and doesn't always value teamwork. He doesn't realize while trying to "protect" their family that his aggressive tendency to isolate from them to "protect" them is 1) reminiscent of Dean's father and 2) distressing to Dean because Dean doesn't know (as a person who has lost many people he cares about including Cas multiple times) where Cas is or that he is safe or if he needs their help. Cas also doesn't see his tendency to lone wolf as abandonment and doesn't see any self-centeredness in it, but Dean does (and I don't think Dean is totally off—just like I don't think Cas was avoiding Dean in Purgatory just to keep Dean safe and for no other reason).

Anyway. All of this to say. I have said in the past that it is very possible that Cas would avoid Dean if he came back after The Empty took him. But say Cas did openly and with abandon continue to acknowledge that he loves Dean. I think if Dean withdrew from him, it would be so much fun if it was less out of timidness and fear and more out of anger. Dean knows what Cas is trying to say, but Dean doesn't feel understood, and he doesn't feel loved even if Cas loves him, and I could totally see a reality where Dean tries to give Cas a taste of his own medicine by making Cas chase him all over the country about it in a game of cat and mouse. Obviously, Cas is growing increasingly impatient and angry about this as he pursues his charge and intense sexual tension is building the whole time so when Cas finally catches up to Dean they aggressively fuck each other about it.

#mail #and cas is my best friend #14.10 #12.19

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ladykailitha · 20 hours ago

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Share With Me One Love, One Lifetime Part 1

Here we go. The final story in the Boy with a Bat trilogy. It's certainly come a long way from when I first started writing for this fandom. Two years ago on this day, I put out Can Anybody See Me? because there was serious lack of season 2 AUs were Hellfire had taken Steve under their wing. And then it grew from one story into two with Never Hold Back Your Step... and I promised I would get Steddie all the way through season 4 to come out alive on the other side.

The goal is to get all the story out before season 5 premiers. So far of what I've written, we're about 2/3 of the way through season 4. We'll get to the end and then we'll have a short epilogue.

Thank you to everyone who cheered me on to complete this trilogy. But especially @bookworm0690, @kultiras, and @dreamercec.

The title like the previous two stories before it (here and here) comes from a musical. In this case, The Phantom of the Opera. RIP Eddie. You would have loved that musical.

In this we have our boys caught between a rock and hard place, Steve watches Lucas's game, and Eddie gets into some trouble.

Steve was going to murder someone. He just hadn’t decided on who yet. Though at the moment it was starting to look like Lucas.

“And you’re sure you can’t move it to another night?” he asked, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Yeah,” Eddie murmured. “Mike leaves for California in the morning and most of the other guys have plans too. Then once spring break comes back...”

“You can’t use the drama room because the play is starting up,” Steve finished for him. “Shit. And I can’t have it here. My mom somehow found out about the movie nights and threatened to have my dad kick me out if it happened again.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah,” Steve said, nervously chewing on his lip. “And you know I’m gonna want to support Lucas.”

Eddie let out a long sigh. “Yeah I know. Dustin told me. I just wish Lucas had come to me instead of the flying monkeys you know?”

“Me too,” Steve said, closing his eyes. “He just got in with the boys on the basketball team and I’m worried he’s going to alienate himself from his friends if he continues to hang out with them.”

“I’m worried about that too,” Eddie huffed. “And my speech was aimed at Carver by the way. In the heat of the moment I had forgotten Lucas was on it. Got reminded afterwards though.”

Steve opened his eyes and let out answering sigh. The little bell above the door twinkled, heralding the arrival of customers. “Look, I’ve got to go, I have to actually work.”

“Booo,” Eddie hissed. “I’ve got that deal with Chrissy after the game, so I’ll be by after that, okay?”

“Okay, Eds,” Steve said. “Be safe.”

“Yup!”

Steve hung up the phone with another sigh. He straightened up and put on his best customer service smile. “Welcome to Family Video, how can I help you today?”

The rest of the day flew by in a flash and too soon he was picking up Brenda for the game. She had come into the store earlier and was talking about how she really wanted to go to the game because her brother was on the team but her parents didn’t want to go.

So Steve offered to take her. He was pretty sure she thought it was a date, but Steve kept trying to steer here away from that sort of talk. He’s not sure he succeeded.

“It’d be funny if we won the championship game the year after you graduated,” Brenda said with a smile.

Oh hell no.

“I wasn’t on the team my senior year,” he said with a bitchy expression. “You would know that if you actually watched us play. I was out with a concussion.”

Brenda smirked. “You know what I mean. I just mean that you were King Steve, we didn’t win the championship once.”

“Yes,” Steve cocking his head forward, “but I’m the one that got us to the championship my junior year. I sunk that last shot with nothing but net that got us into the final game. The other team was better. You can still do everything right and have the other team just be better.”

Then it looked they were going to lose, so they let Lucas play. After all what was the harm of letting him play for the last minute of the game.

And then a miracle happened.

Lucas was at the three-point line and he let go of the ball just as the buzzer went off. Steve rose to his feet as the shot sailed into the air and hit the basket dead on.

Lucas had won the championship game for the Tigers.

Steve was jumping up and down and just screaming. “Yes! Yes! Yes!!!”

After the players came back out from the locker rooms, Steve put his arm around Lucas.

“Looks like our hard work paid off,” he said with a teasing grin.

Lucas rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah. Thank you, Steve.”

Steve gave him a tight one-armed hug and then whispered in his ear, “If you feel uncomfortable for any reason, just give me a call and I’ll be there in a heartbeat. And don’t let anyone pressure you into something you don’t want to, okay?”

Lucas nodded and then hurried to catch up to Jason and his friends.

Steve shook his head and turned to Brenda. “Hey do you need me to take you home?”

She shook her head. “My brother is going to drop me off before heading the celebration.”

“You got it,” Steve said with a thumbs up. He stopped for a moment. “Which one did you say was your brother again?”

“I didn’t,” Brenda sneered. It’s Andy Snyder, number forty-three.”

Dread pooled in Steve stomach. Andy was the new Tommy H. A bully and a brute, on and off the court.

“He played good tonight,” he said with a fake smile smile firmly in place.

Her returning smile was even less sincere and she walked away. Steve put his hands on his hips and looked up, pressing him lips together.

He was now certain she thought they were on a date, but with Steve paying more attention to Robin then her and rooting for Lucas without even asking who her brother was... yeah. According to her the date was a failure, according to Steve, he dodged that fucking bullet.

Steve had barely kicked off his shoes when the walkie talkie he kept next to the door crackled to life.

“Code Red!” Eddie hissed. “I have a fucking Code Red! Is anyone there? Please god, please!”

Steve was on the line faster then from one breath to the next. “Eddie, this is Steve. Repeat, this is Steve. What’s your status?”

“Chrissy is dead, man,” Eddie whined. “She–she rose up into the air, like a puppet on a string and oh god!”

“Shit, shit, shit!” he cursed. “You’ve got to get out of there, now! Stash the van and run for Rick’s. After the game there are going to be too many eyes on my place. You keep your head down, you hear?”

“Yeah,” Eddie breathed. “Yeah. Oh god, it was so bad, Stevie. Why her? She was so nice to me. Why her?”

“We’ll find out,” Steve breathed. “I just don’t know who would be around right now. Everyone is out scattered because of the game, Nancy and Mike are getting ready to take him to the airport for him to fly out to California and everyone is out celebrating the win.”

“What about Dustin?” Eddie murmured. He hated bringing a kid into this, but if that was who they had...”

“I don’t know where he is,” Steve said chewing on his thumb nail. He should have picked up before he did.

“Shit!”

Steve let out a shuddering breath and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’ve got work tomorrow, but as soon as I can, I’ll bring you clothes and food enough for you hide out there, okay?”

He had a lot of Eddie’s clothes over at his place, it wouldn’t be hard for him to pack a bag.

“Yeah, okay,” Eddie sighed. “You’ve got a handle on this. Just don’t forget about me, okay?”

“I’d never.”

“Hey,” Robin said after Steve pretty much blew up at a customer for not know if her boyfriend liked scary movies or not. “Are you okay?”

Steve grimaced. He had tried to get people on the walkies this morning but he couldn’t get anyone on the line and he didn’t have a chance to talk to Robin, because she had been running full steam about Vickie all morning.

But before he could even open his mouth to answer Dustin came storming in, with Max hot on his heels. “Turn on the news now!”

Robin turned over to the news and sure enough the breaking news was of a girl being murdered at the Forest Hills Trailer Park and the investigation was ongoing.

“That’s Eddie’s trailer!” Dustin cried.

“I saw Chrissy go into his trailer last night,” Max admitted, “and then he came running out screaming.”

“Why you didn’t get anyone on the walkies?” Steve growled. “That would have been great to know last night!”

“My mom sold them for more booze,” she snapped back.

Steve pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed heavily.

“We need to find him!” Dustin insisted. “He’s innocent! There is no way he did this! He couldn’t have!”

“Whoa!” Steve said sternly. “You think I don’t know that? I’m the one who introduced him to you do you forget!”

Dustin blinked at him for a moment and then nodded. “Sorry Steve, I freaked out when I found that my walkie talkie had been accidentally been turned to the wrong channel, but I couldn’t get him on it this morning and I was really worried.”

“Okay...” Robin said, raising an eyebrow, “and why are you here, specifically?”

“Oh, I was going to hack your system to find out where Eddie might have gone aground?” Dustin said with a grimace.

Steve buried his head in his hands. “Oh I am so getting fired.”

Max scoffed. “As if your peon bosses would be able to tell Dustin even touched it.”

Steve put his hands on his hips and rolled his eyes skyward. “No, that’s not why I’m getting fired.”

Everyone else looked at each other in confusion.

“Then why are you getting fired?” Dustin asked with one raised eyebrow.

“I’m guessing you’re going to want to hasten to Eddie’s rescue, yes?” he asked licking his bottom lip slowly.

Dustin rolled his eyes again. “Yes!”

“And how would you get there?” Steve pressed. “You bikes? Because that won’t draw attention to where Eddie might be hiding.”

“Well, no,” Max said, “we’d make you take us.”

“Which means I would be abandoning the job to go look for Eddie if we left now, yes?”

Dustin and Max eyes went wide and then they said together, “Oh.”

“Yeah,” Steve huffed, shaking his head. “You either wait until two when I’m off or I’m going to get fired.”

“Two, you said?” Max said with a wince.

“Mhmm.”

“That’s not too bad,” Dustin hedged. “After all it might take me that long to crack the system and find Eddie.”

He went to go leap over the counter when Steve grabbed him by the scruff of his neck.

“Oh hell no,” Steve snapped. “One I just sorted those tapes and I’m not doing it again, and two you don’t need to hack shit, because I know where he is without all the techno bullshit.”

“Techno is a genre a music,” Max supplied unhelpfully.

“And it’s not bullshit if it helps us find him!” Dustin growled.

“Did you even listen to the rest of Steve said?” Robin asked, knocking his hat off his head. “He knows where Eddie is.”

Dustin blinked at Steve for a moment. “How would you know that?”

Steve rolled his head and tilted his head back. “Because I was on the actual fucking walkie talkies you make us carry around everywhere we go and Eddie radioed the party last night. AND I was the only one who answered!”

Dustin and Max blinked at Steve’s outburst, shocked that he would yell at them. But with Eddie missing and a girl dead, it was forgivable.

“So where is he,” Dustin groused, picking up his hat and slamming it down on his head, “if you’re so smart?”

“Reefer Rick’s boathouse on Lover’s Lake?” Steve suggested with a half shrug.

Max folded her arms and glared at Steve. “And how would you know where that is?”

Steve threw his arms in the air with a huff of frustration. “We’d go there sometimes when my dad was being an ass, okay?” He looked down at his shoes and scuffed his shoe on the carpet. “It was a place no knew but us. Sometimes Rick would be there and we’d watch TV sometimes.”

Dustin looked at him disbelieving. “Yeah, sure...that’s all you did.”

“I hate to break it to you kid,” Steve said dryly, “but drug lords actually prefer that their dealers aren’t doing the drugs they’re selling. It’s bad for business.”

“Oh.”

Tag List: 10 SLOTS REMAINING

1- @itsall-taken @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @sadisticaltarts @dolphincliffs

2- @gregre369 @a-little-unsteddie @irregular-child @cryptid-system @kultiras

3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog

4- @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji @dreamercec @blondie1006

5- @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @genderless-spoon @fearieshadow @thesecondfate

6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman

7- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth

8- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss

#my writing #stranger things #steddie #ladykailtiha writes #boy with a bat

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numberonetacostan · 2 days ago

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TACO'S TIRADE ANALYSIS

OKAY! It is time for the requested analysis of Taco’s Tirade. This is my first time doing a big analysis of like, anything, so I’m very sorry if this is the worst take on the song of all time or if everything I’m saying is obvious!! Can anyone tell i'm nervous about posting this lol. I have a lot of thoughts about Taco and her Tirade. I love it so much. Feel free to imagine me gesturing wildly with tears in my eyes as you read this. We’ll go in sections based on the lyrics and visuals :) Lyrics will be inside brackets, then commentary will be below! Please enjoy!! <3

Tw: slight discussion of suicidal ideation

[Any moment now...

Are you sure this is what you want?

(Scoff) Oh spare me your spin, you tablet tabloid. If you want to psychoanalyze someone, don't look at me.]

Alright, so we immediately see Taco still in a very emotional state. Mepad asking if she’s sure she wants to interfere with the challenge immediately provokes her, and starts her off on her entire tirade. Because he asked if she was sure. She immediately insults him and moves to change the subject and get his attention off of herself and her own mental well-being. She’s very in-denial of her own emotions and emotional pain in this song, as we’ll see going forward, and remains quite defensive for a lot of the song.

[Look at them! It's so pathetic,

How they run to fetch their sticks.

Sure, call me polemic, unsympathetic,

At least I know other tricks!]

We start here with her, as I stated, changing the subject and shifting the view onto the contestants figuratively and somewhat literally, as they’re all seen picking up the sticks for the challenge, although she still remains the main focus of the shot. We move to her dancing around Mepad, who takes up the center of the shot, but Taco is still the focus here!! She’s moved from deflecting conversation to the contestants to, in a way, defending herself, despite Mepad not having insinuated anything yet. Taco is calling herself polemic and unsympathetic here, not only because she thinks that of herself, what with her abysmal self-esteem that we see more of later in the song, but because she thinks that’s what Mepad thinks of her. Not only do her only other two friends ever hate her (I wouldn’t go that far for Mic, but that’s definitely what Taco thinks), but the rest of the season 1 cast don’t seem to think too highly of her either, yeah? Mephone certainly isn’t happy to see her soon after the song ends, and season 2 contestants like Mic and Suitcase have been shown to be wary of her before they’ve even met her. (She doesn’t know about the season 3 cast so they don’t really matter here.) The point being, Mepad is Mephone’s right hand (leg?) man, and Taco doesn’t know about their argument, so she’s pretty reasonably assuming that Mepad dislikes her just as much as everyone else does. So, she’s saying what she thinks he’s thinking about her before he can!! Forgive me for not knowing the technical name for it, but this is an actual way of deflecting criticism!! I’ll use an example. Say you made a drawing of a person, a little stick guy, but the proportions are off. One of their legs are way bigger than another, but you still want to post it anyway. To keep people from telling you that one leg is bigger than another, you might say “here’s my stick dude!! One leg is bigger than another but I’m too lazy to fix it.” By stating the potential criticism before anyone else can, it makes others MUCH less likely to comment on it themselves!! And that’s what I believe Taco is doing here!!! I hope I explained that well enough. She then goes on defending herself, self-justifying by saying she at least “knows other tricks.” I read this as her doing things outside the game, and it’s limits. That could be her acknowledging how she doesn’t play by the rules of the competition like they do, but I see it as a note of the hypocrisy/lying to herself we see from Taco in the song. And!! In the transition to the next verse, she has her eyes closed!! Which happens everytime we travel in and out of that purple-y space! We are seeing Taco’s inner image here people!!!!!

[Look at me and all you'll see is the debris of some defective outcast,

A frenetic, antithetic (if poetic) little iconoclast,]

Here we have Taco insulting herself more! Yay! She’s getting more emotional as we get into the song, and she becomes less and less able to keep her usually sturdy walls up. She’s just lost Mic, and as I’ll go over later in the analysis, is expecting she will be permanently dead relatively soon. Of course she’s having a lot of trouble keeping it together! You know how sometimes, if you’re trying not to cry and someone asks if you’re okay, it makes you burst into tears? It’s like that! Mepad asked if she was sure, and the dam began to break. So, the descriptors she uses tell us a lot about her view of herself!!! Debris. Broken remains of what was. That’s pretty accurate to how Taco is feeling right now. She’s drowning in debris, really! The debris of her old, broken friendships, the debris of her master plan to win season 1, and it’s to the point where she sees herself as broken and incomplete as well. She believes she’s broken!!! And that leads us right into her calling herself defective. Imperfect or faulty. She’s very separated from everyone else, yeah? Everyone else (to her knowledge) lives in the hotel. Everyone else is part of the group. Everyone else has people who care about them. Everyone else happily plays by the rules of the game. After everything, compared to everyone else? No wonder she sees herself as incapable of changing, she believes there’s something just, deeply wrong with her as a being. If everyone else can do this and have this, she has to be the problem. And almost right after she started putting forth that effort to get Mic to trust her, focusing on someone other than herself, Mic left her. Rightfully so, but please it is so important to think of it from Taco’s perspective rather than Mic’s in this analysis. Taco was trying to give Mic what she thought she wanted (recognition), trying to be a good friend, and it immediately lost her the most important person in her life. She’s been watching for years, she sees everyone else making strong connections, but she can’t do it when she tries. And before that, it’s her plan failing. Like Brian said in a stream, it was inconceivable to her that her plan would fail. Yet it did. And after a long enough time alone out in the woods, there isn’t anyone left to blame for that but herself. She was the reason her plan had failed, and she’d lost everything. Of course she’d see herself as defective. Outcast is pretty obvious, because she checks all of those boxes. Lives hidden, alone, and very much away from everyone else. She is very very much not part of the group anymore.

Frenetic!! Fast, wild, and uncontrolled. Frankly, something you’d be more likely to describe Taco’s season 1 persona with, yeah? It’s quite different from how Taco usually tries to present herself, being cunning and calculating around others. But of course, the further we get into the song, the more honest Taco unintentionally can get about how she sees herself. She had her whole plan for season 1 down, but it was in the end where she lost control over the situation in which she lost control of herself in which she lost everything. It was in the ship, where something she didn’t and realistically couldn’t have planned for happens that she once again lost control of the situation and thus control of herself, and used violence despite Mic’s plea not to, in which she lost everything again. Of course she’d see herself as wild and uncontrollable, because moments in which she was are standout moments of her life! Not to mention again, how she’s the contestant who tried to steal the prize and cheated in season 2. For better or for worse, she’s much less controlled by the rules of the game than the other contestants. Just another thing that separates her from the group, yeah? Antithetic!!!! In direct opposition to something. And the following word as well, iconoclast, an attacker of a beloved institution or beliefs. She’s against the game that everyone else plays again and again, something that really matters a lot to them, but we see in the show and especially in the finale that the game isn’t good for them. As much as it’s not always for quite the right reason and exactly how she ends up going about it, she has a strong point about the game itself and what it can do to all of them. But she still sees herself as the villain. Despite her genuine, and correct, belief that ending the game will make things better for everyone, she still sees herself as the villain!! And it’s an image of herself that she’s had for a long time, and that she can’t shake after everything, because she doesn’t believe she can be anything else. And I did not forget how she mentions herself as being “poetic!” Whether that’s her believing in “karmic justice” or whatever and that she got what was coming with her, or believing her role as a season 1 finalist who’s come back out of the shadows to try and end season 2, it is one of the few neutral adjectives she uses for herself in the song. It might even be her previous popularity and persona she’s referencing here, that antitheticism and iconoclasm being how she went from a silly, well-loved character to a serious, well. She’s still loved out of canon but none of the people she knows like her at all. She’s the antithesis of what she used to be, and her coming out of the act destroyed the beloved image of who she had pretended to be.

As for the visuals here, how the scene fades back into her and Mepad is so important! She falls off of a cliff into darkness!! A very clear visual representation of how she sees things having gone. After her fight over the suitcase with OJ in the s1 finale, she kept falling and falling and falling, deeper down into the dark hole she’s dug herself, until she’s landed right where she is as she’s singing. Not only that, but this visual is another excellent representation of how she sees things as over for her. How she sees herself as incapable of changing, starting over, or getting better at all. Think about the cliff we know of on the island. Now think about who actually fell off that cliff at the end of season 1. Think about what happened to them. They all DIED!!! And she is picturing herself falling off this cliff!! I doubt this was intended to be a sign of suicidal ideation for her, since ii does have a younger target demographic (ex. Justy said in a stream that OJ and Paper sleeping in the same bed would be a bit too mature), but it can definitely be read that way. Seeing herself as “dead” in a way revolves around that disbelief in self-improvement she has, she thinks it’s too late for her in the same way it’s too late to save someone who’s died!!! And if anyone is questioning whether the scene is just a visual effect or if it’s definitely Taco’s inner picture-y thing, please note her closed eyes during the transition from her falling from the cliff to standing with Mepad!! She is picturing these visuals as she sings!!

[But I won't live in the past.

(Spoken) I almost won this game once, you know. But!]

So we all agree that Taco is totally living in the past, right? She’s saying she’s moved on, she’s telling Mepad and herself that the past doesn’t matter and that she doesn’t care about it, and then immediately she mentions how she almost won before. She has not healed at all, and is not over a single thing that happened!!! She is doing so awful I love her <3. She longs for everything she’s lost constantly, because she’s lost everything!!!!!

[History is rearranged just to credit those who win the glory,

So reality is changed in the edit when they spin the story,]

So!!! Interestingly enough, I think that these lines are quite a bit about the disparities between OJ and Taco!! So, Taco had a whole strategy going into season 1 that got her into the finals, and had it not been for Bow, she would have won! She’d planned meticulously, and in the s1 finale is shown to have great physical capabilities, at least to the point to which she was able to get way ahead of OJ. And, while this may be by great bias towards Taco speaking at least in part, OJ… did not go to such lengths. Don’t get me wrong though, this is definitely a thing. It’s brought up in the show that he wasn’t a huge player in the game! Multiple times!!! S1E15 “The Tile Divide,” after OJ wins immunity with help from Paper Mephone4 says “OJ wins! Wow, that hasn’t happened for a while.” And in S1EP16 “The Penultimate Poll,” Pickle says “-even though [OJ] barely actually won any challenges.” Yet after all is said and done, Taco is outcasted, has nothing, and is disliked by pretty much everyone, and OJ is hailed as the “King of Inanimate Insanity”, is rich, and becomes the de facto group leader with his hotel. The way the narrative has been spun does certainly glorify OJ beyond his actual performance in the competition. And with OJ having his massive ego problems, I don’t doubt that he definitely let that get to his head and contributed to that narrative himself.

And in this shot we have Taco looking down at the hotel from the forest, the same way she’s looking down on everyone participating in the game and how she’s been watching Mic (and presumably Pickle) from the outside. Only now, she’s even further away from them.

[And we choose, to feel this pain,]

Taco denying her emotions again!!!! She likes to be in control, and she can not control her feelings nor keep pushing them down as she has been, so she’s onto deny deny deny!! She is in a lot of pain, and she knows it, so she deflects by saying she’s choosing to feel the pain of her losses. She’s keeping up her act, her defense, by desperately holding on and pretending she has control over these feelings!! I’m certain she’s tried to control them!! To justify herself, replace loneliness with anger, but it hasn’t worked!!! And her defensiveness is reflected in the visuals as well, her putting her hand up to keep a distance between her and Mepad, her still stubbornly keeping up those walls and forcing him away as he looks concerned for her.

[And we lose, more than we gain…]

OH BOY TIME TO LOSE MORE THAN WE GAIN. I use this phrase daily. I'm serious. A pretty obvious reference to Mic having said she gained nothing, and also an acknowledgement that their partnership truly meant something to Taco and is still greatly affecting her. Which is obvious to the audience, but not only is Mepad learning things about Taco and her issues through the song, but we really see Taco starting to fall apart, accidentally implying the feelings that she’s so desperate to keep down!! She’s like a trauma volcano <3. Anyways, Taco had gained a lot when she’d met Mic, even if it took her quite some time to realise, and by the time she did she’d lost it all, again. AS FOR THE VISUALS we once again move into Taco’s head!! The transitions here for the beginning and end of this short sequence have her with her eyes closed!! She’s walking, and hard stops when she sees Pickle and the time travel portal. You see her little feet slide to a stop on her heels! She leans away from him, leans towards him just a tad, and immediately turns and walks away, only to see Mic. She hard stops when she sees Mic too, though it’s less extreme than it was for Pickle. And when she does this, she reaches a hand out towards Mic. It’s for a few reasons I think. Holding it out to try and keep that hurt away, protect her from her thoughts of missing Mic and how much she must hate her, fully reaching out because she misses Mic dearly and that pain is so fresh, reaching out to the person she’s been so close to, closer than anyone before. Another part of it, I think, is how her conflicts with both Pickle and Mic went. With Pickle, Taco was the one who insulted him, claimed they were never friends, and cut things off. Thus, she hard stops when she sees him, only leans a bit closer to him, before turning around and walking away. With Mic, Taco was the one who was left this time. Mic cut things off with her. So she’s left reaching out to Mic, as Mic’s image leaves the screen, and Taco collapses onto her knees where she is. Taco’s left on the ground, squeezing her eyes closed and clutching her head as the darkness in the background, the darkness in Taco’s head closes in on her, until she closes her eyes and jumps straight back into her villain act, the song speeding up with her as she keeps trying to get away from all of her feelings!!! My queen with awful coping skills <3.

[But I will break this cycle,

Of mistakes, unlike all,

Of these snakes whom I call to condemn,]

So! We see Taco hard cutting from her guilt and sadness, straight into her evil plan. Right back into her villain front as she realises she’s begun to open up and get emotional!!! So she’s explaining her plan to Mepad, and projects her own self-hatred and experiences very hard onto the contestants. She’s upset about what happened between her and Mic and sees the game as at fault for what happened as she’s trying to justify things to herself, and push down the guilt she feels about their split. Heck, I’d say she’s probably blaming the game for what happened between her and Pickle right now, even if that one is more on her. And she sees the final four as complacent in what the game does, with them all continuing even though none of them are even enjoying themselves anymore. Most of them haven’t been enjoying themselves for a while now, but they still stay in line and play, as they’re programmed to. This is a bit off track, but it’s important to keep in mind that at this point, Taco has been acting more outside of her programming for longer than any of the other contestants. She was never in whatever sort of waiting-mode they end up in inside the hotel, and she’s cared less and less about the rules of the game as time has gone on. Her plot in the first season was done fully inside the rules of the game, but we see her having broken out of those constraints in season 2, with her encouraging Mic to straight up attack other contestants, which is implied by Taco to be against the rules. And she keeps interfering against those same rules of the competition. Like Marsh breaking the rules by leaving the show’s parameters, Taco explicitly goes against what is meant to happen in the game. And here she is at the peak of that, having gone from breaking the rules of the game to wanting to break the game, the cycle of mistakes, entirely. Her calling the remaining contestants “snakes” of all things specifically is interesting as well, since I’m sure plenty of the season 1 cast would use that to describe Taco. Part of it is her projecting, but another part of it is her actually seeing her own mistakes in the remaining contestants. Keeping secrets from each other (Knife), never properly talking out interpersonal issues (Suitcase & Baseball), and plain loneliness (Lightbulb). And she’s condemning them for their complacency in all of it, for their actions, most certainly in part with her efforts to ignore her own feelings and as well to call out how the game changes people and makes them act.

[If I can't win the prize,

I'll play this last reprisal,

Just to bring their lies all to an end.

-Ack!]

The first line here is more of Taco playing up her villain act. She mentions later on in the episode, while she’s being more honest since it’s surrounding Mic territory, to the final four that she doesn’t care about the money anymore. And I really believe she doesn’t! She’s broken out of that programming after having connected with Mic. She was one of the contestants, if not the contestant, made to be most dedicated to getting that money, so of course she mentions it as she’s still desperately keeping up her front!!! But she says in the very next line that this is her “last reprisal,” she clearly doesn’t intend to interfere or interact with the game again, much less try to swoop in and steal the million. And the last reprisal line is very important!!!! Notice how in the visuals, Taco lets herself fall out of a tree as she says this and upon landing she’s hurt by her injury. There is symbolism here guys!!!!!!! She is letting herself fall here. In her eyes, she doesn’t have anything left to fight for anymore. She’s lost the people important to her, she’s lost any goals she’d had driving her forward, and she hates herself!! She knows she’s injured, and that her injury could very well be lethal, as we see later in the episode, but she’s doing nothing to minimize the risk to herself. She’s not going to sit away and let herself feel and process, she’s going to burn the game down and die with it!!!! This, my friends, is called passive suicidal ideation and self-destructive behavior!!!!! And her facade starts to falter again and she mentions bringing their lies to an end!! Because she is lying to herself, and she herself is not ready to stop holding on to her lies, either to herself or to others in her persona. Bringing the game and all the lies tangled up in it to an end means she would finally have to face everything, and just thinking about that is enough to wipe the villainous grin off her face. But she’s still stubbornly going through with her plot, because she isn’t truly expecting she’ll have to face it, again because she is fully expecting to die permanently in the near future!!!!

[You need regeneration.

Unfortunately, I don't have much faith in that process.

Of course not.

Why "of course not?".

You believe yourself to be incapable of starting over, in more ways than one. I do not know who you lost, but is it not possible to get them back?]

MEPAD TIME!!!! Okay, here we have Mepad (rip king you would have loved the storyboards of your own death) urging Taco to heal!!! He’s looking out for her physical well-being, he can tell that she’s in pain and that her injury is quite dangerous, that being especially obvious the way he emphasises “need” in the line. And he is implying that she needs emotional healing as well!! He starts his Therapad-ing in his next line!! <3 He is very clearly worried about her, a lot of his presence in the first half of the song is just him looking at Taco with big concerned eyes!!!

And Taco has zero faith in the recovery process, between her, as Mepad helpfully says, believing herself to be incapable of starting over in more ways than one, her believing no one would want her to be recovered, her having a hunch of Mephone’s reluctance to revive her, or her own inability to see much of a future for herself, she does not believe she can come back!!! Angst!!!!! She is hurting so bad I love her <3

And Mepad is an empathy king!! And is probably the least biased against her out of everyone on the island!! And he can see beneath her crumbling exterior!!!! So her self-loathing and regret and everything she’s trying to push down is obvious to him. Of course she doesn’t believe she can be revived. And we see even Taco is surprised and even a bit miffed by this!!! Aside from Mic to a lesser extent, Mepad is the only person who can really see through her facade. Mic did try, and saw that Taco was hiding things, don’t get me wrong, but Taco was much more stable at that point and shut Mic’s attempts to see underneath her image down much harder than she is able to do during the song.

And Mepad plainly spells out what she’s feeling. This is so important to why she opens up to him more in the next verse. Not only can she not hide her emotions from him, because he already knows, but having it spelled out like that means she can’t keep hiding it from herself either. She can’t ignore her feelings when they’re being clearly stated back to her. So all that she’s been pushing down comes springing right back up in the next verse!!!! She has to physically turn away from him and cross her arms in a final attempt to keep herself closed off, keep anyone from looking in, but after everything she just can’t do it anymore.

["Clear the slate, start again",

Are you hearing how preposterous that sounds?

How do you not comprehend that for someone with my MONSTROUS BACKGROUND,

the whole slate has fallen apart!]

Oh my god guys Taco is being honest about her feelings it’s happening guys it’s happening!!!!! She’s turned away from Mepad for the first two lines, but as she really opens up to him, she turns back around, and gets louder along with the music. And we have Taco be like, the most emotionally open we see her!!! She’s putting Mepad’s rather succinct evaluation of her feelings into her own words. She doesn’t just think she can’t change or have a new start, she finds the notion preposterous!!! Forgiveness is inconceivable to her!!! Inconceivable!!! I can’t emphasize enough that this is the first time Taco has ever emotionally opened up to anyone ever and it is her telling Mepad that she is evil, unable to change, and will never be forgiven. We really get a feel for how everything has been weighing down on her for years, and how everything has built up to a point that she really can’t take it anymore!! But she doesn’t believe there’s any chance of a happy ending for her. Not only the whole slate, but her entire life has fallen apart!! She has lost everything and is fully confident she will never get anything back!!!

[Taco, that is not true.

There are other ways to-

It's too late-

It's not too late,

For me to restart!]

Mepad coming in trying to help <3 Notice how he comes in while she’s still holding the previous note!! He is immediately refuting her idea that she’s irredeemable!! He does the same to refute her when she says it’s too late!!! He is very concerned for her and trying to convince her that it’s not too late for her. He’s trying to tell her there are other options, that she’s not so far gone, but this sort of ends up backfiring, since not only does she not listen to him when he says these things but his interjection ends up snapping her out of the state of emotional vulnerability, and she pulls her facade right back up. Taco saying it’s too late for her kind of breaks my heart honestly, I love it when my blorbo is in pain don’t get me wrong but ow, my taco it’s gonna be okay I love you. She really sees no redemption or even future for herself, and at her lowest she’s finally expressed that to someone!!! Which is a very important step to healing!!!! She accidentally started the healing process by talking about her issues. I mean, she backpedals immediately, but still!!!! Great job Taco <3 And at the end of this line we head into Mepad’s face!! Because there’s a shift from Taco’s feelings to her pushing him away, literally and figuratively, after that moment of vulnerability!! The audience is going with Mepad, at the moment, chasing after Taco!!!

[But it's not I, its they,

Who deign to play this game, so,

Cruel and inhumane, base and uncouth,]

AND HERE COMES TACO WITH THE IMMEDIATE SUBJECT CHANGE!! She just did her first ever emotional vulnerability, and as per her usual strategy with her emotions she’s hard changing the subject!!! In this case, back to the final four and the game!!! She’s deflecting back on to both of them in quick succession trying to get a topic that isn’t her to stick! She is quite literally walking away from the topic in the visuals too!! She’s trying to get away from Mepad, who is trying to keep them on the subject of Taco’s feelings, looks back at him angrily when he keeps talking about it, and then is even more angry when he keeps going, before storming away from him again!!!

[Let us talk about it when your,

head is not so clouded. You're no,

menace, Taco, how did they hurt you?

Please think this through]

Mepad is trying to get her to go back to that emotional vulnerability!!! He wants to help her, he wants to talk through her issues with her rather than watching her self-destruct!!! I think this is where the idea that running the Truth or Flare challenge will help her comes from, too. He can tell she’s vulnerable, despite how hard she’s trying not to be, and she is talking things out, in a way, during ToF!! In a healthy way, no, but it’s Taco so we need to take what we can get. As he says, he’d rather do it when Taco has calmed down, taken a moment to not bury her feelings and even gets recovered, maybe. And here we get to a very important line!! Mepad asks her how they hurt her!!!! I genuinely don’t think Taco’s been asked this, yeah? Her whole schtick is supposed to be that she is the villain, she hurts people, not how she’s been hurt herself! And dare I say, me, the biggest Taco apologist and forehead kisser you ever did see, they have hurt her. She’s seen every other person who’s hurt the others be let into the hotel and accepted into the group, yeah? Balloon was accepted, after quite a bit of effort on his part. No one really seemed to care that Knife had killed Marsh for fun, Taco mentioning it in episode 13 as they’re arguing. Nickel and Taco are relatively similar in personality, but Nickel seemed to have relatively free reign to asshole all he wanted until Suitcase snapped at him, and even then it was just Suitcase who was angry with him. But not her. She hasn’t apologized to Pickle in person, at this point, but she had sent letters. She’d at least tried to contact him, and while he was well within his rights to ignore her, I can’t really blame her for not wanting to go inside the hotel either. Not to mention, Taco has been watching them all very closely, at least for the duration of the second season and likely after the first as well, for her to have found out about the second season and to have begun scheming so quickly. So every time they’ve spoken about her, every insult and awkward silence after someone mentions her name, she’s heard. That’s got to hurt!! Taco is very much not perfect and I don’t really blame the others for not reaching out to her given she hadn’t decided to make a change yet, but it also can’t be easy to make a change for the better when you are homeless in the woods!! Mic and Mepad’s willingness to help her is what really convinced her change would be good and possible, she hadn’t had anyone else reach out to her before, and to be fair, she folds pretty damn quickly in the grand scheme of things. Mic showed her she was likable as a person, and Mepad showed her she was redeemable, and with that support she is doing her best now!!! Anyways. Uh. There’s still one more line!! Mepad is pleading with Taco not to make things worse for herself, because taking over the challenge and such is only going to make them think she hasn’t changed at all and feed into the persona he knows is a sham in shambles at this point! Talking it out with him would be a much better way to do this!!! But alas, she’s dead set.

[I think they're too afraid to,

Bear the bed they've made,

Can't bring themselves to face the awful truth.]

TACO & THE AWFUL TRUTH that she’s projecting. Yeah Taco is the one who is afraid to actually face her mistakes, the people she’d hurt. Though, she probably sees her isolation as doing so, yeah? She’s hurt people, so she has to be alone as punishment, even though that doesn’t give anyone closure. However! As for the awful truth, yeah, Taco really is one of the only ones who’s looked the competition in the eyes for everything it is and spat on it. She’s motivated by a lot of complicated feelings she tries not to feel, but she sees the game for what it is, and how it hurts the contestants involved!! And the final four are yet to take that look, until she gets everything laid out in front of them!!

[Feeling double-crossed is part of,

Dealing with a loss, yes, but the,

Healing is a process, that's the truth]

FEELING DOUBLE-CROSSED this line is also important because!! Taco does feel betrayed by Mic!! She feels guilty and blames herself for what happened, yes, but she still does feel that sting of betrayal, since Mic left her, yeah? Oh her part, she’d finally accepted Mic as her first true friend, someone who liked her for who she was and she liked being around, and almost immediately Mic left her. A lot of that is on Taco, don’t get me wrong, but from Taco’s end she still doesn’t even fully understand why Mic was mad at her!! She thinks it was all because of her getting violent, not because she didn’t listen to Mic. My low empathy queen is still struggling to fully grasp Mic’s motivations, her first friend that she could act “normal” around, so of course she’d feel betrayed! Taco is dealing with a loss!!!!!!!!! And she is NOT healing!! She is trying to push it down like always, but it’s become too much for her!!! And Mepad is telling her that healing is a process because it’s so much for her at the moment!! He’s trying to communicate that she’s going to feel better eventually, that she needs help and time to do so, instead of rushing into another scheme!!! He’s telling her the truth, that healing is possible!!! But as Taco rejects his pleas for her to reconsider and grabs him, we shift back into reality. Taco is unconvinced, and they’re more or less at square one, with Taco’s mask for the rest of the world securely back in place.

Everyone look at this shot RIGHT NOW I’m going to explode. All these cracks come from the ii logo that Taco stomped on, yeah? And those cracks in the game spread, and create the cracks in her. She has been broken by the game!!! Look at her face! Does she look whole and happy to you? I didn’t think so. And here we have Taco close to the camera, looking out towards the viewer, to illustrate how although she’s separate from the game, more of a spectator than the player anymore, she’s still trapped inside the competition that’s broken her!! And we have Mepad in the background, further away with his position as an assistant!! The cracks are all around him rather than through him, because he’s not being hurt by the game!! He’s not a competitor!! But the game is crumbling everything around him. He’s watched everything, just like Taco has!! Every betrayal, every fight this season, Mepad has been watching. And the more he’s been seeing, the more he’s been feeling, and the more he’s been able to see how the game tears people apart and breaks them, just like it’s broken Taco.

[So I'm turning up the heat to "sauté",

I've a beef to get grilled,

But I fully guarantee that today all the beans that get spilled,

Won't be mine, no I'm fine,

Shhhh...

Now it's time…]

Guys I think Taco might not be fine. She’s shoved her facade right up and has closed herself back off, moving to continue with her plot. She’s going to grill the final four and 100% not get upset or feel any feelings, nope. Of course this is not what happened, and from Taco’s facial expression when she claims to be fine she has a hunch it’s not going to be so easy. She knows and has acknowledged to herself that she is not okay, which is a big step, but she still stuck in her ways in terms of ignoring it in favor of playing the role she’s been designated. Her mask is cracked, her confidence is transparent, but she’s still acting. Mepad is still trying to help her here, but she physically silences him. Not literally, per say, as turning him invisible wouldn’t stop him from talking, but she shushes him and he gets the memo. The window to convince her to stop has closed, and she’s going forth with her plan regardless of how well she is.

THANK YOU FOR READING!!!!!! <3 I HOPE YOU ENJOYED!!! I REALLY HOPE THIS DIDN’T SUCK. IT TOOK A WHILE TO WRITE SO IF IT SUCKS THAT SUCKS FOR ME. HOPEFULLY I DIDN’T MISS TOO MUCH. THROW TOMATOES AT ME IF I DID (i will be sad). GIVE ME COOKIES IF NOT (joy inducers).

#inanimate insanity #ii taco #taco ii #ii mepad #mepad ii #fuck it #tacopad #tw suicidal ideation #loomy's analysis #loomy's metas #loomy's tired after this it was 12 pages #mic ii #ii mic #pickle ii #ii pickle #ii 15 #taco's tirade

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thesimmermo · 3 days ago

Text

Season 2, Episode 9

TW: Sickness and Mention of Death

It's Hard To Accept

Saturday finally rolls around and Morgan is dreading the day. They spent the entire night at a football game supporting Drew cheer and when she got home, she could barely sleep. Her heart has been heavy.

She finally manages to peel herself from her pillow and go into her kitchen to start prepping her meal for this evening. All of her kids will be in town and she is excited that they can all be together.

Morgan: What is DJ's favorite again? Morgan: What is Deck allergic too? Morgan: FUCK ME! I can't remember.

She sighs and takes a deep breath. Tears fill the wells of her eyes and she wipes them away quickly. She turns a few pages in her journal and finds the list of her kids favorites. She walks into the kitchen and does what she loves to do: Cook.

Hours past and soon she had the full spread out and ready for the kids to arrive. Fried Chicken, Rice, Potatoes, Collard Greens, and Macaroni all awake their hungry mouths.

They all come in and greet her. DJ stares at her and can immediately see that something is off. She hugs each of them tightly and they sit down.

Morgan feels a wave of dizziness fall over her and she pauses before she joins them.

Dallas: You okay ma? Morgan: *smiles* That's what I wanted to talk to everyone about. DJ: About what? Dirk: *sighs* Be patient. Your mother will tell you. Let her speak. Morgan: I have cancer.

The room goes silent and there are so many different emotions running throughout the room. She presses her lips together and waits for questions but there are none. She then breaks down everything that the has happened over the past few months and explained the overall prognosis.

Daze: Mommy, you can't have canc... Mommy... Morgan: I'm so sorry you all. But I do. DJ: So, you're doing treatment right? You're going to be okay, right? Morgan: *shakes her head and shrugs* I've been doing treatment for months now... My body isn't accepting it. Denim: What the fuck? Daze: *crying* Decklin: *angry* Morgan: I... *holds back tears* I've tried. I'm going to keep trying and keep doing what I have to but.. if my body doesn't react, I have 2 months.

DJ: There's no way. Ma, that can't be true. Dirk: It is. The doctor told her Monday. Daze: That's not fucking fair! You do right by people and, and, and you always treat people good. Why you? Why you when there are so many bad people in the world? Morgan: *Smiles through tears* There isn't a limit on who a disease can affect, Daze.

Morgan glances at Drew who has barely spoken. She's shaking and her face is pale as though she's seen a ghost.

Dallas: This isn't fair. So what are we supposed to do? Morgan: *Sighs and cries* Accept it. Live your life. Everything happens for a reason. It's life, sweetheart. Decklin: Dang, ma. DJ: So, we're just supposed to just be okay with you being gone? Morgan: You'll never be "okay" with it but you can and will learn to manage it, DJ.

Daze slams his hands down and pushes away from the table.

Daze: Ma, this is bullshit! This ain't fair. We can't lose you. You're going to miss so much! I can't listen to this. It's not right.

Dallas: Daze, calm down.

Morgan: *Cries and stares at him*

Dirk: Daze, I know you're upset. We all are.

Daze: *Sobs*

Morgan: *smiles through the tears* Oh baby, I am so sorry. This is not how I wanted this to be. I promise you all. I will keep fighting. I will fight until I can't but I need you all to promise me something. All 7 of you in this room. Denim: Anything mama. Morgan: *sighs* Promise me that you will not let my, death.. DJ: Ma, please. Morgan: Listen! Do not let my death prevent you from accomplishing any of your dreams. Go out there and be the best that you can be. If I am not here physically, I am still here spiritually and in love. Don't dwell in that sadness too long. Go out and live.

The room goes silent as Dirk and Morgan move from kid to kid trying to comfort them. As the older kids start to leave, Morgan notices that Drew is no longer in the room. She goes into the living room and finds her sitting on the couch. Morgan sits next to her and pulls her in.

Drew: How did I not see it? How did I not know? Morgan: Shhhh, none of this is your fault. Even if you saw and knew, there is nothing that you could do and baby girl, that is okay. Drew: Mommy, I don't know what I'm going to do without you. I'm getting sick thinking about it. Morgan: You're going to be fine. You got 7 knuckleheads in the kitchen looking after you and a knucklehead across town to look after you too. Mama will always be here... You just won't be able to see me. Drew: Mommy, mommy, mommy. I love you. Morgan: *wipes away a tear* I love you too baby girl.

#sims4 #sims 4 gameplay #sims 4 screenshots #the sims 4 #sims #the sims #simblr #sims 4 #sims community #thesims #the sims community #ts4 simmer #ts4 #ts4 gameplay #ts4 simblr #ts4 legacy #ts4 screenshots

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curiositydoorunlocked · 2 days ago

Text

That post I made about S4 pushing Will’s sadness was one made in jest. It was just a little joke post. I clicked the “post” button, closed the tab in my browser, and moved on with my very serious life. No more jokes for me.

But then something happened; permit me tell you a little story entitled “I spent too much time on YouTube, send help.”

…okay, now I’m done with the jokes 😅

In all seriousness, though: I’ve been watching a lot of ST reactions on YouTube lately and they’ve only served to show me just how effective that “WILL IS SAD! WILL IS SAD!” strategy was.

For real! Of course I haven’t seen all the S4 reaction videos out there, but I’ve watched far too many to reach my weekly screen-time goal, ugh plenty, and the trends were pretty damning. Every single creator I saw said “poor Will!” at least once during their watch. More often than not it was multiple times, actually. They were all rooting for him, feeling for him; they all saw his sadness, put the pieces together re: why he was sad (relatively) quickly, and went “No! Stop! I don’t like that Will is sad!”

This attitude was generally present across the whole season’s worth of reactions, but there are still some interesting takeaways re: what people responded to most that I’d like to share with you all.

First off the cartop talk in the desert seemed to resonate across the board. It wasn’t always included in videos, probably because it was a quieter scene sandwiched in between the gang literally burying a body, but when it was included it usually got a big response. Lots of nods and empathetic comments made at “…because what if…what if they don’t like the truth?” The van scene also hit hard for everyone, and I mean everyone. My personal favorite was this one dude that teared up and said something along the lines of “We’re only ten minutes into this episode, chill out!” while wiping his eyes!

Most of the reactors had a much stronger response to the Mike and Will scenes—and the associated Will sadness moments, of course—than they did the Mike and El scenes. Those elicited more frustration than anything—plenty of “God, why can’t you just say it, Mike??”s. One woman even gasped when Mike threw away the “From, El” note.

People smiled at the few cute moments El and Mike had; they empathized with El’s insecurities; they sighed at Mike’s hamfisted maneuvering.

What they didn’t do? Seem, well… invested. In the relationship. At all.

Even the cooing over Mike and El’s (very sweet) reunion was frequently overshadowed by joy at El and Will’s fraternal hug.

(It’s almost like putting something last telegraphs to the audience that it’s the most important…crazy how that works!)

But to wrap things up before this post gets too long…

I know “the talented creators of this historically well-written show decided to take the story in a particular direction and executed it such that it achieved the desired response from viewers” isn’t exactly a shocking revelation. Even still, it was nice to see, especially considering the following:

Most of these reactors were confident Will’s feelings wouldn’t be returned. The opinions were never phrased cruelly; they were always more along the lines of “it’s so sad that Will is in this situation, poor guy. I wish he could be happy but it doesn’t seem possible.”

In an odd roundabout way, those nervous, “where is this going to go?” vibes are omnipresent on Byler Tumblr too. (Or at least that’s the sense I’ve been getting since I returned from my hiatus—apologies if I’ve terribly mischaracterized you all!) I get that a lot of people are worried about the potential execution of a Mike/Will relationship, especially because the characters involved are so intertwined with the supernatural plot. We may see the writing on the wall re: the destination, but that doesn’t mean we know exactly what the journey will look like.

But guess what? These writers know how to disengage the audience from a couple that isn’t working, and engage it in a dynamic that is. They know how to stir up empathy for characters in different contexts. They know how to bring new information—in this case, Will’s feelings—to light and get people on board ASAP. These reaction videos are very encouraging proof of that—and in case it needs repeating, I watched so many of them, so I should know. (Why? God only knows.)

If these reactors were presented with a solution to this “problem” that would allow Will to get what he wanted without hurting anyone else… well, I’m confident they would jump right on board. And so would we, of course.

So, all of that is to say I encourage you to set the nitty gritty of it all aside every now and then. As a bunch of Youtubers have kindly demonstrated for us: everything’s going to be just fine 🙂

(And if you read this long for what was essentially just a positivity post, I commend you LOL. Thanks for sticking it out with me!)

#This may not be most revolutionary post but I had a good time watching all these videos and I wanted to share that with the community LOL #will byers #byler #byler positivity #st4 #stranger things #long post #my st commentary #mine

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ace-does-words · 3 days ago

Text

purple (like a heartbeat)

wherein Lance gets synesthesia, Keith is selectively mute, and everyone's voice is too much to deal with

Ao3 Port: https://archiveofourown.org/works/62344717

All of Lance's sensations feel utterly frazzled. Like he's just been pulled up from under the water, nearly drowned. And in a sense that is what had happened, except, instead of water it was plant nectar.

He had slipped on a petal and went careening into the pit of sugary syrup. He didn't mean to swallow any of it, he swears! Some just flushed up his nostrils and when he gasped, flooded through his systems. He's beyond thankful Shiro and Pidge were there to pull him up before too long.

"Lance, are you okay?"

He's still coughing up bright blue when Pidge asks the question. They sound like, they kinda sound like the way limes taste on fresh fish. When the sharpness of the seasoning comes through, when he takes a bite which was doused in far too much. That's what they sound like.

Lance nodded. He tried to reread the words Shiro starts to speak as they whirled around the front of his eyes. Just to make sure he heard right. He tastes copper when he hears the distant hum of machinery, The Lions. It's a bloody taste on the back of his tongue.

When he opens his eyes to look at his friends he feels, really overwhelmed. Their words keep wrapping themselves around his line of vision as they talk to him in tart, tangy tones. Even when he closes his eyes the strings of language won't go away. The tingly sensation all over his insides won't stop either.

"Can you guys just, shut up?"

They ask why.

"Please?"

Both Shiro and Pidge quiet down.

Lance opens his eyes and he just sees the world as it is again. Whatever was in that nectar is messing him up, that he's certain of.

Pidge opens their mouth to speak.

"Go ahead," Lance said.

"We should talk to Allura about this," Pidge offered in a tone that tasted sour despite the sweetness of the notion. It was a jarring contrast, Lance didn't know why he was so sure that's what it tasted like though. That if he took a bite of a delicious piece of fish doused in citrus, he'd think of Pidge's voice.

Lance nodded, "No shit."

-/-/-/-

"Ah," Allura started with once Lance had finished explaining his symptoms to her.

Her voice was nice for Lance to listen to. Even more so then usual.

Hers tasted like candy canes and smelled like fresh pine and felt like crisp winter evenings.

Lance nodded along, taking note of the cursive font of her words. He wonders if she knows that's what her voice looks like. A beautiful handwritten script in a language he does not know, even if she is speaking one he does. It's beautiful, he could never recreate it well enough to show her though.

She speaks again.

He nods along slowly, letting the comfortable sensation wash over him. The scent of cracked pine needles wraps around him so easily. That cool wash of the winter air puts him on edge just right, she sounds like home in ways he could never describe.

He has to ask her again what the deal is because he was too caught up looking at her words to focus on the auditory input. The taste of candy cane was overwhelming in truth, a constant peppermint sting to the tongue. It went well with the pine and way a cold snap smelled, but in general it was a distraction.

"You're a synesthete."

Lance blinks. "A what now?"

"The flower you fell in, a variant of the Puya alpestris, has nectar with psychoactive properties."

"I doubt they're super psychoactive, not to humans at least. I'm not seeing swirly colors everywhere, I'm not tripping out, Allura."

"Lance, tell me, what flavor am I?"

"Peppermint."

Lance didn't even have a chance to think before he spoke. He just spoke. And he was right. Her voice tasted like peppermint with sugary undertones, like a candy cane you'd buy for pennies. Or a peppermint swirl you'd find laying around at a lobby. It paired perfectly with the scent of pine and winter that rode along the aftershock of her voice, but she only wanted to know her flavor.

"Psychoactive properties activate the mind, Lance, this nectar activates the parts that register senses. It blends the receptors, you'll be mixing and matching senses for a while."

Lance nodded. "Meaning...?"

"You have synesthesia."

"Oh. How long is it gonna last?"

"Depends how much got into your stomach."

"I think most of it got into my lungs."

Allura goes awkwardly quiet.

Lance picks up it'll last longer without a word needing to be said.

-/-/-/-

"Allura says I have synesthesia," Lance said.

Keith gestured, as if to say go on.

"She wants me to stay with you until it goes away so I don't get overstimulated."

"Why?"

Lance enjoys the lack of sensation that comes with the way Keith aggressively signs the word.

"You've got that mutism, right? No words, no synesthesia triggers."

"Selective," Keith harshly corrects, "I wasn't always like this."

"Right, there was something that screwed you into thinking it'd be safer to be quiet, or something like that," Lance said.

Keith nodded hesitantly.

"Can I stay with you?"

"How long?"

"I don't know, Allura's still crunching numbers."

"Fine."

-/-/-/-

The lack of triggers brings Lance a nice sort of peace.

When Keith turns on music he's kind enough to turn on music that tastes like chocolate. Well, not exactly chocolate. But it is smooth, the taste is nice, doesn't grate him the same way the sound of The Lion's mechanisms did. Those tasted burnt and bloody.

Keith does make him sleep on the couch though. Even if they are trying to make something work he's still relegated to the couch. Why that is, Keith doesn't bother explaining. He just crosses his arms and gives a little huffy sort of sound.

It doesn't last long enough for Lance to catch a taste or a smell or a feeling. Isn't even a voice either. Hell, he barely caught it at all.

He does find a nice cozy feeling that washes over him at the white noise that Keith flicks on before heading to bed. Feels like a blanket, enhances the feeling of the pre-existing plush fabric he's wrapped in. The soft whir over top the oceanic waves almost reminds him of home, more then that reminds him of a caramel rich taste. It lingers on his tongue as he tries to sleep.

-/-/-/-

Pidge's voice won't stop tasting like citrus. Their font is blocky. They talk a lot, it's far too easy for their to be too much in his eyes to focus on what they're saying. Kinda like, big blocks of text, with an inky black typeface.

"Pidge, Pidge slow down."

Pidge does exactly that.

"Thanks. You talk a lot."

"I do?" The citrus sting rolls over Lance's tongue and he already feels way too over saturated in sour to even make much of it. They're all lime and lemon and fish, no sweet citrus notes in her flavor palate, like oranges.

Lance nodded. "You sound blocky."

"Blocky?"

"Yeah, your words. They taste like sour and look like pixels."

Pidge cocks their head to the side.

"Get me some paper and I'll show you."

-/-/-/-

Hunk has the nicest voice by far.

Whenever he speaks Lance smells bark and rain. A cacophony of forest scents.

He tastes like phthalo green.

And Lance seizes up at the notion because what the fuck. Colors don't taste like anything. How could Hunk's voice taste like a color.

But Hunk speaks again and there it is, that rich taste washing over Lance's body. It rolls through him easily, dripping down his spine. The flavor and the scent all pair so nicely with the way ribbons of his words cascade down the sides of Lance's vision. The letters are all so pretty, completely different to his clunky handwriting.

"Your voice..."

Hunk stops speaking.

"It's good! Don't stop talking."

Hunk gives a small sigh of relief before continuing in prattling on about cooking.

"Your voice smells like a forest."

"It what?"

"Tastes like green."

Again, Hunk's reply is perplexed.

Lance just groans. "It's hard to explain, but, you ever been hiking? Like, on Earth I mean. After it rains, when the entire forest smells kinda damp and mossy?"

"Course I have."

"That's your voice. That's what your voice smells like, and it's phthalo green on my tongue."

"Riiiiight, you still want some food?" Hunk really does not get any of what Lance is going on about. Sure, he understands the idea that voices can have qualities, but he doesn't understand how his could taste like green. Especially phthalo green, maybe a more olive green he could understand.

"Totally."

-/-/-/-

After a couple nights of bunking with Keith, Lance is allowed to sleep in the same bed.

Keith's heartbeat is purple.

The kind of purple they crushed snail shells for. The kind of rich hue that only royals wore a long time ago. The shade that you'd look at think it tastes like grapes.

But when Lance hears Keith's heartbeat all he feels is tyrian purple. How he feels a color he couldn't tell you. How a heartbeat is making him feel purple he also couldn't explain. The nectar still rolling through his blood could probably help explain it.

He sees sparkles at the corners of his eyes as Keith hums. They're silvery hues, almost a snowy white to them. He's drawing. Lance watches as he does so, head rested tentatively on his chest.

"What color should the eyes be?"

The pomegranate's and the magenta and the satin silk quality of Keith's voice swallow up Lance's senses entirely. It throws him into a little bit of a daze. He hopes Keith didn't notice him freeze up, he's grasping desperately for the sensation to linger all over him, it was delicious. The ribbons of his words fade out as fast as they fade in.

"You can talk?" Lance asked.

"I didn't want to sign all that, besides I'd have to move you if I did," Keith answered with and Lance feels like he's drowning in such a delectable sensation. All shimmery like red velvet and sparkly when he speaks. It causes Lance's vision to burst with glitter at the edges, spilling into his main field of view. If it weren't Keith it'd feel suffocating.

Lance nodded. He was swimming in Keith's everything. Felt good. It paired nicely with the purple of his heartbeat.

"I'll ask again," Keith said.

Lance has a hard time not feeling drunk in the overload that Keith's voice is. He's never heard it before. It behaves completely differently to everyone elses, makes him see things that aren't exactly there. Makes him taste things he's never liked much in his entire life.

"What color should the eyes be?" Keith asks it earnestly.

"Purple," Lance answered with, "Your heartbeat is purple."

"Dark?"

"Royal."

-/-/-/-

Even after the nectar had fully faded out of him he still understood the qualities.

Sure, he couldn't really taste it the same way, but he still knew it.

As much as he knew the sky was blue he knew Allura's voice tasted like candy canes and Hunk's voice smelled like petrichor and Pidge was citrus down to their core. He doubts he could ever forget it even if he'll never make those connections so vividly again. Sure, they still occur, just not as strongly as they did when he was fresh on the nectar. Part of him wonders if the synesthesia is a permanent effect, one that considerably weakens over time, but a permanent thing regardless.

Whether it is or isn't he still finds a comforting purple in Keith's heartbeat when they bunk together.

#vld #voltron #keith x lance #klance #voltron fanfic #vld fanfic #keith kogane #lance mcclain #pidge holt #hunk garrett #my words #fanfiction

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giggle-guru · 5 hours ago

Text

Okay guys…this is my longest and most intricate audio yet! I’ve got a little bit of everything going on and I really hope that the additional audio is more immersive and not too overwhelming! I absolutely adored this one and I really hope you guys enjoyed it. Please please give me some feedback on it in regards to if you found this to be too much, too little, etc etc! I thrive off of your comments because they help me improve and cater them better to all of your needs! Now enjoy some Huskerdust with a lil wrecked Husker (and if any of you catch my reference in the audio you’ve got to let me know hehe…)

The cover art was made by @giggly-tickles whom I adore, so go send them some love! Below the cut with the script you can find the full version, or go check out their Tumblr! Thank you so much you’re a legend 😭

Script and artwork below the cut!

[Visual Note: Husker is at the bar, finishing up a long shift. He grumbles as he sweeps up his feathers from behind the bar once again, wings twitching in irritation. Angel Dust sits across from him at the bar.]

[Audio Note: Sweeping, various bar sound effects.]

Angel Dust: [eyebrow raised] Damn Husky. What’s goin’ on with ya feathers? Ya sheddin’ ‘em like crazy! I ain’t ever seen you sweep up so many before. You goin’ bald?

Husk: [eye roll] S’ none of yer business, Angie.

Angel Dust: [pouting] Aw, c’mon Whiskers! Ya can’t blame me for noticin’. I mean, it’s hard not to when there’s a whole bird’s nest behind the bar. Seriously, ya sick or somethin’?

Husk: [gruff] I said drop it. It’s nothin’ you need to worry about. And stop calling me Whiskers.

Angel Dust: [mock gasp] Oh, excuse me, Baby Cakes! Didn’t know we were touchy tonight. Now spill. Can’t always be on my ass ‘bout talking feelings and not tell me what’s goin’ on.

Husk: [sighs, rubbing his temples] I’m not touchy, Ang. Just… tired, alright? Look, I’m almost done closing up shop for to night. Why don’t you just go to our room and I’ll meet you there?

Angel Dust: [grumbling] Fine. But I’m gonna figure you out, one way or anotha. And don’t take too long, old man. I get lonely without ya.

[Visual Note: Angel walks away to their shared room, muttering to himself.]

[Audio Note: Footsteps, fading bar noise, quietly additional approaching footsteps]

Angel Dust: There’s gotta be somethin’ goin’ on. Sure, he’s grumpy as Hell, but he’s never like this. Maybe I gotta look somethin’ up or-

[Visual Note: Angel, lost in thought, stumbles into Lucifer.]

[Audio Note: Stumble. Footsteps pause.]

Angel Dust: Shit-! [glancing down] Didn’t see ya there Short King. My bad.

Lucifer: [scoff] It’s hard to see where you’re walking when you’re too busy talking to yourself. What’s going on?

Angel Dust: [waving him off] It’s nothin’, okay? Husky is just…actin' weird tonight. Like, extra weird. Feels like there’s somethin’ off with him, y’know?

Lucifer: [slight grin] Eh. Shocker. I get where he’s coming from.

Angel Dust: [confused] Shocker? Whaddya mean, shocker?

Lucifer: [brow raised] It’s molting season, Angel. It’s a natural process. Happens to demons with avian traits every so often. They shed old feathers to make room for new ones. I thought you two had something going on. Hasn’t he told you? Alastor uh…[clearing throat] helped me out last night.

Angel Dust: [eyes widen, realization dawning] Wait, what? Moltin' season? So that’s what’s been goin' on with him? [pauses] Why the hell didn’t he say anything? I coulda helped!

Lucifer: I mean preening is pretty…[clearing throat] I mean everyone’s wings are different.

Angel Dust: [squinting, smirking] Ohhhh, preenin’, huh? Is that what we’re callin’ it these days? What’d Alastor do, Luce, give ya a little feather massage?

Lucifer: [flustered, clearing throat] Ahem! I’m simply saying molting requires a certain… level of ca re. Especially for demons like Husk. It can be…uncomfortable.

Angel Dust: [laughing, leaning on the wall] Oh, I bet it can be. Don’t worry, Lucifer, your secret’s safe with me. Now I’m just wonderin’ how I’m supposed to handle my grumpy feather duster.

Lucifer: [irritated] I’d suggest you focus on your own partner instead of my affairs, Angel. Husk is stubborn, but I’m sure you’ll figure it out.

Angel Dust: [snickering] Sure, sure. Thanks for the tip, Baby Cakes.

Lucifer: [grimacing] Don’t call me that.

[Visual Note: Angel walks back to his shared room with Husk with a newfound confidence and plan - convincing Husker to let him help. He scoops Fat Nuggets up and lays on the bed with him.]

[Audio Note: Footsteps, door opening, door closing, pig oinking, bed squeaking]

Angel Dust: Fat Nuggets, baby! [leaning down to pet him, babytalking] We’re gonna help out ya daddy…yes we are…gonna get rid of that grumpy lil face-

[Audio Note: Door opening]

[Visual Note: Husk steps into the room still looking disheveled his wings twitching slightly as he glances at Angel and Fat Nuggets on the bed.]

Husk: [gruff] What’re you doin’? You havin’ a one-on-one with the pig about me now?

Angel Dust: [grinning, still petting Fat Nuggets] Maybe. He’s a good listener, y’know? And he doesn’t hide things from me unlike somebody I know.

Husk: [sighs] I ain’t in the mood for jokes, Angie. I’m beat.

Angel Dust: [patting the bed] C’mere, Husky. Sit your feathered ass down.

Husk: [narrowing his eyes] What’re you up to?

Angel Dust: [innocently] Who, me? Nothin’! Just thought we could have some quality time. Y’know, talk about stuff. Like…molting.

[Visual Note: Husk crawls into bed beside Angel]

[Audio Note: Bed squeaking]

Husk: [groaning] Dammit, Angel, I shoulda known you’d get it outta someone. Was it Lucifer?

Angel Dust: [snickering] Maybe. Short King’s got loose lips. [softly] Why didn’t ya just tell me, Husky? You don’t gotta deal with this on your own, y’know.

Husk: [shrugs, avoiding eye contact] Didn’t wanna make a big deal outta it. It’s just molting. Happens every so often, no biggie.

Angel Dust: [crawling over to him, kneeling in front of the chair] No biggie? Babe, you’ve been grumpier than usual, and I’m pretty sure you’ve been hidin’ how bad it’s buggin’ ya. C’mon, let me help.

Husk: [hesitating, wings twitching slightly] I don’t need help, Angie. It’s messy and…kinda embarrassing, alright? I don’t want ya seein’ me like this.

Angel Dust: [softly, reaching out to brush a stray feather off Husk’s shoulder] Husky, you’re actin’ like I haven’t already seen you at your worst. Hell, I practically live for the mess. Besides, isn’t that what we do? Look out for each other? You’ve seen me way past rock bottom before.

Husk: [sighing] You’re not going to let this one go, are ya Legs?

Angel Dust: [smirking] Not a chance. Now, lay down and let me get a closer look at those wings of yours. Trust me, I got magic hands.

[Visual Note: Husk hesitates, then finally gives in, lying down on the bed with his wings slightly spread out. Angel Dust grabs a soft brush from the nightstand and starts inspecting Husk’s feathers.]

[Audio Note: Soft rustling of feathers, gentle brushing sounds]

Angel Dust: [teasing] Damn, Husky, these wings are somethin’ else. Big, strong, and goddamn they need my TLC.

Husk: [gruffly] Shut it, Ang. Just do whatever you’re gonna do and quit yappin’- [few giggles]

[Visual Note: Angel continues gently moving around and picking apart the feathers, though now Husk begins to squirm]

Angel Dust: [teasing, mischievous] Ohhh, Husky. What’s this? You’re really jumpy tonight. Don’t tell me you’ve got ticklish wings.

Husk: [gruff, trying to stay composed] No. Obviously not. Just… finish the damn job, Angie.

Angel Dust: [grinning] Uh-huh. Sure. [deliberately brushing the sensitive area of Husk’s wing again] What about here? Oh, wait— there?

Husk: [giggling despite himself] Angie, cut it out.

Angel Dust: [laughing, feigning innocence] Cut what out? Babe, I’m just tryin’ to help you! You’re makin’ it real hard to focus with all that twitchin’.

Husk: [trying not to laugh] You know damn well what you’re doin’!

Angel Dust: [grinning wider] Ohhh, this is too good. The big, bad Husky’s got himself some ticklish lil’ wings! C’mon, Whiskers, just admit it—your tough-guy act’s fallin’ apart over here.

Husk: [gasping through his laughter, squirming away] Angie, shut up! You’re pushin’ it now, I swear to—!

Angel Dust: [laughing triumphantly] Oh, I’ve got you now, Husky! And too bad. I’m not stopping till I get all ya loose feathers out of there.

Husk: Shit! Angel, this is why I didn’t want to tell you, you little- [laughter]

Angel Dust: [grinning] You didn’t want to tell me because ya didn’t want me findin’ out ya just a sensitive lil cutie, huh?

Husk: [half-laughing, trying to stay in control] I'm not cute, and you better quit that before I—

Angel Dust: [giggling] Before you what? I’m just helping preen ya, you ought to be thankin’ me. I dunno what I’d do without these extra arms though, ya squirming like a damn worm!

Husk: [laughing] Thank you?! Angel, I didn’t sign up for this! Okay- okay stop it! This is fucking torture!

Angel Dust: [smirking mischievously] Torture? Babe, this is premium wing care—Angel Dust-style. Now quit wiggling. I’m almost done. Then I gotta remind ya where else ya sensitive-

Husk: [laughing] You fucking wish! No way in Hell am I letting you touch me again- ever! No more touching for you!

Angel Dust: [mock gasp] How dare ya revoke my kitty-pettin’ privileges! That’s it!

[Visual Note: Angel finishes preening - for the most part - and flips Husk onto his back]

[Audio Note: blanket movement and wrestling]

Angel Dust: [grinning] Now you’re really in for it Husky. I didn’t know ‘bout ya wings bein’ sensitive but I do know about-

Husk: [panic] Wait wait wait-!

Angel Dust: [laugh] Your hips.

[Visual Note: Angel moves one hand to squeeze his hips]

Husk: [shrieking] Angie! Angie no! You’re gonna kill me with this shit! I can’t breathe! It tickles! Fuck, it’s not funny!

Angel Dust: [laughing, his voice playful] Oh, but it is funny. Look at you, all grumpy and tough, but when I hit these spots? You’re just a cute witty kitty.

Husk: [managing to grab Angel’s wrist, panting slightly through his laughter] I said I’m not cute! If you don’t quit it right now, I will—!

Angel Dust: [smirking, leaning in close] You’ll what, Baby Cakes? You’re too busy laughin’ to do anything. Face it, I’ve gotcha right where I wantcha. Ya clearly ain’t as grumpy as before so I think I did somethin’. And this tummy is lookin’ like it wants some attention too.

Husk: [hissing through his teeth] Angel, fuck, no, no… I’m gonna—

[Visual Note: Husk tries to push Angel’s hand away, but Angel grins wider and gently presses on his stomach again.]

Angel Dust: [teasing] Oh, what’s this? You’re really not gonna— [pauses as Husk lets out a soft, involuntary purr] Ohhh… wait a minute… did you just… purr?

Husk: [flustered, voice strained] I didn’t… I didn’t purr, you little shit. Knock it off! [still giggling]

Angel Dust: [grinning broadly] Uh-huh. Sure, sure. But you did just purr. So ya lyin’ now. Thats a cute mix. Gigglin’ n’ purrin’ for me. [lightly pressing down on his stomach]

[Audio Note: louder purr slipping in]

Husk: [squirming, purring louder] Stop it! I’m serious, Angel! This is—this is—[laughing] okay, okay, I get it, I get it! I give! Angel-!

Angel Dust: Yeah? Admit it then, Whiskers. You love the attention, you loved me preening ya, you love me-

Husk: [laughing harder, eyes almost closing from how much he's squirming] Okay, okay, fine! I admit it! But you’re the worst!

Angel Dust: [laughing] Now that’s more like it! You’re a good sport, Husky. I knew deep down you liked it when I gave ya some care.

Husk: [gruff but still breathless] Oh, you’re so gonna regret this, Legs. You’re not the only one who can dish it out. Especially after all that bullshit.

Angel Dust: [giggling nervously] Wait, wait—hold on! Husky, we can talk about this—!

[Visual Note: Husk starts tickling Angel back, both of them laughing hysterically.]

[Audio Note: Feathers rustling, bedsprings squeaking, and confused pig noises]

Angel Dust: [gasping between laughter] Stop, stop! Okay, okay, I give! Mercy!

Husk: [laughing victoriously] Oh, no. You started this. You’re gettin’ the full treatment now, Angie!

Angel Dust: [gasping, laughing harder] You— [trying to squirm away, but Husk follows his movements] You’re evil! I didn’t think—! Oh God, please—! Mercy!

Husk: [laughing triumphantly] That’s what you get, Legs! I told you, didn’t I? No mercy.

Angel Dust: [gasping between laughs] I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I swear!

Husk: [stopping] That’s what I thought.

[Visual Note: The laughter fades into softer chuckles as they both collapse onto the bed, catching their breath. Husk’s wings relax, and Angel leans against him, still giggling faintly.]

Husk: [after a moment, quietly] Thanks for the help with these damn feathers, Angie.

Angel Dust: [softly] Anytime, Husky. Just don’t forget – you don’t gotta handle stuff alone. I’m here for ya, sheddin’ feathers and all.

Husk: [softly] Just... don’t tell anyone about this, alright? I’m not about to become the soft-hearted sap of the hotel. And I definitely don’t need anyone other then you using this shit against me.

Angel Dust: [whispering] Cross my heart, Husky. This stays between us... and Fat Nuggets. [laughs softly] He’s our little secret keeper.

[Audio Note: Soft oink]

Husk: [chuckling] That he is, huh? You really do know how to make a guy feel... less miserable.

Angel Dust: [grinning] What can I say? It’s one of my many talents. Love ya, Kitten.

Husk: [hum] Love you too, sweetheart.

#guru speaks #hazbin hotel tickling #hazbin hotel tickles #hazbin hotel #Lee!husk #Lee!husker #ler!angel #ler!angel dust #lee!angel dust #ler!husker #tickling #tickle audio #sfw tickling community #SoundCloud

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music-and-magic-1307 · 1 day ago

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In defense of Apple White:

TLDR: Her personality is counter to the themes, we get little of her backstory and what we do get is later in the show, being popular in universe giver her higher expectations for fans.

Okay, Apple White gets a lot of hate for being selfish but tbh I think she and Raven are equally selfish. This also includes a breakdown of the social hierarchy.

Apple is at the top of the social ladder, and on top of that, she’s from the most politically powerful story. Being at the top of a hierarchy gives you an innate privilege and ignorance of the flaws in the society. Essentially, by virtue of birth, she has blinders on, and is treated miles better than Raven.

Social ladder:

Royal Protagonist (Apple, Daring, Briar, Ashlynn)

Non Royal Hero (Hunter, Sparrow)

Non Royal Protagonist (Alastair, Blondie, Cedar)

Noteworthy Side Character (Maddie, Tiny, Farrah)

Villain / Antagonist: (Raven, Lizzie, Faybelle)

We also don’t get much of her background in the show, and what we do get isn’t until the second to last season (Dragon Games)

What we do get explains some of how she acts though. We see her getting a lot of pressure from her mother to be perfect at everything, grades, friends, and popularity. Truly Apple is the epitome of the “Little Miss Perfect” song that went around TikTok.

In the book we also get a story about why she clings to her destiny; at 6 years old she fell into a well. It’s said she was terrified. Page 120 of The Storybook Of Legends “It was the first time in her life that she’d ever felt alone. Or cold. Or really, truly scared.” “Even the scary parts of the Snow White story never scared Apple, because it was known.”

Apple has a LOT of anxiety around the unknown because of this event; which brings me to some of the more meta answer.

The narrative favors Raven.

The moral of Ever After High is individuality, questioning authority, and finding yourself and being authentically you.

This moral is in direct contradiction to Apple’s personality. She is Raven’s foil, and the narrative favors Raven. She is very trusting of the adults around her. (Back to the hierarchy, she has no reason to distrust them. They’ve never been anything but kind and supportive to her, unlike Raven.)

When Milton says that if they don’t sign the book that everyone in the story will “poof” (poof poof). Apple has no reason to doubt him, and again this is where I like the book more, she and Raven go on an adventure to see if it’s a lie.

But in both, Raven is not 100% sure that they won’t poof. She takes a risk (and is correct) but she gambled the lives of more than just her.

Apple is not. In fact. Only thinking of herself when she tried to get Raven to sign, she’s thinking of everyone in their story. She is not always the best at showing it, but Apple cares deeply for her friends and family, and is scared for them.

I would also like to point out that in Dragon Games she is being manipulated by Evil Queen, along with the pressure from her mother. It seems to walk back growth, but again, manipulation.

The show is full of flawed characters, and Apple is no exception. She is far from perfect but so is Raven. (Maddie might be perfect though… eh. Exceptions 🤪)

I would also argue that a character who is treated as popular and perfect in world has more pressure to be good from the audience. (Or cruel such as in Mean Girls and similar media) Apple doesn’t receive any (or very little) negativity from her peers until the Royal/Rebel debate begins. She was never given feedback to better herself. But I think this makes her harder to like by viewers/readers. She’s expected to then be perfect even by the audience.

Idk this was a little messy and all over the place, but while she’s not my favorite character, I don’t think deserves nearly as much hate as she gets.

#ever after high #eah #apple white #raven queen #netflix #the storybook of legends #dragon games #snow white #evil queen

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lesbianashleywilliams · 2 years ago

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CHUUYA NAKAHARA IN "WE ARE BOTH SINNERS"

「 Here, have some lead in your diet! 」

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hauntingblue · 2 months ago

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ARCANE EPISODE 7!!!!

MY GOD I WASNT READY FOR ANY OF THIS!!! WHAT WAS THAT!!!

Also ekko wallpaper I got with my fries lmao

#OH MY GOOOD!!!!!! POWDER AND EKKO!!! AND BENZOOOOOO #ITS LITERALLY WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN OMGG!!!!! POWDER LOOKS SO CUTE 😭😭😭😭 IM CRYING ALREADYYYY #VANDER WITH A BUN!! AND EVERYTHING IS SO FULL OF LIGHT!!! HER EYES!!! MYLO LOOKS SO RIDICULOUS AKDJSK THIS GIRLAAA #“where would you be without her” WELL BUDDY IF YOU KNEW HOW HE IS WITH HER!!! VI IS DEAD????? OR SHE WAS TAKEN FOR THE INCIDENT!!!#LOOK AT WHAT YOU DID JAYCE!!! MY GOD!!! THE GEMS KILLED VI SO THEY JUST COMPLETELY PROHIBITED THEM!!! JAYCE IS IN JAIL PROBABLY!!#the fact we are seeing exactly why jayce should be sorry about what he has done.... and we are seeing him suffer because of it... cinema 🚬#also mel fading into viktor.... also has he realised how she manipulated him in the beggining??? there is so much stuff...#jayce eating contaminated animals and his wound being infected with the arcane too..... is that what will push him....#omg.... ekko likes powder so much... he apologised by painting actual adult vi portraits where the fallen are in his universe 😭😭😭#“she looks so badass” if you knew... is he gonna ask her to help him make hextech.... that is so sick and twisted....#also jayce hurting his leg loke viktor and having to use a cane and brace.... damn and you know whats worse..... that ekko could be like #this with the jinx of his universe IF ISHA HADNT DIED!!! AND IT IS BEACUSE OF JAYCE!! AGAIN!!!!! THIS MAN!!!!!#the drawing with the anomaly and the two men and the inifite symbol... we get it... jayce and viktor forever intertwined by fate....#powder is sensing something is off.... omg time travel..... THE LIMIT IS FOUR SECONDS AFTER HEIMERDINGER EPXLODED ALDHAKSHSKSJSOJSOSLS #i dont want a time travel ending.... if its done for plot to an extent is okay but idk about solving it all.... it makes it feel worhtless #claggor looks so fine its not even funny..... i cant wait to see what everyone thinks. WHERE IS THE LITTLE LADY bc hes called little man 😭#and vander with arm tattoos.... why did they hipster fied him.... he looks younger somehow ajdhakj he went from taking care of 4 kids to 3!#SILCO!!!! AND HE DID TRY TO KILL HIM!! ALSJAKSKAK Ekko just laighing at it.... girl i would be pissed STROMAE??? OMG POWDER!!!!#I JUST REALIZED THE PINK IN HER HAIR IS FOR VI!! AND HER JACKET!! AND A DRESS LIKE HER MOTHER'S!! CRYING!!! FULL BODY CHILLS!!!#CAN WE JUST PRETEND LIKE ITS THE FIRST TIME!!! I GAVE UP ON YOU!!! WHAT HAPPENED BACK THEN I NEED TO KNOW!!! IM SOBBING!!! EKKO!!!!#NOOOOOOO THE ANOMALY NOOOOO!!!! HEIMERDINGER NOOOOO!!!! AND THATS JAYCE!!! IS THAT MAGE VIKTOR???? the monkeys......#the vi toy with the out love song machine.... my god i wasnt expecting any of this i need to breathe i am stil tearing up my god #what a fucking punch in the stomach christ i cant breathe right akdhsksso #the credits saying the deries has benefited from a spanish tax rebate in the canary islands??? you're welcome i guess lmao #animation production carried out there and has ben collaboration with the Spanish gov... alright another win for perro sanxe #talking tag #watching arcane #watching arcane season 2 #watching this i dont think im ready for caitvi sex.... after reconciliation even like what will be of me.... now im scared #i am still scared bc idk what happened to jinx and vi and cait still... thats what worried me and boom!! ekko powder with the steel chair..

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unproduciblesmackdown · 3 months ago

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among the boundless billions zaniness like laugh track as it definitely has that moment of expressing "rolling my eyes as The Left makes a kerfuffle of Acting like they have a stance as a veneer over the true belief that [xyz] is cool & chill actually" like what, approximate 0.000% chance wendy isn't, as usual, given the Objective Stance of "yeah yeah ohh we are cancelling involved parties talking about how we Don't watch this But. we all love this damn epic movie & already have it memorized so shut the fuck up, kids today" like. don't wanna really delve into how much billions thinks taylor or anyone is "really" trans / nonbinary like not too much benefit of the doubt in this material including what does provide info abt that specifically

& the general like [head in hands. what do you think any of this could possibly be about (you're the one that made your show at all about Power)] of "yes, it's bad/wrong to be someone that someone has done something to / victim of something" like that to be anti misogyny All Women Must Be Epic Winners b/c there's something to be proved: that they don't Deserve to be victims (of misogyny), not taken as a Given. while when we see some epic winner men stepping on other men (who need not all be guaranteed Winners so as to say misogyny is wrong), that's often Good, well beyond any assumption that various forms of basic disrespect / violation / patterns of emergent/entrenched power difference as Bad (for being things done to people, not for there being people they're being done to), & generally billions has to take an extra step when ppl get shitted on & tell us the Specific Cases when it was undeserved actually & someone was being mean to a specific person who didn't deserve that. & the specific cases when hey guess it wasn't that bad(tm) or when hey It's Okay that you're someone something was done to, in this case. & tell us what we were supposed to know all along like when someone who something was being done to (wrong Of Them, whether b/c they inherently deserve it no matter what, &/or b/c they failed to be someone who could make it Impossible to do anything to them, which, how do you do that besides being The Authority / Superior yourself, exactly? nonrhetorically? what if the in group vs out group / fascism / authoritarianism protected Me?) was actually being treated Too Well b/c ah well the abuse meant you were getting any attention, maybe it meant you were claimed as any superior's property, maybe it meant you weren't Already disposed of, as all Losers were in the end, You're Welcome.

obviously referring to winston where it's spelled out all the abuse towards him was deserved, & More than he deserved in the case of rian having more access & taking advantage of that, all for billions' enjoying its own sendoff there of, again, maximizing violation & violence short of [real violence is physical & leaves bruises / draws blood / Literally kills] which would be distasteful in general But doesn't it make wags look like the winner & winston the loser is that the former's completely unrelated completely impersonal ego blow gets way amplified taken out on winston, the most vulnerable recurring character when spyros as [first & ultimate Everyone Hates Him role] is more entrenched in there & billions still magnanimously pities tuk, as it does winston too, just not quite as much. again that like completely surface level realized power fantasy of forcing the mirror up to the Inferior so they're like nooo my inferiorityyyy & in doing so like, the projection in that lmao, we get it re: the valuing of & need(tm) for such Power Tripping & Reaffirming My Superiority & My Ego Restored; Everyone Claps like good god. & then for all ben & tuk are the slightly softer Two Too Nice Boys duo to the rian & winston quant duo, also like too nice i guess but not as much, ben is in charge of tuk but Any instance of rian being in charge of winston outstrips them in that "yay interpersonal abuse" dynamic, like then in the end billions may be like "yeah it's possible to be mean to them unlike how being mean to winston is actually Nice b/c he deserves everything he gets, we only vicariously enjoy it vs Feeling Bad for tuk & ben sometimes (still magnanimously & it's Not That Bad / just goofin)" like ben & tuk still Fail by not being people it's impossible to do anything to. & not Exceptions who anyone is really being Too Mean to. like if they were women, in which case, no problem surely with a "positive" kind of victim blaming where there is something Inherent that Will be victimized so hey how about to cancel that out there's this special Paternal Protection you Need always, Or Else? :) but instead they are men who are asian & is ben gay & w/tuk & winston nobody mentions glasses or fatness but billions doesn't really do much or very in depth textual mentioning of Anything, even w/nonzero mention that there may be gender & race in this world. a gay man, once. no disability. we just Know who are the inferiors who deserve it when they're treated inferiorly, or if they don't, they start deserving it when they fail to stop/avoid it, but if you start mentioning the factors behind who we all totally agree is inferior like whoa nobody was Saying any of that? being the real agent of oppression on the basis of the factors only You spelled out, much? nonbinary? i never say anything about the Gender Binary when i'm subscribing to it, sounds like You've created & enforced it. obfuscation & deflection onto [so Just Normal nobody has to label, explain, or argue it] couldn't serve a purpose & protect the existing power differences as they are. maybe You're the problem? perhaps you brought it upon yourself & now you're causing too much trouble standing up for yourself while everyone else's criticism is laser focused on you as the prior & continuing negative actions done to you are taken as a given / unquestioned / covertly protected to overtly encouraged?

anyway so wild if the Completely Normal(tm) Victim Blaming is uncritically recreated & oft embraced for "if you're watching this & don't wish you were axe / find him appealing" [billions as a sequence of vicarious power trips] purposes in this series....but a bit wild considering like this is your multiseason show that wasn't just purporting to be those power trips for [enough demographic & apparently specific personal tastes overlap w/creators] & was at all purporting to question the matters of power at play in the material, or yknow, at least to not be completely superficial material while said material is textually & thematically all about power difference being leveraged, how, the consequences, & so on. thus i will have to intermittently talk about it forever like this like lord unbelievable. & the funny little & sometimes less funny less little characters it has trapped in there so that those of us who were never meant to be in the audience can be cursed with this knowledge. like i have some feedback. "imagine not victim blaming" & "imagine adjusting your perspective can go beyond superficial layers added to politely defer to some other ppl while they're present but really like cmon do they deserve that. am i not just saying what we're allll thinking"

#another random night another Verbal Effusion of [forehead to hand]#winston billions #who needs actual questions about power or the consequences of getting to consider others Lessers & acting accordingly #when we can last minute be like uh wendy is god actually. take it away wendy (wait she just does whole other shit half the season)#okay Now take it away wendy i guess b/c the series is dead set on you being the Moral Center #if mostly b/c gosh everyone either loves owning you as pseudo wife or correctly recognizes & defers to your superiority #the scene i couldn't bear to sit through at the start of s7 way too long sequence of wendy Going To Work to the ''cuz im awesome'' song #i was like. lol. i was like okay that is wendy's mood / perspective then. Wrong. it was billions conveying Fact to the audience. rip #abt as great setup for ''the only other shoe that finally dropped was that of Yeah It's This Completely Surface Level'' as possible (:#prince has exactly the same attitudes & actions as wendy does? uh well you see. it's just bad when he does it #if only more wendys were in charge. if only we go ''well even if it's bad if wendy does it? or axe or whoever? Could Be Worse''#nothing to analyze in the [but at least it's not worse] dead end re: justification of Power Leveraging & minimization of its consequences #tl;dr just the victim blaming embraced everywhere & the idea that everything that Deviates from the Norm Too Ethically Mindedly #is just that veneer slapped on overtop of [haha but truly: the norm] like no but seriously we all know It's Not That Deep(tm)#even for the characters written to exercise this [my Extra Mile Ethics] trait regularly it's expressed as this Polite Addendum #to the [what's Really at play] normal. the And Enbies tacked on; that's that on that & it Is an extra veneer to the norm #prince asking if taylor's changing up their pronouns; no more Meant a red flag than him immediately shitting on winston i'm sure #yet yknow why tf suppose taylor more than anyone else would Change Pronouns. taylor who the series also only ever shows as being #misgendered As A Woman. whose drag / cisguise As A Woman is not treated in the same way a man's would be / is #whose emotive / expressive affect isn't either. billions like [the genders are m/f] to [perhaps also amab/afab] Tacked On #as something politely Extra you do to their face that doesn't actually change (threaten) your idea of what's just Normal & True #like it's normal & true that ugh god don't you hate the autistic people around you? don't you wish you could go sicko mode on them #so that they couldn't be around you anymore & they'd have brought it upon themself & really it was good of you b/c The Group Cohesion #thanks you & b/c you just gave them free ABA? yes yep Surely Unquestionably #problem isn't abuse & concomitant violation in & of itself. it's Bad to be someone that's done to. we will announce Exceptions #rest of you either you brought it upon yourself or you failed to Correct that you're not someone who inherently deserves it #that is: someone who just can & will Stop It if done to them. well so you see winston pushing back is ignored or treated to further #backlash & then he withdraws (expression of his experience / creation of a consequence which tells the other Stop Doing This)#&/or otherwise conveys displeasure / being hurt (same as before. ''uh well push back / express xyz'' ppl did & were steamrolled/ignored)

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