#okay but i’m proud of them for being able to discuss change with each other while tying it back to their end goal this means lots to me | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

proudfreakmetarusonikku · 2 years ago

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THIS is a good/mature take on this! I’ve seen so many people say this to mean ““don’t do anything not family friendly ever and be a parent to each and every child on your blog”” and that turned me off the concept as a teenager, recognising that that was obviously ridiculous… and that lead me to some really weirdchamp Adults. Making a good point incredibly badly, or exaggerating a good point until it becomes weird and toxic, can hurt even more than making a bad point.

I used to be in the shipping discourse community, and the amount of adults (both “pro” and “anti”) who dedicated their days to mocking teenagers opinions and sending people after them was… immense. They exposed young people to inappropriate content- be it pornography or incredibly violent and triggering death threats- to get them to hate the other. It felt like the line changed every day, you had to have different opinions each and every day to fit in. And you wanted to! Because they were adults! You trusted them and thought they were cool and kind and you got so excited when they acknowledged you and you felt so mature and proud!

… yeah, no wonder grooming is EVERYWHERE in those communities. It’s sheer LUCK I wasn’t- i very nearly entered a RP with a groomer who targeted several members on the “pro” side, which was where I identified from 14ish to a little before I turned eighteen I believe. Those communities foster it by encouraging inappropriate relationships with adults and minors, and I don’t mean in the fiction they discuss, that’s irrelevant. My issue with the communities has very little to do with bad fanfiction opinions, it’s their toxicity and harmfulness. Minors on the other side were fair game to either harass or at the very least treat as Scary Evil Monsters, adults on your side were inherently the Safe Ones no matter whatever the fuck they said.

It fucked me up. I spent my teenage years convinced only a very select group of adults would ever care for me. I was fucking petrified to leave my circle, because I was convinced I would be harassed and harmed in every way for writing dark fic as a coping mechanism. I hurt and attacked people- I know why a lot of people have me blocked, and I don’t at all begrudge them for it. I was awful! I didn’t try to be, but I was aggressive because I was scared. Because that’s what those communities build. Fear. Fear of outsiders, fear of speaking up, fear of being doxxed. For me, with extreme moral anxiety, I was convinced if I ever stepped outside the ideas I was told were okay, I’d be an awful person who deserved to die. These communities are deeply predatory towards OCD people by their very nature.

And you know what? I wanted to leave so many fucking times. But I didn’t, until I’d found a safe community that I felt comfortable with outside of it and able to cut myself off from the toxic quagmire I’d found myself stuck in. And that was hard, because adults on the other side were also attacking me! My uninvolved friends were getting attacked just for being my friends! That left me even more petrified of leaving. It proved to me that the place I’d nearly got groomed in, where I often felt uncomfortable and alone, was the only place I’d ever be accepted.

And that’s like… bad? Can we not do that? I don’t want another kid to go through what I did, it sucked and left me with shit I’m not sure I’ll ever unlearn, because of adults that harassed me for liking dark fic and other adults who made me feel dependent on them and their community.

I just think it needs to be said that adults have to regulate themselves in online spaces in a way that is responsible for minors in fandom spaces. This will be long im sorry.

And im not specifically talking about adults with lists of DNI minors and block anyone at or under a certain age as well as make it clear their blog may not be safe for minors (ie spaces with a lot of nsfw content). Though curating an experience is a big part of being responsible of course. This post though is mostly delving into adults' behavior and how you need to be aware of your behavior.

For example, if you're an adult who purposefully curates a blog dedicated to fandom discourse, harming other people in the fandom, vagueing, and just having general toxicity about people ESPECIALLY when the targets of said harassment and toxicity are often the youngest in the fandom this is something you really need to reevaluate yourself about for a million reasons but including how this harms and serves as a poor example to younger people what a fandom space is meant to be. Like when I see minors involved in these types of toxicity, not to say they shouldn't be informed or held accountable or the ppl harmed should forgive them, but as an adult I mostly feel sad. I feel sad because I hope they're going to be okay when they're my age and look back on themselves. I hope they're safe esp when the adults around them act like this kind of behavior is normal and okay even though they've long graduated high school (even though ot wasn't okay then either for the record). Like does it not bother you that you're an adult who feels superior sending hate campaigns and ask box harassment and cyberbullying to minors on the internet because you're insecurities are that large and you've no ability to regulate them healthily? Does it not bother you that you teach young ppl in the fandom to do similarly by your actions, and affect their experience? Does the harm not bother you?

Because it should bother you. When you grow up especially in online fandom spaces you do need to be more aware of not only your words in general, but how many people may look up to you and use you as example and that you have a responsibility to be healthy online for the sake of yourself, others, and esp the youngest of the fandom.

Because it hurts to think ppl can grow up in fandom to think "oh sending kys and gore and dead animals over [insert discourse] plus potentially bigotry is normal because everyone around me does it and I want to fit in and I also fear speaking up against the adults who do this because you know the harassment".

And you might say "well cup im just gonna block all minors the end I get to harass people forever hahaha haha!" And well okay, but for another post (plus ones I've made before) there's still a million reasons this is fucked up you see but I'm just focusing on one aspect rn in this post.

And then there's the adults in fandom who all of a sudden hit my age and all they do is belittle kids and the way they act and there is all of a sudden a Certain Maturity that needs to be upheld for Everyone but Especially Adults.

So on the first point this includes adults who are like "I hate kids!!!! They are so [insert anything negative]" and it includes any comment to meta/writing/art/etc that is like not allowing a younger person in fandom to grow. Like the way I talked as 11 years on the internet was incomprehensible and frankly would've been subject to "omg kids are so cringe ew!" For sure these days, ig I was lucky my online friends were also 11 at the time. Looking at my old fandom Meta posts when I was 15, like I could imagine the way I see adults talking about takes like "oh shit I was worse!" Which is just a bag full of insecurity for me, but I also can't imagine being young in fandom and directly experiencing such critiques all the time. Like does it not bother you, once again? That you don't want to see kids in fandom grow into their creativity and co-exist safely in fandom as they do in public and experience overall and public joy? Why do you hate I mean hateee kids as an adult and why does their joy spark hate and misery in you (you might need therapy or to work that out srsly). And do the effects of your actions not bother you? What do you think you're doing other than silencing the creativity and joy in people and invoking ways to people please or for minors to Act Mature (in reality acting the way these adults want to avoid harassment ofc!) Instead of of course just experiencing joy and fun and community as they would normally.

And that brings me to my last pt of the effects of you hit [adult age] and must Act Mature and not Care About Cringe Fandoms or Watch Cartoons and do anything that would indicate you god forbid Don't Have a Real Job. This is the reality for growing up in fandom its finite once you're 19 no more Cringe of course /s! Because I've been subject to this take before as a criticism, and I've seen essays about how adults who watch Bluey are destroying the world forever, and I can take it because I go to therapy and I'm secure in my own maturity where it matters and joy where it matters. But imagine how younger people in the fandom feel. Like you're basically telling kids "btw once you're at Adult Age you must stop having fun forever and you must have a Real Job (or Education) and stop enjoying Immature things like fandom (even though I am in fandom btw im not a hypocrite saying this) or you're a freak immature adult who will never grow up". Like wow.

Like the conservative and near unnuanced take of to be Mature you need a real job (whatever that means) and to only watch adult shows in a normal manner (again whatever that means) aside, like you're really telling kids to grow up and be insecure. I'm serious! Like of course as you grow up it's important to mature no duh, but with real maturity means realizing there are times to be serious and there are times to enjoy things. Maturity doesn't mean I can never watch bluey god forbid else I have a not real job or become media illiterate as a consequence (esp when actually marketing wise a lot of kids shows are meant to also be entertaining for adults watching with their kids... and lo and behold your media literacy doesn't go away magically the moment the show starts). Like you really want younger ppl in fandom to be miserable and grow up miserable and create a cycle of miserable lest they become Cringe Adults that watch a harmless cartoon and enjoy it.

I'm never good at ending rants like this but conclusion. Get a grip on yourself and insecurities and be really careful how you foster fandom community for yourself but also to those that grow up in these spaces too.

As always add on/send asks/correct me/add nuance/etc. ❤️

#hyena don’t look #grooming mention tw

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tteokggukk · 3 years ago

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waiting game → jjk | ✏️ eighteen: back to square one

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It’s been over a year since you last visited his place.

The last time you were here, Jungkook was just minutes away from turning of age. Both of you were equally nervous at the time—him being tense about the hint for the soulmate mark that was supposed to appear, and you feeling frantic over finally confessing your feelings for him. By the end of the night though, neither ended well: Jungkook found no mark and you were later on rejected by him, and since that incident you swore you’d never come back to this place, that you wanted nothing to do with him, and that you’d stop all contact and cut him out of your life.

And yet here you were, back at Jungkook’s apartment.

It’s funny, you thought for sure being back here would bring back that miserable and embarrassing night, but instead you were hit with a wave of nostalgia and a certain warmth in your chest that you haven’t felt in a while. Before anything else, this place has always been your safe space, and the stronger memories of you being happy here definitely outweighed that one horrible night.

Looking around, you found yourself amused with how little has changed— the collection of speakers he had were still kept on the same shelves, his collection of blank canvases that were stacked up on one side of the room, and the old frames of your pictures together were still hung up on his wall. A smile crept up on your lips as you walked slowly, staring at each frame carefully and recalling each event preserved in those shots.

Somehow, although he was only footsteps away in his kitchen cooking up ramen for you two to share, you missed him.

Even though you and Jungkook were slowly patching things up and going back to the way things used to be, it still doesn’t change the fact that a long time has passed since you two had been left alone together in close quarters. Sure, you two were talking a lot more now and you both have gone out together, but conversations held through texts and hangouts held in public were far more different than spending time indoors with just the two of you.

Minutes later, Jungkook came back holding a tray with two bowls and a potful of ramen. As he sets the tray down in front of you for you two to share, you felt your phone buzzing endlessly in your pocket. Not even seconds later, Jungkook’s own phone starts buzzing continuously.

For the vast majority of the time, you both spent the hours talking about your plans for the showcase with only minor attempts at small talk and jokes. As expected, your conversations were filled with nervous laughter and a few awkward silences, but at least you two had more progress with your plans. You tried practicing a few songs together, but eventually you both agreed that none of the songs you had done so far made enough impact. When you ran out of ideas, Jungkook proceeded to make more lists of song suggestions for your performance, and when he ran out of ideas, you went ahead and made your own lists.

Two hours later, you had about twenty lists—all of which were made to avoid more small talk.

Jungkook stared at the lists scattered all over his coffee table without blinking. You were sprawled out on his couch while he was slumping on the floor, his back against the couch. You were both clearly burnt out with twenty lists but still zero choices. He lets out a sigh and shakes his head, catching your attention.

“Are you hungry?” Jungkook shifts his gaze from the papers to you, his bright, doe-eyes meeting your tired ones.

“Kind of,” You sat up straight and hugged your knees, “Are you?”

“Yeah.” Jungkook stands up from the floor, dusting off the back of his pants as he got up, a joking smile on his face, “Do you wanna eat some ramen?”

You couldn’t help but let out a small laugh. You just had ramen with him two hours ago, and he had six cups of ramen while he stayed up with you last night. How much ramen could this boy actually eat? “I’m sorry, Hoseok told me to say no when a guy asks me that,” You joked, faking a sad expression on your face.

Jungkook raises a brow and flops himself on the couch to sit across from you, crossing his arms, “You didn’t say no to me last night.”

“Well now I am.”

“That’s not fair,” Jungkook’s let’s out a laugh, causing his body to lean forward as before turning himself to face you, “Ramen’s all I have.”

“Why am I not surprised?” You shook your head, your eyes crinkling as you laughed. You couldn’t see it, but the sight of your laughter brought out Jungkook’s adoring stare. Feeling proud of himself, it felt like a big achievement getting you to laugh like that for the first time tonight, as if he had just broken an invisible barrier between you two. He missed all of it—he missed the sound of your laugh, being able to get close to you, hanging out with you like this. Just like the old times.

Jungkook smiles and looks away, afraid you’d catch him staring at you before getting off the couch, “I’m kidding. Of course I’ve got other food.”

“You do?” You asked tauntingly.

“Of course I do, I’m friends with Jin. Come on, let’s go have dinner.”

Without a moment’s thought, Jungkook holds his hand out to take yours. The moment your hands meet, a heavy beat begins drumming in your ears, taking you a second to realize that it was the sound of your own heart that you could hear as it did several leaps in your chest. While Jungkook led you to his kitchen where you two decided to cook something up together, you tried your best not to seem at all fazed as you kept a neutral face. When he eventually had to let go of your hand, a part of you wanted to hold onto that warmth, but you tried to push the thought away.

Although you initially came over to talk about what your plans were for the showcase, it now seems as if you two had no further plans to discuss anything. It was already eleven at night, but neither of you appeared to be aware of it as you were cuddled up underneath the sheets while watching old reruns of a TV show you and Jungkook both loved. You had no idea how you ended up lying this close next to him—there must’ve been something in the food he had cooked up that somehow made you two lose any form of awkwardness between each other. Jungkook had to thank Jin later for the recipe.

“Look, it’s the part where they’re trying to pivot the couch,” Jungkook laughs as he points to the screen, his hand squeezing on your shoulder to get your attention while your head rested on his arm.

You didn’t bother to look. It was a scene you’d already watched countless times to cheer you up months ago. Instead, you looked up to see Jungkook, his face illuminated by the light coming from the television and a table lamp. You could feel his chest vibrating while he laughed, your temple resting on him made it easy for his deep chuckle to send vibrations through you. From where you were, his lashes looked much longer. His eyes were all crinkled from laughing and his mouth was curled up, showcasing the mole underneath his lips. The proximity between you two was so close, the scent of his freshly laundered clothes was enough to embrace you.

He’s so pretty.

He was all you wanted to stare at, but your eyes were beginning to betray you as you felt your own lids getting heavier and heavier. Staying up last night was a terrible idea after all, and though you wanted to stay up longer to be here with him, your body couldn’t help but melt into the soft mattress. Jungkook’s arm around you wasn’t helping you to fight the urge to stay up, either.

It took a while for Jungkook to hear it, but later on he began to notice the sound of soft snores next to him, only for him to find you all dozed off on his arm. Nervously, he debated whether or not he should get his arm off and wake you up to bring you home. But, as he mentally went back and forth trying to decide on what he should do, he instead found himself studying your features and smiling to himself at the sight of how peaceful you looked.

It would be a crime to disrupt your sleep, he thought.

Tucking strands of your hair behind your ear, he let himself have a few moments to cherish the little details on your face before turning the television off and slowly covering you two with a blanket.

You were having such a good night’s rest, until you tried shifting your position as you slept—on your waist was a slight weight that held you close and left you unable to move.

As your eyes adjusted to the dim light of the room, all you could see was Jungkook sleeping soundly in front of you. Trying to ignore the dangerously erratic beating in your chest, you attempted to level your breathing so as to not wake him up. All the tiredness you had felt earlier were all gone now, you were fully aware of Jungkook’s face just being several inches from yours while his arms kept you close in front of him.

You couldn’t lie, there was a small urge to caress his cheek until you heard the sound of your phone buzzing from behind you. Carefully, you reached out for your phone which thankfully was only inches away from your head.

Was it actually 3am?

“Who is it?”

The sound of Jungkook’s sleep-filled voice causes you to freeze, making you drop your phone on your face.

“Oh shoot, sorry,” He apologizes, bringing his palm to your cheek in an attempt to soothe the minor pain caused by the drop of your phone screen, “Didn’t mean to surprise you.”

“I’m okay, did I wake you?” You asked softly, noticing how his eyes were still squinted as he tried to open them fully.

“No, don’t worry,” Jungkook grins sleepily, “What time is it?”

“It’s 3am,” You told him.

“Oh.”

Reality began sinking in as you realized you were still here and it was this late. You knew he was too nice to wake you up, which is probably why you were still at his place. You began to mentally prepare yourself saying goodbye to him at this hour. Expecting Jungkook to get up, he moves the arm resting on top of you, setting you free from his being held into his arms. You tried to shift to the other side of the bed to get off, but Jungkook reaches for the lamp instead of getting up.

“Want me to turn this lamp off?” He asks, “I didn’t turn it off earlier in case you woke up and needed it.”

“What?” Your eyes narrow as you look back at him over your shoulder.

“What are you doing? Come back,” He almost pouts. His voice was too raspy for your own good, you knew you would do about anything he asked you to right now. He could even ask you to clean his bathroom at this hour and you’d probably do it.

Jungkook, probably half-awake, places his hand on your waist. This prompts you to move closer to him and back to your old position where you were facing him. He hums to himself when he’s got his arms wrapped around you again, but you tried to knock some sense into him.

“Jungkook, it’s late,” You whispered.

“I know,” he hums, his eyes almost shut.

“I should leave.”

Now his eyes were wide open. He lets out a small sigh as he finally meets your gaze, “Do you actually think I’m going to let you leave at this hour?”

“I don’t wanna inconvenience you or anything—“

“You never do. what would inconvenience me is you losing sleep when you could be resting right now,” He tells you softly as he closes his eyes. You don’t say anything, only staring at him as you were at a loss for words. When he doesn’t hear anything from you or feel your body relax so you could go back to rest, he extends his arms towards you to bring you closer to him.

“Just go to sleep. I’ll drive you home first thing in the morning if you really wanna go home,” he says, finally shutting his eyes. It takes you a second before you finally give in and bring your arms around him. Smiling to yourself, you snuggle your face into his chest and silently pray he doesn’t feel the heat building up on your cheeks. Once he was sure you’ve relaxed, Jungkook turns off the lamp and brings his hand to gently stroke your hair, only going back to sleep once he hears your soft and peaceful snores again.

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– fic type: social media au, soulmates au

– pairing: jungkook x reader

– genre: ex-friends to lovers, humor, crack, fluff, angst, slow burn

– warnings: explicit language

SYNOPSIS: in a world where everyone finds a unique connection to their soulmate once they turn of age, y/n can’t seem to figure out her clue. after desperately staying up all night to find one, y/n decides to rest and write down her list of groceries on her arm, ultimately giving up on finding a clue along with the whole idea of soulmates. that is, until jungkook wakes up to a whole list of poorly written ingredients scribbled all over his own arm.

taglist: @boraength @rageyoudamnednerd @gaeguuliii @justbangtanthingz @maknaechu @lochness-butmakeitsexy @thealmightyzah @cholychi @curedblues @zxlummxxd @buzzyybee @miriamxsworld @bringitseijoh @j00nifi3d @cuteipat @lilacdreams-00 @missmadwoman @ggukkieland @c0ld-as-russia @notvantaes @yoontaethings @madaboutjeon @littletinyhobi @duchesskaren @vantxx95 @rosesandluna @rainy-cobbled-streets @taegijns @jaiuneamesolitaiire @dopedreamfireparty @music-makes-me-shine @imluckybitches @betysotelo18 @viscoolreal @cha-raena @starlitemotions @jaerisdiction @michellejonesbitch @ellesalazar @babyrosieareroses @staaardustt @secretlycrazyhummingbird @rikilvr @calumsfringe @moon1uvrs @pvt-only @todoroki-slut @definitelynotcesia @magicsweetener @moonibub @lovelytaes-blog @thequeen-kat @youreverydayzebra @wrmnssoul @tanumiki @itsalyssa15 @halesandy @rdiamondbts2727 @luvrsofbts @shreyuuu @windex-princess-ami @excelseor @stfu-xeena @writieryn @girlwiththeglittereyeliner @tazzi-baby @657mg @liquidnovocaine @lyra0cassiopeia @di0rgguk @thelilbutifulthings @renhold-nightspear @detective-daikon @taeshuworld @hobizi

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lazyliars · 4 years ago

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/rp

Before I get into it, I want to state that is EXPLICITLY an analysis of the Characters, and is not intended to touch on how the cc’s played them in a meta sense unless specifically stated otherwise.

Also, this is technically a part two to my other post, which took a more in depth look at Techno and Phil’s reactions to Tommy’s death. It’s not necessary when reading this post, but I don’t address their reactions here.

So. The question must be asked.

Are we [the Syndicate] the baddies?

Yes.

The End.

Why are the Syndicate the baddies?

They got damn logo is a wither skull.

The End.

That's not how this works.

Yeah, yeah. You’re right.

The Syndicate's goals as an organization are not inherently bad. They seem to have good intentions behind them, and the focus on the freedom of it's individual group members is important to remember when talking about it; It is not a government. There is no hierarchical power system. No one is forced to do anything against their will, or surrender any of their rights or power to remain a member. It is not a government.

I also want to address Techno and Phil backing Ranboo into a corner – I see them getting a lot of flack for this, but I personally do not think it is relevant to the greater discussion, or necessarily representative of any contradictions within the organization. It was clearly played for laughs, and after they back off they clarify to Ranboo that they won't force him. Then later when Phil and Ranboo are alone, Ranboo feels safe enough to express that he felt like he was pressured into it, and Phil assures him he is allowed to leave whenever he wants; He is not being forced to do anything, and he is not being coerced or blackmailed.

None of the Syndicate members have done any wrongs against each other in the context of the Syndicate, OR gone against any of the Syndicate's core principles.

That, said, holy shit are they the baddies.

Listen, there's trying to telegraph a meaning or message to the audience and then there's having your logo be wither skulls on blackstone. That is straight out of the skit I keep referencing, seriously.

Okay, but, they laughed at it! It was played as a joke, just like the Ranboo thing!

The Ranboo thing was improv, the Syndicate's headquarters were planned – the artistic choices that they made reflect on what role they want the build and the organization inhabiting it to play in the future storylines.

Wither Skulls kind of have some CONNOTATIONS. Techno is an English major, I don't think he chose the most threatening imagery possible on accident, and then joked about the way people would interpret it just to stir the pot. This reads as hugely intentional.

And beyond that, the jokes they make during this part aren't “haha yeah, we look bad but we're actually good!” they're “you can tell by looking at these that we're the good guys wink wink, this is good guy stuff right here :)” It is a joke about how they are definitely not the good guys. This isn't even a case of unreliable narrators, this is one step down from flat out saying the meta intent.

But okay, I hear you, I'm talking about things that haven't happened yet. The Syndicate hasn't used any Withers, they could be an aesthetic choice. Lets look at what they do in practice.

So, they barge into private property, assess Snowchester's right to continue existing based entirely on their own ideals of what Freedom is, and then only once Tubbo assures them that they have no standing leader do they grant the place their approval to, and I gotta stress this part, continue existing.

In my Quackity meta, I already talked about how Government in the context of a M1necraft RP cannot be compared to IRL Governments on a one-to-one scale. They don't serve the same purposes or have the same type of power. What I didn't talk about was Agency in the context of m1necraft governments.

In an irl government, if you are born into one, you can't really leave without committing a massive overhaul on your life, which can be expensive and difficult, if not impossible for many people. Even in a “benevolent” government, the simple physicality of where you were born can prevent you from leaving it easily.

The same hurdles do not exist in the Dream SMP. People who join M1necraft governments choose to. They want to, either at the beginning when they form one, or later on when they join up. So far, no Government has just Sprung Up and forced the current residents of an area to become dependent on them, except maybe the Eggpire, who's status as a government is... shakey.

And even when people want to leave or separate from the government, they have been historically able to do so without any trouble or any effort from said governments to stop them. Jack Manifold emancipated from Manberg. Fundy and Quackity both left to start new nations. In all cases they were allowed to do so without any attempts on the part of the governments to stop them, either through force, or institutions preventing them from doing so.

The most anyone has lost when leaving a government is their house, which is still usually their property anyway, and is something that is easily rebuilt elsewhere and is inconvenient to move anyway.

The only exceptions to this might be Schlatt exiling Wilbur and Tommy - but even then, they weren’t trying to leave, they were trying to get back in, and of course the original L’manberg revolution, where Dream attempted to force L’manberg back into the Dream SMP, which wasn’t even a government at that point in time.

I don’t consider Phil’s house arrest an example of a government forcing someone to stay a citizen - that was treated less as a matter of a citizen wanting to leave the country and more as a threat to national security. Still pretty fucked up, but it’s a different issue.

What I'm saying is, If Tubbo wants to create a government out in the middle of nowhere, threatening no one, forcing no one to join either through force or desperation, and allowing people to join willingly because they want to, then he should be allowed to do that.

The Irony of the Syndicate, a group of people consisting of some of the richest, strongest people on the server, going around and enforcing 'Freedom' that entails no one person having more power than any other, is absurd.

It shows an extreme lack of self-awareness and/or self-righteousness, as they seem to think that they deserve to be the ones who decide what constitutes a government.

Snowchester is a small independent nation - they shouldn’t have to live in fear of being obliterated if they don’t walk on eggshells to meet an arbitrary standard decided by people who’s only authority on the matter COMES FROM THEIR PERSONAL POWER. No one elected them! No one chose them! They were not “approved” by the server at large to enact this kind of law.

The Syndicate are not a government, but they are an unsupervised power structure exerting their ideals on a land that did not ask for them. Like, These people have invented an actual Authoritarian-Anarchist faction. How the hell did they manage this?????

Back on topic.

Tubbo shows them the crater left by his nukes. The reaction is oddly positive – the nukes are fine by the morals of the Syndicate, apparently. I'd argue that they come across as more impressed than anything else; they seem to respect Tubbo for having gotten ahold of “real” power.

(There's a few good memes out there about “We can excuse nuclear weaponry, but we draw the line at Government!”)

So. By the Syndicate's standards: A single person or group of acceptably equal persons with weapons of mass-destruction are only worth “keeping an eye on” because they might provoke other people.

Like, I consider Project Dreamcatcher to be one of, if not the most morally ambiguous thing Tubbo has ever done, largely because it was all on his own initiative. He holds some culpability for The Butcher Army and Phil's house arrest, but they weren't his ideas and he was mostly following Quackity at that point.

And Phil tells Tubbo, IMMEDIATELY AFTER SEEING THE NUCLEAR CRATER:

“Looks like you've reformed a little bit Tubbo, I'm proud.”

And it's fine. Crimes against nature? Fine. A sign of healing in fact!! Tubbo is having a sweeeelll time and he definitely didn't make these nukes specifically in fear of being attacked by these exact people! Tubbo is doing great. Tubbo is doing fine. Tubbo. is. FINE.

Anyway.

I don't think this presentation of the Syndicate was an accident. Looking at the greater lore of SMP right now, after the Egg is done, their list of enemies is slim, and considering that they seem solely invested in taking down governments, that leaves maybe Snowchester, Kinoko Kingdom, and Eret and the greater Dream SMP.

Snowchester has not been shown to be corrupt, evil, or have any intent to go down that route. The most ambiguous thing they've done is, again, is the nukes. Other than that, it's pretty much your average cottagecore snow village.

Kinoko is presented in an even more morally 'good' light, Karl having founded it specifically for his Time-travel library purposes, which are currently being treated by the narrative as a selfless act, if not downright heroic.

Eret is also a fairly 'good' aligned character atm. He's been on that redemption grind since the og betrayal, and doesn't seem keen on backtracking. He's actively tried to leverage his position as king to make things better, and hasn't been quiet about that. He was also 'validated' by Tommy*, a character who has been described both by his allies and enemies as “the hero,” so take that as you will.

What I'm getting at is, all of the current potential enemies for the Syndicate aside from the Egg, are currently being cast as 'good,' and if they were to be attacked, they would undoubtedly have the moral high-ground, unless something drastically changed.

The only potential shakeups I can think of is are a Dream escape and/or a Wilbur revival, both of which could draw the Syndicate's attention and ire, depending on how things go. That said, it's just as likely that either or both of them would join the Syndicate – Dream still has that favor, and Phil and Techno both seemed to think Wilbur would've agreed with their blowing up L'manberg.

Both of those characters are currently **villains – the fact that they're both prime candidates for the Syndicate is a huge indication of the direction it's going to go as the plot moves forward.

((*I know some people are gonna come at me for painting Tommy as the “deciding factor” of what is morally good, so lemme just stop you there. I'm not talking about Tommy somehow having the 'right' to decide who is and isn't good, and definitely not the right to decide who should and shouldn't be king. I'm saying that Tommy, a character who the narrative treats as, if not a good person, then a person who is trying to be good, was in support of Eret, a character who has also been trying to be good.

Eret doesn't gain the moral highground because Tommy said so, he gets it because a character who the narrative treats as trying to do better, acknowledged Eret's earnest attempts at doing the same.

**I'm referring to Wilbur here as a villain because Tommy seemed convinced he would be if he were to be brought back. There is always the possibility that he's wrong.))

So, to summarize this: I read the Syndicate as being intentionally positioned as future antagonists, if not outright villains of a future arc. They are NOT a Government but their goals are contradictory with their means, and it is important to keep in mind that they plan to enforce their own brand of freedom on people who did not grant them either the authority or permission to do so.

So, uh. Can you tell I loved these streams? They were seriously so good. I kept switching between Ranboo and Techno's POV's trying to keep up with everything. I still have to watch Niki's!

All in all, I'm super, super excited for whats coming next, egg stuff, Syndicate stuff, Tommy stuff, all of it.

#dream smp #tubbo #the syndicate #c!techno critical #c!phil critical #dream smp analysis #lazytext

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chainofclovers · 3 years ago

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Ted Lasso 2x10 thoughts

GOOD GOD.

“No Weddings and a Funeral” is like being hungover but also coming out of a hangover. Having a terrible cold but also feeling better and appreciating every breath that comes through your nose. Embarking on an organizational project and accidentally falling into a photo album and crying about the pictures and organizing almost nothing tangible but making a few things more clear in your brain.

So much of this episode is about the AWFUL POINTLESSNESS OF DECORUM. How loud is too loud when you’re drinking stolen wine and shrieking about sex in a church right before your father’s funeral? How should you feel--thirty years later, as an accommodating, anger-averse person--about having been too angry to attend the funeral for your father who killed himself? What expression should you make when you show up really late to a different funeral? Why must you wear uncomfortable shoes just because someone died? What happens in your mind between standing up to give a eulogy for a man you’re still angry with and choosing to Rick Roll your mom and everyone else as an act of complicated love, humiliatingly incomplete until someone else starts to sing? Should you worry about your therapist seeing your normally tidy flat in a full-on state of depression mess? Is it okay to be offended that your boyfriend is so uncomfortable about death that he can’t stop making morbid jokes? Should you care about other people caring that you’re crunching an apple in church or squealing with joy to be reunited with a friend you’ve not seen in awhile? Are you obligated to explain your behavior if your kid doesn’t understand how you could stay with someone unfaithful? How far behind the counter should you sink when your [undefined relationship person]’s mother has just let you know she can see your dick through your underwear? Is a funeral reception an okay place to find a hookup? Is a funeral reception a decent spot for a break-up? Is a funeral reception a good time for a love confession when you know the person you’re confessing to is happy with someone else? And who do you make eye contact with when you can’t look directly at the person asking you if you’re okay when there’s so, so much about you she doesn’t know yet? Even if--for this tiny little moment within a vast swath of many okay and not-okay moments--you’re honest when you tell her that you are?

I fucking adored this episode because it answers all these questions very simply: Show up. Show up for yourself. Show up for your friends. Try not to harm yourself. Try not to harm your friends.

I love that this episode is about the messiness of adulthood and the things we bring with us from childhood and that it takes place partially in Rebecca’s childhood bedroom, and in Ted’s childhood memories. Dwelling in those places (whether physically or mentally) isn’t an automatic recipe for regression, but it does get everyone closer to the things that made them who they are, to the unresolved and half-buried parts of them that still make them tick today.

Forever obsessed with every single detail about Rebecca’s childhood bedroom.

Forever obsessed with Deborah’s decision to Rick Roll herself every single morning of her life.

Forever obsessed with Rebecca’s decision to Rick Roll her father’s funeral as a way to not have to make up a single word about her father and to do something very vulnerable and kind for herself and her mother and everyone.

Forever obsessed with Ted’s decision to Rick Roll Rebecca Rick Rolling her father’s funeral.

Forever obsessed with an entire found family backing it up.

I love that it is Isaac’s leadership that ensures every single member of the team attends the service for Paul.

I am very, very interested in Jamie’s love confession to Keeley because I do think it will spark some reflection in Keeley but I do not think it’ll go the cliched love triangle route.

Each scene with Rebecca and Sam struck (for me, a human being sharing a subjective perspective on the internet) the tender-awkward-beautiful-stressful chord I was hoping it would. I think it’s wonderful that Sam is honest with Rebecca about how difficult it is to keep their relationship a secret, and I love that Rebecca has a million mostly-unarticulated reasons for why she’d much prefer the secret to continue. I like that Sassy, Keeley, and Nora respond to the revelation as friends; they might be tempering their judgments in part because they’ve all gathered to bury Rebecca’s dad, but I don’t think their reactions would’ve been that different even on a happier occasion.

While there are a million and one different reasons why a continued relationship between Rebecca and Sam could cause serious ethical problems, I really love that when people share big news on this show, the people who care about them generally react by trying to see why the person is doing what they’re doing. Doesn’t mean they shouldn’t also hold each other accountable, but in my book it’s OK that Keeley’s first reaction was to feel happy that her friend is having some fun.

Also everyone has been making weird judgment calls this season, and this episode felt like a moment of real breakthroughs in terms of people telling the truth about things that happened to them and leaving themselves open to honest responses from others.

September 13, 1991. It’s so tenderly, beautifully, overwhelmingly meaningful that there’s still so much Ted and Rebecca don’t know about the things they have in common in these parallel lives they’re leading. The scene between Sarah Niles and Jason Sudeikis is so beautifully acted, and so is the scene between Hannah Waddingham and Harriet Walter. The way they intertwine to communicate that Ted and Rebecca basically lost the ability to trust their fathers simultaneously, from an ocean away? In the hands of lesser storytellers, it would feel too perfect a mirroring, but here it feels heartbreakingly imperfect. All the things they still don’t know. All the questions they try to ask each other. All the things they don’t dare ask yet. And then the storytellers are holding a candle up to all of it and letting the audience bask in the glow of this connection even if Ted and Rebecca can’t fully understand it yet.

I am so proud that Rebecca and Deborah were able to embark on the beginnings of a conversation about the ways Deborah and Paul’s relationship might have resembled or not resembled Rebecca and Rupert’s. It feels possible that they could get to a point where Rebecca truly internalizes her mother’s pride that she broke a cycle by leaving Rupert, and could maybe even understand why her mother made the choices she made. I love that in the final scene, they’re still relying on their old mother-daughter conversational patterns—the frustrations, the snippy shorthand, the passive-aggression. Mothers and daughters!

I am also proud that Ted—albeit via a joke about Sharon charging him for the house call—indicates that he understands the value of Sharon’s work. He’s changed a lot, all in realistic ways for someone who loves learning and really does want to meet people where they are and appreciate them. I’m very moved that instead of putting himself in a real harmful situation by showing up to the funeral on time at any cost, he did what he needed to do to take care of himself and accept care from someone else. And then Sharon’s suggestion that he think about things he loved about his father? And the way he’s able to share a positive memory of Rebecca’s own father at a time when she really needed it? Gosh.

Awkward, undecorous transition from 1991 to present-day incoming...but SASSY! She’s just, like, a whirling dervish of loyal friendship and not giving a fuck and penis size discussions and being casually, delightfully cruel to Rupert, who so deserves it. Rebecca was going on a real face journey when Sassy goes off with Ted at the end, and I’m sort of *eyes emoji* about all of that, but I continue to feel like Sassy is the most imperfectly wonderful friend-from-the-past kind of person and I love everything she and Nora get to do in this episode.

Keeley saying “That baby is whack” might be my favorite line in the episode? Maybe the whole show? Not really but really.

FUCK YOU, RUPERT. Bex and Diane, y’all are fine. And I truly feel for Nate...whatever scheme he’s getting suckered into. Whatever insecurity Rupert is preying on. I want Nate to go to therapy, too.

I feel like it was an unpopular opinion at the time, but I loved Rebecca’s 2x1 revelation about vulnerability and fear of getting hurt and needing to let someone love her. Sassy doesn’t always word things in the most nuanced way, but I think there’s a real possibility that she did ask Rebecca to really consider what it means to feel either safe or unsafe with a person but to know that in either circumstance, that person could end up causing her pain. Standing in that closet with Sam, managing to make it clear that she’s not asking for a break because she knows he will hurt her but because she has to figure out how to be with a wonderful person who could cause her pain...the growth, man. Makes me emotional.

I emerged from this episode feeling, of course, stunned by all the amazing parallels and revelations and beautiful acting and Rick Rolls and just, everything. I also emerged feeling sad/raw/tender because messiness and decorum and growth and coping mechanisms and death and dramatic irony and not knowing things about people and not knowing what you don’t know...it’s a sad, raw, tender place to be.

To quote a guy who got a whole sitcom (lol) named after him, life is real hard.

#ted lasso #ted lasso s2 spoilers #meta by me #ted lasso 2x10 #a lesbian watches ted lasso #lotta feelings in here y'all #cw suicide

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acanthodii-phobia · 3 years ago

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hey sorry if this is so sudden but i’ve been feeling so down lately and can i just get the turtles comfort reader (they/them pls) bc they think they can’t do anything right? rottmnt as well pls

Of course! :) And I'm sorry you haven't been in the best place recently.. I hope the turtles and I can help ease your thoughts a little. Things will get better, and many things in your life will change over time - the bad is only temporary that way, even if it doesn't feel like it. Right now you're at your strongest, and I now you can and will get through it!

We believe in you. 🐢🐢🐢🐢

(RoTTMNT) Comfort Oneshots X GenderNeutral!Reader PT. 1

Each turtle bro. will focus on something a little different, but overall still what you requested. I hope that's alright. ^^ These are slightly longer than my other posts, so these oneshots will be split amongst two posts. Leo and Raph are in pt. 1, Donnie and Mikey are in pt. 2!

•

Content Warning: The topics discussed won't go into graphic detail, but if you feel like you would get upset by reading about topics dealing with depression or negative thoughts, please do not read for your own care.

•

One-shots will contain:

Y/N - Your Name

Leo:

[Comfort for feeling inadequate, worthless, uneeded & request.]

- They were crying in Leo's bedroom.

- The perfect place, they thought, for some time away from everyone. Y/N knew they were supposed to just be enjoying themselves and having fun; but they couldn't stop that irritating feeling.

- Those reoccurring thoughts of not being needed. Or wanted. The possibility of screwing everything up, and losing everyone they cared about... and it would've just been a waste of their time. Y/N just wasting everyone's time.

- The last thing they wanted was to bring down everyone's night only because of the terrible mood they were in.

- So here they were. Tucked away in the corner of Leo's bed, hugging a pillow and crying. In the dark. While the others were out there completely clueless.

- At least, that's what Y/N thought.

- Leo comes in a few minutes later searching for Y/N, while making unintentionally insensitive and boastful comments about him being better (nothing directed specifically at Y/N, though).

- Hearing Leo's comments makes Y/N cry more, and the moment he sees them he immediately rushes to their side, trying to comfort them and apologising profusely.

- He had a full grin before, expecting Y/N to reply back with another joke, but seeing them like this hurt him in a way he hadn't really felt before.

- "Hey, hey," he reaches out and holds Y/N face. He doesn't force them to look at him though - he just wants them to know he's there. "I'm so sorry, please don't cry. You know... you're just as good of a player as I am - I didn't realise you were taking Mario Monopoly so seriously."

- They shake their head, breathing deeply as they try to calm down.

- "I'm not upset over Monopoly, Leon, but thank you."

- He's confused. "Then... then why are you crying?"

- "I've just been having a lot of... uh, negative thoughts recently."

- Y/N explains how they feel inferior to him and his brothers, but specifically to Leo. They see Leo as this 'flawless, charming, and a jack-of-all-trades' kind of guy. Even though he can be occasionally rude without realising it, he's still so loved by his family and friends.

- "You're just," their breath is shaky as they push their hair back. "...so perfect. You do everything right, and even the times when you do mess up... no one hates you. I feel like I can't do anything right - I'm awkward and can't tell my left from right occasionally. You're important and valued by those who care about you, you're talented and..."

- "...I feel like I can't compete. I'm nothing like that, and I'm so envious of you." Y/N confesses, wiping their face with their sleeve.

- Leo is stunned - he didn't know they felt like this at all. His eyes never leave Y/N - his hands slowly drifting from their face - contemplating on his next move.

- He's not really 'good' at this sort of thing, but because it's Y/N, he wants to do more than just listen. Leo cautiously takes hold of the pillow that Y/N was gripping onto, and places it beside him.

- Leo then pulls Y/N closer to him, hugging them tightly.

- "You're valued by me," he whispers to them. "What you can or can't do... doesn't define your worth. Nothing can really define that. You existing and doing your best is worth enough." Leo leans back and smiles reassuringly. "...And I mess up a lot, too. I'm imperfect just like you, and that is always okay. And you know I'm never wrong~"

- He chuckles as he presses his forehead against Y/N's, reaching up slightly so his snout touches their nose and rubs them together affectionately. Y/N smiles.

- "Thanks... Leon."

Raph:

[Comfort for feeling insecure about vulnerability, thinking they should be stronger/ move on & request.]

- Y/N was watching Raph train in the dojo, admiring his strength and skills from the sideline, perched ontop of some extra mats. They had to admit, that despite his size he was very nimble and fairly noiseless on his feet. His brute force was more than expected, though.

- The guy's built like a tank - It's a very dangerous combo.

- But compared to him, Y/N was pretty clusmy and much weaker than him.

- They do their best to ignore the thoughts that come to their mind, but it was of no use. They weren't strong enough to protect themselves, nevertheless them... what were they supposed to do if they needed Y/N's help? They felt inferior to him.

- But Y/N keeps smiling as Raph shows off.

- However, he caught on quickly - he's able to tell that Y/N's smile isn't 100% genuine. He stops what he's doing immediately and faces them.

- "Hey, Shorty. You got somethin' on your mind?"

- Y/N is caught off guard. "Oh, uh... no. It's nothing."

- Raph looks at them doubtfully. "Are you sure?"

- They nod, denying it in fear of being vulnerable and being shunned away for saying otherwise. Raph gives them one last look before going back to his training.

- Eventually, Y/N quietly retreats from the dojo and runs just a bit outside of the lair to clear their mind. Everything is good for a moment, but they soon start hyperventilating and panicking.

- "What am I doing? Gosh, you look so stupid right now, why can't you control yourself? Calm down... breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe you idiot." They grip onto their shirt, breathing deeply, but it only works them up more.

- It wasn't long until it became difficult to breathe - their chest was tight and their lungs felt shriveled up and blocked off, like they just couldn't get any air in no matter how hard they tried. Tears start falling down their face.

- Raph tracks them down quickly, thanks to his brothers. Deep down, he knew Y/N needed someone right now. Anyone.

- But he really wants it to be him.

- "No, no, you guys just stay here! Everything's fine, I just need to find them. We'll back in a minute!"

- The moment he sees Y/N, his heart stops. There's a deep, weirdly empty feeling of dread that washes over him. He runs to their side without another thought, and does his best to guide them through it. He holds their hands in his, and rubs the back of them with his thumbs, whispering to them.

- "Y/N... it's okay. It's okay." He lets go of one their hands and holds the side of their face. "You're doing great... can you try some breathing exercises with me? Everything will be okay, I promise."

- They're still gripping onto their chest, crying, heaving deeply and erratically as Raph asks this, but the only thing Y/N does is nod.

- "Good," he assures them, smiling. "Now... do your best to follow me, okay? First, pinch your nose and close your mouth, bite your lip if you have to. You're going to hold your breath for a few seconds to start."

- "Perfect - you're doing great, Y/N! Now, breathe in deep through your mouth," Raph does it with them, nodding. "Good, and release through your nose."

- Once Y/N was back to a regular breathing, Raph asks them to explain what was going on, and he wasn't going to take "nothing" as an answer this time.

- Y/N stares up at him, wiping their tear-soaked face, and reluctantly states that they were scared of Raph seeing them being weak and vulnerable, and wanted to be seen as "cool" and strong like Raph is.

- "I didn't want you to hate me..." they lower their head, avoiding as much eye contact as possible. Almost immediately, they start panicking again. "Wait, oh gosh," they heave in deeply as they try to focus on anything, raising their arms instinctively - their surroundings blurring together as their mind races. "No, I'm sorry... you can't see me like this, I'm going to mess things up again like I always do, I-" Y/N tries to run away as the tears build up again, but Raph grabs their arm and pulls them back.

- "Y/N".

- He is very, very gentle with them, talking to them in a low voice. But he wasn't going to let them keep running off and avoiding him.

- "Please look at me." They try, with some struggle. "You are not messing anything up. It is okay to cry, to be vulnerable, and openly express how you feel. I'm... worried to find out who made you scared like this. You don't ever deserve to feel like that, Y/N.

- And you are strong, Y/N - your worth is never going to be based on how much you can lift or break with your fists. Your strength may or may not be in physical strength, but you being here with me - right now - your existence proves you are strong," He brings them into a hug, embracing them snugly. "In a lot of ways, that is much stronger than any physical strength I have, and I am so proud of you."

- He holds their head against him, reveling in the feeling of having them so close to him. He closes his eyes, gently leaning some of his weight onto them.

- "Thank you, Raph."

•

Thank you for requesting. :) I hope you enjoyed!

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oikadori · 4 years ago

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hi! can i have some dating headcanons with nishinoya, yaku, and sugawara? thank you! ☺️

DATING HEADCANONS

⇢ Incudes : nishinoya, sugawara, yaku

⇢ Genre//Warnings : f!reader, fluff , kinda suggestive (suga being h on main), swears

⇢ WC~ 1,1K

a/n: of course !! omg i had fun making these sksksk I love my libero squad along with the pretty setter hehehe, hope you enjoy this!! alsoo i changed my banners 😅😅

reblogs are highly appreciated!!

Dating him is such an experience to be honest

Nishinoya is naturally very loud and energetic, you’ll never get bored with him...I SWEAR

His perfect dates consist in doing as much things as he can squeeze into your schedule, arcade dates following by movies and ending in concerts or festivals

imagine jumping with a big crowd, you and nishinoya screaming their hearts out as you sing PLEASEE where do i sign??

Also, expect lots and lots of improvised trips. like, no destination at all. he just casually says “hey pack some clothes, we are going out” and you end up in the beach... or in the cafeteria downtown

I strongly believe that nishinoya is one of the bests persons to find comfort in, he is NEVER too tired for you

Whenever you text him about the bad day you had, he will be in your front door within the next 15 minutes

Nishinoya compliments you 24/7 and laughs the loudest at your jokes, even when they're bad. and his laugh is just SO genuine that you congratukate yourself for it

he unconsciously ends up giving you all of his hoodies and days later he would make a mess in his house looking for them because he forgot you have them

OMFG this baby crow is one of the most clingy and affectionate among the haikyuu boys

It is impossible for him to keep his hands off you! Especially when you are in public. Plants smooches all over your face and kisses your nose because “you look SO cute when you scrunch it up!! Do it again please”

ALSO your breasts are his personal pillows, i'm sorry for you >:) he buries his head in between them whenever he has the chance, mumbling about how soft they are

Dating Nishinoya also includes helping him to dye his hair, he sits with a closed eye smile on your bed, like a puppy waiting for a treat, as you tint his hair. feeling your fingers in his messy hair makes his stomach flip

I see him as the type who will drop everything he is doing, the moment he sees you crossing the door

Whenever you bump into each other in the hallways, he literally runs towards you to plant a passionate kiss on your lips, pulling you by the waist to deepen the kiss as if he hasn’t seen you in years

and the fact he doesn't do it for being a dramatic but for missing you THAT much makes it all so heartwarming :')

Nishinoya is just so proud to be your partner that he introduces himself first as your boyfriend before as karasuno’s libero i want him please >:(

Another short king that treats you like a queen 😌

He is very reliable and supporting but is the type that will also give you lectures when you do stupid shit

if you guys fight, he is not sleeping until you’ve talked it out, he hates going to sleep knowing you are mad at him, he doesn’t care if you end making facetime at 2 am

I bet it is very amusing for Nekoma to watch how his libero goes from angry yaku hitting lev to blushy yaku melting in your kiss all in the same minute

Always waits for you outside your class to lunch, shoulder resting on the door frame and hands on his pockets, a soft smile settling on his lips when you jog up to him

Honestly, he really loves PDA but he will hide it in public…or at least try it

Yaku tells kuroo YOU are the clingy one when in reality he is the one that wraps you like a burrito with his arms whenever you lay on the couch

since he gives me classy vibes, his ideal dates are taking you to a fancy restaurants…I mean have you seen timeskip yaku?? brrrrr

he LOVES to spoil you, like, at least two times per month you get cute necklaces or earrings or both!

gets super blushy when you appear during his matches and gets even worse when you start cheering him up, he start cursing under his breath “why is her voice so nice and sweet???” all while hiding his red face with a towel

really, sometimes he gets super surprised on how weak and soft you make him…which is the reason why kuroo always have a sassy smirk whenever you are around, ready to watch the red mess yaku is about to become

He deadass will get mad at you for how adorable you are and how his heart always seems to be about to burst everytime you laugh

if you sit together in class, he holds your hand under the desk as his other hand hides the silly smile on his face

even though yaku is a very dominant kind of guy he can also be insecure which makes him very possessive with you

remember those necklaces he gives you? They have his initials on them, a subtle way to tell all everyone you are taken

Yaku always makes sure you are packaging all the important stuff in your bag like he seriously would hand you pads or tampons because “I think your period is about this day of the month, right?” *sobs*

oh my god, I’M MELTING, okay give me a sec

All the things you do have the words "sweet" printed all over

don’t get me wrong, suga can be a little perv too. Open mouthed kisses in the storage room and subtle glances at your rear whenever you bend down…but still sweet tho

suga is the type of boyfriend who loves making handcrafts for you, I imagine him making for your 5 month anniversary a little box filled with polaroids of all your dates along with brownies he made himself!

yeah a real sweetheart, however, at the bottom of the box a nice, red bra is waiting for you ;)

He is super touchy-feely his hands always find their way to your hips, fingers digging into the soft skin drawing a few giggles out of you, causing suga to melt

When it comes to disagreements with you, the man is SO WEAK for you. He always ends up indulging you, not able to hold his angry face for too much at your pouty lips

Suga LOVES to see you taking initiative and definitely supports your ideas of dates and activities for both of you

But for him, the perfect dates are strolling across the city at night, watching your face under the lights as you resume him your day, hand in hand.

He just loves hearing you talk, when he can’t sleep he just calls you to fall asleep at the sound of your voice

Remember I said he can’t get angry at you? well that applies to you, too. you can't never get really mad at him, whenever you try to start a discussion he goes “boop” and pecks your nose not letting you talk <33

If he gets jealous, wait, when he gets jealous his perfect way to let everyone know you are taken is by leaving hickeys on strategical spots on you where they are visible enough but not totally exposed,

I feel like suga loves spending time with your family and will introduce you pretty quickly to his own too

Like, at dinners, you two would end up taking care of your little cousins or siblings, and suga can’t help to think how good you would look with your own kids, causing his heart to flutter

When he finishes practice he just rests his head in the crook of your neck, getting intoxicated by your scent before mumbling a sweet “hi, angel” as you drag him out of the gym...

and everyone is like “awwwwww” but that is because they don’t get to see how he is atacking your neck with kisses that will surely leave a mark

Thanks for reading!!

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nerdzzone · 3 years ago

Text

-More Hearts Than Mine-

Summary: Raising a child is hard. Raising a child with one of Hollywood’s biggest stars is even harder. And raising a child with one of Hollywood’s biggest stars who you’re not actually in a relationship with is even harder still.

Especially when a global pandemic is sweeping the world.

With lockdowns and stay at home orders looming on the horizon, the uncertainty of their situation becomes almost too much for Whitney Taylor to handle. Chris suggests that they quarantine together to avoid any potential separations but, given what happened the last time they spent more than a few brief moments in each other’s company, that could cause more problems than it solves…

Chris Evans x OFC

Sequel to: Once Bitten - Twice Shy

Part Two

____

Part Three

I did my best to take Scott's words to heart. It was eye-opening and, while it didn't change my concerns about how Grayson would be affected, it helped me soften my guard a little bit when it came to Chris.

We were both in over our heads, stuck with feelings that we didn't know what to do with and insecurities that left us unable to fight for what we wanted. I had doubts and I had questions, but if what Scott had divulged was true then I did have some sympathy for Chris because I knew exactly how he'd been feeling for the last few years.

So, I decided to talk to him. To hash it out, lay it all on the table and see what he had to say. I wasn't entirely sure I would change my mind about the situation, but I wanted to give him a chance to explain his thoughts and feelings unlike how I'd shut the conversation down after Christmas.

But I didn't count on how chaotic it was to be trapped in a house, all day every day, with a child who was almost three. Even with three adults, there were days when it felt like we were the ones who were outnumbered as we took turns trying to keep him constantly entertained and stimulated. To our credit, it was working and we were managing to keep Grayson from being bored, anxious to go out to a park or noticing that things were all that different, but it meant that I had no time or energy to deal with heavy conversations. Things were fine between Chris and I, we were getting along well enough with no more noteworthy disagreements, but there hadn't been a good time for any kind of heart-to-heart.

Things only got more complicated about a week and a half into our lockdown when Chris had to start doing interviews. He had a new show, Defending Jacob, coming out in a few weeks and he had to start the promo for it.

Most people who were working from home these days with small children running around had way more difficult situations to balance than we did, but we knew it would be tricky to keep Grayson from getting curious and barging into an interview. He'd proven to be quite sneaky when he wanted to be and Chris was anxious about the whole thing. He wasn't a big fan of interviews at the best of times so doing it over Zoom made him even more nervous. He spent the whole morning fretting about it being awkward, concerned that he wouldn't be able to relax and act natural, and it seemed like he was channelling his anxiety into his worries about Grayson. He very much liked to be in control of what the world saw of Gray and having him crash an interview wasn't what he wanted. I completely agreed and assured him several times that I wouldn't let that happen, but I could tell he was still stressed about it as he dragged himself off to get ready.

For the first hour or so that Chris was working, things went well. We read a story and played with some Lego, activities that wouldn't get Grayson too excited and noisy, but when Scott suggested that he curl up on the couch and watch Finding Nemo with him, we ran into a problem.

"Okay!" Grayson cheered, jumping up from where we'd been playing on the floor. "Be right back!"

He took off down the hall and I leapt into action, calling his name and stopping him just as he got to the bottom of the stairs.

"Where are you going, buddy?"

"To get my bear!"

Grayson's room was upstairs, next to Chris' office. He knew where Chris was so I knew there was a good chance he would stop by to say hello on his way past the door.

"Why don't you go get settled on the couch with Uncle Scott and I'll get your bear so you don't miss any of the movie?" I suggested. "Is he in your room?"

"No," he shook his head. "He's in Daddy's office."

I held back a groan, knowing that Gray would not be happy if I explained that he couldn't have his bear for the movie because we weren't allowed in Daddy's office right now. But I also knew that now he'd decided that he wanted to watch a movie, it wasn't likely that he would settle doing anything else either.

"Well, Daddy's very busy in his office right now," I explained. "But I'll go upstairs and see if I can sneak in and get him, okay?"

Grayson agreed to that suggestion and ran off back towards the living room as I glanced at the clock on the wall quickly and hoped that Chris was between interviews. I knew he wouldn't be done for the day just yet, but he had a few lined up so there was a chance that he wasn't currently on a call.

As soon as I pressed my ear to the door of Chris' office, my hopes were dashed. I could hear the sound of laughter echoing through from his laptop so I knew he was in the middle of something, but just as I was about to walk away I heard something that caught my attention.

"You have a son of your own, don't you?" The interviewer asked and I cringed, knowing that it wasn't something Chris liked to discuss. His character in the show was a father though so I wasn't surprised it had come up, it gave them a segue that they hadn't really had before. "How is that going with this lockdown?"

Ever the professional, Chris didn't even hesitate before he answered even though I knew he would be annoyed by the line of questioning.

"Oh, it's great! He's staying with me until all this is over so it's great that we get to spend so much time together," he told the interviewer. "I'm lucky enough to be in a situation where I can just take a few months off until things cool down without too much worry so we've just been relaxing, building blanket forts, watching movies and getting in some bonding time that I miss out on when I'm busy. It's had some challenges, but it's been really nice."

I knew I shouldn't be listening, it was rude to eavesdrop even if the conversation would shortly be broadcast to the whole world, but again, the interviewer's next question had me too intrigued to walk away. Despite all the talking points that he could have chosen from Chris' answer, he zeroed in on one thing.

"He's staying with you for the entire lockdown? Is there a rekindled romance we don't know about?" He asked. "Or is his mother no longer in the picture?"

My jaw dropped. I didn't know who Chris was talking with today, but it wasn't like his team to set him up for any interviews where he would be asked questions like that and most interviewers were too polite to fish for the kind of gossip you'd find in a trashy magazine.

"Oh, I'm not gonna get into all that." Chris' tone was much more clipped than it had been moments before - he was clearly not impressed by the question either. "It's not anyone's business really, is it? But I will say that she is definitely in the picture and one of the best moms that I know. She's staying here with us too."

My heart melted a bit at his compliment even though I knew the words he added at the end meant that we were in for a whole new gossip storm.

It suddenly felt like I really was overstepping by standing at the door listening to this conversation without his knowledge so I headed back downstairs. As I got back into the living room, I pulled my phone out of my pocket and sent a message to Chris:

It would appear that you have a stowaway. I know you're busy, but please return Mr. Bear at your earliest convenience.

I put my phone away as I explained the situation to Grayson, but luckily, he was too interested in the movie to pay much attention to what I'd said. By the time Chris came down with the bear, it was like he'd forgotten that he ever cared about it in the first place.

Most of my attention was on Chris at that point though. The way he scurried into the room, avoiding looking in my direction at all. He looked ashamed and withdrawn and I couldn't hold back a sigh when he left the room quickly as I knew that he was beating himself up over the conversation that he didn't even know I'd heard.

Chris was sullen for the rest of the day. He perked up around Grayson, but whenever Gray was distracted there was a scowl or a frown firmly planted on his face. I wanted to say something, but I didn't know how without confessing that I'd overheard his interview. Given his mood and the ease with which we fell into disagreements these days, that seemed like it would cause more issues than it would help.

The news broke at about eleven that night and I knew because I was suddenly inundated with texts from friends and with follower requests on my private social media accounts. I pulled up the video and watched the interview, feeling another wave of empathy when I saw the annoyance written all over Chris' face as he answered the questions. He'd found a subtle way to shut the interview down almost immediately after the incident and I was proud of him for handling it so diplomatically.

I added it to the list of things that I needed to talk to Chris about whenever I got the chance as I pulled myself away from my laptop and headed to the bathroom to brush my teeth before bed. However, when I got into the hallway, I noticed a light coming up from downstairs. As far as I knew, everyone had gone to bed almost an hour ago, but I had a good idea whose thoughts would be keeping them awake so I headed down to investigate.

My suspicions were confirmed as I walked into the living room and saw Chris on the couch, his phone in his hand and his brow furrowed.

"Uh oh," I started, making his eyes snap up towards me. "Are you doomscrolling?"

The angry look on his face softened slightly as he raised an eyebrow at me.

"Doomscrolling?"

"Yeah," I shrugged with a smile. "That's what the kids call it these days when you spend too long scrolling through the news or Twitter, just soaking in all the bad shit in the world."

Chris chuckled as I moved into the room and sat on the opposite end of the couch that he was on, tucking my feet underneath me.

"I didn't know you were so down with the kids these days."

"I'm getting old, Chris. I'm almost thirty-two, I have to stay cool somehow." I shot him a wink. "But anyway, what are you reading that's making you look so grumpy?"

Chris sighed and locked his phone, putting it on the end table next to the couch.

"I said something in an interview today," he admitted. "Something that I shouldn't have said."

I watched him for a moment, waiting for him to look at me and elaborate, but when he didn't, I spoke up.

"I hope you're not about to tell me that you regret saying what a good mom I am or I'll be really disappointed..."

That comment brought Chris' gaze back to me, his shock evident on his face until it faded into a grimace.

"You heard what I said?"

"I watched the video," I admitted. "I had a flurry of Instagram activity that tipped me off."

"You didn't read the comments, did you?"

There was worry written all over Chris' face when I shrugged.

"Of course I did. Can't have my self-esteem getting too high, can we?" I was teasing, but his look of gloom only deepened. "Chris, it doesn't matter. I'm no supermodel, they're not saying anything I don't already know."

"See, this is what bothers me," Chris snapped. "My so-called 'fans' are out there spewing all this crap about you and you're acting like it's all true, so who cares? Well, I care because it's bullshit and you don't deserve it!"

"I didn't mean it like that," I assured him, keeping my voice quiet in an attempt to cool the situation.

We'd been here many times over the years and I knew how enraged the comments made Chris. He saw right through me, he knew that I took some of the things that had been said to heart, but who wouldn't? It's hard not to take it personally when someone points out your biggest insecurities, the things that you hope no one else notices, the things that you tell yourself can't possibly be true or as bad as you think in your head. It's impossible not to let it get to you a little bit, but I was well practiced at dealing with it and had grown a thicker skin.

At least, when it came to the comments about my appearance. The comments about how I'm not good enough and how Chris could do better always struck a cord, but it was nothing I couldn't handle.

"No?" Chris huffed. "What did you mean then?"

"That I know I'm an easy target because I'm not stick thin with a boob job," I answered, wanting to diffuse the situation before Chris got too upset. "They're cruel and mean, but they're just jealous because they think their dream boyfriend is taken now."

"Well, anyone who claims to be a real fan of mine wouldn't talk like that about someone I care about," he grumbled. "I shouldn't have answered, I should have just ignored the question."

"Actually, I'm glad you didn't. I'm glad you set the record straight rather than have everyone think I've abandoned my child. I would probably get even more hate for that."

"He shouldn't have even asked about it," Chris continued. "It was so out of line. Why can't people just mind their own business?"

"Because everyone adores you and has a burning desire to know everything about you," I teased, stretching my feet out to nudge his leg gently. His lips twitched briefly into a smile, but it faded as fast as it appeared. "Even my friends were all messaging me, asking if it was true like gossiping teenage girls. Everyone wants the Chris Evans scoop."

That comment earned me a chuckle and I relaxed slightly, hoping that he was starting to calm down.

"I'm sure your friends were more interested in the gossip about your life, not because of me."

"I dunno," I shrugged. "They always liked you."

Chris smiled, but a sigh slipped from his lips as he draped his arm over my feet where they rested on the couch next to him. We sat quietly for a moment as I continued watching him, wishing there was something I could say to ease the worry in his mind, but his next words left me a little bit speechless.

"I do get it, you know?" He said, his eyes still fixed firmly on the ground in front of him. "I get why you wouldn't want to be with me. I get that it's a lot to deal with."

My heart sank at his admission and I scrambled to figure out what to say.

It wasn't ideal - discussing our relationship, while he was already feeling quite murderous - but he'd brought it up and it was hard to say when we'd get another chance. Once again, I found myself fighting the urge to bolt for the door, but I swallowed hard and took a deep breath, hoping that this would be a civil conversation.

"Chris, it's not that," I insisted, my voice soft in what I hoped would be a soothing tone. "Maybe they didn't do anything to ease my concerns, but the bullies on the internet aren't what scared me away."

"No?" His eyes flicked up to meet mine. "Then what did?"

He sounded so defeated and I bit my lip to keep my emotions from bubbling up. The truth was that I didn't know where to start. There was too much floating around my head, too many questions and too many explanations that made less sense now that I knew what I knew after speaking with Scott. I was scared, but it was a very justified fear that could only be made sense of by answering his question with another question.

"Why didn't you tell me that you were in love with me?"

Chris raised an eyebrow, but shrugged off the question.

"You didn't seem like you wanted to hear it, Whitney. I told you that I was all in after Christmas and you shut me down pretty fast," he pointed out. "I didn't think blurting out a confession of love would do much to change that."

Had that been what I was referring to, it would have been a fair argument. However, I was referring to long before our latest incident so I shook my head.

"I talked to Scott," I confessed as a slight look of betrayal slid onto Chris’ face. "Don't be mad, he'd had a few drinks and was feeling sentimental. He told me that you were in love with me long before Grayson was even in the picture, but you never told me."

"I slept with you, didn't I?" He questioned, a defensiveness creeping into his tone. "Doesn't that make someone's feelings pretty fuckin' clear?"

"Hardly," I scoffed. "People sleep with people they're not in love with all the time and it becomes even less clear when they meet up afterwards to have a discussion about their relationship and that someone makes no mention of being in love."

"Was it really a discussion? Or did I show up at your apartment just to hear you lay out the ground rules?"

I faltered slightly as I thought back, but after a moment of reflection, I nodded.

"It was a discussion."

"I believe the first words out of your mouth were 'I think we both know that we're better off as friends'," he informed me. "Doesn't leave much room for debate."

"I was scared." That confession came out less confidently, but I found my voice again quickly. "And I assumed that's what you wanted too because you never pushed back."

He cocked his head to the side, a hint of a smirk on his face.

"You weren't the only one who was scared."

"I was the only one who was pregnant," I retorted, my tone growing harsher as my frustrations started to rise. "I was the only one who was trying to make a massive life decision while hormonal and growing another human being inside of them."

"That's fair," Chris nodded, his voice much calmer than I expected after my burst of annoyance. "But I wasn't about to pour my heart out and tell you how I felt when you kept talking about what a mistake we'd made as if you'd never regretted anything more in your life."

"Getting pregnant was a mistake," I clarified. "I love Grayson and I wouldn't change it for anything, but we can't say it wasn't a mistake at the time given our situation."

"A situation that you didn't want to change."

"Only because you never told me how you felt," I shot back. "I didn't want you to commit to something out of a sense of obligation. I didn't want you to put up with me for a few years until you dumped me for someone more in your league who you actually cared about."

There was a look of surprise on Chris' face at that revelation as it became more and more obvious to both of us that we hadn't been as good at communicating as we may have thought. It seemed we'd both been so convinced that we knew exactly how the other person felt that we hadn't bothered to actually ask them.

"But I did care about you," he assured me. "And you never told me how you felt either."

"I slept with you, didn't I?"

There was a smirk on my face as I threw his words back at him despite the anxiety that was bubbling inside me.

"A wise woman just informed me that sleeping with someone doesn't necessarily mean anything," he teased, a soft smile on his face. "But I think it's safe to say that we were both cowards."

"Again, in my defence, I was pregnant," I reminded him. "I was trying to make a logical decision while my brain was muddled with hormones."

"But you could have told me after," he pointed out. "We lived together for year after he was born, Whitney, and you never even dropped a hint."

"Oh, please," I snorted out a harsh laugh. "Do you remember what that year was like? We had a newborn baby who never slept for more than ten minutes at a time and you were flying in and out for the first six months, filming one of the Avengers movies. I was delirious, exhausted and emotionally wrecked. I wasn't in the right head space to give much thought to our relationship."

"So, if I had made a move back then? Would it have made a difference?" He asked. "Because it didn't seem to matter much a few months ago."

This was the real issue at hand.

It was all well and good to talk about the past and how we'd managed to come this far so oblivious to each other's feelings, but the real discussion was where we were at now. And the truth was, that I didn't know.

I opened my mouth to answer, but shut it as my words escaped me. I shifted nervously, shrugging under his stare until a sigh fell from my lips.

"I'm not sure anymore," I admitted. "If you'd told me how you felt back then, if you fought for us to be together then I might've been swayed."

"But now?"

"Now, I think we made the right decision for Grayson."

Chris was still staring me down, his eyes locked on mine as if he was looking into my soul. It was an intensity that was hard to endure and I was relieved when he spoke again, despite how his words made my heart ache.

"But what about the right decision for us?"

"That's not what's important," I insisted. "I've seen so many of my friends struggle through their parents' bitter divorces, I don't want that for Gray. I don't want us to lose our ability to work as a team and put him first."

"Yeah, you mentioned that several times," Chris huffed. "But I don't see why you're so fuckin' convinced that we'd end up hating each other."

His frustration and impatience was shining through and I felt my panic rising again. Chris had made his stance clear and I knew I needed to make a decision soon or my lack of decision would decide for me, but I felt like I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. The thought of not being with Chris made my heart ache especially now that I knew the extent of his feelings, but the thought of being with him and the consequences that could come from that set every anxious nerve in my body on edge.

I found myself scrambling for something to say that was non-committal, but would placate the situation. I floundered until, fortunately, a tiny voice from the doorway saved me.

"Daddy said a bad word..."

I leapt off the couch, desperate for any excuse to get away and Chris raised his eyebrow at my swift reaction. I ignored him as I looked at Grayson, who was rubbing his eyes with one hand and clutching his bear in the other. He looked so small, standing there in his little flannel pajamas and I smiled at the sight.

"That is a bad word," I agreed. "Daddy shouldn't have said it. But what are you doing up?"

"I had a bad dream."

His voice was small as he was still half asleep and Chris stood, following me over as I walked towards him.

"I'm sorry to hear that, buddy," he said, lifting him up in his arms. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No," Grayson shook his head. "It was scary."

"Awe, I'm sorry, sweetheart," I frowned as I rubbed his back, my heart melting at how small he looked in Chris' arms. "Do you want me to tuck you back in or Daddy?"

He rested his head on Chris' chest and pulled his bear so close that his answer got muffled by the stuffed animal's fur.

"I want to sleep in Daddy's bed..."

I looked up at Chris, letting him decide if that was okay, but he was already nodding his head.

"Sure, we can do that," he assured him. "But don't hog all the blankets this time, okay?"

Grayson giggled and I smiled as they headed to the door.

"Goodnight, boys," I called to them before they disappeared. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Goodnight." Chris paused to answer me and flashed me a look that made me feel like a schoolgirl being scolded by the principal. "This conversation isn't over."

It felt like a foreboding warning and it left me so flustered that all I could do was nod before he turned and continued on his way to his bedroom.

He was right.

Our conversation couldn't end there unless we wanted another four years of miscommunication and mutual longing, but I didn't know what to do. I wasn't trying to be difficult, but both options seemed destined to lead to heartache. Of course, I had no evidence to prove that we wouldn't live happily ever after, but he was Chris Evans. He was the man that women all over America, all over the world, would kill to be with. And I was just me. Once I fell off whatever pedestal he'd put me on in his mind and he realized how ordinary and unremarkable I was, it wouldn't last.

And I couldn't spend the rest of my life waiting for the other shoe to drop.

With a sigh, I headed to the stairs. My head was a mess despite my hopes that talking to Chris would bring me some clarity. It seemed I was starting a pattern of coming away from late night conversations with more questions than answers, but I was beginning to think that might be due to the fact that I would never be told what I wanted to hear. No one could make this decision for me and no one could make it a fool proof choice.

There was always a risk when it came to love. I just had to decide if that risk was worth it and start being honest with myself about why I was so scared. Were my intentions really as noble as I wanted everyone to believe? Or was I using Grayson as a shield to protect my own heart from pain as much as his?

Part Four

Tags: @maggotzombie @moonlacebeam @mizzzpink @zaylaugh @flowery-mess @flowerjewels @njrronaldo7 @hockeychick10

#chris evans fanfiction #chris evans fic #chris evans fanfic #more hearts than mine

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jinmukangwrites · 3 years ago

Text

Gifts

Read on AO3

Prompt

Summary: Wild tells of the gifts the past Champions have given him. All that's left is for the others to witness these gifts.

Warnings: Descriptions of injury, temporary character death.

Notes: Finally got a prompt done. Y'all proud of me? If you are, then know I wrote this instead of Chapter 2 of Succumb because I'm an awful creature who has a solid idea for the entire fic except Chapter 2 and I'm avoiding it. Stop being proud of me now.

---

“How about you, Champ?”

Wild blinks from the daze he's fallen into and looks up to see eight pairs of eyes all looking right at him. The moon hangs lazily above them, nothing more than a C-shape tied to the stars to watch them all talk themselves to sleep. Wild’s zoned out of this one, for reasons he can’t really explain why. It’s not that what they’re talking about tonight is particularly dull or offensive. It’s just… well… they’re talking about magic and discussing the common theme that seems most sources of magic that they know has been given to them.

Time and Great Fairies. Hyrule and wise men in caves. Wild’s sure the others all have similar stories, he’s just decided to not listen to them tonight.

“About me?” He asks hopefully. Maybe they have changed topics while he was trying to decide what the woodchip by his boot resembles.

Four leans forward on his knees, wiggling his eyebrows. “Any magical gifts that you’ve been holding out on us?”

Wild tries not to let his disappointment show on his face. “Ah.” He curls his fingers around the hem of his tunic before they could nervously knit with each other on his lap. “Nothing that’s important.”

Besides him, Twilight scoffs. “Nothing that’s important? Cub, either you really are holding out on us or you’re being humble.”

“Wild? Humble?” Warriors snorts. “Perish the thought.”

Wild sighs. “Really, I don’t have any cool stories to tell tonight. I’d much rather listen to you all.”

“Listen, huh?” Four challenges, grinning like an imp. “Who taught Hyrule how to shoot fire from his sword?”

Wild rolls his eyes. “Some old guy in a cave.”

“Actually,” Hyrule says with a soft, apologetic smile, “it was an old man in a basement.”

“What is up with you and old men?”

“Anyway,” Twilight says, giving Wild a hard look, “you’re obviously not listening. Is something wrong? You’re usually more talkative.”

Does Twilight have to be a doting old mother in front of everyone? Wild can feel himself bristling. “Maybe I just don’t feel like talking tonight. Vet isn’t talking and you’re not pestering him.”

“That’s because Vet never talks about himself,” Warriors says, foiling Wild’s entire argument. Legend has a smug look on his face. “Not unless he’s trying to heighten his own ego.” Legend’s smug look falls into a glare.

“Fine,” Legend says. “I’ll tell one. Then Champ can tell one, so that you all will get off both of our backs.”

“It has to be serious, Leg,” Wind butts in, completely oblivious to Wild’s dying hope of getting out of this conversation. “No ‘I got my magic from being super cooler than everyone else’ bull.”

“I wasn’t going to,” Legend snaps. “Besides, I don’t have magic. I have magical items. Which is just as useful.”

“Then what’s that one?” Sky points at the small clay ocarina in Legend’s hands. “You’ve been holding it all night.”

Legend stills and his face softens, and immediately the whole group can tell that whatever that ocarina is, Legend has feelings attached to it. He takes a deep breath. “It’s not very magic,” he says, his fingers rubbing over the holes reverently. “It used to be able to summon a gust of wind to take me wherever I needed to go. It could also awaken the dead under specific circumstances… now it’s nothing but clay. It doesn’t work anymore.”

“Where’d you get it?” Wind asked, and not unkindly. He, like the rest of the group, knows that Legend wouldn’t be holding an item so tenderly if it only didn’t work anymore.

Legend stays silent for a moment, allowing the crickets in the forests to sing uninterrupted. Then, his shoulders fall. “The most beautiful woman I ever met gave it to me. She had the most lovely voice. This… after… after I lost her, I woke up stranded at sea. It was around my neck on a string… it’s all the proof I have that she ever existed.”

Silence hangs over the group like a heavy blanket. Wild can’t help but feel a lob of guilt get stuck in his chest. All he can do is sit and watch Sky lean over and place a hand on Legend’s knee.

“Love is one of the most powerful magics an item can hold, even if it’s just a good memory.”

Legend brings a sleeve to his eye, holding the ocarina tightly with his other hand. “Oh shut it, you sap,” he says through a smile. Sky smiles back, and Wild curls his arms across his chest.

Besides him, Twilight looks at him. Not expectantly, though, but with understanding. Perhaps he knows now why sometimes someone would wish to stay silent during these kinds of nights. Not everyone got magical gifts from old men in caves. Or basements.

But the guilt sits, and no one is saying it’s Wild’s turn to spill some beans. Not even Legend. But how could he stay silent after Legend told something so personal and sad? It’s not fair, even if he’s the only one who thinks so.

He bites the arrow and takes a breath.

“I don’t have magic. I have… blessings. From friends I had before the Calamity.”

For the second time that night, eight pairs of eyes fall onto him.

“I don’t use them much anymore,” Wild continues; somehow his hands have made it to his lap anyways, knitting his fingers together like string on needles, “they gave me everything they had so I could defeat Calamity Ganon. Now that he’s gone, I don’t want to abuse their gifts any longer.”

“I don’t mean to pry…” Four says, “but maybe they gave you everything they had to help you. Maybe they didn’t consider it abuse.”

And somehow, Wild doesn’t feel like Four is prying at all. In fact, it startles a chuckle out of him. “Maybe. But not Revali, that’s for sure. He and I got along worse than Vet and Cap.”

“Not an easy feat,” Warriors says to the others while nudging Legend with his elbow. Legend rolls his eyes. “I’m impressed.”

“What blessing did he give you?” Wild asks. There’s stars in his eyes that always get there when he gets too interested in a story. Though, Wild supposes any story involving a rival-ship greater than their very own Legend and Warriors is something to be interested in.

“It was the power to call upon the gusts of wind he used to command with his powerful wings. He was a Rito, the best there ever was. He could fly into the air without having to jump off of ledges. The wind would carry him up itself, like it belonged to him.”

-o-o-o-o-

Agony is a poison pulsing through Hyrule’s leg. The fall had been great, and it’s a miracle Wild had been there to dive down and at least try to lesson the fall with his paraglider. The ground was weak in these desert-y canyons, and maybe Hyrule shouldn’t have gotten so close to the ledge to warrant his boot’s slipping, but at least Wild was there.

Hyrule’s ankle is broken, or at least badly sprained. Either way, it’s painful enough that he can’t even stand up as Wild paces the bottom of the crevasse they have found themselves in like a pair of cornered animals. The others… they’re close to an hour’s worth of time away. He and Wild were exploring and gathering whatever they could find that might be used as firewood as the sun began to set. It’s been a terribly awful day of traveling in the desert heat, and he and Wild were excited to experience the sunset’s breeze while the others set up camp.

They got too excited. Too far away. There’s no way anyone will hear them if they call. No one will come looking until the sky is black.

And who knows, maybe they won't consider that maybe they fell. Maybe, if they come looking, they won't look down the right scar in the land, and they will burn to death in tomorrow's sun.

“What do we do?” Hyrule asks through an embarrassingly choked voice. He’s been fighting tears since the moment his ankle bent wrongly in their crash landing. He knows Wild will not judge him for sobs, but it doesn’t make it any easier for him to allow any to escape.

Wild sighs and glares up at the lip of the cliff they’ve fallen from. “Any trinkets?” he asks back.

Hyrule bites his lip. He wishes he were like the others and had a trinket for every situation. Legend had promised to give him an old grappling hook he had hoarded away the next time they end up at his and Ravio’s place. “No.”

“Okay,” Wild says. Not angrily. “Okay.”

Determined?

“Champ?”

Wild takes a deep breath and looks down at Hyrule with… fire in his eyes. “I won’t be long. Will you be okay while I fetch the others?”

Hyrule licks his lips and looks down at his leg, already braced with brush twigs and the wrappings that usually decorate Wild’s arms. A cold breeze blows suddenly, making Hyrule shiver and remember the desert only takes what it’s given when it comes to heat. When the sun’s up, it thrives, and when it’s gone…

“Don’t take long,” he replies, even though he doesn’t really know what Wild’s about to do.

Wild nods, shrugging off the cloak he usually always wears and gives it to Hyrule. Hyrule nods his thanks and takes the warm accessory, placing it over his head and wrapping the caped section around his shoulders.

He watches as Wild walks towards the edge of the cliff facing where the others are with camp. Hyrule wonders what he’s about to do as he clings to the edge of the cloak. Wild unfolds his paraglider from his back, baffling Hyrule even more, and widens his stance.

A moment passes. Then another.

Then a gust of wind appears seemingly out from the floor, powerful enough to blow dust back and almost get in Hyrule’s eye if he hadn’t instinctively covered his eyes. There’s a flash of teal through his fingers… then an unfamiliar voice snorts.

“About time, runt.”

By the time Hyrule deems it safe enough to uncover his eyes without getting dust in them, Wild is already high in the air. The miracle gust of wind cyclones in the spot his friend used to be, growing weaker and weaker by the second before it’s gone completely. There’s no sign of whoever made that flash of teal… nor who spoke, but Hyrule doesn’t think too into it as Wild drops his paraglider and grabs onto the upper ledge of the cliff.

Far above him, Wild climbs to safety and looks over the edge. He waves, and Hyrule cannot help the giggle that climbs through his throat as he waves back.

Pain in his ankle be damned, whatever Wild just did was cool, and as Wild turns and runs towards the others he knows he won't be in pain for long.

Not much longer than an hour passes before the others come with their ropes and grappling hooks and worried voices. Wild glides down to him to help carry him up. There’s something about the way he stands that gives Hyrule the feeling that he… realized something today. He gives Hyrule a bottle of health, then helps tie a rope around his waist as his ankle begins to hurt a little less.

As he’s lifted off the ground towards the top of the cliff by his friends, he looks at Wild who is clinging tight to Hyrule’s body like a stronger lifeline than any rope or chain.

“Was that Revali?” He asks, without really thinking.

Wild looks at him with wide eyes, and then a wider smile. “Yeah.”

Hyrule smiles back. “He sounded like an asshole.”

A startled laugh bursts from Wild’s mouth as he throws his head back. “He is an asshole,” he agrees in good nature.

They reach the top. They reach the others. Twilight scolds their ears off the entire way back towards camp, and Hyrule can't stop grinning for his own safety… and for whatever mended in Wild’s heart tonight.

-o-o-o-o-

“What about the others?”

“Well… ah… there’s Daruk. He was one of my oldest friends. The strongest Goron there ever was, though he was a little fearful of dogs.” Wild laughs, as do the others politely; probably imagining the biggest Goron they could be scared of a small fluffy animal. “He had the strength to block anything, and he was always ready to take a blow for the team. Even after… even after… he still protected me. He gave me the ability to call upon even a fraction of that power, that way nothing could hurt me in case my own shield failed. Without him… I would not be here, I’m confident in that.”

-o-o-o-o-

They honestly should have expected an ambush before Warriors was the one to call it out. Four likes to consider himself lucky for coming from a comparatively peaceful time, relatively speaking, but even he should have expected the top of the hill to be lined with determined monsters with big rocks.

The first few moments of watching the boulders come down feels almost like Four is stuck in time. There’s nowhere to run, the expanse of the monsters at the top is too great. Left or right would bring more chances of being hit. They can’t run back down the hill and outrun the danger either. Their only option is to dodge through the rocks until they can get to the top and take out the danger.

Distantly, as time spreads up, Four is aware of Time and Wild each releasing arrows towards the top of the hill, igniting various monsters on fire, but soon it becomes pure chaos. He can only focus on himself as he does his best to jump out of the way of rocks that are much bigger than him. The colors in his brain scream as he tries to remain calm and collected. No Blue, he can’t just jump over the boulders because it will look cool. Red please calm down you’re screaming too loudly. He knows to go left, Green!

It’s a miracle he’s managed to last this long with the confusion. Which is why he’s not surprised when something finally hits its mark. He’s just glad that when the agony of a shattered bone shoots through his body, it’s only his right shoulder that took the brunt of the hit.

Not that he has time to be thankful for that. After the boulder hits into his side, his balance is knocked right out of him. He ends up crashing to the tilted floor in a jumble of limbs and dust. There’s tears in his eyes, and he can barely focus enough to lift himself back up. His entire arm feels like he’s stuck it into the mouth of a dragon—teeth and all. His chest feels tight and his hip all bruised. He wouldn’t be surprised if he’s broken a few ribs as well.

He barely has enough time to look ahead of him from where he lies on the ground. There’s another boulder bouncing right towards him. If… if he doesn’t move now… he will surely die.

But he cannot move. He cannot move because his entire side hurts too badly for him to go at a speed that matters. He closes his eyes and tries to make himself smaller. Maybe, if the goddess decides she likes him today, she will allow the boulder to bounce over him… or something as unlikely.

Either way, he accepts whatever fate he’s about to meet, even as he hears Sky scream his name.

And maybe it’s because he’s a coward and he’s scared, but he opens his eyes to look at his approaching doom. Only… that’s not all that he sees. What he sees is Wild jump out right in front of him with a ball of orange energy surrounding his entire body. A surge of horror swells inside of his belly the moment he sees this. Is Wild serious?!

Then, a heartbeat passes, and the boulder rams right into Wild. What happens next, though, Four would never have guessed. The orange energy explodes in shatters around him. Standing over Wild, however, is a ghostly Goron that’s bigger than anything Four’s ever seen. He shouts as the boulder stops in its tracks, crumbling before his mighty fists.

“I got you, little buddy,” Daruk’s spirit says. Then, the teal spirit disappears with the orange energy, leaving Wild standing there with the shattered remains of the boulder at his feet. Up the hill, Warriors, Legend, Time, and Sky take out the remaining monsters before they can release any more rocks.

Wild turns towards Four with a crazed, adrenaline fueled gaze. There’s a grin on his face though, one that Four finds himself matching.

Next thing he knows, Twilight, Hyrule, and Wild are rushing to his form and shoving various medicine bottles into his face; of which he takes gratefully.

“Thank you, Wild,” Four makes sure to say once he’s finally back on his feet with a makeshift sling over his only slightly aching arm. Wild turns towards him to give a blushing smile. He rubs the back of his neck with his hand.

“I couldn’t just watch you die. It’s the least I could do.”

Four hums. “I’m still thankful. Though… your Goron friend looked big enough to squish me between his fingers.”

Wild grins. “Daruk wouldn’t do that. It’s his hugs you have to watch out for.”

Four’s sure that if Daruk’s hugs are anything like Wild’s, then those hugs would be very tight indeed.

“I will take your word for it, then.”

-o-o-o-o-

“And then there’s Urbosa. She… if you think you’ve met a scary Gerudo, then you haven’t met her.” Wild waves his hands in the air, only slightly aware that he’s getting too invested in this story now. He didn't mean to spill his guts on his past friends tonight, but here he is, living their memory. Passing on their stories to his new friends. He finds he doesn’t mind it as much as he did several minutes ago. He doesn’t know why he was afraid. “She was the leader of her people, and she could summon lightning onto anyone who's ever defied her. She fought armies of Yiga all on her own and came out without a scratch. She’s blessed me with the ability to summon lighting as well. It’s my most powerful attack, and it’s saved my ass more times than I can count.”

-o-o-o-o-

This is bad. Very bad. Time can’t even properly express how bad this is.

An ambush of monsters? That’s manageable. He has confidence in himself and his companions to be able to handle a meager ambush. However, this? This is a whole army of monsters. Lizalfos, apparently, like to group up in camps when they’re not scrambling around in ancient dungeons and temples.

There’s enough to outnumber the heroes five-to-one. It’s not impossible to take them down if they had stuck to the outer edges of the camp and took a good portion of them out with long ranged attacks… however what happened was much less graceful. They walked into the forest, intending to make a camp for the night, just to wander right into a community of Lizalfos armed to the tails.

So now? They’re running; the monsters in an excited chase. Like Time said: This. Is. Bad.

“We lead them to the river,” Warriors suggests, ever thinking of solutions. “We can push them in and weaken their numbers.”

“I say we turn and fight!” Wind shouts. He looks too excited. He pulls a bomb out from his satchel and before Time can say anything, the boy turns around and throws it at their pursuers. There’s a blast, a few screeches, but nothing significant happens. The numbers are too great. Wind is pulling out another bomb.

“The river,” Time says, nodding at Warriors. Wind cheers as another explosion erupts. He leaves the boy to it. As long as he keeps up. “It’s the best bet.”

Time turns his head to tell the others about the makeshift plan, but before he can say a thing Wild looks him straight in the eye. “Have everyone get as far as you can away, I know what to do.”

“What?” Time asks, baffled.

Wild doesn’t explain. He just turns heel and runs the other way towards the enemy.

“Cub?!” Twilight shouts, turning around as well to grab his wayward protégé, but Time grabs his shoulder and keeps him running in the opposite direction. Twilight gives him a panicked look.

“I don’t know what he plans,” Time explains, “but he seems confident. Trust him.”

Twilight swallows and nods. Time shouts at the others to pick up the pace.

Behind him, the Lizalfos screech in delight, a sign they and Wild have now met face-to-face.

Whatever you’re about to do, wild one, do it now.

He doesn’t have to wait long. The smell of ozone becomes intoxicating all within a heartbeat. The hairs at the back of his neck rise as the sky goes impossibly dark for the time of dusk that it is. Then, light flashes all around him in thunderous claps. He can barely hear the sound of screaming monsters over the bolts. Time can’t help but stop in his tracks and turn, lifting a hand above his brow to see green lighting like he’s never seen before attacking the earth through the trees.

As soon as it begins, it ends, and the sky brightens with silence.

Time doesn’t waste time running forward. What he finds when he runs towards the small clearing Wild had met the monsters in is something he will never forget. Static energy seems to curl around his hand, raised into the air and on the end of a snap. Beside him stands a tall Gerudo woman, cloaked in a ghostly aura, her back towards the others and her hand on Wild’s shoulder in triumph and fierce protection. There’s nothing but black, charred corpses of monsters around them.

Time watches, as do the others, transfixed as Urbosa looks down at Wild and smirks.

“You should have called earlier, my desert flower.”

-o-o-o-o-

Everyone looks so transfixed, that Wild almost moves on without really thinking about it. Only… the words catch in his throat. He finishes telling of Urbosa, and just… freezes. His hands are back in his lap, wringing each other out.

He was so engrossed with his own stories that he’s forgotten that while he loves each of his past friends equally… not all are so easy to talk about.

The others must sense his inner struggle, as none of them call out his sudden silence. He knows that if he decided to stop now and not tell them of his last blessing… they would not argue. They must know this pause is similar to when Twilight stops talking about his adventure when he reaches the point where he meets a mysterious companion. Similar to when Time pauses in his magical tales of his childhood. Similar to when Sky looks off in the distance with his voice trailing off as he tells of special places in the sky.

It’s a pause of loss. A pause of something cherished. A pause of something that you fought so hard for, but will never come back.

A hand falls on top of his own. He recognizes the shape of Twilight’s calluses without having to look up at him. “You do not have to force yourself to continue,” he says.

Wild shakes his head. “I’m alright. I can continue…”

A beat of silence. Wild takes a breath.

“Last is… Mipha. Not only was she the most beautiful Zora I’ve ever met, but also the most beautiful soul. She… would always be there for me… whenever I got hurt. She could heal my wounds better than any potion. I…” his throat bobs, the words are no longer coming. “I cannot bring myself to tell of her gift. It’s too special. I pray I never have to use it again, nor must any of you witness it.”

-o-o-o-o-

Twilight didn’t know what to think when the attack had begun. It didn’t start with a shout. It didn’t start with the enemy running screaming out from the shadows of the trees with swords raised. It didn’t start like any kind of monster attack that Twilight had grown so used to.

It’s probably why they were unprepared for an attack by something smarter than monsters. Something that has no problem sitting quietly in the trees, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. He’s heard that there’s a group of former Sheikah in Wild’s world who have it in for the hero’s life, he just never really expected to meet them.

That’s probably why the arrow met it’s mark too. They’ve all grown accustomed to the sloppy ambushes put together by monsters. It’s the only thing Twilight can think of to justify how none of them saw it coming until there was a thwip of a feathered arrow flying through the air… and landing with a thunk in Wild’s stomach.

Wild fell to the ground, and with a flash of cards and light appeared several Yiga Clan members. Nobody stopped to stare. It was pure rage from the heroes at that point, and as soon as it began the Clan members all put their hands together and retreated into seemingly thin air. It all ended about as soon as it began.

And the only thing he could think about now is Wild laying there on the ground in a growing pool of his own blood. The arrow still sticks out of his midsection, undoubtedly having hit something important judging by the trail of red going down the corners of his mouth.

Twilight is the first to run up to his side, but thanks to the quick thinking of Warriors, he’s not the first to offer a way of healing.

However, by the time the bottle of the red potion reaches his life stained lips… it’s too late. Twilight can only stare in horror as the light leaves Wild’s eyes.

The Yiga Clan… they’ve succeeded… and everyone knows it when Warriors falls backwards in defeat to sit on his heels, looking down at the full bottle of healing in his hands. Sky falls to his knees. Hyrule chokes a cry. Twilight's sure the rest of them are feeling their own reactions of grief, but he can no longer pay attention to anything but his own.

He’s… he’s failed. The one person he swore he would protect… pass on his ways… his stories… his teachings… it’s all for nothing. All it is now is a gaping hole in his heart. His cheeks are wet with tears that came too quickly.

Suddenly, something happens. There’s a flash of teal, and somewhere behind him someone gasps. Twilight can only watch with wide, tear-drowned eyes, as the teal swirls around into the glowing form of a beautiful Zora.

All eyes are on her, but hers are on Wild. There’s a fondness to her face that could be mistaken for sadness. Her hand brushes his cheek, and to Twilight's surprise Wild blinks and breathes in a soft breath. The hole in his stomach glows bright blue… and the arrow dissipates in shining bubbles.

“I will always heal you when you need me, my love.”

Then, she’s gone before anyone, including Wild, can respond.

Wild slowly raises himself to his elbows, blinking and smiling sheepishly like he’s never gotten even a scratch.

“I’m sorry you all had to-” he begins, but Twilight cuts him off by launching himself forward and wrapping the idiot in his arms. Mipha’s gift, the one he wouldn’t tell them about because it was too special, the one he never wanted them to witness…

He’s such an idiot.

“Shut up,” Twilight says through a tight breath. “Thank the spirits… just let me hold you.”

Wild doesn’t say anything, he just returns the embrace and the hold just as tightly.

Thank Hylia and all of the goddesses for this miracle. Wild clearly has friends that care so much about him that they would protect him fiercely even after their deaths. Twilight knows that from now on, he will spend his nights praying thankfulness to them. Wild is a formidable hero, one of the best in fact, yet Twilight can only imagine where he would be without these gifts. Imagining it makes his gut twist, however, so he squeezes his hold just once before letting go.

He smiles at the younger boy, and Wild smiles back, everything that needs to be said being translated there alone. You scared me. I’m sorry. Don’t apologize, just be more careful. No promises… but I will try.

The wordless conversation passes between them in a moment, and the moment is broken by Wind pouncing onto Wild. Wild, the poor boy, is shoved straight onto his back from the force of the tackle, yet he’s laughing as Wind calls him an idiot over and over. Everyone else gathers as well, to tell him they’re glad he’s alive in their own ways. Time places a hand on Twilight’s shoulder and shares a knowing look.

“Let’s set up camp early tonight,” he says, and Twilight cannot help but agree.

As Time announces the plan to the others, separating the others and telling them to give Wild some space, Twilight lets his heart calm. Wild always says he was alone in his adventures, but now he knows that that wasn’t all true. He also knows now why Wild doesn’t abuse the abilities his friends gave him.

With a silent vow, he promises Revali, Daruk, Urbosa, and Mipha that he will work harder to protect their boy. For now, Wild has been barred from making dinner tonight, and Twilight has to be sure that Hyrule gets nowhere near the cooking pot.

#linked universe #hero of the wild #jin writes #fanfiction #violence tw #temporary character death #ficlet #blood tw

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oftenderweapons · 3 years ago

Note

Sooo, about the ask thing. First off all congratulations I love you and your writing 💜 you seem like such a nice, intelligent and funny person. But was thinking what if namjoon comes home drunk and guilty about something he did and vixen comforts him. Love u💋

Title: Drunk (&) In Love

Pairing: Namjoon x reader (nicknamed Vixen)

Wordcount: 2.6k

Genre: crack, fluff, (also, vaguely allusive)

Rating: 18+ cause THESE TWO ARE A MESS FOR EACH OTHER

Synopsis: apparently Namjoon's stag party went a bit too wild. Mostly since he was drinking guilt away. What could that possibly be about?

Trigger warnings: swearing, consumption of alcohol, horny!drunk Joon, he clumsily tries to seduce his fianceé in front of yoonjintae (second-hand embarrassment), stressing over vows, mentions of kinky letters, they discuss future and the fear of marrying young and pretty much out of the blue and they be mentioning the idea of having kids. Also, watch Vixen being the caregiver.

Author's note: Thanking the sweetheart @ironicarmy !!! I love exchanging WIPs and Beta reading! It was so fun and I AM LOVING YOUR WIP SO HARD IM GONNA EXPLODE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! can't wait for it to be out so I can fangirl in public LOLOLOL; also thanking @dopesportsoperatorzonk for this request! (I got your feminism ask, I promise I'm almost done, I wanted to have a quite thorough view before replying and I'm still thinking about some stuff, but it'll be readdy super soon!!!)

Here's my masterlist, btw, and enjoy 💜✨

You weren't supposed to wait up for him, but it was like your sixth sense was telling you to do precisely that. And your premonition turned especially accurate once you were met with the sorry sight of Namjoon hanging off Taehyung's and Seokjin's body, grinning as he saw you appear at the door, head to toe smitten, only to turn to his friends with a sneer as he realised you were wearing his favourite silk robe. The deep crimson colour seemed to spark the colour of your hair on fire, and make the lineaments of your face sharper, older, with a kind of allure he still couldn't understand. “Little fox,” he said, going grabby hands while his arms were still around his friends' shoulders.

You tried to keep your expression stern as you looked at the two men literally holding him up. “What is this? Didn't I tell you to bring him home whole and safe?”

Taehyung lowered his gaze to the floor.

“Is this your idea of safe, Seokjin? I expected better.”

“You know him. He did this to himself.” Yoongi spoke neutrally from behind the three.

“Yoongi. Him being a fucking grizzly doesn't mean he can hold his liquor. Bring him in,” you said, freeing the entryway for the triplet coming in, Yoongi in tow.

“We should have brought him to the dorms,” he muttered.

“Dorms?!? Aneeyo…” Namjoon babbled, shaking his head, falling with his ass on the sofa. “No babylove in dorms,” he said with a hiccup. “Hello, little one,” he purred, grabbing your hips and trying to pull you towards him.

You blushed and slapped at his wrists. “I'll deal with you later—”

“Feisty brat,” he spoke sultrily, making Yoongi shake his head while Seokjin and Taehyung snickered before being chastised by your scolding stare.

“How come he's drunk off his ass and the three of you are perfectly okay?”

“He's the one getting married,” Taehyung replied, matter of factly. “And yes, he was the one who swallowed a bottle of hard liquor without even flinching.”

You glance at Namjoon with a scornful expression.

He did some very drunk, very clumsy attempt at a wink that made you inhale as you desperately looked for a crumb of patient left.

“You'd better go home, before I smack you all on the head,” you said, shooing them off.

“You'd have to reach it first,” Taehyung muttered, making Seokjin giggle, Yoongi rubbing his face at the verbal violence that was about to come.

“Kim Taehyung. I may not be tall enough for your royal head, but your girlfriend is my best friend. I won't say much more because I'm sure your friends aren't interested in your ass getting bruised.”

Yoongi smiled smugly at that one.

“Hell yeah…” Namjoon chuckled from the sofa, one hand reaching for the back of your thigh.

“No. Not now.”

“Later then?” He asked with puppy eyes before they turned into a very tipsy version of his intense dragon glance. “You’re so sexy when you’re mean,” he rumbled, a hand reaching for your thigh underneath the robe.

“Kim Namjoon, if you don’t stop I will unwife you in this instant.” Still, the other three men in the room were a mess of embarrassed coughing and teasing snorts. “You can all go home right now,” you said with a curt tone.

“You’re not gonna be able to take him to bed by yourself.” Yoongi cocked an eyebrow as he spoke calmly.

“Mh, Vixen, take me to bed, please,” Namjoon murmured as he tried to seduce you, just as you looked at him and replied, “No need to take him to bed. He’s sleeping on the sofa tonight.”

“See? I told you she found out! She has a sixth sense for this stuff! She can sense it! She can smell fear! I told you!!!” Namjoon babbled, grabbing your wrist. “Little fox...” he cooed, making a fool of himself.

“Go home. All of you. Now.”

Taehyung was the first to leave without even saying goodbye. He knew he would pay for it. Seokjin was the next, saying bye to Namjoon very briefly before bowing to you — just slightly. “I’m sorry for the inconvenience, goodnight,” he apologised, making his way out.

“Yoongi?”

He rubbed his neck. “I’m sorry. Really. I— I didn’t do my job.”

You shook your head. “This is a mess I’ll have to deal with.”

“You know you’ll kind of have to deal with him for the rest of your life, right?” Yoongi looked at Namjoon, head in his hands, fingers tugging at it nervously.

You followed his gaze, meeting Namjoon in the poorest of states. “I know. He’s my business now. Go.”

Yoongi left without much resistance after that, the door of your apartment finally shutting for good.

“I’m sorry,” Namjoon said, staring up at you as you stood before him. “I fucked up, I’m sorry.”

You placed your hands on his cheeks. “What happened, Joonie bear?”

He shook his head, lip going wobbly. “I’m so sorry!” he babbled again, eyes glossy with unshed tears.

“Oh, no, baby…” you managed to whisper before he dove for your lap, burying his face there. “What happened, love?”

He shook his head.

“Nothing’s gonna change the fact that I love you, big bear.” You caressed his hair as his voice confessed, half-muffled against your tummy.

“I sneaked a look at the dress.” You could hear his words coming out from a pout.

“Joonie—”

“Please don’t unwife me!” He cried out, his voice way too high pitched. “I don’t want to sleep alone ever.” He hugged your legs and held you closer. “I want to sleep next to you until I die.” He got even more emotional as he went on. “I want you to always pet my hair and tell me you’re proud of me and cook for me and be my sweetheart and my babylove and my little fox forever, even when we’re old and I get bald.”

You smiled and invited him to let go of your legs before sitting down, your legs slightly parted laying across the sofa. “Come here, big bear,” you said, patting your stomach. He did as he was told, laying his head below your chest and stretching his long body all over the seat. He struggled a little, his sense of balance temporarily worse than usual. “Soon I’ll be lawfully your bride. Forever. We’re almost there, honey. Just a week.”

He nodded.

“And then I’ll be your little fox until I’m nothing but ashes. And then some,” you reassured him, petting his lovely head, digging your fingers into the knots in his upper back.

“Writing the vows was so difficult.”

“I know baby,” you kept rubbing at his trapezoi until he released a relieved grunt. “I know that must have been really stressful for you.”

“I had to rewrite them sixteen times. Sixteen!” His hand absentmindedly reached your thigh and started rubbing small circles there. “Everytime, they were too long, or too cliché, or something I just couldn’t read in public because you know our letters.”

“I know our letters,” you confirmed, thinking about his messy handwriting on cheap paper, and entire sheets of words that he sent you everytime something important happened, everytime he had to travel for his job, everytime he just needed to make love to you on a deeper level. And then, thinking of your replies, always heartfelt, emotional, with fine calligraphy on expensive ivory sheets often marred with rough spots where a tear fell — most of the time because of joy and gratitude and obliterating, overwhelming love. “Will you read to me the other sixteen versions too, once we’re alone?”

He nodded. “I’ll read them all. I’ll write new ones every day. Small, simple, absolutely mundane. Stuff like, ‘I’ll do the dishes tonight’, or ‘Let’s go out for dinner’, or ‘I wanna grow old with you’ or ‘I don’t wanna watch that porn tonight, let’s just stare into each other’s eyes while naked and have the best tantric sex ever performed’.”

You chuckled and placed your hand atop of his. “I like the last one.”

“But I couldn’t say it in front of your parents, therefore I couldn’t write it in our vows.” He scoffed and shook his head before planting it between your breasts, nosing at the lapels of the robe until he could kiss your naked skin.

“I might have written something along those lines in one of my drafts.” Having this conversation with Namjoon while he was halfway drunk off his ass was extremely entertaining; however, you felt sad at the possibility of him not remembering this moment.

“What else did you write in that draft?” He closed his eyes, waiting for your soft voice to calm him down.

You smiled and slightly teared up at the thought, his chin propped on your chest, one of his thumbs reaching out to dry up a tear. “I wrote that I hope I get to make you smile every day and see that insanely cute and sexy dimple of yours every morning after you wake up. And I want to be the only one listening to your deep bedroom voice waking me up. And I want to listen to you as you talk to our children. I wanna hear all the stories, and watch your smile shine on their faces.”

Namjoon hid his face against your chest, feeling tears roll down his cheeks.

“I want them to have your eyes. I want to see your complete wonder as they learn about the world, as you teach them about the world in that grand and beautiful way you see it.” You sniffled and he cupped your face, kissing your lips so slowly, the heavy tang of liquor barely tainting the moment.

“I want to walk by your side, until we’re too tired to walk and watch time pass by, without worries, without haste. I don’t care where we’re walking because you were the place I was destined to be.”

Namjoon couldn’t explain tenderness or love or devotion or faith as deep as the ones he felt for you. He probably wasn’t skilled or trained enough.

“I know we’re young. I know this is more of a bet than an actual marriage. I’ve seen people who have been together for years part ways so easily and I don’t even know why you said yes to me. Sometimes I doubt I’m deserving and I see in how many ways I’m lacking and I ask myself, 'why the hell did she say yes to me?' ” He snickered sarcastically. “I wouldn’t have said yes to myself.”

You shook your head and kissed his brow.

“But I’ve been with other people and you have too and… I don’t know, sometimes I feel like this will take a lot of effort but then I hear you laugh, I hear you calling my name and I know, I can feel that that’s what it is supposed to sound like.”

You smiled at him, fixing your position so he could lay on you without worrying about smashing your body.

“I’m so confused and so grateful for this. It’s like… Suddenly winning the lottery. One minute you’re just a person and next you realise you’re going to be a husband. And you don’t know what’s going to happen to you, how your life is going to change, but with you I’m not scared.” He chuckled. “Well, I am. But you make me braver than my fears. And I know I could lose you any day. I could fuck up, or we could just drift apart or something. But any moment spent with you is bigger. It’s better and brighter.”

By now you were a teary mess, face drenched in tears, his arms around your torso as he held onto you. “My soul has found a home in you and I will cherish it. I’ll take care of that home. I’ll make sure nothing damages it. I’ll help you work on it if you want to change it. I will make more room when our family gets bigger. I will fix it when I can. I’ll stay by your side when I’m not skilled enough to heal you. To fix you.” He sniffled, voice hollow and weak as he spoke through a lump in his throat. “And I’ll leave if you ever ask me to.”

You shook your head and hugged him, letting him sob in your arms. “I hope I never lose you.”

“Don’t be a silly bear,” you comforted him, lulling him, holding him close to your heart. “I’ll be your bride. Your spouse. Your wife.” You kissed his head. “And your home. Your relief. Your dirty, secret affair. Your devoted companion too. Your goddess and your toy. I’ll be your friend. And the mother of your children, when we want to.”

God, if he wanted to… But first, he needed to enjoy having you all to himself for a couple more years. Just to make sure you hadn’t been both bold and immature and absolutely stupid about getting married almost two years after meeting for the first time.

“So I’m not getting unwifed for sneaking a peek at the dress?”

You shook your head. “It looks completely different once worn.”

“Really?” His expression exploded with euphoria.

You smiled. “Really.”

His drunken grin was back. “So I’m gonna sleep on the bed right?”

You acted as if you were even thinking about it. “You’re really drunk.”

“I’m soberer now.”

“And you embarrassed me in front of your friends,” you reminded him with a cocked eyebrow.

“Not my fault my wifey’s so hot,” he said with a slightly more accomplished wink.

“Not your wifey yet,” you reminded him.

He tutted. “Just a matter of days.” He kissed your sweet spot, on the side of your neck. “It’s only a technicality.”

You looked at him suspiciously. “A technicality, you say?”

He nodded and held you tighter.

“This technicality could still leave you at the altar, waiting,” you teased.

“Come on, I want to sleep next to you.” He kissed your cheek. “On our bed.” He kissed you again. “Where we’ll be making so many babies.”

“Stop right there, mister.” You placed a finger against his plush lips before you shook your head no. “No babies for a few years. I want you all mine, hubby.”

He chuckled and pressed his forehead against your chest bone. “Okay, fine, but I just meant hypothetically. You know, for practice.”

“Yeah, I think I could use some practice. I want to be perfect at it.”

He smiled and kissed your nose. If only she knew how perfect she is, he thought, haphazardly sitting up and waiting for you to help him on his feet, the whole discourse sobering him up enough that he managed to sit on the bench in the bathroom as you washed his face and brushed his teeth, as you undressed him and helped him in the shower, undressing and joining him, his body too tired and unstable to initiate anything fancy.

And then you towelled him up, rubbing body lotion on his always-too-dry legs before helping him in his boxers.

And through the process, he understood how it was that you loved him so much anytime he got you ready for bed. He should let you do this more often. Especially when he wasn’t exhausted or drunk, so he could properly enjoy being cuddled and fondled and babied.

What he didn’t expect was for it to feel so comfortable when you slid up against his back on the bed, spooning his ridiculously large body with your smaller one. “Sleep tight, big bear,” you said before kissing his nape. “Eight more sleeps and we’ll be married.”

He smiled. “Goodnight, little fox.” And with that, he caught your hand in his and fell asleep.

#kim namjoon fluff #namjoon crack #bts fanfiction #bts fanfiction blog #namjoon drabble #houseofddaeng #52hertz #thebtswritersclub #thetruthuntoldnet #namjoon x reader #namjoon x yn #namjoon x vixen

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tsukibraun · 4 years ago

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Pragma Love; Jean Kirschtein x reader

genre: angst, hurt/comfort, fluff

type: series, blurb

summary: you and jean slowly develop feelings for each other over time, but you both quickly learn that love isn’t as easy as you thought

warnings: feelings of worthlessness (you get better in the end tho cause you’re a legend, obviously)

listen to: Crush- Yuna, Usher

part 1/2

read part 2 here!

Self-worth is a tricky thing. You have to know when to be humble and when to humble others. You have to be able to determine what’s just a small flaw in someone’s personality and what’s them trying to walk all over you. You have to have enough love and respect for yourself without becoming a complete narcissist. You have to know what type love you deserve and how to reject the love you don’t like. And when someone tries to challenge your worth, you have to be ready to honestly defend yourself.

This is something you’d struggled with for a long time. It wasn’t easy being able to discern people’s intentions or to come up with a reason for why they treated you the way they did. Yeah, sure, this person could just be a total jerk, or you could’ve done something to deserve the harsh treatment. Maybe you really hurt them without realizing; maybe they’re just reacting that way to defend themselves. They could be a bad person, but what if it was the other way around? You never wanted to assume anything about anyone, but in recent years you’ve learned that sometimes that’s what you have to do.

That was the first thing you noticed about Jean. You witnessed the fight he’d had with Eren in the lunchroom one night. They both retaliated back at each other, but there was something different about the way he was doing it. Eren was clearly angry and wouldn’t let someone challenge his opinions, but Jean- Jean was beyond confident. He wasn’t threatened at all by Eren or his opinions; in fact, it seemed Jean knew he was right, at least in his head, and didn’t mind letting someone know that. He was confident in himself, like he knew he’d come out as the victor; but even if he didn’t, you had a feeling he wouldn’t be too bothered by it. He seemed like the type to just be proud of making his point.

At that time, you couldn’t imagine getting into an argument like that with someone. If they disagreed with you, even if you were clearly right, you would just let it go. ‘There’s no reason to put up a fight’, you’d say, ‘they have a valid reason to think what they think’. Even if they persisted after you clearly would not retaliate, you’d either end up agreeing with them to get them off your back or just sit and take it. Confrontation wasn’t an option and must be avoided at all costs, even if you weren’t the one that started it.

That was the first thing Jean noticed about you.

You were very quiet and laid-back; you often didn’t say much when you guys were in groups. You would just sit back and listen, quietly laughing at jokes from time to time. You weren’t quiet forever, though. After a couple of months you started to open up more; not too much, but it was progress. Little by little you would start to engage in group discussion, agreeing with someone, cracking a joke, or adding to the conversation in general. He thought it was so weird. You clearly had a lot more to say but you just...didn’t. You always bit your tongue and let someone else say it, or just let the idea disappear entirely. He didn’t pester you at first, though. He wanted to see how you would come out on your own.

There was one night, though, where he was really irked by your shyness.

It was late the night before an expedition. You guys were supposed to be asleep by then, but the night before a mission is always a restless one. While some scouts were responsible enough to get some shut eye, you, Jean, Berdolt, Reiner, Mikasa, Eren, Sasha, Krista, and Ymir had other plans. All of you sat in the lunchroom, making casual conversation. It was simple things, like games you would play as kids, things you hated, funny stories from before you became scouts. Eventually, though, you began to discuss your current reality. At first it began with the EDM gear, talking about improvements, how hard it was to use, what you liked about it, etc. Then you came to the topic of Titans. Many different things were talked about here, but there was one question that made everyone tense up: If you could only save your family or fellow cadet, who should you pick?

Ymir asked this question, of course, smirking at the change in atmosphere. This was a very sensitive question for many reasons, but you didn’t think too much of it. Everyone is different with their own experiences and reasons for why or why they wouldn’t do certain things. Eren was the first to answer. “What kind of question is that? You’d save your family, obviously.” No one answered for a while, each person contemplating their answer. “Do you guys seriously have to think about this?” Eren pestered. Finally, Jean answered. “As much as I can’t stand you, Eren, I’ll have to agree with you on this one.”

Everyone else began to give their answers and it started a small debate, but you were still thinking. Jean wondered if you were just gonna sit this one out again, and honestly the idea irritated him. But to his surprise (and everyone else’s) you gave an answer. “I’d save the cadet.” Everyone went quiet and stared at you, somewhat because they were shocked you answered, and somewhat shocked of your answer. Eren in particular didn’t like it. “Are you serious? You’d pick a soldier over your own family?” The tone in his voice made you anxious, but you still decided to explain yourself.

“Well, it’s not like I don’t love my family or anything but...in most cases, the cadet is more important...in practical ways at least. I’d obviously try to save my family afterwards but-“

“How heartless are you?” He interrupted. You felt a lump form in your throat as you predicted the confrontation that was about to ensue. “How could you say that? A soldier is more important than your mother, then? Sister? Father?” You gulped, trying your best not to freak out in front of everyone. You took a couple seconds to make sure he was done before speaking again. “Well...I don’t really view you all as just soldiers,” you trailed off looking at your feet, “I do care about all of you. I don’t hold the people I care about one against the other. I care for each of them all the same.”

“So, in this certain scenario, although I would never want my family to die, saving the soldier is more practical. They’re an extra set of hands, skill, thinking ability- we all know how devastating it is to lose a soldier. Everything becomes incessantly harder. What if they were really needed for future fights? What if they were an important asset? And, if I were able to save them, they could help me possibly save my family.” You finally looked up for a second, seeing everyone’s reaction to your words. You immediately looked somewhere else so you could finish your point.

“Saving a cadet isn’t just saving them, it’s also saving the rest of us. If I were to go after my family, what other things would I miss? More Titans coming? A retreat?A change of plan? And even if I did save them, it’s another liability.” You finally looked Eren in the eyes, seeing his clenched fist and strong glare. “Unfortunately, in this world, we can’t always go after what we want. Sometimes we have to go after what we need, even if that means losing something we want. Our decisions don’t just affect us- they affect everyone.”

A long silence followed the end of your tangent. This was the most you’d ever said in one go, and they didn’t quite know how to take it. They didn’t know you had such detailed thinking, either. They shared glances with each other before some began to speak again. “You know,” Berdolt said rubbing his chin, “when you put it like that, I can see your point.”

“Yeah,” Krista agreed, “I’m not sure I would do the same thing, but I can see where you’re coming from.” Eren scoffed. “You guys are delusional. The only reason you’re agreeing with her is because you pity her.” You straightened up, palms sweating. He could be right; you saw the looks on their faces when you were done. They could just be trying to keep you from feeling dumb. Before you could say anything else, Jean came to your defense. “And what’s that supposed to mean?” He asked, cocking his head to the side and leaning forward.

“You know exactly what I mean,” Eren continued, “the girl never says anything!”

“And so what if she doesn’t,” Jean asked, “she’s not bothering you. Why do you care so much?”

“I don’t-“

“Then leave her alone,” he interrupted, “She’s allowed to have her own opinion just like the rest of us. If you’re gonna get that pissed about it, maybe you should go to sleep.” Eren quickly stood up, ready to fight with Jean again, but Mikasa quickly stopped him. You looked between the two of them not quite sure of what to do; you decided not to say anything more to Eren since you had clearly made him upset. Instead, you quietly tapped Jean’s arm and gave a quiet “Thank you.” He gave you a small smile. “Don’t mention it. You know, though,” he said leaning closer to you, “you really need to learn to stick up for yourself. You can’t be so quiet all the time or else stuff like this is gonna keep happening.” He was so close you swore he could hear your unsteady heart rate; still, you returned his word with a small smile and nod.

Ever since then, you two were close.

It wasn’t necessarily a closeness that was outwardly established between you two, it was just there. If he saw you getting anxious, depending on the situation, he would invite you over to where he was. If not, he would give you a certain look, similarly to asking if you were okay or telling you everything was okay. You sat close to each other during meals; if one of you had a smaller portion than the other, you would give a piece of your meal without saying anything. You made sure you were in eyeshot of each other, whether that be on an expedition or simple training. It wasn’t an obsessive thing, just comforting.

Being around Jean made you open up more. Slowly, you began to be okay with showing others who you were. You began to talk louder, laugh more, speak your mind (with tact, of course), and stand your ground. It wasn’t to Jean’s level, but it was there. You noticed other small differences, too. If you needed help with something, you weren’t afraid to ask for it. You could come into a conversation without overthinking it. You began to speak to other people first instead of waiting for them to speak to you. You could walk up to a group of people without feeling like you were intruding. You were able to really live, now. And it was with his help.

The more you came out of your shell, the more Jean absolutely adored you. Sometimes he would be the one to sit back and observe; he would watch you talk and laugh with everyone and be completely infatuated with you. Your laugh, your smile, your humor, your kindness, your little mannerisms; the more and more he was with you, the more he realized he was in love with you. Completely in love with you. So much so it actually started to hurt.

Although he loved being around you, knowing that any of the cadets could have a chance of sweeping you off your feet frustrated him. Since you came out, everyone noticed your charm. The boys had complimented you a couple times, to which Jean told them all to shut up. He wanted to tell you how he felt, and he eventually would, but he had no idea when. He had to use tact like you did so you wouldn’t be too shocked and reject him, but he wasn’t quite sure how. Although you two were close, he had no idea what you wanted in a guy, especially not how you’d want to be confessed to. You didn’t seem to want much from anyone, but there was a part of you he didn’t know yet; the romantic part- that part of you with anyone was completely closed off. He didn’t want to ask you, either, because it was clearly something you weren’t too comfortable talking about.

He had no idea what to do, which was a pretty rare occurrence, at least when it came to women. Either way, he was going to tell you. He just had to figure out when.

Meanwhile, you were completely ignoring your feelings for Jean. Although you were a lot more open with everyone, there were certain parts you kept from them, even from yourself. You noticed the butterflies in your stomach, a different type of longing for his presence, him popping up in your head at random times. You knew how you felt about him, but you continued to lie to yourself. “It’s nothing,” you’d say, “I’m just overthinking it.”

You’d noticed him staring at you with a certain look in his eyes; the way he’d smile at you, the way he’d purposely brush your hands together when walking by, him being more protective and watchful of you- it was little stuff, but clearly different than what it’d been before.

And you absolutely loved it.

You didn’t notice, but you began to do the same thing. Smiling at him if you saw him sleep, fussing at him if he ever got hurt, making sure he had everything he needed at all times, fixing his collar or hair when it was a mess; everyone else saw it except you.

One day you’d have to come to terms with how you felt, but until then, you’d deny the feelings every change you got.

***

uh...hi!! this is something pretty different from what i normally do 😅 i’m not too comfortable writing stuff like this but i’m trying my best! hopefully this was a nice introduction to this series. anyways, if you read all of it, thank you sm!! i can’t tell you how much i appreciate it. take care and stay safe!<333

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wonunuu · 4 years ago

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iris beauty ❀

18: unexpected night

✎ synopsis: falling for a guy is never easy, especially when your best friend of many years basically claimed him; you and mina have been friends for as long as you can remember, but your loyalty and trust are tested when she asks you to pretend to be her in meeting a guy she had been talking to online and you unintentionally start to develop feelings for him.

✎ genre: romance, angst, comedy, fluff

✎ pairing: reader x yoon jeonghan

✎ word count: 1.5k+

previous | mlist | next

a/n: i apologize in advance if there are some errors. this was not proofread and was written during the midnight :) always, send your thoughts!!! if you want to be tagged, add your url here!

❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀

After your short ten-minute break, you exit the locker room and head to the front counter, notifying your co-worker that your break had finished and that you were going to take over. Walking to the front counter, you greet a customer who was patiently waiting.

“Good afternoon! What can I get you today?” you ask the woman, whom you’ve probably seen before. “Just chai latte, please.” She smiles. You punch her order in, she hands you the money and you take it, placing it in the cashier machine. You give her the receipt and her order number, then start preparing her order.

As you give her her latte, you are surprised to see a familiar face, carefully inspecting the menu. “Thank you!” the woman says before exiting the door.

“What are you doing here?” You inquire. Jeonghan smiles at you, “Well, I was thinking we could go out tonight if you're free?”

“So you came here knowing that there's a possibility that I wouldn't be free?”, you asked, a little touched at his subtle act of kindness. He nods. Putting his kindness into consideration as you contemplate whether to lie and say you have plans or, to tell the truth, and agree.

Jeonghan bites the inside of his cheek as he awaits your answer, but lets out a breath of relief when he sees you nod. You agree for three reasons. One, not to make anything seem suspicious. Rejecting his offer to take you out will most likely make him suspicious as the real Mina, whom he’s been talking to, would say yes. Two, if he’s taking you out then that would mean you’d be eating real food, and not instant noodles that have been in the kitchen cabinets for God knows how long—they’re probably way too long past their expiration date. Third, you did feel bad that he travelled long distances to come to your workplace to ask you—as Mina—out on a date, knowing that you might not be able to go.

“I still have forty minutes left before I clock out, though”, you inform him, wiping the counter.

“That’s okay. I can just wait ‘till you finish. It's my fault for coming here without notice,” Jeonghan nervously laughs. “But I’d like something to drink while I wait.” You smile, shaking your head out of amusement. His shamelessness never fails to make you laugh. Jeonghan fondly stares at you, proud of himself for making you smile.

“Pick any, it’s my treat.” You tell him as you fiddle around with the cashier machine, preparing to put his order in. Jeonghan’s ears perk up at your words, specifically on the last three. He excitedly scans the menu again and picks a drink of his choice. You instruct him to sit on the empty table placed in the far corner of the room. Immediately, you start making his beverage, meticulously measuring the ingredients, and once finished, you walk to where he was seated and give it to him. “Thanks,” Jeonghan mutters before taking a sip, and you watch intently, waiting for his reaction. Jeonghan frowns, you start to get worried. “Is it not good? I can make you another one—”

“I’m just kidding, it tastes amazing.” You were cut off by Jeonghan suddenly wrapping his free arm around your waist and nuzzling his face into your stomach. You were taken aback by his actions but quickly reminded yourself that this is normal between couples—not that you and he are together, but you as Mina and he are together. Saying it in your head, you realize how confusing this whole pretending thing really is.

You roll your eyes and smack his shoulder, he lets out a yelp in response and rubs the spot, trying to ease the sting.

He giggles, “Go work now.” You give him an “okay” before leaving him alone for you to continue working.

“So where are we going?”

The two of you walk out to the cafe towards his car. Jeonghan tried to hold your hand but was saddened when you hid them in your pockets. Nonetheless, he brushes it off and continues to walk beside you.

“Uh,” he thought, looking up. “We have a few options, actually.”

You reach his car and he opens the door for you, acting like a gentleman—a tip from his friend, Joshua. You mumble a thank you before going in. He closes the door and jogs to the other side to go into the driver’s seat.

“A, we go to the movies,” he waits for your reaction. You shake your head, he looks confused. “I thought that was what was your ideal first date?”

You shook your head again, “I changed my mind. Tell me the other options.”

He clears his throat, “I—I actually don’t have anymore… I assumed you were going to agree to the movies.” He nervously admits. "I wanted to seem cool, you know? Like I have things planned." He looks at you hesitantly, embarrassed at his confession. You laugh, a little louder than intended, he laughs along.

“I can't believe you. Let me look up some fun places we can go.” You say, emphasizing the word ‘fun’, Jeonghan rolls his eyes in response.

Three long minutes have passed, lazily scrolling through your phone. Jeonghan, too, had his phone, looking for possible destinations that could interest the both of you.

Earlier, you both discussed and agreed that you wanted something interesting to do on your first date; not sitting on some chairs watching movies. When you were about to give up, something caught your eye. You gasped, causing Jeonghan to whip his head at you.

“There’s a night fair not too far from here! We need to go, please Han?” You excitedly squeaked, not knowing where the nickname came from. Jeonghan smirks at you, “New nickname? I like it.” Taking you by surprise, he grabs your free hand and places them on his cheek, caressing them gently with his thumb. “Give me the address, let’s go.”

The two of you walk tiredly around the fair after playing dozens of games. You knew about each other's competitive nature, so the competition in trying to win the games came naturally. You personally think a little competition made the games more enjoyable.

You'd say you guys are tied; even. You had won the ring toss, gaining a mug as a prize. He won the dart game, it turned out his aim was as accurate as cupid. Et cetera.

Now, you were trying to find something to fill your growling stomachs. There were many food booths open and you had been walking around for what felt like hours. You couldn't seem to find the right booth that offered the food. Until Jeonghan suddenly grabs your hand and pulls you towards a booth around the end of the road.

“Oh my god,” you almost scream out of joy. “How did you know?”

“It's my favourite too.” He tells you, smugly.

"Hello, can we get two nakji bokkuem, please? Thank you." He orders the food while you look around to find a table to sit at. Despite the number of people, you luckily find a free spot. You walk to the empty table, leaving Jeonghan to wait for the food by himself.

As you observe the boy from your seat, thoughts flood your head. You were suddenly worried about what Mina's reaction would be when you tell her that you, pretending to be Mina, have been meeting up with Jeonghan while she was gone. You weren't bothered about being caught because you were sure that you were going to pull it off. But one thing you fretted about the most is his reaction when Mina tells him the truth. Mina had told you that when she would come back from her trip, she would tell Jeonghan everything. You were scared for your best friend; you don't want her to feel heartbroken.

You push your thoughts to the side when you see Jeonghan approach, food in his hands. As he takes a seat, he wafts the smoke from the food towards you. You close your eyes inhaling the smell, causing your mouth to salivate.

"Here you go." He places the plate in front of you and takes out your chopsticks.

"You know I can do that right?" you laughed, taking the chopsticks from his hand.

"I know, but I want to do it for you," Jeonghan chuckles.

The table became silent when the two of you started to eat, of course, a few comments and giggles here and there. But the two of you were too focused on eating the food, that you forgot about each other's presence. Until Jeonghan started choking on his last bite, and you being you, you stayed seated laughing as you watched the boy struggle.

"Why didn't you help me?" Jeonghan whines, rubbing his neck.

"I was!" You exclaimed, trying to hold yourself from laughing further. "Moral support, you know?" you continue.

Jeonghan is out of words. "Laughing at me as I choke is not moral support!" He cried.

Your night was definitely unexpected, in the most possible good way. Spending your free time with Jeonghan was so amazing that you forgot you were even pretending to be someone else. Though you do feel guilty, you console yourself by saying that you were doing it for your best friend.

#seventeen #seventeen fluff #seventeen texts #seventeen imagines #svt imagines #svt #svt au #seventeen social media au #svt scenarios #svt texts #jeonghan scenarios #jeonghan fluff #jeonghan blurbs #jeonghan au

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helnjk · 4 years ago

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In a Crowd of Thousands - Part 2 // F.W.

Fred Weasley x fem!reader

Word Count: 3.1k

Summary: You never really forget your childhood love. For Princess Y/N of Diagon, hers came in the form of a boy whose dream it was to start a business and support his family. As it goes, life–and her duty to her kingdom–had gotten in the way. She longed to see him again, to see the success she was sure he had achieved. Luckily, fate was on her side.

Warnings: food mention, alcohol mention (champagne, blink and you’ll miss it), gambling mention (it’s a small bet, blink and you’ll miss it again)

A/N: okay but im lowkey proud of this part. this is the last official ‘chapter’ of this mini series, and i’m really excited to share it with y’all hihi xx

(also also, there’s a bonus part at the end that you don’t have to read but i love it lol)

flashbacks are in italics

Prologue | Part 1

The grand ballroom of the palace was packed with people.

Princess Y/N of Diagon sighed internally as her eyes swept over its expanse. At 21 years old, she was mere months away from her coronation. And, as tradition dictated, a ball was being held in her honor and she avoided it until the last minute that she could.

To be quite honest, she thought that the idea of a ‘presentation’ was completely outdated and there was absolutely no need for it. She was more than familiar with her people and she didn’t need this night of frivolity and grandiosity to prove it.

When Minerva first brought up the idea of having to fake a smile and discuss politics in a stuffy room with a bunch of aristocrats, Y/N immediately rolled her eyes. She knew that it was tradition for her to be ‘presented’ to her kingdom, but she also knew that those invited to the ball would not be able to speak for the majority of her subjects. They would be nobles, far too uptight and far too removed from the masses to know what they would truly need.

They were exactly the kind of people the princess tried very hard to avoid when she went on her rounds throughout the towns and met with people of all walks of life.

The Princess was very dedicated to living out her goal of being a fair and just leader. From the moment she turned 16, she made it a point to immerse herself in the lives of those who relied on her for, well, everything. Though, much of the fire under her had to do with the initials etched into the trunk of a tree that stood tall and proud by the banks of the river.

Her reaction to the news of the ball, however, wasn’t appreciated by her governess. Not that she needed a governess anymore, but Y/N would always be grateful for the strong and steady presence that Minerva had been her whole life.

“Oh don’t look at me like that,” she defended, crossing her arms over her chest, “Even you know how useless these kinds of things are.”

Minerva merely shook her head and tried to look stern, “Yes, well, it is tradition, at least try and enjoy yourself. You are not expected to speak with investors and nobles all night, and there will be many opportunities to eat and to dance!”

“As long as my corset isn’t too tight, I think I can manage an evening with the snooty elite.”

“My dear I hope you know that you are a part of the snooty elite.”

True to her word, Y/N managed to get through several conversations without any sarcastic remarks or backhanded compliments. In fact, she found herself enjoying the party much more than she had anticipated. The music was lovely, the food phenomenal, and she daresay her dress was absolutely stunning.

She was fetching herself a drink when a familiar voice spoke next to her, “Well don’t you clean up nicely, sweetheart.”

“Lord Black!” the princess exclaimed, turning to him and letting out one of the few genuine smiles of the night. “I wasn’t aware you were going to be attending the ball! If I did, I would’ve stuck by your side the moment I entered.”

The older man’s eyes crinkled at the compliment and he leant in for a warm hug.

Sirius Black was one of the only aristocrats that the Princess actually held a fondness for. The moment the pair met at one of the first few meetings the King and Queen had allowed her to attend, Y/N knew that he was of the right sort.

He came from very very old money, but once his parents had passed and he was given access to the Black fortune and title, he began to make very good changes wherever he could. He was a silent investor in many business ventures, and more often than not, the businesses he chose to support would end up flourishing.

“Anything new and exciting to tell me about?” Y/N asked, taking a sip of her sickly sweet champagne.

Sirius’ eyes lit up at the question, “I met a very promising pair of brothers–twins, actually. Their minds are as sharp as a knife, and they’ve got the most absurd ideas! Brilliant, but absurd. I think they can make it work.”

“I’m excited to hear more about them, then.”

The pair spent a good amount of time chatting away, seeking refuge at one of the emptier tables and settling. This was a great compromise for the Princess, who was hitting two birds with one stone as she spoke to someone she enjoyed the company of as well as someone who was a part of the ‘snooty elite’.

He spoke about his godson and how he was learning to walk and absolutely terrorizing his parents. In return, she told him about how the coronation planning was driving her up the wall. It felt good to be this open and genuine with someone, especially at a function like the one they were attending.

Sirius was in the middle of an exciting anecdote about Harry’s adventures with his mother’s makeup when Y/N caught a glimpse of fiery red hair.

Her heart stopped and leaped simultaneously in her chest.

As if they were being pulled by a magnet, her eyes focused solely on the familiar silhouette weaving in and out of the crowd. Her tunnel vision allowed her to see him and only him, and her mind began to go on overdrive.

“Princess?”

She barely registered the older man calling out to her, too distracted by the thought of seeing him again. Of being in the same place as him again. Of finally speaking the words she held in her heart for years to him.

“Excuse me for a moment,” was all she managed to get out.

Y/N could hear her blood rushing to her ears as she pushed through the, frankly too many, people in the way of her and her best friend. She didn’t care if she wasn’t behaving in a way that a Queen-to-be should be behaving, she didn’t care about any niceties at the moment. The last few years for her were spent almost completely alone, without her favorite redhead by her side, and she would be damned if she was going to let this opportunity slip through her fingers.

If she was being honest, time hadn’t done much to settle the grief she felt over the Weasleys moving away. Every little thing had reminded her of Fred and she was ashamed to admit that she wasn’t as open to new relationships–or friendships–because of the lingering feelings she harbored for the twin.

But now, now she had the chance to finally speak to him after so long. To feel the familiar comfort of his presence, to be herself and not have to worry about being the perfect royal that she was expected to be.

Everything seemed to happen in slow motion.

Y/N could see Fred, he was right there, only a few steps away with his back turned to her. He was laughing at something the person he was speaking to had said, his whole body shaking with unabashed glee. Someone in front of him called out her name as they saw her approach and she watched as he froze for a fraction of a second before turning on his heel.

Their eyes met and she paused mid-step.

The world was coated in molasses now, everything around her moving haltingly slow as they saw each other for the first time in years. All other things in the room melted away as he stepped forward, and suddenly he was standing right in front of her.

“Hi,” she breathed.

“Hi,” he replied, charmile smile and all, “I told you we’d find each other again, didn’t I?”

Y/N let out a small laugh, still in shock that Fred was really in front of her. His arms wrapped around her torso in a tentative hug, and she spared no time clinging on to him with a ferocity that surprised even her. It was almost as if she was trying to convince herself he was really and truly there. Luckily for the princess, he had no qualms with how tightly she was gripping onto him.

When she finally eased her hold, he held out his arm. “Care for a dance, Princess?”

“I’d love to.”

All eyes were on them as they walked onto the dance floor, clearly not just another pair among the others. Still, Y/N only had eyes for the man in front of her. Her eyes scanned over his features, taking note of the things that changed and the things that didn’t.

Fred was still her Fred, just older now, more confident. He had an air around him that wasn’t there the last time she saw him. It was a pleasant surprise, though, seeing him so sure of himself as he spun her around.

Music flowed around them as Y/N was dipped and twirled. She had never felt more like royalty than she had in that moment, dancing with Fred Weasley, her hand in his. Everything around them seemed to melt away as they moved through the dance floor, eyes locked and bodies pressed together.

Even when the music paused and they left the dancefloor, their hands remained intertwined.

Slowly, those in attendance began to make their leave. Some passed by the Princess to say their goodbyes and politely thank her for the night, but most knew better than to interrupt her time with someone who was clearly quite important to her.

Y/N had never been more thankful for the night to be ending.

“Didn’t know you were so popular, Y/N” Fred teased after another nobleman bid her goodnight.

“I am a Princess after all,” she replied, watching the man leave.

“And a damn good one, I’ve heard.”

She turned to look at him, “Been asking around about me, have you?”

The look he gave her nearly made her swoon. It was full of affection and admiration, taking the princess off guard.

Instead of answering, he merely cocked his head in the direction of the exit, saying “Fancy a walk through the grounds? I hear it’s been decorated quite beautifully for the night.”

After spending so much time packed in a crowded room, it was a welcome relief to be in the cool evening air. True to Fred’s word, the gardens looked spectacular. Lights glittered through every little nook and cranny, the soft trickling of water from the fountains filling the air. It felt like something from a fairytale.

The pair of them walked together in a peaceful silence, sneaking glances at each other every once in a while. It wasn’t until they found themselves in front of the old weeping willow that they paused.

“Remember this place?” Fred chuckled, his eyes scanning over the draping branches covered in glittering lights.

“How could I forget?”

For the first time that night since they had seen each other, Y/N let go of Fred’s hand. She gently moved aside the curtain of leaves in front of them and stepped into their childhood sanctuary. Fred had to take a moment just to take in the sight of her, a vision in the midst of a sea of stars.

His heart stuttered in his chest.

“Do you remember what we promised each other here?” he asked again, eyes shifting to the trunk behind her.

“It’s on my mind more often than not,” she admitted, feeling heat creep up her neck.

If he noticed how flustered she got, he didn’t comment. Instead, he said, “Me too.”

Y/N was right in front of the trunk now, running her fingers over the indented wood. Nimble digits pausing when they brushed over their initials. Fred couldn’t see her expression, but he could tell that there were many things running through her mind at that moment.

“I think I’ve held up my end of the bargain,” his voice filled the quiet air, “George and I have a rather successful shop in town, if I do say so myself.”

The Princess turned around to face him with a smile, her back to the tree, “I think I’m on my way to fulfilling mine.”

As they spoke, their bodies slowly inched towards each other, magnets unable to stay away. The air around them was charged, pushing the two together bit by bit. Soon, they were toe to toe, breaths mingling and eyes locking.

“I think,” Fred whispered, “I think I’m going to fulfill another dream of mine tonight.”

Time froze as his face dipped close enough for their lips to brush. Y/N let out a soft gasp as he drew close, body abuzz with nervous energy and skin alight with every touch. Fred was there to ease her mind, though, with warm hands at the small of her back and soft lips gently pressing against hers.

She felt herself melting into his arms, melting into the kiss as if it was what she was born to do. Nothing else seemed to matter at that moment.

Like waves finding their way back to the shore, crashing into each other the way only the ocean could, somehow Y/N always knew that Fred would always find his way back to her. The mere thought of it brought a smile to her face and she laughed as he kissed into her smile. Once, twice, three times.

“You are my dream,” Fred whispered once they broke apart, both of them sharing the same dopey grins.

“And you are mine,” she replied, pressing her palm to his heart.

–

The clock tower had already struck midnight when Princess Y/N and Fred decided to make their way back to the castle. The night was far too short for their liking, but it comforted them to know that they had the next day (and the next and the next, and so on) for them to spend with each other.

Their pace remained leisurely as they walked through the familiar place. The castle seemed brand new to the princess now. It was coated in a new light as she looked at it with fresh eyes and a happy heart. She came to the realization that the years spent apart from Fred were far too silent and still without him. Now that she had him by her side, the halls seemed to be filled with happiness and light.

The laughter echoing through the halls and the adrenaline pumping through her as they tried to remain unseen was a welcome feeling. It was familiar, almost intimate in a way. She was thrown back to when they were little and Fred had started teaching her about all the different secrets and passageways the castle had to offer.

“This way, Princess!” a young boy’s voice whisper-yelled to Y/N’s right.

She spun towards the direction of the sound to see Fred pulling aside a large tapestry. Behind it was a hallway she had never seen before. Her eyes widened at the sight, but she did not hesitate to duck into it.

“How did you ever find this place?” she asked, eyes scanning the narrow but comfortable passageway, “And where does it lead to?”

“I spend a lot of time running away from mother,” Fred shrugged. That earned him a laugh from the princess and he let himself feel smug. “This is a shorter way back up to your room, if you’re ever in a hurry.”

Now, instead of shortcuts and easy ways to get from one place to the other, the pair found themselves taking their time. Fred would tug on her hand and bring them into an empty alcove, stealing kisses and sharing soft smiles. His body was warm, a comforting presence beside hers, and Y/N found herself leaning against his side more often than not.

By the time they found themselves outside the Princess’ chamber doors, they were giggling like little children, running away from governesses and mothers.

Y/N’s back was pressed against the door suddenly as Fred’s body enveloped hers in a searing kiss. Her heart beat erratically in her chest as her hands found themselves clutching at his coat.

Then, as quick as he had come, Fred pulled away with a smirk, “Until we see each other next, Princess?”

She scoffed, “If you think I don’t have the resources to track you down and kill you for saying that, you’re wrong.”

“I’m only joking,” he grinned and wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her to him once again, “We always find our way back to each other, don’t we?”

The princess rolled her eyes, but he could see the edges of her lips trying–and failing–not to quirk up.

BONUS

Sirius watched as the Princess hastily stood up from her seat next to him and hurried off in the direction of Fred Weasley. The same Fred Weasley he had been working with for the past few months.

He tried not to stare, but it was too tempting not to. His eyes followed the girl as she deftly wove through the throng of people–people who tried to grab her attention to no avail. It was clear that she had a goal in mind and she wouldn’t stop until she got what she wanted.

He watched as they locked eyes, as they shared identical smiles, as they glided through the dance floor and eventually made their way towards the gardens. It was almost ridiculous how elated he felt at the sight.

The chair beside him made a sound as it was pulled back and he turned to see who had taken a seat beside him. Sirius tried to ignore the man next to him, the man who gave him nothing but a smug smile, but it was useless.

“Enjoying yourself?” he asked, lips quirking slightly.

“I think you owe me a few galleons,” Remus replied, looking very pleased. He cleaned up quite well in his navy blue suit, and Sirius had to hold back from causing a scene in the middle of a very prestigious ball just so that he could show Remus how much he loved him.

Sirius rolled his eyes fondly, “So quick to judge the events that transpired this evening, Moony.”

The look his husband gave him was enough for him to dig into his pockets for a few of the gold coins. Remus held out his hand, opening and closing it in front of him smugly.

“You know,” Sirius said as he pressed the money into Remus’ palm, “When I made a bet against you, saying I was positive that the woman Fred was in love with was not the Princess, I really thought I was going to win.”

Remus pressed a kiss on his cheek and smiled, “Never bet against me, love, you’re never going to win.”

Series Taglist: @prismarts @snoopydoop1 @the-romanian-is-bae @demoiselle-en-detresse00 @manuosorioh @daltonacademia

General taglist: @expectoevans @george-fabian-weasley @gxthsanrio @slytherinscribbles @harpyloon @nuttytani @mesmerisedangel @amourtentiaa @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @lumos-barnes @cherryweasleys @writingsomewrongs @the-unmanaged-mischief @mrzweasley @inglourious-imagines @pr3ttysw33t @amrtxntias @miraclesoflove @thatlonelyalto

Weasley twins taglist: @pineapplesandpinas @papapapadumb @a-castle-of--glass @hey-there-angels @leovaldez37 @pinkypurplemagic @werewolfslut @surprizeshawtyy @oldschoolkiddo @gcdricreads @turtletaylor98 @secret-obsessions @weaslxyss @serendiipty @nojamsonmytoast @famdomhideout @georgeweasley19 @asuperconfusedgirl @loonylovegood13 @lumielikesbooks @nanahachikyuu @freds-slut @theweasleytwinsgirl @ghost3rr @littlemisswitt @astoria-malfcy @weasleysprofessionalhoe @freddie-weaselbee @daydreamgirl8 @jubilee-the-flying-dragon-pirate

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#fred weasley #fred weasley fanfiction #fred weasley imagines #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley fics #fred weasley fic #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley x y/n #fred weasley au #tw food mention #tw alcohol mention #tw gambling mention

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andraaste · 3 years ago

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I am not your enemy - Lance fanfiction part 17

This is finally chapter 17 ! I'm so sorry for the wait and hope you enjoy it !! Good summer to all of you 🌴🐉

Chapter 17 : I’ll personally take care of making him understand that you belong to me

- Ophelia !

I opened my eyes sharply.

Stretched out full length on the mattress, my back sticking unpleasantly to the fabric of my top, I stared at the black ceiling to come to my senses, my jerky breathing breaking the serene silence of the night.

What the hell was going on ?

My heart rate pounding wildly, I felt like I had run a marathon as my chest heaved with frenzy as the images of this incomprehensible dream circled in my head.

Spear.

It was him, I was sure. I had seen him, his face so young, evolving through different scenes from his past. Seeing him like that had confused me. Proud, playful, oblivious to his surroundings, he was a whole different person from the one I knew now. But ... I had also known him that way. Strange as it may sound, Lance had been my first support when I arrived at HQ. The rest of the story was unfortunately only inglorious.

Especially when I thought back to my buried feelings.

Except that this dream, was it really one ? The little girl had conjured up the deepest memories of the last of the dragons, but what did that mean ? And above all, why ?

My gaze was caught by something that seemed to escape my parted lips. My eyes widened, I watched in amazement as tiny ice crystals smeared the air around the edge of my mouth. When I realized what this implied, my breathing quickened again and very soon, I thought I recognized the light cold breath that the dragon had made me experience a few days earlier.

No, it wasn’t possible.

I shouldn't be able to develop Lance's powers without his presence ... right ?

Straightening up on my bed, I was leaning on my right arm when a strange sensation took hold of me. Slowly lifting my sleeve over my shoulder, I was speechless when I saw the dragon's familiar icy welts as he let them roam my body. Except that for that, we had always needed a physical contact, it was the very reason which had made us discover this phenomenon.

Fascinated, I let my fingers run over the thin blue lines that cornered my skin. I had the strange sensation of feeling him brush against my arm.

My hand immediately tightened on my flesh when something came back to me.

That night, when I had been in his memories, if that had really been the case, Lance and I had brushed against each other in the Crystal Room. By the time our arms had made contact, I was sure the young man had reacted, seeming to be looking for me without actually being able to see me.

But how could he have felt me physically if what I had seen were memories, moreover of which I wasn’t a part ? Raising my arm to my face, I felt the adrenaline slow down. I had to leave these questions hanging.

At least until daybreak.

As soon as the sun shines, I got up to take a shower, hoping to chase away even a few moments the images of those dreams that had haunted me all the rest of the night. I finally didn’t manage to fall asleep again and it was with more than deep circles that I headed for the shared showers.

As soon as I left my room, I was surprised to find a very early-morning Nevra who was also visibly leaving his den, his door being a few meters away from mine.

When he saw me, the vampire raised his eyebrows in surprise before giving me a slight mocking smile.

- I know one who didn't sleep very well.

Great. I rubbed a hand over my tired eyes, hoping to regain my composure.

- Not so much, indeed. Is it showing that much ?

- Well, not that you look less in shape than usual, that would be complicated, but you seem rather tired yes, he said to me without being able to hold back a laugh at my annoyed expression. But you still look very pretty, don't worry.

Already ready to give him a bloody answer, his last sentence stopped me in my tracks. Damn but what an idiot, why did I feel my cheeks blush ?

Locking my door, I remained resolutely turned towards the wooden door in order to hide my dismay.

- I see that I can count on you to reassure me, in any case, I say while feigning indifference.

I heard his laughter echo between us once again.

- You know I'm a trustworthy person.

Without realizing it, I began to smile in turn. I loved the rare moments in which he forgot his cold mask of the right arm of the Sparkling.

- By the way ... he began, his gaze suddenly fleeing, seeming to hesitate on how he was going to phrase the rest. Have you been better since the other night ? I worried a lot, I didn't understand what happened. Eweleïn only told me that she already knew about it and that she was monitoring your condition closely.

- Oh, yes ... I'm so sorry for what happened and I hope I didn't cause you too much trouble. But I think I’ve nothing left. I wanted to thank you for taking care of me, I don't know what ...

- Don't talk nonsense, he cut me off. Maybe I was stupid to you, but I certainly wasn't going to leave you like this.

Running a hand through his hair, I saw concern grow on his face, so often marble.

- And I don't want to sound intrusive, but you'll have to explain to me what happened. I’ve never seen anything like it happen.

His eye, similar in color to mine, observed me so intently that I couldn't bring myself to lie to him.

- Okay, I'll explain it to you, I whispered. Just give me a little time.

- Good, he smiles at me before recovering quickly. With all this, I was almost going to fail in my task. Huang Hua would like you to attend the next Sparkling meeting.

I stared at him for several seconds, not knowing how to react.

- Huang Hua wants to send me on a mission ?

His lips twitched slightly.

- I can’t tell you more at the moment, but I don’t hide from you that it doesn’t enchant me very much considering what happened to you the last time we saw each other.

- Nevra…

I no longer knew on which foot to dance with him. Since our discussion, I had the impression that a lot of things had changed between us but I didn’t know how to perceive them.

- The meeting will take place in an hour in the Council room, don't be late.

The vampire dismissed me without giving me time to answer anything.

Excited at the prospect of potentially taking part in a future mission, I showered in fourth gear, almost forgetting what had happened that night. But it was the lump in my stomach that I knocked on the front door that I had only borrowed a few times.

Opening the door cautiously, I entered the majestic room. I could not restrain my gaze from browsing the large tree which stood proudly between these walls, the immense window which overlooked the gardens of the HQ or the immense prostrate table in the center of the room. I hadn’t often had the opportunity to enter here, but each time I was amazed by what was hiding there.

It was mind blowing.

It was only after my little inspection of the premises that I became aware of the people already here. Facing the large window, Huang Hua stood erect, arms crossed, staring into space. Her tanned skin bathed in natural light caught my gaze of admiration as her fine features turned to me as I reached the bottom of the stairs. Her warm gaze relaxed me immediately.

- Andraste, there you are ! she said to me with a smile of genuine astonishment. Unfortunately I haven't had the opportunity to see you lately, how are you ? I’ve been kept informed of your condition…

I stood stunned for a few seconds at the warmth and sincerity I could read in her at that moment. Since when hadn't I seen her like that ?

- It's going much better, thank you. If that's any reassurance, my back seems perfectly healed. Well, for now, I added with a wry laugh.

Until my wings decide once again to do what they want, I hear.

- You see me delighted, I hope we can discuss a little more calmly later, you and me.

Pointing me to the seats, she added :

- Please sit down.

Let my gaze slide over the people seated in front of the huge table. Surprisingly, I recognized Leiftan, Mathieu and Koori very close to me. I wasn't the only guest, which relieved me. I also like almost all of the Sparkling members.

All except two of them, who were visibly missing.

Pulling the first seat I could find, I settled myself between the kitsune and Chrome. The big wolf smile fills my whole field of vision.

- Hi Andraste! You're going to attend your first Sparkling reunion, I'm super happy, he said while pointing out his canines.

My smile widens automatically in the face of his good humor.

- Hi Chrome, I'm happy too ! But still a little stressed, I won't hide it from you.

- Don't worry, everything will be fine.

The large door opened again, letting in the two missing limbs. My heart raced even more when the two men sat down in front of me.

- Perfect. Lance, Nevra, we were just waiting for you to begin, Huang Hua announced. As you know, several strange phenomena have occurred in recent months, the barrier between Earth and Eldarya has never been thinner. Several people have reported to us the sudden appearance of a building in the middle of the lands of Genkaku.

Without understanding why, I felt Koori tense up at hearing that name.

- Andraste, Nevra told me about an important point.

The vampire spoke in turn.

- Seven years ago, you told me about very tall human buildings in which people lived or worked. Heum...

- Are you talking about buildings ? I stopped him. Are you saying that a building has appeared on Eldarya ?

I couldn't believe my ears, it wasn't possible. How could a building have landed here ? What if people were inside ?

Mathieu and I gave each other a horrified look. It really didn't bode well.

- Exactly, he concluded. Nothing like this has ever been reported between our two worlds but we have to make sure that it’s indeed a human building. That's why we would need Mathieu and you to go there. Obviously, you’ll be accompanied by other members of the Guard.

Turning to the kitsune, Nevra added :

- Koori, we’ll also need your presence. You’re the only one here who knows the lands of Genkaku.

- Yes, I understand. You can count on me...

The face of the leader of the Sparkling clouded with a compassionate expression.

- I'm sorry to ask you this, I know it won't be easy for you, but we can only count on your presence to guide them in these lands.

- I know Huang Hua. There’s no problem, I’ll accompany you.

- As far as Tenjin is concerned, we'll have to be careful, Lance continued. He’s bound to learn for our coming and we will probably not be welcome.

When the dragon spoke, everyone seemed to be listening to him with some form of respect. I was fascinated by the presence that saw him unconsciously.

It had been two days since the dragon and I had seen each other, the latter being too busy with the upcoming mission departure and his duties as Chief of the Guard. I hadn't had a chance to tell him about my dream, and actually didn't even know whether to tell him about it or not. Knowing him here made me nervous and hearing his voice made my stomach contract. The last time we saw each other was in his bed…

Red rose to my cheeks once again when his gaze brushed mine. I couldn't tear myself away from him for several seconds.

- Lance is right, Tenjin is our main obstacle to getting to the kitsune lands of Genkaku, the vampire said. He's unstable and is very likely to come after us when he sees Koori. That’s why I’m accompanying you as well. It’s rare that we send multiple Guard Chiefs, but this mission’s likely to be more perilous than the usual ones.

Turning to the aengel in his turn, he added, his face suddenly darker :

- I hope we can count on you. You are an outstanding navigator and your abilities have been proven to us more than once. Finally, if you want to stop your « redemption ».

Leiftan clenched his teeth at this last remark, the tension was most palpable between the two men.

- Nevra, we already talked about this. If you have things to settle with Leiftan, it’ll be within the framework of the private one, said Huang Hua.

- You can count on my presence, but I’ll not use my powers, it’s my only condition.

Nevra was about to reply when the fenghuang stopped him with a wave of her hand.

- Perfect, if everyone agrees, the team for this mission will therefore consist of Nevra, Lance, Koori, Mathieu, Leiftan and Andraste. An objection ?

- None, replied Huang Chu. I hope you’ll come back with some new human study topics, that's all I'm asking.

When the meeting is over, the assembly leaves the room in turn. As I was about to climb the stairs to the exit, the delicate and warm hand of the ancient phoenix grabbed my wrist.

- Andraste, can I talk to you for a moment ?

I nodded while stopping my run.

- Eweleïn kept me informed of your physical and mental state. Do you feel like doing this mission ?

- I think so. To tell the truth, I start to circle around the HQ aimlessly. It’ll do me good to feel really useful and to change horizons, even though I know it won't be easy and even dangerous. I’ve practiced a lot and I manage to reuse my powers a bit, not like before, but they are there. Perhaps, in case of real necessity, they will manifest themselves normally. At least I hope so.

A soft smile lit up her face.

- Very well, I count on you to take care of you and to come back to us safe and sound. Unfortunately, Mathieu and you are the only people able to tell us more about this building, I’ve no choice but to send you there with your agreement, of course.

Plunging into her reassuring gaze, I had the fleeting impression of finding the Huang Hua that I knew.

- There’s nothing to worry about. Anyway, I'll be well surrounded, I’ve nothing to fear, I said with a smile.

As I closed the door to the Council Chamber behind me, I lost myself in thoughts of this last exchange. Huang Hua confused me without knowing why. Lifting my head, I fell on Lance who seemed to have been waiting for me. With his arms crossed, he pulled himself away from the wall he was leaning against to walk slowly towards me.

- You're not going to be able to get to Genkaku like that.

Puzzled, I raised an eyebrow.

- Can you light my lantern ?

As he approached dangerously, my whole body tensed in anticipation of what he planned to do. I was no longer in control of myself in his presence and that irritated me.

Unexpectedly, he grabbed my arm firmly and turned me around to rest my back against his chest. His lips caressed my ear in his deep voice.

- You are not sufficiently trained in combat and you are far too pretty for Tenjin not to try to keep you to himself. I don’t like it.

- And how do you plan to fix it ? I questioned him, my breath suddenly more choppy.

- Since I can't force you to stay at the HQ, I think I'll have to train you for combat. I'm going to be pretty busy, but I'll find time for your training.

Slowly letting go of my arm, he added :

- For the rest, I’ll personally take care of making him understand that you belong to me.

(Chapter 18)

#eldarya #eldarya new era #beemoov #eldarya lance #lance eldarya #lance #eldarya the origins #ashkore #eldarya a new era #eldarya fanfiction #eldarya lance fanfic #eldarya fanfic #eldarya lance fanfiction #fanfiction

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missymurphy1985 · 3 years ago

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Nobody's Perfect (part3)

Warning - smut / language

Taglist @queenshelby @margoo0 @being-worthy @peakyscillian @ntmynouis @janelongxox @elenavampire21 @noctvrnalmoth @ysmmsy @cloudofdisney @lauren-raines-x

Steve Knight, the writer, came onset to talk to you and Cillian alone a couple of days after your kiss with Cillian in your trailer. You were nervous - surely he didn't know...? You'd been so good - treating Cillian the same as you had any other member of the cast or crew - Tash was so proud of you.

"We've rejigged the script slightly. Wanted to go over it with you first?" Steve said, sat opposite you both in his trailer. You were stunned. You knew he discussed the scripts in advance with Cillian, but you'd never been included before. The original script had Clara dying at the end of series 1, being taken out by Sabini himself in a dramatic showdown.

"Whatever it is I'm sure it'll be grand, what you thinking?" Cillian nodded after being handed a new draft of it. Handing it to you, he raised his eyebrows and looked away.

Opening up the pages, you also took in a breath. Clara was to become pregnant... Tommy would marry her before the end of series 1. Which meant she would now be in series 2. You were thrilled that your character would be staying, but also horrified that you'd have to spend more time with Cillian. No way were you letting it show though.

"I've given you both the afternoon off - get to know the new script and your characters new dynamic. Back on tomorrow morning at 9am? I only have one copy of that draft though, sorry, damn printer ran out of ink."

"No problem. We can share this one, right Cillian?" He looked at you and nodded, silently.

You both headed back to your own trailers before Cillian knocked on your door 30 minutes later as planned. Sitting down at the table, you put the kettle on.

"So Tommy knocks her up then?" You said, trying to lighten the mood as you made the two of you a coffee.

"Only a matter of time really - they're at it like fucking rabbits and I don't think condoms were a thing in 1919," he chuckled. "Their relationship isn't brilliant though, is it?"

"He hates her. But he can't keep away from her. She hates him for not being able to keep away from her." You couldn't ignore the irony.

"Yeah. They don't want each other, but they're drawn to each other."

"She wants to punch him, and fuck him. In equal measure." You saw Cillian smirk slightly but chose to ignore it.

Two mugs sat in front of you as you both scanned the floor in silence.

"I need to clear this up once and for all y/n, okay..." You opened your mouth to silence him but he put a hand up to silence you instead. "What happened was.. I didn't.. I didn't want to hurt you y/n."

"Who said you hurt me?"

"No one said it, but what I did to you..." You scoffed, interrupting him.

"It was just sex, Cillian."

"Good sex though." He chuckled. You shrugged.

"Not bad I guess." He looked almost hurt, but you stayed deadpan.

"Right... Okay so what have we got coming up next?" He changed the subject quickly, took a sip of his coffee and opened the script. "It would appear that you tell me you're pregnant tomorrow. And I don't exactly react well."

"Tommy has commitment issues." You were deadpan in your response, almost laughing but straight faced. He was too busy circling the handle on his coffee mug to notice.

"That he does. That he does. Reckon Clara might bring out the softer side of him in series 2?"

"I'm not convinced he has a softer side."

"I think he does. Just keeps it closed off to everyone. If he's on guard, no one can hurt him. He stays in control - the second he loses control he knows he'll get hurt."

"Maybe." A short pause in the conversation.

"Are you being intentionally dismissive, or is it just part of your nature?" His question took you by surprise.

"Are you for real?!" You couldn't pretend any more, it was getting too much.

"What?"

"You're calling ME dismissive? Are you not seeing the irony in that question?"

He nodded. Couldn't argue that if he tried.

"You done?" You asked, breaking the silence and confusing Cillian.

"What do you mean?"

"Your coffee." He looked down at it, still full and now cold.

"Yeah, I guess so. Listen, can we talk - "

"Nothing to discuss Cillian. We had sex, that's all there is to it. You had your fun, let's move on shall we?"

"And you didn't?"

"It was fine."

"Fine?? The fuck, y/n? What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's all good Cillian, honestly."

You stood up and took both mugs over to the sink, rinsing them under the tap.

"So are we rehearsing the scene for tomorrow or what?" You asked, turning to face him, but he was suddenly right behind you.

"Listen.. I meant what I said, okay? I didn't mean to hurt you.." he took your hand in his and brought it up to rest on his chest. His heart was pounding under the t-shirt he was wearing. "That's why I can't get close y/n. Okay?" You felt his heart racing and couldn't hide a blush in your cheeks, your own pulse felt like it was on fire.

"I don't understand Cillian.."

"That's how it felt that night. And that's how it feels every time I see you, hear your voice, talk to someone about you. And it scares me, okay?"

"Why does it scare you?"

"Because... The last time I felt it..." his fingers linked with yours, you could feel your resolve breaking as he moved closer to you. "I got that beating heart destroyed. I won't let it happen again." Your faces were inches apart now. Your own heart was beating out of your chest now, your breathing heavy. Without thinking, you leaned forward and kissed him. He pulled back, unsure, before crashing back onto you.

"Cillian..." You breathed, your body on fire as he pushed his core into yours, making you groan deeply.

"Don't let me in, y/n... Please tell me to stop.." you were trying, but the need in you was too strong.

"I can't... I can't stop you.."

"I'm only gonna let you down y/n.." his lips were on your neck now, hands roaming over your hips and up to your breasts. Words were failing you as your core throbbed for him. Pushing him back, he fell back onto the chair. You straddled his legs and held his head back to look into your eyes, gathering your senses.

"You already have let me down," you rocked your hips against his erection under his jeans, your clit brushing against the material making you gasp.

"I have.."

"You like to have the control, don't you? More like Tommy than you realised. Aren't you?" Your hips moved faster, his breathing was becoming heavier at the contact and friction.

"Maybe..."

"You make me crazy Cillian.. fuck..." Your clit against his jeans was almost too much for you, your could feel an orgasm building quickly. His groans against your mouth were driving you even closer.

"Y/n please..."

"No.. wait..." You couldn't stop your hips rocking, your hands on his shoulders for support as you came hard, you felt his hands on your waist, squeezing the flesh gently as you came down from your high.

He lifted you off him and wrapped your legs round his waist as he carried you to the counter, sitting you on it and pulling your jeans and underwear down, swiftly followed by his own. Grabbing a condom from his wallet he pulled it on and entered you, his mouth attacking your neck and a hand roughly gripping your breast as he pushed in and out slowly.

"Fuck... You feel so good y/n..." You tightened the grip with your legs, pulling him in harder. He was happy to comply, as his thrusts, although still slow, became more powerful, jerking into you and hitting that spot inside every time. You threw your head back as a second orgasm built.

"Faster Cillian... Please..." You clenched your muscles around him to let him know how close you were and he pulled you off the counter, sitting back on the chair. You easily sank back onto him and rocked your hips forward and back, building a hard but steady rhythm.

"My god... You're beautiful y/n... Look at you..." His eyes watching you riding him were sending shockwaves through you. You were already close - his thumb on your clit edging you closer.

"You gonna?" He breathed, watching your head loll back. You nodded, before a powerful orgasm flooded you, your hips moving almost erratically now. He groaned, pulling your body closer and pressing his lips to yours as he came, filling the condom and holding you in his arms. You caught your breath, before easing off him. He reached down to catch the condom as you moved over to the sofa. You watched him head to the bathroom to dispose of it.

"Y/n?"

"Yeah..."

"Don't suppose you're on birth control?" You laughed - clearly not a fan of condoms.

"No. Why?"

He came back out of the bathroom, his face a shade of grey.

"The condom split, y/n..."

#cillian smut #cillian murphy #cillian x fem!reader #cillian murphy x reader #peaky blinder fanfic #cillian x smut

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